Lucha Underground
Date: July 20, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

We’ll wrap it up here with the season two finale and the final part of Ultima Lucha Dos. That means Pentagon Jr. challenging Matanza for the Lucha Underground Title, Taya vs. Ivelisse and Rey Mysterio vs. Prince Puma in a major battle of the generations. They’ve got their work cut out for them to top what they did last year and I’m not sure they can pull it off. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of all the major events this season, which really was divided up into two parts with the pre and post Dario return. Also there’s a lot of stuff that was basically forgotten, including Aerostar being a time traveler. They really do pack a lot of stuff into this and it’s done a great job of making me want to see the big finale.

Vampiro is in full Emperor Palpatine mode as Pentagon Jr. bows to him before the title match. Pentagon has to destroy the monster that broke him but there is still fear inside him. Vampiro takes him to a room full of Pentagons, who the real Pentagon must destroy. With those imposters easily dispatched, it’s time for the big showdown with the masked master. Pentagon rips the mask off and Vampiro says he’s ready but not before changing his name from Pentagon Jr. to Pentagon Black.

Trios Titles: Drago/Fenix/Aerostar vs. Johnny Mundo/Jack Evans/PJ Black

Mundo and company are defending but there’s no Taya. Johnny gets in a backbreaker to start on Fenix and it’s quickly off to Drago who gets in a spinning DDT. Black comes in sans tag but misses his top rope Lionsault. Aerostar’s corkscrew crossbody takes Black down again and a slingshot corkscrew splash gets no count as the referee actually remembers who is legal. It’s off to Fenix who superkicks Jack before the good guys clean house, only to have the referee stop the triple dive because they’re not legal.

The distraction lets Fenix get stomped down in the corner as the champs take over. Evans comes in for a whip to crotch Fenix before a double belly to back suplex into a neckbreaker gets two. Everything breaks down again as Striker keeps talking about the referee, which has gotten more attention here than anything else. Jack’s springboard is broken up with a superkick and a Canadian Destroyer plants Johnny.

Aerostar dives on the other champs and Fenix hits a great looking frog splash for two on Mundo. A slingshot splash from Aerostar and the springboard 450 from Fenix add up for two. The referee goes down so Mundo keeps getting beaten up until his partners FINALLY help him out with a belt shot to Fenix’s head. A triple belt shot to the head gets two (seriously?) so Black kicks the ref in the head.

The champs go nuts with Chikara’s BDK’s Ragnarok (Evans and Black hold Fenix up by the arms while a running Johnny flips him forward for a big crash onto his back) but there’s still no referee. Johnny puts the title on Fenix’s face but here’s Angelico on crutches to take Mundo out. Aerostar gets back up and springboards into a reverse moonsault to drop Evans. Another crutch shot sets up a Fenix Driver (Fire Thunder Driver) for the pin on Mundo at 11:50. That makes Fenix the first Triple Crown Champion.

Rating: B. Good choice for an opener here with a group of people going all over the place with a bunch of high spots and insanity. Angelico coming out made sense as Johnny won the title in the first place cue to Angelico being injured, presumably by Mundo in the first place. The referee stuff got a bit annoying as the story came out of nowhere but then was dropped halfway through the match. Still though, good opener here and that’s why you have matches like this one.

Dragon Azteca Jr. vs. Black Lotus

So Lotus mistakenly thinks Azteca’s father killed her parents and is out for revenge, which actually makes sense for a change. They start fast with some running flips and a headscissors to send Dragon down. As Vampiro says Lotus is sexy and turning him on, Azteca baseball slides her to take over for the first time. Azteca misses a flip dive but easily whips her into the barricade with some force. Back in and Dragon misses a high cross body (he isn’t the most accurate) to give Lotus two, only to have him pop back up with a roaring elbow. Azteca goes up but Pentagon of all people runs out to crotch him at 4:20.

Rating: D. I think we’ve seen our first Ultima Lucha match to be sacrificed due to time restraints. To be fair though, it’s not like this match had the biggest build in the world. This story has been kind of all over the place and the announcers can’t talk about it because they haven’t seen any of the buildup. You can barely talk about this one but Lotus looked fine while they lasted.

With Vampiro’s blessing, Pentagon breaks both of their arms. After a break, Pentagon says he’ll destroy Matanza with the new knowledge his master gave him. Now he’s Pentagon Dark and ready for anything, including taking down the monster because there is zero fear. Actually, let’s just do the title match RIGHT NOW.

Lucha Underground Title: Matanza vs. Pentagon Dark

Matanza is defending, Dario is in his corner and there must be a winner. Pentagon immediately hits a flip dive over the top to put the champion down. Vampiro keeps talking about the differences between Pentagon Jr. and Pentagon Dark as Pentagon knocks Matanza around ringside, including a hard whip into the barricade. An AA (not a Death Valley Driver announcers) has Matanza in even more trouble and he punches the post to make it even worse.

Some chairs to the back (including a La Parka guitar strum) knock Matanza around ringside and Pentagon whips him through some chairs. Matanza gets in a few right hands, only to be superkicked up against the barricade. Pentagon throws him through more chairs as this has been about 95% Pentagon through the first five minutes.

More chair shots to the leg keep Matanza in trouble on the floor and they FINALLY head inside. Dario: “Matanza! REMEMBER MAMA!” Matanza takes a third superkick and a running Codebreaker for two. A Backstabber gets the same so Dario is holding up the key. Pentagon wedges a chair in the corner (because wrestlers never learn) and is quickly sent head first into it for Matanza’s first major offense.

Matanza sends him flying with a pumphandle suplex and a standing moonsault gets two. Pentagon stands up after a German suplex and tells him to bring it. That means superkick #5 to the champ before a modified Wrath of the Gods (not an Irish Car Bomb Matt) gets two. Pentagon goes outside and stops a dive with a chair to the head, followed by a Canadian Destroyer to really knock Matanza silly.

Vampiro gets up and hands Pentagon a barbed wire baseball bat (the next logical step) but Dario knocks it out of his hands. Pentagon goes for Dario’s arm but Matanza hits him (weakly) in the back with the bat and hits Wrath of the Gods to retain at 11:32. The fans are NOT happy with that ending and swear quite a bit.

Rating: B. Uh what? No seriously, what was that ending? Pentagon completely dominated Matanza the whole match, shrugged off most of his offense and then gets beaten by two moves? That felt like they had no idea how to get out of this and just said “oh just have him hit his finisher to retain”. No build to it, no logical storytelling, no reason for Pentagon to lose that fast.

This match needed another five minutes or so and a lot more offense from Matanza if you’re going to go with that ending. Having Pentagon lose after a hard fought war is fine but having him lose after he basically squashed Matanza for ten minutes isn’t. If nothing else it makes your unstoppable monster champion look weak instead of like the killer he’s supposed to be. A recharged Pentagon is a great choice to give him a fight but they toned Matanza WAY too far down this time and it hurt the story a lot.

Post match Vampiro goes to help Pentagon but gets shoved away.

After a break, Vampiro takes his medicine, saying he failed.

Taya vs. Ivelisse

Basically they’re the two best women in the promotion (not named Sexy Star that is) and they’ve been feuding for a few weeks so here’s a match. Ivelisse takes her into the corner and drives Taya face first into the middle buckle ten times in a row. Vampiro keeps trying to get back into things as Taya knocks Ivelisse face first into the apron to take over on the floor.

Taya is sent into the chairs and they fight on the steps before crashing down. Back in and Iveliss kicks her down a few times before grabbing a release German suplex. A bridging German suplex gets two and there go the lights. Back with Catrina in the ring and hitting a double arm DDT drop (think a Bubba Bomb but a double arm DDT instead of a full nelson). The lights go off again and Catrina disappears, allowing Taya to hit a double stomp for the pin at 6:20.

Rating: C-. The match was fine enough but another screwy finish is a little annoying. It also doesn’t really settle anything between Taya and Ivelisse but rather sets up something for the next season, which seems to be the problem with this whole show: not a lot is actually being decided here in favor of setting something up down the road.

Post match Catrina appears again to give Ivelisse the Lick of Death.

We get a voiceover from Konnan of all people, talking about finding a new protege to train. Apparently he’s talking about Prince Puma, who gets a highlight video including beating up people in some warehouse. This turns into a quick video setting up Puma vs. Rey Mysterio.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Prince Puma

The King vs. the Prince and I’m fine with this as the main event as it really is a dream match by Lucha Underground’s standards. Rey even has the El Rey network logo on his back for a nice touch. They start fast (of course) and it’s time to flip around a lot into a standoff. A headscissors from Rey is countered and Puma shakes his finger as we’re at another standoff.

Rey changes the plan a bit with some kicks to the head but the sitout bulldog doesn’t work. The fans cheer for different area codes before Puma bends Rey around his shoulders for a modified torture rack. Rey is able to escape and send him outside for that sliding splash under the bottom rope. The West Coast Pop gets two and a big springboard tornado DDT gets the same for Rey.

Mysterio tries a top rope hurricanrana but gets muscled up into a series of rolling suplexes (variety pack) for two. With nothing else working, Puma takes him up top for a super Razor’s Edge but since there’s no way that can happen, Rey gives him a reverse super hurricanrana for a near fall of his own. They slug it out with the fans being split on who to cheer for in a good sign. Another sitout bulldog is countered into a huge Backstabber, followed by a Blue Thunder Bomb for two. That move can’t win anywhere.

The spinning kick to the head puts Rey in 619 position and Puma actually pulls off the move steal for a change. A 450 (not a 630 Striker) gets two and I feel like I’m in a math class. Puma gets two more off a fireman’s carry into a kick to the head and goes up top. With Striker saying it’s the I’m sorry, I love you moment, Puma misses the 630 and crashes down instead. Rey enziguris him into a 619 but Puma grabs the boots and spins him into a Tombstone. That’s countered as well into a reverse hurricanrana (I don’t think I’ve seen that before) to set up the 619 and a top rope West Coast Pop puts Puma away at 26:28.

Rating: A-. I’m ok with Puma winning here as it’s basically the end of Creed: Puma is the future but he’s still got work to do to be the luchador he wants to be. This was a sweet wrestling match and felt like a main event level match. Given the way the title match ended, this was absolutely the right call for the main event as it doesn’t leave a bad taste in your mouth to end the show.

Puma goes to leave but Rey says these are Puma’s people and leaves him to pose.

The announcers wrap it up but Pentagon hits Vampiro with the barbed wire bat and superkicks Striker (should have gotten a bigger pop). The bat is raked across Vampiro’s head for some blood before Pentagon hits him over the back (covered in a rather thick looking jacket) with the bat. They go inside where Pentagon licks the blood and kicks Vampiro hard in the head. Pentagon says he’s the new master and licks some more blood before kicking Vampiro in the face again.

We go outside and Dario Cueto is ARRESTED. The police van pulls away as Dario lifts his head up and smiles to end the season. No really, that’s the end of the season. No other stories are addressed and we’re out for another few months.

Overall Rating: B. On its own, this is a strong show with a very good main event, an acceptable World Title match and a good Trios Title match. The only bad match is less than five minutes and I can live with seeing Catrina getting a little more physical if I just have to. I like the way they changed things up by going with the dream match for the good ending instead of having the fans boo the show out of the building when Pentagon lost. That’s smart and a sign that someone knows what they’re doing instead of just going ahead with their plan and dealing with the fans hating it.

Unfortunately, this was more than just a regular show. As soon as last season’s finale ended, this became something everyone wanted to see. There was a huge set of expectations to go with this season and it made this finale a show with a lot additional weight on its shoulders. That’s where things took a bad hit here.

All season long there were stories built, be it the big ones like Dario having a master, Councilman Delgado and everyone talking about what a big deal this was. Then there were individual ones like Marty the Moth vs. Killshot, Aerostar being from the future or whatever else you want to name. At the end of it though, all we get is this one storyline development that seems more like a teaser than any major change.

A term I’ve seen used to describe this show is “more like a mid-season finale” and I really can’t disagree. At no point did this feel like some big conclusion. Instead was much more like a show where we come back in six weeks to see what they have next. I think a lot of that has to do with knowing a third season is guaranteed though as last year was kind of up in the air, meaning they had to pack a lot into the first finale.

Overall this season was kind of all over the place. It started off with Dario and Matanza having to get back to the Temple and focused on Mil Muertes and Catrina in power but that wrapped up pretty cleanly and was barely mentioned again. The titles started changing hands a lot more frequently to keep things moving but it never felt like there was a big moment coming at the end of the season like with Muertes’ inevitable title victory. It’s still a good season but it seems like it cracked under some of the pressure, which they’ll need to fix next time around.

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Lucha Underground
Date: May 25, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

Last week’s show was uh…..well not exactly up to Lucha Underground’s normal standards. It did however give us a big match for tonight as Cage will be challenging Chavo Guerrero Jr. for the Gift of the Gods Title which Cage has a legitimate claim towards. Other than that you almost never can tell what you’re going to get around here. Let’s get to it.

The recap looks at Cortez Castro/Joey Ryan as cops, the Trios Titles and Cage helping Chavo win the Gift of the Gods Title last week.

Pentagon Jr. is on his feet and looks ready to go back to the Temple but Vampiro says he isn’t ready. A quick wrench of his arm has Pentagon slowing back down but he still says no fear. Vampiro says Pentagon can return to the Temple, though he’s not ready to face the monster.

Some Marines are here in an always cool move.

Matt Striker gets a phone call from someone who asks if he wants to be famous.

Joey Ryan vs. Mascarita Sagrada

The fans are WAY into Mascarita’s entrance, though that might be due to Famous B. doing the announcing. Joey isn’t interested though and kicks Sagrada in the head to take over fast. Mascarita sends him to the floor for the flip dive but Joey throws Sagrada down again. This sets up a trade as Joey gives B. his sucker for a business card. Back in and Mascarita throws him down and scores with a moonsault. Famous B. offers the referee a business card so Sagrada can kick Joey low…..but that doesn’t work on him for reasons I won’t go into. A tornado DDT puts Mascarita away at 3:14.

Rating: D. Just a comedy match here as Famous B. continues to screw up Sagrada’s career, which wasn’t exactly doing much in Lucha Underground to begin with. Joey is over with the crowd though and that’s going to get him somewhere given where things are going with the undercover cop story.

Famous B. consoles Sagrada.

Taya video with her looking at herself in lingerie and then putting on a dress to beat up masked men. That’s one thing I’ll never get tired of around here: even the goons are luchadors.

King Cuerno is in his office (or whatever it is) talking about how Mil Muertes thought he was king of the jungle. He gets up and we see Muertes stood up in a glass coffin as Cuerno’s ultimate trophy. Well that’s a bit creepy.

Gift of the Gods Title: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Cage

Cage is challenging and drops Chavo at the bell before firing off clotheslines in the corner. Vampiro doesn’t buy Striker’s claims of Chavo being one of the best in the world pound for pound. Vampiro: “When? When he was born and there were no other babies around?” Chavo’s dive is plucked out of the air so Cage can drive him into the barricade a few times.

Back in and Chavo gets a headscissors to send Cage outside, followed by a suicide dive to actually put Cage in trouble. A middle rope cross body just goes badly but Cage bangs up his knee trying a moonsault. Chavo is smart enough to start in on the knee but Vampiro wants Chavo to kick him in the head instead. The champ goes to the top so Cage gets up for an apron superplex. Cage snaps off a sitout Alabama Slam for two, only to get caught in a tornado DDT for the same.

A Liger Kick doesn’t do much for Chavo as Cage just blasts him with a discus lariat. Chavo gets up top again and sunset bombs Cage down, followed by the Frog Splash for two. Three Amigos are countered into a suplex powerbomb (as in Cage lifts him up for a suplex and then slams him forward into a powerbomb). A buckle bomb sets up a STEINER SCREWDRIVER (I never thought I would see that move again but my goodness is still looks amazing) to give Cage the title at 8:05.

Rating: B-. This was much better than I was expecting as Chavo actually wrestled instead of running away like a coward. Cage continues to be what Ryback should have been and I can’t imagine WWE won’t bring him back at some point in the future. Above all else though, STEINER SCREWDRIVER!!!

Cage gets right to the point: he wants a title match next week.

Johnny Mundo has attacked Fenix and will be taking his place in the Trios Titles match alongside PJ Black and Jack Evans.

Cortez Castro and Joey Ryan raid Dario Cueto’s office and find some cash, which Joey steals. Mr. Cisco comes in and isn’t happy with not being invited to the robbery. This earns him an arrest as Joey holds a gun on him. Uh….on what charge?

Taya comes out to announce the replacement.

Trios Titles: Johnny Mundo/PJ Black/Jack Evans vs. Rey Mysterio Jr./Prince Puma/Dragon Azteca Jr.

Mundo’s team is challenging. Jack and Dragon get things going with Dragon scoring off an early dropkick. Some very loud chops have Jack in even more trouble and a dropkick sends him into the corner for the tag off to Black. Puma comes in as well but gets elbowed down for two. Mundo and Black double backdrop Puma for two until the Prince channels his inner Davey Richards by throwing Evans into a DDT from Black and grabbing a neckbreaker to make the partners hurt each other. I’ve never liked that before and I still don’t here.

The hot tag brings in Mysterio to clean house before Dragon’s legdrop and Puma’s springboard splash gets two on Mundo. Evans gets kicked in the face but he kicks Puma in the back to take over again. Mysterio comes back in to send Mundo outside, followed by a slingshot hurricanrana from Puma as this picks up in a hurry. Evans charges into a boot to the face but is still able to cartwheel into a kick to Azteca’s head.

This sets up what looked like a super hurricanrana to Dragon who would land in another hurricanrana on Black. It would have been an awesome spot if both halves of it hadn’t been at least somewhat botched. The 619 on Black sets up the 630 but Johnny pulls the referee out. Mundo isn’t done yet as he kicks Rey low, setting up a double superkick from Johnny and Taya. The other two champs are kicked low and a top rope double stomp into an AA on Azteca.

Black hits a brainbuster called the Wellness Policy (I’m not sure what to think about that one) as we have a second referee. Somehow Puma backflips out of a belly to back superplex and makes the tag to Dragon. Taya has the referee though as Johnny is caught in a sunset flip for two. The distraction lets Evans blast Dragon with a chair to give Johnny the pin and the titles at 10:50.

Rating: B. Good match here as they really fir in with the Lucha Underground mold for the most part. Just let everyone go insane and do high spots to pop the crowd and the rest will be just fine. I’m not wild on these titles changing hands so fast as there’s really not much of a story in sight for them, though Mundo with a title will be fine.

Overall Rating: B. This was a bounce back show as they set up the big showdown between Cage and Matanza while also advancing some of the background stories. At some point they need to actually have these things start coming together so it’s a good step to have something like this happen. It’s not a blow away show but I’m looking forward to seeing where this goes.

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Lucha Underground
Date: April 27, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

This is another one of those really big episodes as we have the finale of the Trios tournament which just happens to be for the Trios Titles with the champions defending. Other than that we have Cage vs. Johnny Mundo inside a cage for one of the Aztec Medallions. That should be enough for one show so let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on the two matches tonight, which might be the entire card.

Apparently both Matanza and Mil Muertes will be fine but they’ll be out for a bit.

Aztec Medallion: Cage vs. Johnny Mundo

Inside a cage. They start fast with Cage throwing him into the corner and handing Johnny a beating. Mundo can’t get over the top so Cage dropkicks him down for some posing. Cage sends him into the steel a few times before a torture rack neckbreaker (always a cool move) gets two. In a very unique move, Cage puts him face first on the middle rope before climbing to the top for an elevated Boston crab.

Johnny crotches him for a breather but Cage throws him around and climbs again. This time it’s Taya with some belt shots to the hands to slow him down, allowing Johnny to grab a top rope C4 for two. There’s something awesome about that move and this was no exception. Mundo laughs a lot but charges into something like a Rock Bottom out of the corner. Cage goes up top but takes too long, allowing Mundo to hit a super Moonlight Drive for two.

We haven’t heard from Taya in long enough now so here’s a kendo stick from under the ring. It doesn’t seem to matter though as Cage snaps off a wheelbarrow suplex and a buckle bomb, followed by a throwing powerbomb into the cage. Well that looked awesome. Cage goes up again but it’s Taya hitting him in the back with the stick, allowing Johnny to get in some shots of his own.

They’re only good for two though as Cage gets the stick away and just mauls Johnny for two. A discus lariat gets another near fall but here’s Taya climbing the cage (Striker: “Like Peter Parker trapped by the Fantastic Four.”) with a chair to knock Cage silly for two more. Even Johnny looks stunned by that near fall. With Cage down, Mundo climbs the side of the cage but misses the End of the World for a big crash.

Now it’s Taya hitting a high cross body to start a double team on Cage with a Magic Killer getting two. Taya pulls out some handcuffs but Cage is fast enough to cuff Taya to the ropes. Johnny chairs her by mistake and it’s all crashing down. A spinebuster drops Mundo and an over the shoulder piledriver onto the chair puts Johnny away at 13:38.

Rating: B+. I was digging the heck out of this with both guys looking awesome and Cage getting easily the biggest win of his career. This was basically a handicap match with Mundo looking awesome in defeat. I could easily see Cage becoming a top star around here, even though his character is kind of limited.

We’re about ready to start the Trios Titles match but here’s Dario Cueto to say that Angelico has been mysteriously injured, so Son of Havoc and Ivelisse will defend the titles for their team.

Trios Titles: Fenix/Jack Evans/PJ Black vs. Cortez Castro/Mr. Cisco/Joey Ryan vs. Prince Puma/Dragon Azteca Jr./Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Son of Havoc/Ivelisse

Elimination rules and Son of Havoc/Ivelisse are defending. Fenix, Cisco, Ivelisse and Rey start things off and this is going to be a mess to keep track of. No one can hit anything to start and it’s an early standoff. Ivelisse puts Rey down but gets kicked in the face by Ivelisse, only to walk into a powerslam from Cisco, earning himself a chant. It’s off to Black, Puma, Havoc and Castro for some more well choreographed stuff until Havoc gets two on Castro off a standing shooting star. There’s WAY too much stuff to call here.

Things settle down with Cortez giving Havoc a backbreaker so Cisco can come in with a slingshot legdrop for two. Dragon comes in and kicks Cisco in the head but Cortez gives Dragon the same thing. Havoc elbows Castro and Cisco down so it’s off to Joey vs. Ivelisse with Ryan actually getting the better of it by taking her outside. Now it’s time for the dives with Azteca hitting an insane set of twists, followed by Black taking out the pile.

Rey comes off the top onto everyone with Puma and Son of Havoc following with the same. Most of the dives didn’t come close to hitting but they looked awesome. Joey rubs his chest to break up Ivelisse’s dive so she slaps him in the face, followed by a release German suplex. Castro gets in a brainbuster on Ivelisse but won’t tag Joey in, allowing Ivelisse to roll Cortez up for the pin and an elimination to clear the ring out a bit.

We take a break and come back with Puma vs. Havoc vs. Evans in a threeway wristlock. Jack gets dropkicked down and Havoc adds a top rope double stomp to Puma’s back for two. It’s off to Ivelisse who charges into Evans’ boot but comes back with a loud chop. A quick Code Red gets two on Evans but Black comes in and turns the cover over to pin Ivelisse, guaranteeing new champions.

Back from another break with Dragon and Fenix staring each other down. Fenix blocks a roll through with a hard double stomp to the back, only to get flipped into the air for a tornado DDT in a VERY fast counter. Puma comes back in and hits something like a GTS to drop Black, setting up the 630. Evans kicked Puma low for the save but kicks his partners by mistake, allowing the hot tag to Rey for the real comeback. Well as much of a comeback as you’re going to get in lucha. The 619 sets up another tornado DDT to plant Evans, leaving Rey to add a moonsault for the pin and the titles at 23:15.

Rating: A-. This got WAY better after things settled down and was definitely entertaining though it would have been better with just three teams instead of four. Having Mysterio and company win the titles is definitely the best possible outcome as a win over them is going to feel like a huge deal. Azteca continues look awesome and the other two are more than proven so this whole thing worked very well with some awesome action and the great spots you would have expected coming in.

Vampiro, in full master mode, yells at Pentagon for being in a wheelchair. Pentagon can’t get up so Vampiro pours hot candle wax onto his back. He still can’t get up so Vampiro calls him weak to end the show.

Overall Rating: A. When else do you get two awesome matches with such minimal talking other than to announce Angelico missing? This was exactly the kind of high flying wrestling that you want to see when you watch Lucha Underground and we can get back to the main event stuff in the near future. Again though, this is the same formula that makes NXT work: have a few batches of stories people want to see that can rotate week to week so nothing gets stale. It works everywhere it’s tried and Lucha Underground is no exception.

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Lucha Underground
Date: March 30, 2016
Location: Lucha Underground Temple, Boyle Heights, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

It’s the start of part two of the season as Aztec Warfare is out of the way and we have a new star in Dario Cueto’s brother Matanza, who won the Lucha Underground Title last week. That means it’s time to start the long build towards Ultima Lucha, which could be one of the best shows of the year if they do it right. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week, along with the debut of Mariposa a few weeks back and the Disciples of Death losing the Trios Titles.

We have a house band back and Dario is walking around ringside. He’s glad to be back in charge in his temple and promises a new trios tournament starting next week. As for this week though, it’s time to find a new #1 contender to the Lucha Underground Title. This brings out Pentagon Jr. to say the only reason Matanza won was because he wasn’t in the match. Dario says Pentagon isn’t championship material so Dario gets choked and has his arm loaded up. That’s enough to earn Pentagon a title shot tonight, which is WAY sooner than it should be taking place.

Vampiro approves of Pentagon’s actions.

Taya/Johnny Mundo vs. Mr. Cisco/Cortez Castro

Castro and Taya get things going as this is a rare heel vs. heel match. A running boot to the face takes Taya down and a double bulldog gets two. Taya finally gets in a shot of her own and drags Cisco to the corner, where Johnny tags himself in. For some reason that annoys her, even though it seemed like she was going over for a tag in the first place. Johnny takes way too long to set up the End of the World and gets rolled up for two, followed by a neckbreaker from Cisco.

That’s enough for Johnny as he immediately tags Taya back in, only to have Cisco get in a DDT as everything breaks down. Cue Cage after that whole cinder block over the head last week. You know, because you can recover from that in a week. Cage is so mad that he just stands at ringside, leaving Taya to take the Psycho Realm (Shatter Machine, a 3D into a Codebreaker) for the pin at 4:41.

Rating: C-. This was an acceptable enough match as Johnny and Taya are showing dissension and we also get advancement of Cage vs. Mundo at the same time. Cisco and Cortez aren’t an entertaining team or anything but at least they got a win here to give them some credibility going forward.

Marty the Moth is sitting in a chair and reading a book while talking about people envying the moth tribe. They had a secret weapon in Mariposa though, who we see murdering various masked men. The Mariposa mask was passed down for generations and now it’s the most dangerous Mariposa of them all. As usual, this was an awesome video which made something as stupid as the warrior of the moth tribe sound terrifying.

Catrina teleports into Dario’s office (Dario: “I didn’t see you come in, but that’s kind of your thing isn’t it?”) and promises the death is coming for Matanza. Dario seems a bit shaken but still confident.

Trios Titles: Son of Havoc/Ivelisse/Angelico vs. Disciples of Death

The Disciples are challenging and this is an elimination match. Barrio Negro (sweet they have names again) starts with Angelico and they flip around a bit until Angelico armdrags him into an armbar. Havoc comes in with a top rope double stomp to the back and it’s already off to Ivelisse vs. another unnamed member of the team. Catrina offers a distraction and a kick to the face eliminates Ivelisse. I’m not a fan of the champs losing the first fall like that as it would be a title change in a regular match.

Havoc comes in and flips over Trece before it’s off to Angelico for a jumping knee to the face. Barrio gets a knee as well and the Fall of the Angels puts Trece away to tie it up. They keep right on going with Angelico hitting a great suicide dive at the same time Havoc takes out the other Disciple with an Asai moonsault. Back in and Sinestro (thanks for that Matt) drives to knees into Angelico’s back for the elimination, leaving us with Havoc vs. Barrio Negro/Sinestro.

Havoc drops them both with a double back elbow. A double cross body does the same and a standing moonsault gets rid of Negro to tie it at one. Sinestro kicks Havoc down but misses a moonsault, only to have Catrina break up the shooting star. Cue Ivelisse again to take care of Catrina so Havoc can dive onto Sinestro. Now the shooting star can connect to retain the titles at 9:20.

Rating: C+. Now that’s more like it. This was the kind of high flying match that it needed to be with all six flying all over the place and just doing cool stuff. Hopefully that’s it for this feud though as there’s no reason for them to keep going after the Disciples have lost twice in a row. Good match though and that’s what it needed to be.

Rey Mysterio is in Dario’s office and says he’s here because of Dragon Azteca. Dario liked seeing him in the ring last week but Rey is talking about Dragon Azteca Sr. He blames Matanza for Azteca’s death but Dario denies any involvement. They drink a toast to Azteca’s memory and that’s about it.

Mariposa vs. Sexy Star

Star bails to the floor to start but Marty throws her inside for some hard (ish) punches in the corner. Star’s Black Widow is easily broken up with a side slam, followed by a Vertebreaker of all things (the Butterfly Effect) for the pin on Star at 1:25. Nearly a total squash.

Post match Mack gets beaten down.

Dario Cueto holds the Lucha Underground Title and tells Matanza to break Pentagon’s back. The cage is opened and the champ is loose.

Lucha Underground Title: Pentagon Jr. vs. Matanza

Matanza is defending. Pentagon isn’t sure what to do with him to start so he goes with shots to the leg. A superkick only staggers the champ a bit and a backstabber has about the same effect. Matanza sends him outside and throws Pentagon into the crowd, followed by a whip into the barricade. Back in and a German suplex has Pentagon shaken and it’s the Wrath of the Gods (that reverse powerslam) to retain the title at 4:02.

Rating: D+. That’s exactly what this needed to be but I’m not sure on the idea of squashing Pentagon. My guess is that this leads to rebuilding him as a monster with Vampiro at his side, which could lead to a big rematch down the line. At least it was short, which really pushes Matanza as a monster to be dealt with.

Post match Vampiro gets in the ring to check on Pentagon but gets kicked in the head. Pentagon is powerbombed through the announcers’ table and taken out on a stretcher to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was a step down from Aztec Warfare but there was almost no way that wasn’t going to be the case. They had to do something to follow up on the show and setting up the potential for Pentagon to rise back up the card after being knocked down is a good idea, assuming that’s what they do of course. It’s not a great show or anything but as usual with Lucha Underground, you can come and go with ease and have fun.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: November 1, 2000
Location: Bren Events Center, Irvine, California
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Mark Madden, Tony Schiavone

We’re out of October and things are…..well they certainly exist. For a few more months at least. Scott Steiner is still insane and chasing Booker T.’s World Title but more importantly WCW has made it very clear that Mike Awesome, the athletic freak, has no future as a main event player. It’s a good thing they caught that problem before it became serious. Let’s get to it.

3 Count vs. Jung Dragons

There’s almost no way this can’t be good. It won’t mean anything but it should be entertaining at least. Shannon doesn’t seem to like Evan hogging the mic but this point is dropped as we see Leia from behind to make the announcers way too happy. They don’t even bother waiting on the dives this time with everyone going nuts to start.

Jamie-San accidentally takes out his partners though until things settle down to Shannon vs. Yang with the former dropping a nice backsplash. It’s off to Jamie who misses a springboard legdrop, allowing the tag to Evan. This is treated as a very sudden issue in the band because that’s how plot devices work in wrestling. Yang pokes Evan in the eyes before Jamie accidentally clotheslines his partner. A double flapjack puts Jamie down but Evan tags himself in to steal the pin.

Rating: C. I can always watch these guys do their high spots and the storyline breakup is fine, but stop hammering it in like this. Would it have killed you to set this up over the course of a few weeks? I know it would have cut into Jeff Jarrett calling people Slappy but it might have worked a little better than inventing it in one night.

As you might expect, after the match 3 Count throws Evan out and Leia ejects Jamie-San. Jamie’s mask is ripped off to reveal…..Jamie Noble, who isn’t a thing yet. Jamie and Evan look at each other, possibly setting up a third team. Why not at this point? It’s not like they’re doing anything else.

Nash and Palumbo say Stasiak couldn’t cut it, suggesting that he’s off the team. That’s not a bad idea actually.

Bam Bam Bigelow attacks Crowbar, who just happened to be standing there waiting while a camera was on him.

Elix Skipper vs. Lieutenant Loco

This is still fallout from the parody and has nothing to do with the Misfits getting back the US Title or Major Gunns. Loco starts fast with clotheslines and a dropkick because what else is a midcard cruiserweight supposed to do. A pumphandle suplex gets two on Skipper but the Matrix is enough to let him take Loco out to the floor.

We finally start flying around with Skipper hitting a corkscrew plancha, only to have Loco suplex him again inside. Gunns finally does something besides show off her shorts but gets caught trying a low blow. The distraction lets Skipper load up the ring which goes upside Loco’s head during a sunset flip to give Elix the easy pin.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have time to go anywhere but it’s cool to see Chavo getting better and better every week. Skipper still doesn’t quite get the finer points but he’s more than athletic enough to make up for it. If nothing else though, I’ll take a heel beating a face instead of doing all the insane and screwy stuff we’re used to around here.

Chuck Palumbo vs. Shawn Stasiak

Nash is on commentary of course and talks about how this is going to settle all of the issues in the Thrillers. Actually there’s no match as we cut to the back and see Palumbo out cold. Nash is ticked but Stasiak claims innocence.

Post break, Palumbo gets checked out while the rest of the Thrillers promise to take out Stasiak tonight.

Bigelow says he’s back and wants Goldberg, only to have Crowbar attack him for earlier.

Video on Goldberg vs. Bigelow. First, did anyone want to see Goldberg vs. Bigelow again? Second, how convenient that they had this ready at a moment’s notice.

Mayhem video.

Boogie Knights vs. Rey Mysterio/Kidman

Konnan is on commentary. Kidman and Wright get things going with a pretty sweet technical sequence that you would expect from these two. A nice headscissors sends Wright down and it’s off to the partners. For some reason Rey only throws a couple of kicks before it’s back to Kidman who gets beaten down in the corner. The Knights work him over for a bit as Konnan babbles in what is supposed to be English.

Some knees to the back have Kidman in trouble and it’s time for a surfboard. As usual that only lasts a few seconds so it’s off to an abdominal stretch for some additional time. Kidman hiptosses out after Disco gets caught holding Wright’s hand and it’s off to Rey as things speed up. Everything breaks down and Disco gets crotched in the corner, setting up the Bronco Buster. The Kid Crusher puts Wright away.

Rating: C. As not great as the booking has been, WCW has actually been putting together a very nice tag division around this time. You have the Thrillers on top and Kronik as the monsters with teams like these two filling in the extra time. Now you even have the three teams from the opener and the thing is really stacking up. Factor in the Harris Twins disappearing again and everyone wins.

Crowbar wants to fight Bigelow tonight. I thought we had covered that already.

Sgt. AWALL vs. Lance Storm

Actually never mind as Storm has found a replacement.

Sgt. AWALL vs. Meng

Of course it’s a brawl to start with only AWALL selling anything. Meng pounds him into the corner but gets taken down with a clothesline. For once Tony freaking out over this offense makes sense. A low blow stops AWALL again and it’s already time for a table. AWALL pops back up and chokeslams Meng through it for a big upset.

Storm yells at Meng post match and gets the Tongan Death Grip.

Vampiro and Jeff Jarrett are ready for the main event.

This week’s big interview is with Shawn Stasiak of all people because WCW has no idea what these things are supposed to be about. The interview is listed as from yesterday, which is either Sunday or Tuesday depending on how much you’re expected to listen to the commentary. Stasiak gets right to the point by talking about how he didn’t train at the Power Plant (thanks for finally acknowledging that) and was always the outcast. Nash may be a great talent (he is) but Stasiak doesn’t like this stuff from Palumbo.

This week on Thunder, there’s going to be a big surprise, which may or may not have been the attack which may or may not have been Stasiak in the first place. Stasiak wants to be the first former Thriller to be the World Champion. Given that none of them have yet, this isn’t impossible actually. Ignore the fact that Stasiak isn’t a wrestler anymore and hasn’t been for fourteen years or so.

Lance Storm vs. Norman Smiley

They better not screw this up. Storm can’t do his usual yelling so it’s National Anthem time. Storm starts with a full nelson for a nice series of reversals, capped off by the start of a Big Wiggle. Oh how I missed that one. Norman’s sunset flip sets off a pinfall reversal sequence before Storm gets in a hot shot to really take over. Storm starts in with his usual well done stuff, including a suplex and legsweep before having his leg lock broken up with ease. There’s something so cool about watching two guys who are this skilled on the mat trading holds.

Norman climbs the middle rope for a jumping back elbow and gets two off a rollup. That’s enough wrestling though because IT’S WIGGLE TIME. Storm gets two off a northern lights suplex and they hit the mat for even more fast counters. A piledriver doesn’t work as Smiley backdrops Storm off, only to get caught in the Maple Leaf for the submission out of nowhere.

Rating: B-. I’m a sucker for this kind of stuff as they kept it moving fast enough to avoid being boring but showed off a lot of technical stuff at the same time. It would be nice if this was setting up a match against someone Storm could work off of but why do that when we can have Hugh G. Rection instead? Also can we get Smiley some more TV time? Would that be asking too much?

Meng has to come out and break up the Maple Leaf. This would mean more if he hadn’t gotten pinned in two minutes earlier tonight.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Crowbar

Bigelow drives him into the corner and blasts Crowbar with a hard clothesline. If there’s one thing Bigelow can do, it’s hit smaller people very hard. They head outside for dueling whips into the barricade with Crowbar actually getting the better of it. Something like a DDT gets two on Bigelow but he pops back up for Greetings From Asbury Park and the fast pin.

Booker isn’t happy with never pinning Scott Steiner so he’s willing to have another rematch at Mayhem with Steiner getting to pick the stipulation.

Jeff Jarrett/Vampiro vs. Mike Awesome/Sting

Jarrett doesn’t get why Ric Flair has been named CEO when he’s the only one with the stroke around here. Of course it’s a brawl to start with Awesome throwing Vampiro over with a belly to belly while the other two fight on the floor. The pairings switch places with Sting getting the better of Jarrett off some right hands in the corner. Unfortunately the announcers make sure to bring up the Halloween Havoc match for reasons I’ll never understand.

Jarrett backtracks up the aisle before sneaking back in for a cheap shot on Sting as a tag match breaks out amid the fighting. A double back elbow gets two on Sting and Vampiro kicks him in the face for two. The announcers bring up Sting flying off the video screen a few months back as it occurs to me that Nitro and Thunder are shot very differently.

On Thunder, the camera is mostly from ringside instead of the standard hard camera. It actually makes the shows feel different, aside from the fact that nothing happens on Thunder. Jarrett slaps on the required sleeper until Sting breaks free and makes the tag to Mike. Everything breaks down and Sting uses the ball bat to block a guitar shot. The Awesome Bomb is enough to pin Vampiro a few seconds later. STRIKE UP THAT 70s ELEVATOR MUSIC!

Rating: C+. This was about as good as a main event tag is going to get at this point and that’s really not saying much. After Sunday’s disaster it’s clear that they need to go somewhere new with all four guys but here we are again combining two feuds that aren’t interesting in the first place. At least the Awesome vs. Vampiro match was good but Sting vs. Jarrett needs to stop now.

Overall Rating: C+. Definitely a better show for the most part here as you can (in theory at least) see where they’re going for Mayhem. I’m not wild on a lot of the booking but that’s almost always the case with WCW. The important thing here is a lot of the action was good and a higher standard than what WCW had most of the time. Much like TNA today, when they cut out the nonsense and just wrestle, the shows are MUCH easier to sit through.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: October 25, 2000
Location: Alltel Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray, Mike Tenay

It’s the final show before Halloween Havoc and hopefully Sting vs. Jeff Jarrett gets a little more time this week. This show is now being taped after Monday Nitro so there’s a chance that some of the guys might not be up to their usual speed. On top of that there’s the chance that WCW could manage to put on a show full of errors that could defy all logic and intelligence. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

The opening video focuses on the three big matches at Halloween Havoc. They’re building those up very well.

Hardcore Title: Reno vs. Kwee Wee

Reno is defending because this title is still a thing for reasons that I don’t quite get. Kwee Wee brings out pink garbage cans. Where would you get one of those? They start slugging it out with the trashcan lids with the champ getting the better of it and dropping a knee onto the lid onto Kwee Wee’s head. To sum up the value of the title, Stevie points out that Reno wasn’t brought to Australia for the two week tour. Yeah a champion wasn’t brought in for two weeks and I don’t think anyone noticed he was gone.

Kwee Wee tries to load up a table but gets hit in the face with a trashcan for his efforts. Well that’s what he deserves. They fight into the crowd but are quickly up to DJ Ran’s booth. I feel like I’m back up in 1999’s area. That goes nowhere so they come back to the ring where Paisley breaks up a Roll of the Dice. Not that it matters as Kwee Wee misses what looked like an elbow drop, setting up the Roll of the Dice to retain the title.

Rating: D. What do you want me to say here? One uninteresting guy beat up a slightly interesting guy with a bunch of nothing weapons shots as the announcers talked about how no one missed the Hardcore Champion being gone for over two weeks. This division needs to die in a hurry because it’s so uninteresting by now.

Post match Paisley gets a Roll of the Dice until AWOL (challenging for the title at the pay per view) comes out for the save.

Buff Bagwell insists that he and Stacy Keibler are just friends. He’s the stuff though.

Here are the Thrillers, minus Stasiak, with something to say. Problem #1 with the Thrillers: they’re picking Shawn Stasiak to turn face out of all the options they have. Nash calls the Thrillers the future and wants Stasiak out here right now. Shawn does as he’s told and says that Nash is like Bobby Knight, making him at least the second and probably twentieth person to make that comparison. Nash isn’t going to tolerate this and says that Shawn needs to assume the position for a cricket bat spanking. For some reason Stasiak does as he’s told again but Palumbo blocks the bat from connecting….and that’s that. Ok then.

Buff Bagwell vs. MI Smooth

Smooth is still a thing? Buff poses a lot to start so Smooth kicks him in the ribs. Now why has no one else ever thought to do that? Well apparently Buff has because Smooth makes the mistake of posing and gets kicked in the ribs as well. They keep up their slow offense with Buff avoiding a splash in the corner and hitting the double arm DDT. A Blockbuster puts Smooth away in a hurry.

David Flair comes in to go after Buff’s blood but eats a DDT.

Here’s the Cat with Miss Jones to challenge Mike Sanders to a mixed tag. “You can bring a woman or put one of the Thrillers in drag.” Well they’ve been humiliated enough times otherwise so why not. Sanders brings out Leia Meow and tells her she can either wrestle or lose her job.

The Cat/Ms. Jones vs. Mike Sanders/Leia Meow

The guys get things going and Cat kicks Sanders right in the face to knock him outside, meaning it’s already off to the women. To be fair, they’re more interesting than anything the men were going to do. Meow is annoyed at Mike though and rides him around while Cat puts a cup over Sanders’ face. Mike gets up for a sunset flip, earning him a shot to the face and a double pin from the women. This would be another match where they tried to be funny and failed about as hard as they could have.

Booker T. and Sting are ready for their six man tag tonight.

The big interview this week is with Goldberg, who spends a good deal of time sucking up to the Australian fans before moving on to talk about the Streak and Starrcade 1998. That brings us back to the new Streak and Goldberg knows how he’s going to beat Kronik. Of course he won’t tell us how he’s going to do that because he’d rather tell us how he regrets beating up David Flair, though it had to be done. Praise for everyone who has gotten him here and a plug for his book ends this mostly worthless interview.

Big Vito vs. Vampiro

This could be fun. They actually go to the mat to start with Vampiro getting the better of it (that’s not surprising) before just stopping to stare at the crowd. Vito doesn’t attack because he’s not an MI Smooth fan, meaning it’s time for a slugout with Vito getting the better of it (of course).

They head outside with Vito sending him into the barricade before dropping the top rope headbutt for two. It wasn’t quite a swan but maybe an ostrich with a bad limp. The top rope elbow gets the same and it’s off to a sleeper of all things. You don’t often see that on a heel. Vampiro fights out (because it was a sleeper) and gets in a spinwheel kick for two of his own. A legdrop gets the same for Vito but his top rope splash hits knees. The Nail in the Coffin puts Vito away.

Rating: C. Fine enough but Vito has fallen through the floor since Russo left. Vampiro was fine but he better lose to Awesome on Sunday if Awesome is getting a World Title match the next night on Nitro. Vito is fine in this jobbing role but right now they need new names. To be fair though, was anyone thinking that it was going to be Vito?

Lance Storm/Elix Skipper vs. Corporal Cajun/Lieutenant Loco

Storm is still ticked off about the parody which wasn’t very funny in the first place. Cajun starts with Storm and hits a reverse White Noise for no cover as Storm is right back up. Well so much for that. It’s off to Skipper who eats a clothesline, only to have Storm enziguri him from the apron.

Tenay’s big news of the match: Elix Skipper DID NOT play in the Canadian Football League. Remember when Mike did a five or six part documentary series on lucha libre? Now this is what we’re stuck with instead. A quick X Factor gets Cajun out of trouble and it’s a double tag to bring in Storm and Loco. Everything breaks down and Duggan has to be taken out by Rection and AWOL. Gunns accidentally hits Loco with the Canadian flag but Loco rolls through for a pin on Storm anyway.

Rating: D+. There were some decent spots in there but I’m so sick of seeing these teams fight. I can’t believe that The Gunns thing is even an issue anymore as they stopped trying to make her Canadian (and to make the male fans drool over her) a long time ago. Storm has lost almost all of his momentum, though a lot of that is due to fighting a guy named General Rection.

Jeff Jarrett and Kronik say they’ll win tonight.

Halloween Havoc video.

Disco Inferno vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Sean O’Haire

Same idea as Monday and there’s nothing wrong with that. O’Haire takes over with some big right hands before both smaller guys get in shots to the head through the ropes. Disco trips and pulls Sean to the floor for some posting before dropping Rey with a bulldog. Rey’s moonsault is caught in midair for a powerslam, only to have Disco get in a shot to take over again.

Disco can’t launch Rey high enough for a hurricanrana but it looks enough like a dropkick to work. Rey takes Disco to the floor with a hurricanrana as the partners start fighting outside. Kidman climbs the post to bulldog Disco but Rey dives on Jindrak instead of covering. Back inside and it’s Sean with the springboard Seanton Bomb on Disco for the pin.

Rating: C. This wasn’t as fun as the match on Monday but that’s due to having inferior talent here. I’m liking the idea of splitting up the triple threat tag match into two triple threat singles matches as it gives you something to keep the build going while not having any team actually lose. It’s almost like whoever is running this show has a better idea of how wrestling works without needing to use a lead pipe or whatever brilliant idea the writers have thought of this week.

Jeff Jarrett/Kronik vs. Goldberg/Booker T./Sting

Makes as much sense as any other main event they could put on. Jeff talks some basic trash before the match. Booker’s comeback is to tell Jeff to shut up because he isn’t the best talker in the world. Booker and Jarrett get things going with a couple of kicks putting the champion in early control. Goldberg comes in and gets to face Adams as Mike says the Streak can be broken if Goldberg gets pinned here. I can go with that.

A single right hand puts Adams down so it’s off to Sting vs. Clark with the painted one avoiding a knee in the corner. There’s a very early Deathlock but Adams makes a save. It’s already back to Booker who scores with a spinning forearm, only to eat a DDT. Jarrett comes in but takes a swinging neckbreaker to put both guys on the mat.

Booker is smart enough to tag in Goldberg and Sting at the same time as everything breaks down. Goldberg’s spear hits the post but he easily kicks out of Clark’s cover. High Times plants Goldberg but Sting comes in with a low blow. Seriously? That’s our hero? Scott Steiner comes out to go after Booker, allowing Sting to hit the Death Drop on Jarrett for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not bad here with the pace being kept up throughout and an actually clean(ish) pin. I’m not sure on having Sting pin Jarrett this close to a pay per view but you take what you can get where you can get it. At least Goldberg didn’t get to kick out of High Times just yet, though you know he’s going to no sell the thing on Sunday.

Post match Steiner hits Booker with the pipe, allowing the heels to destroy their upcoming opponents to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This could have been a lot worse but they’re doing a miserable job of setting up Halloween Havoc. Even after watching this show, I’m still not sure what the majority of the card is supposed to be or why I’m supposed to care. The three main events are fine enough but there’s a firm limit on how far those things can carry a show with a DNA match (whatever that is) on the card as well.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro #263
Date: October 23, 2000
Location: Alltel Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray, Mark Madden

We’re stateside again and it’s the go home show for Halloween Havoc which actually has a pretty solid looking card. Of course I don’t expect WCW to actually make that work but at least the build hasn’t been the worst. Unfortunately you never can tell what the final push for something like this is going to be. Let’s get to it.

We open with a montage of events from Australia.

Opening sequence.

Perfect Event vs. Harris Brothers

Kevin Nash is on commentary. Stasiak slugs away at Don to start and stomps away in the corner. The announcers are stunned that he’s doing anything right so Don clotheslines Shawn down to take over. Palumbo comes in and gets beaten down as well, only to run the corners to dropkick Don off the apron. At least that looked good. An ankle scissors out of the corner looks good as well but Palumbo gets in an argument with Stasiak so Shawn drops to the floor. The H Bomb ends Palumbo in a hurry.

Post match Nash gets in the ring so Stasiak gets in his face, only to have Nash drive him into the corner. No punches are thrown but Nash takes his hat off and gives Stasiak a serious look. Stasiak leaves so Nash gets on commentary again to promise tough love.

Mike Sanders is ready for his kickboxing match on Sunday and has a three round exhibition set up for tonight. This could go so many bad ways I don’t even know how to laugh at it.

Gene brings out Booker T. for a chat. Booker knows that people think he’s crazy but he’s out doing this for his fans and his family every single night. When he came down the ramp tonight, it was like a light bulb went off over his head because this is what it’s all about. Booker doesn’t think much of Scott Steiner and just like everyone else, Scott is going to have to kill him to take this title. Steiner better be ready to take a beating because Booker is going to have all these fans in his corner.

Cue Steiner and Midajah, hopefully to breathe some life into this thing. Steiner talks about Ebonics and welfare before saying Booker is only holding the title until Scott knocks him out. The brawl is on in the aisle but Jeff Jarrett jumps Booker from behind to put the champ down. There go the lights and it’s Sting with the save, probably setting up a main event. The locker room comes out to break it up, which always feels better than referees and goons. Awesome and Steiner point at each other a lot to tease something for later. This started slow but the pull apart brawl helped it a lot.

Post break, Steiner says he wants Awesome tonight and makes sheep noises.

Here’s Sanders in head gear for his kickboxing exhibition but first he says that he’s from Badstreet USA. The further down you go the worse it gets and he lives in the last house on the left. Thankfully the announcers are all over the Freebirds ripoff as the opponents are revealed as the Jung Dragons.

Before the match, Sanders puts something on his gloves before Jamie-San starts it like a wrestling match. A shot to the eyes blinds Jamie and a right hand is enough for the knockout. The same thing happens to Yang but Kaz gets in a few good shots, including sending Mike into the buckles a few times. That earns Kaz a shot to the eyes as well, setting up a kick for the third knockout. Leia Meow comes in for a low blow but Mike is wearing a cup. Sanders threatens her with the cup but here’s Ms. Jones to interrupt, allowing Cat to sneak in to KO Sanders. I’m not calling it a match but total waste of TV time.

Here’s Kronik to say that this thing with Goldberg started as business but now it’s personal. Goldberg may want the money but they’ve got a lot more to prove. If Goldberg wins, he beats two monsters and looks awesome. That’s not happening though because that’s not how it works in the real world. We’re not done yet though as Kronik has some new clients in 3 Count. Apparently they’ve hired Kronik to make sure no one interrupts their performance tonight. Clark doesn’t want to hear the music though so it’s time for a match.

Kronik vs. 3 Count

Well by match I mean a squash lasting 56 seconds before High Times puts Evan away.

Nash has a test for Stasiak tonight. In addition to that, Nash isn’t in a good mood tonight because Scott Hall received his walking papers last week. This Outsiders gimmick isn’t a work though so they’ll run again.

Here are the Misfits in Action dressed as Team Canada for the parody promo. Loco is the former 100 Ounces and Under Champion, AWOL, with his ten foot board, is Jigsaw Jim Jughead (Did the Clowns give him nickname lessons?) and Cajun makes a lot of lame Canada jokes, all of them capped off with an “eh?”. Loco goes on about being Wine Time and implies he was the water boy in the Canadian Football League. Rection finally ends this and says he’s taking the title and they’re taking Major Gunns back because that story is STILL going.

That 70s Guy hits on Pamela and would be glad to face Steiner tonight. Just let him be the monster that he’s perfect as instead of this goof. Thankfully he gets serious and promises to give Steiner a beating before he wins the title next week.

Here are Nash and the Thrillers with Kevin talking about the Outsiders again. They were a real team but Stasiak needs to learn the concept.

Goldberg vs. Shawn Stasiak

This is the test and it’s over in 40 seconds. We’re three matches in and have seen less than five minutes of wrestling.

Goldberg says he’ll take care of Kronik on Sunday.

Filthy Animals vs. Boogie Knights vs. O’Haire/Jindrak is official for Sunday. That could be good if they don’t make the champions look horrible again.

Billy Kidman vs. Alex Wright vs. Mark Jindrak

Before the match, Disco promises that he and Alex are launching an official investigation into finding out who let the dogs out. See, there are a lot of drunk drivers in Little Rock and Disco wants the dogs to be safe. Jindrak gets double teamed to start as Stevie picks Alex to win this. A German suplex gets two on Mark with Kidman making the save. That earns Kidman a torture rack neckbreaker but Alex dropkicks Mark for two more. Everything breaks down on the floor and Kidman gets launched into the ring and he grabs the Kid Crusher to put Alex away in another way too short match.

It’s a big brawl post match with the Animals clearing out the ring.

Crowbar, again in the 70s gear, hits on Pamela until Jimmy Hart comes in to say Crowbar has a match.

The announcers talk about the pay per view.

Video on David Flair going insane trying to find out who fathered Stacy Keibler’s baby.

Video on Sunday’s three big matches.

Vampiro vs. Crowbar

For some reason Vampiro has nunchucks and takes over very quickly with some hard shots. A hard whip into the barricade cuts off Crowbar’s comeback because the shots with a deadly weapon didn’t do enough damage. They get inside for the first time and chop it out as Madden calls Vampiro an angry Count Chockula. Crowbar comes back and sends Vampiro to the floor for the apron splash. With nothing else working, Crowbar drives his fingers into Vampiro’s eyes. Madden: “He’s not a bowling ball!”

Some good looking right hands knock Vampiro into the barricade and Crowbar drives him HARD into the steps. Vampiro actually suckers him in to take over again as the announcers try to figure out why this match is taking place. It’s very telling that the idea of “they’re fighting because the company put together a show instead of some authority figure” is unthinkable. Back in and Vampiro sends him flying with something like a belly to belly superplex to give the fans a sends of genuine excitement.

Crowbar starts no selling chair shots and pelts the chair at Vampiro to break up something off the ropes. Vampiro kicks the chair into Crowbar’s face for two but Crowbar crotches him off the ropes, setting up a slingshot flip legdrop onto the chair. They fight over to the DJ Ran booth (I’ll give you a minute to take in the fact that DJ Ran is still a thing in October 2000) where two druids set up a pair of tables. Crowbar fights off the druids but gets chokeslammed through the tables (Tony: “As only a vampire can!”) for the knockout win.

Rating: B+. This was a heck of a fight as these guys just beat the heck out of each other for nearly ten minutes. If there’s a better hidden gem in WCW than Crowbar I have no idea who he is because Crowbar continues to be awesome every time he’s in the ring. I had a really good time with this as they were giving it everything they had instead of doing anything resembling a match. On a side note, it’s really sad to get excited over a match nearly breaking ten minutes but it’s so rare for TV these days.

Post match Vampiro says this is all on Mike Awesome, who put him out two months ago. Vampiro wants to fight Mike this Sunday because that’s what Vampiro does best. Vampiro: “Be there or be square.”

Crowbar gets stretchered out.

Konnan vs. Shane Douglas

Actually hang on because Shane has a bad arm. Torrie has been a nervous, medicated wreck all week because her man can’t take care of her. Konnan offers her a facial and I’m going to hope you don’t know what that can mean. For some reason Shane keeps calling him Carlos but Konnan says he’s heard it’s a legitimate injury so they won’t fight.

Shane jumps him anyway but gets taken down onto the arm. Konnan slaps on a freaky submission where he wraps his leg around Shane’s head and cranks on the arm which is quickly released for no logical reason. The bad arm is sent into the steps, only to have Torrie slip in a chain. A left hand and the Franchiser put Konnan away quick to make sure that he looks even more worthless.

Scott Steiner vs. Mike Awesome

During the entrances, Tony offers his condolences on the passing of Yokozuna. However, Steiner cuts off the feelings by bringing out A TIGER. As in the tiger comes down to ringside and then leaves about five seconds later. I have no idea why that happened but it certainly got my attention. Booker comes out as a surprise commentator, or as much of a surprise as you can be while your video plays over Awesome’s music. Awesome takes over to start and gets two off a slingshot splash.

The Awesome Splash gets the same as Booker talks about wanting to face Mike next week. Midajah, in her five inch heels, comes in and kicks Awesome over the top. Back in and a suplex (not a fall away slam Tony) allows Steiner to do some pushups. Mike breaks up a superplex attempt and gets two off a top rope clothesline. The Awesome Bomb is loaded up but Midajah grabs the boot, allowing Steiner to get in a pipe shot. A top rope Angle Slam sets up the Recliner to put Awesome away. There’s your #1 contender people.

Rating: D+. This is a case of the horrible booking overtaking the decent action. Of all the people they have in this company they had to job the guy who is getting a guaranteed World Title match in a week? There was NO ONE else around? Like, Sting for instance? He and Jarrett didn’t get any real focus tonight so why not have Jarrett do the distraction so Steiner can beat him and set up two things at once? Too logical I guess but it would have been better than Awesome losing here.

Booker looks a little scared to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. You really can feel the lack of Russo’s influence around this time as you can understand the stories throughout the show and even get some decent action in there. Unfortunately you also get five matches that add up to about nine minutes of wrestling. There comes a point where you just need some good wrestling and I really can’t imagine that’s going to be the case at the pay per view. They’re on the right track but they need a lot of effort to make this whole thing work again.

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Monday Nitro #258
Date: September 18, 2000
Location: Dom Cardillo Arena, Kitchner, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Mark Madden, Tony Schiavone

We’re past Fall Brawl and the big story is Booker getting the World Title back. It’s pretty clear that Scott Steiner is the next big challenger after his big win over Goldberg in one of WCW’s better matches of the year. The sad part is the match wasn’t even that great but WCW has gone so far down hill in match quality that it’s the best they can do. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Rey Mysterio/Tygress vs. Natural Born Thrillers

That would be Jindrak/O’Haire/Palumbo/Stasiak (on commentary)/Sanders and this is still under elimination rules as we’re continuing last night’s match where it left off. Mysterio kicks Jindrak down to start but Mark grabs a fireman’s carry neckbreaker before bringing in O’Haire for a sitout powerbomb. For some reason Mark feels the need to hold Rey down for the Seanton Bomb, which hits Jindrak by mistake. That sets up a double pin with Tygress pinning Jindrak and Rey pinning O’Haire at the same time.

Stasiak pops up off commentary and crotches Rey so Palumbo can jump on his back. Palumbo plants Rey with a lifting sitout Pedigree (nice move actually) as Kwee Wee comes out and hits Stasiak with a chair, allowing Tygress to pin Stasiak at the same time Palumbo pins Rey. Geez people stop with the double pins. Why would the referee even count those things? So it’s Palumbo/Sanders vs. Tygress so it should be interesting to see how lame they can make the Thrillers look here.

The referee shoves Palumbo into a rollup for the pin so it’s one on one. Sanders slowly takes his shirt off so Tygress grabs a sleeper, only to get snapmared down. Rey springboards back in with a dropkick to set up a Stuff Buster (X-Factor with a lot of gyrations) for the final pin (with more gyrations).

Rating: F. What the heck was that? You just had Tygress and Rey Mysterio pin the Natural Born Thrillers in five minutes for the sake of what? A storyline that involves Paul Orndorff who wasn’t actually in the arena that night? That’s their best idea? Tygress gets some pins, Rey gets some pins, and the Thrillers look like bigger goofs than usual? So much for whatever momentum this company had from last night.

Kevin Nash is sitting in the back and says the Thrillers need a coach. Of course he has nothing to say about losing the title last night because, as we’ve established over the years, the World Title means nothing to Kevin Nash.

Post break, Nash has apparently been accepted as the Thrillers’ coach. His game plan for the night winds up spelling out YOU SUCK.

Stills of Booker winning the title and Steiner vs. Goldberg from last night.

We go to the back for Goldberg’s entrance but it’s Vince Russo instead because of course it is. Yeah it’s not Steiner getting this entrance but Russo, because he’s the real winner you see. Russo gets lost in the back because his sense of direction is overshadowed by his MANLINESS. We get a MANLY walk down the aisle as Russo does Goldberg’s poses before pulling out a registered letter. The letter, addressed to Mr. Russo your honor SIR, is from Goldberg which says he’s unworthy of working for someone like Vince Russo.

Goldberg has failed the fans over and over and is clearly a total disgrace and loser, so therefore he resigns from WCW. On top of that, all the children should be looking up to Russo, just like Goldberg is now. Russo finally calls out Steiner and praises him for getting rid of Goldberg once and for all.

Steiner rants about how awesome he is and how he won the battle of the monsters last night. All he wanted to do was beat Goldberg up so he owes the fans an apology for ruining his career. This draws a GOLDBERG SUCKS chant but Steiner cuts it off by saying he wants the World Title. Therefore, next week, he’s guaranteeing that he’s the next World Champion. It doesn’t matter who wins tonight because he’ll beat Sting or Booker for the title. Russo doesn’t think so but here’s Jeff Jarrett before he can elaborate.

Sting didn’t beat him on Thunder so Jarrett deserves the title shot. Before that goes anywhere, Russo cuts them off because HE is the boss with all the power around here. Now it’s Nash coming out to say that he should have the first title shot and the fans seem pleased. For some reason this means a tag match with the winner getting a title shot next week. It’s going to be Steiner/Jarrett vs. Nash/…..Russo, who has wanted to be WCW World Champion his whole life, because he deserves to be champion. The shocked look on Nash’s face makes me want a Super Shredder spinoff movie.

Post break Steiner and Jarrett say this can’t happen. Wouldn’t they want this to happen?

Torrie Wilson/Shane Douglas vs. Kwee Wee/Paisley

This is the result of an open challenge from Shane. Allegedly this is a mixed tag but for some reason only Paisley is on the apron. Kwee Wee gets two off an early clothesline as Torrie (in a racecar themed outfit for some reason) jumps up to the apron, only to get kissed by her non-partner. Shane grabs the Franchiser for two because Paisley wants to fight Torrie. Instead Shane fakes a tag to Torrie and Franchises Paisley for the pin with a five count for no logical reason.

Post break, Russo is telling Nash his plan (it involves getting heat and a hot tag) but Nash gets the chalk and writes BITE ME.

Booker and Sting get in a fight in the back before their match tonight.

Disqo is in Cat’s office….and he has a duck. Apparently Disqo thinks Cat sucks as Commissioner and wants his job. Cat: “YOU’RE RUNNING AROUND WITH A BLOW UP GOOSE!” A match is made for Disqo getting to be Commissioner for a day, but if he loses then Rey and Juvy are stripped of the Tag Team Titles.

Disqo vs. The Cat

Before I can retype the stipulations, Cat kicks him in the face for the pin, meaning Rey and Juvy lose the titles.

The Animals run Disqo off.

Nash says he’s out of the tag match so Steiner and Jarrett can work it out themselves.

Disqo bails.

We see Mike Tenay’s interview with David Flair where Flair beats up the mailman.

MI Smooth is in the ring and calls out David for a chat. Apparently Smooth knows something about the father of the baby if the price is right. This brings out David with a crowbar but Smooth calms him down. Smooth has a video tape that shows who the father is. David pays but beats Smooth down with the crowbar instead.

Russo suggests Kronik for the tag match but gets yelled at for his efforts.

David makes a guy play the tape because he can’t go buy a VCR.

Terry Taylor sends Mike Sanders to see Russo, who sends Sanders to take a tape to Kronik.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Sting

Booker is defending but Sting drives him into the corner to start. A clothesline puts the champ down, only to have him pop up with a side kick. The Death Drop is countered into a Bookend attempt but Sting reverses into a Fujiwara Armbar of all things. The Deathlock is loaded up but here’s Jarrett for the DQ because of course it’s Jarrett.

Steiner comes in to help with the beatdown, including a guitar shot to Sting. The heels put on matching submission holds.

Sanders gives Kronik the tape. That would be the audio tape because there are two tapes running around at the moment.

Jimmy Hart tells David that there’s a VCR in Smooth’s limo. That earns him another beating.

Kronik has heard the tape and freaks out because it was Jarrett and Steiner insulting them earlier. Russo makes a match for later.

Here’s Team Canada with Storm bragging about last night’s success before introducing Jim Duggan as the newest member. Duggan has cut his hair and shaved his face, making him look almost unrecognizable. He’s tired of fighting for a country that takes him for granted and treats him like garbage. When he fought Goldberg and was taken away in an ambulance, all he heard was a GOLDBERG chant. Now it’s all about Jim Duggan (or Dude Love, as this is the same promo that he used to turn heel after Wrestlemania XVI). Cue the Misfits and it’s time for a six man.

Misfits in Action vs. Team Canada

The Misfits, heels here, clear the ring to start as the fans tell them that they suck. Loco sends Rection into the corner for a splash to Skipper, followed by a running clothesline from Cajun. Storm comes in for some misdirection, allowing the tag off to Duggan. The retired guy that is. A-Wall chokeslams Skipper through the table as Rection comes in to clean house. Everything breaks down and Duggan hits Rection with the board (fine with the referee) for the pin.

Rating: D+. The wrestling wasn’t bad actually and the story is there, but the problem lies in the main character. Who in the world wants to see Jim Duggan as anything more than a comedy goof, let alone as one of the more important heels in the midcard? It’s a decent enough story, but not with Duggan involved.

Post match Duggan hits Rection in the knee with the board.

Steiner and Jarrett yell at Russo.

Mike Awesome and Gary Coleman arrive with Gary freaking out over getting beaten down last night. Why did he ride with Awesome then? Vampiro and the Clowns approach the empty bus.

Kronik vs. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner

Never mind of course as Nash and the Thrillers come out first with the former insulting Kronik. Sanders and Johnny are chosen to go out and beat up Kronik with predictable results. More Thrillers come out until it’s just O’Haire and Jindrak remaining for what could be an interesting match. Naturally that doesn’t happen as Steiner and Jarrett come in with a pipe, followed by the Stroke for the pin.

Russo goes to someone’s dressing room.

Vampiro and the Clowns have spray painted the bus.

Russo comes in to see Sting (thank goodness there was a camera in there already) and asks him to be the partner tonight. Apparently people have been saying Sting doesn’t have it anymore so it’s SHOWTIME FOLKS.

There’s going to be a swimsuit contest next week to crown Miss WCW. Howard Stern’s Wack Pack will be the judges. You can see it coming from here.

Mike Awesome comes out to rant about Vampiro and the Clowns making it very hard for him to be happy. Therefore, he wants a hardcore match with Vampiro RIGHT NOW.

Vampiro vs. Mike Awesome

Vampiro pounds away with the kendo stick to start but Awesome sends him to the floor for the big dive. They head into the crowd with Vampiro diving off a wall, drawing a badly censored chant. Back to ringside for some cookie sheets, which Tony thinks is worse because it’s industrial size. Vampiro’s superplex is broken up and Awesome scores with a top rope clothesline, only to get hit in the head with a trashcan. An Awesome Bomb through at able at ringside puts Vampiro away.

Rating: D+. Decent hardcore brawl here but it’s more sad than anything else. Awesome is far better than this due to athleticism alone but he’s stuck in some humorous gimmick, which likely exists for the sake of giving the writers something to laugh at. Oh and why is there a Hardcore Champion if we’re having hardcore matches like this with the title never being mentioned?

Booker goes in to see Russo, which freaks the boss out.

David has seen the tape and storms off to find Stacy.

Sting/Vince Russo vs. Jeff Jarrett/Scott Steiner

Booker comes out instead of Russo, giving us something like the fourth different combination for this match. Whoever gets the fall gets the title shot next week, so I’m assuming Booker is off next week if he gets the pin. It’s a brawl to start with Sting getting two off a top rope splash.

There’s the Deathlock on Jarrett but Midajah hits Booker with the pipe. Cue Miss Jones to pull Midajah out and slam her as a tag match breaks out. It’s Booker playing Ricky Morton for a bit and it’s Jeff slapping on a sleeper. Booker finally fights up with a suplex to break things up, allowing the hot tag to Sting. Normally that wouldn’t make sense but Booker really doesn’t have anything to lose here.

Everything breaks down again and cue Kronik to go after Jarrett. Steiner kicks Booker low and puts on the Recliner but here comes Russo, looking like he’s been destroyed. Scott goes after Russo, allowing Booker to hit Steiner in the face with the bat. Booker puts Russo on top of Steiner for the pin and the title shot as the rules of this match are thrown out even further.

Rating: D. As usual, this could have been a nice tag match had they actually let us see a tag match but instead it was a big mess with so many storylines going on at once that it was hard to keep track of. The problem boils down to the fact that you could have the same match without Kronik but they’re thrown in there just because. When something can be taken away with no changes to the story, it’s unnecessary.

Overall Rating: F+. This was one of your run of the mill Russo shows with a lack of character motivation (Nash not seeming interested in wanting the title back), WAY too much Russo and a main event that kept changing over and over. It’s really not much of a draw to tell me to keep watching so I can find out who is teaming with Vince Russo in a match where he might become #1 contender for a match next week. There wasn’t a lot of wrestling here either, which would have cut down on the need for all the backstage stuff, though again that’s standard Russo. Not a good show here but it’s only going to get worse.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: September 6, 2000
Location: Reed Arena, College Station, Texas
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray

We’re getting closer to Fall Brawl and we’re now past the big waste of time known as WarGames 2000. In theory that means it’s time to crank up the storylines but who knows what that could mean around here. To be fair though Thunder was actually a really good show last week so maybe I have some hope here. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

MI Smooth takes the Natural Born Thrillers to the Power Plant.

Kwee Wee vs. Lieutenant Loco

This has potential and is a #1 contenders match. Before they can get anything going, here are Elix Skipper and Major Gunns for commentary. Kwee Wee grabs a slam to start and stomps Chavo in the corner before throwing him down with a quick suplex. That’s fine with Chavo as he comes back with a quick brainbuster but can’t get the tornado DDT. They’re flying through this. Instead he shoves Kwee Wee away, only to get crotched by Paisley, allowing Kwee Wee to drop him with a hanging DDT for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C. As usual, letting the wrestlers wrestle is the best idea they can have around here. Kwee Wee is still working hard in the ring but there’s no way around this stupid gimmick. I mean, what is he supposed to do with a gimmick that is destined to stay a goofy comedy guy instead of anything serious?

Post match the three women (Tygress as the third) get in a fight, only to have Skipper pull Gunns away before the MIA can save her.

The announcers talk about the history between Goldberg and Bret Hart. I don’t know if WCW knew that Hart wasn’t going to be able to get in the ring again but this is pretty close to false advertising by implying that this was leading to a match.

The sitdown interview is with David Flair and Miss Hancock before their wedding on Monday. It’s about time they built that thing up.

We go back to the Power Plant with the Thrillers returning to their old stomping grounds. They offer to give the guys in the ring some training but Mike Graham actually gets Sanders in a Figure Four. The beatdown is on and the Thrillers leave them laying. A guy cleaning the floor gets beaten up too and it’s time for the big showdown with Paul Orndorff. They let themselves into his office and Paul tries to throw them out to no avail. Orndorff asks what happened to them but the Thrillers beat him down as well. Security finally breaks it up but this did its job.

It’s time for the sitdown interview with David Flair and Miss Hancock. Tenay gets right to the point by asking if Ric will be there. Didn’t we cover that on Monday with Arn? David hasn’t talked to his family but they’re welcome to come if they like. Mike calls Hancock a gold digger (she was reaching into David’s pockets for something) before asking if David will be a better father than Ric. They argue over whether that’s personal or not (it kind of is Mike) and that’s it. Mike gives them six months at most. So Gene’s gimmick is that he’s a dirty old man and Tenay’s is that he’s just a jerk while doing interviews? How does this help anything?

Goldberg is looking for Hart.

Clip from before Nitro of the Harris Twins beating Kronik down in a bar.

Kronik vs. 3 Count

Well last week the Dragons were beaten down so I guess it’s 3 Count’s turn. The band calls out the big guys and the beating is quickly on. Helms gets in a quick superkick on Clark but Karagias eats the full nelson slam. Not that it matters as the Harris Twins appear, drawing Kronik up the ramp for a countout. After destroying 3 Count of course.

Post match Tank Abbott comes out and pummels 3 Count to make sure they get nothing out of this show.

Bret is here and has security guarding his locker room. Smart.

Crowbar says he’s ready for Troy Martin (Shane Douglas). Again I ask: how does this help anything? Yeah that’s his real name and how does that make me want to see their match any more?

It’s time to make things even worse as we have the debut of the Lava Lamp Lounge, as in Mike Awesome’s 70s themed talk show. Apparently he isn’t just into fat chicks anymore because there’s enough Vitamin A to go around. His guest tonight: Paula Pamshock (exactly as he said it).

As expected Awesome hits on her with some of the worst lines you’ve ever heard until Jeff Jarrett comes out for the interruption. Jarrett: “You look like a cross between John Travolta in Saturday Night Live and Austin Powers.” That might be worse than Paula Pamshock. It’s the big brawl with the set being destroyed but Okerlund runs out to save Pamela from the guitar shot, which takes Awesome out instead. Predictable but fine, save for the horrible screwing up lines.

Crowbar vs. Shane Douglas

Now remember: real names were used so this is a big deal. Before the match, Shane rips on Goldberg because that’s still supposed to be a thing. Crowbar has taped ribs so Shane goes after them before the bell, only to get punched and bitten in the corner. A baseball slide sends Shane to the floor and Crowbar, with the bad ribs, does his splash off the apron. Maybe it’s because he’s crazy?

Shane gets smart and sends Crowbar ribs first into the barricade a few times before throwing on an abdominal stretch back inside. The hold is broken as quickly as most other abdominal stretches are after 1958 and Crowbar starts whipping him with a belt. The northern lights suplex and Death Valley Driver get two each on Shane but Crowbar goes after Torrie (for interfering) and walks into the Franchiser for the pin.

Rating: D. This could have been good had Crowbar remembered he had bad ribs to start and if I didn’t have to listen to Shane doing his really weak heel stuff before the match. I’m really not sure what they’re going for with Shane at the moment as the feud with Kidman hasn’t been mentioned in a week, though I’m sure it’s supposed to be a big enough deal that we just go with it.

Post match Daffney comes out to brawl with Torrie. Ozzy (the boyfriend) comes out but gets beaten down by Shane. This brings out Madusa of all people to drop Shane with an enziguri.

Goldberg beats up the security guards and there’s no Bret inside.

Here’s Bret with something to say. He wants to know what happened to wrestling with people like Mike Awesome being wasted in stuff like that segment he was just in. Vince Russo has the stroke around here but everyone knows he’s the best in the world. Bret has beaten everyone in the WWF and now he’s beaten everyone here too, including Goldberg. The only person that ever gave him a chance was Vince Russo, who gave him title shots the second he got here.

We see the Bret Killer Kick from Starrcade, which cost him millions of dollars. “I couldn’t even buy that ranch I wanted.” Goldberg claims to be some kind of animal activist but he treated Bret worse than any animal. Cue Goldberg to say if this was the normal version of him, he’d have already taken Bret’s head off. Believe it or not, he has some remorse. There are times where he wishes it was him that got his head kicked off. Bret wishes that every day because all Goldberg cares about is his merchandise being on the shelf.

Goldberg says he was doing his job but every night he has to wonder. When Goldberg was growing up, Bret was one of the people he looked up to. Goldberg is 34 here so the timing doesn’t work here, but he tries to leave because Bret isn’t worth it anymore. Bret says Goldberg isn’t the real thing and that’s enough to get him back in the ring. Cue Scott Steiner with a pipe to lay Goldberg out and put him in the Recliner.

WCW Motorsports, with Vampiro completely out of character.

Steiner leaves the building.

Tag Team Titles: Filthy Animals vs. Harris Brothers

The Brothers are challenging while Konnan/Disqo do commentary. Juvy starts fast with a springboard dropkick to we’ll say Ron before it’s off to Don for some no selling and power beating. A sideslam gets two and it’s already Juvy in trouble. It’s back to Ron (like it matters) who gets kicked in the face and taken down by a springboard bulldog.

Rey finally gets the tag as everything breaks down, including Tygress coming in for a Bronco Buster. Juvy gets kicked low but here’s Kronik because we didn’t have enough interference yet. Kronik lays out Disqo for no apparent reason before Clark throws Rey at one of the Brothers for the pin to retain.

Rating: D. I’d still love to hear the pitch meeting where the Harris Brothers got jobs for so long. Was there really any good reason to go with the other than they’re big and look alike? I’m really not sure what the appeal is of them looking alike as they wrestle the same style anyway. At least with a team like the Usos you get something entertaining more often than not. The Harris Brothers are just big generic power guys who happen to be identical. That warrants employment for some reason.

Video on WarGames, which means the whole show.

After the show, Booker and his friends/family promised to get the title back at Fall Brawl. Cool moment, which is why it wasn’t on Nitro but Russo got to talk about 18 times.

Video on Sting vs. Vampiro, which is continuing for whatever reason.

Sting vs. Vampiro

Anything goes and we’re getting the Clowns on commentary to make this show so much better. The Clowns introduce themselves and offer “Tony Zimbabwe” three dollars to shill for JCW. This is also NOT for the JCW Title because Sting hasn’t beaten Mad Man Pondo. They head outside to start with Vampiro sending him into the barricade before taking it into the crowd.

We get the usual punching and walking until Sting takes it back to ringside for a whip into the barricade of his own. Sting goes face first into the announcers’ table so J can get in a right hand to the head. The Iranian Judo Attack (a clothesline) puts Sting down but he pops up and sends the Clowns running away. A lame chair to the head drops Vampiro and they head back inside as the Clowns freak out that Tony has lost his coloring book.

Vampiro comes back with chops but we might have some stolen food stamps. The Olive Loaf Chop staggers Sting but he slams Vampiro off the top for a comeback. Vampiro starts in on the leg (with the Saline Sam Coconut Crunch Lock) before kicking Sting in the face. There’s the Stinger Splash but but Shaggy throws the JCW Title at Sting’s leg. Not that it matters as the Death Drop knocks Vampiro silly for the pin. However, JCW rules say the loser wins and $5 of your ticket cost will go into Violent J’s pockets.

Rating: D+. The commentary was absolutely hilarious and the wrestling was really just there as a backdrop. The Clowns may not be the best wrestlers in the world (or really even close) but at leas they’re good for something around here. I really wish we could get past this Sting vs. Vampiro nonsense, but what in the world could they have for either guy next?

Post match Sting gets beaten down until Great Muta makes the save.

Goldberg is in the ring and calls out Bret Hart for a fight right here. Instead he gets Team Canada because they’re all the same right?

Team Canada vs. Goldberg

Goldberg yawns through the Canadian national anthem and the Canadians argue over who has to start. Storm throws Skipper at Goldberg and it’s a spear to the Cruiserweight Champion in about ten seconds. There goes Storm up the ramp but General Rection cuts him off. Back in and the spear into the Jackhammer ends Storm with ease. So much for the titles meaning anything around here.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a story heavy show but not in the stupid way that Nitro tends to go. I can live with a show that focuses on talking and setting up things for later, but it really doesn’t matter if the stories don’t have the chance to go anywhere when every Monday gets more and more insane. We’ve actually reached the point where Thunder is the bright spot in WCW and I’m not sure how to handle that.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro #254
Date: August 21, 2000
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Wichita, Kansas
Attendance: 5,211
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Stevie Ray

Dang we’re flying through August. I’m not sure why but it feels like this month is going by faster than any has in months. Maybe I’m just talking about this because I don’t want to talk about what’s going on in WCW at the moment. We’re almost up to Fall Brawl and the main feud is still Booker T. vs. Kevin Nash. Let’s get to it.

Two notes before we get to the show. First of all, of the 5,200 people here, about 3,000 were comped. Second, there was a house show two nights before this show in Sioux City, Iowa. The show’s main event: Stevie Ray vs. Jeff Jarrett. I don’t know if that’s a regular main event for WCW at this point, but add it to the list of reasons this company is on its last legs.

We open with a recap of Russo’s shoot from last week where he wanted to fire Goldberg. Thankfully this turns into a video about Goldberg beating up a bunch of people instead. As in something people might want to watch.

Russo is on the phone with Scott Steiner, who he promises that tonight is the night. Jeff Jarrett comes in and says they need to get rid of Goldberg. Russo assures him that it’s going to work.

We see a clip of Team Canada being awesome on Thunder.

Cruiserweight Title: Elix Skipper vs. Lieutenant Loco

Skipper is defending and Lance Storm is on commentary. Rection is outside as well and starts a USA chant to get things going. They start fast (likely due to having almost no time) with Loco uppercutting the champ into the corner. A belly to back suplex looks to set up an early frog splash but Lance breaks it up with a flag shot. Rection and Storm start brawling at ringside as Skipper brings in a chair, only to have it quickly taken away. That’s the point though as Elix slips on his Grey Cup ring to knock Loco out for the pin.

We cut to the back less than five seconds after the pin to see Goldberg arriving.

Russo is on the phone with Scott and asks if he’s ready. For some reason we cut to another camera shot of Steiner saying he’s ready. Why was that camera set up?

Here’s Russo with a bunch of security and something to say. Russo talks about wanting to get off TV but they keep pulling him back in. And wouldn’t you know it, they brought him right back into one of the show’s top stories. Right now his problem is Goldberg, who runs through the crowd to take out security. Since Russo is MANLY though, Goldberg isn’t allowed to touch him due to the contract.

Therefore, Russo has an offer Goldberg can’t refuse. He pulls out a release for Goldberg which will include full payment of his contract and he can show up next Monday anywhere he wants. The papers are quickly ripped up so Russo runs his mouth even more, talking about how Jarrett, Nash and Steiner all want a piece of Goldberg tonight. Russo brings up Goldberg’s girlfriend (Beth, though I doubt I’m going to remember that) and that’s enough for Goldberg to snap. Steiner pops up on screen and he breaks into a hotel room. We see Goldberg’s girlfriend freaking out so Goldberg runs off, naturally leaving Russo posing in the ring.

Wait we’re not done yet though as Booker T. comes out to deal with Russo. You know, because so many people want to. Booker wants Russo to tell Nash that he’ll be waiting all night for the big man. Russo is NO ONE’S delivery service though because Russo made Booker. Booker was at the bottom of WCW, where Russo thinks he should still be.

So wait, is this the real Russo or was it the real Russo when he said Booker deserved to be in the main event at Bash at the Beach? Or am I just stupid for trying to figure all this out? Anyway, Booker kicks him down and gets in an ax kick for one of the few times you’ll see Russo take a beating.

Goldberg rides off on his motorcycle.

Russo yells at the Natural Born Thrillers (now with shirts) and gives Palumbo the World Title shot if Nash isn’t here on time.

Corporal Cajun/Major Gunns vs. Paisley/Kwee Wee

So Papaya is officially gone. Paisley shoves Gunns off the apron to start and Gunns…stares. Ok then. The guys start (thank goodness) with Cajun getting two off a right hand. It’s off to Gunns for one off a middle rope sunset flip before tagging Cajun back in. Paisley comes in to stand in the corner so Cajun can catapult Kwee Wee into her. Everything breaks down and the women are of course horrible. Cajun launches Gunns off the middle rope into a cross body for the pin. The guys were watchable at best and they were definitely the better part. Oh and the wrong music plays when the Misfits win.

The losers beat down the winners post match.

Russo tells Steiner to be ready for Goldberg.

Here are Tank and 3 Count to sing Tank’s new song (including lyrics about tearing out your spleen and chewing on your bladder) but Tank thinks the band screwed up. Tank goes to leave but Vampiro and the Insane Clown Posse come out to beat all four of them down. Vampiro says this is the Dark Carnival and says Juggalo Championship Wrestling is officially taking over. He holds up the JCW Title, which is somehow still around in 2016. Vampiro rants about politics and promises that he’s just getting started with Steve Borden. Tank gets back in to clear the ring out and wants a JCW Title match tonight.

Here are the Natural Born Thrillers (minus Palumbo, who is getting ready) for their debut promo. Sanders gets the mic (thank goodness) and talks about spending the last two years watching the A-list stars draw below average ratings. There’s a man at the Power Plant who has been treating them like like garbage. Sanders introduces the team and says Palumbo is going to be champion by the end of the night. Opportunity has been knocking and they’re going to give the kids someone to look up to, the men a reason to get into the gym and the women a fantasy for every night.

Cue the Filthy Animals (because Russo LOVES faction wars) with Konnan saying he thought Tank Abbott’s promos were bad. Konnan rants about them never paying any dues and having no experience in this sport. They’ve never held a title or worked at this a day in their life. Konnan’s verdict: they ain’t got it like that.

Natural Born Thrillers vs. Filthy Animals

Konnan is the odd man out and it’s O’Haire/Jindrak/Sanders in the ring. Stasiak and Konnan are on commentary (talking about Stasiak’s pet gorilla) as Rey fires off rights and lefts at Jindrak. Konnan says the Tag Team Titles are on the line here but for some reason I don’t think that’s accurate. A tilt-a-whirl slam takes Jindrak down as Konnan wants to know how Stasiak hurt his knee when he just stands in the corner and poses.

It’s off to Disqo for an elbow drop as I’m trying to figure out when the Animals turned face. Madden says this is better than watching a bunch of old guys, which Konnan refers to a traveling wax museum doing a legdrop a clothesline and posing. O’Haire and Sanders double team Disqo down to take over before it’s Jindrak coming in with a springboard clothesline. A quick Russian legsweep takes Mark down (Disqo was always totally watchable in the ring) and it’s off to Juvy with a springboard spinwheel kick.

Juvy takes Mark down with a middle rope hurricanrana and it’s time for Rey, who is quickly crotched to change control again. Konnan ribs on the Natural Born Thrillers name in a funny bit as Sanders launches Rey into an O’Haire powerslam for two. A sick Batista bomb gets two more on Rey with Disqo having to make the save.

Rey takes Mark down with a headscissors and the hot tag brings in Juvy to clean house. Disqo DDT’s Jindrak and it’s Bronco Busters all around. Tygress hits one of her own so Konnan can debut FACE FULL OF STUFF. Everything breaks down until it’s Sanders debuting the 3.0 (Randy Orton’s backbreaker) for the pin on Disqo.

Rating: B-. Probably high but I have to take what I can get on these shows. Above all else this got some time (a bit over eight minutes, an eternity on Nitro) and the match was able to go somewhere. Konnan was actually really good on commentary here and made me want to see the Animals win and was making me laugh at the same time. This is the kind of match that WCW needed to have a lot more of, but you would have to be crazy to think any of these guys were getting past the Tag Team Titles, which is where so many of WCW’s problems came from: the introduction was good but it never materialized.

We see Goldb….oh wait make sure to keep the camera on O’Haire hitting the Seanton bomb on Tygress. Ok we’ve got the violence on the woman in so now we can go to see Goldberg arrive at the hotel.

Tygress is helped to the back.

Palumbo is getting the shot tonight because Nash just isn’t here. Well at least they’re finally going somewhere with the “they’re always late” idea.

WCW World Title: Booker T. vs. Chuck Palumbo

Booker is defending and oh sweet Russo is guest referee (naturally not even selling the beatdown from earlier). The champ works on a hammerlock to start and drops him with a quick Harlem side kick. A suplex drops Palumbo but Booker tweaks his knee again. Booker rolls him up for no count and yeah we’re doing this gem again. Palumbo gets in a shot for a very fast two and fires off some of those awesome right hands.

Booker’s sunset flip out of the corner gets Russo crawling around but stopping before one. A powerslam gets a fast near fall but Booker blasts him with a spinning forearm. The champ grabs a flapjack and Spinaroonis up, only to have the Thrillers hit the ring. Reno Rolls the Dice on Booker until Vito runs out with the stickball bat for the save. Now it’s Nash coming in with a chair to Booker’s head for a fast counted three from Booker.

Oh of course not as the Cat comes out to say Eric Bischoff made him the Commissioner and Russo is the writer. That means they’re equal (HUH?) so this match isn’t over. Wouldn’t that mean he’s overriding Russo which doesn’t work if they’re equal? The Thrillers are ejected and Booker is still officially champion because the match never ended. Booker wants to keep the match going so Cat appoints himself as referee. Good thing he had a referee shirt under his regular shirt (of course) as Russo takes over on commentary. Booker does his quick finishing sequence and retains with the Book End.

Rating: D. I lost track of what I was watching here. In other words, it’s another one of WCW’s major problems at this point: things going so fast that you can barely keep track of the match, let alone the show. It also brings up the question of why was Nash late, because apparently he arrived in between the start of the match and the four minute mark, which is quite the lucky timing. Anyway, Palumbo was trying but there was WAY too much going on to showcase anyone.

Goldberg is almost at the room! Seriously that’s how Tony put it.

Post break Goldberg gets in the ring and finds a note on the mirror saying they’re back at the arena. So it’s another movie episode.

JCW Title: Tank Abbott vs. Vampiro

Vampiro is defending and the Insane Clown Posse has taken over commentary, in whatever their over the top characters are of course. One of them dubs Tank “Pink Rabbit” and the other calls him “Hank Sandwich.” I’m not a fan of the Clowns but I remember their commentary being some of the funniest stuff I had ever heard. Vampiro kicks “Frank Rabbit’s” leg as the announcers try to figure out what Tank’s leg is made of. Tank punches the referee by mistake and then goes after Vampiro, drawing the Clowns into the ring. Muta comes in and mists Tank but 3 Count runs in for the save as this is thrown out.

Scott Steiner drags Goldberg’s girlfriend into the arena. As usual, women in a Russo promotion are helpless.

Russo gives Vito a match with Nash tonight.

Hardcore Title: Kronik vs. Norman Smiley

Smiley is the reluctant champion and asked for this match. Adams is in street clothes (I don’t want to see that street) so he sits in on commentary while Clark is left alone in the ring. Smiley, who wants to lose the title, starts swinging a kendo stick until Clark takes it away. I think you can figure out what’s going to happen next so I’ll let you put the pieces together yourself.

Clark kicks a trashcan into his face so Smiley goes outside and slaps Adams. That earns Norman a full nelson slam from Adams and the Meltdown from Clark as we’re just waiting on the Harris Twins. Adams goes to get a table (and finds smoke under the ring for some reason) before sitting back on commentary as the Twins come in and lay out Kronik with a chain. An H Bomb through a table retains Norman’s title, much to his chagrin.

Rating: F. It’s rare that a TV show gives me more than one match where I don’t know what to say but Russo has pulled it off. The match was just a backdrop for the comedy angle and another run-in to set up a match that almost no one wants to see. Kronik needed to get out of the tag division but the Harris Twins were the best opponents they could get? What did I do to get stuck with this?

Cat tells Lance Storm that Carl Oulette’s work visa has been denied so Storm is defending the US Title in a tag match against Mike Awesome and General Rection. Storm’s partner is a surprise. Oh dear.

Steiner tells Goldberg’s girlfriend that she’s a pawn.

Vito goes on a rant about how Russo isn’t his friend but tonight he’s going to fight the biggest guy in WCW.

Kevin Nash vs. Big Vito

Nash pounds him into the corner to start because Vito has been getting a very moderate push tonight so we need to crush him before it gets out of hand. There’s the boot choke but Vito escapes Snake Eyes and scores with the Mafia kick. A suplex and legdrop get two on Nash but he comes right back with a bit boot and side slam for two. Now Snake Eyes works and a chokeslam gets two. The straps go down and Nash scores with the Jackknife, only to have Booker come in (with his music playing for all of a second and a half) for the DQ.

Rating: D. As usual Nash doesn’t let anyone get in anything significant on him, though at least the Mafia kick got to make contact. You knew Vito wasn’t going to win here because he’s a main eventer though and Vito is in his early 30s. Nothing to see here as usual but at least Booker got in a shot on Nash.

Vito won’t get medical attention. I’m guessing that’s his rub.

US Title: Lance Storm/??? vs. General Rection/Mike Awesome

Storm is defending and whoever gets the pin gets the title. The Canadian flag comes out and Storm gets in some shots at the fans, only to be cut off by Jeff Jarrett’s music. Rection and Awesome get no music for reasons that aren’t clear. The production staff is way off tonight. Rection knocks Storm into the corner to start before dropping him with a gorilla press. Jeff is smart enough to kick Rection in the back, allowing Storm to nail a superkick to take over.

Jarrett breaks up a cover by Storm as the match is already getting too confusing. Rection misses a top rope elbow but Awesome tags himself in as everything breaks down. A big powerbomb puts Storm down with Jeff having to make a save, leaving Rection to hit No Laughing Matter on the champ. Cue Skipper to make a save of his own and Jeff adds a guitar shot to Mike (which might have been meant for Storm) to let Lance retain the title.

Rating: D. Another match with a bunch of stuff crammed into less than four minutes, meaning there was almost no way to catch everything. That just should not happen in a match this short, even if it was designed to set up a feud with Awesome vs. Jarrett and continue the Rection vs. Storm feud, which really isn’t of note anyway.

Steiner drags the girlfriend to the ring because she’s there to make men look dominant and powerful. Scott rants about how Goldberg started this before calling her a rather bad name for a woman as well as ugly. Goldberg slowly walks out until Jarrett hits him in the back with a chair. The villains double team Goldberg as the girlfriend watches in fear. Booker tries to make a save but Nash comes in. Goldberg fights back until Rick Steiner runs out with a pipe to put Goldberg down. They handcuff him in the corner and Steiner puts the girlfriend in the Recliner right in front of Goldberg to end the show (two minutes before the hour).

Overall Rating: D-. It takes a lot to make me uncomfortable watching wrestling. When you’ve been watching for nearly thirty years, you really do think you’ve seen everything. However, the way Russo books women on his shows are actually making me cringe. From what I can count, the following women were on this show: Beth, Major Gunns, Paisley and Tygress. Here’s what happened to them:

Major Gunns – Nothing

Tygress – Seanton bomb

Paisley – Splashed by Kwee Wee

Beth – Kidnapped, called an ugly b**** and put in the Steiner Recliner

Keep in mind that Goldberg vs. Steiner is happening because Goldberg (at least off camera) put Midajah through a table. Assuming you believe the plans that were only abandoned because the company went under, Russo was going to get to be announced as the father of Miss Hancock’s baby (no word on whether it would have been consensual).

Watching these shows is like some weird therapy as Russo tries to work out his horrible issues with women. On these shows, women are regularly beaten up, treated like garbage, jump from one man to another (Paisley), breaking a man’s heart because she doesn’t get that he’s crazy about her (Crowbar), or put in mud matches. This stuff keeps happening and it’s getting more and more disturbing to watch almost every single week.

Other than that though, this show was your usual borderline disaster with the stories feeling more like a straight to video movie and the wrestling ranging from not bad to barely worth the time. The baseline problem of this show continues to be having too much going on, leaving little time to actually build anything up. The Thrillers are a nice idea but there’s no reason to believe they’re going anywhere long term. It’s fine to see them get pushed though, even it it means nothing. Bad show overall, even with the talent trying its hardest to shine through.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of Wrestlemania at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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