Bunkhouse Battle Royal
Date: January 1, 1987
Location: Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Buddy Roberts, Michael Hayes, Terry Gordy, Ken Massey, Leroy Brown, Rick Steiner, Sting, Angel of Death, One Man Gang, Chavo Guerrero, Eddie Gilbert, Iceman Parsons, Jack Victory, Steve Williams, Ted DiBiase, Bill Irwin, Bobby Perez, Eli the Eliminator, Gary Young, Jeff Raitz, Jim Duggan, Terry Taylor
Dark match from a UWF TV taping and everyone is in street clothes. You’re eliminated by being tossed or bleeding here to make things a little more violent. The camera stays a good bit too close to start and you can’t see a lot of the ring. Throw in the lack of commentary and this is likely to wind up being very confusing. The brawling by the ropes begins and some people are sent outside through the ropes, meaning they can come back in.
Williams and Gordy brawl through the ropes and out to the floor as Massey is eliminated. We ignore the match to watch the two of them fight and they are eliminated as well. Makes enough sense. Victory is out but comes back in. Ring announcer: “Jack Victory is eliminated! Pardon me, he’s ok.” The brawling continues and since they are in street clothes, it is even more difficult to keep track of the people involved. Angel, Victory and Parsons are all out in a row to clear the ring out a bit.
Gilbert is bleeding for an elimination, even if it is off camera. Sting, Guerrero and Raitz are all out in a row. Hayes beats on Gang with his cowboy boot and Perez is out. Stiner is out and Gang starts hitting people with the boot. A bunch of people fight on the floor Eli, Brown and Irwin are all out, plus Taylor and Duggan. There goes Gang, leaving Hayes and Roberts to beat on DiBiase with a belt. Young is out and DiBiase makes the comeback by eliminating Roberts and then Hayes in a row to win at 10:38.
Rating: D. Aside from it being weird enough to see DiBiase as a face, the problem here was how fast people were being put out. The camera stayed far too zoomed in a lot of the time and I barely saw a lot of the people being eliminated. Just not a well put together match, but it was much more for the live crowd in the first place anyway.
UWF Championship Wrestling – October 25, 1986: Fantastic(s) Is Right
Universal Wrestling Federation Championship Wrestling Date: October 25, 1986
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Jim Ross, Terry Taylor
It’s the second of two shows I’m looking at from this promotion in this era and that is kind of appealing. The first show was from about four months later so I’m not sure what to expect from this one. The promotion tends to be a pretty entertaining one so hopefully that continues to be the case here. Let’s get to it.
We open with a clip from last week with Devastation Inc. (Skandor Akbar’s group) in a brawl with a bunch of wrestlers.
JR and Terry Taylor welcome us to the show and run down the card, including three title matches and a bunch of recaps.
TV Title: Ken Massey vs. Buddy Jack Roberts
Roberts is defending and JR makes it clear that Massey isn’t very good. Feeling out process to start until Roberts takes him down and ties up the leg. The middle rope elbow misses but Roberts is right back with a neckbreaker into a bulldog to retain at 2:36. Just a squash.
Commentary talks about Savannah Jack being thrown out of Devastation Inc. and we see him being fired last week. This might have been over Jack being African American so the beatdown was on but Jack cleared the ring of Skandor Akbar, One Man Gang and Leroy Brown.
Akbar says he isn’t letting this go and promises to make Jack shine his shoes after everything is over. He doesn’t like these Americans with their backbones.
We look at Terry Taylor and Ted DiBiase beating the Freebirds in a country whipping (street fight) match last week. The Freebirds mauled them after the match, even stealing DiBiase’s famous loaded black glove to knock DiBiase out. JR is in full on Attitude Era mode here with the shouting and emotion and it’s rather awesome.
DiBiase, with a bandage on his head, is of these Freebirds busting him open over and over. Now they stole his glove and he is getting it back. So the good guy is mad that the villains stole his loaded glove. That’s an odd line of thinking.
The Fantastics are ready to defend their Tag Team Titles against anyone, including John Tatum and Jack Victory.
Jeff Raitz/Joe Savoldi vs. One Man Gang/Leroy Brown
Skandor Akbar is with the Gang and Brown. Savoldi can’t circle around the huge Gang, who pounds him into the corner without much effort. Brown comes in for the choke to Savoldi and some pounding to Raitz. Gang and Brown drop back to back elbows for the easy win at 2:00.
Michael Hayes has replaced Terry Taylor, much to JR’s annoyance.
We go to a video with JR talking to Bill Apter of Pro Wrestling Illustrated. The magazine is hosting a tournament starting on Halloween night for a cup and $50,000, so a bunch of wrestlers are already trying to get in.
Here’s the UWF Top Ten:
10. Chris Adams
9. Missing Link
8. Chavo Guerrero
7. Michael Hayes
6. Terry Taylor
5. Jim Duggan
4. One Man Gang
3. Ted DiBiase
2. Steve Williams
1. Buddy Roberts
And the UWF Champion is Terry Gordy.
Iceman King Parsons vs. Gustavo Mendoza
Hayes says the UWF is a very organized organization. Parsons hammers away to start and hits Mendoza in the head a few times, setting up a running knee. The hip attack sets up a splash to finish Mendoza at 1:35. Well that was quick.
Chris Adams isn’t happy with his situation involving the World Title. He’s coming for Terry Gordy and doesn’t care where he has to go to get it.
Tag Team Titles: Fantastics vs. John Tatum/Jack Victory
Tatum and Victory, with Missy Hyatt, are challenging. It takes the Fantastics a long time to get to the ring as they are rather popular with the fans. Bobby Fulton armdrags Victory to start and then does the same to Tatum, who complains about a hair pull. No one else seemed to notice it so Fulton monkey flips and dropkicks him. A double dropkick puts Tatum on the floor and a double backdrop does the same to Victory as the champs start fast.
Tommy Rogers comes in to slug away at Tatum and it’s back to Fulton, who gets caught in an armbar. That earns Tatum a headscissors and the champs clear the ring as we take a break. Back with Fulton being sent into the post, allowing Victory to drop him onto the barricade. Victory posts him again and it’s time to work on the arm.
Something close to a low blow has Fulton in more trouble and Tatum cuts the ring off to block the hot tag attempt. Fulton manages a knee lift though and there’s the hot tag to Rogers to clean house. Everything breaks down as Eddie Gilbert has come down with flowers for Missy. Tatum is distracted by Missy leaving ringside and gets rolled up to retain the titles at 12:50.
Rating: C+. The Fantastics are my favorite NWA/non-WWF 80s tag team so it’s fun to see these guys getting some time in a hot match. The angle was what mattered here though as Missy has someone new and the Fantastics just happened to be there. Tatum and Victory were fine for a heel team and I was thinking the titles might change hands here so well done with setting everything up.
Missy goes to leave with Gilbert but throws him back inside for the big beatdown. Gilbert’s friends Sting and Rick Steiner come in for the save and beat down Tatum and Victory. Missy even gets in a shot with the loaded Gucci bag (I love wrestling) to bust Tatum open (the slow motion replay makes it look even better). Tatum and Victory would win the titles before the month was over.
And now, with a little over a minute to go, it’s time for the UWF Title match with Jim Duggan challenging Terry Gordy. The credits roll over the entrances and we’re promised the outcome next week. See how much better that is than having everything wrapped up to end the show?
Overall Rating: C+. Good show here and I could go for some more of this stuff. I know the company was on its very last legs here but you could see what Bill Watts could do with the right resources. The energy was there and you could tell that it was set up to make fans watch next week, which is kind of the point. The ending alone made me curious about where things were going, which you just do not see today. Very efficient use of an hour, and it was an absolute breeze to watch.
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UWF Power Pro Wrestling – February 7, 1987: Tournament Prep
Power Pro Wrestling Date: February 7, 1987
Location: Cowtown Coliseum, Fort Worth, Texas
Commentators: Jim Ross, Michael Hayes
Someone wanted me to look at some Universal Wrestling Federation shows so here we go. This is the evolved form of Mid-South, though things are not exactly looking great by this point. I’m not sure how well this is going to go, but it is a promotion I haven’t looked at very much before. Let’s get to it.
Bill Watts (boss) is in his office to announce a one night tournament for the vacant Tag Team Titles. We hear four of the eight teams but don’t see any brackets. Not that it matters as the tournament is taking place at an event later tonight.
JR and Hayes run down the card and Hayes is excited about winning the Tag Team Titles.
Mike Reed vs. Angel of Death
Angel (very bald and with Sunshine in his corner) was a candidate for the Black Scorpion in WCW a few years later. A slam puts Reed down and a splash gives Angel two. Reed gets tossed around and there’s a running clothesline to drop him again. A suplex sets up a Samoan drop to finish Reed at 2:02. Rather effective squash.
Chavo Guerrero and Missing Link are ready to win the Tag Team Titles.
We look at the end of last week’s Badstreet Match (street fight) with the Freebirds beating up Steve Williams and Ted DiBiase. Devastation Inc. came in to help the Freebirds until a bunch of wrestlers came out to chase them off.
Hayes rants about how the Freebirds always keep things even.
Eli and Wild Bill Irwin are ready for Ted DiBiase and Steve Williams in the tournament. A young Bruce Prichard is the interviewer here.
Buddy Roberts thinks someone beat the Missing Link over the head with an ugly stick. Sunshine tells Dark Journey to stay out of the way tonight.
Ted DiBiase is ready to take out One Man Gang to become UWF Champion, just like he beat him before. It is so bizarre to hear DiBiase as a face.
Super Ninja vs. Bobby Walker
Both of them are debuting, that isn’t Hard Work Bobby Walker of (very minor) WCW fame and Bruce Prichard takes Hayes’ place on commentary. Ninja headlocks him down and then kicks him in the face, followed by a toss to the floor. Back in and Ninja stomps away with a gutwrench suplex taking Walker down again. A superkick finishes Walker at 4:24.
Rating: D+. Pretty dull squash here as Ninja wasn’t doing anything more than the bare basics. Walker was as lame of a jobber as you could get, so I can’t say I’m overly surprised. Ninja wrestled in the AWA as Mr. Go. I remember seeing him challenge the Midnight Rockers for the Tag Team Titles with a partner named…..the Super Ninja. That’s 80s wrestling for you.
Ninja drops Walker again post match, which has JR talking about his “sadistic Oriental side.”
Ted DiBiase and Steve Williams are ready to win the Tag Team Titles because they’ve been champions before.
Jeff Gaylord vs. Ted DiBiase
Gaylord is a good sized guy who was one of the Knights at Survivor Series 1993. This is face vs. face so they go technical to start with a fight over a top wristlock. DiBiase’s armbar sends Gaylord to the rope so he grabs a headlock takeover instead. Back up and another headlock takeover has Gaylord down as we hear about how he has no chance here. It works so well that DiBiase does it for a third time, which works yet again.
They get up for a third time and seem to mistime something, as DiBiase swings a wild elbow to knock him down. Gaylord pops back up and DiBiase misses a similar elbow and gets slammed for two this time. A backslide doesn’t work for DiBiase so he grabs a small package for the pin at 5:07 instead.
Rating: C-. I can see why the WWF went after DiBiase so hard as he looked great, could talk and had the technical skills. The problem is that he doesn’t seem to have much of a character, so throwing in one of the best ideas ever helped quite a bit. Gaylord was big for a technical guy and did fine, but there is a limit to how far you can go against someone as smooth as DiBiase.
Respect is shown post match.
Missing Link vs. Buddy Jack Roberts
Roberts has the rest of the Freebird Family, meaning Michael Hayes, Angel of Death, Terry Gordy and Sunshine. Link just has Dark Journey so this isn’t quite the balanced fight. And never mind as the Family jump him before the bell and the big beatdown is on. Ted DiBiase, Chavo Guerrero (Link’s partner in the tournament) and Steve Williams make the save. Link was busted open in the process.
Post break, we get a shortened version of the “fifteen minutes of action” during the break, with Guerrero/DiBiase/Williams saying they are sick and tired of the Freebirds. The challenge is on but matchmaker Grizzly Smith comes out to say no. DiBiase and company aren’t leaving though so Smith goes to the back to figure something out. We’re clipped to the Freebird Family slowly coming out and Sunshine trying to place peacekeeper. Granted that involves calling Chavo a chihuahua so it might not be so effective. DiBiase promises to keep the numbers even and that’s about it.
Eli vs. Chavo Guerrero
Eli has Wild Bill Irwin with him and was a territory guy in the 80s with a little time in Japan. Chavo hammers away so fast to start that I almost miss DiBiase there too. Granted DiBiase and Irwin getting into the ring to brawl at the same time makes it a little more obvious. Chavo and Eli fight to the floor as DiBiase grabs the whip to clear the ring. Another referee comes out and disqualifies Eli, though the bell never actually rang.
The Freebird Family talks about having the best odds to win the Tag Team Titles, mainly because they have two teams included. Hayes: “If it comes down to us, which it probably will, you take one belt and we’ll take one.”
Dark Journey says Chavo Guerrero and Missing Link are ready for Sting and Rick Steiner. Chavo starts in English and switches to Spanish while promising to win the belts.
JR and Bruce Prichard give their tournament picks (one of the Freebird teams/DiBiase and Williams). The matches begin on TV next week.
We get a music video of general highlights to wrap up the show.
Overall Rating: C. I can see why the show is so well received, though at the same time you can see that things have fallen a very long way by this point. The energy wasn’t there, even though a lot of the talent was. The company would be sold to Jim Crockett in about two months so it isn’t like there was much left to see from these guys. This wasn’t bad, but the company has done better stuff before. In case you were wondering: Terry Taylor and Chris Adams, who weren’t even on the show, won the titles.
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UWF Blackjack Brawl: This Shouldn’t Happen In America
Blackjack Brawl Date: September 23, 1994 Location: MGM Grand Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada Attendance: 900 Commentators: John Tolos, Carlo Gianelli
So a few months ago I looked at the UWF’s Beach Brawl, which was a special event from one of the more infamously lame promotions: Herb Abrams’ Universal Wrestling Federation. Now it’s time to look at the followup, which is over three years later and not on pay per view. It’s an eleven match card and nine are title matches, with five of those being to crown inaugural champions. This is going to be a really, really long night. Let’s get to it.
Opening sequence, with the rather over the top introduction from Abrams and some clips from a press conference.
Abrams is in the ring to shout an introduction, with commentary talking over him. He brings Blackjack Mulligan to the ring to hype up the show and promises a lot of big stuff tonight.
Commentary welcomes us to the show.
We have a celebrity guest ring announcer with Steve Rossi (apparently he was on the Howard Stern Show at least once). After some audio issues, he introduces the Nevada Athletic Commission and brings out Dan Spivey. Rossi: “He’ll show you some wrestling tonight.”
Americas Championship: Dan Spivey vs. Johnny Ace
For the inaugural title (which is not mentioned until a few minutes into the match) and Ace has Missy Hyatt with him. Rossi has to beg the fans to cheer during the introductions and I think you know how this night is going to go. It doesn’t help that the arena (holds about 17,000) is embarrassingly empty. Commentary: “Who cares about these wrestlers when you have Missy Hyatt?”
Ace rolls him up for two and Spivey bails to the apron. Back n and Spivey hammers away, only for Ace to come back with a middle rope crossbody. A dropkick puts Spivey on the floor where he kicks a few things around. Back in and Ace stomps away (Tolos: “That would kill a normal man!”) before grabbing a chinlock. Spivey suplexes his way to freedom as I try to figure out who I’m supposed to cheer for here. A backbreaker gives Spivey two and a Russian legsweep gets the same.
Ace is back up with a top rope clothesline for two but Spivey grabs a DDT for three. Well I mean the referee slapped the mat three times but calls it two anyway, as I guess counting doesn’t work around here either. We look at Missy Hyatt for a second and come back with Spivey hitting what looked like a Boss Man Slam. The abdominal stretch goes on before Spivey slams him back down for two off a legdrop. Spivey grabs it again and Hyatt turns on Ace by throwing in the towel to give Spivey the win and the title at 7:18.
Rating: D. Just think for a second: of the eleven match card that they have planned, THIS is what they felt was the best way to get things going. I’ve said this already but it bears repeating: we are in for a really, really long night. Vince Russo unnecessary screwy finish aside, the match was rather lame as they were just doing moves to each other with no story, build, flow or anything. But at least the manager turned on Ace during their first time together so….development?
Post match Spivey grabs Abrams until Ace chases him off. Abrams yells at Spivey (Abrams: “You’re a double cheating cross!”), who leaves with Hyatt.
We go to a break, with commentary being heard talking to production, just in case you thought this could be competent for more than three seconds.
Post break, commentary cuts out, then Ginaelli slips up by saying Ace won the match.
We talk about the Junior Heavyweight title, featuring Mando “Gareo”. They’ll be right “black” after this break.
Junior Heavyweight Title: Mando Guerrero vs. Jack Armstrong
For the inaugural title and at least Rossi gets Guerrero’s (who comes out to an actual WEIRD AL song) name right. Jack (called Wildman in the graphic and Wildcat during his introductions) looks great and has been wrestling for….THIRTY ONE YEARS??? Granted this is his first match in about four years but when you debut in 1963 and are still wrestling in 1994, I’m a good bit impressed. Odds are that’s going to be the only impressive thing here but still not bad. Gianelli still can’t pronounce Guerrero as he sits on the corner while Armstrong poses.
They run the ropes to start and Mando dropkicks him out to the floor. Back in and Mando grabs an armdrag into an armbar but they’re right back to the floor to get the brawling going. Mando knocks him into the barricade and hits an Asai moonsault, sending Tolos into as close to shock as you’re getting around here. Back in and Mando gets two off a spinebuster as we’re told that this is the first of three Blackjack Brawls planned. Uh, yeah. Anyway Mando misses a moonsault and Jack drops two elbows for the pin and the title at 4:41.
Rating: D+. Well it was better than the previous one, but again it is very clear that they are not putting even the slightest bit of thought into all of these title matches. There was no mention of the title here and Mando dominated until the end when Armstrong picked up the fluke win. Armstrong had a good physique but this was the last match of his career.
Post match, Abrams gets in the ring to say he isn’t pleased with the winner, but at least Armstrong got busted open a bit.
Dr. Feelgood says he’ll win.
SportsChannel Television Title: Dr. Feelgood vs. Sunny Beach
For the vacant title and Missy Hyatt is here with Feelgood. There’s even a theme here as Feelgood has a doctor’s bag and Missy has a stethoscope. Beach takes him down by the arm to start and then armdrags him into an armbar to mix it up a bit. They switch it to a chinlock for a bit before Feelgood is back with some back rakes. Missy gets in a shoe shot to the head, sending Tolos into a speech about how gorgeous she is.
Beach comes back with some right hands and a sunset flip for two, only to get clotheslined down. A backbreaker gives Feelgood two and he plants Beach with a DDT (which commentary describes as “another great professional wrestling move”). Hold on though as Feelgood goes to his medical bag and pulls out a rag. He pours some liquid onto the rag, only to have Beach shove it into his face for the win at 5:27. The referee watched EVERY BIT OF THIS and doesn’t seem to mind. Can you really blame him?
Rating: F. Sweet goodness it’s actually getting worse. What are you supposed to do when the referee just lets the doctor use I’m guessing ether on the surfer? The match is a failure for the refereeing alone and I’m almost scared to see how bad this show gets as we keep going. Terrible match with an even worse ending.
Post match Feelgood takes Beach down with the rag as Missy screams a lot. Blackjack Mulligan comes in to yell, with Feelgood calling him various cowboy insults.
BUY MERCH! That has to be some kind of a collector’s item. Sid walks in and says something about Nolan Ryan signed baseballs.
Herb Abrams talks about Commissioner Bruno Sammartino….who isn’t here tonight! Abrams has Blackjack Mulligan talk about what else is coming tonight. Mulligan: “These other promotions won’t even touch these guys!” Steve Williams would destroy Hulk Hogan, Ric Flair and Bret Hart!
Southern States Title: Bob Orton Jr. vs. Finland Hellraiser Thor
Believe it or not, Orton actually is the champion coming in and Thor is better known as Ludvig Borga. Orton grabs a headlock to start but gets shoved away by raw power. More power sends Orton into the corner and this time Thor hammers away with shots to the ribs. There’s a side slam to plant Orton again and we hit the chinlock with a knee in the back. Commentary uses the time to discuss who really discovered America as Orton comes back with some shots to the face. Thor backdrops him over the top to counter a piledriver attempt and they fight on the floor for the double DQ at 5:29.
Rating: D. And somehow, that’s in the running for the best match of the night, just due to the people involved if nothing else. Thor is fresh off his time with the WWF and it isn’t a good sign when he is looking like a knockoff version of himself. Orton was pretty far past his prime already but his own talent is enough to carry him pretty far. Not far enough to save this show, but at least they picked things up a tiny bit over the previous match.
They brawl even more post match, showing more fire than anything else on the show. Thor bails and Orton’s eye is busted open, so the ring announcer asks the fans to cheer for him about five times. Orton goes on a rant about how he fights like an American, with all of the values that are falling apart every day.
Midget World Title: Karate Kid vs. Little Tokyo
For the inaugural title and this is FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. The ring announcer is practically begging the fans to cheer for this as things are falling apart before the bell. Tokyo bails from the threat of Kid’s kicks and shoulders him down. A hiptoss drops Tokyo, who glares out of the corner. The armbar doesn’t last long on Kid as the referee yells at Tokyo again. The crisscross is on, with Kid stopping so Tokyo runs around on his own. After the annoyance is over, Tokyo’s armbar doesn’t work all over again. They fight over a test of strength on the mat, allowing Tokyo to yell at the referee some more.
It’s time to dance a bit until Kid gets a quick one. Hold on though as Tokyo yells at the referee AGAIN, followed by a poke to Kid’s eyes. Kid is fine enough to slap on a full nelson, with Tokyo climbing the ropes for the break, only to be dropped straight down for a slight chuckle. Tokyo avoids a dropkick though and Kid….runs into him, allowing Tokyo to get the pin and the title at 7:36.
Rating: D. Yes they gave this the most time of anything so far tonight and while it could have been worse, this was almost the cherry on the sundae of horrible ideas. This felt like it belonged in 1984 or so, and given how many things that could apply to on this show, it seems that things are kind of going badly around here. In other words, this is reaching torture levels all over again.
Post match Abrams and Tokyo have a language barrier. How many times do we need to see him and his yellow coat tonight???
Here’s the same merchandise ad from before the previous match.
Sid says….something that audio doesn’t pick up for the most part but it sounds like he’s coming for Steve Williams and the World Title.
Samson vs. Irish Assassin
They’re both in good shape and Samson is replacing Hercules. This is billed as a REVENGE match, though they don’t actually explain what the revenge is for. They have the lamest lockup I can remember in a long time and Samson’s running shoulder bounces off of the Assassin. A running clothesline in the corner hits Samson as commentary recaps Little Tokyo winning the title. Samson avoids an elbow as Tolos talks about making Gianelli a better commentator. A slam and a suplex give Samson the pin at 4:45.
Rating: F. Sweet goodness man. I don’t remember the last time I saw a show this….lifeless. When you consider that I can’t find anything about Samson and Assassin was a nothing name, I’m not sure why in the world I’m supposed to care about revenge, when THEY DIDN’T SAY WHY THESE TWO ARE FIGHTING. The company isn’t running anything else at the moment, so how many places could they set up something like this? I’m being more and more dumbfounded by this show every match and it wasn’t a high bar to start things off.
CALL THE HOTLINE!
Steve Ray thinks Tyler Mane is tall but he doesn’t have any heart.
MGM Grand Title: Steve Ray vs. Tyler Mane
For the inaugural title. Mane dabbled in WCW for a bit but is far more famous as Sabretooth in the first series of X-Men movies. Granted the pelt with a lion’s head over his stomach is rather noteworthy in its own right. Ray is the Wild Thing and seems to be something like a rock star/Lionheart Chris Jericho type. After Ray makes sure his jacket is taken care of, we’re ready to go with commentary comparing Mane to Big John Studd. An armdrag and clothesline put Mane on the floor but he’s back in to slam his way out of a crossbody attempt.
Ray is fine enough to start in on the leg and the cranking ensues. We pause for a second so the referee can check on the knee, allowing Mane to get in a cheap shot and take over. A chokeslam (not named because….it’s such a complicated concept I guess) plants Ray but he’s back back with a grab of the leg. Mane low bridges him to the floor so Ray tries a sunset flip, only to have Mane sit down on it while grabbing the rope (again, right in front of the referee) for the pin and the title at 6:26.
Rating: D. Again, it says a lot when this is the kind of match that is near the high point of the show. It was a big man vs. small man match with Ray trying to have some energy but not being able to deal with the power. Now that being said, the horrible refereeing at the end hurt it a lot, and it’s not like this show has any benefit of the doubt. Another bad match on the show, which is completely beyond saving in case that wasn’t clear yet.
Post match Abrams presents Mane with the title. Mane, who is taller than Mulligan, says the fat lady just sung on Ray. True actually, as this was his last match for both guys.
Women’s Title: Candy Divine vs. Tina Moretti
For the vacant title and Moretti is better known as Ivory. The pre-match gaffe is on the announcer, as he introduces Divine (yes DIVINE, which is not the hardest word to read, pronounce, spell or understand) as Candy Devian. That’s another level of bad and as a result it fits in perfectly here. Even commentary blasts him for that screwup. Divine popped up in various promotions and was one of the bigger names of her time for outside the WWF. Moretti is billed from Italy, which is rather odd after listening to Ivory for years.
Commentary is all about how the women look as Divine is dropkicked to the floor to start but they switch places in a hurry. Back in and Divine works on an armbar but gets rolled up for a fast two. Divine fights up and chokes in the corner, which Tolos calls a good wrestling move. Moretti gets slammed out of the corner and Divine gets the pin and the title at 3:11.
Rating: D-. I’m not sure what happened there but it was an abrupt ending to an already bad match. Women’s wrestling was absolutely nothing in America at this point so you can’t get too annoyed. Also given how bad some of the things on this show have been, a three minute match is hard to get annoyed over. Take that for what you will.
Post match, the announcer says Devian for the fifth time.
Steve Williams is standing in front of a cutout of himself and says he respects Sid Vicious. He can’t get Hulk Hogan or Ric Flair on the phone but he’ll face Sid tonight. Really not the image you want to present but that’s the least of their problems.
Tag Team Titles: Killer Bees vs. The New Powers Of Pain
For the inaugural titles and that would be Warlord/Power Warrior, the latter being a guy who didn’t do much in his career. Announcer: “And we have a battle royal coming up.” No, we don’t, thank goodness. Blair (who apparently has a great gym) starts with Warrior, who shoves him away without much effort. An armbar has no effect on Warrior and Blair is starting to look a little unsure.
We get a quick recap of some of the things that have happened tonight, which makes me feel better about forgetting them. Brunzell comes in for a double hiptoss but Warlord comes in with a bearhug. That doesn’t last long so Warlord has to slam his way out of an armbar. Warrior comes back in and gets taken down by the leg in a hurry because he isn’t the worker that the Warlord is. Blair stays on the leg but Warrior kicks him into the ropes so Warlord can low bridge him to the floor.
The bearhug goes on back inside but Blair is out in a hurry, allowing the hot tag to Brunzell to take over on Warrior. A catapult into a top rope clothesline drops Warrior as the referee is knocked outside. Cue someone who looks like Warrior (his other brother in the Power Twins) for a full nelson on Blair. Warlord goes up….and we cut to Brunzell throwing the referee back in and we come back to Blair covering Warrior for the pin and the titles at 11:50.
Rating: D. They were having a better match than usual (for this show at least) until the ending, which we didn’t actually get to see. Let me repeat that: you couldn’t actually see the part of the match that actually mattered in any way. Throw in that one of the villains had an evil twin and they managed to lose anyway and I think you know all you need to know about this one.
Jimmy Snuka says there are no two pieces of matter that can occupy the same space at the same time. I’m not sure what that has to do with anything but he says he’s going to fly.
Merch plug, the threequel.
Jimmy Snuka vs. Cactus Jack
Lumberjack match, so the ring announcer says “our next match is for the lumberjack match.” Oh and Cactus Jack is “a mean guy”. Announcer: “You’re going to see a battle royal.” Can we get him to stop saying that or at least find out what it means? Pretty much everyone else on the show so far are the lumberjacks, who get a round of applause of their own and their own individual introductions. Jack shakes his hand and grabs a headlock as we hear about Jack losing his ear.
Snuka reverses into one of his own, which really, really impresses Tolos for some reason. A shoulder puts Jack down as the announcers are talking about bets on the match. Jack knees him in the ribs to send things outside for a bit but makes the mistake of headbutting Snuka. That’s enough to send Jack to the floor but he’s sent back inside as Herb Abrams comes to commentary to talk about how great this is.
The brawl goes over to the commentary table (Gianelli: “THIS SHOULDN’T HAPPEN IN AMERICA!”) but the fight back inside where Jack grabs a chinlock. Back up and Snuka tries a shoulder, only to bounce off of Jack and over the top. They fight into the crowd with Snuka hitting him in the head with a chair….and that’s a double DQ at 9:03. Yes in a lumberjack. Announcer: “I’ve never seen anything like this!” There’s a reason for that man.
Rating: F. Mick Foley is my favorite wrestler of all time and probably always will be. I know it means the world to him to be in the ring with his idol in Snuka, but they had a double DQ in a freaking lumberjack match after nine other matches on this show. In this case, you kind of can blame him because, as a huge Snuka fan, he refused to let Snuka lose to him here so this was the best they had. Points for the respect but….dang man.
Post match they keep brawling into the empty chairs, which is about as dumb of an idea as you can have in any situation.
Herb Abrams shouts that this is the main event, thank goodness.
UWF World Title: Sid Vicious vs. Steve Williams
Williams is defending. Announcer: “It’s time to get rocking and rolling. And I’m getting out of here.” They trade shoulders to start as we hear about Williams being the All Japan Triple Crown Champion. Sid kicks him in the face for a knockdown and it’s time to crank on Williams’ arms. Williams can’t quite reverse so he goes to the ropes for the break instead. Tolos does his best Jim Ross impression to list off all of Williams’ accomplishments as the announcers treat this like the greatest thing they have ever seen.
A chokeslam plants Williams and Sid whips him hard into the corner. Tolos: “If they went into the New York Stock Market, do you think their stock would go up overnight???” Gianelli: “I don’t know.” Sid gets two off a slam and we’re off to the chinlock. They even lay down a bit as this has already been a bit much for them.
Williams fights up and slugs away….as the mat starts coming up like there’s a bubble inside, because OF FREAKING COURSE IT DOES! Williams hits a splash in the corner for two but misses a middle rope shoulder. Sid goes up top (oh boy) but Williams backdrops him down and hits the Doctor Bomb, drawing in Dan Spivey for the DQ at 11:02.
Rating: D-. They were having a watchable power match until the ending but my goodness man. THE RING wanted out of this show and was giving up by the end. It could have been a lot worse but the ending didn’t help anything and teasing a rematch on this show was as dumb as it could have been. Not the worst match on the show, but a perfect way to end things.
Post match the beatdown is on with Williams being double powerbombed. Johnny Ace comes in for the save.
Post break, Abrams asks if Williams will defend the title against Sid in a cage. Williams says he’ll sign a contract if Abrams gets one together before he leaves.
Merch plug, featuring the now dastardly Sid.
Abrams yells at Sid and Spivey, with the former blaming Blackjack Mulligan for being his mentor.
Commentary says next time will be even more treacherous.
Since this show just can’t end, Abrams and Mulligan (who has the World Title for some reason) talks about how this was a Skyscrapers (Sid/Spivey) plan all along. Abrams promises (or maybe warns) us about a sequel to end the show.
Overall Rating: Awbooga. That’s how Abrams, legendary cocaine addict that he was, would probably try to spell wrestling at this point, because WOW. This is one of the all time insane shows that you almost have to see to believe. There is nothing approaching good, nothing approaching normal, and nothing approaching ANYTHING that should be taking place in 1994 on this show.
I know Abrams was kind of a kook (that’s putting it mildly) but sweet goodness this was awful, with one random title match after another and nothing even partially good. The people here are talented wrestlers, or at least they were a few years earlier when they were still regularly wrestling and not ancient in some cases. It’s not the complete train wreck of something like Heroes of Wrestling, but with a barely there (and barely audible) crowd, the disaster on commentary and ring announcing and such low level wrestling, this is a complete mess and something just more depressing than anything else.
The biggest problem here is the wrestling, as they seem to think that any of this stuff matters just because you throw a title or the REVENGE MATCH moniker onto a match. It doesn’t help if there are no stakes to the title or reasons for these people to be fighting and it showed badly. All time awful show, and now I’m off to have nightmares of Abrams screaming in my face while Mulligan is there every time for no apparent reason other than he’s been paid in advance. Avoid this one unless you’re in for a train wreck of Star Fox 64 Forever Train level proportions.
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Beach Brawl Date: June 9, 1991 Location: Manatee Civic Center, Palmetto, Florida Attendance: 560 Commentators: Craig DeGeorge, Bruno Sammartino
Since my readers enjoy seeing my never ending spiral into madness, I present to you the Universal Wrestling Federation’s lone pay per view effort. This show is legendarily bad and one that I had on my original list of shows that I wanted to look at when I started reviewing shows. I’m not sure why I never got around to it but here we go. Let’s get to it.
We open with a look at Gorgeous George and Bruno Sammartino, when wrestling was still great. That’s how the UWF was founded, with Herb Abrams wanting to bring things back to the glory days.
A not exactly inspiring opening video shows what we’ve got coming tonight. It’s like the 1980s fell asleep and stumbled into a mostly empty arena.
Bam Bam Bigelow is ready to win the TV Title.
Steve Williams is ready to win the TV Title. Or as he puts it, he’s “going to wear the gold around his belt.”
The arena is dark, likely because no one is here.
Herb brings out the TV Title and picks Gordy to win.
Ricco explains what we’re going to be seeing tonight and gives us the two hotlines to call. He’s no Gene Okerlund.
Bam Bam Bigelow has been training hard for his match, but clearly not for thinking of interesting to say for this interview. The most interesting thing mentioned here: it’s his son’s birthday.
Steve Williams doesn’t have any surprises for Bigelow tonight because Bigelow knows what to expect. He’s been on top of the world everywhere so everyone knows that when he walks into a room, excitement happens. So Bigelow, be ready for a fireman’s carry or an armdrag! Or maybe the Oklahoma Stampede.
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Black Hearts vs. Fire Cat/Jim Cooper
The Black Hearts (which was spelled Black Harts during the opening video) are Apocalypse and Destruction (better known as Gangrel) and have Luna Vachon, with a snake around her neck, with them (Whom Bruno says is attractive. There’s an image I NEVER need to see again.). Cat would be briefly known as Battle Kat in the WWF. Luna and the Hearts have a small goblet which spits out some smoke and now we’re ready to go.
Cooper gets double shouldered down to start but manages to legsweep let’s say Destruction. A middle rope elbow takes Cooper down though and a jumping clothesline drops him again. Destruction gets uppercutted into the corner and it’s Cat coming in for two off a Hart Attack (with an elbow instead of a clothesline). A shoulder puts Cat down but he’s right back with a wristlock….to send Destruction outside?
Back in and it seems that the Hearts have changed places, with commentary not being sure which is which. Cooper avoids a middle rope elbow and it’s Cat coming back in to pick up the pace. A superkick puts Apocalypse on the floor again and it’s time for a breather. Back in again and Cat rolls Destruction up for two as DeGeorge talks about all the media covering the show. They probably didn’t have trouble finding a seat.
A crucifix gives Cat two, with Bruno calling it clever. That’s enough for the Hearts, who hit a double flying shoulder for two more. Apocalypse’s northern lights suplex gets two on Cat but he DDTs his way to freedom. Cooper comes back in but gets cheapshotted as everything breaks down. The Veg-O-Matic finishes Cooper at 6:51.
Rating: D+. Oh yeah this is going to be a rough one if this is what they picked for an opener. It’s not a terrible match or anything but it’s something that has been done better about a million times. This was a pretty dull and lifeless match with little doubt about who was winning the whole way. If this was supposed to make me want to watch the rest of the show, we’re in trouble.
Post match, Luna chokes a bit.
DeGeorge tries to explain where Palmetto is, eventually saying it’s about 45 miles south of Tampa. Maybe that has something to do with the horrible attendance? Just perhaps?
Luna wants more competition for the Black Hearts.
Terry Gordy vs. Johnny Ace
Street fight (also known as “we wish we were in Japan”) and Ace is Mr. All America. Even commentary acknowledges that the fans don’t care about him. They grapple against the ropes to start and it’s already a bit more energetic than the opener. Ace counters an atomic drop into a headlock, meaning that energy is already gone.
The headlock takeover puts Gordy down again and they stay on the mat for a bit. Gordy fights back up so Ace hits a middle rope spinning crossbody but Gordy blasts him with a clothesline for two. They go into the corner as DeGeorge talks about the Blackhawks in the first match. Gordy’s belly to back suplex gets a rather slow two, followed by a powerbomb for two more.
Gordy charges into a boot in the corner and Ace dropkicks him to the floor, setting up a dive to take him down again. Ace sends him into some chairs as they finally remember that this is a street fight. They fight beyond the crowd to show off the empty seats….and it’s a double countout at 6:27. In a street fight, leaving the announcers rather confused.
Rating: F. They had a double countout in a street fight. It doesn’t help that there was nothing street fightish about it until the last thirty seconds and what we got before then was hardly anything worth seeing. This show is already showing how weak it really is as we’re thirty minutes in and it feels like a bad indy show rather than some game changing pay per view.
Post match they keep fighting for a few more minutes until….well no one breaks it up actually. Gordy throws a chair in and dares Ace to join him but that’s not happening. For some reason Gordy turns his back and Ace chases him off, even stealing the chair. What a villain….I think? Gordy leaves but Ace follows him to brawl some more as this is almost longer than the match itself.
Mask Confusion vs. Power Twins
Mask Confusion is the Killer Bees and the Power Twins are Larry and David with John Tolos. Well they’re supposed to have him at least but the UWF isn’t allowing him to be here in front of these idiot fans. As you would guess, Masked Confusion is not masked. Larry shoves Brunzell around to start and a cheap shot from the apron lets the twins pound away. They aren’t bright enough to keep Brunzell from crawling to the corner so it’s off to Blair.
Larry is catapulted into David to knock both of them outside in the requisite heap. Back in and it’s a double spinning toehold on Larry, allowing Brunzell to crank on the leg. Black twists it around a bit as they start laying on the leg. There’s a double wishbone for two and it’s right back to the leglocking. Larry rakes the eye though and brings in David, who is taken straight down into the same spinning toehold.
This one doesn’t work as well and some forearms to the back set up the bearhug on Blair. The Twins stay on the back and add a double backdrop, with Blair landing on his hip. Choking on the rope and in the corner ensues as Blair can’t get anything going. A double clothesline gives Blair a breather but David is smart enough to knock Brunzell off the apron.
Blair is knocked outside as well and they come up in masks, meaning that other than their size, shape, height and energy levels, there is no way of telling them apart. They make the most obvious switch possible and Brunzell makes the comeback, including the dropkick for two. An assisted sunset flip lets Blair pin David at 13:04.
Rating: D+. And that might be the match of the night so far. I still don’t get why we’re supposed to cheer for a team like Masked Confusion who blatantly cheat but they were faces for most of their WWF run so I guess it counts. Sure they did the masked thing there too so it doesn’t make much more sense either, but never let that be a problem. This was a formula based tag match so it was a little better, though not by much.
Ladies Championship: Candi Devine vs. Rockin Robin
For the inaugural title and Sammartino is having none of DeGeorge oogling Devine. They start fast with Devine knocking her down and hitting a backdrop but Robin gets her boots up in the corner. The front facelock goes on and a sunset flip only gets two. Devine slingshots her down and grabs the Boston crab (not a very good one mind you). Back up and Robin slugs away before avoiding a knee to the ribs. Robin hits a clothesline and takes her into the corner for some right hands. A missed charge into the corner lets Robin grab a rollup for the pin and the title at 6:20.
Rating: D. This was a slightly above average women’s match for the time but you could tell that they weren’t going to get much better than they did here. That’s fair enough to them as well as women’s wrestling just did not matter at this point. To her credit though, Robin was one of the better and more under appreciated women of the time. Given that there was no story here and what they had to work with, they did as much as they could have.
We recap Colonel DeBeers vs. Paul Orndorff. DeBeers didn’t like the idea of a black man refereeing his match and attacked him a few times, including one rather big beating. Then one day the referee started wrestling so DeBeers whipped him with a belt….and Orndorff is in there somewhere, even if he’s not shown here.
Paul Orndorff vs. Colonel DeBeers
Strap match and Orndorff comes out to Can’t Touch This, which is rather disturbing in a variety of ways. The rules are a little weird here as there is one strap and the referee throws it into the air like a jump ball in a basketball game to determine who gets it. The taller DeBeers gets it and hammers away, including some shots in the corner.
DeBeers misses a charge into the corner though and Orndorff uses his feet to bounce DeBeers on the top. The strap to the throat sets up some choking from DeBeers but he comes back with a slam. He can’t find the strap so he goes up, allowing Orndorff to pull out the strap and knock him out of the air. Orndorff grabs a quick piledriver for the pin at 3:17, even though DeBeers’ shoulder was up.
Rating: D+. There was no time here but Orndorff had the same energy and intensity that he always showed. The strap rules were a bit weird but I’ll take this over the touch all four corners deal any day. It helped that this was the only match with and kind of a story so far too, so I’ll take what little I can get.
Post match Orndorff waves the American flag but DeBeers comes back up with a taser to knock Orndorff out. DeBeers even steals the flag to make sure that this continues.
Here’s Captain Lou Albano for the Captain’s Corner. He doesn’t like his guests tonight but he’ll bring them out anyway, meaning the Black Hearts with Luna Vachon. Albano rants about how he doesn’t like all the evil talk….and he walks away without any of the three talking. Did they just need to fill in some time here?
Bob Backlund vs. Ivan Koloff
Legends match and Koloff has a generic manager named Mr. Red. Koloff has the chain of course and Backlund comes out to Stars And Stripes Forever, just in case you needed to have the idea hammered into you. Neither gets anywhere with a hammerlock attempt to start as Koloff drop toeholds his way out of a hammerlock.
Koloff goes to the ropes to escape another hammerlock and then takes Backlund down for some legdrops on the arm. The short armscissors has Backlund in trouble but he does the lift, which isn’t as impressive as Sammartino was explaining what he would be able to do. A backdrop sets up Backlund’s O’Connor roll out of the corner…..for the pin at 2:27. Well that was quick, with Backlund looking almost as polished as anyone on the show so far.
Post match, Backlund talks to some kids for a nice moment. After Backlund leaves, here’s Lou Albano to knock out Mr. Red and steal his pants.
We recap Bob Orton/Cactus Jack vs. Wet N Wild, which seems to be a rematch from February and March, with both times seeing a surfboard involved.
Wet N Wild vs. Cactus Jack/Bob Orton Jr.
Jack and Orton have John Tolos with them. Wet N Wild are Sunny Beach and Steve Ray and one of the few gimmicks that makes a lot of sense at a show called BEACH Brawl. It’s a brawl to start with Wet N Wild dropping Orton and Jack so they can shove Tolos into a shark cage. The cage is raised and we settle down into a regular match. Jack throws Beach outside in a hurry and Orton knocks him down again, setting up the middle rope elbow to the concrete. Seriously…….just dang Jack.
Back in and Orton stomps away on Beach, setting up a not great looking suplex. Jack’s Russian legsweep gets two but Beach grabs a fall away slam. The hot tag brings in Ray to clean house but the ref gets bumped in the corner. Everything breaks down and Tolos throws brass knuckles to Orton. If you don’t know what is going to happen next, you have no business reading this. Beach gets the pin on Jack at 4:33.
Rating: D+. This felt like “we’re desperately out of time but here’s a finish”. The ending was one of the lamer finishes you can find but at least they did something to give the good guys the win. It doesn’t help that the match was, yet again, something that flew by and didn’t have time to do anything whatsoever.
Post match Jack is busted open and the brawl is on with Tolos not being able to break it up.
We look at how Bam Bam Bigelow and Steve Williams made the tournament finals. Bigelow beat Ivan Koloff, Colonel DeBeers and Cactus Jack while Williams beat Nikolai Volkoff, Steve Ray and then drew a bye.
UWF SportsChannel TV Title: Bam Bigelow vs. Steve Williams
For the inaugural title. The bell rings but we need to have Herb Abrams bring out the title, which will be the company’s top title as they don’t have a World Title. Williams isn’t waiting though and Abrams is shoved down, only to have Bigelow hit a clothesline and headbutts. Some shots to the face have Williams busted open early but he explodes with a heck of a clothesline.
Some knees to the face have Bigelow down again but he comes back with the headbutts (not a good idea as he is busted open as well). Bigelow’s slingshot splash gets two and he plants Williams with a DDT. The top rope splash gets two but Williams is back with a belly to belly suplex for his own near fall. Another clothesline connects and Williams is getting all fired up. Some running shoulders drop Bigelow and a powerslam gets two. Williams can’t hit the Oklahoma Stampede so he settles for another powerslam to finish Bigelow for the title at 7:33.
Rating: C-. And that’s your match of the night with a resounding “well it wasn’t THAT bad”. They did a decent power match here and Williams winning is a marginally better choice. Then again, Bigelow would be main eventing Wrestlemania in less than four years and Williams would be heading back to Japan so…..honestly it’s about a tossup for their respective futures.
Post match, Williams praises Bigelow and says he’s ready for every challenger. Abrams challenges every champion everywhere to come and face Williams.
The announcers talk about what we just saw.
Williams talks about how awesome he is but needs to leave to see another doctor. For some reason, the interviewer counts the pin on the replay in Spanish.
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Quick recap of the results (again with the Black Harts being spelled differently and it’s Backlund, not Backland) wraps things up.
Roll credits.
Overall Rating: F. I don’t know how to say this, but it’s really not the worst thing I’ve ever see. It’s really, REALLY bad, but there’s nothing on there that makes it legendarily bad. The bigger problem here is more that there’s absolutely nothing worth watching and the show is a big waste of time. If this is what they wanted to challenge the main two promotions, they’re reaching Vince Russo levels of delusion.
Overall, the show just feels like the most low budget of indy shows with a bunch of names who were past their primes but probably worked cheap. There isn’t even anything to get mad about, as the only really bad/stupid thing was the double countout in the street fight. There is no reason to watch this as it’s not Heroes of Wrestling or anything close to it, but rather a completely lifeless show that felt like it got caught in a time warp and staggered into 1991. Don’t watch this and just let it be remembered for what it was: forgetful.
Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:
This is one of those wrestlers that I really don’t care for all that much: Terry Taylor.
Taylor got his start back in 1979 and we’ll pick things up in Memphis on January 8, 1983.
Bobby Eaton/Sweet Brown Sugar vs. Jacques Rougeau/Terry Taylor
Rougeau is the Mid-America Champion and Taylor is the Southern Champion. Sugar is more famous as Koko B. Ware. Taylor and Eaton get going to start and things speed up, which you know is going to be at least moderately awesome. Off to Sugar who is immediately taken over in a headlock by Taylor. Rougeau comes in and things slow down a bit. We get a test of strength resulting in Rougeau monkey flipping Sugar down.
Back to Eaton who is taken down by another headlock as things slow down even more. Eaton has black hair here which is an odd look on him. The heels finally wake up and cheat to take over on Jacques. Taylor gets a quick hot tag and cleans house, only to get poked in the eye and taken down. Sugar works on his back and then the arm as the fans are WILD about Taylor. Back to Eaton with a knee drop for no cover.
Sugar comes in again and I think this is 2/3 falls. They’re really bad about letting us know these things in advance. I get that it’s a common thing of the era, but if you’re someone like me who doesn’t get to see this regularly, a little notification would help. Taylor finally gets away from Eaton and it’s off to Rougeau for a quick middle rope dropkick on sugar, good for the first fall.
We start fall #2 with Sugar taking over on Rougeau. Back to Eaton as Jacques is in trouble early on. After some quick offense from Eaton, Sugar comes back in for a fast chinlock. Rougeau misses a cross body out of the corner as Eaton ducks and gets two off of it. Jacques finally makes a comeback but doesn’t tag for some reason. Eaton trips him up coming off the top, allowing Sugar to drop an elbow on him for two.
Rating: C. There’s no time for a third fall so this is going to end in another draw. This wasn’t bad and it was fast paced enough, but I’m not a big fan of Koko and I’m certainly no fan of Taylor. Still though, this was certainly interesting enough to keep my attention for the last fifteen minutes of the show. Not great but not bad so we’ll go right in the middle.
Off to the NWA at Starrcade 1985 after Taylor had started to make a name for himself in the territories.
National Title: Buddy Landel vs. Terry Taylor
Landel is challenging and this is for the Georgia Championship Wrestling main title. Terry, I think the face in this match, takes Buddy down to start and gets some fast near falls off various leverage moves. Landel is basically a Ric Flair tribute wrestler, even using the Nature Boy as his ring name. Buddy fires back but runs into a boot in the corner from the champion.
Terry goes after the arm so Buddy pulls back and BLASTS him with a single right hand to knock Taylor down. That looked great. Here’s JJ Dillon to cheer on his man Landel. I’m not sure why he wasn’t here to start with but whatever. Anyway Terry gets clotheslined down but comes back with a counter to a suplex for two.
Off to a camel clutch by Landel which goes on for a bit as JJ talks a lot of trash. Terry starts to fight out and dropkicks buddy down before standing on his face. That’s a new one. The referee is knocked down so JJ throws in a foreign object and Taylor gets knocked silly for a very close two. Terry comes back and loads up a superplex, only to have Dillon trip him down and let Buddy land on top for the pin and the title.
Rating: D+. Not much to see here but then again neither guy was ever anything of note to begin with. Buddy would be thrown out of the company a few months later due to drug problems and Dusty would get the title as a result. Taylor would go on to the UWF and then the WWF, where he would become a half man half rooster. Wrestling is funny like that sometimes.
Off to the UWF on March 7, 1987.
Tag Titles: Eddie Gilbert/Sting vs. Terry Taylor/Chris Adams
Taylor and Adams are defending. Sting is in street clothes for some reason. Gilbert says Sting has torn his bicep so a guy named Mike Boyette is replacing him for one night. Eddie and Taylor start us off and here’s King Parsons for no apparent reason. The match starts and he jumps on the mic to say hang on a second. He calls out Adams as a jailbird and a sucker, which draws Adams out of the ring. Ok so now back to the match.
It’s Gilbert vs. Taylor still and now off to Adams who throws Gilbert around. Boyette comes in as does Taylor and the heels take over on him. Neckbreaker gets two for Gilbert as does a suplex. Taylor manages to tag as does Gilbert and we’re out of time. The credits roll but Adams hits a quick superkick to retain. I’m not rating it due to the length that we actually saw, since most of the match was the Parsons thing.
Taylor would win the UWF TV Title and defended it in a unification match at Starrcade 1987.
NWA TV Title/UWF TV Title: Nikita Koloff vs. Terry Taylor
This is a unification match between the two Television Titles. Taylor has Eddie Gilbert with him as backup. Taylor grabs a headlock to start but is easily run over by a shoulder block. They head to the corner and amazingly enough we get a clean break. We go to another corner and Taylor tries a cheap shot, only to get punched in the face by Nikita. Taylor cranks on the arm so Nikita sticks his tongue out at him and puts on an armbar of his own.
Terry headbutts out of the hold but Nikita rams him shoulder first into the buckle. More right hands have no effect at all and Nikita cranks away on the wristlock into a hammerlock. Koloff muscles him down into a cover but Taylor makes the ropes and heads outside. Back in and Taylor talks some trash, earning himself a slap in the face. A backdrop gets two on Terry and its time for more stalling on the floor.
Nikita gets tired of waiting and pulls Taylor back in so he can put the hammerlock right back on. After a rope breaks saves Taylor, he pounds on Nikita in the corner but misses an elbow drop. Back to the armbar which has dominated this match so far. They get back up again and Taylor pounds away, only to be choked to the mat. The Russian Sickle misses though and Nikita charges into the buckle. They head outside with Taylor ramming Nikita’s shoulder into the post to take over.
The match slows down a lot as Taylor’s offense isn’t exactly suited to beat on someone like Koloff. He stays on the arm but can’t bring Nikita down into a sunset flip. Koloff blocks a suplex and takes the smaller guy down with a suplex of his own. Nikita has enough of the pounding and fights back with a bunch of right hands in the corner. Taylor comes out with an atomic drop to get two of his own and Koloff’s momentum is stopped cold.
A rollup gets two for Nikita as the fans are finally starting to get into the match. Terry loads up a piledriver but gets backdropped down and punched in the face. They head to the floor again but Gilbert hits Koloff in the knee to give Nikita control again. Off to a figure four on the Russian which gets a few near falls (the figure four can be used as a pin if the guy in the hold doesn’t raise his arms). Koloff finally gets the ropes and beats up Gilbert before hitting the Sickle on Taylor for the pin and the titles.
Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me. It was nearly twenty minutes long and way too much of that was spent in a hammerlock. I’ve never been a fan of Taylor but at least Koloff was there with the hard hitting stuff to make things somewhat interesting. This wasn’t terrible but it was too long and dull for what it was worth.
Soon after this it was off to the WWF as the Red Rooster, the wrestling bird. Somehow he stuck with the character for years and yes it crippled his career. He started off well though, appearing in the main event of Survivor Series 1988.
Team Mega Powers vs. Team Twin Towers
Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Koko B. Ware, Hillbilly Jim, Hercules
Big Bossman, Akeem, Ted DiBiase, Red Rooster, Haku
Savage is world champion and this is based on a tag team feud which would be blown off in a huge live match on February 3. Hogan comes out to his own theme music after his partners all used Savage’s. This is actually a plot point as the Mega Powers would explode because Savage thought Hogan was taking his spotlight. It’s a Wrestlemania rematch with Savage vs. DiBiase to start things off.
They knock each other down with DiBaise taking over in the corner. The champ comes back with right hands and a clothesline. Off to Hercules who is feuding with DiBiase as Ted had called Hercules a slave, prompting a face turn. Instead Herc gets the Red Rooster who doesn’t do well at all, which is the idea. Heenan said he could take anyone, even Rooster, to the top. Off to Koko who gets in a shot to Ware and it’s off to Akeem (One Man Gang).
Haku comes in with a chop but misses a legdrop and it’s back to Herc. I’m not sure why when you have Hogan and Savage on the apron but whatever. Now it’s off to Hogan and the place erupts. He takes Haku down and drops some elbows before bringing Hillbilly in for a quick main event opportunity. Akeem comes in and runs Jim over before bringing Rooster in. Even Gorilla found that stupid. Jim doesn’t do much to Rooster so here’s Koko instead.
Rooster rams Koko’s head into the buckle, but see, Koko is black so it doesn’t hurt. A missile dropkick gets two on Red and it’s off to Hogan. The big boot sets up Savage’s elbow and it’s 5-4. Hogan’s team has a massive in ring celebration while Bossman’s team hits the floor. Heenan rips into Rooster as we get Savage vs. Haku. Haku chokes on the ropes but Hogan makes a blind tag and, brace yourselves, actually loses a slugout!
Haku hits a nice dropkick but gets slammed down and it’s off to Herc. A suplex puts Hercules down and it’s off to Akeem. A splash misses and it’s off to Hillbilly who fires away with all he’s got. Jim’s big boot doesn’t take Akeem down and a clothesline floors Jim. The 747 (big splash) gets the pin and we’re tied up. Koko comes in and dropkicks Akeem in the back before wisely bringing in Hogan to do the heavy lifting.
Back to the world champ with a double ax to the head but they can’t knock Akeem down. Hercules pounds away a bit as does Koko with a dropkick only sending Akeem into the corner. Akeem shrugs it off and hits Koko once to take over. Off to Boss Man who hits his namesake slam to make it 4-3. It’s Hogan in now and this is the match everyone has been wanting to see.
Hogan pounds him into the corner and everyone left on Hogan’s team (Hogan, Savage, Hercules vs. Bossman, Akeem, DiBiase, Haku) gets in a shot. Hogan easily slams the then bigger Boss Man but he charges into a spinebuster. That looked really good too. Back to Akeem and the big men hit a double elbow to take Hulk down. Off to Haku who gets in some shots to the neck before tagging in Boss Man. I wonder why they’ve gone so long since having DiBiase in there.
Naturally as I say that he comes in and clotheslines Hogan down. A falling punch gets two but Hogan Hulks Up. Off to Hercules for some revenge and some hard clotheslines and punches. Virgil trips him up though and a school boy eliminates Hercules. It’s now 4-2 but Savage charges in and rolls up DiBiase to pin him within about ten seconds.
Haku comes in again but misses a headbutt, allowing Hogan to get the tag. Something like a superkick takes Hulk down and it’s back to Boss Man for some headbutts tot he back. Akeem comes in for his usual shots before it’s back to Haku again, who suplexes Hulk for two. It’s nerve hold time followed by the Boss Man Slam for no cover. Instead Boss Man goes up and misses a splash.
The hot tag brings in Savage who cleans house. Slick trips Randy up and things slow down again. Boss Man puts on a bearhug as Slick goes after Liz, grabbing her by the arm. Hulk makes the save and DRILLS Slick with a right hand. The Towers go to handcuff Hogan to the rope but Boss Man gets counted out in the process. Boss Man beats on Hogan with the nightstick and then goes to beat on Savage. Akeem helps with that, drawing a DQ for himself and getting us down to Hogan and Savage vs. Haku.
Hogan is still cuffed to the rope though so it’s basically a one on one match. Haku beats on Savage as the camera is on the Towers leaving. Slick has the keys and is taunting Hogan with them. Savage holds the rope and avoids a kick but there’s no Hogan to tag. Haku accidentally superkicks Slick and Liz raids his pocket to get the key. Hogan is freed and Haku hits a top rope splash for two. Hot tag to Hogan and since it’s 1988, you can fill in the ending for yourself.
Rating: C+. While not great, this was better than the previous match to be sure. This would be part of the Mega Powers Exploding, as Savage would be jealous of Hogan for getting the glory and not being there for him earlier in the match. It’s no classic or anything, but 80s Hogan is always fun.
Off to Saturday Night’s Main Event with #19.
Tito Santana vs. Terry Taylor
Remember that Heenan is on a mic so we can hear everything that he’s saying. Taylor is undefeated somehow. George Steinbrenner is here. They speed it up so if nothing else it’s interesting looking. Heenan argues with Steinbrenner which is interesting as all goodness obviously. We shift over to a more common style of match. This is interesting as it’s mainly just Bobby talking and you rarely hear from him in the manager role.
After some stupid stuff from Taylor Heenan goes off on him and they shove each other. This is Santana doing most of the work. Keep in mind that I can’t stand Taylor at all. This is horribly boring stuff. Santana gets a rollup for the pin. A boring argument starts, leading to Taylor vs. Brooklyn Brawler of all things. Heenan gets beaten up afterwards.
Rating: D. This was about as boring as you can ask for. It was all storyline but they left out the interesting part of the storyline. This was just boring as all goodness and I couldn’t care less. Do you have any idea how hard it is to make a Tito Santana match dull? Granted it didn’t help that the focus was on Steinbrenner.
From Saturday Night’s Main Event #20.
Red Rooster vs. Brooklyn Brawler
The match starts while we’re in a break and it’s a squash. It’s a minute long and Rooster wins with a small package. I think that’s longer than the “blowoff” of Rooster vs. Heenan at Mania.
And here is that match from Mania V.
Red Rooster vs. Bobby Heenan
There’s actually a backstory: Heenan managed Rooster but said he was limited so Rooster dumped Heenan. Bobby is hurt so he brings the Brooklyn Brawler with him. Those sentences take as long to type as the match lasts as Rooster hits him once, Heenan misses a charge into the post, gets whipped into the buckle and the match is over in 30 seconds. To recap, Rooster beat him with an Irish whip.
That’s about the extent of the good in the Rooster run but we’ll wrap it up with the last two big matches in 1989, starting at Summerslam.
Mr. Perfect vs. Red Rooster
Perfect is still perfect at this point. They shove each other around to start until Hperfect shoves him down and hits a hiptoss. Things speed up a bit with both guys running the ropes and Perfect trying a slam. Rooster slips down the back and tries a slam of his own but can’t get Perfect up in a weird spot. Perfect sends him to the floor for a second and pounds away back inside, only to be shoved to the floor by Rooster. Perfect wins a quick slugout on the floor before going inside for the PerfectPlex and a very fast pin.
Rating: D. This was very odd with the match finishing out of nowhere after no build at all. The match had to be cut for time or maybe an injury because there’s no way this was the match they were planning. Or maybe they didn’t have time because we needed Dusty to have an even longer chinlock. These two are capable of having a far better match though and did many times.
And ending at Survivor Series.
Dream Team vs. Enforcers
Dusty Rhodes, Brutus Beefcake, Tito Santana, Red Rooster
Big Bossman, Bad News Brown, Rick Martel, Honky Tonk Man
This is mainly over Dusty vs. Bossman which is Dusty’s first big feud in the company. Dusty stole the nightstick and the hat which has ticked Bossman off. The rest of the guys are there because it’s Survivor Series and we need six more guys. Brutus’ music was awesome, just like the names for the teams. Tito and Honky start things off and for the third straight year Honky and Brutus are in the opening match on this show. I’m not sure what that means.
Tito takes over quickly but Honky gets in one kick before RUNNING over to make a tag to Martel. Rick dropkicks Tito down as Jesse talks about the now broken up Strike Force. Tito atomic drops Martel for two and everyone but Bad News gets in the ring at once. Nothing happens but it’s cool to see. Brown not getting in is perfect for his character too. Off to the Boss Man who is immediately armdragged down by Tito.
Off to Dusty who pounds away as the fans go nuts. Chicago was a big NWA town so it’s easy to see why he’s popular. Brutus comes in to another pop but Boss Man takes him down with a few shots to the back. Honky comes in but misses a fist drop. Beefcake hammers away but Martel makes a blind tag and takes over on Brutus. Rooster comes in and the place goes quiet. When you can’t get a reaction in Chicago, things aren’t that good for you.
Martel hits some knees to the face and it’s off to Honky who dances a lot. Boss Man comes in and they slug it out with the big man taking over with ease. Martel comes back in and drops some knees but gets rolled up for two. Back to Honky as Rooster is in trouble. I’m digging these four man versions already as the match seems less crowded and the guys can stay in the ring a little longer. Rooster and Honky collide and it’s a double tag to give us another battle of Strike Force.
Tito goes loco on Martel and beats him down, but Martel breaks the figure four. Santana tries an O’Connor Roll but Martel rolls through and grabs the trunks for the first elimination. Dusty comes in next and hits a dropkick (and a decent one) followed by the big elbow…for two? We must be in the WWF. Brutus comes in to work on the arm and stomp on Martel’s face when he tries a reverse monkey flip.
Rooster comes in and can’t seem to figure out what to do with a headlock. Martel is like screw you you nitwit and backbreaks him down. Off to Boss Man who slaps on a bearhug. Gorilla keeps calling Brutus the team captain but the team is called the Dream Team and Dusty came out last. Rooster bites out of the hold and Boss Man tags Bad News who isn’t interested in coming in.
After Bad News gets pulled in he takes over because he’s fighting a freaking rooster. Just like last year though, Bad News accidentally gets hit by his partner and he walks out. It’s three on three now and we have Boss Man vs. Brutus. After the Barber gets beaten on some more it’s off to Honky for a belly to back suplex. Out of nowhere Brutus hits a high knee to Honky for the fast pin, making it 3-2 (Brutus, Dusty and Rooster vs. Boss Man and Martel).
Martel immediately comes in and puts a chinlock on Brutus which doesn’t last long. The second version of it does though as the match slows down a lot. A backbreaker puts Brutus down and he goes into the buckle a few times. Brutus grabs a sunset flip again out of nowhere to eliminate Martel and it’s 3-1. Brutus tags in Rooster to throw a bone to Boss Man and after some punches from Rooster, the Boss Man Slam gets the fast pin and it’s 2-1.
Dusty is in next but it’s quickly off to Brutus for some knees to the chest. Back to Dusty as the good guys are using some intelligence (yes, Dusty and Brutus are using intelligence) with the fast tags. Boss Man gets whipped into the ropes and Dusty takes him down with a cross body, likely rupturing at least three vital organs of Boss Man and getting the final pin. I may have been right about those organs.
Rating: C+. Nothing special here but it was fine for an opener. The fans liked most of the good guys and other than Rooster, that was a solid set of guys. The match wasn’t competitive or anything for the most part after the first five minutes but there was nothing particularly bad about it I guess.
It was back to WCW soon after this and we’ll start at Halloween Havoc 1990.
Bill Irwin vs. Terry Taylor
This is before Taylor is computerized and he’s no longer a farm animal. Jack Brickhouse of the Chicago Cubs is on commentary here. He’s a commentator so at least he has an idea here. The ring mat is red here and the buckles are orange if I forgot to mention that. Taylor works on the arm to start and things slow down a lot already. Irwin is a cowboy kind of guy so he has the bandana around his neck.
Taylor comes back with a missile dropkick for two. He takes it to the mat and hooks a headlock to slow things down again. Brickhouse used to be a wrestling announcer apparently. Irwin takes over and rams Taylor into his knee. A knee drop misses and it’s back to the headlock. Brickhouse snaps off a bunch of names he’s watched over the years, including Gotch and Hackenschmidt. Dang how old is this guy? His age would mean he couldn’t have seen them so apparently the guy is a liar. Good to know.
Irwin takes over again and the announcers insult Gordon Solie a bit. Brickhouse names off some other guys he used to watch, most of which you’ve heard of. He also knows most of the modern guys which is interesting. This guy could be a regular commentator. The match is being TOTALLY ignore but to be fair, it’s nothing of note with mostly rest holds. Irwin puts on a chinlock as JR is talking football.
There’s a boring chant going on now and it’s completely appropriate. Dangerously tries to get the commentary back on the match but I really don’t care to hear about it. Sleeper goes on as Brickhouse talks about Verne Gagne developing that move. I seem to remember it being Johnny Weaver but Gagne was certainly around first so maybe it was him. Then again it’s just a choke so it’s kind of a stretch to say any one person invented it.
A bridging belly to back gets two for Taylor but he walks into a tombstone for the same. Now we’re talking about the WCW Top Ten which was one of those things that was around for years but it never really meant anything. They head outside and Irwin is knocked off the ramp to the floor. Taylor takes over and drops a knee for two. Irwin chokes some more but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. A small package gets the same for Rooster Man, as does a rollup. Irwin puts him down with a spinebuster but doesn’t cover him properly, allowing Taylor to roll him up for the pin.
Rating: D-. What a boring match. Brickhouse, a guy that would have been in his mid 70s at this point, was by far the most interesting thing here. He seemed interested in being there and was talking wrestling almost the entire match, which is far more than you’ll get from most guest commentators. The match itself sucked as no one wanted to see it and neither guy did anything to make it better.
Taylor would turn heel soon after this and had a match at WrestleWar 1991.
Z-Man vs. Terrance Taylor
Taylor is part of the York Foundation which is kind of a business organization type of heel stable. It was just starting at this point and would eventually get going in a few more months. This is No DQ after three previous matches didn’t have a clean ending. The idea here is that Alexandra York (Terri) has a computer that gives Terry a perfect plan for the match. They start with some basic stuff and Terry bails to York for instructions. They try it again and Terry gets punched in the face again.
After more talking with York it’s time for another punch from Z-Man and it’s down to the mat. Zenk drills him again and it’s time to talk to the computer. They slug it out and Zenk sends him into the ropes for a backdrop for two. Time for the headlock again as this match keeps starting and stopping which is what gets annoying about a lot of matches.
The headlock stays on even after Z-Man runs up the corner for a headlock takeover. A belly to back finally breaks the hold and Nikita Koloff is in the audience. Out to the floor and Taylor rams him into the barricade and chokes away a bit with a camera cord. Back in and a backbreaker gets two. Off to a camel clutch and let’s look at Hiro Matsuda in the crowd. Ok then.
Zenk comes back with a clothesline over the top which is fine because it’s a No DQ match, even though a clothesline over the top has been perfectly legal in every other match ever in WCW. They head to the floor again and Z-Man gets sent into the barricade. Z-Man comes back with a neckbreaker and superkick for two. This is before Shawn popularized the move so it looked a bit more exciting back then. An enziguri puts Taylor down for two but as Z-Man comes off the top with the cross body, York distracts the referee. Zenk yells at him long enough to get rolled up with tights for the pin.
Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but it didn’t get better until after they got done with the stupid computer nonsense. These feuds went on for a long time and eventually the Foundation grew into a cool and complex four way feud which almost got over huge but various things screwed it up. Decent stuff here though.
He then opened Great American Bash 1991 in one of the worst ideas ever to open one of the worst shows ever.
Bobby Eaton/PN News vs. Steve Austin/Terrence Taylor
Now those are some pretty weird teams. Austin is TV Champion and has Lady Blossom and her rack of AWESOME with him. Oh, and this is a SCAFFOLD match. It’s the capture the flag version too, meaning that you have to have these guys crawl across the scaffold, get the flag and bring it back to the other side. You can also shove both opponents off the scaffold but since that would be entertaining, that’s not going to happen.
The heels (Austin and Taylor) stall for fear of going up and possibly, you know, dying. After a few minutes we’re ready to “go”. Eaton walks out to the middle and Taylor inches out to him. The scaffold is MAYBE three feet wide so they’re barely able to move. Austin comes out and they stand around a bit more. Actually there is a reason for these two to be fighting: Eaton lost the TV Title to Austin.
Austin almost falls down as we’re waiting for contact. Their hands touch after thirty seconds and Austin hits a weak punch. Eaton slams Austin’s head into the scaffold, drawing Taylor out to help. This match is almost two minutes in now so you can see what I’m dealing with here. The fat man (News) comes out after Austin so Austin backs up again. Taylor comes out instead and News shoves him into Austin at the end of the scaffold, shaking the whole thing.
News and Austin fight in the corner as Taylor and Eaton go to the other side. There are railings there which give the guys a bit more security so they don’t have to be so worried about falling. Oh and the flags are the same colors so you can’t tell which is which anyway. News and Eaton are both on their stomachs and you can see that the scaffold is a freaking piece of plywood.
All four go into the heel corner so Eaton grabs the flag and casually walks across for the win. Wait that isn’t a win as Eaton comes back with the flag. Lady Blossom hands Austin some spray of some sort which blinds both of Austin’s opponents. Not that it matters as Eaton and News are declared the winners anyway.
Rating: Agoobwa. WOW. I didn’t think it was possible for an opening match to be this horrible. I was very, very wrong. I mean……WHAT IN THE FREAKING WORLD WERE THEY THINKING??? You had four guys (one of them over 400lbs) who were afraid that they would fall and break a major limb and you give them three feet to walk around on? Back in the 80s they had some of these and while they sucked, at least there were A, falls and B, A REASON FOR THE GUYS TO FIGHT! Horrible, horrible thing (it’s certainly not a wrestling match) but this isn’t on the guys in it one bit. They did all they could out there safely.
Back to regular TV at Clash of the Champions XVIII with Taylor now full heel as Terrance Taylor and part of the York Foundation.
Terrance Taylor/Tracy Smothers vs. Brian Pillman/Marcus Alexander Bagwell
Neither team has ever worked together before but injuries changed the original match. The York Foundation is broken up and Taylor is now just the Taylor Made Man and wears nice clothes. Pillman and Taylor get things going as we hear about Pillman wanting a rematch against Liger after losing the Light Heavyweight Title.
Pillman scores with some quick atomic drops and knocks down an invading Smothers as well. Taylor comes back with a backbreaker for two on Brian but everything quickly breaks down with the good guys clearing the ring. They hit stereo dives over the top to put both villains down and the fans are very pleased. Back in and Smothers scores with a back elbow to Bagwell’s jaw and a clothesline gets two. Taylor comes in and snaps Bagwell’s neck for two but Tracy’s splash hits knees.
Pillman comes back in by jumping over the top and hammering away on Tracy. A big spinwheel kick gets a two count but Taylor comes in sans tag, allowing for a double team when the referee is with Bagwell. Taylor suplexes Pillman from the ring to the floor and brings him back inside for a gutwrench powerbomb and a close two count. Tracy comes back in and knocks Pillman off the apron with another jumping back elbow. Pillman slingshots in with a clothesline to nail Tracy and everything breaks down again. Brian dropkicks Taylor into Tracy, knocking him into a sunset flip to give Bagwell the pin.
Rating: C+. This was a formula of taking four fast guys and putting them into a match. Bagwell gets to have some ring time and earn a big more experience which is all you can do with a young guy like him. Everyone else looked good and the whole match worked very well. Two good matches in a row to start the show.
Here he is with another very talented guy at Halloween Havoc 1991.
Terrance Taylor vs. Bobby Eaton
This should be good. Taylor slaps him around to start so Eaton offers him a free shot. Eaton is the face here and it’s still York Foundation time for Taylor. He takes Eaton down with an armdrag but the second one is countered. Bobby speeds things up and Taylor bails to the floor. They go to the floor and Eaton is sent into the barricade, but he backdrops Taylor over the railing and into the crowd for a second.
Back in and Taylor tries to hide. Eaton blasts him with a right hand for two and it’s off to a hammerlock. Rooster Boy gets out with a jawbreaker and they go to the ramp. Eaton slams him down and hits a knee/splash off the top to crush Taylor. Back in and Taylor sends him through the ropes and into the barricade again. Taylor uses the break to go over to the computer and York for more assistance.
The solution is apparently a corner clothesline followed by a knee drop for two. They head to the ramp again and Eaton is put down by a gutwrench powerbomb. Eaton slowly gets back in and takes a top rope splash for two. We hit the chinlock which is broken somewhat quickly but a knee to the ribs stops it dead. Taylor gets some more computer advice and apparently is willing to settle for the countout.
That doesn’t work and Bobby comes off the top with a sunset flip for two. Off to a reverse chinlock by Taylor but Eaton comes out of it with a jawbreaker, just like Taylor did to him earlier. Taylor’s Vader Bomb hits knees and it’s time for Bobby’s comeback. He pounds away in the corner and suplexes Taylor down for two. A swinging neckbreaker puts Terry down but Eaton goes up and gets crotched. Taylor’s superplex is broken up and Eaton hits the Alabama Jam for the pin.
Rating: B. This was a great back and forth match. It’s amazing how much more bearable Taylor is when he isn’t acting like a bird. The computer gimmick got annoying after awhile but having him wrestle straight worked pretty well. This wasn’t quite a masterpiece but it was a very solid sixteen minute match and a nice change of pace.
And then a title match at WrestleWar 1992.
US Tag Titles: Greg Valentine/Terry Taylor vs. Freebirds
It amazes me how far tag wrestling has fallen. There are midcard tag titles here. The Freebirds are faces here and for the life of me I don’t get what was seen in Valentine and Taylor as a team. There are two rings here which is always kind of strange but it’s still cool. The Freebirds both use the DDT here so they’re looking for the quick win. Fonzie from ECW is the referee here.
Taylor and Hayes start us off and the fans more or less hate Taylor. At least they’re smart. It’s just strange seeing the Freebirds as faces. Also Greg Valentine is a champion in 1992. What’s weird about this picture? A backhand chop is a judo chop according to Jim. For those of you unsure, the Freebirds are Jimmy Garvin (no one of note really) and Michael Hayes, who is currently the head writer for Smackdown.
ALL Freebirds so far but this is a long match so there’s plenty of time left. We’re about eight minutes in and the champions haven’t been on offense longer than maybe 20 seconds yet. I could watch Valentine fall on his face every day. It’s just perfectly done. The heels take over for a bit and I emphasize the bit part since Garvin takes over again to get us to even.
Hayes gets a hot tag and cleans house. The crowd is hot tonight which gives me a good feeling about the main event. Hayes gets hit in the back of the head with the Five Arm, Terry’s finisher but it only gets two. Fans are completely behind the Freebirds. Taylor gets a gutwrench powerbomb for two on Hayes which is a move I wish we saw more often. We’re nearly fifteen minutes in and Jesse says it’s too early to go for the figure four.
Valentine works on the arm which is just weird for him but whatever. This has been a good match so I can live with that. Another hot tag to Garvin and he cleans house. Everything goes insane and Garvin gets a DDT on Taylor for the pin and the titles. Solid opener and the crowd is happy so everything worked. The titles would be retired in July so it’s not like it means much.
Rating: B. Great opener here as the crowd was way into it and the title change works well to open a show. Starting a show with a good tag match is pretty much a universally good idea and this was no exception. I’m not a fan of any of these four but this was a very solid match and has me wanting to watch more of the show, which is exactly the point of an opener.
It was back to the WWF soon after this, thankfully minus the clucking. We’ll pick things up on Raw, February 22, 1993.
Crush vs. Terry Taylor
It’s another squash as Crush gets to throw Taylor around for a bit. The interesting note during this match: Vince talks about Bill Clinton appointing Hulk to head up his physical fitness council. That’s all well and good, but we get a phone call from “Arnold Schwarzenegger” (Bartlett doing a decent impression), ranting about how he wants that position. Taylor hooks a chinlock and a jawbreaker before Crush throws him off. A few power moves set up the Headvice on Taylor for the submission.
Rating: D. Seriously, WHAT IS UP WITH THIS BARTLETT GUY??? I get that he’s a comedian, but that begs the question: if you want comedy, why is Bobby Heenan not doing this role? He’s a funny guy and actually knows what he’s talking about in wrestling. Bartlett is certainly trying but he’s just not in the right role here.
Then it was back to WCW where we’ll wrap things up with a title match on Saturday Night, January 1, 1994.
TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Terry Taylor
They tie up to start and fight to the corner for a break. After a quick standoff they head back to the technical chain style. Taylor gets a nice bridge to break out of a wristlock but Regal pulls him right back to the mat. The fans chant USA because Regal is an evil dirty foreigner. Back to the mat and Regal nips up to get out of a test of strength position. This is going to be a mat based match and I didn’t expect anything else.
Taylor hooks a body scissors with his legs which goes on for awhile. Tony talks about Flair being the new world champion, which is interesting when you consider this was taped about three weeks before Starrcade. Taylor keeps control and goes after the arm. Regal nips up again but Terry takes him right back down. They go back to the mat and Taylor works the arm even more.
The fans aren’t exactly thrilled with this, but then again they all got in free which was a very common practice at this time. The mat based technical stuff isn’t helping anything here. Regal takes over and it’s more arm work. Now for a change of pace, Taylor works on the arm! Regal gets up but Terry hooks a rollup for two. We’ve gone 12 minutes (not quite) out of the 15 and they fight over a butterfly suplex. They fight over a backslide which gets two for the challenger. That’s Taylor if you weren’t sure of it. Off to a pinfall reversal sequence with Regal getting the pin off a handful of trunks.
Rating: D+. Technically this was fine but at the same time the match itself was really boring. The arm work is a very scientific style but as you can see with the crowd like this, they don’t want to see technical stuff. I love the old school style but stuff like this gets very boring. These TV Title matches were usually a lot like this one though, which is why the big showdowns were much better.
Terry Taylor is a guy that was a very solid hand in the ring but he never got out of the midcard. Granted a big part of that is due to being best known as a wrestling bird. On top of that there’s his name. Wrestling is usually about masculine names and Terry really doesn’t work, especially when it’s just a guy in trunks. He was good in the ring, but not good enough to overcome all that.
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Time for an African from Chicago: the One Man Gang.
Gang started in 1977 but we’ll pick things up in the UWF on September 17, 1986.
UWF Title: One Man Gang vs. Terry Gordy
Gordy is defending and this is heel vs. heel. They screw the feeling out process to start with Gordy charging at Gang but only bouncing off of him. Terry kicks him out to the floor and follows him out to keep hammering away. Back in and a clothesline gets two on the Gang as the fans are getting behind the champion. General Skandor Akbar trips Gordy to take over and the champion is busted.
Gordy gets stomped down in the corner and the blood is flowing. After nothing of note on the floor, they head back inside with Gang raking the eyes to stop a comeback attempt. Gordy fights back and goes after Gang on the floor again as both guys are bleeding now. Gang blocks a piledriver attempt and the referee gets bumped. A whip into the corner breaks the turnbuckle and a brawl causes the match to be thrown out.
Rating: D. This was long and mostly dull with a lot of standing around and slow, pounding forearms. The Gang never was much to watch but he could do this decently enough. That being said, a hero to fight him instead of another villain didn’t make this work for the most part. Dull match.
The Gang would be in the WWF less than a year later and have this match on Prime Time, August 17, 1987.
One Man Gang vs. Junkyard Dog
The Gang jumps him to start but Dog comes back with big right hands. I think Jake Roberts and Don Muraco are on commentary for some reason. Dog puts on a hammerlock followed by the falling headbutt and another hammerlock. Back up and Gang pounds away in the corner, only to be taken down by another wristlock. We hit an armbar before Gang fights up again and punches Dog a few times. The fans get behind JYD and he fights back, only to go after Slick. Dog and Gang fight over a cane and shove the referee down for a double DQ.
Rating: D+. It got a little better at the end but the first part of this was very dull stuff. Even the announcers were pointing out that the Dog was putting on weight and getting slower, which isn’t something you want to see against a guy like the Gang.
Gang would be part of the Wrestlemania IV tournament.
WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. One Man Gang
Gang pounds away in the corner to start and Bigelow is in trouble. This is one of those big guys that pound away on each other with basic stuff but it looks better because they’re huge matches. Bigelow comes back with a forearm and a low splash for two. Bam Bam pounds away and hits a headbutt and then about four more to take over. He hits the ropes and Slick pulls the rope down though and Gang pounds on him on the apron enough to cause a countout. Too short to rate but this was lame. I think Bigelow had a bad knee here too.
And his second match after getting a bye into the semi-finals.
WWF World Title Tournament Semifinals: One Man Gang vs. Randy Savage
Savage and Liz are in black for this one. Randy tries to lock up with him to start which isn’t his best play here. Gang shoves him into the corner and pounds him down then does it again for a few more minutes. A pair of splashes miss and an elbow sends Gang into the ropes and out to the floor. Savage tries a slam but gets choked down instead. Liz gets on the apron for no apparent reason as Slick throws in the cane, but Gang gets caught swinging it for the DQ.
Rating: D. Nothing to see here and Savage on defense can’t save most of a match. This is the second win over a Slick client of the night and he would spend the summer feuding with more of them. Gang was a decent big man but at the end of the day he was just another monster for a hero to vanquish. Not that there’s anything wrong with that as people can make a great living like that, especially in the 80s.
Somehow the Gang got a WWF Title shot at the first SNME after Wrestlemania.
WWF Title: One Man Gang vs. Randy Savage
Any bets here? I love Slick. Vince says Savage will be sky high for the match. That’s just funny. The interview would suggest Vince is right. Interesting little note that is a sign of the times: all six guys have gotten entrances tonight, but these are the first with music. Savage chases Slick to the back and we’re ready to go. This is exactly what you would expect given who is in there.
Gang is rather sloppy and that’s as nice as I can make it. In a painful looking move, Savage grabs Gang by the beard and jumps over the ropes to clothesline Gang. Freaking OW man. Slick is back now and he gets Gang the advantage which he already had. This is pure formula stuff but a white hot crowd is helping things a lot.
Savage hits the always sweet top rope double axehandle. I love that move and he did it better than anyone else. A second rope splash more or less seals this as Gang misses it. WOW that was worded badly. A cane shot from Slick misses and hits Gang and there’s your elbow. Guess what happens next.
Rating: C-. Simple yet it did its job to perfection. This was to get Savage an easy title defense on TV and it did just that. Short at around 6 minutes so this was perfect. Savage was over as all goodness if nothing else so the crowd was very into this.
Then he became an African named Akeem in a bizarre moment. This led to a big push and a team with the Big Boss Man known as the Twin Towers. They would lead a Survivor Series team against the Mega Powers’ team at Survivor Series 1988.
Team Mega Powers vs. Team Twin Towers
Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Koko B. Ware, Hillbilly Jim, Hercules
Big Bossman, Akeem, Ted DiBiase, Red Rooster, Haku
Savage is world champion and this is based on a tag team feud which would be blown off in a huge live match on February 3. Hogan comes out to his own theme music after his partners all used Savage’s. This is actually a plot point as the Mega Powers would explode because Savage thought Hogan was taking his spotlight. It’s a Wrestlemania rematch with Savage vs. DiBiase to start things off.
They knock each other down with DiBaise taking over in the corner. The champ comes back with right hands and a clothesline. Off to Hercules who is feuding with DiBiase as Ted had called Hercules a slave, prompting a face turn. Instead Herc gets the Red Rooster who doesn’t do well at all, which is the idea. Heenan said he could take anyone, even Rooster, to the top. Off to Koko who gets in a shot to Ware and it’s off to Akeem (One Man Gang).
Haku comes in with a chop but misses a legdrop and it’s back to Herc. I’m not sure why when you have Hogan and Savage on the apron but whatever. Now it’s off to Hogan and the place erupts. He takes Haku down and drops some elbows before bringing Hillbilly in for a quick main event opportunity. Akeem comes in and runs Jim over before bringing Rooster in. Even Gorilla found that stupid. Jim doesn’t do much to Rooster so here’s Koko instead.
Rooster rams Koko’s head into the buckle, but see, Koko is black so it doesn’t hurt. A missile dropkick gets two on Red and it’s off to Hogan. The big boot sets up Savage’s elbow and it’s 5-4. Hogan’s team has a massive in ring celebration while Bossman’s team hits the floor. Heenan rips into Rooster as we get Savage vs. Haku. Haku chokes on the ropes but Hogan makes a blind tag and, brace yourselves, actually loses a slugout!
Haku hits a nice dropkick but gets slammed down and it’s off to Herc. A suplex puts Hercules down and it’s off to Akeem. A splash misses and it’s off to Hillbilly who fires away with all he’s got. Jim’s big boot doesn’t take Akeem down and a clothesline floors Jim. The 747 (big splash) gets the pin and we’re tied up. Koko comes in and dropkicks Akeem in the back before wisely bringing in Hogan to do the heavy lifting.
Back to the world champ with a double ax to the head but they can’t knock Akeem down. Hercules pounds away a bit as does Koko with a dropkick only sending Akeem into the corner. Akeem shrugs it off and hits Koko once to take over. Off to Boss Man who hits his namesake slam to make it 4-3. It’s Hogan in now and this is the match everyone has been wanting to see.
Hogan pounds him into the corner and everyone left on Hogan’s team (Hogan, Savage, Hercules vs. Bossman, Akeem, DiBiase, Haku) gets in a shot. Hogan easily slams the then bigger Boss Man but he charges into a spinebuster. That looked really good too. Back to Akeem and the big men hit a double elbow to take Hulk down. Off to Haku who gets in some shots to the neck before tagging in Boss Man. I wonder why they’ve gone so long since having DiBiase in there.
Naturally as I say that he comes in and clotheslines Hogan down. A falling punch gets two but Hogan Hulks Up. Off to Hercules for some revenge and some hard clotheslines and punches. Virgil trips him up though and a school boy eliminates Hercules. It’s now 4-2 but Savage charges in and rolls up DiBiase to pin him within about ten seconds.
Haku comes in again but misses a headbutt, allowing Hogan to get the tag. Something like a superkick takes Hulk down and it’s back to Boss Man for some headbutts tot he back. Akeem comes in for his usual shots before it’s back to Haku again, who suplexes Hulk for two. It’s nerve hold time followed by the Boss Man Slam for no cover. Instead Boss Man goes up and misses a splash.
The hot tag brings in Savage who cleans house. Slick trips Randy up and things slow down again. Boss Man puts on a bearhug as Slick goes after Liz, grabbing her by the arm. Hulk makes the save and DRILLS Slick with a right hand. The Towers go to handcuff Hogan to the rope but Boss Man gets counted out in the process. Boss Man beats on Hogan with the nightstick and then goes to beat on Savage. Akeem helps with that, drawing a DQ for himself and getting us down to Hogan and Savage vs. Haku.
Hogan is still cuffed to the rope though so it’s basically a one on one match. Haku beats on Savage as the camera is on the Towers leaving. Slick has the keys and is taunting Hogan with them. Savage holds the rope and avoids a kick but there’s no Hogan to tag. Haku accidentally superkicks Slick and Liz raids his pocket to get the key. Hogan is freed and Haku hits a top rope splash for two. Hot tag to Hogan and since it’s 1988, you can fill in the ending for yourself.
Rating: C+. While not great, this was better than the previous match to be sure. This would be part of the Mega Powers Exploding, as Savage would be jealous of Hogan for getting the glory and not being there for him earlier in the match. It’s no classic or anything, but 80s Hogan is always fun.
The big tag match was at Main Event II on February 3, 1988.
Twin Towers vs. Mega Powers
This is an hour long show and the match is over twenty minutes long so if you didn’t get the idea, this is the only reason to watch this show. After the Towers get to the ring, we get a video about Hogan and Savage. This isn’t your typical video however. This is set to a WAY too upbeat song called You’re A Friend Of Mine by Clarence Clemens Jackson Browne. Look it up and picture a highlight package of Hogan and Savage. It looks like the intro to a REALLY bad sitcom. I can’t make this stuff up people.
Hogan and Savage say there is no issue with these three. The underlying theme here is that Hogan allegedly loves Liz but Hogan insists it’s just like a brother and sister. In short, this became about Hogan which Savage didn’t like which has to be at least half legitimate. Everyone talks a lot here and hey now let’s have a match.
Boss Man starts and Savage and Hogan both want to start for their team. Boss Man wants Hogan so Savage can’t get his way again. Hogan looks especially orange tonight. The heels are cleared out by Super Hogan alone and the fans are WAY into it. The little things in this match like Savage wearing Hogan’s colors with the words Mega Powers written on them but Hogan wearing his usual gear is very well done.
Akeem comes in and here’s Savage to meet him. Oh wait never mind Hogan needs to come back in. He even comes off the second rope to work on the arm a bit. Boss Man hits a Piledriver and Hogan does his fish out of water dance on the mat. I’m not sure if it looks more like that or a steak being grilled. One or the other. Jesse points out that Hogan is hogging the ring time and he’s absolutely right at this point.
Slick gets involved so Savage drills him in the face. Spinebuster which is unnamed at this point gets two. Savage finally comes in this has been ALL Mega Powers. Top rope cross body puts Akeem down but Slick gets a shot in to take down the Macho Man and momentum shifts. Savage is still world champion here if I didn’t mention that and you’re not familiar with this era.
And now we get to the meat of this show. Akeem throws Savage to the floor and he wipes Elizabeth out, landing right on top of her (lucky). She’s GONE and Hogan goes to try to help her which ticks Savage off for some reason. “Oh no the woman I love is getting helped after I was incapacitated! SCREW THIS!” Hogan carries Liz to the back in as dramatic a fashion as possible. He leaves with her as they check her out.
We get the other fun part of this as Hogan’s acting is at its peak here. Keep in mind we stay on Hogan and Liz for like 3 minutes with ZERO talk of what’s going on in the ring. Back from a break we get a bumper of the match and now back to General Wrestling Hospital. Hogan keeps saying thank God and making weird noises. I don’t have the video up as I’m typing here and the sounds are just disturbing. Leaving out the word God it’s God Elizabeth God Elizabeth and random moaning and groaning and breathing sounds.
FINALLY he realizes he’s left his partner for like ten minutes against two monsters so he comes back for the save and the glory. Oh but instead of like, I don’t know, GETTING IN THE RING and beating the heck out of one of the guys and helping Savage, he gets on the apron and grabs the tag rope. Savage continues to do all of the work and beats up Boss Man but won’t tag Hogan.
Savage slaps Hogan nice and hard and leaves him. Serves the bald nitwit right too. Macho stands on the floor and then leaves with his belt. For once Hogan has absolutely no one to blame but himself here. More on that later though. Air Africa (Akeem’s splash) hits Hogan, he Hulks Up, Boss Man apparently asks Slick if he knows where he can find a good turkey on rye as he pays NO attention to what’s going on and Hogan gets the pin.
Rating: C. Total angle here with a match as the backdrop but this was a big deal to put it mildly. This would be like Orton turning on Cena when they had been best friends for like a year. The match is just ok but that’s all it needed to be. Hogan’s hammy acting aside, this was perfectly fine for what it was.
The team would drop down the card a good bit and have an early match at Wrestlemania V.
Rockers vs. Twin Towers
That would be Big Boss Man/Akeem. Shawn makes his Wrestlemania debut by starting against Big Boss Man and the little guy takes over quickly. He also decks Akeem in the corner and gets to face the bigger man (Akeem, the former One Man Gang). The Rockers start flying in and out of the ring as they work over Akeem’s arm. The arm cranking continues but Akeem makes a blind tag. Marty gets tossed into Boss Man’s arms and crushed by both big men. This is back when Boss Man weighed about 400lbs so it’s a big more painful than it sounds.
The Towers take their turns with fat man offense as Marty is in big trouble in a hurry. Akeem avalanches him in the corner and it’s back to Boss Man. We get heel miscommunication though and Boss Man is knocked to the floor by his own partner. Off to Shawn who pounds away in the corner before both Rockers hit a series of whips into the corner. A double middle rope shoulder finally takes Akeem down for two and it’s back to Shawn on his own.
Akeem KILLS HIM with a clothesline (Jesse: “I think he irritated Akeem!”) but Boss Man misses a top rope splash. The Rockers hit some double dropkicks (one of which sees Shawn completely missing Bossman) but a top rope rana is countered into a wicked powerbomb by Boss Man. Akeem crushes Shawn with a splash for the pin.
Rating: C. Considering how hungover the Rockers were in this match (as confirmed by Shawn), this came off pretty well. The Rockers sold the power offense like few others could, which made for some awesome visuals. They would get a lot better over the coming years but this wasn’t their best performance.
The team would still be around at the end of the summer and wrestle in a six man tag at Summerslam 1989.
Twin Towers/Andre the Giant vs. Demolition/Jim Duggan
Duggan is King of the WWF and has his face painted like Demolition but is rocking an American flag pattern of course. Akeem starts with the King with Duggan absorbing the trash talk and pounding away on the big man before it’s off to Ax for some pounding on the arm. Smash comes in and Demolition pounds Akeem down before bringing Duggan back in to crank on the arm as well.
Akeem finally gets in a shot to Ax’s ribs and it’s off to Boss Man who is immediately pounded down by the fresh Smash. Boss Man rakes the eyes to slow Smash down but Smash rakes the eyes right back in a good bit. Ax comes in again and cranks on the arm but gets sent into the wrong corner so Andre can come in and pound away with big right hands.
Akeem comes back in but misses a slow motion splash, allowing for the hot tag back to Smash who slams Akeem down in an impressive power display. Everything breaks down and Akeem hits a bottom rope splash on Smash, but Duggan hits Akeem in the back with the 2×4 to give Smash the pin.
Rating: C. It wasn’t much of a match but for above seven and a half minutes with these six guys, this was as good as you were going to get. Duggan was about as big as he was going to get in the WWF at this point as the fans were WAY into his Hogan-Lite character. Demolition was fresh off losing the tag titles but but they were still the most popular tag team in the company. Good, fun little match here which was much better than I was expecting.
One more WWF match, from Superstars on April 28, 1990.
Intercontinental Title Tournament First Round: Akeem vs. Tito Santana
Santana gets caught in the corner but comes back with some fast right hands. The big man heads outside and is holding his eye, earning Tito a warning. Back in and Title cranks on the arm to make Akeem shout a lot. Akeem fights up but misses a splash in the corner, only to be dropped by some dropkicks. The Figure Four is easily broken but Akeem gets caught by the flying forearm to send him outside for the countout.
He was soon off to WCW where he had a match at Great American Bash 1991.
El Gigante vs. One Man Gang
Gang is in a freaky monster look here with insane hair for no apparent reason. His manager Kevin Sullivan talks forever on the way to the ring about a death wagon. Gigante has four midgets with him for no apparent reason. Sullivan and Gang cut Gigante’s hair prior to this. The small guys get on Gang’s nerves until Sullivan hits one and we’re ready to go. Gang runs to the ramp but is quickly thrown back in.
Gang rams into Gigante and that goes nowhere. Gigante hiptosses him and hits the worst shoulders in the corner you’ll ever see. Gang avoids a corner charge and hits a middle rope clothesline to put Gigante on the ropes. Gang finds a wrench from somewhere and beats on Gigante with it which goes nowhere either. He rams the wrench into Gigante over and over but the giant won’t go down.
FINALLY some knee shots put him down and Gang works on that a bit. A splash gets two and Gigante throws Gang to the apron on the kickout. Gang gets slammed off the top, suplexed, rammed into Sullivan, has powder kicked into his face and gets clotheslined in the back of his head for the pin.
Rating: F. You know, I used to love El Gigante as a kid, but he makes Great Khali look like Daniel Bryan. I know that sounds like it’s way over the top, but I kid you not he was that bad. This was a terrible match as Gigante can’t sell anything, he has a bad arsenal, and even he couldn’t get the fans to wake up. Remembering that he was probably the second biggest face in the company at this point, that says a lot.
He would disappear for several years after this and hit the indies. Gang would come back to WCW in 1995 and somehow get a US Title run. Here’s one of his matches as champion, from January 22, 1996 on Nitro.
One Man Gang vs. Hulk Hogan
Gang is US Champion here for no apparent reason and this isn’t a title match for the reason I’d assume of Hogan is above the US Title. Also note that this is going on after two title changes including the world title match. Tell me: what possible reason is there to not have this go first or second? Hogan against a generic monster is a bigger draw than a world title match between Savage and Flair? I don’t think so dude.
Gang jumps him early to start and the fat is on! Hogan fights back and we almost get a big boot 40 seconds in. Out to the floor and Gang goes into the steps. Almost all Hogan here. Hogan with a thumb to the eye and some biting of the head. Clothesline takes Gang down but Hogan puts his head down and here comes the champ. Gang hits a clothesline and his finishing move: a big splash. Hogan pops up before the cover, there are the punches, big boot, slam, leg drop and the squash of the US Champion is complete at 3:03. Have I mentioned I hate Hogan in this time period?
Rating: S. For SCREW YOU HOGAN. I get the idea of Hogan winning. I get the idea of Hogan beating a guy he has history with. I get the idea of Hogan being on TV. BUT WHY IN THE WORLD DID IT NEED TO BE THE FREAKING US CHAMPION??? You couldn’t put freaking Zodiac in there? Was Brutus Beefcake too important to allow him to lose in a squash? In three minutes, Hogan got hit with two forearms, a clothesline and the finishing splash and won anyway, totally clean against the US Champion.
Of course the reign didn’t last long so here he is trying to get it back at SuperBrawl VI.
US Title: Konnan vs. One Man Gang
So like I mentioned in the Starrcade review, Gang won the title and Konnan took it from him. Here’s your rematch. Konnan actually cared at this point and it was very apparent. He’s moving all over the place at this point and doing all kinds of weird and big spots that are working really well. To be fair though, I could give Gang a run for his money I think.
Konnan runs around and beats up Gang for about two minutes, as in the first two minutes of the match, but Gang gets one shot in and Dusty proclaims that Konnan has barely been on offense. That’s just amusing. A side slam is called a side salto. Apparently Gang has been called one of the best men in the business for years. What kind of undiscovered years are those Tony? Konnan is selling well too here which is helping a lot also.
Let’s show the WCW NASCAR driver for like 30 seconds. Not like we can have anything of note going on in the ring at the moment. There was a WCW Motorsports? Since when? Gang hits his splash and pulls him up. That should more or less seal this one. Gang goes to the middle rope (called the very top by Tony) and misses to ZERO, I mean ZERO reaction. Konnan goes up and hits a front flip onto Gang for the pin. Wow this was bad.
Rating: D-. Again, One Man Gang as a title contender? What in the heck were they thinking??? This was again just bad and the crowd was deader than Konnan’s career. I have no idea who thought it was a good idea to make him a featured guy, even for a little while, but it didn’t work. Terrible match.
After a meaningless (and hard to find) run in ECW, the Gang would take part in He….He…..it’s Heroes of Wrestling.
One Man Gang vs. Abdullah the Butcher
Oh this isn’t going to be easy. Gang has issues getting into the ring. We have an interview with him where he shouts the whole time. I would have preferred Akeem but whatever. Abdullah’s manager is named Honest John Cheatum. We’re a minute in and Abdullah is bleeding.
That man should have a blood bank named after him. I think this is a hardcore match but I’m not sure as it’s never actually told, but we’re told this should be a treat for hardcore fans. We have chairs and chains used so I’d assume it is one. Butcher is bleeding badly to the shock of no one at all.
It can’t be a good idea to have One Man Gang run the match. This just isn’t going to go well but somehow Gang has won a more prestigious title: he actually held the US Title for a few months in 1995. Abdullah’s manager gets on commentary for no apparent reason. I guess he just wandered over there and got bored with the match. He’s from Paducah, Kentucky of all places and talks like a southern preacher. And believe me, as I’ve heard a lot of southern preachers.
He likes saying where he’s from. Apparently Butcher is here to destroy the idols. This is just odd indeed. And he’s gone now. So Butcher is the favorite here, and therefore the man that’s being cheered, but he’s not the idol? Either that or he’s going to destroy himself. Gang is bleeding too due to the fork shots.
The elbow hits, although you wouldn’t know it because the cameras were elsewhere. Have we seen a single finisher tonight??? We get a double countout. Really? Really? These guys were afraid to lay down here? REALLY??? The brawl goes on forever as they fix/clean the ring.
Rating: F-. It was a hardcore brawl, but just not a very good one. They went with the smart thing here of the brawling but it just wasn’t that good, although this was the best they could do. It was a freak show match, but still, this is hardly a kid friendly show like they seem to be marketing it as.
And one more for the road. From I-Generation Superstars of Wrestling in 2001.
Australasian Title: One Man Gang vs. Tatanka
Yes seriously. Tatanka is defending and is the face, but wouldn’t you think he would be a heel for being so proud of being from another country? The Gang thanks the fans for their support but wants the women to wash their underwear before they throw them to him. Gang looks so old it’s unreal. He pounds away in the corner to start and gets two off a clothesline. Tatanka comes back with kicks and chops as this is somehow less interesting than the girls.
Gang is sent to the floor and complains about how bad he smells. He takes a walk up the aisle and after nearly a minute the fans fill the ring with trash. Back in and they trade wristlocks with Gang pounding down into the shoulder. Tatanka comes back with shots to Gang’s shoulder as well and a chop to the head for two. A nearly botched cross body gets two more for Tatanka but Gang hits one of his own for two. Tatanka works the leg for a bit as this is already going longer than it should.
Gang kicks him to the floor but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. The big man slowly drops knees as I go read Gone with the Wind to fill in the time. Off to a nerve hold until Gang drives some shoulders into Tatanka’s ribs. Gang misses a running charge in the corner but Tatanka charges into a boot in the corner. A big fat legdrop makes me wish I was watching a Yokozuna match but Tatanka avoids a second one. I’m assuming he does as the camera was on fans in NWO shirts.
Tatanka makes his comeback and a chop to the head gets two. He rams Gang’s head into the buckle but the referee is crushed off a whip. Gang is slammed off the top and chopped in the head but there’s no referee. The fat man loads up some brass knuckles and knocks out the Indian for the pin and the title after nearly TWENTY MINUTES.
Rating: F+. I’ll give Gang credit here: he was trying. He was playing to the crowd and actually moving a bit out there which is more than you can say for most of the wrestlers tonight. The match was WAY too long though and on a show already this bad there’s no reason for it to go this long. Did they only have twelve people for the show or something?
So….yeah the Gang wasn’t all that good. He had his spot as a big monster that could look intimidating, but that was old fashioned by the late 80s. When you have Randy Savage flying all over the place and being completely insane, a big fat guy isn’t much of a villain anymore. Gang had his time, but it came and went.
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UWF Championship Wrestling – March 7, 1987: Ted DiBiase As A Plucky Young Good Guy
UWF Championship Wrestling
Date: March 7, 1987
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bill Watts
This is still Mid-South, but under another name and several years later than I’ve been looking at. Crockett would buy out Watts the following month but the company would survive until the end of the year when it was basically written off while the top talent (namely Sting and a few others) would be incorporated into the NWA). Let’s get to it.
We open with a clip from last week with Michael Hayes and Sunshine putting Dark Journey in a small cage.
Watts talks about his sons being engaged or something. Also his son Erik is going to play college football.
Ken Massey vs. Sam Houston
Houston controls with a headlock and Massey hooks an armbar. Houston wakes up and the reverse bulldog ends this quick.
Wild Bill Irwin/Eli vs. Ted DiBiase/Iceman King Parsons
Irwin and Eli are part of Devastation Inc and they disagree with DiBiase coming out to Born in the USA. DiBiase promises to take the UWF Title off of One Man Gang and leave Akbar bloodied. Parsons might have joined Devastation Inc. but Parsons tells DiBiase to chill. Eli jumps DiBiase and Parsons just lets him do it. Parsons walks off so it’s a handicap match. Steve Cox comes out to be DiBiase’s partner as he’s getting beaten down two on one.
Wild Bill Irwin/Eli vs. Ted DiBiase/Steve Cox
DiBiase is in trouble as Irwin pounds away on him. Irwin misses a charge and DiBiase makes the diving tag to Steve Cox. Everything breaks down and Devastation Inc. is knocked to the floor, making them walk out for a countout.
Eddie Gilbert and Sting have a tag title shot tonight but Eddie says they should be given the titles because the titles were stolen in the first place. Missy Hyatt runs her mouth and good night her voice was annoying. Sting says they’ve been used and abused. It’s so weird seeing him as a heel.
Here’s a video on the Dallas Times-Herald that has been promoting the company. There are free posters in the paper every Sunday with the final one being the Freebirds. That’s kind of cool.
JR talks to King Parsons who goes on a big rant about how it’s DiBiase’s problem and it was his fault. Parsons speaks a lot of jive. This is about Chris Adams and a tournament that Parsons walked out on apparently. They were in the tag title tournament finals and Parsons walked out. They had feuded for about ten years and this is something about Adams being a legit convict. There’s someone named Savannah Jack who Parsons calls an Uncle Tom. He has a jailbird shirt for Adams too. Parsons has a very annoying voice. He has a bag of Oreos too.
Bobby Perez vs. Buddy Jack Roberts
After Bobby’s intro we see the UWF Top Ten. Roberts pounds him into the corner and puts Perez’s face into all the buckles. A few knee drops set up a legdrop and Perez is sent to the outside. A bulldog ends this.
Dark Journey wants to be in the small cage (the Penalty Box) with Sunshine. Hayes and Roberts come out to hold Dark Journey so that Sunshine can put something from a jar onto Journey. Missing Link and Chavo Guerrero run out for the save. Journey gets the jar but Missy runs in to hit Dark Journey. Missy gets the jar and leaves with Sting and Gilbert.
Kenny Johnson vs. Steve Cox
Cox is Steve Williams’ protege and a former football player so JR snaps off a bunch of stats and names that most people don’t care about. Cox hits a powerslam and side Russian legsweep for the quick pin to stay undefeated.
Dark Journey is with Chavo and Missing Link. This is clearly earlier on as Journey is in a totally different outfit and accepts the penalty box match. They talk about the cream but don’t know what it is.
Tag Titles: Eddie Gilbert/Sting vs. Terry Taylor/Chris Adams
Taylor and Adams are defending. Sting is in street clothes for some reason. Gilbert says Sting has torn his bicep so a guy named Mike Boyette is replacing him for one night. Eddie and Taylor start us off and here’s King Parsons for no apparent reason. The match starts and he jumps on the mic to say hang on a second. He calls out Adams as a jailbird and a sucker, which draws Adams out of the ring. Ok so now back to the match.
It’s Gilbert vs. Taylor still and now off to Adams who throws Gilbert around. Boyette comes in as does Taylor and the heels take over on him. Neckbreaker gets two for Gilbert as does a suplex. Taylor manages to tag as does Gilbert and we’re out of time. The credits roll but Adams hits a quick superkick to retain. I’m not rating it due to the length that we actually saw, since most of the match was the Parsons thing.
Overall Rating: C. It’s not a bad show but I certainly prefer the earlier ones. The world champion didn’t appear for some reason and while the stories here make sense, they’re nothing incredibly interesting. You have DiBiase as a top guy but he’d be gone soon. The company probably wouldn’t have died anytime soon though, as it was at least entertaining. I’ve never gotten the appeal of Eddie Gilbert though.