Smackdown
Date: February 2, 2007
Location: Houston, Texas
Attendance: 15,156
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and Undertaker is the only person on his way to Wrestlemania. He doesn’t have an opponent for the show yet though and Batista is the only World Champion he hasn’t stared at yet. Ignoring the fact that there are three World Champions to pick from, it is time for the blue champion to have his turn. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Undertaker winning the Royal Rumble and staring at John Cena and Bobby Lashley, despite Shawn Michaels saying he’s going to Wrestlemania too.

Opening sequence.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Finlay

Benoit is defending and we get the Big Match Intros. Finlay drives him up against the ropes to start but gets slapped in the face twice. A clothesline gives Finlay two but Benoit pulls him down into a leglock. Some shots to the face have Finlay in more trouble so he pulls Benoit in by the arm to escape. Finlay forearms him down and grabs a chinlock, which doesn’t last long.

Benoit sends him to the apron and then out to the floor, where Finlay sends him into the steps as we take a break. Back with Finlay working on a half crab, which he doesn’t turn over. Finlay lays on the leg to pull on it some more and then cannonballs down onto it for a bonus. The knee is bent around the post and now we get the full on half crab. Benoit grabs the rope for the break and kicks Finlay in the face for a bonus.

Some chops stagger Finlay but the knee gives out on a suplex attempt. The good leg catches Finlay with an enziguri though and Benoit rolls the German suplexes. The Swan Dive misses though and Finlay grabs a near fall. Finlay pulls the turnbuckle pad off and then goes to grab the Leprechaun….but something pulls the Leprechaun under the ring. Cue the Boogeyman to steal said Leprechaun, allowing Benoit to grab a rollup to retain. Cole: “What is going on?”

Rating: B-. This was rolling along until the ending and that’s a problem around WWE far too often. The ending was a mess as we set up Boogeyman vs. Finlay over the Leprechaun, which is one of those things that doesn’t make a ton of sense and I’m almost scared to hear the explanation. The match itself was good, but just assume a time limit draw and stop watching.

Post match the Leprechaun escapes from Boogeyman and refuses to go back under the ring. The Boogeyman scares him though and Finlay throws him back under.

Vickie Guerrero, now sans neck brace, isn’t sure what is next for her around here. What she does know is that the working conditions around here are unsafe. She isn’t sure what is next for her but there is an opportunity that interests her.

Deuce And Domino vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Non-title with Cherry and Ashley here as well. Kendrick rolls Deuce up to start and it’s off to London for a front facelock. London and Kendrick start working on the arm but a Domino distraction lets Deuce get in a cheap shot. Domino comes in to hammer away, setting up a hard knee to the face for two. The armbar goes on with an elbow in London’s face, followed by some forearms to the back. Deuce hits a dropkick but London kicks his way out, allowing the hot tag off to Kendrick. Everything breaks down and the running knee to the face puts Kendrick away.

Rating: C. The more I see from these guys the more I like them, and then having them beat London and Kendrick is an even bigger deal. I could go for pushing a fresh team after London and Kendrick have dominated the division for the better part of a year. This was the least bad idea from a storyline perspective, as it isn’t like there is another team for Deuce and Domino to beat at the moment.

Batista comes in to see Teddy Long and wants to know what Undertaker is doing at Wrestlemania. He’ll find out by the end of the night.

King Booker and Queen Sharmell are in the ring, with a local government official presenting Booker with the key to the city. Booker has a speech ready, which includes him saying he is better than the other celebrities from Houston, including Walter Cronkite and Roger Clemens. Did Cronkite ever beat Big Show and John Cena on the same night??? Booker keeps going, with Sharmell’s facials agreeing facials are making it even better.

The government officials kiss Booker’s ring (doesn’t seem to be their taste) but Booker needs to go talk to ZZ Top’s Billy Gibbons. Booker wants him to kiss the royal feet, which isn’t happening. Instead, here is Kane to clear things out, including beating up the officials, because lawsuits do not exist in wrestling. That’s actually a fresh match for a change and I could go for it.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Vito

Vito slaps away to start but gets knocked into the corner and stomped down. The dress is ripped off and Kennedy beats Vito, in his regular trunks, into the corner. The Green Bay Plunge finishes Vito in a hurry.

Post match Kennedy grabs the dress to choke Vito.

JBL gets to host a bikini contest between Ashley, Jillian Hall and Krystal. Ashley and Krystal disrobe but Jillian reveals a short shirt and shorts instead. Rather that wearing a swimsuit, she sings Oops I Did It Again instead. Ashley wins and Jillian gets stripped.

Maryse welcomes us back from a bathtub.

Here’s the same Undertaker video that opened the show.

Mr. Kennedy complains to Teddy Long that he had Batista beaten at the Royal Rumble. Long doesn’t like it but gives Kennedy what he wants: a rematch next week.

Miz vs. Matt Hardy

Matt works on the arm to start and a hiptoss has Miz frustrated. A headlock doesn’t last long on Miz as he drop toeholds Hardy to the floor. Miz sends him into various things, including back into the ring for some left hands. Hardy fights up again and hits a middle rope elbow to the back of the neck. The Side Effect gets two but Joey Mercury sneaks in for a cheap shot with his mask, setting up the Mizard of Oz to give Miz the pin.

Rating: D+. So yeah, the story gets to continue because these guys have to keep fighting. They’ve had a few matches now and while the story with the nose makes sense, I’m not sure if it has the legs to make something like this go much longer. Miz getting the win is a good thing as it isn’t like Matt needs to beat him.

Here is Batista, who wants an answer from Undertaker. Batista has heard all about the Streak and how Undertaker can’t be beaten at Wrestlemania. He welcomes the challenge though….and here is John Cena to interrupt. Cena says he isn’t here for a fight because he has had a weird week. He won the Tag Team Titles on Monday (doesn’t have the belt) but then almost got superkicked by Shawn Michaels.

It’s Wrestlemania season and everyone wants to go after the title and then when it can’t get worse, BONG. Cena was on the wrong end of the coldest stare that he has ever seen and now he needs to know what is coming at Wrestlemania. The gong strikes and thirty seven hours later, Undertaker is in the ring. Undertaker stares at Cena, then he stares at Batista….and here is Shawn Michaels (without the Tag Team Title either).

Shawn says Undertaker won the Rumble but what did that prove? They’re the same kind of person and they both thrive on competition. Shawn is challenging him for a match with the Wrestlemania title match on the line. Undertaker doesn’t say anything because here is Vince McMahon to interrupt. Vince doesn’t care what Shawn or the fans want because they’ll want what Vince wants, when he tells them they want it. We’re not getting Shawn vs. Undertaker, but we can have Cena/Michaels vs. Batista/Undertaker. No decision is made on Wrestlemania, but they’re making it pretty clear.

Overall Rating: C. Much like ECW, the important thing here is that the show felt big. This felt like a show on the Road To Wrestlemania and a lot of that was due to the star power. At the same time though, a lot of the positives came from things actually happening. This show felt important and that is not the kind of feeling you get very often around here. It wasn’t a great show, but it felt like the start of something important and that’s good enough.

 

 

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Dynamite
Date: June 30, 2021
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Excalibur, Chris Jericho, Tony Schiavone, Jim Ross

We’re finally back to the normal schedule and that is a very good thing. It’s the final night in Daily’s Place as the show is heading back on the road starting next week. The big match this week is Sammy Guevara vs. MJF, which should make for a heck of a grudge match. Throw in the Young Bucks vs. Penta El Zero Miedo/Eddie Kingston and we should be good to go. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Chris Jericho is here for commentary.

Young Bucks vs. Penta El Zero Miedo/Eddie Kingston

Non-title but if Penta/Kingston win, they get a title shot later. The Bucks debut their latest horrible look with some rather thin facial hair. Matt gets taken down for an early rollup to start and Kingston holds the legs for Penta’s top rope double stomp. It’s off to Nick to take Penta down though and the double fist drop sets up some pelvic thrusting. Penta gets sent outside where he grabs a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Matt.

Back in and a high crossbody hits Nick, allowing the hot tag off to Kingston to start the house cleaning. Kingston is taken outside though and a knockdown sets up the apron moonsault/splash combination. Back in and Matt grabs a chinlock, but Kingston fights up again. That earns him a running knee to the face but More Bang For Your Buck is broken up. A superplex plants Nick though and the hot tag brings in Penta to start striking away. Everything breaks down and a corkscrew Code Red gets three but the referee calls it two anyway, earning a VERY unimpressed chant from the crowd.

A Backstabber gets a slightly farther apart two but Nick grabs the referee and kicks Penta low. The spike Fear Factor gets two on Penta with Kingston diving in for a save. Cue the Good Brothers (JR: “Where the h*** do they work anyway?”) but Kingston starts the comeback. That earns him a series of superkicks and it’s back to Penta, who gets backdropped to the floor. Brandon Cutler spray Nick in the face with the cold spray, so here is Kazarian to take him out. Penta hits the big flip dive onto everyone and the Fear Factor into the spinning backfist finally puts Matt away at 13:50.

Rating: B-. It took a lot but it was nice to see the Bucks lose for a change. You can only be so unbeatable for so long before it stops having any impact so it making them seem a little vulnerable is a good idea. I’m not sure I buy Penta and Kingston’s chances of winning the titles, but it gave them a bit of an opening and that is a good thing.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Christian Cage gives Jungle Boy another pep talk, saying he’ll be World Champion one day. Tonight is important too though, as Boy can be the first AEW wrestler to fifty wins. The rest of Jurassic Express comes in with Luchasaurus thanking Christian for having Boy’s back on Saturday. Christian happens to be related to a dinosaur and Luchasaurus is interested.

Here are the Men Of The Year for a chat about Ethan Page’s match against Darby Allin. Page is sick of trying to get rid of Darby Allin so it is time to try and exterminate him. After everything he has put Allin through, both here and on the independent circuit, Page needs to do more. Every time Allin tries the Coffin Drop, it’s going to get even worse….and here is Sting, pulling a coffin. Allin is inside of course and house is cleaned in a hurry. Page and Scorpio Sky bail out, with Page saying the coffin match is off for next week. If Allin will agree to not touch him until the match, MAYBE they can do this at Fyter Fest.

Jungle Boy vs. Jack Evans

They go technical to start with neither being able to get very far. An early Snare Trap attempt sends Evans bailing to the ropes, setting up a kick to the ribs. A very springboard wristdrag sends Evans down and a dropkick does the same. We take a break and come back with Boy dropkicking the knee out and hitting a hard clothesline. Evans catches him up top but a German superplex is escaped. Boy catches him in the Tree of Woe for a quick shot and the Snare Trap makes Evans tap at 6:06.

Rating: C. Boy has one of the best attributes you can have as a wrestler: likability. There is something about him that makes you want to see him win and that is going to take him a very long way. The fact that he can wrestle a good match with just about anyone is going to make it even better, and it has been working so far.

Post match here is the Hardy Family Office for the brawl, but Christian and the rest of Jurassic Express comes in for the big brawl. Christian chokes Hardy with the suit jacket until Evans makes the save, allowing Hardy to escape.

MJF talks about how he infiltrated the Inner Circle and started his own stable with the Pinnacle. It amazes him to see how Chris Jericho has turned into a version of the Looney Tunes and we hear about some things Jericho has done. MJF is feeling generous though and is willing to give Jericho some stipulations to get one more match. If Jericho can meet those, which he won’t, he has to leave MJF alone once MJF beats him again. That’s for next week though, because tonight Sammy Guevara has to learn that while he’s the future, MJF is the now. MJF was all fired up here, which is where he does his best.

Andrade El Idolo, in English and Spanish, with subtitles, wants to face Matt Sydal (“Matt Something”) at Road Rager in Miami.

Tony Schiavone brings out Kenny Omega, also with some questionable facial hair, for a chat. Omega talks about how earlier today, Tony asked him how he stayed motivated to find that next gear. Tony: “I didn’t ask you anything today.” Omega lists off everyone that he has beaten (or at least their accolades) before saying there is no one left in the rankings to face. That means he is going to take some time off from around here so he’ll be defending his other titles at the moment.

Cue the Dark Order with Evil Uno saying there are some challenges left. Omega laughs that off (fair) as the fans chant for some COWBOY S***. Uno admits that they don’t have the singles wins to make that work, but they know someone who does. Omega knows who they mean but doesn’t think he has the guys. This is where Omega bids them goodbye and goodnight and that’s that. They had me a bit scared with the Dark Order tease so the ending helped.

Brian Pillman Jr. didn’t like Miro putting his hands on Griff Garrison, who is like a brother to him. This isn’t just about the TNT Title, because this is personal.

TNT Title: Miro vs. Brian Pillman Jr.

Miro is defending and throws him into the corner to start. There’s an Irish whip into the corner and Miro starts hammering on the back. Miro slams him down again and we take an early break. Back again with Pillman making a comeback and sending Miro into the barricade. Air Pillman connects for two and Pillman hits a few superkicks but Miro hits his own. Game Over knocks Pillman out at 8:40.

Rating: C+. The 180 that Miro has done is outstanding as he is now one of the best things going in AEW. He is a serious monster at this point who is running through everyone in front of him. On top of that, his God’s champion deal is excellent and it is fun to watch him every time he is on screen. On top of that too, you have him wrecking people in the ring to make it even better.

Hangman Page is ticked off as the Dark Order for bringing him up to Kenny Omega. They don’t think he’s scared of Omega but they think he might be scared of failure. They’re here for him….and then leave him alone. Page doesn’t seem sure about this being his time.

Taz talks about how Team Taz is not at full strength, but sometimes family has to fight to clean things up. That’s why on July 14, Brian Cage is defending the FTW Title against a medically cleared Ricky Starks.

Rebel/Britt Baker vs. Nyla Rose/Vickie Guerrero

Baker jumps Vickie to start so Rebel can fail at a choke on Rose. A splash crushes Rebel and now it’s off to Vickie, meaning the Eddie Dance is back. We take a break and come back with Baker coming in for a Sling Blade on Rose. That earns her a failed Beast Bomb attempt and a low superkick staggers Rose. The glove is loaded up but Rose is back with a chokeslam. The splash in the ropes gets two but Baker pulls Vickie comes in, only to get pulled out of the corner. Lockjaw finishes Vickie at 6:55.

Rating: D+. So what was the plan here? Vickie asked for this match and then didn’t do anything out of the ordinary here, making it little more than a handicap match. That’s a weird way to go, unless the plan was just to be a distraction so Rose could do her thing. It really didn’t work and doesn’t exactly make Vickie look that smart.

Post match Rose lays Baker out again and it’s a powerbomb off the apron and through a table at ringside. Rebel seems to have been hurt, as she disappeared about halfway through the match and never came back.

The Inner Circle is ready for their six man tag against the Pinnacle next week because it’s time for some revenge. They’ll have their dogs around to deal with Tully Blanchard too.

Maxwell Jacob Friedman vs. Sammy Guevara

MJF bails to the floor to start before coming back in to run the ropes…into a strut. Guevara is back with a weak strut but misses a dropkick. Sammy runs him over but the GTH is countered into a pinfall reversal sequence with both guys nipping up. A rake to the eyes doesn’t cause Sammy many problems as he sends MJF into the buckle. It’s too early for the 630 so MJF bails outside, only to get caught with a double springboard cutter for two back inside.

They head outside again with Guevara being sent into the barricade as we take a break. Back with MJF tying him in the ring skirt for some forearms but Guevara grabs a backdrop. A springboard is countered into a sitout powerbomb to give MJF two but a Spanish Fly gives Guevara two. Guevara sends him to the floor for a big running corkscrew dive, followed by a springboard Canadian Destroyer for two more.

MJF is back with a shot of his own and grabs a chair, which is dropkicked into his face. That sends MJF over the barricade and Sammy busts out a CRAZY dive from the top to take MJF out again (that was amazing). Back in and Sammy goes up but MJF crotches him down. MJF hits a super Tombstone and that gets two, while also banging up MJF’s knee.

Another pinfall reversal sequence gets two each until Sammy hits the GTH for two, as MJF’s foot is in the rope. The 630 connects for two more and here is Shawn Spears. Chris Jericho gets up from commentary to cut him off but Wardlow jumps Jericho from behind and throws him off a not very tall platform. Spears gets in the chair to Guevara to give MJF the pin at 20:07.

Rating: B. This was a crazy match with some amazing athleticism and way too much going on to bog it down. There was too much interference, far too many people involved and at least two spots that either should have finished the match or not been included. The result was fine as MJF is gearing up for the mega showdown with Jericho, but there was too much here and it brought it down from great to good.

We get a rather nice highlight package on the time in Jacksonville with a song talking about thanking everyone for being there. That’s pretty cool of AEW after almost a year and a half. JR: “There is nothing like seeing WWE Dynamite live!” End of show. I know it’s just a slip of the tongue, but that has happened, way, way too often for JR and they need to do something about it.

Overall Rating: B+. Now this was more like the old school Dynamite which worked out rather well. They had good action up and down the card while also setting up some things for the future. It was energized, had the right flow and did everything they needed to do. I had a good time watching this and it flew by with a heck of a pair of bookend matches. Awesome show here and their best in a long time.

Results
Penta El Zero Miedo/Eddie Kingston b. Young Bucks – Spinning backfist to Matt
Jungle Boy b. Jack Evans – Snare Trap
Miro b. Brian Pillman Jr. – Game Over
Rebel/Britt Baker b. Vickie Guerrero/Nyla Rose – Lockjaw to Guerrero
Maxwell Jacob Friedman b. Sammy Guevara – Chair shot

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Dynamite
Date: June 18, 2021
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Excalibur, Jim Ross, Taz

The Friday series continues with a special match inside an MMA cage. That may or may not be your taste, but it is certainly something different, which you have to do at some point. This time around it is Jake Hager vs. Wardlow, which is about as logical of a move as you can get. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Jake Hager vs. Wardlow

Chris Jericho and Shawn Spears are the seconds here and it is a full octagon, complete with cage. Justin Roberts does his best Bruce Buffer impression, which makes me scared to hear his worst. Wardlow makes sure to turn his back on Hager during the intros, just to show off a bit more. We have three five minute rounds here and you can only win by submission or knockout (no judges).

They circle each other for a bit to start until Hager starts going with the striking. Wardlow doesn’t seem to know what to do with him here as Hager hits a few shots and then walks off to let Wardlow think about it. Hager’s attempt at a double leg gets him tossed away with raw power so Hager tries it again, this time with more success.

Wardlow blocks a kick to the ribs and hits him in the face, followed by a double leg takedown. Some right hands on the mat have Hager a bit more woken up but Wardlow easily wins a slugout. A Superman punch off the cage has Hager rocked and Warlow unloads on him until the round ends.

We start the second round with Hager in big trouble so he tries the grappling. That earns him another trip to the mat with Wardlow hammering away. A cross armbreaker is broken up so Hager floats over into a cover for some right hands to the face. Now Hager’s cross armbreaker is blocked but he grabs a triangle to put Wardlow in more trouble. That’s broken up so Hager grabs an ankle lock, which is broken up with a kick to the chest.

Back up and Wardlow powerbombs him into the cage, followed by a running hurricanrana. A spear lets Wardlow hammer away but Hager pulls him into the head and arm choke. Wardlow powers up but it’s a Rock Bottom right back into the hold in the middle of the ring. Hager cranks away as Wardlow flips off Jericho and passes out at 4:00 into the second round (10:00 total).

Rating: B-. I’m really not sure what to call something like this as it was a wrestling/MMA hybrid. It helps that they had someone who knows how to do that style in the face place and didn’t bother going far too long with the thing. Keep something like this relatively short and go with more wrestling than MMA and it will work out, which is what they did here.

Post match respect is teased but Spears comes in to jump Hager. Jericho comes in but the beatdown is on, with MJF coming in to put Jericho in the Salt of the Earth. Cue Dean Malenko for the save so MJF hits him as well. Now it’s Sammy Guevara coming in for the real save to clear the cage.

Frankie Kazarian, Penta and Eddie Kingston are ready for the Elite tonight, with Kazarian quoting the Bible about letting God take care of vengeance. He doesn’t quite agree with that because it is time to take out the Elite tonight. Kingston says pray to your God to take your souls because your a**** belong to them. Penta: “Cero miedo!”.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Team Taz, minus Brian Cage, knows there are issues with the team but let’s focus on Hangman Page. He won a handicap match last week so let’s have Page vs. Powerhouse Hobbs next week.

Men Of The Year vs. Darby Allin

Allin has asked Sting to not be here. Ethan Page starts for the team and gets taken down with an early springboard armdrag. Allin takes him down again but a cheap shot puts him down. A hard toss sends Allin into the corner and it’s off to Sky as we take a break. Back with Sky hitting a backbreaker but Allin grabs a rollup for two. Page taunts Allin over having no one to tag but Allin manages a Scorpion Death Drop. It’s back to Sky as Allin tags himself and hits a Code Red for two.

The referee doesn’t like the double teaming so Allin whips out a zip tie to tie up Page’s legs. Some rollups get two on Sky and the flipping Stunner is good for the same, with Page making the save. Page finds a tool box to cut himself free and there’s a hard posting to knock Allin silly. Back in and Page takes him up top but Allin bites the hand to escape. That earns him a crotching from Sky, setting up the Ego’s Edge to finish Allin at 11:58.

Rating: C. The zip tie was clever but I can’t bring myself to get into Page and Sky. They’re the definition of just there for me and that makes for some pretty weak appearances. That being said, they needed the win here and are the kind of team who should be bragging about winning a handicap match. Allin looked stupid for taking the match, but he has never been presented as the brightest guy.

Cezar Bononi vs. Orange Cassidy

The Wingmen and the Best Friends are all at ringside. Bononi throws Cassidy into the corner to start and forces Cassidy’s hands into his pockets. Cassidy gets tossed outside so the Wingmen can spray tan him. Back in and Bononi throws him outside again, where they mess with Cassidy’s hair and put him in Ryan Nemeth’s HUNK jacket.

Bononi joins him for a change and this time Cassidy jumps onto him, only to get caught. The Best Friends finally get involved and put Cassidy’s glasses on him, setting up the huge toss dive (with the Wingmen standing there while it is being set up). Back in and the Orange Punch finishes Bononi at 5:14.

Rating: D-. Yeah I know I’m old and don’t know how to have fun but this was absolutely not for me. The idea of Peter Avalon having a stable is an even bigger stretch than QT Marshall and this was just a mess. Way too many people running around and the Wingmen standing there for ten seconds while the Best Friends set something up made it even worse. I know a lot of people love Cassidy and that’s all well and good, but this really did not work for me.

Kenny Omega and Don Callis run into Jungle Boy, with Omega saying that Boy tarnished his image last week. Omega doesn’t like being disrespected and is ready to fight right now. Boy gets ready but Michael Nakazawa gets in a cheap shot from behind. Boy fights back so the villains run to their golf cart, with Omega kicking Nakazawa off and shouting he’ll get Boy next week. Omega: “NEXT WEEK!!!” Eh points for a Dr. Claw moment.

The Hardy Family Office thinks there might have been some people working together in the Casino Battle Royal. Matt Hardy doesn’t like Christian Cage, who pops up to try and go after him. Cage gets locked in….well in a cage actually, with Hardy offering him a deal to stop this, but Cage doesn’t seem interested.

Brock Anderson/Cody Rhodes vs. Aaron Solow/QT Marshall

This is Brock (Arn’s son) debut and he does not exactly have the most impressive physique. He takes Solow down to start so Marshall comes in instead. Brock grabs Marshall by the arm so it’s right back to Solow, with Cody diving onto Marshall. Back in and Cody can’t grab an armdrag so Solow takes him into the corner. That doesn’t last long so Brock comes back in for some gutwrench suplexes, only to walk into Marshall’s spinebuster.

We take a break and come back with Brock getting out of the corner and diving over to Cody. Solow is smart enough to offer a distraction though, meaning the referee doesn’t see it. A belly to back suplex/neckbreaker combination gets two on Brock but he avoids a charge and gets over to Cody for the hot tag. House is cleaned in a hurry as everything breaks down. Cody takes Marshall out to the ramp and Brock jacknife rolls Solow up for the pin at 10:01.

Rating: C-. This is a tricky one as it was Brock’s debut and it’s not quite fair to grade him like a seasoned veteran. That being said, if he wasn’t Arn’s son, he would be laughed out of most tryouts. He had no physique to speak of and was as generic of a guy in trunks as you could ask for. The match wasn’t bad due to how fast paced they kept things, but Brock needs to be a one off for the time being.

Jake Roberts says Lance Archer couldn’t be a doctor because he has no patience.

Earlier today, JR sat down with Andrade El Idolo and asked him why he’s here in AEW. Andrade says that he deserves an opportunity at the top titles around here. JR brings up Vickie Guerrero, with Andrade saying they’re perfect together because they both come from big wrestling families. But wait, because they have a surprise.

The Dark Order is happy because John Silver’s shoulder is healed. Hangman Page doesn’t want to talk about the World Title, but he would like to praise Evil Uno for his work last week.

Julia Hart vs. Penelope Ford

Haven’t seen Ford in a bit. Hart gets headlocked down to start and sent to the apron for a slingshot knee drop. We take an early break and come back with Hart hitting her clotheslines but she misses a running version in the corner. Ford tries a flipping clothesline but gets caught in a sunset flip for two. Ford’s next clothesline connects for two and she catches Hart’s kick to the ribs. A slap sets up a fireman’s carry gutbuster but Ford misses a moonsault. Hart misses a split legged moonsault though and it’s a Muta Lock to give Ford the win at 7:08.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here and that sequence in the corner was nearly brutal. Ford hasn’t been around for a bit but she is still a big enough deal to beat Hart, who has mainly been a manager. This wasn’t exactly good, but it was a fair enough way to bring Ford back onto the show.

Post match the hold stays on so the Varsity Blondes make the save. Miro runs in to go after Brian Pillman Jr. and they have to be held apart. I could go for this.

Vickie Guerrero interrupts Britt Baker and Reba to say they smell bad and like cheeseburgers. She has done them a favor and set up the two of them against Nyla Rose and herself next week. Britt certainly approves.

Video on FTR vs. Santana/Ortiz. They come from different parts of the country and both of them know how tough they are. FTR brags about having accomplished more in six months than Santana and Ortiz have in two years, so their next win will be another notch in their legacy. No date is given, but FTR not having a regular tag match on Dynamite since February needs to be fixed soon.

Mark Sterling and Jade Cargill have a deal with a hotel in Toronto so her opponents can have a place to recover. She is going to continue her winning streak because she is that b****.

Matt Jackson/Good Brothers vs. Frankie Kazarian/Eddie Kingston/Penta El Zero Miedo

Don Callis joins commentary as the Nick Jackson and Brandon Cutler are at ringside. Matt takes Kazarian down to start so it’s off to Penta to clean a bit of house. Kingston comes in to brawl to the floor with Gallows as everything breaks down. We take a break and come back with Kingston hitting a release belly to belly on Matt for a breather.

The hot tag brings in Penta to wreck things, including a kick to put Anderson on the floor and a big flip dive onto both Brothers. Everything breaks down with Matt getting hit with something from everyone, capped off by Angel’s Wings from Kazarian with Gallows making the save. The Magic Killer is broken up but Anderson kicks Penta in the face. The Backstabber out of the corner drops Anderson but Nick Jackson sprays the cold stuff into Penta’s eyes. A top rope neckbreaker gives Anderson the pin on Penta at 14:02.

Rating: C-. These Buck matches are getting rougher and rougher, as they continue to survive against everyone while getting the last laugh. It’s ok to give up something at some point, especially in a match where the team isn’t even together. The match was also all over the place and never stopped moving, which was a bit much here. It’s ok to slow things down a bit, but that was never going to be the case for these guys.

Overall Rating: C. This wasn’t one of their better shows but the energy remained high and there was enough good stuff in there to carry it. You still get the feeling that these shows are a little less important than others, but again, what are you expecting from a show ending at midnight on a Friday in the middle of June? AEW is just riding this time out and that makes sense given the situation they’re in at the moment.

With all that being said, this show really, really needs to cut down on the amount of people they include every week. There are just WAY too many people on this show, with most of them in factions. You had six groups (Inner Circle, Pinnacle, Best Friends, Wingmen, Nightmare Family, Nightmare Factory) featured in the first four matches. It’s overwhelming and having so many people out there distracts from the ones who are supposed to be featured. Just cool it down a bit and let the people with the star power shine instead of having an entourage for everyone.

Results
Jake Hager b. Wardlow – Head and arm choke
Men of the Year b. Darby Allin – Ego’s Edge
Orange Cassidy b. Cezar Bononi – Orange Punch
Brock Anderson/Cody Rhodes b. Aaron Solow/QT Marshall – Jackknife rollup to Solow
Penelope Ford b. Julia Hart – Muta Lock
Good Brothers/Matt Jackson b. Frankie Kazarian/Eddie Kingston/Penta El Zero Miedo – Top rope neckbreaker to Penta

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: January 5, 2007
Location: Lakeland Center, Lakeland, Florida
Attendance: 4,800
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

It’s the first Smackdown of the new year and we are just a few weeks away from the Royal Rumble. That means we need to get some things ready and in this case that includes a theme show, as Teddy Long has announced the Beat The Clock Sprint. In other words, we are getting a Beat The Clock Challenge to determine Batista’s challenger for the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Here are the most recent results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Teddy Long to get things going. As has already been announced, Long explains the Beat The Clock Challenge. There will be sixteen wrestlers in eight random matches, with whoever wins in the fastest time getting the World Title shot against Batista at the Royal Rumble. This brings out Batista (to quite the eruption) to say he likes the idea of being in the ring against the best. With that out of the way, it’s time to get things going.

Beat The Clock: Kane vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo looks a good bit nervous to start and an early rollup attempt goes rather badly. Kane powers him out to the floor where Chavo isn’t sure what to do. Back in and a slam into a jumping legdrop gives Kane two, followed by another trip to the floor. Chavo gets in some stomps on the way back in and sends Kane into the steps for his first breather. Back in and Chavo hits a dropkick between the shoulders, setting up a headscissor choke to keep Kane in trouble.

That’s broken up in a hurry but Kane’s suplex is countered into a DDT. That just makes Kane sit up and the real beating is on. A running clothesline in the corner sets up a side slam but the chokeslam is broken up. Instead Kane backdrops him down and puts Chavo on top. That is broken up as well though and Chavo hits the frog splash….with Kane catching him by the throat for the chokeslam and the pin at 7:53.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure how much drama there was here but it is nice to have some kind of stakes on the match. That time isn’t going to last for more than a match or two but at least they had something simple and to the point here. Kane beating up Chavo worked, even though Chavo’s offense wasn’t exactly the most convincing.

Maryse, in limited clothing, welcomes us back to the show.

Beat The Clock: Paul London vs. Brian Kendrick

The clock is set at 7:53 and what a coincidence. They trade quick rollups to start and Kendrick grabs a headlock. This gives JBL a chance to talk about drinking with Faarooq as Batista is watching in the back. London’s headlock is countered into a headscissors and Kendrick grabs a headlock takeover of his own. They trade some more near falls until London tries to force Kenrdrick’s arms down for a cover. London’s double underhook doesn’t work either as Kendrick backdrops him for two.

You can hear the BORING chants as they get up for a standoff. Kendrick tries an O’Connor roll but gets sent outside for….nothing actually. Back in and they hit stereo crossbodies for a double knockdown. Another exchange of rollups goes nowhere as Kendrick falls out to the floor. Back in and Kendrick grabs a headlock with less than a minute to go. That doesn’t last long so they try some rollups for two each as time expires.

Rating: C-. I wasn’t feeling this one and there were times where they came off as rather dumb. Why would you grab a headlock in a timed match with less than a minute to go? On top of that, JBL wasn’t even screaming at them for being stupid. This was going off the style of they know each other so well and are mirror images of each other, which might make for a nice idea but it rarely works well in practice.

Post match Ashley comes out to make sure everything is cool, allowing JBL to plug her Playboy appearance. Again.

JBL is in the ring for a chat, as he continues to rant about Teddy Long ruining Smackdown. We see another clip of the Inferno match with MVP’s back being burned, plus some photos of MVP’s burned back. Cue MVP to thank JBL for speaking for him, as he was busy being in the hospital and all that jazz. Then he heard about the Beat The Clock Challenge and knew he had to come back and get his shot at the title. That’s why he’ll be here next week in case Long is willing to put him in the competition. This wasn’t exactly a heel promo as it’s kind of hard to take issue with MVP being mad about being SET ON FIRE.

Beat The Clock: King Booker vs. Gregory Helms

Non-title, Queen Sharmell handles Booker’s introduction and the clock is set at 7:53. Booker wastes no time (because he’s smart) by clotheslining him into the ropes as, again, Batista looks on. Helms escapes a suplex and hammers away but Booker grabs a spinebuster for two.

Booker hits a superkick and strikes away in the corner but Helms is back with some forearms. Helms wraps the leg around the rope and hammers away in the corner until he is dropped throat first across the top. Another kick to the face gives Booker two but Helms gets fast and hits a quick middle rope dropkick. A high crossbody/forearm gives Helms two more and he dodges the ax kick for a bonus. Sharmell offers a distraction though and it’s the side kick into the ax kick to give Booker the win at 6:24.

Rating: C. This was a weird one but both guys felt like they were trying to win as fast as they could here. It is nice to see people being smart in a match like this for a change as that has not quite been the case so far. Again though, can we PLEASE get rid of the Cruiserweight Title already? It is very clear that WWE does not care about it so drop the thing before it makes Helms look even worse.

Post match Booker and Sharmell leave so here is the Boogeyman to plant Helms again. Boogeyman worms him to make it worse.

We gt a pretty long video on Batista, looking over his entire career from the Deacon days to Evolution to the injury to the return to get the title back. This was pretty good.

Ashley vs. Jillian Hall

During the entrances, Jillian talks about wanting to destroy Ashley’s pretty face. Jillian takes her down to start and rips at the face a bit. A running knee hits Ashley in the face but she gets a boot up in the corner. Ashley headscissors her out of the corner but walks into a powerbomb for two. Not that it matters as Ashley grabs a quick small package for the pin.

Maryse welcomes us back to the show again.

Beat The Clock: Tatanka vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

The clock is set at 6:24 and JBL is all over the cowboy vs. Indian story. Tatanka jumps him to start but walks into a rollup and a neckbreaker for two each. A sleeper doesn’t work very well on Tatanka as he powers out and gorilla presses Yang outside for a crash. Back in and it’s something like a pumphandle slam into a suplex into a backbreaker for two each on Yang.

A few kicks get Yang out of trouble though, including a middle rope missile dropkick for two. The comeback is so strong that Yang’s chaps fall apart. Yang goes up but gets suplexed back down as the time is starting to wrap up. A slam gets two on Yang but he is right back up with the moonsault press as time expires.

Rating: C. I wouldn’t have bet on this working but they had a pretty nice match here. Tatanka isn’t exactly lighting the world on fire but he can wrestle a good enough power style. Yang is quick enough to hang in there with most opponents and they pulled out a pretty shocking match here. Not great, but what kind of expectations would there have been coming in?

Post match, Tatanka beats Yang down again.

Vickie Guerrero talks about how Chris Benoit caused the problems between herself and Chavo Guerrero. Everyone has turned their backs on her and now she has nothing. Crying ensues.

We recap the Challenge matches so far.

Here is Mr. Kennedy to talk about how he is sports entertainment. I think he means he’s going to win.

Beat The Clock: Mr. Kennedy vs. Chris Benoit

Non-title and the clock is set at 6:24. They grapple into the corner to start with Kennedy actually getting the better of things. A whip into the corner puts Benoit down for two as we see Batista watching in the back. There’s another whip into the corner for two more as this is one sided so far. Benoit grabs a quick rollup for two but the Sharpshooter is countered into Kennedy’s own near fall.

The Kenton Bomb hits raised knees and it’s time to roll the German suplexes. The Swanton misses though and Kennedy takes a turnbuckle pad off. Benoit snaps on the Crossface, with Kennedy going straight into the rope. Back up and Benoit is sent into the exposed buckle to give Kennedy the pin at 5:07.

Rating: C. This was kind of a weird match as Kennedy dominated for the most part with Benoit barely getting in any offense. I did like the recurring idea of Benoit being whipped into the corner before the big one at the end finished him off so they did have a theme to the match. This worked out well enough and Kennedy is a good potential challenger for Batista.

Post match Kennedy brags about the win but here is Teddy Long to remind us that the second half of the challenge is next week. Next week we will have MVP, Finlay, Matt Hardy and the Undertaker trying their luck, which does not sit well with Kennedy. Kennedy: “KENNEDY!”.

Commentary recaps the remaining challengers to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I love a show where there is a theme throughout the night and that was absolutely the case here. They had a good show with almost everyone working on the same angle. It was a smart idea to have something like this as the year starts, as it isn’t like the title match is going to mean given that it is at the Royal Rumble. Simple and to the point here, which might not be exciting, but it is rather safe and that is not a bad thing from time to time.

 

 

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Dynamite
Date: June 4, 2021
Location: Daily’s Place, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Jim Ross, Excalibur, Tony Schiavone

We’re done with Double Or Nothing and things are on a bit of a roll around here. I’m curious to see how they follow up on a pretty awesome pay per view which saw the Inner Circle survive by winning Stadium Stampede over the Pinnacle. There are a few directions they can take before All Out in September so let’s get to it.

Here is Double Or Nothing if you need a recap.

Penta El Zero Miedo/Pac vs. Young Bucks

Non-title and apparently the Bucks attacked Rey Fenix before the match, including a bunch of V Triggers. Michael Nakazawa, Brandon Cutler and the Good Brothers are here but cue Frankie Kazarian to jump Nakazawa, causing the Brothers to chase him off. Don Callis joins commentary as Pac and Penta (looking Jokerish tonight) hit big dives to the floor. A pair of backdrops keep the Bucks in trouble and they head inside for the opening bell.

Penta comes in to roll Matt up for two with Nick making the save and ragging Matt to the corner. Pac comes in to hit a standing shooting star press for two on Matt but the Bucks set him outside. Matt takes forever to load up the dive, then runs outside and goes to the floor for a running clothesline instead. Back in and Matt spears Pac down to hammer away but a few shots allow the tag off to Penta. A Backstabber takes Nick down and Pac’s pop up powerbomb gets two.

Penta adds a Canadian Destroyer to send Nick into the corner. Matt comes back in with a Canadian Destroyer of his own and everyone winds up on the same apron. Nick German suplexes Pac and Penta Fear Factors Matt, leaving Nick to fight Penta back inside. The referee gets poked in the eye so Nick pulls off Penta’s mask, revealing a second mask. That means a low blow into the Fear Factor, setting up Pac’s Black Arrow for two as Matt dives back in for the save. Pac goes up again but Brandon Cutler hits him in the leg, allowing Nick to grab a rollup pin at 9:42.

Rating: C+. Yeah of course they did. Is there any surprise that the Bucks survive multiple finishers (including one on the apron) to win in the end? I barely blinked off the near fall because the Bucks could get launched out of a cannon into a brick wall and kick out at 2 and a half. Such is life in the Bucks’ matches, even if it means pinning Pac in the process.

Post match the beatdown seems ready to continue but Eddie Kingston runs in for the save.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

Tony Schiavone brings out Mark Henry for his big debut. Henry talks about how how he isn’t here to fix AEW because it isn’t broken. Instead he will be here because he loves wrestling and it is time to see what he can offer. Tony asks if Henry is going to get back in the ring, but Henry can’t say yes to that yet. What he can say is that he has a lot left in the tank but here is Vickie Guerrero to interrupt. She has a surprise for us tonight…..and here is Andrade El Idolo. Well that’s a good surprise. Andrade is here to be the new face of AEW and Vickie demands some applause.

QT Marshall/Anthony Ogogo vs. Cody Rhodes/Lee Johnson

Johnson hits Marshall in the face to start and a quick dropkick gets two. Ogogo comes in and takes Cody into the corner but it’s right back to Johnson for a neckbreaker on Marshall. Johnson gets dropped on the floor though and we take a break. Back with Johnson sending Marshall outside, allowing Cody to come back in and hammer away.

The powerslam sets up the Figure Four on Marshall but Ogogo makes the save with a frog splash. A Diamond Cutter gets two on Cody with Johnson making a save of his own. The Cross Rhodes is loaded up but here is Aaron Solow to offer a distraction. Ogogo punches Cody out and Marshall gets the pin at 9:21.

Rating: C. Ogogo continues to get a push, though it is still hard to make myself care about anything Marshall does, especially with him in charge of a group. He isn’t interesting and doesn’t stand out in any way, though at least Ogogo looked like a star with the big right hand. Granted he should have gotten the pin at Double Or Nothing, but I’ll take this.

Post match Marshall shouts at Tony Schiavone about how he told him so.

We look at the Inner Circle winning Stadium Stampede.

Here is the Inner Circle for a chat. Chris Jericho brags about the win and has a gift for everyone here: an Inner Circle Stadium Stampede t-shirt! Well that’s pretty cool. Jericho hands it off to Sammy Guevara, who won the match for them on Sunday. Sammy talks about hitting a 630 to win, just like he used to do off of his mom’s house (Sammy: “Hi mom!”). He can’t believe he got to do it at Double Or Nothing and is so proud that they won.

We get the big hug, followed by Santana promising that this isn’t over because FTR tried to take their careers. Jake Hager says this isn’t over until the Inner Circle says it is over and calls out Wardlow to fight him in an MMA cage. Jericho isn’t done though because thinking of every member of the Pinnacle makes him mad.

The worst of them all is MJF though, because he tried to end Jericho’s career and his life. He thinks about it every day and wakes up in a cold sweat. MJF calls Jericho the greatest of all time and Jericho doesn’t know about that, but he does think that if he wants to keep moving forward, he has to beat MJF. That is exactly what he is going to do, and the middle finger salute wraps it up. It was a fired up promo, but I’m not wild on another huge gimmick match coming and going as little more than a pit stop in the feud.

The Best Friends say this isn’t over between Orange Cassidy and Kenny Omega.

Kenny Omega and Don Callis are ready to blow the lid off of this conspiracy to get the AEW World Title off of Omega next week. Omega isn’t worried about his title defense against Jungle Boy either. They hum along to Boy’s theme song for a bonus. My only conclusion to this: I never need to hear of a conspiracy on a wrestling show again.

Jungle Boy/Christian Cage vs. Private Party

Matt Hardy is here too. Private Party, in street/club clothes, takes over on Boy’s arm to start but he flips over Kassidy and kicks Quen in the ribs. A double springboard wristdrag sends Private Party outside and it’s off to Christian. Hardy offers a distraction though and Quen knocks Christian down as we take a break.

Back with Private Party mocking the five second pose and taking Boy off the apron. Christian manages a double reverse DDT, allowing the tag back to Boy. A brainbuster gets two on Quen and Kassidy has to break up the Snare Trap. Kassidy pokes Boy in the eyes and rolls him up for two but Christian breaks up the Gin and Juice. The Snare Trap makes Quen trap at 11:20.

Rating: C. This worked well as a way to set up Boy’s title shot against Omega later this month. The best way to make him look like a threat is to give him win after win and that is what they had here. Some singles wins would be better, but Boy looked and felt like a star here and that is the right idea.

Post match Hardy hits a Twist of Fate to drop Christian on the ramp.

Taz promises that Team Taz is going to wreck Hangman Page and someone from the Dark Order. Ricky Starks walks off in the middle.

Tony Schiavone brings out Sting and Darby Allin for a chat. Sting talks about how he has a lot of memories in wrestling but he will never forget what he did at Double Or Nothing. The fans let him know that HE STILL HAS IT but Scorpio Sky and Ethan Page pop up on screen to mock both of the two of them. They have a challenge: Allin can go find anyone but Sting and prove them wrong. Allin pulls the mic up but doesn’t bother to say anything.

A bunch of people are in the ring (complete with a table of cheeseburgers) for Britt Baker’s official championship celebration. Baker is very pleased with everyone being here and says everyone is getting a coupon for a free burger. Actually never mind as they are all on the table for her, because she did all of the work. She promised that this was the start of an all new era and she was absolutely right.

It is the start of the DMD era and now it’s time for the burgers, but only two of them are allowed. Tony and Rebel are the only ones allowed to have them, but Nyla Rose throws them away. The heavy sigh at the idea of Rose probably getting ANOTHER title shot sums it up as well as anything else I can say here.

Pac and Penta ask Eddie Kingston what was up with that save. Kingston says the enemy of his enemy is his friend.

Bunny vs. Red Velvet

Blade is here with Bunny. A cheap shot from Bunny doesn’t works as Velvet kicks her down and hits a splash for two. Bunny is sent outside and Velvet hits a dive, almost landing on her head (and making me cringe harder than I have in a long time). Thankfully she pops back up and chokes in the corner, only to get superkicked off the top.

Another superkick sends Velvet outside and we take a break. Back with Velvet hitting some clotheslines but Bunny superkicks her down. Blade offers a distraction so KiLynn King and Big Swole protest. The distraction lets Blade send in the brass knuckles but Bunny walks into Just Desserts for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here outside of another match with a good chunk taking place during the break. Velvet’s continued development is still nice to see as she has come a VERY long way in the last few months. Bunny has more or less vanished from the big shows, but she has enough of a reputation to matter a bit. She might be better served as a manager though, as it seems to work out better for her.

The Dark Order is fired up for John Silver’s birthday because Tony Khan has given him a TNT Title shot. He’s hurt though, so Evil Uno can have it instead! Uno promises to make the team proud.

Miro thanks God for his power and his wife for being hot. He isn’t worried about Uno because he is bigger, stronger and faster. You come after him when you can’t survive.

Here’s what’s coming next week.

Dustin Rhodes vs. Nick Comoroto

Bullrope match and you win by pinfall or submission. Aaron Solow is here with Comoroto and the brawl starts on the ramp before the bell. Rhodes is thrown inside and the rope is tied up, meaning we can officially start. Comoroto chokes with the rope on the apron as JR longs for the days of headlocks. Rhodes comes back with a Cactus Clothesline to the floor and they head into the crowd.

Fuego del Sol gets shoved down by Comoroto and then tossed onto some chairs, allowing Rhodes to send them back to ringside. A powerslam plants Comoroto on the floor but he comes back with a bell shot to the face. Comoroto comes up bleeding from the head as Rhodes is barely able to stand. Rhodes posts him but gets dropped onto the apron as we take a break.

Back with Solow putting up a table on the floor but Rhodes hits Comoroto in the face with the rope. That just earns him a powerbomb through the table for two back inside so Solow gets on the apron and removes the turnbuckle pad. Cue Colton Gunn to beat up Solow as Rhodes hits a bulldog and the Final Reckoning on the cowbell….for one. A low blow staggers Comoroto and it’s a middle rope bulldog to put him down again. Rhodes gets smart and hogties him for the pin at 10:08.

Rating: C-. I don’t think this was anything more than a way to close out the show, as it seems AEW figured out that not a lot of fans are going to stick around until midnight on a Friday. There is nothing wrong with that, but I can sympathize with JR not liking another violent match. This is the first time these two have fought and they go right to the violent stuff. Just let it build up a bit first and save the violence for later. Also, Rhodes wins here? Over this monster caveman who looked untouchable for most of the match?

Overall Rating: C. They definitely took a bit of a breather this week and that is a good idea. It makes sense as they have a long way to go before they get to another major show and you don’t want to run through everything. Throw in the fact that these Friday shows are not going to draw a big audience (not AEW’s fault) and there is little reason to put a lot on them. They did the right thing by front loading it too, so they seem to be learning a bit.

Results

Young Bucks b. Penta El Zero Miedo/Pac – Rollup to Pac

Anthony Ogogo/QT Marshall b. Cody Rhodes/Lee Johnson – Right hand to Rhodes

Jungle Boy/Christian Cage b. Private Party – Snare Trap to Quen

Red Velvet b. Bunny – Just Desserts

Dustin Rhodes b. Nick Comoroto – Middle rope bulldog

 

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Smackdown
Date: December 22, 2006
Location: Hampton Coliseum, Hampton, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We are done with Armageddon and pretty much a grand total of nothing happened. The main event saw John Cena joining forces with Batista to beat King Booker and Finlay. Other than that, Kane and Undertaker beat up MVP and Mr. Kennedy to presumably end both of those feuds. That means we have about a month to get to the Royal Rumble so let’s get to it.

Here is Armageddon if you need a recap.

King Booker, Queen Sharmell and Finlay are in Teddy Long’s office and demanding a rematch with Batista and John Cena. That isn’t happening, but they can have Kane and Undertaker instead. This does not go well.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Batista to get things going. He wishes us a Happy Holidays and even has red trunks on in celebration. It was a good ending to the year and he is going to start the new year even better, because he is World Heavyweight Champion. Cue Santa Claus (JBL: “I don’t need presents. I’m rich.”) with some presents, including a shirt and Roddy Piper DVD for Cole. Batista gets some candy canes, which he throws into the crowd, but Santa hits him in his bad arm with a pipe. Cue Teddy Long and the match is on.

Santa Claus vs. Batista

Santa charges in and goes after the arm, including slamming it into the apron. Batista uses the good arm to hit a clothesline and spear, which reveals that it’s Sylvan as Santa. The spinebuster and Batista Bomb finish Santa in a hurry. This was harmless Christmas fun.

We look at Chris Benoit retaining the US Title over Chavo Guerrero at Armageddon.

Tribute to the Troops video.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo is defending and has Vickie Guerrero with him. The fans are all over Chavo as he pounds away in the corner to start. That earns him a hard whip into another corner and the snap suplex gives Benoit two. Back up and Chavo gets in some forearms, setting up a whip into the corner of his own. A small package gives Benoit two and there’s the first German suplex. Another is blocked though and they fall outside as we take a break.

Back with Chavo holding a waistlock until Benoit belly to back suplexes his way to freedom. An over the shoulder backbreaker gives Chavo two but he has to break out of a quick Sharpshooter attempt. Benoit tries it again but gets kicked away again, allowing Chavo to hit a running knee to the ribs. Some chops have Chavo staggered though and there are the rolling German suplexes. The Swan Dive gets two and the Crossface goes on, drawing in Vickie with the title for the DQ.

Rating: C. I’m not quite sure why we needed a rematch here but the ending might set them up for another rematch. I don’t think the feud has that kind of legs, though that has never stopped WWE before. Maybe they have some kind of twist coming for it later, but for now, this is losing steam in a hurry.

Post match Benoit stares Vickie down but walks away without going near her. Chavo yells at Vickie and knocks her down himself. Benoit comes back in to check on Vickie and gets jumped by Chavo.

King Booker is worried about the tag match tonight but Finlay says they can do this. That’s enough to convince Booker.

Here is Gregory Helms for a chat. Helms says he is ready to move up to the heavyweight division because he needs some competition….and here is Boogeyman to interrupt. Helms’ shots to the back do nothing so he runs away from the threat of worms. Ring announcer Tony Chimmel says Boogeyman’s catchphrase for no logical reason and gets wormed instead.

Here is Joey Mercury, whose face looks horrible after Sunday’s ladder match, for a chat. Mercury talks about his injuries and we see what happened, which is even worse in slow motion. He holds the Hardys responsible for what happened because he has lost 50% of the vision in his left eye. His movie star good looks are gone and it might be forever!

Cue Matt Hardy, to say no one meant for this to happen. It was a ladder match for the Tag Team Titles and that’s a dangerous place to be. Any of them could have been hurt and that is the price you could pay, but nothing was intentional. Matt goes to leave but Mercury doesn’t like Matt saying it was “unfortunate”. The challenge is on but Matt isn’t going to fight someone as banged up as Mercury is right now. That’s fine with Mercury, because Matt can fight this guy.

Matt Hardy vs. Johnny Nitro

Melina is here with Nitro, who jumps Matt before the bell. The beating is on in a hurry with Matt falling out to the floor, where Nitro stays on him in a hurry. Back in and Matt hits a bulldog for two but Nitro is back with some right hands to the face. Nitro grabs a ladder from underneath the ring (this can’t end well) and we take a break.

Back with Hardy knocking him down and they get a quick breather (and the ladder nowhere in sight). It’s Hardy getting back up first but Melina grabs his foot, allowing Nitro to hit an enziguri out to the floor. The springboard kick to the face misses though and they’re both down again. Some knees and a kick to the face give Hardy two and a neckbreaker sets up the middle rope legdrop for two. Nitro comes right back with a backslide and throws his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C. Perfectly logical match here, though I’m not sure how much vindication there is for Mercury to have Nitro win with a backslide. The ladder part was kind of weird as it just came and went with nothing changing. There are a few ways they could go with this, but until Mercury is back healthy, it is going to be Nitro on his own, assuming he doesn’t get a new partner. Mercury’s face alone gives it some interest though and that’s a good thing.

Here is JBL in the ring for a chat. He isn’t happy with Teddy Long bringing back all these horrible matches, including the Inferno match. On Sunday, we saw a man burning (with JBL referring to MVP as a corpse) and he had to be put out. That is Long’s doing so JBL wants him out here right now for an apology.

Long doesn’t show up, so JBL blames the fans, going into a rant about how they keep demanding more, no matter what happens to the wrestlers. Rome did not fall because of the gladiators but because of the sick people in the stands. No one will pay to see them though, and they might even bring down America. JBL can sell something like this, though this feels like it is going to be the start of something long.

Ashley/Layla vs. Krystal/Jillian Hall

Ashley slams Krystal down to start as we hear about Ashley’s Playboy short. JBL complains about the lack of closeups of Layla as Jillian knees her down and sends her head first into the mat a few times. Jillian’s handspring elbow hits raised boots in the corner and it’s off to Ashley to clean house. Everything breaks down and Krystal breaks up a monkey flip out of the corner. Layla breaks up a monkey flip though and Ashley drops a middle rope elbow for the pin.

Rating: D. You can only get so annoyed at four women who were given the bare minimum of training and then sent out there on national TV. As usual, this was about getting the good looking women in revealing outfits in the ring so you can only get so mad at the whole thing. Bad match of course, but were you expecting anything else?

Vladimir Kozlov is very excited and shouts in Russian a lot.

King Booker/Finlay vs. Kane/Undertaker

Queen Sharmell is here with Booker/Finlay. Booker ducks a clothesline from Undertaker to start but the stalking is on in a hurry. Undertaker hammers him down in the corner and lifts Booker up by one arm. Old School connects with Booker but he breaks up the same thing to Finlay. A top rope superplex brings Undertaker back down for two and it’s off to Finlay for….actually for a kind of intriguing match.

Undertaker catches him with a running DDT and Kane comes in to clean house. Uppercuts abound and the side slam gets two on Booker. The threat of double chokeslams send the villains outside and us to a break. Back with Kane choking Booker in the corner, allowing Undertaker to add the apron legdrop. Finlay breaks up a cover but Kane is fine enough to drag Booker into the corner to keep up the beating. Booker gets in a shot to the face and brings Finlay back in, where he walks into Snake Eyes.

The big boot drops Finlay again but Booker low bridges Undertaker to the floor. Apparently Kane got a tag in there somewhere (Cole is confused as well) and Booker dropkicks him out of the air. Finlay drops Undertaker on the floor and goes inside for a chinlock. Booker takes Finlay’s place and chairs Undertaker down, with the distraction allowing Finlay to hit Kane with the shillelagh. Kane kicks Booker down though and somehow Undertaker is back up to get the hot tag. House is cleaned in a hurry and the Tombstone (Cole: “This may make Finlay think he’s an Englishman!”) finishes Finlay.

Rating: C-. Not awful here, but it was pretty clear that they wanted to get done with this and take their Christmas vacation. It isn’t like losing to Undertaker and Kane is going to hurt Booker and Finlay, the latter of whom more or less exists for the sake of taking losses. Booker is already falling down the Smackdown depth chart, but I’m curious to see where all four of them go from here.

Overall Rating: C-. This was far from a serious show, but it was hardly some disaster. They dealt with some fallout from the pay per view and did just enough to make it feel like a regular TV show. Nothing was too horrible and odds are next week is a Best Of show anyway, meaning it’s off to 2007 from here.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: December 15, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden Arena, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the go home show for Armageddon and that isn’t exactly giving me hope for this week. The big story this week is Undertaker and Kane vs. MVP/Mr. Kennedy as the two long running feuds merge into one for a change. The rest of the show might not be all that great, but that has never stopped Smackdown before. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Raw’s John Cena to get things going. Cena knows that the question on everyone’s mind is where is Parts Unknown, but they also might be wondering why he is here on Smackdown. He does know that, and it’s because of three reasons. First of all, he lives here, which is why his father is ringside. After a hug to his dad, Cena says there was no way he was going to miss a show here.

It’s Christmas time though and WWE runs a Secret Santa game with its employees. This time around, Cena got Michael Cole, and managed to get him everything he wanted: a salami, a shirtless picture of David Hasselhoff, and a bag of salty nuts. With that gag out of the way, Cena talks about Armageddon (which is his favorite Def Leppard song) and how important the tag team match is going to be.

Cue King Booker and Finlay, who promise to give Cena the same beating they gave to Batista last week. Cena is ready to fight but here is a taped up Batista for the save. Cue Teddy Long to make it a singles match playa, with Cena vs. Finlay set for later, which thankfully means we don’t have another Booker vs. Batista match.

William Regal/Dave Taylor/Gregory Helms vs. Brian Kendrick/Paul London/Jimmy Want Yang

Take two title feuds, throw them into one match. London and Helms start things off with London cranking on an armbar. Kendrick comes in for a front facelock but Regal gets in a cheap shot from behind to take over. Taylor adds a suplex as commentary talks Ashley being more than friendly with London and Kendrick.

It’s off to Regal for some knees and a chinlock, followed by the suplex into the corner. An uppercut knocks Kendrick down again and Helms comes back in for a front facelock. A missed charge lets Kendrick kick Taylor in the head though and the hot tag brings in Yang to clean house. Regal and Taylor have had enough and walk out, leaving Yang to hit a moonsault press for the pin on Helms.

Rating: C-. This didn’t have the time to do much with so many people involved but they did a basic story well enough. Kendrick takes a good beating and it was smart to let Yang get the pin over Helms to suggest even the possibility of a title change. Of course that is pretty much guaranteed to not happen, but it’s a nice way to go here.

Clip from the Armageddon press conference, the high point of many a journalist’s resume.

Matt Hardy vs. Joey Mercury

No seconds here, which is kind of weird to see. Commentary immediately ignores the match to talk about Tribute to the Troops on Christmas night as Mercury takes Hardy into the corner to start. That is broken up in a hurry but Mercury hammers away against the ropes, being a bit more aggressive than usual here. Mercury knocks him down and grabs a chinlock, followed by a neckbreaker for no cover. A knockoff screaming elbow gets two on Hardy, who fights up at the idea of gimmick infringement. Hardy hits a clothesline of his own into the real screaming middle rope elbow and the Twist of Fate finishes Mercury.

Rating: C. I’m not sure how to process the idea of a clean match like this one but it worked out fine. Hardy is the bigger name here and it isn’t like anyone cares about Mercury as a singles wrestler in the first place. That being said, since there isn’t a match set for either of the teams or their individual members, this was a bit of a strange use of Smackdown time.

Video on the history of the Inferno match.

MVP tells his agent to get him out of the Inferno match but here is Mr. Kennedy to interrupt. The argument is on, with the two of them explaining the idea of their matches on Sunday.

MVP/Mr. Kennedy vs. Undertaker/Kane

MVP gets scared by the fire during his own entrance, which I’m not sure I remember being there before. Kennedy slowly opens the door of the hearse in the aisle and finds nothing, which doesn’t mean much around here. Joined in progress with Kane stomping Kennedy into the corner and then lifting him into the air for the choking. A rake to the eyes allows for the tag off to MVP, who is side slammed down in a hurry. The top rope clothesline makes it even worse and Undertaker comes in to unload in the corner.

Kennedy finally does something worthwhile by offering a distraction to break up Old School and Undertaker gets stomped down for a change. Undertaker is right back with right hands to MVP in the corner though and now Old School connects. Kane tags himself in and the brothers hit some big boots. The double chokeslam plants Kennedy but MVP saves him from the Tombstone. Undertaker stalks MVP to the back as Kennedy and Kane fight on the floor for the double countout.

Rating: C-. This was the teaser trailer for Sunday and that’s all it needed to be. We’ve seen these four fight in various combinations for weeks now and there isn’t much left to do than have the big blowoff matches at the pay per view. I’m glad they didn’t waste time on a long match before the ending either, so while this might not have been very good, it was at least efficient.

Post match Kennedy sends Kane into the steps and gets in the hearse. Kennedy revs the engine but the lights go out, allowing Undertaker to appear in the driver’s seat. That sends Kennedy and MVP running….right into Kane as he sits up for a pretty funny moment. The villains run off in a hurry.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Funaki

Vickie Guerrero is here with Chavo and Funaki gets the jobber’s entrance, likely because he is a jobber. Before the match, Chavo calls out Chris Benoit to apologize for hurting Vickie. Benoit comes out (looking odd in a suit) and says he isn’t apologizing for anything so Chavo beats on Funaki to vent some frustration. A pair of belly to back suplexes have Funaki in trouble and, after shrugging off a few kicks, Chavo plants him with the brainbuster. The frog splash finishes Funaki in a hurry.

Post match Benoit comes in and puts Chavo in the Sharpshooter. Vickie comes in and gets in Benoit’s face, causing him to get up and Vickie to curl up into a screaming ball without being touched.

Video on Tribute to the Troops, set to a Creed song.

Vito vs. Sylvan

Merry freaking Christmas. Cole talks about Vito trying to force himself on him and I think we might need to hear more about that. Vito hammers away to start but gets backdropped to the apron and clotheslined out to the floor. JBL’s jokes continue to abound as Vito makes the comeback, pulls up the dress (thankfully revealing trunks instead of the thong), and drops a leg for two. Vito walks into a Samoan drop but pops up for an O’Connor roll to finish Sylvan.

Rating: D. This was back to the old stuff for Vito, which wasn’t funny in the first place and wasn’t exactly good here either. It is pretty clear that the hype he had is gone, but at least they kept it short. JBL’s jokes and the whole idea have not exactly aged well, but it isn’t like Vito is being treated as a big deal in the first place.

Armageddon rundown.

Here are the Miz and Kristal to prove that Miz is not afraid of Boogeyman. Tonight, he is going to eat some scary foods to show just how fearless he really is. First up, Miz eats some pig’s tongue, followed by monkey brains….but he can’t eat the worms on plate three. Then Boogeyman pops up through the plate to scare them off.

Finlay vs. John Cena

Non-title. Finlay grabs a quick headlock and then runs Cena over with a shoulder. That’s enough to start Cena back up and he runs Finlay down, followed by an elbow. Finlay is right back with a clothesline into a nerve hold, followed by a rip to the face. Cena fights up with a belly to belly for two, only to have Finlay run him over again and send Cena face first into the apron.

As commentary talks about Vince McMahon being the first Irish champion, the Leprechaun pops out and is promptly thrown at JBL. Finlay decks Cena and puts the Leprechaun back underneath the ring as we take a break. Back with Finlay hitting another running clothesline and sitting on Cena’s chest for two. Finlay’s armbar keeps Cena down for a bit and he pulls Cena down into the Fujiwara version to make it even worse.

Back up and Cena wins a strike out but Finlay rakes the eyes to escape the FU. Cena doesn’t seem to mind and hits the ProtoBomb into the Shuffle but Finlay goes back to the bad arm. The Celtic Cross gets two so here’s the Leprechaun again, allowing Finlay to grab a chair. Cena kicks that back into his face though and it’s the FU for the pin.

Rating: B-. Finlay continues his series of good jobs as the upper midcard brawler that bigger stars have a bit of trouble beating. That is a fine spot to be in as Finlay is tough enough to make the matches work without feeling like a threat to jump up to the next level. Good main event here, and it’s rather nice to see the hometown boy get to have a big win for a change. And they even tossed around a leprechaun!

Post match here’s Booker to double team Cena but Batista makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Your taste may vary here as they did a nice enough job building up the pay per view, but the pay per view isn’t that interesting in the first place. It is very clear that the show is going to be built around the two gimmick matches with the main event tag match being thrown in to have a main event level match. This show wasn’t too bad, but it isn’t something you need to see, much like Sunday’s show.

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Smackdown
Date: December 1, 2006
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It is the first show after Survivor Series and the big Smackdown story is Batista taking the World Title back from King Booker. That means it is time to start getting ready for Armageddon in a few weeks, so we need to set up some stuff. With so little time left before the show, we might be getting ready for the show this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Teddy Long in the ring to hype up Armageddon on December 17. That sounds like a good place to announce some matches, so we’ll have Kane vs. MVP in an Inferno match and Mr. Kennedy vs. the Undertaker in a Last Ride match. That is in a few weeks though, so for now let’s bring out Batista. The new champ is rather happy to have his title back, though JBL goes on a rant about how Batista didn’t climb some mountain to become champion again. It took Batista eleven months to get the title back and now all is right with the world.

Cue King Booker and Queen Sharmell, whose ALL HAIL’s have lost some steam. Booker says it takes some nerve to stand in the ring with his title, because Batista stole it. Teddy Long helped him steal the title by changing the stipulations right before the match began. Then Batista had to cheat to win to win the title (yeah) so tonight, the rematch clause is being invoked. Batista is ready to fight now but here is Finlay to interrupt. Finlay says Booker doesn’t deserve a rematch because he hasn’t beaten him yet, so it should be Finlay vs. Batista. Teddy thinks they both have a point so let’s have a triple threat match for the title.

MNM vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick

Non-title and Melina/Ashley are here as the seconds. As a bonus, we’re told that Ashley is next year’s Wrestlemania Playboy girl. London and Kendrick take turns knocking Nitro down to start with Kendrick coming in off the top to elbow the arm. The double dives hit MNM but Kendrick misses a high crossbody back inside. London has to make an early save so Nitro slaps on the chinlock with a bodyscissors. That’s broken up so Kendrick gets over to London for a double high crossbody. Everything breaks down and here are Dave Taylor and William Regal to jump London. That’s enough to set up the Snapshot to put London away.

Rating: C. This is a match I could go for on the bigger stage. I know London and Kendrick took the titles from MNM in the first place but they have come so far in the time since the title change that it could be a classic if they did it again. It’s kind of shame that MNM is only back for a short run, because they could give the division a much needed boost. Nitro has come a long way on his own though and I think WWE figured out his potential a long time ago.

We look at Mr. Kennedy beating Undertaker in the First Blood match at Survivor Series.

Kennedy comes up to MVP in the back and yells at him for swinging the chair. They argue over their matches at Armageddon and Kennedy calls him an idiot. Things are not quite cool here.

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Finlay vs. Batista

Batista is defending and Queen Sharmell is here with Booker. Batista punches them both down to start and takes over, including a Regal Roll to Finlay. The ring is cleared of challengers and we take a break. Back with Finlay working over Batista, including the elbow to the chest. JBL: “These guys would smack their mama right now to win a World Title.” Booker gets knocked outside again and Finlay plants Batista for a close two.

The chinlock goes on for a bit, followed by some boots to Batista’s head. Finlay grabs the chinlock again but Batista fights up and hits a MuscleBuster for two. Booker comes back in to kick Batista in the back for two of his own, followed by the catapult into the bottom rope for the same. Finlay makes a save this time and it’s time for the villainous staredown. Booker gets the better of the brawl and Sharmell rakes the eyes to put Batista on the floor.

Back in and Booker gets two on Batista, meaning it’s time for the double teaming. Finlay throws Booker off for daring to cover before slapping on a chinlock. With that broken up, Finlay grabs the Shillelagh but the referee makes him put it down, as this triple threat has DQ’s. Cue the Leprechaun….but Batista stares him to the floor. Now the Shillelagh shot to the knee can get two on Batista and Finlay grabs the half crab. That’s broken up by Booker’s superkick but Finlay knocks Batista down. The spear into the Batista Bomb finishes Finlay to retain the title.

Rating: C+. Not a classic or anything but it got time and felt like a match that meant something. Giving Batista a title defense right out of the gate makes up for some of the belt shot title win and keeps open the door for Batista vs. Booker II. If nothing else, it is always cool to see the title on the line in a match with some weight so this was a nice surprise.

Post break, Booker and Finlay yell at Teddy Long, who doesn’t want to hear it. Therefore, at Armageddon, it’s Booker/Finlay vs. Batista/a partner of his choosing.

We look back at Chris Benoit retaining the US Title over Chavo Guerrero after accidentally knocking Vickie Guerrero off the apron.

Vickie and Chavo call Benoit a woman beater and swear revenge.

Chris Benoit vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Vickie Guerrero, in a neck brace, is here. Benoit knocks him down to start but gets elbowed in the face for an early two. The rolling German suplexes send Chavo outside, where he hides behind Vickie as we take a break. Back with Chavo sending him face first into the middle buckle and slapping on an abdominal stretch. That’s broken up and Benoit starts the comeback with a backdrop into a chop for two.

Chavo tries to get up top but gets superplexed right back down in a nasty landing. The Sharpshooter attempt is broken up so the Crossface sends Chavo crawling to the ropes. Back up and Benoit tries an O’Connor roll but gets kicked almost into Vickie. This time Benoit puts the brakes on and Chavo rolls him up with tights for the pin.

Rating: C. There’s your setup for the rematch and that’s all it needed to be. They even played off of Sunday’s ending here for a nice bonus. It isn’t a great match or anything but it served its purpose and the pay per view rematch should be better. Now just stop talking about Benoit being such a monster and the next match will be easier to watch.

Batista seems to have picked a partner.

Layla vs. Kristal Marshall

Layla grabs a headlock to start but an attempted hammerlock doesn’t go very far. Kristal gets sent outside but comes back in for a slam as commentary talks about Playboy. A Hennig necksnap gives Kristal two so she grabs Layla by the hair and slams her head first into the mat for the pin. This was one of the worst matches I can remember in a long time.

Batista picks John Cena.

Raw Rebound.

MVP vs. Undertaker

MVP immediately starts begging off but gets taken into the corner to start the beating. A running clothesline lets Undertaker hammer away in the corner and Old School connects (JBL: “That is completely unnatural.”). MVP kicks him in the face and the glare is on in a hurry. There’s the jumping clothesline to drop MVP again and the turnbuckle pad is ripped off.

A few rights and lefts slow Undertaker down for a bit but he is right back with a clothesline. Snake Eyes into the big boot lets Undertaker grab a chair. MVP goes to run but here is Mr. Kennedy to throw him back in….but MVP reverses and sends Kennedy inside instead. Cue Kane as I think the match has been thrown out.

Rating: C-. This was a total squash until the no contest, though it is at least a match that felt fresh. They very well could do another match between them down the line and it would be a fine way to headline one of the next two Smackdowns. What we got here was fine enough for the short form, though it does feel like it’s a match that was there to fill in time and little more.

Kane and Undertaker clean house but the threat of a double chokeslam sends the villains running to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I don’t remember the last time that they set up three major matches for the pay per view, plus a few other matches that you can see coming from here, for a pay per view in a single night. They did what they should have done with their time here and the World Title match was pretty good in its own right. Good, effective show here and it was nice to see something efficient like this one.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: November 10, 2006
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re done with Cyber Sunday and that means it is time to get on the road to Survivor Series. The big story coming out of the pay per view is King Booker not only keeping the World Heavyweight Title but also becoming the Champion of Champions. That means he needs a new challenger and odds are we find that out tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here is Cyber Sunday if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Booker retaining the title thanks to Kevin Federline.

Here are King Booker and Queen Sharmell for a chat. Booker talks about how he kept the title but alas, like Alexander the Great, he has no worlds left to conquer. He lists off some names he has beaten but here is Teddy Long to interrupt. Long brings a bunch of photographers for some photos of Booker because we need to celebrate his victory.

Booker agrees that he defeated everyone when his back was against the wall, but last week there was someone protecting him. That would be Batista, and Long owes him a big favor. As a result, Batista is getting a title shot at Survivor Series, but it might not be against Booker, because he is defending the title right now. Booker: “I’LL SUE YOU!”

Smackdown World Title: King Booker vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley is challenging and drives Booker into the corner for the shoulders to the ribs. The Fujiwara armbar goes on to keep Booker in trouble but he fights to his feet. That earns him a clothesline to the floor and we take a break. Back with Booker firing off knees in the corner as we hear about Lashley being on Team Cena at Survivor Series against Team Big Show.

Lashley comes back with the delayed vertical suplex (with JBL saying it reminded him of Rick Rude) but Booker avoids a charge to send Lashley’s shoulder into the post. Booker crotches him against the post for a bonus and a superkick gets two. The armbar stays on the bad arm but Lashley is up in a hurry, meaning Booker has to kick him in the face. Now it’s a shinbreaker to keep Lashley down again and we hit the spinning toehold of all things.

A small package gives Lashley two so Booker clotheslines him right back down. Back up and Booker’s leapfrog is powerslammed out of the air for a heck of a crash and a near fall. Sharmell offers a distraction though and Booker gets in a thumb to the eye. Lashley shrugs that off too but another Sharmell distraction lets Booker roll him up with trunks to retain.

Rating: C+. This was a bit rushed but they did their thing well enough. Booker cheating to win makes sense but it isn’t like Lashley was going to get the title so soon after Booker had his big win on Sunday anyway. I had fun with it and Booker did everything he could to make Lashley’s offense look great. That’s how you make someone look better in defeat and it is what happened here.

Post match Booker goes for the ax kick but Lashley clotheslines him down instead.

We get the first (of likely many) videos on the history of Batista vs. Finlay.

Here’s what John Cena has done to promote the Marine.

MVP comes in to Teddy Long’s office to complain about last week, but Long is about to watch the DVD of See No Evil (with DELETED SCENES). That isn’t cool with MVP, who mentions being from the streets. That’s cool with Teddy, who gives him a street fight with Kane next week.

Chris Benoit comes up to Chavo Guerrero and Vickie Guerrero and asks what happened to them. He asks if this is about Eddie’s estate but Vickie tells him to worry about something more important. Like Chavo taking the US Title at Survivor Series.

Jimmy Wang Yang/Matt Hardy vs. Sylvan/Gregory Helms

I feel like I’m watching a Lethal Lottery show. Helms chokes Yang as JBL rants about how much he can’t stand Yang at all. A backbreaker sets up a chinlock but Hardy comes in for the save, allowing Yang to be double teamed. Sylvan comes in for some knees to the chest and Helms whips Yang hard into the corner. A dropkick into a belly to back slam gets two on Yang, who spinwheel kicks Sylvan out of the air. The hot tag brings in Hardy to hammer on Helms and plant him with a Side Effect. Everything breaks down and Sylvan is sent outside, allowing Hardy to hit the Twist of Fate from the top to finish Helms.

Rating: C-. Perfectly fine enough match here, even with Hardy vs. Helms seemingly continuing for eternity. Hardy’s comeback worked well and he carried a lot more of the match than Yang, but it wasn’t like he could bring it up to another level. This felt like four people being put on the show for something to do instead of for a particular reason and that is rarely a good idea.

More on Batista vs. Finlay.

Here is Mr. Kennedy for Undertaker’s answer to a Survivor Series challenge. He talks about how Undertaker debuted sixteen years ago at Survivor Series and has made an amazing legacy for himself. That’s good, but look at what Kennedy has done in so little time. He has beaten all kinds of World Champions and is ready to move to Raw or ECW and show what else he can do, but Undertaker is standing in his way. Kennedy wants Undertaker out here right now because he is ending Undertaker’s career at Survivor Series. More taunting ensues and the gong goes off.

Undertaker does the full entrance and even takes his hat off, allowing Kennedy to hit him low. The beatdown is on with Kennedy hammering him in the head with the microphone. Undertaker is busted open and more microphone shots put him down. Kennedy gets in his face and says his own name before leaving, with Undertaker sitting up but not being able to get very far. This was a good segment for Kennedy, who set this up and then beat Undertaker down. He’ll get wrecked at Survivor Series, but it worked for him here.

Chris Benoit vs. KC James

Non-title and James has Michelle McCool with him. JBL sings McCool’s praises, saying he likes women, even if Cole doesn’t. Benoit hammers away in the corner and a knee to the ribs sends James outside. Back in and James elbows him down and grabs the chinlock with a knee in the back to keep Benoit in trouble. Benoit suplexes his way to freedom and it’s time to roll the German suplexes. The Swan Dive sets up the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: D+. No time to do much here but it was a nice way to show that Benoit is on a roll. It’s also smart to use low level tag guys like James here, because he isn’t going to be hurt by a loss to Benoit. They did things exactly as they should have here and no one was hurt, so what else can you ask them to do?

Batista is going to be on Smallville.

Boogeyman vs. TJ Dalton

Boogeyman throws him inside, catches a kick, eats some worms and finishes with the chokebomb in a hurry.

Post match, Dalton gets wormed.

Another Batista vs. Finlay video.

Kristal yells at Miz for not getting rid of Boogeyman. Worry not though as Miz will beat Boogeyman in a match next week.

One last Batista vs. Finlay video.

Batista vs. Finlay

Batista shoulders him down to start and then hits him again for a bonus. Finlay goes to the ropes so Batista pulls him back to hammer away some more. They head outside with Batista blocking a posting and hitting a clothesline. We take a break and come back with Batista holding a kneeling bearhug. More forearms in the corner have Finlay in trouble and a backdrop makes it worse.

There’s a backbreaker to keep Finlay down as this has been one sided so far. It’s back to the floor for a big boot to Finlay but the Leprechaun hits Batista in the leg with the Shillelagh. Finlay gets in a kick of his own and it’s time to work on Batista’s knee. The cranking and stomping on the knee ensues with Finlay putting on a standing leglock. Back up and Finlay misses a charge into the post and Batista hits some shoulders to the ribs.

Something like a Muscle Buster of all things drops Finlay but the knee is too banged up. Some clotheslines set up a powerslam to plant Finlay but he goes to the knee to slow Batista down again. That lasts for all of two seconds as Batista hits another clothesline for two. Cue Booker for a distraction but Batista sends Finlay into him, setting up the spinebuster for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was surprisingly one sided for a good chunk of the match as Batista dominated most of it. The knee thing didn’t mean much and Finlay never felt like a threat to win. I know Batista is on his way to the World Title shot at Survivor Series and it’s hardly bad to have him look dominant but you would expect something a little more competitive here.

Overall Rating: C. It’s nice to have Cyber Sunday out of the way so things can have a fresh focus, but there wasn’t anything important here. They mostly played it safe and didn’t try anything out of the ordinary, so we’ll call it a nice and easy first step towards the pay per view. Batista vs. Booker is the only way they could go and I’m sure the Survivor Series matches will get some nice build going forward. There’s nothing wrong with taking it nice and safe and that’s how they went here.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Wrestlemania XXX
Date: April 6, 2014
Location: Mercedes-Benz Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 75,167
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

This is a special one for me and I’m glad that it was the other requested redo. I was in the stadium for this, marking my first ever Wrestleamania live. In case you’re really new at this, the show is all about Daniel Bryan, who will be facing HHH for a spot in the main event. He’s been riding on the strength of the YES Movement for months now and this is the grand finale. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Real Americans vs. Los Matadores

The Usos are defending and this is under elimination rules. Zeb Colter introduces the Real Americans (Cesaro/Jack Swagger, which feels like it’s from forever ago). On the other hand, JBL wants to eat El Torito. Just in case you needed both sides of the spectrum there. I also forgot how much I miss the Siva Tao and the Usos’ theme. They’re just cool. Axel and Jey get things going as the fans chant WE THE PEOPLE. JBL gets in his own way by saying Colter is the greatest hero to be in New Orleans since Andrew Stonewall Jackson in 1814. You history buffs know how bad that sounds.

Axel runs Jey over with a clothesline and it’s already off to Ryback, who feels like a relic despite being in the company over two years after this. Ryback runs him over and bangs on his own chest but Diego tags himself in to cut things off. Why you would do that isn’t clear but never let that get in the way of a tag. Diego shrugs off the Usos’ double elbow and gets in an OLE! Somehow he’s still employed to this day so how can I mock him?

Cesaro tags himself in this time and the fans certainly seem to approve. A jumping back elbow puts Swagger down and Diego knocks him to the floor. The Real Americans, Ryback and the Usos are sent outside so Los Matadores him stereo dives. Axel won’t let Torito dive but Los Matadores catch him on top, allowing Torito to drive Axel onto the pile. Back in and the Patriot Lock makes Diego tap at 5:40 to get us down to three.

Axel tags himself in and snaps Jack’s neck across the top rope before running Jimmy over. Ryback gets two off a delayed vertical suplex and some knees to the back keep Jimmy in trouble. We hit the chinlock (notice the REST HOLD sign in the crowd because Wrestlemania fans think they’re rather intelligent) for a bit until Ryback is sent shoulder first into the post.

That’s enough to bring in Jey for the pop up Samoan drop on Axel. Swagger cuts him off with his belly to belly powerslam for two and it’s Ryback snapping off a string of spinebusters. The Meat Hook drops Swagger but Cesaro beaks up the Shell Shock. Cesaro isn’t done as it’s Swiss Death into the Neutralizer to eliminate Ryback and Axel at 11:47.

The fans are behind the Real Americans as we’re down to two teams. A double dive takes the Americans out but Cesaro pulls Jimmy out of the air with a backbreaker for two. It’s too early for the Swing though as Jey tags himself in. That’s fine with Cesaro, who uppercuts his head off too. Swagger grabs the Patriot Lock but Jimmy makes a save. Swiss Death drops Jimmy but Jey is back up with a Samoan drop to put everyone down. The Americans are sent into each other and it’s a double superkick into a double Superfly Splash to Cesaro to retain the titles at 16:13.

Rating: B+. Now THAT is how you do a Kickoff Show match. It was fast paced, it was energetic, the fans were into it (because the fans were already in the stadium and the wrestlers weren’t performing in front of a bunch of empty seats and 500 people) and it was a lot of fun. This match is really great stuff and it had everyone fired up for Wrestlemania. No complaints here and a heck of a performance.

Post match Swagger yells at Cesaro and blames him for the loss. Colter tells Jack to calm down but it’s a Patriot Lock to Cesaro instead. Zeb wants a handshake but Cesaro swings Jack, breaking up the team and making the fans cheer him even more. This should have been the start of a rocket push for Cesaro but it just never clicked for a variety of reasons.

The opening video starts with a man standing on a dark street when a marching band comes in. The voiceover says someone once said a good time starts when we lose track of time it is. “And man oh man, have we lost track of time.” The street fills up with people (and wrestlers, with the Bellas and their signature dance prominently featured) in a Mardi Gras style party with a Wrestlemania highlight package, both historical and modern, airing at the same time. This one didn’t click with me at first but it’s grown on me a lot over the years and now it’s amazing.

As odd as it may seem, the most exciting part of the night is the short stretch between the end of the opening video and the pyro going off. You know it’s coming and it’s just a few seconds away. That’s such a sweet feeling.

Cole: “This is Wrestlemania. Then, now and forever.”

We waste no time in introducing the host of Wrestlemania: Hulk Hogan. Well if you insist. At a milestone show like this, it would have been criminal to not have the most important man in the show’s history front and center. You can tell the fans are ALL over this as they’re losing it over every look he gives the camera. “Well let me tell you something brother” has them even more rabid and I was certainly one of them.

We get the infamous line of Hogan calling it the Silverdome (To this day I still believe that was intentional. Hogan is the oldest player in the business and what’s the big thing that people remember from this? Him slipping up on the line. Then you laugh and chuckle because it’s goofy, and Hogan looks funny in retrospective. That’s the kind of thing he would do.) and not getting why the fans are a little confused. Hogan recaps the first Wrestlemania and messes up the location again.

This time reality sets in and he makes the correction, saying he was thinking about bodyslamming Andre the Giant. Hogan promising more Wrestlemania moments, and you never know when one of those will happen. Then the glass shatters, and the place goes coconuts. I’ve seen a lot of wrestling and it takes a lot to surprise me, but I lost it at this point. This was special and WWE knew what they had here, which is why this is one of the best moments they’ve done in a very long time.

Austin hits all four corners and does a quick staredown for a very cool image. It’s good to be back here at the SILVERDOME and Austin even praises Hogan for everything he did at Wrestlemania I-X (he wasn’t at X but I can live with it here). Austin brings up the two of them wanting to protect their legacies before shaking Hogan’s hand and saying he respects Hogan and everything he’s done for the business. He hits the catchphrase…..and here’s the Rock just in case this wasn’t amazing enough already.

Rock takes his sweet time getting to the ring (it’s a four hour show so it’s acceptable) and even shows off the goosebumps. After hugs and posing, we pause for the completely appropriate THIS IS AWESOME chant. Rock says all five of his senses are on fire because you can see and hear the people, taste it and feel it and OF COURSE you can smell it because FINALLY, the Rock has come back to Wrestlemania. Which means, the three of them have finally come back to the SUPERdome. That means a SUPERDOME chant and thankfully Hogan takes it in stride.

Rock talks about seeing his good friend and his childhood hero, who are the biggest names in the history of the WWE. He’s faced them both at Wrestlemania and they’ve both had an incredible impact on that locker room. Tonight, someone is going to come out here and fight in the name of hustle, loyalty and respect (fans aren’t happy) and that doesn’t happen if Hogan hadn’t promised to say his prayers and take his vitamins. Tonight, someone is going to come out here and rise against the Authority (pause for YES chant) and that doesn’t happen if a bald headed SOB didn’t cross the boss.

Those are facts, just like so many WWE fans having birthdays nine months after Wrestlemania. It’s because of Rock you see. Rock: “Just wait for January. A lot of Rock Babies running around.” Rock even throws out some Wrestlemania rhyming before catchphrases are spoken (with Hogan making sure to say SUPERdome) and beer is consumed. I was ready to go home at this point because this couldn’t have been done better no matter who they brought out. This was special, and that’s how you start a show this important.

Oh yeah. We have three and a half hours left.

We recap HHH vs. Daniel Bryan with the incredible Monster video. The idea is that Bryan has fought his way up the card because this is all that he’s ever wanted to do. Bryan kept fighting his way up, eventually winning the World Title. HHH and Stephanie McMahon, the Authority, didn’t want someone so small and plain being the face of the WWE.

Less than five minutes after becoming champion, HHH then cost him the title, setting up a major feud. The fans would have none of this though and hijacked nearly every show, chanting for Bryan and the YES Movement all night long. Bryan knew he would have to beat HHH once and for all at Wrestlemania, but that’s not all. The winner of the match will move on to the main event for the title.

Make no mistake about it: this push and this feud played a major role in changing WWE for years to come, as the fans suddenly realized that they could power their chosen star to the top of the company. I highly, highly recommend you see this video as it’s one of the best videos WWE has ever put together. You might be noticing a trend in that direction so far tonight.

Daniel Bryan vs. HHH

Stephanie, in some very revealing shorts, introduces HHH. Now since this is Wrestlemania, HHH appears on a throne with three gorgeous masked women (Charlotte, Sasha Banks and Alexa Bliss) surrounding him. They remove his robe and armor and HHH takes off his skull helmet before the regular music comes on. As usual it’s a lot, but also as usual it’s hard to ignore the three women around him. Dang indeed. Bryan is coming in with a very bad shoulder.

After a minute of staring each other down, Bryan kicks away an offered handshake and gets two off a rollup. Some kicks in the corner have HHH in trouble and the threat of a big kick sends him bailing to the floor. Back in and a hard shoulder to Bryan’s bad shoulder puts him down but it’s a headlock takeover to put HHH down as well. HHH is completely outclassed on the mat so he drives Bryan into the corner as the DANIEL BRYAN chants start up.

A shot to the leg cuts Bryan off again but Bryan is right back up with a tornado DDT off the apron (sloppy, but it did its job) to drop HHH. Bryan follows up with a cannonball off the top to the floor and everyone is down again. Well not Stephanie of course. Like she would ever do what everyone else was doing.

Back in and Bryan gets crotched on top as Stephanie shouts that he’ll never win. They fight outside again and while HHH can’t get the Pedigree onto the announcers’ table, he can drive the shoulder into the table to really take over. Now the real arm work begins with a DDT on the arm and some good old fashioned cranking.

Bryan kicks him away for a second and loads up a suicide dive, only to get punched out of the air to keep HHH in full control. They’re doing a very good job here with the slow beatdown as you don’t want to have Bryan make his comeback too soon. It makes it that much better to give him a beating like this and let it sink in. A crossface chckenwing into a crossface (hold the chickenwing) stays on the arm but Bryan makes the rope. Bryan slugs away and scores with a running forearm, followed by a pair of German suplexes for a pair of two’s.

That’s it for the offense though HHH goes out of the comfort zone with a tiger suplex (what an odd thing to type) to cut Bryan off again. The one suplex worked so well for HHH that he tries the super version, only to get reversed into a sunset bomb. It’s time for the running dropkicks in the corner but a heck of a clothesline turns Bryan inside out (Stephanie: “YEAH!!! WOO!!!”).

This time it’s Bryan popping up with the kick to the head but the Swan Dive hits a raised knee. Why that doesn’t hurt HHH’s knee isn’t clear. Granted he’s too busy going back to the Crossface to care. The grip starts to slip away as Bryan crawls over to the ropes (it’s barely on his forehead) but HHH rolls it back to the middle. Bryan finally switches it over into the YES Lock but a rope is reached. It’s time to get fired up with back to back suicide dives and YES Kicks against the barricade, followed by the missile dropkick back inside.

The shoulder being banged up doesn’t seem to bother Bryan as he nips up for more kicks to the chest. The running knee is countered into a spinebuster though and the Pedigree….gets two, sending the fans right back into their frenzy. JBL and Stephanie are both stunned and a small package for two on HHH makes things even worse. Some more Pedigree attempts are countered so HHH knees him in the head. A third attempt is countered so HHH tries a belly to back suplex. Bryan flips out, lands on his feet, and hits the running knee to go to the main event at 25:55.

Rating: A. Excellent performance and storytelling from both here as Bryan survives everything HHH has to throw at him and wins in the end through pure determination. This was all about HHH being confident that he was the better man coming in and getting frustrated that he couldn’t stop Bryan. You could see the desperation coming in when the Pedigree only got two and there was nothing else he could throw at Bryan.

Also, Stephanie added a lot here with the constant screaming, to the point where you were begging to see her lose. What made it work though was she DID lose and got shown up, a rarity for her. Outstanding stuff here though with everyone doing their thing as well as they could have in a classic match.

Post match Stephanie slaps Bryan for a distraction, allowing HHH to wrap the arm around the post and crush it with a chair. Again: HHH lost his control and is acting like the old savage instead of the corporate boss that he’s become. That’s a nice touch.

New Age Outlaws/Kane vs. Shield

Kane and the Shield both work for the Authority but they’ve been having issues as of late. A few weeks back, Kane sent out the Outlaws and a few other teams to beat Shield down, seemingly going rogue on HHH in the process. Shield comes through the crowd with those thankfully short-lived half masks until Kane INSANELY LOUD pyro interrupts.

Kane and Ambrose slug it out to start with Dean getting the better of it. Reigns comes in to no reaction (oh, it’ll come) and cleans house with the jumping clotheslines and a Samoan drop. The double apron kick hits both Outlaws and everything breaks down in a hurry. Ambrose breaks up a Fameasser attempt on Reigns and there’s a Superman Punch to Gunn.

That leaves Billy all alone so the Outlaws bail, earning a double suicide dive from Rollins and Ambrose. The spear drops Kane and a double spear puts the Outlaws down. It’s a double TripleBomb to the Outlaws (JBL: “There goes the Attitude Era.”) for the double pin at 2:55. Total and complete squash as the Shield has basically turned face already.

Jim Duggan and Sgt. Slaughter are playing with action figures, with DANNY DAVIS refereeing. Ricky Steamboat comes in to challenge….but that’s not happening because Ted DiBiase has bought the toys. I chuckled, though I wonder why Duggan isn’t wearing a shirt. Ron Simmons, cameo, swearing, you get the joke.

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Big Show, Sheamus, Dolph Ziggler, The Great Khali, Zack Ryder, Drew McIntyre, Heath Slater, Mark Henry, Titus O’Neil, Santino Marella, Brad Maddox, Darren Young, Justin Gabriel, Yoshi Tatsu, David Otunga, Big E, Fandango, The Miz, Jinder Mahal, Rey Mysterio, Tyson Kidd, Goldust, Cody Rhodes, Kofi Kingston, Brodus Clay, Alberto Del Rio, Sheamus, Sin Cara, Xavier Woods, Cesaro, R-Truth

Only Sheamus and Big Show get entrances. One thing WWE is VERY good at is sneaking the people to the ring when something (the legends segment) is on the screen distracting you. I was surprised when the lights came back on and the ring was filled up. Yoshi is out first as there are way too many people in there at once to keep track of much. Cody and Kofi are sent over the top but hang in, resulting in a battle of kicks to the ribs as they hang over the apron. Cool visual if nothing else and they both get back in.

There goes Maddox (still Raw GM at this point) and Khali’s chop gets rid of Clay. Khali is dumped out by a posse and McIntyre gorilla presses Ryder out. 3MB tosses Young but Henry tosses all three of them (including future WWE Champion Jinder Mahal). Show eliminates Henry as the ring is getting a lot less full in a hurry. Sheamus dumps Titus and Santino loads up the Cobra because that’s his one joke and he’s going to use it every chance he can.

The Cobra gets rid of Miz (erg) but Alberto throws Santino out in a replay of the 2011 Rumble. There goes Sandow as you can at least see the mat again. Woods was put out off camera and Big E. powerbombs Gabriel out in a big crash. Otunga is out next as even Lawler is acknowledging the rapid eliminations. Fandango kicks out Big E. (Intercontinental Champion in a miserable reign) and the Fandangoing begins. Unfortunately he spends WAY too much time on the apron, allowing Sheamus to hit about 30 forearms to the chest for an elimination.

Truth gets tossed as well and Show mocks the dancing for an unfunny moment. For some reason Rey goes after Show, greatly pleasing JBL who wants Show to eat him. With Sin Cara eliminated off camera, Kidd is tossed as well and Del Rio enziguris Goldust out. We’re down to Cody, Alberto, Kofi, Ziggler, Sheamus, Big Show, Cesaro and Mysterio. Before I can finish tying that list, Cody gets tossed to get us down to seven. The 619 hits Alberto but Cesaro blocks a second attempt and uppercuts Rey out. JBL: “Good.”

Cesaro LAUNCHES Kofi over the top…but his feet land on the steps for his annual save. I’ve always liked that one. Kofi comes back in for his run of Troubles in Paradise until Cesaro pulls him out of the air for the Swing. Cesaro is so dizzy that he walks into a chokeslam but a Brogue Kick drops Show. A second eliminates Kofi and now it’s Ziggler’s turn to get our hopes up. Thankfully Del Rio superkicks him out, much to the crowd’s annoyance. Give it a few more years and see how much you care.

Ever the nitwit, Del Rio puts Sheamus in the cross armbreaker but Sheamus powers him up, only to tumble over the top for a double elimination. We’re down to Cesaro vs. Big Show and you know who the fans are behind here. Some uppercuts and clotheslines rock Show but he throws Cesaro to the apron. A chop knocks Cesaro out of the air but he PICKS SHOW UP (ala Hogan slamming Andre) and throws him over the top to win at 13:24.

Rating: D+. Nothing special for a battle royal but that’s to be expected with so many people in there at once. Like I said earlier though, there is no excuse for this not to have launched Cesaro to the moon. The fans wanted to see it happen, he has the skills and they gave him a great moment to set it up. Now how could that possibly fail? Putting him with Heyman really was a death sentence as it brings this expectation and there’s no way around it, which ultimately sank him. Great moment here though and that’s at least hope for the future.

Show shakes Cesaro’s hand and leaves. It takes five referees to bring the trophy into the ring so Cesaro lifts it up by himself.

We recap John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt. Bray hadn’t even been around for a year at this point and it’s his first major match after several months of midcarding it. I’m still not sure what the idea here is, but Wyatt started talking about wanting to destroy Cena’s legacy. I think it was supposed to be giving in to Cena’s inner anger or turning to the dark side, but it wound up with Cena being scared of the Wyatts and saying he’d fight anyway. They were really bad about making the intent clear, which could be said about a lot of Wyatt matches.

Bray Wyatt vs. John Cena

Wyatt is played to the ring with a bunch of (I think) voodoo dancers and fire around him for a CREEPY visual. Harper and Rowan are here too with Rowan dragging the rocking chair. What a way to debut at Wrestlemania. Cena’s big entrance? Running to the ring. Wyatt drops to his knees and offers Cena a free shot, allowing Cena to “be the monster”. Cena tells him to get up before grabbing a headlock takeover.

That goes nowhere so an uppercut puts Cena down instead. Some maniacal laughter ensues and Wyatt says Cena doesn’t want to fight him. Bray runs him over with a body block but Cena is right back with the clothesline as he goes into a bit of a frenzy. That makes Bray smile and laugh again so Cena chokes in the corner as you can see the anger on his face. A running big boot (Huh?) drops Wyatt again but he’s right back with the suplex slam (always looks painful).

The fans serenade the two of them with He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands and we hit the sleeper/chinlock to keep Cena down. You don’t chinlock Cena though as he comes back with the ProtoBomb but Bray spiders up to block the Shuffle. That’s still one of the coolest signature spots of its day. A release Rock Bottom gives Bray two and he conducts the fans as the singing begins again. Cena manages to get up top but gets powerbombed out of the air for a sick impact.

A spinning gutbuster gives Bray two and a DDT onto the apron knocks Cena even sillier (take a shot for the announcers reminding us that it’s the hardest part of the ring). The fans sing again, this time with their arms waving and Bray is smart enough to acknowledge them. Cena powers out of a superplex but dives onto Harper and Rowan, despite them barely being a factor so far.

Wyatt sends him into the steps, and says he knows what to do now. Apparently that would be take too much time picking up the steps and getting posted as a result. Cena can’t bring himself to use the steps and gets body blocked for two instead. We pause for more singing and the backsplash misses as a result, meaning the first AA connects for two. Harper and Rowan finally get involved as Rowan offers a distraction so Harper can hit a superkick. Cena rolls outside and drives Harper though the barricade. At least he was justified for once.

Back in and Sister Abigail’s Kiss (kissing didn’t really fit Bray) is countered into the STF but Bray is in the ropes. Sister Abigail’s Kiss gets two and Bray backs into the corner in shock for a good reaction. It’s chair time so Rowan comes in for the distraction but Bray throws the chair to Cena instead. He offers him another free shot to end him but Cena hits Rowan instead. I’m not exactly sure if that makes things better. Not that it matters as Cena reverses Sister Abigail into the AA for the pin at 22:27.

Rating: C. And that’s it for Bray Wyatt being a big deal. For the life of me, I have no idea why Cena needed to win this match and I’m never going to get that. Wyatt didn’t have the big win yet and he had clearly gotten into Cena’s head but then Cena just pins him clean. How does this help anyone? Cena doesn’t need an upper midcard win and Wyatt has his legs cut out from underneath him. Horrible, terrible decision here and the match wasn’t even great in the first place.

Recap of the Hall of Fame ceremony. Undertaker coming out during Paul Bearer’s induction was great.

And now for the class presentation:

Jake Roberts (not much of a reaction)

Mr. T. (that mother….)

Paul Bearer (his son does such a perfect impression)

Carlos Colon (next to no reaction)

Lita (ROAR)

Razor Ramon (another roar)

Ultimate Warrior (The camera guy pulled WAY back in case he ran to the ring. This is so hard to watch now, knowing what was coming just two days later.)

That’s a heck of a class actually.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker. I think you get the idea here: no man can beat the Streak but a Beast might be able to pull it off. During the build, Undertaker stabbed Brock in the hand to show that he was more aggressive, which is rarely a good idea in wrestling. Heyman got in a great line here by saying Brock is the 1 in 21-1. The end of the video is equally awesome with Heyman saying “Eat, sleep, conquer, repeat, eat, sleep, conquer, repeat, eat sleep, conquer….the Streak.” Finally, the lyrics playing over this: “In times all things shall pass away.” They weren’t exactly hiding things.

Brock Lesnar vs. Undertaker

Brock looks downright terrifying here, being as chiseled as I can remember seeing him and giving that stare that guarantees death that only he can pull off. Undertaker’s entrance features a line of caskets with each Streak victim’s name on top. They all light on fire because that’s the kind of thing Undertaker does.

Undertaker hammers away to start but the first suplex takes him down twenty seconds in. That seems to wake him up and a necksnap across the top rope staggers Brock. Back in and Undertaker wraps the arm around the ropes before sending it into the post. It’s weird to see Undertaker this aggressive to start. Old School is broken up with right hands as Cole goes over the history of the Streak. Lesnar misses a charge and posts himself so Undertaker kicks him in the bad arm. There’s the apron legdrop as Brock is in trouble for the first few minutes.

Back in and the chokeslam and F5 are both escaped with Undertaker sending the shoulder into the buckle. A running big boot misses though and Brock sends the leg into the post. Undertaker tries a kick but gets shoved down onto the floor, which may be where he suffers a severe concussion. You can see his eyes looking very messed up and he’s not moving nearly as well all of a sudden. Back in and Brock chokes in the corner and OH YEAH Undertaker is gone. That glossy look on his face is scary stuff and Lesnar stomps away at the leg.

Undertaker gets in an elbow to the jaw but Brock easily shoves him down again. You can see Brock trying to figure out what he can do right now because Undertaker has nothing to give him. Heyman offers a near creepy laugh as Brock forearms Undertaker down again and again. I know it’s not the most thrilling thing in the world but this is about all they can do safely in Undertaker’s condition.

A running DDT puts Lesnar down for a few seconds and Snake Eyes into the big boot (or high boot according to Cole) drop him again. The chokeslam gets two and an F5 gets the same with the latter shocking Brock. A quick Hell’s Gate has Brock in trouble but he muscles Undertaker up for the powerbomb break. Undertaker slaps it on a second time (Heyman: “POWER YOUR WAY OUT! YOU’RE BROCK LESNAR”) and it’s a second powerbomb for another escape.

The Kimura goes on but Undertaker actually reverses into one of his own. Brock VERY carefully takes him down (it’s clear Brock knows Undertaker’s head is hurt) and drives some slow motion shoulders to the ribs. Undertaker stops a charge with a raised boot but Old School is countered into a second F5 for two more, sending Heyman into a fit.

Some German suplexes rock Undertaker but Brock can’t follow up. At least we get an awesome speech from Heyman, saying Undertaker is taking Brock’s legacy away from him. Hey now that’s Cena’s deal (whatever it means). For some reason Brock hammers away in the corner and even stands on the ropes while Undertaker is almost seated in the corner. That means the Last Ride but Undertaker can’t follow up.

The worst Tombstone in recorded history gets two (you could see a good eight inches between Lesnar’s head and the mat) and Undertaker is stunned. He’s fine enough to sit up and try another Tombstone, only to be reversed into the third F5 to end the Streak at 25:11. Heyman makes the segment by going from the cocky grin at two to shock and awe at the pin. And no, this wasn’t changed on the fly and Brock didn’t shoot on Undertaker or whatever other nonsense conspiracy theories you’ll see out there. It was the planned finish and Undertaker got hurt during the match. Nothing more.

Rating: D. We’ll get to the important part here in a minute. This is a match where you have to excuse the performance because of Undertaker’s injury. It’s very clear that he was banged up early on in the match and you can see everything chance in a heartbeat. With the concussion, Lesnar wasn’t able to do much to him and Undertaker was only able to do so much on his own. It’s a bad match, but not because of the two people involved. Disappointing, but understandable given the circumstances.

Now for the 800lb gorilla in the room. There are two schools of thought to the Streak and you could go with either of them. There’s the thought that it never should have ended and could have gone on as the one thing that never happens in WWE. I can live with that. At the same time though, there’s the mentality of it has to end sometime and how can you buy that Undertaker, who hadn’t wrestled in a year, could come back and beat Lesnar in one on one match? I can see that line of thinking as well.

However, if you’re going to break the Streak, it should have been on someone with a lot to gain. Sure Lesnar went on to beat Cena for the title in a very memorable match, but there were others who needed the win WAY more (like Bray Wyatt for example). Lesnar does look like an even bigger deal, but Lesnar already was a big deal. What’s the point in giving him something like this if it doesn’t make that much of a difference?

As for the reaction though….I’ve never seen anything like it. It was like Santa Claus was shot in front of all the children in the world on Christmas Eve. The air was let out of the stadium and there was nothing that could be done. This wasn’t something that happened in wrestling and fans didn’t know how to take it. I saw fans crying and running out of their seats while others begged Hogan to come out here and do something about it. But no, the Streak was over, and there was nothing that could be done. That’s how it went down and really, I think I can live with it.

Should he have kept wrestling? Again, I could see it going either way. On the one hand, he had some good matches after this and I can understand why he wouldn’t want to go out this way. That being said, without the Streak, so much of what Undertaker was is gone. It’s a huge part to take away from him and I’m not sure how much of a point there is to continuing at Wrestlemania with the Streak being broken. It’s a hard question, but I could see why he didn’t want to go out, either this way or at all.

The fans are all stunned (complete with the infamous bug eyed guy in the front row) and it takes a few moments for the official announcement. You’ll hear this compared to Bruno losing the title and really, it’s hard to argue this being on the same level. The 21-1 sign comes on the screen as Lesnar and Heyman leave and the announcers act like they’ve seen a murder.

Undertaker looks up the ramp to see that they’re gone before sitting up as the standing ovation begins. He falls back down again though and closes his eyes on the mat for a bit. There’s another situp and the THANK YOU TAKER chants begin. He gets to his feet (Fan: “YOU SUCK!”) and looks around a bit before going back to one knee and shaking his head. The announcers give him a standing ovation as well until Undertaker slowly walks up the ramp. He leaves the stadium….and collapsed backstage as the concussion really was that bad.

Wrestlemania XXXI is in the Silicon Valley.

Divas Title: Vickie Guerrero Divas Championship Invitational

AJ Lee, Brie Bella, Nikki Bella, Aksana, Alicia Fox, Tamina Snuka, Summer Rae, Cameron, Eva Marie, Emma, Layla, Naomi, Natalya, Rosa Mendes

AJ is defending and this is one fall to a finish with only the champ getting an entrance. Vickie, who hates AJ for reasons not important enough to explain, screeches good luck to everyone and we’re ready to go, with everyone in the ring at once. AJ and bodyguard Tamina are shoved into the middle so everyone can beat on her. It’s a big brawl (well duh) and I’m not going to bother trying to keep up with the play by play here.

The Bellas hit a horrible double gutbuster for two on Layla and Natalya stacks up Cameron, Rosa and Fox at the same time. The triple Sharpshooter doesn’t work (partially due to the laws of physics) and it’s a four way cover for a four way near fall. Cameron hits a Codebreaker and snaps her top, which is made worse when Emma puts on the Emma Lock. It’s time for the parade of secondary finishers as they’re trying to get any kind of a reaction here. Brie dropkicks Tamina to the floor and the Bellas hit stereo suicide dives onto the pile (marking the ONLY time I’ve ever thought the Bellas looked cool).

Back in and the twins shove each other, thankfully without wishing the other died in the womb. The Rack Attack gets two on Brie but Alicia comes back in with a good looking tilt-a-whirl backbreaker on Nikki. Naomi breaks up the Superfly Splash and we hit the required Tower of Doom spot. AJ grabs the Black Widow on Naomi to retain at 6:50.

Rating: D-. Oh come on how was this going to be anything but a failure? The women’s division was nothing at this point save for AJ and Paige, who would debut the next night (which I called to perfection at least two weeks early). Other than that though, it was a bunch of models trying to be wrestlers and bad action throughout the division. This was a mess, but what were you expecting with fourteen people in there at once?

Mean Gene Okerlund talks to Hulk Hogan (yeah he’s still a thing on here) when Roddy Piper and Paul Orndorff come in. Piper COMPLIMENTS Hogan on how good a job he’s doing tonight and says he’s finally over the loss at Wrestlemania I. It eats Orndorff up though, because every day someone tells him about it. How does that make him feel? Gene: “Horrible!” Violence is teased and here’s Mr. T. to even the odds. Pat Patterson, in a referee shirt for the sake of continuity, comes in to say it was thirty years ago. The four of them actually bury the hatchet, though Piper nearly retches as he shake’s Mr. T.’s hand.

Bruno Sammartino, Harley Race, Bob Backlund, Dusty Rhodes and Bret Hart (easily the biggest reaction) are in the front row.

No recap for the main event so we’ll improvise. Orton is the Authority’s hand picked face of the company and was handed the World Title by HHH. Batista won the Royal Rumble to get here. Bryan is in due to winning earlier (in case you decided to skip the opener for some odd reason).

WWE World Title: Randy Orton vs. Batista vs. Daniel Bryan

Orton is defending and is played to the ring by Rev Theory. Bryan still has a horrible arm coming in. Batista tries a Batista Bomb but Bryan hurricanranas him outside in short order. A crank to the arm brings Bryan down though and it’s Batista coming back in for some shoulders to Orton’s ribs. All three head outside with Orton going back first into the apron. It’s already time to go to the announcers’ table but first, Bryan gets knocked down again.

Orton suplexes Batista onto the barricade but it’s Bryan back up with YES Kicks to both of them. The big kick takes out Batista, only to have Orton suplex Bryan onto the bad shoulder for two. Somehow Bryan comes back with the running corner dropkicks to both guys, followed by a top rope hurricanrana to Orton. The fans are back to life, only to have Orton send Bryan outside.

A superplex drops Batista but Bryan is right there with the Swan Dive. Bryan grabs the YES Lock on Orton but here are HHH and Stephanie for the save. The referee gets taken out as well so here’s crooked referee Scott Armstrong to take over. The Batista Bomb gets two on Bryan but a spear only hits post. Bryan has finally had enough of this and kicks Armstrong in the head, followed by a suicide dive to take out Stephanie and HHH.

That’s enough for HHH who grabs the sledgehammer, only to have Bryan take it away and blast him instead. A livid Orton is back in though and sends Bryan into the barricade as Batista comes over to help with the stomping. The tape is pulled off of Bryan’s arm and Orton drills it with the steps.

They load up two announcers’ tables and, after hitting Bryan in the head with a monitor (and some CM PUNK chants, back when they might actually mean something), it’s a Batista Bomb into an RKO (jumping reverse neckbreaker in this case) with Orton’s back landing square on a monitor. I was terrified that he had a major injury but thankfully he gets up pretty quickly. Medics come down to check on Bryan as Lawler makes a good point: why isn’t Batista throwing one of them in the ring and PINNING THEM?

Instead Batista sends Orton into various non-ring things before taking him back inside….for a backdrop to the floor. The hanging DDT off the apron plants Batista as Bryan is being wheeled out. Not so fast though as he fights his way off the stretcher, only to be sent into the steps by Orton. The RKO is countered into a YES Lock but Batista is there fore another save. That just earns Batista a YES Lock of his own with Orton making the save this time. A spear cuts Bryan down and the RKO gets two on Batista in a great false finish.

Orton loads up the Punt but Bryan cuts him off with the running knee. Batista throws Bryan outside and gets two on Orton. There’s the Batista Bomb to Orton but Bryan comes back in with the running knee to Batista. The YES Lock goes on and Batista taps (that’s important because Bryan had showed he could beat Orton before) to FINALLY make Bryan champion at 23:21. Cole: “A MIRACLE ON BOURBON STREET!” I mean, the Superdome isn’t on Bourbon Street but that’s an awesome call.

Rating: B. The wrestling wasn’t the point here (duh) but what was important was nailing the ending, which is exactly what they did here. This match made Bryan look like the giant killer and that’s exactly the point of what was going on here. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions as Bryan fought through everything and won the title that was rightfully his to begin with. It may not be a classic, but the ending was all you could ask for and more.

Bryan celebrates for a LONG time, including the iconic shot with both belts on the announcers’ table, as confetti (of which I have a piece) falls to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. There are some weak spots in there (Undertaker vs. Lesnar stands out like Undertaker’s sore head) but the stuff they nailed, they REALLY nailed. Above all else this is the Daniel Bryan show and with a classic to start and the perfect ending, it’s hard to complain about much. This show felt like it was a spectacle and that’s where WWE shines. Yeah there were some weaker matches, but there was also a twenty five minute segment with Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin and the Rock acting like the biggest stars of all time. I had the time of my life watching this show live and it more than holds up. Outstanding stuff.

Ratings Comparison

Usos vs. Los Matadores vs. Ryback/Curtis Axel vs. Real Americans

Original: B

2015 Redo: B

2018 Redo: B+

Daniel Bryan vs. HHH

Original: A

2015 Redo: A

2018 Redo: A

Shield vs. New Age Outlaws/Kane

Original: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

2018 Redo: N/A

Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal

Original: C+

2015 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: D+

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt

Original: B

2015 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: C+

2015 Redo: C+

2018 Redo: D

Vickie Guerrero Divas Championship Invitational

Original: D+

2015 Redo: D

2018 Redo: D-

Daniel Bryan vs. Randy Orton vs. Batista

Original: A-

2015 Redo: B

2018 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2015 Redo: A-

2018 Redo: A-

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/04/07/wrestlemania-xxx-oh-yeah-i-went-there/

And the 2015 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/03/28/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxx-2015-redo-yes/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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