NXT – November 23, 2011 – Same Old Stuff Here

NXT
Date: November 23, 2011
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Matt Striker, William Regal

It’s the Thanksgiving week show and the show is somehow back up to three finalists. Only this show could go from two finalists to three to two to three again and take a few months to do so. This is the 38th episode of the season, putting this on the verge of being as long as the first three seasons combined. I thought just the third was ridiculous but this passed that long ago. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Young to open the show with I believe new music. We get a clip of Young beating up O’Neil and his finisher is called the Gut Check. It’s the fireman’s carry into a double knee to the ribs. Young says this is his show and wants to know where the people were last week when he beat O’Neil down. Is there a difference between being beaten up and being beaten down? He says his usual stuff about how he’s done a ton of stuff and how O’Neil hasn’t done anything.

Cue Reks and Hawkins of all people who say that the only thing Young accomplished was jumping Titus, which they’ve done a bunch of times. They’re impressed with Young and say they’re very similar. They think he has the It Factor but here are O’Neil and Watson. They make fun of Reks’ lack of charisma and cut Young off. Titus talks about getting eliminated a year ago in this town but he’s back to show his agenda. There’s the brawl but Striker makes O’Neil/Watson vs. Reks/Young.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Johnny Curtis

Bateman and Maxine are on commentary for no apparent reason. We talk about the wedding and then realize that’s stupid so we talk about Johnny Curtis. That makes it stupider so let’s talk about the wedding again. Regal offers to explain the misery of being married, since he’s been married 16 times. Regal talks about Bateman’s mother in law and implies sex. He even admits they’re ignoring the match. Can’t fault him for lying.

Curtis goes to the apron for a slingshot legdrop and shakes his hips at Maxine. Regal: “I think that was for me. At my age you have to take what you can get.” Suplex gets two for Curtis. Bateman makes another joke about Curtis and Maxine dating so they walk off. The wedding is in eight weeks, which I guess means we’ll be here until January. Yoshi fires off the chops and a spinwheel kick puts Johnny down. The top rope spinwheel kick ends this at 4:35.

Rating: C. This was fine. Yoshi is a solid hand while Curtis….well he’s Johnny Curtis. That should summarize this match as well as I can put it together. Not much to see here but it advances Bateman vs. Curtis I guess because we need to see it right? Not much to see here but Yoshi’s stuff is always fun to see.

Bateman goes to the ring post match but doesn’t attack Curtis.

Maxine and Bateman argue more in the back about what Curtis did during the date. She cancels sex until future notice. Curtis comes in and implies Maxine wants him.

Here are the Usos who do their dance before their promo. Jimmy talks about being nervous every time they come out here. They represent every Samoan ever in wrestling history. Jey talks about people like Yokozuna, the Wild Samoans, Umaga (didn’t expect to hear that name) and Rikishi. They talk about how Uso means brother but saying Us (pronounced Oos) can mean friend, close person, etc. They start a call and response chant with the audience of we say Us, you say O, which gets a surprisingly strong response. The fans like these guys.

This brings out JTG and Tamina, who says this isn’t about heritage because she’s an independent woman. Let’s have a match.

JTG vs. Jimmy Uso

Jimmy knocks him to the floor quickly so he can glare at Tamina a bit. Off to a chinlock by JTG as we list off the huge Samoan family tree. Stinger style splash in the corner hits JTG and there’s the running him smash in the corner, which is credited to Rikishi but it’s an Umaga move I believe. A superkick and frog splash are enough for the pin at 3:50.

Rating: C-. Why are the Usos on NXT? The fans like them, they’re decent in the ring, they have a gimmick, and they’re on NXT. I have no idea what the thought of this company is about them, but they’re more than good enough to be something on one of the main shows, but they’re not getting that at all here. It’s WWE I guess.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. Darren Young/Tyler Reks

Young vs. Watson gets us going. My goodness what a difference a gimmick change makes for Watson. O’Neil comes in and Young runs. He’s now the Big Deal Titus O’Neil. Reks talks trash so Titus hammers him in the face. This goes on for awhile until Watson comes in and cleans house. The heels go to the floor so Percy dives onto them as we take a break. Back with Titus getting two on Reks off a move we don’t see.

Back to Watson who doesn’t do as well. We talk about Bateman getting a Smackdown contract and we hear about how this season is about getting to one of the main shows. So at least there’s no talk of season 6. Regal talks about WWE 12. “I HAVE ABS!!!” Young hooks a chinlock on Watson to eat up some time. Gordbuster gets two for Reks. There’s your double tag to Young and O’Neil but Hawkins throws in the cane, so that the Gut Check can end Titus at 11:00.

Rating: D+. Boring main event here with neither team being interesting in being out there it seems. We have a heel team now I guess which is fine, but I’ll spare you the drill here on “but where is this going”. We’ve been past that for a very long time and there’s no point in saying it all the time. Too long of a main event though.

Overall Rating: D+. Pretty ho-hum stuff tonight with not much going on of note. This was more of a show about advancing the existing storylines rather than adding anything new to the mix. In other words, if you liked the rest of the storylines, you’ll like this. Nothing to see here for the most part though and it wasn’t much of a show.

Results
Yoshi Tatsu b. Johnny Curtis – Top Rope Spinwheel Kick
Jimmy Uso b. JTG – Frog Splash
Darren Young/Tyler Reks b. Percy Watson/Tyler Reks – Gut Check to O’Neil

 

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NXT – November 9, 2011 – I’ve Seen Graveyards More Alive Than This Crowd

NXT
Date: November 9, 2011
Location: Liverpool Echo Arena, Liverpool, England
Commentators: Jack Korpela, Matt Striker

We’re in England this week so expect a few Regal chants. I’ve actually lost count of the number of weeks we’ve had now and frankly I don’t care. This is going to hit a year I believe and I wouldn’t be surprised if it did. Darren Young is eligible for his return now and I hope they release him before he makes said return. It’s not like he offers anything to the company anyway. Let’s get to it.

Striker is in the ring with Bateman, Watson, O’Neil and Maxine. He says two of the rookie finalists which implies there may be more, which scares me to death. Bateman says Maxine is beautiful and they make out. O’Neil makes fish jokes and for the love of goodness, EXPLAIN WHAT IT MEANS. I know the joke, but if you’re going to say it over and over again you may want to point that out more than once.

Striker says he’s been keeping an eye on the rookies and judging them. This brings out Johnny Curtis of all people. He says the show sucks anymore and Titus wants to fight him. It’s implied and confirmed that Curtis and Maxine went out before. The main event of Watson/O’Neil vs. Bateman/Curtis is made. Oh joy.

There’s an article on WWE.com on why Rock and Cena could make a good tag team. That needs an whole article? IT’S ROCK AND CENA!

Wait why isn’t Regal on commentary? Hopefully he’s wrestling on a Raw house show.

Tyson Kidd vs. Trent Barretta

I’d be perfectly fine with Barretta getting more TV time on this show. They go to the mat quickly and Matt says Kidd is complaining about being bastardized by the WWE. Striker makes fun of Maxine for being a less than scrupulous and is having a good time on commentary. We hear a voice I don’t think we’re supposed to hear as this match isn’t all that interesting. It’s fine but I have no reason to care about these guys.

Tyson works the arm as Striker gives us a brief history of the Hart Dungeon. The announcers get into a debate about recording stuff on tape/Betamax etc and Jack says you watch NXT on WWE.com. Without missing a beat, Striker: “Who does that?” I love lines like that. They’ve been on the mat for the most part until a Trent clothesline puts Tyson on the floor.

Trent is launched into the post and we take a break. Back with them in the ring and Tyson holding a dragon sleeper. Off to a chinlock as the announcers mainly ignore the match. At least with this it’s a nothing match and they’re not talking about any individual thing. Jack asks if the challenges and point stuff is still going on and Matt says it’s a week to week thing. Trent takes over with a top rope cross body for two. A shot in the corner gets the same.

He tries a tornado DDT but Tyson hits a SWEET spin kick to take over. Brainbuster gets two. Back to the floor and Trent avoids a charge into the barricade. Barretta busts out a Whisper in the Wind off said barricade and both guys are down. Back in there’s a slingshot elbow for two. They go to the corner but Kidd manages to drop Trent on his head/neck as Trent tries a top rope rana and a one leg Liontamer ends this at 11:23.

Rating: B-. Good match here with both guys getting time to make things work. I really like Barretta and would love to see him get more time. The guy puts on decent matches every time he’s out there and this was no exception. I’d love to see an NXT Title and let guys do things like this every week on it. That Whisper in the Wind was pretty awesome. Check this match out if you have about 12 minutes to kill. It’s pretty good.

Bateman is yelling about Maxine dating Curtis. Curtis comes up and implies Maxine is bad in bed.

JTG hits on Tamina when the Usos come up to tell him to get lost. She doesn’t like them interfering so they say Santino is better than JTG. She’s going to be in JTG’s corner tonight.

Jimmy Uso vs. JTG

Jimmy doesn’t get an entrance so we don’t get the dance thing that I can’t spell. Jimmy controls to start so JTG makes fun of the war dance. Uso means brother in Samoan. That name makes much more sense now. The match is nothing special so far. Jimmy goes up but Tamina distracts him so JTG hits a dropkick, sending him to the floor. JTG hits a faceplant out of the corner for two as we talk about Survivor Series.

Matt asks Jack for his picks for Survivor Series and Jack has NOTHING. Matt even makes fun of him for it and it’s actually a bit embarrassing. Then again so is JTG and he keeps his job. Let’s keep the camera on Tamina for about 10 seconds now. It’s clear neither guy has anything to talk about as Jimmy takes over. The top rope splash ends this at 5:22.

Rating: C-. So? I’ll spare you the rant about how this show is so boring and all that jazz, but this was boring as usual. JTG is a guy that isn’t intimidating as a heel at all. He’s supposed to be a fun character and I don’t get the point in making him a heel for so long. It’s not like his status means anything. Weak match with a pointless angle tacked on.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. Derrick Bateman/Johnny Curtis

My stars what a dull heel team. We’ve got like 6 minutes left in this show so we’re not going to have much here. Watson starts with Bateman and speeds things up quickly. Off to Curtis who doesn’t do much better. Off to O’Neil and I’ve seen funeral processions more excited than this crowd. Bateman sends Percy’s back into the post to take over. We talk about Curtis being an orphan to fill in air time. La Parka of all people is referenced by Striker. Jack: “No one knows who you’re talking about.” There’s the double tag and even Titus can’t wake the crowd up. Clash of the Titus is broken up and a High/Low ends Titus at 4:40.

Rating: D. This was horribly uninteresting. They did their thing but a lot of the problems were due to the lack of time. Well that and Curtis being the least interesting guy I can remember in a very long time. Nothing to see here and the show itself as a whole was the same. Wow this was bad.

Overall Rating: D+. The opener was good but the rest was just DULL. I haven’t heard a crowd this dead since the last time I was in a cemetery. Totally boring show and I don’t know if it was them being tired from the flight or what, but this was as bad as this show has been (save for the good opener) in a long time. Either end the show or get it back to America IMMEDIATELY.

Results
Tyson Kidd b. Trent Barretta – One Leg Boston Crab
Jimmy Uso b. JTG – Top Rope Splash
Johnny Curtis/Derrick Bateman b. Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson – High/Low to O’Neil

 

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NXT – October 26, 2011 – I Still Like This Show

NXT
Date: October 26, 2011
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

We’re past Vengeance now and there are actually signs that some things are starting to wrap up on this show. I can’t say I’d be complaining, as this show is almost the length of a full term pregnancy at this point. Anyway, according to the card that I’ve seen we might have four matches on here which almost has to be a record for this show. Let’s get to it.

At least they’re trying to make it look like this show is still coherent by not changing the opening credits.

We open with Bateman, JTG, Maxine, O’Neil and Watson in the ring. O’Neil makes fun of Maxine and calls her a dolphin or something. It’s time for the Talk the Talk Challenge. Bateman goes first and talks about football and the Cowboys, who are mostly booed. He makes fun of Titus’ trunks. This is pretty weak. Titus says the trunks are for breast cancer awareness because he lost two grandmothers to it. He says he’s awesome and that Bateman won’t stop him from winning this competition. O’Neil wins with ease.

Titus issues a challenge of his own. He and Watson make fun of Maxine and JTG and a brawl breaks out. Two singles matches are made.

Percy Watson vs. JTG

The fans start booing loudly for some reason at the start of the match but nothing has happened yet. Regal buries the talking skills of both guys as Watson takes it to the mat. Watson knocks him to the floor and we take a break with JTG clubbering him. Back with Watson in control again and getting two off some punches. Out to the floor again with JTG hitting a running clothesline that gets two back in the ring.

Off to some choking and we hear that JTG has been in the WWE for about six years. That doesn’t seem possible to me for some reason. It still makes me smile when I think of people saying he was going to be something once Cryme Tyme broke up. Off to a chinlock as Regal keeps burying the challenge. JTG goes up but jumps into a facebuster to put both guys down. Watson takes over and hits a clothesline and the spinning splash for two. The fireman’s carry into the pancake (called the Persecution) ends this at 6:47.

Rating: D+. Technically it was fine but there was nothing to this at all. Percy’s name isn’t doing him any favors as it makes me think of one of the trains from Thomas the Tank Engine from when I was a kid. JTG continues to be boring and the match was nothing to see at all other than just a long squash.

Hawkins is ranting about his injury and Striker comes up with a suspension due to something related to the walkout. No idea what that’s about. Nor do I particularly care.

The Muppets are coming to Raw. I’m going to get bashed for this, but I haven’t been more excited for a show in YEARS. No sarcasm or joke there at all.

Jey Uso vs. Tyson Kidd

Hawkins is with Kidd here for some reason. Regal talks about Kidd spending the past week in Calgary training with Bret on a rolling Indian Deathlock. Cool sounding move. Uso takes over quickly and puts Kidd in the Tree of Woe for two. Kidd comes back as we compare Harts vs. Samoans. Korpela brings up a good question: if Hawkins is suspended, why is he at ringside?

Tyson hammers away and hooks a chinlock. Regal says he’s the darling of Twitter. My goodness it’s nice to not hear about trending topics for once. Alley-Us doesn’t work so Jey kicks him in the face instead. The Superfly Splash hits knees though and a spinning fisherman’s neckbreaker ends this at 4:33.

Rating: C. Pretty decent match from guys that are actually good in the ring when they get to be in it. Kidd is a good guy to push as the NXT Champion when it finally is introduced. Nothing too bad here and it’s fun to see two young guys out there getting a chance to have some fun. More time would have helped though, but it is just NXT.

Tatsu makes the save from a post match beatdown. We’re waiting on the six man I guess.

Ad for Cena vs. Rock which really is going to be huge. I know that’s a really obvious statement but it’s starting to sink in just how big this match is.

Raw ReBound eats up a few minutes. The announcement would have been a bit better if it hadn’t been told to us at the end of Vengeance.

Rock will make his decision on Raw.

AJ and Kaitlyn talk in the back. Kaitlyn talks about how she’s going to destroy Tamina. Tamina pops up behind her and Kaitlyn knows she’s there. This is stupid but that goes without saying.

Kaitlyn vs. Tamina

Kaitlyn is the hometown girl. Not that we’re told that but I guess it’s implied. Tamina hits a superkick to kill Kaitlyn for two. Tamina beats her down as this is a very dull Divas match so far. That covers a lot of ground too. Tamina goes for a fireman’s carry and Kaitlyn gets her only move of the match with a sunset flip for the pin at 2:58. This was as boring as it sounds.

Derrick Bateman vs. Titus O’Neil

AJ is on commentary because….eh who cares she’s cute. AJ lists off reasons why Maxine isn’t nice, including she’s wicked. I want AJ to call me wicked. Maxine sits in on commentary as well. The girls get into an argument of course and Regal says go ahead and fight. AJ: “Fun fact about Maxine: she feeds off the souls of babies.” Maxine suggests AJ was caught between a midget leprechaun and a large black man in pink underwear that barks like a dog in some very non-PG positions.

Bateman slides to the floor to talk to Maxine and then hits a big dive on Titus when he comes out to see him. Bateman hammers away back in the ring and it’s off to a chinlock. This is all about the commentary and to be fair it’s far more interesting. Regal talks about the match and he’s just outnumbered. The couple’s name is BetaMax. I give up. O’Neil misses something from the ropes and Bateman rolls him up for the pin at 4:40.

Rating: D. The match sucked but the commentary was hilarious. I love shows like these where the announcers know no one important is listening and can have some fun on the commentary. That’s what NXT is good at and it’s far better than listening to Cole talking about Twitter 100 times an hour.

Post match, Bateman proposes to Maxine (Regal: “I think I might start self-harming.”) and gets slapped. Then he gets kissed. O’Neil covering AJ’s eyes on the floor is pretty funny. Maxine says yes. There’s your main angle for three weeks. They hug and Maxine looks like she’s in big trouble.

Overall Rating: C-. If there was a rating between this and D+ it would get that. It’s not really bad but there’s nothing to see here. Again it’s playing out like a low level old school indy company. That’s a fun thing to see because they know they’ve got nothing to lose so why not just have fun out there? That’s a great attitude to have and when you stop taking things so seriously in wrestling, you can have a much more entertaining show at times. This wasn’t their best, but I like watching this show for that laid back feeling to it.

Results
Titus O’Neil won the Talk the Talk Challenge
Percy Watson b. JTG – Persecution
Tyson Kidd b. Jey Uso – Spinning Fisherman’s Neckbreaker
Kaitlyn b. Tamina – Sunset Flip
Derrick Bateman b. Titus O’Neil – Rolling Cradle

 

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NXT – October 19, 2011 – Still Chasing Its Own Tail

NXT
Date: October 19, 2011
Location: Mexican Sports Palace, Mexico City, Mexico
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

Obviously we’re in Mexico now and we only have two people left. The Young suspension may be a blessing in disguise as it might give them an opening to round out this season after the thirty two weeks they’ve had so far. After last week there aren’t any major loose ends that need to be tied up so maybe there’s a means to an end now. Let’s get to it.

We start in the ring….WITH A CHALLENGE??? Striker has a rope and there are flags around the ring ropes (not the one Striker is holding). It’s a capture the flag challenge. There are only O’Neil and Bateman left. This is worth 15 points to really make sure we make the rest of the challenges before this worthless by comparison. They both have on weightlifting belts and there’s a rope attached on their backs. Whoever can get the most flags wins. And after about 15 seconds Bateman jumps Titus and leaves him laying. Titus wins and the main event tonight is Titus/Percy vs. Bateman and whoever Bateman picks.

Tyler Reks vs. Yoshi Tatsu

Hawkins is limping to the rings with Reks. Reks and Hawkins complain about the injury and Reks sounds nothing like his looks would make you expect. Reks overpowers him to start so Tatsu chops away. Yoshi snaps off a spinwheel kick to take over so Reks, being a modern WWE heel, hides. Reks takes over again and the fans don’t seem all that impressed by him.

An O’Connor Roll doesn’t work for Tatsu and Reks works on the back a bit. Tatsu responds by hitting a big kick to the head…and never mind as Reks beats him down all over again. Yoshi dodges a charge and Reks’ shoulder hits the post. That allows Tatsu to go up top for the spinwheel kick and the pin at 4:33.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here but it was fine. This was very basic as they were keeping things simple, primarily due to there only being about 4 and a half minutes to work with. Tatsu’s new look hasn’t meant much of anything, but at least he’s not talking about an action figure anymore.

Post match Reks and Hawkins beat down Tatsu but the Usos make the save. I smell a 6 man.

AJ has a note in the back when Kaitlyn comes in. It’s from Horny and he says leaving is the best decision he ever made. Kaitlyn says it’s from Maxine. Kaitlyn, who looks a lot worse with light blonde hair, fights Maxine next.

Kaitlyn vs. Maxine

Both of them look good but Kaitlyn looks better with darker hair. She has great legs though. Maxine is in essence in a swimsuit. Here’s your Maxine fact: her aunt is a careless maiden from Guadalajara who is engaged to a one legged Elvis impersonator who does a great version of Blue Suede Shoes. The match is your usual basic stuff here that isn’t very good.

Maxine hooks something like a dragon sleeper but Kaitlyn falls into the ropes. The fans here do not care at all. All Maxine so far but I’d rather look at Kaitlyn in gold so I’m not paying attention to the match here. Kaitlyn takes over with her horrible looking offense. She hits a Bubba Bomb and then a full nelson with her legs to make Maxine tap (with her foot) out at 4:48.

Rating: D. It’s your usual bad Divas match and more proof that AJ was the best choice for the 3rd season winner. Kaitlyn looks great in tight gold shorts and other than that, she’s about as worthless as anyone else you’re going to find on the roster. Not much here overall and the girls just aren’t that good. Granted this is on NXT so it’s not like anyone is watching them.

Video on how insane Raw has been lately and how its been in chaos, even dating back to Punk winning the title at MITB. This eats up like five minutes.

Kidd turns down Bateman to be his partner. Maxine comes up to yell at him for not being here. She leaves and JTG comes up to agree to be his partner. Oh my.

Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil vs. JTG/Derrick Bateman

Bateman vs. Watson gets us going and Watson shows off a bit. We go to the mat with a headlock as Regal explains exactly where the arm is supposed to be for it to hurt the most. Leave it to an old villain to know that. There’s a double tag and JTG gets his head kicked off. That was a nice touch because I don’t like JTG. O’Neil has black and pink on for breast cancer awareness. That’s always cool.

The good guys double team JTG for awhile and rule the ring as we take a break. Back with Bateman hammering away on Watson which doesn’t work all that well for him. They head to the floor and Bateman hits a missile dropkick off the apron which gets two back in the ring. Off to JTG again who hammers away a bit more. A spinning neckbreaker gets two. Watson tries to fight back and the fans react to it.

This match has somehow been going on for ten minutes. It’s one of those matches where nothing has been going on at all but it’s been happening if that makes sense. Titus finally gets the hot tag that we know has been coming for awhile now. Bateman breaks up the pin but misses a top rope cross body. Clash of the Titus ends this at 10:41.

Rating: D+. The match was pretty boring but the problem with it is that it summarizes the main problem that these guys are having anymore: there is no reason at all for these matches to take place. If we’re just waiting around for the end of the show and the matches don’t really count towards records or standings or anything, what’s the point? I mean, how many times can O’Neil pin Bateman before it stops meaning anything? I think that’s the question they’re trying to answer.

Overall Rating: C-. Not a horrible show but at the same time it reiterates the same issue I just went into: this show is chasing its own tail. We’re no closer to finding a winner of this competition than we were two months ago and the only thing that has really changed is that Young is gone and that’s not even because of the show but rather him being Wellnessed. Young will be able to return in about two and a half weeks and he’ll probably be brought back and we’ll be right back where we were two weeks ago. Such is the life of NXT I guess.

Results
Yoshi Tatsu b. Tyler Reks – Top Rope Spinwheel Kick
Kaitlyn b. Maxine – Full Nelson Leglock
Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson b. JTG/Derrick Bateman – Clash of the Titus to Bateman

 

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NXT – October 12, 2011 – Watson Plays It Straight Much Better

NXT
Date: October 12, 2011
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jack Korpela, William Regal

It’s the second week of NXT on Wednesdays and I’m not exactly thrilled after last week’s boring show. It should be interesting to see how things go with no Darren Young for the next month or so due to him being wellnessed. Hopefully with the departure of all of the Pros that could mean we’re actually getting closer to the end of this show. Let’s get to it.

So if one of the rookies is Young, which one is wild?

Here are Bateman and Maxine to open the show. He sucks up to Vince and Johnny Ace for clearing up the catastrophe that was coming down to NXT. Bateman says that the opinions of himself and Maxine are the only ones that matter and makes fun of the hometown Cowboys. As a Cowboys fan……I don’t really care enough about Bateman to be upset about it.

Maxine talks a bit but is cut off by Titus and Percy. Percy talks about there being two rookies left so I guess Young is just being dropped? Bateman and Maxine run their mouths and kiss a bit which makes Percy freak out. O’Neil actually mentions the competition and says he should be on Raw or Smackdown. He’s right you know. Maxine implies she wants a match but here’s Striker who says he has match making abilities. It’s Watson vs. Bateman later and right now it’s AJ vs. Maxine.

AJ vs. Maxine

I think these are the only two girls on this show. This is joined in progress after a commercial with Maxine taking over with a choke for two. The fact of the week about Maxine: her cousin is a champion hula hooper from Bangkok and also grows prize turnips and also is an amateur credit mangler (not sure if that last part is right or not).

Maxine is totally dominant and goes from a dragon sleeper to a freaky looking chinlock. Literally all Maxine so far as the fans are into this. Either that or they’ve gotten really good at piping in noise on NXT. AJ finally gets in a shot and goes up for a cross body for one. After a bit more scrapping, a Shining Wizard beats Maxine at 5:00.

Rating: D. How could a match with women as attractive as AJ and Maxine that involves bending and twisting be so boring? There was nothing to see here which is at least partially because we’ve seen it so many times now. The girls are trying but there’s nothing to see here, especially with all of the stories they had going being forgotten now and things boiling down to they don’t like each other.

We talk about the tag match last week with Hawkins/Reks vs. the Usos.

Hawkins and Reks talk about how great they are and how they don’t need a family to get them here like the Usos do.

Long recap of Raw and all the stuff that went down on the night of a thousand stories.

Usos vs. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks

Hawkins starts with let’s call him Jey. The crowd is a lot quieter for this than for the girls. The twins control early and drop double headbutts on Hawkins for no cover as it’s off to Reks. Remember when Reks actually was on a Survivor Series team and a Bragging Rights team? That feels like it was so long ago. Back to Hawkins who gets beaten on even more, this time taking a two count off a Demolition Decapitator move. Hawkins is sent to the floor and Jey dives over the top to crush him. Jimmy does the same as we take a break.

Back with heel double teaming taking Jimmy down and it’s off to Reks. We hear about the tag division coming back up and that’s true for once. Know how they did it? They made teams. Why is that such a hard concept? You have a huge roster so why not throw some teams together? The double teaming goes on for a very long time as the match has totally changed after the break.

Regal goes on a small rant about Hawkins and Reks not being underutilized because it’s their job to get noticed, not someone else to give it to them. I like that idea that you have to have your own initiative to get into the thick of things like that. Reks puts on something like a Tazmission as Regal talks about how the mice are all throwing themselves onto mousetraps because his mother in law is coming.

Jimmy manages to send both of them to the floor and the fans wake up to an extent. There’s your hot tag to Jey and we get a Rikishi reference which might be the making a difference line. Jey hits the running hip strike to the head of Hawkins which is an Umaga move but they keep calling it a Rikishi one. Jey comes off the top rope but is caught in a powerslam for two. I thought that was it. Reks and Jey exchange missed finishers and a double superkick sets up a double Superfly splash for the pin on Reks at 12:20.

Rating: C. This had its moments but the heel beatdown segment was pretty long and dull. I wasn’t totally bored and the ending was a much better segment than the rest of it. I like that double splash and it’s cool to see the faces get some redemption (Oh I get it now) here. Good little match but if they cut out about two minutes it would have been much better.

Percy Watson vs. Derrick Bateman

Regal thinks Maxine is looking at him. Watson is so much better as a serious guy than the goofy one he was in Season 2. He takes over with his speed and power stuff but goes up to the middle rope and gets dropkicked in the back for two. Regal isn’t happy with the weak cover by Bateman. Now why can’t more commentators channel their inner Monsoon like that?

A whip into the corner gets two and it’s off to a body vice. We get the dreaded Jacob Novak reference and this show automatically drops a few notches. Watson fights back and a cross body gets two. Bateman takes over again and Regal is going into his third sage advice talk of the night. Abdominal stretch goes on by Bateman and we hear about Bateman getting his hands on a copy of John Cena’s workout strategy. Ok then.

Watson escapes and Regal praises Cena for a bit. Elbow misses for Derrick and we’re running very low on time so this is going to have to end soon. Watson hammers away and hits one of those dropkicks that is just a bit off for some reason. It always is. The spinning splash gets two. Bateman grabs a release gordbuster for two (with Regal talking about Arn a bit) but the falling bulldog is countered, allowing Watson to hit a fireman’s carry into a pancake for the pin at 7:00.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but it kind of came and went. Watson is so much better now that it’s not even funny. He needed to play things straight and that’s what he’s doing here. It works so much better for him this way and I could see him being a lower midcard guy on the main rosters. As for Bateman….just let us look at Maxine.

Overall Rating: C-. Pretty boring show tonight although the wrestling wasn’t bad. As is the custom around here, when they talk about the competition and have the rookies out there, the show goes downhill in a hurry. With Young gone though, at least we’re getting closer to having the end of the season. I guess the Redemption Points aren’t going to mean anything at all for the whole 30+ weeks this has been on are they? Weak show tonight but not horrible.

Results
AJ b. Maxine – Shining Wizard
Usos b. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks – Double Superfly Splash to Reks
Percy Watson b. Derrick Bateman – Fireman’s carry into a pancake




NXT – September 20, 2011 – AJ vs. Maxine III!!!!!!!

NXT
Date: September 20, 2011
Location: Wright State University Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Commentators: William Regal, Jack Korpela

I’m not going to bother talking about the competition or what week it is anymore until we get to a milestone or something like that. I’m not sure where they’re going to go with the stories as a lot of stuff was wrapped up last week. We have the old guys vs. the new guys still but that can only go so far. Regal and Striker got a pretty definitive win but I guess it’s time for the Uso Era now. Let’s get to it.

We open with the Percy Watson Show. He’s been back a week and he has a talk show? Anyway he brings out O’Neil with both guys being in suits. Titus talks about it being a long 29 weeks and says they should take a run at the tag titles after the season ends. Here are JTG and Young with a rebuttal. JTG says he’s a tag team specialist. It seems like JTG is Young’s pro now. Titus brings up the Usos running them off last week and JTG calls the Usos haters. Watson says he and Titus dress better and a tag match is made…I think. They brawl and Titus/Watson clears the ring.

AJ vs. Maxine

We get a clip from last week with the match they had already where Maxine won. Regal talks about Maxine’s uncle being a Peruvian hunchback pickpocket. He also makes saddles for seahorses. At least both chicks look good. Maxine controls early and grabs a chinlock. Off to a Liontamer with her foot on the head and that’s illegal apparently as the referee breaks it up. AJ grabs a pair of rollups for two each and Maxine takes over again.

Regal talks about pulling hair and Maxine puts on chinlock #3 of a four minute match. AJ tries to speed things up and Maxine’s shoulder goes into the post. Spin kick gets two for AJ. Maxine tries that same move she hit last week but AJ kicks her in the back and hits a Shining Wizard (called that by Regal) for the pin at 5:14.

Rating: D+. The ending was good but dude, three chinlocks in a five minute match? I mean is that really necessary? This is match #3 in the whole Where’s Horny story and it’s already boring. Granted when you have the same match over and over again it’s bound to get boring. This wasn’t anything special but it wasn’t totally horrible I guess.

HHH’s movie trailer and the Raw ReBound (all about Ryder/Jackman/Ziggler and zero about the firing or HHH etc) eat up a bunch of time.

Horny is in the back with a letter for AJ. Maxine comes in and implies sex between Tyson and AJ. Maxine keeps walking and finds Bateman and Kidd. Kidd leaves and Maxine says they’re this close to separating AJ and Horny. They make out.

Yoshi Tatsu vs. Derrick Bateman

Tatsu takes it to the mat and still has the paint on half of his face. Bateman chops away and Tatsu has white paint all over his chest. Yoshi drops a Muta style elbow for two and Bateman hits the floor. Tatsu gets sent into the post balls first and there’s paint on the mat now. He needs to look into some higher quality stuff. Back in the ring and Tatsu gets taken down by a clothesline for two. Bateman’s offense is pretty boring.

There’s an abdominal stretch but he shifts into a pumphandle backbreaker for two. Now Tatsu has the same stretch on Bateman but that’s quickly broken up. Tatsu fires away with strikes and a running kick in the corner and a big kick gets two. Cross body off the top gets two. Another attempt is rolled through for another two. A big kick puts Bateman down but Kidd runs in for the DQ at 6:43.

Rating: C. Not bad here but can we do something else besides Tatsu vs. Kidd? The matches are pretty good but have been going downhill a bit in recent weeks. Bateman is floundering at this point and needs something to do besides this pretty stupid love thing with Maxine/Titus/AJ. Not a terrible match, but where does this lead other than Tyson vs. Tatsu again?

AJ talks to Trent Barreta but Titus comes up and Trent leaves. Titus says make up with Horny but she’s not sure. Titus leaves and Horny is behind him. Horny leaves after shaking his head.

Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson vs. JTG/Darren Young

Percy vs. Young to start and Percy gets a butterfly suplex for two. Off to Titus who powers down Young with ease. And now we’re talking about Air Boom. Watson throws on an armbar and it’s off to Titus again. All Watson/O’Neil here. Young is thrown to the floor as we take a break. Back with Watson beating up JTG. Regal thinks Young might have cauliflower ear from going to the floor. JTG is sent to the floor and talks some trash to Regal but turns around into a baseball slide.

Young FINALLY gets a shot in on Watson for their first offense after about seven minutes. It’s Watson taking the beatdown here from Young with something like a weak camel clutch. And never mind as JTG comes in and talks too much trash, allowing Watson to get his foot up. He can’t make a tag though as the match keeps going.

Young cheats a bit and Regal starts coaching him before he realizes what he’s doing. Korpela: “Hold the phone.” Regal: “What phone?” Regal also says that he thinks Young is ahead of all the rookies. Watson takes Young down and gets Titus in for the comeback. He tries what looks to be a spinebsuter but settles for an atomic drop instead. We actually get a Who Let The Dogs Out line from Korpela. The numbers catch up with Titus and a fireman’s carry into a gutbuster ends Titus at 12:00. That’s a surprise.

Rating: C. Not a bad main event but as always with NXT, there’s the problem of the same stuff happening week after week and nothing ever developing out of it. It’s not a bad match but is this ever going anywhere? If it is I certainly don’t see it. I guess this is supposed to set up the Usos vs. Young/JTG but are we supposed to look forward to that now?

Post match the Usos come in and hit their double splash on the winners, ending the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Eh this was just kind of there. It’s like they took a look back at some of the stuff last week and wanted to make sure we really got it so they aired it again. The Usos being on there is almost a guarantee of our main event next week. Not a bad show but it was pretty boring and there was little that made me want to watch next week. AJ and Horny are pretty boring but that’s NXT for you. Not horrible but weaker than last week.

Results
AJ b. Maxine – Shining Wizard
Yoshi Tatsu b. Derrick Bateman via DQ with Tyson Kidd interfered
Darren Young/JTG b. Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson – Gutbuster to O’Neil




NXT – September 13, 2011 – God Help Me I’m Starting To Like This

NXT
Date: September 13, 2011
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Commentators: William Regal, Jack Korpela

With this episode, we’re officially as long as seasons one and two combined and longer than three and four combined. I mean dude, really? Do we really need 28 weeks of this show? I know I say this a lot but I’m still waiting on any reason for this thing to keep going on. The stories aren’t bad but they’re pretty low level issues. I’d bet on Striker/Regal vs. JTG/Young either tonight or next week. Let’s get to it.

Regal and Striker open the show talking about hockey in Canada and here are Young and JTG to break it up. “Hockey isn’t even a real sport.” Striker: “I will cross check you in the head.” The audio is a bit messed up and it sounds like they’re in a tunnel. Striker says Regal is better than both of them and Regal wants a translation of what JTG just said. They talk about respect and just get to the tag match already. After about four minutes, there it is. Regal says he is STRAIGHT UP GANGSTA TRIPPIN! He puts on JTG’s hat and we have our price of admission right there.

Bateman and Kidd vs. O’Neil and a mystery partner up next. Gee, could it be the guy Kidd has been feuding with for two months?

Derrick Bateman/Tyson Kidd vs. Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson

….oh joy. They’re bringing back SOMEONE ELSE now. Also Titus has his own music now. I don’t get the Watson idea though. I mean….why? He has no connection to this match or this feud but here he is on NXT. I’m trying to come up with people they haven’t brought back yet and no one is coming to me. Korpela says Watson used to play in the NFL. He hits an enziguri to Kidd for two. Bateman distracts Percy and the heels take over.

Bateman, called a big man, hits a dropkick off the apron to put Watson down again. They work him over in the ring with Kidd working a front facelock. Jack wants to know where Horny is. He’d be the last Pro to leave so it would fit perfectly. Off to Bateman with a one armed camel clutch. I guess that’s the one hump version. Tag to Kidd who hits a dropkick to Percy while he’s in the double hump version.

Percy snaps off a really high dropkick to put Kidd down. Regal forgets his name but the hot tag to Titus makes it a moot point anyway. He cleans house and runs over Bateman a few times. A slam gets two as Tyson comes off the top with an elbow to the back of the head. Bateman gets two off that but walks into the Clash of the Titus for the pin at 7:06. I’ve said it time after time but just put Titus on the main roster already, because remember that if/when he wins this, he has to go through Season 6 and compete against guys like Tyler Black which puts him at an unfair disadvantage.

Rating: C-. Pretty basic match here but it’s getting hard to keep coming up with reasons for these matches to take place. Again, what is Watson’s connection to this? Why would Titus pick him as a partner? I know he’s been on Superstars a bit but if he can just call up anyone, why not someone like Tatsu who has been against Kidd and has experience with him? I don’t get this show most of the time. The match was just ok.

AJ can’t get ahold of Horny and is tired of talking to his voicemail. She’s worried about him. Maxine comes up and she asks where is he. Maxine suggests he went to Palm Springs with the Bellas. If that winds up being true, I might die of happiness. She has a picture on her phone and AJ doesn’t believe it. This is kind of awesome actually. AJ leaves and Maxine says Photoshop is great.

AJ vs. Maxine

Maxine does look better as a blonde. Regal tells us that Maxine’s father is a master cobbler and an amateur ventriloquist. That’s either a completely true story or Regal is a genius. Now he’s telling a story about a pair of conjoined twins he dated that drove to England on vacation from America. I’m cracking up at his delivery. Maxine works on a chinlock/choke and Regal wants her to be ex-wife #17 but she’s too good looking for him.

All Maxine so far as Regal asks if the beautiful Divas worry about getting kicked in the face. It doesn’t matter to him because he looked pretty with a broken nose. AJ is very flexible and I can’t say I’m complaining. A spinning middle rope cross body gets two. She catches a kick from Maxine and hits a spinewheel kick for two. Maxine puts her in a fireman’s carry and drops her across the top rope before hitting a jawbreaker kind of move for the pin at 5:45.

Rating: D+. The match sucked but the commentary makes up for some of it here. Regal is absolutely priceless on a show like this where he isn’t being listened to or yelled at and can say whatever he wants and get away with it. The commentators are a lot funnier than they’re given credit for. Listen to shows like this or the old PPVs from England and you’ll hear totally different people than you’re used to.

William Regal/Matt Striker vs. Darren Young/JTG

It’s about 10:35 when this starts so they have a lot of time. Oh my goodness Michael Cole is coming out for commentary. Regal vs. JTG to start. The fans are behind Regal and we get an old school criss-cross. Like any good face, Regal stops and cheers JTG on then throws him over the top. Young is put in Shattered Dreams position and Regal/Striker pick JTG up and battering ram him into the balls of Young. That takes us to a break.

Back with Cole calling Korpela Jim instead of Jack. He bashes the main event and Regal gets an awesome bridge to get out of a top wristlock. Cole is blasting both teams other than Regal so at least he’s not playing complete favorites. He has literally not shut up since we came back from the break. You have to give him this: the guy has energy and doesn’t phone it in.

Striker gets beaten down by JTG as Cole runs down WWE for paying for Striker and Korpela to fly from show to show. He does however slip up and mention that McMahon is still in charge. Cole has still not shut up and is now talking about breakfast expenses run up by Korpela and Striker. I’m dying listening to this. Korpela tries to talk about the match and the story behind it but Cole is on a roll.

Cole says people on the street are talking about Darren Young. If they’re on the street how do they get internet access to watch the show? It’s been all JTG/Young beating on Striker since the break if you care about the match. If you do I’d recommend a head examination but have it your way. Cole is going on about hockey and how much the Maple Leafs suck now and it’s hot tag to Regal. Everything breaks down as Regal and JTG head to the floor. This isn’t good for Striker as he can’t beat Young. Now Cole is going off about Striker’s tan and Young rolls up Striker into that fireman’s carry gutbuster for the pin at 11:05.

Rating: C. Again, the match was totally unimportant but I was dying of laughter listening to Cole. He had such passion out there and went on so many rants that he won me over. The match itself was just there like any other NXT main event. If you have the chance and are bored, check this out for Cole’s commentary. I really found it funny and it’s not like this is a title match on Raw where it actually matters, so I don’t have as much of an issue with it.

Post match the Usos of all people come out to beat down JTG and Young. No reason, no explanation, they’re just there. That ends the show.

Overall Rating: B. I don’t know if it’s because I’m tired and a bit sore, but I had a great time with this show. If you forget the NXT competition and the fact that this has been going on for about six and a half months now, this is one of the most enjoyable shows you can find.

It’s a combination of people not caring because they know no one is watching and basic stories that are working (to as much of a degree as they can on this show) and it’s starting to work. It’s kind of like a lower level territorial indy company like an old OVW that is working week to week with whatever talent they can get their hands on and it’s actually starting to work. God help me it’s starting to work.

Results
Titus O’Neil/Percy Watson b. Tyson Kidd/Derrick Bateman – Clash of the Titus to Bateman
Maxine b. AJ – Jawbreaker
JTG/Darren Young b. William Regal/Matt Striker – Fireman’s carry into a gutbuster to Striker