Wrestlemania Count-Up – XX (2022 Redo): Cut That Stuff Out

Wrestlemania XX
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole

It’s the second of three redos this year and it is a show that I have seen quite a few times over the years. WWE knows how to bust out the big anniversary shows and that is what we will be seeing here. The fact that the show is in Madison Square Garden makes it even better. The main event is HHH defending the Raw World Title against Chris Benoit and Shawn Michaels in a match that I think might work. Let’s get to it.

The Harlem Boys Choir sing America the Beautiful with a VERY patriotic montage.

The opening video features Vince McMahon walking out of the shadows and talking about how he had a vision twenty years ago which shaped everything today. This gives us the always awesome montage of Wrestlemania clips, which really is their strong suit. They know how to make things feel special and that is what they did here. Speaking of special, the video ends with Shane McMahon now next to Vince and presenting his son, Vince’s first grandchild, as the narrator talks about where it all begins again. That has always stuck with me since I saw this show for the first time and it is great.

In a change from the usual MSG setup, the entrance is on the left instead of opposite the hard camera, though there is a large screen showing the current match.

We get the traditional welcome from the multiple commentary teams.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Cena is challenging and is on fire here, while Big Show has defended the title less than three times since winning it back in October. Cena’s rap mocks Show’s anatomy in various ways and promises that he’ll win the title tonight. Show shoves him away to start but Cena is back with the right hands. Cena’s shots are shrugged off though and he gets sent outside, setting up a powerslam for two back inside.

The fans think Show sucks as he slowly hammers Cena down, including a slam. We get the required standing on Cena’s chest/throat and a suplex drops Cena again. More standing, this time on Cena’s back, seems to wake him up a bit but Show kicks him in the face. Show’s standing legdrop gets two and the frustration starts setting in fast. Powered by the fans (his kind always is), Cena slips out of a slam and grabs a choke, which earns him a hard clotheslines.

Show is back with the cobra clutch but Cena powers out again and avoids a charge in the corner. The FU barely gets two though and now it’s Cena being stunned. With nothing else working, Cena grabs his chain, which is taken away by the competent referee. Instead it’s the brass knuckles off Show’s head, setting up the FU to give the filthy cheater the pin and the title at 9:20.

Rating: C. This was more of a coronation than anything else and it came at the end of a not very interesting match. The problem with someone like Show is there are only so many things that you can do with him. Cena has the power to make it work a little better, but this isn’t the best time in Show’s history and it was obvious here. That being said, this was ALL about Cena and as long as he left with the title, nothing else mattered.

Coach is walking through the back and after meeting various people like Tom Prichard and Teddy Long, he goes in to see Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff (with assistant Johnny Nitro), who wants to make sure that Undertaker is here. Bischoff sends Coach to find him but Coach isn’t exactly comfortable with that. He goes anyway, as Bischoff doesn’t really care.

Evolution, minus HHH, is in a stairwell, with Randy Orton talking about how it’s ironic that we are back here in MSG where he became the new Hardcore Legend. We see a clip of Orton kicking Mick Foley down these steps, which made Foley walk away back in December. Then Foley came back, when Orton spat in his face. Foley can’t accept that life has passed him by, just like evolution.

We see clips of Foley being beaten up over and over, including a segment where Foley told Orton to really hit him in the face. Evolution has gotten bored with it, just like Foley, so he called Hollywood to get the Rock. Then Evolution beat him down too and they’ll do it again tonight. It all started here in MSG, and tonight it all ends here as well. This one always stuck out for me too, just because of the different location.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Booker T. vs. Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance vs. Mark Jindrak/Garrison Cade

Van Dam and Booker are defending (with their pretty terrible mashup theme) and this is one fall to a finish. Dupree and Van Dam start things off with a monkey flip sending Dupree flying. Booker beats up La Resistance but it’s off to Bubba for the hard lockup. A neckbreaker drops Booker for two and the snap jabs put him down again. D-Von comes in so Van Dam takes him down with a top rope kick to the face, showing that he too is a filthy cheater by coming in without a tag.

Jindrak tags himself in to stomp away on Booker and it’s Dupree coming back in to drive Booker into the corner. Conway cranks on both arms with a knee in Booker’s back for far too long until a spinebuster breaks things up. The hot tag brings in Van Dam to clean house but D-Von shoves him off the top to break up the Five Star. Everything breaks down and Cade saves Booker from the 3D. Booker kicks Conway down and the Five Star retains the titles at 7:54.

Rating: C-. This is one of the most “yeah whatever” matches I can remember in a long time. There were too many people involved and it was only so good because of all of the people running around. Also, why are you using a minute of an eight minute match on a rest hold? You have eight people involved but we spent that long on Conway pulling Booker’s arms? Really?

Coach goes to find Undertaker and is told there are some “freakish noises” coming from a door. He heads to the door, which is being knocked back and forth. Gene Okerlund, pulling his clothes come back on, comes out, followed by Bobby Heenan, whose shirt is undone. Coach wonders what is going on, but Heenan says they were playing poker. Heenan: “He was dealing.” Coach wants to know what was going on in there, so here are Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young, who grab Gene and Heenan and drag them back in. Heenan: “No I don’t want to go back! I haven’t been well!” This still gets me every time.

We recap Christian vs. Chris Jericho. They used to be best friends and made a bet about who could be more, ahem, successful with Lita and Trish Stratus respectively. Lita kind of went away, but Jericho started to fall for Trish. She found out about the bet and yelled at Jericho, who then tried to win her back. Christian turned on Jericho to get him to be the old Jericho again, setting up the match. This was a really detailed story and I’ve always liked it for telling a coherent story throughout. You don’t get that often and it was one of the best of the era.

Chris Jericho vs. Christian

They fight over a lockup to start and go into the corner, with Christian shoving him instead of giving a clean break. Jericho punches him in the face and starts throwing knees to take over, setting up the running elbow. A kick to the face and a backdrop to the floor keep Christian in trouble and Jericho hits a bit dive to take him down again. Back in and Christian manages to belly to back suplex him to the floor to take over for the first time.

The neck crank goes on back inside, followed by a chinlock with a knee in Jericho’s back. A spinwheel kick gives Christian two and it’s time to slap Jericho in the face a few times. That earns him a head to head collision though and they’re both down. The slugout goes to Jericho and he hits the running crotch attack to the back in the ropes. The step up enziguri gives Jericho two but Christian reverses a rollup into one of his own, with a grab of the rope getting two.

Jericho’s bulldog sets up the Lionsault to Christian’s raised knees and a reverse tornado DDT gives Christian two of his own. Jericho is right back up with his swinging sleeper drop but he gets tossed off the top, banging up his knee in the process. Christian’s high crossbody is rolled through so he kicks Jericho in the knee. The Texas Cloverleaf goes on for a bit until Jericho reverses into the Walls.

Christian is in the ropes almost immediately and he rolls outside….with Jericho holding on and keeping the Walls on outside. Back in and a butterfly superplex gives Jericho two and here is Trish Stratus to slap the apron. An implant DDT gives Christian two, which draws Trish up to the apron. Christian shoves her down so Jericho sends him outside. Trish elbows Jericho in the face (it’s unclear if she could see who it was) and Christian’s rollup with tights is enough for the pin at 14:44.

Rating: B. This got going once it became a regular match and these two have more than enough talent to make a longer match work. Christian certainly needed the win more than Jericho here, as it was a big boost in probably his biggest singles win ever. Jericho winning here ends the feud so having Christian move up is the right way to go. Good match too, and that really shouldn’t be surprising.

Post match Trish is upset and apologizes to Jericho. Christian comes back but Trish turns on Jericho and slaps him on the face, setting up the Unprettier. Evil Trish leaves with Christian and we get the semi-famous kiss on the stage in the next big step for both of them.

Mick Foley is fired up to be back in Madison Square Garden and needs to get in that mindset to put all of this anger and emotion on Evolution. The Rock interrupts and is VERY fired up, saying he has finally come back…..home. After telling Lilian Garcia not to look at the People’s package (which she does), Rock steals the cameraman to come with him and sees Hurricane and Rosey, Jimmy Snuka and Don Muraco and then goes all the way into the arena for a shot of the crowd. They’re ready for Evolution and it’s weird seeing Rock and Foley as these two big serious guys going up against evil.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

No recap video here, but it’s basically Foley fighting Randy Orton and the two of them both have major backup. Rock and Foley clear the ring to start before Rock and Flair settle things down, giving the New York fans a crazy dream match. A shoulder puts Flair down and Rock busts out a strut, with Flair coming back up for a WOO. The chops don’t do Flair any good and Rock hits a backdrop to send him rolling outside.

Foley follows him out and drops Flair with a clothesline before coming in himself. That sends Orton bailing to the floor so Foley is right there to send him into the announcers’ table. Back in and Rock takes over on Orton (there’s a dream match we never got), but has to punch Flair and Batista off the apron. The distraction is enough for Batista to come in and take over, allowing Flair to hit some more effective chops. We get the big strut and Flair goes up top and….oh you know the deal.

Batista comes back in before Rock can bring in Foley but the tag brings in Foley a few seconds later anyway. Foley fights out of the corner and hammers Batista down but that huge Batista clothesline cuts his down. Some double teaming on the floor has Foley in more trouble and there’s the big whip to send him knees first into the steps (taking that bump so many times explains so much about why Foley walks that way).

Back in and Foley and Flair slug it out until Orton can come in and pull at Foley’s hair for a reverse chinlock. Batista adds some clotheslines but Foley slips in a quick Mandible Claw. In a smarter move than you would expect from a musclehead like this version of Batista, he waves Orton in for the save instead of getting in more trouble. Flair comes back in and gets forearmed in the face, allowing the really easy tag back to Rock. House is cleaned but Batista cuts him off with a spinebuster.

That lets Flair….load up the People’s Elbow (complete with throwing an invisible elbow pad), but again he takes too long, allowing Rock to nip up and really clean house. The spinebuster plants Flair, setting up a People’s Elbow, complete with strut, for a delayed two. There’s the Rock Bottom to Orton with Flair making the save.

Flair grabs a chair but the distraction lets the Batista Bomb hit Rock to give Orton two (in the same way Batista helped Orton beat Shawn Michaels at Survivor Series 2003). The real hot tag brings in Foley to clean house but the Mandible Claw takes too long (theme of the match) and Orton grabs an RKO for the pin at 17:55.

Rating: B+. The more I see this match, the more I like it, as you have Rock and Flair doing everything they could to steal the show and Foley going after Orton every chance he could. Batista was in there with the muscle and it made for a great showcase. It was every bit the big moment that they were shooting for and it made me want to see a bunch of these combinations again. That wouldn’t happen for the most part, but dang they made this one work really well, as the match itself was a backdrop to just doing entertaining stuff, leaving the crowd completely in their hands.

Hall of Fame video recap, featuring Heenan’s “I wish Monsoon was here”, which will get me every single time.

The Hall of Fame class is introduced by Gene Okerlund:

Bobby Heenan (still playing to the crowd as only he can)
Tito Santana (about as perfect of a midcarder as you could have)
Big John Studd (represented by his son)
Harley Race (yep, though billing him as The King is a bit odd)
Pete Rose (booed, but apparently very grateful for the honor so points for that)
Don Muraco (I could go for more of him, as you don’t see him brought up very often)
Greg Valentine (who looks like he is ready for Wrestlemania IV)
Junkyard Dog (represented by his daughter)
Billy Graham (there’s an influential one)
Sgt. Slaughter (with the salutes)
Jesse Ventura (I could listen to that voice talk about anything, as long as he jabs McMahon)

This was the first class in almost ten years and it is a heck of a group, though no one really stands out as a headliner.

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

Playboy Evening Gown match, as Jackie and Stacy are jealous of the other two for being in the magazine. Hold on though as Sable wants to start minus the evening gowns. That’s exactly what we do, with commentary reacting exactly as you would expect them to. Jackie won’t drop her gown so it gets ripped off of her to start fast. Sable kicks at Jackie’s ribs in the corner and Torrie comes in with a high crossbody.

Stacy comes in (taking her time to come over the ropes) and throws in a cartwheel. The Kevin Nash choke in the corner doesn’t do Stacy much good so they go to the pinfall reversal sequence for various camera shots. Stacy’s kick to the face gets two on Torrie before it’s back to Jackie. The referee gets rolled over and it’s Torrie reversing a rollup for the pin on Jackie at 2:32. This is exactly what you would have expected it to be.

Fans have come from various states and countries for the show.

WWE Champion Eddie Guerrero says he has Chris Benoit’s back win or lose, but Benoit doesn’t like the word lose. Eddie says no one believes in him but Benoit says he believes in himself and tonight is his night. That’s what Eddie wanted to hear.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

Chavo Guerrero Jr. (with his dad) is defending and will enter last in the ten person gauntlet. Everyone gets their entrance (with Ultimo Dragon’s two slips edited out, thankfully) and it’s Shannon Moore in at #1 and Ultimo Dragon in at #2. Dragon works on the arm to start but Moore shoulders him down for….well not much really. Back up and Moore misses a Whisper in the Wind, allowing Dragon to hit his standing Sliced Bread for the elimination at 1:19.

Jamie Noble is in at #3 to jump Dragon from behind with a clothesline for two. Dragon is right back with his alternating kicks for two but he has to bail out of a moonsault. A neckbreaker drops Dragon and a guillotine choke finishes him off at 2:17 (total). Funaki is in at #4 and hits a high crossbody but Noble rolls through for the pin at 2:27.

Nunzio is in at #5 as commentary brings up SD Jones getting pinned in nine seconds at Wrestlemania. Some quick rollups give Nunzio two but Noble sends him outside for the HUGE flip dive off the top. They take turns pulling each other off the apron until Noble gets the countout elimination at 4:20.

Billy Kidman is in at #6 to jump Noble from behind (again with the filthy cheaters) and Nunzio pulls Noble to the floor. Instead of standing around, Kidman hits a crazy top rope shooting star onto the two of them for the almost terrifying landing. Thankfully Kidman is able to throw Noble back inside for two but has to fight out of the guillotine. An enziguri sets up the shooting star press, but Kidman has to fight Noble off. That’s fine enough, as the super BK Bomb gets rid of Noble at 6:12.

Rey Mysterio (as the Flash) is in at #7 and the top rope seated senton connects, only to have Kidman blast him with a dropkick. Mysterio hits his own dropkick to send Kidman outside but Akio snaps Rey’s throat across the top. Kidman’s spinebuster gets two so he puts Rey on top, only to get pulled down with a sunset bomb for the elimination at 7:30.

It’s Tajiri in at #8 to kick away at Mysterio and the Tarantula makes it worse. That doesn’t last long (just shy of five seconds oddly enough) and it’s the 619 to rock Tajiri. The springboard….something misses though and Tajiri loads up the mist, which hits an interfering Akio by mistake.

Rey grabs a rollup to get rid of Tajiri at 8:39 and apparently the mist means Akio can’t go, so Chavo is in at #10 to complete the field. Tajiri cheap shots Rey so Chavo gets two but Rey fights up and takes Chavo Sr. down. The running flip dive takes out Sr. again (well that seemed excessive) so Jr. grabs a rollup, with Sr. grabbing his hands to retain the title at 10:31.

Rating: C. This was the next match in the “well, here are a bunch of people” series of matches on the show. I’ve never gotten the logic of these matches as you have people getting falls in a minute when usual matches take five times as long as one elimination here. At the same time, Chavo just keeps the title, making this quite the uninteresting showcase, save for Kidman’s big spots.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. They talked trash to each other at the Royal Rumble and then Lesnar interfered in said Rumble to help eliminate Goldberg. Then Goldberg cost Lesnar the WWE Title so we have this match, with Steve Austin as guest referee. As a result, the feud wound up being Lesnar vs. Austin, as Austin gave Goldberg the idea to help cost Lesnar the title. Then Lesnar stole Austin’s ATV and Goldberg was just kind of there too. Oh and both Goldberg and Lesnar are leaving after the show and everyone knows about it.

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Steve Austin is guest referee. Lesnar and Goldberg do their big entrances and we immediately hit the YOU SOLD OUT chants (pick your target). They stare at each other for almost a minute and Austin tells them to go at it. Now it’s the Goodbye Song as I try to get my mind around the idea of Lesnar having a tiny goatee coming in. They stare at each other some more as commentary talks about Lesnar going to the NFL.

There’s no contact for the first two minutes so Austin stares at both of them as he figures out that this is going to be a long night. They finally lock up after about 2:50 and that stays on for nearly 40 seconds with both of them letting go. They fight over another lockup, and by fight I mean they’re standing there with their arms around each other’s heads. Fans: “THIS MATCH SUCKS!”

Lesnar grabs a headlock for the first offensive move about five minutes in. They trade shoulders with neither going anywhere so they go nose to nose to yell at each other. The double shoulder puts them both down and then stare at each other a bit. Goldberg FINALLY picks him up in a gorilla press for a spinebuster but the spear only hits buckle. After a GOLDBERG SUCKS chant, Lesnar throws him back inside for some suplexes and a standing choke as Lawler desperately tries to turn this into a Raw vs. Smackdown thing.

That goes on for a long time as well until Goldberg fights out and they collide again, earning some straight booing. Goldberg fights up again and hits some clotheslines into a swinging neckbreaker. The spear gets two so Goldberg yells at Austin, allowing Lesnar to come back with the F5 for two. Now it’s Lesnar yelling at Austin, meaning he misses a spear of his own. Goldberg hits the spear and the Jackhammer gets rid of Lesnar for about eight years.

Rating: D-. Of course the match is terrible and a form of torture in 14 states, but there is some kind of perverse entertainment out of the whole thing. This wasn’t designed to be an entertaining match but rather two guys just messing around until they did a few things and called it a match. It’s an all time mess, but it’s a bit different than a match being a wreck just because it isn’t any good. This one is so bad that it’s fun in a way, which is a very different thing.

Post match we get beer and Stunners as the fans are pleased with Austin for knocking out those two after that match.

Wrestlemania XXI is in Los Angeles.

In a very nice moment, Vince McMahon comes out to thank the fans for being there for twenty years of Wrestlemania. This is the kind of genuine feeling moment that you do not get in modern WWE and it was kind of sweet.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. Basham Brothers vs. APA vs. Too Cool

Too Cool (Scotty 2 Hotty/Rikishi) are defending and again it’s one fall to a finish. Benjamin jumps Bradshaw to start and gets kicked in the face for his efforts. Doug Basham tags himself in and suplexes Benjamin down for two, with Haas having to make the save. Back up and Benjamin slams Doug onto Haas’ knee and it’s off to Scotty to run Haas over.

That lets Scotty stop to dance but he gets thrown over the top. Scotty is fine enough to skin the cat but Haas catches him on his shoulders, allowing Benjamin to hit the running jump onto his back. The Bashams come in and hit a double suplex on Scotty to take over as the heat segment in the second four way Tag Team Title match on a four and a half hour show continues.

Scotty finally flips out of a belly to back suplex and the hot tag brings in Rikishi to clean house. Haas takes the Stinkface and Bradshaw fall away slams Doug over the top and onto a pile on the floor. The Clothesline From Bradshaw hits Danny but Rikishi takes Bradshaw out and sits on Danny to retain at 6:03.

Rating: D+. It was about the same as the first four way, but this would probably be the first match that needed to be cut to trim some of the time off this very long show. Rikishi and Scotty are another on the long list of forgotten teams to hold the titles and it isn’t like this was anything memorable either.

Dancing ensues post match.

Edge is coming back after over a year away with a neck injury.

Here is Jesse Ventura to interview someone so he picks…..Donald Trump, who happens to be in the front row. Jesse plugs the Apprentice and suggests that he is going to run for President, even asking for Trump’s financial and moral support. Sure, and we’ll move on as fast as we can.

Women’s Title: Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Victoria is defending and this is title vs. hair, which was the only way they could get this match on the show so the two of them immediately agreed. Molly forearms her down to start and hits a running hip attack in the corner. Back up and Victoria spins out of a wristlock and Molly needs an early breather. She gets back in and grabs a snap suplex for two on Victoria, setting up a basement dropkick for two more.

The neck crank is on as Lawler goes into a discussion of Molly’s underwear. JR: “What does that have to do with this wrestling match?” Victoria fights up and hits a powerslam for two as JR wants some hot tea. Molly is sat on top and comes back with a sunset bomb for two of her own. For some reason Molly tries the Widow’s Peak (Victoria’s finisher) but Victoria reverses into a rollup to retain at 4:54.

Rating: C. They were victims of the time problems again here as there is only so much you can do in less than five minutes. The good thing is that the two of them are talented enough to make something out of nothing so the match was certainly watchable, even if it was more about setting up the post match stuff. It’s literally a case of this being the best WWE could give them though and that is better than just cutting the match.

Post match Molly tries to run away but gets sleepered out and tied in the chair for the big hair cut.

We recap Kurt Angle vs. Eddie Guerrero for the WWE Title. Angle attacked Eddie because he didn’t want a former drug addict as the WWE Champion (the future would not be kind to this story for Angle). Therefore, it is time for a real hero to take the title but Eddie isn’t standing for this. Smackdown General Manager Paul Heyman has gotten in on Angle’s side and has helped him destroy Eddie more than once, including once when Eddie’s hands were handcuffed behind his back. Now it’s time for revenge.

Smackdown World Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Eddie is defending and the haircut is continuing as Angle makes his entrance. They start slowly with Eddie actually taking him down but making the mistake of trying to go amateur with him. Angle’s headlock takeover works rather well but Eddie as we get the LET’S GO ANGLE/ANGLE SUCKS chants. Eddie gets a fireman’s carry takeover but Angle flips over into a front facelock without much trouble.

A backdrop gets Eddie out of trouble and he armdrags Angle over into an armbar, setting in the frustration. Angle fights up and gets an abdominal stretch to stretch Eddie’s abdominals before hitting a German suplex. The second is escaped and Eddie winds up on the apron, where he has to block the German suplex to the floor. A dropkick puts Angle down but Eddie’s big dive only hits the barricade to bang up his ribs even more.

Some shoulders to the ribs set up a bodyscissors but Eddie jawbreaks his way to freedom. That lasts for all of two seconds as Angle drops the ribs across the top rope and snaps off an overhead belly to belly. Now it’s a waistlock to stay on the ribs and another belly to belly gives Angle another two. Eddie manages a quick knockdown though and goes up for the frog splash, which only hits mat.

The frustrated Angle starts throwing right hands, which just fire Eddie up enough to start his comeback. The rolling German suplexes cut that off in a hurry but the Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag. Two Amigos connect until Angle picks the ankle but Eddie kicks him off immediately. Eddie goes up but Angle is right there with the run up the ropes belly to belly superplex for the big crash back down.

Angle runs him over again though and the straps come down, setting up the Angle Slam. Eddie breaks that up as well and it’s a DDT to set up the frog splash for a rather close two. The ankle lock goes on again so Eddie rolls him outside and starts untying his boot to loosen the pressure. Back in and the angry Angle grabs the ankle lock, only to have Eddie kick him away and lose his boot. Angle is so stunned that he gets small packaged to retain Eddie’s title at 21:33.

Rating: A-. This was more about the psychology as Angle was hyper focused and Eddie eventually suckered him in with the boot. It made for a great finish, but it also came after an awesome match with Angle taking Eddie apart as only he could and Eddie having to survive. The ending was a very Eddie way to retain the title and that grin is hard to turn down. Absolutely a Wrestlemania match and an instant classic that doesn’t get the credit it deserves.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kane in the return of the Dead Man. Kane had turned on Undertaker and buried him alive (again) because he thought Undertaker was going soft. Then the gong went off at the Royal Rumble and Kane realized he was in trouble. Now Undertaker is back and it’s time for some revenge.

Kane vs. Undertaker

It’s the first time the Dead Man has been back since 1999 and Paul Bearer is right there with him. We also have torch bearing druids, because you always need torch bearing druids. Kane is already panicked and shouts that Undertaker isn’t real, because somehow Kane still doesn’t get how Undertaker works. Undertaker finally starts punching away against the ropes and they head to the floor for a slugout. That goes to Undertaker, who hits the apron legdrop to stun Kane again.

Back in and Kane kicks him in the face and it turns into a slugout on the mat for a change. The side slam plants Undertaker again, setting up the top rope clothesline for two. Undertaker fights right back with more right hands and tries Old School, which is pulled out of the air by the throat. The chokeslam plants Undertaker but Kane poses instead of covering. Undertaker sits up and stares at Kane mid pose, meaning it’s time for the real beating. Right hands, the chokeslam and the Tombstone finish Kane to make it 12-0 at 6:55.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t about the match but rather Undertaker being back, so there was no reason to believe that Kane was any serious threat. What mattered here was having Undertaker get back in the ring and destroy Kane because he is back in a big way. Kane was the designated victim here, which has been the case for him so many times now that he should be used to it.

We recap HHH defending the Raw World Title against Shawn Michaels and Chris Benoit. Michaels and HHH went to a draw at the Royal Rumble so HHH retained the title. Then Benoit jumped to Raw and said he wanted the Raw World Title. The contract signing was set but Shawn ran in to interrupt, saying he needed that one more shot. He took out Benoit and signed the contract, because WWE continues to not get how contracts work. Steve Austin then made the match a triple threat, with Shawn being the most wedged in challenger of all time.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Benoit

HHH is defending in his weird white boots look. We go old school with the weapons check before Benoit sends HHH outside to start. That leaves Benoit to miss a backslide and Crossface on Shawn, who grabs a rollup for two. A northern lights suplex gives Benoit two but HHH is back in. Shawn has to skin the cat to get back inside, where he tosses Benoit out instead.

HHH is set outside as well, where he and Benoit are taken down by a baseball slide. Shawn’s big moonsault to the floor puts everyone down for a change until Benoit is left alone on the outside. The Pedigree is broken up by a returning Benoit, who fires off knees to Shawn’s ribs and sends him into the post. Shawn is fine enough to come back and tie Benoit in the Tree of Woe but HHH cuts Shawn off again.

The flying forearms drops HHH and Shawn nips up, only to have Benoit toss him outside. Benoit loads up the Swan Dive but gets crotched by Shawn, who misses Sweet Chin Music to HHH. A DDT sends Shawn outside and a superplex gets six (which is somehow not three) on Benoit. The Crossface goes on out of nowhere so Shawn has to dive in for the save. That earns Shawn some rolling German suplexes into a Swan Dive for a rather close two as HHH is still down.

Now it’s Shawn making the comeback and hammering on Benoit, who gets sent outside. HHH gets superkicked for two with Benoit making the save so everyone goes outside. Shawn gets posted and busted open so Benoit puts on the Crossface, with HHH having to grab the hand to block the tap. HHH sends Benoit into the steps and loads up the announcers’ table (it wouldn’t be Wrestlemania without it), with Shawn helping on a double suplex to put Benoit through said table.

NOW we get the big HHH vs. Shawn slugout, because that’s what the two of them probably wanted this to be the whole time. Shawn whips HHH over the corner for the crash to the floor, with HHH coming up bleeding. Back in and Shawn slowly gets the better of things but a quick Pedigree takes him down.

Benoit has to come back in for the save before sending Shawn outside. The Sharpshooter has HHH in trouble so Shawn breaks it up with the superkick for a delayed two. Benoit sends him outside and reverses the Pedigree into the Crossface. HHH can’t get the rope and Benoit rolls into the middle of the ring for the tap and the title at 24:08.

Rating: A+. Yes it’s still a masterpiece with nothing close to a misstep or weak part and that is not something you get to see very often. All three worked hard and at the end of the day, Benoit won clean over HHH via submission in the middle of the ring. This felt like the main event of a milestone show and it was an incredible match which has not gotten old every time I have seen it. That is hard to do and it certainly deserves the honor.

Benoit gets the HUGE celebration with the confetti falling. Eddie Guerrero comes in for the shot that is now iconic for all the wrong reasons and JR’s voice gives out with the shouting to end the show.

Well almost, as we get the highlight reel to really wrap it up.

Overall Rating: B. In case it wasn’t clear throughout, there are more than a few matches on this show that feel like they are there for the sake of getting people on the card. If you get rid of those matches, this is an all time classic, as well as having the show be under four hours. The rest of the show is pretty much an all timer (Goldberg vs. Lesnar aside) with the matches either feeling important or being great. Just trim it down and stop cramming things in and it’s that much better. It’s absolutely worth a look if you have seen it before or not, but have the fast forward button ready.

Ratings Comparison

John Cena vs. Big Show

Original: C-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D+
2022 Redo: C

Booker T/Rob Van Dam vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Dudley Boys vs. La Resistance

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2022 Redo: C-

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B-
2018 Redo: B
2022 Redo: B

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

Original: A
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B
2018 Redo: B+
2022 Redo: B+

Torrie Wilson/Sable vs. Stacy Keibler/Miss Jackie

Original: F
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: N/A
2018 Redo: N/A
2022 Redo: N/A

Cruiserweight Open

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D
2022 Redo: C

Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: F
2013 Redo: E
2015 Redo: F
2018 Redo: F
2022 Redo: D-

Too Cool vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. Basham Brothers vs. APA

Original: D
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2018 Redo: D-
2022 Redo: D+

Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Original: D+
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: C-
2018 Redo: D+
2022 Redo: C

Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Original: A
2013 Redo: A
2015 Redo: A
2018 Redo: A
2022 Redo: A-

Undertaker vs. Kane

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D+
2018 Redo: D
2022 Redo: D+

Chris Benoit vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A+
2018 Redo: A+
2022 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: B
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: A-
2018 Redo: B+
2022 Redo: B

I think we’ve found about the definitive ratings for this one, or at least as close as you’re going to get after five looks at it.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Survivor Series 2007 (2022 Redo): A Little Top Heavy

Survivor Series 2007
Date: November 18, 2007
Location: American Airlines Arena, Miami, Florida
Attendance: 12,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz, Joey Styles

It is pretty rare when you have a true one match card but that is what we have here, as Batista is defending the Smackdown World Title against the Undertaker inside the Cell. There might be a few other things going on here, but that has been treated as the be all and end all of the show, as it should be. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at the history of the Survivor Series before we move on to this year’s preview.

ECW World Title: Miz vs. John Morrison vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and for the sake of sanity, I’ll only refer to him as champion. It’s a brawl to start with Punk getting double teamed down into the corner. Morrison catapults Punk into the corner but he comes out with a middle rope crossbody. Punk knocks Miz to the floor but the springboard clothesline is broken up to put Punk down again. Miz breaks up Punk’s springboard with a shot to the floor though and it’s a camel clutch to Punk.

That means Morrison comes in for the save, setting up a backbreaker into a neckbreaker to drop Punk again. A suplex from the apron gets two on Miz but he is right back with a running corner clothesline. Punk is back in with a hurricanrana to send Morrison into Miz for a powerbomb and a near fall. The running knee in the corner sets up the corner bulldog to give Punk two on Miz and a double underhook backbreaker onto the knee gets the same. Morrison is back up to go after Miz, only to be sent outside. That leaves Punk to GTS Miz and retain.

Rating: C+. Miz and Morrison’s rise continues as the two of them have become rather dependable on ECW, and now elsewhere. It makes sense to give them the Tag Team Titles and now we should be seeing even more of them. This was a good way to get the show going as Punk has to work to retain and Miz and Morrison have come far enough that they didn’t seem like cannon fodder.

We look at MVP turning on Matt Hardy, costing the two of them the Tag Team Titles.

MVP says Matt will not be wrestling tonight because he can’t walk. He is tired of being Matt’s latest crutch and he is better than any of his opponents tonight.

Beth Phoenix/Melina/Jillian Hall/Layla/Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Mickie James/Maria/Torrie Wilson

One fall to a finish rather than elimination rules. Michelle suplexes Victoria to start and then kicks her in the face for two. Torrie comes in and gets swung into the side slam, only to come back with a suplex. It’s off to Jillian vs. Kelly, with the latter grabbing a rollup for two of her own. Phoenix comes in and plants Maria but a missed charge allows the hot tag to James to clean house. Everything breaks down and Mickie hits the Long Kiss Goodnight to finish Melina.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? It was a bunch of the good women vs. the bad women and there is only so much you’re going to get from a match like that. They didn’t have time to do anything and given some of the skill levels of the women involved, that is not a bad idea. The positive sign is that the women are making progress, but a lot of them still aren’t ready to be in a match like this. Leave this thing to Raw.

William Regal and Coach are ready to see Hornswoggle get crushed by Great Khali.

Randy Orton is ready to disappoint everyone and break the Heart Break Kid.

Shawn Michaels wants revenge. And the title.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch vs. Hardcore Holly/Cody Rhodes

Holly and Rhodes are challenging. Rhodes and Cade start things off with Cade grabbing a hiptoss for some early celebrating. A sunset flip gives Cody one and the headlock goes on. That just earns Cody a backbreaker to cut him off so it’s off to Murdoch for a change. Cody takes him into the corner and it’s Holly coming in to forearm away. The hanging kick to the low abdomen has Cade in trouble and the champs need a breather on the floor.

Back in and it’s an atomic drop into a running boot to Holly’s face as Murdoch takes over again. Cade atomic drops Murdoch into a legdrop on Cody for two more and we’re off to the chinlock. Holly suplexes his way out of trouble but Cade is right there with a clothesline. The second atomic drop/legdrop misses though and it’s Cody coming in to very little reaction to clean house. Everything breaks down and Murdoch Code Reds Cody to retain.

Rating: C-. This would have been fine on any given Raw, meaning it was a pretty disappointing pay per view match. Cade and Murdoch are fine as champions and Rhodes and Holly are getting there as a veteran/rookie team, but they aren’t ready for this kind of a match on pay per view. It was far from bad, but this match was sent out there to die and I think WWE knew that was going to happen.

Team HHH, which is down a man due to Matt Hardy’s knee injury, is ready for Team Umaga. Rey Mysterio talks about being an underdog, but that has never been Kane’s thing. Kane brings up the Katie Vick incident (and goes into details). Then Jeff Hardy reminds HHH of the time he put Jeff in the hospital. HHH: “Uh, my bad.” HHH says this is the night when they can come together and do something terrible, so let’s go do it.

Team Umaga vs. Team HHH

Umaga, Mr. Kennedy, Finlay, Big Daddy V, MVP
HHH, Jeff Hardy, Kane, Rey Mysterio

Matt Striker is here with Big Daddy V. Rey and Kennedy get things going and it’s an early exchange of arm cranking. A running headscissors takes Kennedy down and a Code Red gives Rey two (so based on the previous match, Trevor Murdoch is better at Code Redding than Rey Mysterio). Hardy comes in and gets blasted by Kennedy so MVP comes in for a front facelock.

It’s off to V and the big beatdown ensues, only to have Hardy dive over for the tag to Kane. V belly to belly suplexes him down but Kane is right back up with a top rope clothesline. That doesn’t seem to bother V though as he hits a pair of drops (Samoan and elbow) for the elimination. HHH comes in to slug away on V but a clothesline puts him straight down. Umaga comes in with a belly to belly of his own but misses the middle rope headbutt.

That means Rey can come back in and the basement dropkick gets a quick two. The 619 into the springboard seated senton for two more but the springboard crossbody is countered into a wicked release Rock Bottom. The Samoan Spike gets rid of Rey and it’s 5-2. Kennedy tags himself in for some reason and misses a charge into the corner. Hardy misses the slingshot dropkick in the corner though and it’s MVP coming in with a chinlock. MVP misses a running kick though and the Twist of Fate gives Hardy a fast elimination.

HHH comes back in for a clothesline on Kennedy and the spinebuster follows. V comes in for the save but elbows Kennedy by mistake, allowing HHH to steal the pin. That doesn’t work for V, who pulls HHH outside and posts Hardy for a bonus. Back in and a double DDT plants V and HHH evens it up at 2-2.

Finlay starts dropping elbows on HHH before dropping some elbows on HHH. Back up and HHH makes it over for the tag without much effort and Hardy comes in with the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Whisper in the Wind hit Finlay and the mule kick hits Umaga, allowing HHH to come back in. There’s the spinebuster to Finlay and the Pedigree leaves us with HHH/Hardy vs. Umaga. HHH avoids the running hip attack in the corner and it’s the Pedigree into the Swanton for the final pin.

Rating: B-. Not one of the all time classic Survivor Series matches but they set up HHH and Hardy as a pair of buzzsaws to run through the rest of the team. The HHH vs. Umaga feud has been pretty much decided multiple times now so the ending wasn’t exactly in doubt. This was more or less the Raw main event and it could have been worse, but I could have gone for a lot better for the one elimination match on the show.

We get a preview of Batista vs. Undertaker with a look at their Cell match in Smackdown vs. Raw 2008. Why Batista is wearing a Tag Team Title to the ring isn’t clear.

Vince McMahon sits down with Hornswoggle to explain why he made the match with Great Khali for tonight. Some people think that it is because Vince hates him, but it is really because he wants Hornswoggle to rise up like the McMahons do. Vince has been an underdog against Time Warner and the US government and he won. Now go win against Great Khali.

Great Khali vs. Hornswoggle

Shane McMahon comes out to introduce Vince McMahon and then Hornswoggle for some family flavor. We even get an old school explanation of the rules as the fans want Shaquille O’Neal (in the front row) to help Hornswoggle, but Vince grabs the mic and says he doesn’t care what the fans want. Hornswoggle kicks the knee and then dropkicks Runjin Singh through the ropes. The green mist sets up some right hands but Khali chases Hornswoggle off. The distraction lets Hornswoggle grab the shillelagh but Vince takes it away. Khali loads up the Vice Grip, only to have Finlay come in for the DQ.

Rating: D. What is there to say about something like this? The match was a segment instead of anything competitive and that is all it was ever going to be. At the end of the day, the Hornswoggle/Vince story has run out of steam and adding Finlay into the mix isn’t likely to make things that much better. Maybe they can shift things around, but Vince needs to be on to something else.

Post match Finlay destroys Khali with the shillelagh and a low blow, allowing Hornswoggle to escape.

Wrestlemania XXIV is in Orlando.

We recap Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels for the Raw World Title. Michaels came back in September and went after Orton, who had put him on the shelf. Orton kept getting superkicked but got disqualified last month. Now Michaels wants revenge but can’t use the superkick. If he does, the match is instantly over, but if Orton tries to get disqualified, he loses the title.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Shawn Michaels

Michaels is challenging and we even get a weapons check. Feeling out process with Michaels grabbing a cravate of all things to start. Orton can’t even slam his way out of the cravate but he can drive Shawn into the corner for some right hands. Michaels is right back with a choke on the back before switching to a front facelock as you can feel the anger and hatred here.

Back up and Orton is sent outside, with Shawn hitting an Asai moonsault to take him down. They get back inside with Shawn grabbing a…..wait for it…..Sharpshooter. Orton makes the rope and gets in a poke to the eye, setting up the hanging DDT for two. Shawn fights up and slugs it out, setting up the forearm. More right hands have Orton in trouble but he’s right back with a dropkick for two.

Some slams give Michaels a breather and the top rope elbow looks to set up Sweet Chin Music. That’s a head fake though and they trade some rollups for two each. Michaels grabs a Crossface instead but Orton gets a foot on the rope. The backbreaker cuts Michaels off again but he counters the Punt into an ankle lock of all things. The grapevine goes on in the middle, only to have Orton kick his way to freedom. Michaels’ Figure Four attempt is countered with a kick into the post so he teases the superkick but gets RKOed to retain Orton’s title.

Rating: B. Pretty good here, but the amount of stipulations they had going on made it a little difficult to believe that they were going to change the title here. Shawn not using the superkick at the end looked a bit awkward though and the ending only worked so well. They had a good match otherwise though, which has to be expected when it’s Shawn vs. Orton getting time.

Post match Orton talks trash to Shawn and gets superkicked.

SAVE US!

The Cell is lowered.

We recap Batista vs. Undertaker for Batista’s Smackdown World Title. They’ve fought several times this year and Batista finally beat him for the first time last month. Now it’s the big final showdown inside the Cell.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Batista is defending inside the Cell. They start fast with Batista hitting a hard clothesline but having to elbow his way out of a chokeslam attempt. Undertaker punches him into the corner and hits Snake Eyes into the running big boot. The chair is brought in but Batista spears him down. Undertaker’s clothesline gets two this time and they head outside with Undertaker hammering away.

A face rake against the Cell sets up a chair to the throat has Batista in a lot of trouble so Undertaker chairs him in the ribs for two. Old School is countered into a spinebuster (that was cool) for a delayed two and it’s time to slug it out again. Batista’s running powerslam gets two and they head outside with Undertaker getting blasted with a clothesline. Undertaker is fine enough to whip him into the steps and now a chair to the head has Batista busted open.

Old School is broken up again and Batista hits a superplex but Undertaker pulls him into the triangle choke. Since we’re in the Cell, the rope breaks the hold (erg) and they head outside again. This time Batista hits him in the face with the steps and now Undertaker is busted open too. Back in and a chokeslam gives Undertaker two but the Tombstone is countered into another spinebuster for another near fall.

It’s table time, with Batista tossing him through it for two more. The Batista Bomb onto the steps is countered into a backdrop onto the steps. Undertaker plants him with the chokeslam for two, followed by another onto the steps….and a cameraman breaks it up. That’s because the cameraman is Edge, who cameras Undertaker in the head. A Conchairto on the steps knocks Undertaker silly and Edge puts Batista (who saw nothing) on top to retain.

Rating: B+. These two beat the heck out of each other and it felt like a war, with the Edge interference being a great surprise to give them a back door out of the match. What mattered here is they kept things high impact here, which is exactly what these two do best. Let them go in there and hit all their power stuff until one of them can’t get up, which granted was due to some help in this case. You can all but guarantee the triple threat next month and that is a fresh way to go, so nicely done.

Post match, Edge takes Undertaker down again and leaves to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main events carry the show, but there is a really big gap between the top of the card and everything else. Even the third biggest match on the show doesn’t feel that important as the whole show was built around Batista vs. Undertaker. The show was a fun enough watch, but outside of the main event, it doesn’t feel like a lot of this matters in the long run.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Survivor Series Count-Up – 2002 (2017 Redo): Those Are Some Big Odds

Survivor Series 2002
Date: November 17, 2002
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 17,930
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

Dudley Boyz/Jeff Hardy vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

Stacy Keibler introduces Saliva to perform Always live at the World. At least we get some highlights for the show as a bonus.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Jamie Noble

Back in and Noble reverses a backslide into the tiger bomb for two but makes the mistake of putting Kidman on the top. A good looking super DDT plants Noble but since DDTs mean nothing, Jamie is right back up for a hanging DDT off the top for his own near fall. An enziguri drops Noble again and, after a failed Nidia distraction, the shooting star gives us a new champion.

Victoria is getting ready but apparently her mirror thinks Trish Stratus is prettier.

We recap Victoria vs. Trish. Victoria claims that Trish slept her way into a job after WWE wanted to sign both of them. Now Victoria is here to get revenge on her former friend. The music sounds like the shower scene from Psycho for a nice touch.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Heyman and Show run to the parking lot and drive away.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle vs. Los Guerreros vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Eddie gives Edge the frog splash but Benoit breaks it up with a Swan Dive for no apparent reason. Angle comes back in with the ankle lock on Eddie while Benoit Crossfaces Edge, only to have Chavo save Edge with the title. Kurt picks up the title so Benoit thinks it was him, leaving Edge to spear Benoit for the first elimination. That leaves us with two but Benoit and Angle wreck everyone before heading to the back. What poor sportsmanship.

Shawn Michaels is ready to talk about why he believes he can win but RNN BREAKING NEWS tells us that Randy came here to watch. Luckily a sexy flight attendant gave him an extra pillow so there was no further damage to his shoulder.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T. vs. Kane vs. Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Rob Van Dam

Ratings Comparison

Dudley Boyz/Jeff Hardy vs. Rico/3 Minute Warning

Original: B

2012 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: C+

Billy Kidman vs. Jamie Noble

Original: C+

2012 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: C+

Victoria vs. Trish Stratus

Original: C-

2012 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B-

Big Show vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: D-

2012 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C-

Los Guerreros vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Benoit vs. Edge/Rey Mysterio

Original: B

2012 Redo: B+

2017 Redo: B

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH vs. Booker T vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Kane vs. Chris Jericho

Original: B

2012 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: B-

2012 Redo: C+

2017 Redo: C+

I must have been in a REALLY bad mood when I watched the main event for the second time.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/02/20/survivor-series-2002-the-longest-rant-about-anything-ive-ever-done/

And the 2012 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2015/11/10/survivor-series-count-up-2002/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Smackdown – July 4, 2008: They Did It Better Than Raw

Smackdown
Date: July 4, 2008
Location: Tulsa Convention Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Mick Foley, Jim Ross

We’re into the new reality around here as both Night Of Champions and the full Draft are done. There is only one World Champion after Edge lost his title to CM Punk on Raw, meaning HHH is once again on top. Other than that, we should get to see how some of the new stars mesh with what’s left of the old. Let’s get to it.

Here is Night Of Champions if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at the 4th of July and talks about how the wrestlers get to live the American Dream with live action fireworks.

Opening sequence.

We open with MVP’s VIP Lounge. MVP wastes no time in bringing out his guest, the still World Champion HHH. After a nice hello, MVP congratulates HHH on his win at Night Of Champions and welcomes him to Smackdown. It’s been a long time since HHH has been here but he is already a big fan of MVP. HHH appreciates the bling and the Power Ranger outfit that MVP wears when he wrestles.

MVP says it’s cutting edge technology and Olympians wear it to compete. HHH says that sounds like a performance enhancer and MVP might get thirty days off. With that shrugged off, MVP brings up that he makes more money than HHH, who could see how that would make some people angry. Not that it matters as he would rather be a 12 time World Champion rather than the biggest waste of money in Smackdown history.

HHH is out here to get a rub from MVP though and he has some special footage. MVP doesn’t like that, so he says let’s play footage instead. We get a recap of CM Punk winning the Raw World Title and retaining it over JBL in the main event, followed by a brawl with security to end the show. Back in the arena, HHH says Edge got Punked out and MVP says Edge got his punk card pulled.

The jokes continue until Vickie Guerrero, back in the wheelchair, interrupts. HHH wishes her well on her upcoming wedding. HHH: “Imagine: marrying the boss to get ahead. Who thinks up that kind of stuff?” HHH thinks she and Edge just need to go to Vegas because he knows a great drive thru place. You don’t even need to be conscious!

Vickie brags about Edge’s success against Batista, but HHH says looking at her, there are things Edge would do that HHH would never do. Vickie doesn’t get what he means but eventually tells him to shut up. Edge is on his way here and speaking of Edge, HHH will be defending the title against him at the Great American Bash.

Michelle McCool vs. Victoria vs. Cherry vs. Maryse vs. Kelly Kelly

Star on a pole match with the winner facing Natalya, on commentary and now a redhead, for the Divas Title. A quick brawl to start leaves Kelly as the only one standing but Victoria knocks her off the pole. Cherry cuts Victoria off before Maryse has to knock Michelle down. A double electric chair drops Maryse and Cherry catapults Kelly into the corner. Victoria adds the slingshot flipping legdrop to Cherry and goes up. That’s cut off as well so Michelle kicks Maryse down and wins.

Rating: D+. What are you supposed to say about this? It’s the kind of match that is all about one thing and not exactly having much to do with wrestling. This felt like something out of another company and it really doesn’t fit with what they’ve been trying with the women in recent weeks. Michelle finally gets put into the title match, which is long overdue as she has been the obvious pick for a long time now.

Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come in to see Vickie Guerrero, who wants to know where Edge is. They don’t know, so she asks them about Edge losing the title on Raw. Vickie blames them both and gives them a match with Jesse and Festus. That’s a punishment?

Edge arrives and a lot of people look at him in silence.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Jesse And Festus

Festus is dressed as Uncle Sam. Hawkins and Ryder jump Festus to start and are quickly shrugged off, setting up a middle rope Hart Attack. Jesse has to fight out of a double team in the corner but gets pulled into another corner to begin the beating. Hawkins grabs a Russian legsweep for two and we hit the neck crank. Jesse is able to get over to the corner for the tag to Festus so house can be cleaned in a hurry. With Hawkins sent to the floor, a seated senton and the fireman’s carry flapjack (with a great sell from Ryder) finishes for Festus.

Rating: C. This was in fact a Jesse and Festus match and that’s about as good as it’s going to get for them. The team isn’t overly interesting and the one joke of Festus losing it at the bell has long since used up its usefulness. It’s not like Hawkins and Ryder are great, but they’re a heck of a lot better than the other choice.

Post match Edge comes to the ring and beats on the catatonic Festus as Hawkins and Ryder make Jesse watch. Edge throws in a nasty chair shot to the head and stares down at Festus.

Post match Vickie Guerrero tries to calm Edge down but even the Great American Bash match doesn’t make it better. Vickie mentions giving him permission and Edge loses it, saying she doesn’t understand what is going on. He has been at this for sixteen years to the day but Vickie cuts him off, saying she is still his boss. She calls him a fool and Edge storms out.

Jeff Hardy vs. John Morrison

Hardy shoves him down to start so Morrison grabs the arm to slow things down. Morrison gets sent outside and a slingshot dive….doesn’t launch as Hardy head fakes him instead, setting up a dive off the apron instead. Back in and Morrison hits a running knee to the face for two but the Flying Chuck misses. Hardy’s slingshot dropkick in the corner is broken up though and Morrison drops him out to the floor in a crash.

We take a break and come back with Morrison working on an armbar before blocking a Whisper In The Wind attempt. The armbar goes back on, allowing commentary to talk about Edge and Vickie Guerrero. Morrison cuts off a comeback attempt by sending him shoulder first into the post but Hardy counters a dive with a sitout powerbomb. Hardy fights up with some forearms and a cradle gets two. The Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy two but Morrison Pele kicks him on top. The Moonlight Drive doesn’t work for Morrison though and it’s the Swanton to give Hardy the pin.

Rating: B-. This was the “Hardy is here and he’s good on his own” match of the show. It worked well with these two showing the same chemistry they’ve had before, with Hardy showcasing his ability to fight from behind. Morrison feels good on his own too, making for a nice match.

Video on Maria.

Umaga vs. Funaki

Umaga wastes no time in knocking him into the corner and a superkick puts Funaki down as well. Foley even goes inter promotional by saying this is like Mark Henry beating up Colin Delaney on ECW. The running hip attack in the corner sets up the Samoan Spike for the squash pin.

Edge is ranting to Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder when he is told that Vickie Guerrero wants to see him. He goes to Vickie’s office, where she goes on about how she is going to be in the wheelchair with back problems for life (keeping in mind that she was standing earlier tonight). Edge says not to talk to her in that gibberish, so Vickie screams at him to GET OUT. That’s exactly what he does, with the door closing behind him. Edge walks a bit, then turns around and tries to get back in, but the door is locked.

US Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Hardy is defending and Bam Neely is here with Chavo. It’s a brawl to start with Matt running Kennedy over but Kennedy is back up with a kick to the face. Kennedy clotheslines Chavo in the corner but Benjamin is back up with a kick of his own. Chavo is back up to take Benjamin down, only to have Benjamin toss him into the air for a nasty crash. Matt and Kennedy put the other two down before knocking each other down as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy cleaning house as Foley compares this to Barack Obama vs. Hilary Clinton. Everyone but Chavo is caught in a Tower Of Doom but Benjamin is up to suplex Chavo down. Neely distracts Benjamin though and Chavo gets to Three Amigos Matt. The frog splash gets two as Kennedy makes the save. Matt hits a quick Twist of Fate on Chavo before dropping Kennedy onto Neely. Benjamin comes in and gets Twist of Fated onto Chavo, with Matt pinning the latter to retain.

Rating: B-. I believe they call this a sprint, as they were packing in whatever they could for about ten minutes. The 4th of July aspect meant that this more or less had to be the main event and it was a good match as a result. Matt retaining is a fine way to go too, even if getting the US Title off of ECW is not a bad idea.

Here is Edge, without music, for a chat. Edge says this will be his first and last statement about what happened on Raw. He was attacked twice on Raw and now he is going to get the World Title back at the Great American Bash. Ever since he came in here tonight, he was feeling the disrespect, including from Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder, who should have been trying to make him happy.

He didn’t even receive the support of Vickie Guerrero, who should be there for him in his time of need. Therefore, Edge is going to let us in on some dirty little secrets, but here is a screeching Vickie (walking) to interrupt. She asks what Edge is doing so Edge walks up to her. Edge says the wedding is off, leaving Vickie to scream a lot and take off her ring to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The wrestling was good enough here (ignoring the stupid women’s match) and having Edge’s breakdown throughout the show made it work better. They have at least a main event set for the Great American bash and there is time to set up the rest of the card. Nice show here, as they didn’t have a bad lull after getting the new roster set up.

 

 

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Smackdown – June 27, 2008: Find Your Balance

Smackdown
Date: June 27, 2008
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 14,748
Commentators: Jim Ross, Mick Foley

The Draft has come and gone and now we have a new lineup around here. Some of the moves should make for some nice changes, though this is also the go home show for Sunday’s Night Of Champions. It should be interesting to see what happens with the new stars and the old stories, though Night Of Champions could be quite the endpoint for a lot of stuff. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Draft recap.

Vickie Guerrero is rather sad as we hear about Vince McMahon nearly being crushed during Million Dollar Mania. She hopes Vince isn’t confined to a wheelchair like she is. That moves us on to how great Smackdown is, because she and Edge are getting married soon. With that out of the way, here’s new broadcaster Jim Ross!

Here is HHH to get things going. He talks about how crazy Vince McMahon is and makes jokes about how everything came crashing down on him. Anyway, for the first time in six years, he’s part of Smackdown and he sees the familiar faces of Mick Foley and Jim Ross. HHH says jr would be the one person he would pick to bring here with him (JR: “Thank you.”) so he’s home.

HHH gets in the self described sucking up to the fans before getting to the self described shilling of Sunday’s pay per view. The title is what matters so here is Edge to interrupt. Edge says this is special and big because the two best around are in the ring. He’s heard rumors that they can’t get along but Edge thinks they can make it work. HHH says they both have massive egos and he can see that his is way bigger than Edge’s.

The other difference: HHH will still be champion after Night Of Champions. Edge points out that he can actually beat Batista, unlike HHH. This is Edge’s house and show, so HHH needs to show him some respect. Cue Batista to interrupt and spear Edge down without much trouble. Batista even steals the title for a bonus. That was kind of a cool segment, with the mini Evolution reunion working.

Kane/Big Show vs. MVP/Mark Henry

Henry has been added to the ECW Title match at Night Of Champions after beating Kane on ECW. Kane and MVP start things off with the latter kicking away at the legs until an uppercut drops MVP. It’s off to Show to unload in the corner and knock MVP down without much effort. Henry comes in to cut off the power advantage so it’s right back to Kane. It doesn’t go so well this time around as Henry takes him into the corner for a boot to the head from MVP. Kane fights up so MVP tells Henry to do this himself and leaves…but Henry throws him back inside. The chokeslam gives Kane the fast pin.

Rating: C. Not a bad match here and Kane continuing his dominance of MVP is amusing for some reason. It makes sense to keep everyone but MVP strong as MVP doesn’t exactly have much going on at the moment. This was more about letting Kane get some heat back after his loss to Henry on ECW and it worked just fine all things considered.

Vickie Guerrero discusses wedding plans with Alicia Fox but Edge interrupts. Vickie tells him to not worry about Batista because he’ll be gone. He’ll even get the title back tonight.

Video on Umaga.

Finlay/Hornswoggle vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Ryder drives Finlay into the corner to start but an atomic drop breaks that up in a hurry. Hawkins comes in and misses a baseball slide, allowing Finlay to unload with forearms. Back up and Finlay sends Hawkins outside, setting up the Celtic Cross to Ryder. The Tadpole Splash finishes for Hornswoggle.

Post match Miz and John Morrison come out for the staredown.

Matt Hardy vs. Edge

Non-title. They fight over wrist control to start until Edge grabs a drop toehold to continue to technical opening. Back up and Matt hits the running corner clothesline into the bulldog for two as commentary isn’t sure if that would be an upset (yes, it would be). We take a break and come back with Matt blocking the Edge-O-Matic. Edge gets sent outside and Matt nails a clothesline off the apron but a cheap shot cuts Matt off back inside.

Choking on the ropes sets up a running crotch attack to the back of the neck and Edge kicks him in the chest. The cravate has Matt in more trouble but he fights up and grabs the Side Effect for two. That lets Foley get in a Get Smart reference, making him all the more swell. A DDT gives Matt two but he misses the moonsault. Edge misses the spear but gets two off a backslide with his feet on his rope. Back up and the Twist of Fate is countered into the spear to give Edge the pin.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together and the ending sequence was good. I’m not wild on seeing the US Champion losing but at least it was to someone higher up on the food chain. Edge gets some momentum heading into his title match on Sunday while Matt…eh he’s defending against Chavo Guerrero so he’ll be fine.

Night Of Champions rundown.

Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool/Cherry vs. Victoria/Natalya Neidhart/Maryse

Michelle and Maryse start things off with Michelle cranking on the arm. Maryse immediately bails out to bring Victoria in, with Kelly coming in as well. Foley remembers wearing chaps like Kelly and JR backs away as fast as he can. Cherry comes in and bulldogs Kelly for two as they’re rapid firing through the tags. It’s back to Michelle for a basement dropkick on Natalya, who is right back with the a wheelbarrow hot shot. The surfboard has Michelle in more trouble, followed by the chinlock.

That’s broken up with a chinlock but Victoria comes in to cut Michelle off again. The standing moonsault gives Victoria two as Foley wants to see more of Kelly’s chaps. Foley: “I’m just trying to give you a little Jerry The King Lawler JR.” Kelly gets in a kick to the ribs, setting up one of the most freezing cold tags I’ve ever seen as Cherry comes in. A neckbreaker gets two on Maryse but Natalya gets in a cheap shot from the apron. Everything breaks down and Maryse rolls Cherry up for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t exactly good and I have no idea why they haven’t just announced Michelle for the title match yet. She’s the most obvious pick they could have but they’re still playing the “who is it going to be” nonsense. Am I supposed to believe that Cherry is getting a title shot? Anyway, this match was pretty lame, as it was almost Michelle in a handicap match.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Domino

Kozlov powers him into the corner to start and works on the arm. A shot to the chest sets up an overhead belly to belly suplex but Domino manages to drop him with a jumping elbow. Back up and Kozlov kicks him in the face, setting up the reverse DDT for the pin, though he had to work a bit more here.

Rey Mysterio, on the way to the ring for his final Smackdown appearance, runs into Hornswoggle for some odd…uh, looking at each other.

Here is Rey Mysterio for his final Smackdown appearance. He came to Smackdown six years ago with a heart full of dreams. Thanks to the fans, he became Cruiserweight Champion, Tag Team Champion and the World Heavyweight Champion. Smackdown will always have a place in his heart but now he is heading to Raw. The fans are offered to come along with him and we get some nice words in Spanish to wrap things up.

Batista vs. Umaga

Umaga runs him over to start and then breaks up an early Batista Bomb attempt. A splash gives Umaga two and there’s a hard kick to the back of Batista’s head. Batista gets whipped hard into the corner and we hit the nerve hold. Umaga cuts off the comeback with a kick to the face and a jumping headbutt puts him down again. We’re off to another nerve hold but Batista fights up. A slam attempt doesn’t work so Umaga knocks him back into the corner to hammer away some more. Umaga misses a splash and hits the ring post though and there’s the spinebuster. Cue La Familia to jump Batista for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not the most exciting match here as Umaga almost squashed him until the run-in ending. Umaga needed the boost after spinning his wheels for a long time, though having him do this to the #1 contender was a little strange. The bigger problem here was the match being rather slow though as these two have never had much chemistry together.

Post match the big beatdown is on but HHH makes the save to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There were some good parts here but it wasn’t their best show. The problem is they were trying to build to the show with the old lineup but then had to introduce the new wrestlers. That made for a weird balance and they only kind o pulled it off. Things will be in their new normal next week though and that should make things a lot better.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – June 10, 2008: Please Help

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: June 10, 2008
Location: Save Mart Center, Fresno, California
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Mike Adamle, Tazz

Things took a step back in time last week as it seems like we are on the way towards Miz/John Morrison vs. CM Punk/Kane again. That isn’t the most thrilling concept at the moment, but it isn’t like there is anything else going on. As usual, ECW feels pretty creatively out of gas but maybe they can change it up a bit in the Draft later this month. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Kofi Kingston/Evan Bourne vs. Mike Knox/Shelton Benjamin

Bourne was formerly known as Matt Sydal and we get a quick insert interview where he gets to introduce himself. Knox and Bourne start things off with Bourne’s jumping kick not having much effect. Instead Knox takes him into the corner so Benjamin can come in for a clothesline. That earns Benjamin a jumping spinwheel kick to the face and it’s off to Kofi vs. Knox. Kofi hammers away in the corner and hits some dropkicks (this is a rather kick heavy match) but Benjamin’s distraction lets Knox come back with a heck of a clothesline.

Benjamin grabs the reverse chinlock but Kofi fights up and hits another dropkick. Knox is back in there to cut him off so Kofi kicks him a few times and gets over to Bourne. A pop up hurricanrana into a dropkick rocks Knox, who kicks Bourne in the face. Everything breaks down and Kofi hits Trouble In Paradise, allowing Bourne to hit a top rope dropkick to a laying/seated Knox (that didn’t seem to go as it was supposed to) for the pin.

Rating: C+. It was a fun match but the kicks thing became a joke by the end. It’s still effective enough but that was more than a little weird to see. What matters is Bourne gets a nice start in WWE and Kofi gets to regain some of his momentum. Nice start here, and it’s nice to see some fresh names getting a chance.

A never before seen blonde is waiting in Teddy Long’s office when Armando Estrada comes in, looking for Long. He just stepped out, so Estrada brags about being the former GM. Long comes in and introduces the blonde as his new personal assistant Tiffany. Estrada wants a contract and gets a chance to earn one tonight if he can beat Finlay. Tiffany gets in the holla holla holla.

Victoria vs. Kelly Kelly

So Long’s catchphrase is holla holla holla and Kelly’s song starts with “holla holla” (or something close to it). That’s quite the theme. Victoria mocks Kelly’s stretching before the bell so Kelly sweeps the legs and gets some terrible right hands. Kelly tries to do it again and gets kneed in the face, allowing Victoria to send her shoulder first into the buckle.

We hit the chinlock, followed by a chinlock, and then another chinlock (Victoria might want to work on her variety) until Kelly fights up and grabs a headscissors out of the corner. A victory roll gets two but Kelly gets sent to the apron. Another headscissors is blocked with a simple shove on to the floor (for a heck of a face first bump)….and the referee calls it because Kelly is out. I guess it was a better bump than I thought.

Rating: C. The ending wasn’t quite what I was expecting but it does seem that Kelly is getting better in the ring. She’s still not great, but she is able to do some stuff that makes her look a bit more competent. Victoria is still one of the best hands around despite feeling like a relic from a generation gone by.

Finlay vs. Armando Estrada

Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Estrada jumps him in the corner to start and hammers away as well. Finlay gets a boot up in the corner though and the seated senton has Estrada in more trouble. The Celtic Cross finishes Estrada in less than a minute.

Post match Teddy Long comes out and says Estrada has another match right now.

Armando Estrada vs. Colin Delaney

Finlay gets in a shillelagh shot before the bell and Delaney hits a DDT for th pin in less than ten seconds.

Hold on though as Long has one more match for Estrada.

Armando Estrada vs. Hornswoggle

Tadpole splash finishes in less than ten seconds. Finishes for Hornswoggle if that wasn’t clear.

The three winners dance…and then Finlay hits Delaney with the shillelagh, apparently for Delaney giving him Hornswoggle’s hat.

Here is Mark Henry for a chat. He addresses Big Show’s challenge for a fight last week and says he’s here right now. Cue Show, and Henry looks rather shocked at these developments. Henry congratulates Show on becoming #1 contender and wants the first shot if Show wins, but for now he’ll settle for a handshake. They shake hands but Show doesn’t let go, because he knows what Henry is doing. If Henry keeps campaigning for an a** whipping, he’ll get elected. That’s enough for Henry to leave, with Show promising to win the ECW Title at Night Of Champions.

Tag Team Titles: Kane/CM Punk vs. Miz/John Morrison

Kane and Punk are challenging and Kane runs into Show on the way to the ring. Punk and Morrison trade hammerlocks to start until Morrison kicks him down. Miz comes in and gets elbowed in the face before Punk sends him out to the floor. Punk hits a slingshot dive to drop Miz again and we take a break. Back with Kane seemingly trying a cross armbreaker on Miz but Miz reverses into some forearms to a downed Kane.

They get back up and Kane hits a side slam but Miz gets in a cheap shot to bring Morrison back in. Morrison grabs the chinlock before Miz hits the running corner clothesline. Kane manages a backdrop and hands it back to Punk (who is holding his ribs after the dive before the break). Punk’s ribs are good enough to slam Morrison and fire off some knees in the corner. The snap powerslam gives Punk two but everything breaks down. Miz and Kane go outside and Morrison kicks Punk in the bad ribs. The Moonlight Drive retains the titles.

Rating: C+. Mr. Money In The Bank loses again as that tends to be the case far too often. The problem continues to be that these people have little to do other than face each other, but it does make me wonder why Big Show isn’t involved in this whatsoever. He’s the #1 contender to Kane but Kane is busy doing this instead. I’m not sure I get that.

Overall Rating: C. There are at least some different people involved in some things around here and that helps, but the main event didn’t do much in the way of keeping things interesting. Other than that you had more Estrada/Delaney stuff and Show vs. Henry teased, but at least Tiffany and Bourne are some fresh blood. The Draft needs to help this show, but I’m not entirely sure that is going to be the case. For now though, this could have been worse.

 

 

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Smackdown – June 6, 2008: It’s Something New

Smackdown
Date: June 6, 2008
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We FINALLY have a new Smackdown World Champion as Edge (with all of his friends helping) defeated Undertaker in a TLC match to win the title. In addition, Undertaker is officially gone from WWE and I know Edge won’t be bragging about that in the slightest. We are less than a month away from Night Of Champions and that show could use some attention. Let’s get to it.

Here is One Night Stand if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of TLC, with Edge stealing the title. Actually not really as anything goes, so I guess it was clean? Kind of?

La Familia is in the ring, with Vickie Guerrero (back in the wheelchair after walking at One Night Stand) introducing Edge to quite the negative reception. They all have champagne as Edge thanks everyone, but especially Vickie herself. Edge talks about how Vickie completes him, because she made this happen. As for Undertaker, Edge would have run him out of here anyway so Undertaker should thank him. Edge: “May he rest in peace.”

Vickie announces that she and Edge are getting married in five weeks on July 11, but cue Batista to interrupt. Batista doesn’t know why he wasn’t invited to the party but he just wants to wish them luck. Actually he just wants to wish them bad luck and ugly kids because he doesn’t like either of them!

Either way, he wants a World Title shot, but Vickie gives him an eight man tag tonight where he can face La Familia while teaming with three partners…of Vickie’s choosing. Oh and if he loses, no title shots EVER! They certainly hit the ground running here after One Night Stand and that is a good thing, as Edge really needed to face someone new after that never ending feud with Undertaker.

Finlay vs. Chuck Palumbo

This is a Belfast Brawl (street fight) with Hornswoggle in Finlay’s corner. Hornswoggle goes after Palumbo’s bike and gets shoved down to start, meaning Finlay is ready to fight fast. Palumbo gets in a few right hands on the floor and it’s already time for some weapons. A drop toehold sends Palumbo face first into a trashcan but he’s back up with a right hand. Palumbo takes off a turnbuckle pad so Finlay gets the shillelagh, earning himself a big boot. With Finlay down, Palumbo loads up a chain but Hornswoggle hits him low, allowing Finlay to get in a chain shot to win.

Rating: C. That should end the feud but it’s kind of amazing to see how much Palumbo has gotten out of the whole thing. Finlay never was able to get the better of him without help and Palumbo dominated a lot of their time together. Not great here, but you’re only getting so much out of a five minute street fight.

MVP is in a sky box and doesn’t seem pleased with Finlay and Hornswoggle.

Here is Big Show, with a heck of a black eye, to brag about winning the Singapore cane match and say he’s on to a bigger challenge in Kane. Cue Mark Henry to interrupt because he remembered Show telling him to pick on someone his own size. Then he got involved in a match involving STICKS. Show got beaten up to look like that, and we see Show going face first into the steps to bang up his eye. Show is ready to fight but Henry walks away.

We see WWE accepting an award at a film festival involving the military. I believe we saw this a few weeks ago.

Great Khali vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce starts for the team and is promptly caught in the claw. Domino comes in and gets kicked in the face so they’ll try some double teaming. Khali has no time for this and hits a pair of chokebombs for the pin. Total destruction.

Vickie Guerrero talks to the Divas and compares herself to the Fabulous Moolah. She wants her own Women’s Champion though, so the Divas Title is coming. Tonight, we’ll crown one of the competitors. This has to happen as you can only have random matches for personal issues for so long.

We recap Jimmy Kimmel’s Cousin Sal, as trained by Roddy Piper, vs. Santino Marella. A lot of this is cut off of Peacock, likely due to trademarked footage.

Santino Marella vs. Cousin Sal

Roddy Piper and Jimmy Kimmel is here with Sal, who is in a kilt. Sarah Silverman is here in the crowd for a bonus. They circle each other to start as we hear about how much Sal has waned to do this over the years. Sal grabs a headlock and Santino might need to rethink this. We get the airplane spin and a suplex for two on Santino as Kimmel looks like he’s seeing an amusing dog trick. Kimmel offers a distraction and Sal gets a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. I almost didn’t rate this but it was officially a match. No this wasn’t anything from a quality standpoint and that wasn’t why they did it. This got them on Jimmy Kimmel Live and tied some things into that with the Piper appearance so it’s hard to complain. Nothing match, but they were in and out in less than six minutes.

Post match Santino jumps Sal but Piper saves Kimmel.

MVP is still not impressed.

Post break Sal is getting checked out by Kimmel, who won’t let Sal talk for some reason. Kimmel has Sal’s next opponent, and brings in Big Show for some clowning.

Miz and John Morrison mock Hornswoggle but Finlay comes in (complete with green hat) to scare them off.

Edge talks to Chavo Guerrero, who he wants to be the best man. He’s going to be Uncle Edge after all! Chavo is in and we get an awkward hug.

Kelly Kelly vs. Layla vs. Maryse vs. Cherry vs. Natalya vs. Victoria vs. Michelle McCool

This is the Golden Dreams match, meaning there’s a gold star on a pole and the winner is in the Divas Title match. Everyone goes for the pole to start and that quickly devolves into a huge brawl. The ring is cleared save for Michelle and Natalya, with Michelle kicking her out and going up. Maryse makes the save, followed by Layla and Victoria doing the save. Natalya powerbombs Victoria and Michelle down and grabs the star for the title shot.

Million Dollar Mania press conference video.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

Kozlov grabs a front facelock to start before kicking Yang in the face. The half crab goes on so Kozlov can yell a lot but he misses an elbow. Yang kicks him in the head, only to miss an elbow. Kozlov finishes with a belly to belly.

Batista is ready for Edge and company.

La Familia vs. Batista/???/???/???

Batista’s partners are Nunzio, Funaki and Colin Delaney. Batista and Ryder start things off with Batista not having much trouble. Chavo comes in and gets Jackhammered for two so Batista Rocket Launchers Delaney onto Chavo for two more. We take a break and come back with the villains taking turns on Delaney.

Edge grabs a headlock and forces Delaney to tag Funaki (sidenote: Foley points out that Nunzio and Funaki are former Cruiserweight Champions and very well could cancel out the Edgeheads. That might not be the story they are going for, but it’s accurate.), who gets beaten down for a change. Ryder’s chinlock goes on before it’s back to Edge, who counters the tornado DDT without much trouble. Funaki avoids a charge and Batista gets the tag to clean house. Edge breaks up the Batista Bomb and everything breaks down. Batista hits a double spear and the Batista Bomb finishes Hawkins.

Rating: C+. They were telling a story with Batista overcoming the odds here and, as Foley pointed out, Nunzio and Funaki have had some success before so they could have been worse. Batista getting the win should set him up for Night Of Champions, but odds are he has some more hoops to clear first. As commentary was pointing out though, with Undertaker gone, who else is there to come after Edge?

Overall Rating: C. The idea of Edge vs. Batista is nice and they do need a Women’s Title here, but the rest of the show wasn’t exactly must see. You had a bunch of short matches, including the pole match, and that doesn’t exactly make for a strong middle of the card. There are worse shows, but this didn’t give me confidence on the way to Night Of Champions.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi – May 13, 2008: Here We Go Again?

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: May 13, 2008
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Mike Adamle, Tazz

Last week’s show was the 100th episode so we’ll start on the second century. It’s the final show before Judgment Day and the ECW Champion isn’t defending his title at the show. Instead, Kane and CM Punk are teaming up to challenge Miz and John Morrison for the Smackdown Tag Team Titles. That isn’t going to leave much in the way of a build here but maybe they can come up with something else. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Colin Delaney beating Armando Estrada in a huge upset to earn a contract last week.

In the back, Estrada warns Delaney that he hasn’t been in any real pain yet. Delaney signs and is told he gets to face Mike Knox tonight.

Opening sequence.

Miz vs. CM Punk

Miz has John Morrison stay in the back for this one. Punk wrestles him down to start but Miz blocks the running knee in the corner. Some elbows to the chest set up a crossface chickenwing, but Punk is right back up. A slingshot necksnap over the middle rope gives Miz two as they’re certainly starting fast here. Miz grabs the chinlock, followed by a reverse chinlock to change things up a bit. Punk fights up and snaps off a powerslam, followed by a leg lariat. The GTS is broken up and Miz grabs a neckbreaker….for the clean pin.

Rating: C+. It was a fast paced match and that made for an entertaining opener, but were they mad at Punk or something? Miz getting a win over Punk is one thing but a completely clean one is almost hard to fathom. It’s probably the biggest singles win of Miz’s career, but that’s just a weird loss, at least in this fashion, for Punk.

Cherry/Kelly Kelly/Michelle McCool vs. Layla/Victoria/Natalya

Natalya drives Michelle into the corner to start before handing it off to Victoria to start in on the arm. An armdrag gets Michelle out of trouble and it’s Cherry coming in to kick away. Natalya grabs a chinlock but Cherry channels Michelle with an armdrag of her own. This one doesn’t actually work though and it’s Victoria coming back in with a slingshot flipping legdrop. Victoria spends a bit too much time swinging at the other two though and a rollup gives Cherry the pin.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one but you can see that the division has come a very, very long way. Victoria is good as the veteran who is helping the new generation along and McCool has turned into a rather acceptable hand. Natalya is coming along and Kelly….yeah they’re going to push her as a star because of how she looks, ability or not.

Shelton Benjamin wants to get back on track after back to back losses to Kofi Kingston. Cue Kofi, who wins a quick brawl.

Video on Randy Orton vs. HHH.

Video on Colin Delaney’s path to the ECW roster.

Colin Delaney vs. Mike Knox

Delaney has some snazzy, upbeat music. Knox runs him over, hits a splash in the corner, and finishes with the swinging Downward Spiral in about a minute.

Post match Armando Estrada comes out to say he wants a rematch, because he is officially part of the roster (with a very lucrative salary).

Armando Estrada vs. Colin Delaney

Shouting and a Curtain Call finish Delaney in about thirty seconds.

Kane vs. John Morrison

Non-title and Miz is here with Morrison. Kane gets taken into the corner for some shots to the knee, which is wrapped around the rope. That’s broken up and Kane chokes him over the shoulder. Morrison slips out and kicks away, only to get stomped down again. Kane’s missed charge lets Morrison slug away in the corner, with Miz grabbing the foot for a bonus.

That’s enough to draw out CM Punk to even things up as we take a break. Back with Kane grabbing a chinlock, with Morrison going to the leg to get out. Some right hands in the corner and a chop block take Kane down as Morrison is showing the same intensity he was displaying last week. Morrison’s leglock sets up a basement dropkick for two before he wraps the leg around the post.

Kane punches his way out of trouble but Morrison takes him right back down by the leg. Another comeback works a bit better as Kane fires off the uppercuts and grabs the side slam. The leg is ok enough for the top rope clothesline but Miz offers a distraction. Punk is sent into the steps (bad night for him), allowing Morrison to get in a title shot. The Flying Chuck finishes Kane off.

Rating: C+. When did Morrison start getting all aggressive and such? It makes for a rather different person and I’m kind of digging what he’s been doing lately. Much like the opener, it’s a bit weird to see this result, but at least Morrison had to cheat to get there. This was a long match and had a purpose for Sunday so we’ll call that a nice way to go to wrap up the show.

Post match Kane is ticked off but gets beaten down again to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The opener and main event carried most of the show, though having Delaney back to being a punching bag isn’t the most thrilling way to go. The women’s match wasn’t great and that’s more or less the show. Having two big matches around here is better than nothing though and I’ll take that for a show with only so much to build towards on Sunday.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 9, 2008: Yeah Get Him Out Here

Smackdown
Date: May 9, 2008
Location: Labatt Center, London, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Mick Foley

The World Title scene was shaken up last week as Vickie Guerrero stripped the Undertaker of the World Title due to using his choke. That is going to have to be rectified and that could take a little while to make happen. Believe it or not, Undertaker is not happy about this and odds are we are going to see him do something about it here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vickie Guerrero stripping the Undertaker of the title, which earned Great Khali an extra beating as Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder stole the title belt.

Here are Vickie Guerrero (as wheeled by Teddy Long) and Edge to get things going. Vickie reads a prepared statement about how she didn’t want to strip Undertaker of the title but she had no choice. There will be a title match at Judgment Day, with Undertaker being one of the participants, though he still cannot use the choke.

As for his opponent, we will have a Championship Chase, featuring former champions from ECW and Smackdown. We hear the names of tonight’s participants, who will have qualifying matches, with an “over the top rope challenge” (battle royal for you normal people out there) later tonight for the title show. Edge and Great Khali both happen to be out due to injuries, which sounds eyebrow raise inducing.

Opening sequence.

Championship Chase: Matt Hardy vs. CM Punk

Non-title and Punk is seeming very excited about getting a chance to be champion (as he should be). Hardy works on a hammerlock to start and gets Punk to the mat, plus the ropes for the opposite effect. Back up and Punk tries to sit down on a sunset flip but the banged up arm won’t let him in something you don’t see very often. Hardy electric chairs him out of the corner and grabs a Side Effect for two. Punk’s running knee (against the ropes this time) sets up the bulldog for two of his own but the GTS is blocked. Instead Punk faceplants him and tries la majistral but Matt stacks him up for the pin.

Rating: B-. Punk got beat here but the fact that he is still in a spot like this is a good sign for his future. Matt getting the win to even the score (after Punk beat him last month in the King of the Ring) and a third match wouldn’t be the worst idea. For now though, Hardy can go into the battle royal tonight without taking a pin as champion and that’s a good thing.

Post match Punk gives Matt an “ok you got me” look.

Championship Chase: MVP vs. Finlay

This could be interesting and Hornswoggle is here with Finlay. Hold on though as Hornswoggle throws in some tennis balls for a distraction, allowing Finlay to hammer away to start. Finlay wins a grapple off until MVP makes the ropes, only to get kicked down again. MVP manages to send him shoulder first into the post for a breather and the Fujiwara armbar goes on.

We take a break and come back with MVP still working on the arm. Finlay fights up with a clothesline, albeit with the bad arm, allowing MVP to hit a boot to the face to put Finlay outside. The boot to the arm only hits steps instead but MVP goes right back to the arm to keep him in trouble.

Finlay reverses into a leglock and then slams him leg first into the ropes, allowing Foley to talk about how the ropes took his ear off one night. MVP goes back to the arm, which is reversed into another leglock to send MVP over to the rope. Back up and Finlay grabs a belly to back suplex and it’s the old double pin as neither gets a shoulder up in time.

Rating: B-. I was getting into this one with the battle of limb cranking and it was turning into a question of who was going to break first. At the same time though, the ending was quite deflating as that finish isn’t the most thrilling. Hornswoggle not interfering was a bonus too, but I was hoping for a better, or at least more one sided, finish.

Kelly Kelly vs. Natalya

Victoria is here with Natalya, who snaps off a suplex to start. Michelle McCool is watching in the back as Kelly gets in a kick to the head for a breather. The handspring elbow is cut off though and Natalya plants her with another belly to back suplex. Kelly is sat on top and pulled back down in a crash, setting up the Sharpshooter to give Natalya the win. This was little more than a squash.

We get some fan reactions to Vickie Guerrero stripping Undertaker of the World Title.

Vickie Guerrero says MVP and Finlay are both advancing.

Championship Chase: John Morrison vs. Batista

The chase is on to start with Morrison managing a quick dropkick through the ropes. Back in and Batista manages the shoulders in the corner but Morrison hits another dropkick to send Batista back outside. A ram into the steps keeps Batista in trouble and a missile dropkick gives Morrison two. The spinning legdrop gets the same but Batista fights up again. This time though the spear hits the corner, where Morrison fires off some right hands. The Batista Bomb out of said corner doesn’t work but Batista spears a springboard out of the air. Now the Bomb sends Batista to the battle royal.

Rating: C+. Morrison looked more like a star than he ever has before here as he was being aggressive with the kicks working well. There was no way he should have been beating Batista here, but giving him a run for his money was interesting. Pushing Morrison on his own wouldn’t be surprising, but for now, the Miz/Morrison team is working well enough that there is no reason to split them up just yet.

Long recap of Undertaker being stripped of the title last week.

Quick recap of the Championship Chase.

Championship Chase: Big Show vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer is all banged up after an Extreme Rules match on ECW. Show headbutts him down a few times and finishes fast with the chokeslam. Total destruction.

Championship Chase: Chavo Guerrero Jr. vs. Kane

Non-title, Bam Neely is with Chavo and even commentary points out how many times we’ve seen this match. Kane powers him into the corner to start and a gorilla press plants Chavo. A big boot misses though and Chavo slowly starts working on the leg. Neely gets in a shot of his own, allowing Chavo to rain down right hands in the corner.

Kane’s knee gives out as he tries to escape, meaning we’re off to a leglock. Make that a Muta Lock, which means it can’t stay on as long. Kane fights up and hits a big boot but the side slam is escaped, allowing Chavo to take him down by the leg again. Chavo loads up a sunset flip but Kane sits down on it for a surprise pin.

Rating: C-. I think we’ve made the point clear with these two but that has never stopped them so far. Thankfully Kane is moving on to a quick feud with Miz and John Morrison, as he certainly needs to get away from Guerrero for a bit. The match was nothing special, but that might be due to how many times I’ve seen it in recent months.

Deuce N Domino have fired Cherry and replaced her with Maryse. That earns Maryse a slap in retaliation.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Phil Atlas

Kozlov knocks him around, hits a headbutt, a kick, and the reverse DDT for the fast pin. Same as we’ve seen from Kozlov and it’s still working.

Championship Chase Finals

Big Show, MVP, Finlay, Matt Hardy, Batista, Kane

The winner faces Undertaker at Judgment Day for the vacant World Title. It’s a brawl to start with MVP being sent outside (under the ropes) as people start taking their shots at Big Show. Kane and Show trade uppercuts until Batista breaks it up. Show shrugs them off but can’t get rid of Finlay. Everyone but Show is knocked down and we take a break. Back with all six still in it and MVP hitting and running.

MVP finally tosses Hardy to get us down to five before switching over to Finlay. Batista manages to spear Show down and Kane knocks Finlay out, leaving himself as the only one standing. Back up and MVP misses the running boot in the corner and eliminates himself so we’re down to Kane, Batista and Big Show. Make that two as Show dumps Kane and we get the big staredown.

Batista is knocked under the bottom rope and out to the apron, only to come back in where he gets dropped with a clothesline. A drop toehold of all things sends Show into the corner but the Batista Bomb attempt is pretty easily blocked. Show powers him up, only to get headscissored out to send Batista to…..never mind as here is Vicky Guerrero to introduce Edge as the final competitor. Batista is still on the apron (having gone over the top) so Edge comes in and hits a spear for the win.

Rating: C. I really can’t even get mad at the ending here as you knew Edge was going to get involved somewhere in there. Edge vs. Undertaker III isn’t the most appealing match in the world and it really does feel like they’re going back to the well too often. The problem is there really isn’t another name ready to come after the belt and Vicky being all evil works. It’s kind of the only option they have, but that doesn’t make it interesting.

Post match Edge goes up towards the title (on the stage) but the gong sounds and lightning sets the belt’s stand on fire. Edge panics to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. I can always appreciate a show where there is one major idea set up and getting to the end of it is the entire focal point. That’s what we had here and it went fairly well, with Edge vs. Undertaker III being set up by the end of the show. The wrestling was good enough and they stayed on focus for most of the night. Not a bad night at all, but now they need to get to the other stuff.

 

 

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Smackdown – May 2, 2008: That’s A Good Reason

Smackdown
Date: May 2, 2008
Location: Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Commentators: Mick Foley, Michael Cole

We’re done with Backlash and Undertaker beat Edge again to retain the World Title. That leaves us on the road to Judgment day and odds are the trilogy match between the two is on the horizon. Other than that we are going to need something else around here and we might start that this week. Let’s get to it.

Here is Backlash if you need a recap.

Here is Teddy Long to get things going with a big announcement: the Tag Team Titles, the United States Title and the Smackdown World Title will be defended. It was a bigger announcement when I heard it on ECW but Long’s voice helps anything.

Opening sequence.

Mick Foley is brought out as the new commentator and seems to be popular.

Tag Team Titles: Miz/John Morrison vs. Jimmy Wang Yang/Shannon Moore

Yang and Moore are challenging and I almost had that written down before they came to the ring. Why? Well they’ve lost to Miz and Morrison a few times already and that just isn’t enough to prove a point in 2008 WWE. Moore takes Miz down for a fast two and a legdrop is good for the same. Morrison comes in and gets dropped with a spinning middle rope crossbody for two. Yang sneaks in for two off a dropkick but Morrison pulls him off the ropes to take over for the first time.

It’s back to Miz to grab a chinlock, followed by the running corner clothesline for two. The backbreaker/slingshot elbow combination gives Morrison two more and it’s back to Miz for the seated abdominal stretch. An enziguri gets Yang out of trouble though and the hot tag brings in Moore to clean house. Everything breaks down and Moore’s rollup gets two but the Moonlight Drive (apparently the debut of the name) drops Moore to retain the titles.

Rating: C+. It dragged a bit in the middle but these teams have chemistry together. That being said, it was hard to imagine Moore and Yang winning the titles in the first place and now the best thing we can do is enjoy matches without much drama about the result. The division still barely exists, so can we please get some depth going sooner than later?

ECW GM Armando Estrada introduces the next match.

Colin Delaney vs. Vladimir Kozlov

In a rare instance, neither of them have entrance music. Kozlov knocks him around with ease to start and hits a big boot to the chest. Delaney is sat on top and then thrown back down in a big crash. The reverse DDT finishes fast, with Estrada, who faces Delaney on ECW with Delaney’s future on the line, being rather pleased.

Mark Henry threatens Nunzio with pain during their match tonight.

Natalya/Victoria vs. Michelle McCool/Cherry

This was set up with some patented backstage cattiness. Natalya headlocks Michelle down to start and it’s quickly off to Victoria. Michelle pulls her off the ropes for a crash before a monkey flip puts Victoria down again. Cherry comes in with a high crossbody for two but Natalya trips her down like a villain should. The double teaming is on but Cherry manages to crawl over (despite Natalya holding her foot) for the tag to Michelle. A swinging neckbreaker gets two on Natalya but Victoria shoves Michelle off the top. The crash is enough for Natalya to grab a rollup, with tights, for the pin.

Rating: C. The best thing I can say about this, and most of Smackdown’s women’s matches as of late, is that it felt like a match. It wasn’t the stereotypical Divas stuff, but rather a completely acceptable match. Michelle has come a long way in a short amount of time and I would assume a lot of that is due to working with a veteran like Victoria. That is a great benefit to have and if that is what it is, it seems to be paying dividends.

We look back at Undertaker retaining the World Title over Edge at Backlash but not letting go of the choke. Edge went out on a stretcher and Vickie Guerrero screamed a lot.

Mark Henry vs. Nunzio

Nunzio seems to know he’s about to be in extreme pain….so he brings out Big Show to be in his corner. Nunzio kicks away and it goes as well as you would expect. Henry shove shim into the corner and the World’s Strongest Slam finishes fast.

Post match Big Show gets in the ring and Henry backs off. Show tells him to pick on someone his own size. So not Show, who is 50lbs heavier and eight or so inches taller?

US Title: MVP vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is defending after beating MVP to take the title at Backlash. The referee holds the title up so MVP pulls it away, apparently feeling that it’s his. Matt headlocks him down to start and then does it again for a bonus. Back up and MVP takes it into the corner, followed by a heck of a clothesline. A slightly angrier than usual MVP hammers away and we hit the chinlock with a facelock.

Matt fights up and manages a bulldog for two, setting up the fourth headlock takeover in about five minutes. Since it’s just a headlock, MVP pops up and gets punched in the face for his efforts. The running crotch attack against the ropes gives Matt a weird looking cover for two but MVP clotheslines him down again. Matt gets knocked hard off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with MVP holding a cross arm choke and then slapping on another choke to make it worse. This time Matt fights up and grabs a tornado DDT but MVP hits the running kick to the face in the corner to knock him silly. We’re off to a crossface chickenwing of all things but Matt is back up to slug away. A very out of nowhere Twist of Fate retains the title.

Rating: B-. This was a more aggressive MVP and that style worked well for him. There was almost no way Matt was losing his title so soon after winning it, but this feud certainly deserved a long rematch. I could go for more of the aggressive MVP though as it was easier to take him more seriously. Good stuff here and the best match on the show so far.

Mick Foley is in the ring and brings in Batista, who lost to Shawn Michaels following Shawn injuring his knee. Batista respects Shawn and while he doesn’t like some things Shawn has done, it was Batista’s fault for letting his guard down. We see a clip from the Highlight Reel on Raw, with Chris Jericho accusing Shawn of faking a knee injury. That idea makes Batista sick to his stomach and he hopes Shawn is hurt. If he isn’t, he will be when Batista sees him. As usual, short form Batista is the best Batista and he got his point across fast here.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Festus starts hammering on Hawkins to start and drives some knees to the ribs. As Foley tries to figure out which one is biscuits and which one is gravy, Jesse takes over in the corner. It’s off to Ryder, who takes Jesse into the corner. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Ryder gets two off a neckbreaker. Jesse belly to backs his way to freedom and brings Festus back in to clean house. A splash hits Ryder but Hawkins offers a distraction, allowing Ryder to get in a shot to the throat. Jesse has to come back in and the neckbreaker faceplant gives Hawkins the fast pin.

Rating: C. It’s not easy to get into these matches anymore as it feels like these same teams have been fighting for months now without getting anywhere. Someone solving Festus isn’t the best sign for his future, but it’s even worse for Jesse’s, who only exists as Festus’ partner. Not a bad match, but the tag division outside of Miz and Morrison only feels like filler these days.

Finlay vs. Julio Dinero

Finlay drives a shoulder in the corner to start and drops Dinero with a clothesline. Back up and Dinero is sent outside as Hornswoggle pops out from underneath the ring. A backdrop and the Celtic Cross complete the squash to give Finlay the win.

Post match Hornswoggle hits a Tadpole Splash.

Smackdown World Title: Great Khali vs. Undertaker

Undertaker is defending…or he isn’t, as Vickie Guerrero comes out to say not so fast.

In recent weeks, Undertaker has injured a lot of people with his illegal choke. Therefore, the choke is banned and since Undertaker shows no remorse, the title is vacated. Since Undertaker won’t hand it over, Vickie sends Great Khali down to get it. Khali goes to get it and is kicked in the face. Undertaker grabs the choke as Curt Hawkins and Zack Ryder come down to get the title. The choke stays on so long that Khali is bleeding from the mouth as Undertaker lets go to end the show. That’s certainly a twist and at least gives them a better reason for Edge vs. Undertaker to continue aside from “Vickie says so.”

Overall Rating: C+. The twist ending boosts this up a bit as it makes things that much more intriguing. Unlike Raw, this didn’t feel as much like we’re heading for Backlash II later this month with Judgment Day. Focusing on the titles all night long is not a bad idea, and the MVP vs. Matt Hardy match was good enough for the show’s long wrestling segment. Nice enough show here, and I want to see where the main event story is going so points for getting the important stuff right.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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