Wrestlemania XVI
Date: April 2, 2000
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 18,034
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

This is also called Wrestlemania 2000 but the purist in me won’t let that happen. This is a step up over last year’s one match show as this year we have a two match show. The main event is a fatal fourway elimination match between HHH, the Rock, Big Show and the one night only returning Mick Foley. The other match is Angle vs. Benoit vs. Jericho in a two fall double title match. You might notice a few multi-man matches there and you’re going to notice a lot of them tonight. There isn’t a single one on one match on the entire card tonight, which might be the only time ever in company history. Let’s get to it.

Lillian Garcia sings the national anthem. I’ve heard her do this live and my goodness can she sing the heck out of that song.

We open with a recap of the previous 15 Wrestlemanias which sounds like it’s narrated by a James Earl Jones impersonator.

Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Big Boss Man/Bull Buchanan

Ice-T raps Godfather and Brown to the ring. Apparently it’s pimp or die, which I think might be taking it a bit too far. Buchanan and Brown get things going to prevent us from having a future RTC matchup. D’Lo tries a quick O’Connor Roll but only gets two. Boss Man tries to come in but gets run over by Godfather. Off to Godfather for a clothesline and the spinning legdrop but an elbow misses.

Godfather gets beaten on for a bit but comes back with a hook kick for two. Back to Brown who is almost immediately caught by Buchanan for even more pain. D’Lo pounds on Buchanan in the corner as this is going nowhere so far. Of all people, Bull gets things moving a bit better by climbing the corner for a spinning clothesline. Bull puts him in 619 position and both heels slide under the ropes for a double uppercut.

A clothesline gets two more for Bull and everything breaks down for a few seconds. That goes nowhere so we go back to Buchanan pounding on Brown in the corner. Now we keep the excitement going with a bearhug. Boss Man comes in for some double teaming and does his best to get the fans to care at all.

Brown’s cross body is caught in a backbreaker for two from both guys but as Buchanan goes up, Godfather crotches him down. Brown comes back with a nice top rope rana to put Buchanan down on the mat, allowing for the hot tag to Godfather. House is cleaned and there’s the Ho Train to Boss Man. Bull breaks up the Low Down though, allowing the Boss Man Slam to set up a guillotine legdrop on D’Lo for the pin.

Rating: D+. Who in the world thought this was the right idea for an opening match? They were WAY off base with each other here and the match suffered a lot as a result. This didn’t work on almost any level and on top of all that, the popular team loses. The whole point of an opening is to fire up a crowd, so having one of the most over acts in the company lose was a dumb way to start things off. Just a bad match all around.

HHH and Stephanie talk about how awesome their titles are. She’s Women’s Champion if that wasn’t really clear.

We see a conference with the Hardcore Battle Royal participants. Basically it’s a huge free for all and not a traditional battle royal. There’s a fifteen minute time limit and there can be as many title changes as there needs to be. Basically whoever is the last man standing is champion and the 24/7 rule stops after the last fall.

Hardcore Title: Hardcore Battle Royal

Tazz, Crash Holly, Hardcore Holly, Viscera, Joey Abs, Rodney, Pete Gas, Taka Michinoku, Funaki, Thrasher, Mosh, Faarooq, Bradshaw

Crash is defending coming in. He comes in last and we’re ready to go. Remember there’s a fifteen minute time limit. Everyone else fights to the floor and Taz hits a fast suplex on Crash for the pin ad the title in thirty seconds. So now, only Taz can be pinned for the title. A few seconds later, Viscera hits Tazz with a board and gets the title. Now we move into an extended period of hitting people in the head with whatever objects are handy.

We’ve got thirteen and a half minutes or so to go. Someone uses a box fan on someone else and that’s about the most in depth coverage you’ll be getting here. Everyone jumps Viscera and hits him with whatever they can find. Crash appears to be busted open. The Acolytes double team the champion and the beatings continue on everyone for a bit. Hardcore and Mosh beat Viscera down and get two each.

We’re under ten minutes now and it’s fine extinguisher time. There’s so much stuff going on it’s impossible to call. Viscera heads back into the ring and goes up top (for those of you unfamiliar, Viscera is about Big Show’s size), only to be slammed down by the Acolytes. The APA (Acolyte Protection Agency, same team) breaks a board over his back and Bradshaw hits a top rope shoulder to put him down. For no apparent reason they throw Kai En Tai on top of Viscera, giving Funaki the belt.

Funaki, apparently the smartest guy in the match, grabs the belt and runs away. Everyone catches up to him in the back with 7:00 left. Rodney gets a fluke pin out of nowhere for the pin, which I believe is the Posse’s first pinfall. Joey suplexes him down and wins the title but Thrasher gets a clothesline and the title. Everyone beats up Thrasher now because its their job and we come into the arena again. Pete Gas hits Thrasher with a fire extinguisher and wins the title.

Taz gets his hands on the champion and brings him back to ringside for a beating. A t-bone suplex puts the bloody Pete down for the pin and the title with….dang it they took the clock down. Hardcore sends Taz into the steps for two before Mosh takes a shot at him. Taz rolls up Mosh for two on instinct alone. Now it’s the Hollys and Taz in the ring and three minutes to go. Crash gets cracked in the head by Taz for two which again means nothing. Hardcore puts Taz down and the cousins fight over a cover. Two minutes left and both Hollies get two off a powerslam by Hardcore.

We’ve got a minute left as Hardcore hits the dropkick for two. The champion hits a suplex on Hardcore to send him outside as Crash hits Taz with a trashcan lid for the title. The Tazmission goes on Crash but Hardcore blasts Taz in the head with a candy jar and covers Crash. The ending is screwed up though as Hardcore was supposed to get two but be stopped by the time.

Instead the referee had to stop counting…but Hardcore wins anyway. It made no sense, but either way the important thing here is Taz actually. That jar was made of real glass and when it shattered, some of it got in Taz’s eye. Allegedly he was supposed to win the Intercontinental Title but the reign went to Benoit instead.

Rating: B-. What do you want me to say about this? It was exactly what it was supposed to be so I can’t complain about it in that regard. They beat the tar out of each other with some funny spots and it was contained in one match instead of a big goofy show long angle like we had two years later. This rating could be all over the place depending on your taste for this stuff.

We look at Axxess over the weekend. Interestingly enough Undertaker is there in the biker attire.

Al Snow talks to someone in a bathroom stall when Steve Blackman comes in and says don’t do something stupid. This is during the Head Cheese (Snow and Blackman) attempt at finding Blackman a personality.

Trish is ready in the back.

Head Cheese vs. T&A

Snow brings out Chester McCheeserton, which is a guy in a cheese suit. Snow: “This is better than Shawn on a zipline.” That would be Test and Albert (Tensai) with the brand new Trish Stratus as their manager. Test and Blackman start as JR’s mic goes out. Test gets kicked down quickly but it’s off to Albert who hits a quick splash in the corner for two. Snow comes in for a few seconds but it’s quickly back to Steve for a running shoulder which takes Albert down.

Snow comes in again sans tag with a slingshot legdrop to the back of Albert’s head. Blackman breaks up a gorilla press attempt from Albert to give Snow two. Head Cheese double teams Albert as the fans are dying faster and faster by the minute here. Chester annoys Trish as Blackman drops a knee on Albert’s crotch. Off to Snow who gets caught in a suplex, allowing for the ice cold tag to Test.

T&A his a double powerbomb on Snow as JR calls it bowling shoe ugly. Snow hits an Asai Moonsault on Test before the modified Trash Compactor (backbreaker by Blackman/guillotine legdrop from Snow) for two on Test. The match breaks down even more as Albert hits a gorilla press on Blackman before a top rope elbow by Test gets the pin.

Rating: D-. Anything with Trish in an outfit that small can’t be a failure, but at the same time this match absolutely sucked. There was NOTHING good going on here and they weren’t just on different pages, but rather in different libraries. This was absolutely horrible and one of the worst Mania matches ever.

Post match Head Cheese beats up Chester. You know, because they’re good guys!

We get a “comedy” bit based off Austin Powers with Kat being sans clothing and Mae Young accidentally covering up the good parts.

The Dudleys say they’re afraid of heights but they’re ready for the triangle ladder match. This is when Bubba still had a stutter.

Tag Titles: Edge and Christian vs. Hardy Boyz vs. Dudley Boyz

The Dudleyz are defending and this is a triangle ladder match rather than a TLC match. That would come in September. This is when Edge and Christian still came through the crowd and somehow hadn’t won the tag titles yet. As the Dudleys pose in the aisle on a ladder during their entrance, the Canadians jump the only actual brothers in the match. This is going to be one of those matches that is almost impossible to keep track of. Bubba chops away at Jeff in the ring but gets caught by Whisper in the Wind. A Bubba Bomb puts Jeff right back down and they all head to the floor.

Christian sets up a ladder in the ring but Matt makes a save. Everyone gets back inside and there’s a second ladder. Matt throws one into the corner at Bubba for a sick thud right before D-Von is slammed onto a ladder and hit by a middle rope elbow. Jeff puts Bubba on the ladder but misses a 450, giving us a SICK looking crash. Bubba puts the ladder on top of Jeff and actually hits the middle rope backsplash to crush both of them. Edge rides a ladder out of the corner to crush another ladder onto Matt.

D-Von takes Edge down and all six guys are on the mat or floor now. Bubba is up first and we get the put the ladder around your own neck and spin around in a circle move. Edge and Christian finally dropkick the ladder into Bubba to put him down and there’s a double flapjack into the ladder in the corner on D-Von. Christian climbs a ladder and dives onto Matt and Bubba on the floor. This is all happening with almost no breaks in between. Jeff climbs the ladder in the ring but Edge jumps off the top with a spear. That would be topped by about 1000 next year.

Matt hits a crucifix bomb on Edge before trying to climb, only to be slammed down by D-Von. D-Von goes up, only to have Christian throw the ladder at him to bring him down. There are now three ladders set up in the middle of the ring and it’s Bubba with a Cutter to Christian off two of them. Awesome looking move there. With Bubba down, the Hardys hit a splash/legdrop combination off the top of the ladders. D-Von tries to climb but the Canadians suplex him off the ladder.

Everyone but the Dudleyz climb up but they all come flying down due to a facebuster and a Russian legsweep in another spot that would be topped next year. The Dudleys are back in now and the fans want tables. Now all six guys climb three ladders and as you can guess, they all go flying down. Christian and Jeff get the worst of it, crashing out to the floor. Bubba lands on his feet and shoves the other two ladders over, leaving him alone in the ring. D-Von is back up too but here’s Christian back to his feet, only to get crushed between two ladders.

Edge comes back in and gets caught in the original 3D, with Bubba running for the cutter instead of just standing there. Bubba loads up a table as is his custom and D-Von gets one of his own. There are two ladders set up in the ring and the Dudleys are all alone, but instead of climbing they make a scaffold out of a table between the tops of the ladders. The Hardys get back up to make the save but are easily dispatched. Again the Dudleys screw up though by setting up another table under the scaffold and a third on the floor.

Bubba powerbombs Matt through the one on the floor but D-Von misses a splash through Jeff on one of the tables back in the ring. Jeff tries to run the rail but Bubba pelts him in the face with a ladder. Bubba loads up the super ladder in the aisle before setting up a table in front of it. I can smell wrestling law #1 from here. Jeff comes back and takes Bubba out before putting him on the ladder. In the famous spot from this match, Jeff climbs to the top of the super ladder and hits the Swanton through Bubba through the table to put both of them out.

Back in the ring D-Von suplexes Christian down and goes for a climb but here’s Matt to break it up. The Twist of Fate takes D-Von down and now it’s Matt and Christian climbing the ladders. They both wind up on the scaffolding that was set up earlier but here’s Edge from behind. The brothers throw Matt through the table, allowing Edge and Christian to pull down the belts for their first titles.

Rating: A-. There are two problems with this match. First of all, the match the next year blows it away. Second, and far worse, the last ten minutes were spent setting up spots instead of actually going for the belts. Take the big spot of the match for example. Why in the world would Bubba do that instead of for the sake of doing that spot later? Same with all the other tables set up. There was no logic to doing that, but they did the spots anyway. Still though, excellently fun match.

Mick Foley and Linda McMahon say the main event tonight is the biggest match of all time and thanks to Linda, Mick gets to be in the main event at Wrestlemania. He says fairy tales can come true, one will come true for him.

Terri Runnels vs. The Kat

It’s a Catfight, meaning you have to put your opponent on the floor to win. Val Venis is referee and Moolah and Mae are in the respective corners. The referee compares a certain part of himself to Wrestlemania in a promo that would get him chased off by a pitchfork carrying mob in today’s world. Venis is in a referee’s towel too. Early on he picks up Terri and gets kissed in a spot that would have made the Montreal Screwjob completely different.

Kat hits a lame spear but Val has to stop Mae from flashing everyone. Terri is sent to the floor but there’s no referee. The old chicks get in the ring and Mae kisses Val. Kat throws Terri to the floor but Moolah pulls Kat to the outside. Terri is the only one in as Val escapes Mae, giving Terri the win. Total mess but it was a bridge between the big match and the rest of the show.

Terri is stripped post match.

The Radicalz are ready for the six man tag but Eddie is more interested in melting Chyna with the Latino Heat.

Radicalz vs. Too Cool/Chyna

This would be Saturn/Malenko/Guerrero. They’re brand new at this point and Dean is already Light Heavyweight Champion. Too Cool was their first feud and it was a big enough deal that Too Cool rode it to a tag title reign in a few months. Eddie and Scotty start things off and Scott has his hat knocked off almost immediately. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Eddie down and it’s off to Chyna, sending Guerrero running off to Dean.

Malenko loads up a fast powerbomb but Scotty clotheslines him down to break it up. Chyna and the Grandmaster suplex Malenko down and it’s time to dance. Back to Eddie to face Grandmaster with Sexay hitting a quick suplex. Saturn breaks up the top rope legdrop though and the Radicalz take over. Perry comes in legally now and steals Grandmaster’s dew rag, somehow making him look even more ridiculous.

Eddie comes back in and allows Grandmaster to make a tag to Scotty. That goes badly for the non Radicalzas Scotty charges into a hot shot followed by the slingshot hilo for no cover. Grandmaster comes back in sans tag and throws Eddie to the floor as things fall apart. Scotty loads up a double Worm on Saturn and Malenko but an Eddie distraction lets them get back up. There’s no one in the ring at the moment until we get back to Scotty vs. Eddie. Perry comes back in and superkicks Hotty down.

A top rope elbow hits Scotty but again there’s no cover. Instead it’s back to Guerrero who goes up but takes too long, allowing Scotty to crotch him. A superplex puts both guys down and there’s the hot tag to Chyna. She cleans house with handspring elbows and a double low blow to Saturn and Malenko. Eddie decks her though, breaking part of her outfit in the process. Chyna escapes a powerbomb into one of her own, grabs Eddie’s crotch and slams him down before finishing him with a sleeper drop.

Rating: D+. This didn’t work for me for the most part but the main story of Chyna vs. Eddie was advanced which is the right idea. This would wind up meaning nothing (in a way) though as Chyna would fall victim to the Latino Heat the next day, starting a summer long relationship between the two. I guess that crotch grab changed her mind.

The redneckiest rednecks of all time won a contest to go to Wrestlemania.

Big Show and Shane say Show will win.

We get a clip from earlier of Angle beating up his mentor Bob Backlund after finding out that Backlund came up with the idea of Kurt defending both titles.

Angle asks a security guard for extra security for the post match celebration.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

This is an interesting idea. Angle holds both titles coming in and there are going to be two falls here. The first is for the Intercontinental Title and the second is for the European Title, so basically we’re getting back to back triple threats. Jericho guarantees to walk out of this match as the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah while the other two will walk out with a shirt that complains about how lousy the shirt is as well as how bad the beating from Jericho was.

Benoit jumps Angle before the bell before heading inside for a clothesline from his fellow Canadian. All three are in now and Benoit chops Jericho, only to have his belly to back suplex escaped. Benoit breaks up a springboard dropkick by Jericho before fighting with Angle on the apron. Jericho hits the previously broken up dropkick to send both guys out to the floor. He joins them immediately, only to be sent into the steps by Kurt. Back in and a belly to belly suplex gets two for Angle on Jericho.

Jericho hits a backbreaker on Angle but Benoit shoves Jericho off the top and into the announce table for good measure. Benoit covers Angle for two before suplexing him down for the same. Jericho is back in for a dropkick to his fellow Canadian but Benoit comes right back with a clothesline for two more. Jericho bulldogs Angle down but Benoit comes back with chops of his own on the other Chris. Angle suplexes Benoit down but Jericho makes the save. Very back and forth action so far.

Jericho camel clutches Benoit but has to break it up to stop a charging Kurt. Angle hits a big suplex on Jericho for two as Benoit makes another save. Benoit rolls up Jericho in the corner but Angle dropkicks his head face first into the middle buckle to break it up. Jericho loads up a double arm suplex on Angle but gets countered into a crossface chickenwing. Benoit comes back in and dropkicks Angle before sending him to the floor and into the barricade. Back in and the Swan Dive to Jericho gives Benoit the first fall and the Intercontinental Title.

Very wisely Benoit immediately covers Jericho for an attempt at the European Title but it only gets two as Kurt dives in for the save. Angle suplexes Benoit down for two but takes too long on the moonsault attempt, allowing Jericho to break it up. Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but Benoit supelxes Chris down, allowing Angle to miss the moonsault on Benoit. All three guys are down now until Angle covers Benoit for two. Jericho gets back into it with a Walls attempt on Angle, only to have the other Chris break it up.

Everyone gets back up and it’s Jericho with a spinwheel kick to take Benoit to the floor. The double powerbomb puts Angle down but Benoit comes back in for the Rolling Germans on Jericho. Benoit goes old school with a Dragon Supelx on Angle for two. Jericho hits the forearm on the referee by mistake, only to be put in the Crossface by the new IC Champion.

It gets an unseen tapout but Benoit releases, allowing Jericho to put Benoit in the Walls. Angle hits Jericho with a title belt but Benoit makes the save as the referee is awake again. Benoit suplexes Angle down again but misses the Swan Dive. Jericho slides in for the Lionsault on Benoit for the European Title to end things.

Rating: B+. Awesome match here which would have been match of the year when this style dominated in 2003. All three guys were the future generation of the company once we shifted to the technical style over on Smackdown in a few years, but here it’s just awesome instead of a match of the times. This is one of the only things that people remember from this show and with good reason: it was awesome.

Vince says he’ll be a factor in the main event. He’s in Rock’s corner tonight and doesn’t think his family is dysfunctional. Vince promises to make it right tonight. You can smell the screwjob coming from here.

HHH doesn’t like what Vince just said and promises not to lose.

D-Generation X vs. Rikishi/Kane

This would be Road Dogg and X-Pac with Tori as the final surviving members of the team. Kane has the wicked awesome inverted colors on tonight with mainly black trimmed with red. Tori slaps Paul Bearer before the match but gets choked by Kane for his efforts. It’s a brawl to start with Rikishi hitting a quick Stinkface on Road Dogg. The fat man turns his attention to Tori but Pac makes a last minute save. D-X tries to leave to no avail as the big men slowly chase them down.

We finally get started with Pac vs. Rikishi and the smaller man hitting a spinning kick in the corner but no Bronco Buster follows. Off to Roadie for the dancing punches and a forearm to put Rikishi down. The shaky knee gets two and it’s back to Pac for some kicks to the chest which have no effect. A Samoan Drop puts Pac down and there’s the tag to Kane. Kane gets to beat up X-Pac which is the whole point of the match. X-Pac avoids the Stinkface but Bearer throws Tori in to take his place. Kane tombstones Pac to end this.

Rating: D. This was another way to bridge between the two matches while also giving us a nice closure to this feud. Rikishi was a popular guy at the time so giving him a big match on a show like this was the right idea. Tori screwed over Kane months before so seeing her get what was coming to her was a nice feeling. The match sucked though.

Post match Too Cool and the San Diego Chicken come out to celebrate but Kane doesn’t trust the bird. Everyone dances as Kane stares at the chicken. Either Pete is a far better dancer than expected or there’s something afoot. Kane stares down at the bird but here’s Pete Rose with a ball bat. This goes as badly as the other years have gone and it’s a chokeslam and a Stinkface for the Hit King. I’ll give the guy this: he’s willing to do almost whatever the WWF asked of him.

Rock says it’s been twelve months since he was world champion and there have been a lot of bad moments for Rock since then. After ever chokeslam, every Mandible Claw and every Pedigree, he’s back here at Wrestlemania for his world title. If Rock has an ounce of blood and sweat, he’s going to layeth the Smacketh Down tonight for the millions and millions.

Various celebrities are here tonight, including Michael Clarke Duncan and Martin Short.

Here’s a recap of the main event which the company doesn’t think is important enough to explain to you. HHH is defending champion and retired Foley at No Way Out. Rock won the Rumble but Big Show presented HHH with a video showing that Rock’s feet hit first. This got Big Show a match at No Way Out for the #1 contendership where he beat Rock. Rock then earned the shot back by beating Big Show on Raw. Linda McMahon brought Foley back for one night only and if he wins tonight, there’s a tournament leading up to the title match at Backlash.

The real story here is that there’s a McMahon in every corner: Vince with Rock because Vince respect him, Stephanie with her husband HHH, Linda with the feel good story of Foley and Shane with Big Show because he sees Show as his ticket to the top of the company. In other words, the wrestlers are just there as the McMahons are the real show here.

WWF World Title: The Rock vs. Mick Foley vs. HHH vs. Big Show

There are no tags here, no disqualification and you have to win by pin. Why there are no submissions is beyond me but whatever. Rock and Big Show fight as do the other two with the champion being punched down. Allegedly Foley was told a week before this match that he would be participating so he isn’t in the best of shape. Granted that’s normal for him so maybe it won’t be that big of a deal.

Big Show runs over everyone and gorilla presses HHH and Rock. Foley gets a headbutt but tries to jump on Show’s back, only to have the giant crush him against the mat. Rock comes back with right hands on Big Show but walks into a side slam for no cover. HHH jumps into a chokeslam attempt but Foley breaks it up with a low blow. Everyone triple teams Big Show to a big reaction and a running clothesline from Rock puts him down. They all stomp away at the giant but HHH and Foley just can’t work together that long.

Foley blasts HHH in the ribs with a chair and hits Show in the back with it as well, allowing the Rock Bottom to get rid of the biggest guy in the match. We’re down to three now and Shane is ticked off. HHH offers Foley an alliance against Rock but Foley says no. Instead HHH offers Rock an alliance against Foley but we get a Rock and Sock Connection reunion as HHH gets beaten down. HHH gets punched down and dropped with a double clothesline.

The champion is sent to the floor but the Connection won’t fight each other. Instead they head to the outside and beat up HHH even more to the fans’ delight. Rock picks up the bell but accidentally blasts Foley in the head. Foley gets up quickly and finds a barbed wire 2×4. HHH saves himself with a low blow and a shot to Foley’s ribs with the board. Rock comes back in and is backdropped to the floor, allowing Foley to hit the double arm DDT on HHH. It’s Socko time and Rock adds a belt shot to take HHH down.

Rock loads up the Elbow but Foley puts the Claw on him to break it up. HHH hits them both low to put them both down but Rock gets back up first and pounds away on the champion. Foley gets in a shot to Rock for two and a double arm DDT gets the same. Vince slides in a chair for no apparent reason but Foley gets it first. It gets kicked back into his face by Rock for two as HHH makes the save. Why would he do something like that? A running knee lift gets two on Rock but HHH doesn’t save this time. Interesting.

HHH and Mick start working together for a bit and a knee drop gets two on Rock. They head to the floor with Mick’s knees being sent HARD into the steps. Mick picks up said steps and cracks Rock in the head with them as Stephanie yells at Linda. HHH puts Rock on the table for the Foley elbow through it….but Mick can’t jump that far and crashes ribs first into the edge of the table. HHH hits about three elbows of his own to put Rock through the table as the match continues to drag.

Back inside and HHH Pedigrees Foley for two and a big eruption from the crowd. A BIG chair shot to the head puts Foley down and Linda is panicking. HHH Pedigrees Mick onto the chair and the career is over again. We’re down to two now and HHH is somehow even more hated than he was before. Foley gets a big standing ovation but turns around to come back to the ring. He picks up the barbed wire and blasts HHH in the head to give us one last BANG BANG moment.

We’re finally down to HHH vs. Rock after twenty minutes of glorified preliminary stuff. Rock gets two off the barbed wire stuff and they head up to the stage for the required main event brawling. Rock suplexes HHH down on the concrete and does the same with a clothesline. They head into the crowd for even more “fighting” which means walking with the occasional punching. A backdrop puts HHH back at ringside where Rock picks up the steps, only to have HHH knock them onto Rock with a chair. He pounds on the steps with the chair to crush Rock even further underneath them.

A piledriver on the steps keeps Rock down even longer before we head inside again. The piledriver only gets two and Rock is somehow up again to slug away with right hands. Rock Bottom and Pedigree are both countered with HHH being backdropped out to the floor. Rock hits a kind of spinebuster to put HHH down and there’s a suplex through the table for good measure. Both guys are basically dead now but it’s Rock up first.

Vince can’t handle the lack of the spotlight anymore though and rams HHH into the post. Cue Shane again to take out Vince with a monitor shot to the head but Papa gets up a few seconds later to beat up his son. Shane comes back with a chairshot as we’re ignoring THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA to see Shane and Vince fight. As a bleeding Vince is taken out, we cut to a shot of Stephanie with the most vapid look you’ll ever see on her face.

We’re allowed to return to the match now with right hands from Rocky. A DDT gets two on the champion as does a tilt-a-whirl slam. HHH comes back with a facebuster and a barbed wire shot to the head of Rock. At least he’s nice enough to loudly ask “ARE YOU OK” before being catapulted into Shane. There’s the Rock Bottom but Rock can’t cover. Instead here’s Vince for the 87^th time tonight to slap Shane around. Then, as if you would expect anything else, he turns on Rock with a chair shot. Stephanie still fails at acting as HHH chairs Rock down again for the pin to retain and kill the crowd even deader.

Rating: D+. And that’s being VERY generous. This was the definition of McMahon overkill as it was ALL about them with the match literally being ignored at times while they had their repeated drama. On top of that the match sucked with the first 20 minutes being there to get us to the last 20 minutes which doesn’t do anyone any good. The rest of the match was just a big mess with no real story to it as we were all at the mercy of the McMahons. Instead of focusing on HHH vs. Rock, we had to wait 40 minutes for Vince to turn on Rock for no apparent reason. Also Rock would win the title at Backlash, making this entirely pointless.

Post match Vince and Stephanie reunite in the ring. Shane gets back in but before we can get more of McMahon World, Rock comes in with Rock Bottoms for all three McMahons. You might notice that HHH, the FREAKING WORLD CHAMPION, is nowhere in sight for all this. Oh wait he pops up on the apron to get punched down before Rock hits the People’s Elbow on Stephanie (who doesn’t even move an inch when it hits). The last shot of the show: the McMahons recovering of course.

Overall Rating: D. This show is the low point of the best year in the company’s history and it’s because of the McMahon drama. Again, there is zero reason to have them dominate a main event like this other than that’s what they wanted to happen. The stuff that was good though, while limited, was VERY good with the midcard title match and the tag title match blowing away everything else going on with this show. That main event is a BIG blow to it though given how long the thing ran. Check out those two matches and then go pick up the N64 game instead of the show as it’s WAY more entertaining.

Ratings Comparison

Big Boss Man/Bull Buchanan vs. D’Lo Brown/Godfather

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Hardcore Battle Royal

Original: C+

Redo: B-

T&A vs. Head Cheese

Original: F

Redo: D-

Edge and Christian vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Hardy Boyz

Original: B+

Redo: A-

The Kat vs. Terri Runnels

Original: F

Redo: N/A

Radicalz vs. Too Cool/Chyna

Original: D

Redo: D+

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A

Redo: B+

Rikishi/Kane vs. D-Generation X

Original: D+

Redo: D

HHH vs. The Rock vs. Big Show vs. Mick Foley

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Overall Rating

Original: D

Redo: D

Not much changes in a few years.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/03/23/history-of-wrestlemania-with-kb-wrestlemania-16-they-thought-this-was-a-good-idea/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Wrestlemania 2000
Date: April 2, 2000
Location: Arrowhead Pond, Anaheim, California
Attendance: 19,776
Star Spangled Banner: Lillian Garcia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This whole show is an interesting one, and this is primarily for two reasons. Number one: there is not a standard one on one match on the whole card. That’s just odd for any show. The other thing: Steve Austin and Undertaker were out with injuries here. This show is also important though because it’s the first show where all your big names are just that: big names.

HHH is the reigning WWF Champion, Rock is the #1 face in the company, Big Show is there for some reason, and Foley is “retired”, but getting one more shot as he finally gets to main event a Wrestlemania, which is a nice thing to let him do, despite the fact that he really had no business there at all. He was added less than two weeks before the show after the original main event, a three way match with HHH, Rock and Big Show happened on Raw for no apparent reasons at the time.

Also at this show, we have the WM debuts of Benoit, Angle, the Hardyz and the Dudleyz, as well as Edge and Christian being actual wrestlers here for the first time. This is the first show with the new generation being around, and it showed really well. It’s also the first show where the company more or less knew that WCW and any real threat to WWF’s survival was dead, so they didn’t have to nail it to ensure where their next paycheck was coming from. However, the important question is obvious: is the show with all these new stars better than last year’s? Let’s get to it.

Sweet goodness Lillian looks different here. She aged very well and actually looks better older than she does here. She can still sing though.
After a video highlighting the previous Manias either narrated by James Earl Jones (Darth Vader in an explanation I can’t believe I had to make) or the greatest imitation of his voice ever recorded, for the first time in Mania history, we get the MASSIVE pyro display that has become a standard in WWF. So with all this new talent, what’s our first great match?

Godfather/D’Lo Brown vs. Big Bossman/Bull Buchanan

Eh? We’re opening the show that’s supposed to lead the WWF and therefore the wrestling business into the new millennium and this is what you give us? And people wonder why wrestling went downhill in a hurry once WCW died. Godfather and Brown are rapped to the ring by Ice T, who I try to block out as most of the time these live intros are awful. Brown is a co-pimp here.

Remember the catchy Godfather entrance? This isn’t close to it. Ice T does some song that includes the lyric Pimp Or Die. Something sound bad about that? This intro goes on WAY too long and sums up what I hate about rap: this whole thing is just loud and stupid sounding. It was built to market a CD called Aggression which was a rap album of WWF entrance themes. In case you can’t guess, it bombed.

After that completely pointless intro, Godfather decides he has to do his awful intro, saying for everyone to smoke a blunt and say it ain’t easy. FINALLY Bossman’s terribly bland theme music plays and the pain in my head goes away a little bit. Godfather has really stupid looking dreadlocks here and is somehow dumber looking than usual.

There’s really no reason as to why these two are feuding in case you thought there was. Is it possible that D’Lo Brown is the most successful of these four men? I do believe he is and that’s a scary thought. Anyway let’s get to this. Brown vs. Buchanan to start us off with Brown controlling so far. Godfather takes Boss Man’s interfering head off while Brown is on offense.

Off to the pimp now as the fans want puppies. Big elbow misses as we talk about JR wearing some of Godfather’s clothes for some reason. Basically Boss Man dominates when he’s in and Buchanan can do one move, that running up the corner into a spinning clothesline. Blind tag brings in the Boss Man who gets two on Brown as Godfather saves.

Axe kick by Buchanan gets two. Brown and Boss Man on the floor now and Godfather accidentally clotheslines the referee. I say accidentally as the referee doesn’t even go down so it wasn’t the point obviously. Boss Man gets two on Brown who is the face in peril here. Buchanan with a bearhug now as the fans chant for D’lo.

Naturally that doesn’t do it but an elbow takes down Brown. Double teaming by the guys in black as Godfather just looks stupid. Boss Man sucks chant starts up. The beating goes on for awhile with Buchanan hitting a double axe off the top. We talk about Pete Rose for a bit and apparently he’s got a ball bat with him just in case.

Godfather shakes the ropes to crotch Godfather and Brown busts out a rana to break the momentum. Here’s Godfather who cleans some house. Ho Train hits Boss Man in the corner sets up the Lo Down from Brown. Bull pushes him off the top though but Brown lands on his feet. Boss Man Slam kills D’lo though and a guillotine leg drop from Buchanan ends this.
Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible but at the same time it’s Godfather/Brown vs. Boss Man/Buchanan. It’s not a terrible match but is this really what you want to open Mania? Also, a heel team winning the opener? Just not a great idea especially after the crowd got fired up for the rapping. Not bad but just odd.

Steph and HHH are in their office talking about how great their lives are.

The referees explain the rules of the Hardcore Battle Royal tonight. It’s a 15 minute time limit. There’s no limit to the amount of title changes in that period. Apparently the 24/7 rule is waved after tonight. I think Crash has to be pinned to get the title off of him.
Hardcore Title: Battle Royal

Hardcore Holly, Crash Holly, Tazz, Viscera, Joey Abs, Rodney, Pete Gas, Taka Michinoku, Funaki, Thrasher, Mosh, Farrooq, Bradshaw
The idea here was that the Hardcore Title was defended 24/7, as long as the challenger had a referee with him. This led to some interesting situations such as pin falls as amusement parks, hotels, etc. You have 13 guys here and whoever gets the last pinfall leaves with the belt, which would be kind of pointless as the 24/7 rule would be in effect so he could get attacked seconds after it ended right? It’s not really a battle royal but rather a 13 man match.

There are weapons at ringside and thankfully a lot of the guys come out in groups or teams to save some time. The Posse gets a small pop. The APA gets the biggest pop by far. Here we go. Remember there are 15 minutes to this period. Everyone but Crash and Taz go to the floor almost immediately and Tazz gets a suplex on Crash to win the title in maybe a minute. Now they have to pin him to get the title, which Viscera does with a splash. We’re not even at 13 minutes left yet.

Everyone is on the floor now and someone has a box fan. There’s a flag in there. The Posse of all people jump Viscera and they actually work for a bit. Lots of weapon shots to Viscera, mainly from the APA. Crash is busted open. They’ve taken the clock off the screen now because they want us to have to think I guess. Crash, ever the lunkhead, tries to jump the future Big Daddy V.

The crowd is kind of dead as they’re just hitting each other with weapons here. Bradshaw is like screw it and starts beating the tar out of people. Hardcore gets two on Viscera after a shot with a trashcan lid. Ten minutes left as JR says these guys won’t forget their first Wrestlemania. I’m not sure how many this is their first for. Taz is I think and that might be it. Funaki maybe?

We haven’t had a fall in like four minutes. 2/3 of the Posse and Viscera are in the ring now with Thrasher. Viscera beats everyone up with a cookie sheet. Farrooq comes in as Viscera climbs the ropes for no apparent reason. The APA get a double slam which doesn’t really keep him down. They throw Kai En Tai on top of Viscera and Funaki is called the new champion.

Taka immediately smacks him upside his head and the chase is on! Funaki proves to be the most intelligent guy here as he’s trying to run. With a little under seven minutes left some of the Posse catches him in the back and Rodney steals the title. Abs gets a suplex and gets the title. That was a 24 second title reign for those keeping count. Thrasher rams Joey into a wall and gets the title.

Thrasher then runs through a line of people who all hit him with weapons and we’re back in the arena now. Pete Gas finds a fire extinguisher and the third member of the Posse has the title now. Then Tazz grabs him and I think Pete is busted. Oh yeah he’s busted good. A T-Bone Suplex gives Taz his second reign of the night with a little over 4 minutes left.

Hardcore gets two after ramming him into the steps. Crash is busted BAD. Taz tries to pin Mosh as I guess instincts took over or something. Taz keeps kicking out. Both Hollies fight Taz in the ring with Crash not being able to do much at all. ECW chant starts up and we’re under three minutes. Taz stands alone and covers Crash with two and a half minutes to go. Eh it’s not a big deal. As a wrestler I guess you’re trained to go for covers.

The Hollies beat Crash down and both guys try for the pin. Naturally they end up fighting which is what they do in that family I guess. With two minutes left Taz suplexes Crash and Hardcore gets a powerslam on Taz for two. I love how no one else has seemed to care about trying to win the title and is just fighting. Taz suplexes Hardcore and he hits the floor, stealing JR’s candy jar.

Now we get to the weird part of this. Crash gets a weapon shot in on Taz and wins the title with about 20 seconds to go. Taz grabs the Tazmission but Hardcore comes in with the candy jar and busts it over Taz’s head (legitimately injuring Taz’s eye and costing him the push that would ultimately go to Chris Benoit). He covers Crash and the referee just doesn’t slap the mat for three.

What was supposed to happen was the clock was supposed to go out with Hardcore having a 2.99999 count. They messed up the timing though and the referee had to stop. They further messed things up by having Fink say Hardcore won the title while JR screams that there was a shoulder up. Totally not the planned ending but you have to do what you have to do.

Rating: C+. What were you expecting here? The idea makes sense and given what’s going on, the mistake at the end is very excusable in my mind, and since this is my review of the show, it’s excusable. It was wild and stupid, and that’s just fine. The match was fun and that’s all that really matters.

Video on Axxess. That still looks awesome. They have a small arena with matches going on, a commentary booth where you can sit down with Michael Cole and call a match, race cars, autograph booths, a Hall of Fame exhibit. Austin and HBK, two guys that weren’t active at this time, are there too. I’d love to go to something like that.
Al Snow is in the bathroom talking to someone in a stall but Steve Blackman is worried about what he’s planning.

We go from that to an extreme closeup of Trish’s ample chest as she says WM is going to see some T & A.

Test/Albert vs. Al Snow/Steve Blackman

This was a really weird angle in the tag division as Snow and Blackman were doing the odd pairing that won almost every match they had, but Snow insisted that they needed a name which didn’t go that well. Test and Albert were guys that Trish had handpicked to be her team. What you have to remember here about Trish is at the time, she wasn’t a wrestler and was nothing more than the hot manager. It wasn’t for about two more years before she and Lita took the division to new heights.

As for the match, before it we get Al Snow talking. One of the names he was pitching was Head Cheese, going along with his Head gimmick. Out comes Chester McCheesyton, a walking piece of cheese. Sadly enough, I’m not making that up. Trish leads their opponents down, but is WAY more muscular than when she started wrestling. If this is believable, she let herself go physically before she started wrestling.

Lawler messes up the headsets and JR is gone for a bit. Blackman and Test start but it’s off to Snow soon thereafter. Blackman tries to keep the Head Cheese chants down as this filler match goes on. This is a good show later on but these opening matches are pretty freaking bad all things considered. I’m watching Al Snow and Steve Blackman at Wrestlemania. Let that sink in for a bit.

Oh and JR is back now. It breaks down quickly as you can tell JR has nothing to work with here at all. There’s no point in talking about the match as it’s just about getting us to the end and that’s all there is to it. The cheese hits on Trish and is named Chester the Molester. Albert gets beaten down for awhile as this is one of the least interesting matches I’ve ever seen. This is what Raw and Smackdown are for.

Did I mention that this match is terribly boring? It’s one of those matches where stuff is happening in the ring but nothing matters at all. Crowd is DEAD here. It doesn’t help that the wrestling is boring. Double powerbomb to Snow gets two. There’s the boring chant. Bowling shoe tendency line by Ross. Head Cheese’s finishing move, the move that the Smoking Guns called the Sidewinder, gets two. FINALLY Albert gets a press slam on Blackman and the elbow from Test ends it.

Rating: F. Thank goodness it’s over. This was one of the least interesting matches I’ve ever seen and somehow it’s nearly an hour into the show. Just a terrible match all around and everyone knew it. Get on to whatever is next please.

The “good guys” beat up the cheese dude post match.

We get a horrible segment of Kat and Mae Young where Kat is sitting in a chair sans clothing and Mae keeps handing her things that cover up certain parts. Austin Powers was very big at this time and it’s supposed to be like that I think.

The Dudleys, still in their original AWESOME mode, say they’ll win and even though the odds are against them they’ll take things to a new level. These two more or less saved the division.
Tag Titles: Edge/Christian vs. Hardy Boys vs. Dudley Boys

This was before the name TLC was coined, but it’s the same thing with a bigger emphasis on the ladders. Edge and Christian were still chasing the belts at this point and the Dudleyz are the defending champions. At this time, the Dudleyz were so over it’s mind blowing and they were easily the biggest tag team in the world. There’s no backstory here other than they’ve been feuding over the belts and E/C and the Hardys have had ladder matches before. These matches never have much backstory but they don’t need to.

The Dudleys climb a ladder and pose during their entrance so the other two teams start fighting without them. All six guys brawl in the aisle until Matt and Christian hit the ring. Matt and Jeff look A LOT alike here so I’ll likely get them mixed up at least once or twice. These matches are very hard to call so it’s likely that I’ll miss something.

Bubba beats on Jeff in the ring until Jeff gets what would become known as Whisper in the Wind to reverse. Bubba Bomb and Bubba rules the ring. That may never be said again forever. The fans want tables as Christian goes up the ladder early. Matt saves as the ladders are brought in quickly. Crowd is surprisingly quiet here but after the first three matches they had to sit through I can understand that.

We start the violence though and the fans wake up a good bit. Ladders are rammed into people and pain is caused. Matt gets the screaming…elbow onto D-Von onto the ladder. Jeff tries a 450 onto Bubba onto the ladder but the fat country boy moves and Jeff nearly kills himself again. In other news, the sun came up today. Bubba actually hits the backsplash off the middle rope but hits his head on the ladder. FREAKING OW MAN!

Matt’s entire body is crushed by a ladder and then the same thing happens to Edge. They’re doing a lot more with the ladders here. Bubba does the Terry Funk spot as he spins around with the ladder around his neck. Edge/Christian beat on D-Von for awhile and then sit up a ladder in front of the ropes. Christian dives off and takes out Matt and Bubba. Nice dive indeed.

Jeff goes up but Edge dives off the top rope to spear him down. Oh man would that be topped by about a thousand next year. Edge takes a Crucifix Bomb from Matt off the ladder. Christian throws a ladder at D-Von. Why do stuff that is too complicated I guess? Three ladders set up now but Bubba takes Christian down with the Cutter off the ladder. SWEET spot.

The Hardys kill Bubba with the legdrop/splash combo off ladders. D-Von and Christian in the ring now but here’s Edge. The Canadians get a double suplex off the ladder in a great spot. Everyone but the Dudleys go up and everyone but the Dudleys crash down. And here comes Bubba! Here they go again, this time with all six of them.

Christian and Jeff go flying over the top rope to the floor as do Matt and Edge. The Dudleys wind up in the ring somehow but they’re a bit dead at the moment. Christian staggers to his feet and is sandwiched between two ladders. The look on his face in short says “That hurt a LOT!” Old school 3D to Edge, which is where Bubba runs parallel to him and then crosses over to catch Edge in the cutter in stride. It’s an awesome move when done right.

The Dudleys don’t have their catchphrase yet so they just get the tables. With two ladders already in the ring the ring, the Dudleys set up a table on top of them like a bridge/platform between them. The Hardys are back now to surprising booing. To the floor we go and Matt is slammed into the steps and HARD. This has been an incredibly physical match to say the least.

There’s a table in the ring in front of a ladder with D-Von on said ladder and a table in front of the announce table. Matt goes on the one in the ring and Jeff is in a powerbomb position in Bubba’s hands on the announce table. In stereo, D-Von dives onto Matt and Bubba powerbombs Jeff in a cool sequence. Jeff somehow gets up soon thereafter and tries his barrier run but Bubba PELTS the ladder at him to stop Jeff in midair which looked sweet again. Jeff has taken a man’s beating in this.

And now it’s time to set up the big spot in this match as Bubba debuts the super ladder in the aisle. There’s a table set up in front of it and Jeff gets laid out on it. Christian comes up with the bell to clock Bubba. Jeff gets off the table as Bubba is laid on it. And he begins to climb. In the HOLY CRAP spot of the match, Jeff jumps off the ladder and half kills himself with a Swanton Bomb through Bubba through the table. That was the top of Jeff’s highlight reel for a long time.

Back in the ring with D-Von kind of alive. Matt and Christian are in there too and are trying to stand. Twist of Fate takes D-Von down and Matt and Christian both start climbing. They get up on the platform but Edge is climbing up behind Matt. Edge throws him off and through a table which explodes on impact. The Canadians grab the belts and win their first tag titles to finally end this.

Rating: B+. This was a great match but there are a lot of dead spots in there. Jeff is easily the star of this match as he took one of the best beatings you’ll ever see with huge bump after huge bump. Somehow this would be topped the next year and this match would be blown out of the water. Great match and definitely picked up a bad show so far. I liked it quite a bit but somehow next year’s was that much better.

In the back we have Linda McMahon with Mick Foley. I forgot to mention, the idea behind the main event is that there’s a McMahon in every corner. Stephanie and HHH, Vince is backing Rock, Linda brought Mick back in, and Shane was Big Show’s manager for lack of a better term. Foley, with washed hair, says his fairy tale will come true, not his opponents.

JR and King talk about how great the ladder match was and they’re right. Considering that almost nothing like this had ever been done with so many people, this was beyond great.

Terri vs. The Kat

Val Venis is the guest referee here. To cover up the fact that neither can wrestle, the only thing you have to do here is throw the other girl out of the ring. Val’s pre match promos are always great. Apparently he and WM have things in common: they’re large extravaganzas, they get blood pumping, but unlike Val, Mania only comes once a year. And people have the nerve to wonder why the Attitude Era scared away parents.

Terri has Moolah with her and Kat has Mae Young. This is one of the major problems with great matches: after them, you get stuff like this. Terri truly was ugly to me. Val makes out with both in the middle of the match as this continues to cry out for someone to save the division. Terri gets thrown out but Mae is kissing Val. She comes back in and Terri wins. Afterwards, Kat strips Terri of her pants.

Rating: F. Didn’t care at all and it was terrible. A complete waste of time and an insult to my intelligence. It was like two minutes long and awful to say the least.

In the back we see Eddie, Saturn and Malenko getting ready to face Too Cool and Chyna. Eddie has a crush on Chyna but can’t get her attention.

Chyna/Too Cool vs. The Radicalz

This feud went on forever and no one cared. Let’s get this over with. All I have to remember is that the triple threat is next. That should get me through this. Oh well at least Chyna looks pretty good here. I’ll give Too Cool this: their music is downright catchy. Scotty vs. Eddie starts us off here. Eddie gets beaten down a bit and we get some dancing.

Chyna is tagged in and Eddie literally runs away on his knees. Dean, the Light Heavyweight Champion is here now. JR thinks Chyna looks hot. That’s just wrong on so many levels. Grandmaster and Chyna hit a double suplex on Malenko. Hey look: more dancing. Is that all Too Cool could do? Back to Eddie who avoids the top rope legdrop. Ok so it was more like Saturn shoved Grandmaster off but work for me here.

Grandmaster vs. Saturn at the moment. Saturn steals Grandmaster’s head gear complete with dreadlocks or whatever that is. Back to Eddie who takes over for a bit and it’s cold tag to Scotty. Eddie keeps trying to get Chyna’s attention which fails completely. Since she isn’t paying enough attention she gets her head rammed into the post. Good. Witch deserved it.

Saturn and Malenko get beaten up by Scotty and it’s time for the Worm. Oh but since it’s Mania it’s a double Worm to both Radicalz not named Eddie. Everything breaks down a bit as we’re still waiting on Eddie vs. Chyna. Nice superkick by Saturn to Scotty as we’re in a bit more of a standard match now. Elbow hits Scotty from the top for no cover.

Off to Eddie but he can’t get the Frog Splash off. Scotty drills him and it’s a superplex to put both guys down. There’s the hot tag to Chyna and Eddie can’t run away fast enough. Handspring elbow to Saturn as Chyna is cleaning house. Double low blow and Eddie drills Chyna. Chyna counters a powerbomb and gets a bad one of her own. She grabs Eddie’s balls and then gets a sleeper drop for the pin. They would be together the following night.

Rating: D. Well Chyna looked good and she got to beat on Eddie. That’s the extent of the good stuff about this match. It’s nothing special to say the slightest and is yet again another pointless match on this show in a long streak of them. Again though, the triple threat is next. Keep repeating that.
That day there was a thing called All Day Long which was an 8 hour countdown of WM history that cost an extra 50 dollars. Our cable company screwed up and we got It for free. Anyway the point of this is there was a contest with the winner getting front row seats and the winner is shown. She and her husband are the definition of white trash but it’s kind of a cool idea. They’re from Allentown, Pennsylvania, hometoiwn of the Nasty Boys as I show my nerdiness.

Shane tells us how awesome Big Show is. Show says he’s awesome and will take apart the other three.

Bob Backlund who is kind of Angle’s mentor made the match with both titles being defended in the same match/back to back. Kurt kind of goes insane and puts Backlund in the crossface chickenwing even though you can tell there’s no pressure on the arm. One of the medals breaks during this scuffle.

Angle talks to a security guard to try to get some extra security, offering autographs as payment. Much funnier than it sounds.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit

This is the match that everyone remembers from this show as well as being a very cool concept. Angle has both the European and Intercontinental titles and is defending both in back to back triple threat matches. The first fall is for the IC title and immediately thereafter the European Title match starts. With these three, are you expecting less than greatness?

The brilliance behind this is that even if one has a bad night, the other two are there to cover for them. Jericho is clearly having a blast on the mic here and says he’ll win something and be the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah no matter what. Angle is still the goofball heel which is some of the best stuff I can ever remember. Him being less than a year into his pro career is insane.

Speaking of insane, Benoit jumps him on the floor and the fight is on. They seem to be attacking Angle together for the most part but he fights them off somewhat. Benoit vs. Jericho now as this is rather fast paced. With Benoit and Angle on the apron, Jericho hits his springboard dropkick to take them both out to the floor. There’s a really annoying kid in the audience that is shouting about everything that’s said. Granted that’s not a terrible thing as that’s what fans are supposed to do.

Ross says Angle is great but talks about himself too much. Lawler: “So does Jericho.” Ross: “That’s a good point King. Maybe later you’ll make another.” No one ever accused JR of being the nicest guy in the world. Jericho is knocked off the top out to the floor where he slams into the table in a painful looking bump. Angle gets a snap suplex on Benoit for two.

Jericho knocks Angle to the floor and locks in a camel clutch to Benoit. This is too fast paced to call everything and they keep going back and forth. Jericho suplexes Angle and Benoit almost steals a pin. Then he does something stupid and tries to suplex Kurt. I think you get what winds up happening to Jericho. Benoit is sent to the floor and in some slick counters Angle gets a crossface chicken wing on Jericho.

Benoit manages to get a dropkick to Angle to break it up at the last second. He throws Angle into the crowd and hits the swan dive to Jericho for the pin and the Intercontinental Title. In a smart move Benoit tries to immediately cover Jericho but Angle breaks it up. All three are back in there now and Angle’s moonsault is crotched.

Angle is up top and Jericho tries a belly to back suplex. Benoit drills Jericho and suplexes him instead. Angle tries the moonsault to Benoit but crashes and everyone is down for a count. After some covers Jericho grabs the Walls on Angle but Benoit breaks it up. Angle wakes up and hammers away but Jericho takes him and Benoit down with relative ease. Double powerbomb to Angle but Benoit saves again. Rolling Germans by Benoit to Jericho get two as well.

Benoit goes old school with a Dragon Suplex to Kurt. Angle’s shoulder might have been up on the bridge so Jerry screams conspiracy. Jericho misses the forearm and drills the referee with it. Crossface goes on and Jericho taps but there’s no referee. Walls of Jericho to Benoit but still no ref. Angle drills Jericho with a belt to break it up which only gets two. Benoit misses the Swan Dive to Angle so Jericho hits his fellow Canadian with the Lionsalt for the European Title to end this.

Rating: A. This was great stuff indeed with all three guys working incredibly hard the entire time. It’s also a good way to get the titles off of Kurt without hurting his reputation. He would be world champion in the fall so he doesn’t have much to complain about. Excellent match and probably their best matches up to this point.

Vince is in the back with Cole as apparently the four way can only have eliminations via pinfall and it’s No DQ. For a multi-man match, that’s the best way to go. Vince says the McMahons won’t be a factor. That’s why they were the focal point of the match right? Vince says he’ll “make it right.”

HHH says he will not lose.

Kane/Rikishi vs. X-Pac/Road Dogg

This is pure filler before the title match, but there’s a story to it at least. DX is accompanied by Tori who is Kane’s ex. She was his first relationship and left X-Pac, allegedly because Kane wasn’t big enough for her. She’s pure sexuality and while she’s not the most famous or attractive diva, she’s one of the sexiest. The name Pete Rose is thrown around here as he might want a piece of Kane after two years of getting beaten up. Kane has been chasing X-Pac for months and this is about the best shot he ever got at him.

Well if nothing else we get the awesome Kings of Rock theme for DX. The more I see of Jesse James, the more I’m impressed. We now get Rikishi. Oh yay, it’s Rikishi. GOOD GRIEF I HATED THIS GUY. People, you want to complain about JBL being useless? This is the epitome of useless. If you remember earlier on I said there was no Austin. He was out getting neck surgery so the reason given was that he was run over by a car at the Survivor Series. No one knew who was driving it or who was behind it.

Austin comes back in the fall from being out nearly a year and the man hunt begins. Who was it? HHH, Rock, Vince, maybe even one of the new guys like Jericho or Benoit, looking to make a name for themselves? Nope. It’s Rikishi, the 400lb, thong wearing, dancing sumo wrestler. He debuted about a week after Austin was run over and while Austin was out, Rikishi rose to the IC title in a decent run and hit amazing popularity.

Then in the worst move I can ever remember, he’s revealed as the mastermind of the plot to attack Austin. They have a match and finally everyone realizes the massive problem: Austin can’t beat Rikishi up the way he usually does others because he’s too fat.

No one buys into Rikishi as the big bad he was supposed to be, so WWF pulled the blug at the last minute and said Rikishi was working for HHH, making him the true evil one. Rikishi was gone soon thereafter, thank goodness. Anyway, Kane comes out to end my hate filled rant. Paul Bearer in the red suit is just sweet looking for some reason.

Bearer and Tori get into an argument so DX double teams Rikishi. Kane has the inverted colors tonight which is awesome. Stinkface to Road Dogg as I think we have a comedy match on our hands. Stinkface to Tori is avoided to big booing. DX tries to run which doesn’t work at all. Kane finally gets his hands on X-Pac.

We finally get back in the ring and Pac kicks Rikishi’s head off. Pac vs. Rikishi is how we finally start it up. Bronco Buster by Pac and it’s off to Roadie. Pac in again and he can’t do a thing. Rikishi hits a one man 3D and it’s off to Kane. Road Dogg gets his head kicked off and Tori is thrown in. Stinkface for her and a Tombstone for X-Pac ends it quickly.

Rating: D+. Well for what it was supposed to be this was fine. Keeping it short was a great thing as this barely broke four minutes. Kane gets his revenge, we get the comedy stuff, Tori looked good, and then we get what the whole point of this is about: the post match stuff.

Too Cool comes out to dance but the San Diego Chicken comes out like last year. Rikishi comes in to kill the chicken but is intercepted by some yellow sunglasses. Somehow the dancing gets the best pop of the night. The chicken can move and it’s pretty clear that’s not Rose. Kane goes after the chicken but Pete Rose comes in.

Chokeslam to Rose and Paul Bearer does the crotch chop to him. Rose gets a Stinkface to FINALLY end this. I know it’s stupid, I know it’s childish, I know it’s idiotic, but I absolutely love these Pete Rose segments. The guy is having fun and gets beaten up three straight years and it’s still awesome. I loved these things and they still make me smile. Kane’s pyro is louder than usual and it made me jump a bit.

Rock says his time is now and he’s taking the title back. This is serious Rock and it works very well.

Some celebrities are here.

Quick recap of the title match. HHH was WWF Champion so he’s explained. He was feuding with Cactus Jake and retired him at No Way Out. As a favor to him in real life, WWF brought him back in for one final match so he could live out his dream of main eventing a Wrestlemania. Since he was officially retired, if he wins here he vacates the title and a tournament starts that ends at next month’s Backlash.

Rock was the last man out of the Rumble, eliminating Big Show. However, Big Show produces a video showing that Rock’s feet hit the ground before Show’s, so Show officially won. Rock had signed the contracts though, so he couldn’t be taken out but Show could be added, leading to all four being in here. Also remember the McMahon in every corner aspect (Linda – Mick, Stephanie – HHH, Vince – Rock, Shane – Big Show).

WWF World Title: Rock vs. HHH vs. Mick Foley vs. Big Show

Foley comes out first and you can tell he’s choked up. This was classy of WWF to let him have one last time and to let him accomplish his dream like this. It’s clear that the McMahons are the focal point here and is anyone really surprised by that? Big ovation for Rock here as this totally should have been Rock vs. HHH. I get the Foley addition, but did anyone want to see Big Show in there? I miss HHH’s My Time music. That was awesome.

HHH was at the absolute peak of evil here and he looks like awesome. If Stephanie’s hair didn’t look absurd, that bareback pink top and leather pants would work a lot better. HHH doesn’t quite have the water spit down yet. Here we go. Foley vs. HHH and Rock vs. Big Show to start. No tagging here of course. They say fatal fourway but it’s elimination. Foley is out of shape here as he more or less stopped training after No Way Out but to be fair he thought he was done.

Show beats down Rock and takes down the other guys with a double clothesline. Press slam to Rock which is incredibly impressive. Same to HHH. Foley jumps on his back so Show just drops backwards with him. Well why do something other than what works? Rock gets up and hammers away but a side slam takes care of that.

Show tries a chokeslam on HHH but Foley kicks him low. Foley and HHH hammer away on the Giant as does Rock. A trio of clotheslines put him down and they do a Horsemen stomp. Foley drills HHH out of instinct and they hit the floor via a Cactus Clothesline. Chair to the ribs of HHH as Shane trips Rock. Foley blasts Show in the back with a chair and a Rock Bottom puts Show out less than five minutes in. Was there ANY point to him being there? He would be a face in like a week which was good for him and us as we got THE SHOWSTER.

HHH tries to ally himself with Foley to get rid of Rock. That fails so HHH tries to ally himself with Rock to get rid of Foley. Take a guess as to what happens next. The double teaming of HHH goes on for awhile and we go out to the floor. Foley hands Rock the bell but HHH ducks and the bell hits Foley in the head instead. Out of nowhere Mick finds the 2×4 wrapped in barbed wire, drawing a big pop from the crowd.

HHH gets a low blow to save himself and gets the 2×4 for a shot to Foley’s ribs. Rock back in now and the 2×4 is dropped to the floor. Rock is sent to the floor and Foley gets a double arm DDT on HHH. It’s Mr. Socko time and the Claw goes on. Rock grabs the belt and blasts HHH so he can set for the People’s Elbow. Surprisingly though Foley grabs the Claw on Rock, only for the Rock N Sock Connection to take a double low blow to put all three down.

Rock vs. Foley for a bit now as Foley gets some near falls with the double arm DDT getting the closest one. Vince slid a chair in earlier but Foley gets it. Rock kicks it into his face though and then hammers away. He gets a DDT on Foley but HHH breaks it up, causing confusion from the announcers. Foley makes a deal with HHH to get rid of the Rock and the double team is on to huge booing.

Out to the floor where the double teaming continues. Mick gets reversed and his knees crash into the stairs. Those same stairs are rammed into the head of the Rock by Foley to keep Rock down. Rock is put on the Spanish Announce Table so Foley can go to the middle rope for the elbow. The problem is that he couldn’t jump that well and slams chest first into the side of the table, legitimately injuring his sternum.

HHH gets all mad and drops two jumping elbows onto Rock to break him through the table. Back in the ring Foley takes the Pedigree for a long two and a big pop. HHH shoves the referee down and then kills Foley with a chair to the head. Pedigree on the chair and Foley didn’t wrestle again for four years. Rock vs. HHH now for the title, but do you really think Foley is leaving that easily? He comes back and blasts HHH in the head with the barbed wire so that Rock can get two.

Rock clotheslines HHH to the floor and remember it has to end by pinfall. Out to the floor now and we go up the aisle. Rock gets a suplex up by the entrance in a cool looking crash landing. All Rock here. Into the crowd they go and then it’s back to ringside. Rock grabs the steps but HHH pops him with a chair so that the steps hit Rock in the head and fall on his chest. HHH hammers the steps with the chair. A Piledriver on the steps kills Rock but only gets two back in the ring. Big pop for that kickout.

Both finishers are countered with the Pedigree being backdropped to the floor. We go into the crowd again as it’s pretty clear they’re killing time before the finish. Back to the ring area and HHH smacks the hat off the head of an annoying fan. Spinebuster (called a takedown by Ross) on the floor by Rock puts both guys down.

We head to the announce table with Rock suplexing HHH onto the English announce table. You can tell it’s a big match when the American table is busted too. HHH gets a drop toehold to the steps to put Rock down. For some reason he gets in HHH’s face and Vince kicks some Game. Shane is back now and beats down Vince a bit.

Shane hits Vince in the head with a monitor and the look on Stephanie’s face that we cut to is perhaps the most unintentionally funny things you will ever see on WWE television. Stephanie is a lot of things. She’s smart, she’s funny, she’s gorgeous, she’s sexy, she’s a great TV character, but she cannot act to save her life and this is one of those instances. She looks like the guy from Troll 2 if that gives you any indication of how stupid she looks here.

Anyway, Vince somehow pops up from a monitor shot to the head within 20 seconds and goes after Shane. Keep in mind that this sequence, which has gone on for like two minutes now, is happening during THE MAIN EVENT OF WRESTLEMANIA. Yes, The Rock vs. HHH, perhaps the greatest feud of the Attitude Era other than Vince vs. Austin and the feud that would carry the comfpany to unthought of levels in 2000 isn’t enough as we need to focus on the McMahons and their drama. This is why this match and show are considered weak: it was about the McMahons and that’s it.

Shane manages to crack Vince’s head with the chair to put him down. They’ve literally not had the camera on HHH or Rock or the ring for three minutes now. They’re in the ring salsa dancing for all I know. Vince is busted open and taken to the back. There’s a trickle of blood which JR is saying is flowing by the quart.

HOLY CRAP IT’S WRESTLING TIME! Rock hammers on HHH and gets a DDT for two. Rock gets a slam for two as Shane has a chair on the floor. HHH gets a facebuster and drills Rock in the head with the 2×4. Shane in now but the reversed Pedigree sends HHH flying into Shane. Rock Bottom but Rock is spent. Shane is up with the chair now but here’s Vince as AGAIN it’s all about the McMahons. Shane goes down, Vince gets the chair, turns on Rock (SHOCKING!), chair to Rock, kick out, HHH gets the chair and drills Rock with it for the pin.

Rating: D+. Well let’s see. First of all, WAY too much focus on the McMahons. Second, this should have been Rock vs. HHH. That’s all there is to it. Also, a fatal fourway elimination match in the main event of Wrestlemania? That sounds like something from a video game. Also, when does a heel win in the main event of Wrestlemania? It’s supposed to be a feel good moment and that simply didn’t happen here. No clue what they were thinking here but it didn’t work like at all.

Vince and Stephanie reunite post match. Rock gets up and all three McMahons take Rock Bottoms. Stephanie gets a People’s Elbow after hers and it looked like Rock grabbed a bit of something when he was getting up for it.

Overall Rating: D. This was….bad. The show itself is mostly watch, but THIS IS WRESTLEMANIA. This isn’t Judgment Day….scratch that as Judgment Day in 2000 was great. This isn’t some WCW show where watchable is a good night. WWF was incredible in 2000 and this is probably the weakest show of the year by far.

I have no idea what the thought process was here but it certainly didn’t work at all. There are two good matches here and more importantly, not one singles match. What the heck were they thinking here? That’s a very good question that I don’t think has ever gotten an answer. Terrible show overall and it just didn’t work, especially for Mania.

 

 

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205 Live
Date: March 19, 2021
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Wade Barrett, Vic Joseph

Things have been looking up around here but unfortunately Curt Stallion has broken his wrist and is going to be out of action for a pretty long time. I’m not sure what that is going to mean around here but there is going to need to be someone fresh brought in. I’m not sure how likely that is, but stranger things have happened. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Ashante Adonis vs. Ariya Daivari

Barrett is here as a guest commentator and talks about what it’s like as a newcomer who wound up going all the way to the main event of Summerslam 2010. I love it when you get actual analysis with the commentator using their own career as an example. Adonis shoulders him down to start but gets taken into the corner for some chops. That’s broken up and Adonis starts in on the shoulder. A neckbreaker gets Daivari out of trouble and he hammers away but Adonis nails a dropkick.

Some right hands stagger Daivari until he sends Adonis hard into the corner. Adonis is fine enough to go up top for a high crossbody so Daivari has to duck the Long Kiss Goodnight. The spinebuster gives Daivari two and the hammerlock lariat is good for the same, with Daivari pulling him up. The Persian Lion splash connects but Daivari covers in a way to allow Adonis to cradle him for a pin. Adonis cradles him for a pin at 7:13.

Rating: C. I liked the match but egads they telegraphed the heck out of that finish in a rather bad way. They had an idea and Daivari looks like he screwed up by acting cocky, but at least come up with something a little better than what they did here. Totally watchable match, but the ending brought it down a good bit.

We look back at Jordan Devlin returning to NXT and jumping Santos Escobar. The unification match is on for Takeover.

Jake Atlas vs. Tony Nese

Nese cranks on the arm to start and takes him to the mat for a leg crank. That’s reversed into an armbar, followed by an armdrag into another armbar. Back up and Nese snaps the arm over the top, allowing him to shout at commentary. A kick to the ribs gives Nese two and we hit the bodyscissors (see how easy it is to use a hold that makes sense). Atlas manages to fight up but gets blasted with a clothesline for two more.

A belly to back suplex drops Atlas and a spinning kick to the face rocks him again. Nese grabs a bit of a messy torture rack but Atlas slips out in a hurry and grabs a brainbuster. There’s a standing moonsault for two but Nese nails him in the head again. The Lionsault gives Nese two but he makes the mistake of slapping Atlas in the face and talking trash. That earns him a discus lariat into the cartwheel DDT to finish Nese at 11:25.

Rating: C+. Atlas isn’t the most interesting character in the world but he can do a nice match like this one here. Commentary treated this like a big win but how many people can beat Nese before it stops meaning anything? The match was pretty good though, as 205 Live’s fairly hot streak in the ring continues.

Overall Rating: C. The wrestling was perfectly acceptable at worst here but the problem continues to be the villains. Nese and Daivari have been the main heels on this show for at least a year and we have heard the exact same story out of them more times than I can count. Beating them over and over is not going to have any kind of an impact and that was on display here. Why should I care that Atlas and Adonis got the wins? That just puts their names on a long list and that’s not helping anyone.

 

 

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Fastlane 2021
Date: March 21, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Michael Cole, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

It’s time for the show that doesn’t exactly seem like it needs to exist but actually doesn’t look too bad on paper. There are some matches here which could be pretty good, though you never can tell with a show like this. A lot of the promise might come from the fact that the expectations are so low, but take whatever you can get. Let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: US Title: Riddle vs. Mustafa Ali

Ali is challenging and also has Retribution with him. Riddle snaps off a gutwrench suplex for two to start but Ali gets in a suplex of his own. Ali wraps Riddle’s leg around the post and then swings him around to send Riddle’s head into the post as well. There’s a dropkick to the ribs but Ali stops to brag to Retribution. The bodyscissors stays on the ribs and there’s a dropkick to the back to give Ali two more.

Ali seems to be favoring his knee before he slaps on another bodyscissors. Riddle reverses into a sleeper but Ali flips backwards for two to break things up. A Pele kick knocks Ali into the corner and there’s the PK to the chest. Riddle hits a Final Flash for two more but the Floating Bro hits knees.

Ali’s tornado DDT is countered into a fisherman’s buster but Ali snaps on a Koji Clutch. Riddle finally picks him up and gently drops him down for the break, which has Ali smiling at Retribution. Ali talks trash and crotches Riddle on top, only to charge into a sleeper while Riddle is still on top. Riddle isn’t done though and pulls him up for a super Bro Derek to retain at 9:19.

Rating: C+. That’s how I like my Riddle: turning on the jets to run someone over because there is no way to keep up with him. It’s nice to see him crank up the seriousness every now and then and that is what we got here. Retribution has been done for a long time now an it wouldn’t surprise me to see them split up before we even get to Wrestlemania.

Post match Ali blames the rest of Retribution with Reckoning being specifically called out. Reckoning walks out and Slapjack follows her. Ali keeps yelling at Mace and T-Bar, who lay him out with a double chokeslam.

The opening video looks at the main matches and how everyone is trying to make it to Wrestlemania.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler vs. Bianca Belair/Sasha Banks

Jax and Baszler are defending and have Reginald in their corner. Both teams are bickering coming in because that’s a really popular idea around here. Banks and Baszler start things off and we’re at about nine camera cuts in the first five seconds. Baszler is knocked into the corner for the slingshot knees and Belair comes in for two off a standing moonsault. Belair blocks an attempt at a triangle choke with straight power so Baszler hits her in the face.

Jax tags herself in, much to Baszler’s annoyance, and the champs start taking turns working over on Belair. Jax chokes away and it’s back to Baszler to work on an armbar. It’s back to Jax for a cobra clutch but Belair fights up. A missed charge sends Jax shoulder first into the post and the hot tag brings Banks back in to clean house.

Belair comes back in with a 450 to Baszler but Reginald offers a distraction. After a forearm takes care of him, the Bank Statement has Baszler in trouble. Belair goes to cut off Jax, who shoves Belair into Banks to break the hold. That lets Banks and Belair argue some more so Baszler rolls Banks up to retain at 8:46.

Rating: C. The match was fine enough but egads it’s annoying seeing the women be either best friends or arguing all the time. It’s like they have two emotions to choose from and that’s not exactly interesting. On top of that, the Women’s Champion just got pinned by someone who isn’t going to mention going after the title because that’s not what we’re doing right now. Instead, Baszler is just going to be happy that she has a path to Wrestlemania. The logic and lack of planning from this company is astounding. Oh and what was the point of Tamina and Natalya jumping Belair on Smackdown?

Post match Belair and Banks argue again, with Banks calling her a rookie. Banks hits a heck of a slap to the face and leaves while holding the title.

Shane McMahon injured himself in training earlier today and is limping around with ice wrapped around his knee. Elias comes up to say he has an idea for the most epic musical performance ever at Wrestlemania (How many of those is he going to have???). He’s willing to do anything and Shane might have an idea.

We recap Apollo Crews vs. Big E. Crews has channeled his Nigerian royal heritage and is being more aggressive. He has attacked Big E. over and over again but Big E. won’t give him another title shot. Then Crews went too far and it was time for a showdown/beating.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Apollo Crews

Big E. is defending and the slugout is on in a hurry. The spear through the ropes drops Crews in less than thirty seconds with Big E. saying this is what Crews wanted. There’s the apron splash and, after a lot of shouting, another apron splash cruses Crews again. Big E. hits an overhead belly to belly and shouts about how much he has worked for this.

There’s another suplex but Crews kicks the knee out to cut Big E. down. A German suplex sends Big E. flying again and a frog splash gets two. Crews’ toss powerbomb is countered and they fight over a small package with Big E. getting a pin…..maybe…..to retain at 5:44. Commentary seemed to be rather unsure about whose shoulders were down.

Rating: C+. This was all action and while the ending isn’t exactly inspiring (How many times can they do the same thing with these two?), this was the Big E. that fans have been wanting to cheer for a long time now. I could see this version getting a heck of a push and that is a rather appealing idea. Crews looked good too, but it isn’t going to matter if he keeps losing over and over.

Post match Crews stays on Big E. with an Angle Slam and stands over him, declaring himself the Intercontinental Champion.

A guy named Joseph Average is giving out Old Spice samples. R-Truth is in the samples case and Average wins the title by accident. Then R-Truth wins it back and runs off, picking up the samples on the way. Akira Tozawa shows up to yell at Average but gets freaked out by his Nightpanther shirt. The Average guy looked a lot like Ric Bugenhagen.

We look at Shane McMahon getting injured again.

Shane is in the ring with Elias and Jaxson Ryker for a Wrestlemania preview. Hold on though as Shane forgot to mention something: Elias is taking his place.

Braun Strowman vs. Elias

Strowman jumps him fast to start and the beating is on in a hurry. Elias gets knocked outside where he and Jaxson Ryker consider leaving, only to get run over by Strowman. Back in and a Ryker distraction lets Elias get in a chop block and DDT. The top rope elbow doesn’t work though and Strowman this the running powerslam for the pin at 3:44.

Rating: D. Well thank goodness we get to stretch out Shane vs. Strowman, because that is something worth waiting on. I’m still not sure why I should want to see that match but WWE is not about to let it go until (and possibly after) Wrestlemania. Strowman winning makes up a tiny bit of the mess from Raw but there is only so much good that can come from the whole thing.

We recap the Kickoff Show match with Retribution seemingly breaking up.

Riddle bumps into Shinsuke Nakamura and tries to get him into the business of dressing up a scooter like a stallion with a bubble machine. Then he tells a story about his cousin Skeeter the skater hurting himself at the skate park….but Nakamura has disappeared. Riddle leaves and Nakamura is back.

Seth Rollins vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Nakamura is standing up for Cesaro after Rollins took him out. Rollins’ headlock doesn’t last long to start as Nakamura fires off some knees to put him on the floor. Back in and Rollins knocks Nakamura to the floor for a change, allowing him to shout about disrespect. Some shots to the back keep Nakamura in trouble and we hit the waistlock. A knee drop gives Rollins two (via a pair of ones) but he stops to shout about Cesaro swinging him 22 times.

Rollins loads up his own Swing but Nakamura sends him outside for a baseball slide. A running knee sets up the kicks to Rollins’ chest, including Good Vibrations. The middle rope kick is cut off with a shove to the floor and there’s the suicide dive to send Nakamura into the barricade. Back in and Rollins hits the springboard knee to the head into the Sling Blade for two. The Falcon Arrow is blocked and they slug it out, including an exchange of kicks to the head.

Nakamura sends him into the corner for the sliding German suplex but Rollins is right back with a Falcon Arrow for two. Back up and Nakamura hits the Landslide into the reverse exploder for two more. Rollins misses a kick to the head but hooks his foot on Nakamura’s leg so he can use the other leg to kick him in the back of the head (that’s a new one). The Stomp finishes Nakamura at 12:59.

Rating: B-. That’s the match you would expect from these two as it was hard hitting with both guys beating each other up rather well. There was zero doubt as to who was winning as we know what Rollins is doing at Wrestlemania, but it was nice to have something other than just going through the motions. By far the best thing on the show so far.

Rhea Ripley is on Raw tomorrow.

We recap Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre, with a focus on how far they have both come in twenty years. They had been friends for that whole time but everything broke down because Sheamus wanted McIntyre’s WWE Title. They have fought twice since then and now it is No Holds Barred to decide the winner. There was some cool stuff from Europe in there to make this feel a lot more personal.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

No Holds Barred and McIntyre has his face painted like the Scottish flag. Sheamus shouts (as someone has done in every match tonight) about twenty years to start so McIntyre suplexes him down. They’re on the floor in a hurry with McIntyre beating up against the announcers’ table but getting sent into the post. It’s time for the weapons, including a bunch of kendo sticks being thrown inside.

McIntyre takes too much time picking one up, allowing Sheamus to knock it into his face. Some stick shots to the back have McIntyre in trouble but he headbutts Sheamus down. Now it’s McIntyre’s turn to hammer away with the stick to send Sheamus outside. McIntyre follows but gets sent into the steps, which Sheamus then uses to hit him in the face. They fight to the announcers’ table with Sheamus being sent into the barricade and then into what would be the crowd.

The slugout is on until Sheamus muscles him over with a suplex. They fight into the stands with Sheamus not being able to hit White Noise. Instead Sheamus is sent through some of the screens for some sparks and glares from Drew. It’s back to ringside with McIntyre hitting another suplex on the floor to knock him even sillier. Sheamus is right back up with a Brogue kick but seems to be badly favoring his hip.

After shouting that Drew kept him from Wrestlemania, Sheamus hits White Noise from the barricade through the announcers’ table for the huge crash. They get back inside with Sheamus holding a piece of the busted table. That takes too long though as McIntyre hits him in the face and grabs the Futureshock. The Claymore finishes Sheamus at 19:40.

Rating: B. It went a bit long but they beat the fire out of each other and had some rather nice big spots. That’s about all you could have expected here as I don’t think there was any realistic expectation that Sheamus would win. This was about beating each other up for a long time and what we got here. Good stuff, and exactly what it should have been.

We recap Alexa Bliss vs. Randy Orton. Bliss is mad that Orton lit the Fiend on fire to get rid of him and started using evil powers on him. Tonight, she has offered Orton the chance to get rid of her for good.

Randy Orton vs. Alexa Bliss

The black goo starts coming out of Orton’s mouth during the entrance so he…..demands a towel. Bliss comes out and stands across the ring for the bell, so Orton charges into a wall of flames. Orton misses a charge into the post and the slow motion chase is on. Then a lighting truss falls and nearly crushes Orton, with Bliss saying it was so close.

Bliss sits on the bottom rope and Orton slowly gets back inside where Bliss blows a kiss….and throws a fireball at him. That misses so Bliss sits on the top rope as the ring splits open (seemingly with fire underneath it) and a gloves hand grabs Orton’s leg. The Fiend, now with a charred mask and clothes, pops out. Bliss kicks Orton into Sister Abigail and gets the pin at 4:39.

Rating: D. This wasn’t exactly a match and the ending is their latest venture into a horror movie. What else were you expecting here though? It was all about bringing the Fiend back so we can have the Firefly Fun House match at Wrestlemania, but I’m not exactly thrilled by Randy Orton’s Nightmare On Elm Street.

On Talking Smack, Paul Heyman promised more Roman Reigns destruction at Fastlane.

We recap Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan. Reigns beat Bryan at Elimination Chamber immediately after Bryan had won the Elimination Chamber. As a result, Bryan wanted a rematch under slightly fairer conditions, which he ultimately earned. This did not sit well with Royal Rumble winner Edge, who thought Bryan getting a shot first was unfair. Edge is going to be the ringside enforcer here as well to make things more interesting. Edge’s complaints are pretty ridiculous as he is guaranteed a title shot no matter what, but we need some drama because Edge vs. Reigns isn’t very interesting.

Universal Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns is defending with Paul Heyman in his corner and Edge is the ringside enforcer. We get the Big Match Intros and the canned noise really favors Bryan. Reigns powers him into the corner to start and Bryan needs to rethink things. The threat of a kneebar sends Reigns bailing to the ropes so Bryan goes for both legs at once. That has Reigns in the ropes again but this time he looks a little more serious. A cross armbreaker has Reigns in the ropes for a third time in the early going and they continue to circle each other.

Reigns’ headlock takeover has Bryan down but he counters into a hammerlock and talks about the importance of technique. Back up again and Reigns hits him in the face to take over, which feels like admitting defeat in the grapple off. Bryan picks up the pace and loads up a running clothesline but charges into a tilt-a-whirl slam for two more. Reigns stomps Bryan down and grabs a chinlock while talking about how his isn’t going to be broken.

Bryan gets thrown outside, where Reigns glares at Edge and sends Bryan into the barricade. Back in and Reigns hammers him down into the corner and tells Bryan to look into the camera and acknowledge him. Bryan manages a few shots of his own though and there’s the running dropkick in the corner. The super hurricanrana is blocked though and Reigns gets him into a Boston crab of all things.

Bryan slips out and strikes away before managing to send Reigns outside. A running knee from the apron rocks Reigns and a top rope knee starts in on Reigns’ shoulder. The missile dropkick gives Bryan a delayed two and Reigns isn’t happy. He knocks Bryan into the corner and unloads with right hands and knees, followed by the stomping on the mat. Bryan is right back with some YES Kicks and the big one puts Reigns down.

The arm trap stomps set up the YES Lock in the middle of the ring and Bryan pulls it back from the ropes to crank on it again. Reigns finally turns it over and unloads with heavy shots to the face to knock Bryan silly. Hold on though as Reigns has to stop to rub his bad arm, allowing Bryan to come back with the running knee….and take out the referee by mistake.

Reigns hits the spear so Edge comes in for very delayed two. That’s not cool with Reigns so he yells at Edge, allowing Bryan to pull him into a triangle choke. Bryan pulls him down into the YES Lock but here’s Jey Uso to break it up and drop Edge. Uso grabs a chair but stops to send Edge shoulder first into the post. Bryan hits the running knee on Uso and chairs him down but Reigns is back up with the Superman Punch.

The spear is countered into the YES Lock though and Reigns is in big trouble. Reigns taps (very subtly to make it better) to no referee and Edge chairs Bryan over and over. Edge shouts that this is his and leaves as another referee comes in, about seven minutes after the first one went down, to count Reigns’ pin on Bryan at 30:00.

Rating: A. Well that was excellent. This was a near master class in storytelling as Bryan was slowly picking Reigns apart with technique and the never say die attitude but Reigns just bombarded him with one heavy shot after another. I would have loved for this to have headlined Wrestlemania but alas it was left here where it won’t get the attention that it deserves.

The ending was annoying (as Edge’s stuff for needing the big moment after winning the Royal Rumble from #1 continues to sound ridiculous) but I get what they are going for. They absolutely have to go with the triple threat now and that should be amazing. Watch this match and take notes because it is one of the best storytelling displays I have seen in a very long time.

Overall Rating: B+. The big matches delivered and the bad matches were kept short, with the main event being a half hour instant classic. I’m not sure what more you could ask for out of a low level show that was over in less than three hours. I had a great time with the main event and most of the rest of the show was very good as well. It means almost nothing in the grand scheme of things and most of Wrestlemania is set, but dang this had some fun moments. Heck of a show, and that isn’t the biggest surprise.

Results

Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler b. Bianca Belair/Sasha Banks – Rollup to Banks

Big E. b. Apollo Crews – Rollup

Braun Strowman b. Elias – Running powerslam

Seth Rollins b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Stomp

Drew McIntyre b. Sheamus – Brogue Kick

Alexa Bliss b. Randy Orton – Sister Abigail

Roman Reigns b. Daniel Bryan – Chair shot from Edge

 

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: October 20, 2006
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,169
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s time for another guest stars show as John Cena and Big Show are here to scout for the upcoming Champion Of Champion match. That could make for a bit of a problem though as King Booker is defending the title against Batista following a #1 contenders match on last week’s show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

MVP vs. Kane

MVP talks some trash before Kane’s entrance but the fire cuts him off. Some right hands rock Kane to start but he shows MVP how they are really done. A shot to the face puts MVP on the floor but Kane throws him right back inside. That’s fine with MVP, who gets in a shot to the knee to take over. Back in and Kane uppercuts his way up from his knee, setting up a big boot. There’s the side slam into the top rope clothesline as JBL continues to not be able to stand MVP. A low blow breaks up the chokeslam for the DQ, allowing MVP to run away.

Elijah Burke vs. Vito

Sylvester Terkay is at ringside and Vito is a French maid this week. Vito punches him down to start but misses a top rope elbow as JBL keeps freaking out over the dress. Burke sends him into the corner and some elbows to the back set up the armbar. That’s broken up as Vito makes the comeback but spends too much time messing with the skirt, allowing Burke to knock him into the ropes. Terkay’s big boot finishes Vito.

Rating: D+. Hopefully this starts wrapping up the dress bit as there is little reason to feature Vito once he loses like this. There wasn’t much of a shelf life to the gimmick anyway and we are long past the expiration point. Burke and Terkay seem great on paper but for some reason nothing has clicked yet. That is becoming quite the trend for them and that isn’t a bad thing.

Gregory Helms and Matt Hardy talk trash to each other, with Helms asking how long it has been since Hardy held a title. Teddy Long comes in to give Helms a match with the Undertaker tonight.

Fans have seen the Marine.

William Regal talks about being a great wrestler who has held lots of titles but that has not been the case as of late. He has been focused on everyone else and that is stopping right now. Regal introduces us to his friend Dave Taylor, who is here to help him stay on track.

William Regal/Dave Taylor vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Funaki

Regal is in purple trunks for a change. A knee to the face rocks Funaki to start as JBL makes racist jokes. Taylor comes in to drop Funaki ribs first across the top rope and Regal comes back in for a chinlock. With that not working, Taylor comes back in to hit Funaki in the face. Regal does the same and a boot to Funaki’s face cuts off his comeback attempt. A knee sends Funaki into the corner though and Scotty is allowed to come in with Regal not even trying to break it up. Taylor hits a butterfly suplex with a floatover to pin Scotty.

Rating: C-. This was all about establishing Taylor and Regal as a serious team and it did that well enough. There was no drama here but it wasn’t that kind of a match. The tag division needs a fresh team and these two could work out rather well in that role. Let them try as they already have a chemistry and experience. Could it be that much worse than everyone else?

Video on Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

I Quit match. Chavo hammers away in the corner to start but the 619 chants bring Rey back up. Rey sends him outside for the big running flip dive and they’re both down on the floor. A posting puts Chavo down again, followed by Rey dropkicking a chair into Chavo’s face in the corner.

Back up and a Vickie distraction lets Chavo start in on the leg, which has a history of working against Rey. Chavo even ties the chair around the knee for a frog splash, which still isn’t enough to make Rey give up. They go up the ramp with Chavo staying on the knee, only to have Rey kick him off the ramp. The running seated senton to the floor hits Chavo again, which shows you just how high that stage is.

A Crossface isn’t enough to make Chavo quit so Rey chokes with the chair. He can’t follow up though, allowing Chavo to throw him onto some equipment cases. Rey gets in a right hand and climbs the lighting structure but Chavo knocks him into a Tree of Woe in the structure. Some chair shots to the knee are enough to make Rey give up.

Rating: B-. That’s the last you’ll be seeing of Rey until August as he needed another knee surgery. This was a heck of a showcase for Chavo, who really does not have a major win to his credit. Rey was World Champion about three months ago so this still carries some weight. Rey needed to go away and it was nice to see them elevate someone on his way out for a bit.

Gregory Helms vs. Undertaker

Non-title. Helms tries to dodge a bit but gets punched in the corner, taking the turnbuckle pad off in the process. Snake Eyes into a big boot connects but here is Mr. Kennedy for a distraction. That doesn’t exactly work as Undertaker sends him into the steps and drives Helms into the post. A chokeslam into the Tombstone finishes Helms in a hurry.

Post match Kennedy tries to jump him again but gets knocked down. The threat of a chokeslam sends Kennedy running.

Here is Miz to host a Diva Dance Off. The women come out but we need judges, so here are Nick and Aaron Carter. Miz brings up Layla having Big Dick Johnson dance on him a few weeks ago but gives her a hug to show that everything is ok. The women dance, Kristal grinds on Miz, he picks her as the winner, the Carters say it was Layla, a catfight ensues. More of the same from this stuff.

The Marine has actions scenes.

Smackdown World Title: Batista vs. King Booker

Booker is defending with Big Show and John Cena coming out to watch. Batista powers him into the corner to start before grabbing a headlock. Booker’s shoulder can’t take Batista down but Booker manages to send him outside for a cheap shot from a hidden Finlay. Back in and the Book End gives Booker two and Batista gets tied up in the ropes.

Some forearms to the chest and a kick to the head knock him to the floor for a crash Back in and we hit the chinlock but Batista fights up for the clothesline comeback. The spinebuster connects so Booker goes outside, where Batista drives him into Big Show. Back in and Batista hits the spear but Show comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure if there was even the first hint of drama to the result but these two still don’t have the best matches together. Maybe it’s a styles clash or something but it really doesn’t fit all that well together. The ending being a matter of time rather than any doubt didn’t do them any favors though and there was only so much that they could do.

Post match the big brawl is on with Cena and Batista taking Big Show down. Teddy Long comes out to make the tag match for next week.

Overall Rating: C-. Chavo Guerrero and Rey Mysterio saved the day here as otherwise this would have been one of the lamest Smackdowns in a long time. It’s pretty clear that the show is being put on hold until we get to Cyber Sunday and that makes for some rather dull television. The wrestling was ok but it didn’t feel like much of it mattered, at least not in the present. Totally skippable show, though Chavo vs. Rey was good.

 

 

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ECW On Sci Fi
Date: October 17, 2006
Location: Veterans Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Things are getting a little interesting around here and I’m not sure where that is going to go. Above all else, Big Show needs something to do other than prepare for John Cena and Booker T. at Cyber Sunday. I’m not sure what there is for him to do here, but we could be in for a fresh direction. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Sandman vs. Matt Striker

Singapore Cane on a Pole match. Sandman is already busted open before the bell and cuts off Striker’s early climbing attempt. Striker goes after the knee and hits a Robinsdale Crunch but Sandman cuts him off again. Another shot to the knee has Sandman down but he’s up again to meet Striker on top. Striker throws him down hard and he finally gets the cane (Tazz: “Like a little monkey!”). Some shots to the head rock Sandman but he takes the cane away and cracks Striker in the head, setting up a pretty obvious blade job. Striker realizes he’s bleeding and bails for the countout.

Rating: D+. This was an angle instead of a match with Striker not exactly being the strongest in the ring. Then again Sandman isn’t either so having them get in and out in less than four minutes was the right idea. Imagine how bad this could have been had they tried something more complicated. The fact that it was such a potential problem is rather telling about ECW.

Fans like the Marine.

CM Punk vs. Rene Dupree

Rematch from Punk beating him in a hurry. Dupree slaps him to start and bails into the ropes but manages a jumping back elbow to the face. A clothesline sets up the neck crank but Punk is back up with some strikes to the face. The kick to the head sets up the Anaconda Vice to make Dupree tap in a hurry.

Post match here’s Mike Knox to tease a brawl but he runs away before anything happens.

Rob Van Dam is happy to have his shot against Big Show tonight and knows he’ll do enough to earn a title shot.

Here’s Test for a chat. Test calls himself the Impact Player of ECW and brings up Hardcore Holly’s injury from a few weeks ago. After seeing Test attack Holly the following week, Test promises to make an example out of Holly when he comes back next week. Test says his ruthlessness knows no bounds but here’s Balls Mahoney to interrupt. Mahoney challenges him for tonight but Test says maybe later. That’s not how wrestling works though.

Test vs. Balls Mahoney

Mahoney starts fast but gets knocked down in a hurry, allowing Test to start in on the arm. A Stunner to the arm sets up an armbar but Mahoney is back with the snap jabs. The Nutcracker Suite gets two but Test kicks him in the face and grabs a TKO to finish. Short and to the point here.

Sabu vs. Shannon Moore

As we hear about the upcoming December To Dismember show, Sabu knocks Moore down in a hurry but can’t get the camel clutch this early. Instead Sabu hits a springboard clothesline to put Moore outside, setting up a slingshot dive. Back in and a running clothesline sets up a moonsault for two on Moore. Sabu misses a charge but Moore misses a Whisper in the wind, allowing Sabu to hit a slingshot Arabian facebuster for the fast pin.

Big Show talks about how lucky Rob Van Dam is for getting to step in the ring with the Champion Of Champions. Van Dam should thank Paul Heyman for giving him the show, because Van Dam has been ducking the champ. If Van Dam can pull off the miracle tonight, he can have a title shot. Show hits on the interviewer (Rebecca from the Diva Search) and leaves.

The Marine has action!

Big Show vs. Rob Van Dam

Non-title. They stare at each other for a bit until Show shoves him down. Rob strikes away and kicks at the knee, only to get knocked down with a hard shot to the face. A neck snap staggers Show though and there’s the top rope flip dive to take him down. Show crotches him on top though and we take a break.

Back with Show dropping an elbow and choking away, followed by a chop to make Van Dam’s eyes bug out. More choking on the ropes lets Show keep the pace down and a clothesline drops Van Dam for two. Rob is back with some right hands and a jumping kick to the face, followed by the top rope kick to the face.

Rolling Thunder gets two, with Show’s kickout sending Van Dam flying. A spear drops Rob again though (as it should) but he avoids a Vader Bomb. Show bumps the referee though and Van Dam counters the DDT into a chokeslam. Cue Test to stomp on Van Dam but here’s Hardcore Holly to chair both of them down. Van Dam hits the Five Star for the pin and the future title shot.

Rating: C+. Van Dam did his thing here and it worked out as well as it could have. Show is someone who is at his best when he stands there and does basic power stuff while the other person bounces around. That’s what we had here and Van Dam’s striking works well in the David vs. Goliath formula. Nothing great, but it did well enough, even with the interference.

Overall Rating: C. They kept the show moving as getting five matches in over the course of an hour is fairly impressive. Van Dam is about as good of a challenger as they have at the moment and while I can’t imagine him getting the title back, it is all that makes sense. The rest of the show was the usual set of short matches, which makes sense on a short show, but I can’t help wondering if it is out of fear for what these people could do in a longer match.

 

 

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I think we’ve talked enough about how unimportant this show is as even WWE has seemed to acknowledge it. They have gone out of their way to start advertising Wrestlemania already, mainly because it is taking place a mere three weeks after Fastlane. That is nowhere near enough time for a Wrestlemania build but at least they are doing something with it in advance. That means at the cost of Fastlane, but how many people are going to care? Let’s get to it.

Alexa Bliss vs. Randy Orton

Let’s get this out of the way early because this story has been awful. Odds are this is going to set up the return of the Fiend, or whatever the latest Bray Wyatt incarnation we’re getting, to get us to the final blowoff at Wrestlemania. I’ve been dreading this since the second they announced it because it is going to have a lot of supernatural shenanigans and that is not a good thing.

Since this is not likely to be a match but is billed as one anyway, I’ll take Bliss to “win”, as I can’t imagine Orton actually doing anything to her. I know it’s going to be bad and I don’t need to see it, but at least it’s better than watching Orton vs. the Fiend again….or at least I think it is. Anyway, Bliss wins the non-match.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Nia Jax/Shayna Baszler(c) vs. Bianca Belair/Sasha Banks

This is a tried and kind of true method of building towards a singles title match and thankfully we seem to have moved past the point of doing a title change here, as it would be one of the worse things that they could do. What worries me is the amount of Reginald that could be involved, because WWE REALLY wants to do that Jax Likes A Small Guy story for whatever reason.

I’ll take the champs to retain here, even though they have no other challengers and have done about all they can with the belts. Banks vs. Belair needs to be a story about the two of them instead of the two of them dealing with other people, so hopefully that is where we go after this match ends. I’m not sure what to expect going forward, but these stories need to be split up already.

Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman

Why? What did we do to deserve this, which very well may set up a rematch at Wrestlemania? I know Shane is a McMahon and that makes him one of the stars of the show, but it does not make him fun to watch in the ring. McMahon has been the face in this story since the beginning and watching him outsmart Strowman and beat him up on Monday didn’t help things.

For the sake of my sanity, I’ll take Strowman here, but I don’t think I have much of a reason to believe that is correct. There is little reason for this match to take place other than getting Shane in the ring again and the green slime deal did not make things any better. We’re pretty much down to hoping for a miracle with this one and that is not a good place to be.

US Title: Riddle(c) vs. Mustafa Ali

Redemption almost has to be coming to an end sooner or later a they have been on fumes for the entirety of their run. Maybe they get a boost if Ali can win the title here, but it’s not like anything else they have done has worked so far. The team is so far removed from its original identity that they don’t really even have characters anymore, so winning a title might give them a little something to focus on.

That being said, I can’t imagine they take the title off of Riddle so soon so I’ll go with him retaining and furthering Retribution’s problems. At the very least it would be nice to see Mace and T-Bar turned into a tag team as they could give New Day some issues in a hurry. That’s a little ways off though, as Ali has to lose to Riddle first, which is what I see happening here.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Seth Rollins

This was added during this week’s Smackdown and that means you should be able to see the path to Wrestlemania from here. Nakamura is standing up for Cesaro after Rollins took him out the previous week, like any good friend should be doing. That will likely set up Rollins vs. Cesaro at Wrestlemania, but first we have to get through this one and it should be a fun one.

There is no reason for Nakamura to win here so I’ll take Rollins as he gears up for Tampa and Cesaro. Maybe we can get the good Nakamura here instead of the coasting version, but given how he is feeling in this story, can you blame him for not exactly being thrilled? We might even have a great one in there, but I’m not exactly getting my hopes up for it this time.

Intercontinental Title: Big E.(c) vs. Apollo Crews

I want to like this one and there is a chance that we can get a good match, but everything will fall apart again as soon as Crews starts talking. I know that it is nice for him to have a character, but the combination of Coming To America and Black Panther accent is hurting what would otherwise be an interesting character. Big E. has sold the emotions while still taking a beating, so the potential is there.

I’ll take Big E. to retain here as I can’t imagine they take the title off of him that soon. Throw in the fact that Crews sounds so out there and it is hard to imagine the title changing hands. Crews is better than he was about a year ago, but I have no idea how far they think he is going to go without some adjustments. The talent is there, but as usual with WWE, they aren’t quite hitting the presentation.

Drew McIntyre vs. Sheamus

This is No Holds Barred and the Raw main event of the show. That’s not the worst idea in the world as these two have had some pretty awesome matches so far and I could go for watching them beat the fire out of each other on pay per view. There is a slight chance of throwing a monkey wrench into the McIntyre vs. Lashley Wrestlemania title match but that might be a stretch.

I’ll go with McIntyre here, but I can’t shake the feeling that they might try something. Lashley interfering would make some sense, though I’m not sure if that would change what they have already announced. We could be in for a heck of a fight here though and these two have shown some outstanding chemistry together. Let them do their thing and have the match of the night though, because that’s what they could do here.

Universal Title: Roman Reigns(c) vs. Daniel Bryan

Now here we have the match where I really hope they do change something around, because this should be Wrestlemania. Bryan has made me believe in him all over again with those awesome promos on Friday and it would be great to see him get the chance to do his thing one more time on the big stage. Unfortunately we are getting Edge instead, and he will be ringside this time as the outside enforcer.

I really want to say that they’ll pull a surprise here (not necessarily a title change, but something that brings Bryan into Wrestlemania) but I don’t think they will. Edge will get involved in the finish and I could go for him trying to spear Jey Uso and hitting Bryan to cost him the title. That’s pure fantasy booking, but Reigns isn’t losing here and he’ll retain the title on his way to Tampa.

Overall Thoughts

The potential is there. This show feels like it could be rather good based on the complete lack of expectations coming into it and that is not a bad thing. There is little reason to care about the show but if the action and storytelling are both there, we could be in for a nice night. Odds are they are going to be in and out quickly as has been the case with most B level pay per views as of late, so for once we can call this cautious optimism.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: March 19, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Fastlane and that means we need to add a few matches to the card. I’m sure you can guess a few of them from here, which may or may not be the best thing. The big match tonight will see Edge wrestle his first singles match on Smackdown in ten years when he faces Jey Uso for the right to be the ringside enforcer for Daniel Bryan vs. Roman Reigns at Fastlane. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Sasha Banks and Bianca Belair get in an argument backstage about Banks defending against Nia Jax tonight. Somehow this is about Reginald and Belair isn’t happy. This isn’t a good idea and she isn’t coming to save Banks. That’s fine with Sasha, who won’t need her to.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Nia Jax vs. Sasha Banks

Banks is defending and Shayna Baszler is in Nia’s corner. Baszler offers a quick trip to start but Banks is right back with a kick to the head and stomps in the corner. The double knees in the corner rock Nia again but it’s way too early for the Bank Statement. An elbow sends Banks into the corner and there’s a delayed gorilla press drop for two. Jax runs her over again and there’s a Samoan drop for two more. Cue an annoyed Bianca Belair and we take a break.

Back with Nia dominating and swinging Banks (in a powerbomb position) hard into the corner for two. We hit the chinlock on Banks but Nia misses a sitdown splash. A Meteora to the back of the head gives Banks two but Nia kicks her to the floor. Back in and Banks spins out of a slam into a tornado DDT to set up the Bank Statement. Shayna comes in and, with the referee holding Belair out, accidentally kicks Nia. Banks grabs a rollup for the pin at 9:30.

Rating: C. Not too bad here but it was all about the storytelling instead of the title. I really don’t need to see these four in another Tag Team Title match but as long as they don’t change the titles, everything should be ok. Just get us to Banks vs. Belair without the other two involved and we should be in for a better story once they get to that point.

We look back at the Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns contract signing which of course broke down into a brawl, also including Jey Uso and Daniel Bryan.

Edge is happy to be back in the ring tonight because Smackdown has always felt like home. The best nights of his career took place here but so did the worst, when he had to vacate the World Heavyweight Title. He is back tonight though and feels like Jey Uso could be a top start but he is stuck in Roman Reigns’ shadow. Tonight, Edge is teaching him a lesson.

Here is Seth Rollins for a chat.

Hang on though as we get a clip of Edge teaming with Hulk Hogan to win the Tag Team Titles nineteen years ago.

Nia Jax yells at Shayna Baszler about the loss. Shayna is going to get a match with Bianca Belair tonight and kick her head off.

Now we get back to the ring for Seth’s chat. Seth talks about returning a few weeks ago when all of the wrestlers were at ringside like he was a king. They don’t like him but they respect him, which is what really matters. Then they turned their backs on him because they are idiots, but Cesaro took the most time and stared at Seth, which was rather disrespectful. Rollins knows that it was because Cesaro is jealous of him because Rollins has success while Cesaro is an abject failure.

See, Rollins is a failure instead of a fighter and we see a clip of him laying Cesaro out last week. Rollins remembers Cesaro reaching out for that brass ring and found it great. Cesaro spun him 22 times and will never disrespect him like that again. Cue Shinsuke Nakamura (Rollins: “TALK ABOUT DISRESPECT!”), with Rollins saying Nakamura is more man than Cesaro. Nakamura tells him to shut up and hits a kick to the face. The threat of Kinshasa sends Rollins running. COME ON brings Rollins back in though and now Kinshasa leaves him laying.

Eric Bischoff is confirmed for the Hall of Fame. Much like Molly Holly, he doesn’t get a special video.

Street Profits vs. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio

For a future Tag Team Title shot with champions Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode on commentary. Ford and Dominik go to the mat to start with Ford getting the better of things. Dawkins comes in to hit the spinning splash on Rey in the corner and it’s back to Ford for a heck of a clothesline on Dominik. Rey breaks up what looked to be a Doomsday Device and Dominik grabs a hurricanrana for the fast pin on Dawkins at 2:52. Dawkins’ eyes bugging out is funny.

Post match here is the Alpha Academy to say the Mysterios shouldn’t be #1 contender, not after they already beat them. For some reason the Academy turns their backs on them and get dropkicked to the floor. A few dives take them out and the Mysterios bail.

Alpha Academy vs. Dominik Mysterio/Rey Mysterio

Joined in progress with Rey hitting a 619 on Gable but Otis crotches him on top. Otis comes in to run Rey over again and hit a big boot to make it worse. Rey manages a dropkick into the corner though and the hot tag brings in Dominik to clean house. There’s a hurricanrana to Gable and a sunset flip gets two. Gable cuts off Dominik and nails him with a suplex, setting up Otis’ middle rope splash for the pin at 4:48.

Rating: C. This didn’t have a ton of time to go anywhere and it seems to set up a four way for the titles. Odds are that will be at Fastlane, which would hopefully leave the Street Profits’ solo title shot for Wrestlemania. I’m not wild of A beats B, B beats C and then all of them get a title shot, but it’s not like the tag division is going to get much better of a story.

Classic Edge Moment: cashing in Money in the Bank on Smackdown.

Kevin Owens comes up to Sami Zayn, who asks about Owens joining him again. Owens suggests that Zayn is responsible for his own problems and asks who these THEY are that Sami keeps referencing. Sami has an idea: be ringside tonight for his match against King Corbin and see if anything fishy happens. Owens reluctantly agrees.

Here’s Daniel Bryan for a chat. Bryan recaps tonight’s main event but doesn’t think Roman Reigns should need Jey Uso ringside at Fastlane. Edge on the other hand wants to be there because he wants to face Reigns at Wrestlemania. Well Edge isn’t getting what he wants, because Bryan is making Roman Reigns tap on Sunday.

Cue Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman with Reigns laughing at the idea of Bryan making him tap. Bryan has a better chance of sprouting wings and flying off like a bird than making Reigns tap out. No one has ever made him tap out and he would rather lose an arm than tap out to anyone. Reigns would rather die in that ring than tap out to someone like him.

Bryan says that’s pretty strong and says everyone thinks they are invincible and unbeatable until they aren’t. Everyone thinks they are untapoutable until they tap out. Bryan isn’t just going to make Reigns quit but he’s going to break him. Now Bryan doesn’t want Reigns to die, but he is beating him for the title at Fastlane. This was really good and just makes me wonder why in the world we have to have Edge involved at all. These promos are making him feel wedged in and that isn’t a good feeling going into the biggest night of the year.

We get a promo for Sami Zayn vs. King Corbin, which is called the least interesting match of all time. In the match no one asked for, it is the irritating force vs. the unlikable object. There must be a winner, but thankfully there will be a loser. Well that was funny, but why are they acknowledging that their match is bad?

Sami Zayn vs. King Corbin

Kevin Owens joins commentary. Sami hammers away against the ropes as Graves tries to figure out why this is billed as a terrible idea. Corbin is sent shoulder first into the ropes for two but the referee sees Sami grabbing the ropes. Sami gets caught taking the turnbuckle pad off and it’s the End of Days to give Corbin the pin at 2:03.

Post match Sami asks if Owens saw anything bad but Owens thought it was pretty good officiating and sometimes you just lose. Sami hits the Helluva Kick to leave Owens laying.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Seth Rollins is set for Fastlane.

We look back at Apollo Crews attacking Big E. again last week.

We get a sitdown, split screen interview between Big E. and Apollo Crews. Big E. says Crews wants to talk about reconciliation and singing Kumbaya. Sounding like he is trying not to explode, Big E. advises Crews to enjoy his next two days. Enjoy the crispness of the March air and the use of his limbs because the beating is coming. Crews, with the accent getting even stronger, says Big E. should watch his tone. He talks about a story his grandfather told him about watching what you say, because he is going to win the title Sunday.

Big E. wants to do this now and takes the mic off to go find Crews. He steps onto the baseball field and steals a golf cart, shouting for Crews to come fight him. Big E. finally finds him and the brawl is on with Big E. unloading on him with a trashcan. This was some great emotion from Big E. but Crews’ accent/voice made it feel like a huge joke.

Fastlane rundown, with Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre now No Holds Barred. Shane McMahon vs. Braun Strowman is listed again after being dropped from the WWE.com preview earlier this week.

Bianca Belair vs. Shayna Baszler

Nia Jax is at ringside and here is Sasha Banks….who walks to the back because Belair has this. Baszler knocks her to the floor to start but Belair is back in with a rollup for two. Cue Tamina and Natalya to jump Belair for the DQ at 1:06.

Post match, Belair gets destroyed. Insert your head shaking and heavy sighing here.

Classic Edge Moment: Edge retires, vacating the World Heavyweight Title in the process.

Edge vs. Jey Uso

The winner is the ringside enforcer for Roman Reigns vs. Daniel Bryan at Fastlane. Bryan is on commentary as Edge shoulders Jey down to start and tries a very early Crossface. Edge tries to wrap the arm around the ropes but Uso gets in a shot to send Edge outside. Jey follows as Edge is favoring his ribs, meaning it’s a whip into the steps. A big dive sends Edge into the announcers’ table and we take a break.

Back with Jey still working on the ribs by sending them into the post a few times. Back up and they both try crossbodies to put them both down again, even though that was a really bad idea from Edge. It’s Edge up first with a middle rope knee to the shoulder for two, much to Bryan’s delight. A super hurricanrana takes Uso down again but the spear is blocked with a shot to the face. The Superfly Splash gets two and Uso is frustrated. Edge sends the arm into the mat and hits the spear for the pin at 12:08.

Rating: C+. Edge looked pretty good in there, which is impressive considering this was his first singles match against someone other than Randy Orton since Wrestlemania XXVII. They had a story going here with the ribs vs. the arm and while the ending wasn’t in doubt, it was nice to see them put in the effort on the way there. Edge didn’t look 46, but that doesn’t mean I want to see him in the main event of Wrestlemania. The new gear, with white boots for a change, did look good though.

Post match Reigns spears Edge and then hits Bryan with one of his own for daring to interfere.

Overall Rating: C. This was the blazing fast build up Fastlane show and while it helped for Sunday, I didn’t really have fun watching tonight. The biggest problem is there wasn’t much in the way of good wrestling, but at least they advanced some stories for Sunday and beyond. Now if only we can get through Fastlane already and focus solely on Wrestlemania, things could get a lot better in a hurry. For now though, just a decent show and nothing more.

Results

Sasha Banks b. Nia Jax – Rollup

Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio b. Street Profits – Hurricanrana to Dawkins

Alpha Academy b. Rey Mysterio/Dominik Mysterio – Middle rope splash to Dominik

King Corbin b. Sami Zayn – End of Days

Bianca Belair b. Shayna Baszler via DQ when Tamina and Natalya interfered

Edge b. Jey Uso – Spear

 

 

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Main Event
Date: March 18, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Kevin Patrick

It’s the go home show for Fastlane and that is not likely to be a good thing. The show is being treated as the most nothing event that has been seen in recent memory and there is no reason to assume that is going to change in any way with whatever happens here. Mainly because this is Main Event. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Lince Dorado vs. Akira Tozawa

Gran Metalik is here with Dorado, who drives Tozawa into the corner to start. A flying mare puts Tozawa down but he is right back up with a dropkick to the back. Tozawa gets two off a backsplash and hits the head fake right hand for the same. Frustration is starting to set in and we hit the chinlock. Dorado fights up with shots to the face and a hurricanrana, followed by a kick to the face for two. A high crossbody gets two more but Tozawa avoids a moonsault and hits a spinning kick to the head. The top rope back elbow gets two on Dorado but he knocks Tozawa off the top. The shooting star press gives Dorado the pin at 6:12.

Rating: C+. Well that was a nice surprise. These two had a heck of a match and that is not the kind of thing you get to say around here very often. If nothing else it is proof that the talent is there, but WWE has some issues presenting them. I know these two are not exactly likely to be given any kind of featured spot, but they are certainly good for things like this. Now could they do it on a bigger stage?

We look at Daniel Bryan beating Jey Uso in a cage to become #1 contender to the Universal Title at Fastlane.

From Smackdown.

Here is Edge to get things going. Edge talks about everyone telling him to acknowledge Roman Reigns, which is what Edge did when he picked him for the match at Wrestlemania. They were on a collision course but then Reigns turned down Daniel Bryan Boulevard. Bryan has been talking about how he deserves the Wrestlemania match more because it means more to him and he wrestles more in the last week than Edge has in years.

Edge thinks it’s time to remind people who he is, so we hear about the people he fought over his career, which has taken place in four decades. Cue Bryan to talk about how he thought Edge, as the Ultimate Opportunist, would understand Bryan going into business for himself. Bryan does love this and isn’t doing it to get one up on Edge.

Bryan was laying on the mat at Elimination Chamber and knew that this might be the last Wrestlemania of his career. He is going to do everything he can to get there because he might only have one more chance. Edge talks about winning the Royal Rumble, which included Bryan. Of course Edge likes Bryan, but Bryan isn’t better than him.

From Smackdown.

It’s time for the contract signing with Roman Reigns, Jey Uso, Paul Heyman and Daniel Bryan coming out to the ring. Adam Pearce asks who wants to go first and, after Reigns has his chair moved to the head of the table, Reigns says Bryan doesn’t want to do this. Bryan signs the contract and says last week, he made Uso tap, which Reigns never could. Maybe Bryan should be the self proclaimed Head of the Table!

That’s enough for Reigns, who immediately signs and Bryan promises to make Reigns tap too. Jey gets in Bryan’s face because he wants to be the enforcer. Cue Edge to say he likes that idea but he should be the enforcer instead. Edge proposes himself vs. Jey for next week with the winner being the enforcer. Pearce says deal and the big brawl is on. Edge shoves Bryan away so he can beat on Reigns himself, but Bryan knees Edge down to end the show. They might be messing with something here if they aren’t going to deliver Bryan vs. Edge, which almost has to happen somewhere at this point.

Rhea Ripley is coming to Raw.

From Raw.

Tag Team Titles: Hurt Business vs. New Day

New Day is challenging. Woods takes Alexander down by the arm to start and it’s quickly off to Kofi, who pulls Alexander to him with an invisible rope (ala Ryo Mizunami in AEW). A jumping knee puts Woods on the floor though and Shelton sends him hard into the steps. Back in and Kofi hits the middle rope standing double stomp, which is enough to bring Woods back in to clean house.

Everything breaks down and they head outside with Woods being whipped HARD into the steps as we take a break. Back with Woods hitting a clothesline but getting kneed in the ribs. The Michinoku Driver gives Alexander two but Woods gets in a shot, allowing the hot tag to Kofi. The SOS gives Kofi two as everything breaks down. Woods hits a DDT on Alexander on the floor and Trouble in Paradise hits Shelton. Woods hits the top rope elbow into Daybreak for the pin and the titles at 13:04.

Rating: C+. Well that came out of nowhere. New Day has held the titles so many times now that it doesn’t mean anything anymore but that has never stopped WWE. The worst part here is that commentary acted like it was a bigger deal that the team has momentum heading into Wrestlemania rather than being champions. That’s not how things should be working and it explains a lot of WWE’s problems these days.

Post match here are AJ Styles and Omos to interrupt. AJ mocks New Day for having another win but says he is running out of things to accomplish. He has never been a Tag Team Champion though, so he and Omos should be the next champions. The challenge is on for Wrestlemania, but Kofi wants to know if they are even registered as a team. Woods accepts the challenge and everything is set.

Humberto Carrillo vs. Angel Garza

They’ve fought each other so many times that there almost has to be something good here. Garza’s headlock to the mat is broken up in a hurry but he slips out of a headscissors without much trouble. Carrillo wristlocks him down but Garza is right back to work on the leg. That’s broken up as well and the springboard high angle armdrag sends Garza outside to take us to a break.

Back with Garza raking the eyes, allowing him to TAKE OFF HIS PANTS! Carrillo gets tied in the Tree of Woe for a running dropkick and it’s time to tie up Carrillo’s legs. That is broken up and Carrillo nails a springboard elbow to the face, followed by a spinebuster. The standing moonsault gives Carrillo two but Garza kicks him down again. The Wing Clipper finishes Carrillo at 10:34.

Rating: C-. I remember why I got bored watching these two fight for so many months. For family members who are both fun to watch most of the time, these two do not work very well together. Garza was the right choice for the winner, but it’s not like there is any reason to believe he is going to mean anything in WWE.

We see Alexa Bliss challenging Randy Orton for Fastlane, which has been made official.

From Raw.

Here are Bobby Lashley and MVP for a chat to get things going. MVP says we are now in the Almighty Era and Lashley promises to destroy McIntyre at Wrestlemania. Lashley: “Right now are in the….Almighty Era.” And that’s why MVP handles most of the talking. Cue Miz and John Morrison with Miz praising Lashley’s speech and saying they are all in on the Almighty Era. They think Miz should be in the title match at Wrestlemania because Miz defended the title twice in one night and had cramps both times!

Cue Drew McIntyre to say he knows what it is like to be on a sixteen year journey. McIntyre was knocked down off the ladder and claw back up and then they have both reached the finish line. MVP tries to interrupt but gets shut down and is asked why he is here. Miz interrupts and gets glared down, with McIntyre saying he owes Miz one.

They are facing each other tonight and Miz needs to run because McIntyre is going to Fastlane to beat up Sheamus and then take the title back from Lashley at Raymond James Stadium. The fight is nearly on but a Miz distraction lets Lashley jump him from behind. MVP and Lashley leave so Miz hammers away. Cue Sheamus to jump Lashley until referees break it up. MVP holds Lashley back.

From Raw again.

Sheamus vs. Bobby Lashley

Non-title and Sheamus sends him into the corner to start in a hurry. Some forearms to the back have Lashley in trouble but he powers Sheamus to the mat. A clothesline drops Sheamus again and the delayed vertical suplex does it one more time. Sheamus is back up and sends Lashley to the apron for the forearms to the chest.

Lashley is fine enough to catch him with the overhead belly to belly though and we take a break. Back with Lashley working on the armbar and sending Sheamus into the corner again. The running charge hits the post though and Sheamus gets up top for the clothesline. Some elbows to the shoulder and an armbar keep Lashley in trouble and Sheamus sends him outside.

Back in and the Irish Curse gets two and Sheamus grabs a kind of complicated leglock. Lashley fights up again and hits a Downward Spiral, followed by a superplex for the big crash. The spear is blocked by a jumping knee to the face and Sheamus grabs White Noise for two. Lashley doesn’t seem to mind and pops up with the spear for the pin at 17:41.

Rating: B. I know he isn’t the most popular guy but Sheamus can do a good power match. That was on full display here and Lashley is more than capable of hanging right in there with him. This was a heck of a fight that took a little time to get going. Once they started trading bombs though, it was good good stuff and that’s what you would have expected from these two.

Post match Lashley grabs the Hurt Lock on Sheamus but McIntyre breaks it up with the Claymore. Sheamus and McIntyre stare each other down to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The opener helped a bit but this week’s TV was a little bit better, giving them some better highlights to pick from. Fastlane continues to feel worthless, but Wrestlemania is starting to seem like it has some potential. They still have time to make it even better, and once Fastlane is over, things can actually get a little more focused. Pretty good show this week though and that’s quite the surprise.

 

 

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Main Event
Date: March 11, 2021
Location: Tropicana Field, St. Petersburg, Florida
Commentators: Kevin Patrick, Byron Saxton

We’re on the way to Fastlane and I doubt this show is going to remember it that much more. It’s such a strange time in WWE and that is the case every single year around this time. I’m not sure what we are going to be seeing this week and in a way that can be a good thing. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Retribution vs. Lucha House Party

Mace and T-Bar for Retribution here with Gran Metalik kicking at T-Bar’s leg to start. Metalik slips out of a powerslam and drops T-Bar to hit a top rope splash. Dorado comes in but gets pulled to the floor by Mace, who plants him down for two. Mace slams him head first into the mat and it’s off to T-Bar for a big boot. A running knee in the corner gets two and Mace grabs the neck crank. Dorado finally gets up and dives over to Metalik for the hot tag. That means the rope walk dropkick to drop T-Bar but he runs Dorado over in a hurry. Mace comes back in for the double sitout chokeslam and the pin at 5:03.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here for the most part and that is all it needed to be. I know it is way beyond the point of no return for Retribution but it’s nice to see the monsters being treated like a monster team. If nothing else, put them in the tag division and let them go after/pick up the Tag Team Titles. Would they be that much worse than a lot of the champions of the last few years?

Rhea Ripley is coming to Raw.

From Smackdown.

Michael Cole brings out Daniel Bryan for an in-ring chat. Cole recaps tonight’s main event and we see the graphic for the original Fastlane plans: Edge/Bryan vs. Reigns/Uso. Bryan knows that he is the one who will go along with everything and do whatever is asked of him, but that isn’t the case anymore. He wants to go to Wrestlemania, even though WWE wants to have Edge vs. Reigns in a battle of the eras.

Bryan throws us to a package on the Elimination Chamber and the ensuing title match against Reigns (plus Edge attacking Reigns later). Back in the arena, Bryan talks about how he has won three Elimination Chambers so you would think he would be cool with this. That’s not the case though because he felt like a failure because he did not make it to Wrestlemania.

From the floor, he looked up at the Wrestlemania sign and knew that he should be going there instead of Edge. He should be going because he loves this so much. Bryan has wrestled more matches in the last three weeks than Edge and Reigns have wrestled in the last year. Tonight he steps into a steel cage for the chance to go on to Wrestlemania because this could be his last chance. Cue Roman Reigns and company and we take a break.

Back with Reigns talking about how Bryan said he loved wrestling so much. Bryan doesn’t love this though because in reality he needs it. Love is about what you will do for others, not what you need to survive. Reigns does this because everyone needs him and that shows he loves it. The cameraman, Jey, Paul, the fans, they all need him. Tonight, after Jey beats Bryan, he’ll know it too.

Jey takes the mic from Bryan and says tonight, Reigns isn’t locked out because Jey is locked in. Jey goes for a cheap shot but gets knocked down so Bryan can stare at Reigns. Bryan was very emotional here and even stumbled over some words. Normally that sounds bad but here it made things feel more real because he was so fired up about everything.

From Smackdown.

Jey Uso vs. Daniel Bryan

In a cage and if Bryan wins he gets to challenge Reigns (here with Paul Heyman) for the Universal Title at Fastlane. They slug it out to start until Jey sends him into the cage early on. It’s way too early to get through the door though as Bryan grabs the leg, only to get pummeled in the head for his efforts. It’s time to go up the cage but Jey crotches him down in a hurry. Bryan catches his climb as well and nails a missile dropkick, setting up a running kick to the arm. Jey’s arm is sent hard into the cage and then does it again for a bonus.

Bryan goes up but Jey knocks him into the Tree of Woe and kicks away at the leg. It’s too early for Jey to get out though as Bryan catches him as well, only to have Jey hit a super Samoan drop for the double knockdown as we take a break. Back with the two of them sitting on top of the cage until they get back in and onto the top rope.

Bryan gets knocked down and Jey hits the Superfly Splash for two but it’s too early to escape. An enziguri sends Bryan down and there’s a superkick for two more. Bryan elbows away but Jey knocks him down again, setting up a catapult into the cage. They both climb up again with Bryan getting in a shot to the arm, setting up a butterfly superplex to the mat. The YES Lock goes on and, since the rope break doesn’t count, Jey has to tap at 12:04.

Rating: B-. They beat each other up for a good while here and the arm stuff was set up at the beginning and paid off in the end. That’s how you do a match like this and it makes perfect sense for Bryan to go that way. It wasn’t exactly a surprise as Bryan winning was all but a guarantee, but they had a good match to get there so it worked out rather well.

Bryan poses on the cage as Reigns glares to end the show.

Long video on Miz vs. Bobby Lashley (all three tries at it) throughout Raw.

From Raw.

Raw World Title: The Miz vs. Bobby Lashley

Lashley, with MVP is defending and John Morrison is here with Miz. We get the Big Match Intros and Miz drops straight to the floor. Miz snaps Lashley’s throat across the top rope but Lashley picks him up for a delayed vertical suplex. A missed charge sends Lashley shoulder first into the post and then Miz does it again for a bonus.

We take a break and come back with Lashley throwing Miz down with a suplex. Miz gets in a big boot though and a low bridge puts Lashley on the floor again. A missed dropkick through the ropes lets Lashley post him hard to knock Miz silly. Back in and the big spinebuster sets up the Hurt Lock to retain the title at 9:05.

Rating: C. This was exactly how it should have been as Miz got in a bit of offense but never felt like a serious threat. Lashley isn’t a hard guy to figure out as he can throw people around with pure strength and that’s what he did here. This worked well and Miz is dispatched from the title scene for good again.

From Raw.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

No DQ so Drew jumps Sheamus at the entrance. They brawl to the ring for the opening bell with Drew getting in an elbow to the face but getting knocked out of the air. Drew catches Sheamus on top though and they head outside, with Sheamus going into the steps. He is right back with a hard clothesline but the kendo stick shot only hits post. Sheamus is sent over the barricade and then back inside, with Drew bringing the kendo stick with him. A low blow on the way back in lets Sheamus grab the stick for a few shots.

The Regal Roll connects but Drew snaps off some belly to belly suplexes. A Russian legsweep with the kendo stick gives Drew two and they head outside again. Sheamus posts him and hits a spinebuster onto the announcers’ table and we take a break. Back with Sheamus hitting a spinebuster but not being able to get the Cloverleaf. Instead Sheamus goes up top but gets crotched, allowing McIntyre to get two off a top rope superplex. A chair is brought in but Drew blocks a shot and hits the Future Shock onto said chair for a near fall.

The Claymore is countered as Sheamus throws the chair at McIntyre’s head (geez), setting up a jumping knee for two. The chair is wedged into the corner but McIntyre sends him head first into it instead. Now the Claymore connects but it knocks Sheamus outside. McIntyre muscles him back in but the Brogue Kick knocks him off the apron. They both pick up steps on the floor and ram them together, which knocks both of them down in a heap. Sheamus is out and the referee stops the match at 19:24, presumably for a no contest.

Rating: B. The ending would look to set up a trilogy match at Fastlane so this was a twenty minute preview with both guys beating the heck out of each other. That worked very well and I could go for more of it, as these two work well together. Sometimes you have to go with what works and in this case, that is these two pounding each other for a long time.

Post match medics come down as neither of them can stand.

Mansoor/Ricochet vs. Drew Gulak/Akira Tozawa

Mansoor gets taken into the corner to start and the villains take over in a hurry. Tozawa ducks a running clothesline but gets kicked down in a hurry. A double dropkick to the legs put Gulak and Tozawa on the floor. A lot of posing takes us to a break and we come back with Gulak getting two on Mansoor. Tozawa gets in a slam and puts on a waistlock before Gulak comes back in for two.

Mansoor gets away and dives over for the hot tag to Ricochet to clean house. A spinning suplex into the running shooting star press gets two on Gulak but an elbow to the face knocks Ricochet into Mansoor. Everything breaks down and Ricochet hits a slingshot corkscrew dive onto Gulak. Mansoor’s slingshot neckbreaker finishes Tozawa at 9:35.

Rating: C. I could go for more of either Ricochet or Mansoor and that is a nice thing to see. They work well together and both of them need something better to do. Mansoor has become one of the better things on 205 Live and he has yet to actually lose a match in WWE. Go with more of that and they might have something with him. Ricochet….well he’s cool when you get to see him.

From Raw.

AJ Styles is asked about Wrestlemania but would rather talk about Randy Orton and Alexa Bliss. The Fiend is tearing Orton down bit by bit with voodoo magic. Cue Orton to ask if AJ thinks this is funny. AJ doesn’t, but he does find this weak. A match is set for later.

And also from Raw.

AJ Styles vs. Randy Orton

Omos is here with Styles. Orton hammers away to start and the threat of an RKO sends AJ bailing to the floor. Back in and AJ hammers away so they go outside again, with Orton dropping him onto the announcers’ table. A staredown with Omos lets AJ knock Orton off of the apron and there’s the slingshot forearm to the floor as we take a break.

Back with AJ working on the knee and then striking away in the corner. Orton gets in a few shots of his own though and a spinning clothesline drops AJ. They get back up and Orton catches him on top before also blocking the Phenomenal Forearm. The hanging DDT is countered into the Calf Crusher but Orton escapes and hits the hanging DDT.

Omos pulls AJ away from the RKO….and here’s Alexa Bliss on the screen. She plays her jack in the box but tells it not yet. Instead she lights a match and blows it out, which makes fire come up from three of the four ring posts. Orton coughs up the black goo and turns into the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin at 15:04.

Rating: C. AJ vs. Orton is going to be fine almost no matter what but the Alexa stuff hurt this a good bit. Part of the problem is this match came up out of nowhere, almost like WWE forgot that they had these two sitting around and threw them together to fill in a gap. You should have something better than that for these two, but given what Orton has been doing for the last few months, I’m not surprised.

Post match Bliss pops up again and laughs a lot to end the show. Man alive this story needs to wrap up already. I know it won’t be, but it needs to.

Overall Rating: C. Totally watchable match but it is clear that they are running out of things to do on the way to Fastlane. The show does not matter in the slightest and WWE is not exactly making you think otherwise. It was nice to have something a little different this time around, but that doesn’t exactly make for a good show. Less dull, but not good.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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