Spring Stampede 1999
Date: April 11, 1999
Location: Tacoma Dome, Tacoma, Washington
Attendance: 17,690
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan

This is the final part of the WCW stretch thank goodness. These past two shows have just killed me as they’ve been completely awful. This show HAS to be better than those. I mean the law of averages has to catch up with WCW eventually right? The main event tonight is a fatal fourway for the title with Hogan vs. Nash for Flair’s title. Oh and Goldberg vs. Nash. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is just a clip reel of the four guys in the main event.

The set is an old style one almost like Nitro but with a Spring Stampede logo and set to it. I like it.

Blitzkrieg vs. Juventud Guerrera

I’ve heard a ton of great things about Blitzkrieg but I don’t remember him that well. Apparently he’s one of the more insane high fliers ever. I’ve heard his music before somewhere but I can’t place it. The winner faces the Cruiserweight Champion tomorrow night. They shake hands pre match and the crowd is hot. They go to the mat quickly and Juvy might have pulled his mask a bit. Well if you wear one it might get pulled you lunkhead.

They speed things up and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two for Blitzkrieg. Blitzkrieg pounds away in the corner but Juvy comes back with a springboard dropkick to take over. Blitzkrieg goes outside so Juvy hits a great dive to the floor. Brainbuster gets two. Here’s a surfboard which always amazes me. Blitzkrieg speeds things up and hits a spin kick. A dropkick puts Juvy outside and Blitzkrieg sets for a dive but Juvy sees it coming and dropkicks him out of the air.

Back in and Juvy is sent out again. HUGE spinning moonsault by Blitzkrieg kills him and they go back in. Things speed up and they bust out some slick counters. A move we would call Yang Time misses for Blitzkrieg and the Juvy Driver is countered as well. Blitzkrieg tries what I guess you would call a spinning hurricanrana into a victory roll driver out of the corner for two. They go up again and Juvy counters the same move into a Juvy Driver off the middle rope for the pin.

Rating: B. Again, the old school WCW formula works: a big fast paced match to open the show with two guys just going insane out there. Blitzkrieg would only be around a few months and never really had a big match with Mysterio that I remember, which is a shame because it would have been awesome. Good stuff and better than most of the usual stuff from this division.

After a quick recap of Hak vs. Bigelow, here’s your generic hardcore match for the night.

Hak vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Hak comes out carrying a table and wrapped in barbed wire. He is, not the table. The brawl begins on the floor and they go to the wagon. Hak has hidden a table under there. Well of course he has. He hits a HUGE swanton off the wagon through the table. Chastity, Hak’s chick, gets the gimmicks (Tony’s term for weapons) out and Bigelow shrugs the dive off.

Back to ringside and they hit each other with various metal objects. Tony flat out says that trashcans don’t hurt that badly. What’s with him tonight? Bigelow whacks Hak with said painless can then a kendo stick shot. There’s a plastic salad bowl to the head. They botch what I think was a suplex and Bigelow falls on Hak’s knees. Out to the floor and here comes a ladder.

Hak dropkicks it into Bigelow and then hits another Swanton onto the ladder onto Bigelow. Now he busts out a piece of a barricade and the table falls to the floor. The ladder is up in the ring and the table is like a bridge between the ring and barricade. Hak climbs up for no apparent reason and goes crashing down through it. Back in the ring there’s a barricade in one corner and a ladder in the other.

Hak gets crotched on the barricade which Bigelow picks up. He stands there with it forever because Chastity is late with the extinguisher. The distraction lets the White Russian Leg Sweep put Bam Bam down. And then he hits what’s supposed to be the Greetings From Asbury Park (single shoulder sitout Tombstone) off the middle rope through the table but it was more like a powerslam. Either way it ends things.

Rating: D+. Not bad but this was just another hardcore match in WCW. Neither guy was worth anything other than this but it filled in a little over ten minutes. The ending bump was pretty solid but the match was nothing memorable at all, which is the major problem with this division as a whole. In WWF, they were bad but they were funny. These just aren’t that good.

Mikey Whipwreck vs. Scotty Riggs

Riggs is a narcissist style character here. I have no idea why this match is happening but that’s WCW for you. Riggs dances around like Rick Rude and tries to show Mikey up. There’s been practically no contact in the first minute. Mikey slaps him in the face and it’s the Cody Rhodes idea where he’s freaked because his face was touched. Riggs is knocked to the floor and this is nothing to see.

Mikey puts his throat over the bottom rope and hits a slingshot legdrop. A rana off the apron drives the top of Riggs’ head into the floor. Get this over with already. Another attempt at the legdrop misses and Mikey goes into the railing. Dropkick takes him down and I put on a Jimmy Stewart movie from the 30s. A quick chinlock gets a big BORING chant. Mikey hits a middle rope dropkick for two. And then Riggs hits a forearm for the pin.

Rating: F. If Scotty Riggs getting a featured match on PPV in 1999 wasn’t enough, the match was terribly boring. The problem here was that no one had any reason to care about these guys and Riggs was in a nothing gimmick that we had seen a million times before. I mean how many times have you seen a character that is obsessed with his looks and talks about how pretty he is?

We recap Disco Inferno vs. Konnan. Konnan had a music video which Disco made a parody of. There’s your match.

Konnan vs. Disco Inferno

Oh and Disco is in the Wolfpack here….kind of. Konnan makes what I presume are gay jokes about Disco’s looks to start. Disco imitates Konnan and hits his rolling lariat. He goes up but Konnan shakes his crotch at him so Disco hops down. Ok then. Konnan takes over and hits his seated dropkick. Konnan has a big bandage on his head which I missed before. They’re both in camo pants. K-Dawg climbs the corner with a running armdrag. Not bad.

Off to the chinlock section of the match. Can we vote to get that removed? It happens in almost every match and it’s really dull. Disco hits a middle rope elbow for two. Konnan gets sent to the floor and this has been almost all Disco. I think he finally realizes he’s fighting Disco Inferno and comes back with the 187 (fisherman’s DDT) for two. Disco gets the same off a neckbreaker. After a bunch of clotheslines miss, Konnan hits Disco’s own finisher the Last Dance (Stunner) for the pin.

Rating: C-. Oddly enough this was better because of Disco. Had he had a workable gimmick and maybe a name change, he could have been a decent midcard guy. The problem is he’s most famous for the idiotic character and he never could escape it. Still though, he wasn’t half bad here.

We recap Kidman vs. Mysterio for the Cruiserweight Title. Rey took the title from Kidman, and they’re also tag team champions. This is the rematch.

Cruiserweight Title: Billy Kidman vs. Rey Mysterio Jr.

Winner gets Juvy tomorrow night. They do some nice flips to start without much damage being done. Rey gets a headscissors and has a small advantage. Kidman hits one of his own and the first two minutes or so are a stalemate. Rey gets backdropped to the floor and there’s a dive which gets very little reaction. Kidman takes over and Rey goes into the barricade. That’s a surprising amount of violence from two face champions that are smaller guys.

Now Rey sends him back to the floor. Kidman shows off some impressive strength and catches the Asai Moonsault attempt. Rey goes into the steps and both guys are getting mad. Lionsault gets two for the champ. Another rana attempt is countered into a running powerbomb. The crowd is pretty silent for this and to their credit it’s a pretty slow match so far. BK Bomb gets two. They go to the floor and Kidman hits a Shooting Star off the apron.

Back in the World’s Strongest Slam puts Rey down but Kidman jumps into a dropkick. The fans sound like they’re at a golf tournament that doesn’t have Tiger Woods in it. They both go to the top and Rey hits a top rope bulldog for two. I really don’t understand this crowd. The match isn’t a classic or anything but they’re hitting some BIG spots in this. Kidman hits the chinlock and the fans don’t react at all.

After a quick trip to the floor, Rey takes over again. He dives into a clothesline though which is a nice little nod to earlier in the match. The crowd again does not care. Heenan talks about Rey’s fatigue pants and how there are a bunch of pockets in them. “Wouldn’t it be fun to load those up with illegal objects?” Tony and Mike of course use that to talk about Hak and Bigelow, because they don’t get the idea of a heel commentator. Bobby might as well be running with an anchor.

Rey gets a facejam for two. He looks like he’s about to cry. Mysterio gets taken down into position for a Shooting Star but he’s playing possum. Kidman counters his whatever into a sunset bomb off the top for two. AND THE CROWD STILL DOESN’T CARE. Rey counters a wheelbarrow suplex off the top into a sitout bulldog for two. That’s what he won the title with in the first place. A top rope Fameasser and standing moonsault get two for Rey. Kidman blocks a powerbomb and tries another shooting star but Rey breaks it up again. There’s a top rope rana into a rollup for the pin for Rey.

Rating: B-. I really want to understand the issues with the crowd here. This wasn’t a classic or anything but it was really a pretty good match. The near falls until the end were really hot and the crowd just sat there. I don’t know if they were burned out by a weak stretch of matches or what but I was really confused by it.

We recap Raven/Saturn vs. Malenko/Benoit. The Horsemen were tag champs and were fighting Raven 2-1 for some reason. Saturn came in to help and got a submission but it didn’t count for some reason. Raven and Saturn cost the Horsemen the titles so this is a grudge match. See how easy it can be to set up a non-title feud?

Raven/Perry Saturn vs. Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit

Anderson is with the Horsemen here. Raven and Saturn bring out a table. Oh and if you don’t believe WCW went on talent raids in ECW, I present you with this match. Saturn is in a leather skirt because of some big thing with Jericho. The fans are all over the Horsemen already. Dean stalls to start and MAN the fans are on him. Oh ok he’s stalling on the apron so much because Benoit is starting.

The Canadian sends him to the floor and Saturn sends the Horsemen into each other. Off to Raven as Benoit gets beaten down. Benoit dropkicks Raven to the floor so Anderson/Malenko can double team him. Something like a double spinebuster puts Raven down and they work on his legs/hamstrings. The crowd pops more for a Raven kickout than anything in the previous match.

Lil Naitch is refereeing so he just happens to miss Raven’s small package on Benoit. Clothesline gets two for Benoit and Robinson seems to be counting faster than usual. He stops Saturn from coming in and gets great heat. Saturn comes in and cleans house but Malenko takes him down with a right hand. A modified Doomsday Device by the non-Horsemen gets two as Benoit grabs Rolling Germans on Raven.

Malenko hooks the Cloverleaf on Saturn but he makes the rope. Great drama so far in this. Death Valley Driver hits Malenko but Benoit comes in PERFECTLY to break it up with a Swan Dive which also gets two for Malenko. Things settle down again and Benoit works on Saturn’s leg. Malenko comes in with a sleeper and body scissors. Raven breaks it up and things break down a little again.

After a northern lights suplex we go to the floor where Dean kicks Saturn in the ribs a few times. Back inside and he comes in legally for a change. Chinlock goes on now but I can live with this one as they’re probably getting tired. Raven finally comes in and is on fire. He had a tendency to not be in the ring that often but when he was he was incredibly energetic.

Someone throws in a chair and Raven hits the drop toehold onto it with Benoit’s head going in. Anderson pulls Dean off a table on the floor so Saturn goes through instead. Even Flow takes Dean down but Anderson interferes, allowing the chair to be put on Raven’s head so Benoit can hit a Swan Dive to the chair to Raven’s head and Malenko gets the pin. Great match.

Rating: B+. That’s probably high but I was really getting into this one. The ending is good too as the Horsemen cheat to win and the heat on them was great. Excellent match as they gave four very talented guys time and a story and you got a very good match out of it. If WCW could get that that was the idea of exciting wrestling, they might still be in business today.

We recap the US Title match. Hall had been US Champion but got legit hurt so we had to have a new champion. A tournament started and after some Jericho shenanigans, he didn’t make the finals. Instead it’ll be Booker, the TV Champion, against Scott Steiner. Stevie Ray might be in his brother’s corner here but it’s not entirely clear.

US Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

Scott gets in an argument with a fan as the fan’s girlfriend keeps rubbing his chest. Funnier than it sounds. This goes on for a good while as Steiner keeps yelling at fans. Steiner finally gets in the ring and then goes to the ropes to avoid fighting. Back to the floor and now Steiner jumps into the crowd. Steiner finally comes in and taker Booker down with ease.

Booker speeds things up and hits AJ Styles’ drop down into a dropkick to send Scott to the floor. Steiner pounds him down some more and this is looking like it’s not going to be particularly interesting. A clothesline off the apron puts Scott down again as this has been back and forth. Steiner tastes the steel but manages to crotch Booker out of the corner. Out to the floor for some chair shots and we head back inside.

Now we get the push-ups. He shoves the referee and this is going nowhere. There’s a Steroids chant. Belly to belly gets two. Now Steiner just openly chokes the referee and kicks Booker low which isn’t a DQ due to the referee being scared. Steiner has to stop to pose because we need a break or something. Off to a bearhug which is probably the last thing this match needs.

Booker starts to escape but gets caught in a belly to belly drop on the head. It was supposed to be a suplex but it just wasn’t. A DDT puts Scott down and HE ACTUALLY SELLS IT!!! Take a lesson Rick. Booker comes back with some strikes and he goes up top. And there goes the referee. The fans immediately look at the entrance ramp, which shows how jaded they are.

Booker makes his real comeback and hits the axe kick but there’s no referee. Down goes the referee for a second time and Booker gets crotched. Steiner busts out the “Frankensteiner” for two. He pulls out a foreign object and clocks Booker with it for the title. The fans are NOT pleased with that ending.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen worse but the middle part of this was just dreadful. Scott was at least selling here but it wasn’t anything great. This would be the beginning of the mega push that the Steiners got this summer for absolutely no apparent reason other than they were old which is how you get pushed in this company. Still though, not much although Booker would get a lot better push in about a year. Also in a little trivia for you: Scott would win the US Title in a tournament final the next year at Spring Stampede as well.

Recap of Nash vs. Goldberg, although they’re just clips with no actual talking to them.

Kevin Nash vs. Goldberg

Apparently this is the rematch from Starrcade or something. Liz and Luger are here with Nash. Nash says something on the mic but the mic doesn’t seem to work because I didn’t hear a thing. He drives Goldberg to the corner and pounds away knees in the corner. The fans are looking at something to the right of the ring and Nash continues to go as slowly as he can while still being considered alive.

The fans almost immediately chant for Sting as Nash gets a two count. He hits the side slam for another two as this has been completely one sided. The running hip attack to the back of Goldberg while he’s in the 619 position keeps the bald one down. Goldberg snaps off a shoulder block though and something like a hooking superkick to load up the spear. NASH JUMPS OVER GOLDBERG!!! The spear hits the referee so Luger pops Goldberg with the chair. Goldberg blocks the powerbomb with a handful of balls. Spear and Jackhammer end this.

Rating: D+. What in the world was the point of this? Goldberg hit like 5 moves and dominated so he’s back to the point where he used to be, minus the title that is. Still though, was there a point to having this be like seven minutes long? It wasn’t horrible, but I’m sitting here asking if that’s it. Also, was there a point to Luger and Liz being out there? I don’t see it if there was.

Video on the main event. Flair turned heel to win the title last month off Hogan and Page and Sting are there so there can be four guys in it. Savage is guest referee for no apparent reason.

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Sting vs. Ric Flair vs. Hulk Hogan

No Michael Buffer for the intros. No tags here and it’s one fall to a finish. This is one of the final matches under the People’s Champion era for Page. Flair is champion and comes out first for some reason. He and Sting pair off as Page fights Hogan. Those two never had a big PPV title match that I remember. Sting almost gets the Deathlock on Page inside a minute but DDP makes the rope.

Hogan and Flair fight up the ramp as Page tries a Diamond Cutter. Everyone back in now and it’s getting hard to call all of this. Sting slams Flair off the top which makes things feel right. Hogan takes the weight belt off and whips at the champ as STING ACTUALLY HITS THE STINGER SPLASH AGAINST THE RAILING!!! I’ve been watching him over twenty years and I’ve never seen him hit that.

The weight belt goes back on as it’s just Hogan vs. Flair in the ring at the moment. Hulk no sells the chops and hits the boot and leg. Sting hooked the Scorpion just before that and has to let it go to break up the pin. Flair gets in a shot at Hogan’s knee, because that’s gone so well before right? The Figure Four goes on and Sting misses his second attempt at a splash.

Hogan turns the hold over and Page has to break it up. Page knocks Flair to the floor and we get the Figure Four around the post on Hogan. The trainer runs out to check on Hogan and he has to leave. Even Bischoff comes out to check on him. So it’s a triple threat now and they’re all in the ring. Sting beats up Flair while Page just chills. Flair, after eleven years, still doesn’t get that chops don’t work on Sting. Flair Flip in the corner and he gets clotheslined to the floor.

Page works on Sting’s ribs but Flair is back in now. Discus lariat gets two. Savage is counting slow and hasn’t meant a thing yet. Stinger Splash hits Page and he slams DDP’s face into the mat. Page tombstones Sting for two as Flair breaks it up. Sting superplexes Flair for two. Page puts a sleeper on Flair who has a sleeper on Sting. Sting hits a jawbreaker on both and they’re all up at 9.

Sting gets double teamed and THAT STILL DOESN’T WORK ON HIM. He hits a double clothesline and beats them both down. Splashes for both guys but Page breaks up the Deathlock on Flair. Death Drop takes Page down but Sting can’t cover. Flair puts the Figure Four on Sting and Sting makes the ropes. Flair won’t break it so Savage drags them to the middle of the ring and drops the elbow (Sky Elbow according to Tony) to break it up. A Diamond Cutter to Flair gives Page his first world title.

Rating: C-. Not the worst match ever but I really don’t get what Savage was needed in there for other than a single move. A lot of this dragged really badly but they at least did something. It may not have been interesting but they were doing something. Page turned heel soon after this and it bombed HORRIBLY because people had gotten behind him for being the scrappy underdog that kept pushing until he reached the top. As in like Hardy whose heel turn also bombed. Funny how that works isn’t it?

Overall Rating: C+. WOW this was so much better than the previous two shows. I mean man this was a breath of fresh air and a lot of that is because they had some relatively clean endings. You couple that with longer matches and only one match that had no business being on PPV (arguably) and you get a decent show. It’s nothing great but it’s certainly better than the two that follow this one.

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Slamboree 1999
Date: May 9, 1999
Location: TWA Dome, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 20,516
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

Another WCW PPV for you here. This one looks a little less boring than the Bash, but that’s not really saying much. The main event here is Page, the world champion, defending against Nash. We also get the first bout in the EPIC Flair vs. Piper feud, and I’m sure you’re all dying to see that. Let’s get to it.

We open with your standard video talking about a big match tonight, which here is Goldberg vs. Sting. Also Flair vs. Piper plus a few others but it’s mainly those two.

Tony is in a leather jacket for some reason. The announcers run down the card.

Tag Titles: Raven/Perry Saturn vs. Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Chris Benoit/Dean Malenko

Raven and Saturn are back together again for some reason. The Horsemen (Benoit and Malenko) are heels. Raven and Saturn are rather popular. I really like WCW’s style in these matches as three are three men in the ring at once. Oh and Rey/Kidman are the champions. Kidman, Dean and Saturn start us off. Saturn is in a skirt due to a long story with Jericho.

Malenko gets beaten down and Saturn beats up Benoit who I guess got a tag. Saturn throws Kidman over the top in a release belly to belly. That landing looked SICK. You can’t tag someone from another team in this match. BIG Horsemen Suck chant. Raven covers Benoit and avoids a slingshot leg from Rey. Benoit and Kidman drape Raven over the top and then Benoit smashes Billy.

This is a very fast paced match so it’s hard to keep up with everything. A top rope splash by Kidman misses Benoit as Raven is on the floor. He manages to break up the Crossface though and double teams Benoit with Saturn. Frog splash to Benoit gets two. In a move that literally made my jaw drop, Dean launches Rey over his shoulder and Rey LANDS ON THE BUCKLE ON HIS FEET and hits a moonsault press for two. THAT WAS AWESOME.

Saturn dives on everyone not named Benoit and Raven. Benoit hits the Swan Dive to Raven for two but Saturn saves. The Horsemen double team Rey and now they beat up Saturn. The tagging aspect has been dropped for the time being. And of course just as I say that it’s officially Benoit vs. Kidman vs. Saturn. Kidman fights back and the fans cheer. BIG superkick from Saturn takes him down though. The crowd is really into this.

Benoit hits a springboard forearm over the top (think Jericho and his dropkick to the apron) to take out Saturn. The two of them are in the ring and a northern lights suplex gets two for the Canadian. Here are the Rolling Germans but Kidman makes the save. Dean gets a tag and gets rolled up by Saturn in a reversal to the Cloverleaf. Saturn is knocked to the floor and things slow down a bit.

Dean is like screw slow and KILLS Kidman with a powerbomb for two. Dragon Suplex to Kidman gets a delayed two. Dean tries to throw Billy into the air but Kidman hits a dropkick in mid air to break it up. Russian legsweep takes Benoit down and there’s the tag to Raven for a big reaction. He hits what we would call Three Amigos to Benoit for two. Back to Saturn who is a bit spent.

Rey vs. Saturn vs. Benoit at this point. Saturn saves a pin on Rey as Malenko and Kidman come in. Saturn and Benoit are down and Kidman isn’t sure who to jump on. Dean tries another powerbomb on him but Kidman rolls into a sunset flip. Everything breaks down and the champs hit a SWEET alley-oop rana to Benoit in the corner. They try it on Saturn but he hits a top rope sitout powerbomb to Rey for two. Arn comes in and hits a spinebuster on Saturn to HUGE heel heat. Someone in a Sting mask breaks up the Shooting Star by crotching Kidman. An elevated Even Flow gives Raven/Saturn the belts. Kanyon was in the mask.

Rating: B. This is better than probably any other match I’ve seen in all of WCW so far in 1999. They were all over the place in here and beating the living tar out of each other, which is the best thing you can ask for. Also the popular team wins off a big ending with the DDT. Very good match, but now things are going to fall through the floor, which is WCW in a nutshell.

Video on DDP.

Konnan vs. Stevie Ray

Horace and Vincent of the NWO Black and White are with Ray. The fans here in St. Louis are awesome as they’ll cheer for any face and boo any heel. Why is that so complex? Ray pounds him down in the corner but Konnan pounds him on the middle rope while making oral sex gestures. Vincent gets on the apron to break up a pin attempt. He cheats a bit more on the floor and the fans aren’t all that thrilled here.

Off to a chinlock as Ray thinks of something new he can do other than kicks and forearms. He chokes away which is at least new. Back to the chinlock for more time in the think tank. Suplex gets two and there’s the jump off the ropes into a boot spot. Konnan speeds things up and messes up a leapfrog. X Factor puts Ray down but Horace trips K-Dawg up. Here’s Rey to distract the goons and Konnan wins with a rollup (with a pretty fast count).

Rating: D-. Really dull match here but at least it was kind of logical: once Rey is there to counteract Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber, Konnan can get the pin on his own. Stevie is just so freaking boring without Booker there to help him out that there’s no need to have him out here, especially on a PPV. Boring match and not any good at all.

Video on Kevin Nash.

Video on Sting.

Page talks to Bigelow in the back but we can’t hear what’s being said.

Brian Knobbs vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

This is for the moniker King of Hardcore, which isn’t an official title. This of course is a hardcore match if you didn’t get the idea there. There isn’t going to be much to talk about in this. It’s your standard hardcore match with both guys being hit in the head with generic pieces of metal. There’s an RVD sign in the crowd. Heenan tells the announcers to be quiet so he can hear the weapon shots.

Bigelow hits a top rope headbutt for two. Out to the floor and there’s still nothing to talk about. It’s pretty much the same as every hardcore match you’ll ever see. Knobbs’ trashcan shot is blocked by a waiter’s tray which winds up going on top of Brian’s head. Bigelow is in control here. The fans want a table. There are long stretches here where there’s nothing to talk about. It’s just random weapon shots and the announcers laughing.

They fight up the aisle with Knobbs using a trashcan to keep control. There’s the internet location getting its required cameo. They go old school here with the fake souvenir stand that no fan would be able to get to because it’s on the arena floor. We go behind a curtain (revealing about 1/5 of the arena being tarped off) and there’s a ladder shot. An elbow off the stands onto a table misses for Knobbs (I think, you can’t see anything) and Bigelow suplexes him through the table for the pin.

Rating: F. Heenan’s final line of “and they do this for a living” sums things up well. Why in the world did Knobbs of all people have a job here? The match sucked due to there being nothing interesting here at all. There was no comedy spot, there was nothing other than the most basic weapons available, and nothing interesting happened at all. Bad match and really boring. Also it ran almost 12 minutes. Inexcusable.

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Booker. Booker won a match against Steiner with help from Stevie, who is in the NWO (Booker never was). Ray saved him again but Rick came in to beat him up. Rick vs. Booker started up again so let’s have a TV Title match again.

TV Title: Rick Steiner vs. Booker T

Booker is champion here if I didn’t make that clear. Rick starts out with a belly to belly release and a couple of Steiner Lines. I think he’s the heel here but I’m not sure. More control by Steiner until Booker kicks him in the face to put him down. Steiner pops up of course because he isn’t going to sell anything. Off to a chinlock by Booker. I think he’s either heel here or borderline heel.

Steiner takes over on the floor and things slow way down. Time for a chinlock again. The crowd is very quiet. Steiner punches a lot and the fans don’t care. A bunch of punches gets two and here’s that chinlock again. Booker fights back and hits the axe kick, a spinebuster and the missile dropkick but STEINER WON’T SELL THEM. Here’s what happens after every move: Steiner lays there about 2-4 seconds then gets up like nothing happened. Scott finally runs out for the distraction and a Steiner Line gets two. Scott trips Booker and the Bulldog off the ropes gives Rick the title.

Rating: D. Just a horribly boring match here as Rick is beyond worthless in the ring at this point. Naturally the answer to that is to give him a title for four months. He wouldn’t sell ANYTHING Booker did here and Booker looks like a joke as a result. Bad match but as usual, most of it is due to Rick being lazy and not selling anything.

Time to recap the stupid match of the show. Randy Savage is out of wrestling at this point so he’s putting one of his chicks (the hot one) in there against Lil Naitch in the form of referee Charles Robinson. Yes this match is happening.

Rick rambles to Buff in the back and wishes him luck against Scott later. Gee, that must be totally genuine right?

Gorgeous George vs. Charles Robinson

Ok to be fair, Robinson’s Flair costume is AWESOME. He has the robe, he has the hair, he looks exactly like a small Nature Boy. Even his face looks like him. Flair and Savage are seconds here. Asya and the other chicks are here too. To be fair, George was indeed hot. Flair, the President of WCW at the time, says he’d like to have Madusa ride Space Mountain. Miss Maddness can come too, but George is being saved for Robinson. Robinson rips George a bit and he sounds EXACTLY like Flair. This is the best imitation I’ve seen in years. Savage (POP) says George will win.

Robinson struts a lot as they stall for a few minutes. George goes after the arm and Robinson reverses. Off to a full nelson and snapmare as George is dominant. Flair and Robinson get rammed together so Savage has to come in and protect George. Robinson goes for a chair but Miss Madness steals it. She gets slammed outside and Savage FREAKS. I mean freaks by his standards.

Back in Robinson takes over with a choke and then does more of that. George comes back with a few chops and Robinson does the flip in the corner and runs the apron, only to get slammed off the top. Heenan says this is great and I can’t say I disagree. There’s a Flair Flop and they’re getting tired. The heels cheat a bit and work over George’s knee but Madusa makes the save.

Robinson works on the knee and if the match continues like it has, that means we’re heading for the Figure Four. He hooks the knee a bit and cranks on it for awhile. Here’s the Figure Four and while it looks good, it’s on the wrong knee. She reverses it and Flair comes in for the save. Savage chases him off and beats up Robinson so George can drop a half decent looking middle rope elbow for the pin. Savage is reinstated.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but at the end of the day we have a referee and a manager in there. Robinson’s Flair impression is absolutely excellent and one of the best I’ve ever seen. George really is gorgeous and it’s a shame she wasn’t around in wrestling more than she was. That being said, this was decent enough all things considered. Ten and a half minutes was too long, but it wasn’t boring and they were trying which is more important than anything else.

We recap Scott Steiner vs. Buff Bagwell. Bagwell was a face and made fun of him so Steiner said he had a big ego. Bagwell imitated him and it wasn’t really funny.

US Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Since Bagwell never won a singles title, I think you know who is champion coming in. Buff jumps him before the bell and Steiner still has the belt on. Swinging neckbreaker gets two. Scott hits him low and there’s the Push-Up elbow. Buff gets thrown to the floor and Steiner yells at some fans. Things slow WAY down with Steiner on offense. It was a running theme with the Steiners at this point.

Scott chokes away and yells at another fan. Much like in the Rick match, you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. They go to the mat and Steiner elbows him a lot. He runs to the floor and brings in a chair. If that shot had hit Steiner would have been facing 10-15 years. Bagwell fights back but there goes the referee. Buff gets the chair and here’s Rick to turn heel on Buff and whack him with the chair. The Recliner keeps the title on Scott.

Rating: D-. I can’t take many more of these bad matches. I mean the people in them are just SO lazy with them laying around and doing nothing of note. Scott and Rick are back together as the Steiners and both have singles titles. You know, because that’s what the people wanted to see and would light the world on fire. Benoit and Jericho and Malenko? Who are they?

Video on Goldberg. These videos are just their music playing over clips of them. They only last about 15-20 seconds each.

Now to really crank it up, here’s a video on all four people in the main events. There aren’t any words to this so the feuds still aren’t explained.

The third straight video (at least they’re short) is on Flair being president and being insane. He’s signing contracts without reading them and one of them is for a match with Piper for the Presidency. Flair thinks he’s President of the United States. I kid you not, this was the second biggest wrestling company in the world at this point. Oh and he went to a mental hospital and thought he was in a hotel. Again, this is what we mean when we say insulting to our intelligence.

Roddy Piper vs. Ric Flair

The winner is the president. Before things get going, referee Johnny Boone is fired and Charles Robinson replaces him. Flair runs his mouth and gets slapped to get us going. Piper knocks him to the floor and let’s take a break after that. He boxes Flair, seemingly hitting him in the chest and neck, but Flair falls anyway. He hits a low blow to take over and Robinson yells at Piper for choking.

Flair yells at Anderson to beat on Piper when he throws him outside. Flair throws Piper outside and Anderson beats on him. Asya comes in for a low blow and this is about as far from serious as you could want it to be. Flair chops away in the corner and Piper chops back. Robinson cheats on a cover and says Flair keeps getting his shoulder up. There’s the Flair Flip in the corner and they go to the outside.

Piper rams Flair’s head into Flair’s arm but we’ll say it was the post anyway. Back in the ring they ram heads and both guys are down. After about 2 seconds of leg softening here’s the Figure Four. Piper tries a sunset flip and there go the trunks. He hooks Flair in the Figure Four and Flair screams that he gives up but Robinson ignores it. Anderson breaks it up but gets thrown in a sleeper. Now Flair in the sleeper. Asya runs in and gets kissed and put in a sleeper as well. The referee gets decked and Flair hits Piper with an illegal object for the pin.

Rating: The chipmunk has pneumonia. I better take him to the embassy before he deletes the remote control of reality and I run out of apple juice. If he does that, there will be a great and mighty feast in the great archway of the flippyflook.

And that was more logical than putting this match on PPV. But wait: there’s more.

Here’s Eric Bischoff who hasn’t been seen in awhile and has no authority whatsoever in this company. He says Piper is the winner and that Flair can bite him. Somehow this stands. Eric and Piper hug to a face pop (intentional I’d assume but who knows with this company?) and Piper fires Flair. Just….yeah.

Recap of Sting vs. Goldberg. This is for who the franchise is or something.

Sting vs. Goldberg

Tony is either trying to explain what we just saw or is questioning it himself. I’m really not sure. I’m also not sure why this match is happening but who cares? Sting has white boots with black toes. It makes as much sense as anything else here. Goldberg takes him down and snaps off a powerslam for no cover. Sting stalls on the floor and then takes Goldberg to the floor with a clothesline.

Goldberg hooks a cross armbreaker but it isn’t on correctly. Sting fights out of it and we go to a test of strength. He takes out Goldberg’s braced knee (oh sweet psychology, how I missed you) and puts on a Boston Crab which is quickly broken. Goldberg fights back with power moves and things slow WAY down. Top rope clothesline by Sting sets up some Stinger Splashes but Goldberg catches him in a spinebuster which is called a spear. And here’s Bret Hart with a chair and it’s a no contest.

Rating: D. Another bad match. I mean seriously, this show SUCKS. There’s been nothing but boring matches (aside from the opener) and stuff that is basically around to set up matches on Nitro rather than HERE ON THE FREAKING PPV. Nothing to see here as they basically kept it as slow gear as possible.

And then the Steiners run out and beat up Goldberg and Sting. WHY ARE THEY THE FOCAL POINT OF A SHOW IN 1999????

Another wordless video on Page vs. Nash. No word on why they’re fighting but there’s clearly no thinking anywhere else in this show so who cares?

WCW World Title: Diamond Dallas Page vs. Kevin Nash

And Buffer’s mic doesn’t work right. Seriously, fold already. You can hear him in the arena but not over the PPV feed. Page is champion. Early Cutter attempt is blocked and Page hits the floor. We actually get a reference to the Vegas Connection. Page hammers away but runs his mouth to get himself sent to the floor. Back inside and Nash hammers away. Page charges at Nash and finally kicks him low to take over.

Page rips a buckle off and hits him with the mic for two. He gets sent into the exposed steel though and both guys are down. Page takes over and sends him to the floor. A baseball slide puts Nash down and there’s a Diamond Cutter to kill Nash out there. It only gets two in the ring but at least there was a delay. Now Page goes for the knee for no apparent reason.

He wraps it around the post a few times and pounds on Nash again. There’s something going on in the crowd so they change the camera angle, which is pretty smart. Nash makes his comeback and hits Snake Eyes onto the buckle. Back to the regular angle. Nash….at least limp. Big boot and Jackknife….but here’s Savage to break it up for the LAME DQ. So is he a heel now too?

I would rate it here, but Eric comes out AGAIN and restarts the match. Russian legsweep gets two for the champ. Discus lariat gets the same. And here’s a sleeper, which looks awful because Nash is so tall. Now Nash hooks an even WORSE sleeper but Page jawbreaks his way out of it for two. A chair shot hits the rope and Page takes it in the face for two. Low blow gets two for Page. And then Nash kicks the chair into Page’s face, takes the straps down and wins the title via the Jackknife.

Rating: D. The fans popped for the ending, but I’m just spent at this point. There’s nothing interesting here and the run in and restart made no sense, which is what the name of the show should be. Nash would hold the title for a few months before dropping it to Savage before Hogan took it the next night. This was nothing interesting at all and the knee selling coming and going hurt things.

Overall Rating: F-. This is usually were I’d make some witty statement about how this show was so bad it goes beyond bad ratings or something, but there’s nothing left in me after watching this mess. The illogical stories, the stupid booking, the overdoing it with the Steiners, the worthless world title change, and the bad matches just made me completely uninterested by the end of this show. I haven’t felt like that about a PPV in a very long time, but this just drained me completely.

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Great American Bash 1999
Date: June 13, 1999
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Attendance: 11,672
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay

This isn’t intentionally after the other GAB reviews I was doing. It just turned out that way. This is one of the last shows under Nash’s time with the book and therefore, it’s technically ok but it’s not interesting at all for the most part. The main event is Nash vs. Savage for Nash’s title. Other than that it’s your run of the mill show of the last year WCW had any prayer of ever making a comeback to at least respectable. Let’s get to it.

Master P. and his group of guys, the No Limit Soldiers, arrive. Curt Hennig pops up and praises him, saying P is the king of rap. He asks for an autograph and P says sure, signing a CD for him. Hennig destroys it and the rap vs. country feud is on. You know, for a southern based company. Yeah, let’s make a rap group faces here and pay P over 200 grand per appearance, yes I said PER APPEARANCE, and expect him to be popular.

The opening video is about Nash vs. Savage, who have been terrorizing each other while Savage wears a big pink fur coat. Savage: “You’re a stupid person.” A lot of mud was slung, and I mean that literally. This was the thick of the Hummer Driver angle, where someone was driving a big white Hummer and trying to run people over with it. The driver was never officially revealed, but it was heavily implied to be one of about 5 people. You know, I spent a long time trying to figure out why WCW died, and the best answer I can give you is to watch the show and you’ll get it yourself.

The announcers actually recap the Hennig vs. Master P showdown. IT WAS THREE MINUTES AGO!!! They talk about Nash vs. Savage a bit.

Here’s a video on….well on almost every match on the card. Is there a reason they’re filling in time like this?

Now here’s a video just on Knobbs vs. Hak (Sandman) which is the opener. Knobbs has joined the First Family, which is Jimmy Hart’s lower card stable.

Brian Knobbs vs. Hardcore Hak

WCW tried a Hardcore Division but this is a kendo stick match, whatever that means. Is that…..is that……is that a cover of My Sharona that Knobbs is coming out to? Why in the world is he coming out to a cover of My Sharona? Brian says it’s Mrs. Nasty’s birthday today. I wonder if he’s going to take her to the Baltimore Science Museum and do science experiments with her. He wants this to be just a hardcore match. Hak comes out to what used to be Mongo’s music. He walks around the ring for awhile and wastes even more time.

Knobbs wants a hardcore match and the way to do that is to throw the weapons out. The opening bell is at 12:42 into the show. Knobbs hits Hak with a trashcan and then hits him with the lid of it. At least he’s complete with his assault. There’s a Pit Stop and Hak gets hit in the head again. He gets his feet up to kick a chair back into Knobbs’ face and momentum shifts. I would say the pendulum has swung but I’m not bringing Gorilla into this.

Here comes a ladder and it gets thrown at Knobbs from the floor. A slingshot legdrop hits the ladder but Knobbs sells it anyway. The leg gets put around Knobbs’ leg and hit with a chair. Knobbs sends him into the ladder. There isn’t going to be much more than this people. Then again, that’s all there needs to be here. Knobbs beats him down again and the fans chant for Hak.

Hak makes a comeback and tries a Swanton onto the ladder but Knobbs moves. Tony suggests a table and the fans want one as well. We don’t get one though as Hak throws him into a chair, which isn’t something you see every day. That and a shot from a kendo stick is enough for the pin.

Rating: D. Yes it was bad, but the whole point of this was to get the crowd into things and these matches usually did that. Besides, it’s not like either of these guys are good for anything else but Knobbs is a Hoganite so they have to have something for him right? Nothing match but it was fine for what it was.

Hugh Morrus and Knobbs destroy Hak post match.

Buff Bagwell thanks Piper for giving him a big match (it’s against Disco Inferno) and says he’ll have Piper’s back in the match with Flair tonight for the presidency.

Van Hammer vs. Mikey Whipwreck

So Whipwreck was a crowd favorite in ECW so he came to WCW and did nothing. This resulted in him being mentioned in a booking meeting and Kevin Nash, the booker, not knowing who he was. Hammer was in the middle of a moderate push so he’ll be killing Mikey here. The announcers talk about who’s driving the Hummer to kill time because this match is going to be very boring.

Hammer beats on Mikey whose speed moves aren’t working at all. He tries a monkey flip but Hammer grabs him by the head and slams him off the top. The fans chant boring and I can’t exactly disagree. A delayed vertical suplex gets NO pop. You can tell that a match is dull when a move which is an incredible power display like that just quiets the crowd.

Time for an abdominal stretch. This was the only match not advertised in the opening montage. If that surprises you, it shouldn’t. Out to the floor and Mikey gets dropped onto the barricade. A dive to the floor keeps Mikey down. Back in Whipwreck comes off the top for two. And then he jumps into a release spinebuster and a cobra clutch slam for the pin.

Rating: D-. Why in the world was this on PPV? Van Hammer got a push around this time but it went nowhere because Rick Steiner destroyed him at Bash at the Beach. Whipwreck would be back in ECW later in the year along with Sandman, which they probably never should have left in the first place. However, how can you turn down the huge money?

Buff Bagwell vs. Disco Inferno

….why? What did I ever do to WCW? I watched Nitro through 2000. Why are they doing this to me? Disco starts off with a neckbreaker so Bagwell hits the floor. Basic stuff to start here as Disco dances after every move he hits. Disco is the evil one here. Buff loads up the Blockbuster but Disco hits the floor. This is a rematch from Nitro which Bagwell won. Then why is it happening again?

They stall even more and work on the arm until Disco speeds things up and hits a clothesline to take over. Surprising amount of offense here from him. Disco goes up top and dances before hitting a middle rope elbow for two. He tries it again but Buff moves and takes over. Bagwell loads up the Blockbuster but Disco knocks him to the floor. Stunner (Last Dance, Disco’s finisher) hits on the floor but he doesn’t throw Buff back in. The Macarena Piledriver (exactly what it sounds like) is countered and Buff hammers him down. Blockbuster ends this clean.

Rating: D. Technically this was fine, but why in the world was this on PPV? It has to do with Piper giving the young guys a chance, but it’s not like that means anything for reasons you’ll see later on. Also, Bagwell is FAR better as a face than as a heel. He has some solid natural charisma, but they turned him heel so many times that it stopped meaning anything at all.

Recap of the Rednecks vs. the Rap Guys. It’s your standard culture clash feud and since it’s WCW, they missed the point of being a southern company and country being popular because they’re not that smart.

DJ Ran, a DJ who would shout and ask where the loudest section of the arena was, shouts and asks where the loudest section of the arena is. He brings out Master P and his No Limit Soldiers.

Konnan/Rey Mysterio vs. Curt Hennig/Bobby Duncum Jr.

Here’s another brilliant WCW moment for you: the Rednecks (officially named the West Texas Rednecks) had a song they performed themselves called Rap Is Crap. Being a southern company, it actually got on a few radio stations in Dixie and was requested a few times. Cool, free publicity right?

Now a smart company would release it as a single, maybe make a few dollars and possibly turn the Rednecks face right? Well since it’s WCW, they sent the radio stations cease and desist letters for using their material without permission. Vince may be crazy and not get it a lot of the time, but you know he’s know how to capitalize on something like that.

Anyway, Rey is Cruiserweight Champion and he and Konnan come out in gas masks. Konnan and Rey clear the ring quickly and Master P slaps Hennig in the back of the head. Konnan and Duncum start us off and it’s off to Rey quickly. He speeds things up but jumps into a backbreaker. Powerbomb brings in Hennig. Rey gets beaten down and I think we’re already into the middle of the match.

Konnan tries to come in but it allows for double teaming on the outside. Rey goes into the barricade and is in trouble. We keep looking at Master P to try desperately to validate paying him. SWEET standing dropkick takes Rey down. After a long beating, Konnan comes in but the referee missed the tag. The beating continues and Rey tries an Asai moonsault which doesn’t work.

Rey finally takes the leg out and there’s the tag to Konnan. Things break down and Hennig messes something up in the corner. I think it was miscommunication or something but it wasn’t all that bad. Bronco Buster hits him (called the Rough Rider here) and Konnan is down on the floor. Barry Windham runs out but one of the No Limit Soldiers runs in and hits Duncum for the pin for Rey.

Rating: C-. Again technically fine, but it would set up more of this feud later. Again though, they had no idea what the face/heel dynamic was supposed to be here and it didn’t really work at all. The match itself was ok, but I’m still not sure why this was on PPV. I’ve watched a little over an hour of this show and nothing at all has jumped out as being anything beyond a Nitro match.

Big pullapart brawl follows and security (one of them being future Natural Born Thriller Reno) breaks it up. Rey gets hogtied in the ring.

Ernest Miller vs. Scott Norton

This isn’t even good enough for Nitro. Apparently it is as this is the fourth or fifth match in a feud. Norton won a bunch to start and then Miller hit him with a crowbar to get the win. And never mind as for some reason, Horace Freaking Hogan comes out and says that since Cat (Miller) hit him on Monday also, Horace, who is in the NWO, gets the shot.

Ernest Miller vs. Horace Hogan

Yes, this match is actually happening. Horace is Hogan’s nephew and a decent looking power guy. He takes over to start but Miller gets in a kick to the face to take over. Now he stands around. Horace gets sent to the floor and Sonny Onoo kicks him a few times. The crowd is DEAD. Horace takes him down with a big boot and a splash gets two. Miller gets dumped to the floor where Onoo loads up the red shoe out of a briefcase. A superkick with it ends this.

Rating: F. Horace Hogan was on a PPV. I don’t think I need to explain why this is a failure.

We’re an hour and twenty minutes into this show and the best match has been the tag match which wasn’t even good enough to be a midcard match on a house show.

We recap Flair vs. Piper which is for the Presidency of the Company. Flair ran the company but the power went to his head so somehow Piper got a match for control of the company. They had this match last month and in some big mess, Piper got control. Even the Horsemen turned on Flair during this.

Ric Flair vs. Roddy Piper

Flair has Anderson and Asya with him. She’s a big bodybuilder and freakish looking and spells her name with a Y instead of an A. Get the joke? They trade chops in the corner and Flair is in trouble early. Piper pounds him down in the corner using his old man punches. Flair Flop and here are more chops. Randy Anderson (referee) blocks a punch and Flair still can’t take over.

Flair bails to the floor and this is going nowhere. Piper punches him down again but a low blow stops him. Arn cheats on the floor and there’s another low blow. Flair’s trunks get pulled down which Tony calls memorable. I call it old hat. Flair gets slammed off the top and Arn gets decked on the floor. A pretty bad looking sunset flip gets two. Off to a sleeper but Flair shoves him off. He pulls out a foreign object and down goes Piper. It gets two and here’s the Figure Four with Arn helping. Cue Bagwell for the save and Flair wins by DQ to become president again.

Rating: D-. Awful match as you would expect from two guys who are combined about 9,000 years old. No idea why they thought these two were the right idea instead of, I don’t know, having Bagwell and someone else as a surrogate for both guys to put the focus on them. That would make sense though and might get someone new up the card and we can’t have that.

Bagwell beats up Flair until Piper turns on him and sides with Flair and Anderson. Piper would become Vice President out of all this.

DJ Ran yells some more. Seriously, why does this guy exist?

We recap Rick Steiner vs. Sting. Tank Abbott is involved in this somehow. They had a cage match and Sting got beaten down by both guys.

Rick Steiner vs. Sting

Steiner is TV Champion and I have no idea if this is for the title or not. Nope it’s non-title. Also it’s No DQ and Falls Count Anywhere. This is new apparently. The interesting thing to do in Steiner matches here are to see how long he’ll actually sell a move for. If it’s over two seconds, he’s feeling generous. Steiner pounds him down but Sting comes back with a dropkick as they go to the floor.

Steiner hammers him some more, this time with a chair. They throw drinks at each other and Sting misses the Splash against the railing as is his custom. Piledriver on the floor gets two. Release German gets two back in the ring. Sting fights back and hits a Vader Bomb. The crowd is DEAD. Big top rope splash gets almost no reaction for two. And since Steiner has done enough, here’s a rest hold. Sting escapes and hits the Splash in the corner. There’s another and Sting hooks the Deathlock but Steiner goes to the ropes.

They head to the floor and it’s all about to fall apart. They fight up to the web location and into the back. The booing commences and Tank Abbott pops up with a towel to choke Sting. And here’s Scott Steiner RELEASING DOEBERMANS AND A ROTTEWEILER ON STING. The camera goes all weird like it’s in a bad horror movie. The dogs jump Sting and this is clearly edited because Scott Steiner is in a different place than he was about two seconds earlier.

Rating: Agoobwa. Yeah, I had to bust that out again. We just saw badly edited footage of dogs attacking Sting. My goodness. This company DESERVED to die. By the way, if you’ve ever been curious as to what I mean when I say something insults my intelligence as a wrestling fan, this is a fine example.

The Steiners come out and demand the referee declare Rick the winner. Whatever man. Oh and they’re both NWO. Great.

We recap the tag title situation. Bigelow/Page beat up Saturn/Raven, the tag champions. Kanyon had to replace Raven but got beaten down also. Page and Bigelow won the belts with ease. Flair, crooked and insane, offered to hook up with Benoit to win the titles. Flair walked out on him and Saturn came out to replace him and they won the titles in a rematch on Thursday. Kanyon joined Page/Bigelow and tonight the Triad gets their rematch.

That’s such backwards booking it makes my head hurt. I’m going to spoil this for you: the Triad gets the titles back here. This takes away the surprise of the match tonight. Now it’s 3-2 against the champions so they’re already against big odds. Instead of having Kanyon join them here where they win the titles, we blow the surprise early and make things less surprising an entertaining as a result. Nice job WCW.

Tag Titles: Chris Benoit/Perry Saturn vs. Diamond Dallas Page/Kanyon

Perry and Chris come out to Malenko’s music for some reason. We’re told Sting is fine from the BIG DOG ATTACK. Benoit vs. Kanyon gets us going. Chris clears the ring and the partners both get tags. The champs clear the ring again but go after Bigelow to let Team Jersey take over. The champs hit almost stereo belly to belly overheads to get control back and it’s officially Page vs. Benoit now.

Page beats him down and it’s off to Kanyon who goes to the middle rope, puts his leg on Benoit’s head, and drives him down with a Fameasser for two. Back to Page and Benoit gets a single suplex for two. Page tries the Helicopter Bomb but it’s more like a regular one instead. A Kanyon moonsault misses and here’s Saturn. He cleans house and hits a frog splash on Kanyon for two.

Saturn gets beaten down again by some good old fashioned double teaming. He tries a sunset flip but Kanyon makes a blind tag and grabs the head of Saturn, exposing Saturn’s back. Page comes in and decks him to take over. Kanyon was freaking smart in the ring man. The beating continues for awhile but Page misses a dive and crotches himself on the top buckle.

That allows for a double tag to bring in Kanyon and Benoit with the crazy Canadian going cracy on the challengers. Kanyon REALLY loudly calls for a suplex where he lands behind Benoit and he does just that. He gets rammed into Bigelow though and Rolling Germans get two. A dragon suplex gets a VERY close two. Benoit hits the Swan Dive as Saturn kind of falls off the top into a Diamond Cutter. Cue Malenko who pulls Saturn out for some reason. Crossface to Kanyon but here’s Bigelow to help with an elevated Cutter and the Triad wins the titles.

Rating: C+. Not bad here but the rematch where the Triad could trade in and out next month at the Bash at the Beach was a much better match. Still though, this was so far and away a better match than anything else all night that I’d rather watch it a dozen times than anything else here. Not bad, but they’ve had better matches.

We recap Nash vs. Savage. Savage snapped and painted Nash’s face with lipstick and makeup. Then there was the Hummer Driver ordeal and a bunch of mud. The Hummer Driver is here with Savage tonight.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Randy Savage

Savage has three blondes with him: real life girlfriend Gorgeous George, Madusa and Miss Madness (Molly Holly). The big elbow has been unbanned. Well that’s good to know. Nash’s ribs are messed up. The champ (Nash) hammers him down and hooks the side slam but can’t follow up. Savage goes after the ribs and things slow WAY down. Savage was just a name at this point and wasn’t anywhere near his usual self in the ring.

If you weren’t paying attention, this is very dull stuff. It’s just Savage hitting him in the ribs to soften them up for an elbow attempt later. The girls keep cheating, including a missile dropkick from Molly. The elbow hits but it only gets two, mainly because we’re like 3 minutes into the match. Nash comes back with Snake Eyes and the big boot. Jackknife hits and the girls run in but it isn’t a DQ somehow. Then SID FREAKING VICIOUS returns from not being seen in mainstream wrestling in almost two years (he was in ECW for like 2 sips of coffee but I wouldn’t call that mainstream) to beat up Nash for the DQ.

Rating: F. If this was the main event of a show, I’d ask for my money back even if I didn’t pay a dime to get in, which was a common occurrence for a lot of the fans at this time. The Sid run-in was a legit shocker, but getting to that point was just dreadful. I have no idea who thought this was a good idea, but what do I know?

Overall Rating: -F. As in we’ve gone so low that we’ve went past Z into negative letters. This was HORRIBLE and easily one of the worst PPVs I’ve ever seen. Not only did the main event suck, the best match is just ok and ran longer than it needed to. Plus, the dogs man. That ranks right up there with the dumbest things I’ve ever seen in wrestling. Combining that with guys like Van Hammer and Brian Knobbs being on PPV and how in the world could this be anything but horrible?a

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Clash of the Champions 11: Coastal Crush
Date: June 13, 1990
Location: McAlister Field House, Charleston, South, Carolina
Attendance: 4,100
Commentators: Jim Ross, Bob Caudle

This is right before the Great American Bash which is where Sting grabbed thr brass ring and got his first world title. The main event is Junkyard Dog vs. Flair and I have no idea why. Anyway, this is mainly a nothing show, but we also get some Steiners vs. Doom awesomeness so I can’t complain there. Let’s get to it.

The Southern Boys say they’re ready for the Freebirds.

The Birds respond by singing their own theme music.

Southern Boys vs. Freebirds

This is the Southern Boys’ (Steve Armstrong and Tracy Smothers) national debut. The Birds jump them which doesn’t work out all that well for them. Smothers and Garvin officially start us off. Smothers gets beaten down in the corner but breaks through and draws the Birds in for Steve to hit a top rope cross body to take them both out. Things settle down a bit and Garvin takes over on Armstrong.

Back to Hayes who works over the arm. This is a pretty basic match so far but nothing has been all that bad. Elbow gets two for Hayes and it’s back to the arm. The arena they’re in is on the campus on the Citadel whose coach won some award the day of this show so it’s nice timing. In other words, there’s not much to talk about here so I’m repeating what JR says. Armstrong finally breaks through to make a tag to Smothers and he cleans house. Everything breaks down and Garvin covers Smothers but Steve comes off the top with a flying headbutt and puts Tracy on top for the big upset.

Rating: C+. Great example here of what you do to start a show. They had a fast paced match with a hot ending and that’s all you need to do to start a show. I enjoyed it, even though there wasn’t much to it. That being said, at times that’s all you need to do and it was a very fine opener.

Tommy Rich vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Bigelow looks strange sleeveless. Rich hammers away to start but runs into the size and power game. Tommy, who used to be world champion while Bigelow never war, works on the arm and gets a rollup for one. Bam Bam just goes off, tossing Rich all over the place and then choking past five for the DQ. Bigelow wasn’t in WCW long if I remember right.

Rating: D-. This was pretty much nothing but a way for Bigelow to look dominant. I don’t remember him in 1990 at all and I know he wasn’t on most of the PPVs later in the year at all. I’ve checked and this and Capital Combat were the only two major shows he was on all year. It was an NWA/Japan thing so he went to Japan for good for a few years until he went back to the WWF in late 92.

A man is coming. His name is Vader. He’ll debut at the Bash.

This guy will be as well: El Gigante. He has an interview with Gary Michael Capetta of all people. It’s in Spanish because Gigante can’t speak much English. I speak enough Spanish to understand it but thankfully they translate it.

Samoan Swat Team vs. Mike Rotunda/Z-Man

Rotunda is Captain Mike here which is post Varsity Club for him. The Swat Team is Fatu and Samoan Savage, who is better known as Tama from the Islanders. Rotunda vs. Fatu gets us going and the Samoan is knocked to the floor. Off to Z-Man who dropkicks Fatu to the floor again. Back to Rotundo who gets a cross body for two. The Samoans cheat to take over. Oddly enough they don’t have a manager which is rare for the wild savages.

Rotunda gets caught and beaten down. By the way, changing the last letter of his name is intentional. You’ll hear it as either depending on what year it is. Nerve hold goes on and Bob Caudle says it’s like hitting a mule in the head with a 2×4. Can someone call PETA? Rotundo gets beaten down on the floor but comes back with a double clothesline to take over. Z-Man comes in and misses most of the kicks that are sold anyway. Savage hits a Vader Bomb but the faces switch (WHAT?) and Rotunda steals a small package win.

Rating: D+. I’m in awe over that ending. One: Rotunda has shorter hair. Two: He’s in black, Z-Man was in white. Three: They don’t look alike. Four: FATU LOOKED STRAIGHT AT HIM FOR THREE SECONDS. The match was ok other than that though, and it was fine for the spot it had on here which was just a five and a half minute filler.

Video on Mean Mark.

Mean Mark vs. Brian Pillman

For those of you unfamiliar with Mark, I’ll save his reveal to the end of the match. Mark has Dangerously with him and jumps Pillman to start. He’s a big monster and that’s about the extent of his character. Oh and he’s mean. Pillman tries to use speed but Mark just kicks him down like he’s nothing. Crucifix doesn’t work at all and Mark stomps away. Off to a chinlock and Mark is so new he can’t even do that right. An elbow in the corner misses but Brian can’t get anything going. Mark knocks him to the apron but he skins the cat and hits a missile dropkick. And then they botch the ending off an Irish whip so Mark hot shots him for the pin.

Rating: D. Boring match here but it set up Mark for his US Title shot at the Bash. His finisher was the Heart Punch which is exactly what it sounds like. Mark would only appear like 5 times in the NWA before his final appearance at the Bash. He would be in the WWF in November as an unhurtable monster called Kane. That was just his first name. His occupation was an undertaker. He soon dropped the first name and just went by his job title.

US Tag Titles: Rock N Roll Express vs. Midnight Express

The Midnights have the belts. That Midnight song is just AWESOME. Eaton vs. Gibson to get us started. These two teams probably wrestled about a thousand times so they’ll have a decent match just by muscle memory. The problem here is that they’re getting old which makes that a little bit harder. They spend a few minutes working on getting to a lockup. Off to Lane who does a little better with his kicks.

Gibson kicks him in the head to knock him back down. Off to Morton and my goodness the hair gel bills in this match could bankrupt a small country. These two are called the cream of the crop by JR and I can’t say I agree. They’re moving fast here but somehow it’s still in first gear. Nothing here is anything interesting at all. Morton finally gets a rana to speed things up but the Midnights have a meeting instead of keeping things going.

Off to Eaton but Morton escapes the corner again and grabs the arm again. The Midnights can’t get anything going here. Morton tries another armdrag but Bobby punches him down to finally give the Midnights the advantage. Morton counters a superplex in mid-air but Lane breaks up a rollup. Everything breaks down and the challengers hit stereo rollups for stereo twos.

Things slow down again and Eaton hits a suplex to Morton before bringing Lane back in. Off to Eaton quickly but he misses a charge in the corner and Gibson comes in for probably the last tag of the match for his team. Morton and Eaton go to the floor as Gibson goes after the legs. Off to a sleeper instead but Bobby breaks it up which gets two for Eaton. Everything breaks down again and the double dropkick takes Eaton down. Lane breaks the cover up….and that’s a DQ. Seriously?

Rating: C. This was one of the weakest Express Collisions I’ve seen in a very long time. Granted it probably had a lot to do with them getting later into their mainstream careers. Not much to see here but the Midnights would lose the titles soon and they would be retired before too long, which was probably the right idea.

Doug Furnas vs. Barry Windham

Furnas is billed as the World’s Strongest Man. Windham is a Horseman. Furnas runs Barry down and JR is talking about football. Sunset flip gets two for Doug and Barry bails. Furnas kind of botches a backflip off the top and doesn’t quite get Barry up for a gorilla press. Clothesline gets two. Barry gets his knee up and takes Doug’s head off with a clothesline. JR can’t stop praising Furnas to get on to the match. Powerslam gets two for Furnas. They hit the ropes for a bit and Barry grabs a belly to back and puts his feet on the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. Decent power match here but nothing too great. Furnas went to Japan soon after this so he didn’t mean all that much. Windham was a Horseman for a few more years but mainly did tag team stuff. He has a really forgettable career around this time actually. Not much here but it was ok.

Sid (after being told to go by the director) says he’ll take out Luger.

Lex Luger vs. Sid Vicious

Sid jumps him to start and but Lex hits a clothesline and pins him in like 20 seconds.

World Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Doom

The Steiners had been unstoppable but Doom had shocked the world and won the titles at a PPV called Capital Combat. Doom has the old Ron Simmons’ music which is still awesome. The masks are gone too. Ron vs. Scott gets us going. Scott busts out something I’ve never seen before: a floatover fallaway slam. It isn’t really falling away either as he doesn’t let go. Both Doomers take one and the ring is cleared.

A Steiner Line to the back of the head puts Simmons down and it’s off to Reed. Scott throws him around too. I can easily see why they were thinking he was the heir apparent to the world title here. You know, except for the whole Sting guy. Rick comes in now but Nick Patrick gets in the way and Ron gets in a right hand. Rick is like cool man and hits a belly to belly to send Ron flying.

Now it’s Rick’s turn to beat up Doom on his own. Reed FINALLY goes to the eyes to take over. They go back to the Doom corner and Rick fights back out of it with ease. On the floor Doom gets it together and takes Rick down via a clothesline. Simmons beats on Rick back inside and you can really tell that Doom isn’t that experienced yet. While Scott is with the referee Rick gets tossed to the floor. Reed comes in and drops a middle rope elbow for two.

Reed misses a running knee into the corner and Rick hits a double axe off the middle rope. Back to Scott and things speed way up again. Everything breaks down and Teddy throws in a foreign object. Scott takes Simmons down with a superplex but Reed clocks him with the object. Rick covers Simmons at the same time and it’s a double pin, but Scott was legal so Doom wins it.

Rating: C. These two could have good matches every time they went out there and this worked well enough. Doom would hold the titles longer than any team in the history of WCW, now losing them until February of the next year to the Freebirds who lost them to the Steiners before they won them from Doom. And yes that’s accurate.

JYD says he’ll win.

Paul Orndorff says he’ll beat Anderson.

Paul Orndorff vs. Arn Anderson

I don’t remember Orndorff around this time at all. He’s a face and Anderson is by definition a Horseman. Anderson is TV Champion but this is non-title. Slow start with Paul working on a headlock. Make that a sleeper. Now it’s a figure four. You know that’s going to get a pop in the south. After the leg is slammed into the post, Anderson hooks the spinebuster to break the momentum.

Orndorff gets a sunset flip and pulls the trunks down which thankfully is on a different camera side. Off to an abdominal stretch. Arn finally gets caught grabbing the ropes and we go to a chinlock instead. Orndorff comes back with punches and things speed up a bit. It’s still not all that interesting though. Anderson gets the knees up but Orndorff reverses a small package for the pin.

Rating: D. Just a dull match here but I’ve never liked Orndoff’s stuff at all. Well his stuff with Hogan was good but his WCW stuff always bored me. I think it’s more that he had one incredible feud and that was about it for him. Boring match and Orndorff never got the title I don’t think.

The Horsemen say that they’ll win the main event tonight and Flair will keep the title. This was pretty rambling though.

NWA World Title: Junkyard Dog vs. Ric Flair

JYD gets a full jazz band intro. He takes Flair down with a right hand and is trying to keep this basic, which is probably smart for someone of his intellect. There the on all fours headbutt. A punch puts Flair on the ramp and we get a Flair Flop. Back in a few chops are no sold. A punch in the corner gets the same result. Now a knee drop is no sold. Ok we get it: he has a hard head.

Now they stand around for awhile because that’s been done a few times already in this match, so let’s do it again. Dog punches him again and there’s Flair Flop #2. Ole distracts the referee so Flair hits JYD in the head with a chair. Guess how much it’s sold. The answer would be NONE. Flair jumps into a punch and this is really quite bad. Flair hits a knee to the back…and then gets slammed off the top. He pounds away and the Horsemen run in for the DQ.

Rating: F+. This was just bad. I have no idea what the point in making JYD look so strong was but it didn’t really work at all. Flair didn’t get anything more than a few chops here and there and it made him look awful. This didn’t work at all and the champ looked like a joke. He would lose the title in a few weeks, but man at least make him look strong beforehand.

Sting and his boys clear the ring and Sting stalks Flair to the back.

After a break, Rocky King yells about the Horsemen. Thankfully someone intelligent sounding (Sting) talks quickly and says he wants Flair. Their title match hadn’t been announced yet. He suggests the Bash for the shot and says he’ll beg if he has to. The Horsemen come back and it winds up being Sting vs. Flair in the ring as everyone else is held back. Sting pounds on Flair as the credits roll.

Overall Rating: C-. Not the best show ever but I’ve seen a lot worse. The problem is that the wrestling is ok, but it’s not really interesting. You had a bunch of matches on here that ran about five minutes and that really isn’t enough to get some interest going for things. This didn’t really set up the Bash. Almost all of these people were on the PPV but their matches weren’t announced here. Not much to see but it’s nothing horrible.

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Monday Nitro #23
Date: February 5, 1996
Location: Jenkins Center, Lakeland, Florida
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan, Steve McMichael

We’re FINALLY at the go home show for Superbrawl which would turn out to be an absolute disaster. Anyway this on paper looks like a decent card but I’m not completely sold yet. These Nitros are so hit or miss that it’s unreal. Anyway this should be ok and if nothing else we don’t have to hear about how awesome Superbrawl will be after this so let’s get to it.

By the way this is around the time when they started the overrun so these shows are going to get a bit longer.

Eric and company run down the card for tonight and talk about Hogan a lot. His eye injury is the main topic of discussion of course.

WCW World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Randy Savage

Yes please. Benoit is a Horseman here which is why he’s getting this show. He’s not well liked at all due to said affiliation and has zero chance of winning here but this should be fun either way. Please give them some time? Big pop for Savage as this is more or less his hometown. He has Woman and Liz here with him. Guess what would happen with them at the PPV. Just guess.

Now let’s make fun of WWF for a bit. Have to take care of that no? Benoit holds up the four fingers at Savage and the crowd doesn’t seem to care. Benoit was known as a guy with talent but he hadn’t proven a thing yet so this isn’t a real challenge. He takes over though and sends Savage to the floor. This was also normal though as Savage’s style consisted of 1. Get beaten up. 2. Get beaten up a lot more. 3. Elbow. 4. Win. That was how most Savage matches went for a few years including here. Well maybe not the last two but you get the point.

Savage can’t get anything going and Benoit chops away in the corner. There’s the snap suplex as Eric says that historically Superbrawl is one of the biggest PPVs in history. Swan Dive hits as this has been ALL Benoit. Benoit works on the back as apparently he isn’t trying to win so he can wear Savage down for Flair on Sunday.

Out to the floor goes Savage and Benoit tries a suicide dive to the floor but goes short and slams his head onto the foot of the railing. Sick SICK shot and totally legit it seems. Flair runs out to try to give Benoit a chance to remember what planet he’s on. Flair and Anderson beat down Savage for the DQ. Woman also turns heel and beats him up. Hogan makes the save with a chair.

Rating: B-. Given what they had here, this worked rather well. Savage is beaten down for the PPV and Woman turned heel. That spot with Benoit had to be at least partially botch as even Benoit isn’t crazy enough to do that on purpose. Pretty good TV match and always good to see Benoit get a chance to shine.

Savage is helped out so Hogan gets to talk now! The crowd is about 60/40 for Hogan here. Flair sneaks up on Hogan and hits him low. Liz can only watch. Flair goes after the bad eye as Giant comes out. BIG chair shot and Zodiac stops Giant for some reason. Savage comes back out for the save. Randy yells at Liz, asking why didn’t you warn Hogan. That’s a very good question. If you didn’t get it, Liz would turn on Savage at the PPV.

Kevin Sullivan/Hugh Morrus vs. Arn Anderson/Brian Pillman

Before the match we get a clip of their brawl the previous week. Sweet goodness I could listen to that Horsemen music for a long time. Bell rings after a break with Morrus vs. Pillman. I think this is Pillman’s last Nitro. Bischoff points out how scary it is to have Anderson be the sanest guy in the match. Pillman can’t hurt Morrus as this was when they wanted Morrus to be something special I think.

Big press slam puts Pillman down and the same goes for Anderson. We hear about the strap match on Sunday. I’ll post my review of the PPV at the end of this review. Make sure to check that out as it might be the most bizarre stories in wrestling history. Off to Morrus vs. Anderson and Anderson hits a spinebuster for no cover.

Pillman comes in, slaps Morrus and then tags in Anderson. I liked his insane bits back in the day like this. Anderson with a chinlock now as we haven’t had Sullivan in here for the majority of the match. Back off to Pillman and then right back to Anderson. Other than the opening I don’t think the Pillman has been in there longer than 15 seconds.

It’s been about 85% Horsemen here and Morrus is sent to the floor. Pillman sends him into the railing and the laughing dude is starting to laugh. Bischoff says we’re awaiting word from the coroner for word about Hogan and his eye. I give up. Sullivan vs. Pillman now and the fight is on. Sullivan bites his face and wants blood. Anderson saves his partner and Anderson gets a broom broken over his back by someone we can’t see. The Dungeon (Morrus/Sullivan) beats on Pillman with the strap for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Basic brawl for the most part but the Sullivan vs. Pillman was interesting to say the least. It was some of the best acting that has ever happened in wrestling and evolved into Benoit vs. Sullivan. This feud went on forever and thankfully the NWO came in to end it. Basic match but it set up the PPV match well enough.

Marcus Bagwell vs. Ric Flair

Bagwell is an American Male here. Woman is with Flair now. Somehow he looks a bit more effeminate than she does. Paul Orndorff pops up at the announce booth and says you never know when payback is coming. Nothing ever came of this I don’t think. After a quick break we’re back with the bell. Savage has taken Hogan to the hospital. Better than the coroner I guess.

Basic start here as Bagwell beats Flair down for awhile. Yep this is Flair Formula personified. Bagwell uses basic stuff and is all fired up to be in there and having some success with Flair. Flair gets in a cheap shot and here he comes. It’s the same thing every time but it works. Bagwell gets a rollup for two to counter the Figure Four. He misses a crossbody and hits the floor though.

Here comes Flair with some stomps. Back in and we get the Flair knee drop. They slug it out in the corner with Bagwell taking over. And never mind as he gets kicked in the face to take him down. Bagwell gets back up and gets a middle rope suplex for two. Slingshot splash eats knees and I think it’s time to go to school. Yep and it’s over.

Rating: C. Not bad here and a nice little quick shot for Flair before the PPV. This is fine for what it was supposed to be as Bagwell gets to rub elbows with Flair and Flair gets a convincing victory over someone that he should be able to get a convincing victory over. This was fine.

Flair won’t let go until Savage makes the save.

Tag Titles: Road Warriors vs. Sting/Lex Luger

This is the blue period for the Warriors that looks stupid. Animal vs. Sting to start. LOUD LOD chant to start us off. Animal might have a bad back here. Naturally Sting works on the arm instead. Sting controls to start and gets a top rope clothesline for two. We come to a pause and Sting shouts to the crowd. See, that’s smart. He keeps the fans from getting cold and just a shout like that can do it.

Off to Hawk and Luger now. Is Sting the weakest person in the match somehow? Big shoulder tackle takes down Luger so it’s off to Sting again. The guy with more singles success moves out of the way of a charge in the corner but can’t get the Scorpion. Off to Animal who is sent into Luger as the champions take over. Luger hammers on the back as the fans chant for the challengers (Road Warriors if that wasn’t clear).

We take an unannounced break as the building lost power apparently. Bischoff implies WWF had something to do with it. What the heck??? TNT is letting the show go on a bit longer because this is a big match, meaning we’re officially beginning the overrun. Front facelock as this match is really pretty boring. Powerslam by Luger takes down Animal.

Everything breaks down and Luger gets a suplex on Animal but walks into a powerslam with no referee. Jimmy Hart comes out of nowhere and slips Luger some big metal plate that is apparently used to keep doors open. He drills Animal in the bad back with it to get the pin to retain. At least it’s over now.

Rating: F+. This was absolutely awful. These four never were able to have a good match together and this was no exception. Sting and Luger didn’t care and the Warriors were so far past their expiration date that it was unreal. Bad match indeed and an odd choice to end the show.

The Road Warriors demand a title shot at the winner of Sting/Luger vs. Harlem Heat, whenever that happens.

Overall Rating: C-. This was decent at times but at the end of the day it feels like it’s just there. Nothing really ever got going with it and while they kind of set up the PPV a bit at the same time this show didn’t need to happen and the PPV build would have been the same thing for the most part. Other than the Woman turn, nothing happened here at all. Not bad but not needed at all.

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Monday Nitro #58
Date: October 21, 1996
Location: Mankato Civic Center, Mankato, Minnesota
Attendance: 4,034
Commentators: Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan, Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko

It’s FINALLY the last show before Halloween Havoc which took forever to get to. The main event tonight is Benoit vs. Savage which should be good, although it probably won’t be up to their capabilities due to the whole Liz thing from last week. This should be a better show than last week’s which was nothing all that interesting. Let’s get to it.

We open with talking about Savage and the Liz tape from last week. Larry reiterates that WCW needs a leader.

Chris Jericho vs. Bobby Eaton

Should be good. Tony says Sting is here and has a match scheduled with JL. Syxx and NWO Sting are here. After a break we’re ready to go. Patrick is referee and is still hurt. Jericho speeds things up to start and hits a dropkick and shoulder block to control early. Eaton comes back with a bad powerslam for no cover. Jericho hits the springboard dropkick to put Eaton outside. If Jericho wasn’t so pale I’d think he was the Cheetah Kid from last week.

Eaton works on the arm back in the ring. They slug it out and this match probably needs to end soon. They’re just not clicking out there. Jericho sends him into the post and they hit the floor. The Canadian’s elbow hits the post but Eaton misses a shot and stumbles up the aisle. Back in and Eaton hooks a swinging neckbreaker for no cover. A top rope kneedrop mostly hits for two. Jericho hits something like a jumping superkick and then a missile dropkick for the pin.

Rating: D+. Really surprising here as the match didn’t click at all for the most part. The ending was a lot better but other than that they looked totally out of sync. Jericho would get a lot better and I don’t think Eaton would be around much longer after this. Jericho would get Syxx on Sunday.

Jericho says that in six days he’ll get the first win over the NWO. He actually would, but it wouldn’t be until World War 3.

Video on Mysterio and how awesome he is.

Dean Malenko vs. Jimmy Graffiti

Graffiti is more commonly known as Jimmy Del Ray of the Heavenly Bodies. Graffiti takes over early and looks pretty stupid in his shirt with the word Graffiti on it and jean shorts. A Batista Bomb gets two for Graffiti as does a superkick. Malenko comes back and knocks him to the floor where he lands on the top of his head. Fake Sting is watching this and filming it. This prompts Tony and Larry to discuss if Rey has joined the NWO.

Dean hits a clothesline in the corner and a suplex but the Cloverleaf is broken up. Graffiti gets in his bit of jobber offense and they both go to the floor off a Malenko cross body. Back in and Graffiti tries something resembling a dropkick but gets caught in a powerbomb kind of move. The Cloverleaf ends this clean. It gets the Power Pin of the Week which is a sponsorship thing despite it not being a pin.

Rating: C-. Just a long squash here as Graffiti was never any threat to Deano Machino. I really don’t know why they brought in Del Ray of all people but he was fine for a jobber role I suppose. Dean would get the title back from Rey on Sunday before losing it to Ultimo Dragon at Starrcade.

Diamond Dallas Page vs. Craig Pittman

We get a montage of Diamond Cutters before the match. Teddy is with Pittman here. He really didn’t have a good group of guys around this time. Teddy and Patrick get in an argument about 2 seconds after the bell rings. Page rams Pittman into Long to take over quickly. This has all the makings of a squash. Page pancakes him down for two. Pittman kicks out and shoves Page onto Patrick, injuring the referee’s back to a big pop. Out to the floor for a bit where Pittman works on the arm. Code Red (cross armbreaker) goes on but Teddy distracts the referee for no apparent reason. Diamond Cutter ends this.

After the too short to rate match, Teddy is accused of being NWO. He yells at Patrick and Patrick says it was Teddy’s fault, which is true.

Tony talks to Nick who says he didn’t hear Page give up. He’s accused of being the NWO referee again and he says it’s Randy Anderson again.

We look back at two weeks ago where Flair was attacked to write him off TV for his legit shoulder injury. We also see Jarrett challenging the Giant for Havoc.

Ron Studd vs. Jeff Jarrett

Flair comes out to watch this match. He gets in the ring before it starts and tells Jarrett to strut. The fans aren’t all that thrilled. Flair struts and gets cheered, so they do it again. Ric shakes Jarrett’s hand and that’s that. The match actually starts now and Studd is a giant. Jarrett manages a suplex and a bad figure four ends this.

Jarrett says it’s time for WCW to band together to take out the NWO. Also Giant won’t be able to chokeslam him. Flair comes up and says that he’ll be back to get his revenge for his injury.

Hour #2 begins. The announcers talk as usual.

Lex Luger vs. Roadblock

Roadblock weighs about 400lbs. He goes right after Luger and that doesn’t work all that well for him. A clothesline sends Roadblock to the floor and he’s rammed into various metal things. Back in Luger slams him but can’t hit the jumping elbow. In an inset interview, Anderson says that time is running out on Lex and he’ll make him quit Sunday. A kneedrop gets two for Roadblock. Luger starts Hulking Up and calls for the Rack but drops the big guy twice. The third time works and Roadblock insta-taps.

Rating: D+. Just a basic power match for a hero to show off like Luger did here. Roadblock was another huge guy that did practically nothing while the other guys would beat him up and it was supposed to be impressive. I think Luger would beat Anderson on Sunday in one of Anderson’s last big time matches.

Buy the NWO Shirt!

Lee Marshall is in Phoenix and Nitro is there next week. Why did they keep doing that? I still don’t get it.

Harlem Heat vs. American Males

Eric talks about the Braves beating New York tonight, which he says needs to become a tradition. It’s a jab at Vince so Heenan cracks up. Eric says this is non title but Patrick holds up the titles anyway. More WWF jabs as Riggs vs. Ray starts us off. Power vs. speed here with the power team taking over, hitting a World’s Strongest Slam to put Riggs down. Bagwell comes in and we talk about Savage a bit.

Marcus throws Stevie over the top but it’s momentum or whatever despite Bagwell THROWING HIM OVER THE ROPES. We take a break and come back with Booker getting worked over by Bagwell. Booker powerbombs him down and the Outsiders are here. The NWO wants Nitro apparently. Stevie pounds away and since that’s the extent of his offense it’s back to Booker. The Hangover misses and here’s Riggs again. Everything breaks down and Riggs goes after the Heat’s managers, allowing the Harlem Side Kick to end him.

Rating: D. This was really boring as the Heat seemed completely uninterested. The Males would be split up next month as Bagwell would turn heel for the first of about 8,000 times. This wasn’t much of a match and it wasn’t very good, primarily due to Booker having to do all of the work for his team.

Faces of Fear vs. Fantastics

The Fantastics? REALLY? They brought these guys out of mothballs? Don’t get me wrong: they were my favorite 80s NWA tag team so I’m not complaining, but this is late 1996. This falls under the category of Greg Valentine. This would be their only WCW match too. Fulton chops away at Meng and he’s like dude….no. The announcers talk about Savage some more and they’re not sure if he’s here, despite him being scheduled for the main event.

A double dropkick puts Meng on one knee and the announcers say that the Fantastics have no chance in this. Eric keeps telling us the Braves score because that’s required for some reason. Fulton tries to fight back and Eric laughs when he punches and kicks. A piledriver kills him dead but Fulton makes the save. The double headbutt hits and Eric is all happy because Sting might be here. Hot tag brings in Rogers and he gets in some offense but his cross body gets caught and a big boot from Meng ends this.

Rating: D-. I love the Fantastics, but I have NO idea what they were thinking bringing them in here. They looked old and pale and the Faces of Fear destroyed them. It was a total squash and Eric was burying them on commentary. It’s not like they were a regular team either. This was their only match in WCW and I think Rogers would go to ECW for awhile. I don’t get this one at all.

Remember that Liz video that Eric was afraid messed Savage up? Let’s watch it again, because that’ll get Randy’s head straight right? Liz still loves him is the point of this. Eric says he has more footage for later.

JL vs. Sting

And it’s the NWO Sting. The whole NWO comes out to watch. A few fans are fooled for a bit but it becomes clear what’s going on pretty quickly. The NWO comes out of the crowd sans Hogan. Total squash and the Deathlock looks to end it in like a minute, but the REAL Sting comes out. He’s in all black and has white facepaint. The match is thrown out.

Sting debuts the Death Drop and he destroys the Fake Sting. The NWO lets this happen so everyone thinks Sting is NWO. He hooks the Deathlock and the NWO comes in. DiBiase offers him a spot on the team and the whole team tries to tempt him. Eric is WAY too intense about this. I get that it’s supposed to be serious but he gets all melodramatic about it.

Hall asks a legit question: what does Sting have to show for carrying the WCW banner this whole time? Sting talks about the Fake Sting and says the real version may or may not be in their price range. The only thing for sure about him is that nothing’s for sure. He leaves and you can hear the money being printed from here.

Chris Benoit vs. Randy Savage

Eric has left to try to flag down Savage. Here’s Savage but he’s all in black and they’re “street clothes”. I’m not sure what street people walk down looking like that but I don’t think I want to be there. Eric apologizes and rolls some tape. It’s from the 3 Ninjas movie set with Hogan hosting things for lack of a better term. Hogan talks to the director and says he has a lot of things he needs to do and that it can’t go over budget.

The NWO takes over production of the film. Giant is the new director, Hogan is producing and Liz has a cameo. Hogan makes Liz say she loves Randy. Hogan is in a wig here and it’s really not working for him. This is really bad. Hogan sends Liz to his trailer with Giant escorting her. Hogan comes into the trailer and yells at her. He and Giant talk a bit more to end this.

Back in the arena Savage isn’t sure what to do. There’s no match of course. Savage says it just occurred to him how fragile friendships and relationships can be. Business and marriages can be fragile too. Life is also fragile and with that Savage leaves. Eric calls him back…and that’s it.

Overall Rating: D-. Really weak show here, which is the second in a row. Havoc sucked and the Savage vs. Hogan match was a big reason why. It wound up being a comedy match and Savage was just fine after the last two weeks of him being all mopey and depressed. This built up the PPV a bit but overall, there wasn’t much here. At least we don’t have to hear the words Slim Jim’s every 8 seconds now.

Here’s Halloween Havoc if you’re interested:

http://forums.wrestlezone.com/showthread.php?p=2182496#post2182496

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Monday Nitro #57
Date: October 14, 1996
Location: Mid-South Coliseum, Memphis, Tennessee
Attendance: 6,930
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tony Schiavone, Larry Zbyszko, Eric Bischoff, Bobby Heenan

We’re in Lawler country tonight as the seemingly never ending build for Halloween Havoc continues. Thankfully with this set of two I’ll be doing we’ll get to that show so we can get to November and Eric joining the NWO. The show tonight is nothing all that significant but we’re getting closer to 1997 which stuns me that we’ve gotten this far. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Savage getting destroyed while Liz was held and forced to watch.

Dean Malenko vs. Brad Armstrong

Armstrong beat Dean on either Saturday Night or at a Clash. There are NWO fans holding up big signs on the non-camera side, because the fans behind them don’t need to see right? Nick Patrick and his neckbrace are refereeing again. There’s an NWO chant. Brad speeds things up and sends Dean to the floor. Malenko is heel still here. Into the ring again and Dean hooks something like a seated abdominal stretch.

The announcers talk about Sting being gone for awhile already. Man they had no idea what was coming did they. Brad gets some two counts, including one off a nice Russian leg sweep. Belly to back gets the same. Dean gets a SWEET rollup into a three quarter nelson for the pin. Armstrong got caught.

Rating: C-. Fairly uninteresting mat based match here but I’ve seen far worse. Brad and Dean worked a more technically based style here and while it’s good, it doesn’t do much for the audience. That being said, they were more interested in the NWO stuff than the match, but that’s modern wrestling for you. Nothing great but it was fine.

The NWO gets here.

Jim Duggan vs. Mr. Wallstreet

This is a rematch because this is the feud the world is dying for right? The idea is that Nick Patrick screwed Duggan out of a win in the first match so this has a different referee. Duggan uses power to start as Larry blasts Hacksaw every chance he can. Wallstreet comes back with a clothesline for one and then goes to a chinlock. Larry talks about the amount of water in the average human’s brain for no apparent reason. Leg drop by Wallstreet and it’s off to a chinlock again. Wallstreet jumps into a boot and Duggan tapes up his fist. Wallstreet gets it away but the three point clothesline ends him.

Rating: D. What in the world was this on TV for? It wasn’t a bad match or anything, but it’s IRS vs. Jim Duggan in 1996 on national TV. I don’t get it at all but I’d assume it’s because Duggan is one of Hogan’s buddies. Not a horrible match, but for the life of me I don’t get it. This was a rematch on top of that. Why did it need to be on Nitro? Isn’t that what Saturday Night was for?

Hugh Morrus vs. Jim Powers

The inexplicable kind of push of Jim Powers continues. Tony thanks “Mr. Lawler” for promoting the show. He’ll be at the flea market on Thursday, which is where the USWA had a lot of their shows around this time. I’m legit surprised by that. Powers slams him down and gets a cross body for one. Morrus rolls to the floor and I’m still wondering why Powers is getting TV time.

Back in and Morrus remembers he’s against Jim Powers and takes over. Suplex gets two. Flair isn’t here tonight. Morrus seems really bored out there and I can’t say I disagree with him. Flair’s shoulder injury is worse than previously thought. It would result in him being stripped of the US Title I believe. Powers gets a sunset flip for two.

A knee lift puts Morrus down as Teddy is complaining about Patrick’s cadence of the count. Oh yeah it’s bad as it takes four seconds to count one. Powers gets a small package and there’s no count because Patrick is holding his neck. A belly to back sets up the No Laughing Matter for Morrus’ pin. The count was fine there. Teddy gets in Patrick’s face post match.

Rating: D-. I get the idea of Patrick being crooked and not counting properly and all that. That’s an old standard angle and it works fine. But why in the world are they using it on Jim freaking Powers? I don’t get it. He’s JIM POWERS. They couldn’t use this on anyone else? Was this really the best option they had? Not the Steiners or someone like that? I don’t get it.

Greg Valentine vs. Lex Luger

Again I don’t understand why Greg Valentine kept getting time on this show. He’s fine in the ring, but why him of all the people that were available? Luger has taped ribs due to the attack by Anderson last week. Valentine goes for the arms instead. That’s what we mean by lack of psychology. Thankfully he wakes up and punches Lex in the ribs to take over. Luger can’t suplex him because of the injury.

Valentine works on the back as Anderson is watching in the back on a monitor. Greg works on the back as DiBiase and Vincent are standing in the crowd watching. Hogan has demanded to make an announcement tonight. Valentine works on the back some more. I’m glad the arm work only lasted a few seconds. Tony and Larry want to know where Sting is because they need him.

Luger’s back is rammed into the corner and it’s been all Valentine for the most part here. They collide and both go down. Lex starts his comeback and hits the forearm smash for two. Valentine gets an elbow up and puts his feet on the ropes for a rollup. As he’s arguing with the referee the ribs heal enough for the Rack to get the submission. At least he was wincing during the hold.

Rating: D+. Not a horrible match or anything but it was almost eight minutes long. Just like in the previous match, I don’t get it. WCW made some curious moves at this point but at the same time you can’t say that the results didn’t work so the complaints would be at a minimum here. Actually they’re not even complaints but rather questions.

Tony talks to Nick Patrick and tells him that the fine against Randy Savage will be $500 instead of $1 million. Also Savage has to miss the first five matches (not said if that means the first five Nitros or not) of 1997. Patrick says WCW will be hearing from his lawyers. Tony shows us a clip from NWO Saturday Night which was the NWO segment where they would beat up jobbers in an empty arena. They had their own referee in a ski mask and it looked a lot like Patrick. He says it looks more like Randy Anderson, who is about 6 inches shorter than Patrick.

Mike Enos vs. Randy Savage

Hour #2 begins during Enos’ entrance. There’s no Bischoff for commentary. Oh ok he’s going to interview Savage during the entrance. Eric intercepts him and there’s a TV monitor wheeled in. Savage says if Hogan is here, let’s do Halloween Havoc here tonight. Eric wants to talk about Liz and Savage says don’t go there.

We look at a video message from Liz sitting on a swing in front of a tree. She says she’s sorry and that she was doing things to get his attention when she thought she was doing them out of anger. Savage built her this swing apparently. To the best of my knowledge, the fans can’t see any of this. Liz asks him for forgiveness and says she’s made a lot of bad choices. The worst was siding with Hulk so he could hurt Savage. Liz needs Savage and begs him not to leave her alone. She feels the same way about him today as the day she said I do.

Back in the arena and Savage looks stunned. Eric says he didn’t know another way to do this. You know, because locker rooms don’t exist right? Savage doesn’t know what to say and has a great look on his face. Eric won’t shut up and leave him alone so Savage walks out and heads into a conveniently waiting limo. No match with Enos obviously.

Eric is on commentary now. The announcers debate whether or not it was a good idea to tell Savage about the message.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Cheetah Kid

Cheetah is allegedly Rocco Rock in a mask but I’m not completely sure on that. Oh there’s no way that’s Rocco. He’s ripped and much darker skinned. Ah apparently Cheetah Kid is a character Rock used to play when he was starting out. That makes much better sense. Apparently this is a local guy from Memphis getting a tryout. Works for me. Eddie flies around a lot but gets caught in something resembling an Angle Slam for two.

A nice powerbomb gets no cover for Cheetah. This is really just a tuneup for Eddie before his match with DDP at Havoc. Eddie gets sent to the floor and Cheetah hits a springboard dropkick as Eddie is on the apron. Cheetah goes up and gets crotched so Eddie can hit the rana off the top and the Frog Splash for the pin. Not enough to rate but Cheetah wasn’t bad at all. I’m curious as to who he was.

Video on Jeff Jarrett.

Lee Marshall is on the road and talks about how great it’ll be next week in Minnesota. Ok then.

Big Bubba vs. Jeff Jarrett

Since this is in Tennessee Jarrett is very popular. Eric makes fun of Jarrett’s country singer gimmick and says it’s about wrestling here. Bubba gives him a chance to run and Jarrett doesn’t seem interested. We do a Memphis level stall as both do various kinds of taunting before Bubba grabs a headlock. Now we’re talking about the WWF for awhile and the AWA. Oh it’s Hogan who said he made both of those companies. Well the AWA collapsed after he left so maybe he didn’t make it but he kept it alive for awhile in a way.

Out to the floor and Bubba keeps control. Jimmy Hart gets in some shots and Jarrett glares him away. Off to a chinlock so Bubba can talk to Jeff a bit. He hits a solid big boot to put Jarrett down. The announcers get bored so they talk about the NWO for awhile. Big right hand gets two for Bubba. He misses a charge into the corner and Jarrett hits an atomic drop but goes after Hart before the Figure Four. Bubba hits a spinebuster and smacks the referee. Jimmy slides in the Megaphone which is dropkicked into Bubba’s face for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was a Memphis match for the Memphis crowd which doesn’t do a thing for the TV audience. That being said, they’ve had the last few months of shows booked for them so I can’t complain about something like that. Jarrett would be the replacement for Flair soon and would get into a feud with McMichael soon enough. He wouldn’t get over or anything, but who cares about that.

Jarrett is announced as the replacement for Flair.

Harlem Heat vs. Faces of Fear

This was supposed to be for the titles but the Heat said no so it would be a guaranteed title match against the Outsiders. Meng vs. Booker starts us off and Meng hammers him down quickly. Here are Benoit, Mongo and Debra for no apparent reason. Oh that’s right they’re scouting the Faces of Fear for the PPV. Stevie comes in and hammers on Meng but after missing a dropped elbow it’s off to Barbarian.

Stevie hits a bicycle kick to put Barbarian down. Come on people, learn your racial stereotypes. He chokes away and brings in Booker to give some variety to things. Hook kick gets two. Meng breaks up what was presumably the missile dropkick and Barbarian hits a belly to belly superplex. Back to Meng who hits a Batista Bomb for two. A double headbutt has Booker in trouble but Meng won’t cover.

Booker gets a bad looking sunset flip and the Outsiders are here. They’re in the front row this time and the match comes grinding to a halt again. Everyone stops to look at them on the floor and I think it’s a double countout. Knowing this show there was a pin in the ring and we just didn’t see it but whatever.

Rating: D. Total clash of styles here and it didn’t work well at all. Everyone was pretty much just killing time until the Outsiders came out for the match to end. I’m going to assume it was a no contest. I guess it makes sense for this not to be for the titles but it wouldn’t have hurt anything I don’t think.

Eric talks about Savage and how Hogan is going to be in trouble at Havoc.

Here’s Hogan for the final segment of the show. The rest of the NWO complete with Liz comes out behind him. Current total number of males in the NWO: 8. Hogan thinks Savage could at least come out here and fight. He talks about being in Hollywood filming the next 3 Ninjas movie and can push whatever button he wants on Savage. Hogan calls Liz an actress and she tries to slap him but fails.

Here come the Nasty Boys in NWO shirts. Hogan calls them family and says if they need anything just to let him know. Knobbs has the contract and says there’s a screwup in it because the decimal point isn’t right. Hogan hasn’t signed it and says the Nasties shouldn’t have the shirts on yet. There’s the beatdown for the Nasties. Hogan says this is just a little bit of what will happen to Savage at Havoc. He says Liz wanted him when she and Savage were married. Liz is coming with him to Hollywood to finish his movie.

The NWO takes over the broadcast booth again to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Not their best show here as it feels like we’ve been building up to Havoc for six months at this point. The whole Savage vs. Liz thing is interesting but it’s nothing that was going to go anywhere since Savage would join the NWO early next year anyway. Thank goodness the next show is the last one before the PPV because it needs to move on to WW3 already. Weak show but not awful.

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Clash of the Champions 18
Date: January 21, 1992
Location: Kansas Expo Center, Topeka, Kansas
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Jim Ross

Time for another Clash, but this time it’s from a better era. This is during the Dangerous Alliance period, where the top heels in the company banded together to fight Sting and whoever he could get to back him up. However, he needed to win the world title first nad we need to set up that match tonight. Also we get Cactus Jack vs. Van Hammer in a falls count anywhere match which I remember fairly well. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Heyman wanting to take over the company with the Dangerous Alliance.

As usual Eric and Missy are more or less the hosts.

Vader/Mr. Hughes vs. Steiner Brothers

Scott vs. Hughes gets us going. The Steiners are insanely popular. Scott throws Hughes around for a few minutes and that’s exactly what I wanted to see. That’s what the Steiners were awesome at: throwing big guys around like it was no big deal. Hughes powers him to the corner and everything breaks down. The Steiners get sent to the floor so they wait for the monsters to pose and both go to the top at the same time. A double Steiner Line off the same corner gives the Steiners the momentum again.

Vader vs. Rick now and Vader goes old school monster on him. There’s a gorilla press and a splash in the corner but Rick keeps getting up because that’s what he does. Steiner Line takes Vader down and there’s an overhead belly to belly (great one too). Rick knocks him to the floor and dives off the apron, but gets caught and rammed into the post. Back in and Rick throws Vader off the top with a belly to belly superplex.

Off to Scott and the Steiners are all fired up here. Scott gets the best German suplex you’ll ever see to a guy the size of Vader. He goes up but his cross body is countered into a powerslam and a splash keeps Scott down. Tag to Hughes and it’s off to Rick soon thereafter. HUGE backdrop and Hughes is in trouble. Everything breaks down again and Vader accidentally hits Hughes. Vader and Scott go to the floor and the Steiner Bulldog ends Hughes.

Rating: B. That’s probably high but I’m a sucker for the Steiners throwing everyone all over the place like it’s nothing. They were so far and away better than all of the other teams at this point and it was very clear. Anderson and Eaton were champions at this point and the Steiners would get the titles back in just a few months.

Terry Taylor/Tracy Smothers vs. Brian Pillman/Marcus Bagwell

Tracy is still part of the Young Pistols and Taylor is the Taylor Made Man. According to Ross, a standard backhand chop is a judo chop. Didn’t know that. Pillman cleans house on his own and speeds things up but walks into a backbreaker for two. Off to Bagwell and the good guys clear the ring with a double dropkick. There are some double dives to the outside and Taylor/Smothers are in trouble.

We get back to normal with Bagwell vs. Smothers and Tracy hits what was either a dropkick or a superkick to take over. We hear about Bagwell hanging out with Sting a lot lately as Tracy beats him up. He avoids a shot though and here’s Pillman again. A spinwheel kick gets two for Pillman. The heels double team to slow Brian down and Taylor suplexes him to the floor.

Pillman gets rammed into the post which gets two back in the ring for Tracy. Gutwrench powerbomb gets the same for Taylor. Back to Smothers and a jumping back elbow sends Pillman out to the barricade again. He comes back in with a springboard clothesline and it’s hot tag to Bagwell. Everything breaks down and Bagwell gets a surprise sunset flip on Smothers for the three count.

Rating: C+. Fun tag match here with Pillman flying all over the place and just being awesome. Smothers and Taylor are two guys that I’m not wild on but they did their thing here and it worked well enough. Bagwell was still a glorified rookie at this point but he never really developed past anything slightly above average, which is pretty telling.

Video on Jushin Thunder Liger. He and Pillman will tear the house down at SuperBrawl II for the Light Heavyweight Title which Liger recently won from Pillman.

Richard Morton vs. Johnny B. Badd

Badd is pretty new at this point and is still the gay character that we don’t acknowledge as being gay. He takes off the rainbow colored robe to put on a pink and blue boa. Badd has to fire the Badd Blaster (confetti gun) before we can get going. He tries to punch Morton so Morton wisely hides in the ropes. Double axe off the middle rope gives Badd control. A bad looking atomic drop by Morton lets him send Badd to the floor. Badd gets a sunset flip for two. This isn’t meshing at all. Powerslam gets two for Johnny. They slug it out and Morton tries a cross body which Badd rolls through for the pin.

Rating: F. Just awful here and the ending looked horrible with Morton barely running when he hit the cross body. It took Badd a few years but he would get way better. The Light Heavyweight division never worked like it was supposed to because they had no idea that there was a difference between being small and knowing how to wrestle small.

Badd and Pillman are with Bischoff and Badd puts a lips sticker on Eric’s cheek. They both want to fight Liger. Pillman gives a bizarre speech about Japanese automakers and how he’s defending the honor of Americans and bringing the title back to America. And then Badd puts lips on Brian’s cheek, earning him a right hand. I have no idea if that was a heel promo or not.

PN News vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Page is a manager recently turned wrestler and more or less is a jobber here. News is a very fat white rapper. He raps a bit before the match. This makes JR’s from two nights ago look bearable. Page (in a singlet) jumps him to start and they try running the ropes for a few seconds, but News can’t do it due to high levels of fat. News tries a dropkick to send Page to the floor as the announcers shill the WCW Hotline. All News until he misses an elbow. Page hammers away and gets two off a Russian legsweep. For some reason he tries a slam and guess how well that goes. News hits a belly to belly and a top rope splash for the pin.

Rating: D-. Barely better than the previous match but Page was trying. The problem was that he wasn’t very good yet. News….you’re fat and you need to go away. The match was nothing to see and was there to get News on TV, because WCW was stupid enough to think that was a good idea.

Here’s the WCW Top Ten.

10. Larry Zbyszko
9. El Gigante
8. Big Van Vader
7. Dustin Rhodes
6. Cactus Jack
5. Rick Steiner
4. Ricky Steamboat
3. Steve Austin
2. Sting
1. Rick Rude

Kip Allen Frey is introduced as the new boss of WCW. Why WCW insisted on having actual executives on TV as the boss characters is beyond me. They FINALLY woke up in like 1995 and had a character played by a wrestler (I mean Bockwinkel, not Watts, who actually was the boss). Frey was actually really good at what he did though, and SuperBrawl II would be proof of that. He had a very interesting policy: whoever had the best match at a televised show received (I believe) a $5000 cash bonus. Think that might get people motivated? He announces Sting vs. Luger for the title at SuperBrawl II.

The other thing Frey does is bring out the newest WCW color commentator: Jesse Ventura. This was a legit big deal and was probably the first high profile guy they took from Vince in a very long time. Jesse puts over WCW as the future and says he’ll be debuting soon, which also was at SuperBrawl.

Tony brings out Sting who high fives Jesse on the way to the ring. Luger (recorded) says he’s been gone to get ready for the match. In reality, he only had one contracted appearance left so he just sat out for two months. His match with Sting was HORRIBLE, and in one of the rare instances in history, it can be completely blamed on one guy instead of two as Luger didn’t care at all and gave maybe a 4% effort. Sting signs and the match is on.

For those of you wondering about Frey, he would be fired after the PPV because of an unspecified reason. The common answer is he was actually good at his job and that was simply unacceptable in WCW.

Cactus Jack vs. Van Hammer

Hammer was a guy that made David Otunga look like Lou Thesz in the ring, but man was he popular. After Sting and Hogan, he was probably my favorite when I was a kid. Jack is a crazy man and this is falls count anywhere. Hammer has a guitar with him and fires something out of the end of it into Jack’s eyes. A slingshot cross body gets two about a second after the bell.

A big leg gets one (he would usually use a big boot beforehand. Hammer was tall and blonde. You figure it out) and Jack takes over. Cactus Clothesline puts them on the floor where Cactus gets two. Jack peels back the mats on the floor and jumps off the second rope with a sunset flip, hurting himself more than Hammer. They’re on the ramp now and we get a wrestling hold in the form of a sleeper by Jack.

Powerslam on the ramp gets two for Hammer. This is a very hard hitting match. Jack keeps clotheslining him down while Hammer tries to wrestle. Hammer throws Jack off the ramp where he lands with a thud. A clothesline to the floor gets two. They brawl to the back as the fans boo (no big screens yet) and we take a break. The stuff after the break was taped earlier, because it’s 1992 and that’s how they rolled back then.

They’re out in the parking lot and Jack hits him with a 2×4. A traffic cone to the head and they fight over to the bulls that are in place for an upcoming rodeo. Missy Hyatt is there to get on my nerves. Hammer chokes him with a rope so they climb into the pen with the bulls. Abdullah the Butcher pops up dressed as a cowboy and whacks Hammer with a shovel by mistake so Jack can get the pin.

Rating: B-. Before the break, this was a SICK brawl. Post break, it goes downhill quickly. Butcher as a cowboy is a very strange vision and not one that I need to see every day. Hammer would never really mean much after this which is probably the best thing that could have happened to everyone involved. It has nothing on Sting vs. Jack but it’s still good.

Butcher and Jack fight a bit with Butcher throwing Missy into a water trough.

Freebirds vs. Brad Armstrong/Big Josh

The Birds are now faces and no one cared. I mean no one AT ALL cared. They’re still singers and have a song nowhere near as good as Badstreet USA. They dance through the crowd and I want this to end already. Big Josh is a lumberjack that liked to dance with bears. Armstrong used to be a Freebird lackey in a mask (never acknowledged as the same guy). Hayes and Armstrong start us off.

The Birds, despite being a long running tag team, really doesn’t work together all that well. Granted that might be due to Garvin not being all that good. Off to Josh who has far better luck. He stomps on Hayes’ ribs and I think this is face vs. face but I’m really not sure. Back to Garvin and Josh punches him for awhile too. They ram heads which has no effect on Garvin at all. Back to Armstrong who hits a bunch of dropkicks. Everything breaks down and the Birds cheat to hit a double DDT on Armstrong for the pin.

Rating: F. This was one of the worst tag matches I’ve ever seen. The song didn’t help either with the title being “I’m a Freebird, What’s Your Excuse?” This was horrible and thankfully the Birds weren’t around much longer after this. It didn’t work at all and was one of the worst matches I can remember in a long time.

Video on the Steiners and how awesome they are. We get some clips of them winning huge matches and hear about Scott’s arm tearing apart and putting him on the shelf for a long time.

The Steiners say they’ll get the titles back because they never lost them fairly.

Vinnie Vegas vs. Tommy Rich

Vegas is more famous by his real name: Kevin Nash. Vegas is in suspenders, a white collared shirt and dress pants. Snake Eyes end this in less than a minute.

Dangerously says that someone is getting taken out tonight. He lists off what might happen to each of them and it’s classic Heyman. You can see in his eyes how fired up he is here. He gets in the great line of someone is going to the Magnum TA Wrestling Retirement Home.

Arn Anderson/Bobby Eaton/Larry Zbyszko vs. Barry Windham/Dustin Rhodes/Ron Simmons

Windham still has a bad hand due to Zbyszko. Eaton vs. Windham starts us off and Barry is all fired up. It works against him though and he gets caught in a superplex which he no sells. Big lariat puts Bobby down and Windham hits his own lariat (his finisher) for two. Everything breaks down and the Alliance is all put in Figure Fours. Off to Larry vs. Ron with Larry trying to use power on him for some reason. Arn and Larry combined can’t overpower him.

Ron is beating them up all on his own. For some reason Barry and Dustin just let him fight on his own and to be fair, it’s working pretty well. Off to Dustin and they work on Larry’s arm. Bobby comes in and Dustin is all fired up, throwing him over the top (behind the referee’s back) and hitting a huge diving clothesline to the ramp. Off to Larry vs. Barry and Barry misses a lariat. That’s the big feud to this match as Zbyszko and Anderson broke Barry’s hand at Halloween Havoc.

Off to Dustin and he misses a cross body, sending him flying and therefore crashing onto the ramp. Dustin takes a cell phone shot to the ribs and the Alliance is in control. Back in the Anderson Spinebuster gets two. Dustin gets in some punches but walks into a DDT. Arn’s cover is delayed though so it’s only two. Off to Eaton who hits a top rope elbow instead of the Alabama Jam for two.

Eaton misses a corner charge but Anderson saves the tag. Then we get to the big problem Arn has in his matches. Dustin is on the mat and Arn goes to the middle rope. He jumps off with a double axe handle and Dustin hits a boot to the jaw. What in the world was Arn going for, since he was jumping at the feet of Dustin the whole time? Either way it’s off to Barry vs. Larry Z and everything breaks down. Eaton comes off the top and jumps into the cast on Barry’s hand and that’s good for the pin.

Rating: B. Very fun tag match here and it shows the reason the Dangerous Alliance worked: everyone on the team was REALLY good and considering they only feuded with talented guys, the matches were almost a guaranteed awesome showcase. JR called the Alliance an All-Star team in this match and that’s about as good of a description as you can give them.

Tony is with the winning team in the back and Barry says he doesn’t care who says what because he’s coming for revenge. Awesome stuff again as Windham is all fired up.

Sting/Ricky Steamboat vs. Rick Rude/Steve Austin

Austin is TV Champion and Rude is US Champion. My goodness Sting is ridiculously popular. Remember that Top Ten thing earlier? Check out #1-#4. Steamboat vs. Austin starts us off and Austin still has hair here. Jesse has joined commentary to replace Tony here. Ricky takes over to start and Steve has no idea what to do with him. Steamboat gets a bunch of two counts on Steve and fires off a superkick to knock him down. Rude takes a kick as well and the ring is cleared.

Rude comes in and he wants Sting. He slaps some of the paint off him and here’s the Stinger to the biggest pop of the night. Rude, ever the heel, hides in the corner immediately. Sting hits a pair of atomic drops and we get the best selling ever of that move. Sting rakes the back and we get some classic Jesse/face commentator banter of how can Sting do that and claim to be a hero.

Sting hooks a modified camel clutch for some reason. Rude’s ribs are his strong point so why put a hold on them? Now it’s Steamboat and they do the non-tag thing. The fans swear they did though and that’s good enough. They do it again as Austin tries to come in. JR, speaking of Sting: “Well he’s the legal man! That’s what you want right?” Sting tries to cannonball down onto Rude’s ribs but does the Anderson spot and lands balls first on the knees.

Austin vs. Sting in what would have drawn at least seven figure buys in 1998. Rude hooks a front facelock and keeps Sting from tagging. Back to Austin who punches the mat in an attempt to block a sunset flip and there’s the hot tag to Steamboat. Rude takes his head off as Sting was trying to come in and the Alliance controls some more. Austin avoids a rollup and everything breaks down. Sting and Austin fight up the ramp and then they come back. That was kind of pointless but whatever. Austin picks up Steamboat but Sting dives off the top with a crossbody and both pin Austin at the same time.

Rating: B. Remember the previous reason as why the six man was good? Same reason here but with four guys and better talent involved. The Alliance angle had YEARS worth of material in it but instead they lasted about six months because this is WCW. The Alliance was one of the greatest gatherings of talent ever, but it never became a memorable team because of WCW’s incompetence in promoting stars.

By the way, everything in that last sentence starting with the word one was from Arn Anderson, not me. So it’s not just my opinion but from someone on the team itself.

Rude and Austin annihilate Steamboat post match, whipping him with a belt as Sting tries to protect him.

Overall Rating: B+. This was a free TV show and we got pretty much 80% good stuff. When’s the last time you remember 80% of Raw or Impact being good to very good? The first half of 1992 was pure gold for WCW and once Luger’s laziness left and Sting got the title, it was all gravy for a long time. Then Vader came in and Sting had his best matches ever with him, so it got even better. Good show, but I still like 17 better I think.

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Road Wild 1999
Date: August 14, 1999
Location: Sturgis, South Dakota
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Tony Schiavone, Mike Tenay, Bobby Heenan

We’re back to South Dakota and the big biker rally (free tickets baby!) for the final one of these usually bad shows. The main event tonight is Hogan vs. Nash, title vs. career. Did I mention Nash was booking around this point? For a counterpoint to this, you might want to check out the Halloween Havoc review I just posted because it paints a nice contrast with Russo being the writer as opposed to Nash here. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about Hogan vs. Nash and establishes the circumstances. It’s Hogan’s title and career vs. just Nash’s career. Oh well it’s not like the title means anything by this point anyway.

The announcers spend way too much time running down the card, which includes Dennis Rodman vs. Randy Savage in Savage’s final WCW match.

We recap the Cruiserweight six man which resulted in the formation of the Filthy Animals. They feuded with Vampiro and tie Insane Clown Posse because….well because someone had to I guess.

Vampiro/Insane Clown Posse vs. Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman/Eddie Guerrero

They aren’t called the Filthy Animals yet and Rey is Cruiserweight Champion. Raven is here with the clowns too. Big brawl to start and the Animals take over with speed and talent. Eddie hits his slingshot headbutt and Vampiro is in trouble. Eddie and Vampiro speed things up and the ICP do their usual array of stomping. The announcers are pushing the band as hard as they can for cross promotional stuff and it’s not clicking at all. The bikers aren’t helping.

The Clowns beat on Eddie and I feel so sorry about him having to do this. Vampiro finally comes back in and Eddie is allowed to actually do something, climbing the ropes for a springboard rana which looked great. A Rock Bottom puts Eddie down for two. A superplex puts Shaggy down and it’s a double tag to bring in Rey and Jay. Everything breaks down and they head outside where Raven cheats, allowing Vampiro to hit the Nail in the Coffin on Rey.

Rey gets beaten down for awhile which is a sign of his greatness as he’s able to make guys even as bad as the Clowns look passable. Vampiro comes in with a release powerbomb which looked cool. Tony says Vampiro has a lot of strength. He does? Shaggy hits a powerslam and Rey is tossed to the floor again. The ring is up on a platform so the sound is a lot better for the crashes on the floor.

Raven, even the nutjob, yells at Rey but doesn’t hit him. It looks like he’s pretending to cry, which I guess is a mental game of some sort. Shaggy doesn’t cover because he’s an idiot and charges into the corner like the idiot that he is. Rey gets a boot up and brings in Kidman who cleans house. Everything breaks down and the Filthy Animals speed things way up. Eddie hits a huge dive onto Vampiro and Kidman pins Shaggy with the Shooting Star Press.

Rating: B-. Again, amazing what happens when you let talented guys have some time in a wrestling ring. The match was perfectly fine for an opener to get the crowd going. That’s what cruiserweights are for and with a stacked face team like that, you knew you were going to get something fun. Good stuff and already WAY better than Halloween Havoc would be.

We recap the tag title feud. The Jersey Triad (no not THAT Jersey Triad, although that would have been awesome) had the titles and could use the Freebird Rule, but that was changed so that it meant every match could be 3-2. Harlem Heat reunited to take them on and here’s the match where only two of the champions are allowed to team at once. Dusty Rhodes had taken over the championship committee from the crooked Flair so the Freebird Rule was switched to just a regular version of it.

Tag Titles: Jersey Triad vs. Harlem Heat

It’s Kanyon and Bigelow here. Bigelow’s belt falls off as he comes out because he’s fat. Big brawl to start and they botch something. I’m really surprised that Bigelow, who looks like a biker, is getting booed here at a biker rally. Ray vs. Kanyon finally gets us started. The announcers are actually breaking the match down and talking about how the Heat are rusty but are brothers so they work together naturally. See how much better it works when you talk about the match?

Stevie slams both of them and the Triad chills on the floor for a bit. Kanyon comes in and wants Booker so here we go again. We talk about Charles Robinson being a biased referee which again pertains to the match. I don’t know how to handle this. They remedy themselves by talking about the main event a bit as this match is going nowhere. The reason would be that the Triad is chilling on the floor.

Ok so it’s Stevie vs. Bigelow now. Off to Kanyon after Bigelow takes him down after some, shall we say, really boring stuff. Time for a chinlock as we’re waiting on the hot tag to Booker so we can get to the ending of the match. The champions set for a spike…something (piledriver I think) but Stevie slingshots Kanyon into Bigelow for a crotching. Here’s Booker to clean house but the Axe Kick is broken up. Everything breaks down and here’s DDP for interference. He accidentally rams into Bigelow though and a missile dropkick by Booker gives the Heat their 8th tag titles.

Rating: D+. Not the worst tag match I’ve ever seen but it could have been a lot better. Kanyon and Bigelow were probably the weakest combination they could have thrown out there, but Page has a singles match later in the show. The Heat would hold the titles for 8 days so it’s not like this was any huge title reign or switch.

We recap the West Texas Rednecks vs. The Revolution which is really just an extension of a short feud between Saturn and Hennig. It turned into a big gang war.

West Texas Rednecks vs. The Revolution

It’s Hennig/Barry Windham/Bobby Duncum Jr. vs. Saturn/Douglas/Malenko. What is with all the tag matches so far tonight? Big brawl to start and the Revolution clears the ring. Officially we start with Windham vs. Malenko but Saturn and Douglas come in quickly off two tags. Saturn chops away at Duncum and then it’s back to Windham. Saturn gets beaten down and my mind wanders a bit due to boredom.

Off to Dean who does a little something and then it’s back to Douglas who can’t quite get the Pittsburgh Plunge. Now it’s his turn to get beaten down and this match is going nowhere. Duncum gets a shoulderbrekaer for two. There’s nothing to talk about in this match at all. It’s been about two minutes since I last typed anything. Saturn comes in and everything breaks down. Malenko hooks Hennig in the Cloverleaf but Barry’s brother Kendall makes the save. Death Valley Driver on Duncum ends this.

Rating: D+. Well that match existed. There’s nothing else to say about it other than that: it happened. It wasn’t really good, it wasn’t really bad, but it happened. There wasn’t really a story here other than “we don’t like each other” which isn’t exactly something that’s going to carry a match. Next.

We recap Miller vs. Bagwell. Miller said he could dance, Bagwell imitated him, Bagwell stole his shoes, let’s have a match.

Ernest Miller vs. Buff Bagwell

Miller is a heel with Sonny Onoo managing him. Both guys say stuff before the match. I don’t particularly care, so I don’t bother listening. Feeling out process to start and Cat poses a lot. The fans chant pussy cat which is about as interesting as this is going to get isn’t it? We’re almost three minutes in and NOTHING has happened. Bagwell gets things going so Cat hits him low right in front of the referee but it’s not a DQ for no apparent reason.

Miller takes over and Sonny keeps cheating. As annoying as he was, Sonny at least knew how to cheat, which is a lost art anyway. Time for a chinlock and Tony thankfully talks about Hogan vs. Nash. Buff hits a suplex to put both guys down. END THIS ALREADY! Buff starts his comeback and gets a crossbody for two. Sonny gets on the apron with a briefcase and Cat is rammed into it so Bagwell can badly mess up a rollup for the pin.

Rating: F. Whoever thought this deserved eight minutes should have a horse attached to all of their limbs while someone tells the horses to run as fast as they can. Or even worse, made to watch this match. Terribly boring and I can think of a total of zero reasons as to why this was on PPV.

Miller beats him up post match.

We recap Page vs. Benoit. Benoit won the US Title recently and Page has been saying that Benoit wasn’t ready. Mama was mentioned and IT’S ON!

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Benoit won the title off the joke of David Flair so this is the first decent PPV title defense in months. Page apologizes to Benoit’s mother before the match but implies….some rather mean things about her personal life. The belt is the old US Title design but it looks different for some reason, almost like a replica. This is No DQ. Benoit immediately kicks him low and the beating is on. Page tries the helicopter bomb (love that move) but Benoit counters and sends him to the floor. Baseball slide gives him control and they head to the floor, as in the part below the platform.

Back to the ring and Page tries a German. Benoit is like dude….no. Page settles for a belly to belly for two and takes over. He hits something like a hybrid F5 and Wasteland for a delayed two. Page works on the ribs and they exchange quick pin attempts. Gorgeous spinebuster gets two. Page beats away for a long time and the No DQ aspect hasn’t meant much at all yet.

They go to the corner where Benoit gets caught in the Tree of Woe. Page finally gets a little violent, whipping his ribs with his belt. Time for some choking with the belt, including Page putting Benoit on his shoulders to hang him. Benoit uses the ropes to escape and whips Page. Three Rolling Germans get two.

He loads up the Swan Dive but Kanyon comes in for the save. The Revolution is in the back watching but doesn’t come in. Page is sent into Kanyon which gets two for Benoit. Bigelow runs out and hits a top rope splash for two on Benoit. Bigelow is sent into Kanyon (bad match for him) and Bigelow accidentally hits Page low. The Swan Dive keeps the belt in Canada.

Rating: C+. Not exactly a huge brawl but they pushed Benoit pretty strong here. This would have been a good push if Sid hadn’t killed Benoit dead for the title the next month and the following month Rick Steiner hadn’t beaten Benoit for the TV Title, but that’s WCW for you. No wonder Benoit bailed. I can’t say I wouldn’t have done the same.

We give away a motorcycle.

We recap Sting vs. Sid. It’s basically Sid is on a monster heel push and says he’ll be the Millennium Man so he’s beating up everyone in the company and tonight’s it’s Sting’s turn. Goldberg and Rick Steiner were involved also and are in a match later.

Sting vs. Sid Vicious

Sid stalls to start and it’s power vs. speed here. That’s kind of different as Sting is usually a power guy. Sid gets knocked to the floor and we stall some more. Sting knocks him into the crowd a few times. This is really just gussied up stalling. Back inside and the Stinger Splash misses to give Sid a chance. Tony explains that the guys in this match want to pin each other. I know WCW fans weren’t the smartest in the world but come on now.

Off to a chinlock which isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. I mention this because we’re in front of about 5,000 drunk bikers, so take a guess as to how they react to it. Out to the floor now for a change of pace. My goodness there are some ugly people at this show. Time now for another chinlock and Sting is kind of snuggling up to Sid’s crotch. Well there goes my childhood hero.

Sid channels his inner Flair for no apparent reason and goes up, only to get slammed down. It doesn’t really work as Sid trips Sting (as in puts his leg out so that Sting falls over it) to take over again. Sid wouldn’t be so boring if he wasn’t so slow. I mean he waits FOREVER to do any move he uses. For absolutely no apparent reason Sid goes up again and a superplex puts him down. Two Stinger Splashes have Sid in trouble but he catches the third in the chokeslam for the clean pin.

Rating: D+. Boring match but Sid’s push was pretty solid around this time. You know, until he turned face for no real apparent reason and shattered his leg and ended his career for like five years. Not much to see here though but it’s cool to see a clean ending, given what was coming in just a few months for this company.

We recap Goldberg vs. Rick Steiner which is really just setting up another victim for Goldie as we built to Sid vs. Goldberg at Havoc.

Rick Steiner vs. Goldberg

The announcers try to push Steiner as having a chance here. That’s hilarious. Well not really because that means I’d be laughing, which I’m not. They’ve changed Goldberg’s song to a Megadeath one now too because the original just didn’t work anymore I guess. You know, probably the most famous song in WCW not associated with the NWO. The fans chant for him still so maybe there’s not much to it.

They go straight to the corner and Goldberg runs him over. Steiner tries a jumping back elbow and he looks like a helicopter. A superkick puts Rick down and Heenan says Goldberg is a once in a lifetime find. Naturally WCW messed him up and made him lose to Nash but whatever. Steiner goes after the knee, which is weak or something from what I can figure out.

He wraps the knee brace around his fist to pound on Goldberg which isn’t a DQ either. Tony actually explains it because it’s not a foreign object. Why isn’t that the case more often? It makes sense, but you never hear that explanation. Steiner hammers on the knee and this is going to be short. You can feel it. Belly to belly gets two. What was called a DDT (it looked awful and was clear that Goldberg was falling forward instead of Rick pulling him, worst I’ve EVER seen) gets the same. And then Goldberg is tired of getting beaten on so he makes his comeback and hits the finishers for the pin. And that’s that.

Rating: D. I see no reason as to why this wasn’t on PPV. It’s less than six minutes and Goldberg seemingly got bored before firing back and hitting his finishing sequence for the pin. Not much to see here and it was a pretty boring match. Goldberg would hurt his arm at the beginning of the year so it’s not like this went anywhere. He would feud with Bret (not on this card) to end the year.

We recap Dennis Rodman vs. Savage and yes, this is really happening. Savage promises that Gorgeous George will be here and protected by the driver of the Hummer. See Bash at the Beach 99 for an explanation of that one which I’m not getting into.

Randy Savage vs. Dennis Rodman

Rodman comes out in a boxing robe. This would be Savage’s last match until he was at the second monthly TNA PPV. Rodman runs his mouth a bit first and yep he’s wasted. They go to the floor immediately and I’m assuming this is No DQ or hardcore or something. The announcers probably hurt themselves diving on the floor to suck Rodman off for using bare bones offense.

A Russian Legsweep gets a HUGE reaction from the announcers as they marvel over his skills. And there goes the referee for no apparent reason but Rodman hit him anyway. Not that it matters because a second one comes in but whatever. Schiavone thinks that due to some of the stuff Rodman has done that Savage, one of the best EVER, might respect him now. Give me a break.

Now Savage beats up a WCW.com photographer so he can hit Rodman with a camera for two. Down goes referee #2 and the third one goes down as soon as he hits the ring. Rodman knocks Savage to the floor, making him the second consecutive guy to land on the .com guy in a row. They fight up the ramp and I use that term loosely. Actually I use both terms loosely as it’s designed to look like a road.

Savage is sent into the trash as they go behind the set. We get to the infamous spot of the match where Rodman is thrown into a Porta-Potty which is tipped over. They go back to the ring and Rodman jumps off the middle rope to take out the fourth referee. Here’s Gorgeous George (sans bodyguard) as Rodman cuddles Savage. Oh ok so that was a sleeper. George hands Savage a chain then hits Rodman low. A chain shot ends this.

Rating: F. Just…no. You can figure out the reasons why it gets this rating on your own I believe.

We recap Hogan vs. Nash which is title/career vs. career. Hogan turned face again recently before this so it’s not like there’s any real secret to this one.

WCW World Title: Kevin Nash vs. Hulk Hogan

The announcers try to push this as the biggest match ever and do it in the quiet voices so you know they’re serious. The fans are completely behind Hogan which I think everyone expected to be the case, which probably has something to do with the yellow and red coming back. Nash shoves him around until Hulk takes off the bandana to show he’s serious. Nothing to talk about so far.

Nash grabs a headlock as the announcers talk about how great they are. At least it’s the main event and an actual big showdown for that for once. I’m sorry but I can’t buy Jarrett vs. DDP as the biggest match ever. Hogan shoves him to the floor and we stall a bit. Time for a test of strength and Hogan goes to one knee. Of course the cheering brings him back up and Nash hits a knee to the stomach to take over.

We get to the regular match now as Nash uses his power game to keep Hogan down. There really isn’t anything special to mention here as it’s a Hogan 80s match all over again. The big man beats them down, the finisher hits, Hogan comes back. I have a feeling I could not type anything for about five minutes and that would be accurate. Hogan makes a brief comeback with ten punches in the corner but Nash takes over again soon. I’m right as Nash beats him down, hits the Jackknife for two, Hogan Hulks Up and the leg drop gives Nash a few months off. Oh and Hogan was busted.

Rating: D. It’s a Hogan vs. a monster match and that’s all well and good….in 1986. The problem is that this is 1999 and therefore not exactly a cutting edge match. It was about 12 minutes long and there’s nothing we haven’t seen a few hundred times before. You would think for Hogan vs. Nash, one of the few mega main events they had left that they would give it more than this but whatever.

Overall Rating: D. The show is bad, but it’s the boring kind of bad which is a lot worse than bad bad. The problem here is that there’s really nothing to make fun of. It just keeps going and there’s nothing interesting at all about it. These shows were so dull in 1999 that it’s no wonder they died for all intents and purposes by the time Russo took over. Nothing to see here AT ALL.

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Halloween Havoc 1999
Date: October 24, 1999
Location: MGM Garden Arena, Las Vegas, Nevada
Attendance: 8,464
Commentators: Bobby Heenan, Tony Schiavone

This is the first show of the Russo Era in WCW. Therefore, the show is a total mess and the ending is as stupid as you could ask for. This should be an interesting experiment because we’re going to look at one of the last PPVs before Russo took over and the first one after he took over. Either way, I’m not expecting this to work all that well. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about the double main event: Goldberg vs. Sid and Sting vs. Hogan for the US and World Titles respectively. Shenanigans would ensue. Sting is something like a heel while Hogan is the face, of course.

Rey Mysterio is injured and can’t compete tonight. Therefore, Mysterio and Konnan are stripped of the titles so it’ll be a triple threat tag team hardcore match with Harlem Heat vs. Brian Knobbs/Hugh Morrus vs. Kidman/Konnan. You know, because we couldn’t just sub Kidman into the match in Rey’s place.

The announcers run down the card.

Cruiserweight Title: Disco Inferno vs. Lash Leroux

Disco is champion coming in. The massive demon holding the massive pumpkin is always cool to see for the set. It’s shaking here (intentionally) which makes it look even better. Disco takes over to start and Lash isn’t really able to fight back. The ring is really big looking by comparison to the modern WWE one. Out to the floor and Lash goes into the post. He finally gets something going with a combination belly to belly/powerslam for two.

Lash grabs a sleeper and this match is really nothing special. Disco sends him over the top but Lash hangs on. Disco gets the first shot in anyway but the Last Dance (Stunner) misses. A neckbreaker, a middle rope axe handle and a piledriver all get two for the champion. Lash grabs a blue thunder driver (his move according to Tony) for two. They botch…something involving a clothesline and the Last Dance keeps the title on Disco.

Rating: D. It’s passable but this probably belonged on Nitro more than anything else. They weren’t clicking at all and it was really hurting things. Lash wasn’t anything special but he got a lot better once they put him into the MIA. Disco was always around and had a much better career than he’s remembered for. Pretty sloppy match though.

Lash beats up Disco post match to LOUD booing.

Benoit and Malenko got here earlier and Saturn yelled at them. The two of them are quitting the Revolution.

Harlem Heat says they’ll get the titles back after they lost them on Monday.

Tag Titles: Konnan/Billy Kidman vs. Harlem Heat vs. Hugh Morrus/Brian Knobbs

Morrus/Knobbs are the First Family and are managed by Hart. This is under hardcore rules and there are two referees. Remember that. Kidman and Konnan have the belts and wear them out despite not being champions. They’re thieves apparently and have stolen Flair’s socks. The first shot of the match is Knobbs hitting Ray with a trashcan and the brawl begins.

Yep it’s a big mess. Booker throws Knobbs into the first row and the cameramen can’t keep up with everything. This is a case where split screen would be a good idea. The First Family screws up a bit and Morrus takes a trashcan shot. Jimmy gets caught in the ring and runs as Booker stalks him. Knobbs makes the save, pelting a trashcan at him. I don’t mind it as much when you can get the pin out there.

Knobbs is double teamed by the Heat who send him through a casket. Kidman is dropped on a chair as the Heat beat up Knobbs in the back. Scratch that as the Heat screw up and it’s table time back in the arena. Morrus hits his moonsault on Konnan through the table. We cut to the back to see Stevie hit Knobbs with a mummy and Booker gets the pin. 26 seconds later, Kidman pins Morrus (via something we totally miss) and we have a controversy. Not really, but it’s WCW so logic and the laws of time and space take a backseat to Russo’s brain.

Rating: F. This wasn’t wrestling. This was proof that the Hardcore matches in WWF had some logic and thinking behind them. Let that sink in for a few seconds. This was junk and the “controversy” was really stupid because there were two referees and Harlem Heat clearly got the pin far earlier. Kidman and Konnan would win the titles the next night, making this whole thing totally pointless.

The Flairs arrive and Ric has a crowbar.

Here’s DDP and my goodness Kimberly was hot. Page is a heel here and has been for awhile I think. Kimberly makes fun of Flair for being a 14 time spanker of her. I don’t like where this is going. Sex jokes are made and it’s Russo-Vision all over. Page runs down Vegas and talks about Kimberly pretending to seduce David Flair. More sex jokes and this is going nowhere. Page offers a strap match against Flair who he may or may not have had a match with already. Apparently they had one already. Depending on how you interpreted it, it could have meant Page wanted a handjob from Flair.

Goldberg is looking for Sid.

The Filthy Animals aren’t happy with Tenay asking about Konnan. Eddie has a stolen Rolex from Flair and implies he has a stolen phone.

Perry Saturn vs. Eddie Guerrero

This is Revolution vs. Filthy Animals. Eddie leaves the watch with Heenan because he doesn’t trust Tony. I have no idea who the faces and heels are here. Your usual fast paced start from these two with Eddie taking out Perry’s knee to send him to the floor. Tony asks Heenan who the leader of the Filthy Animals is. Heenan: “I think it’s Kidman, but it might be Konnan, but it’s probably Mysterio.” Tony: “I think it’s Eddie Guerrero.” Heenan: “I was just going to say that.”

The steps are used outside by Eddie but he gets sent into them according to wrestling law #1. Back in the ring Saturn takes over and works on the arm. Saturn busts out a bunch of freaky holds on the arm and then hits a t-bone for two. Now Saturn is working on the knee. Pick something dude. Eddie works the arm himself to really get the people into this. Heenan has slipped the watch into his pocket.

Perry does the British Bulldog/Shawn Michaels short arm scissors counter and hits a Lionsault for two. Brainbuster hits for Eddie but the Frog Splash misses. They go to the corner and Eddie gets crotched, allowing Saturn to hit a belly to belly superplex (kind of) for a very close two. The crowd doesn’t care but this has been a pretty good match. Saturn tries a Razor’s Edge from the top but Eddie rolls though and snaps off a superplex. And never mind because here’s Flair with the crowbar for the DQ. Russo strikes again.

Rating: C+. The middle part was really fun but the opening and ending sucked. The opening can be blamed on the two of them but the ending was all on the booker. There’s no reason at all to have this end in a DQ win for Eddie. Have that happen post match, not as the ending. Naturally though we can’t have a clean win, which I think played a lot into the Radicalz’s departure.

Kidman and Torrie can’t make a save so Flair kisses her. She looks GREAT here. Flair comes back and gets his watch.

Goldberg destroys Sid in the back and Sid is busted open but fine other than that.

Here’s Buff Bagwell to talk and he calls out Jeff Jarrett. Why? No idea but I guess they’re feuding. Here’s Jeff with the guitar but he drops it so the brawl can begin. Lex comes out for the save…and turns on Buff. Or was it by mistake? Why is this happening again? Something about Liz I think, but the announcers can’t just explain anything so it doesn’t matter.

Sid gets stitched up but throws the doctor out.

Eddie has a phone from somewhere and wants to know how Rey is. He tells Rey to get back here because they have business to take care of.

Brad Armstrong vs. Berlyn

Berlyn is Alex Wright as a crazy German kind of Neo-Nazi. Armstrong is a career jobber that wore an American jacket for awhile. Berlyn dominates to start so the fans chant USA. Big powerbomb puts Brad down as does a spinwheel kick. Things speed up a bit and Armstrong hits a cross body for two. We talk about the Filthy Animals because there’s no real point to this match. Then of course we make this stupider by having Berlyn go for his neckbreaker but Armstrong grabs the rope. Berlyn knocks himself out enough for Brad to get the pin.

Rating: F+. Here lies Berlyn. This ended any credibility that his character had and he would be back to Alex Wright in a few months. This was horribly stupid and was clearly meant for a shock instead of being an impressive win. Armstrong got treated like a jobber the entire time until the last bit. I see no point to that and it was stupid.

Flair says he slept with Kimberly and will sleep with Torrie. Oh and WOO a lot. He’s all fired up for this and tells the Animals to bring it on.

TV Title: Chris Benoit vs. Rick Steiner

Benoit is champion coming in. This is the main event of the last two Nitros I’ve done too. Steiner immediately stalls on the floor and catches Benoit when the Canadian chases him. Steiner Line and a suplex puts Benoit down for two. Benoit fights back and hits a superplex but Steiner no sells that too. A Crossface attempt is avoided and we head to the floor. Benoit hits a suicide dive and Steiner is up in seconds.

Steiner keeps stalling every time Benoit gets anything going. There’s a kick to the balls and Steiner takes over with a rest hold to the leg. Time for a chinlock because Steiner has already wrestled like 6 minutes. Steiner uses various boring power moves as Benoit sells like a master for him. The American hits two Germans on the Canadian for two. Make that three which is all Steiner seems to be able to do. It must run in the family.

A suplex is countered into a DDT by Benoit to finally give him a breather. Not that Steiner sells it or anything. A flying shoulder block and Steiner is up first again. Three Rolling Germans get two and Steiner won’t freaking stay down. There goes the referee and Steiner brings in a chair which goes into Steiner’s face but he throws it at Benoit during a Swan Dive attempt. Malenko comes in and turns on Benoit by hitting him with the chair. That’s enough for the pin and the title for Steiner.

Rating: D. Rick Steiner messes up almost every match he’s in. What can Benoit do when Steiner won’t stay down off ANYTHING Benoit hits him with? This is one of those great examples of why Benoit left. Why should he stick around here when he’s getting jobbed out to Sid for the US Title a few months earlier (Sid wouldn’t sell) and now to another washed up old guy who won’t sell? The TV Title would be around for a little over another month as Steiner would drop it to Scott Hall and Hall would literally throw the title away.

Malenko hugs Saturn in the aisle.

Bret says he has a bad leg but he’s going to fight tonight anyway.

Total Package vs. Bret Hart

Bret dominates to start and Luger can’t get anything going at all. As they fight to the floor for the second time, Liz trips Bret which doesn’t work at all. Lex finally takes over with more generic offense. These old guys really can’t do much but why should they? They’re making a fortune already. Bret grabs a Russian legsweep for two. Luger’s official name here is Lex Luger but you get the idea.

Bret keeps firing off and we hear about Goldberg and Sid some more. Here are the Five Moves of Doom by Hart and he loads up the Sharpshooter, but Lex pokes him in the eye. Someone tries a hiptoss and they tumble to the floor. Back in and Bret’s knee is almost done. Lex goes after the leg, works on it for about 10 seconds and hooks a half crab for the clean tap out. Yes, in 1999 Lex Luger got a clean submission win over Bret Hart.

Rating: D-. This match sucked and the only thing that keeps it from failing is how Liz looked in that dress with her implants. I can’t comprehend the booking of this show but believe me: it’s going to get worse. It’s not like Luger meant anything at this point, so let’s put him over Bret freaking Hart. Makes sense.

Goldberg points to the blood on the floor that came from Sid. That’s just a preview for later.

Here’s Madusa in a bikini to promote Nitro Perfume. She freaks out over it, pours the perfume on Bobby, curses a lot, and leaves. On PPV people. On PPV.

We recap Sting vs. Hogan which is this whole “who can you trust” stuff which was done forever in 95 and no one cared. This is a rematch from some show that they don’t bother telling us.

WCW World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Sting

And there’s no Hogan. The music plays for like two minutes and he’s not here. Here’s Sting, the champion, instead. Here’s Hogan’s music again and still no one comes out. He finally comes out in street clothes and yes, this is where they’re going. Hogan whispers in Sting’s ear and lays down. Bell, pin, bell, match over. Yes, they did this before Bash at the Beach 2000.

No mention of it after that (yet) and it’s on to the next match.

US Title: Sid Vicious vs. Goldberg

Sid is champion and is taped up from earlier in the night. Goldberg does his walk from the back with cops around him. The cops come into the arena which they never do, and the Outsiders jump Goldberg during the entrance. Sid jumps him in the aisle but Goldberg fights back and busts him open again. This is all on the floor so far. They’re in the ring now and it’s still a brawl. To be fair though that’s all it needs to be.

Off to a camel clutch by Sid and the fans chant for the bald one. Goldberg fights out of that and slams Sid for two. Sid is down on his knees and almost begging for mercy but he keep staring up at Goldberg. He’s up to his feet now but Goldberg just keeps pounding him down. Sid is a bloody mess. He keeps trying to fight but goes down almost every time. They’re really pushing Sid as a face here which I don’t think is the idea. Sid tries to walk and falls to his knees and it’s stopped. Goldberg wins the title.

Rating: D. Yes, that’s seriously the whole thing. This was built up almost since the beginning of the year and a six minute total domination by Goldberg is what we end it with. The Outsiders wound up being totally worthless as Goldberg shrugged the attack off and they just left. Nothing to see here, as will be common for Russo.

Sid is back up and Rick Steiner tries to hold him back. I really hope this was a Sid face turn because it came off like one. Sid starts to walk back to the ring after having the blood wiped away but ultimately he turns around and goes to the back. Yeah that was a face turn.

Goldberg would lose the title to Hart the next night.

We get a clip from Nitro of the Kimberly/Flair thing. It was supposed to be David but it wound up being Ric.

Sting is in the ring now and says he didn’t come here for a night off, so he issues an open challenge.

Ric Flair vs. Diamond Dallas Page

It’s a strap match but you just win by pin. Page tries to stall but only can do that so much with the strap aspect. Flair slugs him down in the corner and pulls him into the post shoulder first. They head back towards the entrance and into the crowd. They slug it out among the fans for a bit and we’re just killing time in this effort to be like ECW and WWF. Back to ringside and Flair kisses Kimberly.

Page hammers him down and Flair is busted of course. I don’t think they’ve been in the ring more than 30 seconds so far. Flair is thrown onto the table and takes a hard beating. We go into the ring for a change and Flair takes over. He whips Page like he stole something and chops away in the corner after tying Page up like a smart man. There’s the knee drop and Kimberly’s rocking rack is worried.

Flair starts in on the leg and ties the strap around Page’s throat. With Page almost choked out, Ric hooks in the Figure Four. That’s really pretty smart when you think about it. Page really isn’t all that good at selling this hold. Page grabs the rope and Flair pounds him down again. A low blow out of nowhere changes things and Page grabs a Diamond Cutter with the strap around Flair’s throat. I’m about 99% sure the ending is botched as Flair lifts his leg to put it on the rope but misses. The referee almost stopped but calls it a pin anyway.

Rating: C. Pretty fun fight but the ending (amazing isn’t it) messes things up again. Also, was there really a reason for this to be a strap match? If there was I certainly don’t know what it was. That being said, it was a decent match but that basically means if you have talented guys in there, you get a decent match.

Post match David tries a save but that fails as well with Page standing tall. Tony says he’s never heard Flair scream in pain. He’s been around 16 years right? Flair goes out on a stretcher. He’s being taken out with about 14 minutes to go in the show and the Sting challenge to go by the way. This isn’t going to end well is it? As Flair is taken to the ambulance, the Filthy Animals jump the medics and steal the ambulance with Flair in it. If my memory is right, this resulted in Flair being buried in the desert. I can’t wait to get to the crazy days of Nitro.

With 9 minutes to go, here’s Sting for the challenge.

WCW World Title: Sting vs. Goldberg

Yep, that’s what they’re doing. Pay no attention to the fact that this could have been HUGE on PPV if they did it right, because we need to SHOCK people right? He doesn’t even bring the US Title with him because it doesn’t mean anything by this point. When Goldberg gets in the ring, we have seven minutes left. Tony has no idea if this is for the title or not. And Sting goes to the floor before the match starts. Six minutes left and the bell hasn’t rung yet, nor do we have a referee. There’s a referee and the bell rings with 5:36 in the show.

All Goldberg to start and he hammers Sting down to the floor. Still no official word on if this is for the title or not. Sting goes into the barricade and we’re almost out of time. Sting takes him down back in the ring and hits a top rope splash for two. He tries to spear Goldberg and that just ticks him off but the real spear misses in the corner. There’s the Splash and a second one. Make it three and Bill goes down. And never mind as he pops up, hits the spear and Jackhammer for the title. The match barely lasted three minutes. Screw rating this nonsense as the title was vacated the next night.

The announcers are STUNNED that the title has changed. Sting hits the referee post match, which was the reason for the title being vacated after it was given back to Sting since this was unsanctioned. There was a tournament which ended at Mayhem with Bret winning the title.

Overall Rating: F. I really have no idea how to feel about this show. So much happened on it and the pace was so fast (kind of) that you didn’t really have the chance to process what was going on. There were swerves, stuff like Hogan (never mentioned again for the rest of the show) and the really strange finishes which made you realize how bad it was, but it never stops going. That being said, it sucked and there’s no other way to put it. The lack of finishes, the stupid angles and all the swerves made this show horrible. No good matches at all and the world title match (version one) alone makes this a full on failure.

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