IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: September 16, 2004
Location: Spokane Arena, Spokane, Washington
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re coming up on No Mercy and a lot of the card is either already set or pretty clear. Last week saw the return of the Big Show, who you know is going to be treated as a major star. To be fair, when he’s motivated and ready to go, he’s not half bad. The problem is when he’s more than half bad, which happens far too often. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Big Show returning and beating up the lumberjacks last week. That was a good way to showcase his dominance.

Opening sequence.

Torrie Wilson comes out to ring announce for the sake of eye candy.

Booker T. vs. John Cena

Match #4 in the Best of Five series with Booker up 2-1. Booker starts fast with an early rollup for two, followed by a backslide for the same. Cena’s sunset flip and small package get the same, plus a VERY enthusiastic reaction from a fan in the front row. That’s enough to send Booker outside for a breather as we take a break. Back with Booker kicking him in the face for two and grabbing one of the most quickly broken chinlocks I’ve ever seen. Booker is right back with a hard superkick for two and a longer chinlock.

A rollup with feet on the ropes gives Booker two but Cena’s flapjack is enough to actually start the comeback. The big shoulder misses though and Booker nails a spinebuster for two more. An attempt to bring in the belt gets Booker rolled up for two more and the Shuffle is good for the same. The referee gets shoved though and Booker nails him with the belt, as somehow the referee is fine with Cena going from normal to out in half a second. That’s only good for two as well, followed by a quick FU to tie up the series.

Rating: C+. They still have good chemistry together sot he match was easy to watch, though it’s not exactly something that is worth seeing. Cena is getting better and better every day at this point and you can feel his time starting to come. Booker is still a big enough deal to be a threat to him, but I don’t think there’s any hiding the fact that it’s Cena’s title to win soon.

Theodore Long praises Big Show for his return and offers Show a match with either Kurt Angle or Eddie Guerrero at No Mercy. Just please not a triple threat.

Next week: a night of stars as it’s the fifth anniversary of Smackdown! Hulk Hogan! Mick Foley! Stephanie McMahon! Yes Stephanie is listed third here! Vince McMahon! Steve Austin!

Michael Cole brings out Billy Kidman for a chat. Cole talks about Kidman losing his confidence over the botched shooting star press and costing himself and Paul London the Tag Team Titles last week (actually a pretty unique story). Kidman doesn’t like being called a quitter because he walked out on last week’s match to prevent another injury. He’s really just misunderstood because all he wants to do is keep people save. A few weeks ago his knee drove Chavo’s head into the mat and now these bloodthirsty fans want to see him do it again?

This brings out Paul London to say he doesn’t believe Kidman is misunderstood. Kidman walked out on him and cost them the titles because Kidman quit. London hands him the mic but Kidman has nothing to say, earning himself a slap in the face. Kidman walks away without saying anything. I’m liking this story.

Smackdown Flashback Moment: TLC III.

Rob Van Dam/Rey Mysterio vs. Dudley Boyz

D-Von punches Rob into the corner to start but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. It’s off to Mysterio for two off a Lionsault press to D-Von. Bubba comes in and gets punched as well, only to have Spike trip Rey up like a good villainous boss who happens to look 13 years old tends to do.

One heck of a release wheel barrow suplex gives Bubba two so he promises to do it again. Since he’s kind of loud, Rey knows what’s coming and reverses into his layout bulldog instead. That’s enough for the hot tag to Rob, who gets to kick D-Von in the face again. Near heel miscommunication ensues again, allowing Rey to dive onto Bubba. The Five Star finishes D-Von, despite a big bounce that delays the cover.

Rating: C-. I feel like we’ve seen this match a dozen times in recent months. That doesn’t mean it’s a bad one, but it’s something that has been done so many times before that it doesn’t have much of an impact. Spike as the Dudleys’ boss isn’t exactly getting them somewhere, though I can get the idea of trying to freshen the team up a little bit.

Post match Spike yells at both Dudleys, including a low blow to D-Von. Dang D-Von has taken quite the beating tonight.

Cole talks about last week’s situation with Paul Heyman and Heidenreich, so Tazz shows us a clip. Cole won’t apologize.

Eddie comes in to see Big Show and praises him for how awesome last week’s return was. It made him think of the Running of the Bulls, because there was one bull who stood 7’ and weighed 500lbs. Eddie: “That’s a lot of bull.” Show has two contracts, but Eddie wants the fight at No Mercy.

Orlando Jordan and JBL arrive with the champ saying he has to prove he’s not afraid of the Undertaker. That means calling him out again tonight.

Here’s JBL in the arena and I guess tonight meant next. He does not flip flop like so many political figures of today, so Undertaker can get out here RIGHT NOW. Undertaker comes out (thankfully the full sized version this time) and JBL actually sends Jordan to the back to do this one on one. The hat and tie come off and the fight begins, with Undertaker kicking him in the head.

The threat of a chokeslam sends JBL bailing but here are Gangrel and Viscera of all people to jump Undertaker. Viscera hits a chokebomb, which Cole calls a “variation of a double chokeslam into a sitout powerbomb.” Since that’s exactly what the move is, what is it a variation of? The beatdown cuts off Undertaker’s comeback and a pair of splashes keep him laying. JBL poses on Undertaker because he never learns.

Sign up for Tough Enough!

Kenzo Suzuki/Rene Dupree vs. FBI

Non-title and now I’m supposed to cheer for the FBI? Tazz can’t understand why the Japanese Hiroko is walking around the French poodle. Earlier today, Nunzio and Stamboli agreed to stick with the game plan for the match. Dupree shoulders Stamboli to start with little effect. Some power puts Dupree in trouble so it’s off to Nunzio, who gets low bridged to the floor.

As the match goes on, here’s Heidenreich to kidnap Cole from the announcers’ table. With the two of them gone, Dupree hits the French Tickler….and now Tazz goes off to find Cole and Heidenreich. The hot tag brings in Stamboli to take over but Kenzo shoves Nunzio off the top. Dupree’s Michinoku Driver is enough to pin Stamboli. Too much of the match was spent on the announcers’ stuff, but that was more interesting than anything going on in the ring.

Raw Rebound.

And now, the scene where Heidenreich is implied to be raping Michael Cole. We go to the back where Cole is standing face first against a wall with Heidenreich behind him. The look on Cole’s face tells you just about all you need to know here and Heidenreich….uh….I guess the term would be thrusting, which shakes Cole at the same time, pretty much confirms it. Heidenreich says he’s been studying Cole and they “have the same desires.” Heidenreich: “I’m going to give you what you want.”

Heidenreich locks the door, making Cole look even more afraid. He keeps his face next to Cole’s ear and breathes, as this is one of those things where you can’t realistically say it’s anything else. I absolutely do not remember it being this blunt but my goodness man. That’s rather disturbing to see and it’s hard to believe this ever made air.

Luther Reigns comes in to see Big Show. He knows it’s a tough decision, but Show should pick Eddie. See, the WWE needs Angle around and Show already put him on the shelf for several months. The three of them are different and outcasts, because Eddie doesn’t care about Show. Reigns and Angle do though, and Show needs to think about that. They’re really making this out to be a big deal when Show might as well flip a coin.

Match #5 between Cena and Booker will take place at No Mercy. We still have no commentary to talk about this.

Heidenreich now has Cole by the throat and says he’s going to give Cole something he’s wanted to share with him since the moment he saw Cole for the first time. It’s a poem, which talks about how Heidenreich is a tortured soul and his heart was broken years ago. Cole goes to leave and gets out, only after Heidenreich commands and receives a thank you. Thus ends one of the most disturbing segments in Smackdown history.

Charlie Haas vs. Spike Dudley

Non-title and here’s Tazz again to do solo commentary and Bubba and D-Von are in Spike’s corner. Charlie takes him down with an amateur hold to start, followed by a rather fast armdrag. The fans are too busy whistling at Miss Jackie (fair enough), who gets surrounded by Bubba and D-Von. It’s enough of a distraction for Bubba to snap the arm over the middle rope and Spike goes after the arm. That means the Bob Backlund lifting slam counter, followed by a top rope spinning crossbody counter. The Dudley Dog is broken up but D-Von comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D. This was little more than a way for Tazz to come back out and fill in some time in the ring. Haas and Jackie are fine enough as an act, but it’s almost impossible to have Haas, who isn’t the most interesting guy in the world, get attention when Jackie looks like she does. It’s not like the ending here was really in that much doubt, as it was going to be this or Bubba and D-Von cheating to give Spike the pin.

Post match the double beatdown is on until Rico returns for the save.

Carlito walks in front of moving cars to talk about how cool he is.

Next week: Undertaker vs. Mideon and Viscera. So Long can order non-contracted wrestlers into matches?

Speaking of Long, here he is for the contract signing. Before anyone else comes out, we get a quick poll on who the fans want to see face Big Show. Eddie seems to be the favorite, but here’s Big Show to make his decision. Angle, Reigns and Guerrero all join him though as this is getting a ridiculous amount of time. Before Show can make his choice, Angle says he doesn’t hold a grudge over his broken leg. He’s a businessman, and it would be bad business for Show to pick him. Show’s first pay per view match back should be against someone who doesn’t like him.

The right business move is to destroy Eddie, proving that Show will fight for the people. Eddie promises Show a fight that he’ll remember for the rest of his life. Long presents him with both contracts, with Tazz getting in a very nice point of clarity by saying which is which. The fans want a triple threat but Show isn’t sure what to do. He signs the Eddie contract but Angle jumps Guerrero.

Show laughs for a bit before breaking the Eddie contract over his knee and signing to face Angle. As usual: I don’t think WWE has any idea how contracts work. Reigns kicks Show in the face but Eddie gets back up and helps clear the ring. Long makes a tag match for next week’s main event to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. What in the world am I supposed to say about this one? The wrestling was more miss than hit, the show ended on a nearly fifteen minute Big Show segment, there was no commentary for a lot of the show, and….I know I’m forgetting something here. Something disturbing that has been brought up for nearly fifteen years since it actually took place and is the main thing that anyone remembers about a wrestler. Eh must have already been blocked from my mind for reasons of general disturbances. Nothing good to see here, though it wasn’t lacking energy for most of the night.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Main Event
Date: February 14, 2019
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Percy Watson, Renee Young

It’s the go home week for Elimination Chamber and that means a lot of recaps from Smackdown, as there isn’t actually a World Title match from the Raw side. Then again we’re promoting Wrestlemania at the same time so we’ll be seeing a lot from Seth Rollins and Paul Heyman too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Heavy Machinery vs. Ascension

Tucker headlocks Viktor to start and shoulders the heck out of him. It’s already off to Otis for a double three point shoulder to knock Viktor into the corner, meaning Konnor comes in to try his luck. That means the double stomach shot to Konnor’s head but a blind tag lets Viktor run Otis over. An elbow gets two and it’s time for the chinlock. Back up and Konnor misses a charge into the post, allowing Otis to come in and clean house again. The Caterpillar sets up the Compactor for the fast pin on Viktor at 5:53.

Rating: D. What did you expect from something like this? Heavy Machinery did their fun spots and there wasn’t a lot of time to really make it work. Ascension is one of the least important acts in the company and it’s not like they’re doing anything here. At least they got to show up on TV, which is more than a lot of wrestlers get to do at the moment.

Seth Rollins year in review.

From Raw.

Here’s Rollins to talk about Wrestlemania but he’d rather talk about the last twelve months. He accomplished a lot and it all culminated at the Royal Rumble. Rollins was at the top of the world but the next night it was knocked down with six F5’s. He’s never felt pain like that but what matters is he’s back up. Wrestlemania might be the last match of his career, but here’s Paul Heyman to interrupt. After teasing Lesnar being here (with Rollins not buying it), Heyman says he’s here to educate Seth.

For some reason Seth assumes that all men are created equal, but that’s not true. Rollins’ DNA does not match Lesnar’s because Brock is a rage filled monster. We call this a suicide mission, but Rollins says he’s fine with that. He’s tired of Lesnar holding the Universal Title hostage and he’ll do whatever it takes to prevent Lesnar from leaving Wrestlemania as champion. That’s not a prediction, but rather a spoiler. Heyman leaves and here’s Dean Ambrose….to tell Rollins to slay the beast. Dean sits down in the timekeeper’s area and Rollins leaves.

From Raw again.

HHH and Stephanie McMahon are in the ring to open the show with Stephanie talking about the “Elimination Chamber View” on Sunday before correcting herself. HOW DARE SHE GO OFF SCRIPT LIKE THAT!!!! So totally unprofessional. They run down the card with a focus on Ronda Rousey vs. Ruby Riott, leading into a recap of last week’s issues with Becky Lynch. This brings out Becky to say it’s nice to be here and nice to see both of them, especially since the swelling has gone down on Stephanie’s face. Becky: “I’ll hit you harder next time.”

Becky doesn’t get that because it was their idea to make her see a doctor in the first place. Stephanie: “Don’t be stubborn.” Becky: “SHUT YOUR FACE!” The McMahons have been screwing people over for decades and no one is stealing her opportunity. She’ll fight Vince himself if she has to but she’s not apologizing. Stephanie and Becky go face to face so HHH breaks it up and tells Becky that she has a choice. She can die on this hill and throw it all away or she can go to Wrestlemania. He wants an answer tonight.

From Raw yet again.

Here’s Becky for the decision, because somehow the ending of the go home show for Elimination Chamber is about HHH and Stephanie getting an apology to set up a Wrestlemania match. The bosses come out as well and talk about how Becky needs to accept the consequences for her actions so she can go to Wrestlemania. The fans don’t want Becky to do it so HHH tells her to ignore the fans and get Wrestlemania like she wants.

Becky quickly apologizes and walks away from a handshake, saying that now there is no one stopping her from her dream. HHH offers his congratulations, shakes Becky’s hand and says she’s going to Wrestlemania. Becky: “Wait that’s it?” HHH: “You’re going to Wrestlemania.” HHH and Stephanie leave as Becky starts talking about Ronda, who comes out to hear it in person.

Before it can get physical, here’s Vince McMahon to cut them off. He doesn’t buy the apology so Becky is suspended for SIXTY DAYS, meaning she’s out of Wrestlemania and Charlotte is in instead. Vince raises Charlotte’s arm and tells Rousey to get used to this scene, because it’s how Wrestlemania will end. I don’t think anyone really believes this is sticking, but it’s a nice cliffhanger.

From Smackdown.

Here’s Charlotte to open things up. After mocking the BECKY chants, Charlotte talks about how Becky screwed up last night, just like she always has. It was Becky who got hurt in November and gave Charlotte the spot instead, all so the myth of the Man could continue while Charlotte went to battle. She’s the background of the women’s division so Vince McMahon made a business decision so everything could work.

Becky isn’t coming out here right now because she’s a flash in the pan and not the kind of person Vince is taking a chance on. You can boo her now because she’s dedicating her win to Becky Lynch. Charlotte will be her in the front row at Elimination Chamber because we might have a new champion and she might have a new Wrestlemania opponent. Great heel promo here, as Charlotte plays that character to near perfection.

Elimination Chamber rundown.

Tyler Breeze/B Team vs. Jinder Mahal/B Team

Breeze and Sumir start things off and it’s an exchange of shoulders to start things off. Sunil comes in and has a dance off with Axel as we take the Main Event Abrupt Break. Back with Dallas and Sunil hitting a double clothesline, allowing the hot tag to Axel. Jinder comes in to run Axel over but Sumir dives into a raised boot. Sunil gets kicked out of the air as everything breaks down. A double superkick gets two on Breeze with Axel making the save. Sumir stops to dance (again) at Breeze, earning himself the Beauty Shot for the pin at 9:05.

Rating: C. This was a great example of a match where people were trying even though no one was watching them. Breeze and the B Team still have a lot of energy to them (that tends to be the case when they’re young and talented) and the Singh Brothers are trying as hard as they can because they’re not the biggest guys in the world and have to work harder to overcome it. Jinder is of course Jinder, but he’s better than he used to be.

And now, with all the Becky/Charlotte/Stephanie/HHH stuff out of the way, here’s a five minute highlight package from the Smackdown gauntlet match to wrap things up.

Overall Rating: F. The layout here was ridiculous with the one story being the only thing that really mattered. We’re coming up on the WWE Championship match in a major pay per view gimmick match and it gets five minutes at the end because we need to build up two matches that don’t take place for seven weeks? If you just have to have Elimination Chamber and Fastlane between the Rumble and Wrestlemania, at least pretend like they matter. Not one mention of the OTHER Elimination Chamber match outside of a graphic saying “hey this exists”? This is inexcusable and something that doesn’t even surprise me.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

205 Live
Date: February 12, 2019
Location: Huntington Center, Toledo, Ohio
Commentators: Aiden English, Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

We’re actually coming up on a fresh title match for a change as Akira Tozawa is the new #1 contender to Cruiserweight Champion Buddy Murphy, with his title shot coming on Sunday. As for tonight, we have a grudge match as Noam Dar gets to face Tony Nese in a No DQ match. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

The opening recap looks at Dar beating Nese last month and the ensuing brawl, which set up tonight’s match. It’s more appropriate here than Maverick talking.

Opening sequence.

Here’s the Lucha House Party for a chat. Gran Metalik asks where they are and Kalisto says they’re in Toledo, where it’s snowing. They’re upset that they didn’t get to finish their duet with Elias so they’ll settle for taking Jack Gallagher’s mustache and giving it to Penelope. Metalik is ready to sing but Gallagher cuts them off.

Jack Gallagher vs. Lince Dorado

Drew Gulak sits in on commentary and actually picks Tozawa to win the title on Sunday. You don’t get a definitive pick like that very often. Gallagher takes him down by the wrist to start so Dorado fights up and bounces off the ropes to send Gallagher flying instead. Gulak and English affirm that Humberto Carrillo is in fact a handsome man as Dorado hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker into a splash for two.

Gallagher is right back with a throat first drop across the top rope (thumbs up from Gulak) as we’re now talking about Carrillo’s taste in music. Dorado sends him outside and teases a big dive but Gallagher heads over for a handshake with Gulak. Back in and Gallagher takes Dorado down again and forearms him in the mask before cranking on both arms. It’s off to an abdominal stretch, which is quickly countered into a toss outside for a heck of a springboard dive.

A spinwheel kick to the head has English asking what would happen if Carrillo joined the Lucha House Party. Dorado hits a bottom and middle rope moonsault (Gulak: “I don’t understand this.”) before going up to the top, allowing Gallagher to get the knees up this time (Gulak: “THANK YOU!”). Gallagher hits a powerbomb but tries another, earning himself a monkey flip for the counter. So much for learning from your opponent’s mistake. The Golden Rewind gets two and Dorado takes him to the corner, only to get sunset flipped down to give Gallagher a very fast pin at 10:12.

Rating: C. Obsessive commentary about Carrillo aside, this was a nice match with Gallagher having to deal with the flipping power of Dorado. We’ve already seen Gulak vs. the Lucha House Party and while I don’t need to see something similar again, at least it’s something that you can almost guarantee to be watchable.

Gallagher jumps into Gulak’s arms to celebrate. Gulak: “See this Humberto Carrillo? YOU COULD BE A PART OF THIS!” Sweet goodness I haven’t heard this kind of praise since a Stephanie McMahon match.

Carrillo is willing to listen to Gallagher and Gulak.

Ariya Daivari is tired of dealing with failures on this show. He came here to serve himself and he already has the money and the miles. Next up is the Cruiserweight Title.

Mike Kanellis has worked sixteen years to get here and he’s not here to lose a match to Kalisto and Brian Kendrick. Maria says the losses are part of the process and it’s going to pay off. They’ve been successful everywhere and legends are made by THE match. I can go for more of these talk to the camera promos, especially when someone isn’t holding their own camera.

Noam Dar vs. Tony Nese

No DQ and Dar starts fast with a suicide dive before the bell. An early northern lights suplex gets two as Dar is extra fired up. Dar whips him into the steps before using said steps as a launchpad for a clothesline. He’s not done yet as he puts Nese’s fingers inside the hook that attaches the buckle to the post and bends them back. Nese is tired of getting beaten up and sends Dar into the post to take over.

Back in and Nese bridges him between a chair and the ropes for a springboard moonsault to start in on the ribs. A slam onto the chair makes things worse but Dar gets in a dragon screw legwhip for a breather. Dar’s t-bone suplex into the corner gets one and it’s time for some chairs, with a table as a bonus. A backdrop puts Nese onto the pile of chairs on the floor, drawing what sounds like a NIGEL chant. Well it’s not like either of these two have the strongest personalities.

Back in and Dar rams the knee into a chair but Nese goes for the pinkie for the save. I guess he’s been watching his Pete Dunne matches. The pumphandle driver onto the chair gives Nese two but Dar is back up. Dar gets smart by blocking a left hand with the chair, which he then wraps around Nese’s shoulder. The chair is used in a Fujiwara armbar but Nese turns it over for the break.

They head outside again with Dar getting knocked down, allowing Nese to pull the steps over with one arm. Nese hits him in the jaw before dropping Dar back first into the steps. Dar gets a triangle on the good arm but Nese lifts him up for a powerbomb through the announcers’ table, which is only good for two back inside. Shame too as that was easily the best thing so far.

The running knee hits the buckle and Dar hits a top rope double stomp onto the leg. An ankle lock with a grapevine goes on and since there are no rope breaks, Nese crawls underneath the ropes for the break. Nese’s chair to the knee rocks Dar and the running knee to the head drives him through the barricade for the next big crash. Dar is DONE so Nese throws him back inside for the pin at 19:10.

Rating: B-. This got a lot better once they started brawling but they could have cut off about five minutes to really make it better. They did something very good by having Nese win so definitively, as he could be moved up as a nice choice for a one off title match. I’m not sure where Dar goes, but he’ll be fine almost anywhere he winds up at this point.

We look at Akira Tozawa becoming #1 contender last week.

Tozawa, Buddy Murphy and Drake Maverick are in the back for the contract signing. Tozawa signs, so Buddy pulls out his phone and tells Tozawa to take a picture of himself with the title, because it’s as close as he’s going to get to it on Sunday. Murphy isn’t losing so he signs the contract. Tozawa actually brings up Neville (not by name) and says he took the title from him, just like he’ll do from Murphy. The staredown ends the show.

Overall Rating: C+. The main event had some very good spots but the title match stuff at the end felt entirely tacked on. What we got wasn’t bad though and I’m curious to see where they’re going after Sunday. It’s usually the complete opposite and it’s cool to see them doing something different for a change.

Make your own penitentiary jokes.

https://wrestlingrumors.net/tommyhall/not-penitentiary-jimmy-uso-arrested-disorderly-conduct/

Apparently he tried to fight a cop after he and Naomi were pulled over for going the wrong way on a one way street.  The car just happened to smell of alcohol, though it doesn’t appear Naomi, the driver, was drunk.  No word on what this means for the title match on Sunday, but egads this comes off as such a dumb move no matter how you look at it.  And now we’re even more likely to see Shane and Miz retain.  I’m so happy.

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 13, 2004
Location: KeyArena, Seattle, Washington
Attendance: 5,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

It’s the night after Unforgiven and things are back to the normal levels of bleak. In this case, that’s due to HHH winning the World Title again, because Randy Orton had his four week reign and needed to be eradicated once and for all. I’m sure he’ll get some title shots going forward, but it’s pretty clear that his time has already come and gone. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Unforgiven if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Ric Flair, Batista and a bunch of women are in the ring for HHH’s title celebration. Flair introduces the new champ as the confetti falls. Great now it’s going to be all over ringside all night. There’s also a huge cake, which is clearly the kind with a person inside to jump out. HHH says you can feel the excitement in the air because the king is back on his throne. This is the happiest he’s sounded in months, which certainly does make sense for him.

All of the girls kneel in front of him, so HHH says there will be plenty of time for getting on their knees. Normally I’d make a PG joke but the Diva Search girls have made that one sound tame. HHH talks about Orton spitting on him a few weeks back, but now he’s laughing again. Then he spit in the fans’ faces and they can’t even wipe it off because he’s the World Heavyweight Champion.

The girls rip his shirt off but HHH looks at the cake, which he knows has someone inside. Flair and Batista didn’t send it, so it must have been Bischoff. An explosion goes off and of course it’s Orton to take out Evolution. So…..was there a girl in there in the first place and Orton kidnapped her? Or did he just pay off the production people? HHH gets thrown into the hole in the cake, leaving his feet kicking in the air for a funny bit. Not funny enough to validate HHH getting another long promo or another title reign or how obvious the whole thing was, but funny.

It’s so funny that we look at it again after a break. During said break, HHH got out of the cake and kept falling over from the icing.

HHH yells at Bischoff and gets Orton in a handicap match tonight.

Chris Benoit vs. Robert Conway

William Regal comes out to cancel out Sylvan Grenier. Conway jumps him to start so Benoit slides between the legs and goes with the chops. It’s way too early for the Sharpshooter as Conway bails outside for a breather. Back in and Conway snaps off a suplex to take over, meaning we hit the stomping and choking. A neck crank doesn’t last long as Benoit fights up, only to get thrown to the floor almost immediately.

Back in and Benoit hooks a quick small package for two but Conway chokes him right back down. Conway has him in trouble again as Benoit is giving Conway more than he’s ever gotten in his career. Benoit finally fights back with forearms and a snap suplex for two of his own. It’s time to crank things up and Benoit rolls some German suplexes, setting up the Crossface for the win.

Rating: C-. That’s a fine way to go with Benoit, as he made Conway look good for a little while and then won without much effort as soon as he started putting in some effort. Benoit isn’t about to lose to Conway but Conway can get a lot out of just beating on Benoit for a few minutes. Nothing great or even very good, but what we got was fine.

Shelton Benjamin is coming back.

Taboo Tuesday is coming.

Here’s Stacy Keibler for this week’s Diva Search segment, which is a Seattle Slugfest. Molly Holly (with her regular hair) comes out to interrupt instead though and says the girls can have their “sl**” fest later (that’s a major swear from Molly). For right now though, it’s time for the two of them to have a competition of their own, with Stacy getting the pick.

That would be a dance off, but Molly had eight years of ballet classes. She requests to dance to William Regal’s music and does just fine, as expected. Stacy does the kind of dance you would expect from her and seems to be declared the winner. Molly jumps her from behind, drawing in Nidia, Gail Kim, Victoria and Trish Stratus for the big brawl. Bischoff, six woman, bell.

Trish Stratus/Molly Holly/Gail Kim vs. Stacy Keibler/Nidia/Victoria

Joined in progress with the Nidia hitting Trish with a middle rope crossbody. A spinebuster cuts Nidia down for two though and some right hands keep Nidia in trouble. It’s off to Gail as the fans want Stacy, likely due to her barely existing skirt. Gail’s half crab has Nidia screaming until she makes a rope. Molly comes in as Lawler makes jokes about the Diva Search girls boxing later. A neckbreaker takes Gail down and thankfully it’s off to Victoria instead of Stacy. Victoria gets to clean house on her own until Molly ties her in the Tree of Woe. That’s enough for Stacy to tag herself in though and grab a rollup to pin Molly.

Rating: D. What were you expecting here? Stacy has no business being in there and Nidia isn’t exactly good either. That leaves four women to carry a six woman tag and it’s not the easiest thing in the world when one of the women worked most of the match. It wasn’t good, but at least it was short and that’s about as good as it gets.

Kane comes in to Bischoff and wants Shawn Michaels tonight. Bischoff can’t do that as Shawn is booked for the Highlight Reel, so Kane grabs him by the throat. Since Shawn isn’t happening tonight, Kane can fight him any other night. As for tonight, Bischoff will find someone and Kane can have a No DQ match with no questions asked.

It’s time for the Highlight Reel with Jericho talking about last night’s brutal match but it was all worth it (even the ladder suppository) to get the Intercontinental Title back. That’s a record breaking seven times, which brings him to his guest, who is a former Intercontinental Champion in his own right. This brings out Shawn, who talks about beating Kane even uglier than he was before. Jericho agrees that it was impressive, but not quite as impressive as winning the Intercontinental Title for the SEVENTH TIME.

Actually that’s why Shawn is out here, because they’re neck and neck over the years. They’ve met in Seattle before so let’s do it one more time for the title. Cue Christian and Tyson Tomko with Christian talking about how awesome his career has been. He’s so awesome that he should get the Intercontinental Title shot right now. Shawn says deal, as soon as Christian beat shim. Jericho says not so fast, because he knows what is going to happen.

Everyone knows what’s going to happen and is willing to read the front row’s minds. A lot of fans are really excited to see it but section 53 knows that Tyson Tomko is going to interfere. There’s a kid that knows the solution though: let’s have a tag match! So the kid is the reason we’re not seeing Shawn vs. Christian or Jericho? Someone throw that kid in a closet, cover him in peanut butter and let a trio of rabid squirrels loose.

Christian/Tyson Tomko vs. Shawn Michaels/Chris Jericho

Joined in progress with Shawn chopping away at Christian (with bad ribs) before handing it off to Jericho for a suplex. It’s already back to Shawn to slug away at Tomko in the corner before tripping him down for a basement dropkick. One heck of a clothesline takes Shawn’s head off (Lawler: “PROBLEM SOLVED!”) and the villains take over. JR uses a neck crank to recap the evening (not the worst idea in the world), followed by Christian coming in to stomp away.

A flying forearm gets Shawn out of trouble though and it’s back to Jericho so the pace can pick up. The springboard dropkick puts Tomko on the floor with Christian following him, setting up the big stereo dives. We take a break (allowing me to drool over the idea Shawn and Jericho as a full time team) and come back with Jericho in trouble as Christian slaps on a chinlock with a knee in the back.

Christian’s backbreaker gets two and Tomko pulls on the ribs again. Jericho finally avoids a charge from Christian and the hot tag brings in Shawn to clean house. The top rope elbow hits Tomko but Christian crotches Shawn against the post for a save. Jericho cuts Christian off and it’s Sweet Chin Music to finish Tomko.

Rating: D+. That’s a “well that happened” if I’ve ever seen one. The more talented team won and it’s not like there was anything important happening here. You can’t tease a Shawn vs. Jericho or Shawn vs. Christian match and then go with this lame tag match, but for some reason that’s as good as we can get. Not a terrible match, but quite the downgrade.

Post match Christian gives Shawn the Unprettier on the floor.

Simon Dean, a fitness guru with his own Simon System of weight loss products, is looking forward to helping us lose weight. This is set up like an old commercial for a product, complete with a phone number and payment plan, which gives me some nice flashbacks to the old WCW days.

It’s Diva Search time with Coach hosting. The three come out with JR having to handle the mini bios, making him sound like a very sad man indeed. Joy is eliminated so Christy and Carmella put on the huge boxing gloves. Thankfully Vince McMahon comes out to interrupt and talk about next week being the season premiere of Raw.

Christy hits him low and chokes him down before biting him on the back of the pants. Carmella goes more traditional with rights to the face, one of which knocks Coach down. That means Christy wins, because duh. The winner of the whole thing is announced next week, thank goodness.

Eugene has a very separated shoulder after last week’s attack from HHH.

Kane vs. Gene Snitsky

No DQ. Kane clotheslines him down to start and hits a big boot to the side of the head as Lawler makes fun of JR for not knowing Snitsky. A raised boot in the corner slows Kane down and Snitsky hits those big right hands of his, which start with a big pull back and finish with a bigger follow through. It looks like he’s aiming for Kane’s stomach.

Snitsky hits him low to cut off a chokeslam attempt but Kane kicks him down again. Kane wraps the chair around Snitsky’s throat but Lita gets in and takes it off. That means an argument, allowing Snitsky to chair Kane in the back, sending him right onto Lita. That means a no contest, and likely a miscarriage.

We get the big stretcher job as Lita holds her stomach and Kane tells her that the baby is going to be ok. After a break, we get a BABY KILLER chant, which you don’t get to hear very often.

Smackdown Rebound.

Post break, Kane helps Lita into an ambulance as Stacy and Victoria look on.

Evolution vs. Randy Orton

Flair jumps Orton before the bell so Orton backdrops him down to check off the Bingo square. It’s off to HHH (Not Batista first?) to get punched in the face but Orton slides outside and pulls Batista down onto the apron. Batista comes in legally so Orton slugs away again until a spinebuster takes him down. Now HHH is willing to come in for some shots to the face but the Pedigree is countered with a slingshot, sending HHH crotch first into the buckle. The RKO is loaded up but Batista comes in with the clothesline and that’s a lame DQ.

Post match the beatdown is on until Shelton Benjamin makes his return for the save….and gets beaten down. Benoit makes the real save and Batista takes the beatdown to end the show. Wouldn’t it have been more productive to have those run-ins in reverse? Eh at least the six man should be good.

Overall Rating: D. That ending segment is a perfect compliment to the opener: Orton gets the better of HHH at the beginning and the end, but none of that really matters as HHH is still the champion. That’s not exactly something that makes me want to see where things are going, because things are going in the direction of more HHH on top with HAHA I’M STILL CHAMPION being the big closing line every week. It’s been that way for far too long now and that’s not the right way to make me want to keep watching.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

IMG Credit: WWE

Smackdown
Date: February 12, 2019
Location: Huntington Center, Toledo, Ohio
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

It’s the go home show for Elimination Chamber and we have some big matches to get through. As was the case last night on Raw, we’ll have some kind of a match to determine the other team starting the women’s tag team Elimination Chamber match. On the opposite end, there is also a gauntlet match to determine who will enter the men’s Elimination Chamber match last. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

In Memory of Pedro Morales. I’m sure we’ll get the full video tribute on Raw.

We see the end of last night’s Raw with Charlotte replacing Becky Lynch in the Raw Women’s Title match at Wrestlemania. Still works for me.

A member of New Day will replace the injured Mustafa Ali in the Elimination Chamber. It was going to be one of them or Rey/Andrade so that’s fine.

Here’s Charlotte to open things up. After mocking the BECKY chants, Charlotte talks about how Becky screwed up last night, just like she always has. It was Becky who got hurt in November and gave Charlotte the spot instead, all so the myth of the Man could continue while Charlotte went to battle. She’s the background of the women’s division so Vince McMahon made a business decision so everything could work.

Becky isn’t coming out here right now because she’s a flash in the pan and not the kind of person Vince is taking a chance on. You can boo her now because she’s dedicating her win to Becky Lynch. Charlotte will be her in the front row at Elimination Chamber because we might have a new champion and she might have a new Wrestlemania opponent. Great heel promo here, as Charlotte plays that character to near perfection.

Carmella/Naomi vs. IIconics vs. Fire and Desire

The losers start the Elimination Chamber with Bayley/Sasha Banks. Before the match, all three teams talk about how they should be champions and how they have an advantage. Mandy and Carmella trade waistlocks to start as Graves praises the IIconics for being smart enough not to start since losing is all that matters here. Sonya comes in and gets kicked in the ribs a few times, allowing Naomi to grab a quickly broken armbar. Naomi’s splits splash gets two and it’s back to Carmella, who gets taken down without much effort. Of course her response is to dance because it’s all about showing off rather than hurting someone.

Mandy tags herself in but has to run from Naomi, who catches up to her on the floor as we take a break. Back with Carmella caught in a waistlock because Carmella seems to exist to dance and be in trouble. They both hit crossbodies at the same time (well Carmella just stood up straight instead of jumping or turning for a double knockdown). Mandy and Naomi come in off the hot tags to clean house, including the spinning jawbreaker from Naomi. The split legged moonsault finishes Mandy at 8:58.

Rating: D+. When did I start not liking Carmella that much? She’s just kind of there as a person to fill in a spot but she’s still the woman that was beating Charlotte and Asuka last year despite there being no reason for that to have happened. It’s hard to let go of that, though it’s not like she and Naomi have any real chance of winning the titles.

We get a graphic showing which two teams will be starting the match, which looks like it was made in 2004.

Bayley says Sasha will be in the Chamber on Sunday.

Tamina and Nia Jax say no one is walking out of the Chamber once they get done with them.

Liv Morgan will walk through fire for Sarah Logan and it’s going to be a new side of the Riott Squad on Sunday.

Mustafa Ali talks about the big hits he’s been taking and he’s upset about not having an opportunity at the WWE Championship. This is not the end and he’ll be back because he writes his story.

Here are Miz and Shane McMahon for McMizTV (take me now). Last week Miz was doing a photo shoot for his reality show and Shane was filming a guest spot for NCIS: Los Angeles. With that out of the way, here are this week’s guests: the Usos. They’re going to stand instead of having a seat and talk about how Miz and Shane may be champions but they don’t know each other. We get the Tag Team Test, which is listing off various facts about your partner, though Miz whispers the answers in Shane’s ear. Miz: “WHAT’S MY FAVORITE FOOD? Quiche.” Shane: “QUICHE! Quiche?”

They bring up the Mandy Rose issue before Shane threatens to hit Jimmy so hard that Jey will feel it. The Usos hit their catchphrase and drop the mic but Shane says the titles are the only things that are real. Shane: “You dig?” Double superkicks leave the champs laying, as it somehow becomes more obvious that they’re retaining the titles on Sunday. You know, because Shane McMahon as a champion is just something that happens in 2019.

Video on the Million Man March.

Here are Daniel Bryan and Rowan, with the former calling the fans fickle. He doesn’t need to be in the Elimination Chamber because it’s far more important that he keep the WWE Championship and help the world. He’s cut off though and we have a lot of time for the main event.

Gauntlet Match

Non-title but the winner gets to enter the Chamber last. Bryan and….Kofi Kingston start things off. I do love how they tease that it’s going to be anyone other than the singles member of the team. Bryan takes him down with a headlock to start and flips backwards into a leglock. Kofi sends Bryan outside, only to have Bryan come back in with a wristlock. Some knees to the ribs keep Kofi in trouble and it’s the surfboard double stomp to the knees.

Kofi fights up and kicks Bryan to the floor, setting up a big dive as we take a break. Back with Kofi in trouble again as Bryan hits a running dropkick to the back, sending Kofi to the apron. A middle rope knee to the back looks to set up the Swan Dive but Bryan only hits mat. Kofi is right back with a Boom Drop and a flipping splash for two.

Kofi’s springboard spinning crossbody gets two but Bryan ties him in the Tree of Woe for a sliding dropkick. A belly to back superplex is countered with Kofi landing on Bryan’s face as we take a break. Back with Bryan winning a strike off and hitting the YES Kicks, including the big one for two. They hit the pinfall reversal sequence but you don’t grapple with Bryan, who reverses into the LeBell Lock. Kofi manages a rope though and Bryan goes up, only to dive into a dropkick (despite landing on his feet before Kofi hit him).

Rowan trips Kofi so Big E. and Xavier go after him, earning a triple elimination. Bryan kicks away but misses the running corner dropkick, allowing Rowan, who I guess just stayed, to pull Kofi outside and send him into the timekeeper’s area. That means another ejection (or maybe a first) and it’s Bryan charging straight into Trouble in Paradise for the big upset at 24:30.

Jeff Hardy is in third and we come back with Kofi missing a dive into the barricade. Hardy jumps off the steps to take him out but the Swanton misses. Kofi can’t follow up though, allowing Jeff to hit the basement dropkick, which is countered into a rollup for two. The slingshot dropkick in the corner misses but Jeff catches him on top. That means a high crossbody for two, followed by the SOS to get rid of Hardy at 33:18.

Samoa Joe is in fourth and we come back with Joe hitting his corner enziguri for a close two. The abdominal stretch goes on, followed by a chinlock but Kofi sends him outside and hits a dive for a double eight count. Back in and Joe blasts him with a clothesline, followed by an atomic drop to put Kofi down again. The running backsplash gets two and Joe is incredibly frustrated.

Kofi gets to the apron for a springboard but Joe shoves him down, allowing him to stand next to the ropes and calmly count with the referee. It’s only an eight count again though and the neck crank is on. Kofi fights up and tries some clotheslines but gets caught in the Koquina Clutch. That means a climb up the corner though and Kofi flips back to pin Joe at 46:22.

Joe isn’t done though and suplexes the heck out of Kofi, followed by a Koquina Clutch on the floor. Shouldn’t that be a DQ since the next fall begins immediately? AJ Styles runs out fifth for the save and punches Joe to the back. We come back with Kofi barely able to get in the ring and AJ saying he doesn’t have to do this. Kofi says he can do this and shoves AJ, who slugs him down to start the next fall. A backbreaker gives AJ two and he starts in on the knee, followed by a snap suplex for two.

They hit a quick pinfall reversal sequence until AJ gets an STO backbreaker to really put Kofi down. Kofi fights back again and they head to the apron with Kofi missing a hard charge to slam knee first into the post. Somehow Kofi dives back in at nine and blocks a super hurricanrana to send AJ crashing to the mat. A top rope splash to AJ’s standing back (kind of like Shadows Over H***) gets two but AJ pulls him into the Calf Crusher. Kofi finally taps at 59:57 so here are Big E. and Xavier to carry him out. RKO outta nowhere finishes AJ at 1:00:58.

Rating: B-. You knew this was going to be long but the important thing is that it didn’t feel long. Kofi’s performance was great and you could make a case for him getting the Fastlane title shot assuming Bryan retains on Sunday. A nice celebration of his career is a fine idea and something that would work fine on a nothing pay per view like Fastlane. The ending was pretty clear, but there’s nothing wrong with something like that in this case. Good match, with Kofi getting a very nice rub.

Overall Rating: C+. This was a really different kind of show with only two matches, though both of them mattered for Sunday. That made this show feel WAY more like a go home show because it wasn’t spending time on stuff for Wrestlemania. Aside from the opening promo, this was all about Elimination Chamber and that’s what Monday should have felt like. There’s time to set up Wrestlemania later and putting some material in here is fine, but treat Sunday like it matters, even if it really doesn’t all that much.

Results

Carmella/Naomi b. IIconics and Fire and Desire – Split legged moonsault to Rose

Randy Orton won a gauntlet match last eliminating AJ Styles – RKO

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

https://www.wwe.com/article/pedro-morales-passes-away

Pedro is someone who doesn’t get the recognition he deserves.  He was the first Latino World Champion in the WW(W)F and the first ever Triple Crown Champion.  As for his legacy, he still holds the record for most combined days as Intercontinental Champion.  His reign of 1027 days as WWWF World Champion is the fifth longest of all time, with only Bruno (twice), Hogan and Backlund being ahead of him.  He’s not that well remembered but the New York fans loved him and there’s a reason he was champion for more than twice as long as Lesnar’s big Universal Title reign.

IMG Credit: WWE

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 11, 2019
Location: Van Andel Arena, Grand Rapids, Michigan
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Renee Young

It’s the go home Raw before Elimination Chamber and, thanks to some announcements made earlier in the day, we now have some matches for Sunday from the red side. As for tonight, Becky Lynch has been invited to the show and Seth Rollins is ready to respond to Brock Lesnar after the beatdown from two weeks ago. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

HHH and Stephanie McMahon are in the ring to open the show with Stephanie talking about the “Elimination Chamber View” on Sunday before correcting herself. HOW DARE SHE GO OFF SCRIPT LIKE THAT!!!! So totally unprofessional. They run down the card with a focus on Ronda Rousey vs. Ruby Riott, leading into a recap of last week’s issues with Becky Lynch. This brings out Becky to say it’s nice to be here and nice to see both of them, especially since the swelling has gone down on Stephanie’s face. Becky: “I’ll hit you harder next time.”

Becky doesn’t get that because it was their idea to make her see a doctor in the first place. Stephanie: “Don’t be stubborn.” Becky: “SHUT YOUR FACE!” The McMahons have been screwing people over for decades and no one is stealing her opportunity. She’ll fight Vince himself if she has to but she’s not apologizing. Stephanie and Becky go face to face so HHH breaks it up and tells Becky that she has a choice. She can die on this hill and throw it all away or she can go to Wrestlemania. He wants an answer tonight.

Boss And Hug Connection vs. Nia Jax/Tamina vs. Liv Morgan/Sarah Logan

The team that takes the fall enters the Chamber first. During their entrances, Bayley and Sasha summarize their year and say nothing can break them no matter what. Nia and Tamina promise to win because they’re Samoans. Since you don’t want to be in first here, Sasha makes Morgan start with Nia and then bails to the floor before a tag. Logan tries to headbutt Nia and just gets headbutted back down. No one can do anything with Nia so thankfully it’s off to Tamina for a chinlock on Morgan. Nia comes back in so Liv kicks away at the knee but Bayley tags herself in.

The Squad beats Bayley and Sasha down as we take a break. Back with Banks down on the floor (again) as Bayley gets beaten down by the Samoan Slaughterhouse (yes the Samoan Slaughterhouse, which someone got paid to create). Sasha is taken out by medics as the beatdown continues without much effort. Bayley fights up and makes the tag off to Logan, who gets chinlocked as well.

The top rope splash misses though and it’s back to Bayley to clean house. Why she doesn’t just sit on the floor or walk out since there’s no benefit to winning the match isn’t clear, but my guess is general face nitwitedness. The running dropkick beneath the bottom rope hits Morgan and the top rope elbow gets two as Logan saves. There’s the Bayley to Belly to Morgan but Tamina is back in with a superkick. Nia comes in with the Samoan drop to finish Bayley at 14:40.

Rating: D+. I’ve seen worse and while it’s understandable that they can’t have Banks in the ring, the inclusion of Nia and Tamina just sucks the life out of anything. They’re going to get pushed because they’re monsters and they’ll tell you about how Samoan they are, which is the extent of anything they have going for them. Bayley and Banks as the first entrants can make for a heck of a run, though I can’t imagine they actually win.

Elias is in the ring as Becky is contemplating things in the back. Balor comes up to her and talks about Bobby Lashley and Lio Rush (dude stop being selfish). He knows she’ll do the right thing and take care of things. Becky: “You’re still awesome.”

Elias is ready to perform but we get a long video on Seth Rollins’ rise back up the ranks to the main event of Wrestlemania.

Elias is ready to play one more time but here’s Lucha House Party to cut him off. That’s enough for Elias, who snaps about being disrespected and his album not being nominated or a Grammy. Kalisto tells him to chill, because they want to walk with Elias. It’s finally time to sing the song, which is about how terrible it is to be in Grand Rapids. Kalisto gets in some guitar playing of his own and does quite well, earning himself a guitar to the back. Elias bails before he gets beaten down as well. I’ve heard worse ideas for a short feud.

Finn Balor vs. Drew McIntyre

Lashley and Rush are at ringside. An early Rush distraction lets McIntyre hammer away and the chinlock goes on in a hurry. Balor sends him into the corner but gets pulled out to the apron. A missed charge sends McIntyre hard into the post but it’s Lashley grabbing the boot to break up a dive. One heck of a dropkick through the ropes drops Rush and it’s a Sling Blade to McIntyre, drawing in Lashley for the DQ at 3:02.

Rating: D+. Not enough time to mean anything but it was an angle instead of a match anyway. They were smart to not have McIntyre take a fall here as there was no point to this being anything other than a DQ. It served a purpose and let us have an energetic burst, at least while it lasted before what is likely a tag match.

Post match the beatdown is on until Kurt Angle makes the save. Rush gets his ankle locked until Baron Corbin runs in to take Angle out. Braun Strowman makes the final save and Corbin actually stays to fight, with McIntyre saving him from the powerslam. You know what’s next.

Baron Corbin/Lio Rush/Drew McIntyre vs. Kurt Angle/Finn Balor/Braun Strowman

Joined in progress with McIntyre in trouble until he drives Balor into the corner for some choking on the ropes. Balor fights over and brings in Angle without much trouble, meaning Kurt can clean some house. A middle rope missile dropkick (didn’t look to make much contact but a camera cut makes the save) sets up the Angle Slam for two with Lashley making the save. Lashley plants Angle with a Downward Spiral and it’s Corbin grabbing the chinlock.

Angle fights back until getting sent to the floor as we take a break. Back with Balor fighting back but having the Sling Blade countered into a chokebreaker for two. Lashley comes back in to stay on the ropes but a powerbomb is countered into a basement dropkick. McIntyre and Strowman knock each other down on the floor, leaving Balor to block the spear and dive on McIntyre in a quick switch. Back in and Balor knocks Rush down, allowing Lashley to crotch him on top.

The spinning Dominator gets the pin on Balor, despite the boot being on the rope. I’m not sure what the point of a screwy finish there would be but it might not have been intentional. Cue a second referee to say what happened and the match is CONTINUING after another break. Good grief this is as obvious of a case of a match being extended that I can remember seeing in a long time.

Back again with Balor in trouble as Strowman has been knocked over the barricade and Angle is down outside. Balor fights out of a chinlock and hits a double stomp to Lashley, which is enough to tag in Strowman for the real comeback. Strowman heads outside for the running shoulders around the ring, followed by the running powerslam to Lashley. Balor adds the Coup de Grace for the pin at 22:18.

Rating: D. This was far from the worst match I’ve ever seen or even a terrible one but it felt like it went on for hours. There are very few things more annoying than a match that keeps going because it needs to keep going, which is exactly what was happening here. It doesn’t exactly help that this isn’t the most thrilling set of feuds in the world. Balor vs. Lashley is fine, but it wasn’t much more than that.

Kevin Owens is at a bowling alley and says he’s been spending as much time as he can with his family during his time off. He and his son have been watching Raw and it’s rather hard sometimes. It’s either going to be Raw or Smackdown but he’ll be back in about a month. Owens throws a gutter ball and seems rather ok with things.

Becky has no answer for what she’s going to do.

Video on the March on Washington.

Nikki Cross vs. Ruby Riott

This could be interesting. Nikki tells her to come on and grabs a rather aggressive headlock. The sleeper goes on with Riott standing up to drive her into the corner. Riott uses the knees to drive Nikki face first into the buckle as we cut to (full screen of course) Ronda Rousey getting in Becky’s face to say it’s bigger than two of them. Becky needs to man up and apologize, even if she doesn’t mean it.

Back to the match (because we can cut away from this but not Baron Corbin Chinlock Theater) with Nikki getting put down with an STO for two. Another STO on the apron is countered into a layout reverse DDT to put Riott on the floor. Ruby gets caught in the ring skirt for some forearms to the head but Riott kicks her off the top. The Riott Kick finishes Cross at 5:22.

Rating: C-. Completely unnecessary time away from the match aside (it came after a twenty two minute match and they take it away from a five minute match instead), this was entertaining while it lasted and Riott getting a win is fine. It’s also ok with Cross losing as she isn’t the kind of person who is going to be hurt by a loss due to her complete insanity.

Here’s Rollins to talk about Wrestlemania but he’d rather talk about the last twelve months. He accomplished a lot and it all culminated at the Royal Rumble. Rollins was at the top of the world but the next night it was knocked down with six F5’s. He’s never felt pain like that but what matters is he’s back up. Wrestlemania might be the last match of his career, but here’s Paul Heyman to interrupt. After teasing Lesnar being here (with Rollins not buying it), Heyman says he’s here to educate Seth.

For some reason Seth assumes that all men are created equal, but that’s not true. Rollins’ DNA does not match Lesnar’s because Brock is a rage filled monster. We call this a suicide mission, but Rollins says he’s fine with that. He’s tired of Lesnar holding the Universal Title hostage and he’ll do whatever it takes to prevent Lesnar from leaving Wrestlemania as champion. That’s not a prediction, but rather a spoiler. Heyman leaves and here’s Dean Ambrose….to tell Rollins to slay the beast. Dean sits down in the timekeeper’s area and Rollins leaves.

EC3 vs. Dean Ambrose

After the IIconics say winning the titles would be the perfect coronation for them, EC3 kicks and punches away to start, followed by a middle rope dropkick. A suplex sets up a nerve hold but EC3 can’t hit the 1%er. Instead he goes shoulder first into the post and Dean makes the comeback with a Boss Man Slam getting two. So is Dean suddenly just a face again? He’s certainly wrestling like one. EC3 crotches him on top but gets small packaged to give Dean a fast pin at 3:54.

Rating: D+. Uh….ok then. So Dean is leaving in less than two months and is now trading wins with the newcomer while suddenly turning face after months of being a heel? It makes as much sense as some of the things they’re doing right now, but that’s never stopped them before and it won’t do it now.

Alexa Bliss tells Becky not to apologize, which Becky knows is just a way to get into the title shot at Wrestlemania. Bliss says do whatever you want, but an apology makes you the Irish girl who swallowed her pride and sold out. Becky: “If I apologize, the only thing I’ll be selling out is Wrestlemania.”

Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Bobby Roode/Chad Gable

Roode and Gable are defending. Wilder slams his way out of an armbar to start and brings Dawson in. That means another armbar from Gable as everything breaks down. The champs are sent outside with Gable hitting a moonsault onto both of them as we take a break. Back with Roode fighting out of a chinlock and bringing Gable back in. Dawson takes him down with another chinlock and it’s time to go after the arm.

A hard belly to back suplex sets up an assisted legdrop for two from Wilder. Another chinlock is broken up with another belly to back suplex but Roode gets pulled off the apron. Back from another break with Dawson getting catapulted into the corner, allowing the hot tag to Roode. House cleaning ensues with Roode bailing out on the Blockbuster but settling for a heck of a spinebuster for two on Wilder. Revival makes a blind tag though and a Gory Special/bulldog combination gives Dawson two (cool move at least).

Gable comes back in with a high crossbody to Dawson, followed by a Blockbuster/German suplex combination (with Wilder landing on his head) for another near fall. Wilder gets Gable up for a powerbomb (after a sunset FLIP off the top) with Dawson adding the top rope clothesline but Roode dives in for the last second save. Roode sends the Revival into each other, leaving Dawson to catch him with a DDT. A quick jackknife rollup gives Gable two but it’s a blind tag into the Shatter Machine to FINALLY make the Revival champions at 19:50.

Rating: B+. Well it took long enough and at least they won the belts in a very good match. I have no idea if this is going to put the Revival Might Leave rumors to bed but at least everything worked on the way there and we had an awesome match to finish things off. Roode and Gable never felt like anything more than transitional champions and there’s nothing wrong with that. Revival is LONG overdue to win these things and I’m rather pleased with how we got here.

Post match, Revival heads to the back and says they’ve been telling everyone that they’re the best and now they’ve proven it.

Here’s Becky for the decision, because somehow the ending of the go home show for Elimination Chamber is about HHH and Stephanie getting an apology to set up a Wrestlemania match. The bosses come out as well and talk about how Becky needs to accept the consequences for her actions so she can go to Wrestlemania. The fans don’t want Becky to do it so HHH tells her to ignore the fans and get Wrestlemania like she wants.

Becky quickly apologizes and walks away from a handshake, saying that now there is no one stopping her from her dream. HHH offers his congratulations, shakes Becky’s hand and says she’s going to Wrestlemania. Becky: “Wait that’s it?” HHH: “You’re going to Wrestlemania.” HHH and Stephanie leave as Becky starts talking about Ronda, who comes out to hear it in person.

Before it can get physical, here’s Vince McMahon to cut them off. He doesn’t buy the apology so Becky is suspended for SIXTY DAYS, meaning she’s out of Wrestlemania and Charlotte is in instead. Vince raises Charlotte’s arm and tells Rousey to get used to this scene, because it’s how Wrestlemania will end. I don’t think anyone really believes this is sticking, but it’s a nice cliffhanger.

Overall Rating: C-. That’s a crazy nice bump at the end as this was looking like a terrible show until the last thirty five minutes or so. The big thing continues to be WWE not knowing where to focus though, as we’re dealing with Wrestlemania build while also setting up Elimination Chamber on Sunday. It’s not going to get any better with Fastlane taking place in less than a month, and that’s not a good idea with so much other stuff going on.

At some point they need to pick a focus and stick with it, because we’re getting two half builds instead of one good one. That’s fine when it’s building to a big match, but I find it hard to care that much when the major Raw match on Sunday is for the inaugural Women’s Tag Team Titles and the first champions might not even be on this show. The last fourth or so of this show is good, but the rest is about as skippable as you can ask for.

Results

Nia Jax/Tamina b. Boss and Hug Connects and Sarah Logan/Liv Morgan – Samoan drop to Bayley

Finn Balor b. Drew McIntyre via DQ when Bobby Lashley interfered

Finn Balor/Braun Strowman/Kurt Angle b. Drew McIntyre/Bobby Lashley/Baron Corbin – Coup de Grace to Lashley

Ruby Riott b. Nikki Cross – Riott Kick

Revival b. Chad Gable/Bobby Roode – Shatter Machine to Gable

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And it’s a good one.Becky Lynch apologized to HHH and Stephanie and was told that she’s going to Wrestlemania.  The bosses left but Vince came out to say that he didn’t buy the apology, meaning Becky is suspended until after Wrestlemania.  Charlotte will be taking her place against Ronda Rousey.

I don’t think anyone buys this as an ending that is going to stick (you can see the triple threat coming from here) but it’s a nice way to buy some time with all of the shows that they have to fill up between now and New Jersey.  This was a lot better than I was expecting and I’m looking forward to the storytelling, even if it seems destined to be equally about the McMahons.

I uh…..yeah.The Revival FINALLY won the Tag Team Titles.  I don’t know if it’s going to keep them on the show, but my goodness this was overdue and I was actually happy to see it happen.  Very well deserved and please let them have a nice reign.