Paragon Pro Wrestling
Date: September 5, 2015
Location: Sam’s Town Hotel & Gambling Hall, Las Vegas, Nevada
Commentators: Jeff Aikin, Todd Keneley

This is an indy company that has managed to get TV time by paying the station to air them. I have no idea of what to expect here and I’ve only heard of a handful of the roster so I’m basically going in blind. I can’t imagine this is going to be a full time thing but why not try it once? Let’s get to it.

The opening video makes this look decent for a low budget act.

The announcers run down the card, including a casket match.

Interviewer Pat Kelly brings out a guy named Hammerstone, a champion who looks a bit like a more muscular Shane Douglas from the early 90s, who is facing Wes Brisco later tonight. Hammerstone has seen Brisco having great matches week after week, but he wouldn’t be here without his famous name. One night thirty years from now, there will be a story of Hammerstone Jr. because he destroyed the legend of the Brisco family starting tonight.

Hammerstone vs. Wes Brisco

Non-title because Hammerstone is a Tag Team Champion. Hammerstone shoves him down a few times to start but Brisco comes back with a hiptoss and starts in on the arm. A running clothesline in the corner staggers Hammerstone (who I believe is the heel here) and Brisco puts on an armbar over the ropes. Hammerstone knocks him to the wooden floor (when do you ever see that?), followed by a fall away slam back inside. The wrestling here isn’t the most intense in the world.

We hit the reverse chinlock on Brisco for a bit before he fights up makes his comeback with every basic offensive move you can think of. Hammerstone is in trouble but here’s a guy named Chamberlain (partner I’m assuming) comes out to distract Brisco, allowing Hammerstone to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen far worse than this and they kept it basic. I’m assuming this sets up Brisco saying he can get a partner and win the titles to give us a title match and there’s nothing wrong with booking that way. Brisco didn’t do much for me in TNA but he looked acceptable here. That’s a good way of describing this match: acceptable, which is far better than the usual drek you can see on an indy show.

American Title: Ethan HD vs. Darin Corbin

Corbin is defending and billed from the Dude Ranch. I’m not sure if this is the top title in the company but it’s certainly billed as something important. Corbin elbows him in the face to start and stops for a dance, only to eat an elbow to his own face. A standing shooting star gets two on Corbin’s overly ample gut. Ethan gets tied up in the ropes for a shot to the chest, allowing Corbin to tell the fans that he’s naturally beautiful.

We get a Jimmy Del Ray name drop as Corbin loads up the Ginger Snap (looked like a McGillicutter) but Ethan counters into a headscissors into a Russian legsweep. A standing moonsault gets two and my goodness the announcers are underselling this stuff. Corbin gives us a terrible looking ref bump, immediately followed by Ethan kicking Darin in the head for no count. Back up and Corbin grabs a rollup and the trunks to retain at 6:04.

Rating: D. Corbin is called a dude and called himself beautiful and was played up as a hot tempered Irish guy at the same time. With all that, I’m still not sure what he’s supposed to be. It wasn’t much of a match either with both guys just doing moves to each other. Ethan wasn’t bad but he feels like half a dozen wrestlers I can think of off the top of my head.

Post match Ethan snaps and beats up two referees before destroying a bunch of stuff at ringside. Two other wrestlers run in and take chair shots to the ribs.

Kevin Kross, the walking definition of your stereotypical wrestler with short hair, tattoos and a good physique, is all intense and chilling. So he’s their Randy Orton. His nickname is the Toll Man because he’s coming to collect. Seriously? That’s the best you can come up with? He’s a guy who sits in a booth all day and takes someone’s money?

Kevin Kross vs. Mikey O’Shea

Mikey is a good sized guy and dressed almost exactly like Bam Bam Bigelow. Kross goes after him in the corner to start and sends the big guy into the post. Some choking on the ropes has Mikey in more trouble and Kross counts along with the referee. Off to a front chancery on Mikey and a swinging neckbreaker gets two. O’Shea slams him out of the corner but has to elbow out of a Saito suplex. A spinebuster gets two on Kevin but Mikey decides for a sunset flip, only to have Kevin sit down on it and grab the ropes for the pin at 4:33.

Rating: D+. Decent power brawl here with Kross clearly being groomed as a star. I’m still not wild on THE TOLL MAN but at least he won like he should have. Mikey came off like a big power guy who is always going to slip up at the end. Nothing special to see here but Kross is a name I’ve heard of before and he has the intangibles that you need.

We recap Tyshaun Prince vs. Gangrel, which is due to some eliminations in a battle royal. Tonight is the blowoff in a Pine Box (casket) match. The feud looks to have been going on for a few weeks so this is a big deal. Prince has a very stereotypical guy named the Cuban Assassin as his manager and is scared of coffins.

Tyshaun Prince vs. Gangrel

Prince is a huge guy with height and muscle. The Assassin says this match isn’t happening and they’re leaving this horrible place. This brings out Matt Striker, who is the interim commissioner. Striker says this match is happening or there will be fines and suspensions. Gangrel comes out to the awesome Brood music (well at least a rap version with the music in the background) and you have to get a pin or submission before putting your opponent in the coffin.

They circle each other for a bit as Gangrel is clearly the face here. That’s not what I was expecting but it works well enough. Gangrel looks better than he did fifteen years ago. Prince slowly pounds him down and the Assassin guarantees that Gangrel is going in the box. Some right hands stagger Prince and they stop to stare at each other for a bit. Prince sends him into the apron and drives a knee into the ribs to stop a comeback. A bearhug on the floor stays on the back and Prince bends Gangrel’s back around the post. Nice and simple.

Gangrel can’t hit the Impaler on the floor and Prince chokeslams him (he’s big, therefore he chokeslams) onto the ramp. Keneley: “That’s got to be like getting hit by a hot bat.” Huh? Anyway Prince misses a middle rope splash and the Impaler (just a regular DDT)….is pretty much no sold. The Assassin’s interference backfires and another Impaler gives Gangrel the pin at 8:13. So what was the point of the coffin?

Rating: C. That’s on a sliding scale. The match did feel like a big deal but the ending felt flat as it should have just been a regular casket match. Prince is someone who looks good but isn’t much more than a big power guy but he could be something with some polishing. Not a bad match though and it felt like something big, at least for this size of a company.

Assassin is put in the casket instead of Prince, making this whole thing pointless.

Overall Rating: C-. This was fine. A bit boring but fine. They did a mostly decent job of letting me know why I should watch the matches and some of their guys have potential. It helps that they had some known names in there to give the fans someone to care about. I doubt I’ll be watching this again but this was better than a lot of indies I’ve seen over the years.

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No word on why but I’d guess budget cuts.  I’ll keep you posted on any more names being released today.

World Cup of Wrestling
Date: December 7, 2013
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s another One Night Only show but at least this time there’s a fresh idea to it. See, this time instead of a tag tournament or a singles tournament, it’s an international tournament. It’s in the vein of the World X Cup if you remember that from WAY back in the day. It’s an interesting idea but I’m not sure if it’s going to be all that interesting. This is TNA so I can’t imagine it being so. Let’s get to it.

We open with the highlight reel of stuff we haven’t seen yet. The four teams are USA, United Kingdom, International and Aces and 8’s. It looks like there’s a singles guy, a tag team, an X-Division guy and a Knockout each.

JB explains the rules: There will be eight matches with the winners receiving one point apiece. The teams with the most points advance to an eight man elimination tag for the cup.

Here are the teams, in order of X-Division, Knockouts, tag team and singles.

United Kingdom – Rockstar Spud, Hannah Blossom, Rob Terry/Douglas Williams, Magnus

International – Sonjay Dutt, Lei’D Tapa, Petey Williams/Funaki, Judas Mesias (from AAA in Mexico)

USA – Kenny King, Mickie James, Bad Influence, James Storm

Aces and 8’s – Wes Brisco, ???, Doc/Knux, Mr. Anderson

The Aces and 8’s will introduce their Knockout later, even though she was already shown on the opening video. On paper the USA team should dominate this.

Video on Team UK with each member getting a mini profile. Basically it’s a British Boot Camp and British Invasion reunion.

Magnus says he’s motivated tonight and he’s standing up for what is right. Tonight, it’s right for him to go to work.

Mr. Anderson (Aces and 8’s) vs. Magnus (UK)

Anderson takes him into the corner to start and shakes his head at Magnus. The Brit shoves Anderson into another corner and slaps Anderson in the face as the match stays in first gear. They slug it out until Anderson’s cross body is caught in midair for a modified scoop brainbuster. Anderson goes up top and as Magnus comes over to stop him, gets his arm snapped over the top rope to put Magnus down.

Mr. goes after the arm and bars it on the mat for a bit. A shoulder block gets a pair of near falls on Magnus and he gets whipped hard into the corner. Off to a hammerlock into a slam down onto the arm for two. Back to the armbar as Anderson is in full control. Tazz talks about Magnus being a metrosexual for some reason as the Brit charges into a boot in the corner. A double clothesline puts both guys down but it’s Anderson up first, stomping Magnus down in the corner.

Magnus’ arm is slammed onto the apron but he comes back with a knee to the face and a clothesline with the good arm. The top rope elbow gets two but Anderson comes back with a hot shot for no cover. Mic Check is countered and Magnus hits that Michinoku Driver of his for the pin and the first point.

Rating: C. Basic match here but it was a nice win for Magnus. The arm work was a decent enough story for the match, even though it didn’t play into the ending at all. The match didn’t have much heat but at least Magnus got a clean pin, which is what a glorified jobber to the stars like Anderson is good for.

UK – 1 (3 matches remaining)

USA – 0 (4 matches remaining)

International – 0 (4 matches remaining)

Aces and 8’s – 0 (3 matches remaining)

Video on Team USA in the same style as earlier with everyone getting a quick profile.

Kenny King (USA) vs. Sonjay Dutt (International)

King takes him into the corner to start and talks a lot of trash. The fans are behind King here even though he’s a heel at the moment. You have to love good old fashioned xenophobia. King takes him down with a headlock but Dutt counters into one of his own. Off to an armbar for a bit before Dutt sends him to the floor for a big flip dive. Back in with King dropkicking Dutt off the top as Tazz talks about moving Team International’s headquarters in a joke that goes on WAY too long.

King hooks a chinlock but Dutt fights up and puts on an octopus hold of all things. It looks good but doesn’t last long as King flips him over and gets two off some right hands. Back to the chinlock from King as Tazz keeps talking about Scandinavia for some reason. Dutt jawbreaks his way out of the hold and drops King with a jumping elbow to the jaw. A tornado DDT gets two on King and a slingshot splash gets the same.

The fans chant USA as you would expect them to do as King breaks up Sliced Bread #2. King catches a cross body in a spinning Irish Curse backbreaker for two. Dutt’s throat is snapped across the top rope and a springboard kick to the face gets two. King tries a reverse AA but Dutt flips out and rolls him up for two. A standing Sliced Bread #2 looks to set up Dutt’s moonsault double stomp but King rolls away and hits a running knee to the chest for the pin.

Rating: C+. Cut two minutes or so out of this and it’s much better. This was a much more fast paced match as you would expect but it dragged a bit in the middle. The current state of the X-Division continues to make me shake my head as the title is never defended and guys like these two never make it to TV at all. Such a shame.

USA – 1 (3 matches remaining)

UK – 1 (3 matches remaining)

International – 0 (3 matches remaining)

Aces and 8’s – 0 (3 matches remaining)

Team International says they’re going to turn things around. Well Funaki says he’s #1 but you get the idea.

Hannah Blossom (UK vs. Lei’D Tapa (International)

Blossom is a normal sized girl so this is power vs. speed. Tapa shoves her around to start and drives Blossom into the corner as Tenay and Tazz have one of their TOTALLY NATURAL moments of banter. Hannah gets an awkward looking cross body for two but gets kicked in the face to get us back to the natural order of things. Tapa slams her down as Tazz gets a text from Judas Mesias, saying where the party is when Team International wins. Blossom gets caught in a chinlock but fights up with some clotheslines to no effect. A high cross body gets two for Hannah but gets caught in the fireman’s carry Stunner for the pin for Tapa.

Rating: D. This was a glorified squash which makes sense given who was in there but it doesn’t make the match any more interesting. Even worse though was the commentary as they were practically going out of their way to be annoying and unfunny. I don’t know if someone is telling them what to say but good grief I’d hope they’re not this naturally irritating.

International – 1 (2 matches remaining)

USA – 1 (3 matches remaining)

UK – 1 (2 matches remaining)

Aces and 8’s – 0 (3 matches remaining)

Tazz declares the leader board to be lazy for reasons of general stupidity.

Aces and 8’s say they’re taking over the world tonight. Their Knockout is Ivelisse from Gut Check.

Video on Aces and 8’s which is a recap of the team’s history instead of profiles.

Doc/Knux (Aces and 8’s) vs. Funaki/Petey Williams (International)

Funaki gets thrown into the corner and stomped down during the entrances to give the bikers an early advantage. Doc gets things going against Funaki and the dominance begins quickly. Funaki is dragged into the heel corner and it’s off to Knux for some clubbing forearms and more double stomping. Some right hands have no effect on Knux but Funaki keeps swinging and actually staggers Doc. The bikers easily break up the tag attempt though with Doc taking Funkai down to the mat in a leg lock.

The slow beating continues and there’s not much to talk about here. It’s the same power offense over and over again on Funaki as we’re over five minutes into this. Funaki’s sunset flip is easily blocked but Knux sits on the mat instead of Funaki’s chest. The hot tag is broken up again though as the beatdown continues. Knux puts on a front facelock and we get the unseen tag for old times’ sake. Funaki stops a charging Doc with a boot in the corner but his tornado DDT is broken up.

An enziguri is FINALLY enough for the hot tag to Williams as things speed up. Petey headscissors Knux into 619 position and dropkicks him in the back as everything breaks down. A running DDT gets two on Knux and Petey low bridges Doc to the floor. Funaki gets two on Doc off a cross body but Knux comes back in with a hammer shot to Funaki for the pin.

Rating: D. This was REALLY boring as it ran nearly fifteen minutes with about twelve of those being spent on a long Funaki heat segment. It doesn’t help that the small guys have never teamed together that I know of and are facing a regular team. Nothing to see here and WAY too long on top of that.

Aces and 8’s – 1 (2 matches remaining)

International – 1 (1 match remaining)

UK – 1 (2 matches remaining)

USA – 1 (3 matches remaining)

Video on Rockstar Spud, including an endorsement from Hogan.

Wes Brisco (Aces and 8’s) vs. Rockstar Spud (UK)

Brisco pie faces Spud to start and the far smaller guy gets right in Wes’ face. Spud is a face here despite being a heel by the time this aired. Wes easily takes him down and puts on a chinlock before hitting a hard clothesline for two. Spud comes back with a dropkick and some right hands in the corner, only to be dumped out to the floor. Back in and we hit a chinlock as Tazz calls him Rockspar Stud.

A neckbreaker gets two on Spud and it’s off to a cravate. That’s too British for Brisco so it’s back to the good old American chinlock. Spud fights out and dropkicks Brisco out to the floor to set up a big flip dive over the top. The fans are actually behind Spud as he gets two off a high cross body. Brisco just shakes it off and powerslams Spud for the pin.

Rating: C-. Basic match here but at least it was a bit shorter than the other ones we’ve sat through so far. Brisco is a guy with some talent but he was stuck paling around with Bischoff for so long. Spud is far better as a heel who annoys everyone and his in ring stuff is only ok at best.

Aces and 8’s – 2 (1 match remaining)

International – 1 (1 match remaining)

UK – 1 (1 match remaining)

USA – 1 (3 matches remaining)

Bad Influence talks about great Americans, like George Washington, Ben Franklin, Thomas Jefferson and George Jefferson. “It took a lot of strength and work for him and Weezie to move up to the east side.” Tonight they’ll cement their names in American history with other greats like Martin Luther King Jr., Abraham Lincoln and Spider-Man. Daniels even sings a little America the Beautiful. He says he’s sexually delicious like a bowl of Horny Charms and you have permission to worship them. Absolutely hilarious stuff and the fact that So Cal Val looked great in a low cut blue blouse helped quite a bit.

Bad Influence (USA) vs. British Invasion (UK)

It’s Terry and Williams for the Brits here. Bad Influence is WAY over as a face team here which is bizarre to see but fits perfectly well. Terry starts with Kaz and the smaller guy climbs the corner to escape a headlock. The power is a bit too much for Kaz so he rolls (completely unnecessary, making it all the more appropriate) to the corner for the tag to Daniels. Christopher doesn’t want him either but comes in to bounce off Terry a few times.

Williams comes in with some clotheslines and a freaky looking double arm hold (Daniels’ arms were wrapped around Williams’ legs) into a rollup for two. Back to Terry vs. Kaz as Rob cranks on the arm. Daniels and Williams quickly come back in with Chris being armbarred down like it’s nothing. Bad Influence finally cheats a bit, allowing Daniels to STO Williams down to take over.

Kaz comes in with a clothesline for two and we hit the chinlock. Daniels comes in behind the referee’s back as the dynamic of the match gets even more and more confusing. Williams tries to fight out of the corner with forearms but walks into a Daniels clothesline to put him back down. Daniels kicks away at Douglas and puts on a chinlock to slow things down. Williams comes back with a jumping elbow to the jaw for two and there’s the hot tag to Terry.

A double clothesline puts Bad Influence down and we get a double belly to back suplex of all things. That looked awesome. Terry hits a tilt-a-whirl powerslam on Kaz to set up a top rope knee drop from Williams but Daniels makes the save. A top rope European uppercut puts Kaz down but Daniels breaks up the Rolling Chaos theory. Bad Influence gets in a quick High/Low for the pin on Williams for the point.

Rating: C+. This was probably the best match of the night so far but the face/heel dynamic hurt it a lot. Bad Influence was over because of the USA idea but the Brits were wrestling as faces. It doesn’t help that Williams hasn’t been seen in forever and Terry had been a heel other than a quick face run against Robbie E which may or may not have even happened when this was taped.

USA – 2 (2 matches remaining)

Aces and 8’s – 2 (1 match remaining)

International – 1 (1 match remaining)

UK – 1 (0 matches remaining)

The Brits are officially eliminated.

Video on Mickie James, including something about her country music push as a heel.

Mickie James (USA) vs. Ivelisse (Aces and 8’s)

To say Ivelisse looks hot as the biker in leather is the understatement of the night. How in the world does she not have a job? They circle each other to start until Mickie grabs the arm and takes Ivelisse down. Ivelisse is sent into the ropes for a breather as Taz starts to sing for no apparent reason. James hooks a headlock and Ivelisse bails to the floor. Back in and Ivelisse takes Mickie down and pounds away for two.

Mickie gets choked on the ropes but escapes from a wristlock to dropkick Ivelisse down for two. James pounds away in the corner but gets sent shoulder first into the post. Ivelisse gets a VERY delayed two count and a backbreaker gets the same. The kickouts are frustrating Ivelisse so she hooks a chinlock. James fights up and scores with some clotheslines followed by a neckbreaker for two. Mickie goes up top but here are the Aces to shove her off, giving Ivelisse the easy pin.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing special but there is no reason why Ivelisse doesn’t have a job in TNA. She looks great, she has some MMA style to her and she would be a nice breath of air to a division that hasn’t had a new face in a long time. Mickie was her usual self here even though she’s gone soon.

Aces and 8’s – 3 (0 matches remaining)

USA – 2 (1 match remaining)

International – 1 (1 match remaining)

UK – 1 (0 matches remaining)

Now, to prove how little thought TNA puts into these things, here’s the Ultimate X match that determined the winner of the World X Cup from the summer of 2008.

Ultimate X: Kaz (America) vs. Volador Jr. (Mexico) vs. Naruki Doi (Japan) vs. Daivari (International)

 

This is for four points apparently, so more or less the winner wins everything, making the entire previous three rounds totally pointless. Daivari is allegedly predictable in this. Ok then. West thinks Kaz is the favorite because of his experience letting him know that he’ll know how to win earlier. YOU CLIMB UP AND GRAB THE FREAKING X! How hard is this?

 

Daivari wisely goes after Kaz’s arm. That makes the most sense here if nothing else. Oh and only Kaz is a face here. We can’t have nice foreigners! West says Kaz is close to being a world champion. Oh the comedy! Oh and also, great idea on telling us to stop watching your show so we can go get our computers to vote on something on the show later on. In other words, a stipulation for later on in the night is more important than the match you’re watching at the moment. Volador is pretty fun to watch. Kaz manages to get above the X and almost unhooks it but Daivari makes the save.

 

It worked as it’s not like Kaz had a long time up there like in a ladder match so it didn’t look completely ridiculous which is a very nice difference. Also he used his legs to get there so he kept selling the arm from earlier. In a MIND BLOWING spot, Daivari is going across a cable with his back facing the ring so he’s looking up at the ceiling. Kaz climbs up to the metal thing that holds up the cables and JUMPS off of it, crashing down with a clothesline onto Daivari and killing himself in the process. That was INCREDIBLE. It also lets Volador go up and get the X for the win and the Cup.

 

Rating: B. This was another great high impact battle that worked perfectly for what it was supposed to do. I wasn’t sure who was going to win and I was thinking it would have been Team TNA but a surprise is always good. This was your usual crazy spotfest but it worked quite well.

Now that the time filler is over, back to modern times.

James Storm likes the idea of his team depending on him and mentions Ricky Morton for some reason.

Mesias (International) vs. James Storm (USA)

This should be interesting. Mesias punches Storm into the corner to start but James comes back with right hands of his own. They head outside for more punching with Mesias being whipped into the barricade. Storm rams him into various other metal objects until they head back inside for a Mesias powerslam. A clothesline in the corner staggers Storm as we actually talk about Mesias being in TNA before.

Storm’s comeback is stopped by a pull of the hair but he grabs a quick Russian legsweep to get a breather. An atomic drop and bulldog drop Mesias and there’s the enziguri in the corner for two. Mesias hits a quick Downward Spiral for two and a clothesline gets the same. The frustration sets in for Mesias and Storm makes it worse by winning a slugout. Mesias jumps over Storm in the corner but turns into the Last Call for the pin and the spot in the elimination match for USA.

Rating: C-. Sluggish match here but there’s something awesome about winning a match with a superkick. Mesias is someone I’d like to see come back to a major American company but he seems content to just do his thing in Mexico. At least Storm gets a big win in the clutch for once.

Final standings:

USA – 3

Aces and 8’s – 3

UK – 1

International – 1

We recap the matches so far tonight.

Team USA vs. Aces and 8’s

James Storm, Kenny King, Bad Influence, Mickie James

Mr. Anderson, Wes Brisco, Doc, Knux, Ivelisse

Elimination rules and even the girls are in this one. Mickie and Ivelisse get things going but Ivelisse tags in Doc instead of fighting. Doc gets a slap instead of a kiss and it’s off to Daniels. Chris gets caught in the corner but scores with a back elbow before bringing in Kaz for some good old American double teaming. Kaz tags out to King who doesn’t do as well, getting caught in a full nelson, allowing for some shots by Anderson. Kenny gets a quick two off a clothesline before it’s back to Kaz for some forearms.

Anderson gets in a knee to the ribs and it’s off to Brisco who is taken into the American corner. I say American even though everyone in the match is American (Ivelisse is from Puerto Rico which is part of America). Bad Influence double teams Brisco in the corner and the other three partners come in for five straight splashes in the corner. Aces and 8’s just let this happen and a double suplex from Bad Influence gets a two count.

Off to King who puts Wes in a chinlock and a back elbow to the jaw for two. A jawbreaker sends Brisco to the apron but he counters a suplex into a cross body with Ivelisse holding Kenny’s leg for the pin. Daniels comes in for some hip thrusting, prompting Taz to ask why Bad Influence likes having sex with the air. Storm comes in and pounds away before it’s back to Kaz for a spinning springboard legdrop for two.

Brisco gets a knee up in the corner to stop a charging Daniels and tags in Ivelisse for some reason. Mickie pulls her in and beats on Ivelisse like she stole something. The beating continues until Mickie misses a charge into the post, only to come back with a clothesline. A top rope Thesz perss eliminates Ivelisse but Brisco comes in with a quick rollup to eliminate Mickie. Storm comes in just as fast and Backstabs Brisco for the pin.

We’re down to Storm/Bad Influence vs. Anderson/Doc/Knux and it’s Storm vs. Knux in the ring. The bikers get Storm into the corner for some triple teaming before Doc comes in and pounds away. James fights out of the corner and makes the tag off to Kaz, who catches Knux coming in with a dropkick. A slingshot DDT puts Knux down and Daniels’ BME is enough for the pin.

It’s Doc in next and the Americans speed things up with some double teaming in the corner. Kaz dropkicks Doc but can’t put him down, only to get caught by a big uppercut. Off to Anderson who puts on an armbar as a transitional move, which is a big reason why limb psychology is dying. A neckbreaker drops Kaz for two but he gets a boot up in the corner to stop a charging Anderson. Both guys hit cross bodies at the same time and we get a breather.

The double tag brings in Storm and Doc as everything breaks down. Daniels holds Anderson’s arms but Storm accidentally hits Chris in the face. That’s enough being nice for Bad Influence and they walk out, leaving Storm two on one. Anderson drops some knees into Storm’s back for two and it’s back to Doc for more powerful right hands. We hit the chinlock again but James fights up with some right hands to the ribs. The Aces try some double teaming but Storm sends them together and rolls Anderson up for the pin. Last Call takes Doc’s head off and Storm wins for the good old USA.

Rating: B-. This was good stuff and Bad Influence steals yet another match. The eliminations made sense here and made Storm look good to close things out. He’s a guy who needs that kind of a push more than anyone else so having him win again here is certainly a good thing.

Bad Influence comes out to celebrate and get beaten up as well. Dude Daniels pinned Knux. Show some gratitude already. Storm and James get the cup to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. I liked this way more than I expected to. Now of course there are some issues with it (old match, continuity being thrown out the window), but at the end of the day this is a fifteen dollar special and shouldn’t be held to the same standards as a major PPV. The idea for the show was a good one as well and felt like something of interest rather than just something they threw together. If you can ignore some of the flaws and just get into the competition and matches, you’ll have a good time with this. It’s pretty easily the best One Night Only to date.

Results

Magnus b. Mr. Anderson – Michinoku Driver

Kenny King b. Sonjay Dutt – Running knee to the chest

Lei’D Tapa b. Hannah Blossom – Fireman’s carry into a Stunner

Doc/Knux b. Funaki/Sonjay Dutt – Hammer shot to Funaki

Wes Brisco b. Rockstar Spud – Powerslam

Bad Influence b. British Invasion – High/Low to Williams

Ivelisse b. Mickie James – Pin after Wes Brisco shoved James off the top

James Storm b. Mesias – Last Call

Team USA b. Aces and 8’s – Superkick to Doc

 

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Impact Wrestling
Date: September 26, 2013
Location: Verizon Arena, Little Rock, Arkansas
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

We’re less than a month away from the biggest show of the year and somehow the top heel is Dixie Carter. Bully Ray is busy with the rejects known as Aces and 8’s while AJ Styles is being called Mr. Marginal by a woman famous for having a husband named Surge and tweeting a lot. But remember, everything is FINE in this company. Let’s get to it.

We open with the usual recap of last week’s events.

Dixie Carter arrives and blows Sting off, basically telling him to stay out of her business.

Here are Bully and Brooke to get things going. Bully says it’s not easy to take the words out of his mouth but Dixie did it last week. He’s been up every night wondering how he can beat AJ Styles since AJ won the Series. Now it doesn’t matter though as Dixie is inside AJ’s head. AJ should be kissing the ground Dixie walks on for making him phenomenal. Ray stops to ask if we know who he is and here are the remaining Aces and 8’s.

Knux does the talking and says the same thing he said last week: Ray needs to stop thinking about his ho and start thinking about his bros. Ray says he’s the president and the rest of their patches should just say lackey. They need to fall in line and remember what he did to the former members of this club. Tonight it’s Main Event Mafia vs. the three of them and if an Ace loses, they’re out of the club.

Joseph Park is shaving while singing Sweet Caroline when Eric Young and ODB come in. Eric says Park needs to use a safety razor to prevent the civilians in the back.

Bro Mans/Gail Kim vs. ODB/Eric Young/Joseph Park

This is a result of Robbie getting beaten by both Young and Park in a combined 12 seconds last week. The girls start but it’s off to Robbie vs. Joseph before there’s any contact. Robbie can’t slam Joseph so Park slams him down for one instead. Jesse and Gail slow Joseph down before the Mans send him into the buckle. Jesse hits a good looking dropkick and avoids a seated senton from the big man. Robbie’s middle rope elbow gets two but Park comes back with something resembling a Samoan drop.

The referee misses the hot tag to Eric and it’s Gail in to get in some cheap shots. Back to the guys who are clotheslined down by Joseph, allowing for the hot tag to Eric for some house cleaning. Everything breaks down and ODB sends Gail to the ramp. Robbie pulls back to hit ODB so she shoves his face into her chest. Eric hits a Death Valley Driver on Jesse, setting up a middle rope splash from Park, a top rope elbow from Eric and a splash from ODB for the pin at 6:26.

Rating: D. WAY too long here for the story they were telling as there was nothing going on out there. Park cleaned house, Park got beaten down, Park made the hot tag, ODB breast joke, pin. Somehow that took nearly seven minutes to get through. I’m over the in your face comedy stuff with ODB, Park and Young but they’re clearly not going anywhere.

Austin Aries says he’ll explain his future plans in the ring.

Hulk Hogan says he’ll fix everything.

Here’s Aries with something to say. He says it was just a year ago when he was headlining Bound For Glory and even though he’s not doing that this year, he’s still the main eventer. This brings out…..Kenny King? Kenny says he’s tired of hearing everything Aries is talking about when it was Kenny King making headlines last year when he became X-Division Champion. Then the headlines changed to King being ripped off by Frail Sabin. He was ready to get his belt back but then someone got in the Manik costume and stole the X-Division Title.

That would be Austin Aries, who hasn’t been the future or Generation Next (ROH reference) in about ten years. Now it’s Kenny King’s time but Aries cuts to the chase by saying he’s ready right now. King says that just like Hilary Clinton says before she takes her clothes off, “you don’t want none of this”, before decking Aries. Austin fights him off and says let’s do it right now so here’s a referee. Aries doesn’t wait and dives at King on the ramp to start the match after a break.

Austin Aries vs. Kenny King

Back with Aries pounding away on the floor before heading back inside, only to be taken down by a leg drop and caught with a jumping elbow in the corner. King is busted open BAD, likely off something on the floor. Aries comes back with chops and an atomic drop before rolling over King’s back to set up a release STO. The pendulum elbow but King spins out of the brainbuster. Aries loads up the 450 but King comes back with a super Tazplex for two. Austin shrugs it off and hits the running dropkick and the brainbuster for the pin at 5:00.

Rating: C. This was fine with both guys getting to show off a bit out there. I’m getting curious as to what Aries is going to do at the PPV as he really doesn’t have anything going on right now, though that could be said about a lot of big names. King could be worth something in the X-Division if there was enough competition to fight him.

Lei’D Tapa is coming. It still should have been Ivelisse.

Chris Sabin brags to Austin Aries about being greater than the greatest man that ever lived. Velvet still looks uncomfortable. Sabin and Velvet leaves and Aries says he’d like to test Sabin’s theory.

We recap the end of Ray/Aces and 8’s from earlier.

The Mafia is getting ready but Magnus is frustrated by EGO. Sting tells him to calm down and focus on the bikers tonight.

We get a quick recap of AJ vs. Dixie from last week.

Here’s Hogan to make everything better while also taking a bunch of money and not really improving anything. Hogan talks about being here for about four years now and being GM, meaning he’s in charge of the day to day operations of this show. You never air your dirty laundry in public, and that’s what’s happening with Dixie and AJ. The fans seem to think AJ Styles should stick around and Hogan wants AJ out here to hear that himself. No one comes out so Hogan says we’ll do this later.

Kurt Angle is back at BFG.

Someone named ETHAN is coming.

X-Division Title: Manik vs. Chris Sabin

Manik is defending and gets a quick two off a cross body. Sabin jumps over him in the corner but goes down grabbing his knee. Sabin limps around the ring and leans on Velvet for help, allowing Manik to become the stupidest man in wrestling by falling for it. The distraction lets Sabin pop up to the apron and kick Manik in the face to take over. Back in and Manik jumps over Sabin in the corner before putting on something like a Sharpshooter’s mentally disabled cousin.

A middle rope missile dropkick staggers Chris before Manik busts out kicking combination #6 and a standing flip attack gets two. Velvet’s distraction lets Chris get two off a rollup but Manik catapults Chris into the corner. Back to the same leg lock from earlier from the champion but Chris reaches out for the ropes, only to grab Velvet’s hands. He drags her inside but the distraction lets Manik counter a rollup into a pinning combination for the pin at 5:43.

Rating: C+. I just don’t get the appeal of Manik. He’s fine in the ring and does some nice stuff but I don’t get his popularity. The leg stuff was smart here and it furthered Sabin’s heel turn, but the match wasn’t much better than average. Also, wasn’t Jeff Hardy involved in this feud?

Sabin pounds on Manik until Aries makes the save. Velvet looks shocked at what Chris was doing.

Garrett Bischoff tells Aces and 8’s to keep it together. Knux is ready to go.

Kurt Angle is still back at BFG. That hasn’t changed in the last 20 minutes. Here’s the same video in case you were confused though.

EGO thinks they should be in the Hall of Fame and suggest they should make sure Magnus loses again tonight. Bad Intentions laughs maniacally but Roode just stares at them, refusing to join in. Daniels: “That’s how villains laugh. Come on Bobby.” Roode walks away. Funny stuff.

Main Event Mafia vs. Aces and 8’s

If the Aces lose, whomever loses the fall is gone. Magnus pounds away on Knux to start but Garrett comes in to be suplexed. Knux and Brisco immediately dive in for the save and everything breaks down. Cue EGO to beat up Magnus who is left holding his knee as, making it 3-2 for the time being.

Back with Sting still in trouble and Magnus not on the apron. Knux chokes on Sting a bit and it’s off to Brisco for a chinlock. Sting finally fights up and dropkicks Wes down and there’s the hot tag to Joe as the Aces are all taken down. The backsplash gets two on Brisco and everything breaks down. The Stinger Splash crushes the bikers and there’s the Clutch on Brisco for the submission at 10:07.

Rating: C. The match was ok but it illustrates the problem with the remaining bikers: even with an advantage they were trampled by a pair of former world champions. Why would anyone care if Brisco is gone? He’s done nothing at all and is just another lackey. The match was fine but the conclusion was never in doubt other than which Ace took the fall.

Post match Ray comes out and demands Wes’ cut but he won’t give it up. The fans chant NO, so Bully orders Garrett and Knux to take the cut off of Wes. They hesitate so Ray yells at them and lays out Wes himself with a clothesline and a piledriver. They’re told to take the cut off again or Ray will piledriver Brisco a second time. Knux and Bischoff begrudgingly do what Ray says. Bischoff holds the cut out to Ray but Bully wants Knux to hand it to him. Ray tells Knux to not let the people get in his head before handing him the cut. Knux and Bischoff pick up Brisco….and we need to watch Hogan walking in the back.

Hogan is in the ring to call out AJ with his double theme music. Hogan has a long term contract for AJ to sign but AJ doesn’t look happy. He picks up the pen and finally signs, saying he’s TNA’s. This brings out an overly smiley Dixie Carter who talks about why she signed Hulk. He was brought in to open doors and that’s exactly what he did. She’s very grateful but Hogan is just an employee. Dixie makes fun of AJ Styles’ accent and rips up the contract, telling AJ can get out of his ring.

AJ leaves so Dixie goes on a rant about how no one knows how tough she has it. She knows how tough it is because she’s in the 1% of people that get to make decisions like she does. Yes, they’re seriously going with this story. Hogan now has a week to fall in line and join Team Dixie or else.

Overall Rating: C. I liked the show for the most part tonight as the middle of the BFG card is starting to come into focus. The elimination of an Ace is always a good thing as they’ve been around for about a year too long at this point. The Dixie/AJ/Hogan stuff makes me roll my eyes but at this point it’s hard to complain about anything not named Aces and 8’s. Decent, but not great show this week.

Results

ODB/Eric Young/Joseph Park b. Bro Mans/Gail Kim – Splash to Jesse

Austin Aries b. Kenny King – Brainbuster

Manik b. Chris Sabin – Rollup

Main Event Mafia b. Aces and 8’s – Koquina Clutch to Brisco

 

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