Road Wild 1998
Date: August 8, 1998
Location: Sturgis Motorcycle Rally, Sturgis, South Dakota
Attendance: 8,500
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan

So we’re back to Sturgis again and we’re a month removed from Karl Malone and Dennis Rodman in the main event of a PPV. You know that means that we’re in for a real mat war tonight right? I mean they wouldn’t……oh screw the joke. It’s Hogan/Eric Bischoff vs. DDP/Jay Leno. In the words of some book I read once, yes, THAT Jay Leno. This is going to be a mess. Let’s get to it.

The opening is about motorcycles. And Leno.

Again I do have to give them this: the scenery is gorgeous.

The announcers talk about the main event and an NWO battle royal which has Goldberg in it. Oh I’ll have a few things to say about that one I think.

Gene is on a motorcycle and says nothing of note. Oh he’s plugging a motorcycle manufacturer that sponsors the show. Ok then.

Meng vs. Barbarian

Why they split is beyond me but this could be either half decent or dreadful. I’m leaning towards the former actually. This is a total brawl of course and they even throw in some sumo stuff. Meng controls some of it but walks into a belly to belly overhead suplex to put him down. Powerbomb by Barbarian is countered and Meng hits a piledriver.

Barbarian pops up but misses a headbutt. Meng goes up but Barbarian hits a belly to belly superplex to get two. Meng comes back with a powerslam and Jimmy Hart gets on the apron to do nothing of note. They slug it out and Barbarian takes over for a bit. Never mind as the Tongan Death Grip goes on for the pin.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t that bad actually. This was a power brawl and they beat each other up pretty well for about five minutes. Putting them in front of a crowd of bikers who want to see older names (just wait for Hogan’s pop later) fight made this an even better idea. This was far more entertaining than good.

Hugh Morrus comes in to save Jimmy from a beatdown but Jim Duggan comes in to save Meng. There’s something from Nitro involved here but just saying the word Nitro is all we get as far as a detailed explanation.

Public Enemy vs. Dancing Fools

The Dancing Fools are Alex Wright/Disco Inferno and they have some dancing Japanese guy named Tokyo Magnum. After Disco stalls for a bit we start with Rocco vs. Wright. Rock controls on the arm of Wright and the match is already really boring. Wright comes back with a dropkick and dances a bit. Off to Disco who dances as well. Tony thinks the fans would rather see wrestling than dancing. The ovations for WWE for the dance contests would disagree.

Off to Grunge and Disco hits a clothesline and brings Alex back in. Back to Rocco and the Dancers keep control. Grunge gets in a shot and the Public Enemy double teams a bit to a very modest reaction. Magnum hands in a trashcan which goes upside Grunge’s body and doesn’t draw a DQ for no apparent reason. Rock runs to the back and brings in a ladder. Tenay says this is now a street fight and hey, it’s WCW so that’s ok I guess.

The Fools try to leave and come back with a table. This is ridiculous. Disco grabs a mic and asks if they want to make this a street fight. Sure why not. Is this a house show? Public Enemy goes to the back and comes back with a kitchen sink, a toilet seat and some other stuff. This is making my head hurt. Public Enemy takes over because IT’S REALLY STUPID TO CHALLENGE THEM TO A STREET FIGHT.

A mailbox is brought in and goes upside Disco’s head. Wright suplexes Rock onto the trashcan so Grunge hits him with a cookie sheet. They set to put Wright through a table but Disco makes the save. The bikers rev their engines as the Fools take over. They keep hammering on each other and Magnum gets in. Heenan: “Why not?” My thoughts exactly. The Public Enemy hit stereo atomic drops but Wright kicks Grunge down.

Magnum accidentally hits Wright so Grunge hits Disco with the ladder. Wright and Tokyo walk out so Disco is alone. The Enemy sets up three tables as the “match” stops dead. Disco is dragged up the ladder and put on top. Rock climbs the structure around the ring and drives him through all three, throws Disco in the ring, lets Tokyo come off the top with a splash that hits Disco by mistake and this is FINALLY over.

Rating: N. As in nothing, which is what I’ve got. This went FIFTEEN MINUTES, therefore being the second longest match of the night. They made it a street fight for no apparent reason and the ending was a mess. I have no idea what was going on here, which I know I say a lot but in this case I really don’t. Who decided that THIS was a good idea?

Dean Malenko is a guest referee later and says he’ll be fair in the Cruiserweight Title match later.

Raven vs. Saturn vs. Chris Kanyon

This is under Raven’s Rules, which means hardcore. You know, after we just had a street fight. Tony says this is about Kanyon who has been missing lately but Raven says that Kanyon has been thinking about joining the Flock and making this a handicap match. Raven tells Kanyon to get him and Saturn jumps Kanyon. Raven brings in a chair and pops Saturn with it but Kanyon is quickly knocked to the floor.

Kanyon gets rammed into the post by Bird Boy but Kanyon pops back up and beats on Saturn. Heenan tries to explain who is on whose side here and I feel the need for a flow chart. Saturn and Kanyon finally figure out what’s going on and beat on Raven, including hitting Total Elimination. Kanyon legsweeps him and Saturn hits a guillotine legdrop but Kanyon breaks it up.

While Kanyon and Saturn fight, Raven comes in with a chair shot to both guys. We’re in standard triple threat territory here. Saturn and Raven go to the floor and Kanyon dives on them. They fight into the aisle which looks like a road. Saturn knocks Kanyon down and beats on Raven on what would usually be the stage. Kanyon piledrives him up there for two as Raven saves.

Raven dropkicks Kanyon and Kanyon falls down the ramp. Saturn dives off the stage to double clothesline them both and no one cares. Back to the ring and everyone is down. Heenan says he wishes he was in this match so he can give up. Saturn hooks a sleeper on Raven and Kanyon puts one on Saturn for the triple sleeper spot. Kanyon is in control now and loads up Saturn for a superplex, resulting in a Tower of Doom. What Raven exactly added to that I’m not sure but who cares?

Raven tries to double DDT the guys but only gets Saturn. Kanyon climbs the structure like Rocco did but the splash misses. Oh Lodi pulled Raven away. This match is going WAY too long again. Death Valley Driver by Saturn (finisher) puts Raven down but Lodi saves. Horace comes out with his stop sign but accidentally hits Rave, allowing the second DVD to get the pin for Saturn.

Rating: D+. This was another brawl and far better than the previous one, but that doesn’t really take a lot to accomplish. That being said, it’s still something we saw just a few minutes earlier and the relationship between the three is no clearer than it was when this started, making this whole match, say it with me, TOTALLY POINTLESS.

Psicosis vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

For the #1 contendership for the Cruiserweight Title. Psicosis takes him to the mat with a chinlock which is a strange thing to see opening the match. Now off to an armbar and then a wristlock. This match goes REALLY slowly as Rey takes a falcon’s arrow. No one cares about this match either, but that could be because they’re bikers instead of wrestling fans, but who cares about that?

In a cool move, Psicosis puts rey in the corner with Rey’s chest facing the buckle. He wraps Rey’s around around the ropes and pulls them back. Naturally it lasts about 2 seconds but whatever. We’re almost five minutes into this and Rey has had zero offense. Suplex puts Rey down but Psicosis does the really annoying jump into the feet thing to give Rey some control. Rey flies around and hits a rana to send Psicosis to the floor.

Back in Rey hits a nice top rope cross body for two. This crowd is driving me crazy. I mean they’re SILENT. GEE, MAYBE THIS WAS A REALLY STUPID IDEA, but how else could Eric Bischoff get to ride his big boy bike and then pay Leno a ton of money while not even getting a gate back to offset some of the costs? Off to a nerve hold as Tony talks about the effects of it. When has he ever been in a nerve hold?

An electric chair drop into a bridge gets two for Psicosis. Rey gets sent to the floor now because Heaven forbid this match gets interesting or some crazy stuff like that. Great. A FREAKING HALF CRAB. YOU GUYS ARE CRUISERWEIGHTS!!! ACT LIKE IT! Psicosis lets go of the hold after about two seconds like a video game as the fans shout boring. Yeah and they’re right. A top rope rana puts Rey down for two. Psicosis goes up for something and is dropkicked to the floor.

Rey FINALLY hits a nice springboard somersault plancha to the floor. Springboard sunset flip gets two. Rey hits a pretty cool leverage assisted Fameasser. He hits the ropes again and Psicosis counters into a flapjack position but slams Mysterio down, almost like a spinebuster. Just to tick me off even more (and believe me, this show is doing a GREAT job of that), Tony says it was like a jackknife powerbomb. I hate Eric Bischoff. I hate that he made good announcers into idiots that couldn’t have an intelligent bone in their bodies because it might make someone actually think in this company. West Coast Pop FINALLY ends this.

Rating: D. It’s not a failure because of some cool moves by Rey, but this was SO boring. Psicosis kept standing around after almost every move he did, almost half of the match was a Psicosis squash, and the knee work did nothing at all. This was terribly boring with neither guy caring at all. To be fair to them though, would you be?

We’re seventy minutes into this show and I hate it. I absolutely cannot stand this show. The matches SUCK, the fans don’t care (BECAUSE THEY AREN’T WRESTLING FANS), Public freaking Enemy gets FIFTEEN MINUTES because they got ripped off from ECW and Eric has to shove more of that down our throats because he’s too freaking stupid to come up with anything on his own (notice Total Elimination and the triple sleeper spot in the threeway, both ECW standards), the wrestlers don’t care because the fans don’t care, AND JAY FREAKING LENO IS IN THE MAIN EVENT because him liking motorcycles makes this a good idea. This company deserved to die.

ON WITH THE SHOW!!!

TV Title: Chavo Guerrero vs. Stevie Ray

Stevie is defending because Booker is hurt I think and Chavo is nuts. Chavo says he’s TV Champion because he wrote up a contract saying so. This sounds stupid but my goodness this is a breath of air and it’s not even funny. Oh apparently Booker hasn’t approved Stevie to be champion. Ok then. Eh screw it we’ll call this a title match anyway.

The stick horse Chavo has says he’s the champion. Chavo desperately wants a handshake but Ray runs away from it. They go to the floor and nothing happens. Chavo runs on the floor again and Stevie chases him. This goes on for a minute and a half. Slapjack (elevated Pedigree) ends this quick. Jericho would win the TV Title two days later (this was on a Saturday) on Nitro. Why did this match exist?

Stevie goes after Chavo some more but Eddie makes the save.

Jericho gives his usual funny promo about a conspiracy against him and how Malenko is in on it.

Rick Steiner vs. Scott Steiner

This is a big grudge match that has been building for months. This HAS TO be good. And here’s JJ Dillon to say there’s no match. Buff Bagwell wheels out Scott on a stretcher taking oxygen and in a bunch of bandages. The fans LOUDLY boo this out of the non-building. Bagwell says Scott is injured and can’t wrestle. Dillon guarantees it’ll happen at Fall Brawl. OH SCREW YOU. SCREW YOU WCW. This show has SUCKED for the last eighty minutes and now they pull a freaking bait and switch. This is ridiculous.

Rick comes after him and just because WCW wants to FURTHER tick off its fans, Scott gets up and runs away.

Brian Adams vs. Steve McMichael

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD WHY????? Who booked this nonsense? Who in the world freaking thought BRIAN ADAMS needed to be on a PPV against Steve McMichael? Mongo wants to reform the Horsemen or something but Anderson wants nothing to do with it. This is something that should be a dark match on Thunder, not in the middle of a horrible PPV. Adams is NWO if that means anything to you.

And on top of all that, the match is HORRIBLE. Irish whip, Mongo botches a punch from Adams, Mongo botches a shoulder block, Mongo grabs him around the head and SLOWLY pulls him down which was supposed to be a DDT. Adams goes to the floor for advice from Vincent. Back in he catches a boot in the corner and kind of powerbombs Mongo. When Brian Adams (Crush for those of you who can’t place his name) is the much more polished guy in a match, you can tell something is wrong.

Adams puts on a nerve hold and the fans are somehow more silent. Usually tonight we’ve had random shouts and such like that, but this is even more quiet as they’re not even doing that. Out to the floor and Mongo goes into the steps. After a backbreaker, Mongo comes back with a kind of belly to back suplex. Mongo takes out the knees but they botch something else, making it look like a claw hold from Adams but Mongo falls down like a clothesline. And now there’s a ref bump. ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? Vincent accidentally hits Adams with a chair and the tombstone gives Mongo the win.

Rating: N. As in nothing, which is what I have left at this point. Why in the world was this on PPV? Is this what WCW thought was going to be able to fight off Summerslam later in the month which had Rock vs. HHH in a ladder match? Tony has the nerve to call this an upset. Mongo may suck but he used to be a Horseman and US Champion. HOW IS THAT AN UPSET??? Why am I trying to figure out freaking Tony Schiavone at this point?

Gene talks to some team of girls from the motorcycle sponsor.

Cruiserweight Title: Juventud Guerrera vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending and has been finding ways out of losing the title for months, including going to the Library of Congress to find a rulebook from the NWA to get out a defense. Malenko is the referee here and Jericho thinks he’s in on a conspiracy against him. Juvy is unmasked by this point. Oh ok Dean might be in on a conspiracy because he can’t face Jericho for the title again so Jericho think Dean is trying to screw him out of the title so he can get a shot. See? You see how easy that was? WHY DON’T THEY DO THAT MORE OFTEN???

Juvy hits a dropkick for a quick advantage but Jericho kicks him down. Jericho knocks him to the floor and yells at Dean, who throws him into the corner as a result. Juvy comes back in with a missile dropkick to send Jericho to the floor. Guerrera rams him into apron face first but misses a plancha over the top and off the platform that the ring is on. Back in Juvy hits a slingshot legdrop for two. I think he caught Jericho a bit on the plancha to explain why he’s not dead.

A jawbreaker gives Jericho control but Juvy immediately comes back with a springboard crossbody for two. Dean is calling it fair so far. Juvy goes up for a cross body off the top but gets caught in a powerslam/piledriver combo. I think that was what they were going for off the springboard version but it didn’t come off quite right. It looked ok though. Suplex gets two. Dean is counting a little slow for Jericho’s covers. It’s not horrible but it should be faster.

Juvy heads to the floor as the match stalls a bit more. There’s been a lot of that but this has been BY FAR the best match of the night so far. Back in a backsplash gets two for Chris. Off to a chinlock which only lasts for a few seconds. Guerrera reverses a suplex into one of his own but Jericho knocks him down immediately. Lionsault gets knees but Juvy comes back again with a headscissors and cross body. I know this sounds like a big back and forth fast paced match, but it’s going very slowly. It’s still good but it’s not really working all that well.

Jericho hits the double powerbomb but walks around instead of going for the Liontamer. Heenan said he should go for the Liontamer so you know it’s a good idea. Out to the floor again and Jericho is in control. Back inside Jericho gets a clothesline for two. Dean hasn’t meant much at all here. Chris chops him and does his own WOO in a funny bit. Juvy hits a DDT to counter a powerbomb out of nowhere for two.

Juvy Driver gets two and Guerrera isn’t sure what to do. They’re trying to kick it into high gear here but it’s really not coming yet. Juvy loads up the 450 but gets crotched. A superplex puts the challenger down but Chris can’t cover. Juvy actually gets the cover for two. That’s not something you often see. Juvy tries a rana but gets caught in the Liontamer but Juvy gets the ropes before the hold was fully on.

Jericho yells at Malenko which allows Juvy to pounds Chris in the corner. Dean takes a finger in the eye and Jericho hits Juvy in the head with the title for a VERY close two. Dean was going to count three but there was a kickout. Jericho goes up top but Juvy smacks him enough to slow him down. Chris kicks Dean in the chest for no apparent reason, so Dean launches a charging Juvy into the air so Juvy can hit a hurricanrana off the top for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. Good match and BY FAR the best match of the night, but it’s nothing classic. If there was EVER a time that called for two guys capable of putting on a showstealing classic, this was it. Instead though, it was more walking around and not doing anything more than a decent match. That being said, I’d rather watch these two for seventeen minutes than anything else on the show for more than 8 seconds.

Battle Royal

Scott Hall, The Giant, Curt Hennig, Scott Norton, Kevin Nash, Lex Luger, Sting, Konna, Goldberg

Now THIS is where the main event booking gets illogical and where anyone paying attention would be able to figure out the smart move. This is Black and White (first four names listed), Wolfpack (next four names listed) and Goldberg. Now Goldberg is world champion at this point but doesn’t have an opponent to face for the most part. Giant (he and Hall are tag champions) has been “making it personal” with Goldberg lately. Now, common sense would say that Goldberg gets eliminated here and either the guy that eliminates him or the winner is his next feud.

However, that might mess with Goldberg’s winning streak. Ok, no problem. Common sense would say that he’s in the main event with Leno against Hogan/Bischoff. Goldberg won the title from Hogan about a month before this, so there’s a story put in already. Since this is WCW where logic and common sense are bad words, that’s NOT what they did. Hall does the survey, the fans like Goldberg. Entrances and survey take almost ten minutes. For absolutely no apparent reason, you can win by over the top elimination or pinfall. Not submission, just pinfall.

Goldberg stays in the corner to start as the Outsiders fight. Giant and Goldberg go at it to a big reaction. Total PPV matches those two had against each other: zero. Everyone else stands around and “brawls” on the ropes. Nash hits him with a big boot but Hall’s Outsider’s Edge is countered by Goldberg to put him out. Nash jumps out on his own because HEAVEN FORBID someone beneath him like THE FREAKING WORLD CHAMPION gets to put Nash out.

Goldberg spears Hennig and Tony Schiavone calls it the Goldberg Spike. There are four words you need to remember for Goldberg: jackhammer, streak, Goldberg and SPEAR. Do you see the word spike in there? No? Then why did Tony say it? That would be because TONY SCHIAVONE IS A FRICKIN MORON! Goldie hides in the corner but gets in a fight with Giant which goes nowhere. Tenay says that this Goldberg is in this match so that he can get his hands on Giant. PPV title match? What’s that?

Basically unless Goldberg is doing something, this match is really boring and no one cares. Sting puts Hennig in the Scorpion but it doesn’t mean anything because he’s not….ok apparently you can be put out by submission. Sure why in the world not? Spear puts Konnan out. Hennig has Goldberg off the mat but can’t put him out.

Giant suplexes Goldberg but Goldberg pops up, spears Hennig and tosses him. And Norton. Sting too. Might as well eliminate Luger too. Giant threw the last one out so we’re down to two. Chokeslam plants Goldberg so Goldberg channels his inner Taker and sits up. It was an Undertaker situp which made me chuckle. Spear and Jackhammer end this.

Rating: F. So not only was it boring, not only was it stupid booking because Goldberg dominated everyone and pinned Giant with ease, but Tony tries to claim that makes Goldberg 136-0, after he came in 129-0, because he eliminated six people. THEY CAN’T EVEN GET COUNTING RIGHT!!!

We recap the main event feud, involving Hogan and Bischoff “taking over” the Tonight Show.

Oh and the ring announcer changed halfway through the show for no apparent reason.

Hulk Hogan/Eric Bischoff vs. Jay Leno/Diamond Dallas Page

This is going to be awful isn’t it? I mean, at least with Rodman and Malone last month, they were ATHLETES. Bischoff gets to be in the main event in front of bikers though so he’s TOUGH. They come out to the theme of the Tonight Show and have Kevin Eubanks with them. This can’t end well. I mean it CAN’T.

The ring announcer says Page is 6’0 after him being billed as 6’5 forever. To Jay’s credit, he’s getting in the ring. Just to be clear, I have no issue with Leno in this. He’s a celebrity and is getting a check for this and looks like he’s having fun so I can’t say much there. Now WCW on the other hand, I have no issue complaining about. Leno throws water on Bischoff to make the NWO bail.

Did I mention there are twenty minutes left in this show? Leno has been training for ten whole days for this. Page and Hogan start things off. Eubanks is kind of ripped. This whole feud is about Eric having his own talk show on Nitro. Stalling to start until Page works on the arm of Hulk. Page punches him into the corner and Leno gets in a left hand. Hogan is knocked to the floor and Eubanks rams him into the post…..AND DOES IT PRETTY FREAKING WELL! That actually looked good.

Page gets caught in the corner and Leno charges in to save him. It doesn’t go anywhere but he’s got energy. Bischoff comes in and the tag is made to Leno. Bischoff runs so we actually get Leno vs. Hogan. Leno points at his chin which is kind of funny. He makes bald jokes and no contact has been made yet. Leno ducks a punch and tags in Page. Jay manages to start a DDP chant. Like I said, the guy is trying.

Page works on the arm and tags in Jay for a wristlock. To the announcers’ credit, unlike last month they’re reasonable here and say that Jay is doing well but they don’t blow it out of proportion. Hogan gets him into the corner and whispers to him before kneeing him in the ribs. Leno tags out but Page tags him back in. Jay’s face is priceless. They hit a double clothesline and Leno gets two on Hogan. He avoids a shot and runs over to tag out, looking like he needs oxygen, a box of Twinkies and a jacuzzi.

Out to the floor and I think Hogan punches a chair that Kevin was holding. Page no sells an Eric kick and I think we’ll have the wrestlers in there for the vast majority of the match. Scratch that of course as Bischoff comes in. He fires off some kicks and Tony praises him so he gets to eat this month. Disciple throws in a foreign object for Hogan to clock Page with so Eric can get two.

This has to be about over. I mean, it has to be. Hogan hits the big boot but Page moves before the legdrop. Discus lariat takes Hogan down and it’s time for Leno vs. Bischoff. Eric pokes him in the eye but Leno hits him low. He “punches” Eric a few times and rams him into the corner ten times (the bikers mess up the count but Leno gets it right) and is spent. Hogan comes in and accidentally hits Eric as everything breaks down. Eubanks comes in and hits a decent Diamond Cutter on Bischoff so Leno can get the pin.

Rating: D. Ok this is a different kind of match to grade. On one hand, this was a HORRIBLE match and as a match on its own, it’s one of the worst main events ever. On the other hand, if you didn’t expect that coming in, you’re an idiot. Leno tried and when he was in there, he was playing to the crowd and was moving around. I can’t fault him a bit for what he did because it was fine. The wrestlers did nothing and Eric continues to have no business in a ring. Horrible match, but you knew what you were paying for when you bought this show.

Post match the NWO beats down the winners until Goldberg makes the save (while wearing the belt. I don’t know if it’s that this has been one of the worst shows ever or if it’s that this is being written at 3:30am, but that cracked me up) to end the show.

Overall Rating: Failure. I usually would just put F, but I want to make it clear what I mean here. This was perhaps the absolute worst wrestling show I have ever sat through. It took me three days to watch it all because I couldn’t sit through it at once. The BEST match on the show is a so-so Cruiserweight Title match that would be one of the worst you’ll remember between those two.

As for the rest of it, no. There is no way that a company could look at its fans and call this an acceptable wrestling show. From STUPID stuff like making matches street fights on the fly to three ways that flat out steal spots from ECW, to Adams vs. McMichael to not having Rick vs. Scott to wasting PPV matches for months on end to make Goldberg look strong to the SECOND STRAIGHT MONTH of celebrity main events, this was one of the worst shows I’ve ever seen and I never want to think of it again. Stay FAR away from this unless you worship Jay Leno.

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SuperBrawl 1999
Date: February 21, 1999
Location: Oakland Arena, Oakland, California
Attendance: 15,880
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

Back to WCW to get three more shows down. This time we’re closing out 1999 which was the year when everything fell apart for these guys. The main event tonight is, wait for it, wait for it……HOGAN VS. FLAIR!!! Other than that we have a double elimination tournament final for the tag titles and Hall vs. Piper in what I’m sure will be a classic. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about various people that have won the world title. We get shots of their heads spinning around and audio of them winning the title. Then there are clips of Goldberg and Bigelow who also fight tonight.

The announcers talk about how Flair has EVERYTHING in wrestling riding on him tonight, whatever that means here.

We get a video on the tag title tournament which is double elimination for no apparent reason other than WCW has to have things be more complicated than needed. We get promos from the Horsemen who don’t have much to say. Windham and Hennig already beat the Horsemen once, because I guess you need to see the match for free before you decide if you want to pay to see it again.

But wait, we’re STILL not ready for the opening match because Gene needs to talk about the Hotline first.

Disco Inferno vs. Booker T

Disco is in the Wolfpac here to give you an idea how far the NWO has fallen. Why are these two fighting? Who cares, it’s not important enough to mention apparently. Ok to be fair we do get a clip from Thunder of Disco getting on Harlem Heat’s nerves because Stevie is in the Black and White so Booker jumped him in defense of his family. That’s better than nothing. Booker is just starting to become a big deal in singles competition.

After almost ten minutes into the show, we get the opening bell. And never mind as it’s time to pose. Booker hiptosses Disco and Tony tries to explain why WCW is still fighting the NWO. There’s a Disco Sucks chant as the crowd seems very hot tonight. Disco comes back with a very nice spinning neckbreaker. Booker slams him but Disco kicks him off. Disco is hanging in there more than you would expect. Oh wait, dance break.

Disco comes back again with some basic stuff and then a chinlock. They’re looking crips here instead of just going through the motions here and it’s really helping. Disco closes him over the top and out to the floor. Back in and Disco slams him and drops a middle rope elbow for two. Booker comes back with kicks, resulting in the ax kick but he doesn’t go up yet.

Disco comes back AGAIN (not a bad thing) but jumps into an Alabama Slam. Brain calls it an ax kick and even Tony thinks he sounds crazy. Disco takes him down for about the fifth time but the Chartbuster is countered. Side Kick sets up the Harlem Hangover (top rope flipping legdrop) gets the pin.

Rating: B-. This was WAY better than you would ever expect it to be. Disco got in a lot of offense and the match was really good as a result. Instead of a squash we got a back and forth match with Disco coming close to having a chance, which is way more than you would expect from him. Good stuff and the crowd is still hot.

Chris Jericho vs. Perry Saturn

Saturn lost a loser wears a dress match to set this up. Ralphus is in a dress and Jericho is in something that looks Japanese. They started playing Saturn’s music and then changed it to Jericho, which was the right song as he came out first. Referee Scott Dickinson is involved in this somehow on Jericho’s side. Saturn is in a dress also. Jericho runs his mouth before the match and tells Saturn he looks like an idiot. That ticks Saturn off and we’re ready to go.

They go to the floor and into the crowd almost immediately. Back to ringside and Saturn goes into the barricade. Back into the ring and Saturn shifts between a German suplex into a dragon suplex before settling for a t-bone suplex. Saturn avoids a dropkick and slingshots Jericho to the floor. For no apparent reason, Saturn throws Ralphus into the ring and rips Ralphus’ dress off.

Jericho uses the distraction to pop Saturn in the head, followed by a suplex. Chris tries his posing pin but Saturn takes him down and rams his head into the mat. Jericho knocks him to the floor for a bit but misses a top rope splash back inside. Saturn, with his dress bunching up on him, kicks Jericho down and hits a frog splash. He loads up the Death Valley Driver but Jericho counters into a rollup with feet on the ropes for two.

They exchange control for a few seconds until the Canadian hits a German on the American for two. Jericho hits a top rope cross body but Saturn rolls into the Rings of Saturn. He’s too close to the ropes though and Jericho gets to the ropes. Now Saturn tries a Lionsault but Jericho rolls away and hits one of his own for two. A spinwheel kick misses for Jericho and he walks into the Death Valley Driver. Instead of covering though, Saturn hits a DVD on referee Dickinson and walks out on the match, meaning he has to keep wearing the dress.

Rating: C+. Not a great match here but they picked things up towards the end. Then they got to the end and things got a lot worse. The Saturn dress thing went on for awhile while Jericho just went through the motions for the next few months before he finally got to go to the WWF in August.

Rey and Konnan are giving an interview on the internet. It’s Rey’s mask vs. Liz’s hair in a tag match later.

We recap Page vs. Scott Steiner. Steiner wants Kimberly and I think threw her out of a moving car. That match is later apparently.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Billy is defending. These two were a team in the tag title tournament but have split up obviously. Kidman sends him to the floor and Chavo yells at the fans. Luger is out of the tag match with Nash tonight and Nash has a replacement. Back in for a few seconds but Chavo is knocked right back outside. Kidman follows this time and gets pulled from the apron into the barricade to give the challenger control.

A weak brainbuster gets two. Off to a chinlock by Chavo as Tony and Bobby debate what it means to be aggressive. Chavo knocks him to the floor and hits a gorgeous flip dive to the floor. Kidman comes back with a top rope cross body for two. Chavo starts working on the back to try to slow Kidman down. He tries to powerbomb him but gets backdropped and Kidman gets in a dropkick as Chavo comes off the top. The selling is really quick in this match.

Kidman tries to take him into the corner but Chavo takes over and hits a top rope rana for two. The crowd is DEAD for this which is both not surprising and a bit annoying because the match isn’t that bad. At the end of the day though, it’s not that bad which is probably why they’re so dead. Chavo hits an elevated DDT with Kidman draped over the top rope for two. He tries a powerbomb but Kidman counters into a facejam (one of his signature moves) and the Shooting Star Press gets the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad but we’ve seen Cruiserweight matches so many times before and a lot of them are a lot better than this one. Chavo was never the kind of high flier that was going to make people say WOW when he wrestled which is fine because he’s a heel here, but he didn’t have the heel attitude yet to back that up. Still though, it was fine for a 9 minute match.

Quick video on Bigelow vs. Goldberg.

Tag Titles: Barry Windham/Curt Hennig vs. Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit

Since WCW is stupid, in this case if the cowboys get the first win, they win the titles (they’re vacant coming in). If the Horsemen (Malenko/Benoit as it occurs to me that all four have been Horsemen at one point) win the first fall, they have a second match. The cowboys have beaten the Horsemen once already in this tournament. Tony goes into a long explanation of how the teams have motivation to win the match, because WINNING THE TITLES isn’t a good enough reason.

Dean and Barry start things off with Barry running away a lot. They go to the mat and Dean rolls Windham around a bit so it’s a double tag. Tony explains how three of the four guys in here are second generation wrestlers. Heenan: “So is (referee) Mickie Jay.” Tony: “Who is his father?” Heenan: “Well he wasn’t a wrestling referee. He umpired a peewee football league in Moline, Illinois.” Heenan’s on tonight with the comedy.

Hennig gets chopped to the floor and runs from Malenko. Off to Barry vs. Benoit Windham gets thrown around and it’s off to Malenko who hits a dropkick but I think Windham was supposed to hold the rope to avoid the contact. There might have been a tag in there somewhere but it’s Barry vs. Dean still anyway. Even Tony says that was kind of odd. Hennig comes in for a double clothesline which missed but Dean sells it for two anyway.

Dean manages a bridging pin of some sort as the crowd is quiet again. That’s a shame as they were white hot for the opener. Dean rolls through and tags Benoit in after not having much damage done to him. Chris cleans house and backdrops a cheating Windham. Backbreaker gets two on Curt. Back to Dean who gets two off a belly to back suplex. Benoit comes in again and the referee literally has his back to the action for about 20 seconds. Swan Dive hits Hennig but Windham makes the save again.

Now Dean covers him but the referee STILL isn’t paying attention. It’s not even a heel thing. He’s just not doing that well in this match. The fans are booing him now. Curt gets crotched on the top so Dean dropkicks him down to the apron. Everything breaks down and throwing someone over the top isn’t a DQ this time for whatever reason. The referee is with Barry again but turns around to see Hennig hit Dean low. Think that’s a DQ? Nope, as Barry comes back in to suplex Malenko for two.

Now the referee doesn’t pay attention as the Cowboys beat up Malenko on the floor. Barry covers him with one hand for two and it’s back to Hennig. The fans aren’t thrilled with this match. Benoit comes in before he’s tagged but the referee is cool with that. The crowd is dying quickly. Back to Barry who hits the superplex but Dean saves. By “saves”, I mean doesn’t touch him but Barry jumps off Benoit anyway. This is like a comedy of errors.

The Cowboys hit a double suplex (after messing up a bit first of course) for two. Hennig hits his necksnap for two. Heenan wants a flamethrower brought in here. Tony: “You are an idiot.” Dean makes a save off a Windham something that we don’t see. This match is going on WAY too long. Benoit finally breaks through and gets the hot tag. Everything breaks down and on the second attempt, the Cloverleaf makes Windham tap.

We get a thirty second rest period between falls here. The Horsemen hammer on Hennig during the break and Dean goes for the Cloverleaf again. Windham chokes him out with a belt and pins him to win the titles in 20 seconds.

Rating: D. I love the Horsemen but the refereeing was HORRIBLE here. Actually most of the match was horrible here. Aside from that, Benoit still hasn’t won a title at this point. Instead we get a title on BARRY FREAKING WINDHAM??? In 1989 sure but in 1999? Seriously? A boring match and stupid stipulations so that Benoit and Malenko can win and then not get the titles anyway. Stupid all around, but such is WCW. Malenko and Benoit would get the titles in three weeks and lose them in another two weeks.

We recap the US Title feud which somehow involves Hall, Nash, Flair, Hart, Benoit, Will Sasso from MadTV and results in Piper vs. Hall for the title later.

Outsiders vs. Rey Mysterio/Konnan

Hall is substituting for Luger. It’s Mysterio’s mask vs. Liz’s (HOT here) hair. Why? Not really worth mentioning according to the announcers. Luger is with them too. Heenan runs down the idea of lucha libre and the masks Rey wears. Rey and Hall start as Heenan keeps going. Hall throws the toothpick at him so Rey throws it back. Now why hasn’t anyone else ever done that?

Hall shoves him around with ease so Rey speeds things up with an armdrag. The Outsiders aren’t taking this seriously at all because they’re smaller. Also Konnan was recently thrown out of the Wolfpac so there’s your reason for him being in this. Dropkick knocks Rey down and a springboard Fameasser gets two. Seated Senton (called a Thesz Press for reasons of general stupidity by Tony) puts Hall down as well.

Rey tries a third springboard but jumps into the fallaway slam. Off to Nash who gets a pop as well. He literally throws Rey around and it’s back to Hall again. Hall plays the drums on Rey’s head and loads up the Outsider’s Edge but Mysterio escapes and makes the hot tag to Konnan. He cleans house for a bit but gets caught in the back by a knee from Nash and a clothesline from Hall to slow things down again.

The beating goes on for awhile as this is bordering on an extended Outsiders squash. Konnan gets in some right hands and a double clothesline takes both Hall and Konnan down. Double tag brings in Rey and Nash and it’s springboard dropkicks all around. Everything breaks down and Konnan/Rey double team both guys. Luger trips up Konnan and sends him into the steps. Rey hits a moonsault and his knee “hits” Nash in the head to knock him out cold. Liz distracts the referee so Hall can hit the Edge on Rey and put Nash on top for the pin.

Rating: C. Not the worst match in the world and it had the hot ending, but what does this gain? Rey in a mask is a superhero, and without it he’s just another guy. I get that you couldn’t cut Liz’s hair, but maybe that shouldn’t have been up in the first place. I mean, why would you want to have $25 masks of a popular wrestler for sale? Who would want that?

Rey takes his mask off. Nash says put it back on. Rey looks about 13, making him FAR less interesting and making his name (King of Mystery) totally worthless. Such is WCW.

TV Title: Scott Steiner vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Steiner is Wolfpac and champion here. There’s no transition between the matches as he celebrates with the Outsiders on their way out. Scott brings some plant (and hot) chick into the ring pre match. Page is all serious here. Steiner stalls so Page takes it to the floor. Total brawl for the most part so far with Page pounding on him for the first few minutes. Steiner knocks him into the railing but Page is right back up with a top rope clothesline and a neckbreaker.

Here’s Buff Bagwell because we can’t go five minutes without a run-in here. Bagwell gets in the ring and this is all cool. Page cleans house anyway and knocks Buff to the floor, but Buff hits Page in the back to let Steiner take over. Out to the floor and Page is sent into the barricade and Buff hammers on him some more. Both guys choke Page as Heenan repeats both announcers. This match is going nowhere.

Page gets in a tiny bit of offense here and there but we’re mainly in squash land. Page pulls Steiner’s trunks down so Tony can make his moon jokes. Buff slides in a chair and distracts the referee (why bother?) so Steiner can hit Page with it. Page escapes the Recliner with a low blow (referee was two feet away and looking right at it) as Buff uses boltcutters to take the pads off. This is like a cartoon. Buff actually gets ejected as Steiner has Page covered.

DDP knocks Steiner to the floor and Page dives onto Steiner but gets sent into the steps for his efforts. Back in Scott hits what he calls the Frankensteiner anymore for two. Page hits his jumping DDT (called the Diamond Dream, in the only time I remember hearing it called that) for a delayed two. Page tries the Cutter but Steiner sends him into the exposed buckles. Another shot into them sets up the Recliner for the referee stoppage. By Recliner I mean a chinlock because he can’t even be bothered putting Page’s arms over his knees.

Rating: D-. This was pretty awful. Steiner was pushed like a god for WAY too long, despite not many people caring about him at all. Him putting someone in the Recliner until they passed out was WCW’s version of Flair interferes, Pedigree, HHH retains from 2002-2003. Horribly bad match but they’re old guys in WCW so you know they’re not going to be that good.

Page gets taken out on a stretcher to make Steiner look even stronger. The fans chant that Page sucks.

Mark Madden talks to Bigelow who says this was his plan.

US Title: Roddy Piper vs. Scott Hall

This match alone should sum up most of WCW’s problems from this era (or most eras for that matter) in a nutshell. First of all, this is the third straight match with the Wolfpac theme music in it. Second, WCW has a roster including but not limited to: Hart, Booker T, Benoit, Mysterio, Jericho, Malenko, Saturn, Guerrero, Guerrero Jr. and probably a bunch of people that I’m forgetting, and they have Piper vs. Hall for the title and the announcers treat it like some dream match. That’s WCW for you.

Disco is with Hall here. We hear about Piper winning the US Title for the first time from Flair back in 1981. Why do you need me here? These jokes write themselves. Piper throws the kilt on Hall and pounds away at him. Piper does his usual punching, choking and poking. Oh and slapping too. Can’t forget the slapping. Hall is about to tell him to suck it so Piper hits him in the ribs then tries an actual wrestling move, hitting a neckbreaker for two.

Hall hits the shoulder blocks with the wristlock but Piper pulls the hair to take Hall down. Disco tries to interfere so Piper messes up his hair. There’s Disco’s career highlight. Hall takes a few atomic drops and Piper pokes him in the throat. Out to the floor for Piper to chase Disco but Hall rams him into the steps instead. Back inside and hall punches him down. Piper hits him low but Hall basically no sells it. Piper gets put in the Tree of Woe as Heenan says Hall is one of the top five in the world today. At what exactly?

Piper gets out of the corner and Tony praises him for doing it on his own. Off to the abdominal stretch and Piper is in trouble again. In a moment that gives me a small seizure, Heenan ACTUALLY EXPLAINS SOMETHING, saying that when Disco pulls on Hall’s arm, it’s not so much for the torque on Piper but also to prevent Piper from being able to move Hall around or hip toss him.

Disco lets go and Piper hiptosses out. Piper hooks the sleeper but Disco comes in to break it up. Disco gets beaten up and Nash runs in. Piper hits him too but Hall gets in a shot and covers with his feet on the ropes to win the title. Yeah, because SCOTT HALL is the right choice to give a title too. That gives the NWO the World, US and TV Titles. In 1999.

Rating: F. This match was awful. I mean really, PIPER VS. HALL IN 1999??? Who thinks that’s a good idea other than Piper, Hall and their mothers? Terrible match with neither guy being able to do much other than punches and really basic holds. Matches like these are the reason this company went under.

Piper, ever the sportsman, throws the title at Hall’s feet, gets in a fight with Hall and steals the belt back. Piper runs from the Outsiders and shouts something at them. Was there a point to this at all?

Oh and this match was originally going to be Bret vs. Benoit but WCW decided this was the better choice.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Goldberg

Goldberg gets the first real pop in an hour and a half. He’s billed from Stone Mountain here instead of Atlanta. Did they owe Jake Roberts a favor or something? I’m still trying to get over the fact that people said Austin and Goldberg looked alike. Stalling to start and they test each others’ power. Bigelow shoulder blocks him down so Goldberg picks him up for a delayed slam, sending Bigelow to the floor.

The announcers praise Goldberg for being able to do basic stuff. Goldberg picks Bigelow up for what we would call an FU. He then applies probably the worst cross armbreaker you’ll ever see. The fans chant ECW and Bigelow gets to the floor and hits Goldberg low a bunch of times. Bigelow works on the knee and goes back inside for more knee work. Now he works on the arm and hooks a chinlock. This isn’t exactly what I expected for a Goldberg match.

Goldie fights out of it and hits a belly to back suplex. Bigelow slams him down and hits the top rope headbutt for two. Moonsault misses and Goldberg loads up the spear. HUGE reaction for that but Bigelow moves. I mean literally, the fans rose up to see it. The second attempt hits and he sets for the Jackhammer but stops. He superkicks Bigelow instead and spears him again. NOW the Jackhammer gets the pin.

Rating: D. Yeah the match was bad but this single handedly brought the crowd back to life. Just to further prove how stupid WCW was, they had decided that this guy getting these kind of reactions wasn’t worth it because they needed to take the title off Nash and have him hand it back to Hogan. The idiocy of this company continues to astound me. The match mostly sucked.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan

No video intro or anything, because who would ever want to watch a WCW show years after the fact? Hogan comes out to the Wolfpac music too, putting the total at five matches out of nine having Wolfpac members in them. Hogan is champion. Flair got a long beatdown on Nitro before this that ran like 10 minutes or so. Hogan runs him over to start and does it again. Oh I really don’t like where this is going.

Flair gets in a hard chop as we get the backstory two minutes into the match. Flair was president of the company and made Hogan defend here, then the NWO destroyed David Flair (remember that) so Ric put himself into the match to get revenge and maybe the title. Hogan clotheslines him down for two. He chops at Flair in the corner but Flair comes back with some of his own.

The knee drop hits Hogan, complete with the camera cutting away so that Flair knee dropping the mat is missed. Hogan takes him down again as Flair can’t get anything going. Flair Flip sends him out to the floor. Out to the floor and Flair blades before Hogan hits him with the chair. Hogan wins the slugout (duh) and this is becoming very one sided. Then again that’s how most Flair matches start.

A suplex on the floor keeps Flair down and they go back inside. Flair gets all fired up, basically Hulking Up so Hogan punches him down with ease and whips him with the weightlifting belt. Flair goes for the leg to take Hulk down but Hogan whips him with the belt from his back. This is ridiculously one sided. Flair pokes him in the eye and kicks him low (remember that Flair is the good guy here). He whips Hogan with the belt and Hogan ACTUALLY SELLS IT!!! I’m as shocked as you are.

Hogan is bleeding a bit now too. The fans are looking at something else and here comes the mystery chick from some vignettes over the past few weeks. It’s Torrie Wilson who has been shown talking to an unseen cameraman who she’s been sleeping with apparently. She comes in and stays at ringside as Flair punches Hogan in the corner. Flair suplexes Hogan but Hogan does the power kickout and Flair lands on the referee.

Hogan drops an elbow on the referee and pounds on Flair. Big boot hits but the Legdrop misses. Here’s a masked man who draws David Flair chants. Now remember, David got beaten half to death by the NWO recently, so there would be NO REASON AT ALL for him to beat up Flair. The masked man gets in the ring, stuns Ric with a tazer and lets Hogan keep the title.

Rating: D-. So basically this was a Hogan squash for 8 minutes, then three minutes of Flair getting in some offense, then Hogan coming back and destroying Flair some more, then Torrie came out, then David (oh sorry, the masked man) came out and tazed Flair and Hogan wins. That’s your PPV main event people.

The masked man is the aforementioned cameraman and yep, it’s David Flair.

Overall Rating: D-. It’s another show that sums up WCW’s problems in one night: nonsensical twists (the explanation is that David turned on his dad for Torrie. His father is Ric Flair. Do you really think Ric couldn’t get him about 100 gorgeous women? Oh wait, HE DID THAT SOON AFTER THIS SHOW) bad booking picks (yeah let’s give Scott Hall a title) and the NWO winning all of their matches and holding all of the important singles titles. Also, no face won a major match tonight. Bad BAD show and a good example of why WCW was falling further and further into a black hole.

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Monday Nitro #70
Date: January 13, 1997
Location: Louisiana Superdome, New Orleans, Louisiana
Attendance: 10,034
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyzsko

This is another step towards Souled Out but we have another show after this before we get to the Saturday PPV. Tonight sees one of the most interesting (and unsuccessful) marketing gimmicks ever but it wasn’t as bad as a lot of things they tried. More on that later. Anyway other than that, we’re getting the PPV main event to close the show….kind of. Let’s get to it.

We open with Giant trying to get at Hogan in the NWO locker room. Giant: “You’re a four legged feline.” What kind of an…..never mind. Giant calls him a coward which Tony and Larry immediately say means Hogan isn’t defending the title.

Mr. JL vs. Chavo Guerrero Jr.

Larry and Tony talk about the Hogan vs. Giant non-match with Larry seemingly referencing Showdown at Shea. They trade headscissors and Chavo dropkicks him to the floor. Chavo hits a pescado to the floor and there’s an ECW chant for some reason. JL gets in a shot and misses a dive off the top to the floor. Back in JL misses a slingshot splash and Chavo hammers away. Cross body gets two for Guerrero. Chavo goes up but gets chopped down and JL hits a rana for one. Guerrero knocks him down and hits a moonsault press for the pin.

Rating: C+. Pretty fun little match here as the Cruiserweights get to go out and show off a little bit. It’s got nothing on Rey or Dragon or anything like that but it’s not supposed to. This was a good choice for an opener as the crowd was getting into this pretty strong at the end which is always a good sign.

Here’s Duggan with the WCW flag. WCW is awesome and Sting needs to pick a side.

Jim Duggan vs. Super Calo

Sting comes out and drops Duggan because he doesn’t want to watch this match. Larry/Tony: “HE’S NWO!!!”

Craig Pittman vs. Chris Jericho

This is a replacement match apparently. They cover the guys being in gear by saying this is a match scheduled for later. That’s something that would save a ton of time in wrestling: a never seen matchmaker who makes matches just because matches need to be made to fill a show. We could save so much time on going to see the GM saying that so and so is facing so and so. Anyway this lasts like a minute and Jericho wins with a missile dropkick.

Harlem Heat vs. High Voltage

Larry and Tony have the following discussion during the entrances. Larry: “Sting must be NWO. Even I wouldn’t hit Duggan.” Tony: “Yeah you would.” Larry: “Well not from behind.” Booker and Kaos start with Booker dominating. Off to Rage who hits a slingshot legdrop…and then it’s off to the back where Giant charges at the NWO again, this time calling them monkies. Eric and Hogan talk about how there was no contract so there’s no match.

Tony and Larry talk about how he should get the shot because of winning World War 3 as Harlem Heat is in control. Booker misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Kaos. Everything breaks down and the Heatseeker (Doomsday Device with a missile dropkick) gets the pin. Too short to rate due to the NWO/Giant stuff.

The WCW Executive Committee is meeting at the WCW Headquarters across the street (why they’re in New Orleans is beyond me) and they’ll make a decision about Hogan vs. Giant.

Bischoff and Dibiase take over on commentary.

We get a video on Sting since he became Crow Man.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Mark Starr

Starr actually gets an entrance and comes out second. Maybe he used his Starr power to get it? Thankfully the Diamond Cutter ends this in about a minute so I can’t be pelted for that horrible joke.

The Outsiders come out to give Page the colors and Page hugs Nash. He puts on the shirt and shakes Hall’s hand before pulling Hall in and laying him out with the Diamond Cutter. Nash gets sent to the floor and Page bails through the crowd.

The Outsiders have an NWO promo about how they’re going to come after Scott Steiner’s back in the match at Souled Out.

Dean Malenko vs. Eddie Guerrero

This is non-title. We’re told that there’s going to be a decision from the executive committee and they’re walking across the street to give it to us, because phones don’t exist in the bizarro world of WCW. Technical stuff to start and Eddie takes him to the mat. He works on the arm but Dean grabs the knee. Eddie spins out of that and it’s a standoff. Dean hits a leg lariat to take over.

We get breaking news: Piper was speaking an ancient version of Gaelic last week when he was being taken away. Tony has MORE breaking news. Hogan has to face the Giant, TONIGHT. Remember that, because it becomes important later. Eddie escapes a belly to back suplex and I have to make sure to look at the screen because the announcers are busy reading announcements like a public address system announcer.

Eddie stays on the knee and tries a Figure Four but Dean blocks the leg from going down. Now the hold goes on full and Tony bothers to talk about the match a bit. Dean gets to the rope and hits the floor. Back inside and Eddie takes over but loads up a tornado DDT which is countered by Eddie being thrown into the middle of the ring. Off to an abdominal stretch as Tony plugs the Adventures of Robin Hood TV series which debuts tonight.

Syxx is watching from the other side of the arena. Malenko hits a belly to back suplex for two. Eddie grabs a Gory Special but Dean counters into a sunset flip for two. Backslide gets two for Eddie. Victory roll gets two for Dean. Off to a test of strength position and Eddie climbs the ropes and hits a rana for two. This is getting really good. Eddie’s top rope double ax is blocked and they go into a series of standing switches, resulting in a braibuster by Dean for two. Eddie comes back with one of his own but gets on the ropes to look at Syxx so that Malenko can powerbomb him out of the corner for the pin.

Rating: B. Good match here as you would expect from these guys. As usual the announcers wanted to talk about anything not related to the match for the most part but if you block them out (a required skill to be a Nitro viewer) then you’ll have a good time with this match. Good stuff as always.

Hour #2 begins.

We get a clip from earlier of Giant breaking into the NWO’s locker room.

Super Calo vs. Konnan

Dang they really wanted to get Calo on this show didn’t they? Konnan takes him down and gets a rolling cradle for two. Calo speeds things up with an armdrag and dropkick to send Konnan to the outside. Suicide dive takes Konnan out and gets two back in the ring. Konnan hits a rolling clothesline and then kills Calo with a powerbomb. Then he does it again but Calo pops up in less than ten seconds.

Konnan goes and sits on the middle rope for no apparent reason other than to allow Calo to headscissor him down. In another weird bit, Konnan sends him into the ropes and Calo tries a cross body but Konnan doesn’t move an inch. The 187 (fisherman’s brainbuster) ends this clean. Too short to rate but there were some weird parts to this.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Chris Benoit

The Horsemen Split continues. While Benoit is on the way to the ring we get a promo from Sullivan in front of a chess board. He says he owns the board and he’s taking it back next week. More BREAKING NEWS: Hogan vs. Giant will be non-title because apparently a champion has to have 48 hours to prepare. Sweet Christmas where do they come up with these things?

Benoit takes him down to start so Jericho does the same thing and struts a bit. This is a rematch from Starrcade if you don’t remember that. Mongo and Debra come out after the fans all look towards the ramp. Heenan freaks out because something is going on then sees who it is and calms down again. Benoit takes him down with a clothesline and this is a very slow match.

We hear about a brawl in Louisiana between Jerry Sags and Scott Hall. Is there a reason they picked now to talk about that? Jeff comes back with a neckbreaker to load up the figure four but Arn yells at the referee for some reason. This allows Mongo to try to hit Jeff with the briefcase but he hits Benoit by mistake to give Jarrett the win.

Rating: D+. Not much here because this was just here to have the angle continue. Why in the world the Horsemen had to be broken up like this is beyond me, but I’d assume it was so that they would wind up being as forgotten as possible. I mean think about it: women are breaking up the Horsemen. Think about that for a minute.

Post match the Horsemen argue in the aisle. Benoit says we’re solving this tonight. Benoit says the Horsemen are an elite team and Mongo knows what being on an elite team means. If Mongo wants to keep being a Horseman, quit fumbling the ball because this isn’t looking like an elite team at all. Benoit was hand picked and Mongo became one due to an unfortunate circumstance. As for Debra, she can badmouth him but badmouthing Woman is just a bad idea. He insists Woman is all woman and he knows by experience.

Mongo says he made a mistake and that the case has won them a lot of matches. Benoit wants to know where Flair is. Anderson says this has to be solved because they’re a team. Benoit tells Mongo to shape up or ship out. Debra says she’d never gossip because she loves the Horsemen. Mongo gets in Benoit’s face but Anderson separates them. Benoit says he wants results and it’s time for the Horsemen to match his effort. This would carry on in one form or another well into the summer.

Scotty Riggs vs. Billy Kidman

Billy is just a cruiserweight jobber at this point. The announcers use this as time for another Hogan vs. Giant commercial. Scotty controls with the arm as Tony compares it to the Super Bowl. Kidman works on the arm now for a change as Bagwell in a new look comes out to the entrance. He says he’s buff. Kidman misses the 450 (Tenay calls it the shooting star for some reason) and Riggs wins with a fisherman’s suplex (Bagwell’s former finishing move) so that their old tag team music can play. Is he a jilted lover? Just there to have Bagwell come out.

The announcers talk about Hogan vs. Giant some more.

Lee Marshall is in Chicago.

Some singer is here.

Rick Fuller vs. Lex Luger

Fuller is of course an overly tall power guy because Luger doesn’t know how to face anyone else. They shove each other a few times and Fuller hides in the ropes to avoid getting punched. Fuller takes him down and drops a leg for two. He chops Luger in the corner but Luger Lexes Up, hits some clotheslines and Racks him for the win. Moving on.

Giant comes out and stares Luger down in the aisle. Nothing happens though because Giant is here to talk about the main event. Giant goes on a rant about how this is about him and how he wants the title. His theme is about books and how he was a bookend but tonight he’s closing the chapter. He wasn’t much of a talker so a basic theme like that was a good idea for him.

Arn Anderson vs. Rick Steiner

Arn uses wrestling skill for a quick advantage which is a rare thing to see against a Steiner. That pretty much stops working because of a belly to belly suplex that sends Arn to the floor. And now we hear the announcement about the ending of the show: we’re running low on time and JUST IN CASE we run out of time, make sure to watch the debut of the New Adventures of Robin Hood because we’ll show you the match during the commercials!

Anderson calls for help from the back but no one comes out. Shoulder block gets two for Rick. Arn keeps calling for help but we’re told that the Horsemen are fighting in the back. Anderson gets knocked to the floor and walks out for the countout. Enough short matches!!!

The Steiners are ready for Souled Out and the Outsiders.

Hulk Hogan vs. The Giant

Tony says we have six minutes of air time left and you know what’s coming. Hogan talks for awhile and says he doesn’t have to do this so Giant grabs him and starts the beating. The bell rings and we have a minuet of TV time left. Giant knocks him to the floor and Hogan says he’s done. Giant throws him back in and we’re out of time.

At this point, the show ends and Robin Hood would have begun. The idea was that the fans would watch Robin Hood and get to see parts of the match during the break. This would go on until the final break, meaning the match would go 45 minutes. Since I don’t think Hogan wrestled 45 minutes combined in 1997, you can probably guess that it didn’t go that way. Also, most people (myself included) watched something else and flipped back to see if the match was going on or not. The version I have airs it in one straight shot for the sake of simplicity.

Back with Giant chopping him in the corner. A clothesline puts Hogan down and giant no sells a low blow. Hogan hides behind the referee and it’s time for a test of strength. Giant steps on his hands and we take another break. Back with Hogan getting thrown back into the ring. There’s a slam but the Chokeslam is countered. The NWO runs in and it’s a DQ. The match itself was supposed to have run about 45 minutes but from what I can find, it ran about 6 minutes live.

Rating: D. I probably shouldn’t give it a grade based on my rules but I feel like I haven’t done enough during this show. The match was exactly what you would expect from these two in 1997 with Hogan doing nothing on offense while Giant tossed him around. The match at Souled Out would be a longer version of this.

Overall Rating: D+. This is a strange show indeed. WCW was in an awkward place at this point which is similar to the original Super Mario for NES. It’s like the big match that we’re told about and are teased with are on another show. The problem WCW had was that you never really got to the show that had those great main event matches. At the end of the day, Hogan was getting paid no matter what, Hall and Nash were getting paid no matter what, and so they had no point in putting any kind of effort in at all.

WCW never gave us the great main events they hyped up for months on end and finally, the people got tired of it. They gave us the matches they said we’d get (most of the time), but those matches were usually horrible. At the end of the day, it’s a wrestling show and sometimes, the answer to all your problems is to go and have good wrestling matches. That never quite connected in WCW’s main event scene.

Oh yeah this was about Nitro. This show did a good job of building up some of the matches for Souled Out but as usual, you’ll get so sick of hearing about the NWO and Hogan vs. Giant that you won’t care about the match when it finally happens. Also this parade of squashes really needs to end. This isn’t Superstars in 1987. The drama on these shows was great and it was easy to see why you would want to watch week to week, but the quality wasn’t there for the most part.

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Monday Nitro #69
Date: January 6, 1997
Location: Monroe Civic Center, Monroe, Louisiana
Commentators: Larry Zbyzsko, Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

So as I talked about, the Youtube channel I used got shut down and I don’t have any of those shows left. That being said, it means we’ll get to the PPVs and the Raws and Nitros a lot faster now. This is the beginning of a new year and we’re beginning to build towards Souled Out with the first man thrown out of the NWO, the Giant, challenging Hogan for the title. Let’s get to it.

Glacier vs. Bobby Eaton

We immediately start with a match which is a cool thing to see. Glacier takes him down with a leg sweep to start. An armdrag sets up an armbar (yes, a non kick from Glacier) which goes nowhere. Bobby tries a leap frog but Glacier rolls between his legs which results in Eaton landing on him. Glacier kicks hits a spin kick for two and another kick for the quick pin.

We recap the epic Bubba vs. Konnan feud. Tonight it’s a Mexican strap match between an American an a Cuban in Cajun country. Only in wrestling.

Big Bubba vs. Konnan

This is the touch all four corners style. Konnan slugs away but gets clotheslined down quickly. Bubba whips him very slowly and Larry sounds like he has a sore throat. Tony says Bubba is an integral part of the NWO. I hope his parents got him a dictionary for Christmas. Konnan hits him low with the strap so Bubba punches him in the face with the strap around his fist.

Bubba taps the first corner and Konnan jumps on his back with a sleeper. Bubba slaps two more corners along the way but Konnan breaks the momentum. Tony and Larry talk about what Piper was saying last week when he was leaving to avoid talking about his boring match. Konnan starts his comeback and uses the strap to take Bubba down. He gets two corners and has his momentum broken to further this. Konnan gets three but is kicked down. For some reason this doesn’t mean the momentum is broken so Bubba “punches” (you could fit a softball between his fist and Konnan’s face) him into the corner for the win.

Rating: F. See, this is what I don’t get: what reason is there for a strap match? It’s a feud that no one wants to see with two guys that mean nothing at all and the ending was stupid. The announcers didn’t care about it and this is the third week that this feud has been going on. Oh and the replay shows that Bubba’s hand was open so even if the shot had hit, it would have been more like a backhand slap.

Bubba beats him down post match to make sure the NWO looks strong.

Gene is with Kevin Sullivan and has a tape for him but Sullivan doesn’t want to see it. He says there’s something between the two of them that can’t be settled. Gene says the footage is of someone other than Benoit/Woman and Sullivan says it better not be before he leaves.

Here are the Horsemen minus Benoit. Anderson is upset that he’s not here but Flair implies that he’s off screwing Woman. Debra runs her mouth again about how great the rest of the team is and how they’re always here but Benoit never is. My goodness she’s annoying. Woman is ugly and fat apparently and Mongo is a professional. Speaking of annoying, here’s Jeff Jarrett to say he should get Benoit’s spot. Anderson vetoes that almost immediately because Jeff whines too much. Jeff says that Anderson has played second fiddle the whole year so he’s here to talk to the horse’s head, not the rear. Guess what happens.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Arn Anderson

Arn is in street clothes and beats Jeff all the way to the ring. Jeff comes back and gets sent to the floor but comes back in, hits a neckbreaker and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Flair goes after Debra for some reason and Mongo gets in his face. Flair has to break it up and this is making my head hurt. In case you can’t tell, Benoit isn’t around but that’s ok with Flair. Jarrett wants in and Debra thinks Jeff is cute so she supports his membership. Mongo supports who Debra supports but Anderson doesn’t want Jeff in and Flair is stuck in the middle. This is of course being done while the NWO is invading and the most elite group is too busy fighting because of Debra. Don’t you just love that Bischoff booking? Anderson walks out. He would only have one more match on Nitro so that’s one of his last walks out.

Souled Out ad.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Diamond Dallas Page

And there’s no Page. Regal comes out to new music and there’s a replacement.

TV Title: Steven Regal vs. Jim Duggan

These are old stomping grounds for Duggan who used to be a big star in Mid-South. The bell rings and the NWO comes out to take over commentary. Now we get the match going as I think Nash thanks his third grade teacher for making him awesome. Oh wait that’s Eric. Duggan takes over with clotheslines and the NWO implies Page has joined them. The match turns into a boxing match with Duggan taking over.

The talk turns to Souled Out because that’s what announcers in WCW do. They talk about the Miss NWO contest at the PPV as Duggan knocks Regal to the floor again. Duggan takes him down with a shoulder and I don’t think Regal has gotten a single shot in yet. Regal finally gets in some kicks to take over but Duggan punches him back. Off to a chinlock as the announcers talk about the WCW contract issues. Savage can’t join the organization apparently. The guys collide and Duggan gets the tape out. He knocks Regal out (referee is cool with it) but the time expires. The match would have run about eight and a half minutes.

Rating: D. Now I’m sure a lot of people are going to say “You just don’t get the point and the show is supposed to be about pushing the NWO.” Yeah, I do get that. However, it gets REALLY annoying hearing about it the whole show. It’s like Cole today: we get it but he keeps saying the same things over and over because we’re too stupid to get it the first time. It gets old in a hurry and it’s only going to get worse.

Duggan waves a WCW flag post match.

Jim Powers vs. Hugh Morrus

The announcers talk about Jim Duggan and how the NWO announcers wouldn’t talk about the Giant because they’re cowards. Powers hits his usual stuff which is mostly no sold. Morrus takes him down and the moonsault gets the pin. Basically a squash.

Hour #2 begins.

We recap the Horsemen split from earlier.

Rey Mysterio vs. Psicosis

Ok this has to be good right? It’s not that the matches so far have been bad but if they’re treated like nothing of importance, why should I care about them? When you have the NWO driven down your throat the whole time, you get annoyed by the matches which aren’t that great in the first place. They spin around a lot and Rey is sent to the floor. Psicosis hits a rope assisted moonsault but mostly misses to give Rey the advantage.

We hear about Liger winning the J-Crown but not the Cruiserweight Title because the match was signed before Dragon won that title. Makes sense. Psicosis takes over and hits a nice top rope spinwheel kick for two. Rey gets sent to the floor and Psicosis sets for a dive. After slipping the first time (but landing on his feet in the ring) he dives to the floor and slams his face into the barricade in a painful looking spot.

Liger vs. Dragon for the title is announced for COTC. Psicosis takes Rey down again and hits the guillotine legdrop (love that move) for two. A BIG powerbomb gets two and we hear about the Steiners coming back to challenge the Outsiders at Souled Out. Another powerbomb attempt is countered into a sunset flip with a bridge for two. Mysterio goes to the apron and hits the West Coast Pop for the pin. It’s as sudden as it sounds.

Rating: B-. Yeah this was good. First and foremost….well first and foremost the match was good. Second and secondmost, the announcers didn’t talk about the NWO the whole time. They talked about some other cruiserweight stuff, but at least it was related to this. That helped things tremendously here and the match was much more enjoyable as a result. Good stuff.

We get a clip from Starrcade of Eddie getting beaten up which apparently is the wrong clip.

Kevin Sullivan vs. Chavo Guerrero

We were supposed to see a clip of Sullivan at Starrcade hitting Benoit. They start fast and Sullivan doesn’t even take his robe off. Chavo gets sent to the floor but comes back with a missile dropkick to both Sullivan and Jimmy Hart. We get the aforementioned clip of Sullivan breaking a chair over Benoit’s head at the PPV. Things slow way down and Sullivan hits the Tree of Woe and double stomp for the pin. Too short to mean much but it wasn’t bad.

We get a clip of Hogan hitting Piper’s hip with a chair last week. Piper screamed incoherently the whole time he was taken out so we spend a few minutes trying to figure out what he was saying because it’s so important right? We even get EXCLUSIVE footage of Piper being put into the ambulance and Piper shouts even more. He’s since said it was the last night of his career. Right.

US Title: Alex Wright vs. Eddie Guerrero

Syxx stole the belt at Starrcade but Eddie faces him in a ladder match at Souled Out. They shake hands to start and exchange dropkicks with Wright’s knocking him to the floor. Back in and it’s time to talk about Hogan! Eddie takes him to the mat as some idiot says this is boring. The champ comes back with a kind of leg lariat and the slingshot hilo for two.

Off to an armbar (on the right arm for some reason) as this match is totally being ignored. Clothesline gets two for Wright and it’s off to a chinlock. Wright snaps off some European uppercuts and it’s back to the chinlock. Here’s Syxx to make sure our NWO quota is met for the segment. He sits on a ladder while wearing a belt and Tony says go up and knock him off of it.

Eddie looks at Syxx and walks into a northern lights suplex and then a backbreaker, both for two. Back to the chinlock for a bit and then Alex hits a top rope sunset flip for two. Spinwheel kick looks to set up a top rope double ax for no cover again. Northern lights suplex the sequel gets two. Alex goes up again but Eddie jumps up and hits a superplex for no cover again. Frog Splash keeps the title in El Paso.

Rating: B-. See, this is a good example of the opposite of what I was talking about earlier. This was actually interesting and a good match which just happened to have a lot of NWO talk in it. I can overlook the chatter when the match is good which this was. I’d love to see some more of these two with about fifteen minutes and less Syxx.

Road report from Lee Marshall. Did he ever actually do anything on Nitro other than this?

Amazing French Canadians vs. Harlem Heat

The Heat clears the ring to start and Tenay actually brings up the history between the managers. Stevie and Jacques start us off and Stevie controls with power. Booker comes in, misses an elbow but Spinaroonis up. Harlem Side Kick takes Jacques down but Oulette comes in to cheat. Back in and a piledriver gets two for Jacques. Stevie comes in off the tag and cleans house. The Canadians mess up with a flag and Stevie knocks Oulette out so a powerbomb/top rope elbow combo can pin Jacques.

Rating: C-. Not a bad match here but it’s the textbook (what class is that? I’d love to take it) example of a filler match. You had a good team and a bad team and the good team beat the bad team with a double team move. I’m not sure what else there is to say here but it wasn’t bad or anything.

We get a clip from Starrcade of Luger vs. Giant and Sting whispering something in their ears.

Lex Luger vs. Meng

It’s a power match of course with neither guy moving much off anything done to them. Meng runs him over and stomps away. Then he stomps some more. A piledriver puts Luger down for two. Lex comes back with the forearm and a powerslam for two. Meng misses a charge in the corner and there’s the Rack but the referee goes down. Barbarian runs in and takes a powerslam as well. He Racks Barbarian and that’s good for the submission. Tenay: “Does it matter?” Tony: “You’re right Mike it doesn’t matter.”

Rating: D. Just a power match here but not a very interesting one. The ending makes it even worse as it was just stupid. I can get the referee not noticing in a stretch but seriously? Tony and Mike saying it doesn’t matter? Wait why am I surprised by this at all? Nothing match and that’s the main event people.

Here’s the NWO for the big ending segment. Eric praises Hogan for beating Piper twice in a week and then Giant by himself. Hogan talks about a battle royal which either never happened or that I don’t remember at all. I think it was the former and that he was talking about the ending to last week’s show. Here comes Giant and the people are two rows deep on the apron.

Giant cleans house and has Hogan all to himself. The right hand is caught and Bischoff hits Giant in the back while his legs were wide open. Nice job Bruce Lee. Hogan gets in a chair shot and Giant goes down…again. The NWO beats him down for awhile and then go to the announce desk. Sting comes out and checks on Giant. Sting points the bat at the NWO and drops the bat to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. Not a very good show this week but there were two very solid matches which bring it up a lot. This is a good example of where you can summarize the issue the NWO story had: if you didn’t like that story, you were screwed. It’s annoying hearing about it all the time but at least we didn’t have to hear about how great Piper the savior was this week. It’s a better show than recently due to the two good matches but other than that, not much due to having too many squashes.

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WCW Saturday Night
Date: January 22, 1994
Location: Center State Theater, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jesse Ventura

Time for another of these. I found the next episode after January so we can keep going with this for a little while longer. Anyway, this is the go home show before the Clash so expect a lot of push for that. I think this is another 90 minute episode so this will be about as long as the previous one was. Let’s get to it.

There’s a six man main event with a heel mystery partner.

Nasty Boys vs. Ron Oates/Mark Starr

The Nasties are the tag champions and we get a quick word from Jack and Payne, their challengers on Thursday. Sags and Starr start things off and it’s domination early. Off to Knobbs who walks into a dropkick and armdrag as the jobbers clear the ring for a bit. Off to Oates who is a big guy. Not that it matters much as the good guys tag in and out a lot to work on the arm of Knobbs.

Knobbs runs him over to bring in Sags but he gets taken down as well. Finally some double teaming takes over for the Nasties and things slow WAY down. Everything breaks down and they be clubberin on Starr. Off to a chinlock by Sags but Starr gets up for a hot tag to Oates. And never mind as Knobbs kills him with a double ax. Brian splashes him in the corner and a top rope elbow from Sags gets the pin.

Rating: D+. This was way better than I was expecting. It’s a nice change of pace to have the jobbers get in some offense other than a few shots here and there. Not the best match in the world or anything, but I didn’t expect it to get almost seven minutes which made things a lot better here.

Colonel Parker says he’s got a mystery man that’s going to take care of Sting and Flair and Boss.

One of the commercials is for this new move Ace Ventura Pet Detective.

Here’s Flair who talks about giving his son the world title to take into his first grade class for show and tell. It’s more serious than it sounds.

Dustin Rhodes vs. Ricky Tango

That’s a great jobber name. This is your usual squash: Tango is all fired up but Dustin survives the offense and hits the big lariat to set up the bulldog for the pin.

Dustin says he’s ready for Steven Regal and the TV Title on Thursday. Regal has been badmouthing America and Dusty and that isn’t cool.

We go to the control center for the Clash to talk about the majority of the card. We see some clips of the Nasties beating up Jack/Payne on World Wide. Gene talks about the chicken suit match and we also get a clip of Simmons getting in a fight with Ice Train.

Shanghai and Slazenger talk about their match next week with Badd. If Shanghai loses, he takes the mask off.

Ron Simmons vs. TC Carter

Carter wants a test of strength so Simmons kicks him in the ribs for his efforts. Carter hits a dropkick and Simmons isn’t happy. Simmons clotheslines him down and demands a handshake. When Carter tries, Ron kicks him down. That’s awesome. Carter tries another comeback but Ron KILLS him with a shoulder and the spinebuster for the pin.

Ice Train comes out to offer another handshake but Simmons has nothing to do with it and walks off.

Parker runs his mouth about Pillman and Austin shows off his new managers’ license so he can be at Parker’s match on Thursday. Ron Simmons is announced as the mystery partner.

Jim Steele vs. Bob Starr

Oh it’s Jungle Jim Steele. Steele looks like a cross between Ultimate Warrior, Jimmy Snuka, and Tarzan. He was one of WCW’s 948 attempts to recreate Ultimate Warrior, but didn’t have the talent or charisma. A Thesz Press ends this quick.

Gene is in the crowd with some girls but he can’t talk about his news regarding Arn Anderson. But they can call the hotline to find out.

Vader vs. Al Phillips

I don’t like the jobber’s chances. What are you expecting here? Big powerbomb ends this in about a minute.

Vader wants Flair on Thursday. He gets him in a tag match and threatens to kill him. Rude comes in and says bring it on Sting.

2 Cold Scorpio/Marcus Bagwell vs. Tom Burton/Bill Payne

Burton and Scorpio start things off and they mess up a cross body spot that sends Scorpio crashing into the mat. He’s playing possum though and cleans house with Bagwell. Powerslam gets two for Marcus. Scorpio comes in for a corner splash and then we get a double superplex to Burton to kill him for the pin. Now that was a cool ending to a squash.

Pillman says Parker is going to wear the chicken suit. Parker broke up the Blondes and on Thursday, dinner will be served. He’s got a piece of chicken in his hand as he says this.

Rick Rude/Steve Austin/Ron Simmons vs. Sting/The Boss/Ric Flair

That’s a big main event. For some reason they come out to Boss’ music which is really slow and doesn’t do much to get the crowd going. Ice Train is here to yell at Simmons and Rude. It’s a brawl to start and the good guys clear the ring as you would expect. Train stays out there because Parker can. So what’s the point of the manager’s license thing then? Rude and Boss start things off.

Off to Sting as Boss hammers on Rude. We get a pair of atomic drops to Rude which is always funny. Off to Austin in a match that could have drawn millions in 98. Austin gets caught in an electric chair and his team hasn’t been having a ton of luck. Off to Naitch in what was supposed to be Starrcade 1994. Austin backdrops him but gets caught in a Figure Four attempt.

Boss comes in to work on the knee but gets caught by Rude. Rude tries a sleeper but gets caught in a jawbreaker. Simmons pulls the top rope down and Boss is sent to the outside. Simmons comes in to throw Boss around and the fans want Sting. Sting vs. Simmons could have been a huge feud. Austin breaks up the tag and Boss is in trouble. Back to Rude as they work on Boss’ back.

Here’s a bearhug but Boss shoves his way to the corner for a tag to Sting, but the referee misses it. Now Simmons switches places with Rude to hook on a bearhug. Simmons goes to the middle rope but jumps into a punch. There’s the tag to Sting who destroys Simmons with a powerslam for two. Everything breaks down and Sting pins Simmons on a rollup.

Rating: C+. When all else fails, throw six big names into one match and give them ten minutes. It works on Smackdown (kind of) with all those tag matches. This was pretty fun and it’s cool to see Sting vs. Simmons as they were the top faces in the company about a year prior to this. Not a classic or anything but for a TV main event this was fine.

Overall Rating: C+. For a go home show, this was pretty solid. The opening match was longer than expected so we got some ring time on this show which is rare for most TV. The Clash wasn’t that good if my memory is right but we’ll start up towards SuperBrawl after this one. After that, it’s almost Hogan time. Good show this week.

Here’s the Clash if you’re interested:

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NWA World Wide
Date: January 2, 1988
Location: Omni, Atlanta, Georgia
Attendance: 12,700
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, David Crockett

Smackdown is downloading so here’s something to fill in the time. This is World Wide which I’ve done a little bit of before and I rather liked it. This is early 1988 and I’d expect a lot of squashes. Sting is rapidly on the rise and would get his big break in late March, so expect him to be taking the Magnum route and crushing someone in about thirty seconds. Let’s get to it.

We open with Lex Luger taking his shirt off and shouting that he wants someone. Oh he wants Arn.

Opening sequence.

Larry and Baby Doll say they want Windham’s Western States Heritage Title. That’s Larry Z in case you’re confused.

Ricky Morton vs. Mike Force

Force jumps him but Morton grabs a backslide for a fast pin. Might have lasted 20 seconds.

Ad for the Bunkhouse Stampede. What a mess that was.

Ricky Morton stands up for America post match because he doesn’t like the Sheepherders running down the red white and blue.

Tony talks about the Bunkhouse Stampede which is a battle royal in a cage and you had to throw people out of the cage to win it. See how it’s kind of a mess? Jim Crockett comes in and announces that Hawk will get a title shot at that show. Dusty, the US Champion and one of the favorites going into the Stampede. He wants the money you win for the Stampede.

Ron Garvin vs. Thunderfoot #1

Thunderfoot, half of a team of masked guys, jumps Garvin in the corner but is knocked down, stomped and pinned in maybe 30 seconds.

Luger still wants Arn Anderson. Anderson drew first blood so Luger says no more.

Sting vs. Thunderfoot #2

I was right: Deathlock in 32 seconds.

Flair says that he’s awesome because he’s world champion and therefore better than anyone else. Michael Hayes has been running his mouth. Flair doesn’t like blue jeans and tennis shoes. He also doesn’t like defending the title against Hayes. As for Sting, he’s the new model that wants to replace Flair. That makes Flair laugh. Hawk can bring it on.

Eddie Gilbert vs. George South

This is also a squash but at least we get 90 seconds to it. The Hot Shot ends it quick. I know I’m leaving a lot out of it but what is there to say? Gilbert stalls a lot then hits the Hot Shot for the pin. That’s about it.

The Legion of Doom says they’ll be ready for the weightlifting challenge. Hawk says women and limos and jets don’t win the world title.

Arn Anderson/Tully Blanchard vs. Dusty Rhodes/Nikita Koloff

The former are tag champions and the latter are the US/TV Champions respectfully but this is non-title. Nikita and Tully start us off. There must be a million dollars worth of feuds in there. Tully tries power against Nikita so Koloff holds him in the air for awhile. Off to Arn and Anderson ducks to the floor to avoid the Sickle. We take a break and come back with the Horsemen on the floor again.

They come back in and Dusty takes them down on his own before putting Tully in the really bad figure four. Arn makes the save and takes a leg crank of his own. Arn gets in some right hands but Dusty pops up and slams him down. There’s a slam and Dusty hooks a sleeper. We take another break and come back with Anderson tagging in Dusty to work over Rhodes even more. The Horsemen work on the arm but Dusty manages a DDT out of nowhere to take Arn down. Off to Nikita who goes into Beast Mode. Sickle kills Tully but Arn makes the save as everything breaks down. Nikita is thrown over the top for the DQ.

Rating: C-. Not bad here as they were in the pretty standard face in peril formula. Nikita was awesome until the end of the decade when he had to get off steroids and lost most of his muscle mass. Either way, it’s cool to see the late 80s version of Koloff run over people. He was one of the top faces in the company at this point and was in main event feuds like this one.

Flair comes out to help in a Horseman beatdown but Lex runs in to take out Arn.

Paul Jones says his men (Powers of Pain) are stronger than the Road Warriors.

Big Bubba Rogers/Midnight Express vs. Kendall Windham/Mighty Wilbur/Italian Stallion

Wilbur is a BIG country boy. He and Lane start us off with Lane jumping into a massive bearhug. Off to Eaton and Windham which sounds a lot better than it really is. The Midnights double team as only they can. Cornette is on commentary to explain why they’re awesome. Here’s Bubba for about two seconds and here’s Eaton again. Kendall falls into a tag to the Stallion who hits the worst looking monkey flip I can remember in a long time. Bubba runs him over and there’s the Flapjack for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was a pretty common thing to see from the Midnights as they made an art form out of the squash. This was the six man variety and Cornette on commentary made it even better. Kendall was trained by his brother but just wasn’t nearly as good. Wilbur was too much like Norman the Lunatic for his own good I think which is why you never hear about him.

Overall Rating: C+. There are two ways to do shows like these. This would be the right one. This was so fast paced that it stays exciting. While most of these matches are squashes, they’re kept fast so no one has the time to get boring. That’s a very good idea and the whole show works better that way. Good stuff.

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Clash of the Champions 35
Date: August 21, 1997
Location: Nashville Municipal Auditorium, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Dusty Rhodes

Clash of the Champions more or less was WCW’s Saturday Night’s Main Event. They started it up to go head to head with Wrestlemania 4 and actually put a solid dent in it. The show went on for 9 years but by the end no one cared at all. The show was just worthless as there was already two hours of television a week so in essence we were just getting an extra Nitro two weeks a year, which is why this is the final one.

As for current storylines, this is at the height of the NWO’s power but Sting is looming. I think you know the story there. The main event is Luger and DDP vs. Savage and Hall. See what I mean about how this just isn’t that interesting of a show? Let’s get to it.

The opening video just runs down the card. Other than the stupid tag team main event this sounds pretty decent.

We get a clip of Dillon saying that Sting has until Thursday to make his demands as Sting had ripped up two contracts with match offers in them. Sting came through the crowd and got in the ring and the fans chanted Hogan. Sting pointed to the fans who were chanting it. This angle was freaking sweet. And then Hogan and his ego just had to kill it dead.

US Title: Jeff Jarrett vs. Steve McMichael

Jarrett used to be a Horsemen and stole McMichael’s wife Debra so Mongo wants to get the title to get some revenge or something. This was the epitome of a feud that no one wanted to see but would never die. Mongo is a Horsemen here meaning we get to hear the sweetest theme music of all time. Jarrett was neither interesting nor good at this time whereas Mongo never was either of those things so we’ll give it to…dang who do we give this one to?

Actually let’s just hope this ends fast. We take a break and come back with Jarrett throwing Mongo into the steps (His name was Steve Mongo McMichael in case you were wondering). Debra chokes him and I still couldn’t care less. The WCW midcard just completely sucked and while we were having Owen vs. Austin followed by Rock vs. Austin in WWF at this point for the IC belt, this just doesn’t hold up. Jarrett puts on a sleeper as a great visual representation for this match.

Mongo gets his own and Debra gets up on the apron. For no apparent reason Eddie Guerrero runs out with a belt and goes up top but hits Jarrett by mistake. Mongo covers for the title with ease. Debra tries to get him back and fails at it.

Rating: D+. At least it was short. These two feuded forever and no one cared ever. It just wasn’t interesting at all but they thought they could just slap the Horsemen name on it and get a good reaction from it through the south. There wasn’t much here though so the time was good if nothing else. Mongo held it for less than a month before Hennig turned heel and took it.

Alex Wright comes out and speaks in English and Gene warns him to speak in English which was stupid. It’s as simple of a promo as you could ask for. He has Ultimo Dragon tonight.

Gene is with the guys from a show called Dinner and a Movie. In essence they showed a movie and made food with a play on words of the movie title. It was an ok idea but why are these guys on a wrestling show? There’s your problem with WCW right there: too much corporate interference.

Stevie Richards vs. Raven

Raven “didn’t have a contract” at this point and insisted on wrestling only in No DQ matches. This is a grudge match or something as Richards was tired of Raven pushing him around. Richards had allegedly had a career ending neck injury but miraculously healed and showed up in WCW a few weeks later. They point out Raven’s ankle issue as he has a thing on his shoe to balance out the fact that his right leg is shorter than his left.

The Raven drop toehold hits to the chair as this is just a squash match so far. He throws in a bulldog onto the chair for good measure. Richards comes back with some decent stuff but at the end of the day he remembers he’s Steven Richards and the other guy is Raven and the best DDT other than Jake Roberts (who trained Raven) ends it.

Rating: C+. It was a squash and a quick one at that so we’ll just call it a bit above average for the DDT, which is the coolest move in history. Richards would be gone in like two weeks or so.

We get a cool video about Ultimo Dragon, explaining a bit of his history and his name. WCW hit the ball so far out of the park with this division that it’s insane. The name was called Ultimate Dragon but that was incorrect, as it was supposed to be Ultimo Dragon: Final Dragon, as in the final student of Bruce Lee, who he emulated in the ring. That’s the kind of thing that you just never get in WWE and it’s why the cruiserweights worked so well.

That and they never took them seriously. The shot of the J-Crown (8 titles from around the world which were defended on WCW television and included a WWF light heavyweight title that was active for 20 years but only in Japan, meaning that a WWF Title was defended on WCW television multiple times in 1996 and 1997) titles being piled up is just awesome.

TV Title: Ultimo Dragon vs. Alex Wright

When Dragon won the title a few weeks prior, it was the match where no one talked about the match whatsoever other than the final three count as the whole match was nothing but talking about the NWO. At the end they more or less said hey we have a new champion! Now back to what we were talking about. It was just ridiculous how that was all they talked about.

Wright was a guy that they tried so hard to push but it just never played out like they wanted it to. He was this young hotshot that was somewhat over as a face so of course they turned him heel and no one cared after that. Dragon really was underrated in the ring. In WWE they just threw him into the cruiserweight division and let him die off because that division sucked so hard it was pathetic. These two feuded for the better part of a year and I don’t think anyone ever cared.

There was no focus at all on the title or anything as it was always about the NWO. Dragon gets the Asai moonsault that he invented and does better than anyone else. The commentary is all about them as well which is NICE. We hit a very nice ending sequence as they fight over pins but Wright hits a SWEET German suplex for the pin and the title.

Rating: B-. This was a good match but just boring. The problem was that while these two had good matches, it’s Ultimo Dragon vs. Alex Wright. There’s just no heat at all and it’s not a great matchup while being a good match if that makes sense.

Cruiserweight Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Jericho

Eddie is challenging here and is freshly full heel. Eddie’s cowardly heel stuff of running on his knees always made me chuckle. How much commentary do you really need on a Guerrero vs. Jericho cruiserweight match? The Canadian goes for that running springboard dropkick to the guy on the apron that he uses a lot but slips and botches it badly.

I guess once a year is understandable. In a quick ending, they hit another fast series of pinfalls but Jericho actually keeps Eddie down and gets the pin. Eddie jumps him after the match.

Rating: C-. WAY too short here but we just had to have Mongo and Jarrett earlier instead of on Nitro right? The ending sequence was fun as always and these two just flowed together pretty well. They needed more time though and that’s why the grade is low.

Silver King/Villano 4/Villano 5/Psicosis vs. Super Calo/Juventud Guerrera/Hector Garza/Lismark Jr.

More or less the idea here is go out there and do a bunch of flips like you do every night without ever getting pushed more than a tiny bit against each other. This is Lucha rules, meaning if someone goes to the floor then they don’t have to make a tag for someone else to come in. I used to hate Mike Tenay but he’s worth his weight in gold here.

There’s no real point to saying who is in as they move in and out so fast that it’s hard to keep up with them. We hit the big pile on with everyone hitting their big over the top rope until Psicosis hits the guillotine legdrop off the top onto Super Calo for the pin.

Rating: B-. It was just over the top and ridiculous which is what these guys did best. This was very fun and it worked well as it always did. These guys were well paid to go out there and just get the crowd going and that’s what they always did.

The cooking guys join the NWO. Tonight is their one year anniversary but Hogan isn’t here tonight because he’s in Canada doing a Hollywood movie. That’s WCW for you. We go to a commercial and come back to DDP Diamond Cutting one of the movie guys.

Konnan/Syxx vs. Ric Flair/Curt Hennig

Hennig was kind of an associate Horseman at the time but soon he would join the NWO and injure Flair. If there was ever a guy tailor made to be in the Horsemen, it’s Hennig. Syxx (X-Pac) more or less beats up Flair but we’ll ignore the pop he’s getting for doing it. That doesn’t exist. Flair gets his knee knocked out as Hennig hits the Fisherman’s Suplex on Konnan to get the win. This was a five minute train wreck.

Rating: C-. This was just insane and it felt like it was about two minutes long instead of the five that it actually was. Hennig denies being a Horsemen but also denies not being a Horsemen while only saying one thing. He actually does this which is impressive.

He would go heel soon enough in another dumb move because he was perfect for the Horsemen. He had the look, he could talk, he was over, he had the attitude and he was great in the ring. Naturally he was thrown into the NWO and forgotten about.

WCW Tag Titles: Lex Luger/DDP vs. Randy Savage/Scott Hall

About ten guys come out for the NWO and they have their party for it being their birthday. Apparently Nash is letting Savage defend his half of the tag titles for no apparent reason. Yeah of course we just throw two guys together that have never teamed together before (according to the ring announcer) and give them a tag title shot.

In WWF they would have won the titles. People keep popping the balloons that the NWO dropped so it sounds like people keep shooting guns or something and it’s really annoying. And for no apparent reason everyone other than Nash leaves. It’s exactly what you would expect from a match where the titles simply weren’t going to change hands.

The faces dominate early on but then the heels take over to set up the hot tag. Luger gets Hall in the rack but takes an accidental Diamond Cutter and gets pinned. What else is there to say here?

Rating: C+. It’s ok and that’s about it. What more do you want here? They had an ok match that no one cared about on a show that not a lot of people actually watched. Are you looking for something huge here?

We come back and Bischoff talks forever and then the lights begin to flicker. They go off and we see Sting in the rafters with a vulture. The famous speech in a child’s voice follows and the lights go out again and the bird is on the top rope. The NWO is terrified and Nash pulls the belt back to swing it at him as we go off the air. Think about how stupid this was for the live audience for a minute.

Overall Rating: C-. You could see that this was about the name of the show and nothing more. Yeah there were four title matches but that happened at almost every Nitro. Yes two titles changed hands but who cares? It’s just not an interesting show as Nitro was lighting the world on fire on Mondays on a weekly basis. Ten years earlier this was an awesome idea but here it just didn’t hold up at all. Not bad, but only watch if you like this time in WCW. Otherwise it’s nothing of note at all.

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Clash of the Champions #34
Date: January 21, 1997
Location: Wisconsin Center Arena, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Attendance: 6,800
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Dusty Rhodes, Bobby Heenan

This is another of the prime time specials from WCW and one of the last ones. The NWO is in full control here and this show means nothing for the most part as everything was about Nitro. Also we were more or less in a deep freeze because everything was building to Sting vs. Hogan which was in about 11 months. This is also the go home show for Souled Out. Let’s get to it.

After some yapping we’re ready to start.

Cruiserweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Ultimo Dragon

Dragon is champion coming in here and Tenay is here for the sake of knowledge. Malenko has lost two in a row coming into this including one the previous night and the opener at Starrcade. The idiot that is known as Tony Schiavone keeps calling him Ultimate Dragon. They hit the mat and Dragon uses a bunch of spin moves to get out. They stay on the mat and we take a break.

The NWO now has its own hotline.

Back with them slugging it out. Dragon apparently lost the J-Crown at the January 4th show at the Tokyo Dome to Jushin Thunder Liger. This is a more hard hitting match than you’re used to with these two. Long vertical suplex gets two and it’s off to a head scissors on the mat. Dragon hammers away with kicks and Dean heads to the floor for a breather.

Half crab by Malenko and here comes Dean. Off to another leg lock and out to the floor. All Malenko here as he hooks on the figure four. Actually he doesn’t as Dragon blocks it for a bit. They speed things up a bit and it’s a spin wheel kick from Dragon to take Dean down. Dean grabs a superplex to take Dragon down and we speed it up even more. Powerbomb by Dean is reversed into a rana but we counter stuff even more.

Out to the floor and Dean is whipped into the railing. Asai Moonsault takes Dean down and the fans are into this to say the least. Back in and a top rope moonsault gets two for Dragon. Now all the fans turn and look at something else as Dragon gets a twisting rana off the top. Tiger suplex is reversed into a Cloverleaf attempt but that gets reversed. Another powerbomb is reversed into a butterfly powerbomb and a third Cloverleaf attempt. Down goes Onoo and the Cloverleaf ends this.

Rating: B+. Great stuff here as they were incredibly crisp with both guys working incredibly hard. The cruiserweight division was absolutely incredible at this point and Dean was at his absolute peak in 1997. Excellent match here with very little missing from it at all and an incredible opener. Bets on anything being good compared to this?

Mike Enos vs. Scotty Riggs

Neither gets an intro so what do you expect here? This is a very basic power vs. speed match and Riggs is here to look good before his match with Bagwell at the PPV. Both guys are incredibly generic and I see absolutely no reason for this to be here. A running forearm ends this for Riggs in about two minutes. Totally pointless match that gets no rating. Riggs says he’s the heart and soul of WCW. I can’t make this stuff up.

Here are the Horsemen, in this case Benoit and Anderson with some women. Oh and Mongo is there too. The fans of course want Flair. Benoit talks about how awesome he is and there’s a HUGE Benoit chant. Anderson says finish Sullivan tonight. Mongo (huge booing for the Bear here in Packer town). Debra says nothing of note at all.

Chavo Guerrero Jr/Chris Jericho/Super Calo vs. Konnan/La Parka/Mr. JL

Tenay and the other commentators say the Horsemen are having issues because Flair isn’t here. La Parka is replacing Psicosis who is injured and Jericho is replacing Juventud Guerrera who just no showed. This is under lucha rules, meaning if you hit the floor another member of your team can come in just like a tag. Chavo vs. JL to start with Jerry Lynn (what the JL stands for) destroying him.

Off to Konnan and Calo with Konnan continuing his team’s dominance. Calo was a guy I never liked or got the appeal of for the most part. We get some nice speed moves from those two with Calo looking kind of awesome actually. Off to Jericho and La Parka for awhile now and Parka is a bit nuts. Parka does a Spinarooni of all things but can’t keep Jericho down. Konnan comes in and it’s a Doomsday Device with La Parka throwing out a Whisper in the Wind instead of a clothesline. That was kind of awesome.

Konnan takes Jericho down and it’s off to Chavo. They are MOVING out there. Jericho vs. JL at the moment with Jericho taking over. Konnan comes in as does Chavo so there are four in the ring at once. Out to the floor and JL dives on Jericho. Chavo dives on JL and La Parka dives in general. Calo with a slingshot hilo to La Parka and in the ring JL gets a rana on Jericho for two. Jericho wants a superplex but settles for a super rana for the pin. Jericho looked like a star here.

Rating: B. Fun match here that was nothing but dives and speed. This is something you got in WCW that was great: they mixed up the styles every match almost. We’ve had a technical match, power vs. speed and now lucha libre. Not bad for 40 minutes. Jericho looked awesome here and of course would go on to mediocrity in WCW before becoming a legend in WWE.

Renegade/Joe Gomez vs. Harlem Heat

Guess what we’ve got here. Gomez is a guy that Is just kind of around while Renegade is the WCW version of Ultimate Warrior who hasn’t meant anything in about 18 months. Booker beats on Gomez for a bit and then Stevie and Sherri get to do the same. Axe kick to Gomez but Renegade comes in to get what passes for a hot tag. Harlem Heat destroys him and the Heat Seeker (Doomsday Device with a missile dropkick) ends him quickly. Just a squash.

Masahiro Chono vs. Alex Wright

Chono is NWO. He jumps Wright immediately but Wright charges back at him. Wright backflips off the top and gets an enziguri. Not in the same move mind you. He’s a dancer, not Spider-Morrison. The fans don’t really like either guy here. Wright can move and gets a leg lariat for about 9 but Nick Patrick won’t count with any speed at all.

Chono takes over again and throws Wright over the top which should be a DQ but isn’t here because Patrick doesn’t want to count. Sunset flip by Wright but the shoulder of Patrick hurts. Belly to back gets no cover and then Wright misses a cross body. Mafia Kick ends Wright pretty easily and the shoulder is fine of course.

Rating: D+. Just a quick match here with the idea being that it was a preview of what the PPV is going to be like. The match itself means nothing of course but it wasn’t really supposed to. Wright again continues to mean nothing at all but being a midcard jobber to the stars. Weak match but it got the point across.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Scott Norton

Patrick is the referee again. Eddie is US Champion here but doesn’t have the physical belt as Syxx stole it. Norton chops away and uses basic power to take over. Eddie goes after the knee and gets Norton off his feet like a smart man. He chops away which just makes Norton mad. Norton is NWO if that clears anything up. Here comes the power game again as I can remember the majority of this show from watching it when it aired.

Norton does something I haven’t seen before as he sets him for a suplex and just drops him without moving at all. No cover though as Norton is wanting to show off here. Big powerbomb puts Guerrero down again but a clothesline misses Guerrero and down goes Patrick. DDP, currently the fastest rising star in forever comes through the crowd and drops Norton with the Diamond Cutter and gets a huge pop. Frog Splash makes Patrick count the three with a hilarious look on his face.

Rating: D+. Well they did a great job here of making it seem possible that WCW had a chance on Satruday at the PPV. Not much of a match but it wasn’t supposed to be. Eddie, like Jericho, looked great here but that wouldn’t matter as we needed guys like Buff Bagwell to get pushes and the TV time.

Giant talks about Hogan. He’s in the dark here almost and talks about how Hogan paid Giant to be on the sidelines and keep him from taking out Hogan because no one can stop the Giant. He strikes a match and says that Hogan is like this match. It gave light, it gave some warmth, but eventually it gets blown out. At Souled Out, Hogan is blown out. I’ve always liked this promo and it’s still pretty awesome today.

Chris Benoit vs. Kevin Sullivan

Woman is here with Chris and looks pretty good here. This is falls count anywhere again. Kevin wants to start it on the floor and Benoit says let’s do it. They had another of these at the Great American Bash the previous year and it was totally awesome. They’re in the crowd almost immediately and are in the back quickly.

The first room is the men’s room and Benoit knocks a towel dispenser off the way with his head. Benoit throws a trashcan that hits Hart and the referee. This is almost move for move the same match as their Great American Bash match. Sullivan gets a clothesline for two as we’re still in the men’s room. Now we’re talking about an Andy Griffith movie.

Back into the arena and Benoit is kicked down the steps. Seriously, this is the SAME MATCH. Back in the ring and Benoit is in the Tree of Woe for the running knee. Double stomp to Benoit gets two. Woman comes in and cracks Sullivan with a wooden chair to end Sullivan and give Benoit the win. Well at least the ending was different I suppose. Also they didn’t swerve us.

Rating: B-. Well yes it’s a good match but legitimately over half of the spots are identical to the one at the Bash. Also the Bash’s ending was better and it went on longer. It also helps that we got to see it for the first time back then. Sometimes you need to see a semi-shoot like this though as it makes things more interesting, as it did here.

Benoit hits him with a chair again post match.

Amazing French Canadians vs. Steiner Brothers

The French Canadians are the Quebecers. Colonel Parker is with them in a French Canadian soldier outfit I guess. They try the Canadian national anthem but get cut off by Steinerized. The Outsiders injured Scott in a form of attempted vehicular manslaughter and this is his return. The Outsiders pop up on the screen to laugh at them with Nash implying he’ll come out here.

Scott has a new look here which would eventually be what he wore as a heel. The Steiners clean house to start and hit top rope clotheslines almost at the same time. We take a break and come back with Rick in some trouble. The Canadians beat him down and try their Cannonball move but Rick gets out of the way just in time. The Canadians seem to not tag at all. Here’s Scotty who destroys them both on his own. A French flag shot fails and the elevated DDT ends Oulette with ease.

Rating: C-. Without the commercial we saw about 3 minutes here so why not rate it. Nothing worth note at all as it was again really just a squash to set up the Steiners against the Outsiders at the PPV. Scott would be about to get pushed to the moon as a solo guy and get a major push. Anyway, this was domination.

Scott Hall vs. Lex Luger

Main event time here and Hall has a small army with him. Luger has the kind of rare black boots on. Luger does the pec dance and gets a toothpick in his face for his troubles. All power by Luger to start and he no sells the fallaway slam. A middle rope bulldog puts Luger down for two though and Scott works on the arm. Chokeslam puts Luger down but he’s up quickly.

Some fan shouts about oozing machismo which makes me smile a bit. He hits the floor and the numbers (I only see the number Syxx but whatever) catch up with him so that Hall can take over. Syxx interferes again with Nash distracting the referee. The clothesline from Syxx gets two. Now the fallaway slam works a bit better, getting two this time.

Off to the abdominal stretch as Luger is in trouble. Luger gets out of it after about a minute but misses an elbow and here comes Hall again. Luger comes back again and hits a slingshot dropkick of all things and lets loose his rather limited offense. Atomic drops and punches and clotheslines OH MY! No sign for the Rack yet but there’s one after a powerslam. Nash breaks it up but Luger fights both of them off. Where is WCW? Is there a good Old Maid game going on in the back? Syxx finally gets a shot in and it’s a DQ.

Rating: C. Just a main event match here with an unsurprising finish. At least they gave them some time here and we got a decent match out of it. Luger probably should have gone over but I guess they wanted the Outsiders looking as strong as possible going into the PPV. Not bad, but just kind of there for a TV main event.

The Steiners come out for the save from the beatdown.

Overall Rating: B-. Pretty good show here from a weaker period for WCW. There was some good stuff here but the bad is hard to overlook. The opener is great of course but there wasn’t much really good after that. The good outweighs the bad though and they build up Souled Out pretty well so I can live with this. Not bad but nothing great either.

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Clash of the Champions 33
Date: August 15, 1996
Location: Denver Coliseum, Denver, Colorado
Attendance: 8,304
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

We’re at one of the final editions of this show and it’s probably a good thing. This is right after Hogan won the world title as a member of the NWO and tonight it’s his first defense which is against Flair. This isn’t a terrible looking card on paper and I vaguely remember watching it when it aired. I’m on a WCW 96 kick for some reason so this isn’t completely off from what I just got done with. Let’s get to it.

We get a series of clips of Hogan destroying various people as head of the NWO, saying if he’d do things to Savage like he did then what would he do to Flair who he can’t stand? Good question.

Tony and Bobby talk for a bit and we get a video from Nitro with the Outsiders vs. Sting/Luger. The Horsemen came out for a save when Luger was down. This was around the time when Nick Patrick was about to join the NWO but he hadn’t quite done it yet. This was part of attempt #1 to get WCW united out of about 8375, none of which worked.

Crusierweight Title: Dean Malenko vs. Rey Mysterio

Mysterio had won the title on Nitro the night after Hogan turned and this is a rematch. Tenay shows up for this one. Rey is AWESOME at this point given that his knees are still in their original form here and he’s about 40 pounds lighter before steroids happened. Yeah young fans, the Rey you see today is a giant compared to what he debuted as.

Dean jumps him before the bell and the beating is on. He’s relatively heel here but only as heel as he could get. Rey speeds things up, flying all over the place for a bit to tick Dean off. He speeds up again and takes over with ease. The move that would become known as the 619 is still a taunt here and Rey tries to get at Dean’s mind with it.

Dean slows things down and hits a slick move by setting for a powerbomb and dropping back into a hot shot. JUMPING brainbuster should kill Rey but it only gets two. Cool move by Rey as he gets a running start, grabs Dean and rolls backwards into a Fisherman’s suplex for two. Chinlock goes on by Dean to slow things down. We take a break and Tony says if anything happens we’ll show you. No replay is shown so did they just stand there? Was it a game of freeze tag?

Rey gets a running start and gets LAUNCHED into the air but lands on the middle rope. After catching his balance for a second he backflips off, starting an insane pinfall reversal sequence. That’s reminiscent of one of my all time favorite spots. Shortly after Rey debuted in WWE he was facing Noble on Smackdown.

Jamie threw him over his head (more or less throwing Rey into a leap frog) and Rey landed on the middle rope, didn’t stop for a second and bounced backwards, catching Noble in a rana into a pin. Noble totally telegraphed it but who cared man. That was insane and my jaw hit the floor when I saw that, which does not happen with me. We start talking about Nick Patrick and how he’s apparently become white. And black. That joke didn’t work as well as I wanted it to.

Dean with a leg lock that gets him nowhere. Oddly enough Dean is winning with power here. Rey sends him to the floor and gets a HUGE tope con hilo into a senton. He more or less botches the heck out of a Lionsault off the guardrail but to be fair the big spot just before that makes up for it. Springboard version of the West Coast Pop (doesn’t have that name here) gets two. Now we’re talking about the tag titles for no apparent reason at all.

One of Dean’s signature moves is a gutbuster out of a fireman’s carry off the middle rope. The problem here is that Rey weighs 130lbs soaking wet with a brick in his pocket, so when Dean elevates him for it he loses his grip on Mysterio so there is NOTHING to protect Rey as his ribs hit Dean’s knee. That looked incredible. He covers Rey who gets his foot on the rope. The referee counts three anyway but then waves it off. Rey uses the distraction to get the pin on a victory roll.

Rating: B+. This was AWESOME. You had Dean LAUNCHING Rey all over the place, making it look like Rey was flying. The big dives from Rey were top notch and that gutbuster looked incredible. Dean’s timing on that was great too as he had to move his knee into position to have Rey land on it. Great match here and very fun. Unfortunately we have to watch the other 78 minutes of this show.

Glacier is still coming. Holy sweet merciful crap that was one of the biggest bombs of all time. His entrance alone cost over half a million dollars and we had to deal with six months, yes I said MONTHS of vignettes hyping him up.

V.K. Wallstreet vs. Jim Duggan

Get it? VKM, obsessed with money, wears a suit a lot? Yeah it was crap. It’s Mike Rotunda, aka IRS. What does the R stand for anyway? There are fans with an NWO banner and Heenan isn’t sure what to think of that. These two are feuding apparently. Duggan gets a wristlock but Wallstreet gets the ropes. He looks at the camera and says he’s too smart for Duggan who is right behind him. Nice one dude.

Naturally we’re talking about Hogan vs. Flair almost nonstop here. After some basic back and forth stuff we hit the chinlock. Jawbreaker gets Duggan out of trouble. This is incredibly dull. Duggan gets a slam and tries to tape up his fist which was a thing he was doing at the time so the referee tries to stop him. In the ensuing chaos Wallstreet rolls him up for the pin. What the heck ever man.

Rating: F+. Just boring beyond belief here with nothing special going on whatsoever. This was one of those feuds that happened and I don’t think anyone actually remembers it. GrantedI don’t think anyone remembered it as it was happening either. Either way, this was dull and a waste of 5 minutes counting introductions.

The Nasty Boys say they’re going to fight. They’ve been having issues with the NWO who they would soon try to join or maybe they already did. Knobbs says they want the gold. Oh and they should be in the triangle match for the titles.

After a break we’re with Gene again who says that earlier he and Tenay were interrupted by the Outsiders and wound up interviewing them. Want to know what was said? CALL THE HOTLINE!!! Oh dear.

Ultimo Dragon vs. Konnan

Naturally they call him Ultimate here because they’re stupid. Thankfully Tony and Mike say the right name but his graphic says Ultimate. Konnan is in regular trunks here which is weird to see. Nick Patrick is the referee here so I’d bet on a lot of the focus being on him because a referee is more important than the wrestlers.

Konnan dominates to start, taking Dragon to the mat and getting an insane looking deathlock/Cloverleaf on him. Dragon’s arms were between his legs and it looked painful. He hits the floor and we hear about how Konnan is all bitter over losing his US Title, which would lead to his heel turn. HEY! That’s a great way to start talking about Hogan!

Dragon sends him to the floor and Sonny lays in some decent kicks of his own. Somehow the referee has no issue with this at all either. Dragon takes over and gets a moonsault and a majistrol cradle for two. Konnan rolls through a German Suplex and uses the tights to get the very fast win. Under three minutes so no rating but this wasn’t anything special at all.

There’s a really old school internet chat going on and Ice Train is there. It’s on Compuserve of all things. Scott Norton, his old partner, jumps him there.

Meng vs. Randy Savage

This should be dull. Savage is badly injured here. Actually scratch the here part as there’s no Savage. That rock version of Pomp and Circumstance is pretty awesome to listen to though. Not so good to put on toast. Savage is too injured to wrestle so it’s a forfeit. Fans are not happy to say the least.

The Dungeon of Doom comes out to talk. Sullivan talks about how he’s never been a fan of Hogan and never praised him. He’s always told it how it is about Hogan and wants an explanation from Gene about him supporting the entire time. Jimmy cuts him off to say how great the Dungeon is…and a Leprechaun is here. No one talks about him but the camera shows him running all over the place. Apparently that’s Dwayne Bruce, the guy that ran the Power Plant and trained Goldberg. Yeah that’s it.

Bull Nakano vs. Madusa

These two had some great matches in Japan so this should be good. Madusa starts off very fast but can’t get much going. Nakano grabs her by the hair and spins her around the ring by it. That has to freaking hurt so she does it again! Nakano hits her with knunchuks twice and the referee is all cool with it apparently. Madusa totally botches a cross body, hitting Nakano in the feet. Top rope double axe handle to the floor kills Sonny (manager) who then kicks Nakano by mistake for the pin. This was very short but sloppy beyond belief. Terrible match indeed.

Flair and the girls say tonight it’s Flair vs. Hogan with Flair talking about how this is about being the best. He has zero chance to win the title but at least he’s acting intense. Flair says he has the Horsemen backing him up. Liz is so much hotter in the leather jacket and regular shirt than the dresses it’s unreal.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Eddie Guerrero

This is for the Battlebowl Ring which is apparently a defendable title. Page is on the brink of the push of a lifetime as he would become the first guy to turn down the NWO and become the hottest face in the company for about a year. He has the look down here too. Eddie starts off fast of course but Page takes him down early. Guerrero’s shoulder hits the post so Page stomps on his ribs. He was still learning here.

Page gets a nice spinout gutbuster for two. Heenan still complains about the lack of arm work. DDP has an earring in his ear and Heenan suggests that Eddie rips it out. Brain could be a bit evil at times. They slug it out and Eddie pounds away, winning that aspect of the match. Batista Bomb gets two for Page. Page sets him for a top rope suplex but Eddie knocks him off and gets the Frog Splash for the win and the ring. Diamond Cutter post match and Page keeps the ring. More Diamond Cutters hit and Chavo tries to save which fails as well.

Rating: C-. Not much of a match here but it wasn’t bad. These two feuded forever with the idea being to get Page much better as a result. It kind of worked but the people were tired of the feud once it was over. Anyway, they would meet again for the US Title at Starrcade and then Page would turn and everything would get awesome.

Hogan pops up to yell at Gene. He talks about how there can only be one great one and starting tonight…nothing apparently. This is rather pointless indeed.

Glacier is STILL coming. Exact same ad from earlier.

Chris Benoit vs. The Giant

Ok this has to be good right? It’s Benoit. Woman is helping Benoit out of his vest so Giant DROPKICKS him in the corner. Keep in mind that the Giant is more commonly known as Big Show. He’s still lean here and one of the most amazing athletes you’ll ever seen. This is the Giant that could have destroyed Andre, not the big oaf you see today. Giant immediately grabs him and gets the BIGGEST CHOKESLAM EVER, with every bit of Benoit above the post for the easy pin in 30 seconds if you stretch it out. Ok then.

Tag Titles: Sting/Lex Luger vs. Steiner Brothers vs. Harlem Heat

Heat are the champions here. This is a triangle match which has some different rules depending on what year it is. This time it’s one fall to a finish and you have to tag in and out. Sometimes it would be elimination, some times it would be three guys in the ring at once, sometimes it would be like this. You never could tell for sure. Ok, please give us something watchable here. I beg of you.

Scotty and Booker start us off. Luger drills Booker with a clothesline to take him to the floor and he’s shaken up. Scott, like an idiot, tags in Luger. If his team isn’t in the match, they can’t win the titles. Well he does have to dumb himself down so maybe that has something to do with it. Stevie in now and they take turns slugging each other down in the corner.

Rick tags himself in and kills Stevie with a Steiner Line. Top rope bulldog gets two as Luger breaks it up. We take a break and are back with Booker and Rick but Sting tags himself in to beat on Booker. There’s an interesting matchup. They alter the top rope rule again so Sting isn’t disqualified. Off to Luger now as the superstars are in control. We get into the psychology part here as everyone keeps breaking things up.

Scott REACHES to get a tag to bring himself in to beat on Sting. Sting has on purple and yellow. Must be an alliance with Cena. Back to Luger as this is getting more like a brawl by the second. Rick gets a nice reverse German suplex as we hear about how the air this high off the ground could be a factor. That’s rather true actually. Luger gets a fireman’s carry which is called the Rack for no apparent reason.

Everything breaks down and it’s Booker vs. Scott in the ring still. Everyone else is fighting in the aisle and here come the Outsiders! They beat the heck out of everyone else but the key thing here is that Nick Patrick does not see it. Scott gets the Frankensteiner but Patrick sees the Outsiders leaving and call that a DQ to throw the match out. Scott is right: that’s nonsense.

Rating: C. The match was starting to get good by the end but of course the referee is more of a focus than the match so we’ll go with that instead. This isn’t much to talk about as far as the ending goes, but the rest of it was pretty good. It’s nothing I’ll remember in half an hour but it was ok while it lasted.

Gene talks to Patrick who says that it was a DQ. Gene says that it shouldn’t have been because it wasn’t in the ring. So freaking what? So if Nexus comes down and beats the tar out of Cena but doesn’t get in the ring it’s legal? Yeah this is rather stupid and Patrick is right here.

WCW World Title: Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan

Oh look it’s this match again. They talk about the 4th member of the NWO being around but no one knows who he is. It would be DiBiase which would actually save WWF in the long run as it freed up Austin. Fifth would be Giant. Both try to get in each other’s heads which only kind of works. Flair grabs a headlock as Tony tries to convince us that Flair is nervous. That’s very funny.

Hogan struts a bit as this is Larry Z levels of stalling. I love hearing Bobby go off about how he told us all so about Hogan for years. The match is two minutes old and we’ve had maybe 30 seconds of contact. Flair gets in chops and punches to take Hogan down to the floor and he’s very frustrated.

Out to the floor now with Hogan in control. They’re trying to make this out to be a huge match but it’s the same thing we’ve seen so many times before. That was an issue I always had with the NWO. Both guys had been in WCW maybe five years earlier and probably a lot less than that. Also it’s not like they were brand new as everyone knew who they were, but all of a sudden we’re supposed to be terrified of them?

Hogan works over Flair on the floor and mainly his back, but Flair gets him back into the ring and lands a suplex. Hogan, for perhaps the only time ever that I can remember as a true heel, Hulks Up complete with the basic offense. I’d love to have him do that more often I think. He was almost unbeatable with that so why not keep doing the same thing he’s done for years?

Legdrop misses and Flair goes for the leg. SHOCK AND AWE SHOCK AND AWE SHOCK AND AWE: HE GOT IT ON THE PROPER LEG!!! I have never seen him do that in his entire career! Flair gets the hold on the leg that Hogan just hurt and the champ is in trouble! After an attempt at a reversal, Hogan shoves the referee and cue NWO for the big beatdown. The Horsemen, Sting and Luger hit the ring for the save.

Rating: C-. This was your traditional Hogan match from this era: punch, punch, punch, scratch, punch, punch, leg drop. The Hulking Up thing was a nice add-on here though and while it’s not their worst match ever, these two never had that big epic awesome match that they were supposed to have. The matches tended to go downhill after a decent first WCW meeting.

Tony and Bobby wrap things up.

Overall Rating: D-. The lack of failure is only for the great opening match. Aside from that this is one of the weakest shows I can remember in a long time. They did nothing for the most part as everything ended in a DQ or was like three minutes long. Yes they had 9 matches, but when only one is good and two are ok and the other six are bad, what’s the benefit there? WCW was running on pure drama and hype at this point and it’s very clear here. Terrible show but at least it was relatively short.

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