Monday Night Raw – March 20, 2006: Well Done

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 20, 2006
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

So we are finally done with everything between here and Wrestlemania, unless WWE brings back some randy episode of All American Wrestling to promote the show. There is still a little more work to do to get to Wrestlemania and there are four shows left to get it all done. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Vince and Shane McMahon cheating Shawn Michaels out of the street fight at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

The Spirit Squad is in the ring to cheer about Shawn tapping and to introduce the McMahon. That means a marching band playing When The Saints Go Marching In, a bunch of confetti, and Vince dancing to guarantee a good opening. Vince praises Shane, who talks about Shawn losing on Saturday. That makes it McMahons 3, Michaels 0, including two pins on one night. Shane knows Vince is going to make it 4-0 at Vince’s greatest creation when he beats Shawn at Wrestlemania.

Vince says Shane is his greatest creation and talks about various horrible things he has done to Shawn in recent weeks. Things are all heading to Wrestlemania though and it is going to be a turning point for him. Shawn is going to crash at Wrestlemania and become his old self again. Just to make it more fun, their match is now No Holds Barred. Shane: “I love it!” As for tonight, Shawn can face HHH. Before we get to that though, here’s John Cena to interrupt.

Vince doesn’t like being disturbed but Cena tells Darth McMahon to calm down. Cena doesn’t want to wait for Wrestlemania because he took a Pedigree on Saturday. Shane gets in Cena’s face and says he doesn’t make the rules around here and threats are made. Cena wastes no time in taking the shirt off but Vince breaks it up and gets annoyed at the CENA chants. As for tonight, Cena can have HHH….when he teams with Shawn against HHH/Shane. Vince dances off as only he can, but Shane is a little unsure about this one.

Post break Shane isn’t sure about this but here’s HHH to say Vince better have a plan. Vince is going to be out there with them.

Carlito vs. Kane

Carlito ducks a right hand to start and slugs away in the corner to as much success as you would expect. A DDT works a bit better as Kane takes a full second before sitting up. The faceplant lets Kane step on Carlito’s head but he comes back with a quick Backstabber. Kane isn’t having any of that and grabs him by the throat, followed by the uppercuts. The top rope clothesline is dropkicked out of the air for two but Kane is back with a big boot. Carlito breaks up the chokeslam, only to springboard into another attempt to give Kane the pin.

Rating: C-. There wasn’t much to see here but that’s not exactly surprising. You can only get so much out of Carlito against a monster like Kane and that doesn’t exactly bode well for the Wrestlemania title match. Chris Masters and Carlito aren’t the best team in the first place and putting them against two monsters because there is no one else to get the shot isn’t a good sign.

The Blackjacks are going into the Hall of Fame. I would have thought they were in before.

Intercontinental Title: Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Rob Van Dam

Shelton is defending but has no Mama. Flair and Van Dam knock the champ down to start and Flair drops a knee. Van Dam’s spinning legdrop lets Flair get two but Rob isn’t happy with the cover. The alliance falls apart in a hurry this time around so Rob gives Flair the spinning legdrop this time around. Rob hits the big running flip dive to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Flair and Van Dam both busted open as their heads collided on the flip dive. Flair stomps Van Dam in the corner but Shelton pokes Flair in the eye to take him down. Rob is sent hard into the post so Flair is left to chop away at Shelton. A Samoan drop into a suplex puts Flair down for two with Rob making a save this time around. Rob grabs a northern lights suplex for two on Shelton but Flair gets in a save of his own.

The spinwheel kick staggers Flair again and Rob follows with Rolling Thunder. Shelton is kicked to the floor and Rob adds the split legged moonsault for two. The champ brings in the title but gets kicked away, leaving Rob to miss the Five Star. Flair Figure Fours Van Dam but Shelton runs in for the cover to pin Flair and retain.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting to and there is a good chance that this is going to shift things over to Shelton vs. Van Dam for the title. Flair has already had his title reign and there is no reason to keep him around the title picture after the losses. Van Dam needs something to get him back into the thick of things and an Intercontinental Title feud would do just fine.

We look at Saturday Night’s Main Event Cutting Edge, with Mick Foley destroying Edge. A Conchairto on the ramp was included.

Here’s a bandaged Mick Foley for a chat. Foley says Edge is speaking the truth when he says that Foley is a big teddy bear. It’s true that Foley has never had the Wrestlemania moment and yes, a few weeks ago he would have said a town’s name, plugged a book no one would read, and then prance around with a sock puppet. Then Edge busted him open with a Conchairto and it was different.

This time it was Chinese food, because just a short while after tasting it, he wanted it all over again. Edge has awakened something inside of Foley and it is known as Cactus Jack. The BANG BANG brings out…actually just Lita this time around. The fans aren’t pleased to see her but Lita says none of them are getting any of her so just shut up. Edge is stuck in Detroit with vertigo so Lita needs to speak to the Winner the Pooh shirt wearing Foley, just for a minute.

See, Edge has an idea: let’s just have a wrestling match at Wrestlemania. That isn’t Foley’s thing, but maybe it could be his Wrestlemania moment. Foley isn’t sold and demands that Lita slap him so Edge can come out here for the cheap shot. He demands that Lita slap him so she does, drawing out Edge. Foley is ready for him though and sends Edge to the floor, setting up the Mandible Claw on Lita to keep Edge from coming in for the big beatdown. Edge is furious as Foley leaves.

Now confirmed for Wrestlemania: Candice Michelle vs. Torrie Wilson in a Playboy pillow fight.

Torrie Wilson vs. Victoria

Hold on though as Candice is carried out on a bed with her big Playboy cover behind it. Candice throws pillows at Torrie and the Widow’s Peak gives Victoria the pin in less than a minute.

Big Show vs. Chris Masters

Show starts with the big chops in the corner and shrugs off Masters’ clotheslines. A superkick drops Masters instead and another shot puts him on the floor. Show follows him and misses a big boot, crotching himself on the barricade. Masters uses the distraction to grab a chair and blasts Show for the quick DQ.

Post match another chair shot lets Masters try the Masterlock but settle for a posting instead.

Here’s Mickie James and there is a big present in the ring. She admits that she did the wrong thing on Saturday and it’s a shame because the two of them could have been beautiful together. There is a silver lining though, because now she can become Women’s Champion. That way millions of girls can look up to her, but she won’t shove them away like Trish did to her. As for tonight though, Mickie has a gift for her. Trish doesn’t come out, so Mickie has the box opened to reveal….a kidnapped Ashley.

Now Trish comes out but as she’s a few feet from the ring, Mickie tells her to stay down or she’ll….I’m not sure what she could do to Ashley in the time it would take for Trish to get inside actually but it stops her anyway. Mickie screams at Ashley but walks too close to Trish, who pulls her out to the floor. Trish goes in to save Ashley, but Mickie gets back in to give Trish the DDT. With Trish out, Mickie kisses her and smiles a lot, despite having a busted nose.

This Week In Wrestling History: Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin in the submission match. I still get something new out of that match every time I see it.

Wrestlemania rundown.

HHH/Shane McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels/John Cena

Vince McMahon is here too. Shawn charges straight at Shane, who runs into the crowd in fear. As security holds Shawn back and Vince does a little Shane dance, Shane sneaks back around (that red baseball jersey is such a great disguise) to ringside but Cena punches him out of the air and we’re ready to go. Hold on though as Vince says that’s a DQ for Cena using a closed fist.

Cena is thrown out under threats of losing the title so let’s have a handicap match.

HHH/Shane McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels

Security holds Shawn back so HHH can get in a cheap shot before the bell rings. Vince has a mic to taunt Shawn as Shane gets in a kick to the ribs. HHH comes in and gets caught with a right hand, only to grab the spinebuster on Shawn. Shane adds an elbow and hands it right back to HHH to unload in the corner.

The facebuster cuts Shawn down again and Vince declares this as brutal. Shawn fights back on Shane though and hits the forearm into the nipup. HHH comes in sans tag so Shawn fights them both off and sends HHH outside. The top rope elbow connects on Shane but HHH breaks up Sweet Chin Music. That means a crotching against the post but here’s Cena to shove Shane off the top. Security comes in for the no contest.

Rating: C-. This was another storyline advancing match as Shawn continues to want to beat the fire out of Vince, who continues to get himself in trouble by not knowing when to let something go. We should be in for a pair of good matches at Wrestlemania, as both of these stories have been set up rather well.

Shawn and Cena clean house but Vince announces himself (with his eyes bugging out) vs. Cena for next week.

Overall Rating: B. I really don’t remember liking the build to Wrestlemania this well as the Raw side has been very good. They have three big matches on the red side and they are making me want to see all three of them. Just keep things going over the last week and then make the show work well in Chicago. Rather strong show here that did everything they needed to do with less than two weeks before Wrestlemania.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Saturday Night’s Main Event #32 (2020 Redo): The Commercialization Of Wrestlemania

IMG Credit: WWE

Saturday Night’s Main Event #32
Date: March 18, 2006
Location: Cobo Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 7,000
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Tazz

And then there’s this, as we need a two hour commercial for Wrestlemania. The main event is a handicap match between the John Cena/HHH (the Raw main event) and Rey Mysterio/Kurt Angle/Randy Orton (the Smackdown main event), though it could wind up at any part of the show. There’s also Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon in a street fight, which could have some strong potential. Let’s get to it.

Vince McMahon and Shane McMahon promise to destroy Shawn Michaels tonight.

Shawn Michaels says if he’s going down, Shane is coming with him.

HHH is going to be champion again at Wrestlemania when he beats John Cena. Cue Cena to say HHH is tagging with the champ tonight.

JBL admits that it was a bad idea to challenge Steve Austin to a beer drinking contest but he’ll teach Austin something tonight.

The Boogeyman is coming to get us.

I miss these fifteen second promos. Why don’t we get these things more often today?

Opening sequence.

HHH/John Cena vs. Randy Orton/Kurt Angle/Rey Mysterio

Cena and Orton slug it out to start but Angle tags himself in and suplexes Cena down. There’s another suplex but it’s too early for the Angle Slam. Instead Cena hits a spinebuster as the arena is rather full of smoke from the pyro. HHH comes in so Angle suplexes him for a change. There’s the tag to Rey for a few near falls on HHH until he pokes him in the eye. Cena shoulders Rey down but a headscissors takes HHH over for a change. HHH pulls Cena out of the way of the 619 and blasts Rey with a clothesline as we take a break.

Back with HHH sending Rey hard into the barricade, much to Cena’s annoyance. Cena won’t tag in but Angle does come in to break up a cover off a spinebuster. The sleeper cuts off the EDDIE chants but Rey is out in a hurry. Rey knocks HHH off the top though and hits the moonsault. A dropkick is enough for the hot tag to Orton, who gets beaten up by Cena in a hurry.

Rating: C. The wrestling wasn’t the point here but it was a good idea to have the pin be a fluke. It also made sense to have such complete insanity for most of the ending, as it fit everything that was going on. None of these people wanted to team together and it wasn’t like this was anything more than a spectacle. They didn’t treat it as anything such either and that was the right idea here.

Cena and HHH pose at each other.

Here’s who is going into the Hall of Fame.

Booker T. has a bad knee and can’t face Boogeyman tonight. Teddy Long cancels the match and Booker limps out of the trainer’s room with Sharmell. They both break into big smiles.

Here are Edge and Lita for the Cutting Edge, complete with a table covered in weapons. Tonight’s guest is Mick Foley, who is so pathetic that all he can do is say a city’s name and put a sock on his hand. That isn’t exactly cutting edge, so Edge wants him out here right now for the Wrestlemania beating.

Cue Foley, with Edge lighting the table on fire. Foley turns it over and beats Edge up before pouring out the thumbtacks. Lita gets in a cheap shot though and Edge knocks Foley onto the tacks. Foley gets up, smiles, and chases Edge up the ramp for a neckbreaker. He even gets extra violent with a Conchairto. Once Edge started talking, this whole thing was only about six minutes long.

Long recap on Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels. They’ve done a very good job of making me want to see Shawn superkick his head off so well done on the build.

Sharmell and Booker have gotten changed and dance in happiness. Cue Boogeyman from the ceiling and they run off screaming through the hall.

It’s time for the beer drinking contest between Steve Austin and JBL, who Texas Two Steps out of the limo. After another opening sequence for the second hour (or second hour and ten minutes or so), JBL talks about how happy NBC is to have him on the show. JBL gets in the insults to Detroit, including the jokes about the carmakers, the labor unions, the mayor, and of course the sports teams. He’ll win the US Title at Wrestlemania and make everything better, but here’s Austin in the truck to cut him off.

Austin says it’s good to be on this show and back in Detroit, but he’s thirsty. He doesn’t understand why JBL challenged him to the contest and thinks JBL is about 6’1 and 205lbs. JBL tries to correct him and talks about drinking a case of beer for breakfast and fifteen pitchers for lunch. That sends JBL into a rant about how Austin tries to buck the system but here are the rules for the contest. Austin: “All right.”

JBL has Canadian beer and they each have 25 beers with a minute to drink each. He insists that they go back to back, with JBL insisting that he isn’t Brokeback Mountain. Austin: “No comment.” JBL mentions the one minute time limit and Austin asks if he’s a one minute man. JBL: “You been talking to my wife?” They start, with JBL pouring his beer out instead of drinking it. Austin calls him out so JBL throws a beer at him and runs. Cue Chris Benoit to throw JBL back in for more beer dousing and the Stunner to complete the extended cameo.

Candice Michelle and Victoria admire Candice’s Playboy cover.

Candice Michelle/Victoria vs. Trish Stratus/Mickie James

JR: “Mickie James is a little psycho.” We get a recap of Mickie’s obsession with Trish and we’re ready to go. Trish and Candice start things off, so of course we get the Go Daddy dance. Candice chokes away both with hands and rope, allowing Victoria to get in a kick to the face. The slingshot flipping legdrop gives Victoria two and we hit the front facelock. The fans are rather pleased with Mickie bouncing on the bottom rope to cheer Trish on and Trish throws Victoria off. Victoria is smart enough to knock Mickie off the ropes, only to walk into Stratusfaction for the fast pin.

Post match Mickie says this is goodbye, but she wants to say it the right way. She tries to kiss Trish but only gets the cheek, allowing Mickie to hit the Chick Kick and scream a lot. Mickie even hits the Stratusfaction, with Lawler saying she doesn’t get even but she gets odd.

During the break, Mickie says she loved Trish and shouts if Trish loves her now.

Wrestlemania rundown, including Booker T. vs. Boogeyman.

Here are Mark Henry and Daivari for a chat. After a video on Henry attacking Undertaker and the casket match being set up as a result and a break, Daivari rants about how Henry isn’t scared of anything, including Undertaker. Henry says Undertaker is afraid of him and he will shove Undertaker into the coffin.

There’s the gong and the druids bring out the casket, followed by Undertaker himself. After the long entrance, the slugout is on with Henry running him over. They head outside with Undertaker whipping him into the steps and then chokeslamming Daivari onto the casket. A Tombstone puts him onto the casket as well as Henry is gone.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

Street fight and Vince is here with Shane. Shawn runs up the ramp to jump Shane and we start in a hurry. A chair goes over Shane’s back and Shawn loads up an early table. Vince gets in a cheap shot from behind to put Shawn down though and Shane throws in a ladder. Shawn goes back first into the post twice in a row and Shane climbs the ladder. Shawn doesn’t stay on the table long though and superplexes Shane from the ladder (in the ring) through the tables (on the floor) for the huge crash to send us to a break.

Back with Shawn knocking Shane down again and loading up the ladder in the corner. Shawn climbs said ladder but Vince gets in a few kendo stick shots to the back to knock him back down. Shane drops the ladder onto Shawn’s back and Vince is rather pleased. It works so well that Shane does it again for two and there’s the running ladder shot to the face for the same. We hit the double arm crank for a breather but Shawn is up with a DDT. Shane is fine enough to chair him in the face but Coast To Coast misses, with Shawn pulling Vince in the way of the trashcan.

There’s the flying forearm into the nipup and the comeback is on. The top rope elbow connects and Sweet Chin Music does the same, only to have Vince pull the referee out. Shawn goes after Vince but Shane gets in a low blow, setting up the Sharpshooter. Vince immediately calls for the bell to give Shane the win. JR: “Michaels has been castrated of his dignity!” JR never was one to let things feel small.

Rating: B-. They beat each other up well, but that big superplex spot was a weird thing to put in the first half of the match. It worked out well enough though and the anger continues to build in Shawn, to the point where he should be ready to annihilate Vince at Wrestlemania. It was a story building match, but it was entertaining at the same time.

Overall Rating: C. This was nothing but a big commercial for Wrestlemania and in that sense it worked out well enough. Nothing on here is overly bad and the show really did seem to fly by. It isn’t a show you need to see, but it also isn’t anything that you would regret watching. The energy was there and for a one off special to set up a big show, it was perfectly fine.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – March 13, 2006: The Balancing Act

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 13, 2006
Location: Ford Arena, Beaumont, Texas
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’re still on the way to Wrestlemania and John Cena vs. HHH is starting to look good. Other than that you have Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels in the big soap opera feud, which is setting up Saturday Night’s Main Event later this week. I’m not sure what else we are going to be getting on the way there but it could be a good one. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening recap.

Opening sequence.

Here are Vince and Shane McMahon to open things up, along with some security and what looks like a doctor. There is no way this can end well. They get inside and there is a black curtain waiting in the ring. Vince talks about how they both beat Shawn Michaels last week, but after the matches, Shawn was slurring his speech and could barely stand. Therefore, it is clear that SHAWN MICHAELS IS ON DRUGS!

Tonight, Shawn is going to take a public urination test. Shawn is ordered to come out here right now so here he comes in a hurry. Vince doesn’t like the pro-Shawn chants and wants to know why Shawn did what he did last week. Shane calls him a hypocrite and a disgusting junkie. Vince isn’t done and says that if Shawn tests positive, he forfeits both Saturday Night’s Main Event and Wrestlemania.

Shawn goes behind the curtain with the doctor as Vince cuts a PSA about not doing drugs. The doctor has the sample in the cup and Vince asks Shawn if he has anything to say. Shane thinks Shawn should just say no, but Shawn says it’s better to be p***** off than p***** on. Shawn throws the cup into the McMahon’s faces in a segment that would be copied almost verbatim in 2020. I know Vince loves this stuff but egads it can be grating to sit through.

Post break, Vince and Shane rapidly wash their faces and mouths, with Vince making Shawn vs. the Spirit Squad in a cage.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria

Trish is defending and Candice Michelle is at ringside. Victoria charges at her to start but gets Thesz pressed down for some right hands to the face. A kick to the head slows Trish down and the spinning side slam gives Victoria two. Victoria’s over the back choke has Trish in more trouble and she gets dumped outside. That doesn’t go anywhere and they’re back inside for a double clothesline. Trish is up with the handstand into the spinning headscissors but Candice breaks up Stratusfaction. The Widow’s Peak is loaded up but here’s Torrie Wilson for the save as Candice has the referee. The Chick Kick retains the title.

Rating: D+. Given that the Torrie vs. Candice feud is built on who looked better in Playboy, what are you expecting from a match with the two both getting involved? Trish vs. Victoria is one of the only good combinations they had for a long time but they did it so many times that it wasn’t exactly interesting again. Not the worst, but it was more about the people not in the match.

We get a movie trailer for Mick Foley, which is rated O for Overrated. It includes a bunch of clips of his Wrestlemania losses, plus some critics saying they can’t wait to see Foley lose to Edge.

Edge vs. Goldust

Cowboy Troy, the host of a country music competition show, joins commentary. Goldust starts with the hip attack as commentary completely ignores the match to plug the show and talk about country music. Edge hammers away but Goldust comes back with some right hands and the powerslam. Granted since the camera is on commentary, some of the impact is kind of lost. The right hands in the corner have Edge in trouble but a Lita distraction lets him hit the spear for the pin.

Rating: D. They really didn’t have another time to do the country music thing? This was just a way to get Edge on screen and run the trailers, but the focus was on the cowboy. Goldust wasn’t going to do anything here and I had forgotten he was even with the company at this point.

Post match Edge mocks Cowboy Troy and rolls his own trailer, promising to end Foley for good at Wrestlemania. Back in the arena, Edge says Foley will be his guest on a special hardcore edition of the Cutting Edge at Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Big Time Wrestlemania Moment: Roddy Piper vs. Morton Downey Jr.

Trish interrupts Maria’s chest workout (with the Bowflex Extreme) to ask if she has seen Torrie. Maria hasn’t, but Trish finds Torrie out cold with a Playboy on her chest.

Verne Gagne is going into the Hall of Fame.

It’s time for the John Cena/HHH contract signing, with Coach running things. Both guys come out and HHH throws his feet on the table. Before signing, HHH talks about Cena FUing Big Show last week. That should kill a normal man, but not John Cena. At Wrestlemania, that doesn’t mean anything because the match is a formality. The title is coming back home, and HHH signs his side. Cena signs as well without saying anything. HHH: “And just like that, it is over.”

Usually this is the time where HHH hits someone with a sledgehammer, so Cena says bring it on. HHH doesn’t need an advantage this time though, because Cena is already at a disadvantage. Cena laughs it off and threatens to violate HHH if he tries to use the sledgehammer. They both get up but here are Big Show and Kane to interrupt. HHH has the sledgehammer attached to the table but here are Chris Masters and Carlito to jump the monsters. Vince pops up to say not so fast and makes a six man tag main event.

Shawn Michaels vs. Spirit Squad

In a cage with Texas Tornado rules. Ignore commentary saying that it’s Shawn vs. the entire Spirit Squad when only four of the five are in there. The team gets smart by climbing in from different sides of the cage and Shawn can only fight them off for so long. They toss him into the air for a big crash and then into the cage but a big Poetry In Motion misses. Kenny misses the top rope legdrop and Shawn starts slugging away, including the top rope elbow to Mikey. Sweet Chin Music hits but here’s Shane to slam the door on Shawn’s head and put Kenny on top for the pin.

Rating: D. Another angle disguised as a match and that’s fine. They’re doing a nice job of making you want to see Shawn beat the fire out of both Vince and Shane (more the former than the latter) and that’s how you set up a match like this. There isn’t much else that can be done and they have gone with this for months now. Give us a good payoff and it will be fine.

Post match Shane sends Shawn into the cage and asks for it to be raised. Shawn is busted open and Shane hits the Van Terminator.

Trish says Torrie has a concussion and is out of Saturday Night’s Main Event. Mickie James comes in to offer her services as a replacement. After the match, they can go their separate ways. Trish agrees and Mickie has a creepy smile.

Video on Steve Austin, featuring the old Oh H*** Yeah song.

Vince is pleased with Shane and announces that Jim Ross is coming back to call the match. Shane threatens to bloody JR if he doesn’t call the match right.

Smackdown Rebound.

Intercontinental Title: Shelton Benjamin vs. Rob Van Dam

Shelton is defending and Ric Flair is on commentary. There is no Mama Benjamin though because she is having heart surgery, all because of Flair causing her to get even worse. Feeling out process to start with Rob driving him into the corner and hitting a running clothesline. A dropkick puts Shelton on the floor but he comes back in and runs the corner to superplex Rob back down.

We take a break and come back with Rob caught in an armbar as Flair talks about where he wants to be partying in Chicago after winning Money in the Bank. Shelton misses a dropkick and Rob starts striking away, setting up a running splash for two. The stepover kick puts Shelton on the apron and the top rope kick to the face makes it worse. Shelton grabs the title so Flair takes it away, only to be knocked outside by Rob. A rollup with a grab of the ropes retains the title.

Rating: C. The commercial and ending took away from what they had here but it was a nice job of pushing Money in the Bank, which hasn’t had the biggest build so far. Then again it’s not exactly a concept that needs a lot of setup. Flair doesn’t really fit into the idea of a ladder match but the match is set up in a way that he can be used in the right way.

Saturday Night’s Main Event rundown.

Carlito/Chris Masters/HHH vs. Big Show/Kane/John Cena

Show shoves Carlito into the corner to start and it’s off to Kane for a clothesline. The side slam drops Carlito again but it’s a rake to the eyes, allowing the double tag to Cena and HHH. The fans seem to like this but HHH hands it back to Carlito before doing anything. Cena drops him in a hurry and glares at HHH, allowing Masters to get in a cheap shot from behind.

Carlito comes back in to stomp away for two, followed by a lifting Downward Spiral for the same. Cena avoids a charge in the corner though and brings in Big Show to clean house. Everything breaks down and HHH is left alone with the monsters. The double chokeslam is loaded up but Carlito and Masters come in with chairs for the DQ.

Rating: C. Run of the mill main event tag match here and they’re doing a good job of making me want to see Cena vs. HHH. Cena wanting to fight and HHH hiding until Wrestlemania makes sense and that’s a nice way to set things up. Carlito/Masters vs. Big Show/Kane isn’t exactly the same thing but when have the Tag Team Titles been?

Post match the tag teams leave and Cena tells HHH to bring it. HHH teases getting in but Randy Orton runs in for the RKO to Cena to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This was kind of a weird one as they are less than three weeks away from Wrestlemania but at the same time they are building towards Saturday Night’s Main Event. They managed to make it work this time though and that’s a nice thing to see, even if the wrestling wasn’t great. Cena vs. HHH is going far better than I remember and it feels like a major match. Just get down to Wrestlemania though and things will feel a lot better.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Summerslam Count-Up – 2006 (2013 Redo): Questionably Stacked

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, John Bradshaw Layfield

The opening video is about DX taking over the company with their sophomoric jokes. The other matches get some lip service as well.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Chavo puts him on the top rope and tries to powerbomb Rey to the floor but Rey fights out to avoid death. They facejam each other down to the mat and both guys are in trouble. Back up and Rey gets two off a springboard cross body. A hard kick to the head gets the same for Rey before he hurricanranas Chavo into the 619. The seated senton misses and Mysterio hurricanranas both guys out to the floor.

ECW Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Sabu finally knocks him through the table off a springboard from the chair but Show pops up and electric chairs Sabu down. A Vader Bomb crushes Sabu and Show brings in two sets of steps. He bridges a table across them but his chokeslam is countered into a DDT through the table. Sabu sets up another table but charges into a chokeslam through it for the pin.

Layla won the Diva Search earlier this week.

We recap Hogan vs. Orton. Hogan is a legend, Orton is the legend killer, I think you can do the math. There was a stupid bit with Orton hitting on Brooke thrown in which went nowhere.

Randy Orton vs. Hulk Hogan

We look at a big party yesterday which is exactly what you would think it was. This was also the announcement for WWE 24/7, which was nowhere near as cool as it sounded.

Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. King Booker

Post match Batista “destroys” Booker, which translates to him not being able to get him up for a Batista Bomb until Booker clearly pulls himself up. Again, this feud went on for three more months.

Jeff Hardy is coming back tomorrow. Why bother announcing it when you can have a big surprise like that?

D-Generation X vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Vince and Shane head back to the entrance and send out the Spirit Squad as the first line of defense. Superkicks, backdrops and Pedigrees abound, getting rid of the Raw Tag Champions (the cheerleaders) in less than fifteen seconds. DX beat the Spirit Squad about five times in this whole thing but never won the tag titles. I never quite got why.

Wrestlemania 23 is in Detroit.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Edge

We hit the chinlock for a good while until Cena breaks the hold with pure power. Cena hits a knee to the chest but walks into a big boot for two. Edge goes up top and fights off Cena so he can hit a top rope clothesline for two. Off to a camel clutch but Cena again powers out of it. Both guys are down so Lita sends in a chair. Edge picks it up before throwing it down out of fear in a cute bit. Cena initiates his finishing sequence but the FU is countered into the Impaler for two.

Edge goes up again but has to escape the FU off the ropes into an electric chair but Cena gets two off a victory roll. A middle rope cross body is rolled through into the FU but a Lita distraction makes Cena drop Edge. The champion is sent into his chick and Cena gets a close two off a rollup. A double clothesline puts both guys down until Edge rolls over for two.

Ratings Comparison

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Big Show vs. Sabu

Original: C

Redo: D

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: D

Mick Foley vs. Ric Flair

Original: B-

Redo: B

Batista vs. King Booker

Original: D

Redo: D

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. D-Generation X

Original: C-

Redo: B-

Edge vs. John Cena

Original: C+

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C

Other than Hogan, not a lot changes here. This show pretty much is what it is.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/09/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2006-hogan-and-dx-are-in-charge-are-we-in-1998/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Summerslam Count-Up – 2006 (Original): The Odd Ball

IMG Credit: WWE

Summerslam 2006
Date: August 20, 2006
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 16,168
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Joey Styles, JBL

So a few things have happened since last year, but a lot of the show is the same. DX is back, feuding with the McMahons, Edge has risen to prominence and is the WWE Champion, and Booker is now a British guy. Your main events are Booker vs. Batista and Cena vs. Edge, along with the DX vs. McMahon tag match. The other major difference is the return of ECW, which as usual has one match. This is far different than the ECW you see today, as the title match is Big Show vs. Sabu.

Hogan is here again, this time against Orton, while Flair and Foley are having an I Quit match, which would be Foley’s last big angle as he would leave for awhile very shortly after this, returning in about 9 months for a few appearances here and there before becoming commentator for about a month before leaving for TNA. That’s enough recap from me, so let’s do this. Oh one last thing. Angle would be released 5 days after this show and would debut for TNA about 5 weeks after this.

The opening video is generic to say the least. It’s just promos and clips from the three major feuds. I’m really disappointed in this.

The 6 announcers welcome us to the show which takes a few minutes. Lawler says that he’s the WWE’s original party animal which just amuses me.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Remember how I said I was disappointed? That’s nothing compared to this. This contest is being held because these two have been fighting over who was closer to Eddie. This is nothing short of disgusting to me. Eddie passed away less than a year ago, and this isn’t even the first angle that was because of him. I get that he was a huge star, but you don’t need to use him to further storylines.

Chavo says that Rey is living off of Eddie’s legacy, which in reality he likely was as he got the world title at Mania, but that’s a different argument for a different time. They show video packages of both men’s relationships with Eddie as I feel like I’m in 5th grade. Seriously, this is like two 8 year old girls arguing over who someone’s real best friend is. However, the other friend just happens to be dead. See? No matter how you say that it’s not respectful or paying tribute. IT’S CREEPY.

Also, the whole Dominick storyline is completely omitted. In other words, thanks to the magic of WWE, the whole angle about Eddie trying to destroy Rey’s family and steal his son has been completely forgiven. And people wonder why WWE is criticized so much. Apparently Chavo is retired or something but this is a one night only event. If only that were true. As much as I can’t stand JBL in the ring, he’s pretty good on commentary.

It’s nice to have him out there as he was a wrestler far more recently than Tazz was. Chavo cost Rey the title. Thanks for mentioning that 3 minutes into the match. JBL makes an Arturo Gatti reference which is just weird to hear at this point. Chavo is complaining that Rey is trying to make a name off of Eddie. Yeah, I don’t need to criticize that. JBL calls Chavo’s comeback the biggest one since the resurrection. Again, don’t even need to make fun of that.

JBL goes on to say that these are two of Smackdown’s best. If this is one night only, wouldn’t that mean he’s not on Smackdown at the moment? Rey is having mask issues so we take a short break. Ok I like JBL. He’s actually really good at this. They both stand on the top rope and…just kind of jump off. Yeah that spot looked really stupid. Bradshaw keeps calling him Shavo which is getting annoying.

Yeah JBL is already getting annoying. If he says “He’s a Guerrero!” one more time I’m going to scream. Eddie was a groomsman at JBL’s wedding? How much do they want to break down the walls between reality and kayfabe? 619 but Chavo avoids the senton and they go to the floor. Vickie, now with about another 50 pounds on her and in full annoying mode heads to the ring and goes after Chavo for no apparent reason, slapping him.

The three amigos get Chavo booed out of the building. Cole calls a hurricanrana a headscisscors. Since Chavo got booed out of the building for the triple suplexes, Rey does them as well as everyone is being booed now. Rey goes up for a frog splash and Vickie tries to stop him, resulting him in him getting crotched. Chavo hits a suplex which is called a brainbuster, leading to the frog splash as Vickie screams to win it. Post match, they still won’t shut up about how it’s about family etc.

Rating: C+. The match was fine, but the rating is hurt a lot as this storyline is just flat out horrid. It’s completely disrespectful, and while it got both of the Guerreros jobs, it just wasn’t needed. There were about a dozen other ways to do this that wouldn’t be disrespectful at all, nor would they have ticked off the crowd. I hated this, but the wrestling was ok I guess. It would have been better if I had watched it muted.

Booker and Sharmell are in the back with Booker still being British, which is oddly a far better gimmick for him. He was completely generic as Booker T, but this is quite memorable. Edge and Lita come in and they argue about who the most powerful couple in wrestling is. That would be Vince and Linda.

This would lead to the triple threat challenge at Cyber Sunday which was all three championships on the line at the same time and was ended by Kevin freaking Federline. They make a bet about their title matches that didn’t mean anything at all in the end.

Ad for the best managers DVD. That’s a lost art in wrestling anymore.

It’s time for the ECW title match. The story is pretty simple: Big Show is ECW Champion and Sabu wants to be. Sabu won a ladder match against Van Dam on ECW to get this match, albeit with help from Show. Styles screams that this was VINTAGE ECW. Is this a running joke that we just never caught on to?

ECW Title: Sabu vs. Big Show

This is extreme rules, and for the ECW WORLD Title. Yes it was called a world title back then. For those of you that haven’t seen Sabu before, consider yourself lucky. He’s the epitome of everything that’s wrong with hardcore wrestling as his skills were limited at best and dangerous at worst. However, he was an extreme icon, so it’s all good. The ECW belt looks like a toy on Show. Within 5 seconds of the bell, Sabu has hit Show 4 times with a chair. That’s a good way of foreshadowing the match.

Show steps on it and crushes the chair which looks cool. This is more or less just Sabu using weapons and Show beating him up. It’s a simple formula but it’s working to an extent. The chair shots sounds SICK. If you think Hardy botches moves, he’s Bret Hart compared to Sabu. It’s table time, as Sabu is the guy that made them famous, far more so than the Dudleys who are more known for them.

Sabu gets him through the table which the more I think about it the more I think that it is nowhere near as great of a spot as it’s built up to be. A Vader Bomb pretty much kills the Arabian. Big Show brings in a table and stairs which is a cheap indy show name if I’ve ever heard one. Show sets up a tiny bridge with a table over two sets of stairs.

Sabu climbs on it and of course it falls over, so he sets it again as Show just looks at him. Naturally, he’s booed for it. Chokeslam through the table ends this, even though Sabu is on the table and therefore his shoulders are technically up, but why am I trying to use logic on a match like this?

Rating: C. It was a hardcore match with good chair shots. What are you really expecting here? It was fine for what it was, but it’s nothing special. Sabu as usual was just flat out horrid and Show didn’t have to do much. It was ok, as long as you don’t take it too seriously.

We see Layla winning the Diva Search. Yeah I don’t care either. In the divas locker room, Layla shows off her horrible acting skills while Trish yells at her for saying she doesn’t belong here. Truer words have never been spoken. Three years have passed and Layla still can’t do crap. Of course, in the end Trish is fine with it and everything is cool. They take her into the shower and spray her down with water. Yeah, it’s stupider than it sounds.

A band called the Teddybears did the theme song. Is there a point to these things that I’m missing?

We get a recap of Hogan vs. Orton, which is billed perfectly as legend vs. legend killer. These Hogan highlight packages are always cool. More or less all this happened for was to get Hogan’s reality show pushed and to promote Brooke. Orton hit on her and Hogan stopped him, resulting in Hogan getting RKOed on a car.

We also get highlights of all the legends that Orton hit with the RKO, which is a decent list I guess. We even got a parody complete with impersonators. More or less, this is Orton replacing Shawn, but lower on the card, as it should be.

Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Orton

Wow Hogan goes on third? That’s very surprising. Unless I’m overlooking something, this is Hogan’s last match to date in WWE. He appeared once other than this at the 15th anniversary where he fought off Khali, but other than that he’s been gone. You know it’s a good thing Vince is rich. He has to pay a lot of money for roofs. Hogan of course gets the legendary pop that he deserves. Ross of course mentions that Hogan has a bad knee. Hulk Hogan doesn’t get hurt you idiot.

Hogan definitely is looking smaller here, but he’s still muscular. The reaction for Hogan really is awesome. I love the old school merchandise like the towel and shirts. The entrance goes on forever just like the old school ones did. This is always fun and this is no exception. This is a much better reaction than he got last year and I think it’s because they got the formula right: Hogan vs. evil. That was the problem with Shawn.

He was still a face so why would we want to see Hogan beat him up? The fans didn’t buy it so while it worked, it wasn’t great. It’s weird seeing someone being taller than Orton. In a head scratcher, Hogan gets put in a headlock and goes down to one knee in just a few seconds. Everyone goes a bit blind as the headband goes off. They use an overhand wristlock and it looks decent. I’m quite surprised. Other than shoving Orton at the beginning, it’s been all Orton.

Dang it why is it that every time I say that the comeback begins? Hogan gets on the second rope and punches him, which for some reason surprises JR. It’s not like this is a new thing for him. He hits a clothesline with authority, which is another term that’s never made sense. How can a clothesline have authority? Can it give you an infraction while you try to start a resistance? The bias for Hogan and his rule breaking will never cease to amuse me.

In a weird time, they mention that the fans from the old AWA days remember the times when he refused to obey the rules. Why not just go with the time he was a heel in the far more famous WCW? Maybe there’s something to that theory of WWE never mentioning WCW because they know it’s better. Orton finally goes for the knee which is what makes sense all along, as given away by the massive knee braces on both legs.

They finally mention that Hogan was the main event of Summerslam 90, which I’ve long since theorized. Apparently Orton is craving to be loved. Thank you Sigmund Ross. Orton slides under the big boot just like Shawn did last year and hits the picture perfect dropkick. Screw Bob Holly. Orton’s dropkick is perfect. Now here we have something that makes me change my mind about a lot of the criticisms that Hogan gets.

Randy hits the RKO and covers, and Hogan doesn’t kick out. He puts his foot on the rope. That’s very subtle but when you think about it, that’s a huge show of respect to Orton. Of all of the big finishers that Hogan has been hit with over the years, I’ve never seen him not kick out of it with that big power move. He didn’t power out of the RKO. He had to use the weaker kickout. That’s a huge show of support for the young kid and it makes him look dominant.

The thing is they never mentioned it as a big deal, despite it being one of the biggest rubs that Hogan has ever given anyone. Anyway, Orton celebrates because he thinks that he’s beaten the legend himself and maybe he has a right to, but Hogan’s foot didn’t go unnoticed by the referee despite the announcers being completely oblivious to it.

Hogan staggers to his feet and limps around in a circle shaking his head which is a truly sad sight to see in my eyes as he just doesn’t have the physical strength anymore to do it the way he used to. We all know how this is going to go. Hogan circles Orton, shakes a finger in his face, kicks him in the head and after about 15 seconds, drops the leg for the pin.

I love how nonchalant Hogan is after the legdrop, as if to say yeah I know he’s not getting up for a month. Lawler marks out like an 8 year old for this and I love that. If this were anyone else I’d hate it but in this case it’s fine as this is Hulk Hogan. He’s the greatest ever and he should be treated as such. As Hogan celebrates we see a guy with a tattoo of Hogan all over his entire back. That’s either creepy or awesome.

Rating: B. This is exactly what a modern Hogan match is supposed to be. You have a young guy that is kind of proven but not quite and he just can’t beat Hogan despite getting close. Now some of you again might say that Hogan didn’t give Randy the rub here, but on a closer look he did.

That lack of a kickout of the RKO was in reality was huge. It made Orton look like a monster because it was enough to stop the super kickout from Hogan, which no other move has ever done in history. That’s about as big of a rub as you could give.

We see a big party that was held yesterday announcing the debut of 24/7. Kennedy is there, which amuses me.

Foley is in the back and Melina comes up and hugs him. Now this was a very interesting storyline that I wish had been given more time to develop. Flair had run down Foley in his book and Foley did the same. There was a real life feud between these two but they’ve since patched things up. Melina was a real life friend of Foley who was stuck in the middle of this for some reason. They had agreed to an I Quit match here after having a pretty bad one at Vengeance.

Ric Flair vs. Mick Foley

Sweet goodness Lillian is amazing looking. Foley brings in some weapons with him. It’s weird seeing Foley more or less as the heel and Flair as the face. There is legit animosity between these two which always helps things get better. Foley jumps him and it’s on. Running knee to the face in the first ten seconds from Foley. And then he does it again with the garbage can.

Mandible Claw goes on and Flair is down. This is more or less a squash almost but Foley grabs the mic and says make it easy on yourself and say it’s over. Naturally it’s not over and Foley gets barbed wire. On his alternate commentary from his DVD, Foley says he felt he didn’t have aggression here and he felt bad about it. Flair wraps barbed wire around his hand and CHOPS FOLEY. This left a HUGE scar on his chest that he shows on the DVD and it’s awful looking.

Barbed wire board is rammed into the face of Flair and he slides under the ring to blade I think. Oh yeah he’s busted open. The fans want tables. Something I’d like to do here is time how long between that chant starting and the amount of time before they’re introduced. Teasing them like that is a great idea as we have to wait for awhile instead of instant gratification.

Barbed wire board dropped on Flair results in him shouting obscenities to Foley. Foley busts out the tacks as there hasn’t been much of anything from Flair here. Flair is slammed onto the tacks for the second time in about two weeks after Show did it to him on ECW recently. Dang there are a ton of tacks in Flair’s arms.

Time for the barbed wire bat here. Flair is bleeding like crazy at this point. And now Flair sends him into the post and beats his arm with the bat. Foley is apparently wearing a Japanese Cactus Jack t-shirt. BIG bump as Foley is on the apron and Flair gets a running start with the bat and sends Foley to the floor and he bangs his head on the concrete. Cue Melina down to the ring to check on Foley who is out and the referee stops it.

Ok never mind as Flair decides that’s not enough so we’re going to keep going. Flair says he didn’t say I Quit so we keep going. He beats on Foley even more until Melina throws the towel in for him and says he quits. Foley still didn’t say I Quit so I don’t get why Flair would accept that either. Oh ok he didn’t. Foley quits seconds later I think after Flair threatens to hit Melina.

Rating: B-. On Foley’s DVD he does commentary for this match and he says that it wasn’t a very good match despite having a massive scar on his chest from the barb wire spot. He said that he never really took this as far as he could have to make it a truly bloody classic, but he thought it was ok. I would have to disagree with him to an extent though as it was at least decent.

Having Melina play into the equation at the end was a great move, despite her turning on Foley and having him fired less than a week later. I also really like the false ending as it makes you wonder how far they’re going to take this one.

Vince and Shane are in the back with Estrada. They more or less say that Umaga will be backing them up tonight. JBL gets in one of the best secretive lines you’ll ever hear as he calls him Armando Ali Baba Estrada. Back in OVW, Estrada played an Iranian character named Osama. That’s a very nice little inside joke.

Smackdown World Title: Booker T vs. Batista

There’s no buildup here other than Booker is champion and Batista never actually lost the title but had to drop it due to injury. Booker’s wife just does nothing but shout “All hail King Booker!” over and over. JBL’s sucking up is quite humorous. She’s at 11 times already. After 15 of them, we finally get Booker’s entrance. Isn’t that in essence a jobber entrance? He’s already in the ring when his announcement is made. Yep, Booker gets no respect.

Batista gets a solid pop but nothing mind blowing. This was one of three consecutive Smackdown PPV main events involving these two, so you really don’t have to think that hard about why there were jokes about how repetitive these shows were. If I remember right these two had a legit fight backstage at some point and Booker beat up Batista with relative ease.

They botch a spinkick spot but I’m not sure who is to blame. Booker throws the kick but Batista wasn’t there so they had to have him keep spinning. It didn’t look that good. We get a loud and long boring chant as the first 2-3 minutes of this is primarily Booker having Batista in a chinlock. Batista is quite rusty here which is certainly playing a role here. Booker hits him with the scepter on the floor, which means Batista is moving even slower than he was before and that’s saying a lot.

Back in to an arm hold, which is the same thing as a chinlock in essence. The crowd chants she’s got herpes at Sharmell. This is just amusing. Booker gets crotched by missing a kick, so Batista, ever the strategist and in ring general, picks him up and drops him the same way over another rope. What’s the point of that? Couldn’t he do something more original than that?

Booker hits a missile dropkick which used to be his finishing move in WCW, yet here is just a run of the mill move and the same thing happens with the Book End. JBL makes a bowling analogy which makes me shake my head. Batista hits a jackhammer which Booker pops up from. I love how neither of these guys have an original move to save their life.

Batista hits a bad full nelson slam to set up the power bomb. Sharmell runs in and slaps Batista for the DQ. Yes that’s actually the finish they went with. Post match Batista beats up Booker and BADLY botches the Batista Bomb. He barely got him up and it looked like he was trying to use it on Khali.

Rating: D. For the second year in a row Batista has the worst match of the night. It was barely over 10 minutes long, it was about 4 and a half minutes of rest holds, and the finish was completely stupid. Batista botches so much out there that it was just horrid. If you want to know where the stigma of Batista sucks comes from, I present to you Exhibit A. This was just flat out awful all around and felt like it belonged on Smackdown.

Jeff Hardy is coming to Raw.

DX is talking to someone who we can’t see and they tell him that Vince said Umaga is the biggest monster in the company.

Recap of DX vs. the McMahons and the feud that Satan is afraid of. This feud went on ALL summer and produced only a handful of decently funny moments. It was way too long and was stupid, primarily as it was DX vs. the Spirit Squad, who were tag champions at the time.

Despite beating them about 5 times, DX never won the tag titles. Why that’s the case is beyond me. It might be because they couldn’t have two major stars as champions. That couldn’t happen. We need our male cheerleaders blast it!

Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon vs. DX

In case you’ve forgotten it, Shawn made his Summerslam debut in a 6 man tag in 1989. Just thought I’d remind you because JR has only said it at the last three Summerslams. We get the traditionally way too long DX intro. Good night Lillian looks great. HHH says that we need to get ready to suck it. Shawn says if you’re not down with that, they’re going to tell you to suck it. Well I’m glad we’ve got so many choices to pick from.

To say JR doesn’t like Vince is an understatement. Apparently one day Vince will run a hostile takeover of the afterlife. Spirit Squad runs out and uses their trampoline to come in. Two backdrops, a toss over the ropes, Sweet Chin Music and a Pedigree later they’re gone and HHH has a new sweatband. Finlay, Regal and Kennedy run out to beat on DX. The McMahons haven’t even left the stage yet in case you were wondering.

While the club from Finlay would usually drop Khali, since it’s used on DX, it has little effect at all. Big Show is here now and as they try to fight him, we finally have some logic as the other EIGHT GUYS that DX beat up finally wake up and help out, so it’s 9 on 2 here with the McMahons still to come. See, this is the first time ever that I can recall where Vince finally had a brain and realized he owned an army of guys to beat up whomever he was feuding with at the time.

He’d always send one at a time. You own the company Vince. Send out 10 guys at once or something to beat the other dude up. See how effective it can be? I really feel sorry for Styles and Tazz as they’ve been sitting there all night doing nothing after calling a single match. That’s just stupid. Why not have them sit up near the entrance so they can at least go sit in the back after their match? HHH goes through the ECW table as Vince and Shane finally are in the ring.

JR is really getting annoying with this running Vince down. We finally have a bell. It’s Vince against Shawn to start. Ross calls the heels the money maniacs. That’s like the main event of Summerslam 88 from my nightmares. HHH is still on the floor from the chokeslam through the table. HHH tries to get up but Shane hits a baseball slide to knock him onto JR and King. Ross flips HHH over as he’s ticked off about being covered by a big sweaty man.

The way it looked was just quite funny. Demolition Decapitator or whatever that move was called lands on Shawn. The McMahons hit a Hart Attack which is just appropriate being used on HBK. This is followed up by a Doomsday Device. This is actually kind of cool. Of course HBK kicks out though and this isn’t even surprising to the announcers. You have to love the power of kayfabe don’t you? Shawn finally gets a tag and HHH looks perfectly fresh.

Even Hulk Hogan thinks a comeback like this is stupid. JR says it’s adrenaline. I say it’s nonsense. As if 9 run ins weren’t enough, we make it a perfect ten as Umaga comes out. Oh wait it’s 11 since Estrada is with him. We now have 15 people in this match, not counting the referee and 4 announcers, all of which have been involved in this match. Counting Lillian, that’s 21 people that have been at ringside that we know the names of and have been involved in this match somehow.

Anyone else think that’s a lot? It turns out that the person DX was talking to was Kane who chases Umaga off to start their feud which, shockingly enough, Kane jobbed in. Shane sets up for Coast to Coast but Shawn…knees him in the leg I guess, to stop it. Of course it’s called Sweet Chin Music. It’s probably good that he did that as Shane would have been about a foot short. Vince takes both finishers to end this mess.

The recaps and celebration goes on for about two and a half minutes just to make sure we know that this was really a huge win for our triumphant heroes. Somewhere around JR’s 8th sports analogy for how amazing DX’s win is, the faces are finally about to leave the arena. Oh wait, we have MORE replays for you. To begin with, they set for their double pose but I think Shawn’s elbow is hurt as he can’t do the double bicep. He was holding it earlier after going ove the top rope with Shane.

They do a very good job of changing the camera angle for the Shane kick as it’s from behind Shawn now and therefore looks like he actually got the kick. That’s very smart and well done so points for that. Some big fat guy comes out about a foot and Shawn sort of acknowledges him, which I’d assume is someone saying to wrap this up as it’s over. I don’t think he was supposed to be on camera.

Rating: C-. This was a very hard one to grade as it’s just a mess. With more than ten people running in that aren’t involved in the match at all, it’s a hard one to grade. However, I’ll give them credit for FINALLY getting the idea behind Vince as the evil owner right. However, at the end of the day, there was too much going on here for it to be taken seriously. The flaw with this feud is simple: DX are former world champions, and Vince and Shane are businessmen.

There’s no reason to believe that the McMahons would have a chance at all here. Granted they got the theory correct by adding in a lot of people that know what they’re doing to make the feud more interesting. It was better than I’m making it sound, but it wasn’t great.

Kane actually helped out a lot here as he took away some of the ridiculous odds for DX. JR needs to shut up though, as for about 20 minutes he did nothing but talk about how great DX was and how evil the McMahons were. It’s one thing to mention it a few times, but he must have cracked the 20s in times he complained about it. It was completely annoying and WAY overdone.

Wrestlemania 23 is in Detroit.

Time for the final recap of the night as we look at Cena vs. Edge. They tried as hard as they could to make this an epic feud and they got as close as possible without actually getting there. Edge won MITB in 2005 and shocked the world by stealing the title in January after an Elimination Chamber win by Cena. I remember watching that match and texting a former friend of mine that was a diehard Cena mark. I told her the next day that Cena lost the title to Edge and she almost fell over.

The reaction was great. Cena got the title back soon enough but Edge won it from RVD on Raw in July. Edge beat up Cena’s father 6 days prior to this, and Cena is the hometown boy here. We cut to the theme song of the show to get more clips from this feud, including the live sex celebration that as I’ve said a dozen times, was nothing special. It truly wasn’t. It was them moving around under a blanket and nothing more. Big freaking deal.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Apparently if Edge gets disqualified he loses the title. Cena gets a VERY mixed reaction. The main selling point here is Cena’s father, which makes a lot of sense actually. Lita needs to freaking cut her bangs. You have a hot face. Show it off. She’s Women’s Champion here which was her final reign I believe. Correction it’s her next to last reign as she would lose to Trish next month in Toronto so Trish could retire as champion.

Lita was gone in November, leaving the whole division completely destroyed, the issues of which are still being felt to this day. This is more or less standard stuff with Edge getting close to a bunch of count out wins. On one of these, Edge knocks Cena to the floor and Cena’s eyes are just hilarious. They’re bugged out all over the place as he looks like he just remembered that Christmas is tomorrow or some other cliché from a bad movie.

For some reason I have My Immortal by Evanescence stuck in my head. As you can tell, this match isn’t holding my attention that well. Fans are solidly behind Edge it would seem. You have to love that in Cena’s hometown he’s still not popular. This was the era that Cena was beginning to be truly despised by a lot of fans in, as he was just constantly shoved down our throats, and it would only get worse as the year long title reign was coming.

However, I think those criticisms are unfair for one simple reason: who else was the title going to go on? HHH would be injured in just a few months, HBK lost to Cena at Mania before feuding with Orton and would leave for knee surgery (which had to be legit. It’s an HBK knee injury after all), and Cena was feuding with Edge right here. In short, who was there left to put the belt on, Umaga? See what I mean? There were no other choices other than for Cena to hold the title.

We get a Cena chant that is a lot stronger than I think it actually was if that makes sense. Cena starts his huge comeback of all his standard stuff, complete with an STFU. Lita sets up with the belt to hit Cena but Edge says no as it would cost him the title. She slips him some brass knucks after he makes the ropes though. FU is countered and Edge nails him in the back of the head with the brass which sounds awesome to end it and the show.

Rating: C+. This was fine, but just fine. It’s nothing epic at all despite what the announcers would like you to believe. There really wasn’t a solid main event this year and it showed bad. This would probably be the best choice for it though, as there’s not a lot that would have topped this.

Either way, the match was just ok, but it felt like the title should have changed here. It would change the next month in Toronto as Cena was booed out of the building, so why wait? Why not have Cena get the big win here in his own hometown? Either way, this was ok but nothing great.

Overall Rating: C+. This show is the epitome of slightly above average. Everything on it is just ok. There isn’t a big moment or a big match that makes it jump off the page at you, as Flair and Foley or Cena/Edge is probably the match of the night by pure default. It’s an ok show and watchable, but it’s nothing great at all.

DX vs. McMahons was ok, but just ok. That’s the only thing I can think of to describe any of the matches on here: ok, but just ok. It’s nothing special at all and because of that, it’s right in the middle of recommended and not recommended. Some might like it but others will be bored out of their minds.




Monday Night Raw – March 6, 2006: That’s Not Important Right Now

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 6, 2006
Location: Birmingham Jefferson Convention Complex, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

We have less than a month to go before Wrestlemania and that means we need to get in some more build between HHH and John Cena. That being said, the bigger story going on is Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels, which is likely to get a lot more time tonight. That and maybe some more Money in the Bank setup. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Marty Jannetty trying to get a job last week, leading to Shawn Michaels having to save him from Chris Masters. Shane McMahon got involved as well and forced Shawn into Vince McMahon’s Club instead.

Here are Vince and Shane, flanked by a bunch of security, to open things up. With the camera pointed at the ramp for a weird visual, Vince talks about the Oscars last night and seeing three hours of a** kissing. That was weird to see, but it was nothing close to what we saw last week. Of course we have visuals on the screen, but Vince has some people to thank, complete with music playing behind him.

He thanks the Spirit Squad and Chris Masters, the latter of whom was so helpful that he and Carlito are now receiving a Tag Team Title shot at Wrestlemania. Then there is Marty Jannetty, who will not be here tonight and will never be in the ring again. The fans deserve some thanks as well because they are willing do do anything to keep their jobs. Finally there is Shane, who humiliated Shawn, which is why Vince loves him so much.

That brings us to Wrestlemania, where Shawn is facing a 60 year old man on the cover of Muscle and Fitness magazine. Shawn’s music hits so security runs to the floor, because they’re really stupid. Shawn runs in through the crowd and jumps Vince until security pulls him off. Vince and Shane escape, with Vince saying Shawn faces Shane at Saturday Night’s Main Event in a street fight. Tonight though, Shawn is facing…..Shane!

Post break Shane doesn’t get it but Vince says he is going to ruin Shawn’s life.

Intercontinental Title: Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin

Shelton is defending and has Mama Benjamin in his corner. Flair goes after him to start but walks into an early Samoan drop for two. A delayed suplex gets the same but Flair slugs his way out of the corner. Shelton even reaches out for his Mama as Flair keeps hammering away. It’s too much for Shelton so he pokes the referee in the eye. Flair grabs the Figure Four to make Shelton tap but the referee calls for the DQ instead.

Post match Flair is livid and beats Shelton up with Mama’s oxygen tank.

During the break, Teddy Long announced that Money in the Bank was now inter-promotional, with qualifying matches continuing this week on Smackdown. Rob Van Dam was there too. Yeah it’s quite the unnecessary cameo.

HHH vs. Kane

Wrestlemania XV rematch. HHH circles around a bit to start and gets in a poke to the eye, earning himself a beating in the corner. Kane goes up top but gets crotched back down, leaving HHH to not be able to hit a suplex. It’s too early for the Pedigree as Kane backdrops his way to freedom and hits a delayed side slam. Now the top rope clothesline connects but Chris Masters runs in for the distraction. HHH clotheslines Kane outside so Kane grabs his feet and HHH grabs the referee. That’s enough for Carlito to run out and spit apple in Kane’s face and post him, setting up the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: D+. You wouldn’t usually expect a match in 2006 to be about as overbooked as the original version booked by Vince Russo. At least there was nothing that left you scratching your head this time and the Tag Team Champions finally have someone to face for the titles. HHH getting a win on the road to Wrestlemania helps, even if it took a distracted referee and two people interfering.

Victoria and Torrie Wilson are ready to unveil Candice Michelle’s Playboy cover. Torrie is upset over Candice being mad at her but Victoria says Torrie messed up and Candice is under a lot of pressure. Torrie implies Candice might be disrobed in the ring tonight.

Stephanie McMahon comes in to see Shawn and tries to apologize for Vince and Shane, plus everything she has ever done. She goes to leave but has some pregnancy issues. Shawn goes to get her a water and Stephanie spikes his water.

Video on Candice Michelle’s Playboy shoot.

Victoria and Torrie are in the ring and unveil the Playboy cover. The cover rises up and Candice herself is inside for the Go Daddy dance. She says she is hotter than Trish Stratus and Stacy Keibler (Candice: “Congratulations on finishing third by the way Stace.”) and has the hottest Playboy cover of all time. Right Torrie? That’s a little too far for Torrie but Candice keeps pushing until Torrie calls her a b****. Candice backs off and they hug, with Candice winking at Victoria, who jumps Torrie from behind. Victoria and Candice even have a quick kiss as they leave.

Shawn isn’t feeling right but drinks more water.

Shawn Michaels vs. Shane McMahon

Vince McMahon is here too. Shawn charges in and slugs away with the chase being on. Shane gets in a cheap shot though and Shawn looks a little shaky. Some right hands in the corner have Shawn in more trouble but he comes back with a right hand. He can’t follow up though and the chops have little effect. There’s the nip up but Shawn can’t get all the way to his feet. Shane punches him down again and here are the doctors but Vince won’t let them come to the ring. Shane dances around as Shawn can’t even stand up. Shawn finally collapses and Shane gets the easy pin.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t the point of course, but the McMahons really need to work on their poisoning skills as Stephanie did the whole thing on worldwide TV. The point here was the angle advancement as we continue to get ready for Shawn to destroy Vince once and for….well probably at least a day or so.

Post match Shane tells Lilian Garcia that Shawn has another match right now.

Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels

Vince covers him for the pin in about five seconds.

Post match the McMahons do the big celebration until the Spirit Squad comes out and puts the McMahons on their shoulders.

Eugene vs. Kenny

Hold on though as we need a quick dance off and then a game of hide the air horn. Kenny uses the distraction to get in a cheap shot and the beating is on in a hurry. A jumping elbow to the face and another to the chest give Kenny two and we hit the chinlock. Kenny hits a basement dropkick for two and we’re back to the chinlock. Some forearms to the head get two more and the chinlock goes on again.

That doesn’t last long though and Eugene is sent into the buckle, meaning it’s time to get fired up. The airplane spin into a bulldog gives Eugene two and a bridging O’Connor roll is good for the same. Eugene hits a Rock Bottom but a distraction lets Johnny come in for a kick to the head. Kenny adds the top rope legdrop for the pin.

Rating: D+. You do need to have the Spirit Squad get in the ring at some point as they are just glorified background characters otherwise. That being said, it is rather amazing to see that they have turned so many OVW stars, including Eugene, into this stuff. It is good to have them on the show and that is the point for all of them, but how long were they expecting these characters to last?

Video on Saturday Night’s Main Event.

Lita vs. Maria

Lita is out for revenge from a few weeks back when Lita pinned her in a mixed tag. Edge is here too and Maria is looking a little nervous. A clothesline and some knees have Maria in early trouble and Edge mocks her from ringside. We stop for a quick kiss from Edge, allowing Maria to grab a rollup for two. The cockiness continues with Lita talking trash but the fans are right there with the Jim Duggan catchphrases. Lita finally plants her with the DDT for the pin.

Rating: D. Another match built around the story more than anything else and that’s fine. They made it very clear that Lita is a Women’s Champion and Maria is there because of the Diva Search. It didn’t make for the most exciting match but it was what they should have done here from a logic perspective.

Post match Edge loads up the spear on Maria but Mick Foley comes in for the save. Lita offers a distraction though and Edge spears Foley. The Conchairto follows and Edge accepts the challenge for Wrestlemania.

Sherri Martel is going into the Hall of Fame. That’s a good choice.

Mickie James is very happy with Sherri being inducted when Trish Stratus comes up. Trish says they need to talk and finally cuts Mickie off, saying she’s going too far and they need to be apart. Trish leaves and Mickie is devastated.

Saturday Night’s Main Event rundown.

Big Show vs. John Cena

Non-title Wrestlemania XX rematch. Show shoves him down to start and Cena isn’t sure what to do here. The big shots knock Cena into the corner and there’s a beal back out of it. Cena gets slammed as Show stays on his back and a side slam cuts him off for two. We hit the required bearhug but Cena fights out and low bridges Show to the floor. Cue HHH with the sledgehammer and we take a break.

Back with Cena hitting a delayed vertical suplex for two with Cena getting his foot on the ropes. Another slam gets another two but Cena gets the boots up in the corner. A middle rope crossbody is pulled out of the air though and Cena is down again. Cue Carlito and Masters but Kane jumps them from behind.

That lets Cena catch Show on the middle rope with a suplex (with the camera cutting to a shot of HHH, though they show the full thing on the replay). Cena stares at HHH though and gets shouldered down, only to counter the chokeslam into a DDT. Another chokeslam attempt is escaped and it’s the FU for the pin, much to HHH’s shock.

Rating: C. This was another match where it was all about the angle advancement with HHH vs. Cena and there’s nothing wrong with that. They took a step here with HHH realizing he might be up against something special with Cena and that could bring out the bigger, more evil HHH. Granted that might not be the best thing in the world, but at least they have a reason for going there.

The big staredown ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. We are firmly to the point where the wrestling does not matter and that was the case right here. The wrestling was mostly bad tonight but that is far from important whatsoever at the moment. They advanced some stories here and that is one of the best things that they can do with less than four weeks to go before Wrestlemania.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – February 27, 2006: They’re On The Right Road

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 27, 2006
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles

We’re just over a month away from Wrestlemania and the show is starting to take some shape. The big story coming out of last week is HHH becoming the new #1 contender to John Cena’s Raw World Title, which could mean some extra long promos without much being said. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Spirit Squad attacking Shawn Michaels last week, with Marty Jannetty making the save. Marty can have a job tonight, if he joins Vince McMahon’s special club.

Opening sequence.

Here are Edge and Lita to get things going. Edge says Mick Foley’s time is up because it has been a week since Edge challenged him. Foley might have something planned for April 2 but maybe he would rather not waste himself at another indy show or write another book that no one will read. Lita pulls out a pair of tickets to Long Island and if Foley isn’t here, they’re coming to his house.

Cue Foley to say it isn’t that he isn’t man enough to come to Washington DC. It was Edge who lost to John Cena at the Royal Rumble and last week on Raw. Edge was the one who choked, so Edge threatens to choke Foley at Wrestlemania. Foley turns down the Wrestlemania match but points out that he was a three time transitional champion, making him the greatest transitional champion of all time! Edge says Foley will be remembered for three things: having his ear ripped off, being thrown off the Cell and showing up in Vince McMahon’s hospital room with a sock puppet.

See, Foley has never won at Wrestlemania. Yeah he has had his disqualifications and such, but he has never had that classic. Edge is undefeated at Wrestlemania and has had his share of great moments. It’s true that Foley would lose a wrestling match at Wrestlemania, but he would like to challenge Edge to a hardcore match. Lita panics so Foley goes to the back to get some extra incentive. That would be the barbed wire baseball bat so Edge and Lita run off.

Saturday Night’s Main Event is back on March 18.

Tag Team Titles: Kane/Big Show vs. Viscera/Val Venis

Kane and Big Show are defending. Venis strikes away at Kane to start, earning himself a big boot and side slam. Joey tries to shift things over to Jannetty and McMahon but Lawler of all people gets them back on track. Viscera comes in for a Samoan drop and his own near fall but it’s off to Show for the big flying shoulder. A somewhat delayed slam puts Viscera down again and Venis has to make the save. Kane clotheslines Venis down and it’s a double chokeslam to retain the titles.

Rating: D. Another match as we wait around to find challengers for Kane and Show. That has been the case since they won the titles, which is hardly the biggest surprise. There isn’t much that you can do with them, which is a big part of why they have been doing singles stuff for so long. Venis tried as usual though and seeing Viscera thrown around is somewhat impressive.

Ric Flair talks about turning 57 over the weekend and maybe he has one more title run in him.

Shawn Michaels comes up to Marty Jannetty and apologizes for what Marty has gotten into. Marty talks about quitting and getting fired but never doing something like this. He needs to do what he needs to do at the moment though because he needs this job.

Carlito insults Maria and announces that Money in the Bank is coming back at Wrestlemania. Qualifying matches begin tonight.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Rob Van Dam vs. Trevor Murdoch

Murdoch jumps him to start but Rob sweeps the leg and twists it around. A basement dropkick keeps Murdoch in trouble and a kneebar sends Murdoch to the ropes. Murdoch bails outside but Rob’s dive only hits the floor. We get some TREVOR MURDOCH chants as he grabs a reverse chinlock, as the RVD chants take over. The regular chinlock goes on for a bit until Rob sends him into the corner. A running spinwheel kick sets up most of a Rolling Thunder and another kick to the face. The Five Star sends Rob on to Wrestlemania.

Rating: D+. Rob seemed especially sloppy this week but at least they kept it short. These qualifying matches can get a little annoying when they don’t have much drama but Murdoch is someone who is believable enough to make something like this work. At the same time though, there isn’t much that can be done when Rob isn’t exactly nailing his signature stuff.

Video on the Philippines tour.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Candice Michelle

Trish is defending and Mickie James and Torrie Wilson handle the respective introductions. An early Torrie distraction lets Candice get in a wand shot to take over. Some knees in the corner set up the Go Daddy dance but Trish takes her down and hammers away. Candice chokes away on the ropes but Trish grabs a sunset flip. Torrie grabs Candice’s hands, only to have the referee break that up. Trish rolls her up to retain. Not that it matters of course, because Candice’s Playboy cover is unveiled next week, and that’s what really matters.

Mickie is rather happy that Trish won.

Candice slapped Torrie during the break.

Here’s Coach to interview John Cena. Coach talks about how tough of a challenge HHH is going to be but before Cena can respond, here is HHH to interrupt. HHH gets rid of Coach and says that he is the greatest today. Cena talks about how he has been here four years and HHH probably didn’t think he would last two weeks. It’s true that Cena had to work hard to get to the top and now he is here to headline Wrestlemania XXII. HHH laughs it off and talks about Edge and Foley bringing up transitional champions.

That’s all Cena is because he’s just holding it for HHH. Cena is a tough guy, but he’s like Rocky Balboa. He has a lot of passion and pride, but he isn’t a very good wrestler. Rocky always finds a way to win, but this isn’t the movies and Cena can’t beat the bad guy. After that not so great illustration, Cena talks about how he has heard that from a lot of people, so what makes HHH different? HHH says Cena knows he’s different and he can see it in his eyes.

Cena lists off all of HHH’s accomplishments, including HHH being the kind of person who can walk around without the title and have everyone know he’s one of the best in the world. HHH has beaten a lot of names but Cena isn’t on that list. Cue Vince on screen to say that they will be facing off at Wrestlemania but before then, they are going to be teaming together against Kurt Angle/Rey Mysterio/Randy Orton on Saturday Night’s Main Event (with Vince making sure to get in all of the programming information, because he’s a promoter at heart). Good, intense segment, but the SNME announcement felt like it belong elsewhere.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Shelton Benjamin vs. Chavo Guerrero

Non-title and Mama Benjamin is here too. Shelton hammers away and hits a faceplant as Mama seems rather pleased. Or maybe it’s menacing. The chinlock doesn’t last long and Chavo is up with some quick shots to the face. A running headscissors sets up Two Amigos but the third is blocked for a whip out to the floor. Mama glares at Chavo and seems to have more health issues. Back in and Chavo counters a suplex into a DDT but the referee is with Mama. That lets Randy Orton run in for an RKO to give Shelton the pin.

Rating: D+. You know, if you need Randy Orton to help you beat Chavo Guerrero, you might not be the strongest choice for Intercontinental Champion. This Mama deal has crippled any credibility that Benjamin had left and I don’t see it getting any better. The match was short and to the point, though Orton vs. Chavo sounds rather….nothing.

Gene Okerlund is going into the Hall of Fame. The interview highlights alone are worth it.

Shawn begs Vince to not make Marty do this. Vince compares it to the President of France having to do this to George Bush, because that’s still a thing in 2006. Shawn better not get involved.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Carlito vs. Ric Flair

Flair headlocks him over for some one counts to start until Carlito drives him into the corner. A running shoulder puts Flair down and Carlito slaps him in the face. That means a series of chops from Flair and Carlito bails to the floor as we take a break. Back with Flair getting backdropped on the floor but Carlito has to hold his chest.

They head back inside and we hit the chinlock, with Flair chopping his way up. An enziguri into the Flair Flop gives Carlito two but he misses the knee drop. Flair gets in a few shots to the knee but Carlito dropkicks him out of the air. Carlito goes after the leg, only to have Flair sweep him down and grab a rollup (and ropes) for the pin.

Rating: C-. Another short and to the point match here, which wasn’t exactly thrilling stuff. Seeing Carlito take a beating is always nice though and Flair grabbing the ropes for the pin made me smile a bit. It was also nice to have a little drama to the match as you could go either way here, which is often a nice feeling to have.

Here is the Spirit Squad to sing about Marty joining Vince’s club. Vince comes out and talks about Marty leaving before so he must need this job. That brings out Marty, who looks defeated but willing to do what he has to do. Vince knows that Marty needs this job and demands that he get on his knees. Marty eventually does so Vince takes down his pants (Vince: “What are you smiling at Lilian?”), revealing the thong so Vince can deem everything magnificent.

Vince orders Marty to do it like everyone else does and, while Marty seems like he’s about to crack up, Marty gets to his feet and asks if there is another way. Fine enough, so here’s Chris Masters as Vince demands a chair. The Masterlock Challenge is on and Vince adds a low blow before insisting that Marty is going to kiss it.

Cue Shawn Michaels for the save but Shane McMahon pops out from under the ring to chair Shawn down. Vince makes Shane vs. Shawn at Saturday Night’s Main Event in a street fight. Shane makes Shawn kiss it instead and Vince promises to kick Shawn’s at Wrestlemania to end the show.

And then Marty was fired less than a week later and was never seen again.

Overall Rating: C. They have a focus and that’s what matters most at the moment. The show itself was average with some not great wrestling but good segments to advance stories, but the important thing is those stories exist to be built. They have a framework in place for Wrestlemania and you can see where most of the show is going. That’s a rather good sign over a month out and now they just need to hammer in the details over the next few weeks.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – February 20, 2006: It Was Inevitable

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 20, 2006
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

Smackdown is done with its pay per view and that means there is nothing left on the way to Wrestlemania. We need a Raw World Title challenger and that will be taken care of tonight as HHH faces Rob Van Dam and Big Show in a HHH Coronation Special. Other than that, Shelton Benjamin gets an Intercontinental Title shot at Ric Flair. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at the end of last week’s show with Edge blaming guest referee Mick Foley for costing him the World Title match against John Cena and beating him down as a result.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Candice Michelle, Torrie Wilson, Ashley, Maria, Victoria, Mickie James

The winner gets a shot at Trish Stratus at some point in the future, so Trish comes out to watch from the stage. It’s a brawl to start with multiple catfights breaking out and Lawler wanting a wardrobe malfunction. Candice turns on Torrie and dumps her, much to Victoria’s annoyance. Ashley and Maria get rid of Candice and Mickie throws Maria out. Mickie tries a hurricanrana on Victoria but Candice dumps both of them for the win.

Rating: D. This was your fast paced nothing battle royal and that’s all it needed to be. Candice winning is fine for now, as it’s pretty clear what Trish is going to be doing at Wrestlemania anyway. They didn’t waste time with this one, but Lawler managed to make me cringe at least twice anyway. That takes talent.

Post match Candice brags about her accomplishments and does the GoDaddy dance while promising to win the title. Cue Edge and Lita to tell Candice (“Toots”) to get out of here because Edge is the one who should be champion. Edge is furious over what happened last week and says that’s what happens to Foley when he messes with the Rated R Superstar. Foley likes doing Jim Duggan impressions about Lita, so Edge wants a match…..with Duggan, which he’ll be getting tonight. Lita wants Duggan out here right now and Duggan isn’t making her wait.

Jim Duggan vs. Edge

Joined in progress. Duggan clotheslines away to put Edge on the floor but Edge snaps him throat first across the top. Now it’s Duggan being sent outside for a whip into the steps, followed by a dropkick back inside. Duggan slugs away and hits the ten right hands in the corner, plus the spinning slam. Lita grabs the foot though and the spear gives Edge the pin.

Rating: D+. In theory that should wrap up the Duggan stuff, which was funny once or twice but got a little annoying over time. Edge getting so frustrated over everything is a good way to go and setting up up against Foley is a promising thing, so hopefully we can get some of the amazing promos the two of them can do.

Post match, Edge asks if Foley saw that. Foley cost Edge his dream so he’ll make it simple because Foley only has one ear: Edge wants Foley at Wrestlemania and Foley has one week to make up his mind. If not, Edge is coming to Long Island.

Big Show talks about how important it is to go to Wrestlemania. He was in the main event of Wrestlemania 2000 and he knows what it takes to get there. Tonight, it’s a chokeslam to Rob Van Dam and HHH to stop HHH from having a chance to be WWE Champion again.

This date in WWE history: Bob Backlund beats Billy Graham to become World Champion.

Video on John Cena going to India. For some reason this isn’t on the Network version.

Kane vs. Chris Masters

They lock up to start and Kane wins a quick slugout. That’s enough to send Masters outside, where he pulls Kane into the post to take over. Back in and Masters grabs a quickly broken chinlock and Kane breaks up what looked to be a belly to back superplex. The top rope clothesline and a side slam drop Masters but he blocks a big boot and tries the Masterlock. That doesn’t work either and Kane tries his own, which is broken up with elbows to the face. The big boot finishes Masters out of nowhere.

Rating: D+. The streak of not so great wrestling continues tonight and I can’t say I’m exactly surprised. What were you expecting from these two? Kane and Big Show continue to forget that they’re Tag Team Champions, which isn’t exactly surprised given how nothing the tag division has been around here for, uh, well almost ever now.

Post match Masters grabs the Masterlock to send Kane outside.

Rob Van Dam wants to go to Wrestlemania. Serious Van Dam is always weird to see.

We look back at last week’s Shawn Michaels’ retirement ceremony.

Vince McMahon is in his office when the Spirit Squad comes in. He’s glad to see them because four of them are going to face Shawn tonight. The one left out tells the others to do it for him. These guys are growing on me in a weird way.

Intercontinental Title: Ric Flair vs. Shelton Benjamin

Benjamin is challenging and has Mama with him. Speaking of Mama, we cut to the back where she is on oxygen and Shelton dedicates the win to her. Flair hiptosses him into the corner to start and that’s a WOO. Back up and Flair hits a running shoulder, followed by some chops to the floor as we take a break. We come back with the Figure Four attempt being broken up with a kick out to the floor. Shelton follows and drives him into the apron, setting up a suplex over the top for two back inside.

A kick to the neck gets two and Shelton’s frustration is setting in. Flair charges into a boot in the corner and a top rope clothesline gives Shelton two more. Shelton tries his own Figure Four but gets kicked to the apron. A springboard back in is chopped out of the air though and now the Figure Four goes on. Benjamin makes the rope and gets outside, where Mama is having another heart attack. With the medics running out, Shelton gets in a pair of oxygen tank shots into the exploder suplex for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. That’s your match of the night so far as Mama continues to get more attention than Shelton, even as he wins a title. Flair wasn’t exactly doing anything as champion so Shelton is a better fit, even if he has fallen off the face of the planet since Mama showed up. Granted he was almost all the way down before she showed up so maybe it wasn’t the worst thing imaginable.

Post match Mama dances with the title and Flair is all upset.

Video on Stacy Keibler on Dancing With The Stars.

Shawn Michaels vs. Spirit Squad

It’s a four on one handicap match with Kenny hitting a hiptoss into a dropkick to put Shawn in some mild trouble. Johnny comes in but Mikey gets in a cheap shot from the apron, allowing Johnny to kick Shawn in the face. Nicky grabs a chinlock for a bit, followed by Kenny low bridging Shawn to the floor.

The trampoline is set up on the floor and Kenny bounces off of it with a clothesline. Back in and Johnny’s assisted moonsault gets two but Shawn is back with a swinging neckbreaker. Kenny comes back in and misses his top rope legdrop, with Shawn nailing the running forearm. The top rope elbow hits Mikey and Shawn nails the superkick, drawing in the rest of the team to lay Shawn out for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The wrestling hasn’t exactly been hot tonight but this was angle advancement rather than the match itself. The Squad is fine enough in the ring, but it isn’t a good sign when your big draw is having a numbers advantage. If nothing else, it’s kind of a shame after watching these guys do so well in OVW and then get turned into a comedy heel act.

Post match the beatdown is on but Marty Jannetty of all people runs in for the save.

Carlito vs. Nick Burke

Carlito takes the mic from Lilian Garcia and punches Burke down while doing his own commentary. He talks about how he has an idea for Wrestlemania, hits the Backstabber and Rolls the Dice for the pin, then says it’s going to be Money in the Bank.

During the commercial, Matt Striker plugged his profile in GQ Magazine.

Eddie Guerrero is going into the Hall of Fame as well. Yeah that’s as much of a layup as you’re getting.

Here is Vince, who thinks Marty Jannetty should be rewarded for what happened. That’s why next week, Marty is getting a full time contract….if he’ll join Vince’s special club.

HHH talks about how important it is to go to Wrestlemania. He’s that big of a star and deserves to go to the biggest stage.

Wrestlemania Big Time Moment: “This is the biggest match in the history of professional wrestling.”

Road to Wrestlemania Tournament Finals: HHH vs. Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

Show jumps HHH from behind to start and gorilla presses him without much effort. Rob breaks up the cover so Show chops him away. The beating continues with HHH being knocked outside and chopped into the crowd. Rob is right back with a kick to Show but he catches the spinning kick from the apron. HHH gets knocked down again and we take a break.

Back with Show shoving them both into the corner but Rob kicks Show in the head. The alliance forms to try and knock Show down and they finally put him on his knees. Show pops up with a double chokeslam though and they’re all down. A powerslam plants HHH and Rob is sent outside. Rob comes right back in with a top rope kick to Show’s face to put him on the floor for a change. That leaves HHH to get kicked in the face and the split legged moonsault gets two.

The stepover kick puts HHH down again and the Five Star connects but Show is back in. Rob kicks Show down again but HHH knocks him outside. A heck of a chair shot to Show’s head sets up the Pedigree for two, with Van Dam’s save getting a huge reaction. The Five Star connects on Show but HHH grabs the referee. The Pedigree finishes Van Dam to send HHH to Wrestlemania.

Rating: C+. The ending was inevitable as even Show talked about how it was more important to stop HHH from going to Wrestlemania. They didn’t exactly hide what was going on here but Cena vs. HHH does feel like a Wrestlemania main event. Cena is a star, but HHH is always hanging over the whole thing. Not a bad match, even with the obvious ending.

Post match Cena comes out for the big staredown to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a rough sit as there wasn’t much to see until the main event. What matters here though is setting things up for Wrestlemania and you can see a good chunk of the Raw side from here. That’s what matters more than anything else, but it would have been nice to have some better wrestling at the same time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – February 13, 2006: Last Stop

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 13, 2006
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Joey Styles, Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

We’re on the Road to Wrestlemania and it’s tournament time. We’ll probably be finding out the finalists in the tournament to crown a new #1 contender, which could make for some interesting moments tonight. The bigger story is the Raw World Title though, as John Cena defends against Edge with Mick Foley as guest referee. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Road To Wrestlemania Tournament Semifinals: HHH vs. Big Show

They’re not wasting time tonight. Show headbutts him down to start and fires off the chops in the corner, followed by the big gorilla press. A stomp to HHH’s hand draws some screaming before Show lifts him up by the wrist. More shots in the corner keep HHH in trouble and he falls face first for a good visual. The big whip over the corner puts HHH down on the floor but a quick pull sends Show into the post. Blood is drawn and we take a break.

Back with the bloody Show hitting an atomic drop and snapping off some headbutts to drop HHH again. HHH slips out of a slam though and hits a quick Pedigree for two. That means some shock from HHH so he tries another Pedigree, which is countered into White Noise. A poke to the eye breaks up the chokeslam attempt but the second attempt works just fine for two more. They fight outside with Show chopping him against the barricade and hitting a hard whip into the steps. HHH gets in his own whip to the steps but gets grabbed by the throat, meaning it’s a double countout.

Rating: C. Show was looking more crisp than usual here and that’s not something you expect to see from him. He’s one of those guys who doesn’t have to do much in the ring and can get by with it due to his size alone so seeing the motivated version is all the better. The ending is annoying, but I think you know what’s coming.

Post match the fight keeps going and Show loads up the announcers’ table. HHH gets in a low blow to save himself and grabs a chair, only to get speared through the barricade in the visual that always works.

Since Shawn Michaels is retiring tonight, here’s the Lost My Smile speech.

Vince is asked about the tournament and announces that HHH and Big Show will face the winner of Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Masters in a triple threat match for the Wrestlemania title shot. Mama and Shelton Benjamin come in with Mama crying about how her son needs to be the new #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title. Vince says if Shelton wins tonight against Eugene, he can have a title shot. Vince: “Shelton, now please get your Mama out of here.”

Lita hits on Mick Foley but Edge has to save her from not knowing anything about Scooter. Foley expresses his love for Jim Duggan but Edge threatens violence if Foley doesn’t call it fair tonight.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Eugene

Mama is here with Shelton of course. Shelton kicks Eugene in the face for trying to bring Mama some Valentine’s Day chocolates but Eugene Hulks Up in the corner. The airplane spin makes Eugene dizzy but he’s fine enough to grab a northern lights suplex for two. Shelton shrugs it off and hits the exploder for the pin.

Post match Shelton promises to win the title next week.

Your next Shawn highlight: the Curtain Call being shown on Raw.

Ashley vs. Torrie Wilson

Candice Michelle is here with Torrie and Lawler says this match is rated PG for Puppies Are Good. Torrie swings Ashley around by the pigtails to start and then puts her dog in Ashley’s face. A high paw to the dog and some spankings have Ashley in trouble but she grabs a rollup for the fast win.

Post match, Candice says don’t worry….because she’s going to be in Playboy this March. Some stripping ensues.

Another classic Shawn moment: Vince yelling at him in December for suggesting that it was time to let Montreal go.

Here is Vince McMahon to make Shawn Michaels retire. Shawn comes out, apparently for the last time, and Vince has a special present: the best music video anyone has ever seen! Actually scratch that as he has the entire roster here to shake Shawn’s hand. Scratch that also as Shawn’s family has been flown up from San Antonio. That isn’t happening either, but Vince does have the Spirit Squad here for a special Shawn cheer. Apparently it’s time for Shawn to kiss a certain part of Vince and then go to the unemployment line.

Shawn doesn’t seem convinced and Vince can’t believe he feels this way. Not that it matters as Shawn just needs to sign the papers and get it over with already. Shawn says this isn’t what he wants but Vince orders the microphone cut off. That isn’t happening either because walking away just isn’t an option. Shawn loves this job and it’s walking away from the fans. Vince says he’s doing this because Shawn has that inner peace that he can’t have.

All Vince knows is that he has an insatiable appetite for life and he wants more. There is all kind of pressure on Vince and Shawn can’t fathom what it’s like to be him. Shawn can make it all better by signing those papers though because Vince hates people like him. The papers are put in front of Shawn but he tears them up in Vince’s face. Vince slaps Shawn and the tables are turned over but Vince walks away, saying Shawn has just opened up his own personal h***.

And now, the historic announcement: Bret Hart is going into the WWE Hall of Fame on April 1. He’s one of those names you need in the Hall of Fame so this is a nice thing to see. Shocking, but also nice.

Road To Wrestlemania Tournament Semifinals: Rob Van Dam vs. Chris Masters

Masters knocks him down to start but gets kicked in the knee to put him in trouble. Rob’s slingshot legdrop to the apron gets two but a monkey flip is countered with a powerslam for two. A running shoulder knocks Van Dam off the apron and over the barricade for another near fall back inside.

The torture rack (I still wonder why no one has ever used that as a regular finisher as it’s not like Lex Luger has wrestled in about twenty years) goes on but Rob reverses into a sunset flip for two. Rob’s springboard kick to the face gets two more and there’s another kick to the face. Rolling Thunder connects but the Five Star is broken up with a crotching. Rob breaks up a superplex attempt though and hits the Five Star for the pin to advance.

Rating: C-. Not much to see here but it’s not like anyone was giving Masters a serious chance of making the finals when Rob was the other option. I’m not wild on the idea of having a triple threat match for the tournament final but that’s WWE for you. At least Rob seems to be back to normal after his incredibly long recovery time.

Jack (Trish Stratus’ date from a few weeks ago) has some flowers for Trish, but finds Mickie James in a Trish outfit and wig instead. Mickie pins him against the wall but he turns down her advances. She then screams for help and Jack is taken away, with Mickie smiling evilly.

Post break Trish comes in to console the screaming Mickie.

Long video on the history between Edge and John Cena.

Raw World Title: Edge vs. John Cena

Edge, with Lita, is challenging and Mick Foley is guest referee. They fight over a lockup to start with Cena taking him down for an early two. Edge bails to the floor and we take a break. Back with Edge hitting a clothesline but Cena grabs the release fisherman’s suplex for two more. The chinlock goes on but Foley yells at Cena for some reason, allowing Edge to get in a cheap shot.

Edge kicks Cena in the ribs and hits a running forearm to stagger the champ again. Cena gets knocked off the top and Edge sends him into the corner, allowing Lita to remove a turnbuckle pad. Foley catches her though and that means an ejection as we take a break (complete with Goodbye Song). Back with Edge baseball sliding him onto the ramp for a crash, followed by the sleeper, with bodyscissors, back inside. Cena powers up and drops him down for the save but Edge gets up top.

That’s countered into an attempted super FU but Edge reverses into a powerbomb for two with Foley catching the feet on the ropes. Edge’s Impaler gets two more and frustration is setting in. Edge sends Cena into Foley by mistake and the STFU goes on for the unseen tap. Cue Lita, with the distraction letting Edge get in a cheap shot. The belt to the head connects but Foley has to be thrown back in so it’s just two again. That means Edge goes up top for a high crossbody but Cena catches him and rolls through into the FU for the pin to retain.

Rating: B-. Edge and Cena are always worth a look but it’s not like this was going to be matter much in the end. The point of this was to set up Edge vs. Foley and you can guess that Edge isn’t going to be happy with how things went down here. Edge needs something for Wrestlemania and the big showcase match against Foley should work just fine. Cena can get a lot out of Edge, but it’s time for him to move on.

Post match Cena leaves so Lita can hit Foley low, followed by a spear from Edge. A lot of shouting ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show flew by and you can tell that it’s time to start gearing up for Wrestlemania season. That’s a good thing too as there are only so many things you can do with the lower level stuff before it stops having any semblance of importance. It was a good effort this week with important matches and a high level segment, but starting next week things move up to another level with the Wrestlemania build officially beginning.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – September 17, 2007: Cena Is Magically Delicious

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 17, 2007
Location: Sommet Center, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Another request for reasons I’m not clear on. It’s the night after Unforgiven and John Cena is still Raw World Champion, believe it or not. We’re on the way to No Mercy and Randy Orton isn’t likely to leave Cena alone. I’m not sure what to expect from this and that’s often a nice feeling to have. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Orton attacking Cena’s father, including giving him the Punt. That caused Cena Sr. to Punt Orton last night, setting up another Cena vs. Orton showdown, this time in a Last Man Standing match.

Here’s Cena to get things going with….an apology. It’s true that he has been having some pent up aggression lately, but tonight he feels FABULOUS! Last night he lost to Randy Orton, which just kind of rolls off the tongue. He needs to thank his dad for being so brave and showing up like a great dad would. Orton is stupid enough to think that Cena was stupid enough to get disqualified last night, just to set up a rematch.

That brings him to Jonathan Coachman, who has given Orton just what he wants: a Last Man Standing match at No Mercy. That means no rules, no pinfalls and no disqualifications. What he did to Orton last night will be perfectly legal so he’s going through Orton like a hot knife through butter. Cue Coach to say he isn’t happy with Cena, so tonight it’s Orton vs. Cena…..Sr. JR: “This cannot be right!”

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Jeff is defending and is banged up after being taken out by Great Khali last week. Hardy starts fast with the legdrop between the legs for two and we hit the armbar. Shelton reverses into one of his own but gets put on the apron and kicked out to the floor. A dive to the floor hits Shelton and we take a break. Back with Shelton holding a seated abdominal stretch and then grabbing a hot shot for two.

A running knee to the face sets up a neckbreaker for two more on Hardy and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long as Hardy pops up for a double clothesline to put them both down again. Back up and the Whisper in the Wind connects but the Twist of Fate is countered into a backbreaker. Hardy’s suplex is countered into a reverse DDT for two so Shelton takes him up top. This time the superplex attempt is blocked though and the Swanton retains the title.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here, as was commonplace for Hardy around this time. He was rapidly becoming a bigger and bigger star as the title did so much for him. It wasn’t surprising to see him move up to the World Title scene shortly after this, and it was certainly a big hit when he moved up to the next level.

The Diva Search girls played beach volleyball. Oh and had a limbo contest on WWE.com. At least they kept it short.

Coach comes to see Vince McMahon in his limo because the boss isn’t happy about his illegitimate son Hornswoggle, who is restrained in a car seat and eating his Lucky Charms. It’s because he’s a child you see, with Coach carrying him away.

Cena Sr. insists he is wrestling tonight.

Vince and Coach hear Irish music in his office, and there are several boxes of Lucky Charms, green and white balloons, and more music playing. Hornswoggle pops out of a pile of coins, shouts HI DAD, and throws them at Coach before running away. Vince meets a donkey with a horn strapped to its head.

Daivari vs. Jim Duggan

Flag match, with the flags hanging above the ring and the winner being the first to pull it down. Daivari gets slammed off the top for daring to go after the flag but Duggan gets stopped as well. They fight to the top with Duggan sending him into the flag pole, which sends Daivari crashing to the floor so Duggan can win.

Cody Rhodes volunteers to face Orton in Cena Sr.’s place. Coach says no but Cena Jr. says he won’t be responsible if that match isn’t called off. Actually Coach isn’t done yet, and puts him in a match with an opponent of Coach’s choosing. If Cena wins, his dad is out of the match. Otherwise, the match goes on.

Here’s Vince to discuss his son Hornswoggle, who comes out for some dancing. Vince doesn’t like that, but Hornswoggle does seem to like the idea of inheriting some of Vince’s fortune. The point that Vince wants to make is that money doesn’t buy happiness…..so a nice couple is adopting Hornswoggle!

Cue Ed and Alice Koskey, with their attorney of course, but Hornswoggle says don’t do it. Ed is quickly pantsed and choked (JR: “HE’S HAD TOO MUCH CHOCOLATE!”), followed by a bite to Alice. The Koskeys leave and Vince tells Hornswoggle to get out of his life. Cue HHH to a big ovation, so Vince tells the fans to shut up. HHH takes credit for decorating Vince’s office (HHH: “Do you know how hard it is to find a unicorn in Nashville, Tennessee?”) and says he knew Vince liked trolls, but not fairies and hobgoblins.

Vince: “I’ve never slept with fairies!” HHH: “That’s not what I read on the internet.” HHH makes various short jokes so Vince asks if he’s finished. HHH: “That’s the same thing Hornswoggle’s mom asked you the night you slipped her the shillelagh?” Various jokes about the night with Hornswoggle’s mom ensue so Vince makes a handicap match for right now.

HHH vs. Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

Cade and Murdoch’s Tag Team Titles aren’t on the line. Joined in progress with HHH shoving Murdoch out to the floor but Carlito comes out for a distraction so Cade can hit a running neckbreaker. Murdoch grabs a Blockbuster for two as the fans are all over Carlito. The chinlock doesn’t last long and the comeback is on with HHH cleaning house. Murdoch is sent outside and it’s the spinebuster to finish Cade in a hurry.

Rating: D+. That’s how you treat your Tag Team Champions of course, but that’s almost the kind of thing you’re guaranteed to see from WWE. They haven’t thought much of the titles for a long time and while HHH is far from some fluke win, it’s very rarely a good sign to see the champs lose clean in a short match.

Post match Carlito comes in to go after HHH but Paul London and Brian Kendrick run out for the save. HHH beats up everyone, including London and Kendrick.

Melina/Jillian Hall vs. Candice Michelle/Mickie James

Candice is Women’s Champion and Beth Phoenix, who she beat last night, is at ringside. Mickie kicks Melina in the ribs to start but Jillian shoves her off the top so Melina can take over. Some shots to the head allow Mickie to get over for the hot tag to Candice. House is cleaned until Jillian gets in a cheap shot from behind. That’s about it though as Candice grabs the Candy Wrapper (Unprettier) to finish Jillian in a hurry.

Post match, Beth hands Candice the title and gives her a threatening glare.

We look at the Condemned, starring Steve Austin.

Coach says he has disposed of Hornswoggle and Vince is a proud papa. Vince goes to leave….and Hornswoggle is in the trunk.

John Cena vs. ???

It’s non-title and Coach’s pick for an opponent is….Santino Marella? Cena wastes no time and hits the Shuffle in less than thirty seconds but here’s Orton to jump Cena for the DQ in less than a minute.

Post match Orton and Santino (there’s an oddball tag team) beat Cena down and handcuff Cena to the ropes. Cue Coach to say that Cena didn’t quite get the idea: he had to win by PINFALL, so Orton vs. Cena Sr. is still on.

Randy Orton vs. John Cena Sr.

For some reason, Orton walks to the back for the commercial and then comes back for the regular entrance. Cena Jr. is still handcuffed to the rope as Orton knees his dad in the ribs. The beatdown is on until Cody Rhodes runs in for the DQ.

Post match Orton sends Cody into the steps and RKO’s Cena Sr. but Jr. unhooks the bottom rope to escape. Orton is chased off and Cena checks on his dad to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. There wasn’t much in the way of wrestling tonight but I was intrigued by the story they were telling throughout most of the show. The Cena stuff is a good story and makes me want to see Cena tear Orton apart. The problem is that other than the Cena story and Hardy vs. Benjamin, this was a pretty horrible show from a time that isn’t very fondly remembered. Good enough show for the two parts, but that’s all they had here. Oh and HHH’s leprechaun jokes to Vince were funny too, but I have a soft spot for how horribly stupid that whole story was.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6