ECW On Sci Fi – March 13, 2007: With A Bunch Of Guest Stars

ECW on Sci Fi
Date: March 13, 2007
Location: Sovereign Bank Arena, Trenton, New Jersey
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Wrestlemania is on the way and ECW will actually be doing something on the show. Not only will CM Punk be in Money in the Bank, but we get the big eight man tag between the New Breed and the ECW Originals. That alone should be more than enough to carry ECW TV, but this week gets a bonus with a special appearance by Mick Foley. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory Of Ernie Ladd.

Edge is in the back when Randy Orton comes up to yell at him for setting up Orton vs. Bobby Lashley tonight. Orton says Edge is kissing up to Vince McMahon and tensions are rather high.

Opening sequence.

Battle Royal

Tommy Dreamer, Rob Van Dam, Sabu, Sandman, Marcus Cor Von, Matt Striker, Kevin Thorn, Elijah Burke

The teams come out together but it’s one winner only. It’s a brawl to start (as it should be) with Sandman hammering on Striker in the corner. The posing is a bit too much though and Striker tosses him out without much effort. Sabu and Van Dam get rid of Cor Von, which probably should have been a bigger deal. Thorn blocks Sabu’s hurricanrana to toss him out as the eliminations are starting fast.

Van Dam kicks away at Thorn, including the step over kick to put him down. Striker cuts Van Dam off though as we’re into the everyone brawls without tossing anyone stage. A kick to the face rocks Thorn and some clotheslines get rid of him but Striker is right behind him to toss Van Dam as well.

We’re down to Striker, Burke and Dreamer, the latter of whom has to fight out of the corner. For some reason Striker charges at Dreamer in the corner and gets backdropped out, leaving us with Burke vs. Dreamer. Burke dropkicks him off the top but Dreamer hangs on and gets up on the apron. Back in and Dreamer blocks a big boot and shoves Burke out to win (with the Originals being announced as the winners).

Rating: C-. They kept this moving fast enough and that’s always appreciated in a battle royal with so many losers. Dreamer winning is a good idea as you need to give someone other than Van Dam some momentum in the feud and it’s not like losing in a battle royal is some kind of career death sentence. This feud is more than enough to carry ECW for the time being and this was a fine way to go for the week.

Post match the Originals all get back inside and here is Mick Foley. Post break, Foley says you might think that he is here for a cheap pop…..and you would be exactly right! He is here to talk about his new book, but he is also here to talk about Wrestlemania. Foley talks about turning on Tommy Dreamer last year and it made him unpopular with some of the boys.

Yes he is here to talk about his book because he has never been so honest before. He talks about everyone and everything in it and he wants Dreamer to look at it. Dreamer drops the book but Foley talks about how he turned on Dreamer last year. Yeah he loves the pop and the crowd reaction but One Night Stand meant so much to him that he wanted to shine the spotlight on Dreamer.

Sabu deserves the attention as well and that’s why we are getting to Wrestlemania. It is time for the Originals to face the New Breed in front of 70,000 people. Foley never got to do that and he is going to make it 70,001 by being at Wrestlemania in the stands. He will somehow squeeze into a seat and let his voice be heard as he chants ECW. The chant starts up again….at least a little bit. This was Foley trying as hard as he could to get an idea over but it is only going to get so far when it’s ECW in 2007.

Video on Snitsky.

Extreme Expose….is cut off by Snitsky.

Snitsky vs. Michael Deek/Danny Jacks

Total destruction, with Snitsky pinning Deek after a big boot in about forty seconds.

Elijah Burke wants CM Punk’s answer about joining the New Breed. Punk isn’t ready to answer but Burke asks him about his bad night on Smackdown. That’s not cool with Punk, but Burke wants to make sure Wrestlemania is a good night for Punk. Just think about it, and Burke hands him a New Breed shirt.

Celebrities offer their hair cut picks.

Long video on the Battle of the Billionaires contract signing from Raw.

Bobby Lashley vs. Randy Orton

Non-title and Edge comes out to watch. Lashley powers him into the corner to start but Orton gets smart by taking out the leg. A chop block puts Lashley down and the knee drop keeps him in trouble. Back up and Lashley sends him outside where Edge yells at Orton as we take a break.

We come back with Orton holding Lashley in a Boston crab, meaning it’s time to crawl to the rope. Orton stomps away but Lashley fights up, earning himself a poke to the eye to cut him off again. The RKO is blocked so Edge grabs the title, which is enough for an ejection. Edge seems rather happy as Orton yells at him and we take another break.

Back again with Orton hitting a suplex on the floor for a near fall, followed by the Orton Stomp. Another Boston crab goes on, with Orton being smart enough to face the ropes this time. Orton even bends forward to push onto the ropes….which I’m assuming adds some kind of extra pressure in heel logic.

Lashley gets out and the fans are not pleased with anything about Orton. They are a bit more appreciative of Orton being sent shoulder first into the post and getting torture racked. Lashley drops to his knees for the backbreaker and it’s time to unload in the corner. The running powerslam finishes Orton clean in a pretty flat ending.

Rating: C. The ending really sucked the life out of this one, which is impressive as it didn’t have a ton of life in the first place. Lashley has all of the tools you could need but he really isn’t feeling it in the ring with these matches. It wasn’t so much a hot comeback as much as Lashley hit a few moves and then won with his finisher. Not bad, but it got a very big “that’s it?”.

Vince McMahon, looking snazzy in a black pinstripe suit with a black tie, comes out to glare at Lashley to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. Not their best show here, but what matters is they have something big to focus on with the faction warfare. The problem is I’m not sure what the rest of the show is going to do when Lashley is out of the real Wrestlemania main event slot. The show wasn’t great, but it kept things moving, albeit fairly slowly, on the way to Wrestlemania.

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205 Live – August 6, 2021: None Of This Matters

205 Live
Date: August 6, 2021
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

Believe it or not, then everything changed again. This time around, WWE has released almost everyone on the 205 Live roster, meaning the show could look very strange in the coming weeks. This show was taped in advance though, meaning this is going to be a pretty stand alone edition. That’s as opposed to the rest of the shows of course. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Leon Ruff vs. Grayson Waller

The fans are behind Ruff, even as Waller powers him to the mat and gets in the hair slapping. Back up and Ruff knocks him to the floor without much effort, meaning it’s Waller’s turn to be annoyed. Waller gets back inside and is knocked into the corner so Ruff hammers away. That takes a bit too long though as Waller reverses into an electric chair suplex for a cool counter. A slingshot double stomp to the back in the corner rocks Ruff again and Waller drops him with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Ruff is sent outside so Waller teases a dive before sliding to the floor for an STO.

Waller spends a bit too much time talking trash though and Ruff flip dives off the steps to drop him for a change. Back in and Waller is fine enough for the torture rack into the Regal Roll, setting up the middle rope elbow for two. Something like a surfboard with knees in Ruff’s back keep him in trouble but he comes back up with a DDT to plant Waller. A springboard cutter gives Ruff two but he misses the frog splash. Waller loads up the fireman’s carry, which is reversed into a quick crucifix bomb to give Ruff the surprise pin at 9:39.

Rating: B-. That’s one of the better matches on 205 Live in a long time and of course it means absolutely nothing because WWE let Ruff go. Commentary made it clear that Ruff had not wrestled in a long time so you could probably see the writing on the wall for him here. Such is life on 205 Live, as Ruff would have been a perfectly logical addition to the roster but we need to drop him because it makes too much sense.

Kushida vs. Ari Sterling

Non-title. They go with a crisscross of all things to start and it’s an early standoff. Kushida takes him down by the arm and cranks away until Sterling armdrags his way to freedom. A dropkick puts Kushida on the floor but he avoids a springboard moonsault and dropkicks Sterling’s knee.

Back in and Sterling drops him across the top rope for the running flip Fameasser. A bodyscissors goes on but Kushida turns it into a leglock to break things up in a hurry. Sterling is fine enough to break up a handspring with a kick to the back. A running hurricanrana brings Kushida back down off the top but he nails a kick to the arm. The basement dropkick is enough to set up the Hoverboard Lock to make Sterling tap at 6:11.

Rating: C+. They were moving around out there and Kushida did a nice job of reeling in the kind of wild (not a bad thing) Sterling. That made for a good story, as Kushida was the more skilled and just had to wait to catch Sterling going one step too far. Again though, none of that matters as Sterling is already gone from the company as the roster destruction continues.

Overall Rating: B-. Just like the opener, this was one of the best things that the we have seen around here in a good while and none of it means a thing. I’m not sure why this show exists, at least in its current form, as WWE keeps getting rid of everyone around here. Changing this into some kind of a supplemental show for NXT would work better, as there is no reason to keep it focused on the rather limited cruiserweight division. Good show, with absolutely no long term impact.

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Smackdown – August 13, 2021: He Showed Up

Smackdown
Date: August 13, 2021
Location: BOK Center, Tulsa, Oklahoma
Commentators: Michael Cole, Pat McAfee

We have two shows to go before Summerslam and John Cena is actually on TV this week. For some reason he has been around for the last few weeks working dark matches but hasn’t shown up on the actual shows. He’s here tonight to face Roman Reigns though and that needs to be great. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is John Cena to get things going. After we get a quick look at how Cena vs. Roman Reigns was set up, Cena says that since school is back in session, it is time to give Roman his report card. Reigns gets a D, because he is a D-head, a D-bag and a D-isappointment. At Summerslam Reigns is getting an F, but for now though, it is time to have a pop quiz. The fans are asked if they think Reigns will beat him up at Summerslam and they don’t quite buy it. Cena admits that he will take a beating at Summerslam but he’s also beating Reigns.

Cue Reigns and Paul Heyman for a chat after a break. Back with Reigns saying “let’s get to it” but Cena says he is going to wait for a week from tomorrow on the grandest stage of them all. Cena says he is back because Reigns is full of himself and Cena is the only one who can shut him up. Reigns has been a failure for a decade now despite how hard WWE has pushed him. No one has a chance with him not though and that’s why WWE asked him to come back.

Cena polls the fans about which team they’re on but Reigns says he was hoping for something fresh. Give him something to cut him already. Cena says Reigns is going to give him a bunch of spears and big punches while the slimy guy holds up the title in the corner. Reigns is going to beat him up but all Cena has to do is pin him. The reality is that Cena is here to help him, which Reigns finds funny.

Reigns doesn’t bury his opponent and then beat them because he does things differently. He knows Cena is on the Mt. Rushmore of WWE and balances Hollywood on top of that. Cena is good enough to verbally joust with anyone and main event Summerslam with the Tribal Chief. He’s good enough to win the WWE Title but not enough to win the Universal Title. Reigns: “Twenty plus years of missionary might have been good enough for you, but it wasn’t good enough for Nikki Bella.” You can hear the fans (and Cena) gasp on that one and Reigns promises to win at Summerslam.

Cena laughs back at him and says Reigns has been protected by the Shield but he even ran Dean Ambrose out of WWE. He has five Wrestlemania main events in ten years and everything behind him but he still needs to be embarrassed. Cena knows what he has to do at Summerslam because he already beat Suplex City.

All he has to do is hang in there and get the 1-2-3 and Reigns is done. If Cena pulls it off once, Reigns becomes the answer to a trivia question. At Summerslam, the champ is gone, 1-2-3. They cranked it up here and I want to see the match more than I did before, but the Nikki Bella line was the only bombshell and it doesn’t mean as much with Cena married to someone else. Adding in the idea that Reigns has something to prove was a good idea though, as that part hasn’t really been touched on enough.

Intercontinental Title: King Nakamura vs. Apollo Crews

Crews is defending and has Commander Azeez with him, as canceled out by Rick Boogs. Nakamura takes him down to start but an Azeez distraction lets Crews elbow him in the face. That just earns him the running knee to the ribs in the corner, which draws Azeez up. Boogs guitars him down so both of them are ejected as we take a break.

Back with Crews catching him on top for a superplex and following with a powerbomb for two. The frog splash misses but Crews catches him with a jumping enziguri for two more, with the referee catching the feet on the ropes. Back up and Nakamura grabs a suplex, followed by Kinshasa to give Nakamura the pin and the title at 10:11.

Rating: C. Nice back and forth match here and it’s a good idea to give Nakamura the title. He has been doing well with the Boogs stuff and the crown makes it a bonus. They could probably shift away from the crown now that he has the title, which would free things up for a new King of the Ring. Crews was fine as champion in the short term, but this is the better choice of the two options.

Nakamura, Boogs and McAfee celebrate.

Video on the Alpha Academy beating down the Street Profits and putting them on the shelf.

The Street Profits are ready for revenge.

Street Profits vs. Alpha Academy

Gable takes Ford down by the arm to start but gets headscissored for the escape. Otis comes in so Dawkins does the same, only to get caught in a fall away slam. It’s back to Gable for the shoulders in the corner before holding his towel up like a bullfighter. Dawkins gets over for the tag to Ford as everything breaks down. Ford knocks Otis outside for the big dive (which nearly landed in a faceplant as he almost over rotated). At the same time, Dawkins hits the double underhook swinging neckbreaker for the pin on Gable at 3:38.

Rating: C-. This was fine enough as a way for the Profits to get their revenge but it wouldn’t surprise me to see them do this again later. Why would they do that? Well because WWE doesn’t know how to end a feud and would rather keep things going with rematches that don’t change much of anything.

Here is Seth Rollins for a chat. He hates to be the bearer of bad news but Edge is not here tonight. It’s cool though because you get Edge-Lite, as Edge dubbed him last week. Edge cannot stand the fact that Rollins’ career has been a bit better and Rollins has a video to prove it.

We see some of Edge’s greatest moments, with each one followed by Rollins doing something similar. The video wraps up with the Rollins attack on Edge in 2014, which I don’t think I’ve thought of since it happened. Back in the arena, Rollins talks about how he did Edge a favor by not stomping him in 2014. Now Edge has a movie career and gets to push his daughters on the swings instead of them pushing a wheelchair. The fans want Edge, but Rollins gets in close to the camera to say he’ll Stomp Edge at Summerslam no matter what it does. The video worked well, as did actually showing the 2014 deal.

Rey Mysterio wants Dominik to stay hungry going into the Summerslam title match.

Bobby Roode/Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio

Roode wastes no time with a spinebuster to Rey and hands it off to Ziggler, who gets taken down with a top rope seated senton. The hot tag brings in Dominik to clean house but the Usos pop up on the Titantron to cheer for Dominik. Rey tells him not to get distracted though and it’s a victory roll to pin Roode at 3:26.

Rating: C. Just a match here but the Usos are so far ahead of the Mysterios at the moment here and it will be nice to move on from this feud. I get why they changed the titles already but this is the most lame duck title match in a long time. Not a bad match, but we saw these teams fight so many times and it is hard to care about it again.

We look back at the Cena vs. Reigns summit earlier.

Here is Baron Corbin for one last bit of begging for money. He is at the end of his rope and almost has to file for bankruptcy, but he needs about $1000 from everyone here. Corbin even has a credit card swiping thing on his phone. Cue Kevin Owens, with Corbin saying he is willing to try a Canadian credit card.

That’s not why Owens is out here though, because he finds Corbin pathetic. Who asks someone for $100,000 like he did with Drew McIntyre on Smackdown. Owens is willing to give Corbin a thousand bucks if Corbin can beat him here tonight. Otherwise, Corbin has to shut up with this begging for money. Corbin calls Owens a cheapskate and gets Stunned.

Baron Corbin vs. Kevin Owens

At least Corbin gets a break before the match, allowing him to roll Owens up for two. Owens is back with a suplex into a backsplash for two of his own. The Cannonball gets the same but Corbin knocks him off the apron with the big right hand. Corbin stomps away but the suplex on the apron is blocked. Owens loads up a powerbomb, which is countered into a backdrop to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Owens breaking up a superplex and hitting a Swanton for two. The chokeslam and Deep Six give Corbin two each and he sends Owens into the post. The rollup with feet on the ropes gets two more and Corbin counters the Stunner. A sunset flip out of nowhere gives Owens the pin at 9:50.

Rating: C. This story continues to intrigue me as Corbin was willing to fight for his money but now can’t beg anymore. That means he might be able to do something like work for his money, which could get him cheered. That might not be a bad thing these days and it should be interesting to see where they go from here.

Post match, Owens throws in a bonus Stunner.

Post break, Corbin is asked what he is going to do…..so he steals Big E.’s Money in the Bank contract and runs off.

It’s time for the Bianca Belair/Sasha Banks contract signing with Sonya Deville running things. Belair talks about how great Banks is but Banks calls her out for the hair whip at Wrestlemania. The fight is almost on but Sonya says this isn’t happening. Banks wants some witnesses so here are Carmella and Zelina Vega. Both women sign and Belair starts the fight in a hurry. Belair does ok for a bit but the numbers game gets the better of her, allowing Banks to get in a cheap shot. The Bank Statement, using Belair’s hair, on the table lets Banks hold up the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was about the pushes towards Summerslam and that worked out rather well. I’m excited for the show, which is feeling like it could be something big. Now all they have to do is live up to that hype and we could be in for a heck of a show. That has been the case for a long time in WWE though and the pieces are there to make it work this time around. Good show this week, but not their best ever.

Results
King Nakamura b. Apollo Crews – Kinshasa
Street Profits b. Apollo Academy – Double underhook swinging neckbreaker to Gable
Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio b. Dolph Ziggler/Robert Roode – Victory roll to Roode
Kevin Owens b. Baron Corbin – Sunset flip

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2009 (Original) They’re At It Again

Summerslam 2009
Date: August 23, 2009
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,129
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

With another year under our belts since the previous Summerslam, our main feuds are Cena and Orton and Punk (woo!) and Hardy. As many of you may likely know, this very well could be Hardy’s last match with the company. Our other big deal is the return (again) of DX, this time facing Legacy.

While a lot of people have criticized this, the segment that they had on Raw was excellent in my eyes. Shawn is a guy that can just come from nowhere and have a great match. The card actually looks pretty freaking sweet tonight. That doesn’t mean it’ll be good, but let’s get to this.

I liked the Summerslam logo this year. It looked a bit old school. The intro is hijacked by DX doing shadow puppets, but they freeze it on Legacy. Apparently this was the kiss cam and Cody loves Ted. Ted says ditto. So he loves himself I guess?

Anyway, they have some shenanigans going on which are kind of funny. I like the DX comedy sometimes. It’s not going to be the 90s version, so why compare it to that? It was fairly funny, involving DX breaking the feed of the intro and Shawn trying to fix it. It’s better than it sounds.

JR does the opening alone. That’s just odd. I like Aerosmith though so I’m not complaining about the music. As has become the custom, no buildup for the first match.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

I’m quite surprised this is opening. This is a rematch from NOC as well, which allegedly was brought on by Rey simply whining about not having a long enough reign yet. Based on that, I think the title change is coming here but odder things have happened before. They had a great match last month so I’m assuming this will be good too. Ziggler is growing on me, but I have a hard time getting on Kerwin White.

Rey comes out first. Why? He’s the champion. Now we get Grisham to talk so that’s an improvement I guess. I like the purple and gold on him. It’s almost reminiscent of his WCW days but not quite. I miss the big semi-circle video screen that they used to have for Summerslam. Ross forgot Ziggler’s first name. How dare he forget the real name of Ivan Drago? Ziggler’s music is awesome. How did Kerwin White actually keep a job this long?

Just goes to show you that you can’t make fun of wrestlers when they have horrible gimmicks. Other than Santino of course. He will always suck. The graphic of the belt looks very cool for some reason. Wow the IC belt is actually opening the show. That’s an odd thing to think of. Ziggler is freaking ripped. I’m getting close, dangerously close actually, to liking this guy.

Love that quick powerslam that’s done coming off of the ropes. It just looks awesome. Ok, that moonsault was SWEET. Rey doesn’t do his old style often, but when he does it’s freaking amazing. Ziggler has leopard print gloves. That’s either really stupid or really awesome. That was a pretty weak corner powerbomb. I guess Rey’s size makes up for it. This has been pretty hard hitting so far. What more can you ask for?

Apparently Rey makes a habit out of getting people in the corner and drop toe holding them. Yeah I’ve never seen him do that in the corner either. Thank you JR. Dolph just kills him with a clothesline afterwards. That looked awesome. He used a Stinger Splash. He has to be cool. Sick looking head bump on the post from it too. Rey goes for a springboard reverse crossbody but Dolph hits a perfect dropkick to the ribs. That was sweet.

This is a very good match. And there it is. We have our stupid way to get into position for the 619. My only criticism of Dolph is his offense is a bit basic. If he upgrades that he’ll be very good. He’s rocking the bad Mr. Perfect haircut though, so I’m not wild about that either. I kind of like the white ropes, but I’m not sure.

Ziggler finally avoids the springboard splash in the most basic way of all: he sits up. Why is that so complicated for some people? The fans are chanting for Ziggler here, which is surprising but also good I guess. Rey gets a hurricanrana from the top to win and keep the title in a very good match.

Rating: A-. This was a GREAT opener. It was fast paced, it was solid, and the face won. I’m hyped for the rest of the show and it’s 330 in the morning. That’s exactly what an opening match is supposed to be. See how effective the IC belt can be when it’s not being used in bad comedy angles? Ziggler looks awesome here which is all you can ask for. See what they do on Smackdown? They have the veterans make the young guys look good. That’s how you keep the future going people.

Josh is in the back with Swagger and MVP who say that tonight there’s a culture clash. Both are solid on the mic here, but Swagger impresses me a lot more. He’s got the heel character down to a T and the cockiness is perfect. MVP is good, but not as good. Also, he talks about how Swagger has this great background and was a rich kid. Ok, that’s fine, but he still won with athleticism in the NCAA. Swagger won this promo war with ease and he’s making the DDP two time two time thing better.

King and Lawler say nothing of importance.

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

My goodness…could it be? I mean, it’s impossible isn’t it? This couldn’t be…a regular non-title midcard match? I…I think it is! Now, can you find anyone that actually thinks MVP has a chance? His face turn has been a complete disaster as he’s just cut out to be the cocky heel. Go back to it already. After those promos, I’m looking forward to this. The opening 25 minutes to this has been pretty sweet so far.

MVP goes for the Ballin Elbow about 19 seconds into this, but because it takes longer than that to set it up, it doesn’t work. I don’t get why these two are having this match anyway, since Swagger pinned him clean already on Raw. This is a very slow paced match and the fans aren’t liking it that much. They’re way behind the face though as he’s in the Monsoon Special, which I’m sure Gorilla would find something wrong with.

Looking at it, it is pretty sloppy. Sick clothesline stops MVP’s comeback though. Into a half camel clutch which wouldn’t actually hurt but now it’s full. At least Swagger knows how to hurt people. Ok, Swagger gets knocked down and MVP sets up for the Ballin Elbow. I timed him on this: SIXTEEN SECONDS from the time that he got in position to the time it connected. That’s over 5 pins. Seriously, could you not just cover the guy in that amount of time?

They fight a bit more…and MVP wins clean with the playmaker? What the heck? MVP actually won this thing and he did it clean. How in the world did that happen? I’m genuinely surprised by that, and I don’t think it’s in a good way. AGAIN they mention the chick from The View. WE GET IT!

Rating: C. This was fine, but short and surprising. It certainly wasn’t bad, but at just 6 and a half minutes they didn’t have the time to get anything going. There were some bad spots in there too where it was just flat out boring, but luckily they were quick. Again, not bad, but it’s really nothing special. It felt like a Raw match.

Don’t try this at home. Good advice actually.

Luke Perry is here. I don’t care.

We get a recap of the guest hosting thing, which I think has gone well. ZZ Top was awful but other than that, I think it’s gone well. I still want to murder Dr. Ken though. It’s worked for one simple reason in my eyes: for the most part, they’ve gotten people that either have a ton of charisma or seem like legit WWE fans. That’s all you can ask for really.

Nancy O’Dell reads off a script about her charity. Yeah that’s fine. It’s for ALS, aka Lou Gehrig’s Disease. She talks to people like Freddie Prinze Jr…and that’s it. She’s apparently going to host Raw in the future. I’ll be reading something that night. She’s very annoying.

Tag Titles: Big Show/Jericho vs. Cryme Tyme

Speaking of annoying, I don’t like the champion’s new music. This has actually been built up pretty well I’d think, with Show being the partner to replace Edge when he got hurt. It seemed to me that was a last second decision, but whatever. Cryme Tyme is one of the oddest teams I can ever remember. They’ve never actually done anything, so maybe they will here. I’m not holding my breath though.

Actually, this match has gotten the third most build, which isn’t what I expected. However, I’m certainly glad to see a tag title match getting this kind of TV time. It’s what the belts really need. Again the champions come out first. Jericho runs down celebrities in general. Isn’t he a celebrity as well? Oh apparently he’s a superstar, which isn’t a celebrity. That…doesn’t make a lot of sense.

For the second time in 2 minutes we hear that they have over 40 titles between them. Show looks like he’s losing a bit of weight. That’s a good thing. Cryme Tyme interrupts Show’s promo. Remember what I said about the show being good so far? They just ruined it. They’re just freaking annoying to say the least. What have they ever actually accomplished? Oh yeah they got fired for being annoying.

JR makes another reference that no one gets. There’s no way that the faces are winning here, due to reasons of suck, but maybe at least we can get a decent match out of it. Yeah that’s not going to happen I don’t think. Jericho goes for the walls but instead goes for a slingshot. JTG just kind of jumps on him, which looks sloppy and stupid as usual. Grisham says that they’re trying to turn Hollywood into Holly-hood. Take me now.

JTG has to stay in there longer than he should simply because Shad sucks. He’s a beast as far as his look goes though, and he’s able to stand up to Show in the size department. Yeah he’s a lot better on defense. Show is freaking scary to say the least. Jericho whispers a spot to Shad which looks really bad. It’s never good when it’s on a major PPV and a veteran has to carry a team that’s been around as long as Cryme Tyme has been.

I think that’s my real issue with them: they’ve been around for a good few years and they just never get any better. The full nelson is applied, and of course we have the eternal question: WHO WAS NELSON? Maybe Babyface Nelson? Anybody? Anybody? I’ll be here all night. Jericho puts another hold on him, which makes sense because it’s really all Shad can do: get put in holds and sit there. It’s a scary thing when JTG is the bright spot of the team. Yeah this team is awful.

Jericho gets him in the Walls, and amazingly, he doesn’t tap. Seriously, can they bury this move any more than they already have? It’s just stupid how it doesn’t work on anyone at all anymore. When’s the last time someone tapped to it? Anyway, Show hits the punch for the knockout and Jericho gets the glory.

I’m really starting to like this team dynamic as Jericho does all the talking but Show wins the matches for them. At the very end of the segment, Ross mentions Big Show is undefeated at Summerslam. See, that is an interesting stat, and it would have been a lot more interesting at the beginning of the match.

Rating: D+. Yeah this was boring. Shad is just flat out awful, and JTG is just ok. The only reason they get over is their gimmick and nothing more. That’s just flat out boring in all aspects and nothing good comes of it. I can’t stand them and there was just nothing they could do here to make this interesting at all.

Ad for Breaking Point. Interesting concept, but I’m not sold on it. The main events only thing makes me feel better though.

Josh is with Punk who says a movie script he found called the Jeff Hardy story. He runs down LA and the lifestyle there and elsewhere, which yet again, rings amazingly true on so many levels. Every single thing that Punk has said in his promos has been true, and it’s amazing to say the least.

Kane vs. Great Khali

Again, no transition at all. I like Kane’s music here. Once Kane is in the ring, we actually get a long recap, which could have gone…I don’t know, before his entrance so it’s not him just standing there in the ring? This is an intriguing match to me as they’ve had a fairly long build with no official match. That’s a nice plus for a change as it gives this a bit more of a build. Now, if they manage to have a passable match, then we have proof that HBK/God vs. the McMahons was indeed a tag team match.

The reveal of Singh as Khali’s brother was pretty boring but it gives it a bit of a reason for being around Khali so much. Hopefully, this will be short and painless, but I’m not betting on that. JR mentions that Kane is on a four match winning streak at Summerslam. See? That’s another interesting stat and it makes you wonder if he can extend it here tonight. It’s small, but it adds a tiny bit more to the match and might get people more interested in it.

That’s what a commentator is supposed to do: offer insight. When you watch a DVD and listen to a special commentary, you’re listening for insights, maybe some numbers or stories that you wouldn’t know otherwise. That’s what wrestling commentators are supposed to do, but it so rarely happens which is a shame. JR says it’s a bowling shoe match, meaning we’re sorry that this is going to suck so badly.

A lot of this is just Khali showing off how strong he is, which is fine I guess, but I’d like more action. Khali misses a bad looking legdrop and then just sits there. He doesn’t sell anything or anything like that, but just sits there for the low dropkick. Kane apparently sees evil and likes it. I guess that’s why See No Evil sucked: Kane just wasn’t motivated. They fight over their respective chokeslams but that goes nowhere. Oh this is bad. It’s just so freaking sloppy.

To be fair though, what do you expect from two monsters like these? Khali with a sick sounding chop. The top rope clothesline puts Khali down and gets two. He doesn’t really kick out but it’s implied his shoulder was up. JR brings up an interesting point: if Khali quit in his language, would the referee understand it? Amazingly, the Khali chop isn’t enough for a pin. Geez Khali’s hands are freaking massive.

Kane hits a running dropkick to the knee and a running DDT for the win. That finish was kind of awesome actually. I love that Kane didn’t use a bad chokeslam to win it. That’s what I want to see more of in the WWE today: wrestlers winning with moves other than their finishers. It’s not really that hard to do and it works very well I think. Do it more often.

Rating: D+. Oy this was bad indeed. It was very sloppy, but the ending made it a lot better. Also, it was less than 6 minutes. See, that’s intelligent booking. You know these two aren’t going to have a great match, so keep it short. That makes a lot of sense and it made things a lot better than they could have been.

Some hot woman from a talk show is here. Slash is here too, so it’s closer to making me care. Robert Patrick is here.

We hit the recap button on DX vs. Legacy. This one is pretty short. HHH kept getting his head kicked in by them so he said he’d make one phone call. It wound up being about three but he eventually found Shawn as a cook in a diner in San Antonio, in what I thought was a very funny segment. This was followed up by Legacy actually beating them down in a run in on Raw a few days prior to this which at least made this look possible.

Oddly, the stuff about him being a cook is completely omitted from the recap video. What we do get though is a bunch of clips from some of their old exploits which have absolutely nothing to do with this feud or match. For some reason people were hoping that X-Pac or someone like that would return. People, the old DX is dead. All you’re going to get is these two buffoons, so be happy with it and let go of the past already.

Also, this really isn’t as bad as people make it out to be. They’re going to have decent matches and it’s going to help Legacy look legit if they win a single match, which is a good thing. DX can do whatever they like out there and they’re going to get cheered. What else can you ask for out of them really? It’s HHH against someone not named Orton. Be happy.

DX vs. Legacy

Now this is for some reason considered one of the main events. Why? What makes this one of the big matches? Yes, Shawn is back, but when HHH returned against Booker in 2007 it was a midcard match and that was fine. I get that it’s the third biggest match by default, but that doesn’t mean it should be. I’d put the tag titles above this as they’ve had far more build, but whatever. Anyway, let’s get to this.

Ok, I’ve heard great things about the DX intro, and I’ll admit, it was awesome. Basically, it’s an army theme with a bunch of troops coming out in a jeep and firing off guns. Then the stage splits apart and DX comes out on a tank, launching of a bunch of fireworks. The fans are WAY into it and it’s cool. Everything is loud and big here and the crowd is screaming. That’s what you’re looking for here. The fans are the most important thing at the end of the day and they’re loving this.

Screw the people that think the return of DX was stupid. It’s cool and it’s working. The glow sticks are a cool idea too and I’m surprised it took this long for them to be invented. It takes about 5 minutes, but so what? The reaction was awesome, so rock on. Legacy is the evil opponent here, but they have some sweet music. It’s not as great as their 39th song, but it’s better than theme 341B. The announcers point out that this is a huge chance for Legacy and they’re absolutely right.

DX is a team of two hall of fame members, and Legacy are young guys. This is their chance, so hopefully they don’t get crushed. Naturally, HHH starts going strong which makes sense as he’s the face, so why wouldn’t he be in control at first? Oh apparently the right knee of HHH is his vintage knee. That’s good to know. Shawn gets tagged in to a big pop. Apparently the fans think something of this guy.

He does a cool spot where he fakes Cody out when Cody goes for a leapfrog but Shawn gets slapped. That was stupid don’t you think? There’s the return slap that you knew was coming. Legacy is controlling the match. That’s a lot more than I expected them to do actually. HHH is in now and not dominating. This is being worked slowly towards a big ending. That’s a truly lost art in tag team wrestling today.

I’m liking this: DX gets momentum and Legacy keeps stopping them. See, this is how you build a tag team: you let them look good. That’s what veterans are supposed to do: make young guys look good. DiBiase uses a chin lock. Good to see those Orton lessons paying off. It amuses me that as a tag team, Legacy is light years more successful than DX has been. Legacy is I think 3 time tag champions?

DX has definitely never won a tag title. What does that tell you? Lawler says this isn’t what DX had in mind. Yeah they were looking for some Chinese Checkers. Legacy is doing a great job here of keeping HHH in the ring. That’s very old school and it’s working quite well here. We get the boo yay punching sequence which I always kind of hate. Shawn gets the tag in. Cody goes for the Shawn elbow, which apparently is him stealing the move.

I love how they make no issue of Shawn stealing it from Savage who was winning world titles with it before Shawn debuted in the WWF. DX is actually in trouble here and the announcers are putting them over huge, which is all you can ask for. The crowd starts wooing as Shawn puts on a figure four. Cody hits Crossroads on Shawn, which is actually a pretty good name for his finishing move I guess. Rhodes takes a Pedigree as Shawn takes Dream Street.

Dang I actually couldn’t tell Legacy apart there. That’s not a good sign at all. In one of the fastest endings I’ve ever seen, Shawn hits Sweet at least 4 inches from Cody’s Chin Music for the pin. Yeah that wasn’t even close. Literally they were both just standing up and leaning on each other then Shawn took a step back and kicked. Yeah he missed but maybe the air knocked Cody down?

Rating: A. This was a great tag team match for many reasons, but the big one was that Legacy was made to look legit. This wasn’t like when DX dismantled the Spirit Squad week in and week out. Legacy had me believing that the upset was indeed possible. DX made them look good here in a very good 20 minute match. DX should have won, but they won the right way here. That was by far Legacy’s biggest and best match ever, and they brought their best. I’m impressed with both teams.

Ad for the WM 25 special on Saturday which is going to bomb.

ECW Title: Christian vs. William Regal

Not a ton of backstory here. One night on the Abraham Washington Show, a talk show segment on ECW, Regal was simply announced as the #1 contender. 5 days prior to this, he hooked up with Kozlov and Ezekiel Jackson to form a trio with the only real thing in common being that they’re heels. This should be ok I guess. I still have no clue what the massive appeal of Christian is, although he’s had some decent matches lately.

I feel so sorry for the ECW announcers. Literally, we haven’t heard their voices until now, an hour and 40 minutes into the show. Also, yet again the champion comes out first. That’s just odd. Regal comes out with his two big henchmen.

Jackson’s heel turn was just odd as he was a face for all of two weeks and he was never an actual face at that. All that being said, it’s a 10 second match. Regal gets hit with the Killswitch and is out. Jackson and Kozlov are you beaters tonight. I prefer the Weasleys, but that’s just me. They half kill him here as the name Regal’s Roundtable is used. I like that…kind of.

Rating: N/A. Regal doesn’t belong on a major show like this, so I have no issues here at all. I’ve heard a lot of people complaining about how this was a disgrace and what not like that. Bull, this was great. Number one, the exact same thing happened last year as the ECW Title match got 33 seconds. Number two, this got the people’s attention and it made them believe that a match could end at any time.

That’s one of the major evils in WWE right now: there’s no point to watch the first 10-15 minutes of a world title match as it’s always going to go longer than that. Here you have a match where if you turn around to pet your cat the match is over. That’s brilliant. Number three, there was no build at all here. This gives you something to further the angle so you can have a rematch next month. Number four, people are talking about this now.

Isn’t that the point of any match? Number five, EVERYONE knew Christian was retaining here. How awesome does this make him look as champion? He beat an established veteran that fast with one move. This was a stroke of genius, not a disgrace.

They air some video about some F list celebrities and a charity event the roster was at. I won’t make fun of charity events, ever.

Let’s thank Aerosmith for our pointless theme song.

We get something resembling a recap of last Monday where they were tag partners. Cole says that Orton showed his true colors by attacking Orton after the match. EXCUSE ME? HE IS A FREAKING HEEL! HE NEVER WANTED TO BE IN THE TEAM IN THE FIRST PLACE! How is he showing his true colors by doing what he’s done the whole time? My goodness Cole does it cost you money to think or something?

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Well, at least it’s not HHH again. Basically, it’s pretty simple. Cena won the beat the clock thing to get here, and no one is surprised at all. In a rematch from two years ago, let’s do this. Cena runs to the ring which is kind of odd indeed. He gives his hat to his Marine co-star. Great way to get over with the kids there Johnny Boy. Orton comes out to a chorus of mostly boos. Why does the title graphic spin when the belt itself doesn’t?

My goodness I love the big fight introductions. They just work on all levels. After those, we get our recaps. Yeah that’s actually a bit better. It doesn’t waste as much time. They start off on the mat which actually goes pretty well. That’s something you rarely see from these two and while they’re hardly Kurt Angle, that was pretty good. Orton puts Cena down for awhile and when Cena is trying to get back up, it really looks like he’s trying to give Orton head through the tights.

I know that’s said a lot, but this is the closest it’s ever gotten. Orton takes FOREVER to drop a knee which looks like he’s going for a splash. It’s a new move, so of course it’s vintage. I have no problem when it’s actually a vintage move: HBK’s forearm, the facebuster by HHH, Old School etc. However, a move by Orton that he’s bene using for a few months at most? Give me a break. It’s a misuse of the word and insulting to my intelligence.

Cena hits You Can’t See Me, even though I can see him the entire time. This match is FLYING by. It feels like there was no intro or build and we’re already in the middle of it. That’s not good. FU doesn’t go and Orton hits a powerslam, called a scoop slam by Cole, to get back in control. They flat out say the WWE Title is the more valuable title. At least they admit it. Orton goes for the same knee and this time Cena gets out of the way. At least he’s intelligent.

I really don’t like this referee. He has that hitch in his count and it’s just aggravating. Orton hits that elevated DDT which I love as it’s a move that the ropes actually make better. Orton’s eyes really are great when he’s setting for the RKO. Facial expressions can make or break a match. Edge, Orton and Punk are some of the best there are at it. Punt misses and Cena hits the throwback. He hits the top rope legdrop about as well as he ever has, which is to say he actually connected with it.

Apparently Cena throwing his hands up and jumping up and down means FU now. It’s double clothesline time to make this a bit boring. Why is it only on a double clothesline that they’re devastating moves and not something that the guy pops up from? The fans seem confused as to who to cheer for. Orton shoves the referee, rolls to the floor and grabs his belt and leaves.

I say that as Lillian is on screen making me think I should rephrase that, but at the same time maybe I shouldn’t. Within seconds, she’s received word from Vince…but she trails off. She then announces Orton as the new champion, when she was supposed to say still champion. That’s a major mistake and I think it’s because they blew the spot and tried to do too much at once.

Cole tries to cover as fast as he can, and NOW we get the orders right as Vince has said that if Orton gets disqualified Cena wins the belt. More on that later. So the match is restarted and Cena is dominating. Orton goes to the floor and asks for the belt, which is dropped at first, and then he walks to the back saying that he’s done.

Ok, now we’re restarting it AGAIN, and now if he gets counted out we have a new champion. Ok, how in the HECK did she get word that fast? Both finishers are teased but Orton gets a roll up with his feet on the ropes to steal it.

OR DOES HE?

Another referee comes out and says that Orton has his feet on the ropes, so the original referee says this doesn’t count. Ok wait, back up. What about all the times when it’s said that the referee’s decision is final? If that’s the case, then one of two things should happen. #1, no match can end until the referee has had a chance to go back and rewatch the match, or #2, no decision is ever final since if the referee’s decision is final, then he could in theory go back and reverse it at anytime.

In other words, if the referee can reverse his own final decision, then couldn’t a referee go back and reverse something from years ago? If he has final say I don’t see why not. Guess what? It’s another restart. Best sign of the year: This is Why I Watch Smackdown. Preach it brother. STFU is put on and we get the rapidly becoming infamous moment as a “fan” (it’s Ted DiBiase’s brother Brett but that’s not revealed until tomorrow night) jumps into the ring.

Ok, reasons why this is clearly fake. #1, everything stops. In a real situation like this they just keep going. #2, they put the camera on the guy. That makes it fake as whenever this happens, the cameras go off and you can see the fans all watching the guy. #3, they talk about it. That NEVER happens.

#4, and most important of all, given the fact that the match has been restarted 3 times now, do you really expect this to be real? That was my biggest reason. It’s too unrealistic (and that’s saying a lot given this match) for it to have not been planned. Orton hits a quick RKO for the pin.

Rating: B-. For this rating, I’m factoring out all the insanity and I’ll explain why in just a second. Without all that stuff, this was a bad match. It was boring, it was very rushed, and it just wasn’t entertaining. However, I blame a lot of that on the booking, which is what killed this for me. The rating is fairly up there because a lot of the rhythm was taken away by stupid booking. Lillian messed up her lines, and that’s fine.

She had three freaking sets of them. This match suffered horribly from being overbooked. Why do you need the three restarts if you’re going to do the fan thing? Do one or the other, not four things. It’s too confusing, it takes too long, and it’s just stupid by the end. The fan run in thing would have been fine and actually pretty creative if not for the other three restarts.

Why do you need to have so much stuff in the world title match? It makes things look silly to me and it just makes thing far more complicated than they need to be. The match was bad, but the grade will be high because I think a lot of what was bad was based on the booking of the match and not what the wrestlers were doing. In essence, they had to remember four finishes. That’s asking too much of any wrestler and I think it had a lot to do with them not being that on here.

We recap the Punk/Hardy feud, which has been AWESOME.

Smackdown World Title: CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

This has been one of the best feuds in recent memory for a few reasons. One, it’s Punk at his best. Two, the clash is so natural that it’s great. Three, the matches have been great. It’s possible Hardy is done after this, so I’d expect a new champion. Punk lost the title to Hardy at Night of Champions in what I would call an odd choice after Punk delivered one of the best promos I’ve ever heard that had me cheering in my room.

Anyway, this is a TLC match, which actually plays into the two time MITB winner’s hands I’d think. Thankfully this has gone on last. Other than some lines from Ross about how Hardy is addicted to adrenaline, it’s a standard hard hitting spotfest that you’ve grown to know and accept in these places. Hardy has some mixed reactions here as I think it’s gotten out that he’s gone. Do announcers not pay attention?

Why are all ladders the biggest they’ve ever seen? Did you know Jeff is like smoke being poured through a keyhole? I’m not sure if you caught it the first 10,000 times Ross has said it. Yep and there it is the major spot, as Hardy, for about the fourth time in his career, goes to the huge ladder and hits the super swanton. Yeah it looks cool, but dang we’ve seen it way too many times. Why didn’t Punk move either?

He wasn’t tied down and it took Hardy longer than it takes him to smoke a bowl to get up there. More commentary problems as this is going on too. Hey, in case you didn’t see it, here’s 15 replays. Hardy is being taken out on a stretcher. I guess that’s how they’re ending him? Yeah that’s…different I guess. While this is happening, Punk starts climbing. Hardy pops up to go after him though.

I love the powers of recuperation that wrestlers have. Punk is hopping up the ladder and it’s just hysterical looking. He looks like a rabbit. Hardy takes a straight fall down off the ladder as Punk takes the belt to end the show. Sweetness indeed. The announcers of course try to make this out to be completely epic. JR sounds like he’s ordering dinner. Way to show emotion there buddy. No wonder you’re in the Hall of Fame.

Before we go though, the gong rings. Taker pops up from under the ring and chokeslams Punk, who is somehow STILL not being respected as champion. Yeah I don’t like this. Match was good though. Post match, a gong strikes. Taker pops up from under the ring and chokeslams the new champion to end the show.

Rating: A. This was a great match and a great way to end the show. It wasn’t complicated like the last show and to me shows why Smackdown is way ahead of Raw right now. This wasn’t all drama and over the top stuff. Sure it was a gimmick match, but it was about the match and not some big screwjob.

At the end of the day, the best way to get over and have a good match/feud is to have good action, not good stories. The last two matches are a classic example of that, and Smackdown did it right while Raw failed.

Overall Rating: A-. This was a VERY good show. It’s not great, but it’s close. The worst match of the night is Kane/Khali, but it’s at least watchable. They kept it short which was smart. The tag title wasn’t much but they kept JTG in there for the majority of the time which is certainly the right thing to do.

Other than that and the STUPID booking for the Raw title match, I really liked this show for one reason: it was about the in ring stuff. That’s the solution to any wrestling company’s problem. At the end of the day, have good matches and the fans will be happy. The matches were good and I’m very pleased with this show and it gets a big recommendation.

 

 

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Main Event – August 5, 2021: They’re Still At It

Main Event
Date: August 5, 2021
Location: Allstate Arena, Chicago, Illinois
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Byron Saxton

It can always be curious to see how a bit of a harsher crowd might react to a show like this one. Main Event is back to its old self as of late and that is not the most inspiring news. Hopefully this is the show that shakes things up again, as the show could already use another change. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Angel Garza vs. Lince Dorado

Yep, it’s Main Event all right. Garza doesn’t seem to think much of the LUCHA dance so he takes Dorado down by the wrist. That’s broken up with a flying mare and a hurricanrana sends Garza outside. Hang on a second though as Garza needs to hand a rose to a fan, allowing Dorado to get in another takedown. Back in and Dorado grabs a neck crank until Garza backdrops his way to freedom. Garza flapjacks him for two but he has to fight out of a cross armbreaker. A dropkick lets Garza TAKE OFF HIS PANTS, setting up a superkick and the Wing Clipper to finish Dorado at 5:38.

Rating: C-. This was a bit of a weird one as it is hard to get my mind around the idea of Dorado as a heel. It wasn’t a full on heel turn or anything close, but it was certainly more about having Garza as the focal point here. That should be the case on a bigger stage but for now, we’ll have to settle for Garza as the latest Main Event star.

We recap John Cena wanting to face Roman Reigns, who accepted a challenge from Finn Balor instead.

From Smackdown.

It’s time for the contract signing between Roman Reigns and Finn Balor for Summerslam. Sonya Deville and Adam Pearce are in charge, with Pearce saying he knows the fighting is coming. Balor and Reigns, with Heyman, come out, with Reigns insisting on sitting at the head of the table. Pearce asks Reigns to sign, but Reign gets cut off by the CENA chants. Reigns: “We’ve already seen Mr. Missionary tonight.” Reigns asks if Balor heard Cena’s opening promo tonight, because Reigns thought it was Cena saying he was better than Balor. Cena has to use old material while Balor is fresh and new.

Reigns signs, but promises to send Balor back to NXT. Balor says he can’t wait to go back to NXT as Universal Champion again. Balor goes to sign but here is Baron Corbin to jump him from behind. The beating is on and Balor is left laying. Corbin grabs the contract but here is Cena to take Corbin out before he can sign. Cena signs the contract with a blue Sharpie (McAfee: “THAT SIGNATURE IS AWESOME!”). Cole and McAfee question the legality of signing a contract like this as Reigns seethes.

From Raw.

Here are MVP and Bobby Lashley for a chat. MVP is glad to have the fans back and knows they are all excited to see Goldberg. A few weeks ago, Goldberg challenged Lashley for the WWE Title but Lashley has yet to acknowledge the challenge. Goldberg is a legend who can destroy any man on any night, but Lashley is not just any man. MVP asks how Goldberg wants to….and here’s Goldberg to cut him off. Goldberg asks Lashley what kind of a gladiator he is. The first time Lashley saw Goldberg, Lashley thought he was a victim. Fans: “WE WANT WYATT!”

Goldberg lives by the spear and at Summerslam, Lashley dies by the spear. Goldberg leaves so MVP goes out to get in the face of Goldberg’s son. That brings Goldberg back out and the spear drops MVP. Goldberg: “You mess with my son, I’ll kill you!” The fans did not care about Goldberg here and it’s kind of hard to disagree. This whole thing feels forced and there isn’t much of a way around it.

Jaxson Ryker vs. Cedric Alexander

Ryker shoves Alexander into the corner to start but Cedric looks like he is going to have some fun. You don’t do that to Ryker, who grabs a spinning slam and hits a running headbutt. Alexander gets tied in the Tree of Woe for some forearms to the chest, setting up a clothesline to the floor. Back in and Cedric manages a clothesline off the apron and we take a break.

Back with Cedric grabbing an armbar and shouting at the fans a lot. Some elbows to the face make it worse but Ryker is back up with a spinebuster. Cedric is right back with his own seated armbar but this time Ryker powers up for the running corner clotheslines. Alexander’s tornado DDT rocks Ryker, who comes back with the swinging Boss Man Slam for the pin at 8:42.

Rating: C. This was a better way to go for Ryker, who needs someone like Alexander to bump off of him. The problem for Ryker continues to be the same thing though: other than glaring at people and having an intense stare, there isn’t much to focus on. He can do one thing well and that’s about it, which is not going to last all that long.

From Smackdown.

Here is Bianca Belair for a chat. She is so proud of her 111 day Women’s Title reign and now she is happy to be back in front of these people. Belair can’t wait to see what the next 100 days have….and here is Carmella to cut her off. Carmella thinks she should get another shot because the lighting at Rolling Loud was messing her up.

Cue Zelina Vega to say Carmella is too pretty to be a three time loser. Vega gets in Belair’s face to say the people want to see a rising star get a chance. Belair accepts the challenge but Carmella jumps her from behind. Cue the returning Sasha Banks (not for the first time since Wrestlemania McAfee) for the save and a big hug to Belair. That’s probably Summerslam.

From Smackdown.

Sasha Banks/Bianca Belair vs. Carmella/Zelina Vega

Belair and Carmella start fast by running Carmella over. Carmella gets in a few shots on Banks in the corner as everything breaks down. They all head outside with Belair gorilla pressing Banks, climbing onto the steps, and then throwing her onto the other two. We take a break and come back with Belair fighting out of a full nelson but getting slammed down anyway.

Carmella stomps away in the corner and Vega cuts off another hot tag attempt. Vega’s Black Widow is broken up in a hurry and the hot tag brings in Banks. House is cleaned, including Three Amigos to Vega. The frog splash gets two with Carmella making the save. Carmella’s X Factor is countered into the Bank Statement for the tap at 8:42.

Rating: C. Just a quick match to get Banks back in the ring with a win. I’m not sure I buy the idea that Banks is going to be Belair’s new best friend, but that is one of the two default stories for women in WWE these days. Hopefully this gets rid of Carmella from the title picture for the time being, as that has been done for a while now.

Belair and Banks celebrate after the match….until Banks jumps her. The beating is on and the Bank Statement makes Belair tap. Banks picks up the title and then puts the Bank Statement on again to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. That’s how Main Event tends to go, as there was very little here worth seeing but it was good enough while it lasted. As usual focusing on Smackdown is a lot better than the Raw clips, but it wasn’t like the original stuff was worth seeing. Just another run of the mill Main Event, meaning it did help me remember what happened on the important shows.

 

 

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New Column: The New NXT

Rambling thoughts on the upcoming NXT changes, which might not be that bad.

 

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-next-nxt/




Monday Night Raw – March 12, 2007: Hey It’s The Rock

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 12, 2007
Location: Verizon Center, Washington DC
Attendance: 14,740
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We are less than three weeks away from Wrestlemania and it’s another Donald Trump show as the contract has to be signed. Other than that, the World Title situation has been picking up as you can feel the tension building between Shawn Michaels and John Cena. The shows have actually been working well as of late and that might be the case again this week. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Ernie Ladd.

We open with a recap of Shawn Michaels and John Cena not needing the other to save them, with Shawn barely saving Cena to end the show.

Here is John Cena to get things going. Cena knows there is tension in the air because he doesn’t know if he can trust Shawn Michaels. When is Shawn going to betray him and get it over with? If Shawn wants to turn on his tag partner then fine, but if Shawn wants to kick his teeth down his throat, come out here and do it right now.

Cue Shawn, but Cena cuts him off to say this is all about the title. Shawn says he isn’t going to win Good Samaritan this year because all he cares about is being WWE Champion. People have been asking when he is going to turn on Cena, but why aren’t people asking when Cena is going to turn on him? Cena will do anything to be champion and that’s what Shawn likes about him. As much as Cena wants to be champion, Shawn wants one more day in the sun that much more.

Violence is teased but here is Coach to interrupt. All this talk about the WWE Title has taken focus off of the Tag Team Titles and there are a lot of teams ready to take their heads off. That’s why tonight, it’s a gauntlet match against three teams. It seems to be three straight title matches, and the third is going to take place inside a steel cage.

Celebrities pick who they want to see bald.

Donald Trump arrives.

Money in the Bank Qualifying Match: Randy Orton vs. Carlito vs. Ric Flair

Elimination rules so Orton has to fight off a double team out of the corner. Back to back dropkicks put Carlito and Flair down but Flair is back up with the chops. Carlito does the same in the corner and gets two off a back elbow to the face. Flair takes out the knee and Carlito hits the springboard elbow. For reasons of good guys in wrestling are idiots, Carlito wants to put on the RKO so a fight breaks out with Flair. The Backstabber to Flair sets up the RKO for the elimination and we take a break.

Back with Carlito crawling to the ropes to get out of a Boston crab. That’s fine with Orton, as he gets in the Garvin Stomp into the jumping knee for two. Orton punches him down in the corner and we hit the chinlock. Carlito, eventually, fights up and snaps off a hurricanrana into a flapjack for two. The springboard spinning Swanton gets two but Orton crotches him on top. The RKO sends Orton to Wrestlemania.

Rating: C-. The elimination rule was little more than a way for Carlito to look like a moron, which he tends to do on his own. The Carlito/Flair stuff makes sense on paper, but then falls apart when you realize that it’s a story about Carlito. Orton going on makes sense as he needs something to do at Wrestlemania and he looked pretty dominant on the way there.

Video on Bobby Lashley vs. Vince McMahon.

It’s time for a Masterlock Challenge but no one comes out. Chris Masters offers Lilian Garcia a chance but here is Super Crazy for the save. Crazy gets in a few shots but gets Masterlocked down. This was every Masterlock Challenge for months now.

Vince McMahon arrives and tells Donald Trump’s driver to tell Trump that his is bigger than Trump’s. The limo that is.

Video on Ernie Ladd, who I like more and more every time I see something from him.

Edge and Randy Orton are getting ready in the back but stop to bicker about winning Money in the Bank. Edge is undefeated, but the only reason is he never faced Randy Orton.

Lilian Garcia asks us to look at the Titantron for a public service announcement. Someone is reading the Los Angeles Times and talking about the Battle of the Billionaires. The paper is folded down…..and it’s the Rock. Well that wakes the crowd up. Rock talks about being Samoan himself and knows that Umaga is Samoan for shriveled up monkey censored. How is Vince going to win with a shriveled up monkey censored? Rock hits some catchphrases and we’re done in a hurry. This was as fast paced of a cameo as you’re going to get.

Ashley had a Playboy signing in New York City.

Tag Team Titles: Gauntlet Match

John Cena and Shawn Michaels are defending in three straight matches. First up is the World’s Greatest Tag Team so Cena hiptosses and elbows Benjamin down to start. The release fisherman’s suplex gets two but Benjamin gets him into the corner for the tag to Haas. Some right hands and a slam set up more right hands but Cena runs him over. The hot(ish) tag brings in Michaels to clean house until Cena tags himself back in. The STFU, with a glare at Michaels, makes Haas tap.

Trevor Murdoch and Lance Cade are in next with an atomic drop/big boot combination to take over on Michaels. Murdoch’s slingshot knee gives Cade two and a jumping clothesline is good for the same. The bearhug doesn’t last long as Michaels punches his way out and hits an enziguri. Cena gets the tag and starts to wreck things, including the FU to Murdoch….at least in theory, as Shawn superkicks Murdoch for the pin instead. The cage is lowered and it’s MNM as the third challengers.

We’re joined in progress with Nitro getting two on Cena before grabbing the chinlock. That doesn’t last long as Cena is up in a hurry for another tag back to Michaels. Nitro takes Michaels down as well and it’s time for some choking. A neckbreaker gives Nitro two but the yet to be named Starship Pain misses.

Despite Mercury getting in a cheap shot on Cena, Michaels gets over for the tag anyway and it’s time to clean house. Everything breaks down and it turns into a contest to see who can abuse Mercury worse. Mercury is busted open but Michaels and Cena get into it again, this time over which finisher to use. Nitro gets dropped so it’s a superkick to send Mercury into the FU to retain.

Rating: C. This was little more than a workout for Cena and Michaels, as the other three teams just aren’t close to them. It took about six minutes to beat the first two and then not much more than that to take out MNM. The feud has been doing good things for Cena and Michaels but it has shown how weak the tag division is. Then again, that has been pretty clear for a long time now.

Post match the cage is raised and the other teams come in to go after Michaels and Cena. That’s fine with Cena, who grabs a chair to wreck everyone. Cena teases hitting Michaels but everything is cool and the champs leave everyone laying.

Jeff Hardy vs. Edge

Hold on though as Edge is in street clothes. He would love to come down and beat up Jeff Hardy but he isn’t wrestling in a city with a football team named after a racial slur. Replacement time, as Edge has a friend of Indian descent.

Jeff Hardy vs. Great Khali

Hardy isn’t sure about this but hammers away to no avail. Khali throws him down without much trouble, hits him in the head, and yells a lot. Cue Kane though…..and he has some meat hooks on a chain (his See No Evil weapon) so we’ll call it from here.

Post match Khali runs away from the threat of likely death so Kane uses the hooks to destroy the announcers’ table instead.

Donald Trump wants to know if Vince McMahon’s hair is fake.

Mr. Fuji is going into the Hall of Fame. Other than Billy Gunn and Kofi Kingston, he held a Tag Team Title longer than any man in company history so yeah, he belongs in there.

Mick Foley is proud of his new book, the Hardcore Diaries, and talks about some things he discusses, including Vince McMahon’s lack of creative genius and ECW. Cue Ashley, who offers a copy of Playboy for the book. Foley says he won’t look at the pictures because he can’t look at Ashley that way. As luck would have it, Foley has a page marked in his book about his thoughts on his co-workers in Playboy. He turns around to the open magazine and Ron Simmons comes in for his catchphrase.

We get a Battle of the Billionaires tale of the tape.

Vince is getting his hair ready and reminds the hairdresser that he is bigger than Trump. Coach comes in to praise Vince’s hair but Vince goes on a rant about how Coach’s bald head reminds him too much of Trump.

Melina vs. Torrie Wilson

Non-title. Torrie gets two off a bridging rollup, which has commentary rather approving. Another rollup gets another two as commentary talks about various magazines. Melina fights up but gets knocked down, allowing JR to mention that Torrie is from the potato state of Idaho. That’s enough for Melina, who grabs a rollup with trunks for the pin.

Post match the beatdown stays on until Mickie James runs in for the save, with Victoria right behind her. Melina is left alone so here is Ashley to beat her down instead.

Edge comes up to Vince McMahon in the back and offers to have Rated-RKO take care of Bobby Lashley on ECW. How about tomorrow, Lashley faces Randy Orton? If Orton can’t go though, he should be thrown out of Money in the Bank. Vince is good with that.

Here is Vince McMahon for the contract signing, though first he has to slip on the way into the ring. Vince talks about how Donald Trump won’t be able to get out of this one and brings out Umaga, with Armando Alejandro Estrada of course. There is no Trump though and Vince thinks it is due to cowardice.

The threat of a Billionaire B**** Slap brings out Trump, flanked by Maria and Candice Michelle. Trump: “Vince, your grapefruits are no match for my Trump towers.” He brings out Bobby Lashley (Trump: “Love you Bobby. Do we love Bobby? Do we love Bobby?”) and says these people seem to like him. Vince doesn’t care what the people or celebrities think and they both sign.

Cue Steve Austin to keep the star power and Vince’s panicking going. Austin asks the fans about their picks for the match before telling Trump that he is in his ring. Trump does nothing but tell people they’re fired, but don’t get on Austin’s bad side or he’ll take him out. Trump smirks it off so Austin goes over to Vince to ask about his problem with bald people (as we cut to Lashley and then back to Austin).

Vince isn’t happy so Austin grabs him by the tie and threatens various acts of violence. Austin leaves so Vince recaps everything again before leaving. Hold on though as Trump has something of his own: FAKE PHOTOS OF A BALD VINCE!!! Trump wants to fight Vince right now so Vince gets back in, only to be shoved over the table to end the show. This was the big angle of the night and while things are a bit different in hindsight, they knew what they had here and the money they made on Wrestlemania showed how right they were.

Overall Rating: C. This one is going to depend on how you look at it. While the wrestling itself was nothing memorable whatsoever, they’re in a bit of a unique spot. Wrestlemania is set and there is nothing else that really needs to be added. That means the rest of the time is going to be spent firming things up, hence the 20+ minute main event segment. The show isn’t very good on its own, but as part of the build to Wrestlemania, it worked rather well.

 

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2008 (Original): Summerslam Likes Double Main Events

Summerslam 2008
Date: August 17, 2008
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indiana
Attendance: 15,997
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker

Another year and here we are at the final Summerslam before this year’s installment. The main guys are still the main guys, except CM Punk is now the World Heavyweight Champion. The belts have switched again by the way. The real main event here is Batista vs. Cena but the match going on last is Taker vs. Edge in the Cell to finally blow off this feud.

They tried to make this show more of a dream card and I think to an extent it worked. HHH vs. Great Khali is the other title match and it’s gotten a lot of criticism, but I’ve always liked it. Since it’s been such a short time since this show, there’s only so much I can rant on here, but let’s get to it.

The theme of this show is the biggest blockbuster of the summer. This led to some creative ideas of various wrestlers in movie roles, with the best one being Jericho as Indiana Jones. The voiceover guy says there’s never been a box office bust. He never saw Summerslam 1995 did he? They play up Taker and Edge as the main event which is fine as it’s likely the bigger match. I’ll get to that later as it deserves a real tribute for one of the promos that was done about it.

Jeff Hardy vs. MVP

Jeff would be launched into the world title scene shortly after this, eventually getting the title in December. Needless to say, he’s ridiculously over. Ross says that Hardy gets a Michael Phelps like reaction. That’s just funny knowing what we know now about Phelps. MVP is still full heel here as he should be every time he’s in the ring. The set looks cool too as it looks like a movie marquee with the match that’s going on at the moment on it. I like that.

MVP is dominating this. Hardy has had next to no offense the entire match as it’s been all MVP since he hit a belly to belly suplex very early on which messed up Jeff’s neck and back. Since then, that’s all MVP has worked on. What a great concept. Someone hurts something and you go after it. Who would have thought of something like that?

There’s so much back and neck work here that it’s like I’m watching an Angle match. Hardy gets to the apron and tries a springboard move but MVP just punches him in the face. I freaking LOVE that. When all else fails, just hit him in the face.

MVP gets him down in the corner and sets up for the Drive By, but apparently his slapping the mat, posing and yelling allows Jeff to hear him coming and he avoids it. Jeff makes his comeback but as he’s going for the Bomb, Shelton runs out and Jeff dives on him. He misses the Swanton this time and MVP kicks him in the head for the pin. I don’t remember Jeff and Shelton doing anything.

Rating: B. This was a good match. The psychology was right there and MVP got the win which he needed far more than Hardy. Hardy just got beaten up in this match and he got beaten up badly, so that’s a perk. Either way, this was a good match with both guys looking solid. Why they never pulled the trigger on MVP I’m not sure.

Maria is an interviewer tonight I guess and is with Santino and Beth. This was when Santino was I guess at his peak and so of course the company decided to shove him down our throats. Beth looks ungodly hot here.

We have a poll about will Edge and Vickie divorce? Yes they would about 6 months later.

IC/Women’s Title: Mickie/Kofi vs. Beth/Santino

There’s a very simple concept here as Adamle was out of room on the card for both matches so he put them together and the winners leave with both titles. I love Kofi as the IC Champion. He was young, good, popular and in need of the push. What more can you ask for from the IC Champion? Mickie needs to wear white more often. The men can fight the women here. Beth beats up Mickie but she beats up Santino as spellcheck hates this match.

Kofi beats up the Italian so this is getting better all the time. Kofi is one of the few guys that can pull off the all yellow look. This is a lot of stalling until Kofi can kick it into high gear. Santino is pure comedy here, or at least an attempt at it. Mickie beats him up even more, but Beth catches Mickie with the Implant Buster or whatever it’s called to win it. Cole calls Beth he I think by mistake. Beth carries Santino out on her shoulders.

Rating: D. Not only was it boring but the booking was stupid. Oh yeah let’s take the belt off of a great choice in Kofi for the sake of comedy! Yeah the belt will be just fine. This was the beginning of the killing of the IC belt that it took Rey to save. I hated this, but Kofi and Mickie’s figure brings us back to a passing grade.

Buy the Hardy Boys DVD.

We hear about Shawn’s eye injury from the Great American Bash. More or less, he’s going to announce if he’s retiring or not here tonight. Jericho wants him gone. He was wrestling at house shows in between the PPVs, so obviously he wasn’t’ that hurt. Shawn comes out with his very hot wife named ReBECCA for this big announcement. She’s taller than he is. That’s just funny. This is going to be a long segment.

Shawn surprisingly says that he’s going to retire. Shawn thanks the fans and goes through all of his career highlights, including the screwjob and beginning DX. Geez his hair is falling out fast. As he’s thanking everyone, Jericho’s music kicks on. You know for someone that’s gotten rid of everything old, he’s sticking to that music like processed horse. Jericho says that he wants Shawn to admit that he’s quitting because of Jericho and not the eye injury.

Shawn says he’ll sit his kids and his wife down and admit that but Jericho has to sit his wife and kids down and tell them that he’ll never be Shawn Michaels. The crowd pops like crazy over that as this is one of the best segments I’ve ever seen. To up this even further, Shawn turns to leave but Jericho throws a punch that hits Shawn’s wife. Jericho leaves as Shawn is panicking. Everyone runs out to help her as Jericho leaves. The fans are eating this up with a spoon.

She sold it perfectly too so that’s helping a lot. This would lead to Shawn nearly killing Jericho at Unforgiven where Jericho would actually win the title, leading to the ladder match at No Mercy to finally end this feud.

Some movie is sponsoring this show.

ECW Title: Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry

Henry is champion here. He came over to ECW and just tore the place up, leading to this match. This is what I guess you could call the Michael Hayes Special. It was around this time that Hayes had used some racial slurs in the back and Henry complained about it. Soon therafter, Kofi won the IC Title, Shelton got the US Title and Henry the ECW Title. You might call it a coincidence, but it’s a bit too much for me to believe.

Henry even got the new belt because it didn’t fit around his overly large gut. He also has Tony Atlas with him here for no apparent reason. I think it was because Henry is horrible as a talker. We get the big fight introductions which never cease being cool. Bell rings and we’re off. Striker tells us who is who and what colors they’re wearing since we couldn’t tell that ourselves. Matt pops him with some punches but Henry just powers him to the corner.

Wait, Matt hits the Twist and goes for the cover? What the heck? Atlas pulls him out…and it’s a DQ in 30 seconds. Um, WHAT THE HECK? I know the Shawn segment was long but DUDE, you couldn’t fit in a three minute match before we do this? Oh that’s right. We had to have Santino celebrate instead.

Atlas beats on Matt but Jeff runs out and helps fight the two muscle guys off. Striker says the Hardys might be the best tag team in the last twenty years. Yeah, I’m not going near that one as it’s too easy to make fun of.

Rating: N/A. Really, what was the point of this? Matt would get the title the next month.

Ad for the Summerslam Anthology.

Same poll question is asked.

We get a recap of JBL vs. Punk. Punk won the title back in June in an epic moment, stealing the belt from Edge with the MITB contract. The problem was Punk was treated badly as champion, just as he was in his second reign. Think about it. This past reign he lost clean to Morrison twice. In the first reign, Batista won or barely lost at least once. Why can they not just give him a clean win? Maybe they will here, but over a weak opponent.

Raw World Title: JBL vs. CM Punk

Punk’s line of “some people like to refer to me as a fluke. I like to refer to myself as world heavyweight champion.” is just great. Punk gets a solid reaction during the intros. It’s not huge but it’s good. They talk about how this is a culture clash and they’re exactly right. I really like that actually as it’s definitely old school vs. new school as they say it is. For once they’re absolutely right. I love that suicide dive that Punk throws out a lot of the time.

They actually call JBL Bradshaw which I haven’t heard him referred to in forever. JBL tries a bearhug but it turns into a reverse waistlock. JBL is pretty bad at this point as his injuries were just getting to be too much for him. The main thing here is Punk’s ribs being worked on, which while a bit generic is something that works just about every time. Bradshaw’s style works well there so it’s not like he is doing something out of the ordinary.

A few submissions follow but surprisingly enough Punk wins a slug out. He hits a leg lariat but in an unplanned spot, JBL’s head slams into Punk’s which busts him open without cutting him. That was just painful looking. They hammer on each other a bit more, but Punk avoids a big power move to hit the GTS for a clean pin. I know that was short, but it wasn’t designed to be an epic match.

It was about 11 minutes and it made Punk look good as it was supposed to. He needed a clean win with the GTS to make himself look at least respectable. Lawler and Cole don’t do him any favors as they still talk about how he’s a fluke champion and a Cinderella story. Why do they need to do that? We get it, but the point of that match was to build him up a bit harder. Why mention what they were trying to overcome here?

Rating: B-. It was pretty generic at times, but it was certainly solid. JBL was doing what he was best at: slow methodical offense that made Punk look good when he came back from it. This was what Punk needed to make his reign a lot more credible: a clean pinfall victory over a big name. He would lose the title without being in the match next month due to the Scramble while JBL would move on to HBK after he got done with Jericho.

Khali is warming up in the back. That leads us to this recap. There wasn’t much of a story here other than Khali wanting a shot. The basic idea of this feud is simple: HHH can’t get the Pedigree on Khali.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Great Khali

The fans pop huge for HHH. Khali’s size is flat out scary. I’ve seen him at house shows and he’s just absolutely massive. We get a cool stat that the WWE Title has been defended 17 times out of 20 Summerslams but it’s only changed 3 times. That’s very impressive actually. One more time we get the big match introductions. Khali is booed pretty loudly. HHH is only 255 here so he’s slimmed down a bit. HHH is the faster guy here which isn’t something you see that often.

He goes for the Pedigree within 30 seconds which doesn’t hit. Less than a minute in Khali hits the double handed chokeslam and the vice. HHH becomes the first guy to escape that hold but it’s not him hogging the spotlight. He’s smart enough to kick the knees out, which plays to his being the Cerebral Assassin. That makes sense, so shut up HHH haters. Ok, we’ve been in this two minutes and Khali has used his three signature moves. That makes sense. MASSIVE you can’t wrestle chant.

Khali busts out a leg drop, so obviously he can wrestle, since that guy was an in ring general. The crowd isn’t convinced though as the chant starts again. It might be the neck grip that he’s using that doesn’t really cause a lot of pain I wouldn’t think. HHH gets the facebuster to lock Khali in the ropes.

Nothing comes of it though as he’s out very fast. Pedigree try #2 doesn’t work either. HHH is smart again as he goes for the knees. That’s the best thing to do against a guy this massive. He uses the vice again as this is very back and forth. The Game forces the hands off but they’re right back on again, and it’s knee time. The third time on the Pedigree works and HHH wins.

Rating: B+. Now a lot of people are going to say this match sucks, but I disagree. This is probably Khali’s best match ever, and I think a lot of the credit for that should go to HHH. The idea here was that HHH just had to survive until he could hit his one big home run move.

Once he got that the match was going to be over and that’s exactly what happened. That makes perfect sense. The whole match was about him trying to hit the Pedigree and when he did it won the match. What more can you ask for out of something like this? There’s only so much you can do with Khali, so they did the best they could, and it worked out very well to me.

We get the recap of Cena vs. Batista, which the more I think about it, the more I like the short buildup. This match was based on two titans clashing and that’s all there needed to be. Cena’s One Day promo is something I really like.

More or less what he says is that despite all the years of him being the supposed biggest thing in the company, Batista got all the accolades and that one day, they would have their showdown. When you hear Cena talk, you have to give him this: he admits he has faults, unlike someone like Hogan who just screams about how great he is. It’s nice to hear both sides of it for a change.

John Cena vs. Batista

Big staredown before the bell and it’s on. This definitely has the big fight atmosphere and it’s working perfectly. You may no like either guy but you can’t argue that this is the biggest match the company had for a long time. Seeing this as one of the main events at Wrestlemania is still just awesome looking. Batista Bomb is avoided early as it’s kind of a long feeling out process to start.

Release fisherman’s suplex gets two for Cena as I have a feeling a strong style is coming. Side slam by Batista gets two. FU is blocked and Big Dave goes for the knee. Batista gets a figure four as the fans all go WOO as you would think two people just kissed on a sitcom. After a rope is grabbed Cena hits the FU on Batista but it’s over the top rope so we kind of hit a break.

Here come the shoulders and the Protoplex sets up the 5 Knuckle Shuffle. Since it’s a freaking punch though Big Dave pops up and kicks Cena’s head off so that both guys are down. Big spinebuster by Batista but the Batista Bomb is countered into the STFU that has ZERO pressure on the neck or upper body at first. The fans boo the heck out of this.

The positioning of the knee in this hold is always freaky looking to me and looks horrendous every time. A rope is almost grabbed but Cena pulls them back to the center. He’s been in it nearly a full minute now but FINALLY the rope is grabbed. FU is blocked again into a rear naked choke of all things by the Animal. The good thing here is you get a closeup of the arm and it’s not fully on so there is a legit reason for Cena not dying.

After elbows get Cena out of the hold a BIG OLD SPEAR puts him down. Sometimes there’s nothing better than a big old tackle. Batista goes for a powerslam but Cena counters like people counter Tombstones into a BIG FU for a long two. Fans are WAY into this too.

Cena goes up top but Batista goes up too and we slug it out on the buckle. Nice place for the boo/yay spot. Cena shoves him off but goes for the leg drop into the powerbomb which more or less snapped his neck after it was already hurt and put him out for three months until the biggest shock in like ever as he was #30 in the Rumble. Somehow it gets two so Batista hits one of the biggest Batista Bombs ever ends this clean.

Rating: A. This was the super match that everyone wanted to see and it was a great one. Both guys were spot on to say the least. Batista gets an unfair reputation as being bad, but when it’s a big match, he brings it. The ending of this match was excellent, with neither guy being able to do it. I don’t like the strong style like that being used that often, but when it’s done right, it’s a thing of beauty.

The ending with Batista just losing it and beating Cena down until there was no way he was getting up was great as it plays up to the Animal theory. This was a showdown that lived up to the hype and left the door open for the Mania rematch that we know is coming one day. This loss does something else: it keeps Cena human.

He’s dominated everyone, but there’s one man that he just can’t beat: Batista. It gives him something to shoot for. He lost the Rumble to him in 2005 and he lost here as well. That’s a great touch indeed.

The poll results say that Vickie and Edge will divorce.

The Cell is lowered and the fans pop huge. This is the newer model of the cell which is less wide but taller, making it look more like a cell than a cage. We get the recap for the feud. It started with Taker going after the title and beating Edge at Mania. Edge cheated on his wife later on, resulting in her punishing him with the Cell match upon Taker’s return from suspension.

The title aspect of the feud was long over by this point, so this was a bit weird for a choice. Before the show though, Edge and Foley cut an in ring promo where Foley said that Edge wasn’t the same guy he used to be and that Edge would get killed if he didn’t change. It was probably the best promo of the year and was absolutely great to say the least.

Hell in a Cell: Undertaker vs. Edge

Both guys are well received, but of course Taker gets the mega pop as he’s beyond legendary status at this point. We start with a fistfight and of course Taker dominates. He hits a SWEET kick to the face to get a real advantage. Taker always gets insane out there and it’s great every time. His most famous moment has to be throwing Foley, so if nothing else consider that for his stuff in here.

They’re already on the floor and have spent more time there than they did in the ring. Stairs are brought into the ring so we’re going hardcore already. Taker hits Snake Eyes onto the stairs but Edge blocks it I guess as he really isn’t hurt by it. Spear is hit into the steps, (granted Taker is sitting up against them so it’s more like a running shoulder block) so they’re saying screw the thought process I guess.

Oh look it’s a table, so I guess this is the hardcore cell now? Another table is leaned against the cage. We have a double stack of tables on the floor. I’m curious to see how that’s going to work as there’s far less room between the cage and the ring than there used to be. Edge gets a chair so we’re up to three different weapons in less than ten minutes. At least they’re staying true to the original concept. I hate changes to a match like this.

You can hear the fans chanting Edge so even back then he had a lot of fans. It’ll be good for him to come back as a face. He’s a great heel, but it’s not going to kill him to change a bit. Sick chair shot to Taker as Edge is completely in control here, which I think I expected him to be. This isn’t your standard HIAC match yet though as it’s been more of a hardcore match in a cage, which I don’t think I like that much. And now we have a ladder.

They had a TLC match already, so I guess they need one in a cage too? We get a ton of weapons shots but it ends with Edge trying a conchairto that Taker just sits up and chokes him to escape and take back over. Back on the outside, Taker just kills Edge with the steps. The sound on this was just great. Edge of course is back on offense in about 8 seconds and he spears Taker through a section of the Cell which crashes down onto the table.

It wasn’t as cool as when Lashley did it to Umaga, but it certainly wasn’t bad. Now they’re on the floor in front of the cage. You know, I don’t remember if there’s ever been a Cell match that stayed in the cage. It’s almost a running joke. Again, there’s only so much I can make fun of here as it’s been an intense, well fought match. Edge runs across some tables and spears him through the ECW table which has replaced the Spanish Announcer Table as the destroyed furniture of choice.

Taker pops up of course and is now dominating. The no selling is getting to be very annoying now. They’re back in the cell now with Edge beating on him with the ladder as the Home Depot main event continues. We see Vickie and the remnants of La Familia, the worst stable in recent history, looking on. The commentators try to figure out if they’re happy or not. Well they’re not clapping their hands, so if they’re happy they don’t know it. Edge brings in a camera so maybe it’s a Staples match.

Taker avoids the spear and chokeslams Edge for a long two. Jim Ross must be the Chris Berman of wrestling with all of these annoying nicknames for people. Also, why does he have to keep referring to the cell like it has thoughts of its own? Is this a wrestling match or a Stephen King story? Edgecution which is called the Impaler, which needs to come back. It’s such a better move than the spear which a lot of people use and he’s not that good at it either.

Taker sets for the Last Ride through the double stack of tables on the outside but takes a spear instead. They say that Taker has had more issues dealing with Edge than anyone else. I think Kane and Foley would disagree. Also the fact that he never beat Bret Hart could be a factor in there. Last Ride gets two. Ross gets the great line of Last Ride means Last Rites. If you thought I was being legit there, you need help.

Edge is pretty much dead at this point but he comes back long enough to hit an Edge-a-Matic on the stairs to make ANOTHER comeback out of the Tombstone. Ross points out that Taker isn’t standing. That’s another line that I don’t even need to make fun of. Edge tries Old School. Now, let’s count how many ways this is going to not work. Well, Taker chokeslamming him through the two tables outside would be the best way I guess, and that’s what he does.

Tazz says that Edge looks like he fell off of a building. Actually I’d say he looks like he got chokeslammed off of the top rope through two tables inside a Hell in a Cell cage by the Undertaker at Summerslam 2008, but keep in mind I’m not a professional. How many buildings do you know of that have tables stacked up on the ground outside of them? Back in the ring, Edge gets speared as Taker shows how you steal a move.

It was B+A while in special mode on No Mercy for those of you interested. He follows this up with a SICK camera shot to Edge’s head. Dang this is more of a slaughter than he should have gotten in the WZ Tournament this year. Conchairto is next, as Edge never should be able to wrestle again. The tombstones finishes this absolute massacre. La Familia is applauding. Taker walks up the aisle but turns around and comes back.

Ok, I’m not huge on Edge, but dang it let the man live. He gets the ladder which isn’t much taller than Taker is actually. He stands Edge up on it so it’s like he was climbing and fell asleep. Taker gets another ladder next to it as I’m not sure what he’s setting for. He chokeslams Edge through the ring to FINALLY end the show.

OR DOES HE???

Taker gets on his knees and raises his arms, as fire stars shooting out of the hole. JR says where Taker sent Edge. Oh man it why did they have to go there? Yeah, that hurt things a LOT.

Rating: A-. I’m not wild on the weapons in there. The idea of the Cell is to have it be enough to hurt people. More or less you had a TLC match in the cage, which both worked and didn’t work at the same time. On one hand, you had an incredibly violent match with a definitive winner of the feud in Taker, but you also had a lot of clutter in there.

I think the weapons could work but they just used FAR too many of them. The fire at the end was just stupid. So wait, Edge is there now? If so, then why was he back on TV a few months later completely fine? See why it makes NO FREAKING SENSE???

Overall Rating: A-. A very solid show here, as there’s just one bad match and one headscratcher in the double title match. Other than that, this is a very good show. Your two non title matches are both great, the world title matches are solid, and you have a solid segment.

The only thing I think that’s missing would be the match with Hardy and Henry. Why not have like 3 minutes worth instead of 30 seconds? Were they running so close to the time limit that they couldn’t spare two minutes or so? Either way, this was a great show and one of the better ones I’ve seen.

 

 

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Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2007 (2013 Redo): Welcome Back And So Long

Summerslam 2007
Date: August 27, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Joey Styles, Taz

It’s still an awkward period for the company as there isn’t much going on and they’re sort of just going through the motions. The big things tonight are the rise of Randy Orton and the return of HHH to face King Booker in the Game’s first match since December. Other than that there’s nothing noteworthy on the show. It’s just such a dull time for the company and it shows in their major events. Let’s get to it.

The opening video comes off like a long TV show intro. Mysterio is back tonight and Batista gets another world title shot. The main event is covered a bit as well and they get ready to throw it to the arena but the video is hijacked by a $6 Million Man bit about rebuilding HHH. He’s already hijacking things.

Kane vs. Finlay

Kane has banged up ribs due to a recent attack by Finlay. Apparently Finlay knocked some coffee onto Kane and didn’t apologize. I’ve heard worse reasons for a brawl. Kane starts fast and uppercuts Finlay down in the corner and drops him with a back elbow to the jaw. The ribs are already bothering the big bald but he pops Finlay in the chin with more uppercuts. Finlay gets a boot up in the corner but Kane pops him with a right hand so hard it sends him to the floor.

Back in and Finlay gets in a shot to the bad ribs to knock Kane to the outside. A backsplash to the bad ribs is good for two and Finlay puts on a half crab. This has been very physical so far. Kane finally powers up and hits an enziguri to escape. A big boot drops Finlay and some clotheslines in the corner stagger him. Kane hits a one armed side slam which is a bit of a stretch given the rib injuries. JBL is doing a great job on commentary here, talking about how a rib injury affects how you move in the ring.

The top rope clothesline connects but he can’t follow up. Kane misses a charge in the corner and gets dropped by a clothesline. Cue Hornswoggle who runs from Kane, allowing the big man to hit a big boot on Finlay. Horny is thrown back inside but shoved down. Kane tries the chokeslam on Finlay but the ribs give out, allowing Finlay to hit a DDT for two. In a classic heel move, Finlay goes to unhook the buckle and uses the distraction to go for his club but the referee catches him. Horny throws in another club but Kane kicks out at two. Finlay misses a charge into the corner and the chokeslam is good for the pin.

Rating: B-. That’s probably high but I was really liking this match. It was a good choice for an opener with both guys working hard and pounding on each other with some solid force. The fans were into it too and popped quite well for almost everything in there. Kane sold the ribs well and the fans liked his comeback. Nice choice for an opener here.

All the GM’s are in the back at a party when Vince comes in and wants to know why there are no women here. That’s a good question actually. Vince says the mother of his illegitimate son will be here tonight. Santino comes in and suggests he’s the illegitimate son but Regal yells him away. MVP comes in as well to complain about Teddy Long and issue an open challenge to Matt Hardy for anything other than a wrestling match. He leaves and Regal suggests that he himself is the son. Now Regal leaves and Coach suggests it might be Regal, but Vince apparently doesn’t like English women.

Rey Mysterio is coming back! Tonight! Why did we need a promo for this?

Intercontinental Title: Mr. Kennedy vs. Carlito vs. Umaga

No real story here other than Umaga is defending and these two are at the Intercontinental level. Kennedy tries to negotiate and gets punched in the face by Umaga. Carlito loads up the apple but gets punched as well, giving the champion complete control so far. The challengers fall out to the floor and finally start going after Umaga at the same time, though it has the same result. Carlito gets in a cheap shot from behind to send Umaga to the floor and Kennedy rams the champion into the steps.

Back in and Carlito gets two off a rollup but gets caught using the ropes. Everyone in this is either a heel or close enough to call them one. Carlito hits a springboard back elbow to the jaw for two on Kennedy but gets caught in a Stroke for no cover. Instead Kennedy goes after Umaga but gets pulled to the floor instead of getting in a cheap shot. Umaga hits a middle rope headbutt on Carlito but Kennedy saves Carlito from a charging Samoan.

Carlito knocks Kennedy to the floor and gets two on the champion before asking for an alliance with Kennedy. The champion won’t be double suplexed but easily hits one on the other guys. Umaga is back up first to clean house and a spinning Rock Bottom gets two on Kennedy. A superkick puts Carlito in the corner and a running hip attack crushes him again. Kennedy sends Umaga to the floor and hits a rolling senton on Carlito, only to have Umaga come back in with the Samoan Spike on Kennedy for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match wasn’t bad but this could have been on any given episode of Raw. Umaga was fine for a monster and would soon be slain by Jeff Hardy. Kennedy was supposed to be in a huge story coming up but a Wellness violation derailed those plans. As for Carlito…..there’s just nothing interesting to say about him. He exists and that’s about it.

Undertaker is coming back. Again. Seriously there’s at least a five hour DVD of just his returns.

We recap Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero. This time it’s a more standard story: Chavo is jealous of Rey’s success and injured Rey’s knee, setting up this match for revenge. Chavo even dressed up as Rey and wrestled a match to destroy a jobber’s knee.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

For some reason Rey’s torso is covered in silver paint. The fans are all over Chavo to start as you would expect. The heel goes right after the knee of course but Rey slips away before the damage can be done. They do the gymnastics routine out of a test of strength as the fans chant for Eddie. Rey’s paint is already coming off, making him look really stupid. Chavo tries to bend the knee around the ropes but is sent to the floor for a big dive from Mysterio.

Back in and Rey goes up but gets caught in the Tree of Woe which is similar to what hurt his knee in the first place. Guerrero goes right for the knee and asks him if he quits. Off to the Brock Lock (Chavo bends the knee around his neck) but Rey counters into a headscissors. Chavo stays on him though and hooks another leg lock until Rey FINALLY gets out with a kick to the head.

He tries for 619 but the leg gives out, allowing Chavo to put on a half crab. Mysterio finally gets to the ropes but the knee is still too hurt to follow up. This time it’s Chavo going up but getting pulled down into the Tree of Woe so Rey can go after the knee. The paint is entirely off Rey’s chest now, making it look like he’s been fixing up his house.

Rey hits a seated senton off the apron before hitting a hard kick to the head for two. Chavo catches a springboard moonsault press but gets countered into a tornado DDT for two. Chavo comes right back with a Gory Bomb for two followed by two of the Three Amigos. Rey spins out of the third and takes Chavo into the ropes for the 619 and the springboard splash for the pin.

Rating: C-. The match was ok but at the end of the day there was no doubt that Rey was winning at all. It wasn’t boring but I liked last year’s action more. The story this year was better, but the paint and the obvious ending didn’t do it any favors. Chavo doesn’t work that well as a heel whatsoever.

King Booker says he’ll beat HHH tonight. That’s hilarious.

Divas Battle Royal

Beth Phoeix, Torrie Wilson, Victoria, Layla, Brooke, Kelly Kelly, Kristal Marshall, Michelle McCool, Mickie James, Jillian Hall, Melina, Maria

The winner gets a title shot at Candace Michelle at some point in the future and you don’t have to go over the top rope. It’s a Divas battle royal so you know this is going to come down to about three people as potential winners. It’s a huge brawl to start with Brooke (Miss Tessmacher) being sent out early. Jillian Hall eliminates Maria and those great little shorts of hers. Layla, who looks much better with curly hair, is out and the loud screaming continues.

Kristal actually knocks Victoria out and Michelle puts Kristal out a few seconds later. Kelly is thrown out and Mickie helps Michelle eliminate Jillian. Melina dumps Mickie and we’re down to Torrie, Melina, McCool and Phoenix. Melina screams a lot and takes Torrie down but gets clotheslined out by Michelle. Torrie and McCool go after Beth but Wilson is quickly tossed. Beth easily tosses for the win.

Rating: D. There’s just NOTHING to talk about in these things. It’s all about the girls looking good and while that worked, it doesn’t make for an interesting eight minutes of “action.” Beth would go on to dominate the division for several years as the wrestling was phased out in favor of models who MIGHT wrestle a match here or there. Then they brought in a second belt for some reason that didn’t work. Less than nothing of value here, other than looks.

Here’s MVP for his challenge to Matt Hardy as Beth’s music is still playing. He says no one bought a ticket to see the girls (likely true) so here’s the US Champion to entertain you. MVP talks about growing up drinking beer but now he drinks the finer beverages. Tonight though, he’s lowering himself to challenge Matt to a beer drinking contest. This was the latest in a LONG series of challenges before these guys actually had a match. It went on for over six months before Matt actually won the title at Backlash. They would even win the Smackdown Tag Titles in a few days.

Anyway Matt comes out for the contest and sounds drunk before the first can is opened. Matt says MVP isn’t better than anyone and is proud to be a common man. He knows he can out drink MVP, but tonight he isn’t going to try. A few weeks back MVP brought in a substitute for a boxing match against Hardy: former world champion Evander Holyfield.

The fans immediately get what’s going on and here’s Austin to drink for Matt instead. Gee good thing he was in the building and Matt knew it would be a beer drinking contest. Cole says this is fair. JBL: “THIS IS NOT FAIR! EVANDER HOLYFIELD IS JUST EVANDER HOLYFIELD!!! THAT IS FREAKING STONE COLD!” Austin does warmups before the contest and Stuns MVP before they drink the first beer. It’s hard to argue with these nostalgia moments as the fans went NUTS for Austin.

Wrestlemania 24 is in Orlando.

Cryme Tyme comes in to see the GM’s and Vince and suggest they might be Vince’s son. They start talking about that money money yeah yeah and since this is WWE, it turns into a dance off with Regal stealing the show as always. Cue Ron Simmons for the obvious punchline.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

Morrison is defending, having taken the title from Punk at Vengeance in what was supposed to be Benoit winning the title. John is freshly changed over from Johnny Nitro so he’s still rocking the poetry. Punk takes him down by the legs to start but John has him in a chinlock a few seconds later. They trade hiptosses until Punk slams him down to take over. Punk dropkicks Morrison down onto the apron but John blocks a suplex back in with a neckbreaker onto the apron.

Morrison pounds away at Punk and puts on something vaguely resembling a Tazmission. A knee to the ribs gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. Back up and Punk misses the backfist but gets two off a rolling sunset flip out of the corner. A spinning cross body out of the corner gets the same and there’s the running knee I the corner. The bulldog, of course, doesn’t work but a powerslam gets another near fall for Punk.

Morrison comes right back with a backbreaker and neckbreaker for two but CM counters the flip neckbreaker (Morrison’s finisher) into a clothesline. A moonsault of all things gets two for Punk and he crotches John on the top rope. Punk clotheslines him down for two and a high kick has Morrison in trouble, but he manages to block a middle rope hurricanrana and put his feet on the ropes to retain.

Rating: C. Again this match could have been on any given episode of ECW on Sci-Fi, which is exactly where it was when Punk won the title nine days later. Why they didn’t just do that here is anyone’s guess, but I don’t think anyone really gave much thought to what was going on with ECW anyway. The match was pretty good but it needed more than seven minutes.

We recap HHH vs. Booker, which doesn’t have much of a story to it. King Booker was going after Lawler and Ross for not respecting him enough and HHH, noted defender of the little guy, is coming back to defend their honor. The hook is King vs. King but in other words, HHH is returning from injury and we need to feed him someone with some credibility.

HHH vs. King Booker

HHH’s return is of course over the top and not as good as the one in 2002. Booker gets in a cheap shot to start but HHH comes back with right hands. A clothesline puts Booker on the floor and a second clothesline does the same. Back in and Booker gets in some forearms but walks into the facebuster for two. Queen Sharmell finally helps her man out and Booker goes after the injured leg.

HHH counters a slam and takes out Booker’s leg before putting on a Figure Four. Sharmell interferes again to break the hold and a quick kick to the face gets two for Booker. Back up and they slug it out with HHH taking over by sending Booker to the floor. HHH whips Booker into the steps and gets caught in a spinebuster back inside for two. The Pedigree is escaped and the Book End gets two. The Houston Hangover misses though and the Pedigree is good for the pin.

Rating: D+. One former world champion squashed, dozens to go. HHH is back and the match was never in doubt at all. The match wasn’t even eight minutes long and yet again Booker looks like a goon against HHH, albeit with roles reversed from Wrestlemania XIX. Nothing to see here and HHH didn’t look like anything great.

We recap Batista vs. Khali but there isn’t much to say. Khali won the title in a battle royal due to Edge being injured. Batista challenged him to try to slay the beast. Khali is using a vice grip around this time.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. Great Khali

Khali immediately takes him into the corner and chops him down. Some elbows to the head put Batista down again and there’s a hard clothesline for good measure. All champion so far. Batista falls down to the floor and gets back in for the big chop for two. Big Dave is sent shoulder first into the corner and there’s a nerve hold to really keep up the suck. The hold stays on for over a minute and a half, drawing a boring chant.

Batista finally hits a jawbreaker but Khali chops him down for two. Cole even acknowledges the boring chant. Batista blocks the vice grip to finally wake the crowd up a bit before hitting a spinebuster. The champion escapes the Batista Bomb and catches him coming off the middle rope in the Punjabi Plunge for two. Then to really screw over the fans, Khali’s manager sends in a chair and Khali whacks Batista for the DQ.

Rating: F. Oh come on. They’ve GOT to be screwing with us right? This wasn’t even seven minutes long and over a minute and a half of that was in a nerve hold. The fans were absolutely right in booing the match but the worse sign is they cheered for the comeback. It was clear they cared about Batista and wanted to see him win but the solution is to make them wait so Batista could win the title next month in a stupid three way.

Batista destroys Khali with the chair post match. Even JBL rips into Khali for such a lame ending.

Vince and Coach are wondering where the aforementioned woman is when Regal pops in to say she’s here. Say it with me: here are Mae and Moolah. Apparently Mae wants to give Vince another illegitimate son and you know what’s coming: Mae nearly molests Vince to death until Regal and Coach drag her off. Vince seems to like it. COMEDY!

We recap the main event. Cena has been champion for eleven months and Orton has been rising up the card as the legend killer. He was named #1 contender on Raw and spent the next several weeks RKOing Cena.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

They lock up to start with Cena taking over via a headlock. A hard shoulder puts Orton down and the fans aren’t pleased at all. Cena takes him down with a headlock takeover but Orton fights up quickly. Back up and Orton hits a shoulder and headlock takeover of his own to take over. The fans hate Cena as he tries to grab the STFU but Orton makes it to the rope and pops Cena in the face to a big reaction. Orton was a mega heel coming into this match so the fans cheering him is very bizarre.

Orton pounds away even more but Cena comes back with a bulldog for two. A forearm to the back of John’s head puts him right back down for two though and momentum shifts again. Cena tries a leapfrog but Orton stops on a dime and blasts him in the head instead. Randy knocks him from the apron onto the announce table as the head trauma continues. Back in and Orton takes Cena down with a chinlock as the champion is in trouble.

Randy even lays on his back to crank even more but Cena fights up again, countering with a belly to back suplex to put both guys down. Back up and Cena misses a charge, going head first into the buckle to shake up the head again. Orton stomps away on Cena including a hard shot to the back of the champ’s head. A knee drop misses Cena’s head but Orton takes him down with a powerslam for two.

Back to the chinlock for a bit before Orton snaps off a gorgeous dropkick for two. We hit chinlock #3 but this time the suplex is countered into a headlock takeover to keep Orton in control. Orton hooks a bodyscissors to go with the chinlock but John fights to his feet and powers out of the hold before initiating his finishing sequence. The ProtoBomb puts Orton down but the Shuffle is countered by Orton’s over the back backbreaker. Orton’s Elevated DDT (Cena’s feet hanging on the middle rope) gets a very close two count and Randy is getting a look in his eyes.

Orton’s RKO (jumping cutter) is countered but Cena charges at Randy, only to go sailing over the top and out to the floor. Randy rams him into the steps and Cena is in big trouble. Back in and Cena gets in a quick shot to stagger Orton but gets crotched as he goes up. A superplex is blocked though and Cena hits the top rope Fameasser, but Orton blocks the FU. A shot to the head puts Cena down again but his running punt to the head misses. There’s the STFU but Randy grabs the rope. Back up and the RKO takes Cena down for two. They get up again and the FU hits to retain Cena’s title.

Rating: B-. While this wasn’t the epic showdown they were hoping for, it definitely was a good fight. Orton going after Cena’s head and not worrying about the consequences for the sake of winning the title made him seem ruthless but Cena never giving up was exactly what you would expect from him. Good stuff here but not great.

Overall Rating: D+. The show isn’t bad but I’m looking for more out of Summerslam than this. Orton vs. Cena was the match of the night and that’s just ok. That’s the best way to sum up most of these matches: just ok. Only two matches crack nine minutes here and that’s just not enough time for a lot of them. The show isn’t worth seeing, but brighter days were ahead.

Ratings Comparison

Kane vs. Finlay

Original: C

Redo: B-

Carlito vs. Mr. Kennedy vs. Umaga

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

Original: B-

Redo: C-

Divas Battle Royal

Original: F

Redo: D

CM Punk vs. John Morrison

Original: B+

Redo: C

HHH vs. King Booker

Original: B-

Redo: D+

Great Khali vs. Batista

Original: D-

Redo: F

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original: B

Redo: B-

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D+

DANG I liked this way too much the first time.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/10/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2007-hhh-is-back-again/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.




Summerslam Count-Up – Summerslam 2007 (Original): They’re At It Again

Summerslam 2007
Date: August 26, 2007
Location: Continental Airlines Arena, East Rutherford, New Jersey
Attendance: 17,441
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, JBL, Joey Styles

Well, it’s somewhat different this year but not by a lot. For one thing, Cena is the undisputed top guy in the company now, even surpassing HHH and Batista. HHH has been out of action since the Fall after tearing his quad again, and tonight is his epic return facing Booker T for no apparent reason other than he’s a big name for HHH to beat on. Your main event is Cena vs. Orton for the title, so you can really see how much difference two years makes.

I mean seriously, Cena was champion two years ago, so it’s not like they’re doing the same thing this year or anything. This was at the beginning of Orton’s rise to being one of the top dogs in the company as he is at the moment. He’d go on to win the title in about two months.

On the Smackdown side, we have Batista vs. Khali. I don’t even need to make fun of that yet. Finally, the ECW Title has become much closer to what it is today, as we have Morrison vs. Punk for the belt. Also, this is about two months after the Benoit tragedy, and I’m going to leave it at that.

It’s the 20th Summerslam and we see the logos from all of the previous shows. That’s cool as I’ve been through them all recently so it’s like going through a photo album. They talk about how this is Rey’s return and the two world title matches, and then it happens. The screen flickers and we cut to an intro that’s designed after the 6 Million Dollar Man as this whole thing becomes about HHH.

They talk about how Booker comes to Raw and this is apparently over who the real king is. Well at least they have a story behind it. Booker would be gone within two months and in TNA within three months. It’s a good video, but HHH should not be placed above the two title matches, period.

Oh dang it I forgot about this horrid theme song. It’s by some annoying hip hop singer and it just sounds completely out of place. Wrestling is supposed to be about rock and roll, not bad hip hop/pop music.

We intro the show with all three commentary teams. JR and Lawler more or less say they know Booker has absolutely no chance at all.

Kane vs. Finlay

As best I can tell, Kane is the face here. Finlay only weighs 233lbs? Wow that’s weird. This was around the time that Finlay did nothing but hit people with his stupid club. The crowd is popping for Kane so I’ll bet on him as the face. They talk about how Kane is being pushed at the moment, even being credited with injuring Edge. For the life of me I don’t get why Kane has never gotten a world title reign that’s more than a single day.

With some of the people that have been given the belt, you can’t tell me that a guy that’s been around 12 years and has jobbed to everyone asked of him shouldn’t get a world title reign with some length. I’m not suggesting he headlines Wrestlemania, but would it hurt to let him hold it for 2-3 months or even a single month? Dreamer did it and Kane is a far bigger name and star than Dreamer is. Put the title on Kane for a bit. It’s not like he’s Barry Horowitz or something.

Yes I’ve always been a bit of a Kane mark. Kane’s ribs are hurt here as the big white tape implies, but it’s not really clear. He’s only got about 10 inches of tape. If he wants it to be clear it has to be 11 inches. Oh crud it’s the leprechaun. He’s the Cruiserweight Champion here too. It’s sad that a belt that was an integral part of WCW’s rise to prominence is now a horrible prop for a guy like this.

Why is this guy still doing this two years later. It’s just completely stupid. Anyway he causes Kane to get distracted but Kane fights back, but the ribs keep him from using the chokeslam. This crowd is way hot. Oddly enough, even though Kane couldn’t get Finlay up earlier, after another club to the ribs he CAN get him up, which is enough for the pin.

Rating: C. There we have it. The official modern starting system for PPVs is now in place, as we have a rather pointless match opening the show rather than something fast paced and exciting, because there’s just no room on the card for anything else. This is why the WWE’s PPVs aren’t as interesting to me anymore.

There are three matches now that have to be built up as main event level matches along with any other major match on the card, and it leaves no room for filler or just a good match that gives the audience a chance to look at an up and coming star.

If you have two 15-20 minute world title matches, that’s two 7-10 minute midcard matches that you can’t have, taking away at least 4 wrestlers’ chance to show what they can do on a major show. Instead we have feuds like this that go nowhere between two guys that don’t need this time. It’s the problem with the triple brands as well as the problem with having only one company, as none of these people could just be let go.

In the back, Coach is with Armando, Regal and Teddy, the three GMs. Vince comes in and asks why is there a party with all men? He asks them to find the mother of Hornswoggle, or at least the person that would later be revealed as Hornswoggle since he asks for the mother of the bastard son, who I don’t think we ever saw. Santino comes in and says nothing of importance and is thrown out. MVP comes in and asks why he’s not wrestling tonight.

I’d tell him to see my above rant but I haven’t mastered talking into the past yet. He says he wants to issue an open challenge to Matt Hardy which has a rant coming later on. Regal implies that he could be the son before leaving. I love how it was just assumed that Vince’s child was in the WWE and not maybe an accountant in West Virginia.

Rey Mysterio is coming back….TONIGHT! Yeah we were told this about 15 minutes ago.

IC Title: Kennedy vs. Umaga vs. Carlito

Ok, so maybe at this point there still was a bit of a midcard to speak of. Around this time the IC Title was actually doing really well. Guys like Hardy, Nitro (Morrison), Umaga, Kennedy and Carlito were fighting over it so you were at least having the midcard come in and fight over it. Then Jericho came in and killed things dead, which is a shame.

It would be another year when Santino won it for a second time and turned it into a complete joke that the title died for the most part, with it taking Rey and Jericho’s feud over it to turn it back into something special. Kennedy is over here or at least predictable as the fans are chanting what he’s going to say and reacting well to it. Carlito gets less than no reaction. He was in desperate need of new music at this point as it just didn’t fit his character at all.

It amuses me that of these three, only Carlito is still with the company. This is happening because of a double pin between the two challengers on Raw. JR continues his epic commentary career by saying that Umaga is going to come at everyone in this match hard, especially Kennedy and Carlito. Yeah, I’d say that’s true as that IS everyone in the match. Apparently Kennedy injured Lashley. Kennedy hurting someone? You don’t say!

Carlito hits a springboard back elbow, instantly making him cooler to me. Kennedy hits a Stroke, which he sets up exactly like he did with the Mic Check. That was something that was always an issue with Kennedy. Until he got the Mic Check, he used at least three finishers inside of a year that I can remember. He never would just pick something and stick with it.

Kennedy goes to the floor and rips up a table, stealing a monitor. He slams it squarely into the post which is called the head of Umaga, knocking him out. The challengers double team him but in a very cool spot, go for a double suplex that is countered into both of them being suplexed with one arm. With all three men down the referee starts counting to which JR says he’s not sure why. I don’t know Ross, MAYBE BECAUSE IT’S HIS JOB???

In an ending that feels rushed, Kennedy hits that rolling Death Valley Driver thing that I don’t think had a name that stuck, but Umaga casually comes in, pulls Kennedy up and spikes him for the pin to retain. That just felt rushed and WAY too sudden.

Rating: C+. This just felt very rushed at the end. I like that there was an actual midcard match here, but it was treated like a filler, which it shouldn’t have been. This was ok, but it could have been FAR better.

In another head scratching moment, we see a video talking about how Taker returns at Unforgiven. Ok, that’s fine. However, they say that no one has ever beaten him up like Henry did. Ok, let’s see. Set on fire twice, buried alive twice, beaten unconscious by Khali and Lesnar, beaten down badly by Kane many times, yeah Henry isn’t even in the top ten all time. I love the rewriting of history. Actually I don’t but oh well. This of course is ruined by that horrid pop song that is the theme. Undertaker does not need to be associated with bad pop music.

We get a recap of Rey vs. Chavo. Chavo injured Rey’s knee so that Rey could go have surgery, beating him in an I Quit match. It was followed by him wearing Rey’s mask and being annoying. They actually tried to make Chavo be a major heel, which of course just completely failed for the simple reason of he’s Chavo Guerrero.

Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero

So yeah we’re doing the same match this year with a different storyline. It’s much better this year though as it’s about the two of them and not about Eddie. Rey does that thing where he springs out of the stage that I’ve always liked. In something I remember from the LD, Rey is painted silver. What is his obsession with super heroes? This is the continuation of the feud from last year which has no Eddie mentions now, so at least they got the hint that it was horrible.

Despite Rey being painted silver, JBL says he’s been bronzed. JBL goes on to say that Chavo will go for the knee until he either gets it or he won’t. Thank you for that one John. To continue his epicness, he says Pedro Martinez, but Michael Cole cuts him off so we have no idea what his point was going to be. Naturally the main point here is how strong Rey’s knee is. We get the Pedro reference from earlier as he talks about how Pedro’s shoulder was bad and he’s not throwing as fast anymore.

Ok that at least makes sense. See, if Cole hadn’t cut JBL off then we could have gotten a decent point out of JBL instead of him sounding like an imbecile. The paint is coming off of Rey and it just looks funny with streaks of skin showing through. Chavo works on the knee, including a bunch of holds where the knee isn’t moved at all. JBL calls Cole a parrot which is funny. Chavo gets kicked in the head and conveniently falls into the ropes in position for a 619.

I love how that happens for no one but Rey. It doesn’t hit as the knee gives out. For no reason at all Chavo goes for a slam and his knee goes out for a two. That was random. For the 100th time, JBL says that we won’t know how solid Rey’s knee is until it’s tested. WE GET IT.

Rey is mostly skin again so it looks like his mask is leaking or something. Yet again after more punishment on the knee it improves enough to go for the 619. It misses and Chavo goes for the three suplexes. This works again as Eddie is never mentioned. The fans boo him though so everything is right with the world. A 619 and springboard splash ends this.

Rating: B-. This was light years ahead of last year because the story was about these two and not Eddie, who wasn’t needed last year and this is proof of it. Rey was healthy here and you could see that he was fine. Chavo as a major heel is stupid though, and JBL’s commentary is actually quite bad as he does little other than repeat himself. This was fine though and even good at times.

Raw is on Sci Fi tomorrow.

Booker is in the back with Todd. The king says that HHH will have little to be happy about tonight. Book sounded weird here as he sounded unhappy with what he was doing and he stumbled a bit. It was almost like he was nervous.

Divas Battle Royal

The winner faces Candice at some time in the future. Candice comes out first and does nothing of note, other than have a really annoying theme song. Since all of them start at once, here they are in the order they’re introduced: Maria, Beth, Melina, Jillian, Mickie, Torrie (she’s still there at this point?), Victoria, Krystal, Michelle, Brooke, Layla, Kelly. Yeah, raise your hand if you know who’s winning this already.

It’s kicking and punching and hair pulling a go-go here as that’s all most of these girls can do at this point. I’m so bored right now I can’t put it into words. People are being eliminated here and the announcers aren’t even calling it. You can tell they’re bored out of their minds too. Candice is actually sitting in a director’s style chair with palm fronds sticking out of the back of it. I can’t think of words to describe how awful this is.

Beth is very loudly heard calling spots to the girls that have no clue what they’re doing. Apparently this isn’t over the top rope as Victoria goes between the bottom and middle ropes and is gone. Can this please end any faster? They’re all wearing pink or orange for the most part so it’s hard to even tell who everyone is. The final four are Melina, Beth, Torrie and Michelle. Final two are Michelle and Beth. This lasts all of 4 seconds as Beth wins. Thank goodness this is over.

Rating: F. It was sloppy, it was long, it was boring. What more do you expect of a grade here?

With literally no transition, MVP comes out with people carrying a cooler. Literally, we see Candice and hear his music in the same shot. He says no one cares about the Divas. That’s just comical because it’s about as close to true as you can get. He talks about how he’s better than everyone else and challenges Matt to a beer drinking contest. This was during the time that MVP was hurt and it derailed the Matt beats MVP for the title storyline.

The problem was simple: this feud had been going on for awhile now and Matt wouldn’t win the title until the END OF MAY. Part of this was that Matt’s appendix burst, putting him on the shelf for a few months. Vince was I guess obsessed with Matt beating him for the title as he let this drag on for nearly a year. The problem was that we stopped caring. These two competed in everything: arm wrestling, boxing, pizza eating, basketball, beer drinking, and I could go on for a good while longer.

The problem was simple: we wanted something new and we couldn’t get it because of the injuries. Just go to someone else! Hardy gets something close to a pop I guess. Apparently this coming Friday these two have a tag title shot. That was another segment of this feud. This is just stupid as they argue for even longer to fill more time. Matt says he won’t even try.

He talks about how a few weeks ago, MVP got Evander Holyfield to substitute for him, and I think I know where this is going. Yep, the glass shatters and Steve Austin is here. This segment just got better and now it’s no longer filler. The fans are going nuts for this. I love the line JBL says. Cole is talking about how it’s completely fair as MVP did the same with Holyfield. “It’s completely different. That was just Evander Holyfield. THIS IS FREAKING STONE COLD STEVE AUSTIN!”

Only in professional wrestling would you hear that. Austin hits the ropes a few times and does some pushups. Only Austin would consider beer drinking an athletic event. He throws in some jumping jacks for good measure. He hasn’t said a word at this point either but the fans are WAY into him. They start drinking and Austin kicks him and stuns him of course. Two things: Austin kicks him in the title belt, so would that even make him keel over?

Second, MVP takes the stunner really well. He jumps backwards but not way too high like Hall did. That always just got annoying, but MVP more or less bounces back. That was well done. JBL’s ranting about how Austin isn’t a fair opponent is really quite funny.

Wrestlemania is coming to Orlando.

In the back with Vince and the GMs, Cryme Tyme shows up and says one of them could be his son. Vince is apparently not liking being called V Mac, but Vinny Mac was fine I suppose? This was back when CT was a big deal almost before being release for screwing up an official at a house show.

They start a dance party in the back, with Coach, Long and Regal dancing around Vince. Regal actually was quite good. He goes on his own but turns around to have Ron Simmons in front of him. A single obscenity follows.

Back in the arena the girl that does the theme song dances to her own song. Yeah that’s not stupid at all.

ECW Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

This was a very well built up feud. Morrison had taken Benoit’s spot and therefore his championship at Vengeance and has feuded with Punk since. He really hadn’t proven himself yet, but they built him up very well. They didn’t make him seem like a guy that was in over his head, but rather a rookie wonder, almost like Orton was three years prior to this.

Punk is very popular here as despite what the IWC would want you to think, Punk has been popular in WWE since the day he showed up and is way over to this day. Punk got this in a 15 minutes of fame match against Morrison, which was a cool idea: last 15 minutes or pin the champion in that amount of time and you get a shot. Punk chasing the belt for awhile was a good idea to me as it usually works best that way.

Obviously they didn’t want Morrison as their first choice, but he stepped up and made this work, and you can tell that it meant a lot to his career. Soon after this he would be paired with Miz for nearly a year and a half, forming one of the best tag teams in many years as Punk would become a major player in the company soon. This is a preview of the future of the company here, so it should be solid.

They start with a fast technical series which works really well for them. That’s a side you see from them both on a fairly decent rate and it’s working as always. Morrison hits a reverse neckbreaker, pulling Punk through the ropes and slamming his neck on the apron. That looked painful to say the least. This is a very fast paced match with neither guy getting a long lasting upper hand. The crowd is way into it also so it’s not just me that likes it.

Punk busts out a moonsault, and people say he’s bland in the ring. He uses all kinds of stuff. Anyway, Punk goes for a rana but Morrison holds on. He tries to get his feet on the ropes but misses them, which isn’t really his fault as he just couldn’t reach them. Either way, Morrison wins but Punk “got robbed.” I know that was lacking jokes, but this was just a freaking good match. It was very fast, both guys were sharp, the offense wasn’t boring, and the ending made great sense. I loved this.

Rating: B+. It was just barely 7 minutes and it left me wanting more. You can’t ask for much more than that. These two have always had great matches and this was no exception. This is a rare occasion when people called the future actually live up to that billing.

Raw is still on Sci-Fi tomorrow night.

Booker T vs. HHH

We start with a way too long recap of Booker humiliating JR and King. That’s fine as it sets the stage just a bit. Booker comes out and has the crown and robe and that’s all well and good. Now let’s get to the problem with this. The HHH return is so over the top here that it’s horrible.

You tell me. Which of those two was more interesting? The first was just flat out corny. The second was a big time wrestler returning. As for the match let’s get to it. For one thing, just having his own face on his tights isn’t something I want to see. How ridiculous does that look? HHH of course gets beaten down at first, only to make the comeback. The basic idea here is that HHH is awesome, Booker is pretty good and Sharmell is annoying.

In something that I find amusing, HHH goes after Booker’s leg. While it’s not hurt, that’s a nice little thing that shows that HHH is thinking. I like it and yes, I’m making it out to be cooler than it really is. Anyway, Booker hits some big moves including the Book End, but HHH is up, because it’s his return match. Did you really expect him to lose? More on that later. Booker counters two Pedigrees here, one of which he does by just punching HHH’s leg. That’s so simple that it’s brilliant.

Anyway, of course HHH wins with a pretty weak looking Pedigree, but he gets it, and then a standing ovation from JR and King. Ok, there’s being glad a guy is back, and then there’s just flat out overkill. We get it: HHH is a great wrestler and one of the biggest stars ever. No one is questioning that, but this is just taking it too far. He celebrates for a long while, which I’m fine with, but don’t make it look like it’s the second coming.

Rating: B-. Eh, it was two A list guys so it had the star power. There was little story between the two, but in this case I like that better. This was about HHH returning, not HHH vs. Booker. It worked just fine in that regard. Yes the announcers were WAY over the top, but to be fair the storyline was written that way. Now, this is where the IWC showed how idiotic it was to me. I remember one of the first real arguments I got into on WZ was over this match.

There were people that said HHH was burying Booker here, as he hadn’t had a match in 9 months and he beats a major star. Ok, nonsense. Now I’ve made no secret of the fact that I’m not a huge HHH fan. Like Cena, I’m relatively indifferent to him. There are moments where I’ll applaud him and there are moments when I’ll boo him. However, there would be no justification at all for him losing here.

Yes, Booker is a major star. HHH is a bigger one. HHH was returning. Booker was doing nothing. He was put into this feud because he had nothing else to do on the show. It had been a year since he was in a top level angle, as he had a very short feud with both Taker and Matt Hardy. Remember those feuds? I don’t either. He had been out for about a month with an injury and came back to be put with HHH.

Booker was a world champion a year ago at this time, but in the world of professional wrestling, that’s an eternity. Booker had no business beating HHH. How is he being buried? He’s facing a bigger star and he lost. Did Hulk Hogan bury the One Man Gang or King Kong Bundy when he beat them? No he didn’t because they weren’t on his level, just like Booker isn’t on HHH’s level. Hopefully most people reading this just said duh at most of that, as I’d hope you have more intelligence than that.

Update: Undertaker is still returning at Unforgiven. Nothing has changed in the last hour.

We get a recap of Batista vs. Khali, which just isn’t going to be a good idea if my KB-sense is correct. Basically, Khali says he can’t be beaten and Batista says he can beat Khali. Khali debuts the head vice and that’s all there is to it.

Smackdown World Title: Great Khali vs. Batista

Batista is about 6’6 and he looks tiny, as does the belt and the chair. That’s freaking scary. It’s weird hearing the lack of the Punjabi Playboy music which is rather awesome actually and better than this is. Champion came out first here which is always kind of odd. The palm trees around the entrance are stupid looking.

Khali beats him down early and the Animal is in trouble early on. Big Dave gets in a bit of offense but walks into the chop to take him back down. Khali grabs the neck grip rather than slipping his hands up like 5 inches for the Vice Grip. Batista starts going on as this is already a very dull match. Yep the fans think this is boring. I can’t really argue much with that.

Cole tries to tell us that the fans are getting restless which is amusing. Bradshaw says Khali is monkey butt ugly. Well you can’t say he’s not blunt. Batista gets a spinebuster to get out of the Vice Grip but can’t get the Batista Bomb. Khali hits the Punjabi Plunge for two. Singh slides in a chair to Khali and there’s the cheap DQ. Really that’s it?

Rating: D-. Oy this wasn’t good. Vince instantly thinks that every muscle guy like Batista can do what Hogan did. That’s just not the case. Hogan was able to make the others look great because Hogan was a far better wrestler and thinker than he was given credit for. Neither of these guys have that mental aspect that makes a wrestler great. Their styles are far too similar and almost nothing Batista can do can make him look sensible or effective against Khali.

Batista isn’t nearly as bad as he’s made out to be, but this wasn’t a fair request of him. Now last year against Booker was a different story. Booker is a big guy, but not big enough that Batista couldn’t do something with him. This one is much harder to blame on the Animal as Khali is just too big to do anything with. That’s not his fault, but rather the person that green lit this match.

Post match, Batista gets the chair and beats Khali up. Or does he beat him down. Diagonally? Or is it horizontally?

The Condemned is on DVD.

Vince is in the back and Regal says there are some women here for him. You know who they’re going to be. Mae says she wants to be the mother of his next bastard son and shoves him onto a couch and kisses him. Moolah pulls her out by the hair and they leave. Vince says he liked it. Sadly, Moolah would pass away in about two and a half months due to complications from a shoulder operation.

We get a short recap of Cena vs. Orton. It’s a very basic concept. Cena has beaten every heel on the roster except one: Randy Orton. Cena turned around one night and got RKOed. It’s a very basic build but it made you think that Orton could do it. Cena had held the title longer than anyone in over twenty years at this point, so anything was possible. Orton had injured HBK, RVD, Dusty Rhodes, Slaughter and others, so it was a distinct possibility that he could take Cena out here as well.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

The fans are certainly going with the flow here as Orton is booed and Cena isn’t booed as loudly. He gets another mixed reaction which is something I’ve always liked. We get something you don’t see any more as the referee checks each guy for weapons. It takes a few seconds and makes things look more legit, so why not bring that back? Lawler mentions that Orton has a fan club in Lichtenstein.

That’s too absurd to make up so I’m going to assume it’s true. If so, that’s pretty cool to me. They start out with a headlock, which is about as basic of a move that you can start with, and in a big match it works every single time. Orton takes the early advantage and holds onto it for a good while, which also makes sense. They’re following a very basic formula here and there’s nothing at all wrong with that.

Since this is a long Orton match, we hit about the 4 minute mark in total chinlock time. That’s added to the two minutes of headlock time, making this match VERY BORING. We’ve been at this about 15 minutes and Cena has been in control about 45 seconds. Oh wait, could this be a comeback? Nope, Orton counters with that backbreaker he does which starts from what you ask? A chinlock. Of course this is the most damage that Cena has ever taken since that happens every match.

Oh and Orton is coldblooded. You’d think he was a reptile, or maybe even a viper. Yeah that string of jokes is getting old to me also. Of course Cena kicks out of the move that injured RVD because he’s John Cena blast it. Ross says Orton is Viper-like. And so it begins. Orton goes for the RKO but Cena shoves him off and we’re on the floor and more violence ensues. Back in, Cena starts his real comeback, this time with Orton being beaten down pretty well.

They go for the throwback, but they botch it and Cena comes at his head instead of his back, making it look like a running neckbreaker or Morrison’s diving neckbreaker that he used to do. They speed things up a lot as it’s both guys trying to hit their finisher. Orton gets caught in the STFU but gets the ropes.

Cena is pissed and despite Orton being in the hold for a good while, he hits the RKO out of nowhere. At least he sells the hold just after it so maybe I could go for that. Cena kicks out and the crowd is WAY into this. Cena is up way to fast and hits the fastest FU in history to win clean before collapsing from the RKO. Replays and photo opportunities close us out.

Rating: B. This is a tale of two matches. The beginning part of it is just flat out boring. However, the last 5 minutes of this is great stuff with the crowd eating from the palms of their hands. These two can bring it pretty well most of the time and this was fine. They built from slow to fast which is how things are supposed to go. This was a solid main event and should be in two weeks.

Overall Rating: B. This was a very back and forth show with good and bad stuff. Some of the matches are just flat out horrible and some of the matches are great. The ECW and WWE title matches are great as was the Austin segment. This was a solid show all around I think and while I’d avoid the Diva match and Batista’s match, the rest of the show is certainly good so it’s recommended.

 

 

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