Bash at the Beach 1999
Date: July 11, 1999
Location: National Car Rental Center, Fort Lauderdale, Florida
Attendance: 13,624
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

We’re going in a new direction at this point in WCW as the promotion has gone from really boring to freaking insane in the course of a few weeks. A good chunk of this show was booked within the last few weeks and knowing the stories isn’t likely going to help me get through it. Let’s get to it.

I’ve actually seen this show far more often than I should as I found it at a Blockbuster for $2 when I was about thirteen. It took many years to suppress those memories but here we go again.

The opening video is a wordless montage about the four men in the main event. I mean, if there’s one story that doesn’t need a verbal explanation, it’s one about Savage and Sid trying to kill Nash and then the heroic champion kidnapping and potentially raping Gorgeous George, causing Savage to throw her out of their dressing room with a side plot of Sting potentially driving the Hummer that nearly killed Nash and then Nash changing the rules of the tag match so that anyone, including his partner, can pin him for the title. Also for some reason they air the video then show it about five more times as a very fast speed.

Tony says the tag match tonight started as a tag match. It was once going to be Sting/Nash vs. Savage/Sid in a tag team match, but it’s now Sting/Nash vs. Savage/Sid in a tag team match. No that’s not a misprint.

After those words of wisdom, Schiavone explains the junkyard match and the boxing match before throwing it to Gene for a Hotline ad.

Mike Tenay is at the junkyard, which he knows about because his sources told him where to go. Apparently there’s going to be a ring of cars with a bunch of obstacles to get around and the first person to jump over a fence and escape wins. This company is rapidly becoming more of a parody of wrestling than an actual wrestling promotion.

Video on the Cat vs. Disco Inferno. Cat had a kickboxing match with Jerry Flynn and lost via DQ so Flynn took him down in a brawl after the match. He and Disco had a dance off a week earlier, making the kickboxing stuff completely pointless.

Disco Inferno vs. The Cat

The original stipulation was the loser could never dance again but that has since been dropped. The lawyers must be working overtime as the match was announced three days ago and the stipulation was never mentioned on Thunder. Miller rants before the match and wants another dance contest before we get going. He demands that the people all vote for him or else he’ll beat them all up. Tony explains that he’ll lose because he threatened the fans because WCW thinks we’re rather thick headed. Disco dances for about two seconds before Cat goes after him and we’re ready to go.

Inferno starts like a kitchen of fire (not enough for a whole house) and sends Miller sliding out to the floor. Back in and Cat nails a few kicks, so Disco just tackles him to the mat and hammers away. Some atomic drops from Disco set up some miscommunication on what looked to be his swinging neckbreaker.

Cat comes back with a kick to the head and walks around as Sonny gets in a few shots of his own. Those are as effective as you would expect since Sonny, a legitimately accomplished karate fighter, is a manager and therefore incapable of hurting anyone. Back in and Disco grabs a quick sunset flip for two but gets his head kicked off again.

Another kick misses though and Disco legsweeps him down, setting up a middle rope elbow for two. Cat rakes the eyes and puts on the shoe, only to have Disco take it away and blast him in the face. Sonny’s distraction makes it only a two count though, allowing Cat to put the shoe back on and kick Disco for about the fifth time for the pin.

Rating: D. This really was the best thing they could think of to start a show? It’s really hard to care about a match with no build, no value and nothing beyond basic moves. The fact that it had Ernest Miller in there made things even less interesting. It’s not even a horrible match or anything, but there’s just no reason to care about something like that.

Judge Mills Lane won’t put up with any garbage tonight and will chase Bagwell or Piper if need be.

We recap the TV Title match. The video starts with Van Hammer surviving against Disco Inferno because the referee was down and a handful of tights. Then Flair saved Hammer from getting put through a table by banning hardcore matches, allowing Hammer to hit Hugh Morrus with a table and drive him through it. Somehow that earned him a TV Title shot here.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Van Hammer

Keep in mind that there really isn’t a face in this match as there’s no reason to like either guy. Steiner comes out first for no apparent reason. They trade hard shots to the face to start and Steiner is knocked out to the floor. Steiner goes into his new standard of just driving someone down to the mat and ripping at their face a lot. Back up and Rick hammers away before taking Hammer outside to send him into the barricade.

Rick hits a horrible looking DDT on the exposed concrete and covers on the floor to continue getting on my nerves. Back in and Hammer hits him low, only to have Rick punch him in the face to take over again. They head outside one more time with Hammer nailing him in the head with a chair before taking him back inside for the Alabama Slam for two. Steiner bites him between the legs, punts him in the same spot (referee just watches him) and hits the Steiner Bulldog to retain.

Rating: F. Rick Steiner has reached the point where he’s an embarrassment. Between never selling anything from a chair shot to a low blow, there’s just nothing Hammer (who isn’t the guy you want carrying a bag of groceries, let alone a PPV title match) can do. What WCW saw in him other than name recognition I’ll never know, but if someone thinks he’s skilled in the ring, they have no business being in charge of a wrestling company.

We get an overhead view of the junkyard, which really just looks like a parking lot with a bunch of cars stacked up in a circle. The winner gets a trophy but Tenay can’t answer who is going to be in the match because it’s unsanctioned.

We recap David Flair being named US Champion, meaning we just see the segment again. Again, weren’t the Flairs fighting months ago about David siding with Torrie and having his father hold him down? Now David has ten women around him (including Torrie) and his dad made him US Title. That’s a big jump in the span of five months.

US Title: Dean Malenko vs. David Flair

David is defending of course and comes out with Torrie, in a very pushed up tied off top, shirt that might be nine inches long, and a black cowboy hat. Ric, Arn and Asya are here too but Johnny Boone is refereeing. Tony says David hasn’t been impressive in all of his title defenses. You know, all one of them.

Dean of course throws him down with ease and stomps away in the corner before planting David with a suplex. Ric comes in but gets decked as Dean puts on the Cloverleaf. Anderson nails the referee with a spinebuster, allowing Robinson to take over as referee. Dean Cloverleafs Asya but Ric nails him with the US Title to give David the pin.

Rating: F. Dang it this was just long enough to grade. As I said in the Nitro review, I get the idea they’re going for here, but wasn’t there another scrub you could put in there instead of Malenko? I know Dean isn’t going to be headlining a PPV anytime soon, but he’s the kind of guy that should actually be the US Champion. This kind of story is good in the right circumstances, but WCW isn’t in a place where they can turn yet another title into a joke and keep beating their midcard guys into the ground, even in a match that doesn’t end anywhere near clean.

Long recap of the Rednecks vs. the No Limit Soldiers, complete with the full I Hate Rap video. Barry Windham is such a talented drummer that he just scares the drums into playing themselves because he certainly isn’t hitting them. This includes a lot of shouting HOOTY HOO, which amazingly enough didn’t get the rappers over. Master P. is long gone, apparently saying that there weren’t enough of “his people” in the audience for the night the angle took off. That would be in P.’s hometown in New Orleans if you aren’t big on guys who shout like owls.

No Limit Solders vs. West Texas Rednecks

Swoll, B.A., Rey Mysterio Jr., Konnan

Curt Hennig, Barry Windham, Kendall Windham, Bobby Duncum Jr.

Elimination tag, which I believe is the first explanation of the rules for this match. The best part of this: the camera comes back to the arena early, showing ring announcer David Penzer counting the fans down on when to cheer. Tony fails at covering for him by saying that he was saying hi to his five family members in the audience. The levels that this company falls to when trying to cover their mistakes is astounding. Heenan redeems things a bit by saying that the Soldiers’ problem could be solved if they just put a light in their closets. Rey and Konnan make sure to shout a lot before we’re ready to go.

Mysterio and Barry get things going with the Cruiserweight Champion getting hammered down in the corner. Rey comes back by sending Barry into the corner and getting two off a split legged moonsault. Off to Hennig vs. B.A. with Armstrong nailing a dropkick before trying to talk some trash. Thankfully that goes nowhere as it’s off to Duncum before the big Swoll comes in with a bad looking clothesline. Swoll hammers on Duncum but Kendall comes in with a cheap shot to take over.

Kendall misses a charge into the post so Mysterio comes in without a tag. Naturally the referee is fine with this. Kendall tries to beat the rules into him but Rey nails him with a springboard seated senton to knock both Kendall and Duncum out to the floor. Back in and it’s Konnan vs. Hennig before Rey hits another springboard seated senton on Hennig. Duncum and Hennig both get hammered in the corner until it’s Swoll ducking Duncum’s cross body for two in an awkward sequence. Rey adds a springboard legdrop and Swoll pins Bobby.

The other Soldiers, Chase and 4×4 (who makes Ezekiel Jackson look like David Flair) beat up Duncum in the aisle because they’re heroes. Barry and Konnan hammer away on each other until Curt comes back in for a double clothesline. Off to BA as the Rednecks keep control with Curt nailing a quick HennigPlex to make it 3-3. Mysterio tried to dive in for a save but came in too fast and basically started crawling in slow motion for no logical reason.

So it’s Konnan getting beaten down now with Kendall hitting a bad looking lariat and a slightly better looking slam. He misses a middle rope knee though and Konnan hits a rolling lariat of his own (called a DDT by Tony), followed by the facebuster for two. Rey dropkicks Kendall into a horrible “rollup” for the pin on Kendall. Barry DDTs Konnan for two as 4×4 and Chase beat up Kendall.

Everything breaks down with Barry going to the floor…..and being carried off by Chase with Konnan following. For some reason this isn’t a DQ and both guys are counted out. So it’s Hennig vs. Swoll/Mysterio. Swoll comes in for some incredibly sloppy offense as Barry comes back in. Curt tries to bail but 4×4 stops him in his tracks. Back in and Swoll hits his stupid palm strike to the chest before bringing in Rey for the Jimmy Snuka/Andre the Giant big splash off the shoulders for the pin.

Rating: C-. Swoll is horrible. Like he’s really, really bad, to the point that he can barely throw punches correctly. I understand that he was really new at this, but as WCW should have learned over the years, that’s why he shouldn’t be on a major show like this. The Soldiers continue to act entirely like heels here, just like they have for most of this feud.

The announcers chat for a bit about the rest of the card.

We get Hak’s challenge for the junkyard match.

Junkyard Invitational

Ciclope, Jerry Flynn, Johnny Grunge, Hak, Horace Hogan, Brian Knobs, Hugh Morrus, La Parka, Lord Steven Regal, Fit Finlay, Rocco Rock, Silver King, Squire David Taylor, and Mikey Whipwreck

They’re in a junkyard, first person to climb over a fence wins. The place is huge so there’s almost no way to see more than four or five people at once unless you go to a helicopter shots. Public Enemy (a surprise) flips a car over as I’m only going to be able to call big spots. There are barrels of fire everywhere. Jerry Flynn puts an electrical cord into an engine to make sparks fly out. Knobbs dives off one car for an elbow onto King on the roof of a van.

Finlay hits la Parka in the ribs with a bumper as Dave Taylor hits Morrus in the head with a trashcan lid. The annoyed look on Morrus’ face as he just keeps walking is rather amusing. The camera shots are only lasting about ten seconds at most so it’s hard to call much of anything. Jimmy Hart is running around in a yellow shirt and a hard hat. Rocco Rock is thrown into the window of a van. Morrus dives off a car with an elbow onto Rock because they’re already repeating spots.

I think Ciclope dives off a car onto about six guys before they start throwing things at each other instead of doing anything coherent. Finlay goes Captain America by blocking a punch with a trashcan lid and hitting Horace in the face with it. Brian wraps Taylor in a tire as we’re waiting on someone to try and win. Rocco and Horace make the first trip over with Horace making a last second save to keep Rock from escaping.

Silver King is bleeding from the arm as this just keeps going. Taylor has to dance out of a tire before Knobs and Hak put Finlay in a car. A forklift pops up and takes the car over to the crusher but Finlay gets out to prevent death. Of course the forklift hasn’t been seen all match until this point. Then another car blows up and Finlay climbs over the fence to win.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling, and quite frankly I’m really not sure what it was. Why in the world WCW thought this was a good idea is beyond me and I’m sure the live audience is going to be THRILLED after having sat there for fifteen minutes waiting on this to end. On top of all that, Finlay would hurt his leg soon after this at a house show (in a hardcore match of course) and be out for months, making the whole thing worthless. I can’t imagine he’s the only one to get injured in this mess either.

We recap the Triad vs. Saturn/Benoit. They fought each other, then they fought each other some more, then they had some singles matches, now they’re having a title match. For some reason we get a bunch of clips of the eight man tag from Nitro which doesn’t seem to be going anywhere, other than a boxing match. They’re trying to tie this into the old vs. new feud, which doesn’t even seem to be a thing anymore.

Tag Team Titles: Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn vs. Jersey Triad

The Triad is defending. Kanyon starts on the floor as Saturn and Page slug it out in the middle. It’s Saturn taking over with a bunch of right hands before knocking Bigelow and Kanyon off the apron for good measure. Off to Bigelow vs. Benoit as the announcers call Benoit an uncrowned champion. Hasn’t he been a three time champion by this point? Bam Bam gets dropped into the middle buckle and sent out to the floor for a meeting with his partners.

Back in and Kanyon fights out of a suplex from Saturn and knees him down against the ropes. He grabs the referee to block a German attempt, only to have Benoit chop him into a t-bone. Back to Benoit for the decapitation clothesline followed by a Liontamer (which he used before Jericho). A double clothesline drops Kanyon for two more as the challengers stay in full control. Benoit stomps Kanyon down in the corner and starts in on his leg.

Saturn drops a top rope legdrop for two but Page comes in without a tag to take over, sending Saturn to the floor for a triple team to take over. Bigelow comes in for a big suplex and a falling headbutt for two. Back to Kanyon after Bigelow uses Flair’s “how much time is left” trick. Kanyon drops a leg for one of the slowest two counts I can remember in a long time. The fans get distracted by something in the crowd so Bigelow puts Saturn in a chinlock.

Kanyon comes back in but gets crotched on the top, setting up a belly to belly superplex from Saturn. Benoit gets the hot tag and goes after Bigelow, only to have Page take him down with a top rope clothesline. Page is VERY pleased with this move, running out to the floor and celebrating like a mad man, even climbing onto the barricade. Back in and Page gets two off an elbow drop before it’s off to Bigelow for some fat man offense.

Page comes in again and runs Benoit over for two with Saturn making the save. We get a front chancery from Page but Benoit drives him into the corner for the hot tag, which of course the referee doesn’t see. That wicked sitout powerbomb from Page is good for two. Benoit finally suplexes Kanyon down but Bigelow breaks up a hot tag attempt. Bam Bam misses the moonsault though and we FINALLY get the hot tag to Saturn (which the camera doesn’t catch).

Saturn cleans house with suplexes and clotheslines Page and Kanyon out to the floor. Everything breaks down again and Saturn hits a top rope splash, followed by the Swan Dive from Benoit but Page comes in off the top for the save. Saturn loads Page up with the Death Valley Driver but Kanyon throws powder in his face, only to have it get in Page’s eyes too, causing him to Diamond Cut Kanyon. Bigelow makes the save but Benoit Germans Page for a VERY close two. Page throws in a metal trashcan as the referee gets bumped. He hits Kanyon by mistake but Bigelow comes in for a 3D on Saturn to retain the titles.

Rating: B+. Give that match a less messy finish and it’s a classic. There was a lot of good stuff in here and the majority of it was due to how much time they were given. Everyone was allowed to get in there for awhile and the fans bought into the idea of two guys trying to fight against the big cheating team. They gave it a great effort and the whole thing just worked. Really good stuff here, though not enough to save this disaster of the show.

Clip of Judge Mills Lane agreeing to referee the boxing match. That’s all of the recap because there was no reason for this to be a boxing match other than Piper barely being a wrestler anymore.

Roddy Piper vs. Buff Bagwell

Big time boxing referee Mills Lane is referee here to try to make people care. In case you’ve never seen him, just picture Mr. Strickland from Back to the Future. Piper has Flair in his corner. Buff’s gloves are actually labeled “Buff’s Left” and “Buff’s Right”. Bagwell sees Flair in Piper’s corner, so he has someone to have his back: HIS MOM, “Judge Judy” Bagwell. And I give up. Seriously it was bad enough when this was boxing instead of Piper just doing a freaking job for Bagwell like he should be doing, but now BUFF’S MOM IS HERE???

Flair gives Bagwell a chance to leave but Buff reminds him of the pin off the Blockbuster a few weeks back. You know, when Flair put Bagwell over in the middle of the ring in the whole point of this entire story. The rounds are two minutes long here. Piper sticks his chin out to start until Buff hammers him into the corner. The fans are dead at this point if you couldn’t guess. Bagwell tees off on Piper (well, as much as he can BECAUSE HE ISN’T A BOXER) to end the first round.

Flair sprays something on Piper’s gloves in between the rounds as this continues to fall apart. Piper hits a few jabs to the face and Bagwell’s eyes are burning. He gets punched down in the corner as Judy brings over a sponge to try and clean Buff’s eyes out. Back up and Piper wildly swings until Buff knocks Piper down in the corner in an identical sequence from Piper vs. Mr. T. thirteen years ago, because that’s what this is supposed to be….a tribute to I suppose? Piper gets up as round two ends.

I’m going to pause for a second here and give you a bit of context to what is about to happen. Fifteen months ago, WCW was still in control of the Monday Night Wars and hadn’t lost a night in the ratings in nearly two years. Their last win was about nine months before this. Yeah they were in trouble, but it’s not like they were so desperate for something good to happen that they had to go insane. A few weeks back, Buff Bagwell hit his finishing move and pinned Ric Flair in the middle of the ring on Nitro, which should have been the start of a huge push for him. After all that, I give you the third round of this boxing match.

Piper jumps Bagwell in the corner and attacks Bagwell early, so his mother Judy gets in the ring and bites Piper’s ear. She then dumps the spit bucket over Piper’s head as Buff punches Flair off the apron. Buff goes up and hits the Blockbuster on Piper as Judy holds Flair on the apron, allowing Buff to pin Piper for the win. Judy chases the President of WCW around the ring after the match.

Rating: G. As in below an F and for GOOD FREAKING GRIEF THEY REALLY COULDN’T COME UP WITH ANYTHING BETTER THAN THIS??? Piper wasn’t capable of doing a five minute match and doing a job for Bagwell? Does WCW really think that it’s important enough to protect him from taking a fall in a wrestling match that they’ll let him take a fall in a boxing match? Read that sentence back and see how insane it sounds. Now throw in Judy Bagwell and more hijinks than an episode of Looney Tunes and you see what happened to WCW in the summer of 1999.

We recap Nash/Sting vs. Savage/Sid. Savage being a woman beater and Nash potentially raping George is glossed over. On the other hand, the Fake Sting attacking Nash, causing Nash to go after Sting, even though the real Sting came out to beat up the Fake Sting, is left out with only the Fake Sting beating Nash down being shown. For some reason Nash wanted this to be a tag team match where anyone, including his partner, could pin him for the title. Again, this isn’t mentioned in the video. We’ll also ignore Nash saying he saw Sting driving the Hummer before we see that happening in the package.

WCW World Title: Sid Vicious/Randy Savage vs. Kevin Nash/Sting

Nash is defending in what is more like a handicap fatal fourway than a tag match if that makes sense. In theory Sting can only pin Nash for the title, meaning it’s basically one on one on two. Thankfully Tony mentions the whole Sting can pin Nash and the real Sting coming out during the entrances. Yes, we’ve reached the point where Tony Schiavone is having to cover for the production team’s goofs.

George (living up to the gorgeous moniker tonight) comes out in sunglasses but takes them off to reveal a black eye as she goes to stand in Nash’s corner. The reason for the black eye isn’t explained because that really wasn’t something that should have happened, nor is it even referenced by the announcers. Savage and Sting start but Randy sees George changing corners and freaks out. Sting uses the chance to deck Savage and the fight is slowly on.

Off to Sid to face Sting as Tony explains the rules, making this match even more confusing that it was in the first place. Sting quickly knocks Sid out to the floor but Nash isn’t interested in tagging. So in theory, if Nash doesn’t get pinned, he doesn’t lose the title? It’s not like we’ve ever gotten a clear answer to that, though to be fair I doubt WCW thought it that far through. Sid and Savage start double teaming Sting with the big man putting on a bad looking camel clutch.

Savage comes in and spits at the champ, but thankfully doesn’t hit his hair. Sting finally rolls away and makes the tag to Nash for all the usual offense. He has Savage in trouble but gives Sting a very hard tag to get out. Sting takes it outside and splashes the barricade before Savage takes him back inside for some choking. Tony points out that almost no one has tries to pin Nash yet, making the whole stipulation rather pointless.

Sid hooks one of the lamest chinlocks I’ve ever seen on Sting, who is nice enough to go down to the mat in a heap. Granted he might have fainted after hearing some of the nonsense they actually aired on this show. Sting fights up again and does the falling low blow spot, allowing for the hot tag off to Nash.

Everything breaks down and the girls come in, only to have Sting splash both of them plus Sid. Savage and Nash get splashed at the same time, allowing Sid to plant Sting with a chokeslam. George gets in and low blows Nash (SHOCK AND AWE, SHOCK AND AWE), setting up the big elbow from Savage for the pin and the title.

Rating: D-. I wonder if they bothered to tell everyone else in the match about the whole Sting can pin Nash rule, because it was NEVER attempted and was a complete non factor. George’s face turn (can you even call it that?) lasted all of twelve minutes, meaning she’s picking the woman beater over the kidnapper and potential rapist. I can’t believe I just had to type that, so I’ll wrap it up by saying it’s a horrible match.

Overall Rating: F. The fact that a REALLY good twenty three minute Tag Team Title match is needed to bring this show up to a failure tells you all you need to know. This show had eight matches. One of them was a joke with David Flair needing an army to beat Malenko, one wasn’t wrestling because it was a big fight in a junkyard, and one was a boxing match. Two of the others were matches that belonged on Thunder at best, another one was a boring elimination tag, and one MADE NO FREAKING SENSE.

This show blew my mind in ways that I honestly didn’t think were possible. Just let some of this stuff sink in for a few minutes. Roddy Piper apparently can’t be trusted in a five minute match, we can’t have a DQ anymore because Rick Steiner wouldn’t be able to have a match break 10 seconds if we did, and we have to drop stipulations that are made less than three days before the match. WCW is dying before our eyes and it’s kind of amazing to see in a morbid way.

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Thunder
Date: July 8, 1999
Location: Jefferson County Civic Center, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

It’s the last show before Bash at the Beach and things have gone from boring to completely insane. Thankfully this is one of the live shows which are usually far better, especially than next week’s episode where it will have been taped before the PPV, meaning they can’t spoil anything. Let’s get to it.

The announcers recap Sunday’s main event tag match.

Clips of the main event stuff from Monday which is still disturbing.

Here’s Big Kev with something to say. He’s been looking at the video from Nitro and is now sure that Sting was in on it. Therefore, using his power as champ, he’s making Sunday’s tag match a title match, meaning anyone, including Sting, can pin him for the title. Why they don’t just make it a four way is beyond me but seeing how much they can screw this up should be interesting.

Dean Malenko comes into the Oval Office and yells at Flair for breaking up their PPV match due to a bad back. Flair says it’s from carrying this company for the last twelve years. Anderson and Malenko bicker for a bit before Flair says that Dean may be the Man of 1000 Holds, but he’s not Ric Flair. Point to the Nature Boy.

Clip from Nitro of Eddie’s hunt for a thief.

Lenny Lane vs. Eddie Guerrero

Lodi’s sign: “If you can read this, you ARE NOT from Alabama.” They lock up to start and Lenny bails to the corner for a hug. Back in and Eddie fires off punches and uppercuts followed by a pair of dropkicks. Eddie throws him into the corner but gets backdropped to the apron, kicking the referee down in the process. With the referee down, the luchadors Eddie forced to unmask on Monday come out to beat Eddie down, giving Lenny the fluke pin.

Rating: D+. Thank goodness this is for a story, but you can see that Guerrero isn’t going to get any higher up the card than being the big star who is stuck in the Cruiserweight division. The story is interesting and ties back into the LWO stuff (in a way), but Eddie should be higher up the card than he is and that’s just not happening.

Jimmy Hart is in the back and invites La Parka and Silver King to join the Hardcore Invitational on Sunday.

Disco is in the ring with Gene and talks about his match on Sunday with Ernest Miller. Why they’re fighting isn’t made clear but Disco makes Mr. Miyagi and Tae-Bo jokes before promising a Brooklyn, New York beating.

Van Hammer vs. Al Green

They fight into the corner to start until Green grabs a slap to take over. Hammer throws him across the ring in response and clotheslines him out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Hammer kicks him in the face for two. The Alabama Slam and cobra clutch slam is good for the pin on Green. This was nothing.

Rick Steiner runs in and beats Hammer down post match.

Jimmy Hart tries to get Horace into the junkyard as well.

We get the Bret video from Monday.

Most of Bret’s promo from Monday.

Brian Knobbs vs. Fit Finlay

Finlay jumps him to start but is quickly sent to the floor and into the steps. Jimmy Hart (he’s a busy guy tonight) gets in a few cheap shots of his own but Finlay is able to reverse a whip into the barricade. He sends Brian into the post and goes for a table, drawing in Hugh Morrus and Jerry Flynn for the DQ.

Regal, La Parka, Silver King, Horace and Dave Taylor all come out to brawl. Remember people, this is to preview a match in a junkyard. Like, a real junkyard.

Gene is in the ring with Flair and all of his associates. Piper talks about Peter McNeley (a guy Mike Tyson knocked out in 30 seconds) making Bagwell look good this coming Sunday. Buff asked for the match (no he didn’t) because Piper would kill him in a wrestling match. Flair talks about his match with Dean being canceled (despite it never being announced on the main shows) so instead, Dean gets a US Title shot. That’s quite the punishment. If Dean loses on Sunday, Gene gets a night with Asya. Ok then.

Rap Is Crap video.

This Week in WCW Motorsports, now with Ricky Rachman.

Disco Inferno vs. Kidman

Kidman scores with a quick dropkick and clothesline. His Fameasser is countered though and Disco nails a clothesline of his own. A wristlock goes nowhere so they head outside as we hear that Regal is now in the junkyard match. That match sounds like it could be so bad that it’s amazing.

Kidman scores with a dive but Disco grabs an atomic drop back inside, only to charge into a boot. You know you would think a match with these two would be a bit more entertaining. Kidman hits a high cross body and the Low Down for two. Cue Sonny and the Cat as Kidman gets two off a top rope bulldog. Not that it matters as Cat kicks Kidman with the red shoe for the disqualification.

Rating: D+. Every time they get close to giving me something to care about, we get something like Sonny Onoo to screw it up. What happened to Kidman anyway? Oh that’s right: this company is more about screaming HOOTY HOO than having Rey and Kidman tear the house down every night. Also, can we get a match to break five minutes tonight?

Disco lays out Cat post match.

The Triad comes out and says they’ll win on Sunday because Benoit and Saturn have never come close to beating them.

Chris Benoit vs. Kanyon

This HAS to be better. Kanyon goes after him in the corner but gets taken down with chops. Benoit runs him over again but Kanyon rakes him in the eyes. That’s fine with Benoit who snaps off a suplex to send Kanyon rolling out to the floor. We get a chase around the ring with Kanyon getting in first and stomping on the Canadian, only to eat more chops as a result.

They head outside again but WAIT A MINUTE. Jimmy Hart has gotten Mikey Whipwreck into the junkyard match. We’re still not done with anything but the match as Tenay talks about Team Madness going insane in the back because they can’t be on camera. Kanyon suplexes Benoit on the floor and takes him back inside, only for Benoit to fire off more chops.

Back up and Kanyon headbutts him down, setting up a middle rope Fameasser for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Benoit fights up, only to have his powerbomb countered into a sitout version from Kanyon for another near fall. Kanyon heads up top, only to get caught in a superplex to put both guys down. Back up and Benoit starts rolling Germans, only to get drilled in the face with an elbow.

Cue Bigelow with a title belt but Benoit whips Kanyon into the big guy to knock him off the apron. Chris loads up the Swan Dive but gets shoved off by Bam Bam. Now Saturn comes out to even things up but gets whipped into the barricade. Benoit hooks the Crossface but has to avoid Bigelow’s flying headbutt. A dropkick puts the big man outside again and the Crossface makes Kanyon tap.

Rating: B-. The interference was a bit much but they let two talented guys have a good match for about ten minutes. It’s not the best match in the world or anything but after the hour and a half that I had to sit through put this just a step below Steamboat vs. Flair. Kanyon hasn’t been busting out much new stuff lately but he’s still different enough to stand out in the sea of brawlers in WCW.

Page comes out and the Triad lays out Benoit and Saturn to make sure they don’t lose any heat.

Here’s Megadeth’s performance from Monday to waste about five minutes.

Curt Hennig vs. Konnan

Konnan has to chase Bobby off the apron to start before kicking Curt in the ribs to break up a test of strength. A bulldog and dropkick put Hennig down as well, meaning we at least get some great selling. The less famous Windham interferes to give Curt control with all of his usual. Konnan comes back with the rolling clothesline and X Factor, only to have Hennig throw him outside. A huge brawl breaks out on the floor as Konnan hooks the Tequila Sunrise, only to have Barry come in with the cowbell to give Hennig a cheap win.

Overall Rating: D-. Well let’s see. Eddie loses to Lenny Lane, one match broke five minutes, the show long story was Jimmy Hart adding people to the junkyard match, despite no affiliation with the guy running it, multiple matches for Sunday were either added or changed, and about a fourth of the show was spent on videos from Nitro. Someone remind me why this show exists.

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Monday Nitro #195
Date: July 5, 1999
Location: Georgia Dome, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 25,338
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re back in WCW’s home town now for the go home show for Bash at the Beach. At the moment there are only a few matches announced for Sunday but that’s better than we’ve been getting lately. The main story continues to be Nash stealing Gorgeous George and Savage being a psycho. Well that and the youth movement being crushed like a bug. Let’s get to it.

Opening recap of last week’s events and Savage accidentally taking Torrie back instead of George on Thunder.

The announcers do their welcome.

Juventud Guerrera vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

There’s a raised logo, presumably for Megadeth later or some stupid WCW thing, on the ramp and Chavo falls down on his way to the ring. Nice job WCW. Juvy mocks Chavo’s history with Pepe to start and gets the fans fired up. A shoulder drops Chavo and Juvy gives us a pelvic thrust. Juvy hammers away in the corner but gets dropped throat first across the ropes. Chavo follows up but takes a Stunner to put him across the ropes as well.

An early Juvy Driver attempt sends Chavo bailing as the announcers hype up Megadeth and Bret’s appearance for the third time already. On the floor now with Chavo taking over off a dropkick. Back in and we get the Gory Stretch into a Gory Bomb but Chavo drops an elbow instead of covering.

Guerrero goes up for the “I’m going to jump straight down so I can land on your raised boots” spot before they go into a pinfall reversal sequence, capped off by Juvy scoring a German suplex for two. A slam looks to set up the 450 but Chavo pops up to crotch him. Something like a sitout brainbuster plants Juvy but Sid and Savage come in for the DQ.

Rating: C. The match was fun while it lasted but Sid and Savage are almost a guarantee to bust up matches like this on Nitro anymore. Chavo is still one of the best cruiserweights without being over the top with his high flying. Juvy is starting to be insane and it works well for him when he gets it right.

Sid, wearing the World Title belt, powerbombs Juvy to set up the big elbow. The big man grabs the mic and says they want George back and won’t be held responsible for their actions. Nash and Torrie (looking as good as she ever has in WCW, which covers a lot of ground) pop up on screen. Kevin wants his belt back and thinks he should just beat up Sid tonight, but he’s been worn out this week. They banter a bit until George comes in wearing a Nash shirt, asking if she just heard Randy.

DJ Ran.

Gene brings out Ric Flair who comes out with his son. The boss takes the mic and says that since Scott Steiner has been running around the world, it’s time we have a new US Champion. That new champion will be….David Flair, due to him beating Nash by countout last week. Little Naitch comes out with a bunch of women who are all over the new champ. This brings out Buff Bagwell as balloons fall from the ceiling. Short version: Bagwell vs. Flair for the title tonight.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Vampiro

Rick yells about beating Van Hammer this coming Sunday. The champ hammers on Vampiro like the mindless brawler he is before hitting a hard German suplex. Vampiro’s kicks go nowhere as he gets dropped with a Steiner Line. The Steiner Bulldog sets up that weird arm hold Rick has been using to end this quick.

Lenny and Lodi come through some doors with Lodi giving Lenny new tights. Lenny isn’t sure that they’ll fit but Lodi says he knows ever inch of him. The doors close to reveal the word “closet”. GET IT?

Video on Bret Hart leaving due to Owen passing away. The last shot is of an empty ring.

Here’s Bret for his first public comments in months. He’s been told he has all the time he wants so he’s going to try not to rush. Bret thanks the wrestling fans on behalf of the entire Hart Family for all the well wishes they received. WCW has given him a chance to collect himself and he appreciates that. Owen wasn’t your average wrestler and he was a great human being. Bret doesn’t think there’s anyone that can say a bad thing about him. They were the closest of all his brothers and never had a single argument.

Eric Bischoff has asked him what he wants to do but Bret isn’t sure where he wants to go with his life. The Hart Family has lived and died for wrestling and there really isn’t much left for him to accomplish. All these great athletes are retiring in 1999 and they all seem so happy. He’s afraid that his career will end in a tragedy but he just doesn’t know. Bret thanks all of his fans everywhere and all of the wrestlers he’s worked with over the years. He hopes he wasn’t too stiff and that’s about it.

Eddie Guerrero comes up to Doug Dillinger and shouts in Spanish. After switching to English, he says someone has stolen his wallet. It was a masked wrestler and Eddie wants them all lined up so he can pick out the culprit. I don’t see this ending well.

DJ Ran.

The Cat vs. Jerry Flynn

This is a kickboxing match because WCW is a stupid promotion. We have a round system with Round 1 consisting of a lot of circling and some light kicks. The fans boo this out of the building as the round ends with nothing to talk about. Round 2 starts with Cat going down to the mat and receiving a warning. Flynn tries a big kick and falls flat on his back because this is a joke. Back up and Cat hits some kicks to the ribs to knock Jerry down before a big shot to the head results in a DQ for hitting a downed opponent. Seriously, that’s the whole thing.

Flynn tackles Cat and they brawl some more. This was one of the dumbest things I’ve ever had to sit through.

Lodi vs. Van Hammer

Hammer jumps him from the start and knocks Lodi all over the place. Some jumping clotheslines and a big boot send Lodi out to the floor, where he steals Heenan’s water. Lodi is sent into the barricade but Lenny low bridges Hammer down to change things up a bit. Back in and Lodi actually busts out a hurricanrana, only to try again and get dropped onto the top rop. A superplex brings Lenny in and the cobra clutch slam ends Lodi. Total squash for the sake of unfunny comedy.

Dillinger tries to get all of the luchadors together for a show up but there are some communication barriers. Cops come in and clear things up as this is going to continue.

Gene brings out Roddy Piper because this show hasn’t gone low enough yet. Roddy agrees that rap is crap but wants to talk to Sting. Here’s a clearly fake Sting who is about an inch taller than Okerlund. Piper asks him about working with Savage but Fake Sting shakes his head no. Now Piper wants to see his real face but gets another no, earning Fake Sting a neckbreaker. Piper takes the mask off and we barely see the guy’s face.

Moving on to Sunday, Piper wants a boxing match against Buff Bagwell. Why a boxing match you ask? Well we really don’t get a reason for that but we’ve had bad kickboxing so why not bad regular boxing? If that’s not enough, JJ Dillon brings in Judge Mills Lane (a former TV judge and big time boxing referee) to referee Sunday’s fight “In California in Florida!” Lane’s words, not mine. I know this sounds stupid, but it’s not like Piper has wrestled a match in years anyway so why not just let him do nothing but punch?

Nitro Girls.

DJ Ran.

Rey Mysterio Jr./Konnan vs. Steven Regal/Fit Finlay

You know, for all the bad things that WCW did in 1999, they actually built up a nice tag division. Mysterio clarifies that HOOTY HOO is the call of the soldier. Apparently Regal and Finlay don’t approve of the soldiers and want to beat some peace into the rappers. Regal powerbombs Rey and catapults him into a clothesline from Finlay. There’s the rolling fireman’s carry as Rey is in early trouble.

The Europeans crank on a Mysterio leg each but the referee makes them break it up. Mysterio finally avoids a charge in the corner and makes the hot tag to Konnan to clean some house. Everything breaks down as Konnan does the usual, including throwing Rey into a Bronco Buster on Regal. Not that it matters as the West Texas Rednecks come in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Finlay and Regal continue to work very well as foreign villains and they just look like they enjoy hurting people. The match was a way to have the Rednecks jump the soldiers and set up a match on Sunday. Who will be in that match hasn’t been announced yet but there are some combinations that could make for an interesting match.

US Title: David Flair vs. Buff Bagwell

David is defending in an angle that actually kind of works. Yeah he’s in over his head, but WCW acknowledging that he’s in over his head makes this a lot easier to sit through. Back when Erik Watts was thrown in over his head, they had to pretend he was good and it made things feel so stupid. At least here it’s making Ric look evil and corrupt and being played as an angle instead of reality.

Bagwell hammers away to start as you would expect, including planting David with a suplex. The champ finally hits a quick low blow to take over, only to run into an elbow and take the Blockbuster. Buff covers but Charles Robinson’s arm gives out. There’s a Figure Four on David but Ric and Arn come in. Buff beats them up too and puts the hold back on while small packaging Ric at the same time. Dean Malenko and Asya come in as well as this whole thing is a mess. Roddy runs out and nails Buff with something to give David the pin. Total mess but you had to expect that.

Time for Eddie to interrogate the luchadors. We have La Parka, Ciclope, Psychosis, Villano IV, a guy I don’t recognize, and Blitzkrieg. Everyone has to take their mask off but La Parka and Ciclope’s faces scare Eddie. He thinks Psychosis is a good looking guy. The guy I didn’t recognize is Cheetah Kid and apparently is Prince Iaukea under the mask. Blitzkrieg isn’t Hispanic and no one is happy with him. I’m assuming we’ll get more on this later.

The TV feed messes up and we have Hak and Chastity on a ladder. Hak was born in 1963 and started choking his doctor. He’s had to fight all his life and it’s all he knows how to do. Now he’s in WCW to get paid to fight. Hak lists off all the men he’s hurt and thinks there should be a junkyard hardcore invitational on Sunday because we can’t have hardcore matches in the arena anymore.

The rednecks come out and asks how many people here are good old boys, rednecks and people that just hate rap. They plays the song and that’s it.

Video on Savage and company.

Jersey Triad vs. Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko/Perry Saturn

Benoit runs Kanyon over with a shoulder and snaps off the Rolling Germans before we go to an early break. Back with Saturn getting triple teamed but ducking a charging Page, sending Kanyon into his partner with a clothesline. Off to Benoit who cleans house with clotheslines and a dropkick for Bigelow. He heads up but Page crotches him down and stomps away in the corner before tagging out to Kanyon. A slingshot elbow gets two on Benoit and it’s back to Bigelow for a bearhug.

Benoit actually climbs up Bigelow into a sunset flip and avoids the big sitdown splash. A double tag brings in Saturn and Kanyon with Perry cleaning house as everything breaks down. Malenko tombstones Kanyon and avoids Bigelow’s top rope headbutt, setting up a top rope Saturn splash to Bigelow, followed by the Swan Dive for the pin.

Rating: C+. It didn’t have a ton of time but you knew these guys were going to have a good match if they were given more than eight seconds. They had to give the small guys a win to set up their Tag Team Title match on Sunday, even though I don’t think Malenko has anything for the pay per view.

And now, Megadeth performs Crush Em live. After five minutes of barely understandable lyrics, the band is booed out of the arena. The lights go out and Goldberg’s voice says I’M BACK! We see his silhouette and go to a commercial. I’ll give Megadeth’s performance this though: at least their drummer was making contact, unlike Barry Windham earlier.

WCW World Title: Sid vs. Kevin Nash

Nash is defending of course but Sid has the belt itself. Before the bell, Nash tells Savage to get rid of the girls if he ever wants to see Gorgeous George again. So it’s Nash vs. Sid for that In Your House main event the world was waiting for. They head into the corner for some elbows to the challenger’s jaw followed by a running clothesline. Sid bails to the floor but Savage runs in after about a minute. The referee doesn’t ring a bell though, leaving Nash to fight off both guys. Sid decks the referee to officially throw the thing out.

Nash fights them off until Fake Sting comes out to beat him down. Cue the real Sting for the real save but Nash powerbombs him, thinking it’s the Sting that attacked him. The champ goes up the aisle and says what’s left of George is in his dressing room. Savage runs to the back and finds Torrie with George.

He gets in George’s face, demanding to know if he touched her. Savage turns to Torrie and smacks her in the face. A screaming Torrie points out that George is wearing a Nash shirt so Savage rips it off her and throws her into a hallway (George: “WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS???”) as the camera cuts off REALLY fast to end the show. I know I say a lot of stuff on these shows are horrible, but this was bordering on hard to sit through.

Overall Rating: D. Leaving out the disturbing ending, this was a horrible show. We’ve reached the point where WCW has gone from boring to stupid with stuff like Mills Lane refereeing a boxing match between Bagwell and Piper, two different music performances, Lenny and Lodi beating their story into your head and what felt like a comedy sketch about kickboxing. They’re on the verge of running scared at this point, but somehow this is easier to sit through than the shows from a month and a half ago.

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Today we’re going to take a look at one of the more underrated luchadors in Psychosis.

Psychosis (often spelled Psicosis) started in 1989 in a local promotion in Mexico. We’ll pick things up in 1993 at the When Worlds Collide show, co-promoted by WCW and AAA.

Madonna‘s Boyfriend/Fuerza Guerrera/Psicosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr./Heavy Metal/Latin Lover

Madonna‘s Boyfriend is Louis Spicolli. You know Psicosis and Rey. Latin Lover is a guy that was in WWF for like one match and was a big deal in AAA for awhile. You have to pin either the captain (Guerrera and Metal respectively) or both of their partners. So it‘s kind of like an elimination match, but if you pin the right guy you win automatically. It‘s kind of weird but again it‘s a cultural thing.

Big brawl to start and now it‘s time for the explanation of technicos and rudos. HUGE pop for the 19 year old Rey. Fuerza vs. Metal to start us off in a captains match. Off to Psicosis and Rey who are called potential superstars by Cruise. Well he‘s half right. Rey sends Psicosis to the floor via a slick rana but Psicosis shows some common sense and RUNS from the ring as Rey sets for a dive.

Off to Spicolli who is way bigger than almost anyone else in this. Louis puts him on the top and pats the head. Then he does it again so Rey snaps off a missile dropkick which is no sold. Off to Latin Lover who used to be a male stripper according to Tenay. Cruise: “How did you find that out?” Spicolli likes to dance a lot.

Heavy Metal clears the ring and we‘re told he‘s the son of the referee. Things speed way up and Metal puts on a nice acrobatics display with Psicosis. Off to Guerrerra vs. Rey. The fans are into this a lot more when Rey is there. There‘s another rana, this time off the apron to the floor. Psicosis tries to ram into Latin Lover and it fails a lot. Off to Metal vs. Guerrera and we get a low blow by Guerrera I think.

Off to Spicolli and the tagging thing is still hard to get used to. Rey gets tossed into the crowd as the heels take over. The most famous guys are in again and they hit the air quickly. Back to Lover vs. Spicolli and make that vs. Guerrera instead. Lover is very popular here and his superkicks get good reactions. Love misses a top rope splash and Guerrera hooks a very modified Sharpshooter.

That lasts all of five seconds and they slug it out a bit. Metal does a sweet backflip off the top and things break down again. This match needs to end now. Rey speeds things way up and hits a SCARY swanton headbutt (only way to describe it) to the floor onto Spicolli. Guerrera hooks a neck hold on Metal after he missed a swanton for the tap out. And yes he actually tapped.

Rating: C. Meltzer overrating stuff that isn‘t American? Say it isn‘t so! Yeah this got four stars from him and it‘s just not that good. It‘s too long and while it was cool to see Rey with intact knees, there wasn‘t much here for the most part. It was sloppy at times and the constant brawls were a bit much to take.

Paul Heyman brought some luchadors into ECW, including Psychosis and Mysterio for November to Remember 1995.

Psicosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

This is a Mexican Death Match, meaning more or less last man standing but you need a pin before the count begins. This was a long running feud and I think this is the blowoff match. The fans chant Rudo at Psicosis. Rey of course gets a Tecnico chant and comes out to what sounds like Sad But True by Metallica. Yep that’s what it is. Not what I think of when I think of Rey. The big match intros are done in both languages.

This is when Rey was still like the fastest guys in the world and Psicosis is able to keep up with him so I’m not even going to try to call play by play on this. Even Joey can barely do it and he could double as an auctioneer. Rey gets a quick pin off a top rope rana but Psicosis is just mad and not really hurt. Out to the floor we go and Rey falls when trying to jump onto the railing. That clip is on the Rise and Fall of ECW I believe.

Back in the ring a missile dropkick puts Rey down and a moonsault gets a pin. The count is unimportant at this point because we’re only like three minutes into this. Rey gets draped across the buckle as this is one sided at the moment. How weird is it to see Psicosis as the far bigger and stronger guy? Powerbomb gets the pin but Rey is up 1. They’re counting backwards so he barely beat the count.

Psicosis goes to get a chair but changes his mind and is booed out of the building. A buckle bomb keeps Rey down. Twisting senton (flip into a backsplash) gets another pin but that’s fine because Rey is up at 1 again. Dropkick puts him right back down and the fans are literally standing. Now it’s chair time and Rey takes a DDT onto it. He beats on Rey then puts the chair on Rey’s back for a moonsault to get his fourth pin in a row.

Rey barely beats the count so Psicosis goes for the possibly injured knee (from the botch earlier) which is rather smart strategy. Psicosis tries a moonsault but Rey pulls the chair into the way and takes over. Springboard clothesline sends Psicosis to the floor. High cross body and we’re in the crowd for a second. HUGE moonsault (Asai hadn’t been named yet I don’t think) and Rey takes over with some chair shots.

Psicosis tries to run into the crowd and you can’t see them but Rey brings them back and they’re at ringside again. Never mind as we’re going back into the fans. Psicosis is more or less running as Rey is on fire. They’re right below Joey (who is in what’s called The Eagle’s Nest) so Rey hits him with a chair, climbs up the Eagle’s Nest and dives off with a HUGE hurricanrana and Psicosis is dead and we’re done.

Rating: B. Pretty awesome stuff here as Rey played possum after the beating and then woke up to massacre Psicosis and become just too much for him. Rey was only 20 at this point so he was a total rookie phenom. Total war here and the psychology actually existed. Rey would be in WCW in about 7 months.

Here’s one of Psychosis’ first matches in WCW at Clash of the Champions XXXII.

Mexican Heavyweight Title: Konnan vs. Psychosis

Mike Tenay jumps in on commentary. Konnan is defending and the title is an invented prop to give him a foot in the door. He’s a huge star in Mexico and Psychosis is a big deal in his own right. Psychosis wrestles in a mask with horns on the side as a high flier while Konnan is more of a power brawler despite not being very big. Konnan quickly sends Psychosis to the floor before sidestepping a charge, only to have Psychosis land on his feet.

A neck hold is quickly broken by Psychosis but Konnan nails him with a German suplex to stagger Psychosis. Konnan hooks a leg lock but Psychosis makes the ropes. Psychosis nails a spinwheel kick and grabs an arm hold, only to get reversed into a half crab. The hold doesn’t last long but Konnan dropkicks the knee and drops Psychosis with a DDT. Psychosis comes back by sending Konnan outside, setting up a nice dive over the top. Back in and Konnan hits a German superplex while hanging onto the top rope. Konnan puts on a standing figure four while having Psychosis’ arms tied in as well (called the Zip Lock) for the win.

Rating: C+. The idea here was to showcase lucha libre on national television and it worked quite well. The Zip Lock is awesome in theory but it doesn’t have the impact that it needed to be a big time hold. Psychosis got to do some nice dives and the match was a success. This division would get much better with some more names being added in the near future.

Mysterio was brought in over the summer of 1996 and fought Psychosis in his second PPV match at Bash at the Beach 1996.

Rey Mysterio vs. Psychosis

Rey had debuted at the PPV the month before this. This should be awesome as they have all kinds of history together. Tenay replaces Bobby for this one. Rey is YOUNG here, only being 21 at this point. Rey starts off with a half crab. We hear about how popular these two are, talking about how the masks are sold in the streets. I always wanted a Kane mask. Finally they get tired of the leg locks and go all lucha on us.

And then they hit a chinlock. Sure why not. Psychosis hits the guillotine legdrop that would be his finisher later but it’s just two here. You know for a match with these guys, this is pretty boring. Rey finally starts throwing some ranas to make things interesting. West Coast Pop gets two. And let’s talk about the main event. Heenan is here too actually.

We hit the floor and Psychosis hits a perfect senton to the floor on Mysterio. It’s a back splash, not the Hardy move. This referee is really annoying. He has a hitch in his count just like that Armstrong referee that got released a few months ago. So after almost ten minutes they realize they’re Rey Mysterio and Psychosis and just go off with high spots.

Psychosis goes for Splash Mountain (Razor’s Edge into a sitout powerbomb from the top) but Rey shoves off in mid air and hooks him into a hurricanrana for the pin. That’s still one of my all time favorite endings to a match. Mysterio would win the Cruiserweight Title the next night on Nitro.

Rating: B+. This started VERY slow but once they realized the crowd was only halfway into it, they cranked it WAY up and it turned into nothing but awesome high spots. See, this is a FAR different Rey than you’re used to today. This is when he was the best cruiserweight ever. He was pulling off stuff that is just flat out insane.

Here’s a PPV title shot at World War 3 1996.

Cruiserweight Title: Psicosis vs. Dean Malenko

Malenko was just about perfect at this point and would somehow get better the next year, actually winning best technical wrestler both in 96 and 97 from Meltzer as well as winning the PWI 500 which is fan voted I believe. They were building to Malenko vs. Dragon next month in what would more or less be a throwaway match. We start with a lot of technical stuff as you would expect us to.

Bobby picks Malenko to win the battle royal tonight. I’ll set the over under on him changing at 8.5. They’re doing the three broadcast teams tonight. That’s just going to make my head hurt. Malenko has a leglock on and the fans look at something in the audience. After more decent stuff, Psicosis falls off the top rope and slams his head into the railing. Since he isn’t dead, we can continue.

Dean goes into his finishing sequence but the ropes break the Cloverleaf. He destroys the knee and is completely dominating here. We ignore the over the top thing again and Psicosis hits a top rope flip from the top and hits his head again. Good thing he wears that mask or he’d need to get one to cover up the ugly. Then again I’ve seen him sans mask so maybe he needed it all along.

Dean takes a rana from the top for two as this is kind of pedestrian and the crowd isn’t into it at all really. He gets a SWEET reversal out of a suplex into a small package. That looked great. A tombostone gets two for the champion and then he rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: B-. Decent match but they just felt a bit bored out there. They were kind of off by a step or so and it showed badly. It’s definitely good but there was something holding it back from being really good. The crowd didn’t care at all for some reason which is odd as Malenko was usually very popular. Weird but good.

We’ll jump ahead to Nitro on March 31, 1997.

Psychosis vs. Villano IV

Time for the random Cruiserweight match of the week. They trade wristlocks to start and Psychosis is put on the mat. He tries to spin out of it but Villano grabs a headlock to counter. I love basic stuff like that. Tenay shows off his knowledge of wrestling, explaining where the name Villano comes from (it means Villain and comes from Villano I being the villain in an El Santo movie). Psychosis headscissors him down and hits a spinwheel kick to a crotched Villano.

A big corkscrew plancha to the floor takes Villano down again. Back inside and Psychosis tries a jumping DDT off the top but gets caught in something like a side slam for two. We cut to the back where the NWO is talking. They say they’re going to take care of business. Wallstreet walks out on them and now it’s back to our match. Villano misses a moonsault and a superkick sets up the guillotine legdrop for the pin. We didn’t see enough to rate but what we saw was solid.

Back to PPV on Bash at the Beach 1997.

Juventud Guerrera/Hector Garza/Lizmark Jr. vs. La Parka/Psicosis/Villano IV

Ready for some pointless lucha libre for the sake of only having lucha libre? Onoo is with Parka and Psicosis. This is under lucha libre rules, meaning if you go to the floor someone else on your team can come in sans tag. Lizmark and Psicosis start us off as Tenay tries to explain rudos vs. technicos. Juventud’s team is technico here. They do some speed stuff and then Villano and Garza come in because they feel like it.

Things speed up and after this point I’m really not going to try to keep track of what’s going on because the point of it is to go completely insane for awhile. Sonny tries to kick Juvy but he moves and the kick hits La Parka instead. The power of money keeps him from mauling Onoo. Psicosis misses a running dropkick and the rudo team has an argument.

Juvy hits a springboard triple splash for two and all three technicos hit stereo planchas as the referee literally ducks and covers in the corner. Juvy tries a springboard cross body but Psicosis gets something like a dropkick up to block it. They go to the corner and Psicosis gets something like a sunset bomb on steroids for two. They do some more insane stuff and Garza gets a moonsault press for two.

Everything breaks down again as some heels collide. We get the four man move called the Star that never got over in America. Basically they’re all on the mat and have leg locks on someone while two guys get in the middle and do a move. It’s WAY too contrived to look good at all. Five man Tower of Doom is broken up and everyone goes to the floor.

Lizmark is the last one out with a big dive to Villano. Air Juvy (love that move) and again I can’t keep up with this at all. Garza hits his HUGE corkscrew plancha to take out everyone else. Villiano V comes out and switches with his brother but gets caught by a missile dropkick and standing moonsault for the pin by Garza.

Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade because from an American standpoint, it was an insane mess but from a lucha libre standpoint, I’d think it was rather good. It certainly was exciting and got the crowd going again, but at the same time this kind of stuff happened about once a PPV for WCW. This was one of the more fun ones though.

The idea worked so well that they did it again at Clash XXXV.

Villano IV/Villano V/Silver King/Psychosis vs. Juventud Guerrera/Lizmark Jr./Super Calo/Hector Garza

This is another of the lucha rules tag matches. The Villanos are brothers who can only be told apart by the number on their tights. Silver King is a short guy without much of note to him. Juventud is a young guy and one of the best fliers in the company. Lizmark is a generic masked man who didn’t accomplish much in WCW. Hector Garza is the focal point of the match for a corkscrew plancha he’s been using lately. Sonny Onoo manages Psychosis’ team.

Psychosis and Calo start with some fast armdrags and clotheslines without doing much of note. The near silence from the crowd implies they know what’s coming so they’re not wasting their energy on the basic stuff to start. Off to Lizmark vs. Villano IV who hit the mat for some near falls until Hector and Lizmark send Silver King and Villano IV to the floor as the crowd suddenly wakes up.

Calo dives first with a nice flip dive followed by Lizmark taking them all out with a suicide dive. Guerrera goes next by landing Air Juvy (a sideways dive over the top with his leg taking out everyone already on the floor). Villano V dives through the ropes to takes everyone out again and it’s Garza finishing everything off with the corkscrew plancha. Back inside Calo loads up a hurricanrana on Psychosis but Sonny saves his client. Psychosis drops his guillotine legdrop on Calo for the pin.

Rating: C. The fans had gotten the idea of the spot fest by now and the match suffered as a result. The big mess at the end was entertaining as you would expect it to be but there wasn’t anything else to the match. It was encouraging to see how the depth of the division as most of these guys were on a lower level but still entertaining and talented.

We’ll jump ahead to Nitro on January 5, 1998.

Psychosis vs. Juventud Guerrera

The winner gets the first shot at Dragon. Apparently we’re going to see Bischoff vs. Zbyszko in its entirety on Thunder. Good to know I paid to see it live because I can now see it again less than two weeks later. Psychosis takes him down twice in a row to start but misses a splash in the corner to let Juvy fire off some chops. Juvy sends him to the floor and there’s a big dive to take Psychosis out.

Back in and Psychosis crotches him on the top rope as Tony starts bragging about the NWO not holding any titles. A facejam gets two for Psychosis but the guillotine legdrop misses. Juvy hits a springboard missile dropkick to take out Psychosis’ knee before pounding away at the masked head. Juvy goes up but dives into a dropkick to the ribs to shift momentum again. Psychosis has a powerbomb reversed into a DDT and the 450 sends Juvy to Thunder (where else?) for the title shot.

Rating: C. This was fine. Both guys got to do their thing and it was a nice change of pace from the match we saw just before it. As stupid as some of the main event stuff would get, the lower card stuff on Nitro was almost always an excellent mix of different styles, which is what we got right here.

Here’s a bonus PPV match at Spring Stampede 1998.

La Parka vs. Psychosis

This is a bonus match. La Parka dances a lot before chopping Psychosis down. Psychosis comes back with chops of his own before sending La Parka into the buckle. La Parka stands him on the top turnbuckle but Psychosis jumps backwards into a headscissors takeover to send skeleton man to the floor. A suicide dive takes La Parka down but he gets back inside first anyway. Back in and a clothesline gets two on Psychosis before he’s sent to the floor for a springboard split legged moonsault. Heenan: “Another move I never thought of trying.”

Psychosis might have a bad shoulder but he launches La Parka face first into the buckle. Not that it matters as La Parka kicks him in the head to put Psychosis on the floor again. Back in and Psychosis tries a springboard hurricanrana but can’t get up to the top for a few moments. I guess the fans booing is better than their dead silence. Psychosis misses a top rope splash and gets caught in an Alabama Slam for two. La Parka poses on the ropes but gets dropkicked down, tying his legs up in the ropes. The guillotine legdrop from Psychosis finally ends this torture.

Rating: D. It’s not easy to complain about free wrestling but man alive this was dull stuff. There was no story to the match other than a forgotten chair shot from a few weeks back. The match being very sloppy didn’t help things either and the fans clearly weren’t pleased. Was Juvy not available for this? He was always good at firing up a crowd which would have helped things out a lot here.

Another bonus match at Road Wild 1998.

Psychosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Bonus match and the winner gets a Cruiserweight Title shot at a date to be determined. Since that’s not important, the announcers talk about Leno being nervous. Psychosis takes him to the mat with a headlock followed by an armbar. Rey tries to get up but gets taken back down by the wrist. The crowd is dead for this which shouldn’t shock anyone. Back up again and Rey can’t hook a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker so Psychosis clotheslines him down for two.

A sitout front suplex gets two for Psychosis and he whips Rey from corner to corner. Rey’s arms are wrapped around the ropes in the corner as this somehow gets even slower. It’s not terrible mind you but it’s the completely wrong style for these two to be working. Psychosis suplexes Rey down and goes up top, only to do the most obvious “I’m going up here to jump into his raised boots because I’m jumping straight down instead of doing ANY kind of move at all” spot I can remember in a long time.

Rey FINALLY realizes that he’s the king of cruiserweights and cartwheels at Psychosis before jumping onto his shoulders for a spinning hurricanrana. Believe it or not, the crowd actually responds to the high spot. After nothing of note on the floor, Rey hits a big cross body for two but has his hurricanrana countered into a sitout powerbomb. That’s enough of the big spots though and it’s nerve hold time. Rey fights up onto Psychosis’ shoulders but gets dropped back into a suplex for two.

They head outside again where Psychosis….does nothing. Back inside with Psychosis putting on a half crab before going up top for a super Frankensteiner for two. Psychosis goes up again but turns his back to Rey, only to get dropkicked out to the floor. Rey follows him out with a nice dive before throwing him back inside for a springboard sunset flip for a close two.

Mysterio hits something like a Fameasser with both legs across Psychosis’ back followed by a slingshot moonsault for two. Psychosis comes back with something resembling a Fameasser of his own for two but Rey avoids a charge and West Coast Pops his way to the #1 contendership.

Rating: D+. This felt like a car that was low on gas. You could get it going for a few moments, but eventually it would sputter and die. These two are capable of having some awesome matches but instead they were happy with just laying around and doing nothing most of the time. Rey was trying but Psychosis looked horrible.

At Souled Out 1999, we have another match of thrown together cruiserweights with no particular rhyme or reason.

Cruiserweight Title: Psychosis vs. Billy Kidman vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Juventud Guerrera

TONY LIED TO US ABOUT THE STARTERS! How can I ever survive by having to last a full hour without knowing what’s going to happen? How do I know if I should stay tuned if I don’t know if this will be one of the biggest nights in the history of our sport??? This is one fall to a finish, Kidman is defending and will be starting with Juvy. Psychosis is a substitute for Eddie Guerrero after Eddie had a horrible car wreck at the beginning of the year. Tony apologizes for giving us wrong information then says it doesn’t matter anyway.

Kidman and Mysterio get things going but all four are in within fifteen seconds. Things settle down before they get more interesting and we get the starters alone in the ring. Rey shakes Kidman’s hand before taking him down with a headscissors but Kidman hooks one of his own. Both guys try cross bodies at the same time and everyone is down. Both other guys come in without tags before Kidman and Rey tag them in a few seconds later.

They trade cradles in a nice sequence but the fans still don’t seem to care. A sloppy looking sequence results in some standing switches as the silence here is very strange. The fans usually love these cruiserweight matches. Everything breaks down and the fans pick up a bit as Rey throws Kidman into the BK Bomb for no cover. Rey sidesteps Psychosis so Kidman can hit the top rope cross body for two. Juvy trips up Kidman (Psychosis: “THANK YOU JUVY!”) so Psychosis can hit a nice front suplex to put the champion down.

A running clothesline puts Kidman on the floor with Juvy throwing Rey onto the champion. Psychosis and Juvy get in an argument over who is going to do an Asai Moonsault so Rey and Kidman powerbomb them off the apron to the floor. Back in and a springboard Doomsday Device with Rey playing Hawk gets two on Guerrera. Rey and Psychosis fight on the apron with Mysterio monkey flipping Psychosis over the post and onto the floor in a nice spot.

Kidman hits a nice cannonball off the top onto Psychosis but might have hurt his own shoulder. A great looking Air Juvy takes both guys down and Rey follows him out but only hits Kidman. Juvy clotheslines Psychosis by mistake so he heads back inside for a springboard seated senton from Mysterio. A Juvy Driver gets two on Rey with Psychosis making the save with a springboard missile dropkick. Psychosis hooks a mostly botched middle rope victory roll for two on Guerrera before Kidman counters a powerbomb for two.

Mysterio spins into a bulldog on the champion for another near fall and everyone is sent outside save for Psychosis. Juvy lays the two good guys on the floor next to each other and Psychosis hits a BIG suicide dive to land on both of them. A second attempt hits floor instead of Mysterio but Kidman counters the Juvy driver into a reverse DDT. Rey sees that Kidman is loading up the Shooting Star but hits a springboard hurricanrana on Psychosis anyway. The Shooting Star is good for the pin on Guerrera to retain the title.

Rating: B-. Good but not great match here with some awesome high spots. Unfortunately there wasn’t much besides though and it really brought the match down a few notches. Guerrero would have been better in there but thankfully the division was deep enough that you could just throw in another name like Psychosis to fill in the spot. This would have been better if they cut out about three minutes to tighten things up a little bit.

Another fourway from Nitro on April 19, 1999.

Cruiserweight Title: Psychosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Kidman vs. Blitzkrieg

Mysterio is defending and this is one fall to a finish. The fans really odn’t seem to like Psychosis or Blitzkrieg. We cut to the front row and see a man all in black with a mohawk hair cut and jewelery on his fingers that look like claws. Tony recognizes him as Alex Wright, which is very impressive detective work on his part as Wright looks completely different and is wearing big sunglasses.

It’s a big brawl to start with only Juvy and Psychosis left standing. Blitzkrieg avoids a charge to send Psychosis hard into the post. Juvy loads up a powerbomb on Psychosis for a springboard seated senton from Rey. Guerrera backdrops Mysterio out to the floor and holds up Blitzkrieg for a missile dropkick from Psychosis. Blitzkrieg escapes another powerbomb attempt and causes Juvy to accidentally hit a top rope Fameasser on Psychosis.

Rey is back in with a split legged moonsault to Juvy but Psychosis takes over and throw Guerrera into the air for a big crash. Blitzkrieg and Rey knock the other two to the floor before hitting a pair of Asai moonsaults. Back in and Blitzkrieg hits some standing flips onto Rey for two as Juvy and Psychosis are trying to get back in. Guerrera is back up first with a springboard missile dropkick to Blitzkrieg’s back, leaving him alone with Rey.

A quick hurricanrana puts Guerrera down and a slingshot splash gets two. Psychosis and Rey take turns breaking up pins by hitting each other in the face. Things settle down with Juvy bulldogging Rey for two before calling for the Juvy Driver. Instead it’s a kind of reverse DDT but Psychosis comes in with a top rope splash for two on the champion. Mysterio’s top rope bulldog puts Psychosis down and we have to take a break.

Back with Juvy hitting a huge dive onto Blitzkrieg and Psychosis. Rey goes outside as well but Psychosis pops up and dives onto all three of them. Back in and Rey powerbombs Juvy for two but Psychosis makes a save. Blitzkrieg busts out a very quick Figure Four to Psychosis, only to have Juvy make the save and drop a guillotine legdrop on Psychosis for two. Juvy powerbombs Blitzkrieg but Rey gets the cover for two. Mysterio hurricanranas Juvy off the top and Psychosis steals two of his own.

Blitzkrieg can’t get a jawbreaker on Juvy so Rey dropkicks Guerrera to the floor instead. Rey makes the mistake of posing instead of covering, allowing Juvy to try a powerbomb out of the corner. That’s fine with Rey as he hurricanranas Guerrera again. Juvy pops back up and snaps Mysterio across the top for two more. Psychosis clotheslines Juvy to the floor but Blitzkrieg kicks him in the face.

A slam sets up the Phoenix Splash for two on Psychosis but this time it’s Juvy making the save and Juvy Drivering Blitzkrieg for two. Rey comes back in and hurricanranas Guerrera out to the floor. Psychosis breaks up a Blitzkrieg superplex attempt and drops the guillotine legdrop for the pin and the title in a shocker.

Rating: B+. WHAT A MATCH! I don’t ever remember a cruiserweight match going this long (over twenty one minutes) and there is something going on for the entirety of the time. Usually there’s the period where things cool down but they never reached that point here. Psychosis winning is a big surprise and the match was very entertaining. Great stuff.

Psychosis would face Eddie Guerrero in one of Eddie’s first matches back from his car wreck in late 1998. From Thunder on June 24, 1999.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Psychosis

The fans are entirely behind Eddie here. Eddie mocks taking the LWO shirt off to Psychosis before running into a clothesline. A hurricanrana out of the corner drops Eddie again and Psychosis crotches him on the top for good measure. Psychosis kicks Guerrero to the floor and follows him out with a big dive. The announcers are already ignoring this to talk about the Hummer driver.

Back in and Eddie hurricanranas Psychosis down and it’s already back to the floor. Psychosis goes into the steps and gets crushed between the steps and post for a dropkick. The slingshot hilo has Psychosis in even more trouble and Eddie hooks an abdominal stretch as we take a break. Back with Guerrero holding a leg lock but being thrown into the air for a big crash a few seconds later.

That’s fine with Eddie as he goes right back to the leg to take over. He bridges back on the leg in a painful looking hold before taking it back outside, only to be sent into the barricade. They head inside again with Eddie nailing a nice leg lariat. Eddie dives into an atomic drop and gets kicked off the apron and to the floor. A slingshot moonsault drops Guerrero again and it’s back into the ring. Eddie’s tornado DDT is countered and a top rope hurricanrana gets two. Psychosis misses a high cross body though and the Frog Splash is enough for the pin.

Rating: B. This is the kind of stuff that made WCW fans stick around as long as they did. Yeah there’s a bunch of nonsense going on and the old guys won’t just go away and let the younger generation take over, but every so often you get a ten to fifteen minute match like this that just takes off and entertains the heck out of you. Really good stuff here and more proof that Eddie was awesome.

Psychosis left WCW in mid 2000 and appeared at ECW Heat Wave 2000.

Psicosis vs. Little Guido vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Mikey, in a suit jacket, plants Psicosis to start and Tajiri kicks him to the floor. Whipwreck nails a quick Whippersnapper on Guido and throws him outside, setting up a huge dive. Tony Mamaluke (the other FBI member) comes in but gets dropped by Mikey. That’s the end of Mikey’s early success though as he dives on Big Sal, only to get rammed into the post. Back inside and Psicosis drops a guillotine legdrop on Mikey for the elimination less than two minutes in. Why in the world was he even added? If nothing else, it’s one more paycheck Heyman had to hand out.

Psicosis kicks Tajiri in the leg but gets armdragged down. A standing hurricanrana drops him as well as Guido is nowhere in sight. Tajiri gets his throat snapped across the top rope before Guido returns to fight Psicosis in the aisle. That’s fine with Tajiri who takes them both out with an Asai Moonsault. A hard kick to the head stuns Guido and a superplex plants him. Psicosis adds a moonsault legdrop for two before walking into the Kiss of Death (Tomikaze). Tajiri kicks Guido in the head and hits a German suplex on Psicosis for the elimination.

We’re down to Tajiri vs. Guido with the latter getting chopped in the corner. Tajiri tries to take him down in a powerbomb style pin but Guido keeps bridging up in a nice series of counters. The Tarantula has some more success for Tajiri and the fans are way behind him. The handspring elbow drops Guido again and it’s chair time.

Tajiri puts him in the Tree of Woe and baseball slides the chair into Guido’s face. Back up and Guido kicks the chair into Tajiri’s face and hits a bad looking middle rope Fameasser to send Tajiri outside. The fans inquire about their pizza before they slug it out in the corner. They chop it out until Tajiri blows the green mist in his eyes and hits a brainbuster for the pin.

Rating: D+. Well that happened. I’m not sure what else you want me to say about it. We’ve seen almost this same match about seven or eight times now and whoever wins is only going to be elevated for a little while before being dropped back down the card in favor of Sandman getting title matches despite giving wrestling a bad name every time he has one of his disasters. The match was decent enough but it’s not going to mean anything.

Like many other former WCW stars, Psychosis joined the WWA promotion and appeared at their Inception show.

International Cruiserweight Title/Seven Deadly Sins Tournament First Round: Psychosis vs. Juventud Guerrera

So not only is this for the company’s Cruiserweight Title, it’s also in the world title tournament and is a ladder match. Don’t overbook anything there guys. Also since this isn’t the first event for the company, Psychosis already won the title at a house show before this event, but the title was stripped so that the “first” champion could be crowned here. Psychosis won the first one in case you were wondering. Juvy gets on the mic before the match and does his Rock imitation which never was all that funny to me.

Something very different about this show is that the commentary comes through the PA system, meaning the fans can hear it. They head into the corner to start with Psychosis taking over. Juvy comes back with a spinwheel kick and a tornado DDT as things speed up. They head to the floor with Juvy shoving the ladder down so that the top of it slams into Psychosis’ head. FREAKING OW MAN!

Back inside and Psychosis dropkicks the ladder into Juvy’s face, only to get it sling shotted into his own face. Psychosis is busted open bad. Back inside and the fans aren’t all that thrilled with this. Juvy hits a loud chop in the corner and the ladder is laid across the top rope. Juvy tries a sunset flip which means nothing in this so it’s back to the ladder. Jerry suggests going for the belt. Gee thanks King. Juvy gets draped across the top rope and Psychosis hits a guillotine legdrop across the back of his head.

We get the first attempt at going up the ladder but Juvy hits a springboard missile dropkick to take the ladder out and send Psychosis into the top rope. Juvy gets another ladder for some reason but just like earlier, Psychosis dropkicks the ladder into Juvy to knock him down.

Back in and Juvy rams Psychosis into the ladder before climbing up and hitting some kind of a dive which doesn’t really keep going once he hits Psychosis. The ladder falls down and hits the referee but he’s fine because it wasn’t a planned bump. They both go up the ladder with Juvy hitting a sunset bomb to kill Psychosis. He adds a 450 for good measure and climbs up to win the title.

Rating: C+. This was a fun spot fest and that’s about all you need for it to be. I’m not a big fan of the idea of just throwing two guys out there and saying the winner of this is champion, but at least it was fun in the process. The high spots in this were pretty good too and for what it was, this was a solid opener.

Off to TNA for the first X-Division Title at their second weekly show.

X Title: AJ Styles vs. Jerry Lynn vs. Low Ki vs. Psicosis

Yes it’s just the X Title here as this isn’t an official division at this point. Ok so from what I can tell, two people start it off and when one is pinned, someone else comes in. When you lose twice, you’re eliminated. That’s a pretty cool concept actually. Styles and Psicosis start things off with AJ taking over quickly. A superkick gets two but Psicosis hits an elbow to the face to take over. Guillotine legdrop gets two on Styles but he pops back up and hits the Clash for the first pin on Psicosis.

Low Ki comes in immediately and fires off kicks, but AJ nips up from the mat and ranas him down. That was AWESOME. Low Ki reverses a German and kicks AJ’s head off to take over again. The Clash is broken up and AJ is launched into the post. Low Ki goes up top and Germans AJ down into a dragon sleeper (nowhere near as smooth as it could have been). AJ grabs the rope to escape so Low Ki kicks Styles in the head again. Low Ki misses a BIG flip dive and AJ clotheslines his head off. A German suplex into a belly to back facebuster gets the pin on Low Ki to get Jerry Lynn in to face Styles.

Lynn immediately clotheslines AJ down and hits the Cradle Piledriver to give him his first loss. This took less than ten seconds.

Psicosis comes in with a missile dropkick to the back of Lynn’s head to take him down fast. They fight over a go behind until Lynn snapmares him down, followed by a headscissors. Lynn gets a boot up in the corner and a middle rope bulldog gets two. Psicosis sends him to the floor and hits a somersalt plancha to take Lynn out. Back in and a spinwheel kick off the top gets a close two. Ricky Steamboat is going to take over as referee once we get down to two. Psicosis goes up again but jumps into a dropkick. Lynn hits the Cradle Piledriver to eliminate Psicosis.

Low Ki is back in next and it’s time to kick. To recap it’s Lynn with zero losses and Styles/Lynn with one each. Low Ki kicks Jerry down and hits a Muta Elbow for two. Lynn gets up a boot in the corner but Low Ki kicks him in the face and ranas him off the top. Jerry rolls through that into a sunset flip for two and it’s time for more kicks. Lynn says bring it on and hits an enziguri to take Low Ki down. They slug it out and Lynn backdrops him to take over. Jerry goes to the apron and avoids a shoulder to the ribs so he can hit a kind of Fameasser.

Cradle Piledriver is broken up and Low Ki grabs an arm hold. Lynn counters into a HARD powerbomb for two and loads up a brainbuster. Low Ki counters into a fisherman’s buster but Lynn counters THAT into a DDT for no cover. Cradle Piledriver hits out of nowhere and it’s down to Styles vs. Lynn. Styles has to get two falls to win the title while Lynn only has to get one.

Styles runs in and hits a quick kick but the Clash is countered into a rana. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Jerry and both guys are down. Lynn is sent to the apron but his sunset flip only gets one. AJ pops up top and hits a springboard moonsault for two. Jerry snaps off a tornado DDT for a two count and they’re both down again. Styles hits a DDT of his own for two but he charges into a running Liger Bomb out of the corner for two for Jerry. Cradle Piledriver is countered into the Clash and it’s one fall apiece, meaning Steamboat takes over and it’s next fall wins the title.

Both guys are down for a bit before they head to the corner. We get a pinfall reversal sequence which would make Flair and appropriately enough Steamboat jealous. There are about ten near falls in a minute and they clothesline each other to put both guys down again. They head to the floor and Lynn hits a WICKED Irish Whip into the barricade to send Styles flying.

AJ is like screw the pain and hits the moonsault into the reverse DDT on the floor to take over again. Back inside and Jerry breaks up a springboard to hit an Elevated DDT for a VERY close two. Lynn loads up the Cradle Piledriver but AJ counters into a rana. The rana is countered into a powerbomb but Lynn rotates him further than that, sending AJ’s face into the mat in a SWEET move.

Both guys are down again but it’s Lynn up first. Another Cradle Piledriver is countered into an FU into a backbreaker for two for Styles. Lynn counters a suplex into a brainbuster for two of his own. There’s a sleeper but AJ escapes and goes up top, only to get crotched and superplexed for two for Jerry. Lynn loads him up top again but AJ shoves him off and Spiral Tap gives him his first of many X Division Titles.

Rating: A. This was AWESOME and a total star making performance for AJ. Matches like this one were the ones that got the company on the map (eventually) and this was excellent even ten years later. Lynn vs. AJ was the first big feud as they would go at it for months, over that title and another one eventually. Great stuff here and an actual new idea for a match.

We’ll jump ahead to One Night Stand 2005.

Psicosis vs. Rey Mysterio

Still no traditional American wrestlers (yes I know Rey is from California but you get the idea). Psicosis doesn’t wear his mask after losing it in WCW, which is about as stupid of an idea as possible (Why let him keep the mask? I mean it’s not like he’s ridiculously popular and a ton of kids are going to buy them or anything so we’re in essence throwing away a gold mine or anything like that) but I digress.

Rey was still the high flier at this point and not a world champion or main event guy yet. The fans chant put the mask on which is amusing. The fans boo the heck out of a sleeper hold from Psicosis. One thing you have to give to the ECW fans: they were never a dead crowd. Ah now that’s more like it: top rope legdrop onto Rey who is on the railing.

Note to self: watch Bash at the Beach where these two lit the company on fire with an epic opening match that stole the whole show. It just happened to have the most shocking heel turn in history and no one else ever mentioned anything else on the show. Naturally they were never pushed but that’s WCW for you. All right NOW we’re getting somewhere as they just dive all over the place. The 619 gets booed out of the building but the West Coast Pop ends it just afterwards.

Rating: B-. This was a slow start but once they got going it worked much better. This was all over the place and it worked about as well as you could ask for it to. The problem with the wrestling here is starting to show: 7 minutes per match simply isn’t enough to really get anything going, but again that’s not the point here.

Psychosis got a job out of this and wound up teaming with Super Crazy in the Mexicools. Here they are at Armageddon 2005.

MNM vs. Mexicools

MNM is John Morrison (Nitro here) and Joey Mercury. The Mexicools are Super Crazy and Psicosis. See, they’re Mexicans and they ride lawnmowers. That’s their gimmick. Mercury vs. Psicosis to start us off. Off to Nitro who doesn’t do any better so it’s off to Mercury again. Ok make that Nitro. Yeah it’s Nitro. Not that I can’t tell them apart mind you. They’re just tagging in and out that much.

Psicosis misses a charge but gets a punch to Mercury’s stomach off the top. Spinwheel kick sends Mercury to the floor and here come the dives. Crazy uses the referee as a launching pad to dive onto MNM in a nice spot. Psicosis loads up the guillotine legdrop but Melina crotches him to shift momentum. Psicosis gets a sunset flip but a blind tag breaks up anything he’s about to get going.

Clothesline gets two for Mercury. Psicosis gets a nice headlock takeover/headscissors to take both guys down. No tag though as Mercury brings Nitro back in. Nitro takes Crazy out which is a smart move because when Psicosis breaks free for a tag attempt there’s no one to tag. Nitro grabs a Cravate and Psicosis still can’t make a tag. Mercury almost jumps into a boot in the stupidest spot ever but he catches himself which is a sigh of relief from me.

Psicosis gets an enziguri and it’s hot tag to Crazy. He sends MNM into each other and fires off some dropkicks for everyone. Tornado DDT gets two on Mercury. Nitro and Psicosis go to the floor and Crazy hits the moonsault after kicking Melina to the floor. Nitro makes a last second save. Crazy gets up and walks into the Snapshot (3D position but Mercury holds him there and Nitro hits a DDT) for the pin.

Rating: B. I know that’s probably high but I really liked this. The Mexicools were flying all over the place at times but it was never to the point where it was just high spots and nothing of actual significance. MNM was good too and Melina in that tiny skirt of hers helped too. Really fun tag match and I’d like to see them get a long match (this was about 9 minutes).

We’ll wrap it up several years later back in Mexico at Triplemania XX.

La Hermanadad 187 vs. Chessman/Juventud Guerrera vs. La Familia de Tijuana vs. Hart Foundation 2.0

La Hermanadad is Joe Lider and Psychosis, La Familia is Extreme Tiger and Halloween and the Hart Foundation is Jack Evans and Teddy Hart. This is a Parejas Suicidas cage match, which means it’s escape rules. The only team left in the ring has to face each other later in the night in a lucha de apuesta match. Apparently Lider and Psychosis are back together for one night only after Psychosis (who is wearing his mask again) was burned by an errant fireball.

Chessman is a tag champion with Abyss here but is teaming with Juvy for some reason. Speaking of Juvy, he’s Cruiserweight Champion, back in his mask, and comes out to Enter Sandman of all songs. As the announcer is doing the intros, La Hermanadad destroys everyone with chairs. Tiger gets up too and works over Lider, hitting a big double stomp off the top onto his chest.

Halloween climbs to the top of the cage for a huge dive, thinks better of it, and climbs down to escape. Smart man that painted freak. There are weapons in the cage too. That’s about the extent of the commentary I can give you here as everyone is fighting everyone and there’s no structure to the match at all, which is fine. Halloween is sitting in the aisle with a soda cheering Extreme Tiger on.

Someone ranas Tiger onto a trashcan and Lider hits a knee to the face of Evans. Tiger dropkicks a trashcan into Psychosis’ face as Guerrera escapes. Tiger gets on one of the beams across the top of the cage as Psychosis does the Terry Funk spinning ladder spot. Tiger hits a HUGE dive onto Halloween and Juvy, officially taking La Familia out of the match. In your twist of the match, Psychosis and Lider are fighting on top of the beam with Psychosis firing staples into Lider’s head. They’re partners but they entered the match for a chance to fight each other later. Psychosis gets to the floor.

To recap we have Lider, Evans, Hart and Chessman in the ring still. Evans does one of his WAY overdone flips to Lider before climbing the cage and moonsaulting off the beam. Evans escapes, leaving us with three people inside the cage. Halloween now has some popcorn to go with that soda. Hart hits some backbreakers on both guys followed by a moonsault off the cage.

Hart easily escapes and we’re down to Chessman vs. Lider. Lider crushes Chessman against a ladder and goes up, accepting help from Psychosis despite wanting to fight him. Chessman kicks Lider down though and escapes to send La Hermanadad to a match later tonight.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t so much of a match as much as it was a trainwreck with the focus entirely being on Lider and Psychosis. They were a long running feud so the blowoff being here tonight is a good thing and makes the most sense. The other teams were just kind of there but we got dives off the cage and the fans were into it which is a good thing.

And that match later tonight.

Psychosis vs. Joe Lider

Psychosis hits Lider in the head with a chair before Lider’s name graphic can appear on screen. Lider shrugs it off and smacks Psychosis with a chair of his own before taking Psychosis’ mask. Apparently he’s insisting that this is a hair vs. hair match instead of a mask vs. hair match. That makes sense because, in the words of Chris Rock regarding Psychosis: “WE KNOW WHAT YOU LOOK LIKE!”

Lider, who has his head taped up from the staplegun attack earlier, goes after Psychosis with the same gun and the fans freak out. A neckbreaker puts Lider down because staples into the head doesn’t slow anyone down apparently. Psychosis grabs a pair of chairs (where do these things come from? No one went to the floor to get them and they were in the ring when the match started. Did I wake up in WWF War Zone?) and crushes Lider’s head a few times.

Psychosis goes up but has a trashcan (again, WHERE DID THAT COME FROM?) placed on his head before getting slammed down onto the mat. Lider finds a ladder and smacks Psychosis in the head with it as we head to the apron. Psychosis fights back and slams Lider’s back into the apron before loading up a table against the apron. Back in and Psychosis goes up while holding a chair, only to get crotched on the top.

A top rope rana sends Psychosis into a trashcan for a VERY close two, which seems to be due to a crooked referee. Psychosis is part of Los Perros Del Mal which is part of La Sociedad. A chair shot puts Psychosis down and we’ve got a table. It’s already bent though, so Psychosis piles stuff on top of it. He goes up top and gets crotched again but as Lider loads up a superplex, Psychosis counters into a flip piledriver onto the ladder for the pin and Lider’s hair.

Rating: D. This match comes down to one question: do you like hardcore wrestling? If you do, you’ll like this match. If you don’t like it, you’ll hate this one. I’m not a fan of it and the match didn’t work as a result. Apparently this is a big and long feud so the people watching this would be more impressed with it than I was. I didn’t like the match for the most part but at least it was relatively short.

For a guy that barely ever won anything back in WCW, Psychosis had quite the career. He actually won another Cruiserweight Title, though it was awarded to him and he lost it in his first defense again. Over the many years he was in the ring, Psychosis actually had some really solid matches against a variety of opponents and there was a good deal of stuff I had to leave out. That’s really surprising as he was always a B level guy at best in almost any company he was in.

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Thunder
Date: July 1, 1999
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Mike Tenay

We’re into the second half of the year now and hopefully things are going to pick up. After Monday, we have Kevin Nash with Torrie and Gorgeous George and having beaten up eight or so men at once to close Nitro. However, Sting was seen behind the wheel of the Hummer to end the show, but Sting is a weird dude so it could mean a lot of things. Let’s get to it.

We open with the ending of Nitro.

Megadeath will be performing Crush Em live on Nitro.

Bret Hart will be on Nitro for his first comments in months.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Perry Saturn

Saturn jumps Kanyon on the floor before the bell as we hear about Savage and Sid leaving with the belt itself to close Nitro. Page tries to jump Saturn but gets caught in an overhead belly to belly. A Kanyon distraction sends everyone out to the floor and Saturn keeps his control. Back in and Saturn dropkicks knocks Kanyon off the apron, only to get knocked off the apron from behind. Kanyon gets in some cheap shots and things slow down again.

We take a break (and see part of the Crush Em video) and come back with absolutely nothing different. A powerslam plants Saturn but Page takes his sweet time following up. It’s off to an abdominal stretch with Kanyon helping in an old classic sequence. After a hiptoss breaks the hold, Saturn ducks the discus lariat and superkicks Page down for two.

Back up and a Batista Bomb gets the same on Saturn but he breaks up the Diamond Cutter, only to bump the referee at the same time. Kanyon comes in and wraps a title belt around the turnbuckle. Saturn goes after him but gets dropped onto the title, giving Page a very close two count. Cue Benoit for a Swan Dive on Page but Kanyon pulls the referee out at two for the DQ.

Rating: C+. Gah I was getting into that one before the ending. That’s pretty much the only thing they could do though as you want to keep both teams strong going into the title match at the PPV. It’s frustrating but I’d rather have them do this than have a challenger lose his momentum or a title made weak.

Benoit takes out Kanyon with a suicide dive but Bigelow comes out to make it 3-2. Benoit and Saturn get destroyed, which doesn’t bode well for their title match.

No Limit Solders vs. Disorderly Conduct

That would be B.A. (Brad Armstrong) and Swoll (picture an even bigger Ahmed Johnson with even less talent) vs. Mean Mike and Tough Tom. Swoll shoves Mike down with ease to start and we get some standard “I’m a big guy with huge muscles” offense including move shoves and slams for both Conducts. Off to Armstrong for a dropkick but Mike pokes him in the eye to take over.

That’s still not enough though as Armstrong dropkicks Tom and cranks on a headlock, only to be whipped into a knee from Mike to really change control. An ax handle to the back and a jawbreaker have Brad reeling and a neckbreaker is good for two. Disorderly Conduct starts some fast tags before Mike goes up and misses a knee drop. Swoll comes in off the hot tag and cleans more house as everything breaks down. Armstrong is whipped into Tom in the corner, setting up a palm strike to the chest to give Swoll the pin. Yeah the guy is about 6’6 and 340lbs and his finishing move is a palm strike.

Rating: D. Basic tag match here but I’m not sure how to feel for Armstrong. He was a talented guy but the only way he could get out there is to carry this guy due to the powers of nepotism (Swoll was Master P.’s cousin). On the other hand, it’s better than sitting at home and never getting on TV.

La Parka vs. Eddie Guerrero

The camera makes sure to get a shot of a guy in an LWO shirt. They’re actually trying for some continuity on this story and I’m digging it for a change. La Parka goes after him in the corner to start but Eddie is too quick for him. They send each other into the corner before Eddie tosses Parka out to the floor, following him out with a big dive. The announcers finally stop talking about Megadeath and Bret Hart for a second but the dive only has so much power.

La Parka is sent into various metal objects before going back inside. Eddie misses the slingshot hilo but nails La Parka in the back of the head before slingshotting onto him for two. We take a break and come back with La Parka firing off some hard kicks to Eddie’s back. He shouts into the camera that the LWO is dead, which I thought was a foregone conclusion. A chinlock goes nowhere so Eddie nails his tilt-a-whirl backbreaker to send La Parka rolling to the floor, where he picks up the chair.

Eddie follows him out and takes a chair shot to the ribs, which the referee doesn’t seem to mind. Back in and we hit a variety of chinlocks and chokes, followed by a belly to belly to put Guerrero down. He’s not down enough for La Parka’s corkscrew moonsault though and the crash lets Eddie run to the top for the Frog Splash and the pin.

Rating: C+. Eddie has been on a roll since he got back and this was no exception. This is what was always fun about the cruiserweight division: even the second and third string guys were capable of having a good match when they were given the chance. It’s a nice little TV match and that’s more than you usually get out of this show.

Savage is freaking out when his phone rings. We cut to Kevin Nash on the other end, getting a massage. Savage wants Gorgeous George back so Nash tells him to go to 16^th and Norfield in 14 minutes and wait by the pay phones. The look on Savage’s face is priceless as he’s just stunned that this is happening.

This Week In WCW Motorsports.

I Hate Rap video.

Silver King/Villano V/El Dandy/Damien vs. West Texas Rednecks

Barry quickly sends Silver King into the corner to start but misses a charge and eats a missile dropkick followed by a superkick. The Undoubtable El Dandy and Kendall come in with the less famous Windham hammering away and getting two off a backslide. Villano comes in with a clothesline to Kendall, sending him over to tag in Bobby.

Duncum takes a quick beating but it’s off to Damien vs. Hennig as the fast tags continue. Curt chops away in the corner and nails the knee lift. Damien tags Dandy back in for a jam up right hand to Hennig to take over. The luchadors start quadruple teaming Hennig until everything breaks down and Kendall grabs a bulldog on Damien for a pin.

Rating: C-. Not as bad as I was expecting here as they kept this moving. I’m glad they went with this formula too as there was no real need to have the Rednecks beat up a luchador for awhile or waste a lot of time in trouble when the ending is totally obvious. Nothing match but it could have been much worse.

Savage gets to the payphones and tries to figure out which one is ringing until he realizes it’s his own cell phone. Nash gives him a bunch of directions to tell Savage where to find him (two blocks down from Quick Pick in whatever city this is taking place in). Savage trying to remember all this is amusing.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Blitzkrieg

It’s a rare defense for Mysterio. We get the usual catchphrases from the No Limit Soldiers, including Armstrong in a bizarre moment. Feeling out process to start until Blitzkrieg runs into two boots in the corner and gets backdropped out to the apron. He misses a springboard spinwheel kick but catches Rey in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a near fall. A headscissors puts Blitzkrieg on the floor for a baseball slide, only to have him catch a diving Mysterio in a powerbomb on the floor.

We head back inside for some moonsaults and chinlocks from the challenger before Rey catches him in another tilt-a-whirl backbreaker (far too popular a move in this company). Blitzkrieg comes back with a clothesline but misses a springboard knee. Rey hits a kind of Stinger Splash in the corner but runs into a second clothesline. A dropkick knocks Blitzkrieg out of the air and the top rope hurricanrana retains the title.

Rating: C. This was back to the old “I do a spot then you do a spot then we both do a spot” formula that dominated the division for so long. It also furthers the idea that Blitzkrieg really wasn’t anything special in the ring and was much more flash than substance. Mysterio needs to drop the title already though as he’s completely outgrown the thing and it could be used to elevate someone else.

Savage’s Hummer pulls up on a street corner and Nash’s limo arrives a few seconds later. Nash gets out and talks about how sweet George is. Sid and Savage jump Nash until a clearly fake Sting breaks a ball bat over Nash’s back. Sid takes the girl in the back seat (clearly Torrie) and puts her in the Hummer as Nash is left laying.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Buff Bagwell

We get the usual catchphrases from both until Steiner nails him in the back with a dog collar. They head outside with Rick piledriveing on the concrete and hot shotting him onto the barricade. Back in and Buff nails a dropkick and neckbreaker because being dropped head and throat first onto concrete and steel don’t have any real effect on him. Buff gets knocked to the floor as we take a break and get to see the rest of the Crush Em video. Yeah remember that from an hour and a half ago?

Back with the champ choking with his chain and then putting on a chinlock. Again, why do we even bother with referees in this company anymore? Rick punches him in the neck a few times and we’re right back to the chinlock. After a minute or so of that, we switch to a reverse chinlock to keep things fresh. Buff fights up after two arm drops but Rick stops the comeback after about eight seconds. He puts Bagwell on top but gets kicked away as Buff loads up the Blockbuster. Not that it matters though as David Flair comes out to tase Buff (again, WCW referees are WORTHLESS), giving Rick an easy pin.

Rating: D. Again, why in the world is Rick Steiner getting this kind of a push? He doesn’t do anything other than punches and hard rest holds but for some reason he’s spent months as the TV Champion. Speaking of Steiners as champions, has Scott been seen since he beat Buff at the PPV a few months back? Also, this drops Buff to 1-3 since he pinned Flair in the eight man tag, with the one win coming via DQ and being followed by a beatdown from Sid and Savage.

Savage opens the car door and finds Torrie because Nash is not only able to beat up eight guys at once and leave with the girls, but he’s SMART too!

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling, save for the main event which was barely wrestling, was tolerable here and it brings the show up a bit. The Nash and Savage stuff is straight out of a low budget movie, which could be a good or bad thing based on your taste. However, at the end of the day we’re looking at yet another horrible main event match at Bash at the Beach because no one EVER breaks into the main event around here. The old vs. new story looks to be dead at this point with the new generation shoved back down the card to where they have been forever now. At least Piper and Flair can draw though and that’s what matters.

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Today we’re looking at a real American: the Patriot.

The Patriot, played by Del Wilkes, got his start in the AWA as the Trooper, a police officer. Here he is at some point in 1990 on AWA Championship Wrestling on ESPN.

Trooper vs. Kent Carlson

There’s a masked man sitting in the audience. Trooper hammers away with left hands out of the corner to start before slapping Carlson across the ring. A left hand to the ribs drops Carlson again and a belly to back suplex gets two. Trooper plants him with an Alabama Slam and a bad looking dropkick puts Kent down again. The Big Pinch, a nerve hold, makes Carlson submit. Total squash.

Next up was the Dallas based Global Wrestling Federation. From some point around 1991 under his better known name.

Tom Davis vs. The Patriot

Davis takes him into the corner to start as Scotty Anthony (later known as Raven) comes to commentary to say the masked Patriot is a Russian spy named Vladimir. A rollup sends Davis to the apron and Patriot works on the arm. Anthony praises Joseph McCarthy as the last real patriot in America. Patriot takes him down with a headlock as Anthony needs quiet from the audience to do commentary.

Tom bails to talk with his brother Mike before getting caught in a headlock back inside. Davis snapmares him down and gets two off a legdrop as Anthony thinks Davis writes Garfield. Anthony: “A win over the Patriot would be a feather in his cap, if in fact he had a cap on.” The full nelson slam plants Davis and the Patriot Missile (top rope shoulder) is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing to see but the commentary was hilarious. Raven is one of the funniest guys in wrestling and can crack me up almost every time he’s given the chance. Patriot was good for a spot like this but he was ready to move up to a bigger role soon after this.

Patriot would jump to WCW in early 1994, including this match on Saturday Night, March 20, 1994.

Lord Steven Regal vs. The Patriot

Regal’s TV Title isn’t on the line here. They circle around for well over a minute to start with Patriot getting the crowd behind him. Patriot takes him down with an armdrag into an armbar for early control. Regal fires off a European uppercut as Bischoff and Ventura have a bet over who is going to throw a punch first.

Patriot hooks a short arm scissors but Regal uses some nice technical stuff to fight up into an armbar. More uppercuts stagger Patriot and Regal cranks on an armbar of his own. Back up and the arm gets wrapped around the top rope but Patriot sends him face first into the buckle. Patriot throws the first punch and Jesse wins the bet. Regal gets caught in a quick Boston crab but Regal’s manager Sir William comes in for the DQ.

Rating: C. The ending hurts this as it needed another five minutes to keep going. The arm stuff worked here as we had a nice back and forth technical match instead of just doing the usual style that didn’t go anywhere. Regal can make that style work very well and Patriot was hanging with him while the match lasted.

Patriot would join forces with Marcus Bagwell in the team Stars N Stripes. Here they are challenging for the titles at Fall Brawl 1994.

Tag Titles: Pretty Wonderful vs. Stars N Stripes

We see Barry Darsow AGAIN but this time he’s being thrown out. Seriously, Paul Orndorff and Paul Roma are the tag champions and it’s 1994. Let that sink in for a bit. Bagwell shakes hands with Penzer. I kind of like that for some reason. It’s nice if nothing else. What the heck happened to this kid? He became the biggest dick I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen my share of big dicks. Oh just leave it alone.

The Patriot apparently changed houses between this and Halloween Havoc as he’s billed as from DC here and South Carolina next time. Roma and Orndorff are reminding me of Billy and Chuck. They actually call the previous sham a match. I’ve heard it all now. Other than Admin KB, but I think that could come this year. Stars N Stripes beat the champions in a non title match to set this up. They make fun of the WWF and say these are wrestlers and not bodybuilders.

Keep in mind that Bagwell would become Buff Bagwell in a few years and Orndorff was Mr. Wonderful for his muscles. And yeah you guessed it, the match sucks. Nothing at all of note goes on here as it’s just four guys with no heat having a tag team match. Thankfully it’s shorter than their rematch next month.

Yes, Orndorff and Roma got to fight on PPV again, but as challengers where they won the belts again. Anyway, this is just boring as all goodness . Orndorff dumps a cooler with soda and ice onto Bagwell for no apparent reason and miscommunication between the faces ends this.

Rating: D+. Now remember, Regal and Austin lost their titles tonight, but Roma and Orndorff keep theirs. Let that sink in a bit. To further the pure stupidity of this company, these teams fought again SIX DAYS LATER and the faces won the belts, which they held until October, only to lose them back to Paul and Paul, before Stars N Stripes won them AGAIN, before losing them to Harlem Heat for their first reign. Did Orndorff save Hogan from drowning in cocaine or something once?

The team would win the belts on TV soon after this and defended them at Halloween Havoc 1994.

Tag Titles: Stars N Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

Pretty Wonderful are the former champions here as Stars N Stripes beat them about a month earlier. Good night do those teams sound generic. Pretty Wonderful is made up of Pretty Paul Roma and Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff. Stars N Stripes are Bagwell and the Patriot. I really am not looking forward to this. This just sounds like a bad match on an indy show or something like that.

Heenan suggests that the Patriot is Al Gore. Something tells me that Bobby is going to be all that gets me through this match and show. Bagwell was a five time champion with four different partners. That either says he’s a great tag wrestler or he has no direction so they kept throwing him in random tag teams because he had a big contract and they had nothing else to do with him.

You can tell the announcers are just bored to death as they’re arguing over what a tag is and then there’s something about Dennis Rodman. This is just BORING. They actually say this is the last night Hogan will face Flair. That’s just hilarious. They wrestled 15 years later and likely will in TNA also. They discuss the Lions’ Super Bowl chances. This is just amusing. Nothing at all is going on in the match.

They say that Tiger Stadium and Yankee Stadium are the last great ballparks. The real last great ballparks are the ones still in use today: Fenway and Wrigley. Heenan says that once all of the matches are over, no one is going to take a shower because they’ll all be watching the cage match.

Ok, number one, why does Heenan know the showering habits of the wrestlers and why would no one take a shower after their match when they have about an hour and a half before the main event? How clean do they like to get? The fans are more or less dead for this by the way. Bagwell hits the suplex and Wonderful hits an elbow on him to get the titles. This was somehow worse than the previous match.

Rating: D-. I have never cared less about a match than I did here. I’ve always thought Bagwell was hot and there’s a former Horseman in there though so it’s not a failure. The announcers were bored too as this was just bland as all goodness. The match didn’t work, but the tag division around this time was a disaster anyway.

One last match at Clash XXIX.

Tag Team Titles: Stars and Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

This is Pretty Wonderful’s titles vs. the Patriot’s mask. The teams have traded the titles over the last few months with Pretty Wonderful starting as champions but losing the belts to Stars and Stripes before taking them back a month later. Orndorff and Bagwell get things going and it’s quickly off to Roma as the champions gain an early advantage. Roma jumps over Marcus twice in the corner and hits a quick cross body for two but Bagwell comes back with a dropkick and the challengers clean house.

Back in and it’s off to Patriot vs. Orndorff and both guys miss elbow drops before trading hammerlocks on the mat. Patriot takes control on the mat for a bit but Orndorff buries a knee in the ribs to give the champions the advantage. Roma comes back in for three straight backbreakers followed by a top rope fist to the face and a near fall. Back up and Patriot scores with an atomic drop and a second for good measure. A Thesz Press gets two and it’s off to Bagwell for some arm work.

Marcus dives at Roma but gets dropped over the top with the camera missing most of whatever happened. Orndorff goes outside for some knees to the ribs and it’s back inside for some right hands to the face. Roma comes back in for a nice dropkick and a powerslam but he poses instead of covering. Back to Orndorff who gets caught in a backslide by Marcus for two and a sunset flip for the same. Everything breaks down and the champions load up their suplex/top rope splash combo, but Patriot shoves Roma off the top and Bagwell counters the suplex into a pin for the titles out of nowhere.

Rating: C. It’s not a great match but the fans loved the ending and there’s nothing wrong with having the fans explode to open a show. Stars and Stripes were another young team who didn’t last long but were easy to cheer for and had decent enough matches to validate the push.

Here’s another title shot at Clash XXX.

Tag Team Titles: Harlem Heat vs. Stars and Stripes

Harlem Heat won the belts earlier in the month and this is the rematch. We have no Stars and Stripes to start but we do get Nature Boy Ric Flair with two very nice looking women. He walks by Vader with no incident and goes to his seat. Booker and Bagwell get things going with Marcus stomping him down in the corner but running into a boot in the corner. He comes right back with a dropkick for both champions as Stars and Stripes stands tall.

It’s off to Patriot for a double backdrop on Booker for two. He cranks on Booker’s arm as the fans chant USA. Stevie comes in but walks into a wristlock from Patriot before it’s back to Bagwell for the same hold. A knee to the ribs stops Marcus cold and the champions take over. The advantage only lasts for a few seconds though as it’s quickly back to Patriot for more arm work. A belly to belly gets two on Booker but Stevie saves his brother from a monkey flip.

Back to Stevie for some heavy stomping and he draws in Patriot so Booker can choke from the apron. A running forearm gets two for Booker and it’s off to the chinlock. Marcus fights up but both guys try cross bodies to put him right back down. Sherri gets up on the apron for a distraction so Bagwell’s tag to the Patriot doesn’t count. She takes her shoe off but accidentally hits Booker by mistake. Bagwell rolls him up for two but Stevie kicks Marcus in the face to give Booker the pin to retain.

Rating: C. It’s not bad and more entertaining than the other matches tonight. They let the match have a little more time and things got better as a result which is usually the case. Harlem Heat was getting much better and this more or less ended Stars and Stripes as a team. Good enough to get by.

After a few years in All Japan, Patriot would be signed by the WWF. Here’s one of his first matches on Raw, July 28, 1997.

Bret Hart vs. The Patriot

Bret is all evil and Canadian here and Shawn is on commentary. We can’t start immediately though as Bret insists on O Canada being played. That’s not cool with Patriot who wants to hear the Star Spangled Banner. Like a true villain though, Bret jumps him during the song and we’re ready to go. The song is still going as Bret hammers away before choking on the ropes. Hart stomps away in the corner as Shawn says he stands for truth, justice and the American way. Patriot fights back with a big right hand and they fight outside with Patriot in control.

Back in and the Patriot Missile connects for two and we take a break. We come back with Bret suplexing Patriot down as we see him putting the Figure Four on around the pole during the break. A backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow but Patriot fights back in the corner. He loads up Uncle Slam (full nelson slam) but the referee gets bumped. Bret nails a piledriver but there’s no referee. Shawn trips Bret up though and the distraction lets Patriot grab the longest rollup in history for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a natural matchup during the Border War with Patriot being the Kurt Angle of his day, minus the whole Olympic Gold Medal part of course. Bret and Shawn would have their issues until the end of time, including six days after this with Shawn refereeing Bret’s WWF Title match at Summerslam.

That win alone was enough to give Patriot a title shot at In Your House XVII.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. The Patriot

Patriot comes out to what would become Kurt Angle’s theme song. Bret jumps him to start before tying Patriot up in the Tree of Woe for some kicks to the ribs. The fans chant USA to tick Bret off even more so he rakes Patriot’s eyes through the mask. The left handed Patriot comes back with a clothesline and a nice dropkick before clotheslining the champion out to the floor. Bret takes his sweet time on the floor before heading back inside to hide in the corner.

Some nice armdrags put Bret down as the pace picks up a good bit. We hit the armbar Patriot sends Bret’s shoulder into the buckle before slapping on the armbar again. Hart finally makes it to the corner to break up the hold but Patriot wraps the weak arm around the ropes again. Bret comes back with some kicks to the ribs before focusing in on the knee. He cannonballs down onto the knee a few times before just punching the side of Patriot’s leg.

Patriot limps around the ring while holding the top rope but Bret kicks his knee out again to take him down. There’s a spinning toehold of all things from the champion before he locks on the Figure Four around the post. Back in and Patriot fights up as British Bulldog makes his way out to ringside. Bret takes Patriot down with a Russian legsweep and the fans chant for Austin. Patriot comes back with a kick to the side of Bret’s head and gets two off a sunset flip.

The challenger starts coming back with a left hand to the ribs and a legdrop but Bulldog’s distraction lets Bret take over again. Bret accidentally hits the Bulldog, allowing Patriot to get a rollup for two and a BIG pop from the crowd. The Uncle Slam (a full nelson slam) gets two for Patriot but Bulldog makes the save. Patriot goes after Bulldog and here’s Vader to help deal with the Englishman. Bret and Vader get in a fight but the match continues.

Vader and Bulldog are taken to the back and Patriot goes up top for his Patriot Missile (top rope shoulder) but Bret gets up at two. There was nowhere near as much of a reaction for that count as the previous ones. A suplex gets two more on Bret but he grabs a quick Stun Gun to put Patriot down again. The bulldog and middle rope elbow get two for Bret but Patriot slugs away at him in the corner.

The referee gets hit in the face with an elbow and as luck would have it, Patriot hits the Uncle Slam again just a few seconds later. It’s only good for two when the referee wakes up but it’s too late. A double clothesline puts both guys down but it’s Patriot up first, sending Bret chest first into the buckle. With nothing left to try, Patriot puts Bret in the Sharpshooter but Bret counters into one of his own and Patriot gives up, despite being about a foot from the rope.

Rating: B. The match worked well but the ending hurt it a good bit. Patriot is fighting for America and all that jazz, but he gives up instead of crawling another ten inches? The match took awhile to get going but once we got to the interference and all that jazz, things picked up a good bit.

Here’s Patriot on Raw, September 8, 1997.

Patriot vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. British Bulldog

Shawn and HHH jump the Bulldog on his way to the ring. They ram his knee into the ramp and crush it with a chair to set up the match at One Night Only. Back from a break and Savio has jumped into the match and is replacing Bulldog I guess. This is back when the match wasn’t a total cliché that was required at least once a month. HHH gets double teamed and elbowed down but the alliance ends quickly with Patriot clotheslining HHH down and getting kicked in the face for his efforts.

Savio gets knocked to the floor and HHH drops a knee on Patriot for two. HHH pounds away on Patriot’s head but Savio comes gets jealous and pounds away on Patriot instead. I’ve never understood the logic behind that: why not let HHH expend energy and then jump him later on? Shawn comes out for commentary as we take a break.

Back with Savio hitting a spinwheel kick in the corner on HHH, followed by a DDT from Patriot on the future Game for two. Patriot and Savio take turns beating on HHH but neither guy can get more than a one. Patriot suplexes Savio down but HHH breaks it up before there’s even a cover. Savio tries a sunset flip on HHH and after Patriot breaks up HHH’s hold on the ropes, it gets two.

The fans are booing something here and to be fair, it’s probably the match as it’s not working at all for the most part. Shawn is ripping Vince apart on commentary because of how stupid Vince sounds. Savio kicks HHH’s head off, making Shawn speak Spanish. Savio puts a headscissors on HHH and Patriot puts a headscissors on Savio at the same time as we take a break.

Back with Patriot chopping away on Savio and vice versa. HHH breaks up a cover on Savio and the booing gets louder. Patriot and HHH literally stand still and choke each other as a LOUD boring chant breaks out. Vince complains about Shawn’s change of attitude. Shawn: “Well it was you that told me to change.”

The Pedigree is countered and Savio lands on the referee. HHH throws Patriot to the floor and loads up a Pedigree on Savio, only to be catapulted into Patriot, crotching the guy that comes out to Kurt Angle’s music (Patriot if you’re kind of slow). Savio kicks HHH’s head off but Shawn distracts him before the cover. HHH rams Savio into the Patriot and rolls up Vega for the pin.

Rating: D-. WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA??? They should be made to sit and watch this match over and over again until they scream for mercy. I mean DANG this didn’t work at all. Someone thought giving this SEVENTEEN MINUTES was a good idea. Savio comes completely out of nowhere (he had been feuding with the original Nation of Domination) and jumps in the match, which makes absolutely no sense. Taking Bulldog out was a problem as at least he would have given us three distinct groups (Harts, Anti-Harts, future DX) in the match, but instead it was a total mess and VERY dull. Terrible main event.

Maybe he’ll have better luck in England. From One Night Only.

Flash Funk vs. The Patriot

Flash Funk is more commonly known as 2 Cold Scorpio and is a pimp without the name of being one. Patriot showed up a few weeks before this and somehow had a title shot at the previous PPV which went nowhere. Naturally he “came within an eyelash” but that didn’t mean anything after that show.

Patriot has Angle’s old music which it’s just odd to hear in 1997. He’s more or less a heel here since he comes out with the American flag. Patriot says he wears a mask because he represents the face of every American. I don’t know that many men that have golden skin like that. Flash is wearing a freaking zoot suit. This isn’t as good of a match as it could be but it’s ok I guess.

It’s about as generic as you could get but that’s fine. Vince calls Flash the Funkmeister. I’m done. Patriot was just annoying at this point. He wasn’t that good at all but was built up to be this great worker which he just wasn’t at all. They keep saying the reason they’re not being all violent and such is because they don’t hate each other. That’s better than nothing I guess.

If nothing else this should tell you everything you need to know about Patriot: his finishers are a full nelson slam called the Uncle Slam and a top rope shoulder block called the Patriot Missile. Funk’s finisher is called the Funky Flash Splash. A full nelson slam ends this. That was a waste of time.

Rating: C-. Again, this was just there. It wasn’t particularly good or bad, but Patriot got some decent heat which is really all you can ask for. Funk went for a big move from the top and it missed for the Uncle Slam. That’s better than nothing I guess. It could have been a lot worse I guess, but this just wasn’t the best choice of a pairing.

We’ll wrap it up at In Your House XVIII with a flag match.

Bret Hart/British Bulldog vs. Vader/The Patriot

This is a flag match and you can win by pinfall, submission, or capturing your country’s flag from the poles in the corners. It’s a big brawl on the floor to start with everyone fighting on the floor. Vader pounds on Bret with a Canadian flag pole but Bret sends him into the steps. Now it’s Bret hitting Vader with the pole as Bulldog does the same to Patriot in the aisle. We’re still waiting for an opening bell. They change positions and the Foundation members are both down.

We finally get a bell as the Americans are alone in the ring. Why they don’t go up for the flag is anyone’s guess but everyone stands around instead of doing anything. Patriot finally goes up for it but gets pulled down by Bulldog. A snap suplex puts Bulldog down but Bret distracts Patriot from climbing. Vader comes in and runs Bulldog over before it’s off to Bret for the first time. Hart tries to slug it out and is easily punched down into the corner for his efforts.

Bret avoids a charge into the corner and takes Vader down with a Russian legsweep. Vader easily breaks up an attempt at climbing with a low blow before sitting on Bret’s chest for two. Back to Patriot vs. Bulldog with the masked man mostly missing a dropkick for two on Davey. Patriot goes for the flag very slowly and Bret breaks it up again. Vader does the same to the Bulldog as things slow down. Bret sends Patriot’s shoulder into the post and puts on the Figure Four around the same post for good measure.

Back in and Bret drops a headbutt to the abdomen before putting on the Sharpshooter, but Patriot easily reverses into one of his own. That’s broken up just as easily until all four go into the same corner. Bulldog throws Patriot off and the match slows back down again. Patriot kicks Smith away and finally makes the tag off to Vader to almost no reaction. Bulldog scores with a quick belly to back suplex but Vader runs him over and drops a splash for two.

Vader can’t get to the flag either as Bulldog pulls him back down and we hit the chinlock. Back to Bret for a Sharpshooter but Vader is right next to the ropes. Patriot comes in without a tag to break up the hold anyway and Vader takes over. Now it’s a Sharpshooter from Vader to Bret as the fans are trying to get into the match. Bulldog breaks up the Sharpshooter so it’s Patriot in again with a Figure Four. Smith breaks it up again and comes in for the delayed vertical suplex. Patriot is knocked down again while trying to climb so it’s back to Bret.

Hart drops some knees and elbows but Vader easily stops him from getting the flag. Now it’s back to Vader vs. Bulldog but the masked man misses his moonsault, only to LAND ON HIS FEET. That’s INSANE. Anyway he pounds Bulldog down into the corner but Bret stops an attempt at the flag. Instead Vader clotheslines Bulldog to the floor but gets nailed in the head with the bell.

They head inside again where Bret easily slams Vader and drops a few legs. Vader fights up and clotheslines both Foundation members down, allowing for a lukewarm at best tag to Patriot. House is cleaned and the Uncle Slam gets two on Bret. A fan comes in and is easily taken out by security. The Vader Bomb crushes Bret but Vader isn’t legal, so Bret gets a quick rollup on Patriot for the pin.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t a horrible match but again it just went on WAY too long. This was nearly half an hour long and could have easily been done in about twelve minutes. The flags weren’t a factor at all as none of the attempts to get them even came close. It would also be the last major appearance of Patriot who tore his triceps a few weeks later and retired as a result.

Patriot is a guy that fills in a very logical role. He looks great, he has an easy character and he can have a decent match. It’s a shame that he tore his triceps and was released less than a year into his WWF run. Patriot was a good hand in the ring and could have been something better in a different era of the WWF. With Austin rising up the card though and DX soon to turn face, there just wasn’t room for him though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Monday Nitro #194
Date: June 28, 1999
Location: United Center, Chicago, Illinois
Attendance: 16,210
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’ve got two shows left before Bash at the Beach and the big story tonight is Ric Flair having some sort of a big surprise for World Champion Kevin Nash. The last week of shows was better than the stuff they’ve been putting on lately, although that really doesn’t cover much. You never can tell what sort of nonsense you’re going to get on here so let’s get to it.

The Flairs arrive with the owner of the United CenterBruce McArthur. He offers to build a statue of David Flair bigger than the one of Michael Jordan.

Nitro Girls.

It’s Nash vs. Flair tonight. David Flair that is.

Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn vs. Fit Finlay/Steven Regal

Fallout from Thunder where Regal returned and yelled at Finlay and Dave Taylor, who is on the floor for this one. Regal rips on America before the match starts like a good villain should. Finlay cranks on the arm to start but Benoit takes his head off with a clothesline as we take a quick break. Back with Finlay sending Regal to the floor before dropping him throat first over the top rope.

Off to Regal as we hear about a dance off later in the show. He works on Saturn’s arm for a bit but walks into a belly to belly. Regal tags in Finlay for a sleeper, only to have Saturn counter into one of his own. Regal draws in Benoit like the old villain he is, allowing him to hit Saturn in the back with the British flag pole. We get a double tag and Benoit runs Regal over with clotheslines and a suplex sets up the Swan Dive. Finlay makes a save and Regal puts Saturn in the Regal Stretch, only to have Benoit make the save, setting up a Death Valley Driver for the pin on Regal.

Rating: C+. Would you expect these four to have anything bad? Regal is every bit as awesome as he used to be with the little heel mannerisms that you only get from a veteran. It’s nice to see Benoit and Saturn get a win to help set up their match at the Bash because they probably don’t have much of a chance there.

DJ Ran.

Van Hammer comes in to see the bosses and would like a title shot. His reward: a TV Title shot against Rick Steiner at the PPV.

Gene brings out the bosses minus Piper for some reason. Why Anderson has changed his clothes since the last segment isn’t really clear. Flair rips on the crowd with the old standard sports lines before Piper comes out and does exactly the same. Piper rips on Howard Stern in his weekly story that most people don’t care about. Apparently the power structure around here won’t let Ric be the World Champion again so David is going to do it in his place. The title match is happening tonight and it’s going to be a lumberjack match.

This brings Flair to Randy Savage, who he’d like to see out here right now. Savage, Sid and the girls come out and Flair wants them all to be lumberjacks. Ric sweetens the pot a bit by offering to reinstate the elbow. Little Naitch protests and is basically told to shut up. Savage rambles a lot before accepting.

Lodi teaches Lenny Lane to paint his nails. Lenny asks when WCW is going to find out about them but Lodi says they’re not the only ones. Lodi: “You got me babe and I got you.”

Lodi vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie pounds away to start but Lodi sends him into the referee in less than thirty seconds. Lenny comes in and gets dropkicked down as Eddie armdrags Lodi at the same time. A brainbuster plants Lodi and Eddie loads up the Frog Splash, only to have Lenny crawl on top of Lodi. That’s fine with Eddie who splashes Lenny’s back and pins Lodi. Uh….comedy?

Torrie, David and Piper are in the back and recruit the Triad to be lumberjacks.

DJ Ran.

Nitro Girls.

Here’s Hak to ask if fans want to see him get extreme. Remember that Flair banned hardcore matches on Thunder a few weeks back. Hak wants Flair out here now but gets Bigelow instead.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Hak

Bigelow jumps Hak to start and splashes him in the corner, only to run into a boot. Hak clotheslines him out to the floor but his plancha is easily caught, allowing Bigelow to ram him into the post. Back in and Bigelow keeps using the fat man offense, only to miss the top rope headbutt. Not that it matters as Hak misses the swanton but comes back with a swinging DDT. Cue the rest of the Triad but Hak nails them with the stick and gives Bigelow the White Russian legsweep. Page comes in for the Diamond Cutter to give Bigelow the pin.

Rating: D. So now it takes three people to beat HAK? I’m not sure why they bothered to get rid of the hardcore matches as it leaves guys like him to try and work a regular match which just isn’t going to happen. He hit a nice DDT and that’s about the extent of wrestling Hak seems capable of doing. Why sign him if you’re going to take away the only thing people like seeing him do?

Here’s Nash with something to say. WCW still doesn’t want him as champion and his only friend is at home in Orlando. However, he’ll put up the title tonight with the stipulation that if he wins, he gets Torrie for 72 hours. He doesn’t need a week you see because after 72 hours with him, Torrie will be ruined.

DJ Ran again.

NWO vs. West Texas Rednecks

Sure why not. That would be Stevie/Vincent/Brian Adams/Horace. It’s Barry vs. Adams to start with Windham slapping him in the face. An armdrag sets up a DDT from Barry but Adams presses him into the air, only to have Barry slip out and roll him up for two. Off to Hennig vs. Stevie with the big man running over Curt and stomping away in the corner.

Kendall comes in and takes a clothesline before it’s off to Vincent for a stomping of his own. Off to Horace who is quickly caught in the Redneck corner. Hennig comes in for his running kneelift before Barry nails a top rope clothesline. Bobby kicks Horace in the face but Adams trips him up, allowing for the hot tag (?) to Vincent. Everything breaks down and a double bulldog to Vincent is enough for the pin.

Rating: D. Who books an eight man all heel tag match? The NWO hasn’t wrestled together in months and I have no idea why they’re even a thing anymore. The Rednecks are an interesting idea and the song is incredibly catchy, even though booking them as heels isn’t a good idea. It helps that we didn’t have to hear Master P. shouting like an idiot this week though.

Time for a dance contest between Disco Inferno and Ernest Miller. The Nitro Girls are the judges to try and make this not horrible. Scratch that as we’re going by fan applause, making the Girls pure eye candy. Miller says he could beat Jerry Flynn too, likely setting up a run in. Ernest does his usual routine, Disco does his usual routine, Miller jumps Disco and we’ve got a match.

The Cat vs. Disco Inferno

Disco is in trouble to start but makes a quick comeback with an atomic drop and dancing middle rope elbow. Cat comes back with chops and kicks before sending Disco outside for kicks from Sonny. Back in and Disco hits a Chartbuster out of nowhere but takes forever to cover, allowing Sonny to come in. That goes badly for Cat too as Sonny hits his man but slips him the red shoe. Miller knocks Disco sillier but Jerry Flynn runs out for the no contest.

Flynn wants a kickboxing match with Miller next week. We just spent five minutes setting up kickboxing with Jerry Flynn. This show is done.

DJ Ran.

Tag Team Titles: Buff Bagwell/Dean Malenko vs. Jersey Triad

Flair and company come out to the announcers’ table and announce Anderson as referee for the main event tonight because he’s still not over the NWO parody of his retirement. Bigelow starts on the floor as Malenko rolls up Page for some fast two counts. Off to Bagwell vs. Kanyon with Kanyon mocking Buff’s dance in a funny bit. Buff nails a quick atomic drop and a swinging neckbreaker before it’s back to Dean. Malenko sunset flips Kanyon but Page gets a blind tag and nails Dean to take over.

Bigelow comes in for a 3-1 beatdown with Kanyon hitting a middle rope legdrop for two. Page gets the same off a tilt-a-whirl slam and we take a break. Back with Page clotheslining Malenko for two, only to have Dean escape a tilt-a-whirl slam and make the hot tag to Buff. Bagwell cleans house on the legal Kanyon but Bigelow grabs his leg to break up the Blockbuster.

Bigelow and Kanyon take turns on Buff before it’s off to Page for an elbow drop. Buff crawls around the ring but finally grabs a sunset flip for two. Malenko tags himself in but the referee goes down quickly. Everything breaks down and Buff Blockbusters Kanyon, only to have Bigelow come in for the double Diamond Cutter to pin Dean.

Rating: C-. Take pretty much every Triad match so far and you have the same thing here. The young team gets beaten down again, the old guys rule the day and the fans are punched in the ribs again. That’s basically WCW in a nutshell at this point, as the young guys continue to look like nothing next to the veterans.

We get the world premiere of the I Hate Rap video. This is still awesome and Curt Hennig is still the only West Texas Redneck from Minnesota.

Sid Vicious vs. Scott Putski

I really don’t see this going well. Sid has Savage and all three girls with him and takes nearly two minutes to get to the ring. The bell rings and there’s no contact for over a minute. The girls get on the apron and the guys haven’t touched each other in the first ninety seconds. The girls keep rubbing Scott’s back from the apron until Sid FINALLY hits him after nearly two minutes.

In the span of another minute, Sid hits him about five times while the fans are very bored. A snapmare puts Putski down and the chant turns to Goldberg. The chokeslam plants Scott but Sid would rather walk around than cover. The powerbomb finally ends it after nearly five minutes.

Rating: F. If they were going out there and trying to tick the fans off, they’ve succeeded at something for the first time in months. This was a match that should have lasted thirty seconds but instead Sid stood around and yelled for minutes at a time after having the longest entrance this side of Undertaker. Why even bother with the match at this point?

Post match Savage and Sid say Nash is next and Randy drops an elbow on Putski. Somehow from the time Scott’s music hit to the time they went to a break was ten minutes long. Does that look like a ten minute segment to you?

Nitro Girls.

WCW World Title: David Flair vs. Kevin Nash

Lumberjack match with Arn Anderson as referee and Savage, Sid, the girls, Ric, Piper and the Triad around the ring. David even has one of his dad’s robes for a nice touch. The announcers already start talking about how Nash is up against the wall and the lumberjacks all come in to go after him. Nash is quickly down in the corner as David bails to the floor. Arn of course has something in his eye this whole time but gets it clean as David puts on the Figure Four for a two count.

Nash wakes up and hammers away as the beating is on in a hurry. He hits all the usual stuff as the lumberjacks come in again. Nash of course fights off ALL OF THEM and takes a taser away from David. The villains are shocked and Nash kidnaps Gorgeous George as Torrie leaves willingly with Nash.

The three of them go to the back towards Nash’s limo but see a Hummer. Sting’s face can be seen in the mirror and Nash sees him before leaving in the limo with the girls to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. So let’s look at the last half hour of this show. We have a ten minute Sid vs. Scott Putski match and Kevin Nash fighting off eight men and getting to leave with two gorgeous blondes. I’m sure the latter has nothing to do with him being the booker whatsoever. Over on Raw, Steve Austin was beating the Undertaker for the WWF Title in the highest rated match in the history of Monday Night Raw. This week felt like WCW was actively trying to lose and that isn’t a good sign as we head into the second half of the year.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Today we’re looking at an underrated power guy in Mike Enos.

Enos got his start in the AWA in its dying days as part of Larry’s Legends in the Team Challenge Series. Here’s an example of what that meant from a show in January of 1990.

The Trooper vs. Mike Enos

Enos is one of Larry’s Legends and I have no clue on The Trooper. Larry is a champion of some kind here. Apparently he’s world champion as we continue to try to get this down to a specified date. Apparently you have to get a football in a goal and you can’t throw it. There is going to be a player on offense and one on defense and downs. First to five wins. Oh dear. They’re wearing helmets and full pads. Oh good night.

They’re having a jump ball for offense first. And the referee knocks Enos into the hockey goal behind him. 1-0 Trooper. And now they’re using wrestling moves on each other. I hate my life. Oh so each possession is 45 seconds apparently. 2-0 Trooper. They pointed out that Trooper played two years in the NFL. Oh and the Vikings donated the equipment here.

Enos stalls a lot. Trooper recovers a fumble to make it 3-0. More stalling ensues as we’re approaching ten minutes for this. Drop toe holds are legal? Enos hits a helmet to the knee and doesn’t go for the score of course. Oh ok it’s 3-1 now. So Enos beat the tar out of the leg so Trooper can’t move. PSYCHOLOGY? HERE? 3-2 as Enos throws the ball in even though that was deemed illegal earlier.

And the referee hits Enos for no apparent reason. They’s in football gear and using leg locks. WOW I hate this company. Tied up at three. Trooper is thrown to the floor, meaning this is going to take even more time. 4-3 Enos. What is in the water in Minnesota that they actually created this? Trooper makes it 4 all and we’re at next goal wins. And the referee knocks down Enos so Trooper can win unopposed. Oh my freaking goodness.

Rating: S. Sixteen minutes. Sixteen minutes. THEY SPENT SIXTEEN MINUTES ON THIS CRAP??? This is worse than the Doomsday Cage. I didn’t think that was possible. Why am I watching this nonsense? Granted it’s hard to blame this on either guy because this really had nothing to do with wrestling.

Off to a more stable company with WCW’s WrestleWar 1990.

Skyscrapers vs. Road Warriors

Street fight. The Skyscrapers are almost a revolving door of members and in this case it’s Mark Callous and a masked man who is played by Mike Enos. The Skyscrapers have Teddy Long to counter Paul Ellering. Long comes in to fight Ellering and is knocked to the floor with one punch. Everyone is in street clothes. What street these would be normal on I have no idea but the thought is there.

The Warriors dominate to start and here comes Doom for no apparent reason. They’re in suits and Teddy goes to join them. Enos gets in some offense to take over (he’s just the masked man here but I’ll be calling him Enos to keep things clearer) but it’s pretty short lived. The Road Warriors shrug it off and Hawk hits a running clothesline off the apron to Callous. They get back in and this slows down even more. The Warriors throw Callous out and the Doomsday Device kills Enos easily for the pin.

Rating: D. I love the Road Warriors but they need the right kind of team to make things work. The Skyscrapers were never quite a team that worked, at least not here. They were good at destroying jobbers and small people but having brawls like this was never really anything worth seeing.

We’ll jump again to the WWF with Enos as Blake Beverly of the Beverly Brothers, starting at Survivor Series 1991.

Team Nasty Boys vs. Team Rockers

Nasty Boys, Beverly Brothers

Rockers, Bushwhackers

This is right before the Rockers split and they’re already having issues. This is regular rules, which means individual eliminations and not one loss means both team members are gone. Butch and Knobbs get things going as Gorilla and Bobby talk about Hogan vs. Taker II. Butch hits a running knee lift and it’s off to Luke. The Whackers take over on the Nasties with a pair of double clotheslines.

The Beverly Brothers come in and do about as well as the Nasties with both Brothers taking a Battering Ram. The Rockers double dropkick the Nasties and the good guys have cleared the ring. It’s Shawn vs. Beau (the other is Blake) now as the announcers debate which guy on either team is the brains. A backbreaker puts Shawn down and it’s back to Knobbs. Luke comes in and avoids a splash in the corner but whacks his arms too much, allowing Knobbs to hit a middle rope clothesline for the elimination.

Off to Shawn vs. Sags with Jerry suplexing him down. Gorilla talks about how tonight will culminate at Tuesday in Texas. Again, screw you fans who bought this, as you just got part one. Some idiot fan stands up and poses for the camera so the shots keep cutting away a lot. The Rockers work on Sags’ arm before it’s off to Blake. Gorilla somehow can’t tell the Rockers apart, even though they pretty much look nothing alike.

A superkick puts Blake down but Beverly comes back with knees in the corner. Marty comes off the middle rope and shoves the referee for no apparent reason. It doesn’t go anywhere so I guess it was a mistake. Must be Colombian coke for Marty tonight. Off to Beau who doesn’t do much other than allow a tag to Butch who cleans house. The Beverlies double team him with a backdrop into a facejam for the pin and the elimination.

It’s Nasties/Beverlies vs. Rockers now with Marty coming in again. Marty monkey flips and ranas Beau down for two as Heenan and Gorilla trade statements of excitement. An enziguri puts Beau down again and it’s off to an armbar. It’s also off to Shawn who doesn’t do as well as you would expect against one of the Beverly Brothers. Off to Blake who jumps over Beau and lands on Shawn’s back in a move that the World’s Greatest Tag Team made famous.

Out of nowhere Shawn grabs a backslide on Beau for the pin to make it 3-1. Sags is in next as Gorilla thinks Marty should reach further for a tag. Even though the Rockers would split less than a month later, it wasn’t clear yet who would have gotten the super push. The Nasties head to the floor and Shawn clotheslines Sags off the apron and superkicks Knobbs down. Back in and Sags takes over again. Marty’s eyes are just gone and he looks awful.

Blake comes in again and gets kicked in the face, allowing for a falling tag to Marty. A big jumping back elbow takes Knobbs down and a snapmare gets two. Knobbs takes Jannetty down again and Heenan talks about Tuesday in Texas. Off to Sags with a powerslam and a belly to back suplex before it’s back to Knobbs. Marty gets his knees up to stop a middle rope splash and there’s the tag to Shawn. Everything breaks down and Marty swings Sags’ feet into Shawn’s face, resulting in Knobbs rolling Michaels up for the pin.

That leaves us with Marty vs. Blake and the Nasties which I don’t see going well for the coke head. Shawn freaks out on him before he leaves too to even further tease the tension. Marty starts with Knobbs and hits a middle rope bulldog but Jerry takes him down almost immediately and knocks him to the floor. A powerslam from Blake puts Marty down and the Nasties head to the floor. Jannetty dives on both of them and slams Blake’s face into the mat. Marty hooks a terrible looking small package on Sags but Knobbs rolls them over to give Jerry the final eliminating pin.

Rating: D. Man alive this was a long match. That’s the problem the rest of this show has created: there’s nothing else worth watching for the rest of the night and now they’re just filling in time to say that you’re getting a PPV that means something, when really you need to see the sequel to get the full thing. But hey, who cares about treating the fans right when you can get their money?

The team would be in action at Summerslam 1992 with a Tag Team Title shot.

Tag Titles: Natural Disasters vs. Beverly Brothers

The Brothers are managed by the Genius and are challenging here. Genius messes up his poem by getting some dates wrong but the fans are already cheering for the fat champions anyway. The challengers try to jump the big guys early on but the champions take their heads off with clotheslines. Both Brothers (Beau and Blake) are crushed in a fat man sandwich, leaving us with Typhoon to start against Blake.

Typhoon pounds away on the smaller man but Blake manages to lift him up for a slam. He can’t turn it over but it was a nice try at least. Everything breaks down for a few seconds until we’re back to more Disaster dominance. Quake accidentally splashes Typhoon in the corner and the ocean themed guy is down. The Brothers double team Typhoon with a splash but he launches Beau to the floor on the kickout.

Hang on a second: Shawn Michaels has left Wembley Stadium!

Back to the match with Blake hitting a middle rope headbutt for a delayed two. Beau holds Typhoon on the ropes so Blake can jump on his back in a move later used by Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin. The Brothers take turns pounding on Typhoon and draw Earthquake in, allowing them to double team Typhoon even more. A headbutt gets two for Blake and it’s off to a front facelock.

Typhoon finally makes a tag but the referee doesn’t see it, likely due to being bored by the match so far. Beau drops an ax handle onto Typhoon’s back but the big man FINALLY clotheslines both Beverlies down but stops to slam Beau instead of tagging out. Blake dropkicks his brother into a cross body on Typhoon for two and Quake has had enough. His save attempt is broken up by Genius’ metal scroll to Typhoon’s back as this match just keeps going. Quake breaks up he cover and gets the hot tag to clean house. A powerslam and the Earthquake are enough to retain the titles.

Rating: D. This just wouldn’t stop as the Brothers got WAY too much offense in here. The problem is the same as it was last year: there was no doubt as to who was walking out with the belts and that makes for a rather boring match. Also, the Beverlies are pretty average size guys so there’s only so much they can do against people like the Disasters.

Another elimination tag at Survivor Series 1992.

Nasty Boys/Natural Disasters vs. Beverly Brothers/Money Inc

Money Inc has the tag titles and are about to fight the Nasty Boys. This is one of those “when one guy gets pinned, both team members are out” deals, so it’s a max of three falls to end this match. We start with Typhoon vs. Blake Beverly and it’s a strut off. Typhoon starts throwing Blake around and puts him in an over the shoulder backbreaker so he can hand him off to Quake for a bearhug.

Beau tries to cheat to help his brother but it only results in a double splash from both Disasters in the corner. Off to Knobbs as the fans aren’t interested in this match at all. Knobbs runs Blake over with clotheslines and brings in Jerry who finally allows a tag to Beau. A pumphandle slam puts Beau down but he no sells it for some reason. Off to DiBiase who can’t suplex Sags, so Sags suplexes him.

Off to IRS who Jerry hiptosses down. The limited selling continues as IRS gets up and brings in Beau for a powerslam and it’s off to Blake again. Scratch that it’s Beau in now. Off to a chinlock from Blake as the Beverlies keep tagging in and out very fast. Jerry tries a quick sleeper but they wind up slamming heads to put both guys down. There’s the tag to Earqhquake and Blake is in trouble. Quake takes out all four of them and everything breaks down. For some reason Beau tries a crucifix on Typhoon and gets crushed for his efforts. The Earthquake from Earthquake eliminates the Beverlies and it’s 4-2.

DiBiase comes in to face Earthquake but gets beaten up by all four opponents in short order. Back to Quake who misses a splash in the corner and Money Inc double suplexes the fatter man down. IRS gets two off the suplex and picks him up to freak Bobby out again. Back to DiBiase as the fans are all over IRS. IRS chokes away on Quake some more and it’s back to DiBiase for some chops.

A middle rope double ax by Ted gets two so here’s IRS again. The champs do tag in and out quite well. Quake clotheslines IRS down and finally makes the hot tag to Typhoon. House is cleaned and a splash crushes IRS. DiBiase trips up Typhoon (how appropriate) and IRS gets the easy pin to tie it up, but Jerry runs in and rolls up IRS for the fast pin to win.

Rating: C. Not bad here but the ending kind of sucked. What was the point in having the Nasties beat Money Inc that fast when the majority of the match was about the Disasters vs. Money Inc? The Nasties were basically there to fill in a spot instead of being the focus of the match for their team. Odd indeed but it was entertaining enough.

One final WWF match as the first meal for the Steiner Brothers at Royal Rumble 1993.

Steiner Brothers vs. Beverly Brothers

For you ECW freaks, Bill Alfonzo is the referee. Scott and I think Blake start things off. This is the Steiners’ first major match and the fans seem to love them right off the bat. Scott immediately takes him to the mat with a top wristlock, causing Blake to freak out with a claim of tights being pulled. That sequence worked so well that they do it again. Heenan is very excited about the debut of Narcissist, which is Lex Luger as a guy obsessed with his muscles. In other words, Lex Luger debuts tonight.

After Blake stalls some more, here’s Beau to taunt the not legal Rick. There’s the tag to Rick who chases Beau around and hits Blake in the process. A powerslam puts Rick down and I don’t think Gorilla knows which Beverly is which. Since this is a Steiners match, it’s time for suplexes! Scott nearly kills Beau with a belly to belly and everything breaks down for a bit, allowing the Beverlies to take over on Scotty.

We get into a standard formula with Scott having his back worked on by both villains. Blake chokes with a tag rope in the corner for two. Heenan: “Gotta hook the tights.” Gorilla: “WHAT?” I love how shocked he sounds every time Heenan says something like that. Beau puts on a Boston Crab but Scott easily pushes out of it. Blake blocks a tag and let’s make sure that we’re LIVE still. What was WWF’s obsession with that?

Scott avoids an elbow drop but Blake breaks up the hot tag again. The crowd is silent when the Beverlies are on offense. Scott comes back with a butterfly powerbomb to put Blake down and Scott actually dives through the ropes and tags at the same time. Rick cleans house and there are Steiner Lines for both Beverlies. Scott pounds on Blake in the corner and counters a Doomsday Device with a victory roll for two. The Frankensteiner to Beau gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Pretty dull match here as the Steiners were clearly going to dominate the entire time. The Beverlies never got above lower midcard status and their biggest feud was against the Bushwhackers. What were you going to expect them to do against the freaking STEINER BROTHERS? Nothing here but a squash.

We’ll jump ahead a few years with Enos in WCW as the Mauler. Here he is on Nitro, May 26, 1996.

Steve Doll vs. The Mauler

And here it is. Why would this be on TV you ask? The same reason a guy named Steve Gatorwolf was on SNME once: to allow something else to happen. Mauler is Mike Enos and has Colonel Parker with him. Doll means nothing. Crowd is DEAD and the Mauler squashes him for awhile. They both go to the floor and Doll goes into the post. We take a break and come back and you can see him in the crowd.

Scott Hall comes over the railing and wants a mic. He says the famous line of you know who I am but you don’t know why I’m here. He calls out some of the big WCW names and has a challenge for Bischoff, Turner, Savage and anyone else that is here in WCW. “You want a war? You gonna get one.” The match of course just ends.

From September 23, 1996 on Nitro.

Mike Enos vs. Chris Jericho

We’re told that it’s Harlem Heat vs. Outsiders for the titles at Havoc. They start fast and Jericho gets slapped, as does Enos. Enos channels his inner JYD and gets on all fours to headbutt Jericho. Pretty basic match so far as we talk about Savage and the NWO. Larry says there was something else Savage said that Larry didn’t like. He doesn’t bother saying what that is, but I guess that’s an exercise left up to us.

They go to the floor and it’s all Enos. He loads up the steps and suplexes Jericho onto them, which isn’t a DQ I guess. Three minutes after he initially brought it up, Larry says it was the last hope for WCW line that he didn’t like. Off to a bearhug and then a powerslam for two. All Enos so far. Jericho gets put into a Boston Crab which isn’t ironic yet. Over the shoulder backbreaker now but Jericho counters into a sunset flip for two.

Missile dropkick puts Enos down and up to the corner we go. He sets for a super rana but Enos powerbombs him out of it (not as exciting as it sounds) for two. In a pretty cool ending that I don’t think I’ve seen before, Jericho counters a powerslam into something like a powerslam of his own (better than it sounds) for the pin. That looked pretty sweet actually.

Rating: B-. Much better match here than I was expecting. Enos was fine for what he was supposed to be here: a power guy acting as a foil for Jericho to look good against here. The ending was good too and it’s always fun to see a guy like Jericho getting one of his first big breaks on national TV. Fun match that did things simply but well.

Enos would mainly be a jobber to the stars, who tended to be from Canada. From Nitro on July 14, 1997.

Chris Benoit vs. Mike Enos

Last night Benoit FINALLY got rid of Kevin Sullivan so tonight he can go back to beating people up. Benoit stomps away on Enos in the corner but Mike comes back with knees in the corner. We hear about the return of Clash of the Champions, which would be the final edition of the show. Enos hits a fallaway slam off the middle rope and a neckbreaker gets two. A kneeling piledriver gets two more and it’s off to a bearhug. That gets broken up quickly so Enos powerslams him down for two. Not that it matters as Benoit Crossfaces him for the tap out.

Rating: C. This was a bit better than a squash as Enos got in a lot of offense and was in control for most of the time. Then again Benoit was supposed to be banged up because of the match last night and he won anyway so it’s not a big problem or anything like that. Decent little match here.

We’ll jump ahead to the blue show with Thunder, February 19, 1998.

Outsiders vs. Mike Enos/Wayne Bloom

WCW wins the survey in a landslide. Nash says Giant needs to be at the PPV and does a shout out to Syxx about being some rubber thing. Hall pounds on Enos to start and hits a quick chokeslam to work in his Giant pose. Enos comes back with a powerslam for two and it’s off to Bloom but Nash gets in a cheap shot to take over. Nash comes in and destroys Wayne, decks the referee and powerbombs Bloom for a $50,000 fine and a DQ loss.

Here’s another singles match on Thunder, August 26, 1998.

Mike Enos vs. Bull Pain

Bull Pain has been kicking around the indies and smaller promotions for years now. Enos starts fast and pounds away before hitting a nice side slam. Lots of walking around and posing by Enos. Pain comes back with some right hands and kicks to the ribs but that’s about it for him. A middle rope fall away slam is enough to finish Pain and gets Enos the only pop of his WCW career.

Rating: D. The fall away slam was good but we’re seriously having Mike Enos squashes now? This is how far Thunder has fallen? Bull Pain is a good name for someone but when you get a jobber’s entrance to face Mike Enos, it might be time to look for a new line of work. Nothing to see here.

Enos actually had a PPV match at Souled Out 1999.

Mike Enos vs. Chris Benoit

After main eventing Thunder for two weeks in a row, this is the best Benoit can get? Feeling out process to start with Benoit taking him up against the ropes and chopping away before getting taken down by a running clothesline. The muscular Enos hammers away but gets chopped and clotheslined by the Canadian to take over. Enos gets whipped down into the corner and dragon screw leg whipped for good measure.

More chops have Enos reeling but he counters the Crossface into a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for a very delayed two. A powerslam gets a much more timely two and we hit the bearhug on Benoit. Off to the chinlock on Benoit which is quickly switched over to another bearhug. Benoit elbows out of it but gets kneed in the ribs to put him down again. Benoit counters a suplex into a cross body for two. The Rolling Germans have Mike in trouble and there’s the Swan Dive but Benoit can’t cover. Back up and Benoit slaps on the Crossface for the submission.

Rating: C. The match was fine but I’m not sure this should have opened a PPV. Benoit looked good, though it’s against Mike Enos so how much does it really mean? This was a good sign that WCW didn’t know what to do with Benoit at the moment, but at least he got a nice win.

We’ll wrap it up on Thunder, February 11, 1999.

Tag Team Title Tournament: Mike Enos/Bobby Duncum Jr. vs. Faces of Fear

The losers are eliminated. Meng and Enos get things going and they actually do some technical stuff at first. Mike takes him into the corner but offers a clean break so they can stare at each other. Meng does the same and this has the makings of a long match. They trade shots to the ribs until Meng nails him with a clothesline. Enos takes him down with an armdrag and it’s off to Duncum who gets wristlocked. Barbarian comes in as this match isn’t exactly thrilling the fans. Bobby hits a bad dropkick to send Barbarian to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Meng getting choked in the corner to keep Enos in control. A piledriver has almost no effect on Meng and it’s off to Barbarian who gets powerslammed for two. Meng comes back in with a piledriver of his own for two on Bobby. A double diving headbutt gets the same before Barbarian drops an elbow on Duncum’s back. We hit the chinlock before Meng comes in to choke.

The match just keeps going as Meng bites Bobby’s nose. Barbarian’s side slam gets two and Meng, I’m assuming out of boredom, dances before kicking Duncum in the head. A powerslam gets another near fall on Bobby….and Barbarian turns on Meng with some kicks to the head to give Duncum the pin.

Rating: D-. This tournament is officially the work of the devil. There is no other possible explanation for making me watch these teams fight three times in a month, including this which went nearly fifteen minutes. I have no idea who thinks Mike Enos and Bobby Duncum Jr. should be given this much TV time but they should be dragged out into the street and shot.

Mike Enos is a good choice to put out there for a power opponent and not much more. That being said, there’s always room for a guy like him with a decent look and enough success and experience to to make a good opponent. Sometimes you just need a guy with muscles that you can beat up and Enos fit that mold well. He was better than people remember him being and a good tag wrestler, meaning he deserves a bit more credit than he gets.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Thunder
Date: June 24, 1999
Location: Cajundome, Lafayette, Louisiana
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Larry Zbyszko

Bash at the Beach seems miles away at this point as I don’t think anything has been announced save for the main event tag match. Other than that I’m sure we’ll get something in the old vs. new story, presumably with Bagwell getting a big match and in theory a major win over an older guy. Yeah I don’t see it happening either. Let’s get to it.

The announcers do their opening stuff and Tenay plugs the PPV.

Here’s the birthday party and subsequent caking between the rappers and the cowboys from Monday.

Speaking of the cowboys, here they are to perform Rap Is Crap live. I think we’ve hit our high point.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Psychosis

The fans are entirely behind Eddie here. Eddie mocks taking the LWO shirt off to Psychosis before running into a clothesline. A hurricanrana out of the corner drops Eddie again and Psychosis crotches him on the top for good measure. Psychosis kicks Guerrero to the floor and follows him out with a big dive. The announcers are already ignoring this to talk about the Hummer driver.

Back in and Eddie hurricanranas Psychosis down and it’s already back to the floor. Psychosis goes into the steps and gets crushed between the steps and post for a dropkick. The slingshot hilo has Psychosis in even more trouble and Eddie hooks an abdominal stretch as we take a break. Back with Guerrero holding a leg lock but being thrown into the air for a big crash a few seconds later.

That’s fine with Eddie as he goes right back to the leg to take over. He bridges back on the leg in a painful looking hold before taking it back outside, only to be sent into the barricade. They head inside again with Eddie nailing a nice leg lariat. Eddie dives into an atomic drop and gets kicked off the apron and to the floor. A slingshot moonsault drops Guerrero again and it’s back into the ring. Eddie’s tornado DDT is countered and a top rope hurricanrana gets two. Psychosis misses a high cross body though and the Frog Splash is enough for the pin.

Rating: B. This is the kind of stuff that made WCW fans stick around as long as they did. Yeah there’s a bunch of nonsense going on and the old guys won’t just go away and let the younger generation take over, but every so often you get a ten to fifteen minute match like this that just takes off and entertains the heck out of you. Really good stuff here and more proof that Eddie was awesome.

Ric Flair and company convince Evan Karagias to lay down for David tonight to make David 6-0, because he’s going to break Goldberg’s record.

Clip from Monday of Nash and Sting chasing off Savage and Sid, followed by Nash implying Sting was driving the Hummer.

Clip from Monday of Luger saving Sting from Sid’s powerbomb to end the show. Again, where did Nash go to?

Actually he’s right here with something to say. He talks about being an Outsider a few years ago and here he is the World Champion and still an outsider. WCW doesn’t want him to have the title and they’re throwing everyone they can at him. First he beat Savage so Randy brought in Sid. Now those two have brought in Sting, who Nash will tag with even though he doesn’t trust him. This actually hasn’t bad.

Fit Finlay/Dave Taylor vs. Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn

For some reason Benoit and Saturn come out to Malenko’s music. Benoit and Taylor get things going with Taylor backing him into the corner but stopping to stare at the Canadian. Taylor takes him down to the mat with a test of strength but Benoit bridges off the mat. Dave can’t even break the bridge by jumping onto Benoit in an always cool looking display of strength.

Benoit comes back with some dropkicks to send Taylor outside and it’s off to Finlay and Saturn. The t-bone suplex doesn’t quite work for Saturn as he falls backwards while throwing Finlay but everything breaks down to send the Europeans out to the floor. Saturn keeps up the mistakes by superkicking Finlay in the ribs to knock him into a German suplex. Fit easily sends Benoit into the corner though as we take a break.

Back with Finlay putting Benoit in a half crab before Taylor comes in to grab the other leg for good measure. A belly to back gets two for Finlay and it’s back to Dave as the fans chant for Benoit. The heels take turns on Benoit with Finlay talking his usual trash. An Earthquake splash keeps Benoit in trouble but Saturn chases an interfering Taylor away.

Benoit slips off Finlay’s shoulders and nails Taylor, allowing for the hot tag to Saturn. Perry slips out of a tilt-a-whirl slam and messes up the landing again. What is with him tonight? Finlay plants him with the rolling fireman’s carry but Saturn pops up with the Death Valley Driver on Taylor. Not that it matters as Benoit hits the Swan Dive on Dave for the pin.

Rating: C+. Another good match here as the wrestling is on fire tonight. Taylor was an underused guy who was great at making others look great. Finlay was his usual self here and that’s exactly the kind of guys you want in there with a tag team like Benoit and Saturn when they’re in the middle of a solid push. What was with all of Saturn’s botches though? He never does that.

Steve Regal returns to give the losers a pep talk.

Clip of the ending to the old vs. new tag match from Monday.

Here are Flair and Asya for a chat with Gene. Flair has some business to take care of by making Benoit/Saturn vs. Page/Kanyon for the Tag Team Titles at Bash at the Beach. As for tonight, we’re going to stomp out some problems so it’s Bagwell/Malenko vs. Savage/Sid. That leaves him with Nash, but he’s saving a surprise for Monday in Chicago. Flair keeps shouting TURN ON THE POWER to end this.

Curt Hennig vs. Lenny Lane

Lane quickly tries to run but Duncum throws him back in. Lenny actually scores with a slam and mocks the whole cowboy thing. As you would expect, Hennig pops up and throws Lenny into the corner for some hard chops. We get the old standards from Hennig including the neck snap and dropkick before a big chop drops Lane again. Hennig stomps on the ribs….and the match is stopped? Ah Lodi threw in the towel to save his buddy. Total squash.

Lodi gets a Hennigplex for his efforts.

Here are Savage, Sid and the chicks with something to say. Randy insists that none of the girls were driving the Hummer, which should be obvious given that they were outside the limo when it was crushed. Savage thinks it might have been Hall or even Sting. Sid babbles about huting Nash and Sting and that’s about it.

Evan Karagias vs. David Flair

Now remember, Evan is supposed to be tanking. They trade armbars on the mat to start until Evan scores with an armdrag. A quick suplex drops David again but Anderson tells him to start throwing it. Evan responds by powerslamming David, only to have Ric get up on the apron for a distraction. Now Asya offers a distraction so Anderson can slip David the taser to knock Evan out. The Figure Four makes David I think 6-0.

Hugh Morrus vs. Van Hammer

Hardcore match. Morrus hammers away with trashcan lids to start before using the trashcan itself. A big slam onto the can has Hammer in even more trouble so Hugh goes up, only to slip off and run into a lid shot from Hammer, drawing a Flair Flop. Hammer puts on his jacket, nails a lariat, and puts the jacket on the turnbuckle. We get a ladder set up in the corner but Hugh sends Hammer into it for a big crash.

A trashcan shot to the head busts Hammer open so it’s time for a wide angle. Hugh and Hart set up a table on the floor so Morrus can load up No Laughing Matter….but Flair comes out and stops the match. He says there will be no more hardcore matches (SWEET) and gets in an argument with Morrus, allowing Hammer to put him through the table and walk off.

Rating: D. Uh…yeah. Between Morrus literally running into a shot from a trashcan lid to the ending, I’m not sure what they were going for with something like this. These guys are both wandering around with nothing to do and now they’re taking away the only thing they have going on. At least it’s nothing that needs to be sticking around so it’s hard to complain.

Randy Savage/Sid Vicious vs. Buff Bagwell/Dean Malenko

I don’t see this ending well. Savage and Bagwell get things going with Buff already posing. We keep up the stalling even longer until they lock up against the ropes. Time for more posing though as we’re somehow almost two minutes into the match. A dropkick puts Randy down and it’s off to Malenko. We get an actually nice amateur sequence but it’s off to Sid to put Malenko in trouble. Malenko slides through the ropes and brings in Buff for some double teaming but Savage knees Buff in the back. A chokeslam plants Bagwell and a legdrop gets two. The fans want Goldberg but get Savage instead.

Randy suckers Dean in so the villains can double team. Sid hammers away in the corner but Madusa’s interference goes bad with Savage nailing her by mistake. The hot tag brings in Dean with a cross body getting two on Savage. Everything breaks down and Miss Madness sunset flips Dean for no apparent reason. Dean puts her in the Cloverleaf so Savage can nail him from behind. Sid plants Dean with a powerbomb and Savage nails Nick Patrick for the DQ.

Rating: D+. The match had its moments but you were just waiting for the old guys to destroy the younger generation. I know you don’t want Sid or Savage to take a fall here but did the have to destroy these two? Of course they did because this is WCW with two guys that could move up the card.

Post match Savage and Sid destroy Mickie Jay for coming out to try and keep things in line. Savage says the powerbomb is for Nash and rants a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The first two matches were really solid but things went downhill in a hurry after that. As usual, the wrestlers can carry the show but the “stories” drag it down a cliff. That being said, the opening matches made this one of the best episodes in a good while, but I gave up hope for this company a long time ago.

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Today we’re looking at the greatest wrestler on God’s green Earth: Harley Race.

Race started in 1960 but we’ll pick things up with him as NWA World Champion and wrestling at MSG for NWA member the World Wide Wrestling Federation on December 19, 1977.

NWA World Title: Harley Race vs. Rick Martel

Martel is about 21 here and the announcers are Australian. This has to be the forerunner to OCW. Crowd is INSANE here and we keep hearing the announcer say World Championship Wrestling which is weird as all goodness. The turnbuckles are HUGE. This is just odd to see but rather fun. A hiptoss and backdrop into an arm drag and armbar warrants a slow motion replay in the middle of the match.

This announcer is really good. No clue who he is but he’s quite engaging. Race was fairly awesome at this point as he was still young at 34. Martel gets out of a hammerlock to a nice pop. He’s quite popular here. I wonder if he has an enormous schwanzstück (rep to whoever gets this reference first).

Race gets a nice gutwrench suplex to take over again but Martel starts the comeback. The punches are let loose but Martel misses a cross body off the middle rope and Race hits a British Bulldogesque delayed suplex to get the pin. It was a very different time back then and winning with a move like that was perfectly acceptable at this point.

Rating: B-. Very fun little match here as Martel did his thing but Race just outsmarted him to get the pin. Race in his prime is a sight to behold as he really is as good as he’s made up to be. I’m not a big Martel guy but this was a good match and the crowd being very hot helped a lot. Who would have expected that from Australia?

From two years later in the same building on December 17, 1979.

NWA World Title: Harley Race vs. Dusty Rhodes

Why am I not thrilled to see this? Race is champion here. Rhodes is listed as 261 pounds. That’s just hilarious. Race had the title and then Dusty beat him for it and vice versa, leading to the rubber match here. Dusty hits his elbow drop for two because it’s not the end of the match and since IT’S AN ELBOW DROP it doesn’t work here. This was back in the final days of the WWF being in the NWA so these wouldn’t happen much more often.

This is fairly basic and Vince keeps trying to tell us how great Rhodes is in the ring. On the mic yes but in the ring not so much. They fight over a suplex and this is definitely a different style than the rest of the show has been as it’s a more NWA style of slow building. Race is bleeding from the head. Race gets launched to the floor as this thankfully picks up something resembling steam.

Dusty hits a piledriver but the feet are on the ropes again. Race comes back with his standard stuff as this is pretty clearly coming to a close. Dusty makes his comeback which lasts about 8 seconds. Race drops a bunch of knees and Dusty is busted open too. His is a lot worse than Race’s though. Dusty makes his real comeback but the referee stops it because of his cut for a CHEAP finish. LOUD bull chant afterwards.

Rating: C. This was boring as all goodness for the most part but it picked up a lot near the end. The finish was clearly going to be screwy but I can live with that as this was just a token title defense. Also that means Race wins here instead of a draw or a no contest. Nothing great at all here but pretty watchable.

Off to Texas Stadium at some point in 1982.

Kerry Von Erich vs. Harley Race

The winner gets a title shot against Ric Flair. Kerry uses his speed to start and hits a nice dropkick but gets small packaged for two. Off to a headlock on the veteran but Race slams him down and tries a headbutt, only to have Kerry just hold up his hands to block it. The Claw goes on and Race is suddenly screaming but he’s able to send Von Erich to the floor. Kerry slams him down on the concrete though and calmly waits in the ring.

Back in and Race easily takes him down with a chinlock but Kerry quickly fights back up and nails a discus punch. The referee goes down in a rare sight at this point, meaning Race’s piledriver only gets two. They fight to the floor again with Race in full control and ramming him into various metal objects. Some knees to the head have Kerry in even more trouble but he’s able to post Harley for a breather. Back in again and Kerry hammers away before putting on a sleeper.

Race is bleeding from the eye and sends Von Erich into the buckle to escape. A nice suplex puts Kerry down but Harley can’t follow up. Another headbutt misses and Kerry gets two before slamming Harley off the top. They collide again and fall out to the floor for a slugout with Kerry taking over. Back in and Race goes up top for a cross body but Kerry rolls through for the big upset.

Rating: C+. This was the stadium match style played very well and it worked like it was supposed to. For a show in this big of an area, you have to do stuff that is going to get noticed very easily. Almost everything here was a big move that could be seen from a long way off and the match worked well. Also notice that Race, nearing the end of his time on top, is putting young stars over clean. That’s what aging veterans are supposed to do.

Race’s most famous feud was against Ric Flair in the early 80s. Race had defeated Flair for the title and then offered a bounty for anyone that could take Flair out. Dick Slater and Bob Orton attacked Flair and claimed the bounty, but Ric came back with a ball bat, swearing revenge. Here’s his chance at the first Starrcade in 1983.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Harley Race

The entrances take a LONG time, especially when you compare them to the other intros tonight. Wait has anyone else had an intro tonight? I don’t think they have actually. Flair has a long light sequence with his legendary music (the song playing in the gorilla sequence from 2001: A Space Odyssey) playing in the background. Former world champion Gene Kiniski is guest referee for no apparent reason and this is inside a steel cage. Race is a seven time and reigning champion and Flair is a two time champion so these are both seasoned veterans.

They talk trash to each other to start before Flair takes him down with a headlock takeover. Race sends him into the ropes for a knee to the ribs but Kiniski pulls them apart. Ric snapmares him down into a chinlock which transitions into a headlock. Race fights up and hits a high knee, only to have a falling headbutt hit the canvas. Flair goes back to the headlock and cranks away on it on the mat but has to shift over into a front facelock.

Race escapes but misses a big elbow drop, only to fall on Flair for two during a slam attempt. Race drops a knee on the forehead and it’s Flair in trouble this time. Kiniski pulls Race off again so Harley opts to hit Ric in the ear instead. A piledriver puts Flair down but Race drops an elbow before covering. Race stays on the neck which is logical given the piledriver that put Flair out earlier in the year. The champion drives some knee into the back of the neck before sending Flair head first into the cage. That’s the first time it’s been used and we’re about ten minutes into the match.

We go to that overhead camera shot again as Race hits what looks like a shoulder breaker for two. A falling headbutt has Flair in trouble again as does being slammed face first into the cage. Another shot into the steel has Flair in trouble and Race is in full control. The referee pulls Race off Flair for the third time but this time he yells at Flair as well. Ric is busted open now.

Flair tries a headbutt get gets raked in the eyes to bring him down again. Now Ric blocks a ram into the cage and sends the champion in to get his first advantage in a long time. A knee to Race’s head gets two and Harley is busted open as well. Flair hits a piledriver of his own but Race’s afro protects him, meaning Flair only gets two. There’s a butterfly suplex for two for Flair and he sends Race head first into the cage again.

Race is in trouble but comes back with a headbutt which looked very low and Flair is in trouble as a result. Kiniski interferes AGAIN before Race throws Flair into the cage. Flair loads up a punch but Gene pulls the arm back because that’s illegal. IN A CAGE MATCH. Ric gets ticked off and pounds away on the champion but Kiniski breaks up the strut. Flair puts on the Figure Four but Race turns it over, which is apparently a big deal at this time.

Race headbutts out of the corner but Flair falls on top during a suplex attempt. The champion slams him down and drops a middle rope headbutt but stuns himself in the process. A suplex gets two more for Race and there is blood EVERYWHERE. Race pounds away and Kiniski has a problem with that too. Harley shrugs off some Flair punches and sends him into the cage before choking away with his boot.

Flair counters a suplex into one of his own as the back and forth control continues. A big elbow drop misses Race and both guys are down. Flair has been in such a fight that he’s gone from covered in blood to clean again to bloody again. Race accidentally knocks the referee down and in a famous but odd ending, Flair goes up top and hits a cross body, sending Race falling over the kneeling Kiniski for the pin and the title.

Rating: A. This is the definition of an old school fight. While it was pretty clear that Flair was going to win, it wasn’t a complete lock which made the match that much more interesting. The only slight flaw is the ending as the Kiniski stuff really wasn’t needed and the build wasn’t all that strong. Still though, this was a bloody and violent match between two of the best ever. Great stuff.

Off to the AWA with Race’s career winding down. From SuperClash 1985.

Asian Six Man Tag Titles: Giant Baba/Tsuruta/Genichiro Tenryu vs. Harley Race/Bill Irwin/Scott Irwin

I can find no source claiming that these titles existed either before or after this show. The three Japanese guys are the defending champions but they have no belts. Baba has freaky skinny arms. Scott vs. Tenryu to start. They talk about the two former world champions here: Race and Tsuruta. That’s very interesting that they’re ignoring Baba being a three time NWA World Champion.

Ok so Scott is in the shirt. Got it. Race comes in to fight Tenryu and never mind as it’s Jumbo. Race is his usual old school heel self and it’s off to Bill. Bill makes a tag as Tsuruta counters a top wristlock. Off to Race vs. Baba as this match is really awkward. There’s no story here so there’s no heat to it. They tag in and out a lot and technically it’s ok, but it’s more like a collection of moves than a coherent match.

Bill gets a boot in and the fans are getting behind the heels. See what I mean about it not making a lot of sense? Tenryu is going to be playing Ricky Morton it seems. Piledriver gets two for Race. The Irwins hit a double back elbow for the same. Tenryu gets a boot up and it’s hot tag to Jumbo. Everything breaks down and Baba LAUNCHES Bill into the corner and to the floor. Back to Tenryu who gets a slam for two. Everything breaks down again and Baba hits a big boot on Bill for the pin to retain.

Rating: D. This show has been pretty meh so far and this match hasn’t helped anything. The fake champions defended their fake titles against guys they have no issue with right? On top of that like I said, there’s no issue here so the match isn’t anything interesting either. This felt off the whole time and it really brought it down. That and the heels being cheered because no one knew most of the Japanese guys.

Race got a shot at a former AWA World Champion at WrestleRock 1986.

Harley Race vs. Rick Martel

This is billed as former champion vs. former champion, which sounds SO exciting doesn’t it? Race grabs a headlock to start as is his custom but Martel whips him in and it’s time for an armbar. This is so common in this company I can’t believe it. That doesn’t last long as Race whips him in and RACE LEAPFROGS MARTEL. And I thought I had seen everything. Martel doesn’t know what to do so naturally, it’s an armdrag into an armbar.

Race takes him down again as neither guy can get a real advantage here. Headbutt sets up a chinlock which isn’t something the people seem all that interested in seeing at this point. Yep there are the boring chants. Martel gets up and there’s armbar #3 five minutes into the match. Race’s counter this time? Slam his head into Martel’s. Well you can’t say he’s not using his head. I’ll give you a minute to roll your eyes at how lame that joke was.

Powerslam gets two for Race but Martel escapes a suplex and throws on a sleeper. Does this guy know ANYTHING besides rest holds? Race rams him into the buckle and hits a neckbreaker to put Rick down. Harley goes up (not as bizarre as you would expect) but gets slammed off. Well his last major feud was with Flair so that probably has something to do with it. They slug it out a bit which should result in pain bruises and agony for Martel but instead he grabs a headlock. Martel hits a backbreaker and slingshot splash for two, which Trongard says Martel debuted five years ago in 1983. Check the date on the show.

Anyway after that warping of time and space, Race headbutts and piledrives him for two. Elbow drop gets two and it’s off to the chinlock. Race sends him into the corner and Martel tries a cross body out of the corner, but Race just casually steps to the side, ala Samoa Joe. After a brief slugout, Martel whips Race into the corner and out to the floor, but it’s not a DQ due to whatever alteration they want to make this time.

Suplex gets two for Rick back in. Shoulderbreaker and neckbreaker get two for Race. They collide and Race is knocked to the floor. He always was great at taking that backwards fall. Back in another piledriver is countered into a gutwrench suplex for two by Martel. Now Rick goes after the knee for some reason. After some knees to the leg it’s off to a leg hold but Race uses his head (as always) to escape. Race pounds on him in the corner but has his suplex countered. A splash by Martel eats knees and they go to the floor off a slam attempt. They brawl even more and it’s a double countout, two minutes before the time limit.

Rating: C+. Pretty decent match here but again the problem is that there’s no story to this. That being said, they were getting close to overcoming that with some solid back and forth stuff. At the end of the day, it’s Harley Race going 18 minutes so the match by default has to be pretty good. Martel was a WAY bigger deal in the AWA than in the WWF.

Somewhere around this time, Race invested in the Kansas City territory and lost a fortune due to national expansion. He had to take a job in the WWF and we’ll pick things up on June 14, 1986.

Harley Race vs. Lanny Poffo

Race is the “newcomer” here, although they openly say he’s wrestled for twenty years. Clipped to Poffo taking something like a brainbuster on the floor. The fans are quiet but this is the old Race, as in the old school style of him. Top rope headbutt (which Race is credited with inventing) puts Poffo down and a regular one puts him on the floor.

Poffo starts his comeback and hits a flying headscissors to bring Race over the top and back in. Race gets him in a fireman’s carry and drops him throat first across the top rope to break up the comeback though. Fisherman’s suplex ends this. Not enough to grade but Race was his usual great self, even though the match was dull.

Off to the Big Event against another legend.

Harley Race vs. Pedro Morales

They’re both old and they’re both fat. They’re also rather slow and it’s not interesting at all anymore. The main event is next so this is likely Hogan’s effort to make people forget the previous good match so that he looks good next. He did it to the whole company in about 8 years with WCW. The referees have more or less sucked all night as they never count fast enough. Race gets a double leg trip and uses the ropes for the easy pin.

Rating: N/A. This was just a filler to put some space between the two matches that were good and nothing more.

Here’s a match that had a hand in starting a series. A Survivor Series if you will. From November 24, 1986.

Randy Savage/Harley Race/Adrian Adonis vs. Roddy Piper/Junkyard Dog/Ricky Steamboat

This is elimination rules and it was a brand new idea at the time. They were popular enough that a PPV version was made later in the year. For some reason, Slick is on commentary. These are all matches at Wrestlemania and the last appearance in MSG for Piper so gee, I wonder who will win here. Savage runs and hides from Steamboat but they wind up starting.

Savage tries to roll away and it’s Race in now with no tag. Off to JYD and it’s rolling headbutts time. They look at each other for awhile as Steamboat plays cheerleader. Belly to belly puts JYD down and it’s off to Savage again. He loads up the elbow but stops to yell at Steamboat. Piper shoves Randy into the now legal Steamboat. My goodness I’d love to see Savage and Piper have a feud. Not the kind they had in WCW either.

Off to Adonis and he runs from Piper. Everything breaks down and all six are in there. A double suplex puts Roddy down and Adrian hooks the sleeper on him. That doesn’t last and Piper hooks a sleeper which is broken up just as quickly. JYD is waiting on an opponent now. I know it sounds like I’m skipping a lot but they’re moving in and out of there so fast that it’s almost impossible to keep up with.

Adonis works on the Dog but hits him in the head because heels are stupid. Everyone goes to the floor and Roddy hits Adrian with a chair. Back to some form of sanity as Piper hits a belly to back suplex on Race but Savage breaks up the cover. This has been incredibly fast paced. And there’s a bell. Uh……why? Adonis and JYD were both counted out because they were legal. Ok then.

Piper vs. Race now and make that Piper vs. Savage. Piper blocks a suplex as Gorilla and Slick argue. Savage misses a shot into the ropes but Race prevents the tag. And never mind as he makes it just a second later. Steamboat speeds things up on Race as Slick yells about karate. Everyone gets in again and my goodness is there some talent in there. There isn’t a bad combination at all out there.

Steamboat rolls up Race but Savage reverses it and somehow it gets the pin, after about 15 seconds of Steamboat being down. I don’t think so but whatever. Ok so it’s Piper vs. Race/Savage. Piper of course is all cool with going straight for Race and they go to the floor. Savage tries to hit him with a chair but they get back in and somehow Savage is now legal. Top rope double axe gets two. Powerslam gets two for Race. Piper grabs a gutwrench suplex but Savage makes the save.

Savage goes up but the double axe hits Race, allowing Piper to steal a pin and it’s 1-1. Now THIS should be awesome. And this is how Piper goes out of MSG? This works I’d think. Race won’t leave so Piper throws Savage into him and then bulldogs Randy down. Savage tries to bail but suckers Piper in and gets the first punch in. That weird clothesline Savage does takes Roddy down for two.

They start choking away at each other and this is so awesome. Piper actually shows off his strength and holds Savage up in a choke. They collide and Savage is knocked to the floor. Piper gets up but then lays down and plays possum. Savage goes up for the elbow but Piper moves and a small package ends the Macho Man. TOTALLY AWESOME and vintage Piper.

Rating: A. I had a blast with this. The talent levels out there were completely insane and they gave us twenty minutes of a great match. These matches could work so well if they were done right and this one was, especially when they have the time to put it together. The eliminations were a bit off, but this was probably the first one ever. Great match though and an absolute blast.

Against a bigger name on February 23, 1987.

Paul Orndorff/Harley Race vs. Hulk Hogan/Roddy Piper

These two teaming up together always feels wrong. Big brawl to start until Hogan and Piper clear the ring. The heels come back in so Hogan picks up Piper and uses his feet as a battering ram. Piper vs. Race officially gets us started. Off to Hulk and the place goes manic. They work on Race’s arm and it’s back to Piper for another big pop. Ok make it Hogan http://improvehearingnaturally.com again. You know they work well together for mortal enemies.

They do look at each other with a bit of disdain and a lack of trust but if they didn’t it would be awful. Race headbutts his way out of trouble but still can’t bring Paul in. Back to Hulk and the arm work continues. The place is about to come unglued. Race finally gets in a belly to belly and knee drop to take over. Here’s Orndorff off the top and Piper is in trouble now.

The heels take turns on Piper and it’s off to a chinlock. This place is going to explode when Hogan gets the tag. Suplex keeps Roddy down and it’s off to Paul again. Race hammers away on Piper some more and headbutts him. Roddy stands still and looks like he’s about to fall down when he dives forward for the tag. That looked great. Race looks scared to death and Hogan pounds away. House is cleaned and he drops the leg but Orndorff saves. Heenan gets drilled and heel miscommunication lets Piper pin Race which counts for some reason.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where it’s about the atmosphere instead of the match itself. Piper and Hogan teaming together is still a weird sight and I’m not sure how well I like it. Still though, fun little match that blew the roof off MSG (that thing has to be in disrepair given how often it happens) which is the entire idea.

Here’s Race’s most famous WWF match. From Wrestlemania III.

Harley Race vs. Junkyard Dog

The loser has to bow. Uecker is apparently in love with Moolah and bails out of the booth. Race comes out to either Lawler’s music or the song Lawler’s music was remixed from. Dog says that he wants to take over the spot on the throne. Oh and I forgot to mention the ring carts which only appeared here and at Mania 6. Those things were AWESOME. Dog blocks some punches to start and pounds away but Race trips up JYD to give Race control.

Dog comes right back with a headbutt to send Race to the floor before pulling him right back in. Race gets knocked to the floor again and is in big trouble. Back in and Race tries a headbutt and knocks himself silly. A Flair Flip in the corner sends Race to the floor AGAIN but it still doesn’t last long. Back inside Dog hits some headbutts but has to stop to chase off Heenan, allowing Race to hit a belly to belly for the pin.

Rating: D. This wasn’t that good primarily due to time. The majority of the match was spent with Race on the floor which isn’t what you expect from him. Dog was all about personality and crowd response as most of his offense was a bunch of headbutts. Not much to see here but the crowd was into it.

Race was in the opening match from the first Survivor Series in 1987.

Team Honky Tonk Man vs. Team Randy Savage

Honky Tonk Man, Harley Race, Ron Bass, Danny Davis, Hercules

Randy Savage, Jim Duggan, Ricky Steamboat, Jake Roberts, Brutus Beefcake

Honky doesn’t have Cool Cocky bad as his theme music yet which is a shame. It’s amazing how great the music got in the late 80s. After the heel entrances, Team Savage says they’re here to settle scores. This was a different time as almost all of the faces were friends by default as were the heels just because they were faces and heels. The feuds going into this are Honky vs. Savage and Race vs. Duggan. Other than that the guys are just random midcarders who are faces or heels on a team, which is a pretty cool idea.

The place erupts for Savage’s entrance. Even Jesse couldn’t deny how great Randy was and was a huge fan in his own right. It was clear they had to do something with him soon, and they certainly did soon enough. In the answer to a trivia question, it’s Beefcake vs. Hercules starting the first Survivor Series match ever. Beefcake struts a bit and not much goes on for the first 20 seconds or so.

Hercules (guess what he’s known for) runs Beefcake over but walks into Barber’s sleeper but he falls into his corner to tag in Davis, one of the lowest lever guys you’ll ever find who somehow wasn’t a jobber. He’s a wrestling referee. Seriously, that’s the extent of his gimmick. He’s a referee who cheated a lot and got fired. Savage and Steamboat (who are apparently fine after wanting to kill each other about eight months ago) take turns on Davis but Steamboat misses a charge and it’s off to Race, the current King of the WWF.

Steamboat chops Race in the head and man alive how amazing would those two be able to be in a long old school program? Steamboat skins the cat (I’ve asked this many times, but is that really the best name they could come up with for that? I mean, skinning a cat?) and sends Race to the floor before bringing in Duggan to pound away on Race, knocking him to the floor. Hacksaw heads out with him and they brawl to a double countout, making it 4-4.

Bass (a standard old school cowboy) comes in to face Roberts but it’s quickly off to Savage. A knee sends Bass into the corner and Savage is starting to roll very fast. Savage immediately goes after Honky due to the really bad blood between the two of them and it’s lets Bass get in a shot. Off to the IC Champion (Honky) who gets in some cheap shots but like any good heel, he tags out when Savage starts coming back.

Bass comes in again but a blind tag brings in Barber (Beefcake for you younguns) who hits a high knee for the elimination. Hercules comes in and the bad guys start working over Beefcake’s arm. Off to Honky with an armbar and then right back to Herc. Wisely they’re keeping that schmuck Danny Davis out of there. I guess he’s there because he works for Jimmy Hart but other than that there’s no logical reason for him to be there.

Beefcake tries to punch his way out of trouble but Honky stays on the arm. To say Honky wasn’t much on offense is an understatement as he barely looks to be cranking on the hold at all. Beefcake fights out of the hold but won’t tag because he’s kind of dumb. Davis adds the only thing he’s going to add the whole match and knees Beefcake in the back so that Honky can hit the Shake Rattle and Roll (swinging neckbreaker) for the pin on Beefcake to tie us up at three.

Off to Savage vs. Hercules with the power guy taking over. Davis comes in and things suddenly go downhill for Honky’s team. Yeah, a referee beating on Randy Savage doesn’t work. Who would have guessed? Honky comes in and gets elbowed in the head which lets Savage tag in Jake to pound away. The comeback doesn’t last long though as Jake charges into a boot in the corner and it’s off to Herc. That goes nowhere so here’s Davis and since his offense sucks (BECAUSE HE’S A REFEREE) Jake shrugs it all off and DDTs him to death, making it 3-2 (Savage/Steamboat/Roberts vs. Hercules/Honky).

Herc comes in and takes Jake down and Savage tries to come in for a save, which just allows the heels to double team Jake. Savage isn’t thinking here because of his anger, almost like…..a savage. Oh you’re very clever WWF. Honky hooks a chinlock and Hercules comes in to do the same. Jake hits a jawbreaker to escape and there’s the hot tag to Steamboat who cleans house with chops.

A top rope chop has Herc reeling and it’s off to Savage for the elbow. It’s just Honky left and Savage explodes on him, only to miss another charge (third one for Savage’s team) and let Honky get in some offense. That lasts all of six seconds as the beating continues. Jake comes in and pounds away on him, followed by Savage dropping a double ax. An atomic drop sends Honky to the floor and he’s like screw this and takes the countout. Can you blame him?

Rating: B. This was a really fun match with a good story to it. The fans HATED Honky and the idea of getting him caught at the end with no one to defend him had the fans going nuts. Honky vs. Savage was a great feud but it never had a blowoff due to a bunch of backstage stuff. Honky would somehow hold the title nine more months before perhaps the greatest end to a title run ever at Summerslam. This was a great choice for a first match ever for the concept too as it showed how the idea worked and gave the fans something to cheer about too. Really good stuff.

Here’s Race in a dream match at SNME XV.

Hulk Hogan vs. Harley Race

HOLY CRAP THEY KEPT IT RIGHT! What I mean by that is Hogan’s shirt is torn both in the interview and in the intro. See, back in the day these interviews might be taped 4 months in advance in multi-hour long sessions. This would result in problems such as titles being different and clothing changing. In his interview, Hogan ripped up his shirt and he came out with a ripped shirt again. Most impressive indeed.

Hogan beats the heck out of Race before the bell rings. Cheater! They start brawling and Race takes over like he should be doing the entire time. It’s sad to see Race having to do this as he was a better worker than Hogan could ever dream of being. This is far closer to a brawl than an actual match which I think was the best choice in this case. Race hits the belly to belly and doesn’t even cover here. Good.

That is a terrible finisher no matter who uses it. This is your run of the mill Hogan match so there you are. What else do you expect here? Hogan is laid on a table and Race dives at him, missing though. The important thing here though is that the table spiked up and went into Race, injuring him and more or less ending his in ring career. The headbutt from the top hits but it’s Hogan in the 80s. What do you think he’s going to do? The usual ends it with what looked a lot like an edit. Heenan comes in and gets beaten up. Oh wait no he doesn’t as he DIVES over the top rope. That looked awesome.

Rating: B-. Pretty solid brawl here but nothing amazing. Race vs. Hogan is something close to a dream match but not from this era. Still though it’s cool to hear names like that announced as opponents given what they mean to the business as a whole. That being said, this was a decent match for Hogan’s standards.

Race also appeared at the second Survivor Series in 1988.

Team Jake Roberts vs. Team Andre the Giant

Jake Roberts, Ken Patera, Jim Duggan, Scott Casey, Tito Santana

Andre the Giant, Rick Rude, Dino Bravo, Mr. Perfect, Harley Race

Casey is a jobber who is here because B. Brian Blair left the company. Blair was on the team because JYD left, so Casey is the third string guy. Rude and Patera start things off. This would be around the time when Gorilla suggested that Patera retire because he wasn’t any good anymore, so you can tell what kind of stuff we’re about to get. Rude gets thrown around a bit and it’s off to Bravo, as Gorilla implies Patera made him retire. Now there’s a trivia answer for….somebody I guess.

Bravo bangs on Patera a bit before it’s off to Perfect (called Curt Hennig as well here) with a double ax off the top. Patera shrugs it off and drags Hennig over to hand him off to Roberts. Jake works on the arm as he was known to do before bringing in Santana. Tito and Hennig have as good of a match as you would expect them to have with Tito getting the better of it, only to miss a charge in the corner. Hennig elbows him down and it’s off to Bravo again. Talk about bringing the talent level down.

Off to Roberts who hits Bravo once and then brings in Casey to really cripple the level. A monkey flip doesn’t work for him and now he gets his first real opponent on PPV: Harley Race. Race beats up Casey like he’s a grizzled veteran who is here because his investment went south and he’s working for the guy who caused him to lose all his money and is now beating up some jobber who got a spot on a major show because there was no one else available.

Rude comes in again and it’s time for everyone to get their shots in on Casey. This has to be some kind of initiation or something. Hennig headbutts him and hurts himself in the process. Back to Tito as the match gets a lot better all of a sudden. Did I mention I really like Santana? Patera helps with a double elbow to Perfect and it’s off to Duggan to fire up the crowd again. Hennig tries various things to Duggan’s head which don’t work at all. See, when Duggan does it he follows up. When Casey does it, he doesn’t do anything. One is a legend, the other is never heard of again.

Off to Casey again for some contractually obligated reason more than likely and he’s immediately drilled by Rude which makes my day better. Casey misses a charge and it’s off to Tito with a cross body. Duggan beats up Hennig as well but he misses an elbow. Duggan and Henig hit heads and it’s off to Rude vs. Patera. Patera throws Rude around but misses a charge and gets Awakened for the first elimination.

Casey tries to come in and jump Rude, only to be sent into the heel corner and beaten up even worse than before. Off to Race who hits a good old man dropkick before bringing Bravo back in. Side slam hits and it’s 5-3. See you later Casey, have fun training that Booker T guy. It’s back to the bread and butter of this match with Perfect vs. Tito…the latter of whom immediately tags out and brings Duggan back in. Ok then.

Hennig kicks Duggan in the face which he sells for some reason, but the punches that follow aren’t sold and Duggan gets all fired up. Duggan, ever the lunkhead though, gets fired up near Andre who chokes him down immediately. Back to Hennig for a second and then Rude comes in for his offensive contribution. Duggan finally clotheslines Rick down and it’s a double tag for Tito and Race.

Since Race is a genius, he moves aside of a charging Tito and slams Tito’s head into Andre’s. Well that’s one thing he’s good for. Dino comes in again but misses a charge into the corner and gets sunset flipped for two. Back to Race for the piledriver for two and he whips Tito in, only to get forearmed out of nowhere for the quick elimination, making it 4-3. Andre climbs in, grabs Tito, chokes him a bit and sits on his chest. For reasons that no one could figure out, Tito tries a freaking sunset flip. Pain immediately comes to his chest and Andre makes it 4-2 (Andre, Dino, Rude, Hennig vs. Duggan and Roberts).

Duggan comes in and clotheslines Andre into the ropes, where he and Jake both get in some open shots on the Giant. Jake chokes away but Andre gets his arms free. Andre, being a smart giant, tags out after getting beaten up that badly and brings in Rude. Rude whips Jake into the buckle a few times as we hear about the Cheryl Roberts story. Off to Hennig with some chops and Andre kicks a bit from the apron because that’s what evil giants do.

Hennig slingshots Duggan throat first into the bottom rope so Andre can choke a bit more. Off to Bravo who gets beaten on by a suddenly fired up Roberts. The short clothesline looks to set up the DDT but Rude leans in to break it up. Rick comes in legally now and stomps away like he’s still in Memphis, which means very slowly with a lot of playing to the crowd in between.

Dino piledrives Jake for two but an elbow drop misses and here’s Hacksaw again. Duggan sends him into the corner and literally throws him out before clotheslining him down. The Three Point Clothesline is loaded up but Frenchy Martin, Bravo’s manager, hooks Duggan’s foot. Bravo slams Duggan on the floor so Duggan hits Bravo with the 2×4 for the DQ, leaving Roberts alone 3-1. Bravo manages to get a tag to Hennig before Jake can pin him so Roberts punches Perfect instead.

The DDT is loaded up but Perfect makes the corner and it’s off to Dino again. Jake, likely drunk, tries a test of strength with a guy billed as the world’s strongest man. When that doesn’t work Jake tries another DDT but is backdropped this time instead. Back to Rude and Jake heads to the floor to think. Well he is considered a master of psychology so thinking is what he does. That and cocaine.

Back in and Rude takes over again, hitting a gutbuster on the Snake. Would that even hurt a snake? Off to a bearhug but Jake quickly thumbs him in the eye. Rude hits a top rope punch and swivels the hips a bit, only to have his tights pulled down and DDTed for the elimination. Andre comes in and hammers Jake before choking him in the corner….for a DQ. It’s two on one which means nothing as Hennig immediately covers Jake for the pin and the final elimination.

Rating: C-. The lower half of this match being pretty weak really hurts it. Other than Jake, Andre and Duggan, at this point most of these guys didn’t mean much. Rude was on his way up but he was still a glorified midcard guy here. Just not a very interesting match and it definitely didn’t need to go half an hour.

Race would be injured in a match against Hulk Hogan, mostly ending his career. Here he is on fumes at the 1989 Royal Rumble.

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Race was King (a former title) but got hurt and the crown went to Haku. This is his chance to get it back in a one time only return to the ring. Harley shoves over Haku’s throne to start and the brawl is on. Back in and Race pounds away before suplexing Haku down for two. Heenan manages both guys here but Race is kind of the face by default.

They head to the floor again with Race being sent into the post and chopped a few times. Haku sends him back to the floor after a few seconds in the ring as we stall for a few moments. More chops have Race in trouble as Jesse talks about Hogan injuring Race, which is only kind of true (Hogan was in the match when Race was injured). Race no sells a headbutt and gets two off a piledriver. They collide again and Race falls to the floor as Heenan plays both sides, saying he’s for both guys when the other is out of earshot.

Back in and Race punches some more before getting two off a suplex. Haku gets sent to the floor again as it’s pretty clear there’s not much to this match. Race tries to piledrive Haku on the floor but gets backdropped as is the usual result for that move. A second attempt at a piledriver works for Race but not incredibly well. Back in and a clothesline puts Haku down for two but Haku comes back and misses a top rope headbutt. Race misses a headbutt of his own and charges into the superkick from Haku (looked great too) for the pin to keep the crown in Tonga or wherever he’s from.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible and the ending kick looked awesome, but other than that there wasn’t much to see here. Race was clearly old and banged up and he didn’t have a lot to work with in Haku. The crown was mostly a minor title that was only somewhat official anyway but this was a nice rub for Haku. Nothing to see here, but no one cares about anything but the Rumble tonight anyway.

Here’s his last big time match at Great American Bash 1990.

Harley Race vs. Tommy Rich

After this I’m pretty sure we get to the real part of the show. Race is in a singlet which I’ve never seen him wear before. Rich runs him over a few times and avoids an elbow. Off to a headlock and Race’s arm is rammed into the post. Race comes back with a piledriver which knocks Rich to the ramp. Rich gets suplexed out there as Race takes over.

Tommy comes back, knocking Race over the top and sending his head into the apron in the process. A middle rope elbow gets two. There’s a belly to belly from Race followed by a swinging neckbreaker. Rich comes back and tries a slam and they tumble to the floor. Back in, Rich tries a top rope cross body but Race rolls through for the surprise pin.

Rating: D. The match was boring and again I have no idea why it exists. We’re 45 minutes into a roughly three hour show and the best match has been a long Brian Pillman vs. Buddy Landell match. What’s the point of these things anyway? Wouldn’t they be better suited spaced out a bit? Unless they hope they’re having the best final two thirds ever, I really don’t understand this.

Harley Race is one of the wrestlers on almost everyone’s short lists for the greatest of all time. He’s been called one of the toughest men to ever set foot in a ring and it’s easy to see that holding up. Race is as perfect of a wrestler as you’ll ever find and is in the running for best ever. Not many people can say that but Harley Race can. One of the best ever, bar none.

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