Monday Night Raw – February 14, 2005: The Last Stop

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 14, 2005
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Attendance: 7,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re back in America but the show is in a bit of a weird place at the moment. It’s the last show before No Way Out, meaning the last show before we can officially begin the Road to Wrestlemania. The fans are chomping at the bit to see Batista finally snap and turn on HHH but we need to go through the motions of acting like Batista might go after JBL instead. The inching forward continues tonight so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Chris Jericho in a mock New York Rangers jersey to open things up with the Highlight Reel. The guest this week is Candice Michelle, who is very popular at the moment due to her Go Daddy commercial from the Super Bowl. Jericho talks about all the attention she has been getting since the commercial but Candice doesn’t know what the big deal is about. She teases dancing a bit here and suggests a wardrobe malfunction might happen.

Jericho freaks out over the idea of a bare shoulders. Candice takes her shoulder straps down, giving us a GREAT CAESAR’S GHOST from Jericho. Cue Muhammad Hassan though and Jericho doesn’t seem pleased. The fans give him a USA chant and Hassan calls it hypocrisy. Not the fans chanting USA to an Arab American and proving his point, but Candice being cheered while he received no accolades for beating Sgt. Slaughter. This is part of the dumbing down of America and Jericho is the poster child of stupidity (I’m having Dean Douglas flashbacks).

Jericho thinks they have a lot in common. See, Hassan and Daivari are Arab Americans and he is the Ayatollah of rock and rollah. Daivari rants and points but Jericho doesn’t play on that side of the fence. Jericho has seen the way they look at each other and gets the idea: Daivari is Hassan’s special Valentine! The match is on after the break.

Chris Jericho vs. Muhammad Hassan

Joined in progress with Hassan getting dropped with a belly to back suplex followed by a regular one for the arrogant two. The Walls attempt doesn’t work so Jericho hits a springboard shoulder to knock him off the apron. A Daivari distraction lets Hassan get in a backbreaker though and it’s time to start in on the ribs. It’s kind of amazing how much easier Hassan is to watch when he’s in a match that might mean something.

The shots to the back are cut off with a spinwheel kick and Jericho hits the running crotch attack to the back. The Flashback looks to finish Hassan but Daivari has the referee. That earns him a springboard dropkick, but the distraction lets Hassan hit the Downward Spiral for the pin.

Rating: D+. I said it was easier to watch but that doesn’t make it good. Hassan’s matches just don’t have many good qualities to them and when the promos are the exact same thing every week, he’s just not going to get very far. I know WWE thinks this is the best idea they’ve had in a good while because it ties into the real world news of the moment, but it’s really not working because they’re not letting it go beyond the stereotypical characteristics.

HHH is ready for a fight because JBL is on his way here to confront Batista. Ric Flair goes to tell Batista and HHH is upset because this is an insult to Evolution.

Announced for the Hall of Fame: Roddy Piper. He has to be there.

Randy Orton talks to Stacy Keibler and she calls him trouble. Stacy asks him if he’d like to do something after the show and Orton is down. These two have less chemistry than an English class.

Flair interrupts Batista flirting with Maria and doesn’t care about JBL showing up. That’s cool with Flair, who says if JBL becomes too big of a problem, Batista can just beat him at Wrestlemania. Batista hasn’t made his mind up yet but he will next week. As for tonight though, Batista wants HHH to stay out of it with JBL. He’s smart, looking intimidating and has a backbone. More reasons why he got over as much as he did.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Gene Snitsky

Benjamin is defending and kicks away to start, setting up the Stinger Splash in the corner. Snitsky kicks him down though and we hit the chinlock, which doesn’t last very long. A middle rope elbow misses Shelton and JR goes into a rant about Piper having the character to go into the Hall of Fame.

Shelton hits a great looking top rope clothesline for two as a fan holds up a Jay Mariotti Fears Woody Paige sign (ESPN fans might get that one). Snitsky’s pumphandle powerslam is broken up so he kicks Shelton in the face for two instead. That means some yelling at the referee, followed by a nasty chair shot to the head for the DQ.

Rating: D. Well it’s better than watching Shelton vs. Maven all over again. Benjamin is still one of the smoothest performers in wrestling and someone who can make anything he does look great. Snitsky is fine as a monster and just getting him away from Kane is a huge improvement. The rematch won’t be great but at least there’s a story to get us there.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. William Regal/Tajiri

Regal and Tajiri are defending after having won the titles last week. Conway punches Regal to start and it’s quickly off to Grenier for a headlock. Since it’s just a headlock, Tajiri comes in for some kicks (which look good as always) to take over. Conway tries to come back in to draw Regal in as well, allowing a neckbreaker from behind to take Tajiri down. The chinlock doesn’t last long as Tajiri fights up and hits the handspring elbow. Regal comes back in and it’s forearms a go-go, plus the knee trembler to finish Conway and retain the titles in a hurry.

Rating: D+. They really need to get away from La Resistance now as they’ve been beaten so many times that the value is gone. I know that means they need to build up some new challengers and that isn’t their strong suit, but they need to do something fresh. Regal and Tajiri don’t feel like long term champions and Tajiri is just Eugene’s replacement, but there is no one who is taking the titles at the moment.

Randy Orton vs. Christian

They’re not wasting as much time with backstage stuff this week. Tyson Tomko is out with Christian, who shoves Orton to start and gets punched in the face. That means more right hands on the mat as Orton is keeping it simple here. A headlock keeps Christian in place and Orton does it again as they seem to have some time for this one. Christian gets back up and chokes in the corner but takes too much time slapping his chest, allowing Orton to punch some more.

Tomko’s distraction doesn’t work as Christian charges into another right hand but Christian finally gets a backdrop to the floor. That lets Tomko make up for his general ineptness with a whip into the steps as we take a break. Back with Tomko having been ejected and Christian (sporting a big welt on the side of his head) grabbing a chinlock. A dropkick and neckbreaker get two each and it’s the chinlock sequel. The reverse DDT gets two more so Christian steps on his head in frustration.

You don’t do that to someone so Orton whips him chest first into the buckle and they’re both down. Orton’s comeback is on with a dropkick and backdrop, plus a long series of forearms to the chest. The great looking high crossbody gets two but Christian dodges a charge to send him into the post. Christian goes for the buckle so here’s Tomko for a big boot to give him two. Orton’s backbreaker sets up a failed RKO attempt, so Orton leapfrogs over him and hits the RKO for the pin.

Rating: B. These two have always worked well together and Christian is getting something out of these matches. It’s the kind of push where he might not be winning but he’s establishing that he can hang with top stars. That and the still funny promos are going to make him a bigger star and the push is seemingly waiting in the wings.

Eric Bischoff is on the phone with Theodore Long, who he accuses of sending JBL here. That’s fine with Eric because Batista will deal with JBL just fine. Edge comes in to complain about everyone talking about Batista. Last week, Batista cost him the world Title and tonight Edge is going to beat him again. Then JBL can come in and beat Batista up so Batista will sign to face JBL at Wrestlemania. Bischoff thinks that’s unlikely but lets Edge go on. If Edge wins, he should get the World Title shot at Wrestlemania. Bischoff doesn’t say anything, as the logic isn’t strong with this one.

Video on the Japan tour.

Here’s Trish Stratus for a chat. Last week during the Divas fashion show, she realized that the new women are trying to steal her spotlight. It doesn’t matter if you’re Brittney Freaking Spears, no one is doing that to her. Trish wants Christy Hemme out here right now because the Women’s Champion wants to say something. Christy comes out with JR praising her personality. Lawler: “THAT’S WHAT YOU NOTICE ABOUT HER???”

Trish brings up a word that the fans used to chant at her, which starts up all over again because there is strong power of suggestion in wrestling. That word (s***) is Christy’s now because she has agreed to pose in Playboy. Christy is giggling with pride and thinks people will want to see the magazine. That doesn’t make the chant apply to her though. Sleeping with half the locker room like Trish does though. A big slap drops Christy as WWE’s inability to go a few months without a women’s storyline involving sex amazes me.

We look back at the end of last week’s show with Batista costing Edge the World Title match.

Kane vs. Simon Dean

Before the match, Simon nearly cries about how his career is probably about to end. Worry not though, because he will continue to produce the Simon System. If you don’t believe in him, he sentences you to a life of obesity! Kane is tired of listening and starts the stalking so Dean hides behind the referee. A glare at said referee allows Simon to throw powder in Kane’s eyes. Kane doesn’t mind and kicks him in the face as the pain is imminent. The chokeslam is loaded up but Kane stops for some pushups. Now the chokeslam can finish Dean in a hurry.

We look back at the videos from JBL and Big Show, which don’t please Batista.

Earlier today, Coach annoyed Shawn Michaels (who looks weird in a suit) about Kurt Angle bragging over what happened at the Royal Rumble. Shawn suggests Angle focus on his match at No Way Out, even though Shawn has some incredible talent of his own.

HHH asks Batista about JBL. Batista wants to handle it himself but HHH says this is about all of Evolution. Tonight, Batista can worry about Edge and HHH will deal with JBL. Batista leaves and HHH says he has his back.

Chris Masters is coming.

Batista vs. Edge

HHH is at ringside. Edge’s headlock is broken up by Batista just lifting him into the air and it’s time to hammer in the corner. They head outside with Edge grabbing an Edge O Matic on the floor for a rather sick thud. Back in and Edge chokes on the rope, followed by a neckbreaker for two.

We hit the cravate for a bit until Batista powers up with a World’s Strongest Slam. A shoulder looks to set up the spinebuster but Edge reverses into the Edgecution. The spinebuster cuts off the spear and the Batista Bomb connects….as JBL’s limo arrives. HHH comes in and shoves the referee down and that’s a rather abrupt DQ.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have time to go anywhere and the ending was just there to protect both guys. That was about the only option they had other than Edge walking out so I can live with the lame DQ for a change. Batista and JBL isn’t likely to happen but it’s a box they need to check off before we can get to a bigger story.

Post match Flair waves Batista and HHH to the back with HHH saying this is about Evolution. Batista says it’s about him vs. JBL but here’s the limo to try and run Batista over. HHH shoves him out of the way as the limo drives off. Batista is ticked off and promises to go to Smackdown on his own to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. The holding pattern continues and there is only so much that Orton vs. Christian could do to save the rest of the show. That being said, this is pretty definitively the last show before we get to the stuff that really matters. Wrestlemania is coming and it’s going to be all about Batista, which is exactly what the fans want. The contract signing next week is going to change everything and it’s time to get things moving. This show wasn’t good, but it’s not like that is going to matter beyond next Monday.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s History Of In Your House (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/05/31/new-paperback-kbs-history-of-in-your-house/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – December 20, 2004 (Best Of 2004): I Never Know How To Rate These Things

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 20, 2004
Hosts: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

We’re near the end of the year and that means it’s time for a special episode. This is the Best Of 2004, which means that we’ll be seeing matches and moments from Raw and pay per views, which could make for a rather eventful evening. If nothing else it’s going to make for a shorter show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

These will likely be clipped versions of the matches but for the sake of simplicity, I’ll be including the full versions.

From Raw, November 22.

We open in the locker room with Shelton getting ready for his match when Trish Stratus comes in wearing a towel. She asks where he’s off to looking so pretty. That would be a six man tag because William Regal and Tajiri need him. Trish asks about her needs but Shelton thinks she’ll find someone else. An aghast Vince McMahon comes in and freaks out because it’s a woman in a towel. It’s scandalous because the moral fabric of America is being pulled apart by the sexual and racial overtones. Shelton: “EXCUSE ME?”

Vince: “Well Shelton, you may not realize this but you’re an African American. And everyone knows that African Americans are attracted to attractive white Canadian women with broken noses!” Vince goes on a rant about how this isn’t the NFL or the NBA where such actions could send Shelton into the audience in a violent rage. Shelton tells Vince to lighten up and the towel comes down as the Monday Night Football theme plays. Vince can’t kiss her because of the nose guard so he looks to the camera and asks if we’re ready for some wrestling.

So for those of you who weren’t watching American television in 2004, there was a Desperate Housewives vignette that aired before a Monday Night Football game, featuring Nicolette Sheridan and Terrell Owens doing the same thing. This was treated as the biggest disgrace in the history of television with people freaking out over a WOMAN IN A TOWEL (ok it was more her dropping the towel). It was stupid and completely overblown, though this opening has always been one of my favorites. Vince informing Shelton that he’s African American cracks me up every time as Shelton just looks lost.

Lawler and Coach welcome us to the show explaining the basic idea, which shouldn’t take more than about ten seconds.

From Wrestlemania XX.

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho wastes no time by punching him in the jaw and adding a clothesline for a bonus. A backdrop puts Christian on the floor and Jericho follows him out with a springboard dive. Back in and Christian backdrops him over the top and the big crash has Jericho in trouble for the first time. Back in and Christian cranks on the neck, followed by a chinlock for a change of pace.

A spinwheel kick gives Christian two but they ram heads to knock each other down. An exchange of rollups with an exchange of cheating get two each so Jericho goes with the bulldog. The Lionsault hits knees though and Christian grabs a backbreaker for two of his own. Christian grabs a Texas Cloverleaf to work on Jericho’s recently injured knee, which the announcers don’t actually mention.

That’s one of the reasons I was looking forward to watching this show with the TV beforehand. The Cloverleaf makes more sense when you know Jericho is coming in with a recent injury, but the commentators don’t bother mentioning it here, making the Cloverleaf seem a bit random. Jericho slips out and sends Christian to the floor, followed by a butterfly superplex for a delayed two. I believe there was a botched attempt that has been edited out of the Network version.

They’re both down so here’s Trish, with Lawler saying she can make jogging a spectator sport. An implant DDT gives Christian two and he drags Trish inside. Jericho makes the save and checks on her but Trish accidentally elbows him in the face. Christian’s rollup gives him the surprise pin.

Rating: B. This whole story has always been one of my favorites so it’s cool to see the match be a good one. It’s certainly no classic but Christian winning was the right call and the story can move forward from here. Both guys have gotten something out of this story and Trish is advancing as well. Good match, easily the best thing on the card so far.

Post match Trish apologizes to Jericho as Christian runs back in. Trish tries to hold Jericho back and then slaps him in the face over and over, morphing into Evil Trish (works for me), allowing Christian to hit the Unprettier. Christian and Trish leave but stop to kiss on the stage. This worked for everyone, especially Trish who works far better in this role.

Coach is asking Lawler to act more professionally, which takes us to a look at Eugene. Thankfully the HHH feud is mostly ignored.

We look at Shelton Benjamin’s true life stories, which are a great way to build up some sympathy for him.

From Raw, March 29.

Shelton Benjamin vs. HHH

Shelton now has his own generic rock music. HHH takes him into the corner to start and offers a polite slap to the face for the break. Shelton easily wrestles him down twice in a row, with a little slap of his own after the second. A shoulder drops Shelton but he pops up before HHH can even try the knee drop. The Pedigree is escaped but HHH says it was that close. A backslide gives Shelton a very close two and he does the “that close” gesture right back to HHH (which was in Shelton’s Titantron video for a long time).

HHH chops away in the corner as the fans remind HHH that he tapped out. The dragon whip gives Benjamin two and it’s off to an armbar. Cue Flair to back HHH up but Benoit follows him out and we take a break. Back with Shelton holding another armbar until HHH sends him in for the jumping knee. Shelton goes shoulder first into the post twice in a row and you can hear the relief in Lawler’s voice.

Right hands and the knee drop give HHH two and it’s time for the sleeper. You can hear Benoit playing cheerleader (there’s an image) until Shelton sends HHH face first into the buckle for the break. A jumping back elbow puts HHH down as he just can’t put Shelton away. Lawler is starting to panic a bit but HHH suplexing his way out of a sleeper calms him down a bit.

HHH dives into some raised boots (still the least believable spot in wrestling) and falls to the floor, allowing Shelton to hit a clothesline from the apron. The top rope clothesline gets two back inside and a powerslam is good for the same. A Pedigree attempt is countered into a jackknife cover for two more but Flair gets in a cheap shot. Benoit goes after Flair to distract HHH and it’s a Stinger Splash into a rollup to give Shelton the big upset.

Rating: B. So he won’t work Tuesdays but he’ll do the job on Mondays. This is the way you make someone look like a star and that’s exactly what they did here. Shelton is a great choice for a major push and it’s not like HHH is going to lose anything by putting him over here. It was even mostly clean with HHH getting distracted on his own and not being able to put Shelton away earlier. They did a good job here at making Shelton look good here though and that’s the right idea.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

We look at the Kane and Lita wedding.

Quick look at Gene Snitsky costing Lita her baby and Kane turning face again, because everything can be forgiven that simply.

From Taboo Tuesday.

Kane vs. Snitsky

They need a legal weapon, so here are the results:

Chain – 41%

Chair – 30%

Lead Pipe – 29%

Kind of weird as the chair and pipe have been used while the chain hasn’t been a factor at all. Lita actually comes out with Kane as the slow face turn continues. They get in an early tug of war over the chain, which Kane throws outside. Right hands in the corner have Snitsky in early trouble and the threat of a chokeslam sends him outside. Now we can have the chain but Snitsky takes it away, only to get caught with an uppercut.

Snitsky uses the chain to pull Kane into the post and it’s time to choke with the chain inside. Kane’s comeback is cut off with elbows and clotheslines. Some whips with the chain set up a choke, which just seems to annoy Kane more than anything else. Back up and Kane slugs away with a big boot giving us a double knockdown.

Snitsky is up first and goes for the chain but Lita takes it away. The chokeslam is broken up with right hands so Kane sends him over the top. A dropkick to the steps sends them into Kane’s knees and there’s a chair to his throat. Choking with the chair keeps Kane down and Snitsky actually Pillmanizes his throat. Kane is bleeding from the mouth but Snitsky, being a good monster, covers him anyway before the medics can come in to help.

Rating: D+. The wrestling was your usual garbage brawling but the point here is how awesome Snitsky is getting over as a monster. I know he has a very firm ceiling above him, but it’s nice to see them actually getting someone over. Raw has needed fresh blood for a long time now and Snitsky is certainly better than nothing.

The medics take their time helping Kane as Lita actually looks concerned. Snitsky continues being awesome by turning the stretcher over on the stage.

Last week, Lita promised Snitsky that Kane is coming back.

Video on Chris Benoit’s rise to the main event.

From Wrestlemania XX.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit vs. Shawn Michaels

HHH is defending and wearing white boots for a really weird look. We don’t get Big Match Intros but we do have a weapons check. The fans are behind Benoit here, to the surprise of no one paying attention. Benoit goes after both of them to start but Shawn wants to beat on HHH. A way too early Crossface attempt doesn’t work on Shawn, who is sent into HHH to knock the champ outside. The second Crossface attempt is countered into a rollup for two but HHH is back in to clothesline Michaels.

Now it’s Benoit being sent outside so Shawn and HHH can have their big showdown. That doesn’t last long (you save the big stuff for later) as HHH goes outside to drive Benoit into the barricade. Shawn is right up with a moonsault onto the two of them for a big crash. Back in and HHH hits the facebuster on Shawn but Benoit breaks up the Pedigree. Shawn goes shoulder first into the post, again leaving us with two instead of the three.

Benoit can’t get a belly to back superplex as HHH pulls him down into the Tree of Woe and whips Shawn into him for a near fall of his own. HHH gets sent into him as well for the same two but Benoit gets free for the rolling German suplexes. Michaels is right there to break up the Swan dive though, only to eat a DDT from HHH. With Shawn on the floor, HHH pulls Benoit off the top and hammers away.

That’s reversed into a Crossface with Shawn diving in for a save. Shawn tries his own rolling German suplexes on Benoit and I’ll let you guess how that goes. After Shawn bounces off the mat from Benoit’s third straight German suplex, the Swan Dive connects for two. Shawn forearms Benoit to the floor and nips up for the fight against HHH. The champ gets knocked down for the top rope elbow and Sweet Chin Music connects.

Benoit is right there to pull HHH to the floor of course and he sends Shawn into the post. The busted open Shawn (it wouldn’t feel right otherwise) gets caught in the Crossface so HHH grabs his hand to prevent the tap out. Benoit beats up HHH on the floor but gets sent into the steps. HHH loads up the announcers’ table and Shawn joins him to double suplex Benoit through the table. NOW we get the big Shawn vs. HHH showdown and it lasts all of fifteen seconds with Shawn whipping HHH over the corner and back outside.

Back in and HHH (also bleeding) hits a quick Pedigree but can’t cover. Benoit dives in for a last second save and all three are down. A Pedigree to Benoit is reversed into a Sharpshooter in the middle of the ring so it’s Shawn coming back in with more Sweet Chin Music. That’s only good for two so Shawn tries it again, only to be sent to the floor. The Pedigree is countered into the Crossface and Benoit rolls him into the middle for the tap and the title.

Rating: A+. I never realized how much the Wrestlemania XXX match copied this one, down to the big double team through the table, the technical star who had worked forever to get here and winning with a very similar hold, plus other things I’m probably overlooking. Anyway, there isn’t much to say here as the match speaks for itself. It’s long in the right way, the near falls were great, the work and visuals were incredible and the right guy won. I’m sure you’ve seen this one at least once and if you haven’t, find the time to sit down and watch Benoit’s crowning achievement.

Benoit is in tears as Eddie comes out for the big celebration. Confetti falls (another Wrestlemania XXX scene) and JR has almost lost his voice shouting about how amazing this was. The ending is a spectacular visual and what should have been one of the most memorable moments ever.

Quick look at This Is Your Life Mick Foley.

Video on the Diva Search. My goodness they won’t let this go.

Christy joins Coach and Lawler and rubs King’s chest. They go off camera together with Christy saying she wants his bod. That would be a body spray you see.

From Raw, December 6.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Trish is defending and Lita looks very happy to be in her hometown. They lock up to start and fall to the floor as JR gets on Lawler for worrying about Trish’s nose. JR: “We’ll have a parade for her next week.” Back in and Lita knocks her to the floor, setting up the suicide dive with Lita landing on her head and thankfully not dying. A shot with the mask gives Trish two and JR goes off on Lawler again, this time for being glad to see Trish’s face. Trish pulls her up for the choke in the corner until Lita snapmares her way out.

The sleeper is broken up though and we hit the seated full nelson. Lita fights up and catches Trish on top, meaning it’s a top rope superplex for the double knockdown. The delayed cover gets two and Trish is right back with a kick to the head. Right hands in the corner are countered with a powerbomb but Trish grabs the rope to block the snap DDT. Stratusfaction is countered into the reverse Twist of Fate and the moonsault gives Lita the pin and the title for her first reign in four years.

Rating: B. There was a great energy here and the fans wanted to see Lita FINALLY beat Trish and take the title. That’s because they spent time setting this story up and it made the payoff that much better. It’s a big deal and felt like an important moment because WWE treated it like an important moment. This was the main event of the show and that’s not something you saw very often at this point.

Video on Randy Orton being thrown out of Evolution.

Video on the rise of Batista.

From Survivor Series.

Team HHH vs. Team Orton

HHH, Batista, Gene Snitsky, Edge

Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven

There’s no Maven to start and Ric Flair is at ringside to make it 5-3. Benoit gets aggressive with Edge in the corner to start and elbows him in the face to take over. That’s enough to bring in Snitsky and Orton, which is quite the strange looking showdown. Their slugout doesn’t last long and it’s off to Jericho vs. HHH to keep up the alternating matchups. Orton is right back in to hammer on HHH with Flair panicking about HHH taking such a beating.

The jumping knee to the face gets HHH out of trouble and it’s Batista hitting his powerslam for two. Edge comes in and gets sent into the corner, allowing the quick tag to Benoit, who beats up everyone in short order. The rolling German suplexes have HHH in trouble and Benoit suplexes Edge onto him. A double Swan Dive gets two with Snitsky having to make a save.

The Sharpshooter has HHH In trouble but Snitsky makes another save. That’s enough for HHH to hit a quick Pedigree so Edge can pin Benoit for the first elimination. Jericho comes in next and gets taken down by a neckbreaker but HHH and Snitsky gets in a shouting match. HHH gets shoved down so Batista comes in to go nose to nose with Snitsky. Batista realizes what’s going on and breaks up the Walls on HHH.

Flair gets caught breaking up the Walls again and that means an ejection. With the referee taking care of Flair, Batista blasts Jericho and Orton with a double clothesline. Orton breaks up the big clothesline to Jericho with a belt shot and it’s a running enziguri to eliminate Batista. That’s not it for Batista to leave in peace though so he blasts Jericho with the big clothesline and then heads out. Snitsky comes in for stomping and choking instead of covering because he’s new at this. It’s off to Edge, who gets taken down with a sleeper drop but Snitsky breaks up the hot tag attempt. Everything breaks down again but here’s a bandaged up Maven to come in and go after Snitsky.

Maven’s middle rope bulldog takes HHH down but Snitsky caves his head in with a chair shot that would get him tossed out of the building today. Here it’s just a DQ, though HHH pins Maven with no trouble a second later. We’re down to HHH/Edge vs. Orton/Jericho with Jericho slipping out of the Pedigree but getting speared down for two. HHH and Edge smile down at Orton, who says bring it on.

The double stomping is on with Edge stomping away and handing it off to HHH, with JR losing his mind that Edge won’t get out of the ring. HHH’s DDT gets two and he argues with the referee, allowing Orton to roll him up for two. Edge comes in and accidentally spears HHH to give Orton the easy pin. We’re down to HHH vs. Orton with the former starting fast with a low blow. Orton gets up again and counters the Pedigree into the RKO for the pin. The Orton vs. HHH part was barely a minute and a half long.

Rating: B-. Perfectly watchable match here with Snitsky still being protected and Maven still being Maven. Other than that they’ve done a good job of making Orton look like a threat to the title, but the two Canadians are just kind of there with little reason to believe that they’re going to be a threat t o the title. That leaves us waiting until probably the Royal Rumble for a new challenger, meaning it’s time for winter vacation without missing any time from the show.

Last week’s announcement of the Elimination Chamber at New Year’s Revolution wraps things up.

Overall Rating: C. I never know how to rate these things as it’s not like the original content is anything more than a bridge between the clips. They covered almost every big moment on the show this year, though some of the stuff was rather random (Christian vs. Jericho from Wrestlemania but not Rock/Foley vs. Evolution?). A Smackdown version would be nice, but something like Tribute to the Troops is hard to top. This was every best of show you could ask for and it’s back to normal next week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – December 6, 2004 (2019 Redo): One Large Step For Women

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 6, 2004
Location: Cricket Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 4,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the final night of the guest host series for Raw and that means Chris Jericho is in charge. He has a big plate in front of him tonight with the controversial finish to last week’s World Title match where Chris Benoit and Edge both laid claim to the title. In a bigger deal though, Trish Stratus is defending the Women’s Title against Lita in a major showdown. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the Highlight Reel (of course) with Jericho promising a big party tonight. Since it’s a party, everyone gets laid tonight, so the leis fall from the ceiling, allowing Jericho to make some jokes about a few fans. Not wanting to be left out, he goes out and gets one himself (Jericho: “Everybody gets laid! You won’t get arrested!”). They’re imported from Hawaii, a tropical paradise, and what makes you think of the tropical paradise than Charlotte, North Carolina in December?

That’s not all though because tonight the Divas will be taking part in the Chris Jericho Rock and Roll Limbo A Go-Go, complete with music from Fozzy. With the announcements out of the way, we look at the end of last week’s show with Edge tapping just as Benoit got pinned. There’s nothing clear after several angles so Jericho needs some help. This brings out Vince McMahon, carrying the title in a better than expected visual. Vince didn’t see anything definitive either so that makes it a tie. He doesn’t like that either….so here’s a smug HHH to interrupt.

Post break, HHH isn’t exactly happy and yells at Batista for not being angry enough. Batista yells back this time, saying he was out there last week and saving HHH last week. There would be no controversy if it wasn’t for him and Benoit would be the champion. YOU’RE WELCOME! HHH turns over the coffee while shouting THANK YOU.

Jericho has a party in his office, with paint and balloons on the walls and various woman carousing. Christian comes in to rant about what looks like a superhero costume Jericho wants him to wear. Jericho loves the idea of Captain Charisma joining various other great captains, like Hook, Crunch and James T. Kirk. If Christian wants another Intercontinental Title shot, get in the costume. Christian leaves and Benoit comes in instead. He’s not happy with the situation so Jericho makes himself and Benoit against Batista/HHH, which does please Benoit.

We look at Trish tormenting Lita back in May. These segments were gold as Trish is so awesome in this role.

Eugene vs. Maven

William Regal is here with Eugene and doesn’t think much of Maven wanting a handshake. Eugene wrestles him down to start and strikes a bit of a dance as Maven certainly doesn’t seem pleased. A takedown sets up a bodyscissors with Eugene rolling him around and shaking the knees some more. Back up and Maven falls down but claims Regal tripped him, meaning an ejection. Eugene gets a northern lights suplex for two and Maven compliments him before kicking the knee out. The knee gets tied in the corner and Maven chokes until it’s a DQ.

Rating: D. Now this is more Maven’s speed and I didn’t get nearly as annoyed as I did before. Maven against someone like Eugene is something I can buy, unlike watching him against main event level talent. The heel turn isn’t likely to revitalize his career but at least he’s not in way over his head.

Post match Regal comes back in but gets decked by a title belt.

And now, a limbo contest with the Divas. Fozzy plays music, the girls limbo, Christy wins, and Jericho starts singing with Fozzy as we have a dance off. The lights go out though and it’s Muhammad Hassan and Daivari coming up on the screen. Hassan goes on about how great things can be before a single instance can change everything. Like on 9/11. He’ll be here next week and the party will stop. Better than limbo at least.

Simon Dean vs. Hurricane

This is Dean’s in-ring debut but first he needs to talk about the Fit-No-Powder. Hurricane cuts him off, but Dean is smart enough to just talk over the music. Dean offers him an amateur position and gets rolled up for an early two. A front facelock has Dean in the corner but he comes out with a right hand. Lawler: “Well you know what they say.” JR: “What do they say?” Lawler: “Uh…..”

Dean takes him down and a pendulum elbow sets up a pushup choke. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Hurricane’s back as Lawler compares him to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. He wishes. Hurricane comes back with a clothesline and headscissors, followed by the reverse Unprettier. The Shining Wizard misses though and Dean grabs a rollup with tights for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a match here as Dean’s run continues to die before our eyes. It’s not working and a feud with Hurricane and Rosey isn’t going to fix things. They tried something and it isn’t clicking, but at least they’re keeping him down low on the card and giving him a win. I wouldn’t get my hopes up though.

We see Trish’s bridal shower for Lita as the gold continues.

Randy Orton is happy with the World Title situation and laughs at Coach for not being able to get laid.

Here’s an angry Edge for a chat. He’s here to defend his World Title and now it’s vacant. The fans tell him that he tapped out as he explains what happened last week, albeit with a bit of a twist that puts him in a pretty positive light. Even Lawler can’t give him the benefit of the doubt on this one as Edge talks about how great it felt to have the World Title in his hands.

This is all Randy Orton’s fault because Orton didn’t do the right thing last week. It’s not his fault that Orton’s title reign was a failure so Orton needs to get out here right now. Cue Orton with the shirt coming off on the way down the ramp. He could have made it a singles match last week with Benoit vs. HHH instead so Edge should be grateful. They’ve been here before and Edge only has himself to blame. Edge is the only failure around here but Edge can’t remember all the times he’s beaten Orton. Edge declares Orton his b**** and the fight is on with agents breaking it up.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Captain Charisma

The Captain (Christian in a superhero costume if you aren’t paying attention) looks a bit like Daredevil with yellow trim. Shelton starts laughing at him and holds his hand out to stop a charge. Tyson Tomko gets on the apron for a distraction, even though it doesn’t seem to change anything as Christian takes over anyway. Shelton is right back with the top rope clothesline but Tomko forearms him in the back to really take over.

An abdominal stretch stays on the ribs but Christian lets it go and misses a charge into the corner. Christian gets punched out of the air and a middle rope sunset flip gets two. The Stinger Splash misses but Shelton lands on the ropes, only to get powerbombed down for two. Tomko gets involved again by throwing in the title, allowing him to boot Shelton in the face for two more. Shelton kicks Christian in the head to mess up the mask, setting up the exploder to retain.

Rating: D+. This could have been worse and it’s not like Shelton is going to run out of challengers. Christian has already been beaten a few times so this was hardly some big waste of a chance. The idea was funny enough, but with the Hurricane and Rosey already on the show, the superhero deal isn’t exactly an original idea.

Post match Jericho comes out and makes Orton vs. Edge for next week. As a bonus, he sings the Goodbye Song to Christian. For some reason, this isn’t included on the Network. With all the music stuff they do, that’s a copyright issue?

Smackdown Rebound (also not on the Network).

Next up: Trish interrupts Lita’s wedding. That outfit makes this roughly 14 times better.

Snitsky cuts Lita off in the back and takes credit for ruining Kane’s career. Tonight is Lita’s big night and it’s a shame her baby isn’t here to cheer her on.

We recap the World Title being vacated.

HHH calls Bischoff but gets the answering machine. The message turns into a plug for the book and Raw Magazine with Flair acting as pitchman. Batista comes in and hangs up the phone, pointing out how it’s kind of stupid to threaten the guy who handles the World Title situation. There is only one World Champion but Batista doesn’t say who that is. Flair: “He’s talking about you!”

HHH/Batista vs. Chris Benoit/Chris Jericho

Lilian Garcia introduces HHH as the former World Champion so he chases her into the crowd. Benoit chops at Batista to start as they ride out the WE WANT FLAIR chants. It’s off to HHH, who gets chopped by both Canadians and suplexed by Benoit for two. The Crossface is broken up due to feet in the ropes and Batista adds a save. The fans still want Flair but settle for Jericho punching HHH down.

A whip over the corner puts HHH on the floor and a double dropkick sends Batista out next to him. Back from a break with Batista putting Jericho in a camel clutch after hitting a spinebuster during the break. Evolution takes turns stomping Jericho in the corner with Batista adding a boot choke. Jericho dropkicks the knee out to send Batista face first into the middle buckle and it’s the hot tag to Benoit.

Everything breaks down and Benoit decks Flair from the apron, which the fans don’t exactly like. Batista gets knocked off the apron though and Benoit rolls the German suplexes on HHH, which the fans like a lot more. The Lionsault sets up the Swan Dive into the Walls/Crossface combination but Batista makes the save. Another spinebuster drops Benoit but HHH hits him with a chair for the rather dumb DQ.

Rating: C+. The energy was there and HHH snapping is a good enough story. This is part of the bigger story though, even if it’s all but destined to end with HHH as champion again. Batista’s frustrations are starting to grow though and that is a good sign for the future. They’re taking the slow burn path and that’s best for everyone.

Post match HHH chairs Benoit (who is gushing blood) again and loads up one on Jericho, only to hit Batista by mistake. Jericho takes a shot of his own and HHH checks on Batista. Flair holds Batista’s head and HHH leaves, ranting about the title.

Some production guys check out Trish as she bends over for a stretch. After they’re scared off, Lita comes in and Trish asks whose career she’s ending tonight. Lita says yours and kisses Trish. Lawler’s reaction is much more subdued than you would expect.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita

Overall Rating: C-. The last half hour nearly saved the show with a hot angle and a very good main event. Other than that though, it was another week of waiting for another show as we still don’t get the big moment. They’ll wait for January to actually give us anything in the annual December Doesn’t Matter push and that’s something you knew was coming.

The main event is what really matters here as it would be the benchmark for the women’s division for over ten years. This match was the main event of Monday Night Raw and treated like the biggest thing on the show, which just did not happen at this point. I know they’ve been surpassed and lapped several times, but Lita and Trish really did take the division to a place it hadn’t been in the modern era here and that’s worthy of some praise.

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Monday Night Raw – November 29, 2004: You Were Expecting Something Clear?

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 29, 2004
Location: 1^st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 5,300
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re in week three of Team Orton running the show and in this case it’s Randy Orton himself in charge. His first order of business: HHH defending the World Title in a battle royal, which should all but guarantee a new champion. Now let’s see how our beloved champion gets to outsmart everyone this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Raw World Title: Battle Royal

Edge, Gene Snitsky, Ric Flair, Steven Richards, Tyson Tomko, Rob Conway, Sylvan Grenier, Jonathan Coachman, Christian, Shelton Benjamin, Viscera, Rhyno, Eugene, Chris Benoit, Maven, Tajiri, Rosey, William Regal, Batista, Chris Jericho, Val Venis, HHH

The fight starts before Batista comes out, so we watch that in full and come back to everyone standing still again. Hold on though as here’s Vince McMahon to say that this isn’t happening due to reasons of anyone can win. Can you imagine someone like Steven Richards as the World Champion? It’s a #1 contenders match instead, but the winner will get their shot tonight so you’re still getting a title match.

Battle Royal

Everyone starts fighting as Edge chills on the steps without ever having gotten in. Hurricane dives at Viscera for some reason but since Viscera isn’t that bright, he can’t throw him out just yet. A bunch of people get together and toss Viscera, followed by Tajiri eliminating his own partner Rhyno. Tomko is out next and Maven gets rid of Grenier, only to get tossed by Eugene. Back from a break with Benoit and Edge chopping it out in the middle of the ring and Coach having eliminated himself rather than be chopped by Benoit again.

Regal and Rosey both go out at Snitsky’s hands, followed by Batista tossing Hurricane. That means a Snitsky vs. Batista showdown until everyone else breaks it up due to reasons of wrestling stupidity. Batista starts cleaning house, including tossing Eugene, Tajiri, Christian, Venis and Flair in just a few seconds. The fans are WAY into that as we take a break. Back again with Jericho dropkicking Snitsky out, leaving us with Jericho, Benoit, Richards, Edge, Benjamin and Batista.

Richards starts celebrating and gets beaten down to leave us with five. Shelton unloads on Edge in the corner as JR is on fire with the over the top call here. The stomping goes on a bit too long though and Edge sends Benjamin to the apron, setting up a spear for the elimination. Jericho charges at Batista and gets tossed, leaving Benoit to German suplex Edge. Benoit low bridges Batista out though and we’re down to the two Canadians. They both wind up on the apron and fall to the floor for the double elimination.

Rating: D+. So there’s the latest version of the double winner battle royal as we set up a likely triple threat match tonight. The match was far longer than it needed to be, though they got us down to a good collection of talent at the end. Having it come after a bait and switch certainly didn’t help either.

In the back, two referees both tell Randy Orton what they think they saw, which of course is a split decision. The referees leave and Vince comes in to tell Orton that it’s his call. Edge comes in to plead his case, offering Orton a title shot if he gets to face HHH tonight. Orton says he’ll think about it, which isn’t good enough for Edge. The boss leaves and Edge is furious.

Maven is annoyed that he hasn’t won anything in the last few weeks. Eugene comes in and asks for help putting his Tag Team Title on. That’s too far for Maven and Shelton Benjamin has to get between them. After four years of work, Maven doesn’t have anything and Eugene can’t even spell title. Eugene spells title so Maven goes after him, with William Regal breaking it up. Maven sits back down.

Candice Michelle stops Orton to ask if her new dress is appropriate. Orton approves, but here’s Benoit to demand the title shot tonight. Benoit would win the title if he had the chance and so he wants his chance. Orton promises to fix things.

Here’s Orton to fix things. Well in a minute as first he announces Regal/Eugene vs. La Resistance for the Tag Team Titles and Jerry Lawler (the birthday King) vs. Ric Flair. Other than that, we can have a triple threat match with Benoit and Edge challenging HHH for the title. I’ve heard worse ideas, though not many less interesting.

Lawler goes to get ready so Jonathan Coachman takes his place.

Lita/Victoria vs. Molly Holly/Trish Stratus

The villains jump them from behind and it’s Victoria getting suplexed down. Trish comes in to start kicking at the arm as the announcers go over HHH’s odds to retain the title. It’s back to Molly for a swinging neckbreaker as the back of Victoria’s trunks has torn, which is made even worse given how small they were in the first place. Molly cuts off the comeback with a kick to the ribs and it’s a stomping down in the corner.

The running seated dropkick gets two and a running elbow keeps Victoria away from Lita again. The Chick Kick is blocked and now it’s off to Lita, meaning Trish gets to panic. Lita can’t quite hit a running splash in the corner so it’s a snap suplex instead. A sleeper has Trish in trouble but Molly makes the save and sends Victoria outside. Molly gets knocked out as well though and it’s the snap DDT to finish Trish.

Rating: D+. This could have been a lot worse and the fans are wanting to see Lita take Trish’s head off when she gets the chance. It was a smart move to keep things short at Survivor Series, because the build wasn’t quite done just yet. That was some smart storytelling and they could get some extra mileage out of this story for a better result.

Muhammad Hassan and Daivari montage, with clips of their previous rants.

Ric Flair vs. Jerry Lawler

This is billed as a Legends Match. JR mentions Lawler’s resume and major title wins, which is a good thing to bring up every now and then. How many younger fans see Lawler as an old guy and not a wrestler? Lawler mocks the strut to start and gets shoved, so it’s a slap to Flair’s face. Flair gets knocked down and that’s another strut from Lawler. A slugout goes to Lawler and we get the required Flair Flop.

Flair gets in a cheap shot out of the corner and the comeback is on, including the knee drop. The comeback takes all of two seconds as Lawler elbows him in the face and hits the middle rope fist drop. As you probably saw coming though, Lawler bangs up his knee on the way down though and Flair is rather pleased. A chop block sets up the Figure Four with a grab of the ropes to make Lawler tap.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to it but these two know how to do a paint by numbers match in their sleep. The fans are always going to react to Lawler because he’s one of the all time great performers and has forgotten more about working a crowd than most of the modern roster will ever know. Yeah they’re both old and the match was just a quick filler, but you can see the knowledge and talent on full display.

Melina has been signed as the newest Raw Diva and she hugs Orton for giving her the chance. Melina: “If there’s anything I can do to thank you for the favor, let me know.” Maria comes in as well and Orton has an idea. They won’t be wrestling, but they’ll be in the ring doing something.

Wrestlemania Recall: Benoit wins the title.

We get another Shelton Benjamin video, this time talking about all of the drug issues in his hometown. He was in the middle of firefights and got out as soon as he could. Eventually he found his way out through sports, which got him to college.

With the emotional story out of the way, here is Orton, flanked by Maria, Candice and Melina. Orton thinks we need more hot women though so here are Christy Hemme and Stacy Keibler. So why are they here? Lingerie fashion show. There isn’t much to say here as they all strip, they all look good, they dance rather close to Orton and they all get cheered. A group hug wraps it up.

Is this supposed to make us want to like Orton? The tall, handsome wrestler who gets to hit on the gorgeous women that he probably could get regularly? Orton added nothing to this segment and it could have been anyone running the thing to the same result. This was over ten minutes long, or longer than anything but the battle royal tonight. I get the appeal, but could you be a little more subtle with this stuff?

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. William Regal/Eugene

Regal and Eugene are defending. Eugene shoulders Conway down to start as we hear about the lingerie from the previous segment being auctioned off on WWE.com. As I shake my head, it’s Regal coming in and getting taken to the mat in a bit of a surprise. Eugene gets knocked off the apron and it’s time to Hulk Up, after a legal tag of course. House is cleaned but the crowd is dead after the previous segment. The airplane spin has Conway in trouble and the top rope ax handle gets two. Au Revoir is broken up and it’s a Stunner to finish Grenier.

Rating: D+. The wrestling was watchable for such a short match but the lack of a reaction was really noticeable. There’s only so much you can do when your crowd is dead after a segment like the previous one and there was nothing these guys could do. It’s almost like the fans came to a wrestling show to see wrestling and not a long segment that didn’t add anything to the show.

Post match Eugene brings the kids in to celebrate but Maven runs out and sends him into the steps.

Trish thinks Chris Jericho finds the face mask funny but Jericho thinks she looks great. He also finds it funny that she called Lita the walking Kiss of Death but tonight, the walking KOD beat the walking STD. Next week, Lita gets her title shot.

How to bid on lingerie!

Flair and Batista yell at each other over the battle royal. Good thing they waited an hour and a half to have this talk. HHH comes in to rant about the triple threat but both of them calm him down. Batista sounds a little tentative when he says he has HHH’s back.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit vs. Edge

HHH is defending. Benoit goes after Edge as the champ chills in the corner, watching as Edge knocks Benoit to the floor. Back in and HHH knocks Edge to the floor and whips Benoit chest first into the corner for a pair of twos. Edge comes in again and it’s time for Benoit to take over with some alternating chops. A double clothesline puts Edge and HHH on the floor, setting up a double dive to take them both down again as we take a break.

We come back with HHH down on the floor and Benoit putting Edge in the Sharpshooter. HHH’s save attempt is countered into the Crossface but here are Flair and Batista to make the save. Orton comes out to eject both of them, leaving HHH to hit a spinebuster for two on Edge. Benoit comes back in for the suplexes, setting up the Sharpshooter to Edge’s already banged up back.

Instead of immediately saving, HHH posts Orton first and then breaks things up. HHH gets taken down again and it’s more rolling German suplexes on Edge. Benoit goes up top but has to knock Edge away, giving us a ref bump. The chair is brought in but Orton takes it away from HHH and chairs him over the barricade. Edge is back up for the spear, which is countered into a Crossface with another referee running in. That’s reversed with a rollup that doesn’t break the hold, meaning he taps out at the same time the referee counts three for the double finish.

Rating: C+. There was good action but I rolled my eyes a bit at the match having the same kind of ending as the opener, even with the same people. I’m sure this will set up something else down the line, because that’s what this whole story has been since Survivor Series: a bunch of stuff that makes you wait until next time without giving you anything concrete.

The two referees and the two Canadians argue over who wins to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. A bunch of mostly bad wrestling with Orton offering nothing as the boss for the night makes this another weak show. At least something kind of happened in the main event, but we’re sorry because your definitive deal is on another episode. Benoit vs. Edge for the title is what makes sense and if you think that’s what we’re getting, you haven’t been paying enough attention.

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Monday Night Raw – November 22, 2004: One Of The Funniest Things WWE Has Ever Done

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 22, 2004
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s time to continue the Survivor Series fallout, this time with someone else running the show. Last week’s Maven Show is going to be hard to beat as Maven challenging for the title wasn’t fooling anyone. At least that’s out of the way now and we can stop pretending that Maven is anywhere near that level. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Chris Benoit, who is in charge this week. He loves the idea of more wrestling and wants to simplify things tonight. There is a contract on his door and anyone who wanted a match tonight just had to sign up. Some people have already signed up so tonight it’s Maven vs. Gene Snitsky, Batista vs. Chris Jericho, Trish Stratus defending the Women’s Title against Lita and Molly Holly, and Jonathan Coachman against JR. We need a main event though and as luck would have it, there’s a steel cage above the ring. As you might have guessed, Benoit himself will be challenging HHH for the World Title inside that cage.

Maven vs. Gene Snitsky

Maven is still banged up but is fine enough to snap Snitsky’s throat across the top rope on his way in. A dropkick sends Snitsky out to the floor and seems to annoy him more than anything else. Snitsky pulls him down and crushes Maven’s head against the post for two as the announcers talk about how Maven should have joined Evolution last week (egads people let it go).

A half crab keeps Maven down and Snitsky slides him across the mat into the post. Maven can barely do that right as the slide is in slow motion. Snitsky misses a charge and Maven hits a high crossbody for two, followed by the top rope bulldog for the same. A big boot cuts Maven down though and it’s the pumphandle slam to give Snitsky the pin.

Rating: D. What else were you expecting? Neither of these two are worth much in the ring, though at least Snitsky beat him pretty decisively. It’s not working with Maven and WWE is right to move him back down the card where he belongs. Snitsky doesn’t have the highest ceiling in the world, but it’s a lot higher than Maven’s, at least right now.

HHH is panicking over the cage match but Batista says they have his back. That doesn’t work well because Batista has been screwing up left and right lately. Ric Flair tries to calm things down but HHH says the point of this team is to keep the title on him. HHH bets that Batista is losing tonight. They separate and things aren’t good.

Here’s Stacy Keibler to shoot t-shirts into the crowd. She pulls out a copy of the Rise and Fall of ECW DVD but that brings out Simon Dean to interrupt. He thinks the people need a DVD that they could actually use. It’s a Simon System DVD, which the people need to protect themselves around Thanksgiving. Women like Stacy are interested in men like him, because he’s actually in shape. Stacy says no because he looks in the mirror more than she does, which doesn’t sit well with him. Threats are made so here’s Hurricane for the save. Simon beats him down with the weightlifting belt so Rosey makes the real save.

Two women (Candace Michelle and Melina) are in the back talking about Batista and HHH when Batista and Flair (Flair: “Maybe later ladies.”) come by with Batista ranting about how he can beat Jericho and he’ll prove it tonight.

Batista vs. Chris Jericho

Rating: D+. This was starting to get somewhere but they were smart to end it that way. Batista looks like the monster who was out to prove himself at all cost, which is exactly what they should have done. Jericho didn’t get squashed, but the point here was to make Batista look like the Animal and that’s what they did.

Post match Batista lays Jericho out with the big clothesline to the back of the head.

Post break, HHH sarcastically claps for Batista and asks for his $100. Batista doesn’t want to hear it because he walked out while HHH got carried out. HHH doesn’t like it because he wanted Batista to win. Batista has a million dollar body and a ten cent brain and if HHH needs to find a replacement, he’ll have no problem getting one. Flair is sent to talk to the livid Batista, but he tells HHH to back off.

Edge looks at a clip of him attacking Christian last week while shouting that it wasn’t his fault. He’s a lone wolf now and deserves a shot at the World Title, but Benoit is getting his own shot. Everyone knows he’s earned a shot so let’s take a poll of people in the back about whether Edge should get a shot at the title. Christy Hemme says no so Edge tells her to apologize to her mirror every morning. A production guy says no because he voted for Shawn Michaels at Taboo Tuesday. Edge is about to kill him so here’s Benoit to break it up. Edge storms off instead.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Jim Ross

Hang on though as Benoit pops up on screen to say that there has been a misunderstanding. See, Coach wrote JR on the signup sheet, which Benoit thought meant Just Rhyno.

Jonathan Coachman vs. Rhyno

Coach gets in a microphone shot and some right hands before the Gore finishes him in less than thirty seconds.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Molly Holly

Trish is defending in fallout from Lita getting beaten down by the two of them. The heel alliance starts early and they take turns choking Lita on the ropes. Lita slips out of a double suplex and grabs Trish’s mask. A double clothesline in the corner has Molly and Trish in more trouble but Trish is right back with a middle rope clothesline.

Lita gets in a quick rollup for two before hammering on the champ in the corner. Trish’s face is slammed into the mat but Molly throws Lita outside. The Molly Go Round connects with Lita diving back in for the save, followed by the hard DDT to Molly. Trish makes her own save and steals the pin to retain.

Rating: C. The match might have been a little sloppy and short, but they were showing an extra fire that you don’t often get from the women’s division of this era. Trish vs. Lita is building up rather well and as soon as Lita can keep her head on straight, she should be running through Trish for the title in a nice moment.

Post match Lita chokes Trish out and grabs at the mask again.

Flair tries to calm Batista down again as Batista gets his arm wrapped up, saying everyone goes through something like this. When HHH is ready to leave, Batista is ready to be the man. That’s not worth it to Batista, who is tired of waiting his turn. Flair: “I’VE BEEN TIRED FOR THIRTY TWO YEARS!” Flair doesn’t want this to turn into another Orton situation, but Batista says he wouldn’t regret it.

Video on Shelton Benjamin’s hometown, which included a lot of drug dealings and violence. Shelton got into trouble when he was in high school and was even a shoplifter who carried a gun with him to school. He got expelled, but he’s not proud of it. Rather random video, but these are effective most of the time, which was the case here.

Shelton Benjamin/William Regal/Eugene vs. La Resistance/Christian

Tyson Tomko is here with the villains. Regal gets taken into the wrong corner to start but Grenier is right back with a snapmare to take over. It’s off to Eugene for a headlock but he’s taken into the corner as well, allowing Christian to snap the back of his neck across the top rope. The choking begins and Conway makes it even worse by grabbing Eugene in a reverse chinlock (like a neckbreaker but with pulling instead of dropping).

Since it’s another chinlock, Eugene gets out without much effort and brings Shelton in to clean house. The top rope clothesline gets two on Conway with Tomko breaking up the cover. La Resistance hits a Hart Attack for two on Benjamin but Regal wrecks both of them. Eugene Stuns Conway into the exploder to give Benjamin the pin

Rating: C-. Completely watchable match here with the two feuds (Are these feuds?) being thrown into a single match for the sake of simplicity. Regal and Eugene are a fun team and while they’re not going to hold the titles very long, they’re a nice pickup every week. Benjamin on the other hand is looking like a star every time he’s out there.

Eugene brings the kids in for the post match dance.

Muhammad Hassan and Daivari complain about travel and threaten to beat respect into anyone who gets in his way.

Smackdown Rebound.

The cage is lowered.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit

Chris Benoit vs. Edge

Inside a cage. Benoit starts swinging right away and takes Edge into the corner for the chops. A hard whip takes Benoit down though and Edge gets a chance to hammer away for a change. Edge starts going after the back so Benoit sends him face first into the cage. There’s a baseball slide to drive Edge into the cage as this is more about the violence so far than the win. Edge slips out of a Crossface attempt and sends Benoit shoulder first into the post.

Benoit is right back with a catapult into the buckle for two as JR compares this to being trained in the Dungeon. Something tells me there weren’t a lot of catapults into buckles in there. A good crotching slows Benoit down and Edge kicks away in the Tree of Woe. They collide in the corner as Batista is shown watching in the back. We come back from a break with Edge chinlocking a bloody Benoit.

With that not working so well, Edge hammers away with right hands and sends him into the cage again. It’s still too early to escape though as Benoit pulls him back down, sending Edge face first into the buckle. The rolling Germans are on with Benoit hitting five in a row this time. Now it’s Benoit’s chance to go up but Edge makes a save of his own.

Rating: B-. Nice cage match but going from what was supposed to be a World Title match to this didn’t do it any favors. Edge messing up again and costing himself the big win will fuel his rage all the more, but does this really change anything? There’s no storyline advancement for this and Benoit winning is just a consolation prize.

Batista tells Flair he’s going to the ring and wants to see HHH out there. Flair needs to decide whose side he’s on.

They even pay off the doctor, who HHH says was worth every penny. HHH wasn’t going to fight in a cage because Benoit was running the shoe. He explains the entire play (which doesn’t have that many steps) and gives the MVP award to Batista. That was a performance worthy of an Academy Award (IT’S AN EMMY BECAUSE IT’S ON TELEVISION!!! STOP GETTING THAT WRONG!!!). HHH: “Or at least a Slammy!”

After posing with the title, HHH calls out the women but gets Randy Orton instead. He’s in charge next week, which doesn’t scare HHH because Orton can’t get a title match. Orton has two options for HHH: they face off one on one next week and if Orton wins, that stipulation is gone. HHH cuts him off before the second option is read and says no, so Orton goes with option #2: HHH defends the title in a battle royal. The roster comes out to the stage so the champ can panic to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. The matches did get better as the show went on, but there is no hiding the fact that nothing is happening at the moment. We’ve literally gone two weeks and the biggest development is Regal and Eugene winning the Tag Team Titles. HHH has had to defend the title against Maven and tonight he gets to be the genius who keeps the title again. You know there are going to be shenanigans next week as well, because that’s what this show is all about anymore. Nothing happened on this show, and that seems to be by design.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – November 1, 2004 (2019 Redo): Wrestling For Your Corporate Future

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 1, 2004
Location: Peoria Civic Center, Peoria, Illinois
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

The big story this week is the locker room rising up against Evolution, who ran roughshod last week because Eric Bischoff was gone and they just decided they were in charge. Randy Orton isn’t allowed to challenge HHH for the World Title anymore, making me wonder who in the world is supposed to go after the belt. Odds are no one at the moment, meaning more HHH bragging time. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at the locker room fighting back against Evolution last week, with a focus on Orton not getting to challenge HHH again because he lost to Ric Flair. No worries though as he hit HHH with an RKO to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Eugene vs. Gene Snitsky

Hardcore match with Snitsky wheeling out a baby carriage. In the back, William Regal explains a hardcore match to Eugene, who says he has to do this himself and stand on his own two feet. I don’t see this going well. The fans are behind Eugene as he slugs away with a broom handle to as much success as you would expect.

Snitsky is fine enough to hit him with a chain and pulls out a NO BABIES sign to blast Eugene again. A slam onto a sign keeps Eugene in trouble but he gets in a shot with the chair for a breather. Some leather strap shots to the back put Snitsky down as the fans are WAY into this. Snitsky shrugs it off though and it’s pumphandle slam onto a street sign for the pin.

Rating: D+. They’re keeping Snitsky short here and that’s the right idea. Let him be a monster and beat up the popular guys without overexposing him, which has worked for years and it’s working here. Eventually someone can slay the monster, but the longer they build him up, the better this is going to be.

Post match Snitsky loads up the chair around Eugene’s neck but Regal runs in with the brass knuckles for the save. The father figure role is working well for Regal, because you know he can back it up if he has to.

HHH says everyone attacked him last week because they’re jealous of him. They attacked the biggest star in WWE today and the guy bringing the people into those arenas (3,500 out of 18,000 in Milwaukee for Taboo Tuesday anyone?). He won’t be there tonight so let’s see how things go without the franchise player. There better be a hero’s welcome for him when he gets back next week.

New interviewer Maria Kanellis talks to Tajiri, who is glad HHH is gone because the locker room is sick of him. Batista and Ric Flair come in for the beatdown.

Here are Batista and Flair in the arena with Flair saying what happened to HHH last week was unacceptable. Like him or not, the fans all need to respect HHH because he is the World Champion. If you don’t treat him with respect, Batista has no problem with destroying the entire locker room.

This brings out Bischoff, who doesn’t want to hear anymore. He gets right to the point, annoying three matches for Survivor Series: Christian vs. Shelton Benjamin for the Intercontinental Title, Trish Stratus defending the Women’s Title against Lita and Team HHH (HHH, Batista, Edge, Gene Snitsky) vs. Team Randy Orton (Randy Orton, Chris Jericho, Chris Benoit, Maven). Flair doesn’t like his name being left off that team but Bischoff says it’s because of what happened last week. He wants to see the inmates run the asylum even more because he’s tired of having Flair try to boss people around.

Evolution didn’t come to his rescue at Taboo Tuesday so what has he gained by sucking up to them for two and a half years (as usual, Bischoff isn’t great on details). Therefore, he has an idea: he’s going on vacation for a month after Survivor Series and the winning team is going to get Raw for that time, with each member getting to be in charge for a week. Batista doesn’t find that to be fair because Benoit and Jericho would just give themselves title matches. That sounds like a threat so Bischoff says they better win at Survivor Series. So there’s your next six weeks and while it could be worse, I don’t buy Bischoff’s new style lasting.

Christian vs. Hurricane

Christian grabs a headlock takeover but here’s Edge less than ten seconds in. He’s back on Raw and has his book, which apparently includes a lot of material on Christian. The book is available tomorrow and you can read about his likes and dislikes, such as Peoria. The only problem is he wanted the last chapter to focus on his winning the vote at Taboo Tuesday and won the World Title. Don’t worry: he can have an epilogue in the paperback.

Edge goes to leave but sees the angry JR, who must want an autographed copy. We get to the match for once with Hurricane hitting a running neckbreaker for two. Hurricane gets the same off a high crossbody but gets sent into the post, setting up the Unprettier to give Christian the pin. More than half of the match was on Edge, which is a really questionable decision during a match featuring the #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title.

Post match Shelton Benjamin runs in to chase Christian off. Christian yells at Shelton for costing him the vote at Taboo Tuesday. He knows Shelton wants to fight but since Tomko is hurt, here’s a one night only problem solver: Viscera, giving Shelton a great “are you serious?” look. The double beatdown is on with Shelton taking a World’s Strongest Slam. Note that this is the same day that Test and A-Train were released. They see Viscera with more upside than A-Train?

Edge is happy to be back because he’s ready to defend the Tag Team Titles tonight. Since Benoit beat La Resistance on his own, tonight should be an easy title defense. Benoit comes up and Edge takes a title (with Sylvan Grenier’s nameplate still front and center), saying Benoit better watch his attitude or it’ll be another solo defense tonight.

Maven goes in to see Evolution because he didn’t like what happened to Tajiri earlier. Flair gets rather serious but Orton and Jericho come in as well and Evolution backs down.

Here’s Simon Dean live in person to give away a year’s supply of products. After insulting a woman, he calls in a fan with limited teeth….and that is the future Beer City Bruiser of Ring of Honor fame. I had no idea he had been around that long. Anyway Dean makes fun of his weight and the fan loses it, earning himself a beatdown.

Lawler has a thing called a Juicebox, a portable device that lets you watch video clips, look at photos and listen to MP3s. Oh those wacky 2004 flashes in the pans.

Tag Team Titles: La Resistance vs. Chris Benoit/Edge

Edge and Benoit are defending but there’s no Edge to start so Benoit has to go it alone again, though he’s fine enough to hit a backbreaker on Grenier. Conway gets in a neckbreaker to take over though and Benoit is in trouble. Cue Edge, with a full entrance, to distract Benoit even more and the beating continues. Benoit finally gets in a suplex for a breather but Edge walks out as we take a break.

Back with Edge on commentary and showing him the new book. Grenier cranks on a cravate as JR snaps as only he can at this level of disrespect. The comeback is on as we discuss Edge’s high school yearbook and neck surgery. Benoit snaps off a bunch of suplexes, including a few German versions to Conway. The Swan Dive connects and the Crossface goes on as Edge gets in to distract the referee, leaving Benoit to take Au Revoir to give La Resistance the titles back.

Rating: D. The wrestling wasn’t the point here of course, though Edge was hilarious on commentary as he’s kind of perfect for this role. It also makes sense to have him not care about the Tag Team Titles because, as he mentioned at Taboo Tuesday, he’s held them ten times before and it’s time for him to step up to the next level. We really, really need some new champions though as it feels like La Resistance has held the titles for years.

Post match Edge hits him with the belt (blood) and a spear, plus a Crossface to make Benoit tap. That was better than anything in the match.

Evolution comes in to Bischoff’s office and yells about the Survivor Series stipulation. He demands that Bischoff change things but that’s a no (you don’t have to ask Bischoff twice to screw Flair over). Bischoff doesn’t get why people want him to have so much power but he’ll use some of it tonight. We’re going to have a six man tag: Evolution vs. Jericho/Maven/Orton. HHH isn’t here but if he doesn’t show up, it can just be a handicap match.

Here’s the debuting Muhammad Hassan, who says he’s an Arab American and born right here in the United States. Since 9/11, he’s been stereotyped as a terrorist who blows things up. Now, please be respectful to him. He praises Allah and Khosrow Daivari, his manager, translates to Arabic. Right now, someone needs to pop up with a sign telling them to GO BACK! YOU’RE NOT SMART ENOUGH TO DO THIS!

Survivor Series rundown.

We look back at Viscera and Christian attacking Shelton Benjamin.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Viscera

Non-title and Benjamin has taped up ribs. Viscera goes straight for the ribs and takes the tape off, setting up the big fat splashes in the corner. The belly to belly suplex crushes the ribs again and a big elbow makes it even worse. Viscera tries a charge (work with me here) into the corner but gets drop toeholded into the middle buckle instead. For some reason Shelton tries the exploder and gets crushed for another near fall. With Christian cheering Viscera on from the stage, Shelton grabs a handful of face and hits the Dragon Whip for the fast pin.

Rating: F. They went with this over A-Train??? I know A-Train isn’t great but he’s a heck of a lot more mobile and versatile than Viscera, whose entire offense revolves around being 500lbs. The match was nothing with Benjamin hitting the finisher and Viscera looking like a turtle on his back.

Post match Christian comes in for the stomping and takes the exploder.

Smackdown Rebound.

Here’s Trish Stratus for a chat. She’s here to calm down her friends and family who have been panicking since they found out she’s facing Lita at Survivor Series. We see a video of Lita’s managing over the years, including her time with Essa Rios (Me when I was about twelve: “Rios is awesome. If he can get rid of that annoying redhead, he’ll be a lot better.”) who disappeared, the Hardys….who are gone as well (Trish, narrating: “TL-C you later.”) and the time with Kane where he got his throat crushed (Trish: “Ding dong the freak is dead!”) because Lita is the kiss of death.

Back in the arena, Trish talks about Lita being more than a walking kiss of death. She’s a loser too and at Survivor Series, she’ll lose the match just like she lost her baby. Cue Lita and Trish knows she’s screwed up. The beating is on in a hurry with Lita bouncing Trish’s head off the mat. Gail Kim comes in for the save and the beatdown is on, capped off by a Chick Kick to leave Lita laying. Trish is on fire at the moment and I want to see Lita take her head off so well done all around.

More voter registration stuff.

Maven/Randy Orton/Chris Jericho vs. Evolution

There’s no HHH but Maven is on the other team so is it really a handicap? Orton and Batista start things off with Batista charging into a boot in the corner and getting rolled up for two. Flair comes in and gets punched down as well, setting up the backdrop so Flair can get in the trademark screaming. It’s off to Jericho for the Walls, which he releases so we can have a three on one staredown of Batista before he can interfere.

We settle back down to Maven hitting a missile dropkick on Flair and it’s time to stare at Batista again. Jericho comes in to beat up Flair some more and even draws Batista in to distract the referee, meaning it’s a low blow to Ric. Batista finally gets smart by coming in and decking Jericho so he can drag Flair to the corner for the tag. The spinebuster gets two on Jericho and Flair is fine enough to start the chopping.

The running enziguri drops Flair to get Jericho out of trouble so it’s back to Orton vs. Batista. Yet another backdrop has Flair in trouble and there’s the powerslam to Batista for two. A double dropkick sends Batista outside so it’s time for Evolution to leave. HHH’s music hits though….and it’s Tajiri, spitting mist instead of water (which the camera misses). Batista gets thrown back inside and with Flair dropkicked to the floor, the parade of finishers begins. The RKO is enough to put Batista away for good.

Rating: D+. Well that certainly happened. It’s fairly clear that Batista and Flair aren’t as good as two former World Champions plus Maven with an assist from Tajiri. In case you were ever wondering about that, you now have your answer. Other than that, the only thing this match made me do is wonder why we never had a HHH vs. Jericho title match around this time. They had a lumberjack match a few weeks ago that barely lasted five minutes and was more about other things than their match. A one off title match, even on a low level pay per view, wouldn’t have been out of the question.

The good guys pose on the stage and Batista shoves Flair down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was a weird one, but it’s a weird time in the company. It’s like they’re trying to change things up a little bit and see what else they can do, which is certainly a welcome move after all the weeks and months of repetitive material. There are new characters and stories, but they’re not particularly good character or stories so far.

Maven being there because of the Tough Enough show being on is I guess supposed to serve as proof that the winners go somewhere, but that’s not exactly helping the fans. I’ll take the new stuff over more of the old though, so we’ll call this an improvement without much of a shelf life.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Evolution 2018 Preview

It’s almost hard to believe that we’re here. Over the years, women’s wrestling has been up and down (ok mostly down) in WWE with a long history of treating the women as sideshow attractions who were lucky to get three minutes a week. Things have gotten a little better over the last few years though, and now we’re coming up on a full women’s pay per view. There’s a lot of good stuff on the show, and that makes for an interesting card. Let’s get to it.

Bayley/Sasha Banks/Natalya vs. Riott Squad

I’m not sure what it says that Banks and Bayley could only make it onto this show by continuing their eternal feud with the Riott Squad. It isn’t so much that the feud has been bad but it’s gone on for so many months with nothing changing that you wonder what the point is in having it continue. Oh and now Natalya is there, because that’s the spark of life that an already dead feud needs.

I’ll take the Squad here, as the division is going to need some strong names built up to challenge the champ going forward. Ruby Riott may not be the biggest star in the world but she’s someone who could be built up for a Royal Rumble title shot and that’s more than you could say for most of the women here. Maybe Banks, but really this should be about getting the Squad some momentum back so the leader can look stronger in the future.

Mae Young Classic Finals: Toni Storm vs. Io Shirai

This is one that I keep going back and forth on as you really could pick either side and have a strong case. Shirai was the big signing of this year’s tournament and the kind of star that doesn’t come around all that often. At the same time though, Storm is the kind of person that doesn’t come around very often and could be the focal point of the division for a very, very long time. There’s no bad way to go there.

I’ll go with Storm though, as Shirai doesn’t need any kind of a win to come off like the huge star. Storm came close to winning the tournament last year and another loss in the clutch would hurt her. She’s also likely to be a big part of the NXT UK division and having her start off with a big win to help establish the women’s division over there would be a good idea. You could go either way here, but I’ll take Storm as she needs the win a little more.

NXT Women’s Title: Kairi Sane(c) vs. Shayna Baszler

If I was confused by the previous one, I’m downright not sure here. These two have been feuding since last year’s Mae Young Classic and that’s the kind of feud that could be blown off here. Sane is definitely growing into a top star and someone that could be a featured piece of the division for a long time but Baszler is awesome in her own right and it wouldn’t shock me to see her get the title back.

That being said, I think Sane retains here because Baszler is ready to move up to the main roster. As mentioned earlier, they’re going to need some challengers for the Raw Women’s Title and who better to challenge Ronda Rousey than a fellow former UFC fighter? Sane can move on and face one of the half dozen challengers that exist down in NXT, with Bianca Belair near the top of the list. Sane retains here, mainly because there’s nothing left for Baszler down in NXT.

Battle Royal

This is a case where it’s hard to say for sure who is going to win because there’s a good chance of a bunch of surprise entrants. The lineup is pretty awful for the most part as several of the legends are likely to have quick cameos before leaving, such as Torrie Wilson who has no business in a match like this (or a match at all) in the first place. Then you have the names who are actual realistic winners….all four of them or so.

I’ll go with Asuka winning here, which is probably more false hope than anything else. You really just have her, Nia Jax, Ember Moon and Naomi as realistic winners. We’ve been there with Jax for a good chunk of the year, Moon has no momentum, and Naomi has been floating around for months. That being said, the same was true of Naomi going into the WrestleMania battle royal. I’ll take Asuka and kind of hope for the best, as there’s always the chance that someone gets this to set up a one off title match which isn’t exactly interesting.

Trish Stratus/Lita vs. Alicia Fox/Mickie James

Alas, this one took a big hit when Alexa Bliss was held out due to what seems to be a concussion. The whole story was build on Bliss being a jerk to the legends and now there’s nothing for her to do other than stand around at ringside. Fox is the logical replacement but egads what a downgrade that sucks the life out of the match. James vs. Stratus would have been better in this spot, but I get why they went with the tag route instead.

Of course I’m going with the legends as there’s no reason to go with Fox and James. The whole point of this is to showcase Stratus and Lita and there’s nothing wrong with that. Fox can take the pin and we can set up Bliss vs. Stratus down the line. The wrestling isn’t the main focus here and that’s fine. Odds are the legends are going to be a little rusty, but the fans aren’t likely to care in the first place. Just let them have fun and do their thing, which should be fine.

SmackDown Women’s Title: Becky Lynch(c) vs. Charlotte

Last Woman Standing. I’m not sure what to make of this one as the feud has been going on for several months now and this feels like it should be the blowoff, but but I’m not sure it WWE is ready to wrap it up just yet. Lynch has been on a roll and there’s a real argument that this should headline the show, but neither of them are on a reality show and therefore it wouldn’t make sense to feature them on a show that has been purchased no matter what is closing it out.

I’ll go with Lynch retaining here, though I wouldn’t be surprised to see this go to a draw so they can have ONE MORE MATCH, probably at Tables, Ladders And Chairs. In theory Lynch should win here and hold the title for a long time, but WWE loves putting the title on Charlotte. In theory they need to build her back up for a showdown with Rousey at WrestleMania, but that’s what the women’s Royal Rumble is fr. Lynch should win here, but watch out for that draw.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey(c) vs. Nikki Bella

I’ve made no secret of the fact that I don’t want to see this match. I can’t stand the Bella Twins for a variety of reasons, not the least of which being that I get sick of hearing about how they’re legends and made the term Diva mean something, when they’re only legends in WWE’s minds and a few generations before them did more for the term than they could ever hope to. I could go on for another few hours about the two of them but I think you get the idea.

Normally I’d say OF COURSE Rousey retains here, but I’ll settle for she retains in theory, as you never can tell when WWE might decide to push the heck out of the Bellas all over again. There’s no reason this match should go longer than about four minutes but I’m sure the power of the Bellas will be more than enough to balance out the real life female fighter, because the Bellas are known for their martial arts abilities. I mean, Nikki is undefeated against shirts that she tears during her stripper entrance on the way to the ring that has apparently inspired millions of girls (inspired them to do what to be determined).

Overall Thoughts

I wasn’t thrilled with the idea of this show when it was announced and the build up to it hasn’t done me any favors. The matches are mostly just there and the main event makes my head hurt for a variety of reasons. You can also pen in Stephanie McMahon coming out to bless the show or talk about how they all did it together, which is of course code for “I did this and make sure to get my good side for the news piece about it.” The show sounds like a cool idea on paper, but as usual, WWE has taken away a lot of the fun involved and turned it into just another show that may or may not exceed some limited expectations.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – November 24, 2003: The Jacked Up Nimrod Version

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 24, 2003
Location: E Center, Salt Lake City, Utah
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on Thanksgiving but more importantly tonight is a double shot with HHH challenging Goldberg for the Raw World Title and Raw Roulette all night long. It’s a night of Spin the Wheel Make the Deal, which used to be one of my favorite ideas when I was a kid. Now let’s see how WWE can screw it up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

The roulette wheel is in the ring to start, accompanied by Eric Bischoff and a pair of showgirls. Bischoff reiterates that Raw Roulette is taking place because this is such a boring town and explains the concept. We get the first spin for a match to be announced but it’s Shawn Michaels with an interruption instead. Shawn says Bischoff interrupted him last week so this is his way of returning the favor. He’s spent the last week thinking back to Survivor Series and now it’s completely clear: he did the exact right thing. Shawn gave the fight of his life and didn’t cost Austin his job.

Cue Batista to say he cost Austin his job. Shawn wants the “jacked up nimrod” to come fight right now so he comes, only to have Bischoff cut them off. The match is made for Armageddon but tonight, as per the wheel, it’s Bischoff’s Choice. Tonight, we’ll do Batista/Ric Flair vs. Shawn/Chris Jericho.

Lita vs. Victoria

In a cage via a spin from Molly Holly and I believe the first women’s cage match in company history. Lita throws her her into the cage a few times to start and Lawler is panicking over Victoria’s thong being exposed. Victoria gets in her spinning side slam for two but Lita gets in a monkey flip and some right hands. A hurricanrana nearly drops Victoria on her head but she’s able to get in a slam off the top.

Lita goes up again….and falls off with no one touching her. That’s a really bad sign, as is Victoria ramming her into the cage again. A powerbomb pulls Victoria off the cage and there’s the moonsault. Lita goes for the door and here’s Matt Hardy to slam the door on her head to give Victoria the easy win.

Rating: D-. That fall off the cage looked so bad and there was no saving this thing. There was little drama and with only four minutes, you can’t get much done in there. It’s not a good match and there’s no real build to it, which is what’s going to cause problems with the show all night long.

Post match Matt goes after Lita but Christian runs in for the save.

Bischoff’s showgirls are huddled around Randy Orton, who promises to win the Intercontinental Title at Armageddon. He has a match tonight too and Bischoff has already spun the wheel for him (erg), setting up a Legend Killer match. Orton leaves and here are Hurricane and Rosey, who have a match tonight as well. They’ll be having a midget catching match and here’s a midget named Fernando, who runs off. Bischoff actually explains the match and Hurricane isn’t sure, so Bischoff says if they refuse, the loser gets fired. Hurricane: “I see. Rosey, wait here.” The chase is on.

Sgt. Slaughter vs. Randy Orton

Slaughter grabs a quickly broken Cobra Clutch as the fans chant USA. You know, in opposition to that foreigner from the far off city of St. Louis. Orton forearms him down and pounds away, setting up a sleeper. That’s reversed into a camel clutch which Slaughter reverses into another Cobra Clutch. Orton makes the rope and kicks him low, setting up the RKO for the pin. This was a thing that happened.

Post match Orton stomps away until Rob Van Dam makes the save.

Video on Goldberg vs. HHH from Survivor Series and the handicap match from last week.

Val Venis and Lance Storm are waiting for some women to arrive. These are a little more conservative than usual so they have to prove that they’re nicer guys. The ladies, looking pretty much the same as most of Venis’ women, show up and are ready to go out but are worried about wrestlers being too crazy. Cue Hurricane and Rosey, the former with a net, chasing Fernando. Storm: “They’re not with us.”

Ric Flair and Coach plug the Ultimate Ric Flair DVD set (Amen brother. That thing was awesome.) with Flair promising to take care of Shawn tonight.

Matt Hardy is ready to spin the wheel but first, insists that he’s slammed the door on Lita for good. Hang on though, as Bischoff has to gloat about firing Austin, though he does plug Austin’s upcoming UPN special. It’s a Strange Bedfellows match (Matt: “WHOA WHOA WHOA! Version 1 is straight!”), meaning a tag match with first time ever partners.

Lillian starts introducing the next match but hang on because we need to see Goldberg spearing HHH in video game form.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Garrison Cade vs. Matt Hardy/Christian

Rating: D. Angle instead of a match and that’s fine enough. Cade and Mark Jindrak have nothing going for them so giving the team a few wins isn’t the worst idea in the world. The gimmick allowed that to happen and it’s not quite as big of a deal as a cage match so this isn’t as annoying. Nothing match of course.

JR is aghast at Matt walking out on this nothing tag match. He wasn’t this annoyed at SLAMMING A METAL DOOR ON HER HEAD EARLIER. Cade hands Bubba the title but doesn’t let it go. Bubba yells a bit and Cade sneers as he leaves.

Shawn Michaels promises to beat the odds again tonight. He goes to leave but stops to point out the midget looking up Terri’s dress. A chase ensues.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Goldberg

HHH is challenging. They talk trash to start until a Flair distraction lets HHH deck him from behind. That earns HHH a hard clothesline and the fight heads outside with Goldberg’s ankle seeming fine so far. Goldberg gets sent hard into the steps and it’s time to start working over the shoulder. You know, instead of the ankle that was broken about a month ago.

A knee drop rocks Goldberg again but he’s still able to slam HHH off the top. For some reason Goldberg thinks ducking your head against HHH is a good idea and that means a facebuster. The gorilla press powerslam drops HHH again but Flair grabs the foot. Cue Orton to grab Goldberg, which should be a DQ, but seems to be nothing as HHH hits the Pedigree to draw out Kane. That just earns him a spear so Kane comes in and attacks Goldberg to FINALLY draw the DQ. I’m not sure if that was a missed spot or really bad officiating but it looked terrible more than once.

Rating: D+. The ending destroys any good stuff this could have been but the bigger problem is how these two just don’t work well together. They haven’t had a good match yet and this feud has been going on since before Summerslam. HHH works too much of a power style to make this work and it’s not getting better every time they fight. We’ll be getting it again too and that’s really annoying to hear, but it’s what HHH wants so who are we to complain?

Post break HHH and Kane storm into Bischoff’s office so a triple threat is made for Armageddon.

Fernando runs through the parking lot.

Booker T. vs. Mark Henry

Rating: D+. There’s something to be said about Henry wrecking the weapons and doing the scary power stuff. It’s not a good match of course but I was entertained and that’s as good as you can get here. The problem is it’s also bad booking as you don’t want Henry and Booker T. trading wins in short matches. That philosophy doesn’t work, no matter how much WWE likes to think it does.

Trish Stratus gets a bra and panties match but doesn’t seem to mind. She leaves and runs into Chris Jericho, who offers to use his Bischoff favor to get her out of it. Trish: “I’ve got this.” Jericho: “I know you’ve got it but I can go talk to him.” Trish talks about the Shawn tag match and Trish wants him to be the man that she knows he is. Maybe if he’s good with Shawn tonight, she’ll be good with him tonight. That gets Jericho’s attention.

JR plugs the Austin special. As he and Lawler are talking, Fernando runs up and sits on JR’s lap, making him the winner. JR puts his hat on Fernando, who has a mustache, and calls him a little fella.

Rob Van Dam vs. Scott Steiner/Test

The wheel comes up with a handicap match but Orton convinces Bischoff to spin it again for a bonus stipulation, which is a Singapore cane match. Rob knocks Steiner off the apron and dives onto Test, followed by a whip to send Steiner into the steps. Scott gets kicked down but Test scores with a cane shot to break up Rolling Thunder. A clothesline with the cane gets two but Rob is right back with the kicks. Rob canes Steiner by mistake and the Five Star hits Scott. Test’s second shot to the head puts Rob down for the pin.

Jericho tries to get Trish out of the match but Bischoff thinks he’s falling for her.

Jackie Gayda vs. Trish Stratus

Bra and panties of course. Jackie jumps her to start but gets her top pulled off early on. Trish gets put in the Tree of Woe and loses her top as well. Rico gets pulled in and loses his pants, which he seems to like. Jackie kicks Rico down by mistake and Trish takes her down for the win.

Post match Jackie freaks out and rips off Lillian Garcia’s jacket.

Trish tells Jericho that their evening activities depends on what he does. That’s quite the offer.

Chris Jericho/Shawn Michaels vs. Batista/Ric Flair

The arena is full of smoke from Shawn’s pyro. Shawn chops at Flair to start and Jericho comes in off the tag with no issues. A missile dropkick gets two on Flair and a few chops set up the Flair Flop. Batista comes in and spinebusts the heck out of Jericho. It’s back to Flair who goes up top and you know what’s next.

The tag brings Shawn back in as they’re certainly running through this one in a hurry. Batista gets knocked off the apron, leaving Shawn and Flair to punch it out. A poke to the eye blinds Shawn and he punches Jericho by mistake, followed by the superkick to Flair. Jericho superkicks Shawn, who falls onto Flair for the pin.

Rating: D. These four should be able to do better than this by definition. The time was killing them again though as there’s not much you can do with so little time and an angle involved in the finish. Shawn vs. Batista could be good with Shawn knowing how to handle someone like him, but the Jericho addition is a little odd.

Jericho bolts to the back as Shawn isn’t sure what happened. Batista and Flair lay Shawn out with Shawn bleeding from the mouth to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. I didn’t hate the show but there wasn’t much to see on there. The Raw Roulette thing helped a bit but having the chase scenes all night with JR as the payoff is a little beneath what I was hoping for. They set some stuff up for Armageddon though and that’s what helps most. However, when one of those things is ANOTHER Goldberg vs. HHH match, there’s only so much positive to be gathered. That story needs to change soon because it’s been out of steam for months now. There’s not much good to be found here, but I’ll take a gimmick show like this over a regular boring night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – November 17, 2003: Save For HHH Of Course

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: November 17, 2003
Location: SE Texas Arena, Beaumont, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re past Survivor Series and that means we’re on the way to Armageddon to end the year. Eric Bischoff is back in full control of the show as Steve Austin’s team lost last night. I’m sure we’ll NEVER see him again. Goldberg is still the Raw World Champion too, having dispatched Evolution on a bad ankle. Why do I have a feeling that the HHH feud is far from over though? Let’s get to it.

Here’s Survivor Series if you need a recap.

Austin’s face comes up at the end of the opening and Bischoff spray paints it out. Not bad for a chuckle.

We hear Austin’s post match speech from last night, complete with photos and clips of his career, all the way back to 1989. The shot closes on the two beer cans Austin left in the ring.

In the arena, Bischoff and his team from last night look down on the same beer cans, which Eric stomps on. Those who have supported him are in for some good times but for those against him, it’s the beginning of the end. Each member of his team gets a special favor, good for anything anytime (within reason).

Cue the rest of Evolution with HHH congratulating Bischoff on his victory last night. The thing is though, it was Evolution that gave Bischoff the win. Without them, Austin would still be in charge. Bischoff agrees, so HHH can have a rematch with Goldberg any time. In a bizarre line, HHH says that’s “very white” of Bischoff (HHH to Long and Henry: “No offense guys.”). HHH blames the sledgehammer for the loss and instead of a title match tonight, we’ll have a 3-1 handicap match with Goldberg facing Evolution minus Flair. Bischoff says that’s the bottom line.

Booker T. vs. Mark Henry

Booker wastes no time in hammering away but some hard forearms knock him backwards in a hurry. A kick to the chest rocks Henry but one heck of a clothesline takes care of that. They’re already doing things right with Henry here: have Henry stand in the middle while the more talented guy does his thing and bounces off of Henry. A sleeper brings Henry down to a knee until he powers Booker into the corner. Booker gets run over for good measure and Henry stands on his chest. Again: using the power game in simple, effective way is what serves Henry best.

We hit the neck crank for a bit until Henry misses a charge in the corner. Booker kicks away and the ax kick FINALLY puts Henry down. The missile dropkick does it again but Henry counters a third kick into a powerslam for two. Henry tries another charge into the corner, only to get rolled up with Booker putting his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not too shabby at all here with Booker knowing how to get the best out of Henry. I know he gets a lot of flack and a lot of it is deserved but Henry has a role that few can play. Let him do his thing like this (maybe winning a match here or there) and it might get him somewhere. That’s a good asset to have when you need to give someone a rub down the line.

La Resistance vs. Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade

There’s no graphic behind Cade and Jindrak’s names for some reason. The Americans clean house to start and for some reason, Cade is allowed to talk. He brings up his fellow Texans and dedicates the match to the armed forces (well to be fair it’s been like a week). Those are fighting words so we’re ready to go.

Back in and Conway scores with a hurricanrana as JR recaps the night. We’re not even half an hour into the show so it’s a bit early for a recap. A throat snap across the top rope gives Conway two on Jindrak but he suplexes Dupree out of the corner. Cade comes in to clean house and a very hard clothesline gets two on Dupree. The dropkick/spinebuster combination puts Conway away. The match was barely long enough to rate and the promo was after the bell. Not much to this one of course, but at least the rookies got a clean win for a change.

Shawn Michaels has something to say about the loss last night but Bischoff cuts the interview. Shawn talks about everything that went down last night and said it was about doing the right thing. All Bischoff cares about is the power but Bischoff says he didn’t lose last night like Michaels did. For tonight, Shawn is ejected from the building.

Stills of the ambulance match, which again made Shane look like a bigger star than most of the roster.

Kane will be on Smackdown to eulogize the Dudleys.

Scott Steiner has used his favor to get himself and Test a Tag Team Title shot. In exchange, he’s no longer Test’s property. Test agrees but makes it clear that Stacy is still his property and will do what he wants.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Ric Flair

Flair is challenging, Orton is on commentary and as per Bischoff’s orders, the Five Star is banned. They pose at each other to start until Rob kicks him down and gets two off a standing moonsault. A spinning legdrop sends Flair bailing and it’s time for a slugout on the floor with Rob getting the better of it.

JR complains about the Five Star being banned, saying it would be like banning the RKO. Orton warns them to watch it because he seems them as a legendary announce team. Lawler gets the threat and says JR is a legend but says nothing about himself. As expected, it seems to go sailing over JR’s head. Flair sends him knee first into the steps to take over but the knee is fine enough for a spinwheel kick.

The Figure Four goes on until Rob turns it over so there’s a chop block for even worse measure. Rob pops back up with a middle rope spinning crossbody and superkicks Flair down. That’s enough to bring Orton to ringside but Rob kicks him down as well. Ric’s low blow only gets two and Rob loads up the Five Star, drawing in Orton for an RKO off the top and the DQ.

Rating: C. They were getting going here and that’s a good sign for when Orton takes the title from Van Dam. This seemed to exist for the sake of making Orton the next challenger and that’s the right call. Orton needs something like that to establish himself more as for now, he’s just a bunch of potential without a big win.

Orton puts the title on and drops it on Rob.

Coach makes fun of Hurricane and Rosey before going into Bischoff’s office. Eric has a big surprise for next week: Raw Roulette! In Salt Lake City, Utah! Bischoff is holding it there because the city is boring and they need something to make the show interesting.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel with Jericho saying it’s not his fault that Austin was in over his head. Jericho wasn’t the sole survivor last night but he was the one who got the match off the ground in the first place. So he deserves a H*** YEAH for helping get rid of Austin! That brings him to his guest this week: Lita. She doesn’t seem happy to be here and doesn’t want to hear anything about Jericho or especially Christian.

Instead here’s Matt Hardy to return to Raw, drawing a big smile from Lita. Matt quickly kisses her and has a question that he has to ask from one knee. Before it can be asked though, here’s Molly Holly to interrupt. She has a question of her own: what does she have to do to get some respect around here? She’s the Women’s Champion and beat Lita at Survivor Series but who is out here getting the attention? Jericho likes the animosity and thinks we should have a mixed tag tonight. Molly agrees, but with Bischoff as her partner. Matt and Lita don’t know what to think.

Post break Bischoff asks what Molly is thinking. She thought this could be the beginning of the end for Lita, so Bischoff adds some stipulations: if they win, Lita is fired for good. If Matt and Lita win, Lita gets a rematch for the Women’s Title.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. Scott Steiner/Test

Steiner/Test are challenging. The fans want tables but have to wait through D-Von and Test starting things off. Lawler: “They don’t have tables here in Beaumont, Texas? Do they eat off the floor?” Test powers him around to start but walks into a jumping elbow to the jaw. Steiner comes in and gets punched in the head for his efforts, before it’s off to Bubba in his hardcore shorts.

Stacy cheers as Bubba hits a side slam but then sits back down in her chair so Test can yell at her some more. We actually hear about the Duchess of Dudleyville, with Lawler bringing up the history. I’m as confused as you are. It’s back to Test for a running clothesline in the corner, followed by jumping jacks for a little exercise. You have to get it in when you can.

We hit the chinlock and Stacy slaps the mat to get Bubba back to his feet. That means a Bubba Bomb for a break and the hot tag brings in D-Von to clean house. Everything breaks down and a thumb to the eye looks to set up Test’s pumphandle slam. That’s escaped as well and What’s Up Test. He’s right back up (make your own joke) with a full nelson slam to D-Von but now he wants Stacy to throw him a belt. She says no, and that means a 3D to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. Actually a good match here with both teams getting to look good out there. Test and Steiner are fine for a power team and I would have tolerated them a lot more over the last several months had they just done this rather than the whole feud and owning Stacy thing. They need another few teams but the tag division is starting to put some pieces together for a change.

Matt and Lita are in the back with Matt saying he wanted their first kiss to be in front of the world. Haven’t they done that already? Anyway, now it’s about getting her a shot at the Women’s Title. Matt leaves and Trish comes in for the rapid fire giggling.

Lita/Matt Hardy vs. Molly Holly/Eric Bischoff

They all get jobber entrances for some reason and genders can mix. Lita throws Molly down to start as the announcers point out Bischoff wrestling in a suit. That’s rather nice for a change as there’s no reason for him to have gear ready. Molly pulls Lita into the corner for two and we hit the chinlock. A Reverse DDT gets Lita out of trouble as Jerry keeps talking about the suit. Eric comes in and gets slapped, allowing Matt to….drop to the floor instead of coming in. Bischoff pulls Lita down by the hair and gets a really bad rollup (there’s no way I’m buying Lita couldn’t kick out of that) for the pin.

Post match Matt says he was going to ask Lita how she could be so selfish. All she had to do was come join him on Smackdown but instead she had to come back to Raw for the Women’s Title. She couldn’t even do that right though and it’s clear that the title and her career mean more than him and their relationship. They are THROUGH and Matt walks out. And that’s the end of any drama between them for the rest of time.

Val Venis vs. Rico

Venis has the women and Lance Storm to counter Miss Jackie. An early shoulder puts Rico down as the announcers start talking about Matt and Lita as this is pretty clearly just background noise for their chatter. Rico escapes a suplex and grabs a Backstabber to take over as the announcers talk about the ratings.

We get back to the match with Rico hitting a knee lift and a discussion about which section of the closet Rico is in/coming out of/was in. Rico drops an elbow and gyrates the hips as the discussion moves to JR being put on the Roulette wheel next week. This is reaching WCW levels of ignoring the match.

Rico grabs the chinlock as Jerry thinks JR could be in an inferno match and JR reacts accordingly. Val fights up and hits some clotheslines as JR says Rico wouldn’t fit in down in Muskogee. A Blue Thunder Bomb gets two and Val’s big boot gets the same. The Money Shot is loaded up but Val has to kick Jackie to the floor (in a big crash). She gets up to look at Storm, which isn’t noteworthy on its own but does include probably the longest nip slip in WWE history (edited but still visible on the Network). Rico gets shoved down as well and now the Money Shot is good for the pin. Storm wasn’t a factor.

Rating: D+. The wrestling wasn’t the worst (though it could have been about three minutes shorter) but the commentary here was what got the most focus. It was clear that the match was just there because they didn’t have anything else to do and I feel sorry for the wrestlers then. It’s nice to have them get out there and get to show off what they can do (in a watchable enough match) but egads can the announcers pretend that it matters?

Post match, Val and Storm dance with the ladies.

Lita (with her dog in her purse, which always looks dumb) is leaving when she runs into Christian. He has good news for her: he used his Bischoff favor to get her job back. Christian even picks up her bag and offers a shoulder to cry on, which she accepts.

Same Austin video as the opener.

We look at Orton RKOing Mark Cuban. Why that wasn’t a dark segment eludes me.

Orton has cashed in his favor for an Intercontinental Title shot at the next (unnamed) pay per view. He lists off some great Intercontinental Champions, forgetting HHH until the boss points it out. That’s fine enough because all that matters to HHH is getting the pin tonight in the handicap match.

Jericho asks Trish out for another date but she turns him down for being in on the Matt/Lita shenanigans. He denies all involvement and somehow offers up enough charm to get a kiss out of the whole thing.

Evolution vs. Goldberg

Orton starts for the team but his partners are quickly knocked to the floor with Randy being tossed on top of them. It’s off to Batista for the big power showdown but Goldberg knocks him down with one shot, followed by a powerslam for two. The ankle seems fine so far. HHH comes in and gets hammered in the face and suplexed.

Flair breaks up the spear though and HHH’s jumping knee to the face takes over. Orton’s dropkick rocks Goldberg but he spears the heck out of HHH. Batista and Orton get clotheslined down, only to have HHH come back with the facebuster. There’s the RKO (JR: “You gotta get up Billy.”) and a Batista Bomb, followed by the Pedigree to end Goldberg.

Rating: D. So to the shock of no one, last night’s win over HHH means nothing because we’re still waiting on him to get his title back from Goldberg. The normal question would be “well if that match didn’t count, why should I watch the next pay per view?” but that’s answered because everything gets important as soon as HHH gets the title back. This was all about rebuilding HHH, because Heaven forbid we go a DAY without him getting the upper hand on Goldberg.

Post match HHH says he’s cashing in his rematch next week. Tonight isn’t over though and he wraps a chair around Goldberg’s neck, drawing out Kane for the unlikely save. A sloppy chokeslam plants Goldberg to end the show instead.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling wasn’t the worst here but the important thing was the storytelling. HHH aside, this show moved a lot of the stories in new and/or positive directions. Trish/Lita/Jericho/Christian in particular is really shaping up and there are several ways they could go with it. Throw in a lot of people having issues with Bischoff and the need for some fresh names to rise up and fight him and I’m actually interested in where some of this stuff goes. Better show than recent weeks, and I’m curious to see where a lot of it goes.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of the WWE Grab Bag (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/03/23/new-paperback-kbs-grab-bag/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – October 27, 2003: Double Shot in Short Order

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 27, 2003
Location: Crown Coliseum, Fayetteville, North Carolina
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Evolution is back to full strength and Goldberg is down to one ankle after last week. Batista made his return from a long injury layoff to collect the bounty on Goldberg. That sets HHH up very well as we head towards Survivor Series, though we don’t have much set up for the show just yet. Let’s get to it.

Here’s last week show if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the bounty being cashed in last week. Batista’s return went as well as it could have and makes him look like a killer in the process. This is set to what used to be Rey Mysterio’s WCW music, which must be public domain as it pops up every so often.

Opening sequence.

There’s a cage above the ring. Lawler: “Why is the cage here?” Maybe because there’s a cage match scheduled?

Here’s Evolution minus HHH and of course the fans are very happy to see Ric Flair. We get right to the point (how nice for a change) with Flair saying Goldberg won’t be here tonight. The fans seem rather indifferent, or at worst happy with the news. Batista was the man who did that and says that Goldberg shouldn’t see that as a negative. Instead he should think of it as an honor because HHH was impressed enough to want him taken out.

Batista is that much better than Goldberg and it was him who had all those near misses over the last few weeks. Orton wants to know who the champion is now because Goldberg is DONE. In all fairness it should go back to HHH but here’s Eric Bischoff instead, carrying a bag. Bischoff rants about losing Goldberg, the man he depends on to defend the title around the world. Do you know what losing him does to Bischoff? It makes him the happiest man on the planet.

Flair is livid, despite what should be the biggest layup in the world. Austin: “Settle down before you blow your pacemaker.” That’s the bottom line and Austin goes to leave but Batista says hang on a second. That kind of disrespect sounds like Austin is looking for physical provocation. A fight is teased but here are Mark Jindrak and Garrison Cade (because WWE doesn’t learn lessons) to attack Orton and Flair.

Trish Stratus and Lita, in their underwear for obvious reasons, talk about Chris Jericho and Christian’s recent changes of heart. Lita is going to go see what she can find out.

Booker T. vs. Rico

Miss Jackie grabs Booker’s foot to start and Rico fires off the kicks to start. A chinlock goes nowhere as Jerry wants Rico to go back in the closet. The ax kick misses, Rico’s big kick misses and the ax kick finishes Rico in short order.

Post match here’s Jericho to yell at Booker for being on the wrong team at Survivor Series. He brings out the rest of Team Bischoff, now including Christian and Scott Steiner. Jericho wants the cage lowered and the big beatdown is on. Rob Van Dam comes in for the save and declares himself the newest member of Team Austin. That match is really starting to take shape.

Post break Jericho is yelling at Bischoff over Van Dam interfering. Jericho’s solution? Let him win the Intercontinental Title tonight. Bischoff agrees.

Mark Henry vs. Lance Storm

Teddy Long and Henry aren’t happy at losing the $100,000 last week and it’s time to get some payback. Henry throws him around for a few moments until Shawn Michaels runs in and superkicks Henry for the DQ. So much for Storm’s push.

Heidenreich is ready to team with Hurricane in his tag match. Hurricane mentions Little Johnny but he couldn’t be here tonight. Rosey comes up to take a picture of them and Hurricane mentions Johnny being Heidenreich’s son. Actually that’s not right and Heidenreich whispers the real story in Hurricane’s ear. The jaw drops and Rosey takes the picture, leaving Hurricane to say “and people say I’M weird for wearing a cape?”

Lita goes up to Christian in the back and wants to know what happened last week. Christian was reading her book and there’s a picture of the two of them holding hands. Apparently there was a bit of history but Lita acts like it’s nothing now. She leaves for her match, a bit flustered.

Shane McMahon has a match with a mystery opponent tonight and hopes it’s Kane.

Hurricane/Heidenreich vs. La Resistance

Conway jumps Hurricane as he tries to give his mask away but something like a backslide into the Eye of the Hurricane puts Conway down instead. Hurricane isn’t done and hits a big flip dive over the top to take Dupree down as well. Back in and Conway scores with a hanging swinging neckbreaker to really take over as Heidenreich tries to come in for the save.

We hit the USA chants (from the Army, Air Force and Marines members in the crowd) until a clothesline cuts Hurricane down for two more. It’s off to the chinlock as the announcers start with the FRANCE SUCKS jokes. A neckbreaker gets Hurricane out of trouble and it’s Heidenreich coming in to clean house. Conway eats a bicycle kick for two and a Rock Bottom is enough to put him away.

Rating: D+. Fairly boring here but good grief I’m sick of the RAH RAH RAH USA USA USA matches. I know Vince loves that kind of stuff but it’s getting a little hard to take. If nothing else, have someone better than La Resistance as the evil anti-Americans. They’ve lost most of their last few matches and it’s getting harder and harder to care.

Post match Heidenreich breaks up an attempt to wave the French flag.

Shane McMahon vs. ???

No DQ and the mystery opponent is…..Test? Well maybe not as he has a broken foot and is on crutches while wearing street clothes. He’s here to introduce the mystery opponent tonight and it’s….Test. Uh, ok then. Shane peppers him with left hands and stomps on the bad foot, sending Test to the floor to call for backup.

Shane goes up top and loads up a dive but Test pulls Stacy in front of him. With Test shouting for Kane (by name), Shane hammers away until Test sends him into the steps. But now, let’s wait for Test to shout for Kane again. A full nelson slam plants Shane but rather than covering, TEST SHOUTS FOR KANE.

It’s weapons time with Test in control until Stacy slows him down. The distraction lets Shane get in a few shots and load up the Van Terminator. Kane’s pyro goes off and Test gets in a crutch shot for two. The pumphandle slam is countered into a DDT onto the trashcan for two more and they’re both rocked. Shane chairs him into the corner and now the Van Terminator connects for the pin.

Rating: D. Let me make sure I’ve got this straight: we spent months on Test vs. Steiner and the next step is Test getting to job to Shane on Raw? I still have no idea why this needs to be Shane when he could be any given wrestler. He’s better than Stephanie due to the more logical motivation and having better matches but still, this could be anyone else who needs the spotlight.

Post match Shane accuses Kane of being scared. He should be scared, but he should be showing his face. If Kane won’t come out, he’ll offer a demonstration. That means beating Test up even more and crushing his foot on the steps with a chair. This brings Kane to the stage but no further. Shane announces that Survivor Series will be an ambulance match, which is even dumber than what they’ve been doing so far.

Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Gail Kim vs. Victoria

#1 contenders match. Lita knees Victoria in the corner and Trish gets two off a spinebuster. Molly, in jeans, a leather jacket and a low cut top (by her standards) is watching from the stage. That’s a rather nice look for her. Trish’s rollup gets two on Victoria and takes her down with a headscissors out of the corner.

Stevie Richards takes Trish down though and Lita gets double teamed. A powerbomb gets two on Gail and the Widow’s Peak gets the same on Lita. Victoria and Gail get in a fight with Kim being sent outside, leaving Lita to grab a DDT for the pin. Too short to rate, but it’s as rushed as you would imagine a four way that doesn’t even last three minutes to be.

Coach is getting his makeup done while reading Austin’s new book.

Video on Hawk.

Here’s Coach to review the book. He even has a podium with The Coach’s Book Review on a sign. Coach calls most of the statements in the book lies, focusing on Bischoff firing Austin from WCW. Cue Austin to offer Coach a free shot but Coach offers him the same thing. Austin has to decline but after his team wins at Survivor Series, he’d like Coach to do the post match interview because it’s the first face Austin wants to see.

Jindrak and Cade are ready to win so here’s Shawn to give them a pep talk. They go off for their match when Teddy comes in to yell about Shawn superkicking Henry. Teddy wants Henry vs. the “Heart Break Cracker” next week. Shawn says he could have cut off the rhetoric “you feel me playa?” Teddy: “Holla.” Teddy leaves so here’s Bischoff to have security escort Shawn from the arena.

JR and King thank the fans for their viewership as Raw was the highest rated cable show of the week.

Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade vs. Ric Flair/Randy Orton

Orton and Jindrak start things off but hang on a second as MAVEN, the definition of inspiration, is here to cancel out Batista. Make your own jokes, but that speaks for itself. Cade comes in and gets stomped down before it’s off to Flair (in red, meaning he’s likely losing) for an elbow to the jaw. Orton’s dropkick gets two but a double clothesline allows the hot tag to Jindrak.

Some very nice dropkicks have Evolution in trouble but Flair rolls Jindrak up. The referee is busy though so Maven comes in, runs at Flair with his arm extended, BARELY grazes Ric’s hair, and somehow turns the rollup over to give Jindrak the pin. I had to rewind the video a few times to see how Maven could have possibly missed that. Flair didn’t duck, so yes, Maven managed to miss a still target on a running clothesline.

Rating: D. The ending is absolutely the right call (though Maven needs target practice) as the young guys getting a pin is a good thing. However, they’re just so boring and uninteresting that their win is only going to get them so far. Give them a team name (or better names in general) or some matching gear or a gimmick of some sort. Just do SOMETHING because they’re putting me to sleep.

Evolution wrecks the boring guys post match. Batista looks very good dominating people here.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

Rob is defending and wastes no time with a spinning crossbody out of the corner. Jericho blocks a charge with a raised boot and a jumping enziguri gets two. They’re not exactly wasting any time here. We hit the double arm crank on the champ but Rob is quickly out and avoiding a charge into the post to send Jericho’s shoulder into the steel. Back up and the Five Star misses so Jericho can sneak in a low blow. The Walls go on but here’s Bischoff to distract the referee. As you might expect, Van Dam’s rope grab isn’t seen and Jericho pulls him back to the middle of the ring for the tap.

Rating: C-. It was fun while it lasted but it didn’t last long at all. I know Van Dam was in the ropes but he’s tapping out in less than five minutes? That’s quite the stretch and while I can buy it, you know this is going to be setting up a rematch and that’s not the worst thing in the world. These two work well enough together that I’d like to see them go at it again.

Hang on a second as Austin comes out and makes the rematch RIGHT NOW….inside of that steel cage. Bischoff runs up the ramp to yell at Austin but trips into him by mistake, meaning the chase is on.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho is defending inside a cage. Joined in progress with Rob in trouble thanks to the weakened back. A missed dropkick makes things even worse and Jericho drops an elbow for good measure. It’s off to the backbreaker with Jericho bending the back over his knee (thank goodness for mixing up the holds) as the back is banged up even worse.

Rob sends him into the cage a few times for his first offense but it’s too early to go over the top. Instead Jericho pulls him down and slams him off the top. This time it’s Jericho going up but Rob pulls him back down and they fall down to the mat in a double heap. Rob pulls him in again and superkicks him off the ropes before going over the top. Jericho goes for the door but Rob kicks it into his head and wins the title back.

Rating: D+. Well ok then. I guess the idea here is to show the power struggle between Bischoff and Austin, just in case the last four months didn’t explain that in enough detail. The match was, again, too short to mean anything but at least they both get a second reign out of the thing. That Jericho reign is probably shorter than Dean Douglas’ though, so at least we got some history out of the thing.

Post match Christian and Steiner come in to destroy Van Dam. Cue the Dudleys through the crowd to even things up but Mark Henry comes in as well. Teddy locks the cage as the beating is on so here’s Booker T. to dive off the top of the cage. Henry shrugs it off and hits a bunch of World’s Strongest Slams to end the show. They certainly added to that match in a hurry.

Overall Rating: D. This is a give and take show. While there’s nothing good in the way of wrestling, there is a clear plan for where most (if not all) of these stories are going. You can see a lot of Survivor Series from here and that’s a major upgrade over the meandering stories that basically came down to “how can we make HHH look good”. While not a good show, it’s actually a positive sign for the future and that’s not something you get too often on Raw.

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