ECW On Sci Fi
Date: October 2, 2007
Location: Nutter Center, Dayton, Ohio
Attendance: 3,000
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

It’s time to find out who is going to challenge CM Punk for the ECW World Title with the finals of the Championship Chase. That being said, Big Daddy V seems primed to be the next big monster challenger. The problem is I’m not sure what he can do outside of a short title shot. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Vince McMahon to open things up with a major announcement: John Cena has suffered a torn pectoral muscle and we see a clip of last night’s match with Mr. Kennedy where Cena was injured. We also see Randy Orton attacking Cena after the match, which is where Vince says the injury took place (makes sense). As a result, Cena will be out of action for six to twelve months, so the WWE Title is officially vacant. That won’t last for very long though, as the new champion will be crowned on Sunday at No Mercy in a way to be announced.

Here is CM Punk for a chat of his own. Punk says we are five days away from No Mercy and he should be ready for whoever becomes #1 contender. Instead he can’t get his mind off of Big Daddy V, who laid him out last week. Punk respects V, who also has his attention. Matt Striker and V pop up on screen, with Striker saying V’s message is clear: he wants the title. As for Punk, good luck on his upcoming match.

CM Punk vs. Mike Knox

Non-title. Punk starts cranking on the wrist to start and takes him to the mat for a hammerlock. Knox punches away and hits a dropkick before grabbing a hammerlock of his own. Some knees to the arm set up a hammerlock slam but Punk is up with a running dropkick for a breather. We take a break and come back with Knox snapping Punk’s throat across the top rope for two and putting on the chinlock. A hard clothesline sets up another chinlock but Punk fights up and hits a dropkick. The running knee connects in the corner but the bulldog is blocked. That’s fine with Punk, who picks him up for the GTS and the pin.

Rating: C. I know they’re trying something with Knox, but there are only so many ways around him being a generic villain. He has some size and some power but that’s the extent of anything about him. He’s fine as a guy who is there, but on a show with only an hour a week, you need something a little more than basic villains and wrestlers.

Video on Tommy Dreamer.

Here is Balls Mahoney, who would like an answer from Kelly Kelly on their proposed date. Kelly comes out and, after being asked again, says yes. Cue Miz and the rest of Extreme Expose, with Miz mocking Mahoney. He tries to get to Kelly, but Mahoney knocks him to the floor. That doesn’t bother Miz though, as he owns Extreme Expose’s management contract. If Kelly doesn’t come with them right now, she is off the team and out of ECW. Kelly reluctantly leaves with them.

Video on Elijah Burke.

No Mercy rundown.

Elijah Burke vs. Tommy Dreamer

For the No Mercy title shot. Dreamer, in the dew rag, goes with the early rollup for two before tying Burke in the Tree of Woe. The running dropkick connects for two and Dreamer throws him outside. We take a break and come back with Burke grabbing a chinlock. Dreamer fights up so Burke punches him down, only to get caught with a flapjack. Burke is back up with a whip into the corner and there’s the headstand elbow for two but Dreamer is right back with the DDT for the pin out of nowhere.

Rating: C-. This felt really fast and ultimately, neither option was all that interesting. Burke vs. Punk has been done several times and Dreamer getting a title shot is only there for nostalgia. It actually would have been more interesting to have Stevie Richards in this spot, though I can get why WWE would not want to go there.

Post match Armando Estrada says the Elimination Chase isn’t over, so Dreamer has to beat one more man to win the title shot.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Big Daddy V

V slams him down and hits a falling headbutt before standing on….the ropes near Dreamer. The closeup showed that V wasn’t actually touching Dreamer, showing that closeups are not always a good idea in wrestling. V tosses Dreamer again but misses a headbutt, allowing Dreamer to strike away. That doesn’t matter as V hits a big boot and a Samoan drop, setting up the big elbow for the fast pin. I’m not wild on them throwing in a last second curve like this but it means Dreamer doesn’t get a feature match so things are looking up.

Overall Rating: C. Other than the Miz/Mahoney/Kelly Kelly stuff, this was all about going to the more logical title match rather than Burke or Dreamer. It might not make sense for what they have been doing over the last few weeks, but it is the right call for what they have available. Not a great show, but it dragged them to the better option for No Mercy.

 

 

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Monday Night Raw
Date: March 7, 2022
Location: Rocket Mortgage Fieldhouse, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Jimmy Smith, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and that means we are probably going to start some of the harder pushes to the show this week. In theory we should be getting some more matches set for the show, as probably about half of it has been set. There is also a Tag Team Title match this week so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with clips from Madison Square Garden where Roman Reigns and the Usos laid out Brock Lesnar and left him bloody to end the show.

Opening sequence.

Here are Kevin Owens and Seth Rollins for a chat before their Tag Team Title shot. Rollins is fired up and Owens talks about how the deck has been stacked against them all year. Tonight though, they’re taking the titles and going to Wrestlemania! That’s great, but they have to compete in the dump known as Dallas. Being there with Rollins will make it more bearable though and we look at some clips of how we got to this title match. Owens goes on a rant against the other team, including saying that Shorty G. and Otis suck.

Cue Alpha Academy, now with a SHHHHHHHUSH at the start of their entrance. Chad Gable lists off his resume and throws in a THANK YOU regarding how they are going to retain their titles. We cut to RKBro in the back, where the team is rather fired up to get their titles back. Riddle digs it.

Tag Team Titles: Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens vs. RKBro vs. Alpha Academy

Alpha Academy is defending, there are three people in the ring at once and you can only tag your own partner. Rollins takes Riddle and Gable down to start and hands it off to Owens to take over. Owens steps on Riddle’s bare foot and hits a DDT for two before running Gable over as well. A Vader Bomb elbow gets two on Gable and it’s back to Rollins with a top rope crossbody to Riddle and Gable.

The two of them are sent outside so Rollins can hit a suicide dive, followed by Owens’ Swanton for two on Gable as we take a break. Back with Otis getting to clean house, including a splash for two on Riddle, with Otis pulling him up. The neck crank goes on for a bit before Otis has to hammer Riddle down to break up the comeback. The Vader Bomb misses though and the hot tag brings in Orton to clean house on Gable and the returning Rollins.

A double hanging DDT takes the two of them down but Gable counters the RKO into the ankle lock. That’s broken up and Orton hits the RKO on Rollins, with Owens making the save. Orton drops Gable and Owens onto the announcers’ table, and RKBro combines to drop Otis onto it as we take another break.

Back again with Riddle hitting the Floating Bro for two on Rollins with Owens making the save. Otis gives Orton a World’s Strongest Slam and it’s a Vader Bomb into Gable’s moonsault for two as Rollins makes the save. Gable slips out of a Rollins’ superplex attempt so let’s just make it a Tower of Doom with Owens sending everyone down instead. Everything breaks down and it’s a big brawl to send us to a third break.

Back again with most everyone on the floor and Riddle going up top. Rollins breaks that up and gets two off an Alberto double stomp. Riddle gets Rollins into a triangle choke but it’s Gable making the save this time. Gable hits rolling German suplexes on Orton, Rollins and Riddle before going up top for the moonsault….which Orton catches in an RKO for some AMAZING timing. Rollins and Owens break that up though and it’s a buckle bomb to Gable into a Stunner into the Stomp but Riddle throws Rollins out and steals the pin and the titles at 27:02.

Rating: B. This got a lot of time (a crazy amount of time for a Raw match) and the title change actually shocked me. After that RKO to Gable, it would have been almost a letdown if they didn’t get the titles here so this is a nice surprise. Good match, though that is assuming you can ignore “HOW WILL THEY GO TO WRESTLEMANIA IF THEY LOSE?????”, which is a dumb story even by WWE standards.

Owens and Rollins are devastated, with Rollins walking off in a trance and Owens talking to himself. Orton talks about how he has never had this much fun in twenty years and he will actually call Riddle his friend. THEY’RE GOING TO WRESTLEMANIA!

Post break, Owens is still in shock.

24/7 Title: Dana Brooke vs. Tamina

Brooke is defending and has Reggie in her corner, while Tamina has Akira Tozawa. Earlier today, Brooke asked Reggie for a good luck kiss and got just that. On the other hand, Tozawa asked Tamina for one and was kissed hard into a wall for his efforts. Tamina clotheslines her down to start but gets caught with the handspring elbow in the corner. Another clothesline takes Brooke down again though and we hit the Boston crab. Brooke finally powers out and grabs a bad looking rollup to retain at 1:45. Believe it or not, Brooke survived in her hometown.

Post match Tozawa says Brooke cheated and says the winner of the match is the love of his life, Tamina. Tozawa preps for another kiss but she walks by him, teases coming back, blows him a kiss, and then leaves.

Seth Rollins still can’t talk.

We look at Roman Reigns attacking Brock Lesnar at MSG again.

Here is the Miz for a chat. Miz says he’s home and says that the cheers he receives are respect. We see Dominik Mysterio insulting Logan Paul, who is Miz’s special guest this week. Cue Paul, who says it is good to be home and he is honored to be going to Wrestlemania as Miz’s partner. Paul talks about growing up in Cleveland and went to high school here, with Cleveland making him the man he is today.

They don’t like Dominik riding on Rey’s coat tails because that isn’t how they do it here in Cleveland. Speaking of Cleveland, here is another Cleveland native: Jerry Lawler. After a rather nice reaction, Lawler lists off some Ohio towns where he lived over the years and thanks Miz for inviting him here.

Lawler looks at the Wrestlemania sign and thinks it would be great to have the show right here in Cleveland. Miz doesn’t think much of that idea because Cleveland isn’t exactly a Wrestlemania city. Miz: “YOU WERE JUST CHEERING ME AND NOW YOU’RE BOOING ME???” This city couldn’t even handle the pyro without the lake catching on fire. No one stays here, just like when the Browns or LeBron James left. Miz says he and Paul can go on to a real Wrestlemania city and leaves, with an unsure Paul following. This was kind of a weird segment as I’m not sure what it accomplished other than having Lawler out there.

We look back at Dolph Ziggler’s recent issues with Tommaso Ciampa.

Bron Breakker and Tommaso Ciampa are here to face Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode in a rematch of last week’s NXT. Breakker is excited and ready to go before defending the NXT Title against Ziggler and Ciampa tomorrow night.

The Street Profits are asked what they think about having no path to Wrestlemania but point out that they beat RKBro last week.

Bron Breakker/Tommaso Ciampa vs. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode

Breakker shrugs off Roode’s headlock to start and muscles him up for a suplex. It’s off to Ciampa for a clothesline and a chinlock before being driven into the wrong corner. That’s enough to send Ciampa outside and we take a break. Back with Ciampa in trouble and getting caught with a double back elbow.

Ciampa manages a jumping knee and it’s back to Breakker to clean house. Ziggler knees Breakker in the face for a breather but the gorilla press….is broken up by Roode. A rollup gives Ziggler two but Breakker charges into the post. The Zig Zag connects for two with Ciampa making the save. Another jumping knee sends Roode outside and the gorilla press powerslam finishes Ziggler at 9:37.

Rating: C+. Breakker getting to debut on Raw is a nice touch as it’s clear that he’s just here as a guest star. I like the idea of presenting some NXT wrestlers on Raw every week, if nothing else just for the sake of building up some of what they’re doing. Good match here, as Breakker looked composed enough on the bigger stage.

Post match Ziggler says that was one win and promises to take the title tomorrow night when Breakker crumbles.

Video on Omos.

Omos is asked if he has a path to Wrestlemania (OH SHUT UP ALREADY!) and asks how many people he has to dominate.

Omos vs. Apollo Crews

Commander Azeez is here with Crews and Omos says he’s next. Omos runs Crews over to start and we’re already on the double arm crank. The rather slow paced Omos forearms Crews off the apron and out to the floor in a crash. Back in and Crews hits a jumping enziguri but gets chokeslammed for the pin at 2:42.

Post match Azeez comes in to check on Crews so Omos laughs at him.

We look back at AJ Styles accepting Edge’s Wrestlemania challenge, sending Edge into a rage and crushing him with two Conchairtos.

Here is Edge, but his entrance is very different this time, as his music cuts off and a dark spotlight comes on him as he walks to the ring. After taking his sweet time getting into the ring, Edge says “you think you know me?”. Tonight he is going to talk to AJ Styles but make sure you put the kids to bed first. Edge did what he did last week to bring out the real AJ Styles.

It was a new Edge too, as he pealed back his head and saw the real him, which he had never seen before. That is an Edge that he has fallen in love with and now he feels in control of everything that happens in this ring. Edge is standing on the mountain of omnipotence and the view is phenomenal. A closeup of Edge’s face wraps it up. The entrance was good but it felt like this got cut off before he got to the point.

Kevin Owens never wants to feel how he felt after that loss again. He just had an epiphany and it is the idea that is going to change his entire Wrestlemania future. There are details to iron out, but he has a plan that he will reveal later tonight.

We look at the Reigns/Lesnar MSG clip again.

Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Carmella/Queen Zelina

Non-title but if Morgan and Ripley win, they are added to the Wrestlemania Women’s Tag Team Title match. No entrance for the champs here as Morgan sends Carmella into the corner to start. That just annoys Carmella so Ripley comes in and cleans house until Zelina hits a tornado DDT. Carmella superkicks Ripley into the steps and we take a break.

Back with Vega cranking on Ripley but she kicks Carmella in the face (with a Munsters reference on commentary), allowing the hot tag to Morgan. Everything breaks down and Graces gets off commentary to check on Carmella. Zelina kicks Morgan in the face but there is no Carmella to tag. Vega yells at Carmella, who is talking to Graves, allowing Morgan to….not really hit the Codebreaker. Ripley comes in and hits Riptide for the pin at 9:03.

Rating: D. It was sloppy, it was long and the ending was about promoting WWE’s newest stupid reality show. This was one of the more annoying things I’ve seen WWE do in a long time and it sets up the “let’s throw everyone in one match at Wrestlemania for the most worthless belts in the company” deal, because that’s easier than putting in some work to make a better story.

Vader is going to the Hall of Fame. In his words, it’s time.

Austin Theory vs. Finn Balor

Non-title and after a video on Austin Theory vs. Pat McAfee, we’re ready to go. Theory takes him up against the ropes for some shots to the back to start but Balor gets in a few shots of his own to take over. We take a break and come back with Theory in control and knocking Balor down again, but ATL is escaped. A running dropkick into the corner knocks Theory silly but here’s Damian Priest to break up the Coup de Grace for the DQ at 8:36.

Rating: C. This was just kind of there and that isn’t a great sign for the start of Balor’s title reign. Priest vs. the Demon is the kind of Wrestlemania idea that writes itself and odds are that is where we’re going. I’m not sure how well the match will go, but at least both Balor and Theory have a likely Wrestlemania match set up.

Post match Priest powerbombs Balor and Theory adds the ATL for the sake of picture taking.

Bianca Belair (now in a Don’t Touch The Hair top) is ready to put the EST in Wrestlemania. Of note: Becky Lynch was said to be injured during an incident with Belair the previous night and isn’t here.

Here is Kevin Owens for his big Wrestlemania idea. He doesn’t have a match to Wrestlemania so he needs a path to get to the event. That’s why he is going to have the biggest Kevin Owen Show of all time, but that means he needs a special guest. He needs someone from Texas, so maybe he could have JBL. Nah, as the horns on his limo are more interesting. Booker T? The guy who spent most of his career as part of a tag team called HARLEM Heat? Shawn Michaels is a proud Texan…but Owens is a proud Canadian so on behalf of Bret Hart, SHAWN MICHAELS IS NOT INVITED!

That leaves one Texas legend and he is someone who is probably drinking a lot of beer. When he was in WWE, he had to wear knee braces to get through his matches. Owens would love to have this guy come here so he can give him a Stunner and then pour out a glass of milk. He finally gets to it and challenges Steve Austin to Wrestlemania. You knew that was coming in some way so this is about as good as it’s going to get.

Overall Rating: C-. Most of the wrestling was good, but a few of the big talking segments (Miz, Edge) kind of flopped. They did set up/advance some things for Wrestlemania, but this HOW WILL THEY GET THERE stuff is dreadful. It treats fans like they have never watched Wrestlemania before as there is no reason to believe that most of these people won’t be on the show in some way. There are other ways to set up a Wrestlemania match and hearing the same thing over and over again all night got old fast. There were some good parts here, but it felt like WWE was overthinking the build to the show more often than not.

Results
RKBro b. Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens and Alpha Academy – Stomp to Gable
Dana Brooke b. Tamina – Rollup
Bron Breakker/Tommaso Ciampa b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Gorilla press powerslam to Ziggler
Omos b. Apollo Crews – Chokeslam
Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley b. Queen Zelina/Carmella – Riptide to Zelina
Finn Balor b. Austin Theory via DQ when Damian Priest interfered

 

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Wrestlemania XII
Date: March 31, 1996
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 18,853
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Vince McMahon

Much like last year, there’s nothing else to talk about besides the main event. This is all about Shawn vs. Bret and they’re not even trying to hide it. The other big match on the card is Diesel vs. Undertaker but it’s so far behind the World Title match that it’s not fair to mention them in the same breath. Let’s get to it.

Before we get to the show, here’s a bonus that probably should have been on the main card (at least on paper). Occasionally WWF would air a match on their pre-show (known as the Kickoff Show in modern times) and I’ll include them if they’re available. There were dark matches for years before Wrestlemania would go on the air but this is the first that was actually recorded.

Free For All: Tag Team Titles: Godwinns vs. Bodydonnas

This is a tournament final for the vacant titles. The Bodydonnas (Skip and Zip, a pair of exercise enthusiasts) have Sunny, a rather attractive manager and the Godwinns (Henry O. and Phineas I. (get it?), hog farmers) have Hillbilly Jim in their corner. Of note there’s a big blimp flying around over the lower arena, making it practically impossible for fans sitting behind it to see a thing.

Henry and Zip start things off and a wheelbarrow slam gives the Godwinns early control. Phineas comes in and has one of his fits as he clears the ring. The fans aren’t exactly thrilled by any of this. Things settle back down and it’s Henry catapulting Zip over the top and down onto Skip for a nice crash to get the crowd into things a bit. For some reason Phineas tries to come in (he never was that bright) and the Bodydonnas take over with a double slingshot suplex.

Skip drops Zip into a legdrop onto Henry but a Rocket Launcher misses. The cold tag brings in Phineas to clean house and Skip is in trouble. Phineas loads up the Slop Drop (reverse DDT) but Sunny gets on the apron and pulls up her skirt to flash Phineas, allowing Skip to roll him up for the pin and the titles at 5:24.

Rating: D-. Thankfully these things would get better later on because this was terrible. It’s probably better that this wasn’t on the main show as people really didn’t need to see how dismal the tag division had become at this point. There were so many lame gimmick teams like this and they took years to get better, but even then it only lasted for a short time. Terrible match but the right result.

The opening video is entirely focused on Bret vs. Shawn and their contrasting personalities with Bret being all about respect and Shawn being very in your face. They respect each other coming in and this is going to be a great test for both, even though looking back there was no question about which way this was going.

Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson/Yokozuna vs. British Bulldog/Owen Hart/Vader

Johnson is an athletic freak who would have been WWF World Champion had he not been so injury prone. Yokozuna is even heavier than ever and is in this match to get his hands on the heels’ manager Jim Cornette if the good guys win. Vader is Cornette’s new charge and really shouldn’t need an introduction. The big guys start brawling at the start and it’s Yokozuna’s team clearing house with Yokozuna launching Ahmed over the top and out onto Vader. That’s good for a better reaction than anything in the Tag Team Title match had and we’re less than a minute in.

Vader and Yokozuna slug it out to start with Yokozuna getting the better of it until Owen and Vader get him down in the corner. Vader pounds him down with rights and lefts but misses a splash, allowing the hot tag to Ahmed. We get some real house cleaning from the powerhouse but Vader gets in a shot from behind. Vince talks about a herd of buffalo until Owen dropkicks Johnson down, allowing Vader to come back in for some more big shots to the head.

Ahmed completely misses a clothesline to Owen (Johnson had a great look and awesome charisma but he couldn’t do the actual wrestling part) and makes the tag off to Jake for his signature punches. Owen blocks the DDT though and it’s off to Bulldog for a front facelock. The heels keep taking turns on Jake and Owen’s top rope elbow gets two. Bulldog’s running powerslam gets the same (that’s a big surprise) and so does a splash from Vader.

Jake finally avoids a legdrop and falls into the tag off to Yokozuna who pounds Vader down in the corner again. Owen takes the DDT but Jake has to intercept an interfering Cornette. That looks to set up a DDT on Cornette but Vader makes the save and Vader Bombs Jake for the pin at 13:11.

Rating: C-. This didn’t need to be so long and the teasing of Yokozuna getting his hands on Cornette didn’t go anywhere. They did however keep Jake in there for the most part and that’s the right idea given how good he was at selling a beating like that. Yokozuna was only good for quick bursts at this point and the weight would lead to him leaving the company. Vader was clearly on the rise as he was a monster but one who could move with very impressive speed, making him a great addition to the main event.

Call the Hotline!

We recap Roddy Piper vs. Goldust, which can be translated to “Razor Ramon had drug issues so here’s Piper instead.” Piper is a man’s man and President of the WWF, but Goldust (still very bizarre in actions here instead of just in name only) is attracted to Piper and his power. That’s not cool with Roddy and it’s time for a fight at Wrestlemania. Not a match mind you, but they’re going to be fighting in a back lot.

Roddy Piper vs. Goldust

This is a Hollywood Back Lot Brawl and Piper is waiting, baseball bat in hand. Goldust drives up in a gold Cadillac, which Piper attacks with a fire hose and then the more logical bat. Piper goes after Goldust with the bat and the camera is jumping all over the place. They break up a concessions table and Piper beats him all over the lot, including some HARD right hands that sounded like they were making some very real impact.

Goldust gets slammed onto the hood of the car and seems to be bleeding from somewhere. A low blow slows Piper down and Goldust runs him over, causing Piper (or more likely a stunt man) to hang on as Goldust drives through the lot. Piper finally falls off and steals a white Bronco to chase after Goldust. No rating due to time but we’re not done with this yet.

Savio Vega vs. Steve Austin

Vega is a Puerto Rican brawler and Austin is the Million Dollar Champion (not on the line here) with Ted DiBiase in his corner. These two had been fighting for a bit but it was made worse when they had to team together in the Tag Team Title tournament. Austin didn’t want to win and laid out Savio instead. We’re ready to go after Savio says he’s ready for anything.

They slug it out and the brawl is quickly on the floor where a DiBiase distraction doesn’t do Austin any good. Back in and Vega’s shoulder goes into the post as Austin takes over on his own. That’s a nice, subtle point and would come into play months later when Austin intentionally got DiBiase sent out of the company.

Austin tries to work on the arm but Savio takes over with some nice kicks. Oh wait though as Roddy Piper calls in to say he’s chasing Goldust down the freeway because this isn’t over. Vega flips out of a chinlock but the arm is still bothering him. Austin comes back with a middle rope elbow as Piper gets on the phone again but his phone keeps cutting off when he’s about to swear. This is a bad sitcom plot.

A pinfall reversal sequence gets a few near falls each but we have an aerial shot of Piper…..which is the video from the OJ Simpson car chase. Back to the match (which shouldn’t have to happen more than once ever) and Austin dives into a raised boot to put both guys down. Savio wins a slugout but a spinwheel kick takes out the referee. The distraction lets DiBiase throw in the title belt goes upside Savio’s head twice, allowing Austin to put on the Million Dollar Dream until the referee wakes up to call the match at 10:03.

Rating: C. The match was entertaining while they actually focused on it but instead we had to sit through Piper calling in (likely from backstage) to advance this stupid idea that no one not named McMahon finds funny. These two feuded for several months and it was a very underrated pairing with both guys getting better as a result. Of course Austin would move on to a much bigger feud later in the year and never looked back, but this was really fun stuff like it lasted.

Austin won’t let the hold go for a long time after the match is over.

More Piper footage which is still from the OJ chase.

We recap Undertaker pulling Diesel through the mat last month at In Your House VI and then Diesel seeing himself in a coffin. Diesel says he’s dealing with Undertaker tonight and then Shawn is next. Yes Shawn and not the title. I guess even Diesel knew what was coming in the main event.

Another half second of Piper footage as the announcers make sure to not say where they’ve seen this before.

Hunter Hearst Helmsley vs. Ultimate Warrior

Helmsley has a new valet (like he did every week) named Sable. Warrior is making his return for the first time since 1992 and Lawler had been suggesting that he was 400lbs and bald. Of course he’s his normal (normalish I guess) self and Lawler looks like an idiot again. Helmsley (who is TINY by comparison to what he would become) attacks Warrior before the bell and hits the Pedigree thirty seconds in. Warrior is almost to his feet faster than Helmsley though and it’s time for the clotheslines and shoulders. The gorilla press and splash end Helmsley at 1:39, though I think he’ll be fine. Warrior would be gone again by July.

Merchandise ad.

The debuting Wildman Marc Mero (Johnny B. Badd from WCW) says he’s ready for the competition here in the WWF. Helmsley stumbles in and they get in a fight to set up Mero’s first feud.

In Your House VII ad.

Diesel vs. Undertaker

This is the first time Undertaker has had a really serious challenger at Wrestlemania in a few years and for once he feels like he’s in real danger. These two have cost each other title shots at the last two pay per views and now it’s time for them to go one on one in a marginal dream match. Diesel wins a slugout to start and crushes Undertaker with a running clothesline in the corner.

Undertaker misses his big elbow but sits right back up and they quickly on the floor. A quick ram into the steps looks to set up the tombstone back inside but Diesel slips off the back and kicks Undertaker in the face for two. They’re flying through this so far. Undertaker misses the jumping clothesline and crashes into the ropes, only to snap Diesel’s throat across the top. Diesel is right back though and throws Undertaker into the barricade before stopping to pose.

Back in and the side slam gets two, followed by Snake Eyes (actually called that by Vince, I believe for the only time ever) to keep Undertaker in trouble. In a rare sight, both guys connect with a big boot at the same time (that’s hard to do when you think about it). It’s Diesel up first and we hit the bearhug on Undertaker. Lawler: “YOU GOT HIM BAY-BAY!”

Undertaker suplexes his way out of it but Diesel is up again and scores with the Jackknife. He’d rather celebrate than cover though and Undertaker eventually sits up. That’s fine with Diesel as he hits a second Jackknife but still won’t cover, allowing Undertaker to get up and grab him by the throat. That earns Undertaker a belly to back suplex but he pops up for a bad looking chokeslam. Undertaker plants Diesel with the Tombstone for the pin at 16:37 to make it 5-0.

Rating: B. Diesel was on his way out for WCW but he was actually having better matches every month right before he left. This was by far the best Undertaker Wrestlemania match so far as they were beating the tar out of each other. It’s nice to see Undertaker actually in some trouble instead of just destroying people for a change and Diesel gave him a great challenge. This was much better than I was expecting and a great big man fight.

Ultimate Warrior is on America Online.

Goldust and Piper return in their cars and fight to the ring with Goldust getting the better of it. Another low blow has Piper in trouble and now it’s time for Goldust to strip him. Piper’s bad leg is wrapped around the post but it just seems to fire him up even more. Goldust goes to kiss him but punches Piper in the face instead. That’s fine with Piper as he crotches Goldust on top, only to have Goldust kiss him. Piper will have none of that and he hammers away before grabbing Goldust between the legs. Now it’s time for a spanking, followed by Piper stripping Goldust down to some S&M lingerie to finally end it.

Piper’s son Colt comes in to celebrate with him.

We look back at the history of Bret vs. Shawn with a focus on both of their (singles) history in the company. Shawn has been rising through the ranks and is looking to fulfill his boyhood dream. We also get a focus on their training style with Shawn learning under high flier Jose Lothario and Bret being taught submissions by his father Stu Hart. This worked very well and summed up the entire idea in about a minute and a half.

Shawn says everyone knows the story and now it’s time for the final chapter.

Bret says he just wants to wake up tomorrow morning with the title.

Gorilla Monsoon is introduced as the new President of the WWF.

WWF World Title: Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

Bret is defending and this is a sixty minute Iron Man match, meaning the most falls (pin, submission, countout, disqualification) in the time limit wins. Lothario comes out with no Shawn but he points to the top of the arena for Shawn’s famous zipline entrance into the crowd. That shot of him riding down into the arena was shown on a lot of highlight packages for a very long time. Hebner explains the rules in full, even down to how a countout works, and we’re ready to go.

Feeling out process to start as Shawn grabs some quick takedowns to frustrate Bret just a bit. Bret holds on to a headlock to slow things down as Vince tries to say there are no Bret or Shawn fans but only WWF fans. Lawler is all over him for sounding stupid as this headlock continues. In this case though it makes sense as both guys would want to conserve energy.

Shawn fights up into a top wristlock but Bret reverses into a front facelock. That goes nowhere so Shawn escapes into an armbar. They get to their feet and try to pick up the pace but it’s right back to the mat for more arm cranking on the champ. Bret takes him into the corner for some shots to the ribs but Shawn forearms him in the jaw and headscissors Bret to the floor.

We’re ten minute in and you might think that headscissors would start the second gear but instead it’s right back to the armbar from Shawn. Bret stops to yell at Lothario and the distraction lets Shawn crank on the arm all over again. The hold stays on so long that Vince and Jerry actually talk strategy and analyze the match. Back up and Michaels gets caught in a spinebuster but fights out of a Sharpshooter attempt. They head to the floor and Bret is sent into the timekeeper’s area where a superkick takes the timekeeper’s (who looked a lot like Tony Chimmel) head off.

Back in and Bret grabs a chinlock to slow things down all over again. Shawn FINALLY fights up and hits a hard clothesline but Bret nails one of his own and it’s right back to that chinlock. Another comeback from Shawn includes a dropkick and there’s another armbar. We’re twenty minutes in and this already isn’t boding well. Shawn pulls on the wrist with his foot in Bret’s face before switching to a regular armbar. Good thing too as the fans might have been interested in something different.

Back up and they get a bit more aggressive as Bret’s shoulder is sent into the post. A shoulder breaker and hammerlock slam (shades of the Andersons) have Bret in even more trouble but Shawn isn’t following up. There’s a cross armbreaker on the wrong arm so Shawn quickly switches to the proper version. Shawn switches up to a seated armbar for a good bit until Bret fights up with a Stun Gun for the break. The arm keeps giving him problems though and Shawn sends Bret face first into the buckle. Bret isn’t done yet though as he comes back with the Five Moves of Doom.

For some reason he goes to the top rope and Shawn is ready to catch him, but Bret puts his knee on the back of Shawn’s head and drives him down onto the mat. Shawn comes back with a powerslam for two as there are thirty minutes to go. A slam brings Bret off the top again and a hurricanrana lets Shawn hammer away. That’s one of the first lucha style moves Shawn has used after basically promising to use a bunch of them. Nice little head game there and not something you often see work on Bret.

The threat of Sweet Chin Music sends Bret to the floor but Michaels goes to the top and LAUNCHES himself down onto Bret. That was one heck of a dive and always impresses me whenever I see this match. Back in and a PerfectPlex gets two on the champ. We hit a sleeper, which is smart but annoying after everything we’ve sat through here. Bret fights up (the arm injury disappeared a long time ago) and backdrops Shawn WAY over the top for a huge crash. Lothario comes over to check on him but somehow it’s not a countout.

Back in and Bret works on the back with an ax handle and backbreaker. There are twenty minutes left and Bret drops him with a belly to back superplex. We hit the reverse chinlock for a bit until Shawn fights up, only to have Bret throw him to the floor and into Lothario. With fifteen minutes to go, Bret even screams at Jose as he tries to get up and belly to bellys Shawn down for two. That’s rather heelish of him. The yelling, not the suplex.

Shawn’s right hands don’t get him anywhere as Bret counters a rollup by kicking Michaels outside again. This time it’s Bret diving through the ropes to take Shawn down again. Bret is willing to take the countout now but then changes his mind and breaks it up. Lawler: “He’s his own worst enemy! No, not as long as I’m still alive.” Back in and a German suplex gets two for the champ and Shawn can barely stand. He’s still able to slug it out from his knees though, telling Bret to bring it on.

A big headbutt puts Shawn down but Bret can’t follow up. After a few shakes of his head, Bret grabs another reverse chinlock and we have ten minutes to go. Shawn fights up yet again but it’s a double clothesline to reset things all over again. There’s a superplex from Bret as Vince declares it over at the six minute mark. He’s wrong on both counts as not only does it not get a fall but there were nearly seven minutes left.

Shawn kicks Bret in the face to block a Sharpshooter so Hart has to settle for a half crab instead. Unfortunately Shawn is right next to the ropes for the save and we’ve got five minutes left. Bret dives into a boot and both guys are down again. Shawn comes back with a nice dropkick to send Bret into the corner and there’s the Irish whip for Bret’s chest first buckle bump. Four minutes left and Shawn forearms into the nipup (which the camera misses) as it’s time for a comeback. Lawler: “Michaels has just gotten his nineteenth wind!”

With three minutes left, Shawn gets two off a top rope ax handle. The top rope elbow gets the same and Shawn plants him with a gutwrench powerbomb. He goes up with two minutes left and a moonsault press gets another near fall. A middle rope hurricanrana gets the same and Shawn is winded. With a minute left, Shawn goes up top but misses a dropkick and gets caught in the Sharpshooter. Bret cranks back on it but the time limit expires at 1:00:00.

We’re not done yet though as Bret goes to leave, only to have Monsoon make a ruling that we’re getting sudden death because THERE MUST BE A WINNER. Bret is ticked and starts hammering away on the back but Shawn jumps over him in the corner and hits Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere. Everyone (including me when I was watching live) jumps to their feet but Shawn can’t follow up. Both guys stagger to their feet and another superkick gives Shawn the first fall and the title at 1:01:50.

Rating: B-. This is a really tricky one to grade but the first twenty minutes ruin whatever else they could have had here. It’s just a bunch of laying around in rest holds, which may make sense but that doesn’t mean it’s entertaining. This would have been much better off as a regular match running about forty minutes as it increases drama and lets you believe that something might happen at any given moment.

The match is fondly remembered and it’s certainly not bad, but it’s definitely nowhere near a classic. Allegedly neither guy wanted to job multiple times to the other and it caused the match to be a bunch of waiting around for the first and decisive fall, which made for a dull match until the last five minutes. Unfortunately that’s the case with almost all Iron Man matches and it certainly happened here too. Good match, but not as great as it’s hyped up to be.

Bret is all ticked off and leaves, not to be seen for over seven months. Vince gets in the great line of “the boyhood dream has come true for Shawn Michaels.” Shawn is stunned but finally celebrates like you knew he was going to do.

A highlight package takes us out.

Overall Rating: B. This was a one match show but the Diesel vs. Undertaker match was more than enough to help push it up to a higher level. This was still a bad time for the company but they were smart enough to go with a new direction. Shawn’s success as champion would be hit or miss on his best day but there was no question that this was the right move at the time. It’s not a great show, but when nearly half of it is spent on an entertaining enough match, the show is a success.

Ratings Comparison

Camp Cornette vs. Yokozuna/Jake Roberts/Ahmed Johnson

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: C-

Steve Austin vs. Savio Vega

Original: B-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: C

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Undertaker vs. Diesel

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: B

Roddy Piper vs. Goldust

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Shawn Michaels vs. Bret Hart

Original: B

2013 Redo: B

2015 Redo: B

Overall Rating

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: B-

I’m kind of stunned that the Iron Man has stayed consistent.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/19/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-12-one-really-long-match-and-not-much-else/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/21/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-xii-grabbing-the-brass-ring/

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: March 4, 2022
Location: FTX Arena, Miami, Florida
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We are less than a month away from Wrestlemania and the card is starting to come together. There are still some gaps that need to be filled in but now tonight we might have a better idea of how some of the title scene will look. This week features two title matches which could see some shakeups. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Paul Heyman talks about being the advocate for Roman Reigns, who will be here tonight.

Ronda Rousey is ready for her first Smackdown match.

Sonya Deville is ready to teach Rousey about authority.

The Viking Raiders are ready to hunt the Usos, rip them apart, and take the Tag Team Titles.

The Usos say the Vikings are fat.

Ricochet says he’s taking the Intercontinental Title from Sami Zayn.

Sami Zayn lists off his monikers and says after tonight, people will be talking about him being the best Intercontinental Champion.

Intercontinental Title: Ricochet vs. Sami Zayn

Ricochet is challenging and grabs a very fast rollup for two to start. Sami hits a running clothesline to slow him down and then suplexes Ricochet down on the apron as we take a break. Back with Ricochet snapping off a middle rope hurricanrana for two but Sami grabs a sitout powerbomb (with Ricochet landing hard) for two. Ricochet sends him outside and hits a handspring moonsault to take Sami down again.

Back in and Ricochet gets crotched on top, sending him outside in a crash. Cue Johnny Knoxville because of course here he is again, with Sami being distracted by the INTERCONTINENTAL CHUMP shirt. It’s enough of a distraction that Ricochet can grab a standing hurricanrana for the pin and the title at 7:35.

Rating: C+. Well ok then. I would not have have bet on that one but they had a surprise here with the title change. That is the kind of thing that they have been needing to do for Ricochet for a long time and if it means he gets a Wrestlemania title defense out of it, good for him. I know Knoxville vs. Zayn is coming, probably at Wrestlemania, but you can do that without the title just as well. I was surprised in a good way here so well done.

We look at Vince McMahon on the Pat McAfee Show, where he announced that he will be inducting the Undertaker into the Hall of Fame. He also offered McAfee a Wrestlemania match, which McAfee accepted.

Sami Zayn is losing his mind over Johnny Knoxville following him everywhere from Smackdown to social media. How about Knoxville follows him to Wrestlemania?

Cole asks McAfee who he will be facing at Wrestlemania but here is Austin Theory to interrupt. Theory introduces himself to the crowd and asks McAfee why Mr. McMahon was on his show. He finds it funny that McAfee thinks McMahon likes him (which makes McAfee laugh). Will McAfee be so happy when his jaw is wired shut?

Theory gets in his face and then slaps him, with Theory saying they’re facing off at Wrestlemania. Theory leaves and McAfee stands on the announcers’ table, telling him to come back here. With Theory gone, McAfee goes on a rant about how he was embarrassed in front of Miami and blames Michael Cole for what happened.

Naomi vs. Carmella

Sasha Banks and Queen Zelina are here too. Carmella gets her mask put on but Naomi wastes no time in kicking her in the face. Carmella is still fine enough to pull her off the top and into a chinlock, which Naomi breaks up in a hurry. Banks cuts off Zelina’s interference and it’s the split legged moonsault to give Naomi the pin at 2:07.

Happy Corbin beats Madcap Moss and some others at poker while bragging about his Wrestlemania success. That will keep going at Wrestlemania, when he beats Drew McIntyre. Moss gives us a McIntyre impression with his usual level of humor.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura have another Toyota Tundra commercial, this time hiking through the woods.

Drew McIntyre vs. Jinder Mahal

Shanky is here with Mahal. McIntyre gets knocked down for an early neck crank as McAfee continues to go after Cole for possibly having something to do with Theory earlier. That’s broken up and McIntyre starts hammering away until a Shanky distraction cuts him off. McIntyre takes care of him, setting up the Glasgow Kiss into the Claymore to finish Mahal at 2:04.

Post match McIntyre says he doesn’t care what Madcap Moss and Happy Corbin do. McIntyre asks for a show of hands of how many people want to gouge their eyes out when Corbin is on TV. The fans go up, including Kayla Braxton’s. McIntyre is taking Corbin out at Wrestlemania.

Back at the poker game, Corbin doesn’t like Moss’ jokes.

McAfee is very happy that Ronda Rousey is wrestling tonight.

We look back at last week’s contract signing between Roman Reigns and Brock Lesnar.

Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are coming to the ring but the Usos jump them from behind and lay them out. Cue Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman so the Bloodline can go to the ring for a chat. Miami seems very happy to see and acknowledge Reigns, who talks about how he and Brock Lesnar are defending their titles at Madison Square Garden. You already know he is going to smash someone and send them to the back of the line like he has done for a year and a half.

Then you have Lesnar, and not all of us want to see him with that title, or even at Wrestlemania. Reigns wants him to be champion at Wrestlemania though, because he wants Lesnar to hand over the title. Heyman talks about spoilers, so maybe we should give Miami a spoiler. Reigns calls his shot like Babe Ruth and he delivers every single time. The spoiler is that at Wrestlemania, he is pinning Brock Lesnar and Lesnar will acknowledge him. Reigns seemed to snap a bit with that one and Cole thinks Lesnar is in his head.

Tag Team Titles: Usos vs. Viking Raiders

The Raiders are challenging and the Usos are sent outside to start. Ivar dives off the apron to take both of them down, setting up the top rope splash for two on Jimmy in a very near fall. Jey breaks up the Viking Experience and the champs drop the Vikings out to the floor. Ivar gets posted and Erik gets tossed down hard as we take a break. Back with Jimmy’s Superfly Splash hitting Erik’s raised knees and the Viking Experience connects, with Jey making another save. Some superkicks get two on Erik but he reverses into a cradle for the same. The 1D connects to retain the Usos’ titles at 8:20.

Rating: B-. This was almost all action but what mattered the most was I bought into the near falls. There were multiple times where I thought the titles were going to change hands and that is proof they are doing something right. I’m going to assume that Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura are up next for the Usos and that could make for an interesting match, especially since it isn’t like there are any other fresh challengers for the titles.

Earlier today, New Day rode around backstage on Big E.’s ATV.

Sheamus vs. Big E.

Ridge Holland and Kofi Kingston are here too, with Kofi getting on the ATV before the bell. Holland chairs him from behind and then chairs the ATV. Sheamus chop blocks Big E. and he and Holland steal the ATV. No match.

During the break, Sheamus and Holland destroyed the ATV.

We look back at Ricochet winning the Intercontinental Title.

Johnny Knoxville accepts Sami Zayn’s Wrestlemania challenge.

Happy Corbin and Madcap Moss are playing darts when Drew McIntyre stabs the board with his sword to run them off.

We look back at Ronda Rousey’s interview last week, with Charlotte and Sonya Deville interrupting to take her out.

Ronda Rousey vs. Sonya Deville

Charlotte comes out to watch and the distraction lets Deville go after Rousey’s bad knee. The chinlock goes on as Charlotte sits in on commentary. Rousey fights up and chokes away in the ropes, setting up Piper’s Pit. The armbar finishes Deville at 3:12.

Rating: C-. That’s all it needed to be with Rousey shrugging off whatever Deville had and then beating her with the armbar as expected. Rousey needed to look dominant like this as she should be ready for Wrestlemania and the showdown with Charlotte. The good thing is that someone like Rousey doesn’t need much reheating and she is all but ready for the title match from here.

Post match Rousey calls Charlotte into the ring and actually gets what she wants, setting up an ankle lock (playing off Charlotte talking about Rousey being a one trick pony with the armbar) to make Charlotte tap to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This is a show that is going to get some mixed reviews because there wasn’t much in the way of wrestling, but they did take some steps towards Wrestlemania. Two more matches have been set and that is something that WWE has been needing to do for several weeks now. The Tag Team Title match was good and I liked the title change so the show did cover some important points outside of just Wrestlemania. Pretty good show, as it did some things that needed to be done.

Results
Ricochet b. Sami Zayn – Hurricanrana
Naomi b. Carmella – Split legged moonsault
Drew McIntyre b. Jinder Mahal – Claymore
Usos b. Viking Raiders – 1D to Erik
Ronda Rousey b. Sonya Deville – Armbar

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

Monday Night Raw
Date: October 1, 2007
Location: Quicken Loans Arena, Cleveland, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for No Mercy and the show is mostly together. The big story continues to be John Cena vs. Randy Orton for the WWE Title, but we also seem to have the issues between Vince McMahon and HHH. The latter of those feuds comes to a head tonight as the two of them are facing off. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is Vince McMahon to get things going, with three not so high level looking wrestlers in the ring with him. Vince hypes up his main event with HHH and promises to win. We see a clip of Vince beating up HHH in various ways before Vince turns his attention to the three guys in the ring. Each one represents a different fighting style, starting with a four time All American amateur wrestler, followed by a fifth degree kempo karate black belt and finally, the Ohio sumo champion (no one seems convinced).

Vince offers to face all of them, only to have someone else do it as a preview for what is going to happen to HHH at No Mercy. Cue the returning Umaga to destroy all three of them, with Vince looking rather pleased. Umaga beats them up even more for a bonus and Vince’s happiness rises.

Jeff Hardy/Brian Kendrick/Paul London vs. Shelton Benjamin/Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch

London hurricanranas Murdoch down to start and hands it off to Kendrick. That means a gutbuster from Cade to take over, with Murdoch coming back in for a splash. A dropkick gets Kendrick out of trouble though and it’s Hardy coming in to pick up the pace. Everything breaks down and the Whisper in the Wind hits Cade but Hardy gets crotched on top. London hits a very out of nowhere dive and throws Murdoch back inside for Sliced Bread from Kendrick. Hardy drops the Swanton for the pin on Cade.

Rating: C+. It was a short match but they packed a lot into there, which is more than I would have expected. Hardy, London and Kendrick seem like three guys who would work well together as the high flying trio while the other three…well they’re feuding with the good guys so it makes sense to have them here. I’m not sure how much more you can get out of Benjamin vs. Hardy though, as Hardy needs some fresh competition.

Vince McMahon comes in to see William Regal and welcomes him back before praising Regal for making Mr. Kennedy vs. John Cena for tonight’s main event. He also asks Regal for a personal favor: take care of Hornswoggle tonight. Regal reluctantly agrees as Hornswoggle pops up. Vince leaves….and Regal has already lost Hornswoggle.

Randy Orton joins us via satellite and we see him Punting John Cena’s father a few weeks ago and then hitting him with an RKO two weeks ago. Orton promises to leave Cena laying the same way at No Mercy.

Some Cleveland Indians are here. That was a good year for the team so we’ll call that an upgrade.

The Diva Search girls ran an obstacle course on the beach.

William Regal goes looking for Hornswoggle and runs into the Highlanders. They haven’t seen Hornswoggle, but Regal wants to know why they turned down a match with Paul London and Brian Kendrick. Rory explains that it’s because they only want a Tag Team Title shot, which leaves Regal continuing his Hornswoggle search.

Hardcore Holly vs. Cody Rhodes

Rematch from last week when the returning Holly beat Rhodes without much trouble. Rhodes starts fast but gets shouldered down. Back up and Rhodes grabs an armbar but gets dropkicked for two. A small package gives Rhodes two so he tries to jump over Holly in the corner, earning himself an Alabama Slam for the fast pin.

Here is Beth Phoenix for a chat and she would like Lilian Garcia to stay in the ring with her. Beth promises to win the Women’s Title on Sunday and wants Lilian to practice announcing her as the winner tonight. Lilian does, but throws in a caveat about how Phoenix has to actually win on Sunday. Phoenix literally goes for her throat but Candice Michelle runs in for the save.

SAVE_US video, now with some fresh codes, including things such as “Tron image”, “GRAND_SLAM” and “8.2.11/SAVIOR_SELF”, the latter of which is featured several times.

Vince McMahon vs. HHH

Before the match, Vince shows us a clip of HHH attacking Umaga with a chair and the sledgehammer last week to send him into a steroid suspension. HHH comes out but Vince cuts off his entrance pre-corner pose and says let’s go. Hold on though as there is no referee, so here is Carlito to be the guest referee.

Carlito does the weapons check, allowing Vince to slap HHH in the face. The bell rings and Vince immediately hides in the ropes, with Carlito covering him up. Vince bails to the floor so the chase is on, with HHH finally going around the other side to catch Vince on the floor. The Pedigree is broken up with a Backstabber so HHH hits Carlito low, which is enough for the DQ.

Post match HHH stays on Vince but here is Umaga for the fight. HHH hits a DDT, which has the expected results. A superkick sends HHH into the corner and there’s the running hip attack. Umaga stops to yell at Carlito so HHH pulls out the sledgehammer to scare Umaga off.

And now Marella At The Movies, featuring Santino Marella and Maria, though she doesn’t seem thrilled to be here. This week they are going to review The Condemned, which Maria thought was fun. Marella says it was fun if you like having your head bashed in with a mallet. He should have been the star, meaning it’s time for a clip with Santino included.

Cue Val Venis to interrupt (this seems to get Maria’s attention), but Santino doesn’t think much of Venis’ acting. He couldn’t believe what Venis did to that donkey in the Shrek based film. Venis offers Maria a spot in his next movie and the beatdown is on with Venis’ leg getting destroyed. I continue to be astounded that Venis is still employed.

John Cena doesn’t think much of the idea that THEY are saying he is going to lose to Randy Orton. It is time to talk about THEY, who know that Cena is losing and that he has changed and that Todd Grisham has naked pictures of Umaga on his phone. At No Mercy, Orton can hit him with everything from a bell to a microphone to a snow cone to a student loan but Cena will keep getting up every time. You put anyone in front of him and he will always get up and never quit, so let them talk. He’s going to beat Orton so bad that THEY are never going to forget it.

Melina vs. Mickie James

Melina wins a battle over the lockup to start and they go to the mat with Melina kicking away. Mickie fights up and hits some hard forearms but Melina kicks her in the head for two. The screaming reverse DDT is loaded up but Hornswoggle pops up from under the ring for a distraction. The freaked out Melina gets rolled up for the pin.

Post match Hornswoggle chases Melina underneath the ring and comes out with Melina’s clothes. Hornswoggle runs off, leaving Melina screaming. This was bad back then and it doesn’t hold up well here.

Post break, William Regal yells at Hornswoggle over what happened but Steve-O (from Jackass, and starring in a new upcoming USA series), comes in. Steve-O is here to find a wuss (point of his show), and the distraction lets Hornswoggle leave.

No Mercy rundown.

Steve-O comes in to see Ron Simmons, suggesting that he can make Simmons be less of a wuss. Simmons literally throws him out and hits the catchphrase.

John Cena vs. Mr. Kennedy

Non-title. Before the match, Kennedy talks about how he is going to make a statement by beating Cena. Kennedy grabs a headlock to start and then shoulders him down but Cena is back up with a hiptoss. The armbar goes on but Kennedy gets up, only to get driven into the corner. Kennedy fights out of the corner and punches Cena down before taking him outside for a whip into the steps. We take a break and come back with Kennedy grabbing a chinlock to keep Cena in trouble. Cena fights up and grabs a suplex, setting p the STFU for the very fast tap.

Rating: C. The ending was very quick and there is a reason for that. Cena tore his pectoral muscle when he gave Kennedy the hiptoss, making this a one on one match. There is only so much that can be done when you’re wrestling with one arm and while Cena did what he could, the match wasn’t very good as a result. Kennedy carried it as well as he could, even with the very sudden finish.

Post match Randy Orton runs in, apparently guilty of satellite fraud, and lays out Cena. The steps to the face set up an RKO onto the announcers’ table, with Orton counting to ten as Cena is out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This show was the big final push towards no Mercy and it only went so well. The biggest problem is that Orton vs. Cena has been set up for several weeks now and there is only so much that they can get out of one more week of building. The HHH vs. Umaga match had to get a last second build and that worked fine, as the match was already set up a month ago. The rest of the show was only ok, though the Cena situation is going to cause some problems.

 

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

A look at why the WWE women’s division is not as bad as it seems.

 

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-not-fault/

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 28, 2022
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jimmy Smith Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We are just over a month away from Wrestlemania and it would be nice to have the show actually get some more matches announced. There are only a handful of things set for the card and WWE is running out of shows to build them up. Maybe they can put some of them together tonight, as they kind of need to. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence. Since when does this show have an opening sequence?

Here is Kevin Owens, in a sideways cowboy hat, to open with the Kevin Owens Show. He brings out his best friend and his tag team partner, Seth Rollins, to talk about how they’re going to win the Raw Tag Team Titles next week. Owens talks about how he can’t stand Texas but they have to find a way to get to Wrestlemania. Therefore they are going to win the titles next week and defend them at Wrestlemania, which will take place in that stupid Texas.

Owens stomps on the hat but for now, we need to bring out this week’s guests: the Raw Tag Team Champions, Alpha Academy. After assuring them that Otis’ chair is reinforced, Owens and Rollins promise to take the titles next week. Gable brags about his education and, after complaining about how they only have a 33.3% change of retaining the titles, starts shooshing both of them (just like their new SHOOOSH shirts suggest). This sets up a SHOOSH off between Gable and Owens until a Stunner leaves Gable laying and we take a break.

Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens vs. Alpha Academy

Non-title with Gable still down and we’re joined in progress with Otis elbowing Owens in the face. Gable gets on the apron as Rollins comes in to take Otis into the corner, only to be sent to the apron. A Gable distraction lets Otis knock Rollins off the apron and some whip send Rollins into the barricade.

Back in and Otis hits a suplex to drop Rollins but a missed shot allows the tag back to Owens. Everything breaks down and Owens hits a splash off the apron on Rollins, only to get run over by Otis as we take a break. We come back with Gable working on Owens’ knee before rolling some German suplexes. An enziguri rocks Gable though and it’s Rollins coming back in to pick up the pace.

A Sling Blade hits Gable and a Downward Spiral into the middle buckle makes it worse. There’s the Falcon Arrow for two more and Rollins nods after the kickout. It’s back to Owens for the fisherman’s buster onto the knee but Otis breaks it up. Otis’ Vader Bomb sets up a moonsault from Gable with Rollins making the save. Rollins dives onto Otis to take him out and dives back in for a pop up Buckle Bomb. A Stunner sets up a Stomp to give Rollins the pin on Gable at 12:41.

Rating: C+. This picked way up near the end and is a great way to give Owens and Rollins some momentum going into next week’s title match. I’m not sure I can imagine the titles changing hands as Owens would seem to have bigger plans so they can get the title match out of the way and move on. For now though, this was a good way to set things up, as I’m having trouble getting annoyed at champions losing anymore.

Video on Omos.

Omos says he has dominated everyone since he debuted last year at Wrestlemania and he’ll do it again here.

Omos vs. T-Bar

Omos jumps him before the bell and knocks him off the apron for a crash. T-Bar is mostly out of it so Omos throws him into the corner, where T-Bar says he can go. Omos misses a charge into the corner but is fine enough to knock T-bar sillier with a clothesline. The chokebomb finishes T-Bar at 42 seconds.

We look back at Becky Lynch and Bianca Belair yelling at each other last week, setting up Belair beating Doudrop.

Nikki Ash and Doudrop are ready to be the hero/villain in their six woman tag this week. Becky Lynch comes in to say she’s ready to win, like she did over Belair at Summerslam in 26 seconds.

Rhea Ripley/Liv Morgan/Bianca Belair have an unnatural conversation in the back about strategy for their six woman tag.

Bianca Belair/Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley vs. Doudrop/Becky Lynch/Nikki Ash

Becky and Liv start but since Belair comes in, Becky hands it off to Nikki. That means it’s back to Liv, who actually locks up with Nikki and takes her down with a running hurricanrana. Everything breaks down early and the villains are sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with Becky rolling Belair up for two and sending her to the apron for a springboard kick to the face.

Becky uses the hair to pull Belair into the post and then ties it around the top rope. With that untied, Doudrop comes in to drop an elbow but Nikki misses a shot, allowing the hot tag back to Rhea. Becky gets faceplanted for two with Doudrop hitting a splash for the save. Everything breaks down and Nikki drags the crushed Becky back to the corner for the tag. Belair comes in as well as everything breaks down, with Liv hitting a dive to the floor.

Nikki high crossbodies Rhea but Belair is back in with a spinebuster. Becky grabs the braid to break that up but Belair WHIPS THE FIRE OUT OF HER with the braid, complete with some crazy cracking sounds (which are probably sound effects but dang those whips looked painful). Becky runs off while holding her ribs, leaving Belair to KOD Nikki for the pin at 12:11.

Rating: C+. This was a bit better than I expected and that is where things get more interesting. The interviews before the match were horrible and made me wonder how in the world they could screw these people up. No one talks like that and it made me want to turn off the show. Then you get to the match, where the women get to showcase their talent and the match is that much better. It’s amazing to see just how much of a gap there is between the in and out of the ring portions because the talent is absolutely there.

We look at Robert Roode costing Tommaso Ciampa the #1 contendership to the NXT Title.

Tommaso Ciampa vs. Robert Roode

Dolph Ziggler is here with Roode. Ciampa’s No One Will Survive theme has been replaced with a generic rock song, which shouldn’t be that surprising. Ciampa starts fast but misses a running knee to Roode, who counters the Fairy Tale Ending and rolls him up for two. Another running knee connects to knock Ziggler off the apron and a rollup finishes Roode at 2:40.

Post match Roode and Ziggler beat Ciampa down, with Ziggler promising to take out Ciampa and Bron Breakker tomorrow on NXT.

We look at Dana Brooke losing and regaining the 24/7 Title.

Dana Brooke/Reggie vs. Akira Tozawa/Tamina

The women start with Tamina being sent into the corner for the handspring elbow. Reggie comes in to roll Tozawa up for two and a dropkick gets the same with Tamina making the save. Everything breaks down and Reggie’s running flipping seated senton finishes Tozawa at 1:44.

Post match Brooke kisses Reggie to the mat and Reggie seems pleased. Tozawa puckers up for Tamina, who kisses him as well. Tozawa looks like he is in a trance.

The Street Profits are ready to take out RKBro tonight. They throw in some mocking of the rest of the tag division for a bonus.

Mysterios vs. Hurt Business

Before the match, the Mysterios promise to take out Miz and Logan Paul at Wrestlemania but tonight they’re focused on the Hurt Business. Cue the Miz to list off his WWE accomplishments before bragging about how great Logan Paul really is. They’re big global stars and they are AWESOME, certainly better than the Mysterios.

We take a break and come back joined in progress with Benjamin sending Rey tot he apron for a Downward Spiral from Alexander. Back in and Rey fights out of the corner before hurricanranaing Alexander into the same corner. The diving tag brings in Dominik, who comes in off the top with a high crossbody to Shelton. A suplex drops Dominik but he’s back with a tornado DDT, bringing Alexander back in for the save. Dominik sends Shelton outside but his suicide dive is countered. That earns Benjamin a posting but Miz pops up to grab Dominik. Rey chases Miz off, leaving Dominik to get rolled up for the pin at 4:30.

Rating: C-. They have got to find something new for Dominik because this stuff is just so dull. He is completely fine in the ring but he is about as interesting as watching a sidewalk dry. Miz’s interference was a fine way to go, but come up with something better for Dominik, which means getting him out of this team as soon as possible.

Riddle is coloring to stay focused when Randy Orton comes in to say they’re going to go win tonight. Then next week, they’re getting their Tag Team Titles back.

Carmella and Queen Zelina are in the back, with Carmella saying she and Corey Graves are going to put on a show after she and Zelina retain the Women’s Tag Team Titles at Wrestlemania.

RKBro vs. Street Profits

Riddle pulls Ford into an early triangle choke, which is enough to set up the Orton circle stomp, much to the fans’ approval. Dawkins comes in and is sent outside for a springboard Floating Bro from Riddle, who is taken down by Ford’s big flip dive as we take a break. Back with Riddle fighting out of trouble and bringing Orton back in for the hanging DDT to Ford.

Everything breaks down and Dawkins knocks Riddle to the floor, leaving Orton to have the RKO blocked. Ford enziguris Orton and hits the frog splash…..for the pin at 6:40, as Orton seemed like he couldn’t get the foot on the ropes. That really didn’t seem to be the planned finish, which was either Orton being out of position or hurt, as the referee and Riddle immediately checked on him and then talked to the Profits.

Rating: C. That ending did not look good as the splash looked to mess Orton up badly. I can’t imagine that was the planned finish as RKBro has a title match coming up next week and then gets beaten here in what should have been a tuneup. Hopefully Orton is ok, because he looked very out of it after the match.

Veer Mahaan is still coming.

Smackdown Breakdown.

Austin Theory is in Vince McMahon’s office and talks about Vince’s appearance on the Pat McAfee Show. Theory lists off McAfee’s accomplishments, which don’t seem to impress Vince. It will be Vince’s first sitdown interview in twenty years, but Theory thinks McAfee might jump him. Vince says it’s not that kind of a show and leaves. Theory picks up Vince’s pencil and says it could be.

US Title: Finn Balor vs. Damian Priest

Balor is challenging and we have had two breaks, the Smackdown Breakdown and the Vince/Theory segment since his entrance. Priest elbows Balor in the face to start and grabs a reverse chinlock. We hit the chinlock to keep Balor down for a bit, only to have him fight up and send Priest outside. The big flip dive drops Priest and we take a break.

Back with Balor scoring with the Pele to put Priest on his knee, setting up the double stomp. The shotgun dropkick sets up a missed Coup de Grace, allowing Priest to clothesline him down. Priest’s spinning kick to the head sets up the South of Heaven chokeslam for two. The Reckoning is loaded up but Balor slips out and this another shotgun dropkick. Now the Coup de Grace can connect for the pin and the title at 10:36.

Rating: C+. I can live with this one as Balor has needed something to do for a long time now. At the same time, Priest has gotten a good bit out of the title, though he has sputtered a bit in recent months. It was time for the change, though I’m almost scared to see what is next for Priest now that he has lost the title.

Post match Priest says the people carried Balor to winning the US Title. They never gave him that reaction during his title reign, so Priest is going to win that title back and all that motivation isn’t going to mean a thing. Priest clothesline him down and hits a Razor’s Edge onto (not through) the announcers’ table. There’s your heel turn, on a roster with a lot of heels.

We look back at Edge’s Wrestlemania challenge.

Here is Edge to get an answer to his challenge. Edge wants someone to come out and accept so here is….AJ Styles, much to Edge’s delight. Styles gets in the ring and says he accepts, with Edge talking about how both of them have wanted this match for a long time. Edge wants the bulldog AJ and not the one who has been Omos’ tag team b**** for the last few years.

Styles doesn’t like that and the fight is on, with the Phenomenal Forearm missing. Instead Edge kicks him low and gives that heel face of his. Edge hammers away and goes to leave but stops and comes back. The Conchairto crushes AJ’s head and Edge looks like he’s about to cry…before hitting another one to end the show. Yeah the Conchairto is a cliché, but this feels like a Wrestlemania match and that is a nice thing to see.

Overall Rating: C. The last hour saved this show as stuff actually happened for a change. As tends to be the case, the biggest problem around here is the long stretch where very little interesting happens and it feels like WWE is throwing stuff out there to fill in parts of the three hours.

There is some interesting/quality stuff here, such as the title change and Edge’s heel turn, but there is such a dry spell in the middle that the good parts (also including the opener and the six woman tag) are drowned out so badly. The last forty five or so minutes were a boost and I’m almost scared to think about how bad it would be without them. Oh and we are now back to the “how does X have a path to Wrestlemania” stuff, which is just as stupid now as it has been every other single time.

Results
Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins b. Alpha Academy – Stomp to Gable
Omos b. T-Bar – Chokebomb
Bianca Belair/Liv Morgan/Rhea Ripley b. Nikki Ash/Becky Lynch/Doudrop – KOD to Ash
Tommaso Ciampa b. Robert Roode – Rollup
Dana Brooke/Reggie b. Tamina/Akira Tozawa – Running flipping seated senton to Tozawa
Hurt Business b. Mysterios – Rollup to Dominik
Street Profits b. RKBro – Frog splash to Orton
Finn Balor b. Damian Priest – Coup de Grace

 

 

 

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Wrestlemania IV
Date: March 27, 1988
Location: Trump Plaza, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 18,165
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

DiBiase’s master plan isn’t over yet and we’ll be seeing it put into effect as the night goes on. However, the tournament plans have been drastically changed since they were originally put together. We’ll take a look at what was changed and why as we move on but you should be able to figure most of it out already. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a bit more modern this year as it’s a slot machine spitting out coins followed by the Wrestlemania IV logo. It’s very fitting in Atlantic City and a nice change of pace from the basic yet effective openings of the previous shows.

The roof has these really cool blue and red stripes as their main design. I always thought those looked awesome.

Gene brings out Gladys Knight to sing America the Beautiful. I’m not entirely sure why she’s covered in patches and looks like she has about a dozen sponsors but I’ve seen stranger things.

Bob Uecker is here again and is doing commentary on the first match. He’s probably the best celebrity commentator they’ve ever had so I have no issue with this.

Battle Royal

Bret Hart, Jim Neidhart, Jim Powers, Paul Roma, Sika, Danny Davis, B. Brian Blair, Jim Brunzell, Bad News Brown, Sam Houston, Jacques Rougeau, Raymond Rougeau, Ken Patera, Ron Bass, Junkyard Dog, Nikolai Volkoff, Boris Zhukov, Hillbilly Jim, King Harley Race, George Steele

The winner gets a big trophy and you really should be able to see where this is going from here. Powers and Roma (the Young Stallions) are another pretty boy tag team, Sika is a Samoan, Brown is a tough guy and a legitimate bronze medalist in judo (never mentioned on screen), Houston is a cowboy, Patera is a strongman, Bass is an evil cowboy and Volkoff and Zhukov (the Bolsheviks) are evil Russians. Steele starts on the floor and never actually gets in so it’s not really clear if he’s eliminated or not.

Uecker is on commentary for this one and mentions that Vince McMahon called to ask if he wanted to be on the show. That’s not something you would expect to hear as Vince was just a commentator at this point. Houston, a smaller guy, is quickly put out and Sika, a much bigger guy, is gone soon after.

The fans go nuts at the prospect of Davis getting tossed. It’s rather impressive that he’s hung around so long with such a simple gimmick and so little skill. Steele pulls Neidhart to the floor and both Bees and Raymond Rougeau are quickly eliminated as well. Some cops walk in front of the first row as Dog eliminates Bass. Zhukov and others dump Hillbilly and Powers tosses Davis to the biggest pop of his career. Powers is eliminated a few seconds later and the ring is really clearing out.

Race and Dog go at it again and there go Nikolai and Patera. Jacques is eliminated a few seconds alter and we’re down to Hart, Roma, Race, Dog and Brown. Dog punches Race out almost immediately and Brown backdrops Roma to get us down to three. Brown hits Hart by mistake and the all fours headbutts have them in trouble. The villains take over with some double teaming and quickly toss the Dog. An agreement seems to have been reached but Brown gives him the Ghetto Blaster (enziguri) and tosses Hart for the win at 9:45.

Rating: D. This was a rather lame battle royal with almost no drama but it did accomplish a major goal by turning Bret face for the first time in his career. Neidhart would follow him to the good side soon enough and the Hart Foundation would become a force in the division all over again. Brown would soon feud with the new World Champion for a bit in some really good matches. I wouldn’t want to spoil the new champion for you though, in case you somehow haven’t heard about it in the last twenty seven years or so.

Brown comes back in for the trophy presentation but Bret jumps him from behind and destroys the trophy.

The Fink goes over the tournament rules but Gorilla and Jesse talk over him. They quiet down for a celebrity moment though as Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous’ Robin Leech reads a proclamation about the tournament, which basically says “we’re having a tournament.”

Here are the brackets:

Hulk Hogan

BYE

Andre the Giant

BYE

Jim Duggan

Ted DiBiase

Don Muraco

Dino Bravo

Greg Valentine

Ricky Steamboat

Randy Savage

Butch Reed

One Man Gang

Bam Bam Bigelow

Jake Roberts

Rick Rude

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Jim Duggan vs. Ted DiBiase

DiBiase has bodyguard Virgil and Andre with him. Ted hides in the corner to start but Duggan fires off some right hands to take over. A big atomic drop sends DiBiase over the top and out to the floor with one of DiBiase’s perfect bounces. He’s known as a technician but he can tumble around very well. Back in and Duggan pounds away in the corner but he charges into a boot to give Ted his first control.

A sunset flip gets two for Duggan and Jesse freaks out that he knows a wrestling move. Duggan pounds him into the corner again and a slam looks to set up the Three Point Clothesline but Andre grabs his foot. The distraction lets DiBiase get in a knee to the back for the pin at 5:02. The replay shows Andre punching Duggan as well with the referee looking right at him. It would seem that DiBiase has bought off another one. Or that they screwed up and no one noticed.

Rating: C-. This is going to be a running problem tonight. These matches could be good but you can’t do much when you have so little time to work with. Five minutes is enough for a squash but you need more if you want to see something competitive. Duggan and DiBiase had some awesome matches in Mid-South but they were far different people at this point.

Brutus Beefcake threatens to cut Honky Tonk Man’s hair tonight after he takes the Intercontinental Title. Honky Tonk stole the belt from Steamboat just a few months after Wrestlemania III and has held it ever since.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Don Muraco vs. Dino Bravo

Bravo has Frenchy Martin with him while Muraco, now a good guy, has former WWF World Champion Billy Graham in his corner. Power vs. power here with Bravo taking him into the corner for some big right hands. Muraco comes back with a slam but is totally out of position for what looked like a Vader Bomb, meaning he has to just land next to Bravo and then cover him. A gutwrench suplex gets two for Bravo but he misses a knee in the corner to give Muraco a target.

Don starts working on the leg but gets kicked away so hard that his neck gets tied up in the ropes. Bravo follows up on the neck with a piledriver (Muraco’s move, though Muraco uses a tombstone) for two, followed by a double clothesline to put both of them down. Muraco takes over so Bravo pulls the referee in the way of a flying forearm for the DQ at 4:54.

Rating: D. Lame match here with an even lamer ending. They really needed to protect Dino Bravo in a World Title tournament at Wrestlemania? You can’t have him take a rollup loss to a former Intercontinental Champion? The ending didn’t do it any favors either and the whole thing was just messy. It could have been worse though.

Uecker, who will mainly be a backstage interviewer tonight, is looking for Vanna White but finds Honky Tonk Man and Jimmy Hart instead. A few barbs are exchanged about Uecker’s abysmal batting average and Uecker thinks it might be time for some haircuts. Honky Tonk threatens to backstroke up the Mississippi. Wouldn’t that mess with his hair?

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Ricky Steamboat vs. Greg Valentine

Ricky has his son with him, who would wind up being Richie Steamboat in the early days of NXT. Steamboat runs the ropes to start and armdrags Valentine into an armbar as he is known to do. Some chops get two for the Dragon and he skins the cat before dropkicking Valentine in the back. In a rare botch, Ricky isn’t in the right place to roll Valentine up and has to cover him for two instead. Everyone can make a mistake every and then but it’s so strange to see it from Steamboat.

Valentine pulls Steamboat off the ropes for a big crash, giving me one of my all time favorite exchanges between Gorilla and Jesse. Gorilla: “Right on the back of the head! Right on the external occipital protuberance area!” Jesse: “The WHAT?” Gorilla: “That little bump on the back of your head.” Ricky flips out of a belly to back suplex and puts on another armbar. Greg gets back up with a big clothesline to knock Steamboat down. Gorilla: “Right on the external occipital protuberance. We talked about that Jess.” Jesse: “Ok. Back of the head for all your normal people out there.”

They slug it out as Jesse finally points out Donald Trump in the front row. Valentine can’t hook the Figure Four and Steamboat wins a slugout. Greg’s top rope chop sets up the Figure Four but Steamboat chops his way out again. Now it’s Ricky with a top rope chop to the head for two. After shoving the referee in a rare angry moment, Steamboat goes up for the cross body but Valentine rolls through for the clean pin at 9:11.

Rating: B-. Match of the night by far and while a lot of that is due to the talent in the ring, a lot of it is also due to the extra time they had. It let them build up a match instead of just getting all their stuff in, which is only a good thing when you have guys like these two out there. This would be it for Steamboat in the WWF as he headed back to the NWA after some time off.

The British Bulldogs have Matilda back after the Islanders (Heenan’s team) dognapped her. Dynamite says that Matilda has been trained for a weasel hunt (Bobby was known as the Weasel) and Koko B. Ware can’t wait for the six man tag tonight. Does this sound familiar to anyone else?

Bobby Heenan receives a package and actually TIPS THE DELIVERYMAN! Someone get him to a doctor!

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Savage, now a full on face and the second most popular act in the company, and Elizabeth are in matching blue outfits. Reed shoves Savage down as the announcers debate whether or not Gorilla would buy a used car from Slick. Savage can’t suplex the bigger Reed so Butch suplexes him instead, followed by a hard elbow to the face. Savage’s elbows have little effect as Reed drops him again, only to spend WAY too much time yelling at Elizabeth as he goes up. Butch gets slammed down, setting up the flying elbow for the pin at 4:09.

Rating: D+. This did exactly what it was supposed to do as Savage is going to have a deep run in this thing so giving him a relatively easy first round match made sense. Reed was fine in this role as a power guy who posed a bit of a threat but ultimately had no chance. This would be his last match for the WWF before he headed for the NWA as well.

Heenan isn’t worried about the British Bulldogs or that mutt Matilda because he has the Islanders and a surprise to back it up. Uecker is offended and won’t speak at their outrigger dinner.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Bam Bam Bigelow vs. One Man Gang

Two monsters here as Gang is a big biker with Slick as his manager and Bigelow is a slightly smaller (6’4, 393lbs) guy who can fly around amazingly well for someone his size. He also has Oliver Humperdink (a pretty low level yet very colorful manager) in his corner. Gang jumps him from behind and splashes Bigelow in the corner as Monsoon talks about wrestling at 440lbs. Jesse is stunned and wants to hear about Monsoon’s diet back then in a funny bit that only the two of them could pull off.

Bigelow makes a quick comeback and hits a pair of headbutts, only to have Slick pull the rope down to send Bigelow outside, drawing a countout at 2:55. You would think that Bigelow being on the apron for about seven of those counts and having one foot in the ring at ten would be enough to save him but not quite. This was it for Bigelow for all intents and purposes as he needed knee surgery and would also be in the NWA by the end of the year.

Gene is in the back with Hogan, who talks about his rematch with Andre. After saying about what you would expect him to say, Hogan goes into a bizarre rant about slamming Andre and breaking America off from the fault line and causing everyone to fall into the ocean. Now things get even more insane and it has to be quoted for posterity’s sake if nothing else:

“So will Donald Trump and all the Hulkamaniacs. But as Donald Trump hangs on to the top of the Trump Plaza with his family under his other arm, as they sink to the bottom of the sea, THANK GOD Donald Trump’s a Hulkamaniac. He’ll know enough to let go of his materialistic possessions, hang on to the wife and kids, dog paddle with his life all the way to safety. But Donald, if somehow you run out of gas, and all those little Hulkamaniacs run out of gas, just hang onto the largest back in the world and I’ll dog paddle us, backstroke all of us to safety.”

So to recap:

1. Hulk Hogan basically just declared himself Jesus.

2. Wouldn’t everyone on his back drown is he backstrokes through the ocean?

3. What’s with the referencing to backstroking tonight?

4. Gene’s face during Hogan’s speech is bordering on terror as he tries not to let his jaw hang open and/or ask what on earth Hogan is talking about.

WWF World Title Tournament First Round: Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

These two would be about to start an awesome feud due to Rude trying to hit on Jake’s wife. Rude, with Heenan in his corner, is still a goofy ladies man here but he could be a heavy hitter when he needed to be. Feeling out process to start until Jake scores with some slams to send Rude into the corner. Jake starts cranking on the arm and even holds it when Rude punches him to the mat for a unique visual.

The wristlock stays on as they hit the mat, which sounds like the calling card of the fifteen minute time limit draw. Back up and a knee lift looks to set up the DDT but Rude bails to the floor. More stalling ensues until Jake slams him again but he misses another knee lift and crashes to the mat. The hip swivel and an elbow drop get a VERY slow two for Rude and we hit the chinlock. They’re not even hiding the impending draw. Even Jesse is wondering why Rude is doing something like this with such a short time limit.

Rude elbows him down for two and we hit yet another chinlock. Jake fights up with a belly to back suplex and Rude STILL won’t let go of the hold. Some stomps set up the fifth chinlock of the match and Jake looks asleep. The fans are loudly booing this until Jake finally escapes with a jawbreaker. It’s a remarkable improvement for the fans as they go from booing to just silent instead. Jake starts his comeback with a short clothesline but the DDT is broken up. A double clothesline makes the fans audibly groan. Rude is up first and grabs a rollup with his feet on the ropes but the bell rings for the draw at 15:13 (eh close enough).

Rating: F. Absolutely awful here as over five minutes of the match was spent in a chinlock. It’s easy to have a fifteen minute match go to a draw without boring the fans to death but they didn’t even try here. I know you don’t want to do another countout after the previous one, but what about a double DQ that eats up half the time or something like that? This was awful and just a way to waste time.

Here are the updated brackets:

Hulk Hogan

Andre the Giant

Ted DiBiase

Don Muraco

Greg Valentine

Ricky Steamboat

One Man Gang

BYE

Gene is with Vanna White (of Wheel of Fortune) but she’s never heard of Bob Uecker. They give us a quick preview of the second round and praise Hogan a bit. Vanna likes Elizabeth as “a woman person” behind Savage. White may not have been a huge wrestling fan but she knew how to have a great smile and a lot of charisma here. As I said earlier: it helps when they sound like they want to be here and Vanna seemed like she was having a good time.

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Warrior is relatively new (he debuted in October) and this is just a power vs. power match. They shove each other around to start until Warrior takes him into the corner for some hard chops. This is before Warrior had figured out the formula that made him a star so this is quite a different style. Hercules needs three clotheslines to put Rude down but Warrior pops up because they’re just clotheslines.

Ever the villain, Jesse suggests that Hercules choke Warrior out with the tassels on Warrior’s arms. It’s not a bad idea actually. They slug it out and don’t seem to know where to go next. I can understand that from Warrior but Hercules is a veteran at this point. An atomic drop puts Warrior down out of the corner and Heenan says slap it on him. There’s the full nelson but Warrior climbs the turnbuckles and falls backwards onto Hercules, raising his shoulder up for the pin at 4:36.

Rating: D. See, as boring as this one was, at least they kept it short and you had Warrior being all insane (character insane as opposed to real life insane) to keep things active. Like I said, this is completely different than the normal Warrior style and it was interesting to see something out of the ordinary.

Hercules comes in with the chain but Warrior takes it away and swings it around to clean house.

We see some Wrestlemania IV merchandise as we’re in an intermission.

Boxing legend Sugar Ray Leonard is here.

Long recap of Andre vs. Hogan, including the build up to Wrestlemania III, DiBiase paying Andre to bring him the title and the Main Event match which set up the tournament.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

Andre has DiBiase and Virgil with him. Hogan charges right at the Giant but Andre is ready for him with a bunch of right hands. Some running forearms have Andre staggered and Hulk rams him into DiBiase for good measure. Andre gets tied up in the ropes but Hogan walks around forever, allowing DiBiase and Virgil to get Andre loose.

Even more right hands drop Andre and three straight elbows get two, only to have Andre grab Hogan by the throat to break up the cover. Andre sits on Hogan because he doesn’t like to make his offense that complicated. We hit the trapezius hold from the Giant but Hulk pops up with more right hands. A Virgil distraction lets DiBiase sneak in with a chair but Hogan takes it away and hits Andre. The Giant takes the chair and hits Hogan with it….and that’s a double DQ at 5:23.

Rating: D. Yeah the match sucked but my goodness how in the world do you call that a double DQ? Hogan hit him first and the referee was looking right at him but for some reason both guys are out. That sounds about as cut and dry as you can get but tournaments can cause some screwy results.

Hogan slams Andre and poses even though he’s out of the tournament. DiBiase runs and throws Virgil at Hogan to take the beating in the aisle. Gorilla turns into Yoda and says that “neither one of these men will be entitled to wear the belt of the champion.” As the posing ensues, Jesse thinks this was all part of the master plan. That’s because Jesse was one of the smartest commentators ever and gets common sense while Gorilla was a glorified Hogan fan. This goes on for WAY too long and feels like the end of the show while Jesse says we’ll know who the real greatest is in another hour.

Savage, now in pink to match Elizabeth again, says no one has ever defeated Hogan. Now that he’s out though, he’s going to make sure that the other half of the Mega Powers goes all the way.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Don Muraco vs. Ted DiBiase

The winner goes to the finals due to the double DQ. Muraco reaches through the ropes to get DiBiase (alone here) as the bell rings and Jesse freaks out because it’s not fair to Ted. Again, totally correct but Gorilla ignores him. A powerslam and a middle rope elbow get two each for Muraco so DiBiase rolls outside. That’s even worse as he has to run from Graham and his cane. Back in and DiBiase sends him hard into the buckle to set up some choking. That sweet falling fist drop gets two for DiBiase but he misses an elbow. Back up and Muraco charges into a stun gun to send DiBiase to the finals at 5:35.

Rating: D+. I find it interesting that DiBiase has won his first two matches without using his finishing hold. It’s always cool to see them mix things up like that instead of doing the same stuff over and over again. Muraco was a good choice to put DiBiase over here and the match was fine enough. Not good but fine.

Demolition says they’re going to hit Strike Force over the head with baseball bats to win the Tag Team Titles. Uecker is rightfully freaked out.

One Man Gang’s second round bye is announced to the crowd.

WWF World Title Tournament Quarterfinals: Greg Valentine vs. Randy Savage

This should be good. Savage goes for a quick rollup but Greg goes up top and drops a forearm to the back for two. Donald Trump is still in the front row and seems to actually be enjoying himself. They fight to the floor with Greg chopping even more, followed by some heavy elbows to the chest. Back in and Valentine starts in on the leg but opts for a suplex instead. Savage suddenly goes nuts and hits the top rope ax handle. He tries for a second but gets punched out of the air. Valentine can’t follow up but avoids a charge against the ropes. The Figure Four is countered into a small package and Savage advances at 6:07.

Rating: D. Quite the disappointing match here as you would expect far better chemistry from these two. Valentine barely touched the leg and was just going with the big forearms and elbows, which were normally only about half of his offense. Savage had one burst of offense and then won in the end on a fluke again, which is pretty standard for him. Not a good match here, which is a really bit surprise.

Here are the updated brackets:

Ted DiBiase

BYE

One Man Gang

Randy Savage

Vanna and Gene talk about the upcoming matches.

Intercontinental Title: Honky Tonk Man vs. Brutus Beefcake

This is one of Beefcake’s 283 or so shots at the titles over the year. Honky Tonk now has his girlfriend Peggy Sue with him (Sherri Martel as a dancing 50s girl). Jesse says he’s playing piano during Honky Tonk’s music. Unfortunately Beefcake doesn’t have his awesome music yet. The champ stalls forever so Jesse says hi to Terri, Tyrel and Jade (his wife and kids) back in Minneapolis as was his custom. A big atomic drop gives us the Honky Tonk selling and a right hand sends him outside.

Back in and Beefcake motions for a haircut before he sends Honky Tonk into the buckle over and over. Brutus finally misses a big elbow to give Honky Tonk an opening for his variety of stomping. Some choking looks to set up the Shake Rattle and Roll but the champ lets go. Jimmy Hart is confused but it turns out that they needed to move closer to the ropes so Brutus could block. I guess this is before backdrops were invented.

Beefcake grabs the sleeper but Hart knocks the referee cold with the megaphone. Instead of waking up the referee (why does that almost never happen?), Brutus goes for the scissors and cuts Jimmy’s hair instead. No one can wake Honky Tonk up so Peggy pours water over his face. Brutus tries to bring in the hedge clippers and the match is thrown out at somewhere around 6:00.

Rating: D. Another lame match here as Honky Tonk was all about the heat from the crowd and couldn’t have a good match to save his life most of the time. That being said, it made him more valuable than most of the roster as the people would pay to see him get beaten up every night because there was no way he could survive one more day as champion. Keep that up for over a year and rake in the money until you have someone to shoot to the moon as the new champion. Beefcake was never going to be that guy but he was an awesome repeat challenger.

There’s another major point to talk about here. Remember how I said the tournament we got wasn’t the original plan? Well that’s because of Honky Tonk Man. The original plan here was to have Savage beat Honky Tonk Man for the title but Honky Tonk talked Vince out of it/threatened to jump to the NWA with the title (depending on who you ask) and his reign continued.

Instead Savage was plugged into the World Title tournament and gets the major push as a result. The original World Title tournament saw DiBiase’s master plan paying off with him beating an exhausted Hogan to win the title, (the original brackets were aired on TV before they were changed to this version) setting up Savage winning it at Summerslam and going forward with history from there.

Andre puts his massive hand on Uecker’s shoulder to scare him to death while explaining the master plan. All he was supposed to do was get Hogan out of the tournament and he did his job perfectly. He chokes Uecker for fun, bugging Bob’s eyes out in a semi-famous bit.

Islanders/Bobby Heenan vs. British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware

We get to see what was inside Bobby’s delivery earlier: a dog handler’s outfit, which Jesse calls a stroke of genius. Dynamite hiptosses Haku (formerly King Tonga) and Tama down to start before catapulting Tama over the corner and out to the floor. Off to Haku to face Davey in the power vs. power match. Davey gets two off a crucifix and we hit the chinlock on Haku. You don’t often see a heel in one of those.

Haku comes back with an eye rake and forearms. Jesse: “Heenan is saving himself Gorilla.” Gorilla: “Yeah for the senior prom.” Dynamite finally charges into a kick in the corner and it’s off to Heenan for some stomps. Jesse describes him as looking like “A Chinaman” and the cook from Bonanza.

A single right hand to the ribs sends Bobby running and it’s off to Koko for some meaningless headbutts. Thankfully the Islanders don’t sell because they respect racial stereotypes and it’s back to Heenan to work on Koko some more. Ware sends him into the corner though and everything breaks down with the Islanders slamming Bobby onto Koko for the pin at 7:31.

Rating: D+. So this was basically the Heenan Family replacing the Hart Foundation from last year. Heenan was funnier than Davis though and it almost made for a more entertaining match, but that beating that Davis took last year was a thing of beauty. Still good enough here and Koko continues to be the man you get when you need a filler.

Jesse is presented to the crowd again in another rather pointless segment.

DiBiase’s bye into the finals is announced.

WWF World Title Tournament Semifinals: Randy Savage vs. One Man Gang

Elizabeth is in black to match Savage’s robe but his trunks are purple. Savage gets smart and grabs the beard to start and snaps Gang’s throat over the top rope. That’s it for Savage’s offense though as the much bigger Gang drives him into the corner to take over. Gang gets two off a slam but Savage gets his foot on the ropes.

The big splash misses though and Savage ax handles him to the floor. A top rope ax handle to the floor has Gang reeling but Savage tries a slam like a schnook and fails miserably. Elizabeth gets on the apron for no apparent reason and Slick throws in the cane. Gang misses every swing but it’s a DQ anyway at 4:35.

Rating: D. They were setting up a fine match until the lame ending. How do you disqualify someone for failing to cheat? Then again this is the same show where there was a countout when someone was halfway in the ring and a chair to the head somehow setting up a double DQ. Savage should have won this off a missed charge and a quick rollup or something but instead they went with some botched cheating.

Vanna has to go to ringside for the final and Uecker shows up just a few seconds late. Gene says Vanna has no idea who Uecker is but he says she’s sent him a ton of letters. “Yeah some guy named Vance White.” I really hope there’s a joke I’m not getting there because that’s really not funny.

Tag Team Titles: Demolition vs. Strike Force

Demolition is challenging and has Mr. Fuji in their corner. Strike Force is the sequel to the Can-Am Connection with Martel teaming up with Tito Santana to win the Tag Team Titles from the Hart Foundation back in the fall. Smash pounds Martel down to start and the other two come in as everything breaks down. A double clothesline gets two on Smash as the crowd is quiet, likely due to exhaustion at this point.

Tito armdrags Ax down and Martel hiptosses Smash down for good measure. Smash is still strong enough to catch a charging Santana in midair and carries him over to Ax for a clothesline in a kind of prototype Hart Attack. Jesse gives tips on double teaming as Smash gets two off a suplex. Tito finally scores with the flying forearm, which Jesse says he learned in the Mexican Football League. It’s finally off to Martel to clean house but the fans just do not care. Martel gets the Boston crab on Smash but Ax sneaks in with the cane (a must have for any heel manager) to knock Martel out and give Smash the pin at 8:03.

Rating: D+. The fans reacted to the title change but there wasn’t much else for them to care about. The match wasn’t bad but it took a lot of time to get to the ending as this show feels like it’s been going on forever. Demolition would go on to have the longest reign in the history of the titles so this was quite the historic change. Strike Force was an underrated team and I was hoping to see them get back in the title change but it would never come.

It’s FINALLY time for the main event with Uecker as the ring announcer and Vanna as the timekeeper. Robin Leech is also here to present the World Title belt to the winner. Uecker gets a kiss from Vanna to wrap up the show long story.

WWF World Title: Ted DiBiase vs. Randy Savage

DiBiase has Andre with him but Virgil is probably still in the hospital after that one suplex. The final matching outfit sees Savage and Elizabeth all in white which feels appropriate for some reason. Savage is rightfully freaked out (freaked out freaked out) by Andre, who grabs Randy’s foot to make it even worse. The fans, proving that they are in fact alive, chant for Hogan.

They fight over arm control until Ted’s sunset flip is broken up by a right hand to the face. Some elbows to the back of Savage’s head changes control again but a knee to the back sends DiBiase outside. Savage goes up but Andre stands in front of him and says jump. If Savage jumps at him and gets attacked doesn’t that mean a DQ, which could mean Savage wins the title? Leave the planning to DiBiase Giant. Savage realizes something must be done and sends Elizabeth off to the back for help.

As Ted cranks on a chinlock, we get the obvious return of Hogan who sits down in the corner to keep an eye on things. Andre goes after Savage again but Hogan runs over with a right hand to even things up again. A suplex gets two for Ted but he gets slammed off the top, only to have Savage miss the elbow. DiBiase slaps on the sleeper but the referee goes to yell at Andre. Hogan comes in (wearing cowboy boots of all things) and chairs DiBiase in the back, setting up the elbow to make Savage champion at 9:17.

Rating: C. The match was fine but it came at the end of a far too long show. In their defense, the fans went nuts when Savage won, despite the blatant cheating from Hogan. As usual, Hulk continues to be really evil under the surface but to his credit Savage didn’t see what Hogan did. Good enough match but it came too late in the night.

Savage, Hogan and Elizabeth celebrate in the ring to wrap up the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was LONG. The show felt like it went on for about nineteen days with so many worthless matches (Bravo vs. Muraco and Warrior vs. Hercules?) and stuff not getting enough time because we needed SIXTEEN MATCHES on one show. Savage winning the title was one of the two best options along with DiBiase so I can’t complain there, but this really needed to be cut down by an hour and minus about six matches. Or get a shorter ramp to cut down on the way too long entrances.

This is a show that really could have benefited from the modern pay per view style as there are regularly scheduled twenty minute matches on most pay per views. The problem here was you had all those matches, meaning a lot of entrances to eat up time. It made for a VERY long night and the show felt like it was never going to end. Do yourself a favor and watch the first Clash of the Champions, which aired on the same night and partially at the same time.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: C

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Ted DiBiase vs. Jim Duggan

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: C-

Don Muraco vs. Dino Bravo

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Greg Valentine vs. Ricky Steamboat

Original: C

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: B-

Randy Savage vs. Butch Reed

Original: D

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D+

One Man Gang vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2015 Redo: N/A

Rick Rude vs. Jake Roberts

Original: D

2013 Redo: D-

2015 Redo: F

Ultimate Warrior vs. Hercules

Original: D

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Hulk Hogan vs. Andre the Giant

Original: C

2013 Redo: C-

2015 Redo: D

Ted DiBiase vs. Don Muraco

Original: C+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: D+

Randy Savage vs. Greg Valentine

Original: C+

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: D

Brutus Beefcake vs. Honky Tonk Man

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D+

2015 Redo: D

Islanders/Bobby Heenan vs. British Bulldogs/Koko B. Ware

Original: D+

2013 Redo: C

2015 Redo: D+

Randy Savage vs. One Man Gang

Original: D

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

Demolition vs. Strike Force

Original: C-

2013 Redo: C+

2015 Redo: D+

Randy Savage vs. Ted DiBiase

Original: B

2013 Redo: B-

2015 Redo: C

Overall Rating

Original: D+

2013 Redo: D

2015 Redo: D

I even got annoyed trying to write up the new ratings comparison. This show is that much of a mess.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/11/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-4-one-big-tournament-and-thats-it/

And the 2013 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/03/13/wrestlemania-count-up-wrestlemania-iv-the-biggest-tournament-ever/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: September 28, 2007
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re just over a week away from No Mercy and the big Smackdown match is going to be Batista defending the World Title against the Great Khali inside the Punjabi Prison. I’m sure that won’t be a complete disaster as Khali can barely get through a regular match, but stranger things have happened. Now to build the rest of the show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.We open with a recap of last week’s wedding between Teddy Long and Kristal, capped off by the traditional groom’s heart attack.

Vickie Guerrero comes in to see Vince McMahon and tells him that Teddy has been in a coma for a week and has a history of heart disease. Vince says the show must go on and makes Vickie the new General Manager. Vickie leaves so here is Finlay, who has some things in common with McMahon. They’re both Irish, but they also both have to deal with Hornswoggle. They’ll work on that later.

Opening sequence.

Victoria vs. Torrie Wilson

Victoria takes her down into a front facelock to start as we hear about various things involving looking at Torrie. Back up and Torrie sends her into the ropes and grabs a rollup for two. Cole talks about how much Torrie has improved in the ring but JBL says who cares as long as we can look at her. A snap suplex gives Victoria two but Torrie is back with a headscissors and clothesline. Torrie tries a sunset flip out of the corner but Victoria sits down on it and grabs the ropes for the pin.

Rating: C-. It wasn’t much of a match, but Cole is right that Torrie has improved in the ring. She’s never going to be the top worker in the division, but she can work a decent enough basic match. The match wasn’t terrible and given how some of the division can be, this was at least passable.

Post match another blonde (looks a good bit like Torrie) comes in and stomps Torrie down, before bending her back around the post to leave her laying.

It’s time for MVP’s VIP Lounge, complete with a bunch of people sitting in on the set. MVP talks about Teddy Long having a heart attack after bringing so much heartache to WWE. Long’s biggest accomplishment is bringing MVP to WWE with this big of a contract and that is because he is better than everyone else. Tonight happens to be a special night for MVP, because it is his one year anniversary around here.

Now he has captured the Tag Team Titles with Matt Hardy…who comes out to interrupt, complete with a gold bottle. Matt acknowledges that even though it isn’t his thing, the VIP Lounge is a big deal. That being said, he knew he had to be here because MVP is his partner and his homie. Matt even has a gift for him in the form of a highlight video of MVP’s first year in WWE. You can imagine all of the horrible things that happen to MVP in said video, which is complete with a lame pop song.

MVP snaps about the video but Matt says he was just ribbing him. Matt calms him down with the bottle, which is popped open and poured, which has MVP calmed down a bit. The toast though sees Matt insulting MVP, who throws Matt out. Hold on though as Matt has one more gift: MVP gets to face Kane tonight!

Chuck Palumbo vs. Kenny Dykstra

Dykstra kicks him down and fires off some boots to the back before we hit the chinlock. Palumbo fights up with an elbow to the face and a backdrop as the pace picks up fast. A middle rope dive is countered into an overhead belly to belly to send Dykstra flying. The Full Throttle finishes for Palumbo in a hurry.

Rating: D+. It was another short match that didn’t have time to go anywhere, but what were you expecting from Palumbo vs. Dykstra? This match wasn’t designed to be some kind of a classic, though it isn’t a good sign when it is the second match in a row that would fit that description. Palumbo isn’t going very far around here, but he’s good enough for a lower card guy.

Steve Austin still things the Marine is pretty snazzy.

Jesse and Festus are ready to debut next week, with Jesse promising Festus will come to life when the bell rings.

Commentary explains the Punjabi Prison and look at Great Khali destroying Batista.

Batista joins us in the back for an interview and says he has no idea how a Punjabi Prison match works. JBL interprets this as him being scared but Batista says Khali will have to take the title from his cold, dead hands. The champ didn’t have much to say here.

Kane vs. MVP

Non-title and MVP starts by cranking on the arm, only to get thrown down by straight power. Some uppercuts in the corner look to set up the big boot but MVP bails to the floor for a breather. That’s enough for MVP to snap Kane’s throat across the top but Kane runs him over again. Kane charges into an elbow in the corner though and a suplex is countered into a DDT to give MVP two.

A neckbreaker gets two more and we hit the…neck pull? Either way, MVP lets him go and Kane is back up with an elbow to the face. The top rope clothesline misses though and MVP gets two more. We hit the arm crank for a bit before Kane is back up and kicking away at the ribs. The chokeslam is blocked and they hit heads for a double knockdown and a break.

Back with MVP cranking on both arms before a running boot in the corner connects for another two. Some running corner clotheslines into the side slam give Kane two of his own but MVP breaks up another top rope clothesline. The break up is broken up though and now the clothesline can connect. The chokeslam is loaded up but MVP kicks him low for the DQ.

Rating: B. This started to roll near the end as MVP kept cutting off everything Kane threw at him. It was a question of how long MVP could hang in there before Kane finally caught him with something, which caused MVP to wrap it up with the DQ. Kane is having a rather nice run at the moment and I can always go for more of his good version.

The Diva Search girls had a limbo contest with Taryn winning. Lyndy is eliminated, crushing the dreams of dozens.

JBL brings out Rey Mysterio for an interview. He looks down at Rey and says Rey’s machismo is flat out stupidity, but Rey asks what’s up with the hatred. Does it bug JBL when he is here interviewing Rey instead of someone interviewing him? OF COURSE IT DOES, because JBL has twice the talent as Rey. That’s cool with Mysterio, who tells JBL to put up or shut up. JBL brings up Rey’s match against Great Khali next week and shoves him down, only to have Rey come back. The 619 is loaded up but here is Finlay with the Shillelagh to knock Rey cold.

Hornswoggle is in Vickie Guerrero’s office, where Vickie says that the Cruiserweight Title is making him a target. It’s even worse because he is now a McMahon, so she is making him abdicate the title. Hornswoggle hands it over, and that’s that for the belt. Fair enough, as it isn’t like the title has meant anything in years.

Jamie Noble vs. Shannon Moore

They start fast and head outside, with Moore sending him back first into the apron. Noble takes him off the top and grabs the Boston crab, sending Moore straight to the ropes. A swinging neckbreaker gets Moore out of trouble and a legdrop gives him two. Noble is back with something like a reverse Alabama Slam out of the corner, setting up a gutbuster for the pin.

Rating: C. Commentary kept hyping up the future of the cruiserweight division and if this is as good as it gets, they can’t get rid of the title fast enough. The division has not mattered for years now and the Hornswoggle reign was all the proof you could have needed. This was another completely watchable match, albeit one that felt like it meant a grand total of nothing.

Great Khali, through Runjin Singh, promises to get the title back from Batista.

No Mercy rundown.

Undertaker vs. Mark Henry

Henry goes straight to the floor to start (and might have gotten his leg caught in the ropes on the way out) and the fight is on. Back in and Undertaker gets up a boot in the corner before striking away. Old School is pulled out of the air and it’s Henry getting to hammer away even more. Undertaker sits up to avoid a big elbow though and there’s the jumping clothesline. The chokeslam finishes Henry quick.

Rating: C-. This felt like a way to write Henry off of the show for awhile as Undertaker shrugged off most of what Henry threw at him and then beat him with the chokeslam. I’m not sure what is next for Henry, but beating a monster like this is not the best sign for his future. Undertaker is probably back in the title picture sooner rather than later, as it is hard to keep him away from the belt for that long.

Overall Rating: D+. This was one of the lamer Smackdowns in a long time as it felt like everyone was taking a week off. The only star power was Undertaker vs. Mark Henry in a match that felt like a post show dark match wound up on television. Maybe they were just taking a week off here, but there was almost nothing worth seeing here outside of Kane vs. MVP. I’d like to believe it’s a one off situation, but this wasn’t a good show.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

 

ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 25, 2007
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Commentators: Tazz, Joey Styles

Things are in a bit of a weird place at the moment as CM Punk is the ECW World Champion but doesn’t have the best crop of challengers. The Elimination Chase is still going, but none of the three involved are the most interesting. The good sign is that the Chase gives us some other story outside of what Punk is doing so maybe there is some hope. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Tommy Dreamer vs. Elijah Burke vs. Kevin Thorn

Whoever takes the fall is eliminated from the Elimination Chase To No Mercy. Thorn elbows Dreamer out to the floor and slams Burke for an early two. Burke is back with a hiptoss as Dreamer finally gets smart by letting the other two fight. That lasts all of a few seconds before Dreamer goes back inside to beat on both of them. Back up and Thorn sends Dreamer shoulder first into the post before they go to a pinfall reversal sequence. Burke comes in to trade covers with Dreamer as well and we take a break.

We come back with Dreamer slugging away at Thorn, who takes him down into a chinlock. Dreamer gets knocked outside and dropped, leaving Thorn to beat on Burke. An over the shoulder backbreaker gives Thorn two but Burke hits him in the face. Dreamer comes back in to put Burke in the Tree of Woe, only to have Thorn cut Dreamer off. Burke hits Dreamer in the face but Dreamer goes up top for a super sunset flip on Thorn. The Texas Cloverleaf has Burke in more trouble until Thorn makes a weird save. The DDT plants Thorn, only to have Burke throw Dreamer outside to steal the pin on Thorn.

Rating: C+. I’m still not sure why one of them didn’t just walk to the back at the bell and leave the other two to fight it out. That being said, I don’t think there is going to be much drama in next week’s #1 contenders match, though I think I’d rather have Dreamer get in there over Burke, just for some variety. They did keep the match moving here so at least it wasn’t boring on the way to a not that shocking result.

CM Punk talks to some backstage workers but runs into Matt Striker with Big Daddy V. Striker accuses Punk of being truant and suggests he goes back to school. Punk says he liked school, so Striker threatens him with Big Daddy V. Punk doesn’t seem scared.

Raw Rebound.

Nunzio vs. Mike Knox

Knox throws him around without much effort as this seems like it could be a bit one sided. Nunzio gets knocked outside before it’s a backbreaker, with Nunzio’s back being bent over the knee back inside. An elbow and legdrop get one as Nunzio gets to show some heart. Knox misses a charge in the corner though and some kicks to the leg take him down. Back up and Knox kicks him in the head for the fast pin.

Rating: C-. Just a step above a squash here and that isn’t the most interesting moment. Knox isn’t exactly coming off as someone who is going to be a big player, but at least he has the slightest bit of name value. Maybe they can come up with something for him as ECW could certainly use some new, or at least fresh, stars.

SAVE US video.

Miz vs. Silas Young

Extreme Expose is here with Miz, including Kelly Kelly with Balls Mahoney’s bear. Young grabs a hammerlock to start so Miz elbows him in the face. Some choking keeps Young down in the corner and the Reality Check gives Miz the fast pin.

Post match here is Balls Mahoney to ask Kelly Kelly out again. This time she gets a microphone, but Miz takes it away and says Kelly will give him an answer. Miz decks Mahoney with the mic and the other two girls have to drag Kelly away from him.

Steve Austin signed copies of the Condemned DVD.

Elijah Burke comes up to Tommy Dreamer in the back and laughs off the idea of Dreamer being able to hang with him next week. Dreamer says he has heart, which is more important than athleticism. Eh not really.

Matt Striker vs. CM Punk

Non-title and Striker has Big Daddy V in his corner. Punk grabs a headlock to start and then hits a hard shoulder. A legdrop gets an early one before a charging Striker is backdropped out to the floor. Punk stops to look at V though and gets his arm sent into the steps. Back in and Striker clotheslines him down for two and we hit the top wristlock to stay on the arm.

Striker dropkicks him down again and we’re back to the top wristlock. The bad arm is sent into the rope before Striker gets two off a running knee. Now it’s time to bend Punk’s fingers apart, including Striker saying Punk is a Big Daddy V fan. That’s too far for Punk as he makes the comeback, including a bunch of clotheslines. The GTS finishes Striker clean.

Rating: C-. There wasn’t much on this one but was anyone going to buy Striker as a serious threat to Punk? This was more about V being the big monster that is probably coming for Punk on Striker’s orders. Striker can do some basic stuff well enough but that is about all you’re going to get out of something like this.

Post match Big Daddy V comes in to Samoan drop Punk to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Well, they are starting to get some more stories going but most of them still aren’t all that interesting. The show just does not have the star power to keep me drawn in most weeks and that is a problem. Maybe John Morrison coming back next week could help, but the show needs some more names than just him. Not a bad show, but also not an interesting one.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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