Monday Night Raw
Date: September 6, 1999
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than three weeks away from Unforgiven and HHH is still trying to avoid facing various people at the show. This includes the Rock and Mankind, who managed to beat HHH and Shane McMahon to retain the Tag Team Titles last week on Smackdown. Other than that, Chris Jericho has turned Howard Finkel into a nut, with Ken Shamrock not being happy. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Tag Team Titles: The Rock/Mankind vs. Kane/X-Pac

Rock and Mankind are defending but before we get going (and before anyone else can get here), Rock needs to mock Kane for being all excited over being able to speak. We even get an impression of Kane using his voice box, plus a suggestion for where Kane can put it (for easy storage). Mankind comes out, sends out some get well wishes to someone named Brian (that would likely be Brian Hildebrand, who was diagnosed with cancer around this time) and says it’s great to be back in Harvard (he’s trying).

Hold on again though as there’s no X-Pac due to Kane interfering in X-Pac’s match on Smackdown, so Kane is going to do it alone. Hold it yet again though as here is HHH…and he’s going to be Kane’s partner. Cue Chyna with a sledgehammer as Kane hammers on Rock to start.

Rock manages to come back with a Russian legsweep for two and it’s off to Mankind. Kane hammers away in the corner (and says “yeah” to Mankind about something) before clotheslining him in the corner. HHH’s tag request is ignored though, allowing Mankind to grab a Texas piledriver. Kane is fine enough to kick Rock in the face before HHH tags himself in. Then Kane tags himself right back in, only to have HHH hit Kane in the back with the sledgehammer. The Rock Bottom into the People’s Elbow retains the titles.

Rating: C-. Well that was….we’ll go with busy, as they packed in a storyline with the X-Pac absence, Chyna coming out, the sledgehammer, HHH wanting to be Kane’s partner for whatever reason, and a match into the first twelve or so minutes of the show. That’s a lot even for a 1999 Raw, and somehow Kane takes a pin out of the whole ordeal. Granted it was out of a sledgehammer shot and the Rock’s double finishers, but it still feels weird to see Kane getting pinned in about three and a half minutes.

JR: “What kind of human being would hit another man from behind with a sledgehammer?” King: “Uh, HHH?”

Post match Kane sits up but HHH sledgehammers him in the chest a few times. Cue Undertaker and Big Show and HHH leaves as allegiances are questioned. Kane even walks off on his own, making sledgehammer shots all the more worthless by the step.

Jacqueline isn’t worried about Jeff Jarrett wanting to use her as an example tonight. She’ll slap all three dumb blondes tonight (Debra and Miss Kitty being the others).

Jeff Jarrett vs. Jacqueline

Non-title and Miss Kitty (but not Debra) is here with Jarrett. Before the match, Jarrett tells Chyna to watch from the back, because he’s going to show what happens when a woman is in his world. Jacqueline jumps on his back to start with the choking but is quickly flipped and stomped down. The fans want Debra but have to settle for Jarrett sending Jacqueline into the corner for more stomping. A clothesline makes it worse and the Figure Four finishes Jacqueline fast.

Post match Jarrett hits Jacqueline with the guitar. Commentary is AGHAST.

Val Venis isn’t happy with Steve Blackman jumping him from behind last week and threatens revenge.

Edge and Christian vs. Acolytes

For the #1 contendership. The Acolytes start the brawl before the bell and we settle down to Faarooq beating on Christian in the corner. Faarooq misses a headbutt though and it’s quickly off to Bradshaw to beat up Christian. Edge manages a takedown and hands it off to Christian to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and Bradshaw powerbombs the heck out of Christian. There’s no referee so Bradshaw loads up another, allowing Edge to come in off the top with a missile dropkick to give Christian the pin.

Rating: C. They didn’t have much time here but Edge and Christian continue their rise up the ladder. You can see the talent there and they’re getting more polished every time they’re around. Throw in the Dudleys debuting last week on Smackdown and the new generation of the tag division is starting to come together.

In the back, Edge and Christian are ready for the Rock and Mankind when the Acolytes come in. Cue the Dudley Boyz to jump the Acolytes from behind though and beat them down.

We get GTV where Val Venis and Big Show are in the restroom and Venis wonders why Show is called “big”. Venis is quickly laid out.

Meat is sick of being called Meat and says his real name is Shawn Stasiak. Tonight he is here to carry on the legacy of his father but here is the Mean Street Posse to say his dad sucked. The Posse beats him down (that’s a weird thing to see).

Here is Val Venis to call out Big Show. We see Undertaker telling Big Show to go deal with this so here is Show for the brawl. Venis unloads in the corner and fires off a bunch of right hands but gets shoved away. We have a referee in the ring but there’s no bell as this is just a fight. Show fights back but Venis kicks the leg out, only to get pulled out of the air. The chokeslam is good for the pin as I guess this was a match, minus the start that is.

Post match Steve Blackman runs in to beat on Venis with a kendo stick.

The Dudley Boyz are not worried about attacking the Acolytes. D-Von lists off the commandments but here are the Acolytes to jump them right back.

Lilian Garcia is ready to introduce the next match but here is the Fink to interrupt. Cue Ken Shamrock to chase after the Fink but Chris Jericho (and the crowd ROARS) pops up on screen to say this is a lot more real than the Ultimate Fighting Championships. They can go face to face on Smackdown, which works for Shamrock.

Here are HHH and Chyna for a chat. HHH talks about how great he is and how many things he has done. He put Mankind out of action for three months and beat him for the WWF Title. Then he took the Rock to school, so Linda McMahon needs to stay out of their business. Cue Billy Gunn to interrupt, saying HHH recruited him into DX to avoid the beating Gunn could give him. Gunn calls him an a****** and his music starts playing but cuts off as they’re not done yet. After the main event is set, the music plays again.

Mean Street Posse vs. Test/Pat Patterson/Gerald Brisco

Terri Runnels is here with the Posse and joins commentary. Patterson and Brisco get beaten down before Test comes out but here he comes to wreck the Posse in short order. Powerbombs abound and here is Shawn Stasiak to cut off Rodney from leaving. Another powerbomb and one heck of a top rope elbow finishes for Test. That elbow was nuts as Rodney was over halfway across the ring.

Hollys vs. New Brood

Gangrel is here with the Hardys and Crash has a scale. Hold on though as the Hardys have to be weighed before the match. Hardcore doesn’t think they weigh enough but Jeff dropkicks him down to start fast. We settle down to Matt slamming Crash and dropping the middle rope legdrop for two.

Jeff comes in with a springboard moonsault for two and a double legdrop gives Matt the same. The chinlock goes on for a bit until Crash manages to headscissors Jeff into the corner. Hardcore comes in and gets taken down by the Hardys, with Crash coming in for the save. Everything breaks down and Hardcore hits the Falcon Arrow on Jeff for the pin.

Rating: C. For some reason this match got almost as much time as anything else on the show so far. The Hollys have a little something with their tough guy/goofy guy combination and it is working so far. At the same time the New Brood has me wondering what the point of Gangrel is, as the Hardys seem like they could be just fine on their own.

Post match the Hollys stay on them but the lights go out, meaning Crash gets a blood bath. Hardcore: “Do you know how funny you look right now?” And they fight again.

Undertaker and Big Show challenge Rock and Mankind to a Buried Alive match for the Tag Team Titles on Smackdown.

Here is Al Snow, albeit in his Avatar gear (a masked martial arts guy). Snow: “SHAZAM!” Snow puts the mask on and says he’s here to protect the WWF from evil. Then he wakes up and says he’s in the genie pants. Snow: “The last time I wore this, you could have stuck a magnet up my a** and dragged me through Fort Knox and I still wouldn’t have drawn money.” He drops to his knees and starts barking before running over to the commentary table to write something on a legal pad. Then he runs off, still barking.

Rock promises to take Big Show’s 59lb head and stick it up Undertaker, who has a bunch of Mickey Mouse tattoos. Mankind gets serious and is ready to fight too. I remember this promo from when it aired live and finding it hilarious. Maybe not so much these days.

Another GTV shows Marianna on the phone, begging someone to talk to Chaz.

D’Lo Brown vs. Steve Blackman

European Champion Mark Henry, with a pair of ladies, joins commentary, much to Lawler’s delight. Blackman starts kicking away but gets dropped for the quick legdrop. Some choking on the ropes has Brown in more trouble and we hit the chinlock. Brock fights up and grabs the Sky High but stops to yell at Henry. Cue Val Venis to deck Blackman, allowing Brown to hit the Low Down for the pin.

Rating: C-. Managing to get in a pair of feuds into a three minute match is rather impressive, albeit a bit excessive to put it mildly. Brown vs. Henry is fine enough for a midcard match, though Venis vs. Blackman isn’t quite as interesting. It just wasn’t much of a match here, but Brown is one of the smoother workers around at this point.

Post match Henry wrecks Brown.

Ivory is ready to hurt Tori in the first ever women’s hardcore match. Tori, in a shirt and not much else, jumps her and has to be carried off.

Women’s Title: Ivory vs. Tori

Ivory is defending under hardcore rules and this is joined in the bathroom with Tori throwing soap. They go into the shower, where Jacqueline has to grab a towel and run off. Ivory pours shampoo in Tori’s eyes and washes her mouth out with soap. Then they fight into a men’s locker room with Tori sending her over a table. Ivory smashes a mirror over Tori’s head to retain. Lilian Garcia: “The Women’s Wrestling Federation Champion is Ivory!”

Rating: D. This was an excuse to have Tori brawling in very limited clothing with gratuitous camera shots. I get the appeal, but this kind of thing gets old in a hurry, as it’s just there for the most obvious reasons. Granted it doesn’t help that women’s wrestling means absolutely nothing and having this didn’t help things, but can they at least be less obvious with it?

Post match Ivory rips open the back of Tori’s shirt and burns her with an iron.

Chyna is told she’s barred from ringside for the main event, but she’s just going to forget that Earl Hebner told her that.

WWF Title: HHH vs. Billy Gunn

HHH, with Chyna, is defending….or at least in theory, as Chyna is ejected. Gunn comes to the ring and stares at Chyna on the way out. HHH tries to jump him in the aisle and they start fast, with Gunn stomping away at ringside. Gunn takes him inside for the opening bell but HHH scores with the Fameasser. The jumping knee puts Gunn down again and it’s a posting to keep him in trouble.

Back in and HHH cranks on the arm with a variety of armbars. Gunn fights up with the good arm and slugs away, setting up a Jackhammer for two. Cue Shane McMahon as Gunn clotheslines HHH to the floor. The referees get rid of Shane as HHH brings in the title, only to have Gunn take it away and get in his own shot for two.

HHH bumps the referee and the Fameasser (basically an ax kick in this case) connects for no count. Gunn hits him low and gets two after about thirty seconds of laying around. HHH goes up top but dives into a raised boot. Gunn’s Stinger Splash hits…well the general vicinity of the post, setting up the Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: B-. Pretty much the match of the night by far here, partially due to it getting some time and possibly due to letting them actually wrestle for a bit. Gunn was a crazy athlete but there is only so much that you can get with that name and theme song. For a one off main event here though, he did rather well as the challenger.

Post match Chyna and Shane come back out but here is Kane to chokeslam all three villains to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. There were some nice parts to this one but I’m still not sure what the main story is supposed to be. HHH doesn’t have a top challenger at the moment and the focus seems to be on whatever Rock and Mankind are doing at the moment. I’m sure things will start to come together more before the pay per view, but these shows can be more than a bit exhausting as there are so many things going on that it is hard to figure out what is going on. Just slow down a bit and let us know what we’re supposed to care about.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: May 2, 2008
Location: Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We’re done with Backlash and Undertaker beat Edge again to retain the World Title. That leaves us on the road to Judgment day and odds are the trilogy match between the two is on the horizon. Other than that we are going to need something else around here and we might start that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

Here is Teddy Long to get things going with a big announcement: the Tag Team Titles, the United States Title and the Smackdown World Title will be defended. It was a bigger announcement when I heard it on ECW but Long’s voice helps anything.

Opening sequence.

Mick Foley is brought out as the new commentator and seems to be popular.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Yang and Moore are challenging and I almost had that written down before they came to the ring. Why? Well they’ve lost to Miz and Morrison a few times already and that just isn’t enough to prove a point in 2008 WWE. Moore takes Miz down for a fast two and a legdrop is good for the same. Morrison comes in and gets dropped with a spinning middle rope crossbody for two. Yang sneaks in for two off a dropkick but Morrison pulls him off the ropes to take over for the first time.

It’s back to Miz to grab a chinlock, followed by the running corner clothesline for two. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two more and it’s back to Miz for the seated abdominal stretch. An enziguri gets Yang out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in Moore to clean house. Everything breaks down and Moore’s rollup gets two but the Moonlight Drive (apparently the debut of the name) drops Moore to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. It dragged a bit in the middle but these teams have chemistry together. That being said, it was hard to imagine Moore and Yang winning the titles in the first place and now the best thing we can do is enjoy matches without much drama about the result. The division still barely exists, so can we please get some depth going sooner than later?

ECW GM Armando Estrada introduces the next match.

Colin Delaney vs. Vladimir Kozlov

In a rare instance, neither of them have entrance music. Kozlov knocks him around with ease to start and hits a big boot to the chest. Delaney is sat on top and then thrown back down in a big crash. The reverse DDT finishes fast, with Estrada, who faces Delaney on ECW with Delaney’s future on the line, being rather pleased.

Mark Henry threatens Nunzio with pain during their match tonight.

Natalya/Victoria vs. Michelle McCool/Cherry

This was set up with some patented backstage cattiness. Natalya headlocks Michelle down to start and it’s quickly off to Victoria. Michelle pulls her off the ropes for a crash before a monkey flip puts Victoria down again. Cherry comes in with a high crossbody for two but Natalya trips her down like a villain should. The double teaming is on but Cherry manages to crawl over (despite Natalya holding her foot) for the tag to Michelle. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Natalya but Victoria shoves Michelle off the top. The crash is enough for Natalya to grab a rollup, with tights, for the pin.

Rating: C. The best thing I can say about this, and most of Smackdown’s women’s matches as of late, is that it felt like a match. It wasn’t the stereotypical Divas stuff, but rather a completely acceptable match. Michelle has come a long way in a short amount of time and I would assume a lot of that is due to working with a veteran like Victoria. That is a great benefit to have and if that is what it is, it seems to be paying dividends.

We look back at Undertaker retaining the World Title over Edge at Backlash but not letting go of the choke. Edge went out on a stretcher and Vickie Guerrero screamed a lot.

Mark Henry vs. Nunzio

Nunzio seems to know he’s about to be in extreme pain….so he brings out Big Show to be in his corner. Nunzio kicks away and it goes as well as you would expect. Henry shove shim into the corner and the World’s Strongest Slam finishes fast.

Post match Big Show gets in the ring and Henry backs off. Show tells him to pick on someone his own size. So not Show, who is 50lbs heavier and eight or so inches taller?

US Title: MVP vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is defending after beating MVP to take the title at Backlash. The referee holds the title up so MVP pulls it away, apparently feeling that it’s his. Matt headlocks him down to start and then does it again for a bonus. Back up and MVP takes it into the corner, followed by a heck of a clothesline. A slightly angrier than usual MVP hammers away and we hit the chinlock with a facelock.

Matt fights up and manages a bulldog for two, setting up the fourth headlock takeover in about five minutes. Since it’s just a headlock, MVP pops up and gets punched in the face for his efforts. The running crotch attack against the ropes gives Matt a weird looking cover for two but MVP clotheslines him down again. Matt gets knocked hard off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with MVP holding a cross arm choke and then slapping on another choke to make it worse. This time Matt fights up and grabs a tornado DDT but MVP hits the running kick to the face in the corner to knock him silly. We’re off to a crossface chickenwing of all things but Matt is back up to slug away. A very out of nowhere Twist of Fate retains the title.

Rating: B-. This was a more aggressive MVP and that style worked well for him. There was almost no way Matt was losing his title so soon after winning it, but this feud certainly deserved a long rematch. I could go for more of the aggressive MVP though as it was easier to take him more seriously. Good stuff here and the best match on the show so far.

Mick Foley is in the ring and brings in Batista, who lost to Shawn Michaels following Shawn injuring his knee. Batista respects Shawn and while he doesn’t like some things Shawn has done, it was Batista’s fault for letting his guard down. We see a clip from the Highlight Reel on Raw, with Chris Jericho accusing Shawn of faking a knee injury. That idea makes Batista sick to his stomach and he hopes Shawn is hurt. If he isn’t, he will be when Batista sees him. As usual, short form Batista is the best Batista and he got his point across fast here.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Festus starts hammering on Hawkins to start and drives some knees to the ribs. As Foley tries to figure out which one is biscuits and which one is gravy, Jesse takes over in the corner. It’s off to Ryder, who takes Jesse into the corner. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Ryder gets two off a neckbreaker. Jesse belly to backs his way to freedom and brings Festus back in to clean house. A splash hits Ryder but Hawkins offers a distraction, allowing Ryder to get in a shot to the throat. Jesse has to come back in and the neckbreaker faceplant gives Hawkins the fast pin.

Rating: C. It’s not easy to get into these matches anymore as it feels like these same teams have been fighting for months now without getting anywhere. Someone solving Festus isn’t the best sign for his future, but it’s even worse for Jesse’s, who only exists as Festus’ partner. Not a bad match, but the tag division outside of Miz and Morrison only feels like filler these days.

Finlay vs. Julio Dinero

Finlay drives a shoulder in the corner to start and drops Dinero with a clothesline. Back up and Dinero is sent outside as Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring. A backdrop and the Celtic Cross complete the squash to give Finlay the win.

Post match Hornswoggle hits a Tadpole Splash.

Smackdown World Title: Great Khali vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending…or he isn’t, as Vickie Guerrero comes out to say not so fast.

In recent weeks, Undertaker has injured a lot of people with his illegal choke. Therefore, the choke is banned and since Undertaker shows no remorse, the title is vacated. Since Undertaker won’t hand it over, Vickie sends Great Khali down to get it. Khali goes to get it and is kicked in the face. Undertaker grabs the choke as Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come down to get the title. The choke stays on so long that Khali is bleeding from the mouth as Undertaker lets go to end the show. That’s certainly a twist and at least gives them a better reason for Edge vs. Undertaker to continue aside from “Vickie says so.”

Overall Rating: C+. The twist ending boosts this up a bit as it makes things that much more intriguing. Unlike Raw, this didn’t feel as much like we’re heading for Backlash II later this month with Judgment Day. Focusing on the titles all night long is not a bad idea, and the MVP vs. Matt Hardy match was good enough for the show’s long wrestling segment. Nice enough show here, and I want to see where the main event story is going so points for getting the important stuff right.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: September 2, 1999
Location: Centrum, Worcester, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

It’s the second regular episode of the show and in theory that means things are still going to be stacked for the time being. The WWF is going to want to get as much attention to this show as they can right off the bat and they’re coming in hot with HHH as the new WWF Champion. Other than that, Unforgiven is coming up so the build might begin soon. Let’s get to it.

Here is Monday Night Raw if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chyna vs. Billy Gunn

The winner gets an Intercontinental Title shot. Hold on though as here is Intercontinental Champion Jeff Jarrett (with Debra and Miss Kitty) to join commentary. Chyna pulls down her trunks to get to Gunn to start, earning herself a kick into the corner. Gunn grabs a delayed vertical suplex but Chyna is right back with a DDT for two.

An elbow to the face drops Chyna as Jarrett wants more aggression. Chyna is sent outside and hang on as she seems to have hurt her elbow. Tis but goldbricking of course though as Chyna sends him into the steps to take over again. Back in and the referee gets bumped, meaning Gunn’s Fameasser gets no count. Cue HHH with a Pedigree to Gunn to give Chyna the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as they blazed through it and then had the interference. Granted for 1999, that’s a pretty clean finish, as there were only three people involved. Chyna vs. Jarrett for the title is a big enough deal, as Chyna continues to be completely unlike any woman wrestling has ever seen. If nothing else, Gunn vs. HHH has potential to be…I’m not sure what that would be actually but it seems to be where we are going, even if it is for the short term.

Here is a ticked off Big Show to say he is tired of the “ink sack carcass of dead meat” the Undertaker giving him all of this tough love so get down here NOW. Instead he gets Paul Bearer, who doesn’t like that kind of rudeness to Undertaker. Show drops him with one shot and demands the man instead of the messenger.

Cue Undertaker to get in Show’s face and whisper something in his ear. That leaves Show confused, but Undertaker says Show did a good number on Bearer. Then Undertaker grabs Show by the throat and says if he ever disrespects him like that again, he’ll choke Show with his own tongue. Bearer wakes up and looks stunned as the other two leave. The evil alliance continues, and that should be a good thing going forward as you can always use a pair of giants.

Here is Mankind to talk about…..playing electronic football as a kid. He happened to be naked at the time and his mother walked in. That was the most embarrassing moment of his career, at least until he lost to Shane McMahon. Therefore, he wants revenge, but he also wants to talk about the Rock. He admires the Rock’s testicular fortitude for facing Big Show and Undertaker on his own, which is what made Mankind want to be his partner.

Cue the Rock (with Mankind trying to start his own ROCKY chant) to say they’re partners but they’re not friends. Rock does recognize how crazy Mankind is but he NEVER wants Mankind to talk about Rock’s testicles again. Cue Shane McMahon, with HHH and Chyna, to interrupt. Shane brags about HHH being World Champion and knows Rock and Mankind want a title shot. That’s why they can meet in a #1 contenders match later tonight, and if they don’t bring it, they’re suspended for six months.

Also tonight, HHH gets to defend against a bald headed SOB. HHH panics, though Shane never said any name. With the villains gone, Mankind reminds Rock that he beat him for the WWF Title the last time they were in this very building. Mankind suggests that Rock could go easy on him tonight (Mankind: “That sounds cool to Mankind.”) but that isn’t going to happen. Instead, Rock threatens to shine the title up real nice and stick it inside Mankind, though Mankind doesn’t think it’ll fit. These two have amazing chemistry and Mankind’s reactions are always hilarious.

There is a limo waiting in the back.

Howard Finkel, as brainwashed by Chris Jericho, interrupts Tony Chimmel for embarrassing him….so let’s have a tuxedo match. The winner can be the ring announcer for the show, but Chimmel isn’t interested. Finkel is ready to go, and then decks Chimmel anyway. Let’s just ring the bell and get this over with.

Tony Chimmel vs. Howard Finkel

Tuxedo match and Chimmel gets Fink’s jacket off as Chris Jericho is watching in the back. Fink loses his shirt and pants, revealing the red underwear. The rest of the clothes come off as this was the rare stripping match squash.

X-Pac asks Kane to stay in the back tonight so he won’t be seen as Kane’s little buddy again.

Mankind respects The Rock, but tonight he can become #1 contender in the same arena where he became WWF Champion before. Oh and he’ll try to avoid Rock doing something to him with a belt.

HHH is worried about Shane McMahon’s announcement but Chyna tries to calm him down.

During the break, Chris Jericho suggested Howard Finkel become an underwear model. I didn’t expect to hear that today.

Chris Jericho vs. X-Pac

Hold on though as cue Ken Shamrock to chase Jericho away before the bell. X-Pac calms Shamrock down (that’s impressive) and then kicks Jericho in the face to start. A belly to back suplex gives X-Pac two and here are Big Show and Undertaker to watch from the stage. Jericho gets knocked off the top and out to the floor but manages to cut off a baseball slide to take over. A suplex back inside gives Jericho an arrogant two but he dives into a raised boot. X-Pac makes the comeback, including the flipping clothesline for two, followed by the kick to the head in the corner. The Bronco Buster connects but Big Show comes in to jump X-Pac for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Jericho is still off to a bit of a weird start around here but at least he has a feud going with Shamrock. At the same time, you have X-Pac in the lands of the giants and it still isn’t quite working. Seeing him getting beaten up over and over makes sense, but it’s a stretch to buy him hanging in there when he actually faces these giants. X-Pac is very talented, though there comes a point where it’s hard to believe what you’re seeing.

Post match Show goes after X-Pac as Shamrock runs back out to chase Jericho off. Kane runs in to save X-Pac but Undertaker, still on the stage, says Kane caring for X-Pac makes him weaker.

Post break Shamrock can’t get into Jericho’s locker room.

HHH wants an explanation from Shane McMahon but gets nothing.

WWF Title: HHH vs. ???

HHH is defending and here is Shane to introduce his bald headed SOB opponent: GILLBERG, whose Light Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. Suddenly HHH and Shane are fine again, even as Gillberg hits a spear to start fast. A gordbuster gets HHH out of trouble though and the beating is on in the corner. Shane joins commentary as Gillberg fights back, only to miss a spear and hit the post. The Pedigree retains the title fast.

Post match HHH grabs a chair, punches out the referee, and wrecks Gillberg’s knee.

We recap Big Boss Man kidnapping Al Snow’s dog Pepper. Boss Man told Snow to come to his hotel room this week and he’ll get Pepper back.

Earlier today, Snow went to the hotel room where Boss Man (who Snow keeps calling Ray in a rare moment for Boss Man) says Pepper is at the cleaners. Boss Man offers him some food, which Snow eats….and is then told that it’s his dog cooked up. Snow, with the chair stuck to him, is immediately sick, so Boss Man knocks him out and beats him up.

Ken Shamrock is still looking for Chris Jericho.

The Rock vs. Mankind

The winner gets HHH for the WWF Title at Unforgiven. They fight to the floor in a hurry and Rock suplexes him on the ramp. Mankind is right back with a hard whip into the steps (or chairs, according to Cole). Hold on though as Mankind grabs a headset to do Rock’s mid-match commentary deal, earning himself another beating so Rock can show him the right way to do this.

Back in and a double arm DDT plants Rock, meaning it’s time for Mr. Socko. The referee gets bumped so here is Shane McMahon to take over. A Rock Bottom gets Rock out of trouble but here are HHH and Chyna to beat on the two of them. That’s enough for Shane to call for the bell.

Rating: C+. They didn’t have time to do much but my goodness the chemistry that these two have is insane every time. It was on display here, even if they were rushed and got to the screwy ending on top. Mankind knows how to play off the Rock so well and Rock looks like he wants to like him just a bit, making this one of the weirdest relationships in WWF history.

Shane calls it a double DQ and I think you know where this is going.

Post break, Shane promises to make it up to Rock and Mankind.

Val Venis vs. Ken Shamrock

Shamrock is in jeans instead of trunks here as he has been looking for Chris Jericho all night. Venis hammers away to start but has to bail from the threat of an ankle lock. Back in and Venis hammers away again, only to get pulled into the ankle lock for the fast tap. Well that was quick.

Post match Shamrock won’t let go, but an invading Steve Blackman breaks it up. Shamrock beats him up too but here is Chris Jericho to call Shamrock out to fight him outside. The chase is on and Howard Finkel, dressed as Jericho, maces Shamrock. Jericho gets the Walls and Fink takes pictures, leaving Jericho to shout I KILLED KENNY! Then Fink is thrown into the trunk of Jericho’s car as Jericho speeds off. Jericho was still figuring it out but you could feel the energy every time he’s on screen.

Here are Shane McMahon, HHH and Chyna to “make it right” with Mankind and The Rock. Shane says they can get out here in five seconds and starts a fast count, only to be cut off by Test. He calls all three of them girls and brings out the other owners of the WWF: Linda and Stephanie McMahon! Linda says that since Vince McMahon isn’t here tonight, the two of them hold controlling interest over Shane (I don’t think that’s how ownership works). Therefore, tonight it’s Rock/Mankind vs. Shane/HHH, which Shane makes a Tag Team Title match.

During the break, Shane tried to get HHH to see this as a positive but HHH seems to be rather chill.

We look at the four corner #1 contenders match from Raw, with Cole calling it a “train wreck”.

Tag Team Gauntlet

The winners get a future Tag Team Title shot and it’s the Hollys in at #1 and Mideon/Viscera in at #2. Viscera splashes Crash in the corner to start and the big legdrop to the back of the head makes it worse. Mideon’s pumphandle slam gets two but Crash reverses a powerbomb into a hurricanrana for two. Everything breaks down and Viscera splashes Mideon by mistake, giving Hardcore the fast pin.

Droz/Prince Albert are in at #3, with Albert quickly taking Crash down. Crash eyepokes his way to freedom and it’s back to Hardcore vs. Droz in the most 1999 match around. A quick Falcon Arrow pins Droz and it’s the Hardyz (still the New Brood) in at #4. Matt moonsaults in onto Crash for the pin in about ten seconds and the Acolytes are in at #5.

Bradshaw hammers Matt down but Jeff comes in for a save as the pace picks up. Matt hits a neckbreaker on Faarooq and Jeff adds the Swanton. That’s not enough for a cover though, as the Clothesline From Bradshaw knocks Jeff out of the air for the pin. Blue Meanie/Stevie Richards are in at #6 but Meanie takes so long dancing to the ring that Richards gets pinned in about 15 seconds.

Edge and Christian are in at #7 with Edge tornado DDTing Bradshaw. Faarooq sends Christian into the steps but….the Dudley Boyz make their debut and deck everyone with 2x4s for the double DQ. Still no #1 contenders, but that might take things in a rather new direction.

Rating: C-. Negative points for the screwy finish, but the Dudleys debuting might make up for a bit of it. The biggest problem here was the same thing happens in every fast paced gauntlet match: it’s a little hard to buy that these people can win a fall in about 30 seconds here while it takes so much longer in a regular match. The chaos in the division continues, but said division just got a heck of a lot stronger.

Post match, the Dudleys talked about how they are the best team in the world and are here to prove it. You need to remember three things: thou shall not steal, thou shall not kill and thou shall not mess with the Dudleys. Bubba’s stutter didn’t quite fit here as it comes off as comedy rather than the otherwise serious vibe.

Tag Team Titles: Shane McMahon/HHH vs. The Rock/Mankind

Rock/Mankind are defending and Chyna is here with the challengers. The fight is on before Rock comes to the ring but he’s right there to make the save. Shane gets sent outside but a Chyna distraction lets HHH get in a chair shot to drop Mankind. Back in and Shane hammers away but Mankind punches him right back down. With that not working, HHH comes back in with a suplex and Shane adds a middle rope elbow for two.

HHH’s jumping knee gets the same as this is oddly slow paced. The Bronco Buster takes too long for Shane though and it’s a clothesline from Rock to put him down. Shane is smart enough to offer a distraction though, allowing Chyna to get in a low blow. As usual, the hot tag brings in Rock a few seconds later and house is cleaned. Everything breaks down and Shane gets knocked over the announcers’ table….as Billy Gunn runs in to take out HHH. The Rock Bottom into the People’s Elbow retains the titles.

Rating: C+. This was probably the best match of the night, which is due to the talent involved, as well as things making sense. It was still over the top because it had Shane doing his thing, but it also made sense with the story setup and the interference from Gunn. For a not very long TV main event, this went well.

Overall Rating: C+. The best thing about this time is that the Attitude Era, or at least its signature nature, is really starting to cool down. Things are still moving at a fast pace, but it isn’t completely insane. You have people doing things to each other, but it isn’t so over the top with the nuttiness (Pepper ordeal aside) where you would have to ask “what does this have to do with wrestling”. Things are starting to transition a bit and that is a nice breather after how far things went in the other direction. Throw in the Dudleys debuting for the historic moment and this was a pretty good show.

 

 

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Backlash 2008
Date: April 27, 2008
Location: 1st Mariner Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 11,277
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Mick Foley, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We are at the official Wrestlemania followup pay per view and the top of the card is rather stacked. First up we have a Wrestlemania rematch for the Smackdown World Title, though this time Edge is challenging Undertaker. On Raw, it’s a similar situation from Wrestlemania, but this time JBL is added to the John Cena/Randy Orton/HHH mix and it’s elimination Rules. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at how this is the Wrestlemania fallout, including the bigger matches.

Mick Foley is replacing Coach on commentary, which has to be a nice upgrade.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. MVP

MVP is defending in a match almost a year in the making, as they had a big feud going but then health issues slowed both of them down at different times. Feeling out process to start with neither being able to get very far early on. Matt drops the wrestling and hits him in the face, followed by a hiptoss for a quick one.

MVP puts him on top but gets elbowed back down, setting up a moonsault onto MVP’s raised knees. The abdominal stretch stays on the banged up ribs and MVP is evil enough to grab the rope. Matt grabs the leg and counters with something like a Samoan drop but MVP goes right back to the ribs. A big clothesline gets Matt out of trouble but MVP hot shots him ribs first onto the top.

The Playmaker is countered into the Side Effect for two and Matt goes up. This still doesn’t go well for him as MVP crotches him down but a super Side Effect gives Matt another near fall. MVP goes a little more basic by kicking him in the head and then does it again for a bonus. The running boot in the corner misses though and the Twist of Fate gives Matt the pin and the title.

Rating: B. The ending was a little flat but what mattered here was giving Matt the big win to FINALLY pay off the feud. Other than that, they had a hard hitting match with Matt having to fight from behind for a good portion but he managed to hang in there enough. The ending was clean too and now Matt can move on to something else, albeit likely after a big rematch with MVP first.

In the back, Matt Hardy talks about how this is the biggest win of his career and emphatically says he is BETTER THAN MVP.

ECW Title: Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

Guerrero, with Bam Neely, is challenging. Kane sends him into the corner to start and hits a basement dropkick but seems to be limping a bit. A gorilla press plants Chavo but he’s right back with some shots to the hip/leg. The still limping Kane sends him outside and gets in a ramp into the apron to work on Chavo’s back. The rather wise Chavo goes right back to the leg, sending it into the apron and post.

Neely gets in a cheap shot to validate his presence before Chavo is right back to a leglock. Kane powers up with an electric chair drop and some corner clotheslines. The side slam gets two and the top rope clothesline knocks Chavo to the apron. That’s enough for a tornado DDT to get Chavo out of trouble and it’s right back to the knee. The frog splash connects….with Kane’s hand, as he grabs Chavo by the throat for the chokeslam to retain.

Rating: C-. The problem with Kane vs. Chavo continues, as there is no reason to believe that Chavo, even with help, is going to be able to beat Kane. Throw in Neely doing almost nothing here and there was no reason to get involved here. Kane limped around a lot and then shrugged it off to take over in the end. There isn’t much to get invested in here and it shows worse every week this feud has continued.

Randy Orton isn’t worried about defending against three challengers tonight because he’s retaining the title.

Great Khali vs. Big Show

The fans seem interested as we get the big staredown to start, followed by the slugout. They trade headbutts and chops until Khali drops him with a clothesline. Show’s attempt at a slam doesn’t work as Khali knocks him out to the floor with another clothesline. A big boot drops Show back inside and Khali grabs something like a crossface (ok then). Show fights up but Khali falls on him to break up a slam attempt. The nerve hold goes on before the big chop to the head drops Show again. Show fights to his feet again and finally gets the slam, followed by the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t good, it was very slow paced, and I have no idea why anyone would have expected anything else. There is only so much that Khali is going to be able to do in the ring and they didn’t deviate from that plan, with a lot of Khali’s stuff involving him standing still. Not a good match by any means, but it was exactly how this should have gone and was far from some disaster.

John Cena and Jimmy Wang Yang seem to be talking country music when Randy Orton comes in. Cena and Orton trade threats for the main event.

We recap Batista vs. Shawn Michaels. Batista was unhappy that Shawn Michaels didn’t lay down for Ric Flair to keep his career alive. Shawn more or less told Batista to get over it and the match was set. Chris Jericho got involved as the guest referee and seems to be more on the Batista side, despite Batista sounding incredibly whiny in the whole thing.

Batista vs. Shawn Michaels

Chris Jericho is the guest referee. They circle each other a bit to start and both miss their early finisher attempts. Michaels tries to go after the arm by driving in some knees and grabbing the short armscissors. Batista powers up but they fall over the top, cranking the arm even more.

The bad arm is sent into the post and the armbar goes on back inside. Batista finally powers out of it and hits a Samoan drop, followed by a clothesline to turn Shawn inside out (that always looks cool). The good arm is used for some shoulders in the corner but Shawn counters the Batista Bomb into a Crossface. With Batista getting too close to the ropes, Shawn is smart enough to roll it back into the middle to keep cranking.

The rope is finally grabbed but Jericho has to pull Shawn off (rather quickly at that). Batista is back up with a side slam and a spear cuts Shawn in half for two. Shawn is placed up top but shoves Batista down, setting up the top rope elbow. The superkick is countered into a heck of a one armed spinebuster and Batista is shaking the ropes levels of fired up. The Batista Bomb is countered….but Shawn has hurt his knee on the landing. Batista, ever the genius, falls for it and gets superkicked for the pin.

Rating: B. This was a somewhat slower paced match but the psychology worked well. Shawn knew that he couldn’t handle Batista in a straight fight but he also knew that Batista was so mad he was going to come right for him. That let Shawn pick him apart, mainly with the arm, before outsmarting him in the end. That’s how the match should have gone and it worked well, with Jericho not being much of a factor whatsoever.

Shawn’s knee is banged up enough that he has to be helped to the back. Why do I not quite believe him?

HHH and Randy Orton have their own psych out session, with HHH saying that pride comes before the fall.

Beth Phoenix/Jillian Hall/Layla/Melina/Natalya/Victoria vs. Ashley/Cherry/Kelly Kelly/Maria/Michelle McCool/Mickie James

Beth wants Michelle to start and shoves her down early on. Michelle’s kicks to the back don’t do much as Phoenix grabs a powerslam to take over. Melina comes in and gets beaten up by Mickie but Victoria comes in to slam her down. The dancing moonsault misses and everything breaks down fast. We actually settle back down to Beth chinlocking Ashley, who slips out of the Glam Slam. Everything breaks down again and we hit the parade of finishers. Beth’s release fisherman’s suplex finishes Ashley.

Rating: C-. This is one of those matches where there wasn’t much else that could have been done. You had twelve women sharing less than seven minutes and that is not going to go well. Maybe they were never given the time to do anything or they were trying to hide some of the limitations, but the Smackdown women really need something to fight over other than bragging rights.

We recap Edge challenging Undertaker for the Smackdown World Title. Undertaker took the title from Edge, but Vickie Guerrero has set up the rematch and put Undertaker through a bunch of opponents on the way. Simple story but Vickie knows how to sell it very well.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge is challenging and is shoved outside rather quickly to start. Back in and Undertaker starts working on the arm to keep Edge in trouble and a good bit of cranking ensues. Edge gets smart by raking the eyes and knocking Undertaker outside, where a baseball slide knocks him down again. That doesn’t last long as Undertaker runs him over back inside and drops a leg for two.

Edge fights back again and gets in a shot to Undertaker’s banged up back, setting up the bodyscissors. A dropkick to the back, followed by a sliding dropkick to the back, has Undertaker in more trouble. Edge’s camel clutch goes on twice in a row, with Undertaker having to drop backwards onto him for the break.

They collide in the middle for a double knockdown but it’s Undertaker up first with Snake Eyes into the big boot. Undertaker shoves him off the top but misses a top rope legdrop of all things. With that odd visual out of the way, Edge grabs the title, only to have to counter a chokeslam to save himself. Edge goes for the turnbuckle pad, which the referee fixes, allowing Curt Hawkins to run in with a belt shot for two. Undertaker fights up again, takes out Zack Ryder, and grabs the triangle choke to retain the title.

Rating: B. This was a far cry from the Wrestlemania match and felt like a good TV match rather than a pay per view co main event. That being said, there is nothing to suggest that Edge can win a straight match against Undertaker so the ending was what made sense. Odds are this somehow still isn’t over though, as Vickie Guerrero dragging it out would not be a surprise. On top of that, who else is there on Smackdown that would make an interesting challenger right now? Anyway, nice match here, but nothing great or memorable.

Post match Undertaker keeps the hold on, with Vickie Guerrero coming out as Edge is bleeding from the nose/mouth. Undertaker leaves him laying and Vickie freaks out as Edge is taken away on a stretcher.

CM Punk wishes Randy Orton good luck, even as Orton is knocking on JBL’s door.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Randy Orton retained over John Cena and HHH at Wrestlemania so let’s do it again, with JBL added, and under elimination rules.

Raw World Title: JBL vs. HHH vs. John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending under elimination rules. We get the Big Match Intros and Orton goes for the belt, only to get knocked outside by JBL. That leaves Cena to hammer on HHH in the corner but HHH sends him outside. Cena runs Orton over on the floor and hammers away, only to get knocked off the apron and into the announcers’ table.

Orton and JBL double team HHH inside, only to have him double clothesline his way to freedom. HHH sends JBL into the steps but it’s Cena back in with the top rope Fameasser to Orton. The STFU goes on and JBL….is smart enough to not break it up. HHH crossfaces JBL, who pokes Cena in the eye to save Orton. With the crossface broken up as well, JBL boots Orton in the face for two but he clotheslines JBL right back.

JBL catches Orton on top and let’s just turn that into a Tower Of Doom for the big knockdown. Cena is back up to initiate the finishing sequence on HHH, who cuts him off with a spinebuster. A backdrop sends HHH to the floor and Cena STFU’s JBL for the tap. Before Cena can get up, Orton Punts him for the pin ten seconds later and we’re down to Orton vs. HHH.

Orton gets sent outside and rammed into the announcers’ table, only to reverse a whip into the steps. A catapult sends HHH over the barricade but a suplex brings him back to ringside. They get back inside with Orton slowly hammering away, including the backbreaker for two.

HHH fights out of the chinlock (eventually) but Orton knocks him right back down. The RKO is shoved off though and HHH scores with the jumping knee to the face. Back up and HHH hits a running clothesline to put Orton on the floor again, setting up a toss over the announcers’ table. HHH drops him onto the steps to make it even worse but Orton manages to counter the Pedigree back inside. An RKO out of nowhere gets two but the Punt, the RKO and the Pedigree all miss, setting up the Pedigree to make HHH champion again.

Rating: B-. This was weird, as the majority of the match was spent on HHH vs. Randy Orton, with Cena and JBL feeling like window dressing. That feels like a big shift over to a new feud and that might be more interesting than the three way or multi person feud. As for the match itself, the first part was quite entertaining but it got pretty dull once it got down to two, which has been the case for HHH vs. Orton over the years. The title change was a surprise though and that is kind of nice to see.

Overall Rating: B. It’s a rather unique show as you had good action and stuff did happen with some title changes, but it still didn’t exactly feel like a major event. What matters here is moving some things forward though, with the Wrestlemania rematch season wrapping up and hopefully getting us on to something else. It’s almost a hidden gem, as the action is worth seeing and nothing is too bad, but I’ll be hoping to remember this show in another day or two.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: April 25, 2008
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

It’s the go home show for Backlash and most of the show is set. We should be in for little more than a table setting show this week, as all WWE needs to do is hype up the pay per view a bit more. Undertaker isn’t going to be happy with Edge for helping to take out Kane on ECW, so vengeance may be required. For tonight though, he gets to defend the World Title against Batista. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Undertaker’s issues with Edge/Vickie Guerrero/La Familia, setting up tonight’s title match against Batista.

Opening sequence.

Here is La Familia to get things going. Edge praises Vickie Guerrero for everything she has done to get them here like the eye roll inducing villain that he is. Vickie announces that Undertaker vs. Batista is now No DQ, meaning they can beat each other up even more. Cue CM Punk to interrupt, with Edge mocking him for the King Of The Ring loss.

Punk holds up the Money In The Bank briefcase and says it’s a better way to the top than sleeping with the boss. He teases cashing in tonight, which doesn’t sit well with Edge. Not that it matters as Punk can beat Edge too, so Vickie makes the match for tonight. Edge promises to bankrupt Punk tonight. Good promo from Punk, as Edge seemed to remember the power of the briefcase.

The Miz vs. Shannon Moore

John Morrison is on commentary and Jimmy Wang Yang is here with Moore. Miz grabs a headlock takeover to start as Morrison goes on a rant about….saving the Earth? Anyway, Moore comes back with a headscissors but Miz pulls pulls him off the middle rope for a crash. A camel clutch keeps Moore in trouble and a hard clothesline takes him down again. The cobra clutch goes on but Moore fights up, only to get knocked right back down. The Reality Check is loaded up but Moore reverses into a backslide for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one as the feud between these teams continue, despite Miz and Morrison beating them multiple times already. I still like the Moore/Yang team, just for the sake of throwing two people together to see if they can get somewhere. If there was an actual tag division around here, it might make more of a difference, but this is about as much as you can expect right now.

We look at the Presidential candidates addressing Raw this week. Still a fairly cool moment.

Cherry vs. Natalya Neidhart

Michelle McCool and Victoria are here too. Natalya takes her down without much trouble to start and we’re in the chinlock fifteen seconds in. A series of slams drop Cherry again and Natalya slaps her in the face a few times. Cherry slaps back but Natalya goes to the leg to take over. A leglock has Cherry in trouble but she’s back up with a bulldog for two. That’s enough for Natalya, who grabs the Sharpshooter for the tap.

Rating: C-. Cherry is another of the long list of women who don’t exactly shine in the ring but since Deuce N Domino are nothing these days, what else is she supposed to do? Putting her in the ring as a punching bag works well enough for a short match, but she is going to need to be able to do more than slap and bulldog to matter much. Then again, it isn’t like the women’s wrestling on Smackdown matters in any meaningful way, so Cherry might not have many worries.

Video on Big Show vs. Great Khali.

Here is Matt Hardy for a chat with Michael Cole. We look at MVP injuring Matt’s knee five months ago but Matt says his knee is 100%. At Backlash, MVP is going to find out what kind of a threat Hardy is…but here is MVP to interrupt. MVP has Cole leave and accuses Matt of distorting the facts. Matt says MVP is scared but MVP isn’t having that. The reality is that he has accomplished more in a few months than Matt has in his entire career (that’s a stretch). MVP holds up the belt and then kicks Matt in the knee/hits him in the head with the belt, leaving Matt looking….I guess you could say confused?

WWE had a Reading Challenge for Wrestlemania. Nothing wrong with that.

Edge vs. CM Punk

Punk shoves Edge into the corner to start but Edge is right back with a hammerlock. That’s reversed into a cradle for one and Punk cranks on the arm as well. Back up and Edge kicks away at Punk’s ribs but Punk is right back on the arm. Punk goes up top but gets knocked out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Edge working on a bodyscissors until Punk catapults him into the corner. They hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown but Edge rolls through a middle rope crossbody for two. The GTS doesn’t work so Punk settles for the knee into the corner into the bulldog back out of it.

Edge’s Edge-O-Matic gets two more but Punk scores with the springboard clothesline. Another GTS attempt is countered into the Edgecution for two but Punk is back up for the GTS. Edge rolls outside before the cover though and Punk is frustrated. He’s also distracted by an interfering Zack Ryder, allowing Edge to hit a spear for the pin.

Rating: B-. These two were having the main event style match and it got some time to make it better. What matters more in the bigger picture though is having Punk not only rubbing elbows with but being a threat to beat main eventers. He is on the way up from ECW and into the bigger picture and having matches like this will help that transition more than anything else. They even made it clear that Edge was beaten and only survived due to the luck of falling out of the ring in a nice touch. Good match here, and it should help Punk in the long run.

We look at William Regal winning the King Of The Ring. William Regal looking mostly insane while sitting on the throne is a great visual.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Marty Garner

Kozlov easily takes him over with a headlock before headbutting Garner down with ease. The reverse DDT gives Kozlov the fast pin in another squash.

We look at Undertaker’s introduction of the triangle choke, which has been quite devastating.

Backlash rundown.

Batista goes to see Vickie Guerrero and promises to win the title back tonight. Then he’ll hurt Edge on Backlash.

We look at the Hilary Clinton vs. Barack Obama match on Raw, with Umaga saving us from what I’m assuming was Vince McMahon’s fever dream come to life.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending and this is No DQ. We get the Big Match Intros (the Big Gold Belt being held up as the prize is always cool) and Undertaker starts in on the arm. With that broken up, Undertaker is right back on the arm before Batista hits a spear. Undertaker is fine enough to go for the triangle choke before Batista can get up but the quick escape sends us to a break.

Back with Undertaker hitting the apron legdrop but Old School is broken up. Undertaker breaks up a superplex attempt and now Old School can connect. A quick spinebuster (or powerbomb according to Cole) gives Batista two but the Batista Bomb is countered with a backdrop. Batista blocks the chokeslam and a powerslam gets two more. Undertaker is back up with a chokeslam for two of his own but another spear cuts him down.

For some reason Batista rains down right hands in the corner, earning himself the Last Ride for another near fall. The steps are brought in (as I remember this is No DQ) but Batista spinebusters him onto said steps. The Batista Bomb is loaded up…and Shawn Michaels runs in with Sweet Chin Music to drop Batista. Undertaker Tombstones him for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. Mostly unnecessary stipulation aside, this did feel like an important match and that is always appreciated. These two have great chemistry together and they beat the fire out of each other until Shawn came in for the storyline advancing ending. Good main event here, as two monsters beating on each other for a long time is rather nice to see, especially on free TV.

Overall Rating: B-. The two big matches carried the show, especially with the first two shorter matches not exactly working. Backlash is feeling like a very top heavy show, but the three or so matches on top of the card should be more than enough to carry things. Good enough show here, and I’m wanting to see Backlash so we can call it a success too.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: April 21, 2008
Location: BiLo Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s a special three hour show as the King Of The Ring is back. The tournament was announced last week and now we get the whole thing wrapped up in one night. Other than that, it is the go home show for Backlash and that means it is time for the final push towards the four way match for the Raw World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

King Of The Ring First Round: Chris Jericho vs. MVP

Non-title. MVP slugs away to start but Jericho drapes him ribs first onto the top. Jericho takes it to the floor but MVP hits something like a hanging Nightmare On Helm Street back inside. Something close to a seated abdominal stretch has Jericho in trouble but he’s right back up and hits a running shoulder. A big boot gives MVP two, only to get taken down with a clothesline as the back and forth continues. The Playmaker is broken up though and Jericho gets the Walls for the clean tap.

Rating: C. It was intense while it lasted but they had no other way out besides having the US Champion tap out? Losing to Jericho isn’t some huge upset but MVP already has a title match on Sunday so why have him lose here? I’ve never gotten the thinking behind this, though it doesn’t do the loser’s title any favors.

King Of The Ring First Round: CM Punk vs. Matt Hardy

They trade forearms to start and Punk blocks the Side Effect with some elbows to the head. Punk knocks him down into a chinlock before putting him on top. What looked to be a superplex is broken up and a middle rope elbow to the back of the head rocks Punk for a change. Back up and Punk’s running knee and bulldog get two so Punk loads up the GTS. Hardy reverses into a sunset flip attempt but Punk sits down on it for the pin to advance.

Rating: C+. This was another fast and to the point match, though they kept things going so qquickly that it was entertaining. At the same time, the US Title match at Backlash has taken quite the hit in the first twenty five minutes of the show. This one isn’t as bad as the champ losing, but the title match doesn’t have quite the shine anymore.

Here’s what Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton looks like in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008.

We look back at JBL/HHH/Randy Orton attacking each other last week.

The Raw World Title match is now a four way elimination match.

JBL says tonight is about crowning the King Of The Ring but he will be crowned champion on Sunday. There is even an article about him on the front page of the New York Times!

King Of The Ring First Round: Finlay vs. Great Khali

Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Some shots to the knee manage to put Finlay down to start but Khali chokes him from the mat. A big boot drops Finlay so Hornswoggle tries to bring in the shillelagh. With that broken up, Khali wraps Finlay’s leg around the post and that’s a fast DQ.

Post match here is Big Show for the showdown with Khali. That’s enough to send Khali bailing to wait for Sunday. With Finlay being helped to the back, here is William Regal for the final first round match.

King Of The Ring First Round: Hornswoggle vs. William Regal

Regal Stretch finishes Hornswoggle in about 20 seconds.

Video on the European tour.

Here is Shawn Michaels for a chat. Shawn didn’t think he would be out here dealing with one of Ric Flair’s best friends in Batista. He needs to ask Batista something here though, so come on down. Cue Batista, with Shawn bringing up what Chris Jericho said on Smackdown: did Batista want to be the one to retire Flair? Batista asks if it would be easier if the answer was yes. Either way, Batista is ending this at Backlash, but Shawn promises to show Batista why he is the Heartbreak Kid. Shawn is willing to do anything to win, so be ready. Violence is teased but they leave.

In light of the Pennsylvania Presidential Primary, Hilary Clinton joins us and says the election is starting to sound like King of the Ring. This time though, the Last Woman Standing may be a woman. Whoever wins will have a lot of challenges to overcome but she will stay in the political arena and won’t come after Randy Orton. She might drop the People’s Elbow though. This was as eye roll inducing as you could have imagined but points for actually showing up.

Hardcore Holly vs. Carlito

Cody Rhodes and Santino Marella are here too. Holly starts fast and hammers him into the corner. An atomic drop hits Carlito but he knees Holly in the ribs and takes over. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back before an elbow to the face cuts off Holly’s comeback. The Alabama Slam is countered into the Backstabber to give Carlito the pin.

Rating: C-. This was as interesting as a Carlito vs. Hardcore Holly match to set up Carlito/Santino Marella vs. Holly/Cody Rhodes Tag Team Title match was going to be. This feud is pretty horrible, but it isn’t like the titles have felt important in a good while. Just find some better teams. It really shouldn’t be that hard.

Post match Santino promises to win the Tag Team Titles but Cody clears the ring.

HHH promises to win the title at Backlash.

King Of The Ring Semifinals: CM Punk vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title. Jericho grabs a headlock takeover and gets absolutely nowhere. Back up and Punk starts kicking away at the leg but gets dropped ribs first across the top rope. Jericho stays on the ribs until a hammerlock lariat gives Punk two. They go to a pinfall reversal sequence and Punk’s snap powerslam gets two more. The Walls have Punk right back down, sending him over to the rope for the break. Jericho goes up but gets kicked in the head, setting up the GTS for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. It was fun while it lasted but they got out of there really fast. Maybe their time was cut short, but the Intercontinental Champion losing in about six and a half minutes completely clean is a strange thing to see. That being said, Punk is getting a push here and points for trying to make someone new.

Senator Barack Obama says it’s a chance to change business as usual and get rid of people trying to become King (of the ring). Do you smell what Barack is cooking? He certainly has charisma.

King Of The Ring Semifinals: William Regal vs. Finlay

This should be fun and Finlay is very banged up coming in. Finlay sends him outside but his band knee is sent into the steps. Back in and Regal goes after the knee like a true villain (or smart wrestler) should. Finlay forearms away and a backslide (which falls apart on the way down) gets two. Regal’s running knee knocks Finlay silly though and the Regal Stretch knocks Finlay out to send Regal to the finals.

Rating: C. Another short match here, which continues the issue of a one night tournament needing to be rushed, even if there is an extra hour. Regal and Finlay could have a heck of a fight if given the chance, but three and a half minutes with Finlay being banged up coming in isn’t going to allow that. Instead we got Regal being a villain who exploited an injury, which might just be a bit better.

Senator John McCain uses a bunch of wrestling catchphrases and promises to introduce Osama Bin Laden to the Undertaker and tells us to vote. All three of these were pretty bad, but they did take the time to appear.

Backlash rundown.

John Cena is tired of talking and wants to fight. He talks about how he knows he has a chance on Sunday and the other three have to go through him.

WWE has helped with a literacy program. Nothing wrong with that.

Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton

Let’s get this over with as I’m sure Vince McMahon finds this hilarious. Clinton comes out to Real American and has a Bill Clinton impersonator. Before the match, Hilary cuts a promo for the Hilamaniacs and there is an eerie silence as she stops to bicker with Bill. Fans: “MONICA! MONICA!”

Obama, with big fake ears, comes out to Rock’s theme. His Rock impression isn’t well received but Bill cuts him off. Hilary jumps him to start and gets two off a slam into a legdrop. The Rock Bottom connects (Bill: “Honey are you go???) but Bill breaks up the People’s Elbow (Bill: “I did not have inappropriate conduct.”). Umaga finally comes in and the match is thrown out.

Umaga wrecks both of them, ending one of the dumbest segments that probably had a certain someone howling backstage.

Here are a bunch of the more popular Divas for a chat. Last week, Mickie James won the Women’s Title from Beth Phoenix, which they never thought possible. Mickie is brought out for a chat, plus a lot of hugging. Cue the evil Divas, with Beth Phoenix promising to get the title back. McCool slaps Beth and the big brawl is on.

Mr. Kennedy is back next week. He was gone?

King Of The Ring: William Regal vs. CM Punk

Regal takes him into the corner to start and hammers away but Punk sends him into the buckle. A belly to back suplex drops Punk for two and Regal cranks on both arms. Punk finally slips out and kicks him in the head. It’s too early for the GTS though as Regal grabs the rope and knees him in the head. The Regal Stretch makes Punk tap and Regal is King.

B: C. So that’s the tournament, with the longest match not even breaking seven minutes. This was another match that just came and went because there wasn’t time to do much. Punk’s ribs were tied throughout the matches he wasn’t even in the ring for fifteen minutes throughout the night. I like Regal winning though, as he is great when given a chance to showcase everything he can do. Just do better with the tournament next time, or stretch it out to a second week.

Post match Regal sits on the throne and we’re off to a break rather quickly.

Here is Randy Orton for the main event, but first he says he is tired of everyone talking about taking his title. He has nothing to say except for listing off the shows where he retained.

Randy Orton/John Bradshaw Layfield/Chavo Guerrero/Edge vs. HHH/Kane/Undertaker/John Cena

That’s a pretty outstanding group of good guys. Edge tries to jump Undertaker to start and gets caught with a quick Old School. We take a break and come back with Edge charging into HHH’s spinebuster, allowing the diving tag to Cena. The Shuffle is broken up thanks to a Chavo low bridge though and it’s Orton coming in to kick him in the ribs.

JBL gets two off a neckbreaker as the villains start taking turns on Cena. Orton grabs the chinlock with a bodyscissors until Cena powers up for a ram into the corner. The tag brings in Kane and everything breaks down. Kane chokeslams Chavo but Edge comes in off a blind tag and hits a spear for the pin.

Rating: C+. This felt like a house show match where you get your big names in the ring to end the show. It worked for what it was, in that it previewed multiple pay per view title matches at once, though there was no reason to believe it was going to be anything great. Kane taking the fall when Chavo is there is a bit weird, but maybe they feel they have beaten him into the ground enough.

Post match we hit the parade of finishers, with Undertaker chokeslamming Orton and JBL to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a strange show in that they tried to pack in a lot and it was too overcrowded. Between the tournament, the political stuff and the build towards the pay per view, this felt like it needed to be about four hours, or two regular weeks, to make it work. What we got did work and they covered a lot, but it felt like it could have been that much better rather than just doing ok with everything. Cut some of this stuff out and let the show breathe a bit more and it’s that much better. Or just get rid of the Obama vs. Hilary match because that was an audience of one deal if I’ve ever seen one.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 30, 1999
Location: FleetCenter, Boston, Massachusetts
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

As usual, it’s been a minute since we’ve been here and things have been changing a bit. HHH is the new WWF Champion, having defeated Mankind last week. He also successfully defended the title against the Rock last week on the debut of a new show called Smackdown. We’re on the way to Unforgiven and the card needs to get started so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is the Rock to get things going and yep the people seem to like him. After declaring that he is FINALLY in Boston again, Rock blames a wannabe cowboy commissioner named Shawn Michaels for costing him the WWF Title on Smackdown. Rock is going to take Shawn’s little cowboy hat, spin his six shooter around, and stick it, uh, somewhere. He calls out HHH for a fight but doesn’t get him, which sends Rock to the back to find HHH himself. We cut to the Rock in the back, where HHH, Chyna and Shane McMahon all jump him in a hallway. Mankind makes the save.

Here are Shane McMahon and the Mean Street Posse for a chat. Shane has heard that Rock and Mankind want a WWF Title shot tonight so they can have it….if they can defeat their respective opponents. We’ll start with the Rock, who gets to face the Undertaker in a no holds barred, falls count anywhere match. As for Mankind, Shane beat him last week but first, Mankind attacked the Mean Street Posse. That’s why tonight, Mankind has to beat all of them RIGHT NOW!

Mankind vs. Mean Street Posse

If Mankind wins, he gets a WWF Title shot against HHH tonight. Oh and Shane McMahon will be the guest referee! As expected, it’s a triple teaming to start but Mankind fights back like he’s Mankind and they’re the Mean Street Posse. The beating is on with Mankind hitting the running knee in the corner on Rodney but Joey Abs gets in a chair shot (behind Shane’s back of course) for a breaker.

Back in and Joey (with his foot in a cast) stomps away as Pete throws in a trashcan. Shane misses the beating but does stop to yell at them, allowing a double suplex to get two on Mankind. Joey’s street sign hits Rodney by mistake but Shane has hurt his ankle. A shovel to the head drops Joey but Shane won’t count. That earns Shane the Mandible Claw, which draws in HHH for the brawl. The match is thrown out with Mankind being declared the winner by DQ, but Shane makes the correction (as Lilian Garcia seemed to mess up).

Rating: C-. There was only so much you could get out of this was it wasn’t going to be anything more than a joke. That’s what the Posse was there for, but they didn’t bother trying to do anything more than goofy nonsense. They had to have a way to keep Mankind from getting the title shot and these shenanigans are as good as they could have done, all things considered.

Undertaker, with Big Show and Paul Bearer, isn’t worried about facing the Rock tonight. He’s ready to shove a soup bone down Rock’s throat, as Undertaker isn’t exactly speaking like his normal self here.

Undertaker vs. The Rock

No Holds Barred and Falls Count Anywhere, which is different than hardcore because there’s probably going to be a hardcore match later. Undertaker has Big Show and Paul Bearer with him and Rock gets a WWF Title match later tonight if he wins. Actually never mind, as Undertaker doesn’t think Rock has earned the right to do this so Big Show is doing it instead.

Big Show vs. The Rock

Same everything as before as that’s a lot to type again. Undertaker is on commentary (that’s a WEIRD one) and Rock is in street clothes as he punches away at Show to start. A clothesline puts Show on the floor but he sends Rock into the barricade to slow him down. Rock is fine enough to hit a Russian legsweep on the ramp but Show knocks him down again without too much trouble.

Back in and Show misses a charge into the corner so they head right back to the floor. Rock slips out of a ram into the post though and puts on a headset, offering to slap the dead off Undertaker’s head. A right hand drops Undertaker but the distraction lets Show chokeslam Rock through the announcers’ table for the pin. Lilian: “Your winner, the Undertaker!”

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to go anywhere, but at least they got in a hardcore match in about three and a half minutes. Throw in the fact that they managed to have two of the three biggest heroes in the company lose in the first 40 or so minutes of the show and that’s not too bad. That’s a rather Russo style show for you and I have a feeling it’s going to get even worse.

Post match HHH comes out to go after Rock but Undertaker grabs him by the throat. Cue Mankind to go after Show and Undertaker, allowing HHH to escape.

Al Snow is rather upset about Big Boss Man stealing his dog Pepper. As he pleas for people to help him, we can hear sounds of some rather adult actions taking place off screen.

Here is Big Boss Man for a chat. He asks for and gets Al Snow out here, with Boss Man saying Snow lived up to his end of the bargain on SmackDown. Then Snow was crying on Heat and Boss Man got the feeling. Snow keeps asking where Pepper is and Boss Man tells him to come to his hotel this week on Smackdown and he’ll get Pepper back. They even shake on it.

We look back at Chris Jericho putting Road Dogg through a table on Smackdown and injuring his back, putting Dogg on the shelf for a long time.

X-Pac vs. Taka Michinoku

Funaki is here with Taka. X-Pac hammers away to start but Funaki gets in a cheap shot. Taka knocks him outside and gets in a few shots, only to miss a moonsault back inside. A sitout powerbomb sets up the Bronco Buster and the X Factor for the fast pin on Taka.

Rating: C. X-Pac is in a weird place here as he’s too big to be fighting these smaller guys but not big enough to be in the main event scene. What matters is the fans are behind him though and he is more than good enough in the ring to back it up. They just have to find the right way to use him though and this was just a way to keep him warm.

Post match X-Pac takes out an invading Funaki as well. X-Pac says he wants the big guys.

Edge and Christian vs. The Acolytes vs. The Hollys vs. The Hardys

Elimination rules and the winners get a Tag Team Title match. It’s a brawl to start but Viscera, Mideon, Prince Albert, Droz, Stevie Richards and the Blue Meanie come in for the no contest. In a four way elimination match. In about a minute. The referees breaking it up takes longer than the match.

Here is the Rock to say Undertaker and Big Show didn’t impress anyone so he wants a handicap match tonight. First though, he wants to stick Undertaker’s head inside Big Show. Mickey Mouse tattoos are mentioned as well. Cue Mankind to say he didn’t like the Rock at some point, but now the people want and need him to be the Rock’s partner for a shot at the Tag Team Titles. Mankind even loads up Rock’s catchphrase but Rock cuts him off and says sure. Just DON’T YOU EVER steal his catchphrases again, but Mankind even rips off the IF YOU SMELL, which has Rock annoyed.

Here is Meat, with Terri Runnels, for a chat, but Terri hits on the Rock on the way up the ramp. He isn’t impressed. Hold on though as we get a GTV segment of Meat and Marianna, shall we say enjoying each other behind the interview set earlier. Terri goes after Meat but here are Marianna and Chaz (her boyfriend) for the big brawl.

Miss Kitty helps with Debra’s hair because the hair stylist has no idea what she is doing.

Jeff Jarrett/Mark Henry vs. D’Lo Brown/Billy Gunn

Debra and Miss Kitty are here with Jarrett and here is Chyna to do commentary. Brown clotheslines Jarrett down to start and something like a Sky High gets two. Jeff gets in a shot of his own and it’s Henry coming in for a gorilla press drop. Choking on the rope ensues as Kitty works on Debra’s hair. A clothesline puts Brown down as Chyna promises to get revenge and Jeff Jarrett’s Intercontinental Title. Brown gets in a shot of his own and everything breaks down. The distraction lets Chyna come in with the guitar….which hits Gunn by mistake, giving Jarrett the pin.

Rating: C. It wasn’t even four minutes long but it was nice to have a pretty run of the mill tag match until the screwy ending. There is nothing wrong with putting two potential title matches together, but Chyna seems more likely to get the Intercontinental Title shot (signing a contract helps). That’s more interesting than Gunn, which is the case with just about anything.

Test names Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco the best men for his wedding to Stephanie McMahon. Whichever has the better memory gets to hold the ring.

Gangrel vs. Ken Shamrock

Gangrel has the Hardys with him, with commentary getting on Lilian Garcia for not calling them the New Brood. The bell rings and you can hear what sounds like a fire extinguisher putting out the Brood’s ring of fire entrance. Shamrock goes for the leg to start and Gangrel heads straight to the floor. Gangrel slugs away outside but the Hardys’ distraction is enough to get them ejected. Back in and Shamrock can’t quite get the ankle lock so Gangrel elbows him in the face. Shamrock kicks away and elbows him in the face, setting up the ankle lock for the tap.

Rating: C. It’s almost weird to see a match from this era getting about five minutes and of all their options, it’s Gangrel vs. Ken Shamrock? Gangrel wasn’t the biggest threat to Shamrock but it was nice to have him doing something other than drinking red liquid. Shamrock was in a weird place at this point and needs something to do, as just beating up Gangrel isn’t the most interesting.

Post match avowed Jericholic Howard Finkel introduces Chris Jericho, who says he isn’t coming out here to fight Shamrock. Instead, Shamrock can show up at Smackdown and clean his boots. Shamrock gives a slow motion chase.

Mankind wants to do the People’s Elbow but Rock tells him to stick with the sock gimmick. Mankind: “Mr. Socko.”

Here is Women’s Champion Ivory for a chat. After yelling at Michael Cole for undressing her with his eyes, she declares that she is not a sl**. Tori on the other hand is, so here is Tori to jump Ivory (and hitting Cole in the process), with Luna Vachon and Jacqueline coming in to join the brawl.

We look at Big Show chokeslamming Rock through the announcers’ table earlier.

Tag Team Titles: Big Show/Undertaker vs. Mankind/The Rock

Show and Undertaker are defending and Show hammers Mankind down to start as Undertaker doesn’t look overly interested. Undertaker gets in some shots to Mankind on the floor, with Rock having to make a save back inside. The bearhug goes on (showing how big Show really is) until Mankind punches his way to freedom. With that not working, Show punches him outside for another beating from Undertaker.

Mankind gets dropped on what is left of the broken announcers’ table as Paul Bearer comes out. Bearer says something to Undertaker, who walks out as Mankind gets in a shot of his own. The hot tag brings in Rock to clean house, only to have Show plant him with a chokeslam. Mankind’s chair is knocked into his face before Show’s delayed cover gets two on Rock. The referee gets bumped though and Rock BLASTS Show in the head with the chair. A double People’s Elbow gives Rock the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. This was another rare match that got some time and it helps a little bit, but there were so many things going on through the match that you can only get so much out of it. Between the chair shot, the ref bump and the Bearer/Undertaker stuff, it was hard to get into things. Throw in the fact that the Tag Team Titles mean nothing and this is little more than a big pop at the end without much else going on to get there. Kind of like most of the Attitude Era when you think about it.

Overall Rating: C+. It was another show with all kinds of stuff going on at the same time, but the addition of Smackdown can help things out a bit. If nothing else, it is nice to see some of the rapid fire stories siphoned off to Smackdown instead of doing everything on Raw for a change. It was a show with a bit more coherent string of stories throughout and we should be in for some good things on the way towards Unforgiven. Nice stuff here, with Smackdown possibly being the saving grace.

 

 

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: April 18, 2008
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Attendance: 17,422
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jonathan Coachman

We’ll finish up the England excursion here with the blue guys. These shows can be a cross between a bunch of stuff mainly for the live fans and a show that actually matters so we could be in for either here. Backlash is almost here though and Edge vs. Undertaker II is down for the main event so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Chris Jericho for the Highlight Reel to get things going. Jericho reminds us that he is the guest referee for the Backlash match between Shawn Michaels and his guest this week, Batista. Cue Batista, with Jericho saying he thinks Shawn relished retiring Ric Flair and all of his lies over the years. We look at a clip from Raw where Jericho made such accusations, earning himself Sweet Chin Music.

Back live, Jericho says that kick proved him correct and for that, Jericho says you’re welcome to Batista. That’s not what Batista was looking for because he didn’t need Jericho to speak for him. Batista says this is between himself and Shawn so Jericho has nothing to do with this. Jericho offers some analysis: Batista is upset at Shawn for retiring Ric Flair because he wanted to do it himself. We get a quick fan pole about Jericho’s claims but Batista takes him out with the Batista Bomb.

Tommy Dreamer vs. MVP

Non-title and Matt Hardy is on commentary. Dreamer slugs away to start and grabs an armbar, which doesn’t last long. MVP gets in a shoulder to the ribs before sending him throat first into the bottom rope. Some more knockdowns set up Ballin for two but Dreamer gets a boot up in the corner. The comeback is on including a neckbreaker to give Dreamer two. The DDT gets the same but MVP sends him shoulder first into the post. A running boot in the corner finishes Dreamer off.

Rating: C. Not quite a squash here but it was there to have MVP get a quick win over someone the fans care about. Dreamer got in a few shots here and there but it was done in about five minutes, as it should be. Now they just need to get to MVP vs. Hardy, which is more than a bit overdue.

Hornswoggle vs. Matt Striker

This is revenge for Hornswoggle helping inlay beat Striker last week. Before the match, Striker goes on a rant about how unfair this is when he is far too smart. Hold on because Hornswoggle, with Finlay, starts with some juggling before throwing the tennis balls at Striker. Then it’s some squirt guns, followed by some bigger water guns. Striker finally gets smart by going after Finlay on the floor before finally taking Hornswoggle down and hammering away. The Shillelagh is picked up but the referee takes it away, allowing Finlay to get in his own shot to Striker’s head. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Rating: C. It’s kind of hard to get annoyed at anyone, including Hornswoggle, beating up a goof like Striker. The only reason he is around is to get beaten up like this and it being all goofy made it better. They didn’t waste a ton of time on this and it wasn’t meant to be anything more than a quick joke.

Big Show didn’t care for Great Khali giving him a goat and a chicken last week. Tonight he has Mark Henry, which is going to be a big showdown.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Jamie Noble

Bam Neely is here with Chavo. Noble takes him down by the leg to start but Chavo is back up with a running shoulder. Chavo’s headlock on the mat doesn’t last long as they trade rollups for two each until the armbar goes on. Back up and Noble grabs a northern lights suplex for two but Chavo knocks him down and Eddie dances. Noble manages a quickly broken up Sharpshooter attempt so Chavo necksnaps him across the top. The frog splash finishes Noble off.

Rating: C-. Talented people don’t always make for the most interesting matches as this was a good bit of chinlocking before Chavo finished him off. Chavo beating up a former Cruiserweight Champion and having an impressive looking bodyguard isn’t going to make him all that much more interesting. I’m sure he’ll still be near the top of ECW for the time being though because of course he will be, but it’s not quite working.

Mark Henry vs. Big Show

They shove each other away from a lockup to start until Henry knocks him away. The bearhug goes on to keep Show in place until a shove and superkick get Show out of trouble. There’s a chokeslam to Henry but cue Great Khali to come out and go after Show for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This didn’t have the time to go anywhere but it was mainly spent in a bearhug with some shoving included. The idea of getting Show ready for Khali was fine but the match was pretty lame on the way there. Then again the idea of Show vs. Khali in a featured match could be rough, even if it wouldn’t be much bigger than this.

Post match the brawl is on with Khali hitting a chokebomb (with Show pretty clearly doing all of the work).

Backlash rundown.

Video on Batista vs. Undertaker before tonight’s main event.

Victoria vs. Cherry

Natalya and Michelle McCool are here too. Victoria powers her down into the corner to start and then hits a clothesline to cut off the comeback. Cherry grabs a rollup out of the corner for two but Victoria slaps on a reverse chinlock. Victoria keeps up the beating and trash talking but Victoria makes the mistake of yelling at Michelle. In a totally original ending, the distraction lets Cherry grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. So many of these women’s matches are just dreadful as there’s nothing to them since they rarely get any time and often involve someone who really can’t do anything in the ring. It also doesn’t help that there’s nothing on the line, so why should I get invested here? Cherry doesn’t wrestle often, but when your big weapon is a rollup, what are you supposed to do?

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Leroy Kincaid

Kincaid is in pretty good shape. Kozlov works on the arm to start and shoves him away before hitting a headbutt to the chest. An overhead belly to belly sets up the reverse DDT to give Kozlov the easy win.

Video on Edge vs. Undertaker.

Edge and the Edgeheads have front row tickets.

Batista vs. Undertaker

Non-title. Undertaker takes him into the corner to start and gets two off a clothesline. Batista hits the corner shoulders and elbows Undertaker in the face for two of his own. The running DDT drops Batista again and Undertaker stomps away in the corner. Old School is broken up and it’s a double clothesline to leave them both down. We take a break and come back with Undertaker choking on the ropes and staying on the arm.

Old School is blocked again and a superplex brings Undertaker back down for one. Undertaker is right back on the arm and now Old School connects. They go outside with Batista being dropped onto the barricade for two but he’s right back with the spear. That bangs up the arm though and a delayed cover only gets two. Batista dumps him to the floor and they brawl at ringside until it’s a double countout.

Rating: B-. This was a way to get the stars in the ring to continue one of the biggest feuds of the last year or so. The ending was a good way to protect both of them before their major pay per view matches but even the two of them in a match like this feels like something special. There aren’t many options that can make something that work but they got the right one here.

Post match the brawl stays on with Edge and the Edgeheads being drawn in so they can get beaten up too. Edge escapes so here is Vickie Guerrero (with an EXCUSE ME) to say that Edge and the Edgeheads are members of the audience so lawsuits could be filed. No worry though, because their justice will come when it’s Undertaker vs. Batista for the title next week, with the winner facing Edge at Backlash.

Overall Rating: C. Much like this week’s ECW, there wasn’t much to be seen here other than one match. These England shows tend to be more like that but the spectacle does often work. Things will be back to normal next week as Backlash gets closer and we head back stateside, but for now it’s one match worth seeing and little else.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: April 15, 2008
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Attendance: 17,422
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We’re over in England this week as the European tour is on. In this case, we have a special main event as the Brothers of Destruction are here. That alone should be enough to carry the show, as there is little to care about other than one or two stars. Maybe they have something else to help it out, because the show needs it. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a preview of the show, which in this case means Undertaker/Kane vs. Miz/John Morrison. Well that ups the star power.

Opening sequence.

Tazz tells us that this is Joey Styles’ last night on the show as he is going on to head up WWE.com. We meet the new play by play announcer: Mike Adamle. Oh boy.

CM Punk/Kofi Kingston/Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore vs. Elijah Burke/Deuce N Domino/Shelton Benjamin

Well it’s different. Domino and Punk start things off with Punk taking over. Moore comes in with a sunset flip and starts on the arm, as the good guys get to take their turns. Yang hits a dropkick and lands on Domino for two before it’s back to Punk. Benjamin comes in and gets kicked in the face as everything breaks down on the floor.

We take a break and come back with Burke missing an elbow to Punk, allowing Kofi to come in for an armbar. The rapid fire tags continue as it’s off to Moore to stay on the arm. Burke comes in and uppercuts Yang to take over, setting up the running crotch attack to the back of the head. Benjamin and Deuce put on a chinlock each before Domino drops a leg. A backdrop gets Yang out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in Kingston to clean house. Everything breaks down and Trouble In Paradise finishes Deuce (who had tagged in) for the win.

Rating: C+. This match got some time and picked up steam as it kept going. What mattered here was keeping Kingston strong as ECW is certainly protecting him. With Punk pretty clearly not long for the minor show, fresh talent is going to be needed. Kingston is getting better in his spot so maybe he could do some good in the future.

We look back at Chavo Guerrero and his lackeys beating up Kane, including his new bald enforcer.

Kane promises revenge on Chavo, but tonight it’s about the Brothers of Destruction.

And now, a Diva Dance Off, featuring Layla, Maryse, Eve, Lena Yada and Kelly Kelly. Tazz, the emcee, demonstrates a bit of dancing (or kind of jiggling in his case) before everyone gets to go. Shockingly Layla and Eve, the former professional dancers, blow everyone else away but Kelly, the only one to remove clothing, wins. Post contest, Kelly and Tazz dance together in a funny moment.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Mike Knox

Colin Delaney is here with Dreamer. Hold on though as here is Armando Estrada to change things up.

Colin Delaney vs. Mike Knox

Dreamer is sent to the back. Total destruction with Knox hitting a swinging Downward Spiral for the pin in about a minute.

Miz and John Morrison say they’re a real team while Undertaker and Kane are always fighting each other. Morrison is even willing to let Miz start the match!

Miz/John Morrison vs. Kane/Undertaker

Non-title. Kane shoulders Miz down to start and sends him shoulder first into the corner. Undertaker comes in to punch the shoulder, setting up Old School. Morrison breaks up the apron clothesline with a legdrop though and we take a break. Back with Morrison striking away at Undertaker in the corner, only to have Undertaker show him how it’s done.

Morrison gets struck in the face a few times, allowing Kane to come in with a side slam to Miz. A Morrison distraction lets Miz get in a chop block though and Morrison comes in to crank on the knee. Miz hammers away until an uppercut and big boot give Kane a breather. That’s enough for Undertaker to come in and really take over, including Snake Eyes into the big boot. Double chokeslams set up the Tombstone to finish Morrison.

Rating: C. This is a good example of “it was what it was” as Kane and Undertaker ended up decimating the champs in the end. Miz and Morrison got in a bit of offense on Kane but there is no way to buy this working when things evened up. It’s also no shame to lose to a pair of monsters with success of their own like Undertaker and Kane, so Miz and Morrison could have come out looking worse.

The Brothers posing with their titles is a great visual to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Pretty skippable show, but then again it felt like it was more for the live fans than anything else. ECW really needs to develop some new names and right now it seems to be Kane and Kofi Kingston leading the charge. Kane is fine, but Kofi has a long way to go but the potential is there. This week was more or less a spectacle though and it was an easy enough way to burn through about forty five minutes.

 

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Wrestlemania XXXI
Date: March 29, 2015
Location: Levi’s Stadium, Santa Clara, California
Attendance: 76,976
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This is an interesting show as most people really weren’t looking forward to it. The card isn’t that bad on paper but the interest is still low. Reigns vs. Lesnar isn’t the most exciting main event and the idea of HHH vs. Sting as a regular match is borderline terrifying. The show has surprised me before though so let’s get to it.

The set is HUGE this year with a very wide stage and a big circle for the Titantron looking like a play button on the WWE Network. It’s another open air stadium and since it’s on the west coast, the sun is shining very brightly for a unique look.

Pre-Show: Tag Team Titles: Tyson Kidd/Cesaro vs. Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. New Day

One fall to a finish. Kidd and Cesaro, with Kidd’s wife Natalya, are defending and it’s Kofi Kingston/Big E. (minus the Langston) for New Day with Xavier Woods in their corner. The Usos (in San Francisco 49ers colors) have Jimmy’s wife Naomi and Los Matadores still have El Torito. Cesaro and Kofi start fighting with Kingston scoring a quick dropkick but Diego tags himself in.

A ticked off Cesaro pulls Jey off the apron and whips him into the barricade, re-aggravating a shoulder injury and taking Jey out. Kofi monkey flips Diego for two and gets punched in the face as Jey is being taken to the back. Back to Cesaro for a chinlock before the Swing sends Kofi into Kidd’s dropkick. Kofi gets kicked into the corner so Jimmy can tag himself in for a superkick to Cesaro.

Kidd, Fernando, Big E. and Cesaro are all down in a corner and Jimmy nails the running Umaga hip attack to each one of them. Kofi dives onto Diego as any semblance of the tagging has been abandoned. Kidd springboards into a superkick from Jimmy, who charges into an uppercut from Cesaro. Big E. comes in and launches Kofi into a double knee to Cesaro’s chest for two.

Cesaro’s apron superplex takes Big E. down and Los Matadores add a powerbomb/Backstabber combo to Kofi with Kidd breaking up the pin. Kofi goes after Kidd on the floor but has to catch Torito, allowing Natalya to put the bull in a Sharpshooter to continue a stupid mini feud. Jimmy and Naomi dive onto Kidd, Kofi and Fernando. Back in and the Midnight Hour (Big Ending from Big E. (a powerslam drop) and a middle rope DDT from Kofi) plants Diego with Jimmy and Cesaro making stereo saves.

Fernando switches with Diego for a rollup on Big E. but the referee says he’s not legal. If that’s true, I want to buy that referee a ham sandwich. Big E. picks up Diego and Kidd at the same time but Jimmy breaks it up with a superkick. Kidd eats Trouble in Paradise but Cesaro uppercuts Kofi on top. Los Matadores go up top for a double superplex but Cesaro and Big E. make it a double Tower of Doom. JBL: “OH THE HUMANITY!” Jimmy adds a Superfly splash to Big E. but Cesaro steals the pin at retain at 9:58.

Rating: B. Total and complete insanity here (described as a car wreck by the commentators) which was all it needed to be. They didn’t go with a copy of last year’s match, even though a lot of the participants were the same. Kidd and Cesaro were really clicking as a team and the division as a whole was looking up until Kidd’s injury in June.

Pre-Show: Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Adam Rose, Alex Riley, Big E., Big Show, Bo Dallas, Cesaro, Curtis Axel, Damien Mizdow, Darren Young, Diego, Erick Rowan, Fandango, Fernando, Goldust, Heath Slater, Hideo Itami, Jack Swagger, Jimmy Uso, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Konnor, Mark Henry, Ryback, Sin Cara, The Miz, Titus O’Neil, Tyson Kidd, Viktor, Xavier Woods, Zack Ryder

Rose loves to party, Riley is back from injury, Axel is dressed like Hulk Hogan in a gimmick called Axelmania after he was never officially eliminated from the 2015 Royal Rumble, Dallas is a self-obsessed motivational speaker, Mizdow is Sandow copying the Miz as his stunt double (and becoming incredibly popular due to how hard he’s worked at the character), Itami is an NXT guy who won a tournament for this spot and Konnor and Viktor are a power team called the Ascension. The seven people from the opening match are surprise additions to this.

Axel breaks up the brawling to start so he can rip off his shirt, earning himself an elimination from the masses. Everyone keeps fighting until Rose and Fandango eliminate each other. Miz and Mizdow double team Riley and get rid of him with Miz taking the credit. Dallas eliminates Ryder, takes a victory lap, and then gets kicked out by Itami. The fans are way into him so here’s Big Show to eliminate Itami before anyone gets too excited.

Kane gets rid of Los Matadores at the same time and Cesaro does the same to Rose. Henry throws out Kidd but the ring is still WAY too full. Ascension gets rid of Henry and knocks Show down in a stupid move. Ryback dumps Ascension for their brilliance, followed by Young and Slater a few seconds after. Titus goes out too and it’s all Ryback, so Big Show is RIGHT THERE to cut him off.

Show clotheslines Swagger out and takes out all three members of New Day from the apron. You WILL respect Big Show and his amazing strength whether you like it or not. We’re down to Show, Rowan, Uso, Ryback, Cesaro, Goldust, Miz, Mizdow and Kane. The fans are behind Mizdow as Show dumps Rowan.

Ryback gets rid of Goldust but Kane saves Big Show for no logical reason. Miz and Mizdow take a double chokeslam from Kane, who is quickly slammed out by Cesaro. Show dumps Jimmy but gets picked up by Cesaro again, only to escape and dump Cesaro with ease. Ryback grabs a spinebuster on Show and is eliminated for trying to get any momentum.

It’s Miz, Mizdow and Show for the final three but Mizdow FINALLY stands up to Miz and tells him to go do it himself. Miz gets annoyed and yells at him for about a minute as Show just stands back and watch. Mizdow snaps and eliminates Miz and gets to fight Big Show on his own. Some clotheslines have the giant in trouble and Mizdow low bridges him halfway out. Show gets back up and shrugs off a front facelock before easily eliminating Mizdow at 18:08.

Rating: D. So yeah, all hail Big Show, may his name forever be praised, because he’s big and strong and bald and was here back in 1999 so we must give him a win. On top of that, they were trying to push the idea that Big Show had never won a battle royal, ignoring the one he won on Smackdown in 2014 and the one he won on Raw in 2006.

Instead of using this to make Mizdow into someone important, they went with Big Show because he just hasn’t won anything important in a long time. This was it for Mizdow as he would lose the big showdown with Miz less than a month later and pretty much disappear. Big Show on the other hand would do exactly the same thing he’s done for about the last ten years: be treated like a monster and then lose to someone new. Except here of course because Mizdow winning would have been stupid.

Aloe Blacc sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is hosted by LL Cool J and talks about how entertainment has evolved with everyone being connected. The one thing that has stayed the same though is us as we’ve watched moment after moment in the history of Wrestlemania. That generation at the beginning created what we see today and connects us all together. Tonight, these men and women will take the biggest stage and connect us all. This is Wrestlemania. Cool stuff here and it worked very well.

Intercontinental Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Bad News Barrett vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Stardust vs. Luke Harper vs. R-Truth vs. Dean Ambrose

Ladder match and Barrett is defending after issuing a challenge for a bunch of people to fight him. Stardust is Cody Rhodes as an even freakier version of Goldust. Truth is scared of heights and is going to have some issues in this one. It’s a huge brawl to start and Ambrose takes Harper down with a suicide dive. Stardust jumps off the middle rope and lands on a bunch of people (the Falling Star), leaving Harper to dive on everyone but Ambrose.

Dean climbs a ladder and dives on the other six to put all seven of them down. Truth is the first one back in but he can’t bring himself to climb. It’s Barrett with the save but Bryan dropkicks a ladder into him before whipping Stardust into the ladder to crush Barrett even more. The momentum is stopped as Harper throws the ladder at Bryan but he’s able to tie Harper upside down in the ladder for the YES Kicks.

That earns Bryan a superkick from Ziggler and it’s Dean and Dolph going for a climb. Barrett joins them but Stardust takes out the ladder to put everyone down. The fans chant CODY to freak Stardust out so he throws a ladder at Harper. Stardust goes outside and pulls out his own ladder called the, and I quote, Exo-Atmospheric Starbird. In other words, it’s a ladder covered in glitter.

Barrett will have none of that and breaks a rung off to give Stardust a beating. Dean throws the glitter ladder at Barrett and the glitter falls all over the ring. Now it’s time to bring in two small ladders so Harper and Ambrose can have a duel, capped off by a boot to Dean’s face. Harper lays a smaller ladder on the top rope and rams Dean into it face first. The ladder around Luke’s head takes some people out but Truth drop toeholds Harper down, sending him into the ladder.

Truth sets up the big ladder but Stardust goes for the climb, only to get superplexed back down by Barrett. Bryan, Ziggler and Ambrose go up top until Dean drops down and shoves the ladder over. Dean goes up until Harper powerbombs him off the ladder and through a ladder bridged between the barricade and ring. Ziggler tries a sleeper on Harper as he climbs, followed by the Zig Zag to bring them crashing down.

Somehow Dolph is able to climb up, only to have Barrett pull him down into the Bull Hammer. Another one knocks Truth off but Bryan makes a quick climb and kicks Barrett down. Barrett is right back up though and makes a save, followed by a quick running knee from Bryan, allowing him to climb up, headbutt Ziggler off and win the title at 13:55.

Rating: B. Giving Bryan a title (the fifth different one he’s fought for in five years) is a good idea as it lets the fans get it out of their system with a feel good moment. If he hadn’t won here, the fans would have probably hijacked the show with their DANIEL BRYAN chants because if Bryan isn’t the featured attraction, there’s no way they can possibly enjoy the show. Some fans. Anyway, this was exactly what the match should have been: Money in the Bank but for a title. Unfortunately Bryan would get hurt again and be out of action in less than a month, putting him on the shelf indefinitely.

We recap Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton. Rollins broke up the Shield last year and became the Authority’s young ace, which ticked Orton off. This led to a feud with Rollins putting Orton on the shelf (meaning onto a movie set) with a Curb Stomp onto some steps. Then Orton returned and rejoined the Authority for a few weeks, only to turn on them again and attack Rollins to set this up. After all that stupid, they went with a simpler idea: Orton as the original future of the WWE vs. Rollins as the new future.

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Rollins is Mr. Money in the Bank and has Joey Mercury and Jamie Noble as his personal stooges. Seth starts by flipping away from Orton, only to eat a dropkick and bail to the floor from the threat of an RKO. Back in and a big clothesline looks to set up the RKO again but the Stooges offer a distraction to break it up. Orton deals with them early off a double elevated DDT from the apron.

The distraction lets Seth get in his first offense though and Orton is in trouble. A snap suplex gets two and we’re in the chinlock on Orton. Back up and Orton grabs a powerslam, followed by a t-bone suplex to send Rollins to the apron. As luck would have it, he’s in position for the elevated DDT but Seth pops up with an enziguri, followed by an Asai moonsault to put both guys on the floor.

Back in and Randy can’t get a superplex but he’ll settle for a top rope backdrop and a high cross body, only to have Seth roll through for two. A low superkick staggers Orton and Seth tries standing Sliced Bread #2, only to get caught in the RKO for a very close two. That’s a move you don’t see kicked out of very often. The Stooges break up the Punt to keep this PG, allowing Rollins to hit the Curb Stomp for two. Seth tries it again but this time Orton launches him into the air and catches him in the RKO for the pin at 13:15.

Rating: B. Good but not great here with the near falls off the false finishes not having the best heat in the world. That ending is more than worth it though and looked awesome with Orton being able to catch that thing from almost anywhere. Orton is the kind of guy that you can throw in there whenever you need a spot like this and the fans are going to freak out over the RKO every time, especially when it’s something like that. Good stuff.

Ronda Rousey is here.

We recap HHH vs. Sting, which started back at Survivor Series but Sting disappeared for a few months, as is his custom. Sting stood up against the Authority’s corruption so the Authority talked down to him for never being in the big pond before, because WCW’s legacy exists for WWE to stomp on it and beat their chest over the battle that ended fourteen years ago. This turned into a big thing about the Monday Night Wars with Sting being the last soldier from WCW that had to be vanquished.

As a side note, here’s a great example of why Stephanie gets on people’s nerves. On one of the last shows before this match, Sting came out to say that this shouldn’t be about the Monday Night Wars because that would be totally ridiculous. This brought out Stephanie, to insist that it WAS about the Monday Night Wars and barely letting Sting get in another word, because she had spoken and that’s all that mattered.

HHH vs. Sting

No DQ or countout. Sting is played to the ring by some kind of Japanese band with drums and a gong. As you might expect, HHH completely upstages him with a full on Terminator commercial with the robots rising from the stage, a clip from the movie, HHH dressed as a Terminator and Arnold Schwarzenegger himself appearing on screen for the introduction. It might be time to call in Robocop.

They lock up after forty five seconds and a shoulder drops HHH for more stalling. A hiptoss and dropkick put HHH in the corner and Sting is looking better than he has in years. Fans: “YOU STILL GOT IT!” HHH’s right hands and facebuster have little effect as Sting goes for the Scorpion Deathlock (basically a Sharpshooter), sending HHH bailing to the floor. HHH comes back in but gets whipped over the corner as this has been one sided for the first five minutes.

Sting goes to the floor though and the Stinger Splash hits the barricade by mistake, as it’s done all but roughly twice in his career. Back in and HHH whips him across the ring several times until Sting collapses. We hit the chinlock to slow things down again before HHH goes to the middle rope for some reason. He dives into the Scorpion and here’s DX (X-Pac and the New Age Outlaws) for the save.

Sting fights them off with ease and backdrops HHH onto them, setting up a dive off the top (remember that Sting is 56 here) to take them all out. Back in and a Pedigree gets two so HHH gets the sledgehammer (one of at least two under the ring). This brings out the NWO (Hall, Nash and Hogan) to save Sting (SO much wrong with that statement, not even counting trying to remember if the Kliq exists in storylines or not). They take their sweet time and eventually clean house, allowing Sting to hit the Scorpion Death Drop (reverse DDT) for two.

Now the Deathlock goes on and Hogan pulls the sledgehammer away. Gunn takes Nash down and Nash is holding his leg in what almost has to be a rib. Sting tries to put the hold back on but Shawn Michaels runs in for Sweet Chin Music (well the area a few inches in front of the chin that is). HHH only gets two and both guys are done. Shawn hands HHH the hammer but Hall gives Sting a bat for the awesome duel. HHH’s hammer is broken over the bat and Sting pounds away in the corner, only to dive into the sledgehammer to the face for the pin at 18:35.

Rating: B-. This was a blast until the ending which I really didn’t want to see. Of course the quality here was bad but they were never going to get a good match out there so why not just go for the big circus act? I know the logic is that you can’t have Sting come in and beat HHH because he was WCW, but again, IT WAS FOURTEEN YEARS AGO.

Why does anything about the other company matter anymore? Sting came in as a big, fun moment and then it’s HAHA HHH WINS AGAIN! To be fair though, this was his first Wrestlemania win in five years so it’s not like it happens often. Still though, fun stuff but the ending was a punch to the stomach.

Post match HHH shakes Sting’s hand. As in the guy he hit in the face with a hammer two minutes ago. This doesn’t make any sense as HHH is still the corrupt villain, meaning Sting’s original mission should be ongoing. Forget all that though as this was one more rehash of the Monday Night Wars because people still care about that.

Ads for new shows coming to the WWE Network, including the new Divas Search.

Maria Menunos, in a Bushwhackers shirt, brings in Daniel Bryan. First ever Intercontinental Champion Pat Patterson comes in to congratulate him, as do Roddy Piper, Ricky Steamboat, Ric Flair (of course) and Bret Hart, who starts a YES chant. Ron Simmons comes in and scares them all before hitting his catchphrase.

Skylar Grey, Kid Ink and Travis Barker perform the theme songs. Thankfully it wasn’t a full on medley.

AJ Lee/Paige vs. Bella Twins

Real people vs. reality stars (from Total Divas), even though Paige had already become a cast member. Nikki is Divas Champion and in the middle of her reign of doom. Paige debuted at the Raw after Wrestlemania last year and has formed a dream team with AJ to take on the sisters.

Nikki and Paige have a catfight to start with the champ getting the better of it and knocking AJ off the apron. An Alabama Slam gets two on off an Alabama Slam. Brie comes in with a middle rope missile dropkick as the announcers debate the importance of the women not on Total Divas. AJ gets knocked off the apron again and Brie’s running knee to Paige gets two.

Back to Nikki who drops AJ for the third time, followed by the Rack Attack for two on Paige. They’re even kicking out of the finishers in midcard matches now. Paige superkicks Nikki down and both Bellas wind up on the floor, setting up Paige’s flip dive off the apron. The hot tag FINALLY brings in AJ who is quickly slammed down for two but Brie has to save Nikki from the Black Widow. Nikki forearms AJ for two more, only to get caught in the Black Widow for the submission at 6:42.

Rating: C-. This was a handicap match for the first half with Paige cleaning house, which was made even weirder when AJ came in anyway. Not that it mattered though as the Bellas were going to be pushed as the stars as long as they wanted to because of that stupid reality show. In theory this should have set up AJ as the next challenger but she retired later in the week and left the company for good.

We get a tale of the tape for Lesnar vs. Reigns, which Cole says is the result of a computer analysis. The stats include height, weight and career accomplishments. Did this computer analysis take place in the Korean War?

Hall of Fame video, with highlights of Lanny Poffo reading a poem to induct his brother Randy Savage and Connor Michalek receiving the first Warrior Award.

The Class of 2015 includes Rikishi, Larry Zbyszko (mainly famous in the 80s), Alundra Blayze, Connor Michalek, the Bushwhackers (with Butch on crutches but still doing the strut), Tatsumi Fujinami (a legendary Japanese wrestler), Randy Savage (represented by his brother), Arnold Schwarzenegger, and Kevin Nash (for the required Kliq member, though I wonder why he can go in under his real name and not Hall).

We recap John Cena vs. Rusev for the US Title. Rusev, an evil Bulgarian/Russian, won the title late last year and is undefeated. He’s run through all kinds of American stars and even beat Cena via knockout at Fast Lane 2015. Tonight is the big rematch (as granted by Rusev’s manager Lana to plant the seeds for their split) and showdown for the title. This is one of those stories that worked for years and is still working now because it’s such a simple idea.

US Title: Rusev vs. John Cena

Cena is challenging. Rusev’s entrance trumps everything tonight as the Russian military accompanies Lana to the ring before Rusev rolls out IN A TANK. This is so Rocky IV. Cena has a video montage of Presidents of the United States talking about American exceptionalism until Cena walks out. The fans do the always awesome JOHN CENA SUCKS chant to the tune of his music.

The champ spinwheel kicks the American down to start and dives at Cena for a gutwrench suplex (from Rusev in a cool move) for two. A Cannonball in the corner gets the same but Rusev stops to wave the Russian flag. You don’t do that to a real American so Cena kicks him in the face and starts his way too early finishing sequence. The top rope Fameasser gets two but the fans are too busy cheering for Lana to care.

The AA is broken up and a jumping superkick drops Cena cold. Rusev argues with the referee though and Cena hooks a tornado DDT for two more. A quick Alabama Slam (that’s how you do it Nikki) looks to set up the Accolade (Rusev’s camel clutch finisher) but Cena pulls him down into the STF. As Cena does some of the loudest instructing I’ve ever heard (telling Rusev to keep his head up), Lana throws in a shoe for a distraction so Rusev can make the ropes. Seriously, a shoe? You couldn’t like, go yell at him or something? At least it was rather heelish.

Rusev throws him down with a fall away slam, followed by a top rope headbutt of all things for two. He can’t quite get the Accolade though, allowing Cena to kick him away and debut the springboard Stunner for two of his own. Another jumping superkick and a wheelbarrow slam set up the Accolade and the fans are THRILLED. This time Cena powers out and grabs the STF. Lana offers another distraction but Rusev rams into her by mistake, setting up the AA to give Cena the title at 14:43.

Rating: C+. It’s cool to see Cena drop down the card like this as he’s been in the main event for so long now that it’s hard to get into seeing him win the World Title again. The match was good enough even if there was an obvious ending but the Accolade could have stayed on longer. Rusev was built up to lose at a match like this and there’s nothing wrong with that. It would have been interesting to see Rusev escape again here though and have Cena chase him over the summer.

Rusev blames Lana for the loss.

Wrestlemania XXXII is in Dallas.

The pre-show panel talks about the Tag Team Title match and Big Show winning the battle royal. Thanks for reminding me.

Here are HHH and Stephanie to brag about the new attendance record and desperately fill in some time as we have two matches left and nearly an hour and a half to go. Stephanie talks about watching Wrestlemania I live and seeing her friend Andre the Giant (This was a thing for her around this time as she would mention this whenever she could. For some reason this was her justification for not letting Cena be in the Andre battle royal.).

Wrestlemania has grown exponentially since then and it’s all because of the Authority’s leadership. HHH says it’s like he beat everyone here tonight, just like he beat Sting (Buy a ticket, get a hammer to the face!). They own everyone here because the Authority wins. That means they own the people and that means it’s time for the Rock. Cole says Rock has headlined five Wrestlemanias. Are they really still going with the idea that Rock vs. Hogan wasn’t the headliner?

The fans keep cheering until Stephanie asks them to be quiet because we get the idea. Rock tells Stephanie that she doesn’t own the people here, including himself because he was born right around here. As for HHH, he can either go dress up as the Terminator again or they can make a Wrestlemania moment right here and right now. HHH doesn’t seem interested so, just like Rock left his heart in San Francisco, HHH clearly left something back in Connecticut.

Stephanie gets in Rock’s face and says he knows there’s no Rock without the McMahons. Rock’s dad Rocky Johnson would be nowhere without Vince Sr., Vince Jr. and Stephanie. That starts a chant for Shane, which even Cole acknowledges. Rock says that Stephanie would be nowhere without Vince so she slaps him. Stephanie keeps ranting as Rock goes outside……and stands next to Ronda Rousey. Fans: “RONDA’S GONNA KILL YOU!” Rock introduces her to Stephanie but Stephanie says they’re friends already.

Stephanie KEEPS GOING and says this is her ring. Ronda says any ring she steps into is hers so Stephanie can make her leave. Stephanie smiles at her but Rousey gives her a look, which Rock sums up as meaning “she’s going to reach down your throat, pull out your insides and play jump rope with your Fallopian tubes.” HHH tries to interrupt and gets beaten down, including a hiptoss from Rousey. Stephanie loads up the slap but gets her arm bent back with as little force as possible, likely due to UFC contract stipulations. Rousey and Rock stand tall.

There’s no time to recap Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker but it’s what you would expect: Bray wants to be the new evil monster and Undertaker stands in his way. The interesting note here is Bray sprained the heck out of his ankle earlier in the day so he’s nowhere near 100%.

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

The awesome entrances continue (well as awesome as a guy holding a lantern when it’s still daylight can be) as Bray walks down the ramp and passes a string of zombies who come to life as he goes by. Undertaker has grown some hair back and looks like he did in 2002. Bray charges into a boot before the bell, though that might be all that ankle can handle for the match.

Some driving shoulders set up Old School (notice that Undertaker’s offense here keeps Bray from having to stand alone) but a running clothesline puts Undertaker on the floor. He lands on his feet though and pulls Bray out to keep up the beating. The apron legdrop staggers Bray even more but he breaks up the big boot with his running cross body. Bray takes his time pounding Undertaker down which makes sense coming from him.

The ankle is fine enough for a running splash in the corner but Bray drops down and puts on a chinlock. For someone as banged up as he is, this is a solid performance from Wyatt. Undertaker’s head is rammed into the post but Bray goes down and holds his ankle. I don’t know why they didn’t do a quick angle during the match to explain the injury. Back in and Bray can’t stand at first.

Undertaker grabs Hell’s Gate but Bray punches his way out before it goes on full. A release Rock Bottom sets up the backsplash for two on Undertaker. Sister Abigail is countered into a chokeslam followed by a Tombstone for two. These near falls are WAY past overdone so far tonight. Another Tombstone is countered into Sister Abigail to freak Bray out even more. Bray does his spider bridge up but Undertaker sits up and glares into Wyatt’s eyes, sending Bray wilting to the mat in a perfect reaction. Bray actually wins a slugout but Sister Abigail is countered into a second Tombstone to give Undertaker the pin at 15:06.

Rating: C+. This match told me a few things. First and foremost, last year’s match was so bad because of the injury. Undertaker looked like his old (emphasis on that word) self here and was nowhere near as off as he was last year. Unfortunately it also tells me that Bray isn’t going to move up the card any time soon.

With the Streak over there’s no real reason for Undertaker to win here, other than to give the fans a feel good moment. Bray was trying as hard as he could on one leg but he could only get so far. Finally, Undertaker is missing something now that the Streak is gone. 21-1 still sounds impressive but it’s just not the same.

Ad for Extreme Rules.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar. Brock has been unstoppable lately after squashing Cena to win the title at Summerslam 2014. Reigns won the Royal Rumble to earn the shot, despite being LOATHED by the crowd at this point. The idea became about him trying to honor his family’s history and legacy which worked to a degree, but no matter what they did, it was still Brock Lesnar on the other side and people wanted to see him massacre Reigns in every way he could think of.

The other problem for Reigns is he hasn’t really earned the spot. Aside from the Rumble, his only major win was last month over Daniel Bryan. This really wasn’t the strongest build in the world and is boiling down to Brock suplexes a lot and Reigns hits him a lot. Roman has been told he can’t beat Brock and his motivation is to prove him wrong. That’s the extent of his motivation and that’s not enough for the main event of Wrestlemania.

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns

Brock is defending of course. We do the big match intros and Reigns is booed out of the building, following by the fans to quote Heyman’s intro along with him. Roman goes right at Brock to start but gets driven into the corner, setting up the first German suplex. Brock is already bleeding but he hits the F5 inside of thirty seconds. A release fisherman’s suplex sends Reigns flying but he elbows out of a German, drawing incredible booing from the crowd.

Brock no sells a clothesline and now the German sends Reigns across the ring again. Reigns smiles at Brock, earning himself a belly to back suplex and Brock debuting the “SUPLEX CITY” line. Right hands don’t bother Brock either as another German drops Reigns again. Roman keeps smiling so Brock breaks it up with a release German. The fans think this is awesome as Brock forearms Reigns off the apron and into the barricade. As he gets back in, Reigns scores with a knee to the ribs, followed by some kicks to the face but Brock catches a foot and knocks Reigns silly with a clothesline.

A belly to belly overhead brings Reigns back in over the top rope but Reigns shakes his head at Brock again. Another F5 gets two and now Brock take the gloves off. Some hard slaps put Reigns down but he tells Brock to bring it on. Another German earns him another bring it on so Brock gives him suplex number ten. The third F5 gets two more, putting Reigns past Undertaker last year. Brock takes Roman outside but Reigns posts him, drawing some real blood from Lesnar.

Back in and Brock is wobbly so Roman its two straight Superman Punches. That gets him to a knee but Reigns has to elbow out of another German. The third Superman Punch puts Brock down and there’s the spear. Brock is up though so a second spear gets a VERY close two. Heyman is on his knees praying as the fans are booing Roman even more. A fourth Superman Punch is countered into a fourth F5…….AND HERE COMES SETH ROLLINS TO CASH IN MONEY IN THE BANK!

WWE World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns vs. Seth Rollins

The Curb Stomp puts Brock down but Reigns has to spear Brock down to save Seth from an F5. Another Curb Stomp (and a whisper of “thank you so much” to Reigns) gives Seth the title at 16:43!

Rating: A-. They went in a TOTALLY different direction here and it was the best thing they possibly could have done. Reigns vs. Lesnar had little interest as a match but as a one sided war with Reigns giving it everything he had near the end, they turned it into one of the most dramatic spectacles you could find. They had me on the near fall after that second spear and I lost it when Rollins came out.

That ending was a stroke of brilliance as they didn’t want to job Lesnar but they didn’t want to give Reigns the title yet. Rollins had been the wrestler of the year in 2014 and it made much better sense to give him the credit that he deserved for it here. Great drama, great action, and a way better match that it had any right to be.

Fireworks and posing take us out.

Overall Rating: B+. I actually liked this show a lot more live, which probably had a lot to do with the expectations being so low coming in. With more time to think about it and the shock of the cash in being gone, it’s still a really strong show that FAR exceeded expectations. The main event was great and most of the other stuff was good. Aside from the main event there really isn’t a big blow away match though and that hurts things a bit.

The entire show was set up differently this year as there were very few backstage segments and the show was able to fly by otherwise. However, there was that big twenty plus minute segment with Rock/HHH/Stephanie and that’s what caused a big part of this show’s problem: it’s too long.

Counting the two hour pre-show and it’s nearly thirty minutes of wrestling, this show runs nearly six hours. It doesn’t matter if it’s the greatest show you’ve ever watched; that’s too long. There had to be something that could be cut in here (hint: it was the long part that didn’t involve a match), even though none of the matches broke twenty minutes. Between the big talking segment and the live performance, which still adds nothing to the show, there’s too much in here and it makes for a very long sit.

Overall though, this was a major surprise and a better show than it had any right to be. The low expectations helped it a lot, but this was looking like one of the worst Wrestlemanias in history and wound up being a lot of fun. Nothing on it really stands out above the rest (save for maybe the main event) so the whole is greater than the sum of all its parts. Really fun show here.

Ratings Comparison

New Day vs. Los Matadores vs. Usos vs. Cesaro/Tyson Kidd

Original: C+

Redo: B

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: D+

Redo: D

Intercontinental Title Ladder Match

Original: B

Redo: B

Seth Rollins vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: B

Sting vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: B-

Paige/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Rusev vs. John Cena

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Bray Wyatt vs. Undertaker

Original: B

Redo: C+

Roman Reigns vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: B+

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A

Redo: B+

Yeah the shock had a lot to do with it but there was good stuff throughout.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/03/29/wrestlemania-xxxi-shock-and-awe-shock-and-awe/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

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