Wrestlemania Count-Up – XXII (2020 Redo): The Forgotten Wrestlemania

Wrestlemania XXII
Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 17,159
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

It’s time for the biggest night of the year and this time around it has been rather fun. The Raw side has been a heck of a build while the Smackdown side has been hit and miss at best. This is one of the more forgotten Wrestlemanias (given that the image on the poster was of John Cena vs. Booker T., a match which hadn’t taken place in over a year at this point, you can kind of tell that they aren’t caring all that much) and it’s also the last one to date in a regular arena. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Eugene, Viscera, Goldust, Snitsky, Rob Conway, Tyson Tomko, Lance Cade, Trevor Murdoch, Matt Striker, Super Crazy, Psicosis, Funaki, Steven Richards, Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro, Animal, William Regal, Simon Dean

Half from Raw and half from Smackdown, so yes they are wearing the designated shirts. Dean tries to do his intro and gets kicked in the face for the immediate elimination. Richards gets rid of Conway and Funaki goes out as well. There goes Cade, followed by Goldust getting rid of Richards. Striker is out too and there go Crazy and Goldust as the ring is cleared out in a hurry. Snitsky gets rid of Regal and MNM dumps Eugene after a Snapshot.

We get the Raw vs. Smackdown showdown and Murdoch and Psicosis go out back to back. We’re down to Viscera, MNM, Snitsky, Tomko and Animal with Viscera and Animal being the targets for the other four. Viscera misses a charge in the corner but beats up MNM without much trouble. That means a double Visagra (Cole: “Melts in your mouth, not in your hand!” What in the world could that possibly mean in this context?) and Melina is nearly sick. It gets even worse as Viscera tosses MNM to get us down to four.

Snitsky kicks Tomko out by mistake and the LOD chants start back up. A big boot to Animal lets Viscera get rid of him, much to the crowd’s annoyance. Snitsky misses a running big boot though and Viscera wins without touching Snitsky at all. Cole: “I was hoping that would go on for another 15-20 minutes!” Tazz: “One of the best battle royals I’ve ever been a part of!” They’re bringing the Wrestlemania level snark this year.

Rating: D. Yeah this was horrible but the whole point was to get the undercard on the roster. I’m not sure on the logic of having the Chicago guy get all the way to the final three and then have him lose for the sake of Viscera, but I guess they don’t want a heel winning to open the show. Not that it would have mattered as it would have been one of the pops of the night, but it’s not worth getting annoyed about in the first place as it was a six minute battle royal before the feature presentation begins.

Post match Viscera kisses Lilian, who doesn’t seem thrilled.

Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child sings America the Beautiful. You know they’re getting in those American visuals every year and this is no exception.

The opening video looks at some great Wrestlemania moments over I Dare You by Shinedown. I like the song so this is a pretty good combination. They switch over to another song and the matches for this year’s show. That’s a nice mix that they tend to do well most years.

The posters of wrestlers around the top of the arena are a nice touch.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Carlito/Chris Masters vs. Big Show/Kane

Show/Kane are defending and we get the always awesome visual of the city set being on fire during Kane’s entrance. Masters shoulders Kane down to start as JR says this is the first tradition two on two tag match for these titles since Wrestlemania XV. How do you go that long without doing the normal version? Kane is back up with a leapfrog into a dropkick and it’s off to Show for the loud chops in the corner. A poke to the eye allows the tag off to Carlito, who gets a HECK of a reception (one of the loudest reactions I’ve ever seen for him), though Show throws both he and Masters around with ease.

Carlito gets gorilla pressed over the top onto Masters (seemingly elbowing him in the face on the way down) and Kane hits the top rope clothesline onto both of them. Back in and a double flapjack actually gets two on Show, with the replay showing a ram into an exposed buckle had something to do with it. Kane gets the tag so Show has to break up the Masterlock. Everything breaks down and Masters saves Carlito from the chokeslam. Masters hits Carlito by mistake when trying to save him again, meaning Kane can boot Masters to the floor. Not the chokeslam can hit Carlito to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. It was basically a more energetic Raw match and that works well enough for a Wrestlemania opener. I tend to like something like this more than some white hot match to open the show as it means you can go up from here. Carlito and Masters hadn’t been treated as threats to the title coming into the show so it makes sense for them to be little more than an annoyance here.

Post match, Carlito and Masters argue, with the fans being entirely behind Carlito. No violence ensues though.

Shawn Michaels, with a bandage on his head, says he doesn’t regret saying that Vince McMahon needed to grow up. Last year he and Kurt Angle tore the house down and the year before that, he did the same thing with Chris Benoit and HHH. Tonight, Shawn is going to be a different version of himself. Tonight, Vince McMahon needs to bow down and pray because Shawn is taking him to his own personal h***.

Matt Hardy vs. Finlay vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Rob Van Dam

Money in the Bank, allowing Cole to get in his first (to be fair in this case, minor) slip up of the night by saying Edge cashed in after John Cena’s Armageddon match. It’s a big brawl to start and the fans are behind Van Dam early on. Hardy goes for the first ladder but Van Dam takes him down with a slingshot dive onto the ladder onto Hardy for the crash. A ladder is bridged against the ropes so Shelton gets a running start for a huge flip dive to take down all of the young people.

Flair and Finlay fight in the ring (go on) but Matt comes in for the save with a superplex to bring Flair off the ladder (egads man). So Flair screams a lot and gets the X treatment (thanks to his knee), meaning we’re going to be down a person after about two and a half minutes. Lashley goes up top but Shelton grabs a sunset bomb. He can’t get Lashley down though so Finlay and Hardy go into the hurt business to bring Lashley crashing to the mat. Hardy crushes Finlay with the ladder in the corner until Finlay throws it back at him.

Finlay loads up the ladder but here’s Flair (after about three minutes away) to cut him off. Chops abound and Flair goes up again until Finlay makes the save with the Shillelagh, making Flair take another bump he shouldn’t be taking. The briefcase is swinging back and forth so Finlay can’t pull it down, allowing Shelton to go up as well. Lashley breaks that up and hits the Dominator on Benjamin, so Van Dam has to dropkick a chair into Lashley for the save.

Matt’s screaming legdrop from the ladder hits Lashley but he has to Side Effect Finlay off the ladder. Finlay gets knocked down as well though and Rob hits a splash off the very top of the ladder for the big crash. Van Dam goes up so Shelton does the always insane springboard onto the top of the ladder (because he can just do that) and hammers away. Matt brings in another ladder and climbs up to slug away at Shelton, who steps over to the other ladder. Rob shoves them both over for the big crash to the floor (always looks great) though and pulls down the briefcase to win.

Rating: B. This was good but not quite up to the standard that the big ladder matches have. It wasn’t all that long either and they didn’t have time to build much up. Shelton got in the big, impressive spots but there were enough high level bumps to go around. Van Dam and Flair were the only realistic winners here too so they picked one of the best options. Not as good as the others, but it still did what it was supposed to do.

New Hall of Famer Gene Okerlund is interrupted by Randy Orton, who doesn’t think much of someone who held a microphone for thirty five years. He promises to win the Smackdown World Title tonight but here’s Batista to say whoever leaves as champion is just holding it for him. Next year, he’s going to be champion at Wrestlemania XXIII.

It’s time for the Hall of Fame class, minus Bret Hart, who was not comfortable with appearing.

Gene Okerlund (No one did it better.)

Sensational Sherri (How was she not in already?)

Tony Atlas (He always seems happy to be around.)

Verne Gagne (Doesn’t mean anything directly to WWE, but you don’t have a wrestling Hall of Fame without him.)

William Perry (Sure, but he couldn’t get a suit? Or a tie? Or a shirt that tucked in?)

The Blackjacks (Again, how were they not in already?)

Eddie Guerrero (Yep.)

Vickie Guerrero looks rather overcome by the reception in a touching moment.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL, with Jillian Hall, is challenging and the ramp raises up so the limo can drive in. After commentary can manage to stop talking about Jillian’s cowgirl look, they bring up JBL wanting to prove that he can beat another great technical wrestler after Eddie Guerrero. They go straight to the slugout to start until Benoit drop toeholds him to try the Crossface. JBL is able to block it so Benoit headbutts him in the back of the head, which is a rather intense next step.

Some forearms to the neck keep JBL in trouble and a chop takes him down again. It’s too early for the Sharpshooter though and JBL bails to the floor to hide behind Jillian. Back in and JBL hammers him down in the corner until he misses a charge, allowing Benoit to roll the German suplexes. JBL crotches him on top though and hits the Eddie dance for some good mocking. The superplex brings Benoit down in a crash, allowing JBL to dance some more. He even hits two Amigos before having to boot Benoit in the face to cut off the comeback.

We hit the chinlock but Benoit fights up with more suplexes. The Swan Dive gets a close two but JBL blocks another Crossface attempt. He also blocks a German suplex with a grab of the rope and the referee, allowing him to….actually not cheat. Instead the Clothesline From JBL is countered into the Crossface, which is countered into a cradle (with a grab of the rope) to give JBL the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This has always been a bit of a weird one for me as JBL wasn’t exactly a hot challenger coming in but he did pick up the title, which reheated him in a hurry. He wasn’t going to make it back to the World Title anytime soon (or ever, as he didn’t need it), but he needed to win something instead of losing over and over again. This was good enough though and it’s hardly a stretch to see JBL win a match over Benoit.

We recap Edge vs. Mick Foley. Edge accused Foley of costing him the Raw World Title and wanted to beat him down, so Foley agreed to a fight. Foley wanted that one Wrestlemania moment and Edge is starting to realize that he might be in over his head.

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Hardcore match, Joey Styles joins commentary, Lita is here with Edge and Foley’s flannel shirt is buttoned up for a change. Edge has a bat to start but the early swings miss and Edge drops it to the floor. Foley slugs away in the corner and puts Edge in the Tree of Woe for the running elbow to the face. Lita throws in a metal sign though and it goes upside Foley’s head over and over. The spear hits early….and Edge is in a lot of pain, as Foley opens up the shirt to reveal a band of barbed wire wrapped around his stomach.

Foley cuts himself free and ties Edge in the ropes, meaning it’s time to grab the barbed wire bat. Lita tries for the save so it’s the Cactus Clothesline to Edge, sending all three outside in the process. Foley is certainly bringing it early on. A neckbreaker on the floor drops Edge and Foley pounds him down but his charge is hiptossed into the steps for a REALLY painful looking crash. There go Foley’s knees into the steps and it’s time for a chair. Edge loads up a table on the floor but Foley rolls off before Edge can come off the top.

Instead Edge slams him head first into the steel ramp (for a SICK thud)….and it’s time for the lighter fluid. Edge covers Foley in the fluid but gets piledriven for two. Foley grabs the chair but a Lita distraction lets Edge hit a DDT. Foley is busted and the barbed wire bat to the head makes it even worse. It’s time for the thumbtacks but Foley slams Edge (with no shirt) down onto them for the really big reaction.

A barbed wire Mandible Claw goes on and now it’s Edge being hit with the barbed wire bat over and over. Now it’s time for Foley to spray the table with lighter fluid but Lita hits Foley in the knee with the barbed wire bat. The table is set on fire and Edge hits the spear through the ropes and through the fire for the pin.

Rating: A. What is there to say about this? They massacred each other and Foley bled all over the place before taking a huge bump to end the match. This was a different side of Edge and it’s the side that needed to be shown to make him feel like more than a flash in the pan. This felt like two people wanting to hurt each other and then getting to do so, as Foley continues to know how to make someone into a much bigger star than almost anyone else.

Edge and Lita looking like they’re in physical shock after the match makes it a lot better.

Some fans won tickets to the show from Snickers.

Booker T./Sharmell vs. Boogeyman

Booker makes Sharmell start, jumps Boogeyman from behind, and then comes in to hammer on Boogeyman. The comeback doesn’t take long and Booker is sent into the post. Boogeyman eats some worms and stares at Sharmell for trying a staff shot to the back. Sharmell gets kissed with the worms and runs off, leaving Boogeyman to chokebomb Booker for the pin.

Rating: F. Of course this is a failure as there isn’t anything to be praised here. It was the three of them doing a short, bad match and the big deal was Sharmell getting a mouth full of worms. There isn’t much else to it than that and the fact that this aired at Wrestlemania at any point after about 1991 tells you why it’s a failure.

We recap Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James for the Women’s Title. Mickie is a psycho who was obsessed with Trish (they never said the word lesbian but that’s what they were going for) but Trish wasn’t interested. Once Mickie was flat out turned down, she completely snapped and decided to take the Women’s Title instead. This feels like a big fight and that’s a good thing around here.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending. They fight over a lockup to start as JR tries to diagnose Mickie’s mental state. The Thesz press (JR: “Maybe the Louise Thesz press.”) puts Mickie down but she comes back with a kick, only to be thrown into the splits. A baseball slide puts Mickie on the floor but Trish kicks the post by mistake. Mickie wraps the leg around the post in a smart move and there’s a dropkick to the knee to make it worse.

The fans get behind Mickie and she wraps the leg around the ropes. The half crab goes on before it’s time to stomp on the leg in the corner. Mickie stops to soak in the cheers and bends the leg some more. This time Trish reverses into the spinning anklescissors but the fans aren’t happy with the comeback. The Stratusphere is countered with another slam of the leg to the mat as Lawler notices that Mickie’s skirt isn’t the most functional in a match.

Trish comes back with a Stratusfaction attempt but Mickie grabs her between the legs (on the Network) and licks her own hand (not on the Network) as JR loses it. Mickie tries the Stratusfaction but she either leaves it short or Trish can’t hold her on the knee, meaning they botch it horribly (also not on the Network). Mickie settles for the Chick Kick for the pin and the title. JR: “THE NUT JOB HAS WON THE TITLE!”

Rating: B-. This was getting really good near the end but then the botch happened and it stopped everything cold. The leg stuff was good and while it would have made more sense to have Trish’s knee give out when she was trying the Stratusfaction, it worked for a story in the match as Mickie knew how to break the thing down. More importantly though, Mickie FINALLY ends Trish’s year long plus reign and becomes the new star, which is long overdue. They needed to have the title change here as Trish had run out of gas a long time ago but it wasn’t like she had anyone good enough to drop it to.

Vince McMahons has the rest of the family drop to their knees in prayer before his match with Shawn. Vince: “God, let’s face it. I don’t like you, and you don’t like me.” Vince praises his own physique and promises to end Shawn.

Mark Henry vs. Undertaker

Casket match and the druids take their time wheeling the casket to ringside. Undertaker does the full entrance and Henry manages to keep glaring at him before jumping him to start things off. Some running clotheslines don’t do much to Henry so he runs Undertaker over with a single shot. They head outside with both guys going head first into the steps. The fans are in am ore traditional role here with the Undertaker cheers, which are cut off when Henry blocks Old School.

A low blow saves Undertaker from going into the casket and now it’s time to go after the arm. Old School connects this time but he still can’t get Henry down. Henry runs him over again but misses the running crotch attack and gets dropped into the casket. Undertaker follows him in and the lid closes before opening up with Undertaker’s hand around Henry’ throat.

They get back inside with Henry hitting the World’s Strongest Slam and covering because he isn’t that bright. Speaking of not that bright, Henry hammers away in the corner but gets planted with the Last Ride. Undertaker throws him onto and over the casket, setting up the Taker Dive (which barely clears the casket). Back in and a pretty impressive Tombstone lets Undertaker put him in the casket for the win.

Rating: D. Another one which didn’t work so well, mainly because there was no drama. Who was believing that Mark Henry was going to be the one to break the Streak? The Taker Dive and Tombstone both looked great but there isn’t much of a way around the fact that it was Mark Henry trying to break the Streak. It had no drama and wasn’t even that long, leaving this near the bottom end of the Streak (at least once it became a big deal).

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon. Shawn told Vince that it was time to get over the Montreal Screwjob and grow up so Vince decided to destroy Shawn once and for all. He has done a great job of making Shawn miserable and now it is time for Shawn to FINALLY get his hands on Vince in a no holds barred match.

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

No Holds Barred and there is a big framed copy of Vince’s Muscle and Fitness Magazine at ringside. Shawn jumps him to start and sends him into JR as the WE WANT BRET chants begin. The framed magazine goes around Vince’s head and Shawn is all ticked off. Cue the Spirit Squad to beat Shawn down though and hit the five man toss into the air. JR: “Someone get the hook!” Shawn gets their megaphone (which is smoking/powdery for some reason) and beats them down though, which sends them off for some reason.

Vince, now bleeding above the eye, gets in a clothesline to take over and it’s time to choke in the corner. The leather belt rips Shawn’s back up and it’s time to choke. Vince actually tunes up the band but Shawn blocks the kick (which had height but was nowhere near the right form) and hammers away. JR: “How are your stock dividends now???” The top rope elbow connects but here’s Shane with a kendo stick to take Shawn down. Always one to rub it in, Vince drops his pants but Shawn puts Shane’s face into it instead, followed by a low blow to Vince.

A clothesline puts Shane on the floor but that’s not enough, as Shawn handcuffs Shane to the rope. The Shane dance sets up a bunch of kendo stick shots to Shane and there’s a heck of a chair shot to Vince’s head. Lawler: “CUBS WIN! CUBS WIN!” Vince is busted open and Shawn tunes up the band….before stopping cold. Instead he goes outside and grabs a ladder, which goes straight into Vince’s forehead.

Shawn still won’t cover as he grabs some trashcans and a table instead, even shoving Shane away to get to them. The trashcan to the head drops Vince again and Shawn goes up the ladder. Then he climbs back down and pulls out the BIG ladder. Shawn climbs again, does the suck it sign, and elbows Vince through the table for the huge crash. Medics bring a stretcher out but Shawn scares them off, stands Vince up, yells a lot, and finishes with the superkick.

Rating: C+. Of course it’s junk as an actual match, but this was exactly what they set it up to be. There is no reason to believe that Vince can hang with Shawn in a regular match so he didn’t really come close. Vince brought in a bunch of people, Shawn beat them up and then the beating began. Shawn destroyed him completely (or at least until the next night on Raw, or maybe a week later if they’re feeling generous) and it made sense. Might have gone a little long, but it was the logical way to go.

Post match Vince is taken out on a stretcher and still flips Shawn off. Cole talks about how Shawn promised to never go back to his old self but did it here. Not exactly, as it was just Shawn being violent and aggressive, which isn’t quite what they were talking about on the way here.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle for the Smackdown World Title. Rey won the Royal Rumble to earn the title shot but Orton talked enough trash to get him to put the shot on the line at No Way Out. Orton cheated to win, but Teddy Long put Rey in the match too, making it a triple threat.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Randy Orton vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending and POD plays Rey, in an Aztec warrior costume this year, to the ring. Orton jumps Angle with the belt before the bell to start but Angle is right back in with a German suplex to Orton, plus a double German to both of them at once (with Rey flying through the air). An overhead belly to belly takes Orton over as well but Rey sends Angle face first into Orton’s crotch.

Angle is fine enough to send Rey up for a super hurricanrana to Orton before throwing Rey outside. Rey breaks up the ankle lock attempt and kicks Angle in the head for two as the fans are split between Rey and Kurt. The 619 is countered into the ankle lock and Rey taps (less than four minutes in) but the referee is with Orton. The German suplexes take down both challengers and an Angle Slam to the floor drops Rey in a heap. That means an ankle lock to Orton but this time Rey grabs the referee so he can’t see a tap.

Rey Drops the Dime on Angle but gets knocked outside again. The RKO connects for a delayed two on Angle and Randy goes up top, earning himself the running belly to belly superplex. Rey is back in with the springboard seated senton for two more on Angle and Orton is back in to kick Angle to the floor. The powerbomb neckbreaker gets two on Rey but the RKO takes too long, allowing Angle to come back in with the Angle Slam on Orton. Rey slips out of the Angle Slam and armdrags Angle to the floor. That leaves Orton to be dropkicked into the ropes for the 619 into the West Coast Pop for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. This is still one of the more perplexing big matches in Wrestlemania history as it had no real structure other than them doing moves to each other. Nothing was built up, nothing set up the finish and Rey just pinned Orton to win. It was fine as it was, but I was expecting a lot more, including more time as it didn’t even last ten minutes.

Post match the Guerreros come out to celebrate with Rey.

JR and the King talk about HHH and John Cena being ready for tonight. They needed two minutes for this instead of the other World Title match? Ah right: they needed to put a bed and pillows in the ring. Great way to use the Wrestlemania time.

Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle

It’s the annual Playboy match pillow fight so JR talks about Frank Gotch gate records in Chicago during the entrances. They to to the bed to start and then hit the catfighting. Torrie turns the bed over on her and then puts her dog on Candice’s face. Candice loses her dress and then puts on a headscissors over the ropes while bending backwards over the ropes. A middle rope elbow hits Torrie on the bed and it’s time to cut Torrie out of her dress. Candice pulls out her Playboy but gets rolled up for the pin.

Rating: D-. Yeah this happened and that’s about all there is to say about it. They were there to promote Playboy and it worked well enough, even though the Playboy Diva is usually a face and someone who wins but not quite this time around. It wasn’t exactly a match of course, but why would you expect anything else?

We see clips of the Wrestlemania press conference, with HHH saying the match against John Cena will be easy and Cena saying not so fast. HHH won a tournament to get the shot so there isn’t much of a story.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

Cena is defending and HHH, sitting on a throne in a Thor/Conan motif (the announcers say Conan but he had a big hammer), rises out from the stage. Cena on the other hand comes out after a gangster video and following an old car, complete with CM Punk as a machine gun toting gangster in one of the more well known Before They Were Famous cameos. Still as close as he ever got to the Wrestlemania main event. We get an old school weapons check as JR puts over the idea of the grunt vs. the seasons, trained professional to give us a good story to the match.

They fight over the arm control to start and Cena is sent into the corner for some frustration. The fans are almost entirely behind HHH here, or at least the loud ones are. The FU doesn’t work and they stare each other down again. Cena is sent outside for a big cheer but he comes back in to slug away. A backdrop gives Cena two and the fisherman’s suplex gets the same.

We’re already into the chinlock as the fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle. There’s the big whip over the corner to send HHH to the floor and another backdrop puts him on the ramp. Back in and HHH hits the jumping knee for a positive reaction as commentary keeps talking about the crowd reactions. HHH whips him hard into the steps and the fans even pop for him breaking the count.

Back in again and the facebuster into a running clothesline gets two on Cena, with JR calling it a slobberknocker. A pair of neckbreakers gets two more and we hit the neck crank. HHH switches to a sleeper and then a chinlock as JR gets the World Title wrong and has to apologize to Rey Mysterio. Cena fights up and hits his own clothesline before winning the slugout. There’s a powerslam and Cena initiates the finishing sequence but the Shuffle is countered with a spinebuster for two more. Another sleeper is countered into a belly to back suplex and it’s the Shuffle into the STFU.

HHH finally makes the rope and escapes the FU before sending Cena into the referee in the corner. That means a low blow to both of them, meaning HHH can give us the crotch chop. It’s sledgehammer time and Cena is knocked silly for a delayed two. The FU gets the same and the fans are popping hard on these near falls. Cena misses a high crossbody so HHH tries the Pedigree but Cena pulls him into the STFU, even trapping the arm so HHH can’t make the rope. It takes some time but HHH finally taps and Cena retains.

Rating: A-. That’s the ultimate achievement on Raw and the win that Cena really needed to become THE guy. He had been champion for almost a year straight but still felt somewhat like someone who hadn’t made it all the way to the top yet. Cena had been the guy, but he wasn’t THE guy until this one and that’s a big change.

The match itself was great as you would expect from these two on the big stage. They played up the idea that Cena was in over his head but ground out another win as he tends to do. Cena was getting better at the big matches around this point and of course that would become one of his calling cards down the line. This worked well and felt like a Wrestlemania main event as the company is now Cena’s, which is what matters most.

The celebration and five minute highlight package wraps us up.

Overall Rating: B-. Just like it did in the buildup, Raw annihilated Smackdown here with the two matches that made the show and a lot of other good stuff in between (plus winning Money in the Bank). Edge vs. Foley and the main event certainly deliver, but the rest of the show isn’t anything great. There are some really bad parts on here but the rest is good enough. That may sound good, but I’d like a little more than “good enough” for Wrestlemania.

The biggest problem here is that there really aren’t many blow away moments. Cena winning was more of a long term deal, Rey winning the title felt more like Eddie’s big farewell, Money in the Bank is all about the future and Trish finally losing is hardly top tier stuff. Shawn getting the win against Vince was nice to see, but that middle finger after the match doesn’t make it seem like a blowoff. The problem here is Smackdown, as there wasn’t much of note other than Rey’s title win. It was a one sided show between the two brands and when the show is built around both, it doesn’t work so well, Good, but forgettable.

 

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Smackdown – September 28, 2007: An Off Week

Smackdown
Date: September 28, 2007
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re just over a week away from No Mercy and the big Smackdown match is going to be Batista defending the World Title against the Great Khali inside the Punjabi Prison. I’m sure that won’t be a complete disaster as Khali can barely get through a regular match, but stranger things have happened. Now to build the rest of the show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.We open with a recap of last week’s wedding between Teddy Long and Kristal, capped off by the traditional groom’s heart attack.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Vince McMahon and tells him that Teddy has been in a coma for a week and has a history of heart disease. Vince says the show must go on and makes Vickie the new General Manager. Vickie leaves so here is Finlay, who has some things in common with McMahon. They’re both Irish, but they also both have to deal with Hornswoggle. They’ll work on that later.

Opening sequence.

Victoria vs. Torrie Wilson

Victoria takes her down into a front facelock to start as we hear about various things involving looking at Torrie. Back up and Torrie sends her into the ropes and grabs a rollup for two. Cole talks about how much Torrie has improved in the ring but JBL says who cares as long as we can look at her. A snap suplex gives Victoria two but Torrie is back with a headscissors and clothesline. Torrie tries a sunset flip out of the corner but Victoria sits down on it and grabs the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t much of a match, but Cole is right that Torrie has improved in the ring. She’s never going to be the top worker in the division, but she can work a decent enough basic match. The match wasn’t terrible and given how some of the division can be, this was at least passable.

Post match another blonde (looks a good bit like Torrie) comes in and stomps Torrie down, before bending her back around the post to leave her laying.

It’s time for MVP’s VIP Lounge, complete with a bunch of people sitting in on the set. MVP talks about Teddy Long having a heart attack after bringing so much heartache to WWE. Long’s biggest accomplishment is bringing MVP to WWE with this big of a contract and that is because he is better than everyone else. Tonight happens to be a special night for MVP, because it is his one year anniversary around here.

Now he has captured the Tag Team Titles with Matt Hardy…who comes out to interrupt, complete with a gold bottle. Matt acknowledges that even though it isn’t his thing, the VIP Lounge is a big deal. That being said, he knew he had to be here because MVP is his partner and his homie. Matt even has a gift for him in the form of a highlight video of MVP’s first year in WWE. You can imagine all of the horrible things that happen to MVP in said video, which is complete with a lame pop song.

MVP snaps about the video but Matt says he was just ribbing him. Matt calms him down with the bottle, which is popped open and poured, which has MVP calmed down a bit. The toast though sees Matt insulting MVP, who throws Matt out. Hold on though as Matt has one more gift: MVP gets to face Kane tonight!

Chuck Palumbo vs. Kenny Dykstra

Dykstra kicks him down and fires off some boots to the back before we hit the chinlock. Palumbo fights up with an elbow to the face and a backdrop as the pace picks up fast. A middle rope dive is countered into an overhead belly to belly to send Dykstra flying. The Full Throttle finishes for Palumbo in a hurry.

Rating: D+. It was another short match that didn’t have time to go anywhere, but what were you expecting from Palumbo vs. Dykstra? This match wasn’t designed to be some kind of a classic, though it isn’t a good sign when it is the second match in a row that would fit that description. Palumbo isn’t going very far around here, but he’s good enough for a lower card guy.

Steve Austin still things the Marine is pretty snazzy.

Jesse and Festus are ready to debut next week, with Jesse promising Festus will come to life when the bell rings.

Commentary explains the Punjabi Prison and look at Great Khali destroying Batista.

Batista joins us in the back for an interview and says he has no idea how a Punjabi Prison match works. JBL interprets this as him being scared but Batista says Khali will have to take the title from his cold, dead hands. The champ didn’t have much to say here.

Kane vs. MVP

Non-title and MVP starts by cranking on the arm, only to get thrown down by straight power. Some uppercuts in the corner look to set up the big boot but MVP bails to the floor for a breather. That’s enough for MVP to snap Kane’s throat across the top but Kane runs him over again. Kane charges into an elbow in the corner though and a suplex is countered into a DDT to give MVP two.

A neckbreaker gets two more and we hit the…neck pull? Either way, MVP lets him go and Kane is back up with an elbow to the face. The top rope clothesline misses though and MVP gets two more. We hit the arm crank for a bit before Kane is back up and kicking away at the ribs. The chokeslam is blocked and they hit heads for a double knockdown and a break.

Back with MVP cranking on both arms before a running boot in the corner connects for another two. Some running corner clotheslines into the side slam give Kane two of his own but MVP breaks up another top rope clothesline. The break up is broken up though and now the clothesline can connect. The chokeslam is loaded up but MVP kicks him low for the DQ.

Rating: B. This started to roll near the end as MVP kept cutting off everything Kane threw at him. It was a question of how long MVP could hang in there before Kane finally caught him with something, which caused MVP to wrap it up with the DQ. Kane is having a rather nice run at the moment and I can always go for more of his good version.

The Diva Search girls had a limbo contest with Taryn winning. Lyndy is eliminated, crushing the dreams of dozens.

JBL brings out Rey Mysterio for an interview. He looks down at Rey and says Rey’s machismo is flat out stupidity, but Rey asks what’s up with the hatred. Does it bug JBL when he is here interviewing Rey instead of someone interviewing him? OF COURSE IT DOES, because JBL has twice the talent as Rey. That’s cool with Mysterio, who tells JBL to put up or shut up. JBL brings up Rey’s match against Great Khali next week and shoves him down, only to have Rey come back. The 619 is loaded up but here is Finlay with the Shillelagh to knock Rey cold.

Hornswoggle is in Vickie Guerrero’s office, where Vickie says that the Cruiserweight Title is making him a target. It’s even worse because he is now a McMahon, so she is making him abdicate the title. Hornswoggle hands it over, and that’s that for the belt. Fair enough, as it isn’t like the title has meant anything in years.

Jamie Noble vs. Shannon Moore

They start fast and head outside, with Moore sending him back first into the apron. Noble takes him off the top and grabs the Boston crab, sending Moore straight to the ropes. A swinging neckbreaker gets Moore out of trouble and a legdrop gives him two. Noble is back with something like a reverse Alabama Slam out of the corner, setting up a gutbuster for the pin.

Rating: C. Commentary kept hyping up the future of the cruiserweight division and if this is as good as it gets, they can’t get rid of the title fast enough. The division has not mattered for years now and the Hornswoggle reign was all the proof you could have needed. This was another completely watchable match, albeit one that felt like it meant a grand total of nothing.

Great Khali, through Runjin Singh, promises to get the title back from Batista.

No Mercy rundown.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Henry goes straight to the floor to start (and might have gotten his leg caught in the ropes on the way out) and the fight is on. Back in and Undertaker gets up a boot in the corner before striking away. Old School is pulled out of the air and it’s Henry getting to hammer away even more. Undertaker sits up to avoid a big elbow though and there’s the jumping clothesline. The chokeslam finishes Henry quick.

Rating: C-. This felt like a way to write Henry off of the show for awhile as Undertaker shrugged off most of what Henry threw at him and then beat him with the chokeslam. I’m not sure what is next for Henry, but beating a monster like this is not the best sign for his future. Undertaker is probably back in the title picture sooner rather than later, as it is hard to keep him away from the belt for that long.

Overall Rating: D+. This was one of the lamer Smackdowns in a long time as it felt like everyone was taking a week off. The only star power was Undertaker vs. Mark Henry in a match that felt like a post show dark match wound up on television. Maybe they were just taking a week off here, but there was almost nothing worth seeing here outside of Kane vs. MVP. I’d like to believe it’s a one off situation, but this wasn’t a good show.

 

 

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Smackdown – August 24, 2007: The Safety Is On

Smackdown
Date: August 24, 2007
Location: Colonial Center, Columbia, South Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Summerslam and the question remains who can stop Great Khali. Batista gets his chance in two days but things are not exactly looking great for him. Other than that, Vince McMahon and Jonathan Coachman continue their search for Vince’s son, meaning hijinks are likely to continue. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the end of last week’s show, with Great Khali Clawing/head vicing Batista down again.

Opening sequence.

Here are Vince McMahon and Coach for a chat. They are continuing their investigation into Vince’s illegitimate son and the search is continuing tonight. Coach wants to look at things scientifically and asks what we know about Vince. We know that he is tall, he is powerful and he likes to make people’s lives h***. No one is like that around here…and here is Kane to interrupt. Kane smiles at Vince, who says there is no way this monster is his son. Coach: “He does appear to have your eye.”

Kane talks about how Vince was not there for him as a kid when Kane started his first fire or killed his first squirrel. That being said, all Kane wants is Finlay, which seems to please Vince. After making sure Kane doesn’t want his money, Vince makes Kane vs. Finlay for Summerslam, which works just fine.

Cue Chris Masters to say he has proof that he is Vince’s son. First of all, Kane is too ugly to be Vince’s son (that’s good for a glare from Kane), plus a photo of Masters meeting Vince when he was fifteen (Vince: “You look ten.). Masters is willing to prove himself with the Masterlock Challenge right now, with Kane agreeing. Kane is a bit too big though and Masters can’t get the hold, so he offers to put Masters in the hold himself. That just earns Masters a chokeslam and Kane leaves. Cue Chuck Palumbo, and since we have a referee and two wrestlers, Vince says ring the bell.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Chris Masters

Palumbo punches away to start and hits a clothesline to drop Masters again. Masters get sin a cheap shot and a slam, only to walk into an overhead belly to belly. Full Throttle finishes for Palumbo.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Funaki

Chavo still has Rey Mysterio’s mask, which is on a mannequin head this week. A slam and an uppercut have Funaki in early trouble but he manages a quick shot of his own. Chavo crotches him on top though and we’re back to the stomping. Funaki’s knee is wrapped around the post and Chavo cranks on it so much that the referee calls for the DQ.

Post match Chavo keeps beating Funaki down as WWE desperately tries to get us to believe that Chavo Guerrero is a threat to a returning Rey Mysterio. They’re doing everything right with the actions and violence, but it’s still Chavo Guerrero. Chavo puts the Rey mask on Funaki and crushes his leg with a chair. Fans: “CHAVO SUCKS!’’ Chavo: “REY MYSTERIO SUCKS!!!”

Rey Mysterio video.

Jamie Noble vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

For the #1 contendership to the Cruiserweight Title as we continue to protect most of the wrestlers on Summerslam. Yang kicks him down without much trouble and hits an early standing moonsault. Back up and Noble hits him in the face, setting up a waistlock to work on the ribs. That’s countered with a catapult to send Noble into the corner and a top rope hurricanrana gives Yang two. The top rope moonsault press misses though and Noble’s fireman’s carry gutbuster ends the battle of the Jung Dragons.

Post match Noble dives under the ring to find Hornswoggle but finds…no one. As Noble leaves, Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring.

We look at Evander Holyfield vs. Matt Hardy in a boxing match at Saturday Night’s Main Event until Holyfield got sick of MVP telling him to hurt Hardy even more.

Teddy Long doesn’t get to see Kristal in her swimsuit before tonight’s contest but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP talks about how great he is and how he could win any title. He could even win the Tag Team Titles with Teddy’s grandmother, or whoever else walks into this office. Cue Matt Hardy and arguing ensues after the announcement of the Tag Team Title match next week.

Vince McMahon and Coach come up to Chuck Palumbo, next to his motorcycle. After explaining that it’s Mr. McMahon, they talk about their love of bikes, but don’t worry because Palumbo knows who his dad is. One day his dad had a bit too much to drink and drove his bike into an 18 wheeler. Coach says they’re so sorry. Palumbo: “Not as sorry as my mom. She was driving the 18 wheeler.” Coach and Vince awkwardly leave.

Deuce N Domino vs. Eugene/Shannon Moore

Non-title and Deuce N Domino have Cherry with them. Eugene works on Deuce’s arm to start and hands it off to Shannon for the same. A Whisper in the Wind is pulled off the top though and it’s Domino getting to stomp away. That doesn’t last long as it’s back to Eugene to clean at least a few rooms. Eugene backdrops Moore onto Domino but Deuce kicks him in the face for the fast pin.

HHH is back at Summerslam.

And now, Matt Hardy and MVP play basketball. It’s first to eleven wins and yes this is non-title. Before the game, MVP brags about how good he is, misses a shot, and then dunks to make it better. MVP: “This is one I picked up when I was hanging out in the ski lodge with Kobe.” Matt finally comes out to interrupt, hits him in the head with the ball and scores, only to have Deuce N Domino come in to beat them both down.

Mark Henry vs. Brad Allen

Allen is sent into the post, powerslammed and bearhugged for the easy win.

Post match, Henry wants to know what is up with the Undertaker symbolism, like THE SAND! Undertaker’s video appears again and this time someone finds a box buried in the sand. There are a bunch of snakes inside, plus the Undertaker’s symbol. Henry is panicked.

Raw Rebound.

Michael Cole is in the ring to introduce a Summerslam bikini contest between Kristal, Torrie Wilson, Michelle McCool and Victoria. They all disrobe, Victoria dances badly and…we have a surprise entrant: South Carolina’s own Mae Young! Mae disrobes, has to be held back from disrobing further, and wins.

Jesse and Festus love barbecue, with Festus being great at grilling steak tartar. Cole calls them the Daltons, which I don’t believe has been used since they started these vignettes.

Summerslam rundown.

We see the opening vignette again, as Great Khali is still the big monster.

Batista vs. Finlay

Batista shoves him around to start, which might be due to Finlay not being able to see through the smoke from Batista’s pyro. Finlay gets in a few shots of his own to knock him outside. That means a quick posting and here is Great Khali to watch as we take a break. Back with Finlay holding him in something like a Crossface until Batista Stuns his way to freedom.

Finlay actually hits a dropkick to cut him off again but Batista fights up even faster this time. They head outside with Batista loading up the announcers’ table, only to get caught with a hanging neckbreaker on the way back in. The swinging Boss Man Slam plants Finlay again but Khali comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was the usual power match with Finlay being a good villain to go after Batista. The ending was not that much of a surprise and that’s ok in this case, though having Khali come out made the ending a bit more obvious. I can get why you don’t have Batista or Finlay lose so close to Summerslam, but it wasn’t the most thrilling way to go.

Post match Khali chops Batista down but can’t get the vice grip. Instead, Batista spears him down and hammers away until Finlay makes the save. Batista fights back again and pounds on Khali again until referees break it up. Well try to at least as Batista gets away to slug Khali down again. Khali staggers away to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I know what they were going for with this show but it was one of the weakest shows they have done in a long time. This was a bunch of low level stars having matches that didn’t have many interesting stories. There were a few minor things going on, but this was a totally skippable show, which isn’t a good way to get me to care about what is coming this weekend.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – August 10, 2007: They Missed, Badly

Smackdown
Date: August 10, 2007
Location: Chevrolet Center, Youngstown, Ohio
Attendance: 3,700
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re closing in on Summerslam and the main event is set, with Batista challenging Great Khali for the World Title. That may be a problem for Batista, as Khali debuted a Claw hold, which could cause quite the damage. The rest of the card could use some attention though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Batista vs. Domino

They’re starting fast this week and Deuce and Cherry are here with Domino. Batista knees him in the ribs as the smoke from Batista’s pyro is still filling the arena. A suplex gives Batista two but it’s too early for the Batista Bomb. Back up Cherry’s distraction does absolutely nothing as Batista takes Deuce N Domino out with ease. The spear into the Batista Bomb is good for the easy pin. On Domino.

Rating: C-. Total squash and that’s what it should have been. It would have been nice to not see a champion lose this way, but it isn’t like there are any other tag teams worth beating up around here. Batista didn’t break a sweat here and that made for an entertaining enough destruction.

Post match Deuce tries to jump Batista and gets wrecked as well. Great Khali pops up on screen to yell at Batista, who won’t be celebrating at Summerslam. We see a clip of Khali Clawing Ric Flair last week to knock him out.

Here is the returning Rey Mysterio, whose knee surgery must have been a success as he is about four inches taller now. Whoever it is seems to be a big Chavo Guerrero fan because he doesn’t know if Rey can beat Chavo at Summerslam. Or if he can even face Chavo, because Chavo is that amazing. He gets on his knees to beg Chavo to avoid that kind of a beating again but here is Eugene to interrupt.

Eugene vs. “Rey Mysterio”

The fans think Chavo sucks and it’s a headscissors to take Eugene down to start. The 619 misses and believe it or not, it’s Chavo under the mask. Eugene is so offended by the deception that he starts hammering away and hits a Gory Bomb, followed by Three Amigos. The frog splash takes too long though and Chavo moves, allowing him to hit his own for the pin.

Rating: D+. They didn’t bother trying to take this one too far as there is only so much you can get out of this kind of a match. It was also a match where the copying moves made sense, but Eugene is so far beyond meaning anything that it is hard to believe that he was kind of a big thing at one point. Chavo is on his way to the big showdown with Rey and that should work out well for both of them.

Kenny Dykstra kisses Victoria as she is getting her makeup done when Michelle McCool comes in to tell them to get a room. Violence is teased.

Raw Rebound.

Mark Henry vs. Sterling Keenan

Keenan is better known as Corey Graves. Bearhug finishes for Henry in about a minute.

Post match Henry says no one will mess with him because of this, sending us to a video of him attacking Undertaker. As the beating is on, we cut to an Undertaker vignette, with the word “Unforgiven” being heard. Back in the arena, a man in black walks away from the ring and his footprints are rather prominent.

Torrie Wilson vs. Victoria

Jimmy Wang Yang and Kenny Dykstra are here. Victoria jumps her to start and takes it to the floor. That means Yang has to dropkick Dykstra down as Torrie is scared. Back in and the Widow’s Peak finishes Torrie in a hurry.

Post match the beating stays on but Michelle McCool runs in for the save.

We recap Matt Hardy beating MVP in arm wrestling and regular wrestling last week.

Commentary tells us that thanks to the Wellness Policy, MVP found out that he had a heart condition and has had surgery, but will be back in a week.

MVP complains about how his heart was messed up last week but Matt Hardy cheated to beat him anyway. It would usually take someone a year to return but he’ll do it in a week because he is half man and half amazing.

Matt Hardy vs. Finlay

Finlay points a finger in his face to start and they take their time to start. A headlock and shoulder have Matt in early trouble so he grabs a headlock of his own. Commentary talks about Mr. McMahon’s illegitimate child (ok fair enough) as Matt hits Finlay in the face for two. Hold on though as Finlay complains of an eye poke, which naturally is a way to sucker Matt in for some uppercuts.

Back up and Finlay charges into a boot in the corner but manages to send Matt hard to the floor. They fight over a ram into the apron so Matt gets posted as we take a break. We come back with Finlay staying on the arm that went into the post, including kicking away at the shoulder. The cranking begins on the arm but the referee is smart enough to see the feet in the ropes. Good of him for doing his job for once.

Back up and Matt hits an elbow to the face, only to get taken down into another armbar. The arm is slammed onto the apron before Finlay goes with the armbar again. Back up and Finlay forearms away in the corner but Matt slugs him down. The middle rope elbow to the back connects and the Side Effect gets two. Finlay fights back but here is Hornswoggle at ringside. Finlay brings him inside but Jamie Noble comes out to chase Hornswoggle off. Finlay goes to rescue Hornswoggle….and it’s a countout.

Rating: C+. This felt like they had set up a joke for seventeen minutes and then forgot the punchline. They set up everything with Hardy’s arm being banged up and then just let it end in the middle of his comeback? Instead of managing to beat Finlay with one arm, it was like they were saying “close enough, we’re done”. This had me really confused and disappointed, even though the rest of it was rather good.

In the back, Jamie Noble asks Kid Kash and Funaki where Hornswoggle is. Finlay comes in and grabs Noble, telling him to stay away from Hornswoggle. Noble says this is three on one….but Kane pops up behind them and beats up Finlay.

Kane vs. Sylvan

Sylvan rants in French until the fire cuts him off. Kane sends him flying into the corner and hammers away without much trouble. The chinlock goes on for a bit but Sylvan cuts off a charge in the corner. Kane hits a big boot though and the top rope clothesline sets up the chokeslam for the easy win.

Post match Finlay runs in and beats Kane down with the shillelagh.

Teddy Long and Vickie Guerrero talk about Teddy’s wedding and gives him some Viagra as a wedding present.

Here is Chris Masters for the Masterlock Challenge to anyone in the crowd. A rather large fan is goaded into it, but says he has played football, wrestled…..and just got out of prison for manslaughter. With that, Masters picks another fan, who he easily beats. I’m still not sure why this is supposed to be interesting, especially after someone already broke the hold.

Batista tells Ric Flair to be careful against Great Khali, but Flair is mad over being rag dolled last week. He’s felt the Claw from other people before and now it is time for a Figure Four on Khali.

Ric Flair vs. Great Khali

Non-title. Flair chops away to start and is tossed to the ground for his efforts. The nerve hold goes on for a good while, followed by the big chop and a big boot. Flair manages a low blow and chops away, with Khali going down to a knee. Then Khali grabs the Claw to finish Flair without much trouble.

Rating: D. This was as good as Khali nerve holding Flair for about a minute and a half was going to be. The Claw is a fine way for someone with Khali’s hands to go, but you need something other than that. The problem is he can’t do much more and this was a bad example of how limited he really is.

Post match the Claw stays on so Batista runs in for the save. Khali Claws Batista down to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I don’t remember the last time Smackdown came up with such a bad show as this was rather awful. There was nothing on here that you would need to see and the best match, between Hardy and Finlay, has one of the more disappointing endings I have heard of in a long time. This didn’t make me want to see Summerslam and it was one of the weakest shows WWE has put on in a long time.

 

 

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Royal Rumble 2003 (2017 Redo): The Rookie Phenom

Royal Rumble 2003
Date: January 19, 2003
Location: Fleet Center, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 15,338
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is a really odd entry in the series as the namesake match is being treated as secondary to almost everything else. Really, coming into this show, there’s a good argument to be made that Torrie Wilson vs. Dawn Marie is being treated as a bigger deal than the Rumble itself. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is your standard montage of wrestlers talking about what it means to go to Wrestlemania because the road starts tonight.

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

The winner is in the Rumble and the loser is out in the cold. They do the customary exchange of shoves to start with the fans almost entirely behind Lesnar. Brock drives him into the corner to little avail but the belly to belly works a bit better. A second works just as well but the third is countered with a scary toss over the top. Back in and we hit the choke, which you can tell is serious because Cole starts talking about Show’s shoe size.

Brock comes right back with the release German suplex but Heyman offers a distraction to break things up. A big boot and side slam drop Lesnar for all of ten seconds before he’s back up with an other belly to belly. Cue Heyman but he gets caught in an F5 attempt, only to have Show make the save with a chokeslam for two. A second attempt is countered into a sloppy F5 to send Lesnar to the Rumble.

Rating: D+. It was short (less than seven minutes) and had the only possible ending (it’s not like there are many other potential Rumble winners) so it’s hard to complain that much. The F5 didn’t look great but it was how the match should have ended. This probably needs to be about it for Big Show as a main event guy but you know that’s not going to be the case, which is part of the problem on Smackdown.

Chris Jericho is ready to win the Rumble and gets his World Title back at Wrestlemania.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. William Regal/Lance Storm

Regal and Storm are defending. Bubba punches Storm in the corner to start and hits something like a spinebuster. To really mix things up, Bubba grabs a leglock for a few seconds before handing it off to D-Von. Regal comes in and gets punched as well as this isn’t exactly shaking the feeling that it’s a glorified Raw match. The champs take over on D-Von with Storm drop toeholding him down into a sliding knee from Regal (nice spot).

We hit the cravate for a bit and a chinlock keeps D-Von in trouble. That doesn’t last long either though as D-Von fights up and makes the hot tag to Bubba for the house cleaning. Regal takes What’s Up but here’s Chief Morely for a distraction to prevent the 3D. It doesn’t quite work so well though as D-Von uses the distraction to grab Regal’s brass knuckles and knock Storm silly for the pin and the titles. Lawler: “I’m as confused as a baby in a topless bar.” He’s confused enough to refer to Regal as Steve.

Rating: C-. This was just a Raw match with a title change and considering Booker T. and Goldust never even got a rematch after losing the titles, I have no idea what the thinking here is. Were Booker and Goldust really that bad of a team? I know it’s a sin to get over without the company swearing off on it but it’s some of the oddest booking of the year.

House show ads. They didn’t edit this off the Network? I like having the complete versions but it’s a strange choice to keep in.

Nathan Jones vignette.

We get a long recap of the Al Wilson Saga, which still doesn’t make much sense and went on WAY too long if this is their big idea. Basically Dawn Marie decided she wanted to destroy Torrie Wilson’s life (I think?) by marrying Torrie’s father. She eventually went through with it but had so much, ahem, fun with Al on their honeymoon that he died.

Dawn blames Torrie for this and the match is on, even though it was booked before Al died. If this was all some big con by Dawn, what does she get out of it? Getting a match with Torrie? She seems upset and we haven’t gotten any scene of Dawn saying it was all made up so I guess we’re supposed to take it at face value. I know I harp on this a lot but I still don’t get how this was supposed to work.

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

Dawn is in regular ring gear and a black veil, which makes her look more like Jimmy Jack Funk (from the neck up) than anything else. Dawn elbows her in the face at the bell but Torrie takes her down as well as these two are going to be able to do. Torrie gets caught in a Fujiwara armbar as the announcers cover the story in detail. Well the recent part at least as basically everything after Armageddon has been forgotten at this point.

Dawn stays on the arm (that’ll teach Torrie for killing Dawn’s husband) and grabs a flapjack. They collide in a bad looking spot and the boring chants begin. Dawn actually hits a decent looking middle rope spinning clothesline, only to fall victim to that horrible swinging neckbreaker to give Torrie the pin.

Rating: F. Really, what else were you expecting here? The feud was as soap opera level as you’re going to have and the wrestlers are both models and little more. Somehow that’s about as much as you could have thought these two would do and hopefully it wraps up the story for good. I know it won’t but it would be nice.

Eric Bischoff and Stephanie McMahon run into each other in the back with Stephanie being smug about Eric’s thirty days to fix Raw deal. Eric asks if her job is safe too but she doesn’t seem worried, partially because she has her own surprise for Raw. As with most cases of both GM’s on screen at once, this was a big waste of time.

Sean O’Haire tells us not to go to church.

We recap Scott Steiner vs. HHH. Steiner showed up in November and was immediately shoved into the title picture but hasn’t actually had a match yet. Instead it’s been stuff like a posedown, a bench press contest (which didn’t happen), arm wrestling and a pushup contest. The idea is that Steiner can do everything HHH can and might also be completely insane. The fact that they’ve barely been allowed to get physical should be a bit worrisome but HHH wouldn’t let us down.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Scott Steiner

Steiner is challenging and HHH is in the ultra rare red trunks. Before the bell, Hebner holds up the title and insists that he’s the law around here no matter what. Steiner wins the early slugout and chops away in the corner, followed by the gorilla press to send HHH rolling to the floor. The champ’s back is sent into the post a few times and a hard Irish whip makes his back even worse.

We hit a Boston crab for a bit with HHH crawling to the ropes a few seconds later. That’s not very noteworthy, but Steiner falling over when the hold is broken isn’t the most encouraging sign. The facebuster is no sold and we hit a quickly broken bearhug. Steiner gets in the first belly to belly for two and Flair pulls him out to the floor.

Back in and Steiner charges into a boot to the face before being sent into the steps for good measure. HHH stomps and chokes in the corner with Flair adding choking of his own. Another neckbreaker gets two for the champ and you can see how winded Steiner already is. Flair chokes on the ropes again to fill in as much time as possible before Steiner reverses the Pedigree.

Scott catapults him into the buckle and grabs the second overhead suplex….before just collapsing next to the ropes. We’re not even nine minutes into the match and the guy can’t even stand up. Steiner picks him up for what looks like a Tombstone and you would think he was about to go into labor. HHH slips out and tries a Diamond Cutter but Steiner goes backwards with it like a regular neckbreaker. After all those years of working with Diamond Dallas Page he can’t take a standard face first bump?

You can hear the crowd losing their patience with this one. Flair plays cheerleader and the fans actually cheer for HHH, who may be boring but he’s at least looking competent here. The champ dives into another overhead suplex but Steiner still can’t follow up. Some Steiner Lines set up suplexes four, five and six, followed by a spinning version for two.

Steiner tries a tiger bomb and falls down, drawing straight up booing from the fans. The announcers are trying as hard as they can to make Steiner sound like a threat here and it’s going as badly as you would expect. HHH heads up top so it’s a superplex for two more. That’s enough to send HHH and Flair up the aisle but Steiner isn’t done yet and drags them back. As lame as an ending as that would be, it was the right call at this point.

A belt shot to HHH’s head draws some blood and they continue to stagger around ringside with no idea what to do. Another belly to belly (ninth suplex total) sends HHH outside again and they brawl into the crowd because THIS MATCH JUST CAN’T END. Back in again with Steiner doing the pushups and laboring through some right hands in the corner. Now Flair tries to get the referee to stop the match but the referee keeps going because he’s that kind of evil.

Steiner hates the match as much as everyone else does so he throws Hebner outside but THAT’S NOT A DQ EITHER. The tenth suplex gets two and you can see Steiner looking desperate. HHH gets in a low blow and rolls Steiner up for two. That’s FINALLY enough for HHH as he grabs sledgehammer and hits Scott in the ribs for the DQ, earning a chorus of boos that would make Roman Reigns proud.

Rating: N. For Not HHH’s Fault. For once, this can’t be blamed on HHH, who was just stuck in a horrible situation and couldn’t do anything with it. To be fair though, no one was going to be able to get anything passable out of this mess. Steiner wasn’t ready for this match and had no business going more than five minutes, let alone eighteen. The interesting thing here though is the first eight minutes ran more than well enough. It was a boring start but it was nowhere near a disaster or even really bad. The problem is the second half of the match where EVERYTHING falls apart.

You’ll hear a lot of comparisons between this Steiner and Brock Lesnar’s Suplex City but the key is in the delivery. Lesnar suplexes the heck out of people and then pops up to do it again. Steiner was suplexing HHH here and then taking twenty seconds to get to his feet out of pure exhaustion. When you can see wrestlers go twenty minutes without even breathing hard, there’s no excuse for a main eventer nearly passing out from exhaustion in the first ten minutes. There’s a reason this is remembered so horribly and it more than lives down to its reputation.

Post match Steiner hits him with the sledgehammer and grabs the Steiner Recliner. JR: “There’s no way out of this hold.” In other words, yes they’re actually doing a rematch. Bischoff eventually comes out and gets Steiner off of HHH as the fans are so apathetic towards any of this.

We recap Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle. Kurt won the title with help from his new agent Paul Heyman, who also represents Big Show. Benoit beat Show to become the new #1 contender and you know this is going to be a classic no matter what. That being said, there’s not much of a secret to the fact that they’re building towards Lesnar vs. Angle at this point. At least we can have an incredible match on the way there.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is defending. Benoit has to deal with Team Angle to start so that’s a double ejection. Chris tries a very quick Sharpshooter (which Tazz calls a Boston crab for some reason), sending Angle outside for a breather. Back in and another leg hold sends Angle to the ropes as it seems that they have a long time here.

Benoit easily wins a battle of the chops and gets two off a clothesline to the back of the head. A DDT onto the apron makes things even worse but Angle rolls away from the Swan Dive. The Angle Slam is reversed though and we hit the Sharpshooter. Angle grabs the ropes as well as a belly to belly (after that last match, I’m surprised those weren’t banned like bar stools on Frasier) to really take over for the first time.

We hit the chinlock with a bodyscissors on Benoit for a bit before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Back up and they trade German suplexes with Benoit getting the better of it. Chris takes too long going up top though and Angle runs the corner for the belly to belly superplex. The Crossface goes on a few seconds later with Benoit switching to the ankle lock (that’s like a Bingo space in an Angle match).

Kurt’s ankle lock is reversed into the Crossface which is reversed into a rollup which is reversed right back into the Crossface. Angle gets to his feet for an Angle Slam but there’s no cover. There go the straps though and it’s back to the ankle lock. Benoit gets two off a rollup as the announcers are losing their minds (rightfully so).

Kurt is sick of this submission stuff and tries a German suplex, only to have Benoit reverse into a release version, drawing quite the round of applause. With Angle three quarters of the way across the ring, Benoit hits the best looking Swan Dive I’ve ever seen for a delayed two. Angle grabs a powerbomb but drops Benoit face first onto the buckle, followed by another Slam for two.

We’re right back to the Crossface but Angle rolls through into the ankle lock which can’t be reversed this time. Benoit kicks him away instead, only to get caught in the ankle lock again. Chris tries to pull him into the Crossface but Angle holds on and gets the grapevine to FINALLY make Benoit tap because he was beaten and he knew it.

Rating: A+. I’ve seen this match several times now and I’m still exhausted just watching it. These guys were beating the heck out of each other with everything looking anywhere from great to unbelievable (that Swan Dive in particular). This was outstanding stuff and one of the best wrestling matches I’ve ever seen. There’s also a bit of a HHH vs. Cactus Jack vibe to it with Angle being backed into a corner and having to fight, only to prove that he is indeed the better man, at least on this night. Check this out if you haven’t seen it in awhile, or just because it’s worth seeing multiple times.

After an Anthology ad, Benoit gets the big standing ovation, which probably should have sent him to a World Title shot (at least) at Wrestlemania. Instead it was a spot in a three way for the Tag Team Titles because that’s how WWE worked in 2003.

Rob Van Dam and Kane agree that it’s every man for himself tonight.

Royal Rumble

90 second intervals (though Fink says two minutes) with Shawn Michaels at #1 and Chris Jericho at #2. If nothing else, at least Shawn is starting to look like a wrestler again instead of the tiny thing he was back at Survivor Series. Actually hang on a second as it’s Christian in Jericho’s clothes instead of Chris himself. Cue Jericho from underneath the ring to hit Shawn low. One heck of a beatdown ensues with Jericho busting Shawn open with a chair as Christopher Nowinski is in at #3. He’s willing to stay on the floor while Jericho beats on Shawn some more and easily eliminates him.

Nowinski is still on the floor as Rey Mysterio is in at #4. Rey tries to speed things up and slips out of a gorilla press, only to get punched out to the apron. As usual, Jericho celebrates early and gets dropkicked into the ropes. Nowinski FINALLY gets in and it’s Edge in at #5. Outside of Nowinski, that’s quite the first four. Spears abound as Rey gets back into it and Nowinski is sent outside but not eliminated.

Jericho is sent into the post and through the ropes to the floor. Rey and Edge shake hands and go at it with Rey hitting the 619 but he gets powerbombed to put both guys down. It’s Christian in at #6 with an offer to reform the team with Edge. That earns him a spear but here’s Nowinski to throw Edge and Mysterio to the apron. Chavo Guerrero is in at #7 as the Smackdown is strong with this Rumble.

Rey and Chavo do a quick lucha sequence with the 619 setting up a springboard seated senton. Christian eats a 619 of his own, followed by a hurricanrana to get rid of Nowinski. Jericho comes back in for a hard clothesline to get rid of Mysterio and here’s Tajiri in at #8. Things settle down a bit with Chavo choking Jericho in the corner and Tajiri not being able to eliminate Christian.

Bill DeMott is in at #9 and attacks various people in short order. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled here as we’re waiting on the big name to clean out some of these names. Tommy Dreamer is in at #10 to give us Dreamer, Jericho, Edge, Christian, Chavo, Tajiri and DeMott. Dreamer brings weapons with him and Edge knocks DeMott out with a kendo stick. Jericho and Christian hit a con-trashcanlid-o on Dreamer and get rid of him without much effort. Tajiri takes them both down with a handspring elbow but the Tarantula is easily broken up, allowing Jericho to get rid of him.

B2, still with the Cena entrance theme, is in at #11…and Edge gets rid of him in less than thirty seconds. Chavo is speared out next, followed by a bloody Jericho (from a Dreamer kendo stick shot) dumping Edge and Christian to leave himself all alone. Rob Van Dam is in at #12 because Edge/Van Dam vs. Christian/Jericho was out of the question for some reason. A superkick has Jericho in trouble and he’s catapulted all the way to the apron. Matt Hardy, who strongly dislikes mustard, is in at #13 and drops Rob with a Side Effect.

Van Dam gets double teamed for a bit until he flips over Jericho and kicks Matt in the face for good measure. The Five Star hits Jericho and it’s Eddie Guerrero in at #14. We get a rehash of Eddie vs. Van Dam from last year until Matt helps Eddie set up an ugly frog splash. That earns Eddie a Twist of Fate (Eddie is smarter than that) and it’s Jeff Hardy in at #15.

Jeff doesn’t buy the reunion idea either (like anyone would buy a Hardys reunion in 2003 or beyond) and beats Matt up, only to have Shannon Moore dive onto Matt to save him from a Swanton. That’s fine with Jeff so he crushes both of them as Rosey is in at #16. Matt gets backdropped to the apron as the eliminations have slowed WAY down. Test is in at #17 and gets to clean house a bit without eliminating anyone. You know, because Rosey needs to stick around.

A rapping John Cena is in at #18 giving reasons why he’s going to win this. The camera stays on him and for once it’s not the biggest problem as nothing is going on in the ring. Van Dam beats him up on the floor (maybe for wrestling in jeans instead of jean shorts for a change) and it’s Charlie Haas in at #19. Where are Lesnar and Undertaker to clear these people out? Jeff tries to run up the corner so Rob eliminates him, still leaving us with far too many people.

Rikishi is in at #20, giving us Rikishi, Jericho, Rob Van Dam, Matt Hardy, Eddie Guerrero, Rosey, Test, Cena and Haas. Rosey and Rikishi have a weird family reunion as Shannon comes in to protect Matt. That just earns him a double Stinkface, or at least it would have if Rosey hadn’t clotheslined Rikishi instead. Jamal is in at #21 to superkick Rikishi, who pops right back up with a Stinkface for his…..brother I believe.

Kane is in at #22 to clean house but he brings Rico in with a chokeslam to fill the ring up even more. Rosey is tossed in a hurry and it’s a double chokeslam for Matt and Shannon. Shelton Benjamin is in at #23 as the ring is WAY too full with eleven people in there, plus Shannon and Rico at various times. They all fight near the ropes and it’s Booker T. in at #24. We go to a weird closeup for an ax kick on Kane and there’s the Spinarooni. Eddie gets backdropped out and it’s A-Train in at #25.

A good looking A-Train Bomb (chokebomb) plants Cena and another one hits Van Dam but Rikishi superkicks A-Train in the face. Jericho is sent to the apron AGAIN but here’s a bandaged Shawn to go after Jericho, allowing Test to knock him out. Shawn stays on Jericho and that’s a Wrestlemania match. Maven is in at #26 (because this match needed two Tough Enough names) and goes after Kane as things slow down again. Goldust is in at #27 and doesn’t even last a minute before Team Angle puts him out. They do the same to Booker T. a few seconds later, making sure that the Booker T./Goldust team is swiftly beaten again.

Batista is in at #28 and gets rid of Test (after EIGHTEEN MINUTES, or longer than Edge and Mysterio combined) and Rikishi. Brock Lesnar is in at #29 and becomes the most obvious winner since….well last year with HHH actually. He wastes no time in getting rid of Team Angle before throwing Matt onto both of them. Now that’s how you clear out some bodies. Undertaker is in at #30 to give us a final group of Undertaker, Van Dam, Cena, Jamal, Kane, A-Train, Maven, Batista and Lesnar. Not the worst field actually.

Undertaker dumps Cena (Which could have set up a heck of a Wrestlemania match today but we wanted a reality show moment instead. Yes you did want that and Kevin Dunn told me so.) and Jamal (Why was he still there?) before Maven hits the same dropkick as last year. This time there’s no effect though, making Maven’s celebration a bit amusing.

After Maven is launched out, A-Train hits the A-Train Bomb on Undertaker. Van Dam and Kane get rid of A-Train and we’re down to five. Kane loads up Rob in a gorilla press….and throws him out in a smart move (not a heel turn). Batista and Kane are put down with a double clothesline and it’s time for Lesnar vs. Undertaker.

That’s broken up before anything can happen though and the Brothers of Destruction start taking over. Brock takes care of Batista and Kane so we can have the Undertaker showdown. The F5 is countered and Brock takes a Tombstone, followed by Undertaker dumping Batista and Kane. Batista comes back in and eats a chair shot, leaving Brock to eliminate Undertaker for the win.

Rating: B. There was a REALLY bad dead spot in the middle and some of the choices were all over the place (Test, Jamal and Rikishi all getting over fourteen minutes while Los Guerreros, Edge and Mysterio were all afterthoughts) but the ending was the right call. The final four wasn’t a bad group at all and having Lesnar dump Undertaker to win is as good a move as they could have made.

There was VERY little build to this match and they did well enough with it while they could. It’s not a terrible Rumble but there are many better options. Fix the middle part and get rid of people at a faster clip and it’s a great one, but as it is it’s just pretty good. Then again, for this year that’s quite the compliment.

The big problem here though is how weak the midcard and lower card is. Maybe it’s just the way some of them were booked but aside from Lesnar, Undertaker and MAYBE Jericho, was anyone a real threat to win here? Having an obvious winner is fine but it would be nice to build up someone else as a possible winner.

Overall Rating: B-. The World Title matches cancel each other out and thankfully the Rumble is there to make up for a nothing lower card. Lesnar winning was the obvious ending here and that left the rest of the show to really carry things. Angle vs. Benoit is must see and Steiner vs. HHH may be as well if you’re into unintentional comedy. The rest of the show though…..egads there’s nothing to see there. It’s a perfectly good show but the problems are very big and the Rumble isn’t good enough to make it a classic.

Ratings Comparison

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D
2013 Redo: C+
2017 Redo: D+

Dudley Boyz vs. William Regal/Lance Storm

Original: C
2013 Redo: D
2017 Redo: C-

Dawn Marie vs. Torrie Wilson

Original: DD
2013 Redo: D-
2017 Redo: F

Scott Steiner vs. HHH

Original: G-
2013 Redo: H (For HHH)
2017 Redo: N (For Not HHH’s Fault)

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2017 Redo: A+

Royal Rumble

Original: B
2013 Redo: B-
2017 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C-
2017 Redo: B-

This is a rare instance where the original is much closer to the new ratings than the first redo. Maybe I was in a bad mood that day?

You can read the original review here:

And the 2013 redo here:

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Smackdown – August 3, 2007: I Guess That’s Wrestling

Smackdown
Date: August 3, 2007
Location: US Airways Center, Phoenix, Arizona
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are on the way to Summerslam and now we have a main event set for the show. Batista will be challenging the Great Khali for the World Heavyweight Title, which you probably could have seen coming. Other than that, we’re getting some kind of competition between Matt Hardy and MVP, which will NOT be wrestling, because that would be too appropriate. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Batista interrupting Great Khali’s celebration last week (kind of a jerk move really) and setting up the Summerslam title match.

Opening sequence.

Here are Teddy Long and Kristal for a chat. Kristal says Teddylicious (JBL is gone off that one) has an announcement: the wedding will take place on September 21 and everyone here is invited! All you would have to do is come to Atlanta! Cue the Great Khali with Runjin Singh to interrupt though and Long is a bit nervous. Khali speaks to Long and screams at Kristal, who runs off. Singh translates, as Khali wants Batista for what happened last week, but Long doesn’t like how Khali spoke to the two of them. The title match is on for Summerslam though.

Kane vs. Chris Masters

Masters grabs a headlock to start but gets shoved away without much trouble. Kane chokes away in the corner and cranks on the arm to take Masters down. Masters manages to snap him throat first across the top rope and the neck crank goes on. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex though and Kane adds a regular one for a bonus. Kane hammers away in the corner and hits the running clothesline into the side slam. Masters tries the Masterlock again but gets reversed into a chokeslam for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Basic power match here with Masters not being able to hook his one big move and getting chokeslammed instead. This was a fine way to keep Kane looking strong before he goes into whatever he’s doing at Summerslam. Masters…well he’s still employed and that’s impressive at this point.

Deuce N Domino are ready to take out Batista and Ric Flair. Deuce didn’t like Batista looking at Cherry….who is missing.

Chuck Palumbo still likes motorcycles.

Mark Henry vs. Nate Nickerson

Splash and bearhug finish for Henry in about a minute.

Henry says no one of consequence will take his challenge because of this, which sends us to a video on his dominance.

Jesse and Festus want to make sure they are well dressed, but only Jesse comes close.

We recap Matt Hardy vs. MVP, the latter of whom says he can beat Matt in anything.

It’s time for arm wrestling, with MVP taking his time like any heel in an arm wrestling contest. We go long form with the stalling so Matt finally grabs the hand and makes him start. Matt wins, sending MVP into a rant about how he can beat Matt in anything.

Matt Hardy vs. MVP

Non-title and joined in progress with Matt working on the arm. Matt sends the arm into the buckle and cranks away a bit before taking it down into an armbar. A Stunner on the arm gets two but MVP snaps Matt’s throat across the top. Now it’s MVP getting to crank on both arms at once but Matt throws him down and fires off right hands.

MVP is right back with the big boot, which sends Matt out to the floor to cut off the cover. The front facelock goes on back inside, because kicking Matt in the head again isn’t an option for some reason. Matt powers up and grabs a suplex to escape, followed by the clotheslines. A bulldog gives Matt two and a Side Effect is good for the same. The threat of the Twist of Fate sends MVP outside again and this time he takes the countout.

Rating: B-. These two worked well together and now the feud gets to continue. The good thing is they didn’t do something stupid here like have a surprise fall, as MVP bailing to talk more trash later is the right way to go. Hardy is actually on a heck of a roll at the moment and hopefully that leads somewhere good.

Domino is looking for Cherry and finds her coming out of Batista’s locker room. They leave with Deuce, but Ric Flair was inside. Batista pops up for some smiling as I have a lot of questions.

Jamie Noble runs into a laughing Funaki and Shannon Moore, who mock him for being short and losing to Hornswoggle. Noble gets frustrated as Hornswoggle pops out of a garbage can.

Rey Mysterio is back at Summerslam.

Chavo Guerrero comes in to see Vickie Guerrero and Kristal. The latter leaves so Chavo talks about putting Rey Mysterio out of action. Vickie gives him Rey at Summerslam.

Jamie Noble vs. Shannon Moore

Noble forearms him in the back of the head to start and some headbutts keep Moore in trouble. Moore fights up and hits Jeff Hardy’s Whisper in the Wind for two, only to walk into a gutbuster for the pin.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here, but it was a way to get Noble on the show, likely for what will be a goofy post match bit with Hornswoggle. That’s hardly the most thrilling deal, but at least they’re doing something with the title. Now granted they haven’t had a chance to turn it into a full on joke yet, but give them some time.

Post match here’s Hornswoggle for the chase, capped off with Noble getting hit with a pie (which he just happened to have laying around). Then Hornswoggle steps on him and runs away.

Kenny Dykstra vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Victoria and cowgirl Torrie Wilson are here. Yang grabs a headlock to start and hits a hard clothesline to the floor. The ensuing dive takes Dykstra out again but he’s right back with a neckbreaker for two. The chinlock goes on, followed by a suplex and another chinlock. Dykstra ties him in the Tree of Woe, where Victoria gets in a few shots of her own.

Yang doesn’t seem to mind and comes back with a dropkick, followed by the running spinwheel kick in the corner. The high crossbody is knocked out of the air though, meaning Dykstra can go up as well. This time it’s Yang kicking him down, setting up the moonsault press for the pin.

Rating: C. The more I watch these shows, the more amazed I am by how how nothing a lot of these matches seem to be. Yang is just shy of being a comedy character (who can wrestle a nice enough match) and he’s having a match with another low level guy like Dykstra. It’s not bad action or anything, but there isn’t much to draw anyone in here.

Ric Flair/Batista vs. Deuce N Domino

Non-title and Cherry is here with Deuce N Domino. Batista punches away at Deuce to start and it’s off to Flair for a hiptoss. It’s back to Batista for an armbar, which doesn’t last very long. Instead Flair comes back in and is backdropped down to give Deuce N Domino a breather. Domino hits a jumping back elbow to the jaw for two and we take a break.

Back with Batista getting to clean house and handing it off to Flair for the Figure Four. Domino makes the fast save though and it’s an armbar to keep Flair down. Deuce punches away to set up the Flair Flop and the armbar goes on again. Flair is bleeding from the eye, meaning Domino can stay on the arm. An elbow to the face gets Flair out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in Batista to clean house. The spear and spinning Boss Man Slam connect…and here is Great Khali. The distraction lets Deuce N Domino jump Batista and that’s a DQ.

Rating: C+. Batista and Flair still work well together and it wouldn’t have been a terrible upset, but the champs can’t beat Flair in a tag match? With distraction included? I know their reign is all but dead but egads man. Pretty good for a low level main event though, and Khali vs. Batista is built up some more. The match is going to be ugly, but they’re doing something to set it up.

Post match Khali puts Flair in a claw hold and knocks him out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Certainly not a bad show overall, but another show you didn’t need to see. That happens too frequently around Smackdown and it is never a good thing to see. They did add a few more matches to Summerslam, but another Rey vs. Chavo match is hardly the big drawing card for the show. Matt vs. MVP is good for a secondary feud though and if they can find a good angle, the title change should work out well. Overall pretty good, but they fall off after a certain point when it comes to feeling important.

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – July 27, 2007: Celebrate With Half The Opponents

Smackdown
Date: July 27, 2007
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with the Great American Bash and we’re still living in the Great Khali’s world. Khali survived against Kane and Batista in a triple threat match and now we need a new challenger. By that it probably means one of the two, and since Kane got pinned, Batista would seem to be a likely option. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Great American Bash if you need a recap.

We open with a triple threat recap as Khali retains the title.

Opening sequence.

Batista vs. Deuce

Domino and Cherry are here with Deuce. Batista powers him down with as much effort as you would expect him to need and then does it again. Domino offers a distraction though and Batista gets kicked out to the floor. Back in and Deuce scores with a kick to the head before avoiding a charge to send Batista into the post. The armbar goes on for a bit but Deuce spends too much time trash talking, allowing Batista to hit a spear. Some clotheslines set up the shoulders in the corner and there’s the spinebuster. The Batista Bomb finishes Deuce off.

Rating: C. This was a heck of a lot more competitive than I would have bet on and that’s not the worst thing. Batista should have to break a sweat to beat a champion, even if it is Deuce. It might not have been a great match, but it makes sense to get Batista out there in front of the fans.

We look at Hornswoggle winning the Cruiserweight Title.

Jamie Noble is sick of people laughing at him for losing to Hornswoggle so tonight it is time for him to get the title back.

Michelle McCool likes to swim.

Cruiserweight Title: Hornswoggle vs. Jamie Noble

Noble is challenging but there is no Hornswoggle to start. With no champ, Noble checks underneath the ring but Hornswoggle pops up in the ring because of course he does. Noble gets back in so Hornswoggle can bite/kick his leg for some early annoyance. They head outside and Noble kicks the steps by mistake. Hornswoggle tricks him into missing a charge and it’s a dropkick for two on Noble. Back up and Hornswoggle gets tossed outside, where the chase is on. Noble manages to rib off Hornswoggle’s shoe…but falls and gets counted out. Somehow, Cole interprets this as a pin.

Rating: D. Somehow, this might make the title feel a bit more important than it has in months. Yes it was comedy and the champ made Noble look like an idiot, but I’ll almost take this over the lifeless matches that we had for such a long time. Hornswoggle is little more than a joke as champion but it’s not like the title has meant anything in a long time anyway.

Video on Rey Mysterio, who is on his way back.

We look at the Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero I Quit match where Chavo destroyed Rey’s knee to put him on the shelf.

Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Eugene

Apparently Eugene and Cole had a nice chat earlier today. Chavo goes after the knee to start and we hit the half crab to make it worse. That’s broken up and the bad knee means Eugene can’t get the airplane spin. Instead, Chavo can belly to back suplex him down and it’s back to the knee. The leg cranking is on and Chavo bends the knee around the rope. Chavo sends him face first into the corner and Eugene’s comeback is on, meaning the airplane spin can work this time. That’s enough for Chavo, who hits a quick brainbuster and the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C-. It was about all you could get out of Chavo vs. Eugene with Chavo working on the knee to show he’s ready for the return of Rey Mysterio. Other than that though, it was little more than a squash with Guerrero never being in any serious danger. Fine enough to build Chavo back up though, assuming you can get invested in a Chavo Guerrero feud.

Ric Flair and Matt Hardy are ready for their tag match.

Jesse and Festus really love America.

MVP/Chris Masters vs. Matt Hardy/Ric Flair

Hardy starts with MVP but it’s off to Masters before anything gets going. Masters fights out of an early headlock and powers Hardy into the corner for a shot to the face. MVP comes in and stomps away in the corner but it’s quickly off to Flair for a bunch of chops. The villains are knocked outside for a breather and we take an early break.

Back with Flair working on MVP’s leg but a rope is grabbed in a hurry. Hardy comes in for a few shots and it’s right back to Flair for more chops. One of them knocks MVP over for the tag to Masters, who unloads in the corner. MVP’s running boot in the corner knocks Flair silly and it’s off to a hammerlock. Masters comes back in for a powerslam and an armbar but Flair fights up in a hurry. A kick to the face allows the hot tag to Hardy so house can be cleaned. The Side Effect gets two with MVP making a fast save. Not that it matters as the Twist of Fate finishes Masters (with MVP not bothering to make another save).

Rating: C+. Hardy gets a win back to start his rebuilding and that is a good idea. Ultimately, Hardy is probably not done with MVP and the title so it makes a lot of sense to put him in in a spot like this. Flair and Masters were just kind of there, but at least they did something to keep the match fresh.

Post match MVP says that doesn’t matter because he’s still the US Champion. Hardy brought everything he had at the Great American Bash and lost, because he can’t beat MVP at anything. Matt tells him to put his money where his mouth is and give him another title shot. MVP says the title is off the table but Matt can’t beat him at anything, from baseball to running to chess or anything else. That’s fine with Matt, who says he’ll pick a bunch of games and beat MVP every single time. Then MVP will have no choice but to give Matt a US Title shot. I think Matt’s logic might be a bit off there.

Chuck Palumbo loves motorcycles.

Mark Henry vs. Joey Blaylock

Henry runs him over without much trouble to start and adds a big boot. A powerslam and splash get two, with Henry picking him up. The bearhug finishes Blaylock in a hurry.

Post match, Henry says no man or beast can beat him and tosses Blaylock outside. That was such a bad beating that Henry beat the Blaylock out of him and turned the guy into Joey Ryan.

Raw Rebound.

Teddy Long and Kristal are talking wedding plans when Ron Simmons comes in. Long asks him to be the best man, which is good for a catchphrase and an emotional hug. The guys are off for some cigars and reminiscing.

Here’s the same video on the Great American Bash triple threat from earlier.

Edge had his torn pectoral muscle fixed and he still blames Kane.

Kane vs. Dave Taylor

Taylor isn’t scared and slugs away to start, earning himself a toss across the ring. Kane unloads in the corner and drops an elbow, only to get uppercutted some more. An armbar actually has Kane in a bit more trouble and Taylor pounds him into the corner again. Kane isn’t having that though and scores with a running clothesline, setting up the sidewalk slam. There’s the top rope clothesline and Kane hits the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C. Who would have thought that Taylor would give Kane a bit of a fight here? Taylor is someone who certainly does put in the effort every time he is out there and it gives you a match that is far better than you would expect. Kane seems primed for a big enough match at Summerslam, though I’m not sure who he could face.

Torrie Wilson has gone cowgirl for her mixed tag with Jimmy Wang Yang against Victoria and Kenny Dykstra. And no, apparently the shorts aren’t too short.

Torrie Wilson/Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Kenny Dykstra/Victoria

Victoria goes after Torrie before the bell but it’s Dykstra clotheslining Yang a few times to start instead. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Yang’s back as commentary talks about how Torrie looks. Yang fights up and hits a spinwheel kick, allowing the double tag to the women. Some clotheslines have Victoria in trouble but she comes right back with the spinning side slam for two. The double arm crank goes on but Torrie is back up with a swinging neckbreaker. Torrie has to crawl away from Dykstra though…and it’s off to Yang a few seconds later anyway. The moonsault press finishes Dykstra without much trouble.

Rating: D. They had a short and bad match as commentary talked about how great Torrie looked throughout. That’s about all you can expect here and I can’t say I’m surprised. It isn’t like there is anything else for them to do and Torrie wearing the outfit was there to be more fun and silly than anything else, which didn’t help the match that much.

It’s time for Great Khali’s World Championship celebration, complete with a bunch of dancers and music setting up his entrance. Khali and Runjin Singh come out, with Khali holding the title upside down again. Singh translates Khali’s yelling, which is bragging about all of his accomplishments. Now he is one of the greatest Indians of all time, like M. Night Shyamalan and Mother Teresa! It is time for Punjabi dancing but, after a good while, Batista interrupts. The challenge for a title match is on and a spear drops Khali to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t a very good show and I’m not sure I can see it getting better anytime in the near future. There was very little worth seeing on here and I don’t know how good things are going to be on the way to Summerslam. Edge being gone hurt things but it wasn’t like it was a great weekly show before his injury. It wasn’t a very good show, but it was more uninteresting than anything else.

 

 

 

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Smackdown – July 20, 2007: And New

Smackdown
Date: July 20, 2007
Location: Entertainment Center, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and the two big matches are set. We’ll be seeing Batista vs. Great Khali plus Edge defending the World Title against Kane. Before we get there though, Edge has some kind of a major announcement, which does not exactly bode well. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Teddy Long is in the ring with a big announcement: Edge is injured and has to vacate the World Title. Cue Edge, who asks for some appropriate lighting. Edge talks about how no one believed he could get here but he came back for the fans and to prove it to himself. Last week, Kane attacked him without provocation, because Kane knew he couldn’t win on his own at the Great American Bash.

Edge tore his pectoral muscle and is going to be out of action for four months. He has even prepared a tribute video for our enjoyment, which says he’s simply the best. Long thinks this is a bit too much drama but Edge can come back, win some matches, and get another title shot.

As for tonight though, we’ll be having a twenty man battle royal to crown a new World Champion. Edge can’t hand the title over because he can’t believe we’re moving on so quickly. Long doesn’t really want to hear it but Edge promises to get the title back. He hands the belt over and walks away, looking like he’s about to cry. That’s a pretty big shakeup but the battle royal to crown a new champion taking place so fast is a nice surprise.

Victoria vs. Torrie Wilson

Victoria powers her into the corner and hammers away to start but Torrie actually takes things to the floor. The brawl is on with Torrie unloading before taking it back inside for a small package. Victoria kicks her in the face and grabs a chinlock before sending Torrie head first into the mat. The swinging neckbreaker gives Torrie two but Victoria is right back with the Widow’s Peak for the pin.

Rating: C-. Torrie was working hard here and looked a lot more comfortable in the ring, but ultimately this match is a good example of what’s wrong with the women’s division without a title. There’s nothing to these matches other than personal issues, and almost all of those tend to be based on how one of the women looks. That’s not going to get you very far and it certainly hasn’t with this, making these matches little more than filler.

Rey Mysterio is coming back.

We look back at Edge vacating the title.

Smackdown World Title: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Chris Masters, Eugene, Great Khali, Batista, Finlay, Deuce, Domino, MVP, Matt Hardy, Brian Major, Brett Major, Jamie Noble, Chavo Guerrero, Funaki, Jimmy Wang Yang, Dave Taylor, Shannon Moore, Kane, Kenny Dykstra

For the vacant title and only a handful get entrances. The bell rings to start said entrances, with Yang thinking the match was starting and kicking Taylor before realizing he jumped the gun. It’s a big brawl to start and Henry tosses one Major at another to get rid of both. Moore and Funaki are out as well and we take a break. Back with Khali and Henry knocking people down (not out) and the staredown is on…until everyone else jumps Henry to get rid of him.

A bunch of people hit other people with Khali shrugging off anyone who gets in a few shots. Batista tosses Deuce, Domino and Taylor but turns around to face off with Kane. Noble goes after both of them and is tossed with ease, followed by Eugene getting the same treatment to get us down to ten. We take another break and come back again with Dykstra being tossed out.

MVP misses his running boot in the corner and gets tossed by Hardy. The Masterlock has Yang in trouble but Chavo makes the save for no logical reason. Yang saves Chavo as well and the two of them get rid of Masters. Chavo goes after Yang and gets eliminated as a result, leaving us with Hardy, Yang, Kane, Batista, Khali and Finlay. Yang is sat on the apron, allowing Hornswoggle to pop up and get rid of him.

Khali kicks Hardy out and we’re down to four. Finlay is knocked outside (not eliminated), leaving Khali to beat on Kane and Batista. Now it’s Finlay coming back in with the shillelagh but Kane grabs him by the throat. Batista breaks that up with a spear and gets rid of Finlay, leaving us with three. Batista goes after Kane on the ropes but Khali tosses both of them for the win and the title.

Rating: C. It’s a very long battle royal but something with stakes like this should be getting the extra time. Khali winning the title is a good way to go as he is the ultimate monster to slay. You can pick someone to do that and get a good story out of it (ok it’s going to be Batista) so this is about as logical of a choice as they had given the circumstances.

Post match Khali is presented with the title, which he holds upside down.

Post break, Khali and Runjin Singh talks about the celebrations going on around the world. The days of Indians being labeled as quicky mart owners and cab drivers and doctors is over. Khali is everyone’s champion.

Vickie Guerrero and Teddy Long realize Great Khali needs a challenger at the Great American Bash. The solution: Kane vs. Batista in a #1 contenders match later tonight.

Raw Rebound.

Matt Hardy vs. Kenny Dykstra

Both of them are banged up from the battle royal. Hardy rolls him up for an early two as we see MVP watching. A headlock takeover keeps Dykstra in trouble and a sunset flip gives Hardy two as commentary goes at it over MVP’s bragging. Dykstra manages to snap the throat across the top rope, setting up a slingshot elbow back inside.

Back to back clotheslines get two but Hardy fights out of a sleeper in a hurry. Dykstra is right back up with a chinlock so Hardy has to escape again, this time scoring with a clothesline. The middle rope elbow to the back of the neck sets up the Twist of Fate to give Hardy the pin.

Rating: C. This wasn’t quite up to the levels that Hardy has been hitting as of late, but he’s going into his US Title match on a roll and that’s a great thing. It never ceases to amaze me how WWE knows how to do something like this but continues to screw it up so often. Hardy has won a lot of matches and is ready for a title match. Why is that so hard to do?

Chuck Palumbo really likes motorcycles.

Jesse and Festus want to be on magazine covers.

MVP goes on a rant about being better than anyone and everyone around here, including Matt Hardy.

Great American Bash rundown.

Kane vs. Batista

The winner gets the shot at Great Khali on Sunday. They start slowly until Batista shoulders him down for an early two. Kane takes him into the corner for the uppercut and a slam evens the near fall score. The chinlock doesn’t do much on Batista, who powers out without too much trouble. Batista’s bodyscissors is broken in a hurry as well so Kane hits a hard clothesline. A big boot puts Batista outside and we take a break.

Back with Kane hammering away in the corner and having to escape the Batista Bomb attempt. Kane’s top rope clothesline misses though and Batista is back with the spinebuster. The spear is cut off and it’s a chokeslam for two on Batista. They head outside again, with Batista sending him into the steps. Back in and Batista hits a top rope shoulder….and here is Khali to jump Batista, which will be called a double DQ/no contest, because rules don’t mean much in comparison to the power of the WWE script.

Rating: C+. Not a bad power match, but you could probably guess how the ending was going to go. They have three people for two matches so the triple threat is the only thing they can do, outside of moving someone else into the main event scene. It was starting to pick up near the end, but they needed to get to the ending so I can’t get that annoyed.

Teddy Long comes out to make the triple threat title match to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They did what they could here as the Edge injury turned everything upside down. All things considered, this could have been far worse and it was nice to see them getting it as right as they did. The wrestling was the usual middle of the road stuff, but it was certainly historic with the new champion. Not a great show, but it put out some fires in efficient enough fashion.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 13, 2007: Extra Good Wrestling

Smackdown
Date: July 13, 2007
Location: New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 2,271
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

The Great American Bash is in less than two weeks and we have a somewhat intriguing main event of Kane vs. Edge for the World Title. At the same time though, we also have Batista vs. Great Khali, which might not be the best idea in the world. They have some time to set things up though so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Edge is on the phone and seems paranoid that Kane is behind him. This could be due to Kane popping up in a window over Edge’s shoulder.

Opening sequence.

Matt Hardy vs. Chris Masters

MVP is on commentary. They take their time to start, with Hardy grabbing a headlock. A hard shoulder drops Matt and an elbow to the face does it again. Masters drives him into the corner as MVP talks about how he is absolutely the greatest US Champion of all time. The Masterlock is teased and we take a break.

Back with Matt missing the middle rope legdrop as MVP says he isn’t scared of Hardy at the Bash. Hardy gets in some right hands but Masters sends him back into the corner to cut that off in a hurry. Masters bends Hardy’s back over the knee, setting up a hard clothesline out of the corner for two. The neck crank goes on as MVP talks about everything he has accomplished in WWE so far. Matt fights back up and hits the middle rope elbow to the back of the neck, plus the Side Effect for two. Masters gets up and walks right into the Twist of Fate for the pin.

Rating: C. This was another longer form Matt match and now they are using the winning streak to set him up for a title match. That’s how this thing can work very well and it’s making me want to see what happens when he faces MVP. Good enough stuff here, which is all the more impressive with someone as simple as Masters.

Post match Matt and MVP have a staredown but Masters grabs the Masterlock on Hardy. With Matt done, MVP hits the Playmaker for good measure.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Finlay

Finlay powers him around to start but has to avoid a spinning kick to the face. With that not working for Yang, Finlay grabs a front facelock. Yang fights up and manages to dropkick Finlay outside, which has JBL stunned. Finlay pulls Yang down into the ring skirt to administer the beating though, which has JBL back to normal.

Back in and Finlay starts cranking on the arm before blasting Yang with a clothesline. The Fujiwara armbar goes on to keep Yang in trouble but Yang manages some shots to the face. Back up and Yang hits the running spinwheel kick in the corner, followed by a high crossbody for two. Finlay backdrops him so hard that Yang lands on his face, setting up the Celtic Cross for the pin.

Rating: C+. I liked this one a good bit better than I would have expected and that’s a nice surprise. Finlay beat him up but Yang scored a few shots here and there to make it interesting. It’s always nice to see a random pairing like this work out and they had a rather fun TV match.

Post match Hornswoggle is let out from underneath the ring, gets in a bite on Yang, and then hides again.

Chavo Guerrero/Jamie Noble vs. Major Brothers

Noble and Brian start things off with Noble elbowing his way out of a hammerlock. An armdrag into an armbar works a bit better and it’s off to Brett for an armbar of his own. Noble kicks him into the corner though and it’s off to Chavo for a chinlock. Noble grabs a camel clutch and even holds Brett away from a hot tag attempt, allowing Chavo to come back in.

That doesn’t last long either as Brett gets up and knocks Chavo away, setting up the hot tag to Brian. Everything breaks down and Noble is suplexed to the floor, leaving Chavo to get caught with a missile dropkick for the fast pin (because you have to pin the Cruiserweight Champion here).

Rating: C+. Champ getting pinned aside, this was another solid, back and forth match between talented wrestlers. You can always use something like that on any show and it is great to see the Major Brothers already getting some success. They feel like an old school team with the name and matching gear. Go with more like that, especially if they work well like this.

Vickie Guerrero runs into Runjin Singh, who has some issues with Great Khali’s contract signing with Batista tonight. He puts his arm around her shoulders but Vickie doesn’t care, so the contract signing/match are still on. Khali shows up to yell at Vickie and then beats up a backstage worker.

Rey Mysterio is coming back.

Kane invades the inside of Edge’s TV, making me think of the time Lucy got inside the Ricardos’ TV on I Love Lucy.

Here is Teddy Long to run the contract signing between Batista and Great Khali. Batista wastes no time in signing the contract, but Runjin Singh warns him that he will see a real animal at the Great American Bash. Khali isn’t scared and shouts a lot before signing. Batista offers a handshake but then slaps Khali in the face, which is enough to send Khali outside. The steps are thrown in but Batista throws them right back, along with everything else.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Luke Hawx

Palumbo grabs a headlock takeover to start and shrugs off a spinwheel kick for a bonus. Hawx gets up a boot in the corner but Palumbo tosses him down with a suplex. A running big boot and Full Throttle give Palumbo the pin. It’s amazing what happens when you have someone with a good look and don’t give them a comedy gimmick.

Jesse and Festus like the Divas because Festus is a ladies man.

Kane scared Edge while he’s brushing his teeth.

Deuce N Domino don’t like Eugene looking at their car but they agree to drive him to the ring if he’ll take Deuce’s match.

Eugene vs. Mark Henry

Henry glares at Deuce N Domino and Cherry before running over Eugene in the corner. Forearms to the back and shots to the knees set up the World’s Strongest Slam. Henry grabs the bearhug for the easy win.

Michelle McCool rollerblades.

We look back at Torrie Wilson and Victoria brawling last week.

Teddy Long and Kristal are happy with the wedding plans. Vickie Guerrero comes in and is offered the position as maid of honor. Planning mode activates.

Torrie Wilson vs. Victoria

Victoria takes her into the corner to start and gets in a hard slap to the face. Torrie’s hair pulling doesn’t work so Victoria hits a knee to the ribs. She yells about Torrie not being so pretty and kicks her down for two more. There’s the choking on the ropes but Torrie fights up with forearms. A swinging neckbreaker gives Torrie two and they fight outside, with Torrie hitting a Thesz press off the apron. The beating continues and Torrie wins via countout.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting here? This is the same kind of match that we have seen for years and it’s one of the most common stories you would see involving Torrie. I’ve lost count of the amount of wrestlers to insult her looks but it’s not like she has much of a character to talk about otherwise.

Edge has a Mardi Gras party of characters ready for a celebration.

Here is the full on Mardi Gras float, complete with Edge right in the middle. Edge goes a bit nuts with the celebrating before saying that this is his kind of town. The celebration you’re about to see will pale in comparison to what you see at the Great American Bash after he retains the title. The celebration is on again until one of the people in costumes stares at him. Edge spears him, but one of the other people takes their mask off to reveal Kane. The beatdown is on in a hurry until some of the other try to help Edge. Kane beats them up instead and stares Edge down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling here was better than expected for the most part and that takes away from some of the goofy stuff involving Kane and Edge. You kind of have to expect that kind of thing in a Kane story and it could have been a lot worse. Other than that, it was a show that didn’t have much going on but offered enough good wrestling to make it entertaining. That isn’t something you get to see very often in WWE so itwas nice for a change.

 

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Smackdown – June 22, 2007: Hometown Happiness

Smackdown
Date: June 22, 2007
Location: Bobcats Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Vengeance: Night Of Champions and the card is set. It isn’t a show that needs a lot of setup, so it’s a good thing that we have one of the biggest storylines in years to help pad things out. Other than that, we likely have Batista/Ric Flair vs. MVP/Edge. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open fast with the Cutting Edge, with Edge saying he had Vince McMahon’s final interview on this very show. There will be a special tribute to Vince on Raw, even if Vince made him face Batista in a Last Chance match at Vengeance. For now though, let’s bring out someone brand new to the show, and someone you wouldn’t expect as a suspect: Torrie Wilson.

Torrie isn’t sure what Edge is talking about, but Edge accuses her of being scored by Vince and put into a match with Carlito. Edge sees one liar in the ring but here is MVP to cut them off. MVP doesn’t think Torrie should have to go through this…because she should be going through a lie detector test! Cue Ric Flair to go after both of them but the beatdown is on. Batista runs in for the save, setting up a likely tag team main event.

Post break, Teddy Long and Vickie Guerrero have made the tag match.

Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore vs. Chavo Guerrero/Jamie Noble

Not this tag match. Noble headscissors Moore down to start and grabs a rather early chinlock. That’s broken up so Noble hits a running shoulder before it’s off to Chavo. A dropkick gives Moore two and it’s off to Yang, who gets a bit of a response (which may be canned but it’s better than nothing). Noble comes back in and gets caught in a jumping hurricanrana, only to stomp Yang down without much trouble.

Chavo comes in and stomps away before it’s right back to Noble to work on the arm. Yang fights up but Chavo avoids a charge to send Yang’s shoulder into the post. That doesn’t stop Yang from hitting a dropkick though and the hot tag brings in Moore. House is cleaned in a hurry and Chavo is dropped face first onto the buckle. Yang hits a big dive onto Noble but Chavo Gory Bombs Moore for the pin.

Rating: C. It’s the least valuable title this side of the Texas Hardcore Title but there is something about putting four high fliers out there and letting them go for a few minutes. Chavo needed the win to get him back on track before the title match so at least there is a bit more set up for Sunday. Now just do something with the title already.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show.

Mark Henry vs. Funaki

Henry throws him around a few times to start as commentary raves over the power. The bearhug goes on and Funaki is out in a hurry.

We see more of the same clips of Vince’s explosion and people talking about it that we’ve seen for a week and a half now.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Teddy Long because she has set up all of the travel for everyone to go to Raw next week. Long is happy but seems to have some special plans for himself and Kristal. Cue Kristal, and Long seems nervous about something he has planned in public tonight, with Kristal joining him in the ring.

Finlay vs. Matt Hardy

They take turns powering the other into the corner to start until Finlay hits him in the face. Matt sweeps the leg and grabs a headlock on the mat so Finlay rips at his face. A belly to back suplex has some more success at getting Finlay out of trouble and we hit the chinlock. That’s eventually broken up and Matt sends him face first into the corner over and over.

They head outside where Finlay is sent into the barricade, which draws out Hornswoggle from under the ring. The distraction lets Finlay run Matt over and we take a break. Back with Finlay pulling him down by the hair and going back to the chinlock. With that broken up, Finlay’s Vader Bomb hits raised boot but Finlay goes after the knee. Some kicks to the knee set up a leglock, followed by a kneeling half crab.

Hardy makes the rope so Finlay takes him outside and drops him knee first onto the steps. Back in and Finlay rips the knee brace off and sits on the leg again. Finlay grabs the leg but gets caught with an enziguri to start the comeback. The Side Effect gives Matt two and he manages the middle rope elbow to the back. Hornswoggle offers a distraction but Matt shrugs off the Shillelagh shot and hits the Twist of Fate for the pin.

Rating: B-. This got some serious time and it’s a good sign to see Matt pick up this kind of a win. Matt fought through an injury and interference to win clean. That’s the kind of a win that can help build someone up and it came over someone with enough credibility. It helps to have people like this who can eat up a lot of time and have a rather effective match and they did so here.

We look at Stephanie McMahon’s appearance on Raw, where she remembered her dad and swore vengeance for whoever blew him up.

Here are Teddy Long and Kristal for a chat in the ring. Long says he didn’t know what it meant to be happy before he met her. He has a question for her and proposes, but she starts crying and walks away without saying anything.

Chris Masters vs. Danny Shanley

We get a Masterlock highlight reel before the match, which is pretty much all of Masters’ career. Shanley can’t Irish whip him to start so Masters hits a hard clothesline. Masters snaps him throat first across the top and starts pulling on Shanley’s head. A slam plants Shanley again and we hit the neck crank. Masters switches up to the Masterlock for the easy win.

Rating: D. Yeah it was a squash and yeah it played to Masters’ strengths, but it was the same Masters that we have seen since he debuted. That’s why his career stalled: he looked great and had a good full nelson, but what else did he have? There was little more than a physique and eventually you need something more than that to have a successful career.

In Memory of Sherri Martel. How nice of them to get to this almost three fourths of the way through the show.

Teddy Long finds Kristal in the back and she’s still in tears. He apologizes and she puts the ring on to accept. Well that was anti-climatic.

We run down the Vengeance card.

We get a press conference from the lead investigator in the Vince McMahon case. They have found DNA from Vince, the limo driver and one more well known (and unnamed) personality. This apparently warranted a full press conference (minus press).

Michelle McCool…plays tennis? She gets to take her aggression out on tennis balls and wear these cute outfits (her words). Not their most subtle work here.

Ric Flair/Batista vs. MVP/Edge

Flair gets the big hometown entrance, which is rather well received, and Little Naitch gets to hold the ropes for him. Edge’s pyro leaves the arena a bit smoky to start so Flair chops him in the corner for lowering the air quality. JBL says you don’t want to wrestle someone in their hometown, showing that JBL has no idea how WWE works. Flair cranks on the arm so it’s off to Batista, who gets to run over MVP.

With MVP down, Flair comes in to drop the elbow for two and it’s right back to Batista. MVP kicks Batista in the face and gets plowed over for his efforts as we take a break. Back with Edge stomping on Batista and grabbing a waistlock. MVP’s crossface forearms get two but Batista catches him in the swinging Boss Man Slam. The tag brings in Flair (POP) and house is cleaned, only to have Edge come in with a quick spear to cut him down. Batista makes the save and it’s Flair getting stomped this time.

MVP grabs a seated abdominal stretch but Flair fights up and hits a chop. JBL: “That’s like getting hit with a frying pan.” How many times has he been hit with a frying pan? MVP kicks Flair in the head to cut him off and Edge comes back in to talk a lot of trash. A backdrop gets two as Batista is pacing on the apron. MVP misses a big running boot in the corner though and Flair goes for the leg, allowing the hot tag to Batista. Everything breaks down and Batista counters Edge’s spear into a spinebuster. The Batista Bomb finishes Edge off.

Rating: B. This was good and egads it was nice to not see the hometown star get crushed to end a show. Flair didn’t need to get the fall here because having him get to celebrate to end the show was more than enough. Batista gets some momentum before the title match and Flair gets to pose. That’s how this should have gone and it was a good match too.

Overall Rating: B. Rather strong show here, with the only thing close to bad being a Chris Masters squash. Other than that, it was a pair of good, long matches and a way to make me want to see both Vengeance and Monday’s big show. I liked this one a lot and it’s one of the better TV shows WWE has had in a long time. Nice job.

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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