Survivor Series Count-Up – 1995 (2020 Redo): That Is Scary

Survivor Series 1995
Date: November 19, 1995
Location: USAir Arena, Landover, Maryland
Attendance: 14,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Mr. Perfect, Jim Ross

It’s time for the annual redo and I’m curious to see what we’re going to see here. We have some big stuff on the show, including Diesel defending the WWF Title against Bret Hart in a match whose result should be pretty clear after how badly Diesel’s last big title defense went. Let’s get to it.

Mr. Perfect gets a big intro to do commentary. That’s quite the different way to start things off, though it’s how Gorilla Monsoon and Jesse Ventura came out to open the first Survivor Series so points for likely unintentional tradition.

The opening video looks at Diesel vs. Bret Hart, which is all that matters on this show.

Underdogs vs. BodyDonnas

Underdogs: Barry Horowitz, Bob Holly, Hakushi, Marty Jannetty

BodyDonnas: 1-2-3 Kid, Skip, Tom Prichard, Rad Radford

And they wonder why things were falling apart at the moment. Sunny handles the BodyDonnas’ intros, though Radford is only a BodyDonna in training and Prichard isn’t Zip yet. The Kid is kind of on loan from Ted DiBiase, who paid off Jean Pierre LaFitte for the spot, and is here as well. Cue Razor Ramon to go after the Kid, who recently turned on him so things aren’t going so well for them. Marty and Prichard start things off with Marty being taken into and having to fight out of the corner in a hurry.

Tom accidentally knees Kid off the apron and Sunny needs to start the rally clap. Holly comes in with a hurricanrana on Radford (Perfect: “Now that was a good looking wrestling move.”) and it’s an armdrag into an armbar. It’s off to Hakushi (for a very positive reaction) but Radford plants him with a spinebuster. Kid comes in to a far more negative reaction and hits the quick legdrop before handing it off to Skip. The belly to back superplex is countered into a crossbody though and it’s off to Holly vs. Prichard. Granted the fans want Barry, but they seem happy to see Prichard missing a moonsault.

That’s enough for Holly to go up with the high crossbody to get rid of Prichard at 5:40. Skip is right back in with a rollup to pin Holly at 5:47 though and we’re tied up again. Hakushi comes back in and kicks away at Skip but the Vader Bomb hits knees. Skip’s super hurricanrana connects but he falls down as well, meaning it’s Kid coming in to kick away. You don’t do that with Hakushi though, as he fires off the strikes and hits a running headbutt for two (JR: “He almost knocked the price tag off the Kid!” Good line.).

The springboard splash misses though and we go split screen to watch an annoyed Ramon and company. It’s going to be made even worse when the Kid kicks Hakushi in the back of the head so Radford can get the pin (with tights) at 8:32. Barry comes in and gets beaten down because he’s Barry Horowitz and that’s all you should have expected. Some right hands stagger Kid but he hands it off to Radford for a gutwrench suplex.

For some reason Skip tells Radford not to pin him, which is only going to go badly. I mean not as badly as being named Skip but how much lower can you go? Radford stops for some pushups and of course Barry grabs a three quarter nelson (as so many people grab) for the pin at 11:50. That gives us the, ahem, epic Barry vs. Skip showdown (yes I do feel stupid writing that) but the Kid gets a blind tag and knees Barry down.

The running legdrop finishes Barry at 12:48 (yes off a legdrop, because Barry Horowitz), leaving us with Skip/Kid vs. Marry. That’s a main event in most flea markets in the country, especially if the person putting the show together wants to get creative. Or if Marty’s partner got lost and started talking to a nice moose. Skip misses a charge into the corner but is fine enough to elbow Jannetty down. They go up top and Marty goes huge with a super powerbomb (dang) for the pin at 15:22.

The Kid is right in there to kick Marty in the head over and over, but a Swanton misses to put them both down. Marty is back up with a dropkick for two….and here’s Sid, also part of DiBiase’s Corporation. The fans chant for Razor as the Rocker Dropper gives Marty two. That’s enough for DiBiase to get on the apron and offer a distraction though, meaning Sid can snap Marty’s throat across the top to give Kid the pin at 19:08.

Rating: D+. If this is their big opener, they’re in a lot more trouble than I thought. This was nothing to see whatsoever, with the wrestling being fine at best and the story being rather pathetic. We’re supposed to get excited about a team whose most successful member is Marty Jannetty with Barry Horowitz as captain? To start a pay per view? I know 1995 was bad but come on now. Not a good start here and I’m almost scared to see the rest.

Post match Sid and Kid celebrate in a somewhat funny bit.

Razor Ramon breaks a lot of stuff over Kid and company winning.

Camp Cornette and Dean Douglas aren’t happy with Razor being annoyed before tonight’s Wild Card match (a cool concept where the teams were fairly random, so of course they never did it again). Owen says Razor needs to get his priorities straight and Dean says they’re going to be fighting without a team member.

Team Aja Kong vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Aja Kong, Bertha Faye, Lioness Asuka, Tomoko Watanabe

Alundra Blayze, Chaparita Asari, Kyoko Inoue, Sakie Hasagawa

Yeah I think this might be better, as the women are making a short term visit from Japan to try and make the women’s division mean something. I mean it didn’t work, but it was worth a try. Kind of like Vince calling a match like this, but thankfully JR is in there to help carry things. Harvey Wippleman is here with Kong’s team and Blayze is Women’s Champion.

Asuka goes straight to a giant swing on Asari to start but it’s quickly off to Blayze, whose who into the ropes….doesn’t quite work as Asuka falls down. Odd visual but a slam works a bit better, seeing up the Sky Twister Press from Asari. The German suplex gets rid of Asuka at 1:43 so they’re starting fast.

Watanabe comes in to stomp away but Blayze sends her outside for the big dive from the top. Back in and Hasagawa rolls some butterfly suplexes but Watanabe is back with a top rope seated senton. Kong comes in and slugs Watanabe down but she snaps off a German suplex for a breather. A quick Saito suplex gets rid of Hasagawa at 3:59. Asari comes in and gets slammed, setting up a middle rope splash for the pin at 4:25.

That sets up the Blayze vs. Kong showdown but it’s off to Inoue after about five seconds of slug out. Kong quickly counters a sunset flip by sitting on Inoue’s chest for the pin at 5:04 and Blayze is on her own. Faye, one of the more disgusting ideas that WWE ever had (see, she’s fat and stupid but she’s strong so it works), comes in to stomp away but Blayze piledrives Watanabe (originally a powerbomb but Blayze couldn’t get her up) for the pin at 6:31.

Bertha comes in again to kick at Blayze’s leg but some heel miscommunication lets Blayze hit a German suplex to pin Faye at 7:12. Faye doesn’t seem to mind as she leaves Kong to headbutt Blayze. A superplex gives Kong two and some hip thrusts in the corner have Blayze in more trouble. She’s right back up to kick Kong down and a standing moonsault gets two. Blayze catches her on top but gets shoved down, setting up the spinning backfist for the pin at 10:03. Now play that Orient Express music!

Rating: C+. The action was WAY better but there’s only so much you can do with seven falls in ten minutes. The women’s division basically didn’t exist outside of Blayze, Faye and whomever else they brought in from Japan at this point, which is probably why the division was dead in a few months. This was a very fun change of pace, but there’s only so much you can do with this many time restraints.

The Bill Clinton impersonator is here and I’m still not sure why…until he thinks Bam Bam Bigelow is from the Flintstones. Yeah this is Vince show.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Goldust

Goldust has only been around for about a month and promises a great performance that will make you remember his name. After a quick stall to start, Goldust hammers away a bit and then bails to the floor to mess with Bigelow’s bald head. Back in and Bigelow hammers away to send Goldust outside again.

The fight is on with Goldust hitting the post but he’s fine enough to take it back inside and clothesline Bigelow to the floor. The front facelock goes on for a bit before Goldust throws him outside (again). Back in and Bigelow gets in a belly to back suplex but Goldust slaps on a reverse chinlock. That’s broken up with an electric chair but Goldust is right back up with the bulldog for the pin at 8:32.

Rating: D. It would take Goldust some time to really get the hang of things and we weren’t to that point yet. Goldust was more of a movie guy here instead of the weird guy he would become, which was what worked when he meshed it together with the movie stuff. The problem is his wrestling consisted of throwing Bigelow to the floor and then hitting a bulldog, which isn’t quite thrilling. This was it for Bigelow as well and he was eventually off to ECW.

Bob Backlund visits the Clinton impersonator and wants to know why he’s here.

We recap the Royals (Mabel) vs. the Dark Side (Undertaker). Mabel and Yokozuna crushed Undertaker’s face and now it’s time for revenge.

Royals vs. Dark Side

Royals: King Mabel, Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Isaac Yankem

Dark Side: Undertaker, Savio Vega, Henry Godwinn, Fatu

So it’s the Royals vs. the Bone Street Krew. This is Undertaker’s return after a month away due to the crushed face and he has a big skull mask on as a result. Fatu and Helmsley start things off with Fatu hitting a backdrop into a clothesline. A very early Pedigree attempt is cut off with a stare from Undertaker so it’s off to Godwinn to scare Lawler away. Yankem comes in to stomp Godwinn down but Henry is right back up with a clothesline. The jumping elbow gets two but Yankem hits a belly to back suplex.

Helmsley comes in for some uppercuts as we hear about how is still undefeated (dang that makes me feel so old). Godwinn gets in a rather delayed gorilla press and throws Helmsley into the corner for the tag off to Lawler. Vega comes in as well and Lawler starts bouncing off of him like a pinball. Lawler manages a kick to the face and celebrates so Vega knocks him down again. It’s off to Fatu to work on Lawler’s arm but a cheap shot from the apron cuts him off. Yankem gets in the jumping elbow but Mabel misses the charge in the corner, allowing Vega to hammer away.

A big Boss Man Slam cuts that off and Vega gets caught in the corner. Yankem comes back in and hits a dropkick (!), followed by a knee from Helmsley (, at best) for two. Vega manages a Rock Bottom to Helmsley but Lawler, fearing a bad case of death, cuts off the hot tag to Undertaker. The piledriver plants Vega….but he pops up and brings in Undertaker to start the destruction.

Lawler’s partners all run away and it’s the Tombstone for the first elimination at 12:20. Yankem tries to deck Undertaker but gets caught with the jumping clothesline, setting up the Tombstone for the pin at 12:43 (and they were never seen together again). Now it’s Helmsley coming in and being scared off by a single glare.

Helmsley tries to leave but gets sent back to the apron, where Undertaker chokeslams him back inside (good one too) for the pin at 13:36. That leaves Mabel on his own and he hits the belly to belly suplex. The legdrop, which crushed Undertaker’s face, connects….and Undertaker sits up. That’s enough for Mabel, who runs off for the countout at 14:25.

Rating: B-. It’s rare to have the first twelve minutes of a match be absolutely nothing but the last two and a half minutes completely save the match. Undertaker was a wrecking ball here and there was no one touching him. I’ve been watching wrestling for over thirty years and a ticked off Undertaker is the scariest thing that I have ever seen. I loved the Undertaker stuff here and I was getting excited watching it all over again. It’s a great ending and Undertaker can destroy Mabel once and for all before finally finding a great opponent. Like Mankind for instance.

Post match Undertaker chokeslams Mo to blow off some steam.

Bret Hart isn’t worried about British Bulldog next month because he’s ready to face Diesel and knows what’s coming. He feels like Wayne Gretzky, who has to find out if he still has this every year. Tonight, Diesel is finding out that he can’t hang with him.

Diesel is ready to face Bret because he doesn’t need to go long with Bret. He doesn’t get paid by the hour and it’s all power tonight.

Jim Cornette, now with the other team, says he’s been here all day and Ted DiBiase just wants to win. Shawn Michaels comes in to say he’s got this and Ahmed Johnson doesn’t say anything, thank goodness.

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Shawn Michaels, Ahmed Johnson, British Bulldog, Sycho Sid

Yokozuna, Owen Hart, Razor Ramon, Dean Douglas

Ted DiBiase is with Sid and company while Jim Cornette is trying to figure out who he is supposed to help here. Shawn gets a great pop and it’s no shock that he was on the way to the main event. Commentary uses this chance to make jokes about the government balancing a budget because of course they do. Owen and Shawn start things up with Shawn sending him to the floor and giving Cornette a spank with the tennis racket. Back in and Owens hits a belly to belly to cut Shawn off and it’s Dean coming in to slug away.

Shawn takes him down anyway and hits the top rope ax handle, only to get punched in the face again. Dean’s Vader Bomb misses though and Shawn hits a moonsault press for two. Johnson comes in and gets triple teamed with Dean grabbing a chinlock. Back up and a powerslam plants Dean for no cover, even Ahmed poses over Dean after putting him down. Shawn comes back in and the threat of the superkick sends Dean bailing to the floor. Razor isn’t having that and punches Dean into the rollup for the pin at 7:28.

Owen charges in but gets drop toeholded so Shawn can tag Bulldog in. A spinwheel kick cuts Bulldog down and it’s quickly off to Shawn vs. Razor, which is treated as a big showdown. Eh fair enough after the two matches they had. Shawn ducks a clothesline and hits an elbow in the face but Razor hits a very quick Razor’s Edge. Johnson makes the save so Razor hits a running knee lift to put Shawn down. For some reason it puts Razor down as well so Shawn brings in Sid to hammer away in the corner.

Yokozuna comes in for a cheap shot but Sid doesn’t mind and stays on Razor’s back. A double clothesline puts both of them down so Sid goes up top, only to get slammed off the top. Razor gets in a few right hands (I’ve always liked those) but Sid hits a quick chokeslam. Shawn comes in to superkick Razor but hits Sid by mistake. He doesn’t seem to mind so Bulldog….legdrops Sid by mistake, allowing Razor to get the pin at 16:17.

Bulldog comes in to beat on Razor as Sid powerbombs Shawn, allowing Razor to get two. The fresh Owen gets the tag and stays on Shawn’s back before Yokozuna hammers Shawn down in the corner (Perfect: “Welcome back to Syracuse Shawn!”). We hit the nerve hold for a bit before Yoko and Owen hit a double headbutt. Owen misses the diving headbutt though and now the hot tag can bring in Ahmed to clean house. The Pearl River Plunge gets rid of Owen at 21:47.

Razor comes in to slug away at Ahmed (a match between those two could have been interesting) but Ahmed doesn’t know how to STAND IN ONE PLACE for the middle rope bulldog, meaning Razor has to settle for a regular bulldog instead. Likely frustrated by Ahmed being kind of awful, Razor punches Bulldog and Shawn but walks into a spinebuster. Cornette offers a distraction though and it’s the Razor’s Edge to Ahmed. Bulldog breaks that up but here are Sid and the Kid as Razor comes back with the fall away slam.

The distraction lets Bulldog hit the running powerslam for the pin, leaving us with Shawn/Bulldog/Johnson vs. Yokozuna. It’s Shawn getting pounded into the corner to start, which certainly pleases Cornette. Yokozuna drops the big leg but the Banzai Drop only hits mat. The falling tag brings in Ahmed for a slam (less of a slam than Lex Luger’s) but Bulldog makes the save. Shawn and Ahmed get rid of him and it’s the superkick into a screaming splash from Ahmed for the pin at 27:24.

Rating: C. I really liked the idea here and it’s something that could have been done again for years, but for some reason it was only a one off. That being said, the match certainly had some problems, including Johnson looking like he had no idea what he was doing half the time. The match also just kind of came and went without much of a flow. Cool concept, but only a decent execution.

Clinton hits on Sunny and easy jokes are made.

We recap Bret Hart vs. Diesel for the WWF Title. They have had two great matches before as Bret knows how to take the giant down but Diesel is good at the power stuff so it is time for the big showdown. Bret says one of their matches went to a no contest so it’s his title, which Diesel doesn’t see to agree with.

Commentary plays up the technical vs. power here and it makes a lot of sense.

WWF Title: Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Bret is challenging and anything goes. They both unhook turnbuckle pads to start and it’s Diesel hammering away in the corner. That’s enough to send Bret outside so Diesel drops him face first onto the barricade. Bret gets choked against said barricade but he kicks at the leg back inside. Diesel cuts that off with a right hand to the head and then whips him hard into the steps. A chair to the back drops Bret again as it’s one sided in the first few minutes.

The Jackknife is blocked and Bret starts biting to change things up. A choke on Diesel’s back has some more success and now it’s time to kick at the leg. There’s an elbow to the knee and Bret cranks on it for a bonus. Some cannonballs down onto the leg make it even worse and we hit the Figure Four. Diesel grabs a rope and Vince says it has to be broken, but Perfect accurately points out that it doesn’t because there’s no DQ threat to make Bret do anything.

Bret lets it go anyway but it’s way too early for the Sharpshooter. Diesel kicks him away and into the buckle so it’s a bunch of forearms to put Bret down. Unfortunately it puts him down in the corner, where he slides to the floor so Diesel can have his leg wrapped around the post. Bret gets creative by whipping out a cable and tying Diesel’s leg to the post, earning himself a boot to the face. It doesn’t seem to matter much though as Bret gets in a middle rope shot to the face.

The chair is brought in and is promptly kicked into Bret’s face but Diesel is still tied to the post. Bret unloads on him with the chair, including some shots to the knee. Diesel slams him off the top though and unties himself, setting up a big whip into the corner. Vince: “Bret should give up!” Well then tell someone to ring the bell Vince. Diesel can’t hit the running crotch attack so he jumps down onto his back instead.

Snake Eyes drops Bret again but he’s back with right hands to the face. Bret’s middle rope bulldog gets two and Diesel heads to the floor, where he misses the slingshot dive. Diesel knocks him hard off the apron and through the announcers’ table (I believe debuting the spot), leaving Bret mostly dead. Back in and Bret collapses when Diesel tries the Jackknife…and then small packages him for the pin and the title at 24:02. Diesel: “MOTHERF*****!”

Post match Diesel snaps and powerbombs Bret before hitting a referee.

Rating: B+. These two had some great chemistry together and that was on display again here. Bret could brawl when he needed to and he mixed that in with taking apart the knee to have a great match. It also helps when you have him in there to walk Diesel through everything, which is what makes their matches work so well. Diesel could be brought up to another level and there was no one who could do that better than Bret. It was WAY past time to change the title though and thank goodness they did it here.

We get the highlight package….and then go back to commentary for a recap of the heel turn and the sign off. That’s different.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a really weird show as I would have thought only the main event bailed everything out but the rest of the show is mostly good, with only the opener and Goldust vs. Bigelow being pretty bad. The show just doesn’t feel that important and it comes off more as a show that was good in spite of itself, which is rarely a good thing. The main event is good and Undertaker cleaning house is great, but nothing else stands out here in the slightest.

Ratings Comparison

BodyDonnas vs. Underdogs

Original: A-

2012 Redo: B

2020 Redo: D+

Team Bertha Faye vs. Team Alundra Blayze

Original: D

2012 Redo: Redo: C+

2020 Redo: C+

Goldust vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: C

2012 Redo: F

2020 Redo: D

Dark Side vs. Royals

Original: B-

2012 Redo: D+

2020 Redo: B-

Team Shawn Michaels vs. Team Yokozuna

Original: C+

2012 Redo: C+

2020 Redo: C

Bret Hart vs. Diesel

Original: C+

2012 Redo: A

2020 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: B

2020 Redo: C+

Where in the world was I on that first match???

Here’s the original if you are interested:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2020/10/30/survivor-series-count-up-1995-original-bret-vs-the-giant/

And the 2012 redo:

https://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/03/survivor-series-count-up-1995-wild-card/

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1994 (2012 Redo): Make Your Own Chuck Norris Jokes

Survivor Series 1994
Date: November 23, 1994
Location: Freeman Coliseum, San Antonio, Texas
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Gorilla Monsoon

We’re rapidly approaching a new era in the WWF but we aren’t quite there yet. The main event tonight is Yokozuna vs. Undertaker in their second casket match of the year with Chuck Norris, yes that Chuck Norris, as the special outside enforcer. Other than that we’ve got Bret defending the title against the now insane Bob Backlund in a submission match. There are also two five on five Survivor Series matches and a four on four version as well. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from earlier today of the team captains giving their teams pep talks.

Gorilla and Vince are dressed as cowboys. Gorilla looks like he could almost pull the look off but Vince looks like a schnook.

Teamsters vs. Bad Guys

Diesel, Shawn Michaels, Owen Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jeff Jarrett

Razor Ramon, 1-2-3 Kid, British Bulldog, Headshrinkers

Diesel and Shawn are tag champions but they’ve having issues. Owen and Neidhart are a semi-regular tag team. This version of the Headshrinkers is Fatu and Sione, more famous as Rikishi and the Barbarian. Razor is IC Champion. I didn’t know that for sure but it’s the mid 90s so I took a shot in the dark. Shawn keeps slipping in front of Diesel to steal the spotlight. That’ll become important later.

It takes awhile to decide who starts before we get Kid vs. Owen. This should be good. The fans chant 1-2-3 which sounds something like RVD. Before there’s any contact it’s off to Neidhart which won’t be as interesting. Neidhart hits a shoulder block to start but gets dropkicked down. Another shoulder gives the Anvil control though and it’s off to Jarrett. Things speed up a bit and Jarrett loses the advantage Neidhart got him.

Off to Sione, who is someone I’ve talked about before but I’ll do it again here. This guy continuously had work for nearly fifteen years, which is impressive when you consider how basic the main character he played was. The guy was always around though other than in the dying days of WCW. Anyway here he gets dropkicked in the back but powers out of the cover with ease.

Off to Owen who wants the Bulldog. Davey comes in to a big ovation and they trade insane counters to wristlocks. Owen gets catapulted into the good guy corner, which is actually the Bad Guy corner, but the Bad Guys are the good guys in the match if that makes sense. Bulldog gets kicked in the face by Hart and it’s off to Neidhart for a double clothesline. Then Bulldog hits a double clothesline on Hart and Anvil, followed by the delayed vertical on Neidhart.

Fatu hits a top rope headbutt for no cover. Instead he tries to take his own boot off because he’s used to wrestling barefoot. Jarrett comes in and is immediately powerslammed before it’s off to Razor. Jeff immediately bails and it’s Razor vs….Jarrett still. Double J takes Razor to the mat and MESSES WITH HIS HAIR! Oh he’s so EVIL! A big right hand by Razor staggers Jeff and a clothesline puts him on the floor. This is a very hot crowd so far.

Back in and Jarrett escapes an atomic drop and punches Razor in the face to get himself in even more trouble. Off to the Kid who Razor gives a fall away slam to send him straight into Jeff in a cool move. Jeff hooks an abdominal stretch with some cheating from Shawn. That eventually gets caught and the Kid hooks a stretch of his own which doesn’t last long. Off to Fatu vs. Owen but all of the Canadian offense results in Samoan dancing.

A blind tag is made to Diesel and it’s a clothesline and a Jackknife to take out Fatu. Kid runs in and hits a dropkick but a top rope sunset flip is easily countered into a chokebomb. Jackknife finishes Kid a second later. Here’s Sione to pound away but he can only stagger the big man. ANOTHER Jackknife makes it 5-2. Diesel put out three guys in 70 seconds. Bulldog comes in and pounds away but a big boot puts Smith on the floor where he brawls with Owen to a countout.

So it’s Ramon vs. all five guys and he starts with Diesel. A discus punch puts Diesel down as does a middle rope bulldog. Diesel gets a clothesline in to take Razor down and Shawn screams for a Jackknife. The future Outsiders slug it out but Diesel drops him on the buckle in a snake eyes. Ramon comes back with a slam and calls for the Edge but Diesel easily backdrops him down. A big boot puts Razor down and there’s the Jackknife.

NOW Shawn wants in but he asks Diesel to hold Razor. Those of you paying attention should know what’s coming, and there it is as Shawn superkicks Diesel by mistake. Apparently this has happened a few times before and Diesel is MAD. Diesel destroys the rest of his team and stalks Shawn up the aisle. Ramon is the only one left in the ring and somehow the countout eliminates EVERYONE on the Teamsters to make Razor the sole survivor.

Rating: C. This was all angle and not much wrestling. This was the big face turn for Diesel which would result in the world title incredibly soon after this. It was a face turn that made sense too as he was tired of Shawn telling him what to do and getting hurt as a result, so he gave up and went after Shawn. Ticked off giants are very fun, so the first few months of Diesel Power were fun stuff. It was the other eight or nine months that stopped being fun.

Shawn leaves in the back and says Diesel is nothing without him. Diesel is on his way to Shawn’s car. Shawn speeds away, which would actually dissolve the team and vacate the tag titles in the process.

Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us

Jerry Lawler, Queasy, Sleazy, Cheesy

Doink, Dink, Wink, Pink

We’ve got midgets. Great. In case you can’t tell, they’re three small Lawlers and three small clowns. Lawler tells the fans to NOT chant Burger King at him, because he’s a master at baiting a crowd you know. The big guys start and guess what the fans are chanting. Here’s the first ten minutes of the match: Lawler and Doink do something, Jerry takes over, the small clowns interfere and Lawler gets mad and loses the advantage.

Lawler tries an enziguri but Doink ducks to send Jerry hiding in his corner. Jerry yells at his partners and the Clowns are all laying on the ropes. Jerry gets Doink down and has the small Lawlers run over him. They make faces at the clowns then run back over Doink and crash in a pile. Keep I mind that these other kings have facial and chest hair. Jerry yells at them again and it’s back to the big guys fighting some more.

The small clowns all come in and cover Jerry with Doink counting. Lawler is all ticked off so they do the EXACT SAME SEQUENCE with Jerry counting Doink’s shoulders. Jerry can’t catch Cheesy when Doink kicks him off so Cheesy gets a two count on Lawler with Dink counting. Doink puts a Burger King crown on Lawler to make him even madder. Dink gets on Doink’s shoulders and (this isn’t a typo) Jerry gets on Sleazy’s shoulders which goes as well as you would expect it to.

The big guys have a test of strength and it turns into a big crisscross between the little guys. Lawler gets a non-existent foreign object to take over but it’s time for a chase scene! Jerry reverses a cross body and rolls up Doink with a handful of tights to eliminate the big guy. Lawler isn’t allowed to be in the ring with one of the smaller guys so the match is in essence over already.

It’s Queasy vs. Dink to start the second half of the match and Dink gets his arm bitten. Queasy gets his tights bitten as does Lawler. Now it’s Cheesy vs. Wink with Wink pulling on the beard. Lawler blocks a monkey flip and Cheesy pins Wink off a rollup. A minute later, Lawler drops Cheesy on Pink from six feet in the air for the pin and it’s Dink vs. all four of them. Pink hides under the ring instead of leaving as Dink beats up all three little guys. A top rope cross body looks to pin Cheesy but Lawler makes the save. Sleazy gets the easy pin to win it.

Rating: S. As in stupider, which I now am having watched this. Last year’s show at least had full sized people in there having these matches and it only ran ten minutes. This ran SIXTEEN MINUTES and wasted Jerry freaking Lawler on it. I’ll take ANYTHING after this and like it more than this.

Jerry says he won the match and not the other ones. They celebrate anyway and Lawler keeps yelling, so they turn on him and the clowns join in for a six on one beatdown. The big payoff is Doink hitting Lawler with a pie. This ran nearly TWENTY MINUTES out of a two hour and forty minute show.

We get clips of Alundra Blayze vs. Bull Nakano in Tokyo with Nakano winning the Women’s Title in front of 45,000 people. I’ve never seen it but I’ve heard that match was awesome. Nakano comes in and speaks some Japanese. Todd (Petingill, this generation’s Josh Matthews/Matt Striker) does the stupid thing where he speaks loudly because all foreigners are deaf apparently.

WWF World Title: Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Bret is defending and this is a submission match. This is a special kind of submission match though as both guys have seconds and you have to throw in the towel to end the match. Bret has British Bulldog and Backlund has Owen Hart. Backlund was making a comeback in his 40s and was a plucky face before going completely insane and claiming that he was still champion from when his reign ended in 1983 because his manager threw in the towel and he never gave up. Bret and Owen’s parents are in the crowd. Remember that.

Backlund charges at Bret but gets hipblocked down a few times. Bret headbutts him to the floor and elbowed upon return. Hart hits something like an elevated bulldog (think Orton’s hanging DDT) to take over on the mat. Off to a chinlock which evolves into a headlock. Gorilla talks about how Bulldog beat Bret for the IC Title in 92 to try to draw in some tension. Backlund tries to take him to the mat but Bret puts the headlock back on. Bob tries to get the chickenwing on but Bret suplexes him down.

Sharpshooter doesn’t work so Bret goes with a front facelock instead. Off to an abdominal stretch by the Hitman but Bob escapes and goes after the left arm. The chickenwing is escaped again (Backlund’s finisher is a Cross Face Chicken Wing) so Bob bends the arm around the ropes. Off to an armbar on the mat but Bret nips up. Backlund drills Bret to the floor but Hart gets the advantage out there.

Back in and Backlund puts the arm on as the fans all chant LET’S GO BRET. The armbar stays on for a good while (as in like five minutes) before Bret escapes with an atomic drop. He can’t get the Sharpshooter but he settles for the Figure Four. This hold stays on for awhile also and Bob gives up but Owen has to throw in the towel. Backlund tells Owen to throw it in but Owen won’t do it.

Backlund finally turns it over and Owen tells Bulldog to throw it in. Bret reverses it back but Backlund gets to a rope. Bret stays on the leg but can’t get the Sharpshooter. Backlund grabs a piledriver out of nowhere and momentum shifts again. Bob goes for the Chicken Wing but Bret gets to the ropes. We’re about twenty minutes into this and it feels like about half of that. The fans are WAY behind Bret here still too which is a good sign.

Back to the arm but Backlund misses a charge and goes shoulder first into the post. Bret blocks another piledriver attempt but hooks a sleeper, which is broken pretty fast because it’s not really a submission move. They hit head to head and both guys go down. For a guy who was about 45 at this point, Backlund has looked great. Now Bret piledrives Bob and hits a bulldog to take over.

The Five Moves Of Doom culminate with the Sharpshooter but Owen runs in to deck his brother and break up the hold. Now we get to the turning point of the match as Davey charges at Owen but misses and rams his own head into the steps. He’s out cold and there’s no one to throw in Bret’s towel. Owen panics and the distraction lets Backlund put on the full Chicken Wing even though Bret had his hand on the rope at the beginning of the hold and a rope break was used earlier in the match but I digress.

Backlund has the hold on in the middle of the ring as Owen begins to get concerned about Bret. He says he’s sorry and Backlund takes Bret down to the mat with the hold. Smith still hasn’t moved and Bret is trying to fight up. Bret gets to his feet but can’t get the rope as Backlund pulls him down and puts on the bodyscissors along with the hold. Owen starts crying which Vince declares the TRUE Owen.

Vince says you can lose if you say you quit, which goes against what we saw earlier with Backlund but it’s the WWF so you can’t count on continuity. We go split screen to look at Bret’s parents as Bret has been in this hold for over four minutes. Owen goes over to plead to his mom (not Stu because Stu is smarter than this) as Bret is in agony. Bret taps but that doesn’t mean anything yet. The hold has now been on for six straight minutes and the fans are still behind Bret. The maniacal look on Bob’s face is great.

Owen begs his mom for help again and opens the barricade to bring his parents to ringside. Stu still doesn’t seem to buy anything Owen is saying. Owen picks up Bret’s towel and says for Helen to throw it in but Stu says no way. Owen gets the fans to cheer for Helen to throw in the towel and after nine and a half minutes in the hold, Helen takes the towel from Stu and throws it in, giving Backlund the title and STUNNING the fans. Owen throws his arms in the air and celebrates, sprinting to the back in triumph, because it was a SWERVE.

Rating: A. This match definitely isn’t for everyone, but if you’re a fan of old school matches and psychology, you’re going to love this match. The whole thing is a massive story with the execution being done perfectly (or with excellence if you like plays on catchphrases). Bret and Backlund are both master technicians so the in ring stuff is as close to flawless as you’re going to get. The stuff with Owen is great too and the whole match is almost perfect. It runs about thirty five minutes though and if you’re not a fan of mat stuff and building to a big finish, you’re going to hate this.

One other thing: I’d like to point out that Davey Boy Smith has been out cold for almost eleven minutes now, hasn’t moved an inch, and is likely clinically dead yet hasn’t received any attention at all. Owen stepped over him about four times in the whole sequence.

Backlund’s face as he’s awarded the title is amazing as he looks somewhat retarded which pointing at himself. This is one of those moments where you look at the card on paper and say “well of course Bret retains. There’s no way they would make Backlund champion.” And then they DID and it was a legit shock. Backlund looks maniacal and the image of a plain guy in blue trunks being champion is kind of awesome as he’s all dangerous while looking nuts.

Owen celebrates in the back and cuts a great evil promo talking about how he’s the real king now and Bret is a nobody. This was the culmination of an incredible feud that ran for like a year.

Million Dollar Team vs. Guts And Glory

Tatanka, King King Bundy, Bam Bam Bigelow, Heavenly Bodies

Lex Luger, Adam Bomb, Mabel, Smoking Gunns

This is DiBiase’s team (DiBiase had hurt his neck and had to retire) vs. Luger in a continuation of a long feud. DiBiase had said that Luger had sold out and Tatanka, Luger’s friend, believed DiBiase. This led to a match at Summerslam where it turned out that TATANKA had been bought off in a swerve I liked a lot. This is Luger’s chance for revenge again.

Luger and Tatanka start things off, much to Tatanka’s surprise. Tatanka takes over to start and chops away but the ones to the chest don’t work on Luger. Does no one watch the NWA around here? Lex no sells a suplex and pounds away with all his usual stuff. A clothesline puts Tatanka on the floor so here’s Del Ray to be beaten up too. Mabel and Bundy come in but it’s just a staredown as it’s back to the starters. Now it’s officially Mabel vs. Prichard (the Bodies are Tom Prichard and Jimmy Del Ray) with the big man missing an elbow. Prichard pounds away but a middle rope cross body (Mabel weighs 500lbs) kills him dead.

It’s 5-4 now and Del Ray comes in for some dropkicks which have no effect. A Boss Man Slam takes Jimmy down so it’s off to Bundy vs. Mabel. They collide a few times until Mabel runs him over. Off to Bigelow who gets beaten down and Mabel goes up, only to get slammed down in a cool visual. Bigelow goes up for a sunset flip but Mabel sits on his chest for no cover. A Cactus Clothesline sends them both to the floor and Mabel can’t beat the count back in to tie things up.

Off to Billy Gunn vs. Del Ray which goes nowhere so here’s Bomb vs. Bigelow. This takes about 30 seconds with Bomb hitting a slingshot clothesline but getting hit in the head by Bundy. A moonsault takes Bomb out and it’s 4-3. Luger comes in immediately and tries a rollup but it just gets two. Off to Del Ray who hits a fast superkick to take Lex down. After some right hands from Jimmy, a running forearm smash catches him in the head and Luger ties it up.

It’s Tatanka/Bigelow/Bundy vs. Luger/Smoking Gunns. It’s Bart vs. Tatanka before Billy comes in for a double Russian legsweep for two. The Gunns pound away on Tatanka for a little while with Bart and his mullet of death hitting a monkey flip for two. The Sidewinder (side slam from Bart with a legdrop from Billy) gets two and it’s back to Bart, who like an IDIOT, tries a crucifix on a guy whose finisher is a Samoan Drop. Later Bart and it’s 3-2.

Billy vs. Tatanka goes nowhere so it’s back to Luger. Billy comes in and hip tosses Tatanka for two and an elbow drop gets the same. Luger and Gunn take turns on Tatanka’s arm until Billy gets caught in a powerslam. Off to Bundy who hits a splash and elbow to get us down to Luger vs. Bigelow, Bundy and Tatanka. It’s Luger vs. King Kong now but Lex goes after Tatanka because he’s A FREAKING MORON.

Luger gets caught in the evil corner and we play the numbers game for awhile. Luger hits a forearm to Tatanka but only gets two. A sunset flip almost gets a pin on Tatanka but a tag was made on the way down to bring in Bigelow. Bundy drops an elbow for two and Lex is in trouble. Bigelow drops a headbutt for a VERY fast two. DiBiase talks trash as it’s off to Bundy for more fat man offense.

Bundy drops an elbow for two as we’re reenacting the main event of the first Survivor Series, complete with two of the original people in it. Back to Tatanka who gets two off a powerslam and drops a bunch of elbows. In a stupid looking yet still good ending, Luger gets a fast small package for the pin on Tatanka, then lays down on the mat so Bundy can splash him for the final elimination. That looked stupid.

Rating: C. This wasn’t that bad actually and the ending was a nice surprise. There was no reason to have Luger come back here and having him lose was the right move. The feud didn’t really go anywhere after this and was more or less the ending of it. Luger’s collapse after Summerslam 1993 is a sight to see given how hot he was during the summer after his face turn.

A group beatdown on Lex follows the match. The Gunns and Bomb make the save.

Backlund has a press conference and says he’s going to homogenize and synchronize the fans. It’s time for Sports Education and he’s been champion for sixteen years now. I love this character, which is a shame because he would lose the title to Diesel less than a week later in eight seconds.

Here’s Chuck Norris to be guest referee for the main event.

Quick recap before we get to casket match. This is a rematch of a casket match at the Royal Rumble (don’t get me started on that mess) where about ten guys came out to help Yokozuna beat Undertaker. Norris is here to stop interference.

Yokozuna vs. Undertaker

This is a casket match where you have to throw your opponent in the casket and close it to win. Druids bring out the casket of course. Yoko is so fat here it’s unreal. Taker does the throat slit from across the ring and Yoko falls down. A Yoko splash in the corner is no sold but the fat man stops before he gets thrown to the casket. Yoko winds up on top of the casket to further freak him out.

They fight to the floor with Taker in control. Back inside Old School staggers Yoko but he catches Taker in a Samoan Drop. Taker doesn’t sell it but the move did hit. A headbutt puts Taker down but he won’t go in the casket. Back in and Taker misses an elbow but sits up anyway. A Rock Bottom puts Taker down and Yoko drops a leg while he’s sitting up to keep the dead man (as in Undertaker, not the legitimately dead Yokozuna) down.

Taker gets put in the casket but he blocks it from being closed. They both wind up in the box and slug it out but Mr. Fuji pulls Taker’s hair to break things up. Cornette (Yoko’s other manager) gets drilled as well and we head back inside. Yoko sends him back to the floor and rams him into the steps (from inside the ring, which is kind of impressive). Back inside and they slug it out with Taker slamming Yoko’s head into the mat.

Taker channels his inner Kane and hits a top rope clothesline to put Yokozuna down. As he’s rolling the fat man over, here’s King Kong Bundy to glare at Norris. Bigelow comes out as well but nothing comes of it. Nothing comes of it on their end at least as IRS comes in and beats up Undertaker, which would also set up the Undertaker vs. DiBiase’s Corporation feud for 1995. Taker gets put in the casket but by the time Yoko gets there, Taker blocks the lid from closing. Jeff Jarrett comes out to challenge Norris and gets kicked in the chest. Taker hits a DDT and a big boot to send Yokozuna into the casket for the win.

Rating: D. This was really dull stuff and the ending was never in doubt. Once Yokozuna got this fat he was just worthless. This was the last we would see of him until Wrestlemania where he came back EVEN BIGGER. Norris didn’t really add much here but the fans liked him and that’s all that really matters. Thankfully this feud ended here.

Overall Rating: C-. This isn’t a terrible show but there are some bad parts to it. The interesting thing is that in a lot of parts, this is a sequel of last year’s show. Last year we heard rumblings of Shawn being the REAL Intercontinental Champion and he was facing Razor here, Taker vs. Yoko is a direct continuation, and Bret vs. Owen started at the 93 show and it’s almost over here (they would interact at the Rumble and have one big blowoff match after that). Anyway, this isn’t bad but a lot of people would be bored by the title match, which is understandable. Not a great show but it’s watchable, except for the clowns.

Ratings Comparison

Teamsters vs. Bad Guys

Original: C-

Redo: C

Royal Family vs. Clowns R Us

Original: G (as in below an F)

Redo: S

Bob Backlund vs. Bret Hart

Original: A

Redo: A

Million Dollar Team vs. Guts and Glory

Original: C-

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Yokozuna

Original: D+

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: C-

That’s probably as close as any of these second looks are going to go.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/13/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-mr-bob-backlund-and-chuck-norris/




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1992 (2023 Edition): It’s Not That Good

Survivor Series 1992
Date: November 25, 1992
Location: Richfield Coliseum, Richfield, Ohio
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

This was one of the Redo’s picked for Survivor Series and in a way, that is rather odd. In this case, there is very little Survivor Seriesing going on, with just one elimination match, which happens to be a tag team edition. Other than that, we have a huge tag match as Randy Savage and Mr. Perfect face Razor Ramon and Ric Flair, plus Bret Hart defending the WWE Title against Shawn Michaels. Let’s get to it.

Vince and Bobby run down the card. Bobby is NOT happy about Mr. Perfect joining forces with Randy Savage.

High Energy vs. Headshrinkers

Afa is here with the Headshrinkers. Samu shoves Hart down without much trouble to start but misses a crossbody. Hart’s crossbody and dropkick work far better and it’s off to Ware to work on the arm. For some reason Ware tries ramming their heads together, which works as well as you would expect. Afa gets in a cheap shot from the floor and Fatu runs Ware over with a hard clotheslines as the fans are not pleased.

The nerve hold (you knew that one was coming) goes on and another clothesline drops Ware again. Ware tries to fight up and is casually superkicked right back down (Fatu always had a good superkick). Back up and Ware avoids a charge, with Samu going head first into the post. That’s enough for the tag off to Hart to pick the pace way up. A high crossbody gets two on Fatu but Samu plants him with a powerslam. Fatu’s Superfly Splash finishes Hart at 7:40.

Rating: C+. I’ve always been a Headshrinkers fan and this was a good example of why. They did some things rather well (Fatu’s superkick and splash looked awesome) but they are a team where what you see is what you get. While High Energy was out there flying around and doing what they could, the Headshrinkers were out there to hit you hard and do their second generation Wild Samoan stuff. It worked back in the day and it worked again here in a nice opener.

Nailz, with that still weird deep voice, has been looking forward to hurting the Big Boss Man for a long time. Tonight, he gets the chance, with Boss Man unable to handcuff him to a steel bunk bed. Boss Man and his feel guards know what kind of a good climber he is! He committed no crime but tonight he’s ready to do horrible things to Boss Man with that nightstick. How Sean Mooney doesn’t crack up at all of this is unclear.

Big Boss Man doesn’t buy Nailz saying he’s an innocent man because he’s seen the file. His job is to make sure Nails serves hard time…and then he literally runs off to the ring.

Big Boss Man vs. Nailz

Nightstick on a pole match with Boss Man charging to the ring as Nailz is already climbing. Boss Man slugs away but gets whipped hard into the corner. Nailz hammers away but it’s too early for him to get the stick. Back up and Boss Man goes simple by punching him in the face, only to get slammed off when going for the stick. The chinlock goes on (Heenan: “RIP IT OFF!”) but Boss Man fights out, only to miss a splash.

Boss Man knocks him down again and they both get a breather. They get up for a double clothesline and they’re both down again. That’s enough for Boss Man to get the stick and deck Nailz in the face but he shrugs it off. A right hand makes Boss Man drop the stick and Nailz gets in a few shots of his own. Not that it matters as the Boss Man Slam is enough to pin Nailz at 5:40.

Rating: D+. The nightstick doesn’t make much of a difference if it doesn’t make an impact and that was the case here. They traded nightstick shots and barely hurt each other so there wasn’t much of a point. Other than that, it was a slow brawl without anything important. Lame stuff here as Boss Man was rapidly running out of steam.

Ric Flair and Razor Ramon aren’t happy with Mr. Perfect turning on them to join Mr. Savage as Ultimate Warrior’s replacement. We see a clip of Savage picking Perfect and Bobby Heenan running his mouth to make Perfect switch sides. Heenan begging for mercy and for Perfect to reconsider is such a Heenan thing for him to do. Flair and Ramon swear vengeance on the now crazy Perfect.

Heenan goes on a great rant against Perfect as only he could.

Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

This is during Martel’s kind of sailing captain phase and he has some of Tatanka’s feathers to make this personal. Tatanka gets driven into the corner to start but he reverses and chops away. Some dropkicks have Martel on the floor, followed by an atomic drop to put him outside again. Back in and Martel grabs a hot shot (Heenan approves) to take over.

The front facelock goes on as we hear about Sgt. Slaughter being Jack Tunney’s official rule enforcer. Tatanka suplexes his way out of a front facelock but Martel puts it right back on. Cue Doink The Clown as Martel knocks Tatanka back down and grabs the same front facelock. Tatanka fights up and hits a clothesline before avoiding a charge to send Martel shoulder first into the post.

The arm cranking goes on as the fans are just silent here. An armdrag into an armbar cuts off the energy again as this just keeps going. Martel fights up and sends him to the floor, only to get punched out of the air back inside. Tatanka starts the comeback and hits the top rope chop to the head. The Papoose To Go finally finishes Martel at 11:07.

Rating: D+. This is a good example of a match that wasn’t awful, but instead really boring. Tatanka and Martel could probably have a good match that runs about seven minutes but there is nothing you can get out of that many front facelocks and then Tatanka working the arm late in the match. Not a terrible match, but it took me a long time to get through it as it was just that dull.

Mr. Perfect and Randy Savage know that Ric Flair hates them being a team. Perfect is ready to take out Flair and Razor Ramon, because Bobby Heenan knows Perfect can beat both of them. Savage says if the villains were mad before, they’re going to be even madder in a little while.

Ric Flair/Razor Ramon vs. Mr. Perfect/Randy Savage

Heenan is of course incredible here with his rants about what is coming to Perfect. Ramon and Perfect get things going with Ramon hitting a running shoulder. That doesn’t work for Perfect, who is back with a slap but Perfect bails from the threat of a double team. Flair comes in and is quickly taken down by Perfect, who chops away in the corner. There’s the Flair Flip to the apron, where Savage knocks him to the floor for a bonus.

It’s off to Savage for a top rope ax handle to the ribs, leaving a Flair fan (in robe) losing it in the crowd. Savage slugs away on Flair and the interfering Ramon, setting up that signature running clothesline on Flair. A cheap shot slows Savage down though and it’s Ramon coming in to slug away. Ramon can’t get anywhere with Savage’s leg so he goes with the choking instead.

Flair slugs away in the corner and it’s right back to Ramon for the abdominal stretch. With that broken up, Flair tosses Savage over the top for a crash, setting up the running knee. Ramon grabs a kind of weak half crab….and Perfect is walking up the aisle. He sees Savage bleeding on the screen though and that’s enough to draw him back, much to Heenan’s annoyance.

With order restored, Flair gets two off a chop but Savage manages a desperation backslide for the same. Ramon comes right back in and grabs a chokeslam for two more on Savage. There’s a clothesline to put him down again but for some reason Flair goes up, earning a slam off the bottom rope for an extra big crash. The double tag (diving on Savage’s end) brings in Perfect to face Ramon as everything breaks down.

Flair chairs Savage in the head with a chair on the floor and Perfect is whipped into the referee. Another referee comes out as Perfect flips out of a Razor’s Edge and grabs the PerfectPlex. The new referee counts two as Flair makes the save so it’s PerfectPlex to him as well. The first referee counts two with Ramon making a save, meaning the villains are finally DQ’d at 16:30.

Rating: B-. It was one of the featured matches on the show but it was only so interesting. The biggest problem here is that the heat on Savage was rather long and then the ending felt like it was designed to set something else down the line. Flair and Perfect would keep going but Savage and Ramon were pretty much done, making this a preview for something that didn’t happen.

Post match the beatdown is on until Savage makes the save with a chair. Perfect gets the chair and clean house (Heenan: “SOMEBODY GET DOWN THERE AND STOP HIM!”). The announcement of the DQ gives us a classic THAT’S NOT FAIR TO FLAIR! Respect is shown.

Flair and Ramon swear vengeance.

Yokozuna vs. Virgil

Yokozuna does his sumo stomps in the corner and knocks Virgil down without much trouble. Some dropkicks work for Virgil but he tries an O’Connor roll to limited avail. A superkick cuts Virgil down and Yokozuna slowly pounds away. Virgil’s comeback attempt is cut off by a side slam and the big legdrop makes it worse. The splash in the corner sets up the Banzai Drop to finish Virgil at 3:44.

Rating: C. Pretty much a total squash here and that’s all it needed to be. This version of Yokozuna was rather mobile and someone who felt like different kind of monster. It makes sense to put him out here to wreck a loser like Virgil and he looked rather dominant. Good stuff here, and the push is clearly coming.

Mr. Perfect has turkeys for Ric Flair and Razor Ramon. Bobby Heenan gets a little chicken.

Natural Disasters/Nasty Boys vs. Money Inc./Beverly Brothers

The villains have the Genius/Jimmy Hart in their corner and if one person is eliminated, their partner is as well. Typhoon backs Blake into the corner and then shoves him into the corner without much effort. An over the shoulder backbreaker has Blake in more trouble and Earthquake comes in for a bearhug. A powerslam puts Blake down again and Knobbs runs him over to make it worse.

It’s off to Sags, who finally gets caught in the wrong corner so Beau can come in for a change. Sags hits a pumphandle slam (Vince: “What a wrestling maneuver!”) but Beau grabs a butterfly suplex. DiBiase comes in for a change but gets suplexed down in a hurry. IRS comes in and elbows Sags down so Beau can drop an elbow for two. The chinlock goes on but Sags fights up for a double knockdown. The tag brings Earthquake back in to wreck everything, setting up the Earthquake to Beau for the elimination at 9:26.

Earthquake runs DiBiase over and it’s Typhoon coming in for a headbutt. A missed charge actually lets Money Inc. manage a double belly to back suplex, followed by a wishbone snap. The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by DiBiase’s middle rope ax handle. DiBiase’s middle rope dive into a raised boot lands on a raised boot and it’s back to Typhoon to clean house. The big splash hits IRS but DiBiase makes the save, allowing IRS to drop an elbow for the pin at 15:55. Then Sags rolls IRS up for the pin at 16:03.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t exactly good but rather long with almost nothing worth seeing. There was a story o Hart losing Money Inc. and the Disasters as teams while the Nasty Boys wanted the Tag Team Titles but that wasn’t exactly thrilling here. This felt like lip service to having the Survivor Series concept and if that’s the best they’ve got, they might as well have just skipped it this year (which they seemed to want to do).

Randy Savage, Mr. Perfect and Tatanka are on the Superstar Line.

Heenan rants about Perfect again.

We recap Kamala beating up Undertaker at Summerslam, only to have Undertaker do the situp and scare him away. Undertaker wanted revenge and Kamala was terrified of a casket, so he built a really big casket. It was a simpler time.

Undertaker vs. Kamala

Coffin match (win by pin/submission, loser goes into the casket) with Paul Bearer, Kim Chee and Harvey Wippleman here as well. Undertaker chases him to the floor to start but Kamala chops away back inside. That’s fine with Undertaker, who strikes right back and hits Old School. Well not that old at this point.

Some shots to the face stagger Undertaker though and Kamala sends him outside for a ram into the steps. A chair to the back staggers Undertaker again but some chops don’t do much back inside. Three slams in a row set up a series of splashes but lets bring the Urn in. Kamala freaks out so Undertaker gets up and hits him in the head with it for the win at 5:28.

Rating: C-. Another not so great match as Kamala just wasn’t that interesting in the ring. It also doesn’t help that there was almost no way to imagine Kamala beating Undertaker, who was a major star and far out of Kamala’s league. The match was a way to wrap things up for Undertaker, who needed a new monster to slay. Much like the previous match, this was a way to get something (or someone) on the show and that didn’t make it interesting.

Post match Kamala nails the coffin shut and wheels it out.

Intercontinental Champion Shawn Michaels says he beat the British Bulldog for the title and since the Bulldog beat Bret Hart for the title, Michaels can beat Bret tonight.

Bret Hart says he’s ready to beat Shawn and add him to a list of recently defeated challengers (Berzerker! Rick Martel! VIRGIL!). We hear about how Bret rose through the ranks to get here and he isn’t ready to lose just yet, even to a great wrestler like Shawn.

WWF Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart

Only Bret is defending. After the handing off of the sunglasses to a kid, Bret takes Shawn into the corner. They go to the mat with Bret easily taking control and sending Shawn bailing to the rope. Back up and Bret takes over on the arm, including some armbarring. We’ll make that some hammerlocking with some knees to the arm but Shawn is back up with a hammerlock of his own.

That’s reversed with a toss out to the floor, followed by another armbar back inside. Shawn slugs his way out of trouble, only to get clotheslined down for two. The armbar goes on again but Shawn drops him across the top to get a breather. Shawn sends him shoulder first into the post and hits a DDT onto the arm. We hit the chinlock for a good while, setting up a backbreaker into another chinlock.

Bret fights up and gets a neckbreaker but Shawn takes him right back down. Now it’s a front facelock to keep Bret down, though this time he’s back up with some shoulders in the corner. The bulldog out of the corner sets up the missed middle rope elbow and we’re back to the front facelock. Bret is up again and manages a belly to back suplex before sending him head first into the post.

There’s the backdrop (you know Bret can call that one) into the Russian legsweep for two, followed by the middle rope elbow for the same. A high impact superplex gives Bret a rather delayed near fall and they’re getting tired. The referee gets crushed in the corner…but is right back up. Shawn sends Bret outside and manages a posting, followed by his own backdrop for his own two back inside.

The superkick (not yet the finisher, or even named) doesn’t even warrant a cover so the teardrop suplex (almost an Angle Slam) gives Shawn two. Bret gets in a shot though and gets Shawn tied up in the ropes, only to miss a charge and crash hard. Shawn goes up but dives right into the Sharpshooter to retain Bret’s title at 26:39.

Rating: B. I’ve seen this match a few times now and while it is good, it really needed to be about eight minutes shorter. There is a lot of time spent just sitting there in either the armbar or the chinlock, which can get rather tedious. It got better near the end and Bret is a beatable enough champion to make this work, but it went longer than it needed to and that brought things down a bit.

And then Santa Claus comes out to celebrate with Bret to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The two big matches are good enough and they get more time than almost anything else on the show, but the biggest problem here is nothing really feels major. Bret vs. Shawn feels more like a really enhanced midcard match while the big tag match is….I’m not sure what it is but it didn’t feel important enough to be the featured match. It’s clear that the WWF is in a transitional period here and it’s really not clicking yet. Not an awful show, but nothing you need to see save for maybe some historical curiosity.

 

Ratings Comparison

Headshrinkers vs. High Energy

Original: C+

2012 Redo: C+

2023 Redo: C+

Big Boss Man vs. Nailz

Original: D+

2012 Redo: D

2023 Redo: D+

Tatanka vs. Rick Martel

Original: C-

2012 Redo: D

2023 Redo: D+

Randy Savage/Mr. Perfect vs. Razor Ramon/Ric Flair

Original: B

2012 Redo: B-

2023 Redo: B-

Yokozuna vs. Virgil

Original: C
2012 Redo: C-

2023 Redo: C

Nasty Boys/Natural Disasters vs. Money Inc./Beverly Brothers

Original: D

2012 Redo: C

2023 Redo: C-

Undertaker vs. Kamala

Original: C+

2012 Redo: F

2023 Redo: C-


Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels:

Original: A-

2012 Redo: A

2023 Redo: B

Overall Rating:

Original: C+

2012 Redo: B-

2023 Redo: C

Yeah Bret vs. Shawn just isn’t that great.




Survivor Series Count-Up – 1991 (2012 Redo): It Still Annoys Me

Survivor Series 1991
Date: November 27, 1991
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 17,500
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

Things are a bit different here but the real change will come next year. The main thing here is that we have a world title match in the first singles match in the history of this show. Undertaker has gone from squashing jobbers to the stars to squashing people out of the company to terrorizing Savage and Liz at their wedding to being #1 contender. Hogan hasn’t done anything since Wrestlemania so a change of opponents will do him a world of good. Oh and Ric Flair is here. Let’s get to it.

We open with a clip from Superstars with Savage being tied up in the ropes as Jake Roberts made the cobra bite Savage’s arm. Piper immediately ran down from the broadcast booth to try to help. Liz came out screaming as well. This is when Savage was a commentator and retired but looking for reinstatement.

The key thing is he had been scheduled to be on the PPV as a captain against Jake’s team, but because of this, both captains were pulled off the show with three days’ notice, basically baiting and switching the fans. The actual match between the two of them would be a week later on a different PPV called Tuesday in Texas, which was another $20.

Anyway back on Superstars, Savage can’t stand up because of the snake bite but he keeps trying to fight Jake. They finally get Savage on a stretcher and start wheeling him away but he falls off. Now we get to the unintentional comedy part of this. Savage falls off and remember that Vince is on commentary here, so he’s FREAKING over all this stuff. The camera cuts to a crying child in the crowd and Vince loses it, audibly cracking up on air and trying to talk about “complete chaos” while clearly laughing.

We get the announcement from Jack Tunney that Savage and Roberts won’t be allowed to wrestle at Survivor Series. This is translated as “HAHA WE GOT YOUR MONEY ALREADY!”

Gorilla and Bobby talk for a bit.

Team Ric Flair vs. Team Roddy Piper

Ric Flair, Ted DiBiase, The Mountie, The Warlord

Roddy Piper, Bret Hart, Davey Boy Smith, Virgil

Roddy was Flair’s first feud in the company as not only did you know the matches would be good, but the promos would be awesome too. Bret was feuding with Mountie over the IC Title, Smith was feuding with Warlord over who was stronger and Virgil was feuding with DiBiase because who else was he going to feud with?

Flair has the REAL World Title with him here, which is mosaiced but if you know your titles, you can see a WWF Tag Team Title, which looks really weird if you’re in the arena (if you’re not familiar with what I’m talking about, the short version is Flair was NWA Champion, left the NWA, wasn’t paid back for the deposit he put down on the belt, brought it to the WWF, got sued, and couldn’t use the title in the angle they were doing anymore so they would substitute in another belt which was censored in storyline.)

Big reaction for Bret, who has finally split from Neidhart and is IC Champion as of Summerslam. DiBiase starts for his team against Piper which is a pretty awesome match. No managers are allowed at ringside this year but Sherri is there anyway. Flair sneaks in and blasts Piper in the back to give Ted an early advantage. Piper atomic drops Ted and Sherri comes in to choke him which somehow isn’t a DQ. Piper kisses her and punches DiBiase to take over.

Sherri is sent to the back and Roddy brings in Smith. The good guys work over the arm of DiBiase with Virgil of all people getting the biggest pop. After all four go in they start going around again with all four getting in another set of shots on the arm. Bret stays in but misses a knee in the corner to put himself in trouble. They trade near falls before Bret takes him right back down by the arm.

DiBiase hiptosses him down and wisely tags in Flair. Bret starts with some of his favorite moves before tagging in Davey Boy to slingshot Flair into the corner. Piper wants in but Flair stops the tag. There’s the gorilla press to Flair and the tag to Piper, drawing a BIG pop from the crowd. Piper goes nuts with punches, knocking Flair to the floor where we get a Flair Flop.

Back inside and it’s off to Warlord who Piper wants to try a test of strength against. Piper is just playing though and brings in Smith for the big power match. Smith hits some shoulder blocks but misses a charge and it’s off to Mountie. Bret tags in and Mountie immediately hits the floor. Instead here’s DiBiase who gets elbowed off the middle rope for two. Ted and Bret hit head to head and both guys are down.

Mountie is willing to get in there now but it’s back to Davey instead. Smith gorilla presses Mountie and pumps him about three times before slamming him down for no cover. Off to Flair who chops away at the Bulldog which doesn’t work at all. DiBiase and Flair try a double team but get double clotheslined instead. There’s the powerslam to Mountie but he’s not legal. Flair comes off the top with a shot to the back of Smith’s head for the pin and the elimination. Both guys were legal too.

Piper immediately charges in but Flair tags DiBiase back instead. Flair comes in to face a downed Piper but Ric is put in the Figure Four almost immediately. Off to Mountie vs. Virgil and Mountie can’t get a tag out from anyone, because everyone is afraid of Virgil. I can’t say I blame them. He might tell them about how great he is. Flair comes in and has zero luck so it’s DiBiase vs. Virgil again. Ted powerslams him down and it’s immediately back to the Warlord.

Virgil gets sent to the floor and Flair sends him into the steps, with Virgil doing an awful job of pretending to slam into them. The full nelson goes on but everything breaks down and Bret comes off the top to take out Warlord, giving the illegal Piper the pin to tie us up at 3. Piper vs. DiBiase now before Virgil is quickly tagged in. Virgil slaps the Million Dollar Dream on DiBiase but Ted sends him into the buckle to escape.

Here’s Flair again with a belly to back supelx before it’s back to Mountie. Every remaining heel takes their shots on Virgil which is likely the best possibly option. I mean, do you want VIRGIL getting the hot tag? Flair covers him for two and puts his feet on the ropes because that’s what Flair does. DiBiase comes in and ducks his head, only to get caught by a swinging neckbreaker. There’s the hot tag to Piper who no sells everything Flair throws at him. Everything breaks down and Flair is sent to the floor. That’s important because the referee disqualifies EVERYONE in the ring, but Flair was outside and is the sole survivor.

Rating: B. Gah this was going AWESOME until the pretty lame ending. Having Flair be the sole survivor is a smart move though as it makes the fans hate him even more. This was a GREAT setup though and was on pace to be a classic before the ending. To be fair though, at the pace they were going the match would have been an hour long if they were going to do a full version. Still though, what we got was very good.

Gene is on the platform and brings out Savage to talk about Jake, because we can’t have the match on this show so let’s talk about it instead. Savage talks about being bitten by the snake and being able to see and hear Liz crying, which is the worst thing Jake could do. He promises to be all over Jake like melted butter. Oh man stuff just got REAL. Liz comes out which is a big deal apparently. As usual, she has nothing to say.

Gorilla thinks Tuesday in Texas may be on TV! Give me a break.

Team Mustafa vs. Team Slaughter

Colonel Mustafa, Berzerker, Skinner, Hercules

Sgt. Slaughter, Tito Santana, Jim Duggan, Texas Tornado

A lot of these guys are on their way out. Hercules would be in WCW by May, Tornado would job to the stars until leaving in July as would Mustafa (Iron Sheik), and the rest of the guys would do nothing of note for the rest of their time in the company. Kerry (Tornado) looks high as a kite and almost falls off the apron getting into the ring. This is pretty recently after Slaughter’s face turn as he was a heel at Summerslam. This isn’t exactly the most talent laden match ever and the only feud is Slaughter vs. Mustafa.

Tito and Skinner start with Santana taking over with a headlock. There’s the flying forearm out of nowhere and Skinner hits the floor without a cover. Off to Berzerker vs. Tornado which would work a lot better down in Dallas. Berzerker (a crazy viking who tried to stab Undertaker with a sword) misses a dropkick and it’s off to Mustafa. After some very brief offense, Kerry tumbles to his corner and brings in Duggan to face Hercules, which was in the first ever match at Survivor Series.

Duggan gets taken down by double and triple teaming and it’s off to Mustafa. He loads up his curled boots (it’s a Sheik thing) and does nothing with them. Thanks for wasting our time with that. Duggan pounds away and backdrops Mustafa down before the hot tag to Slaughter. The big showdown is an atomic drop and a clothesline to Mustafa for the elimination.

Berzerker comes in with some clotheslines and a kick to the fat gut of Slaughter. A boot to Slaughter’s face puts him down and it’s off to Hercules for some two counts. Back to the viking who gets crotched on the top rope and kicked in the legs. Off to Duggan who clotheslines Berzerker to the floor and backdrops him back there a few seconds later. Tornado comes in and pounds away on him before it’s off to Hercules again. Tito gets a blind tag and hits a forearm to the back of the head (El Paso Del Muerte) for the pin and the elimination.

Skinner, the guy that owned now former developmental program FCW, comes in as it’s 4-2. When you have Skinner and Berzerker as your only guys left, the team is in big trouble. A blind tag brings in Slaughter who rolls up Skinner for the elimination. Slaughter whips Berzerker into Duggan’s clothesline for the elimination and the win.

Rating: F. The match sucked, it was never in doubt, and the biggest deal on the heel team was Skinner, who would get an IC Title shot soon after this. What a horrible match and one of the most worthless ones in the history of the show so far, which is covering quite a bit of ground. Nothing to see here at all.

Here’s Jake to plug Tuesday in Texas some more. To be fair, Trust Me Jake was AWESOME. Jake swears he didn’t know that the snake had venom in it still but making Liz cry excited him. God has told Jake that God doesn’t like Okerlund, so let’s blame everyone but Jake. I said he was awesome, not that he made sense. No reptiles are allowed at the match between Savage and Roberts. He wants to kiss Liz and that’s about it.

We recap Hogan vs. Taker. Flair confronted Hogan in Taker’s Funeral Parlor and went off on him about hearing about Hogan for years. Now Flair is here and wants to know what Hogan is going to do about it. Hogan pulled off the shirt and Taker came out of a standing casket behind Hulk and hit him with the urn. Piper and Savage ran out of the broadcast booth with chairs but Taker literally swatted away Savage’s swing. Taker rips Hogan’s cross off ala Andre in 87 and leaves.

WWF World Title: Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Taker is “undefeated” here, which means overseas tours and house shows don’t count because Tito beat him in Spain and Warrior beat him on a bunch of house shows. Feeling out process to start with no one being able to get a real advantage. Taker shoulders Hogan and Hulk regroups a bit while Taker reaches to the urn. Back in and Taker chokes away in the corner in a shot you see in a lot of Taker video packages.

Bearer chokes Hogan a bit and Taker slams him. A big elbow misses and the place pops loudly. Hulk pounds away but he can’t put Taker down. A slam doesn’t work nor does an elbow to the head. Hogan clotheslines Taker to the floor where the dead man lands on his feet and pulls Hogan outside. Back in and Taker chokes away some more as does Bearer. Taker starts smothering him as you can see the Hogan super fan, a guy who dressed up like Hulk (including yellow trunks) sitting in the front row and freaking out.

This hold goes on for a good while, which is just Taker having his hand on Hogan’s face and doing nothing else. By long I mean like two and a half minuets. When the whole match is only thirteen minutes, that’s a long stretch. Hogan comes back with some shoulder blocks that don’t do much, only to have Taker clothesline him down again. There’s the Tombstone but Hogan is up before a cover. He pounds away on Taker and knocks him down to one knee which is a new thing for Taker.

Hogan gets a good slam as Flair is on his way to the ring. I miss that black and white robe. That thing was spiffy. Hogan takes out Flair with a right hand and big boots Taker, only to have Bearer grab his leg. Taker loads up the Tombstone as Flair slides in a chair. The piledriver on the chair gives us a new world champion and a decisive face pop for the dead man. Taker holding the title like it’s a coupon for a free coffee at a Shell station is a nice touch.

Rating: D. Yeah this match completely sucked but we have a new champion and a reason to watch Flair vs. Hogan, which never happened for various reason. Hogan would beat Taker for the title at Tuesday in Texas six days later, but the title would be held up and decided in the Rumble, where Flair would win it and set up Wrestlemania. Bad match, but a BIG moment.

People come out to check on Hogan as Gorilla rips into Flair. Hogan takes awhile to leave, likely to let the fans get over some of their shock.

Roddy is in the back and goes on a big rant against Tunney and Flair and Taker.

Flair and Perfect say they told us this would happen and now they’ve been proven right. Flair is the REAL World Champion now. Tunney needs to stop distorting the belt.

Intermission, which means we see a graphic for fifteen minutes.

Gene recaps what’s happened so far in case someone ordered the PPV halfway through for some reason.

The Natural Disasters and IRS are ready for the LOD and Boss Man. That’s the main event people. They’re not even hiding the screwing over of the fans anymore.

LOD and the Boss Man are ready too. Seriously there’s nothing else to say here. They say exactly what you would expect them to say and nothing else. Hawk gets ready to do the WHAT A RUSH line but as he loads it up, Sean interrupts him to say Gene is with Jack Tunney. Hawk gives him a look that would stop a tank and says his catchphrase, then lets Sean throw it to Gene.

Tunney announces Hogan vs. Taker II at Tuesday in Texas. He’ll be at ringside as well, which makes the boredom levels shoot through the roof, if that’s even possible.

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Nasty Boys, Beverly Brothers

Rockers, Bushwhackers

This is right before the Rockers split and they’re already having issues. This is regular rules, which means individual eliminations and not one loss means both team members are gone. Butch and Knobbs get things going as Gorilla and Bobby talk about Hogan vs. Taker II. Butch hits a running knee lift and it’s off to Luke. The Whackers take over on the Nasties with a pair of double clotheslines.

The Beverly Brothers come in and do about as well as the Nasties with both Brothers taking a Battering Ram. The Rockers double dropkick the Nasties and the good guys have cleared the ring. It’s Shawn vs. Beau (the other is Blake) now as the announcers debate which guy on either team is the brains. A backbreaker puts Shawn down and it’s back to Knobbs. Luke comes in and avoids a splash in the corner but whacks his arms too much, allowing Knobbs to hit a middle rope clothesline for the elimination.

Off to Shawn vs. Sags with Jerry suplexing him down. Gorilla talks about how tonight will culminate at Tuesday in Texas. Again, screw you fans who bought this, as you just got part one. Some idiot fan stands up and poses for the camera so the shots keep cutting away a lot. The Rockers work on Sags’ arm before it’s off to Blake. Gorilla somehow can’t tell the Rockers apart, even though they pretty much look nothing alike.

A superkick puts Blake down but Beverly comes back with knees in the corner. Marty comes off the middle rope and shoves the referee for no apparent reason. It doesn’t go anywhere so I guess it was a mistake. Must be Colombian coke for Marty tonight. Off to Beau who doesn’t do much other than allow a tag to Butch who cleans house. The Beverlies double team him with a backdrop into a facejam for the pin and the elimination.

It’s Nasties/Beverlies vs. Rockers now with Marty coming in again. Marty monkey flips and ranas Beau down for two as Heenan and Gorilla trade statements of excitement. An enziguri puts Beau down again and it’s off to an armbar. It’s also off to Shawn who doesn’t do as well as you would expect against one of the Beverly Brothers. Off to Blake who jumps over Beau and lands on Shawn’s back in a move that the World’s Greatest Tag Team made famous.

Out of nowhere Shawn grabs a backslide on Beau for the pin to make it 3-1. Sags is in next as Gorilla thinks Marty should reach further for a tag. Even though the Rockers would split less than a month later, it wasn’t clear yet who would have gotten the super push. The Nasties head to the floor and Shawn clotheslines Sags off the apron and superkicks Knobbs down. Back in and Sags takes over again. Marty’s eyes are just gone and he looks awful.

Blake comes in again and gets kicked in the face, allowing for a falling tag to Marty. A big jumping back elbow takes Knobbs down and a snapmare gets two. Knobbs takes Jannetty down again and Heenan talks about Tuesday in Texas. Off to Sags with a powerslam and a belly to back suplex before it’s back to Knobbs. Marty gets his knees up to stop a middle rope splash and there’s the tag to Shawn. Everything breaks down and Marty swings Sags’ feet into Shawn’s face, resulting in Knobbs rolling Michaels up for the pin.

That leaves us with Marty vs. Blake and the Nasties which I don’t see going well for the coke head. Shawn freaks out on him before he leaves too to even further tease the tension. Marty starts with Knobbs and hits a middle rope bulldog but Jerry takes him down almost immediately and knocks him to the floor. A powerslam from Blake puts Marty down and the Nasties head to the floor. Jannetty dives on both of them and slams Blake’s face into the mat. Marty hooks a terrible looking small package on Sags but Knobbs rolls them over to give Jerry the final eliminating pin.

Rating: D. Man alive this was a long match. That’s the problem the rest of this show has created: there’s nothing else worth watching for the rest of the night and now they’re just filling in time to say that you’re getting a PPV that means something, when really you need to see the sequel to get the full thing. But hey, who cares about treating the fans right when you can get their money?

Gorilla and Bobby plug Tuesday in Texas again.

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

This is your main event people. Let that sink in for a minute. The LOD are the tag champions and IRS and Boss Man are having a worthless midcard feud. Boss Man and IRS start things off with the tax dude (if you need help figuring out who that is you’re beyond my help) getting thrown all over the place. Off to Animal vs. Earthquake which fires the crowd up a bit.

They collide and Animal’s cross body is caught in a backbreaker in an impressive display of strength from Quake. Back to IRS to face Hawk with the latter working on the arm. Typhoon gets the tag, only to have IRS thrown at him by Hawk. Off to Earthquake who carries Hawk to the heel corner. IRS and Boss Man come in again and it’s a briefcase shot to Boss Man’s head for the elimination.

It’s Typhoon vs. Animal now and the Disasters double team Animal in the corner. Quake suplexes him down as Monsoon talks about Bobo Brazil. IRS hits a top rope right hand for two and Typhoon puts on a bearhug. Animal escapes and hits a clothesline before tagging in Hawk. IRS misses a briefcase shot to the head and hits Typhoon by mistake, giving Hawk the easy pin.

Quake wants to fight IRS now but walks off with Typhoon instead, making it the LOD vs. IRS. Hawk powerslams IRS down but a charge goes shoulder first into the post. Hawk gets sent face first into the steps as we continue to fill time by having IRS look like he has a chance. We hit the chinlock as the announcers talk about Thanksgiving dinner. Not hot tag brings in Animal who cleans whatever is left in the house. IRS tries to walk out but runs into Boss Man in the aisle. Hawk hits a top rope clothesline for the win.

Rating: D+. We go from Hogan vs. Andre II to this in five years? That should give you a good idea as to what you’ve got going on with this show. The match was nothing and there was no reason to get excited about it, because the whole reason the match was happening had been postponed to Tuesday. In Texas.

Hogan won’t talk to the cameras about what happened.

Gene is in the bowels of the building with Bearer and Taker. Hogan will rest in peace. In Texas. They look in a casket to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Let’s take a look at what we had on this show: a really good opener, a horrible second match, a bad yet historic third match, a bad fourth match, and a worthless fifth match. This is all interspersed with a bunch of commercials for Tuesday in Texas, which is possibly the biggest bait and switch in company history. This show made me mad because it’s a big flip off to the fans, and that’s not acceptable. Watch the opener and that’s about it.

Ratings Comparison

Team Flair vs. Team Piper

Original: A-

Redo: B

Team Slaughter vs. Team Mustafa

Original: F

Redo: F

Undertaker vs. Hulk Hogan

Original: C-

Redo: D

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Original: D

Redo: D

Legion of Doom/Big Boss Man vs. IRS/Natural Disasters

Original: D

Redo: D+

Overall Rating:

Original: D+

Redo: D-

A little worse this time, but the same problems still plague this show. Screw you Vince.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:




Survivor Series 1990 (2024 Edition): The Obvious Need

Survivor Series 1990
Date: November 22, 1990
Location: Hartford Civic Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Attendance: 16,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Roddy Piper

I haven’t looked at this one in a long time so we might as well do it here. This is a big one from a historical stance, with an all time debut and something that is much more infamous than anything else. Other than that, we have the usual Survivor Series matches, plus an idea that they never used again. Let’s get to it.

We get the rather cool squares intros, showing all of the matches tonight, including the team names, which always add a nice flavor to the whole thing.

So the other deal here is that we have the Grand Finale Match of Survival, where the winners will face off again in a final Survivor Series match. Yeah I don’t get the point either.

The Ultimate Warriors promise to win. Well in theory that’s what Warrior says, as he rambles on about sacrifice and forming a bond with no medicine being able to cure what they have. I think.

Ultimate Warriors vs. Perfect Team

Ultimate Warriors: Ultimate Warrior, Texas Tornado, Legion Of Doom
Perfect Team: Mr. Perfect, Demolition

Mr. Fuji and Bobby Heenan are here with the villains. They take their sweet time settling down until Animal tackles Smash to start fast. A shot to the ribs slows Animal down and it’s Perfect coming in to stay on said ribs. Animal powerslams his way out of trouble and gets in an atomic drop, allowing the double tag to Von Erich and Ax (whose hair isn’t slicked back and who pretty clearly doesn’t want to be anywhere near this show). The Claw has Ax in trouble and it’s off to Warrior for the shoulder and splash for the elimination at 3:24. That’s the last you would see of Ax in the WWF ever again, and he can’t get out of the ring fast enough.

Crush comes in to clothesline Warrior but it’s off to Hawk to choke Perfect. One heck of a missed charge hits the post though and Demolition gets to hammer on Hawk. That doesn’t last long as Hawk is back up with a top rope clothesline and everything breaks down. The referee isn’t playing with this one and disqualifies the Legion of Doom and Demolition at 7:45, leaving us with Perfect vs. Warrior/Tornado. Piper: “I’M WRITING IT DOWN!”

Warrior comes in but Perfect wants Tornado, who comes in and knocks Perfect over the top. Perfect needs a breather on the floor so Warrior sends him into Heenan. Back in and Perfect avoids a charge into the post before going to the eyes to really keep Tornado in trouble. A ram into an exposed buckle into the PerfectPlex finishes Tornado at 11:05 and we’re one on one.

Warrior comes in and gets PerfectPlexed for two, but because it’s a finisher, he’s down for a bit. A clothesline gets two, with Warrior’s kickout sending Perfect onto the referee. That doesn’t have an impact this time as Warrior fights up and starts the clothesline comeback. The shoulder and splash finish Perfect for the win at 14:21.

Rating: D+. This was just lame in every sense of the word, as they never bothered to put in any effort, the double DQ was just lazy, and the ending was never in doubt as the villains were fighting from behind for most of the match. It was clear that Warrior had nothing to do at the moment and Perfect wasn’t a serious challenger. Pretty awful match here and still one of the worst in the show’s history.

The Million Dollar Team is ready to win, even with their absent mystery partner.

Dream Team vs. Million Dollar Team

Dream Team: Dusty Rhodes, Hart Foundation, Koko B. Ware
Million Dollar Team: Ted DiBiase, Rhythm And Blues, ???

So this is a famous one as DiBiase (Virgil) brings out the mystery partner, complete with his own manager Brother Love, the Undertaker. And this is immediately a hit, with Piper getting in the famous line of “LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT HAMHOCK!” This is one of those cases where everyone collectively went “….whoa” as you don’t see something like this very often and the people knew it.

Hart and Undertaker start things off and the proto chokeslam takes Hart down. Neidhart comes in and is immediately slammed so it’s off to Ware, who is piledriven (Monsoon: “He just got hit with the Tombstone!”) for the elimination at 1:45, instantly making Undertaker look like an absolute monster. Hart comes in and hammers away, so Undertaker glares at him and tags out in an almost eerie moment. The good guys start taking over on Valentine’s arm but he gets a knee up in the corner to cut Hart off. Honky Tonk Man comes in and is promptly powerslammed to give Neidhart the elimination at 4:24.

It’s off to DiBiase to hammer on Neidhart (makes sense on an Anvil), who fights up for the tag to the (non polka-dotted) Dusty. Elbows and a dropkick have DiBiase in trouble so it’s back to Neidhart, who gets tripped by Virgil. That’s enough for DiBiase to hit a clothesline for the elimination at 5:57, because people get pinned by clotheslines at the Survivor Series.

Hart comes back in and stomps away in the corner before Rhodes comes in and gets dropped with a shot to the face. It’s back to Undertaker, who chokes Hart in the corner but hands it back to DiBiase, who gets atomic dropped. Rhodes comes back in and gets dropped again, with Undertaker hitting a top rope ax handle to pin Rhodes at 8:33. Undertaker throws Rhodes over the top so Love can stomp away. That earns him a stalking to the back, with Undertaker following and getting counted out at 9:26, as they had to do something to avoid him getting pinned in his debut.

So it’s Hart vs. Valentine/DiBiase, but Hart small packages Valentine for the pin at 10:02 to get us down to one on one. Hart wastes no time in knocking DiBiase outside for a slingshot dive and a posting. Back in and Hart hammers away in the corner but DiBiase is back up with some chops. Hart seems to hurt his leg running the ropes, but it’s the not yet standard goldbricking so he can roll DiBiase up for two. Hart gets two off the middle rope elbow and tries a crossbody, with DiBiase rolling through for the final pin at 14:02.

Rating: B. This was a tale of two star making performances as Hart (who was dedicating the match to his brother, who had passed away the day before) had another one of those showings that made you know he was going to be something special. That being said, there’s a reason the Undertaker’s debut is one of the best ever, as sweet goodness he looked like an absolute star and you knew it was something special. Granted I don’t think anyone could have guessed how special, but it’s still effective over thirty five years later, so they’re definitely onto something.

Hart yelling F*** into the camera after the fall is oddly missing here.

The Vipers are in the shower and ready for a bunch of individual battles in their team match.

Vipers vs. Visionaries

Vipers: Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka
Visionaries: Rick Martel, Power and Glory, Warlord

This is built around Martel blinding Roberts with his arrogance cologne. Snuka is looking horrible here, with a huge afro and a not so great looking face. Jannetty and the Warlord start things off, meaning Piper can make I Am The Walrus jokes. Warlord misses a charge into the corner to start but is fine enough to shrug off some dropkicks. Jannetty picks up thee pace with some right hands and Shawn clotheslines Warlord into a sunset flip.

Martel comes in and gets hiptossed into a dropkick with Martel bailing out to the floor. Roberts grabs a wristlock on Roma and it’s quickly off to Hercules vs. Snuka. The rapid fire tags bring Jannetty back in to hammer on Warlord, who powerslams him out of the air (that looked great) for the pin at 5:19.

Michaels comes in with a hurricanrana before it’s back to Roberts for a clothesline to put Warlord down. One heck of a backdrop sends Michaels flying and Hercules drops him with a clothesline. A hard whip into the corner gets two on Michaels but he avoids a charge into the post. Snuka comes in to unload in the corner before firing off a middle rope crossbody, but Martel rolls through and grabs tights for the pin at 9:46.

Roberts comes in to go after Martel, who hands it off to Hercules, much to Roberts’ annoyance. The threat of a DDT sends Hercules bailing out to the floor and a cheap shot (as Roberts can barely see) takes Roberts down. Roma misses a top rope fist drop though and it’s back to Michaels (who was injured by Power & Glory). A middle rope elbow gets two on Roma but Hercules comes in off a blind tag to deck him from behind. Hercules drops him with a gorilla press and the PowerPlex makes it 4-1 at 15:17.

Warlord wastes no time with a bearhug but Roberts gets out. Since 4-1 isn’t enough, Roma offers a distraction so the referee doesn’t see the DDT….or Martel spraying Roberts with Arrogance. That’s enough for Roberts, so he grabs Damien and chases Martel (not legal, so not eliminated) to the back for the countout to wrap it up at 17:04.

Rating: C-. While not as bad as the opener, this was another boring match with pretty much nothing going on. Martel and company weren’t a good team but they were running through the Vipers like they weren’t even there. Michaels was his usual good self, but Snuka looked ancient, Jannetty wasn’t there long enough, and Roberts hit his one move. Another bad match as this show is remembered for one good thing for a reason.

The Hulkamaniacs have been surviving for a long time and now it’s time to do it again here. They also dedicate the match to the armed forces and are ready to go fight Saddam Hussein.

Hulkamaniacs vs. Natural Disasters

Hulkamaniacs: Hulk Hogan, Tugboat, Jim Duggan, Big Boss Man
Natural Disasters: Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Haku, Barbarian

Jimmy Hart and Bobby Heenan are here with the villains as commentary tries to figure out the lineup for the Grand Finale match. How do you know that Rick Martel is going to be a heel? Maybe he’s a Little Warrior. Big pop for Hogan too, as there was something left to this Hulkamania thing. Piper: “What are they chanting?” Gorilla: “Hogan!” Piper: “That might have been the dumbest question I’ve asked in 1990.”

Duggan and Haku slug it out to start until Haku misses a middle rope crossbody (oh geez he can fly too). Duggan’s elbow misses as well so it’s off to Bravo for an atomic drop. Boss Man comes in to slug away on Haku, who hits a dropkick to cut him off. That earns him the Boss Man Slam and Haku is out at 3:15. Boss Man kicks Barbarian in the face but goes after Heenan, allowing Barbarian to come back with a belly to back suplex. Duggan comes in but gets powered into the corner by Earthquake, who isn’t about to be slammed. Instead Duggan grabs the 2×4 to chase Hart but stops to hit Earthquake for the DQ at 6:12.

Hogan comes in to slam all three villains and hammers away at Earthquake in the corner. That’s broken up and Earthquake plants him down, allowing Bravo to drop an elbow. Hogan goes technical though and small packages Bravo for the pin at 8:00 as the villains are playing from behind again. Boss Man comes in to slug away at Earthquake….who catches a high crossbody in mid air. Sweet goodness that’s insane. Hogan breaks it up but Barbarian gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Some elbow drops get rid of Boss Man at 9:10 to get us down to 2-2, with even commentary forgetting that Tugboat was there.

Hogan hammers on Earthquake but can’t slam him this time. He can bring in Tugboat though and the brawl with Earthquake goes to the floor for the double countout at 11:34, making it Hogan vs. Barbarian. The slow beating is on and a not great piledriver gives Barbarian two. A double clothesline leaves both of them down and it’s Barbarian up first with his big clothesline. Hogan fights up and the big boot into the legdrop finishes at 14:50.

Rating: C. And that’s the second best match of the night. This was Hogan and his friends doing Hogan’s greatest hits against a pretty generic group of villains. You could see that the magic was wearing off with Hogan as he didn’t have a top opponent (after beating Earthquake at Summerslam) and the match was only so exciting. Beating Earthquake by countout on back to back pay per views didn’t help either.

Hogan beats up Heenan for fun.

Here is Randy Savage to be annoyed at being accused of….eating Thanksgiving dinner? Either way, he’s after the Ultimate Warrior and the WWF Title, because it is being held by the Ultimate Chicken. Queen Sherri did NOT do his fighting for him when he slapped the Warrior because he is the greatest Superstar of all time.

Alliance vs. Mercenaries

Alliance: Nikolai Volkoff, Tito Santana, Bushwhackers
Mercenaries: Sgt. Slaughter, Boris Zhukov, Orient Express

Before the match, Slaughter mocks the American troops in the Middle East for not having a good Thanksgiving dinner. Piper is TICKED over this, to the point where I’m surprised he and Slaughter never had a title match. Butch hammers on Zhukov to start and it’s off to Santana for the flying forearm and the pin at 50 seconds. As the heels are behind AGAIN. The Battering Ram gets rid of Sato at 1:51 as they’re making it pretty clear that this match doesn’t need to be a Survivor Series match because a bunch of people are going to be gone fast.

Tanaka kicks Butch down and misses a headbutt, meaning it’s another forearm to make it 4-1 at 2:11. Volkoff comes in to hammer away in the corner but gets dropped with a clothesline. Some elbow drops begin the slow beatdown, capped off with another elbow for the pin at 5:26. The Bushwhackers are in with a double clothesline but Luke’s top rope splash hits knees. A gutbuster gives Slaughter the pin at 6:32 and Butch is out to a clothesline at 6:55.

So it’s Santana vs. Slaughter with Santana coming in off the top with a forearm to take over. Slaughter is right back with a neckbreaker and a backbreaker gets two. A suplex gives Slaughter a delayed two but the referee gets bumped. Santana hits the forearm but General Adnan comes in with the flag shot for the DQ to end this at 10:35.

Rating: D+. This show is terrible and there isn’t much of a way to hide it. It was clear that this needed to be Santana vs. Slaughter, as the match would have been better and let us skip six eliminations in about seven minutes. At the same time, Slaughter wasn’t feeling like a top heel here and there wasn’t much of a way around it.

Ted DiBiase and the Visionaries are ready for Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior and Tito Santana, because Warrior and Hogan had issues just a few months ago at Wrestlemania.

And now, it’s time for the egg to hatch. Yeah there has been a big egg for weeks and it finally hatches to reveal….a humanoid turkey thing which Gene Okerlund dubs the Gobbledy Gooker. He and Gene go to the ring to dance and the fans boo this out of the building, as it’s just a big waste of time that adds nothing. The idea was to make a fun mascot for kids but that could have been covered by someone like Jim Duggan in a costume. Also, when you’re expecting anything interesting and get…whatever this was. This is an all time disaster and it has become a running joke for almost forty years as a result.

Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior and Tito Santana don’t think they’re behind because the Hulkamaniacs are in their corner.

Hulk Hogan/Tito Santana/Ultimate Warrior vs. Visionaries/Ted DiBiase

Santana forearms Warlord for the pin at 24 seconds. Roma powerslams Santana down and DiBiase comes in with a suplex for two. Santana misses the forearm and gets caught with a hot shot for the pin at 1:52. Hogan comes in to hammer on DiBiase but Hercules comes in to get a few shots of his own. The villains keep taking turns hammering on Hogan as even Piper is telling him to get it together already. DiBiase gets two off a fist drop but the PowerPlex triggers the Hulk Up.

The clothesline finishes Roma at 5:39 so Martel comes in for the ineffective hammering. Hogan kicks him down and hands it off to Warrior who slams Martel a few times, allowing Hogan to clothesline Martel to the floor for a countout at 7:23. It’s down to DiBiase/Hercules, which would be a lot more interesting about two years ago. Hogan powers DiBiase into the corner, hits the boot and drops the leg to make it 2-1 at 8:38. The powerslam lets Warrior come back in for a shoulder and the splash to win it all at 9:09.

Rating: D. Good grief they actually made it less interesting. I didn’t think this could get worse as the rest of the show had bee but they pulled it off. I’m not sure what the point of this was other than to get Hogan and Warrior out there again, but it doesn’t really make much of a difference when we saw them both in the last few hours. Nothing to see here, with Hogan and Warrior running through some midcard villains in short order.

Overall Rating: D. There is one good match in almost two and half hours here and that match is mostly memorable for one debut and nothing more. Other than that, it was a good illustration of how things needed to change. The 80s were over and Warrior wasn’t working on top, but Hogan’s act was fairly tired and not the long term solution.

That being said, the biggest problem is the lack of major villains. Warrior had Mr. Perfect, Hogan had already had his big match with Earthquake, and other than that you had Savage on the way up, but that’s not enough to fight two superpowers. Slaughter was getting a reaction but it absolutely did not have any kind of long term shelf life. Undertaker looked good, but it was his first night and he needed time to be turned into something big.

The whole thing didn’t work and it just kept getting worse. The Gooker stuff was the big, horrible icing on the whole thing as this was a bad show, with Undertaker and Bret Hart not being enough to come close to saving it. This show was pretty bad and the company was in need of a big overhaul, which would take a lot of time.

 

 

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Velocity – June 8, 2002: Enough With The Tough

Velocity
Date: June 8, 2002
Location: Cox Convention Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Al Snow

This popped up on the Vault and while it’s billed as the Full Episode, it would appear that something has been taken out. That doesn’t leave much, but it’s a rather different era from the company and a rather forgotten one at that, so it’s definitely worth a look. This is only the third episode of the series so let’s get to it.

Opening sequence. My that’s a lot of green.

Test vs. Randy Orton

Orton has only been around for about a month and a half here. Test jumps him from behind to start and hammers away in the corner as we get the opening bell. Orton is back up with a dropkick to the back but Test gives him a running clothesline in the corner. Test does it again but Orton manages a quick DDT. A high crossbody gets two, only for Test to grab the pumphandle slam for two. Orton’s Overdrive gets the same but Test is back with a Roll of the Dice (I believe he called it the Test Drive) for the pin at 3:57.

Rating: C+. This actually turned into a decent match, with Test being on a roll at the moment and picking up another win. Orton was still just the big prospect and had a very long way to go, but you could see the potential in there. It would take time for him to put it together, but the way commentary was hyping him up made his future pretty clear.

We look back at Ivory getting annoyed at Tough Enough winners Linda Miles and Jackie Gayda introducing themselves to Vince McMahon. Vince put them in a match on Velocity, marking the only time that he would ever mention the show.

Godfather vs. Hugh Morrus

Godfather does not look happy to be out here and jumps Morrus in the corner to start. Morrus shrugs that off and hammers away, only to get shoved HARD out of the corner in a great visual. A running clothesline gives Godfather two and Morrus’ powerslam gets the same. Godfather goes to get the bell, which distracts the referee (one Teddy Long) enough for Godfather to hit Morrus with his cane for the win at 3:18.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what the point is in having a heel Godfather, as the whole point was him being the fun, energetic opening match star. Instead he just looks like he’s doing something of an Undertaker knockoff and that makes for a less than thrilling match. Then again he’s in there with Morrus so it’s only going to be so good in the first place.

We look at Edge having a heck of a cage match with Kurt Angle but injuring his shoulder in the process. That puts him out of the King Of The Ring and Chris Jericho comes in to mock him, demanding that Edge raise his hand for winning their match via forfeit. Instead Edge tried to fight and got beaten up even worse. Jericho crushed his bad shoulder on the steps with a chair until the Big Valbowski made the save…and the show just ends abruptly mid brawl. This is billed as the “full show” but there is quite a bit missing. Anyway, Valbowski throws Jericho out and stands tall.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Funaki

Funaki kicks away to start but makes the mistake of turning his back on Guerrero. That earns a ram into the corner and a dropkick to the back. Funaki’s comeback is quickly cut off but he sends Guerrero outside for a slingshot dive. Back in and an enziguri gives Funaki two but Guerrero backbreakers him for the same. The brainbuster finishes for Guerrero at 4:35.

Rating: C+. As usual, you can take two talented wrestlers and let them do their thing. It’s not like this match was ever going to be anything more than two guys doing moves for a few minutes. Funaki could work well with anyone and the same was true of Guerrero, who just happened to be a much bigger star.

Jackie Gayda gives Linda Miles a pep talk before the match with Ivory. Gayda would love to be in her corner, which works for Miles.

We look at HHH and Hulk Hogan winning a battle royal to become the new #1 contender to the World Title. HHH beat Hogan later in the night to get the title shot. They posed after the match and got beaten up by Undertaker (the reigning champion) and Kurt Angle (who is certainly NOT bald).

We look at Linda and Jackie winning Tough Enough.

Linda Miles vs. Ivory

Jackie Gayda is here with Miles. Ivory grabs a headlock takeover to start fast so Miles reverses into a headscissors. Back up and a running shoulder puts Ivory down but she sends Miles throat first into the bottom rope. Miles fires off some clotheslines and a suplex before going up…where Gayda shoves her down. A facebuster gives Ivory the pin at 3:54.

Rating: D+. I remember watching this show as it aired and Gayda turning on Miles was obvious the second she asked to be in Miles’ corner. They were barely trying to hide it and that doesn’t make for a good moment here. Throw in that Miles was still a rookie and would never get much better and there was hardly much to see here.

Overall Rating: C. This was only the third episode of the show so WWE still cared about it for the time being, which was apparent here. This had some big enough names involved and a turn at the end, though there is only so much you can get out of a show like this one. That being said, it’s almost a breath of fresh air just to see something out of the blue like this. I have no idea why it was cut off, but the other half is easily available to find elsewhere.

 

 

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UK Rampage 1992 (2025 Edition): Those Two Do Their Thing

UK Rampage 1992
Date: April 19, 1992
Location: Sheffield Arena, Sheffield, England
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Bobby Heenan

So here we have what sounds like a Coliseum Video but instead is a full show, which was broadcast on Sky over in England. It’s basically a big house show that is presented as a pay per view, which means the card could be all over the place. If nothing else, the WWF Title match is pretty well known so let’s get to it.

The opening video is as generic as you can get, showing some people on the show.

Commentary welcomes us to the show.

Tatanka vs. Skinner

Oh yeah it’s going to be one of those shows. They circle each other for a long time to start until Tatanka grabs a headlock. A sunset flip gets one and it’s right back to the headlock, allowing Heenan to try to pronounce Tatanka. Back up and a clothesline gives Tatanka two, followed by a chop to send Skinner bailing up the aisle.

They get back inside and Tatanka starts in on the arm but Skinner takes him down to work on the leg. Said leg is stretches a good bit until Skinner wraps it around the post. A suplex brings Tatanka down but he gets a boot up to knock Skinner out of the air. The middle rope chop sets up the Papoose To Go to finish Skinner off at 11:53.

Rating: C-. This was a slow match and while it was technically fine, it wasn’t exactly interesting. Tatanka is a popular enough star and a good opening match guy, but there wasn’t much to see here. Then again it’s just the opener of a European special event so it’s only going to be so much.

The Legion Of Doom is ready for anyone including….Colonel Mustafa and Dino Bravo? Oh yeah this is a weird kind of show.

Legion Of Doom vs. Colonel Mustafa/Dino Bravo

Dark haired Bravo always looks weird. The villains are whipped into each other to start and a double clothesline sends Bravo outside. Back in and Animal’s exchange of shoulders with Bravo goes nowhere but Hawk’s flying shoulder takes Bravo down as I try to figure out why this is supposed to be hard for the LOD.

Hawk goes shoulder first into the post as Heenan talks about meeting a woman named Martha at a French restaurant but she wouldn’t pick up the check. They get back in and Mustafa grabs a gutwrench suplex but Animal breaks up an abdominal stretch. A double clothesline allows Hawk to get over for the tag to Animal, meaning house is quickly cleaned. The top rope clothesline finishes Mustafa at 4:30.

Rating: D. What else could you have been expecting here? Bravo and Mustafa might as well have been a pair of jobbers but they actually got in a bit of offense. Unfortunately that’s not what should have been done here, as it should have been total destruction. Also, they really didn’t have a better option than this? No one was available?

Sid Justice talks about how Undertaker doesn’t do much reading (….ok). Justice has recently read a book called The Night Of The Juggler where the victim looks into the eyes of his killer and knows it’s over. That’s what’s waiting for the Undertaker.

Paul Bearer and Undertaker have come across the great sea to deliver a present: a tombstone.

Sid Justice vs. Undertaker

Harvey Wippleman and Paul Bearer are here too. Justice jumps him to start but Undertaker fights out and slugs away. Old School connects as does a flying clothesline, but Sid is right back with the chokeslam (which the camera mostly misses). A side slam drops Undertaker again and Sid hammers away, only for Undertaker to come back with a clothesline. They fight to the floor and I don’t see this ending well. Undertaker gets posted and a rather fast countout gives Sid the win at 5:17.

Rating: D+. Sweet goodness they really can’t have a good match together. What are you supposed to do when the camera doesn’t see Sid’s big move and the match is barely five minutes long with a countout? These two never worked well together and it was on full display again here, even if it wasn’t entirely their fault this time.

Post match Sid hits him with a chair and grabs a neckbreaker (more a hair takedown). Undertaker shrugs those off and Tombstones him. So Sid can take it after the match but not do a job on a show like this?

Shawn Michaels, with Sherri, is ready to win the WWF Title.

WWF Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Randy Savage

Savage, with Elizabeth (to oppose Sherri), is defending after winning the title at Wrestlemania two weeks ago. Savage knocks him down to start and gets a knee up to stop a charge in the corner. Michaels sends him outside and Savage tosses in a chair as Heenan complains about Wrestlemania. Back in and Michaels tries skinning the cat but gets clotheslined outside again. Savage drops the top rope ax handle and we’re clipped (this match was on the Randy Savage Mixtape on the same YouTube channel with no clip so I have no idea what’s up with this) to Michaels sending him into the barricade.

A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker drops Savage for two and Michaels whips him into the corner to keep him in trouble. Savage fights back with a catapult into the post and a clothesline, followed by a top rope ax handle for two. He tries it again but gets punched out of the air, allowing Michaels to hit his own clothesline for a delayed two. The yet to be a big deal superkick gets two and the top rope fist drop sends Savage outside.

Even Sherri gets in a shot of her own before Savage is thrown back inside, where Michaels tosses him right back outside. Back in again and Michaels fires off the left hands but Savage kicks him in the face. The referee gets bumped, leaving Savage to hit his neck snap across the top. The top rope elbow connects for no count so Sherri comes in to kick at Savage. Monsoon: “GET UP AND PUNCH HER IN THE MOUTH RANDY!”

The referee is back up for a very delayed two and Sherri is on the ropes, which is enough for Elizabeth to come back down and shove her over the top. A high crossbody gives Savage two so Sheri gets on the apron again, with Elizabeth pulling her down this time. Savage misses a charge into the corner and gets sunset flipped down for two. A spinning high crossbody gives Savage the pin at 15:25 (the match usually runs about 16:20 so the cut clipped out nearly a minute).

Rating: B. This has been on a bunch of home video releases and it’s included for a reason. These two had great chemistry together and it was nice to see Savage getting a chance to actually get in the ring during his second title reign. You could see Michaels becoming a bigger star every day at this point and there is a reason he was given this kind of spot against a star like Savage. It worked well, especially with something different than the usual Savage formula of the big elbow.

Post match Sherri hits Michaels by mistake and a double noggin knocker sends the villains outside. Savage and Elizabeth get to pose together.

Here are the Bushwhackers for a chat, with Bobby Heenan saying they remind him of Eddie The Eagle (famously not great British skiier). This includes going around ringside and walking through the crowd, which feels quite a bit like filler. They finally get to the stage and love the people and country of England. Oh and the sheep are nice too. We have talks of rabbits and Sean Mooney is given a hat.

Jimmy Hart and the Mountie insist that they would NEVER take advantage of Virgil’s broken nose. The Mountie is not impressed with London, as he saw a cop who looked like Virgil sleeping on the job.

Virgil is happy to have his nose guard and is ready to fight Mountie. He floats like a butterfly and stings like a bee.

Virgil vs. The Mountie

Jimmy Hart is here with the Mountie. The bell rings and Virgil bails to the floor to avoid the shock stick. Back in and Virgil starts punching away and sends Mountie face first into the buckle over and over. They head outside with Virgil hammering away again before taking Mountie’s shirt back inside.

Mountie fights up and slugs away, including a shot with the shirt. A bulldog lets Mountie put his shirt back on and he mixes it up a bit with a half nelson/hammerlock combination. We pause for Mountie to grab the mic and shout his name, which is enough for Virgil to make a comeback. Hart trips Virgil and Mountie uses the distraction to get in a shot with the shock stick for the win at 8:55.

Rating: D. This was pretty terrible, as it was just a bunch of waiting around and doing basic stuff, with the shirt getting far too much attention. Virgil and Mountie weren’t exactly thrilling stars in the first place, but then they had a boring match. Not good, too long and dull, which makes for a rough combination.

Rick Martel doesn’t like English fashion and is ready to teach Bret Hart a thing or two about what it means to be a wrestling technician.

Bret Hart says this is about wrestling instead of fashion. How astute of him.

Intercontinental Title: Bret Hart vs. Rick Martel

Hart is defending. Feeling out process to start and they lock up against the ropes, with Martel slapping him in the face. Martel slugs away but his O’Connor roll attempt is blocked. Hart clotheslines him to the floor, only to get front facelocked back inside. That’s broken up and Hart starts on the leg, including cranking away on the mat. This allows Monsoon to tell a story about a cab driver being offered FIFTY TIMES the value of his ticket but turning it down. Heenan: “And that’s why he’s driving a cab.”

A spinning toehold keeps Martel down as Monsoon uses big words to describe the leg. Heenan: “Keep it simple for the humanoids! He kicked him in the thigh!” Martel fights up but gets caught in a shinbreaker, with the leg being wrapped around the post. A quick ram into the post gets Martel out of trouble and he drops some elbows on the back. Hart fights up with the Five Moves Of Doom but gets sent crashing out to the floor. Back in and Hart can’t get an O’Connor roll, but he can get a small package to retain at 13:03.

Rating: B-. Of course these two worked well together as they’re both talented veterans and Hart was rapidly becoming one of the more important stars in the company. That’s a great sign for his future and putting him out there with a great hand like Martel made sense. It’s one of those formulas that pretty much guarantees success, which is why Hart was featured so often.

Jim Duggan thanks the fans for chanting USA because it makes the hair on his neck stand up. As for Repo Man, he’s ready for a fight instead of a match.

Repo Man vs. Jim Duggan

They stall a bunch to start, with Duggan calling for a few USA chants. Duggan trips him down and shrugs off some right hands. A few clotheslines have Repo in trouble and he gets sent outside, somehow managing to sneak up on Duggan. Back in and Duggan’s right hands set up an atomic drop to send Repo right back outside. Another cheap shot lets Repo take the turnbuckle pad off and Duggan is sent face first into the steel.

Heenan isn’t sure that will make a difference so Repo chokes on the rope. Duggan is sent into a regular buckle and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up and Duggan misses a charge into the exposed buckle. Duggan sends him face first into the exposed steel as well so Repo grabs the steel hook and knocks Duggan silly for the DQ at 7:14.

Rating: D-. Sweet goodness what is up with the lame finishes on this show? Again, you really can’t have the Repo Man take a pin here? It just feels so ridiculous to see them do such a boring match and then finish with that kind of weak DQ. Nothing to see here, as has been the case too many times here.

Post match Repo chokes away and ties him in the ropes until the referee cuts off a big hook shot. Duggan gets the 2×4 and hides before chasing Repo off, meaning we get one more USA chant.

Randy Savage insists he and Miss Elizabeth are doing well and says they should have a second and third honeymoon over here. Savage is ready for all contenders, from the British Bulldog to Ric Flair.

Bobby Heenan has an empty coffee pot, which he says is the trophy British Bulldog won in a battle royal in London.

The British Bulldog promises to make IRS pay in the ring.

British Bulldog vs. IRS

IRS has Jimmy Hart with him. Bulldog’s reaction is as strong as you would expect and that’s why he’s in the main event. Bulldog grabs a headlock and shoves him away before a rather hard shoulder drops IRS again. We pause a bit for the fans to cheer the Bulldog, with even Heenan having to acknowledge the reception.

A clothesline sends IRS outside so he comes back in, runs the ropes, and bails to the floor again. Bulldog works on the arm but gets sent outside, with IRS kicking him in the ribs a few times to take over. Back in again and Bulldog gets two off a rollup but IRS drops him with the flying clothesline. The chinlock goes on for a good while, with Bulldog being sent outside.

This lets Heenan announce that Shawn Michaels HAS LEFT THE BUILDING. As usual, Monsoon doesn’t care, though he is more interested in Bulldog getting two off a sunset flip. The delayed vertical suplex has IRS in more trouble but he manages another cheap shot. Hart’s distraction tries to let IRS get the briefcase but Bulldog blocks it without much trouble. The running powerslam finishes IRS off at 12:45.

Rating: C. This wasn’t much of a match but there was no way it could end with anything but the Bulldog hitting a powerslam for the win. He was the crowd’s ultimate hero and that’s about as much of a layup as you can get. The match means nothing and isn’t even that good, but it’s all it needed to be.

Bulldog celebrates for a long time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Yes a show from the early 90s is carried by Bret and Shawn (and Savage). I’m as shocked as you are, even if it’s exactly what happened at a lot of shows around this time. It doesn’t help that the show was full of nothing matches with terrible endings, but I guess the fans were supposed to just be happy to see the wrestling live. Which did work so who needs effort?

 

 

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Smackdown – September 26, 2008: He Doesn’t Seem Merciful

Smackdown
Date: September 26, 2008
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

We’re still dealing with undertaker trying to stalk Vickie Guerrero and La Familia, though he might need to have more than just his arm show up this week. The other big story is Jeff Hardy still chasing HHH and the World Title, with their showdown at No Mercy coming up in less than two weeks. Throw in the question of who gets wrapped in bubble wrap this week and we’ve got a heck of a show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vladimir Kozlov deciding he wanted better competition and taking out Jeff Hardy and HHH last week.

Opening sequence.

Chavo Guerrero is in Vickie Guerrero’s office and is worried about the Undertaker choking him last week. Undertaker is coming for Vickie tonight so she sends him to get Big Show. Jeff Hardy pops in and says he wants Vladimir Kozlov but Vickie tells him to worry about No Mercy. Oh and their tag match tonight. Show comes in to put his arm around Vickie. This Undertaker hunts La Familia stuff is really not working.

HHH/Jeff Hardy vs. MVP/Brian Kendrick

HHH works on MVP’s arm to start and it’s off to Hardy for a top rope ax handle to the same arm. Kendrick comes in and gets headlocked but manages to take Hardy into the corner. That’s broken up rather quickly and MVP gets caught with the legdrop between the legs. HHH’s running clothesline sends MVP outside and Kendrick gets dropped onto him for the crash as we take a break.

We come back with HHH getting double teamed in the corner, followed by Kendrick hitting a dropkick for two. Kendrick misses a dive though and it’s Hardy coming in as JR calls this an “opening main event”. I’ll let you try to figure that out as Hardy misses a dive of his own for a rather delayed two, meaning MVP can come in. Some knees to the ribs slow Hardy down and Kendrick kicks him in the head for two.

MVP comes back in and slaps on a seated abdominal stretch, which is broken rather quickly. Kendrick hits a dropkick and the Whisper In The Wind, with the fans being VERY pleased. The big tag brings in HHH and everything breaks down. Hardy takes Kendrick out and MVP misses a big boot, leaving him to walk into the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: B-. It definitely felt like a main event tag match and that’s a fine enough way to go. Hardy vs. HHH is already set for No Mercy and this was a way to move us towards the title match. The fans believe in Hardy and while it would have made more sense for him to get the pin, the result is what matters the most.

Video on the Great Khali, who is ready to face Vladimir Kozlov tonight.

Commentary thanks the fans for the CW for the last two years and the people who have worked with them over the years.

Classics On Demand: Sid/Ric Flair vs. Hogan/Piper at MSG. That sounds fun.

Here is Shelton Benjamin for a chat. He brags about being awesome in every way, which are as solid as the US Title on his shoulder. That’s why it bothers him to see R-Truth coming out here singing and dancing. What makes it even worse is the fans singing along with him…and here is R-Truth to interrupt. He asks Benjamin what’s up and Benjamin, with a bit of a quivering lip, walks out.

Brie Bella/Maria vs. Victoria/Natalya

Victoria shoves Maria down to start but she forearms her way out of trouble. Brie comes in and gets driven into the wrong corner, with Natalya wrestling her to the mat. A snap suplex gets two on Bella and Victoria comes back in for a full nelson. That’s broken up and Bella tries an anklescissors out of the corner but gets sent outside. Bella goes underneath the ring…and comes out from another side WAY too fast, apparently having grown to about eight feet tall and being incredibly flexible. Back in and Bella gets two off an X Factor before Maria’s high crossbody connects for the pin.

Rating: C. We’re getting pretty close to what is going on here and now it’s rather hard to hide the big twist. That’s what they’re showing here, which makes for an interesting future. It’s not like there is anything else going on here, but it’s nice to see some non-title feuds in the division for a change. The women can get a lot out of that kind of story, along with just offering some variety.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. The Great Khali

Kozlov goes for the leg to start and gets forearmed in the back to cut that off. Instead Kozlov fires off the headbutts to the chest, only to get chopped in the head. A big boot sends Kozlov outside, where he avoids a headbutt into the post. Cue HHH to stare Kozlov down and Khali gets back inside, with HHH slugging at him. We’ll say the match was thrown out somewhere in there.

Post match the double beatdown is on until Jeff Hardy makes the save, with HHH grabbing a sledgehammer to chase the monsters away.

No Mercy rundown.

Chavo Guerrero warns Vickie Guerrero that Undertaker might get to her tonight but Big Show doesn’t want to hear this. We actually watch the video of Show beating Undertaker up, which played FOUR TIMES last week. Vickie sends Chavo to the ring for a match, which is quite the surprise.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

During Guerrero’s entrance, Hurricane Helms pops up in an insert promo, telling him to run from the Undertaker. Yang dropkicks him to the floor to start but Guerrero is able to dropkick him out of the air. The armbar goes on before they go outside, where Guerrero stays on said arm. Back in and another armbar is broken up, with Yang scoring off a missile dropkick. The running spinwheel kick in the corner sets up a high crossbody for two but Yang misses the moonsault. Guerrero hits Three Amigos into a rolling Liger kick of all things for the pin.

Rating: C+. Yang is one of those valuable people who can go out there and make anyone look good. It’s kind of a shame that he’s stuck with a comedy gimmick and is little more than existing to help everyone else. You can do something else with him, maybe in a tag team, but that really doesn’t seem likely whatsoever.

Post match the lights go out and Guerrero panics.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Colons

The Colons are challenging. Primo and Hawkins start things off with Primo sending him into the ropes and grabbing a jumping anklescissors. Carlito comes in and hammers away but misses a charge into the post, allowing the champs to start in on the arm. A hammerlock and slam stay on the arm, with Carlito being knocked into the corner to cut off a comeback bid.

Ryder slaps on another armbar until Carlito fights up for a sunset flip, only for Ryder to bring Hawkins back in. Carlito is dumped out to the floor and we take a break. We come back with Carlito fighting out of a chinlock and sending the champions (with a loud CRACK) into each other. Primo comes back in to slug away but gets rolled up by Ryder for two. Carlito gets a blind tag though and hits a Backstabber for the fast pin and the titles.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t overly entertaining and I rewound the ending a few times as I kept thinking I was missing something. Carlito and Primo aren’t exactly a red hot team but it’s not like Hawkins and Ryder were doing anything impressive anyway. It’s a nice way to send things over to MyNetworkTV as a title change always feels at least somewhat important.

Minor note: when Carlito gets the pin, he celebrates a bit, which should be the case when you win something. Do that more often.

Post match Jesse and Festus come out with the moving van.

We cut to the back where Chavo Guerrero is panicking over the Undertaker. Vickie Guerrero and Big Show are going to the ring, with Guerrero agreeing to join them out of fear.

During the break, Jesse and Festus moved some stuff into their van, which had Ryan Braddock and Kenny Dykstra.

Here are Big Show and the Guerreros for a chat. After some EXCUSE ME’s, Vickie calls out Undertaker, who has physically and mentally obliterated Edge. We look back at Unforgiven (sweet goodness move on) and come back to the arena, where Show promises to destroy the Undertaker.

The lights go out and Chavo disappears…and then Undertaker is choking Guerrero backstage. Show gives chase and we see Undertaker destroying Chavo even more. The screen goes to static so Tazz tries to go interview Vickie, but the lights go out again. Tazz is instantly back on commentary and Undertaker is alone in the ring with Vickie. A Tombstone ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. The title change was a nice moment and Hardy vs. HHH is being set up well, but egads this Vickie/Undertaker stuff is not working. Unfortunately that’s one of the dominant stories on the show right now and it’s making for such a dull portion week after week. I liked parts of the show, but once HHH and Hardy were gone, the interest went sailing out the window.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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WWE Vault – Fatal Fourway Collection: What A Nice Surprise

Fatal Four Way Collection
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles, Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler, Cyrus, Joey Styles, Byron Saxton, Renee Young, Tom Phillips, Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph, Aiden English, Jim Cornette

I have no idea why this is something that was necessary, though if you can run a pay per view about it, you can do this too. In this case, I’m not sure how interesting this is going to be as the concept can get tiring rather quickly. Hopefully the action is enough to keep things moving for over two hours so let’s get to it.

From Rebellion 2000.

WWF Title: Kurt Angle vs. Rikishi vs. The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Angle is defending, no countouts or DQ’s and this is Evil Rikishi. The fact that Angle comes out second tells you about where he’s standing at the moment. The brawl is on to start fast with Rock and Rikishi fighting out to the floor, leaving Austin to hit a spinebuster for two on Angle. Rikishi pulls Austin outside so we can switch off a bit, leaving Rock to Samoan drop Angle for two more.

Back up and Rock sends Angle flying over the top as Rikishi and Austin come back in. That means Rikishi gets caught between the superheroes for a bunch of right hands, followed by some double stomping. Angle tries to leave, which doesn’t work for Rock, even if that’s not the wisest move. Austin Thesz presses Rikishi for the right hands and Rock sends Angle back in for a Thesz press from Austin as well.

Angle and Austin head to the floor again with Austin using a cable to choke on the announcers’ table. Rikishi crushes Rock in the corner but the Stinkface is blocked with a well timed low blow. The People’s Elbow gets two, with Angle having to come in for the save. We slow down a bit as the heels take over in something of a mini tag match. As you might expect, Rock and Austin fight back rather quickly and it’s time for the big staredown.

Austin gets the better of things but Rock punches his way out of the corner. That just earns him a Stunner for two with Angle making another save. Tazz: “I cannot believe that Austin just Stunned the Rock.” As I try to figure out why that would confuse him, Austin stomps Angle down in the corner.

That takes too long though and it’s a Rock Bottom for two, with Rikishi pulling the referee out. Back in and the Angle Slam gets a VERY delayed two on Rock but here are Edge and Christian to help Angle. Austin beats them up and it’s a Rock Bottom to Rikishi, with Edge making the save. Cue the Radicalz as Austin Stuns Rikishi for two, with Saturn making the save. Another Angle Slam pins Rikishi to retain the title at 8:50.

Rating: B-. It was fun while it lasted but it didn’t last very long. Rikishi as a big time heel never worked and he was clearly going to be the one to take the fall the second he was introduced. That’s not a terrible thing though, especially for a special England only pay per view in the first place. The rest of the match was your usual stuff and given the circumstances, that was acceptable enough.

From ECW On Sci Fi, August 28, 2007.

The Miz vs. CM Punk vs. Big Daddy V vs. Boogeyman

For a future shot at the ECW Title. V jumps Boogeyman so Miz and Punk jump V, who shrugs all three of them off at once. We get the Boogeyman vs. V showdown but Miz pulls Boogeyman outside. That leaves Punk to dive on V, who throws him outside for the big crash. V beats on Miz and Punk outside but misses a charge and crashes over the barricade.

Punk gets sent into the steps though and Miz is there to jump Boogeyman back inside. Miz’s running corner clothesline gets two on Punk and we hit the chinlock, which is kind of nutty in a four way. Punk is back up with the running knee and bulldog, followed by the top rope clothesline for two. The GTS finishes Miz at 7:07.

Rating: C. This was a really weird choice as it basically turned into a singles match with about three minutes to go. Boogeyman and V just vanished from the thing and never showed up again. I kept waiting for one of them to do something but instead it was just punk shrugging off Miz’s offense and beating him. That’s a fine way to go, but what a weird way to get there.

Post match V beats up Boogeyman as they magically reappear.

From Capital Carnage.

Steve Austin vs. Mankind vs. vs. Kane vs. Undertaker

Yeah that’s a lineup. Gerald Brisco is guest referee and Big Boss Man is guest enforcer. Kane goes after Mankind before the other two come to the ring but the lights go out for Undertaker’s rather slow paced entrance. The brawl continues throughout the lengthy entrance, with the camera on Undertaker because the wrestling itself is just a detail. They finally stop fighting but Kane knocks Mankind into a chokeslam from Undertaker, leaving the monsters to brawl.

Kane is sent outside and here is Austin as the fight is on again. Undertaker and Austin fight on the ramp and then come back to ringside as Vince McMahon is rather nervous on commentary. With Austin down, Undertaker switches off to Mankind but Austin (still in his vest) is back up and sent inside. Undertaker joins him and gets hit in the face, followed by some choking with the vest.

The jumping clothesline hits Austin (Vince: “YEAH BOY!”) for two as Mankind keeps punching Kane on the floor. Paul Bearer goes JJ Dillon with a shoe to Austin’s head but Austin is back up with a Thesz press to Undertaker. Austin covers and Brisco hurts his knee (doesn’t feel like a screwjob), allowing Kane to make the save. All four finally get inside for the first time a mere seven minutes in and Undertaker and Mankind are outside seven and a half minutes in. The other two go outside and Vince gets mad at Mankind for not attacking Austin.

Back in and Kane chokes Undertaker in the corner while the other two are down. Kane goes after Mankind as JR and Vince get in a spat over Austin. Old School is broken up and Undertaker gets crotched on top, sending the two of them to the floor. Mankind offers Austin a handshake but gets kicked in the ribs, meaning it’s time for the Mandible Claw. Undertaker crotches Mankind against the post and Austin gets double teamed by the giants. We’ll make that triple teamed but Austin fights back, with a chair being brought in.

Mankind breaks up a spoke Tombstone onto the chair but gets his head cracked by Undertaker’s chair shot. Austin covers but Brisco just stops counting. Mankind and Undertaker go outside so Austin hits the Stunner on Kane. Brisco needs to know the time, so Austin decks him down. Undertaker is back in with chokeslams to Austin and Kane, with a regular referee coming in to count as Mankind makes the save. Austin Stuns Kane again for the pin at 16:11.

Rating: B-. This was longer than it needed to be and dragged in the middle, but it felt like a pay per view main event rather than a spruced up house show match. Austin winning is of course the only way to go, though I was expecting Mankind to take the fall. Good enough stuff here, though trimming off three minutes or so would have helped.

From ECW Heat Wave 2000.

Little Guido vs. Psicosis vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

This doesn’t fit the bill so here is Mikey Whipwreck to make it better.

Little Guido vs. Psicosis vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Yeah that works. They start by kicking each other in the head (shocking I know), with Guido kicking Tajiri out to the floor. Whipwreck hurricanranas Guido and Stuns Tajiri, followed by the running flip dive to the floor. Cue Tony Mamaluke, who gets taken down by Whipwreck. For some reason, Whipwreck dives onto the 500lb Big Sal and is quickly posted. Psicosis hits the guillotine legdrop and Guido pins Whipwreck for the elimination at 1:36.

So that leaves us with the original match, with Tajiri hurricanranaing Psicosis. Guido pulls Psicosis to the floor so Tajiri can hit a nice Asai moonsault onto the two of them. Back in and Tajiri superplexes Guido so Psicosis can hit a somersault legdrop for two (that’s a surprising kickout). An Unprettier hits Psicosis and Tajiri’s bridging German suplex gives Tajiri the pin at 4:28.

We’re down to Guido vs. Tajiri, with the latter kicking him down and getting two off another suplex. The handspring elbow connects and it’s time for a chair (of course). Guido fights back with a Sicilian Slice and kicks Tajiri outside. That lets Guido flip off the fans but the Unprettier is broken up as well. Instead Tajiri kicks him down and hits the brainbuster onto the chair for the pin at 9:18.

Rating: C+. I’m not a huge fan of the “let’s add someone in just so we can eliminate them in a hurry and then get back to the original match”. It just makes me wonder what the point of the addition was in the first place and that was the case here. At least Psicosis was there instead of Super Crazy, as that three way dance had been done to death.

From Insurrextion 2001.

Hardy Boyz vs. X Factor vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Edge And Christian

Elimination rules. Albert is here with X Factor and grabs Bubba’s leg to start, allowing Credible to hammer away. That works in a grand total of no way as Bubba fights back and knocks Credible into the corner. Matt and Christian come in with Christian getting the better of things until Matt neckbreakers his way out of trouble. Jeff comes in to quite the reaction and crossbodies Edge for two.

It’s off to X-Pac to take over on Jeff, who snaps off a headscissors and it’s back to Matt. X-Pac is right back with a crotching against the post, followed by a Bronco Buster. Matt double clotheslines X-Factor down and Jeff comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Jeff misses Poetry In Motion. Matt gives X-Pac the Twist Of Fate and, after Albert misses a splash, Jeff drops a Swanton for the elimination at 5:48. X Factor beats up Matt, leaving Christian to Unprettier Jeff for the pin at 6:03.

We’re down to Edge And Christian vs. the Dudleys with the Canadians being whipped into each other. D-Von powerslams Christian for two but gets caught with a backbreaker. It’s off to Edge for a hard whip into the corner but D-Von manages a middle rope clothesline. The referee doesn’t see the tag to Bubba though and Christian is right back with another backbreaker.

The reverse inverted DDT plants Christian though and NOW we get the big tag off to Bubba. House is quickly cleaned, including What’s Up to Edge. It’s time for a table, which knocks Edge And Christian down, only for Rhyno to run in and Gore Bubba. Edge steals the pin at 13:21.

Rating: B-. Speaking of matches that had been done to death, I present you with the tag division from this period. As great as the three main teams were, there comes a point of GET SOMEONE ELSE ALREADY. X-Factor wasn’t much of an addition as they were out in about five minutes, leaving us with the same stuff we’ve seen for WAY too long. The action was fine as usual, but mix it up a bit.

Post match the table is set up but Spike Dudley is here to cut Rhyno off.

From NXT Takeover: Fatal Fourway.

NXT Title: Adrian Neville vs. Tyler Breeze vs. Sami Zayn vs. Tyson Kidd

Neville is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. They’re rather tentative to start with no major contact in the first minute. We pair off with Kidd hammering on Neville and Zayn fighting out of the corner to beat up Breeze. That’s broken up and it’s down to Zayn vs. Neville, which is what people seem rather interested in seeing. The other two come back in to break it up and everyone goes outside for a slugout.

Zayn stops for a quick photo with Breeze’s phone, which he throws inside. Kidd switches off and takes Zayn inside, where Zayn is right back with a Koji Clutch. Breeze breaks that up and a double suplex puts Neville down on the stage. It’s Zayn coming in to cut Kidd off, earning himself a double suplex onto the ramp. Back in and Zayn gets double teamed as we slow down a good bit. Neville tries to make the save and gets kicked outside but Kidd sends Breeze outside as the alliance is done.

Kidd keeps knocking people out to the floor before kicking Zayn in the back for two. A legdrop in the ropes gives Kidd two and Neville gets knocked off the apron as a bonus. Kidd’s running dropkick in the Tree of Woe gets two on Zayn and we hit the chinlock. Neville finally comes back in to break it up (because a chinlock needs to be broken up) but Breeze takes Neville down. Zayn is back up as Neville hits a top rope springboard moonsault to take out the villains.

Neville’s big handspring elbow is countered into…I’m not sure but it’s kind of a backdrop. Kidd catapults Zayn into Neville but can’t get Zayn in the Sharpshooter. He can however kick Zayn in the head, only for Breeze to come back in with some Supermodel Kicks for two each. Breeze takes Neville up top, with Kidd joining Breeze, meaning Zayn can come in to make it a Tower Of Doom.

Zayn gets two and then erupts on Kidd in the corner. Neville gets a boot up to stop a charging Zayn in the corner, setting up the Red Arrow. Breeze steals the cover for two and the freak out on the near fall is great. Kidd is back up with a Sharpshooter on Breeze, with Neville having to dive in to stop the tap, leaving Zayn to make the save. Zayn exploders Kidd into the corner before sending Neville over the barricade. The diving DDT takes Breeze out on the floor again and the Helluva Kick hits Kidd…but Neville pulls the referee at two. Neville takes Zayn out and the Red Arrow retains the title at 24:12.

Rating: B+. I was kind of expecting this one to be included and I’m glad that it was. This was around the time when NXT was becoming a major force and that made for some interesting matches such as this one. If nothing else, it makes me sad to see how far Tyler Breeze fell, as he should have been a much bigger deal than he was after such a great run on NXT.

From the 2019 Royal Rumble Kickoff Show.

Cruiserweight Title: Kalisto vs. Akira Tozawa vs. Hideo Itami vs. Buddy Murphy

Murphy is defending and they trade the early rollups to start. Tozawa gets a Black Widow on Murphy but Kalisto is in for a rather springboardy hurricanrana. Murphy blocks it with raw power but gets dropkicked outside by Tozawa. Back up and Murphy pulls Kalisto’s dive out of the air for a suplex onto the floor.

That leaves Itami in the ring for the showdown, with Murphy coming in to trade kicks to the back. Itami wins a slugout and stomps him down in the corner, meaning it’s time to scream a lot. Tozawa and Kalisto are back up with some dives to take Murphy down, leaving Itami as the only one standing. Kalisto is back up to catapult Tozawa onto Murphy on the floor for quite the landing.

Back in and Kalisto strikes away for two on Itami as things slow back down a bit. Tozawa and Murphy take their place with Murphy down, only for Itami to break up the top rope backsplash. Tozawa’s hurricanrana driver plants Itami and Tozawa follows with a big dive to the floor. Murphy is back up with a big running flip dive onto everyone else, followed by a nasty sitout powerbomb to Kalisto.

Tozawa makes the save but Murphy rolls through a high crossbody. That’s fine with Tozawa, who poisonranas Murphy for two, with Itami stealing the near fall. The Salida Del Sol gives Kalisto two on Itami, meaning it’s time for the four way slugout. Itami and Murphy are left standing with Murphy getting the better of things, including Murphy’s Law to retain at 12:04.

Rating: B. This was a good choice for the last match before the show started as it was about throwing a bunch of people out there and letting them go nuts. Murphy was feeling it as champion at this point as he didn’t wrestle like a cruiserweight and that made things all the better for him. Tozawa wasn’t a total goof yet either and Kalisto had some chops of his own, making this a nice mixture of talent.

From Monday Night Raw, December 1, 1997.

D’Lo Brown vs. Miguel Perez Jr. vs. Chainz vs. Recon

Elimination rules. This is from Gang Warz so there are all kinds of people at ringside. Brown hammers on Chainz to start but Chainz is back with some elbows. Recon (Bull Buchanan) comes in with a hurricanrana, which has Cornette impressed. Brown comes back in to drop Recon and it’s back to Chainz to hammer away a bit. A big boot staggers Recon and Brown punches him into Chainz’s Death Valley Driver for the pin at 2:09.

Brown comes in and gets clotheslined down so it’s off to Perez, who is knocked down just as fast. A quick rollup gives Perez the pin on Brown at 3:14 and we’re down to one on one. The Death Valley Driver connects but everyone comes in and the match is thrown out at 3:37.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of adding this? I was thinking the collection was ending with the cruiserweight match and then some angle but instead we get this tacked on mess which doesn’t even have a winner. It’s such a weird way to go and it’s not like this was anything memorable. It’s certainly out of nowhere though and that’s kind of the fun from something like this.

The big brawl ends the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was MUCH better than I was expecting, as it was one of the collections that I was dreading and it wound up being a lot of fun. The thing that makes these collections work is how much they mix things up and that’s what you got here, with some stuff from different promotions and a variety of eras. I had fun with this and it was one of the nicer surprises. It’s not my favorite format, but they made this work, even without an entry from the FATAL FOUR WAY pay per view. Even WWE forgot about that mess.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Bashed In The USA: I’d Bash It Too (Full Show Included)

Bashed In The USA
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Lord Alfred Hayes, Jim Ross, Randy Savage, Bobby Heenan
Host: Mr. Perfect

I’ve seen this tape before but it’s been such a long time that it’s worth another look now that the Vault has put it up. This is from 1993 so it’s not the greatest time in the company’s history but there should be some decent stuff in there. If nothing else, Bret and Shawn should be around to save things. Let’s get to it.

Out host is Mr. Perfect, who is looking for the perfect…stamp. Geez how bad were the ideas they rejected?

From December 14, 1992 in Green Bay, Wisconsin.

Razor Ramon vs. Big Boss Man

Ramon offers ring announcer Mike McGuirk a kiss before the match but she doesn’t seem interested. They stall a lot to start with Ramon wanting the nightstick gone (fair) and then promising to throw Boss Man out. Boss Man responds by SNAPPING THE TOOTHPICK but Ramon bails to the floor. After over two minutes of stalling, Boss Man wants to head outside as well, meaning it’s time for some stretching on the barricade.

Ramon invites Boss Man back inside so Boss Man shakes the ropes for a low blow, which I guess counts as contact? They finally lock up after over three minutes and they roll around the ropes. Ramon shoves him so Boss Man is back with a good right hand. Ramon’s headlock and shoulder don’t get him very far so Boss Man invites him to try it again.

We go to the test of strength, with Boss Man going down to a knee and Ramon kicks him in the ribs for daring to try a comeback. Boss Man fights up and hits the uppercut before elbowing him into a rollup for two. Some right hands in the corner have Ramon in more trouble but he grabs the nightstick. The big swing misses but Ramon gets a boot up in the corner. A rollup with feet on the ropes gives Ramon the cheap pin at 7:45.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t very good, as it was a bunch of stalling and then some very basic stuff. Boss Man was mostly done as a big deal at this point and wouldn’t even be around the company that much longer. Ramon on the other hand was brand new so giving him a win helped. Just maybe make it a bit better on the way there next time.

Mr. Perfect doesn’t think much of Ramon and we see a clip from Survivor Series 1992 of Perfect cleaning house with a chair.

From June 3, 1992 in Cornwall, Ontario, Canada.

Rick Martel/Money Inc. vs. Tatanka/High Energy

Jimmy Hart is here with Martel and company. Owen armdrags DiBiase down to start as commentary buries someone named Marty Applebaum, who apparently works for Coliseum Video. This isn’t the first time they’ve mocked him so we have a running joke, and it’s a long run as well as this goes on for a good while. DiBiase armdrags Owen right back and mocks him a bit but gets dropkicked, with everything breaking down and the villains getting cleaned out.

Back in and Martel turns his back on Owen, who brings Tatanka in to take him apart. The middle rope chop to the head sends Martel to the floor and it’s off to Ware for a dropkick to IRS. Monsoon buries him too by saying Ware has put on about 25lbs. A shot from behind puts Ware down but he’s up and over to Tatanka for the tag. DiBiase gets a boot up in the corner, though commentary would rather talk about French fries. Martel comes in for kicking and choking and it’s back to IRS with a middle rope fist to the head.

DiBiase gets in a snapmare into a chinlock as Hayes talks about which partner Tatanka should tag (he picks Hart). Tatanka fights up for a sunset flip but gets caught in the front facelock. Naturally he gets over to Ware but the referee doesn’t see the tag, meaning IRS can choke in the corner (Hayes approves, like the evil Englishman he is). Tatanka finally suplexes his way to freedom and the tag brings in Hart to clean hammer away. Everything breaks down and DiBiase trips Ware, who gets pinned by IRS at 12:13, despite neither of them being legal (which Monsoon does point out).

Rating: C. This was long and fairly dull, but I can go for a six man where they get some people out there and let them do their thing for a bit. Martel and Tatanka were in the middle of a fairly dull feud but at least the other match was fairly fresh. The ending left a good bit to be desired though, as it wasn’t hard to keep track of who was legal. Unless you’re a Hebner, but why would you ever trust one of them?

Mr. Perfect finally gets some help with the stamp and throws us to a profile on Shawn Michaels. The store employee not even turning her head when Perfect stops to talk to the camera is rather funny.

Shawn Michaels can’t believe he was asked to get his amazing career down to three matches but he’s the Wrestler of the 90s so it’s easy enough.

From January 26, 1993 in Fresno, California.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Kamala

Michaels is defending and Slick is here with Kamala. Some belly slapping has Michaels dodging as there are A LOT of empty seats opposite the camera. Michaels slides between the legs as we’re still waiting on the first contact. The offer of a handshake lets Michaels get in a right hand but a whip out of the corner gets him nowhere. Instead Kamala chops him out to the floor and takes a quick lap, with Slick telling him to stay in the ring, which Hayes DOES NOT like.

Back in and Michaels’ cheap shot doesn’t work so Kamala grabs a bearhug into a choke. That’s broken up and Michaels gets in a shot off the top for a knockdown. Kamala is right back with a superkick and the chops before just dumping him over the top. Michaels throws Slick down and just walks out, with Kamala following for the double countout at 4:30.

Rating: C-. They didn’t have much time here and it wasn’t exactly worth seeing. Michaels was an all time in-ring star but there is only so much that even he can do in a four minute match against Kamala with so much of the time being wasted. As usual, I don’t get the point in having matches in a profile go like this but that’s the Coliseum Video way.

Post match Kamala drags Michaels back to the ring and gives him a splash.

Michaels mocks Kamala and is ready for his next match, even if it’s against an odd opponent.

From December 14, 1992 in Green Bay, Wisconsin.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Skinner

Michaels is defending again in a rare heel vs. heel match. We get a slow start as Michaels has to take his entrance gear off, with Skinner sending him straight into the corner. A slam drops Michaels and a heck of a right hand puts him on the floor. Back in and Skinner knocks him down again, followed by a swinging neckbreaker.

Commentary tries to figure out if Skinner would rather have the title or Michaels stuffed on his mantle. A shoulder breaker gets two and they go outside, where Skinner misses a charge into the post. Back in and Michaels tries to jump over him but gets punched in the face. Some hard headbutts and a faceplant have Michaels in more trouble. Skinner throws him over the top but Michaels slides back in for the superkick to retain at 4:40.

Rating: C+. Skinner was oddly impressive as a de facto face here, as he beat Michaels up until a quick ending. This was better than I was expecting, even with the heel vs. heel setup. I’m not sure how far Skinner could have gone, but he was shockingly good in this kind of a role.

Michaels says it’s time to face off against a real human being.

From October 28, 1992 in Louisville, Kentucky.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Virgil

Michaels is defending and takes him down without much trouble as Heenan worries about Michaels chewing gun during the match. Some slaps to the back of the head annoy Virgil so much that he hits a dropkick for two. That’s cut off in a hurry and Michaels knocks him down again, setting up a quick chinlock.

Virgil gets back up so Michaels drops him with a clothesline, followed by a not great looking suplex. Michaels charges into a boot in the corner and gets clotheslined in the back of his head, allowing Virgil to start the snap jabs. A middle rope clothesline gives Virgil two but he misses a knee in the corner. The teardrop suplex retains the title at 7:10.

Rating: C. I know Virgil had a bit of a following around this time but my goodness he’s just so generic. There’s nothing to him that makes him stand out in any way and his big move here was a middle rope clothesline. Michaels never felt in danger and it was nice to see him get a win, but it would have been better with a higher level opponent.

Michaels brags about his success and goes to answer the door because his chicks are here.

Mr. Perfect knows a lot about stamps.

From May 18, 1992 in Cincinnati, Ohio.

Battle Royal

Shawn Michaels, Bret Hart, Sgt. Slaughter, Tatanka, El Matador, Virgil, Texas Tornado, Barry Horowitz, Jim Powers, Repo Man, Kato, Skinner, Dale Wolfe, Brooklyn Brawler, Brian Costello, Reno Riggins, Barry Hardy, Duane Gill, Chuck Casey, Tom Stone, Crush, Colonel Mustafa, Burt Spears, George Anderson, Ron Cumberledge, Mark Spears, Ted DiBiase, IRS, Jerry Sags, Brian Knobbs, Beau Beverly, Blake Beverly, Hawk, Animal, Owen Hart, Koko B. Ware, Earthquake, Typhoon

I missed some of the jobbers’ names and I can’t imagine that matters whatsoever. They start fairly slowly as there is only so much room to maneuver out there right now. A bunch of people get together to doss Earthquake and Typhoon early on, which does at least give us some extra room. Naturally Hart and Michaels get into it, as they are eternally required to do. Cumberledge is out (Savage: “I was going to say the unknown soldier.”) and another jobber who isn’t worthy of commentary’s attention is out too.

Someone else (“Another young man.”) is tossed and Hawk actually goes up for some right hands, because he’s not all there. You can see a lot of people just standing around waiting on something to do because there is only so much room and stuff going on. Hawk and Sags are both knocked out and brawl on the floor before their partners are out as well. The ring is slowly starting to clear out but there are still a bunch of people.

Two more jobbers are out and at least now there is something of a space in the middle where some action can take place. More jobbers, Repo Man and Tornado are out and it’s time for some people to rake backs. Crush goes after both Beverlys as Michaels and Hart go out at the same time. Mustafa tosses Horowitz and IRS gets rid of Slaughter. Powers is out and the bizarre team of DiBiase and Kato get rid of Crush.

Brawler is out too and Tatanka gently puts Mustafa out. Ware is backdropped out (thank goodness he’s wearing parachute pants) and Stone is out (as he was somehow still in). Kato, DiBiase and Virgil (the last two together) are out in a row. Stone is out again (ok then) and we’re down to Tatanka, Blake, Beau and IRS. Tatanka tries to fight all of them but IRS dumps Beau. Tatanka gets rid of IRS and then chops Blake out for the win at 13:17.

Rating: C-. Pretty bleh battle royal here but they ran this forty man version all over the place. It’s still cool to see as it has a lot of the midcard, plus a wide variety of jobbers. There’s nothing in the way of action though and nothing was really built up, save for maybe the Beverlys hanging in there. Nothing much to see here, but the concept is cool.

Perfect rips up a $2 million stamp because it’s not in perfect condition.

Bret Hart does a lot of art. This is pretty well known and he’s rather talented. He draws (mainly in caricature/cartoon style) the Undertaker, Paul Bearer, Yokozuna, Mr. Fuji, Money Inc. and Hulk Hogan while talking about how everyone has a gift. Nice little feature here.

From June 1, 1992 in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada.

Intercontinental Title: Rick Martel vs. Bret Hart

Hart is defending. Believe it or not they go technical to start, with neither being able to get an advantage. The headlock takeover into the headscissors sequence doesn’t go anywhere so Martel cartwheels away. Hart goes for the arm but Martel cartwheels away again, only to get clotheslined outside by an apparent gymnastics hater.

Back in and Martel gets in a few shots of his own to take over, only to miss a charge into the post. Hart works on the arm and gets two off a backslide before going back to the arm, as he is known to do. Martel gets out, misses an elbow, and gets armbarred again. That’s broken up as well and Martel knocks him down but the chinlock doesn’t last long. A sunset flip gives Hart two but Martel gives him a gutwrench suplex.

Another suplexes is broken up so Hart hits an atomic drop (you know the funny sell is included) and follows up with a clothesline. The Russian legsweep gets two but the referee gets bumped, allowing Martel to use the atomizer. The Boston crab goes on but here is Shawn Michaels to deck Hart for the DQ at 10:13.

Rating: C+. The ending actually makes sense, as Michaels was mildly obsessed with the idea of taking the title from Hart. Therefore, he didn’t want Martel to take the title, even if it meant screwing over a fellow heel. At the same time, this sets up Michaels vs. Martel in their bizarrely interesting No Punches To The Face match at Summerslam.

From June 30, 1992 in Binghamton, New York.

Beverly Brothers vs. Natural Disasters

The Genius is here with the Brothers. The Brothers jump them to start but the Disasters actually do a do-see-do to avoid a crash into each other. Stereo splashes in the corner crush the Brothers and Earthquake splashes Typhoon into them. Earthquake and Blake fight to the floor but the distraction lets Beau hit Typhoon with Genius’ scroll.

A double clothesline out of the corner gets Typhoon out of trouble but Beau manages to snapmare him down. The chinlock doesn’t last long and it’s off to Earthquake to clean house. The powerslam and elbow get two on Blake, with Beau making the save. Everything breaks down and Typhoon beats up the Genius, leaving Earthquake to get double teamed on the floor. Beau dives back in to beat the count at 7:13.

Rating: D+. This is one of those matches that isn’t interesting or important and then they have a bad finish on top of it. The Beverly Brothers were as mediocre of a team as you could get and they’re beating the Natural Disasters? I’m not sure I get this one but that is how Coliseum Video matches tended to go.

Mr. Perfect is still not pleased with the stamp selection but throws us to our main event.

From March 8, 1993 in San Antonio, Texas.

Undertaker vs. Yokozuna

Paul Bearer and Yokozuna are here too. They stare each other down for a good while before Yokozuna’s right hands don’t do much. Instead Undertaker hits a running DDT but a clothesline puts him on the floor. Undertaker goes after Fuji but gets sent into the steps for his efforts. Back in and Yokozuna crushes him in the corner before dropping the big leg. The belly to belly suplex gets two so Yokozuna gets the salt bucket for the DQ at 4:08.

Rating: D-. What in the world was that? They stalled a lot at the beginning and then the match itself barely breaks four minutes. I have no idea what they were thinking here as it’s more a match that annoys the fans than anything else. If you don’t want either of them taking a pin, just don’t put the match together in the first place.

Post match the beatdown is on but the Banzai Drop misses. Undertaker fights back and Yokozuna walks away.

Perfect shows his perfect stamp and it’s…a picture of him. Well of course it is.

Overall Rating: D+. I for one am shocked that the best matches on a tape from 1993 involved Bret and Shawn. What I am rather shocked about though is the fact that Skinner had the match of the tape for a good stretch. This was a pretty rough collection with absolutely nothing worth seeing. It’s definitely not a great era for the company and if this is the best they could offer, you could see why.

 

 

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