Smackdown – August 15, 2008: The One Good Thing

Smackdown
Date: August 15, 2008
Location: Scope, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

It’s the final show before Summerslam and the big story around here is Edge finally snapping on Vickie Guerrero. That should make for the main focus around here, but it would be nice to have Undertaker acknowledged a bit more. HHH vs. Great Khali needs the attention more, but that might not go so smoothly. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge attacking La Familia last week.

Opening sequence.

US Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Benjamin is defending. Feeling out process to start until Benjamin’s headlock is countered into an early rollup attempt. The Twist Of Fate attempt is blocked, with JR mocking himself for getting the name wrong. Benjamin stomps away in the corner and we hit the early chinlock. Hardy fights up and knocks him into the corner for the slingshot dropkick and a near fall.

We take a break and come back with Hardy holding a headscissors on the mat of all things. Benjamin slips out and hits a knee to the face for two, followed by a nasty buckle bomb to knock Hardy silly for two more. We hit the half crab with a foot in Hardy’s back, meaning some groaning ensues. That’s broken up as well so Benjamin knees him in the back of the head and hits an Angle Slam for another two.

Back up and the Dragon Whip (that looked great) connects for another near fall, meaning frustration is setting in. Hardy fights up again and hits his jawbreaker to start the comeback. A middle rope Whisper In The Wind (you don’t see that version very often) gives Hardy two but the Twist Of Fate is countered into a backbreaker to give Benjamin a breather. Benjamin sends him to the apron and tries a sunset bomb but Hardy reverses into a hurricanrana. Back in and the Swanton is loaded up…and here is MVP to shove Hardy off for the DQ.

Rating: B-. This was getting going after a slow start, which had me worried as there have been some dull matches around here lately. You could see MVP coming, which was kind of the point, but dang there is something to be said about seeing Hardy make a comeback like that. He’s always been great at making you believe something is going to happen and that is what he was doing again here.

Post match MVP goes after Hardy again but kicks Benjamin by mistake. That lets Hardy get the Twist Of Fate into a Swanton, followed by a Swanton to Benjamin as well.

Victoria of all people comes in to see Vickie Guerrero, who is worried about Edge and Undertaker. Both of them are here and Vickie doesn’t want to be left alone.

Natalya/Maryse vs. Michelle McCool/Maria

Maria and Maryse start things off, meaning a lot of staring until Maryse trips her down. Natalya comes in and gets headlocked out of the corner without much effort. A side slam out of the corner plants Maria but she fights over for the tag to McCool. House is cleaned in a hurry, including a running flipping neckbreaker for two on Natalya. A Maryse distraction doesn’t work so she tries it again, allowing Natalya to get a quick rollup for the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here but the ending should set up a title match down the line. That’s better than what you are going to see on occasion so this could have been worse. Natalya is a natural for the first big challenge to McCool and is a better choice than Maryse right now. It wasn’t a good match, but it did accomplish something.

The Brian Kendrick vs. Scotty Goldman

Before the match Kendrick, with Ezekiel Jackson, says that yeah he has Big Zeke with him, but who brings more to the table than him? Zeke: “No one.” Kendrick wrestles for himself and you’re looking at the future. Goldman is making his debut and gets an insert interview….where he is confused about being in a box while coming to the ring at the same time. Kendrick cranks on the arm to start as JR can’t remember to put in a “The” before Kendrick’s name.

Goldman manages a quick takedown but gets kicked in the face twice in a row for his efforts. A camel clutch of all things has Goldman in trouble but he fights out and gets some boots up in the corner. Back up and a flying hip attack gives Goldman two but Kendrick sends him into the corner. Kendrick scores with the Kendrick for the pin. Goldman got a nice reaction here, which might have something to do with being better known as Colt Cabana.

Post match Jackson runs Goldman over.

HHH is asked about the violence that happened last week at the hands of the Great Khali. Kenny Dykstra of all people interrupts and says he doesn’t think HHH still has it. HHH says Dykstra is picking the wrong time and a match seems implied.

Here is Great Khali, with Runjin Singh, for a chat. Khali apparently says HHH is great but he is greater. HHH needs to get out while he can because devastation is coming.

HHH vs. Kenny Dykstra

Non-title and Runjin Singh is on commentary. Dykstra starts fast and hammers away but gets taken down by a clothesline. The spinebuster connects as JR is far more fired up than he probably should be for a match like this. The Pedigree finishes Dykstra fast.

Post match HHH and Khali stare at each other until HHH grabs Singh. Violence is threatened until Khali gets in the ring for the brawl. HHH can’t Pedigree him but he can clothesline him out to the floor to stand almost as tall.

Big Show vs. Ryan Braddock

This is Braddock’s entrance and he gets his own entrance. Show wastes no time in throwing him outside as commentary puts over Show’s size. Back in and the chop in the corner sets up a cobra clutch throw as Braddock is in trouble. The KO Punch finishes for Show rather quickly.

MVP is livid at Jeff Hardy for attacking him earlier tonight and promises to make him feel worse at Summerslam.

Vickie Guerrero rants to Victoria about Edge and asks her for help to her limo.

We get another R-Truth video, where he talks about sitting in jail and realizing he needed to change his life.

Victoria wheels Vickie Guerrero to her limo…where Edge is in the backseat. Edge scares Victoria off and puts Vickie in her wheelchair for a ride…to h***. And off they go.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Festus

Jesse is here with Festus, who freaks out at the bell as usual. Festus wastes no time in knocking Kozlov to the floor, which is the first time he’s ever been in anything resembling trouble. Kozlov gets in a shot to the ribs though and sends Festus into the steps. A headbutt gets two and Kozlov grabs a bearhug. Festus gets suplexed down and Kozlov puts on a waistlock. That’s broken up and Festus hits a clothesline, followed by a kick to the face. Not that it matters as Kozlov cuts him off with the big headbutt for the win.

Rating: C+. They were getting into a hoss fight here before the fast ending. Beating Festus means something for Kozlov as he actually had to work for it for a change, but he’s still only so interesting. Kozlov isn’t exactly an in-depth character and that doesn’t give me much promise about his long term prospects.

Video on John Cena vs. Batista.

Summerslam rundown.

Edge wheels a screaming Vickie Guerrero through the back and seems to tease hurting her. The ride doesn’t end until they get to the ring. The graphic says next, but how do they know that’s where Edge is going? It ends at the ring. How do they know he’s not going to take her out for a hearty lobster dinner first?

Here are Edge and Vickie (after a video on Shawn Michaels, which was “next”, not these two, again showing that WWE needs to pay better attention to their own shows) for the end of the ride. Edge dumps her on the floor and sits next to her, saying this is a rough patch like any other marriage. It wasn’t that long ago that they exchanged vows and said for better or for worse.

We see a video on the last few weeks, with Edge cheating on Vickie and getting put in the Cell match with Undertaker as a result. Mick Foley tried to awaken the old Edge, earning himself one heck of a beating. Back in the arena, Edge orders Vickie to apologize to undertaker, which she does, causing Edge to call her pathetic. She caused all of this and Edge feels like he is burning in h***.

This Sunday, Edge is going to make Undertaker burn with him, but why wait? Edge says that just like their marriage, the match with Undertaker is til death do them part. He kneels on Vickie’s chest to end the show after a heck of a promo that made it feel like the Edge of old. It’s hard to believe he has a chance on Sunday, but they’re making it a lot better.

Overall Rating: C+. As has been the case on Raw, it’s pretty clear that Smackdown is a one match show for Summerslam. The Undertaker vs. Edge match is the only noteworthy thing, which says a lot when it’s more about Edge vs. Vickie. HHH vs. Great Khali doesn’t feel overly important and that leaves MVP vs. Jeff Hardy in third place. This show had its good parts with pretty much everything Edge related, but that and a pretty good Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin match isn’t enough to make this show great.

 

 

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Smackdown – August 8, 2008: He’s Doing It Himself

Smackdown
Date: August 8, 2008
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

We are just over a week away from Summerslam and Edge is hopefully getting back on track. That is something he has been needing for a bit and it might have happened last week. In another thing that needs to pick up the pace, we have HHH vs. Great Khali for the former’s World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Edge snapping on Mick Foley last week.

Opening sequence.

Tazz is filling in for the injured Mick Foley. Commentary runs down the card.

Maryse/Natalya/Victoria vs. Maria/Michelle McCool/Cherry

They’re all in various Olympic sports attire, though Maria picks skiing for the summer games. McCool (volleyball) and Natalya (equestrian) start things off with McCool gabbing a Russian legsweep. A middle rope wristdrag takes Natalya down but Maria tags herself in for a double shoulder. Natalya sends Maria outside but Cherry (boxing) comes in with a double arm DDT. It’s off to Victoria for the Widow’s Peak, only for McCool to kick her in the face. Everything breaks down and Natalya Sharpshooters Maria for the fast win. This was a mini theme match and you can pretty easily get the reason why.

Bam Neely has been attacked and there is a black rose near him.

Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins vs. Shannon Moore/Jimmy Wang Yang

Non-title. Hawkins headlocks Yang to start but gets armdragged into an armbar. Back up and Hawkins fights out of the corner and hits a reverse clothesline, allowing Ryder to come in for a swinging neckbreaker. Hawkins comes in off a blind tag and breaks up a sunset flip, setting up a suplex for two on Yang. We hit the reverse chinlock but Yang slips out and hands it back to Moore to clean house. A high crossbody gets two on Ryder but the referee has to get rid of Yang, allowing a double inverted DDT to finish Moore.

Rating: C+. I’ve long since thought Yang and Moore could have been a bigger deal in the tag division as it isn’t like there was much competition. They had a nice match here and it made for a good use of a few minutes. If nothing else, it made the champions look good, which is always a nice move.

MVP wants to face Jeff Hardy at Summerslam. We see a clip of MVP costing Jeff Hardy a match against Edge on Saturday Night’s Main Event, but where is the footage of Hardy attacking MVP? Hardy is a product of his own actions.

Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Benjamin takes him down without much trouble and grabs an early chinlock. Hardy fights up and it’s an armdrag into an armbar as they already see to be filling time. That’s broken up and Benjamin stomps away in the corner before going back to the chinlock. This one doesn’t last as long as Hardy fights up and hits the mule kick out to the floor, where the slingshot dive connects. Back in and a quick Swanton attempt misses to give Benjamin two and we take a break.

We come back with Benjamin grabbing another chinlock, though at least his legs are facing another way to make it different. Back up and Hardy tries the Whisper In The Wind, only to get dropped hard onto the ropes for two. Benjamin starts in on the leg as Tazz talks about fatigue setting in. From what? Excessive chinlock usage? Benjamin starts cranking on the leg, including a half crab for a change.

That’s broken up so Benjamin puts it on again as we’re seeing quite the repetitive theme emerging. Hardy escapes again and they go outside, where Benjamin gets kicked out of the air. Back in and the Whisper In The Wind connects, only for Benjamin to reverse the slingshot dropkick into a powerslam for two. Paydirt is countered into the Twist Of Fate and Hardy hits the Swanton…but gets kicked in the face by MVP for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This got going near the end but they easily could have cut off about five minutes o the chinlocks and leg cranking. The latter wouldn’t have made much of a difference as Hardy’s leg looked fine when he was making his comeback. This wasn’t quite as bad as some of the recent dull matches, but it was definitely following a similar formula.

La Familia can’t find Zack Ryder and something might have happened to him.

And now, arm wrestling between HHH and Great Khali, with broken glass on the table for whichever hand goes down. Before we get going, Khali says something, which HHH says is a good point, even though he has no idea what Khali said. Runjin Singh says Khali told him to get out while he can because this is a different kind of challenge. HHH tells Singh to find a lamp to rub to put Khali back inside.

The reality is Khali has never been in the ring with someone like HHH, who is actually going to tell Khali his plans in advance. HHH is going to break Khali’s legs and there is nothing Singh or the jolly genie can do about it. With that out of the way, we’re ready to go and believe it or not, HHH is about to win when Khali attacks him. The head vice leaves HHH laying and commentary isn’t sure how he is going to survive at Summerslam. This was every step you would have expected, probably right down to the genie jokes.

Curt Hawkins has been attacked and there is another black rose.

We get another R-Truth video, talking about where he came from and showing him playing basketball with his friends. If you want to play the game, you have to get into it, and that is the truth.

Chavo Guerrero thinks he and Vickie Guerrero need Edge’s help to deal with this so he’s off to find him.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jesse

Jesse, with Festus, is the better competition that Kozlov requested. The bell rings so Kozlov bails from the crazed Festus before kicking Jesse down to take over. Headbutts and a suplex have Jesse in trouble but he gets in a shot of his own. Kozlov then headbutts him out of the air for the pin.

Raw Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

Chavo Guerrero found Edge and he is willing to help with Undertaker’s attacks, but Vickie Guerrero has to be civil.

Brian Kendrick vs. Super Crazy

Before the match, Kendrick brags about his power and introduces his bodyguard, Ezekiel Jackson (now with a last name). Kendrick knocks him into the corner to start and a dropkick puts Crazy down again. Back up and Crazy misses a charge into the corner so another dropkick can connect for two.

The camel clutch goes on as Tazz makes insect comparisons. Kendrick kicks him down again and grabs something like a seated abdominal stretch. That’s broken up as Tazz wonders why Crazy, a Smackdown wrestler, is wearing an ECW shirt. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Kendrick down and a standing moonsault gets two. Jackson offers a distraction though, allowing Kendrick to hit the Kendrick for the pin.

Rating: C. Crazy was starting to fight back when he got cut off through the pretty stereotypical means. Kendrick continues to look and feel different while making me want to se more of what he’s doing. That’s a great sign and it was another fine performance, even if it didn’t have much time.

Post match Jackson torture racks Crazy.

Edge comes in to see the Guerreros and says he and Vickie can get by this. As the head of the family, Edge has a plan but it has to be his way. Vickie agrees so they head to the ring, where, after a break, Edge calls Undertaker out and even demands he use the powers. Edge then grabs a chair and cracks Chavo in the back, setting up a Conchairto. Edge turns Vickie’s wheelchair over and says he is who Vickie needs to worry about. Undertaker needs to worry about Edge taking him to h***, but he’s taking La Familia with him. Especially Vickie. Nice little twist there as Edge continues to be built back up before Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C. As has been the case lately, the wrestling wasn’t great but the other stuff didn’t bail it out here. The arm wrestling stuff went on forever and while the Edge surprise as the end was nice, it only got them so far. They need to get to Summerslam now, but they also need something better than HHH vs. Khali as a secondary match. Not the worst show, but Edge continues to carry this thing on his back.

 

 

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Smackdown – August 1, 2008: He Has A Plan

Smackdown
Date: August 1, 2008
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

Things have gotten more interesting around here as Vickie Guerrero seems to be rather vengeful after Edge cheated on her. As a result, Edge is now set for a Hell In A Cell match against the Undertaker at Summerslam, which cannot end well for him. Other than that, HHH is set to defend the World Title against the Great Khali. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge apologizing to Vickie Guerrero but getting sent to the Cell anyway.

Opening sequence.

Here is Jeff Hardy to watch the first match as we’re told that he is facing Edge at Saturday Night’s Main Event. This is noteworthy as other than the Jenny McCarthy stuff, the show has not been mentioned in the slightest.

MVP vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

MVP comes out first and is announced as “coming to the ring to face Jimmy Wang Yang”, which isn’t something you often hear. Before the match, MVP mocks Hardy for never being WWE Champion because of his risky behavior. MVP wastes no time in knocking Yang down and then faceplants him without much trouble. The double underhook crank goes on, allowing MVP to yell at Hardy a bit more. Yang fights up and strikes away, including a running spinwheel kick in the corner. MVP is right back with a gutbuster though and the Drive By finishes.

Post match Hardy gets in the ring and tells MVP to never mention his family or dog again. The ensuing brawl goes to Hardy.

Chavo Guerrero isn’t sure who the surprise guest on the Cutting Edge is tonight but he and Vickie Guerrero run into Alicia Fox. JR: “What is the wedding planner still doing here?”

Mr. Kennedy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. The bell rings and Kennedy gets in another name shout, as is his custom. Benjamin takes him down but gets chased to the floor for a bit of a surprised reaction. Back in and Kennedy starts in on the arm but Benjamin drives him into the corner to break that up. Kennedy gets in a knee to put Benjamin down and goes back to the arm. The armbar keeps Benjamin down before Kennedy kicks him in the face. Back up and Kennedy misses a charge into the post though and we take a break.

We come back with Benjamin working on the arm for a change as they’re not exactly going at a high gear so far. A shoulderbreaker gives Benjamin two and the ensuing arm stomping has the fans a bit restless. Benjamin wraps his legs around the arm (at least he’s mixing it up) before switching to a cross armbreaker.

The cranking continues until Kennedy finally reverses into something close to a Sharpshooter, sending Benjamin over to the rope. Kennedy fights back but Benjamin jumps to the top for a spinning crossbody for two in one of those insane athletic displays of his. Kennedy can’t quite get a backslide but he can kick Benjamin in the face and hit the Mic Check for the pin.

Rating: C-. I don’t know what’s going on with WWE’s matches this week but they have felt incredibly lazy and slow paced. It’s been a lot of laying around in holds without much action in between. That doesn’t feel like what WWE usually does but it’s really not working. The talent is there, but it doesn’t matter if they aren’t going to use it.

Post match Benjamin says he won’t make excuses….but he has bronchitis.

Chavo Guerrero comes in to see Zack Ryder and Curt Hawkins, who haven’t seen Edge. Their discussion of wrestling figures continues.

The Brian Kendrick vs. Stevie Richards

Ezekiel is here with Kendrick. Before the match, Kendrick talks about how smart he is and goes over his history in WWE, which was all a ruse to get here. If you have any problem with that, take it up with Ezekiel. Kendrick takes him down to start and cranks on the neck with something like a camel clutch dragon sleeper. Since that can’t last long, Kendrick hits a middle rope dropkick to the back for two, setting up a Boston crab.

With that broken up, Kendrick settles for kicking Richards back down and then standing on his head. Er, Richards’ head if that isn’t clear. Richards gets fired up and fights back, hitting his own kick for two. A nice Sky High gets two on Kendrick and Richards sends him outside, where Ezekiel cuts off the crash. Back in and a quick shot lets Kendrick hit the Kendrick for the win.

Rating: C. Richards’ comeback was nice here but it’s nice to see Kendrick getting to keep building himself up. He’s different enough kind of star and I’ve been digging the start of his run around here. Richards is a good choice to put someone over and make them look good, thankfully which didn’t take long to make happen.

Post match Ezekiel puts Richards in a torture rack for good measure.

Great Khali vs. Jeff Hardy

Hardy realizes this isn’t going to be easy but shoves Khali anyway. Some right hands and a clothesline stagger Khali a bit but he takes Hardy down with a clothesline of his own. Hardy get knocked into the corner and slowly beaten down, as you might have seen coming. A hard slam puts Hardy down again so Khali does it a second time.

The big elbows in the corner rock Hardy again and Khali knocks him outside to cut off a comeback attempt. We take a break and come back with Khali putting on a nerve hold to keep Hardy in trouble. Hardy fights up again and manages a Whisper in the Wind for the big knockdown. The Swanton connects but Hardy has to take out an invading MVP, allowing Khali to grab the vice for the win.

Rating: C. This was about all you could expect from such a match, as Khali going ten minutes is only going to go so well. Khali’s reputation for being terrible isn’t exactly fair, as he is more than capable of having a passable match. That’s what we got here, as Hardy was fighting from underneath the whole way with a few nice hope spots. It wasn’t terrible by any means, which is getting close to Khali’s peak.

We get another R-Truth video, this time talking about how poor decisions landed him in prison. Someone told him everything to do and when to do it but then he became a free man. Now he’s determined to never let that happen again because he is in control. These have been very good so far and make R-Truth seem rather interesting.

Maria vs. Victoria

Victoria easily takes her down to start and grabs a front facelock. Back up and Victoria mocks the Kiss Cam, setting up the spinning fireman’s carry side slam for two. A headscissors gets Maria out of trouble but Victoria plants her right back down for two. We hit the seated full nelson for a bit before Maria is back up with a sunset flip for two of her own. Maria kicks her way out of the corner and hits a middle rope clothesline for the pin.

Rating: C-. Maria feels like the Smackdown version of Kelly Kelly, as WWE seems like they want to push her based on her looks and charisma. That makes sense, but the in-ring stuff just isn’t quite there. Maybe it could change for her as she is still mostly new in the ring, but it’s easy to see why she’ll get chance after chance. The fact that the fans like her a lot is only going to make it easier too.

Edge is in a confined space with Alicia Fox, apparently having invited her. He got her the ticket to the show because she’ll want to see his special guest.

Video on HHH.

Summerslam rundown.

Big Show vs. Domino

Domino tries a waistlock to start and is quickly knocked outside. Back in and some chops set up the chokeslam to finish Domino quick.

Post match Umaga comes out for the staredown with Show.

Chavo Guerrero and Vickie Guerrero don’t know who the special guest on the Cutting Edge is going to be. Didn’t we already establish that?

Here is Edge for the Cutting Edge, complete with a table, a ladder and a chair. He’s rather worried as he sits down to talk about his recent search for inner peace. His marriage is going through a rough patch, but in just over two weeks, he’ll be locked in a Cell with the Undertaker.

We pause for the UNDERTAKER chant before Edge talks about all the footage he’s seen of the destruction Undertaker can cause. That is why he has surrounded himself with tables, ladders and chairs, because he knows them so well and they helped him vanquish Undertaker in the first place. He has found the one person who can help him against the Undertaker the most: MICK FOLEY!

This seems to take Foley by surprise but he eventually gets in the ring. Edge understands that they have history but he is a changed man. What he wants is Foley to remember what he used to be, so we get a video on 1998, including a bunch of stuff that has nothing to do with Foley.

Eventually we get to the Cell match with Foley and Undertaker, which has Foley smiling a bit. Edge knows Foley is still feeling that match but he walked away on his own. Since then, Edge has seen Foley try and fail to walk properly. Now Foley has the chance to help Edge get back at the Undertaker. Foley talks about how much he would love to help Edge, but the one thing he has going for him is his word.

For years, Foley has praised Edge both on the microphone and on the written page. Unless fans have a really long memory, they think Edge sucks. They have been looking at an Edge who takes shortcuts and plays the numbers game while relying on his wife. Foley cannot help Edge, because only Edge can help himself. He needs to find the Edge who made Foley believe in him.

Where is the Edge who made the letters TLC mean something? Just two years ago, they had the greatest hardcore match in Wrestlemania history. If Edge can find that Edge, Foley and JR can call the greatest match WWE has ever seen. But if it’s the Edge we’ve been seeing, the one who wears a white tuxedo and uses a loofah, Undertaker will massacre him. Edge understands and then decks Foley with the microphone but Foley fights back.

They go outside with Foley finding a chair but Edge kicks it back into his face. The spear sends Foley head first into the steps, allowing Edge to load up the table back inside. A quick Mandible Claw is broken up by a low blow and Edge puts him on the table. The big chair shots off the ladder through the table leaves Foley broken to end the show.

They took their sweet time to get there, but as usual, Foley can bring the goods when you ask him to get serious and emotional. They had to do this kind of a change for Edge, because Foley was right when he said we hadn’t seen the really good one for a long time. It’s the kind of beatdown you need, though I do continue to wonder why anyone would want Foley’s advice on a Cell match when he never actually won any of them.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was almost all about Edge, with only MVP/Jeff Hardy being something noteworthy otherwise. They’re betting heavily on that one match and I’m not sure it’s enough for two hours, especially with Undertaker not being around. Throw in HHH not being here other than for a staredown last week and Edge is carrying this show on his back. He can make that work if everything goes right, but there isn’t enough going on to make this show good. The Edge stuff was good, but they need something else and HHH is going to have to be back to make that work.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 25, 2008: Got Him

Smackdown
Date: July 25, 2008
Location: Wachovia Center, Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

We are done with the Great American Bash and HHH is still the World Champion, having beaten Edge, who is still having all kinds of issues with his new bride, Vickie Guerrero. That could go in a few different ways but odds are it is going to be the big focal point for the time being. Other than that, HHH Is going to need a new challenger for Summerslam so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge marrying and then cheating n Vickie Guerrero.

Opening sequence.

Here is MVP with the VIP Lounge to get things going. After bragging about his hair, MVP lists off his various nicknames before bringing out his controversial guest: Jeff Hardy. MVP gets right to the point by announcing that Hardy will be in a battle royal for the shot at HHH at Summerslam. Naturally MVP is the favorite to win the match but Hardy brings up that MVP hasn’t won a match in….well a long time actually.

MVP talks about how Hardy has a lot going on right now, like being on the cover of WWE Magazine. Hardy likes to take big risks, but some of them have resulted in some big failures. One of those failures is talked about in the Magazine, with Hardy saying it resulted in a 60 day suspension (but not actually saying what it was). MVP brings up Hardy losing the Intercontinental Title and his home in a fire, with Hardy not being sure why we’re talking about this.

MVP thinks Hardy’s reckless behavior might have resulted in the death of his dog and that is making him feel guilty (geez). The reality is that Hardy is ruining his career with his behavior and because of that, he will never be WWE Champion. MVP doesn’t buy that Hardy will never be suspended again, with Hardy saying he’ll be released instead.

That doesn’t work for MVP, who says Hardy needs to start acting like a professional and a grown man. Hardy says he’s all about second changes, which is something MVP should know about. MVP tells him to settle down and gets shoved to the floor. This was a really weird segment and felt more like a public punishment/embarrassment for Hardy than anything else.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Non-title. Before the match, Benjamin says he liberated the US Title from Matt Hardy and there ain’t no stopping him now. Benjamin throws him down to start and drops some knees as Foley talks about Benjamin yelling at him backstage. Yang gets in an enziguri into a headscissors as Foley compares Yang’s speed to Cool Papa Bell (look him up). Not that it matters as Benjamin hits Paydirt for the fast pin.

The Edgeheads come in to see Edge, who is proud of them for winning the Tag Team Titles. Edge wants to apologize but they say it was his business. They have a match to get ready for and leave rather quickly. Edge looks at his wedding ring.

Festus vs. Curt Hawkins

Jesse and Zack Ryder are here too. Festus strikes away to start but misses a charge in the corner. Back up and Festus knocks him to the floor, where Jesse cuts off Ryder from ringing the bell. They head back inside, where Festus grabs the fireman’s carry flapjack for the fast pin.

Post match the bell rings and Jesse and Festus get beaten down.

Jenny McCarthy and her celebrity friends don’t like autism.

Edge corners Alicia Fox in the back and says she needs to blend in more. Bam Neely is shown listening as Edge says they’ll talk about this at the hotel. Saying it in front of a camera might not have been the best idea.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Stevie Richards

Kozlov takes him into the corner to start but Richards hits a quick clothesline for two. A belly to belly overhead suplex sets up a front facelock suplex as Richards is in trouble. Richards has to fight out of a Fujiwara armbar and sidesteps a charge to put Kozlov on the floor. Back in and a dropkick gives Richards one but a tornado DDT is blocked. The headbutt to the chest gives Kozlov the pin.

We get the same video on Edge/Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox that opened the show.

Battle Royal

Great Khali, MVP, Big Show, Jeff Hardy, Mr. Kennedy, Umaga

For the World Title shot at HHH at Summerslam. MVP bails to the floor to start, leaving Hardy and Kennedy to go after Khali in the corner. That gets them nowhere as Khali hits a double clothesline, followed by a big chop to MVP. Show hits a side slam on Umaga and gets the required showdown with Khali. Umaga is back up to superkick both of them down and we take a break.

Back with no one having been eliminated and Hardy hitting the Whisper In The Wind on Umaga. Everyone pairs off again and Hardy tosses out MVP for the first elimination. Show and Umaga slug it out with Show shouldering him down and then throwing Umaga out. Kennedy hammers on Show and is thrown out for his efforts.

That leaves us with Hardy, Umaga and Khali, with Khali chopping Show down. Show blocks the tree slam and manages a chokeslam, only to get headscissored out by Hardy. A Swanton hits Khali but just seems to get him back to his feet. Hardy kicks him low to escape the vice but Khali hits a chop and gets the win.

Rating: C. They kept this moving quickly enough and it for a better battle royal. You can only get so far with six competitors in the first place but the good thing is almost anyone could have won. I’ll take that over having a bunch of people with no chance in there and this worked well enough. Khali is certainly a dragon for HHH to slay and it should make for a….something main event.

Post match HHH comes out for the staredown.

We see a not so nice place with someone talking about growing up in a bad neighborhood, which is why he got caught in a life of crime. It taught him what he needed to know though and that is the truth, because R-Truth is coming to Smackdown.

Michelle McCool vs. Maryse

Non-title. McCool takes her down by the hair to start before they trade rams into the buckle. A dropkick drops Maryse (with a kick) but she sends McCool outside as commentary talks about Jennie Finch (popular softball player of her day). Back in and Maryse hammers away, only to get rolled into the heel hook to give McCool the fast win.

Raw Rebound.

Chavo Guerrero wheels Vickie Guerrero into the arena, where Bam Neely greets them.

Next week: Maria.

Edge tells Bam Neely that he needs to talk to Vickie Guerrero, in the arena.

Brian Kendrick vs. Shannon Moore

Before the match, Kendrick tells us how lucky we are to get to see him in person, because he’s that good. He also introduces us to his rather large bodyguard named Ezekiel, who will deal with anyone who tries to touch greatness. Kendrick hammers away in the corner to start but misses a charge, allowing Moore to hit a quick legdrop. Ezekiel offers a distraction though and Kendrick gets in a shoulder on the apron. Kendrick grabs Sliced Bread #2, which is dubbed the Kendrick, for the fast pin.

Bam Neely tells Vickie Guerrero that Edge wants to see her in the arena…but he can’t remember who is supposed to do the apologizing. Vickie looks….I’m not sure really.

Ben Stiller doesn’t like autism.

Here is Edge for his big meeting with Vickie Guerrero. Edge gets right to the point and says he wants to apologize to her in public, face to face, so he would like her to come out here. It takes a pretty long time but Vickie, with Chavo Guerrero and Bam Neely (in the busiest show of his life), finally comes out. Edge apologizes, saying that the video didn’t show how many times he tried to say no to Alicia Fox.

She was so aggressive and wouldn’t take no for an answer. Edge had to stay to hammer out the wedding plans because he knew how important it was to both of them. Nothing means more to him that Vickie’s happiness. Vickie seems touched and says she understands so we get a big hug, with Edge looking relieved. They’re not done though, as Vickie says she was a woman scorned.

While they’re better now, she did something when she was mad at him: she reinstated the Undertaker. Panic ensues but Edge says that’s good business. Undertaker and HHH can fight each other and he can pick the bones and get his title back. It’s not that simple though, as Vickie has already made a match between Undertaker and Edge at Summerslam….and it’s inside Hell In A Cell. Edge knows he’s in big trouble to end the show. This was actually a pretty awesome segment as Vickie strung him along for the whole time, knowing the bombshell she had waiting for him.

Overall Rating: C+. This wasn’t your normal show, with only one match breaking three minutes in two hours. At the same time, they set up a few major matches for Summerslam, which is off to a hot start. The opening and closing segments both worked well, with the battle royal being fine enough. This wasn’t a show that focused on the wrestling, which is ok every so often as it can give you some important results. That’s what they did here and it made for a good show.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – May 17, 2010: There’s A Reason We Don’t Talk About This Stuff

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 17, 2010
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler
Guest Host: Buzz Aldrin

This is a requested show, mainly because it features quite the Canadian cast of stars in Toronto. That should be enough to make things interesting, but we’re also in the Bret Hart Era, as he showed up again back in January and just kind of stayed. We could be in for a fun time, as I have almost no memory of this time. Let’s get to it.

As a bonus, this show is commercial free.

Opening sequence. Dang I miss Nickelback. Yeah I said it.

Here is Bret Hart to get things going and yeah the fans seem to like him (the Blue Jays jersey probably helps). Last week Hart heard Miz challenge him to a US Title match here in Toronto and he doesn’t take challenges lightly. He called headquarters and said book the match but now he’s had a week to think about it. There are so many old wrestlers who keep hanging around long past their time and he doesn’t want to be one, so the match is off.

Cue Chris Jericho to interrupt and he wants to know why Hart came back. Hart can’t fool him because all Jericho sees is a pathetic has been. Jericho doesn’t think Hart cares about closure and he’s only back here because he’s a big phony. Hart deserved to get screwed in Montreal, but Hart asks Jericho when he last looked in a mirror. What Hart remembers is Jericho learning in the Hart Dungeon but he was more often up getting a drink instead of training.

Jericho is the one who needs to take a good look at himself, but Jericho says he did that earlier and saw a man better than Hart ever was. Jericho thinks Hart is out here to hear the fans cheer for him one more time, but the reality is Hart doesn’t matter. To all of Hart’s new fans…..pause for a pro-Bret chant…..the reality is the Hart name means nothing anymore. Stu Hart would be ashamed of his son.

Jericho goes to leave, but Hart says tell Miz to get his boots on because he has a match tonight. That makes Jericho chuckle because he thinks Hart will try to get himself disqualified, so the match should be No DQ. Works for Hart, who also promises that the Hart Dynasty is going to beat Jericho and Miz on Sunday at Over The Limit. This felt like a way to have Jericho and Hart together in the ring and….yeah that works.

Great Khali hates rental cars. Hornswoggle is in a Hummer. It’s a WWEshop ad.

Here is Edge for a chat before his name. He talks about the people Randy Orton has been RKOing in recent weeks but gets cut off by Orton’s handpicked opponent for later tonight (with Edge getting to pick Orton’s later).

Edge vs. Christian

They take their time to start with a lockup going nowhere, leaving Edge looking rather confused. Christian takes him down again and we have another standoff. Edge slaps him in the face and bails to the floor to start the chase. Back in and Edge hammers away to take over, only to have Christian hit him in the face a few times. Christian sends him outside though and hits a slingshot neck snap, setting up the springboard dive to the floor.

Christian’s charge hits the barricade though and he barely beats the count back in. Back in and Edge grabs the armbar before knocking Christian down to cut off the comeback attempt. The armbar goes on again, only to have Edge switch to a simple pull on the arm. Christian fights up but can’t hit the pendulum kick in the corner. Edge catches him on top but a superplex attempt is countered into a tornado DDT for two.

The Killswitch is countered so Christian hits him in the face instead. Christian’s top rope splash misses and Edge sends him hard into the corner. The spear misses for Edge though and Christian hits the pendulum kick. The Killswitch still doesn’t work though as Christian’s arm gives out, with Edge sending it hard into the post. Now the spear can give Edge the pin.

Rating: B. Yeah of course these two are going to be able to have a good match with each other in their sleep. It helps when they’ve known each other for the better part of ever and they had the time to put together something solid. This felt like a showdown and they beat each other up with Edge picking the arm apart and finishing him off.

Post match Randy Orton pops up on screen to say he isn’t sure why Christian was out there, because that wasn’t Edge’s opponent. Here’s Orton’s pick to face Edge.

Edge vs. Undertaker

Edge immediately bails to the apron and yeah he’ll just take the countout.

Post match Christian throws Edge in and there’s the chokeslam.

Maryse is not happy with Trish Stratus being on the cover of a magazine because Trish is no celebrity. She also mocks Divas Champion Eve Torres, who shows up to pour powder over Maryse. The brawl is on with Maryse being left laying.

Buzz Aldrin and his wife are here when Vickie Guerrero comes in to introduce herself. There’s just one problem: the Aldrins are in her office. Aldrin talks about walking on the moon and compares it to Vickie walking out as GM of Raw. Actually her replacement will be here next week! Aldrin tries to show her some app on his phone but Vickie doesn’t care. That’s fine with him, as he has the Bella Twins come in and get rid of her. My goodness I forgot how worthless this whole concept really was.

We look at Batista attacking Mark Henry with a chair last week and putting him in something like the Rings of Saturn.

Mark Henry vs. Batista

Henry’s shoulder is taped up and Batista jumps him from behind with a 2×4. The shoulder is sent into the post and Batista steps onto Henry to get in the ring. Batista demands and receives a spotlight. Posing ensues and no match.

We look at the history between Sheamus and John Cena.

Ted DiBiase vs. Yoshi Tatsu

DiBiase brings out VIRGIL as his bodyguard as he is getting to throw his money around. Tatsu starts fast with an armdrag into a dropkick for two but gets driven into the corner. A big gutbuster takes Tatsu down though and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up and Tatsu kicks him in the face, then does it to the chest for two. Back up and Tatsu misses another shot and walks into Dream Street for the pin.

Rating: C-. You can consider a lot of factors about why DiBiase’s time in WWE didn’t go well, but at the end of the day, he just wasn’t that interesting. He has average size, a generic look and nothing special in the ring. Other than his father, what was there that made him stand out in any way?

Post match DiBiase calls out R-Truth (who turned down the chance to be DiBiase’s “Virgil”) and says the person who has no problem with being the new Virgil is the original Virgil. DiBiase says he if can’t buy it, he’ll beat it, including R-Truth at Over The Limit.

Chris Jericho gives Miz a pep talk and Miz is NOT answering questions. Instead, Miz talks about how you don’t see a national hero coming back again but Miz is ready to beat him. Miz walks into the arena and promises to embarrass both Bret Hart and the Hart Family name. He promises to make Hart scream and tap out to the Sharpshooter, just to make it personal.

US Title: Miz vs. Bret Hart

Hart is challenging and this is No DQ/No Countout. Miz immediately bails out to the floor and says he doesn’t trust Hart, who would bring in the Hart Dynasty. Cue Vladimir Kozlov and William Regal, who have been paid to deal with them. Indeed cue the Hart Dynasty to brawl with them to the back so cue Chris Jericho, with Natalya coming in to even things up a bit. A slap drops Jericho but he’s back up to deck Hart. David Hart-Smith is back in to help make the save but Miz loads up a Sharpshooter. Tyson Kidd runs in to break that up and it’s a Hart Attack into the Sharpshooter to make Hart champion.

Rating: C. Obviously this was more of an angle than a match and there’s nothing wrong with that. Hart gets one more title win, even a token one, and it was a nice feeling in his home country. It also furthers the Dynasty vs. Jericho/Miz so it’s not like anything was terribly hurt. This went fine and they got out of there quickly, which always helps.

Hart and his family get to celebrate a bit.

Money In The Bank is getting its own pay per view.

We look at John Cena winning a Beat The Clock Challenge a few weeks ago, meaning he got to pick the stipulation for his match with Batista at Over The Limit. Then Sheamus jumped him from behind to lay him out.

We get a message from our sponsor: Santino Marella, parodying a Dos Equis beer commercial.

Laycool/Maryse vs. Bella Twins/Eve Torres

Layla (the real one) and McCool both have Women’s Titles. After a near brawl before the bell, Layla grabs a headlock on Eve to start before sweeping the legs and getting two off a rollup. Eve is right back with a neckbreaker for two and it’s Brie coming in, with Layla rolling her up for two. McCool gets in a cheap shot to take over and then comes in for some knees to the ribs. Layla misses a legdrop though and Nikki comes in…as McCool pulls her over the top. A monkey flip and Hennig necksnap get two on McCool but Maryse comes in with the French Kiss (DDT) to finish Nikki.

Rating: C-. To say the women’s division was not doing great around this time would be an understatement, and that almost non-existent crowd reaction didn’t make it much better. They did feel like they were trying and it helped, but there is only so much you can do to overcome these problems. It felt like they were going over every piece of their script and that doesn’t make for the best match.

Post match Maryse and Eve have to be held apart.

John Cena isn’t worried about his critics because he would rather speak to those who still support him. He and the Cenation have tasted victory and defeat but he has never not delivered on a promise. Tonight he is ready to take Sheamus out and then he will go on to face Batista in an I Quit match at Over The Limit. If Batista can make him quit, there will be no rematch because the champion should not be a quitter. Batista has hurt him before but Batista can’t make him quit. At Over The Limit, Batista will quit and the champ will be here.

Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger

This is Edge’s pick to face Orton and Swagger’s World Heavyweight Title isn’t on the line. Michael Cole lists off Swagger’s talents, including being a Scrabble champion. Orton takes him down to start and Swagger is already thinking twice about this. Orton’s backbreaker has Swagger down and we hit the slow motion stomp. The big knee misses though and Swagger hits a clothesline for two.

Orton fights out of a chinlock and Orton starts the comeback but Swagger bails to the floor. Back in and Swagger snaps off a belly to belly, setting up the running Vader Bomb. Swagger takes him outside to keep up the beating before grabbing another chinlock back inside. Orton fights up again and kicks him away, followed by the snap powerslam. Now the hanging DDT can connect and Orton loads up the RKO, only to have Edge come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. The only thing this match did was remind me how awful Swagger was as champion. It wasn’t so much that he wasn’t skilled, but he felt completely out of place in this role and very far in over his head. Orton never felt like he was in serious trouble and that shouldn’t be the case against the World Champion.

Post match it’s an RKO to Swagger but Edge spears Orton down.

Over The Limit rundown.

Here is Buzz Aldrin for a chat. He’s happy to be here and talks about liking Swagger vs. Orton. Over the last few years, he’s been trying to make the space program better and we need new rockets and spacecraft. Canada has done some wonderful things as well, including building the landing gear on the craft he and Neil Armstrong used to land on the moon.

Finally Zack Ryder and Alicia Fox interrupt, with Ryder mocking Canada and their love of moose meat. Ryder implies that the moon landing was faked and we see a clip of Aldrin punching someone who said the same thing. Aldrin says he won’t pound Ryder…and we awkwardly pause until Evan Bourne and Gail Kim interrupt. Thankfully the match starts to wrap this up, as Aldrin was completely out of place here. That being said, who in the world thought he was a good choice to be in this spot?

Evan Bourne/Gail Kim vs. Zack Ryder/Alicia Fox

Bourne chops away to start and gets one off a sunset flip. Ryder comes back with a swinging neckbreaker as commentary mocks almost everything Aldrin was talking about and reference space movies. Everything breaks down and Kim hits a missile dropkick for two on Fox. Back up and Fox sends her to the floor as we talk about Aldrin on Dancing With The Stars. The neck crank doesn’t last long as it’s Ryder snapping off a running hurricanrana to Ryder. Fox breaks up the shooting star press, leaving Kim to hit Eat Defeat for the pin.

Rating: C-. Well, at least it was better than Aldrin. This was a rather out of nowhere tag match and save for maybe a brief feud, there was little reason to see these people fighting. As for Aldrin…yeah I’m not sure what they were thinking. He’s a celebrity but that doesn’t mean he belongs on a wrestling show. I don’t get the point of this, but that was the case with almost the entirety of the guest host period.

Post match Aldrin gets in to celebrate and even does something close to a moon walk.

Another ad, this one with Goldust as a blind date.

Sheamus vs. John Cena

Non-title. They start slowly with Sheamus taking him into the corner and stomping away. Cena shrugs that off and they head outside, where Sheamus is sent hard into the steps. Back up and Sheamus sends him into the barricade and they head back inside, where Sheamus gets to slowly hammer away. A suplex gets Cena out of trouble and he sends Sheamus into the post for another crash outside.

Back in and the AA attempt is countered so Cena settles for the ProtoBomb. Sheamus is back up to knock him to the apron for a running knee, which works so well that he does it again. Cena gets back in but the running bulldog is shrugged off. Sheamus slowly hammers away until Cena manages the flying shoulder to start the comeback. The threat of the AA has Sheamus grabbing the ropes but Batista runs in to jump Cena for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was better than almost anything else on the show and it shouldn’t be a surprise. Cena works well against power brawlers and that’s what you got to see here, as Sheamus continues to be someone Cena just can’t pin. It might not have been a classic, but it was a hard hitting brawl at the end of a not so great show and I’ll certainly take that here.

Post match Batista lays Cena out with a pair of spinebusters and grabs something like the Rings of Saturn to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The opener and the Hart stuff made this work as well as it did, but egads this era does not hold up well. For the parts that do work, there are even more things that miss almost entirely, like the Aldrin stuff (including the tag match), DiBiase and the women’s match. There is a reason you do not hear this period talked about very often and this was a good illustration of why that is the case.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Great American Bash 2008 (2024 Edition): See You Next Show

Great American Bash 2008
Date: July 20, 2008
Location: Nassau Coliseum, Uniondale, New York
Attendance: 12,454
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Mike Adamle

We’re wrapping up the period before the Summerslam build here and the card is one sided to put it mildly. The Smackdown side is pretty much Edge challenging HHH for the Smackdown World Title, plus a four way Tag Team Title match. On the other side, Raw has John Cena vs. JBL in a parking lot fight, CM Punk defending the Raw World Title against Batista and Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho in a grudge match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Vickie Guerrero and Edge’s wedding, plus HHH revealing that Edge cheated on her the night before to end Smackdown. The other big matches get some attention of their own.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Edgeheads vs. Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Jesse and Festus

Miz and Morrison are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Festus clears the ring as tends to be his custom before Hornswoggle comes in for a stare…uh, up. Hornswoggle rolls up his sleeves but opts to dive onto Miz and Morrison instead. We settle down to Jesse monkey flipping Miz and knocking him down again for two. Festus beats on Miz as well before handing it off to Finlay. Morrison comes in and actually takes over on Finlay before bringing Miz back in for a chinlock.

It’s back to Morrison for his own chinlock as JR continues his Morrison to Rick Rude comparisons. Finlay fights up and double legs Miz down before doing the same thing to beat on Morrison. They collide in the corner so Ryder tags himself in to hammer Finlay down. The neck crank doesn’t last long on Finlay so Hawkins comes in to keep Finlay in trouble.

The Celtic Cross hits Hawkins and a shillelagh shot gets two, with Miz and Morrison making the save. Hawkins grabs a chinlock but Finlay is back up again, this time getting over to Hornswoggle to pick up the pace. Jesse tags himself in just as fast though and the fans are not pleased with the lack of Hornswoggle. Hawkins comes back in for a cheap shot on Hornswoggle but it’s back to Festus to really clean house. Miz and Morrison are sent outside and Hawkins breaks up the Rocket Launcher to pin Jesse and win the titles.

Rating: C+. It was a fast paced opener with a bunch of moving parts but they managed to keep the focus on just a few people at a time until the ending. Hawkins and Ryder winning the titles is the right way to go as Miz and Morrison have gotten everything they can out of them and La Familia is still the biggest thing on Smackdown. Give the team some more gold, as it’s not like Jesse and Festus or Hornswoggle/Finlay are worth anything.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and is quickly taken to the mat to start. A small package gives Hardy two as well as a breather but Benjamin is right back with a headlock. That’s reversed into an armbar as they’re certainly starting slowly. Benjamin sends him to the apron for a ram into the post, setting up the armbar back inside. A gutbuster sets up the seated abdominal stretch as commentary talks about Benjamin’s aggression, despite there being nothing to suggest it exists here.

Hardy fights up and tries a Side Effect but gets planted with something like an STO. Back up and Hardy blocks Paydirt to start the comeback and hits the bulldog out of the corner. Hardy’s middle rope hurricanrana is countered into a heck of a buckle bomb and they’re both down. A Side Effect gives Hardy two but the moonsault…I think it was supposed to hit knees but Hardy overshot it anyway. Paydirt gives Benjamin the pin and the title.

Rating: C. The match was far from bad, but it wasn’t exactly thrilling, as it came off as more of a house show match. The ending didn’t help things either as commentary had to scramble to cover Hardy missing. It’s not like hardy was doing anything with the title anyway so switching it over to Benjamin works as well as anything else.

We see an interview from Monday, with CM Punk talking about how he’s always been the underdog. It’s not about your size or muscle and he’s in the business of proving everyone wrong, which is what he’s always done.

We look at HHH revealing that Edge cheated on Vickie Guerrero the day before their wedding.

ECW Title: Mark Henry vs. Tommy Dreamer

Henry is defending and has Tony Atlas in his corner while Dreamer has Colin Delaney. Dreamer charges at him and is quickly shoved into the corner, with Henry throwing him around again for a bonus. A hard clothesline puts Dreamer down again and Henry steps on his head as a few BORING chants start up.

Henry works on the arm (which is code for he leans over and grabs the wrist), Dreamer fights up, Henry takes him down and works on the arm again. The splash misses though and Dreamer hits the basement dropkick but has to escape the World’s Strongest Slam. The DDT puts Henry down and Dreamer goes up for no apparent reason, allowing Delaney to pull him down. Henry hits the World’s Strongest Slam to retain.

Rating: D+. This was a good example of everything that is wrong with ECW. First of all, there was no reason to believe Dreamer was going to take the title. He hasn’t been nearly that important for a long time now and it wasn’t going to change here. Second, the Delaney turn doesn’t mean much as he’s a loser who didn’t exactly become a star when he was with Dreamer. Third, the match was really boring, which is quite ECW in a lot of ways. Rather dull stuff here and by far the worst thing on the show.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels, and thank goodness as the show needs it. Jericho claimed Michaels is a hypocrite (and was kind of right) and then took out his eye. Now Michaels is back for revenge and to prove that no matter what Jericho does, Michaels will always be better.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

They lock up to start and thankfully drop that in all of two seconds to start hitting each other in the face. Shawn gets the better of things with some chops and knocks Jericho into the corner before going after the leg. The reverse Figure Four has Jericho in early trouble but he’s in the ropes pretty quickly. Shawn stays on the leg and the referee stops things for a second to check on Jericho in the corner.

Jericho is fine enough to send Shawn over the corner and out to the apron, with Shawn favoring his back. The knee is fine enough to hit a triangle dropkick out to the floor before Jericho takes him inside for a double arm crank. With that broken up, Jericho dives into an atomic drop and Shawn drops him with the flying forearm. Shawn nips up but Jericho pulls him straight into the Walls, which is counter you don’t see very often.

This time Shawn makes the rope so Jericho loads up the bulldog, only to get dropped with a clothesline for two. The top rope elbow is broken up but Shawn wins a fight on top and now the elbow connects. Cue Lance Cade to break up the superkick but Shawn blocks the Codebreaker. They slug it out again until Shawn hiptosses him out onto Cade for the big crash. Naturally Shawn is right there with a moonsault onto the two of them and everyone is down again.

Back in and Shawn’s bad eye is busted open, with commentary not being sure when it was cut. Naturally Jericho goes right after the eye and knocks him into the ropes, where Cade gets in the cheap shot. The very bloody Shawn manages to pull him into a crossface but Jericho pulls him into the buckle for the violent escape. The referee wants to stop it but Shawn begs him not to, meaning Jericho is right back on the eye. Shawn is COVERED in blood and does the “pull myself up on the other guy’s tights” spot, only to have Jericho punch him down again and hammer away….until the referee finally stops it.

Rating: B+. This took some time to get going but there is almost no one better than Shawn at making you think he was dying in front of your eyes. Shawn was trying to fight and was still in there until the injury flared up again, along with Cade offering the distraction. This felt like the big middle piece in a bigger story and they pulled me in with the emotion and hatred. Awesome match and we’re almost certainly not done yet.

We get the emotional exit for Shawn, who has to be helped out.

Edge is really not pleased with HHH for violating his privacy and taking away his personal life. All Edge has left is his professional life and tonight, he will be extra dangerous.

Divas Title: Michelle McCool vs. Natalya

For the inaugural title but commentary is to busy talking about Edge/Vickie Guerrero. They grapple to the mat to start as commentary compares McCool to softball star Jennie Finch. Natalya wheelbarrow drops her throat first over the top to take over and we hit the surfboard to stay on McCool’s….well various parts. McCool powers out so Natalya switches to the Sharpshooter. That’s broken up as well and this time McCool pulls her into the heel hook for the title.

Rating: C-. These two were in the death slot as there was almost no way they were going to be able to follow the previous match. It doesn’t help that the match was almost a Natalya squash until McCool got in her one hold for the win. It’s rather nice for the women on Smackdown to have something to do, but they could use some more blood in the division or it is going to turn old fast.

Post match here is Chris Jericho to interrupt, saying you need to save your ticket stubs because this is the night of Shawn Michaels’ last match. Shawn has a detached retina and that means his career is over. It shows that the good guys win and the wicked are punished and the worst has finally come for Shawn. Jericho was feeling the evil here and it worked.

We recap CM Punk defending the World Title against Batista. Punk won Money In The Bank and used it to become champion, meaning he needs to prove himself worthy. Batista doesn’t seem to be overly intimidated so Punk is extra motivated.

Raw World Title: Batista vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and we go old school with a weapons check. Batista powers him around to start and Punk realizes he might need another plan. Some kicks to the legs slow Batista down but he elbows Punk in the face to cut him off. An enziguri knocks Batista outside and Punk follows him outside with a suicide dive.

Back in and Punk strikes away, only to be run over to give Batista two. The camel clutch goes on to keep Punk in trouble, which is broken up as camel clutches tend to be. Punk gets up a shot to the face in the corner and hits a high crossbody for two. The Batista Bomb is countered but a powerslam isn’t, meaning Punk has to counter the Bomb again.

Punk hits the running knee in the corner but can’t hit the GTS, instead settling for the springboard clothesline. The Anaconda Vice (been a minute since Punk used that) is broken up and Batista hits a heck of a clothesline. Batista’s charge hits the post and he falls outside, where he is able to catch a diving Punk with a spinebuster. Cue Kane to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C+. They were starting to get somewhere but then just stopped for the DQ ending. This is either setting up a triple threat (erg) or Punk vs. Batista II, but Punk needs to win something on a big stage. It was bad enough that he got the title via Money In The Bank, but he’s lucky to crack the top five stars on Raw. This didn’t help things, though I guess Batista needed to be kept strong. Granted that makes me wonder why he was in the match in the first place, but I can picture Vince’s “oh it’s fine” face from here so we’ll move o.

Post match Kane lays out Punk, Batista, and a production worker. With Kane gone, Batista hits the Batista Bomb on Punk to make things even worse for the champ. Somehow this is a double DQ, despite Kane not touching Punk before the bell.

We recap John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield. With Vince McMahon gone, JBL has declared martial law but Cena isn’t having it. Now they’re going to fight in a parking lot.

John Cena vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

This is taking place in the parking lot in a circle of cars and JBL shows up in his limo, fighting in most of a suit. There’s no Cena to start so JBL gets on a hood, only to have Cena pop up in another car and ram into him. Cena chokes him with a cord and then slams a car hood onto JBL’s back. Some jumper cables to the crotch set up some electrocution and JBL screams a lot.

JBL is put on another hood and Cena throws a well placed keg, only to hit windshield. With JBL trying to drive away, Cena grabs him for some rams into the horn. JBL fights back to little avail but manages to whip Cena through a car door, knocking it off the hinges. Cena gets punched off a car for two and then sent through the windshield of another for the big crash.

A crowbar shot misses for JBL and Cena slugs away but JBL sends him through a window. With nothing else working, JBL goes to grab some gasoline (with his limo rolling away) and douses one of the cars (with Cena inside). The car is lit on fire and promptly extinguished, with an annoyed looking Cena getting out. JBL goes over to a forklift but Cena is there to send him into another car.

Now Cena gets in the forklift and gores said car, only to lift it up and carry it into the arena. Commentary kicks in as Cena knocks JBL around and plants him with the ProtoBomb onto the stage. Cena loads up the FU but walks JBL over to the edge of the stage, only to take too long as JBL slips off. JBL sends him off the stage and through a windshield for the upset win.

Rating: C-. This was quite the situation and I wasn’t wild on most of it. They had a bunch of slow brawling in the back with car stuff before coming to the arena for a few minutes. JBL had to get a win of some sort but egads this means we’re going to have to hear him talk even more, which is about as painful of a thought as I can imagine. Not exactly great here, but what are you expecting from JBL?

We recap Edge vs. HHH for the latter’s Smackdown World Title. Vickie Guerrero gave Edge the title shot before their wedding but then Edge cheated on her the day before said wedding, with HHH revealing Edge’s, uh, indiscretion. Now it’s about the title, though Edge is more than a bit distracted.

HHH has no regrets over what he did.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Edge

HHH is defending and we get the Big Match Intros with a weapons check. Edge charges right at him and hammers away but gets sent outside. HHH sends him outside and grabs a neck snap across the top. A ram int the buckle has Edge on the floor again but he knocks a diving HHH out of the air. Back in and Edge hits the running shoulder in the corner before sending him outside for a whip into the steps.

A drop onto the announcers’ table keeps HHH’s ribs in trouble and Edge grabs a bodyscissors back inside. HHH fights up but gets dropkicked to the apron, where he sidesteps a spear to send Edge crashing to the floor. Back in and HHH slugs away before they go outside (again) with Edge going into the post. Edge is right back up though and grabs the Impaler on the floor, which means a rather delayed cover gets two.

HHH hits his own DDT for his own two but the Pedigree is countered into the Edge-O-Matic. The spear only hits buckle but Edge’s big boot only hits HHH’s jaw, leaving them both down again. Back up and the spear is countered into the spinebuster to give HHH a much needed breather. The Pedigree is countered again, this time with a ram into the corner. Edge takes him up top for a superplex but here is wedding planner Alicia Fox to send in the title. Cue Vickie Guerrero to take Alicia down and the catfight is on in the ring. The spear hits Vickie by mistake, allowing HHH to grab the Pedigree for the pin to retain.

Rating: B. It was good but they never came close to hitting that really high level. At the same time, it didn’t help that this was more about the Vickie/Edge stuff, with the title just kind of being there on the side. These two feel like they should have had their first big match on a more important show, but at least what they got to do here did work. It just could have been a pretty good bit better.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a perfectly fine show that should have been better than it was. There were some big matches on the card and those matches worked, but the lower card stuff is completely forgettable, even with three new champions being crowned. It’s a show where things happened, but it’s not a show that felt important. Instead, it came off like a “the big one is next time”, which doesn’t make for the most enjoyable event.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 18, 2008: Stiff Trapezoids

Smackdown
Date: July 18, 2008
Location: Time Warner Cable Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s the go home show for the Great American Bash and we are getting ready for HHH vs. Edge, which feels something like a major match. On paper it certainly is, but in this case the main story is the continuing saga of Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Naturally things are going well again and now we are probably on the way back towards the wedding. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a long recap of Edge and Vickie Guerrero’s rocky relationship.

And now, the wedding, with Chavo Guerrero as best man and everything seems to go off without a hitch. The reception is tonight and that’s a bit of a twist on the usual formula.

The wedding party is introduced for the reception, with the rest of La Familia and Alicia Fox waiting on the stage. Chavo welcomes Edge to the family and thinks he’ll be perfect with some of that wild side. Edge isn’t THAT wild any more though, as he never even turns his phone off anymore so he won’t miss anything from Vickie. It’s Chavo’s honor to be the best man and he’ll be there when Edge wins the World Title on Sunday. Chavo even has a mock WWE Magazine with Edge as champion on the cover. Edge says Vickie loves her action so let’s get things started.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This is a preview of the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash, also involving Jesse and Festus and Miz/John Morrison. Before the match, Edge says he’s tired of seeing Finlay and Hornswoggle cheating every week, but Hawkins and Ryder are too smart for the water guns and such. So is Edge, who will be the guest referee.

Hawkins and Ryder (and Edge) are in wedding clothes and Edge throws the shillelagh out before the bell. Finlay takes Hawkins into the corner to start but Edge breaks it up, which JR doesn’t see as the best move. Edge’s distraction lets Hawkins hammer away and it’s off to Ryder for a neckbreaker. Finlay fights up and brings in Hornswoggle to clean house but Edge hits a spear on Finlay to give Ryder the fast pin.

Post match Edge heads back to the stage for the first dance with Vickie. Cue Big Show to cut in so Edge gives him a handicap match right now.

Big Show vs. Great Khali/MVP/Shelton Benjamin/Vladimir Kozlov

So how did Edge know those four would be ready to go if this was an impromptu match? Show shoves Benjamin down without much effort to start so MVP comes in. That involves nothing physical whatsoever before it’s off to Kozlov. Show shoves him into the corner without much trouble so Khali tags himself in. A quick clothesline drops Khali and everyone else comes in for the DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on, including the chokebomb from Khali.

Post break Vickie is in the ring (you might be noticing a theme here) to throw the bouquet, with a bunch of women at ringside. Michelle McCool and Natalya get in a fight, with Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder getting rid of McCool. Cherry catches the bouquet, which earns her a match against….Vickie. But only after her first match.

Cherry vs. Natalya

They’re both in dresses and Natalya wins in less than 45 seconds.

Vickie Guerrero vs. Cherry

Vickie pins her in five seconds.

Jimmy Wang Yang vs. The Brian Kendrick

This is the debut of the new Kendrick, complete with a monster named Ezekiel. Kendrick wants nothing to do with this handshake stuff so Yang takes him down with a headlock takeover. Back up and Yang hits a running clothesline to the floor but an Ezekiel distraction lets Kendrick get in a cheap shot. Kendrick starts in on the arm back inside but charges into an elbow in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Yang two so he goes up for the moonsault, only to have Ezekiel offer a distraction. Kendrick slams him down and hits Sliced Bread #2 for the win.

Rating: C+. This was a good enough debut for the new Kendrick, with Ezekiel playing into the finish like a monster enforcer should. Kendrick’s new attitude worked well and there is some potential for him to do something with this. Yang continues to be a solid hand in the ring and is the right choice to put in a spot like this one.

Edge gets a box of Slim Jim’s, saying he’ll show his spicy side later tonight.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Kennedy strikes away to start but Umaga gets in a hard shoulder. An even harder clothesline has Kennedy in more trouble and he runs into an elbow in the corner. This lets Umaga get in his variety of stomping/stepping on Kennedy’s head before grabbing the nerve hold. Kennedy’s comeback is cut off by a knee to the ribs and things slow right back down. We hit the nerve hold again before Umaga drops him one more time as we take a break.

Back with Umaga putting on ANOTHER nerve hold as this match will not get going. Kennedy tries to fight up but his slam attempt falls down and we are off to the fourth nerve hold. With Kennedy daring to do something, Umaga uppercuts him right back down as the fans are dying with every boring second of this mess. Kennedy fights back again and actually gets somewhere with right hands and an enziguri for two. The Mic Check is blocked though and the Samoan Spike finishes for Umaga.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t so much a bad match as much as it was terribly dull. The match was less than fifteen minutes long and it included four different nerve holds. The match just wasn’t interesting and it felt like Umaga was doing less than phoning it in. Kennedy can’t do much when his comeback is cut off time after time so the beatdown can keep going. Really dull stuff here.

Edge is in a new Slim Jim commercial.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Jesse and Festus

Non-title. Festus chases Miz and Morrison outside to start as the champs already need a breather. Morrison gets suplexed to start and Festus slams Jesse onto him for two. Back up and Morrison knocks Jesse into the corner as JR compares Morrison to Rick Rude. Jesse gets out of said corner and brings Festus back in to clean house. A Rocket Launcher top rope forearm hits Miz with Morrison having to make a save. Everything breaks down and Miz grabs the Reality Check to pin Jesse.

Rating: C. They kept this one really short and it didn’t do much to get me excited for the four way Tag Team Title match at the Bash. The champs have already beaten one of the teams, so why would I want to see Jesse and Festus getting a title shot? I get not having the champs loses here as they just lost on ECW, but it’s not the best way to go for Sunday.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Matt Hardy vs. Jeff Hardy

Non-title and they come to the ring at the same time, though only after hitting Chavo Guerrero with a cake. Respect is shown to start and Jeff goes after the arm. That’s reversed into an arm crank from Matt, who knocks Jeff down. Neither can hit a Twist of Fate so Jeff runs up the corner for the Whisper In The Wind to take over. The slingshot dropkick (that always looks good) gets two but he has to break out of the Side Effect. Jeff knocks him down again, only to miss the Swanton. Matt’s moonsault gets two but La Familia runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was a weird one as they didn’t want to fight each other and the fans weren’t sure what to do here. The smart move here is that they kept this short, as there was only so much you can get out of a match like this one. The action was good but the vibe was off, which was kind of the point of the whole thing anyway.

Post match the beatdown is on and Edge hits a spear to each Hardy.

Post break La Familia is in the ring so Edge can talk about how much he loves Vickie. He even has a special video package of their relationship, including their time in a park on a seesaw and in, uh, more intimate areas. With that out of the way, here is HHH to interrupt, complete with a big gift box. First though, let’s get this out of the way: no he isn’t secretly married to Vickie.

While he didn’t have the time to get a big special video together, he does have a video of his own. We see a video dated yesterday, showing Alicia Fox coming to see Edge with Vickie nowhere to be seen. Edge is worried about some wedding details so they go over some planning, including food options (uh, that should probably be decided earlier than the day before the wedding). HHH pauses the video and thinks Edge is a bit anxious, so let’s skip to the good part.

Back to the video, with Edge talking about how a white rose symbolizes his love for Vickie. He’s so attracted to scents, including whatever perfume Fox is wearing. She’s not wearing any perfume (cut to a VERY displeased Vickie in the arena) and Edge touches her arm, saying his trapezoid (Fox: “Your what?”) is locking up on him. A slightly nervous looking Fox rubs his neck (Edge: “I think it’s getting a little stiffer.”) but HHH pauses things again.

Edge explains that his neck was flaring up, with HHH saying lots of guys have women massage their necks when their wives aren’t there. An angry Edge sends the troops after HHH, who pulls out gift #2: a sledgehammer. HHH: “It’s one size fits all and there’s plenty for everyone!”

We go back to the video, which now sees Edge rubbing Fox’s back. Edge suggests taking the bra off (Fox isn’t sure) and mentions he went lingerie shopping yesterday, but there was nothing in Vickie’s size. He was told to go to the store for “bigger people” and talks about how big Vickie’s underwear really is. HHH stops the tape again and says this is awkward. He says he didn’t watch this yet, but it kills gift #3: some rather large underwear. HHH: “I can always park my car under it.”

We go back to the video where Edge takes off Fox’s glasses and…she’s going to leave. Edge stops her and they kiss, with Fox certainly approving. Back in the arena, Vickie glares at Edge, Fox looks like she’s about to cry, and Bam Neely is talking to Chavo Guerrero about something. Vickie screams a lot as Edge leaves to end the show. I’m going to assume they ran out of things to air here, as this went nearly 20 minutes and they easily could have accomplished the same thing in half the time.

Overall Rating: C-. It would be an understatement to call this a one note show as the Edge/Vickie stuff went from start to finish, with the villains sitting on the stage almost throughout the night. The wrestling was nothing special with that Umaga vs. Kennedy match being especially dull. Other than the Tag Team Title match, there is nothing important but Edge vs. HHH at the pay per view on the Smackdown side. Pretty weak show this time, though the reaction to Edge kissing Fox (once they got there) was good.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 11, 2008: The Not So Wedding Show

Smackdown
Date: July 11, 2008
Location: River Center, Baton Rouge, Louisiana
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

It’s been a minute since I’ve done one of these and I’m barely remembering what we’re dealing with at the moment. HHH is ready to defend the Smackdown World Title against Edge at the Great American Bash, though Edge and Vickie Guerrero are having some troubles, to the point where their wedding is off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Edge’s recent issues, from losing the World Title to CM Punk to his problems with Vickie Guerrero. Edge thinking that yelling at his boss/fiance was a good idea wasn’t his greatest moment.

Here is- Edge to get things going. He has had a week to think about what he said to Vickie Guerrero last week….and the wedding is STILL off. He’s happier without Vickie because he’s better than her. At the Great American Bash, he can prove everyone wrong by winning the World Title again.

He has won more titles than anyone else in this industry and he will prove how great he is again at the Great American Bash when he beats HHH. Cue Vickie Guerrero (Vickie: “Excuse me, baby.”) to say the wedding being canceled isn’t her loss. Vickie gives him a match tonight: a No DQ match against the Big Show. Edge says he isn’t afraid and promises to make Show a loser like her. Vickie has his mic cut off.

Video on Maria.

Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Matt takes him into the corner to start and we actually get a clean break. Back up and Matt grabs a headlock for some careful grinding. Benjamin sends him into the corner and hits a neckbreaker for two. The neck crank goes on as Benjamin certainly has a target so far. That’s broken up and Benjamin misses the Stinger Splash, allowing Hardy to start the comeback.

It’s too early for the Twist of Fate so Hardy settles for a corner clothesline/bulldog. The top rope elbow to the back of the head gives Matt two but Benjamin is right back with the exploder for the same. Matt is back up to try the Twist of Fate but Benjamin grabs the rope and hits…well it was supposed to be Paydirt but Matt fell the wrong way, making it kind of a jumping clothesline. Either way, it gives Benjamin the upset pin.

Rating: C. The ending was a surprise and it was even a clean pin, which doesn’t make for the best future for Matt and the title. For now though, Benjamin getting a push isn’t a bad thing, but he couldn’t have put his feet on the ropes here? Nice job on the surprise pin, though I’m not wild on the way they got there.

The Edgeheads are in Vickie Guerrero’s office and say the three of them don’t deserve Edge’s abuse. Instead, they want to face Jesse and Festus, with Vickie making the match.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Domino

MVP is on commentary and gets a few jabs from Kennedy during the pre-match chat. Kennedy takes him down to start and hits a corner clothesline, with Domino bailing out to the floor. Back in and Domino manages a quick slam and legdrop but Kennedy fights up again. Some elbows to the face and a running boot in the corner have Domino in trouble, setting up the Mic Check to give Kennedy the pin.

Rating: C. They kept this short here and that is how it should have gone as the point was for MVP and Kennedy to be in the same place, likely with something happening after the match. Both of them could use this feud as they could both go or a boost. Domino does not seem long for this place, as he could not have been more of a jobber here.

Post match Umaga runs in and wrecks Kennedy.

Chavo Guerrero, with Bam Neely, gives Edge a pep talk and says he’s going to give Vickie Guerrero a piece of his mind.

Post break Chavo offers Vickie that piece of his mind….which is about how horrible Edge is and how the Guerreros have to stick together. Vickie doesn’t buy it (my goodness intelligence!) and gives Chavo a match with HHH instead.

Miz/John Morrison vs. Finlay/Hornswoggle

Non-title. Finlay and Morrison start things off as JR goes on a mini rant about Edge and Vickie’s drama. Miz’s cheap shot earns him a flip over the top so Finlay beats up both of them at once. Hornswoggle comes in for some Stunners (JR: “Next thing you know he’ll be drinking beer!”) but a double dropkick cuts him off. An enziguri hits a kneeling Morrison though and it’s Finlay coming in to clean house. The Celtic Cross connects but Miz makes the save. That earns him a shillelagh shot, followed by the Tadpole Splash to give Hornswoggle the pin.

Rating: C. Nothing is getting a ton of time this week and that doesn’t exactly make me interested in seeing the longer form rematch. This probably sets up a pay per view title match and at least there was some cheating to get us to the rematch. It’s still a bad night for the champs though and that isn’t the best thing to see.

Video on Jeff Hardy’s Mission: Impossible themed photo shoot as he chases the World Title.

HHH vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. HHH fights out of a headlock to start and elbows him in the face, which does not sit well with Chavo early on. Chavo’s arm wringing gets him punched in the face and HHH starts in on the arm. Chavo comes back with some right hands and Neely’s cheap shot sets up a crossface chickenwing of all things. That’s broken up so HHH hits the running knee. The spinebuster cuts Chavo off again and, after decking Neely, HHH grabs the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: C. Well at least the champion won for once, even if it was in another short match. Then again, it’s nice to have a showcase for the World Champion for a change as you don’t get to see that often enough. Chavo getting punished for trying to play Vickie and Edge at the same time was nice too and the match went well, which shouldn’t be a surprise.

Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Natalya/Maryse

Michelle takes Maryse down to start as Foley explains how to pronounce Maryse. A dropkick gives Michelle two and it’s off to Cherry for a Hennig necksnap. Maryse runs over to bring in Natalya, who easily slams Cherry. Natalya gets in a kick to the leg and grabs the Sharpshooter for the fast pin. Did they suddenly get a go home cue or something?

Post match Natalya beats up Michelle and suplexes her on the floor.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Jesse slugs away at Hawkins to start and stomps him down in the corner. Ryder comes in but so does Festus with the latter getting to clean house. Festus clears the ring and Hawkins and Ryder just take the countout.

Post match the bell has turned Festus into a zombie again so Hawkins and Ryder beat down Jesse. They were being scientific….until Jesse rings the bell so Festus can wreck the villains.

Video on HHH.

Stevie Richards vs. Vladimir Kozlov

Kozlov has gained entrance music and runs him over with a shoulder to start. Some knees to the ribs and a fireman’s carry put Richards down and we hit the bodyscissors. Back up and Richards hammers away, only to get headbutted down for the pin.

Edge yells at Chavo Guerrero until the Edgeheads come in. The argument keeps going until Vickie Guerrero comes in. If anyone else tries to help Edge, or if Edge walks out on the match, they’re fired.

Raw Rebound.

Great American Bash rundown.

Edge vs. Big Show

No DQ and Vickie Guerrero is watching from the stage. Show starts fast and takes him to the floor for a ram into the barricade. The announcers’ table takes too long to load up though and Edge gets in a quick spear as we take an early break. Back with Show cutting off a kendo stick shot and throwing Edge into the steps and over the barricade without much effort. Edge comes back with a bulldog off of said barricade and they both get a breather.

A kendo stick to Show’s head lets them go back inside, where Edge’s choke manages to take Show down again. That’s broken up with a belly to back suplex but the chokeslam is countered into a DDT. Edge brings in a chair but charges a bit too hard, allowing Show to punch it into his face. For some reason that doesn’t know Edge silly and he’s back with a low blow. The Conchairto is loaded up but Show is up with a chokeslam. Show loads up his own Conchairto, only to have Vickie say stop the match. The bell rings and Vickie comes in to check on Edge.

Rating: C+. This felt like a house show street fight and that is probably something they have done more than once. The ending was more important though and that is going to lead to the next step in the rather long Edge/Vickie saga. Putting someone against Big Show is a pretty standard punishment, so everything here made sense, even if it wasn’t an instant classic.

Edge and Vickie reconcile to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The ending is the big story here as there wasn’t much else on the rest of the show. They did well enough with Edge and Vickie, but that’s about all there is on here, with even HHH not feeling that important. HHH vs. Edge/Vickie is a big time feud and having it take place at a mid level pay per view like the Great American Bash is certainly a weird choice. Smackdown needs another good story though as there just isn’t much going on around here.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw – July 7, 2008: Hurry Up So They Can Bash

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 7, 2008
Location: New Orleans Arena, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s probably not a good sign that I haven’t done one of these in so long that I barely remember what is going on. The big story is CM Punk cashing in Money In The Bank last week on Edge to win the World Heavyweight Championship, bringing a World Title to Raw. We’re also on the way to the Bash and that is going to need a card. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Punk winning the title and his first title defense against JBL last week. JBL declaring martial law is not exactly the most interesting idea, and John Cena/Cryme Tyme seem to agree.

Stephanie McMahon asks everyone to pull together in Vince McMahon’s absence.

Here is Vickie Guerrero in the ring to get things going. She is here to protest CM Punk being the World Heavyweight Champion and is not leaving until the title is surrendered to her. An apology is demanded and here is Punk to respond. Vickie yells at him and says Edge is so close to falling apart that he has called off their wedding! Punk says he probably did them a favor and explains the Money In The Bank concept. Maybe Vickie can find someone cute on Smackdown, like the Great Khali! Vickie stands up and slaps him, so Punk wheels her into the corner.

Cue JBL in his limo to interrupt and say Punk’s reign is coming to an end. JBL challenges for the title, saying Vince McMahon would give him the shot. Punk brings up that Vince isn’t here, but John Cena certainly is. Cena mocks JBL for blaming a variety of things on not being champion and doesn’t really want to hear about it. Maybe Cena should listen to Punk, who shakes Cena’s hand.

In reality, there is no one in charge around here, so we need to figure out Punk’s next challenger. Cena thinks he and JBL should have some kind of #1 contenders match, but here is Batista who wants in as well. Batista says Punk deserves the title after last week and also says hi to Vickie, who made him miserable on Smackdown. He feels sorry for her…but nah, because he really can’t stand her.

As for the title, Punk cashed in after Batista took Edge out but JBL cuts Batista off instead. Cena calms things down by suggesting a triple threat #1 contenders match tonight. JBL doesn’t like it so Cena says that means JBL is out entirely. That gets JBL in the triple threat, but now it’s Kane interrupting. He wants in too so Punk thinks we have a fatal four way. And that’s finally it!

Rey Mysterio vs. Santino Marella

Rey sends him into the corner to start but a faceplant gives Marella a breather. A camel clutch is broken up but Rey misses a 619, only to knock Santino down without much effort. Rey hits a jumping double stomp of all things and the 619 into the top rope splash gives Rey the fast pin.

CM Punk is…interrupted when a light falls down. Anyway, he’ll face anyone but Snitsky of all people comes in to say he wants a fight. Works for Punk.

John Cena and Mickie James are talking about last night when Kelly Kelly comes up to talk about their tag match. Cena is amazed that Kelly got out of her ECW contract, but apparently it didn’t exist.

Kelly Kelly/Mickie James vs. Jillian Hall/Layla

Jillian grabs Mickie’s arm to start and is quickly pulled into a headlock. Kelly comes in with a sunset flip for two and a hurricanrana gets the same. Layla gets in a cheap shot though and Jillian rams Kelly’s face into the mat over and over. They go to the corner and Kelly manages a victory roll for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This was about all you could expect from this match as Mickie was barely involved. It seems that Kelly might be the next in line to get a push but she is going to need a lot of work in the ring to really make that happen. She has to start somewhere though and the whole gymnast thing can get her at least a few steps forward.

Here is JBL’s limo…with JBL walking beside it. He can’t open the doors….so here is John Cena, holding a crowbar, to pop out instead. Cena says Louisiana has strict laws involving limousines and this one will never pass inspection. Fortunately for JBL, Cena knows two guys who can help get parts quick. We hear about some of those limo laws, with Cryme Tyme (carrying some large bats/pipes) helping to fix the limo up a bit. One more thing though: it needs a custom paint job! Spray painting ensues as a bonus. Cena: “Fine work by the Cryme Tyme Body Shop. It is sure worth the drive.”

We look at the cash-in again.

CM Punk vs. Snitsky

Non-title. Punk strikes away to start but dives into a bearhug, allowing Snitsky to drive him into the corner. Snitsky’s elbow gets two and the bearhug goes on again. More strikes get Punk out of trouble again and the running knee in the corner sets up a bulldog. The GTS gives Punk the pin.

Video on Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho, with Michaels’ eye being heavily damaged.

Here is Michaels to say he accepts Jericho’s challenge for the Great American Bash. Cue Jericho with Lance Cade, with Jericho saying he knew Michaels would accept. Michaels can’t help himself because all of the beatings haven’t taught him anything. Now Michaels is going to get beaten up again, even though he’s just another legend fighting for one more chance. Does Michaels want to be a martyr for all of these people? Are they going to pay for him if he loses everything?

Like every other martyr, Michaels is going to be swept underneath the rug and forgotten. Michaels talks about how he could leave wrestling today and be remembered forever. No matter what he has done, the fans seem to keep giving him a pass. Jericho doesn’t think that’s fair, but Michaels talks about what Jericho has done in his career. In spite of all that though, Jericho will never have peace because he will never be Michaels. And there’s the core of the story and that makes the story so much better.

Kofi Kingston vs. Charlie Haas

Non-title. Haas grabs a headlock to start but can’t get very far as Kofi strikes away. A cravate with knees to the face have Kingston down for two and we hit the chinlock. Kofi fights up with some dropkicks into the Boom Drop and the spinning kick to the face finishes Haas off in a hurry.

Rating: C. Not much to this one as they only had a few minutes. It doesn’t help that Haas hasn’t meant anything in a long time now so there was only so much drama about anything happening. I’m sure Kingston will get an opponent worthy of a title shot soon enough, but that isn’t Haas right now and they didn’t treat him as anything else.

Post match Paul Burchill runs in and lays Kingston out.

Batista is walking….and a fan randomly runs in to do his pose before running off again.

Batista vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. John Cena vs. Kane

For the World Title shot at the Great American Bash. The brawl starts fast with JBL booting Cena down for an early two. All four of them slug it out and we take an early break. Back with Kane elbowing Cena in the face and ripping at said face in the corner. Batista hits a spinebuster for two on JBL with Kane making the save and planting Batista with a chokeslam. JBL breaks up the FU to Kane and everyone is left down.

It’s Cena up first to clean house, including an FU to Batista for two. We take another break and come back again with Kane breaking up the Shuffle to JBL. Batista starts cleaning house and kicks a downed Kane in the face. The Clothesline From JBL hits Batista but Cena pulls JBL into the STFU. That’s broken up so Cena and JBL double team Kane down. Everyone but Cena fight to the floor, with Kane knocking JBL over the barricade. Back in and Batista spears Kane for the fast pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t some kind of a classic or anything but they kept things moving here and it made for an entertaining match as a result. I had fun with this and giving Batista the title shot is an interesting way to go. Punk vs. JBL isn’t interesting, Cena would be an overwhelming favorite over Punk and Kane doesn’t feel like a World Title challenger. That leaves Batista as the just right choice and he got there in an entertaining fight.

Post match Batista leaves so Kane can snap and beat up people working at ringside. Kane yells at commentary and drags Cole inside, telling Cole to ANSWER ME. Jerry Lawler chop blocks Kane to save Cole but gets beaten up to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. They don’t have much time to get ready for the Great American Bash at this point so moving rather quickly like this is a good idea. The World Title match is now set and Michaels vs. Jericho got a nice boost. This show felt like it got some things done in the span of two hours and that is not something you often see with Raw. Good enough show here, as the Bash is coming together rather quickly.

 

 

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Smackdown – July 4, 2008: They Did It Better Than Raw

Smackdown
Date: July 4, 2008
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

We’re into the new reality around here as both Night Of Champions and the full Draft are done. There is only one World Champion after Edge lost his title to CM Punk on Raw, meaning HHH is once again on top. Other than that, we should get to see how some of the new stars mesh with what’s left of the old. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at the 4th of July and talks about how the wrestlers get to live the American Dream with live action fireworks.

Opening sequence.

We open with MVP’s VIP Lounge. MVP wastes no time in bringing out his guest, the still World Champion HHH. After a nice hello, MVP congratulates HHH on his win at Night Of Champions and welcomes him to Smackdown. It’s been a long time since HHH has been here but he is already a big fan of MVP. HHH appreciates the bling and the Power Ranger outfit that MVP wears when he wrestles.

MVP says it’s cutting edge technology and Olympians wear it to compete. HHH says that sounds like a performance enhancer and MVP might get thirty days off. With that shrugged off, MVP brings up that he makes more money than HHH, who could see how that would make some people angry. Not that it matters as he would rather be a 12 time World Champion rather than the biggest waste of money in Smackdown history.

HHH is out here to get a rub from MVP though and he has some special footage. MVP doesn’t like that, so he says let’s play footage instead. We get a recap of CM Punk winning the Raw World Title and retaining it over JBL in the main event, followed by a brawl with security to end the show. Back in the arena, HHH says Edge got Punked out and MVP says Edge got his punk card pulled.

The jokes continue until Vickie Guerrero, back in the wheelchair, interrupts. HHH wishes her well on her upcoming wedding. HHH: “Imagine: marrying the boss to get ahead. Who thinks up that kind of stuff?” HHH thinks she and Edge just need to go to Vegas because he knows a great drive thru place. You don’t even need to be conscious!

Vickie brags about Edge’s success against Batista, but HHH says looking at her, there are things Edge would do that HHH would never do. Vickie doesn’t get what he means but eventually tells him to shut up. Edge is on his way here and speaking of Edge, HHH will be defending the title against him at the Great American Bash.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria vs. Cherry vs. Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly

Star on a pole match with the winner facing Natalya, on commentary and now a redhead, for the Divas Title. A quick brawl to start leaves Kelly as the only one standing but Victoria knocks her off the pole. Cherry cuts Victoria off before Maryse has to knock Michelle down. A double electric chair drops Maryse and Cherry catapults Kelly into the corner. Victoria adds the slingshot flipping legdrop to Cherry and goes up. That’s cut off as well so Michelle kicks Maryse down and wins.

Rating: D+. What are you supposed to say about this? It’s the kind of match that is all about one thing and not exactly having much to do with wrestling. This felt like something out of another company and it really doesn’t fit with what they’ve been trying with the women in recent weeks. Michelle finally gets put into the title match, which is long overdue as she has been the obvious pick for a long time now.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in to see Vickie Guerrero, who wants to know where Edge is. They don’t know, so she asks them about Edge losing the title on Raw. Vickie blames them both and gives them a match with Jesse and Festus. That’s a punishment?

Edge arrives and a lot of people look at him in silence.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Jesse And Festus

Festus is dressed as Uncle Sam. Hawkins and Ryder jump Festus to start and are quickly shrugged off, setting up a middle rope Hart Attack. Jesse has to fight out of a double team in the corner but gets pulled into another corner to begin the beating. Hawkins grabs a Russian legsweep for two and we hit the neck crank. Jesse is able to get over to the corner for the tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. With Hawkins sent to the floor, a seated senton and the fireman’s carry flapjack (with a great sell from Ryder) finishes for Festus.

Rating: C. This was in fact a Jesse and Festus match and that’s about as good as it’s going to get for them. The team isn’t overly interesting and the one joke of Festus losing it at the bell has long since used up its usefulness. It’s not like Hawkins and Ryder are great, but they’re a heck of a lot better than the other choice.

Post match Edge comes to the ring and beats on the catatonic Festus as Hawkins and Ryder make Jesse watch. Edge throws in a nasty chair shot to the head and stares down at Festus.

Post match Vickie Guerrero tries to calm Edge down but even the Great American Bash match doesn’t make it better. Vickie mentions giving him permission and Edge loses it, saying she doesn’t understand what is going on. He has been at this for sixteen years to the day but Vickie cuts him off, saying she is still his boss. She calls him a fool and Edge storms out.

Jeff Hardy vs. John Morrison

Hardy shoves him down to start so Morrison grabs the arm to slow things down. Morrison gets sent outside and a slingshot dive….doesn’t launch as Hardy head fakes him instead, setting up a dive off the apron instead. Back in and Morrison hits a running knee to the face for two but the Flying Chuck misses. Hardy’s slingshot dropkick in the corner is broken up though and Morrison drops him out to the floor in a crash.

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on an armbar before blocking a Whisper In The Wind attempt. The armbar goes back on, allowing commentary to talk about Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Morrison cuts off a comeback attempt by sending him shoulder first into the post but Hardy counters a dive with a sitout powerbomb. Hardy fights up with some forearms and a cradle gets two. The Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy two but Morrison Pele kicks him on top. The Moonlight Drive doesn’t work for Morrison though and it’s the Swanton to give Hardy the pin.

Rating: B-. This was the “Hardy is here and he’s good on his own” match of the show. It worked well with these two showing the same chemistry they’ve had before, with Hardy showcasing his ability to fight from behind. Morrison feels good on his own too, making for a nice match.

Video on Maria.

Umaga vs. Funaki

Umaga wastes no time in knocking him into the corner and a superkick puts Funaki down as well. Foley even goes inter promotional by saying this is like Mark Henry beating up Colin Delaney on ECW. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike for the squash pin.

Edge is ranting to Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder when he is told that Vickie Guerrero wants to see him. He goes to Vickie’s office, where she goes on about how she is going to be in the wheelchair with back problems for life (keeping in mind that she was standing earlier tonight). Edge says not to talk to her in that gibberish, so Vickie screams at him to GET OUT. That’s exactly what he does, with the door closing behind him. Edge walks a bit, then turns around and tries to get back in, but the door is locked.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. It’s a brawl to start with Matt running Kennedy over but Kennedy is back up with a kick to the face. Kennedy clotheslines Chavo in the corner but Benjamin is back up with a kick of his own. Chavo is back up to take Benjamin down, only to have Benjamin toss him into the air for a nasty crash. Matt and Kennedy put the other two down before knocking each other down as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy cleaning house as Foley compares this to Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton. Everyone but Chavo is caught in a Tower Of Doom but Benjamin is up to suplex Chavo down. Neely distracts Benjamin though and Chavo gets to Three Amigos Matt. The frog splash gets two as Kennedy makes the save. Matt hits a quick Twist of Fate on Chavo before dropping Kennedy onto Neely. Benjamin comes in and gets Twist of Fated onto Chavo, with Matt pinning the latter to retain.

Rating: B-. I believe they call this a sprint, as they were packing in whatever they could for about ten minutes. The 4th of July aspect meant that this more or less had to be the main event and it was a good match as a result. Matt retaining is a fine way to go too, even if getting the US Title off of ECW is not a bad idea.

Here is Edge, without music, for a chat. Edge says this will be his first and last statement about what happened on Raw. He was attacked twice on Raw and now he is going to get the World Title back at the Great American Bash. Ever since he came in here tonight, he was feeling the disrespect, including from Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder, who should have been trying to make him happy.

He didn’t even receive the support of Vickie Guerrero, who should be there for him in his time of need. Therefore, Edge is going to let us in on some dirty little secrets, but here is a screeching Vickie (walking) to interrupt. She asks what Edge is doing so Edge walks up to her. Edge says the wedding is off, leaving Vickie to scream a lot and take off her ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good enough here (ignoring the stupid women’s match) and having Edge’s breakdown throughout the show made it work better. They have at least a main event set for the Great American bash and there is time to set up the rest of the card. Nice show here, as they didn’t have a bad lull after getting the new roster set up.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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