TNA Weekly PPV #17
Date: October 16, 2002
Location: Tennessee State Fairgrounds Arena, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Don West, Mike Tenay

Back to this after a much needed five months away. This company just isn’t interesting at this point but they somehow survived through all this. Syxx Pac is X-Division Champion and gets to defend tonight against AJ Styles in what has the potential to be a solid match. Let’s get to it.

We open with a much needed recap. Jorge Estrada issued a challenge to Sonny Siaki and they square off tonight.

We’re also getting a showdown between Hermie Sadler/BG James vs. Jeff Jarrett/Bruce.

Chris and Rick Michaels get a World Tag Team Titles match tonight after beating one of the Harris Brothers/Sonny Siaki last week.

Jorge Rivera says the Flying Elvises are all shook up but there’s no reason for interviewer Goldilocks to sweat on her blue suede shoes over it. He brings in his new Priscilla and says there’s going to be talent search for the new Elvis. Brian Christopher interrupts and demands to know where his girlfriend April is. Goldilocks doesn’t know and Brian storms off. Jorge says he’s looking for the swivel in the new Elvis.

David Young vs. Brian Lawler

April comes out before the match and Brian is annoyed at her for making him wait. He demands April sit in a chair at ringside before flipping off the fans. Lawler hammers away in the corner but stops to dance. I guess that’s supposed to show his anger? Back up and Young takes over with a hiptoss and a clothesline to put Lawler on the floor. They get back inside and Young charges into a superkick so Lawler can thrust his crotch at the crowd.

In an old Memphis tactic, Lawler gets the referee looking at the crowd and hits David low. Young comes back by loading Brian up for an Alabama Slam but instead spins around and drops him face first on the mat. A DDT gets two for David but he misses a moonsault. Brian misses his top rope legdrop as well so David climbs the ropes again, only to have April wave at him, allowing Brian to hit a middle rope Russian legsweep for the pin.

Rating: D+. Lawler just isn’t working for me in this company. He’s great in Memphis but that’s a very different world than almost anywhere else in wrestling. At the end of the day there’s just no interest in this stupid April storyline and it isn’t getting any better at all. Young never did much for me either.

We recap Sonny Siaki and AJ Styles attacking an injured Jerry Lynn a few weeks and costing him a match against Ron Killings. The beating continued in the back until Jerry was locked in a case. Jerry wanted revenge the next week but was sent through a barricade, forcing him to vacate the X-Division Title.

Here’s Jerry Lynn with something to say. He takes responsibility for his knee injury last week, but next week he won’t take any responsibility for what he does to Sonny Siaki. He’s heard all this stuff before and Siaki is everything that’s wrong with wrestling today. Sonny hasn’t earned any respect at all and doesn’t want to, so next week Jerry will beat the respect into him.

This brings out Siaki who says Jerry is right because he doesn’t respect anyone. He won’t be a jobber like Lynn for the next fifteen years though. Siaki comes to the ring and puts Lynn in a leg lock until some jobbers come out and pull him off. Jerry gets up and goes after Siaki in the corner. The wrestlers and security combined can’t hold him back. Siaki won’t be held back either as the brawl continues. NWA officials come out for the real break up.

Earlier today Tenay talked to Sean Waltman about Waltman being X-Division before there was an X-Division. Waltman is flattered and says the X-Division is about excitement and proving who is the best pound for pound wrestler in the world. Tenay asks if Waltman can have the same impact here that he had in the WWF and WCW. Waltman wants to know if he means the positive or negative impact. He’s a wrestler and has been for fifteen years and that’s why he’s here. Waltman doesn’t have any problems with AJ Styles but he’s ready for the match tonight.

Sonny Siaki vs. Jorge Estrada

Jorge charges to the ring and the fight is on fast. A kick to the ribs hunches Siaki over, allowing Jorge to hit a spinning springboard Fameasser for two. Sonny throws him into the corner but gets caught with a springboard moonsault for another near fall. A suplex puts Estrada on the floor and a pumphandle slam keeps him down.

Back in and Siaki falls down trying a slam but it hurts Jorge for some reason. A double clothesline puts both guys down but it’s Estrada up first with a rolling fireman’s carry and Lionsault for two. Back up and Siaki nails a clothesline for two but Sonny rolls to the floor for a breather. Estrada goes to the top but dives onto the barricade by mistake. Siaki nails the Siakalypse (reverse Cross Rhodes) for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here and it was actually built up over the last few weeks to set things in motion. In other words, there was an actual story and I cared about the match as a result. Siaki and Estrada aren’t the most interesting guys in the world but they’re good for high flying and that’s all they needed to do here.

Jerry Lynn comes out and goes after Siaki until officials run out to break up the big brawl.

Derek Wylde vs. Ace Steel

Steel has Mortimer Plumtree in his corner and is most famous for training CM Punk and Colt Cabana. He has some freaky looking eyes on the way to the ring. Wylde takes him down by the arm to start before rolling out of a wristlock and sending Ace into the ropes. Derek gets his legs under Ace’s arms and pulls him out to the floor before taking him down with a hurricanrana. Back in and Ace rams him into the corner before hitting a nice running dropkick. A superplex drops Wylde and sets up a HORRIBLE looking Widow’s Peak (the Twist of Kane, whatever that means) to give Ace the pin.

Rating: D+. This one didn’t do much for me. Steel is a guy I’ve never been able to get into and Wylde was your generic indy guy who does high flying stuff. This felt like more filler stuff but at least Plumtree wanting to take over the company with his army of guys is a story. It’s not much but it’s better than nothing at least.

Bruce/Jeff Jarrett vs. Hermie Sadler/BG James

Let’s get this over with. Sadler is a NASCAR driver and this is about whether he’s a real athlete or not. Before the match, BG calls Bruce a shemale and a homo but is still the face here. Jarrett says Hermie should be in the Last and the Furious after his recent performance. After those lame or offensive jokes, Jarrett and BG get things going.

A forearm puts Jarrett down and it’s off to Bruce for the usual gestures and “comedy” spots you would expect from Bruce’s gimmick. Sadler comes in as well and is easily taken down with a drop toehold. A bad looking headlock has Bruce in trouble and it’s back to BG who loads up a low blow but thinks there’s nothing there to hurt.

Bruce likes the pumphandle slam too much so BG lets him go. BG is in trouble due to some forearms to the face and knee drops to the chest before it’s back to Jarrett who gets punched in the face. The shaky knee drop gets no reaction and everything breaks down. BG and Jarrett fight up the ramp and Hermie gets two off a backdrop. Brian Lawler lays James out with a trashcan as Sadler counters a sunset flip into the pin on Bruce.

Rating: D-. Looking back, characters like Bruce come off as much more offensive than anything else. The joke isn’t funny and hasn’t been funny for years. Sadler didn’t add anything to this other than some very low level celebrity status, but the match was terrible either way.

Jarrett lays out Bruce with the Stroke post match.

Norman Smiley vs. Ron Harris

The announcers talk about how long it’s been since we’ve seen Norman, which is true as he hasn’t had a match in eleven weeks. Yeah that’s not a very long time overall, but it’s over three fourths of the time TNA has been around. Harris shoves him down to start and shoves him again to break up a cravate. Back up and some clotheslines drop Harris for a few seconds but a slam wears Norman out. Ron doesn’t take kindly to a Big Wiggle attempt and kicks Smiley in the face. Some whips across the ring and a big side slam get two for Harris but a half nelson slam is good for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a squash but at the end of the day there’s nothing interesting about Ron Harris. We know it’s setting up a reunion or showdown with his brother, but neither of those options are going to mean anything. They don’t have characters or anything other than they used to be an uninteresting tag team, but we’re supposed to care?

Ron goes after Norman again post match but Smiley fights back. Don Harris makes the save but stops Ron from attacking Smiley anymore.

Tag Team Titles: Chris Harris/James Storm vs. Rick Michaels/Chris Michaels

For the save of clarity, only Chris Michaels will be referred to as Chris. Harris and Storm are defending and undefeated. Storm runs over Rick with a shoulder to start before sending him out to the floor. Rick goes outside as well before Harris backdrops Storm onto both of them. Harris dives over the ropes to take both Michaels out in a nice dive of his own.

Back in and the challengers take over with some double teaming to Storm with kicks and whips into the corner. A nice dropkick gets two for Rick but Storm escapes over to the corner for the hot tag to Harris. Everything breaks down again with Harris getting two off a cross body.

Harris hits a Cactus Clothesline to send Chris out to the floor, meaning Storm’s reverse tornado DDT gets no count. Chris gets back in and nails Storm for two but Harris knocks Chris to the floor. Storm is sent off the top and into the barricade, allowing the challengers to hit a neckbreaker/top rope elbow combination for two on Harris. Storm takes out Rick, allowing Harris to hit a quick Catatonic on Chris to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. This was probably match of the night so far but that’s not really saying much. The LONG segment at the end with all four guys fighting took away from the good stuff earlier on. It would have worked had there been another five minutes in the middle there but it felt rushed otherwise. Also having two guys named Michaels but emphasizing they weren’t related got annoying. Just say they’re cousins or something and the team will feel more natural.

The Hot Shots attack the champions post match to set up some new challengers. Rick and Chris help with the beatdown as this goes on too long.

X-Division Title: AJ Styles vs. Syxx-Pac

AJ debuts Mortimer Plumtree as his new manager to continue Plumtree’s attempt to try to take over the division. Syxx-Pac is defending and I could have sworn the announcers said this was to be a ladder match or a three way with Low Ki also involved. Feeling out process to start and they trade armdrags to no one’s advantage. Styles grabs a headlock and throws the first right hand as things speed up a bit.

Syxx sends him into the corner and kicks Styles down but AJ bails to avoid the Bronco Buster. Back in and Styles nails a kick to the ribs and crotches Pac against the post to really take over. Plumtree gets in some choking of his own behind the referee’s back, setting up an AJ chinlock. Back up and they chop it out before the champion is sent through the ropes to the floor. Styles follows him out with a HUGE flip dive and the fans aren’t sure if they should cheer or not.

Back in and we hit another chinlock until AJ gets two off a Fameasser. Spiral Tap (called a twisting move by Tenay) misses and Pac nails some big spinwheel kicks to the face. Pac goes up but gets dropkicked out of the air for two. Styles tries his own Bronco Buster but gets kicked to the floor in a nice counter.

A BIG dive takes AJ down as well and they head back inside with both guys in trouble. AJ’s discus lariat takes the referee down by mistake so there’s no one to count a pin off the X-Factor. Plumtree comes in for a distraction as a second referee comes in. Pac hammers away in the corner and shoves away the second referee for the DQ.

Rating: B-. Lame ending to a good match. Plumtree wasn’t much of a manager but it was a surprise for AJ. That being said, it would have been better to have AJ win the title here if you’re going to have him debut a manager. This was the kind of match the show needed after a VERY bad first seventy five minutes.

Don West hypes up next week’s show as only he can.

Earlier today Tenay sat down with Curt Hennig for an introduction. Seriously, they think the fans need an introduction to Curt Hennig? Curt says he’s been successful everywhere so he can get one here too.

NWA World Title: Ron Killings vs. Curt Hennig

Before the match Killings, the champion of course, asks when TNA officials are going to stop hiding behind their titles. He doesn’t like all these people making decisions and trying to downplay minority wrestlers like himself. Tonight, Hennig’s blood is on their hands instead of his. He cranks up the evil by saying everyone’s mama is overrated. Hennig comes out and rants about respect before getting in for the opening bell.

Feeling out process to start with both guys shoving each other into the corner. Hennig takes him down into a front facelock before they head outside. Killings backdrops him onto the announce table and sends him over the barricade for some right hands. Back in with Truth in control as Mortimer Plumtree, Ron Harris and AJ Styles watch from the stage. Truth gets in a shot to the eye and kicks Hennig’s knee out for two. Hennig comes back with a slam but the referee gets knocked down in the process.

Mr. Wrestling 3 sneaks in again and hammers away on Hennig, drawing in some other wrestlers to get rid of him. Security and officials come out for the big pull apart as the bell hasn’t rung yet. Everyone gets out and the match actually continues…..until Truth throws the referee down again. He also nails Jeremy Borash and Bullet Bob Armstrong before grabbing a chair. Armstrong says either get back in there and wrestle or get counted out and be stripped of the belt. Jarrett sneaks in with a low blow to Hennig, giving Truth the pin.

Rating: D. What was the point in having the match continue if they’re just going to have it go on like that? I’m assuming it sets up Hennig vs. Jarrett, but they could have set that up a bunch of other ways. Truth going nuts is fine, but have him against someone more interesting than Bob Armstrong.

Overall Rating: D. Somehow this was an improvement over last week’s mess. Things picked up a bit near the end but the rest of the show was just such a mess. I like the X-Division stuff they’re doing but the main event scene is awful right now. The Jarrett/James/Sadler nonsense is bad enough but then we have Truth ranting about how stupid the corporate structure is.

The problem with that: I totally agree with him (save for the racist stuff). I have no interest in hearing about this tradition and such with guys like Bullet Bob Armstrong from never meant anything on a national stage. All that being said, this was a slight improvement over last week and they’ve got some stuff going with potential for the future. This show was much more boring than bad, and that’s at least a step in the right direction.

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This one is going to kill you: it’s Samoa Joe.

Joe would debut in September 1999 in California. While still an unknown, he would get a WWF developmental contract, leading to a one off appearance in the WWF against Essa Rios on Jakked, a syndicated show, in February of 2001.

Essa Rios vs. Samoa Joe

To really date the show, Coach and Michael Hayes preview an XFL game. Joe snapmares him down but gets caught in a quick powerslam for two. Essa sends Joe to the outside and nails a great looking flip dive over the corner to land on Joe. Back in and Joe’s powerbomb is countered into a DDT, setting up the great looking moonsault for the pin.

Rating: D+. Rios’ dives looked great but Joe didn’t look like much out there. To be fair though he was still new to what he was doing. Unfortunately the WWF didn’t see the potential in him and Jim Ross told him he didn’t have a future in wrestling and Joe was released soon after.

Joe would win the ROH World Title in March of 2003 and hold if for over a year and a half. During this reign his most famous series would be against CM Punk, including what might be ROH’s most acclaimed match at Joe vs. Punk II: Joe vs. Punk II. From October 16, 2004.

ROH World Title: Samoa Joe vs. CM Punk

Punk is blonde here. The fans are split as Joe is the most popular guy in the company but it’s Punk’s hometown. They shake hands and here we go. It’s weird to see Joe using power moves. The idea is that Joe proved he could go long distances and now Punk needs another idea to fight Joe. Feeling out process to start with not much of note going on so far. They go into the corner and Joe breaks clean to tick off the crowd.

Joe hooks a hammerlock and into an armbar. Punk takes him to the corner and it’s another clean break, almost shocking everyone. Punk cartwheels out of a wristlock and Joe is like boy please and takes him down into a camel clutch. Man and he cranks on that thing. He’s channeling his inner humbler. Punk rolls out into a headlock which he used a lot in the first match. They have a ton of time to work with here so this is fine.

In a nice looking move, Joe has Punk in a Pedigree position but they’re on the mat and it’s a submission hold. I like the plug from the commentator as he talks about the shopping site where there are DVDs and all that jazz. That’s all normal and fine but at the end of it he says “Ok we got that out of the way. It’s important but I want to get back to the match.” I don’t know why but I found that really refreshing.

This has been almost all on the mat or in a technical style and I’m digging it. Punk has used a bunch of headlocks here but the idea is he used that in the first match to wear Joe down and had success with it. That’s some higher level psychology and the announcers did their part by explaining it in like two sentences. See it’s not hard. Even a belly to back suplex can’t get the hold broken.

They exchange shoulder blocks and Punk is getting fired up. We hit the strikes and Punk speeds things WAY up, grabbing a rollup and Joe bails for a bit which stuns the announcers. Back to the mat game and man are they fast down there. After Punk chills for a bit on the floor he tries a test of strength because….uh…..why would you try that against Joe? They fire off chops in the corner and while it’s not exactly Flair vs. Steamboat it’s not bad.

They go to the corner now and Punk walks the ropes to start in on the arm. Joe’s arm gets worked on for a long while and now it’s back to the headlock. This has been going on about half an hour now and it’s pretty solid stuff, almost like a chess match. Out to the floor and of course Punk is in over his head out there. Joe is a big power brawler to go with his submission stuff here so he was really more like Benoit actually.

Over to the corner and Joe fires off some face washes but Punk avoids the running boot. Now Punk washes Joe’s face in the other corner. Nice little touch there. Foley is watching from the crowd. Thankfully they don’t cut to him and miss part of the match. A driving knee from the top (knee on the back of Joe’s head and Punk drove him down) gets two. Joe grabs a very modified STF out of nowhere and DANG. They were up on their knees but then Joe bent him back so that Punk was laying on his back but his legs were underneath him. FREAKING OW MAN!!!

Punk goes up but Joe just walks away like only he does. I love that realism thing. Delayed vertical suplex (about twenty seconds) gets two for Joe. Punk goes for the arm but Joe cuts the knees out and hooks a Boston Crab. Joe fires off a bunch of kicks to the head but Punk fires off some forearms. Joe is like whatever and pops him in the face for two. This time Joe gets the Facewashes and the running boot.

Punk finally gets a boot up in the corner and then a rana to the floor. A suicide dive puts both guys down and Punk gets control back. Punk, ever the jerk, hits Joe’s Ole Kick on the floor. He tries another rana off the apron but Joe catches him in a powerbomb position and spins Punk around into the barricade. Now Joe fires off the Ole but Punk blocks. They slug it out on the floor and this time the Ole hits.

After a quick skirmish in the ring they go back to the floor…..and the announcers walk off. They say they want to watch it as fans and say the match speaks for itself. Joe gets a DDT onto the apron and I’m assuming the fanboy announcers are pleased with that. Were they paying them by the hour and run out of money or something? Back in and a spear gets a very fast two.

We’re at 45 minutes. A top rope splash misses for the fat man and they do the slugging it out from their knees spot. A snap powerslam gets two for Joe and it’s off to a cross armbreaker. Punk just can’t get away from that, even today. A big boot gets two for Punk. There’s someone at ringside but since the announcers ran out for guacamole and gram crackers, we’re on our own as to who he is.

Punk gets a tornado DDT and the Anaconda Vice which he lets go for no apparent reason. Joe takes over with a clothesline and follows it up with a pair of busters (gut and brain) for two each. Joe does his powerbomb into a crab into the STF into the crossface sequence. Sunset flip gets two for Punk as does a kick to the head. They do the whole exchange submission finishers and Punk winds up putting the Clutch on Joe.

That gets him nowhere and a double clothesline puts them both down. Two Pepsi Plunges are blocked into a superplex by Joe for a delayed two. Joe sets for the MuscleBuster but Punk goes insane pounding on Joe’s back to break it up. Another Plunge is attempted but Joe counters into the MuscleBuster….and that’s the time limit as Punk is out cold. Uh…shouldn’t the match end with Joe out cold and Punk needing 5 more seconds to win the title?

Rating: B. It’s good, but the feeling I got here was “we have to have a classic”, not “this was a classic”. The first 15 minutes of this were all about the headlock and wearing Joe down and all that jazz, but it never went anywhere after that. The last half an hour or so didn’t really have much drama for my taste.

The problem was they were going for regular moves instead of trying to finish. The problem with that is that you have Joe and Punk who have already gone an hour before and you know that’s not going to finish either guy. This was reminiscent of Hart vs. Michaels, where a lot could have been condensed and the match would have improved a lot. It’s still good, but it’s not the epic classic that it’s supposed to be.

Joe would join TNA in 2005, making his debut at Slammiversary 2005.

Sonjay Dutt vs. Samoa Joe

This is Joe’s in ring debut. We hear about Ring of Honor which is a name you don’t often hear in this company. Joe is still relatively fit here. He goes off on Sonjay in the corner and shrugs off a clothesline. Sonjay runs into the release Rock Bottom in the corner with a SICK landing. We get the Facewash in the corner and the running boot. All Joe so far.

A legsweep sets up the backsplash for two. Dutt finally gets out of the way and sends Joe to the floor. There’s a big flip dive to take the Samoan out and back in a springboard dropkick gets two. 450 gets the same. A second attempt misses and Joe hits the powerslam to set up the MuscleBuster and the Clutch for the tap.

Rating: C. This was a total squash, which would be the first of many. Joe wouldn’t lose until December of 2006 when they had to bring in Kurt Angle to give him a real challenge. The fans were into him as no one of that size could move as fast as he could and no one quite has since. Pretty effective debut.

Joe would enter and win the Super X Cup tournament, defeating AJ Styles in the finals at Sacrifice 2005. This earned him a three way title match at Unbreakable, with AJ joining him in challenging champion Christopher Daniels.

X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles vs. Christopher Daniels

Daniels is the longest reigning champion ever at this point, AJ is a four time champion and Joe is undefeated. This is TNA’s greatest match ever so let’s see if it holds up. AJ and Joe team up to beat down Daniels to start which is kind of a surprising move. Joe kicks him HARD in the back and AJ does the same thing. It turns into a contest and I think Joe wins by a hair. Daniels gets up but Joe kicks him in the face. Cool sequence.

AJ grabs a fast rollup on Joe and we’re ready to get going. They trade pinfall attempts so fast that I can’t type them until Joe hooks a modified Rings of Saturn. Daniels breaks it up and kicks AJ down for no cover. Joe chops the champ and hits a standing enziguri to knock him to the floor. AJ takes Joe down but Daniels is back in to take over on Styles, getting two. Joe chops them both in the corner but Daniels fires back with chops of his own.

Styles headscissors both guys down into opposite corners and fires off kicks at Joe. Joe is like screw that and suplexes him down overhead style. There’s the Facewash to Styles but Daniels breaks up the running kick to the face. Daniels hits a springboard moonsault onto Joe on the floor but you know AJ has to top him, so he hits a springboard shooting star to take both guys down. He rolls Joe back in for two and things slow down a tiny bit.

Actually scratch that as Styles hits the drop down/dropkick combo for two. Daniels comes back in again and monkey flips AJ at Joe but AJ twists in mid air into a rana on the fat man. Daniels O’Connor rolls Styles for two and then launches him over the top and out to the floor. A flying knee sends Joe into the corner and Daniels slaps him in the face. Joe will have none of that and slaps Daniels back but Daniels rolls him up for two.

Joe counters the rollup into the Clutch so Styles busts out Spiral Tap to break up the hold. That gets two on both guys and Daniels sends Styles back to the floor. An STO puts Joe down but AJ breaks up the BME. I feel like I’m talking to a 3 year old after that last exchange with all the spelling. Daniels gets caught in the Tree of Woe and AJ kicks away, but Joe splashes AJ into Daniels. A running dropkick to the face breaks the Tree and Daniels is out.

The running big boot that Joe does knocks AJ’s head into Tallahassee somewhere and the backsplash gets two. Daniels comes back out of nowhere and hits the Death Valley Driver on Joe. Everyone is down until Daniels covers Joe for two. AJ gets sent to the floor and both he and Daniels miss moonsaults. They slug it out so Joe hits a corkscrew plancha to take both guys down. The fans are losing their minds over this stuff. Back in and Daniels breaks up the MuscleBuster but Styles goes up too. AJ and Daniels fight on the top so Joe backdrops both of them down at the same time.

Joe gets up first and he looks MAD. He and AJ slug it out with AJ taking over but Joe slugs him right back and hits a big old German release suplex to take over. There’s the MuscleBuster but Daniels comes in with the belt. He charges at Joe but the Samoan hits a snap powerslam to cut that off. Joe picks the belt up but Daniels kicks it into his face. Daniels and AJ slug it out and that just feels appropriate. A blue thunder bomb out of nowhere gets two on Styles.

Release Rock Bottom puts AJ down and the BME gets two as Joe makes the save. Daniels puts a Dragon Sleeper on Joe and hooks the Last Rites (rolling cutter which he didn’t use that often) to send Joe to the floor again. AJ bounces back up and hits the moonsault into the reverse DDT for two. Styles goes up but Daniels hits a palm strike to stop him. Daniels superplexes him down but he can’t cover. Joe comes in and covers both guys for two.

Joe focuses on Daniels and hits his powerbomb into the Boston Crab into the STF sequence so he can call a LONG spot to Daniels. Daniels (wearing a wedding ring) gets the rope so Joe beats up AJ a bit more. He fires off forearms but AJ snaps off the Pele to take over again. The Rack into a neckbreaker gets two for Styles but Daniels is back up. AJ hits a sunset flip into the Clash but Joe makes the save at two. Daniels ducks a charging Joe to send him tot he floor. AJ and Daniels slug it out and Daniels tries the Angel’s Wings. AJ counters into a bridging backdrop and stays on top for the pin and the title.

Rating: A+. Yeah that’s the easy answer but there’s no real other option to go with here. This was about twenty three minutes long and the longest they go without action is maybe 20 seconds. These three have incredible chemistry together and it was a great example of what smaller guys can do. It’s not the best match in TNA history by a mile but it’s the best match by a few feet. Great match.

Joe would get a one on one title shot against Styles at Turning Point 2005.

X-Division Title: Samoa Joe vs. AJ Styles

AJ is defending and Joe is undefeated. They’ve fought before, I believe at Sacrifice. Joe has the bloody towel which is still awesome. AJ goes right at Joe as soon as the bell rings, knocking him into the corner where Joe is just covering up. AJ ducks his head though and Joe gets in a kick to the chest. The drop down dropkick knocks Joe silly though and the champ takes over again.

Joe misses a charge and for some reason they have a stalemate. AJ has that fire in his eyes here and that means this is going to be awesome. They chop it out and Joe fires of HARD kicks to take over. A running kick sends Styles to the floor and the fire is gone all of a sudden. AJ comes in first but can’t suplex Joe over the top. Instead he guillotines him on the top rope, sending Joe to the floor.

Joe pulls the feet out and spins him around in a powerbomb position to send Styles into the barricade. SICK impact. Styles gets sent into the barricade and a running boot sends AJ flying. Back in and AJ is knocked into the corner and a kick to the chest puts him down. Backsplash keeps Styles down and gets two. A chinlock runs through a few seconds and it’s Facewash time. AJ blocks one of them though and fires off some rights. That gets him nowhere though as Joe kicks him HARD in the face and Styles’ lights are out.

Styles is knocked to the apron but he manages a kind of enziguri but the springboard forearm is countered into a powerbomb into a Boston Crab and then a modified one with AJ’s legs in a powerbomb position. AJ kicks his way out of it and goes to the corner. Joe misses a charge and goes to the floor. The running Shooting Star dive (LOVE that move and it’s called the Fosburry Flop) takes Joe down. Springboard forearm to the back of the head gets two.

Joe’s release German is escaped into the moonsault DDT for two. Powerslam gets two for the Samoan. Joe fires off kicks and Styles says kick him harder. Joe does and AJ crumples up in the corner. AJ comes back again after some right hands and kicks Joe down. AJ’s mouth is busted but I think we’re in Rope-A-Dope land. He loads up the Clash but powerbombs Joe instead for two. That was impressive.

Styles’ eyes say “what more do I have to do” and Joe KILLS him with a clothesline. That only gets one and Joe looks stunned. A SICK double underhook powerbomb gets two for Joe and Styles screams at him. Joe hooks a standing Clutch but AJ escapes and hits the Pele for no cover. AJ takes him to the corner but has to escape a top rope MuscleBuster. Instead AJ pulls him to the mat and then hits the Clash…..for two. The champ tries an O’Connor Roll but gets caught in the Clutch and Styles passes out to give Joe the title for the first time.

Rating: B+. Styles may not bring out the best in Joe, but Joe brings out the best in Styles. This was telling a great story with Styles wanting to hold on as long as he could and tire Joe out but in the end, Joe was just too much for him. The match was great, but when they threw in Daniels it made things excellent. Very good match here though and the fire in Styles was great.

Joe would soon turn face and join Sting in the main event picture. This would lead to Joe vs. NWA World Champion Jeff Jarrett in a fans’ revenge strap match at No Surrender 2006.

Samoa Joe vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jarrett has a bunch of shirts and pads on. Young pops up but can’t find Sting. Jeff sends Young into the rafters, because Young has checked all of Universal Studios EXCEPT THE PLACE STING ALWAYS HANGS OUT IN. It’s a regular match other than the lumberjacks. Joe, still the hottest thing in the company, uses his stuff that comes from all over and beats the champion half to death to start.

Jarrett is sent to the floor but he jets back in to avoid pain. Joe starts taking some of the layers of clothes Jeff has on. The better to eat you with my dear. After a few minutes of getting dominated, Jeff manages to send Joe to the floor where the fans won’t touch him. Jarrett gets one of the straps somehow and beats on Joe with it. The fans all get behind Joe and after a minute or so of Jarrett, the world champion mind you, being in control, Joe moves out of the way of a cross body and momentum shifts.

See this is the problem: there’s no real reason for Jarrett to have a chance here because Joe has to beat him as the streak can’t go down on a throwaway show here. In short, Jarrett was a lame duck champion that shouldn’t have had the title since Slammiversary like he had. You have Sting win the title there then have Jarrett keep winning through the same cheating. Joe gets this match here and then goes on to streak vs. title at BFG. That of course would mean listening to the audience and we can’t have that and Joe wouldn’t get the title for a year and a half.

Jarrett gets the strap back and tries to choke Joe so the fans run in and get shots on the back of Jeff. Joe grabs the Clutch but Jeff gets his foot on the ropes. The guitar is brought in and Jarrett gets a Stroke onto the guitar but that’s just the world champion’s finisher onto a weapon. Why should that get three?

And no I’m not complaining like I usually would here by saying Jeff should beat him. I’m saying Jarrett was a horrible champion and shouldn’t have held the title here at all. Joe counters a middle rope Stroke and with a Musclebuster he pins the world champion, earning a spot in a hardcore match with Spike Dudley at the biggest show of the year.

Rating: D. The match was bad on top of how freaking stupid it was. They had no idea what the point of the story was because Joe was dominant and looked awesome here while Jarrett, the champion looked like a jobber to the stars. Not a good match and one of the dumbest things I’ve seen in TNA in a very long time. This started my hatred of things in this company. Also, Ultimate X should have gone on last.

Somehow this didn’t put Joe in the title hunt but he would get a nice parting gift. Immediately after the match, Kurt Angle would debut for TNA. Angle said he wanted the best and would make his in ring debut against Joe at Genesis 2006.

Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

The fans immediately chant this is awesome, which is kind of annoying. Feeling out process to start and Kurt goes straight for the ankle. Joe blocks the hold pretty easily and pounds him down onto the ropes. Kurt snaps off the belly to belly and clotheslines Joe to the outside. Joe grabs him in a powerbomb position, pulls him to the outside and swings him into the barricade.

Back in Angle misses a charge, hitting the post shoulder first. Out to the floor and Joe hits the suicide elbow before sending Angle into the steps. Pretty one sided so far. Kurt’s all nice and busted now. That’s a good thing too as he had a big annoying bandage on his head before that. Joe goes right for the cut and rips away at it. Powerslam gets two. Angle gets in some uppercuts but walks into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two.

Kurt’s head is flowing very solid here. Joe loads up the MuscleBuster but Kurt comes back with a front facelock into a tornado DDT, getting two. They slug it out and Joe misses a charge, setting up the Rolling Germans. He tries to release the last one but drops him on his face instead. That gets two and Kurt is all fired up. Joe armdrags his way out of the Slam and hits the MuscleBuster for two.

Angle rolls out of the Clutch and hits the Slam for a very quick two. There go the straps and he hooks the ankle lock. Joe rolls through but can’t break the hold. He pulls Angle down into the Clutch and Kurt is in trouble, but he manages to grab the foot and hook the ankle lock again. The fans are WAY into this. Joe rolls out to send Kurt into the middle rope, but he walks into another Olympic Slam. Kurt puts the straps back up so he can take them back down. Oh MAN he’s serious here. Angle hooks the ankle lock with the grapevine and Joe has to tap.

Rating: B. That’s it? Don’t get me wrong the match was good but this was only about thirteen and a half minutes. Why in the world would you make this match run that short? There are over six minutes left in the show and they cut it that short? It couldn’t be Kurt’s cardio as he was a full time guy less than six months earlier. Good match, but WAY too short.

This was the start of a feud between the two, eventually setting up a winner take all match. By that I mean the winner of the match would be TNA World, IWGP World, X-Division and sole owner of the Tag Team Titles. From Hard Justice 2007.

TNA World Title/X-Division Title/Tag Titles/IWGP World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

Kurt is all messed up mentally and drops one of the belts on the way to the ring. So it’s high school sophomore Kurt here. Joe has his Samoan dancers here. Karen is nowhere to be seen at the bell. Feeling out process to start and Angle is knocked to the floor. Here are Karen and that other dude. Nothing of note so far in the opening three minutes or so.

Joe tries a sunset flip and Kurt gets his tights pulled down for a Ric Flair imitation. Karen throws champagne in Kurt’s eyes. Back in a running knee gets two for Joe. Joe uses the Facewash in the corner and Kurt is in big trouble. The American hits a German on the Samoan to put both guys down. Off to a chinlock as this isn’t much of a match. It’s certainly below what these two usually do.

Here are the rolling Germans. Joe grabs one of his own and they slug it out. Snap powerslam gets two. Kurt goes to the second rope but Joe snaps off a wicked enziguri for two. The Slam is countered so Joe slaps Angle a few times. Powerslam gets two. MuscleBuster is loaded up but Kurt rolls through into the ankle lock which is countered into the Clutch which is countered into the ankle lock again.

They speed things up and the Angle Slam gets two. The fans are finally into something on this show and Angle runs the corner for the belly to belly, getting two. The moonsault misses but it would have been a headbutt at best anyway. MuscleBuster gets two. Joe grabs the Clutch again but Angle bites his fingers to break it. Off to the ankle lock which Joe counters back into the Clutch.

Angle gets his foot on the ropes and there’s the ref bump. Joe grabs the choke again and Angle taps. Ever the idiot since he’s the face here, Joe lets go of the hold since there’s no referee. Karen grabs a chair but, say it with me, IT’S A SWERVE!!!! Karen slides it to Kurt who clocks Joe with it for the pin and all the titles. Give me a break.

Rating: B. It’s good but when you have 2007 Joe vs. Angle, you’re expecting more than a Russo finish. I mean, it’s not bad but the swerve was predictable because it was exactly what you expected to happen. It was the least logical option given the storyline leading up to this so that was always going to be the ending. The first ten minutes of this were weak but the ending was a lot better, other than the swerve of course.

One more Angle vs. Joe match, but it’s a big one. From Lockdown 2008.

TNA World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

Now the first thing you notice is that this is more or less designed as a half MMA fight and half wrestling match. Now I get the idea here as they want to spread out the audience, but this isn’t something I can get into. I’m not saying it’s a bad idea, but it’s just not the greatest idea in the world to me. It’s new though so I have to give them credit for not just doing the same match.

They use a lot of MMA techniques and it’s actually working pretty well. They have Frank Trigg on commentary which is a good idea as he offers a perspective that we wouldn’t usually get, much like Tenay used to do with the cruiserweights in WCW. This is about seventeen minutes of primarily submission based stuff and while it’s not my style, it’s certainly great stuff.

You can tell there’s been a lot of training done for both guys to incorporate a lot of new submissions. In a CREEPY moment, Joe gets a crossface on Angle and the fans chant Joe’s gonna kill you. I don’t think it was intentional or anything, but that’s rather chilling. After a ton of submission attempts, and I mean at least 12 apiece, Joe hits the Muscle Buster to get the pin. Massive posing and celebrating ends the show.

Rating: A-. That might be a bit high but after what I went through with the idiocy earlier, this was gold for me. It’s a completely different style but it worked exactly like they wanted it to so I can’t complain at all. This was named match of the year in TNA and I can buy that.

I’m glad this was a one off thing though as it’s not something I’d want to become the norm. Either way, this was a great way to put the belt on Joe, but because it came two freaking years too late, no one cared and he was a boring champion.

Joe would defend the title over the next few months before dropping it to Sting at Bound For Glory. This led to something resembling a heel turn for Sting as he started the Main Event Mafia. Joe would get all violent, paint a fake tattoo on his face and lead the TNA Frontline in the war against the Mafia, leading to Lethal Lockdown at Lockdown 2009.

Team Angle vs. Team Jarrett

It’s Lethal Lockdown, which is WarGames but after everyone is in there is a roof with weapons attached lowered and we only have one ring. You have two teams of four (thank GOODNESS!) people each. Each team sends in a man for five minutes and then there’s a coin toss. The winning team sends in a man for a 2-1 advantage for two minutes. After those two minutes are up the team that lost the toss sends in their second man to tie us up. Two minutes later the winning team goes up 3-2. You alternate every two minutes and then lower the roof after everyone is in.

Angle vs. Daniels to start us off here. Daniels has been back in TNA for a total of four days. Daniels actually gets him down to start and holds him there. Angle realizes he’s Angle and takes care of that. This is a slow paced start here with both guys working on the mat. That’s not bad though and it’s working for the most part as they’re solid there.

Team Angle has the advantage apparently which might have been determined already. TNA does that on occasion which makes sense at least. Daniels gets the Koji Clutch out of nowhere with about 5 seconds to go. I know I didn’t say much in there but it was just dull stuff. Granted that could be due to Daniels. Booker is in second and drills Daniels, who apparently was surprised. I guess the music, the clock and the BIG FREAKING WRESTLER didn’t get his attention.

Angle gets back up after about a minute and a half and it’s the big beatdown with about 45 seconds left until we tie it up again. For some reason Booker took forever to come into the match so they only got about 90 seconds in there. AJ ties us up. He took the Legends Title from Booker last month so there’s your reason for him being there. AJ just looks freaking awesome there, running in with his eyes looking awesome. I think I’m bordering on a man crush here.

AJ and Daniels destroy the Mafia with sweet double team stuff. They always had a chemistry together which again I have to put on AJ for bringing up Daniels. I am not a fan of his at all and I don’t get his appeal. His style is way too out there for me and it’s how ROH tends to work. Not a fan of it. Steiner is in third meaning Nash will be the final guy. Yeah I’m stunned too that he has the least to do.

Steiner Lines all around. Daniels takes a big old suplex but AJ takes what Steiner calls the Frankensteiner now even though that simply isn’t what it is anymore. Joe is third to add up the holy trinity of the X Division…and there’s no Joe. He’s getting advice from his mentor, who would turn out to be Taz. While he’s standing there though his partners are getting destroyed.

Ah here’s Joe, complete with the “tattoo” on his face. Steiner vs. Joe is a sad sight for some reason. Having only eight people in here is a VERY nice perk as the ten that most people have is way too many. When you had two rings in WCW that was ok as there was more than enough room.

Nash comes in last and Joe FREAKS on him, not even letting him into the ring. And so much for that as he drills Joe and gets in anyway. Ok everyone that is in the match so far is in there. Best Moonsault Ever to Nash but we can’t cover yet. Not that it matters as it’s not like Nash would let Daniels get a pin on him anyway. Here’s Jarrett to tie us up and get us to the final part of the match.

He cleans house in his powder blue tights as the roof with weapons on it is lowered. Basically now it turns into who can get out of the cage for the big spot first. Because TNA is stupid, we go to a SIX WAY SCREEN SPLIT. Since there is a total of one ring, they realize this is stupid and go to a regular shot. Angle has managed to find a hole in the roof and is on top. AJ follows him so we get a little breathing room in the ring.

AJ vs. Angle squaring off on top of the cage is kind of cool looking. Angle tries to suplex him off but it gets blocked due to it being like deadly. Angle gets back in the ring after a bit and hits the Slam on Jarrett. AJ is up on top of the cage and is just like screw it and dives through the top of the cage, breaking it and landing on the Mafia. When I say on the Mafia I mean they all back up so they don’t have to catch him and let him crash. Nice guys.

Joe goes off until Booker takes him down and spins up. I hate the name so I don’t feel like typing it. Jarrett swings a chair at Booker and hits AJ who is somehow still alive after that jump. Joe gets all ticked off at him but gets caught in the Slam because he’s not paying attention. Angel’s Wings gets two on Angle. Basically this is just everyone hits big moves until Jarrett gets the guitar and sets to hit AJ but drills Booker like he’s supposed to and AJ gets the pin.

Rating: B. Pretty solid stuff here with the four people per team DEFINITELY being a good idea. This wasn’t the best match they’ve ever had with this gimmick but this one worked pretty well. They got into that formula that isn’t very exciting here but the big dive from AJ was a very solid spot, although someone CATCHING HIM would have been nice. Solid stuff here though and DEFINITELY the best match of the night so far.

Not a lot would happen for Joe over the next year, but he would win the World Title shot in Feast or Fired. He would cash in his shot against the now heel AJ Styles at Against All Odds 2010.

TNA World Title: AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe

Remember Bischoff is referee here. Why is he referee? No clue but it’s TNA so that comes with the territory. I love the total lack of tattoo on his face. AJ has a Flair robe. Shoot me now. Ok the hood on it makes it a lot better than I thought. Why in the world are they making AJ a heel here? Seriously, he’s so insanely over and they make a fortune off his merchandise so let’s just throw that away.

He has blonde highlights now too. That’s just great. Fans are WAY behind Joe. There is something awesome about the way JB says “From the Isle of Samoa.” No idea why but I’ve always loved that. As soon as the robe came off AJ got about 10x more awesome. AJ simply doesn’t need Flair to be a heel. The interesting thing here is that Flair and Eric have legit heat. Some of you might not know why though.

Back in 1998, Flair’s son Reid was wrestling in an amateur tournament in North Carolina and Flair was dead set on being there to watch him compete. He gave warning to Bischoff that he would be there and that’s all there was to it. The thing is there was a Thunder, not Nitro or a PPV but THUNDER, that night. Flair, having a thing called common sense, thought that since he was Ric Flair and this was WCW and he gave sufficient warning that he would be able to have a night off.

Bischoff thought otherwise and suspended him. This literally went on for months and the fans reverted back to 1991 and spent the whole show chanting WE WANT FLAIR. So this led to a famous as well as awesome moment where Arn Anderson reformed the Horsemen (adding in Dean Malenko for the first time) and completely unannounced brought out Flair for the first time in about four months in NORTH CAROLINA. What do you think the reaction was?

Naturally Flair gets one of the biggest pops in WCW history and looks like a million bucks and the fans are FREAKING OUT. And of course they had Flair have a heart attack a few weeks later then had Bischoff beat him at Starrcade with a screwjob ending that the fans booed out of the freaking building. How did that company ever make a freaking dime?

The Horsemen were then, you guessed it, fed to the NWO and made to look like jokes while Hogan won the world title from Nash in the Fingerpoke of Doom, because of course having the guy the fans are cheering for like there’s no tomorrow being pushed as a serious character can’t work so let’s just stick with the same stuff that’s made us lose the biggest ratings lead in wrestling history while Austin and Vince are destroying us in the ratings right?

ANYWAY, the point is that Bischoff more or less said that Flair was just one of the wrestlers and that carrying the company for as many years as he did was NOTHING in comparison to guys like Hogan and Savage who came in and tanked the company for two years before the one good idea that Bischoff had (read as stole from two Japanese companies that did the same thing years before the NWO was even heard of) made any money before he ran the company into the freaking ground. Flair was disrespected and the fans chanted WE WANT FLAIR very loudly and Bischoff had to back down and let Flair come back before embarrassing him again.

Oh yeah there’s a PPV here. There is something just freaking awesome about the fans chanting JOE’S GONNA KILL YOU. How can that not get into your head? AJ works on the knee. Ok, that’s fine if he does it a bit but you have AJ Styles in there. Have him use his stuff, not Flair’s as his primary offense. We’re on the floor (I know I’m shocked too) and AJ is trying to suplex Joe which fails more than Flair’s hair.

I’m glad Joe is in the shorts again. They work better for him. Joe counters a top rope hurricanrana and goes aerial and hits kind of an enziguri to the front of the face. Flair goes after the leg. Never mind that it’s the WRONG ONE as AJ had worked on the right leg and Flair went after the left one but whatever. AJ uses an Indian Deathlock and bends back to more or less have his hands like you would for a reverse neckbreaker.

Benoit did that to Booker T once on Thunder and WCW went to a commercial just as he locked it in. Brilliance I tell you, brilliance. There’s the figure four that you knew was coming. Love that snap powerslam Joe does. I know I tend to skip around a lot on my reviewing but here’s my thought on why I don’t just list off play by play: if you wanted that, you could just go watch the match yourself.

Just thought I’d make that clear in case people think I fast forward and just watch pieces of the match. I write out what pops into my head and at times there isn’t much. Doesn’t mean the match is bad or anything but just nothing strikes me about it. And end of random tangent. And Bischoff punches Flair. Ok then. Joe hits the Muscle Buster while this is happening and is ticked off that nothing can be done about it. Joe pulls Bischoff back in and walks into the Pele and the Clash for the pin. Flair demands that Bischoff raise AJ’s hand.

Rating: B+. Solid stuff here but it was missing a little something that I just can’t place. This is another match that you just can’t mess up and they didn’t here. Another solid showing here and it was certainly worthy of being the world title match. AJ just doesn’t work as a heel though.

After getting caught in the middle of the confusing THEY storyline in 2010 and a pretty lame feud with D’Angelo Dinero in early 2011, Joe would go on a losing streak. He tried to break out of it by facing the undefeated Crimson at Slammiversary 2011.

Samoa Joe vs. Crimson

Crimson hits the ring and they slug it out immediately.  The fans think Joe’s Gonna Kill Crimson.  Suicide dive is blocked by a forearm from the floor and there’s a big boot back in the ring by Crimson.  Neckbreaker gets two.  Cravate goes on so Joe gets a bad dragon screw leg whip to take the red dude down.  Crimson hammers away on Joe but walks into a kind of atomic drop sort of a move to the knee.  That was different.

He takes Crimson down with relative ease and there’s a leg bar for a few seconds.  Spinning toe hold by Joe as we go back to the mid 1870s.  Crimson counters into a triangle choke and then an arm bar which gets him nowhere.  T-Bone suplex by Crimson takes Joe down as the fans are trying to get into this.  Double arm DDT gets two.  The fans chant Mercer, which is Crimson’s real name I believe.

Suplex and a clothesline by Joe get two.  Joe goes up to the middle rope for a Rough Ryder for two.  Joe is all frustrated.  “Dang man end this match already before the buffet is empty.”  Powerbomb gets two and it’s off to a half crab.  We get a Gumby reference of all things as the hold stays on.  They slap it out and Crimson gets a spear to take Joe down.  They slug it out again with Crimson knocking him back into the corner.  Now Joe knocks him back into the corner but can’t get the Musclebuster.  Clutch can’t go on either so there’s the Red Sky to end this.

Rating: C+. Pretty good big slugout here and it’s good to see Crimson actually face big time competition for a change.  Pretty good match here with the ending being pretty clear, but a nice test for Crimson nonetheless.  I don’t think Crimson is as great as he’s made out to be, but this worked pretty well for what it was.

Joe’s losing streak would continue through the Bound For Glory Series. However he would get back into things in his specialty: a tournament. This time it was a Wild Card Tag Team Tournament where random teams paired together. Joe and Magnus won the tournament, earning a Tag Team Title shot at Against All Odds 2012.

Tag Titles: Magnus/Samoa Joe vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

Morgan and Joe start things off. Morgan shrugs off some shoulders to start and hits a shoulder of his own for two. Off to Crimson and Magnus with the power guy taking over. Back to Morgan and the champs double team a bit. Suplex gets two for Morgan and it’s Red Boy again. Magnus hits a clothesline to bring Joe back in as the challengers take over. A big boot to the shoulder by Magnus sets up a Joe backsplash for two.

There’s a chinlock by Magnus to Crimson as things slow down and we enter into a traditional formula. Crimson misses a right hand and Magnus suplexes him for two. Back to Joe who peppers Crimson in the corner with right hands. A big boot out of desperation put Joe down and there’s the double tag to give us Morgan vs. Magnus. The big man cleans house with knee lifts and a double clothesline.

He charges into a Magnus boot though, but it doesn’t seem to matter as a spinning slam into a Rock Bottom (I think Chris Harris called it the Catatonic) gets two. Magnus and Joe can’t hit their double team finisher but Crimson accidentally spears Morgan. Crimson is sent to the outside and the snapmare and elbow combination gives us new champions at 10:00.

Rating: C+. Pretty good tag match here and I’ll overlook the questionable booking for the sake of giving me something to like on this show. Nothing has been bad but this first hour has come and gone with nothing significantly above average at all. Joe getting a title is a nice sight though.

Magnus and Joe would hold the titles for four months, eventually dropping them at Sacrifice 2013. Joe wouldn’t do much for the summer but would enter a tournament for the vacant TV Title, and advance to the finals on September 27, 2012’s Impact.

TV Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Samoa Joe

Both guys try for their finishers very fast but neither can get them to work. Joe hits his back elbow and enziguri in the corner for two and he takes over. He stomps away a bit and hits a chop to the back but gets rolled up for two. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Anderson as well and he pounds away. Anderson hits a jawbreaker and a Regal Roll but Joe rolls it through into a crucifix for two.

The Mic Check is countered but Joe counters a rollup into most of the Clutch but he doesn’t have the bodyscissors. Now the scissors is on and Joe gets the back too. He traps Anderson’s arm before Anderson can make the rope. This hold has been on for like 90 seconds now and Anderson is still conscious. Anderson passes out to give Joe the title and the Grand Slam at 5:21.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t much of a match for the TV Title if they were going for something special. The ending was pretty absurd with Anderson holding on in a choke for two minutes. Wouldn’t the guy be dead after that? Anyway, the match was dull as it pretty much just came and went, which isn’t what you want in a title match.

2013 was spent in the incredibly dull Aces and 8’s feud so we’ll jump ahead to the beginning of 2014 with Joe getting back to his old dominant ways on Impact on February 20, 2014.

BroMans/Zema Ion vs. Samoa Joe

Joe cleans house to start and sidesteps Zema’s middle rope cross body. The tag champions break up the MuscleBuster and Jesse hits a nice dropkick. Robbie drops a middle rope elbow and Zema gets two off a middle rope moonsault. All three of them hit charges in the corner but Joe pulls the BroMans into the way of a Zema missile dropkick. A DDT/Russian legsweep combo takes the champions down to the floor and there’s the suicide elbow. Back inside and Zema charges into the corner Rock Bottom, setting up the MuscleBuster and Koquina Clutch for the win at 3:38.

Rating: C+. This was the right way to use a comedy tag team and their goofy manager. Thankfully the Bro Mans didn’t lose the fall here, even though they got beaten up pretty badly. It’s a good way to make Joe look strong heading into Lockdown and that’s the right idea given the odds he’s up against.

Samoa Joe is a great case of someone who got too much too soon. Not that he wasn’t talented or deserving enough of the spot, but when you’re in a match for every title in the company two years after you debut, there isn’t much left for you to do. Even though Joe has only won one World Title, he’s been in TNA going on nine years now and there’s nothing left for him to accomplish other than maybe getting back on top. He’s still entertaining, but he’s more of a guy you beat to get to the top now instead of the top man. Joe is a talented guy but he’s been around so long that he needs a change of scenery.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Back to Canada today with Test.

Test debuted in the WWF in late 1998 as a bodyguard for Motley Crue but would quickly be brought in as part of the Corporation. He was in his debut match a few weeks later on the December 21, 1998 episode of Raw.

X-Pac/HHH vs. Test/The Rock

Before the match Shawn throws out DX. Vince comes out and says let them stay. Ok then. Rock and X-Pac start things off and Pac hits a kick to the chest and an armdrag to take over. Off to HHH vs. Test with the bigger guy (Test) looking as awkward as ever (which is pretty awkward). Rock’s distraction lets Test get in a big boot to somewhere around the face for two.

Rock comes in to beat HHH down some more and test gets two off a side slam. HHH gets in a facebuster and makes the tag so things can speed up a bit. Some kicks in the corner put Test down and there’s the Bronco Buster. Test dumps Pac to the floor and things break down a bit. Pac gets crotched against the post by Rock and DX is in trouble. Back in with Rock vs. Pac and a slam sets up the Corporate Elbow for two.

HHH comes in sans tag to clothesline Rock down, only to result in X-Pac getting double teamed. Off to Test who misses a clothesline and gets his head kicked off by X-Pac. There’s the hot tag to HHH who cleans house and hits a high knee to Rock and a facebuster to Test. Everything breaks down and HHH hits the Pedigree on Test but Rock makes the save. There go the lights and here comes Kane, who is suddenly not institutionalized. He chokeslams HHH and the rest of DX. Apparently Kane is the holiday bonus for the Corporation. The match is thrown out.

Rating: C. The match was fine and given that it’s the Attitude Era, expecting a pin or submission ending in a main event is asking way too much. Test didn’t look like anything more than a taller and slower Boss Man here, so adding in Kane sort of makes him look worthless. Nothing great to see here but HHH and Pac always had some chemistry together.

Test would be in a battle royal before Wrestlemania XV went on the air where the final two men got a Tag Team Title match later that night against champions Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett. Test was in the final two so here’s the “showdown”.

Tag Titles: D’Lo Brown/Test vs. Owen Hart/Jeff Jarrett

The challengers fight with each other before the match starts. Owen and Jeff have Debra with them who is in a jacket and bikini. From the neck down she’s not bad at all. It’s a brawl to start and Test hits a fast big boot to take over. Brown and Jarrett get things going officially and D’Lo hits some fast clotheslines. Jeff charges into an elbow and it’s off to Test. He’s part of the Corporate Team while Brown has no connection to them whatsoever. A powerbomb gets two on Owen but he comes back with an enziguri, only to have Brown break up the Sharpshooter attempt.

Brown comes in legally and hits the shaky head legdrop for no cover but Jeff knees Brown in the back to give Owen an opening. A spinwheel kick puts D’Lo down for no cover as it’s back to Jarrett. Brown comes back with a double clothesline to both champions and hits something resembling a Sky High on Jeff. There’s no cover though as the managers (Ivory for the challengers) are fighting. In the distraction, Owen hits a missile dropkick on Brown to give Jeff the retaining pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok enough but when the challengers are formed into a team 30 minutes before the match, it’s a little difficult to get behind a match like this. The tag division was BEGGING for something to save them here but it wouldn’t be until the fall when the Dudleys finally showed up and made the division worth something for a few more years.

Test would soon be thrown out of the Corporate Ministry and join the Union, setting up an eight man elimination tag at Over the Edge 1999.

Corporate Ministry vs. The Union

Boss Man, Viscera, Bradshaw, Farrooq
Mankind, Test, Shamrock, Big Show

DANG Vince needs to go back to the original No Chance in Hell. This one was far better. The Union was a stable that lasted all of four weeks as Vince became the Higher Power and Mankind got hurt anyway. They got together because they got tired of the Corporate Ministry beating the tar out of them. This is Survivor Series rules mind you. Test is wearing bright blue tights which are very funny looking on him.

He’s a total rookie here and no one cares about him. Somehow within five months he would be the hottest act in the company. Bradshaw hits a spear and lands some solid shots on the cranium of Test. The opening here just feels like they’re kind of lumbering around looking for something to do. He hits that sweet top rope elbow on Bradshaw as we finally get more faces in there. The Clothesline From JBL connects on Test to pin him as Shamrock was just visiting before.

Bradshaw taps in about a minute. This has no heat at all but I can’t blame anyone for that at all. It’s Big Daddy V vs. Shamrock now. I think Shamrock tried a crucifix but Viscera was just too fat for it to work. Shamrock gets the ankle lock on Farrooq but snaps and suplexes the referee which gets him out. Show gets an AWESOME chokeslam on Farrooq, holding him up there forever. This match is the living definition of a mess.

It’s Show and Foley vs. Boss Man and Viscera. Something tells me this is a one sided affair. Boss Man drops an F Bomb on Mankind before getting drilled by Show. This was back when Show could MOVE. He freaking goes off on Boss Man but gets caught with a low blow which I’m not wild on.

Apparently the two of them are counted out soon thereafter but it’s not really made all that clear. That’s simply not a good sign at all but whatever. So Foley beats Boss Man in about 2 minutes after that. Yeah that’s really it.

Rating: D-. This was just bad. I mean there was nothing at all here and while the crowd was reacting, they were far from interesting in the slightest. This felt like they forgot to tell anyone anything other than the ending which simply isn’t going to work. Their minds were there I think, but this was just a mess.

Around this time, Test began a relationship with Stephanie McMahon. This wasn’t cool with Stephanie’s brother Shane, who brought in his buddies in the Mean Street Posse to help him take care of Test. This included a gauntlet match on the July 12, 1999 episode of Raw.

Test vs. Mean Street Posse

Test has to beat all three members in a row and it’s Pete Gas first. Test kicks him in the face in the aisle before the bell, throws him over the announce table, throws him inside for a big elbow and gets the pin. Rodney is next but Pete gets a low blow to give Rodney a chance. The advantage lasts a few seconds as Test kicks Rodney in the face and hits a gutwrench powerbomb and pumphandle powerslam for the pin. Joey Abs, an actual wrestler, is last and takes over with a neckbreaker. Test easily throws him into the corner and nails a powerslam but Shane runs in for the DQ. Short but Test looked good.

The feud culminated in a Love Her Or Leave Her match between Shane and Test. The rules are simple: if Shane wins, Stephanie and Test are done but if Test wins, Shane stays away.

Test vs. Shane McMahon

This is a Greenwich street fight with love her or leave her rules. Test is dating Stephanie but Shane doesn’t approve. If Test wins, Shane stays out of their lives but if Shane wins then the relationship ends. Test has bad ribs but Shane has no backup due to Test injuring every member of the Mean Street Posse. Scratch that theory actually as they come walking out before the match. Thanks for wasting my time on the video of Test destroying all of them. The Posse has a couch set for them in the front row.

Test takes Shane down to start but Shane hits a quick spear back inside, only to be pounded in the corner. A backdrop puts Shane down as the Posse drinks champagne. Shane is sent HARD into the steps and then into the crowd for a drink to the head. Test catches Shane diving off the barricade and powerslams him down onto the floor. Shane staggers around ringside so Test launches him at the Posse to tip the couch over.

The injured Posse goes after Test and give Shane a mailbox of all things to crack over Test’s head. A street sign stuns Test again and there’s a framed portrait of the Posse shattered over Test’s head. That’s only good for two and the fans are getting into this. Shane does a great looking leapfrog and this a jumping back elbow to the face to put Test down. A corkscrew senton (Spiral Tap) of all things misses and Test comes back with right hands.

Another leapfrog is countered into a sweet powerbomb but Rodney of the Posse distracts the referee. Test’s big boot hits the referee but he clotheslines Shane to the floor. The street sign puts Shane down again but here’s the Posse again to take Test down. They load him onto the announce table so Shane can hit the top rope elbow through Test. For a non-wrestler, Shane can drop a gorgeous elbow.

The referee is back up (why did he need to be bumped? It’s a street fight) but Test kicks out at two. The fans are really getting into this. Pete accidentally hits Shane with a sign but Rodney hits Test with his cast. That’s only good for two and now the fans are fired up. Patterson and Brisco run out to take care of the Posse and make it one on one. Shane charges into the post and it’s a pump handle slam followed by the flying elbow to get Shane out of Test and Stephanie’s lives.

Rating: B. This took a little bit to get going but the fans got into it at the end. It’s a great example of a story carrying a match rather than the wild brawling. This was full of weapon shots and interference, but the story behind the match made people care about it. The people were invested in Test and wanted to see him fight for the woman he loved. That’s a classic story and it’s going to work every time. Good stuff here.

Test and Stephanie were going to be married on Raw one night but Test had to wrestle first. From November 29, 1999 on Raw.

Test vs. HHH

Before the match we get a special referee in a Vince mask. HHH is furious because there’s a restraining order against Vince but Test jumps the distracted Game to take over. HHH comes back with a kick to the chest but walks into a powerslam. Patterson and Brisco are watching in the back and ask Vince to come watch with them. HHH nails him with a knee to the ribs and stomps away in the corner. A knee drop gets two and we go back to Patterson and Brisco for more of the same.

We hit a sleeper on Test and the referee doesn’t seem to care. He finally slaps Test in the face to wake him up but HHH scores with a DDT. A low blow drops Test again but HHH stops to argue with the referee. Test comes back with a big clothesline but HHH escapes the pumphandle slam. Instead it’s a belly to back suplex to drop HHH and he bails to the floor. Test dives into a punch to the ribs, allowing HHH to grab a chair. A facebuster puts Test down but the referee won’t count. HHH goes after the referee’s mask but Shane comes in with a chair to HHH, allowing Test to drop the elbow for a fast counted pin.

Rating: D+. The match was about the masked man, who never was identified. It certainly appeared to be Vince and that’s the implication you were supposed to go with. Test was good with the fast paced stuff but his longer matches like this one never quite worked. Even HHH couldn’t get this to go right.

After the story ended, Test fell down the card and entered a tag team with Albert called T&A, managed by newcomer Trish Stratus. They feuded with the Dudley Boys soon after forming, including this match at Backlash 2000.

T&A vs. Dudley Boys

Brawl to start of course and Bubba chases Trish around on the floor. Albert and D-Von get us going with the future Japanese bore taking control. D-Von takes him down for two and I have no idea who the faces are and who the heels are here. Off to Bubba who takes his head off with a clothesline. That and an elbow drop both get two. Off to D-Von and the Dudleys hit a double suplex and the yet to be named What’s Up.

Albert comes back with a bicycle kick and it’s off to Test. Double splashes in the corner get two on D-Von. I could listen to Bubba Dudley yell from an apron all day. I’d get pretty bored but I certainly could do it. The big evil (I think?) ones double team D-Von. Albert slams Test onto D-Von and shouts to TESTIFY TO THAT. Bubba: “SHUT UP!” The fans of course want tables but D-Von gets a neckbreaker on Test instead.

The referee misses the tag to Bubba and the beating continues. Albert hits his slingshot into the bottom rope for two. A sunset flip out of nowhere gets two for D-Von, but he’s quickly powerbombed for the same. The fans want tables and Trish isn’t sure what to think. Albert goes up but Bubba distracts him, allowing D-Von to hit a superplex and make the hot tag.

Reverse 3D (called the 3D by JR of course) gets two. Baldo Bomb kills Bubba but D-Von pulls him away from the big elbow. The Dudleys load up the REAL 3D (as in Bubba gets a running start) but Trish offers a distraction by taking her jacket off and shaking her hips. Keep in mind that this is before Trish let herself go in 2001/2002, and yes I said that right. That lets Test kick Bubba’s head off for the pin.

Rating: D+. Anything with Trish in hot pink shorts and shaking her hips is never a bad thing. The match however was pretty bad, but the whole point was the post match stuff. Also the Dudleys were more or less turned face in this match due to the fans loving hot women being put through tables for some reason.

We’ll skip the rest of 2000 as it was mainly just T&A doing nothing while Trish stole the show. Off to a European Title shot for Test on the January 22, 2001 episode of Raw.

European Title: William Regal vs. Test

Regal is champion coming in here and runs down Test a bit. Test runs to the ring and destroys Regal inside of two minutes. Regal got in some punches and a knee but other than that it was ALL Test. The big boot sets up the top rope elbow (pretty) for the title. Match didn’t even make 90 seconds.

Then came the InVasion with Test getting caught up in the shuffle like everyone else, though he did pick up a few Tag Titles with Booker T. (two reigns of 13 days each). He did have some singles success though, including an Intercontinental Title shot on November 5, 2001’s Raw.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Test

Edge challenged Test last night on Heat for some reason. He jumps Test on the floor to start and they head back inside for a lot of punches from both guys. Edge tries to speed things up but walks into a tilt-a-whirl slam for two as Test takes over again. After a suplex Test chokes away with the boot in the corner but walks into a spear out of nowhere. Both guys are down and it’s Edge up first.

He hits the spinwheel kick but walks into an elbow to put him down. The big boot misses and the Edge-O-Matic gets two. Edge rolls through a powerbomb for two and hits a tornado DDT for the same. He goes up again but Test shoves the referee into the ropes to crotch the champion. Test cradles Edge and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. The match was about as good as a five and a half minute match with practically no story (Test cost Edge a match last week apparently) was going to be. That’s beside the point though. At this point in WWF, there were three midcard titles (IC, US and Euro), two world titles, two tag titles, a hardcore title and two lightweight titles.

The idea of being lost in the shuffle was perfectly illustrated by him being in a battle royal for immunity after one of the companies went out of business at Survivor Series 2001.

Immunity Battle Royal

Test, Billy Gunn, Bradshaw, Farrooq, Lance Storm, Billy Kidman, Diamond Dallas Page, Albert, Tazz, Perry Saturn, Raven, Chuck Palumbo, Crash Holly, Justin Credible, Shawn Stasiak, Steven Richards, Tommy Dreamer, The Hurricane, Spike Dudley, Hugh Morrus, Chavo Guerrero Jr., Funaki

No matter who wins the main event tonight, the winner of this is guaranteed a job for a year. Stasiak is thrown to the floor before the bell rings and is apparently out. Test drops to the floor to hide as Tazz comes in late. Since it’s a battle royal there’s really not much to talk about here. Everyone punches everyone and no one is put out for awhile. Heyman freaks out about Tazz because Tazz choked him out on Smackdown.

Hurricane dives at Farrooq and is clotheslined out by Bradshaw. Albert throws Saturn out and Test, who is back in now, dumps Farrooq. Page is put out by someone we can’t see and Storm superkicks Palumbo out. Morrus and Chavo run in as wildcards because they tried to jump from the Alliance to the WWF on Raw but got fired as a result. Billy dumps Chavo as Morrus is eliminated as well. Tazz dumps Dreamer and Crash as Storm low bridges Spike out. Bradshaw’s Clothesline kills Richards and he’s gone.

Tazz stops to run his mouth to Heyman and gets dumped by Billy. Test and I think Kidman put Albert out. We’re down to Bradshaw, Kidman, Gunn, Test and Storm. Sorry if I missed a bunch of eliminations but a lot of them weren’t shown. The fallaway slam puts Kidman out and we’re down to four. Bradshaw kicks Storm down and might have hurt his ankle. Things slow way down as Billy and Bradshaw hang on for dear life. Storm and Test team up to put Bradshaw out but Test dumps Storm as well. A big boot eliminates Gunn and Test wins immunity.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but at the end of the day, it’s a battle royal so what are you expecting to get here? Test would fall through the floor in the next year with no one caring about him at all. This was a pretty big batch of jobbers in there though and that doesn’t really make for an interesting match. Then again, neither do most battle royals.

We’ll also skip the Un-Americans, Testicles and the horrible feud with Scott Steiner. Test would be in a battle royal of former Intercontinental Champions at Judgment Day 2003.

Intercontinental Title: Battle Royal

 

Val Venis (returning here after being Chief Morely for awhile), Chris Jericho, Goldust, Lance Storm, Rob Van Dam, Christian, Test (pulling a double tonight), Kane, Booker T (not a former champion yet in this anyway)

 

Pat Patterson handles the introductions. Only 9 people in this which is a rather odd number. Standard over the top rules here. Kane and RVD, the Raw tag champions, go at it immediately. Everyone gangs up on Kane and he’s like boys please and tosses Storm. RVD takes the knee out and it’s another pile on Kane. This time they get him out so we’re down to seven.

 

Kane comes back in to beat them up for fun. Booker puts Test out and Goldust throws out Val. Jericho gets his springboard dropkick to put Van Dam out so it’s down to Goldust, Jericho, Booker and Christian. Goldie cleans house for a bit but the Canadians come back to take over. Goldust comes back and bulldogs both Canadians. This is getting boring in a hurry.

 

With the help of Booker, both Canadians gets Shattered Dreams. There’s the Spinarooni but Goldust lunges at him, only to get tossed as well. It’s down to Booker vs. Christian vs. Jericho. The fans are all behind Booker here. This isn’t his year though as he was beaten by a racist heel at Mania (People “like Booker” don’t win world titles. What do you think that was implying?) and gets double teamed here.

 

Booker fights them off for a bit and Jericho skins the cat. Down goes Booker again as the words GET ON WITH THIS play over and over in my head. Jericho is bleeding from the nose. Jericho sets for the Lionsault and Christian shoves him out! I love double crosses. Booker beats on him for awhile and a referee somehow is knocked down. Christian hit a baseball slide into him if you’re curious.

 

Yes, it’s going to be a Dusty Finish in a battle royal. Scissors kick misses and Christian goes to the apron. Booker sends him into the buckle and wins this. The music plays and Christian steals the belt from Patterson. A belt shot to the head and a toss out later and it’s Christian that officially wins the title. Booker would get it back about two months later. Everyone hates this mind you. Yes, a Dusty Finish in a battle royal. I told you this era was weak.

 

Rating: D+. Another boring match tonight which is a theme here. Was there a point to this being a battle royal other than not wanting to have two tournaments going at once? For some reason they were afraid to give Booker anything even though he was on a roll and was over at this point. That’s Vince for you though. Weak match with a bad ending.

Test would be released in 2004 and hit the indies for awhile. He would be brought back for ECW on Sci-Fi, where he feuded with Rob Van Dam. Here’s their blowoff match from October 3, 2006.

Test vs. Rob Van Dam

Extreme Rules. Test kicks him in the ribs during the finger pointing which is something you would think a lot more people would do. Van Dam is sent to the floor and Test chokes him on the barricade. Van Dam gets in a kick (were you expecting something else?) but misses the spinning leg to the back of Test, crashing into the barricade instead. Test gets the steps but gets tripped, sending the steps crashing down on top of him. In a cool spot, Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder onto Test onto the steps.

It’s table time and the fans erupt as a result. As always, that takes too much time and Test takes his head off with a clothesline in the ring. Test throws four chairs into the ring and a big boot into one of them into the head of Van Dam gets two. A suplex onto the chair is countered by Van Dam and he pelts the chair at Test’s head ala Sabu. Test goes to the apron but Van Dam can’t knock him through the table. Test tries to suplex him through the table in a repeat of the spot from last week with Holly, but Van Dam countered into a sunset powerbomb through the table in a great spot.

We take a break and come back with the arrival of Heyman and security. Back inside and Test low blows Van Dam but Rob manages to clothesline him on the top rope. The recoil sends Van Dam to the floor and the security guards pound on Rob for a bit. That gets two for Test back inside and the Canadian is getting frustrated. Somewhere in there a chair was wedged between the top and middle rope and Rob is launched head first into said chair. Somehow that only gets two and Test is stunned.

Off to a bearhug as Van Dam is in even more trouble. Van Dam escapes but a BIG chair shot to the head gets two. Test removes the buckle from a corner but RVD blocks the shot into it and this a spinwheel kick to put both guys down. Rob goes to the floor for another chair because the four in the ring weren’t enough I guess. After threatening the guards with the chair, he skateboards it into Test’s face in the corner. He loads up Rolling Thunder onto the chair but Test moves, sending Rob’s back into chair only.

With the chair on Van Dam’s face, Test goes up and drops a Cactus Jack elbow (as in he had a chair of his own and slammed it into the other chair) off the top…..for two. Test loads up another table but his powerbomb through it is countered into a sunset flip for two. Snake Eyes onto the exposed buckle is countered and Van Dam hits the top rope kick. After dispatching the guards, Van Dam loads up the Five Star through the table but Big Show comes out and shoves him through the table. A TKO from Test finally gets the pin.

Rating: B. Van Dam is on a roll right now and I’m digging this war with Heyman and his team of lackeys as he’s building up to the big rematch with Show. Test looked good here and after the match last week with Holly, I think it’s fair to call Van Dam an official miracle worker. Another strong match here which would probably be the best match of the week in WWE.

Since this would go nowhere, Test would be gone a few months later. He would show up in TNA for a few weeks as Andrew “The Punisher” Martin. Here’s his only match from Hard Justice 2007, which is something called a Doomsday Cage of Blood.

Andrew Martin/Sting/Abyss vs. Christian Cage/AJ Styles/Tomko

There’s barbed wire around the top of the cage and you win by pinfall, but the person being pinned has to be bleeding first. Abyss gets beaten down until bald Test makes the save. The lights go out and Sting appears in the ring, clocking Tomko with a chair. No one is in the ring at the moment. Ok so it’s Abyss vs. Styles now. Well they had my favorite match ever in TNA in a cage so no complaints there.

Tomko is busted so he could be pinned now. AJ gets a jumping enziguri to put Abyss to the floor again. Styles dives out of the cage to take Abyss out again. So….you know what, screw it. I’m not playing dumb on this one. GET IN THE FREAKING CAGE LIKE YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO YOU IDIOTS! Three minutes in we’re told that whoever gets the fall is the #1 contender. Well sure why not.

Test beats up Christian but Christian isn’t bleeding yet so no cover. And now we cut to the back to watch Pacman freaking Jones get loaded into an ambulance. In the middle of the second main event of all times. OH COME ON ALREADY. NO ONE FREAKING CARES TNA. This is shown for 23 seconds, which could be worse but it was 23 seconds too long. Guess what the announcers are going to talk about for awhile now.

Everyone is in the ring now I believe. Oh wait Sting isn’t. Tomko breaks up a double chokeslam and Sting is trying to get in. That fails and they manage to lock him out of the cage. Abyss is busted open from his head and arm. Total heel beatdown here but Sting has wire cutters. Sting gets in and here comes the comeback. Tomko cracks Sting with a chari and AJ hits a top rope splash on Abyss as does Christian, getting two. Test kicks a chair into Tomko’s head and there’s glass on the mat. Christian escapes which doesn’t mean anything here. Black Hole Slam onto the glass gives Abyss the pin on Styles.

Rating: C. For this big bloody war, this wasn’t much. Then again we didn’t see the complete version because we couldn’t wait five minutes to see Jones get loaded up into the ambulance of course. Not bad but Lethal Lockdown is a lot better than this was. Having only six people in there was a good thing though as it wasn’t too crowded in there.

Test would be released soon after and retire less than a year later. Unfortunately Test would pass away in March of 2009 at the age of 33.

Overall Test had a much better look than skill set but that’s the case with a ton of wrestlers. He hit his peak in 1999 with the Stephanie story but Russo leaving the company took away any interest in Test. He never really had a great match, but his matches with Shane weren’t bad at all. Test was better suited as a bodyguard but didn’t do badly at all with what he was given.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Clash of the Champions at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 20, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tazz, Mike Tenay

The big story coming out of last week is the seemingly face Bully Ray destroying all of the former Team Roode (minus A Double). It also seems that Willow is the dark side of Jeff Hardy and will allow Hardy to get revenge on people that have hurt him in very un-Jeff like ways. As for tonight, the main story is Joe vs. Magnus II with Eric Young and Abyss chained together at ringside. Let’s get to it.

We open with Eric Young trying to fight Abyss in the back. It goes badly for the small man until ODB tries to make a save with a pipe. That also goes as well as you would expect but Eric comes back with a trashcan to the back. The brawl continues as they head further into the back and Eric is sent through some chairs. Young finds a chain and whips Abyss into the arena until they get to ringside with Abyss taking over.

Eric dives into the ring and hits a suicide dive but he can’t follow up. Abyss hammers on him again and takes Young inside where he sets up a chair. Young gets slammed face first onto the chair in a sick looking crash. Abyss goes for the chain but Young bites him in the head and hammers away but charges into a Black Hole Slam. Just hurting Young isn’t enough so Abyss wraps the chain around Young’s throat and chokes him out on the ropes.

Bobby Lashley vs. Ethan Carter III

This is joined in progress after a break. Ethan has some flashier gear now with red and blue trunks and white boots. Lashley runs him over with a hard shoulder block and drops Carter with a suplex. Ethan gets pummeled in the corner but avoids a charge to put Lashley in some trouble. It’s short lived though as Lashley slams Ethan off the top.

Carter comes back with some right hands in the corner but gets run over by raw power again. Lashley loads up the spear but Carter bails to the floor. Another clothesline drops him out there but he’s able to get in the referee’s face long enough to kick Lashley low. Carter tries to walk out on the match but Willow jumps him for the DQ at 5:47.

Rating: D+. The chemistry here didn’t work but it wasn’t horrible. Lashley is a guy that could be a huge deal for TNA if he’s used right. However, being used as a guy to keep Ethan Carter III busy until Willow can attack him isn’t the right use of him. The match just kept going until we got to the ending segment, which wasn’t the most entertaining way to kill six minutes.

Jeff loads up the Pillmanizer on the ankle via the ladder but Ethan gets away. Lashley doesn’t seem to mind Willow costing him a match.

Bully Ray is outside Dixie Carter’s office in Nashville as she called him there for a meeting.

Joe comes in to see MVP and vent some frustrations. He blames MVP for the title loss at Lockdown and thinks MVP has cost him the match tonight by letting Young get taken out. MVP promises to find someone to take Eric’s place tonight.

Angelina Love thinks Velvet has had enough time to make a decision so it’s time to find out where she stands.

Ethan yells at Magnus for not having his back and terminates the Carters’ business relationship with the champ. Magnus doesn’t care because he got everything he needed out of Dixie. All he needs is Abyss and Joe will find that out tonight.

Gunner comes out and says he’s proud of what he did at Lockdown. He went to war with one of the toughest men in this company and came out on top. He’s also proud of serving this country and for all of the men and women that served with him. The Marines taught him to never give up and his dad taught him the same thing. Gunner’s dad is in the front row and Gunner thanks him for everything he’s done. They hug and here’s James Storm for an interruption.

Storm thinks he should get an introduction to Gunner’s dad but Papa Gunner doesn’t seem too enthusiastic. James goes off on Gunner for crying on the video about Gunner a few weeks back. Gunner’s grandfather must be glad that he’s dead to see his son and grandson become huge disappointments. Gunner snaps but takes the Last Call. Storm handcuffs Gunner’s arms to the ropes and goes after his dad with a beer bottle to the head.

We immediately cut to Gail Kim saying if Tapa doesn’t win tonight, she’s gone for good.

The Bro Mans and Zema talk about going to a club last night before going in to see Sanada and Tigre Uno. There’s a language barrier but Zema has wrestled in Mexico and Japan so he speaks lucha libre and strong style. Apparently Sanada and Tigre think the Bro Mans are awesome and agree to lay down in two minutes. That’s Zema’s translation at least.

Gail Kim vs. Lei’D Tapa

If Tapa loses she’s gone because Gail says so. Tapa sends Gail across the ring to start before catching her in a spinebuster. Gail counters a powerbomb into a modified dragon sleeper but Tapa powers out. Kim gets slammed face first onto the mat but gets up at two. Some kicks to the leg have Tapa in trouble and Eat Defeat is enough for the pin at 4:04.

Rating: D. Thank goodness she’s gone. Tapa just wasn’t that good and didn’t need to be around at all. I’m not a huge Gail fan but this is the better decision to be sure. The newer Knockouts like Tapa haven’t worked for the most part but Brittany seems to be a step in the right direction. Bad match, but that’s about the norm for Tapa.

Willow loudly says he has no issues in playing games with MVP over the title match, so he won’t chain himself to Abyss. Why try to change when you can embrace the confusion?

Here’s Angelina to ask Velvet for an answer. Velvet thanks Angelina for being a mentor but doesn’t like the idea of being a follower to Angelina’s leadership. Angelina says it was just because she was the veteran and praises Sky for the success she had while Angelina was gone. Love says one is a lonely number but Sky isn’t sure about trusting someone after the drama with Sabin. Then she says the team is back together and they hug.

Angelina says hang on because we need the third piece. She invites Madison Rayne to the ring but Rayne doesn’t seem too thrilled. Angelina introduces all three http://onhealthy.net/product-category/weight-loss/ names and Madison sees the problem: she doesn’t want to be the third girl that the others brought in as a favor. Love tries to get her to change her mind but Madison says she’s out.

Magnus isn’t worried about the title match tonight because he has Abyss. He may be a monster but even monsters react to money. Joe comes up and says he’ll make Magnus tap tonight. Al Snow comes in and breaks it up before things go too far.

Tag Team Titles: Bro Mans vs. Wolves vs. Sanada/Tigre Uno

Bro Mans are defending. Before the Wolves arrive, the champions try to get Tigre Uno and Sanada to lay down but Tigre says no and the champs are knocked to the floor. The Wolves show up and jump the Bro Mans but the other challengers hit baseball slides to the Bro Mans out as we take a break. Back with everything breaking down until it’s Davey grabbing a rollup on Sanada for two. Off to Eddie as the Wolves rapid fire kicks and chops to put Sanada against the ropes.

Tigre breaks up a double charge and Sanada is almost immediately back up with no apparent damage. Robbie tags himself in but Eddie rams him head first into Davey as the Wolves stay in control. Tigre comes in to face Robbie and walks into a clothesline as the champions take over. Jesse comes in and gorilla presses Tigre as Zema plays sound effects. Robbie gets two off a knee drop but Tigre comes back with a Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog.

A double tag brings in Sanada to work over Jesse but Zema grabs the X-Division Title for a qiuck photo op. Sanada dives on Zema, leaving Tigre to climb the ropes and armdrag Davey down. A powerbomb/Backstabber combo from the Wolves gets two on Tigre but the Bro Mans make the save and hit the Bro Down on Tigre for the pin at 9:58.

Rating: C+. The match was your usual insane three way but it did its job well. It’s nice to see the Bro Mans get the win after their finishing move instead of just stealing a pin. I can’t imagine the Wolves don’t get the belts for real over the summer and it looks like we might be leading towards Zema vs. Sanada.

Angelina is worried about Madison being angry. Velvet says go talk to her.

Kenny King of the Night promo.

Angelina goes to talk to Madison and talks down to her again. Madison says no again but Angelina grabs her by the hair and destroys Madison before saying she and Velvet are the real Beautiful People.

MVP will be chained to Abyss tonight.

We get a video on Knux of all people, who says he’s heard from a woman he’s been involved with before and thinks it must be serious if she’s calling him. Knux tells us about his family running a carnival and how his dad isn’t cool with Knux’s career path. To be continued.

Bully is still at Dixie’s office and we get a quickly edited video of him lecturing an off camera Dixie. She has her chair turned against the wall as Ray talks about how everyone hates her. Ray goes on about Dixie coming to New York and offering him money to screw over Team MVP but Ray didn’t respect her enough for that. He whips the chair around and of course there’s no one there. Bobby Roode jumps Ray from behind and rams Ray into a wall. Bully is stunned so Roode hits him with a poster to really knock him out.

Abyss has something planned for Joe and MVP tonight. He shows Magnus the tacks in his hand.

TNA World Title: Magnus vs. Samoa Joe

MVP and Abyss are chained together at ringside and Magnus is defending. Joe sends Magnus to the floor before throwing the champion back inside for rapid fire punches and an enziguri in the corner. Back from a break with Magnus in control and putting Joe on the mat for a chinlock. Joe fights up but gets caught with a knee to the ribs.

A powerslam puts Magnus down but Joe can’t follow up. He grabs the Clutch but Magnus breaks free with a jawbreaker, knocking the referee down in the process. Abyss goes for the tacks but MVP sends Abyss into the post and throws the bag of tacks up the ramp. Abyss comes back with a chair and stops a charging Joe with a chair shot. Magnus adds a top rope elbow to retain the title at 11:43.

Rating: C. The match was just there to get to the angle at the end. I like Abyss and Magnus as a beauty and the beast pairing and Magnus’ reliance on Abyss to save him is going to set up a blowoff match down the line. That’s the good side. The bad side however is that blowoff match will be between Magnus and Abyss. This probably shifts Joe away from the Magnus feud….or it would in a regular wrestling company. Odds are we get at least three more matches between them.

Overall Rating: D+. This show felt way too Russoified to me. I know that’s the rumor at the moment but it really does seem like Russo has a hand in creative. We had two instances of handcuffs, a random guy getting a story, and a big brutal fight leading into another segment with no room to breathe.

That’s a big issue with TNA over the years: there’s no time to catch your breath. Look at the opening segment. It’s a ten minute brawl and Eric Young is hanged. They immediately cut to the next segment and act like the previous one wasn’t a big deal at all. The same was true with Gunner’s dad getting laid out. They were IMMEDIATELY on Gail Kim’s promo and there was no time to digest what we just saw.

It’s ok to let a show build on itself instead of packing 25 stories in there. Now to be fair, they only have two hours a week and they’ve cut way down on the wastes of time, but it’s still going too fast. The fans don’t need to be going through a show at a hundred miles an hour and then try to figure out what they just saw. In other words, SLOW DOWN.

Results

Ethan Carter III b. Bobby Lashley via DQ when Willow interfered

Gail Kim b. Lei’D Tapa – Eat Defeat

Bro Mans b. Wolves and Tigre Uno/Sanada – Bro Down to Tigre

Magnus b. Samoa Joe – Top rope elbow

 

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Impact Wrestling
Date: March 13, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Taz

For the first time since October we’re coming off a pay per view and MVP is now in full control. His team won Lethal Lockdown with the help of Bully Ray swerving Dixie Carter by screwing over Team Roode this past Sunday. Other than that Abyss has been revealed as Magnus’ bodyguard/enforcer after saving the title when Samoa Joe had Magnus beaten. Tonight should be a fresh start for the company as we head towards Sacrifice at the end of next month. Let’s get to it.

The show is dedicated to Donovan Hill, who passed away at less than ten years old. I’m not sure who that is but he’s called “Our Angel.”

The Bro Mans and Ethan blame Roode for the loss but Roode says blame it on Bully Ray. A plot is hatched to take care of the Bully.

We look at some clips from Lockdown, focusing on the ends of the double main event.

Here’s a happy MVP to open the show. He’s pleased to tell us that Dixieland is officially closed for business. Just a week ago he was the minority owner but now he’s in charge and moving forward. He doesn’t know why Bully Ray did what he did but his past sins are now forgiven and he can compete like everyone else on the roster. MVP will be running this roster with the MVP Principle: Motivate, Validate, Participate. If someone has an issue, they can come deal with it, but he’s willing to give out some physical discipline if necessary.

This brings out Magnus with a rebuttal. He says this is the most ridiculous thing he’s ever seen. MVP: “More ridiculous than your title run?” Magnus talks about how Dixie is gone so now we can look at the important things like his title reign. He brings out his associate Abyss (in a new brown mask close to what Kane wore in 2002 and yellow/black trench coat) and agrees with the fans chanting YOU SOLD OUT. Magnus says he isn’t like Jim Mitchell or Eric Young because he’s going to pay Abyss to do whatever he wants.

MVP says Magnus was beaten at Lockdown until Abyss saved him. We should put this conversation on hold though, because we need Samoa Joe out here right now. Joe comes out holding his ribs but MVP says we’re not done yet. Therefore, Joe is still #1 contender and getting a match right now against Abyss.

Abyss vs. Samoa Joe

Joe takes him down and hammers away as we take a quick break. Back with Joe in control and hammering Abyss from one corner to another. He hits the Facewash in the corner but gets caught by a right hand to the injured ribs to change control. Abyss chokes on the ropes and punches in the corner like a monster should be doing.

We hit a quick neck crank but Joe fights out of a chokeslam attempt. A running boot puts Abyss down and there’s the back splash but Joe hurts his ribs again. He’s able to powerslam the monster down but Abyss fights out of a MuscleBuster attempt. Joe jumps from the middle rope into a chokeslam so Abyss goes outside to get Janice. This brings in Eric Young to dropkick Abyss down for the DQ at 9:30.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t bad but too much of it was in the commercial. It didn’t help that Joe was injured for such a long portion. Eric coming in makes sense but it doesn’t really have me fired up for the upcoming blowoff match. They had to get rid of Abyss vs. Joe somehow if they’re keeping Joe going after the title.

JB is in the back for an interview when Angelina Love returns and asks if he missed her.

Bully Ray is on his way but we cut over to Willow for one of his freaky promos that I can’t understand.

Brittany vs. Gail Kim

Brittany is debuting here despite being Santana Garrett on a One Night Only show. We get a quick profile on her, saying she’s a second generation wrestler and admires Madison Rayne. Gail goes off on Brittany but the newcomer comes back with a forearm. Kim takes her down with a quick backbreaker and sends her into the corner for some kicks and shoulders to the ribs. Brittany takes her down with a Russian legsweep and Tapa comes in. She accidentally splashes Gail though and Brittany grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:02.

Post match Gail goes off on Tapa but gets laid out and beaten up with ease.

Bully Ray arrives and gets jumped by Ethan, the Bro Mans and Roode. They choke him out and blast Ray in the head with a big board to leave him laying.

Bro Mans vs. Sanada/Tigre Uno

Non-title. Zema does the full intro to great comedic effect. We get a video of Great Muta praising Sanada and telling him to make Japan look great. Sanada gets slammed down by Jesse to start and there’s that horn. Off to Tigre who works on Robbie’s arm to the appeal of the crowd. Jesse gorilla presses the masked Tigre and pumps him over and over, only to have Sanada come in with a springboard chop to the head.

A nice double dropkick puts Robbie down and Jesse gets suplexed onto his partner. The tag champs bail to the floor and Sanada backdrops Uno onto them both in a BIG crash. Back in and double missile dropkicks put the Bro Mans down again before Sanada hits a moonsault for the pin on Robbie at 2:50.

Velvet Sky freaks out that Angelina Love is back.

Bully destroys the Bro Mans to get some revenge.

Samuel Shaw is talking to Christy and wants her out there for his rematch with Anderson. He gets annoyed when the cameraman sees him. Christy was never seen or heard in the shot.

Ethan and Spud have a tribute to Dixie up next.

Samoa Joe goes to yell at Eric Young for interfering earlier but says don’t do it again. Eric has gotten Joe a rematch next week against Magnus for the title and Eric will be chained to Abyss.

It’s time for the tribute to Dixie. The fans are glad that she’s gone but Spud is overly emotional. The fans switch to a BORING chant, but Ethan says that just makes Spud want to cry more. Spud talks about how tonight is about how Dixie made everyone feel, including supple young Ethan. Dixie picked him up like Mary lifting Jesus out of the manger and made him the man he is today.

We get a video tribute to Dixie with shots of her smiling and yelling at various people. Then one night it was all taken away in Miami Beach. MVP can take away her power, but he’ll never take her out of our hearts. Spud reads what sounds like the song Dixie until MVP breaks this up. He says Dixie is just in the back shuffling papers now. Over the last few weeks, Spud has grown on him like a fungus or a rash.

Spud and Ethan must be loyal if they put up with Dixie but now it’s time for them to back it up in the ring. Spud says he can’t wrestle because he’s small and the Chief of Staff. MVP says that’s cool because we don’t need a Chief of Staff anymore. He gives Spud a pep talk and Spud wants to fight, so tonight it’s Spud vs. Willow. The announcers just say it’s Jeff Hardy’s alter ego.

Ethan shouldn’t laugh because next week he gets to face Bobby Lashley. Bobby comes out for a staredown and MVP says he’s officially on the roster. Spud yells at Bobby so Lashley bops him with the Dixie portrait. The former Chief of Staff snuggles up to it before Ethan leaves in a huff.

JB is waiting for Ethan behind the curtain and Ethan promises to take out Lashley’s knee next week. Bully Ray jumps him and hits a HARD shot to the head. Ethan takes a hard shot with a plastic board of his own.

Samuel Shaw vs. Mr. Anderson

Street fight. Shaw was talking to the upper body of a mannequin with a red wig. Anderson does his intro but Shaw sneaks up in the darkness to jump him before the bell. Anderson comes back with some right hands and but gets whipped into the steps. Samuel drives him back first into the apron and grabs a suplex on the floor.

Anderson finally throws him into the ring and they slug it out some more until Anderson gets the swinging neckbreaker and rolling fireman’s carry. Mr. goes to the corner and grabs the mannequin’s hair, sending Shaw into a panic. He gives it a kiss and tosses it to Shaw who takes his time sitting it down, allowing the Mic Check to hit for the pin at 3:57.

Rating: D. Why in the world did this need to be a street fight? You could have done the exact same match with a brawl before the bell and thent he exact same finish. Shaw continues to be freaky and good in the role which is more than he could have done on his own. It was fine for a quick match but the gimmick brings it down.

Anderson shouts his name into the mannequin’s face.

Angelina says she’s back for someone special.

Video on the fan parties at house shows.

Willow stares at the camera.

Kenny King of the Night video.

Here’s Angelina for her return speech. She never thought she would hear that music again but it’s great to be back in TNA. She has grown wiser in the time since she left. Her dad told her that she’ll never miss what she has until it’s gone and that’s what happened with TNA. Friendships are more important though so she invites Velvet out here. They hug hello and Angelina says she never got to say goodbye.

Being apart for the last few years has made Angelina realize that Velvet made her who she is in this business. For years, Angel Williams (her ring name outside of TNA) wasn’t getting noticed but as Angelina Love she teamed with Velvet Sky and got noticed. Now every day she’s asked when the Beautiful People are getting back together and Angelina thinks the time is now.

The fans chant YES but Velvet isn’t sure because she’s found herself since Angelina has been gone. She even won the Knockouts Title for the first time and now she thinks she’s ready to move on. There will never be a bond as strong as the Beautiful People had and she wants to move forward. Angelina calls her dude and says there’s a ton of unfinished business for the Beautiful People. Love tries one more time but Velvet says she needs more time.

Willow vs. Rockstar Spud

We’re in early squash mode with Willow hammering away in the corner. A cartwheel splash has Sput in even more trouble and Willow dances a bit. Spud gets caught in the Tree of Woe and Willow gets his umbrella to blast Spud low for the DQ at 2:26.

Willow beats up the referee and pulls out a ladder before Pillmanizing Spud’s leg as revenge for costing Hardy the title. He stomps on it twice and hits a splash from the top of the ladder onto Spud’s chest, hurting the leg again in the process.  Bully Ray comes out as we take a break.

Ray says he can’t believe the fans are cheering for him. They say right before you die, your life flashes before your eyes. That happened to him when Anderson Mic Checked him into the coffin. He was going to give an explanation for what happened, but those four guys made this physical. If Roode had won on Sunday, he would have become just another Dixie Carter and that’s the last thing wrestling needs.

Ray wants Roode out here right now so here’s Bobby. He hits the ring and is immediately taken down so Bully can go get the tables. It takes too long though and Roode comes back with a spinebuster before setting up the table. The Roode Bomb is countered and Ray grabs a Cutter. A powerbomb through the table ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. Another good show here with stories making sense and good wrestling to back it up. Ray turning face makes sense and he’s still a good talker so he can back it up. Dixie is hopefully gone and Spud should be off TV as well. That being said, they rushed through the Ray story WAY too fast. Ray getting attacked and getting revenge could be spread out for a month but they did it in two hours. There’s hope for TNA, but I don’t believe they can make it last longer than two months.

Results

Abyss b. Samoa Joe via DQ when Eric Young interfered

Brittany b. Gail Kim – Rollup

Sanada/Tigre Uno b. Bro Mans – Moonsault to Robbie

Mr. Anderson b. Samuel Shaw – Mic Check

Rockstar Spud b. Willow via DQ when Willow hit Spud with an umbrella

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of Summerslam at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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That’s the rumor, but I can’t imagine it happening.First of all, the company is valued at well over two billion dollars.  That’s a lot of cash for a network that still airs films like Scorpion King 2.  Second, there’s the simple idea of Vince owning most of the stock and probably not wanting to sell.  It’s possible I guess, but I really don’t see this happening.

I’m thinking WWE winds up either back on USA or Spike, with the latter causing a lot of interesting effects.

Hello ladies. And gentlemen. Today we have Val Venis.

Val got his start in Canada before quickly moving to Puerto Rico. He and Shane Sewell (you might remember him as a wrestling referee in TNA) formed a tag team called the Canadian Glamour Boys but eventually split, leading to a feud. From some time in 1997 in the WWC.

Glamour Boy Shane vs. Sean Morely

Shane immediately scores with a dropkick and a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys outside. Sean gets punched in the face but comes back with a right hand of his own as the brawling continues. Morely hammers away against the barricade but gets whipped into the steel before they finally get back inside.

It’s Morely in control by stomping away in the corner, allowing I believe Ricky Santana to get in some cheap shots from the floor. A hard clothesline takes Shane down and Sean tosses him outside. Back in again and we hit the sleeper on the Glamour Boy but he fight sup and counters into one of his own. Sean rams him into the corner for the break but runs into a powerslam for two.

Shane pulls Morely out of the corner but gets caught in a wicked German suplex for two. A regular suplex is countered into a rollup for two by Shane but Sean comes right back with a running neckbreaker. Shane grabs a loose dragon suplex for a near fall but walks into a powerbomb for two.

Morely loads up a chokeslam but gets countered with a Stunner for two. There’s a middle rope elbow from Shane and both guys are down. Sean slams him and hits the top rope splash but Shane is up again. Two fisherman’s suplexes gets two each on Morely but the third is enough for the pin. That’s quite the finishing sequence.

Rating: C. Not bad here but I’m not sure about that finish. Is it really a finisher if you just keep doing the same move over and over until you get a pin? Morely looked good and it’s clear why he would get a big time job soon. Shane felt like he was just trying to keep up with Sean out there but he would become a huge deal in Puerto Rico over the years.

Morely would be hired by the WWF in early 1998 and become the character he was most famous as: adult star Val Venis. His first feud was with Japanese stable Kai En Tai but we’ll skip over that and jump to Summerslam 1998 and Val’s first title shot against European Champion D’Lo Brown.

European Title: Val Venis vs. D’Lo Brown

Brown is defending and there’s no story to this that I remember. It has a sixty minute time limit, just in case the lower midcard title match in the opening slot pushes going Broadway. Since we’re in MSG we have the old school set with the entrance opposite the cameras instead of off to one side. This is Venis’ first title shot and D’Lo is doing a gimmick where he’s from a different European city each time with tonight being Helsinki. He’s also part of the Nation of Domination here but only has his chest protector for an advantage here.

Brown shoves him into the ropes to start and they slap hands. The champion also slaps Val’s face to tick him off as JR tells us about Austin destroying a hearse which may have had Undertaker or Kane inside. Brown hits a standing splash with the chest protector for added impact to take over. A splash misses in the corner though and Venis takes over with a Russian legsweep. After a quick breather on the floor, Brown comes back in to run the ropes but he gets caught in a spinebuster. A newcomer named Edge is watching in the crowd.

Venis misses a splash and gets caught in a belly to back suplex to give Brown control again. Val comes back with an overhead t-bone suplex but walks into a clothesline followed by a legdrop for two. A leg lariat and a middle rope elbow gets the same and Val is holding his back for some reason. Brown follows up on the injury with a Texas Cloverleaf but lets it go after only a few seconds. Did he learn submissions from No Mercy? Brown misses a middle rope senton and both guys are down. The fans are much more into this than you would expect them to be.

Val hits some running knees to the ribs and a backdrop for no cover. He tries a high cross body but gets caught in a Sky High (lifting powerbomb) which gets a delayed two count. Brown hits a quick DDT but dives off the middle rope into a powerslam for two. A butterfly suplex sets up the Money Shot (top rope splash) but Brown gets his knees up.

The fans LOUDLY chant for D’Lo but he can’t get Val all the way up for a powerbomb. Another try is good for a running Liger Bomb but the Low Down frog splash misses. Val finally rips off the chest protector and puts it on himself before going up top. The referee tries to pull him down and crotches him, earning a toss from Val for the DQ.

Rating: C+. I was digging this until the lame ending. The problem here was the match built up over fifteen minutes and then hit a brick wall with a referee crotching a guy on the top and then complaining that the guy was hurt. That’s not a satisfactory ending to a match with that long of a build, but at least the build was good.

Val’s next feud would be with Dustin Runnels over Dustin’s wife Terri. That was Val’s schtick for a long time: stealing wrestlers’ girls and making movies with them. Here’s their showdown from Breakdown 1998.

Val Venis vs. Dustin Runnels

 

Val has Terri come out with him, basically wearing underwear and a dress with one button holding it together. A quick spinebuster puts Dustin down but Val gets his face slammed into the mat to put him down. Dustin powerbombs Val down and pounds away but Venis rakes his eyes. They head outside where Val clotheslines him inside out and the match goes back inside.

 

Dustin scores with a backdrop and fires off more right hands in the corner but gets caught by some knees to the ribs and a Russian legsweep. Venis gyrates his hips (with Terri doing the same) before punching Dustin in the face over and over. We hit a camel clutch for a bit with Dustin screaming for Terri. Back outside and Runnels is dropped face first onto the announce table. They head inside where Dustin gets two off a belly to back suplex, only to get distracted by Terri and put in a chinlock.

 

The announcers try to figure out who to blame for the marriage falling apart with JR reminding us that Dustin walked out on his family just a few months ago. Dustin fights up and hits a quick DDT for two, only to get caught on the top rope. Val looks to set up a superplex but instead dumps Dustin over the top and out to the floor, sending him face first into the apron.

 

Val heads to the floor as well but gets distracted by Terri’s leg right in front of Dustin. Venis teases leaving but sneaks back in for a rollup for two. Dustin hits his bulldog for another near fall, despite Venis screwing up by not moving an inch. The crowd is confused but Val comes back with a powerslam and some elbow drops, followed by the Money Shot for the pin.

 

Rating: D. This wasn’t very good at all with a lot of boring non-action and a really bad botch with that two count. Dustin continues to fall even further into his black hole as Venis is on the rise so to speak. The solution of course was to bring Goldust back for the ultimate revenge, which was probably the best idea for everyone concerned.

Val’s next title shot would be at St. Valentine’s Day Massacre against Intercontinental Champion Ken Shamrock. This feud would be over Ken’s sister Ryan.

Intercontinental Title: Ken Shamrock vs. Val Venis

Ken is defending. Lawler almost loses his mind over seeing Ryan in a short, strapless white dress. For the sake of clarity, I’ll only refer to Ken as Shamrock here. Ken charges into the ring and the fight is on immediately. It’s Val in early control though with some right hands and a clothesline to the back of the head to put Shamrock down. Shamrock sends him into the corner to take over and whips him across the ring into the other corner.

Ken pounds on Val on the mat and gets glared at by Billy to give Venis a breather. Back in and Val gets a quick suplex for two before firing off knees to the chest. A butterfly suplex puts Shamrock down again and Val bends him over his knee to work on the back. They head outside again where Val works on the back again before taking it inside for a camel clutch. Ken comes back with some right hands but gets caught in a double chickenwing rollup for two.

We hit the chinlock on the champion for a bit before Val hits a knee to the ribs for a VERY delayed two count. Shamrock grabs a DDT for a slightly faster two but Billy just stops before counting three. Val charges into an elbow in the corner and a powerslam gets two but Val kicks out before Billy can stop. Venis grabs a fisherman’s suplex and Billy makes very sure to get a good angle before counting.

A Russian legsweep puts Ken down and it’s time to grind a bit. Shamrock hits a quick hurricanrana and a belly to belly to set up the ankle lock but Ryan pulls Val’s hands to the rope. Ryan slaps Ken in the face and Billy punches him for good measure. Back inside and Val grabs a quick small package for the fastest three count ever for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad but it was much more about the angle than the match. That would be the case for the Intercontinental Title for months to come and the title would suffer as a result. It also didn’t help that the stories never got a proper payoff because of some screwy changes in booking right before Wrestlemania.

The title reign would only last about a month but that was often the case with the Intercontinental Title around this time. After nothing special for most of the year, Val would have a match against Mankind at No Mercy 1999.

Val Venis vs. Mankind

Random much? Venis has a copy of Foley’s book, which really did rock. Venis was given a way too solid push around this time and this is no exception. Foley is shown in the back helping Rock on the stretcher. We start on the floor of course. There’s not much to talk about here. Mankind pulls Mr. Rocko out of Val’s tights which is as stupid as you would think it is. We hit the floor for awhile and the Claw is on.

Val breaks it by slamming Foley’s head into the post. Nicely done. So Foley has a head injury. Val, using intelligence, goes for THE HEAD. Are you paying attention people? Using simple things like that can make a match that much better. This is a better match than I was expecting. Val hits an elbow to the back of the head and Foley isn’t moving at all. Money Shot misses. Double Arm DDT gets two. I’m liking it. Both guys have socks. Mankind grabs the mouth and Val grabs Foley’s balls. Ok then. That knocks Mankind out…for the pin? What the….heck? Holy head scratcher Batman. Foley gets Rocko back to end this.

Rating: B-. The story made sense here is nothing else. That’s the biggest thing it has going for it I guess. Foley continues to job for everyone. I still say that he’s the best jobber of all time. Still though, this was a pretty good match that worked well enough given what was going on in it.

Val would pick up the European Title at Armageddon 1999 but lose it a few months later. After returning from a back injury, Val would shed the adult star gimmick and also shedding his hair while gaining Trish Stratus as a manager. This would prove to be a success for him as he would pick up another Intercontinental Title. He would defend that title at Fully Loaded 2000 against former champion Rikishi inside a cage.

Intercontinental Title: Rikishi vs. Val Venis

We’re in a cage here. Fink makes sure to point that out despite the BIG FREAKING CAGE around the ring. Apparently Tazz cost Rikishi the title a few weeks ago for reasons unexplained. Also Venis beat up Scotty, which apparently justifies this being in a cage. Trish is Val’s manager here and is dressed in her more traditional attire here, meaning she still looks great. Apparently Rikishi gave Trish a stink face to start this.

Lawler asks if you can imagine someone putting their fat in her face? There’s a bit of wishful sounding in his voice there. Lawler isn’t sure if this is no holds barred. Seriously? He follows this up by asking what happened to that long hair Val had? Ross: “well King I would assume he got it cut.” I love Ross at times. They’re rare but they exist.

Rikishi, ever the Rhodes Scholar, tries to climb over the top instead of going through the door like anyone with a freaking mind. Why do faces have to have so much stupid pride like that? Val takes over with some bad shots to the cage. To be fair though he’s having to deal with something that has its own gravitational force.

He hits a low blow to block a stink face and then hits a weird looking move that I think was supposed to be a bulldog but turned into more or less a forearm to the back of the head. I think it was a semi botch by one of them but I’m not sure. Rikishi of course does his inside out bump.

Val, also an idiot, goes up the cage as well instead of through the door. My goodness how hard is it to just walk through the freaking thing? They fight on the top rope which Val wins, but with Rikishi down in the position for Val’s finisher, does he go for it? Of course not. Why should he when he can walk the ropes and hit an elbow instead? Val almost gets out but is caught by the fat that blocked out the sun.

They mess up badly though as Rikishi’s head is hurt by ramming it into the cage. He’s a Samoan so therefore his head can’t be hurt. Come on now people don’t you know your stereotypes yet? Val is bleeding and thankfully we don’t go to black and white to hide that. A Banzai Drop gets two as Val gets his foot on the ropes. Great, so in a match with no rules and where anything goes, the ropes are still allowed to break things up. That makes sense.

Thanks to Trish again ignoring all racial stereotypes and slamming the door on Rikishi’s head, the Money Shot gets two. Lita bounces down to the ring and whips Trish with the belt and rips her top off. The beating goes to the back as somehow this is less pointless than modern wrestling. We then get the spot of the night as Rikishi goes up top, and I mean to the top of the cage and dives off, completely crushing Val.

Do Samoans have a fetish for jumping off cages or something? This looked completely amazing and on the replay they mess up worse than I’ve ever seen as the camera totally misses Rikishi. I mean you see no wrestlers and only cage the whole shot. It’s rather funny actually. Since the referee is down from an earlier bump though, there’s no one to count. As Rikishi goes for the door, Tazz comes down and nails him with a camera so Val can pin him.

What the heck man? What’s the point in a huge bump like that unless you change the title with it? That’s just stupid. Oh yeah it’s a Rikishi match so it’s not supposed to make sense. How this guy would become top heel in about 3 months baffles me to no end.

Rating: B-. The match was fine, but seriously, what was the point of the huge spot if Val keeps the title? I know that’s what happened in MSG back in the 80s, but that was legendary whereas this was more or less forgotten a few weeks later. I don’t get it at all. The match was your run of the mill cage match otherwise though as I still hate pins in one of these. It’s not that hard to find a way for one of the guys to get out is it? That bump was INSANE though.

Venis would join up with the Right to Censor and get in a feud with Smackdown commentator Tazz and the APA, culminating in a six man tag at Wrestlemania X7.

Right to Censor vs. APA/Taz

The RTC is a censorship group with Val Venis, Goodfather and Bull Buchanan with Steven Richards outside. They censor stuff, the other three don’t like it, let’s fight. Oh and Jackie is with the good guys but no one cares about her. It’s a big brawl to start with the RTC getting destroyed very quickly. We start with Faarooq vs. Buchanan with Bull hitting the climb the rope clothesline for an early two. Off to Taz who gets kicked in the head and triple teamed by RTC.

Venis comes in with some knees to the ribs for two before it’s off to Goodfather. He continues the destruction of Taz including the non-Ho Train for no cover. There’s the hot tag to Bradshaw as the beating shifts. Venis gets caught in the fallaway slam as everything breaks down. A double spinebuster crushes Venis and there’s a belly to back superplex for good measure. Goodfather misses a charge in the corner and Bradshaw kills him dead with the Clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C-. This is pretty easily the worst match of the show and it’s certainly not bad at all. This was short and almost sweet which is what it was supposed to be. The idea here was to have the censors get beaten up by the Texan and give the fans a good feeling which is exactly what happened. Not a good match or anything but it’s completely watchable.

Soon after Val would have to take a long stretch of time off to recover from hip surgery. After returning to TV at the 2002 Royal Rumble, Venis would start calling himself the Big Valbowski and do nothing of note for a few months before getting hurt again. He would return again in early 2003 as Chief Morely, the new Chief of Staff for Eric Bischoff. Val would be given one half of the Tag Team Titles when Lance Storm’s partner William Regal was injured. They would defend them against Rob Van Dam and Kane on Heat prior to Wrestlemania XIX.

Raw Tag Titles: Kane/Rob Van Dam vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

The Dudleys are in champions’ corner for no apparent reason. Kane shove Storm to the floor to start and Van Dam kicks Morely’s head off. Van Dam hits a nice flip dive to take out the champions and Kane adds a plancha of his own to pop the crowd. We take a break and come back with the champions in control of Van Dam and Morely grabs a sleeper. Van Dam counters into one of his own but gets caught in a Blue Thunder Bomb.

Rob avoids a splash and makes the tag off to Kane who cleans house with a tilt-a-whirl slam for two on Storm. There’s the top rope clothesline for two more as Morely makes the save. Everything breaks down with the challengers in control and there’s the chokeslam to Storm. RVD loads up the Five Star but Morely shoves him off the top. The Dudleys lay out Storm with the 3D before dropping an elbow on Rob to give Lance the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match here which had some strange booking decisions. Kane and Van Dam would take the titles the next night on Raw, so why not just switch them here to fire the crowd up before the show starts? The tag division was really starting to die around this point and having two sets of titles just didn’t work.

After this Val would become a jobber to the stars and a Heat mainstay. One of his matches though was against a guy you might have heard of in January 2005.

Val Venis vs. Ric Flair

Venis takes him down with a shoulder block and commentator Ivory is already getting on my nerves. Flair gets caught in a hammerlock and armbar before a backdrops puts him down. Ric bails to the floor after a slam and comes back inside for a poke to the eye, drawing a HUGE pop from the crowd. Venis tries to chop with Flair and is almost immediately punched down.

The knee drop has Venis in trouble and we suddenly have no commentary. I’ll bump the rating up for that alone. More chops have Flair in control but Venis comes back with another backdrop and a clothesline for two. Val pounds away in the corner and hits ten quick clotheslines to give us the Flair Flop. Venis fires off more corner punches but Flair falls down into a chop block as only he could get away with. Another chop block sets up the Figure Four to give Flair the win.

Rating: C. This was Flair 101 and it still works well enough. The most notable thing here though was Ivory driving me insane on commentary. That screachy voice was bad enough but when the best comment she can have is “It looks like Ric Flair is in control now.” That’s the kind of commentary that’s good for radio but gets annoying on television.

During this stretch Val would face lower level guys and jobbers, but would occasionally be given a wrestler who the company was looking at to see what they could do. That’s quite the honor when you think about it. Here’s the most known example of Val doing this, from May of 2005.

Val Venis vs. CM Punk

They trade hammerlocks to start until Venis runs him over with a shoulder and armdrag. Punk snaps up and tries a rollup to give us a stalemate. They shake hands but Punk runs him over with a clothesline and kicks at Val’s leg. CM slaps on a leg lock but Venis comes back with chops in the corner, only to have his leg wrapped around the post. Punk cranks on the leg even more but Val kicks him away.

Val hits a backdrop but hurts his knee. He fires off clotheslines in the corner and gets two off a neckbreaker. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two for Val but he can’t hit a fisherman’s buster. Punk snaps the knee back and puts on a half crab. Val makes the ropes and hits a half nelson slam followed by the Money Shot for the pin.

Rating: C-. I could see why Punk got a job out of this. Oddly enough he put on a better performance than the seasoned Venis who only sold the knee a little bit. That kind of stuff gets on my nerves in wrestling. If someone works on the knee, you need to do more than holding your knee after doing your regular stuff. The injury should change your offense, not just slow it down.

That’s about it for Morely in WWE as he just did Heat matches and the occasion match on Raw before being released in January 2009. He would show up on Impact on January 4, 2010 as an adult film producer. After people got done rolling their eyes at this gimmick being resurrected, Morely fought Christopher Daniels at Genesis 2010.

Sean Morely vs. Christopher Daniels

Remember, even though Morely is wearing a towel and coming out to the signature music, HE ISN’T VAL VENIS! Brooke gets Morely’s towel. Three times the camera has been on her in less than 30 minutes now. Daniels is the heel here and cuts a bland heel promo before the match which doesn’t work well at all since the fans aren’t buying it. Fourth shot of Brooke.

Daniels in the long tights works much better. Has that thing on his shoulder ever been explained? I don’t think it has been. I’ve always liked Morely. He’s a guy you can almost guarantee a good match out of which is so rare in modern wrestling. Daniels hooks a triangle choke to appeal to the MMA fans out there. Apparently Morely is a true pro. I thought they were all pros.

You can wrestle in TNA as an amateur? They’ve never heard of Mass Transit have they? Morely hits a Blue Thunder Bomb which is one of my favorites in No Mercy so I’m liking this more and more every second. I’m still not sold on a match being made for no apparent reason and then having a PPV match of it 3 days later but then again I’m no professional.

A clothesline is called an STO. That’s expected I guess but still, that wasn’t even close. The Best Moonsault Ever misses and Sean goes for the splash. Since that’s too easy though it doesn’t work, although he hits it a few seconds later which draws Brooke Hogan shot #5.

Rating: C+. Again, not bad at all. Morely is a guy that you can certainly depend on for a good match and it worked well here. Again though, why is this on PPV? Why were they even fighting? That was never explained which is a common theme on this show I think. Also, Morely hasn’t wrestled on the main stage in years and he can beat last month’s world title challenger? That makes perfect sense right?

Val Venis is a very smooth wrestler but he got dragged down by his gimmick. It’s very similar to Terry Taylor in that regard: there’s excellent talent there but at the end of the day, you can’t get past the gimmick. His earlier work is his best when the era fit his character, but later on he was at his best as a jobber to the stars who could make anyone look good. When Venis is on, it’s hard to find a bad match from him which is rarer than you would think.

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Up to Michigan for Rick Steiner.

Rick got his start in Mid-South back in 1983 under his real name of Robert Rechsteiner and amazingly enough you can actually see some of those matches.

Robert Rechsteiner vs. Nick Patrick

Yes that Nick Patrick. Robert easily takes him down to the mat and to make things even more interesting, Ric Flair is on commentary. A hiptoss puts Nick down but he comes back with a hiptoss of his own. Patrick grabs a headlock and gets two off a cross body but Robert takes him right back down into a chinlock. A big gorilla press and a belly to belly suplex are enough to pin Patrick with ease.

After a few years in various territories, it was off to the NWA where one of Rick’s first major matches was at Starrcade 1987 in the opening match.

Sting/Jimmy Garvin/Michael Hayes vs. Eddie Gilbert/Larry Zbyszko/Rick Steiner

 

This is right after Jim Crockett acquired the UWF, so a lot of these guys are making their big time debuts. Gilbert was a big deal back there, as was Hayes. Sting didn’t mean anything at this point, but he would have his day very soon. He had recently left Gilbert’s stable in the UWF so they have a built in feud already. Steiner jumps Sting to start but misses a charge and falls to the floor. Sting dives out onto him as the lighting is really bad here. It looks like the lights haven’t been turned all the way on.

 

As they head back in, Sting hits a missile dropkick as everything breaks down. Sting’s team clears the ring until we get down to Hayes vs. Steiner. Michael pounds on the arm for a bit and it’s off to Garvin. Michael and Jimmy would wind up as a tag team in a few years but here’s they’re just randomly paired together. Off to Larry to fight Garvin and it’s time to stall already. Larry was legendary for stalling and it drove a lot of people crazy, myself included.

 

Back to Hayes who grabs Larry by the nose and pounds away. Michael struts and moon walks to get the crowd fired up as it’s off to Gilbert. Hayes avoids a right hand and struts some more before sending Eddie into the corner. Back to Sting as things speed up a bit, but at this point he’s not capable of carrying a match on his own. Sting grabs an armbar on Steiner and it’s off to Garvin for more basic offense on Rick.

 

Steiner takes him into the heel corner and it’s off to Larry for a spinning kick to Garvin’s ribs. A powerslam gets two for Rick and it’s off to Gilbert for an atomic drop. Gilbert stays on the back for a bit but misses an elbow drop. It’s not enough for the tag out though as Steiner comes in for the save. Off to a bearhug to further the punishment on Garvin’s back but Jimmy fights out. Larry saves another hot tag and puts on an abdominal stretch. Garvin finally hiptosses his way out of it and it’s off to Sting to pick up the pace.

 

Everything breaks down but Gilbert comes in with a cheap shot to the back to take Sting down. Eddie sends him out to the floor for a bit before throwing him back in for some triple teaming. It doesn’t seem to do much good as Sting counters a Zbyzsko suplex, only to be stopped by Steiner.

 

Sting avoids a charge from Larry and it’s off to Hayes with less than two minutes to go in the time limit. Everything breaks down and the good guys all pound away on a bad guy in a different corner. The DDT gets two for Hayes on Larry but he’s in the ropes. One minute to go as Steiner breaks up a sleeper on Larry. Steiner comes in legally for a bearhug of all things before turning it into a belly to belly suplex. Everything breaks down again and the time runs out with no winner.

 

Rating: C. This was probably the best opener the series has had yet and it’s very obvious that that’s not saying much. The main idea here was to introduce most of these people to the Jim Crockett audience and it only worked to a degree. Steiner actually came off looking the most polished here, but Hayes would have the immediate success. Sting would be several months away from his big break.

Soon after this, Rick would join the Varsity Club, a group of wrestlers who were successful in college. Rick was an All-American at the University of Michigan and fit in perfectly. However Rick’s character was presented as being slow mentally, so the rest of the club treated him badly. This led to Rick being thrown out of the Club but getting a TV Title shot at Starrcade 1988 against Club leader Mike Rotunda.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Mike Rotundo

 

This should pick things up a bit. The idea here is that Rick used to be in the Varsity Club but was used as a whipping boy by Rotundo for the better part of a year. One day Steiner, whose mind is a bit scrambled because of a car accident he had a few years earlier, got sick of Mike’s treatment of him and suplexed Rotundo into the middle of next week. Rotundo agreed to face Steiner here to embarrass him, because Rotundo claimed that no one could beat him in a twenty minute match, which is the time limit for TV Title matches. Mike is defending if that’s not clear. Kevin Sullivan is locked in a cage hanging from the ceiling.

 

Mike gets knocked out to the floor to start as Rick is really excited early on. Back in and the champion puts on a wristlock but gets caught in a quick fireman’s carry to get us back to a standoff. Rick hooks a headlock for a bit until Mike shoves him away. Steiner is perfectly fine with that and takes Rotundo’s head off with a Steiner Line for two. A drop toehold puts Rick down but he immediately counters into a hammerlock. Steiner has been out wrestling Rotundo the entire time here.

 

Mick finally counters into a headlock on the mat but Rick, the good guy here, pulls the hair to escape. Back up and Steiner puts on a headlock but gets suplexed down by the champion. They head to the mat again with Mike holding Rick down in a headscissors. Apparently that’s too boring for them so it’s back up for some more circling. Rick starts dancing a bit so Mike bails to the floor for a breather.

 

Back in and Rick runs him over again, only to miss a charge and go flying over the top and out to the floor. Mike pounds away with some elbows to the head back inside followed by a kick to the chest. Off to a chinlock by Rotundo for a LONG time as the match slows down again. A hard clothesline puts Steiner down again as the commentary has stopped for some reason. Rick comes back with a sunset flip for two but gets punched in the jaw for his efforts.

 

Rick fights back again and hits a quick Steiner Line to take Rotundo down. Now the commentary is back and Steiner is pounding away on Mike in the corner. A big backdrop puts the champion down and a powerslam gets two. Rick hits the belly to belly suplex but Steve Williams rings the bell. The referee thinks it’s the time limit but we’ve only gone about seventeen minutes out of twenty allotted.

 

The timekeeper tells the referee what happened as Sullivan is lowered. Another referee comes down as well and Sullivan gets on the apron. Steiner rams Rotundo into Sullivan, knocking the champion out. Rick gets the pin (from both referees) and the title, blowing the roof off the place. It’s one of the loudest pops you’ll ever hear anywhere in wrestling.

 

Rating: C-. The match mostly sucked, but man alive the ending to that was awesome. This is a perfect example of how you blow off a story at the biggest show of the year. The fans went NUTS for the ending as they identified with Steiner as someone standing up to a bully and finally getting his revenge on said bully. Rotundo would get the title back in a few weeks, but THIS match was the important moment and it was done perfectly.

 

Rick hits the floor and sprints around the ring, pointing at a confused Rotundo and shouting I BEAT YOU I BEAT YOU I BEAT YOU! He grabs the TV Title and runs out of the arena before Williams can kill him as the fans come unglued. This is one of those moments where if you don’t smile just a little bit, odds are you don’t have a soul.

Soon after this Rick would be joined by his brother Scott Steiner to form the Steiner Brothers. The pair would win the World Tag Team Titles later in 1989, eventually entering into a feud with two masked men called Doom. The teams would face off at Clash of the Champions X: Texas Shootout in a title vs. mask match.

World Tag Team Titles: Doom vs. Steiner Brothers

 

This is titles vs. masks and Doom is now managed by Theodore R. Long instead of Woman. Scott brawls into the corner with Doom #1 to start and Scott is accused of pulling on the mask. Instead he comes back with a powerslam and rides #1 on the mat amateur style. #2 comes in to try his luck and hammers away on Scott’s chest. Scott comes back with a dropkick to both masked men, knocking them out to the floor. #2 is pulled back in and Scott goes after the mask to no avail.

 

Rick comes in to face #2 and bark a lot. #2 is whipped from corner to corner but he again gets away when his mask is threatened. Back inside and Rick hits a gorgeous overhead belly to belly and it’s back to #1 vs. Scott. #2 gets in a cheap shot from the apron to stop a charging Scott and Doom takes over. Choking and double teaming ensues with a double backdrop putting Scott down again. A big clothesline sends Scott over the top and out to the floor where #1 gets in a few cheap shots.

 

Back in and Scott gets a quick sunset flip for two but it seems to just tick Doom off even more. Scott grabs a Frankensteiner out of nowhere and the hot tag brings in Rick. He cleans house and gets #1’s mask off to reveal Butch Reed. Rick puts the mask on as Reed apologizes to his partner, allowing Rick to get a quick rollup for the pin.

 

Rating: C-. This was a standard formula tag team power match but not as fun as the previous match. It doesn’t help that there was no doubt about Doom’s identities as there were only two men in the organization that looked like them and one sounded exactly like Ron Simmons and the other wrestled exactly like Butch Reed.

Scott would get injured about a year later, putting Rick into a quick singles run. During this span he was given a WCW World Title shot at Clash of the Champions XVII.

WCW World Title: Rick Steiner vs. Lex Luger

 

Mr. Hughes is ejected before the match can get started. Rick drives him into the corner to start before taking him down to the mat in a nice amateur move. Luger walks around the ring and is easily knocked down by a shoulder block. A big Steiner Line sends Luger over the top and out to the floor for a meeting with Race.

 

Back in and Luger gets a single kick to the stomach before ramming Rick into the buckle for no effect. A belly to back suplex gets two on the champion but the referee gets bumped, allowing Luger to crotch Rick on the top rope. Luger clotheslines Rick in the back of the head to put Steiner down again and an elbow drop gets two.

 

Rick is sent to the floor where Race gets in a cheap shot and Luger is very pleased. Back in and Steiner hits a big right hand and puts Luger down down with a powerslam. The top rope bulldog gets two and a belly to belly superplex looks to pin Luger but Scott and Mr. Hughes fight into the ring. During the melee, Luger is able to get in a shot with the belt for the pin to retain.

 

Rating: C-. Scott would have been a better challenger had he been healthy but Rick throwing those suplexes was always fun to see. The match is a pretty big letdown after the Sting stuff but it certainly wasn’t a bad effort when Steiner had pretty much no chance at all of winning the belt.

After a pretty worthless 1992, Rick and Scott headed over to the WWF and won the World Tag Team Titles. One of their major defenses was against Smoky Mountain Wrestling’s Heavenly Bodies at Summerslam 1993.

Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Heavenly Bodies

Jim Cornette manages the challengers, who are Jimmy Del Ray and Tom Pritchard. This is part of the cross promotion with SMW. Heenan sings Cornette’s praises, which was how Cornette got over as a heel. He had debuted not long before this and Heenan immediately hugged him. Since Heenan was a heel and Cornette was a friend of his, Cornette was instantly hated. No shades of gray, no thought to it, just basic heel work. I miss stuff like that so much.

The Bodies jump the champions and send Scott out to the floor early on. A double flapjack puts Rick down and Scott is knocked back to the floor, but the Bodies spend too much time double teaming. All four are in now with the Steiners cleaning house to the delight of the crowd. I’m sure it has nothing to do with them wearing University of Michigan colors. A tilt-a-whirl slam (called a suplex by Vince) puts Del Ray down and the Steiners stand tall.

We officially start with Pritchard vs. Scott and Tom is slammed down in a BIG gorilla press. A backdrop puts Del Ray down and it’s off to Rick vs. Pritchard. Rick cleans house with Steiner Lines to send the challengers to the floor. Back in the and the Bodies finally start cheating, allowing Pritchard to hit an enziguri to send Scott to the floor, followed by a Del Ray moonsault press to wipe Scott out.

Back in and Del Ry hits a Rocky Maivia spinning DDT but doesn’t cover like the schnook that he is. Heenan has the match 1112-9 in favor of the Bodies. A powerslam gets two for Del Ray and Cornette jabs Scott in the throat with his tennis racket. Scott finally comes back with a belly to belly out of nowhere and makes the hot tag to Rick.

Everyone gets Steiner Lines (Heenan: “Mrs. Steiner just gave her daughter a Steiner Line!”) but the top rope bulldog only gets two on Del Ray thanks to a save. Cornette throws in the racket but a shot to Rick’s back is only good for two. Del Ray misses a moonsault and the Frankensteiner retains the belts.

Rating: C+. This was as by the book of a tag team match as you can get but it was still good stuff. I don’t think anyone cared about the Heavenly Bodies but that’s where a good manager like Cornette can come in handy: the fans are going to boo anyone he’s out there with, including a tag team who never did anything of note in the WWF.

After not doing much else in the WWF, Rick would head to ECW for a bit before they went home to WCW. Slamboree 1996 saw another Battlebowl format with “random” tag matches. Rick and Scott would be on opposing teams in their first match.

Battlebowl First Round: Scott Steiner/Craig Pittman vs. Rick Steiner/Booty Man

Is this like a sick joke or something??? Teddy Long is Pittman’s manager for no explained reason. At least we can look at Kimberly. Pittman and Booty Man start. Oh just shoot me now. It has to be less painful. Wow it’s weird seeing Teddy out there as a manager. The announcers are orgasming over Rick vs. Scott. I can’t say I blame them as they didn’t have a showdown for a long time. And there it is.

Actually they tag twice so Scott isn’t legal. The fans pop to it too so this is a good idea. To their credit, they actually get in there and wrestle rather than do a short sequence that will be forgotten in 8 seconds. I’m not saying this steals the show or anything, but they actually throw each other around and pound on each other, but no punches.

This worked and when Rick made the tag it didn’t feel like it had been weak or short or anything like that. They were in there about 2-3 minutes and it was fine. I like that. After an arm hold on Booty Man, Rick comes in and a German suplex on Pittman ends it with Rick and Booty winning.

Rating: C. Best match of the night by far to this point. Rick vs. Scott was a nice touch indeed and while no one at this point is buying the pairings being random, this was certainly entertaining and came off well. It’s a pleasant surprise if nothing else, but at the end of the day Pittman and Booty Man just weren’t going to be able to get anywhere.

One of the major differences for Rick’s second run in WCW was he wrestled more singles matches, including this one from October 7, 1996 on Nitro.

Chris Benoit vs. Rick Steiner

 

Scott is injured but is here with Rick anyway. Steiner goes right after him to start and pounds him down with ease. I still don’t get why this mini-feud is even happening. Belly to belly gets two. Off to a chinlock and we talk about an Olympic silver medalist talking about joining WCW, which wouldn’t happen. Another suplex has Benoit holding his neck and head, which makes me wince a bit given what we know now. After a two count we take a break.

 

Back with Benoit in control with a chinlock but he goes to the corner and pounds away when the cameras are back on. Scott goes after Nick Patrick a bit and Patrick freaks. An NWO limo arrives with Hogan inside with Giant. The match isn’t that important I guess. Hogan says watch this place because he has business to take care of. Benoit had Rick in a chinlock at the time so at least he was smart enough to think through it.

 

Eric rants about Jarrett some more and Benoit hooks another chinlock. Rick wakes up and hits a huge Steiner Line but Benoit just gets mad because of it. He chops Rick so hard Rick’s headgear falls off. FREAKING OW MAN! Swan Dive gets two. Benoit jumps into a suplex and then a DDT gets two for Rick. The top rope bulldog gets….two? Since we were having a decent match, here’s Debra to make sure it gets screwy. Mongo goes for the briefcase but Rick steals it and waffles Mongo with it (great looking shot) and then hits Benoit for the pin.

 

Rating: C+. Without the shenanigans and distractions, this would have been a pretty solid match. Rick certainly wasn’t much in his later career, but when he was on he was on pretty well which was the case here. Benoit was so hungry at this point and you could tell how awesome he would be if they gave him the proper push, which unfortunately never really happened.

Around this time the NWO was already in full swing and the Steiners went to war with the Outsiders over the World Tag Team Titles. This led to a singles match between Rick and Kevin Nash for the Tag Titles (it’s WCW. Just go with it) at Spring Stampede 1997.

Tag Titles: Kevin Nash vs. Rick Steiner

Only in WCW. Nick Patrick is referee because we need more gimmicks in this. Rick jumps him but gets knocked down almost immediately. DiBiase and Syxx are at ringside so this is 4-1. Nash pounds on him in the corner and hits his knees but runs into a boot. Belly to belly suplex looks like Rick is picking up a boulder. That suplex/powerslam move he uses gets two.

Syxx pulls the top rope down and Steiner crashes to the floor. Back in the side slam gets two. Why isn’t Patrick fast counting him? The Outsiders are the champions coming in here. DiBiase gets in a right hand and Nash hits the running crotch attack while Rick is in 619 position. Big boot puts Rick down as we’re totally in squash territory. There’s the Jackknife but Steiner kicks out. I don’t remember many people ever doing that other than Undertaker.

Steiner hits him low on another Jackknife attempt which Patrick actually doesn’t DQ him for. He’s kind of doing a bad job of being an evil referee here. Rick hits the bulldog but it only gets two, even though Nash’s shoulder never came up. Down goes Syxx but Nash comes back with a clothesline to take over again.

Syxx takes off the buckle pad and Snake Eyes onto the buckle sets up Snake Eyes on the buckle which sets up Snake Eyes on the buckle which sets up Snake Eyes on the buckle which sets up the Jackknife for the pin and a forced count (Patrick was hesitant) for the pin. The interesting thing here is that DiBiase says that’s enough in the middle of this and Nash yells at him. DiBiase walks out.

Rating: D-. So Nash wins a squash on PPV in a one on one match for the titles. I guess the more important part here is that DiBiase looks to be defecting which would mean more if he was an actual wrestler. This would lead to him managing the Steiners which would last for awhile until I think February. The match sucked.

The Steiner Brothers would split in early 1998 with Scott joining the NWO. Somehow it took them six months for a blowoff match but those matches sucked and Rick got hurt afterwards, so we’ll jump ahead to Slamboree 1999 after Rick turned heel and was challenging Booker T for the TV Title.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Booker T

Booker is champion here if I didn’t make that clear. Rick starts out with a belly to belly release and a couple of Steiner Lines. I think he’s the heel here but I’m not sure. More control by Steiner until Booker kicks him in the face to put him down. Steiner pops up of course because he isn’t going to sell anything. Off to a chinlock by Booker. I think he’s either heel here or borderline heel.

Steiner takes over on the floor and things slow way down. Time for a chinlock again. The crowd is very quiet. Steiner punches a lot and the fans don’t care. A bunch of punches gets two and here’s that chinlock again. Booker fights back and hits the axe kick, a spinebuster and the missile dropkick but STEINER WON’T SELL THEM. Here’s what happens after every move: Steiner lays there about 2-4 seconds then gets up like nothing happened. Scott finally runs out for the distraction and a Steiner Line gets two. Scott trips Booker and the Bulldog off the ropes gives Rick the title.

Rating: D. Just a horribly boring match here as Rick is beyond worthless in the ring at this point. Naturally the answer to that is to give him a title for four months. He wouldn’t sell ANYTHING Booker did here and Booker looks like a joke as a result. Bad match but as usual, most of it is due to Rick being lazy and not selling anything.

Around this time Rick would become a bigger heel and be part of a somewhat infamous match on August 9, 1999 on Nitro.

Hulk Hogan/Sting/Goldberg vs. Sid Vicious/Kevin Nash/Rick Steiner

This is a huge deal as it’s Hogan’s first time appearing in the red and yellow in over three years. The feuds here are Hogan vs. Nash, Goldberg vs. Steiner and Sid vs. Sting. The fans absolutely lose their minds as Hulk shoves Rick down to start. A quick big boot sets up a series of elbow drops and Hogan cleans house of all the heels. After a huge ovation, it’s off to Nash vs. Goldberg with the shorter guy getting two off a big shoulder block. Sid comes in and pounds away on Goldberg’s chest to almost no effect.

Goldberg puts Sid on the top rope for a Stinger Splash but Sid gets his knees up to stop a top rope splash. Nash comes in with a side slam for two before ripping off a turnbuckle pad. The referee won’t allow him to drop Sting with Snake Eyes but Nash bumps him so everything breaks down. Sid starts swinging a chair but Hogan takes it away and blasts the villains, allowing Sting to put the Deathlock on Nash for the win.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing more than the moment at the beginning but it kept the crowd going throughout the entire match. There’s nothing wrong with throwing all three feuds into a single match and it works as well as anything else could. Not that any of these feuds would go anywhere, but at least there’s an idea.

Soon after this Rick would receive another TV Title shot at Halloween Havoc 1999.

TV Title: Chris Benoit vs. Rick Steiner

Benoit is champion coming in. This is the main event of the last two Nitros I’ve done too. Steiner immediately stalls on the floor and catches Benoit when the Canadian chases him. Steiner Line and a suplex puts Benoit down for two. Benoit fights back and hits a superplex but Steiner no sells that too. A Crossface attempt is avoided and we head to the floor. Benoit hits a suicide dive and Steiner is up in seconds.

Steiner keeps stalling every time Benoit gets anything going. There’s a kick to the balls and Steiner takes over with a rest hold to the leg. Time for a chinlock because Steiner has already wrestled like 6 minutes. Steiner uses various boring power moves as Benoit sells like a master for him. The American hits two Germans on the Canadian for two. Make that three which is all Steiner seems to be able to do. It must run in the family.

A suplex is countered into a DDT by Benoit to finally give him a breather. Not that Steiner sells it or anything. A flying shoulder block and Steiner is up first again. Three Rolling Germans get two and Steiner won’t freaking stay down. There goes the referee and Steiner brings in a chair which goes into Steiner’s face but he throws it at Benoit during a Swan Dive attempt. Malenko comes in and turns on Benoit by hitting him with the chair. That’s enough for the pin and the title for Steiner.

Rating: D. Rick Steiner messes up almost every match he’s in. What can Benoit do when Steiner won’t stay down off ANYTHING Benoit hits him with? This is one of those great examples of why Benoit left. Why should he stick around here when he’s getting jobbed out to Sid for the US Title a few months earlier (Sid wouldn’t sell) and now to another washed up old guy who won’t sell? The TV Title would be around for a little over another month as Steiner would drop it to Scott Hall and Hall would literally throw the title away.

That was pretty much it for Rick in WCW as he wouldn’t do anything of note in 2000, win a quick US Title right before the company folded, then head to Japan for a few years. Rick would appear at a reunion show called World Wrestling Legends in 2006.

Virgilvs. RickSteiner

Virgil is called that but his name graphic says Mr. Jones. Whatever as the guy is a jerk anyway. Virgil has a big old beer gut. He tries to jump Rick to start and the bald man is in command. Steiner Line and a T-Bone hit, and when I say hit for the suplex I use that term more loosely than a head cheerleader’s vagina, for two. Death Valley Driver gives Steiner the win in maybe a minute forty. See what I’m dealing with here?

We’ll wrap it up in TNA with a Steiner Brothers reunion from Genesis 2007 for the Tag Titles.

Tag Titles: AJ Styles/Tomko vs. Steiner Brothers

 

Yes, those Steiner Brothers. In 2007. They’re faces here and AJ set this up by challenging Scott to a takedown contest. Rick is in a Steiner Brothers t-shirt and workout pants. I think that’s better for everyone. Scott vs. AJ starts us off and AJ’s luck isn’t very good here. Scott beats AJ like he stole something but Tomko’s distraction lets AJ hit a jumping enziguri (not the Pele) and a dive over the top to take over.

 

Steiner grabs the spinning belly to belly and it’s off to Rick vs. Tomko. At least the workout pants have bulldogs on them. A Death Valley Driver puts Tomko down but the champs take over and make him the face in peril. And scratch that as a Steiner Line brings in Scott. Tomko grabs a powerbomb and AJ adds a splash for two. Scott has a chain hanging from his beard. That can’t be a good idea.

 

Rick comes in off the not very hot tag and cleans house on the champions. The Steiners load up the Steiner Bulldog to AJ and I shudder with Rick on top for a big move. It actually doesn’t kill Styles but Tomko has to make the save anyway. Scott and Tomko have a brawl on the floor as Rick powerbombs AJ. The referee is down on the floor thanks to the brawl so Rick’s cover doesn’t matter. Somehow a chair gets into the ring and Styles kicks Rick low and a chair shot ends this.

 

Rating: D+. I have no idea what the point of this was. The Steiners hadn’t meant anything in about 12 years at this point but it’s the TNA attitude of once a draw, always a draw. This was nothing to see at all and the match was pretty weak, especially with the champs having to cheat to win. They would hold the titles for a then record 6 months.

While he doesn’t have the success on his own that Scott ever had, Rick still had a very good career on his own. Some of his time with the Varsity Club was great and the Mike Rotunda match was as awesome of a moment as you’ll ever see in the NWA. He would be around for years but his later times were getting pretty dreadful, hence why I skipped over most of the period. You’re better off with a Best of the Steiner Brothers marathon.

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Lockdown 2014
Date: March 9, 2014
Location: BankUnited Center, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s been five months since the last pay per view so this isn’t something TNA is used to anymore. We have a double main event tonight with Magnus defending the World Title against Samoa Joe and Team MVP vs. Team Dixie in Lethal Lockdown for control of the company. The Lethal Lockdown match also has Jeff Hardy returning for the first time in a few months. All of the matches tonight are in the cage so let’s get to it.

We see Magnus arriving earlier today.

The opening video talks about being alone with your greatest enemies inside the cage.

Bad Influence/Chris Sabin vs. Great Muta/Sanada/Yasu

Daniels and Kazarian come out in Great Muta garb circa 1989. Sanada took the X Title from Austin Aries a week ago in Japan. Sabin and Sanada get things going and fight over hiptosses before Sanada grabs an abdominal stretch. It’s quickly off to Muta to drop some fast elbows on Sabin followed by a crossface hold. Daniels makes the save but we get the Green Mist from Muta.

Back to Yasuyuki who gets taken into the wrong corner with Daniels dropping him with a belly to back suplex, setting up a slingshot legdrop from Kaz for two. Daniels suplexes Kaz onto Yatzu, setting up a springboard moonsault for two from Christopher. Back to Kaz who misses a top rope legdrop, allowing the hot tag off to Sanada.

He cleans house until Bad Influence hits a quick High/Low for two. Daniels takes Sanada down for a second but a hot tag brings in Muta to really clean house with dragon screw leg whips all around. The Mist puts Daniels down and there’s the Shining Wizard, setting up a moonsault from Sanada for the pin on Daniels at 9:22.

Rating: C. Not a bad match and a good choice for an opener, but it’s also a good example of what’s wrong with the all cages gimmick. The cage added absolutely nothing here and there’s no reason for the cage to be there at all. The fans reacted well to the Japanese guys so it certainly wasn’t a terrible idea.

Here’s Spud to introduce Dixie as real royalty. She calls herself a real queen, unlike that stupid King James. Dixie rants about how MVP and the people have driven her to do something she’s going to regret. She built this company into the international success that it is. Earlier this week she went to New York to get a little insurance policy to ensure victory tonight. Jeff Hardy walked out on this company and therefore breached his contract. Therefore, he’s banned from the building tonight and now we can enjoy the rest of the show.

Velvet Sky and Eric Young are answering internet questions. Eric thinks everything changes after tonight.

We recap Shaw vs. Anderson. Shaw is obsessed with Christy Hemme and Anderson is protecting her from harm. Samuel thinks this means Anderson is preventing him from being with Christy and has been attacking him as a result.

Mr. Anderson vs. Samuel Shaw

This is escape only. Before Anderson comes out, Shaw climbs to the top of the cage and says if Christy doesn’t come out, he’s going to professionally end it all. Before he can jump though, Anderson comes out and points out the obvious: the cage isn’t high enough to do a lot of damage. All that will do is break his ankle and make Shaw look even goofier. Anderson offers to beat Shaw up a bit and then take him somewhere really high to jump.

We’re finally ready to go with Anderson taking over for a few moments but running into a boot in the corner. Christy is at ringside now. An early Mic Check is blocked but Anderson takes him down with a gutwrench suplex. Shaw chokes Anderson in the corner but can’t quite get over the cage. Anderson goes after him but gets rammed face first into the cage a few times and knocked down to the mat. Shaw still can’t climb fast enough though and Anderson runs the corner for a belly to back superplex.

Shaw sends him face first into the cage but Anderson sends him into the cage door, knocking it open and drilling Earl Hebner in the process. There’s the Mic Check to Shaw and a second one sends him face first into the buckle. Anderson calls him a frickin weirdo and climbs the cage but Shaw reaches through a hole in the cage and pulls Christy in.

Shaw starts crawling on the mat ala Kevin Sullivan at the 1988 Great American Bash. Anderson makes it to the floor but there’s no referee. Mr. gets the key from Hebner and opens the door for the save but Shaw hits Anderson low and chokes him out before leaving for the win at 10:12.

Rating: C. I liked this a lot more than I was expecting to with Shaw getting creepier and creepier every week. The longer this story goes the more likely it seems that Christy joins Shaw at some point, but it doesn’t have quite the impact since she and Anderson are just friends. Not much of a match but the story and characters are good. It’s very nice to see someone like Anderson go from one feud right into another like people did back in the day instead of just floating around and doing nothing at all.

Team Roode isn’t sure what the insurance policy is and argue about who will own what percentage of the company after they win.

We quickly look at Ethan Carter III injuring Kurt Angle, putting Kurt out of the match tonight.

Here’s Ethan who has issued an open challenge for Angle’s spot. Ethan talks about growing up wanting to be the best and to beat the best. In 1996, Kurt Angle was the best and Ethan took him out twice now. The fans say he can’t wrestle but Ethan comes back with chants of “I’m very good” and “I disagree.” By the way this is our third promo tonight and it’s getting clear that they’re stalling, despite having eight matches. He asks anyone to come out here but warns the fans not to hijack this show.

Ethan Carter III vs. Bobby Lashley

Well that’s a surprise. Ethan insists that Lashley isn’t on the roster but Bobby powerslams him down and hits a big spear. There was no bell so it wasn’t a match, meaning Ethan is still undefeated.

Kenny King’s King of the Night promo.

Magnus says he’s all alone tonight but he’s used to that. He has to battle against Joe on his own tonight and he’s fighting a lone crusade. Something doesn’t sit well with him tonight because everyone is talking about what Joe is going to do to him. No one has asked what Magnus is going to do to Joe. Tonight, Joe bows down to the reign of Magnus.

Manik vs. Tigre Uno

Pin/submission to win here. Tigre Uno is Extreme Tiger from AAA. They trade some very fast wristlocks to start before they both go for dropkicks and crash to the mat. Back up and they miss each other a few times until Tigre dropkicks Manik down. Manik comes out of the corner with a headscissors before throwing him to the top rope, only to have Tigre catch himself on the cage. A moonsault gets two on Manik but Tigre misses a charge and goes flying into the steel.

Manik gets two off a belly to back suplex and drives some knees into Tigre’s back. There’s a surfboard hold from Manik and he drops Tigre backwards for two. Manik gets two more off a dropkick and a backbreaker gets the same. Tigre comes back by jumping up to the top rope and coming down with a hurricanrana.

A spinwheel kick and running DDT drop Manik again but he can’t get a sunset bomb off the top. Instead Manik dropkicks him in the back and gets two of his own off a sitout powerbomb. They trade standing switches and Tigre tries a capture suplex, only to drop Manik down onto his head. A quick Sabretooth (moonsault into a 450) Splash is enough to give Tigre the pin at 7:48.

Rating: C+. Take two guys and let them fly around the ring for eight minutes. It worked every night in WCW and it’s going to work every single time you use it in wrestling. Tigre Uno looked good out there and will be a nice addition to the division, bringing the roster up to what, five people? Good stuff here but this show needs something that matters soon.

We recap Gunner vs. Storm. Gunner took the Feast or Fired briefcase from him and Storm was livid, eventually turning on Gunner to cost him the World Title match against Magnus. Tonight it’s last man standing.

James Storm vs. Gunner

New music and long tights for James tonight. They start fighting on the ramp and Storm gets in a good shot early. Gunner rams him into the cage and suplexes him on the floor before going to get some chairs. He throws three of them into the cage but Storm sends him into the steps to slow Gunner down. Storm sends him into the cage and slams the cage door on Gunner’s head. He demands a count and we get the opening bell followed by a four count.

Storm wedges a chair into the corner and takes Gunner down with a jumping DDT for five. Gunner tries to get up but gets choked down by a tag rope and dropped throat first across the top rope. James ties the rope around Gunner’s throat and ties it to the rope but Gunner rips it away, only to be taken down by a low blow. Gunner no sells some ramming into the buckle and rams his own head into the same buckle for good measure.

Some running knees including one to Storm’s head have Storm in trouble and Gunner pulls the top of the steps into the ring. A hard shot to James’ head gets eight but he comes back with a quick Closing Time (Codebreaker) before ramming Gunner into the chair in the corner. James blasts him in the back with the chair but Gunner is getting that look in his eyes. He fights up and scores with a spear and an F5 as the fans think this is awesome. Storm tries to grab the chair but Gunner stands on it to thwart the Cowboy’s plans.

Gunner slams him down again and goes up, only to have Storm throw the chair at Gunner’s head on the way down for seven. Another hard shot to the back gets five and Storm sets up some chairs in the ring. He loads up the Eye of the Storm but Gunner gets to the ropes in the corner. Both guys climb to the middle rope and ram each other into the cage until Gunner superplexes him through the chairs for the win at 12:02.

Rating: B. Good but not great last man standing match here as they beat a lot of tar out of each other. Gunner getting a win over a former world champion on pay per view isn’t going to hurt anythin gbut I just don’t see a top level guy in him. The ending spot and chair pelting spot looked good and the match was a lot of fun, which is what matters here.

We look at Dixie’s promo again because that’s what we do in TNA.

Team MVP is ready for revenge but don’t like the idea of being patient. Richards wants to get Aries for injuring his shoulder but MVP tells him to keep his composure. MVP promises to unleash the Wolves and the hunt will be on.

We recap Gail Kim vs. Madison Rayne. They used to be best friends but titles came between them. How many times has TNA used that story for this division in recent years?

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Madison Rayne

Rayne is defending. Gail quickly takes her down to start and chokes with a boot but Madison gets a quick rollup for two. Kim fakes her out on a middle rope cross body and tries to leave, only to have Madison get above her and use her legs to ram Gail’s head into the cage. Madison gets pulled off the cage and down to the mat in a crash for two but she’s still able to make a save as Gail tries to leave.

Kim bends her over a knee for a backbreaker but Rayne stretches her legs up for a kick to the head. Madison sends her face first into the cage and drops her with some forearms and a low dropkick. Both girls climb the cage but Gail brings her down with a neckbreaker in a big crash. Madison makes a save to prevent an escape but gets leveraged into the cage for two. They both climb again and Gail is sent down, setting up a top rope spear for the pin to retain Madison’s title at 8:55.

Rating: C. Madison is getting better in the ring and is of course very nice to look at so the match wasn’t all that bad. The cage added something with the collisions here but it’s still nothing that blew me away. The division is dying for some fresh stories but that’s been the case for years now.

Joe says he’s dominated the last few months to earn this shot. He once considered Magnus to be a brother but now Magnus has thrown that away for the quick and easy path to the title. Joe will make the pain tangible and bash it into Magnus’ skull over and over again.

We recap Joe vs. Magnus which was already covered in Joe’s promo. Magnus was part of the Main Event Mafia but joined Dixie Carter to become champion. Tonight it’s knockout or submission only to win.

TNA World Title: Samoa Joe vs. Magnus

Magnus is defending. Joe gets in the first offense with a hard kick to the thigh but the champion takes him down with a headlock. In a unique move, Joe grabs a wristlock and headbutts Magnus’ hand before putting on a hammerlock. A hard back elbow to the jaw drops Magnus again and Joe peppers him with right hands in the corner. Joe chops him down in the corner and hits the Facewash.

Magnus avoids the running backsplash and hammers away before raking Joe’s eyes. The champion misses a charge and goes into the cage so Joe rams him face first into the steel over and over. The ramming draws blood and Joe goes right after it but misses a charge, allowing the Englishman to send him face first into the steel over and over. Now Joe is busted open and Magnus locks on the Figure Four.

Joe turns it over but Magnus immediately lets go and puts on a camel clutch. That’s powered out of as well but Magnus slaps on a sleeper. Joe picks him up into the air and drops Magnus down onto his back, putting both guys down. Magnus loses a forearm slugout but gets a boot up in the corner to stop a charging Samoan. Joe comes right back with a slam and the backsplash followed by a cross armbreaker.

Magnus rolls out and heads up top and shoves Joe down before dropping the big elbow. Joe gets back to his feet and wins a slugout with his hard slaps before crotching Magnus down on the top. There’s the MuscleBuster and the Koquina Clutch but Abyss’ hand comes up through the ring and pulls Joe through the mat. After a few seconds, a furious Joe slowly comes up through the ring and chokes Magnus in the corner. Abyss comes up through the hole and hits Joe in the stomach with Janice before a Black Hole Slam sets up the Koquina Clutch from Magnus for the win at 19:28.

Rating: B-. Well the Authority has its Kane now. I don’t think it was a big surprise that there were shenanigans at the end but the question was what would happen. Abyss being the corporate monster gives him something to do but it’s not exactly something new. Then again, this is TNA where we have to have an evil alliance on top of the company because that’s almost all they know how to do.

Post match Eric Young asks Abyss what he’s thinking but Magnus says get him out of here.

Dixie sends Spud to get the insurance policy.  Roode comes in and says he’s nervous but Dixie says there’s insurance.  They tell each other not to screw this up.

We recap Lethal Lockdown with both teams fighting for control of the company.  Aries swerved MVP to join Team Roode but MVP brought back Jeff Hardy to even things out.

Team MVP vs. Team Roode

MVP, Wolves, Jeff Hardy

Bobby Roode, Bro Mans, Austin Aries

It’s Lethal Lockdown, meaning WarGames and the winner gets control of TNA (Roode is fighting for Dixie and gets 10% ownership if his team wins). Two men start for five minutes followed by a member of Team Roode (due to winning a match on Impact) enters for a two minute advantage. After two minutes a member of Team MVP enters to even things out for two minutes. This alternates until all eight are in when a roof with weapons is lowered and then it’s one fall to a finish, including pins.

Aries and the hometown boy MVP get things going with MVP kicking Aries in the face. Austin comes back with a bulldog and the Last Chancery before laying on the ropes. A missile dropkick doesn’t work as MVP catches him in an exploder suplex and the Ballin Elbow but Aries takes him out before it lands. Aries hits a running dropkick but MVP slams him down and hammers away. Austin escapes an arm hold but misses an elbow drop as Robbie E comes in for the advantage after four minutes.

MVP immediately drops him on his face but Aries gets in a cheap shot and the heels take over. A top rope ax handle puts MVP down and E drops a middle rope elbow to the face. They talk trash to MVP until Eddie Edwards ties things up. Eddie cleans house as you expect a fresh man to do in a Lethal Lockdown match. DJ Zema Ion tries to interfere but gets knocked off the cage wall in a big bump. The good guys control for a bit until the clock runs out with Jesse Godderz giving Team Roode a 3-2 advantage.

The Bro Mans take over without much happening until Davey Richards and his bad arm ties things up. Davey of course gives his team the advantage again with the fast paced double team offense as the WarGames formula is firmly in place here. Stereo half crabs have the Bro Mans in trouble until Aries clotheslines the Wolves from behind. Roode and his awesome sleeveless coat makes it 4-3. The captains go face to face until Roode takes MVP down with a spinebuster.

The heels take complete control until the clock comes on and it’s Willow (Jeff Hardy’s new gimmick, which looks like a black and white Ultimo Dragon mask and really high pants) to tie things up and complete both teams. He comes in as the lights are out and dives off the top of the cage. If they don’t want us to know he’s Hardy, they might have wanted to give him a full body suit to cover the big green tattoo. Thankfully Taz and Tenay drop hints about who it is as the roof with the weapons lower…..and here’s Dixie.

She introduces the insurance policy as the special referee: Bully Ray. As in the guy that spent a year and a half trying to destroy her company. Team MVP waits for Ray at the door but Team Roode jumps them from behind. The weapons are brought in with Ray finding a table under the ring. Dixie sits in a chair on the stage to watch the carnage as it’s all Team Roode. Bobby puts Davey’s bad arm in the Crossface with Bully asking if he wants to give up and talking trash at the same time.

Team Roode all has front facelocks on their opponents but a triple backdrop breaks them free. Richards is broken out quickly and MVP makes sure to hit the Ballin Elbow on Roode. The weapons are used more extensively and Willow loads up a powerbomb on Aries but throws him face first into the cage instead. Robbie is tied up in the Tree of Woe as Ray is just standing in the corner watching. The Wolves set up a trashcan in front of Robbie’s face for an AWESOME double Van Terminator.

Aries is sat in a chair and kicked over and over until he grabs Richards for a BRAINBUSTER THROUGH THE CHAIR. Willow breaks up the save but Aries puts him on a trashcan, only to have Willow move before the 450 only hits the can. A Twist of Fate and Swanton gets a very delayed two on Aries as Roode makes the save and sends Willow into the cage. The table is set up in the cage but Ray gets in the way of the Roode Bomb to MVP. Ray and Roode stare each other down until Ray gives him a Bully Bomb. MVP hits a quick Drive By on Roode for the pin at 26:53.

Rating: B+. The match started slowly but those big spots at the end were great. MVP winning is the right call and fairly obvious (I don’t believe heels have EVER won Lethal Lockdown) but at least there was some drama in there. I don’t get the point of having Hardy be Willow if they’re going to just acknowledge he’s Hardy in a costume. Good main event and a match the show needed.

Dixie and Spud go to the cage but Spud pulls her away from Ray. Bully puts Roode through a table to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. The show was entertaining but the ending didn’t do much for me. The New York thing was pretty obvious if you thought about it long enough and Lethal Lockdown was the same as it always was. Overall it wasn’t bad, but like everything else with TNA it didn’t feel like it made things better.

The company is still in the same place: a promotion with a not bad story but nothing all that exciting because it’s most of the same guys just being rotated into different spots with about one new guy being added to the main event every year. At least the Authority is broken (for now) and we don’t have some evil owner. Then again this is TNA so I give them until June to have Dixie back on TV and in power.

Results

Great Muta/Sanada/Yasu b. Bad Influence/Chris Sabin – Moonsault to Daniels

Samuel Shaw b. Mr. Anderson – Shaw escaped the cage

Tigre Uno b. Manik – Sabretooth Splash

Gunner b. James Storm – Superplex through two chairs

Madison Rayne b. Gail Kim – Top rope spear

Magnus b. Samoa Joe – Koquina Clutch

Team MVP b. Team Roode – Drive By to Roode

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This was an actual surprise.Bobby Lashley returned to answer Ethan Carter III’s challenge.