Smackdown – December 23, 2005 (Best Of 2005): They Did Something Here

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: December 23, 2005
Hosts: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the holiday season and since Raw was over in Afghanistan, it’s Best Of time. That’s a good thing for a change as the show could be a nice look back at a hit or miss year. Sometimes you need a little breather and not having a show two days before Christmas should help a bit. Let’s get to it.

We open with a quick video package on the year.

Cole and Tazz welcome us to the show and talk about what a great year it was.

We’ll start off with the biggest name around.

From Wrestlemania XXI.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Batista

HHH is defending and has Ric Flair with him, plus Motorhead plays him to the ring, just in case you thought Batista was cooler. I mean, you can barely understand the words because Lemmy butchers it in a great Brutus Beefcake impression but HHH rising up through the stage makes up for it a bit. Batista doesn’t get much of a pop, mainly due to the lack of the famous band performing his music.

The early power lockup lets them drive each other to the ropes but it’s only good for a standoff. They do it again with HHH’s running shoulder having no effect other than waking HHH up a bit. Another shoulder drops Batista but he’s right back up with something close to a powerslam. Batista hits a backdrop, only to have HHH knock him outside to cut the momentum off again.

Flair’s distraction lets HHH send Batista into the steps and Flair gets in some choking with the jacket. Back in and HHH gets two off a suplex, setting up more Flair choking. Whatever emotion the fans had for Batista after that HHH entrance is long gone now as HHH has beaten him down for about seven of the eight minutes the match has been going so far. Batista slugs away but walks into the spinebuster, because of course HHH needs to hit a spinebuster as he dominates Batista in the biggest match of Batista’s career.

A backdrop breaks up the Pedigree attempt but HHH is RIGHT BACK with the facebuster, leaving him on defense for all of three seconds. HHH goes up and gets clotheslined out of the air to no reaction as the fans are gone. They’re smart enough to realize that HHH is going to cut Batista off again and, as expected, Batista charges into a big boot in the corner just a few seconds later. Batista sends HHH over the corner, only to have HHH whip him into the steps.

The Pedigree onto the steps is countered into a catapult into the post and we’ve got some blood. Back in and it’s time to hammer on the cut as the fans finally have something to cheer about. The big running clothesline in the corner rocks HHH and a powerslam gets two as there isn’t quite the energy in the offense that you would expect. It feels like they’re just doing stuff to fill time until the ending instead of of building something up.

Batista sends him outside but goes after Flair, allowing HHH to grab the chair, which hits the referee by mistake. Flair’s belt shot is countered with a spinebuster but HHH’s belt shot gets two. The fans react to the kickout and Batista hits the spinebuster for the big reaction. That’s too much cheering for HHH’s liking so he hits Batista low. Batista blocks the Pedigree with raw power though and hits something like White Noise. The Batista Bomb finally makes Batista champion.

Rating: C. It was miles better than Cena vs. JBL but egads this didn’t do Batista any favors. This was more about giving HHH a big sendoff as champion than making Batista look like a star and….I can’t say I’m surprised. Batista has looked so dominant and smart for the last six weeks that HHH probably couldn’t help himself from cutting him off. HHH did put him over, but it could have been a lot stronger without HHH beating him up and outsmarting him for the first half of the match. Much like the previous match though, it’s all about what comes next rather than what happened here, but HHH made sure to make himself look good.

We take a quick look at JBL’s Celebration of Excellence on February 24.

From April 28.

Booker T. vs. Big Show vs. John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Kurt Angle

Elimination rules for the #1 contendership and Orlando Jordan is here with JBL. Angle already has the straps down so you know this is serious. The brawl is on in a hurry to start with Show cleaning house, even knocking away a German suplex attempt. A legdrop crushes JBL and sends Booker flying off a toss. Show crushes all three of them in the corner but Angle pops out with an Angle Slam for one.

Booker adds the ax kick for two and the Clothesline From JBL gets the same. They knock Show outside for the huge Angle Slam through the table….and a countout for the elimination. In a four way? That’s a creative way to get rid of him, even if it goes against the general rules of the match. We take a break and come back with Booker fighting out of the corner but crotching himself off a missed sidekick.

A whip into the steps slows JBL down and Angle suplexes Booker for two. JBL comes back in and walks into a Book End for two but Angle is right back with the rolling German suplexes for the same on Booker. Neither the Angle Slam or the Book End can connect so Angle picks the ankle. That’s broken up as well so Angle hits the Slam for two more. Booker’s superkick gets his own near fall as Jordan slides in a chair. That earns him an ejection and the distraction lets Angle chair Booker in the head for the second elimination to get us down to one on one.

We take another break and come back with JBL slightly cut open and Angle fighting out of a chinlock. The ankle lock goes on but gets broken up just as quickly and there’s the fall away slam. The Clothesline hits the referee though, just as Angle gets the ankle lock. JBL calls out the Bashams for the save so it’s a bunch of suplexes all around. That includes some rolling German suplexes to JBL and the ankle lock gets the tap, which no one sees. Cue Booker to chair Angle down, allowing JBL to steal the pin and the title shot.

Rating: B-. Booker vs. Angle made this work rather well, even when the ending was as obvious as you could have gotten. They have made no secret about the fact that this was JBL’s win the entire way and that’s fine. It makes the most sense and you can have the other three get title shots later on if they want to. Not a great match, but it got around the clear finish and that’s kind of hard to do.

Long video on Tribute to the Troops.

From January 6.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rey Mysterio

Fallout from last week’s Tag Team Title match. Rey brings out the 619 Cam but Eddie steals it for some filming of guest timekeeper Joy Giovanni. We get started with Rey snapping off a headscissors but getting caught in a test of strength. That’s broken up with Rey climbing onto Eddie’s back for two off a sunset flip, meaning it’s an early standoff. Back up and it’s another headscissors to rattle Eddie some more.

Rey charges again but this time he gets faceplanted down, setting up an armbar on the right (not left Cole) arm. The hammerlock goes on for a good bit until Rey makes the rope, with Eddie not letting go immediately. Rey tries a moonsault but gets caught in the Tree of Woe for a dropkick to the ribs. Eddie misses a charge though and crotches himself against the post as we take a break.

Back with Rey holding something like an abdominal stretch on the mat before switching to an armbar. An exchange of sleepers goes to Rey, followed by a springboard armdrag. Rey gets two off a Lionsault and we hit the chinlock. That’s broken up so Rey dropkicks him into the ropes, only to miss the 619. Eddie chills in the corner so Rey tries a Bronco Buster, which is blocked with a raised boot.

It was NOT a low blow though (Eddie promises) so Rey takes him up top but the hurricanrana is countered into a powerbomb. A missed charge bumps the referee though and Eddie has an idea. It’s the old grab the title spot so he throws it to Rey….who throws it right back and drops down as the referee gets up.

Eddie crawls around on his stomach to hide the title and INSISTS that he did not use the belt. He tries to crawl over and throw it away but gets caught, giving us a hilarious look on his face. Rey cracks up and Eddie tries to convince the referee that it means Rey did it. That’s almost a double DQ but Eddie’s begging keeps the match going….and lets Rey small package him for the pin.

Rating: B-. Well of course these two had a fun match, but the ending was hysterical with Eddie going so over the top when he had no idea what to do in the situation. His NO and HE’S LAUGHING got some actual laughter and they did it for the right reason. How often do you get that in wrestling?

Cole and Tazz talk about how they will miss Eddie.

We get the Here Without You video on Eddie, which is still incredible.

Video on the Boogeyman.

Video on the new talent who came to the show this year.

We look at Chris Benoit winning the US Title in less than thirty seconds at Summerslam.

Cole and Tazz talk about Booker vs. Benoit, with Cole referring to Sharmell as Booker’s “Lovely wife I guess you’d call her.” Tazz: “It is his wife.”

From October 21, 2005.

US Title: Chris Benoit vs. Booker T.

Benoit is defending and Sharmell is here with Booker. They fight over a lockup to start and it’s a clean break in the corner. Booker actually wrestles him down but Benoit slips out and catches him with a hiptoss. Back up and Benoit’s hammerlock doesn’t get him far as they go into the corner for some chops. Booker misses the side kick though and crashes out to the floor, only to avoid Benoit’s dive to send him into the announcers’ table.

Back from a break with Booker holding a chinlock and whipping him hard into the corner for two. The chinlock goes on again so Benoit fights up again and hits a running forearm for two of his own. It’s time to roll the German suplexes to freak Sharmell out again. The Swan Dive gives Benoit two but Booker is back up with a kick to the face. That lets him head up top but Benoit superplexes him down, albeit with a slip on the way. The referee checks on Booker, allowing Sharmell to hit him low. Booker nails the ax kick for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. It’s the expected good match between these two, though the Sharmell stuff was as annoying as ever. She’s a heel, but she’s the kind of heel where she’s more pesky than evil. Benoit feels like a transitional champion as he spent most of his reign beating up Orlando Jordan in thirty seconds so the loss doesn’t mean much. At least Sharmell will have something else to complain about now.

We recap Sharmell yelling at Booker to motivate him, setting up the heel turn and US Title win.

From Survivor Series.

Team Raw vs. Team Smackdown

Raw: Shawn Michaels, Kane, Big Show, Carlito, Chris Masters

Smackdown: Batista, Bobby Lashley, John Bradshaw Layfield, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio

Entrances take forever of course and Rey gets some very loud EDDIE chants. Orton takes Shawn into the corner to start and then does it again for a bonus. Shawn gets in a whip to the other corner to set up some chops as commentary is already bickering. Orton gets in a slam but misses the knee drop so it’s off to Masters. The knee the face works fine on him but it’s quickly off to Lashley, who tosses Masters around.

Carlito gets the tag so Lashley pulls him in and hits a running powerslam for two. It’s back to Shawn, who gets knocked down as well. There’s the Dominator to Carlito but Kane saves Shawn from the same fate. A Kane chokeslam from the apron lets Shawn get rid of Lashley, who wasn’t nearly the factor you would have bet on after the last few weeks. Rey comes in and dropkicks Shawn in the knee as Cole says he’d love to see this dream match. I know he has a short attention span but he can’t remember something from less than two weeks ago?

Kane comes in and gets dropkicked down but is right back up for a big boot. A backbreaker gets two on Rey and we hit the backbreaker. Rey fights out in a hurry though and it’s off to Batista for the shoulders in the corner. A spear into the spinebuster gets rid of Kane but here’s Show for an immediate chokeslam. That’s good for two but Kane is back up for a double chokeslam to get rid of Batista. JBL’s middle rope shoulder is pulled out of the air by Big Show but Orton snaps his throat across the top.

The Clothesline From JBL into the 619 into the RKO into another Clothesline From JBL into the springboard seated senton FINALLY gets rid of Big Show and we’re down to 3-3. Everything breaks down and JBL hits Shawn with a fall away slam on the floor as Masters plants Rey. Carlito comes in for a legdrop and the chinlock goes on. Rey fights up and gets a blind tag from JBL, who blasts Carlito with the Clothesline for the pin.

Masters comes in next and gets hammered down as Shawn is still out on the floor. Rey comes back in and avoids a charge into the post, setting up the 619. Dropping the Dime gets rid of Masters and it’s down to Shawn vs. Orton/Mysterio/JBL. Rey throws Shawn back in and hits the 619 but the West Coast Pop is Sweet Chin Musiced out of the air for the pin. JBL tries the Clothesline but Shawn ducks and superkicks him out for the back to back pins in about fifteen seconds.

That leaves us with Shawn vs. Orton but neither finisher can hit. Orton bails to the floor so Shawn hits a slingshot dive as the fans want Undertaker. Back in and Shawn hits the forearm into the nipup but JBL is still here and brings in a chair. That earns him another superkick but Shawn walks into the RKO for the final pin.

Rating: B. This was good enough and was absolutely the main event of the show. Even though this was for completely meaningless bragging rights, it worked this time because that was something fresh. It’s the difference between doing it once and doing it every year: this time felt like they had built something up instead of throwing it out there because it was November. It also helps when you have Shawn at his best playing the underdog and Orton being great at this match. This nearly identical formula worked in 2003 and it worked here too.

Post match the Smackdown locker room comes in to celebrate….and we’ve got druids. They bring out a casket and stand it upright as the gong hits. Lightning strikes the casket and it is lit on fire, with Undertaker walking out. Undertaker destroys the roster as the Ortons get to the outside. The big staredown with the throat slit ends the show.

Quick look at Undertaker vs. Randy Orton, including the Cell match.

Cole and Tazz wrap it up.

Overall Rating: C+. They did a nice job of looking at the high points of the year, which is hard to do in the course of an hour. Of course they had to leave some stuff out (like John Cena being the star of the show for about five months) but they hit the big stuff and that’s what they should be trying for with something like this. 2005 wasn’t a great year, but they made it look good enough so well done.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown – May 22, 2020: The Anchor

IMG Credit: AEW

Smackdown
Date: May 22, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re on the road to Backlash and that means the Intercontinental Title tournament is still ongoing. We have two more first round matches tonight and that means we could be in for some interesting showdowns. Other than that, we need to build towards the pay per view and see what we have coming up. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with the Memorial Day video, which is starting early this year.

Opening sequence.

We open with the Dirt Sheet, where John Morrison’s abs are now certified social media influencers. Miz can’t believe that Otis is Mr. Money in the Bank and goes on a rant about how Braun Strowman teamed together. Miz: “It just makes no sense.” Morrison: “Like Becky Lynch choosing to have a child with Seth Rollins.” Morrison can’t believe that the Universal Champion is the one that Bray Wyatt replaced with puppet animals. Miz: “Bray Wyatt had the choice between Braun Strowman and stuffed animals. HE PICKED STUFFED ANIMALS!”

We have a special feature tonight: rejected Firefly Fun House puppets, all of whom don’t think much of Strowman. One of which is Mandyquin Rose, whose power is to whisper plans into Otis’ ears. Mandyquin: “Not everything about Braun is a monster.” Morrison: “TOO FAR!”

Cue Strowman to say the show isn’t half bad. Now ask him about Bray’s puppets at Money in the Bank. Miz can’t believe that Strowman thinks Bray is done with him. Miz fought Bray Wyatt and it spiraled into the lowest point of his life (and it only took him about a week to bounce back) but Morrison was there to help him. Morrison doesn’t think much of Strowman and manages to get him a match against Miz next.

Miz vs. Braun Strowman

Non-title. Miz slugs away to start and is knocked down with a single forearm to the chest. The running shoulder puts Miz down again and the dominance is on. A low bridge puts Strowman on the floor and Morrison adds a Flying Chuck. Strowman posts himself by mistake and Miz kicks him in the head. The short DDT is blocked though and Miz is driven into the corner. There’s the big toss and the running powerslam finishes Miz at 3:45.

Rating: C-. Miz got some stuff in here but he and Morrison, even combined, shouldn’t be any real threat to Strowman at this point. It’s not a very good match but that wasn’t the point of something like this. Odds are we get Morrison vs. Strowman next week and that’s the end of it as Bray comes back for the PPV title match.

Post match, Morrison challenges Strowman to a handicap match for the title at Backlash. Strowman says it’s on.

Intercontinental Title Tournament First Round: AJ Styles vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Styles has officially been traded to Smackdown for wrestlers to be named later. AJ’s headlock is reversed into the same thing from Nakamura, followed by a shot to Styles’ throat. That just earns Nakamura the dropkick, setting up the forearm off. Nakamura kicks him down and we take a break.

Back with AJ hitting the Pele to give us a double knockdown, with AJ up first for the fireman’s carry backbreaker. The Calf Crusher sends Nakamura to the ropes so he can snap off a Landslide for two. The sliding knee gives Nakamura two and he grabs a triangle choke. That’s broken up in an awesome counter into a one armed Styles Clash for two. AJ is sent to the apron and cuts Nakamura off with a kick to the head, setting up the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin at 13:17.

Rating: B-. These two always work well together, though AJ’s sudden face turn was a little jarring. I can go with that though as the trading wrestlers is something that would be fine for a logical storyline explanation of various moves. It’s certainly better than the Brand To Brand thing and a four guest star punch card.

We recap Charlotte stirring the pot between Bayley and Sasha Banks last week.

Bayley doesn’t want Sasha in her corner tonight so she can prove what she can do on her own. Banks doesn’t seem thrilled.

Charlotte vs. Bayley

Non-title and the announcers talk about this like it belongs at Wrestlemania. They also make it clear that this is another part of the Brand To Brand Invitational for Charlotte so that’s two in a row. Bayley tries an early rollup with feet on the ropes but the referee isn’t having it. Charlotte tries the same but only gets one without getting caught. After dropping Charlotte onto the apron, Bayley misses a baseball slide so Charlotte can drop her with a clothesline. Charlotte tosses her over the barricade and calls Sasha out here so she can beat both of them up at once.

Back from a break with Bayley fighting out of a chinlock but being knocked down in a hurry. Charlotte misses the moonsault though and seems to tweak her knee so they go outside. Bayley rams her into the apron and barricade to put her in real trouble, meaning it’s time to hammer away back inside. The chinlock goes on as we hear about Charlotte defending the title against Io Shirai and Rhea Ripley at Takeover. This is noteworthy as it was first reported by TV Guide, who always has someone on the NXT beat.

Charlotte fights up with a fall away slam and sends Bayley face first into the middle buckle. The moonsault misses again (the knee seems fine) so Charlotte hits the big boot for two instead. Bayley kicks her into the corner but the top rope elbow hits knees. That doesn’t hurt Charlotte’s knee either so it’s off to a Liontamer.

That’s reversed into a rollup for two and Bayley sends her head first into the middle buckle for a receipt. The kickout makes Bayley shout at commentary before chopping away at a kneeling Charlotte. Bayley’s Figure Four attempt is blocked with a right hand and Charlotte chops her down in the corner. They fight over a rollup and Bayley grabs the ropes and trunks for the pin at 14:58.

Rating: C+. This worked well enough but it wasn’t exactly the epic that they were going for. Part of that comes from the fact that Bayley does not feel like she’s on Charlotte’s level, despite having practically held the title for a year straight. She’s a distant third to Charlotte and Becky Lynch and a single win over Charlotte, after commentary reminded you how great Charlotte was every chance they could, isn’t some game changer.

Post break Bayley and Sasha are all good.

Otis/Mandy Rose vs. Sonya Deville/Dolph Ziggler

Otis slams Ziggler down to start so it’s quickly off to the women. Sonya sends Mandy into the corner and shouts a lot as Ziggler whips Otis into the steps. Back from a break with Sonya chinlocking and then kicking Mandy as Otis is up on the apron to shout a lot. Mandy fights up and makes the hot tag to Otis to clean house, including the running splash in the corner. The Caterpillar is loaded up but Ziggler gets over for the tag to Sonya. Mandy’s running knee sends Sonya into the corner and a running dropkick gets two. Sonya knees her in the face though and a running knee finishes Mandy at 9:35.

Rating: D+. Mandy really isn’t very good in the ring and it doesn’t help that Sonya is outclassing her every step of the way. Sonya has been bringing it on the microphone and completely outshined her in the ring here. Sonya just feels way more complete and polished at this point and it is becoming more and more clear every week.

Post match Ziggler hits a superkick to Otis for a bonus.

Jeff Hardy is ready for one more run and it starts with the Intercontinental Title. What better way to kick things off than by beating up a bully like Sheamus?

In Memory of Shad Gaspard. Just a graphic, an hour and a half into the show.

The Forgotten Sons say their blood is on the fans’ hands. Therefore, the fans’ blood should be on their hands.

Long recap of Miz/Morrison vs. Strowman. It was barely an hour ago and we need a long recap? The match is officially set.

Miz isn’t thrilled with Morrison making the challenge but Morrison talks about Strowman’s record in handicap matches. They even quote Sun Tzu about how to get ready, sending them into a Renee Young assisted HEY HEY HO HO dance.

We recap Sheamus vs. Jeff Hardy.

Intercontinental Title Tournament First Round: Jeff Hardy vs. Sheamus

Sheamus powers him into the corner to start so Hardy grabs a headlock to take things to the mat. Back up and Jeff hits a running forearm, only to get blasted with a running elbow to the face. The ten forearms to the chest are blocked and Jeff hits a dropkick through the ropes. The dive off the apron is blocked though and Sheamus drives him into the post. That’s not all though as Hardy gets bounced hard onto the announcers’ table. Sheamus shouts at Cole for spending four weeks putting Hardy over as we take a break.

Back with Sheamus dropping a knee and leaving it on Hardy’s face for a bonus. A hard clothesline lets Sheamus talk trash, only to have Jeff fight back with a dropkick. Whisper in the Wind drops Sheamus but Hardy’s delayed cover only gets one. Sheamus grabs the Irish Curse and hits it two more times for a bonus.

Hardy is so out of it that Sheamus can even dance a bit (Graves: “I GOT YOU SHAME-O!”) but Sheamus misses a charge into the post. The basement dropkick gives Hardy two and they head outside, with Hardy hitting the clothesline off the barricade. Back in and the Swanton hits knees to give Sheamus two more. The Brogue Kick misses and Hardy grabs a rollup for the pin at 14:09.

Rating: B. I don’t have anything major to complain about here as they told a good story of Hardy being physically outmatched but surviving long enough to win in the end. It’s a well told story both in the short and long term while also giving us a good match here. Sheamus doesn’t lose much by getting pinned by a legend and can complain about something that cost him the win. I liked this a good bit and it was well put together and executed.

Here are the updated brackets, with the semifinals next week:

Daniel Bryan

Jeff Hardy

AJ Styles

Elias

Overall Rating: B-. This was one of the better shows in a long time and the tournament has a lot to do with that. By having something to build the show around, it keeps things from going too nuts and you can see where a lot of the things are going. It’s not perfect as the Charlotte overkill is on full blast and Strowman vs. Miz/Morrison at the pay per view sounds horrible. I liked the show a lot more than I didn’t though and it was one of the better pandemic episodes.

Results

Braun Strowman b. The Miz – Running powerslam

AJ Styles b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Phenomenal Forearm

Bayley b. Charlotte – Rollup while grabbing the ropes

Sonya Deville/Dolph Ziggler b. Mandy Rose/Otis – Running knee to Rose

Jeff Hardy b. Sheamus – Rollup

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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New Column: Jinder Mahal And The Austin Theory Theory

A tale of two ideas and one of them is good.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-jinder-mahal-austin-theory-theory/

Monday Night Raw – December 19, 2005 (2020 Redo): These Still Work

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 19, 2005
Location: Bagram Air Force Base, Bagram, Afghanistan
Attendance: 5,000
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Joey Styles

We pause to go overseas for Tribute to the Troops, which felt a lot more special when they actually went to the troops. None of the storyline stuff here is going to matter whatsoever and that’s not the point of the show. This is going to be a bunch of fast paced stuff and thanking the troops. There’s nothing wrong with that so the quality of the wrestling isn’t what matters this week. Let’s get to it.

The troops rush into the makeshift arena.

We get a video on the history of entertaining the troops and how special this show is.

Here’s Vince McMahon to open things up (Lawler: “He’s like our five star general.”) and he’s got a big promise: Santa Claus himself is making a special trip here, but he’s not sure what to get everyone for Christmas. Santa doesn’t know what to tell the negative media types back home who have forgotten about the soldiers here. That story is one with a happy ending because the armed forces get the job done. He has an idea of what they should do though and brings out military brat Lilian Garcia to sing the National Anthem (and certainly admires the barely existing outfit).

WWE had to stop at a base in Germany on the way here and met some troops at a medical hospital.

Carlito vs. Big Show

Carlito hides to start but manages to snap Show’s throat across the top rope. Some left hands don’t do much and it’s the chokeslam to finish Carlito in just over a minute.

Post match Show celebrates with the troops. Just assume that takes place after every match.

We look at the troops having to be worried about mines, some of which had to be destroyed with C4 (Spanish Fly, same thing).

Jonathan Coachman is in the ring and introduces Santa Claus, who isn’t fat and is in military gear instead of the red suit. He also seems to be John Bradshaw Layfield, who talks about knowing Vince since he was a little evil boy. Vince is wrong about the world forgetting about their troops, because the reality is no one cares. If this place was any better, it would suck. There was NO Dom Perignon for his reindeer and it might as well be called Rehabistan.

As a result, Santa is skipping Afghanistan next year and is canceling Cinco de Mayo, Oktoberfest, Arbor, St. Patrick’s Day, Bastille Day and everything else. Oh and no leave for the troops! He’s going back home to cold beer….but we’ve got another Santa, who is rather large and in the red and white. This one says he’ll be delivering presents RIGHT HERE in Afghanistan but the other one says the only ho-ho-hos around here are the Divas. The red Santa wants a No Ho-Ho-Holds Barred match to settle this once and for all.

Good Santa vs. Bad Santa

Bad Santa hammers away to start so Good Santa hits him with the sack of toys. The pillow comes out of Good Santa’s shirt (that’s a relief as even Mick isn’t that big) but since it’s a pillow, it doesn’t do much damage. A big boot drops Good Santa instead but the Clothesline From Bad Santa misses and it’s the double arm DDT. The Mandible Claw is good for the fast pin.

John Cena and Trish Stratus had a quick press conference and met some troops.

MSNBC was here too and interviewed some troops. They’re still looking for Osama Bin Laden.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Snitsky

Snitsky shoves him in the face to start and knocks him down without much effort. The turnbuckle pad is ripped off but Shelton slugs away and hits a running forearm. The top rope clothesline connects but the Stinger Splash hits the buckle. A big boot gives Snitsky the pin. Shelton can’t even win HERE?

We look at a hut that has been turned into a makeshift coffee bar.

John Cena vs. Chris Masters

Non-title. Cena grabs a headlock to start as the announcers talk about the great strides democracy has been making in Afghanistan. Masters runs him over with a shoulder but Cena is right back with a front facelock. Back up and Masters pounds him down with a front facelock of his own. The Masterlock doesn’t quite work and Masters’ middle rope fist drop misses. Cena initiates the finishing sequence and it’s the Shuffle into the AA for the pin.

Rating: C. Yeah this was fine as Cena gets to beat up a muscleheaded heel. It’s not like Masters loses anything by getting beaten by the champ here as the show exists in its own continuity. That and it’s not like anyone believed he had a real chance to win the title in the Chamber anyway. I’m not entirely sure why it was non-title but it doesn’t really matter.

More clips of wrestlers meeting the troops.

Coach brings out Ric Flair, who is rather well received. Coach calls this Flair’s farewell tour because HHH beat him down at Survivor Series. Even Coach could beat him right now so let’s do it for the Intercontinental Title.

Intercontinental Title: Jonathan Coachman vs. Ric Flair

Flair is defending and takes Coach into the corner without much effort to start. A back elbow staggers Flair and Coach gets to take off the shirt (King: “Oh no, he’s exposing his body!”). Flair comes back with the chops and a low blow, followed by the Figure Four to retain in a hurry.

More clips of the troops, including an explanation from future United States Senator Martha McSally, and the wrestlers talking about how awesome this is.

Candice Michelle to keep Maria from going into an area that hasn’t been cleared for mines.

Candice Michelle/Maria vs. Trish Stratus/Ashley Massaro

The women are attired as you would expect them to be. Ashley and Maria start things off with Maria celebrating an early takedown. Candice comes in and wants Trish but it’s already time for the stalling on the floor. Actually make that body surfing and then the Go Daddy dance. Trish shoves her to the floor and lays on the ropes before accidentally headscissoring the referee. Maria is too busy posing on the apron to take the tag so Trish headscissors Candice this time. Ashley comes back in for a double elbow but Candice rolls her up and grabs….whatever you call what Ashley is wearing for the pin.

Rating: D+. There might have been something other than the wrestling here and that’s fine given the situation. The women were there for one purpose here and it worked well enough. The soldiers liked it and that’s all they were going for here. Again though, kind of weird to have the heels win but it doesn’t exactly matter.

205 Live – May 19, 2020: What Is With This Show

IMG Credit: WWE

205 Live
Date: May 15, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

After those weeks of not having this as the least interesting show WWE offers, it’s back to the same formula that turned the show into a joke. This week is back to the two matches with little story to them and telling us to watch NXT if we want the cruiserweight matches that actually matter. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Tyler Breeze vs. Tehuti Miles

Miles looks impressed with his own looks and throws a towel at Breeze to start. A spinebuster cuts Miles down so he heads to the ropes, where the referee has to pull him off. That lets Miles get in a shot to the face and he poses a bit while Breeze staggers around on the floor. Back in and the slow stomping ensues, followed by the chinlock. Breeze fights up and hits a quick Supermodel Kick for two but Miles hits a spinning Dominator for the same. Miles loads up a neckbreaker but Breeze reverses into the Unprettier for the pin at 6:00.

Rating: D+. Miles comes off as a cross between Breeze and Velveteen Dream, which isn’t quite the most interesting thing in the world. The bigger problem here is getting back to how 205 Live matches tend to feel: no emotion, no energy and nothing worth watching. You had two guys doing moves to each other and that isn’t the best way to fill in a few minutes when the moves aren’t all that great in the first place.

We look at the ten man tag from two months ago, with Jack Gallagher causing Tony Nese to be interrupted. Nese attacked him a few weeks ago and then jumped Isaiah Scott in the Cruiserweight Title tournament, allowing Gallagher to win. How that makes them hate each other is beyond me but it’s better than nothing. I think.

Tony Nese vs. Jack Gallagher

Feeling out process to start with Gallagher working on the arm but getting taken down into a leglock. Gallagher gets up and kicks him outside but Nese comes right back in to knock him down. The chinlock goes on, followed by a headlock to keep Gallagher in trouble. Nese switches to the bodyscissors and then a Boston crab, with Gallagher fighting up without much damage done.

They head outside with Gallagher sending him into the barricade for two back inside. The slugout it on until Nese snaps him throat first across the top. A Lionsault gets two and the Sunset Driver connects for the same. The Running Nese is countered with a headbutt and Gallagher’s sunset flip gets two. Nese can’t hit a pumphandle slam so Gallagher nails the rolling elbow for the pin at 8:38.

Rating: C+. Much better match than the first though you can feel how low level the whole thing is. This feels like the kind of a match that we have seen in some form several times now, which is the problem with so much around here. These matches run together and while this one was pretty good, it wasn’t the kind of match that I’m going to remember in about five minutes.

Post match Gallagher says this isn’t over.

Overall Rating: C-. I know I’ve harped on this but you can really feel how little this show matters. During the middle of the show, they were talking about how the tournament stuff is on the other show while pointing out that the main event was a match between people already eliminated. They go out of their way to make it clear that this show is the bottom of the barrel and I just don’t get it. If WWE cares so little about the show, why bother running the thing? This one was fine, though don’t expect to see WWE act like it matters.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Monday Night Raw – May 18, 2020: Tighten Up

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 18, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Samoa Joe, Byron Saxton

We’re on the road to Backlash and that means we need to get ready for a midlevel pay per view. I’m not sure what to expect from the show but there is a good chance that something will be added this time around. If nothing else, we have King Corbin as a guest star and an ax throwing contest. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a Becky Lynch highlight reel. I know the timing of this might not be the best, but this feels like an In Memorium segment.

Opening sequence.

Charly Caruso is in the ring to start and brings up the idea of Randy Orton vs. Edge being the best wrestling match of all time, should it take place. Cue Orton to say that challenging Edge to a wrestling match isn’t a surprise because the second W stands for wrestling. They’ve already torn the building apart in a Last Man Standing match and on that night, Edge was the better man.

No one can do what he does in the ring in a wrestling match though, including Edge. Last week Orton saw doubt in Edge’s eyes and the grit (take a shot) and passion are gone. Cue Edge (in a GET GRIT) to say Orton is playing a game of chess so he wasn’t going to rush in. This is just about getting a paycheck for Orton because he was handed this spot.

Orton didn’t grow up dreaming of being WWE Champion or saving up money to go to the show at the end of the month like Edge did. He didn’t cry when he won the Intercontinental Title because it was a stepping stone to the top. Edge remembers beating Orton for that title in 2004 but Orton tells him to hold on. Edge isn’t stopping because Orton doesn’t love this like everyone else does and yes he accepts the challenge. That’s enough for Orton, who leaves without saying a word. I’m digging the love of the business vs. love of a check vibe here, though the “best match ever” thing isn’t working.

We look back at Seth Rollins injuring Rey Mysterio’s eye and getting in a fight with Aleister Black as a result.

Rollins, in a suit, has a revelation for Murphy.

Here are Rollins and Murphy to explain what that revelation is. Rollins talks about falling into a dark place after losing to Drew McIntyre at Money in the Bank, but without darkness, there can be no light. However, he has been pulled out of the darkness by Rey Mysterio. What happened last week has been described as an act of hatred and an act of penance.

Rollins saw it as a moment of clarity that can make him the leader Raw needs. Rey is sitting at home with his family and soon, he will come to know that what happened to him was a blessing in disguise. Soon Rey will say thank you. Cue Humberto Carrillo to say Rey is an idol to millions and Rollins is just a coward. Carrillo gets in the ring but Murphy gets between them.

Murphy vs. Humberto Carrillo

Joined in progress, despite Murphy already having a match with Aleister Black scheduled for later. Humberto gets in a kick to the head from the apron but Murphy sends him head first into the mat. Back up and Humberto hits an enziguri, followed by a springboard kick to the face to put Murphy on the floor. That means the big twisting flip dive but Carrillo glares at Rollins, allowing Murphy to knee him out of the air. Murphy’s Law finishes Carrillo at 2:50.

Post match Murphy stays on Carrillo but here’s Black to start in a hurry. Or not actually as Black tries Black Mass, sending Murphy bailing up the ramp.

King Corbin complains about not having his own private locker room. There were fingerprint smudges on his crown and he has to go from building to building to get food. What is going on here at Raw? Now, he and the referee need to talk about how tonight’s match is going to go.

An emotional Liv Morgan talks about her mom not having much in her bank account but having a lot of determination. She is her mother’s daughter and a couple of weeks ago, she had a match with twelve time champion Charlotte. No she didn’t win, but she did learn. One day, she will be Raw Women’s Champion.

Here’s Charlotte for a chat because she needs to be on every show. Charlotte talks about everything she’s been doing lately, including a champion vs. champion match this week on Smackdown against Bayley and her sidekick Sasha Banks. As for tonight though, she invites Ruby Riott out here for a challenge.

Charlotte vs. Ruby Riott

Non-title and joined in progress again with the fight heading to the floor where Riott can dodges a chop, which hits the post by mistake. Riott goes after the arm but gets sent into the post, allowing Charlotte asks if Liv is watching this. Back up and Riott manages to send Charlotte face first into the middle buckle for two. Riott hits a Downward Spiral, though Charlotte takes it almost like a DDT. A double wristlock is broken up so Ruby tires the Riott Kick, which is blocked with ease. The Figure Eight makes Riott tap at 3:40.

Rating: C. Hey Charlotte wins again while Riott loses again. It’s almost like you could have just gone with that result as soon as Riott’s music came on. The match was the usual way to let WWE praise Charlotte every chance they can, because the solution to everything is more Charlotte (and more Corbin of course).

Bobby Lashley is ready for R-Truth but MVP comes in to bring up the fact that Lashley hasn’t had a WWE Championship match in thirteen years. Lashley already has enough trophies, like that trophy wife. That earns MVP a glare, but all he wants is to unleash Lashley.

We look back at last week’s basketball game. Tonight: axe throwing.

The Street Profits are ready for the competition and run into a bunch of people in viking gear. The Viking Raiders blow a horn and say they have a gift for them: SMOKE, as produced by a fire. Dawkins says they don’t mean it literally, but Ford says you accepts a gift from a bunch of vikings with axes. Good advice really. Ivar throws a perfect axe and Ford is ready to go already. Dawkins says they’ve got this. More on this later.

Here’s Kairi Sane with a bunch of balloons around the ring to celebrate Asuka. Cue Asuka, who is very pleased by the whole thing. Sane presents her with some flowers and talks about all of Asuka’s accomplishments, making her a Grand Slam Champion. Sane busts out a flute and plays a little diddy, only to have Nia Jax interrupt.

There’s nothing to celebrate because Asuka was handed the title. Becky is on maternity leave so Asuka is just on a temp job. Nia will be champion soon because look at her. Then we can have a real party, so Asuka starts striking away. The running hip attack sends Jax outside. This would have been a little better had it not been the same as about 184 other Jax promos.

King Corbin says Drew McIntyre may be WWE Champion but he’s not a king you see. Drew beat Brock Lesnar for the WWE Championship but he still has the ability to slip up. We see Drew watching in the back as Corbin says the next time they face off, he’ll take Drew’s title in the main event of Wrestlemania.

Here’s R-Truth, whose cousin Pretty Ricky has talked about how bad Bobby Lashley has been lately. Now he doesn’t want to be put in Nelson from the Simpsons again but he’s going to have to face Lashley tonight. His childhood hero John Cena would never give up, just like Truth will never give up on getting his baby back. So Tom Brady, he’s coming for you, even if it means a sack! After commentary explains the joke (AGAIN), we’re ready to go.

R-Truth vs. Bobby Lashley

Truth accuses Lashley of trying to Debo him and bails outside, where Pretty Ricky appears. Lashley isn’t having that and sends him ribs first into the post. Back in and Lashley slaps him a few times, sending Truth into a frenzy. Unfortunately that frenzy lasts about three seconds as it’s a clothesline into the full nelson slam. The full nelson makes Truth tap at 2:25.

Post match MVP comes out to applaud.

Lana is watching in the back and screams again. She throws some stuff to add an extra dimension.

The Kabuki Warriors are rather happy in the back as Nia Jax watches on.

Women’s Tag Team Titles: Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross vs. IIconics

The IIconics are challenging and show us a clip of their win last week. They’re looking forward to getting their titles back so Bliss and Cross can just leave. Bliss has to fight out of the corner to start and the double knees Royce’s ribs get two. It’s off to Kay for a scoop brainbuster on Cross but she misses a big boot, allowing the (rather early) hot tag to Bliss. Insult To Injury gets two on everything breaks down in a hurry. Bliss blasts Kay with the right hand and Twisted Bliss gets two as Royce makes the save. Peyton sends Bliss into the post three times in a row, which is a DQ at 2:44.

Sane is playing the flute again but Jax sends her into a case.

Post break, Kay blames Royce for the loss and slaps her before they hug and cry.

We look at Chapter Two of Undertaker’s Last Ride.

We look back at Shayna Baszler beating Natalya last week. Tonight, they’re meeting again in a submission match.

Asuka is livid and wants revenge on Nia.

Post break, Asuka jumps Nia as they’re flying through this story tonight.

Natalya vs. Shayna Baszler

Submission match. Natalya goes right after her and tries an early Sharpshooter, which is reversed into an ankle lock. That’s broken up with a boot to the face so Baszler starts bending the arm. Natalya spins out so Baszler pulls her straight down by the hair. Shayna can’t get the Sharpshooter so Natalya puts her own. The rope is reached but THANKFULLY that’s not a break, meaning Shayna has to crawl out of the ring for the break. Back in and Natalya grabs a kneebar but Shayna reverses into a Koquina Clutch for the tap at 3:48.

Rating: C-. Some of the holds looked a bit nasty but it’s still Natalya. Why does WWE think fans are interested in her other than she’s been around for a long time? The match wasn’t terrible but I’m going to need a much bigger reason to care about Natalya than….well whatever reason WWE thinks we have of caring about her. A heel turn isn’t going to work either, as Natalya can’t do emotions no matter what.

Post match the production staff sets up the KO Show but Natalya wrecks everything in a fit.

We look at the issues between Zelina Vega and company.

Vega tells her team to be on the same page out there. Andrade seems to blame Austin Theory for everything and tensions remain high.

Here’s Kevin Owens for the first time since Wrestlemania for the Kevin Owens Show, though the set is still wrecked. Owens has been out since Wrestlemania due to an injury but now he’s back at full health. Therefore, let’s bring out his guests: Zelina Vega, Andrade, Angel Garza and Austin Theory.

Owens heads to the apron so Vega can talk about how there is no distention here and there won’t be a Jerry Springer Show. Vega brags about all four of them and isn’t happy that Owens is on the apron. Owens says he’s offering them some respect but it’s also because there is another guest: Apollo Crews, who runs in to jump Andrade. The big brawl is on and we take a break.

Angel Garza/Andrade vs. Kevin Owens/Apollo Crews

Not joined in progress for once with Garza TAKING OFF HIS PANTS early on. Due to the lighter weight, Crews suplex slams Garza down and hands it off to Owens to stomp away. A backsplash crushes him as Owens tells Andrade to get in. Andrade does just that and kicks Owens down but he’s right back with a clothesline.

It’s back to Crews to pick up the pace, including a hard spinebuster to Garza. Vega offers a distraction so Theory can accidentally hit Garza, allowing Crews to hit the toss powerbomb to finish Garza at 2:49. Owens is very proud of Crews. Not that Owens would want the US Title for himself or anything, because that’s not what we’re doing at the moment.

Post match the team is in disarray and Andrade jumps Theory from behind. The fight is on with Garza helping take Theory down as Vega yells at them to stop. Theory is sent into the barricade and Vega adds a slap, saying she should have never believed in him. Another whip sends Theory into some chairs as the team seems to be down one man.

Drew McIntyre says he’s ready for all of the challenges and Monday is always a good night for a Claymore Party. He knows Bar….hold on let him get this right….King Corbin is dangerous but Drew has a special Claymore for him.

Back to the woods, where the Vikings are really, really good at axe throwing (or maybe the production staff is really good at camera cuts). Ford asks for some space so he can get his Tiger Woods on. Ivar: “TIGER??? IS THERE A TIGER IN THE WOODS???” Can we PLEASE get some continuity on their level of pop culture knowledge? Anyway, Ford throws and the axe goes sailing over a tree.

Post break, Dawkins goes to throw and accidentally breaks the barrel of ale. Ford offers some of his cup but Dawkins says this is nothing like Thor.

Aleister Black vs. Murphy

Seth Rollins is here too. Black wastes no time in striking away at Murphy and taking it to the floor for a big kick to the chest. Another kick hits post though (like when Charlotte chopped the post earlier) and Murphy takes him inside as Rollins sees Theory still down at ringside. Black fights back and loads up Black Mass but Theory comes in for the DQ at 2:34 on Rollins’ orders.

Post match the beatdown is on with Theory hugging Rollins.

And now, in the fourth segment of the night, it’s time for the actual axe throwing competition. They both get ten throws and only bulls’ eyes count. The Vikings win 10-1 with Ford hitting the only target on the last throw. Then the cops come up to complain about an axe being thrown through their police car window. It must have been someone who couldn’t throw, so Dawkins takes the axe, throws it over his shoulder, and hits a bull’s eye. See, it’s like the opposite of last week, but with axes!

Apollo Crews says he’s been waiting a long time since Money in the Bank and now he had to do something. Now, he knows what he wants: the United States Title, which he wants a shot at next week. Zelina Vega comes in and promises pain next week if Crews goes through with this. Crews is ready for his title shot.

We’re STILL not done with the axe throwing thing, as the cops yell at all four of them for being dangerous. The female cop lets them go though because Ivar is cute. Erik, not so much.

Drew McIntyre vs. King Corbin

Non-title. Hold on though as here are Bobby Lashley and MVP, with the former saying he’s coming for McIntyre’s title no matter what. The two of them watch as McIntyre and Corbin fight over a lockup to start. A shot to the leg staggers McIntyre early on but he’s fine enough to clothesline Corbin outside. Another clothesline puts Corbin over the barricade with MVP clapping from the stage.

There’s a third clothesline to put Corbin at ringside and he goes inside, only to roll back to the floor to avoid a Claymore. Corbin knocks McIntyre off the apron and into the barricade, followed by the slide underneath the corner clothesline for two. McIntyre gets sent face first into the turnbuckle and it’s a superplex to give Corbin one. Corbin talks trash and runs into an overhead belly to belly.

There’s a big boot to set up the top rope shot to the head into McIntyre’s nip up. McIntyre gets two off a spinebuster but Corbin plants him down for one more. Back up and the Futureshock looks to set up the Claymore, which is countered into Deep Six for two. Corbin tries the slide under the ropes clothesline but walks into the Claymore for the pin at 9:12.

Rating: C. Now this is a better usage of Corbin (provided you keep him on one show): let him do one match as a threat to the champ and then send him elsewhere. There is no reason to do anything higher up with him than that and if WWE can grasp that concept, they might be able to get something out of Corbin. It was fine for a warmup for McIntyre vs. Lashley and that’s all it needed to be. Now keep Corbin on his own show if you have to have him in such a big role.

McIntyre calls out Lashley but MVP points at his watch to say on their time to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. I’m not sure how to feel on this one as they had some good and bad things going. I like the keeping things moving and making you want to know where things are going next. There is no reason to have some big fifteen minute match and then expect me to want to see more of it next week. Save that stuff for the pay per view and make it feel more important.

Then though you have points where they just kept going with stuff. Nia seems primed to be the next challenger for Asuka. Ok, that’s fine. Have her interrupt, then have her attack Sane, then have Asuka swear revenge for her fallen friend, who Nia could beat in a regular match if you have the chance. That’s probably a month and they did it in about ten minutes. It’s ok to not burn through EVERYTHING in one night while also keeping things moving. Find the middle ground.

That middle ground does not include FIVE SEGMENTS on an axe throwing contest in the middle of the woods, especially a week after a basketball game. The Vikings beat the Profits in a tag match two weeks ago on Raw. In theory that sets up a title match (because WWE loves that trope) but instead, it’s setting up a rehash of MVP/Matt Hardy when neither were healthy enough to wrestle. I know they’re stretched for ideas here, but can we please just get to a match instead of the guaranteed tiebreaker competition next week?

Overall, this show wasn’t the worst by any stretch and they are indeed doing something, but a lot of what they are doing is making my head hurt. Lashley is a great choice as the Monster Of The Month/Two for McIntyre and I like Theory joining up with Rollins, who is a much better fit for him than Vega and company. Just tighten things up a bit and this show could actually work rather than being dragged over the finish line for a change.

Results

Murphy b. Humberto Carrillo – Murphy’s Law

Charlotte b. Ruby Riott – Figure Eight

Bobby Lashley b. R-Truth – Full nelson

Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross b. IIconics via DQ when Royce sent Bliss into the post

Shayna Baszler b. Natalya – Koquina Clutch

Apollo Crews/Kevin Owens b. Angel Garza/Andrade – Toss powerbomb to Garza

Aleister Black b. Murphy when Austin Theory interfered

Drew McIntyre b. King Corbin – Claymore

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw – September 26, 1994: Still Waiting After 25 Years

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 26, 1994
Location: Memorial Auditorium, Utica, New York
Attendance: 4,500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage

It’s a new taping cycle to wrap up the month and, I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I’d love to see more Bob Backlund here. He was amazing last week with the complete insanity making the segment the best thing about the show. Odds are that won’t get a ton of focus, but we can only hope. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a quick preview of Razor Ramon vs. Tatanka for the Intercontinental Title.

Opening sequence.

Intercontinental Title: Razor Ramon vs. Tatanka

Tatanka is challenging and has Ted DiBiase in his corner. Razor gets the better of a chop off and there’s a clothesline to put Tatanka on the floor. Back in and Tatanka goes with some overhand chops to more success and a forearm to the back slows Razor down. A backdrop attempt is countered with a faceplant to the mat, meaning it’s Razor’s turn to work the arm.

We hit the armbar with the slaps to the back of the head so Tatanka hits a clothesline. The running elbow gets two on the champ and we take a break. Tatanka misses a charge though and crashes out to the floor. Razor knocks him off the apron to keep him out there but a missed right hand lets Tatanka get in a neck snap across the top. This time it’s Tatanka taking him to the floor and we take a break.

Back with more walking around on the floor and Razor being drive back first into the apron a few times. They head inside again with Tatanka chopping away and grabbing the abdominal stretch. DiBiase gets in on the grabbing thing by grabbing Tatanka’s hand, only to have Razor reverse into one of his own. With that going nowhere, Razor puts him on the top for the belly to back superplex, which draws DiBiase up for a distraction. Razor goes after him so Tatanka follows, drawing out Lex Luger. Bam Bam Bigelow follows and jumps him, only to have Tatanka join in and get counted out.

Rating: D. This was the big Tatanka heel debut: a slow, plodding match which went about five minutes longer than it needed to and saw Tatanka get counted out. What a great way to make me worried about the guy and get me fired up to see him face Luger. This was horrible and a terrible start for the heel run, which doesn’t exactly bode well.

Undertaker is ready for Yokozuna on the Hart Attack Tour.

Kwang vs. Rich Myers

Myers avoids a charge to start but Vince McMahon starts talking about a trade between ESPN, the Arizona Cardinals and the WWF, with Savage being the quarterback, the Bushwhackers going to ESPN and Phil Sims (NFL quarterback) coming to Raw for commentary. Thankfully this goes nowhere as Kwang hits a spinwheel kick for the fast win.

Here’s Jerry Lawler to bring out British Bulldog for the King’s Court. Lawler starts with the dog jokes (Lawler: “My dog’s name is Timex: he’s a watchdog.”) but finally makes a joke about Bulldog’s wife and that’s too far. Cue Jim Neidhart to say Bulldog isn’t part of the Hart Family so he shouldn’t have been at Summerslam. They can fight next week, and that’s fine with Bulldog. He was rather fired up here, and not exactly in a good way.

Next week: a woman’s tag match. That might actually be good given the time frame.

We look back at Bob Backlund going nuts last week. The WWF Magazine editor has a slightly separated shoulder.

1-2-3 Kid vs. Gary Davis

Kid grabs a quick snapmare and Davis swears a hair pull. A wristlock doesn’t work so well for Davis as Kid kicks him down without much trouble. Cue Backlund with a present for Savage, though Vince reads the letter. The present is a dictionary so Savage can know what Backlund is talking about. Kid misses a running dropkick in the corner but stops a charging Davis with a kick to the head. The top rope legdrop finishes Davis in a hurry.

Rating: D+. The match was just background noise for the sake of the Backlund delivery. That’s not the biggest story in the world but Backlund vs. Savage in a promo battle alone could be worth the time. I doubt we’re going there, but at least there is SOMETHING to look forward to around here.

King Kong Bundy is coming back. He’s really big you see.

Shawn Michaels/Diesel vs. Chris Kanyon/Bob Starr

Non-title. I can always go for a surprise cameo like this one. Shawn elbows Kanyon down to start and it’s off to Diesel to throw him into the corner. Starr comes in and takes the top rope elbow (Savage: “That elbow looks familiar.”) and there’s Diesel’s side slam. The Jackknife connects and Shawn comes in for the pin (because he gets the glory).

Rating: D+. You can only get so much out of a short squash like this but at least the champs are the kind of guys who can make almost anyone look good. The more interesting note here is Kanyon, which kind of tells you how little this match meant or had to offer in the first place. At least the champs got to look dominant, even in a short form squash.

Post match here are the Headshrinkers, though it’s the debuting Sionne (Barbarian) taking Samu’s place.

Post break, Lou Albano says that Samu is out due to some bad fish. I remember hearing this live and spending MONTHS waiting for Samu to come back. The brawl is on again to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. The high point of this show was Bob Backlund giving Randy Savage a dictionary. I can’t get out of 1994 fast enough as it’s such a terrible time for the company. Is it any wonder why WCW was on the rise at this point? Hulk Hogan vs. the Faces of Fear wasn’t good, but it’s better than Barbarian debuting as the new Headshrinker. Awful show here, as usual.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event – May 14, 2020: They Did Something Right

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: May 14, 2020
Location: WWE Performance Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: MVP, Tom Phillips

This is going to be a different kind of Main Event as there is no point in talking about Smackdown when Money in the Bank has since taken place. Therefore expect a lot from the red show, which tends to make for some less interesting than usual shows. However, given how lame the pre-Money in the Bank shows were, it sounds like a big improvement. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Jinder Mahal vs. Denzel DeJournette

Denzel wrestles him up against the ropes and then down to the mat so Mahal elbows his way to freedom. A good superkick gives Mahal one as commentary makes it very clear that Mahal is a former WWE Champion. The chinlock goes on, followed by some kicks to the head for a bonus. Mahal drops a knee for two but Denzel grabs a belly to back suplex for the double knockdown. There’s a flying shoulder to drop Mahal but he knees Denzel in the face. The Khallas finishes Denzel at 6:23.

Rating: D+. What else were you expecting here? Well maybe a former World Champion not needing six minutes against a jobber. I know we’re in for another Mahal push because of the international appeal but that doesn’t mean we have to like it. It’s the same Mahal as it was before, albeit with a repaired knee. Why would I want to see this all over again?

Video on the Money in the Bank ladder match.

From Raw.

Here’s an emotional Becky Lynch without the title but with the Money in the Bank briefcase. She’s upset about something and needs to go away for awhile. That’s why she made asked the powers that be around here to raise the stakes last night. Cue Asuka to scream about the briefcase, but Becky opens it up to reveal the title, which now belongs to Asuka because the ladder match was for the title, not an opportunity at the title. Asuka freaks out and celebrates around the arena. Becky: “You go be a warrior, because I’m gonna go be a mother.” Asuka stops and hugs Becky before chanting her name in a great moment.

Video on Drew McIntyre vs. Seth Rollins from the pay per view.

From Raw.

Drew McIntyre vs. Andrade

Non-title. McIntyre works on an armbar to start and shouts at Vega a bit. Back up and McIntyre hits a kick to the ribs out of the corner to send Andrade outside. Andrade charges into a tilt-a-whirl slam onto the apron as this is one sided so far. Andrade dives under the ring and reaches through the ropes that hold it together to pull McIntyre into the apron.

A baseball slide hits McIntyre in the ribs before Andrade starts in on the arm. Double knees to said arm get two but McIntyre is back with a sitout powerbomb for the same. McIntyre gets sent into the corner for the running knees but the hammerlock DDT is countered into a Glasgow Kiss. The reverse Alabama Slam sets up the Claymore for the pin at 8:34.

Rating: C+. They’re moving with the stories tonight as Vega’s team seems to be on the ropes after only being around for a few weeks. Andrade losing again doesn’t make him look good, but it’s not like his title reign has meant anything in four and a half months anyway. Granted he’s losing to the World Champion so it’s not like it’s some upset. Still though, either protect him or get rid of the title.

Post match Drew says he didn’t come out here for a match but anything can happen on Monday Night Raw. He’s always up for a Claymore party, but he’s here to talk about something else. Last night he was in a heck of a fight with Seth Rollins. He still has the title though and now he has some more exciting news. There is something called the Brand To Brand Invitation, meaning that a wrestler from Smackdown has challenged Drew to a match and it has been accepted. That’s why next week, live on Raw, it’s Drew vs. King Corbin.

Ruby Riott vs. Bianca Belair

Ruby gets in a cheap shot after teasing a test of strength early on. Belair’s headlock takeover puts Ruby down and a heck of a dropkick sends her into the corner. Another kick to the back sends Ruby face first into the mat so Ruby gets smart by grabbing the foot. This time it’s Ruby kicking her outside with Belair clutching the arm as we take a break.

Back with Ruby kicking her in the arm for two but getting speared down. That was with the bad arm though and Belair can’t follow up. This time Belair kicks her to the floor and stomps away, followed by a handspring moonsault for two. The standing version gets the same as they’re putting in more effort than you almost ever see around here. Ruby reverses into something like a Rings of Saturn but Belair powers out in a hurry. An STO gives Ruby two but she gets caught on top, meaning it’s the KOD to give Belair the pin at 10:02.

Rating: C+. This was a match that had no business being good but they made it work well here. Ruby continues to be someone who can make anyone look better and Belair is an athletic marvel, making this a nice combination. I liked it well enough and after Becky’s announcement, the division is going to need some fresh names. These two could do that rather well.

Video on Edge and Randy Orton’s Last Man Standing match.

From Raw.

Here’s Edge for the big closing segment. He knows his career didn’t end at Wrestlemania but why is he confronting Randy Orton? Edge got his pound of flesh at Wrestlemania….and here’s Orton. Randy says congratulations because the better man won. Orton goes to leave but turns around and comes back because he can’t be the bigger man. The better man won at Wrestlemania but the better wrestler didn’t.

Edge hid behind other wrestlers at the Royal Rumble and then incapacitated Orton at Wrestlemania. He might not have gotten up at ten but it didn’t take him nine years to make it back. Orton talks about how Edge hasn’t had a regular match since 2011 and his grit and passion won’t help him there. If Edge has the guts, they’ll have a straight up wrestling match at Backlash. Edge doesn’t say anything but Charly Caruso says if it happens, it might be the greatest wrestling match ever. Try to get your head around that one to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. That’s one of the better Main Events in a long time and the women’s match was a big help. Granted it helps that we’re past Money in the Bank now and don’t have to worry about building momentum towards the match any longer. It’s not a great show, but for Main Event, this was a near masterpiece.

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Armageddon 2005 (2020 Redo): The Big Fight Fight

IMG Credit: WWE

Armageddon 2005
Date: December 18, 2005
Location: Dunkin Donuts Center, Providence, Rhode Island
Attendance: 8,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re almost done with the year and we’ll wrap it up inside the Cell with Undertaker vs. Randy Orton in the final blowoff. Other than that, it’s the Raw Tag Team Champions vs. the Smackdown Tag Team Champions as Big Show/Kane face Rey Mysterio and Batista. I think you can tell they’re wrapping the year up with that second big match. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is all about Undertaker vs. Orton. Fair enough in this case.

John Bradshaw Layfield vs. Matt Hardy

JBL’s leg is fine after being on crutches Friday. Before Matt comes out, JBL talks about how the smallest state has the biggest star tonight. Matt always talks about how he will not die, even though he lost his girlfriend and got fired. The shirt should say “I wish I was dead.” Matt’s intro cuts JBL off and the fight is on in a hurry. JBL slugs away and sends him into the ropes, with Matt’s head getting tied between them. Ever the villain, JBL kicks the tied head and then pulls on Matt’s legs.

The referee finally gets Matt loose so JBL drops a bunch of elbows. There’s another kick to the head but Matt fights up and hits a DDT for two. A big running shoulder takes Matt down again and JBL pokes him in the eye for good measure. Matt gets in a shot of his own and hits a top rope moonsault for two. JBL gets a turnbuckle pad off though and Matt gets whipped into the steel, setting up the Clothesline From JBL for the pin.

Rating: D+. This felt like it was added to fill in some time on the show as an interrupted interview isn’t exactly a hot angle to set up a pay per view match. On the one hand it makes sense to boost JBL up so he can be fed to someone else later, but my goodness it’s hard to watch Matt bounce down the ranks like he’s been doing.

We recap Melina failing to get Batista to back out of the Tag Team Title match on Friday. Batista and Rey Mysterio would go on to win the titles.

The Mexicools offer to cancel the match tonight in exchange for some, ahem, favors for Melina. She isn’t interested.

We look at Undertaker massacring Mankind inside the Cell. That one still has so much impact as Foley probably shouldn’t have survived.

MNM vs. Mexicools

Psicosis/Super Crazy for the Mexicools in a match that was supposed to be for the titles until Batista and Rey happened. Mercury works on Psicosis’ arm to start and it’s already off to Nitro, who is armdragged straight down. Psicosis misses his running dropkick in the corner as Cole makes various Melina jokes. MNM gets knocked outside for a dive from Psicosis, followed by Crazy diving over the referee in a cool spot.

Back in and Mercury stomps on Psicosis, followed by Nitro breaking up a sunset flip with a stomp to the face. Nitro’s breakdancing legdrop sets up a front facelock, followed by some straight right hands to the face. Psicosis gets in an enziguri though and the hot tag brings in Crazy to clean house. A tornado DDT gets two on Mercury and, after Melina is shoved off the apron, the moonsault hits Mercury for two with Nitro making the save. Back up and the Snapshot is good for the fast pin on Crazy.

Rating: C+. The Mexicools are a good lucha team and could have some nice high flying matches like this one. It’s a good idea to have MNM beat a high energy team like that before they get their rematch for the titles. If nothing else, it’s nice to act like there is an actual division rather than two teams fighting over the titles for a change.

Sharmell doesn’t like Booker being asked a question and says tonight, Booker is sweeping Chris Benoit. Interviewer Krystal can ride the broom home if she can’t find a car.

We recap the best of seven series, with Booker cheating to go up 3-0.

Booker T. vs. Chris Benoit

Booker is up 3-0 so it’s a title match for him. The early lockup doesn’t go anywhere but Booker stalls on the floor anyway. Back in and Booker drives him into the corner for a clean break so Benoit chops him to the floor. Back in again and Benoit takes him to the mat without much trouble but Booker actually grabs a hammerlock to take over. A quick Crossface attempt sends Booker outside again for another breather.

Booker gets back in so Benoit starts in on the leg but Booker is up again in a hurry. A back elbow to the face drops Benoit again and a hard suplex gives Booker two. Benoit is right back up with a snap German suplex for two, only to have Booker knee him to the floor. They chop it out until Benoit gets posted to cut him off again. The abdominal stretch goes on back inside but Benoit hiptosses his way to freedom.

A double clothesline gives us a double knockdown but it’s Benoit up first with the rolling German suplexes, plus Three Amigos for a bonus. Sharmell uses the broom to break up the Swan Dive though and Booker hits the missile dropkick for two. Sharmell offers another distraction and gets in a low blow so Booker’s ax kick can connect for two more.

The Crossface sends Booker to the ropes so Benoit rolls more German suplexes. Now it’s the Swan Dive for two but the referee gets bumped. Benoit gets the Sharpshooter to make Booker tap. That’s released so Benoit can check the referee, meaning Booker can try the Book End, which is reversed into a DDT. Now the Crossface can make Booker tap to make it 3-1.

Rating: B. These two can do this without missing a beat every single time and that was the case again here. Benoit had to fight to survive here and that will likely be the case again going forward. That being said, it’s getting a little more difficult to care about seeing a fourth match and the next three (more than likely) are going to have even less interest. Then again, the quality is still good so what do I know?

Undertaker chokeslammed Rikishi off the Cell. They do know we saw these clips on Smackdown right?

Here are Teddy Long and Palmer Cannon to thank the fans for a great 2005. They have a treat for the fans: Santa Claus and his elf, who may very well be Vito and Nunzio. They aren’t your traditional Santa and elf though as they’re tired of giving and want their own presents. Maybe a Tag Team Title shot, or a Cruiserweight Title shot! Cannon has a gift for them, so here’s the Boogeyman to sing a Christmas carol about how he’s coming to get you. Pain ensues and worms are consumed in a hurry as Vito has some issues controlling his inner functions, meaning the suit is probably ruined.

Video on Undertaker vs. Randy Orton to set up the Cell match. It feels like they’re filling in a lot of time here, though this might be to clear the ring.

Bobby Lashley vs. William Regal/Paul Burchill

Burchill starts for the team and actually takes Lashley down for some knees and elbows to the back. Regal comes in for more of the same, followed by Burchill’s knee to the back for two. Lashley drives Regal into the corner without much trouble and then snaps off a suplex to send Regal into the corner. The powerslam plants Regal though and a Dominator finishes Burchill without much trouble.

Rating: D+. Another match that could have been on Smackdown, but do we really need Lashley in a handicap match beating two low level guys? We’ve seen something like this for months now and Lashley was already in the main event of a major pay per view. It’s kind of a step backwards, but if this is the only rehab he needs, he should be fine.

And now, we go to the Friendly Tap, owned by former WWE referee Tim White. He doesn’t seem happy here and keeps drinking, even as we see him refereeing HHH vs. Chris Jericho inside the Cell in 2002. White injured his shoulder in the match and he says it ruined his life. He took it out on his wife and his family doesn’t talk to him anymore. White doesn’t have anything to live for anymore, so Josh Matthews wishes him a White Christmas. Josh: “Get it? Because your name is White!” In response, White whips out a shotgun, steps off camera, and fires.

This would lead to one of the most tasteless and, given what would happen in the company about a year and a half later, horrible series of segments ever with Lunchtime Suicides, where White would attempt to kill himself in a variety of ways for the next several weeks. That would be one of those things that WWE would bury in their archives while fans tried to figure out what the heck they were thinking with the videos.

So a former WWE name just shot himself on live pay per view. Less than fifteen seconds later, it’s time for our next match. Can’t grieve forever I guess.

Cruiserweight Title: Kid Kash vs. Juventud Guerrera

Kash is challenging and they hammer away at each other to start. A running dropkick stops Kash and a headscissors takes him down again. Juvy gets two off a standing hurricanrana and the Fujiwara armbar goes on. A backdrop puts Kash on the floor for a slingshot dive but Kash takes over on the arm. Back in and the armbar has Juvy in trouble so Kash sends him shoulder first into the buckle.

There’s a hammerlock slam for two as Cole talks to Tazz about Hooked on Phonics, because we’re supposed to ignore Tim White shooting himself five minutes ago. Kash’s double jump moonsault hits knees and Juvy kicks him in the face. They both wind up on top with Juvy snapping off a super hurricanrana for a delayed two. The Juvy Driver sets up….actually a flipping legdrop instead of the 450 but it doesn’t connect anyway. Kash hits the Dead Level brainbuster for the pin and the title.

Rating: C. This was another match that could have been on any given Smackdown (a trend tonight), though it still comes after a suicide on live television. I know it wound up being a joke but the shock value alone should be enough to pause for a second instead of going straight into another match. That’s not something that you can just drop and it isn’t working here whatsoever. It doesn’t help when you go to the Cruiserweight Title match, which is hardly top level interesting stuff in the first place.

We recap the Raw vs. Smackdown tag team match. It’s fallout from Survivor Series and the Smackdown Special, with Kane and Big Show attacking Rey Mysterio, drawing in Batista to help him out. They’re both Tag Team Champions as well.

Batista/Rey Mysterio vs. Big Show/Kane

Non-title and Batista starts with Big Show. Batista gets launched into the corner early on and then Show does it again for a bonus. A waistlock doesn’t work either for Batista so he slugs away and gets a boot up in the corner. The chokeslam attempt is broken up and Show kicks him in the face. Kane comes in and gets suplexed in a hurry, only to come back with the side slam. The top rope clothesline misses though and it’s off to Rey for some sticking and moving.

That just earns him a stare from Kane so Rey hammers away in the corner. Rey kicks him into the 619 position as everything breaks down. Rey gets taken to the floor with Show posting him and then tossing Rey over the top in a heap. Back in and Rey can’t get anywhere with right hands to Kane so he goes with the sitout bulldog instead. The hot tag brings in Batista for a spear and spinebuster to Kane. Batista and Show fight to the floor, leaving Kane to pop up for a chokeslam and the fast pin.

Rating: D+. What in the world was that? This was the second biggest show on the card and it felt like a house show main event where they wanted to get out of town and hit the road as fast as possible. There was nothing to this one and it’s pretty annoying that they changed the Tag Team Titles for the sake of this. I know it doesn’t matter in the short or long term, but this could have been a lot more, even though it was hardly important in the first place.

One more Undertaker Cell clip: destroying Shawn Michaels in 1997.

The Cell is lowered.

Undertaker vs. Randy Orton

Inside the Cell in case you don’t have the best attention span and Bob Orton is here with Randy. Orton runs away to start and tries a headlock, which earns him a hard knockdown. Back in and Undertaker’s own headlock doesn’t last long as Orton escapes and gets two off a dropkick. Some right hands in the corner just annoy Undertaker, who launches Orton into the corner and hammers away. They head outside with Undertaker kicking him in the face to send Orton crawling away in a great visual.

One heck of a chair shot drops Randy so Undertaker rakes Orton’s face across the Cell. That lets Cole compare it to a cheese grater to the head, as usual making me wonder why he knows what that is like. Orton is busted open as Undertaker wraps a chain around his throat, followed by a lawn darting into the Cell. Back up and Orton manages an RKO across the top rope (a variation you don’t get very often) for his first major offense.

The steps bounce off of Undertaker’s head to bust him open and adds another chair shot. Undertaker falls back to the floor but manages a headbutt, followed by a whip into the Cell. Back in and Undertaker goes up top (!), only to miss a top rope elbow. Orton brings in a chair as Undertaker falls outside again, with Bob grabbing him by the hair through the Cell. Bob gets punched and kicked in the face to bust him open as well.

Randy jumps Undertaker from behind and powerslams him into the Cell for two on the floor. Back in and Undertaker’s running clothesline gets two, followed by Old School. Snake Eyes into the big boot into the legdrop gets two and it’s a chokeslam to plant Orton. That’s only good for two though as Orton gets his foot on the rope. Normally I would roll my eyes and ask “In the Cell?” but it’s even dumber when they just had a near fall on the floor, meaning falls count anywhere, except in the ropes.

Orton fights back and puts Undertaker on the table for a top rope splash partially through it for two. The Last Ride out of the corner is countered so Undertaker punches out the referee. The RKO connects for no cover so here’s another referee to come in, with Bob (holding the urn), following him.

Undertaker kicks out at two and sits up, setting up the Last Ride. Bob takes out the second referee and gets sent into the Cell to make the blood even worse. Randy counters the Tombstone into one of his own (Tazz: “I’ve never seen anyone do that!”) and Undertaker can’t sit up. He does on the second time, blocks the RKO, urns and Tombstones Bob, and Tombstones Randy for the pin.

Rating: B+. This got going big near the end as it felt like a violent fight instead of a match that happened to take place in the Cell. That’s what the match needed to be and it worked well as Undertaker can still turn it on. Orton got going rather well too, and even though he was in way over his head, it was a heck of a fight that they needed to blow the feud off once and for all.

Undertaker poses on top of the Cell with the urn to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There are two rather good matches on here but that’s not enough to save the rest of this mess. Of the seven matches on the card, three of them felt like they belonged on a pay per view and one of them was a big disappointment. I need a lot more than this for a two hour and forty minute show and it just didn’t work. Smackdown was in a bad place at the moment and while Booker vs. Benoit and the Cell were good, it’s not enough to warrant a pay per view level price.

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Smackdown – December 16, 2005 (2020 Redo): Melina Screws Up

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: December 16, 2005
Location: MassMutual Center, Springfield, Massachusetts
Attendance: 3,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Armageddon and that means it’s going to be a lot more about Undertaker vs. Randy Orton. That’s the most logical way to go when there isn’t much else of note on the card. We do have the Raw vs. Smackdown tag match, but that’s hardly the most thrilling story in the world. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Undertaker’s supernatural stalking of Orton last week. Looking at this all together makes it look a lot dumber.

Opening sequence.

Boogeyman vs. Nunzio

Boogeyman is officially “the weirdest superstar in sports entertainment history”. Vito is here with Nunzio and I can’t imagine that is going to help. The arena is full of smoke and Boogeyman shrugs off some early shots. Worms are consumed and the pumphandle powerslam is good for the fast pin.

Post match, Nunzio is wormed as well.

The roster is watching in the back and Sylvan is disgusted. There are probably twenty people back there. Get more monitors.

Bob Orton is having Randy see a sports psychologist before Sunday.

We look at Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels in the Cell.

Randy is on the psychologist’s couch and says he sees Undertaker everywhere, from in the car next to him to in the mirror behind him. The doctor wants to hear about the Cell and Orton freaks out about the idea even more. He needs some sort of control and the doctor tells him to pick one of two roads before him.

Batista is getting ready when Melina comes in and starts rubbing his shoulders. MNM is ready for their match against Batista and Mysterio but they have to face the Mexicools on Sunday. If Batista will withdraw from the match, she can make it worth his while. Melina winds up on his lap and the camera is no longer needed.

We see some of the Armageddon press conference. How low on the list do you have to be to get that assignment?

Kid Kash vs. Super Crazy

Kash is confused by having all three Mexicools here. Or maybe he’s wondering why they’re on riding lawnmowers. No seriously, why are they on riding lawnmowers? Who thought that was a good idea? Crazy monkey flips him to start and Kash is staggered early on. Kash heads to the apron and grabs a neckbreaker over the top rope to take over. Some knees and kicks keep Crazy in trouble but he grabs a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker. Crazy hits some dropkicks for two and a DDT sets up the moonsault….which only hits mat. The brainbuster gives Kash the pin.

Rating: C. Completely watchable match here as we get ready for Sunday’s title match. I’ll give them points for trying anything else in the cruiserweight division as there is only so much you can do with the same three or four people over and over. Kash might not be the best choice, but he’s better than the same matches over and over for years.

Randy gets done with therapy and tells Bob that he needs to make a decision. We’ll see what that is later.

Melina puts her shirt back on and Batista adjusts his trunks. Melina says they have a deal. Actually no, but Batista thanks her for the warmup. He’s ready to go kill MNM. As usual, Batista comes off as being smarter than everyone else around him, which was an important part of what got him over in the first place.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

Video on Mysterio/Batista vs. Kane/Big Show.

Tag Team Titles: Rey Mysterio/Batista vs. MNM

MNM is defending and Melina is ticked at Batista. Mercury and Rey start things off and there’s the required EDDIE chant. Mysterio starts in on the arm and gets two off an early sunset flip. It’s off to Batista as the arena is still full of smoke from the entrances. Nitro’s superkick is blocked and Batista hammers away in the corner. Mercury comes back in and his forearms have as much effect as you would expect. The champs are both clotheslined to the floor and Rey adds a moonsault to send us to a break.

Back with Rey headscissoring Nitro for two and hitting ten right hands to Mercury in the corner. A distraction lets Nitro hit a slingshot powerbomb for two and there’s a clothesline to the back of Rey’s head. Nitro grabs a backbreaker into a Russian legsweep and Melina pulls Rey outside for a crash.

Back in and Mercury drives Rey back in to keep the ring cut off, because old school wrestling still works if it is done right. Melina has to offer a distraction so the champs can pull Rey back into the corner. Mercury takes him up so Rey snaps off a super hurricanrana, finally allowing the hot tag to Batista. Everything breaks down and the 619 hits Melina. The Batista Bomb finishes Mercury for the pin and the titles.

Rating: C+. This was a formula tag match to make Sunday’s Raw vs. Smackdown match champions vs. champions. Odds are the titles will change back in a few weeks (at most) and while it is annoying that MNM lose the titles again, it’s not like this is anything more than a short form title change. And the Melina/Batista deal was funny for a bonus.

We look at Undertaker chokeslamming Rikishi off the Cell.

Bobby Lashley vs. Paul Burchill

William Regal is with Burchill. Lashley throws him outside to start and hits some shoulders to the ribs in the corner. A belly to belly into the Dominator finishes Burchill in a hurry.

Matt Hardy is ready for Booker T. tonight when JBL, on crutches, interrupts. That’s not cool with Matt, though JBL knocks him down anyway, triggering a brawl.

Teddy Long talks to the psychologist, but the session with Randy is confidential. He thinks the Cell match is barbaric and storms off.

Batista and Rey are happy with their win so here’s Randy to interrupt. Randy congratulates them and we get a tense handshake.

Armageddon rundown, with JBL vs. Matt Hardy added.

One time, Undertaker threw Mankind off the Cell.

Matt Hardy vs. Booker T.

JBL is on commentary and Sharmell, with a broom, is in Booker’s corner. Joined in progress with Booker knocking him into the corner but Matt slugs him over the top. A JBL distraction lets Booker kick away and the chinlock goes on. Matt fights up and hits a neckbreaker into a bulldog for two. There’s the Side Effect to set up the top rope legdrop for two more but Sharmell offers a distraction. JBL gets in the Clothesline and Booker hits the ax kick for the pin.

Rating: C-. Just a match here as we set up Matt vs. JBL on Sunday and keep Booker warm for the US Title match. It’s not like Booker loses anything by having someone interfere either, making this a fairly well put together match. Not that the match itself was good, but the setup was and that’s more important.

Randy tells his dad that yes, he is sure about this.

Video on Tribute to the Troops.

Here’s Randy for his big announcement. He has accomplished a lot in his career, including his Survivor Series success and being a certified legend killer. What he’s learned now though is no one can’t destroy the legend of the Undertaker. Undertaker has destroyed everyone in the Cell but that won’t happen to him.

When he was on that couch, he realized something. He isn’t going to have his grandkids on his lap and let them believe that he gave up. So he’s going out on top, meaning he’s retiring right now. He’s killing his own legend, right now. Cue Teddy Long to say not so fast. If he doesn’t show up on Sunday, it’s going to be a big lawsuit. Randy isn’t happy….and there’s the gong.

Cue the druids followed by the Undertaker so Orton immediately begs off. One of the druids pulls out the urn and it’s Bob Orton, allowing Randy to jump Undertaker. The RKO drops Undertaker but he sits up, meaning Randy chairs him right back down. Another (unprotected) chair shot to the head still can’t keep Undertaker down, though it can bust him open. It’s an urn shot to the head. Orton unloads with the chair and promises to end Undertaker to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was almost all about the Orton vs. Undertaker and Raw vs. Smackdown matches, which works out well enough. Sunday should be a big event and then Raw gets to take the next night off because of Tribute to the Troops. Then we can get on to the Royal Rumble build, which could go a few different ways this time around. Not a bad show here, but it’s getting close to the finish line before we can start the new year in a big way.

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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