Monday Night Raw
Date: September 30, 2002
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’ll wrap the month up here with less than three weeks to go before No Mercy, which hasn’t even been addressed yet. All I know is we’re going to be seeing a lot more of Ric Flair and HHH because HHH is in charge and wants Flair to feel special again or something like that. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Eric Bischoff in the ring to tell us to not bother going over to Monday Night Football. Tonight there are going to be three title matches with Trish Stratus, Chris Jericho and HHH all putting their titles on the line. Good idea but I’m scared about who might be challenging. As for No Mercy, it’s going to be title vs. title at No Mercy because we’re going to have one show and one champion.

That brings him to Lita, who has been standing behind him. Apparently Lita recently said Smackdown was better than Raw and it wasn’t because of having better talent. Eric calls her a rather rude word and says that Lita is worthless after breaking her neck in Hollywood. Lita says that’s her opinion so she has three minutes to get out. Cue Jeff Hardy, Booker T. and Goldust for the save and that means it’s time for a match.

3 Minute Warning vs. Goldust/Booker T.

Booker gets knocked to the floor to start but comes right back in to break up some double teaming. We settle down to Jamal hammering on Goldust as the fans rip on Rico. Rosey drops a spinning legdrop for two and it’s time to continue the beating. Thankfully the fans switch over to a Goldust chant and he grabs a neckbreaker to put Rosey down.

That’s enough for the hot tag off to Booker as house is quickly cleaned. The side kick sets up the Spinarooni but the ax kick only gets two. Rico gets in a kick to drop Goldust, leaving Booker to clothesline the monsters. A World’s Strongest Slam puts him down though and Jamal’s top rope splash is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to the match here but it’s not a good sign when Booker, as in the hometown favorite, gets to lose AGAIN. Booker has been one of the hottest acts on Raw for months now and I have no idea why he and Goldust keep losing so much. They should have been the Tag Team Champions a month ago with Booker moving up the ladder in a hurry. To be fair though, at least they’re pushing SOMEONE fresh and that’s a lot better than you can say most of the time.

Rico is ready to take 3 Minute Warning to the Tag Team Titles.

Christian and Lance Storm argue over last week’s title loss but William Regal wants them to concentrate on Storm’s match with Randy Orton.

Chris Jericho says Kane’s chances of becoming Intercontinental Champion are as real as Terri’s chest. Ace reporter Gregory Helms comes in to say his sources have told him that Jericho has no chance. Jericho: “Has everybody in this company gone completely insane?” Chris goes on a rant against freaks when Kane comes in to scare him away. After Kane kissed her last week, Terri kisses Kane and leaves. Kane: “Chicks dig the mask.”

Randy Orton vs. Lance Storm

Orton starts fast with his backbreaker as the announcers talk about Saddam Hussein. That’s about it for the early offense though as Storm takes him into the corner for some yelling and choking. It’s off to an armbar with Orton slapping the mat to no avail. Storm tries an O’Connor Roll with trunks but Orton rolls through into one of his own and grabs the tights for a sloppy pin.

We’re not done yet though as Christian steals Jim Ross’ hat and says Storm dropped the ball again. That means a challenge.

Randy Orton vs. Christian

Randy starts fast again and dropkicks him before the bell, only to get draped across the top rope. Orton shrugs off some choking and gets two off a powerslam. Christian ducks a high crossbody and tries the Unprettier but Orton reverses into the Overdrive, botches the heck out of it, and then hits the second attempt for the pin.

JR gets his hat back and I have no idea why the Un-Americans are being treated like this.

Bischoff yells at Jeff and gives him another match with Big Show. Jeff leaves and Ric Flair comes in to say that kid has no respect. Apparently Rob Van Dam has challenged Flair for tonight and Eric isn’t sure if the match will take place. Flair is working on an ex-Smackdown talent but details are scarce.

Jeff Hardy vs. Big Show

Jacqueline is guest referee because that’s interesting. Jeff dives at him and is launched right back inside so the beating can begin. That includes a choke in the corner and a toss into the air for a big crash. One heck of a toss sends Hardy outside but Show posts himself. Jeff dropkicks a chair into Show’s head to knock him over the barricade and that’s a DQ.

Rating: D. The wrestling hasn’t been this show’s strong suit and it’s not like Jeff gets anything from this win. Big Show is right back to the lumbering oaf period and the bald spot isn’t helping him. It’s a bad match and bad booking, which has been a theme so far tonight. That’s not good when we’re a third of the way through the show.

Booker T. wants to fight Jericho (who insulted Booker in his earlier promo) but Chris already has a match tonight you see. The catchphrase is loaded up but Jericho dares to cut him off before the sucka. Dang man. Booker can’t get anything in tonight.

Raw World Title: Bubba Ray Dudley vs. HHH

Bubba is challenging and spray paints HHH on a table. We get a pretty nice speech about how Bubba wants to earn his title and prove that he’s more than just a tag wrestler. I’d buy into this if this wasn’t Bubba Ray Dudley vs. HHH in 2002. Or ever for that matter. They slug it out in the corner before heading outside with Flair looking a bit nervous.

Back in and Bubba spears him down for some right hands but no reaction because no one buys this as a potential title change. A Flair distraction lets HHH take over and we hit the choking for two. It’s off to the sleeper as we hear about how Bubba has waited twelve years for a title shot. The sleeper experiment has seemed to end though as there isn’t even a dramatic arm drop.

HHH misses a right hand and gets caught in a German suplex for a breather. Bubba adds a Samoan drop and a DDT for two, followed by the Bubba Bomb. Of course that draws Flair into the ring for a distraction so there’s no cover. Bubba can’t hit a powerbomb so HHH Pedigrees him to retain.

Rating: C-. I’ll give them points for throwing a bone to Bubba but no one who had ever watched wrestling before bought him as any kind of a threat. The match didn’t even run eight minutes and the fans just did not care because they knew it wasn’t going to happen. It wasn’t even bad, which is a minor miracle in its own right, but the lack of drama killed off anything they could have done.

Victoria jumps Trish as she’s getting ready.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish is defending and charges to the ring to start the brawl in a hurry. Victoria is thrown in and right back out but she sidesteps a dive off the apron to send Trish into the barricade. The slingshot legdrop gets two on the champ but Trish grabs a neckbreaker for the same. The Stratusphere gets the same and Victoria falls to the floor….where she grabs a chair for the DQ. This was kind of rocking until the quick ending.

Bischoff is spinning a wheel when Stacy (looking great here) cuts him off and asks for support in the semi-finals of the Internet Babe of the Year contest. Eric doesn’t care and explains Raw Roulette (Spin the Wheel, Make the Deal), which makes its debut next week. Stacy is given a match with Trish next week and leaves happy. Bischoff: “You’re not going to see anything like this on Monday Night Football.”

Video on Randy Orton.

The Un-Americans bicker some more.

Coach goes to talk to HHH but finds Flair, a good looking blonde and a bottle of champagne. HHH gets out of the shower to talk about his title defense at No Mercy. Two women call him back into the shower but Jericho comes in and wants a word. Coach is told to leave so Jericho hits on one of the girls. You would think they would throw the camera out too but maybe they’re into that kind of thing.

Tommy Dreamer/Rob Van Dam vs. Test/William Regal

Remember eight days ago when Van Dam was in a World Title match on pay per view? Dreamer throws Regal around to start before it’s off to Rob (still with bad ribs) to kick away at Test. It’s back to Regal for one heck of a suplex and Van Dam is in trouble. Unfortunately Jerry can’t talk about the possibilities of a bra and panties match so the match, which isn’t the most interesting in the world, isn’t getting any attention. Not that it matters anyway as Dreamer comes in off the hot tag and everything breaks down. Test can’t get the pumphandle so Van Dam kicks him into a rollup to give Dreamer the pin.

Rating: D. I’m so glad HHH gave Van Dam the rub so he could go and have a match like this. I know Dreamer is fine but teaming with him is a major downgrade for Van Dam, who was nothing but a sacrificial lamb for HHH. Then you have the Un-Americans who were champions two or three weeks ago and now they’re 0-3 tonight. I have no idea what the point is in the fast turnover but it’s been rather jarring.

Christian and Storm come out and get in a fight with Test and Regal before Dreamer and Van Dam clean house.

Booker gets in his SUCKA on Jericho an hour after he said “can you dig that”. I’ve always wanted him to do that and now he finally has! Uh, it’s not quite the thrill I was expecting.

Wrestlemania XIX press conference clip.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Kane

Kane is challenging and peppers the champ in the corner with some right hands. Jericho bails to the floor and gets slammed off the top for his efforts. Cue Flair to ringside (I’m sure he and Jericho are just fine after their big feud over the last month and a half.) so he can put Jericho’s foot on the rope after Kane hits a tilt-a-whirl slam.

The chase doesn’t go anywhere so Kane throws Jericho out to the floor for a big crash. Flair tries to get Jericho up, earning himself an ejection. Kane slugs him up the ramp for good measure and we take a break. Back with Kane getting crotched on top and superplexed as the fans seem to be cheering for Jericho. It’s time to start in on the knee with Kane getting knocked to the floor.

Lawler keeps talking about Jericho’s music career so JR suggests that he join the band as a spoon player. That’s quite the visual. Kane uses the good leg to kick his way out of a leglock so Jericho switched to the Hartbreaker around the post. Back in and Jericho stays on the leg but throws in a little dance to make it a bit more versatile.

Kane gets in a belly to back suplex and a tilt-a-whirl powerslam as the knee seems just fine. Jericho is sent into the steps and the top rope clothesline gets two. Now it’s HHH coming out for a distraction but it’s not enough to set up the Walls. HHH gets in a spinebuster (which looked so bad that JR called it a belly to belly, which isn’t that far off) on the floor for two and Jericho grabs a chair. With JR being SURE that HHH and Jericho are in cahoots, Kane gets to the ropes to break the Walls. The big boot and chokeslam give Kane the title.

Rating: C. I’ll give them points for the longer match but I really don’t buy that Jericho and Flair are all cool so soon. I get that Flair is just a goon at this point and HHH had some meeting with Jericho but Chris and Flair being willing to work together so soon doesn’t fit. What also doesn’t fit is the match being focused on the knee and then having Kane just pop up like nothing happened. At least have a problem getting him up for the chokeslam. Finally, if you’re going to have Kane be the next sacrificial lamb to HHH, what’s the point in giving him the Tag Team Titles?

Overall Rating: D+. The problem here is the booking as we’re closing in on HHH vanquishing Kane (and beating a double champion in the process) and….who else came out of this show looking good? The Un-Americans are mostly split, Booker T., Goldust, Jericho and Van Dam all look to have nothing positive right now and Jeff Hardy is thrilled with a countout win over Big Show.

This show is all about HHH looking great and smarter than anyone else, which really does make me wonder why I’m supposed to care about the rest of the roster. Maybe HHH can give them a rub, which of course means him beating them into dust because it’s his show and anyone who thinks otherwise is getting the sledgehammer of reality to the head.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 23, 2002
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Unforgiven and the big story on the Raw side is Ric Flair joining forces with HHH to form….well to form nothing at the moment but that’s the only noteworthy thing that happened last night. I’m worried about what we’ll be getting going forward but that’s so often the case around here. Let’s get to it.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly vs. Victoria

Trish is defending after winning the title last night. Victoria goes after the champ before Molly even gets to the ring and the fight is on in a hurry. As Lawler asks if Trish is the hottest Women’s Champion ever, the challengers start double teaming Trish as you might expect them to do. That earns them a double clothesline and some signature stuff but Molly lifts her up for a toss out to the floor (and one heck of a bump). Back in and Molly avoids Victoria’s moonsault, setting up a collision to knock Molly into Trish’s rollup to retain the title.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing to see (save for that nasty crash to the floor) but this was quick enough to not overstay its welcome. The women just aren’t good enough at this point to work a long match so it’s a good idea to keep things short here. Victoria looked a lot more aggressive here and that’s the best thing possible for Trish and the title.

Booker T. and Goldust show some of the roster clips of last night with Eric Bischoff getting humiliated. Goldust: “I haven’t seen anything that bad since Chris Jericho’s last Fozzy concert.” As a bonus, Goldust has a picture of Bischoff with Rikishi’s thong replacing the face. Rico: “That’s disgusting! I’M TELLING ERIC!”

Bischoff welcomes an unnamed face to the Raw side when Rico comes in. Eric wants to know where Rico was last night but it was Bischoff who sent them out on the town. Anyway Rico tells him what Booker and Goldust were up to and Eric is ticked.

After a break, here’s a ticked off Bischoff in the arena. Bischoff isn’t cool with the fans booing him but more importantly, Vince McMahon has issued a new decree: there’s a freeze on all contracts and no one gets to jump between shows unless there is an official trade. However he made a few last minute deals before the deadline with details coming later.

For now though, Booker needs to come out here RIGHT NOW. Bischoff wants an explanation but Booker calls him a skippy hippie. Booker keeps making jokes about last night and says Bischoff’s breath is heinous like a fat man’s anus. Cue 3 Minute Warning and Rico for the beatdown with Goldust’s save going nowhere.

Post break, Rico offers to face Booker tonight and Chris Jericho comes up to demand a shot at Goldust for the Fozzy insult. Eric agrees but makes it an Intercontinental Title shot. That’s a very face move for a heel boss.

Jeff Hardy vs. Big Show

Jeff goes right after him to start and actually hits something like a suicide dive. That’s not what you do to a giant though and he tosses Jeff over the top so we can have the opening bell. Back in and Jeff dropkicks him in the knee and hits the Swanton across Show’s back for what is likely his only near fall. Show just blasts him with the overhand chop to bust open Jeff’s shirt. That’s enough for Show as he plants Jeff with the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. I’m so glad we’re getting the renewed Big Show push because I just don’t want to imagine a WWE without it. Allegedly Hardy was rather, ahem, unable to perform last week so this might have been punishment as a result. I’d rather have that instead of “comedy” but Big Show might not be the best choice to push.

We look back at Tommy Dreamer beating up Christopher Nowinski two weeks back.

Nowinski is in a classroom and wants to fight dreamer. Post break Dreamer shows up and gets caned down. Dreamer puts him through the ceiling and the beating just keeps going because we NEED hardcore stuff around here without actually having hardcore matches.

Randy Orton vs. Steven Richards

Here’s one of the talent jumps but it’s not clear if he was the mystery man earlier. Orton hits his quick dropkick as the crowd is just silent for this. Richards slows things down and gets two off a side slam. The rather slow pace continues until Orton slips out of a neckbreaker and grabs a belly to back suplex.

Commentary would suggest that the company wants Orton to be the next Rocky Maivia but it’s not quite working. How can Orton be considered a blue chipper without a Jheri Curl? Orton’s backbreaker and powerslam get two each, only to walk into the Stevie Kick for two. That means a freak out session and choking from Richards, only to eat the high crossbody to give Orton the pin. Lawler: “THIS KID IS PHENOMENAL!” Just….no Jerry.

Rating: D-. Above all else this was incredibly boring. Orton has no character at this point and there’s only so much you’re going to be able to do in a match against a low level nothing like Richards. It’s a really boring match and that doesn’t make Orton seem like the bright star that the announcers are pushing him to be.

The Union Underground performs Across the Nation (Raw’s theme) while some Divas dance. Lillian looks like she’s just enjoying the song, Terri looks like she has no idea what she’s doing (might not be her kind of music) and Jackie is having a great time while barely staying in her top. Stacy is miles ahead of all of them as she looks amazing and clearly has done this kind of dancing for a long time.

Here’s Flair for the big explanation. Last week, HHH yelled at him and said Flair was pathetic. HHH was right and it’s because Flair was too busy listening to the fans. When he was a kid, HHH wanted to be Ric Flair (or Hulk Hogan if you listen to the story from back in April) and now Flair is going to try to pull that off.

If HHH is willing, Flair is going to teach him how to get to another level. Flair’s payment is very simple: he gets to be by the champ’s side and spend the twilight of his career on top where he belongs. Rob Van Dam tries to interfere but HHH beats him down from behind. The double team is on until Bubba Ray Dudley makes the save.

Two notes here: first of all, they kept this short but covered the point. We know why Flair did it and we know what he gets out of it. Simple yet effective, as promos often need to be.

Second, this is a great example of how important it is to have the right character in the right role. I can accept the idea that HHH is a huge Flair fan and wants to be just like him. There’s no specific reason but it’s something I could accept at face value. For an example of it going bad, look back at AJ Styles doing the same thing in 2010. I can imagine AJ being a Flair fan but I absolutely can’t believe one of the most natural faces ever being a Nature Boy clone. You need to have the right kind of character for any given role and it works very well here, which is why the angle should work as well as it’s going to.

Post break Bubba and Van Dam say this is the people’s show and demand a tag match tonight. Bischoff comes up to say it’s his show but allows the match anyway.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Goldust

Jericho is defending and these two are somehow still active fifteen years later. Goldust gets in a quick hiptoss and catapult to send him into the buckle. The champ comes right back with a bulldog and cranks on the neck as we hear about how big a band Fozzy really is. With that going nowhere, Jericho hits an extended trash talk sequence. It’s enough for Goldust to fight back with something like a Boss Man Slam/chokeslam but the Curtain Call is broken up. Goldust will settle for a powerslam but the referee breaks up Shattered Dreams. Jericho gets in the enziguri and the Walls retain the title.

Rating: C. Not bad here, as you might expect. I don’t think anyone was going to buy Goldust as a full fledged threat to win the title but you’re going to get a completely watchable match out of him. I’m still not entirely sure why Jericho has the title again but he’s far from the worst choice.

Tag Team Titles: Un-Americans vs. Kane/???

Kane is challenging along with his partner…..the Hurricane? Again it’s not clear if he was the one who was in Bischoff’s office or not but it doesn’t really matter. An early Blockbuster puts Christian down but the rest of the team jumps Hurricane on the floor. Kane does his best angry stare for the save and it’s Christian getting in a few stomps of his own. We hit the chinlock for a bit until a clothesline puts both guys down.

Hurricane dives over for the hot tag and the fans react as strongly as they can. House is quickly cleaned until Regal gets in a title shot to Kane’s head. Er, mask. Either way, it only gets two and Regal and Test are both ejected for their efforts. Charles Robinson trying to be intimidating is one of the best comedy spots of the year. Hurricane gets a sloppy hurricanrana on Christian and heel miscommunication sets up a double chokeslam (eh cute) for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C-. I’m so glad we had the Un-Americans all over the show for so many weeks to have them lose to the latest thrown together team. I’ve seen worse matches though and Hurricane is always entertaining, at least for a quick laugh. Not bad here and the fans got into the American victory, which is the whole point here.

Post break Hurricane says he and Kane are perfect together because they both wear masks and both use chokeslams. Tonight it’s time to celebrate and Kane says freaks are cool. Hurricane is ready to go to the Hurricave but Kane stops to kiss Terri before leaving with his partner.

Regal isn’t happy but says the team will regroup.

Booker T. vs. Rico

Booker hammers away in the corner until Rico reverses and fires off some kicks to the head. That springboard version always looks good. A kneelift only seems to fire Booker up and it’s the forearm into the Spinarooni. The scissors kick ends Rico in short order.

Post match it’s 3 Minute Warning for the beatdown and Goldust for the failed save. The difference is Booker is in gear instead of street clothes like earlier and Goldust actually hits Shattered Dreams on Rico before getting taken apart. Totally different idea you see.

Bischoff makes 3 Minute Warning vs. Goldust/Booker T. for next week. Again, not exactly a heel move. It’s putting them on square footing and taking away the Samoans’ advantage. How is that a heel boss?

Van Dam says he’s at peace with HHH and Flair but isn’t impassionate despite his bad ribs.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Rob Van Dam vs. HHH/Ric Flair

After some long entrances, HHH jumps Bubba from behind and gets backdropped for his efforts. The fans want tables but get Flair, who has no issues with Bubba, making this kind of pointless. Some shoulders put Flair down as JR thinks Ric is going through “the change of life”.

It’s right back to HHH as Bubba seems a bit hesitant to tag in the injured RVD. Bubba gets the better of a chop off with Flair before it’s off to Rob for a series of kicks. Rolling Thunder isn’t the best idea and HHH doesn’t stay down long enough to really validate the pain on the bad ribs. HHH gets in a belly to back suplex but the hot tag brings in Bubba a few seconds later.

The fans react like they’re watching an Orton match and only pick up a bit as Bubba hammers on Flair. House is quickly cleaned and Van Dam plays D-Von on What’s Up. It’s table time but HHH shoves Van Dam off the top. A throat snap across the top knocks Bubba into a Flair rollup (with tights) for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was awkward with the wrestling not being great and the story being sort of all over the place. It’s clear that they’re setting up Bubba as the next challenger (which is likely only going to be short term) and I’m really not sure how that’s going to work. The story makes sense but I’m not sure if Bubba Ray Dudley is going to work in that role no matter what. Van Dam really does look like a one off challenger and that’s a really bad thing given how second rate he looked next to HHH.

Bubba saves Van Dam from a low blow and almost completely misses the table when powerbombing HHH. The champ hit the corner and the table didn’t even break, causing the crowd to go almost silent. Van Dam legdrops him through the table (makes sense due to the bad ribs) instead to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. The bad times are here and that’s got me worried going forward. There was WAY too much 3 Minute Warning vs. Goldust/Booker T. (a fine feud on its own but it was a lot of overkill here) and too many nothing matches (the opener, Orton and Hardy vs. Big Show) to fill out a two hour show. Cut out some of the filler (like the concert, which felt completely tacked on) and turn it into some better stories and the show will improve. As for now though, Raw is back to its normal horrible.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 9, 2002
Location: Hilton Coliseum, Ames, Iowa
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

So there’s a new World Champion and that means we get to hear about how amazing HHH really is. That’s been the case around here for a long time but you can feel it cranking into a much higher level around this point. We’re a few weeks away from Unforgiven and the only match that seems to be coming up is HHH vs. Rob Van Dam for the title. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: Un-Americans vs. Kane/Bradshaw

Lance Storm and Christian are defending after another failed flag burning last week. After the standard AMERICA ROCKS speech from Bradshaw, the brawl is on in a hurry. Bradshaw shoulders Storm all the way out to the floor and it’s off to Kane for some right hands of his own. Christian comes in and takes just as much of a beating as this is one sided, just as it probably should be to start.

Kane’s side slam gets two on Christian but a Canadian crotching against the post lets the champs take over for the first time. Ah so it’s one of those matches where low blows work on Kane. You never know how that’s going to work. The fans think Canada sucks (racists) but a hot tag to Bradshaw makes them a bit happier.

House is cleaned with one heck of a powerbomb on Christian and Kane’s top rope clothesline to Storm. The ref gets bumped though and here’s Test with the big boot to Kane. Bradshaw makes the save but William Regal comes in to knock him out with the Power of the Punch, giving Christian the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. This was better than it had any right to be but the ending really dragged it down a bit. They didn’t need to have new champions here but just have Regal or Test instead of both of them. I was surprised by the action here though and that’s how Raw should start: a fun match instead of a long talking segment.

Speaking of a talking segment, here’s Eric Bischoff to announce a four way for the #1 contendership with Jeff Hardy vs. Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Jericho. That brings us to Smackdown and Stephanie (you knew that was coming) with this week’s commitment ceremony getting publicity in the New York Times, the New York Post and ESPN. Bischoff has his own idea though: HLA, Hot Lesbian Action. As my head hurts, I can kind of appreciate them for not hiding what they’re going for. They’re just flat out admitting that the women are sex objects, which I can take over a horrible attempt at “wrestling”.

Chris Jericho eats an apple and says he has a plan to get the World Title back. This means apple being spit on Terri.

HHH doesn’t care who he faces for the title at the pay per view. Cue Bubba Ray Dudley to accuse HHH of being a coward and can’t wait to see HHH vs. Spike Dudley tonight. Steven Richards, Bubba’s opponent for tonight, jumps him from behind as I wonder why Bubba is the one getting this push.

Terri and Trish Stratus walk past the lesbians’ dressing room, which has an actual “LESBIANS” sign on the door. They’re not exactly subtle here.

Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Steven Richards

Bubba charges down the ramp to jump him from behind and it’s time for some early elbow drops. The fans want tables as Lawler plays Who’s The Lesbian. Richards comes back with a forearm and a swinging neckbreaker, only to have Bubba hit a surprisingly good looking sunset flip for two of his own. The Flip, Flop and Fly actually gets Jerry’s mind off the lesbians for a change but Richards gets two off a superkick (and a very strong pop). Steven breaks up a super Bubba Bomb but can’t get out of a super sitout powerbomb for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was a bit more energetic than I was expecting and that finish looked great. That being said, I’m not sure I can get behind the idea of a Bubba vs. HHH match. I know they’re building Bubba up fairly well but that doesn’t mean I want to see him have some long match way above his talent range. Just stop doing things that you aren’t ready to pull off, like separate titles.

Victoria/Stacy Keibler vs. Terri/Trish Stratus

Stacy, in black shorts and a matching tied off top, sends Lawler even further over the edge. Terri and Stacy catfight to the floor and it’s time for a lot of slapping. Lawler: “Oh they like it rough.” Victoria and Terri (oh dear) start things off with Terri getting slammed for an elbow drop. Stacy does her long legged choke in the corner as Lawler has binoculars. JR has just about had it here and I can’t say I blame him.

Terri slips out of an over the shoulder backbreaker and some heel miscommunication goes nowhere because Terri isn’t smart enough to make a hot tag. Thankfully it’s off to Trish thanks to a missed moonsault so we actually get a little wrestling. It’s back to Stacy for the awkward looking kicks but Trish easily knocks them both silly. Terri hits a high crossbody to put Stacy away.

Rating: D-. What exactly is there to say here? The wrestling only existed when Trish and Victoria were in there, which of course was the smallest percentage of the match. I can’t stand this nonsense and it’s not fair to people who have the ability to work a decent match. Why do we need Stacy and Terri in there other than for eye candy? I mean…..I just answered my own question.

Jerry is disappointed in the lack of HLA and you can hear JR getting more and more annoyed.

Regal dumps Christopher Nowinski to join the Un-Americans. Chris talks about HLA and Regal slaps him in the face because Chris is an embarrassment. Preach it brother.

Here’s Nowinski with something to say, including a few jabs at Iowa State’s football team. Back at Harvard they have a chant: “Five, ten, fifteen bucks. We’ll own the company, you’ll drive the trucks.” Cue Tommy Dreamer with offers of Singapore cane shots, triggering a brawl with Dreamer getting the better of it. Nothing to see here though Nowinski was kind of funny.

Spike runs into the Lesbians and really doesn’t care. Again I say, preach it brother.

HHH vs. Spike Dudley

Non-title. Spike wants nothing to do with a handshake and it’s time to fight over wrist control. A rollup annoys HHH so he slaps Spike in the face. Spike slaps him right back so Lawler calls him a pervert. Those running forearms drop HHH as you can feel the attempts at HHH vs. Taka Michinoku from 2000.

Back in and Spike charges into a boot, followed by a few backbreakers. The third is countered into a headscissors though and Spike hits a dive to the floor. Back in again and HHH clotheslines him out of the air with Lawler blaming thoughts of hot lesbian action for Spike’s issues. The Pedigree gets no cover so Spike gets in a low blow, followed by the Dudley Dog for two. Another Dudley Dog is blocked though and HHH grabs a sleeper of all things for the win, drawing a weird face pop in the process.

Rating: D+. They tried here but there’s only so much that can be done with Spike Dudley vs. the World Champion. On top of that, what in the world was the point in finishing with a sleeper? Are we really supposed to buy the idea of a sleeper as a main event finisher? I know HHH fancies himself as a huge old school style star but come on now.

HHH keeps stomping until Bubba comes out for the save.

Jeff Hardy is talking about his main event tonight when he sees Bischoff and goes to yell about next week. Why Jeff just suddenly saw him when it looks like Bischoff has been standing there for awhile and Jeff was looking in the same direction the whole time isn’t clear. Jeff threatens violence if there’s another 3 Minute Warning.

Chris Jericho offers Big Show a deal and leaves. Johnny the Bull of all people comes in and hears about Jericho’s offer of an alliance, complete with the statistics to go with it. Johnny thinks it’s a good idea and gets thrown into a chair.

Booker is ready to face the Un-Americans tonight when Goldust comes up wearing a Kane mask. Of course the real Kane comes up and comedy ensues. Since it’s Booker and Goldust though, it’s actually funny. Bradshaw comes up and tells them to go beat up the Un-Americans, but first let’s watch the HLA. Goldust is aghast but Kane says he’ll go.

Booker T./Goldust vs. William Regal/Test

Test knocks Booker into the corner to start so it’s off to Goldust for a hip attack on Regal. That’s about it for the offense as Test stomps Goldust down in the corner before Regal adds in a few knee shots to the head. Goldust’s clothesline allows the hot tag off to Booker for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down and Regal gets in the Power of the Punch, only to have Kane and Bradshaw come in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but I’m sure the fans will have fun chanting USA for most of the time. Despite not being the strongest team in the world, the Un-Americans will be fine enough for a midcard act for the next few months. I’m not sure if Bradshaw and Kane are the best options for opponents but at least we’re getting some entertaining promos.

It’s HLA time with Bischoff moderating. Bad acting ensues, there’s a bit of stripping and a kiss before 3 Minute Warning comes in for the obvious finish. So to clarify: Bischoff teasing us with HLA is a heel move but Stephanie not delivering a fake gay wedding is going to make her the big face. That’s how WWE works here and it’s really rather confusing.

Ric Flair gives Rob Van Dam a pep talk.

Rob Van Dam vs. Big Show vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title and under elimination rules. Show beats on Van Dam in the corner to start while Jeff is backdropped to the floor. Poetry in Motion fails completely and Show tosses Van Dam down as well. Back in and Rob teams up with Jeff to put Show down but the Swanton only gets two.

Rolling Thunder gets the same with Rob being launched onto the referee. Jericho cleans house with a chair but Show takes it away and Jericho teases getting hit….for a DQ. You mean Big Show can’t take a Swanton for a pin in a nothing four way elimination match and has to get disqualified instead? Seriously?

We take a break and come back with Van Dam diving onto Jericho, followed by Hardy running the barricade for the double clothesline. A double springboard moonsault gets two on Chris and a double superplex makes it even worse for him. The good guys follow it up with a double springboard leg lariat to put Chris outside. With the Canadian gone, Van Dam DDT’s Jeff for two but Jericho breaks up the Swanton and steals the pin.

Van Dam is right back up with a spinning kick to Jericho’s face but he gets caught in one heck of a release German suplex. Back up and Jericho posts himself in the corner but manages to remove a turnbuckle pad. Rolling Thunder hits knees to give Chris two more and the Lionsault is good for yet another near fall. Cue HHH to watch as Van Dam sends Chris into the buckle and drops the Five Star to go to Unforgiven.

Rating: B. It’s like Wrestlemania XVI all over again: once you get rid of Big Show, the match gets a lot better in a hurry. The key thing here is Van Dam winning as he was supposed to and getting the pin for the final victory. It makes him look like a bigger deal because just being the Intercontinental Champion doesn’t mean much around here. I mean, was his title pulled out of a briefcase just a week ago?

Overall Rating: D+. While the main event is good, it’s not enough to pull a lot of this show up out of the muck. As usual, the biggest problem around here is the one joke dominating the whole thing. That HLA segment was as pandering as you could get and that’s not the way I like my wrestling shows. There’s some good stuff here but the big problems are too much for it to overcome.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 2, 2002
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

So uh, we don’t have a World Champion around here anymore because Brock Lesnar is the second latest casualty of the Brand Wars. The latest casualty is the Undertaker, who went back to Smackdown when Stephanie basically just told him to come because that’s how this era works. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Eric Bischoff to open things up and he’s got a briefcase. Bischoff gets right to the point: Raw needs a champion so here’s the REAL #1 contender: HHH. Eric praises HHH by saying WCW would have won the Monday Night Wars with HHH on their side. HHH takes credit for running Lesnar off and says his wife knew what was best for the company (Wouldn’t that be signing HHH?).

It’s time for the briefcase which contains the Big Gold Belt because HHH is the brand new World Heavyweight Champion (Thereby beginning its lineage. I’ve heard people say it’s the same lineage as the WCW and/or NWA World Titles and it’s still nonsense. This belt began here and that’s all there is to it.).

HHH starts in on the big speech and here’s Ric Flair to cut him off. No one ever handed him a title in a briefcase (True. When Kevin Nash literally gave him the title for reign #16, there was no briefcase involved.) so Flair thinks he should get a title shot tonight. Bischoff makes the match and both guys say it’s going to be an honor. Are we in TNA all of a sudden? HHH gets in a cheap shot before leaving.

Post break, HHH and Bubba Ray Dudley run into each other and Bubba is declared jealous. HHH talks about how Bubba could be champion one day. Bubba isn’t pleased and calls the belt Raw’s salvation before saying he’ll win the title soon enough. Uh, right.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Trish Stratus vs. Molly Holly/Christopher Nowinski

Tables match. Earlier today, Chris said that after their opponents are put through tables, he’ll burst through something else. I’ll quote the following line: “And by that, I mean Molly’s hymen.” What is with these disturbing stories involving Molly? First she’s fat (not really but whatever), then she’s horrible because she’s a virgin and now it’s about taking her virginity. I know they need characters but this is ridiculous.

The guys start with Nowinski actually taking over before it’s off to Molly. That means a failed powerbomb attempt as Molly grabs a waistlock. King: “What’s that? The hymen maneuver?” It leads to some dancing as Molly’s pointless humiliation continues. I speak too soon as Bully takes her pants down (King: “IS THAT HER HYMEN???”), allowing Trish to get in a few spanks.

A WE WANT PUPPIES chant starts up as Molly gets in a neckbreaker, only to have Trish grab her own to put both women down. Bubba comes in and cleans Nowinski’s clock, giving us the “Chris falls into Molly’s crotch” spot. Chris takes What’s Up and it’s finally table time. The Molly Go Round drops Trish but Bubba saves her from the table. Nowinski misses a splash to drive himself through a table and that counts as an elimination, likely as the referee wants this to end. Molly is sent through to finally end this.

Rating: No. In every possible sense of the word, no. This wasn’t funny, this wasn’t amusing, this wasn’t something that belongs on any wrestling show ever. Just imagine someone saying ANY of these jokes on a wrestling show today and think how long they would last before being fired. This was horrible and I feel so sorry for Molly having to deal with this nonsense.

Christian and Lance Storm don’t think much of American pride or Kane for that matter either. Storm laughs off the idea of such a fat country celebrating Labor Day. Test teases more flag burning.

Bischoff gives Terri and Stacy a lingerie pillow fight. Eric gets a preview of their attire and makes various jokes.

Chris Jericho yells at Flair for getting the title shot but Ric brings up Jericho tapping out at Summerslam. Jericho hopes Flair wins so he can get the title back. These two have good chemistry together.

William Regal vs. Booker T.

Regal slugs away to start but King wants to talk about the pillow fight. Booker’s right hands don’t have much effect as Regal knocks him to the floor. Back in and the Regal Cutter gets two, only to get caught by Booker’s collection of kicks for the pin.

Rating: D+. Well…it could have been worse. The problem here is that there’s no real reason to have the match but at least the right guy won. Regal hasn’t been doing anything of note in recent weeks but Booker is getting more and more over every week. I mean, it would be nice if they went somewhere with that (say, across a few continents, like something INTERCONTINENTAL, but that’s just nonsense of course) but for now it’s just Spinaroonis all around.

Booker does the Spinarooni.

We look back at Shawn Michaels winning at Summerslam but getting attacked by HHH.

Shawn is in a wheelchair and doesn’t know if he’ll ever get his mobility back (though he does have feeling in his legs). What he does know is that it was all worth it and as far as HHH goes, what goes around comes around. Shawn picks up a sledgehammer and stares.

HHH is rubbing the title and smiling way too much.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Ric Flair

HHH is defending of course. Flair quickly takes him down so we can hit the technical sequence. One heck of a chop sends HHH to the floor before it’s time to work on the arm for a bit. The technical, which means boring here, pace continues as HHH stomps in the corner and whips Flair over the corner and out to the floor.

HHH cranks up the speed with a suplex so Flair gives him a belly to back version. The kneedrop misses and HHH very, VERY slowly starts working on it but makes sure to walk around a bit in between. The Figure Four is countered into a small package for two on HHH, followed by an Irish whip into a chop. I’m still waiting on them to top that suplex.

A very basic whip into the corner sets up a way too big bump over the corner to send HHH to the floor. Back in and the shinbreaker sets up the Figure Four but HHH makes the ropes. The referee is sent to the floor, low blow, Pedigree and the title is retained. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: D-. I can accept the idea of a slower paced match but this felt like two seventy year olds who were on a reunion show. I’m sure HHH had a blast wrestling a rather old school style match against Flair but isn’t one big present enough in one night? HHH can be entertaining but this was taking everything that made him work (as a heel that is) and putting it in slow motion.

Post match Jericho comes out to put Flair in the Walls but Rob Van Dam makes a save.

Big Show yells at Bischoff, demanding to be #1 contender. Bischoff says go impress him and Show leaves. Eric gets a call and yells in his exposition voice that someone is jumping from Raw to join a family member on Smackdown.

Kane vs. Lance Storm/Christian

Kane shrugs off a double team and throws Storm at Christian for the early advantage. The slow (WAY too common of a theme tonight) pace begins again with Kane getting beaten down in the corner, allowing some cheap double teaming to put him down for two. The Unprettier is broken up and an electric chair puts Christian down. Kane’s comeback is cut off by even more double teaming as this is just BORING. How can you have three talented guys putting on such an uninteresting match? Storm superkicks Christian by mistake and it’s a chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D. The Tag Team Champions, as in the ONLY Tag Team Champions in the company, just got beat clean in less than six minutes by someone who hasn’t had a match in four months. Normally I would call this an issue of the era but champions losing will always be an issue in WWE.

Post match Test tries to burn the flag but Bradshaw returns for the save. Oh. Great.

Big Show vs. Tommy Dreamer

Show throws him around with ease, then throws him around with no effort, followed by throwing him around like he’s nothing. The referee tells him not to use a chair though so Dreamer uses it and Show wins via DQ.

Dreamer beats the heck out of Show because we’re to the point where TOMMY DREAMER might be an option.

HHH wants to fight RVD tonight (HHH? Wanting to have three major segments on one show? You don’t say!) so Bischoff makes a tag with HHH/Jericho vs. Flair/Van Dam. At least Jericho and HHH argue to keep up some continuity.

Jeff Hardy vs. Crash

…..Crash is the one jumping isn’t he? This show has been so bad and so dull that it would be the only possible choice. Bischoff comes out before the bell and accuses Jeff of being the jumper so he sends out 3 Minute Warning for the big beatdown.

Jeff gets destroyed and OF COURSE CRASH IS THE ONE LEAVING. Bischoff is shocked because someone whose last (non-instant Hardcore Title match) win on Raw was in June 2001 is jumping to Raw.

Stacy Keibler vs. Terri

There’s a carpet, bed and pillows in the ring with Jerry Lawler doing running commentary. There’s spanking, stuffed animals, a slam onto a bed, a Bronco Buster and a rollup gives Terri the pin in less than two minutes. Holy sweet goodness END THIS SHOW ALREADY.

Post match Stacy hits her with a loaded pillow and covers her with a bucket of oil, which just happened to be underneath the ring. Feathering ensues. I’m so glad they had Stacy stop being the sexy assistant (as in the role she was born to play) to be….whatever this is.

HHH/Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam/Ric Flair

Van Dam goes after the heels before Flair can come out for no apparent reason, meaning Ric gets to make the save. We settle down to Jericho suplexing Van Dam for two so Lawler starts talking about the hymen again. Flair struts in as we hit the WOO before Jericho easily drops him. HHH gets in some right hands of his own but Jericho crotches himself, allowing the hot tag off to Van Dam.

One heck of a chair shot drops Rob but the fans are too busy chanting FOZZY SUCKS. Van Dam takes every main event tag team beating that you’ve ever seen in about three minutes until HHH throws Flair to the floor. Rob comes back with a few kicks to HHH but Jericho breaks up the Five Star. The Lionsault gives HHH two and Flair puts Jericho in the Figure Four on the outside. That allows HHH to bring in the title and very blatantly hold it up for the Van Daminator. The Five Star puts HHH away.

Rating: D+. See? He puts people over! All it took was a belt shot and Van Dam being fresh while HHH was in his second match. The match wasn’t half bad actually and sets up the title shot, but it’s WAY too late to save this show, especially with a match that wasn’t all that great in the first place.

Overall Rating: F. This was horrible and I have no idea how else to describe it. Between making jokes about taking Molly’s virginity and King going on and on about her various body parts to HHH taking his sweet time getting the World Title to the AWFUL Flair vs. HHH match to the pillow fight to a story about Crash freaking Holly (good thing he was on the show tonight) to the Tag Team Champions doing a clean job, I can’t think of a single good thing on this show. I’ll give Bischoff this much: I feel like I’m watching Nitro more and more every single week.

This show got as close to breaking me as anything has in a good while. It felt like there was no effort being put in here other than to amuse the people who put it together while making HHH into the most boring top star in history. I really could not stand this show and if this is where we’re going for the next several months, they’re in a lot of trouble.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the History of the WWE’s Big Four Pay Per Views, now in PAPERBACK. Check out the information here:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 26, 2002
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re past Summerslam and that means a lot of things have changed. To begin with, Shawn Michaels shocked the world and beat HHH in one heck of a street fight. Other than that, Brock Lesnar is the new WWE World Champion but is exclusively signed to Smackdown. It’s not clear if that’s going to mean we need something new around here for HHH to likely dominate. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Eric Bischoff to open up “his” Monday Night Raw. Tonight we’re going to combine the Hardcore Title with the Intercontinental Title which is probably best for everyone. On top of that, we’re going to have a special Lifetime Achievement Award for a member of the WWE Hall of Fame.

As for right now though, Bischoff brings out Brock and Heyman for a chat. The fans are happy when Lesnar comes out but cut Paul off with the ROCKY chants. Heyman finally gets to talk and says every legacy before Lesnar’s doesn’t matter, including Hulk Hogan and Bruno Sammartino. Enough of that though as Paul goes into a glorious rant about how no one believed him when he promised that Lesnar would do all this. Lesnar brags about being twenty five years old….and here’s HHH to Shawn’s music because THIS NEEDS TO BE ABOUT HIM.

That’s the last time you’ll ever hear Shawn’s horrible music because HHH has gotten rid of him for good. As for right now though, Lesnar only has that title because HHH softened Rock up for him. HHH wants a title shot but here’s Undertaker to cut them both off. Undertaker wants the first shot at the young pup and the fight is on. Lesnar gets knocked to the floor but HHH is allowed to leave mostly unscathed. WAY too much non-Lesnar here but we all need more HHH in our lives.

Booker T. vs. Christian

After what looks like a quickly fixed lighting problem, Booker hammers away until a reverse DDT onto the knee puts him down. A chinlock sets up some choking until Booker pops up with the spinning sunset flip out of the corner for two. Goldust and Lance Storm get in a fight (of course) and it’s the scissors kick for the pin on Christian.

Rating: C-. Just a quick match here to keep the Tag Team Title feud going, though I’m not sure what they’re waiting on at this point. It’s not like the Un-Americans are all that interesting as heels or champions so just let them lose the belts already to an interesting team. Booker is getting hotter and hotter every week, which almost guarantees his imminent destruction.

The WWE was in New York for the Smackdown Your Vote campaign.

Test has plans for the American flag tonight. This isn’t likely to end well.

Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley vs. Christopher Nowinski/William Regal

The villains have Molly Holly in their corner due to one heck of a horribly acted segment between Chris and Molly. Bubba side slams Chris to start and Spike adds a top rope stomp (that always looks so painful) for no cover. Chris pops back up and distracts the referee so Spike can get crotched against the post. The beating doesn’t last long as Spike gets up and tags Bubba so everything can break down. What’s Up hits Molly and it’s table time. That goes nowhere so it’s the Bubba Bomb to end Regal.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here as I didn’t know this story was still going. Are we really supposed to be interested in Nowinski wanting to sleep with Molly? It’s the start of a character at least but Nowinski really isn’t the most interesting guy in the world no matter what. At least it’s better than making fun of Molly’s weight.

Post match Nowinski saves Molly from the table.

Bischoff tells the guest to come out when Eric says.

Molly thanks Chris and offers to help him if need be.

Apparently that would be after the break as Bischoff brings out Jimmy Snuka. Highlight package, Bischoff cuts him off, 3 Minute Warning, JR is aghast. Chris Jericho comes out and puts Snuka in the Walls of Jericho and tells the has been to get out of the ring. Who would guess that we would see something similar at Wrestlemania one day? Jericho shows us some clips from last night and claims that he made Flair tap out. Since Fozzy’s concert was cut off last week, Jericho belts out his own version of New York, New York.

Chris Jericho vs. Jeff Hardy

Jericho knocks him around to start until Jeff gets in a dropkick of his own to take over for a bit. Lawler talks about a tuxedo vs. evening gown match later tonight as Jeff sends Jericho outside for a big dive off the top. The dive off the apron is countered into a powerslam (cool looking spot) and Jericho starts choking with Jeff’s shirt.

A missed dropkick has Jeff in even more trouble (it might help if he did something other than throw dropkicks) so we hit the abdominal stretch. This isn’t exactly burning up the mat so far. When the hold goes nowhere, Jericho heads up top but gets dropkicked out of the air. Even that’s not enough to pop the crowd very strongly but the Whisper in the Wind does a bit better. The Swanton is good for two as Jericho grabs the rope. Jericho grabs the Walls and Hardy grabs the rope, only to have Jericho refuse to break for the DQ.

Rating: D+. These two are capable of doing so much better and I’m not sure why they were this dull here. I don’t know if Jeff is just done or if Jericho’s stuff with the submissions isn’t working but I don’t know how you go from good last night to a near disaster just a day later. Maybe it’s a bad night but this was a big disappointment.

Brock doesn’t care who wins tonight.

Test wants to burn the American flag. After a break, here are the Un-Americans with Test carrying a blowtorch. Kane’s pyro goes off but Booker and Goldust make the save instead. The Texans are cleaned out and it’s Kane (with a new half mask) coming in for the real save. So we owe one to Spain. Make that two as we get a Kane-A-Rooni.

Intercontinental Title: Tommy Dreamer vs. Rob Van Dam

Officially this is a unification match but the Hardcore Title is done no matter what so I guess it’s not on the line. This is however under hardcore rules so Dreamer has a bit of an advantage. They shake hands and we’re ready to go. We actually start with some technical stuff until Dreamer dropkicks him in the face to take over.

It’s time for the first kendo stick and a White Russian legsweep gets two on Rob. They head outside with a ladder being bridged between the ring and the barricade. Dreamer hits a quick spinebuster but can’t suplex Rob onto the ladder. Instead Van Dam shoves him face first into the ladder, setting up a kick off the ladder for two.

Back in and the DDT gives Dreamer two, followed by a middle rope elbow which only hits the ladder. Rolling Thunder onto the ladder onto Dreamer and Rob crotches him for a bonus. The dropkick drives a chair into Dreamer’s face and the Five Star gets rid of the Hardcore Title for good.

Rating: C+. Not a bad match actually and it’s nice to see the division go out on a nice note instead of 18 people who never do anything else hitting a single weapon shot for a pin. I’m no Dreamer fan but it’s cool to see him having a good match in his element like this, even if he had no chance of winning.

Lillian Garcia vs. Howard Finkel

The winner is permanent ring announcer. It’s a tuxedo/evening gown match, meaning whoever is stripped first loses. Stacy Keibler comes out to keep an eye on Trish so Howard says she’s interfering with something in his trousers. JR: “Howard may get aroused!” Thankfully the fans boo this out of the building until Trish and Stacy object to Howard insulting blondes. Fink is stripped and Lillian wins. As you might expect, that just makes the fans hate the match even more.

HHH vs. Undertaker

The winner gets Lesnar at some point in the future. HHH jumps Undertaker as he gets off the bike and we’re ready to go in a hurry. They get inside with an early Pedigree attempt being blocked so Undertaker can hammer away in the corner. Old School gets two but HHH hits a jumping knee to the head. The very slow beating continues and we hit a HHH chinlock.

That shifts over to a sleeper in case we were going too fast for you. Back up and Undertaker hits him in the head a few times but the ref gets bumped. One of the worst big boots I’ve ever see (there was a good six inches between the boot and HHH’s face) sets up a chokeslam but here’s Lesnar for a distraction. HHH gets in a low blow and, after a belt shot from Lesnar, the pin and the title shot.

Rating: D. Boring match of course but that’s what you have to expect when two older guys get to be the focus instead of the new World Champion. This was really weak stuff from two guys who should be more than capable of doing something better. Lesnar felt like an afterthought here, which has been the case all night long.

Oh look: it’s Stephanie, who is all happy because she’s never allowed to lose any face. Lesnar is officially signed to Smackdown and the title is coming with him. So now she can change the rules of the Brand Split. Stephanie to Eric: “How do my peaches taste now?”

Overall Rating: D-. I don’t remember the last time I’ve seen two shows on back to back nights be such polar opposites. Last night was all about energy and entertainment while tonight was all about HHH vs. Undertaker and Stephanie vs. Bischoff with Lesnar being little more than a plot device in either. The best thing on the show was Dreamer vs. Van Dam while the rest was spent on stuff they knew wasn’t going to be interesting while having almost no focus on anything that mattered. In other words, it’s back to what Raw has been doing in recent months.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 19, 2002
Location: Norfolk Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Summerslam 2002 and there’s actually a big match set up here as the Rock isn’t defending the WWE World Title against HHH. The other question is what Brock Lesnar will be doing to mess with Rock tonight because the Brand Split doesn’t mean anything when we’re close to a major pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Undertaker to get things going. He’s never been one to make his political opinions public but he doesn’t take anything from anyone, just like America. Only in America can a man like him be himself because all he has to do is back it up with his fists. As you might expect, this turns into a rant on the Un-Americans and Test in particular. Sign: “Test Still Works Here?” Anyway, after more AMERICA IS AWESOME stuff, Test comes out on a motorcycle to Undertaker’s music. Test says Undertaker sucks so the fight is on. The Un-Americans run out but Booker T. and Goldust make the save. Booker sets up the six man.

Hardcore Title: Battle Royal

Tommy Dreamer, Johnny the Bull, Bradshaw, Spike Dudley, Crash Holly, Bubba Ray Dudley, Steven Richards, Jeff Hardy, Terri

Bischoff says the 24/7 Rule is done and this is a six minute match with the last person to get a pinfall being the champion. Dreamer is defending and Terri wisely runs away to start. Bradshaw gets in the Clothesline to pin Dreamer and we get a countdown clock for our convenience. The weapons are brought in and a kitchen sink shot to Bradshaw’s head gives Crash the title.

Like most hardcore matches there’s just nothing to talk about here as it’s just a bunch of weapons shots with nothing being built up anywhere. Crash tells Bubba to get the tables and of course goes through one. A kendo stick shot is enough to give Dreamer the title back. Bubba superplexes Tommy for two and everyone hits everyone else as time expires, giving Dreamer the title.

Rating: F. What am I supposed to say here? There’s almost no wrestling involved and it’s for a title no one cares about with Dreamer winding up leaving with the title anyway. The hardcore division died a long time ago and we’ve been stuck watching its dead body walking around for years now. Hopefully this wraps up soon.

Kane’s music hits and HIS PATH IS CHOSEN.

Stacy and Trish are catty to each other about various sexual escapades of the past. Bischoff comes in and says they’re here for sex appeal. Instead of a match, it’s going to be a bra and panties match in the mud.

Trish Stratus vs. Stacy Keibler

They’re in underwear and fighting in a mud pit. Trish is launched into the mud and Charles Robinson is pulled in with her. I’m not going to waste your time here so we’ll just skip to Trish winning off a rollup outside the pit.

Fink gets thrown into the mud as well.

Rock arrives and is given a package from Paul Heyman. After some Rogaine jokes and an introduction to the production woman who gives her the package (“How you doing? Dwayne Johnson. Good to meet you.”), Rock finds a bunch of pictures of a bloody Hulk Hogan as the mind games continue.

Here’s HHH with a clipboard for a chat. HHH isn’t going to fight Shawn at Summerslam until Michaels signs a release to prevent any legal liabilities. As for tonight though, Brock Lesnar needs to be paying attention to what happens to the Rock. Tonight’s match will be No DQ so Rock is getting softened up for Sunday. After that, HHH is coming for Lesnar and the title.

Chris Jericho of all people cuts this off (Where was he five minutes ago?) to say they have a lot in common. First of all, they both hate each other. Well at least there’s some continuity. As for Summerslam, they’re both fighting people WAY past their primes…and here’s Flair to attack Jericho with a trashcan.

Booker T./Goldust/Undertaker vs. Un-Americans

So it’s Texas vs. Canada. It’s a brawl on the floor until Christian and Undertaker start for a rather odd pairing. That switches over to the much more normal Christian vs. Booker and as you might expect, some Canadian cheating puts Booker in trouble. Christian rams him into the mat a few times before it’s back to Test for a chinlock. The pumphandle slam doesn’t work and a side kick puts Test down.

Goldust comes in and cleans house with the usual, including ten right hands to Christian in the corner. Of course that sets up Shattered Dreams with Undertaker running interference so the referee doesn’t see it. A clothesline puts Test on the floor and there’s the chokeslam to Storm. As the big guys fight outside, a Tag Team Title is brought in and Christian knocks Goldust silly for the pin.

Rating: C+. Not a bad match here actually though the ending was a bit messy. The other problem here of course is having Test vs. Undertaker which should be little more than a squash that doesn’t break five minutes. The Tag Team Title match should be fun though, especially if Booker and Goldust get to talk a bit more beforehand.

Video on Rock training, which is certainly for a match and not for a movie.

Bischoff gives Van Dam a pep talk when Big Show comes up to ask why he didn’t get the title shot. Van Dam: “Maybe because you’re a tool?” Show: “I’m a giant!” Van Dam: “Ok, you’re a giant tool.” Bischoff makes a match between them for later but doesn’t want Van Dam getting hurt. The title match is NOT on the line.

Flair says his announcement from three weeks ago is on hold because he’s ready for Jericho on Sunday. Cue Jericho to attack him with the trashcan again.

Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam fires off the kicks to start and knocks Big Show outside for even more of them because he doesn’t have much else to use on a giant. Show sends him into the steps and then throws the steps back inside. A chokeslam plants Van Dam and Show loads up the steps, only to have Bischoff send in Jamal and Rosey for the DQ.

Show is beaten down as you would expect.

Rock knows tonight is a No DQ match and sure HHH has beaten him before. He’s beaten HHH before too though, all the way back to when they were babies and HHH diaper was that censored wet. They were fighting back in the colonial days and the caveman days before that. That’s not exactly funny.

Anyway, Coach has a video tape from Paul Heyman, which Rock thinks is Heyman on a beach without anything on. For some reason he agrees to let it be shown and it’s a Lesnar highlight video. Rock agrees that Lesnar is great but the fact is very simple: Rock is walking out as champion. This was longer than a lot of Rock’s usual stuff but it was a good combination of comedy (albeit not funny comedy) and intense, which is the right balance.

HHH goes in to Bischoff’s office because Eric has received the fax from Shawn, who has agreed to wave the right to sue HHH. The match is officially unsanctioned and this takes WAY longer than it needs to.

Fozzy performs To Kill a Stranger with Lawler talking about how awesome they are the whole way through. After the song, Jericho rips on the Norfolk fans and offers to play another song, only to have a bloody Flair come in and clean house. Various guitars are broken and Summerslam is set up.

Rock is getting ready and ignores a phone call.

In the arena, Lesnar and Heyman arrive and of course it’s Paul calling Rock.

After a break, Bischoff has security guarding Heyman and Lesnar.

The Rock vs. HHH

Non-title, No DQ and for the last time ever. HHH tells Rock to just bring it and that means a bunch of right hands to the face. Rock knocks him over the top and a big clothesline in front of the additional security puts HHH down again. Back in and a cheap shot lets HHH take over and it’s time to start the slow offense. We hit the abdominal stretch as JR tries to make it seem like the most important hold in wrestling history. It doesn’t last all that long (shocking) so a double clothesline puts both guys down.

The spinebuster sets up the People’s Elbow but the bad ribs mean it’s a delayed two. HHH takes it back outside and sends Rock into the steps so it can be sledgehammer time. The referee gets decked (cue the no contest) but here’s Shawn to go after HHH. Brock takes Sweet Chin Music and goes out into the crowd. Rock gives chase and HHH brawls with Shawn to end the show.

Rating: C. Rock vs. HHH is always going to be worth a look even if they have the two angles being built up instead of really going anywhere. That’s not exactly surprising but given how this show has been all over the place, you kind of had to expect it. I’m not sold on having the same ticket buying idea two weeks in a row but at least they’re building something up.

Overall Rating: D+. Some of the wrestling helps a bit here but that first hour with the mud and the hardcore stuff was just a mess. Summerslam is getting stronger every day but it’s going to take a special performance to make the show into a good night. Rock vs. Lesnar and HHH vs. Shawn have my interest though and that’s the best thing that can happen with a big show like this.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 12, 2002
Location: Key Arena, Seattle, Washington
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

With less than two weeks to go before Summerslam, it might be nice to add a few matches to the card. Unless I’m missing something, all we have at the moment is Rock vs. Lesnar and HHH vs. Shawn Michaels. While those are both big matches, you need more than that to fill out a show. I mean, Shawn and HHH might disagree but not everyone thinks like they do. Let’s get to it.

Lesnar and Paul Heyman arrive, tickets in hand. You know, the exclusive contract thing kind of stops meaning anything when people keep showing up like this.

Opening sequence.

Eric Bischoff blames Stephanie McMahon for Lesnar and Heyman being here. You know, because Lesnar and Heyman are the kind of guys who are going to be in on some big promotion vs. promotion war.

Here’s HHH to open things up. All week long, people have been asking him how he could do that to his best friend, but Shawn never was his best friend. Insert your own GASP here. HHH just used Shawn to get to the top of the company, just like Shawn used HHH to stay at the top. He’s better than Shawn was on his best day and blames the fans for his actions.

HHH has crippled people in this ring before and he’ll do it again. One day Shawn is going to be watching the show in his wheelchair and he’ll show his son the man that kept him at home for good. Cue the Rock to say he can beat HHH up anytime but he wants Lesnar tonight. HHH asks Rock who he thinks he is so Rock reminds him who the Undisputed Champion is, meaning HHH can shut up.

A challenge is issued and HHH says he’d love to go. Rock: “Then go get the Rock a bologna sandwich because this doesn’t concern you.” The fight is on but Lesnar jumps to the apron for a distraction, setting up the Pedigree on Rock. This was WAY too long as HHH continues to be one of the most boring talkers in years.

Post break, Rock demands HHH tonight. Bischoff says he’ll try to make it happen.

Trish Stratus/Spike Dudley vs. Christopher Nowinski/Molly Holly

Before the match, Trish slaps the Fink for insulting Lillian. You know, because people remember that. The guys start things off as the fans want puppies. Nowinski slams Spike so Molly can cover for two (JR: “Probably an unfamiliar position for Molly.”) and slap her ex around a bit. Trish (who looks especially good in blue) comes in to make things a bit more fair until Chris pulls her down by the hair. Stratusfaction puts Nowinski down and it’s back to Spike, despite Trish having better luck against the male villain. Spike sends Molly into the Chick Kick but Nowinski grabs a spinning double underhook slam for the pin.

Rating: D. I’m not sure what the point of this one was but the important thing was toning the sex jokes WAY down. There were a few here and there though nothing compared to what it was before. I can live with a bad storyline as long as it doesn’t turn into something that embarrassing again.

We look back at 3 Minute Warning beating up Moolah and Mae Young.

Goldust stops Bischoff in the back and asks for a Tag Team Title shot. Bischoff gives them the shot at Summerslam, earning himself a leg visit from Minidust.

Here’s heel Fink to talk about how great he is and say Lillian got what was coming to her. She’s a ditz who swallowed her way into a job (seriously). Kane’s music hits….and no one comes out. Ok then.

Bischoff makes Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit for Summerslam due to Stacy stealing contracts from Stephanie on Smackdown to keep that nonsense going. The Hardys are annoyed about being ignored so Bischoff flips a coin to give Jeff a match against Van Dam tonight for the title shot against Benoit.

Booker T. vs. Lance Storm

Booker works on the arm to start but crotches himself on a side kick attempt. That means a kick to the ribs and an elbow to the neck until Booker gets the spinning sunset flip out of the corner. Storm suplexes him right back down and grabs a cravate for a bit. As is the custom, the rest hold triggers the comeback with Booker getting in his usual. Christian offers a distraction so Goldust pops Storm in the jaw, setting up the ax kick for the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine and that’s what you would expect from these two talented guys. It’s nice to see some teams put together into a feud and the Un-Americans could be just fine as a three man heel team for a long time. I’d have loved for this to get more time but that would mean less HHH talking time.

Test comes out for the beatdown but Undertaker makes the save. Minidust is here too and gets beaten up until we take a break. Back with Bischoff in the ring with Minidust announcing an eight man tag later tonight with the Un-Americans/HHH vs. Rock/Booker T./Goldust/Undertaker. As for Minidust though, Bischoff would like to see a Spinarooni. The entertainment ends, 3 Minute Warning comes in, JR and King are appalled. I think you know the drill by now. We’re still not done yet as Bischoff brings out Stacy Keibler so stripping and table dancing can ensue while Mini-Dust is taken away on a stretcher.

Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Ric Flair/Bubba Ray Dudley

Those are some odd teams and one of them would wind up being Tag Team Champions. Flair and Jericho start (thank goodness) and keep it basic with a backdrop to put Flair down as the high spot. It’s off to Bubba, who JR thinks is a big heavier than advertised. Show comes in and powerslams Bubba with ease, followed by some heavy chops.

Ric gets to try his luck and it’s about the same as Bubba with chops having little to no effect on the monster. It’s back to Jericho who misses a charge and crotches himself on the ropes. Everything breaks down and Bubba starts cleaning house with a side slam getting two on Chris. Flair takes Show into the crowd, leaving Jericho to hit Bubba low and grab the Walls for the submission.

Rating: C+. This was a bit better than I was expecting though that’s not really saying much. At least Jericho got the win over Bubba and Big Show didn’t horribly botch anything or injure anyone in the process and that’s a step up for him. Flair vs. Jericho has potential when they make the match for Summerslam and that’s something the card needs.

Post match Flair takes Jericho’s tights down but can’t get the Figure Four because the legs are tied together.

After a break, Jericho is so mad that he wants to face Flair at Summerslam. As a bonus, he’s going to perform with his band Fozzy right here next week.

Video on Shawn’s career in case you’re not familiar. In this case, that makes sense as if you started watching in the last four years or so, you’ve probably never seen him have a match.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Steven Richards

I’m not sure if the Hardcore Title is on the line here but they’re only allowed one weapon each. Dreamer has a kendo stick and Richards brings in a chair as the ECW chants start up. Richards starts fast by stealing the stick and unloading on Dreamer’s knee. That’s like, psychology and stuff. A spinebuster gets Dreamer out of trouble and he ties Richards up in the Tree of Woe for the baseball slide into the chair. Dreamer chairs him in the head for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen far worse and there was actually a little thinking in this one for a change. It’s still not good or anything but I’m no sure why this wasn’t for the title, especially if Dreamer was just going to win. If nothing else it’s better by not having someone run in and steal the title.

Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Dam

The winner gets Benoit for the Intercontinental Title at Summerslam. Lita is shown watching from the World. I’d share a fruit plate with her in New York City. They run the ropes to start with Van Dam missing the spinning kick to the face. Jeff puts him on the floor for the barricade running clothesline, only to have Rob kick him out of the air.

Back in and the top rope kick to the face drops Jeff and Rolling Thunder gets two. Jeff’s Whisper in the Wind gets the same but he takes WAY too much time going up. Rob kicks him in the head but the referee gets bumped, allowing Matt to come in and turn on his brother. The Five Star gives Rob the title shot.

Rating: C. This was watchable and I’m glad they’re splitting up the Hardys for the moment. It’s not like there are a ton of teams for them to feud with so let them move on and do something on their own. It seems that WWE has wanted to split them up for the better part of ever so it’s hardly the worst idea in the world.

On Smackdown: Lesnar vs. Rikishi!

Test gets Undertaker at Summerslam.

Bischoff yells at Kevin Dunn (who really does sound like Cornette’s imitation) for putting up that Smackdown teaser. Apparently that was a commercial, which should mean Bischoff and Raw made money. Eric isn’t happy and makes HHH vs. Rock for next week.

HHH/Un-Americans vs. The Rock/Booker T./Goldust/Undertaker

After some long entrances, Goldust cranks on Storm’s arm to start before handing it off to Booker for more of the same. A good looking superkick gets two on Lance and it’s off to Rock for one heck of a pop. Rock cleans house but makes the mistake of talking trash (Rock? Never.), allowing Storm to get in a few cheap shots to take over. HHH comes in and tries the jumping knee but Test knees Rock from the apron, leaving no one for HHH to hit. Sounds like lame revenge from 1999.

It’s enough for the tag off to Booker so Christian can hammer away. Mr. T. fights back until Storm’s great superkick allows the tag to Test. HHH gets two off a suplex and it’s back to Christian for a chinlock. Since he isn’t bright enough to do something original, Test comes in for a chinlock of his own. A side slam keeps Booker in trouble as the fans want Taker. I know this because they’re chanting WE WANT TAKER.

HHH puts on a sleeper but Booker gets in a side kick, allowing the VERY hot tag to Undertaker. Everything breaks down in a hurry and it’s Rock and Undertaker cleaning house. Test breaks up a double chokeslam attempt but Booker saves Undertaker from a pumphandle slam. Rock punches HHH out to the floor, ducks the big boot and Rock Bottoms Test for two with HHH making the save. Storm gets chokeslammed and Test boots Undertaker down to save Christian from the Last Ride and steal the pin.

Rating: B. That was a very hot finish with the charisma more than carrying some of the weaker talents in the match. They even had a good false finish on that Test near fall at the end. It’s a much better match than I was expecting from an eight man tag and that’s a good sign when Raw hasn’t exactly been great recently.

Overall Rating: C+. It’s amazing how much better a show gets when we don’t have five HHH vs. Shawn segments in two hours. There was a certain energy here to make the show a lot easier to sit through than in recent weeks. Summerslam is starting to take shape too and that’s the best thing that could possibly happen at this point. This was a good show with solid action and storyline advancement which is actually a rare combination in wrestling, as unfortunate as that may be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 5, 2002
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Summerslam continues to approach and that means we’re in need of some major matches. The big story around here though is someone attacking Shawn Michaels, sending HHH right back into caring about his former best friend who he just happens to beat up every now and then. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Shawn Michaels being attacked and everyone being a suspect, set to Rey Mysterio’s old WCW music for some reason.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Chris Jericho to get things going. This is his show now and only a certified genius like Eric Bischoff would bring him to Raw. After calling the fans losers (you’re better than that Chris), he says Bischoff gets the difference in talent between Jericho and Ric Flair. JR: “I just totally disagree with that.” HHH cuts him off because we haven’t seen these two fight enough this year. HHH suggests that Jericho had something to do with Shawn’s attack as a way to get back at HHH for the loss at Wrestlemania. That…..really doesn’t make sense but neither does most of what HHH says.

Jericho says it wasn’t him and brings up the problem with HHH’s theory: he just beat up Shawn a few weeks ago and now it would hurt HHH to have someone else attack Michaels? Jericho accuses HHH of being the attacker but HHH says he was in the ring when it happened. That’s not exactly beyond a reasonable doubt but I’ll take what I can get.

Anyway, HHH is going to find out who did it because he Pedigreed Shawn for his own good. HHH leaves and is quickly replaced by Rob Van Dam, whose chants annoy Jericho all over again. Rob is here for the official welcome to Raw and to ask Jericho what he’s been smoking. A match is set up due to Jericho getting annoyed at the RVD chants.

Big Show vs. Bubba Ray Dudley

Tables match. Show has slightly altered gear this week as the one piece swimsuit look now ends in shorts. So he’s wearing a woman’s one piece swimsuit but is self-conscious about his thighs. Bubba slugs away to start but gets caught in a good looking belly to belly. Some shots on the floor stagger Show for a few seconds until Show beats him down again. There’s a side slam to Bubba and it’s already time for a table.

Show kicks the table in half by mistake so Bubba folds it up and hits him in the head. That goes nowhere so here’s Trish to distract Show (the leather skirt helps with that), allowing Spike to come in and hit the big man with a football helmet. Show staggers into a flapjack through the table to give Bubba the win.

Rating: D-. As you might expect, Trish’s outfit was the only good thing about this one. I have no idea why Show is jobbing to Bubba Ray Dudley and a football helmet but I’m sure it’s going to result in Bubba getting a push because THAT’S what the world is waiting for. There’s something to be said for trying something new but there’s no real logic behind picking someone whose push is guaranteed to be a failure.

The Un-Americans run down America and the Undertaker. This involves talking about slaughtering innocent people in response to 9/11 and yeah, that’s too far. Like, way too far. Sgt. Slaughter comes in and offers to show them some real American aggression. This is going to be a very, very long night.

We look back at Moolah and Mae Young getting beaten down last week.

Hardcore Title: Tommy Dreamer vs. Bradshaw

Dreamer is defending and this seems to take JR by surprise as he says this was coming later in the show. They actually start fighting in the back, which is an interesting idea for the division for a change. Therefore, they’re almost immediately in the arena to make sure this is your run of the mill hardcore match. JR calls this a Raw exclusive and I wouldn’t brag about that.

Bradshaw beats him around the arena for a few near falls until Dreamer pulls him into the post. After some more weapons shots, Dreamer gets tossed with a middle rope fall away slam. A powerbomb gets two for Bradshaw and Dreamer gets the same off a shot to the head. Dreamer DDTs him on the floor for the pin and the title.

Rating: F. Nothing interesting and nothing new here, save for JR bragging about the division. It says a lot about the show when the announcers don’t seem to know what’s going on with the format. The division is so far beyond a waste of time at this point and I have no idea why so many of these people are still employed.

William Regal and Christopher Nowinski are talking about their tag match later when they run into Molly Holly and her new friend Victoria. Nowinski likes the idea of de-virginizing Molly and has to read the back of Victoria’s trunks to remember her name. Funny, but still rather disturbing.

Goldust complains to Booker T. about Mike Myers stealing his idea for Goldmember. As retaliation, Goldust introduces Minidust, who promptly enjoys Booker’s leg. Thankfully HHH (What am I saying?) comes in and accuses Booker of attacking Shawn. Booker isn’t happy.

Howard Finkel asks Bischoff if he can challenge Lillian Garcia to be the official ring announcer. Bischoff actually agrees because WE’RE HAVING A STORY ABOUT BATTLING RING ANNOUNCERS! Were the referees busy this week? Fink has a letter to deliver to Bischoff and it turns out to be from Stephanie, listing off various talents appearing on this week’s show. If nothing else we get to hear Fink do his big introductions voice which I’ll never get tired of hearing.

Kane is coming back. Oh yeah. He’s been gone.

Test vs. Sgt. Slaughter

Test kicks him in the face before the bell and there’s no match. Seriously that’s the whole thing.

Booker T./Goldust vs. William Regal/Christopher Nowinski

Goldust punches Nowinski in the face to start and follows up with a running hip attack because that’s how Goldust’s offense works. The bad guys start working on Goldust’s arm to take over as the fans tells Chris that Harvard sucks. Lawler starts talking about Molly wanting to sleep with Nowinski and those old awkward feelings start up again. Regal is finally sent into the corner for the hot tag off to Booker so house can be cleaned. Everything breaks down with both teams getting near falls off secondary finishers. An atomic drop into the ax kick puts Regal away.

Rating: C. This was your standard tag team formula match, making it by far and away the best thing on the show thus far. Booker and Goldust are a legitimately entertaining tag team and therefore they’re stuck spinning their wheels while HHH accuses Booker of attacking Shawn for his weekly table scraps.

HHH accuses the Un-Americans of attacking Shawn and hits a table with the hammer.

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Molly is on commentary and oh my this is going to get rough in a hurry. Twenty seconds into the match, Lawler flat out asks Molly if she’s a virgin. Lawler: “Do you have a fondness for cherries?” The match starts slowly and Victoria hurts her knee as the cherry jokes continue. Naturally it’s a ruse so Victoria can kick Trish in the face, which greatly pleases Molly. JR says it makes her sound “multi-orgasmic”. Trish chops away and now let’s talk about how far Spike got with Molly. A sunset flip is reversed and Victoria grabs the ropes for the pin.

Rating: F. This has nothing to do with the match. Lawler was as disturbing as I’ve ever heard him here and JR didn’t even do much to stop him. There’s no excuse for this story to exist and it’s absolutely disgusting. I know Katie Vick is still coming up this year but this might be even worse as it’s about a real person and is supposed to be from a face.

Show is annoyed at HHH accusing him too.

Tag Team Titles: Hardy Boys vs. Un-Americans

Storm and Christian are defending. Matt and Christian slug it out to start before it’s off to Jeff for the high pitch pop. The heels take over with some double teaming but Jeff scores with the Whisper in the Wind. The hot tag brings in Matt for the Twist of Fate but Christian gets in a cheap shot to give Storm two. Jeff dives off the barricade to take Christian down again and the Swanton connects, only to have Christian pull the referee out for the DQ.

Rating: D. Another horribly uninteresting match here with the Hardys not exactly putting in a ton of effort. The Un-Americans are fine for a basic heel team and they can wrestle a good enough match but you need more than four minutes against an unmotivated team. Nothing to see here but at least Jeff is getting a response.

Test goes after the Hardys until Undertaker makes the save. The Un-Americans bail so Undertaker steals a police motorcycle and gives chase.

Here’s Bischoff to deal with the Howard and Lillian issue, which the fans didn’t seem to know existed. First of all though, Eric promises a surprise for HHH later on. I’m so thrilled. Anyway, the announcers take turns plugging the new movie XXX and of course we see a trailer. Finkel implies that Lillian enjoys servicing multiple sailors and this time he’s the heel, unlike ANYONE who makes fun of Molly for being a virgin. Bischoff sends out 3 Minute Warning to destroy Lillian because this is supposed to be entertaining.

Chris Jericho vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho starts fast and hammers away in the corner but gets monkey flipped for two. Seriously who goes for a cover after a monkey flip? A slingshot flip dive puts Jericho down again until he grabs a release German suplex to really take over. Jericho goes for the turnbuckle pad but settles for a spinning kick to the face instead. The Lionsault hits knees and Van Dam’s Rolling Thunder is good for two. Rob reverses the Walls attempt into a small package for two and there’s the ref bump. Chris chairs him down but Flair comes in with a chair to Jericho’s head, setting up the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: B-. Match of the night by far here and that’s something that this show was dying for at this point. Flair vs. Jericho should be a lot of fun and Van Dam can do….something for Summerslam. The match was pretty good but this show is just so far beyond saving that it doesn’t matter at this point.

Bischoff is on his way to the ring with a surprise for HHH. This is perhaps the most unnecessary scene I can remember in wrestling this year.

Here’s Bischoff to introduce HHH for his big surprise. The surprise is a live feed from San Antonio so HHH can talk to Shawn. They’re cool at the moment and it seems that the Pedigree is forgotten. We get to hear them make up on air until HHH finally gets to the point by asking if Shawn remembers anything.

That’s a big negative so HHH promises to find out who did it. We have a break in the case though: the Greensboro police have sent Shawn some security footage, which he hasn’t actually watched yet. We see the video, it’s really blurry, Shawn enhances it, and it’s HHH. I mean, you could see that before it was enhanced but let’s stretch this out even longer. HHH admits it (well he kind of had to) and apparently his motive was to show that Shawn needed HHH’s protection. From HHH you mean?

Anyway the doctors have told Shawn that he’ll make a 100% recovery. Say by….Summerslam? HHH: “What are you going to do? Talk me to death?” Shawn wants to fight at Summerslam, even though HHH asks what happens if Shawn can’t take care of his family anymore. Michaels doesn’t really care and the fight is set for Summerslam to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. This is a rather interesting case where I remember the ending very differently. At the time, I LOVED the idea of Shawn coming back to face HHH in a fight at Summerslam but that’s all I remember about about the segment and really the show in general. While the announcement was a good idea and came off well, almost EVERYTHING else was a mess and really kept everything from having a chance.

Before we get to the rest of this mess, let’s look at the big angle. Now keep in mind that HHH knew the whole idea throughout the show. I get the idea of wanting to put up a front but what in the world was the point of doing that if you’re going to do the big reveal just a week later? Set this up, wait a few weeks and THEN do the HHH reveal. Either that or just cut out the whole Pedigree thing from a few weeks ago. What’s the point of having HHH run around for a week and waste our time? Did he really think he was going to get away with it? I know he has delusions of grandeur but this was a stretch even for him.

That leaves us with the rest of the show, which included a battle of the ring announcers, a horrible table match, an even worse hardcore match, Minidust and finally, an absolutely unnecessary and deplorable batch of commentary during the Trish vs. Victoria match. There’s a difference between bad wrestling and a ridiculous waste of time with this one being far more of the latter than the former.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MQKDV5O

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 29, 2002
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re officially in the HHH Era on Raw but unfortunately he doesn’t really have a lot to do yet. Last week HHH debuted on the show and turned heel by beating up Shawn Michaels, but there’s absolutely no way that’s going to lead to a match anytime soon of course. With about a month left before Summerslam, the card is in need of some matches in a hurry. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Shawn and HHH from last week, which is almost the only thing worth talking about. At least it wasn’t Stephanie vs. Eric again.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Bischoff to get things going and he’s already talking about Stephanie. She stole Lesnar last week and this week he’s got a knockout of his own. Here are the newest members of the Raw roster: Christian, Lance Storm and Test, the Un-Americans. So….what about that whole building up tag teams over on Smackdown? Total waste of time for the sake of Stephanie vs. Bischoff? Good to know.

Storm points to the upside flag Test is carrying, which stands for America being in distress. Let’s look at some of those American icons, such as Elvis Presley, a fat drug addict who died on the toilet. We hear similar complaints about Marilyn Monroe, Babe Ruth and John Wayne (JR: “NOW WAIT A MINUTE!”). The champs don’t think much of America, save for Bischoff of course.

A fired up Shawn Michaels of all people cuts them off and says he wants to exercise his rights as an American citizen to beat HHH from one side of this arena to the other. Shawn doesn’t want to hear from some Canucks who are still mad that he beat up Bret Hart. If Bischoff doesn’t bring HHH to him, he’ll go find HHH himself. Storm says Shawn will get what’s coming to him. Did Shawn really need to come out here at this point? It’s not like these segments couldn’t be split up.

Bischoff is talking to Eddie Guerrero when a messenger comes up and says a woman in a limo has sent for him. Eric isn’t interested and says she can wait. I’m thinking…..Linda?

Booker T. vs. Eddie Guerrero

Booker starts fast with a flapjack for an early near fall as Lawler wants to know what happened to Booker’s bad back. Fair question actually. Eddie remembers it as well and forearms Booker in the back to take over. A one armed camel clutch keeps Booker in trouble and it’s time for some Spanish trash talk.

Eddie unhooks the turnbuckle pad and it’s time for the comeback, including a clothesline for two. As expected, Booker sends Eddie pretty close to the buckle (it wasn’t clear if he knew about the pad being gone) and hits an ax kick to the side of the head (Eddie wasn’t bent over) for the pin.

Rating: C. The ending was a bit off but the match got a little more time than usual and let Booker get a win instead of losing all over again. There’s quite the midcard being built around here and they actually have a title to fight over. If one of them could, I don’t know, head towards the main event, things might get interesting for a change.

Moolah and Mae Young are in the limo.

Shawn goes HHH hunting but finds Booker and Goldust instead. Booker isn’t cool with Shawn throwing him out of the NWO but Shawn says it was business. That sounds like an invitation to a fight and Goldust can dig that. Sucka.

Trish Stratus/Bubba Ray Dudley vs. William Regal/Molly Holly

Rematch from last week but Regal is injured, meaning we have a replacement.

Trish Stratus/Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Big Show/Molly Holly

Lawler slips up and implies that Molly is good looking before remembering to be a face and pretend she’s overweight. Molly takes Trish down to start but Big Show misses an elbow, meaning we get the Show vs. Bubba match that we were all waiting for. Bubba’s bad arm gives him away though and it’s Show taking over without too much trouble.

The women come in again with Trish getting two off the Chick Kick, allowing JR to mention that Molly doesn’t spend too much time on her back. Molly tries to go after Bubba, earning her a quick dance. Show saves What’s Up but takes some steps to the head, leaving Molly to get caught in a Doomsday Device for the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here, aside from some bad jokes at Molly’s expense. I’m still not sure where we’re going with Trish/Bubba but they’ve managed to come up with worse ideas before. I’m also looking forward o getting away from Trish vs. Molly because even Lawler is having issues remembering his stupid motivations here.

Show cleans house and sets up a table but Trish saves Bubba with some distracting chair shots.

Post break, Show yells at Shawn and mild threats are issued.

Ric Flair gives Jeff Hardy a pep talk when Bischoff comes in. Flair doesn’t think Jeff should risk his life for ratings every week, including in a hardcore match tonight with Bradshaw. On top of that, Ric has an announcement for later tonight. Moolah and Mae Young come in for a book plug and generally unfunny shenanigans. Bischoff will let them plug the book in the ring.

Hardcore Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Bradshaw

Jeff is challenging and now billed from just North Carolina for the cheap pop. Bradshaw knocks him around to start and gets two off a very hardcore elbow drop. A trashcan shot to the back looks to set up a powerbomb off the steps but Jeff backdrops his way out instead. It’s ladder time because that’s all Jeff knows how to do anymore. The ref gets bumped to keep this going and Bradshaw is knocked off the ladder. A Swanton in Bradshaw’s general area gives Jeff the pin and the title.

Rating: D. I hit you, you hit me, the finish sucks and does nothing for anyone. Hardy wins another meaningless title to go with his recent European Title win, meaning he’s likely losing this one by the end of the month at the latest. If nothing else I hope he does so we don’t have to see Jeff’s personalized title with his “artwork” included.

Johnny the Bull and Tommy Dreamer win the title.

Regal was faking his injury and goes off to get a massage. Benoit comes out of the green room and says he doesn’t need luck.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is challenging. A fight over a wristlock goes nowhere as the announcers talk about Flair having a big announcement for later tonight. Benoit gets tired of the posing and kicks Van Dam in the ribs as the conversation moves on to a Shawn/HHH discussion. Rob kicks him in the face to set up a big dive over the top to really wake the crowd up.

Back in and Rob does his splits to set up a monkey flip, only to have Benoit score with a basement dropkick to the head. Van Dam goes shoulder first into the post as it’s time to set up for the Crossface. Benoit cranks on the arm and cuts off the champ’s comeback by sending him hard back to the mat.

The stepover kick to the face drops Benoit though and Rolling Thunder is good for two. Rob misses the Five Star and that means it’s time for the Crossface. A rope is reached but Benoit grabs the hold all over again. Van Dam rolls away but Benoit throws his feet on the ropes for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Good stuff here and it’s a positive sign to have Benoit already with a title again so soon after his return. Van Dam will be back and you can almost guarantee a rematch from here. The wrestling was solid too with the story making sense all the way through. The arm work even played into the ending with Benoit going from the Crossface to the pin.

Shawn tells the door attendant to let HHH know that he’s waiting in the parking lot. Big Show is watching.

Moolah and Mae Young are in the ring with Bischoff saying they have three minutes. Bischoff actually dozes off as Moolah talks about some stories. Mae almost gets in a fight with Moolah….and here comes 3 Minute Warning. The women take a beating and NO ONE COMES OUT TO HELP THEM. Bischoff names the monsters as Jamal and Rosey.

After a break, with Mae being carted out, Bischoff says that when he snaps his fingers, things happen. Cue Undertaker to say this finger snapping thing could be interesting. Christopher Nowinski interrupts and makes the mistake of insulting the Undertaker. Let’s have a match.

Undertaker vs. Christopher Nowinski

Chris tries to talk his way out of this but gets sent into the corner. Undertaker charges into an elbow in the corner and Chris Harvard (JR’s name) hammers away, only to get caught with Old School. The Last Ride wraps it up quick.

Post match the Un-Americans come out for the beatdown, including a mostly messed up Conchairto. It’s so bad that they have to try a second time and still only barely graze him. How hard can it be to hit someone in the head?

After a break, the Un-Americans say they have one more piece of business.

Rock implies Coach slept with a cow and Coach makes the mistake of going down the rabbit hole. This prompts Rock to go into the full story, capped off sound effects and saying Coach likes to stick microphones up cows’ rectums. Coach: “Rock it was just one night.” Rock: “WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA WHOA! THE ROCK WAS KIDDING! Hey is that a cow over there?” Coach: “Where???”

Anyway, Rock is ready to give Brock Lesnar the beating he deserves but first, he’s facing Ric Flair in Flair Country. Rock talks about how big it’s going to be, says IF YA SMELL, waits for JR to talk about the match, struts on and off screen, and then says IS COOKIN. This was great in the way that only Rock can make something great.

Here’s HHH to address Shawn. It was HHH’s idea to have Shawn as his manager so they could take over the WWE together. Shawn doesn’t understand that his time is over and it’s not about him anymore. All the injuries have caught up with him and last Monday was a slap of reality in Shawn’s face. Shawn’s career is over and he needs to just accept it and be HHH’s manager. A producer gets up on the apron and tells HHH something, which sends him running to the back.

We come back from a break with wrestlers around an unconscious and bloody Shawn. HHH demands help for his buddy and Shawn is taken away in an ambulance. Bischoff suggests that HHH was behind it and we get a censored F Bomb.

Ric Flair vs. The Rock

Non-title and Rock requested the match. They trade armdrags to start with Flair actually sending the champ out to the floor. Back in and Rock sends him into the corner before copying the strut, earning himself some Flair chops. Rock is put on the floor again as this is almost one sided so far.

It’s WAY too early for the Figure Four though and Rock is soundly booed by the North Carolina crowd. The spinebuster looks to set up the People’s Elbow but Flair grabs the leg, only to have the Figure Four countered into the Sharpshooter. A poke to the eye cuts Rock off and NOW the Figure Four goes on in the middle of the ring. Rock is in the ropes quickly enough and the Rock Bottom puts Flair away.

Rating: C-. Perfectly fine match here with Rock letting Flair get to show off in his home state. It’s not like anyone is expecting anything great out of Flair at this point and he certainly didn’t look bad. This was all it needed to be and the fans were into it, though it’s pretty clearly just there to set up whatever Flair’s announcement is going to be.

We get the handshake and the hand raise so Rock can leave Flair to make his announcement. Flair can barely get a word out though before Chris Jericho of all people comes out. A chair shot to the head drops Flair as I’m wondering how Rock didn’t hear Jericho’s very loud music setting this up. Jericho says Raw is Jericho to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. It’s amazing what some structure and goals can do for a show. Well that and having a far better built midcard with some matches and acts actually getting some time. It’s far from perfect and there’s still a lot of work that needs to be done, but this is so much better than the disaster that Raw used to be that it’s kind of amazing. Totally watchable show this week, which I couldn’t imagine saying just two months ago.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book, KB’s Complete Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume V at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Smackdown
Date: July 25, 2002
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s another big night for Smackdown as we have the in ring debut of Rey Mysterio as well as the Smackdown debut of Brock Lesnar, who Stephanie stole this past Monday. We’re also getting ready for Summerslam and that’s the best thing that could happen after a rather dreadful summer. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video of Stephanie introducing the show in a seizure inducing moment. See, Stephanie is all hip and cool and caters to the youth of the country with her hipness.

Opening sequence.

Kurt Angle vs. Mark Henry

Henry shoves him around to start and just glares him Kurt for trying a suplex. Kurt is sat on top where Henry pats him on the head for fun. A missed charge allows Kurt to hit the first suplex and really take over. Another powerslam puts Angle down but here’s Lesnar to F5 Henry for the DQ. There was no one but Angle to be put in this spot right?

Angle follows Lesnar to the back and asks what was up with that. Brock was just trying to help Kurt out after Angle blew it at Vengeance. Now that Brock is here, Kurt’s time as the top star on Smackdown is over.

Stacy Keibler goes in to see Stephanie and offers to help her in any way possible. Stephanie has her answer the door, which is a flower delivery from Eric Bischoff, who will be here tonight. The vase is thrown against the wall.

Reverend D-Von vs. Big Valbowski

Hardcore Holly is in Val’s corner. Venis starts fast with a clothesline and big boot but both of them fall out to the floor in a crash. Back in and Venis gets two off a fisherman’s suplex with Batista making the save. The partners get in a fight on the floor, leaving Val to grab a Blue Thunder Bomb for the pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as D-Von’s reverend gimmick has basically stopped save for the theme song (which is still awesome). Venis and Holly are fine for a low level veteran team but I can’t picture them going any further than a single title shot and maybe not even on pay per view.

Batista cleans house post match. Just let him leave D-Von already and go after someone bigger.

On Stephanie’s orders, Stacy sends security after Edge.

Lance Storm and Christian are ready for their first title defense against the Rock and Hulk Hogan. That’s quite the step up.

Stephanie catches up with Edge, who assures her he isn’t leaving to sign with Raw. Instead he was going to the production truck with a tape. The tape starts rolling and it’s a countdown clock with about an hour and thirty seven minutes on it. That’s how long there is left in the show and in that time, Edge is going to get his hands on Chris Jericho inside a cage. Wait WHAT? It’s a video tape that seems to start with 97 minutes left and Edge got it into the tape player EXACTLY ON TIME??? Including being stopped by security and talking to Stephanie? She had to write this idea. Like, she had to. Only Stephanie could see this working.

Angle is on the phone with someone named Eric. It’s going to be his brother isn’t it?

Rikishi vs. Albert

Albert bicycle kicks him in the head at the bell for no cover. A few corner splashes set up a Vader Bomb for two but Rikishi gets in a DDT. The running hip attack in the corner sets up a Stinkface, followed by the Rump Shaker for the pin. What in the world is up with pushing Rikishi like this?

Stephanie (yes again) calls Angle and demands an explanation via voicemail.

Remember last week when we saw a video saying Rey Mysterio debuts in a week? Everything is still on schedule.

Tag Team Titles: The Rock/Hulk Hogan vs. Lance Storm/Christian

The Canadians are defending. Hogan and Storm start things off and guess what the fans are chanting. Storm gets in a clothesline to start and is quickly pinballed back and forth by right hands from the challengers. Wait, we need to stop and look at a worried Stephanie. Ok now that we’re done with that, let’s talk about how worried she is! Rock gets double teamed for a bit until a Samoan drop drops Storm like a Samoan.

Test breaks up the People’s Elbow though and you can hear the energy come out of the building. Back in and Test cuts off another comeback, followed by a superkick to give Storm two. Hogan comes in for the save but gets distracted to the floor by Test. Therefore there’s no one for Rock to tag so he waits about ten seconds and makes the hot tag on the second attempt. A double belly to back gets two on Hogan but it’s Hulk Up time, only to have Lesnar come in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Not the worst here but Rock could have been almost anyone. You really don’t need to tie this in to the Summerslam match as the idea is more about treating Brock like a monster. The match was as good as an average tag team facing two of the biggest stars of all time was going to be.

Lesnar orders Hogan’s limo driver to take himself and Heyman instead.

The announcers recap the talent stealing story. Would it kill Cole to wear a suit?

John Cena thinks Test has ugly teeth and gets slapped in the mouth for it.

Stephanie comes up to Jericho and it turns into an ad for the new Fozzy CD.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

I remember thinking that it was a different Mysterio since he had the mask back on. Rey starts fast with his variety of headscissors (smart way to go) but Chavo sends him into the corner to take over. We hit an abdominal stretch for a bit before Chavo drives him back first into the apron. Rey has enough of being on defense and busts out a big flip dive to knock Chavo silly. A sweet cradle gets two but a Gory Bomb plants Rey for the same. That goes nowhere so it’s the 619 (no pop yet and Tazz calls it the Six Nineteen) into the West Coast Pop (no name either) to give Rey his first win.

Rating: C. This could have been better by letting Rey fly around more but this is WAY past the point where he blew the doors off the place. That being said, he’s miles better than almost anyone in the division and it was another big name from WCW that could actually mean something in the future. In other words, it’s potential, which isn’t something you can never have enough of in wrestling.

In the back, Test lays Mysterio out.

John Cena vs. Test

Cena goes right for him to start but a hard knee to the ribs slows him down. A quick DDT gets Test out of trouble but let’s talk about Bischoff again! A Jericho style flying forearm drops Test again and the ProtoBomb gets two. Back up and Test tries a powerbomb but gets sunset flipped to give Cena another upset.

Rating: C-. I’m a Test fan (I think there are three of us) so I liked this a bit more than I should have. That being said, Cena really, really needs a finisher outside of a fluke rollup. That’s all he’s used to win so far and while it’s not great, the ProtoBomb would be fine for a finisher until he gets something better. Cena is good enough at the moment but he needs some upgrades.

Test kicks him in the face post match.

Stephanie calls Angle and basically rips him apart for not calling her back. If he’s going to Raw with Eric, the least he could do is tell her face to face. It’s going to be his brother isn’t it?

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Inside a cage and this is actually joined in progress. You don’t see that too often in a big match. Jericho goes head first into the cage and Edge rips some skin off his chest with chops. A spear up against the cage makes things worse but Jericho sidesteps a second attempt to send Edge into the steel. That means a nasty cut on Edge’s head and a sleeper drop gets two.

Back up and Edge ducks another charge to send Jericho into the cage but Edge can’t get out quite yet. A sitout gordbuster (not an inverted powerbomb Tazz) gets two on Jericho as they’re already trading big moves, though there’s not a lot of drama yet. Cole: “You’ve got to give the businesswoman Stephanie McMahon a lot of credit!” Well of course we do! We haven’t talked about her all match and just to be clear, she’s a totally professional businesswoman and our role model.

Edge escapes the Walls so Jericho goes for the door, giving us the fairly standard “heel grabs the chair right next to the door” spot. A very loud chair shot gets two with Edge’s spear connecting for the same. Both guys head to the top for a super bulldog from Jericho and it’s time for a double breather. Jericho goes up again and gets pulled right back down with a super electric chair for a nasty looking crash. Both guys are down but it’s Edge getting up over the top for the escape before Jericho can get out the door.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t the best cage match in the world as there wasn’t enough build to the big spot trading section. Edge going over clean is the only call here and now he’s beaten Angle and Jericho in back to back feuds. That’s how you build someone up and it’s a good sign when the fans are responding to someone rising up the ranks like this.

Post match the Un-Americans come in for the beatdown. Cena tries to make a save but instead it’s Mysterio diving off the cage to take everyone down.

Bischoff is in the parking lot so HERE COMES STEPHANIE! She tries to get into the limo while he talks about knocking Stephanie out. The limo pulls away with Eric laughing along with someone we can’t see. Angle comes up and Stephanie is thrilled because IT WAS HIS BROTHER ON THE PHONE! GEE! SHOCKING INDEED!  Stephanie wants to know who is in the limo to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I know I keep harping on this but Stephanie is already killing these shows. It feels like we have to stop and see whatever nonsense she’s up to almost every five minutes and it boils down to this Raw vs. Smackdown show. What that ignores though is the fact that you can watch both shows and not miss anything. The pay per views give you the payoff to all the feuds and the TV shows are on the same nights.

Why should I care if Bischoff and Stephanie are stealing talent from the other show? It doesn’t help that it’s treated as the biggest story in the company because that means we don’t really have an option other than watching As Stephanie’s World Turns. The wrestling wasn’t bad but it really feels like it’s a few miles behind the big story, which isn’t interesting.