205 Live – January 3, 2020: They Failed

IMG Credit: WWE

205 Live
Date: January 3, 2020
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Aiden English

It’s back to this show as we couldn’t just continue with the Best Of format that worked so well to end the show. Angel Garza is the new Cruiserweight Champion and needs something to do around here, which we might start setting up tonight. Or more random matches like back when the show first started. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Garza defeating Lio Rush to win the title in December.

Opening sequence.

The announcers welcome us to the show and Aiden wants to have more fun this year.

Ariya Daivari vs. Danny Burch

During his entrance, Daivari talks about needing to protect the division because he’s a 205 Live original, because we’re still on that for some reason. Daivari runs him over to start and lays on the top as we go to the low camera angle to try and hide the empty seats. Burch works on the arm and takes it to the mat with a headlock.

After a few more headlocks, Burch stomps away in the corner but gets pulled off the middle rope with Burch having to roll outside. Back in and Daivari hits a running knee to the face to set up the chinlock. A reverse DDT gives Daivari two as we continue the match in search of a crowd reaction. Daivari goes to the middle rope, mocks the Jerry Lawler strap drop (ok that was good), and dives into a raised boot.

Burch starts his comeback with uppercuts and the middle rope dropkick, followed by the headbutt for two. The Crossface is broken up in a hurry and Daivari gets his own two off an Iconoclasm. Burch is right back with the Crossface but a masked man, who is pretty clearly Brian Kendrick, jumps the barricade as Daivari taps. The distracted Burch lets go and it’s the hammerlock lariat to finish Burch at 11:29.

Rating: D. It wasn’t even that bad of a match but anything involving Daivari and Kendrick just shows you how dull and stale this show is. Kendrick can do some good things but we’ve seen him so many times now that it doesn’t mean anything. Daivari is far from the worst performer but he’s just so dry and uninteresting with the most generic rich villain character that I groan every time I see him. Terribly uninteresting match, as tends to be the case around here far too often.

Post match Kendrick reintroduces himself to the crowd and talks about starting the cruiserweight division. He wants someone to do something and hits Sliced Bread #2 on Burch. Kendrick smiles at Daivari and DEAR GOODNESS NOT AN ALLIANCE BETWEEN THESE TWO! Come on already people.

Sunil Singh is now a father. That’s rather nice.

We hear about some of the great things to happen to the Singh Brothers in 2019 and Aiden’s resolution of having more fun is ruined.

Singh Brothers vs. Corey Storm/Anthony Wayne

Storm is from OVW for Tom is now a Singhs fan. Wayne gets kneed down to start and it’s a double elbow to the face to make it worse. Storm (Casey according to Tom) comes in and gets stomped down in the corner until Samir is accidentally whipped into the buckle. It’s back to Wayne who looks a bit confused, only to have Sunil kick him in the face. The Bollywood Blast finishes at 2:21.

Tony Nese vs. Angel Garza

Non-title. Garza bails to the floor to start and says it’s his time with the amount of empty seats depressing me even more. They do it again with Garza getting some kisses on the cheek before heading inside to offer a handshake. Nese shoves him away and waistlocks him down as they finally do something.

That means we get some bragging about the abs as commentary has to acknowledge the complete silence from the fans. They fight over a test of strength for a bit until Garza gets in a springboard wristdrag. Garza avoids a whip into the ropes and…..Nese won’t let him TAKE OFF HIS PANTS! They head outside with Nese being sent into the steps so Garza can VIVA MEXICO. Fans: “THIS IS AWFUL!”

Back in and Garza gets two off a kick to the chest, followed by a hanging reverse DDT for the same. Nese finally crotches him on top and we hit the bodyscissors because the fans need a reason to lose even more energy. Garza gets back up and they trade kicks to the face for a double knockdown. The comeback is on with some clotheslines and there’s a wristdrag into the corner. Now GARZA CAN TAKE OFF HIS PANTS and a superkick gets two.

Nese palm strikes him down and snaps off a hurricanrana. They botch….something that looked like a sunset flip and Nese has to fall on top for two. Nese sends him outside again and Garza hits a middle rope moonsault but the Wing Clipper is countered into a suplex. Nese’s Boston crab sends Garza crawling to the rope and they’re back up. Finally willing to put the match out of its misery, Garza blocks the Lionsault and hits the Wing Clipper for the pin at 13:44.

Rating: D-. This is a complicated one because there are two factors at play here. First of all, the match wasn’t very good because they didn’t have a lot of chemistry together and Garza’s charisma was turned off for some reason. That being said, these two were left out there to die in front of a crowd that wouldn’t have reacted had Steve Austin and Hulk Hogan gone out there and had a match. The crowd shook them as they’re capable of having a perfectly good match but we got this disaster instead. A lot of it was their fault but they were in a no win situation.

Overall Rating: F. I know I’ve said this several times before but if this didn’t kill off 205 Live, nothing is going to. Look at this show and tell me what in the world was good about the whole thing. The crowd just was not interested and most of them had left by the time the show was over. What are the wrestlers supposed to do? They’re put in a situation where they can’t do anything about it and the company isn’t willing to change a thing about the show. Awful show in no way is it entirely on the wrestlers.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 10, 2020: In Case It Wasn’t Boring Enough

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 10, 2020
Location: Ford Center Evansville, Evansville, Indiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

We’re getting closer to the Royal Rumble and things started to pick up a lot this week on Raw. Therefore, you can probably assume the same thing here because these shows tend to follow each other. I’m sure we’ll get more from Roman Reigns vs. King Corbin now that the Usos are back, because this feud just needs to keep going. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

It’s MizTV to get things going. People have said Miz has changed since his issues with Bray Wyatt but last week was just a bad day. Sometimes people want to tell you to smile but he didn’t want to do that last week. He wants to apologize to Kofi Kingston for what he said last week but he has been going through a lot. One of the few bright spots has been the return of an old friend though, so here is the returning John Morrison as his guest.

We get a highlight package of Morrison’s time in WWE and he talks about his big comeback. He was promised new music, a new shirt, a team of pomeranians pulling him to the ring at the Royal Rumble (Morrison: “Small dogs only because there’s only one big dog around here.”), but he’s been doing some thinking. The more he thinks about last week, the more disappointed he is in the fans. Miz had one bad day and the fans say he sucks?

These people don’t know what it’s like to be in the ring but here’s New Day to interrupt. Big E. thinks Miz is such a bad actor that he couldn’t be cast as the back end of a centipede. With that image out of the way, Kofi talks about how Miz should have just said he had a bad day and it would have been so much better. Miz respects Kofi’s six month reign as WWE Champion but not the six seconds it took him to lose the title right back. Kofi says Miz is changing and he sucks….and that’s it in an abrupt ending as we need a commercial.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

Morrison and big E. are on commentary. Feeling out process to start with Kofi dropkicking him into the corner before we go to a far too long look at the commentary table. Miz knees him in the ribs as Morrison asks why Kofi didn’t give Big E. a title shot during his six months as champion. Kofi elbows him in the face as Big E. explains that the team is a brotherhood and they were all World Champion at the same time. A suicide dive takes Miz out but he shoves Kofi into Big E. as we take a break.

Back with Kofi fighting out of a chinlock with Morrison and Big E. off commentary. Miz goes after the knee to cut Kofi off and hits some YES Kicks. The Skull Crushing Finale is blocked and Kofi gets two off the SOS. Miz charges into a kick to the face in the corner but kicks the knee out of the air and slaps on the Figure Four. With that broken up, Morrison dives onto Big E. and the distracted Kofi walks into the Skull Crushing Finale for the pin at 11:29.

Rating: C. You knew the 50/50 booking was coming as soon as this match was announced as we set up a likely Tag Team Title match at the Rumble. That’s a rather interesting match on paper and I can go for cocky Morrison as something for him to do. It’s not like this show is dying for faces as you could argue Otis is one of the top faces on the show at this point.

It’s time for the Firefly Fun House with Bray saying he loves everyone here. That feels special but not everyone is worthy. He means Daniel Bryan because whatever the opposite of what love is is what HE feels about Bryan. Daniel has been naughty lately and he’s in a heap of trouble at the Royal Rumble.

First, the Fiend wanted him to remember, and we get some clips of Bryan’s time in the Wyatt Family, plus his rebellion. Then he wanted to change Bryan, with clips of the haircut. Now that Bryan wants the title, HE wants to destroy Bryan. Bray: “Bye! I love you! Not you Daniel!” I’m as shocked as you are that WWE actually remembered a history between these two from so long ago but it’s rather nice to see for a change.

Sonya Deville is happy for a new year for Fire & Desire but Mandy Rose seems distracted. Sonya leaves so Mandy pulls out a box, which seems to be a gift.

Here’s Elias for a song. He sings about the Royal Rumble, including about how he’ll win and how much more interesting he is than Brock, mainly because he’s actually here.

Mandy, with the box, comes up to Heavy Machinery. She apologizes for letting Dolph stomp on his mom’s fruit cake (a line you will only hear in wrestling) and made him something to make up for it. It’s a cake that says I’m Sorry but she has to go have her match…and we’re off to a break before anything else can be said because this show feels very rushed.

Alexa Bliss vs. Mandy Rose

Bliss and Nikki Cross are both in the Rumble. They shove each other to start and Bliss doesn’t like it, earning Rose a slap to the face. Another slap puts Rose on the floor for a baseball slide but Sonya offers a distraction. Cross breaks that up but Mandy gets in a knee to the head for two. They trade kicks to the face and a double clothesline puts them both down. Bliss is up first with Insult To Injury….and here’s Heavy Machinery with the cake. The distraction lets Rose grab a rollup for the pin at 4:02.

Rating: D. What was this supposed to be? They needed to have the freshly face Bliss lose to the distraction rollup here? Right after they announced her as one of the first names in the Rumble? This felt like one of the most standard WWE booking tropes around and it came after a match that seemed to exist to fill time until the finish. I like the Mandy and Otis stuff though, just because of the weird charisma that Otis has.

Mandy smiles at Otis.

Lacey Evans vs. Sasha Banks

Hold on though as Bayley pops up on screen to say Sasha is AWOL tonight and even a jar head like Lacey can understand that. Bayley is here tonight because she has to be so Lacey talks about how she loves to be in the heartland. She wants a title match tonight but Bayley isn’t her kid and won’t be doing what Lacey says. Lacey goes to the back and gets jumped by Bayley, who says put on her mom jeans and go home. Referees break it up.

We recap last week’s main event with the Fiend attacking Daniel Bryan.

Bryan says Fiend wants a lot and Bryan does remember the Wyatt Family. He also remembers outsmarting them and Fiend must not be happy with that. Then Fiend wants him to change so Bryan feels more dangerous. The one thing Fiend can change about him is that he can’t be broken. Ramblin Rabbit pops up on screen behind him and offers to tell Bryan the secret to defeating the Fiend but Bray grabs him and says snitches get snitches. Bryan nods a bit. I need scenes of Bryan trying to meet with Rabbit in secret to get information, preferably in wacky costumes with false identities.

Braun Strowman vs. Shinsuke Nakamura

Non-title and Nakamura has Sami Zayn and Cesaro with him. Nakamura avoids a charge in the corner to start and starts striking away but runs into a big boot. Now the running splash in the corner connects but Sami pulls Nakamura to the floor before a second can hit. A distraction lets Nakamura post Strowman and we take a break. Back with Nakamura kicking Strowman down for two and putting on the chinlock.

Another kick to the face looks to set up a middle rope shot to the head, only to have Strowman clothesline him out of the air. The forearm to the chest gets two but Nakamura hits a running dropkick. A running knee to the head connects for two more but Strowman is back with a spinebuster. Cesaro tries to bring in a chair and Nakamura tries to bring in the title but Strowman just powerslams him for the pin at 9:35.

Rating: C. I kind of liked this one and I could go for another one, even though I’m not sure I can imagine Strowman winning the title. That’s his deal: look unstoppable in the build and then get stopped when it matters most. Normally I would say he has to win this time but I’ve said it so many times that I don’t believe it myself anymore.

Post match Strowman holds up the title but Sami runs in and takes it back.

Sheamus calls Shorty G. an example of everything wrong with Smackdown since he left. Small is something to be crushed and disposed of because size does matter. Sheamus wants to embrace chaos.

Bryan finds a present in his locker room. It’s a deformed Ramblin Rabbit, who has had half of his head ripped off.

Here’s Roman Reigns for a chat before the main event. He’s been dealing with King Corbin and his friends so Reigns knew he needed friends. This time he needed more though so he needed family. This is going to be his year and he’s going to win the Royal Rumble so he can move on and main event Wrestlemania for the fifth time. He’ll do it with the Usos by his side.

Cue the Usos to say they have this show on lockdown. Corbin disrespected the family with the dog food but this brings out Corbin and Ziggler to say the three of them are scared. Reigns would love to beat up Corbin twice in one night so they should fight twice at the Rumble. Corbin agrees and is now in the Rumble as well. The Usos hit big dives and the main event is next.

Usos vs. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler

Jimmy shoulders Ziggler down to start and it’s a double elbow drop for two. Corbin comes in for a clothesline and Jimmy gets caught in the wrong corner. Some right hands in the corner stagger Corbin a bit and a jumping enziguri puts him down. Jimmy goes up but here’s the Revival to distract him, meaning Ziggler can send him into the barricade.

Cue Reigns (Why did he leave?) to beat up the Revival and we take a break. Back with Jey hitting the running hip attack in the corner but diving onto Corbin, who pulls him out of the air. Corbin sends Jey into Reigns so Jimmy superkicks Ziggler to set up the Superfly Splash. Back up and Corbin gets speared down by Reigns for the DQ at 8:55.

Rating: C. You knew someone was going to get disqualified here as the Usos may be back but we can’t have Corbin and Ziggler lose because they’re the major heels. The Usos looked like their old selves and that’s rather good as they’re still one of the best teams in the world. Just find someone more interesting for them to face.

Post match Robert Roode returns and hits the Glorious DDT on Reigns on the floor. The Usos get laid out as well and it’s a spinebuster/elbow drop to put Reigns through the table to end the show. Just in case you weren’t overwhelmed by the levels of boring in Corbin and Ziggler already, now Roode is back.

Overall Rating: D+. Not a very good show here, though again you can see where each of the stories are going and you know what they’re going for in each case. Now that doesn’t mean that they’re very good or interesting, but that’s more about the booking and the way the wrestlers are presented. Tonight we had two distraction finishes, a failed distraction finish and a DQ. That’s not much on a show that included two half hour segment/match portions. There are good parts to the show but the presentation isn’t that interesting and it’s becoming more and more of a problem.

Results

The Miz b. Kofi Kingston – Skull Crushing Finale

Mandy Rose b. Alexa Bliss – Rollup

Braun Strowman b. Shinsuke Nakamura – Running powerslam

King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler b. Usos via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – January 2, 2020: Please Be The New Kind

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: January 2, 2020
Location: XL Center, Hartford, Connecticut
Commentators: Byron Saxton, Mickie James

It’s a new year and…yeah nothing is going to change around here is it? That’s just how things work around Main Event and that is going to be the case almost every single week. The last few weeks without the matches were rather nice and unfortunately I don’t think that’s going to be the case going forward. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Chelsea Green vs. Sarah Logan

Logan goes straight for the armbar so Green forearms her in the face. A kick to the ribs puts Green on the floor and a headbutt knocks her silly back inside. Green grabs a side slam and puts on a camel clutch, followed by a running dropkick to the side of the head. That’s fine with Logan, who BLASTS her with some forearms and gets two off a bridging suplex. Running knees in the corner get the same on Green, who pulls Logan face first into the middle buckle. An Unprettier gives Green the pin at 5:24.

Rating: C. That was a rather snappy little match and the two of them looked solid out there. Green is brand new and it’s cool to see her putting in this kind of effort so early on. I’m not sure if she was the top choice to jump up to the main roster with so little time in NXT but she has shown she is good enough to hang at this level.

From Smackdown.

The Miz vs. Daniel Bryan vs. King Corbin

The winner gets Wyatt at the Rumble, though Cole calls Bryan the Fiend as we get things started. Miz and Bryan kick away at Corbin to start so he bails to the floor, leaving Miz to roll Bryan up at one. Bryan posts Miz on the floor and hits the big running knee off the apron, only to get sent over the barricade by Corbin (with Bryan seeming to hurt his knee). The chokebreaker drops Miz as well and it’s Corbin completely dominating early on. Back in and the Reality Check drops Corbin, setting up the running corner dropkicks. Corbin runs both of them over though and we take a break.

We come back with Miz and Bryan trading near falls until Miz sends him outside. Miz fires off the kicks to Corbin in the corner, including some to the leg to set up the Figure Four. Bryan comes in with the headbutt for the save and gets two, as Miz looks on in shock for a cool visual. The hold is turned over so Bryan grabs the LeBell Lock on Corbin in a combination you don’t often see.

With that broken up, the End of Days gets two on Miz as Corbin has to make a save. There’s the running knee to Corbin but Ziggler runs in for the superkick to give Corbin two as Reigns makes the save. Reigns knocks Corbin over the barricade and we take another break. We come back with Corbin and Reigns gone, leaving Miz to hit the running corner clothesline.

Bryan gets taken up top and it’s a super shinbreaker (that’s a new one) to work on the knee. A Codebreaker to the knee drops Bryan again and a DDT to the other leg has Bryan in more trouble. Bryan grabs a quick cross armbreaker but Miz bites his hand to break up the LeBell Lock. The running knee is countered into the Skull Crushing Finale for two so Miz goes right back to the Figure Four. That’s reversed as well and Bryan slaps on the LeBell Lock for the tap at 20:18.

Rating: C+. They went with some different stuff here and of course we can’t beat Corbin because the show needs his head or whatever they want to call it. At least they got to the right result and we can move on to the big Fiend vs. Bryan rematch. That being said, oh come on with starting with the triple threat, going to a singles match and then doing a triple threat which turned into a singles. You think they might be overdoing it a bit there?

Post match Bray pops up on screen to say Bryan is about to have all kinds of fun. See, HE isn’t done with Bryan so Bray wants to know if Bryan will let him in. Bryan: “YES!”

Video on the AOP and Seth Rollins’ path of destruction.

From Raw.

Here’s an annoyed Kevin Owens to get things going. Owens gets right to the point and promises fireworks for what happened last week. We see a clip of Seth Rollins and the AOP laying out Samoa Joe last week. Owens promises to take one of them out with him because he saw someone he respects get taken out.

That would be Rey Mysterio, and it made him sick to see Mysterio get beaten down a few weeks back. The beatdown is why Andrade defeated Mysterio for the United States Title and we see a clip of the title change. Cue Rollins and the AOP to say this wasn’t Seth’s decision. He was forced into this roll and now the AOP will enforce his will.

The fight is on with Owens getting crushed in the corner, only to have Samoa Joe come down for the save. Joe beats up the AOP and chokes Rollins but AOP comes back in. Owens makes the next save with some chair shots to the back as security comes down to break it up. Owens hits a bit flip dive onto the three of them plus security, with Joe joining in.

Here’s what’s coming on next week’s Raw.

No Way Jose vs. Mojo Rawley

This is becoming the new Dana Brooke vs. Sarah Logan. Rawley actually gets promo time (!) saying that of course Jose is partying because he does it every day. Here in Hartford, nothing is changing because the people aren’t smart enough to understand what he’s talking about. Instead, Mojo will just embarrass Jose again.

Jose hammers away in the corner to start and it’s an armdrag into a dropkick to put Mojo on the floor. Back from a break with Mojo hitting a flapjack and firing off the shoulders in the corner. Jose fights back again and hits a high crossbody for two, only to get Pounced straight back down. A Backstabber gives Jose two more but Mojo crotches him on top. The running punch finishes Jose at 10:04.

Rating: C. These two have fought each other so many times that it doesn’t mean anything anymore, despite their matches being pretty watchable. Neither is going to be getting anywhere anytime soon and that has to be setting in for them. At least they’re still trying, which is a good sign for both of them, though I don’t know what kind of a future they have.

From Raw to wrap it up.

It’s wedding time…with a big cake in the corner. Lashley in a sleeveless, shirtless tuxedo but Lana on the other hand is in a VERY short wedding dress and seems rather enthralled. The minister gives the big intro about how great marriage is and how it leads to personal growth. Lana does NOT want a baby though, because it would turn her into someone ugly like the fans. She insists that the minister read the script, so he asks Lashley if he’s REALLY sure.

They get to read their own vows but Lana screeches about the fans chanting RUSEV DAY and how they’re trying to make this day anyone but her. Lana tells Lashley about how awesome she is and starts her own LANA DAY chant. She’s so happy that she wants to jump on him right now….and so she does.

With that broken up, Lana hands Lashley the vows she wrote for him. Lashley reads the very complimentary statements about Lana but has to pause for the WHAT chants. Those don’t sit well with Lana, who spells her name because it’s WHO, not WHAT. He finally wraps it up, with the minister saying that was different. The ring statements go on so long that Lana says “ok we’ve got it, thank you.”

Now we get to the part the minister really dreads and he asks if anyone has reason why they shouldn’t be married. This brings out an unidentified man who says that he’s Lana’s first husband. They got married when she was 18 and then she left him for Rusev, just like she’ll leave Lashley for someone else. Lashley chokeslams him so the minister asks again, which draws out Lashley’s first wife (Minister: “WHO ARE YOU???”), who Lana didn’t seem to know about. Lana beats her up so we ask one more time….and here’s Liv Morgan.

She talks about how she was a lost soul earlier this year but the love of her life brought her to where she needed to be. How could they do this to her? Lashley insists he never laid a finger on her (Minister: “OH COME ON!”), but Liv is talking about Lana. That finally gives the fans something to care about and Liv is near tears, only to be driven into the corner.

A flower pot to the head starts the catfight as Lashley isn’t sure what to do. They’re taken to the floor but Lana gets back in so we can try this one more time. Cue Rusev out of the cake and the fight is on again, with Liv getting back in as the wedding set is destroyed. Lana gets sent into the cake but manages to slap Rusev to end the show.

This was REALLY long at nearly thirty minutes, including an eleven minute overrun. The Liv stuff is at least a twist, but it took so long to get here (both tonight and for the last three months) that it didn’t have much of an impact. This could have been worse, but they needed to cut out a lot of the same stuff going on over and over again.

Overall Rating: C+. Better show than usual here as the two matches surprised me in a good way each. The wedding is what matters the most here though as it was the big angle to end the year. That being said, the thing gets a little better each time I see it, putting it dangerously in the realm of watchable. This gives me no extra confidence for next week, but it’s nice to have a decent week like this one.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – August 8, 2005: Can We Go Back To School Yet?

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 8, 2005
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 11,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’re less than two weeks away from Summerslam and the card is looking decent at best. You can see most of if not all of the card, but at the same time they have a few things left to set up or at least push. If nothing else, we need Hulk Hogan to actually respond to Shawn Michaels and that is going to take place tonight. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Eric Bischoff trying to stack the deck to get the World Title off of John Cena last week, complete with Carlito and Chris Jericho managing to pull defeat out of the jaws of victory. Jericho did manage to bust Cena open and steal the title though, in a move that almost always works.

Opening sequence.

Here are Eugene and Christy Hemme for the Gold Medal Invitational, but first Eugene, in a Hulk Hogan shirt, needs to talk about how awesome Hogan is. Christy says this is about Eugene though and does the GIVE ME AN E deal, only to have Kurt Angle interrupt. Angle says he’s the hometown hero this week and he’s getting his medals back.

As you might guess, the fans are not happy with Eugene here and Angle saying Pittsburgh doesn’t need Hulk Hogan when they have him makes it even worse. They even get in an argument over whether or not Eugene is a gold medalist because that’s what these fans want to hear. Eugene isn’t happy with Angle swearing so we start in a hurry.

Eugene vs. Kurt Angle

Angle kicks him into the corner to start but stops to yell at the referee. A backbreaker gets two on Eugene, who drives Angle into the corner. The referee takes a shot to the back of the head but Eugene says it was Angle and the referee believes him. A shot to the face drops Eugene as we’re already halfway through. Eugene is sent face first into the buckle and that’s enough to fire him up again. Angle grabs the release German suplex to cut that off in a hurry but the Angle Slam is escaped. Instead Angle charges into the referee and that’s a DQ to keep the medal on Eugene.

Post match Angle destroys Eugene but Hogan makes the save, with Angle, the HOMETOWN HERO, getting beaten up again. Who thought this was a good idea? I mean other than Hulk of course. Posing ensues and the fans don’t seem overly interested.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Chris Masters

Lawler and Coach shushing JR during Masters’ entrance works for some reason. Masters grabs a headlock to start so Benjamin takes him down with a dragon screw legwhip. A slam puts Benjamin down but Masters nearly botches the elbow drop as Shelton tries to roll away. The bearhug goes on as JR is sounding a little uncomfortable with how much Lawler and Coach enjoy looking at Masters. Shelton is back with a jawbreaker and running kneelift to set up a high crossbody for two. A sleeper doesn’t work well though as Masters kicks him low, setting up the Masterlock for the win.

Rating: D. I know I bring this up a lot but WHAT HAPPENED TO SHELTON??? He holds the Intercontinental Title for the better part of a year and then he’s putting over everyone on the roster. Unless there was some sort of a backstage issue, I really don’t get the moves here, but it’s rather annoying and frustrating at the same time.

A very pleased Angle leaves Bischoff’s office. He’s got another shot at the medals at Summerslam but there’s no time limit, so Angle can hurt him as much as he wants.

Rob Conway isn’t worried about Viscera and hits on Maria a bit. Viscera comes in and asks Conway if he’s part of the Village People and belts out some YMCA. A brawl nearly starts but Viscera threatens Visagra before leaving. JR: “Is that what you’re taking King?”

We recap Matt Hardy’s invasions, leading to him being rehired last week.

Edge and Lita think rehiring Matt is brilliant because now he can do whatever he wants to Matt at Summerslam. Matt’s promo last week was pathetic because he should have been able to manage so much more after what he had been through. Edge points to his eyes and says this is passion and intensity. Lita left Matt for him after Matt never proposed in six years.

See, Matt should really be thanking Edge because he had never gotten reactions like this until he rode Edge’s coattails into the main event. Edge was facing main eventers while Matt was defending the Cruiserweight Title. Matt is here now because his girlfriend fell in love with a main eventer. We’re thirteen minutes into Matt’s fifteen minutes of fame and time is up at Summerslam. Very intense promo from Edge, whose facials were awesome as usual. I’m not sure how much the average fan is going to care, but it was some great delivery and much more of an insider’s promo than usual.

Rob Conway vs. Viscera

Conway tries some big forearms in the corner to start so Viscera hits the overhand chop to cut that off in a hurry. There’s a swinging Boss Man Slam, allowing Viscera to hit the hip swiveling. Conway dropkicks the knee and drops some elbows on it, only to get pulled into the Visagra. Back up and Viscera tries a slam, only to have the leg give out so Conway can fall on top for the pin. Conway is good in the role but they don’t have long to waste him in matches like this. He doesn’t have a lot of depth to his character and if it’s all stuff against people on Viscera’s level, fans aren’t going to be interested for long.

Hurricane/Rosey/Stacy Keibler vs. Heartthrobs/Victoria

Antonio punches Hurricane in the face to start so Hurricane takes him down with a fireman’s carry. Romeo comes in for a double Russian legsweep and a jumping elbow gets two. The Throbs miss a double dropkick and it’s Rosey coming in to no reaction. Stacy offers a little shake though and everything breaks down, only to have Victoria slam her into the barricade. A double STO finishes Rosey back inside. I know the Tag Team Titles don’t have the best history but this has to be close to the bottom of the whole lineage. They haven’t been defended in weeks and this is practically the whole division.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel, with the pyro seemingly going off later than expected as Jericho gets cut off mid-sentence. His guest this week is Eric Bischoff, who of course is Jericho’s close friend. They shake hands a few times, leaving Bischoff to talk about how Cena’s music career (including his music video premiering tonight) is the only thing he’ll have left after Summerslam.

Jericho has his own music video, showing him beating down Cena last week to Fozzy’s To Kill A Stranger. Bischoff isn’t happy with what happened last week though and that is due to referee Chad Patton, who counted the pin when Jericho was taken out. Patton comes out and gets slapped around by both of them, setting this up.

Chad Patton vs. Chris Jericho

Bischoff is referee and Patton actually drives Jericho into the corner to start before the beating is on. Patton loses most of his shirt and here’s Carlito to make it worse. Jericho chokes away and chops Patton against the ropes, leaving Carlito to get in some shots on the floor. A spinebuster into the Walls make Patton tap, with Bischoff taking his time to call for the bell.

Post match Jericho won’t let go so here’s Cena for the save (including a mistimed flying shoulder to Carlito, which hits him in the knee).

Post break Bischoff makes Cena vs. Carlito/Jericho.

And now, in case this show hasn’t been enough of a waste of time, it’s the Diva Search. We do get some good news: this stupid thing is over next week and Kristal is cut. Earlier today, everyone else had the chance to get the fans’ votes but things weren’t going to go according to plan.

Ashley gave her phone number but took a pie to the face to cut things off.

Leyla was holding up a sign and suggesting she was sans clothing when a pie to the face showed that wasn’t the case.

Elizabeth talked about having the fans’ support and didn’t really stop when the pie hit her.

Matt Hardy vs. Snitsky

Hardy starts slugging away early on and kicks Snitsky in the face for the first knockdown. A spinebuster cuts Hardy off and there’s a clothesline to put him down again. There’s a suplex so Snitsky can beat on his chest, setting up a side slam for two. The pumphandle slam is countered though and Snitsky misses a big boot in the corner, setting up a Twist of Fate out of the corner for the pin.

Rating: D. And that’s it for Matt’s chances at meaning anything as he was just a guy here. He was a bit more aggressive but it’s not like this was any star making performance. The run-ins were good, but I really wouldn’t have had him get in the ring until Summerslam. Not a good match and it killed Hardy’s aura.

Post match Edge runs in to jump Matt but referees break it up.

Post break Matt jumps Edge but gets pulled away again.

Here’s John Cena’s new music video for the song Right Now.

It’s time for the big main event argument as Hulk Hogan and Shawn Michaels go face to face, with Jerry Lawler moderating. Lawler asks if Shawn is jealous but Shawn talks about Hogan being nice enough to show up here for a change. Hogan’s life offers nothing Shawn could want because Hogan can’t touch him in this ring. All of Hogan’s personality means nothing at Summerslam because Hogan can’t hold a candle to him.

Hogan is asked about the Larry King segment but Shawn cuts him off to say that Hogan has to deal with the truth for the first time ever. Shawn is the first person who won’t buckle in front of Hogan because no one is going to fire him. He’s been fired so many times but WWE keeps bringing him back because this place doesn’t exist without him. Hogan finally cuts him off and says Shawn is making this too personal. If Shawn wanted a match, all he had to do was ask. Instead Shawn cheap shotted him, and all Hogan had to do was call Bret Hart to hear about that.

Shawn smiles at that one and promises that Hogan is next. Hogan: “When you left the WWE for seven years, you said it was because you lost your smile.” I’ll let you try to figure out Hogan’s version of history on that one as Hogan talks about being her for the fans’ smiles. He asks Shawn what he’s going to do so Shawn’s shirt comes off…so he can superkick Lawler. The fight with Hogan is on and it’s a big boot so Hogan can throw Shawn outside. A lot of posing ends the show.

The Bret line was good but Shawn is carrying every bit of these promos and the feud as a whole, which is going to make the reactions at Summerslam rather interesting. It’s almost hard to get annoyed at Shawn here as he is saying a lot of things that are very true, but Hogan is going to do his usual stuff at Summerslam and get cheered because he’s Hogan (fair enough). Shawn is the more interesting one here though and that’s making things a little more interesting.

Overall Rating: D-. The interesting thing here was that while the show could have been worse, it felt like a complete waste of time. There are three big Raw matches taking place at Summerslam but how interesting are they going to be? Hardy lost a ton tonight because he was mostly just his old self, Jericho vs. Cena is a lame Austin clone and Shawn vs. Hogan sells itself. The rest of the show was awful and it remains clear that there is nothing outside of the three Summerslam matches going on around here.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – January 6, 2020: The New Year In The Ring

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 6, 2020
Location: Chesapeake Energy Arena, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Jerry Lawler

It’s a big night as we get some fallout from last week’s messy/controversial wedding plus the return of Brock Lesnar as we are less than three weeks away from the Royal Rumble. That means things need to pick up in a hurry and something needs to be done around here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap from the wedding, focusing on Liv Morgan’s big surprise of course.

Opening sequence.

Here are Brock Lesnar and Paul Heyman for a chat. Heyman talks about Brock wondering who will be facing him at the Royal Rumble but realizing that no one from Raw, Smackdown or NXT is worthy. That’s why Brock is going to do something unprecedented, which is what he does. Brock promised to beat the Undertaker at Wrestlemania and then he did it. So what is his next unprecedented move? Brock is entering the Royal Rumble at #1 so he can fight twenty nine people at once. Heyman promises Lesnar will throw everyone out and win the whole thing and yes, that is a spoiler. No word on if the title will be on the line.

I saw someone suggest this same idea somewhere else and it’s an interesting idea. I’d prefer this over having Lesnar face and destroy someone else like he’d done over the last few years, though I’m almost scared to imagine who we might get as the person who throws Lesnar out. Still though, interesting idea.

Rey Mysterio is fired up for his United States Title shot and thanks his son for being his inspiration. Tonight, he’s taking the title back to represent Latinos.

United States Title: Andrade vs. Rey Mysterio

Andrade is defending and has Zelina Vega with him. Andrade starts punching away to start so Rey climbs onto his shoulders so they can fall outside. A victory roll sends Andrade face first into the steps and Zelina panics. Back in and Andrade dropkicks him out of the air as we take a break.

Back with both guys staggered but Rey gets to the apron for a springboard seated senton. The tornado DDT gets two but Andrade ties him in the ropes. The top rope double stomp misses so Rey tries the sliding sunset bomb, only to have Andrade roll through and hit double knees to put Rey down again. Back in and Rey busts out a Canadian Destroyer to knock Andrade silly for the pin….but Vega got the foot on the rope just in time. Rey celebrates but we have to keep going so we take another break.

We come back with Rey hitting a running hurricanrana off the apron to send Andrade crashing into the barricade. A sunset bomb sends Andrade into the post and the springboard Fameasser gives Rey two more. Andrade is back with a wheelbarrow faceplant for the same but Rey hurricanranas him into the ropes for the 619.

Andrade manages to roll outside so Rey dives onto Zelina by mistake. The distraction lets Andrade send him into the post and Rey is staggered. He’s so banged up that the referee breaks up the hammerlock DDT so Rey staggers to the floor, where he seems to check on Zelina. Back in and the hammerlock DDT retains the title at 19:52.

Rating: B. These two are incapable of having a bad match and WWE knows they can put them out there for a good match every single time. I’m curious about how they’re going somewhere with the tensions between Andrade and Vega, though Andrade getting the big win is what matters most here.

Post match Andrade rips off Rey’s mask. A Rumble rematch with some stipulations could work well.

We look back at Samoa Joe and Kevin Owens fighting back against the AOP.

Owens and Joe confirm that they are usually out for themselves, but Joe has someone to join in with them. Joe tells Owens not to worry about who it is.

The AOP doesn’t seem thrilled but Rollins isn’t worried. Rollins has overcome challenges forever and is used to it because he is the chosen one of Monday Night Raw. Anyone who steps up to them will be taken care of by the AOP.

Tag Team Titles: OC vs. Viking Raiders vs. Street Profits

The Raiders are defending but first, the Profits say they’re blinging in the new decade. Tonight, they want the smoke. Erik throws Anderson down to start and it’s Ivar coming in to send him face first into Erik’s knee. A blind tag lets Dawkins come in to dropkick Anderson but Ford does the same, meaning it’s a flip off with Ivar.

Gallows, a self described non-fan of cartwheels, unloads on Ford in the corner before Anderson knocks Ford down for two. That’s enough waiting around for the Raiders as they both come in to clean house with Gallows having to save Ford after the Viking Experience. Everyone fights to the floor with the OC getting the better of things as we take a break. Back with Anderson chinlocking Erik but the comeback is on in a hurry.

Erik jumps over Anderson in the corner and dives over for the hot tag to Erik. House is cleaned in a hurry but the Bronco Buster misses. Dawkins and Eric tag themselves in with the spinebuster into the frog splash connecting on Erik. Ivar makes the save and it’s Ford hitting the running flip dive onto Gallows and Dawkins. That leaves Anderson to get powerbombed into a splash from Ivar to retain the titles at 15:13.

Rating: B-. This was the kind of action packed match that you would have expected here, though I’m curious to see who the Vikings can face now. There isn’t really anyone left but the AOP and the good thing is that doesn’t need much of a build. Just let them hit each other a lot at the Rumble and everything will be fine.

Joe won’t say who the partner is but he’ll show Owens. They go to a locker room and Owens sees the partner, which makes him very happy.

Here’s Becky Lynch to talk about her match with Asuka. Becky has been the confident champion but now she needs to rethink things. Yeah she’s been on the cereal boxes and walked the red carpets but there is one person she can’t beat. We see clips of Asuka beating her multiple times but here’s Asuka to cut her off. Asuka shouts in Japanese but Becky punches her down and walks off.

Mojo Rawley gets to look inside Erick Rowan’s cage and screams a lot.


We recap the US Title match.

Andrade and Zelina brag about the win but here’s an unmasked Rey to jump Andrade from behind and take the mask back. With the mask on again, Mysterio steals the title and leaves.

Erick Rowan vs. KJ Orso

Rowan grabs him before the bell and says he knows Orso wants to see what’s in the cage. Orso gets back inside and says bring it on so Rowan kicks him in the face. The Iron Claw is good for the pin at 23 seconds.

Post match Rowan puts Orso’s head near the cage and Orso comes up with a bloody face, sending him running away.

AJ Styles vs. Akira Tozawa

We see a clip of last week’s surprise RKO from Randy Orton, who faces AJ again next week. Tozawa kicks away to start but AJ gets in a shot out of the corner. The Phenomenal Forearm connects, but AJ pulls him up at two. A Randy Orton hanging DDT drops Tozawa again and an RKO gives AJ the pin at 2:20.

Post match AJ strikes Orton’s pose to really rub it in. AJ leaves and a fan runs in so security deals with him as we take a break.

We look at the wedding again.

Here are Lashley and Lana with the minister from last week in the ring (apparently the minister was the fan, which would be some major miscommunication). Lana is furious about last week and wants things made right so they get married in a hurry, because the minister can officiate weddings in multiple states.

Lana kicks the minister out for being boring but still doesn’t seem happy. It’s because of all these people here who don’t want to see this ring on her finger. Last week a bunch of exes came out to interrupt the wedding over and over again because so many people are so jealous of their love. Lashley says Rusev is the sorriest of them all but here’s Rusev on the screen, standing in front of a superimposed island.

Since Lana and Lashley didn’t have a honeymoon, he’s taking it for them. But first, he needs to give them their wedding gift: a wedding album, with pictures from last week’s fiasco. Lana rants about how much she hates Rusev….and Lashley tells her to shut up. Lashley says Rusev used to be a man but they need to fight one more time. Rusev agrees to fight him next week and the Bulgarian Brute will be back. There was no reference to or mention of Liv Morgan.

R-Truth is ready for the new decade but Liv Morgan interrupts to say she’ll be in Rusev’s corner next week. It’s a moment she lives for.

Charlotte vs. Sarah Logan

Logan jumps her before the bell and they fight to the floor with Charlotte hammering away against the barricade. They go into the crowd for a bit until Charlotte throws her back over, only to get posed for her efforts. With Charlotte down, Logan grabs the robe and slams it onto the mat a few times. A spear puts Logan down on the floor and Charlotte suplexes her into the barricade. Charlotte sends Logan into the post, puts the robe on, and leaves. No match as the bell never rang.

Erick Rowan, Randy Orton, Rey Mysterio and Ricochet are official for the Rumble.

Drew McIntyre vs. No Way Jose

Jose starts fast but gets kicked in the ribs for his efforts. An overhead belly to belly sends Jose flying but Drew heads outside to beat up the Conga Line. Back in and the Future Shock sets up the Claymore to finish Jose at 1:45.

Post match McIntyre asks if the fans want to see another Claymore. Drew throws Jose back in and kicks his head off a second time. It’s interesting that Drew has never had a World Title shot, so he’s in the Rumble as well.

Shelton Benjamin vs. Aleister Black

Black grabs a rollup for an early two before having a seat to mess with Benjamin’s mind. What looked like a Rings of Saturn attempt is countered into a deadlift to put Black down. Some forearms have Black rocked but he’s right back with Black Mass for the pin at 1:58.

Post match Buddy Murphy jumps Black and sends him into the post. Murphy tosses Black into the timekeeper’s area and hits the running knee to the face. A chair is put under Black’s face and it’s a knee to smash the chair into Black. Murphy sits on the barricade as medics come out.

Seth Rollins/AOP vs. Samoa Joe/Kevin Owens/???

Rollins is officially dubbed the Monday Night Messiah and says he knows what is best for everyone. The mystery partner is….the Big Show, who hasn’t wrestled in over a year due to hip surgery. Show cleans house to start and hits a big chop on Rollins to send us to a break. Back with Rollins still in trouble as Owens hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Rezar gets in a cheap shot though and sends Owens into the barricade, as the fans want Big Show.

Back in and we hit the neck crank on Owens to slow things down so Show starts playing cheerleader (the veterans are always good at that). The side slam/middle rope stomp combination gets two on Owens and it’s off to Rollins for a chinlock of his own. Owens fights up and hits an enziguri on Akam, so Rezar comes in to knock Joe off the apron. That earns him a superkick from Owens and the hot tag brings Show back in. Joe gets sent into the steps, leaving Show to pull Rollins out of the air. The double chokeslam to AOP is broken up with a chair shot from Rollins for the DQ at 10:15.

Rating: C-. I know the fans were chanting for him a bit during the match, but Big Show? I don’t think he’s going to be a big feature attraction but I don’t exactly see this as being the impactful move that WWE thinks it might be. It has been a long time and I was surprised to hear that music again, though the excitement died down in a hurry as you knew the DQ or countout was coming. It’s a nice surprise in the short term but long term, they’re going to need something else.

Post match the beatdown is on but Show punches Rollins out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There was more of an effort this week and that was noticeable all night long. It’s clear to tell when they are trying and when they aren’t and it was the former this week. I’m glad to see that as we are getting close to the Royal Rumble, though it would be nice to see it take place more often than just this time of year. Anyway, good wrestling tonight but some of the angles weren’t that thrilling. There’s a good chance I’ll be at the show next week and I really hope I don’t regret the decision (again).

Results

Andrade b. Rey Mysterio – Hammerlock DDT

Viking Raiders b. OC and Street Profits – Frog splash to Anderson

Erick Rowan b. KJ Orso – Iron Claw

AJ Styles b. Akira Tozawa – RKO

Drew McIntyre b. No Way Jose – Claymore

Aleister Black b. Shelton Benjamin – Black Mass

Big Show/Samoa Joe/Kevin Owens b. Seth Rollins/AOP via DQ when Rollins used a chair

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – August 4, 2005: The Evil Accessory

Smackdown
Date: August 4, 2005
Location: Harbor Yard Arena, Bridgeport, Connecticut
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re two and a half weeks away from Summerslam and things are starting to come together. Last week saw Eddie Guerrero go WAY over the line by telling Rey Mysterio and his son Dominick that Eddie was Dominick’s real father, though he’s not done with his stories. Other than that we’re building towards JBL vs. Batista for the World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Eddie/Rey situation from last week. Eddie’s “I LIED” was great.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Rey Mysterio to be the first ever guest on the debut edition of the Peep Show. Christian thinks the appropriate question is who’s your daddy and recaps last week until Rey cuts him off. Rey is here because he wants to fight Eddie right now but Eddie comes up on screen. He has the Eddie’s Bedtime Stories book, plus reading glasses to complete the evil look.

Eddie shows off the new I’M YOUR PAPI shirt and thinks it’s time for Chapter Two. Rey tries to cut him off but Eddie, again being the smartest person on the show, just reads over him. Actually hold on as Eddie changes his mind and decides to finish this later. He’ll finish it by the end of the show. Christian jumps Mysterio from behind and lays him out with the Unprettier.

Jillian Hall explains how much the blemish on her face has hurt her soul. We get a closeup look at it and she asks if it’s oozing. She wants people to look her in the eyes because she has a purpose. Her name is Jillian Hall and she is MNM’s fixer. She walks over to Sharmell and Booker T. (good thing they were standing there) and walks on by, with Booker wanting to make sure he didn’t just see that.

MNM vs. Booker T./Chris Benoit

Booker and Nitro start things off, thankfully cutting off Tazz hammering home the fact that Jillian has a big growth on her face. Nitro’s headlock doesn’t work very well as Booker clotheslines him down for two. Benoit comes in for two off a snap suplex but it’s quickly off to Mercury, who gets chopped down as well. It’s way too early for the Sharpshooter though as Nitro pulls Mercury outside as we take a break.

Back with Booker kicking Nitro in the face for two and a neckbreaker is good for the same. Everything breaks down and Benoit gets to snap off the release German suplexes. A Melina distraction lets Mercury break up a belly to back superplex though and Benoit is in trouble for the first time. Well it’s better than more talking about the blemish, because you might not have gotten the idea just yet.

A running knee in the corner keeps Benoit in trouble and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up with another German suplex and an enziguri is enough for the hot tag to Booker. The Book End gets two on Nitro with Mercury making the save so Benoit Crossfaces Nitro on the floor as well. Melina breaks up the ax kick so Sharmell starts the catfight, only to have Jillian spear her down. The distraction lets Mercury grab a rollup with ropes for the pin.

Rating: C. The Jillian discussions from Tazz sound like they’re written by a ten year old and they’re getting even worse. It’s a joke that might work once but they’re beating it so far into the ground that it loses whatever impact it might have. MNM getting the next title shot (not official but more than likely) makes the most sense as it’s not like there is a division to speak of at the moment.

Raw Rebound.

Long makes Christian vs. Mysterio for the main event.

We look back at Randy Orton costing Undertaker the #1 contendership last week.

Orton promises to make his intentions clear tonight.

Here’s Long to introduce the contract signing for the World Title match. Batista and JBL come out with the latter saying he’s going to get the title back because he’s the wrestling god. Batista says that’s a wrestling fraud, because JBL keeps taking the easy way out. Long gets them both to sit down for the signing with Batista signing in a hurry. JBL laughs at him for signing without filling in a stipulation. Batista says pick what you want so JBL throws out a bunch of goofy ones before picking No Holds Barred. JBL signs and the match is set.

Animal gives Heidenreich face painting permission.

Summerslam rundown.

Animal/Heidenreich vs. Josh Daniels/Damien Adams

Non-title and Heidenreich now has face paint. Adams’ chops have no effect so it’s the swinging Boss Man Slam and the Doomsday Device for the easy pin.

Here’s Randy Orton for his big explanation. Wrestlemania was supposed to be his night when he beat the Undertaker and killed the ultimate legend. Then fate intervened and stopped him, but last week fate intervened again to stop Undertaker from becoming #1 contender. Now, Orton needs to beat the Undertaker because the Undertaker is a legend in WWE.

Undertaker took away his chance at immortality at Wrestlemania so Orton will take away everything he can from Undertaker, including his chance to be World Champion. Orton’s legacy was formed by every veteran that he dropped with an RKO and by becoming the youngest World Champion last year at Summerslam. Therefore, at this year’s Summerslam, he’ll get what he needs when he beats Undertaker. Orton demands an answer right now and then panics when the gong strikes (that never gets old). Undertaker’s voice comes on and says Orton will rest in peace at Summerslam, with RIP appearing on the Titantron.

The Boogeyman is still coming.

An unidentified woman with an envelope arrives to see Eddie. We get some flirting and Eddie promises things will get hotter in the arena.

Christian vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey slugs away to start and hits the slingshot dive to the floor. They get inside for the opening bell and Christian sends him hard into the corner to take over. Rey is back with a kick to the face and some right hands as he’s being more brawlerish here. The springboard seated senton gets two as Eddie and the woman come to the stage.

Back from a break with Christian hammering away and then choking on the ropes. A fireman’s carry gutbuster gets two on Rey and we hit the abdominal stretch. Christian drops some headbutts to the ribs for a change of pace and it’s off to a waistlock. Rey gets dropped ribs first across the top rope and a knee puts him on the floor, much to Eddie’s delight.

A quick throat snap across the top gives Rey a breather but Christian dropkicks him out of the air to put him right back down. Now it’s the seated abdominal stretch as you can’t question Christian’s focus. Christian keeps mixing things up (well done) with a bearhug but Rey slips out and snaps off a hurricanrana for two. We take a break and come back with Rey hitting a DDT for a delayed two more. Rey is right back up with the 619 into Dropping The Dime for the surprise pin.

Rating: C. The back work went on for a good while but it wasn’t bad or anything. Rey’s comeback seemed to mainly take place during the break so it was a little lackluster, but Rey can get sympathy like few others in history. Christian continues to be stuck in the blocks on Smackdown, even though he still feels like a star ready to break out.

Post match Rey wants Eddie to come to the ring but Eddie calls that rude. Instead he introduces the woman as Anna, and asks her to take the Bedtime Stories book to Rey. Either Rey can read Chapter Two or Eddie will do it for him. Rey can’t do it so Eddie says Chapter Two is custody papers.

A court has said that Dominick belongs to Eddie so next week, Rey is bringing him to Eddie. Or maybe not if Rey is nice enough about it though. Rey talks about how he and his wife have raised Dominick and the first word Dominick said was dad. He taught Dominick to ride a bicycle and he took Dominick to the hospital when he broke his arm. They were going to tell Dominick the truth about Eddie but Eddie had to do everything on his own and ruin Dominick’s life.

Rey asks Eddie man to man to not hurt Dominick any more. He even drops to a knee but Eddie says that Anna is his attorney. She just reminded Eddie that Eddie is the real father and he’d never lie to his kids. Dominick is the son that Eddie has longed for and he’ll carry out the Guerrero legacy. Next week, Dominick is Eddie’s son so all Rey has to do is stay tuned for Chapter Three: Dominick Comes Home To His Papi. Cole doesn’t seem all that upset or stunned to end the show. This was rather long, but it’s now getting into that ridiculous territory and that’s a strange place to be given the material of the whole thing.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling was mostly fine here, but some of the angles didn’t do much for me. The Eddie vs. Rey stuff continues, but it’s getting to the point of uncomfortable and there is a good chance that we’re going to get into ridiculous. Orton vs. Undertaker II should be good and JBL vs. Batista….well someone has to fight for the title. Summerslam is going to need someone to step up big because I’m not sure if Hogan vs. Michaels is going to be able to carry it. Maybe they’ll surprise us, but they are going to have their work cut out for them.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Smackdown – January 3, 2020: Many Happy Returns

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: January 3, 2020
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves

It’s the first Smackdown of the new year and we are on the road to the Royal Rumble. That could mean a lot of things but one of them is likely to be more build towards Daniel Bryan vs. the Fiend II. I’m curious to see where things go, though King Corbin and Dolph Ziggler are in the main event to temper my interest. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Bryan becoming #1 contender last week.

Miz comes up to Bryan and tells him to defeat the Fiend for everyone.

Opening sequence.

Here are Bayley and Sasha Banks for a chat. Bayley talks about everyone working on their new year’s resolution and the two of them are no different. Look at them now: Bayley is Women’s Champion and Sasha is the standard bearer. Then you have someone like Lacey Evans…and here is Lacey, plus Dana Brooke, who will be facing Bayley and Sasha. Lacey doesn’t like Bayley talking about her daughter when Lacey has worked to give her family a better life. This brings out Alexa Bliss and Nikki Cross for the (scheduled) triple threat.

Sasha Banks/Bayley vs. Lacey Evans/Dana Brooke vs. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross

Banks messes with Lacey’s mind to start before bringing Nikki in instead. That means Brooke gets to come in for one off a slam and everything breaks down for a bit. Lacey is sent outside and Bliss dropkicks Banks. Bayley pulls Bliss off the ropes though and the Meteora in the corner gives Banks two. Banks chokes her a bit but everything breaks down again and they wind up on the floor as we take a break.

Back with Brooke cleaning house, including a snap suplex for two on Banks. Everything breaks down again until it’s Bayley stomping on Brooke some more. Brooke fights out of the corner so Banks knees her in the face to set up Bayley’s belly to back suplex for two. An enziguri finally gets Brooke out of trouble and it’s back to Lacey for the standing moonsault on Bayley.

The slingshot Bronco Buster looks to set up the springboard moonsault but Banks pulls Bayley away. That’s only good for two as everyone makes the save so Lacey has to slip out of a double powerbomb. The Woman’s Right hits Banks and Dana adds the Swanton (with a thud) for the pin at 13:17.

Rating: D+. This was a near mess with the match just going and going until someone got the fall. The match didn’t have much of a flow or structure to it and Dana getting the win was rather surprising. In theory this gives Dana and Lacey a Tag Team Title shot but Lacey seems in line to face Bayley so it could be some combination of both.

We recap Dolph Ziggler crushing Otis’ fruitcake.

Mandy Rose comes up to Otis, who didn’t see the fruitcake get destroyed. His mama did though and she’s not happy. Tucker comes up to say they have a match so the two of them leave, with Mandy actually looking sad.

Miz runs into New Day but isn’t in the mood to celebrate the new year. Big E.: “I watched the balls drop.” Kofi: “There’s only one ball. What were you watching?” Big E: “I don’t know!” Kofi tries to make Miz feel better by saying Miz won the most titles in the 2010s, though Big E. points out that Miz was tied with Kofi himself. That’s not enough for Miz, because Fiend violated his family’s home. The pancakes are turned over and a match seems to be made for later.

Here’s Elias for a song. This one is about how many things need to change in 2020, like Shane McMahon going to Raw and Revival being harder to watch than Dolph Ziggler’s comedy act. He also implies that he’ll be in the Royal Rumble.

We look at Revival getting beaten up in the Miracle on 34th Street Fight.

Revival doesn’t like being made to look like bad jokes. They want respect in the new year but here’s Chad Gable to say embrace who you are. Revival makes fun of Gable for being short, but Gable says they don’t bother him anymore. His new motto is Rise Over Size (egads) and the result is Dash vs. Gable tonight.

Shorty G. vs. Dash Wilder

Scott Dawson is on commentary for more short jokes as Wilder gets two off a suplex. Gable is back with a high crossbody for two before grabbing the ankle lock. That’s reversed into a rollup for two, with Cole calling Gable inspirational. Dawson: “He’s inspirational because he’s short???” Another ankle lock makes Wilder tap at 2:52.

Post match Dawson comes in for the beatdown and the Shatter Machine connects. Sheamus makes his return for the save…and then Brogue Kicks Gable.

Kofi Kingston vs. The Miz

Kofi sweeps the leg and hits a quick splash for two, setting up the monkey flip to frustrate Miz even more. A back elbow to the jaw drops Miz again and it’s time for a breather on the floor. Back in and Miz kicks away at the ribs in the corner, setting up a running knee for a bonus. Miz charges into a kick to the head though and Kofi adds a top rope chop to the head. Miz’s reverse DDT is blocked but so is the SOS. The Skull Crushing Finale doesn’t work either and Kofi rolls him up for the pin at 3:54.

Rating: C-. These two are always good for a passable enough match and it seems Miz is a heel all over again. To be fair that fits him better, as it’s pretty hard to cheer for him when he failed against Wyatt at the pay per view. Just let him be a heel again because neither face run has worked for the most part.

Post match Miz jumps Kofi to end the face experiment again. Miz shouts that he’s given the fans everything.

Daniel Bryan says he’s winning the title at the Rumble, so Roman Reigns enters the Rumble. That would make Bryan vs. Reigns at Wrestlemania so Bryan says bring it on. They’re ready for their tag match tonight.

Post break Cathy Kelly knocks on Miz’s door but John Morrison answers, saying Miz has nothing left to say tonight.

Otis vs. Drew Gulak

Before the match, Gulak says that he is an expert in matters of the heart, which means he knows Mandy would never date Otis. We have a POWER POINT PRESENTATION but Otis jumps him to start in a hurry. A suplex sends Gulak flying and another drops him in a hurry. There’s a gorilla press but hang on as Dolph Ziggler is hitting on Mandy in the back. Otis throws Gulak down and hits the Caterpillar, setting up a Vader Bomb for the pin at 2:27.

Braun Strowman vs. Cesaro

Cesaro has Sami Zayn and Shinsuke Nakamura with him. They do the power lockup to start with Cesaro getting launched into the corner. Strowman cleans house and chases the other two off of the apron as we take a break. Back with Cesaro diving into a choke but reversing into a quick sleeper.

That’s broken up in a hurry so Cesaro hits a running uppercut in the corner. Another misses though and Strowman heads to the floor for the train of shoulders. Sami comes in for a distraction so Cesaro can send Braun into the post. The Neuralizer is countered into the running powerslam to finish Cesaro at 8:12.

Rating: D+. Just a match here with the break eating up a good chunk of it. Strowman is pretty obviously getting the Intercontinental Title shot at the Rumble and he might as well win the thing. It’s not like it matters who wins it at this point so trading it to someone more popular might be an improvement over what we have at the moment.

Post match Nakamura hits Strowman with Kinshasa so the trio can leave.

We recap Roman Reigns attacking King Corbin last week.

Roman Reigns/Daniel Bryan vs. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler

Corbin jumps Reigns at the bell and gets punched in the face for his efforts. It’s off to Ziggler, whose neckbreaker is easily broken up so Reigns can hit a big boot. Bryan comes in and kicks away….but we have the Fiend laughing and lights flickering. Back from a break with Reigns kicking Corbin in the face but running into Deep Six for two. Corbin sends him into the steps and Ziggler begs Reigns to do something.

The Superman Punch finally gets Reigns out of trouble and it’s back to Bryan to pick up the pace. Bryan elbows Ziggler down and hits the YES Kicks, only to miss the big one. Ziggler’s rollup is reversed into the LeBell Lock with Corbin making the save. Reigns spears Corbin and Bryan knees Ziggler….as the lights go out. The Fiend is here so Bryan hits him with a suicide dive.

Fiend gets posted but is right back with the Mandible Claw to send Bryan through the barricade. The Claw goes on again and there go the lights, meaning the Fiend is gone. Ziggler and Corbin jump Reigns as he goes to check on Bryan, meaning it’s time for the handcuffs and dog food. Cue the returning Usos for the save though, which is pretty long overdue. We’ll say the match ended at about 10:00.

Rating: C-. This was all just a means to get to the end of the match and that’s fine as it didn’t exactly overstay its welcome. That being said, this didn’t help hide the fact that Ziggler and Corbin aren’t exactly as interesting as a lot of the other people on the show, including the three other people involved in the match. Not a bad match or anything, but a means to an end more than anything on its own.

Overall Rating: C. While the wrestling wasn’t great, this show felt like it had stuff happening. There were four returns (only one of which we knew was coming) and you can see where the stories are going. Compare that to Raw where it feels like the stories either have no direction or are having twists thrown into them to keep things going. This may not be the most thrilling show, but it’s a structured show and doesn’t leave you wondering what you just watched. Unfortunately it doesn’t leave you overly entertained, but I’ll take that over Raw almost every day.

Results

Lacey Evans/Dana Brooke b. Alexa Bliss/Nikki Cross and Sasha Banks/Bayley – Swanton to Banks

Shorty G. b. Dash Wilder – Ankle lock

Kofi Kingston b. The Miz – Rollup

Otis b. Drew Gulak – Vader Bomb

Daniel Bryan/Roman Reigns b. Dolph Ziggler/King Corbin via DQ when the Fiend interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Main Event – December 26, 2019: Keep It This Way

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: December 26, 2019
Host: Scott Sanford

It’s going to be another week of just recaps here as this week’s Monday Night Raw was taped in advance. That being said, it’s not like anyone was paying attention to the television shows in the previous few days anyway. I’m not sure how well this is going to go but you never can tell with what they’re going for with this show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Bray Wyatt beating Miz at TLC after shrugging off everything Miz threw at him. This switches into short haired Daniel Bryan returning to attack Bray, setting up a likely title match at the Royal Rumble.

Opening sequence.

From Smackdown.

Here’s Bryan for an opening chat. Bryan talks about how he looked in the mirror after Bray’s attack on him a few weeks ago. His hair and beard were gone, but what he saw was the lack of the Daniel Bryan brand. Then he went home and when his daughter saw him without his hair and beard for the first time ever, she cried. Bryan sees something new in his face. He doesn’t see the man who main evented Wrestlemania, but rather the man who worked for years to get here. Bryan wants Wyatt out here right now but here’s the Miz instead.

Miz talks about how what happened to Bryan was terrible, but Wyatt attacked him personally. Bryan doesn’t know what it’s like to have his home violated so Miz wants revenge. He’ll be taking what Wyatt treasures most when he takes the Universal Title. Cue King Corbin to mock them for being bad fathers before playing a loop of the announcement that he won on Sunday.

Corbin says he’s next in line for Wyatt because the two of them have failed as wrestlers and fathers. The fight is almost on but here’s Dolph Ziggler from behind for the beatdown so Corbin can stand tall. So yeah Bryan is back and everything, but it’s Corbin and Ziggler to open things up again. I know you’ll hear this thrown around a lot, but this felt like WWE just trolled us by bringing out Corbin and Ziggler in another opening segment.

From Smackdown.

Cesaro/Shinsuke Nakamura vs. New Day

Non-title and Cesaro’s entrance now looks like the Matrix. Kofi dropkicks Nakamura down for an early one so it’s off to Big E. to run Nakamura over as well. A spinning kick to the head drops Big E., so he’s right back with the Rock Bottom out of the corner. Cesaro makes the save so Kofi hits a big flip dive to take Cesaro down outside. A running clothesline drops Big E. though and Nakamura adds in a knee to the head.

Big E. gets sent into the steps and we take a break. Back with Nakamura kicking Big E. down but Kinshasa is blocked with a heck of a clothesline. The hot tag brings in Kofi to clean some house, only to get caught with Swiss Death. The Cesaro Swing gets two but the Neutralizer is broken up. A rather sloppy small package finishes Cesaro at 12:02.

Rating: C-. Pretty paint by numbers match which felt like it could have been on any house show. To be fair though, it’s not like they are going to do anything significant on this show and the champs won. Cesaro taking falls isn’t even worth getting annoyed over anymore either and that’s a sad reality….which we’ve been in for years now.

Post match the beatdown is on but Braun Strowman makes the save and hits the running shoulders around the ring.

Video on the Seth Rollins/AOP vs. Kevin Owens.

From Raw.

Mojo Rawley vs. Kevin Owens

Owens runs him over to start and throws in a bunch of chairs. Back in and Mojo manages a fireman’s carry faceplant onto said chairs for two. The chairs are set up next to each other and Mojo actually slams him onto them for two more. Since being slammed onto opened chairs doesn’t really hurt, Owens hits a superkick into the Swanton for two of his own. A table is brought in and it’s a Stunner into the Pop Up Powerbomb through the table to finish Rawley at 6:30.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure what to think about this one. They were smart to keep it short because no one was going to buy Mojo as a threat to Owens, but it wasn’t interesting in the first place and the match was just an annoyance for Owens. The No DQ part was just a detail and a way to increase the violence, but it never got interesting or really close to it.

Post match, Owens calls out Rollins and the AOP for a fight. Post break here are Rollins and AOP with Rollins saying a lot of things without having a microphone. He offers a handshake but Owens superkicks him down. That means a beatdown from the AOP though and Rollins is back up for the Stomp. This sends Samoa Joe into a rant about how those aren’t men because they’re just thugs. Someone needs to strike first so you can tell one story.

From Smackdown.

Daniel Bryan/The Miz vs. King Corbin/Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler gets in trouble early and it’s the stereo YES Kicks to both villains. Bryan hits some YES chants and we take a break. Back with Bryan hitting the running corner dropkicks on Corbin but the Deep Six plants Bryan. Ziggler’s big elbow gets two and it’s back to the corner to keep up the beating. The trash talk is on and Ziggler hammers away in the corner.

Corbin hits a running clothesline but takes too long bragging, allowing Bryan to hit the missile dropkick. Miz comes in for a bunch of kicks to both and a rollup for two on Ziggler. The Skull Crushing Finale hits Corbin but Ziggler’s superkick is good for two. Another superkick is countered into the Figure Four though and, with Bryan taking out Corbin, Ziggler taps at 10:21.

Rating: C-. This had a little more energy than the other tag match but I’m not exactly buying Miz as a threat to anyone after he got beaten just five days ago. Corbin and Ziggler continue to be little more than villains who just happen to be here and I don’t see that changing. I mean, Ziggler does wear a hat now so he’s changing a little right?

The lights flicker and the Fiend’s laugh end the show, though we do get an announcement for next week: Miz vs. Bryan vs. Corbin in a #1 contenders match for the Rumble title shot.

Video on Randy Orton vs. AJ Styles.

From Raw.

Randy Orton/Viking Raiders vs. OC

Fallout from last week’s main event. Ivar shoves Anderson into the corner to start and it’s off to Erik for a slam of his own. An Ivar knee gets two on Anderson and Erik slams Ivar onto him for two. Gallows comes in for a change of pace and kicks Erik in the head to put him on the floor. AJ gets in a cheap shot and it’s Erik in trouble for a change. The jumping knee gives AJ two and it’s Anderson grabbing the chinlock.

This one doesn’t last long though as Anderson goes with the spinebuster for two instead. Erik gets in a forearm to AJ though and the hot tag brings in Orton. Gallows doesn’t waste time in backdropping him to the floor though and Orton’s already banged up knee is hurt again. The big staredown on the floor takes us to a break and we come back with Gallows working on the knee some more.

Orton fights up and brings Erik back in for the tag so house can be cleaned. Ivar is in rather quickly for a side slam and basement crossbody. Erik drives Ivar into Anderson in the corner and the Viking Experience gets two with Gallows making a save. Orton comes back in off a blind tag as AJ sends the Vikings outside. The RKO is broken up so Anderson takes one instead. Gallows goes after the knee though and it’s the Phenomenal Forearm to put Orton away at 14:01.

Rating: C. This was a bit boring but it tied into last week and gives us a reason to see both matches again. I could go for more AJ vs. Orton as their match last week wasn’t too bad but the Vikings vs. the OC isn’t exactly thrilling. As long as the AOP is walking around, it’s hard to buy anyone else as a major threat to the titles. At least we had something to fill in some time here though, which was part of the point.

And from Raw again to wrap it up.

US Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Seth Rollins

Mysterio is defending and Rollins has the AOP. Side note: Rollins no longer has BEASTSLAYER on his Titantron (not sure how long it has been gone but it was there the night after Survivor Series). Good, as that had nothing to do with what he is doing at the moment and involved one feud that hasn’t been active since August. Rollins starts fast but Rey slips out of a suplex attempt. A discus forearm knocks Rey silly so he’s right back with a headscissors.

The 619 misses though and Rey is sent shoulder first into the post. He’s also thrown hard to the floor as we take a break. Back with Rey fighting out of an armbar and sending Rollins outside. That means a sliding sunset bomb into the barricade, setting up the springboard seated senton. A tornado DDT gives Rey two but Rollins scores with the buckle bomb and a low superkick for his own two. The Stomp misses though and Rey hits the 619, only to have the AOP interfere for the DQ at 9:53.

Rating: C+. This was the kind of action that you would expect from these two but the ending saves the big match for another date. It might be an annoying way to end the show but that was the right way to go here. Mysterio can fight Rollins another day, perhaps when he has some more backup. I could go for more and that’s what they were trying to get the fans to want.

Post match the beatdown is on and they go to the announcers’ table. Joe stays in his seat though and doesn’t like being told to move. If he gets up, it isn’t going to be to move. Joe gets up so Rollins gets in his face, meaning the jacket comes off. Rollins walks away but tells the AOP to finish him. The beatdown is on and Joe gets taken out as Rollins Stomps Rey. The AOP puts Joe through the table to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. As tends to be the case, this show did little more than remind me of how uninteresting a lot of what WWE is doing at the moment really is. It’s not terrible but it’s just there, and I need more than that to keep my interest from week to week. That being said, it’s still better than having the same nothing matches over and over again so they’re going in the right direction here, even if it isn’t going to last.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




Monday Night Raw – August 1, 2005: Who, Who And WHY???

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 1, 2005
Location: Mohegan Sun Arena, Uncasville, Connecticut
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Jonathan Coachman

We’re less than three weeks away from Summerslam and this week has a big title rematch. Last week Chris Jericho helped Carlito defeat John Cena to earn the title match this week, even though it’s pretty clear that we’re coming up on Cena defending against Jericho. Other than that, we have more on the Shawn Michaels vs. Hulk Hogan build. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here’s Chris Jericho to get things going. He and Eric Bischoff have been working on a BRILLIANT plan to get the WWE Championship off of John Cena. First of all, we saw Cena’s exposure as a fake rapper and then as a fake champion after Carlito beat Cena with a completely fair referee. After a quick clip of Carlito winning thanks to a low blow, Jericho gets serious to promise Cena some pain at Summerslam. Cue a charging Cena and the fight is on, with Bischoff sending security out a few seconds later. With the fight broken up, Bischoff makes Jericho guest referee for Carlito’s title shot. Cena looks crushed, as expected.

Big Show/Shelton Benjamin vs. Snitsky/Chris Masters

Fallout from last week. It’s a brawl before the bell with Show throwing Shelton inside and pulling Snitsky outside. We settle down to Shelton shouldering Masters and bringing in Show for some headbutting. The huge chop lets Show mock Snitsky’s pain but Masters’ attempt at a cheap shot completely fails. Show tosses him over the top for the big crash onto Snitsky and we take a break.

Back with Shelton hammering on Snitsky some more but having to deal with Masters again, allowing Snitsky to block the Stinger Splash. Masters hits some backbreakers for two, followed by the bearhug. A powerslam gives Masters two and it’s back to Snitsky for the chinlock. Shelton finally gets two off a rollup to Masters but a backslide is countered with a heck of a clothesline. Back up and Shelton finally gets in a neckbreaker for a breather, allowing the hot tag to Big Show. House is cleaned with splashes and running shoulders but Snitsky kicks Show in the face. Not that it matters as Show chokeslams him for the pin.

Rating: D. This was VERY long and dull but I’ll take whatever gets Shelton going again. I don’t expect it to last at the moment, but at least he finally got something back. I don’t know what kind of a future Masters and Snitsky have, though it’s not like there is anyone else doing anything at the moment in the tag division (including the champions).

Here’s Eugene, now with Christy Hemme as his literal cheerleader, for the Eugene Invitational. The hometown hero is….Kurt Angle, with Eugene demanding to know where his name is and where he is from. Angle gets so annoyed that he admits he isn’t from Connecticut so there’s no match. Sure Eugene said he was from Cleveland last week but that was pretending and this is real! Angle brings up that this is an Indian casino and asks who could really be from here. And now, for your random cameo of the week.

Eugene vs. Tatanka

Eugene is rather pleased that Tatanka can drive him back into the corner so Tatanka shoulders him down for two. They fight over the arm with a minute gone and Lawler talking about Christy’s pom poms. A chop puts Eugene down and Tatanka tries the warpath to a non-existent reaction. The top rope chop to the head gets two on Eugene with just under a minute left. Eugene hits an Angle Slam and pulls down the non-existent straps. The ankle lock goes on and Angle comes in for the DQ. Tatanka can’t take a loss here? Really?

Post match Eugene and Tatanka clear the ring. That’s a bad tag team at a legends of wrestling event if I’ve ever seen one.

Post break a furious Angle promises to get his medal back next week in Pittsburgh. Next week, he’s making Eugene REALLY special.

We look at Kane losing the stretcher match and kidnapping Lita to blow off some steam.

Carlito and Jericho rant about Cena and nearly come to blows. Bischoff comes in to calm things down, saying Jericho’s job is to make Carlito WWE Champion. Now go come up with a plan. Jericho thinks a fast count is in order.

Vince McMahon arrives.

Here’s Vince in the ring for a major announcement. This is the 636th episode of Raw, putting the show past all other original shows for total episodes. The classy thing to do would be to thank the fans, but Vince thanks himself instead. He has a history of making good business decisions, like bringing back people or concepts that make him money. That’s what he’s doing again tonight as he brings back a former WWE superstar. This man has been wrecking havoc backstage and now he will be facing Edge at Summerslam: MATT HARDY.

We see Matt walking through the back before hitting the arena for a big reaction. Matt says he should thank Vince but it was the people who brought him back to Raw. Unlike Vince, Matt is willing to thank the fans for getting him back here. Matt recaps the entire love triangle with Edge and Lita, including real names and breaking kayfabe by talking about how the marriage to Kane was just on TV.

The story came out and the fans let Edge and Lita know how they felt. Then he heard 20,000 people chanting WE WANT MATT in Madison Square Garden so now Matt is back to destroy Edge’s life. Matt promises to hurt Edge at Summerslam and he WILL NOT DIE. It’s a big moment, but after Matt popped up a few times, it was hardly some game changer.

Vince is in the back and runs into Kerwin White, but he’s been rich for so long that he’s forgotten what it’s like to be middle class. Vince leaves and Kerwin longs for some polo.

Rob Conway vs. Val Venis

Conway debuts his “Just Look At Me” song and wrestles in sunglasses because he’s now something like Buff Bagwell. From now on, he’s doing things the Con-Way. JR is incredulous over the sunglasses as Conway starts with a headlock. Venis runs him over and the glasses fall off, sending Conway over the edge. Conway is so mad that he gets wristlocked and hammerlocked, though he does get in an elbow to the jaw. An exchange of forearms on the floor doesn’t last long but Conway snaps him throat first across the rope.

The beating against the barricade keeps Val down and it’s time to crank on the neck back inside. Venis spins out into a Blue Thunder Bomb as the announcers make porn jokes about Venis to fill in some time. A reverse Figure Four sends Conway over to the ropes as we get a loud THIS MATCH SUCKS chant. I’d go more with it’s not that interesting but it doesn’t suck. The Money Shot is broken up and a hanging swinging neckbreaker (the Ego Trip) finishes Venis.

Rating: D. Conway feels like someone who belongs in another era, as you could see him being a star in something closer to the territory days. On Raw in 2005 though? This really didn’t click, though part of that is due to the match being Conway vs. Venis. Who is going to look at this and see something they might want to watch? Conway could be fine in the midcard, but don’t expect to see me care about him with a heel character that isn’t exactly groundbreaking.

And now, Shawn Michaels imitates Hulk Hogan on a fake Larry King Show, getting in every old joke that he can think of and talking about how different he is outside of the ring. With about five BROTHER’s per sentence, Shawn takes a call from Battle Creek, Michigan, where he’ll never go again because Hulk only makes the big towns brother. We get a long and good Shawn highlight video, capped off by the superkick to Hogan.

Shawn, in Hogan pose: “…..brother….”. Before the match, “Hulk” has a lot of politicking to do with Vince. We hear about how Shawn failed when Hogan bailed on the company for more money because Shawn would rather work as hard in Battle Creek, Michigan than he would in Madison Square Garden. It won’t matter though because (“You know something Mean Gene!” Larry: “It’s Larry King!” Hulk: “It doesn’t matter brother. I’m selling tickets!”) he’ll prove himself at Summerslam.

Hulk gets a bad cramp but he’s fine enough to superkick Larry and rip off the wig. Hogan has a reality show, but at Summerslam, reality is kicking him in the face, just like Shawn kicks the camera. Shawn is great at this stuff and even though it’s pretty easy to mock Hogan, you can tell Shawn is in this one hard. That being said, you can imagine how Hogan is going to take this because he’s a little serious about himself. Shawn at least feels like he’s saying something though and it’s coming across even with the comedy stuff. That’s more than Hogan has done, as he’s just promised to beat Shawn up. More of Shawn’s stuff please.

It’s Diva Search time and Summer is cut. Yes another good looking blonde is out, leaving the rest to try Queen of the Mountain (the duel with big sticks). Hold on though as here’s Rob Schneider of all people to promote Deuce Bigelow: European Gigolo. Schneider: “As you battle, do not be distracted by my boner.” The four do their tournament, Schneider isn’t funny, Schneider gets physical on the big inflatable mat, Elizabeth wins. So much for them not spending as much time on this stuff.

We recap Carlito vs. Cena from last week.

Raw World Title: Carlito vs. John Cena

Bischoff is at ringside, Cena is defending, Carlito’s Intercontinental Title isn’t on the line and Jericho is guest referee. Jericho gets in a distraction to start so Carlito can hammer away at the bell. Cena’s early comeback is cut off by Jericho and a crazy fast count gets two. Jericho helps Carlito send him shoulder first into the post and we take a break. Back with Carlito hitting a running neckbreaker for a fast two and the handicap match continues.

Cena tries a suplex but Jericho breaks it up so Carlito can hit a DDT for two, despite Cena being all over the ropes. A flying shoulder drops Carlito and Cena spears Jericho, only to get taken down from behind again. We hit the chinlock again but Cena powers out, meaning it’s time for another cheap shot from Jericho.

They head outside with Jericho pulling the pad off of the barricade. Even Jericho gets in a ram but Cena comes back with the shots to the face. The usual looks to finish but Jericho won’t count, meaning Cena goes after him again. Jericho breaks up the FU, only to hit Bischoff by mistake. Cena clotheslines Jericho to the floor and hits the FU to get the retaining pin from another referee.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure what to think about this one. They didn’t waste time hiding what they were doing here but there was no chance that they were going to change the title with a Summerslam main event ready for them. The idea is there, but was there NO ONE but the Intercontinental Champion for this spot? Throw Snitsky in there or something but find a better way to protect the title.

Post match Jericho hits Cena low and busts him open with a TV camera. The Walls go on and Bischoff slaps Cena a few times, sending JR over the edge to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Matt coming back was cool (yet it would have been better had he just gotten into the fight with Edge some other way), Shawn’s deal was funny and that’s it for your positives on this show. A fifteen minute Masters/Snitsky match? The same main event we had last week? ROB SCHNEIDER AND TATANKA??? They had a few ideas here (Conway is at least a genuine attempt to push someone new and I can go for that) but the bad stuff really cripples anything good the show could have had. It’s not a failure, but they need to get rid of the awful stuff in a hurry because it’s killing what good things they have.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2004 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2019/08/26/new-book-and-e-book-kbs-complete-2004-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6




New Column: Resolving To Be A Better Wrestling Fan

Ok so I might not be the best source on this one.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/kbs-review-resolving-better-wrestling-fan/