IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXIII
Date: April 1, 2007
Location: Ford Field, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 80,103
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles

To say this show was a success is an understatement. Until Rock vs. Cena, this show drew more PPV buys than any show in the history of the company, which says a lot when you consider what came before it. The main event here is Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga, which is the Battle of the Billionaires, as Donald Trump and Vince are backing the two respectively. The losing billionaire gets his head shaved. There’s also Cena vs. Shawn in what should be awesome. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a montage of Wrestlemania logos which turns into your usual highlight reel.

We get a clip of the opening of Wrestlemania III before transitioning to Ford Field in the same city. Aretha Franklin is here again twenty years later to sing America the Beautiful again. That’s a very nice touch, as are the clips from Tribute to the Troops.

Now we get the video for this year’s show, which is the All Grown Up theme. It’s a bunch of kids dressed like the stars who then turn into their adult selves.

Mr. Kennedy vs. CM Punk vs. Randy Orton vs. Finlay vs. Matt Hardy vs. King Booker vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Edge

With this match, we start the tradition of having too many people in a single MITB match and overcrowding the thing. Everyone looks up at the case until Kennedy goes to get a ladder. Orton heads to the floor to stop him as the big brawl begins. Finlay DIVES on everyone not named Edge, allowing the Canadian to make a climb, only to be stopped by Matt. They head to the floor, allowing Orton and Finlay to head up top for a brawl on the ladder.

They topple to the floor so it’s Jeff going up, only to be shoved down by Kennedy. Booker goes to pull out a ladder but it’s Horny’s, meaning it’s only about two feet tall. Punk takes it away and pounds on people with it, only to have Edge take over again. This is one of those matches that moves too fast to really keep track of things. Punk is bleeding from the forehead as Edge bridges a ladder between the ring and barricade.

Back inside and Booker takes over with kicks and spinebusters for everyone in sight. Before climbing though, here’s a Spinarooni. The distraction lets the Hardys crush Booker with some ladders before Matt and Edge go at it a bit. The Hardys set up a ladder seesaw but Jeff is sent off the top to break up whatever they were going to do to Edge. Instead Edge suplexes Matt onto the ladder, only to be sent to the floor by Kennedy.

Kennedy pounds away on Matt but the Kenton Bomb only hits ladder. Instead it’s Jeff with a Swanton to Mr. before the brothers team up to drop everyone in sight with the ladder. Both Hardys go up and start slugging it out on top of the ladder, only to be shoved into the top rope by Finlay. Edge hits the spear on Finlay and one for Orton and Booker as well. Kennedy and Matt take spears too and there’s one for Jeff to nearly complete the set. Punk jumps over Edge to send him into the corner and become the only man standing.

Punk puts the ladder around his head and spins around a bit to take everyone out until Edge thinks wisely and DUCKS, allowing him to take out Punk’s vulnerable ribs. Edge gets the big ladder and makes a climb, only to gets caught by Orton and shoved down to the floor. Jeff saves that though and climbs up on his own as Matt puts Edge on the ladder between the ring and the barricade. Jeff dives off the ladder THROUGH EDGE AND THROUGH THE LADDER! Needless to say, Edge and Jeff are DONE.

We’re down to six people in the match now and it’s Orton’s turn to take over with RKOs all around. He picks up a regular sized ladder but Punk knocks him down and sets up a second ladder in the middle of the ring. Apparently Jeff is still on the floor despite Edge being taken out. Orton and Punk both climb up and it’s an RKO off the top of the ladder to end Punk. Booker goes up but has to stop an RKO attempt with a Bookend off the ladder.

It’s Matt vs. Booker on the ladder but Matt drops down and threatens to give Sharmell the Twist of Fate, drawing Booker down. There’s the Twist to the King but Finlay (sporting a NASTY cut on the back of his head) shoves the ladder over. The Celtic Cross (White Noise) crushes Matt against the ladder but hurts Finlay’s back in the process. Finlay is barely able to stand so here’s Horny to climb for him.

Instead though Kennedy pops up the ladder….and gets smacked in the face by Horny. There’s a fireman’s carry roll off the ladder for the little guy’s efforts. Finlay destroys Kennedy with the ladder but gets knocked off the ladder by Matt. Now it’s Punk going up but Kennedy meets him on the ladder for a slugout. Punk shoves him off but Kennedy spears him in the ribs with another ladder, allowing Kennedy to climb up and win the case.

Rating: B. This was definitely the weakest of the matches so far as there were too many people in there and no one to have the big spots like Shelton. It’s definitely good but this one lacked the pop that most of these matches had over the years. Kennedy would lose the case to Edge a few weeks later.

Video on the premiere of The Condemned so we can clear the ring out.

Kennedy warns every champion that he’s coming for them and says he’s Mr. Money in the Bank. Bank.

Batista is All Grown Up.

Great Khali vs. Kane

This is when Khali is still a decent monster who could move a little bit. Kane is easily shoved down to start and then shoved to the floor for good measure. Back in and Kane slugs Khali, only to be chopped right back down. Off to the nerve hold before Khali slugs away in the corner. Kane comes back with punches of his own but is easily shoved down and across the ring.

Kane fires back with a right hand and tries the top rope clothesline but it only staggers Khali. Another shot sends Khali into the ropes and Kane has his opening. Kane heads to the floor and grabs a chain with a hook on the end which he used in the horror movie he was in around this time. Khali knocks him back and rips off the turnbuckle pad to distract the referee, allowing Kane to kick him low. In one of the big spots of the show, Kane slams Khali ala Hogan slamming Andre twenty years ago. That only gets two so they both grab chokeslams, but it’s Khali hitting the Punjabi Plunge for the one footed pin.

Rating: D-. The slam was cool and the rest was completely horrible. Khali was nothing good and somehow he would get even worse. Kane was in that weird period for him where he was just kind of there and doing nothing of note. By period, I mean about a five year stretch of course. Terrible match but the slam was good.

Post match Khali chokes him out with the chain and no one makes the save.

The Divas say they’re All Grown Up. The idea of taking them seriously is amusing.

Cryme Tyme tries to cheer up a now bald Eugene with an Extreme Expose dance party. That would be Kelly, Layla and Brooke (now Tessmacher) as a dance troupe. Instead Moolah and Mae Young show up and Eugene wants to dance with them. Cue REVEREND SLICK of all people to show us how it’s done. This brings in Dusty Rhodes who says you can’t have a dance party without him. The music comes back on and here are Sgt. Slaughter, Jimmy Hart and IRS to join in. Ricky Steamboat in full karate attire shows up until we get the Ron Simmons payoff.

Some Detroit Tigers are here.

US Title: MVP vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is defending and MVP is pretty new here. They head to the mat to start with MVP actually in control. Off to a headlock by the challenger but he has to shove Benoit to the floor to avoid the Crossface. Back in and Benoit can’t hook the Crossface as MVP keeps it on the mat with the headlocks. Back up and MVP pounds Benoit into the corner but charges into an elbow. A superplex attempt is blocked and Benoit’s arm is draped across the top rope to shift momentum again.

Back in and MVP works over the bad arm with some driving shoulder blocks. He misses a spinning kick though and Benoit busts out the Rolling Germans. The Swan Dive is broken up though and MVP goes back to the arm by sending it into the post. Off to an armbar again, followed by a running clothesline for two. Out of nowhere Benoit reverses a slam into a Crossface attempt but the arm is too weak to hook the hold. This time the slam works and there’s the Ballin elbow for two. MVP misses a charge into the corner and it’s time to roll some Germans. After four of those, Benoit hits the Swan Dive to retain.

Rating: C. Yeah that’s it. The match really never got off the ground and could have used another four minutes or so. As always the scariest part is thinking that Benoit only had about two months left so he likely wasn’t sane during this match. The match itself wasn’t bad but as mentioned it never got off the ground. MVP would win the title at Backlash and hold it for almost a year.

Video on Undertaker who is All Grown Up….I think.

Donald Trump is in his dressing room and complaining about the lack of food and drinks backstage. Boogeyman comes in for no apparent reason and Trump doesn’t seem impressed. Trump asks him for a sandwich. This uh…..happened. Yeah we’ll go with that.

Hall of Fame time. Mr. Perfect was one of the headliners here and gets a pretty touching tribute. William Shatner inducted Lawler, which is kind of annoying as Lawler had wanted Lance Russell (announcer of Memphis Wrestling for like forty years) to do it but WWE said no and picked Shatner because of a forgotten segment on Raw back in like 1995. The other headliner was Dusty Rhodes who asked to be made an honorary Horseman. That’s just wrong. No presentation to the crowd here which is weird.

The attendance is over 80,000, which is of course a new record.

Here’s the Fink because what would Wrestlemania be without him? Oh ok he’s doing the Hall of Fame live presentation to the crowd. JR gets easily the biggest pop of the entire class.

82% of the fans think Undertaker will win the title.

We recap Undertaker vs. Batista but there isn’t much to say. Taker won the Rumble and picked Batista for an awesome power match. They had to team up at No Way Out and Batista turned on him to give us a one night only heel, even though that’s not really too far out of Batista’s normal behavior.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Undertaker

Teddy Long does the intros here for some reason. We lso get the druids and the torches, which look AWESOME in the huge stadiums like this. The bell rings and Batista spears Taker down before pounding away in the corner. Undertaker fires off right hands of his own but Batista throws him right back into the corner. The fans are totally behind Undertaker here. They head to the floor with Undertaker being sent knees first into the steps as is his custom.

Back in and Batista hits a top rope shoulder for two. If you’re listening to Cole, you would think he had hit a 450. A big clothesline puts Taker down for two but Undertaker comes back with right hands and a running charge in the corner. The Snake Eyes and big boot combo puts Batista down and a legdrop gets two. Old School connects but Big Dave powers out of the chokeslam to huge booing.

The jumping clothesline puts Batista down again but only for two. Taker puts him on the apron for the elbow and legdrops before busting out the Taker Dive as is his custom at Wrestlemania. Taker pounds away even more but Batista counters to throw him through part of the barricade to take over. With Undertaker dazed, Batista loads up a powerslam from one announce table through the other, which actually isn’t countered.

Back in and that only gets two so the champion pounds away more for good measure. Batista loads up the Bomb but Taker plows him into the corner to counter. Dave comes right back with a belly to belly suplex for two. He pounds on Taker in the corner like a schmuck and of course there’s the Last Ride for two. Taker has a breather but walks right into the spinebuster.

Batista doesn’t cover though and gets caught in a chokeslam for a VERY close two. The Tombstone is countered and Batista hits the spear and Batista Bomb for an even closer two, shocking the champion. Batista loads up another Bomb but Taker backdrops out of it and avoids a spear, setting up the Tombstone for the title.

Rating: A. The idea is that these two were annoyed and decided to have an awesome match to show everyone up. These two would go on to have more great matches on shows where Batista actually had a chance to win. This was the feud of the year and it’s hard to argue as they could both work the power game like few others.

Lashley is All Grown Up.

Vince is in the back looking in a mirror when Stephanie comes in with a stroller. Vince goes off on Stephanie before playing with his granddaughter. Naturally there’s a camera from inside the stroller looking up at Vince. He promises to fracture Trump’s skull.

Joey tries to talk about the ECW Originals vs. the New Breed but we need to get this along.

New Breed vs. ECW Originals

It’s Elijah Burke/Matt Striker/Kevin Thron/Marcus Cor Van vs. Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer/Sabu and for no reason whatsoever this is a regular eight man tag instead of the Extreme Rules match we would get on ECW a few days later. Striker starts with Sabu and Matt is in early trouble. It’s quickly off to Sandman vs. Burke but before Sandy does much he brings in Dreamer. Cor Von hits Dreamer in the back and comes in to pound away a bit.

It’s quickly back to Burke (the New Breed’s leader and more famous as D’Angelo Dinero) for the running knees to the back for two. Thorn comes in to crush Dreamer into the corner and put on a chinlock. Back up and a sitout powerbomb gets two for Thorn and here’s Cor Von again. Burke comes in as well but Dreamer takes them down with a simultaneous neckbreaker/reverse DDT combo. The hot tag brings in Van Dam and there’s the top rope kick to Thorn. Rolling Thunder lands on Striker as everything breaks down. With everyone else on the floor, Van Dam Five Stars Striker for the pin.

Rating: D+. Seriously, why wasn’t this the Extreme Rules match? The whole point of ECW is to be extreme but we got a seven minute tag match which went nowhere at all. The theory was to finally let these guys get on Wrestlemania, but Van Dam had been on it before and won a title here. Nothing to see here at all.

Austin is All Grown Up.

Wrestlemania 24 is in Orlando.

We recap the real main event for tonight’s show and the reason why this show was the highest drawing show ever for the next five years. Vince and Donald Trump both agreed to back a guy into a match and the losing billionaire would get their head shaved. This was when Trump was still a big deal and EVERYONE was backing Umaga because they wanted to see Trump bald. Oh except for Rock who actually cut a promo about wanting to see Vince bald.

Trump picked the ECW World Champion Bobby Lashley. Steve Austin was brought in to referee because this is Wrestlemania. The best part of the build was Lashley in a cage with Umaga on the floor. To escape, Lashley shoulder blocked the cage wall, knocking it down to the floor and nearly crushing Umaga in the process.

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

The barber’s chair gets its own entrance complete with some snappy music. Oh and Umaga is IC Champion. Trump coming out to a song with the only word being MONEY is perfect. Real money rains down from the ceiling, including $100 bills. To be fair this show brought in like 50 million dollars in PPV alone so they can afford a bit. They collide to start and slug it out with Lashley pounding him into the corner. Austin pulls Lashley off of Umaga since they’re in the ropes and Umaga gets in some shots of him own. Lashley goes up to the middle rope for a shoulder for two.

Umaga’s manager Armando Estrada is dragged in by Lashley and powerslammed down with ease. Lashley throws him out to the floor and low bridges Umaga to send him to the floor as well. Back in and Lashley misses a spear, sending him out to the floor this time. We head inside again and Umaga chokes away, only to be pulled off at four and a half by Austin. Austin has to do it again, this time by the hair for good measure.

A BIG clothesline puts Lashley down again and Umaga cannonballs down onto his chest for good measure. The Samoan drop puts Lashley down again as does a failed slam attempt. Vince gets up on the apron and gets dropped down by an elbow from Lashley, only to walk into a shot from Umaga to take over again. Umaga goes up and gets slammed down before being clotheslined down. Both guys down and Austin gets to nine before stopping so it doesn’t end in a draw.

Shane McMahon comes out to check on Vince as Umaga hits an uppercut to drop Lashley again. Austin has to pull Umaga out of the corner, earning him a Samoan Spike. Shane comes in and pounds away on Lashley until Umaga is back into things. The running hip attack crushes Bobby’s face and Vince throws in some trashcans. Shane hits the Coast to Coast to drive the can into Lashley’s face. A top rope splash from Umaga crushes Lashley and Shane has a referee’s shirt on now.

Austin breaks up the pin and beats up Shane for good measure, only to walk into another Samoan Spike. Trump isn’t sure what to do and shows off those great acting skills of his. Vince comes over to taunt him and TRUMP CLOTHESLINES VINCE! Umaga tries another Spike on Austin but gets countered into the Stunner. The spear from Lashley connects and it’s time for Vince to be bald.

Rating: D. This match sucked for the most part until Austin got going. The problem at the end of the day was no one on the planet with any idea what was going on here thought Vince was going to win. It also didn’t help that no one cared about Lashley because no one had ever given us a reason to. He was just kind of there for the most part and there was nothing more to him than he used to be a college wrestler and he’s muscular. Seriously, that’s Lashley’s story almost in full.

Post match they take FOREVER to Stun Vince and cut his hair. Austin Stuns him because that’s what Austin does to Vince. To their credit though, they SHAVE his head, not just trim it. Vince’s face during this whole thing is great as he goes from shock to the patented Vince rage in a few seconds. This led to three months of Vince/Shane/Umaga vs. Lashley which didn’t work for the most part. Austin, Lashley and Trump share beers and Trump gets Stunned. I’ll give the guy this: he has a soft spot for wrestling. He hosted two Wrestlemanias, was in the crowd for two more and did this.

John Cena is All Grown Up.

For no apparent reason other than we have nothing else to talk about, we look at the dark match with Flair/Carlito vs. Gregory Helms/Chavo Guerrero in a lumberjack match.

Womens Title: Melina vs. Ashley

It’s a lumberjill match and all of the other Divas are introduced. Melina is defending here because thank goodness Ashley never got the title. Ashley, who isn’t a wrestler, takes Melina down and pounds away. The crowd is audibly quiet for this match and can you blame them? Ashley pounds away in the corner and does some bad choking but Melina comes back by SCREAMING. Off to a bow and arrow for a bit as I have no interest in watching this match at all. Ashley misses an elbow and thankfully Melina reverses a rollup into one of her own to retain.

Rating: M. As in Mickie James, who was on the floor during this match instead of in the ring. Point blank, Ashley cannot wrestle. She was decent looking, but other than that she had nothing going for her at all. This was a popcorn break match and thankfully it was barely three minutes long as I couldn’t sit through much longer.

Shawn Michaels is All Grown Up.

We recap Michaels vs. Cena. Shawn won a triple threat to set this up and then won the tag titles with Cena. The idea is Shawn has turned on every one of his partners in his career and he’ll do it again here. No music video here for some reason.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Remember that they’re tag champions here but neither guy wears the belt. I can’t say I blame them of course. Cena’s special entrance this year is driving a muscle car from “the parking lot” into the arena due to being in Detroit. They circle each other to start before Shawn slaps him in the face. A quick headlock doesn’t do much for Shawn so he uses his speed advantage to pop John with some right hands. Back to the headlock and it works a bit better this time as Shawn takes Cena down to the mat.

Cena has had enough of this defense thing and rings Shawn’s bell with a clothesline. Shawn is sent to the apron but he tosses Cena from the ring and out to the floor. A BIG chop staggers Cena but Shawn’s Asai Moonsault hits mostly table and Shawn is hurt. Luckily for him though Cena is even more hurt as they head back inside. Shawn chops away in the corner before going after Cena’s knee. The leg is wrapped around the post and Cena is in trouble. The referee asks Cena if he can continue and of course Cena says yes.

Shawn keeps kicking at the leg before wrapping it around the ring rope. With Cena down in the corner, Shawn stares straight at him to play even more mind games. Back up and John hits a big right hand to send Shawn flying across the ring. Shawn charges straight back at him with a shoulder into the ribs in the corner to keep control. Michaels charges again but Cena’s leg gives out and Shawn goes head first into the post, busting him open.

Cena has had enough of getting beaten up so he punches Shawn down before firing off some mounted right hands. The ProtoBomb and Shuffle hit but Shawn punches his way out of the FU. Cena is sent into the corner but manages to duck Sweet Chin Music. The referee isn’t so lucky though and is knocked senseless. Cena tries the FU but is countered into a DDT to put both guys down.

With no referee in sight, Shawn rolls to the floor and hits a sick piledriver onto the steps. The THUD when Cena’s head hit was a little scary. The back of Cena’s head is cut open BAD on top of that. Back in and here’s a second referee but the count only gets two. There are the forearm and nip-up as the blood flows down Shawn’s face. The top rope elbow connects but Cena blocks Chin Music with a big clothesline to put both guys down again.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring but the FU is countered again into a sunset flip for two. Shawn’s leap frog is caught in the FU but Cena is too banged up to cover. The very delayed cover gets two and the champ is getting frustrated. With nothing else to do he tries an FU off the top, only to be shoved off by Shawn. Michaels dives at Cena but gets caught in the FU position. He counters that as well though by landing on his feet, only to miss the superkick and have Cena try for the STFU. Cena keeps trying for it but gets small packaged down for two instead.

Shawn misses an enziguri attempt and now the STFU is on. Cena cranks back on it but Shawn is only a few inches away from the rope. As Shawn starts to black out he grabs the rope and Cena has to break. He takes a bit too long though and gets in an argument with the referee, allowing Shawn to kick Cena’s head off. Another delayed cover gets two and both guys are down. In a cool spot, both guys have to lean on the other to get up. The FU is countered again but Shawn can’t avoid the STFU again. Cena cranks back on it and Shawn has no choice but to tap out.

Rating: A-. This was a much better match than the HHH match from the year before for a few reasons. First of all, there was a story behind the match. As simple as it was, Shawn being Cena’s partner gave them a bond and seeing them fight was something interesting to see. Second, the drama was better here. Cena felt like he was in real trouble and that the title was in danger, which I never felt last year. It’s a better match overall and they would have even better ones in the future.

A highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: B+. This is a show where the stuff that is bad is really bad but the stuff that is good is REALLY good. There are only eight matches on the card and three of them are very good to great. The best part about that though is the bad matches (other than one) were all short and pretty easy to get through. The show is completely forgettable other than Trump vs. Vince and maybe Undertaker vs. Batista, but it’s worth seeing. I would however recommend fast forwarding through some of the weaker parts.

Ratings Comparison

CM Punk vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Finlay vs. Randy Orton vs. King Booker vs. Jeff Hardy vs. Booker T vs. Edge

Original: B+

Redo: B

Great Khali vs. Kane

Original: D

Redo: D-

Chris Benoit vs. MVP

Original: B

Redo: C

Undertaker vs. Batista

Original: B+

Redo: A

ECW Originals vs. New Breed

Original: D+

Redo: D

Bobby Lashley vs. Umaga

Original: C-

Redo: D

Melina vs. Ashley

Original: F

Redo: M (for Mickie James)

John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: B+

Almost everything goes down and the rating goes up. I’m a complex guy sometimes.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/30/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-23-over-80000-people/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: March 26, 2019
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton, Tom Phillips

Ok it has to be tonight right? I mean it has to be. Tonight has to be the setup for Kofi Kingston vs. Daniel Bryan for Wrestlemania. Now when I say has to be, I mean it should be but probably won’t be as WWE is likely waiting until the very last possible chance to make the match for some reason. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s New Day to get things going. That means a lot of chanting for Kofi, which shouldn’t be very surprising at this point. If Woods could be serious for a minute, the last few months have been an emotional roller coaster and the fans have been here from NEW DAY SUCKS to NEW DAY ROCKS. It’s been worth every bit of it and the KOFI/NEW DAY ROCKS chants begin.

However, given all the obstacles places in Kofi’s path, they’re considering walking away from WWE. Kofi has been treated badly for eleven years and he’s lived the power of positivity the whole time. They can’t make a decision until they get answers and they would need to be from Mr. McMahon. Therefore, they’re not leaving the ring until Vince comes out here. Cue Vince but before he can say anything, Daniel Bryan and Rowan interrupt instead. Bryan says New Day is a stale novelty act that Vince created and all he has to do is bring up three people from NXT, call them Fresh Afternoon and have them throw waffles into the crowd.

Kofi is a loser and Vince shouldn’t let Big E. and Woods get in his head. Vince has been right to keep Kofi out of the title picture and the people refuse to accept that reality. Bryan and Kofi argue about who is the hypocrite but Vince wants everyone to shut up. He doesn’t like the threats of quitting that were never going to happen.

Vince still sees Kofi as a B+ player but the question is if New Day is a B+ tag team. There is a way for Kofi to get to Wrestlemania: Big E./Xavier have to win….a tag team gauntlet match. Are they really managing to be this lazy on the Road to Wrestlemania? Doing three gauntlet matches in about seven weeks is their brilliant idea?

In the back, Becky Lynch talks about how she’s bringing the people and Ronda Rousey is bringing the title, but what does Charlotte bring? Charlotte comes out to the ring and says she’ll show you how worthy she is.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Asuka vs. Charlotte

Asuka is defending and the announcers are rather stunned. They fight over wrist control to start until Asuka grabs a headlock. A shot to the ribs puts Charlotte on the floor and we take a break. Back with Asuka getting two off a sunset flip but getting kicked in the knee. Asuka shrugs off the kicks and hits a hip attack in the corner, followed by a sliding basement dropkick for two. Another hip attack misses and Charlotte kicks her in the face. Charlotte’s moonsault is countered into the Asuka Lock with a rollup getting Charlotte out of trouble.

Back from a second break with Asuka getting two more off another kick to the head. Asuka heads up top but gets caught in a super Spanish Fly for a rather near fall in a spot you almost never see on the main shows. The followup takes too long though and it’s a triangle choke from Asuka, which is reversed into a sitout powerbomb (What else would it be?). The Figure Eight gives Charlotte the title at 15:52.

Rating: B. Another very good match from these two as they work well together, but that’s quite the curve ball for the main event. Odds are this leads to a unified title, which is the best thing for everyone right now. You have Asuka, Rousey, Becky and Charlotte at the moment and if Rousey is leaving, there’s no need for two titles between three big stars. Let the rest of the division fight over the Tag Team Titles and go with the traveling champion, as it’s best for everyone.

With Asuka down on the floor, Kurt Angle comes out for his match. Way to make the women look important there guys.

AJ Styles is honored to be Kurt Angle’s final Smackdown opponent and isn’t taking this match lightly.

AJ Styles vs. Kurt Angle

They shake hands and hug before the match before AJ pulls him down into the Calf Crusher. Angle is about to tap but hangs on long enough to reverse it into the ankle lock. AJ sends him into the corner for the break and here’s Randy Orton with an RKO to Styles for the DQ at 1:30. NOW WHY COULDN’T THEY DO THAT WITH SAMOA JOE LAST NIGHT???

Post match Angle gives Orton the Angle Slam, dropping him on the way to the mat.

Rey Mysterio and his son Dominick say that Samoa Joe isn’t going to have a good time at Wrestlemania when Rey becomes the new US Champion.

Here’s Miz for a chat, but first he needs to agree with the MIZ IS AWESOME chants. We’re twelve days away from Wrestlemania and the only thing he can imagine is ripping Shane McMahon limb from limb. Miz wants to hurt Shane so badly that he wants to change things a bit by making it a Falls Count Anywhere match. This brings out Shane, albeit behind a group of security guards and various midcarders. After having the ring announcer do a well done introduction, Shane says Miz sounds as dumb as his father looked.

We see an image from Fastlane of Shane grabbing Miz’s dad by the face with Shane saying it makes him feel better every time he sees it. Shane loved hurting Miz’s dad to the point where it was euphoric. Therefore, the stipulation is accepted, though Shane says he made a mistake of not hurting Miz even more. It was the biggest mistake since Miz’s father impregnated his mother.

Miz beats up the security and the wrestlers (to be fair it was Sanity and Shelton Benjamin) as Shane watches from the stage. A dive off the barricade lets Miz beat then into the crowd in a rather strong moment. They’re getting twenty minutes at Wrestlemania aren’t they? They’ve presented the thing as the third biggest match on the show so far.

We look back at the opening segment.

We look back at the Women’s Title match.

We look back at the SNL guys agreeing to enter the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal.

The IIconics are excited to be in the Women’s Tag Team Title match.

Tag Team Gauntlet Match

If New Day wins, Kofi gets his title shot at Wrestlemania. Big E./Xavier Woods are in first and Anderson and Gallows are in second. Woods goes straight at Anderson to start and it’s UpUpDownDown for the elimination at 49 seconds, which isn’t even enough time for me to make fun of Anderson and Gallows for still being around.

Rusev and Shinsuke Nakamura are in third as a crowd is gathering to watch backstage, including the Hardys, Rey Mysterio and Becky Lynch. Woods headscissors Nakamura down but misses a Stinger Splash in the corner. That lets Nakamura hit the running knee in the corner and Woods is sent outside as we take a break.

Back with Good Vibrations and a knee drop getting two as the audience has grown. The reverse exploder is countered and it’s Big E. coming in for some overhead belly to bellies. The Warrior Splash looks to set up the Big Ending but Big E. gets sent outside. That means a whip into the steps for Rusev but he’s fine enough for the Machka Kick back inside. Woods is back in for a dive onto Rusev as Kinshasa misses. Nakamura goes into the post and UpUpDownDown pins Nakamura at 9:27 total.

The Bar is in fourth and we’re joined in progress with Sheamus working on Big E.’s leg before handing it off to Cesaro. That means the Swing into the Sharpshooter but Big E. kicks him out to the floor. The hot tag is broken up but Big E. manages to fight them both off and, after a backdrop to Cesaro, the hot tag brings in Woods. Everything breaks down and it’s a big flip dive onto the Bar. A guillotine legdrop gets two on Cesaro with Sheamus diving in for a save.

Back from another break with Big E. caught in a half crab from Cesaro but Sheamus charges into a powerbomb. It’s back to Woods, who dives into an uppercut for two. The spike White Noise is broken up though and it’s a rollup to pin Sheamus at 23:55. We’re not done though as the Bar takes out Big E. and powerbomb him through a table.

The Usos are in fifth and want Big E. to get up and fight. Hang on though as Jimmy grabs a mic and says the Usos have fought wars against the New Day. Kofi deserves the shot so since he’s already earned respect from everyone….so the Usos forfeit at 26:23. We cut to the back where Bryan and Rowan freak out and wreck their locker room (that’s a lot of chairs for two people).

Back from another break with Rowan and Daniel Bryan being announced as the final team. Big E. can barely stand so Bryan wraps his leg around the post as Rowan crossbodies Woods. We settle down to a regular match with Bryan stomping on Big E. and grabbing something like an ankle lock/half crab hybrid. Big E. gets over for the hot tag to Big E. anyway and it’s a flip dive onto Rowan.

The Rock Bottom out of the corner plants Bryan and the Big Ending connects but Rowan makes the save. The claw slam gets two and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. Woods is back up with a tornado DDT off the steps to drop Bryan and Rowan goes into the post twice in a row. A clothesline sends Rowan over the table and Big E. turns it on top of him to win via countout at 37:49.

Rating: C+. I liked this one better with the slightly shorter length and some more creative ways to end some falls. Above all else, the champions involved didn’t get pinned, which is a lot better than what I was expecting. The problem is I also expect New Day to turn on Kofi for getting him into the match and leaving him with the glory.

A rather calm Vince gets in his limo and says Kofi is going to Wrestlemania to face Daniel Bryan for the title.

The locker room comes out to celebrate with Kofi to end the show.

Overall Rating: B+. Well they nailed this one for the most part, assuming you don’t mind a strong curve in Charlotte winning the title. Kofi FINALLY being set up for the title match is a great thing, though I don’t think he gets the title. I’m rather relieved that they didn’t have Angle go over AJ and they even threw in some storyline advancement. Throw in no mention of the Women’s Battle Royal or the Smackdown Tag Team Title matches and I’m very pleased.

Results

Charlotte b. Asuka – Figure Eight

AJ Styles b. Kurt Angle via DQ when Randy Orton interfered

New Day won a gauntlet match last eliminating Daniel Bryan and Rowan

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: March 21, 2019
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Renee Young, Byron Saxton, Percy Watson

As tends to be the case around this year, it’s time to hurry things along as we have to build up Wrestlemania in a hurry since WWE feels the need to add things in as fast as they can. I’m not sure what to expect here, but I’d assume some short matches that don’t mean much will be included. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Rezar vs. Curt Hawkins

Zack Ryder is here to counter the force that is Drake Maverick. Hawkins charges straight at him but gets shoved down and a fall away slam makes things even worse. Back in and Rezar hammers in some crossface forearms and the chinlock goes on. A side slam gets two and we hit the neck crank. Hawkins fights up for some dropkicks as the fans are behind him here. A superkick to the ribs into a DDT gets two and another DDT sets up the top rope elbow for another near fall. Rezar is right back up and the chokeslam finishes Hawkins at 5:53.

Rating: D. I’m getting into Hawkins more every week and that’s rather impressive considering what he’s been doing for about two and a half years now. He’s trying to get this over and it takes a lot to get fans into a character that has no chance of winning. The big win is going to be a cool moment, though I’ve been saying that for over a year now.

From Raw.

Raw Women’s Title: Ronda Rousey vs. Dana Brooke

Ronda is defending and if there is any justice in the world, Dana shouldn’t lay a finger on her and then lose in about thirty seconds. Rousey knees her in the face, knees her in the ribs and the armbar finishes Brooke in 19 seconds.

Rousey won’t let go of the arm until some referees come out. Ronda beats them up too and goes over to her husband, who hits a guard for trying to hold her back. Browne pulls Ronda over the barricade.

From Smackdown.

It’s time for the KO Show with Kevin Owens talking about how tonight is all about Kofi Kingston. He’ll be watching the gauntlet match closely, but for now we need to get to the guests. That would be Becky Lynch and Charlotte with Owens talking about how Becky is willing to fight Charlotte and Ronda Rousey at the same time.

As for Charlotte, Becky has said that she was shoehorned into the match and doesn’t belong. What Owens knows is that everyone is sick of hearing them talk and want to see the two of them fight. They stand up, Owens, leaves, and the fight is on. Security and referee get beaten up as well as the fans are very pleased with Becky.

We look at Drew McIntyre attacking Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose.

From Raw.

Drew McIntyre vs. Seth Rollins

The fight is on in the aisle with referees and security out to break it up. Joined in progress with Drew pulling him down into an armbar with the pressure on the face. A hard shot to the face keeps Rollins in trouble and they head outside, where Seth misses a moonsault off the steps to send us to a break. Back with Drew stomping on Seth’s back as it’s all McIntyre so far.

Seth gets knocked outside for a belly to belly onto the barricade…and it’s time for a chair. That takes too long though and Rollins scores with a kick to the face. Back to back suicide dive set up a Sling Blade for two but the reverse Alabama slam knocks him silly again. McIntyre takes him up top gets punched in the face, only to have Rollins slip out for the superplex into the Falcon Arrow for two. The fans are WAY into this as Heyman and Lesnar come out for a distraction, allowing McIntyre to hit the Claymore for the pin at 14:13.

Rating: B. This was starting to rock at the end and as tired as I am of that ending, it did what it needed to accomplish. Lesnar gets to prove that he’s smart enough to mess with Rollins and McIntyre looks strong before going on to face Reigns. Lesnar’s distraction might not have been inspired stuff, but at least it went the right way after a pretty awesome match while it lasted.

From Raw.

Batista joins us via satellite and says he doesn’t like HHH. He’s wanted one more match with HHH but can’t get his attention. Batista has heard about how he owes his career to HHH but all HHH ever did was groom him to be the muscle. There’s more to him than just being a meathead and it was HHH who caused him to quit nine years ago. There were goals that Batista wanted to accomplish but HHH was cutting him off. Now look at what Batista has accomplished since leaving WWE.

Cole defends HHH but Batista doesn’t buy it. HHH is a cerebral assassin and now he’s gotten in Cole’s head too. The real HHH is a manipulative control freak so hopefully Vince McMahon fires him one day and ends his corporate career. Then at Wrestlemania, Batista can end his in-ring career. Interview over. That’s the explanation I’ve been waiting on and it cleared up enough to make the story work. It’s still a stretch, but at least it’s a story that can make sense.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Titus O’Neil/Lucha House Party vs. Revival/Ascension

SERIOUSLY??? This is what the Revival has been reduced to less than a month before Wrestlemania??? We take a break at the bell because no one cares about this show. Back with Kalisto in trouble in the corner but kneeing his way out of Konnor’s suplex attempt. The hot tag brings in Titus to clean house with the Clash of the Titus finishing Viktor at 6:43. Nowhere near enough shown to rate but the Revival did not need to be slumming it like this.

We get clips of Kofi Kingston’s gauntlet match.

From Smackdown.

Post match Big E. and Woods come out to celebrate and here’s Vince McMahon to interrupt. Vince congratulates Kofi, who is going to Wrestlemania….if he can beat one more person. That would be Daniel Bryan, who kicks away in the corner to start. A knee to the ribs cuts off Kofi’s comeback and Bryan ties him in the Tree of Woe for more kicks to the ribs.

Bryan gets two off a top rope belly to back superplex and we hit the LeBell Lock. Kofi gets a foot on the rope for the break The YES Kicks are countered into the SOS for two and the fans gasp on the kickout. Some running corner dropkicks connect with Kofi reversing the third into another rollup. Bryan avoids a spinning high crossbody and stomps away at the head and it’s the running knee for the pin at 1:00:06 total.

Rating: B. It was long and exactly as advertised, but if this company EVER stopped moving the goalposts, I think my head would explode. It’s the same thing as the Becky Lynch story where the evil boss just feels like being evil and changes the match. I’m sure Kofi will get the title shot, but we’re long past the point of this being surprising. It’s just the move that WWE makes and that’s not a good thing.

The match itself was however a good thing with Kofi showing that he can hang in there for a long time at a high quality, which is exactly what he’s done for years. The fans want to see him, but you can only keep doing this “HAHA EVIL BOSS” stuff before it stops mattering. Considering that it’s happening in two big matches, it’s rather taxing and downright annoying.

New Day checks on Kofi to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Now this is more like it with Main Event as we get a nice balance between the two shows instead of everything from Raw for a change. Wrestlemania season is the part of the year that matters most and in this case we actually got a nice set of recaps. The original content was rather terrible but it’s not like that matters in the slightest. Nice show this week, which is more than I would have bet on.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXII
Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 17,159
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Really there isn’t much else to talk about here. The other major match on the show is Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon in a match over Vince not being willing to grow up and let go of some things in his past. The card just doesn’t feel big this year which was the case with most of the stuff this year. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Raw: Eugene, Viscera, Goldust, Rob Conway, Lance Cade, Matt Striker, Trevor Murdoch, Tyson Tomko, Snitsky

Smackdown: Funaki, Super Crazy, Simon Dean, Steven Richards, Johnny Nitro, William Regal, Road Warrior, Joey Mercury, Psicosis

They’re keeping it a lot smaller this year with just eighteen names. Cade and Murdoch are a southern team, Striker is a former teacher who would become an annoying announcer, Road Warrior is our old friend Animal, Mercury and Nitro are partners in MNM (Smackdown Tag Team Champions) and Super Crazy and Psicosis are part of a group called the Mexicools. Also Viscera is now a self professed love machine.

Simon tries to make a sales pitch to start and gets superkicked for an elimination. Conway poses while beating on Richards and gets dumped for his efforts. Funaki gets catapulted out and Cade quickly follows him. Richards is stupid enough to pose on the apron and gets knocked out with Striker getting eliminated a few seconds later. Murdoch eliminates Crazy as the ring is quickly clearing out. Psicosis puts out Goldust in a pretty big upset.

Snitsky throws Regal out and MNM plants Eugene with the Snapshot (elevated DDT) for an easy elimination. The final eight (Snitsky, Viscera, Murdoch and Tomko for Raw, Mercury, Nitro, Psicosis and Road Warrior for Smackdown) have the big staredown with Psicosis quickly eliminating Murdoch, only to be put out by Tomko. Viscera tortures MNM as Snitsky and Tomko forget their allegiance by starting a brawl that no one cares about.

MNM avoids a corner splash from Viscera and actually tries the Snapshot, resulting in a severely sore back. Viscera stacks them both up for a splash and the Visagra, which can only be described as rhythmic thrusting on the mat. MNM are thankfully eliminated and Snitsky kicks Tomko out by mistake. Road Warrior stares Viscera down and the fans chant for the LOD. A big splash crushes Road Warrior and the elimination is academic, leaving Viscera to avoid a running boot to eliminate Snitsky for the win at 9:04.

Rating: D-. This was a horrible battle royal with the speed of the eliminations and the winner really holding things back. I mean……VISCERA? The long space near the end with no eliminations felt long too and really made the match drag, despite it not even breaking ten minutes. While last year’s felt fun, this one really felt tacked on and that’s not a good thing.

Viscera kisses Lillian post match.

Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is set to I Dare You by Shinedown and gives us the required history of Wrestlemania package (very good this year) before shifting to the major matches this year. I like the song but this really isn’t making me want to see the show.

The set is much simpler this year as it looks like the side of a skyscraper and is shaped liked the Chicago skyline, which fits the theme of “Big Time”. The highlight though is a bunch of portraits of various wrestlers around the arena for a unique and cool look.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Big Show/Kane vs. Chris Masters/Carlito

Masters and Carlito are challenging as Big Show and Kane decided they were friends again and easily won the belts. Masters and Kane get things going with Kane using a very rare dropkick. It’s off to Show for the loud chops in the corner but a rake to the eyes allows the tag off to Carlito, who looks terrified. The challengers are quickly deposited on top of each other outside, followed by a big clothesline from Kane. He’s feeling aerial tonight. The referee yells at Kane and in the meantime, Carlito and Masters get the turnbuckle pad off. That almost feels like a Wrestlemania tradition at this point.

Show goes face first into the steel and a double flapjack gets two. A double suplex goes as well as you would expect and it’s off to Kane to almost no reaction. Everything breaks down and Kane dives into the Master Lock (Chris’ full nelson), only to have Show break it up with a kick to the face. A Backstabber puts Show down and Kane sidesteps a Masters ax handle, sending him into Carlito instead. The chokeslam ends Carlito and retains the titles at 6:43.

Rating: D+. That’s their opener? They really didn’t have anything better than this? Kane and Show were pretty boring champions as almost no one could give them a real challenge, which is why they lost to a team of five male cheerleaders the following night on Raw. Masters and Carlito never got as far as they were supposed to in WWE, which is really a trend of the era.

Masters and Carlito argue post match.

Shawn Michaels is ready for his no holds barred match against Vince McMahon tonight. A few months ago, Shawn told Vince to grow up and forget about Montreal, prompting Vince to go to war against Shawn. That doesn’t mean he’s going to take back what he said because he still believes every word of it. Tonight isn’t going to be a five star classic because it’s going to get ugly. Shawn isn’t going to be his 1995 self or his 2006 self. Instead he’s going somewhere he’s never been before and Vince better be ready.

Matt Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Finlay vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Bobby Lashley vs. Ric Flair

Money in the Bank. Matt is serious again, Shelton is Intercontinental Champion again, Finlay is a tough Irish brawler and Lashley is an athletic freak and a powerhouse (originally described as Brock Lesnar times ten). To make it even better, all four commentators are on the match to make sure we never get a second of silence. Everyone goes after Lashley to start as the fans are all behind RVD.

Van Dam is there for them as he baseball slides a ladder into Matt’s face, followed by a plancha to land on the ladder on Hardy. Shelton won’t stand for being shown up though so he bridges the ladder against the ropes and flip dives out onto a pile of guys in a HUGE crash. Flair and Finlay are left in the ring for something that could be very interesting. Ric quickly dispatches him and goes up but Matt makes the save and SUPERPLEXES A FIFTY SEVEN YEAR OLD MAN OFF A LADDER!!!

Flair is taken to the back so we’re down to five for now which could make the match even better. Van Dam’s Rolling Thunder only hits ladder so Shelton and Lashley handle the climbing for now. Shelton tries a sunset bomb off the ladder but it takes Matt and Finlay to help make it happen. Cole again tries to get the whole Smackdown vs. Raw nonsense in and it still doesn’t work.

With most of the people down, Matt decides to charge at Finlay and a ladder in the corner, resulting in one of them being launched at Matt’s face. I’ll let you figure out which was which. Finlay loads up a ladder but here’s Flair because Heaven forbid we don’t have him around for five minutes. Ric cleans house with chops and goes up, only to have Finlay hit him in the back with the shillelagh (Irish club), sending Flair crashing down to the mat on his back.

The briefcase is swinging though, allowing Shelton to make the save. Lashley uses more power though as he uses another ladder to knock over the standing one to drop everyone again. Rob is right there though, coming off the top with a chair, dropkicking it into Lashley’s back for another save. Now it’s Matt’s turn to do something stupid as he drops a legdrop off the ladder to crush Lashley. That’s not enough either though as Matt Side Effects Finlay off the ladder, followed by Rob dropping the Five Star (well more like a regular one so he didn’t kill himself) from the top of the ladder onto Finlay.

That was a REALLY bad stretch for logic. All of the big spots looked really cool but what sends did most of them make? One of the dangers of Money in the Bank or any ladder match for that matter is doing crazy spots for the sake of doing crazy spots. You could say that they’re doing them to keep other people down, but the logical move, and what they did last year, is just throw people outside and then climb. It made for a higher quality match last year and it would do so again here if they tried the same thing.

Rob goes up now and in the spot of the match, Shelton springboards from the top rope ONTO THE STANDING LADDER and hammers away at Van Dam. Matt climbs another ladder so Shelton steps over to fight him but it’s Rob shoving them both down and pulling down the briefcase at 12:22.

Rating: B. Good stuff here but a major step below last year with too much insanity going around but still more than enough insanity to make the whole thing work. Van Dam is a really good choice for the winner as he’s been one of the most popular guys in the company for a long time so it was time to give him a shot, especially with Batista on the shelf. Good match here but it’s now a spot fest instead of a logical, well thought out match. Both are entertaining, though for far different reasons.

Gene Okerlund is happy to have been inducted into the Hall of Fame (not so happy with his bar tab, because Okerlund likes to drink you see) but Randy Orton comes in to say that he’ll be in the Hall of Fame for actions, not holding a microphone for 35 years. After Gene leaves while rambling about Orton’s old man, Batista comes up and says the title is being kept warm for him. He’ll be back soon.

It’s Hall of Fame time with the Class of 2006 consisting of Gene Okerlund, Sensational Sherri, Tony Atlas, Verne Gagne, William Perry (Celebrity inductee in some rather ugly street clothes. He couldn’t bring a suit?), the Blackjacks, Eddie Guerrero (accepted by Vickie to the loudest ovation of the group) and Bret Hart, who is still a few years away from appearing on WWE TV. Eddie would have been in one day and the reaction he gets here brings a smile to my face, even though I wasn’t a huge fan.

US Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Chris Benoit

Benoit is defending and there isn’t much of a story here other than JBL wants the title and they tried to break each other’s hands (with only Benoit succeeding). In a really cool entrance, the ramp raises up and JBL’s limo comes out from underneath it to deliver him to the ring. JBL even Texas Two Steps to the ring with image consultant Jillian Hall (a good looking blonde) accompanying him. This is quite the drop down the card for both guys, though it’s not quite King Kong Bundy levels of bad.

JBL runs him over to start but has to block the Crossface. Benoit fires off some chops in the corner but the Sharpshooter doesn’t work either. Back up and Benoit chops him in the chest so JBL kicks him in the face. Chris still doesn’t let up and rolls some Germans, only to get crotched going for the Swan Dive. To make sure you know who the villain is here, JBL mocks Eddie’s signature dance (Benoit inducted Eddie into the Hall of Fame) before superplexing Benoit down for a delayed two.

Now it’s time for Three Amigos from JBL which is such an awesome piece of heel work. Jillian yells for some reason and we hit a chinlock on the champion. Benoit fights up and shows us the real way to do the Three Amigos (for those of you going to wrestling school by correspondence, though Benoit doesn’t have Eddie’s roll down just yet), followed by a big Swan Dive for two. Therefore it’s time for the Crossface but JBL rolls over and grabs the rope for the pin and the title at 9:44.

Rating: D+. Really good heel stuff from JBL aside, this felt like it was missing the middle. Instead of building to something, it felt like they ran out of time and just went straight to the finish. I do really like JBL’s heel actions but that doesn’t lead to being good between the bells. Benoit was his normal self here, which may be a step down from last year but it’s still good stuff.

We recap Edge vs. Mick Foley. Edge had cashed in the first Money in the Bank briefcase to steal Cena’s Raw World Title but he dropped it back to Cena three weeks later with Foley as guest referee. Therefore Edge wanted revenge at Wrestlemania, teasing Foley with the Wrestlemania moment performance. Foley accepted if they could make it hardcore, which Edge accepted by giving him a Conchairto (crushing Foley’s head between two chairs). This only woke up the hardcore legend inside Foley and the war was on.

Joey Styles, the voice of ECW, takes over for JR.

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Hardcore. Lawler’s reaction to Lita’s (now with Edge) look: “Whoa.” The cargo pants, Edge vest and bra look does have merit. Edge has a baseball bat and Foley’s flannel shirt is buttoned up for some reason. The bat misses to start and Foley bulldogs him down, followed by putting him in the Tree of Woe for a running ax handle to the face. Lita throws in some weapons to crack Foley upside the head.

The spear connects but Edge rolls away in pain, because Foley had barbed wire wrapped around his waist. The gray flannel comes off and NOW we get the classic red. Edge gets tied up in the ropes and it’s time for Barbie, the baseball bat wrapped in barbed wire. Edge is already bleeding from the arm but he’s able to hiptoss Foley into the steps for another sick crash. A baseball slide knocks Foley’s broken body back to the floor and of course it’s table time.

Foley rolls off the table before Edge can drop a top rope splash. That’s fine with Edge who slams Foley head first onto the steel ramp for two. That sound made me cringe….and so does Edge covering Foley in lighter fluid. It wakes Foley up though and he grabs a piledriver for two. Lita breaks up a Conchairto (well a Conchair-cookie sheeto) and Edge gets even more violent with a Barbie shot to the face, followed by just raking the wire over Mick’s forehead (ala Cactus Jack vs. HHH in 2000).

Edge is getting frustrated so he turns over more steps to reveal a bag of thumbtacks. Foley escapes and throws Edge into the tacks instead, sending Edge into shock. A barbed wire Socko appears (ok that’s awesome) and Edge is bleeding from the mouth. Shots to the ribs and head make it even worse and my goodness Edge is gushing.

In perhaps the scariest part of the match, Foley gets the lighter fluid. There is no way this can end well. The table is covered in it but Lita hits Foley in the knee with Barbie…..and lights the table on fire. Edge spears Foley through the ropes and through the fire, sending both men into shock. With Foley rolling around, Edge gets an arm over his chest for the pin at 14:37.

Rating: A. This is the kind of violence that they needed to have and the last shots with both guys in shock and rolling around in agony from the fire more than sold the whole thing. Foley is the perfect choice to bring in for something like this as this is the match that really made Edge. Yeah he was a big deal already, but this showed his mean streak for a change, which is one of the big steps up to the main event. This is the only match people remember from this show and it holds up very, very well.

Booker T. is trying to calm down his wife Sharmell over their handicap match against the Boogeyman (exactly what he sounds like). Sharmell thinks Booker attracts freaks but Booker says no and they walk down the hall. I think you know what’s coming. First up they run into Paul Burchill, who is embracing his family’s history as a pirate. After he calls them mateys, they find Ted DiBiase offering to pay Eugene money if he can bounce a basketball 100 times, only to kick the ball away at 99 (an old trick of his, once tried on Rob Van Dam himself when he was a kid).

Snitsky is kissing Mae Young’s feet (again, a thing of his), followed by Goldust dressed as Oprah Winfrey. Goldust gives him a pep talk, telling him to embrace his inner freak to defeat the Boogeyman. The real advice is to take the worms from Boogeyman’s mouth (Yeah he eats worms. Like, real live worms). Goldust whispers something in Booker’s ears and freaks him out even worse, sending Booker off for his match. These cameos would become a tradition.

Some fans won a contest to come to Wrestlemania, plus free Snickers.

Booker T./Sharmell vs. Boogeyman

Booker and Sharmell are terrified and we might be in for a comedy match here. This match has been a long time in the making as Booker keeps faking injuries so he can avoid fighting Boogeyman but it finally happens here. Sharmell has to start, only to have Booker get in a cheap shot and tag in a few seconds later.

There’s a bunch of fog in the ring from Boogeyman’s entrance as Booker superkicks him down. The Book End gets two and Boogeyman reaches into his pocket to pull out a bunch of worms. As you do. He eats the worms and kisses them into Sharmell’s mouth, sending her running in terror. A chokebomb puts Booker away at 3:54.

Rating: F. Booker is a former World Champion and would win his first World Title in WWE about four months after this. For some reason, he’s losing in a gross comedy match to a guy named the Boogeyman. Like I said: this was a very strange time for the company and this is a very good example of why. Also, was there any reason that this wasn’t one on one?

We recap Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus (good again and in the same reign with the Women’s Title from last year). Mickie debuted a few months ago as an obsessed fan who had a big crush on Trish. That was too much for Trish who told her to calm down, earning her a kick to the head and shouts of “DO YOU LOVE ME NOW” from Mickie. It got even worse as Mickie kidnapped Trish’s friend Ashley and laid out Trish during the save attempt, ending with a kiss to the unconscious Trish.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending. Lawler thinks Mickie is crazy but JR says Lawler would date her anyway, even if she’s a bit old for Jerry (JR: “She’s in her early 20s.” Lawler: “Can she cook?”). Mickie slaps her in the back of the head to start so Trish elbows her right in the jaw. The Thesz press (JR: “Maybe the Louise Thesz press.”) has Mickie in more trouble and Trish throws her down, only to have Mickie land in the splits. Trish kicks the post by mistake and Mickie wraps it around the post, followed by dropkicking it out for two.

The fans are behind Mickie as I guess they don’t go for the talented blonde bombshell look. There’s a half crab to stay on the leg before Mickie wraps it up in the ropes and stomps down on it. Now it’s a LET’S GO MICKIE chant and the fans boo as Trish comes back with a headscissors. Even JR isn’t sure why Trish is being booed so badly, though it could be the whole gorgeous brunette in a very short skirt which keeps flying up and down thing. Mickie’s hurricanrana out of the corner is countered with a sweet sitout powerbomb.

The Stratusfaction (springboard bulldog) is broken up with a grab between the legs, followed by Mickie licking her hand (edited out of most DVD versions). Trish blasts her in the face with a forearm and tries the Stratusfaction but the knee gives out (this is also edited though it might have been a bad attempt at selling the knee injury instead of a botch), allowing Mickie to kick her in the head for the pin and the title at 8:49. JR gets in a great line with “the nutjob has won the title.”

Rating: B-. Good stuff here with an actual story and two women who can actually work a match instead of models who have no idea what they’re doing. These two had a good, long feud with Mickie eventually becoming the new face of the division due to Trish and Lita retiring later in the year. This is still one of the best Divas matches ever and pretty easily the best of this era.

Vince is with the other three McMahons and decides to lead them in a prayer. Vince: “God, I don’t like you and you don’t like me.” He brags about his physique and wealth before promising to destroy God’s favorite wrestler tonight.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Casket match. Henry destroyed Undertaker AS NO ONE HAD DONE BEFORE to set this up. This was rumored to be Angle vs. Undertaker but why do something awesome when you can do something boring? At least we get the full druid entrance for the casket, plus the classic story of “I’m not scared of the dark” from Henry. I say classic because EVERY HEEL EVER SAYS THAT TO UNDERTAKER. Undertaker’s entrance goes so long that Cole is able to go through every match in the Streak.

Henry jumps Undertaker during the nearly three minute entrance and pounds him down using big clubbing blows. Yes I said BIG CLUBBING BLOWS. Undertaker tries running him over but a clothesline puts him right back down. They head outside with both guys going into the steps. Slow progress so far. Back in and Henry breaks up Old School and chokes Undertaker near the open casket.

Anything goes though so Undertaker hits him low for the break. Old School works the second time around and Henry misses a charge, sending him down into the casket. Undertaker joins him and they choke each other a lot until Henry gets punched back into the ring. Isn’t that bad strategy for Undertaker? There’s the World’s Strongest Slam and Henry covers out of instinct.

Another trip to the casket goes nowhere so Henry pounds away with even more right hands. Since those don’t work well enough, Mark goes to the middle rope and gets powerbombed down. Not quite the Last Ride but it’s as close as Undertaker was going to get with Henry. Mark is sent to the floor and takes the Taker Dive, followed by a Tombstone to put him in the casket for the win at 9:27.

Rating: D-. This was as going through the motions as you were going to get with neither guy looking like they were trying with any sort of effort. That being said though, if you were scheduled to get Kurt Angle and got Mark Henry instead, how fired up would you be? Bad match here as it was nearly nine minutes of punching and forearms until the ending.

We recap Vince vs. Shawn which I covered earlier. After the grow up line set him off, Vince sent Shane and the Spirit Squad (five male cheerleaders in an odd gimmick choice) after Shawn and even forced him to join his special club. As in the one that involved Vince lower his pants and a kiss from the other person. Figure out the details for yourself.

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

No holds barred. JR apologizes in advance for being so biased in this match. Oh thanks for the warning Jimmy. Vince shows off a framed cover of his Muscle and Fitness Magazine cover, which really is amazing considering he’s 60 here. Shawn doesn’t want to wait and sends Vince over the table, choking him with an electric cord. The fans want Bret (maybe he could pick this show up a bit) but have to settle for the framed picture (minus the glass) going around Vince’s head.

Cue the Spirit Squad to take Shawn out, including their five man lifting slam. Nicky (later known as Dolph Ziggler and the only one who went anywhere) sends Kenny to the top for a guillotine legdrop but Shawn moves away. Their megaphone goes upside the Squad’s heads and Kenny is sent flying over the top onto the rest of the team.

Vince finally gets back into it with shoulders and choking, first with hands and then with the belt. See? He’s versatile! Vince is all fired up and runs around in a circle before tuning up the band. JR: “He can’t carry a tune.” The kick is caught though and it’s the forearm into the nipup. That means it’s time for Vince to get whipped with his own belt (oh the irony) as JR is even more annoying than usual, ranting about how Vince is a businessman with no heart.

Shane comes in with a kendo stick to break up the real Sweet Chin Music and pulls out some handcuffs. Vince would rather lower his pants though, only to have Shawn hit Shane in the ribs and send him face first into his dad. This is one of those moments that makes you embarrassed to be a wrestling fan but you have to expect it from Vince. Now Shane gets cuffed to the middle rope and Shawn takes the key away for safekeeping and even mocks Shane’s trademark dance. He was always good at that thing.

Back in and Shawn hits a GREAT chair shot to the head (Lawler: “CUBS WIN! CUBS WIN!”) to bust the boss open. Sweet Chin Music is canceled because Shawn would rather pull out a ladder. The top of said ladder goes into Vince’s face and this year it’s JR making the Home Depot joke. That’s still not enough for the superkick though as Shawn would rather bring in three trashcans. Oh and a table of course. You can see another can, ladder and table in case we have another wild brawl later.

Some can shots are followed by Shawn putting Vince on the table and climbing the ladder. That’s not enough though so Shawn climbs down and pulls out the big ladder for the elbow (after some crotch chops) through a trashcan through Vince. Sweet Chin Music FINALLY puts Vince away at 18:27.

Rating: D. This went on WAY too long as the last six or seven minutes were just Shawn beating Vince up with no offense from McMahon whatsoever. It’s entertaining in a perverse violent way but at the same time, how long can you see Shawn hit Vince with various metal objects before it gets dull? Even JR was saying end it already. Cut out five minutes of this and it’s way better as this was six minutes longer than Money in the Bank. That’s too much no matter how you look at it. On top of that, this led to a DX reunion and a one sided feud that went on for another five months, even after this total destruction.

Vince flips Shawn off from the stretcher in a perfect touch.

Wrestlemania XXIII is in Detroit.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. Rey Mysterio had dedicated his Royal Rumble performance to the late Eddie Guerrero, last eliminating Randy Orton to win. Orton wasn’t happy with this and played on Rey’s emotions by bringing up Eddie’s name and saying he would burn forever. This made Rey put his title shot on the line at No Way Out 2006 where Orton defeated him. Smackdown General Manager Teddy Long put Mysterio into the title match anyway to make it a triple threat against champion Kurt Angle (who won the vacant title in a battle royal due to Batista’s injury). This gets the music video treatment.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

Angle is defending and P.O.D. plays Mysterio to the ring. No superhero again this year as Rey has an Aztec eagle theme instead. Orton takes the belt from the referee to blast Kurt in the face and runs Rey over for two. Kurt, in black boots for some reason, comes back in with a German suplex to both guys at once. Rey is down so Randy has to take Kurt’s full wrath. This was a great period for Angle as he was on fire and really feeling the Wrestling Machine persona.

The ankle lock attempt is abandoned as Angle has to deal with Mysterio, who headscissors him to the middle rope. This time the ankle lock goes on though as Kurt counters the 619 but Orton gets on the apron with a chair so the referee doesn’t see Rey tap (what a hero: giving up five minutes in when he’s trying to honor his friend’s memory). Now it’s time to unleash the Germans with Angle not even leaving his feet as he throws Mysterio.

An Angle Slam puts Rey on the floor and now Randy gets caught in the hold to make him tap behind the referee’s back. Rey comes back in with a springboard legdrop for two on the champ but he sends Mysterio shoulder first into the post. An RKO out of nowhere (he even did it back then) gets two on Kurt with the ankle delaying the cover. Ever the rocket scientist, Orton goes up top on a bad ankle against Kurt Angle, who gladly runs up the corner for the belly to belly superplex.

Rey’s springboard seated senton gets two on Angle and Randy throws the champ to the floor. His powerbomb into a neckbreaker (a cool move I wish he would use more often) gets two on Rey but a quick Angle Slam gets the same on Orton. Rey armdrags the champ to the floor and it’s the 619 and West Coast Pop to pin Orton for the title at 9:25.

Rating: C+. Where’s the rest of the match? The World Title change at Wrestlemania can’t even get ten minutes but Boogeyman vs. Booker T./Sharmell and the next match can get four minutes each? Mysterio winning is a cool moment but this should have been just beating Orton while Angle fights Undertaker in a classic. At least we had a cool moment though and a good way to cap off Eddie’s legacy while giving Rey a surprise title win.

Vickie and Chavo Guerrero come out to celebrate.

HHH and John Cena are getting ready in the back and JR talks about Cena being defiant like his fans. Fans: “CENA SUCKS!”

Candice Michelle vs. Torrie Wilson

They’ve both been in Playboy before so here’s a pillow fight on a bed. JR: “This next match will not resemble Gotch and Hackenschmidt.” Of note: Torrie comes out to what would become Laycool’s music and carrying a puppy. Lilian also can’t pronounce Torrie’s hometown of Boise, Idaho. They brawl to start and Torrie turns the bed over. There goes Candice’s dress but she still chokes Torrie with her legs while bending over the top rope. Candice drops a knee and cuts Torrie’s dress off with some scissors. She rubs a copy of Playboy in Torrie’s face but charges into a rollup to give Torrie the pin at 3:55.

Rating: F. Again, this got about four minutes or nearly half the time of a World Title match. That’s really their best use of Wrestlemania time? As has been the case in the past, I get the appeal and thinking here but this really didn’t need to be the next to last match at the biggest show of the year.

Clips of the Wrestlemania press conference from earlier in the week. HHH called this the easiest match of his life because sooner or later, they all bow down to the king. He won a quick tournament to get the shot.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

HHH is challenging and comes out first with a full on Conan the Barbarian look, complete with throne rising through the stage, fur pelt, and of course a bottle of water. Just like Kane in 1998 though, his entrance is trumped almost instantly. We see an old newsreel style video of Chicago in the Great Depression. Gangsters were the only people living the American Dream and a group in Chicago lived harder than anybody. To survive, those people needed three things: Hustle, Loyalty and Respect.

The stage rises up again and a 1930s car with gangsters hanging off the side (one of which is CM Punk) holding Tommy guns. Cena’s music hits and the booing gets even louder. He comes out in a black trench coat and fedora before firing off a Tommy gun of his own. This isn’t the best received entrance but it certainly makes an impression. With all that out of the way, we get the big match intros and it’s time to go. Well after we hear all of HHH’s nicknames of course.

Feeling out process to start with HHH grabbing a hammerlock and throwing Cena to the ground. A kick to the back sends him into the corner as this is all HHH in the very early going. The fans are all over Cena with some very bad words so he tries a quick FU, only to eat a right hand to the jaw to put him down again. To mix things up a bit, HHH throws him out to the floor as they’re taking their time here.

A backdrop of all things gets two for the champ as Lawler says Cena might not be the best wrestler but he can fight. JR jumps to the champ’s defense as he throws HHH into the corner and puts on a chinlock to take a breather. Fans: “YOU CAN’T WRESTLE!” A big whip sends HHH over the corner and out to the floor in a big crash, followed by a slam to put HHH on the ramp.

Back in and they start slugging it out, followed by HHH taking it to the floor again for a whip through the steps. Things slow down with the HHH knee to the mat, followed by one heck of a clothesline for two. Back to back neckbreakers get the same and HHH is as over as free beer in a frat house. JR tries to get over Monarch of the Mat as a new nickname for HHH as he cranks on Cena’s head. A sleeper takes Cena down and turns into a chinlock.

Back up and Cena takes his head off with a clothesline and follows with two more. A powerslam gets two and the ProtoBomb looks to set up the Shuffle, only to have HHH pop up with a spinebuster. It’s back to the sleeper but Cena quickly suplexes out and now the Shuffle connects. The STFU (the U would eventually be dropped) goes on but HHH is too close to the ropes. With that not working, Cena tries the FU but gets rammed into the referee. HHH uses the opportunity to get in a low blow, which hits Cena and the referee at the same time.

That means it’s time for a sledgehammer to the face for two, because a 6’4 270lb man HITTING YOU IN THE FACE WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER is only going to knock you out for two seconds at a time. HHH loads up the Pedigree (“I hit him in the face with a hammer as hard as I could. Maybe my wrestling move can beat him!”) but Cena reverses into the FU (looking like he’s been out there five minutes and hasn’t been touched) for a near fall. A high cross body misses and it’s back to the Pedigree but Cena reverses into the STFU to eventually retain at 22:04.

Rating: C. Cena was coming but he really wasn’t there yet. This is similar to Rock vs. Austin back in 1999 where the first match wasn’t great (though certainly not bad) but the rematch the next month was WAY better (partially due to Edge being added to spice things up a bit). The match didn’t work for the most part though and that sledgehammer shot was WAY more than I could handle. I repeat: he hit Cena in the face WITH A SLEDGEHAMMER FOR TWO.

That being said, this is the match that made Cena the biggest star in the company. He had always been a big deal and the top star of Raw, but this is the match that made him special. Until then he had been living in Batista’s shadow, but now it’s all about Cena and his in ring abilities would mature to back it up. The match is good, though much more important than anything else.

Highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show just does not hold up. It felt like something used to set up stuff for the future which is fine, but aside from Edge vs. Foley and a good Money in the Bank, what is there on here of value? We have a pretty lame Tag Team Title match where the titles changed hands the next night, a forgettable US Title change, Boogeyman vs. Booker T. (for all intents and purposes), a good Women’s Title match, a REALLY bad casket match, a way too long squash, a World Title change that was far too short though memorable and a pillow fight. Does that sound like Wrestlemania to you?

Now that being said, this isn’t the worst show ever as they kept most of the bad stuff short. The long bad match with Vince vs. Shawn certainly had some good moments with some of Vince’s head trauma and the sheer amusement of seeing the boss get beaten up. Basically, as usual, this show needed another edit and to have about an hour cut out. If you lose some of the short matches entirely (Booker T. vs. Boogeyman to start. Do that nonsense on Raw.), trim off some of Vince’s destruction and add it to the triple threat and cut the show down by at least half an hour, it’s WAY better in a hurry.

This show fell into one of the most common traps for Wrestlemania: trying to squeeze in too much stuff, including a lot of stuff that really didn’t need to be here. There were eleven matches on the card which really is too much. It made for a lot of short and forgettable matches, plus a handful that are actually good. That doesn’t really make up for a good Wrestlemania, though there are worse. We’ll go with this one on the very bottom of the good list list but with the weaker stuff on here being much more forgettable and dull than bad.

Ratings Comparison

Big Show/Kane vs. Carlito/Chris Masters

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: D+

Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Ric Flair vs. Finlay vs. Matt Hardy vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Chris Benoit

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: D+

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Original: A

2013 Redo: A

2015 Redo: A

Boogeyman vs. Booker T/Sharmell

Original: F

2013 Redo: F

2015 Redo: F

Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B-

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D-

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: D

Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: C+

Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle

Original: F

2013 Redo: F

2015 Redo: F

HHH vs. John Cena

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: C-

In the first one I said it wasn’t something I’d want to see again. Apparently that was accurate as the rating PLUNGED on a second viewing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/29/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-22-i-barely-remember-this-show/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/31/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xxii-hhh-does-it-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XXII
Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 17,159
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

We head to the midwest here for a pretty forgotten show. The main events here are Cena defending against HHH and Angle defending against Guerrero and Orton. No that isn’t a typo. The triple threat has nothing to do with Rey Mysterio but rather is there to milk every dime possible out of Eddie’s corpse. Seriously, that’s it. Other than that we have Shawn vs. Vince and Edge vs. Foley in a match that allegedly made Edge a bigger deal. Let’s get to it.

Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is a Wrestlemania montage set to I Dare You by Shinedown. Awesome song and an awesome video.

We also get the usual kind of opening video with hype for the major matches.

Raw Tag Titles: Carlito/Chris Masters vs. Big Show/Kane

The monsters are defending here. Kane and Masters start stuff out and the 6’5 Masters looks tiny by comparison. Show headbutts him from the apron before coming in legally for some chops. A poke to Big Show’s eye slows him down and here’s Carlito who is immediately chopped down. Masters is slammed down as well with Show throwing Carlito over the top and out onto Chris.

Kane goes up top and dives onto both guys as the challengers are in trouble. Somewhere in between there the turnbuckle pad has been removed and Show misses a charge, going head first into said buckle. It doesn’t seem to have much effect though as Show suplexes both guys down with ease. Off to Kane as everything breaks down. Kane pounds away on Carlito in the corner and hits the side slam for no cover.

The top rope clothesline misses Masters though and there’s the Masterlock to Kane. Show breaks it up seconds later but there’s the Backstabber to Kane. The chokeslam is broken up by Masters and Show is sent to the floor. Kane’s double chokeslam attempt is broken up but after causing some heel miscommunication, a solo version to Carlito retains the titles.

Rating: C. Not bad here but this is one of the matches that probably could have been cut for the sake of trimming the show a bit. The match was a squash and not a very interesting one either. That’s the problem with a pair of giants like Big Show and Kane: there’s no one that can stop them and the resulting matches are dull at times. Not bad but it felt like a Raw match.

The losers argue post match.

Shawn says that when he told Vince to grow up, he was telling the truth. It’s pretty funny that a year ago Shawn and Angle stole the show and a year before that he stole the show with Benoit and HHH. This year though it’s going to be about violence, not the five star classic. Shawn tells Vince to pray tonight because he’ll be enduring quite a bit.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Finlay vs. Ric Flair vs. Rob Van Dam vs. Matt Hardy vs. Bobby Lashley

Money in the Bank here. Shelton is Intercontinental Champion and Matt is arguably the favorite. It’s a big brawl to start with Lashley cleaning house. The crowd favors RVD. Benjamin hits a BIG kick to Lashley’s head to put him down as Matt tries to bring in the first ladder. Instead it’s Van Dam with a baseball slide to take Matt down, followed by a big flip dive to put him down again. Shelton brings in a ladder of his own and after laying out Finlay with it, he sets the ladder up as a ramp for a springboard flip dive to take out everyone under the age of 40.

Finlay sets up a ladder but here’s Flair for the save. Naitch tries to climb but Matt superplexes him off the ladder which is good enough to hurt Flair’s back and knock him out of the match. As Flair is taken out, Van Dam lays out Shelton on the ladder but misses Rolling Thunder, hitting only the ladder. Lashley goes for a climb but Benjamin goes up to stop him. Shelton tries a sunset bomb over the top of the ladder but it takes Matt and Finlay helping to complete the move.

Matt gets a running start at Finlay but has a ladder pelted at him to put Hardy right back down. Finlay sets up the ladder but here’s Flair hobbling down the aisle. Instead of climbing up the ladder though, Finlay goes into the aisle and gets chopped back down. Ric fights off Shelton and Hardy and goes up, getting his hand on the case. Finlay goes up the ladder though and blasts him with the club to put him back down.

Shelton and Finlay fight on top of the ladder but here’s Lashley with another ladder to knock the ladder with two people on it down to the mat. Now Lashley goes up but Van Dam comes off the top rope and dropkicks a chair into Lashley’s back to break up the climb. Matt, ever the bright guy, goes up top on the ladder but drops a leg instead of going for the case. Matt goes up and gets his hand on the ladder, only to have Finlay make a save. Hardy takes Finlay down with a Side Effect off the ladder to put everyone down.

Van Dam, also not the brightest guy in the world, comes off the ladder with a splash on Finlay, leaving everyone down again. In the spot of the match, Van Dam goes for a climb but Shelton springboards off the top rope and lands on the ladder to punch Rob down. That looked AWESOME but he has to stop Matt instead of getting the briefcase. Matt and Shelton’s ladder fall down though and it’s Van Dam pulling down the case to win the match and the title shot.

Rating: B. Shelton’s spot was INSANE but this match was a bit too short. Also the match wasn’t as big with the spots as it was last year but the spots that were big certainly did look good. It’s not quite as good as last year, but it still lived up to the hype. A better roster would have helped this one too, as Finlay didn’t fit in a match like this and Flair didn’t exactly either.

Randy Orton interrupts Gene Okerlund and insults the idea of Okerlund being inducted into the Hall of Fame. Gene isn’t impressed and says he’ll be in the Hall of Fame one day because of nights like tonight. Batista, still injured at this point, comes up and says he’s coming for the winner of the triple threat tonight. Batista vs. Orton was the match that never got to have on the big stage they wanted to.

Here’s the Hal of Fame (minus Bret because pigs haven’t grown wings yet): Okerlund, Sherri Martel, Tony Atlas, Verne Gagne, William Perry (in barely fitting street clothes), The Blackjacks (with a drool inducing Maria) and the co-headliner, Eddie Guerrero (biggest ovation and accepted by Vickie).

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. John Bradshaw Layfield

JBL is challenging and takes over with a quick headlock. Benoit comes back with a drop toehold but can’t get the Crossface this early. Back to the headlock by JBL but Benoit gets his back and pounds on the challenger’s neck. The Sharpshooter is broken up very quickly and Jibbles heads to the floor. Back in and Benoit avoids a charge in the corner and lays out Bradshaw with the Rolling Germans. The champion loads up the Swan Dive but JBL crotches him to escape.

JBL cranks up the heel by doing Eddie’s chest slap. A superplex puts Benoit down but only gets a very delayed two. There’s the Eddie dance and JBL hits Three Amigos to HUGE heat. Benoit knees his way out of the third Amigo and pounds away, only to get kicked in the face for two. Off to a lame chinlock (his hands aren’t even locked) by JBL but Benoit suplexes his way out. Now Chris hits Three Amigos to a solid ovation before doing the chest slap. Now the Swan Dive hits for two and Benoit counters the Clothesline into a Crossface attempt, but JBL rolls onto his back and grabs the rope for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. Just like the opener this was pretty meh but JBL was an awesome heel here. The part of this that sticks in my mind though is Benoit hitting that headbutt. After it hit he was grabbing his skull and was clearly in pain. Every time I see him hit something like that I cringe a little bit more and wonder if that was the point of no return.

We recap Foley vs. Edge. Edge cashed in MITB at New Year’s Revolution and Mick was guest referee for the title change for no apparent reason. Foley got beaten up as Edge accused Foley of losing his edge so to speak.

Joey Styles jumps in on commentary for the next match.

Mick Foley vs. Edge

This is a hardcore match and DEAR GOODNESS I forgot how hot Lita looked in this match. Edge comes out in a vest with a ball bat but Foley comes out in…..gray flannel? There’s a Cactus shirt under it but I didn’t come to Wrestlemania to see Foley in GRAY flannel. Edge swings with the bat but only hits buckle. Foley slams him into the mat and puts Edge upside down in the Tree of Woe for the running fist to the face.

Edge comes back with a forearm and tells Lita to send him something. We get various flat metal objects like cookie sheets and stop signs which are smashed against Foley’s head. Edge loses the vest and hits the spear before falling to the side and writhing in pain. Foley opens up the flannel and reveals a ring of barbed wire wrapped around his stomach and A RED FLANNEL SHIRT! Edge’s arm is hacked open so Foley whips him with the barbed wire and drives it into the arm cut.

Edge is tied up in the ropes and Foley pulls out a barbed wire ball bat. Lita tries to interfere but a Cactus Clothesline to Edge puts all three on the floor. A swinging neckbreaker on the floor gets two for Foley but as he charges at Edge he gets hiptossed into the steps, leg first. Edge whips Foley HARD into the steps, destroying the knees even further. Mick is put on a table on the floor but rolls off before Edge can dive. Edge slams Mick’s head into the steel ramp for two and another sick thud.

Back inside the ring they go and Edge covers Foley with lighter fluid. Well that’s certainly stepping things up. A piledriver out of nowhere gets two for Foley and he loads up the Conchairto, only to have Lita make a save. Edge hits a DDT “onto” the chair before getting the barbed wire bat for some midsection shots. There’s a shot to the face for good measure and Foley is busted open. Edge gets in some psychology by ripping the barbed wire of Foley’s forehead like Foley did to HHH in 2000.

Since nothing else has worked, Edge busts out the thumbtacks. Foley blocks a facial damaging bulldog with a belly to back suplex into the tacks to send Edge into shock. It’s Socko time but Foley wraps it in barbed wire for good measure. Foley gets in a barbed wire bat shot to Edge’s ribs and one to the head as well, cutting his head open something fierce. Now Foley gets the lighter fluid to cover the table, but Lita slows him down with a bat shot to the ribs. The table is lit and Edge SPEARS FOLEY THROUGH THE ROPES AND THE FLAMING TABLE for the pin.

Rating: A. Oh yeah this worked. This was about blood and violence which is something you never get anymore. It helped that you had Foley and Edge out there, as in guys that knew how to wrestle a match and make a wrestling crowd care. That’s the difference between this and ECW: this was well built and about emotion and hatred instead of a freak show. Also it’s ONCE, not every match on the card.

The look of shock on Edge’s face as he goes to the back is amazing.

Booker and Sharmell want to know why Boogeyman wants them. They go to the ring for their match and see Pirate Paul Burchill practicing his sword play. Then it’s DiBiase offering Eugene money for dribbling a ball 100 times in a row, only to kick it away at 99. Snitsky is licking Mae Young’s foot with Moolah watching.

Goldust is dressed like Oprah (they used to be partners remember) and is apparently the leader of this group of freaks. He tells Booker to embrace his inner freak or he can’t beat the Boogeyman tonight. Goldust suggests putting worms somewhere and Booker freaks out. Booker and Sharmell leave and unfortunately there’s no Wrestlemania dance party.

Backlash ad. Hey I was there.

Some celebrities are here.

Booker T/Sharmell vs. Boogeyman

The idea here is that Booker and Sharmell are terrified. Booker makes Sharmell start but jumps Boogeyman to get things going. There’s a bunch of smoke in the arena from Boogeyman’s entrance and you can barely see anything. Boogeyman starts no selling stuff including the Book End which doesn’t even get a cover. The ax kick misses and a forearm puts Booker down. Boogey eats a big handful of worms but Sharmell picks up his staff. She tries to sneak up on him but SCREAMS to make sure Boogey hears her. A wormy kiss sends Sharmell running and the chokebomb ends Booker for the pin.

Rating: F. Do I really need to explain this? Booker would somehow be world champion in four months. I don’t get the idea behind Boogeyman and it never worked at all. This match didn’t need to be a handicap match either as Sharmell didn’t add a thing to the entire match. The stupid smoke was annoying too.

We recap Trish vs. Mickie. Mickie showed up as the psycho (and HOT) Trish stalker/lesbian luster. Trish turned her down so Mickie snapped and kicked her in the head. Mickie then kidnapped Trish’s friend Ashley and laid out Trish as she tried to save Ashley. Mickie kissed the unconscious Trish, sending 12 year olds everywhere into a frenzy.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James

Mickie is challenging and has those awesome skirts that go all over the place. Trish is looking great too with the usual attire but showing her stomach as well. Trish is all aggressive here and chops Mickie down into the splits. They head to the floor but the Chick Kick hits the post. Mickie wraps the leg around the post and is still looking very psycho. Back in and a dropkick to the knee takes Trish down again, as does a dragon screw leg whip for two.

The fans chant for Mickie and I can’t say I blame them. Mickie wraps the leg around the ropes before driving it down into the mat for good measure. Off to a half crab followed by a knee crank but Trish power up and hooks a spinning headscissors to put James down. Trish comes back with the forearms and a spinebuster of all things for two. Trish’s corner splash hits feet but as Mickie goes up, Stratus tries the Stratusphere but gets slammed down for a sexy two. A rana is countered into a powerbomb for two and Trish is TICKED.

Trish tries the Matrish but the knee gives out. Instead she tries Stratusfaction but Mickie gropes Trish’s crotch to break it up. It’s exactly what it sounds like. Mickie licks her fingers so Trish DRILLS HER with a forearm. Trish keeps firing away but the knee gives out, and then the match falls off the rails. Mickie tries the Stratusfaction but COMPLETELY misses the rope, making it almost look like a botched atomic drop by Trish. Instead Mickie hits a lame Chick Kick to end Trish’s reign. JR sums it up perfectly: “The nutjob won the title!”

Rating: B-. This was one of the best Divas matches ever but the ending cripples it. The idea here was that it wasn’t a women’s match but rather a match featuring women in it. These two were beating each other up and Trish had real emotion out there. Mickie was PERFECT for this character and you really felt like she had a screw loose. The sexuality was there but it wasn’t the focus which is nice for a change. It’s nice to see a real story and a real fight between two people who happen to be gorgeous women. Good stuff here.

Vince leads his family in a prayer before his match with Shawn. Vince: “God, I don’t like you and you don’t like me.” That’s where it starts and I think you get the idea.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

This is a casket match and WAY before Henry got awesome. Druids bring out the casket surrounded by torches. Basically Henry has beaten up Undertaker and isn’t scared of the dark. No one on the planet thought Henry had a chance here. I’d bet even his mama didn’t. Henry pounds away to start and no sells a few clotheslines before running Taker over. They trade shots into the steps with Henry taking control before heading back inside. Back in and Henry chokes Undertaker down like he’s not even there.

Taker fights back but has Old School broken up with ease. The casket is opened but Taker kicked his way to safety. The Dead Man gets back to his feet and manages to hit Old School this time but it doesn’t drop Henry. A Downward Spiral is easily blocked and Henry controls again by choking on the ropes. Henry misses a charge though and lands in the casket, only to pull Taker down in with him.

They fight out of the casket and head back into the ring where Taker charges into the World’s Strongest Slam but Henry covers on instinct instead of carrying Taker to the casket. Henry makes the incredibly stupid yet eternally made mistake of pounding down on Taker in the corner, only to be powerbombed out of the corner. Mark is knocked out to the floor where Taker hits hit HUGE Taker Dive to put Henry down again. Back in and there’s the Tombstone, allowing Taker to put Henry in the casket to win.

Rating: D+. It’s Mark Henry and this is long before the career resurgence he had in 2011. There was never any doubt that Taker would win his signature match against a guy who just wasn’t on his level. Not a good Mania match here for Taker, but he would win the world title at the next two editions so he would be ok soon.

We recap Vince vs. Shawn. Back in December, Vince had been talking about Montreal again and Shawn finally said let it go before nearly superkicking Vince. This led to Vince basically declaring war on Shawn, eventually leading to a street fight here tonight.

Vince McMahon vs. Shawn Michaels

Oh wait actually this is no holds barred rather than a street fight because they’re such different things. Before the match Vince unveils a poster version of his cover of Muscle and Fitness magazine, which is indeed pretty impressive. Shawn will have none of this though and goes after the boss, pounding away at him and throwing him over the announce table for good measure. Vince gets choked out with a cable as the commentators lose their equipment.

Shawn cracks Vince over the head with his poster and here’s the Spirit Squad to try to save Vince. They’re five cheerleaders (one of them being Dolph Ziggler) who beat up Shawn with their five man lifting slam, but Kenny misses a guillotine legdrop. Shawn gets their megaphone and beats all of them up while Vince is getting a breather. The breather allows Vince to get in a clothesline and take over for a bit.

McMahon rips off his own belt to whip and choke Shawn but his attempt at Sweet Chin Music is easily blocked. The forearm puts Vince down and there’s a whipping for Vince. There’s the top rope elbow but as Shawn tunes up the band, here’s Shane to blast him with a kendo stick. Shane pulls out handcuffs but before they tie Shawn up, Vince takes down his pants. Yeah they’re doing this at Wrestlemania. Shane tries to send Shawn’s face in but Michaels reverses and we get a very disturbing father/son bonding moment.

Shawn hits Vince low and handcuffs Shane to the ropes. After throwing the key into the crowd and doing Shane’s dance, Shawn pounds him with the kendo stick and pulls out a chair. A BIG chair shot cracks Vince’s head open even more than it already was. Instead of kicking Vince’s head off though, Shawn pulls out a ladder. After ramming that into Vince’s head too, Shawn pulls out some trashcans to beat on Vince with as well.

There’s a table thrown in too and this can’t end well. Vince is placed on the table but Shawn isn’t pleased with the ladder he’s got. Instead he gets the jumbo ladder and puts the trashcan over Vince’s head. Shawn climbs the jumbo ladder and drops the BIGGEST ELBOW EVER through Vince through the table. The Sweet Chin Music is the icing on the carnage and it’s finally over.

Rating: C+. This is a hard one to grade as it’s really closer to a long segment than a match. Shawn DESTROYED Vince here and that’s what the whole thing was supposed to be. Unfortunately this feud would keep going for about six more months with DX reuniting to fight Vince and all his cronies. Still though, it was certainly entertaining and that’s all it was supposed to be.

Vince is wheeled out on a stretcher but still manages to flip off Shawn. That’s so Vince.

Wrestlemania 23 is coming to Detroit.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match, or the Eddie Guerrero Tribute match. You can call it either thing really as they’re the same thing. Guerrero died five months ago and Rey dedicated his Royal Rumble performance to Eddie, so of course he won. Randy Orton told Rey that Eddie was burning, which was enough to get Rey to put his title shot on the line at No Way Out.

Rey lost, but Teddy Long made it a triple threat with Rey involved, even though Rey lost a fair bet to Orton. This gets the music video, set to I Dare You by Shinedown. Oh and Kurt Angle is world champion coming into this and couldn’t be more of an afterthought. He was in Wrestling Machine mode at this point though and was completely made of awesome.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

P.O.D. plays Rey to the ring. Rey comes out in some freaky looking eagle headdress which I guess is a Mexican thing. During Angle’s entrance, Orton grabs the belt from the referee and blasts Kurt in the face to send him to the floor. Rey tries a springboard cross body but Orton dropkicks him out of the air for two. Angle is back in now for a German suplex on Orton before suplexing BOTH GUYS AT ONCE. Angle is amazing, period.

Orton hits his backbreaker on Angle for two of his own as this is very fast paced to start. A belly to belly puts Orton down and Kurt puts Randy on the top for something, but Rey charges at Angle to break it up. Angle instead launches Rey up at Randy who is taken down in a SWEET hurricanrana by the masked dude. The ankle lock to Orton is quickly broken up by Rey and a big kick to Kurt’s head gets two. The fans chant for the 619 but as Rey loads it up, Kurt grabs the legs into the ankle lock with the grapevine.

Orton distracts the referee as Rey taps before finally breaking up the hold. Angle starts busting out the Germans and an Angle Slam puts Rey on the floor. The ankle lock goes on Randy and there’s a grapevine for good measure. Orton taps but now Rey pulls the referee out and covers his eyes in a pretty brilliant move. Back to the ankle lock but Rey drops the dime on Angle to break it up. The fans are booing Rey for some reason.

Mysterio misses a charge into the corner and slams his shoulder into the corner. The Angle Slam to Orton is countered into an RKO but since this is Wrestlemania it only gets two. Randy limps to the top rope for some reason and you just don’t do that with Kurt Angle in the ring. There’s the running up the corner suplex but Rey tries the 619 around the post. I say try because he slips off the apron and has to just kick Angle in the head for two.

Angle is kicked to the floor and there’s an over the shoulder backbreaker into a neckbreaker for two on Rey. I love that move. Randy loads up the RKO but gets Angle Slammed for two for Kurt. The Angle Slam to Rey is escaped and an armdrag sends Angle to the floor. The 619 and West Coast Pop to Orton give Mysterio the title.

Rating: C-. Uh…..what? No seriously, where’s the rest of this match? The Smackdown World Title match with a new champion gets less than nine and a half minutes at Wrestlemania? It was entertaining while it lasted, but there are Smackdown main events that get twice the amount of time this got. Was Rey ever even in trouble in this match? I’m guessing the match got cut short, but we had nearly 20 minutes for Vince to get beaten up? This is a head scratcher if there’s ever been one.

Chavo and Vickie celebrate with Rey.

Cena and HHH are getting ready in the back.

Candace Michelle vs. Torrie Wilson

This is your Playboy match of the year. Lillian screwing up the hometowns is the most entertaining thing about this match. They’re in their underwear and this is a pillow fight. Torrie coming out to what would become Laycool’s music is rather odd. What do you want here? There’s a bed in the ring, stuff is turned over, Torrie wins after like FOUR MINUTES. Remember that: this got four minutes, the Smackdown World Title got nine.

Rating: F. Were you expecting more here? Next.

Video on the Wrestlemania press conference.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. John Cena

HHH, known as the King of Kings, is in what can best be described as viking attire and rises up out of the stage on a throne. He had Thor’s hammer next to him and a bottle of water in his hand which doesn’t quite fit. Before Cena comes out we get a newsreel about Chicago in the Great Depression. The stage raises up and a car from the 30s drives out, complete with machine gun toting gangsters (one of which was played by future WWE Champion and Cena rival CM Punk who we’ll get back to later).

Cena comes out in a fedora and the shorts shooting a Tommy gun. After the big match intros (the announcer introducing them when they’re in opposite corners) we’re ready to go. HHH grabs a quick hammerlock and takes Cena down to frustrate him a bit. Cena gets caught in a wristlock and sent into the corner again as the fans tell Cena that he sucks. All HHH so far. With nothing else working, Cena tries a quick FU but gets punched in the face. After about four minutes of nothing significant, Cena is thrown to the floor, only to come back in with right hands.

A quick fisherman’s suplex gets two for Cena and it’s off to a chinlock by the champ. The fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle and HHH fights up. A hard whip sends HHH over the corner and out to the floor but he pokes Cena in the eye to break Cena’s momentum. HHH can’t piledrive Cena on the floor though and gets backdropped onto the steel instead. Back in and HHH hits the jumping knee to the face to a big reaction.

Back to the floor we go and Cena is whipped hard into the steps. They head inside again for a facebuster from the challenger and a big old clothesline for two. A neckbreaker gets the same as the fans alternate between “screw you Cena” and “Cena sucks.” Off to a neck crank by the Game which is transitioned into a sleeper and then a chinlock. The champ shoves him off and hits a clothesline to put both guys down again. Back up and Cena fires off some more clotheslines followed by a powerslam for no cover.

The spinning mat slam puts HHH down but the Game pops up for a spinebuster to block the Shuffle. Back to the sleeper but Cena almost immediately suplexes his way out of it. Now the Shuffle hits and there’s Cena’s new submission hold the STFU. HHH grabs a rope but Cena is in the zone now. The FU is countered but Cena is shoved into the referee.

HHH hits both of them low and gets the sledgehammer which goes upside Cena’s head. Since this is Wrestlemania though it only gets two instead of putting Cena in need of perpetual care. Back up and HHH charges into the FU for two so Cena goes up top. A cross body misses and HHH tries the Pedigree, only to be countered into the STF. With nowhere else to go, HHH taps out and keeps the title on Cena.

Rating: B-. This is one of the recurring problems with HHH matches: when he tries to have a big epic match it rarely works. Cena got a solid rub out of beating him here but at the same time the match wasn’t all that great. It felt like a way to make Cena a big deal rather than have a match between the two of them. It also didn’t help that there was no real issue between the two of them.

A highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This is one of the most forgettable Wrestlemanias in history. There’s nothing of note on here, none of the matches are great other than a middle of the show hardcore match which led to some great stuff. Batista being gone hurt this show a lot as Cena wasn’t quite ready to shoulder the weight of Wrestlemania yet. It’s not horrible, but it’s totally forgettable and not required viewing at all.

Ratings Comparison

Big Show/Kane vs. Carlito/Chris Masters

Original: D+

Redo: C

Rob Van Dam vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Ric Flair vs. Finlay vs. Matt Hardy vs. Bobby Lashley

Original: B

Redo: B

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Chris Benoit

Original: D+

Redo: C+

Edge vs. Mick Foley

Original: A

Redo: A

Boogeyman vs. Booker T/Sharmell

Original: F

Redo: F

Mickie James vs. Trish Stratus

Original: B

Redo: B-

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Original: D

Redo: D+

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle

Original: F

Redo: F

HHH vs. John Cena

Original: A-

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

In the first one I said it wasn’t something I’d want to see again. Apparently that was accurate as the rating PLUNGED on a second viewing.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/29/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-22-i-barely-remember-this-show/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania 22
Date: April 2, 2006
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 17,159
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz
America The Beautiful: Michelle Williams

Now this is an interesting show. We’re now fully into what I guess you would call the modern era of both the company and Mania. Cena is the dominant world champion, Orton was his evil self, Taker’s Streak is at full power and Shawn is his Christian self. This show is much like 19: it’s solid, but easily forgettable for some reason. The wrestling is good but at the same time nothing jumps off the page at you.

This is also Kurt Angle’s more or less swan song in WWE as far as major angles go. He was drafted to ECW a few months later and after that did little to anything of note until his release and arrival in TNA. Jeff Hardy was about four months away from his comeback. The card looks somewhere between good and better than good so let’s get to it.

An added factor to this show is that I went to the follow up Raw exclusive PPV, Backlash, the next month. Since I remember it fairly well, I’ll be able to throw in some post show stuff leading up to Backlash.

After America the Beautiful it’s the standard history package to start with I Dare You by Shinedown playing which is a very good song here. The recap videos are something that WWE has always done very well. I don’t remember much of this buildup as it was three years ago but the packages help a lot. The theme song here is Big Time which is a bad pop song. Wrestlemania is supposed to have a freaking ROCK song with it, not a bad pop song.

A video runs us through the main matches and I have to think of the stupid Rey main event tour. Also tonight it’s Cena vs. HHH and Shawn vs. Vince. This is one of the weaker Manias as far as cards go if you didn’t get that.
Raw Tag Titles: Big Show/Kane vs. Carlito/Chris Masters

This was around the time that the two giants were just crushing everyone in their paths with reckless abandon. Carlito and Masters were two young guys that weren’t quite thrown together to face them here. As usual the Chicago crowd is white hot. Kane and Show come out together and weigh over 800lbs. How in the world is Kane the lightweight on a team?

Masters vs. Kane to start us off here. This is the first time in seven years that the titles have been defended at Mania in a traditional tag match. That’s kind of pathetic when you think about it. Show comes in and drills Masters a bit. Big chop in the corner makes people say WOO even though it’s a different kind of chop than Flair threw.

Show slams him and steps on the chest of Masters who tags out to Carlito. The Puerto Rican tries a wristlock and is promptly lifted up into the air and crotched with ease. Show launches Carlito onto Masters on the floor. Kane throws out a clothesline to both but lands between them resulting in a massive THUD on the floor but is up first. Total and complete dominance so far.

Somehow the challengers got the buckle off and Carlito dropkicks Show’s knee to send Show’s head into the buckle. Off to Masters now but like idiots they try a double suplex and get launched for their troubles. Kane comes in and a huge backdrop takes down Carlito.

Carlito gets a boot up and that more or less ends his offense. Masters manages to get the Masterlock on Kane but Show kicks him in the face to break it. Backstabber to Kane but Carlito walks into a chokeslam. Masters saves but Kane gets up. There’s no end to these guys. Chokeslam to Carlito ends this.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t a classic but it wasn’t supposed to be. This was little more than a glorified squash and that’s just fine for an opener. Both teams would be split up within a month though as the heels argued over who cost them the match here, leading to the Backlash opener which the newly face Carlito would win with a Backstabber. Kane and Show would lose the tag titles to the Spirit Squad of all people and Kane would begin to go insane.

They began a weird tweener vs. face feud where Kane’s voice would play throughout the arena as somehow not only could we hear his thoughts but they were wired around the arena. It tied in somehow to Kane’s See No Evil movie, but it was still pretty bad. It culminated with a fake Kane, apparently from Kane’s past, beating Kane at Vengeance. It made no sense and was a total waste of about three months.

Masters and Carlito argue post match with the fans supporting Carlito.

Shawn says he doesn’t regret telling Vince that Vince needed to grow up because it was the truth. He talks about how he’s always stealing the show at Mania but not to expect a five star classic out of HBK. Tonight is about violence because tonight it’s Vince that needs to pray as tonight Vince is enduring his own personal torment.
Money in the Bank

Matt Hardy, Shelton Benjamin, Finlay, Ric Flair, Lashley, Rob Van Dam
Lillian in that dress with the cut down to her stomach made me lose consciousness for a bit there. Shelton is IC Champion here so no defense of it again. All four commentators are talking here. Van Dam is pretty clearly the most popular guy here. Lashley is a freaking beast. Flair comes out last because I guess he’s the most exciting one with a ladder? That pink robe kind of makes me think he’s not very extreme.

This is only the second of the matches so there isn’t really a track record. RVD chant to start as Lashley destroys everyone with power. Matt brings in the first ladder but Van Dam hits a baseball slide to stop it from coming in and dives on the ladder onto Hardy. No one is in the ring at the moment until Finlay vs. Shelton goes on there. Shelton hammers him with a ladder which is set up in front of the ropes like a ramp. Shelton gets a running start and hits a big flip off of it onto everyone not named Flair.

Finlay and Flair go up but the ladder isn’t in the right place for Flair. Matt goes up and suplexes the young 57 year old down. Flair is in agony and the referee throws up the X for him. Hey, did you know he broke his back in a plane crash in the 70s? Didn’t know if the first million or so times we told you that got it through or not. RVD drops Shelton onto the ladder but misses Rolling Thunder on it. There are only five people in there still at the moment.

Lashley goes up very slowly of course but Shelton runs up only to get popped in the head. Shelton fights him off but can’t get a sunset bomb to take him down. Matt and Finlay help him out and down goes Lashley finally. Another big RVD chant starts up. Matt takes over on offense but when he puts a ladder in front of Finlay to charge at him Finlay throws the ladder at him for a FREAKING OW MAN moment.

Here comes Flair because he hasn’t been on camera for almost five minutes. Did he need to be oiled or something? Since the ring is empty he sets up a ladder but is stopped by Matt. Flair chops some people away and touches the case. Finlay pops up with the club that no one can spell and takes Flair down. The case is swinging though so Shelton is able to stop him or at least slow him down.

Shelton knocks him down and tries to go up but Lashley shoves it down. Van Dam hasn’t been seen in a good while. Oh there he is with a chair on the top. He jumps off and dropkicks the chair into the ladder and everyone is down. Hardy, the idiot that he is, sets up a ladder in the corner. Oh instead he’s doing a signature move instead of trying to win. What a shock.

He goes up and gets a hand on it, drawing a ton of boos. Finlay makes the save and we’re told he’s not a ladder specialist. Dude you go up. How hard can it be? Side Effect to Finlay off the ladder takes down Finlay, Hardy and the ladder. Van Dam climbs the ladder in the corner and drops a regular splash on Finlay. It’s good that he didn’t do the Five Star version as he would have killed himself.

In one of my all time favorite spots, Van Dam goes up top but Shelton springboards from the apron to the top rope to the ladder to catch Van Dam. That’s simply incredible and beats everything I’ve ever seen. Matt puts up another ladder but he and Shelton go down. Van Dam is alone and is like dude that’s awesome and wins the match by pulling down the case. He would win the title in June but lose it in three weeks due to getting high with Sabu.

Rating: B. Solid stuff here of course but WAY too short to be a great match. This was less than twelve and a half minutes long to give you an idea of how short it was. This was good but at the same time they needed more to it. Also with only Lashley and Van Dam being legit contenders out there it was a bit weaker than last year. Good match though.

Josh Matthews, with a lot of hair, is with Gene Okerlund who has no hair. Orton interrupts and says he’ll win the title tonight. Batista pops up and says he’s returning soon, which is true. Just three short months later he did return.

It’s time for the Hall of Fame class to come out. Bret Hart isn’t here which is understandable I guess. The rest is Mean Gene, Sensational Sherri, Tony Atlas (they’re all accompanied by Divas here if that means anything), Verne Gagne, William “Refrigerator” Perry (he couldn’t get a suit for this?) the Blackjacks, Eddie Guerrero (represented by Vickie who wasn’t a TV character yet) and of course Bret who isn’t here.

United States Title: John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Chris Benoit
No real storyline here as it’s really just JBL challenging him for the belt. In a really cool looking visual, the entrance ramp rises up like a garage and JBL’s limo drives out of it. Good lord Jillian Hall looks amazingly hot as a cowgirl. JBL has a hand injury here. JBL grabs a headlock to start and takes Benoit down with a shoulder. Benoit tries the Crossface out of nowhere but can’t lock it in.

Instead Chris settles for some hard chops in the corner. Out to the floor and JBL hides behind Jillian to take over. Benoit tries to chop back so JBL KICKS HIM IN THE FACE. Why mess with what works? Rolling Germans by Benoit must have JBL wanting to throw out some Nazi salutes. Benoit goes but get crotched. Eh with all those steroids in him the balls didn’t feel anything. JBL does Eddie’s dance to draw big heat and hits a superplex for two.

In a stat that I find almost impossible to believe, Cole says that only 5 matches in Mania history have ended in submission. I had to stop the match and go back to check on that. I found 7: Angle vs. HBK (21), Benoit vs. HBK vs. HHH (20), Rick Martel vs. Koko B. Ware (6), Steve Austin vs. Savio Vega (12-sleeper) Bret Hart vs. Steve Austin (13-Austin never tapped so I’m not sure if that counts), Roddy Piper vs. Adrian Adonis (3-sleeper) and Bret Hart vs. Bob Backlund (11).

Even with Cole being wrong, that’s still amazing. 7 in the first 21 shows meaning just one every three years. That’s either really impressive or really bad. Anyway JBL dances a bit more and hits Three Amigos. Benoit counters the third one but gets kicked in the face for two for his troubles. Off to a chinlock by JBL as things slow down a bit.

Benoit fights back and does Three Amigos of his own with Cole saying “this is how it’s done”, despite Benoit getting up differently than Eddie did. JBL did the same thing Eddie did. Flying headbutt by Benoit gets a long two. Clothesline misses but JBL grabs the referee to avoid the suplex. Clothesline attempt #2 is caught into the Crossface but JBL casually rolls him over and grabs the rope for the title. That’s the ending? Really?

Rating: D+. Seriously, that’s all there is here? The ending was flat out terrible. It made no sense at all and came from nowhere. JBL literally wasn’t in the Crossface for two seconds, and I timed it, before he rolled out. This match felt like it didn’t have a beginning and started at about 5 minutes in if that makes sense. Really not that good at all.

We recap the hardcore match between Edge vs. Mick Foley. Now this is the match this show is remembered for and with good reason. The story is that Edge stole the WWE Title from Cena using his MITB contract. Foley was the referee for some reason during the rematch, won by Cena. Edge of course says it was biased officiating. That leads to Edge challenging Foley, but Foley saying it’s hardcore. We get this.
Edge vs. Mick Foley
Joey Styles is on commentary here as he freaking well should be. Lita looks INSANELY hot here with the Edge vest, bra and jeans. Good freaking lord. Edge has a ball bat with him. Edge’s facial expressions as Foley comes to the ring makes this match already. That’s his best asset and always has been. When he gets in a big match, Edge’s face is just amazing. Foley has his (blue) flannel shirt on so you know he’s serious here.

Styles actually analyzes Foley’s choice of flannel which is a bit odd. Styles really is a great choice for commentary here as his voice just fits this. Edge swings away with the bat almost immediately which gets him nowhere. Tree of Woe by Edge early as Foley drops an elbow on him. Edge gets a shot in and has Lita hand him a cookie sheet.

These shots are LOUD. Foley takes a street sign to the head and rubs hit stomach. Do the sheets smell like cookies? Edge hits the spear after maybe two minutes and is writhing in pain from it. Foley gets up and rips off the blue flannel to reveal a belt made of barbed wire and the RED FLANNEL SHIRT!!! Foley whips him with the barbed wire and Edge is bleeding from the arm.

Edge is now tied up in the rope and the crowd pops for it. Foley hits the floor and finds Barbie, the barbed wire baseball bat. Lita comes in for the save by jumping on Foley’s back (seriously is there anyone she won’t hit on?) so Foley is like screw it and we get a Cactus Clothesline to the floor. That and a neckbreaker outside both get two.

It appears Foley has become Cactus Jack but when he tries a running knee into Edge into the steps he gets hip blocked into the steps which looked awful. Again the knees go into the steps. Does anyone wonder why Foley can barely walk anymore? Chair time by Edge. Sorry that there aren’t many jokes in this but there’s not much to make fun of. Edge hits the floor again and busts out a table.

Foley rolls off before Edge can put him through it so instead he just rams him into the steel of the ramp. That sound made me cringe. Back in the ring now and Edge has…oh blast it he has lighter fluid. He pours it on Foley but Mick is able to get a Piledriver to save his own life. Using a cookie sheet instead of a second chair Edge almost takes a Conchairto. He manages to get up and give Foley a DDT (not) on the cookie sheet.

Edge with Barbie now (is Lita Ken?) and he hammers Foley with it to draw blood. A bulldog onto Barbie gets two. Out to the floor goes Edge and he finds a bag of tacks. Oh dear. Apparently he had a bunch of weapons hidden underneath the stairs. Foley manages to reverse though and suplexes Edge onto the tacks. Considering Edge wasn’t wearing a shirt that was awesome.

Here’s Socko but Foley wraps it in barbed wire. Claw to Lita as well and now Foley has Barbie (make sure to use protection since Edge already had her). Edge takes a shot to the head and is busted open as well. Oh man he’s cut BAD. Foley, the nice guy that he is, rips the barbed wire deeper into the skin of our Canadian villain.

Foley finds the lighter fluid and holds it up like a treasure in a Zelda game. The table gets soaked in it and yep they light it on fire. In the famous spot from this show, Edge dives through the ropes and spears Foley into the flaming table, burning both men in the process. The pin is academic.

Rating: A. They wanted to make Edge look awesome and they certainly did it here. Foley looked great too as once in awhile he can break out a great match and that’s what he did here. This was exactly what they needed and was enough to let Edge get back into the main event. Great match and the Mania moment that both guys were looking for. In true WWE style, they would be partners weeks later.

Foley gets a standing ovation to leave.
Booker and Sharmell are in the back and Sharmell is freaking over Boogeyman. Booker says he’s not a freak magnet. He then runs into Pirate Paul Burchill and then Ted DiBiase and Eugene doing the basketball thing as I mark out. The basketball thing was where DiBiase would say that if a guy could bounce a basketball 100 times in a row he would give them 1000 dollars.

On about 97 he would kick it away. He laughs and offers Booker a chance at it, saying everybody’s got a price for the Million Dollar Man. Seriously people, go look up his old stuff. In my opinion, he is still the greatest heel that ever lived. One more note about the basketball trick, back in the 80s, a young man from Battle Creek, Michigan named Rob was swindled by DiBiase. He eventually changed his name to Rob Van Dam.

He also finds Snitsky licking Mae Young’s toes and Goldust dressed as Oprah. I love these kinds of segments. Goldie says Booker has to accept the freak in him to beat the Boogeyman. There’s talk of worms in mouths and in a place that Booker is angry over having Goldust whisper to him. DiBiase’s laugh takes us off.

Ad for Backlash. Hey I was there!

We see some sweepstakes winners that no one cares about.

Joe Theisman and Michelle Williams of Destiny’s Child are here.

Booker T/Sharmell vs. Boogeyman

The idea here is Booker keeps faking injuries to get out of matches and is threatened with being fired if he doesn’t wrestle. He was found out anyway and here’s your result. Oh and they’re both terrified of Boogey. Yes Booker, a five time world champion, is terrified of the Boogeyman. Booker wants Sharmell to start us off. It’s weird to hear Cole as a normal announcer at this point.

Booker comes in and hammers away. This is about what you would expect: Booker pounds away, it doesn’t work, Boogey dances a lot and Booker still can’t hurt him. Book End hits and Boogeyman gets up at two. Booker is sent into the post and Boogeyman pulls out a pocket full of worms. He has a snack and Sharmell tries to hit Boogey with his staff. She gets kissed by a mouth full of worms and runs. Chokebomb ends this with Boogeyman winning.

Rating: F. If I need to explain this, you’re an idiot. Did Booker get caught screw Stephanie while giving TNA inside information and choking out Vince at the same time or something?

We recap Trish vs. Mickie. In short, Mickie was psycho and wanted Trish. This involved seeing Trish in the shower and kissing her. I think they dressed up as each other a few times also. Trish finally has enough and Mickie loses it. Trish has been champion for like a year at this point so the title change was long overdue. Watching this video, the build to this was pretty awesome.
Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James

The main perk here would be their looks. Mickie would wear these really loose skirts which would often fly into the air. To the shock of no one, Trish looks incredible. It’s so ridiculous to see how far the Divas have fallen today. These girls have personality and are interesting and I want to see them fight after what felt like a somewhat epic storyline built around them.

Trish goes right after her and gets a Thesz Press to take her down. Big chop puts Mickie down. Trish knocks Mickie down into the splits and then kicks her in the head. Out to the floor and the Chick Kick hits the post to set the story for this match. Mickie works the knee because she’s intelligent despite being psycho.

She DDTs the leg for two as the fans are almost ALL behind Mickie here. Lots of knee work here which is the main thing involved in Trish’s finishers. She pulls Trish’s hair and slams Trish’s face into the mat in a painful looking move. Mickie jumps onto the leg and spins around, looking for praise.

Mickie is mixing up her offense on the leg between holds and strikes to it. See, THAT is important. It makes things far more interesting as instead of just sitting around with one thing we get a variety. She puts a leg bar on but Trish wraps her legs around Mickie’s head and gets a headscissors out of it. That was rather good actually.

They slug it out a bit more with neither girl having a real advantage. Mickie goes up but Trish catches her in the Stratusphere. Mickie counters that though and drapes the leg over the top rope again which gets two. Half crab is rolled up into a small package which gives us two and a great back shot. Mickie goes up again but is caught by a sitout powerbomb for two.

Trish hammers away and the Matrish avoids a kick of some sort. She sets for Startusfaction but Mickie rubs Trish’s crotch to break it up and then licks the hand that was down there. See, little things like that get the gimmick over. They set for the ending which is Mickie using the Stratusfaction but Mickie TOTALLY misses the rope and botches the heck out of it. A weak kick to the head ends it instead. JR’s line of THE NUTJOB HAS WON THE TITLE sums this up perfectly.

Rating: B. This would have been an A if not for the finish. I’m not sure which is better: the tiny outfits and how sexy both were in them or the fact that this was really a great match. The botch at the end almost kills this though, but aside from that it’s great and one of the best women’s matches I’ve ever seen. More importantly than anything though: I cared about it because there was an interesting storyline with developed characters. DO THAT MORE OFTEN!
All four McMahons are in the back and they pray. What do you really expect here?

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

This match came about after Henry was for some reason pushed as top heel on Smackdown, feuding with Angle for the title. Angle beat him clean at the Rumble and then Taker had Angle beat for the title on Smackdown but Henry attacked the dead man. Taker than challenged Henry to a Casket Match for some reason and we get this. No buildup video for this either as they’re not even trying to convince us the Streak is in jeopardy. Henry is of course not afraid of the dark.

Taker gets the big entrance with the druids. Oh wait that’s just for the casket. Hey we do get a brief recap. I see why it didn’t get a full one. Daivari is Henry’s manager at this point but isn’t here. This would lead to the debut of Great Khali. Henry jumps Taker during his entrance, more or less sealing his fate. Taker gets a big boot and clothesline but can’t take Henry down.

Clothesline by Henry shifts momentum a bit. Can you believe that this is the same guy that was able to have classics with Shawn and then on the other hand you have Henry who had been there ten years at this point and has gotten worse after starting bad? If you can’t tell I’m trying to not have to talk about the match. Henry goes into the steps, Taker goes into the steps, Old School is blocked and the casket is open.

No one in the world thought Henry had a chance here and the fans are more or less accepting that. When Henry is on offense there’s no heat at all. Taker gets a boot to the shoulder and hammers away on it. Old School hits this time and Henry still won’t go down. Taker tries a Downward Spiral but is blocked, drawing a Henry Sucks chant.

Henry goes after Taker but misses, landing in the casket. Taker winds up in there also and they fight in there for a bit. Taker reaches up and chokes away as this is already needing to end. Back in the ring with Taker striking but he jumps into the World’s Strongest Slam for no cover as Henry isn’t that intelligent. Taker stands up in the casket and gets out rather easily.

Taker gets beaten down in the corner and then like the moron that he is, Henry climbs up to pound down punches. When do you see Taker try cross bodies or Henry do that? Not a fan of moves like those. Taker doesn’t get a Last Ride but more or less falls forward to put Henry down. Henry goes onto the casket so Taker dives over it to take him down. Tombstone in the ring and the ending is academic.

Rating: D. This was bad for one simple reason: there was no drama to it at all. Taker matches at Mania can work very well but at the same time there are matches where there’s no point to him being there, such as this one. I mean dude, Mark Henry? This was a joke and everyone knew it. Boring match and nothing happened at all.

There’s a Divas Lingerie show coming up or something.

We recap Shawn vs. Vince. There was a Raw in Montreal and Shawn apologized to the fans, who kind of accepted it. Vince comes out and laughs about it. Shawn says he needs to grow up, then throws a super kick at him, intentionally missing by as little a margin as he can. This launched a feud which mainly consisted of Vince trying to get Shawn hurt.

Marty Jannetty returned to try to help Shawn but was fired after something like two weeks. Shane faced Shawn on SNME in a street fight and they redid the Montreal finish. Somewhere in there Shawn was forced to kiss up to Vince. It was an ok feud but nothing great. The blowoff was supposed to be here, so let’s take a look. This was supposed to be Bret but he didn’t do it for four years.

Shawn Michaels vs. Vince McMahon

Shawn comes out first which is kind surprising. Vince is demonic according to JR as he comes out. McMahon is very proud of his physique and can you blame him? He has a framed cover of his Muscle and Fitness magazine at ringside which might as well have an X on the middle for the part that goes on his head. Shawn goes straight to the floor and we head to the tables quickly.

JR loses his headset which makes this match more enjoyable. Shawn grabs the framed cover and cracks it over Vince’s head. JR is completely one sided here because of Vince treating him badly over the years or something. The Spirit Squad hits the ring to make it 6-1. Who would have thought that Dolph Ziggler (Nicky!) would be a world champion before Shawn?

They hit their finisher which is where they all grab the other guy and throw him into the air as high as they can. Kenny misses a guillotine legdrop and Mikey grabs the bullhorn which is applied to the sides of their heads. Vince is able to recuperate during that time and hammers away a bit. Off comes the belt and the whipping begins.

Vince sets for Sweet Chin Music which is caught. Maybe he should have tuned up with a little Stand Back before he did that. Shawn fires away with the forearm and nip up so he can whip Vince a bit. Top rope elbow hits and it’s time to Tune Up the Band. Cue Shane with a kendo stick to crack Shawn in the head.

With Shane standing guard, Vince takes down his own pants. Yep it’s time for the kissing spot but Shawn gets his momentum back and sends Shane’s face into his dad’s back. Shawn pulls handcuffs out of somewhere (Vince maybe?) and ties Shane to the rope. After doing Shane’s dance, Shawn beats the tar out of him with the stick.

Chair time and a HUGE shot puts Vince down. Shawn sets for chin music but stops as Vince collapses. Instead he hits the floor and pulls out a ladder. A shot to the head puts down Vince as I think you know what’s coming here. Vince is dripping blood here. Chin Music is stopped again as Vince is almost lifeless.

Shawn pulls out some garbage cans and a table. Shane is still cuffed mind you. The table is set up after a can shot. Shawn goes up the ladder with Vince on the table and then climbs down. He had a scary look on his face before he came down. Out to the floor again and it’s the BIG ladder. Lawler says it’s 30ft high, meaning Shawn is about 15 feet tall. Shawn fires a crotch chop from the ladder and drops the biggest elbow ever to kill Vince. Sweet Chin Music finally ends this with Vince just collapsing from it. The pin is academic of course.

Rating: C+. Well this was supposed to be a beating and that’s exactly what it was. Vince can take one heck of a beating when he has to and this was no exception. Shawn looked great here with the whole letting the old Shawn sneak in as his mind was being affected by Vince. Good beating but Vince had literally nothing for about 8 minutes at the end. Granted he wasn’t supposed to so that’s easily forgivable. Fun stuff but not great.

Vince flips off Shawn from the stretcher which is just classic.

WM 23 is coming to Detroit.

We recap the Smackdown World Title match. Angle is the champion. Rey won the Rumble in honor of Eddie Guerrero and last eliminated Randy Orton to win. Orton went insane heel by saying Eddie was burning and managed to get Rey vs. Orton at No Way Out for the Mania title shot. Orton won and Teddy just made it a triple threat because he could. You knew there would be a triple threat in there somehow. This gets the music video treatment tonight, set to I Dare You by Shinedown. Love that song.

Smackdown Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Kurt Angle vs. Randy Orton

POD plays Rey to the ring which is always awesome to see. This would be cool but Rey has a massive headdress on which I think is taller than he is. Dang it Rey does no one look at you before you go out there? Orton is very cocky here and therefore awesome.

Kurt got the title when Batista was injured and Kurt won a battle royal. See, that’s the perk of having guys like him or Shawn. Got an injury? Need a totally credible main eventer to throw in there? How about Kurt Angle or Shawn Michaels as world champion? I think most people would be cool with that. I would be.

Orton jumps Kurt and the fight is on. Kurt is on the floor and Orton gets a dropkick on Rey for two. Angle gets back in and grabs a German on Orton. Then he suplexes both at once and Rey goes FLYING. That was awesome looking. Angle is all fired up here. Belly to belly to Orton as Kurt is killing it. Rey hammers away at baldie and the fans audibly boo. But it’s about EDDIE!!!

In a great spot, Orton is sitting on the ropes and Rey charges at Angle. Angle grabs him and launches him over Kurt’s head and Rey lands in a perfect rana on Orton for two. Angle suplexes Orton back into the ring and the fans are behind him. Rey gets a kick to Kurt’s head to take him down for two. The fans chant 619 and Rey gets a headscissors to Kurt who crawls into the 619 position like an idiot.

Ok maybe not so much of an idiot as Kurt grabs the ankle lock out of nowhere. Orton distracts the referee so the tapping by Rey isn’t seen. Kurt and Orton slug it out but I guess Kurt gets bored so he suplexes everyone in sight and hits the Angle Slam to Rey to the floor. Ankle lock to Orton and Kurt gets the grapevine. Rey pulls the referee out as Orton taps so Kurt has won twice in theory.

Kurt throws it on again but this time Rey drops the dime to break it up for two. Fans aren’t thrilled by that at all. Rey is sent into the post but Orton counters the Angle Slam and hits the RKO for two. Randy goes up so Kurt pops up the corner and gets the belly to belly. Rey botches the 619 then does it right.

Seated Senton gets two on Kurt. Orton kicks Kurt to the floor and gets a slick backbreaker into a neckbreaker for two on Rey. He sets for the RKO but Angle hits the Slam on him for two. Rey avoids the Slam and sends Kurt to the floor via an armdrag. 619 sets up the West Coast Pop to Orton to give Rey his first world title in less than ten minutes. Seriously, that’s it?

Rating: D+. Seriously, that’s it? The match was ok but for a world title match at Wrestlemania, that’s it? How many world title matches have you seen at Wrestlemania that don’t crack nine and a half minutes? The title reign was awful, namely due to him being booked like a joke but that’s another story. The match was ok but I thought it was clipped as it was so ridiculously short.

HHH and Cena are getting ready. The fans are clearly behind HHH here, openly booing Cena. Ross says most of the fans are traditional as he’s clearly out of stuff to talk about. Maybe a match ran short? LOUD Cena Sucks chant.

Torrie Wilson vs. Candice Michelle

This is a Playboy Pillow Fight and the reason they were stalling I guess. Candice is introduced from the wrong city. JR says the gate tonight is over $2 million dollars. That’s insane to say the least, especially considering this isn’t a stadium and has less than 20,000 people. Torrie’s music was recycled and is now used by Laycool. She has a freaking dog with her. Ross makes my head feel better by saying the next show is in Lexington. That made me smile.

These two had both been in Playboy. There’s a bed in the ring and pillows and all that jazz. You win by pin or submission. Do I need to explain what’s going on here? They’ve in evening gowns, they don’t stay on long, Torrie wins and they’re in very little clothing. We’re done. This got nearly 4 minutes. Yes, this got almost half as long as the world title match. This couldn’t have been added to that match perhaps? I guess not.

Rating: F. Long, dull, and a waste of my time.

We see some clips from the Wrestlemania press conference. Cena and HHH cut basic promos about being champion post show.

No real backstory here. Cena was champion and HHH won some worthless tournament.
Raw World Title: John Cena vs. HHH

HHH comes out looking like Conan’s mostly metrosexual brother. He’s wearing a fur pelt and a crown and a breastplate. He rises from a throne to play up the King of Kings bit. He looks absurd but at least after a few seconds we switch over to All About The Game which is a better song I think.

We then see…a newsreel about the Great Depression? Yes indeed, as we hear about the rise of Capone and organized crime in Chicago. The stage rises again as a 1930s era car comes out and fake gangsters armed with Tommy guns ride out. As a geek note, the one on camera side is clearly none other than CM Punk! Total mark out moment for me there as the gangsters surround the ring.

Even the fans are confused here. Cena’s music finally hits and he is booed out of the freaking building. He comes out in a black suit and fedora which would have been awesome had it not been for him wearing shorts and making the trench coat look like a bathrobe. He fires some blanks (honey it happens to a lot of guys I swear) and throws off the coat to reveal his t-shirt and the main event black shorts. We get the big match introductions which will never get old.

HHH is introduced as the Cerebral Assassin, the King of Kings, the Game, the 10 Time Champion. Cena is introduced as the Dr. of Thuganomics. They even get checked for weapons. That’s not something you see anymore. After a long staredown process they lock up and HHH grabs a headlock into a hammerlock. Technical stuff to start here.

Back to the arm stuff as we’re in a feeling out process here. The fans are all over Cena with a huge F YOU CENA chant. Cena tries an FU early but HHH reverses and DRILLS Cena with a right hand to take him down. Cena has to reset a bit as a HHH chant starts. The Game throws him to the floor as they definitely haven’t gotten going full speed yet.

HHH plays to the crowd but Cena sneaks up on him and hammers away. Back drop gets two. Fisherman’s Suplex with a floatover gets two also and we hit the chinlock. YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chant starts up which is just hilarious at this point. Cena throws him into the corner and HHH goes over the top and out to the floor. Out onto the aisle and HHH wants a Piledriver but is backdropped onto the steel instead.

Cena’s main offense has been the right hand and I can’t blame him at all for that. HHH fights back and chokes away. Out to the floor for a bit and Cena’s shoulder goes into the steps. Now why would HHH let the referee count? It’s giving Cena a chance to breathe and he won’t win the title that way. I guess you could argue it lets HHH rest.

Back in and HHH hits a suplex and Flair knee drop. Facebuster gets a big pop and a clothesline puts Cena down for two. HHH is covering after almost every move or two that he does which is a very nice thing for him to do. It makes him seem like he wants to win every time which is the idea. They slug it out but another neckbreaker takes Cena down for two.

Modified chinlock/neck vice goes on and Cena is in trouble. Cena fights up but walks into a sleeper. He hasn’t had a steady string of offense all match other than a brief one about 8 minutes ago. John fights out and takes HHH’s head off with a clothesline and both guys are down for a bit. Powerslam puts HHH down and Cena is in control.

Protoplex sets up the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. The shot of Cena looking at the crowd before he goes for it is great. HHH gets up and catches him in a spinebuster for a long two. Nice move there. Right back to the sleeper but Cena reverses quickly into the Shuffle which hits this time. He pumps the shoes and grabs the STFU out of nowhere.

In a nice show of strength though HHH crawls to the ropes and we’re not done yet. FU is reversed and the referee is crushed in the corner. HHH throws a low blow and hits both guys. Crotch chop to Cena as we have more DX foreshadowing. There’s the sledgehammer but Cena blocks it and hammers away (no pun intended) until a shot to the head takes him down. THAT somehow gets two.

Pedigree is reversed and here comes Cena. FU hits and gets two which results in an eruption from the crowd. Dang good match here so far. Cena has no idea what else to do as both of his finishers have more or less failed. A splash of all things misses but the Pedigree is countered into another STFU and the referee checks the arm. HHH keeps it up (Stephanie says yay!) but then after almost a minute in the hold HHH taps and Cena keeps the title.

Rating: A-. Great match here and definitely Mania main event worthy, but the problem comes down to this doesn’t feel epic. It’s a great match but at the same time it looks like just another title defense for Cena. This would have been a lot better if HHH had come in with the title and Cena had taken it here, but at the same time this worked fine.

Overall Rating: B. If there was a rating between B- and B this would get it. The whole thing is good overall but there are some spots that make you shake your head. For instance the Booker match, the pillow fight thing, the World Heavyweight Championship match, the MITB being so short etc. It’s a good shot, but it’s nothing I’d want to see over and over. It’s good for a rainy day but that’s about it. Recommended but not incredibly highly.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz

This one is very interesting as the TV leading up to the show has been a cross between boring and really bad, yet the show has one of the best reputations of all time. I’m really curious to see how it goes from such a bad build to such a great show, especially with so much emphasis on Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

Morely and Storm are defending with Morely acting as the new champion due to William Regal being injured. The Dudleys are on the floor in forced servitude to Morely and Eric Bischoff. Van Dam kicks Morely out to the floor to start and it’s Kane diving onto the champs for a cool visual as we take a break. Back with the champs in control and Morely grabbing a chinlock. The Blue Thunder Bomb gets two as the announcers rip on Morely. The Money Shot misses and it’s off to Kane for the house cleaning.

Storm breaks out of a chokeslam and gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl slam for two. There’s the top rope clothesline for two with Morely making the save, only to eat a jumping kick to the face. The chokeslam looks to set up the Five Star but Rob comes inside before jumping to the top. Morely shoves him off, which makes me think there was some mistiming there. The distraction lets the Dudleys hit a 3D on Storm….and an elbow on Van Dam so the champs can retain the titles.

Rating: D+. That’s certainly how you warm a crowd up. If ever there was a time for an easy title change to give the fans something to cheer for, it should have been this right here. When you consider how soon Kane and Van Dam would get the titles anyway, this really seems like a big head scratcher.

The opening video shows wrestlers getting ready with a collection of voiceovers talking about how important this one night really is. This treats the event with a lot more respect and it’s quite the effective idea. It shows that everyone is in awe of the event itself and makes it feel even bigger.

And now, the theme song Crack Addict. So much for the respect part.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

Matt, defending here and accompanied by Shannon Moore, is appearing in his fourth Wrestlemania and often wonders how they did Wrestlemania without him. Mysterio is dressed like Daredevil, starting the awesome tradition of dressing like a superhero (most of the time) at Wrestlemania.

Matt is sent outside early on and Rey busts out a corkscrew dive to take both of them down. Rey can’t hit a sunset bomb to the floor so Matt drops him onto the barricade to take over. The Ricochet gets two as Tazz talks about Matt being off the banana juice and moving to tea. The Twist of Fate is countered into a rollup but Matt grabs the Side Effect for two. As Cole talks about loving latex and teabagging (seriously), Matt misses a charge into the post and Rey gets two off a crossbody.

Shannon breaks up the 619 though and now the Twist of Fate gets two. Splash Mountain is loaded up but Rey reverses with a hurricanrana for two more. Shannon makes the save so Rey takes him down before hitting the 619 on Matt. The West Coast Pop is broken up though and Matt grabs a rollup and the rope to retain.

Rating: C+. This was a good choice for an opener as you want something fast paced but don’t want to overstay your welcome. They were in and out in less than six minutes, which is pretty close to the sweet spot for an opener. Mysterio winning probably would have been the better option but at least he didn’t get the title a week later or something like that.

The Miller Lite Catfight Girls are here. I’m with Lance Storm: it’s nonsense that these two got time and the seven minute Tag Team Title match got stuck on Heat.

Nathan Jones was laid out earlier tonight.

Limp Bizkit plays Undertaker to the ring. Again, Tag Team Titles on Heat in a short match but time for this.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

A-Train messes with Undertaker’s bike on the way to the ring. If I had a dollar for every time a hairy chested man with nipple piercings adjusted the mirror on my motorcycle….well I’d be poor as I don’t have a motorcycle but the rest happens more often than you would think. Show tries a sneak attack but gets sent to the floor so Undertaker can chokeslam A-Train for two.

Undertaker actually leapfrogs A-Train and drops him with Old School as they’re certainly moving in the early going. A Derailer cuts Undertaker off and Show posts him for good measure. It’s off to Show whose chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara armbar. A-Train’s save is countered into a cross armbreaker so Show gets to make a save of his own. We hit an abdominal stretch as Cole wants to know if Undertaker’s stamina is going to hold up after such a long layoff due to injury. We’re four minutes into the match and Undertaker has been back from injury for almost TWO AND A HALF MONTHS Cole, you pathetic nitwit.

A-Train puts on an abdominal stretch of his own and Tazz shows how to do his job by suggesting things Undertaker should do to escape/relieve the pressure. I get that they have different jobs but at least Tazz is saying stuff that makes sense and doesn’t sound stupid. A-Train talks trash and throws some punches until Undertaker mostly misses the running DDT (he was barely touching A-Train).

Running corner clotheslines have the monsters in trouble until A-Train gets in the bicycle kick. Show hits his chokeslam but here’s Nathan Jones in the aisle to kick Show’s head off. A-Train takes a big boot from Jones (because the referee doesn’t understand disqualifications) and the Tombstone is enough for the pin.

Rating: C-. Actually not a bad power match here as I can buy the idea of Undertaker holding his own against these two for eight minutes, especially after he’s shown he can beat them both on his own. The fact that Jones couldn’t even be trusted to wait for people to run into his kicks is incredibly telling and pretty much spells the end of his career.

The Catfight Girls meet Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson, who are standing around looking at Torrie’s Playboy. As various gorgeous women just do. Stacy has a new marketing campaign idea for them and they all leave together.

We take a quick look at the Tag Team Title match from Heat. Add this to the stuff that could have been cut in exchange of just airing the match.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Victoria is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Jazz jumps the champ from behind to start fast and it’s already time for a modified Muta Lock on Trish. Trish gets knocked outside as Lawler thinks this should turn into a love triangle. Back in and Victoria hits her slingshot legdrop for two on Trish but has to powerslam Jazz for two.

It’s back to Trish as JR tries to figure out why King called her a quarter among pennies. A sitout powerslam gives Jazz two on Trish but it’s time for a fight with her fellow villain. Jazz kicks Victoria down but gets rolled up for two, followed by the Chick Kick for the same. Victoria gets sent outside, leaving Trish to get caught in the STF.

With Victoria distracting the referee, Richards breaks up the hold so Victoria and Trish can trade rollups (with Victoria’s tights being pulled rather low) for two each. Jazz gets knocked outside, leaving Richards to swing a chair but hit the top rope and knock it back into his own head. The Chick Kick to Victoria gives Trish the title back at 7:18.

Rating: C. Not bad at all here as they kept things tight and had everyone moving the entire time, including Richards with the chair to his own head. It made Trish look like the one who survived until the end, though at some point she’s going to have to beat Jazz. You can do that later though as this was all about getting her the title and I’d prefer her to pin the champ than the other challenger.

Rock doesn’t want to hear about the people because they’ve been booing him and calling him a sellout. It’s true that he’s a sellout because he sells out every Wrestlemania he’s in. Rock has lost to Austin twice at Wrestlemania but Hollywood has taught him that the third act is all that matters.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Team Angle

Team Angle is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. The challenging team both beat on a champ until it settles down to Chavo vs. Haas. A dropkick puts Charlie down and it’s off to Benoit, who runs into an armdrag from Guerrero. Eddie comes in with the slingshot hilo but they ram heads for a double knockdown.

Benoit brings Rhyno in to powerslam Eddie and it’s already off to Benjamin as they’re keeping the pace fast here. A double dropkick gets two on Rhyno but Haas gets taken into the Rhyno corner for a double stomping. Eddie stomps on Rhyno and gets taken into the same corner that Haas got caught in. Benoit catches Eddie on the top with a superplex for two as Benjamin makes the save.

That’s fine with Chris who throws Eddie into the air and pulls him down into the Crossface for a sweet move but Haas makes a save this time. Chavo and Haas come in and everything breaks down. The rolling German suplexes have Chavo in trouble but Benoit walks into a superkick from Benjamin. A legdrop gets two with Eddie dropping a frog splash for the save. Haas suplexes Chavo but turns into the Gore. Chavo eats one as well, only to have Benjamin steal the pin to retain the titles at 8:46.

Rating: B-. I don’t remember liking this one this much but they didn’t stop for the entire match. Benoit and Rhyno are still an odd choice for a tag team but it wouldn’t surprise me if they were setting up for Benoit and Edge in this spot before he got hurt. Team Angle needed this win and that’s the right call out of the three options.

Torrie and Stacy get in a fight over whether Vince or Hulk created Wrestlemania. The Catfight Girls do the same (though one of them keeps calling him Holgan) and agree to settle this in bed.

King is mesmerized.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho. Chris seems jealous that Shawn is back and getting attention. He’s wanted to be the next Shawn Michaels but now he wants to be the first Chris Jericho by defeating Shawn at Wrestlemania. This has been a long build but they’ve been smart to wait until here for the match. Shawn accepted the challenge with a superkick and telling Jericho that he would see him at Wrestlemania in a moment I always liked.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn tries to fire some confetti cannons on the way to the ring but some of them fail to go off, prompting an “eh what are you going to do” look. Jericho on the other hand just looks down at him in disdain in the perfect response. Some early armdrags frustrate Jericho so Shawn lounges on the top rope.

Back up and Shawn kicks him away without too much effort as they’re still firmly in first gear. Jericho is ready for a leapfrog and slaps Shawn in the face, earning himself a right hand to the jaw and a trip to the floor. Back in and Jericho scores with a spinwheel kick but a bulldog is countered with a good crotching. We hit a random Figure Four but Jericho reverses pretty quickly.

They head outside again with Shawn hitting a nice plancha, only to get caught in the Walls in the aisle. The bad back is sent into the post as Jericho has a big target to work with now. Back in and Jericho yells about how he’s better than Shawn as he stays on the back in a variety of ways. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back before Shawn grabs a DDT to get him out of trouble.

Jericho nips up and hits the forearm into Shawn’s pose, which you just don’t do at Wrestlemania. Shawn makes his comeback (with two nipups of his own) and we hit the pinfall reversal sequence (as required by a classic like this) for a couple of twos each. Jericho is Lionsault for two more before countering a hurricanrana into the Walls. Shawn grabs the rope so Jericho elbows him in the jaw and tunes up the band.

Sweet Chin Music puts Shawn down for two and the fans seemed to buy that as the finish. Shawn teases the Walls but goes with a catapult into the post for two instead. It’s Jericho up first with a belly to back superplex but Shawn reverses into a crossbody in mid-air for yet another near fall.

The top rope elbow gets the same but the real Sweet Chin Music is countered into the Walls again. Just like last time, Shawn grabs the ropes though this time he follows up with more Chin Music for a very delayed two. Both guys are spent so Jericho grabs a belly to back suplex, only to have Shawn flip over and grab a rollup with his legs for the pin at 22:31.

Rating: A. Oh come on like this one needs an explanation. These two were both on fire here and just had an awesome match. It’s the match that made it clear Shawn had more than just a few performances in him as he felt a lot more like the older version here, which is exactly what the match needed to be. Jericho being able to do every athletic thing Shawn could do but not be able to outsmart him is a perfect story in a similar vein to Shawn vs. Shelton Benjamin a few years later. Great match here and one of the best Shawn had in his comeback.

They hug post match but Jericho kicks him low like the heel he is.

The evil referee from Montreal goes to see Vince.

The new attendance record is announced.

Limp Bizkit takes their sweet time performing Crack Addict.

Here are the Catfight Girls to fight on a bed set up on stage. Cue Stacy and Torrie to join in. Girls are stripped, pillows are swung and Coach is pantsed and pinned. Again, World Tag Team Titles not on the show but these girls get like four segments.

We recap HHH vs. Booker T. which focuses on Booker’s criminal past. That’s firmly established before the “someone like you doesn’t deserve to be World Champion” line is made. It’s a better way to go about it but there’s no good way to spin that statement. Basically Booker is fighting for his one big moment and HHH is defending because….well because it’s Wrestlemania and what else is he supposed to do?

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T.

HHH is defending and comes out first for some reason. JR talks about Booker becoming a five time WCW Champion so King says that place was a joke. JR: “How long did you work there?” King: “Never.” JR: “Well I did.” King: “Was it a joke?” JR: “D*** right.” A hard lockup takes them into the corner where they trade chops and some right hands. Booker charges into a boot to the face and HHH goes up top, only to get armdragged down. You would think Flair would have taught him better but if Ric never learned, HHH didn’t need to either.

The announcers bicker over whether or not Booker was born on a pool table which turns into a discussion of Fink being drunk last night. Booker gets sent outside and goes into the steps as the pace slows a lot (yes, in a HHH match). A neckbreaker gets two on Booker and a spinebuster gets the same.

Booker slips out of a suplex and grabs a DDT for his first offense in a long time. The jumping knee and a facebuster cut Booker off but he comes back with a spinebuster. HHH goes up again for some reason and dives into a boot to the face. Seriously they never learn. The scissors kick only hits ropes and Booker falls out to the floor as he was getting dangerously close to beating up HHH and that must be stopped.

Flair sends Booker’s knee into the steps and it’s time for an Indian Deathlock back inside as we flash back to 1974. Back up and the knee is done but Booker grabs a sunset flip for a fast two. A jumping elbow to the jaw puts HHH down again and there’s the ax kick for no cover.

Flair’s distraction has no effect as Booker hits the Houston Hangover, which thankfully isn’t followed up on because the knee gives out again. They stagger to their feet with Booker’s knee preventing him from trying another ax kick. Instead it’s the Pedigree, the completely ridiculous 24 second wait, and then the pin with one hand over Booker’s chest to retain the title at 18:44.

Rating: C+. And there goes Booker’s main event career for the next few years. Aside from being a somewhat boring match, that ending is unforgivable. There’s no reason to not give Booker the title here, even if it’s just until Backlash. The leg stuff at the end was better but this was WAY too much HHH with Booker only having a few hope spots here and there. He didn’t even get the big two count at any point. This was all about HHH establishing that he is the one and only star on Raw no matter what and that’s a major problem. Booker needed this win, or at least anything other than a clean loss.

Long recap of Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon for the show’s real main event. Basically Vince suddenly decided that he hated Hogan for leaving the company ten years ago and testifying against him in the steroids trial so they had to have a fight. This was suddenly elevated to the biggest match of all time despite there not really being a clear reason why Vince started hating Hogan in the first place. If it was mentioned at the start, it was completely bogged down in all the mess that followed. This is at worst the second biggest match on the show and while not surprising, that’s probably not the best idea in the world.

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Street fight and if Hogan loses, he has to retire. Hogan “spears” Vince down because that’s the kind of thing Hogan is known to do. Some slow motion (expect to hear that a lot in this one) right hands have Vince in trouble and Hulk stomps him in the corner. A clothesline gives Vince a breather and he throws those awkward punches. Now it’s off to an armbar because that’s what you want to see from these two in a street fight.

Hogan fights out of the test of strength but Vince is smart enough to kick him in the gut. That’s so effective that they do it three straight times before Vince sends him outside. Hogan gets posted but still manages to avoid a chair shot. Instead it’s Hulk chairing Vince in the head and of course we’ve got some blood (you knew that was coming and you know it’s coming from Hulk too).

More chair shots have Vince reeling, though not enough to knock him out, because Vince is more manly than your average wrestler. Another chair shot hits the Spanish announcer in the head because this match needed additional casualties. Vince low blows him and gets in his own chair shot to draw Hogan’s blood as this is already dragging. And now…..it’s ladder time, which certainly picks things up a bit.

A monitor shot to the head puts Hogan on the table and Vince climbs up, puts his hand to his ear, and drops a leg (which doesn’t hit Hogan but it’s a great visual nonetheless) to destroy the table and freak the crowd out all over again. Vince throws Hogan inside and grabs a pipe from underneath the ring. In the visual of the match, Vince very slowly raises his bloody head over the apron and gives the kind of evil smile that only he can pull off. It’s a great shot too and makes up for a lot of this match.

Hogan hits him low to put both guys down….and here’s Roddy Piper, looking so out of shape that he makes Hogan look great. Piper teases hitting both of them before knocking Hogan out with the pipe (Why this is considered a surprise is beyond me. They’re mortal enemies whose feud was the reason for the first Wrestlemania main event. Why was him attacking Hogan ever in doubt?).

That’s only good for two so Vince beats up the referee, drawing out the evil referee from earlier in the night, along with a regular referee. Vince pipes Hogan again, giving us that flopping around like a fish selling. It’s Hulk Up time with Hulk beating up both Vince and the evil referee. The big boot and three legdrops finish Vince at 20:48.

Rating: C-. I’ve seen this match several times and it’s actually grown on me a lot. The expectations were through the floor coming in and it’s a pretty fun old people brawl. It’s dumb, goofy fun and while it’s WAY too long (you could easily cut eight minutes if not more), it’s one of those matches where you knew what you were getting and that’s exactly what was delivered. Vince’s complete over the top visuals made it even better. It’s not good of course but it’s fun, which is a lot more important for something like this.

Hogan poses as Shane comes out to check on his father. We get a staredown but Hogan seems to understand that he doesn’t have any issues with Shane.

You can already hear Cole’s voice giving out.

We recap Steve Austin vs. The Rock. This is ALL about Rock as Austin is on fumes and it’s not exactly a secret. Basically Rock is ticked off about being booed last year in Toronto and turned into the most amazing heel in the world as a result. The only thing he has left to do in his career is beat Austin at Wrestlemania and this is probably his last chance. This gets the music video treatment but it can only get so far when one person is doing 90% of the work in the feud (not really a criticism of Austin but Rock was just on another planet at this point).

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Writing that one never gets old. The camera follows Austin from behind in a pretty unique shot which works quite well. They stare each other down to start with Austin hitting the first right hands. The threat of a Stunner sends Rock bailing to the floor so Austin beats him over the announcers’ table and whips him into the steps.

Back in and Austin chokes a bit (that’s somewhat out of character) and gets two off a suplex. Rock gets in a chop block to get a breather with Austin bailing out to the floor. The kicks to the leg have Austin staggering around and Rock wraps the leg around the post. We hit the Sharpshooter with Austin fighting to the ropes as you can really feel the lack of fire in this one.

It’s intense but it’s clear that Austin doesn’t have that high gear anymore. The leg is wrapped around the post again and Rock grabs Austin’s vest. That’s too much for Austin so it’s some bad punches and a double clothesline for another breather. The Thesz press and middle finger elbow get two as Austin is getting some fire going.

A Rock Bottom gives Austin two but Rock comes back with a Stunner. Austin grabs the real thing for two more but Rock cuts him off with a low blow. The vest comes off and the People’s Elbow gets two. The Rock Bottom gets the same, followed by two more to FINALLY put Austin away at 17:55.

Rating: B+. I know there were outside circumstances (Austin spent the previous night in the hospital due to drinking too much alcohol and caffeine) but this would have felt so much bigger as the main event. It’s a very good match and feels big at times but when you have the history that these two have, nothing is going to live up to that standard.

Austin not being able to keep up with Rock was a great way to show that Rock was the better man that night and even with the fire not as hot as before, Austin is still worth seeing at any point. This is another one that’s grown on me and while it might not be as great, it felt important, which is what matters most here.

After thanking Austin for what happened (not audibly but he’s since said that’s what was he was doing), Rock leaves Austin for the big hero’s sendoff. This wasn’t billed as Austin’s farewell but it turned out to be his retirement match. It would have been a great way to close the show, but I get the idea of not wanting that to be the case if Austin couldn’t go. It’s a bit of a disappointment but at least he got the big moment.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle. Brock got cheated out of the title at Survivor Series and has gone on a path of destruction to get it back, including winning the Royal Rumble. Angle has used every possible way out of facing him but tonight he’s out of escapes and has nothing left to do but fight. The fact that his neck is being held together by paperclips and duct tape is just a detail because Angle has a low level of sanity. This feels like a major showdown, which is all you can ask for out of the main event of Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Lesnar, with bad ribs, is challenging and can win the title via DQ or countout. Angle grabs a front facelock but Brock throws him off and we’re back to a standoff. Kurt’s headlock has about the same effect but he breaks up Brock’s armbar. Lesnar grabs a powerslam, only to get caught in the first German suplex. Brock pops right to his feet though, sending Angle bailing to the floor as they’re not laying into each other just yet.

Back in and a gorilla press (Tazz: “The vanilla gorilla!”) plants Angle, who cuts off a charge with a boot. A German suplex into the corner messes with the ribs again and it’s off to something like an STF from the side. Angle lets go of the legs and switches to something closer to a Bank Statement. Brock won’t tap so Angle suplexes him with ease. That earns him a spinebuster though, which Angle is crazy to take with such a bad neck.

Brock hits his own suplexes but Angle pops up and rolls some German suplexes of his own. Neither finisher can hit so Angle trips him into the ankle lock. Brock grabs the rope….which doesn’t count for no apparent reason. Instead Angle switches to a half crab, followed by a running knee to the back. Brock backdrops him to the floor, again because Angle is freaking nuts.

Back in and the Angle Slam gets two, which Cole says has never happened before. I find that very hard to believe. The F5 gets two more but Kurt gets the ankle lock with a grapevine. Brock manages to drag him over to the ropes for the break, followed by another F5. Instead of covering though, Brock heads up top.

In one of the scariest moments in wrestling history, Brock tries a shooting star press (apparently suggested by Johnny Ace) but leaves it short, landing square on his head and knocking himself completely silly. With his eyes glazed over, Brock hits a third F5 for the pin and the title at 21:09.

Rating: A-. This started off rather slowly but then picked up the pace to become one heck of a hard hitting fight. Angle did everything he could with all the suplexes and left it all in the ring in what might have been his last match. Lesnar did everything he needed to do (save for hitting that shooting star) and if he had nailed the finish, this would go up several notches. It’s a great finish and the kind of main event that Smackdown should have put on at this point. Excellent match.

Lesnar is GONE as he tries to pull himself up.

A long highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: A. The more I watch this show, the more I appreciate it. There’s nothing bad on the card with the worst match being either Undertaker vs. Big Show/A-Train or the street fight and even those are watchable. There’s also a great selection of top matches, though HHH vs. Booker leaves a lot to be desired. That being said, Jericho vs. Shawn, Rock vs. Austin and the main event are more than enough to make this a classic.

My main issue is still the same: the show could use a breather between all of the top matches. I could have gone for swapping in say the women’s triple threat or the Smackdown Tag Team Title match in between the street fight and Rock vs. Austin, just for the sake of a little breathing room. The way it’s done is more than fine though and it would only have been improved with a few tweaks.

Overall, it’s one of the best Wrestlemanias ever but I can’t put it above or really near the level of X7. There’s some great stuff here but it’s not enough to top everything that show has to offer. I could easily see this being the second best Wrestlemania of all time (it’s in the top three or four at the absolute worst) and that’s some pretty high levels of quality.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Just like last year though, the Rock is in a match that is probably the real main event. After making even more movies, the Rock has gone Hollywood and become one of the most effective villains in a long time. With everything he’s accomplished though, there was one thing that had eluded him: defeating Steve Austin at Wrestlemania, which he would try one more time here. Let’s get to it.

Sunday Night Heat: Raw Tag Team Titles: Kane/Rob Van Dam vs. Lance Storm/Chief Morely

Morely (Val Venis as a lackey to Raw General Manager Eric Bischoff) and Storm are defending. Storm’s original partner was William Regal but he had a heart condition and Morely named himself the new champion. The Dudley Boyz are in the champs’ corner because they’re stuck helping them to save their jobs. Van Dam and Kane are kind of an oddball team but they work well together. Storm goes after Kane to start and is quickly sent out to the floor with Morely following him. Van Dam loads up the dive but Kane does it instead and takes out Storm and Morely at the same time.

We take a break (remember this is on TV still) and come back with Morely chopping away at Van Dam as JR’s audio levels are all over the place. We hit the sleeper on Van Dam but he reverses into one of his own. That works as well as a sleeper is going to work for a good guy so Rob kicks Storm in the face and makes the tag off to Kane for some house cleaning. Kane’s top rope clothesline gets two on Storm and everything breaks down. The chokeslam plants Storm but Morely breaks up the Five Star. In the melee, the Dudleys 3D Storm….and then Bubba elbows Van Dam to give Storm the pin at 10:00.

Rating: C-. Now this one is confusing. Not the result of the match as the Dudleys were doing what they had to do, but the way the titles would change. Van Dam and Kane would win them the next night, which begs the question of why you wouldn’t do the change here for a feel good moment. Storm and Morely weren’t interesting champions so why would you keep the belts on them here?

Ashanti sings America the Beautiful.

The opening video is similar to last year with big names talking about how big Wrestlemania is to them and every other wrestler in the world. This video is really similar to last year’s because a lot of the audio clips are the same, including one from Undertaker calling Wrestlemania a fever and one from Hogan talking about slamming Andre. You really can’t get something new recorded?

JR and Lawler are at a table away from ringside as they were every week on Raw.

The aisle is crooked again this year.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is defending with a completely new character called Version 1. He’s basically a self obsessed motivational speaker who believed in a philosophy called Mattitude, complete with Matt Facts (such as “Matt is appearing at his 4^th Wrestlemania” and “Matt often wonders how they did Wrestlemania without him.”) during his entrance and a Mattitude Follower (MF’er) named Shannon Moore. Mysterio begins his Wrestlemania tradition of wearing a superhero costume as he’s dressed like Daredevil.

Moore tries to distract Rey to start but Mysterio throws both of them to the floor and hits a big corkscrew dive. Back in and the Ricochet (a lifting side slam) gets two for the champ and Shannon gets in some more (Moore?) choking but Matt crotches himself on the ropes. The Side Effect gets two more though and we hit a double arm crank. The idea here is that Matt is barely beneath the Cruiserweight limit so he’s a good bit bigger and stronger than most wrestlers in the division.

Matt misses a charge into the post as Cole is trying to figure out what tea bagging means. A quick headscissors looks to set up the 619 but Moore makes the save, setting up Matt’s Twist of Fate for two. Rey goes to the ropes but gets caught in a bottom rope Splash Mountain (Razor’s Edge into a powerbomb), only to reverse it with a hurricanrana for two. Now the 619 connects but Matt ducks the West Coast Pop. Rey tries a victory roll instead but Matt falls on top and grabs the rope to retain at 5:43.

Rating: C+. This was a simple idea and the match worked quite well. The Moore stuff makes good sense as it’s almost impossible to believe that Matt was going to be able to beat Rey in a cruiserweight match on his own. Matt cheating every way he could and then bragging about being the best cruiserweight of all time was classic heel mentality. I wouldn’t have minded this getting more time but it’s fine the way it is.

The Miller Lite catfight girls are here. These are your celebrities for the show as they were good looking women who would argue over various things and then fight over them.

We recap Undertaker’s partner Nathan Jones being laid out by Big Show and A-Train (Albert) on Heat. This potentially makes the match a handicap match instead of the announced tag, which was rumored to be due to Jones being so horrible that he couldn’t be trusted to have a match on live TV yet.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Limp Bizkit plays Undertaker to the ring. A-Train and Big Show had been loosely associated since the beginning of the year so this made sense for a major show. Big Show tries to sneak up on Undertaker as A-Train is adjusting Undertaker’s mirror. You just don’t do that to a biker. As you might expect, a 500lb 7’2 monster isn’t very stealthy and Undertaker sends him to the floor before chokeslamming A-Train for two.

Things settle down and Undertaker leapfrogs (!) A-Train before scoring with Old School. The Derailer (chokebomb) plants Undertaker and it’s Big Show driving Undertaker back first into the post. The fans tell the very hairy A-Train to shave his back as Undertaker slugs away at both of them. A Fujiwara armbar has Show in trouble but A-Train makes the save, only to get caught in a cross armbreaker. This is an important shift in Undertaker as he was starting to become more of an MMA/power wrestler hybrid instead of using the big power style he had done for years. He would use the new style for the rest of his career.

Show hooks an abdominal stretch with A-Train pulling for additional help. A-Train puts on one of his own until Undertaker suplexes his way out. It’s time for right hands from Undertaker and A-Train is in way over his large head. A running DDT drops Show and it’s off to Show who gets pummeled as well. All three are in now and a bicycle kick drops Undertaker, setting up the chokeslam from Big Show. That should be enough but Show charges down the aisle to meet Nathan Jones who spin kicks him in the face. Back in and Jones boots A-Train in the face, setting up the Tombstone for the pin at 8:45.

Rating: C. Another not bad match here with Jones doing the only thing he should have been doing. The guy was big and had a great look but at the end of the day you have to be able to do more than stare at someone and throw an awesome spin kick. Undertaker works well against monsters like Show and A-Train as can move better than both of them and the offense is fast enough to work.

Undertaker waves the American flag.

The catfight girls talk to Stacy Keibler and Torrie Wilson who are casually flipping through Torrie’s Playboy. They praise each other a bit and Stacy has a new marketing idea (she’s currently Test’s publicist and has named his fans Testicles). Production guy: “Great job guys! Let’s move on from there!”

We look back at the tag match on Heat.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Victoria (a borderline psycho later known as Tara in TNA) is defending here and has what I guess you would call her boyfriend Steven Richards with her. Jazz goes after Trish to start and puts on something like Austin Aries’ Last Chancery. Victoria’s save earns her a kick in the face and Trish comes back with forearms to Jazz’s face. Lawler wants the match to turn into a love triangle.

Victoria gets two off a slingshot legdrop and Jazz does the same. Well minus the slingshot that is. The villains start double teaming Trish with a double shoulder breaker. That ends their partnership so it’s Trish back in with a rollup for two on Trish, who Lawler calls a quarter among pennies. JR: “….what does that mean?” Jazz kicks Victoria in the face by mistake and Trish does the same to Jazz for two.

That’s enough for Jazz as she sends Victoria to the floor and puts Trish in an STF. Richards makes a quick save to protect the title so Trish grabs a rollup on Victoria, pulling her tights partially down in the process. Lawler’s thrills continue as Jazz gives Trish a double chicken wing, only to get sent outside. It’s Richards coming in again but he chairs himself and gets bulldogged, allowing Trish to kick Victoria in the chest for the pin and the title at 7:17.

Rating: C+. Good stuff here again with all three working hard and not being stuck in a death slot. Trish has proven that she can hang with anyone in the division and may be better than anyone has seen in a long time. This worked better than last year’s match as two heels often work better than two heroes and that’s exactly what happened here. You could really see how much Trish has grown as a worker in this one.

Rock doesn’t want to hear from the people because they booed Rock last year at Wrestlemania. After everything he’s done, this is the last chance he’ll have to beat Steve Austin one time at Wrestlemania. Not being able to beat Austin is consuming him but since he’s been in Hollywood, he’s learned that people only remember act three. Tonight he’s beating Austin so he can say he’s done it all.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle

Team Angle (Kurt’s very talented enforcers/lackeys Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas) are defending and this is one fall to a finish. The Smackdown Tag Team Titles were a major highlight in late 2002 and this has potential to be good. Everyone goes at it to start until it’s Chavo and Haas to get things going with Chavo scoring with a suplex and dropkick.

Eddie comes in with a slingshot hilo and you can really see how much he’s matured in recent years. It’s off to Rhyno to face Eddie with the power guy throwing Eddie in to the corner for a tag off to Shelton. Tazz is talking about dissecting lizards for no apparent reason until Benoit German suplexes Haas for two. It’s back to Eddie who gets caught in Benoit and Rhyno’s corner for a double teaming.

Chris superplexes him down for two but Eddie comes back with some suplexes into a brainbuster. Control keeps changing here but there isn’t much of a story going on. Chavo gets the tag but Benoit rolls some German suplexes. Everything breaks down and Shelton superkicks Benoit before dropping a leg for two. Eddie makes the save with a frog splash and Rhyno Gores Haas. A second Gore hits Chavo but Shelton grabs the pin to retain at 8:46.

Rating: C+. Another fun match but for a different reason. As was the case on Smackdown at this point, this was all about the action and a fast pace which worked very well, especially given the wrestlers the roster had. This was a nice change from the earlier matches and entertained throughout.

The catfight girls get in a fight about whether Mr. McMahon or Hulk “Holgan” made Wrestlemania what it is. Their solution: settle it in bed. You can imagine Lawler’s response.

We have about two hours and forty five minutes to go and five matches left on the card. More on this later but it’s going to be a stacked rest of the show.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho. Michaels made an amazing return to the ring in late 2002 and is starting to come back full time. Jericho was happy at first because he had always wanted to be the next Shawn Michaels but realized it would be better to be the first Chris Jericho. What better way to do that than to beat Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania? Shawn didn’t accept the challenge at first but one week Jericho was going through the curtain and got knocked backwards by a superkick. Shawn came out and knelt over him, saying he would see Jericho at Wrestlemania.

Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Shawn has some confetti cannons to launch but some of them won’t go off. Feeling out process to start as Shawn’s headscissors doesn’t get him anywhere. Instead Shawn lays on the top rope because Jericho is boring him. Jericho tries to take him down but Shawn kicks him away and it’s another stalemate. With nothing else working it’s time to start punching with Shawn knocking Jericho out to the floor.

Back in and Jericho starts throwing more right hands but his bulldog is broken up, allowing Shawn to put on a Figure Four. It’s way too early for that though so Chris sends him shoulder first into the post. Back up and Shawn has to skin the cat, allowing him to headscissor Jericho back to the floor. A plancha takes Jericho down but he puts on the Walls in the aisle.

They’re already trading bigger shots and the match is at a nice pace to start. Shawn’s bad back is sent into the post as Lawler explains the idea of a young lion challenging the elder of the pack. We hit the chinlock with a knee in the back for a bit before Jericho hits Shawn with his own forearm into the nipup. As Chris poses, Shawn nips up as well and hits his own forearm. A pinfall reversal sequence gets some quick two counts and Jericho gets a longer near fall off the Lionsault.

With nothing else working, Jericho puts on the Walls of Jericho but Shawn is quickly in the ropes. Jericho keeps up the psychology with a backbreaker and keeps up the story of the match with his own Sweet Chin Music for a very close two. With almost nothing else working, Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but gets countered into a cross body for two of his own.

The top rope elbow means it’s time for the real comeback but the Chin Music is reversed into the Walls. The ropes are reached again but Jericho charges straight into the superkick. Jericho kicks out AGAIN and the fans gasp. Back up and Shawn counters a belly to back into a victory roll for the surprise pin at 22:34.

Rating: A. This is the match where it was clear that Shawn was back and back for good. It felt like 1995 again and Shawn was one of the best in the world, able to hang with anyone they put him out there again. Jericho looked like a star as well and there’s a case that he should have won. Shawn needed a win to reestablish himself in matches like this but Jericho needed it just as much. Still though, it’s an absolute classic.

They shake hands post match but Jericho kicks him low like a real villain.

Crooked referee Sylvan Grenier (who screwed Hogan out of his rematch with Rock the previous month) goes in to see Vince.

The new attendance record is announced.

Limp Bizkit performs the show’s theme song: Crack Addict. As you might guess, this name was never mentioned on WWE TV leading up to the show. This is such a waste of time and there’s little other way to describe it.

Wrestlemania XX is in New York.

Cole and Tazz remember that they’re here and talk about Wrestlemania XX a bit. Limp Bizkit gets a thank you as well.

The catfight girls come out for their fight in bed (on the stage, meaning a good chunk of the stadium can barely see them. Stacy and Torrie come out to join them, they fight, clothing is removed, and Coach gets pantsed and pinned. Did I mention it’s been twelve minutes since the last match ended?

We recap Booker T. vs. HHH for the Raw World Title, which is the feud that was about racism but they didn’t actually say it was about racism. Booker won a battle royal for a shot at the title but then HHH started saying that “someone like Booker” didn’t get to win the World Title. The idea would eventually be presented as someone who grew up poor and had been in prison but make no mistake about it: it sounded like racism.

Raw World Title: Booker T. vs. HHH

HHH is defending and has Ric Flair with him as part of Evolution. He also has his special purple trunks instead of the normal black. Booker gets the better of it to start and armdrags HHH off the middle rope. JR rips on the Fink for being drunk last night as Booker is backdropped to the apron and send into the post. A neckbreaker and spinebuster get two each for the champ and he cuts off Booker’s comeback with a DDT.

Lawler stays on Booker being an ex-con and JR almost does some very bad swearing. We hit the sleeper, which HHH tried as hard as he could to get over as a finisher. Booker will have none of that so it’s a jumping knee to the face instead. For some reason HHH goes to the middle rope for an ax handle but Booker nails him square in the jaw with a jumping side kick.

The scissors kick only hits the ropes though and Flair drops him knee first onto the steps to take over. Off to an old (as in very old, like Harley Race old) school Indian Deathlock from the champ to keep the crowd from being interested. This is one of the many problems from HHH at this point: he kept trying to be Harley Race without realizing that the fans got more bored than angry at him. That worked for Race, not HHH trying to be Race. It didn’t help that he held the title forever and the fans were waiting on the same endings he always used to hold onto it. That’s a very dangerous formula and it went on far too long.

The hold is finally broken up and Booker rolls through a knee crusher into a sunset flip for two. The referee gets almost gets crushed but thankfully stays up to see Booker score with the scissors kick. Booker goes up top and shoves Flair down so he can hit the Houston Hangover (top rope flip legdrop), only to bang up his knee even worse. That means it’s Pedigree time and twenty five seconds later, HHH puts a single hand over Booker to retain at 18:45. Booker’s eyes were open when he pushed himself over so HHH could cover him.

Rating: D+. The match is your standard HHH formula for the time: slow, dull, and the completely wrong ending. This should have been HHH dropping the title to Booker to break up his nine month long reign before he had to lose it to Goldberg later. Instead of losing it here and winning it back in a month, HHH wins again to put Booker WAY in the back of the line as a big choker. Such is life in 2003 though and the fans were absolutely sick of it. It would take another year before this would really change, and even then it didn’t quite work.

We recap Hogan vs. McMahon. This is another feud that really didn’t need to happen but we got it anyway because that’s what they decided was going to happen. It turned into a feud about who made Wrestlemania and/or Hulkamania and then the steroids trial of the early 90s where Hogan testified against Vince. This could go anywhere between a disaster and hilarious fun but it should be easy to figure out which is more likely.

Vince McMahon vs. Hulk Hogan

Hulk’s career is on the line and it’s a street fight. For reasons that still aren’t clear to me to this day, Hogan comes out to Voodoo Child instead of Real American. Vince slaps him in the face so Hogan spears him down to start, meaning they’re in for a real brawl here. Hogan throws his bandana at him and stomps away in the corner to Vince hits him low. We’re treated to some lame attempts at wrestling with Vince working on the arm. Well it’s better than Jay Leno in 1998.

Ever the cocky one, Vince tries a test of strength but he’s actually smart enough to kick Hogan in the ribs to take over. The hold stays on to eat up a long stretch until Vince finally throws him out to the floor. We get to the street fight part as Vince grabs a chair but he hits the post by mistake. Instead Hulk blasts Vince in the head and we’ve got a very busted open boss. It’s time for a fresh chair to go over Vince’s back but Hogan knocks out Spanish commentator Hugo Savinovich by mistake (I never liked him anyway).

Vince comes back with a chair shot of his own….and here’s a ladder. Oh geez this is going to be bad. Hulk takes a monitor to the head and Vince loads up the announcers’ table. The boss climbs up and does the Hogan hand to the ear, followed by a huge legdrop (close enough at least) to put Hogan through the table. That really doesn’t get as big of a reaction as you would expect. We FINALLY get some help for Hugo as Vince throws Hulk inside for two.

Vince heads to the floor and grabs a steel pipe from the floor. He very slowly leers over the apron with a look on his face that is a perfect mix of evil and hilariously stupid. Only Vince could pull that off. Hogan hits him low to survive……and hokey smoke Roddy Piper is here. Looking like he’s eaten Scotland, Piper picks up the pipe, spits on both guys and hits Hogan.

Piper leaves as Vince gets a slow two. Vince goes for the pipe but the referee takes it away, earning him a trip to the floor. Cue Sylvan Grenier to take over as referee as Vince hits Hogan with the pipe again. There’s a legdrop to Hogan and it’s Hulk Up time. Grenier takes a beating of his own and the usual (with three legdrops) puts Vince away at an insane 20:49.

Rating: D+. Heaven help me but I liked this. You have to know what you’re getting here but at least they did enough entertaining stuff. Vince is always good for a garbage street fight when you need one and Hogan is Hogan. It’s definitely not high quality or anything but it’s a fun guilty pleasure as long as you remember that it’s terrible and just have fun with it.

Shane McMahon comes out to check on his dad. Ever the evil loser, Vince flips Hogan off.

We recap Austin vs. Rock. Last June, Austin walked out on the company but came back for one last quick run (he had three matches, two of which were against Eric Bischoff) and one last showdown with Rock at Wrestlemania. This gets the music video treatment, again with Crack Addict. You can see that a lot of the fire is out of Austin at this point and it’s kind of sad to see.

Austin was actually in the hospital the night before this due to his body breaking down from stress and WAY too many energy drinks, meaning he almost couldn’t wrestle this match. He really shouldn’t be out there but he refused to cancel the match. This might have even gone on last otherwise, which would have made a lot more sense.

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

We get the ultra cool Hollywood Rock entrance of a helicopter flying through Los Angeles until Rock’s voice finally says “is cookin.” To go from the superhero that he was to the best version of this persona ever is a showcase of how great Rock really was. Austin looks WAY off here so this is pretty much all up to Rock. Rock loses a slugout and the threat of a Stunner sends him to the floor.

Austin follows him out and hammers away before just ripping at Rock’s face back inside. The brawling continues as they go back to the floor with Rock going after Austin’s heavily braced knees. Lawler: “That brace is made of metal!” JR: “Well what would you make a knee brace out of?” The bad leg (well one of them anyway) goes around the post and Rock kicks Austin in the leg to stop a comeback. Rock puts on the Sharpshooter until Austin makes the ropes, so why not put on Austin’s vest.

That’s too much for Austin so he comes back, only to have a double clothesline put both guys down. The real comeback includes the Thesz press and middle finger elbow. Rock scores with a running clothesline into a nipup of his own, only to walk into a Rock Bottom from Austin. As you might expect, Rock comes right back with a Stunner) and still manages to talk trash as he tries to get up.

Now it’s Rock hammering away but Austin grabs a Stunner out of nowhere for two. You knew it was going to take more than one. The referee takes an elbow to the face, allowing Rock to get in a low blow. He finally takes off Austin’s vest and drops the People’s Elbow for two. A Rock Bottom plants Austin for two and the fans are shocked. The second Rock Bottom gets the same and Rock’s frustration sets back in. A third Rock Bottom finally puts Austin away at 17:56.

Rating: B+. Much like five years ago with Michaels, you have to consider Austin’s condition when you think about this match. Austin was barely able to walk out there and he had one heck of a match. That being said, this was ALL Rock as he had to carry the match, meaning it’s not quite as good as their previous stuff. It’s still really entertaining though and a great way to end maybe the best main event rivalry of all time.

Rock stays next to Austin for a minute and says “I love you and thank you for everything.” Austin has to walk to the back with Earl Hebner but stops to toast the fans one more time. This was Austin’s retirement match and that’s the best idea all around. You could see that it was slipping from him (again, mainly due to the neck) so it was good that he went out while he could still have a great one.

We recap Angle vs. Lesnar. Brock had lost the title due to Paul Heyman turning on him late last year and Angle took the title from new champion Big Show. Lesnar won the Royal Rumble to get another shot, but Angle is in horrible shape coming into this due to his neck flaring up as well. This is being set up as a major showdown between the most real wrestlers in the company and the intensity is all there.

There was a very real chance that they were going to have to swap someone else in (possibly Chris Benoit) if Kurt couldn’t go but he somehow got cleared to wrestle here before taking some time off. There was even another title match scheduled on Smackdown to change the title but Angle held the belt by changing places with his brother Eric.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Angle is defending but he loses the title if anyone interferes. Kurt has that awesome red jacket with the hood on the way to the ring. You can hear Cole’s voice almost out from shouting so much. Brock, with some lightly taped up ribs, comes out second and as Tazz puts it: “Well, here comes the pain.” They get technical to start with Angle getting the better of it, complete with an uppercut to the jaw. Brock finally brings in the strength with a powerslam but Kurt snaps off a German to stay on the ribs.

Lesnar pops right back up with a gorilla press (Tazz: “The vanilla gorilla!”), only to have Angle German suplex him into the corner. Off to something like an STF on Brock and Tazz is actually on fire with the analysis and throwing out move names. Brock finally turns it over into a rear naked choke before just pulling back on the throat. The hold is finally broken so Kurt throws him with a belly to belly. That’s fine with Brock who plants the champion with a spinebuster, only to hurt the ribs again in the process.

It’s Brock’s turn for a high angle belly to belly and a second is good for two. Kurt comes back with some more Germans but neither guy can hit their finisher. Instead Kurt trips Brock to the mat and puts on the ankle lock, which is one of my biggest annoyances. He’s worked on the ribs all match but goes for a completely different body part because that’s his hold. Thankfully he switches it over to a half crab to stay on the ribs. It isn’t likely to get a submission but it can soften Brock up for something else that could beat him.

Back up and Brock sends him the floor before firing off some shoulders into the spine. That earns him a release German suplex for two and an Angle Slam for the same. The F5 gets two more but Kurt grabs the ankle lock, complete with the grapevine. Brock crawls over to the ropes, becoming the first man to survive the grapevine version. Another Angle Slam is countered into another F5 but Brock doesn’t cover.

Instead he looks to the top rope and smiles. Brock goes up top and tries a shooting star press but leaves it WAY short (To be fair, Angle was over halfway across the ring. No one could pull it off from that far away, though Brock has hit the move before so it wasn’t as crazy as it sounds) and lands square on his head in an absolutely terrifying spot. Brock looks like he’s on another planet (probably because he is) but still hits a third F5 for the pin and the title at 21:08.

Rating: B+. This is a good match but as is so often the case with either guy, the suplexes get repetitive. The ending really hurts it too but the match is a classic if the shooting star connects. It would have blown the fans away but instead it was a scary landing, which really can’t be blamed on Brock as Angle was too far away (not his fault either). Really good match but it’s a step beneath some others.

The look on Brock’s face is really scary as he’s clearly gone. They shake hands and the highlight package ends the show.

Overall Rating: A-. If you tweak a few things here, this is in the running for the greatest show of all time. However, stuff like the musical performances and the Miller Lite girls really hold things back. Hogan vs. Vince isn’t as good as the Shane vs. Vince match from two years ago but it’s fun in a different way.

The show is still great though and could have been better if they had swapped the card a bit. The five major matches in a row needed to be broken up a little bit, maybe with the Undertaker match moved in between Vince vs. Hogan and Rock vs. Austin, which probably should have gone last. All of the problems (which are minor) aside though, this is still a great show and one of the best Wrestlemanias of all time.

Ratings Comparison

Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Original: D

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C+

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A-

2013 Redo: A-

2015 Redo: A

HHH vs. Booker T

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: D+

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Original: B

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D+

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Original: B+

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: B+

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

2013 Redo: B+

2015 Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B

2013 Redo: A-

2015 Redo: A-

Everything seems about the same here, though that women’s match keeps growing on me.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/26/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-19-overrated/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/28/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xix/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Wrestlemania XIX
Date: March 30, 2003
Location: Safeco Field, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 54,097
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

We’re into the brand split now, which means there are two world titles to deal with. On this show however there are two other matches which could easily be considered the main event. This show is considered one of the best Wrestlemanias of all time but I’ve never been the biggest fan of it due to reasons I’ll list later on. My opinion has been changed before though so let’s get to it.

The opening video is about what Wrestlemania means to everyone. This is the theme they went with last year and it works here like it did last year. Interestingly enough most of these highlights are from Wrestlemania X7 instead of last year’s show.

The theme song is called Crack Addict. Needless to say this was never mentioned on TV.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Matt Hardy

Matt is defending and this is during his Matt Hardy Version 1 period. In other words, he was completely self obsessed and had factoids popping up on screen during his entrance (Matt is appearing in his 4^th Wrestlemania, Matt often wonders how they did Wrestlemania without him, Matt strongly dislikes mustard etc). He also has Shannon Moore as his Mattitude Follower (MF’er). Matt tries to speed things up to start but Rey backdrops him to the apron and adds a fast headscissors to take over. Oh and Rey is starting the “dress up like a superhero at Wrestlemania” thing here by wearing a Daredevil themed mask.

Rey loads up a sunset bomb to the floor but Moore makes another save. The champion takes over with a shot to the ribs for two back inside before hitting a Ricochet (kind of side slam) for two. Rey jumps into a kick to the ribs but still counters the Twist of Fate into a rollup for two. The Side Effect gets two for the champion and it’s off to a bow and arrow hold.

That doesn’t last long so Matt tries a shoulder into the corner, only to go shoulder first into the post. Rey hits a springboard seated senton and a tornado DDT for two each but Moore breaks up the 619. Twist of Fate gets two and Hardy is getting frustrated. Matt loads up a superplex but gets countered into a rana out of the corner for two. Moore tries to interfere again but Hardy is rammed into him instead, allowing Rey to hit the 619. The West Coast Pop is ducked though and Matt rolls him up with a handful of ropes to retain.

Rating: C+. This felt like it ended out of nowhere which isn’t the right way to end a match like this. Mysterio was brand new and WAY over at this point, so not giving him the title here was kind of a headscratching move. Rey would win the title from Hardy, although it wouldn’t be for another three months. The match itself was still pretty solid stuff though with both guys moving all over the place and Matt using enough power moves to counter Rey while still being fast enough to be a cruiserweight if that makes sense.

The Miller Lite Catfight Girls are here. This would be your celebrity involvement for the year. They were from a series of beer commercials and would argue over various stupid things, in this case which match is bigger: Vince vs. Hogan or Rock vs. Austin III.

We recap Undertaker’s partner for later tonight, Nathan Jones, being laid out by A-Train and Big Show earlier tonight.

Limp Bizkit plays Undertaker to the ring and no one cares. By plays to the ring I mean performs the song until Taker finally comes out.

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Taker avoids a sneak attack to start and hits a quick chokeslam on A-Train for two. Big Show pulls him to the floor though and will be starting it seems. Taker has to fight out of the wrong corner and it’s quickly off to A-Train. The dead man busts out a LEAPFROG of all things before taking A-Train down with a back elbow. Old School hits but Taker has to punch Big Show instead of covering.

The Derailer (chokebomb) puts Taker down and Big Show rams him into the post for good measure. Back in and A-Train hits a slingshot into the middle rope for two. Big Show comes in again and all Taker can do is throw desperate right hands. A Big Show chokeslam is countered into a Fujiwara Armbar of all things but A-Train comes in to break it up. Taker throws him in a cross armbreaker but Big Show legdrops him to take control.

Off to an abdominal stretch by Big Show to slow things down a bit. A-Train adds in some cheating before coming in for an abdominal stretch of his own. Now Taker counters into one of his own to complete the set (You can own them all!), only to have A-Train hip toss his way out of it. A-Train clotheslines him down and talks some LOUD trash before Taker comes back with right hands. A running DDT gets two for Taker but it’s back to Big Show.

Taker is like screw this defense stuff and pounds away on Big Show in the corner before running across the ring over and over for clotheslines to both guys. The jumping clothesline puts Show down but a bicycle kick from A-Train puts him down all over again. There’s a Big Show chokeslam but here’s Nathan Jones in the aisle to knock out Big Show with a spin kick. Jones come in and kicks A-Train down, setting up the Tombstone to continue the Streak.

Rating: C. Another not bad match here with Taker doing what he could with two guys this size. It was kind of slow, but there’s only so much you can do with this kind of a clash of styles and no partner for the Dead Man. While definitely not memorable or anything, it did well enough at what it was supposed to do, bad musical number aside.

Undertaker waves an American flag post match to show how awesome he is.

The Catfight Girls run into Stacy Keibler and Torrie in the back with talk of a new marketing campaign. Next.

We recap the Heat match where the Dudleys cost RVD and Kane the tag titles for no apparent reason. This won’t be mentioned again tonight.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Jazz vs. Victoria

Victoria is defending and is still psycho here. She’s also Tara for you TNA fans. Jazz hits a quick dropkick for two on Trish before Victoria can even get to the ring. Off to what we would call a Last Chancery to the Canadian after the champion is knocked to the floor. Everyone winds up outside with the champion taking over. She sends Trish back inside for a slingshot legdrop, getting two. Jazz and Victoria square off now before turning their attentions back to Stratus for some double teaming.

That goes nowhere though as it’s time for the villains to fight again with Jazz getting two off a powerslam. Trish comes back with a rollup on Victoria for two but she clotheslines Trish down for two as a result. Jerry: “Trish is like a quarter among pennies in there.” JR: “…..what?” Jazz hits a sitout powerslam for two on Stratus before arguing with Victoria even more. A spin kick by Jazz hits Victoria by mistake and allows Trish to roll her up for two. The Chick Kick puts Jazz down and the Stratusphere does the same to Victoria.

The champion is knocked to the floor as Jazz puts Trish in a half crab which is transitioned into an STF. Victoria’s boyfriend/manager Steven Richards comes in to send Jazz to the floor, allowing the other two to trade rollups for two each. Jazz comes back in and lifts Trish up for a double chickenwing before dropping her down on her uh…face. Yeah face. Victoria kicks Jazz down but misses a moonsault, knocking herself to the floor. Richards comes in and hits himself with a chair. As he goes to the floor, Trish hits the Chick Kick on Victoria for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. Not bad again here and one of the better women’s matches I’ve seen in a long time. There wasn’t much of a story being told here but at the same time, they looked like they knew what they were doing and never looked lost, which puts them miles ahead of anything in the last three years of Divas matches.

Hollywood Rock doesn’t want to hear about the People because they booed him last year. Rock is indeed a sellout because he sells out every Wrestlemania he’s been at. Tonight he doesn’t care about the people because tonight is about fulfilling his destiny by beating Austin at Wrestlemania once and for all. He talks about everyone remembering Act III and they’ll remember it tonight when Rock beats Austin in their final encounter at Wrestlemania. Not his best work here.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Los Guerreros vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Haas and Benjamin are defending here. This is Benoit’s reward for having the match of the year against Angle two months earlier, followed by a feud with the freaking FBI while Kevin Nash got world title shots on PPV. I’m sure HHH has NOTHING to do with this right? It’s a big brawl to start until we get down to Benoit vs. Guerrero for a chop off. They collide in the middle of the ring with both guys going down. Rhyno comes in to face Eddie and gets two off a powerslam.

Off to Shelton who pounds Rhyno down before hitting an elbow to the face for two. Off to Haas for a double tag team by the champions on Rhyno. Rhyno throws Haas around with ease and it’s off to Benoit for more chops in the corner. A snap suplex gets two as does its belly to back cousin. Back to Rhyno vs. Benjamin as the announcers talk about Haas and Benjamin having stage fright.

Eddie comes in and dropkicks Rhyno down before it’s back to Benoit for more chopping on his fellow dead guy. Eddie snapmares him down and loads up the Frog Splash, only to have Benoit run over to the corner for some crotching and a superplex. Guerrero comes right back with a brainbuster for two as Haas breaks up the cover again. Off to Chavo who fires off some fast clotheslines to the champions, only to get caught in Rolling Germans by Benoit.

Benjamin comes in off a blind tag and superkicks Chris down for two. Eddie tags himself in and collides with Benoit to put both guys down. Shelton comes in to work on Benoit some more and a legdrop gets two. Eddie breaks it up with a Frog Splash but Chavo tags himself in, only to be suplexed down by Haas. Rhyno comes in for some Gores including one to Chavo, but Benjamin comes in (I have no idea if he was legal) and steals the retaining pin on Chavo.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it had no business being on Wrestlemania. This could have been on any given episode of Smackdown and no one would have noticed the difference. Rhyno and Benoit were just thrown together while the Guerreros were a regular team and former champions. Not bad here but not Wrestlemania worthy.

The Catfight Girls and Stacy/Torrie now argue over who made Wrestlemania. This is so stupid. They’re going to settle the argument in bed. Oh dear. One of the girls keeps saying Hulk “Holgan”.

Right here is where things start to become problematic. There are five matches left on the card and any one of them could be a PPV main event on a major show. The problem is there’s nothing but that left and we’re only an hour into the show.

We recap Shawn vs. Jericho. Shawn returned last year and won the world title in a shocker. The two of them started feuding right before the Rumble where they eliminated each other. Jericho wanted to be a wrestler because he wanted to be Shawn Michaels. People started calling him the next HBK, but he wanted to be the first Chris Jericho. Jericho then went insane with the jealousy and obsession with being the best by destroying Shawn with a chair. One night when Jericho was walking through the entrance, Shawn superkicked him and said he would see Jericho at Wrestlemania.

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

As Shawn comes to the ring he fires off a bunch of confetti canons but some of them don’t work. Shawn’s “what are you gonna do” look is funny. Lockup to start with Shawn taking over via an armdrag. Jericho escapes the armbar attempt so Shawn lounges on the top rope to rub it in. Off to a hammerlock by the Texan and we get a nice technical sequence with the two mirroring each other very nicely. Shawn hooks a headlock takeover for some token two counts as things are still in first gear.

Back up and Jericho avoids a leapfrog and slaps Shawn in the face. Shawn slaps him right back and avoids a charge, sending Jericho out to the floor. A baseball slide keeps Jericho in trouble but back inside he rolls through a top rope cross body for two. Jericho hits a spinwheel kick to put Shawn down again before sending him into the buckle. Shawn blocks the bulldog though and crotches Jericho in the corner. At least Fozzy will have some higher pitched songs now.

Shawn puts on a Figure Four of all things but Jericho quickly rolls it over. Another attempt at the hold is countered and Jericho sends Shawn shoulder first into the post. Jericho tries to throw him to the floor but Shawn skins the cat into a headscissors to bring Jericho outside with him, followed by a sweet plancha to take Chris down again. Shawn tries a dropkick on the floor, only to be caught in the Walls of Jericho.

The American’s back is all messed up again now and Jericho rams him back first into the post a few times for good measure. As Shawn tries to get back in Jericho hits that sweet springboard dropkick of his and nails Shawn right in the face. A pair of suplexes get two for Jericho back inside and there’s a backbreaker for good measure. Off to a chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back to give them a breather.

Shawn fights up and counters a backdrop into a DDT to put both guys down. Jericho still gets up first anyway and hits Shawn’s forearm and nipup combo for good measure. Shawn nips up as well and starts slugging away before hitting a backdrop to put Jericho down. The moonsault press out of the corner gets two and they trade pinfall attempt at a very fast pace, resulting in Shawn rolling out of the Walls. Gee his back seems fine all of a sudden.

Jericho hits a northern lights suplex for two but Shawn bridges up into a backslide attempt, only to have Chris knock him down. There’s the bulldog put Shawn down but the Lionsault only gets two. Shawn tries a standing rana but gets countered into the Walls as Jericho to put Michaels in BIG trouble. Ok maybe bot so big as he makes the rope a few seconds alter. Shawn grabs a quick small package for two but gets caught in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to put him back down.

Jericho loads up Sweet Chin Music for the final insult and it hits just about perfectly. That only gets two as does a cross body by Shawn. Shawn keeps the thunder stealing theme going by trying the Walls on Jericho but has to opt for a catapult into the corner instead. Jericho comes back with a belly to back superplex attempt but Shawn counters in mid air into a cross body for two.

Michaels goes up again but Jericho kicks the referee into the ropes to crotch Shawn down on the top. Jericho tries a superplex but gets shoved down and hit with the top rope elbow for two. Shawn loads up the Superkick but gets caught in the Walls again. Jericho drags him back to the middle of the ring but Shawn makes it on the second attempt.

A boot to the faces gets two for Shawn as the fans are WAY into this now. Back up and Jericho whips him hard into the corner for a Flair Flip to mess with the back even more. Chris tries a belly to back suplex but Shawn flips over and jumps up into a rolling cradle for the pin out of nowhere on Jericho.

Rating: A-. What did you expect off a match like this? They beat the heck out of each other here, although Shawn’s eternally on and off selling was a bit distracting. They did a great job of telling the back and forth story though, and that’s what the whole point here was. It’s also a loss that doesn’t hurt the loser which is always a good thing.

Post match Jericho kicks Shawn low like a real heel.

Sylvan Grenier, a crooked referee, goes in to see Vince.

We get the new attendance record announcement.

Limp Bizkit performs Crack Addict live. Again, not the best use of PPV time to say the least.

It’s time for the Catfight nonsense. The Girls are brought out as are Stacy and Torrie, all of whom sit on a bed for effect. This is exactly what you would expect: clothes being ripped off, spanking, Coach being stripped down. You know the drill.

We recap Booker T. vs. HHH which is borderline uncomfortable. Booker talked about being an ex-con and making his way up to where he is now. HHH started saying “someone like you shouldn’t be world champion”, which very quickly came to have extremely racial overtones. Booker won a battle royal for the shot and pinned HHH in a tag match leading up to this.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T

HHH is in his manly purple trunks here. They fight into the corner to start with Booker smacking HHH in the face a few times to take over. A backdrop puts HHH down but he comes back with a clothesline. The champion goes up top but just like his mentor, he gets armdragged down with ease. A clothesline puts HHH down for two but Booker goes up and gets knocked down to the floor for his efforts.

Booker gets sent into the announce table as the referee tells HHH to get back in, complete with some very salty language from the referee. Lawler keeps making jokes about Booker being an ex-con as HHH gets two off a neckbreaker. Booker tries to fight back with right hands but gets caught in a spinebuster for two for the champion. A suplex is escaped though and Booker DDTs him down for no cover.

Booker pounds away on HHH before taking him down with a forearm. A spinning variety of said forearm gets two but HHH comes back with his lame sleeper, which was the move he was trying to get over at this point to no avail. The facebuster staggers Booker but he comes back with a quick spinebuster for two. HHH tries going up again but jumps into a jumping superkick for two.

The Harlem Side Kick misses HHH and Booker crashes out to the floor. Flair gets in some shots before sending Booker back in for a freaking Indian Deathlock as we continue the trip back to 1974. Since the hold goes on forever and I have a chance to look at it, the question occurs to me of why does that hold hurt? Their legs are in the exact same positions, so why would it only hurt Booker?

Anyway Booker gets to the rope for the break and we get to the work over the leg to set up the Figure Four because we need to pay tribute to Flair every 18 seconds portion of the match. A rollup out of nowhere gets two for Booker and he counters the Pedigree, only to be kicked into the referee in the corner. Not that it matters as the referee counts a quick two off a rollup anyway.

A big back elbow puts HHH down and the scissors kick looks to finish but Booker can’t cover. The delayed cover gets two and Booker goes up top. He has to knock Flair down, allowing HHH to load up a superplex. That gets broken up too though and it’s the Harlem Hangover (flip legdrop) for a very close two thanks to Flair. Not that it matters though as HHH kicks him in the leg, hits the Pedigree, covers 30 seconds later and retains the title.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t horrible but TOTALLY the wrong booking here. There was zero reason to have HHH go over here other than he wanted to. Booker had been built up perfectly over the last few weeks and every sign pointed to him winning here, but instead HHH absolutely has to go over to set up that EPIC Kevin Nash feud in a few months.

Wrestlemania 20 is in Madison Square Garden.

We recap Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon. This feud was A MESS as all of a sudden Hogan came back and Vince decided he hated him so they should fight. The problem is Vince never quite made his reasons for suddenly hating Hogan clear other than Vince was nuts. This led to a debate about which of them made Wrestlemania and saying the match was 20 years in the making. Not exactly but when nothing else in the feud makes sense, why should this?

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

This is a street fight because that’s how Vince rolls and if Hogan loses he has to retire. Hogan pounds away to start before pounding away on the mat. Vince is knocked down into the corner and stomped down for good measure but he gets in a thumb to the eye to give himself a breather. A clothesline takes Hogan down and Vince Pounds away in the corner. He drops some knees into Hogan’s shoulder as we actually get an attempt at psychology here. Seriously, why?

Vince wraps the arm around the post before hooking a test of strength grip with Hulk in trouble. Hogan tries to fight up but gets kicked right back down. That works so well that they do it again before Vince throws Hogan out to the floor. With Hogan in trouble Vince picks up a chair but the swing only hits post. Hogan pounds him down and hits a chair shot to Vince’s head for good measure, busting Vince open.

They head back in, only for Hogan to punch him out to the floor. Another chair shot to the back puts Vince down as does a third. Hogan swings again but knocks out the Spanish announcer by mistake. Vince hits Hogan in his Real American testicles as the slow brawling continues. A chair shot puts Hogan down and Vince pulls out a ladder, making me think this ends badly.

Hulk is busted open too as Vince lays him onto the announce table. In the big spot of the match, Vince climbs the ladder and drops a “leg” through Hogan and through the table. Hogan is thrown back in as Vince gets a lead pipe. He looks up from under the ring apron and has a hilariously evil grin on his face. Vince loads up a pipe shot but Hogan hits him low. Cue RODDY PIPER of all people to blast Hogan in the head with the pipe. This surprises Cole and Tazz because….they’re not that bright. Seriously, Piper and Hogan HATED each other and they’re surprised he attacked Hogan? Why?

Piper leaves and Vince gets two off the pipe shot. This match needs to end like NOW as it’s well past the point of entertaining and is reaching stupid. Vince goes for the pipe but is stopped by the referee, causing the referee to go flying out to the floor. The EVIL French referee from earlier today comes out as Hulk is hit with another pipe shot and a Vince legdrop for two. It’s Hulk Up time though and he lays out both Vince and the crooked referee before hitting the big boot and THREE legdrops to kill Vince dead for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t the worst match in the world but going twenty minutes completely misses the idea of something like this. Again I’m not sure what this accomplishes other than setting up Hogan vs. Piper in a feud that didn’t exactly light the world on fire in 2013. Fun but pretty awful match here.

Shane McMahon comes out to check on his father post match. He glares at Hogan but nothing happens. Ok then. Ever the jerk, the bloody Vince flips off Hogan to end things.

We recap Rock vs. Austin III. Austin came back from walking out on the company due to boredom and the newly heel Hollywood Rock wanted to finally beat Austin at Wrestlemania. Do you need much else of a story beyond that?

Steve Austin vs. The Rock

Austin pounds away to start but can’t hook an early Stunner. Rock bails to the floor but gets clotheslined down in the aisle. Austin rams him into the steps and chops away before dropping him onto the barricade a few times. Rock is whipped HARD into the steps before they head back inside. A big clothesline puts Rock down but he takes out Austin’s bad knee to send Steve to the floor.

Rock stomps away on the knee as Austin stumbles around ringside. The leg is wrapped around the post but Austin pops up with more right hands. Rock kicks the leg out again and puts on the Sharpshooter, only to have Austin crawl to the rope. JR goes on a big rant against Lawler about how this is a wrestling match and not about puppies or Hollywood. Rock wraps the leg around the post a few more times before heading outside and putting on Austin’s vest.

Austin comes back with a clothesline and the Thesz Press to pound away on Rock. The middle finger elbow keeps Rock down again and it’s time to stomp a mudhole, but Rock comes back with right hands. Austin counters with a Rock Bottom of his own for a very close two. Rock fights up and hits a Stunner of his own out of nowhere for two more. Back up again and Rock pounds away, only to walk into the real Stunner for another close two.

Austin goes to pick Rock up but the guy with Austin’s vest on hits him low to break it up. The People’s Elbow misses but the Stunner is countered into a spinebuster, followed by the removal of the vest and the Elbow for two. A Rock Bottom gets two on Austin, another Rock Bottom gets two but a BIG Rock Bottom is finally enough to end Austin.

Rating: B+. It’s definitely a step or three below the one from two years ago but it’s definitely still entertaining. My problem with it as usual though is that it doesn’t have anything on it. When you have two huge matches between the two before when they were on top and now you get them both well past their primes for nothing but pride, it’s a bit harder to get into it. Still very good, but not as great as their others.

Austin salutes the crowd for the final time as he leaves. As of this 2013, this is Austin’s final match.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle for the main event. The idea is simple: Angle is an awesome wrestler, Lesnar thinks he’s better. Brock won the Rumble to get the shot and tonight is a mega showdown. At this point though, Angle’s neck is basically hanging on by a thread.

There was a very real chance he would have to retire before the match, but he begged and pleaded to be allowed to have this match, which most people believed would be his last. There was a match in Pittsburgh on Smackdown where Lesnar beat Angle, but it wound up being his very similar brother Eric. This match was originally going to be the title change because Kurt couldn’t go at Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

If Angle is disqualified or counted out or if anyone interferes, he loses the title. Lesnar has slightly injured ribs and Cole’s voice is almost gone. Brock sends him into the corner to start but Kurt takes him down to the mat with a front facelock. They fight over an armbar with neither guy being able to get extended control. Now it’s a fight over a headlock as the fast paced mat work continues.

Lesnar rolls Angle off and it’s a standoff. Brock takes him down with an armdrag into an armbar but Kurt grabs a rope. He pounds away at Brock’s back but Lesnar fires off some shoulders into Angle’s ribs in the corner. A powerslam puts Angle down for two but Angle comes right back with a German suplex. After Brock hits a fast gorilla press, Angle hits another German to send Brock’s ribs into the buckle.

Angle goes after the ribs like a barracuda, stomping away in the corner before hooking a chinlock with a bodyscissors. He shifts it into a kind of crossface grip before into a chinlock. A knee to Brock’s back sends him out to the floor but as they come back inside, Brock plants him down with a spinebuster. Lesnar fires off some clotheslines and shoulders in the corner, only to charge into an elbow. Brock is fine with that by snapping off an overhead belly to belly and another one for two.

Kurt comes back with Rolling Germans and Brock is spent. Angle’s neck is bothering him though and you can see his eyes not looking right. The Angle Slam is countered into an F5 attempt but Angle reverses that into the ankle lock. Brock gets the rope but Angle pulls him back without the hold being broken. For some reason that’s ok with the referee and Kurt switches it up to a half crab. Brock finally kicks Angle away and launches him out to the floor.

The champ hits a SWEET release German on Brock for two and the Angle Slam gets the same. Lesnar comes back with the Angle Slam for two of his own as the fans are getting way into this now. Back to the ankle lock by Kurt and he hooks the grapevine for good measure. Brock somehow makes it to the rope, which I believe is the only time anyone has escaped the grapevine version of the ankle lock.

F5 is countered into a small package but the Angle Slam is countered into another F5 which connects for no cover. Instead Brock goes to the top rope for the famous spot of the match, as he completely botches a Shooting Star Press, landing square on his head. With Lesnar’s brains somewhere in Bermuda, Angle covers for two. Lesnar stands up, hits another F5, and wins the title before heading off for medical attention. The gone look on Brock’s face is terrifying.

Rating: B+. It’s another very good match, but it’s still not a masterpiece. The botch is the main thing that people remember but the match is still very good for the most part. Angle competing in this condition was freaking STUPID at the end of the day and it’s no wonder that he’s basically insane now. Very good match though and a good way to start Lesnar’s second title reign.

Both guys stagger to their feet and hug to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. It’s an excellent show but it’s not as great as Mania 17. The opening stuff didn’t work nearly as well as the main event stuff, but the biggest thing holding it back from greatness is the lack of THAT match. The most memorable thing about this show is the Shooting Star and that’s because it was a botch. If that thing hit though, this is much higher because that’s a huge Wrestlemania moment to put Lesnar way higher up in history. Still though, excellent show and well worth watching.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Ratings Comparison

Matt Hardy vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Undertaker vs. A-Train/Big Show

Original: D

Redo: C

Trish Stratus vs. Victoria vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: C

Los Guerreros vs. Team Angle vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Original: C+

Redo: C

Chris Jericho vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A-

Redo: A-

HHH vs. Booker T

Original: C+

Redo: C+

Hulk Hogan vs. Vince McMahon

Original: B

Redo: D+

The Rock vs. Steve Austin

Original: B+

Redo: B+

Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: A-

What the heck was I thinking on that Hogan match?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/26/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-19-overrated/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2000 Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Part 1 (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/02/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-thunder-reviews-volume-vii-january-june-2000/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6