This came to me the other day when I was thinking about WCW.It’s been about 12 years since WCW went out of business.  In about eight more years, new wrestlers as well as fans aren’t going to have any memories of WCW when it was around.  All they’re going to know is what WWE tells them to remember through DVDs.  As someone who grew up with WCW, that’s a rather saddening thought.

Slamboree 1999
Date: May 9, 1999
Location: TWA Dome, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 20,516
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

Another WCW PPV for you here. This one looks a little less boring than the Bash, but that’s not really saying much. The main event here is Page, the world champion, defending against Nash. We also get the first bout in the EPIC Flair vs. Piper feud, and I’m sure you’re all dying to see that. Let’s get to it.

We open with your standard video talking about a big match tonight, which here is Goldberg vs. Sting. Also Flair vs. Piper plus a few others but it’s mainly those two.

Tony is in a leather jacket for some reason. The announcers run down the card.

Tag Titles: Raven/Perry Saturn vs. Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko

Raven and Saturn are back together again for some reason. The Horsemen (Benoit and Malenko) are heels. Raven and Saturn are rather popular. I really like WCW’s style in these matches as three are three men in the ring at once. Oh and Rey/Kidman are the champions. Kidman, Dean and Saturn start us off. Saturn is in a skirt due to a long story with Jericho.

Malenko gets beaten down and Saturn beats up Benoit who I guess got a tag. Saturn throws Kidman over the top in a release belly to belly. That landing looked SICK. You can’t tag someone from another team in this match. BIG Horsemen Suck chant. Raven covers Benoit and avoids a slingshot leg from Rey. Benoit and Kidman drape Raven over the top and then Benoit smashes Billy.

This is a very fast paced match so it’s hard to keep up with everything. A top rope splash by Kidman misses Benoit as Raven is on the floor. He manages to break up the Crossface though and double teams Benoit with Saturn. Frog splash to Benoit gets two. In a move that literally made my jaw drop, Dean launches Rey over his shoulder and Rey LANDS ON THE BUCKLE ON HIS FEET and hits a moonsault press for two. THAT WAS AWESOME.

Saturn dives on everyone not named Benoit and Raven. Benoit hits the Swan Dive to Raven for two but Saturn saves. The Horsemen double team Rey and now they beat up Saturn. The tagging aspect has been dropped for the time being. And of course just as I say that it’s officially Benoit vs. Kidman vs. Saturn. Kidman fights back and the fans cheer. BIG superkick from Saturn takes him down though. The crowd is really into this.

Benoit hits a springboard forearm over the top (think Jericho and his dropkick to the apron) to take out Saturn. The two of them are in the ring and a northern lights suplex gets two for the Canadian. Here are the Rolling Germans but Kidman makes the save. Dean gets a tag and gets rolled up by Saturn in a reversal to the Cloverleaf. Saturn is knocked to the floor and things slow down a bit.

Dean is like screw slow and KILLS Kidman with a powerbomb for two. Dragon Suplex to Kidman gets a delayed two. Dean tries to throw Billy into the air but Kidman hits a dropkick in mid air to break it up. Russian legsweep takes Benoit down and there’s the tag to Raven for a big reaction. He hits what we would call Three Amigos to Benoit for two. Back to Saturn who is a bit spent.

Rey vs. Saturn vs. Benoit at this point. Saturn saves a pin on Rey as Malenko and Kidman come in. Saturn and Benoit are down and Kidman isn’t sure who to jump on. Dean tries another powerbomb on him but Kidman rolls into a sunset flip. Everything breaks down and the champs hit a SWEET alley-oop rana to Benoit in the corner. They try it on Saturn but he hits a top rope sitout powerbomb to Rey for two. Arn comes in and hits a spinebuster on Saturn to HUGE heel heat. Someone in a Sting mask breaks up the Shooting Star by crotching Kidman. An elevated Even Flow gives Raven/Saturn the belts. Kanyon was in the mask.

Rating: B. This is better than probably any other match I’ve seen in all of WCW so far in 1999. They were all over the place in here and beating the living tar out of each other, which is the best thing you can ask for. Also the popular team wins off a big ending with the DDT. Very good match, but now things are going to fall through the floor, which is WCW in a nutshell.

Video on DDP.

Konnan vs. Stevie Ray

Horace and Vincent of the NWO Black and White are with Ray. The fans here in St. Louis are awesome as they’ll cheer for any face and boo any heel. Why is that so complex? Ray pounds him down in the corner but Konnan pounds him on the middle rope while making oral sex gestures. Vincent gets on the apron to break up a pin attempt. He cheats a bit more on the floor and the fans aren’t all that thrilled here.

Off to a chinlock as Ray thinks of something new he can do other than kicks and forearms. He chokes away which is at least new. Back to the chinlock for more time in the think tank. Suplex gets two and there’s the jump off the ropes into a boot spot. Konnan speeds things up and messes up a leapfrog. X Factor puts Ray down but Horace trips K-Dawg up. Here’s Rey to distract the goons and Konnan wins with a rollup (with a pretty fast count).

Rating: D-. Really dull match here but at least it was kind of logical: once Rey is there to counteract Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber, Konnan can get the pin on his own. Stevie is just so freaking boring without Booker there to help him out that there’s no need to have him out here, especially on a PPV. Boring match and not any good at all.

Video on Kevin Nash.

Video on Sting.

Page talks to Bigelow in the back but we can’t hear what’s being said.

Brian Knobbs vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

This is for the moniker King of Hardcore, which isn’t an official title. This of course is a hardcore match if you didn’t get the idea there. There isn’t going to be much to talk about in this. It’s your standard hardcore match with both guys being hit in the head with generic pieces of metal. There’s an RVD sign in the crowd. Heenan tells the announcers to be quiet so he can hear the weapon shots.

Bigelow hits a top rope headbutt for two. Out to the floor and there’s still nothing to talk about. It’s pretty much the same as every hardcore match you’ll ever see. Knobbs’ trashcan shot is blocked by a waiter’s tray which winds up going on top of Brian’s head. Bigelow is in control here. The fans want a table. There are long stretches here where there’s nothing to talk about. It’s just random weapon shots and the announcers laughing.

They fight up the aisle with Knobbs using a trashcan to keep control. There’s the internet location getting its required cameo. They go old school here with the fake souvenir stand that no fan would be able to get to because it’s on the arena floor. We go behind a curtain (revealing about 1/5 of the arena being tarped off) and there’s a ladder shot. An elbow off the stands onto a table misses for Knobbs (I think, you can’t see anything) and Bigelow suplexes him through the table for the pin.

Rating: F. Heenan’s final line of “and they do this for a living” sums things up well. Why in the world did Knobbs of all people have a job here? The match sucked due to there being nothing interesting here at all. There was no comedy spot, there was nothing other than the most basic weapons available, and nothing interesting happened at all. Bad match and really boring. Also it ran almost 12 minutes. Inexcusable.

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Booker. Booker won a match against Steiner with help from Stevie, who is in the NWO (Booker never was). Ray saved him again but Rick came in to beat him up. Rick vs. Booker started up again so let’s have a TV Title match again.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Booker T

Booker is champion here if I didn’t make that clear. Rick starts out with a belly to belly release and a couple of Steiner Lines. I think he’s the heel here but I’m not sure. More control by Steiner until Booker kicks him in the face to put him down. Steiner pops up of course because he isn’t going to sell anything. Off to a chinlock by Booker. I think he’s either heel here or borderline heel.

Steiner takes over on the floor and things slow way down. Time for a chinlock again. The crowd is very quiet. Steiner punches a lot and the fans don’t care. A bunch of punches gets two and here’s that chinlock again. Booker fights back and hits the axe kick, a spinebuster and the missile dropkick but STEINER WON’T SELL THEM. Here’s what happens after every move: Steiner lays there about 2-4 seconds then gets up like nothing happened. Scott finally runs out for the distraction and a Steiner Line gets two. Scott trips Booker and the Bulldog off the ropes gives Rick the title.

Rating: D. Just a horribly boring match here as Rick is beyond worthless in the ring at this point. Naturally the answer to that is to give him a title for four months. He wouldn’t sell ANYTHING Booker did here and Booker looks like a joke as a result. Bad match but as usual, most of it is due to Rick being lazy and not selling anything.

Time to recap the stupid match of the show. Randy Savage is out of wrestling at this point so he’s putting one of his chicks (the hot one) in there against Lil Naitch in the form of referee Charles Robinson. Yes this match is happening.

Rick rambles to Buff in the back and wishes him luck against Scott later. Gee, that must be totally genuine right?

Gorgeous George vs. Charles Robinson

Ok to be fair, Robinson’s Flair costume is AWESOME. He has the robe, he has the hair, he looks exactly like a small Nature Boy. Even his face looks like him. Flair and Savage are seconds here. Asya and the other chicks are here too. To be fair, George was indeed hot. Flair, the President of WCW at the time, says he’d like to have Madusa ride Space Mountain. Miss Maddness can come too, but George is being saved for Robinson. Robinson rips George a bit and he sounds EXACTLY like Flair. This is the best imitation I’ve seen in years. Savage (POP) says George will win.

Robinson struts a lot as they stall for a few minutes. George goes after the arm and Robinson reverses. Off to a full nelson and snapmare as George is dominant. Flair and Robinson get rammed together so Savage has to come in and protect George. Robinson goes for a chair but Miss Madness steals it. She gets slammed outside and Savage FREAKS. I mean freaks by his standards.

Back in Robinson takes over with a choke and then does more of that. George comes back with a few chops and Robinson does the flip in the corner and runs the apron, only to get slammed off the top. Heenan says this is great and I can’t say I disagree. There’s a Flair Flop and they’re getting tired. The heels cheat a bit and work over George’s knee but Madusa makes the save.

Robinson works on the knee and if the match continues like it has, that means we’re heading for the Figure Four. He hooks the knee a bit and cranks on it for awhile. Here’s the Figure Four and while it looks good, it’s on the wrong knee. She reverses it and Flair comes in for the save. Savage chases him off and beats up Robinson so George can drop a half decent looking middle rope elbow for the pin. Savage is reinstated.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but at the end of the day we have a referee and a manager in there. Robinson’s Flair impression is absolutely excellent and one of the best I’ve ever seen. George really is gorgeous and it’s a shame she wasn’t around in wrestling more than she was. That being said, this was decent enough all things considered. Ten and a half minutes was too long, but it wasn’t boring and they were trying which is more important than anything else.

We recap Scott Steiner vs. Buff Bagwell. Bagwell was a face and made fun of him so Steiner said he had a big ego. Bagwell imitated him and it wasn’t really funny.

US Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Since Bagwell never won a singles title, I think you know who is champion coming in. Buff jumps him before the bell and Steiner still has the belt on. Swinging neckbreaker gets two. Scott hits him low and there’s the Push-Up elbow. Buff gets thrown to the floor and Steiner yells at some fans. Things slow WAY down with Steiner on offense. It was a running theme with the Steiners at this point.

Scott chokes away and yells at another fan. Much like in the Rick match, you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. They go to the mat and Steiner elbows him a lot. He runs to the floor and brings in a chair. If that shot had hit Steiner would have been facing 10-15 years. Bagwell fights back but there goes the referee. Buff gets the chair and here’s Rick to turn heel on Buff and whack him with the chair. The Recliner keeps the title on Scott.

Rating: D-. I can’t take many more of these bad matches. I mean the people in them are just SO lazy with them laying around and doing nothing of note. Scott and Rick are back together as the Steiners and both have singles titles. You know, because that’s what the people wanted to see and would light the world on fire. Benoit and Jericho and Malenko? Who are they?

Video on Goldberg. These videos are just their music playing over clips of them. They only last about 15-20 seconds each.

Now to really crank it up, here’s a video on all four people in the main events. There aren’t any words to this so the feuds still aren’t explained.

The third straight video (at least they’re short) is on Flair being president and being insane. He’s signing contracts without reading them and one of them is for a match with Piper for the Presidency. Flair thinks he’s President of the United States. I kid you not, this was the second biggest wrestling company in the world at this point. Oh and he went to a mental hospital and thought he was in a hotel. Again, this is what we mean when we say insulting to our intelligence.

Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair

The winner is the president. Before things get going, referee Johnny Boone is fired and Charles Robinson replaces him. Flair runs his mouth and gets slapped to get us going. Piper knocks him to the floor and let’s take a break after that. He boxes Flair, seemingly hitting him in the chest and neck, but Flair falls anyway. He hits a low blow to take over and Robinson yells at Piper for choking.

Flair yells at Anderson to beat on Piper when he throws him outside. Flair throws Piper outside and Anderson beats on him. Asya comes in for a low blow and this is about as far from serious as you could want it to be. Flair chops away in the corner and Piper chops back. Robinson cheats on a cover and says Flair keeps getting his shoulder up. There’s the Flair Flip in the corner and they go to the outside.

Piper rams Flair’s head into Flair’s arm but we’ll say it was the post anyway. Back in the ring they ram heads and both guys are down. After about 2 seconds of leg softening here’s the Figure Four. Piper tries a sunset flip and there go the trunks. He hooks Flair in the Figure Four and Flair screams that he gives up but Robinson ignores it. Anderson breaks it up but gets thrown in a sleeper. Now Flair in the sleeper. Asya runs in and gets kissed and put in a sleeper as well. The referee gets decked and Flair hits Piper with an illegal object for the pin.

Rating: The chipmunk has pneumonia. I better take him to the embassy before he deletes the remote control of reality and I run out of apple juice. If he does that, there will be a great and mighty feast in the great archway of the flippyflook.

And that was more logical than putting this match on PPV. But wait: there’s more.

Here’s Eric Bischoff who hasn’t been seen in awhile and has no authority whatsoever in this company. He says Piper is the winner and that Flair can bite him. Somehow this stands. Eric and Piper hug to a face pop (intentional I’d assume but who knows with this company?) and Piper fires Flair. Just….yeah.

Recap of Sting vs. Goldberg. This is for who the franchise is or something.

Sting vs. Goldberg

Tony is either trying to explain what we just saw or is questioning it himself. I’m really not sure. I’m also not sure why this match is happening but who cares? Sting has white boots with black toes. It makes as much sense as anything else here. Goldberg takes him down and snaps off a powerslam for no cover. Sting stalls on the floor and then takes Goldberg to the floor with a clothesline.

Goldberg hooks a cross armbreaker but it isn’t on correctly. Sting fights out of it and we go to a test of strength. He takes out Goldberg’s braced knee (oh sweet psychology, how I missed you) and puts on a Boston Crab which is quickly broken. Goldberg fights back with power moves and things slow WAY down. Top rope clothesline by Sting sets up some Stinger Splashes but Goldberg catches him in a spinebuster which is called a spear. And here’s Bret Hart with a chair and it’s a no contest.

Rating: D. Another bad match. I mean seriously, this show SUCKS. There’s been nothing but boring matches (aside from the opener) and stuff that is basically around to set up matches on Nitro rather than HERE ON THE FREAKING PPV. Nothing to see here as they basically kept it as slow gear as possible.

And then the Steiners run out and beat up Goldberg and Sting. WHY ARE THEY THE FOCAL POINT OF A SHOW IN 1999????

Another wordless video on Page vs. Nash. No word on why they’re fighting but there’s clearly no thinking anywhere else in this show so who cares?

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash

And Buffer’s mic doesn’t work right. Seriously, fold already. You can hear him in the arena but not over the PPV feed. Page is champion. Early Cutter attempt is blocked and Page hits the floor. We actually get a reference to the Vegas Connection. Page hammers away but runs his mouth to get himself sent to the floor. Back inside and Nash hammers away. Page charges at Nash and finally kicks him low to take over.

Page rips a buckle off and hits him with the mic for two. He gets sent into the exposed steel though and both guys are down. Page takes over and sends him to the floor. A baseball slide puts Nash down and there’s a Diamond Cutter to kill Nash out there. It only gets two in the ring but at least there was a delay. Now Page goes for the knee for no apparent reason.

He wraps it around the post a few times and pounds on Nash again. There’s something going on in the crowd so they change the camera angle, which is pretty smart. Nash makes his comeback and hits Snake Eyes onto the buckle. Back to the regular angle. Nash….at least limp. Big boot and Jackknife….but here’s Savage to break it up for the LAME DQ. So is he a heel now too?

I would rate it here, but Eric comes out AGAIN and restarts the match. Russian legsweep gets two for the champ. Discus lariat gets the same. And here’s a sleeper, which looks awful because Nash is so tall. Now Nash hooks an even WORSE sleeper but Page jawbreaks his way out of it for two. A chair shot hits the rope and Page takes it in the face for two. Low blow gets two for Page. And then Nash kicks the chair into Page’s face, takes the straps down and wins the title via the Jackknife.

Rating: D. The fans popped for the ending, but I’m just spent at this point. There’s nothing interesting here and the run in and restart made no sense, which is what the name of the show should be. Nash would hold the title for a few months before dropping it to Savage before Hogan took it the next night. This was nothing interesting at all and the knee selling coming and going hurt things.

Overall Rating: F-. This is usually were I’d make some witty statement about how this show was so bad it goes beyond bad ratings or something, but there’s nothing left in me after watching this mess. The illogical stories, the stupid booking, the overdoing it with the Steiners, the worthless world title change, and the bad matches just made me completely uninterested by the end of this show. I haven’t felt like that about a PPV in a very long time, but this just drained me completely.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Slamboree 2000
Date: May 7, 2000
Location: Kemper Arena, Kansas City, Missouri
Attendance: 7,165
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, Scott Hudson

 

Since I’m running out of PPVs to do and I don’t really have many shows in WCW to do marathons with, I’ll just go chronologically but in reverse of the ones I haven’t done. In other words, I’m doing this show and then Spring Stampede from the previous month and Super Brawl from February so that I have the year 2000 complete. As for this show, it’s 2000 WCW and David Arquette is world champion. Need I say more? Let’s get to it.

 

We open with a clip from Thunder with the New Blood facing off with the Millionaire’s Club in a 22 man battle royal. The winner gets the shot at the Great American Bash. This resulted in Randy Savage returning for his final WCW appearance and Flair winning.

 

The Millionaire’s Club arrives on their bus while the New Blood watches. Old vs. New in a Bischoff company? Surely you jest!

 

Opening video is about Flair vs. Douglas which is a big feud in the mind of Shane Douglas. Oh and other old vs. new matches are here also.

 

Cruiserweight Title: The Artist vs. Chris Candido

 

Candido is champion. Tammy does the show me thing because it’s the Show Me state. She does look decent but it’s not quite Sunny levels. Candido is New Blood as is Artist kind of. The New Blood has all titles other than the Hardcore Title which we’ll get to next review. Artist is Prince Iaukea and wrestles in a collared shirt and dress pants. They botch something to start and Candido is launched over the top to the floor.

 

Chris goes up for a big dive and lands on Artist. The fans aren’t all that interested but some of the spots look ok. There’s a ramp again and Artist goes head first into it. Piledriver out there doesn’t work and back in we go. Why did Iaukea keep getting pushed? I mean the guy was nothing special in the ring and his gimmicks never really worked nor were they anything interesting, so why did he constantly have a job?

 

Artist is sent to the floor again as this is a pretty sloppy match. By sloppy I mean it feels like they’re just going through moves with zero rhyme or reason. The moves aren’t anything interesting other than some dives which are ok at best. Back in and Candido hits a low blow to take over again.

 

Artist tries his jumping DDT off the top which misses and they do a horrible looking rollup for two. The fans aren’t pleased to say the least. Iaukea gets a Samoan Drop off the middle rope but Tammy and Paisley go at it to distract the referee. Sunny swings for Paisley with a chair and hits Artist by mistake. It gets three and the bell rings but the referee says two. Candido hits a swan dive and now it’s three. Well ok then.

 

Rating: D+. Meh is a good word here and that’s about all there is to say about it. Neither guy is anything interesting at all and the match wasn’t any good either. The botches were pretty bad and it was something resembling heel vs. heel. I have no idea what the point of the Artist was and I don’t think WCW or the fans did either.

 

Tammy gets stripped post match.

 

The announcers make fun of Arquette being champion.

 

Video of Terry Funk getting beaten up a lot.

 

Hardcore Title: Terry Funk vs. Norman Smiley/???

 

Funk is “the one that got away” and is the only champion who isn’t New Blood. It’s a handicap match and Funk goes to find Norman in a bathroom. Norman jumps him with a fire extinguisher which is his first brilliant idea ever. He’s in a Royals jersey and the mystery partner was in the bathroom in a catcher’s mask. Funk is getting destroyed here as Norman keeps throwing trashcans at him.

 

They break through Mean Gene’s interview area and Madden makes pitcher/catcher jokes. We still don’t know who the mystery partner is. Funk realizes he’s fighting a fat guy in a catcher’s mask and Norman Smiley so he goes on offense. Norman is doing everything here as the mystery partner is just standing there. The announcers are pointing out that he’s the worst mystery partner ever so it’s intentional.

 

Funk covers Smiley and the mystery guy is holding a trashcan. He has a bunch of clear shots and does nothing with them. They haven’t been in the arena at all yet. We even get a Bubba the Love Sponge reference from Madden. Norman is gone and Funk beats up the masked fat dude. He beats the mask out of the mystery man and it’s RALPHUS!!! There goes the shirt and Smiley has to make the save with a ladder.

 

They’re in the ring now and the fans don’t really know who Ralphus is. Oh wait I think they do now. The announcers are dying from this and to be fair it’s a comedy match so I think this is all ok. Funk is busted open by “the Hardcore Wiggler”. Norman busts out the Big Wiggle and the fans LOVE it. Now Ralphus wants to wiggle. Oh dear. Terry does the first smart thing of the match and kills Ralphus dead with a chair and rolls up Norman to retain.

 

Rating: C. It’s a comedy match and it didn’t try to be anything other than that. This is one of those matches that you know what you’re getting when you sign up for it and if you’re expecting something else you’ve totally missed the point. The fans were into the idea of this and reacted pretty well to Ralphus once they got what was going on and that’s all they needed to do. This was fine.

 

Norman and Ralphus dance post match and the fans love it. Since it’s WCW though, he was never pushed as anything for the fans because that might make them happy right?

 

Arquette gets here and says he has his own money and doesn’t need his wife’s money. Thanks for sharing?

 

Shawn Stasiak vs. Curt Hennig

 

Ok so the idea here is that Stasiak is known as the Perfect One and he’s openly stealing Hennig’s character. If Stasiak had been more talented, this could have been a decent idea. We talk about how both guys are second generation guys and that Stasiak’s dad held a version of the world title (WWF Title) but no mention is made of Hennig holding the AWA belt.

 

They trade armdrags and it’s some very basic and technical stuff to get us going. The Misfits in Action are at ringside for no apparent reason. They were fired or something but were running in anyway. Stasiak chokes him on the announce table and hits a top rope clothesline for two. The mat is echoing a lot. They go back to the ramp and Hennig can’t slam him.

 

Off to a sleeper by Stasiak and the fans think it’s boring. I can’t exactly say I disagree since this has been a pretty uninteresting match all around. They’re just going through the motions that you go through when you have a wrestling match and it’s nothing interesting at all. Hennig starts his comeback and hammers away with strikes and his back appears to be fine now. Back to the Misfits for no reason. Why do we keep cutting to them? Either way since it’s a Hennig match, he takes a slingshot into the post and the Hennigplex ends this for Stasiak. Stasiak used the Hennigplex to win if that’s unclear.

 

Rating: D. I don’t get this one. Hennig looked like a total joke and the match never started at all for the most part. It’s just boring and the crowd really didn’t care. They seemed to like Hennig and then he got crushed for the most part. This was just a step ahead of a squash, which isn’t what you expect when you have these two in the ring.

 

Scott Steiner seems mad at Russo.

 

US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Hugh Morrus

 

Morrus says his name is now Hugh G. Rection. Oh here we go. That’s his REAL name too. Oh dear. At least we get to see Shakira and Midajah with Steiner. Steiner is champion here and hammers away in the corner to start. Rection wants to be called Captain Rection. He sends Steiner to the floor and it’s time to stall. Madden gets in his jokes like Rection is working stiff in there.

 

The girls try to distract Rection and since faces are idiots, it allows Steiner to take over again. Spinwheel kick gets two for the challenger. Top rope elbow gets no cover because as explained earlier: Rection is an idiot. The girls cheat again and crotch Rection because he was stupid enough to go up top right in front of them. Steiner goes for the elbow/pushups but instead of doing the pushups he lunges at the referee. Well he is insane you know. If you didn’t you’ll be told at least 47 times in 5 minutes.

 

A suplex gets two so Steiner yells that the referee sucks. Off to a bearhug as Steiner squeezes the life out of him. Another suplex hits and Steiner stops to argue with a fan. A pretty bad butterfly suplex/powerbomb gets no cover so Rection reverses a tombstone for another non-cover. The girls interfere AGAIN and the moonsault misses. The Recliner ends this.

 

Rating: D. This match sums up both WCW and Russo in a nutshell: it’s not a horrible power brawl but the same stuff over and over again like people needing to cover when they shouldn’t and then the girls running in every 8 seconds keeps the matches from ever getting good. That being said, there’s only so much you can get out of these two, especially when Steiner was all nuts and such. Also, the guy’s name is Hugh G. Rection. That takes me out of the match every time I hear it and that’s not what should happen in a serious match.

 

Booker makes the save post match from a bigger beating.

 

Kanyon says he’s supporting Page and that blood is thicker than water. It’s a promo about how he sees Page as a brother and he’ll never turn on him. In about three months or so, say it with me, HE TURNS ON PAGE. Keep that in mind as we get to the ending of the show because it will make you roll your eyes very hard.

 

Mike Awesome vs. Kanyon

 

This is serious Awesome and not the 70s Guy yet. Awesome put Kanyon through a table to set this up. The fans are all distracted by something else to start so Awesome hits a HUGE dive to the floor, drawing an ECW chant. Kanyon sends him into the post as there’s more energy in this match than the rest of the show combined up to this point. Kanyon hits a running front flip dive off the apron to put Awesome down.

 

Back in and Awesome hits a top rope clothesline for two. Back to the floor and Mike fires off some chair shots to put Chris down. Yes I’m on first name basis with the two dead guys. They fight into the crowd and Awesome keeps the advantage. Back in and we debate the best powerbomb in wrestling with Nash being declared the best. Back to the floor again for about the fourth time and Kanyon gets hit with a chair again. They were using “relaxed rules” at this point which meant they were trying to rip off ECW and the WWF formula in every match instead of just the main events like WWF did.

 

Kanyon crotches Mike on the top and hits a reverse neckbreaker for two. Another neckbreaker gets two. The fans are getting into this quickly. Samoan Drop into a front face drop gets two. Kanyon tries a powerbomb but gets caught in an Alabama Slam for no cover. There’s the regular powerbomb and Kanyon lands on his head. FREAKING OW MAN.

 

Awesome, probably trying to let Kanyon figure out if he’s alive or not, goes outside and pulls the pads back. Kanyon is like screw it and fights back but gets caught by a slingshot shoulder block by Awesome. He loads up the over the top powerbomb but Kanyon escapes, only to allow the American to hit a German to the American (Kanyon) and outside we go again. Awesome sets for something and here’s Nash for the run-in. The rest of the New Blood and Millionaire’s Club come in also and it’s thrown out.

 

Rating: B-. I was liking it but the constant going outside and the stupid ending hurt it a lot. This felt like the main event of Nitro rather than a definitive PPV match. These two had some chemistry together and it was a good match as a result. Keep these two in mind as they’ll be back later on to totally ruin the show in the end.

 

We recap Luger vs. Bagwell for the 8000th time. The idea here is that Russo has “stolen” Liz or something and Luger wants her back. Bagwell is the guy doing the fighting for Russo.

 

Russo tells Liz there’s a surprise coming and that Liz needs to go change her rather sexy dress.

 

Lex Luger vs. Buff Bagwell

 

Oh wait it’s the Total Package. Yeah screw that. Based on the entrances you would think that the stoic Luger is heel and the energetic Buff was the face but it’s WCW so why would logic be in use here? Tony: “Are Kronik the world tag team champions?” Good to see that ace journalism we’ve come to know and love from WCW. Lots of stalling to start as both guys have to pose.

 

Buff takes over and plays to the crowd too much to be a heel. Luger is supposed to be all distracted which is why he’s not destroying Bagwell early on. Then Tony messes up that whole dynamic as he says this is an even match most of the time. Lex gets a suplex for two. Luger takes over and we head to the floor. That lasts only a few moments as Buff hits a double arm DDT for two.

 

And let’s hit that chinlock! Bagwell wastes some time with that and hits a splash of all things for two. This show isn’t particularly horrible but it’s just boring. These are the worst kind of shows because it’s not something that bad but there’s nothing to get excited about or interested in at all. Camel clutch goes on to kill some more time. Bagwell does the Arn Anderson spot where he jumps out of a hold onto Luger’s knees to crotch him.

 

We cut to Russo in the back who says this is the best part. Liz runs in with a bat and whacks Russo in the knees. Good thing there was a ball bat laying around. She comes out with the bat and swings it at Buff but gets caught, allowing Buff to get a shot in at Luger with said bat. Now Liz manages to hit Buff and the Rack ends this because a professional wrestler hitting you in the ribs with a baseball bat isn’t enough to prevent Luger from throwing said wrestler onto his shoulders right?

 

Rating: D. Another pretty weak match here but the point of it was that Lex gets his chick back which was accomplished. Well that and the new feud starting up which we’ll get to here in a second. That being said, it wasn’t a good match. There was way too much stalling and the face/heel dynamic was all over the place. That’s the running theme of this show: not terrible ideas being executed badly.

 

Luger and Liz celebrate and Chuck Palumbo debuts as the New Total Package, complete with the same outfit as the surprise. What a Perfect idea that we haven’t seen before. Palumbo gets a Perfect Torture Rack to leave him there. Liz is stolen again.

 

Shane Douglas rants about Flair because Flair has caused every single one of Shane’s problems in his career. If you don’t agree, just talk to Shane because he can’t go 5 minutes without explaining it to you.

 

Shane Douglas vs. Ric Flair

 

Flair is in street clothes and gets five minutes with Russo if he wins. He insists on having the ropes opened for him because he’s world champion. Not exactly but Flair was never known for sanity. Flair even references ECW and here we go. They chop it out and Flair takes over because that’s what he does. Flair gets slammed off the top and Shane hooks a Figure Four. Shane is no Jay Lethal though so Flair makes the ropes.

 

Ric takes three low blows but chops away again. Another figure four is reversed and Flair gets a Greco Roman Ball Shot to the Franchise and we head to the floor. Flair pounds away for a bit and back inside now. Shane hits a suplex and pulls out his signature chain. Shane hits rolling vertical suplexes which were kind of cool.

 

Flair fights back with his usual stuff and kicks Douglas in the balls a lot. This lack of disqualifications is really getting old as it totally takes you out of the wrestling aspect of the show. Flair goes after the knee and goes for the Figure Four but here’s “Russo” in a Sting mask to hit him with a bat, letting Shane get a rollup for the pin.

 

Rating: D+. I hate to keep giving these not horrible matches such low grades but a lot of them just aren’t that good. The DQ stuff is really getting old because the matches turn into brawls with all kinds of low blows and chair shots and it’s not interesting after about two of them. Flair is in street clothes for no apparent reason and the interference (again) is what ends this one also, just like earlier. Not thrilled with this one at all.

 

Post match, you guessed it: more ball shots. Bagwell is here too. “Russo”, still in the Sting mask, is told to get in the ring. Luger comes out and throws him in but Russo comes up from behind and blasts Luger (who is fine apparently) with something. And “Sting” is David Flair. This would start a LONG feud where David turned on his father for being a bad father and made Russo into his dad. The five minute clock starts while Russo hammers on Flair with the bat. Here’s Nash but Daffney distracts him letting Russo, David and Daffney stand tall after some bat shots. This took way too long.

 

We recap Sting vs. Vampiro. They’re both insane and into the creepy/occult stuff and there were bloodbaths involved.

 

Sting vs. Vampiro

 

They brawl on the ramp to start and Sting hits a quick suplex to take over. Into the ring and Sting hits a missile dropkick and a big dive back to the floor. WHERE HAS THIS STING BEEN FOR THE LAST FIVE YEARS??? They go to the announce table and Sting DDTs him on the floor. All Sting so far. Back in the ring and Vampiro comes back with what else, a low blow.

 

Top rope clothesline ala Kane puts Sting down and Vampy goes out to grab a lead pipe. See, this is what I’m talking about. The referee is totally cool with this due to the “relaxed rules.” What does this prove about wrestling? It’s a Russo trademark and it gets really annoying, especially after two hours of it already. They have a quick brawl on the ramp with Vampiro totally in control.

 

The fans chant for Sting so he gets hit by another pipe shot, making it about four or five times now. Vampiro goes for some punches in the corner but gets caught by something resembling a powerbomb out of the corner after, say it with me, A LOW BLOW. Sting fires off some pipe shots and then two Splashes/Death Drops and we’re done.

 

Rating: C. Sting’s athletics made this one as he looked great out there and more fired up than I remember him being in forever in this period. The idea of Vampiro trying to be the new Sting and pushing him as far as he can until Sting overwhelmed him was well done, which is why they feuded for months on end after this right?

 

DDP and Arquette (dressed as Elvis if he was a gay vampire) agree that DDP will do the fighting and Arquette goes up top to hide but he shouldn’t grab the belt.

 

Nash is going Russo hunting.

 

Kidman is with Torrie, Bischoff and Kimberly. He’s ready for Hogan tonight and Bischoff is referee.

 

Billy Kidman vs. Hulk Hogan

 

Eric is referee here and this is Terry Bollea, aka Hulk Hogan according to the announcers. At least Kimberly is hot as a heel. Hogan has Horace with him. This is about Hogan saying Kidman couldn’t headline a match at a flea market so Kidman is all annoyed. Kidman got three fluke wins but this is the blowoff. And never mind Horace as he’s thrown out. Hogan ducks coming in and Kidman takes over.

 

They mess something up and Kidman gets a small package for two. You know for as big as Hogan is, it’s kind of weird to see him against someone that isn’t either as big or almost as big as him. And hey there’s a chair which Kidman is dropped onto ribs first. Hogan is in street clothes (kind of). Here’s something you don’t see every day: Hogan taking a hurricanrana.

 

They go out to the floor and Hogan sends Kidman into the railing to keep up the offense. Kidman sends Torrie into Hogan to shift things back again. It’s weight belt time but Eric steals it and has it “stolen” by Kidman. The fans are behind Hogan here at least. Hogan is like screw this and hits a hip toss over the top. Kidman knows how to bump very well so the flying all over the place makes Hogan’s power look great.

 

Back in Eric won’t count. Belly to back gets no count. Kidman avoids some elbows and stomps away. The idea of Kidman not being able to really hurt Hulk is the right idea because Hogan can’t be hurt by monsters so why should he here? Hogan realizes he’s fighting Billy Kidman and goes for the finish but Bischoff gets in the way of the legdrop. There’s a chair for Bischoff and Hogan gets a pair of tables from under the ring. One of them is broken so Hogan sets it against the ropes.

 

Out of nowhere though Kidman gets in a chair shot and Hogan is busted. To be fair the fans are completely behind Hogan here so the comeback is the right way to go. Kidman misses a chair shot and down goes Bischoff. Hogan puts Eric through a table and here’s a third piece of weak wood. Mark: “WHO PUTS ALL THESE TABLES OUT HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE???” Kidman gets a low blow in and puts up another table but the splash through it misses and Hogan gets the easy pin with Horace popping up to move Eric’s hand for him.

 

Rating: C+. Hulk Hogan just had the second best match of the night in 2000. I’m as shocked as you are. It’s not bad here as while it’s a huge mess, that’s the point of a gimmick match and it worked pretty well here. Kidman never went anywhere after this but the match wasn’t all that horrible and it’s fun to see Hogan do something other than a power match.

 

Russo runs from Nash.

 

We recap Jarrett vs. Page vs. Arquette which started with Jarrett getting Kimberly to turn New Blood and let Jeff win the title. Page got the title back so Jarrett took Arquette hostage, resulting in the most ridiculous thing in the history of wrestling: David Arquette won the World Heavyweight Championship. He tried to put it up in the cage match and vacate it but Bischoff made it a three way for no apparent reason.

 

Jarrett says he’ll win.

 

WCW World Title: David Arquette vs. Jeff Jarrett vs. Diamond Dallas Page

 

It’s a triple cage match where the bottom is like the Cell and there’s a hardcore cage on top of that, which has a bunch of weapons on it. On top of that there’s a cage with a bunch of guitars around it with a cage a single person can fit into. The belt is hanging from the ceiling above that cage which has to be climbed to pull the belt down. It really is an impressive looking structure.

 

While the introductions are going on, a few things should be noted about Arquette: he didn’t want to do this but Russo insisted it was a brilliant idea. Second, every dollar he made from this he donanted to the families of Owen Hart, Brian Pillman and Darren Drozdov (recently paralyzed in a match). Before I forget you have to use a ladder to get to the second cage through I’m guessing a trapdoor.

 

The bell rings and Arquette runs. Well at least he’s thinking. Basically you’ll get Page vs. Jarrett for the majority of the match which means it’ll be decent enough. Page gets a clothesline in the ring and calls for Arquette to go up to the top where he misses a splash. Page tries to get a ladder but Jarrett hits a baseball slide to send Page into the cage again. And down goes David as Page sends Jarrett into Arquette into the cage.

 

Page posts Jeff and goes for the ladder and ultimately the second cage. Jarrett is busted open but manages to suplex Page off the ladder. The ladder is in the corner and not set up so both guys are sent into it as is the ladder match custom. Jeff brings in a second ladder and they both start climbing. Page knocks him off and is in the second cage first. Jeff follows quickly and instead of just going through the door he grabs a weapon and gets caught.

 

The floor of the cage they’re in is made of the top of the other cage and has wide spaces, making it easy to slip in. Page is busted also and Jarrett tries to climb the wall, only to get caught. They ram each other into the cage wall and it falls down. Keep in mind they’re on top of something the size of Hell in a Cell. This isn’t exactly on the mat and almost falling to the floor.

 

Hey, I have a great idea! LET’S SET UP A TABLE ON TOP OF A CAGE WITH BIG HOLES IN THE FLOOR! Page gets something like a powerslam through it and both guys are down. The floor is pretty weak but it’s not as bad as a scaffold match. Arquette hasn’t been seen in about five minutes. There he is and here he comes. Arquette goes to the top of the hardcore cage and is totally alone, meaning he could easily retain the title. Since he doesn’t, you might as well hold up a big sign saying SHOCK HEEL TURN.

 

Page sets for a Diamond Cutter on Jarrett on top of the Cell (they’re outside the hardcore cage so it’s almost like the moat of a castle if that makes sense) but Mike Awesome pops in to break it up. There’s a Diamond Cutter for him and Arquette is on top of the third cage. Page and Jarrett go up and head into the guitar room. Jarrett misses a shot as does Page. He hands one to Arquette to play defense with and as both wrestlers climb, say it with me, ARQUETTE TURNS ON PAGE. Jarrett wins the title.

 

Rating: B. Above all else, this match shows the fundamental flaw in Vince Russo’s style: this was a good match and there was zero reason for Arquette to be involved at all. As explained during the match, Jarrett was mad at Page because Page was in Ready to Rumble and he wasn’t. They met in a tournament final at the previous PPV for the title with Jarrett winning and then Page got the belt, making this the blowoff match.

 

DDP vs. Jarrett in a big gimmick cage match (from the movie so it makes even more sense) is more than ok for a PPV main event. They have chemistry together too so the match was going to be pretty good at least. But for Russo that’s not enough so he adds in David Arquette, making it look like any guy off the street (which for Arquette is true from a physical standpoint) can win the title. The title looks bad and instead of WCW having a match that looks like it’s even more crazy and awesome than Hell in a Cell, this match is remembered for David Arquette coming in as world champion. Just let the wrestlers wrestle.

 

Post match Awesome sets for a powerbomb off the cage but Kanyon makes the save. Then Awesome throws Kanyon off the cage and through the ramp, making the announcers all stoic like he’s dead. The shot of Kanyon laying motionless ends the show.

 

Did I mention this is the arena where Owen Hart fell to his death less than a year before this show?

 

Overall Rating: D. This is one of those really hard ones to grade. They’ve done such worse shows that you really can’t call this their worst. Even though most of the matches were pretty weak they were trying and there’s certainly a coherent story to the show. It’s not a good shot to put it mildly but it goes by quick and nothing is atrocious. Most of the bad matches would have been better if the “relaxed rules” hadn’t been in place. This isn’t horrible but other than the main event there isn’t much to see here at all.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book on the history of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

 

Monday Nitro #86
Date: May 5, 1997
Location: Jenkins Center, Lakeland, Florida
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Heenan

It’s another hour long show this week which was a nice change of pace last week. We’re finally getting close to the end of the build to Slamboree which has gone on way too long now. I believe Hogan is back tonight which will help a lot with the levels of interest on these shows. If nothing else the main event is better than Mongo vs. Barbarian. Let’s get to it.

We open with Flair, Piper and Greene at the announce table but there’s a banner that says “Tradition Bites! NWO 4 Life!” behind them. They freak out before they say anything and we go to the opening sequence.

Back with the three guys in the ring and there’s another paper drop like last week. Piper goes on a rant about last week and the 75% of the gate demands the NWO made. He doesn’t carry a purse so that’s fine with him. JJ comes out and says the NWO is getting 75% and Piper has to deal with it. Didn’t Piper just say it’s ok with him? JJ leaves and Flair says he’ll be ready in Charlotte. There won’t be a single pothole in the road.

Public Enemy vs. Konnan/Hugh Morrus

Public Enemy’s music started while Flair, Piper and Greene were still in the ring and Flair walked past them as they came out. Are they in a time crunch or something? Both teams bring out tables and it’s a brawl to start. They almost immediately head to the floor and Jimmy Hart is put on the table but Konnan makes a last second save. Public Enemy loads up two tables on top of each other and Grunge dives through both, but Konnan was pulled out before the collision.

After all that, it’s time for an actual match to start. Rocco hits a standing moonsault onto both guys for two but Konnan powerbombs him down. There’s a table set up in the middle of the ring but as Rock goes up to splash Konnan through it, Morrus superplexes him through Konnan through the table. Even though Rock is on top of Konnan, Morrus covers Rock for the pin.

Rating: D. I was tempted to not rate this but it was long enough. I have no idea how this wasn’t a DQ in there somewhere but even though it wasn’t, the match was still a mess with a confusing ending. I guess the idea was to fire up the crowd, or to just copy ECW, but either way it was a big mess and it didn’t make a ton of sense.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Syxx

Hall, Nash and Syxx come out in jeans. Rey is looking around and Syxx gets in a spin kick to start. The Bronco Buster is countered by a kick and the Outsiders come in. Hall gets in a shot to the back and hits the Outsiders Edge. Syxx wins with the Buzz Killer in about a minute. How bad are the referees tonight? Somehow he didn’t notice the two huge men in the ring at the same time?

JJ and Nick Patrick come out to break the hold but the NWO comes out as well. Eric tells JJ to get out of here because JJ has no power. Good grief what is the point in JJ even existing if they’re just going to flat out tell us he has no authority? Syxx yells about McMahon because that’s edgy.

Lee Marshall does his road report.

Here are Hogan and Bischoff with something to say. Hogan runs his mouth about the Wolfpac and calls out Sting but no one answers. That’s all from Hollywood at the moment.

Steven Regal vs. Meng

This is fallout from Regal trying to help Benoit from getting beaten down last week. They go at it immediately and sweet goodness are they going at it. Meng pounds Regal down in the corner but Regal fires right back with punches that stagger the monster back. Not that it matters as here’s Kevin Sullivan, who Regal goes after for the DQ. This lasted about 40 seconds but there was more action in it than most matches you’ll see on Raw in a given week.

Meng puts Regal in the Tongan Death Grip post match. Sullivan gets him to drop it and Regal starts beating on them again. The Death Grip stops him cold. Regal looked awesome here.

Video on DDP vs. Savage.

Here are Page and Kimberly. Kimberly looks great in a white dress, even though she stumbles down the ramp. Page talks about being in a lot of bar fights over the years, but none of them were as bad as the one at Spring Stampede. Kimberly refutes Savage’s statements that she loves him, but here’s Savage in the crowd. He tells Kim to stop calling him and that’s about it.

Alex Wright vs. Jeff Jarrett

Jeff immediately armdrags him down and struts before we go to some chain wrestling. A swinging neckbreaker puts Wright down and Jeff hits the running hip attack while Wright is in 619 position. Wright comes back with aggression but then stops to dance. Debra’s distraction lets Jarrett chop block Wright and the figure four ends this fast.

Time for NASCAR stuff. There’s an announcement coming in two weeks regarding WCW and NASCAR. Oh joy.

Glacier vs. Lizmark Jr.

Superkick, Lizmark is pinned, 17 seconds.

Post match James Vandenberg (James Mitchell of TNA fame), Mortis and Wrath come out for the big heel beating.

Harlem Heat vs. Lex Luger/The Giant

Apparently Luger was injured in Japan by the NWO so it’s Giant on his own. Giant says he has a partner to replace Luger though.

Diamond Dallas Page/The Giant vs. Harlem Heat

Savage pops up as Page comes out but Page steals a crutch from him. Hogan jumps Page from behind with the other crutch and Page is in trouble. The NWO comes out to beat on Page. Where is Giant? Oh he’s in the ring getting ganged up on by the NWO. Flair and Greene come out as well but get beaten down. Piper comes in once everyone else is down and is promptly beaten as well. Hogan runs his mouth to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Nitro is in a bad stage at this point as the shows aren’t really good or bad but rather just kind of there. The star power helped a lot here as this felt like stuff that actually mattered. The problem with that is it’s the same stuff we’ve seen time after time. JJ continues to mean nothing at all which would be the case for a good while to come. The NWO stuff is back to what it used to be, which is to say that it’s repetitive. Nothing of note would really change until August, and even that was just for five days. The show being an hour was a big help here though, as two hours would be too much.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my book on the History of the WWE Championship from Amazon for just $5 at:

Mayhem 1999
Date: November 21, 1999
Location: Air Canada Center, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 13,839
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

 

Since TNA is stupid and had two Final Resolutions in 2008, you get this until I can find a copy. This is WCW Canadian PPV debut so the main event is a tournament final of Benoit vs. Hart for the world title. The title was vacated this time because WCW decided to have the world champion’s (Sting) opponent (Hogan) at Halloween Havoc lay down for him and then have Goldberg squash Sting so the title was vacated and we got a tournament. That’s Russo for you. Let’s get to it.

 

The opening video is about the final four in the tournament: Hart, Benoit, Sting and Jarrett.

 

Oh and this show is named after a video game, not vice versa.

 

We have a double main event: the tournament final and Sid vs. Goldberg in an I Quit match.

 

The fans want Flair as Tony and Bobby run down the card. Why we need to hear this is beyond me but I guess it makes sense to the bosses.

 

WCW World Title Tournament Semi-Final: Chris Benoit vs. Jeff Jarrett

 

Jarrett takes him down to start and slaps him in the back of the head which ends badly for him. Benoit busts out a tornado DDT for two. Neckbreaker gets the same as Benoit is trying for as many pins as he can get. Superplex hits for two as well. This is all within the first 90 seconds. I’m not skipping a bunch of stuff. Out to the floor and Benoit chops away. A chop misses and Jarrett crotches Benoit against the post to finally slow him down.

 

Back inside and a powerslam gets two for Jeff. They hit a pinfall reversal sequence. This is faster and more crisp than anything I can remember in WCW in years. Jeff grabs a sleeper and Benoit is in trouble. He escapes but Jeff gets it again. This time Benoit hits a jawbreaker and both guys are down. The Canadian hits some Germans on the American and here comes Creative Control (Harris Brothers as the muscle of the Powers That Be).

 

Benoit is sent to the floor but Jeff doesn’t want the win by countout. That’s strangely galant of him. A top rope cross body is rolled through for two for Benoit and when he sits on a Jarrett sunset flip he gets the same result. Belly to back sets up the swan dive but Creative Control pulls Benoit out. The other member beats Benoit down to huge boos. There’s the Stroke but Dustin Rhodes comes out to break up the pin and beats up Creative Control. There’s the guitar but Benoit gets it and clocks Jarrett (totally against his character) to go to the finals.

 

Rating: B-. This was on the path to being a great match but then it’s Russo booking a big time match and therefore we must have three run-ins and a weapon shot. When have you ever seen a face Benoit use a weapon? The opening part of this was GREAT though and if they had kept that up for the entire match it would have been an easy A.

 

JJ and CC beat down Benoit post match to MONSTER heat.

 

Disco says he respects his Cruiserweight Title and the $25,000 he can win doesn’t mean as much as the belt. Jarrett and Creative Control pop up to beat him down too.

 

Cruiserweight Title: Evan Karagis vs. Disco Inferno

 

Title vs. money here. Wait both guys have put up money meaning Evan can win the title and money while Disco can only win the money. That’s not exactly fair. Evan also has Madusa with him. Disco has some issues getting to the ring due to the beating. Tony Marinara (Tony Mamaluke from ECW) is with him as his inspiration/lackey. Evan jumps him in the aisle and we start up in the aisle for a bit.

 

Marinara sits in on commentary. He’s very annoying so far and is talking about how Disco owes him money or something which would go on for about a year and never went anywhere. It did bring in the Mamalukes though. Disco fires away with some kicks in the corner that are so hard Evan is falling down before they hit. The champ hits a pair of suplexes and dances.

 

Evan gets two off a crucifix but is taken down by a clothesline. This is a pretty bland match so far. Marinara is getting more annoying with every word he says. A middle rope elbow gets two for Disco. Madusa picks up Evan on the floor and the power of looks is enough to inspire him to dropkick Disco as he jumps off the apron at him.

 

Powerslam gets two for Karagis. The announcers debate what the belt is worth with the value stretching from $150 to 50 grand. There’s a LOUD boring chant as Disco hits a DDT. Marinara gets up to hit on Madusa and the distraction causes Disco to grab a chair and put it upside Tony’s head. A springboard cross body gives Karagis the title which he would lose to Madusa.

 

Rating: D. This was a terribly dull match with neither guy being interesting at all. They just kind of did moves to each other for 8 minutes. I don’t think anyone knew who Marinara was and I don’t think anyone really cared. Disco was best served as a comedy act but instead they made him a champion because the other Cruiserweights actually had something to do. Bad match.

 

Bret is just getting here.

 

The Powers That Be (Russo with his face not being seen), yells at Jarrett and says he has to fix it tonight. Jeff says he’ll do it.

 

Norman Smiley says he’s ready to become Hardcore Champion and is scared by construction going on.

 

Hardcore Title: Brian Knobs vs. Norman Smiley

 

This is a tournament final to determine the first champion. Smiley comes out in a Maple Leafs jersey. The Hardcore Title is the exact same shape as the ECW World Title. Knobs takes over to start with some weapon shots. He’s in an old school Nasty Boys shirt while Norman is in full hockey gear minus the helmet. A middle rope trashcan shot misses so Norman cracks him in the head with it.

 

Norman gets the hockey stick and Tony tries to sound like he knows something about hockey. The Big Wiggle is broken up and there go the shin guards. Why are wrestlers so obsessed with taking opponents’ clothes off? Jimmy Hart jumps on Norman’s back and Norman gets to have his one instance of physical dominance. They head to the back with Knobs hitting him in the head and Norman stumbles back to the entrance.

 

There’s a camera waiting on them and Norman gets in a chair shot to the ribs. It’s your usual hardcore match from the late 90s meaning there’s a table set up with Norman going head first into it. Knobs goes into a bunch of boxes which are empty. He screams anyway because he’s Screamin Norman Smiley. They get to the food stuff and not yet prepared food is tossed around. They fight into an elevator and the door shuts. Jimmy opens it up but when he swings the trashcan it hits Knobs and Norman gets the pin and the title. Yes, Jimmy Hart just physically ended a match.

 

Rating: D+. It’s a hardcore match from the late 90s. The problem is that it’s Brian Knobs in there instead of someone that means something anymore. In WWF this would have been people like Al Snow or Road Dogg, as in people still relevant at the time. This wasn’t anything of note and is the same match you would see a dozen times over the next year on PPV.

 

Post match Jimmy is thrown into some hamburger buns.

 

We recap the Revolution vs. the Filthy Animals. It’s your usual stable gang warfare. There was a pole match involving getting Torrie out of a cage. There was a moment where Rey (Animals) was hung by the leg from the top of a cage and they destroyed his knee so he’s not in this.

 

The Revolution talks about what if’s and Saturn goes into a rant about dinosaurs.

 

The Animals say they’ll win and they’re not worried.

 

Disco talks to Tony Marinara and Tony says he’s going to get his boys.

 

Jarrett has what looks to be a 2×4 and is going to look for someone.

 

Filthy Animals vs. Revolution

 

This is an elimination match. It’s Eddie/Kidman/Asya (Chyna ripoff) vs. Torrie/Saturn/Malenko. Shane Douglas of the Revolution is on commentary. Eddie and Kidman clean house as they’re trying to keep Torrie (a spry 24 here and drop dead gorgeous) out of the ring. We start officially with Eddie vs. Dean which works almost every time. They head to the floor so Saturn takes them out with an Asai moonsautl. Kidman dives on them too and then Torrie sets for one. Asya gets her hands on Torrie and it turns into something like a catfight.

 

Kidman plants Asya with a Sky High as Torrie has a bad ankle. Eddie shoves Kidman into Malenko as he’s checking on Torrie but it lets Malenko roll Kidman up for the first elimination. Eddie is destroyed by Malenko and Saturn, taking a backbreaker/knee drop combo. Asya comes in and beats on Eddie a bit, hitting an eye popping Davey Boy Smith delayed vertical for two.

 

Back to Eddie vs. Dean with Dean in control via a suplex. Eddie gets out of it and hits a standing rana for a pin to eliminate Dean and get us down to Eddie/Torrie vs. Saturn/Asya with Torrie having an injured ankle still. Asya comes in and beats on Eddie with another suplex getting two. Saturn accidentally superkicks Asya and a frog splash makes it 2-1 with Saturn vs. Torrie/Eddie.

 

It’s so weird thinking of Eddie as a Filthy Animal when he left as one of the Radicalz with a lot of the Revolution in two months. Saturn hooks a sleeper hold on Eddie but a jawbreaker gets him out of it. Scratch that as he’s right back in it. Now Eddie puts a sleeper on Saturn. Why do people that just easily escaped a sleeper think it’s such a good move to use immediately afterwords?

 

Saturn tries a spinning springboard clothesline but Eddie steps to the side and dropkicks him down. Something like a tornado DDT gets two. Eddie jumps into a Death Valley Driver for two. Shane is losing it on commentary and is more entertaining than anything I’ve ever heard him say or do. Saturn misses a top rope elbow so Eddie tries the same move he got rid of Dean with but it only gets two. Eddie tries a top rope cross body but Saturn rolls through into the Rings of Saturn to give us Saturn vs. Torrie. Torrie kicks him low and Shane gets on the apron. Saturn hits Torrie low which gets him the pin for the win.

 

Rating: C-. Not bad but I really don’t get the idea of having the girls in there. This would have been a lot better if they just had a tag match with the four guys or maybe threw in another dude to fight Asya. There wasn’t anything great here and the ending was really pretty stupid. I can think of worse ways to kill ten minutes though.

 

Jeff and Creative Control are beating up Buff Bagwell now.

 

Curt Hennig vs. Buff Bagwell

 

This is a career vs. career match and the video package during Curt’s entrance doesn’t really do much of a good job of explaining why that’s the stipulation. There’s no Bagwell due to the beating so here are Jarrett and CC. Hennig tries to fight them off but he’s outnumbered. Here’s Bagwell who is fine and has a 2×4. He runs off the heels who have been in about 5 scenes tonight and the match begins.

 

Hennig controls early and we head to the floor with Bagwell going into the railing a few times. As they’re getting back in though Hennig is shoved off the apron and into the railing himself. And he still managed to do it perfectly. This is far closer to a brawl than a match which is Russo 101. Hennig is a lot more popular because he’s talented and old school while Bagwell is more or less a douche.

 

Off to a sleeper (popular move tonight) by Hennig which goes on for a long time. Buff fires off some punches and dances a lot but the fans do not care at all. Why would you think that in an old WWF town in a country that takes wrestling seriously that fans would want to see that dancing stuff? Not that it matters as Hennig controls 80% of the match but walks into a Blockbuster that is as out of nowhere as it sounds to make Hennig “retire”.

 

Rating: D. What a boring match this was. The fans were all over Bagwell who was the face in this I think and they gave Hennig a standing ovation after the loss. The match was awful, primarily because Bagwell wasn’t any good at making people care or being able to have an interesting match. He had a good finisher and a good body and that’s it. Hennig would unretire the next night and had his next televised match in 8 days.

 

Sting, the heel in his match against Bret, says he should be champion because he never lost the title. It’s Showtime.

 

WCW World Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Bret Hart vs. Sting

 

Sting is in a t-shirt and tights and has big hair. Feeling out process to start and they stare each other down a lot. Bret slugs away and the fans pop HARD. They brawl to the floor because Bret Hart is incapable of having a wrestling match in a ring right? Sting wrestles like a heel, raking Bret’s eyes to break his momentum. This is a very interesting thing to see as Sting is wrestling as a heel in front of a crowd that believes him to be a heel. This has happened all of maybe twice ever.

 

Bret gets in a single shot to take over and the crowd explodes. Sting kicks him in the little maple leafs and actually hits the big elbow for two. They go to the floor again and Bret is sent into the announce table. The Stinger Splash onto the table misses and we head back inside. The referee goes down and here’s Lex with a ball bat to beat up Sting. Bret beats up Luger and puts him in the Sharpshooter which somehow gives Bret a DQ win. Bret doesn’t want it that way but he’s stuck with it.

 

Scratch that he’s not stuck with it as Bret demands we keep going so we keep going. Bret goes off on Sting with the original Five Moves of Doom including the Canadian hitting a Russian on the American. The elbow is blocked by a boot to the chin and Sting limps into the Scorpion which he has some torque on for once. Bret counters that into the Sharpshooter and Bret is in the Finals.

 

Rating: D+. This match right here sums up Vince Russo’s issues in a nutshell. Sting was past his prime at this point and Bret wasn’t great but he still could have a decent match in the ten minutes they had here. Did we need the run-in and the ball bat? No, we didn’t. The ending they did here could have worked fine and would have made a good ending kind of like his Summerslam 91 match. However, Vince Russo says no that’s not a good idea and we need to have people running in and weapon shots because I guess the fans can’t enjoy wrestling. That’s Russo in a nutshell: he had no faith in actual wrestling.

 

Sting calls Bret back in for a handshake post match.

 

Benoit says it’s an honor to wrestle Bret again here and he’ll test the Best There Is/Was/Ever Will Be moniker.

 

Luger is already in a neck brace and says it’ll be a permanent thing. He can’t wrestle tonight either so he’ll pay the fans something for an apology. The details aren’t really clear.

 

Vampiro vs. Berlyn

 

This is a collar match and Vampiro has Jerry Only of the band the Misfits with him. Berlyn is Alex Wright in something resembling a Neo-Nazi deal. It was rather weird to say the least. Dr. Death Steve Williams and Oklahoma, one of the creative writers making fun of JR. Immediately Berlyn hits the referee. Vampy kicks Berlyn and Wall hits Vampiro. A second referee comes down as Wall beats up Vampiro and Berlyn is on the floor.

 

Wall misses a big boot and gets crotched as Berlyn beats up Jerry Only. Oklahoma’s impression of JR is pretty good. I think the match has started now but I’m not sure. Oklahoma makes up a bunch of football stats for the three guys as Wall hits a HUGE chokeslam and is tied to Vampiro now. Berlyn yells at the Wall who takes the collar off.

 

I have no idea what the point of this is or if the bell ever rant in the first place. Oklahoma: “This Berlyn is tougher than Chinese algebra.” Wall walks out and Vampiro hits a release superplex. Only (not a wrestler) comes in for the double team and The Nail in the Coffin (Michinoku Driver) sets up a camel clutch with the chain for the pin.

 

Rating: N/A. The bell never rang so I don’t think this was an actual match. As for the match, I have no idea why it’s on the card as Vampy and Berlyn were ever chained together at any time. It wasn’t a good match or anything either as Wall was the one out there doing most of the work while a singer that most people probably didn’t know was beaten up. I don’t get the point of this at all.

 

Steve Williams comes in and beats down both guys post match. So THAT was the point of it.

 

Scott Hall (POP) talks about Rick Steiner not being here for the title vs. title match. Hall is the new TV Champion because Steiner can’t defend it. He was already the US Champion. Hall issues an open challenge for later.

 

Hennnig is leaving and is congratulated by some guys as he leaves.

 

Kimberly is here, an hour and thirty five minutes into the show.

 

Meng vs. Total Package

 

Luger is the Package for those of you uninitiated. He’s in the neck collar and hasn’t been wanting to wrestle at all lately so this is a continuation of that story. Luger gets his shirt ripped off quickly and there go the pants too. Again, WHAT IS WITH THE RIPPING OFF OF MEN’S CLOTHING??? Luger goes to the eyes and manages to suplex Meng despite having a bad neck. The suplex isn’t sold either so we’ll call it even.

 

They go outside for a bit and Luger hammers away as they come back in. Meng tries the Tongan Death Grip but he can’t get past the neck brace. Instead he steps on the throat while we talk about the main event. Powerslam gets two for Lex. He rams Meng’s head into the buckle. I guess when they say Total Package that doesn’t include intelligence as YOU DON’T HIT A SAMOAN IN THE HEAD. Meng starts his comeback as this is going in slow motion. Liz has some spray or something but it hits Luger instead. Meng takes the brace off and the Death Grip ends it.

 

Rating: D. In other words, Liz was Jimmy Hart, Luger was Brian Knobs and Meng was Norman Smiley. I’ll give Russo this: I’ve seen him go shorter than this between using the same style of an ending. This was another match where I have no idea what the point of this being on the PPV was but I’m sure it made sense at the time. I’m not being serious with that last line but I thought I’d try being nice for a change.

 

Bret says he’ll win and Luger walks behind him ranting about his loss. Bret doesn’t stop talking.

 

David Flair is “polishing his crowbar” for his time where he’ll try to hold Kimberly down against her will later or make her scream about how she can’t take it anymore.

 

US Title/TV Title: Scott Hall vs. ???

 

Booker T accepts the challenge. Hall is so over it’s incredible. Since it was more newsworthy when he was sober than the other way around though, that would never result in a world title run. He says Nash is coming and they’re going to have a party later. Hall rams his shoulders into Booker for that signature spot of his. Booker fires off a hook kick and is booed during the cover.

 

Side slam gets two. Hall gets knocked to the floor but comes back with a chokeslam for two. Much like any other match with it being thrown together on the fly like this, there’s not much to it because there’s no story or hatred to it. Fallaway slam puts Booker down and we go to the floor again. Off to a sleeper as the fans are looking at something to the right of the ring. Here are Jarrett and Creative Control AGAIN. They go after Booker, he fights them off, Booker gets caught in the Outsider’s Edge and Hall retains.

 

Rating: D+. Again, WHAT WAS THE POINT??? In this case I’m talking about the run-in. This is what, the third match they’ve been involved with? We get it: he’s trying to disrupt things. Can we please have a match that ends cleanly? Is it that much to ask? Oh wait Russo is running things SO OF COURSE IT IS. This gets really frustrating after awhile.

 

Midnight, the black Chyna ripoff, makes the save for the post match beatdown.

 

Lex can’t find Liz.

 

We recap Kimberly vs. David Flair. She wanted to sleep with David Flair but got Ric instead. David went insane because of it and wanted to beat her for some reason. I still don’t get the point of this.

 

Kimberly vs. David Flair

 

Let’s get this over with. She does look good at least. Kimberly stretches a lot to try to distract David. Within thirty seconds, Flair is kicked low (no effect) and the referee is shoved. David gets the crowbar and she gets on her knees in front of him. Crowd: “SUCK IT SUCK IT SUCK IT!” She reaches for his crotch and pulls his cup out so she can kick him in the balls. The fans are dead.

 

David picks up the crowbar but Kanyon comes out to beat him up. Now here’s DDP to hit the Diamond Cutter on David. His ribs are killing him though. DDP gets the crowbar but Arn Anderson comes out and takes the bar away from him. David hits Arn with the crowbar and leaves, I guess ending this.

 

Rating: N/A. Get me a wrestling match and I’ll rate it. Kimberly looked great.

 

Arn is taken out on a stretcher to fill in some time.

 

We recap Sid vs. Goldberg which is part of Sid’s Millennium Man deal where he was going to break Goldberg’s record for a win streak which turned into a comedy deal where chokeslamming people counted as wins and all that jazz. They kept having big brawls and the Streak might have been broken. It’s not mentioned but who cares about stuff like that I suppose.

 

Sid says he’ll never say I Quit. It’s an I Quit match if that wasn’t mentioned.

 

Sid Vicious vs. Goldberg

 

Sid jumps him during the entrance and the piped in chants begin. You can tell as no one is moving yet everyone is chanting. Sid is knocked to the floor and they slug it out again. Sid is WAY over and there’s a cobra clutch slam to Goldberg. Another cobra clutch slam sets up a chokeslam and make that a pair of them. Goldberg counters a choke into a cross armbreaker and is booed out of the building. Back to the arm and Goldberg isn’t sure what to do. Off to something resembling a cobra clutch and Sid is out cold in maybe 20 seconds to end it minus saying I Quit.

 

Rating: F. Well let’s see. In an I Quit match between two monsters, it was a standard Goldberg match with a sloppy looking hold to end it. What was the point of this? I know I’ve asked that a lot tonight but that’s what I leave most of these matches asking: what did that happen for? Nothing match and it does little for either guy.

 

Lex blames Liz for the loss and threatens her despite not being able to find her.

 

WCW World Title: Bret Hart vs. Chris Benoit

 

Long feeling out process that leads to Bret hooking an armbar. The fans are for Bret but they’re not against Benoit if that makes sense. Benoit tries a comeback with various strikes but a sunset flip is rolled through into a Sharpshooter attempt. Benoit avoids that into a Crossface attempt but Bret grabs the rope. They’re still cool though and have a handshake.

 

Bret throws him to the floor and a fan jumps out of the crowd in a hockey jersey and face paint to beat up Benoit. It’s Malenko so Bret beats up him and mark run-in #1 since Bret Hart vs. Chris Benoit in Canada with over 15 minutes isn’t enough to have a good match right? Benoit fights back with more basic stuff like a backdrop. Bret might have bad ribs so Benoit starts firing off the suplexes.

 

A tombstone looks to set up the swan dive which hits but here’s Scott Hall to take out the referee. Nash is here too with a chair but here’s Goldberg to fight them off. Hall and Hart fight up the aisle as Benoit is down. The Outsiders leave and we have a second referee. Goldberg jumps the Outsiders and beats them to the back as Benoit starts in on Bret’s knee. Since the world title match isn’t important enough we go split screen to see the Outsiders get pulled off Goldberg.

 

Ok NOW we can get into the title match, 12 minutes into it. Benoit hooks on the figure four and Bret’s knee has been worked over. Bret grabs the rope and goes to a comeback, hitting a backbreaker for two. A top rope superplex hits and both guys are down. Benoit’s back is getting messed up quickly here which means it’s Sharpshooter time soon. Benoit falls on top of Bret in a slam for two and goes to the outside to try to clear his head. He counters a suplex back in and hits the Rolling Germans. He goes for the Crossface but Bret rolls out. Bret grabs the legs into the Sharpshooter and Bret wins the title.

 

Rating: C+. Pretty good match but the run-ins crippled it just like the rest of the matches tonight. I mean seriously, you have two of the best ever out of Canada and this is what you decide to do to them? The match was kind of a mess on top of that as different parts were worked on until the ending where Bret picked the back which made sense. It’s a good match but it was running with an anchor.

 

Tony calls this “just another chapter in Bret’s career.” Nice way to sell this as a huge moment.

 

Overall Rating: D. I have no idea what they were going for here. The CONSTANT run-ins aren’t redeemed by a long and fairly good main event. How many times have you heard that about Impact in the past say two years? Two matches, as in the main event and the elimination tag are over ten minutes long. The idea is to have short matches on TV to set up the long ones on PPV. Russo never quite gets that, but there are a lot of things he doesn’t get. Nothing to see here for the most part.

 

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Monday Nitro #118
Date: December 15, 1997
Location: Independence Arena, Charlotte, North Carolina
Attendance: 9,320
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Larry Zbyszko

We’re really getting close to Starrcade now with just two more Nitros to go before the biggest show in the company’s history. The majority of the big matches are set for the show now so we’re just finalizing things now before the pay per view. I’m not sure if we’re going to hear the rest of the card before then but it could go either way. Let’s get to it.

Apparently Bret Hart is here tonight. Cool. It’s also a three hour show. Not cool.

Here’s the NWO and they immediately look under the ring for Sting. Vincent looks into the rafters with binoculars in a bit that shouldn’t be as funny as it is. With the inspection out of the way, Bischoff introduces Chono who presumably talks trash in Japanese. Hennig says this is NWO country and he’s the best thing the NWO has ever produced. Hogan calls Sting a coward and says Sting will never come face him one on one. They were a bit more concise tonight.

Vincent vs. Ray Traylor

As soon as the bell rings Vincent walks into a spinebuster followed by a splash in the corner. The Flock arrives. A belly to back suplex puts Vincent down and the Boss Man Slam (now called Traylor Trash) ends this in a hurry.

Traylor wants to know where the NWO is. Based on what happened on Saturday Night, apparently they’re in a six man tag against him and the Steiners. Makes enough sense.

We see Flair’s comments from last week about how he’s the real best there is, was and ever will be.

Video on Nash vs. Giant for Starrcade.

The Nitro Girls dance at the announce table.

TV Title: Disco Inferno vs. Yuji Nagata

Disco is defending. Nagata starts firing off some kicks as Larry goes onto a BIG rant about how this town was built on the backs of various legends like Flair, Rhodes, Magnum and himself. The idea of grouping Larry with those men is hilarious. Anyway Disco pounds away but Sonny Onoo’s distraction lets Nagata suplex him down for two. A rolling Liger Kick puts Disco down and some shots to the throat have Disco in a lot of trouble.

Nagata gets two off a forearm to the face but walks into an atomic drop. A knee lift gets two for Disco as does a gordbuster. Sonny tries to interfere but gets caught in a Chartbuster (Stunner), followed by a Stun Gun and Chartbuster to Nagata to complete the Steve Austin Special and retain Disco’s title.

Rating: C. Not bad here as Disco’s on and off push continues. For a guy who was nothing but a comedy character when he started out, he had some serious success over the years. The match was nothing to see here but Disco looked confident and like someone who belonged a bit higher up on the card.

Fit Finlay vs. Dean Malenko

Eddie is on commentary again here. Dean stares him down during the entrances as Tony thinks that’s a challenge. Malenko takes Finlay down by the arm but gets caught in a quick headlock. A slam gets two on Dean and it’s off to a nerve hold. Dean fights up as Eddie calls Dean a very boring person. That’s the understatement of the century. Dean snapmares him down and puts on a chinlock with a knee in the back.

We hear about a tag match Eddie and Dean were in a few weeks back with Eddie ranting about how the people wanted to see the Frog Splash and not the Texas Cloverleaf. Finlay fights back with some forearms to the face but Dean whips him into the barricade. Back in and Dean can’t powerbomb him as Finlay kicks him in the forehead. Eddie: “Dean looked like his wife told him they were going to have twins.”

Finlay hits the rolling fireman’s carry senton for two but Dean comes back with a rolling cradle for two. Eddie leaves the broadcast booth, thereby taking away the most entertaining part of the match. Guerrero heads to ringside and distracts Dean out of the tiger bomb. Finlay tombstones Dean down for the pin.

Rating: C. Decent match here with hilarious commentary from Eddie. As far as I can tell the Cruiserweight Title match isn’t set yet for the PPV but you can tell it’s coming. Either way it’s a very entertaining feud and the match is bound to be a fun one. Finlay continues to be that kind of veteran you can put in this spot and get a decent match out of him, which is very valuable.

Video on the NWO beating up Roddy Piper, who hasn’t been around in months.

La Parka/Psychosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr./Juventud Guerrera

La Parka is in yellow for some reason here. Juvy and Psychosis start things off with Guerrera hitting a top rope rana to take over early. A standing version does the same but La Parka kicks him in the back of the head to slow Juvy down. Apparently this is under Lucha Rules, meaning going to the floor is the same as a tag. Psychosis hits a guillotine legdrop followed by a belly to belly for two on Guerrera. La Parka powerbombs him down for two more as we’re actually getting the tag formula out of this.

Psychosis goes up but accidentally dropkicks La Parka. That’s not enough for a tag again though as Psychosis pops up and decks Rey to keep Juvy in trouble. La Parka misses a splash in the corner and it’s finally hot tag to Rey, although the announcers would rather talk about Bischoff. Rey ducks under both guys, allowing Juvy to hit a springboard cross body. Everything breaks down and the heels are both kicked to the floor, allowing Rey and Juvy to hit stereo flip dives to take them out.

Back in and Juvy hits what the Hardys would call Poetry in Motion for two on Psychosis. La Parka is sent into Psychosis before Rey is launched into a rana for two on the guy in yellow. Juvy and Psychosis go on top with Psychosis trying a slam off the top, only to be turned into a kind of small package off the top for two for Juvy. Guerrera gets crotched while loading up a Doomsday Device but Rey hits a springboard hurricanrana to the floor to take out La Parka. The 450 from Juvy is enough to end Psychosis.

Rating: B. Take four guys, let them go nuts for seven minutes, listen to the crowd cheer a lot. It worked for the six man matches and it worked here in the four man version. Mysterio and Guerrera worked pretty well together although I don’t remember them teaming up all that much over the years until a bit at the end of WCW.

Here’s Doug Dillinger who apparently used to be a Charlotte cop. They bring out Arn Anderson to a BIG ovation. Anderson calls this place his home and says that the fans deserve to see Ric Flair, so here’s Naitch. Flair says that Anderson is about to make him cry but there are more important things to deal with at the moment. Apparently there was a fund set up today for fallen Charlotte cops and WCW has donated $15,000 to it to start. That’s rather cool. Flair presents them with a check, but now it’s time to talk about Hennig. There goes Flair’s coat and he wants Hennig tonight, because the NWO can’t beat him in Charlotte.

JJ comes out to talk about the stipulations Bischoff wants. Eric shows up and says he wants punches and kicks to be legal. JJ says that’s fine as long as submissions count. I know WCW had some weird rules at times but I’m pretty sure submissions have always counted.

Nitro Girls.

Here’s Hall for a match but first of all we need the survey. For once, the fans are solidly WCW.

Scott Hall vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho grabs a pair of quick rollups for two each and the Lionsault hits for two more. Jericho dives into the fallaway slam though and Hall takes over. Hall counters a hiptoss and hits a BIG chokeslam for no cover. After doing the Giant imitation it’s the Outsider’s Edge and we’re done quick.

Heenan comes in on commentary.

Meng vs. Steve McMichael

There’s no Mongo so we cut to the back and McMichael is out cold with Goldberg standing over him. JJ comes up to yell at him and Goldberg volunteers to go fight Meng. As he comes to the ring though, Mongo pops up and a brawl breaks out.

Tag Titles: Scott Norton/Konnan vs. Steiner Brothers

Blast it with the two Scotts. For the sake of simplicity, Scott Steiner is Scott and Scott Norton is Norton. The Steiners clear the ring early on so let’s talk about Bret Hart. Konnan starts with Scott and is gorilla pressed with ease. A belly to belly sends Konnan into the corner and it’s off to Rick vs. Norton. Norton charges into a boot in the corner but comes back with a big clothesline to take Rick down.

Rick nails a Steiner line of his own and goes up top for a top rope clothesline for two. He goes up again but pulls a Flair and is slammed down by Norton. After some interference from Konnan, Norton’s shoulder breaker is good for two. Off to Konnan who walks into a belly to back suplex as everything breaks down. Scott comes back in to load up the Frankensteiner but Vincent runs in for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Another not great match with another run in ending. For some reason this doesn’t surprise me in the least anymore and it’s already getting tiresome. Do we really need to protect Norton and Konnan from the tag team champions/ Oh wait Vincent already lost tonight so we can’t have another NWO pinfall loss, because then people would stop viewing them as a threat. Or something like that I guess.

Booker T vs. Randy Savage

Stevie was either about to be injured or already was injured so Booker’s singles push is on the verge of happening soon. Booker is in regular tights now and not the traditional Harlem Heat attire. He takes Savage down in a hurry and cranks on the arm but Savage comes back with right hands in the corner. Booker knocks him to the floor and then into the front row, only to throw him back into the ring a few seconds later.

Back in and Booker spends too much time posing but manages to slam Savage down. An elbow misses but Booker spins up and hits the Harlem side kick. Savage rolls to the floor as this is one sided so far. Booker misses a splash onto the barricade and momentum shifts in a hurry. After dropping Booker chest first onto the barricade, Savage throws him back inside for two.

A fan tries to get in but Savage drills him in the head. Booker spins kicks him down and Savage accidentally bumps the referee. The ax kick hits Savage but Liz breaks up the missile dropkick, allowing Savage to knock Booker to the floor. A chair shot to Booker’s head allows the big elbow to end Mr. T.

Rating: C+. This was a good solid rub for the single Booker as he beat up Savage for a good four minutes out there. Savage winning was fine though as Booker was nowhere near ready to be a real threat to him yet. Liz getting involved was always strange to see given how meek she was back in the WWF. This is on Best of Nitro Volume 2 I believe.

Chris Benoit vs. Riggs

Again this was supposed to be Raven but it’s another substitution. Benoit goes to look for Raven but gets jumped by Riggs instead. Back inside and Benoit gets up an elbow before firing off those hard chops. Benoit’s eyes look awesome here. Chris drapes him stomach first across the top rope before headbutting him down on the mat. As in Riggs is on the mat and Benoit leans down to headbutt him.

A chop sends Riggs to the floor again but he gets in a shot on Benoit to take over. The fans are firmly behind Benoit as he gets his knees up to block a Riggs splash back inside. A front suplex puts Riggs down and there’s the Swan Dive into the Crossface for the submission. He snapped that hold on very fast and it looked sweet.

Rating: C+. This story is growing on me and the match that would result would be amazing. This feud should have elevated Benoit WAY up the ladder but of course he would be back down in the middle of the card after it was done because of various factors we’ll get to later. Good performance from Benoit here.

Post match Benoit yells at the Flock before diving on them, only to get beaten down and put in the Rings of Saturn.

Here’s JJ again to talk to Bischoff, this time about who is referee. They go back and forth between WCW referees and NWO guys with Dillon eventually agreeing to it being an NWO guy as long as he gets to pick which one. Cue Bret Hart who says he’d be honored to be referee, so Bischoff says $7.5 million. Hart says he knows what it’s like to be screwed by a referee before turning around to show a Hart Foundation jacket and leaving. To clarify, about a month after the Montreal Screwjob, the hottest name in wrestling is going to be a referee in a match between Eric Bischoff and Larry Zbyszko. Let that sink in for a minute.

Post break Gene calls out Lex Luger but gets Bagwell instead. Bagwell says Luger can’t beat him so here’s Luger, saying that he was in the production truck asking for a match with Bagwell. Buff gives about five excuses but after a slap we’re ready to go.

Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger

Luger runs Buff over to start and backdrops him down. A few clotheslines put Bagwell down again before Lex stomps away. Back up and Lex misses a charge into the corner so Bagwell can stomp away a bit as well. Luger easily fights back and hits his usual clotheslines and powerslam, but here are Norton and Vincent…..not for the DQ. Luger fights them off and clotheslines Bagwell to the floor and that’s the DQ. Oh they’re trying to trick us with the DQ’s now. Match was nothing.

Ric Flair vs. Curt Hennig

Before Flair comes out Hennig challenges anyone in the audience to come fight him. He goes on and on for a bit about how he’s the US Champion and all that jazz while insulting Flair. After a break here’s Ric for the fight….and here’s Hall for the DQ maybe ten seconds later. So much for that idea.

Flair manages to fight off the NWO for a bit but Hennig takes him down and puts him in the Figure Four. DDP, Luger and the Steiners come out and the NWO eventually runs off. Page challenges Hennig as Flair limps around. That leg injury was the reason he wasn’t on Starrcade, which is a questionable decision to say the least if it’s not a legit injury.

The Steiners and Luger take Flair to the back as more fans try to run in but are quickly dispatched. The rest of the NWO comes out so Page bails through the crowd. Hogan and company get in the ring and call out the Stinger. The lights flicker and Sting shows up on the WCW sign at the entrance. He hops down and walks to the ring as we go off the air.

Overall Rating: B-. Pretty good show overall but I’m really dreading the move to three hours. They’re already having trouble filling in three hours and that’s what we’re going to get all the time, PLUS two hours of Thunder every week? It’s almost like that’s way too much material for one company to produce. Good thing this happened before and no other company on top of the business would try something that stupid again right? Good show this week but it felt long.

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Monday Nitro #117
Date: December 8, 1997
Location: First Niagara Center, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Larry Zbyszko, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay

We’re into the final three shows before Starrcade so the card really should start to fill out now. The main event tonight is Hall vs. Page which has a history from the early 90s which I doubt we’ll hear about. Other than that we’re hopefully going to get some new matches announced for the PPV as the card is pretty thin at the moment. Let’s get to it.

The announcers talk about Larry vs. Bischoff for a bit to open things up.

Konnan vs. Ray Traylor

Konnan immediately runs but gets punched down in the corner with ease. A powerslam sends Konnan to the floor but he pulls Traylor to the floor for a quick slugout. Ray is sent into the steps and Konnan pounds him down back inside. A DDT gets two for Konnan….and there go the lights. They come back up a few moments later and Konnan is out cold. Ray cautiously puts his boot on Konnan’s chest for the win. Not enough to rate here but it was dull while it lasted.

We see Rude helping in the beatdown of Page last week.

Steve McMichael vs. Barbarian

Mongo grabs a headlock to start and hits a quick shoulder block to take over. A hard shot to the back of Barbarian’s head actually hurts him and we cut to the Flock in the crowd. Barbie comes back with a big boot to send Mongo to the floor followed by some whips into the barricade and apron. Back in and a kind of pumphandle slam gets two on Mongo and Barbarian goes up top. His flying clothesline jumps into a shot to the face and Mongo grabs the tombstone out of nowhere for the pin.

Rating: D. After a year and a half, Mongo should be better than he is here. He’s been in the ring with some solid talent over this time and he’s just not getting any better. Barbarian is a generic heel but he’s not bad in the ring. Mongo dragged him WAY down here and the whole Mongo experiment is clearly not working.

Post match Meng runs in and puts Mongo in the Death Grip.

Gene suggests that no one respects Disco for losing to Jackie. Disco says he’s tired of hearing about it. I think everyone is tired of hearing about Jackie in general.

Buff Bagwell comes out and challenges Luger because he’s buff and we’re in Buffalo. Seriously, that’s what he said.

Prince Iaukea vs. Dean Malenko

Eddie comes out to do commentary again. After a quick feeling out process to start, Malenko snaps off a good dropkick and goes after the knee. Prince fights up and hits a quick clothesline to send Dean to the apron. Back in and they trade nearfalls as Eddie is ripping into Dean like there’s no tomorrow. A double clothesline puts both guys down but it’s Dean up first for the double underhook powerbomb and the Cloverleaf for the fast tap out. This was just a step above a squash.

Nitro Girls.

Nash says he’s the real giant of pro wrestling and that Giant is one dimensional.

Giant says he’s the real giant of pro wrestling and that he’s going to chokeslam Nash.

Nitro Girls.

Chris Benoit vs. Lodi

Again this is supposed to be Raven but he’s not here tonight so it’s the yet to be named Lodi instead. Tony has a name for him and calls him Load-Eye. Benoit knocks him off the apron to start and chops Lodi up against the barricade. They head inside with Benoit talking trash to the Flock and chopping the skin off of Lodi’s chest. Benoit hits his hard clothesline to take Lodi down and loads up a superplex. The Swan Dive and Crossface end this destruction as Benoit impresses again.

The Flock doesn’t run in because Raven isn’t here to lead them. Benoit grabs a mic and tells Raven to get out here and take a beating like a man. He promises to teach Raven what abuse is really about.

Here’s Ric Flair who says Hall, Nash and Hogan would get theirs at Starrcade. As for Hennig, Flair wants him in a cage at the PPV. Gene asks about Bret Hart and Flair calls him the real greatest of all time and invites Bret to come to Nitro. Oh wait actually Flair is the best ever and comparing Bret to Flair is like comparing John Elway to Jim Kelly. Hey look who is in the front row: Jim Kelly!

Randy Savage vs. Hugh Morrus

Savage knocks Jim Kelly’s hat off and Morrus jumps Macho to start. Kelly and teammate Bruce Smith get in some shots of their own and this is all before the bell. They head inside and I think we’re underway. Morrus hits a running clothesline in the corner and shouts insults about the NWO.

A second charge into the corner misses and Savage dumps him to the floor. Back in and Hugh hits a powerslam for two but Savage avoids a top rope elbow. Randy slams him down for his own elbow but pulls Morrus up at two. Another elbow hits but the lights go out again. About a minute later the lights come on and Savage is out with a Sting mask on. Morrus wins for no apparent reason.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here other than angle advancement at the end. Morrus was one of those guys who was always around but never really did anything of note. This was one of those things he was good for though as Savage got to beat him up until the stuff at the end of the match.

Rude and Bischoff head to the announce table and say they don’t buy Schiavone’s nonsense. Granted I don’t think anyone else did but I get their point. They threaten the announcers and make them do the see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil poses. Ok then.

TV Title: Saturn vs. Disco Inferno

The announcers say we have to take a break because they’re scared for their lives. Back with Saturn throwing Disco around as Tony spends the first few minutes talking about how they need to not ignore the match. Saturn is knocked to the floor and Disco sends him into the steps, only to have Saturn drop him onto the top rope back inside. The champ cranks on Disco’s arms before hitting a high angle suplex for no cover.

A top rope elbow misses and we head back to the floor again with Saturn sending him into the barricade. Disco Stuns Lodi over the barricade before pounding away on Saturn in the corner. Saturn hits a neckbreaker to take over again, followed by a big suplex for two. Disco counters a powerbomb out of nowhere and Stuns Saturn for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. I have no idea what the point of this was. We spend two months making fun of Disco for losing to Jackie and then give him a clean pin over a killer like Saturn? That’s supposed to make us forget about everything he’s done for the last few months? The match wasn’t bad but the booking makes you wonder what WCW was thinking at this point. I guess the idea was that Raven wasn’t there to guide him, but……Disco Inferno?

We look at another Nitro Party winner.

Nitro Girls.

Buff Bagwell vs. Lex Luger

Bagwell immediately sends him to the floor and poses only to be run over with a clothesline. We get a pose off followed by Luger pounding him into the corner and hiptossing Buff down and flexing some more. Buff comes back with a clothesline and a belly to back suplex before pounding on Luger’s back. Off to a camel clutch but Luger fights up and slams him onto the mat as Norton comes out. Luger makes his comeback with his usual stuff (clotheslines, atomic drop, forearm) to send Buff to the floor and as he fights off the NWO, Buff gets counted out.

Rating: D. Bagwell just isn’t at this level yet and Lex Luger isn’t going to be the right guy to bring him up at all. This is the second week in a row where these two have done nothing of note and it’s not really bringing Bagwell up the card at all. Then again no one ever would despite the guy being around for like ten years.

Video on Sting.

Scott Hall vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Main event time. Hall does the survey as the announcers complain about being threatened too much. As the camera goes to the regular shot of the ring to open the match, someone holds up a HUGE Undertaker cutout which made my head snap around when I saw it. Hall starts with the driving shoulders and we actually hear about Page managing Hall back in the day. They fight over a top wristlock and Hall is sent down to the mat.

Page pounds away in the corner and gets two off a clothesline. Hall comes back with the middle rope bulldog for two of his own and stomps away a bit. The fallaway slam hits for two as the fans are lethargic at the moment. Off to the abdominal stretch as we hear that if Zbyszko beats Bischoff at Starrcade he gets a shot at Hall. As is the custom though, Page counters into a stretch of his own, only to be hiptossed over. The Outsider’s Edge is countered into a backdrop and some atomic drops have Hall in trouble. Page pancakes him down but here’s Hennig for the DQ.

Rating: C-. They were clearly going through the motions out there with a bunch of signature stuff from Hall and that’s about it. This is the problem with WCW anymore: everything is just filling time to get to the run in and the story advancement post match. Why would I get into a match and the near falls when there’s probably a 90% chance it’s going to end in a run-in?

The beatdown is on and Page is in big trouble. Even Hogan and Bischoff come out for this one. Another Sting dummy falls through the ring and even Hogan points it out this time. Hogan talks trash and has the NWO pull the Sting dummy out of the hole. Hollywood keeps talking trash to the dummy and the dummy stands up. It’s the real Sting cleaning house and Hogan is terrified to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Lame matches, little storyline advancement, questionable booking in what advancement we did get. Yep this is the WCW that I knew was coming and didn’t want to have to sit through. They’re clearly just coasting until Starrcade, which is in three weeks and has three matches announced if my math is correct. Not a good show here and you can see the cracks starting to come out here.

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He was indeed great but….He wasn’t a heel for all that long.  Think about it: Piper hit the national scene in let’s say 1982, was a heel until about 1986 and has been a face for all of about a year (on and off in WCW) since then.  Piper has been a face for about 25 years after being a heel for roughly four, yet he’s eternally remembered as a heel.  That says either that heel run was amazing or that the fans have a very short attention span.

Monday Nitro #32
Date: April 22, 1996
Location: Albany Civic Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan, Steve McMichael

Well after last week’s horrible show we’re back with a very similar card. However on this one we have Benoit vs. Guerrero so this should be better already. The main event is the same though with Flair/Giant challenging Sting/Luger for the tag titles. Apparently if Flair gets pinned tonight he loses the world title to the pinner and if Luger gets pinned he loses the tag and TV Titles. Interesting I guess. Let’s get to it.

 

McMichael’s dog has the glasses where the eyes are on springs. Oh my aching head.

 

Public Enemy vs. American Males

 

Bischoff gives away the results of Raw which is always an interesting thing to see. Also of course next week would be a taped Nitro but who cares? Public Enemy puts a table up at ringside pre-match. Bagwell is going to be in a movie apparently. I wonder if it’s hard or soft. We actually talk about Slamboree a bit which is a first I believe. The Males clear the ring and hits some decent dives to further their advantage.

 

We talk about Brian Pillman who has been in a car wreck, which is what kind of led to his death. Grunge vs. Riggs is the official starting match. Dropkick puts Grunge on the floor and a double dropkick puts Rocco down for no cover. Off to Bagwell for all of four seconds and a wristlock before Riggs comes back in. Grunge vs. Bagwell again with Grunge choking away.

 

Now Rocco in with a Lionsault for two. These teams are tagging in and out very quickly. After a brief beatdown, Bagwell gets a cross body out of the corner for two. This hasn’t been much of a match at all. Swanton Bomb (kind of) by Rocco misses and it’s time for Riggs to come in. He and Grunge come in at the same time and Riggs gets a forearm for two. Everything breaks down and Public Enemy throws Riggs over the top which is a DQ this week so that’s it. Egads.

 

Rating: F. The match was boring and then the ending made it even worse. This company changed the rules for over the top every week and here it happened to be a DQ. It’s a weak DQ and a cheap ending to give Public Enemy the loss. If you want a DQ then let the hardcore crazy people be hardcore and crazy. Not that hard.

 

Bagwell goes through a table post match.

 

We get the first round draw for Lethal Lottery at Slamboree. Hooters Girls help out here for some reason. This is “random” mind you.

 

Barbarian/Bobby Walker vs. Meng/Hugh Morrus

Big Bubba/Stevie Ray vs. Fire and Ice (yes a regular team was “randomly” drawn. That’s the second one drawn)

Ric Flair/Randy Savage vs. Arn Anderson/Eddie Guerrero (awesome pairings there)

 

Slamboree sucked if you didn’t get that.

 

Chris Benoit vs. Eddie Guerrero

 

Benoit charges him into the corner and taps him on the jaw like a little boy. Eddie, ever the showman, does exactly the same thing. Benoit hits the floor and Eddie teases a big dive so Benoit backs off. Smart psychopath. Back in the ring for some nice technical stuff as you would expect. Benoit hits a chinlock and we take a break. Back and we’re still in the chinlock which is always a weird thing to see. Bischoff swears it’s live so it’s hard to say.

 

We hear about the Cruiserweight Title tournament which is mainly happening in Japan (allegedly) because WCW wasn’t that smart. Belly to back by Eddie gets him out of the hold, only for a suplex to hit him for two also. Apparently Savage is being restrained in the back by cops. They slug it out as we talk about Savage some more. Eddie is sent to the floor and comes back in with a top rope rana for two. In the corner Eddie tries a sunset flip but Benoit kneels down on it and grabs the ropes for the pin.

 

Rating: C+. Well they had better ones, that’s for sure. Not a bad match and the lack of time due to the commercial hurt it a lot. The only think I can say here isn’t Benoit vs. Guerrero. I don’t think they’re capable of having a bad match so what were you really expecting here?

 

Some WCW suit comes out and says Savage needs to play nice. Savage gets in his face and says something about blowing up city hall. The suit says get a therapist. This was, in a word, pointless.

 

Meng vs. Jim Duggan

 

Apparently in the main event partners can pin partners. Oh dear. After a break before the match, Meng is on the floor hiding a bit. Back in and Duggan hammers away, only to have Meng run away again. Dude, Meng used to be a monster and unstoppable and now he’s running from Jim Duggan who punches him in the head. I give up. Duggan hammers him down and Meng goes to the floor again.

 

Bischoff runs down the WWF results again as Heenan FREAKS over the idea of Flair having the world, tag and TV titles. Bischoff talks about Hogan for no apparent reason as they’re really trying not to talk about this all punches all the time match. Duggan starts no selling until Meng finally beats him down a bit. Now Meng’s head hardens about 10 times in the middle of the match and we hit the nerve hold.

 

Duggan fights up and we go right back to the nerve hold. This is basically turning into a match by who wants to sell less. Duggan hammers away as Meng gets back up. Three Point Clothesline misses and Meng pounds even more. Big boot gets two for the Tongan and Duggan hits the floor to wrap his hand up in tape. A shot with that is enough to get the pin.

 

Rating: D. I wanted to hate this but there’s something kind of fun about two big guys just hammering away on each other until one goes down. It’s a horrible match and the selling is laughable but there’s something kind of fun about it for some weird reason. I think you’d have to see it to get the appeal.

 

More Slamboree stuff.

 

Dick Slater/Robert Eaton vs. Disco Inferno/Alex Wright

Steven Regal/Belfast Bruiser vs. VK Wallstreet/Jim Duggan

 

Yes, there were two regular teams, two teams of people that hated each other, and other opposite pairings. And this was legitimately said to be random. I have no idea how to respond to that but it’s great.

 

TV Title/Tag Titles/World Title: Ric Flair/The Giant vs. Sting/Lex Luger

 

All titles on the line, whoever is pinned loses the title to whomever. Flair is world champion, Luger is TV champion, Sting/Luger are tag champions. Flair hits on Debra one more time. Savage pops up to chase after Flair but gets arrested of course. Sting and Giant start us off. Apparently Giant has been offered a tryout with the Detroit Lions. Not a bad idea actually.

 

Luger and Sting double up to clear the ring and the challengers take a breather. Back to Luger vs. Flair as Luger shows off his arms. Luger takes over with clotheslines and it’s Flair Flop time. Sting vs. Giant is announced in a grudge match which hasn’t really been a grudge. Off to Sting who has his usual good mini match with Flair.

 

Slam off the top sends Flair flying. Superplex sends Flair out to the floor again as a kid that is maybe 8 wants to punch him. Stinger Splash against the railing misses though (of course. You would think he’d learn after awhile) and it’s off to Sting vs. Giant again. Why in the world would Flair want to be in the room against Sting? Have Giant go in there to try to win the tag titles and don’t run the risk of losing the world title.

 

Mini-hot tag to Luger who cleans house. Giant grabs him for a chokeslam but Sting comes off the top with a chop block. Giant still has the grip on Luger so Sting hammers away which FINALLY breaks the grip. Woman slips hot coffee to Flair again and it goes into Giant’s eyes for the CHEAP DQ.

 

Rating: D+. I hate matches like these where the whole thing is set up and they use a back door to avoid having to do something major. Not a horrible match but I hate the ending which is going to drive me crazy in the coming year. Also having the same ending two weeks in a row is just lazy booking.

 

Flair begs off Giant as Gene comes in for a chat with the big man. Giant wants the title and Flair says apologize or else. The Giant goes after him and the champion bails.

 

The announcers say the title match is on for next week and talk a lot to wrap things up.

 

Overall Rating: F+. Other than Eddie vs. Benoit, this was awful. It was incredibly clear that they had no clue what they were doing from week to week. Thank goodness some things would change the next week and then about five weeks from here everything would change forever. Terrible show and quite possibly the worst in the entire series to date. That would of course get shattered later, but this was pretty bad.

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Fall Brawl 2000
Date: September 17, 2000
Location: HSBC Arena, Buffalo, New York
Attendance: 8,638
Commentators: Scott Hudson, Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden

Well we have I think five or six PPVs to go in this company so this isn’t something where I would expect much. The main event is Booker vs. Nash in a cage as they’ve given up on the idea of War Games I guess. Other than that there’s a huge elimination match and Steiner vs. Goldberg, which hopefully has less shooting in it this time. Maybe we can shoot Russo. Let’s get to it.

Cruiserweight Title: Kwee Wee vs. Elix Skipper

Skipper was given the title by Storm and is a Deion Sanders ripoff that I always loved. Kwee Wee makes Rico look straight. Kwee Wee has Paisley with him, more commonly known as Sharmell, Booker’s wife. Kwee Wee had a weird double personality thing where he would go insane at times which is how he starts the match here. We go a nice wrestling sequence to start. Skipper is fun to watch and I’ve always liked him.

They botch a leapfrog and Skipper might be hurt. Hudson makes a reference to some guy named Johnny Walker from the 60s. Only Walker I know of is a whiskey but whatever. We have a WAY too long chinlock by Skipper as this is such a shell of what the Cruiserweight Title used to be. Prime Time (Skipper) does what Trish would steal and call the Matrish.

This is more like a match between two small guys than two cruiserweights. Crowd is kind of dead here but is behind the face so that’s a good sign I guess. The Natural Born Thrillers come out and I begin to smile. The Thrillers were a group of young guys that were something NEW and got pushed. Sure they were generic as all goodness but they were a freaking breath of air. There were like seven of them, led by Mike Sanders. They included Chuck Palumbo, Mark Jindrak, Shawn Stasiak, Sean O’Haire, Reno and Johnny the Bull. These guys were pretty generic, but DANG it was nice to see some fresh faces.

They don’t actually do anything as Kwee Wee comes back and beats the tar out of Skipper to no reaction at all. Skipper hits the floor and Mike Sanders comes in with a kendo stick (a stickball bat or some kind of device according to Tony) and bashes him in the knee for two. The Thrillers are gone but now it means nothing as we’re pretty even anyway. Overdrive (MVP’s Play of the Day) ends it.

Rating: D+. This was just not clicking at all. The match was dull but hey, it had a run in so it has to be interesting right? This just was nothing special at all as they just did a mat based match and then a screwjob ending. I’m not entirely sure what the point was here as the styles clash killed it. Not a good way to start but not a horrible match.

3 Count vs. Misfits in Action

The Misfits here are Sgt. AWOL (The Wall who most of you likely don’t remember) Lieutenant Loco (Chavo) and Corporal Cajun (Lash Leroux). The band has a new song here that likely could have been a decent hit if sung by a “legit” band, which is either great or scary. The idea of the Misfits was that they were guys that were thrown out of storylines by Russo so they banded together as their only way to have a chance. That works well enough.

And yes, 3 Count gets a match against someone not named the Jung Dragons. Two of the boy band members are Shannon Moore and Shane (Gregory) Helms. The third sucks. We hear about Duggan giving the flag and board to General Rection (Hugh Morrus) and will be in his corner tonight. Yeah I’m sure this isn’t going to go badly at all for Rection.

This is a pretty basic match but it’s not bad. They’re just kind of filling in time as these matches aren’t going to mean anything past tonight anyway. The idea here is that the band is scared to death of AWOL so they’re going to try to keep him out. Simple story but it works. Leroux was a lot better than he was given credit for. I might even stretch to say he was pretty good.

He hits a springboard X Factor to get the hot tag to AWOL who cleans house. Moore hits a nice flip to put Cajun down and we let the high spots loose. AWOL gets knocked through a table (his signature thing) but not before holding Moore up off the ground purely by his hair. Everything goes insane and Leroux hits Helms with what we would more or less call Cradle Shock for the pin. They get a standing ovation for it and that’s what they deserved.

Rating: B. I REALLY liked this. There was no interference, there was nothing completely insane, the effort was there and the wrestling was there. What a shock that when you put all this together, you get a good match. Worst thing is I can more or less guarantee this is the high point of the show.

The old guys won’t give a kid an autograph. That’s WCW for you. Madden gets a line in about Nash carrying people. I laugh sadly…..point to this?

Harris Brothers vs. Kronik

And there goes the quality of the show. This is first a chain match, as in they’re attached by a strap. The twins (Harris Brothers/Disciples of Apocolypse/Creative Control/Blu Brothers etc) cost Kronik the belts last month. Adams makes it a first blood match, because gimmicks added on for no apparent reason other than to keep an old guy from having to get pinned and therefore lose credibility TOTALLY RULE!

Dave Penzer, the announcer, gets knocked out like a minute in. We go out into the crowd and this is already a mess. As I’m typing this I can see the review of the previous match and it makes me sad. That and even the previous match were good. This is just annoying and is going to mean nothing at all in the end. Hudson talks about how brutal this is and how it’s going to be violent. We’re less than three minutes in and he’s right: it’s brutal.

One of the Harris guys works on Clark’s knee in a first blood match for reasons of general idiocy. We get choking, which even Tony calls out as stupid. And we have a ref bump in a gimmick match. One of the Harrises is bleeding but there’s no referee of course. The chain is undone and Hudson suggests he’s on his period instead of being busted open. END THIS. Yeah the blood is wiped off and Adams is bleeding when the referee gets back up so Kronik loses. Kronik beats up the referee to be faces.

Rating: F+. Well seven minutes have passed and nothing of note has changed. These two feuded forever and no one cared at all. We went from good stuff to this, which like I said shouldn’t surprise anyone. Get to the next thing.

General Rection tries to do a big patriotic promo which would work a lot better if he wasn’t destined to have Jim Duggan turn on him since he’s the special enforcer.

US Title: General Rection vs. Lance Storm

Storm cuts a great heel promo about how great Canada is. He was AWESOME at this point and more or less could do no wrong on the mic. He would just get out there and be this pompous jerk but was so proud of being Canadian and no one could beat him, making him awesome. And here’s Duggan to be all patriotic. Great to see that white shirt under his referee shirt. I’m sure that will mean nothing at all.

Rection dominates to start and Storm is in trouble. Also Major Gunns has been kidnapped by Team Canada so she’s freed if Rection wins here. They say that the General could be a superstar. That’s just amusing. He’s more commonly known as Bill DeMott if the comedy name isn’t familiar to you. Storm hits a superkick that was on target but didn’t look painful at all.

Rection hits a sitout gutwrench powerbomb (spellcheck hates that sentence) for no cover. Storm gets up and goes after the knee. Duggan throws Storm back into the ring and gets up on the apron while the General goes for the moonsault. And say it with me: Duggan is Canadian. Storm gets the win while Rection is out cold in the Mapleleaf. MIA runs out and Duggan beats them down.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t horrible, but the turn might as well have had a big sign over it saying HEEL TURN COMING. Rection would wind up winning the title at the next two PPVs while no one cared about it nor were they watching. This didn’t go anywhere though and it’s only because of Storm’s pure awesomeness at this point that it gets this much. That and Gunns in those shorts. I mean DANG.

Gene (wearing glasses now) talks to the Natural Born Thrillers. Sanders imitates Konnan so Gene calls them various bad names and tells them to blow it. Sanders was very good on the mic.

Filthy Animals/Big Vito/Paul Orndorff vs. Natural Born Thrillers

Filthy Animals: Konnan, Rey Mysterio, Disco Inferno, Juventud Guerrera, Tygress (female manager)

Natural Born Thrillers: Mark Jindrak, Sean O’Haire, Mike Sanders, Chuck Palumbo, Shawn Stasiak, Reno, Johnny the Bull

This is elimination style. Yes it’s that Paul Orndorff. He trained most of the Thrillers in the Power Plant (the same place that said one Dave Bautista had no future in wrestling) and he drew about 15 years ago so he’s PERFECT here. Orndorff is a mystery partner here. He SHOCKS the Thrillers. OH NO! IT’S ON OVER THE HILL OVERRATED GUY THAT HASN’T MEANT A FREAKING THING SINCE WE WERE IN 5TH GRADE! Wait….this is WCW and he’s over fifty…..WE’RE SCREWED!!!

Stasiak goes on commentary for no apparent reason. Konnan makes gay jokes and introduced Orndorff. Wow this is so completely overhyped. No one cheers either. They just kind of breathe. Also, we get to see a 51 year old man that looks about twice that old in lime green tights. Rock on brother man.

This was billed as 6-6 but there are so many people that a lot have to drop to the floor, making it look like 4-4. Rey and Juvy are tag champions as I try to fill space. Ok apparently they aren’t….they just have the belts for the second straight PPV in a row. Rey tags in Juvy to absolutely NO reaction. I wasn’t looking at the screen and didn’t even notice it. Normally you get a sound from the crowd to let you know that something happened but there was NOTHING here.

O’Haire hits a Falcon’s Arrow to take down Juvy who of course is fine like 4 seconds later. Vito, the big guy on the team I guess, beats up Jindrak and is only there for Johnny. And here’s Disco to again complete silence. Oh never mind they think that he, a face, sucks. Jimdrak, a guy about 6’5, can’t get a dropkick past the ribs of Disco who is about 6’0. Ok Konnan is in the match despite sitting on the floor so far.

Konnan crashes into Disco so Disco accidentally hits him with the Last Dance (Stunner) to eliminate him. Shawn says five to go, implying 6-6 to start. Disco can’t get anyone to tag him in so Vito punches him and Reno Rolls the Dice to end him and make it 6-4 I guess. Vito hits an Edgecution on Palumbo for two. Bull hits Vito in the head with a kendo stick and a Roll of the Dice (rolling cutter, Cross Roads) ends him.

That leaves it as Juvy, Rey and Orndorff left, so Madden suggests that Tygress is on the team too. So then Tony says it’s 6-2 as Orndorff is there for…..oh screw it let’s just get this over with. Guerrera hits a flying…..something to Reno. Tony calls it a body attack which sounds like something from Mortal Kombat. Juvy Driver and WHAT’S UP on Reno makes it however many vs. however many. Oh and over ten minutes in and I think there are 4 people that haven’t even been in yet.

Rey and Juy apparently ARE the tag champions here. Tony said they weren’t 8 minutes ago and now they are. My goodness I know WCW at this time is called insane but I’ve always thought it was overhyped. In this match alone, about ten minutes long at this point, we can’t establish how many original participants there were in this match, we’ve gotten three different answers as to how many people are left on one of the teams at this point, and we don’t even know if two guys are tag team champions? Ok according to Wikipedia they are the champions but are forced to forfeit them tomorrow for no given reason. Now why can I establish that and the paid announcers can’t?

The fans hate Tygress all of a sudden as Juvy’s plancha is just caught. And then HOKEY SMOKE O’Haire and Jindrak LAUNCH Juvy from the floor into the ring off a double hip toss. That looked incredible. A Swanton Bomb ends Juvy…..and here’s Orndorff. Of course he beats up all the young guys but a kendo stick takes care of him. He hits a bad piledriver to get rid of Johnny the Bull.

Rey and Tygress (now on the apron) just let Orndorff get double teamed and do all the work. Sanders hasn’t been in yet. He of course beats up Jindrak and O’Haire on his own, making them look completely weak in the process. He goes to piledrive Jindrak and of course gets hurt coming down, giving himself a stinger (same thing that happened to Austin in 97 off the Owen piledriver) and O’Haire quickly covers him for the pin because of the injury.

Rey and Tygress I guess don’t get that he’s really hurt and keep going on Jindrak. After a pair of Bronco Busters we get the idea so they beat up Sanders and Palumbo to keep the crowd into it I guess. Pay no attention to the fact that they’re landing around Paul’s legs or anything like that. And they stop the match because of the injury. They would conclude it the next night where Rey and Tygress would beat five guys on their own.

Rating: F. There should be two ratings here. The match itself was entertaining and was about a B/B-, but to let a guy in there that was 51 years old and had retired because of a neck injury and then, shocking no one with a brain, hurts his neck in his first match back in like 5 years is simply irresponsible. I don’t care if he swears up and down that he’ll be ok or whatever. You don’t let him into the ring with his neck hurt like that, and this is why.

He wasn’t even taking a bump and he got hurt. Imagine what would have happened if he had been taking am ove and got hurt like this. There is just no way you can validate letting Orndorff go out there. It didn’t sell any more shows because he wasn’t even announced, so this comes off as just irresponsible by WCW and there’s no way that is ok in my mind.

Kidman and Madusa talk about their scaffold match. Yeah this is a perfect place to go after what just happened, but at the same time that wasn’t planned. Madusa threatens to demoralize her. What the heck does that even mean?

Shane Douglas/Torrie Wilson vs. Madusa/Billy Kidman

The scaffold is over the stage here which I’m sure is completely safe. Also instead of putting them on the scaffold which starts on the ground and is raised up, they have to climb and waste more time. Douglas promises to pay everyone’s money back if the faces don’t get thrown. This is a Pittsburgh PLUNGE match, but apparently you win by crossing and climbing down. Sure why not. Kidman and Madusa don’t get entrances and just walk out and get on.

Tony tells Madden to get his jokes in so Tony can sell the match. Egads man. Tony insists it’s still going up when you can tell it’s perfectly still. The scaffold here is at least fairly wide to the point where they can walk side by side on it. That’s a LOT better than previous kinds. You know it’s a good thing we have those VIDEO screens to show the Fall Brawl logo so we know what show this MATCH is on.

The girls sprint off to get down the other side and are all alone so they just stand there. Kidman and Shane have a match up there with counters and a Sky High powerbomb and then the Franchiser (modified Stunner) on Kidman. And then Shane kicks Madusa down the ladder so that she crashes down. Now since she didn’t climb down, she doesn’t win. Oh give me a break.

Shane beats up Kidman and has him down so Torrie comes back over and waits for him to make his comeback and then hits him low so Shane can throw Kidman off the scaffold and onto the crash pad below. Once someone reminds them which way to go, the heels win. Yep, Shane Douglas is pushed over Kidman. Do I even need to explain why this was bad?

Rating: F+. How do you really grade one of these? It was maybe five minutes long and went nowhere. Shane made Kidman look freaking pathetic here and that doesn’t surprise me at all. Shane was in the downside of his career and Kidman was a guy with potential. Of course he lost. Whatever, and at least Torrie looked incredible.

Sting talks about his three way with Muta and Vampiro. Oh and he has a world title match tomorrow night. Jeff Jarrett jumps him for no apparent reason.

Mike Tenay goes to David Flair’s house to talk to him about the wedding that didn’t work. He was supposed to marry Stacy since she was pregnant and it turned out the baby wasn’t his. We never found out who it was but it allegedly was going to be Ric Flair and would wind up being some kind of incest angle, or Russo because clearly a 20 year old Stacy would screw him.

David is losing his mind and his place is covered in trash and pizza boxes so he lights up a cigarette but throws it away because it’ll kill him. David goes paranoid and thinks that his brother Reed, who is 11, is the dad. He goes to the window a bunch of times where he says the father is here. And then he doesn’t do anything about it.

I didn’t order this PPV and I think this aired on TV later because I’ve seen this before. David sprints to the door and says the father is here so he runs outside and beats up the mailman, putting him in the figure four on the front lawn. There also was a camera waiting on the camera guy as he was I guess coming across the street. What a coincidence eh?

Sting vs. Great Muta vs. Vampiro

ICP is with the heels here who come out together. The clowns are on commentary here. They talk about JCW and I get it now. Maybe I did get this PPV but I could have sworn they did commentary on Thunder too. The commentary is funny to a degree but it gets old fast. They beat on Sting for awhile but they fight after Muta goes for a pin and Vampiro doesn’t like it. This is definitely a different match than the one I remember. Sting gets a bat and hits the Death Drop on Muta for the pin. There was nothing else of note to talk about here. The clowns and Vampiro beat up Muta and Sting makes the save.

Rating: D-. At least it was short I guess and the commentary made me laugh once or twice. This feud was just never going to stop and no one at all cared about it. Granted that might be because of Vampiro and the fact that no one knew who Muta was because WCW never told us that but whatever.

Mike Awesome, in 70s clothes and a Partridge Family bus, shows up with a surprise: it’s Gary Coleman. Sadly he gets one of the biggest pops of the night. They do a terrible comedy bit with Pamela Paulshock who was drop dead gorgeous.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Mike Awesome

This is a bunkhouse brawl, meaning hardcore match. There are Buffalo Bills at ringside and Jarrett wears a Titans jersey to be a jerk. He makes bad football jokes and this goes dead fast. There are weapons in the ring and Awesome brings his own table. The announcers say that Jarrett is the favorite in this match. We have ropes and wheelbarrows here as you can hear Dusty jacking off to this.

There are nooses around the ropes and a table covered in barbed wire. This is Jarrett’s specialty match in case you didn’t know. Why is it his specialty match? Well no one knows but whatever. It starts out as just a weapons match with nothing at all special about it. Jarrett backdrops Awesome from the middle rope through a table just to be mean. Jarrett goes into the barbed wire table twice and then a sitout powerbomb gets two.

After the Awesome Splash misses, Jarrett yells at the Bills some more. And here they come, surrounding the ring while security does nothing at all. They shove him into Awesome and the powerbomb gets….two. I know the ending to this match and I thought the match was ending there. Not because it was a close pin or anything but because there was no reason at all for it to continue other than the inevitable Gary Coleman stuff that you know is coming.

And here he is. The Bills let Jarrett get a guitar and Coleman just walks into the ring and low blows Jarrett who them just kills him with the guitar. NOW FREAKING STING IS HERE to beat up Jarrett so that Awesome can FINALLY win. So let’s see: Mike Awesome, Gary Coleman, Sting and THE BUFFALO BILLS ended this. How much do you think all this cost?

Rating: D. I almost hat to type Gary Coleman sold the guitar shot. Did someone think this was going to help business somehow? Did someone think this was going to be funny? I mean eas there a point to this at all? If there was I don’t get it. The hardcore stuff was ok here though, but the match was just WAY too much to be good.

Scott Steiner says he’ll beat Goldberg here because he has big muscles.

Scott Steiner vs. Goldberg

This is just a grudge match and I guess Goldberg is a face here. No DQ here either. Steiner has to wear a mask because Goldberg broke his face or something. We’re told about how even these two are which is odd but makes sense at the same time. Scotty busts out a Diamond Cutter for two. Ok then. Steiner tries to hide and that doesn’t go well at all for him.

They’re doing the clash of the titans build here and for the most part it’s working. And here’s Midajah, which is supposed to be a big deal I guess. Goldberg is bleeding from some chair shots. She’s just standing there for no apparent reason. Oh ok Goldberg accidentally put her through a table. Steiner hits a belly to belly where Goldberg lands on his head and nearly breaks his neck. There’s the spear. We have a lead pipe in there too which I’m sure will have something to do with the ending.

And it’s Vince Russo to bash Goldberg with a baseball bat. Sure why not. It only gets two though and Bill goes through a table. Steiner Recliner, which looks awful since Steiner doesn’t know how to hook it right, doesn’t work as Goldberg picks him up. This is the match where they just hammer each other with no real rhyme or reason. That doesn’t mean it’s bad though as that’s what this is supposed to be. Think Awesome vs. Tanaka.

Back to the Recliner which would look a lot better if it wasn’t just Goldberg crawling on his hands and knees (yeah the arms aren’t even pulled back) to the ropes. A chair is brought in and nothing happens with it. Russo comes in AGAIN but Steiner pops Goldberg in the head with a lead pipe and the Recliner gets the win on the unconscious Goldberg. Oh and Russo does the Jericho cover on him to end it. The Bills come in again to help Goldberg. More on Russo in the overall rating.

Rating: B-. This was about being a big old fight and that’s all it was supposed to be. We didn’t need to have real wrestling here and they didn’t try. I could have done without Russo here but at the same time this match oddly worked. This was probably a #1 contenders match of some sort too.

Booker says he’ll get the title back. Nash booked himself to win the title for about three weeks so he could defend coming into this.

WCW World Title: Booker T vs. Kevin Nash

Dang there are some attractive women in Buffalo. This is a cage match. We get a Scott Hall reference, even though Hall was long since gone at this point. No waiting at all as we’re starting to run out of PPV time. The cage looks extra tall here which is allegedly 12 feet high which is believable here. The camera is weird here as it’s outside and we keep looking up at the guys.

We’re told that Orndorff had a stinger but is talking and has movement in all of his limbs. That’s always good to hear. Nash is actually moving a bit in there. He takes the buckle pad off as Tony, much like Billy Graham did 12 years ago, asks why you need to do that when you have a cage around you. Axe Kick puts Nash down as apparently him slamming Nash is a big deal.

They’re flying through this match with no transitional stuff at all. Nash is bleeding here. RONCO REFERENCE! Yeah that has nothing to do with wrestling but I have a thing for infomercials so there we go. We’re told Nash has a lot of heart. Uh…sure. Jackknife is blocked into the Book End for the title for Booker.

Rating: C-. This FLEW by and felt like a Nitro main event rather than a PPV main event. Goldberg vs. Steiner likely should have closed the show but I can get that they wanted to make the world title seem important. This wasn’t anything all that great at all but for once one champion lost the title to another guy clean and simple. What more can you ask for? Booker would hold the title for 8 days, so it’s not like this meant much in the long run.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a rather good show. The problem is this is pretty much the best show for WCW in their last 15 months or so. The elimination match would have been a lot better had it not been for the injury and while I still wouldn’t have liked Orndorff getting in there even if he hadn’t gotten hurt, the injury is what made that match fall apart so you can’t blame the wrestlers for it.

The scaffold match was really short so that didn’t hurt things too much. This isn’t a classic or anything but it’s definitely watchable as they toned down the insanity a lot and the show is completely coherent with nothing overly bad that goes more than say five minutes.

The most important thing here is simple: there’s a point to everything on the card. Nothing here is insane or just thrown on there, which is the point of a PPV. If you want a taste of what WCW could do around this time, this is your best chance. And then it means nothing at all as Vince Russo would win the world title 8 days later on Nitro, killing anything the company had left for it.

 

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