Wrestler of the Day – September 24: Brie Bella

Today is Brie Bella. Let’s get this over with.

This is going to be about Brie, not about the Bella Twins. Well at least in regular tag matches.

The Bellas got hired in September 2007 and were sent to FCW. After about a year in developmental, Brie would debut on Smackdown on August 29, 2008.

Victoria vs. Brie Bella

The best part of this: Taz and JR hype up Classics on Demand with FORTY hours of content a month just eight bucks. Victoria grabs a headlock to start and sends Brie into the corner, only to get taken down by some fling snapmares. A backbreaker gets two on Brie and the standing moonsault gets the same but Victoria stops to talk a lot of trash. She can back it up though as a kick to the ribs puts Brie on the floor. Back in and Brie grabs a small package for the pin out of nowhere.

Here’s a classic from ECW on SyFy on March 30, 2009.

Nikki Bella vs. Brie Bella

Nikki comes out with Miz and Morrison but Brie counters with Carlito and Primo. Brie grabs a quick rollup for two before just hammering away at her sister’s face. Some armdrags put Nikki down but she grabs a quick suplex for two. Brie hooks a bulldog but the tag teams get in a brawl, allowing Nikki to roll up Brie for the pin.

Rating: D. Somehow this is going to be even worse when we get the big showdown in a few months. The girls just aren’t that good in the ring and it really shows in these matches. Nikki and Brie try out there but they seem to take things way more seriously than they should and it drags everything down. Just be good looking women and shake your hips.

To Superstars on July 16, 2009.

Brie Bella vs. Katie Lea

A quick rollup gets two for Brie and a snapmare puts Katie down. Katie comes right back with a backbreaker for two and a dropkick to the back. Brie gets back up and they slug it out with Brie taking over, only to get kicked to the floor. Twin Magic lets Nikki grab a rollup for the pin.

We’ll jump ahead to Brie being a pro on NXT, October 26, 2010.

Brie Bella vs. AJ

The Bellas have split up and aren’t living together anymore. Oh hey Primo is here again. I forgot he existed. Big clothesline by Brie gets two. I know I’m in the minority here but the Bellas are gorgeous and this is no exception. AJ gets two feet up to block a charge so Brie hits the floor. Nikki gets on her and Primo says DON’T DO IT! AJ gets a half rear naked choke (what kind of a name is that anyway?) half sleeper which gets her nowhere. AJ is all aggressive here but not in a heel style. Nikki pulls Brie out when the referee isn’t looking and a bad looking X Factor ends it for Nikki in a little over 4:00.

Rating: C-. This was a bit better than the first with an actual angle is involved here so that always tends to help. AJ was impressive here but I guess she’s not supposed to beat the Pros here. This wasn’t much here but it could have been far worse. It’s so interesting to see Brie as the star instead of the future huge star in AJ.

Time for a mixed tag on Raw, December 6, 2010.

Ted DiBiase/Maryse vs. Daniel Bryan/Brie Bella

Before the match we see Daniel Bryan coming out of a locker room with Brie Bella. Nikki comes up and seems rather jealous. I’m liking where this is going. The guys start us off and here comes Nikki. The Bellas are looking very good tonight in red. Punk says he’s seeing double. There’s a Foreigner song in there somewhere. Bryan beats on Ted for a few seconds before the girls come in. Maryse gets beaten on for a bit. Ted comes in for the save and it’s a big brawl a minute and a half in. There’s the Twin Magic and Nikki rolls up Maryse for the pin at 2:12.

Another Raw from April 11, 2011.

Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Brie Bella

Brie allegedly won a Divas battle royal to win this shot. Wasn’t that weeks ago and she got the shot already? Eve brings a marker to have an X put on Nikki’s hand so we know she’s on the floor. That’s rather intelligent. Brie takes her down to start but Eve makes her comeback with a dropkick and the standing moonsault for two. Eve gets her in the Tree of Woe and when she’s being taken off there’s a switch. While Nikki is being taken out Brie sneaks up on her and an X-Factor gives Brie the title at 2:20. Weak match but all the girls looked good from a looks perspective at least.

Time for a PPV title match at Over the Limit 2011.

Divas Title: Brie Bella vs. Kelly Kelly

Cole even says this will be boring. This is about what you would expect: both girls do a few things, neither really are that good, both look good in tiny shorts, which is why they have their jobs I suppose. LONG armbar by Brie wastes some time. Theres Twin Magic, XFactor, Nikki gets the pin to give Brie the title.

Rating: F. Dang it why did this have to be long enough to grade? The match was awful the whole way through as they have no business being on PPV. Watching Nunzio as the referee and the girls looking good are the only high spots here. Also, no sign of Kharma. How in the world can you validate this being on PPV? I give up.

A rematch on Raw, August 29, 100.

Kelly Kelly vs. Brie Bella

Oh joy, it’s this match again. Kelly hammers away to start and we cut to Beth and Natalya complaining about someone else that are causing the problems. They should be in the ring, not Kelly. The twins switch places and Nikki gets the pin with an X-Factor at 1:18.

We need gimmicks! From the live Holiday Special Smackdown on November 29, 2011.

Alicia Fox vs. Brie Bella vs. Nikki Bella vs. Natalya vs. Kaitlyn vs. AJ vs. Tamina vs. Aksana

This is a mistletoe on a pole match, which means you have to climb up and get the mistletoe. The winner gets something they can cash in before Christmas. Brie wins at 57 seconds after climbing on Nikki. I have no idea if I got all the competitors or not, not do I care.

The Bellas would leave WWE for about a year and do pretty much nothing in their time away. Here they are back at Summerslam 2013.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

This is the Total Divas match. You can add Natalya to the list of people who have fallen through the floor in a year. She has the Funkadactyls with her while Brie has Nikki and Eva Marie. I’m not sure who has the better backup here. Feeling out process to start with both girls doing their best choreographed spots. Brie slaps her in the face but has to head to the ropes to avoid a Sharpshooter attempt.

Natalya is sent to the floor and caught with a baseball slide to the back as a JBL chant starts up. Now it’s a Michael Cole chant, followed by the required Jerry version. Brie drops a leg and cranks on a chinlock as the fans want tables. Natalya fights up and puts on a quick Sharpshooter but Brie sends her into the corner. The other Divas get into it on the floor and we hit another chinlock from Brie. Back up and a sunset flip is countered into a Sharpshooter to make Brie tap at 4:19.

Rating: D-. Well that happened. It doesn’t hold up, the fans don’t care, and the whole thing is a waste of time. The girls didn’t even look all that great here as most of their outfits looked like they belonged in the 1950s. The fact that Total Divas didn’t get the Divas Title off of AJ continues to astound me.

Another title shot at Battleground 2013.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Brie Bella

Brie is challenging and takes AJ down with ease, sending the champion out to the floor. AJ hides behind Tamina and heads back inside to take over. Brie is sent into the post and AJ goes after the arm, wrapping it around the middle rope. Brie’s DDT is countered into a DDT on the arm for two before sending her shoulder first “into” the post.

AJ keeps shouting about being better than Brie before going off on the bad arm with elbows. Off to a Fujiwara Armbar but AJ lets it go to skip around the ring. Brie dropkicks her down and hits some really basic stuff before knocking AJ down with a running knee. Tamina is choking Nikki Bella down though and the distraction lets AJ roll up Brie for the pin with a handful of tights at 6:32.

Rating: D+. To recap this story, AJ won the Divas Title clean, defeated every one of the Total Divas in the same match with a completely clean submission hold, and has held the title against all of them, but we’re supposed to boo her because the other girls are catty to each other on a reality show. The match was nothing you wouldn’t see on Raw, but the fans were more into it than they were the IC Title match.

Here’s validation for a rematch on Smackdown, October 18, 2013.

Brie Bella vs. AJ Lee

Brie has a banged up shoulder. AJ immediately bails to the floor a few times but Tamina blocks Brie from going after her. Tamina finally moves and Brie gets in a right hand before sending it back inside. AJ absorbs everything Brie throws at her and snaps the bad arm over the top rope to take over. Off to an armbar as Brie screams a lot. Brie’s arm is wrapped around the middle rope and it’s already back to another armbar. The twin comes back with an elbow in the corner and a middle rope missile dropkick for two. Nikki throws Tamina into the steps, allowing Brie to grab a TERRIBLE looking Bella Buster for the pin at 3:55.

Rating: D. If this is supposed to make me sympathize with or care about the Bellas, it’s not quite working. I have a hard time caring about two beautiful women on a reality show who happen to be sleeping with two of the three top guys in the company. The whole feud started because AJ said she was a wrestler and Brie is a reality TV personality but we’re supposed to like the reality TV star on the wrestling show. Yet WWE is surprised it’s not working.

And the rematch at Hell in a Cell 2013.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Brie Bella

AJ is defending. Brie gets shoved down to start and it’s off to a quick chinlock. The fans are noticeably not that interested in the match to put it mildly. A neckbreaker puts Brie down and AJ skips around the ring to the only reaction so far. AJ hooks a guillotine choke but Brie drives her into the corner and hits a middle rope dropkick to put the champion down.

A few more dropkicks have AJ in trouble but she sends Brie into the corner to stop her. The Black Widow is countered and Brie puts on a half crab as Nikki beats up Tamina. AJ makes the rope and Brie’s running knee hits her sister, allowing the Black Widow to retain the title for AJ at 5:20.

Rating: D+. THANK GOODNESS. It’s so nice to see the talented and popular wrestler get the chance for once instead of bowing to reality TV. This likely sets up the Bella feud which no one is interested in but will give us lots of moments to look at the camera for some very REAL heart to heart moments.

Time for a six Divas tag on Raw, February 10, 2014.

Aksana/Alicia Fox/AJ Lee vs. Bella Twins/Cameron

Nikkia hits a quick facebuster on AJ to start and sends her to the floor before it’s off to Aksana. Nikki does the Worm for no apparent reason and kicks Aksana in the back for two. Brie comes in and is slammed down for two and it’s off to Alicia for another slam out of the corner for two more. A rollup gets two for Brie and Alicia runs her over to set up a chinlock. Nikki is sent to the floor as Cameron gets the hot tag and cleans house. Cameron takes Alicia down with a headscissors and gets two off a dropkick to the side of the head. A DDT, apparently called Girl Bye is enough to pin Fox at 4:43.

Rating: D-. Next. That’s all I’ve got here.

Off to a big mess at Wrestlemania XXX where the Bellas kind of stole the show.

Divas Title: Vickie Guerrero Invitational

Aksana, Alicia Fox, AJ Lee, Naomi, Brie Bella, Cameron, Emma, Eva Marie, Layla, Natalya, Nikki Bella, Rosa Mendes, Summer Rae, Tamina Snuka.

So AJ is defending and is facing the entire division, as in thirteen other girls. Good reaction for the champion but this is the death spot to end all death spots. Vickie is at ringside holding the title. AJ and Tamina are thrown into the middle of the ring and beaten on for a solid three seconds before it breaks down. Everyone is in the ring at the same time mind you. The fans want refunds and chant for Undertaker.

There’s nothing to call here other than the girls look good in their outfits and Rosa looks bizarre with short bleach blonde hair. Natalya tries a triple Sharpshooter on Cameron, Rosa and someone else but Eva makes the save. A quadruple suplex gets four near falls before Cameron hits a running Codebreaker on the champion. Cameron’s top has been ripped apart and she keeps having to cover up.

The Emma Sandwich crushes Summer and it’s time for the Parade of Finishers/moves that are allegedly finishers because most of these girls don’t ever win anything. Eva, in a swimsuit, shoves Tamina down but runs away from her. Everyone but the Bellas are knocked to the floor and the twins hit some nice suicide dives to take them out. Now it’s time for the Bellas to fight but Alicia and Nattie come back in to break it up. Tamina nails Natalya with a Samoan drop but Naomi breaks up the Splash. Natalya slams Aksana off the top for two and AJ puts Naomi in the Black Widow for the submission to retain at 6:43.

Rating: D+. There were fourteen girls in there at once and one fall to a finish. What in the world were you expecting here? Also they knew there was no way anyone was going to care and they didn’t really try to fight it. Those dives by the Bellas were nice though. Odds are this sets up Paige debuting though as there’s literally no one left for AJ to beat. Or Kharma comes back.

We’ll wrap it up with the biggest match of Brie’s career, arguably the second main event at Summerslam 2014.

Brie Bella vs. Stephanie McMahon

Stephanie is almost in a black superhero outfit. They slowly shove each other to start until Stephanie stomps away in the corner. Brie comes back with a YES Lock attempt to send Stephanie running outside, but she blocks Brie’s suicide dive with a forearm. Back in and a Hennig necksnap gets two on Brie as the announcers talk about how awesome Stephanie is. She stomps on Brie’s head and cranks on the arms as Brie looks mildly annoyed.

Brie finally kicks her in the face so Stephanie turns on the EVIL FACE, only to get caught by a Thesz Press. Some kicks in the ribs have Stephanie in trouble and a hair drag does the same. A middle rope missile dropkick gets two on McMahon and there are some HORRIBLE looking right hands.

Cue HHH for a distraction but Brie counters Stephanie’s Pedigree attempt into the YES Lock, but HHH pulls the referee to the floor. Brie kicks HHH down and starts a YES chant as Nikki is at ringside as well. Nikki comes in and stops Stephanie from leaving before turning on Brie as almost everyone expected her to. Nikki helps Stephanie up and a Pedigree gives her the pin at 11:05.

Rating: C+. Well you knew she wasn’t going to job. It’s on a bit of an adjusted scale but the match was shockingly good. That being said, it was NOWHERE near enough to justify the push its been receiving. All this to set up the Bellas fighting each other? They really think this is something people are going to be interested in? Dear goodness imagine the promos we’re going to have to sit through. The girls all looked good though.

I think I’ve covered my thoughts on Brie Bella over the last few months. She’s a very pretty woman who can rock a tight outfit, but her in ring work can only get her so far. Her acting skills on the other hand are about as horrible as humanly possible. I don’t think the fans care about the Bellas’ drama and just want to see them in outfits and looking good. There’s nothing wrong with the Divas having stories, but hearing about Brie wrecking Nikki’s car at 16 and shouting about holding each other back isn’t it. Brie has her place and is good at it when she isn’t pushed way over her head.

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Wrestler of the Day – September 23: Rene Dupree

Today is the French Tickler himself Rene Dupree.

Dupree started in his father’s Grand Prix Wrestling promotion in Montreal back in 1997. We’ll look at this match from some point in 1998, meaning Renee is about 14 years old.

Rene Dupree vs. Gary Williams

Williams is billed as the Wildman. The footage is REALLY bad here and looks like fan cam footage at best. Dupree seems to be the face here which makes sense given that it’s his dad’s promotion. Williams complains of a hair pull to start and they fight over a top wristlock with no one getting anywhere. After killing off a few seconds with that, Rene slams Gary’s head onto the mat, sending him out to the floor for a breather.

Back in and Williams runs him over a few times, only to eat a nice dropkick, knocking Gary back to the floor. A suplex brings Gary back in and sends him rolling outside again as the stalling continues. Inside again with Williams taking over and hitting the running crotch attack to the back. We hit the chinlock on Dupree for a few moments before Williams hammers away in the corner.

Dupree finally blocks a ram into a buckle but walks into a clothesline. A legdrop gets two for Gary and we’re back to the chinlock. Back up and another clothesline gets two on Rene before Williams throws him out to the floor. Gary gets two off a suplex and it’s off to another chinlock. Rene fights up and it’s a double clothesline to put both guys down. It’s Dupree up first and hammering away in the corner but getting shoved down for two.

Gary throws him outside for about the third time and for once follows him out for some brawling. Williams sends Rene into the barricade before nailing a swinging neckbreaker back inside. Rene comes back with a powerslam for two and a Russian legsweep gets the same. A side slam plants Rene for the pin but he gets his foot on the ropes. The referee catches it just late enough that Williams thinks he’s won, allowing Rene to grab a rollup for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’m giving this a break as both guys were rookies at this point. However, this really needed to be a lot shorter as it felt like it just kept going. The match ran about fifteen minutes and could have had five minutes cut out of it. Neither guy stood out and the match felt like they were filling in a lot of time, which they probably were given their level of experience.

We’ll jump ahead a few years to Rene signing with WWE and becoming part of La Resistance with Sylvan Grenier. Here they are challenging for the Raw Tag Team Titles at Bad Blood 2003.

Raw Tag Titles: La Resistance vs. RVD/Kane

You can more or less see the ending from here. The heels are Sylvan Grenier and Rene Dupree in case you didn’t know. To my complete lack of shock and dismay, this is nothing that couldn’t be on Raw. I mean there is nothing to note here at all. This could be at any house show or Raw but on PPV? Really? The heels are both on the floor and Van Dam dives, naturally hitting all three of them. A double flapjack ends this. It couldn’t have come faster.

Rating: D+. Again, WHY IS THIS ON PPV? That’s the problem with the whole first hour here. I could see an argument for the two title matches, but seriously, none of this has been PPV quality. The matches are ok, but that’s the problem: they’re just ok. Nothing at all here is making me want to watch this show at all and it’s never something I’m going to watch again. I just want to get to the end of this show and forget about it.

Here’s a defense at Summerslam 2003.

Raw Tag Titles: Dudley Boyz vs. La Resistance

The Dudleyz are challenging and the EVIL foreigners are Rene Dupree and Sylvain Grenier. Bubba of course comes out with an American flag to hammer in the face status. The whole patriotism thing was a big deal in this feud as the third member of La Resistance, an American named Rob Conway, pretended to be a soldier to sneak up on the Dudleyz. It’s a brawl to start in the aisle with the challengers in full control.

D-Von chokes Dupree with the robe to start before armbarring Grenier down. A slam and a legdrop gets two on Sylvain and it’s off to Bubba for the power brawling. He puts Grenier in the Tree of Woe and stands on his crotch to make the French guy scream. The Dudleys clear the ring but Grenier gets in a cheap shot to give the champions control on Bubba. A double shoulder puts Bubba down for two as the USA chant starts up.

Back to Dupree for a bearhug, which isn’t often a move you see on a fat man like Bubba. Some headbutts break up hold but Bubba walks into a spinebuster for two. Bubba punches his way over to the hot tag (four minutes into the match) and D-Von cleans house. A rollup gets two on Grenier as everything breaks down. D-Von walks into a double spinebuster for two but it’s What’s Up to Dupree. The 3D lays out Dupree but Grenier makes save. Now a cameraman lays out D-Von with a camera to the head to retain the titles. It’s Rob Conway of course.

Rating: D+. That’s a pretty lame choice for an opener. Not only did the fans not get what they wanted but the match sucked as well. This was a dark time for the tag team division and there was no reason at all for there to be two sets of titles at this point. At the end of the day there wasn’t nearly enough depth and it made for lame matches like this. The Dudleys would get the belts next month.

With the tag division such a mess, the idea was to just throw four teams into one match at Wrestlemania XX.

Raw Tag Titles: La Resistance vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. Booker T/Rob Van Dam

Booker and RVD are defending and this is one fall to a finish. Booker has an AWFUL remix of his song here so hopefully they drop the belts so we don’t have to hear it again. Van Dam and Dupree get us going with Rob monkey flipping him down. Booker comes in with a side kick for two and a hip toss for an interfering Conway. Rene is knocked into the Dudley corner for a tag off to Bubba with the Dudley getting two off a neckbreaker. Booker comes back with a side kick but D-Von tags himself in before the cover. RVD jumps in with a kick to the face of D-Von but there was no tag so it’s Jindrak vs. Booker instead.

Cade and Jindrak take over on Booker in the corner but Rene steals a tag to take over. This match needs to end already. We’re four minutes in and I’m already bored. Conway hooks a bow and arrow hold which goes on WAY longer than needed. Booker fights out with a spinebuster for no cover but it’s not hot tag to RVD. Everything breaks down but D-Von breaks up the Five Star. It’s Booker vs. D-Von but Cade breaks up 3D. The scissors kick and Five Star are enough to pin Conway and retain the titles.

Rating: D. Sacre bleu what a waste of my time. No one card about this match because the tag division was so dead at this point that almost every team was just thrown together. Since this is Wrestlemania though, there’s ANOTHER four way tag match later tonight. Nothing to see here and the match sucked on all levels. Let’s get on to ANYTHING else.

Dupree would get a singles run and feuded with John Cena over the US Title over the summer of 2004. Here they are at Judgment Day 2004.

US Title: John Cena vs. Rene Dupree

Surprisingly enough Cena comes out first here. It’s amazing to hear Cena almost universally cheered. Cena rhymes a bit before the match starts and makes fun of the Spurs who had lost to the Lakers in the playoffs recently. To be fair to Dupree, he’s 20 here and was a champion at 19 which is a WWE record. Cena hammers him down but a boot in the corner stops him for what must have been a good four seconds.

We hit the floor for a bit where Cena hits the post. Again Cena misses a charge and hits the floor which has become a running theme in this match. He can’t get anything going here and Dupree keeps up the offense. Bear hug goes on by Dupree just to reaffirm that he’s evil. I know they’ve happened but how often does a face not named Sammartino use a bear hug?

This eats up awhile until Cena gets a jawbreaker to escape. Cena cranks it up a bit and a sidewalk slam puts Dupree down. Five Knuckle Shuffle misses as Dupree casually rolls out of the way. That makes me chuckle for some reason. Spinebuster sets up the French Tickler (don’t ask) and after a brief comeback Cena walks into a DDT for still no cover. FU is countered into a neckbreaker for two. A few pinning combinations by Cena get two each but the FU out of nowhere ends this.

Rating: C. This was just ok. I don’t think anyone ever bought Dupree as a threat here which hurts things a bit but not horribly. Cena needed a win like this on PPV as he only won the title a month or so earlier. Not a horrible match but really just one of those where it came and went with not many people buying into the hype of it.

Another title shot at Great American Bash 2004.

US Title: John Cena vs. Rene Dupree vs. Booker T vs. Rob Van Dam

This is elimination rules and Cena is champion coming in. Cena fires up the crowd a bit and that’s a LOUD chant for him. He makes gay jokes about Angle in his pre-match rap. Also RVD likes marijuana, Booker used to be GI Bro and Rene Dupree wants to be Cena. This is also a Navy town so Rene is gay right? Booker and RVD go at it as do John and Rene to start us off. This is under tornado rules.

Rob and Booker fight to the floor. I think Rene is the only heel here but I’m not sure on Booker. Off to Rene vs. RVD. Booker is chilling on the floor to avoid getting beaten up which is really smart strategy. Yeah Booker is officially a heel in this. He turned on RVD a few weeks back. See? Cole can be useful at times. Rene hooks a chinlock on RVD to waste some time. Rob fights back and hits a split legged moonsault for two.

Rolling Thunder gets the same. Cena does something for the first time in about four minutes, picking up Rene on the floor, only to get flipped onto by RVD. Cena vs. Rob in the ring now and they exchange near falls. RVD slides to the floor and tells Booker to get in. They get in an argument so RVD throws Booker in for a beating. Cena slides to the floor and throws Rene in to replace him. Cena and RVD are just kind of chilling on the floor.

Dupree hits a powerslam and does the French Tickler (don’t ask) but walks into a Booker spinebuster. Five Star hits Rene but there’s no cover. Cena goes up and gets kicked off by RVD. Five Star hits Booker this time but Cena rolls in and cradles Van Dam for the first elimination. Booker and Dupree team up on Cena with Booker hitting the side kick for two. Rene got the cover and Booker isn’t thrilled with that.

Cena takes advantage of their argument to beat them both up. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled by this match either. Throwback to Booker and Cena pumps it up. FU (noticeably different than the modern version) puts down Dupree. Booker hits an axe kick on Cena and eliminates Rene. So it’s down to one on one now. Side slam gets two and what appeared to be a fast count. Off to a chinlock to kill some time.

The announcers talk about a mini feud Cena has had with Taker. Today, that’s a Wrestlemania dream match. Here, it’s a two week filler feud. Booker chops away in the corner and gets the Jack Brisco spinning sunset flip out of the corner for two. Axe kick misses though and the FU keeps the title on Cena.

Rating: C-. Not bad here, but the problem was in the match structure. With it being elimination rules, it actually made things easier on Cena. Like you saw with Booker and Dupree, you can pretty much just chill on the floor for two eliminations and then get it down to a one on one match. Then again, Cena pinned RVD first anyway so he would have won either way, which again begs the question of why it wasn’t just one fall. That would be because they needed to fill an extra seven minutes.

Here’s a very unique match on Smackdown, August 12, 2004.

Team Cena vs. Team Booker T.

John Cena, Rob Van Dam, Charlie Haas

Booker T., Rene Dupree, Luther Reigns

This is a very interesting idea. It’s called a Summer Relay match. The match is one fall to a finish and it’s going to be Rob Van Dam vs. Booker T. to start. They’ll wrestle for five minutes (assuming there’s no fall) and then Booker’s team can send in a replacement (due to winning a coin toss) for another five minute period. After those five minutes (ten minutes total), Cena’s team can send in a replacement. After five more minutes (fifteen total), Booker’s team gets to send in a replacement. These five minute periods alternate until someone gets a fall. To my knowledge, this is the only time this gimmick was ever used.

Cena has a rap about his team before the match and hits on Jackie Gayda a bit. It’s Rob Van Dam vs. Booker to get things going and the clock begins. Booker takes over in the corner to start and chops away before hitting a bad looking hot shot. A hook kick to the face gets two on Rob and we hit the arm hold. Some chops in the corner have Rob in even more trouble but he comes back with a hard kick to the face. Rob nails some more kicks for two before kicking Booker in the jaw again. He heads up top and connects with the Five Star but stays down too long, allowing the clock to run out.

Luther Reigns comes in next as another five minute period begins. He hammers on the downed Van Dam and we take a break. Back with a minute left in the period and Rob coming back with some right hands. A springboard kick to the jaw sets up Rolling Thunder but the delayed cover only gets two. Reigns nails a spinebuster but misses a knee drop as the period ends and Charlie Haas comes in.

Charlie goes after the leg and puts on a kind of Indian Deathlock to take over. He cranks on the knee even more but Luther fights up and hits a release butterfly suplex. A big belly to back suplex gets two for Luther and we take a break. Back with Dupree getting two on Haas before chopping away in the corner. Rene goes up but gets armdragged down to put both guys on the mat. A good looking series of Rolling Germans get some two counts for Charlie as frustration is setting in.

Booker gets in a cheap shot from the floor and Dupree puts on an STF (Cena hadn’t started using it yet) until the period ends. It’s Cena coming in but he checks on Charlie before going after Dupree. Cena hammers away but gets caught by a neckbreaker for two. Off to a camel clutch on John for a minute or so before Cena comes back with a kind of cutter to escape. A big clothesline puts Dupree down but he plants Cena with a spinebuster. It’s time for the French Tickler (a stupid dance) but Cena avoids the punch and grabs a flapjack. There’s the Shuffle but Rene grabs the ropes to counter the FU.

Booker comes in for the showdown with Cena as they’re about to start a best of five series for Booker’s US Title. It’s Booker in early control and he does You Can’t See Me before dropping a knee for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Cena avoids a side kick, sending Booker out to the floor. Van Dam gets in a few shots (Tazz: “That’s not kosher!”) before Booker is sent back inside for a rollup and the pin by Cena.

Rating: C. Well that was…..something. It was basically a series of hot tag sequences which makes for an odd match. I can see why they didn’t go back to the idea as it’s pretty easy to understand but doesn’t work for a match concept. This wasn’t a disaster but it’s pretty clear why we never saw it again.

Rene would be paired with Kenzo Suzuki and win the Smackdown Tag Team Titles in late 2004. Here they are defending at No Mercy 2004.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Kenzo Suzuki/Rene Dupree vs. Rob Van Dam/Rey Mysterio

I vaguely remember Suzuki and Dupree as champions. My guess is that there’s a reason I don’t remember more. I know I remember thinking Kenzo bored me to death. Kenzo tries to sing Born in the USA pre match. Rob and Rene start us off. A quick powerbomb attempt is countered into a pin attempt by Rob and we get a standoff. Rey tags himself in and the challengers speed things up, resulting in a dropkick by Rey for two.

Suzuki comes in. Cole refers to him by his nickname of the bronze warrior, causing Tazz to say “Do you think he aspires to be a golden warrior?” Well at least it wasn’t about pigeons. The champs are both sent to the floor and the challengers hit stereo dives. Cole: “Only on Smackdown!” Except when it’s on PPV right Cole? Rob vs. Kenzo in the ring now but Rob is quickly send to the floor as Rene pushed him off the top.

We hear about Kenzo winning the Young Lions Cup and it’s back to Rene for a neck crank. A knee drop by Kenzo gets two. There’s the hot tag to Rey (minus the hot part) who cleans house and destroys Kenzo. Seated senton gets two. Rene breaks up the 619 but Rob breaks up a powerbomb. Rolling Thunder takes out Dupree and now the 619 connects. Dupree breaks up the West Coast Pop though, only to get taken out by Van Dam. Kenzo cradles Mysterio and grabs the rope for the pin.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t horrible but you could really see that the tag titles were in shambles at this point. To be fair they had been for years so that’s hardly breaking news, but you get the idea. Not much of a match but it didn’t suck, which is really all you can ask for from these thrown together matches.

We’ll jump ahead a few months to Sunday Night Heat, August 14, 2005.

Rene Dupree vs. Matt Striker

Striker doesn’t mean anything yet and Rene is an EVIL Frenchman with the mustache to prove it. Matt gets shoved down to start but grabs a quick rollup for two before doing Rene’s French Tickler dance. A big clothesline drops Rene and he stomps Matt on the mat to take over. We hit the chinlock for a bit before a falling headbutt gets two for Dupree. He throws Matt out to the floor before taking it back inside for another chinlock. Striker fights up and nails a slam followed by a high cross body for two. Dupree punches him out of the air though and nails a cobra clutch slam for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a somewhat lengthy squash here without much to it. Dupree just didn’t do it for me at this point and I think WWE was starting to give up on him as well. On the other hand you have Striker, who never quite worked as a wrestler either. He doesn’t have the look for it and it’s hard to get behind someone that small without anything interesting about him.

Dupree would go to the new ECW and appeare on the September 12, 2006 show.

Rene Dupree vs. Balls Mahoney

Dupree jumps him to start but Balls comes back with the signature punches in the corner. A charge hits the post for Mahoney though and a bottom rope splash gets two for Rene. Taz: “That’s extreme?” A middle rope elbow gets the same and I can’t believe I’m watching this on ECW.

I get the idea that they’re going with to have Dupree as a heel in ECW, but it doesn’t change the fact that we’ve had guys like Shannon Moore, Mike Knox and Rene Dupree on this show. Mahoney snaps off the Nutcracker Sweet (sitout spinebuster) for two and they head to the floor. Balls gets a chair but Thorn kicks him into the steps, giving Dupree the pin.

Rating: D. Like I said, at the end of the day you can only get so into a match about Rene Dupree. Mahoney is one of the holdovers from the original ECW who at least looks like he belongs on a show about Extreme wrestling. This wasn’t good by almost any standard but it set up Thorn vs. Mahoney which is less dull than this was.

Dupree would head to Japan soon after this and appeared for the Hustle promotion on September 22, 2007.

Wataru Sakata vs. Rene Dupree

They chop it out to start until Rene nails a running clothesline to take over. A discus punch sends Sakata into the corner and Rene hammers away. Wataru kicks him off the top rope and nails another kick to send Rene HARD into the barricade, busting him open. Dupree can barely stand up but comes back with a right hand to stagger Sakata. He can’t nail a powerbomb though and Wataru nails a piledriver for two.

We hit the chinlock on Rene followed by some kicks to the back. Sakata takes off a turnbuckle pad and sends Rene face first into the post. A release overhead belly to belly sends Rene flying but he’s able to pop up and crotch Sakata with a dropkick. Wataru is still able to break up a superplex and gets two off a top rope double stomp. A quick BK Bomb gets two for Rene but he gets kicked in the ribs and caught in an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Sakata chokes him out for the win.

Rating: B-. I was totally buying into the story near the end here with Rene busted open and injured and having to survive everything Sakata threw at him. I had no idea what was going on with the story or who the characters were but they were able to tell a story with their actions. That’s really impressive stuff and what people mean by wrestling being an art form.

We’ll jump ahead a few years with Rene wrestling for the Wrestle-1 promotion on September 22, 2013.

Rene Dupree vs. Tajiri

They take each other into the corner to start and it’s actually a clean break. Rene gets him on the mat but Tajiri spins out and cranks on the arm. Back up and we get a test of strength until Tajiri takes him down in a top wristlock. We get some nice mat work with a nice series of counters with both guys trying to control the arm. Rene gets two off a shoulder block and we hit the headlock on Tajiri. Some armdrags send Dupree out to the floor and things slow way down.

Back in and Rene offers a handshake while crossing his heart that he won’t cheat. Naturally he dropkicks Tajiri before hitting a cartwheel elbow in the corner. Rene takes him down with an abdominal stretch on the mat before going to a regular chinlock. Dupree goes up top but gets kicked in the head. We get to the series of Tajiri kicks with a big superkick getting two. A quick brainbuster gets two for Dupree but he makes the mistake of charging into the Tarantula. The Buzzsaw Kick is enough to give Tajiri the pin.

Rating: C+. Not bad here with both guys having a different style and making it work. The technical stuff was a nice thing to see at the beginning before they got into the faster paced back and forth stuff. Tajiri’s kicks were crisp as always and that Buzzsaw Kicks looked lethal. I’ve always liked Tajiri and he still looked good here.

We’ll wrap it up with Rene appearing at One Night Only: Global Impact Japan for TNA.

Keiji Mutoh/Rob Terry/Taiyo Kea vs. Masayuki Kono/Rene Dupree/Samoa Joe

Joe’s team gets the jobber treatment and Mutoh might retire if he loses. Joe and Kea get things going with Joe hammering away in the corner, only to have Kea no sell most of the shots. A big boot has little effect on Joe and an elbow to Kea’s jaw has the same result. Off to Terry vs. Dupree for a posedown before Renee dropkicks Terry’s knee out. Kono comes in to try a double suplex but Terry suplexes both of them at the same time.

Mutoh gets the tag for the power drive elbow before putting Kono in an STF. Back to Kea for chops followed by Terry for some cranking on the arm. Mutoh puts on a sleeper but Dupree gets in a cheap shot. Joe glares at his partner for the cheap shot and does the same thing to Kono, even going so far as to save Mutoh. Apparently he’s fine with backsplashing Mutoh for two and putting on the Koquina Clutch but everything breaks down.

Things settle down and Mutoh mostly misses a dropkick to Joe and the tag brings in Kea. A Russian legsweep gets two on Joe but he comes back with a powerslam. Off to Kono who gets caught in something resmbling a running DDT. Terry gets the tag and gets the crowd to clap a lot before hitting a slow motion Jackhammer. Kea rolls away and tags in Dupree who is quickly backdropped down.

Muta comes in and takes out everyone with dragon screw legwhips before putting Renee in a Figure Four. Kono makes a save so Muta hits Dupree with a Shining Wizard but everything breaks down. Members of the Desperadoes stable comes in to attack Mutoh but Joe won’t help them. He takes a chair from Dupree and headbutts him before walking out, allowing Mutoh to hit the Shining Wizard for the pin on Dupree.

Rating: D+. Well you knew Mutoh wasn’t jobbing here. This match was a big mess though with Joe wanting to do the right thing or whatever it was while all of the people interfered (and Tenay just expected us to know who they were because EVERYONE follows a year old Japanese promotion). This felt like “let’s all love Mutoh” and while he deserves respect, I don’t care for matches that turn into stuff like this. It wasn’t terrible or anything and the story made good sense, but it was messy.

Rene Dupree is a guy who had a great look and was decent in the ring but his appeal never made sense. He’s not bad or anything and he’s impressive given how young he was when he started, but he never did anything for me. His WWE stuff wasn’t great but he seems to have become a much bigger deal in Japan. Dupree is talented, but he doesn’t stand out all that well.

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Wrestler of the Day – September 22: Sabu

Today’s Wrestler of the Day is genocidal and homicidal yet keeps getting jobs somehow. It’s Sabu.

Sabu got his start in the mid 1980s after training with his uncle the Sheik. We’ll pick things up in Minnesota in 1991.

Chris Candido vs. Sabu

Candido is about 19 here and Sabu has the Original Sheik with him. There’s no commentary here so if there’s a story I’m unaware of it. Feeling out process to start with Candido being sent into the corner. Sabu grabs a chair and Chris wisely runs. Sheik takes the chair away and Candido nails a pair of suplexes. Sabu sends him to the floor a few times before catching Chris with a suicide dive. Back in and Sabu hits a quick springboard moonsault for the pin.

Rating: D. This was pretty horrible but that’s understandable as neither guy was anything more than a glorified rookie. Sabu would get, I guess you could say better, in a few years while Candido would actually improve. There’s nothing to the match but guys need ring time at this stage of their careers.

Off to Japan for a match in Michinoku Pro from December 10, 1993.

Sabu vs. Jerry Lynn

Sabu dives at Lynn’s legs to take him down fast but Jerry cranks on a leg lock to take over. Back up and a clothesline gets two for Sabu before he puts on a leg lock of his own. Jerry climbs the corner for an armdrag but Sabu takes him right back down to the mat to crank on the leg some more. A hurricanrana gets two on Jerry but Sabu misses a moonsault press. Jerry’s connects for two and a German suplex gets the same. Sabu nails a leg lariat and goes up top, only to get dropkicked down to the floor.

A big flip dive takes him down again and they head back inside. Lynn gets knocked to the floor with a spin kick and Sabu nails a big dive of his own. They bust out the table with Sabu nailing a flip dive onto Lynn on the table but the wood doesn’t break. Jerry pops up and nails him in the head with the table before planting Sabu with a tiger drive onto the table. It STILL doesn’t break so Lynn throws him back in, only to miss a top rope splash. The Arabian Press gives Sabu the pin.

Rating: C-. Even as a rookie Lynn was looking polished in the ring. The table stuff was freaking sick looking as I guess Japan made thicker tables. It wasn’t a great match or anything but it’s weird to see guys with names this big being curtain jerkers. At least the match wasn’t half bad and Sabu’s stuff was far more impressive back then.

It’s off to ECW now with one of the company’s most famous matches at the Night the Line Was Crossed.

Shane Douglas vs. Sabu

This is a #1 contenders match and the title match will take place immediately afterwards. Heyman runs out with a phone and blasts Shane’s manager, Sherri, to take her out. With over an hour to go, this is the main event, and yes it’s that long. Joey has audio trouble so while he’s shouting you can’t understand a word of it. You can hear the crowd so clearly my audio is working.

Ah there he is. If there’s no winner here then it’s a three way for the title. The time limit here is only 15 minutes so I’m not expecting much. 911 is on the floor with Heyman as it’s all Shane at this point. Sabu hits a spinning kick which is really just an elbow as the foot never gets close. That’s par for the course with him though so there we are. Five minutes in and this is one sided. The king of Bombay, Michigan works the right arm of all things and the fans want Funk.

Dang he really is cranking on that thing and it looks great. The arm work goes on for a very long time. Shane gets out with an FU of all things. Man Cena if you’re going to use the same moves at least don’t copy them. DAng dude. Ten minutes in and it’s not bad so far. Shane with a big boot? What the heck??? He’s not even tall enough for that but whatever.

We hit the floor with three minutes left. It’s pretty clear that Funk is going to be involved here. It’s not like that was a real secret or anything. Sabu gets a chair on the floor and it results in Shane being on a table. Good thing Sabu misses it completely and lands in the crowd. Sabu is more or less dead with 30 seconds left. For no apparent reason Shane doesn’t cover him and here’s Terry.

ECW Title: Shane Douglas vs. Terry Funk vs. Sabu

Ok so is this 60 minutes or are Shane and Sabu going 75? Sabu leaves, I guess with an injury and it’s Shane vs. Terry. Given that we have less than an hour in the tape and there are post match interviews, the whole thing is an hour but Funk only has to go 45. Ok then. Funk hits a piledriver on the floor but we can’t see all of it since it’s not on the camera side. To be fair the same thing happened at the end of the 94 Rumble so that’s a thing of the times and not ECW.

Funk hits a pair of DDTs in the ring (one like a football being spiked and one being like a basketball being bounced according to Joey). Terry wants a chair so about 6 people throw them in. They get piled up and Shane takes ANOTHER DDT on them. Seriously that’s all we’ve had from Funk so far: DDTs and a piledriver. Shane manages to beat Funk to his feet after that DDT which is odd.

Shane beats on Funk who now has a bad back it seems. This is moving REALLY slowly and nothing of note is happening. We had a long stretch of brawling in the audience and nothing of note happened. Douglas mixes things up with a DDT of his own. How innovative! All Shane here as Funk is busted open. The referee goes down at some point and this is literally putting me to sleep.

They slug it out for a bit and then head into the crowd. We’re 30 minutes in here and are in the crowd. This has been far from great like it’s built up to be. For some reason the arena looks like it’s full of smoke. So yeah the whole one hour three way dance thing is pretty much nonsense. Ah here’s Sabu FINALLY after being gone about fifteen minutes. Funk comes up towards the announce table and steals a mic, Joey’s in this case, thinking he’s yelling at the crowd and therefore the guys in the ring. The problem is that he’s yelling into Joey’s mic so only the people watching the tape can hear him. Brilliant.

We’re thirty five minutes in and Sabu is in a spinning toehold. 911 comes in and lets Heyman hit Funk with the phone (it’s Paul E. Dangerously but you get the idea). Terry gets a neckbreaker on the guy whose neck would be broken by Benoit later on but Heyman saves again. The triple sleeper spot hits which is either creative or idiotic. I’m not sure why it would be idiotic but it has that feeling to it. Again, no idea why.

Now it’s basically who can get the longest leg lock on Sabu. Shane puts on a Figure Four, but remember that Ric Flair is a horrible man. We hit 40 minutes and Heyman saves Sabu again. Sabu botches the heck out of a springboard moonsault. Sherri is in the ring for no apparent reason. Axl and Ian Rotten come out to help Funk as Shane gets two on Sabu. Sabu botches a rana and Terry leaves. Yeah…..this whole triple threat has been a triple threat for about 3 minutes out of almost 45.

A springboard legdrop hits Shane in a clip from Rise and Fall of ECW. And here are the Rottens to beat up both guys again. This is making my head hurt. We’re 45 minutes in so I only have 15 minutes left. Joey says 15 minutes left in what match? So somehow we’ve gone from Terry Funk vs. Shane vs. Sabu to Shane/Sabu vs. the Rotten Brothers. Sabu fights the Rottens to the back and Shane is alone in the ring. He just stands there and here comes Sabu….oh never mind he has to fight one of the Rottens again first.

Funk comes back, as do Paul, 911 and Ian Rotten. And now there’s no one in the ring. Hat Guy is back by the concession areas and Funk vs. Shane spills outside. This must have been RIVETING for the live crowd with no video screens. And Funk beats up the referee. Joey tries not to laugh while asking why. With ten minutes left Shane and Terry are beating each other up and we now get the clock going again on how long can all three guys be in the ring for. So far out of 50 minutes I’d guess it’s about 9 minutes.

Sabu hits a top rope moonsault and Funk’s knee is hurt. Joey says the match was over 15-20 minutes ago. To quote him, what match? Shane vs. Terry? Shane vs. Sabu? Sabu/Shane vs. the Rottens? Terry vs. one of them? Sherri vs. the laws of time and gravity? The referee stays dead for the better part of ever. He must have been watching the match.

Five more minutes and the fans suddenly get that this is going to a draw. Another new match breaks out with Terry beating up Sherri. Four minutes left and nothing at all is happening. The bald Heyman is knocked out by Shane. Let’s see: Rottens, Sherri, 911, Heyman….yeah I think that’s all. We’ve only had five run-ins so far. Three minutes and we’re out of here (the clock is ticking and we’re in the clear).

Sherri’s boot gets used a lot as Joey makes me angry by saying this is like Piper vs. Valentine from 1983. The camera goes black for a minute and we have two minutes left. Funk beats up Heyman for no good reason. Less than a minute to go and the referee has now been out over ten minutes from a single headbutt. Can we get this guy some medical attention? Two near falls within the last five seconds and that’s it. The fans give them a standing ovation for absolutely no deserved reason. This was bad…..like very bad.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t horrible and there have been far worse matches, but for this to be considered a classic or even a very good match is a joke. This “hour long triple threat” is more like a 15 minute triple threat, two fifteen minute singles matches, a 4 minute tag match and a bunch of standing around.

Sabu was SPENT about half an hour into this and he just laid on the mat for most of the time. I was bored to death watching this because the longest stretch where they’re all in the arena is about 8 minutes long. I have no idea what the standing ovation was for as this was just way too long and while it’s not horrible, it’s definitely not anywhere close to as good as it’s made out to be.

Sabu would jump to WCW in late 1995 in a kind of strange hire. Here’s his biggest match with the company from Halloween Havoc 1995.

Mr. JL vs. Sabu

JL is short for Jerry Lynn in case you didn’t know that. And yes, it’s the same Sabu. The reason he’s here is he’s the Sheik’s nephew and Sheik was the king of Detroit back in the day. Lynn is in a mask here. WOW it’s weird hearing Sabu being talked about by Tony. Also that sounds like La Parka’s future music but I’m not sure. Both guys are in purple which is odd to see. They do all kinds of flying around ringside with Sabu doing all kinds of crazy dives etc.

We even get a Bobo Brazil reference to make this even more off the wall. This is pretty good for today’s standards despite being sloppy, but for 1995 this was INSANE. I mean remember, WWF was running stuff like Mabel vs. Taker at this time so having Lynn vs. Sabu on a major PPV was ridiculous. Sabu wins it with a moonsault and Sheik throws a fireball at Lynn and hits him in the mask. Ok then. Heenan freaks over this and wants to know how to do that. Don’t ask Hogan. He tried it once and it didn’t work at all.

Rating: B+. Somewhat above average match, but considering the timeframe, this was insanity. Rey was nearly a year away from changing the whole idea of what cruiserweight wrestling was, but everyone knew this kind of stuff rocked. Sabu can be passable when he’s not trying to do a garbage match, and this is an example of that.

Back to ECW at November to Remember 1995.

Hack Meyers vs. Sabu

Meyers is more or less just a biker. You know this might have been a better surprise if he hadn’t come out earlier. Sabu works on the knee of all things to start and messes up a snapmare (Meyers landed on him). Time for a chinlock. FEEL THE EXTREME! It’s chair time and a slingshot dive in with the chair gets two. We go to an armbar and the fans are calling it boring.

Springboard leg lariat gets two and we hit the chinlock again. Meyers makes a comeback and hits a powerslam for two. A weird facebuster off the top which is Hack’s finisher gets two. They go to the floor quickly but Sabu drops a leg for two. Meyers wins a slugout but Sabu goes onto Meyers’ shoulders and gets a DDT to take him down. Spinning leg lariat puts Meyers outside and Sabu hits a diving rana to the floor.

After a bit more brawling on the floor we go back in but Sabu dives into a powerbomb. Release suplex put Sabu down but Meyers goes up and gets caught in a victory roll off the top for two. This is going WAY too long for a big return over a glorified jobber. Meyers goes up but gets dropped on a chair. Sabu hits a rana to put them on the floor AGAIN. Sabu sets up a table and dives over the top through it, half killing Meyers. That only gets two in the ring so Sabu slams him and the Atomic Arabian Facebuster (flipping double legdrop with a chair in between) ends this FINALLY.

Rating: D. See, when a superstar like Sabu returns, it should be total dominance. This mostly was, but the fact that it took so long made Sabu look kind of weak. Not his worst stuff, but at the same time it just went way too long at about 13:00. Heyman would manage Sabu for awhile until we got to his match with Taz.

Another random match from House Party 1996.

Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

Richards slips getting into the ring and falls on his face. He also has a bad arm coming into this. Richards runs to start and throws in a chair. Yeah, throw a chair to Sabu. Joey agrees with me, saying that it’s like handing a chainsaw to Leatherface. Sabu has enough of the standing around so he hits a suicide dive to take over. Back inside and Sabu hooks a chinlock but Stevie powerbombs him out of the corner to take over.

Sabu will have none of that and comes back with a slingshot flipping legdrop. Off to an armbar of all things but it only lasts a few seconds. Richards is placed on the top rope and with the help of a chair, Sabu “hits” Air Sabu to knock him to the floor. Sabu slams him to the floor and both guys are down. Richards gets sent into the railing and Sabu sets up a table. Blue Meanie saves Stevie and we head back inside.

Sabu gets caught in an electric chair position but he rolls Richards over the top and out to the floor. This show needs to hurry up and end because it’s REALLY dragging badly now. Richards head fakes Sabu and the crazy one goes through the table. That would be the crazy one Sabu in case you were confused. Meanie gets in a kick on Sabu and they head inside again. Stevie drops a top rope punch for two as we see that he’s not the best on offense.

A Frankensteiner gets two for Sabu and both guys are spent. Richards is sent to the floor and Sabu finally dives over the top with a slingshot rana onto Meanie. Richards gets a horribly botched one of his own from Sabu and the guy in the bright yellow pants takes over again. Richards is placed on a table but Meanie makes the save.

Paul E of all people comes out to beat up Meanie and Sabu hits a dive through Richards through the table. Back inside and that only gets two as this match just keeps going. Richards rolls him up for two and hits the Stevie Kick for another two. A Sabu DDT gets the same and it’s chair time again. Sabu goes up and hits the Atomic Arabian Facebuster (flip leg drop with the chair) to get a pretty anti-climactic pin.

Rating: C-. This just kept going and going and it was only decent to begin with. Sabu would be pushed much harder over the next few months as he would feud with Taz while Richards would somehow get into the world title #1 contenders match at Barely Legal. This wasn’t awful but it dragged a lot which really hurt it.

It’s time for probably Sabu’s biggest match ever. The match over a year in the making, from Barely Legal.

Taz vs. Sabu

This is billed as the Grudge Match of the Century and has been built up over going on two years. Sabu charges to the ring without an entrance but stops long enough for the big match intros. Taz is the hated villain at this point which will become important later. They slap each other to start before Taz nails a hard clothesline to send Sabu staggering to the floor. Back in and Sabu fights out of the Tazmission (Taz’s choke) and they hit the mat for some amateur stuff.

It’s Taz in control with an ankle lock but he lets Sabu up and offers him a free chance at his leg. That goes very badly for Sabu as Taz takes him down and fires off some hard crossface shots to break Sabu’s nose. The blood sends Sabu into another level and he pulls Taz out to the floor so he can throw him into the crowd. Sabu runs back inside for a HUGE double jump dive to send Taz sprawling down on the concrete.

They fight into the crowd as things pick up a lot. Sabu gets the better of it for a good while, only to be sent face first into a wall. Back to the ring now and Taz puts on a chinlock while cranking on the leg as well. They slug it out from their knees with Sabu getting the better of it until Taz takes it back down to the mat. Sabu kicks him in the face and nails a quick slingshot legdrop.

A chair is brought in for Air Sabu in the corner but Taz drops him face first on the chair to take over again. Back up and a very hard clothesline gets a near fall on Sabu as things slow way down. Taz is sent outside again but casually steps to the side so Sabu’s dive hits barricade. A suplex sends Sabu back into the crowd and Taz orders his lackeys (Team Taz) to bridge a table between the barricade and the ring. Sabu puts Taz on the table but Taz counters a tornado DDT and sends Sabu through the wood instead.

Back in again and Taz is favoring his shoulder. Instead he stomps away at Sabu but falls down to the mat in pain. Sabu nails a top rope hurricanrana for two followed by a top rope legdrop but Taz rolls outside, seemingly in the better shape of the two. Taz slaps on a head and arms Tazplex to drop Sabu on his head and soften up the neck. Sabu comes back with a t-bone suplex of his own but Taz just stands up and poses at him. After a failed attempt at a Tazmission from Sabu, Taz nails some more hard suplexes and puts on the real Tazmission for the win.

Rating: B-. Here’s the one thing that has always given me issues with both this match and the show in general: yes this was a huge grudge match and built up for over a year, but they never say WHY these two hate each other. It’s simply established that they do and while the match is really physical, it would have been nice to have a ten second explanation of the backstory (Sabu had walked out on ECW and Taz had yelled about it on TV as a result. Sabu later came back and the feud started as a result of Taz’s comments) would have been nice. I only know that explanation through outside research.

The match itself was a very physical back and forth match, but it never felt like the blood feud that it was supposed to be. There are parts of that in here, but the wrestling sequence early in the match felt like it belonged in another feud entirely. It’s entertaining and goes by very fast though, making a breath of fresh air after the TV Title match.

Sabu would get back into the World Title picture at Born To Be Wired.

ECW World Title: Terry Funk vs. Sabu

Sabu is challenging and this is a barbed wire match, which means the ropes have been replaced by barbed wire. Terry heads to the corner to start but Sabu dropkicks the knee out and we head to the mat. Funk tries to throw him into the wire but Sabu puts the brakes on. Sabu does the same as Terry but Terry rolls to the floor to escape. Back in and Sabu puts on a quick camel clutch which goes nowhere.

Funk hits a neckbreaker and a scary looking piledriver for two. They both try to ram the other into the wire and it’s Sabu getting the advantage, but Terry gets his hands up and avoids the pain. Sabu hurricanranas Terry down for two but Funk kicks him off and into the wire for the first gasp from the crowd. Terry rakes Sabu’s eyes into the barbed wire which is pretty sick stuff.

An Irish whip sends the challenger into the wire again and Funk crotches him on it for good measure. Sabu’s tights are ripped up and man are his legs skinny. After some more pain for the guy from Bombay, he sends Terry into the corner and the wire as a result, followed by a chair shot. Funk’s face gets sent into the barbed wire and Sabu finds a spike from somewhere to pound into Funk’s head. This is getting violent in a hurry.

With Funk up against the wire, Sabu hits Air Sabu to drive him further into said wire for two. Air Sabu (it’s a running diving leg attack using a chair as a springboard) misses on its second attempt and Sabu is hung up in the wire. In a famous spot, Sabu’s bicep is sliced open and things slow WAY down. The solution to the cut? Fonzie brings in a roll of tape and tapes the GAPING WOUND closed to keep the match going.

A neckbreaker puts Sabu down but Terry can’t follow up. Sabu goes NUTS and starts pounding on Funk but Terry just punches him in the face to take over again. They both head to the floor and slug it out but are quickly back inside so Funk can put on the spinning toe hold. Fonzie (Sabu’s manager in case you’re not familiar with ECW, which makes me wonder why you’re reading this) tries to interfere but gets pulled across the wire as well.

Funk slices open Fonzie’s shirt and cuts his back with it. The champ gets some wire cutters from somewhere and clips some wire off, which he whips Sabu with to slow him down even more. Fonzie gets beaten up some more and it’s back inside for more brawling. Sabu cuts more of the wire down and here’s RVD to pound on Funk. He takes Terry to the floor and wraps him in barbed wire so Sabu can drive Terry through a table.

Now Dreamer comes out to take out Van Dam (literally) and the guys in the match head back inside. Sabu pulls off a big section of wire and wraps himself in it before diving through Funk through a table. To complete this mess, they’re stuck together because Funk was wrapped in wire as well so they get back in the ring in a big ball and Sabu gets two. They’re still stuck together and since there’s nothing else they can do, Sabu shoves Terry’s shoulder back down and gets the pin and the title.

Rating: D-. To the shock of no one who is paying attention, this was a major mess. It was a total freakshow and the ending made it even worse as they couldn’t even do the right ending because they got stuck. Also this would wind up meaning NOTHING as Douglas got the title a week later because in ECW, Shane Douglas MUST be world champion. Just a mess here and it had almost absolutely nothing to do with wrestling.

Here’s a hardcore dream match from Terry Funk’s Wrestlefest. Yeah it happened before but it still sounds cool.

Sabu vs. Mankind

This is old school Mankind with the brown leather vest I guess you would call it. He had been Dude Love around this time so this was a quick change. Its Foley so I cant complain. This should be pretty decent. They mention RVD losing to Dory Funk Jr. Dark match or not on the DVD I guess. Yep based on some other reviews, that match did happen just before this one.

No clue where it is but whatever. Sabu hits a nice spin kick to get us to the floor followed by a nice plancha. Weve got a chair in there now. What took him so long? Foley tries to do his head in the ropes spot but it doesnt work as the ropes here suck. Sabu sets up a table between the ring and the rail. Its weird hearing Styles talk about Mankind. There goes the table.

Foley loses his mask. The triple jump hits and I think Foley drops an F Bomb but gives his way of jabbering it likely wasnt. Foley wakes up and just goes off on Sabu and hits the Double Arm DDT and does some Cactus Jack mannerisms. Fonzie, Sabu and the referee get the Claw but the bell has already rung. The announcer says its a DQ. Screw telling us who won or anything. Not important. Joey points out that Foley would win because Fonzie ran in.

Rating: C-. Solid brawl here as Sabu wasnt as insane as normal so this was far better. When hes calmer hes much more watchable. Foley was his usual great self here. Putting these two in a brawl is a recipe for awesome so this worked fine other than the cheap ending.

Back to ECW for a showdown with Sabu’s partner.

TV Title: Sabu vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam is defending and Jeff Jones is refereeing, making things even crazier. Feeling out process to start with Sabu diving for Rob’s leg but only hitting the mat. Van Dam misses a spin kick and flips Sabu over into a standoff. Rob grabs a mic and says he isn’t going to fight his partner and friend. Jones says the match has to happen and Sabu goes after the champion with a springboard kick to the face. A slingshot legdrop gets two and Rob heads outside, only to be taken down by a dive from Sabu.

Back in and Sabu puts on a camel clutch but Van Dam is quickly in the ropes. Both guys flip over the others’ back and then dropkick each others’ knee. Rob takes over and puts on a quickly broken surfboard before putting the boots to Sabu. The hold has hurt Sabu’s leg so Rob puts on a half crab. A superkick puts Sabu down and it’s time for a table. Rob bridges it between the ring and apron but Sabu dives through the ropes to take out the champion.

Sabu puts him on the table but Van Dam bails into the crowd. That’s fine with Sabu as he dives off the table and onto Rob in a big crash. They slug it out on the floor until Rob puts him on the barricade for a Van Daminator. Alfonso wouldn’t hold the chair so Rob kicks the chair into Sabu’s face himself. Sabu comes back by blocking a suplex and crotching Rob on the barricade as well before taking him down with an Asai moonsault.

That’s only good for two back inside so Sabu throws a chair at the downed Van Dam. The Triple Jump Moonsault misses and Alfonso pats Van Dam on the back. A slingshot kick to the face puts Sabu outside again and Rob hits a big flip dive to take him out. Back in and Sabu blocks a suplex from the ring through a table at ringside before suplexing him back inside.

The table is bridged between the ring and barricade but Van Dam quickly stands up after being put on the table. Sabu tries a springboard DDT through the table but the table doesn’t break and they fall off to the side. It doesn’t look like the most painful move so Van Dam being back on his feet is acceptable. The partially broken table is set up inside the ring and Sabu hurricanranas Van Dam through the wood. Since this is ECW, Rob is right back up and in control less than a minute later.

Rob puts the chair on Sabu’s face and drops a top rope leg onto him but falls to the floor in pain as a result. Sabu puts Van Dam on the barricade and hurricanranas him down to the floor. Back in and Rob snaps off a Van Daminator. The frog splash gets two more and Sabu is literally throwing a chair at Van Dam’s head eight seconds later. A triple jump legdrop crushes Van Dam for two but Rob pops up and monkey flips Sabu onto the chair.

An Arabian Facebuster to the back of Rob’s head gets no cover and Sabu brings in a table. It breaks before he can set it up so Rob kicks Sabu onto the broken table, drawing booing from the fans. Van Dam brings in a fresh table and kicks Sabu onto it for a HUGE frog splash….for two. Naturally Sabu is right back up with a flip legdrop and a German suplex for two but Rob comes back with the split legged moosault. It’s another near fall though so Sabu pops up with a springboard moonsault for two of his own. Time runs out and it’s a draw.

Rating: D+. This is the kind of stuff that makes pure wrestling fans hate ECW. It’s not about the tables and the chairs and the violence. It’s about the complete lack of selling of ANY of these moves. Both guys were hitting big moves to each other but they would pop up a few seconds after taking one and act like it was a mild annoyance. No one stayed down in this entire thing, no one ever had a lengthy advantage and no one ever had any psychology at all. I guess you could say the story is they’re equally matched, but when you’re equal at being really bad at something it doesn’t look good.

The match was exciting to a degree because of all the high spots, but there was stuff in here that neither guy should have been able to kick out of. I wasn’t skipping stuff between the spots either. They were just popping up that quickly. It eventually desensitizes the fans because the big moves don’t mean anything, so why should they care when either guy hits another big spot? The problem is this was a staple of ECW and would become a bigger and bigger problem over the years. Jeff Jones wasn’t a factor in the match at all.

Now they’re partners again at Heat Wave 1998.

Tag Team Titles: Jinsei Shinzaki/Hayabusa vs. Rob Van Dam/Sabu

Van Dam and Sabu are defending. Shinzaki is better known as Hakushi in the WWF. Jinsei is known for having Japanese symbols drawn all over his torso, back and face. Neither team can agree on who is going to start. It’s finally down to Van Dam vs. Hayabusa. They circle each other for a minute to start until Rob leg trips him. That goes nowhere so Alfonso gets up on the apron and blows his whistle a lot. Van Dam takes Hayabusa down with a Japanese armdrag and poses.

Back up and Hayabusa kicks Rob in the leg, draws in Sabu and tags in Jinsei for a Vader Bomb and two. Van Dam comes back with a kick to the face but walks into an enziguri to the back of the head. Jinsei walks across the top rope (think Undertaker’s Old School though he walks around a corner and keeps going) and chops Rob in the head but misses a knee drop.

Sabu comes in with a slingshot legdrop for two and we hit the chinlock. Back up and Hayabusa comes in off a tag but gets dropkicked in the knee. A slingshot splash gets two for Sabu but he walks into a nice dropkick, sending him running to the floor. He comes back in and takes out Hayabusa’s knee again before putting on something like an ankle lock. Hayabusa gets to the ropes so Sabu puts on a camel clutch.

Van Dam comes in and dropkicks Hayabusa while he’s still in the clutch, so Shinzaki hits a springboard missile dropkick to take Van Dam down. Sabu is sent to the floor as well so Hayabusa nails a big springboard moonsault to take them out. Van Dam and the challengers fight into the crowd so Sabu hits a big dive to take all three out. Hayabusa is draped over the barricade for a spinning kick to the back.

In the ring, Sabu dropkicks Jinsei’s knee, setting up a surfboard from Van Dam. Sabu adds a top rope chair shot to the ribs for two. Hayabusa comes back in for a double bulldog on Van Dam followed by a springboard swanton bomb from Hayabusa and a springboard knee drop from Shinzaki. Sabu makes a save and Van Dam kicks Hayabusa’s head off for two. Everything breaks down and Sabu is superkicked into a German suplex for two. Rob’s top rope spinning splash gets another near fall on Jinsei as the guys are getting tired.

Jinsei powerbombs Van Dam down and Hayabusa nails a 450 but Sabu dives in for a save. A rolling splash/legdrop combination gets two on Hayabusa and a Boston crab/legdrop combination gets the same on Shinzaki. Sabu brings in a table but gets taken down by a top rope shoulder, giving Jinsei two. Van Dam’s knee gets twisted but is still able to go up top for a Van Daminator to a crotched Hayabusa.

Jinsei twists Van Dam’s knee again but the table collapses under Van Dam’s weight. Hayabusa’s top rope splash gets two and two more tables are sent in. Sabu hits an Arabian facebuster on Hayabusa and Jinsei takes a Van Daminator. The challengers are put on a table and a top rope splash from Van Dam/a top rope legdrop from Sabu at the same time give Sabu the pin on Shinzaki.

Rating: B-. The tables at the end drag this down. They’re just not needed to make the match work as everything was clicking without them. The chairs weren’t too bad but the rest of it didn’t work. I liked the wrestling stuff a lot better than the brawling but that’s the general rule of thumb for ECW. The problem was after the tagging ends, it’s your standard ECW brawl. This show has been very good so far though and the match was definitely good.

Taz would break Sabu’s neck but intentionally give him the FTW Title. This set up a title vs. title match at Living Dangerously 1999.

ECW World Title/FTW Title: Taz vs. Sabu

Winner take all. Sabu has a broken jaw coming in and is the FTW Champion. Taz’s jaws are fine, though he has a biceps injury as he comes in as ECW Champion. Taz says we should make this falls count anywhere to give the fans something special. Sabu is fine with that and takes Taz down by the leg to start. Taz can’t hook a German suplex as Sabu grabs a rope and tries an armbar. That’s fine with Taz as he puts on a headscissors but they roll into the ropes.

Now we get violent as Taz hammers on the broken jaw and hits a Brooklyn Boot (just a running boot) to the jaw. It doesn’t have much effect as Sabu hits a springboard leg lariat and a slingshot flipping legdrop for two. We get our first chair for Air Sabu and Taz bails to the floor. Sabu baseball slides him into the crowd and tries the big springboard dive, only to have Taz get a chair up just in time.

They fight into the crowd and as usual it’s a lot of walking around without a lot of brawling. Sabu nails Taz with a chair but Taz doesn’t seem to notice. They get back to the barricade and turn over a lot of chairs before Sabu goes to the ramp for another dive back into the audience for two. Both guys get back onto the ramp but Taz throws Sabu back into the crowd. That doesn’t go anywhere so it’s back to the ring.

Sabu takes out Taz’s knee and bridges a table between the ring and barricade. They slug it out in the ring until Taz grabs a belly to belly overhead Tazplex to send Sabu through the table, taking out a camera in the process. Sabu gets dropped face first onto the barrcade and the jaw comes back into play. Taz yells about Flair and Hogan as he hammers on Sabu. That earns him a chair upside his head but Alfonso wants to throw in a towel and end the match.

Taz won’t let that happen though and sends Alfonso backing up the ramp. He throws Sabu off the ramp again so Alfonso throws a chair at Taz. It buys Sabu a breather and he comes back with a Fameasser in the ring for two. We hit the camel clutch as Sabu is bleeding from the mouth. He lets go of the hold less than five seconds after putting it on and gets another table. Taz puts him on the table but Sabu turns it over and hits a middle rope hurricanrana for two. Another hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb to put both guys down.

Back to the floor again with Sabu putting Taz on yet another table. He goes to bridge a table over the barricade but Taz is back up and takes it back inside. Sabu tries a slingshot powerbomb to the floor but hits his feet on the barricade so they stop suddenly and Taz has no impact coming down. He sells it anyway and is laid on the table over the barricade so Sabu can hit a big splash off the top. That’s only good for two as well so Sabu takes it back inside for an Arabian Facebuster and another near fall as Taz puts his foot on the ropes. That shouldn’t count in a falls count anywhere match and the fans let the referee know.

Taz comes back with a pumphandle Tazplex for two of his own but Sabu is up first with a chair to the face. The Triple Jump Moonsault gets two more and a springboard legdrop gets the same. A head and arms Tazplex gets two and Sabu tries to set up another table. It’s laid in the corner for a dragon Tazplex, the same move that broke Sabu’s neck. Naturally, it’s only good for two here. Alfonso throws in the towel but it doesn’t count for some reason. Instead Taz puts on the Tazmission and Sabu passes out to make Taz undisputed champion.

Rating: D. More than anything else, this felt really long. It’s basically the same match they’ve had every time and all the chairs and tables get really old after awhile. I’ve seen Sabu keep things toned down and have entertaining matches but that’s not what we’ve gotten from him in ECW so far. This would be the end of the FTW Title and more or less the end of Taz vs. Sabu.

Here’s a one off match from November to Remember 1999.

Sabu vs. Chris Candido

There’s no story mentioned here if one exists. Tammy is back with Candido who just recently returned from injury. Sabu dives at Candido to start but only hits mat. They slug it out with Chris being knocked out to the floor, only to come back in and get punched some more. Sabu’s springboard kick to the face is caught in a belly to back suplex for two but a HUGE backdrop sends Candido back to the floor.

Sabu nails a big dive over the top to take Candido down again but they’re quickly back inside with Candido hitting a delayed vertical suplex. A middle rope legdrop gets two for Chris but he misses a swan dive. Sabu gets a chair for the Triple Jump Legdrop and two more. Now a table is bridged between the apron and barricade but Candido dives on Sabu as he’s setting it up. Back in and Sabu nails a top rope hurricanrana for two and Sabu before he goes after the Candido’s spine.

We hit the camel clutch but Candido breaks it up in just a few seconds. Sabu is laid on a table but Candido misses a top rope legdrop and drives himself through the wood. Some kicks to the leg have Candido in even more trouble and it’s back to the camel clutch. Again the hold doesn’t last long before Air Sabu connects in the corner and Candido falls face first onto the chair. Chris gets kicked out to the floor again, setting up a HUGE springboard dive from Sabu into the crowd.

They brawl further into the audience but are quickly back to ringside with Sabu in control. Another chair is thrown in and Sabu nails a top rope splash for two. Back to the camel clutch but Sabu lets go of it again after about five seconds. He takes too long setting up a table which falls over almost immediately. Sabu lays Candido on the half set table for a top rope legdrop and two.

The Triple Jump Moonsault misses and Candido gets two each off a powerbomb and piledriver. A superplex gets another near fall on Sabu and Candido sets up a chair for no apparent reason. Sabu comes out of the corner and uses the chair as a springboard for a clothesline. Tammy crotches Sabu on the top and Candido nails a great looking to rope hurricanrana.

A second swan dive and piledriver both connect but Candido gets a table instead of covering. Sabu is right back up and puts Candido on the table as Tammy interferes again. Candido gets up but Alfonso puts Tammy on the table. Chris dives on Tammy as Sabu jumps through the table, followed by a top rope Arabian Facebuster and the camel clutch to give Sabu the submission.

Rating: D+. This was WAY too long at nearly eighteen minutes. Candido was doing everything he could but Sabu was all table and chairs with some dives in between. The camel clutch being broken only a few seconds after it was applied got annoying fast. There was an attempt at some psychology but the match completely broke down at about the halfway point. This was one of Candido’s last appearances as he would wrestle a few times on ECW on TNN before heading to WCW early in the new year.

After ECW went under, Sabu was one of many wrestlers to go to the WWA promotion. Here he is at the Reckoning.

Sabu vs. Joe E. Legend

Shane jumps in on commentary to further annoy me. Legend quickly takes it to the mat into a headscissors before we get to the insane stuff. Joe wins a quick slugout and chokes in the corner but gets caught in a springboard tornado DDT for two. We head to the floor for a flip dive by Sabu before Legend stomps away back inside. They head back outside for a big springboard dive from Sabu as Shane blames Sabu for killing ECW.

We get our first table brought in but Legend runs him over with a clothesline before it could be set up. Sabu is busted open as Legend spears him into the barricade. Some right hands have no effect on Joe so he gets two off a big boot to the face back inside. We hit the chinlock until Legend kicks a chair into Sabu’s back for no cover. Sabu pelts the chair into Joe’s face and an Arabian facebuster with the chair gets two.

There’s the camel clutch on Legend but Joe gets to the ropes pretty quickly. Legend comes back with a northern lights suplex as the fans want the table. Joe is sent to the apron and knocked over the table so we can brawl on the floor a bit. That goes nowhere so Joe takes him back inside and gets two off a powerbomb. Sabu crotches him on the top and hooks a top rope rana for two. Joe avoids a top rope splash and kicks Sabu in the head for two. A chokeslam powerbomb gets two on Sabu but the fans still want the table.

Legend’s Vader Bomb only hits chair and an Arabian Press gets two. Air Sabu is caught in a fireman’s carry drop sending Sabu face first onto the chair. Sabu finally puts him on the table and the triple jump legdrop sends Legend through it to pop the crowd. Back in and the chair is pelted into Legend’s face again before going up top. After breaking up a superplex attempt, the top rope Arabian Facebuster is good for the pin.

Rating: D. This wasn’t terrible but it was LONG, running nearly 18 minutes, or a lot longer than any Sabu match should last. Legend was decent enough but he isn’t the most exciting guy in the world. All the fans wanted to see was Sabu put someone through a table so the match could have ended after that point. Not bad, but WAY too long.

Off to TNA, starting as Weekly PPV #6.

NWA World Title: Sabu vs. Ken Shamrock

This a ladder/submission match, which is exactly what it sounds like. After a LONG recap of last week’s ladder match with Sabu vs. Malice, we’re ready to go. The fans seem to be completely behind Sabu here. Shamrock controls to start and goes for a leg hold but Sabu makes the rope. Sabu gets a quick rollup for two so the rules are basically thrown out the window so far. Apparently security has walked out of the building. Not like it makes a difference or anything.

Shamrock grabs an armbar but Sabu gets out before it can go on full. Sabu actually tries a leg lock but Shamrock is like boy please and counters into a leg bar. The springboard leg lariat takes Shamrock down and the slingshot legdrop looks to set up an armbar. I don’t think the pins count anymore. Apparently Ricky Steamboat is in charge next week.

Sabu gets knocked to the floor and we get the first ladder brought in with like four minutes left. The ladder gets kicked into Sabu’s face before it gets into the ring. Sabu and Shamrock brawl up the ramp with Sabu being through into one of the mini cages near the stage. Sabu is busted open but he manages to send Shamrock into the barricade.

It’s table time but the springboard flip dive by Sabu misses Shamrock, sending Sabu through the table on the ramp. Cool looking dive though. FINALLY a ladder is brought in but as Shamrock goes up, Malice runs in and chokeslams him down. Malice gets the belt itself and leaves to end the show.

Rating: D. Other than a few spots from Sabu, this was really boring. They had a no contest in a ladder match. That’s hard to do but they managed to do it here. Shamrock is a really boring champion but thankfully he’ll only have the title for a few more weeks. This is the last match Sabu would have with the company for almost a year and it’s a shame he couldn’t go out on the one he had last week which was way better.

And again at Weekly PPV #89.

Sabu vs. Monty Brown

From April 14, 2004 and this is under hardcore rules. For you old guys, Brown is basically an intelligent Ahmed Johnson but about 10 years older. Sabu tries to jump Brown but gets sent into the corner with ease and pummeled like he stole something. Brown sends him into the ropes but gets caught in a springboard tornado DDT for two. A quick arm tie neckbreaker gives Brown control again but Sabu comes right back with a springboard middle rope huricanrana for another near fall.

It’s already chair time with Sabu pelting it at Brown’s head and staying there in a great visual. A stiff right hand sets up an overhead double underhook suplex from Monty but he takes too long going to the middle rope. Brown comes back again with hard right hands to the face and ribs. He wasn’t all that well rounded at this point if you didn’t notice. The Pounce (basically a hard shoulder block/spear) sends Sabu flying through the ropes and out to the floor.

That’s fine with him as he’s able to pull out a table, only to have Brown punch him in the face yet again. Sabu rams him face first into the table and hits a springboard dive to take Monty down. Another chair is pelted at Brown’s head for two (remember falls count anywhere) but he easily whips Sabu into the crowd. Brown hits a series of backbreakers across his knee before throwing Sabu into a pile of chairs.

A third chair is pelted at Monty’s head and Sabu drags a table out from behind the stands. They head into the locker room but Sabu comes flying back out. Abyss walks through the door before powerbombing Sabu through the table. Brown comes out of the locker room and squares off with Abyss but some dark haired chick comes out to calm Abyss down and take him away. A quick Pounce ends Sabu.

Rating: D+. This was just there to get a hardcore match on the set. Brown was a guy that seemed to have a ton of potential and would have been great as an over the top Scott Steiner style character. He never got pushed to the top though and I can see why that never happened. Sabu was his usual self here.

Sabu would head to the WWE for the ECW reunion show One Night Stand 2005.

Sabu vs. Rhyno

Yep it’s chair time early and Rhyno gets popped with it. I usually hate these things, but even I’m not stupid enough to think they meant nothing at all. Sabu is dominating this for the most part and it’s not as bad as I expected it to be actually. There’s not much to say about this.

The referee takes a gore and here’s Van Dam again. He gets the Chair Surf which is a move I’ve always liked. Yep it’s table time as it’s a Sabu match so there we are. Something that was supposed to be an Arabian SkullCrusher doesn’t work as I think the chair gets away from Sabu but it could have been worse I guess.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t much. Like I said though it could have been far worse though as they had Sabu keep the weapons toned down here so that’s all fine and good. Far from great but these three had to be on the show somewhere. Sabu wouldn’t stick around or anything but there wasn’t anything for him to do at this point.

It’s back to TNA, starting with Unbreakable.

Sabu vs. Abyss

James Mitchell wants to make it No DQ and of course it is. Sabu fires away with right hands but they have next to no effect. Abyss throws him around but Sabu keeps coming, likely due to his history of head trauma. A big boot puts Sabu down but he keeps coming back with chops. The fans want tables less than two minutes into the match. Does foreplay mean nothing to these people?

Instead Sabu gets a chair and pounds away with it, including hitting an Arabian Facebuster with it for two. A clothesline puts both of them on the floor and there’s the table. That one is broken though (as in it broke while he was setting it up) so Abyss sets up one of his own. Sabu uses the distraction to hit a flip dive over the top rope and out onto Abyss. They head back in and Sabu charges straight into a backdrop through the two tables at ringside. That’s a bad stretch of luck for him there.

Abyss sets up a table in the ring but takes FOREVER to do it, allowing Sabu to come back with chair shots to the head. Now the fans want thumbtacks. These people are never satisfied. Sabu goes up top with the chair and drives Abyss through the table for three, but Mitchell puts Abyss’ foot on the rope. You know, because in a match based on pure carnage, a foot on the rope is good enough to break it up.

Abyss goes under the ring and gets the tacks which are spread on the mat. They take turns teasing going into the tacks for a bit until Sabu whacks Abyss with a chair. That gets nowhere so Sabu springboards into a Black Hole Slam onto the tacks for the pin with no feet on the ropes this time.

Rating: C+. It’s Abyss vs. Sabu in a hardcore match. What else were you expecting here? They beat on each other with weapons for awhile, Sabu got thrown around a lot, Abyss got hit in the head with a lot of stuff, and someone got thrown into the tacks. What else were you expecting here? The match was just ok but eventually they would have a solid hardcore match with barbed wire everywhere which was a lot better.

Time for some violence at Turning Point 2005.

Abyss vs. Sabu

This is barbed wire massacre, which means the ropes are replaced by barbed wire, which Abyss is terrified of. Abyss stomps on the chair that Sabu tries to bring in with him, so Sabu gets a barbed wire ball bat to scare Abyss away. Sabu tries to drive him into the wire but settles for a chair shot instead. Another doesn’t put Abyss down so he launches himself off the chair into a powerbomb position.

That gets Abyss down but he launches Sabu into the wire which draws a big gasp from the crowd. Sabu comes back with some punches but his cross body is caught and Abyss drops him throat first onto the wire. Sabu has a spike of some sort which he jabs into the shoulder of the monster, drawing blood. He tries another move off the chair but launches himself into the wire AGAIN. Dude, IT ISN’T WORKING FOR YOU!

With Sabu still tied up in the wire, Abyss charges but gets caught in a drop toehold into the wire. A chair shot gets two for Sabu. Abyss shrugs that off and chokeslams him onto a chair for two. Mitchell throws in a barbed wire covered chair and for SOME REASON, he tries an Earthquake onto it. The wire goes into Abyss’ crotch and I cringe a bit. That chair goes onto Abyss’ head twice and down he goes.

Abyss rolls to the floor so Sabu hits a huge flip dive over the wire to take Abyss out. Sabu throws a barbed wire board into the ring but gets draped over the wire stomach first. Back inside now and Abyss sets for a chokeslam onto the board, but Sabu bites the fingers to escape. Sabu winds up being launched into the air and landing stomach first on the wire. Abyss brings in another wire covered board and puts it in the corner. Due to the laws of wrestling, his charge misses and he gets all stuck in the wire. Sabu kicks Abyss down onto the other board into a sandwich, then drops a leg onto the top board for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m not sure what to call this. For the violence and shock value it was fine, but as far as wrestling goes there was nothing here. Thankfully this was the ending to this feud which went on for months on end. The ending spot was pretty awesome but most of this was just a total freak show. They had to do this first too because of the ropes, which is annoying but there was no way around that.

With another ECW reunion show coming, Sabu would head back to WWE for a few shows, starting with One Night Stand 2006.

Smackdown World Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Sabu

Rey is booed out of the freaking building. Naturally he’s only the World Champion here instead of the World Heavyweight Champion because that’s how they roll here. This is under extreme rules, like every other match here should be but of course isn’t because that’s not the WWE way. Rey has a chair during the big match intros. Sabu grabs one before the bell and the fans are totally behind Sabu. Joey: “Mixed reaction here for Rey.” Taz: “Nah they’re booing him.”

After some basic wrestling stuff they duel with the chairs and guess who wins that. Air Sabu in the corner but Rey gets a drop toehold to break up the Triple Jump Moonsault. 619 misses and you would think Rey had just banned rainbows. BIG chair shot sends Rey to the floor and the brawl is on. It’s table time with the table set up as a bridge between the ring and the railing.

Rey is placed on it but moves as Sabu starts setting up. Sabu gets sent into the steps and a moonsault press gets two for Rey. Camel clutch by Sabu which draws a Sheik chant. Naturally he lets it go to grab a table. Arabian Facebuster has Rey in trouble as he left the table on the floor. Table is set up in front of the aisle but Rey knocks him onto it and hits a seated senton through it to put both guys down in the aisle.

Sabu’s arm is messed up and Rey tries something like Air Sabu in the corner but Sabu gets out of the way and hits a springboard leg lariat to take Rey down. Triple Jump Moonsault gets a close two. It was more like a knee drop to the face but close enough. Sabu gets all ticked off and pelts the chair at the head of Rey to take him down. Onto the bridged table from earlier and a big front flip dive over the top through the table takes both guys out. And here are some suits to say that they can’t continue and we’re done. I’ll spare you a very long rant about how stupid this is.

Rating: C+. This would have been higher if this had a finish. Rey wasn’t used to being hated like this so they went against it for the sake of having a decent match. That being said, taking the superhero out of the match in case it got too extreme is incredibly stupid. Oh screw it. Here’s that rant I mentioned.

This is the first shot to killing ECW. Let’s take a look at some of Sabu’s more famous stuff. He’s ripped open a bicep and glued it back together to continue a match. He’s had to be cut out of barbed wire after winning a match. He’s been set on fire. He’s been put through more tables than you can count. He’s been beaten up, stomped on, kicked, smacked around, choked out and everything else you can think of, but here he can’t continue because of going through a single table.

Just think about that for a minute. How weak does that make him look? The old grizzled hero of the people now can’t take a single shot through a table by doctors’ orders. How many times do you remember a doctor being around in ECW? The very idea of a DQ in ECW was blasphemy. You can see right here how it’s a WWE show and not an ECW show at all.

This would be a sign of things to come for the company as I’ sure you remember the Zombie being on the first show on Sci-Fi. Yes, as in a dead guy that craves human flesh. It’s as stupid as it sounds. Anyway, ECW was dead and the proof should have started right here. Stupid moment as even Rey winning on a fluke pin would have made more sense here. Just terribly stupid and a way to make ECW look weak from the get go.

Anyway take a guess as to how the fans take this one. The replay shows that it was more or less a jumping DDT to Rey so he should be hurt a good deal worse.

Time for what was called a dream match from Vengeance 2006.

John Cena vs. Sabu

This is an EXTREME LUMBERJACK MATCH which sounds like something off a bad video game. The lumberjacks are Viscera, Trevor Murdoch, Lance Cade, Rob Conway, Snitsky, Matt Striker, Charlie Haas, Val Venis, Tommy Dreamer, Balls Mahoney, Stevie Richards, Little Guido Maritato, Roadkill, Danny Doring, Justin Credible, Al Snow, and The Sandman. Let’s get this over with. Matt Striker pretending to be a wrestler is so cute.

This whole show needs to end like NOW. Cena gets a very mixed reaction to put it mildly. Of course the lumberjacks get in a big showdown and Cena has a black eye from Sabu from Monday. The lumberjacks do their usual thing as I wonder what the point of a lumberjack match is. Were there ever lumberjacks used for one? This turns into a contest of who can throw the other person to the floor the most.

Cena takes a cane shot from Sandman and Sabu hits the Triple Jump as he becomes an Olympian apparently. He hooks that horrible looking one armed camel clutch of his as Cena makes his comeback. And a low blow stops that. Lawler HATES ECW. That’s an understatement if there ever was one. The big fight finally breaks out so Cena goes to the floor and hits an FU on Richards to put him in the crowd. Sabu throws a chair at Cena and it wraps around his head in a cool visual.

Cena pelts it at Sabu and hits an FU over the top through a table. When I say through I mean Sabu hits the edge of the table and looks like he broke his back. He taps to the STFU to just further bury ECW as this wasn’t even 7 minutes.

Rating: D. What a mess this was. I have no idea what the point of this was other than to just get Cena on the card somehow. This wasn’t any good at all and I can’t really blame Sabu for it as this was going to be bad no matter who was in it. I’m still trying to get the point of this and I think it’s in vain.

Sabu would be one of the early big stars on the new ECW. Here’s one of his big matches at Summerslam 2006.

ECW Title: Big Show vs. Sabu

Big Show is defending after Sabu beat Van Dam in a ladder match this past week. It’s extreme rules, which is a rarity for these title matches anymore. Sabu starts fast by swinging a chair and gets a quick one count off the Arabian Facebuster. The chair is set up in the middle of the ring but Big Show drops Sabu face first onto the steel. Big Show crushes the chair with his boot and chops Sabu down with ease.

We hit an early bearhug but Sabu pokes the eyes to escape. A springboard is caught in a fallaway slam from Big Show to send Sabu to the outside. The small one grabs a chair to blast Show in the face before dropkicking it into Show’s face. Sabu it too banged up to immediately cover so it’s only a one count. With nothing else working, Sabu loads up a table in the corner and hits a tornado DDT for no cover.

Sabu finally knocks him through the table off a springboard from the chair but Show pops up and electric chairs Sabu down. A Vader Bomb crushes Sabu and Show brings in two sets of steps. He bridges a table across them but his chokeslam is countered into a DDT through the table. Sabu sets up another table but charges into a chokeslam through it for the pin.

Rating: D. I don’t care. Seriously that’s the first thing that came to my head. This was less than nine minutes and the ending was never in double at all. At least a third of the match was spent setting up the next spot, especially near the end. The early days of WWECW with the old ECW guys were just torture to get through as it was clearly trying to recreate magic and it wasn’t anything of note. Dull match here and it would be several months before ECW picked up.

Sabu would join the ECW Originals in their war with the New Breed at Wrestlemania XXIII.

New Breed vs. ECW Originals

It’s Elijah Burke/Matt Striker/Kevin Thron/Marcus Cor Van vs. Rob Van Dam/Tommy Dreamer/Sabu and for no reason whatsoever this is a regular eight man tag instead of the Extreme Rules match we would get on ECW a few days later. Striker starts with Sabu and Matt is in early trouble. It’s quickly off to Sandman vs. Burke but before Sandy does much he brings in Dreamer. Cor Von hits Dreamer in the back and comes in to pound away a bit.

It’s quickly back to Burke (the New Breed’s leader and more famous as D’Angelo Dinero) for the running knees to the back for two. Thorn comes in to crush Dreamer into the corner and put on a chinlock. Back up and a sitout powerbomb gets two for Thorn and here’s Cor Von again. Burke comes in as well but Dreamer takes them down with a simultaneous neckbreaker/reverse DDT combo. The hot tag brings in Van Dam and there’s the top rope kick to Thorn. Rolling Thunder lands on Striker as everything breaks down. With everyone else on the floor, Van Dam Five Stars Striker for the pin.

Rating: D+. Seriously, why wasn’t this the Extreme Rules match? The whole point of ECW is to be extreme but we got a seven minute tag match which went nowhere at all. The theory was to finally let these guys get on Wrestlemania, but Van Dam had been on it before and won a title here. Nothing to see here at all.

After a few years on the indies, Sabu would head to TNA for Hardcore Justice 2010 and a rematch with his old rival and partner.

Sabu vs. Rob Van Dam

It’s 10:15 so hopefully we’re out before half past the hour. Other than that this is going to go WAY too long. Fonzie is in a yellow jacket and RVD comes out first. The fans say this is classic. Sabu is bald. They start out with a feeling out process because they know each other so well. Sabu does his point to the sky and RVD does his pointing. It would be nice if they actually did something.

In an interesting thing Fonzie sends a chair in but does it right down the middle. We hit the crowd for a bit as the chanting is just idiotic. Sabu botches….something and then the camel clutch is on. The bald guy doesn’t look half bad all things considered. With both guys down, Fonzie throws both of them a bottle of water. Both get tables as a result. Oh this isn’t going to end well.

Van Dam hits some slingshot legdrops and Fonzie tries to revive Sabu. Sabu hits a rana to send RVD into a chair in the middle of the ring. It looked totally fake but not bad at the same time. Clutch is on again for like 2 seconds. Triple Jump Moonsault is blocked by Van Dam and Sabu is bleeding from somewhere. Van Assassin hits (the one footed dropkick into the chair while the guy is crotched) and Sabu to the floor. Ok so that lasts like a second and we’re back now. Morrison, watch an RVD match to see how you do the split legged moonsault, I beg of you. Rolling Thunder to the chair hits for two. Five Star ends it.

Rating: D+. While a mess, this is what it was supposed to be: a war. They beat each other up and it really isn’t as bad as anyone is saying it is. It’s bad, but this is what the match was supposed to be. There was no way it was going to be a classic, but this really wasn’t horrible. It held my attention for the most part and had some decent spots. For the ending to this show, this was bearable.

We’ll wrap it up with Sabu getting a title shot at No Surrender 2010.

X Division Title: Sabu vs. Douglas Williams

They say that this is the only singles title match tonight, which means the TV Title still isn’t on the line, which is a good thing. These X Factor things are again annoying. We get all these things already but we need a Powerpoint presentation to tell us them again? The Bombay, Michigan thing always makes me chuckle. Williams out moves Sabu to start as Sabu isn’t sure what to do here.

He’s one of those guys that can be decent in the ring but when he gets bad he gets really bad. It depends on how insane he goes I guess. We start on the mat a lot which is a nice change of pace. Slingshot legdrop is kind of a slingshot double boot as it sets up the one arm camel clutch. That name always makes me chuckle.

A table is set up at ringside but we get into the ring before it can be used. The fans of course aren’t happy about us sticking to actual wrestling. Taz talks about his rivalry with Sabu, which is a good thing. I’ve long since thought Lawler needs to remind fans that he used to be a wrestler and even a world champion. Most young fans probably don’t know that and it probably would give him credibility.

Sabu brings in a chair but does nothing with it again. Triple jump moonsault is just barely ok as it gets two. Loud Sabu chant which will be validation to keep him around according to Dixie. We hit the mat again and Williams uses some insane spinning chinlock. This hasn’t been great but it’s no trainwreck at all. Sabu goes No Mercy with a springboard back elbow. Williams kicks the chair into Sabu’s balls and gets a gutwrench suplex for two.

Sabu goes for a big assisted dive but can’t quite get it so he just jumps, and I use that word loosely, over the top. Williams is put on the table but Sabu goes through it instead. Was there a point to that being in the match at all? I mean what did that add at all? Hebner tries to get rid of the chair, allowing a belt shot to the head of Sabu to make Williams retain. Well at least he kept the belt.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t bad really. It’s no classic or anything, but this was much better than I was expecting. Sabu didn’t go completely insane and as usual, it was far better that way. Williams definitely should have won and thankfully he did. This was definitely a passable match and a nice surprise in a way.

Sabu is a guy who was very different when he got started and influenced a lot of wrestlers over the years. The problem is that he’s very much like Vince Russo: when you can keep him on a leash and keep him under control, he can be very entertaining. When he goes nuts, everything falls apart and the guy is a disaster. He’s screwed up some things in wrestling, but there are far worse people to watch.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – September 21: Curtis Hughes

Today is a guy that found a character and ran with it for his entire career: Curtis Hughes.

Hughes got started in 1988 in the indies before making it to WCW as the generic monster Big Cat. We’ll pick things up at Clash of the Champions XIII.

Big Cat vs. Brad Armstrong

Big Cat is a large muscular man who would eventually become a bodyguard named Mr. Hughes. He wants Lex Luger in the near future. Cat runs Armstrong over with a shoulder and Brad isn’t sure what to do with him. Brad scores with a quick dropkick but runs into a backbreaker with two more thrown in as a bonus. Another hard shoulder block puts Brad on the mat and we hit the bearhug. That goes nowhere so Cat picks Brad up in Luger’s Torture Rack for the win via referee stoppage.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here to set up the Big Cat vs. Luger match. Cat had a good look and a lot of power but he felt like a monster of the month for Luger or Sting to vanquish down the line. It wasn’t a bad match and it did its job well enough, but there’s only so much quality you can pack into a four minute squash.

Hughes and his buddy Motor City Madman made the mistake of ticking off Sid Vicious. Here’s his punishment at Starrcade 1990.

Motor City Madman/Big Cat vs. Skyscrapers

The Skyscrapers are Sid Vicious, a Horseman at the moment, and Dan Spivey, who are two monsters who liked to destroy people. The Madman and Big Cat went after Sid on a recent Clash of the Champions, so tonight it’s a reunion with Spivey to hurt the annoying guys. It’s a big brawl to start with the Madman being sent to the apron. A double backdrop puts Cat down and a double powerbomb ends the Madman after about a minute. Total and complete domination here.

He would get a shot at the meaningless Six Man Tag Team Titles at WrestleWar 1991.

Six Man Tag Titles: Junkyard Dog/Ricky Morton/Tommy Rich vs. Stage Patrol/Big Cat

Where do I even start? Ok so odds are you haven’t heard of these titles before, and there’s a good reason for that: they were only around for less than nine months. The titles were first won seven days before this show at a live event. Now one might ask why they didn’t have the first champions crowned here on PPV. It’s WCW in 1991. There’s your answer and it’ll answer most of your questions. The State Patrol is Sgt. Buddy Lee Parker and Lt. James Earl Wright, who is most famous for being one half of the State Patrol. Big Cat is Mr. Hughes and he’s one of the challengers here.

Cat and Dog start things off. I think you can see JYD’s gut expanding from here. He hits Cat with some headbutts and it’s off to Morton and Wright. Morton speeds things up with armdrags and it’s off to Rich. Rich slams him down and hooks an armdrag followed by an armbar. Off to Parker who gets the exact same treatment. Back to Morton for some atomic drops and then back to the same armbar again.

The Dog comes back in to crank up the fat levels of this match. Big Cat comes in again and wants a test of strength. That goes nowhere so it’s back to Morton to face the State Patrol on his own. The numbers catch up with him and it’s time for Morton to start selling. Parker drop toeholds him down and Cat hits an elbow for two. Dropkick gets two. Morton slugs back against Parker but gets powerslammed down for two.

The State Patrol keeps up the double teaming, hitting a bulldog for two. Back to Parker as I’m seeing why this team never went anywhere. Cat comes back in for a big old backbreaker for two. Parker misses a charge and there’s the hot tag to JYD. He hits the Thump (powerslam) but Cat makes the save. In a smart move, Morton immediately dives on Parker and gets the pin to retain.

Rating: D. Technically this was barely passable but what in the world was the point to this match? On second thought what was the point to these titles? The match wasn’t any good as it was in essence just a bad TV main event, which doesn’t exactly fire me up for the rest of the show. This was an odd choice all around.

Around this time Big Cat would become Big Cat Hughes and start wrestling in a nice shirt, suspenders and sunglasses. His character was a bodyguard, which he would stick with for the rest of his career. We’ll start things off in Japan at the WCW/New Japan Supershow I.

Big Cat Hughes vs. El Gigante

This is out of order for some reason as this is supposed to be the Steiners tag match. Hughes is for once not the bodyguard character. Gigante is more commonly known as Giant Gonzalez and is about 3-4 inches taller than Khali. He also has about 1/3 of the talent. To give you an idea of his size, when he’s on the floor his head is over the top rope. When he’s in the ring his tights (half shorts) nearly go above the top rope. Where the top turnbuckle would be is the height of his crotch, as in about the chest/shoulders of a guy the height of Cena.

Fonzie of ECW fame is the referee. This is more or less a squash as Hughes is about 315lbs and Gigante slams him with one arm after holding him up for awhile. He sets for a suplex and literally, as in I timed it, holds him in a front facelock while playing to the crowd for 34 seconds before doing anything. Hughes couldn’t step on his foot or something in 34 seconds? Really? A jumping boot sets up the Claw Hold to end it.

Back to America for a Lethal Lottery tag match at Starrcade 1991.

Big Van Vader/Mr. Hughes vs. Rick Steiner/Nightstalker

Nightstalker is a big man who did nothing of note for years until he became Adam Bomb in the WWF. He’s also subbing for the injured Diamond Stud here. Hughes is Big Cat from last year and now a big security guard in a suit. Vader is a monster, weighing 400lbs and running through everyone he ever faces. Rick and Vader start which is probably the best solution for everyone. Vader pounds him upside the head and clotheslines Steiner down before running him over with ease.

Rick gets back up and pounds away with right hands and a Steiner Line to send Vader to the floor. Back in and Steiner somehow manages to suplex Vader down but hurts himself. Hughes, the smaller man on the team at 6’8 and 375lbs, gets the tag. Steiner easily backdrops him down but is hesitant to tag in Nightstalker. A belly to back suplex puts Hughes down but Nightstalker reaches over and tags himself in. He doesn’t pay attention to Vader and is run over by a clothesline. Rick doesn’t realize he was tagged and Vader splashes Nightstalker for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’m a sucker for the Steiners throwing big people around and that’s what we got here. The match was nothing of note, but it was more along the lines of setting up a match between the Steiners and Hughes/Vader, which I don’t remember ever actually happening. Nightstalker was clearly in over his head here, but to be fair he was a replacement.

Here’s that same formula on steroids at Clash of the Champions XVIII.

Steiner Brothers vs. Mr. Hughes/Big Van Vader

Vader makes his Clash in ring debut here and looks like a total monster. He’s about 6’4 and weighs over 400lbs, making Mr. Hughes the smaller member of the team. Scott and Hughes get things going with Hughes wrestling in a suit and suspenders. Hughes is easily taken down twice in a row but gets in a shot to the ribs to take over. He runs Scott over with a shoulder block but Scott comes back with a great looking overhead belly to belly suplex, sending Hughes out to the floor.

Vader comes in and easily throws the Steiners to the floor, so the Brothers come back in with a double clothesline from the same corner to fire the crowd up all over again. Off to Rick with a headlock on Vader but the monster easily slams him down. A quick suplex drops Rick again and Vader just pummels him in the face. Vader easily picks him up for a gorilla press but Rick comes out of the corner with the Steiner Line and a belly to belly suplex.

Another Steiner Line puts Vader on the floor, only to have him come back in with a hard clothesline of his own. Vader goes up top but Rick nails him with a right hand and a belly to belly superplex to bring Vader down. Back to Scott for a German suplex as the crowd is just amazed by these throws. Vader catches a charging Scott in a powerslam before sitting on his chest to break up a sunset flip attempt.

Hughes comes in again but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Rick to come back in off the tag. One of the highest backdrops you’ll ever see puts Hughes down again and everything breaks down. Vader accidentally nails Hughes with a clothesline and Rick hits the top rope bulldog for the pin.

Rating: B. The Steiners continue to do things that should not be humanly possible with those suplexes. Seeing Scott easily throw Vader and Hughes around like that is something that almost has to be seen to be believed and Rick’s were hardly anything to look down on. Awesome stuff here and a great way to wake up the crowd early on.

One more WCW match at WrestleWar 1992.

Mr. Hughes/Cactus Jack vs. Ron Simmons/Junkyard Dog

No idea why Hughes is there instead of Abdullah but whatever. Cactus jumps JYD on the way to the ring and beats the living tar out of him. And people wonder why I love Foley. Being this insane wasn’t done back in the day so Jack was definitely a scary character back then. Simmons was a hot thing back then and would be world champion in the fall. JYD gets taken off so this more or less becomes a singles match.

Mr. Hughes vs. Ron Simmons

Officially isn’t a handicap but Jack is acting like a manager here. You could really tell they were getting the idea of how useful Foley could be around this time and it worked. Simmons beats them both up and I’m sure this had nothing to do with the racial issues going on behind the scenes at this point. I always liked him back then though as he was kind of a Rock like character as he was a beast athletically but not much on the mic at all.

We get a Bill Watts reference but I don’t think he had taken over yet. Hughes was a guy that I never got the appeal of but he did his job very well as a big monster that anyone could bring in for a quick feud with a face. This is a glorified squash for Simmons as there was no way he was going to lose here. Simmons hits a spinebuster and after Cactus comes in a shot to the knee ends it. Kind of weird.

Rating: D+. Nothing that special here but it was a way to get Simmons over which was the idea here. It was also less than six minutes long which was a good thing for them here as Hughes was never really that good. Jack vs. Simmons would turn out to be a decent little match and feud but it never went anywhere due to Watts and the NWA screwing it up.

Hughes would sign with the WWF as the monster bodyguard in 1993. Here’s one of his first Raw matches on May 31, 1993.

Mr. Hughes vs. Bert Centeno

Hughes throws Bert around with ease before hammering away at his back. A big boot gets two with Hughes pulling him up at two. Mr. chokes on the mat and finishes with a Boss Man Slam. Total squash.

Off to the 1993 King of the Ring.

First Round: Mr. Hughes vs. Mr. Perfect

Perfect gets a very nice pop. Heenan being sick of Perfect is great too. Savage keeps referring to this as the finals for some reason. Hughes beat Kamala and Perfect had to beat Doink three times to get here. Heenan goes on a rant about how he made perfect and Ross just says wrong. That was great. Hughes is of course dominating but he’s just not that good at all.

He’s very limited in the ring but to be fair for someone his size there’s only so much he even has to do. Perfect bumps on a level that is usually only reserved for Shawn and Flair. Bret is shown in an inset about who he’d rather face and he actually gives an answer, saying he would rather fight Perfect.

That’s not something you hear that often. Perfect makes his comeback and actually hits a backdrop on Hughes. It kind of sucked but there we are. In a very stupid ending, Hughes just grabs the urn and blasts Perfect with it. Well ok then that’s one way to end it. That was dumb.

Rating: D+. This was just bad. Hughes just flat out wasn’t interesting at all as he was such an incredibly bland character. I mean seriously, he’s a bodyguard for hire. At least with Diesel they weren’t mercenaries but were characterized as the main guy’s friends. Hughes was the main guy and that’s just a failure. Perfect did everything he could out there, but he can’t make a good match out of nothing, and that’s what he was asked to do here.

Hughes wouldn’t last long in the WWF as he would head to ECW soon after as Shane Douglas’ bodyguard. Here’s a match from some point in 1994.

911 vs. Curtis Hughes

They stare each other down and talk a lot of trash to start before a collision goes nowhere. Hughes hammers away to take over before hitting a pretty good chokeslam for two. 911 Hulks Up but a low blow puts him right back down. Curtis Hughes loads up the Boss Man Slam but 911 just stops him cold. A HUGE chokeslam (and remember that Hughes is probably about 400lbs) gives 911 the pin.

Rating: D+. That chokeslam at the end brought this way up. This was basically a battle of the bodyguards so the match was only going to be so good. It’s also a good thing that they kept this really short instead of letting them bore everyone to death. 911 wasn’t much to see but when he started beating people up, he could be very fun.

After several years on the indies (and some time as HHH’s bodyguard where he didn’t wrestle on TV), Hughes would return to the WWF in 1999. Here he on Raw, September 13, 1999.

Chris Jericho vs. Gotch Gracie

Gotch is in a mask. Jericho has only been around for about two weeks at this point. He’s feuding with Ken Shamrock to start, so this is inside a cage against a Gracie. You MMA fans will get the joke. Jericho quickly takes him down to start and cranks on the leg to make Gracie tap. That’s not enough for Jericho though so he puts on an abdominal stretch and lets it go before Gracie can tap. A brainbuster gets the posing cover for two before the Liontamer gets the real submission. Total joke of course but I chuckled.

Gracie would unmask as Mr. Hughes, setting up this match on Smackdown, September 16, 1999.

Curtis Hughes vs. Ken Shamrock

Hughes now wrestles in a shiny blue shirt with no sleeves. Jericho brings out El Dopo to referee, which may or may not be Jericholic Howard Finkel under a mask. Shamrock charges the ring to double leg Hughes and hammer away. Hughes backdrops him out to the floor and sends him into the barricade.

It doesn’t have a ton of effect though as Shamrock throws him into the post and steps. He makes the mistake of chasing Jericho though, allowing Hughes to take over. Jericho chokes with a rope as Dopo watches on. Back in and Hughes drops an elbow but gets caught in the ankle lock. Curtis grabs the ropes and Dopo DQ’s Shamrock after about half a second.

Rating: D. More angle advancement here with Jericho ticking Shamrock off before their showdown at Unforgiven. There wasn’t much to the match but there wasn’t supposed to be. Hughes did his thing here and there’s nothing wrong with a guy there for one single idea, especially when he looks as tough as Curtis.

Jericho and Hughes would team up on Heat, October 10, 1999.

Dudley Boys vs. Chris Jericho/Curtis Hughes

The Dudleys are brand new here as well. D-Von and Hughes get things going with the Dudley nailing a big shoulder block. Hughes comes back with a clothesline and brings in Jericho to face Bubba. Chris hammers him down and hits the Lionsault for no cover. Back to Hughes who walks into a sidewalk slam for two as the announcers talk about some mud wrestling from Raw. Hughes runs over D-Von until Bubba trips him up to take over. Jericho calls Hughes an idiot and I don’t see this ending well for him. Curtis goes over for a tag and Chris walks out. The 3D ends this quick.

Rating: D+. This was the beginning of the end for Hughes but it’s not like he was going to last long either way. That’s the kind of character he has: someone you bring in for a few weeks to advance a character and then let him go. The Dudleys were still getting things together in the WWF but they would take off soon.

From the next night on Raw.

Headbangers vs. Curtis Hughes/Chris Jericho

Mosh launches Jericho into a hotshot to start before throwing him into the Tree of Woe. Off to Thrasher who gets caught in a butterfly backbreaker before Hughes comes in for a headlock. The Headbangers take him into the corner for some stomping but Hughes comes back with a clothesline to Mosh. Back to Jericho who grabs the Walls but Thrasher makes the save. A double flapjack plants Jericho and Hughes tries to make a save, only to hit his partner. Jericho decks Hughes and walks out again, setting up the worst Stage Dive (powerbomb/legdrop combo) I’ve ever seen for the pin.

Rating: D. I think we’ve covered this already.

Here’s the blowoff on Smackdown, October 14, 1999.

Chris Jericho vs. Curtis Hughes

They slug it out in the aisle to start with Jericho sending him into the steps before the bell. A missile dropkick gets two but Hughes hammers away in the corner. Jericholic Howard Finkel slides in a chair and offers a distraction so Jericho can blast Hughes in the head for the pin.

As I said, Hughes is a guy that took a very basic character and ran with it for years. He’s still on the indies (minus about 150lbs) as the same character and it’s going to work until he retires. It’s such a basic character that you can work it into a ton of stories and that’s something very good to fall back on. His matches weren’t great but he played his role very well and looked intimidating.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:


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Wrestler of the Day – September 20: Kurt Angle

Today is your Olympic hero and mine, Kurt Angle.

No timeline today as it’s just a bunch of awesome Kurt matches.

We’ll start things off with one heck of a tag team match from No Mercy 2002.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Rey Mysterio/Edge vs. Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle

This was the undisputed match of the year so this more or less has to be awesome. Edge is about as hot as possible here and Rey is pretty new here. Yeah he had been around only three months or so here. Edge is just straight up awesome here and the whole thing is just greatness. Angle vs. Rey to start us off. We have what, about 25 world titles in there? Angle takes him to the mat and slaps him in the back of the head to be a jerk.

Kurt is really the only heel in this match. He literally throws Rey into his own corner because he wants a grownup apparently. Rey won’t tag out though because he wants Angle. They had a great opener at Summerslam so this works for me. Rey can’t get out of much of anything so he steps on Kurt’s foot and hits him with what can only be called an FU.

He busts out the speed and slaps Angle in the back of the head just like Kurt did earlier. The announce table being in pieces is funny for some reason. Here’s Edge to a big old pop. This is before Edge hurt his neck so he’s a totally different worker here. Off to Benoit now. Expect a LOT of play by play here as if the reviews I’ve heard are any indication there isn’t going to be much to make fun of.

The Canadians do a much more technical sequence and it’s a lot more entertaining than you would think a side headlock should be. Edge gets a knee to Benoit’s ribs and focuses on them for a while. Flapjack and a rollup get two. And there’s a knee from Kurt as Edge hits the ropes to give Benoit an advantage. They try the same thing again but Edge spears him this time.

Benoit and Angle double team Edge in a very nice sequence. Back to Angle now. The fans are all over him which is always good to hear. Better for them to be making noise at all than to be bored. Rear naked choke to Edge and Rey is getting antsy. Tazz adds in something by saying Angle is making sure Edge is facing his partner to mess with his head. Nicely done Mr. suplex machine.

Edge gets a big boot but walks into a belly to belly for two and here’s Chris again. Here are the rolling Germans as Edge is getting the tar beaten out of him. Benoit goes a little heel by drilling Rey to keep him from making the save. Benoit goes up for the headbutt and down he comes off a big old superplex.

There’s the big tag to Rey and he cranks things WAY up. The good thing is that he’s in there against two guys that can do the same thing. He sets Benoit for a Bronco Buster but goes with a running dropkick instead. HUH-FREAKING-ZAH! Rey and Benoit crank things up ever more but Benoit gets a counter and hooks up the Crossface until Edge finally saves.

Edge vs. Angle on the floor along with Benoit and Rey in the ring. 619 is blocked by Benoit but Edge hits a missile dropkick to drive Rey onto Benoit for a long two. This is all happening at a very fast pace. Rey goes up but Angle JUMPS from the mat to the top for the HUGE belly to belly off the top for another long two. Benoit’s face is like WHAT at that.

Angle in now vs. Rey as things slow down a bit. Rey starts a bit of a comeback but gets caught in a quick suplex and crashes for two. Back to the short and crazy Canadian now. After more of a beating Rey gets a headscissors to send Benoit into the post and we get double tags to bring in Edge vs. Kurt. Edge-O-Matic gets two and everyone is back in again.

Spear in the corner to Benoit and there’s the Bronco Buster. I withdraw my former HUZZAH! Spear in the corner again to Angle and Edge sits him on the middle rope. Rey runs at Edge who throws him into the air for a big old rana. Benoit looks to save with the diving headbutt but it crushes Angle and only gets two. Angle busts out a German from nowhere for two. He shouts at Edge to go to the middle which Edge does.

In a VERY nice spot, Rey runs at Edge who belly to bellies him into Angle to take down the bald one. That’s what he gets for calling spots that loudly. Benoit saves the spear and grabs the Crossface and Edge is in trouble but he gets a rope. He won’t let go so Rey hits a 619 out of somewhere. Angle Slam takes out Rey and Angle locks on the ankle lock.

Edge kicks off and grabs a small package for two. Spear gets two as Benoit saves and Rey takes out Benoit. Rey gets a running start at Edge again and Edge catches him and gives him a very nice launch into a moonsault to take out Benoit. SICK counter out of the Edgecution by Angle into the ankle lock. Edge counters that into an ankle lock of his own but Angle is all like OH NO YOU DIDN’T and counters into an ankle lock for the tap out and the titles. Sweet goodness as Cole says he’s going to applaud them for it.

Rating: A+. OH YES. Now this is what you get when you have two teams out there that are young and moving as fast as they can to make something look awesome. Smackdown was supposed to be the wrestling show back then and it certainly was. This would be part of a series of matches that made Smackdown completely awesome around this time and it was a treat to watch.

Angle had one of the best triple threats ever at Vengeance 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Ok so if Show is knocked out for most of this it should be good. This was around the time where Brock was completely awesome and could do no wrong. This is no DQ also. When has a triple threat not been no DQ? Show is in the singlet and shorts now which are perfectly acceptable. Angle and Lesnar work together but Lesnar takes a chokeslam a minute in. Angle was at the point here where he could get a good match out of anyone and he’s showing why here.

Angle busts out some garbage can lids and they beat the heck out of Big Show with them. All three of these guys are just SCARY strong. They manage a double chokeslam. Ok, that was cool. And there’s an F5 to Angle. And there’s one for Show. That never ceases to amaze me, and that doesn’t happen often. Angle gets beaten down on the floor and we get Brock vs. Show. Brock looks more awesome with the elbow pads. Brock gets a running powerbomb out of the corner. WOW.

Angle comes back in and pops the tar out of Brock with a chair. Angle is getting into that zone. Oh and he’s bleeding. It’s table time and Taz makes me laugh by saying about the Spanish announcers “You would think they’d be used to it by now.” That was good. Angle Slam through the table. The announcers point out that it might have been stupid to knock him out on the floor though which is very true. Brock is bleeding now and we have him vs. Angle. This works.

Other than Benoit, Lesnar brings out the best in Angle and that’s saying a lot. After a little bit of them beating the heck out of each other, Brock locks in a body scissors and a chokeout similar to a Tazmission actually. Even Taz points that out. Show comes in for a double chokeslam and actually gets Lesnar with the left arm higher than Angle with the right arm. Since that doesn’t work, Angle comes back with Angle Slams for both and gets the pin on Brock. Very good match to close the show.

Rating: A-. I’m not big on triple threats but this was great. Brock and Angle are just freaking fun to see beat the tar out of each other since Brock could keep up with Angle on the mat and Angle could match Brock’s strength for the most part. Big Show was solid here too which made this just a great match all around. Very fun match and well worth seeing.

We better get a World Title on him. From No Mercy 2000.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

This is announced as No DQ as Kurt comes to the ring which is a new development. Stephanie distracts Rock and Angle gets a quick advantage to start. Angle gets a chair shot on the floor and Rock is in trouble. Back in the ring a Samoan Drop gets two for the champion. Angle tries to leave for some reason but Rock makes the stop. Rock throws him through the set as this is a big brawl.

Ross says that Angle is challenging for the richest prize in the Game. Is this suddenly a match taking place inside of HHH? Is the belt his pancreas or something? Stephanie chokes Rock behind the referee’s back as Ross says she’s legally breaking the rules. If it’s legal, how is she still breaking the rules? Rock gets a chair shot to his ankle. This was before the ankle lock I think.

Dragon screw leg whip sets up the Sharpshooter and he taps out as Stephanie has the referee. Angle is continuously selling the knee having it start off as a big hindrance and moving on to a slightly weaker one which is very impressive. He gets a long chinlock to kill some time but winds up on the floor and we’re back outside again.

Angle tries to get a belt shot while Stephanie gets the referee. I don’t get the whole thinking here but they’re trying at least. Angle misses the perfect moonsault and we slug it out. Rock punches the tar out of him and takes over again. Again might be a stretch but you get the idea. A spinebuster sets for the Elbow but Stephanie makes the save. Rock Bottom for her but Angle stops the elbow.

And cue HHH who destroys….Kurt. Ah there’s the Pedigree for the Rock too. That’s more like it. HHH carries Stephanie out as Angle covers for two and a big pop on the kickout. Rock gets a DDT for two as you can feel us getting to the ending. He sends Angle to the floor, walks around the ring with him and throws him back in. Even Rock can have an odd moment I guess.

Here’s Rikishi too as they continue trying to force this push down our throats no matter how hard it fails. He beats on Angle a bit as apparently he’s helping out his Samoan brethren. Rock Bottom out of nowhere but Rock can’t cover. The fat Samoan gets in and accidently nails Rock in the corner and accidently superkicks him. Both guys get Olympic Slams to give Angle his first of 9 (not 12 idiotic TNA) world titles to date.

Rating: B. This was of course solid as you would expect for these two. Angle was still kind of in over his head at this point as he hadn’t locked in that total insanity thing yet. The Rikishi interference was annoying but I get the HHH aspect at least. Amusingly enough Angle won the title once Stephanie left rather than while she was there. Solid match but their rematch in February where Rock would get the title back would be better.

So there was a pay per view five days after September 11 and Angle was in his hometown and challenging for the WWF Title. Has there ever been a more perfect set up? From Unforgiven 2001.

WWF World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Steve Austin

Angle gets the hometown boy pop and Fink milks it perfectly. “From PITTSBURGH PENNSYLVANIA!” Angle meets him on the ramp and here we go. Austin is hammered down and Angle is all fired up. The champ is all afraid to try the Stunner because either it won’t work or the kick to set it up could result in an ankle lock. Angle hits a Thesz Press and hammers away in the corner.

We head to the floor and Austin is reeling. Austin blocks a superplex but Kurt is like oh yes you are going and hits it on the second attempt. Austin grabs a sleeper but gets countered by a jawbreaker. He tries to leave with the title but Angle catches up to him and throws Austin off the ramp just like Austin did to him a few weeks ago. Angle puts him against the railing and pounds him down with punches and chops.

Kurt picks Austin up and carries him back to the ring, ramming him into the post. We’re seven minutes into this and it’s been 95% Angle. He stops to peel back the mats and Austin gets a knee to the back to take over. Piledriver on the floor doesn’t work and Austin is cut above the eye. Angle chops away and tries an Olympic piledriver but is backdropped as well.

Angle tries a suplex out there but Austin reverses and drops him onto the table. He does it again and the table is sturdy. Here’s a third try and it STILL doesn’t break. That’s a good table! Austin drives knees to the neck back inside. He talks trash to Kurt’s family in the front row which is why he’s a great heel: he knows how to get a crowd riled up which so few people today know how to do.

Off to the chinlock and I’m cool with that as they’ve been going hard for almost 15 minutes. Austin pounds on the back but gets caught in the Germans. It’s just three this time but Kurt is holding his neck. Austin tries a super belly to back but Kurt reverses into a bad looking cross body for two.

Release spinebuster puts Angle down and Austin kicks him in the little Olympians. The referee is shoved so Angle kicks Austin low to even things up. A DDT sends Austin to the floor and we’re running out of time. This has been pretty good but it’s certainly no classic. Back in Angle stuns Austin for two. Austin hits a belly to back suplex called the Angle Slam. I mean he didn’t even try to change it. A piledriver gets a close two and Austin is getting mad. He loads up the Stunner but Angle grabs the boot and the ankle lock gives Angle the title.

Rating: B. The match was certainly good but it’s not on the level I think they were hoping for. It never quite hit that level of intensity and violence and Angle’s neck injury didn’t quite live up to the amount of intensity that I think it was supposed to. Definitely good though, just not a classic.

Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Taker wants to fight Rock but is afraid to actually do anything about it. Angle shoves both guys and wants to fight which earns him a double beatdown. Rock clotheslines him out to the floor, leaving himself all alone with Undertaker. Taker pounds Rock in the corner but Rock makes a quick comeback with right hands of his own. Angle is knocked off the apron and out to the floor but he pulls the champion out with him, sending Taker into the steps.

It’s Rock vs. Angle now and there’s a belly to belly for the Brahma Bull. Angle chops away in the corner and drops Rock with another suplex. A DDT gets two for Rock and Angle rolls to the floor. Rock goes out as well leaving only the referee in the ring. Undertaker pops up and takes Angle’s head off with a clothesline and heads back inside to pound on Rock. Angle is punched off the apron by Undertaker but the champion walks into a chokeslam from Rock (you read that right) for two.

Angle is back in now but gets taken down and put in the ankle lock by the other challenger. Kurt pops up and Rock Bottoms the Rock for two as Undertaker makes the save. Angle tries the Slam on Undertaker but Taker escapes and hits the Angle Slam on Kurt. Rock nips up and sends Angle to the floor before hitting the spinebuster and People’s Elbow on Taker. Kurt pulls Rock out of the ring again and gets two on Taker, only to be launched into the corner and pounded on by the champ.

Kurt fights back but misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post, sending him out to the floor. Undertaker sends him face first into the post for good measure but here’s Rock with a spit of water into Taker’s face to slow him down. The champ throws Rock over the announcer’s table but here’s a busted open Kurt to keep things moving. Taker slugs him down again though and drops a leg on the apron before heading back inside. Old School puts Angle down but Rock makes another save.

Rock still can’t get any extended offense on Undertaker though as the champion hits a running DDT for two. Angle grabs a chair but Taker punches him down. Kurt gets ping ponged back and forth between the other guy guys, only to have Rock hit Undertaker low to put him down. That plus a chair shot to the head put Undertaker down and Angle lays out Rock with the Slam as well. A slightly damaged referee counts two on each guy for Angle but there’s the Sharpshooter from Rock to Kurt.

Taker makes a quick save with a big boot to Rock’s face and hits the Last Ride powerbomb but Kurt breaks up the cover with the ankle lock. Undertaker finally rolls through to counter and we get the same sequence from the July 4th show with Angle countering the powerbomb into the choke. Angle gets his shoulder up and even another powerbomb can’t break the hold.

Undertaker doesn’t tap but his arm is lifted and dropped twice in a row. Rock makes the save but gets caught in the ankle lock but Rock rolls Angle up for two. There’s the chokeslam to Angle but Taker gets a Rock Bottom for two. Angle hits the Slam on Undertaker and takes down the straps but walks into the Rock Bottom for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Sometimes the solution to the problems a wrestling company is having is to have a good wrestling match. Instead of the old and slow guys in the world title scene, this had two young guys who could move very well out there to bounce off Undertaker’s power moves. This is easily the best PPV title match so far this year other than maybe Rock vs. Jericho.

We’ll jump back to the midcard for a bit at Wrestlemania XVI.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

This is an interesting idea. Angle holds both titles coming in and there are going to be two falls here. The first is for the Intercontinental Title and the second is for the European Title, so basically we’re getting back to back triple threats. Jericho guarantees to walk out of this match as the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah while the other two will walk out with a shirt that complains about how lousy the shirt is as well as how bad the beating from Jericho was.

Benoit jumps Angle before the bell before heading inside for a clothesline from his fellow Canadian. All three are in now and Benoit chops Jericho, only to have his belly to back suplex escaped. Benoit breaks up a springboard dropkick by Jericho before fighting with Angle on the apron. Jericho hits the previously broken up dropkick to send both guys out to the floor. He joins them immediately, only to be sent into the steps by Kurt. Back in and a belly to belly suplex gets two for Angle on Jericho.

Jericho hits a backbreaker on Angle but Benoit shoves Jericho off the top and into the announce table for good measure. Benoit covers Angle for two before suplexing him down for the same. Jericho is back in for a dropkick to his fellow Canadian but Benoit comes right back with a clothesline for two more. Jericho bulldogs Angle down but Benoit comes back with chops of his own on the other Chris. Angle suplexes Benoit down but Jericho makes the save. Very back and forth action so far.

Jericho camel clutches Benoit but has to break it up to stop a charging Kurt. Angle hits a big suplex on Jericho for two as Benoit makes another save. Benoit rolls up Jericho in the corner but Angle dropkicks his head face first into the middle buckle to break it up. Jericho loads up a double arm suplex on Angle but gets countered into a crossface chickenwing. Benoit comes back in and dropkicks Angle before sending him to the floor and into the barricade. Back in and the Swan Dive to Jericho gives Benoit the first fall and the Intercontinental Title.

Very wisely Benoit immediately covers Jericho for an attempt at the European Title but it only gets two as Kurt dives in for the save. Angle suplexes Benoit down for two but takes too long on the moonsault attempt, allowing Jericho to break it up. Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but Benoit supelxes Chris down, allowing Angle to miss the moonsault on Benoit. All three guys are down now until Angle covers Benoit for two. Jericho gets back into it with a Walls attempt on Angle, only to have the other Chris break it up.

Everyone gets back up and it’s Jericho with a spinwheel kick to take Benoit to the floor. The double powerbomb puts Angle down but Benoit comes back in for the Rolling Germans on Jericho. Benoit goes old school with a Dragon Supelx on Angle for two. Jericho hits the forearm on the referee by mistake, only to be put in the Crossface by the new IC Champion.

It gets an unseen tapout but Benoit releases, allowing Jericho to put Benoit in the Walls. Angle hits Jericho with a title belt but Benoit makes the save as the referee is awake again. Benoit suplexes Angle down again but misses the Swan Dive. Jericho slides in for the Lionsault on Benoit for the European Title to end things.

Rating: B+. Awesome match here which would have been match of the year when this style dominated in 2003. All three guys were the future generation of the company once we shifted to the technical style over on Smackdown in a few years, but here it’s just awesome instead of a match of the times. This is one of the only things that people remember from this show and with good reason: it was awesome.

The next year later Angle had a one on one match with Benoit that had people drooling.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

On his way to the ring, Angle rips on Texas for various reasons, primarily the lone star flag. Oh and cowboy hats are stupid. This match was made on Raw because neither guy had anything to do for Wrestlemania. It’s as simple as it sounds, but do you need anything more than that for this pairing? Angle still insists that he didn’t tap out to Benoit on Raw. Heyman: “This is as excited as a man can get with his clothes on.”

Angle takes it to the mat to start which is fine with Benoit as the struggle begins. Benoit sits out and it’s a standoff, drawing a nice ovation from the crowd. It worked so well before that they do it again, drawing a bigger ovation this time. Angle hits a kind of suplex to take it to the mat for a third time but Benoit sits out again as they fight for position. They roll into the ropes for another break and the fans are pleased yet again.

Benoit takes it to the mat again and tries the Crossface, sending Angle into the safety of the ropes. Kurt bails to the floor for a breather as he isn’t sure what to do with Benoit here. Back in and Angle has to get to a rope to escape another Crossface attempt. Angle blasts Benoit with a right hand to shift the style and momentum here as they head outside. Benoit goes first into the announce table and shoulder first into the steps to keep Kurt in control.

Back in and Angle gets two off a belly to back suplex. A belly to belly gets no cover by Kurt and neither does the second one Angle hits in a row. Benoit comes back with a clothesline as the only advantage of the match so far is gone. Benoit starts slugging away in the corner before hitting a knee to Angle’s ribs. A back elbow to Angle’s face gets two as does a snap suplex ala Dynamite Kid. Benoit follows up with a superplex and holds his neck afterwards. He would be about three months from neck surgery that put him out for over a year.

Speaking of neck injuring suplexes, Benoit rolls some Germans but Angle rolls through the third one into the ankle lock. Benoit escapes that into an ankle lock of his own for good measure. The stealing finishers was one of Angle’s major deals so this shouldn’t be a surprise. Benoit tries the Crossface but Angle blocks it from going on full. Angle puts Benoit in the Crossface for good measure but Benoit gets a foot on the ropes.

Angle accidentally charges into the referee, just before Benoit puts Angle in the Crossface for an unseen tap out. Benoit releases the hold and gets caught in the Angle Slam for two. Angle’s moonsault hits Benoit’s knees, allowing Benoit to go up for the Swan Dive. That gets two, but Angle rolls through and hooks the tights for the win.

Rating: B+. It’s Angle vs. Benoit at Wrestlemania. Did you expect this to be anything less than awesome? This wasn’t as good as their masterpiece at the 2003 Rumble, but it would be a match of the year candidate on any other show. That’s what you expect from these two though, and this is an excellent match that is overshaddowed by the rematches they would have later.

Time to open the other best show ever. From Summerslam 2002.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey beat Angle in a tag match and has been an annoyance for him lately. This is right after Mysterio debuted as part of probably the best year for new talent in company history. In 2002 WWE got Mysterio, Brock Lesnar, Batista, Randy Orton and a guy named Cena. This is when Rey’s knees weren’t held together by glue so it should be awesome. Rey comes in from behind and takes Angle down with a quick springboard dropkick but he has to go to the ropes to escape the ankle lock. An early 619 attempt misses and Angle pulls him to the floor. Very fast start.

Angle kicks at the leg as they come back in. An uppercut staggers Rey and a wheelbarrow suplex puts him down. Rey grabs the rope to avoid a German and gets a quick two off a rollup. Kurt gets two off a backbreaker and bends Rey’s back around the ropes. The fans are all over Angle but he shrugs off some forearms and catches a headscissors into a side slam for two.

Off to a wicked half crab on Rey but he somehow sneaks out and gets two off a rollup. Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline, only to get caught in a jawbreaker. Rey tries to speed things up but walks into the overhead belly to belly. There go the straps but Rey armdrags out of the Angle Slam and sends Angle to the floor. Rey loads up a dive but the referee stops him, drawing the most heat of the night. Mysterio will have none of that and dives OVER THE REFEREE to take Angle out.

Back in and a springboard legdrop gets two as the crowd is on fire. Rey tries a victory roll but gets caught in the ankle lock. Mysterio rolls out and send Angle to the ropes for the 619. The West Coast Pop gets a VERY close two and a spinwheel kick puts Angle down again. Mysterio goes up top but Angle runs the ropes for the suplex, only to have Rey flip over him but he tweaks the ankle on the landing. He’s fine enough to pop back up and dropkick Angle on the corner though and he loads up a hurricanrana. Angle falls forward on it though and the ankle lock is good for the submission.

Rating: A-. EXCELLENT opener here with Mysterio showing he could hang with anyone in the company. He really was amazing to watch when he wasn’t banged up and bloated like he is today and this might be his best match ever. This was a great choice for an opener and both guys looked amazing.

So a dancing Samoan, a Cerebral Assassin, a beer drinking redneck, an undead biker and a brahma bull walk into Hell in a Cell. Who else could possibly survive this but Kurt Angle? From Armageddon 2000.

WWF Title: HHH vs. The Rock vs. Undertaker vs. Steve Austin vs. Rikishi vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is champion here. I remember the buildup for this and the question being who would take the huge bump. It more or less came down to Rock or HHH as Taker was too big, Rikishi was too big and Austin/Angle both had far too bad necks to take the risk. Rikishi is just so freaking worthless that it’s amazing. Angle comes out third which is kind of weird.

If I remember right Chyna made fun of his attire here as he complained about his package looking too small. Rikishi is mad at Angle for beating him up on Smackdown due to that alliance being broken. I think this is the debut of Rollin as Taker’s theme song. Rock walks straight in as Angle is staying outside for awhile. There are like 6 referees in there keeping people from fighting each other before the match starts. Austin gets a HUGE pop since we’re in the deep south. He throws Angle in and we’re on.

The match has to end in the cage. I’ll do what I can to keep track of what’s going on here but don’t count on much. Angle vs. Taker, Samoan violence and Austin vs. HHH if you’re curious. Lawler evaluates the talent in there at a billion dollars. And people wonder why the USWA went out of business. Leaping knee takes Austin down. We’re just standing around at the moment as we wait on the big thing to happen, likely involving vince. Rock beats on Angle in the ring while the other four fight on the floor.

And now there’s no one in the ring. Ok then. Ah make that Angle/Rock again. This really would have been perfect for the Chamber if it had existed at the time. They overhype everything here as it’s decent but really just a lot of punching so far. HHH gets rubbed into the cage by Austin. Lawler: Don’t rip his nose off! This really isn’t that interesting at all. A bloody HHH hits the Pedigree on Rikishi and Rock saves. I think that’s the first cover of the match.

Finishers a go-go in the ring and everyone saves. After some more basic stuff, Vince and the Stooges come down with a freaking hay truck and says he’s going to tear the cage down. There goes the door and you know what’s coming now. Foley comes down and runs the three guys off, saying the match is going to happen. HHH is outside and Austin follows him.

They fight up by the cars and everyone else comes up there too. Austin hits him with a boom camera and winds up going through a window to bust him open. Pedigree on Rock onto a car. Isn’t the point of a Cell match for the to stay in the Cell? Rock is bleeding….kind of. Ah that’s more like it. Ross oversells everything here, making it sound like it’s the best match ever or something like that. HHH takes a slingshot into a car in a cool looking spot.

Taker and Angle go back to the ring area and it’s all Taker. A chair shot busts him open as HHH and Austin climb the cage. They fight on top and HHH teases the big drop. Angle comes up too to get away from Taker. Stunner on the roof and Taker is up there now too. Rock and Rikishi are the only two not up there at this point. Angle is bleeding now and HHH climbs down to HUGE booing. Austin follows which makes sense.

And here come the Samoans. Taker gets a chair on top somehow and hits a SICK shot to Angle’s head. The fat man hits Taker though and stands tall. It’s just hard take him seriously in that thong though. Rock is on the floor as I don’t think he was ever up top. Angle gets down and it’s the two big men left. They slug it out near the edge over the truck and in the words of Mark Madden: FLY FATBOY FLY! Austin stops dead to see what the thud was, as does Rock. Austin’s face is the most interesting part here actually.

The roof goes off as Austin and Rock slug it out. You knew that was Mania right there. What we didn’t know was that it would top off the best PPV of all time. Rock actually wins the fight and sets for the elbow. Cue HHH for the save as I wonder how we never got the triple threat with these three guys. Rock Bottom to Angle but Austin saves. Stunner to Rock and we get a back flip, but HHH takes out Austin with a neckbreaker, allowing Kurt to put his hand on Rock to retain and shock everyone kind of, ending the show.

Rating: B. This was good but a far cry from the other Cell matches. Like I said, this was perfect for the Chamber but this was still a big match. The first half or so is really weak until we get to all the finishers, but even then we were waiting on it to turn into the big war. Vince and the truck did that and once that happened it really took off and was the match I think they were shooing for. It’s good but it’s not a classic. Meltzer allegedly said it was a match of the year candidate. Must have been a very weak class that year if that’s the case.

We haven’t been to TNA yet. From Genesis 2006 in Angle’s first important match.

Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

Joe has been undefeated for eighteen months in TNA. Angle has a big bandage on his head after a match with Abyss. Kurt grabs a single leg to start but Joe is immediately in the ropes. Some kicks to the ribs set up Angle’s overhead belly to belly and a clothesline puts Joe on the floor. That’s fine with the Samoan as he grabs Angle by the legs and pulls him to the floor, swinging him into the barricade. Quite the counter.

Back in and Angle misses a charge into the post and falls back out to the floor. The suicide elbow drops Kurt again and Joe rams him face first into the steps for good measure. They’re actually nailing the big match feel so far. Kurt’s head is busted open as the bandage has come off. Joe of course kicks at the cut and digs away with his fingers. That’s quite the savage as he rubs Angle’s blood over his chest.

A powerslam puts Angle down for two and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets the same as Joe is in full control. He tries the MuscleBuster too early though and Angle counters with a tornado DDT for two. Joe misses a charge into the corner though and it’s time to roll some Germans. They both the release though and Joe is dropped (thankfully not on his head) for two.

The Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag and Joe nails a running knee in the corner. An enziguri sets up the MuscleBuster for a close two and both guys are down. Angle rolls out of the Koquina Clutch and grabs the Slam for two. The fans want someone to make the other tap and Angle takes down the straps.

Kurt hooks the ankle lock but Joe finally rolls over and pulls Kurt down into the Clutch. Angle counters that into the ankle lock and Joe is in trouble. He rolls through to send Angle into the corner but misses a charge, setting up the Slam. Angle does a favorite of mine by putting the straps back up so he can take them down agani, setting up the ankle lock with a grapevine to make Joe tap out.

Rating: B-. It’s good but this didn’t hit the levels they were shooting for. The fact that it was only thirteen and a half minutes hurt it a bit as they needed some extra time to make this a big better. It’s good, but having this match so soon in Angle’s run but it wasn’t the worst decision in the world.

We need more Benoit! From Backlash 2001.

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

30 minute time limit, most submissions win. Angle says Chicago is full of fat sweaty pigs and needs winners. He makes fun of the city which is kind of funny. There’s a thirty second rest period between falls. After some feeling out stuff to start, Angle takes it to the mat and Benoit is all cool with that. Ankle lock doesn’t work so Kurt hits the floor to think for a bit.

This is going to be a long one as the clock is on the screen the entire time. Back in the ring and Angle takes Benoit down which gets him nowhere. Back to the mat again and this time to the floor. Benoit gets the Crossface out there and Angle taps but they’re outside so it doesn’t count. Five minutes in and no falls yet. Angle tries to bring in a chair as we stall a bit. With half an hour I can understand that though.

Back in and Angle is holding his shoulder a lot. And never mind as he was faking since he charges straight in and grabs the ankle lock for the quick tap. You could argue Benoit tapped early to prevent further damage but it still looks kind of weak by Benoit. Angle works on the ankle/knee but charges into a Crossface attempt. That doesn’t work so Benoit shifts to a cross armbreaker to tie us up.

Benoit rams Angle’s shoulder into the post and there’s the armbreaker again but Kurt leans forward to avoid a lot of the pressure before making the rope. Shoulder breaker by Benoit and he goes after Kurt, only to take out the referee at the ten minute mark. Angle gets a chair shot to the head and the ankle lock makes it 2-1. Angle jumps him during the rest period and you can’t really DQ him I guess.

Angle puts on a Crossface seconds later to make it 3-1. Maybe 10 seconds between the end of the rest period and the tap. Kurt hammers him some more and rams his face into the announce table. Benoit backdrops Angle to the floor but doesn’t take the time to breathe. Kurt’s shoulder goes into the post but Benoit’s everything goes into the steps. Ankle lock goes on but it’s still on the floor, meaning Benoit tapping doesn’t mean anything.

We go back in with fifteen minutes left and a 3-1 lead for Kurt. Benoit avoids a cross armbreaker by Kurt which wastes some time. Off to an abdominal stretch which Benoit counters into another cross armbreaker attempt but he can’t get the tap. Out of almost nowhere Benoit gets a Sharpshooter, only for Kurt to make the ropes again. A German is countered into a half Liontamer by Benoit (he used it before Jericho in WCW) for the tap to make it 3-2.

Kurt heads to the floor and it’s time to play defense. Benoit catches him pretty easily and sends him into the steps. Kurt tries to run again and the fans aren’t thrilled at all. With ten minutes to go Angle catches Benoit coming in and they slug it out a bit. Benoit can’t get back in for a bit and Kurt stomps him when he does. Angle hits a snap suplex back inside and keeps trying for the ankle lock.

Out to the floor again and they chop it out. Back in and Benoit gets a dragon screw but can’t hook the ankle. Benoit misses a dropkick and Angle locks in some freaky looking hold before going to a chinlock. Five minutes left as Benoit gets his arm up before a third drop. With four minutes left Benoit breaks the hold with a jawbreaker. And never mind as Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline.

Belly to belly by Kurt which is scary considering how long they’ve been out there. Another hits with three minutes left. Benoit manages to grab some Germans but gets reversed into an ankle lock which he reverses into an ankle lock of his own to tie it up at 3 with just over two minutes to go. The clock keeps running during the thirty second rest. Chop block by Benoit with 1:20 to go. Minute left and it’s German time again. Low blow by Kurt breaks that up but the ankle lock is broken quickly. Ankle lock goes on fill with 8 seconds left and we’re done. Benoit taps after the bell ends in a draw.

Just like in 96 though with Shawn and Bret, it’s time for some overtime, first submission wins it. If it continued though, why wouldn’t the tap just after the bell have ended it? Angle hammers him and the fans aren’t thrilled with him. They go to the mat and Angle grabs an abdominal stretch down there. There’s a Crossface out of nowhere and Angle taps for the ending. Like Benoit was losing in sudden death.

Rating: B. It was entertaining, but the main idea of Benoit vs. Angle is all about having them go back and forth with insane counters until one of them finally gets caught in something. That was taken away here and it brings the match down a lot. To be fair it’s still good but by comparison it’s definitely not as good.

Time for a war. From King of the Ring 2001.

Shane McMahon vs. Kurt Angle

It should be noted that this is one of my favorite matches ever so I’ll be biased in it. Wait, they’re my reviews so I’m biased towards myself, so it’s fine. Angle throws his medals down on the way to the ring so you know this is serious. Again, JR says that after I typed it so I win again. Angle is just beating the heck out of Shane to start here. And just as I say that Shane starts throwing lefts and fights back.

With Shane on the floor, Angle gets on all fours and wants to go amateur, which is more popular that pro in certain areas other than wrestling. Naturally Angle easily gets out and beats on Shane even more. In a nice looking move, Angle hits a gutwrench but it’s overhead instead of to the side. It looked cool. Angle is just throwing Shane everywhere. It looks like a squash but don’t worry. It’ll get better. Shane has had three punches and an armdrag.

He offers Shane another amateur attempt but this time Shane just punts him in the ribs. That’s followed by a jumping back elbow making him awesome. On the floor now, Shane gets on the railing behind JR and Heyman and jumps over both them and the table to hit Kurt with a clothesline in a sweet spot. The guy was athletic and no one can ever argue that.

It’s certainly more entertaining than seeing Vince out there making a fool out of himself. And we have a kendo stick which Shane can swing really well. He actually breaks it over Angle’s back which has to hurt bad. Shane uses armdrags on the floor to send Angle into the railing which is a nice spot. Shane goes for a cover and Angle bridges out of it. Think of the Matrix move.

Shane does the smart thing and just hits him in the stomach. Angle does this three times, showing off his stupidity. It’s weapons time now and Shane is dominating. Ankle lock by Shane and Kurt just kicks him in the face. Nothing wrong with that. We get a Sharpshooter attempt and Shane botches it but gets it eventually. It looks bad but it’s ok I guess. Granted almost no one gets it right so it’s fine.

Shane is just beating the tar out of Angle here. He puts a trash can on his stomach and goes to the top for a shooting star press which misses but looked solid. The fans get a holy censored chant going as they’re impressed here. We hit the floor again and Shane hits a suplex, which breaks Kurt’s tailbone. He’s legit hurt which makes the rest of the match even more impressive. His solution to Shane fighting back: slam Shane’s head into a wall. I like the simple ideas.

In the sickest bump you’ll see in years, Angle suplexes Shane over his head into one of the glass walls with KOR (what, no love for the?) on them. The problem is that it doesn’t break and Shane lands on his head which goes THUD. It sounded and looked SICK. Shane is more or less out of it.

Angle, ticked off that it didn’t work, picks him up and does it AGAIN, this time having it work, drawing another holy censored chant. Angle’s arm is bleeding. We’re under the stage now and Angle suplexes him again and AGAIN it doesn’t break. Shane is busted. Angle goes for another suplex and it doesn’t break. In essence, Shane is being thrown into a wall. Kurt is livid and just picks him up and launches him through a glass wall.

Shane looks like he’s been beaten by an army and raped by a bear while being run over by a train. Angle is spent too. Everyone is just bleeding like something that bleeds a lot. Angle gets an anvil case and puts Shane on it to wheel him back to the ring. That’s a good idea as he’s just dead weight at this point. We’re back in the ring and Angle covers Shane. For two. The place pops like a freaking teenage girl for that. We get a replay where we can see Kurt’s face and he looks like he wants to cry.

A low blow connects and Shane isn’t dead yet. He gets a trash can lid and just pops the tar out of Angle and hits an Olympic Slam for two. Both guys are just freaking spent. Shane gets catapulted into the corner where he just kind of collapses. Angle gets a board from somewhere and just beats Shane about the back and shoulder with it. There’s something awesome about that.

He sets it up on the copes and climbs to the top where he this the Olympic Slam from the top rope. I would say Shane lands in the middle of the ring with a thud, but as they said in Con Air, “the word ain’t land. It’s crash.” They show a bunch a replays and the slam looks cooler and cooler ever time. I mean Shane just explodes on the mat and it looks amazing. Shane’s best match ever by about 1000 miles. They carry him out and he’s just gone. The Slam off the top got the pin if that wasn’t clear.

Rating: A. This was just freaking brutal. It’s a great street fight where you never really believed Shane was completely out of it. That’s a great thing to be able to say, but Shane took the best beating I can recall anyone taking in a long time. Find a copy of this match as it’s right up there with any beating I’ve ever seen.

Back to TNA for a showdown at Lockdown 2010.


Kurt Angle vs. Ken Anderson

This is standard rules but Anderson has the key. Not sure I get the point to that aspect as it’s bound be thrown around sometime. Also, I’d prefer a regular cage match but this is fine I suppose. Anderson has the key around his neck. Ok he has a chain around his neck with the key around it but you get the idea. Anderson goes for the door like 30 seconds in and like an idiot, he forgets about Angle.

Anderson accidentally leaves the key in the lock so there goes the point of the ladder match entirely. Angle is bleeding BAD already. Tenay says it was bound to happen at some point. At some point? I think every match has had that so far. This is one of the feuds that I’ve really liked for the majority of it. Angle is WORKING in there man. He’s still one of the best in the world when he works at it.

There is blood everywhere. Ok not really but it sounds good. Angle hits his run up the ropes and hit a belly to belly. Love that. Anderson uses his wrist tape to choke Angle out which is rather brilliant. Solid match so far. Angle gets his Germans. He hits about 6 or 7 of them and Anderson is just about out of it.

Angle goes for the door but stops. Dang it Kurt don’t be stupid. Ankle Lock is on but you can’t win by tap out. And there’s the Mic Check. Yeah I’m stunned too. Anderson gets the lock open but Angle gets the Slam. And Angle locks the cage again. Ok then. And he throws the key away. Anderson freaks, even though there’s no roof on the cage.

Anderson tries to get out but Angle gets a German OFF THE TOP ROPE! SICK spot. Angle sets him for the moonsault but goes TO THE TOP OF THE CAGE! And he hits it. Yeah Angle still has it. Angle gets a key from….somewhere, but Anderson flips the double bird and is able to get a Mic Check.

We’re getting close to overkill here. Angle catches him with the ankle lock though and Anderson taps again. I smell a broken ankle. Anderson reverses but STILL can’t get out. Angel finds a chain or the Warrior Medal and chokes Anderson out with it in a reference to Anderson choking him out in the ladder match on Impact before walking out. GREAT match.

Rating: A+. Yeah I said it. Great match all around and the ending made sense given the way Anderson won the ladder match. This has been a great show and it needed a great match to get it over the hump. It just got that. Angle is still one of the best in the world and he can bring it.

We’ll jump to TV now for an Iron Man match on Smackdown, September 18, 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is champion coming in. This is an iron man match with a sixty minute time limit. There’s a 15 second rest period after each fall. The challenger is the heel. Lesnar jumps him to start and we have a big old clock in the corner. Brock beats him down to start but Angle fires back with some clotheslines. Angle gets a shot to the knee and Brock chills on the floor.

He stays out there until about 8 and the knee isn’t right. Brock asks for time but he was just channeling his inner Bret Hart as he plays possum. Angle doesn’t mind and hits a set of armdrags to send Brock out to the floor. Lesnar grabs the steps but tosses them back instead of using them. He slides in at 9 and goes right back out to break the count. Well it’s not like they don’t have a lot of time to kill.

Brock breaks the count again and make it three times. Four times now. Angle is getting ticked which might be Lesnar’s plan. We’re five minutes into the clock now and we haven’t really gotten anything going but they have plenty of time. Angle goes for the knee and Brock hits the floor AGAIN. Angle charges at him and Brock nails him to finally take over. Angle snaps off a suplex and clotheslines Brock to the floor where he holds the knee again.

Lesnar is down and holding the knee but this time Angle goes after him. He rams Brock into the steps head first and they slug it out. Brock gets the better of that and rams Kurt into the post back first. He goes to grab a chair and pops Angle in the head with it for a DQ at about nine minutes. Brock lays Angle out with the chair a bunch of times but it’s in the rest period so it doesn’t count.

Brock grabs some water at ringside. Does that mean there’s a conspiracy against him? Angle is barely able to stand so Brock drills him with an F5 to tie it up at 49:38 to go. Brock kicks him in the ribs and asks Angle if he wants to tap. Lesnar puts the ankle lock on Kurt and he taps to make it 2-1 at 47:21. We take a break and come back at 44 minutes left with Lesnar breaking an Angle rally with a knee to the ribs.

During the break Brock hit an Angle Slam for two. Brock charges but his shoulder goes into the post. Angle gets a forearm smash and it’s German time. Angle comes at Brock but gets sent back outside. Brock whips him into the railing HARD and this an F5 on the floor for the countout to go up 3-1 at 20 minutes in.

We take a break and come back with Angle in control after hitting some suplexes during the break. Lesnar knocks Kurt to the floor with an elbow and takes over soon thereafter. We’re at 35 minutes left now as Brock gets two off an elbow drop. Angle reverses an Irish whip into the Angle Slam and it’s 3-2 at 34 minutes to go. We’re told that if this goes to a tie we’ll have overtime.

Kurt pounds away but the Angle Slam is countered into an F5 attempt which is countered into the ankle lock. Brock rolls through and Angle manages to avoid the referee. Brock however drills him in the head with a clothesline so when Angle hits the Angle Slam, there’s no referee. Brock hits Angle low and grabs the title. A shot to the head of Angle puts him down and the referee wakes up to make it 4-2 Brock at 29:30 to go.

We take a break and come back with Angle on the floor with 25 minutes to go. Angle pulls him to the floor and hammers away, sending Brock into the steps. With Brock on the outside, Angle goes back in and up top to hit a double axe to Brock’s back. That only gets two back inside though. Kurt goes up again and hits the missile dropkick for a close two. The moonsault that hits once a decade doesn’t hit here and both guys are down.

Angle grabs a rollup for two so Brock takes his head off with a clothesline. Brock gets all ticked off and throws Angle over his head without leaving his own feet. Well that was awesome. It only gets two though and both guys are down. Kurt reverses another belly to belly into the ankle lock but Brock rolls through to send Angle to the floor. Angle goes into the steps again and back to the ring we go.

That only gets two in the ring as we have 20 minutes left with with score 4-2 Brock. Lesnar unhinges some steps but Angle hits a baseball slide to send them into Brock’s face. Kurt looks like his shoulder is hurt from going into the steps. Angle gets an elbow for two as we take a break. Back and it’s 5-2 as Brock hit a superplex for a fall during the break.

We have 14 minuets to go and it’s 5-2 Brock. Brock takes him outside and tries to F5 Angle into the post but Angle reverses to give Brock an F5 into the post with the bad knee hitting the steel. Back inside and Angle throws on a half crab which is very smart. Brock makes the ropes so Angle throws on the ankle lock. Lesnar STILL doesn’t tap so Kurt stomps away at the leg/ankle.

Kurt charges in at Brock but gets caught in an F5. Brock can’t counter though and can only get a delayed two. Lesnar goes up top but Angle pops up for the running belly to belly and it’s 5-3 with 9:50 to go. Angle wins a slugout and pounds Brock down in the corner. Angle puts the straps back up which is a new one for him. He tries to load up the Angle Slam but Brock grabs a DDT for two.

Kurt misses a right hand and Lesnar hits a German. Make that two Germans. Would you believe three Germans? He tries a fourth (there has been a lot of laying around between them so about 90 seconds passed for all those Germans) but Angle counters into two Germans of his own. Angle rolls through something into the ankle lock and in more or less the same ending at Summerslam, Brock can’t find a rope and taps with 4:11 to go.

Four minutes left and both guys are down. Brock still leads 5-4. They’re still down with 3:30 left. Kurt grabs the hold again but Brock rolls through to escape. They’re both down again but Kurt is up and stomping away with three minutes left. Bow and arrow hold, which is like a side version of the STF, goes on to eat up some time. Brock wisely heads to the floor with two minutes left.

Smart strategy there as Lesnar only has to play defense and run the clock out to win the title. Kurt puts the ankle lock on Brock outside but back inside we go. Brock runs again so Kurt rams him into the steps. Angle hits some rolling Germans back in the ring and we hit a minute to go. He hits four Germans but this is taking way too long. Brock kicks him low with 30 seconds left but it’s not seen. Ankle lock with the grapevine is on with 15 seconds left but Lesnar hangs on to win the title and end the show.

Rating: B. This match runs into the exact same problem that is more or less unavoidable for these matches: you can more or less skip the first 55 minutes and you still see the exciting parts. An hour is too long, even when the guys are having an entertaining match. This was good, but like I said the vast majority of it is just waiting for Angle to make his big comeback. However it does fly by as taking out commercials it runs about 46-48 minutes. Good match, but not a good idea for TV.

Time for some Shawn Michaels, from Wrestlemania XXI.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

This was when Angle was the wrestling machine so this should be awesome. Kurt takes in the YOU SUCK chants because that’s how awesome he is. I should mention the set as it has the Hollywood sign on one side and a movie marquee on the other side which says Now Playing and then the match, making it feel all the more special. They stare it down to start until Shawn slaps him in the face.

Angle takes it to the mat and rides Shawn to frustrate him. Shawn gets to a rope and gives Kurt a look like “o………..k then time for a new plan.” Michaels grabs a headlock takeover to slow things down but the fans are behind Kurt. Kurt fights up but can’t escape the hold without using the ropes. Nice storytelling there with Shawn gladly going to the ropes but Angle going to them out of frustration.

Off to a short arm scissors by Shawn for a bit but Angle uses raw power to lift Shawn up into the air. However, since Shawn had that move used on him back in 1992 by British Bulldog, he knows how to roll through into a sunset flip for two. See, THAT is how you play to older fans with some awesome psychology. Back to the headlock as Angle is getting frustrated by Michaels dominating the mat.

Angle takes it into the corner to brawl with Shawn but Shawn ties him up instead. This is also a callback to Wrestlemania XII where Shawn used the exact same strategy on Bret. Angle grabs a quick ankle lock but Shawn rolls through and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor. Angle loads up the announce table but opts to pick up Shawn in the Angle Slam and ram Shawn back first into the post to take over again.

Back in and Angle gets two off a suplex before putting on a body vice with a chinlock. The fans are split here but Shawn fights up with some chops to take over. Kurt will have none of that though and suplexes Shawn down to stop the comeback bid. Another belly to belly gets two and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back. Michaels gets up again and they slug it out with Angle taking Shawn down with a hard clothesline.

Shawn blocks a superplex attempt but Kurt rolls away from the top rope elbow. There go Angle’s straps but Shawn counters the Angle Slam and backdrops Kurt to the floor. Shawn goes up and half dives/half falls onto Angle with a cross body. As they get back in, Angle tries his German suplex off the apron but Shawn kicks him low like a good former villain. With Angle on the announce table, Shawn hits a gorgeous springboard spinning cross body to send Angle onto the floor as the table doesn’t break.

Both guys make it in on different sides of the ring at nine. Angle is bleeding from the mouth. They slug it out again with Shawn taking over. There’s the forearm and nip-up as Shawn’s back is perfectly fine all of a sudden. Now the big elbow hits but the superkick is countered into the ankle lock but Shawn FINALLY makes the rope. The Angle Slam is rolled through but Angle counters into the ankle lock but Shawn counters into a rollup for two. Another superkick is caught and there’s the Angle Slam for two.

To show how angry Kurt is, he puts his straps up just so he can take them down all over again. In a scary spot, Angle tries the moonsault but Shawn doesn’t roll away far enough, sending Angle’s face into Shawn’s side. Shawn goes up again but Angle runs up the corner for the belly to belly off the top. Somehow that only gets two and Angle yells at Shawn, talking about how Michaels’ days are done. Shawn shoves him back and superkicks Angle down but he can’t follow up.

The cover eventually gets two and Shawn isn’t sure what to do now. He slowly stands up but Angle grabs the ankle lock again. Shawn tries to kick Angle off but Kurt won’t let go. They’re in the middle of the ring with Shawn writhing in pain. Angle puts on the grapevine and Shawn is all but dead. He hangs on for as long as he can before FINALLY tapping out to give Angle the win.

Rating: A+. Angle and Shawn at Wrestlemania having a masterpiece. Who would have ever seen that coming? The match was excellent all around and the match never stopped being great. They would have another masterpiece at Summerslam which again shouldn’t surprise anyone. Great match here and definitely worth seeing if you haven’t before.

Angle had to win the TNA Title at some point so why not Slammiversary 2007?

TNA World Title: Chris Harris vs. Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe vs. Christian Cage

Title is vacant coming in. The rules here are a bit complicated. It’s a reverse ladder match as you have to hang the title above the ring to win. Before you can do that though, you have to become eligible by getting a pinfall or submission on someone else. If you get pinned or submit, you have to go to a penalty box at ringside for two minutes. Officially Angle has never won the title coming in, even though he won last month. Harris is a surprise entrant. After full entrances for everyone and Big Match Intros we’re finally ready to go.

It’s a huge brawl to start with Cage and goofy Styles (horrible time for him) double teaming Harris. AJ tries to lay down so Christian can be eligible but Angle makes the save. Instead it’s the great AJ dropkick to put Harris down as Angle and Joe fight on the floor. Styles tries a rollup on Christian for two and Christian is livid. Joe breaks up AJ’s moonsault attempt and sends him hard into the barricade.

Back in and Joe nails a running boot to Christian’s chest to put him down but Harris throws Joe through the ropes and onto Angle. Harris can’t hit the Catatonic on Christian but settles for a full nelson slam. AJ tries a tornado DDT but gets caught in the Catatonic to make Harris eligible and send Styles to the box. Joe throws a ladder over the top rope to take out Christian and Harris, giving us Angle vs. Joe. Again.

Joe tries the Facewash on Angle but gets caught in Rolling Germans for his efforts. Christian comes back in and gets caught in the ankle lock and the Clutch at the same time. AJ gets out of the box to make the save as Harris comes back in as well for a big brawl. Christian tries to suplex Harris onto the ladder but gets crotched instead, followed by AJ’s moonsault into a reverse DDT on Harris for two. Styles cleans house but the Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock. AJ nips up into a hurricanrana before sending Harris throws AJ over the top onto Chrisitian on the ladder in a big crash.

Harris tries to climb up and hang the belt but Angle brings him down with the Slam for the pin to be eligible. Joe catches Christian in the release Rock Bottom out of the corner and an Island Driver (modified White Noise) takes AJ down. The MuscleBuster gets two as Angle makes the save and there goes the referee. Angle taps out to the Clutch and thankfully Joe doesn’t break the hold. Christian breaks it up with the ladder and steals the pin. Harris is out of the box, Angle goes in and Christian is now eligible.

Joe and Christian go up the ladder with the Samoan taking him down with a huge Diamond Cutter onto the title. Harris goes up the ladder instead but he has to knock Joe down with a belt shot. The same thing happens to Christian but AJ springboard dropkicks the ladder over for the save. Angle is out of the box. Joe and AJ climb on top of the box (just above the top rope) with AJ low blowing out of the Clutch. Joe flips AJ over and through a table on the floor for a HUGE crash.

Now it’s Harris vs. Christian on the cage with Harris getting the better of it. He dives off the cage to take Angle down with a clothesline but has to beat people up before climbing the ladder. Ladder shots put Christian and Kurt down but Christian is up for the save. Christian goes up top but Angle puts on the ankle lock on the ladder. That doesn’t last long as they fight up top until Harris spears Christian down. Angle is all alone and hangs the belt for the win and the title.

Rating: B. It’s a total mess but it’s TNA’s total mess. I can’t imagine people would complain about Angle winning the title as he’s the biggest star in the company and had to really win the title eventually. The fact that Joe wasn’t even eligible for the title is kind of a downgrade for him but he’d have his day eventually.

One more World Title, from Hardcore Justice 2011.

TNA World Title: Sting vs. Kurt Angle

Big match intros fill in some time. Sting is in gray which is a weird look on him. Sting grabs the arm to start as this seems like it’s going to be a feeling out process to start. I think they’re going for the big epic match but that’s just not going to happen here. Angle grabs a headlock which gets him nowhere. The dueling chants are already going and Sting’s paint is like 1/3 off less than two minutes in.

Now Angle works on the arm. The gray isn’t working for Sting as it looks like he’s dusty. Sting escapes and works on the leg to set up for the Scorpion. Angle fights back and hammers away. The champ backdrops him over the top and out to the floor as things slow down a bit. Out to the floor for the usual railing stuff. Back inside and Angle grabs a Samoan Drop for two.

There’s a seated reverse chinlock as Angle works on the back a lot. Off to a slightly modified version of the same chinlock after a few quick covers. Sting pops out of the corner with a clothesline and both guys are down. DDT gets two for the champ. Angle pops off the belly to belly for the same. Sting grabs the Death Drop and you would think Tenay was ordering lunch. Actually scratch that as picking the chicken salad would be more emphatic than that.

Rolling Germans by Angle get two. Tenay sounds like he doesn’t care at all about these covers and near falls. Moonsault misses so Sting hits an Angle Slam for two. There’s the Scorpion which isn’t sat down on at all. He finally makes a rope but Sting hits the Splash but the second one misses. Angle Slam hits for two and no reaction from anyone. Kurt charges at Sting in the corner but his shoulder hits the post.

Sting throws on the ankle lock and they speed things up a bit. Angle puts on the Scorpion Deathlock because that’s how Angle matches roll. Here are some more rolling Germans and Kurt grabs the ankle lock. Sting rolls through for two. And there goes the referee due to a misses enziguri by Kurt. Well it IS a TNA main event. Heeee’re Hulk with a chair. He gets the best reaction of the night and sets to pop Sting with the chair. Angle grabs it from him and Hogan leaves. Kurt blasts Sting with the chair and the Angle Slam gives him the world title.

Rating: C+. Good match overall but the crowd did not care for the most part and neither did Tenay. Not a horrible match but they didn’t get going like I think they wanted to. The finishers were never going to finish it and we were just waiting on the ref bump for the screwy ending. Good enough match but Kurt has had better matches in his sleep.

Angle did something that had never been done before. From King of the Ring 2002.


Kurt Angle vs. Hulk Hogan

This show just kind of sucks and I have a freaking hour to go in it. We fight over technical stuff to start. What I mean by that is Angle does and Hogan just does power stuff. Hogan keeps taking control despite not actually doing anything. Hogan goes for the hair piece and gets a shot in the red and yellow balls. I guess there’s one of each.

Ross says Hogan is as American as apple pie. That’s true. He’s overrated, strange looking, he’s stayed too long, he doesn’t do anything, he gets on people’s nerves, he lies, he cheats, he steals, he cheats on his wife and he tries to be too young. He’s a REAL AMERICAN! Hogan, apparently tired after the work from throwing punches and putting his hand to his ear, is put into a chinlock. Hogan HULKS UP and hits the big boot but instead of the legdrop he pulls the wig off.

After Angle runs, Hogan goes for the legdrop but Angle catches it into the ankle lock. Hogan actually taps and the fans are stunned. That helps the match about a full letter. Ross tries to save Hogan by saying that he held on as long as humanly possible, which is apparently about 15 seconds. Ross can’t remember Hogan ever tapping. That’s just amusing.

Rating: C-. Angle carried this thing completely. Hogan is just a waste here, but to his credit, he tapped. Had he not, this would have ended any chance this show has. Him tapping was right though and it made Angle look much stronger. I mean, can you imagine Hogan tapping out in 1987? Probably not because tapping out wasn’t a thing yet but you get the idea.

You know what sounds awesome? The Olympic Hero vs. the MMA Cowboy of Death. From No Way Out 2006.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. The Undertaker

It’s the remix for Angle’s music here which I never liked. That title just looks AWESOME on him. He was a guy that was incredibly valuable to have on the roster for instances such as this. Batista was hurt and so they needed a credible champion. Angle is someone they could throw the title on and have it be completely realistic. That’s always a great thing and it worked perfectly here.

Taker literally takes four minutes for his entrance. Think he’s taking long enough? Cole’s voice sounds like it’s giving out. Angle tries to get a hold on him early on and Taker goes to the ropes. That’s a bit odd to see I’d think. Angle hits the floor when nothing works. Cole says neither of them have ever tapped. What the heck has he been watching for the seven years Angle has been in the company? He’s lost an Ultimate Submission match and Jericho made him tap on Raw once. Also Benoit made him tap multiple times. Yeah that’s nonsense.

Taker works a headlock which is odd to see him using. Off to the arm and a short arm scissors which gets him nowhere. They’re going back and forth here and it’s working for the most part. Definitely a slow build as we have nearly half an hour to go and no more matches. Old School connects and Taker busts out a Downward Spiral of all things for two.

Snake Eyes hit but Angle hits a SWEET release German for one. The dueling chants begin which makes sense as these are both faces. There’s some chick at ringside that screams louder than Melina. Taker gets knocked off the apron and into the railing. Angle dives at him and is caught before being rammed into the post. The apron legdrop is VINTAGE! Back in and Angle blocks a chokeslam with some kicks so Taker just hits him in the face to put him back down.

Angle goes for the knee and gets the post figure four. Solid stuff here so I apologize for the lack of humor. There’s nothing to make fun of. Patrick gives this big lecture to Angle about keeping it in the ring and Angle nods at it. Patrick turns around and Angle is right back out there which was rather funny. They’re building very slowly here but Angle is picking it up a bit.

Back to the floor again with Taker drilling him with knees. Taker’s knee is messed up a bit and this time he’s selling so we’ve got that going for once. It’s noticeable how much more swearing there is here. Angle grabs the legdrop on the apron this time and gets the ankle lock. Angle holds him on the floor against the ten count, breaking at seven and then breaking the count before going right back to the ankle. That’s sweet stuff there.

We hit the ring again and Taker is caught in another leg lock for a bit. More dueling chants start up. Taker counters mounted punching with a triangle choke and Angle is in trouble. Amazing that Fedor can’t last 10 seconds in one but Angle can last like 30 in it. We hit the floor again and Angle is in trouble. They’ve broken the count like 10 times so far which isn’t something you see that often. It adds some realism to the match as they’re not ignoring rules for the sake of convenience.

Taker clears off the announce table and then rolls in to break the count again, even though I’m not sure one was going on. Angle grabs Taker and puts him through the other announce table with the Angle Slam out of nowhere. Angle stops the count at 9 including some F Bombs. Back to the floor again with Angle pounding away. Taker wouldn’t have beat the count back in. He reverses Angle and sends him into the steps. GREAT match if you can’t tell that.

Taker goes up but gets caught and takes some punches. Angle sets for a suplex but Taker knocks him back. Angle is all like boy I said I’m suplexing you so I’m suplexing you and runs up the corner to throw Taker down in a belly to belly. Somehow that only gets two. Fans are way into this. Angle throws more punches so Taker kicks him in the face. Sometimes you can’t beat the simple stuff.

Chokeslam is countered into the ankle lock and Taker is reeling. Taker can’t shove him off so he pulls him in, grabs the head and locks on the triangle choke again. Angle reverses that and hooks the ankle lock one more time. Taker rolls through and finally gets out of it. Chokeslam mostly hits but Taker kind of dropped him which might have been intentional due to the ankle. That gets two as I’m loving this stuff.

Last Ride is reversed into a sunset flip and Angle grabs the ankle lock AGAIN for like what, the fifth time? Yeah two in the previous sequence and two on the floor. Dang man. Taker can’t get the ropes so he kicks Angle off AGAIN. Angle Slam connects for TWO. Sweet merciful crap this is awesome. Angle pulls down the straps as Taker sits up in a great visual.

They slug it out and Taker sends him in and grabs the Tombstone. Angle reverses and Taker reverses and ANGLE reverses into the SIXTH Ankle lock, this time with the grapevine attached. Taker raises his hand to tap and he’s in the middle of the ring. Taker rolls them over and kicks Angle in the face again to become the ONLY person I’ve ever seen to survive the grapevine ankle lock.

Angle slips up behind Taker as he gets up and hits ANOTHER Angle Slam (NINE freaking finishers from Angle if you’re keeping track) and Angle rolls him up but Taker busts out (and perhaps debuts) the Hell’s Gate (not called that yet and still called a triangle choke here. Thank you martial arts master Tazz) and Angle is in big trouble. Angle is almost out and after the second arm drop he pops up and jumps over into a cradle while the choke is still on and gets the three! Taker thinks he’s won and Angle is DONE. Post match Taker says he has Angle’s number. I guess he’ll text the rematch request.

Rating: A+. Screw Meltzer and his love of Japanese guys and his cruiserweight nonsense. THIS is your match of the year. These two beat the tar out of each other and it was nothing but awesome the whole way. For some reason (Angle leaving for TNA) they never had the big rematch. THIS should have been the main event of Mania rather than a 9 minute triple threat with Angle dropping the belt to that pest Rey so that Eddie could have his second moment at Mania.

Both guys looked awesome out there and they threw everything they had at each other and then the ending worked perfectly. Both guys more or less lost and it lets Taker keep his credibility. Much like the Benoit match at the 03 Rumble, Taker didn’t get beat so much as he got caught. That’s a very key thing and it helps a lot here. Excellent match and well worth going out to see.

Is there anything else we could wrap this up with? I’ve talked about it enough. From Royal Rumble 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Team Angle is immediately ejected to make sure it’s one on one. Benoit grabs a headlock to start before trying the Sharpshooter to send Angle to the floor. Back in and Angle goes for the ankle but gets dropkicked away. Benoit grabs a kind up reverse Figure Four but Angle grabs the rope. This is all holds/counter holds so far. Benoit gets sent shoulder first into the post followed by an Angle suplex for two.

They chop it out with Benoit taking over and hitting a reverse clothesline to take Angle down. Angle drops Benoit across the top rope but gets guillotined down by the Canadian. They head to the apron with Benoit DDTing him down onto the side of the ring. The champion has a busted nose now. Back in and the Swan Dive misses but Benoit rolls out of the Angle Slam. There’s the Sharpshooter to Angle who eventually gets to a rope. A belly to back suplex gets two for Chris but Angle snaps off an overhead belly to belly (just one so far).

Back to the floor where Benoit gets dropped onto the barricade to further mess with his head. Off to a rear naked choke back inside so Kurt can overly loudly call some spots. Angle catches Benoit in another belly to belly followed by a belly to back for two. Back to the chinlock for a bit until a double clothesline puts both guys down. Benoit rolls some Germans but so does Angle. And people wonder why their necks were held together by tape.

Benoit gets the final German but Angle runs the ropes to hit the belly to belly off the top to put both guys down. That gets two but the Angle Slam is countered into the Crossface. Angle gets the rope, so Benoit shifts to an ankle lock. Angle reverses into one of his own and now Benoit is in trouble. Benoit goes to kick off but instead grabs another Crossface. Kurt counters into a rollup but Benoit put the Crossface on the other (right) arm this time. Angle stands up and hits the Angle Slam but can’t immediately cover.

Angle takes the straps down but another German attempt is countered into a rollup for two. They trade HARD Germans until Benoit hooks a release German to put both guys down. Before anyone asks, the difference between this and the previous match with the suplexes is how hard these are. Steiner looked like he was at a dance recital but here they look like they’re trying to kill one another. Not to mention there’s OTHER STUFF in between the suplexes.

Benoit hits the longest diving headbutt you’ll EVER see, but he can’t cover because of his head getting jarred like that. Angle counters the Crossface into a reverse powerbomb onto the buckle. The Angle Slam gets a VERY close two as the crowd is losing their minds. Back to the Crossface but Angle rolls through into the ankle lock. Benoit rolls over but can’t break the hold. He kicks Kurt off but Angle goes right back to the hold. Benoit keeps trying to kick him off but Angle hooks the grapevine and Benoit has to tap.

Rating: A+. That’s your match of the year right there people. Oh wait according to Meltzer there was some match in Japan that no one but him ever saw and that has to be better than this right? Anyway, these two DESTROYED each other with some absolutely amazing counters and awesome sequences out there while suplexing the tar out of each other. This both guy’s best match ever, and that’s saying A LOT.

Angle didn’t have as many masterpieces as some people probably think he did, but the guy is going to give you one of the best matches of the night no matter what show it’s on. There are a lot of great matches I could have put on here but you have to cut it off somewhere. He can go with anyone and at the end of the day you don’t argue with a gold medal. The fact that he can talk with the best of them makes him even greater. If you’ve never seen it, find some of his promos from 2000. They’re pure greatness.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – September 19: Super Crazy

He’s Super! He’s Crazy! He’s Super Crazy!

Super Crazy got his start all the way back in 1988 when he was fourteen. He would actually get a spot on Raw on November 3, 1997 as Super Loco.

Light Heavyweight Title Tournament First Round: Super Loco vs. Aguila

Aguila (Essa Rios) fires off some kicks in the corner and a springboard armdrag to start but walks into a spinwheel kick to the face. A moonsault into another armdrag puts Loco down and another flippy armdrag drops Loco. Super gets caught up in the ropes and winds up going face first into the barricade. Aguila nails a huge flip dive to the floor but gets caught with a springboard spinwheel kick to the face.

Loco botches another springboard so he clotheslines Aguila off the top rope instead. He can’t quite get Aguila up in a surfboard and has to settle for a choke instead. A backdrop puts Aguila on the floor and a cartwheel into a dive drops him again. Back in and Loco totally misses a corkscrew dive, allowing Aguila to dropkick him to the floor, followed by a big moonsault press. Aguila hits a spinning top rope splash for the pin to advance.

Rating: C+. The high spots were great and this stuff didn’t happen in WWF at this point. However, the botches really brought this down and Loco looked totally off his game here. Aguila did some great high spots but they were very flippy in nature instead of making a lot of contact.

We’ll pick things up in ECW with the feud that made Crazy’s career. From Guilty As Charged 1999.

Yoshihiro Tajiri vs. Super Crazy

Both guys are new to the company. These two fought roughly 90,000 times and this is one of the first. Super Crazy is a high flying luchador and Tajiri is a hard striking wrestler from Japan. He’s clean shaven here but would eventually grow a beard and become one of ECW’s better workers. This is the kind of a match that ECW needed to fill out their pay per view cards and have exciting, non-hardcore matches. Feeling out process to start and Crazy won’t throw a closed fist. We get a very fast paced sequence with both guys taking the other to the mat for arm trap cradles for two each.

A tornado DDT drops Tajiri but he comes back with some very hard kicks to the head to take over. Back up and they trade chops to the chest before Tajiri kicks the knee out. Off to a leg bar on Crazy but he gets to the ropes and bails to the floor. That’s fine with Tajiri who nails a HUGE Asai moonsault. They fight to the apron and Tajiri hooks the Tarantula (a Boston crab over the ropes) but as always it doesn’t last long.

Crazy comes back with a springboard missile dropkick to send Tajiri to the floor followed by a HUGE flip dive to keep Crazy in control. A moonsault off the barricade crushes Tajiri before sending him back inside for a surfboard. Crazy keeps the hold on and bends Tajiri back into a dragon sleeper with the legs still bent back for a PAINFUL looking hold. Back up and Tajiri dropkicks the knee out and hits a huge dive to the floor (with Crazy nice enough to stand there with his arms open so Tajiri could hit him).

Tajiri slowly gets up first and kicks Crazy in the head. Back inside and a spinwheel kick to the face gets two for Tajiri but he comes back with a majistral cradle for two but Tajiri comes back with one of his own for the same. Crazy flips out of a German suplex attempt and hits a moonsault press for two. Tajiri heads outside again and another dive takes him down. Back in and a missile dropkick puts Tajiri down but he rolls through a tornado DDT.

Tajiri gets caught in a reverse tornado DDT but is able to counter a powerbomb into a DDT of his own. Tajiri blocks a moonsault by raising his boots before nailing a sunset bomb for two. Back up and Crazy hits a sitout powerbomb for another two so Tajiri does the same to him. As Crazy is kicking out though, Tajiri keeps his legs around Crazy’s arms and rolls him around the ring. They slug it out until Tajiri hooks a dragon suplex (full nelson suplex) for the pin.

Rating: B+. Yes it was a spot fest, but here’s the difference between this and the other spot fests that I’ve complained about so far: this was all them. There wasn’t a table and chair being brought in every five minutes and there weren’t a bunch of spots that had almost no effect at all. It was two guys doing whatever they could think of with just their bodies and the ring (plus the occasional barricade) to beat each other. Also it was only about twelve minutes instead of double that, meaning it didn’t overstay its welcome. This was very entertaining stuff and the best match ECW has had in awhile.

Again at Living Dangerously 1999.

Super Crazy vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

Tajiri is now from Tokyo. Joey bills this as the final match in the feud with the winner of this match winning the whole thing. Tajiri grabs an armbar before cartwheeling into a monkey flip but Crazy lands on his feet. A standing hurricanrana gets two for Tajiri before they trade fast armdrags and forward flips to another standoff. The fans give them a standing ovation as things start up again.

Tajiri nails his handspring elbow but gets chopped down. Crazy gets launched over the top onto the ramp before Tajiri hits an even bigger flip dive over the top to take Crazy down. An Asai moonsault plants Crazy again but Super comes back with another moonsault onto the ramp. Tajiri counters something Crazy was setting up on the ramp with a hurricanrana but Crazy clotheslines both of them back into the ring. Back in and Crazy hits his triple moonsaults (one from each rope) for two.

A hard kick to the rips drops Tajiri again and a springboard Lionsault gets two more. Yet another moonsault is countered by some knees to the ribs and Tajiri kicks his head off. A baseball slide to the face with Crazy in the Tree of Woe gets two more and a dropkick to the head gets two on Crazy. Back up and Crazy slips off the ropes when trying a springboard. Tajiri gets another near fall off a German suplex but Crazy kicks him low and nails a sitout powerbomb for two.

Another attempt at a powerbomb is countered by what appeared to be a hurricanrana from Tajiri but they just fall down instead. It didn’t look like a botch but it didn’t work right. Back up and Tajiri tries a hurricanrana but Crazy rolls through for the pin out of nowhere. I believe that was supposed to be the finish before they messed up so they just redid it.

Rating: B-. Good fast paced opener here but it’s a far cry from what they did last time. The ending doesn’t do much good for this one either as it felt like we were seeing a second take which really brought things down. The problem here was they had to live up to what they had done before and it just wasn’t happening tonight. Still though, solid opener.

Here’s the match that ECW did over and over again because they were awesome.

Little Guido vs. Super Crazy vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri

This would become a staple of ECW shows for a long time. Tajiri doesn’t have anyone in his corner here. The fans are mostly behind Crazy, who now has Mexican flag inspired attire. Feeling out process to start until Crazy hits a top rope cross body on Guido for two. Tajiri kicks both of them down and goes after Crazy’s knee to take over. Guido gets sent to the ramp, allowing Tajiri to hook a headscissors on Crazy. Super comes back with a springboard missile dropkick but Guido comes in with a springboard cross body for of his own.

Guido and Tajiri make a short lived deal to work on Crazy but Tajiri quickly turns on Guido with a dropkick to the face. More kicks to the legs send Guido to the floor and Crazy puts him in the front row. Crazy dives over the barricade to take him down but Tajiri takes both of them down with a huge Asai moonsault. Sal is in the ring and crushes the non-Italians. Guido nails a middle rope Fameasser to Tajiri and covers Crazy for two.

Tajiri grabs a German suplex for two of his own on Guido before they both head to the floor again. Guido gets dropped ribs first onto the barricade and Tajiri takes him back into the crowd. This time it’s Crazy hitting a huge top rope Asai moonsault over the barricade to take both guys down again. Sal misses a charge and flies through a table to take him out for awhile. Back in and Tajiri puts Crazy in the Tarantula, leaving Crazy wide open for a hard dropkick to the face from Guido.

Crazy pops right back up and puts Tajiri in a surfboard with a dragon sleeper added in. He switches it up to a camel clutch and Guido adds on a Sicilian crab at the same time. Somehow Tajiri doesn’t give up so the hold is broken. Guido hits a quick Tomikaze for two on Crazy but Tajiri puts Guido in the Tree of Woe. A hard baseball slide to the face followed by a top rope moonsault from Crazy is enough to eliminate Guido.

It’s down to Tajiri vs. Crazy as soon as the referee is able to roll the unconscious Guido to the floor. Crazy kicks him down and nails a springboard moonsault for two before hammering away in the corner. The fans are nice enough to count to ten in Spanish as he fires in the right hands.

Tajiri comes right back with the handspring elbow, only to have Crazy nail a quick sitout powerbomb. The fans chant Super Loco but Tajiri counters another powerbomb into a spinning DDT. Crazy is back up first though and nails a reverse tornado DDT for no cover. Instead he loads up the three moonsaults but Tajiri gets his knees up to block the second one. A hard kick to Crazy’s head sets up a brainbuster for the pin.

Rating: B-. This was your usual spotfest but well done. There’s nothing wrong with sending three good high fliers out there to fire up the crowd for awhile. It’s not a great match or anything and the first Crazy vs. Tajiri match was more entertaining, but this was a very fun match and a much better choice than a lot of the nonsense ECW puts on pay per view at times. I wouldn’t mind if Tajiri and Crazy got some higher profile matches after this. Guido is a comedy character and shouldn’t be elevated.

We’ll change things up a bit on ECW on TNN, November 19, 1999.

Jerry Lynn vs. Super Crazy

Nice to them them following up on last week’s angle. The Baldies are waiting for New Jack at the subway. The other Baldies are in a loser leaves ECW match tonight against Rotten and Mahoney. Back to the actual match at hand as Jerry starts fast and sends Crazy to the floor. A big dive takes Crazy out and they head back inside. Crazy tries a moonsault out of the corner ala Daniel Bryan but he doesn’t quite clear Lynn. A backbreaker gets two on Lynn who still has bad ribs.

A powerbomb gets the same but the American hits a German on the Mexican for two. Lynn hits a tornado DDT out of the corner for two and Crazy is in trouble. Jerry goes up but gets shoved off the top and down through a table, which gets two back in the ring. Triple moonsaults get two as Lynn’s ribs are in big trouble. Piledriver gets two as does a brainbuster. Corino runs in with Tajiri and the referee takes some Mist. Tajiri hits a brainbuster on Crazy to put both guys down. Lynn rolls over and gets the pin on Crazy.

Rating: C+. For some reason I liked this. It was fast paced and while the ending was kind of out of nowhere, it fits with the story from last week which is a big improvement over a lot of the stuff you get on here. These guys worked well together but then again I like Lynn a lot which has a lot to do with it.

Let’s combine the matches at Guilty As Charged 2000.

Jerry Lynn/Little Guido vs. Yoshihiro Tajiri/Super Crazy

Lynn isn’t really a surprise as Joey mentioned him as potentially being in league with Tajiri before the match. This would be another match where Lynn is wasted for various reasons, including the match having no point because the idea was to have Crazy vs. Tajiri and now they’re partners for no apparent reason. Lynn’s ribs have finally healed.

It’s Crazy vs. Lynn to get things going and they trade some wristlocks until Lynn takes him down with a flying snapmare. They flip around a bit until Lynn hits a cross body, only to have them trade armdrags to a standoff. After a handshake they trade even more flips and it’s off to Tajiri vs. Guido. Tajiri wants Guido and gets slapped in the face for his efforts, sending him down to the mat. Guido’s powerbomb is countered and Tajiri slaps him in the face, followed by the handspring elbow to take over.

A hard kick to Guido’s face is followed by an even harder chop to his chest but he grabs Tajiri’s arm with the Fujiwara armbar. Guido lets go and it’s back to Lynn who stays on Tajiri’s arm before they screw up a spot in the corner. Tajiri gets in a shot to the head and puts on the Tarantula but Guido makes the save. Crazy comes in and gets two off a German suplex to Guido.

Everyone is sent to the floor and we unleash the dives before Guido throws Crazy into the crowd. Back inside and Lynn gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a baseball slide from Tajiri. Crazy has climbed into the balcony for a big dive onto Guido. Somehow Guido is back on the apron first as Tajiri hammers away on Lynn. A sunset flip out of the corner gets two for Jerry and they trade hurricanranas. Lynn gets two off a German suplex but Tajiri does the exact same thing.

Crazy and Guido come in without tags and Crazy’s team hammers away in the corner, only to get powerbombed down for two each. Guido and Lynn both hit tornado DDTs but Tajiri rolls to the floor. Crazy powerbombs Guido down and hits a springboard moonsault for two. Tajiri sprays green mist in Lynn’s eyes and Crazy DDTs him for two. Crazy and Tajiri hit a double powerbomb for two more on Jerry but Guido breaks up a cover. Guido then lays out Lynn for no apparent reason and Tajiri kicks Crazy for a more apparent reason. Tajiri hits the brainbuster on Lynn for a three count.

Rating: D+. So what was the point of this again? The idea was Tajiri was working with Lynn all along, but it turned out to be a way for Tajiri to beat up Lynn? Corino and company certainly are lucky that Heyman selected Lynn as the partner. Jerry’s fall through the roster continues and it’s rather sad to see.

Rob Van Dam had to vacate the TV Title due to a broken ankle in early 2000 so a tournament was held. Super Crazy made the semi-finals at Living Dangerously 2000.

TV Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Little Guido vs. Super Crazy

The winner faces Rhino for the title. Guido takes him down to start and hits a running dropkick to the head for two. Crazy heads outside and sends Guido and Sal into the crowd. A HUGE Asai moonsault takes down both Italians but Crazy and Guido are quickly back inside. Crazy hits a sunset bomb out of the corner and they’re quickly back outside again. Guido puts on the Fujiwara armbar outside before bringing a chair inside.

Crazy kicks it out of his hands and nails Guido in the head with the chair a few times. There are the ten punches in the corner to the busted open Guido and the invading Sal gets the same. Guido kicks Crazy in the face and Sal takes his belt off to whip Crazy’s back. Sal heads to the floor as Crazy hits a running DDT for two but Guido comes back with a Fameasser.

We get a table thrown in but Guido misses an elbow off of Sal’s shoulders and crashes through the table. Crazy hurricanranas Sal to the floor and grabs a sitout powerbomb to drive Guido onto the broken table. A Lionsault gets a very close two that Joey saw as three, followed by a brainbuster for the pin to advance.

Rating: D+. This was the shortened version of their usual match but with Sal and weapons involved. Unfortunately the match also brought up the usual problems of a tournament: there was no way Guido was going to face Rhino for the title in a heel vs. heel match. The weapons really didn’t need to exist here and brought down what could have been a more entertaining match.

And the finals from later that night.

TV Title: Rhino vs. Super Crazy

The title is vacant coming in and Cyrus, Corino and Victory are at ringside. Crazy hits a springboard dropkick and sends Rhino to the floor for a big flip dive. Back in and Rhino rams him into the buckle over and over but Crazy drops him out to the floor. The fans want Sandman as Crazy dives over the top again to put Rhino down. The monster sends him into the crowd and sets up a table on the floor.

Back in and Rhino launches him over the top and through the table for two back inside. A big powerbomb gets the same and we’ve got another table in the ring. Rhino Gores the table by mistake and Crazy has his opening. Crazy gets two off a high cross body but gets run over by a clothesline. Another powerbomb is countered into a DDT and Crazy hits two moonsaults in a row but Rhino pulls the referee in the way of the third.

Tajiri comes in with the green mist to blind Crazy and a double kick to the head puts him down again. Jack Victory hands in another table as Tajiri kicks Crazy in the head, followed by a Gore in the corner from Rhino. Cue Rob Van Dam with one good leg on the back of his friend Scotty Anton (Scotty Riggs from WCW). Scotty goes after Tajiri as Rob breaks his crutch over Rhino’s back and puts him through the table. Crazy hits a top rope moonsault for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. It was another mess with the weapons and interference being the focus of the entire thing. I’ll give them points for going with someone new as a champion though as Crazy has more than earned a promotion like this. Rhino is clearly the next monster star but it was nice to see someone else get their chance.

One more ECW PPV match at Guilty As Charged 2001.

FBI vs. Unholy Alliance vs. Super Crazy/Kid Kash

Winner gets a Tag Team Title match at some point in the future. The difference here is there are three people in the ring at the same time though it’s still elimination rules. Kash, Mamaluke and Mikey get things going. Mikey slaps hands and laughs a lot before letting the other guys fight. Kash goes to the apron for a springboard but slips and mostly falls off the ropes. He makes up for it with a quick suplex to Whipwreck for two and it’s a three way standoff.

A triple tag brings in Guido vs. Tajiri vs. Super Crazy as ECW somehow manages to get this matchup on another pay per view. Tajiri cleans house with kicks to the head but has to roll out of Guido’s Fujiwara’s armbar. Everything breaks down and the Alliance cleans house with kicks to the head. Super Crazy puts Guido in a surfboard with a choke, Mikey puts Mamaluke in a choke on the mat and Tajiri puts Kash in the Tarantula at the same time for a cool visual.

Crazy lets go to save his partner but the Italians prevent him from diving on the Alliance. Kid helps send the Italians to the floor for a huge Asai Moonsault from Crazy, followed by an even bigger flip dive from Kash. Back inside and Kash hurricanranas Mikey before Crazy misses a dive over the top rope and hits the barricade. Big Sal comes in and splashes Kash, allowing Mamaluke to score the elimination.

On the floor, Tajiri drops Guido ribs first on the barricade as Mikey and Mamaluke head into the crowd. Back in and the Alliance double teams Tony with Mikey pulling Mamaluke’s head back for a big kick from Tajiri. Guido gets thrown off the top but Sal helps out his friends to take over. Mamaluke hits a reverse tornado DDT on Mikey and Guido adds the middle rope Fameasser for two.

Guido spits at Tajiri and the FBI cranks on both of Mikey’s legs. Back up and Mikey hits a Whippersnapper out of nowhere to drop Tony and there’s the hot tag to Tajiri. Guido can’t hit the Kiss of Death and gets caught in an inverted Gory Special. The Italians are both dropped face first onto chairs in the corner for two. Mikey’s Whippersnapper is countered and he gets caught in a double Fujiwara armbar, only to have Tajiri make a save. A double tiger suplex gives the Alliance the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C. Nice match here but it really didn’t need to be a three way. Tajiri and Whipwreck are the best team out there and the fans cared about them, which pretty much makes them by far the best choice for the title shot. It’s not a classic or anything but it did exactly what it was supposed to do.

Crazy would appear at the first ROH show and challenge for the IWA Intercontinental Title from Puerto Rico. From the Era of Honor Begins on February 23, 2002.

IWA Intercontinental Title: Super Crazy vs. Eddie Guerrero

Eddie is freshly off being fired from WWF and the title is vacant coming in. It’s so strange to see them in what looks like a high school gym. Crazy offers a handshake but gets slapped in the face for his efforts. A quick snapmare puts Crazy down and he does the spinning eye rake with the boot. They hit the mat with Eddie holding a headlock until Crazy suplexes him down to escape.

Guerrero wins a slugout and gets two off his own suplex. We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Eddie gets caught in an armdrag. Crazy goes up and dives down with another armdrag before hammering away in the corner. They head outside with Eddie hammering away and planting him with a brainbuster.

The slingshot hilo gets two back inside and Eddie stomps away. Crazy rolls out of a sunset flip and dropkicks Eddie in the back of the head for two. A missile dropkick gets the same but Eddie comes back with a top rope hurricanrana for a near fall of his own. Back up and a spinwheel kick drops Eddie but he plants Crazy with a powerbomb. Three Amigos set up the frog splash but Crazy rolls away and grabs a small package for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. Solid back and forth match here with both guys hitting most of their big spots. This was a weird time for wrestling as companies like ROH and TNA weren’t factors so this was a big drop for Eddie. It was nice to see him put the younger guy over though and that’s matters here.

Time for the TNA appearance. From Weekly PPV #34 on March 5, 2003.

Super Crazy vs. Jerry Lynn

Crazy has Konnan in his corner. Lynn armdrags him into the ropes to start but Crazy armdrags him right back and flips into a crucifix for two. They trade some flips in the corner followed by armdrags for the standoff and applause. Crazy nails a quick clothesline but his powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana to the floor. Lynn dropkicks him off the apron and grabs another hurricanrana off the apron for good measure.

Back in and Crazy kicks him in the head but charges into an elbow to the jaw. Lynn sends him into the buckle before they head outside for a chase. Crazy gets in first and nails his spinwheel kick to knock Jerry back outside. A spinning springboard moonsault drops Lynn again and Konnan is very pleased.

They go inside again for a springboard Lionsault for two but Lynn comes back with a TKO for the same. Konnan distracts Jerry to break up the cradle piledriver, allowing Crazy to plant him for two. A running tornado DDT and Batista Bomb get the same for Crazy. He loads up a top rope hurricanrana but Jerry rolls through for the pin.

Rating: C+. Another decent match here with Crazy flying around but in this case he was just there to make Lynn look good. Konnan wasn’t bad in the manager roll as the fans know him well enough to care and he has the charisma to do whatever he needs. Good match here as Crazy was his usual high flying self.

It was off to WWE now, starting at One Night Stand with an old standard.

Tajiri vs. Super Crazy vs. Little Guido

This is under elimination rules. The whole FBI comes out here, as in 5-6 guys with maybe 2 Italians in there. The innuendo joke gets old fast. These were matches that happened a lot back in the day and they were always International Three Way Dances, as in one guy is from each country. Crazy was a guy that I never was sure if I liked him or not. Foley throws out a little known fact that he and Smothers won tag titles in Japan.

This was ECW’s answer to the luchadores that were stolen by WCW. Joey is in his element here with a bunch of move names as Foley says he can’t keep up with Joey so he’s mostly on his own here. SICK dropkick to a seated Guido from Crazy. These guys are moving like insanity out there (can’t say Crazy is moving like crazy out there).

They hit the crowd and Crazy goes to the balcony and hits an AMAZING moonsault into the crowd before going back into the ring and taking the Tarantula. That moonsault really was amazing and Joey chanting DIOS MIO was hilarious. We haven’t had an American wrestler in a match yet.

There’s the FBI in there and since they have the combined IQ of yogurt, Mikey Whipwreck, Tajiri’s tag partner, comes in and hits the Whippersnapper (second rope Stunner which yes he used before Austin) so Tajiri gets the easy pin to get us down to the Japanese Buzzsaw vs. the Crazy Mexican wrestler. After some more Mikey shenanigans, a top rope moonsault ends this for Crazy.

Rating: C+. Other than the dive this was a total mess. It wasn’t terrible at all but compared to the stuff WCW would pull out, this really wasn’t that great. The dive was indeed awesome though and definitely makes the match. At the end of the day though, you have to have this match at an ECW show.

Crazy got a job out of this performance and would appear at Great American Bash 2005.

Mexicools vs. BWO

Oh where do I begin. Ok so the Mexicools are Juvy, Psicosis and Super Crazy as really stereotypocal Mexicans (ride lawnmowers, carry rakes etc). The BWO is here because at One Night Stand, JBL legitimately beat up Blue Meanie. WWE gave Meanie a job for like two months so he didn’t sue them. This is their only match of note. The BWO comes out on big wheels for absolutely no apparent reason. American Chopper joke maybe?

Juvy vs. Nova starts us off. Things break down and the BWO takes over. Psicosis finally hits a corkscrew plancha to take over on Nova. Back to Juvy as Nova gets beaten down. He Hulks Up (NWO parody remember…..in 2005) and Cole messes up the BWO’s names. Hot tag brings in Richards who cleans house. Side slam gets two on Psicosis. Everything breaks down and Crazy hits a moonsault onto Richards followed by a guillotine legdrop by Psicosis for the pin.

Rating: F. This was on PPV. Once you get that through your heads, you’ll get why this was a failure.

A bit better match from Armageddon 2005.

MNM vs. Mexicools

MNM is John Morrison (Nitro here) and Joey Mercury. The Mexicools are Super Crazy and Psicosis. See, they’re Mexicans and they ride lawnmowers. That’s their gimmick. Mercury vs. Psicosis to start us off. Off to Nitro who doesn’t do any better so it’s off to Mercury again. Ok make that Nitro. Yeah it’s Nitro. Not that I can’t tell them apart mind you. They’re just tagging in and out that much.

Psicosis misses a charge but gets a punch to Mercury’s stomach off the top. Spinwheel kick sends Mercury to the floor and here come the dives. Crazy uses the referee as a launching pad to dive onto MNM in a nice spot. Psicosis loads up the guillotine legdrop but Melina crotches him to shift momentum. Psicosis gets a sunset flip but a blind tag breaks up anything he’s about to get going.

Clothesline gets two for Mercury. Psicosis gets a nice headlock takeover/headscissors to take both guys down. No tag though as Mercury brings Nitro back in. Nitro takes Crazy out which is a smart move because when Psicosis breaks free for a tag attempt there’s no one to tag. Nitro grabs a Cravate and Psicosis still can’t make a tag. Mercury almost jumps into a boot in the stupidest spot ever but he catches himself which is a sigh of relief from me.

Psicosis gets an enziguri and it’s hot tag to Crazy. He sends MNM into each other and fires off some dropkicks for everyone. Tornado DDT gets two on Mercury. Nitro and Psicosis go to the floor and Crazy hits the moonsault after kicking Melina to the floor. Nitro makes a last second save. Crazy gets up and walks into the Snapshot (3D position but Mercury holds him there and Nitro hits a DDT) for the pin.

Rating: B. I know that’s probably high but I really liked this. The Mexicools were flying all over the place at times but it was never to the point where it was just high spots and nothing of actual significance. MNM was good too and Melina in that tiny skirt of hers helped too. Really fun tag match and I’d like to see them get a long match (this was about 9 minutes).

Back to the ECW reunions (kind of) at One Night Stand 2006.

FBI vs. Tajiri/Super Crazy

Guido and Mamaluke here with a guy named Big Guido. The fans all chant welcome back to all four guys, even though some of them were here last year. Mamaluke isn’t tiny like he was back in the day of ECW. Tajiri breaks up a key lock by Mamaluke to tick off the Italians. Joey and Taz make fun of the whole Mexicool idea as the fans chant Nacho Libre. Technical stuff of course to start as that’s what you should expect from these guys.

Short arm scissors goes on and Crazy lifts Mamaluke up ala British Bulldog vs. Shawn Michaels. Taz says it’s like Backlund who is more famous for it I guess. Off to Tajiri (big pop) and Guido with the fans chanting for ECW in general. Guido grabs a very quick Fujiwara armbar but Tajiri gets a rope. That came out of nowhere. Guido really was good when he got going out there.

Tajiri gets something like an inbred cousin of the Tequila Sunrise which doesn’t last long. Tree of Woe for Guido and everything breaks down quickly. Double Tree of Woe and almost stereo baseball slides into the Italians. Crazy tries for the triple moonsaults but totally misses the bottom rope one and Mamaluke saves Guido from the others. Asai moonsault takes out the Italians though and everyone is down.

Big Guido finally gets into this and beats up Crazy like there’s nothing there. Crazy vs. Mamaluke now and Tony (Mamaluke’s first name if I missed that) throws on some fast submissions which get him nowhere. Guido kicks Crazy in the face and Tajiri is like GIMMICK INFRINGEMENT and kicks the Italians in half.

One man flapjack by Crazy sets up the tag to Tajiri and the kicks are on again. Octopus goes on Mamaluke as this has been about 1.1 sided. Handspring elbow takes out the Italians and a big kick to Guido gets two as it all breaks down again. Double Tarantula to the Italians as this is shifting to 1.05 sided. The good guys (I guess) try to take out Big Guido with kicks and that actually works. Some giant. Crazy gets taken down so Tajiri beats up the Italians for a bit until they catch him in a double Fisherman’s Buster to end it.

Rating: C. Really not sure if I agree with that ending as Tajiri was WAY more popular than anyone else in there. The Italians were a team that was funny when they had the joke right but then towards the end they blew it by making them just a regular tag team. Really not sure I get the ending there but not a bad match at all.

Here’s a one off match from Raw on January 22, 2007.

Super Crazy vs. Chris Masters

This is due to Crazy saving someone from an attack last week. Masters hammers him down to start but Crazy comes back with a cross body for two. He escapes a quick Masterlock attempt but gets caught in a wheelbarrow suplex. We hit the chinlock before a big slam gets two for Masters. Super comes back with a clothesline and the spinwheel kick followed by the standing moonsault for two. Chris avoids a charge in the corner and puts on the Masterlock, only to have Crazy fall back on him for the fast pin.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad as power vs. speed continues to be an idea that you just cannot screw up. Crazy can move with the best of them and Masters is a more than adequate power guy. These two actually had a small feud with neither guy getting the better of it, but at least the match wasn’t bad.

Crazy wouldn’t do much more in WWE so we’ll jump ahead for one more match. He would wrestle in Japan for a few years after this and still is to this day. Here’s Crazy in Pro Wrestling Noah on March 8, 2014.

Xtra Large vs. Jonah Rock vs. Super Crazy

Crazy has a belt here which I believe is a Tag Team Title. Rock sends him out to the floor but Crazy trips up Large and hits a high cross body for two on Rock. Jonah runs both guys over and splashes them in the corner for two on each. Rock puts Large in a camel clutch but Crazy dropkicks him in the head for the save. Large nails a missile dropkick on Rock but gets armdragged to the floor. A dropkick puts Rock outside and Large hits a shooting star off the top to take both guys down. Rock is sent into the crowd but Large misses a corkscrew plancha, allowing Crazy to hit a Michinoku Driver for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was a decent three way and Rock wasn’t half bad out there. Xtra Large (the smallest guy in the match actually) was your standard flippy guy but he could make them look good. Rock has a decent look and could be something with some more polishing. Crazy was the most well rounded here and seemed to be a heel here, which isn’t something you often see.

Super Crazy is a guy that has found his skillset and ran with it. He can fly very well but has more stuff to him than that. It’s a style that is always going to work and it’s done quite well for a near thirty year career now. I liked Crazy more than I remembered which is always a nice surprise.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – September 18: Jamie Noble

Today we’re looking at another small guy: Jamie Noble.

Noble started in late 1999 so we’ll pick things up at the 3rd Annual Brian Pillman Memorial Show in 2000.

HWA Cruiserweight Title: Shark Boy vs. Jamie-San

HWA is the Heartland Wrestling Association out of Cincinnati, which served as a developmental territory for both WCW and the WWF over the years. Shark Boy is defending and Jamie-San is Jamie Noble. The footage is pretty low quality and there’s no commentary here at all. ECW/WCW goon Tony Marinara is with Jamie here for some reason. They trade wristlocks to start and Shark Boy gets two off an O’Connor Roll, giving us a stalemate. Time for some technical stuff with a nice little chain wrestling sequence leading to stalemate the sequel.

Back up and Sharky armdrags him down and Jamie bails to the floor. Jamie gets back in, only to be bitten on the trousers. Marinara gets the same and it’s back to the floor for healing. Shark Boy breaks up their meeting with a nice dive but Jamie pulls him off the apron and sends him into the barricade. Jamie is supposed to be Japanese but he sounds like a hayseed whenever he talks trash, killing the idea dead. Sharky takes a running clothesline in the corner but comes out with a spinning sunset flip for two.

Jamie kind of misses a middle rope dropkick for two and we hit the chinlock. Really basic stuff so far but it’s not bad. It’s strange to see Shark Boy as just a guy (who happens to think he’s a shark) instead of a cult favorite. The hold stays on for a good while, which is a pretty big waste of Jamie’s talents in the time they have. The fans are WAY into Shark Boy here so maybe the cult favorite aspect is still around.

The champion finally comes back by sending Jamie into the corner and puts him down with a facebuster. There are ten punches in the corner and a middle rope hurricanrana gets two for the champion. The Dead Sea Drop (more commonly called Diamond Dust, flipping Stunner off the middle rope) is countered into a reverse layout DDT (Christian uses it a lot) for two. Jamie misses a top rope headbutt so Sharky grabs a sleeper, only to be rammed into the corner, putting him in perfect position for the Dead Sea Drop and the pin to retain.

Rating: C. This was fine. The matches tonight are going to depend on who is in the ring as I’ll be harsher on indy guys than I will be on big time talent. It’s nice to see indy guys who have talent out there like Shark Boy as some matches from this level can be DREADFUL, which I’m sure we’ll hit at some point tonight. This was a nice little match though and both guys looked solid in the ring.

We’ll hit some WCW now, starting at New Blood Rising with Jamie as Jamie-San of the Jung Dragons.

3 Count vs. Jung Dragons

This would open about 19 Thunders in a row. Tank Abbott is their Rikishi and dances with them. Ok to be fair, this was freaking hilarious. The only Dragon that is known is the masked one who would become Jamie Knoble. Three Count has one guy that meant nothing, Shannon Moore and Shane (Gregory) Helms. This is a double ladder match where the Dragons are trying to get a recording contract so 3 Count can’t record again and 3 Count is trying to get their gold record back.

You have to tag here and it’s a ladder match. They stack up a ladder in the corner and do a ton of stuff with that. Both teams hit a springboard Doomsday Device as this is a fun match but you can tell nothing is ever going to go anywhere. Noble does a HUGE dive off the ladder to the floor. Oh and Yang cut his hair and became the resident redneck on Smackdown. This isn’t bad but it’s certainly is entertaining.

And then 3 Count stops to dance. Jamie hits a nice rana and the other two hit a double splash off the ladders. Jamie gets the record but it’s not over yet. Abbott gets the record and we keep going a bit more. I’d love to hear the explanation to a record company that they lost their contract in a professional wrestling ladder match. Kaz and Helms sprint up the ladders but Abbott shoves both guys over. Karagis climbs up and gets the contract. Soon after Jamie would be unmasked and Karagis would team up to become a third team. Abbott leaves with the contract and record.

Rating: B. Solid stuff here although it made limited sense with the whole double prize thing but that’s WCW for you. These six guys would open just about every show there was without ever getting anywhere at all for it and while the matches were solid, people just got sick of seeing them. I know I did.

And another ladder match at Starrcade 2000.

3 Count vs. Jung Dragons vs. Knoble and Karagias

There’s a lot to get through here. This is a three team ladder match but the winner is gets a Cruiserweight Title shot against champion Chavo Guerrero, who will be on commentary. I’m very surprised that we haven’t seen Chavo before this as he’s been around since the mid-90s and is a pretty talented guy. He’s also Eddie’s nephew if the name sounds familiar. I’m not sure how the title shot (which is for a later date rather than tonight) is going to work given that a team wins here rather than an individual. It might be a three way dance, it might be a handicap match or it might be whichever team member pulls the contract down.

As for who is who in this match, these six guys used to be on two three man teams who fought each other for the better part of six months without ever advancing up the card at all (nice job WCW). 3 Count is Shane Helms and Shannon Moore and they’re a boy band ala the Backstreet Boys. The Jung Dragons are Kaz Hayashi and Yang and they’re just Japanese guys. Jamie Knoble and Evan Karagias used to team with the Dragons and 3 Count respectively before splitting off and forming their own team.

You have to tag in this match for no apparent reason other than WCW doesn’t get the concept of a match like this. Shannon and Kaz get things going and head to the mat very quickly before slamming into each other and seemingly knocking themselves out for a second. The ever so caring fans think it’s boring because the guys might have concussions and therefore aren’t doing anything for ten seconds.

Back up and Shannon heads for the ladder but Karagias breaks it up before Moore can get there. Off to Yang vs. Helms but everyone says screw the tagging stuff and heads out into the aisle for the ladder. 3 Count pulls a fast one though and pulls out their own ladder with everyone else in the aisle. The Dragons make the save though, only for Knoble and Karagias to take them down and go up, but the Dragons slam the ladder down onto him. Yang adds a moonsault onto the ladder and the Dragons for good measure to get the crowd into the match.

Jamie and Evan set up a ladder on the middle rope before sending Shane face first into the steel. Kaz is dropped head first onto the ladder as well before Noble brings in another ladder. Knoble and Karagias get in an argument over who gets the contract, allowing Yang to take both guys down. Yang puts Shannon on the ladder and catches him diving into a gutbuster. Shane throws Yang to the floor and hits a BIG spinning dive to take both guys down. Kaz dives on Shane and Evan dives on everyone, followed by Shannon diving on everyone plus Evan.

Jamie goes up the ladder but Yang gets back in and shoves the ladder over, sending Jamie down onto the pile of guys at ringside. Yang puts another ladder in the rungs of the standing ladder, making a platform between the ropes and the standing ladder. Evan walks on said platform and catches a springboarding Kaz in a powerslam to the mat. Shannon dives off the platform to take Evan out before Helms hits a neckbreaker to take Knoble off the ladder. Shannon breaks up the platform and puts up another ladder so four people can climb at once.

Knoble powerbombs Shane off one ladder, leaving Shannon and Yang fighting on the top, until Moore hits a neckbreaker to bring Yang down. Jamie goes up but Leia Meow, the Dragons’ mistress, pulls him down. Even brings in a third ladder but Yang shoves him down to the floor. The Dragons load up a big scaffold using four ladders but get knocked down as another brawl breaks out. Kaz kicks Knoble off the scaffold but gets knocked down by Karagias. It’s Helms and Yang on the scaffold now but here come their partners as well. Shannon headscissors Yang down and 3 Count pulls down the contract at the same time.

Rating: B. There’s your match of the night right there. I don’t have to watch the rest of the show and it’s very clear that this isn’t going to be topped. That’s WCW’s problem at the end of the day: these six guys fought FOREVER and never got to move up the card at all. They never fought for the tag titles or a single title other than the Cruiserweight Title or anything like that at all. Instead they were tasked with going out there and tearing the house down while breaking their backs so that the “stars” could get the glory. That’s WCW in a nutshell and it’s a big part of why they went out of business.

Noble would head to WWE and have a Cruiserweight Title shot at King of the Ring 2002.

Cruiserweight Title: Jamie Noble vs. Hurricane

This was either Noble’s first match or at least his first feud. Oh ok this is his second. Seriously, the recap is still going. It’s getting more time than the opening video. Oh and the heels unmasked him which Burchill is still trying to do. IT’S STILL GOING! I have absolutely no interest in this match at all. Hurricane was running around chokeslamming people. Nidia thinks she means something. That’s just amusing.

There’s a “she’s a crack w****” chant going as we flash back to ECW. She tries to trip Hurricane and misses. You grab the big white thing. It’s how you got a job more than likely as it certainly isn’t for your looks and talent. Oh Tuesday is the Divas Undressed thing. It was a lingire thing that went nowhere. There were some ok looks but that’s about it. As you can tell, I’m not talking much about the match.

This division and title were just jokes and it’s good that the title isn’t coming back. Let it go people. Oh dear we begin the sex jokes about Hurricane and why Nidia dumped him. I hate those. Oh dang it they’re using sleepers. I can barely stand the thought of this match already and they’re just boring me to death. This division was just a freaking waste. Wait a minute. This is a Smackdown match. WHY ARE LAWLER AND ROSS CALLING IT???

We have acknowledged that Tazz and Cole, the SMACKDOWN ANNOUNCERS are in the building, but instead we get Ross and Lawler who have nothing to do with these guys or their show talking about the match. What in the heck is wrong with this? Hurricane and Nidia fight over his cape. Hurricane suplexes Noble over the ropes and he lands on his leg. Dang it he’s getting up so we have to keep going. The main problem here is Nidia.

She won’t freaking shut up and she’s just annoying. Hurricane hits a swinging neckbreaker from the top rope. This match just needs to end. It’s all highspots and Nidia and only one of those things are interesting. Noble kicks out of the chokeslam which stuns the crowd. For some reason they’re into this. Hurricane crotches himself on the top and Noble powerbombs him for the title while Nidia shoves his foot off the ropes. They make out way too much after the match.

Rating: D-. And it passes for the highspots. This was just freaking pointless and of course they gave it 10 minutes. See, in WCW, this was successful because there WERE NO STORIES. It was all highspots and no stupid ugly women screaming all the time. Learn from that Vince.

Title defense from Vengeance 2002.

Cruiserweight Title: Jamie Noble vs. Billy Kidman

At this point, the belt means jack. It’s the guy wins title after being on “an impressive roll as of late”, holds it for like three months while never defending it, another guy goes “on an impressive roll as of late” and normally he wins the title. This would be the first major, and I use that term more loosely than Lita after a bottle of Jack, title defense for Noble though, so there’s more or less no way he loses here.

That and I reviewed the match where he did lose it already so yeah this isn’t in any doubt at all. Wow absolutely no one cares here. We get the line about Noble not being your traditional cruiserweight as he uses a ground based attack and isn’t a high flier. Well duh, he’s a heel champion. Has there ever been a high flier that’s a heel? Only an idiot would book that? Kidman goes up top. I wonder if he’s about to GET READY TO FLY.

I really could not be less interested in this. Yet I’m writing a review of it. There’s something extremely wrong with me I think. How in the world did Noble win the ROH Title for a month? Was that like a massive rib or something? Noble messes up Kidman’s shoulder to try to make people care. To be fair, Kidman gets some pops in there.

Oh some guy named Rey Mysterio debuts Thursday. So four months you got Ortn, Cena, Batista and Mysterio. Not bad. Kidman doesn’t tap to an armbar. Kidman goes for an enziguri. It lands on Noble’s back. Wow this is making my head hurt. Shooting Star misses and Noble rolls him up for two. Noble hits a Tiger Bomb to end this.

Rating: D+. Not bad, but seriously, no one really cared. This just filled in about 8 minutes and wasn’t that good at all. More or less a nothing match that went nowhere at all. Not that it was terrible or anything, but no point at all. That’s the case with way too many cruiserweight matches, but at least they’re not using all of the stories to bog things down.

Jamie would hook up with rival Tajiri for a tag match on Smackdown, September 26, 2002.

Jamie Noble/Tajiai vs. Billy/Chuck

Billy and Chuck are in street clothes. What street that is I’m not sure. Adrian maybe? Billy and Tajiri get started. I don’t remember Tajiri being a heel but he and his partner go after Billy’s knee. Handspring elbow puts Billy down and a big kick gets two. Noble tries to cannonball down onto the leg but Billy kicks him to the floor. Billy still can’t tag as Tajiri knocks Palumbo to the floor. Noble hooks a unique leg lock on Billy’s bad knee.

Can we just watch Torrie slap the mat in that bikini again? Tajiri gets in some shots as we hear about the exclusive contracts between the brands, including Orton being signed to Raw. He was a young cocky heel at this point. I wonder what ever happened to him. Billy manages to get in a kick to Noble and a flapjack allows for the hot tag. Chuck cleans house and tries a powerbomb but Tajiri counters into a victory roll attempt. Chuck holds him in place though and Code Red (Doomsday Device) ends this.

Rating: C. Fine match here and when you throw something together inside of 30 seconds that’s as good as you can ask for. Billy and Chuck had some good chemistry and it worked here. I miss random showdowns like these or the first match and they work pretty well most pf the time, especially when you have talented people in there.

Off to Velocity for the required opponent on January 12, 2003.

Bryan Danielson vs. Jamie Noble

Noble takes him to the mat into a headscissors but Bryan counters into a double arm crank to put Jamie down for two. They trade wristlocks until Danielson takes him down with a headlock. Off to a test of strength with Jamie getting two off a northern lights suplex. A drop toehold puts Danielson throat first into the ropes and a Saito Suplex gets two.

Off to a cross arm choke on Danielson but he slides through Jamie’s legs into a sunset flip for two. We hit the chinlock on Bryan for a bit before he comes back with a running clothesline for two of his own. There’s the backflip out of the corner and Danielson hits a discus forearm to the back of the head. A German suplex gets two on Jamie but he comes back with a quick swinging neckbreaker for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was way better than I was expecting with both guys looking solid out there. Danielson was clearly going to be something special in the future as he was a natural in the ring and moved from one spot to another with ease. It was a surprisingly good match with both guys nailing it.

Jamie decided he wanted Torrie and had a chance to sleep with her if he could beat Billy Gunn at Vengeance 2003.

Billy Gunn vs. Jamie Noble

Jamie brings a briefcase with his “stuff” in it. They actually open it which is creepy. Jamie’s girlfriend Nidia comes out and is mad at him over this clearly. See the criticisms of soap opera stuff that WWE gets? Noble works on his knee so his regular stuff can’t work. Gunn busts out a random Diamond Cutter for two. Didn’t see that one coming. Noble hooks a DDT from the second rope. I liked that.

Nidia puts his foot on the ropes though since she doesn’t want Torrie sleeping with Noble. That makes sense at least. Both girls beat him up. Billy gets rammed into Torrie and gets rolled up for the pin. Torrie says Holy censored and it’s rather amusing. Cole shouting NOBLE GETS TO SLEEP WITH TORRIE cracked me up. He wants to watch. Oh dear.

Rating: D. Bad match on top of a bad angle doesn’t help. Naturally it didn’t happen and Noble and Gunn started teaming together because it’s professional wrestling and of course it doesn’t make sense. Torrie looked hot though so I can’t complain much there. Still though, stupid angle and a stupid match.

Noble got a Cruiserweight Title shot at Royal Rumble 2004.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

Rey is defending. This is during the Nidia is Blind phase which didn’t do anything for anyone. They speed things WAY up to start with Jamie avoiding the 619 and launching Rey into the air to take over. The champ gets draped over the top rope for two and a hard kick to the back gets the same.

Jamie hooks a chinlock which shifts into a seated abdominal stretch. Rey fights up and hits a dropkick and a springboard rana followed by the sitout bulldog for two. He springboards into a gutbuster from Noble for two though and momentum shifts again. Nidia accidentally grabs Noble’s foot, allowing Rey to hit the 619 and springboard legdrop…..for the pin? Huh?

Rating: D+. This was fast paced while it lasted, but those three words are the key: while it lasted. This barely broke three minutes which simply isn’t enough for a PPV title match. Unless I was missing it there was no sign of an injury or anything like that, but the match ends that fast. I have no idea what they were going for here but it didn’t work in any way at all. That’s a shame too because they were going well while it lasted.

Jamie would head to Japan and then ROH for awhile, even beating CM Punk for the ROH World Title in 2005. It wouldn’t last long though and it was back to WWE, including this match at Royal Rumble 2006.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Kid Kash vs. Funaki vs. Jamie Noble vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London

Kid Kash is champion coming in and this is Texas Tornado rules and one fall to a finish. Helms is from Raw but is here because it’s an open invitational. It’s a big brawl to start and everyone gangs up on Helms. I don’t know if there was a delay of some sort or just a really bad sign, but there are dozens if not hundreds of empty seats visible in the lower arena, most of them opposite the hard camera.

Helms gets beaten into the corner but Kash pulls some other people off for no apparent reason. Nunzio slams Kash onto the mat for one Noble gets two on Nunzio off a powerslam as London hits a dropsalt for two on Noble and Nunzio. Wait apparently those red seats are stairs. Those are rather distracting and the seating structure is odd as there’s a group of about eight seats per row then another set of stairs as opposed to most arenas where there are about twice that many in a row. At least the place isn’t as empty as it seemed.

Nunzio hits a slingshot to send Noble into the corner and Funaki adds a bulldog for two. We finally get to the dives with Nunzio diving on a pair of guys, allowing Noble to get two on Kash via a leg lariat. Noble dives on Helms and Nunzio on the floor and Funaki is knocked off the top onto Nunzio and Noble. London kicks Kash to the floor as well and dives on everyone not named Helms with a shooting star off the top.

Back in and London loads up a shooting star press onto Kash but Helms goes up top at the same time and hooks a swinging neckbreaker to bring London down for two. A brainbuster from Kash kills London again but two guys come in for the save. All six guys are back in the ring now and Kash gets two off a Backstabber on Nunzio. Funaki can’t hit a tornado DDT on Noble and gets caught in a gutbuster for trying. Noble gets sent to the floor by Helms and Gregory hits a Shining Wizard out of nowhere for the pin on Funaki and the title.

Rating: C+. What are you expecting to find here? It’s six guys in the ring all at once and going nuts on each other with spots. There isn’t supposed to be any sort of story or flow to it and there certainly wasn’t here. It was the right choice for an opener and the match worked well enough for its purpose. Fine but nothing memorable at all. Helms would hold the title for over a year.

Back to Velocity on March 11, 2006.

Pitbulls vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Funaki

Kash and Funaki get things going with Kash running him over, only to get caught with a hiptoss. Scotty comes in to work on the arm but it’s quickly off to Noble for a stomping in the corner. A neckbreaker gets two on Hotty and everything starts to break down before it’s back to Jamie for a legdrop.

Kash comes in again but his moonsault hits Scotty’s knees. Scotty dives for the tag and loses his shoe but gets over to Funaki to clean house. A high cross body gets two on Noble but the one shoed Scotty takes Kash down for the Worm. Funaki dropkicks him to the floor but gets caught in a gorilla press gutbuster from Noble for the pin.

Rating: C. Another nice match here with both teams getting to show off a little bit. There’s only so much you can get out of a match between the Pitbulls and Hotty/Funaki but it was a very pleasant surprise. The Pitbulls weren’t a bad team but they were around in a boring stretch for the tag team division.

Speaking of the tag team division, here’s a Tag Team Title shot at Great American Bash 2006.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Pit Bulls

The Bulls are Jamie Noble and Kid Kash. They were a team that was around when I really wasn’t watching Smackdown so this is a new thing for me. London and Kash start us off with Kash taking it to the mat. For some reason we’re talking about the Rock N Roll Express now. Kash keeps running him over so London speeds things up to take over. Off to Kendrick and they use a modified rocket launcher for two.

Kendrick works on the arm and we hear about the Crockett family starting up the Bash in the 80s. Off to Noble who apparently likes having men on the ground. I love wrestling but the gay jokes are really hard to avoid at times. Back to London who keeps Noble’s arm in trouble. This has been one sided so far and Londrick sends them to the floor. You know that means stereo dives.

FINALLY Noble gets in a shot to take over and gets a pair of two counts. Back to Kash who slams Kendrick into the mat by his hair. Kendrick dodges a charge and brings in London. Things speed way up and we talk about Ivan Putski. They go to the apron and London tries to skin the cat, but Noble gets in a shot to the back. I guess this is the official face in peril part.

London may have hurt his back on the way down onto the apron. Noble hooks on a chinlock for a few seconds and there’s a leg lariat for two. The Pit Bulls do some good old fashioned heel tag team work to keep Kendrick out. More double teaming follows but London fights out of the corner. He kicks Noble into Kash but Kash makes the save to break up the tag. Cole says London was minutes away from making the tag. Well at least he was close.

London backflips out of a suplex and falls into Kendrick for the tag. Springboard missile dropkick takes out Kash and things speed WAY up. He hits leg lariats to everyone but Noble makes the save on the cover. Noble tries something like a double underhook piledriver on Kendrick but London saves again. There’s a huge dive to the floor by Kendrick to take out Noble. Kash can’t get the brainbuster to London so Kendrick dives off the top with a sunset flip for the pin.

Rating: B-. This match right here has already had more energy in it than the entirety of the previous two shows in this series. Londrick would spend the next 9 months or so as champions which is still the longest tag title reign in the WWE/F in about fifteen years. Very fun tag match with all kinds of old school heel tag work to make things very fun and get the crowd into it.

We’ll jump ahead to Great American Bash 2007.

Cruiserweight Title: Jimmy Wang Yang vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Shannon Moore vs. Jamie Noble vs. Funaki

It’s a five man match but remember that this is a Cruiserweight Open, as in anyone can get in on this. Chavo is champion coming in. This is the dying days of the title as this was thrown on the card yesterday with no story. They did these kind of matches for probably a year. Hornswoggle is on the floor and hides under the ring. Chavo tries to run but gets thrown outside instead. This is one fall to a finish.

This is one of those matches where you can’t really keep up with anything so the whole thing is pretty all over the place. Chavo comes back in and Cole talks about his Latina wife. Shannon gets two on Chavo but Funaki hits a cross body onto both of them for a combined two. Powerslam gets two for Noble but Chavo breaks it up again. Chavo hooks some freaky rollup on Yang and transitions into a half crab but it gets broken up by Funaki.

Moore slams Funaki into the buckle HARD. Noble vs. Moore now. Make that Noble vs. Funaki. See what I mean about how there’s no point in trying to call this? Funaki gets an enziguri for two on Moore. Gory Bomb to Funaki gets two for the champ. Almost everyone goes to the floor so Yang sets for a dive. Chavo stops it and it’s Tower of Doom time. Noble is down and here’s Horny to come off the top with a Tadpole Splash to win the title.

Rating: C-. Like I said there’s only so much you can do in these. The ending is totally legal when you think about it: he’s certainly small enough and it was an Open so anyone can enter at any time right? This wasn’t anything great but it was very clear that the title was done. And no it wasn’t Horny that killed it. The belt was long since dead.

Off to Smackdown on October 19, 2007.

Jamie Noble vs. Undertaker

Undertaker actually comes out first. Jamie dodges in the corner and hammers away with about as much luck as you would imagine. There’s the chokeslam and the Tombstone is good for the pin.

We’ll jump ahead nearly a year to one of Noble’s last wins, on Raw from September 1, 2008.

Jamie Noble vs. William Regal

Noble wants to date Layla so she’s here too. I don’t remember that pairing very well at all but this brings it back a bit. Granted it’s not exactly the biggest angle of all time. Regal annoyed Layla when she was dancing and Noble saved her so there’s your background. Regal is in his one piece swimsuit attire and he pounds Noble down with ease. A full nelson is easily countered and they trade some rollups for two. Regal punches him in the face to put him down as the beating continues. Out of nowhere, Noble grabs a small package for the quick pin. This was like a minute long.

We’ll wrap it up on ECW on Sci-Fi on February 3, 2009.

Jamie Noble vs. Boogeyman

Noble runs from the bag of worms to start. Boogeyman throws him into the corner but Jamie hammers away with some right hands. A beal sends Jamie out to the floor and a gorilla press sends him back into the ring. Jamie stomps away back inside and a top rope forearm gets two. We hit the chinlock on Boogey but he throws Jamie into the corner to escape. Back up and the pumphandle slam is enough to pin Noble.

Rating: D+. This was a bit better than I was expecting as Boogeyman was getting better around this time. Noble was at his best when he was making someone look better and that’s exactly what he did here. He could bounce around well enough and Boogeyman was strong enough to do all the throws and slams. Not terrible.

Jamie Noble is a guy that was very efficient with what he did and it’s easy to see why he’s an agent today. His stuff in late WCW was really solid stuff with everyone flying around the ring and going insane. Noble wasn’t as good in WWE but he was able to do enough to make the people around him look good.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – September 17: Spike Dudley

Today we have a giant killer: Spike Dudley.

Spike got his start in 1993 and made it to ECW in late 1996. We’ll pick things up at Cyberslam 1997.

Axl Rotten vs. Spike Dudley

Spike takes some laps around the ring so Rotten sneaks to the floor and drills him to start. Basically Spike’s gimmick was that he was a stoner that would get beaten up for about 99% of the match and occasionally hit an Acid Drop (running Diamond Cutter up the corner) for the shocking pin, usually against a giant. Into the ring for more beatings until Spike hits a few basic moves to get some offense in along with some dives. He blocks a bulldog and gets one of his own as Bubba and D-Von come out. Their distraction lets Axl hit a Dominator to end it. Hey look: it’s another boring match.

Rating: F+. Dude, give me SOMETHING of note. The opener was decent at best and since then it’s been pointless singles matches that aren’t any good. Spike was pretty worthless until he got a cult following (as in a portion of the cult following ECW had) who made him as famous as he got. This wasn’t interesting at all as Spike more or less got squashed here but by a guy I have zero interest in watching.

Off to Born to Be Wired for a match that made Spike’s career.

Spike Dudley vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

This is before the Giant Killer phase for Spike. Spike beats up a chair before the match due to reasons of drugs. We’re eight days from Hardcore Heaven and we’re told that we’ll learn Bigelow’s opponent later in the hour. Bigelow asks the fans what section he should throw Spike into. Spike grabs a leg which gets him nowhere at all. Well scratch that as it gets him launched halfway across the ring and through the air.

Bigelow picks Spike up again and teases the fans about throwing him into the crowd but just drops him down instead. A BIG suplex puts Spike down and Dudley sells like only he can. The guy can’t do much because of his size but he’s great at looking like a rag doll. Spike gets posted and he’s busted open. Bigelow splashes him in the corner but the moonsault misses. Spike fires away with a bunch of forearms which finally drop Bigelow for two. The Acid Drop is blocked as Bigelow launches Spike to the mat. Spike hits Bigelow low and hooks a victory roll for the shocking upset.

Rating: D+. This is Heyman 101: when a guy is a huge underdog, he’ll get slaughtered for almost all of the match and then hit one move out of nowhere for the pin. Watch ECW and see how many times you get that exact ending. Spike would wind up as a kind of a cult favorite (inside the cult that was ECW) and he would be the opponent at Hardcore Heaven, where Bigelow MASSACRED him.

To Hardcore Heaven 1997 for said massacre.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Spike Dudley

Spike is 5’7 and 155lbs but recently defeated the 6’3, 360lb Bigelow, setting up this showdown. Dudley’s full name is Little Spike Dudley and he wears tye dye and talks about seeing colors. His finishing move is called the Acid Drop if the idea isn’t clear enough. Bigelow is a huge bald man who has been a monster for over ten years now. He’s also Brian Lee’s replacement in the Triple Threat, joining Candido and Douglas.

Spike hammers away to start but is LAUNCHED across the ring with ease. A running splash crushes Spike and Bigelow does a little dance. Dudley comes back with a bulldog out of the corner but his hurricanrana is countered into the biggest powerbomb I’ve seen in years. Bigelow picks him up and slams Spike onto the turnbuckle, busting him open badly. Back in, Bigelow gorilla presses him up and throwing him from the ring into about the third row. He would do that again in the ECW Arena in a clip that was on ECW highlight reels for years. Back in and Bigelow hits an over the shoulder piledriver followed by the moonsault for the pin.

Rating: D. This was literally a squash but entertaining despite its low quality. Spike would regularly beat giants in ECW, only to get crushed like this later on. Bigelow was capable of looking great while destroying people and making the fans hate him, giving us a very good pairing between these two. Nothing match but the bumps looked awesome.

Spike would spend a lot of time fighting his brothers, such as here at Heat Wave 1998.

Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Tommy Dreamer/Sandman

The match is billed as a street fight, which usually applies to most ECW matches. The Dudleys take their sweet time getting to the ring. They now have Jeff Jones in their camp as well. This is Bubba Ray/D-Von/Big Dick if that wasn’t clear. Bubba challenges anyone in the WWF or WCW to a fight before moving on to challenge fans. Joel gets the mic and describes himself as hotter than a heat wave and harder than Chinese algebra.

Jones is announced as a referee with hair and is carrying a doll made to look up like Beaulah. Sign Guy has a knee injury but is introduced as the Innovator of Silence (as opposed to Dreamer being the Innovator of Violence). The Dudleys are the Intergalactic Six Man Champions. The entrances are funny but take nearly fifteen minutes. Their opponents all come out carrying ladders which are set up on the ramp. Sandman’s entrance is shorter at only about four minutes.

There will be tags, at least to start, with D-Von trading slaps with Dreamer. A few pinfalls attempts get two each but the fans get distracted by something in the crowd. Bubba comes in and the fans want Spike, who gets the tag and is promptly thrown all over the place. He’s able to get out of a gorilla press and nails Bubba with some forearms followed by right hands in the corner. Bubba responds with a running layout powerbomb to crush Spike.

A hard lariat drops Spike so Dreamer tries to start a Spike chant. Bubba misses a splash and Spike counters a powerbomb with a hurricanrana. The tag brings in Big Dick and he gets to face Sandman so the brawl can get started. They quickly get to the floor and everything breaks down. All six pair off and they fight into the crowd with Spike hammering away on D-Von and Dreamer sending Big Dick into the barricade.

Bubba crotches Dreamer on the barricade as Sandman brings a ladder into the ring. A bloody Spike climbs the ladder and dives on all three Dudleys. D-Von is thrown back inside and crushed under a swanton from Sandman. Bubba’s middle rope backsplash onto the ladder onto Dreamer has Tommy rolling around in agony. Spike comes back with an Acid Drop for two as the fans don’t seem to care all that much. Everyone but Dreamer is bleeding now.

The Dudleys all get tied into Trees of Woe and Dreamer puts Sign Guy’s bad leg in a Figure Four. Jeff Jones makes the save and piledrives the doll, earning him a piledriver from Dreamer. Gertner gets tied in a Tree of Woe as well and all four get chairs put in front of the face. Referee John Finnegan helps the good guys as they all hit dropkicks to drive the chairs into a Dudley’s face. Big Dick is up and chokebombs Dreamer before throwing Spike over the top and through a table. Sandman takes Big Dick down but Bubba lays him out. Bubba misses a splash to Dreamer and gets DDTed on the ladder for the pin.

Rating: D. This was the usual ECW brawl but the wrestling at the beginning brought it down. The problem with guys like Sandman and Big Dick is that they’re only good at brawling, making it almost painful to watch them try to do a technical sequence. The other issue is no one believes this isn’t going to break down into a brawl, so why waste time on the wrestling stuff, especially when it’s supposed to be a street fight?

And again at Guilty As Charged 1999.

Dudley Boys vs. New Jack/Spike Dudley

Spike is dressed like a gangsta to match New Jack. The weapons are brought in and the fight is quickly on with the Boys in early trouble. Jack bites D-Von and Spike hits Bubba low a few times. D-Von and New Jack head to the floor as Spike hurricanranas Bubba out of the corner for two. Bubba comes back with a LOUD cookie sheet shot to Spike’s face. D-Von unloads on New Jack with right hands as Bubba channels Bam Bam Bigelow by throwing Spike over the top and into the crowd.

Bubba goes back to pick Spike up and throws him over the barricade for another big crash. Jack sends D-Von into the barricade before hitting him in the head with the ring bell. Spike is somehow still alive and ripping at Bubba’s eyes. Jack and Spike get in the ring and both guys get guitars. The Dudleys have chairs but quickly bail. Big Dick goes down after two guitar shots but the Dudleys come back with the chairs to take over. Jack is thrown to the apron and Bubba hits a middle rope sitout powerbomb to break Spike in half.

Instead of covering, Bubba goes after Jack on the ramp and gets hit in the face with a cookie sheet. D-Von takes it away and nails Bubba by mistake, but is still able to hit a mostly botched 3D (Bubba’s arms were around Jack’s chest instead of his head). Back in the ring Spike hits an Acid Drop on Big Dick and one on both Dudleys. He tries a second on Big Dick but gets thrown off, setting up a much better 3D for the pin.

Rating: C-. Again, they kept this short and the match worked far better as a result. It also didn’t turn into the brawl around the arena which really takes away from what they’re doing most of the time. It’s still not good, but keeping these things somewhat under control helps them out a lot.

For the Tag Team Titles at Hardcore Heaven 1999.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Balls Mahoney/???

Mahoney fights them off on his own to start and actually takes Bubba down, only to slip on a top rope elbow attempt and hit Bubba’s leg instead of his chest. D-Von is back in now but walks into a belly to belly suplex. Mahoney gets slammed off the top as Spike Dudley’s music starts, bringing the match to a standstill. They’re waiting at the ramp but Spike comes through the crowd with a double low blow (which clearly didn’t make contact with D-Von).

Balls throws Spike onto Gertner and Sign Guy but the Dudleys jump Mahoney from behind. Balls then throws Spike at the Dudleys but they catch him in mid air and throw him out to the floor. D-Von hits a flying headbutt to Balls’ head and they fall outside. Spike limps back into the ring but walks into a big Samoan drop from Bubba. A table is set up and Spike gets kicked in the face. He comes back with a low blow but Bubba counters his hurricanrana with a huge sitout powerbomb through the table.

Balls breaks up the cover but gets caught by a reverse DDT from D-Von. 3D looks to finish Spike but Balls cleans house with the chair. Gertner nails Balls with a chair to no effect. He tries to light a fireball but winds up just throwing the matches in a funny bit. Joel dances in the corner as Balls pulls out a bottle of lighter fluid and sprays it with his mouth. He picks up a match and blows fire at Gertner, only to walk into 3D for the pin.

Rating: D. Where do I even start? First of all, this is the third straight pay per view where the Dudleys have issued an open challenge and Spike has answered with a different partner. Second, we’re twenty minutes into this show and two title matches are already done. This is what I was getting at when I said ECW could go nuts at any given moment. Third, the match wasn’t even any good as it was basically Bubba vs. Spike with D-Von and Balls running interference.

Then again, with Balls Mahoney against the Dudleys for the Tag Team Titles. Some of you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. From Heat Wave 1999.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Balls Mahoney

Balls and Spike are challenging and Mahoney makes this a street fight where falls count anywhere in the building. Spike is quickly thrown onto the ramp and D-Von goes after him, leaving Balls to hammer on Bubba in the ring. A HARD chair shots drops Mahoney but Spike avoids a similar shot. Spike grabs a bulldog to send Bubba onto the ramp as D-Von sends Mahoney into the barricade. Spike runs down the ramp but gets backdropped into the ring.

The partners switch off again and D-Von hits Spike in the head with the bell. Mahoney hits Bubba in the head with a beer as a bloody Spike hurricanranas D-Von out to the floor. Bubba nails Spike in the head with a sign that says Dudley Street before carving up Mahoney’s head with a cheese grater. Now Balls is bleeding and Joey sounds like he’s going to be sick. Mahoney comes back with a superkick and nails Bubba in the head with the cheese grater.

Spike and D-Von are brawling in the crowd with both guys now bleeding. The cameras can’t keep up with them but they do see Bubba and Mahoney fighting in the crowd. They head up to a tunnel that leads to the concourse but Spike dives off a balcony to take them both down. Balls pulls D-Von back towards the ring and hits him in the head with a soda.

D-Von stomps away back inside but gets superkicked in the face. Bubba and Spike are back in as well with Bubba going up, only to get hit low. The challengers hammer away in opposite corners until the Dudleys take them down with stereo sitout powerbombs. Bubba and D-Von hammer away while ripping at the cuts on their opponents’ heads.

Balls and Spike duck right hands and nail neckbreakers at the same time for two each. An Acid Drop gets two on D-Von before a low blow and another Acid Drop gets two on Bubba. Sign Guy has to make the save so Balls rips Gertner’s mask off (revealing that he looks fine). The Dudleys hammer away, but a double rollup is good for the pin to give us new champion.

Rating: D-. This stuff is getting old in a hurry. As mentioned, this is the fourth show in a row where Spike has fought the Dudley Boys and the second in a row where he was teaming with Balls Mahoney. As for the match itself, you could barely follow anything because it was another wild brawl with everyone bleeding and a bunch of weapons. The teams doing the same moves at the same time makes the match look really scripted and hurts whatever good they have going on. Horrible match here which again wouldn’t mean anything as the teams would trade the titles twice more each, with no reign lasting over a month.

Somehow this got Spike a World Title program with Mike Awesome, starting at Guilty As Charged 2000.

ECW World Title: Spike Dudley vs. Mike Awesome

Awesome is defending. Spike puts out tables before Mike comes to the ring, including two in a stack. He jumps Awesome as the champion gets into the ring but Awesome throws him through a table less than twenty seconds in. Back in and Awesome throws Spike through the stack of two tables and Dudley is barely moving. Awesome gets two off a slingshot splash back inside and the champion isn’t happy.

Spike fights out of an Awesome Bomb and sends Mike to the floor, followed by a running shoulder off the apron. An Acid Drop over the barricade has Mike in trouble and Spike nails him with a few chair shots. Back in and Spike catches his foot on a suicide dive attempt, so the fans are of course merciless. Spike still counters an Awesome Splash with a top rope hurricanrana and hits a quick double stomp out of the corner. A spear puts both guys through the ropes but Mike kicks a chair into Spike’s face.

Awesome moves the barricade forward and throws Dudley into the crowd. He nails Spike with a not great looking chair shot but makes up with it off a huge springboard dive into the crowd. Awesome slips on the landing though and is holding his elbow. It doesn’t seem to be bad though as he and Jones set up another table, only to have Spike nail an Acid Drop through the table on the floor.

Spike is busted open but nails Awesome with a top rope chair shot. Back in and Awesome counters another Acid Drop by tossing Spike over the top and through a table. Mike brings in another table, blocks another Acid Drop and hits the same clothesline he used on Spike’s girlfriend. A super Awesome Bomb through the table retains the title.

Rating: D. Stick this about four slots earlier on the card and cut off about ten minutes from the match and it’s way better. There’s no real reason to have this as the main event, especially with some of the other stuff they had on this card. Awesome got to dominate, but there was never any doubt as to who was going to win here.

And a rematch from ECW on TNN on January 28, 2000.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Little Spike Dudley

Spike jumps Awesome to start and is immediately slammed down to the floor. Spike fires back but gets whipped into the barricade to keep the champion in control. After a quick brawl in the crowd we head back inside for Awesome to charge into a boot to the face. The champion hits a release German suplex for two and a lifting powerbomb for the same. A table is set up on the floor but Spike manages to bulldog Awesome through it instead.

Spike hits a top rope chair shot to Awesome but the champion is down on the floor. The Acid Drop is countered so Spike hits Awesome in the head with a chair instead. The fourth chair shot to the head in a row gets two but Awesome gets his foot up in the corner to block a charge. A BIG Awesome Bomb puts Spike down but the Awesome Splash gets two. Another table is set up in the corner and a running Awesome Bomb through said table retains the title.

Rating: D+. There was some drama here with the near falls but man alive could you have Spike do ONE SINGLE WRESTLING MOVE? I know he can do them because I’ve seen them use them before, but instead it was nothing but chair shots here. That’s a major reason I don’t like ECW: they thought swinging a chair in a wrestling ring meant wrestling.

Spike would miss most of 2000 with a bad leg but would come back for a TV Title shot at Massacre on 34th Street.

TV Title: Rhino vs. Spike Dudley

Rhino is defending and Spike is out for revenge for Rhino breaking Spike’s leg. The fight is on fast but Rhino breaks up an Acid Drop thirty seconds in. Spike Gores Rhino and goes after the big man’s leg but they quickly head to the floor. Rhino sends him into the barricade a few times but Spike gets a boot up to stop a charge. The challenger throws a chair in but Rhino pulls him off the apron to send him face first into a table. A chair to the head busts Spike open and they head back inside where the beating continues.

Rhino sends him face first into an open chair but stops to jaw with the fans, allowing Spike to throw a chair at the champion’s face. Another chair shot to Rhino’s head puts both guys on the floor and they head into the crowd. Spike quickly climbs a balcony and hits a dive to take Rhino down. A chair to the back of Rhino’s head has him in big trouble and they head back inside.

Rhino avoids a charge to send Spike face first into a buckle before countering the Acid Drop by sending Spike over the top and out through a table. Back in and Rhino nails the Gore but Spike bails to the floor. He’s quickly up though and nails Rhino in the knee with a chair. Spike tapes the leg to the ropes but Rhino breaks free and chokes Spike out for the win.

Rating: C-. They did what they could here but Spike’s quests for revenge rarely go very well. The size difference is too much to overcome and it would be too much to have Spike actually beat Rhino. He was able to do damage though and that’s about as far as they could go. Not a great match or anything but it could only be so good.

Off to the WWF now, starting on Raw, April 9, 2001.

Dudley Boys vs. X-Factor

Six man tag here. They start brawling in the aisle until we start with Justin vs. Bubba in the ring. Off to Spike as the Dudleys control early. Heel miscommunication puts Albert down but Spike dives on him which of course fails. Paul: “Not over here! We’re not Spanish!” Pac vs. Spike now. Spike gets beaten down a bit more until it’s hot tag to D-Von. This doesn’t last long as the bigger Dudleys put Albert on the floor and a 3D ends Credible. More or less a nothing match.

Spike would get a Tag Team Title shot at King of the Ring 2001.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike and ???

So we needed the interview to bridge the gap of 45 seconds? Well alright then. The Dudleys just won the titles three days before this by beating Benoit and Jericho thanks to Austin hitting Benoit with the title belt. And the mystery partner is Kane of all people. He’s IC Champion here and the pop is great. I’m loving this crowd. No Molly though which is a shame as she was freaking beautiful around this time.

In a cool spot, Kane and Bubba throw Spike back and forth like a ball until Bubba finally goes to the ground. This was one of the few periods when Spike was bearable. He’s still annoying, but not as much as. He’s like X-Pac. When he was against guys that were average size like D-Von he could put on a passable match, but with guys like Bubba who are bigger, there’s just no validating him having a chance at all.

The fans, to the shock of no one, want tables. That’s something that’s simply never going to die. Heyman goes into one of his legendary anti-women rants that never get old. He’ll never top the Medusa one though. Spike is of course getting the tar beaten out of him. At least some things never change. He goes for a rana and gets the living tar powerbombed out of him. He takes that move better than anyone I can ever remember.

D-Von is so far ahead of Bubba that it’s scary. He’s actually a decent worker and has had better characters over the years. He got rid of all the stupid Dudleys in ECW if nothing else. Kane comes in and hits a sweet sounding punch to D-Von. Bubba actually jumps into a sidewalk slam which looks really bad as Kane can’t get him all the way up.

He makes it up with a nice powerslam but they botch the living tar out of it as D-Von misses his cue to make the save so Long has to just stop his count at a long two while Bubba isn’t moving at all. The fans boo the heck out of it as no one is fooled at all. Spike gets thrown over the ropes in a reenactment of the Bigelow throw. With both Dudleys on the floor, Kane gets on the top on the opposite side of the ring.

He’s never been that smart. Acid Drop hits Bubba but this time D-Von gets the timing right. I types this time D-Von at the exact same time that Ross said it. Kane takes What’s Up, which according to past storylines meant nothing. Spike takes a 3D (for no apparent reason called a DDT by Ross. Heyman corrects him and Ross wakes up) for the pin. They set up a table but Kane stops them, hitting a diving powerbomb of all things on D-Von and Bubba goes through it. Well that was kind of pointless.

Rating: D+. Eh this was about as safe of a match as you could have asked for. That botch on the count was the worst I’ve ever seen though and it’s why this isn’t a C or so. I mean it completely made things look fake. No one expected new champions here and that’s fine and I’m glad they didn’t make the stupid switch. The match was ok at best but it filled in ten minutes, so that’s all well and good I suppose.

Spike got a Hardcore Title shot on Raw, December 10, 2001.

Hardcore Title: Spike Dudley vs. Undertaker

Taker won the title last night and Spike sits on his bike on the way to the ring. Pain ensues. Taker puts him in the Tree of Woe but Spike gets in a low blow and some weapon shots but they get shrugged off. A HUGE Last Ride onto a trashcan ends this quick. Taker is still insanely over because he’s still the same character he was before his heel turn.

And another Tag Title shot on Raw, January 7, 2002.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz

This is hardcore for no apparent reason and Stacy is with the Dudleys. It’s a brawl to start with Spike being sent into the steps. Bubba sprays him with a fire extinguisher as the fans want tables. Spike tries a sunset flip on Bubba, only to get blasted with the extinguisher again. A HARD trashcan lid to the face puts Tazz down and What’s Up Tazz? Bubba wants tables but whispers it because he’s evil right now.

Tazz is almost put through but Spike makes the save with a stop sign. There’s a Tazmission to D-Von but Tazz has to let it go to move a table. Stacy flashes Tazz to distract him but Bubba gets the view instead, allowing for a suplex onto a table. Spike puts him through the table with a Dudley Dog for the upset and the titles.

Rating: D+. The match was fast paced but not all that great. The problem here was that at the end of the day, does anyone buy Spike and Tazz as a long term championship team? It was clear that they were transitional champions, which is ok, but it doesn’t do much overall. The live crowd loved this though and there was a match before this to set it up, so it was far better than some other angles I’ve seen that tried to do the same thing.

Here’s a defense at No Way Out 2002.

Tag Titles: Booker T/Test vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz

The big guys are the challengers here. There are only one set of belts at this point so for some reason they decided that these two are the best choice for the titles. That’s just bizarre but whatever. Their combined weight is 398lbs. That’s just amusing. Test and Tazz fight as do the others. Test and Booker were champions back in the Alliance days I believe. Spike comes in with a missile dropkick off the top to take care of Test.

We get kind of a Hart Attack from the challengers but with a side kick instead. Tazz of course stands there and watches it happen instead of making a save or even attempting a save. Why save your tiny partner I guess? Spike as usual takes a beating which is what he is made for it seems. Axe Kick kills him pretty much and we get a spinarooni.

VERY weak hot tag to Taz who puts Booker on the floor. Test goes for a cover but yells at the referee when it’s two and walks into the Tazmission for the tap out. For the life of me I don’t get the point in putting the titles on these guys and then keeping them with these two for so long. A more traditional team would win them soon afterwards with Billy and Chuck.

Rating: D+. Pretty weak Raw level match here that didn’t have much at all going for it. Again Taz and Spike were nice for awhile but in matches like this it was just stupid. I mean really, beating Booker and Test clean? Would anyone buy that at all? I certainly didn’t and thankfully they would lose the belts soon after this.

Spike and Taz would lose the titles a few days later so we’ll jump ahead to Raw on April 8, 2002.

European Title: Spike Dudley vs. William Regal

Regal is defending, Spike steals the brass knuckles and knocks him out and we have a new champion in 5 seconds.

Time to reform the Dudleys! At Survivor Series 2002.

Dudley Boys/Jeff Hardy vs. 3 Minute Warning/Rico

This is an elimination tables match. Oh and that’s Bubba and Spike, not D-Von. Spike and Bubba got put through the same table on Raw Monday to set this up. The Dudleys and Jeff clear the ring to start and Spike is thrown into the arms of the Samoans. It’s Bubba vs. Rico in the ring at the moment, because putting Spike and Jeff against Umaga and Rosey is a great idea right? Bubba chops Rico HARD in the corner before things settle down.

What’s Up hits Jamal and we get to the tagging section of the match before everything breaks down again. Bubba tells Jeff to get the tables but Rosey runs over Bubba after Bubba sets up a table in the corner. A BIG backdrop puts Jeff on the floor and Rosey rams Spike’s head into a table. Rosey misses a charge and drives himself through a table in the corner but that doesn’t count because it wasn’t someone else putting him through.

Jeff tries a top rope dive at Rosey but literally bounces off. Rico brings in another table and gets caught in a Dudley Dog, but 3 Minute Warning catches him in a double powerbomb to put Spike through the table instead. Jeff and Bubba get slammed down but Bubba knocks Rosey off the top and Jeff sends Rico flying into a cameraman. Bubba pounds away but Rico hits a spinwheel kick to take his head off. Rico could go in the ring make no mistake.

Rosey and Jeff go out into the crowd and there’s a table out there with them. Jeff is put on said table as Bubba gets kicked in the face by Rico. Jamal misses a splash and crushes Rico, allowing Bubba to Bubba Bomb Jamal and go to save Jeff. With Bubba’s help, Jeff goes up to the top of an entrance and hits a BIG Swanton through Rosey through the table to make it 2-2.

Back in the ring Jamal has Bubba on a table ready for a Rico moonsault, but he looks hesitant to launch. He looks over his shoulder, shouts “C’MON JEFF!” before staggering. THEN Jeff shakes the ropes and Rico crotches himself. Not the best response but that’s on Jeff more than Rico. Bubba tries a belly to back superplex through the table but Jamal moves it away. Jeff hits Whisper in the Wind to Jamal and follows it with a dropkick.

Hardy goes to the floor to get another table which he throws at Jamal. Jeff tries to run the railing but Jamal throws the table at Jeff, who goes flying through it. That doesn’t count which I can kind of agree with. Jamal puts Jeff on another table and hits a HUGE splash off the top to eliminate Jeff. That looks awesome. Bubba beats on Rico in the ring but Jamal saves his sideburned buddy. Jamal goes up to try a top rope rana (I guess) on Bubba, only to get caught in a HUGE powerbomb through the table to get us down to one on one.

It’s Rico vs. Bubba with the former pounding away and pulling in another table. Rosey comes back in but Bubba pounds away on him too. Now Jamal is in there too and it’s D-VON to the rescue! He’s on Smackdown at this point so this is a big deal. 3D puts Rico through the table to end this.

Rating: B-. That’s likely high but this was what you want to open a show. It helps a lot that this was a fifteen minute match instead of like six minutes like they are on Raw. This was fun and the pop for the reunion of the Dudleys (which would be permanent) was a feel good moment. Good stuff here and a good choice to open things up, especially in New York City.

Spike would get the European Title back and defend it at Insurrextion 2003.

Rodney Mack/Christopher Nowitski/Teddy Long vs. Dudley Boyz

Nowitski has a mask on because of a face injury. He was an imbecile in WWE but given the work he’s doing today you can overlook that I think. D-Von and Mack start us off and nothing of note is going on here. You really can tell here how little thought has been put into this. Why are these teams feuding again? Well of course we’re not going to be told.

Spike gets thrown over the top onto the heels as we’re just waiting on the Teddy beatdown. Bubba and Chris do the test of strength dancing spot which makes me shake my head violently. Spike comes in to waste a bit of our time. Nowitski is in the minority team because a Harvard education makes him a minority. Well that’s better than nothing I guess.

Mack was a pretty decent tough guy but nothing ever came of him. Teddy does the Bobby Heenan thing, beating on Spike and then running at the first sign of trouble. Five minutes have passed and not a thing of note has happened. Mack accidently clotheslines Teddy, D-Von takes down Mack, Spike pins Long. There you go and we’re done.

Rating: D-. This was on PPV in the third spot on a card. But hey, Vince says these individual brand shows are a good idea so they must be right? There’s no need to have Benoit or Angle or Lesnar on the card when we can have these matches right? Just get on to the next match on this tour of fun please.

Spike won a triple threat match to earn a Cruiserweight Title shot on Smackdown, July 29, 2004.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Spike Dudley

They shake hands to start in a little sportsmanship. Feeling out process to start with both guys running the ropes and diving into a standoff. Rey grabs a hammerlock and Spike fires off some hard elbows to escape, much to Rey’s annoyance. They head outside with Spike choking away. Back in and Rey gets two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker before cranking on both of Spike’s arms.

Spike fights back with a headbutt to the ribs and a hard clothesline for two. A headscissors sends Rey face first into the buckle but he’s able to crotch Spike to prevent what looked to be a double stomp. Dudley’s sunset bomb is countered and Rey nails a low dropkick to the face. Mysterio misses a Lionsault press and gets bulldogged for a very close two. Cue D-Von for a distraction, allowing Bubba to nail Rey from behind. A Dudley Dog off the ropes gives Spike the title.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but it led to Spike turning heel and bossing the Dudleys around in one of the most bizarre booking decisions that I can ever remember. Spike was fine as a Crusierweight Champion even though he never did much as champion. The match was fine with Spike getting more and more violent before finally using the Dudleys to help when his own efforts didn’t work.

Spike would defend at Survivor Series 2004.

Cruiserweight Title: Spike Dudley vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman

Spike is defending and is a heel here. This is one fall to a finish. Kidman hurt Chavo on a Shooting Star Press and seemed to be proud of it, which resulted in a heel turn for him. The other good thing here is that they don’t have to tag. That’s always a waste of time in these things as you just wait for things to break down. Kidman and Spike form a quick alliance, only to have Kidman dropkick the champ out to the floor.

Rey sends Kidman to the floor and it’s off to Rey vs. Chavo who are apparently friends at this point. Oh please, like these two could EVER get along. Rey spins Chavo around with a headscissors before Spike sends Rey into the corner and stomps away while screaming. Chavo comes back in and a double clothesline puts himself and Spike down. With Kidman on the apron, Rey hits a rana to send him out to the floor in a cool looking spot.

Back in and Rey tries the sitout bulldog on Chavo but Guerrero throws him onto Kidman in a seated senton. Chavo dives on both of them, leaving Spike standing ta….short actually. Anyway the champ dives on all of them but they step aside to let him crash. Chavo finally gets his hands on Billy back in the ring but Spike comes back in to break up a pinfall attempt.

Rey misses a moonsault over Spike’s head and gets thrown to the floor as a result. We get a Tower of Doom with everyone minus Rey involved, so Rey comes in and tries to steal a pin. Rey charges at Kidman but gets caught in a BK Bomb (Sky High) for two but Chavo breaks up the Shooting Star. Spike hits a running headbutt to Rey’s ribs but the Dudley Dog is broken up. 619 hits Spike but Billy breaks up the West Coast Pop. Chavo hits the Gory Bomb on Spike but Kidman hits a slingshot legdrop on Chavo. Rey takes out Kidman and Spike steals the pin on Chavo to retain.

Rating: B-. Not a great match or anything here but it was fine for an opener. Rey was insanely popular still but Spike keeping the title was a great way to tick off the fans. There’s nothing wrong with a heel winning, as long as the opener fires up the crowd, which this did. Good choice.

After losing the title, Spike would drop through the floor in WWE before leaving in 2005. He would show up in TNA for a brief run as Brother Runt, including this match at Bound For Glory 2006.

Samoa Joe vs. Brother Runt vs. Raven vs. Abyss

This is Monster’s Ball which basically means hardcore. Jake Roberts is guest referee. This is also the third match in a row that isn’t a simple one on one or tag match. Everyone jumps Joe to start and knock him to the floor. Raven and Runt team up on Abyss with Runt being knocked to the outside. Runt brings in a chair and Raven hits his drop toehold on Abyss into the chair but Joe comes back in to make people care. Joe hits the Facewash on Raven but walks into a chokeslam.

Abyss runs over the ECW guys and throws Runt into the crowd from the ring to emulate Bigelow’s famous spot. Raven clotheslines Abyss to the floor and dives on him, which Abyss shrugs off without even leaving his feet. Joe hits a BIG corkscrew dive onto all three to put them all down while landing on his feet. Raven pops up and hits Joe with a Silence of the Lambs style mask of his.

They go up the ramp and Joe is knocked through a table off the ramp. Runt and Abyss climb up part of the set and Runt is chokeslammed onto a platform which doesn’t have much give at all. Something happens which results in Abyss landing on Runt but the camera is zoomed in on Roberts. The replay shows that it was kind of an elbow drop. Nice production work there guys.

Raven throws Joe through another table in a vain attempt to make us believe he won’t win. Is there a point to Roberts being referee at all here? He hasn’t done anything. Abyss gets two on Runt but Raven saves. Abyss drops an Earthquake splash down for two on Raven. Joe comes in to break up Shock Treatment by pounding on Abyss. He misses the backsplash but kicks Abyss low instead.

Powerslam onto a chair gets two. Raven drop toeholds Joe to the floor but Abyss knocks him down and loads up the tacks. Jake pulls out his bag but Raven jumps him and loads up a DDT on Jake. Abyss pours out the tacks but Joe pulls down the ropes to prevent Raven from going into the tacks via the Black Hole Slam. Joe knocks Abyss to his knees and hits the senton backsplash to put Abyss’ face into the tacks. Raven breaks up the choke but Jake DDTs him so that the MuscleBuster can give Joe the pin.

Rating: D. I know this is a sweeping statement, but this might be the most questionable choice in TNA history. Why in the world was Joe in this match? Jake added NOTHING here. He counted slow and I guess he didn’t hurt anything, but what difference did it make to have a guest referee? The match was your usual garbage but no one bought anyone but Joe having a chance here. Also did Runt fall into the same hole the James Gang and AMW fell into in the previous match?

Spike would head back to the indies and into retirement before returning for One Night Only: Hardcore Justice II.

Team 3D vs. Brother Runt/???

Tables match of course. It’s surprising to see Bully as an Ace when that turn wasn’t until months after this was taped. D-Von corners So Cal Val in the corner but doesn’t shove his crotch in her face at least. Bully Ray cuts a long and dull promo before the match about the awesomeness of Tea 3D while insulting a bunch of fans. Ray takes some jabs at Holly for no apparent reason before talking about using Runt as a pawn during the wedding to Brooke. He makes the same jokes about Dreamer and Sandman while saying Runt has no partner. Runt comes out and has a partner: Jeff Hardy.

The Dudleys send Jeff to the floor before Bubba drives Runt’s glasses into his forehead. D-Von beats on Runt with basic power stuff but Runt blocks a suplex, only to be taken down by a clothesline. Off to Ray for a wishbone split before yelling at Earl Hebner in the corner. Ray blocks the Dudley Dog and breaks up a sunset flip attempt but D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt, allowing Runt to make the hot tag.

Jeff cleans house with a low dropkick on D-Von as things break down. Bully kicks Jeff down but the Dudleys can’t hit What’s Up. Instead it’s Runt hitting one on D-Von before calling for the tables. Jeff brings in a table but Team 3D takes over again. A double suplex to Runt misses the table and Jeff hits a Twisting Stunner on D-Von. Runt adds the Dog to put D-Von on the table but Ray makes the save. Jeff and Runt take over again and Hardy splashes D-Von through a table (barely) for the win. It’s as lame of a build as it sounds.

Rating: D. This was nothing to see again with and felt like a bad house show main event. I get the idea of Brother Runt having history with the Dudleys, but we’ve seen this match so many times that it’s almost impossible to care about anymore. Jeff getting the win to end the show is the right idea to send the fans home happy but man it was dull getting there.

Spike is a guy that had some severe physical limitations but managed to turn it into a very nice little career. The giant killer stuff was the logical character for him but he was only able to do so much. The stuff when he stopped being all insane was the best time of his career and he and Molly were about as cute of a couple as there has ever been. The guy wasn’t great but given his size he was pretty solid.

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Wrestler of the Day – September 16: Pedro Morales

Today we’ll look at the first ever WWF Triple Crown winner: Pedro Morales.

Morales got his start in 1959 but as you can guess, it’s borderline impossible to find stuff from way back then. Instead we’ll jump ahead to December 16, 1970.

Gorilla Monsoon/Pedro Morales vs. The Mongols

The Mongols are way old school and named Bepo and Geto. Monsoon is HUGE. He’s the Asian Champion and Pedro is US Champion (the WWF version which was gone by the 70s). This is 2/3 falls and we’re joined in progress. It’s in Philly and from sometime in the late 60s. The Mongols are bald other than ponytails. This is the WWWF also. Monsoon is sent to the floor by the International Tag Team Champions.

Geto, the smaller one, drops a bunch of knees off the top on Gorilla to win the first fall. Clipped to the second fall and Pedro is in trouble. One of those Mongols looks a lot like Nikolai Volkoff. And I’m right as he’s Bepo. Bear hug by Gorilla but Bepo makes the save. This isn’t incredibly good. Pedro watches Monsoon getting his teeth kicked in. The Mongols get disqualified for double teaming so we go to the third fall.

Monsoon’s back is hurt so FINALLY we get Pedro. He throws some decent dropkicks which gets the pin on Geto. The film starts messing up and looks like it’s being played in fast motion. The third fall was either clipped or lasted 18 seconds. Pedro looked good if nothing else I guess.

Rating: N/A. Haven’t used one of those in awhile. This really isn’t fair to grade with all the clipping and lack of any story at all. It’s not too bad and Pedro looked great. Monsoon was a freaking load and the Mongols were nothing special. Then again it was the 60s so how angry can I really get with it?

Pedro would quickly become a bigger deal, earning a World Title shot in MSG on February 8, 1971.

Ivan Koloff vs. Pedro Morales

Obviously the commentary (performed by WWE Hall of Famer Jim Ross) was recorded later as this was on an official WWE DVD. Pedro is another of those ethnic heroes, this one of Puerto Rican descent. Koloff is absolutely loathed while Pedro is as over as free beer in a frat house. Pedro loads up his big left hand to start but Koloff backs away to the ropes. I believe there’s a clip there but it might have just been a camera angle switching. Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference.

Ivan doesn’t want to get into a fist fight with Pedro so he keeps locking up with him. They continue circling each other and we might have another clip to later circling. Pedro grabs a headlock and the fans lose their minds. Things speed up with Morales kicking Koloff off of him and taking the champion down with a headlock takeover. Koloff fights up after being held on the mat for a few moments. They stand up but Pedro keeps the hold on Ivan, causing the champion to grab Morales’ hair or trunks whenever he can.

Koloff finally escapes the hold and takes Pedro down with a kick to the ribs. The champion hooks on a chinlock and we’re clipped to later in the hold with the referee forcing a break due to thinking it was a choke. We’re clipped again to another chinlock by Koloff, this time with him using the strap from his singlet to choke Pedro. Morales fights up and hits some trademark left hands to the ribs. We’re clipped again to Ivan begging off in the corner and asking for a handshake.

Morales will have none of that but accepts a test of strength. The powerhouse Koloff takes him down but Pedro outsmarts him, hooking a monkey flip to send Koloff into the ropes. Another possible clip occurs and Pedro wants to throw fists. Instead he gets caught in a bearhug which is one of Koloff’s signature moves. After being in the hold well over a minute, Pedro comes out of it with a slam which only seems to make the champion angry.

Ivan pounds away on Morales with punches and forearms but they collide off a double shoulder block and both men are down. It’s the champion up first but he misses a running splash. Pedro still can’t follow up so Koloff slams him down and tries the top rope knee drop that won him the title. His challenger rolls away though and it’s Pedro going up top now, hitting a top rope cross body for two. Koloff whips Pedro into all four corners before trying what we would call a German suplex. All four shoulders are down but as the three count comes down, Pedro raises his right should, giving him the pin and the championship.

Rating: C+. This was a nice back and forth match with a huge ovation for the title change. The fans wanted to see someone take the title from Koloff and the fact that it was another of their heroes made it all the better. Pedro was already the United States Champion so he had a strong resume coming into the match. Again, the match wasn’t great by today’s standards but it did exactly what it was supposed to do.

We’ll move ahead to this title defense at some point in 1972.

WWWF World Title: Pedro Morales vs. Mr. Fuji

Fuji starts fast and throws the champion over the top and out to the floor. He rams Morales face first into the apron a few times before doing the same with the turnbuckle. Morales gets all fired up as is his custom and sends Fuji over the ropes. The evil Hawaiian is sent into the steps before they head back inside. Fuji slams Pedro down a few times but takes his sweet time going up top, only to get slammed down ala Flair. Pedro grabs a quick rollup for the pin.

Rating: D. To say Morales didn’t exactly have the most in depth psychology is an understatement. It was basically just random slams and chops before a rollup got the pin. Then again a four minute match was a rarity back then so I’d assume he’d be more comfortable with a lot more time.

Back to MSG on June 30, 1973.

WWWF World Title: Pedro Morales vs. George Steele

Pedro is all ticked off before he’s even in the ring. For some reason the champion is introduced twice. Steele charges at him but Pedro hammers away and sends him over the corner and out to the floor. Back in and Steele nails him in the ribs with a foreign object to take over. He stomps away and slams Pedro down but stands in the corner instead of following up.

Pedro gets back to his feet but is a bit calmer this time, opting for an armdrag instead of wildly swinging. Steele bails to the apron again but snaps Morales’ throat over the top rope. He rams the champ’s head into the buckle a few times, only to have Pedro do the same to him. Steele is busted open and Pedro bites at the cut until the referee finally stops it for the blood.

Rating: C. Better match here with the story making sense: Pedro did his usual brawling but got in over his head until he came back with using Steele’s own evil tricks against him to win. This was before Steele was an Animal and it’s really odd to see him as just a regular and even at times smart heel.

Pedro would lose the title in December of 1973 so we’ll head over to July 22, 1974.

Killer Kowalski vs. Pedro Morales

Talk about legends. Now Kowalski was the big time brawler of his day. He also trained HHH so there’s his biggest contribution to wrestling more than likely. This would be about 8 months after Pedro lost the world title, putting it in late July of 74. We’re in MSG here of course. Jesse Ventura is alone on commentary here. That’s a new one on me. Kowalski used the Claw on various body parts so he uses it on the leg here. Pedro’s leg problems seem to be a theme on this tape.

Clipped to more leg work. Jesse doing play by play is a very odd thing. He doesn’t shut up but keeps things fresh somehow. It’s more like a radio broadcast. The Claw is something that needs a good announcer to put it over because just from a visual perspective, it looks really stupid. Pedro comes back with some left hands and grabs Killer by the ears. Back to the knee and Pedro is in trouble again. How did this guy win the first triple crown?

They trade punches to the ribs and Morales takes over. Jesse is surprisingly good at play by play. Morales is left handed if that gives you a better mental picture of this. Morales grabs the Claw on the ribs. Clipped to a double stomp by Kowalski. This commentary has been recorded far later as Jesse talks about Kowalski like he’s retired, which he would have been. Kowalski bites the face and Pedro bites back. Killer takes him down but misses a double stomp. Off to the Claw on the stomach again and Pedro is in trouble. They brawl to the floor and it’s thrown out. WEAK.

Rating: D. I love old school stuff and I’ve always liked Pedro, but this was boring. The Claw is one of those moves that works as a quick finisher but having it in there all the time like this got really boring after awhile. At least it wasn’t very long. Kowalski is a guy that seems like he’d be better in quick spurts. This match felt like it would have been better for a live crowd, which is fine, but it does bring into question why it’s on a tape.

More MSG on February 17, 1975.

Pedro Morales vs. Butcher Vachon

They brawl in the corner to start and Vachon isn’t sure what to make of someone that can hang with him in a fight. Both guys send the other into the corner before Morales backdrops him down. Vachon cranks on the arm a bit and looks bored in doing so. Morales comes back with more left hands and the stalling continues. A big clothesline drops Morales and a shoulder to the ribs does it again. Vachon tries the same thing but gets caught in a sunset flip for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’m starting to get Pedro at this point and it’s an idea that works for the most part. It’s nothing great but the whole learning from your mistakes works well enough and shows some thinking in the ring. Vachon was better known as a brawler than as an in ring worker and that’s what we got here.

We’ll actually jump to the NWA for a bit here on Worldwide in 1979. I believe this is from Raleigh, North Carolina.

Paul Jones/Baron Von Raschke vs. Pedro Morales/Steve Regal

No not that Steve Regal. Steve and Jones get things going and they trade shoulders to no avail. Some armdrags take Jones down and it’s off to Pedro to crank on the arm. Off to an armbar but it’s off to the Baron who easily takes Regal down. The announcer is giving us one of the most in depth bios I’ve ever heard, including favorite sports, hobbies and astrological signs.

Baron, a Leo who enjoys raising rats for scientific studies, cranks on Regal’s arm, which once had a tryout for the Washington Redskins. Jones comes in to work on the arm as well before it’s back to the Baron for a shoulder breaker. Regal tries to get a rollup but gets beaten down and caught in Baron’s claw. Pedro tries to make a save but the hold stays on and Regal gets pinned.

Rating: C-. It’s very strange to see Pedro as just a guy instead of one of the top stars in the promotion. He wasn’t treated like anything special and this was basically a squash. The NWA was a totally different world from the NWA and this is a good example of why. Also, things were so much calmer here than in the WWF matches and it helped things a bit.

Back to the WWF with Pedro facing Baron Mikel Scicluna on TV in 1980.

Baron Mikel Scicluna vs. Pedro Morales

Baron hammers away to start but Pedro shoves him away and claps a lot. The Baron cranks on a top wristlock to no avail as Pedro shoves him down again. With the holds not working, Baron hammers away and takes Pedro into the corner. Morales takes him down to the mat for an armbar but Baron gets into the ropes. Now it’s Baron cranking on the arm and they hit the mat for some grappling. It’s Morales working on a leg lock before they get back up for some…brawling? Pedro grabs a backslide for the fast pin.

Rating: D+. This was a very different kind of match and the grappling was very odd to see from a brawler like Morales. Scicluna is a guy that I just do not get the appeal of as he’s never shown me anything. Naturally he’s in the Hall of Fame because if you wrestled in the 70s you’re an automatic candidate.

Pedro would appear at Showdown at Shea in 1980.

Tag Titles: Bob Backlund/Pedro Morales vs. Wild Samoans

Backlund is world champion and this is 2/3 falls. Basically this would be Cena/Orton vs. the tag champions if the tag titles were a big deal. Backlund is way over as is Morales. Vince says in the corner to his left are the champions. The corner is empty but who cares about little things like those? According to Foley it’s FAR more interesting to talk to Backlund than to Afa, which doesn’t surprise me at all.

As far as the relations here, Afa and Sika are brothers I believe. Afa’s kids include Samu and Manu while Sika’s son is Rosey and he has another son in FCW. More or less picture it like this: if they’re Samoan and a wrestler, they’re probably related to each other. Cole talks about Pedro being a former WWE Champion which makes me think of him holding the spinner belt. We get some discussion of the New York curfew which meant that no wrestling could happen after 11. Matches would just stop at that time due to state laws. Imagine a big match just stopping at that point.

This is being written hours after the final NXT show on Syfy and there was a This Week in WWE History segment about a Cactus Jack vs. HHH match. Oddly enough Foley and Cole discuss that very match here in a very funny story about Captain Lou wandering down to ringside while the two guys were brawling in the crowd. Apparently Vince and Cole were in the gorilla position (Cole’s words) and Vince looked at him and said “Did Captain Lou just walk to the ring?” “I believe he did.” “Just checking.” Far funnier than it sounds.

We get the famous Samoan nerve hold on Backlund as this has been far more interesting and far more modern of a style match. We get a good example of what a manager can do as he holds Backlund’s tights to keep him in the corner so Sika can beat on him. Foley gives us a rather interesting history of managers. He really knows what he’s talking about as this is the area and company he grew up with. Backlund gets the Atomic Drop (his finisher. It was a much simpler time obviously) and Morales gets an O’Connor Roll (run the other guy into the ropes and roll him backwards into a rollup. You’ve seen it a thousand times. Bret likes to do it.) for the first fall.

Vince flat out screws up and says we have new champions prompting a very interesting question from Foley: who yells at Vince when he screws up? Vince booked the match, Vince made the announcement and he’s told the referee made it 2/3 falls. HUGE BS chant starts us off. The Samoans beat up Morales before the second fall. THE FREAKING COPS TAKE ALBANO OUT! In the biggest city in the country in the middle of the summer, there was NOTHING better for them to do???

Foley starts having a sandwich because he saw Don Muraco do it as everything goes insane. Backlund gets a Piledriver on Sika to bring in both other guys. The commentary here is cracking me up. Backlund goes for a belly to back on Sika but Afa hits him in the head, prompting Backlund to…..fall backwards and drive Sika into the mat in a belly to back suplex. Pedro hits a dropkick on Sika so Backlund can pin him. They would have to forfeit the titles because Backlund couldn’t hold the tag and world titles so the Samoans got them back.

Rating: B. Most fun any of the matches so far tonight have been with the crowd being WAY into it and the guys having a great time out there. This worked as all four guys were pretty solid if not very good in the ring. The booking is a bit odd if they were just going to give the titles back to the Samoans. Why not a disqualification or something like that?

Pedro would become one of the first Intercontinental Champions. Here’s a defense in MSG on June 8, 1981.

Intercontinental Title: Sgt. Slaughter vs. Pedro Morales

They shove each other to start before it quickly turns into a slugout with Sarge taking him down to the mat. Pedro comes back with a hard left hand and sends Slaughter into the corner. Back up and Morales lays in more left hands but Slaughter pulls out a foreign object. Some American. He doesn’t even buy domestic. Slaughter loads it into his elbow pad and knocks Morales silly but doesn’t cover. Morales can barely get up so Slaughter goes up top, only to get slammed down as Pedro was goldbricking. The champ hammers away so Slaughter nails the referee for the DQ.

Rating: D+. These Morales brawls are kind of hard to sit through in a long stretch. This didn’t have much time due to the lame ending but I’m assuming it was to set up a rematch down the line. Slaughter was rapidly becoming a huge deal at this point though it was still a few years away.

Another defense in Philadelphia on February 22, 1982.

Intercontinental Title: Pedro Morales vs. Jimmy Snuka

Snuka has only been around for a few months at this point but the fans are loving him, despite him being a heel. The announcers aren’t sure what to do with him because they know he’s popular but he’s supposed to be the evil savage. He has a thing for flowers apparently. Snuka wrestles barefoot which is another thing that made him different. The fans here are split which is a weird sight.

They fight over a top wristlock to start and Snuka complains of a hair pull. Snuka takes it to the mat with arm control and Dick Worhle is the referee. He died a few days ago so that’s kind of sad to see. Now Snuka pulls the hair to keep the advantage. See how easy a heel move that is? Such little things like that one are just lost in modern wrestling.

Snuka runs him over and headbutts Pedro down as the fans applaud. Now keep in mind: Pedro is a very popular guy. He held the IC Title forever and was a former world champion. However, Snuka was a totally different kind of guy and the fans, especially the Philly crazy people, took notice and loved him. Pedro is in trouble and gets knocked to the floor by a forearm. All Snuka so far.

Out to the floor and Pedro goes into the apron. Back in and Pedro is almost knocked right back out. Off to a chinlock for a few moments and Pedro FINALLY gets up. He hits his first decent offense of the match in the form of a backdrop but Snuka takes him right back down again. A middle rope headbutt half kills Pedro and you would think that Snuka was the top guy in the company based on the fans’ reactions.

That only gets two though and Snuka has a headache from the headbutt. Pedro grabs the face and works it over (that’s not something I’m used to typing) and starts his comeback. He hits his big left and Jimmy looks like he’s dancing. Out to the floor and Snuka tastes the steel. A BIG left hand sends Snuka flying into the ropes. Snuka rakes the eyes which doesn’t really do much good. Pedro hits a knee to the chin and then shoves the referee because of that firey Latin temper of him. Now Pedro throws him to the floor and it’s a LAME DQ.

Rating: C+. Well it wasn’t a classic or anything as Pedro was way too fond of just throwing the left hand but the crowd was very energetic for this as they were both very popular guys. Notice that the match is very similar to the rest of them but the names are bigger. There wasn’t much variety in this era and it shows badly at times.

Another title defense on March 14, 1982.

Intercontinental Title: Pedro Morales vs. Adrian Adonis

Since Adrian never held this title, Pedro is defending. Joined in progress (again) as this is an Archives match. They slug it out and the fans are of course way into Pedro. He knocks Adonis to the floor and is slow even here in what I think is about 1980. They ram each other into various things and Pedro misses a shoulder back inside. That ring sounds very metallic. The American hits a German on the Puerto Rican and they do the suplex but one guy gets his shoulder up in time spot to keep the title on Pedro. Too short to rate but bad as always on this tape.

Against a fellow Hall of Famer in MSG on January 22, 1983.

Intercontinental Title: Pedro Morales vs. Don Muraco

This is from MSG in January of 83. Morales had taken the title from Muraco over a year ago. See, back then title reigns were VERY different. The title was introduced in 1979 and Ricky Steamboat was the 11th reign in 1987. In 8 years, the title changed hands 10 times. Think about that. Of the first ten reigns, the shortest was five months. Today, that would be a long reign. Back then it was by far the shortest. Three of the first ten lasted over a year. Think about that for a minute and now compare it to today.

As for this match, Muraco jumps the champ in the corner but Morales fights back quickly. Morales rips half of the shirt off Muraco and the challenger is in trouble. Corner sunset flip gets two for Morales. Muraco has a sleeve of his shirt still hanging off his arm. Pedro knocks him to the floor and this is all Morales so far. Muraco does a Flair Flop off the apron to the floor.

Pedro goes up top but doesn’t dive onto him as Don hides under the floor. That was pretty smart. Muraco tries to hide as Morales stalks him. Boot to the back of the head and it’s all Pedro. Gorilla criticizes him for not going for the kill, which is pretty good analysis. And there’s a low blow by Muraco and both guys are down. Still using the t-shirt, Muraco chokes Pedro with it in the corner, only to get low blowed as well.

Ok NOW the t-shirt is finally gone. A running knee in the corner misses for Morales though and he might have blown it out. There’s a lot of blowing in this match. Muraco moves in on it with a leg snap out of the corner. Clipped to a spinning toe hold being countered by Pedro. Morales, ever the genius, tries a backbreaker (despite sending Muraco’s shoulder into the post on the counter) and reinjures his knee. Boston Crab (Pedro’s finisher) is quickly broken by the ropes. Pedro tries a slam but the knee buckles and Muraco falls on top for the pin and the second title change in two matches on this tape.

Rating: C-. Not great or anything but again it’s really cool to see these rarities as you always hear about how these legends held titles but you never see how they won them. Pedro was far better in the 70s than 80s as he was washed up at this point, but he could still put people over, which is what he did here. Decent stuff, although a lot of stalling hurt it.

Pedro would leave for awhile before returning in the mid 80s. Here he is on January 11, 1986.

Pedro Morales vs. Terry Funk

We’re in Boston here in I’d guess early 86. Gene tells us about Morales holding what we would now call the Triple Crown. Morales is at the end of his career here but he was still big enough of a draw to be brought into the big New England crowds. Morales hammers away and Funk is all messed up early on. Then again he might just be Terry Funk. Funk comes back in and throws Pedro onto the announce table.

Morales may have injured a hamstring on the fall. Funk hammers him in the head and does a little Ali Shuffle. He keeps peppering Morales and they go out onto the table again. Funk actually pulls the headset off of Gorilla who implies a showdown later on. That could actually be worth seeing. Or maybe that was Jimmy Hart. Pedro goes shoulder first into the post and this has been totally one sided so far.

Funk pulls some tape out of his tights and chokes away. Morales gets it though and here comes the firey Latin temper that he was famous for. He knocks Terry around as Jimmy is freaking out on the floor. Funk gets knocked to the floor and the steps get turned over. He goes head first into them and hides under them like a true cowardly heel. Pedro teases jumping off the top but settles for drilling Funk upside the head. Funk does a perfect Flair Flop off the apron to the floor.

I don’t think I’ve seen anything other than punches in this match so far and that’s made it awesome. Funk is all over the place, looking either drunk or old. In other words, he’s perfectly fine. Back to the floor again and Terry finds a wooden chair under the ring but it doesn’t get used. Instead Pedro punches him some more and kicks him in the back. Funk gets his trunks pulled down and that’s an image I really didn’t need to see twice in one night. Jimmy slips Funk the Megaphone and a shot to the head ends this.

Rating: B-. This was a great old school brawl from two great old school brawlers. Funny how something like that works isn’t it? Pedro was more or less done after this and it’s not like Funk ever did much in his run in the WWF. At least after this he went back to the NWA where he was much more successful.

Next up was a feud to get the Intercontinental Title back, including this match in MSG on August 25, 1986.

Intercontinental Title: Randy Savage vs. Pedro Morales

Randy grabs a headlock to start but Pedro shoves him away to freak Savage out. A shoulder block gets two for Pedro so Savage throws a chair in. Back in and Randy gets a foreign object to rake Morales’ eyes. Pedro is sent into the barricade and Savage drops the top rope ax handle. A suplex back in is good for two but Pedro gets in a left hand to knock Savage out of the air. Back in and a sunset flip, small package and backslide get two each for Pedro before a big left hand knocks Savage to the floor. Savage misses a chair shot and gets counted out.

Rating: D+. This was part of the Savage vs. Legends tour as he had a feud with Sammartino over the Intercontinental Title as well. There wasn’t anything to see here but the fans in MSG were going to get behind the legendary Morales. This was the usually dull Morales match and not much more.

Off to the Big Event a few days later.

Harley Race vs. Pedro Morales

They’re both old and they’re both fat. They’re also rather slow and it’s not interesting at all anymore. The main event is next so this is likely Hogan’s effort to make people forget the previous good match so that he looks good next. He did it to the whole company in about 8 years with WCW. The referees have more or less sucked all night as they never count fast enough. Race gets a double leg trip and uses the ropes for the easy pin. Nothing match.

Pedro would hook up with Title Santana for a brief run at the end of his run. Here’s one of their matches on Superstars, January 31, 1987.

Tito Santana/Pedro Morales vs. Nikolai Volkoff/Iron Sheik

WOW there are a lot of stereotypes in there. Morales is a guy that I haven’t gotten to comment on much but he’s a straight up legend. He’s the first Triple Crown winner if nothing else. Volkoff’s singing was a great gimmick. I love that. The heels get jumped like good heels should and the Latin stereotypes take over. Morales and Volkoff start us off and Morales is put simply old and fat.

He’s still firey though so I can give him that one. Sheik’s in ring work is underrated I think. For no apparent reason we get no mention of Sheik and Morales being former world champions. That would be a big selling point to me if nothing else. Slick swings the cane but I think it hits Volkoff by mistake. It’s not really clear though. Tito beats up Slick and that might be a DQ.

Rating: C+. They were feuding so it adds up at least. Yeah the faces win on a DQ…I guess because of Slick interfering? Butch Reed comes out which I guess sets up…Koko vs. Reed at Mania? Actually what we saw here was pretty good. Nothing great but for four guys that are ok and two of which are over the hill, not bad at all. I guess Reed is feuding with Santana now. Whatever.

Morales is an interesting case as he certain has the credentials (first Triple Crown winner and longest combined reign ever as Intercontinental Champion) but has basically been forgotten. When is the last time you heard his name mentioned in modern WWE? You just do not hear about him anymore and it’s kind of interesting to see. His in ring work certainly wasn’t the best but he could get a crowd behind him and that’s all he needed to do, especially if people came to see him.

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Wrestler of the Day – September 15: Beth Phoenix

Time for the perfect combination of beauty and power: Beth Phoenix.

Phoenix got her start in 2001 and we’ll pick things up in 2004 at a WXW show. I don’t know where that is either.

Elite 8 Second Round: Beth Phoenix vs. Angel Williams

Angel is better known as Angelina Love. Phoenix comes in holding her neck so Williams grabs two quick rollups for a near fall each. We quickly hit a chinlock to work on Beth’s neck but Phoenix comes back with a gutwrench suplex. Angel slaps on a dragon sleeper but Tracy Brooks and a chick named Belladonna come out for a distraction, allowing Beth to grab a quick rollup for the pin.

Beth would sign with WWE and be sent to OVW, including this match on March 22, 2006.

Beth Phoenix vs. Trinity

If nothing else Trinity comes out to Sad But True by Metallica, making her even more awesome than usual. Trinity takes Beth down and hammers away with forearms, sending Phoenix running out to the floor. Back in and Beth tries a Whiplash but Trinity slips out, only to get speared down for two. An O’Connor Roll gets two for Trinity so Beth slaps her a lot. Trinity calmly grabs her for a Rock Bottom and Beth rolls to the floor. Trinity goes up for a dive but Beth moves, giving us a great looking crash. Beth smiles at Trinity probably having about nineteen broken bones and takes her back in for a super Whiplash and the pin.

Rating: C. Not bad here but I’ve always liked Trinity. That missed dive and the Whiplash (fireman’s carry into a sitout Death Valley Driver) looked awesome. Both girls were nailing it here but the time hurt them a lot. Trinity never did much in WWE but was kind of a deal in TNA a few years earlier.

It was off to WWE soona fter that with Beth getting an early title shot at No Mercy 2007.

Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Candice Michelle

Candace is defending and looks like an idiot with the angel’s wings on her outfit. Beth throws her into the corner to start but Candice manages a nice bridging cradle for two. She goes for Beth’s arm but we get the Davey Boy Smith/Shawn Michaels move of the pullup from the ground. Powerslam gets two and it’s off to a chinlock.

Actually it’s a cobra clutch but it’s the same idea. Candice climbs the corner ala Bret vs. Austin for two but can’t break the hold. She finally rams Beth into the buckle to escape and a top rope cross body gets two, as does a sunset flip out of the corner. Beth grabs her into a fisherman’s buster which is enough for the pin and the title.

Rating: C-. Candice was supposed to be the next big thing in the Divas division but this was her only title reign and not many people really remember her. Beth would become a much bigger deal with multiple title reigns, including the one that is going on now which will seemingly never end. This wasn’t bad.

Here’s a defense of that title at Armageddon 2007.

Women’s Title: Mickie James vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth is champion here. Mickie tries to attack the knees but that doesn’t get her anywhere. Neither does a rana attempt. Beth puts on a dragon sleeper and then the double chickenwing which Beth escapes. Now the rana works and there’s a Thesz Press. Neckbreaker puts Beth down but she didn’t cover. And never mind as Beth hits a release fisherman’s suplex for the pin to retain.

Rating: D-. The match sucked but any time you have Beth in a shirt and Mickie in small amounts of clothing, the match simply isn’t a failure. The match was just a way to give the fans a breather before we get to the main event, which is all that’s left. Nothing of note here and Beth dominated the majority of the match.

Off to Wrestlemania XXIV.

Maria/Ashley vs. Beth Phoenix/Melina

This is a Playboy lumberjill match with Snoop Dogg as master of ceremonies in a golf cart. Snoop of course comes out with all of the lumberjills because that’s what Snoop would do. Ashley is her usual self and Maria looks great. Also, her theme song continues to be ridiculously catchy. Oh and Beth is Women’s Champion and has Santino with her. Melina has uh….wings.

Ashley tries to fight Beth and is immediately thrown around. Maria tries a double hip toss with Ashley which goes as well as you would expect two talentless models to be able to do. Melina is thrown to the floor and beaten up by the good Divas and takes a bad Bronco Buster from Maria. Ashley gets a running start to climb to the middle ropes to punch Melina as this mess continues. Melina takes over and catapults Ashley into a bearhug by Beth.

Melina hits a moonsault off of Beth’s shoulders for two before we get a stupid trip from Ashley. Off to Maria for some kicks as the lights go out. They finally get a spotlight on as this continues to fall apart. Maria tries to counter the Glam Slam into a bulldog but can’t even do that right. Melina breaks up the pin and we get heel miscommunication. Maria hits a kind of top rope bulldog but Santino breaks up the pin. Lawler punches out Santino but Beth hits a fisherman’s buster for the pin on Maria.

Rating: F+. That’s ALL for Maria looking great. I forgot this match was a lumberjill match after about a minute and the rest of the girls couldn’t even be seen after that long. Maria was TERRIBLE here and she was the better worker on her team. This didn’t work at all and was the disaster to end all disasters for Divas matches.

Here’s a lame match with an awesome visual at One Night Stand 2008.

Beth Phoenix vs. Melina

Recaps? Context? Point to the match? Who needs those stupid things? This is an I Quit match. We get a clip from Judgment Day of Beth hitting a double backbreaker on Melina and Mickie at the same time which is rather awesome. Dang it’s fun to watch Melina gyrate. Beth backs her into the ropes immediately to intimidate her so Melina grabs a guillotine choke of all things and Beth is in trouble early.

Beth easily counters out of it but it was working for awhile. Backbreaker gives Beth control and a bow and arrow has Melina in trouble. Something resembling a face jam/tornado DDT to Beth sets up an Indian Deathlock with a bridge which is always awesome looking. Beth crawls to the floor because ropes mean nothing. That looked pretty cool at least. Over the shoulder backbreaker has Melina in trouble as there is no flow to this match at all.

The fans want Chyna which should tell you how uninteresting this is. JR and King kind of shut up for a bit as Beth puts on a chinlock. Melina manages to send her into the middle buckle and Beth’s shoulder hits the post a bit later. Headscissors sets up an armbar, almost like La Mistica. Cross Armbreaker goes on as the crowd flat out does not care. Off to an arm choke but Beth is like screw that and hits a powerbomb to break it. Seated double chickenwing goes on and Melina looks like she’s about to cry. Beth then grabs the chin and pulls back to the point where Melina’s head is touching her own feet and that’s it.

Rating: D+. Another ridiculously boring match but at least Beth was hot. Seriously, other than that there was next to nothing going on here. Also, Divas don’t need ten minutes because it doesn’t take that long to go buy a Coke. Pretty weak match overall and nothing special in the slightest.

Beth would start dating Santino Marella, setting up this double title match at Summerslam 2008.

Intercontinental Title/Women’s Title: Glamarella vs. Mickie James/Kofi Kingston

Mickie and Kofi have both belts coming in but the winning team walks out with all the gold. Kofi is still relatively new here and has only won the IC Title once, as opposed to his 89 or so reigns now. The girls get things going with Beth easily overpowering James. Mickie comes back with some quick dropkicks for two before it’s off to Santino. James easily monkey flips him over before it’s off to Kofi for some of his usual stuff. The jumping punches in the corner have Santino on the floor where Beth yells at him.

Kingston loads up a charge but hangs on, only to send Santino jumping into Beth’s arms. Kofi pulls him back in but gets his neck snapped across the top rope for one. Beth beats on Kofi for a bit before bringing Santino back in for his basic offense. A suplex sets up a chinlock but Kofi fights up and butts heads with Santino, allowing for the double tags to the girls. Mickie cleans house and clotheslines Beth down before snapping off her hurricanrana on Beth. Kofi comes in and misses a charge like an idiot but the MickieDT puts Santino down. Beth decks Mickie and hits the Glam Slam for both titles.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing special and could have been on any given Raw. I don’t know of a better way they could have gotten the title on Santino though so you can’t fault the for trying. Kofi would begin his long float in the midcard which would last for the next several years other than a cup of coffee in the upper midcard. The girls looked good here but that’s about it.

Back to one of her original rivals at No Mercy 2008.

Women’s Title: Candice Michelle vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth is defending in the rematch from last year. Candice immediately kicks the knee out for two. A dropkick to the head of Beth as she’s getting up gets the same. An enziguri slows Phoenix down as Candice is starting off fast. A charge is caught and Beth rams her into the buckle to stop that cold.

Beth hooks a modified cross armbreaker which lasts for a few moments. Candice comes back with some of the weakest clotheslines I can ever remember. Her arms are TINY which is what makes them so weak. Beth puts her down and goes up top, only to get crotched and dropkicked for two. Santino had to make the save so Candice dropkicks him through the ropes. Back inside the glam Slam quickly ends this.

Rating: D+. Candice slowly fell down a mountain after she lost the title a year before this. Like I said her offense was mostly dropkicks and not very good ones at that. On top of that there were the clotheslines which were embarrassing. The Divas took a nosedive around this point as the good chicks were just not there with the talent other than one in a handful. Also there were two titles by this point which didn’t help anything at all.

Here’s Beth against a chick she fought about a million times, from Raw on January 19, 2009.

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Beth is Women’s Champion but this is non-title. This was before Kelly got good. Let that sink in for a minute. Kelly is in a Blackhawks jersey and tries to speed things up, only to get run over. Glam Slam and we’re done in about a minute.

We’ll jump ahead a bit to Bragging Rights 2009.

Michelle McCool/Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. Melina/Kelly Kelly/Gail Kim

Beth in blue is an amazing sight. This was when Michelle got really hot really fast. Look at the rosters. Who do you think is going to win? Beth and Gail start. Can’t believe I’m typing this but DANG at Michelle. All three Smackdown girls have been in there in less than a minute. Kelly tries a sunset flip. It’s bad. This is just painfully uninteresting as there is less than zero chance for Raw to win two in a row. I mean the match is ok, but people just couldn’t care any less as there is zero drama. Crowd is more or less dead too. Glam Slam ends Melina for the pin.

Rating: W. As in who cares? Like I said, the idea that THIS was going to decide the cup and not the big tag was just ridiculous and it crippled the match. Also the match was just generic as all goodness. This could have been any other Divas match which really shows how bland the division is at this point.

Beth had a chance to get the title back at Extreme Rules 2010.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Michelle McCool

This is an Extreme Makeover match. Michelle looks great of course. The music helps a lot here for her I think. There’s a table of makeup etc at ringside. Beth gets a semi-pop. Can someone shut Beth up? Please? Michelle is possibly the best women’s athlete ever? Really? That’s just pitiful. Basically we’re just making fun of Vickie and using random weapons like hairspray and ironing boards. Beth counters the hairspray again and it’s one on one now. Vickie has a broom. Make your own jokes. Glam Slam ends it like it should have.

Rating: D. And that’s mainly due to Beth’s awesome cleavage in this one. This was a comedy match to put it nicely and it didn’t come off well to put it nicely. The girls looked hot, but having them use things like makeup and ironing boards? Really? The division was just such a mess at this point and this didn’t help things.

A torn ACL kept Beth out of action for months but she was back in time for TLC 2010 and this tag team tables match.

Beth Phoenix/Natalya vs. Laycool

Quick recap video which is of the table on Friday which didn’t work. No tagging here thank goodness. The pink table with the painting from Friday is brought in as Laycool is down early. Crowd is QUIET here. Lawler says he’s never seen a Diva go through a table. That’s just amusing. Double fireman’s carry by Beth is very impressive. Striker makes an important point: any method of going through the table counts. Also it’s only one Diva required for a win.

Laycool in control now as the fans do not care at all. Beth is on the floor now as Laycool takes over. SICK landing by Beth as her foot gets hooked on a rope and she lands straight on her back/head. That was painful as all goodness, it had to be. Michelle sets for a Faithbreaker (Styles Clash) through a table on Nattie but Beth comes back for the save.

Not table for Michelle (“JUST WAIT UNTIL MARK HEARS ABOUT THIS!!!”) as Layla rakes Beth’s eyes. Layla beats on Beth for awhile but can’t suplex her through it. Double gorilla press by the blondes to Layla until Michelle kicks both in the ribs. Natalya puts Layla on top of Michelle and puts them BOTH in a Sharpshooter at the same time. TAKE THAT BRET!!!

The nice chicks set up the tables but Michelle sends Beth to the floor to make it 2-1 again. They set for a double superplex but Beth saves again. A lot of near finishes in this one indeed. Down goes Beth so they set for it again but they’re shoved off. The table DID NOT BREAK so Natalya is like screw it and splashes them through it to end this.

Rating: C+. This wasn’t as bad as you would have thought as Laycool fought them off far better than people would have predicted. It was a good match even but did anyone ever think Laycool had a realistic shot out there? Not a bad match or anything but at the same time it didn’t really get me into the match and it kind of dragged. Still fun though and that Sharpshooter was GREAT.

Time for another title run. From Hell in a Cell 2011.

Divas Title: Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Kelly runs at her and hits what are supposed to be Thesz Presses (popular move tonight) and the screaming headscissors which is countered into a backbreaker. Beth takes over and chokes her down with what looks like a dragon sleeper. Off to another backbreaker but this time she bends Kelly over her knee but Kelly counters into a rollup for two. Slingshot suplex gets two for Beth.

Kelly starts her comeback and uses generic offense and a neckbreaker for two. She tries the bad bulldog but Beth counters into a Glam Slam attempt. Beth pounds away in the corner but Kelly fights out and hits the handspring elbow. Cole calls it vintage and Great Muta rolls his eyes somewhere. Top rope bulldog by Kelly gets a very close two. Eve and Nattie get into it on the floor and Eve goes flying into the barricade.

K2 is countered and Beth kicks Kelly between the legs for some reason. Beth hooks up that freaky submission that Natalya has been using lately and Nattie gets on the mic and tells Kelly to scream. Kelly makes the ropes and Natalya pops her with the mic which somehow the referee didn’t hear. Glam Slam FINALLY ends Kelly’s reign at 8:34. Yes they’re that long on time.

Rating: C. This was way too long and I can’t get over the ending: Beth Phoenix needed a mic shot to beat Kelly Kelly? I don’t get that at all as they’ve made Beth look weak already with two straight losses but at least she finally has the belt. I’d assume this sets up Eve vs. Kelly as they fill in as much time as they can for the Kharma return in like another 7 months or however long it is.

Another defense at Vengeance 2011.

Divas Title: Eve Torres vs. Beth Phoenix

We get a clip from earlier in the day with the evil girls attacking Kelly as Eve makes the save. I guess Kelly is Crazy is going into the pool of the forgotten right? Eve has new music too and it sounds awful. At least we can look at her awesome legs. Kelly and Natalya are banned from ringside. Eve grabs a sunset flip to start and we’re talking about Beth’s underwear for some reason.

They fight over to the ropes…and Beth is now handcuffed to the ropes via something on her own outfit. Eve kicks away and Beth is free. Uh, point to that? Beth takes over on the floor and gets two back in the ring. The fans are bored out of their minds here which is saying a lot as they were hot for the first half hour.

Gutbuster kind of move gets two and we’re off to our second rest hold in a minute. Beth slaps her head and screams at her to cry. Eve starts her comeback and puts Beth down with a clothesline and a flipping splash for two. Eve gets some kind of choke out while she on Beth’s shoulders and it turns into something resembling a triangle choke. The cool looking submission doesn’t work though because that might get it over as a finisher and Eve has one of those already. Glam Slam is countered into a rollup for two. Eve gets a kick in and goes up for the moonsault but Beth moves. Glam Slam ends this at 7:16.

Rating: D+. I’ve watched a lot of wrestling in my time and I don’t recall a division or story that I was less interested in than the Divas in WWE at the moment. I mean there is nothing of interest or note at all about them. They kill the crowds other than Kelly and the matches are as unnatural looking as any I’ve ever seen. I mean there is nothing interesting to them at all and I dread watching them every show. The match wasn’t bad. I just didn’t want to watch it.

Another defense from Elimination Chamber 2012.

Divas Title: Tamina Snuka vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth is wearing something inspired by Piper. This match could be subtitled “How many times can we remind you that Tamina is Jimmy Snuka’s daughter in a last ditch effort to make you care about her”. Tamina goes up quickly but gets knocked down to the outside. Beth pounds on her and Tamina barely gets back inside. Tamina gets up and hits a Samoan Drop but the Splash is broken up. Superplex gets two for Beth and Tamina chops her down. Superfly Splash gets two. Tamina goes up again but Beth brings her down, sends her into the buckle and the Glam Slam retains the title at 7:00.

Rating: D+. Call me sexist, call me a chauvinist, call me whatever you want, but I’m bored out of my mind every time the Divas are on screen. They’re waiting on Beth vs. Kharma which basically means they’re spending a year putting the whole division on hold, but at the end of the day is anyone going to care? I mean, who is Kharma going to feud with once she beats Beth? The division means nothing and it’s so uninteresting. The US Title can’t get on PPV because we have to see this. Right.

We’ll wrap up Beth’s WWE run on Raw, October 29, 2012.

AJ vs. Beth Phoenix

Beth glares at AJ to start and says AJ should be scared. Beth shoves her and AJ goes nuts, but Beth slams her down onto the mat. AJ gets her face rubbed into the mat and we head to the floor. AJ gets rammed into the barricade but back inside she grabs a rollup for the pin at 2:08.

Vickie comes out post match and demands more from AJ. Beth jumps her so Vickie says restart the match. Glam Slam gets the pin in like ten seconds.

That would be Beth’s last match as she retired soon after due to some personal issues. Beth was a good choice for the dominant Diva as she was big, strong, and talented but still very good looking as opposed to the usual freakish looking monsters. Unfortunately she didn’t have much talent around her and it showed with a lot of bad matches. Still though, she did her thing quite well.

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