Smackdown
Date: September 26, 2017
Location: Gila River Arena, Glendale, Arizona
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

We’re coming up on the Cell and that means we have to start hammering home some of the matches. At the moment we have at least one Cell match set, along with the World and Tag Team Title matches, either of which could wind up being changed to the second Cell match of the card. Other than that, there isn’t much to go on so let’s get to it.

The opening recap looks at Shane McMahon vs. Kevin Owens, which is easily the top story on the show at the moment. We hear the comments from both guys last week with both of them threatening some intense violence.

Here’s Owens to open things up, asking where Shane is tonight. Owens is tired of being called a coward over and over but maybe Shane is the coward. He knows better than that though because Shane is no coward. Not only does he respect Vince McMahon but he even likes him. If that’s what he’ll do to someone he likes, what will he do to Shane, who he doesn’t like?

This brings out Sami Zayn, who says Owens has lost complete control. Owens headbutted VINCE MCMAHON and anytime Owens snaps like that, it doesn’t end well. If Owens knows what’s good for him, he needs to stop right now. Owens laughs it off and talks about Sami signing with WWE two and a half years before him but it was Owens winning the US Title at Wrestlemania while Sami watched from the back.

Owens did indeed attack Vince McMahon and it was the best thing he could do because he did something, unlike Zayn. Sami says his day is coming and he’ll do it the right way. Sure Kevin has won a bunch of titles that Sami hasn’t but at least he doesn’t see a pile of trash when he looks in the mirror. Cue Daniel Bryan to make the main event for tonight.

Tye Dillinger vs. Baron Corbin

Fallout from last week when Corbin was scheduled to have a US Title shot but Dillinger injured Corbin’s ankle in a pre-match brawl. Hang on a second though as here’s AJ Styles to join commentary. The distraction lets Tye throw Corbin over the top in a heap and we go to a break before the bell.

We’re joined in progress with Corbin getting two off a chokebreaker. An attempt at a second one doesn’t work as well as Tye scores with a superkick and a kind of one knee Codebreaker. They head outside with Corbin charging into the steps but being able to slip out of the Tyebreaker. Corbin throws water into Styles’ face and then throws Corbin into Styles’ chest to win by countout at 2:43 shown.

Post match Corbin says he wants Styles for the title at the pay per view. The match has been made after the break.

Here are Jinder Mahal and the Singh Brothers for a chat. Mahal says he might have went a bit too far last week but gets cut off by a NAKAMURA chant. Of course Nakamura is a worthy opponent and Mahal knows what it was like when Nakamura heard last week’s comments. For the THIRD WEEK IN A FREAKING ROW we do the laughing at Nakamura’s face shtick.

The third one is actually Nakamura though and he’s looking at Mahal right here on Smackdown Live. Cue Nakamura in person (thank goodness) to beat up the Singh Brothers in the aisle but Mahal gets in a few shots of his own. That goes nowhere and it’s Nakamura cleaning house, including Kinshasa to send Mahal sprawling up the ramp.

Usos vs. Hype Bros

New Day is in the front row. Mojo drives some shoulders into Jimmy’s ribs to start but gets kicked down for his efforts. It’s off to Ryder to clean some house, including a neckbreaker for two on Jey. Ryder loads up a missile dropkick but Mojo tags himself in, triggering an argument. Jimmy knocks Ryder off the top and it’s a superkick into the Superfly Splash to end Rawley at 2:17.

Post match the Usos go to yell at New Day, who says the title match will be inside the Cell.

It’s time for Rusev’s Pride of Bulgaria celebration with Aiden English as master of ceremonies and singing the Bulgarian national anthem. Rusev comes out carrying the Bulgarian flag and the Mayor of Rusev’s hometown reads a proclamation as Rusev stands on a platform. He’s presented a key to the city and we see a clip of Rusev beating Randy Orton in nine seconds last week. Rusev talks about the Lion of Bulgaria ripping the fangs from the Viper’s mouth. It’s his jungle now and English sings a special song….until Orton comes in with RKO’s for Rusev and English.

Sami comes in to see Bryan, who says Shane is on the way and wants Owens. Zayn begs Bryan to call Shane off because he wants Owens to himself tonight.

Orton tells Renee Young to tell Rusev that if he wants some payback, come see him at Hell in a Cell.

Charlotte vs. Carmella

Carmella chains Ellsworth to the ring. Charlotte can’t get in an early Figure Eight attempt but can get in a big boot. Ellsworth’s distraction sets up a cheap shot and we take a break. Back with Charlotte fighting out of a chinlock but getting pulled down by the hair. Carmella gets two off a reverse DDT and nails a superkick. Not that it matters though as she walks into a big boot to give Charlotte the pin at 6:55.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here but it was little more than Charlotte getting a win before the pay per view. I really wish they could drop the Briefcase already though as it’s little more than a Sword of Damocles hanging over the title, which really holds back what they have going for it with Charlotte back in the title picture.

Post match Natalya comes out to says he’s glad Ric Flair is feeling better so he can see Charlotte lose.

And then a gong strikes…..because Dolph Ziggler is doing Undertaker’s entrance. The fans seem to buy it at first until Ziggler starts dancing around. Dolph says the fans look like they’ve seen a ghost, which makes him laugh because there’s no way you’re seeing Undertaker twice in a year. Ziggler starts ripping into the fans again but things become GLORIOUS in a hurry.

Bobby Roode comes out to call Ziggler a hypocrite. He claims to not care about what the fans think but here he is every week to entertain them. If Ziggler thinks he’s the best performer ever, how about he proves it against Roode at Hell in a Cell? Ziggler lists off all the things that it takes to be popular here: flashy robe, an entrance that involves audience participation and in-ring skills that match Ziggler’s. Two out of three aren’t bad, but anyone who steps in the ring with Ziggler will REST IN…..and Roode cuts him off to say their match will be GLORIOUS.

Sami Zayn vs. Kevin Owens

They slug it out to start with Owens dropping Sami off a hard shot to the face. The Cannonball has Sami bailing to the floor as it’s all Owens early on. Back in and Sami scores with a clothesline but gets sent outside again. We cut to the back to see Shane arriving as we take a break.

Back with Owens getting two off a superkick but being planted off the tornado DDT. The Helluva Kick is countered with a superkick but Sami grabs the Blue Thunder Bomb for a close two. Owens bails to the floor so Sami scores with the flip dive in a nasty looking crash. The dive through the ropes is blocked by another superkick and the apron bomb crushes Sami all over again. The referee stops the match at 9:40.

Rating: B-. These two are always going to have an entertaining match though there’s only so much you can do when Sami is little more than a sacrificial lamb. If they play their cards right on this feud, they could set up a huge match between Owens and Zayn down the line, assuming of course they don’t give Shane the win due to reasons of general stupidity.

Sami is carried out until Owens decks him again. He wraps a chair around Sami’s neck but cue Shane to charge at Owens. Unfortunately he runs into the chair to knock it into Sami’s throat, allowing Owens to bail into the crowd to end the show. Unless it was off camera, Shane never even checked on Sami.

Overall Rating: C. They built the show up in a hurry tonight and as is usually the case around here, they did it without having too much in-ring action on the show. I like that for the most part as you don’t want to give away anything major with so little time before the pay per view. Shane vs. Owens better deliver though because that’s almost the entire focus of this show.

Results

Baron Corbin b. Tye Dillinger via countout

Usos b. Hype Bros – Superfly Splash to Rawley

Charlotte b. Carmella – Big boot

Kevin Owens b. Sami Zayn via referee stoppage

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Seriously, I don’t need anything for Christmas now.

Monday Night Raw
Date: September 25, 2017
Location: Citizens Business Bank Arena, Ontario, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Corey Graves, Booker T.

We’re past No Mercy and that means we have about a month to go before Tables Ladders and Chairs 2017. That means it’s time to build a card, which doesn’t seem likely to contain Brock Lesnar. It does however include Roman Reigns, who defeated John Cena last night and Braun Strowman, who fell to Lesnar in the Universal Title match. Let’s get to it.

Here’s are the Miz and the Miztourage for MizTV. After a quick look at Miz retaining the Intercontinental Title last night and bragging about his victory, Miz brings out his guest for the evening: Roman Reigns. Miz talks about Reigns’ accomplishments, including retiring Undertaker. Reigns says Cena carried the company for fifteen years and even an idiot like Miz can see that Reigns is the new guy.

That brings Miz to Jason Jordan, who isn’t good enough to be in the ring with him. Reigns disagrees, and says Miz wouldn’t win without the Miztourage. He tells Axel and Dallas to go get him a cold beer but Miz brings up Reigns having help in the form of the Shield. A match between the trios is teased and Reigns gets out of his chair, sending the Miztourage and company to the floor. Cue Kurt Angle to say Miz is facing Reigns tonight, but first the Miztourage will be facing Matt Hardy and Jason Jordan.

Matt Hardy/Jason Jordan vs. Miztourage

Jordan takes Dallas down without too much effort and northern lights Axel for two. It’s off to Matt for a headlock before the Miztourage being cleaned out as we take a break. Back with the Miztourage in control and Axel grabbing a chinlock on Jordan. That goes nowhere as it’s off to Matt for the middle rope elbow to the back of the head. Everything breaks down and Jordan does his running shoulder in the corner, followed by the belly to belly on Axel. The Side Effect into the Twist of Fate puts Dallas away at 10:25.

Rating: D+. Well that happened. What in the world am I supposed to say about this one anyway? Jordan was thrown in there because Jeff was hurt and it’s not like they have any other teams to throw in there. Heath Slater and Rhyno are available but they’re pretty low level, even for something like this. In other words, MAKE SOME NEW TEAMS ALREADY!

Quick video on Lesnar vs. Strowman, trying to make it far less disappointing than it really was.

Elias vs. Apollo Crews

Rematch from last night’s Kickoff Show. Apollo takes him down with a headlock and Elias can’t do much from there. Back up and Crews snaps off a dropkick and a clothesline, drawing a rather hard chant from the fans. Crews dives over the top onto Elias and poses with Titus, only to have Elias kick Titus’ knee out. Back in and Elias runs him over, followed by Drift Away for the pin at 2:42. That was Elias’ only offense.

Titus beats up Elias post match.

Finn Balor thanks Bray Wyatt for pushing him to the limit and says he wants the Universal Title match.

Here’s Curt Hawkins to issue a challenge to end his losing streak.

Braun Strowman vs. Curt Hawkins

Hawkins bails before Strowman gets in the ring so Strowman chases him through the crowd. Curt gets caught without too much effort and a chokeslam puts him through a table. Strowman takes him to the stage and powerslams Hawkins through the LED wall in a big crash. No match of course.

With Hawkins pretty much dead, Strowman goes to the ring and grabs the mic. After last night, he wants a real fight right now. Cue Dean Ambrose with a taped up shoulder to answer the challenge.

Braun Strowman vs. Dean Ambrose

Strowman throws him around to start and drives Dean into the corner. Dean stumbles backwards, slaps him in the face, and then falls down. The running powerslam is countered though as Dean grabs a sleeper. They fall out to the floor with Dean posting him, only to miss a charge back inside. Strowman gets knocked outside and Dean’s suicide dive into a tornado DDT plants him with a loud thud. Back in and a basement dropkick staggers Strowman for two. A missed charge sends Braun into the post but the top rope elbow is countered into the powerslam to give Strowman the pin at 6:32.

Rating: C+. This was fun and a good way to get Strowman back on his feet but for what? Where is Strowman supposed to go from here? He’s fought Reigns already so maybe Balor? Is that the most interesting thing in the world? Not that it really matters as we’re just waiting on Lesnar to return for his title defense at the Rumble anyway, making the whole thing a pretty big waste of time. But hey, Roman vs. Lesnar II right?

Angle is telling the referee for the Miz vs. Reigns match to keep an eye on the Miztourage. Cue Enzo Amore to say he wants a celebration for tonight. Angle doesn’t think so but once he can understand Enzo, he agrees to the idea. This is Enzo’s first title so Angle asks if he’d like some advice from a Hall of Famer. Enzo: “Nah.”

Seth Rollins brings Dean a bag of ice for his shoulder. Dean is still going to be at ringside for Rollins vs. Sheamus later. Seth is going to go request a match with Strowman for next week.

Here’s Alexa Bliss for a chat. She considers all of the fans her friends and she has to be honest with them: she is VERY disappointed with each and every single one of them. This morning she got up and looked at some messages about her title win but everything was about Sasha, Bayley or Asuka. Alexa has cleaned out the entire women’s division but here’s Mickie James to interrupt.

Mickie brings up Alexa insulting her on Raw Talk after last night’s show. Alexa says she’s been watching her since she was a little girl and Mickie was even on her top eight on MySpace. There are still some fans who say Mickie still has it but she’s worried about Mickie breaking a hip. Mickie brags about all the barriers and hearts she’s broken since Alexa was still in a training bra. Mickie: “And that seems to still be working for you.” Alexa calls her an old lady and gets slapped in the face, followed by a superkick for good measure.

Seth Rollins vs. Sheamus

Cesaro, even without the teeth, is here too. Sheamus throws him into the corner to start but gets sent shoulder first into the opposite post for his efforts. That means a suicide dive from Rollins, only to get caught in an Irish Curse back inside. Sheamus bends Seth’s knee around his neck before getting two off a sitout powerbomb. After a Cloverleaf doesn’t get him very far, Sheamus kicks the head out of Rollins’ jaw for two. The Brogue Kick misses though and Rollins grabs the wind-up knee for the pin at 4:12.

Rating: C. This didn’t have time to do much and felt like leftovers from last night’s great match. Rollins winning makes sense when he’s facing Strowman next week, though I’d like to see Rollins get back into the World Title scene. Of course, again, we need a champion around to fight and apparently we can’t do that for a few months now. Eh I’m sure this won’t be a problem whatsoever.

Balor comes up to Goldust, who isn’t cool with Balor taking shots at him. Goldust didn’t ask for nor does he need Balor’s help. Finn apologizes but Goldust hits him in the face and beats him up anyway.

Video on Reigns vs. Cena. After last night’s loss, Cena talked about his role changing in WWE and how much of a weight it felt like was being lifted off his shoulders when he lost. He’s not sure he can continue at this pace and while he’s not done, he’s transitioning.

Miz vs. Roman Reigns

Non-title. Reigns pops him in the jaw to start and knocks Miz outside without too much effort. Miz stays on the floor long enough to get Reigns to chase him, allowing a few shots as he gets back in. An Axel cheap shot lets Miz boot him in the face and we hit a chinlock. Reigns powers out but gets taken down by the Miztourage again.

Back in and Miz scores with the running corner dropkicks but Reigns pulls him out of the air with a Samoan drop. Yet another Miztourage distraction lets Miz get in the running clothesline and the YES Kicks. Reigns has finally had it and punches everyone in the face, setting up the apron dropkick. Axel offers ANOTHER distraction though and Miz’s short DDT is good for two. Not that it matters as Reigns spears him down for the pin at 9:50.

Rating: C. They weren’t exactly hiding what they were going for here and you can see the post-match stuff from here. However, as usual, they have no reason to have Miz job here when they could have just done a DQ. But hey, we can add Miz and the Intercontinental Title to things Reigns has conquered to the same level of reaction. Have I mentioned I’m REALLY not ok with the ending to last night’s match?

Reigns tries to fight off the trio but gets laid out with a chair. The Miztourage goes to leave but comes back for some more shots, including another big one with the chair. They throw in the Shield pose to really make this one clear.

Goldust vs. Finn Balor

Goldust goes straight after him and sends Balor shoulder first into the post. Balor gets dropped onto the barricade and we take a break. Back with Goldust holding a waistlock and kicking Balor in the ribs. Balor kicks him down and stomps away, followed by the Sling Blade and the Coup de Grace for the pin at 7:24.

Rating: D+. This was as good as Finn Balor vs. Goldust was going to be. Not that I’m complaining about seeing Goldust getting some time at this stage in his career but it’s not like there’s any real reason to believe Balor was in any real danger here. Balor needs something to do that isn’t Bray Wyatt but who else is he supposed to feud with at the moment?

Post match Bray’s lights come on and what sounds like a kid sings He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands. Yes, this is actually continuing for whatever reason they have this time.

Bayley and Sasha Banks are in the back before their tag match later. Bayley apologizes for costing her the title last night but says she wants to win it herself. Banks seems cool with that.

Enzo receives a no contract rule for his celebration, saying if any cruiserweight attacks him they can’t have a future title shot. Angle finds him very annoying.

Emma/Nia Jax vs. Bayley/Sasha Banks

Nia and Bayley start things off with the monster knocking Banks off the apron and flattening Bayley with a clothesline. Back from a break with Nia cranking on Bayley’s arm and sitting on it for good measure (Graves: “That won’t just separate your shoulder. That will divorce it!”). Bayley finally kicks Emma away, sending her right into Nia. The hot tag brings in Banks to clean house with some bad dropkicks and a Regal Cutter to Emma. Everything breaks down and Nia gets double teamed on the floor, including a good posting from Bayley. Back in and the Bayley to Belly puts Emma away at 8:35.

Rating: C-. You know, at some point Nia has to actually win something and stop getting taken down every single time. At this point we’re just waiting for Asuka though as she’s going to be a complete game changer for the entire division. The match wasn’t bad or anything but Bayley and Banks vs. Emma isn’t exactly in doubt.

Here’s Enzo for the closing segment. He says that it wasn’t a dream and first of all it’s time to talk about his morning. This morning, he woke up and looked at the title, which made him start reflecting. Over the last few months, there have been more than a cuppa haters. Those people were jealous, just like his former partner Big Cass. From the looks of Cass’ knee, Enzo was the one holding him up. He’s heard the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants and now it’s time to retire his jersey.

Enzo pulls a sheet off a framed Certified G jersey and says that he’s done the impossible by making 205 Live relevant. This brings out the majority of the cruiserweight division and Enzo starts cracking jokes. Rich Swann is a bad dancer, Cedric Alexander is the man that charisma forgot, Gran Metalik has a big gut, Gulak’s gear looks stupid….and here’s Neville to cut him off, again looking like a zombie after he lost the title the last time.

Neville rips on Enzo for making everyone around him miserable. Enzo has been tormenting the entire roster for a year and now he’s been dumped on the cruiserweights’ doorstep. He’s done nothing but make a joke out of everything and now it’s time to pay. Neville charges the ring but Enzo brings up the no contact clause.

Enzo says that this is the first time the cruiserweights have closed the show in the last nine months and it’s because of his star power. He moves more merchandise than all of them combined so he’ll see everyone tomorrow night on the Zo Show. Neville kicks him low and sends him through the jersey. Enzo tries to bail but the division cuts him off so the beating can continue. The contract is put into Enzo’s mouth and Neville superkicks him to applause from his fellow cruiserweights. The Red Arrow ends the show.

Overall Rating: D+. There were some good things on this show but sweet goodness it died in the last hour. That’s been the idea they’ve been trying in the last few weeks and it’s actually not the worst move in the world. People aren’t watching in the last hour so why bother wasting something bit when then audience isn’t around? The lack of a big story is hurting things but I guess we’re using the Shield reunion as a stopgap measure. Let me repeat that: the Shield reunion is a stopgap measure. That should sum up this show’s problem in a nutshell.

Results

Matt Hardy/Jason Jordan b. Miztourage – Twist of Fate to Dallas

Elias b. Apollo Crews – Drift Away

Braun Strowman b. Dean Ambrose – Running powerslam

Seth Rollins b. Sheamus – Wind up knee

Roman Reigns b. Miz – Spear

Finn Balor b. Goldust – Coup de Grace

Sasha Banks/Bayley b. Emma/Nia Jax – Bayley to Belly to Emma

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

No Mercy 2017
Date: September 24, 2017
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T., Corey Graves

I don’t remember being this excited for a B pay per view in a very long time. This show is all about the double main event with a combination of Brock Lesnar defending the Universal Title against Braun Strowman and John Cena vs. Roman Reigns in one heck of a big time match. That should be more than enough to carry this show so let’s get to it.

Kickoff Show: Elias vs. Apollo Crews

No real story here as this was just thrown together for the sake of a Kickoff match. Elias sings a little ditty about Los Angeles but gets cut off by Titus Worldwide and Crews in particular. Elias shoves him away without much effort and grabs a headlock to keep Crews slowed down. An armbar has Elias in some trouble and Crews snaps off a dropkick to take over. Elias sends him to the apron though and knocks Crews outside as we take a break.

Back with Elias still in control until Crews punches him in the ribs and slowly slugs away. Crews fights out of a reverse chinlock and scores with the standing shooting star. An enziguri staggers Elias but he sends Crews into the corner, setting up Drift Away for the pin at 8:54.

Rating: D+. This felt like a long Raw match and to be fair that’s all it was really supposed to be. Apollo losing again doesn’t really do anything that bad for him as it’s not like h had anything going for him anyway. On the other hand you have Elias, who is looking more and more like someone they would like to push every single week. Good outing from Elias but not much of a match.

Elias goes after Crews again but Titus makes a fast save.

The opening video looks at the two main events and talks about how everyone has the potential to show no mercy.

Intercontinental Title: Jason Jordan vs. The Miz

Jordan is challenging after winning a six way on Raw. Miz gets a bit too cocky to start and walks into a series of suplexes for his efforts. A cheap shot to the ribs has Jason in trouble though and a DDT gets two. The dueling WHO’S YOUR DADDY/LET’S GO MIZ chants starts up as Jordan slugs away, only to get sent outside for a breather. Back in and we hit the YES Kicks to Jordan with Cole and Corey arguing over who invented them.

Jordan catches one of them in another suplex and a Saito suplex is good for a near fall. Some rolling northern lights suplexes give Jordan a bridging two and Miz bails outside again. Back in and Jordan slaps on a Crossface for a bit, only to miss the running shoulder in the corner. Another suplex drops Miz and now the shoulder hits but Jordan has to go after Bo Dallas. Curtis Axel gets in a cheap shot though, knocking Jordan into Miz for the Skull Crushing Finale to retain at 10:10.

Rating: C. Jordan’s suplexes looked great but I’m not sure that’s enough to carry him to glory. He really doesn’t have enough of a character to make it work but maybe it just needs another tweak to really start clicking. Miz retaining is the right call as he gets to keep setting himself closer towards the most days with the title.

Post match Jordan says he’s love a rematch and thinks Miz sucks, just like the chants about his father.

Long recap of Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor. Bray targeted Finn for thinking he was a false idol with the Balor Club. Bray beat him on Raw but then lost to the Demon at Summerslam. Now Bray wants to win again to show he can beat Balor himself.

Bray Wyatt vs. Finn Balor

Bray jumps him before the bell and sends Balor into various hard objects. The referees come out to check on Balor and start to take him to the back until Bray says that Balor is a coward who is scared of the monster in front of him. Of course those are fighting words and the brawl is on early. Sister Abigail is broken up and Balor sidesteps a charge to send Bray outside.

Back in and Bray catches him with a superplex to stay on the bad ribs like a good villain should. Finn’s shoulder is sent down into the apron as Bray is picking him apart piece by piece. Bray gets caught in the ring skirt though (That’s still a thing?) and Balor kicks him in the chest. Back in and Balor goes up, only to have Bray do the spider walk to scare the heck out of Finn.

The Sling Blade puts Bray down but he pops back up for a shot to the ribs and the backsplash for two. A double stomp gets Balor out of trouble but he takes too long going up top. Bray pulls him back down and hits a heck of a clothesline for two more. Back to back suplex throws have the ribs in more trouble (good psychological sense) but he takes too long on the ropes too. Balor hits the running corner dropkick and the Coup de Grace is good for the pin at 11:55.

Rating: C+. Better match than their last effort and hopefully this ends their rivalry so Bray can find someone else to beat him up for a change. The match ran into the same trap that so many Wyatt matches run into: I didn’t buy most of his near falls because it felt like we were just waiting around for him to get beaten. They really need to fix that if they want Bray to move forward. Balor on the other hand needs to be in the World Title picture like….oh anytime would be nice.

Asuka debuts at TLC.

Sheamus and Cesaro say they’ll win.

Tag Team Titles: Sheamus/Cesaro vs. Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose

Rollins and Ambrose are defending. Ambrose sends both challengers outside to start but gets run over from behind by Sheamus. Cesaro rams him hard into the steps and comes up (well, he’s still on the ground but you get the idea) holding his arm. Back in and things actually slow down a bit for the referee to check on the arm so you know it’s serious. Cesaro’s boot to the face gets two and he cranks on the arm for good measure.

Dean fights up and sends him into the post though, allowing the hot tag to Rollins so house can be cleaned in a hurry, starting with the springboard clothesline and a catapult into the post. There’s the low superkick as Cesaro is bleeding from the face, due to LOSING BOTH OF HIS FRONT TEETH WHEN HIS HEAD SMACKED INTO THE POST! AND HE’S STILL GOING! Sweet goodness someone get this man a…..what the heck should he get? Sheamus is ticked off (must be a dental enthusiast) and grabs three straight Irish Curses to take Seth down.

It’s back to Cesaro (now less bloody) for a big boot to take Ambrose off the apron. Rollins slugs away anyway and avoids a charge to send Sheamus into the post. One heck of a backdrop sends Cesaro outside and the hot tag brings Dean back in. Ambrose clotheslines Sheamus outside and, while still favoring the arm, hits a suicide dive. Back in and Seth has to save Dean from a double Razor’s Edge, only to have Cesaro kick him to the floor.

That means a Sharpshooter and Crossface for Dean, who somehow makes the ropes. The double Razor’s Edge gets two and Sheamus can’t believe the kickout (fair enough, as that should be a heck of a finisher). With nothing else working, the super White Noise is loaded up but Rollins is there for a hurricanrana….which is blocked through raw power.

Sheamus gives Ambrose the regular White Noise and Cesaro superbombs Rollins onto Dean for the most ludicrous kickout I’ve seen in months. Dean collapses before a Brogue Kick can connect so Sheamus tries again, only to hit Cesaro by mistake. The wind-up knee knocks Sheamus into Dirt Deeds to retain the titles at 15:57.

Rating: B+. Do we still have Isaac Yankem’s business card? I don’t think I need to explain that this was an insanely hard hitting match with both teams beating the fire (and teeth) out of each other. I wasn’t expecting anything coming into this and while the kickouts were ridiculous at times (unfortunately that has to be plural), heck of a performance here and worth checking out.

We recap the Women’s Title match, which is a five way due to trying to throw in everyone they can. Alexa Bliss is defending, Sasha Banks is getting a mandatory rematch, Nia Jax and Emma won a tag match to get here and Bayley is just there because reasons.

Women’s Title: Alexa Bliss vs. Emma vs. Sasha Banks vs. Bayley vs. Nia Jax

Bliss is defending her right to get killed by Asuka. Emma now has new music that starts with “it’s all about me”. Uh, nothing has ever been about you Emma. Bliss and Jax are knocked to the floor without much effort and it’s a rare triple test of strength from the other three. Emma is sent outside as well to give us the big showdown, only to have Nia back in and destroy the mere mortals.

Bliss comes back in and tries her DDT on Jax, who just shrugs it off in a nearly funny moment. Banks tries a save so Nia Samoan drops her and Bliss at the same time, leaving Bayley to dive in for a save. The guillotine choke over the ropes has Nia in trouble so everyone can get together and dump her out. Nia gets right back up and grabs Emma, who slips between her legs and grabs a powerbomb with Bayley helping and Banks and Bliss dropkicking her away from the ropes.

Nia lands ON HER HEAD but thankfully seems to be alive. Back in and Banks hits Rey Mysterio’s sitout bulldog on Emma, followed by the Bank Statement on Bliss. Bayley makes a save and grabs the Bayley to Belly for two of her own. Nia is back up though and starts destroying people again, including a legdrop on Sasha for two. The monster is taken to the floor but Bliss uses the distraction to DDT Bayley and retain the title at 9:59.

Rating: B-. THEN WHY WAS EMMA IN THE FREAKING MATCH??? Of all the people they could have take the fall (and by that I mean of like three), they pick BAYLEY? The one coming back from injury after her horrible run? They have the jobbiest jobber to ever job in Emma and she’s just out there on the floor with the rest of them while Bayley takes the fall? And they wonder why no one buys into her. The other problem here is Nia, who needs to actually win something at some point in her career.

Bliss says she’s a goddess.

Clip from No Mercy 2005 with Batista retaining the Smackdown World Title over Eddie Guerrero.

Long recap of John Cena vs. Roman Reigns. Cena came to Raw to face Reigns and then destroyed him in a series of promos. Reigns talked about Cena leaving for Hollywood and says he needs to win this match to really be the big dog.

John Cena vs. Roman Reigns

Reigns shoulders him down to start, drawing a YOU BOTH SUCK chant. Cena actually gets out of the ring and walks up the ramp (Huh?), allowing Reigns to follow him up and get in a shot to the face to take over again. Some right hands have little effect on Reigns, who drops Cena with a single shot for two. Cena sends him into the steps for a breather but still doesn’t seem to have the killer instinct going yet.

Reigns does the same thing to him, followed by the apron dropkick. The fans aren’t sure who to cheer for here as Reigns gets two. Cena gets in a few right hands but a pair of kicks cut him off again as Cena has still had almost no offense. We hit the chinlock as the announcers are suggesting that Cena is starting to lose his big match skills and the stupid fans chant boring.

Back up and the shoulder block is cut off with an uppercut as Reigns is nailing the heel style. Cena’s finishing sequence is initiated but the Five Knuckle Shuffle is countered with another Samoan drop. The Superman Punch is countered into an STF but Reigns powers out into the sitout powerbomb for two more. Cena powers up again and hits the AA for two on a very near fall that I almost bought.

The top rope Fameasser is countered with a not great powerbomb for two and another Superman Punch gets another near fall. Back up and Reigns’ spear hits the post (CHECK HIS TEETH! CHECK HIS TEETH!) so Cena grabs the super AA for another very close two that I bought more than the standard version.

With nothing else working, Cena loads up the announcers’ tables but his third AA is countered into a spear through the table, though Cena kind of countered it with a DDT. Fans: “YOU STILL SUCK!” That’s only good for two back inside but another spear is countered into rolling AA’s for a two that I didn’t buy as much this time around. Another Superman Punch and another spear gives Reigns the pin at 21:48. Cole: “This may be the biggest win of Reigns’ career!” No Cole. No.

Rating: B. Yeah this didn’t really work like it was supposed to and the spamming of finishers was laughable at the ending. The fact that I bought the first AA, really bought the second AA, and didn’t buy the rolling AA’s tells you all you need to know. This was supposed to be some big win that made Reigns but he’s main evented THREE WRESTLEMANIAS IN A ROW. Excuse me if I’m not thrilled with Reigns winning the co-main event of a B show. It’s a big win, but this wasn’t anything close to the level of epic they were hoping for.

Cena raises Reigns’ hand and sits in the corner after Reigns leaves. The fans applaud and give him a THANK YOU CENA chant because they’re acting like he’s retiring for some reason. Cena goes to the ramp, turns around and salutes before leaving.

Miz tells Kurt Angle he wants a special MizTV with Roman Reigns tomorrow night because that win was the same as retiring the Undertaker. Angle agrees and says it’s opening the show. Translation: PLEASE DON’T WATCH MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL!

Cruiserweight Title: Enzo Amore vs. Neville

Enzo is challenging and comes out dressed like Beetlejuice. Before the match, Enzo runs his mouth about taking the king’s queen (Enzo: “What is a king without a queen?” Still a king you buffoon.) and something about cookie dough. Neville wristlocks him to start and takes Enzo down with a front facelock. A backflip out of trouble just earns Enzo a kick to the leg as Neville doesn’t seem to be sweating this one too much.

Neville sends him head first into the corner and stomps away, followed by a sliding kick to the head. All champ so far and you can feel the screwy ending coming. One heck of a superkick drops Enzo again and more kicks have him reeling. Neville goes up but takes too long jawing at the fans for the Phoenix splash. The DDG gets a close two on the champ but he throws Enzo outside and over the barricade. With the referee at nine, Enzo holds up the title and dives back in. The referee takes it away, allowing Enzo to hit a low blow for the pin and the title at 9:43.

Rating: F. Enzo Amore is Cruiserweight Champion. This is a failure.

D for those of you who are picky about this kind of stuff. It was a squash with a screwy finish.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. Braun Strowman, which is going to be a big collision. Strowman is the biggest monster that Lesnar has ever faced and he might not be enough of a beast to conquer him.

Universal Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Braun Strowman

Strowman is challenging. Brock gets shoved down to start and a takedown attempt is shoved away. The first German suplex is no sold and Brock gets chokeslammed (Graves: “CHOKESLAM CITY BROCK!”). Braun’s running powerslam only gets two and Heyman is panicking. An elbow and headbutt block another German suplex attempt and Brock’s back gives out on an F5 attempt.

Braun posts him and sends Brock hard into the corner, only to miss a charge. Strowman gets caught in the Kimura and despite Braun grabbing the ropes four times, he settles for a spinebuster to break the hold. It’s Suplex City time with numbers two thru six having Strowman in trouble and Lesnar in a puddle of sweat. The F5 doesn’t work though and a second running powerslam plants Lesnar. A third only gets two on Brock as the fans aren’t reacting to these near falls. Back up and the F5 retains the title out of nowhere at 8:58.

Rating: D. Well that was garbage. They had something going in the first few minutes but Brock just shrugged everything off and hit the F5 to retain. You know, likely because we need Reigns vs. Lesnar II in New Orleans. Braun made one big mistake coming into this match: he got himself over when he wasn’t supposed to and WWE isn’t changing their plans for anyone, especially if the World Title is involved.

Overall Rating: B. That was a heck of a surprise as everything I was looking forward to was either disappointing or just bad and almost everything that I wasn’t interested in was good stuff. Reigns vs. Cena was certainly entertaining though nowhere near as big as WWE thinks it was. Strowman vs. Lesnar….yeah we all bought into the false hope that we’re getting ANYTHING other than Reigns vs. Lesnar II in New Orleans. It’s a shame, but I can’t really say I’m surprised. Disappointed, but not surprised.

The rest of the show was actually very good with the low point being…..I guess Balor vs. Wyatt? I had a good time with this show, even if it was for the polar opposite reason I was expecting to. Still though, it’s one of the better B shows they’ve done in a long time and the good stuff at the beginning more than makes up for the lackluster main event.

Of course nothing makes up for Enzo winning. That’s a wound that will never heal.

Results

The Miz b. Jason Jordan – Skull Crushing Finale

Finn Balor b. Bray Wyatt – Coup de Grace

Seth Rollins/Dean Ambrose b. Cesaro/Sheamus – Dirty Deeds to Sheamus

Alexa Bliss b. Bayley, Nia Jax, Emma and Sasha Banks – DDT to Bayley

Roman Reigns b. John Cena – Spear

Enzo Amore b. Neville – Low blow

Brock Lesnar b. Braun Strowman – F5

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Backlash 2003
Date: April 27, 2003
Location: Worcester Centrum, Worcester, Massachusetts
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz, Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

If WWE held the least important pay per view in recent memory, does it matter in the slightest? This is a glorified Raw pay per view with a handful of Smackdown matches thrown in to fill out the card. It’s a really bad time for WWE at the moment and I don’t remember looking forward to a pay per view less than this one in a long time. Let’s get to it.

The opening video looks at Rock vs. Goldberg, which is billed as a dream match (fair enough) but the build really hasn’t done it any favors. No other matches are mentioned.

As a side note: Scott Steiner beat Rico in the dark match. I know you hear about how big of a collapse his WWE run was but my goodness I never realized it was this bad.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros

Eddie and Chavo are challenging. Team Angle brings out a framed picture of Kurt, complete with medals hanging off the corner. Haas starts with Eddie with the champ getting rolled up a few times for some early near falls. It’s off to Chavo, who stops to lay over the top rope for a bit of fun.

Benjamin comes in as well and Chavo actually wrestles him down, which only seems to give Benjamin a bit more of a serious look. A knee to the back slows Chavo down but Eddie gets in one of his own to keep Benjamin in trouble. What’s good for the champ is good for the Guerrero perhaps? Eddie gets in a few cheap shots on the floor and puts something into his boot. The slingshot hilo gets two as this has been all Guerreros to start.

For some reason Eddie lets Shelton tag out and some choking from the apron lets the champs take over. Shelton does the jump over Haas spot for two before slapping on one of his own. A powerslam sets up another chinlock as the match has slowed considerably. Haas comes in to stay on the back but a few kicks to the head allow Eddie to make the hot tag.

Heel miscommunication puts both champs in the corner but Shelton gives Chavo a good looking powerbomb. Eddie is right back in with Three Amigos to Charlie and Chavo gets a very near fall. A great looking frog splash crushes Haas so Chavo can get two more with Shelton making the last minute (perhaps post last minute) save. Chavo tries a suplex but it’s the Bobby Heenan Wrestlemania V finish with Shelton holding his foot so Haas can get the pin to retain the titles.

Rating: B-. Good choice for an opener here with the mostly fast paced action and a few hot near falls near the end. They got some time to make this work as well and it was a better match as a result. Eddie and Chavo will be fine as they’re so smooth in the ring that they can make almost anyone look better than they can on their own.

Post match, Los Guerreros jump the champs and steal the belts, leaving in a great looking green car.

Torrie Wilson tells Test to stop calling her but he keeps hitting on her anyway. Test calls her a tease for being in Playboy and insists that she wants him. Being a human, Torrie says no because A, he’s Test and B, she’s Stacy Keibler’s friend. Torrie goes to leave but Test pulls her back and kisses her. She storms off as Sable looks on with a rather evil smile. This storyline just went from stupid to REALLY bad n near record time.

Before the next match, here’s Roddy Piper with a basket full of coconuts. Piper: “I have a loverly bunch of coconuts.” He introduces Sean O’Haire and promises that he’ll teach Rikishi that everyone pays the piper. When purchasing coconuts perhaps?

Sean O’Haire vs. Rikishi

Rikishi wins a slugout on the floor to start and throws O’Haire inside for the opening bell. An early Samoan drop gets no cover as Rikishi has to go after Piper, allowing Sean to get in a superkick. We hit the neck crank with some kicks to the back thrown in for good measure. The fans keep booing something in the crowd as Rikishi fights up and splashes O’Haire in the corner.

Sean pretty easily kicks away the Stinkface as Piper gets inside with the coconut. That goes nowhere as a double superkick puts both guys down. Piper comes in again but gets coconutted to the head. The distraction is enough for O’Haire to hit the reverse Death Valley Driver for the pin.

Rating: D-. Terrible match of course but points for putting someone young over. I know the focus is on Piper (not a surprise) but at least they’re trying to push someone fresh. I’d come up with something other than the Snuka vs. Piper feud from twenty years ago, though at least they don’t have Snuka getting back in the ring. Yet at least.

Sable tells Stacy that Torrie kissed Test and even gave him the advance copy of Playboy a few weeks ago. I’ve started typing a few different things about how stupid this is but I think it speaks for itself. I mean…..Eugene was presented as ten times smarter than Stacy in this segment.

Rob Van Dam likes being a champion but says it doesn’t matter what happens tonight because Chief Morely (guest referee, as announced on Heat) won’t let he and Kane retain. Kane says they’ll take everyone down with them.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Rob Van Dam/Kane vs. Dudley Boyz

The Dudleys are defending and Morely is guest referee. Bubba jumps Van Dam from behind to start but a quick leg trip gets him out of trouble. A standoff slows things down but more importantly allows Van Dam to hit that signature pose. Bubba drops him with a right hand and does the same pose to a rather negative reaction. It’s off to D-Von vs. Kane as this is already feeling like a glorified Raw match. The abundant amount of empty chairs would seem to back up that theory.

A big boot gives Kane two and it’s back to Bubba to change things up a bit. The fans want tables but have to settle for Kane getting two off a spinebuster instead. Morely hasn’t been much of a factor so far. Van Dam’s split legged moonsault is good for two but it’s time for some good old fashioned cheating. D-Von comes in sans tag to draw Kane in as well, meaning Van Dam has to take What’s Up.

It’s off to a chinlock and Bubba actually comes in with a basement dropkick. Rob finally gets in a kick to the face and the hot tag brings in Kane. Everything breaks down and it’s Rob’s top rope kick to D-Von’s face. Rolling Thunder hits Bubba but Kane comes back in with the top rope clothesline to D-Von.

Morely finally does something by hitting Kane low but a second swing hits Bubba in the jaw by mistake. That’s enough for D-Von who beats on Morely but Lance Storm comes in with a springboard clothesline. Bubba dispatches Lance without too much effort and it’s a 3D to Morely. Kane grabs a chokeslam on Bubba and the Five Star is enough for the pin from another referee.

Rating: C-. Overbooking aside, this wasn’t half bad but it was really just a longer version of what they do on Raw most of the time. The story is out of gas at this point and unfortunately that ending is likely to see it continue for whatever reason. The division needs more teams and hopefully the evil French guys can help out a bit.

Since this story hasn’t gone on long enough, Stacy goes to see Torrie, who says Test kissed her. Stacy doesn’t buy it and a cat fight is on. I have no idea why most of these women are here when they’re not on the card, nor why Ivory is in a towel despite not having a match.

Women’s Title: Jazz vs. Trish Stratus

Trish is defending and comes in banged up. We get a staredown early on until Trish actually takes her down without too much effort. A backbreaker gets Jazz out of trouble and we hit the double chickenwing. Trish gets thrown down by the hair and Jazz sits on her ribs for good measure. The comeback is short lived as Trish charges into a boot in the corner and the Stratusphere is countered into something like a super Styles Clash.

Jazz goes with a weak half crab but Trish reverses into the full thing. The Chick Kick gets two and Stratusfaction gets the same with Teddy Long throwing in a shoe (make your own Austin Powers joke) for the save. The referee believes that Teddy didn’t do it, despite the fact that HE’S ONLY WEARING ONE SHOE! Trish tries a sunset flip but Jazz sits down on it and grabs the rope for the pin and the title.

Rating: C+. Rather solid match with a finish that felt like it belonged in the NWA. Above all else though they both looked comfortable out there, which is a big step up from most of the women around this company. Good little match here and the finish should hopefully help set up some fresh challengers for the title in the not so distant future.

Booker, Shawn and Nash agree to trust each other but Nash wants HHH for himself. Well they would be the only ones to want that match.

We recap Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio, which is entirely built around a single 619 that knocked Show down. For some reason, this warrants a pay per view match.

Big Show vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey trips him down to start and Show is annoyed again, earning Mysterio a toss into the corner. One of the hardest chops you’ll ever see or hear has Rey’s eyes bugging out of the mask and he rolls outside. Back in and Show stands on the chest for a bit until Rey slips out of a gorilla press. Some right hands stagger Show but Rey heads outside again, this time for a chair. The referee is conveniently knocked away so Mysterio can get in a chair shot, followed by the springboard seated senton for two. A 619 to the leg sets up a 619 to the face but the West Coast Pop is countered into the chokeslam to give Show the pin.

Rating: D-. Well that happened. I have no idea why this needed to be on pay per view as they could have either done the exact same thing on Smackdown or had Mysterio face Matt Hardy for the Cruiserweight Title here. But no, the solution was to give Big Show a squash win, likely so he can have a big match next month. And of course Mysterio is the only person you can put in here against him because you can’t have show win a competitive match against a name of equal value (Benoit would have been a better choice). Putting this on pay per view in this form was ridiculous and more booking that makes my head hurt.

Mysterio does a stretcher job but Show picks him up and swings the backboard (with Rey still attached) against the post. Just in case you didn’t get the entire idea from the match you see. The bump looked great though.

HHH, Ric Flair and Chris Jericho are ready for the wholesome trio tonight.

Torrie and Stacy get in another fight until Scott Steiner saves Stacy. Test FINALLY returns to yell at Steiner for carry Stacy to the trainer.

We recap Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena. Lesnar won the title at Wrestlemania and Cena has been calling him out both before and since the title win. Cena then won a tournament to earn the shot so it’s an actually well built match. Unfortunately it’s also the biggest match on the Smackdown side and feels like a slightly glorified TV main event.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. John Cena

Cena comes out in a Yankees jersey which must have his skin crawling. His rap talks about how he’s going to be added to the list of great champions, meaning he’s crazy like Mankind and coming at you from so many angles that you’ll call him Kurt. Cena jumps him at the bell and slugs away but you can only do that for so long against Brock. Two backbreakers into a fall away slam has Cena in trouble and Brock at the cut on his forehead from Smackdown.

A front facelock keeps Cena in trouble as Tazz goes into his rare yet useful explanation of how to get out of a hold. Brock stomps away in the corner and there’s a gorilla press for good measure. Cena wisely bails out to the floor and grabs a chair but settles for throwing Lesnar into the steps instead. The cut is busted open so Cena slugs away back inside. A running shoulder sends Lesnar to the apron and there’s the middle rope Fameasser to put him fully outside.

Back in and we hit a chinlock for a good while before a DDT gives Cena two. Lesnar grabs a spinebuster to put both guys down for a breather as Cole starts talking about momentum. Tazz thinks whoever is up first might have the advantage. Thanks for that analysis there buddy. Cena is back up with a chinlock and a bodyscissors for a rather long while.

Back up and Cena gets driven into the corner for the break and it’s comeback time. Some clotheslines and a powerslam give Lesnar two. Cena is smart enough to almost send Lesnar into the referee, allowing John to hit a low blow for two more. It’s chain time but a quick F5 retains the title.

Rating: C-. Pretty watchable match (save for that long chinlock) but there was no hiding the fact that Cena was in way over his head and had almost no chance to win the title. Lesnar did what he could and sold a lot, though there’s only so much you can do when the ending is never in doubt. Cena would have his day of course but it just wasn’t here yet.

We recap the six man tag, which was all about who is Nash’s best friend. In other words, it’s a story that all of five people are interested in and for some reason we have to do this six man tag instead of HHH vs. Booker T. II here and Nash doing his hair somewhere instead. This is little more than a pit stop before Nash gets his big singles title match that isn’t interest in and no one wants to see anyway. This gets the music video treatment because it’s the big match in the eyes of the people who matter the most around here.

Kevin Nash/Shawn Michaels/Booker T. vs. HHH/Ric Flair/Chris Jericho

Nash wants to start with HHH but thankfully we do Shawn vs. Jericho instead. Jericho punches away in the corner but Shawn speeds things up and starts a pinfall reversal sequence. A Walls attempt is broken up and it’s off to Nash to hammer on the arm. Jericho skins the cat (I still want to know how it got that name) but Nash is smart enough to be right there with a big boot.

It’s off to Booker, who scores with a kick to HHH’s jaw, only to get caught in the facebuster. The spinebuster puts Booker down and it’s off to Flair for the old school portion. Shawn comes in off a missed elbow drop and house is quickly cleaned. Sweet Chin Music connects but HHH is right there with a Pedigree for the save. HHH and Flair take turns beating on Shawn until it’s off to Jericho for a hard belly to back.

Now the villains start in on the knee but an enziguri puts Flair down. That’s enough for the hot tag to Nash and we get the showdown with HHH. I’m sure the fans are all going to start cheering as soon as the shock wears off so ignore that silence thing. Snake Eyes and the side slam are good for two on HHH with Flair making the save. The chops have no effect with Nash fixing his hair while Ric fires them off.

Everything breaks down and Booker ax kicks Jericho to set up the Spinarooni. Sweet Chin Music is broken up and Flair grabs the Figure Four as Nash loads up the announcers’ table. He comes in for the save instead (how nice of him) but shoves Flair into the referee. The sledgehammer to the head puts Nash away.

Rating: D. So yeah, instead of doing HHH vs. Booker and Shawn vs. Jericho or Flair, we’re stuck with HHH beating Nash to likely set up HHH vs. Nash for the title. As usual, 2003 makes my head hurt and somehow we’re not even close to done with this story. The match wasn’t the worst by any stretch but sweet goodness it was boring and not the way to make me want to see anything else on Raw.

We look back at Mysterio being destroyed in case you didn’t get the idea the first time.

The update on Rey: there is no update.

Long recap of Rock vs. Goldberg, which doesn’t really have much of a story. Rock is coming off beating Steve Austin at Wrestlemania and Goldberg just showed up to attack him. The match was agreed to and Goldberg has been chasing him since. It’s basically Rock being a huge star and someone getting to beat him before he heads to Hollywood permanently.

Rock says he’ll win and doesn’t care much about Goldberg. This felt like nothing but the time filler that it was. The fans chant for Rock all over again.

The Rock vs. Goldberg

The entrances take a long time and Rock hits the floor before the bell as they’re hitting the stall button hard here. They stare each other down as the match hasn’t actually started yet. We’re finally ready to go after several minutes of killing time, which isn’t what this show needed. Goldberg shoves him away off the lockup, which isn’t that surprising as Rock isn’t known as a power guy.

They do it again with Rock falling to the floor this time around. Back in and Rock slaps him in the face, only to get run over with a shoulder. Rock bails again as the announcers debate music. We hit another long stall until Rock snaps him throat first across the top. Goldberg grabs a Rock Bottom but takes way too long on the spear, allowing Rock to send him into the post. The Sharpshooter goes on for a bit before Rock goes with a low blow.

That means nothing either and it’s a spear to cut Rock down. No Jackhammer though as Goldberg gets two off a slam instead. Good grief END THIS SHOW ALREADY. Rock hits a spear of his own (called a spinebuster by Coach, which isn’t that far off actually) and the Rock Bottom gets two. Now the spinebuster actually connects and the People’s Elbow gets two more. Goldberg pops up, hits a spear, ignores the GOLDBERG SUCKS chant, adds a second spear, and finishes with the Jackhammer.

Rating: D-. This was about as dumb as they could have gone with Goldberg doing the same kind of match that every WWE main eventer has with the multiple finishers and trading moves instead of doing the formula that got him over in the first place. It was a completely terrible debut match with Rock’s selling alone completely outshining everything Goldberg did.

Compare this Goldberg match to his recent return (true story: he wrestled more in this match than in a match, a Royal Rumble appearance, a title win and a title defense) and look at which got better reactions, more entertaining matches and just more success overall. It’s not hard to figure out why one was better than the other and a lot of it has to do with booking Goldberg like Goldberg and not like any other star.

Overall Rating: F. The problem here is much more based around this show not being necessary, at least not in this form. The Smackdown stuff was completely unnecessary with most of the blue matches being TV worthy at best and horrible at worst. If you can’t even fit Chris Benoit, Matt Hardy and Undertaker on the show (yet there was time for FOUR Stacy/Test/Torrie segments), just cut the Smackdown part out and let it be a Raw pay per view. Turn the six man into HHH vs. Booker II for the title and do Shawn vs. Jericho II with Jericho getting his win back while Nash is guest enforcer or something.

Then there’s the show itself, which peaked at a just somewhat above average Team Angle vs. Los Guerreros opener. The wrestling was terrible throughout with matches either not needing to exist or being so uninteresting that there was no reason to care about them. This show felt like it was running overtime and didn’t even make it to two hours and forty five minutes. It was an awful show which could have either been a standalone Raw show or just not existed and I don’t think anyone would have really noticed. Just awful stuff all around and a really bad sign of things to come.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: April 24, 2003
Location: Gaylord Entertainment Center, Nashville, Tennessee
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the go home show for Backlash and we have a Smackdown main event. This time around it’s going to be rookie upstart John Cena challenging Brock Lesnar for the Smackdown World Title, meaning it’s likely time for a big face to face showdown. Other than that it’s Rikishi vs. Roddy Piper tonight for reasons I don’t even want to begin to understand. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

The announcers preview the show with Cole making sure to say that “we are just 72 hours away, three days, from Backlash”. I have that 72 hours, three days thing burned into my head after hearing Cole say it all those years.

John Cena vs. Rhyno

Before the match, Cena raps his history, which basically summarizes the tournament and says he’s winning on Sunday. He also promises graphic footage to prove that Lesnar shouldn’t be champion. Rhyno wins the early power battle and sends him outside, only to get dropkicked on the way back inside.

A middle rope Fameasser with Rhyno draped over the ropes has Rhyno in trouble and it’s time to start in on the neck. Back in and we hit the armbar for a good bit until Rhyno fights up with a powerslam. The still yet to be named Throwback sets up the ProtoBomb but Rhyno catches him in a spinebuster. The Gore misses though and Cena rolls him up for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a power match here and I kind of like the idea of Cena making a power guy miss a catch him on a quick pin as it gives him another option to take the title from Lesnar. Unfortunately it wasn’t a great match in the first place, but at least Cena won and beat someone that the fans still care about.

Mr. America is coming.

The FBI annoys Chris Benoit for losing last week when they had a bet on him. They want their money back but Nunzio winds up with a match against Benoit instead.

Sable flaunts her body to Josh Matthews and hypes up the Sable Invitational body contest later tonight.

Some wrestlers toured a Navy ship earlier this week.

Chris Benoit vs. Nunzio

Stamboli and Palumbo get in some shots from behind while Nunzio has the referee. As usual the referee has no issue with Benoit being down despite his opponent not touching him and doesn’t even yell at the other Italians. They trade some chops with the Canadian getting the better of it (well duh) but Palumbo trips Benoit again. The Sicilian Slice (middle rope Fameasser) gives Nunzio two and a swinging neckbreaker is good for the same. An enziguri finally gets Benoit out of trouble and grabs the rolling German suplexes. Nunzio pops up but the springboard armbar is countered into the Crossface for the tap.

Rating: D. I’m hoping they pull the plug on the FBI thing in the very near future as it’s just not interesting. Nunzio is the best worker of the team and even he’s only decent. On top of that, it’s such a simple and not very interesting idea. They’re just stereotypical mob thugs and that’s far from good enough to survive. At least Benoit won though.

Benoit gets beaten down post match.

Tajiri and Funaki watch Rey Mysterio 619 Big Show last week and have a hearty laugh. Cue Big Show to destroy the TV and VCR to blow off some steam.

Rey Mysterio vs. Crash

Crash is now an MF’er, meaning a follower of Matt Hardy, who only uses low fat salad dressings. Tazz dubs Crash a Moore-On as he’s working his way up to MF’er. Rey dropkicks Shannon to the floor but gets armbarred for his efforts. The sitout bulldog is countered with a belly to back suplex (Crash is the first person to come up with that counter?) but the kickouts frustrate Crash. Now the bulldog works fine and the springboard seated senton sets up a tornado DDT to give Rey two. The 619 sets up the springboard legdrop to put Crash away.

Rating: D+. I’m not sure how this is supposed to help Rey get ready for Big Show on Sunday. Crash doesn’t exactly fit the mold for a goon as he wrestled his usual not great match here without looking like anything more than a bad wrestler. This should be setting up Rey vs. Matt but it’s Rey vs. Big Show for reasons I don’t understand.

Cena gives A-Train a pep talk and shows him Lesnar giving him a very scary F5 that saw A-Train landing on his head. That was edited off the actual broadcast if you don’t remember seeing it. A-Train wants to end Lesnar.

Rikishi vs. Roddy Piper

Unfortunately Piper wrestles (work with me here) with his shirt off and the blinded referee doesn’t see Sean O’Haire hit a low blow. Some right hands knock Piper backwards and Sean takes a few of his own but O’Haire comes in to break up the Stinkface for the DQ.

O’Haire beats him down even more and adds the reverse Death Valley Driver.

The evil French guys (now officially La Resistance) are still coming.

It’s time for Sable’s body contest. Before anyone comes out, Sable says this is designed to see if anyone can be as sexy as Torrie. However, Torrie won’t be here tonight because she’s feeling a bit fat lately as she hasn’t been able to get to the gym with all the Playboy stuff. Nidia and Dawn Marie come out and are about to do their thing until Torrie comes out, as expected.

Nidia and Dawn do their thing and get their standard reactions. It’s time for Torrie, who hits on Sable, giving her kind of a standing lap dance, complete with lollipop, and….loses anyway. The beatdown is on and Torrie is left laying as this story is now more confusing than anything else. So Sable is now a lesbian cougar who didn’t interest Torrie but now Torrie is interested (or just playing the proverbial “mind games”) but Sable isn’t interested? Is that where we are?

Chavo Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Team Angle is dedicating their win on Sunday to Kurt. Shelton takes him down without too much effort but lets Chavo up pretty quickly. Chavo scores with a dropkick and a clothesline as Tazz thinks Eddie stole money from him. Why were Los Guerreros never accused of stealing the FBI’s money a few weeks back? It’s kind of their thing to do.

Chavo’s hurricanrana gets two but he walks into a belly to belly for the same. A quickly broken camel clutch doesn’t do Shelton much good as Chavo grabs a flapjack. An STF that John Cena would think looks bad has Shelton in trouble but Charlie Haas pulls him over to the rope. The referee yells at Eddie for going after Haas, allowing Charlie to turn over a rollup and give Shelton the pin.

Rating: C-. They tried to put a bit too much into this and it wasn’t as good as I was expecting. At least they actually set up something for Sunday as that hasn’t seemed to be the case for most of the night. Chavo is the weaker of the team but he’s certainly capable of having a good match. There was a bit too much interference to let that work here though and it was kind of a mess as a result.

Cena talks trash to Lesnar.

Big Show vs. Tajiri

Show catches him without much trouble and a clothesline cuts off the kicks. A charge misses and Show crotches himself, allowing Tajiri to fire off more kicks. Show’s kick drops Tajiri again but here’s Mysterio’s music for a distraction. Not that it matters as the chokeslam plants Tajiri. Cue Rey in person to post Show, drawing a countout.

Rating: D-. So let me make sure I’ve got this straight: Show has been humiliated twice in a row and is likely to squash Mysterio on Sunday, Rey is little more than a fly who is going to be swatted in the actual match, Tajiri gets treated like a jobber and Mysterio/Tajiri beating Team Angle to start the whole thing meant nothing at all. If someone would be interested in pointing out a positive in this whole mess, please let me know.

Stephanie McMahon is bent over a table for no apparent reason other than she probably thought she looked good that day (granted she’s not wrong). She’s an All-American girl and is happy to have Mr. America here next week.

Backlash rundown.

Brock Lesnar vs. A-Train

Non-title with Cena on commentary. Lesnar’s pyro when he jumps to the apron seems to shake Cena, which you don’t see very often. Joined in progress after a break with an exchange of power shoves. We hit a front facelock with Brock rolling A-Train around like he’s not even there. Back up and a big collision puts both of them down and it’s another staredown.

Brock finally gets a more definitive advantage by clotheslining A-Train to the floor, allowing Cena to trash talk even more. The distraction lets A-Train kick him in the face to take over, followed by the chinlock. Brock fights up but gets puts right back down with a hard shoulder. A powerslam works a bit better for Lesnar, only to have A-Train grab the Derailer for two. Cena: “WHAT’S UP WITH CHIODA DOG??? WAY OUT OF POSITION!” The F5 plants A-Train a few seconds later but Cena comes in for the DQ.

Rating: D. Slow, plodding power match here with an obvious and dull ending. Lesnar winning is fine and A-Train got in some big shots despite having no change to win. There’s no hiding the fact that Lesnar vs. Cena is the only Smackdown match that matters on Sunday but it’s looking like little more than a glorified squash. Bad main event to a bad show.

Cena chains Lesnar in the head and hits the Death Valley Driver (now the standard AA). A belt shot to Lesnar’s head ends the show.

Overall Rating: F+. The best thing on the show was a lackluster Chavo vs. Shelton match as it’s clear that the Smackdown side of Backlash means absolutely nothing. Brock vs. Cena is the distant third biggest match on the pay per view card and everything else is complete filler. This show did nothing to shake that idea as the whole thing was Lesnar vs. Cena and everything else, none of which was interesting in the slightest. It was a terrible show and another part of a horrid stretch for the brand.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event
Date: September 21, 2017
Location: SAP Center, San Jose, California
Commentators: Nigel McGuinness, Vic Joseph

It’s time to get ready for No Mercy and that means the big hype for the two main events. This week is one of the biggest cards for a B show in company history and that means we might be in for a special night on Sunday. Therefore, you can pretty much guess what we’ll be seeing on this show. Let’s get to it.

In memory of Bobby Heenan.

Opening sequence, still featuring a bunch of people who will never be on this show.

Heath Slater vs. Dash Wilder

Heath is introduced as “one half of the tag team of Rhyno and Heath Slater.” That’s quite formal no? Hang on a second as Slater has to remove the shirt, which Wilder takes and declares himself to be the daddy. Slater grabs an armbar to start but gets his head taken off by a hard clothesline. Wilder slugs him down without much effort and puts on a headlock to keep things slow. Back up and Slater scores with the side kick, followed by a running neckbreaker for two. Wilder gets the same off a powerslam, only to have Heath slip out of a suplex and hit Sweetness (implant DDT) for the pin at 5:24.

Rating: C. Slater is still a perfectly fine choice for an opening act like this and there’s nothing wrong with that. The fans love him and he’s not hurting anything by beating a tag wrestler whose partner is on the shelf. Slater doesn’t have much of a singles resume but it’s better than Wilder’s, who has barely ever done any singles work.

From Raw for the first time.

Alexa Bliss vs. Nia Jax

Non-title. Alexa bails to the floor to start before completely failing at a waistlock. Nia chokes her a bit and Bliss goes up the ramp, only to be cut off by Sasha Banks. Jax runs Bliss over again and we take a break. Back with Nia going shoulder first into the post and a dropkick staggering her again. Bliss’ high crossbody gets countered into a Samoan drop for the pin at 6:39. Not enough to rate but this was a squash. I’m not wild on a champion being pinned clean but it fights the story perfectly in this case and is a lot more acceptable.

Sasha comes in and gets tossed down as well. Cue the returning Bayley (hometown girl) to help Sasha and Alexa clear Jax to the floor. Bliss celebrates with them and gets beaten down as well. Sasha and Bayley celebrate a bit.

Long video on Braun Strowman vs. Brock Lesnar.

It’s Hispanic Heritage Month (and they only took two weeks to start talking about it) so here’s a video on Rey Mysterio. Makes more sense than the Jennifer Lopez one on Raw.

Mustafa Ali/Lince Dorado vs. Tony Nese/Ariya Daivari

Nese shows off the bicep to start but still manages to send Dorado into the buckle a few times. That’s some pretty bad technicoing. Dorado hits his Lionsault press for two and a hurricanrana puts Nese down again. A double flapjack does the same to Daivari so the villains hit the floor and bail before the double dives can hit. We take a break and come back with Daivari clotheslining the heck out of Dorado to take over.

There’s a double suplex for two and it’s Nese grabbing a bodyscissors to keep Dorado down. The handspring Stunner finally gets Dorado out of trouble and the hot tag brings in Ali for his usual stuff. The rolling neckbreaker out of the corner gets two, followed by a moonsault using Dorado as a springboard. Back in and the tornado DDT plants Daivari, followed by the 054 for the pin at 11:20.

Rating: C+. These matches might be a bit repetitive but they’re always at least somewhat fun. The cruiserweights fly all over the place and put on a heck of a show, which is all you can ask for in a ten minute match. These things aren’t designed to do anything more than entertain and that’s what they’re doing here.

We’ll wrap it up here.

Here’s Roman Reigns for a chat as this show is allergic to actual wrestling. Reigns gets booed but he thinks this should get booed anyway. Some people think Cena is the best talker of all time but sometimes he says some stupid s***. People have been talking about Reigns being the next Cena but he’s not a white guy with a military crew cut. If he was, he wouldn’t have a job here. If you don’t believe that, just ask Alex Riley.

Reigns calls Cena a fake guy and shows us a clip from five years ago with Cena talking about Rock being a part timer who keeps bailing to Hollywood. Reigns asks if Cena should come out here and brings up the loss to Rock at Wrestlemania. Roman will see San Jose next time and says he’ll see Cena on Sunday, movie star. This was FAR better from Reigns as he actually made a point and told a story (Reigns is the guy that Cena claimed to be and actually backs it up by being here) while also not having Cena (a far better talker than Reigns could ever hope to be) cutting him down every few seconds.

Overall Rating: C+. Another good show here as I’m actually fired up for Sunday’s double main event. I could easily see either match closing the show and that makes for an interesting way to run a pay per view. The wrestling here was fine but there’s no pretending that this was anything more than a last minute push towards the pay per view, as it should be.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

205 Live
Date: September 19, 2017
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness

It’s the go home show for No Mercy and its one cruiserweight match. As usual it’s for the Cruiserweight Title and as usual it’s Neville defending the title. This time it’s against Enzo Amore and they’ll be going face to face tonight. Other than that we have the fallout from Jack Gallagher turning heel to join Brian Kendrick last week. Let’s get to it.

We look at Enzo’s debut and rise to the top of 205 Live, despite the fans starting to sour on him at least a little bit. This also includes Braun Strowman attacking him last night and leaving Neville to pick the bones.

Opening sequence.

Cedric Alexander vs. Brian Kendrick

Kendrick tries an early boot but gets elbowed in the face to start, followed by a baseball slide for good measure. Back in and the springboard clothesline misses so Kendrick knees him in the face for two. A butterfly suplex sets up a chinlock on Cedric for a bit, followed by a Japanese armdrag to send him into the corner again. That means a straitjacket hold but Cedric fights up again and hits the springboard clothesline. Kendrick is right back up with a kick to the ribs and Sliced Bread #2, only to have Cedric reverse into a rollup for the pin at 5:27.

Rating: C-. Not bad here and Cedric winning was the right call. Cedric continues to be one of the best stars around here and a nice addition to any show. Kendrick and Gallagher could be a good heel tandem but Gulak seems to be the star instead of Kendrick, which isn’t the biggest surprise in the world.

Post match Kendrick runs his mouth, allowing Gallagher to run in for the double beatdown.

Post break, Gallagher says he saw the scars on his face after his loss to Kendrick and realized he would rather be a winner than a joke.

Here’s Drew Gulak, with new music (thank goodness) to complain about his time in fashion jail last week. Breezango will be hearing from his attorney, which happens to be him. That brings him to last week, where he was interrupted while explaining his vision for a better 205 Live. After comparing himself to Galileo (another genius whose brilliant theory was held down), we continue the PowerPoint presentation! Slide #6 (of 277): no cell phones! Cue Akira Tozawa to cut him off again though and it’s time for a match.

Noam Dar vs. Akira Tozawa

Gulak is on commentary and ripping on Titus O’Neil. Tozawa starts fast with the backsplash but Dar kicks the legs out and starts working on the leg (Gulak: “NOW he has a reason to scream!”). Tozawa fights up without too much effort and sends Gulak outside for a suicide dive. A running European uppercut gives Dar two but an enziguri puts him right back down. The top rope backsplash puts Dar away at 4:01.

Rating: D+. Too short to mean much here but it advanced the feud well enough and it’s not like Dar means anything in the first place. Tozawa is still one of the top stars on the roster and can be used to make someone like Gulak, who hasn’t had the most success. At least he has a character now and that could go somewhere if they use it properly.

We recap Rich Swann defeating TJP last week.

TJP congratulates Swann for the win last week and says they have great chemistry together. Swann agrees but thinks they’ll get a bit too intense. He already has Lince Dorado tonight anyway, which TJP understands.

Rich Swann vs. Lince Dorado

And never mind as Dorado is laid out in the back. Swann goes to see what’s up and gets taken out by TJP. He even rips out part of Swann’s hair and drops him over the barricade.

Here’s Neville for the big closing talk. He talks about this Sunday’s card, which will include some big matches and one comedy match as he destroys Enzo Amore once and for all. Enzo thinks he’s ready to step up to his world and it’s time for Neville to knock him down. Cue Enzo with a taped up shoulder but Neville cuts him off, accusing Enzo of “spelling like a chicken”.

Enzo thinks Neville is jealous, which Neville finds funny when he’s better in every conceivable way. That’s true actually, but Enzo is twice the superstar that Neville will ever be. The fans aren’t sure what to think of that so Enzo rants about all of his merchandise and hanging out with celebrities.

Neville is a big fish in a small pond and Enzo is the shark that’s invaded the water. Neville doesn’t care about any of that because Enzo just can’t fight. Enzo says that’s true and kicks Neville low to end the show. So to recap, Enzo says he can’t wrestle and doesn’t really care about winning things because it’s all about making money and hanging with celebrities. And he’s the good guy in this whole thing?

Overall Rating: D+. Not a great show this week but it sets up some stuff for the future. Above all else, there are multiple stories going on at the moment and it makes for some good stuff. I’m worried about Enzo winning the title as all signs seem to point to it, though I’m really not sure if they’ll go through with it. I know it sounded great on paper for the last several months but sweet goodness it’s not doing much for me in reality. This wasn’t the best show but it laid some much needed ground work, which is much more important.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 21, 2003
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jonathan Coachman, Jerry Lawler

It’s the go home show for Backlash and we have a major main event for a change. This week will see HHH defending the Raw World Title against Booker T. in a Wrestlemania rematch, but there’s something a bit bigger to cover. Tonight is also the second Rock Concert as Rock is ready to deal with Bill Goldberg this coming Sunday. Let’s get to it.

Ric Flair is in Eric Bischoff’s office complaining about Bischoff’s actions of late. Bischoff calls it compelling television and makes Shawn Michaels guest referee for tonight’s title match. Flair is livid but seems to calm down when Bischoff suggests that Shawn might beat Booker up out of principle.

Opening sequence.

Chris Jericho vs. Hurricane

Fallout from last week’s main event. Hurricane throws the cape over Jericho’s face to start and hammers the Canadian out to the floor. That means a big dive as the announcers debate whether or not Hurricane is a real superhero. Back in and we hit a very early Walls of Jericho, sending Hurricane bailing to the ropes. Jericho sticks with the back and grabs a chinlock with a knee to the spine.

Hurricane fights up with a running clothesline and neckbreaker for two but the Overcast misses. It’s too early for the Lionsault though and Hurricane gets two off the Shining Wizard. The chokeslam gets the same with Jericho getting a boot on the ropes as this is already better than it should have been. Back up and the Eye of the Hurricane is countered into the Walls for the tap.

Rating: C+. Not a great match here but Hurricane continues to show off his more than adequate in-ring skills. If they were to, say, have him win another big match it might actually go somewhere. As usual, this is a case where the Intercontinental Title would do wonders for them but instead the focus needs to be on Shawn vs. HHH vs. Nash for the only title worth anything. Brilliant indeed.

Post match Flair runs out to beat on Hurricane, including the Figure Four.

Rock arrives and he’s got a guitar. Rock: “No no no, it’s not boo. It’s the Rock Concert TWO!”

Rodney Mack vs. Sean Evans

Behold, the debut of the Teddy Long Five Minute White Boy Challenge. Teddy promises that this will be off the hizzle fo shizzle. In about as long as it takes me to look up what that means, Mack crushes the jobber while Jerry defends himself from running against a black man for Mayor of Memphis. A running powerslam ends Evans in less than two minutes.

Booker T. asks Shawn what’s up with him being guest referee tonight. It was in this arena where Shawn superkicked him out of the NWO, which Shawn says makes them even after last week. That’s how Booker wants the match tonight called: even.

Goldberg got to meet some troops earlier today.

Coach brings out Lita for her first appearance on Raw in over a year. She’s gotten some great news from her doctor but here’s Bischoff to cut her off. Bischoff sends Coach off and tells the fans to cheer for Lita. In a rather out of character moment, Bischoff creepily hits on her and suggests that she do Playboy instead of wrestle. After the fans get done being rather pleased with Bischoff’s suggestion, Lita says no way. Bischoff offers to just let her give him a private showing instead, or just sleep with him to save her job. Lita tells him where he can go and walks off so Bischoff fires her.

What was the point of this? Bischoff is a lot of things but he’s not the creepy predator like Vince. This was completely out of character for him and felt much more awkward than evil. I can buy people trying to get the Divas to sleep with them to keep their jobs but Bischoff isn’t that kind of villain. I’m also not sure what the point of this was in the first place, though it’s good to have Lita back.

Flair and HHH want some insurance for the title match. HHH has an idea.

3 Minute Warning vs. Test/Scott Steiner

Chris Nowinski is on commentary. Jamal takes Steiner into the corner and hammers away to start before Rosey comes in with a side slam. The announcers talk about Stacy as Jamal breaks up a hot tag attempt. Jamal misses a top rope splash and the hot tag brings in Test for the running clothesline in the corner. The pumphandle powerslam gives Test two as Rosey splashes Jamal by mistake. Rico kicks Stacy down so Steiner checks on her, allowing Rosey to splash Test. Not that it matters as Steiner comes back in for a reverse DDT and the pin on Jamal.

Rating: D. 3 Minute Warning had a lot of potential but sweet goodness they’ve become one of the lamest acts I’ve seen in a long time. They’re just big guys who do the stereotypical big man offense, which is about as interesting as you can get. Test and Steiner are no better as Stacy continues to be the only good thing about either of them, which really isn’t all that surprising. You can tell the story is going to continue as well, which is far from the best news.

Post break Test and Steiner yell at each other until Stacy breaks it up.

Kevin Nash comes in to see Bischoff and talks about being brought in under the false pretense of teaming with HHH and Shawn. Nash says he’s going to pick a side and it’ll be the winning one.

Rock is warming up for the concert and promises a surprise.

Here’s Rock for the concert. After a hitch of the pants and some annoyance at the Rock chants, we’re ready to go. First up is Goldberg on My Mind but the fans chanting for Rock makes him snap again. Rock has had enough of this and calls Goldberg out right now….and it’s time for another Gillberg cameo, complete with fire extinguishers and sparklers.

After some jokes about Gillberg’s physique, Rock reads the words to The Rock Went Down to Georgia. Gillberg dances a little jig and the real Goldberg arrives in the back. As Goldberg comes through the back, Rock says that Gillberg is in trouble for the years of impersonations. Goldberg comes out so Rock hides behind the security, which is quickly dispatched.

Rock bails so security gets beaten down, leaving Gillberg to try his luck. That’s enough for Rock to sneak back in (as sneakily as a 6’5 275lb wrestler in leather pants can be) for a Rock Bottom before running again. We head to the back where Rock gets in the Hummer limo. Goldberg jumps in his Barracuda to give chase but the car stalls. Well of course it does. Goldberg gives chase on foot but Rock pops up, having faked running away. How shenanigany.

Trish Stratus and Spike Dudley are here for a match but Chief Morely comes out to introduce their opponents, who will also be challenging Rob Van Dam and Kane on Sunday.

Trish Stratus/Spike Dudley vs Dudley Boyz

Bubba powerbombs the heck out of Spike and Trish is even more scared than she was before. D-Von can’t bring himself to attack her though, leaving Bubba to splash Trish instead. Morely wants Trish put through a table but D-Von won’t have anything to do with it. Van Dam and Kane come in for the save. The guys all leave so Jazz and Teddy Long run in to beat down Trish with the Jazz Stinger sending her into the unset table.

Rock is still here and ready for an encore.

HHH and Nash are having a chat.

Rock is in the ring and it’s time to continue the concert. Before he can get a single note out though, here’s Goldberg to beat him down again. Christian comes out to take Goldberg down from behind though and the beatdown is on. Rock spears Christian down but gets chaired in the back for the real beatdown. It’s nice of them to have Rock get in some shots like this, but I can’t imagine this is making people think he has a chance on Sunday.

Backlash rundown.

Shawn talks to HHH.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Booker T.

HHH is defending with Shawn Michaels refereeing. They slug it out with Shawn breaking it up multiple times until Booker takes over with some chops. A side slam gets two as the announcers discuss the Trojan Horse. Flair gets knocked off the apron and here’s Jericho at ringside because this match isn’t big enough already. A few shots to Booker’s back while HHH has Shawn distracted (probably planning the next slumber party) take us to a break.

Back with Booker fighting out of the sleeper as Lawler wants to know why Shawn is allowing Jericho to stay at ringside. Fair question actually. The spinebuster gives HHH two and the kneedrop is good for the same. The slow beating continues as King talks about how great it is to see the Kliq back together.

Everyone used to talk about them you see. As usual, the problem is that they were never a thing on WWE TV and it’s WWE assuming that everyone knows and/or cares about the backstage stuff. If that’s what you’re going with, at least make it clear what you’re talking about instead of just acting like it’s something everyone already knows. HHH grabs the second sleeper until Booker fights back with a side kick to put both guys down.

Another side kick triggers the real comeback, including a third kick to knock HHH out of the air for a rather near fall. The missile dropkick gets two more as Flair is out of the jacket and panicking as only he can. HHH grabs a DDT but the Pedigree is broken up, setting up the ax kick. Flair and Jericho have to be dealt with before the cover though and HHH gets out again.

The Houston Hangover is loaded up but HHH shoves Shawn into the ropes for the crotching. Why this isn’t a DQ isn’t clear but it’s good for two more. Shawn deals with Flair as Booker hits ANOTHER kick, only to have Jericho get in a belt shot. For once though Shawn is actually smart enough to figure this out and won’t count. Instead he superkicks HHH and decks the other villains but they come back in to break up the count, setting up the no contest.

Rating: B-. The match was good, especially if you forget that Booker STILL doesn’t have a big singles win as he’s stuck in the middle of the Kliq’s family fighting. The match was good enough and helped to set up Sunday but that brings us to the big problem: a World Title match and the main event of the Raw World Title match at Wrestlemania is being used to set up a nothing six man tag. That’s quite the stretch for priorities and it’s not a good thing. Having a match be good doesn’t make up for the fact that it’s all to set up such a stupid story and actually makes it far worse.

Nash comes out to play peacemaker but HHH decks him from behind to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Where do I even begin? Above all else, the two top stories on this show range from stupid to completely uninteresting. You can take your pick between Rock having to pretend that the fans love Goldberg and that he actually has a chance of winning on Sunday or HHH, Shawn and Nash arguing over who gets to keep the kid (pick which of those is which) after their divorce in matches that mean absolutely nothing.

The six man isn’t going to be used to elevate Jericho or Booker but it gets Nash and Flair main event spots for the simple reason of who they hang out with backstage. I’m assuming we’re heading towards Goldberg as the top face star, but not until Nash vs. HHH gets to headline a few pay per views, despite the fact that ONLY Nash and HHH are interested in seeing that match.

What did we have aside from this stuff? Bischoff being creepy, Test and Scott Steiner fighting over Stacy Keibler, Chief Morely as the enforcer who makes the Dudleyz beat up Trish Stratus and the Five Minute White Boy Challenge. I have no idea how this is considered their best possible option but I would love to have that explained to me.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Complete 2002 Monday Night Raw Reviews in either E-Book or Paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/07/21/new-e-bookpaperback-kbs-complete-monday-night-raw-2002-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: September 19, 2017
Location: Oracle Arena, Oakland, California
Commentators: Tom Phillips, Corey Graves, Byron Saxton

I’m getting used to this idea of having title matches booked in advance of the TV shows. This time around we have the US Title on the line as AJ Styles defends against Baron Corbin, who said he was answering this week’s Open Challenge in advance. And there’s that whole Kevin Owens attempting to murder Vince McMahon deal. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the ending of last week’s show with Owens destroying Mr. McMahon in a heck of a beatdown.

Here’s Shane McMahon to open things up. He calls his father one salty SOB, which is really not a nice thing to say about your grandmother. Last week Shane sat with his kids and watched his father and their grandfather get the beating of a lifetime. Shane talks about the family’s toughness and condemns him to a beating of a lifetime inside the Cell.

Randy Orton vs. Aiden English

English sings about Orton hearing voices in his head because it’s full of lead. Orton wastes no time by hitting the powerslam in the first minute but Aiden slips out of the hanging DDT. They head outside with English dropping him onto the announcers’ table as we take a break. Back with Orton fighting out of a chinlock but getting dropkicked right back down. English goes to the second rope….and dives right into the RKO for the pin at 7:10.

Rating: C-. I could go for more of English getting in some offense as the singing character is something that could get him a nice little run. It’s not like they have anything else going on so give it a try. Orton is likely going to continue his “feud” with Rusev, which will hopefully last longer than fifteen seconds next time.

Post match here’s Rusev to talk about Orton turning his homecoming into a national disgrace. Rusev is going to change things right now….and let’s ring the bell.

Rusev vs. Randy Orton

English distracts Orton and it’s a superkick to end Orton at 11 seconds. I WAS KIDDING ABOUT THE FIFTEEN SECONDS THING!!! That sounds like payback for what happened at Summerslam, which is still a dumb idea, especially if Orton wins in a long match at the pay per view. Just give Rusev a win or two that matters and things will be better, not just having this stuff that means nothing more than a fluke.

Rusev is very excited with the win and says he’ll return home as a conquering hero.

Here are Jinder Mahal and the Singh Brothers to make fun of Shinsuke Nakamura’s face again, including his mad and artistic faces. Mahal makes fun of Nakamura’s voice and hair, followed by some Mr. Miyagi jokes. Fans: “THAT’S TOO FAR!” We get some Punjabi and that’s about it. Aside from probably being racist, this showed that these two have nothing to say to each other and are only fighting because one of them has the title.

Nakamura says it won’t be so funny when he wins the title.

Here’s AJ Styles for his title defense but before the match, AJ says Kevin has bitten off more than he can chew. He attacked the man who is responsible for all of us being here tonight. As for Corbin, AJ is tired of him trying to short cut his way everywhere. The big bad wolf can huff and puff but he’ll never blow down the house that AJ Styles built.

US Title: AJ Styles vs. Baron Corbin

Styles is defending but Corbin jumps him during the Big Match Intros. Tye Dillinger runs in to jump Corbin though and hurts his ankle. AJ is up for a running forearm and the Calf Crusher on the bad leg. No match of course and we’ll just wait on the announcement for the match being moved to the pay per view.

Post break, Corbin isn’t happy.

Here’s Charlotte for the first time in a good while. She’s been gone for about six weeks while her father has been healing up and he is making a comeback. Since she’s been gone, Charlotte has learned how fragile life is and from now on she’s going to make the most of every moment she can.

Cue Natalya to says he’s here to host the first ever Celebration of Women. There’s a covered up picture put up behind Natalya as she talks about how important women have been to the world. The picture is unveiled and of course it’s of Natalya herself. Charlotte likes the picture and says she’s coming for the title. This brings out Becky Lynch to say the title is coming back to its proper owner.

Now it’s Naomi to call Natalya a crazy cat lady and throw her glowing hat into the title hunt. Hang on a second though as it’s Tamina and Lana interrupting because this company has no idea how to book a women’s division aside from just throwing everyone into one match. Natalya leaves and says she’s not a crazy cat lady but here’s Daniel Bryan to make the multi-woman match to crown a new #1 contender for later tonight.

New Day vs. Hype Bros

Non-title with the Usos on commentary. Mojo grabs an abdominal stretch on Big E. but gets sent outside for a break less than a minute in because we can’t break ten minutes of wrestling on this show. Back with Kofi in trouble in the corner until Mojo misses a charge into the post. The hot tag brings in Big E., who misses the hip swivel Warrior Splash. Ryder adds the middle rope dropkick and the Broski Boot for two. Kofi hits the running dive over the top onto Mojo, leaving Ryder to take the Midnight Hour for the pin at 6:26. Not enough shown to rate but this was entertaining while it lasted.

We look at the Vince beatdown again.

Owens joins us live via satellite and apologizes (fans aren’t cool with that) for what happened last week. He apologizes to the WWE Universe and to the McMahon Family, but Shane had this coming. This is all on Shane, who drove Owens to do what he did last week. Last week, Owens was looking at Shane when he attacked Vince. He has one more apology and it’s to anyone who watches the pay per view. What he did to Vince is nothing compared to what’s going to do to Shane. It’s good that they’re going to Hell because people like Owens don’t go to Heaven.

Mojo says he’s tired of losing and something has to change.

Here’s Dolph Ziggler for his usual stuff: he’s the best in-ring performer ever and entrances don’t mean anything. First up it’s HHH, which means he can run NXT now, even if he’s not wearing mom jeans. Ziggler looks upset and says stop the show. That means Heartbreak Ziggler with Dolph saying he can feel himself losing his smile. The last one is the DX entrance, complete with the glow sticks. Ziggler’s two words for you: WHO CARES? He wants to know who is supposed to care about two dads trying to sell you stuff. Ziggler is the best ever and the fans couldn’t care less.

Naomi vs. Charlotte vs. Tamina vs. Becky Lynch

The winner gets Natalya at the pay per view. It’s a brawl to start and we’re on a break less than a minute in. Back with Charlotte and Becky breaking up a near fall before fighting each other. Becky kicks her in the ribs but Naomi crossbodies both of them for two on Lynch. Naomi grabs a Stunner for two on Charlotte as Natalya is watching in the back.

The reverse Rings of Saturn is broken up and it’s Becky grabbing the Disarm-Her. Tamina breaks that up as well but gets sent into the post. Becky’s bouncing kick in the corner is broken up and Charlotte spears Tamina down. She plants Naomi too and the moonsault hits both of them for a double near fall.

The Figure Four goes on but Becky dives in with a legdrop for the save. Tamina is back in with a Samoan drop on Becky and the Superfly Splash for two with Naomi making the save this time. Lana pulls Naomi outside but the distraction lets Charlotte kick Tamina in the face for the pin and the title shot at 9:57.

Rating: B-. This was good while it lasted and would have been better if we didn’t miss about a fourth of it for the sake of a commercial. Charlotte or Becky winning was fine here and they would have been a bit nuts to not go with Charlotte, especially with the book coming out and her dad’s health. It was a fast paced match though and that’s what this show needed.

Overall Rating: D+. This one ENTIRELY depends on how you care for your show. The big problem on this show is very simple: there was less than twenty five minutes of wrestling in two hours with about ten of that taking place during commercials. That’s terribly low, even by WWE standards. Based on that, it’s a horrible show.

However, this show was much more about hyping up the pay per view and I could get behind the idea of a show that gives away less action on the unimportant shows and saves it for the pay per views. On top of that I’m more interested in the pay per view than I was coming into this week, which is quite the step up. This show certainly isn’t for everyone but I liked the change of direction and you can see a lot more stuff added to the pay per view from here. It had a lot of negatives (low in-ring time, the Mahal stuff, Rusev/Orton) but the change of pace was very nice for a little switch.

Results

Randy Orton b. Aiden English – RKO

Rusev b. Randy Orton – Superkick

New Day b. Hype Bros – Midnight Hour to Ryder

Charlotte b. Naomi, Tamina and Becky Lynch – Big boot to Tamina

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