Summerslam 2013
Date: August 18, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,166
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

This is the show that was voted on for the annual redo and I can’t say I’m complaining. The show was instantly revered and it held up when I watched it the second time. We’ve got a double main event with Daniel Bryan challenging John Cena for the World Title and CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar in the Best vs. the Beast. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Rob Van Dam

Dean is defending and we still have the full Shield entrance (no Reigns/Rollins here) through the crowd, which is still just cool. A shoulder drops Rob to start and Dean grabs a hammerlock as it’s a slow pace early on. Rob clotheslines him into a headlock but charges into a boot to the face for two. A neckbreaker gives Dean the same and we hit the neck crank as we’re somehow four minutes into this.

Ambrose gets in a running dropkick and grabs a quickly broken chinlock. Rob kicks him down to set up the Five Star but Rollins and Reigns come through the crowd, rendering him completely incapable of jumping. Big Show and Mark Henry show up as well though, putting us all even as we as we take a break.

Back with Dean grabbing a chinlock and sending Rob outside. That means a staredown on the floor as Henry and Show earn those paychecks and DVD royalties. Rob drops Dean on the barricade and hits the spinning kick to the back. A rollup gives Rob two back inside but he walks into a good looking spinebuster for two. Dean misses a top rope elbow but Rob has to go after Rollins instead of Five Starring. Rolling Thunder crushes Dean and it’s Five Star time, only to have Reigns spear Rob down for the DQ at 13:38.

Rating: D+. This was a pretty sad way to start the show as you would expect a lot more from these two. Ambrose was a very natural arrogant heel but Rob was just going through the motions. It didn’t help that the big plot point, Show and Henry, did NOTHING here and Reigns interfered anyway. It’s never a good sign when you can completely take people out of a match and it changes nothing but that was the case here. Really disappointing outing.

And now on to the mai…..IT’S LESS THAN THREE HOURS!!! Oh sweet goodness happy days are here again!

Here’s the Miz, your host for the evening and still a face here, to open things up. He explains the two main events, just in case people stumbled in here expecting a free car wash. Fandango and Summer Rae (dang) cut him off and dance around him. Miz: “Really? Really?” Anyway, welcome to Summerslam.

The opening video talks about how the stars are out tonight and has a bit of a grainy look to it for a unique visual. As you might expect, the two main events receive most of the attention. Of note: the instrumental background music would become Akira Tozawa’s theme.

JoJo sings the National Anthem, which was a plot point on Total Divas because Total Divas is creatively bankrupt.

Kane vs. Bray Wyatt

This is a Ring of Fire match, meaning the ring is surrounded by fire like an inferno match but you win by regular means. It’s also Wyatt’s in-ring debut, which is kind of gobsmacking. Kane unloads on him in the corner to start as the arena is much darker than usual to show off the flames. A clothesline drops Wyatt and the flames go over the top rope.

Kane gets in a suplex for the same result as Luke Harper and Erick Rowan are panicking on the floor. The fact that they’re there more or less guarantees they find a way to interfere, thereby making the gimmick worthless. Wyatt hits a running splash in the corner and hammers away on the mat. A big boot to the…..arm maybe drops Wyatt and there’s the sidewalk slam for no cover.

Harper tries to grab a kendo stick but it gets caught on fire, sending an overzealous fireman to put it out. Rowan takes his extinguisher but can’t get rid of the flames. The chokeslam plants Wyatt for no cover as Kane would rather do it again, likely so Harper and Rowan can figure out a way inside. They find a fireproof….something and get inside for the big beatdown. Rowan splashes Kane and Sister Abigail gives Bray the pin at 7:48.

Rating: F+. This was WAY worse than I remember as it was literally just killing time until the ending. The ending was as telegraphed as it could have been and there was never any drama. Instead of actually having a match, this was a mental exercise for the Family and that’s REALLY not how you want to debut someone with the kind of potential Wyatt has.

Post match the Wyatts crush Kane with the steps and carry him off to film See No Evil 2.

The Kickoff Show panel wastes a minute of our time.

We see a Paul Heyman promo on the Kickoff Show, talking about how in reality, David would have thrown a stone at Goliath and then taken the beating of a lifetime. As a bonus, tonight’s match is No DQ.

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

They used to be partners until Sandow won the Money in the Bank briefcase (it’s still the brown one which looks like a Hershey bar) in the surprise for the sake of swerving the fans who KNEW Cody was going to win (which he was). Before the match, Sandow says he was the leader of the Rhodes Scholars and tonight, he’s sending Cody back to the Rhodes Family so they can be dumb and dumber. Cole’s big plug for the entrances: watch the JBL and Cole Show to find out why Cody shaved his mustache!

They start fast with Sandow shoving him into the corner but getting backdropped. The gordbuster gives Cody two but a legsweep sends him outside. Back in and some knees to the back set up a bow and arrow hold. Sandow has to fight out of an early Cross Rhodes attempt and drops the Wind Up Elbow for two. I know Sandow has the charisma but dang it’s not working in the ring.

Sandow puts on a standing leglock for a few moment before switching to just rubbing Cody’s face in the mat. Cody catches him on the top though and it’s something like a Muscle Buster for two. A springboard missile dropkick gets two on Sandow but he comes right back with a running flip neckbreaker for the same. Cody nails the Disaster Kick for the near fall, followed by Cross Rhodes for the pin at 6:39.

Rating: C+. They were working hard out there and had a good match but it’s very clear that Sandow is in WAY over his head with the briefcase. I don’t think anyone really bought him as a main eventer at this point and his pretty worthless TNA run doesn’t exactly change the theory that it was the stunt double gimmick that was so good and not him.

Video on Christian, who is back for one more run at the World Title.

Smackdown World Title: Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Christian is challenging. Del Rio has Lillian Garcia introduce him in Spanish, which isn’t quite a heel move in a major Hispanic market. Alberto grabs a headlock but gets slapped for his efforts, followed by the back of the neck snap across the top rope. That’s fine with him though as he puts Christian on the top for a heck of a running enziguri to put Christian in the Tree of Woe.

Del Rio starts in on the arm by sending it into the barricade and it’s off to an early armbar. A top rope double stomp to the shoulder makes it even worse, but not as bad as it would be with the top rope double stomp out of the Tree of Woe. The champ misses a charge though and crashes out to the floor to give Christian a breather. Back in and Del Rio dives into a raised boot, followed by a middle rope missile dropkick for no cover. The high crossbody gets two but Christian is holding the arm.

It’s too early for the Killswitch so Christian goes up, only to get pulled off the middle rope with a Backstabber in a cool spot. A middle rope backsplash doesn’t work for the champ but he’s still able to block the spear (which Christian should NEVER use) with a dropkick. Del Rio takes down his kneepad but gets rolled up for two more. Now the spear connects, only to have the shoulder give out. That means a cross armbreaker and Christian taps (rather surprising) at 12:30.

Rating: B. I had a lot more fun with this than I was expecting, which I think is what I said when I watched this the first time around too. Christian was a great choice for a challenger at this level as he’s going to have a good match no matter what. Unfortunately this was about it for him as he would only wrestle a few more matches in 2013, then come back for another short run to start the new year, ending with a concussion that caused his retirement. It’s a shame, but probably for the best as you don’t want to mess with that area.

Post match Del Rio says the Mexican people need an idol and his name is Alberto Del Rio.

Clips from Summerslam Axxess, which has never come close to matching the Wrestlemania version.

Miz (oh yeah he’s here) talks to Maria Menunos, who won in a tag match at Axxess. Fandango and Summer Rae dance in again but this time Miz and Maria show them up with some dancing of their own. Did you know Maria Menunos of some entertainment show is here? If you don’t, you will when this is all over that show.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

No story of note here, but Cole introduces the two of them as “some of the stars of Total Divas”. Just in case you thought Summerslam was the point here. Naturally more cast members are at ringside and sweet goodness I forgot how annoying this era was for the women. Feeling out process to start as Natalya tries to do any kind of wrestling with Brie. They finally go with the slapping until Natalya sends her outside for a baseball slide. The JBL and MICHAEL COLE chants start up and there’s the JERRY chant to complete the trio.

Brie grabs a chinlock and the fans want tables. A jawbreaker gets Natalya out of trouble and she grabs the Sharpshooter until Brie slips out and sends her hard into the corner. We get the required catfight on the floor and it’s time for a Zack Ryder chant. The yet to be named BRIE MODE knee seems to wake Natalya up as it’s the Sharpshooter to make Brie tap at 5:18.

Rating: D-. The match could have been so much worse but the story, or lack thereof, had this thing doomed from the start. This was back at the start of the Total Divas era and fans hadn’t gotten sick of the show yet. They don’t get along on Total Divas for whatever nonsense reason the writers have come up with so here’s a short match between them. Not horrible but sweet goodness could we please get the tiniest bit of effort?

Earlier today, Ryback poured soup on a catering worker.

We recap CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar and I begin to smile. This is mainly about Punk vs. Paul Heyman, who had been Punk’s supporter for years. Then Punk started to change his attitude and told Heyman that he wanted to do this by himself. That wasn’t cool with Heyman, who cost him the Money in the Bank ladder match. Punk went after Heyman so Brock Lesnar returned to be Heyman’s muscle. The match was set with the great tagline “The Best vs. The Beast.” Do you need much more than that?

CM Punk vs. Brock Lesnar

No DQ. I know I say this a lot but Brock Lesnar coming down the aisle is one of the scariest sights in wrestling. Punk charges right at him and gets driven into the corner for some shoulders. A hard whip sends Punk into a different corner as the fans are trying to stay behind him. Punk’s strikes have almost no effect (Punk not being able to strike with an MMA guy? I’m sure that won’t be an even bigger joke three years later.) and Brock easily stomps him down in the corner.

Punk gets in a kick to the jaw and a pair of running knees knock Lesnar outside for a suicide dive. That’s exactly the kind of hope spot that the fans needed to get back into this but Lesnar cuts them off by slamming the steps, which are in Punk’s hands, straight into Punk’s face. Punk http://onhealthy.net/product-category/mental-disorders/ posts him though and scores with the clothesline off the barricade, only to make the mistake of going after Heyman.

One heck of a toss sends Punk over the announcers’ table as there’s not much of a way around that kind of power. That’s not good enough though as Brock throws him over the other table, just so it won’t feel left out. Lesnar jumps into a stomp onto a piece of the table onto Punk before sending him flying off a belly to belly (leaving a big sweat stain on the floor).

Back in and Lesnar fires off more shoulders to the ribs and we hit the bearhug. An elbow to the nose staggers Brock for a bit but he knees Punk hard in the ribs to put him down again. It’s back to the bearhug as they’re doing a good job with cutting off the hope spots. Punk kicks away but dives right into a fall away slam to cut him off again. A chinlock lasts for a little while until Punk fights up and bites the ear to escape.

Punk FINALLY drops him with a series of kicks and the running knee in the corner makes it even worse. Lesnar catches a running knee but Punk escapes and high kicks him down, setting up the Macho Elbow (looked awful, almost more like a sideways splash) for a pretty hot two. Neither finisher can connect so Punk kicks him in the head again and Brock goes down from a single shot. You don’t see that every day.

The GTS is countered into the Kimura but that’s reversed into a cross armbreaker and then a triangle choke. A powerbomb doesn’t break the hold so Brock lifts him up again, shrugs off the elbows to the head and PLANTS Punk with a running powerbomb. The fans are INSANE for Punk but Brock cuts them off with the most vicious Three Amigos you’ll ever see. Brock very slowly heads outside to grab a chair so Punk dives onto him, only to land on the chair, which lands on Lesnar to put both of them down.

It’s Punk up first with the chair though and he wears Brock out….until Lesnar just takes it away from him. That’s fine with Punk as a low blow gets him out of trouble (Punk: “WHERE’S YOUR CUP NOW UFC BOY???”) and freaks Heyman out all over again. Punk takes the chair up top and drops something like a Macho Elbow for two more. A few more chair shots have Lesnar in trouble until Heyman takes it away.

Punk grabs Heyman’s tie to block the F5 (smart) and it’s the GTS but Heyman makes the save for the false finish of the year. Reality sets in on Heyman (as only it can) and he realizes there’s no Brock to save him. Punk gives chase but runs into the F5, which he counters into a tornado DDT for two more. The Anaconda Vice goes on but Punk lets it go to cut Heyman off. A big right hand drops Paul, only to have Lesnar BLAST Punk with the chair. The F5 onto the chair finally ends Punk at 25:18.

Rating: A+. I gave this Match of the Year and I’m certainly not changing that now. This was a total war with Punk shocking the heck out of me by taking Lesnar to the limit. If nothing else, this is the textbook example of how to book Lesnar vs. a smaller guy. You even have Punk saving some face by having Heyman interfere so often. It’s an outstanding match and easily holds up four years later.

As I mentioned a few times, Punk was giving the fans just enough hope spots to keep things going. No one was going to buy Punk hanging in a fist fight with him (nor should they have bought it with HHH but that’s a long issue for another time) but they could buy him getting in a few shots here and there and giving it all he had. That’s wrestling storytelling in a nutshell and it was as entertaining as it could have been. If not for Punk vs. Cena in 2011, this would be Punk’s WWE masterpiece.

Punk pulls himself up and gets the hero’s ovation. It’s a shame that he would be gone in four months.

A fan agreed to trade tickets to a house show for three tickets to Summerslam and Summerslam Axxess if he took a splash from Mark Henry. Oh and he gets to sit ringside (meaning in front of the announcers’ tables for the next match). Well gee I wonder if that’s a hard decision.

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/Kaitlyn

Former partners/couple who split up and absolutely no one is interested here. The guys start things off and it’s an early belly to belly to drop Ziggler. We hit an early abdominal stretch with a stomach claw thrown in as a bonus. Ziggler comes back with a dropkick and the too early to be a hot tag brings in the women. AJ spin kicks Kaitlyn down for two and it’s off to a cravate.

Back to back neckbreakers give AJ….an opportunity to dance around the ring, allowing Kaitlyn to kick her away. The hot tag brings in Dolph for another dropkick and his jumping elbows. Big E. is right back up with a powerbomb backbreaker for two with Kaitlyn making a save. A charge hits post though and Kaitlyn spears AJ in half on the floor. The Big Ending is countered and the Zig Zag gives Dolph the pin at 6:42.

Rating: D+. They didn’t have time to do much here and were in the death spot, which doesn’t work very well when they’re doing a TV match. It’s not terrible or anything and Kaitlyn spearing AJ is always entertaining. They were still getting ready to launch the Women’s Revolution down in NXT so this was about as good as you were going to get from the women at this point. Big E. vs. Ziggler kept going for a good while but never went anywhere, which is why New Day was the best thing that could have happened to Langston.

Fandango interrupts Miz again and finally gets punched out.

The Kickoff Show panel goes over their main event picks and talk about some of the show.

We recap John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan. Daniel had been on the roll of a lifetime and Cena was allowed to pick his challenger for Summerslam. Cena selected Daniel Bryan but Vince McMahon was suddenly against Bryan as the top star. It was clearly Bryan vs. the establishment and as a bonus, HHH will be guest referee for the title match. I’m sure nothing will come of it.

Bryan vs. Cena was built up as a big fight as well with Bryan calling Cena a phony who wasn’t here for the wrestling. Cena said he’s had his share of great matches but he’s had them while holding the WWE World Title. Bryan is the best competition around but the best isn’t going to be good enough.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Daniel Bryan

Bryan is challenging, Cena has a baseball sized amount of fluid in his elbow which is going to force him to leave almost immediately after this show, and HHH is guest referee. Cena headlocks him to the mat to start but Bryan armdrags him off. The test of strength drives Bryan down again but Cena can’t break his bridge in an impressive (and surprising) power display. The threat of a YES Lock sends Cena bailing out to the floor and we take a breather.

Back in and Bryan easily takes him down for a surfboard, only to have Cena kick him away without much effort. Cena kicks him into the steps and suplexes him off the steps for good measure. If quiets the YOU CAN’T WRESTLE chants for a few seconds but they’re quickly replaced by the YOU STILL SUCK chants. At least they’re consistent in their hatred. Back in and Cena powers him away again before countering a hurricanrana attempt with a sitout powerbomb.

We hit the chinlock for a bit until Cena powers up and fires off some kicks in the corner. Cena fights up again and tries the finishing sequence, only to have the Shuffle broken up with a kick to the face. The second attempt works a bit better though and is good for two but Bryan kicks him in the eye again. Cena is starting to sport a black eye but Bryan wisely starts going after the arm. A quick STF attempt is countered into an STF from Bryan but Cena makes the ropes.

The AA is countered straight into the YES Lock and Cena is in trouble. He powers out again so Bryan slaps on a guillotine as Cena just can’t shake him off for good. The hold is finally broken and Bryan is a bit surprised, allowing Cena to grab a quick AA for two. Cena heads up but Bryan is right there again with a superplex. Bryan hangs on and pulls himself back up for the Swan Dive and a very near fall.

The suicide dive is blocked with a hard forearm and now the top rope Fameasser is good for two. With a one and one record up top, Cena tries it again, this time loading Bryan up for a super AA. Bryan tries a super hurricanrana to counter but Cena counters into what looked like an attempt at a Styles Clash, only to drop Bryan SQUARE ON HIS HEAD with a scary sounding thud.

The STF goes on but breaks down a bit with Cena winding up on his side, allowing Bryan to flip over into the YES Lock. Cena makes the rope again so Bryan goes back to the strikes with the running corner dropkicks. That’s fine with Cena, who turns Bryan inside out with the hard clothesline. NOW the fans are into both guys and there’s no reason for them to not be.

They slug it out until a double clothesline puts both guys down for another breather. Cena slaps Bryan hard in the face so Bryan does the same right back but Cena powers him up for the AA. That’s countered into a hard DDT though and Cena is in trouble again. One heck of a kick to the head drops Cena and Bryan debuts the running knee for the pin and the title in a shocking finish at 26:55.

Rating: A+. Yeah this worked too. The fact that Bryan pinned him clean was the completely correct call as the win is what matters, not the title itself. Bryan looks like the biggest star in the world now and this is confirmation that WWE sees him as a top name. The fact that it was an outstanding match helps things even better, but that ending is still perfect. Bryan beat Cena down and then hit a finisher to pin him. What else could he possibly ask for? Well, save for what came at Wrestlemania of course but sweet goodness this was outstanding stuff.

Cena stares Bryan down but shakes his hand. Pyro and confetti go off….and here’s Mr. Money in the Bank Randy Orton. Randy holds up the case at ringside so Bryan says bring it. Orton turns around and walks away, leaving HHH (who called the match right down the line and was a complete non-factor) to turn on Bryan and lay him out with the Pedigree.

Raw World Title: Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Faster than I can type Orton is challenging (ok not really), he wins the title at 8 seconds.

The crowd is eerily quiet as HHH hands Orton the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: A-. Everything that needed to be great was WAY beyond great and everything else was as forgettable (and thankfully short) as it needed to be. The whole thing that matters here are two matches combining for over fifty minutes (remember that it’s less than three hours long) and they’re both instant Match of the Year candidates. This show is an absolute classic and well worth checking out for the last great pre-Network shows.

Ratings Comparison

Rob Van Dam vs. Dean Ambrose

Original: B-

2014 Redo: B-

2017 Redo: D+

Bray Wyatt vs. Kane

Original: D+

2014 Redo: D

2017 Redo: F+

Damien Sandow vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: C

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: C+

Alberto Del Rio vs. Christian

Original: B+

2014 Redo: B

2017 Redo: B

Brie Bella vs. Natalya

Original: F

2014 Redo: D-

2017 Redo: D-

Brock Lesnar vs. CM Punk

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

Big E. Langston/AJ Lee vs. Dolph Ziggler/AJ Lee

Original: C-

2014 Redo: D+

2017 Redo: D+

Daniel Bryan vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2014 Redo: A+

2017 Redo: A+

Randy Orton vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: N/A

2014 Redo: N/A

2017 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A-

2014 Redo: A

2017 Redo: A-

What is up with that opener? I really liked it that much earlier on?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/18/summerslam-2013-a-star-is-born/

And the 2014 Redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2014/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2013-2014-redo-what-a-difference-a-year-makes/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2012
Date: August 19, 2013
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,205
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

The main story here is Brock Lesnar is back, having returned the night after Wrestlemania to start a feud with John Cena. That feud lasted for a month before Lesnar started going after HHH. It wasn’t until three months later, as in tonight, that they’re having their showdown. Other than that we have Punk defending the title against Big Show and Cena and Sheamus defending against Del Rio. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

This is one of those ideas that was brought back after far too many years off. Santino is defending and Cesaro has his HORRID dance music here. He also has Aksana who isn’t horrid at all, other than in the ring of course. Cesaro’s word of the day in five languages: greatness. Santino does the power walk to the ring and is as goofy as ever. Cesaro takes it to the mat but Santino actually spins out for two.

A judo throw puts Cesaro down before Santino power walks out of an Irish whip. Must resist country jokes. Santino avoids a charge in the corner and loads up the Cobra but Cesaro takes his head off from behind. The Cobra goes to the floor and Aksana throws it away. Off to a reverse chinlock with Cesaro pulling on Marella’s ears to keep him away from the Cobra. IT’S A FREAKING SOCK! I know Foley used one too but it didn’t seem to have magical powers.

Santino kicks Cesaro away but still can’t get the sock. The gutwrench suplex gets no cover from the challenger, as he would rather rip the Cobra to shreds. Santino pounds away but misses the headbutt. He counters the Neutralizer and pulls out another Cobra, proving THAT IT’S JUST A FREAKING SOCK! Aksana gets on the apron and the Cobra wants her, allowing Cesaro to hit the Neutralizer for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. IT’S A FREAKING SOCK! Match was ok but the majority of the five minutes were spent on Santino trying to put a sock on his hand so he can use a neck attack taught to him by John Lovitz. I know he’s a comedy character but there’s a point where it’s stupid rather than funny. Santino half crossed that line years ago.

The opening video talks about the twenty five years of Summerslam, meaning we’ll have to hear about how this is the 25^th anniversary. The video is interrupted by talk of a storm called Brock Lesnar, which to be fair is the main draw of the show.

Jerry and Cole’s intro is cut off by Vickie’s screeching intro of Ziggler.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Chris Jericho

Dolph is Mr. MITB here and Jericho is freshly face after Ziggler accused him of going soft. Jericho has taped up ribs from an attack at Ziggler’s hands. The fans LOVE Chris and things start fast with the Canadian hitting the jumping back elbow to the jaw. Jericho slips out of the corner on a spinning clothesline but Ziggler escapes a suplex and kicks him in the ribs to take over. Dolph stays on the ribs for a quick two but gets backdropped out to the floor.

Chris’ springboard dive misses as Ziggler casually ducks, sending Jericho crashing to the floor. Ziggler hooks on a chinlock with a bodyscissors to stay on the ribs. A knee to the head gets two for Dolph and a neckbreaker, complete with hip swivel and ARROGANT COVER, gets two more.

Jericho gets a quick cradle for two but Ziggler takes him right back down with a clothesline. Dolph misses a Stinger Splash and Chris goes after him, only to be easily taken down by another shot to the ribs. Not that it matters as he pops up top for the ax handle but Ziggler kicks him in the ribs again. The Fameasser gets two but an enziguri puts Dolph down for two as well. Back and forth match so far here.

Dolph jumps over Chris in the corner and puts on the sleeper which looks horrid here. Jericho rams him into the corner to escape and rains down some right hands before snapping off a top rope hurricanrana. The ribs are damaged even more though, delaying the count by several seconds. A jumping DDT gets two on the Canadian and Ziggler is getting frustrated.

They slug it out with Jericho taking him down via the bulldog but the Lionsault hits knees. The Zig Zag gets two but Dolph can’t follow up. Instead he walks into the Codebreaker to send him to the floor. Jericho throws him in but gets tripped up by Vickie, allowing Ziggler to roll him up for two. Dolph misses a charge into the post and the Walls go on for the submission.

Rating: C+. The idea here was that Jericho couldn’t win the big one anymore. The problem here though is they would have a rematch tomorrow night with Jericho’s contract and Dolph’s case on the line. Why they didn’t have that match here is anyone’s guess but at least it was a good opener and the fans popped for the ending. They had some Shelton vs. HBK from 2005 in there with Jericho fighting a younger version of himself but using his maturity and experience to get the win.

Vickie freaks out over the loss.

We recap Brock breaking Shawn Michaels’ arm on Raw.

Heyman and Brock say Lesnar wins tonight.

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

It’s amazing that this team started less than a year ago. The fans are already chanting YES and Bryan says NO. It’s amazing how a chant this simple carried Bryan so far. This was set up by GM AJ as revenge against Bryan for jilting her or something. Bryan fires off kicks to start but walks into an uppercut to knock him back. Daniel moonsaults over Kane in the corner but gets kicked in the face to put him down. The low dropkick gets two for Kane but the fans are all behind Daniel.

Another big boot gets two but Bryan comes back with the kicks to the legs, only to be thrown over the top and out to the floor. Bryan slides back in and hits the FLYING GOAT to put Kane down. The missile dropkick drops Kane again and there are more kicks, only to have Kane clothesline his way out of trouble. The side slam gets two and the top rope clothesline looks to set up the chokeslam but Bryan bails to the floor.

Bryan slaps him in the face like a knucklehead, sending Kane through the roof. Bryan is tossed into the corner and stomped down by a furious Kane. The referee drags him away, allowing Bryan to try the NO Lock. Kane powers out so Bryan kicks him in the head. Why overcomplicate things? The flying headbutt is caught in the chokeslam but Kane wants the tombstone, allowing Bryan to counter into a small package for the pin.

Rating: C+. Good match here and you could see the anger management stuff coming. Kane had Bryan beat but wanted revenge and let Bryan catch him off guard. These two obviously had chemistry together and the story would be a big boost to Kane’s career. Also the original idea here was Bryan vs. Charlie Sheen somehow. Thankfully that was never mentioned again.

Kane is going nuts in the back. Josh Matthews comes up to him like the schnook he is and is LAUNCHED off camera in a funny bit.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

Miz is defending and Mysterio is dressed like Batman. Rey grabs a quick rollup for two and the champion bails to the floor for a bit. AJ has promised to deal with Kane for attacking Matthews tomorrow on Raw. Miz throws Mysterio through the ropes to the floor but Rey rolls through to avoid pain. The champion sends him ribs first into the barricade to take over as this isn’t doing much for me so far.

Miz pulls on Rey’s face and puts on a chinlock before hitting something resembling Abyss’ Shock Treatment (torture rack backbreaker) for two. A boot to Rey’s head gets two and it’s off to a cravate for a bit. Miz hits the corner clothesline but spends too much time laughing at the crowd, allowing Rey to crotch him on the top.

Rey’s seated senton is rolled through into a slingshot sitout powerbomb for two from Miz. Rey comes back with a tornado DDT for the same result and a top rope hurricanrana sends Miz into the 619 position. The kick to the face connects but Rey misses the top rope splash. The Skull Crushing Finale is countered into a cradle for a hot two count. A second attempt at the Finale works though to retain Miz’s title.

Rating: C-. This took a long time to get going but it had a few nice moments at the end. Both of these guys fell so far in just a year as both guys were fighting for the world title just a year ago. The match wasn’t bad but it didn’t do much for me. It was one of those matches that came and went and I won’t think about it again an hour from now.

Teddy Long and Eve, the bosses of Smackdown, leave AJ’s office and seem to approve of what she’s doing. They leave and Punk goes in to find a smiling AJ. Punk doesn’t like the idea of being in a triple threat for the title tonight and thinks it’s happening as revenge for him rejecting AJ’s proposal. AJ just stares off into space and Punk accuses her of disrespecting him but she doesn’t move an inch.

We recap Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus. These two feuded FOREVER and Del Rio never did much of anything. He complained about Sheamus not being high class so Sheamus stole Del Rio’s car. Fake cops beat up Sheamus and that’s about it. It’s as boring of a feud as it sounds.

Smackdown World Title: Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio

Feeling out process to start with both guys tumbling out to the floor. Back in and Sheamus hits a quick neckbreaker and the rolling senton for two each. Sheamus puts him on the top rope for a belly to back superplex but Alberto gets onto Sheamus’ shoulder to escape. The buckle pad is pulled off in the process. Del Rio can’t hook the armbreaker so he kicks Sheamus out to the floor instead. Sheamus is sent knee first into the steps as the crowd is DEAD.

Back in and Del Rio hits a flying shoulder block for two before hooking the chinlock. A kick to the head gets two on the champion and we hit the chinlock. That goes nowhere so Del Rio mocks Sheamus’ chest pounding before the Brogue Kick, only to have Sheamus ax handle him in the head. Sheamus goes up but a kick to the let puts him down again. A kick to the arm gets two for Alberto and the armbreaker goes on, FINALLY waking the fans up.

Sheamus of course is barely phased by it and rolls onto Del Rio to break the pressure. He picks Alberto up into a kind of powerbomb to break the hold, earning himself a chant from the crowd. White Noise gets two and Sheamus avoids a charge in the corner, setting up the forearms in the ropes. Sheamus pounds down right hands in the corner but gets dropped face first onto the exposed buckle. The enziguri in the corner is good for two so Del Rio yells at Ricardo. Rodriguez throws in a shoe but Sheamus intercepts it to knock Ricardo out cold. The Irish Curse hits for the pin, ignoring Del Rio’s foot being on the rope. REMATCH!

Rating: D+. The match was decent but it never felt like Sheamus was in any real danger. The drop onto the exposed buckle and the enziguri got a near fall, but it didn’t feel like a close near fall; It felt like it was there because this is where we’re supposed to have a dramatic kick out if that makes sense. It’s not bad but this feud didn’t need to continue at all.

We hear about Mike Tyson and Piers Morgan having a Twitter war over the main event. I’ve got nothing.

We get a clip from the pre show where HHH tells the referee that the match isn’t ending on a countout or a DQ.

Tag Titles: Prime Time Players vs. Kofi Kingston/R-Truth

I don’t remember Kofi and Truth being champions AT ALL. Truth and Young get us going as the fans chant Kobe Bryant, referencing the joke that got AW fires. Young is taken down by an armdrag and a legdrop gets two for Truth. Truth has to fight out of the corner but gets caught in the face by a big boot for two. Back up and Truth hits a great side kick to take Titus’ head off and get himself a breather. Off to Kofi to speed things up as the crowd still isn’t all that interested.

Kofi chops O’Neil down but a Young distraction lets the challengers take over. Titus clotheslines Kofi down for two before suplexing Young onto Kofi’s back for two. A snap powerslam gets the same for Darren and it’s back to Titus for an abdominal stretch. That goes nowhere so Titus loads up a spinout Rock Bottom, only to be pulled dowin into a DDT. Hot tag brings in Truth to clean house and everything breaks down. Titus is sent to the floor and caught by a Kofi dive, allowing Truth to hit Little Jimmy on Darren to retain the titles.

Rating: D+. This could have been on any given Raw. The Players are a decent team but Titus is clearly the star with Young just being there. Kofi and Truth are just transitional champions before HELL NO would take the championships a few weeks later. Nothing to see here other than a filler before we get to the main events.

Video on Summerslam Axxess.

We recap the Raw World Title match. Punk won the title at Survivor Series but got angry over Rock vs. Cena being announced as the main event of Wrestlemania 28 a year in advance. Cena cashed in the MITB case at Raw 1000 but Big Show cost Cena the match. AJ made it a three way for the sake of tormenting Punk (now a heel demanding respect) for turning down her proposal.

Punk’s complaints about how the title should be the focus and how he wasn’t getting respect are why his heel turn didn’t go well: those are logical points and heels aren’t supposed to be logical. WWE failing to get this is the source of a lot of their problems. Heels are supposed to be bullies or maniacal in their delusions, not making thought out rational points.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. Big Show

Show knocks down both smaller guys as Cole talks about Punk not main eventing a show since December despite holding the title the entire time. Good point actually. The LOUD chop hits both Cena and Punk’s chests twice each with Big Show in total control. They finally work together but Show easily suplexes them both down. Cena is crushed in the corner, knocking him out to the floor so it’s Punk vs. Show one on one.

Punk wisely takes out the knee and fires off kicks to the chest as the fans are entirely behind him. The smart moves are canceled out though as Punk tries a GTS with the obvious result. Cena tries an AA but the powers of gravity take him down to the mat, crushing Cena’s head against the mat. Show chops Punk down in the corner and knocks Cena out to the floor. Punk avoids a splash but tries a springboard cross body like a schnook, earning that powerslam he gets.

The Final Cut puts Punk down but Cena breaks up the WMD, earning himself a spear from the giant for two. Show loads up a double Vader Bomb but only hits Cena, allowing Punk to springboard onto Show for the save. Everyone heads to the floor with Big Show chokeslamming Punk against the ropes, sending him back to the floor. Show drops Cena with a side slam but stares at the crowd instead of covering. Maybe someone was holding up a Twinkie?

Cena actually hits a belly to back suplex on Show and loads up the Shuffle, only to have Punk charge in for the save. The champion drops the Macho Elbow for two on Show but gets launched away. Since covering hasn’t worked, Punk puts on a modified Koji Clutch but Show easily powers out. The crowd has DIED for some reason. Cena comes back in and shoulders Show down, bringing them right back to life.

There’s the STF on Show but the big man stands up to break the hold. Punk comes in with a springboard clothesline to take Show down again, followed by three straight knees to the head in the corner. The bulldog is easily countered (of course) but Cena hits the top rope Fameasser to put the giant down.

We get a Koji Clutch/STF combo and Show taps, but we have no clear winner. This brings out AJ (Punk: “DO THE RIGHT THING LIKE SPIKE LEE! LET THE PEOPLE DECIDE! THEY CAN TWEET ABOUT IT!”) who eventually says restart the match, allowing Show to hit a double chokeslam for two on each guy. Cena ducks the WMD and hits the AA, but Punk throws him to the floor and steals the pin to retain.

Rating: C. The match was ok with the logical story but it was nothing we hadn’t seen before. The restart was pretty dumb as well as Big Show shouldn’t have had a chance to win the title after tapping out. Cena vs. Punk would continue for months which would make for some great matches, but this wasn’t anything special. Not bad at all though.

Various B level celebrities are here. Maria Menunos in a Bob Backlund shirt works very well.

Trailer for whatever WWE’s latest movie is at the point. The Day. Ok then.

We recap the pre-show match to fill in time.

Kevin Rudolf sings the theme song.

We recap the main event. Basically Lesnar tried to hold the company hostage by renaming Raw to Monday Night Raw Starring Brock Lesnar. HHH stood up to him and got a broken arm as a result. Brock broke Shawn Michaels’ arm as well to make it a domestic issue for HHH. This was one of those feuds that people weren’t all that thrilled to see but it could have been worse. More on that later.

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Every time I watch a Brock Lesnar match I remember how scary of a human being he is. We get spotlights for the big match intros in a cool idea. Remember that HHH told the referee to allow a lot of fighting tonight. Lesnar powers HHH into the corner to start and goes for a standing kimura (arm lock that he used to break the arm) with a jumping body scissors. HHH though is a MAN and powers out of it before clotheslining Brock to the floor. Back in and Brock pounds away, only to be clotheslined to the floor again. You know, because Cena can be in a war with Brock at Extreme Rules but HHH can easily stop him.

Brock comes back in and takes the MMA gloves off before taking HHH down to the mat with an amateur move. They head outside with HHH shrugging off Brock’s attacks and pounding away, only to be dropped arm first onto the announce table. Lesnar eventually drags HHH back in for a hammerlock slam. Back to the standing kimura with Brock wrapping the arm around the ropes and ramming it into the corner.

A release German suplex puts HHH down again but he comes back with a neck snap across the ropes. Brock is taken down by a DDT but he goes right back to the kimura and another hammerlock slam. They head to the floor with the arm going into the steps and the rest of HHH going into the announce table. Brock jumps off the table onto the Game before taking him back inside. Of all things, Lesnar busts out a small package for a one count. A hard clothesline puts HHH down but he blocks a suplex into one of his own to get a breather.

Brock misses a charge into the corner but blocks a Pedigree and throws HHH out to the floor. HHH sends him into the announce table stomach first, which is a weak spot due to some real life past illnesses which ended his UFC career for all intents and purposes. More shots to the stomach have Brock in trouble and a knee to the ribs puts him down. Heyman is losing his mind and Brock is in trouble.

The spinebuster puts Brock down and there’s the Pedigree for two. A low blow puts HHH down and Heyman screams that this was HHH’s idea. The F5 is good for two and Brock is stunned. I have no idea why, as you know you can’t get a win off one finisher in WWE. Now the kimura goes on again with a bodyscissors but a rope break means nothing. Instead HHH pretty easily punches his way out of it and hits another Pedigree. Thankfully Brock no sells it and puts on the kimura, breaking the arm again and drawing the submission.

Rating: C+. The match is ok but it has one major flaw: it’s BORING. You don’t bring in Brock Lesnar to have him go toe to toe with HHH. You bring him in to have him destroy small cities and eat villagers. That’s the issue here. We went from Cena surviving against an insane Brock Lesnar to HHH having Brock in trouble in a dull match. Lesnar didn’t seem insane here at all and it made for a much less interesting match. Also, Cena won with a Hail Mary shot, where as HHH can slug it out with Lesnar? That just doesn’t hold up at all. Somehow this would be the high point, as this feud went on another TEN MONTHS.

Naturally HHH gets the big heroic stand up in the ring, but instead of people giving him a standing ovation they tell him that he tapped out. HHH stands there until people finally applaud him. He apologizes to the fans and slowly walks out. I guess this is supposed to be like Austin at Wrestlemania 13 but it’s just failing. The speculation is that HHH is leaving for good. If you bought that, raise your hand to show how gullible you are.

Overall Rating: C-. This is an interesting show as most of the matches are ok but nothing goes beyond that level. Most of this show would be classified as ok at best and uninteresting at worst. It’s just kind of there with nothing memorable other than HHH DEMANDING to give us his moment at the end. Nothing to see here and not worth checking out.

Ratings Comparison

Antonio Cesaro vs. Santino Marella

Original: D+

Redo: D+

Chris Jericho vs. Dolph Ziggler

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Daniel Bryan vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Rey Mysterio vs. The Miz

Original: C

Redo: C-

Alberto Del Rio vs. Sheamus

Original: D

Redo: D+

R-Truth/Kofi Kingston vs. Prime Time Players

Original: C

Redo: D+

John Cena vs. CM Punk vs. Big Show

Original: C-

Redo: C

Brock Lesnar vs. HHH

Original: B

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: D+

Redo: C-

It’s still boring.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2012/08/19/summerslam-2012-lesnar-is-a-wrestler-again-just-like-everyone-else/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Main Event
Date: August 9, 2018
Location: Jacksonville Veterans Memorial Arena, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Nigel McGuinness, Percy Watson

We’re coming up on Summerslam and since he was on Raw last week, there’s no Brock Lesnar to be seen this time around. There is however Roman Reigns, who I have a feeling we’ll be hearing from here. Hopefully there’s some more stuff from Smackdown though, as that show was great. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

No Way Jose vs. Curt Hawkins

Jose has the Conga Line to make him look a little better. Hawkins’ shoulder doesn’t do much good as Jose headlocks him and grabs an atomic drop. A shot to the ribs puts Jose on the floor and Hawkins is rather pleased. Back in and we hit the chinlock, followed by a snap suplex into the second chinlock. Hawkins misses the elbow though and Jose slugs away, followed by a fireman’s carry flapjack for two. The Pop Up right hand finishes Hawkins at 5:30.

Rating: D. I’m not sure how many times we can see this match but I’m sure WWE is willing to try and find out. Hawkins losing over and over, at least in this form, stopped being interesting a few months ago and until things actually change up, there’s not much interest to be had in him. Granted the same is true for Jose, but that’s a little less surprising.

From Raw.

We get a sitdown interview with Reigns to talk about his match with Lesnar. We go through their whole history, including the great Wrestlemania XXXI match, the pretty bad Wrestlemania XXXIV match, the stupid Greatest Royal Rumble match and then last week’s Lesnar segment, which really had nothing to do with Reigns. He’s sick of Lesnar using WWE and disrespecting the fans, so Lesnar is learning a lesson at Summerslam.

This was a long recap of their story, and did little more than tell us that it’s been going on for a very long time. Your stat of the night: Lesnar has held the title 487 days. He’s had five televised title defenses and three of them have been against Reigns. Two of them have also involved Samoa Joe and Braun Strowman. In total, four different people have gotten title shots in 487 days.

From Raw again.

We get a sitdown interview with Paul Heyman, who doesn’t know where he stands with Brock Lesnar. Brock has disconnected his phone number and won’t respond to intermediaries. Heyman looks like he’s about to burst into tears as he says Lesnar is just going to get annoyed at this interview. He considers Lesnar a friend and this isn’t how he pictured it ending.

They had talked about riding off into the sunset together with the Universal and UFC Heavyweight Championships on his shoulders. Heyman starts crying but says just do it. When asked about any potential new clients, Heyman says it would be inconceivable just a week ago, but doesn’t say year or no. He still picks Lesnar, because he’s never been so angry. Reigns doesn’t stand a chance. This was the best thing on the show tonight, mainly because it was actually different.

From Smackdown.

Byron is in the ring to interview Miz, who pops up on screen instead of coming to the ring. He calls Byron a bad announcer and plugs the success of Miz and Mrs., which doesn’t have a single bad review on Rotten Tomatoes. Byron keeps asking about the match with Bryan but Miz ignores him to plug the show. Tonight he learns CPR, which would be a good idea for Bryan because he needs to resuscitate his career. Miz finally mentions it, saying he’s become a star while Bryan has been working in a garden.

Bryan needs this match while Miz needs to be recognized as WWE Champion. Miz is here night after night while Bryan has been off in bed crying. He’s not hiding from anyone and at Summerslam, Bryan is getting exposed as being beneath Miz. Go talk to Bryan about it because he’s probably off eating kale and talking about his wife. Bryan runs into the room, beats up security and punches Miz a few times until a potted plant to the back of the head lets Miz escape. The string of good promos continues tonight, but that kind of goes without saying for these two.

Heath Slater/Rhyno/Chad Gable vs. Ascension/Mike Kanellis

Slater forearms Kanellis down to start and it’s Gable tagging himself in to crank on the arm. Viktor comes in and gets his arm twisted around as well, followed by Gable spinning all over the place into a crucifix. Everyone comes in and the good guys clean house as we take a fast break.

Back with Kanellis kicking Gable in the face for two, followed by Viktor dropping a fist for the same. Gable dives over Konnor but still can’t get over for the tag. Konnor knocks Slater off the apron so Gable rolls underneath the clothesline to tag Rhyno. Everything breaks down and Kanellis tries a rolling German suplex, only to be reversed into the Rolling Chaos Theory for the pin at 9:05.

Rating: C-. Still not a great match but it was fast enough to make things work. I’m not sure why Slater/Rhyno/Gable can’t make it onto the main show more often, or why Slater/Rhyno haven’t been sent over the Smackdown where they need some fresh blood in the tag team division. Kanellis…just hope your wife’s injury doesn’t last much longer.

Video on Ronda Rousey vs. Alexa Bliss, including Rousey going nuts and getting suspended. They meet for the title at Summerslam.

From Raw again.

Ronda Rousey vs. Alicia Fox

Natalya and Alexa Bliss are the seconds. Before the match, Bliss is asked about Rousey and mocks the interviewer for not being able to come up with something better. Fox shows a clip of herself beating up Rousey last week and talks about how great Rousey is at everything else. Was she the captain of the Raw Survivor Series team? Bliss cuts her off and thanks Fox for everything she’s done. Rousey can deal with what’s left of Rousey in Brooklyn and here’s Rousey to cut her off.

We get the Big Match Intros and Fox chills in the corner at the bell. Rousey isn’t impressed by the trash talk and shoves her to the floor. Back in and Fox bails right back to the floor again. A Bliss distraction doesn’t work very well as Natalya cuts her off, only to be posted. Fox tries a charge at the distracted Rousey but the referee stops her for some reason.

Fox pounds away in the corner….and there’s the death stare. The rights and lefts have Fox rocked and the judo throws have Fox rocked. Fox bails for the third time but Rousey follows her for a whip into the barricade. Back in and Fox gets suplexed with ease, followed by the armbar (with a lot of shouting to Bliss) for the tap at 3:47.

Rating: C+. The stuff where Rousey was smashing Fox was fun but this would have been better served as bell, armbar, bell. To be fair though, it’s kind of hard to complain when Rousey beating the heck out of people is some of the most entertaining stuff WWE can do. Maybe not as fun as WWE trying to turn Fox into something worthy of the spot but still fun nonetheless.

Post match Rousey gets interviewed by Bliss tries a sneak attack. Rousey flips her over and gives Bliss a look saying “are you kidding me?” Bliss bails and Rousey promises to win the title.

Overall Rating: C-. The talking was strong with this one and that’s the best thing that could have happened. This week’s TV was better than usual with the promos being entertaining and making me want to see Summerslam. On the other hand you have the pretty worthless original matches but at least they kept those short so they didn’t waste much time. Check out Smackdown instead of watching this though.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: August 13, 2018
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Renee Young, Corey Graves

Now this should be an interesting one as Renee Young will be the first woman to do a full night of commentary on Raw. We’re also in WCW country and it’s the go home show for Summerslam. It’s hard to say what we’ll be seeing tonight as it’s not clear if Brock Lesnar will be around or not (I wouldn’t get my hopes up). Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

No In Memory of Jim Neidhart graphic. Seriously?

Here’s a somber Ronda Rousey to say that Natalya won’t be here tonight. She talks about the importance of fathers, including Neidhart who passed away earlier today. Natalya was the first person to help her out when she got here and Rousey will be the first person to stand up for Natalya in her absence. Alexa Bliss had to cheat to beat Natalya and on Sunday, she’ll beat Bliss to win the title. That’s the same thing Ember Moon is going to do right now so it’s time for a match.

Ember Moon vs. Alexa Bliss

Bliss has Alicia Fox, with plants in her hair and wearing one sleeve of a jacket due to the armbar from last week. Hang on though as Bliss wants to rant about Rousey being such a bully. Bliss is tired of having everyone say Rousey is going to destroy her on Sunday. Rousey has had three matches and Bliss is a five time Women’s Champion.

It’s not fair that Kurt Angle is willing to protect Brock Lesnar vs. Roman Reigns but Rousey is allowed out here during this match. Therefore she’s talked to Constable Baron Corbin and has gotten her own security tonight. Four large guys come out and get in the ring, allowing Bliss to knock Ember into Rousey, knocking the latter off the apron. Rousey beats up the security and the match is after a break.

We’re joined in progress after a break with Moon grabbing an armbar so here’s a promo for Reigns vs. Lesnar. The match wasn’t back on for a minute and it’s off to the split screen nonsense. Back with Moon getting two and Bliss rolling to the floor, earning herself a baseball slide. Back in and we hit a chinlock for a bit before Bliss dropkicks her in the ribs. Bliss gets kicked to the floor again and we take a break, four minutes and fifteen seconds into a match with a minute of that in split screen.

Back with Moon rolling her up for two but getting caught in a chinlock. A basement dropkick cuts Moon off again and Bliss glares at Rousey, who doesn’t seem happy. Moon screams a lot and comes back with the tornado DDT into the snap suplex ala Wade Barrett but Rousey stops to beat up Fox. Bliss actually goes after Rousey and throws her into the barricade in a bit of bravery/loyalty you wouldn’t have expected. Back in and Moon hits a gutbuster, followed by the Eclipse….for two as Fox comes in for the DQ at 12:20.

Rating: C-. All of the cuts didn’t help things but they did the right thing by not having Bliss take a fall there. I was expecting Rousey to come in and get Moon disqualified but this way works better. Bliss being loyal to Fox was surprising as she tends to change friends a lot (Mickie James anyone?) and it was nice to have them not go with the champion losing going into a big match.

Long recap of two weeks ago when Brock Lesnar attacked Paul Heyman (but we need to cut out time from a match for a promo video) and Heyman’s interview from last week. We get some extra footage, with Heyman implying that there might be a way for Reigns to win but cutting himself off and leaving. Heyman turn or Shield reunion perhaps?

Angle and Corbin argue about Corbin making the match earlier. Corbin doesn’t apologize for going over Angle’s head and goes to the ring. Dolph Ziggler (with his hair down and straight for a weird look) and Drew McIntyre come in to complain about Seth Rollins not being here. Angle says Rollins had some travel issues after his publicity tour of China but he’ll be here tonight.

Baron Corbin vs. Tyler Breeze

Corbin is picking both his and Finn Balor’s opponents tonight. Breeze has his old NXT music back for a nice change of pace. Corbin breaks up a wristlock attempt with a hard shove and we’re already in the chinlock. As the hold stays on, Renee and Corey argue over Corbin’s abuses of power. Breeze fights back with a dropkick to put Corbin on the floor, only to catch Breeze coming off the apron.

Graves asks Renee how she can prefer Balor to Corbin, with Renee saying she plays favorites a bit. We hit the second chinlock (someone has to be telling him to do that hold so often as he couldn’t be dumb enough to think it’s a good idea) but Breeze fights back up with a kick to the face. Corbin gets clotheslined to the floor, where he sidesteps a dive to send Breeze crashing to the floor. They get back in and a wicked Deep Six ends Breeze at 4:13.

Rating: D. The ending was the right result, even though it continues this really bad story between Corbin and Balor. I like Corbin using something other than his finisher to get the win here, as it fits the narrative of Corbin being big enough to beat someone that much smaller. Then when Balor kicks out of it on Sunday, he’ll look like a bigger star. Not a good match, but they kept it short.

Post match Corbin praises himself and brings out Balor’s opponent: Jinder Mahal. Actually hang on a second as we’ll throw in Kevin Owens to make it a handicap match.

Jinder Mahal/Kevin Owens vs. Finn Balor

Corbin introduces Balor as the little engine that can’t. Hang on again though as here’s Angle to give Balor a partner.

Jinder Mahal/Kevin Owens vs. Finn Balor/Braun Strowman

I had this written before Angle’s music stopped playing because WWE is that predictable. Strowman gets a heck of a home state reaction and Graves calls him the Meat Castle. Renee: “….the Meat Castle?” Jinder takes Balor down to start as Renee talks about her Monday meditation app. Renee: “Everybody get your chi right.” Balor rolls through a sunset flip and dropkicks Mahal but it’s quickly off to Owens for some stomping.

We hit the armbar for a bit but Balor slips out and knocks Owens down, allowing the hot tag to Strowman. Owens bails to the floor as Strowman runs over Mahal, followed by picking up an unsuspecting Balor and slamming him onto Jinder. It’s time for a big dive from Balor but Owens trips him (or at least swipes at his feet), drawing Braun over for the chase. That’s enough to put Mahal and Owens together for the big flip dive and we take a break.

Back with Mahal holding Balor in a chinlock (the same arm trap one that Corbin uses) before handing it off to Owens for some right hands to the head. That sounds like the time for an NXT Takeover: Brooklyn promo and we’re back WITH THE SAME MAHAL CHINLOCK. Balor comes back with a Sling Blade on Owens and there’s the hot tag to Strowman. After running Mahal over, Strowman heads outside for a lap around the ring, though this time he picks up Sunil Singh and drives him into Owens for a change of pace. Back in, Strowman shrugs off Mahal’s jumping knee and powerslams him for the pin at 14:00.

Rating: D+. As sick as I am of that chinlock, I’m at least slightly interested in Owens vs. Strowman. I’m not sure who is going to win there and they could go either way with the briefcase. That being said, Strowman is in big trouble if they have him drop the briefcase and not become Universal Champion at some point. Eventually you have to win something that matters, and being a failed Mr. Money in the Bank isn’t enough.

Post match Strowman chases Owens off, leaving Corbin to hit End of Days on Balor. For the love of all things good and holy, please let this terrible feud end on Sunday.

Angle can’t get hold of Rollins so here are Ziggler and McIntyre again to mock Rollins for not being here. If Rollins can’t be here for the contract signing, there’s no title match. Ziggler asks to see the contract for the title match to make sure nothing has slipped through the cracks. Angle calls them idiots after they leave.

Here’s a singer named Ricky Roberts, who says Elias is his favorite singer. He’s not very good right not but he’s going to wind up in the Country Music Hall of Fame. With a name like that, I’d expect him to be more of a Rock N Roll fan. Then Elias is going to come find him and he’ll say “Hello, I am Elias.”

Cue the real Elias to shill the What Would Elias Do bracelet and offer his respect to Roberts if he can beat Bobby Lashley tonight. Elias mentions his New York City concert on Saturday and mocks the North Carolina fans, but here’s Lashley to interrupt. Lashley says we already have a no talent musical clown around here so Roberts hits him with the guitar. The annoyed Lashley hits a heck of a spinebuster and glare at Elias. No vertical suplex?

Bo Dallas is doing the math before tonight’s triple threat match when Curtis Axel comes in to tell him to be positive. Dallas panics because the odds are lower against them than usual. Axel: “The odds are always against us.” Dallas has checked the numbers over and over, even DM’ing mathematicians on Twitter. Axel: “You can’t spell Raw Tag Team Champions without B team!” Dallas: “Or a whole bunch of other letters!” They’re going to go out there and run for their lives. B Team!

Ziggler and McIntyre are looking over the contract.

Tag Team Titles: Revival vs. Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt vs. B Team

The B Team is defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Wilder pulls Dallas into the corner to start and it’s already time to take turns on him. Matt comes in pretty quickly though and clotheslines Wilder in the corner (not a splash Cole), followed by a Side Effect for two. After a shout of V1 (little flashback), the middle rope elbow to the neck looks to set up the Twist of Fate. Dawson makes a blind tag though and a Hart Attack (nice touch) gets two. Wilder gets two more off a legdrop and we take a break.

Back with Wyatt hitting release Rock Bottoms on everyone but Axel (and Hardy, but I thought that was understood). Dawson sunset flips Wyatt, sending Axel flying in a German suplex at the same time. Wyatt heads outside and counters Wilder’s suicide dive into another Rock Bottom onto the apron. A dive off the steps from Dallas knocks Wyatt down but Hardy superplexes Dawson onto the big pile. Back in and the Revival reverses a double Sister Abigail into the Shatter Machine, only to have Axel steal the pin to retain at 10:30.

Rating: C. It dragged a bit at the beginning but they got to a nice pace for a few moments there after the break. The B Team retaining is fine and hopefully they don’t have a title match on Sunday. The card is already loaded and there’s no need to do a rematch, or just a two on two title match, and make the card even heavier than it already is. What we got here was good enough and the B Team’s roll continues.

The B Team celebration goes to the back and they run into an unimpressed Roman Reigns.

Ziggler has found an issue in the contract: Seth is allowed to have someone in his corner. Angle is willing to take it out if Drew isn’t allowed to be in Ziggler’s corner. Ziggler lets it go.

Here’s Roman Reigns for his last big speech before Sunday. Reigns says every day he tells himself to leave a place better than he found it. He can’t do that with Brock Lesnar still around though and Lesnar needs to go. Reigns is sick of hearing about him and seeing him so it ends at Summerslam. On Sunday, he’s taking back his Universal Title (which he’s never held) and sending Lesnar so far back into the UFC that his head will be stuck inside Dana White.

Cue a perky Paul Heyman to say it’s a new day, yes it is. If he was going to steal a line from someone on Smackdown though, it would be the Usos, who are the future of the tag team division. He doesn’t actually steal an Uso line, but he’s looking at the future of another division in Roman Reigns. Roman: “This is gonna be good y’all.” After being accused of crying on command, Heyman says Reigns can make history right here, right now. He brings up what he was about to mention last week in the interview: he’s willing to tell Reigns each and every single one of Lesnar’s secrets.

Reigns thinks he can beat Lesnar on his own, but with Heyman in his corner, he’s GUARANTEED to win the Universal Title. Heyman extends his hand and that gets a big YES chant. Reigns says he knows all those secrets already because he won in Saudi Arabia and would have done it a lot faster without Heyman. That’s true and Heyman hopes his sins won’t be held against him. Heyman sees himself as the new advocate for Reigns next week and offers his hand again.

Another YES chant gets turned down as Reigns talks about his father teaching him to swim with the sharks. He also knows how to see someone who is drowning, like Heyman. The thing is Heyman isn’t worth saving so the answer is no. Heyman talks about riding with Reigns’ father Sika and speaks some Samoan, which gets Reigns’ attention. Heyman even has an agreement written up, which Reigns can answer on Sunday.

As Reigns looks at it, Heyman pepper sprays him and leaves. Cue Brock Lesnar to beat Reigns up and put him out with a guillotine choke. Lesnar and Heyman walk up the ramp but Lesnar goes back for an F5. So did Heyman and Lesnar make up or was two weeks ago a big ruse? I ask rhetorically because I don’t expect an answer from WWE. Heyman was great here as usual and Reigns sounded good for a change. I still don’t want to see the match, but they did a nice job here.

Mojo Rawley/Authors of Pain vs. Titus Worldwide/Bobby Roode

Rezar runs Crews over to start and we hit the neck crank, meaning let’s have an inset promo about Rousey vs. Bliss. Back with Akam holding his own neck crank but Rawley comes in and can’t hit a belly to back suplex. Instead it’s a hot tag to Roode for some clotheslines and a Blockbuster for two. Everything breaks down and the Glorious DDT finishes Rawley at 2:47. At least it was short and ended clean, so expect multiple rematches in the coming weeks.

Reigns is getting his eyes washed out.

We get a tribute to Jim Neidhart, focusing on how he broke into the business and the Hart Foundation. Thankfully we get some of Neidhart’s over the top promos and laugh. I was worried when they didn’t even have a graphic earlier tonight so this was a welcome surprise.

The announcers talk about the Hart Foundation, including a mention of their Summerslam 1990 match with Demolition. I loved that one.

Summerslam rundown, including the Revival vs. the B Team added to the Kickoff Show. Better than adding it to the regular show. The Cruiserweight Title is on the Kickoff Show as well, because we NEED three matches on the Kickoff Show.

We look back at Rousey snapping and beating up Bliss’ security, including one running away in a funny bit.

Sasha Banks vs. Ruby Riott

Banks wastes no time in taking Riott down and pulling on her head. A very early Bank Statement has Riott in the ropes and they head to the floor. Ruby uses a Riott Squad distraction and kicks Banks into the steps, with her hand getting caught to really give Riott a target. Back in and Riott twists the hand around before stomping on it as we take a break.

We come back with Riott working on the hand until Sasha runs the corner for an armdrag to break the hold. The hand is hurting, so Banks dives onto Sarah Logan in a big crash. Liv Morgan pulls Banks off the apron so Bayley is right there for the save. Banks hits Ruby in the hand though and a rollup is good for the pin at 8:59.

Rating: C-. They’re going to add something else to Sunday aren’t they? This Bayley/Sasha feud has been running on a treadmill for months now and there’s no sign that it’s going to get better anytime soon. The hand thing was fine but how many times can we see these people wrestle over and over without getting anywhere?

Photos of Seth Rollins in China last week.

Rollins isn’t here so Corbin tells Angle that Stephanie will NOT be happy.

Here’s Angle for the contract signing, though first he says that Lesnar isn’t going to be suspended or stripped of the title, because he wants Reigns to bring the title back to Raw every week. Cue Ziggler and McIntyre to say they don’t believe Angle. He’s already lost one title match since Rollins isn’t here so Angle won’t let the other one fall through. Ziggler says there’s no Rollins here tonight because he’s scared.

Angle intros Rollins twice but no one shows up. McIntyre goes into a rant about why they got together in the first place: to battle complacency from people who think they belong on top just because they got here. People like Rollins are on top of that list because he worked so hard to get where he is. Ziggler would know because he did the same thing. The fans mean nothing though because the second a shiny object loses its luster, everyone turns on you.

It’ll happen to everyone because this vicious cycle can never end because of people like them. Where were they during the hard times? Ziggler knows what it’s like to have someone who has his back and now he doesn’t care about anyone in the crowd or in the back. He signs and here’s Rollins, just a few seconds late because for the first time ever, we don’t have a camera watching people show up.

Rollins has actually been here for awhile but he didn’t want to come out here until Ziggler actually signed. It’s true that he was dealing with travel issues, but they weren’t his travel issues. See, there was that clause in the contract about Rollins having someone in his corner because he’s tired of dealing with McIntyre all the time.

Since there’s going to be a Scottish psychopath in one corner, Rollins better have a lunatic in his. Cue the returning Dean Ambrose, now with a beard and a big haircut (he looks like a less muscular HHH), to a major reaction. The fight is on (with Renee not saying a word) and a superkick knocks McIntyre into Dirty Deeds and Rollins signs the contract to end the show.  I like the new look and this is exactly where the story should have gone.

Overall Rating: C+. The first hour was really, really rough with some flat out bad segments and stories (Corbin vs. Balor makes me want to rip by hair out, especially anything Corbin does) but the rest picked it up a few notches. Ambrose returning helped a lot and the Reigns/Heyman/Lesnar segment was quite good.

The biggest problem around here though is not knowing how to advance and then end stories. How many stories and feuds just keep going week after week and match after match? Corbin vs. Balor, Rollins vs. Ziggler, Bayley/Sasha and Reigns vs. Lesnar among others. That was on display tonight with several matches and segments that I feel like I’ve seen a dozen times already. There were some good ones, but this company needs a seminar in structuring a wrestling story. I’m more interested in Summerslam (at least parts of it) than I was coming in though so we’ll call it a slight success.

Results

Ember Moon b. Alexa Bliss via DQ when Alicia Fox interfered

Baron Corbin b. Tyler Breeze – Deep Six

Finn Balor/Braun Strowman b. Jinder Mahal/Kevin Owens – Powerslam to Mahal

B Team b. Revival and Matt Hardy/Bray Wyatt – Shatter Machine to Wyatt

Titus Worldwide/Bobby Roode b. Authors of Pain/Mojo Rawley – Glorious DDT to Rawley

Ruby Riott b. Sasha Banks – Rollup

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

WWE is saddened to learn that Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart has passed away. https://t.co/Isxv3ElA3Y

— WWE (@WWE) August 13, 2018

 

Egads man.  This has been a rough year few weeks for wrestling.

Neidhart was a good tag wrestler and formed a perfect combination with Bret Hart in the Hart Foundation.  The infectious laugh always helped too and his promos helped carry the team.  How can you not love a beard like that?

Summerslam 2011
Date: August 14, 2011
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17.404
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

This is a pretty big show with the blowoffs to two amazing feuds. The headlining act match is CM Punk vs. John Cena in a champion vs. champion match and the rematch to their masterpiece a month earlier. The match I was more excited about though was Christian vs. Randy Orton in one of the most underrated feuds in recent years. Let’s get to it.

The guitarist from Tool plays the national anthem.

The opening video talks about a domino effect, triggered by CM Punk winning the Raw World Title back in Chicago at Money in the Bank. As a result, Vince McMahon was stripped of power (for all of a few months) and John Cena became the other Raw World Champion. Tonight it’s champion vs. champion and nothing else is worth talking about.

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Mysterio had beaten Miz to win the vacant Raw World Champion so Miz attacked him on Raw to help set this up. This is in during the full on Cole Love Miz period and the annoyance begins early. Before the match Miz complains about not being on the show but here’s R-Truth to complain about various letters. He doesn’t like spiders and Summerslam or Cee Lo Green performing so S and C are on his bad list. Cue Alberto (Mr. Raw Money in the Bank) to cut him off and we’re finally ready to go.

Morrison and Del Rio are both WAY over here but it’s Kofi vs. Miz to get things going. A double flapjack with Morrison helping out plants Miz and we get stereo nipups. Morrison gets all fired up to hammer on Truth because their partnership from a few years ago just means nothing to him. Everything breaks down for a bit with Morrison being knocked off the top rope to change control.

Miz grabs the chinlock but gets kicked in the head to knock him silly. It’s back to Kofi as things speed up and the SOS counters the Skull Crushing Finale for two. Everything breaks down for a bit and Miz hits a Diamond Cutter into a 1%er for two. I’m still not wild on that move but Kofi’s selling made it look better. The heels start taking turns on Kofi with Del Rio starting in on the arm and mocking Kofi’s clapping taunt.

Miz gets two off a clothesline as Cole sings his praises, even listing off Miz’s high school accolades. A double stomp allows the hot tag to Rey, who comes in to a roar. Mysterio starts cleaning house but Del Rio breaks up a double 619. Morrison dives onto Alberto and Truth takes the 619, followed by a top rope splash for the pin at 9:36.

Rating: B-. Take six guys and give them ten minutes to have a fun opener. I like a good six man tag and it can accomplish multiple goals in a short span. For some reason though WWE feels that the only kinds of matches you can have are singles, regular tags and triple threats so we don’t get enough of something like this. If nothing else it gave the fans a lot to cheer about in a short time, meaning they’re ready to go early on. Well done indeed.

Executive Vice President of Talent Relations Johnny Ace (you get tired just listing his job title) wants CM Punk to publicly apologize for embarrassing him on Monday. Punk says he’s sorry and offers a big grin but he turns around to see Stephanie. The champ insults the men in her life but she doesn’t seem phased. Stephanie: “But what would I know? I’m just Vince McMahon’s clueless daughter.” Punk: “Yeah pretty much.” Stephanie offers a handshake for luck but Punk says no because he knows where that hand has been. WHY CAN NO ONE BURN STEPHANIE LIKE THIS TODAY???

We recap Mark Henry vs. Sheamus. This was during Henry’s rampage over everyone in his path and his Hall of Pain period. No one was left for him to beat so Sheamus, a heel at the time, came out and simply said “I’ll fight him.” I still really like that line as it sums up everything and gives you a reason to like Sheamus in two seconds. Simple, yet effective.

Sheamus vs. Mark Henry

Henry shoves him around to start but Sheamus comes back with knees to the ribs and forearms to the back. The Irish Curse attempt is easily shrugged away though and Sheamus is tossed outside. Back in and Henry does the running crotch attack to the back of Sheamus’ head, followed by a backbreaker for your run of the mill heel offense.

An over the shoulder backbreaker keeps Sheamus in trouble but Henry misses a Vader Bomb. That means it’s time for forearms to the chest but a double shoulder puts both guys down. Sheamus is up first and the Brogue Kick knocks Henry to the floor. Ever the not that bright good guy though, Sheamus goes out after him and gets driven though the barricade for the countout at 9:22.

Rating: C+. I like that finish a lot as they made Sheamus look like a real threat with the Brogue Kick and then didn’t have him get pinned. The important thing here though was Henry looking unstoppable as he was on the way to the World Title soon after this. Smart booking here and everyone comes out looking like they should.

Christian has an insurance policy for his match against Randy Orton. It’s going to be a summer blockbuster and he’ll be like Harry Potter. Orton on the other hand will be like Cowboys and Aliens: an overrated, overproduced and overhyped flop. Hey now that movie was underrated.

Cee Lo Green does his mini concert for reasons I don’t understand. Bright Lights, Bigger City is catchy though. Some Divas come out to dance during Forget You.

Divas Title: Kelly Kelly vs. Beth Phoenix

Kelly is defending in your standard Barbie vs. monster feud and has Eve Torres in her corner. Beth on the other hand has Natalya. Kelly goes straight after her to start and fires off some forearms in the corner to send Beth outside, followed by a middle rope cross body to the floor. Back in and Beth knocks her out of the corner to take over before we hit a quick chinlock. An over the shoulder backrbeaker (good move for Beth) has Kelly in trouble and Beth ties her in the Tree of Woe to make it even worse. Kelly gets knocked around in the corner but counters the Glam Slam into a victory roll to retain at 6:33.

Rating: D+. Total squash for the most part here with a fluke ending, albeit the same fluke ending to almost every Kelly vs. Beth match ever. Kelly certainly got her push because of her looks but she was getting much better in the ring near the end of her career with matches like this one being far more watchable than some of the disasters that the division hard around this time.

Stephanie leaves John Cena’s locker room. For some reason we have to see the Cena logo twice for the announcers to catch on.

R-Truth is annoyed about getting ripped off so Jimmy Hart of all people offers his managerial services. Truth agrees but realizes that Jimmy is named….uh, Jimmy, and freaks out. Ron Artest and his daughter are shown watching for a worthless cameo.

Daniel Bryan vs. Wade Barrett

Fallout from Money in the Bank where Bryan won by knocking Barrett off the ladder. Bryan doesn’t have his Flight of the Valkyries (yes Flight, which was the name of his WWE theme instead of Ride) theme song yet and it’s really weird to have it missing. Daniel starts in with the kicks and works on the arm as Booker talks about Daniel’s diet.

Bryan fights out of a wristlock and dropkicks Barrett down before bending Barrett’s shoulders around in a variety of painful looking ways. The running dropkick in the corner and a running kick to the chest, only to walk into the yet to be named (or at least not named here) Winds of Change. Barrett fires off his knees in the ropes and kicks Bryan out to the floor.

Back in and we hit the chinlock before Daniel escapes the Wasteland, setting up a running knee off the apron. Barrett’s pumphandle slam doesn’t work and it’s time for the yet to be named YES Kicks. Again, those chants really add a lot. The guillotine goes on and Barrett gets taken down into the LeBell Lock, only to reach over to the rope for the break. Bryan gets crotched on top though and Barrett hits a quick Wasteland for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B. I still really like this match as it’s two guys beating on each other for the better part of twelve minutes until one of them can’t get up again. Barrett was the bigger star at this point as Bryan really was just a guy in trunks at this point, albeit one with a huge upside. Sometimes you just need a good wrestling match without a lot of meaning behind it and that’s what you got here.

The California National Guard is here.

We recap Christian vs. Randy Orton in a feud that has been going on for months. Christian lost the title less than a week after winning it and then wanted one more match. Orton eventually lost the title via DQ at Money in the Bank, setting up the rematch here with No Holds Barred. This is one of the best feuds in a long time and would have won Feud of the Year had it not been for Cena vs. Punk. It was perfectly put together and one great match after another. The two of them had chemistry together and that’s the most important thing you can do.

Smackdown World Title: Christian vs. Randy Orton

Christian is defending and this is no holds barred but first the champ has a big surprise for everyone as he brings out Edge. After an insane ovation, Edge thanks the fans but reminds them that he can never compete again due to his neck injuries. He was kind of glad that he left when he did though because it opened the door for Christian to become champion.

Christian lost the title five days after winning it and then complained about it for week after week. He just whined until he got his way and then won the title via disqualification. Edge might have done some dastardly things in his time but he did it with some style. Somewhere along the way, Christian became a disgrace to himself. Edge isn’t going to help him tonight and leaves Christian all alone.

Orton starts hammering away in the corner and backdrops Christian to set up the circle stomp and a knee drop for two. They head outside but Christian is smart enough to run away from an RKO through the announcers’ table. Christian grabs the title and runs into the crowd but Orton easily catches him (hint: it’s the guy in wrestling gear carrying a big gold belt) and sends it back inside.

The champ sends him shoulder first into the post (completely legal remember, even though you’ll almost never hear it called a DQ in the first place) to take over. It’s kendo stick time as we hit the standard street fight tropes. Christian misses a shot though and has to settle with an elbow to Orton’s jaw. There’s an interesting story here with Christian not being able to pull off the cheating but doing just fine with the wrestling. Orton grabs a rollup for two but gets caught in a spinebuster for the same.

It’s kendo stick time again but Christian dives into a dropkick to the ribs to keep up the subtle story. Orton can’t get in a stick shot either as the no holds barred rule hasn’t played a big role yet. The elevated DDT is countered into a Killswitch attempt which is countered into Orton’s backbreaker. He can’t hit the Punt but Christian can’t crotch him against the post as Orton uses his legs to pull Christian face first into the post instead.

Now it’s time for the real weapons as Orton pulls out some tables but Christian gets in a shot from behind and sets one up on the floor. Back in and Christian goes up top, only to get superplexed down onto an unset table for a unique spot. It also gets a near fall but that’s not as important. That table is set up in the corner but Christian has to counter the RKO by sending him to the floor. Orton sends him knees first into the steps, only to have Christian send him head first into the steps.

Next up it’s a monitor off Orton’s head to knock him onto the announcers’ table. Like any cocky heel would do though, Christian tries an RKO but gets caught in the real thing through the table for a double KO spot. Back in and Christian gets two off a Killswitch and you can hear the fans going nuts on the near fall. Well deserved too. With the table still looming in the table and another one at ringside, Christian opts for two chairs.

That’s enough for Orton as he takes one away and cracks Christian over the back, followed by a second one to send the champ off the apron and through the first table. Orton brings in the steps and some trashcans but Christian avoids a stomp onto the steps. He can’t avoid a powerslam through the table or a DDT onto the trashcan as this is getting brutal. Christian blocks the RKO with a kendo stick shot, only to have Orton hit another one a few seconds later to win the title back at 23:43.

Rating: A. I love this feud and the matches get better and better every time. There was a great story here of Christian being able to compete in the wrestling but being in WAY over his head against Orton, who has that evil streak in him. This started off as more of a wrestling match with Christian poking his toe into the violence but then embracing it full on, only to be destroyed by the more violent Orton. It’s a great story with a great match to go with it and that’s as good as it gets.

Video on WWE taking over Los Angeles for the week, including an Axxess.

We recap John Cena vs. CM Punk in a narrated video. Punk won the Raw World Title from Cena last month in a masterpiece, only to leave the company with the title immediately after. Cena won the title a few weeks later but Punk came out that night (good thing he just happened to be there), setting up a champion vs. champion match to see who really is the best man. Ignore the fact that they already established that fact at Money in the Bank when Punk beat him in the first place. Due to Punk leaving under Vince’s watch, the Board of Directors replaced Vince as boss with HHH, who Punk hates in general.

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. CM Punk

Punk is defending and HHH is guest referee. As expected, Punk is now a mega face and gets a big old pop, much to HHH’s annoyance. Cena on the other hand is booed out of the building as you kind of have to expect as well. Feeling out process to start with Punk grabbing a headlock for that horribly blatant spot calling. Punk was on a roll at this point but he was as bad as Shawn Michaels at hiding that stuff.

The dueling chants start up and sound even louder than usual, as they should at a major show. Now it’s Cena working a headlock into an armbar before Punk hits a leg lariat for two. Cena takes him down into a chinlock as this is firmly in first gear over five minutes in. The fans tell Cena that he can’t wrestle. True but at least he still is a wrestler and not someone who has been waiting two years for a UFC fight.

Punk finally escapes and puts Cena down for a breather, earning a loud CM PUNK chant. Off to a body vice as this match seems to be collapsing under the weight of the expectations from the previous match. Back up and Punk snaps his throat across the top rope to block a superplex attempt, followed by dropkicking Cena out to the floor. That goes nowhere so Punk grabs a seated abdominal stretch, only to have Cena power up into a spinning slam for a breather. Fans: “FRUITY PEBBLES!”

The finishing sequence is countered by Punk’s headlock takeover but he gets caught in the ProtoBomb. Punk comes right back with an enziguri and a Koji Clutch (I love that move) which is countered into an STF which is countered into the Anaconda Vice (Not a key lock Booker. Learn your details.). That actually gets some near falls until Cena reverses into a crossface to continue this pretty awesome sequence. Punk gets to the ropes and sends Cena outside for a suicide dive to put both guys down again.

HHH, who has been a total non-factor for the first fifteen minutes, gets to nine but can’t bring himself to finish the countout. Instead he throws both of them back inside and it’s time for the big strike off. Cena takes over with a dropkick and the Shuffle but the AA is countered into a sunset flip and kick to the head for two each. Cena’s sitout powerslam gets the same, as does Punk’s middle rope bulldog.

A very weary Punk’s springboard clothesline is countered into the STF but they haven’t traded enough finishers yet. Speaking of finishers, Cena gets two off the AA. The GTS gets the same result with Punk staring up at HHH in shock. Punk comes up holding his knee though but drops the top rope elbow for two anyway. Cena pounds Punk down but eats a running knee to the face, setting up the GTS for the pin at 24:08, despite Cena’s foot clearly being on the rope.

Rating: B+. This match would be remembered so much more fondly if it wasn’t for the fact that they had such a masterpiece just a month earlier. They had to try and follow that up and it just couldn’t be done. The screwy ending didn’t help things, just like having HHH out there for the sake of waiting on a screwy finish that doesn’t seem to mean much since this is a night when instant replay doesn’t exist.

HHH applauds Punk post match and raises his hand before leaving. Punk poses….but here’s Kevin Nash through the crowd to lay Punk out. That means Alberto time and here we go.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Alberto Del Rio

Punk is defending and loses the title to an enziguri in eleven seconds.

A quick celebration ends the show.

Overall Rating: A. This show is nothing short of excellent with only the Divas Title match being short of good (and seeing Kelly Kelly in shorts is never a bad thing). Orton vs. Christian is great stuff with a great story, the main event is awesome, Barrett vs. Bryan is a hidden gem, the crowd is white hot all night and the rest is all worth watching…..until you get to the ending.

That’s where the show falls apart as not only did the ending only make limited sense here but it would turn into one of the biggest messes anyone had seen in a few short weeks. Somehow Punk wouldn’t get his rematch next month because he was busy jobbing to HHH in the main event of Night of Champions.

Oh and Nash? Yeah he sent himself a text message telling him to come out there right then because he wanted one more crowd reaction. That’s how they followed up on the potentially hottest angle in years: Kevin Nash sent himself a text message and HHH pinned CM Punk, setting up HHH vs. Nash, who never fought Punk in this whole thing. Such is life in WWE, or out of WWE actually and you can’t blame Punk after all that.

Ratings Comparison

Kofi Kingston/John Morrison/Rey Mysterio vs. Awesome Truth/Alberto Del Rio

Original: B-

2013 Redo: B-

2016 Redo: B-

Mark Henry vs. Sheamus

Original: C

2013 Redo: C+

2016 Redo: C+

Beth Phoenix vs. Kelly Kelly

Original: C+

2013 Redo: D+

2016 Redo: D+

Wade Barrett vs. Daniel Bryan

Original: B

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B

Christian vs. Randy Orton

Original: B+

2013 Redo: A-

2016 Redo: A

CM Punk vs. John Cena

Original: A+

2013 Redo: B+

2016 Redo: B+

Alberto Del Rio vs. CM Punk

Original: N/A

2013 Redo: N/A

2016 Redo: N/A

Overall Rating

Original: A+

2013 Redo: A

2016 Redo: A

I think we can call this my definitive thoughts on the show as the ratings were almost identical in the last two reviews. Definitely check this one out.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/14/summerslam-2011-that-was-i-need-a-cigarette/

And the 2013 redo:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/08/16/summerslam-count-up-2011-a-screwy-ending-isnt-a-bad-thing/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2010
Date: August 15, 2010
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 14,178
Commentators: Matt Striker, Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

Tonight’s show focuses on one idea: the Nexus Invasion. Back in February of 2010 ECW was replaced by a new competition show called NXT. Eight rookies tried to become the next WWE Superstar with Wade Barrett winning the competition. One night in June, these eight men invaded Raw and took over the arena to end the show. Over the next three months, these men, now called Nexus, terrorized the company and John Cena in particular. Tonight it’s Team WWE vs. Nexus in a Survivor Series elimination tag match. We also have Kane vs. Mysterio and Orton vs. Sheamus in the title matches. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is about how change can affect so many things, such as Nexus destroying everything in sight.

Intercontinental Title: Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler

Dolph is defending and has Vickie with him. These two have fought a ridiculous number of times, even trumping Edge vs. Cena. Ziggler took the title nine days ago with Vickie’s assistance. Vickie’s EXCUSE ME is finally cut off by Kofi’s music. Kingston quickly takes him down and stomps away before clotheslining Dolph to the outside. A suicide dive totally misses though and Ziggler gets a breather.

Back in and the champion pounds away before getting two off a neckbreaker. We hit an early chinlock but Kofi is out of it in a few seconds. Instead Dolph sends him face first into the buckle for two before hitting a Hennig neck snap for two. Off to a reverse chinlock for a few moments until the jumping elbow drop gets two for Dolph.

We hit chinlock #4 but Kofi gets bored and goes off on the champion before hitting the Boom Drop. The middle rope cross body is rolled through, getting a two for Dolph as things speed up. A Fameasser puts Kofi down for two more but he pops up and clotheslines Dolph back down. The champion avoids Trouble in Paradise and hooks his sleeper but the Nexus runs in for the DQ.

Rating: D+. These two are capable of having far better matches if they don’t have to kill time until the run-in ending. Far too much of the match was spent in the chinlockery and it’s a rare bad opening match for Summerslam. Kofi continues his career path as Ziggler is about to start his climb to almost the top of the company.

Ziggler bails and Nexus destroys Kingston. Barrett talks about how Team WWE only has six men but the seventh doesn’t matter because Nexus is going to destroy them. This felt like the opening of Raw.

Jericho begs Mr. MITB and the US Champion the Miz to be on Team WWE. Edge is on the Miz’s other side eating a Slim Jim because Edge is awesome. Jericho says Miz doing this in LA could be bigger than Titanic or Avatar Miz doesn’t seem intersted.

Divas Title: Alicia Fox vs. Melina

Alicia is champion and the flavor of the month of the division. Melina has on a headdress that makes her look like a peacock. She looks….stupid. Melina takes forever taking off her furry boots before we’re finally ready to go. After they stare at each other for a good while Melina shoves her into the corner and then they stare at each other some more. The champion takes it to the mat with a headlock before Melina comes up with forearms. Off to a kind of Indian Deathlock with a curb stomp to Fox followed by a pair of knees to Fox’s ribs.

Some more forearms have Fox in trouble but Melina lands on her bad knee which cost her eight months off. The knee is good enough for Melina to superkick Fox, only to be sent shoulder first into the post. Back in and Fox goes after the arm because she’s not that bright. Melina realizes how stupid this is and makes her comeback with a kick to the ribs. A LOUD scream sets up a kick to the back and kind of a Diamond Cutter faceplant for the pin and the title.

Rating: D-. Both girls looked great but my dear merciful goodness Fox was embarrassing out there. When Jerry Lawler is making fun of you for having a lack of psychology, it’s a bad sign for your match. The Divas division hit a black hole after Trish and Lita left and this was a great example of how bad it was getting.

Post match Josh Matthews goes in to talk to Melina but here’s Laycool to interrupt. They’re the co-women’s champions here after literally tearing the belt in two. They try to take a picture with Melina but she kicks them both in the ribs. Layla trips Melina up though, allowing Michelle to clearly not make contact on a big boot. Fox tries to join in but gets beaten down as well. The titles would be unified next month.

Trace Adkins, Marlon Wayans and Michael Clarke Duncan are here.

We recap Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society. Mysterio had won a match against Punk, forcing him to shave his head. Punk wore a mask to hide it but Big Show ripped it off to humiliate him. Punk’s Society (Luke Gallows, Joey Mercury and Serena) got together and broke Big Show’s hand in a segment much funnier than it should have been due to Big Show’s face while being choked out.

Big Show vs. Straight Edge Society

Three on one handicap match. Punk has already grown his hair to a bit shorter than it is in 2013. We continue the awesome that is CM Punk as he wears a shirt saying “I Broke Big Show’s Hand”, which is a reference to Greg Valentine’s “I Broke Wahoo’s Leg” shirt from about thirty years ago. Show takes off his cast to reveal that the hand is fully healed and to freak Punk out a bit.

Mercury charges right into a chop and Gallows gets the same. The Society has to tag in and out here so Punk calls a conference on the apron. Gallows and Mercury jump Big Show and apparently tagging isn’t required here. Show easily throws away the lackeys and palms Mercury by the head, throwing him over the top and onto Gallows. Punk is the only one left now and a few shots to the back easily put him down. Show misses a chop and hits the steps, giving the Society an opening to go after the hand.

The Society pounds away with really basic stuff as we’re just waiting on the comeback. Punk charges into a back elbow and Show cleans house for a bit until Punk hits a high kick to slow him down. Some running knees in the corner stagger the giant before a double DDT from Punk and Mercury gets two. Punk goes nuts on the hand but Show picks him up on his shoulders. After dropping Punk over the top, the lackeys are destroyed again and Show chokeslams Mercury onto Gallows for a double pin.

Rating: D. Another dull match here as Big Show never once felt like he was in any kind of danger at all. That was the problem with this whole feud: Show treated Punk like an annoyance rather than an opponent. This would lead up to the destruction of Punk in a one on one match next month because Big Show needed that push right?

Kane is standing by Undertaker’s casket and talks about getting revenge on Rey Mysterio for attacking Undertaker. Raw World Champion Sheamus comes in and proposes an alliance but Kane wants no part of it. Kane says Sheamus has guts and they’ll be on the floor if he interrupts Kane again. Sheamus is still a heel here and is actually pretty awesome.

Speaking of awesome, here’s Miz to answer Jericho and Edge’s offer from earlier. Miz doesn’t care if the fans want him on the team or not because he’s the missing link in the WWE chain. Earlier today Cena admitted he was wrong about Miz and brags about Bret Hart begging him to be on the team on Raw.

Jericho gave Miz a Fozzy CD but Miz threw it away. Miz’s former partner John Morrison admitted Miz was the HBK of the team, Edge gave him Slim Jims and Truth wrote him a rap. Miz is the future and brags about how much bigger he is than everything else. He actually agrees to be on the team tonight but the fans aren’t allowed to do his catchphrase with him. Cole loses his mind over Miz’s announcement.

We recap Orton vs. Sheamus. There isn’t much to say here as Orton won a three way over Edge and Jericho on Raw to earn the shot. Sheamus won the title at Fatal Fourway with the unintentional assistance of Nexus. Sheamus has been hurting a lot of people lately and he claims Orton is the next victim.

Raw World Title: Sheamus vs. Randy Orton

Orton is challenging if that somehow wasn’t clear. This is during Orton’s bare arms phase which was always a strange look. Cole lets us know that if anyone interferes on Sheamus’ behalf, they’re suspended. If Orton loses, he gets no rematch. Sheamus shoves him into the corner and shouts in his face. It works so well that he does it again, earning him right hands to the face. Orton stomps Sheamus down into the corner and hits a hard clothesline to put him down again.

Orton drops him with another clothesline and a third to send the champion to the floor. The fourth straight clothesline sends Sheamus into the crowd but Orton has to go back inside before the ten count. Back in and Orton hits the circle stomp for two and a catapult into the bottom rope sends Sheamus outside again. The champion FINALLY gets a breather by sending Orton shoulder first into the steps. They’re doing the methodical build here which implies they have a lot of time.

Sheamus takes over with the power brawling via a knee to the ribs and a reverse chinlock. Back up and Orton counters a suplex but the Elevated DDT is countered into a backdrop to the floor. Sheamus rams Orton’s back into the barricade and the look on Orton’s face is great. Back in and a hard ax handle to the head gets two. This is surprisingly good stuff so far which leaves me with little to talk about.

Sheamus grabs something resembling a cross face chicken wing as is the case with most guys who come out of FCW. That’s one of the problems with one training area: you get a lot of the same spots from guys. Orton comes back with kicks to the ribs but another ax handle to the face takes him down. Back to the chicken wing and Sheamus channels his inner Jericho, telling the referee to ask him. Back up and Orton suplexes Sheamus down but can’t follow up.

They slug it out with Orton taking over. The fans are WAY into Randy here. A bad powerslam puts Sheamus down which Cole calls “A malignant growth of momentum.” Lay off the JR metaphors dude. A superplex gets two for Randy but he walks into the Irish Curse (note that at this point, the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) was called the Irish Curse. I’m using the more well known move: the Rock Bottom backbreaker) for two.

The Brogue Kick misses and Sheamus falls to the floor, only to be caught in the Elevated DDT as he comes back inside. The RKO is shoved off for two but Orton escapes the Irish Curse. Brogue Kick is only good for two which is a very rare sight to see. What isn’t a rare sight tonight is a bad finish, much like here as Sheamus gets himself disqualified for a chair shot.

Rating: B-. Bad finish to a good match here. Sheamus is getting better and better which makes you wonder why they book him so badly in present times. The guy is clearly talented but he hasn’t had to really work hard to beat a guy in months. This was a good match though and they clearly have chemistry together.

Post match Orton snaps and kicks Sheamus low before RKOing him onto the announce table. The fans want Miz but get a trailer for John Cena’s new movie instead.

We recap Kane vs. Mysterio. Kane won MITB and cashed in the same night to win the Smackdown Title over Rey. This was at the same time that someone had attacked Undertaker and left him in a “vegetative state” because we can’t say coma in WWE. Kane swore to find who did it but Mysterio accused Kane of doing it himself. Tonight is the rematch and somehow a way for Kane to prove his innocence.

Smackdown World Title: Kane vs. Rey Mysterio

Kane brings out a casket and I think you know where this is going. Kane hits a quick slam to start but Rey avoids an elbow drop. Rey tries to fire off some offense but Kane easily throws him around. The 619 is easily countered and Rey is sent to the floor. He slides back in and hits a quick baseball slide to get an advantage. Back in and Kane punches him off the top rope before ramming Rey back first into the post over and over.

Kane drops him ribs first over the top rope and slaps on a bearhug to keep things slow. Rey forearms out and dropkicks Kane in the chest, only to have Kane clothesline him down on a 619 attempt. Mysterio is sent chest first to the floor and kicked off a springboard to the floor. Kane follows him out but gets caught in a drop toehold into the barricade. Back in and a springboard headbutt to the chest gets two on Kane but he backbreakers Rey down again.

There’s a nice story going here of Rey speeding things up but Kane easily stopping him with power stuff. Power vs. speed is going to work almost every time and it helps that both guys are very talented. Kane bends Rey’s back over his knee before getting two off a side slam. Mysterio manages to break up the top rope clothesline but a rana attempt is easily blocked.

Now the clothesline misses and Mysterio counters another backbreaker into a tilt-a-whirl reverse DDT (here’s a good example of why Matt Striker is annoying. He calls it a Slop Drop, which is another name for a reverse DDT, but come on: does ANYONE think of the Godwinns when they see that move? Is there some Godwinn fan base out there that he’s trying to appeal to? It comes off like him trying to sound smart without adding anything at all). The seated senton puts Kane down and a spinning DDT gets two more.

A hard kick to the face gets the same but Mysterio dives into an uppercut. Kane opens up the casket to show that it’s empty but Rey sends Kane into the ropes. The 619 is caught and Rey is thrown into the casket but he kicks out of danger. Now the 619 connects but Kane gets the feet up on the springboard splash. Rey stops in mid jump though and gets two off a rollup, only to be chokeslammed to death for the pin.

Rating: C. This was about as good as this match could be. At the end of the day, it’s almost impossible to buy Mysterio as a physical threat to a guy the size of Kane. Yeah something like the 619 could stun him but it’s hard to believe anything but that or a rollup is going to get more than a one count. That’s not to say either guy is bad, but it’s the problem with a guy Mysterio’s size.

Post match Kane wants to make Rey pay for what he did to Undertaker. He promises to make Mysterio hurt for eternity and lays him out with two chokeslams and a tombstone. Kane goes to the casket and yep Undertaker is inside. HOW DID HE DO THAT I ASK YOU!!! Taker asks the half dead Rey what happened but Rey says no. The brothers go at it and Kane beats Taker down, I guess turning heel again and shocking no one. The idea is that Taker is still banged up and doesn’t have his full powers back yet.

Video on Axxess.

We recap Nexus vs. Team WWE. I think I’ve covered this well enough but it’s the first season of NXT coming to the main roster to try to take over the company. Over the last few months they’ve attacked various people and tonight it’s about revenge. Great Khali was originally on the team but was taken out by Nexus, leaving Team WWE with just six guys. Team WWE (also called Cena’s Army) is having a lot of problems with Jericho and Edge quitting over Cena’s leadership, only to come back later.

Nexus vs. Team WWE

Nexus: Wade Barrett, Justin Gabriel, Heath Slater, Michael Tarver, David Otunga, Justin Gabriel, Skip Sheffield

Team WWE: John Cena, Bret Hart, Chris Jericho, Edge, R-Truth, John Morrison, ???

You should know most of the Nexus, though Sheffield later changed his name to Ryback. As for Team WWE, Miz isn’t the last man. He comes out but Cena stops him, because it needed to be someone who made his decision earlier. Instead it’s……DANIEL BRYAN! This requires a backstory. The night Nexus debuted, Bryan was a member of the team. However he got fired for choking ring announcer Justin Roberts with a necktie as it wasn’t PG. Tonight is Bryan’s return and he wasn’t a surprise at all. See, WWE.com actually spoiled the return by mistake, ruining it for anyone who saw the website before the match.

It’s a huge brawl to start and Cole RIPS into Bryan for the sake of Miz. Bryan starts with Young and a quick LeBell (YES) Lock makes it 7-6 in less than 45 seconds. Justin Gabriel is in next and gets to fight Chris Jericho for his troubles. Some kicks to the ribs allow for the tag to Truth as things speed up. A suplex into a Stunner is good for two but Gabriel comes back with a spin kick to the face. Off to Tarver who was about as worthless as you could ask for a man to be.

Tarver charges into a boot in the corner and it’s off to Morrison to clean house with some dropkicks. The Fying Chuck (Disaster Kick) sets up Starship Pain (split legged twisting moonsault) for the second elimination. The remaining five members of Nexus hit the floor for a meeting before everything falls apart. Sheffield gets the nod and easily throws Morrison around. A big powerslam puts Morrison down and some snap suplexes work on his back even more. Morrison tries a comeback but Gabriel kicks him in the back of the head, allowing Sheffield to hit a big clothesline for the elimination.

Truth comes in and another clothesline ties the match up maybe twenty seconds later. Jericho comes in but gets sent into the buckle, allowing for the tag off to Barrett. Otunga is in a few seconds later, before he got good in the ring. Now let that one sink in for a minute. Anyway back to Barrett to crank on his NXT mentor’s arms but Jericho gets a boot up in the corner. A clothesline puts both guys down and it’s a double tag to Slater and Hart.

Old Man Bret pounds away on Heath for a few moments and doesn’t look half bad doing it. It doesn’t have the same snap that it used to but Bret’s offense still looks good. He puts on the Sharpshooter but Wade slides in a chair. Bret lets go of the hold and cracks Sheffield over the back in self defense, drawing a DQ. There really wasn’t another way to get rid of him due to an inability to take bumps. Sheffield staggers to his feet and walks into a Codebreaker from Jericho followed by a spear from Edge to tie us up.

To recap it’s Cena, Jericho, Edge and Bryan vs. Gabriel, Barrett, Otunga, Slater. On paper, this should be pure domination. Gabriel is in to face Edge but after scoring some kicks to the chest, Justin walks into an Edge-O-Matic for two. A big spin kick puts Edge down and it’s off to Slater, whose shorter hair makes him look like an even bigger tool than he does today. Slater pulls Edge into the corner for the tag off to Barrett who hooks the chinlock. Edge quickly fights up and scores with a spinwheel kick but gets caught in a swinging neckbreaker.

Back to Otunga who is almost booed out of the building. A standing spinebuster is easily countered into Edge’s Impaler and there’s the tag off to Jericho. Has Cena even been in yet? The running bulldog sets up the Lionsault and the Walls are good for the submission from Otunga. Jericho immediately knocks Slater off the apron and into the announce table to take him down. Back in and the top rope back elbow has Heath reeling but Jericho almost runs into Cena, allowing Slater to hit his running sleeper drop to pin Chris.

Edge comes in to yell at Cena but Slater rams him into John for a rollup pin thirty seconds later. Edge lays out Cena and Jericho adds a few kicks to the ribs of his own. So we have Cena/Bryan vs. Slater/Gabriel/Barrett with Cena getting caught in the Nexus corner. Barrett comes in to pepper Cena with rights and lefts before it’s off to Justin to crank on the arm. Cena tries to fight back but walks into a side slam from Barrett for no cover. John comes back with a quick fisherman’s suplex but Slater breaks up the hot tag attempt.

Cena hits a hard clothesline to put Slater down and dives for the hot tag to Bryan. Daniel comes in with a quick German suplex on Slater as Striker calls for Cattle Mutilation, which means absolutely nothing to most WWE fans. Bryan backflips over Slater in the corner and hits the running clothesline before sending him to the floor for the FLYING HAIRLESS ANIMAL! Back in and Bryan hits the missile dropkick and counters a rollup into the LeBell Lock to get us down to two on two.

Bryan looks at Nexus but here’s Miz to blast him in the back with the MITB case, giving Barrett an easy pin. Gabriel hits a hard right hand in the corner to put Cena down but Cena comes back with his finishing sequence to take Gabriel down. He loads up the AA but Barrett makes a blind tag and breaks it up with a shot to the head.

Nexus stomps away on Cena in the corner and a big boot from Wade sends him to the floor. Gabriel and Barrett peel back the mats at ringside and a DDT on the concrete knocks Cena out cold. Back in and Gabriel misses the 450, allowing Cena to score a quick pin. Barrett comes in and gets caught in the STF out of nowhere for the final elimination 20 seconds later.

Rating: C+. The match was entertaining and never dragged, but the ending doesn’t hold up when you take it out of the moment. Now one thing that does need to be kept in mind is Cena wasn’t in the match until over twenty minutes after the start so he was hardly banged up until the very end. That DDT on the concrete is a bit too much to take though, as Cena goes from out cold to fine in less than a minute. I can’t quite buy that.

This also brings up to the problem with Nexus: they never really won anything. At the end of the day, Barrett was the only one to have any success for a long time and to this day he’s one of two of the seven here to do much of anything. You have Ryback doing pretty well, but the rest are all midcard to lower card guys who haven’t accomplished much. As of August 2013, Tarver is gone, Otunga and Young are lucky to have jobs, Slater is a comedy jobber and Gabriel is a Superstars mainstay. That’s what killed Nexus: at the end of the day, they were a bunch of jobbers who swarmed big names and nothing more.

Overall Rating: D. This is a pretty terrible show with only two matches being decent at all. The main event is pretty good but it’s absolutely nothing worth going out of your way to see. Nexus fizzled out so badly that their existence is really just a big footnote anymore. Bryan wound up being the big star out of all of them and he was literally on the team for one night only. Nexus would go on to do nothing but annoy fans over the next few months, even with new members and Punk as a leader. The show isn’t worth seeing and thankfully things would pick up next year.

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kofi Kingston

Original: C+

Redo: D+

Melina vs. Alicia Fox

Original: D

Redo: D-

Straight Edge Society vs. Big Show

Original: D+

Redo: D

Randy Orton vs. Sheamus

Original: D+

Redo: B-

Rey Mysterio vs. Kane

Original: C-

Redo: C

Team WWE vs. Nexus

Original: B+

Redo: C+

Overall Rating

Original: B

Redo: D

My goodness what was I thinking?

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/13/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2010-a-one-match-show-almost-literally/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Wrestlemania XX
Date: March 14, 2004
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 18,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Tazz, Michael Cole

We have arrived right back where we started. There is something special about a WWE show in Madison Square Garden and there was really no other option for such a big milestone. You could argue that it’s a triple main event with Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar and Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle, but really this is going to be about HHH, Chris Benoit and Shawn Michaels, as it really should be. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s Raw results and Smackdown results if you need a recap.

The Harlem Boys Choir sings America the Beautiful. That’s one of those Wrestlemania traditions that always makes me smile.

It’s so strange seeing Wrestlemania in an arena instead of a stadium.

The opening video starts with Vince McMahon in the dark and turns into a talk of the history of Wrestlemania. That means old Wrestlemania clips and I’m always good with those. WWE does know how to do these historical videos and you know they’re going to do it well on such a big occasion. The wrestlers talk about the importance of the Garden and how big this one night really is. We go back to Vince with the narration talking about how it all begins again, and the camera pans over to Shane, holding Vince’s newborn first grandson. That’s a really, really cool idea.

The ramp is on the left but there’s a small video screen opposite the hard camera as a nice homage to the old days in the Garden.

US Title: John Cena vs. Big Show

Show is defending for the third time since winning the title in October. Before the match, Cena says he isn’t losing to a gorilla like Big Show and implies that Show has small genitals. They stare each other down and Cena starts sticking and moving in a smart strategy. Well smart enough until Show shoves him to the floor.

Back in and a powerslam gets two on Cena, who gets a very loud chant from the crowd. Another slam keeps the pace slow and Show easily pulls him up for a suplex. Cole is hitting every Show line he can get, including the size 22 5E boot, the typewriter head and the frying pan chop. I don’t even want to imagine how much Vince is in his ear on this show. Cena’s comeback is cut off by a superkick and the standing legdrop gets two.

Show slaps on a cobra clutch and of course Cena fights up after a few moments. A raised boot in the corner sets up an FU (that never stops being impressive) for two and Cena is STUNNED. He’s so stunned that he grabs the chain but the referee takes it away, allowing Cena to hit Show with the brass knuckles, setting up another FU for the pin and the title.

Rating: D+. The crowd pulled this one up a bit though it’s still not a very good match. Show wasn’t exactly going to do anything at this point and that was on full display here. That being said, Cena hitting the FU for the pin was all that mattered and they nailed the finish. What more can you ask?

Jonathan Coachman is walking through the back and runs into a few people, such as Tom Prichard and Teddy Long, before finding Eric Bischoff and Johnny Spade/Blaze/whatever else. Eric has a job for him tonight: go find the Undertaker because there have been reports of strange noises.

Evolution (minus HHH of course) is in the same stairwell where Randy Orton kicked Mick Foley down the stairs to start their issues last June. We see some clips that really set up tonight’s match, mostly including Orton and Evolution beating up Foley and later, the Rock. Orton says it all begins again here, right where it started. Nice stuff here, as you can tell they’re working hard for Wrestlemania.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Booker T./Rob Van Dam vs. Dudley Boyz vs. Garrison Cade/Mark Jindrak vs. La Resistance

Booker and Van Dam are defending and it’s one fall to a finish. Van Dam starts with Dupree and sends the French guy flying off a monkey flip. It’s off to Booker to beat up both Dupree and Conway so it’s Bubba coming in for some more successful forearms to the back. Say it with me: the fans want tables. For those fans who aren’t impressed enough by WRESTLEMANIA I guess.

Booker hits the side kick but Jindrak has the referee, allowing D-Von to make the save. Jindrak and Cade, thankfully in matching gear, take over with left hands to the face but Dupree tags himself in to steal a near fall. The double arm crank allows Conway to insult USA, which fires Booker up enough to hit a spinebuster. The hot tag brings in Van Dam to clean house as everything breaks down. Jindrak breaks up a 3D to Booker, who hits the ax kick into the Five Star on Conway to retain.

Rating: D. For the last few weeks, I’ve said that I didn’t think this warranted being on Wrestlemania. I’d now like to change that to knowing that it shouldn’t have been on Wrestlemania. The match doesn’t even run eight minutes and Booker was in there for more than six of those. Just do the Dudleys vs. Booker/Van Dam, or any of the regular teams for that matter. I mean, the better move would have been to not do the match and let the show be a bit shorter but that’s never been WWE’s style.

Coach investigates the sounds and finds Gene Okerlund and Bobby Heenan (BIG pop for those two) in a small room, pulling their clothes back on. Heenan insists that it’s NOT that kind of thing because they were playing cards. Heenan: “He was dealing!” Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young pull them back in, despite their screaming protests. Heenan: “I haven’t been well! My doctor would never allow me to go!” Coach just walks away. To be fair, this is way above his talent grade.

We recap Christian vs. Chris Jericho. They were best friends and made a bet over who could get together with Trish Stratus or Lita first. The girls found out about the bet and Trish snapped, only to have Jericho say he was falling for her. Jericho and Christian’s team suffered though and he attacked Jericho in the name of tough love. Christian even hit on Trish a bit as well, but then put her out of action with a Walls of Jericho. Now it’s time for Jericho to fight back in the first big showdown.

Christian vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho wastes no time by punching him in the jaw and adding a clothesline for a bonus. A backdrop puts Christian on the floor and Jericho follows him out with a springboard dive. Back in and Christian backdrops him over the top and the big crash has Jericho in trouble for the first time. Back in and Christian cranks on the neck, followed by a chinlock for a change of pace.

A spinwheel kick gives Christian two but they ram heads to knock each other down. An exchange of rollups with an exchange of cheating get two each so Jericho goes with the bulldog. The Lionsault hits knees though and Christian grabs a backbreaker for two of his own. Christian grabs a Texas Cloverleaf to work on Jericho’s recently injured knee, which the announcers don’t actually mention.

That’s one of the reasons I was looking forward to watching this show with the TV beforehand. The Cloverleaf makes more sense when you know Jericho is coming in with a recent injury, but the commentators don’t bother mentioning it here, making the Cloverleaf seem a bit random. Jericho slips out and sends Christian to the floor, followed by a butterfly superplex for a delayed two. I believe there was a botched attempt that has been edited out of the Network version.

They’re both down so here’s Trish, with Lawler saying she can make jogging a spectator sport. An implant DDT gives Christian two and he drags Trish inside. Jericho makes the save and checks on her but Trish accidentally elbows him in the face. Christian’s rollup gives him the surprise pin.

Rating: B. This whole story has always been one of my favorites so it’s cool to see the match be a good one. It’s certainly no classic but Christian winning was the right call and the story can move forward from here. Both guys have gotten something out of this story and Trish is advancing as well. Good match, easily the best thing on the card so far.

Post match Trish apologizes to Jericho as Christian runs back in. Trish tries to hold Jericho back and then slaps him in the face over and over, morphing into Evil Trish (works for me), allowing Christian to hit the Unprettier. Christian and Trish leave but stop to kiss on the stage. This worked for everyone, especially Trish who works far better in this role.

A serious Mick Foley is getting ready in the back but Rock pops in to hijack the interview. Rock is very fired up to be in the Garden and it’s time to have the cameraman see who all is here. We have Hurricane and Rosey (another case that isn’t as random when you’ve seen the recent TV), Don Muraco and Jimmy Snuka and of course the people, with the camera going inside the arena for a shot of the crowd. They’re going to take care of Evolution tonight, if ya smell what the Rock (Foley: “And Sock!”) is cooking. You can tell Rock is extra fired up here.

Evolution vs. The Rock/Mick Foley

The energy is really high here. I always forget how young Foley looks here, mainly because he’s only 38. He retired at 34 so it’s not like he’s some guy who is fifteen years past his prime. Rock N Sock clears the ring to start, wisely making sure to double team Batista. Rock and Flair start things off with Rock offering his own strut. They head to the floor with Flair poking him in the eye (pop for that), only to get backdropped down.

Foley is right there with the elbow off the apron so it’s off to Foley vs. Orton (another pop from the hot crowd). That sends Orton bailing to the floor, because going outside against Mick Foley is a great idea. Back in and Orton get tied in the Tree of Woe for a rather low (Or is it high?) right hand. Batista low bridges Rock to the floor though and drops him face first onto the barricade to take over. Flair comes in (Flair: “All right!”) for some of the loudest chops I’ve ever heard him throw but one strut too many allows Rock to get in a clothesline.

Just because he has to, Flair goes up (Lawler: “Oh no.”) and get slammed down. Batista comes in but quickly allows the hot tag to Foley. Some right hands in the corner have Batista in trouble but he comes out with the big running clothesline to send Foley outside. Orton sends Foley hard (and loud) into the steps and it’s Flair coming in for more loud chops. These are even more impressive with Foley wearing a shirt so the sound is toned down a bit.

Orton rips at Foley’s face and hair as they’re doing a great job at building the energy up for the hot tag. Batista comes back in and walks into a swinging neckbreaker. A double clothesline to Batista and a forearm to Flair are enough for the tag to Rock and house is cleaned quickly. The numbers game cuts him off and Flair loads up his own People’s Elbow, with more strutting than should be legally allowed. It takes so long that Rock nips up and spinebusters Flair, setting up the real People’s Elbow, with a Rock strut because of course, for two.

Orton walks into the Rock Bottom for the same but Batista comes in for a Batista Bomb. That’s only good for a near fall in the same way Orton won at Survivor Series last year. The second hot tag brings in Foley to finally face off with Orton, meaning the double arm DDT connects in a hurry. It’s time for Mr. Socko but Orton grabs the RKO out of nowhere for the pin. Foley looks around to see what happened and Orton is shocked, both adding a great touch.

Rating: B+. This one has really grown on me over the years with all five guys playing their roles well. You knew Rock and Flair were going to ham it up out there and Batista is really starting to figure out the power monster role. Then you have Foley, who came off like the old serious version out there and looked like someone who could still beat anyone on the right night. Orton winning on a surprise RKO was the perfect ending with he and Foley reacting to it perfectly. Just a great performance from all five guys and an outstanding spectacle that paves the way for Orton vs. Foley.

Rock and Foley are upset by the loss but get the big ovation with Foley getting the bigger share.

Video on last night’s Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Heenan’s line of “I wish Monsoon was here” is one of the only things in wrestling that makes me tear up a bit.

Here’s Gene Okerlund to present the class:

Bobby Heenan (still playing to the crowd as he’s presented)

Tito Santana (one of my all time favorites)

Big John Studd (represented by his kids)

Harley Race (somehow looking younger than he did in WCW)

Pete Rose (booed heavily, though said to be incredibly gracious for the induction)

Don Muraco (in a Hawaiian shirt under his coat)

Greg Valentine (bigger reaction than you might think, and WHY DOES HE NEVER AGE???)

Junkyard Dog (represented by his daughter)

Billy Graham (biggest reaction so far)

Sgt. Slaughter (gets a loud USA chant and plays to the crowd as well)

Jesse Ventura (It wouldn’t have been Wrestlemania without him)

This was much more a tribute to the earlier days of Wrestlemania but it didn’t have the big time headliner. Race is the biggest name, but he’s not known for his WWE stuff.

Sable/Torrie Wilson vs. Miss Jackie/Stacy Keibler

They’re all in evening gowns to start, which is totally what I think of when I think of Playboy. Sable wants to just wrestle without anything on but she just strips down to her her lingerie. Torrie and Stacy follow suit as Cole and Tazz are way too excited over this. Jackie won’t strip though and stands on the apron in her gown. So she’s the Ivory of the match.

The gown is ripped off in about five seconds and Sable kicks her in the ribs. Torrie does a high crossbody for the sake of….I’m sure you get the idea. Stacy comes in for a cartwheel (Tazz: “I LOVE CARTWHEELS!”) and the leg choke in the corner. We get the sunset flip spot for an ovation, followed by Jackie and Torrie rolling over the referee. Torrie rolls Jackie up (showing off the tag hanging off the underwear) for the pin, plus a spank and a pull of the underwear. It was short and did what it was there to do.

Video on fans coming from all over the world for Wrestlemania.

Eddie Guerrero is in the locker room with Chris Benoit and says he’s proud of Benoit no matter what. Benoit doesn’t like the word lose but Eddie says it’s a possibility with the people he’s in there against. Nobody really believes in him but Benoit shouts that he does, demanding that Eddie looks at him. Benoit wants to know why Eddie is saying this on Benoit’s night. Last month Eddie won his WWE Title and tonight Benoit wins his. That’s the fire that Eddie was trying to draw out of him because that’s the Benoit he believes in. Benoit is winning the title tonight.

Cruiserweight Title: Cruiserweight Open

Chavo Guerrero is defending and we finally find out that it’s a gauntlet match with Chavo entering last. While they never specifically said so in the lead up, it was implied that this would be a ten way match with everyone in there at once. Everyone comes out and stands at ringside and thankfully both of Ultimo Dragon’s botches are edited on the Network (the one at the entrance is mostly covered by a wide shot but you can still make it out while him slipping on the middle rope is edited out completely). Rey Mysterio is the Flash this year to continue his great tradition.

Dragon and Shannon Moore start things off with Shannon shouldering him down for two. A belly to back suplex gets the same but Dragon avoids a flip dive. The Asai DDT (very similar to a Salida Del Sol) eliminates Moore and Jamie Noble is in third. Dragon kicks him down for a fast two but has to bail out of a moonsault. The Asai DDT is countered into a neckbreaker and Noble makes him tap with a guillotine choke.

There’s no bell like after the first fall but Funaki comes in with a high crossbody, which Noble rolls through for a pin in five seconds. Nunzio comes in and it’s never fun to see family fight. Some rollups give Nunzio two and a middle rope dropkick to the head gets the same. Nunzio is sent outside for a big flip dive from Noble and Nunzio gets counted out.

Billy Kidman is in next and hits a HUGE springboard shooting star to take out Noble and Nunzio, nearly killing himself in the process. Back in and Noble’s guillotine choke doesn’t work but he’s able to break up the shooting star. Noble loads up a superplex but gets revered into a super BK Bomb for the pin and the elimination. Rey Mysterio comes in next to pick up the pace, only to get caught up top. A super sunset bomb gets rid of Kidman and it’s Tajiri in next.

The Tarantula has Rey in fast trouble but he’s out in a hurry for the 619. Akio tries to grab Rey’s leg but takes Tajiri’s mist instead. Rey rolls Tajiri up for the pin and since Akio can’t go due to the mist, it’s Chavo vs. Mysterio for the title. Tajiri kicks Mysterio in the head before leaving and Chavo gets an easy two but Rey is right back up with a springboard hurricanrana. Rey dropkicks Chavo Sr. down and hits him with a big flip dive. A sunset flip has Chavo in trouble but Sr. grabs his son’s hands to give him the retaining pin.

Rating: D. I’ve never liked these things and it was the same case here: if these people can pin each other in a minute or so, why do regular matches take seven minutes? This was another way to get a bunch of people on the show, which is rarely a good sign for a lot of them. Chavo vs. Mysterio would have been fine and I’m not sure how many people care that Kidman and Funaki made the show.

We recap Goldberg vs. Brock Lesnar. Goldberg was dominating the Royal Rumble but Lesnar ran in and caused him to be eliminated. The next month at No Way Out, Goldberg interfered in Lesnar’s Smackdown World Title defense against Eddie Guerrero, costing him the title. Lesnar begged for a match with Goldberg, which Vince McMahon granted, albeit with Steve Austin as referee. With Goldberg off TV, Lesnar and Austin have had a mini feud over Austin’s ATV. It doesn’t help that both Goldberg and Lesnar are gone after this show, which could make this, ahem, interesting.

Brock Lesnar vs. Goldberg

Steve Austin is guest referee. We start with a loud YOU SOLD OUT chant, presumably at Lesnar (who is sporting a very weak goatee). There’s no contact in the first minute so the fans start singing the Goodbye Song. JR has to acknowledge the crowd and mentions Lesnar wanting to go to the NFL as we’re two minutes in with no contact. The fans start chanting for Austin so Goldberg looks at him instead.

They lock up at 2:46 as we hear about Goldberg being an MMA aficionado. The lockup lasts about forty seconds and goes nowhere so Lesnar laughs at him a bit. A second lockup lasts about as long as JR tries to pass this off as a great struggle. They break up again as the fans are now openly booing, saying THIS MATCH SUCKS. Lesnar puts in a headlock five minutes in and the exchange of shoulders goes nowhere.

A double shoulder means a double knockdown, because that’s what this match needed. Lesnar starts kicking away but gets gorilla pressed into a spinebuster for the first big move of the match. The spear hits buckle though and they fight to the floor as the fans think Goldberg sucks. Back in and Lesnar gets two off a suplex, followed by a standing choke after that strenuous….oh I’d say minute and a half.

The fans chant for Hogan and it’s ANOTHER double knockdown until Lesnar covers for two. Goldberg fights up with some clotheslines and the spear for two, despite pulling Lesnar’s shoulder off the mat. An argument with Austin lets Lesnar grab an F5 for a near fall of his own. Lesnar goes shoulder first into the post and it’s the spear and Jackhammer to give Goldberg the pin.

Rating: F. Does this need an explanation? There’s a reason this is considered one of the worst Wrestlemania matches of all time and it’s embarrassing all around. These guys are capable of having a good match and they went out there and put in no effort, instead being satisfied with screwing over the fans who wanted to and perhaps paid to see this match. I can understand two people just not clicking, but I have little patience for them not trying. It didn’t even have the entertainment value of being that bad.

Post match Austin Stuns them both out of the company and neither Goldberg nor Lesnar was ever seen in WWE again.

Pyro goes off from the roof of the building. I’ve been outside for that after Wrestlemania in New Orleans and it will make you jump out of your skin.

Here’s Vince McMahon to talk about the theme of It All Begins Again. There wouldn’t be a Wrestlemania without the fans though and he’s here to thank all of us. The locker room, the WWE and the McMahon Family thanks the fans for making Wrestlemania and the WWE what it is today. This was a very nice little moment.

Next year: Wrestlemania Goes Hollywood.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Rikishi/Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Basham Brothers vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. APA

Rikishi and Scotty are defending and again it’s one fall to a finish. Shelton punches Bradshaw to start but gets taken down by a running shoulder for one. Doug comes in to take over on Shelton with Charlie making a save. It’s off to Scotty vs. Charlie as the fans are just gone after that match (granted this match isn’t helping things). Scotty tries to skin the cat but Charlie catches him, allowing Shelton to jump onto his back.

A bearhug slows things down even more until Doug tags himself in and kicks Scotty in the head. Danny pulls him away from the hot tag to Rikishi but, of course, the tag goes through a few seconds later. Rikishi DDTs Danny to no reaction and gives Charlie a Stink Face. Everything breaks down and Bradshaw Clotheslines Doug. That earns him a Samoan drop from Rikishi, who sits on Danny’s chest to retain.

Rating: D-. Nothing match again but at least this served the purpose of giving the fans a chance to get Goldberg vs. Lesnar out of their system. As was the case earlier though, there wasn’t much of a need for this match to be on the card. It would have been fine as a Kickoff Show match, but even at six minutes it felt long.

Post match, dancing ensues.

Edge is coming back after over a year away.

Here’s Jesse Ventura…..to interview Donald Trump in the front row. Trump praises the show and Vince and Jesse asks him about a donation to a Presidential run. And now we move on to ANYTHING else before this turns into….whatever it’s going to turn into.

Women’s Title: Victoria vs. Molly Holly

Victoria’s title vs. Molly’s hair so a fan has a creative sign featuring Molly with hair that goes up and down. Molly powers her into the corner to start but Victoria chases her to the floor. Back in and Molly gets two off a suplex before grabbing a reverse cravate. The fans are getting a bit more into this and at least have some interest compared to the previous one.

With nothing else to talk about, Lawler gets into a discussion of Molly’s underwear. JR: “What does that have to do with this wrestling match?” Victoria comes back with a powerslam as the discussion moves on to underwear color. Molly catches Victoria on top and gets two off a sunset bomb, albeit landing on her knees first. As frustration sets in, Molly tries the Widow’s Peak, which is reversed into a backslide to retain Victoria’s title.

Rating: D+. They tried here and that’s about all you can ask for. They didn’t even have five minutes and it’s not like the feud had much of a build in the first place. I’ll give them points for being willing to go with a bigger stipulation for the sake of getting on Wrestlemania, which shows quite the level of dedication. Not terrible, but they were hamstrung by the time.

Post match Molly snaps and tries to cut Victoria’s hair but Victoria knocks her out and straps her into the chair. The unconscious Molly gets her hair cut but wakes up in the middle, freaking out as you might expect.

We recap Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle. Eddie won the Smackdown World Title in February and Angle wasn’t happy that a former drug addict was champion. He attacked Eddie FOR THE FUTURE OF AMERICA because the country needed someone who could be a role model as champion. Eddie has been attacked when he wasn’t able to fight back but tonight it’s a fair playing field. I’ve been digging the heck out of this feud watching it back and this is the match I’ve been wanting to see again more than anything else.

After the video, Molly is still getting her head shaved. She’s actually bald too, rather than just having it trimmed. Like I said earlier: that’s some dedication.

Smackdown World Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Kurt Angle

Eddie is defending. A lockup has Eddie driven into the corner to start as Tazz thinks Angle should take it to the mat. Angle headlocks him down but Eddie is out in a hurry with a headscissors. A longer headlock is broken the same way as the fans are in a dueling LET’S GO ANGLE/ANGLE SUCKS chant. Eddie’s headlock is broken up as well and it’s a standoff as they’re still in the feeling out period here.

Some shoulder blocks work better for Eddie as Angle bails out to the floor. Back in and Angle takes him down into a front facelock and this time Eddie can’t get out as quickly. After staying down for a bit, Eddie fights up and armdrags him into an armbar. Angle knees the ribs to break it up and puts on an abdominal stretch. The ribs are fine enough for some rolling verticals, but the third is reversed into Angle’s rolling German suplexes.

They go to the apron and Angle can’t hit the German suplex off the apron. Eddie kicks him to the floor and dive out after Angle but the ribs go straight into the barricade. Back in again and Eddie gets caught in a chinlock with a grapevine to stay on the ribs. A hot shot sends Eddie ribs first onto the ropes and it’s time for the belly to belly suplexes. Angle puts on a waistlock before another belly to belly gets two.

Since the regular ones not being enough, Angle puts him on top for a belly to belly superplex. Eddie breaks that up but misses the frog splash, making the ribs even worse. Angle is getting cocky so Eddie tells him to bring it on. Some right hands just make Eddie madder and he clotheslines Angle down. A belly to back suplex rocks Angle and Eddie reverses a German suplex attempt into a cradle for two.

That earns Eddie a hard clothesline but he reverses the Angle Slam into an armdrag. The third rolling suplex is reversed into the ankle lock this time so Eddie kicks him away. It’s still too early for the frog splash though as Angle runs the corner for a super belly to belly. The ankle lock goes on again but Eddie counters into a rollup. Another German suplex rocks Eddie again but the Angle Slam is countered into a DDT.

The frog splash gets two and you can hear the fans being surprised. Angle gets the ankle lock for the third time so Eddie rolls him outside for another break. With Angle down, Eddie unlaces his boot and backs away as Angle gets back in. That means an ankle lock but Eddie’s boot comes off. Angle is confused and Eddie small packages him (with his feet in the ropes of course) to retain.

Rating: A. That’s a brilliant finish with Eddie keeping his cool long enough to catch Angle being too aggressive in going after the ankle. Angle thinks that he’s better than Eddie and is going to smell blood as soon as he thinks Eddie is in trouble. Eddie was ready for it and suckered the livid Angle in to retain. The rest of the match with a great back and forth chess match with Eddie staying in there until he could get around Angle’s physical advantages. There was some incredible storytelling here and it was one of the best matches either of them has ever had.

We recap Undertaker vs. Kane. Back at Survivor Series, Kane literally buried Undertaker and then gave him a eulogy. Kane proclaimed Undertaker dead and gone, but you know that’s not going to be the case. The Undertaker’s gong went off at the Royal Rumble and Kane freaked out, setting us on a path to this match. We’ve been seeing signs of Undertaker’s powers, which range from creepy to stupid, but that’s standard Undertaker procedure.

Undertaker vs. Kane

Kane’s intro is cool as the New York City set is covered in flames as well. Then Paul Bearer returns with an OOOOOOOHHHHHHH YEEEEEESSSSSS and no one cares about Kane anymore. We’ve got the druids with the burning torches and the fog throughout the aisle. Undertaker’s new look: slightly longer hair, a new hat and a singlet top. Kane looks terrified and….well yeah the Undertaker’s entrance at Wrestlemania can be chilling.

They stare at each other for a bit with Kane trying to make himself believe that Undertaker is real. He reaches out to touch Undertaker and gets punched up against the ropes. The threat of a chokeslam sends Kane bailing to the floor but Undertaker is right back with an elbow to the throat. There’s the apron legdrop as I would expect a lot of signature stuff here. Back in and Undertaker loads up the Last Ride but Kane backdrops him….hands first into the ropes. They misjudged the heck out of that one if that was supposed to be a backdrop to the floor.

It turns into a slugout on the mat until Kane gets in a side slam. The top rope clothesline gets two but Undertaker is right back with a big boot and legdrop. Old School (still not yet named as such) is countered into a chokeslam. Kane walks around though and there’s the sit up. Undertaker hits his own chokeslam (losing the grip on the way down) and the Tombstone makes Undertaker 12-0.

Rating: D. That’s all you could have expected here, save for maybe a shorter and more dominant win. No one was expecting this Kane to beat the returning Undertaker so this was all about a big return. Undertaker was back to his slow pace here, though it was still better than the last few months (if not years) of Biker Taker. It’s not a good match, but Undertaker at Wrestlemania is always worth at least a glance.

We recap HHH vs. Chris Benoit vs. Shawn Michaels. HHH and Michaels went to a draw both at the last Raw of 2003 and in a Last Man Standing match at the Royal Rumble. Shawn, never being able to let something go, said he needed to face HHH again, even though Benoit won the Royal Rumble. Michaels signed the Wrestlemania contract instead of Benoit (contracts still don’t work that way and Shawn vs. HHH is barely six years in the making, let alone the nearly ten Michaels said that it was) so Austin made it a triple threat match. This gets the music video treatment.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit vs. Shawn Michaels

HHH is defending and wearing white boots for a really weird look. We don’t get Big Match Intros but we do have a weapons check. The fans are behind Benoit here, to the surprise of no one paying attention. Benoit goes after both of them to start but Shawn wants to beat on HHH. A way too early Crossface attempt doesn’t work on Shawn, who is sent into HHH to knock the champ outside. The second Crossface attempt is countered into a rollup for two but HHH is back in to clothesline Michaels.

Now it’s Benoit being sent outside so Shawn and HHH can have their big showdown. That doesn’t last long (you save the big stuff for later) as HHH goes outside to drive Benoit into the barricade. Shawn is right up with a moonsault onto the two of them for a big crash. Back in and HHH hits the facebuster on Shawn but Benoit breaks up the Pedigree. Shawn goes shoulder first into the post, again leaving us with two instead of the three.

Benoit can’t get a belly to back superplex as HHH pulls him down into the Tree of Woe and whips Shawn into him for a near fall of his own. HHH gets sent into him as well for the same two but Benoit gets free for the rolling German suplexes. Michaels is right there to break up the Swan dive though, only to eat a DDT from HHH. With Shawn on the floor, HHH pulls Benoit off the top and hammers away.

That’s reversed into a Crossface with Shawn diving in for a save. Shawn tries his own rolling German suplexes on Benoit and I’ll let you guess how that goes. After Shawn bounces off the mat from Benoit’s third straight German suplex, the Swan Dive connects for two. Shawn forearms Benoit to the floor and nips up for the fight against HHH. The champ gets knocked down for the top rope elbow and Sweet Chin Music connects.

Benoit is right there to pull HHH to the floor of course and he sends Shawn into the post. The busted open Shawn (it wouldn’t feel right otherwise) gets caught in the Crossface so HHH grabs his hand to prevent the tap out. Benoit beats up HHH on the floor but gets sent into the steps. HHH loads up the announcers’ table and Shawn joins him to double suplex Benoit through the table. NOW we get the big Shawn vs. HHH showdown and it lasts all of fifteen seconds with Shawn whipping HHH over the corner and back outside.

Back in and HHH (also bleeding) hits a quick Pedigree but can’t cover. Benoit dives in for a last second save and all three are down. A Pedigree to Benoit is reversed into a Sharpshooter in the middle of the ring so it’s Shawn coming back in with more Sweet Chin Music. That’s only good for two so Shawn tries it again, only to be sent to the floor. The Pedigree is countered into the Crossface and Benoit rolls him into the middle for the tap and the title.

Rating: A+. I never realized how much the Wrestlemania XXX match copied this one, down to the big double team through the table, the technical star who had worked forever to get here and winning with a very similar hold, plus other things I’m probably overlooking. Anyway, there isn’t much to say here as the match speaks for itself. It’s long in the right way, the near falls were great, the work and visuals were incredible and the right guy won. I’m sure you’ve seen this one at least once and if you haven’t, find the time to sit down and watch Benoit’s crowning achievement.

Benoit is in tears as Eddie comes out for the big celebration. Confetti falls (another Wrestlemania XXX scene) and JR has almost lost his voice shouting about how amazing this was. The ending is a spectacular visual and what should have been one of the most memorable moments ever.

A five minute highlight package takes us out.

Overall Rating: B+. They were this close to being one of the all time great shows but as it is, they’re only a few steps behind. The positives here ranges from outstanding to very good but the bad is in either absolutely horrid to unnecessary stuff, which is where the biggest problem comes from: they stretched a three hour and forty five minute show to over four and a half hour one and that doesn’t work. If you trim things down a bit here and there, (a Kickoff Show would have been better, or just not putting everything on the card in the first place) this is one of the best shows ever.

The other thing that worked so well here was the feeling. Wrestlemania is a major show every year but this was a milestone edition and it felt like one. They had a great balance of the history, present and future in one night and the whole event came off as a spectacle. That’s the right kind of feeling and the great action all night helped too. This show feels special and it’s worth seeing at least once (if you somehow hadn’t) or again if you haven’t in a long time, though fast forward some of the lower card stuff to make things easier.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: March 11, 2004
Location: Boardwalk Hall, Atlantic City, New Jersey
Attendance: 6,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

It’s the final show before Wrestlemania and we’ve got a guest star with Steve Austin in the house. Tonight should focus heavily on the Smackdown side of things but there’s a good chance that we’ll be seeing more of the interpromotional matches. That’s not the worst idea in the world as it’s not like the blue only matches are the hottest things in the world. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Austin vs. Brock Lesnar, which has turned into the real feud since Goldberg isn’t around at the moment.

Opening sequence.

Here’s John Cena for the opening match but first he has to rap about chasing the US Title like Big Show chases the ice cream truck. Show is a mark for himself and plays Blackjack alone to beat his own hand. Oh and Cena is large in a rather specific area.

John Cena vs. Rhyno

Cena drives him into the corner to start and gets two off the Throwback. Rhyno’s spinebuster slows Cena down but he shrugs off a knee to the ribs. The ProtoBomb sets up the Shuffle and FU to send Cena into Wrestlemania strong.

The locker room (save for the top stars of course) has a meeting in the locker room with Paul Heyman giving a speech. Just like last week, he’s willing to fight for Smackdown because he’s really good for this place. What’s good for Smackdown is good for the wrestlers because it puts food on the table and sends their kids to college. Steve Austin is coming tonight and doesn’t want their kids to go to college.

Austin is here to deal with Brock Lesnar (nowhere to be seen at the moment) and Smackdown can’t let that happen. Everyone better volunteer to help with this because at some point tonight, Lesnar is going to lead them in a battle to defend their turf. No one messes with their Smackdown but no one actually agrees to help. How many times do you think Heyman gave a nearly identical speech to ECW? No one can sell it like Heyman and this was really entertaining. Rather illogical and over the top, but entertaining.

Hall of Fame video.

Rey Mysterio vs. Jamie Noble

The Chavos are on commentary with Jr. trying to figure out why he’s defending against nine guys. Tazz: “Why does the #8 contender get a shot?” That’s a completely fair question and I’d love an answer. Rey grabs him by the hand and walks the ropes for a springboard headscissors but gets caught on top. The sitout bulldog gets Rey out of trouble in a hurry and the moonsault press gets two. The 619 is loaded up but here are Akio/Sakoda/Tajiri for what should be a DQ, but let’s wait for the other cruiserweights to come in to make it a no contest.

Rating: D+. They needed some more time of course but at least we’re going to be seeing something else besides just this match. Noble was just starting to heat up as a face when they turned him heel all over again so there’s not much hope for him at the moment. Mysterio is the real challenger for the title though and really, it should have just been him vs. Chavo on Sunday.

Billy Kidman/Funaki/Ultimo Dragon/Rey Mysterio vs. Tajiri/Akio/Sakoda/Jamie Noble

Joined in progress with Dragon hitting a Japanese armdrag on Tajiri and bringing in Kidman for a good looking dropkick. Chavo Sr. doesn’t want to hear about anything other than his son, which includes Funaki working on Tajiri’s arm. Akio comes in for some more luck with a cross arm choke and a spinwheel kick to take over on Funaki. Some baseball slide dropkicks to Funaki in the Tree of Woe get two as everyone is getting a chance here.

Cole rips on the Chavos so Tazz tells him to go frost his hair in a line that was funnier than it should have been. It’s off to Noble for a hard legdrop as Cole gets on Tazz for not calling the match. Cole: “Nonetheless Sunday, the title on the line with ten men!” Noble’s chinlock doesn’t quite work but Chavo Sr.’s Spanish ramblings make it a little better.

Funaki kicks Jamie away and brings in Rey, sending commentary even further into insanity. A Code Red gives Mysterio two and everything breaks down. There’s the 619 to Noble but Sr. gets on the apron. Jr. holds Mysterio for Noble, who hits Jr. by mistake and a hurricanrana gives Mysterio the fast pin.

Rating: C. That was a lot more like it, especially with the hilarious commentary. Sr. ranting and raving about how great Jr. was and how unfair everything was to his son was tremendous and made the match a lot better. It’s also a good idea to let the cruiserweights shine before Sunday in a match whose rules haven’t actually been announced yet.

Post match, Shannon Moore and Nunzio come in to keep up with the brawling.

Heyman gives the FBI a pep talk about getting rid of Austin but he gets a message saying that Austin is in the arena. Actually he’s at the beer stand. Heyman runs off shouting for Brock.

Long recap of Heyman’s issues with Eddie Guerrero, including last week’s great closing angle with Kurt Angle destroying the helpless Eddie.

Here’s Eddie for a match but first he wants to call out Angle for what happened last week. This is Angle’s chance to get rid of him once and for all. Eddie is the only WWE Champion who tells kids to lie, cheat and steal but since there’s no Angle, he must have no testicular fortitude. Angle isn’t fooling anyone because he’s not coming out here. Eddie talks about being an addict, which is the kind of person Angle would want to take out. Once Eddie wins at Wrestlemania, he’s going to lie, cheat and steal more than ever before. What a weird face, but that smile is more than enough to make it work.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Shelton hits an early suplex and sticks the landing off a monkey flip to avoid a crash. Eddie sends him outside though and takes care of Charlie Haas too, earning Haas an ejection for his efforts. Back from a break with Eddie grabbing an abdominal stretch until Shelton hiptosses his way to freedom. Shelton’s arm is banged up so he has to settle for a belly to back suplex instead of a German suplex.

Shelton whips him into the ropes….and we’re edited to Eddie coming off another rope (he was sent into the ropes on the hard camera side and was then coming off the ropes facing the set) for a faceplant. I’m assuming there was a heck of a botch in there and that wasn’t the smoothest edit in the world. Eddie gets all fired up and Shelton doesn’t know what to do as the comeback is on.

A backdrop sets up the rolling vertical suplexes but the ref gets bumped. Cue Haas to throw Shelton the title but Eddie dropkicks it back into Shelton’s face. Haas and Benjamin get a belt shot each and Eddie drops down so the referee won’t know what happened. As usual, cheating can be smart. Eddie staggers to his feet, smiles at the audience, and hits the frog splash for the pin.

Rating: C+. I remember watching Eddie’s rise to the top of the show when I was a teenager and I didn’t give it nearly the credit that it deserved. Eddie is just so, so good out there with the wrestling being perfectly smooth and the mannerisms being even better. He’s just such a treat to watch and somehow seems to be getting better every single time, if that’s possible.

Post match Angle comes out and motions that the belt is his.

Sable and Torrie Wilson were at the Playboy 50^th Anniversary party. They giggle about their match at Wrestlemania.

Heyman’s correspondents have lost Austin. Orlando Jordan walks through a door and Heyman makes sure he’s going to do what’s right for Smackdown. Jordan says he will, but he respects Austin. Heyman threatens to fire him.

Big Show vs. John Walters/Arch Kincaid

Walters is a minor indy name who has worked for ROH before and was a semi-regular WWE jobber around this time. Both guys get thrown around a lot and the chokeslam Walters in about a minute.

Post match Cena comes in and takes out Show’s knee.

We look back at last week’s setup for the four way Tag Team Title match.

Heyman is very glad to run into the APA as they can do what’s right for Smackdown. They agree, without saying anything specific about what they’ll do.

Rikishi/Scotty 2 Hotty vs. Basham Brothers

Non-title. Doug sends Scotty into the corner to start so it’s a headlock to slow Doug down. A blind tag brings in Danny to kick him in the head though and the Bashams take over without much effort. We’re already in the chinlock, followed by a legdrop for two. Danny misses a charge in the corner and a slide between his legs is enough for the hot tag to Rikishi. Doug gets kicked to the floor but he switches place to save Danny from the Stinkface. He charges at Rikishi….and gets superkicked for the pin. Well that was sudden.

Rating: D. The ending was pretty odd and I’m not sure what the point is in having the champs get a clean pin over some of their challengers three days before the pay per view title match. At least they didn’t have it go on too long though as it’s not like there is anything beneath this on the Wrestlemania card.

Video on Lesnar vs. Goldberg, which has turned into a mess after what should have been a layup. Austin as guest referee really does feel like a last ditch effort to save the thing.

Austin’s truck has been moved.

Clip of Kane ranting about Undertaker on Raw and being told it all begins again Sunday.

Wrestlemania rundown.

Here’s Paul Heyman, flanked by a big chunk of the Smackdown roster. Post break Heyman brings out Brock Lesnar, who calls out Austin for a fight. This is his ring and if Austin is here for some knuckle sandwiches, he better bring a bunch. Cue Austin who backs his truck into the arena and stares down the mob. They step aside and let him pass, even as Heyman shouts GET HIM over and over. Big Show is the only one to stand in front of Austin but, after a staredown, even he lets Austin go.

The locker room leaves and Austin teases getting in but takes the ATV instead. He stops it in the aisle though and turns around, holding up the key. Cole: “That’s the key.” Tazz: “Yeah I know.” Austin wins a slugout and posts Lesnar before throwing him inside. A Stunner takes Heyman down but Lesnar is back up. The F5 and Stunner are countered and the bleeding Lesnar leaves, I believe in his final ever appearance on Smackdown. The ATV is ridden and loaded into the truck so Austin can drink beer to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. This was exactly what you would expect from the go home show, save for the ending which was pretty off, considering it was a referee beating up a wrestler. It was good to let Eddie get something back before the pay per view and the wrestling was mostly watchable. I actually thought Raw did a better job of making me want to see Wrestlemania as this show was fine with a big angle that involved what’s available from one of the biggest matches. Not bad, but it’s time for Wrestlemania.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Summerslam 2009
Date: August 23, 2009
Location: Staples Center, Los Angeles, California
Attendance: 17,129
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

Not a lot has changed in the last year other than some names have risen up the card. Jeff Hardy is the Smackdown Champion and is defending tonight against the on fire CM Punk who is now a heel, bragging about how great he is due to being straightedge. We also have Orton vs. Cena #875 although only their second match here at Summerslam. It’s a decent looking card on paper so let’s get to it.

The opening video is set up like a movie theater, but DX takes it over by making shadow puppets on the screen. Shawn wins by putting up Abraham Lincoln. They finally break the projector but Shawn says he can fix it. He turns it into a DX highlight video but breaks the camera one more time.

Intercontinental Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Dolph Ziggler

Rey is defending after a long but awesome feud with Jericho. Ziggler pounds him down into the corner before getting two off a powerslam. Dolph throws him over his shoulders to the top but Rey bounces off with a moonsault press for two. Out to the floor and a cameraman is taken out via I think a hurricanrana. Back in and Ziggler catches (kind of) a rana off the top in a buckle bomb for two to take over.

We hit the chinlock before Dolph gets two off a side slam. The jumping elbow gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. Back up and Rey drop toeholds him into the corner before, only to have his head taken off by a clothesline for another near fall. A fireman’s carry gutbuster gets two and it’s back to the chinlock. Rey fights up again and hits a hard kick to the head for a near fall of his own. Dolph comes back with a dropkick to take down a flying Mysterio for two more as these covers are getting very hot.

Back up and Rey tries to roll up Ziggler’s body into a sunset flip but Ziggler falls onto him for two. A wicked clothesline gets two more for the challenger but Rey kicks him into 619 position, only to have Ziggler drop to the floor. Back in and the Fameasser gets two for Dolph but Rey gets the same off a sunset flip.

Rey hits a kind of tornado DDT for two more and an armdrag sets up the 619 but Ziggler avoids the springboard splash. Ziggler gets a quick near fall off the miss and the fans are split on who to cheer for. A kick to Rey’s head sends him to the apron so Ziggler loads up a top rope gutbuster, only to have Rey counter into a hurricanrana in mid air to retain the title.

Rating: B+. Excellent opener here with Ziggler being able to go move for move with one of the best high fliers of all time. It was clear that Dolph was going to be a big deal and this was a great example of why. Rey was on fire at this point but he would be derailed by a Wellness violation a few weeks later, forcing him to drop the title to John Morrison.

Jack Swagger and MVP are in the back. Swagger says his match with MVP tonight is a culture clash between the All American American and an ex-con. MVP is nothing but a stepping stone but MVP says he made some bad decisions. Tonight he’s teaching Swagger a lesson and the teacher is an MVP.

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

MVP jumps over Swagger in the corner and hits a quick clothesline for two to start. Swagger rolls to the floor to avoid the Ballin Elbow, only to be caught by a suicide dive. Back in and Swagger gets in some shots to the ribs to take over followed by a forearm to the back. MVP counters another shot with an elbow to the face, only to get caught in an abdominal stretch.

A hard clothesline puts MVP down for two and it’s off to a camel clutch. MVP stands up and breaks the hold with an electric chair for two. This is really basic stuff and the fans aren’t all that thrilled. Back up and MVP pops him in the jaw with a right hand, setting up the Ballin Elbow for two. A big boot in the corner sets up the Playmaker for the pin on Swagger.

Rating: D. The match wasn’t even that bad but it was very dull. Neither guy did anything special out there and it was about six minutes of boring, yet acceptable, wrestling. Swagger would go on to a world title the following year for reasons no one can quite fathom while MVP would do nothing of note for the rest of his WWE run.

Luke Perry is here.

Video on celebrities guest hosting Raw. Did we really have to relive this stupid idea?

Nancy O’Dell from Access Hollywood is here to talk about her ALS charity. No one cares. At all. She interviews Freddy Prinze Jr., one of the recent guest hosts. O’Dell sounds like any other celebrity who has never watched a wrestling show before.

Tag Titles: Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme

Jericho and Show (I can’t stand those combined names) are defending and the belts are unified at this point, meaning the champions have two belts apiece. Jericho says he and Show are the real celebrities here tonight and that’s about it. JTG (how is he still employed in 2013? Seriously, I want an answer to that) starts against Jericho and a nice flip neckbreaker gets two on Chris. A quick Walls attempt is countered and JTG hits a middle rope leg lariat for two.

Todd Grisham: “They bring the right kind of flava eh JR?” JR: “Flava? Like barbecue or cheddar?” Off to Big Show who knocks JTG into the corner and puts on a hard headlock. JTG gets up a pair of boots in the corner before bringing in the much bigger Shad Gaspard. Jericho charges in but gets caught in a gorilla press. The distraction is enough to let Show run Shad over to take control again. A hard chop in the corner puts Shad down and it’s back to the Canadian.

Shad gets in a jawbreaker but Jericho is smart enough to knock JTG to the floor before there’s a hot tag. Show puts on a full nelson but throws Gaspard down to bring Jericho back in. We hit the chinlock before Shad fights up and hits a powerslam to put both guys down. The hot tag brings in JTG but the fans don’t care at all. Everything breaks down and a clothesline sends Shad and Show to the floor. JTG is put in the Walls but makes the rope, only to be knocked out by Big Show to retain the titles.

Rating: C-. The match was ok but I don’t think anyone believed the titles were in jeopardy. Cryme Tyme was a fun team (on occasion) but most of the time they were jobbers to the stars. Jericho and Big Show at least gave the tag titles some fresh life for a few months so I can’t complain about them all that much. The match was standard stuff though.

Punk has a screenplay called the Jeff Hardy Story. In the movie, Jeff survives and beats Punk tonight in the TLC match. That’s as phony as everyone here in LA, where the only real person is Punk himself. Punk goes on a rant against America’s obsession with cool pop culture and says no one makes movies about him because he doesn’t support the Hollywood lifestyle. Punk is FEELING IT here.

Kane vs. Great Khali

Here’s a Wrestlemania rematch that no one was asking for. Kane is the heel here and has attacked Khali’s brother a few times before this. Khali shoves him into the corner to start and throws Kane out to the floor. Back in and Khali clotheslines him down but misses a legdrop, allowing Kane to hit a low dropkick for two. Both guys break up chokeslams and Khali takes over again.

He pounds Kane on the mat for two and hits a hard chop in the corner. Khali charges (and I use that word loosely) into a boot in the corner, allowing Kane to hit the top rope clothesline for two. We hit the chinlock before Khali makes a slow motion comeback and chops Kane down for two. Kane pulls Runjin Singh (Khali’s brother) in and the distraction lets Kane dropkick Khali’s knee. A bad looking DDT is enough for Kane to get the pin.

Rating: D-. Erg why do they keep doing these battles of the giants when they know they’re going to suck? Khali was getting so slow at this point and it was easy to see where the insults about his abilities were coming from. Kane would float around for most of the next year until he saved Undertaker and won the world title as a result.

Slash, Robert Patrick and Maria Menunos are here.

We recap DX vs. Legacy. Rhodes and DiBiase had been destroying HHH for months so he made a call to Shawn. HHH then had to get Shawn out of his job as a short order cook (don’t ask) and tonight is the big reunion match against Legacy.

Legacy vs. D-Generation X

DX comes in on a tank, trailing behind a bunch of soldiers on an Army jeep. Ok points for an AWESOME entrance. HHH starts with DiBiase as Ted fires off right hands in the corner. They have even less effect than you would expect so HHH suplexes him down and drops a knee for two. Off to Cody who walks into the high knee to the face from the Game and slaps Shawn as a result. Shawn gets the tag to a big pop but gets slapped again after running the ropes a bit.

Fed up, Shawn tackles Cody down but gets pounded in the face a few more times. Shawn comes back with a Thesz Press and right hands to another big reaction. The Band is tuned up but Cody bails to the floor and comes back in to a headlock. A belly to back suplex puts Shawn down and it’s off to DiBiase to keep up the punching motif. Ted slams him down to stay on Shawn’s back but Michaels gets a quick neckbreaker for a breather.

The hot tag brings in HHH to clean part of the house but Cody breaks up a Pedigree attempt. Everything breaks down and HHH backdrops Michaels over the top and onto Cody. Ted gets in a cheap shot on HHH to take over, meaning we’re in for a long one here. Legacy takes over o the Game in the corner and the double teaming begins. DiBiase hooks a long chinlock, but HHH keeps fighting to get to Shawn. See how easily that can be done? Instead of just laying on the mat until it was time for the comeback, HHH is constantly moving and trying to keep the fans alive. That’s such a lost art and it’s rather sad.

Anyway HHH suplexes out of the hold but Cody comes in with a DDT to stop the tag to Michaels. Off to a front facelock and of course this time HHH lays on the mat after I praised him for one of the few times after the year 2000. HHH powers out of the hold but DiBiase breaks up another hot tag. You know HHH isn’t going to stand for that for very long so he launches Ted over the top and out to the floor and finally makes the tag to Shawn.

House is really cleaned now with Shawn picking Rhodes apart. The atomic drop sets up the flying forearm but DiBiase breaks up the nipup attempt. Everything breaks down and HHH sends DiBiase into the stands as Cody goes up, only to miss a top rope elbow. Shawn loads up his own elbow but gets crotched down onto the buckle. He can still block a superplex though and now the elbow launches, only to hit Cody’s knee. Shouldn’t that hurt the leg a lot more than Shawn?

There’s no DiBiase to tag so Shawn gets up and puts on a Figure Four, only to have DiBiase make the save. HHH can’t hit a Pedigree as Cody takes him down and actually hits Cross Rhodes on Shawn for two. Now a Pedigree connects on Cody but DiBiase hits Dream Street (cobra clutch slam) on Shaw. HHH and Ted fight on the floor as both guys are down in the ring. Both guys get up at the same time and it’s Sweet Chin Music to knock Cody senseless for the collapsing pin from Shawn.

Rating: B+. Another excellent match here with all four guys working the tag team formula to perfection. Shawn continues to be able to time a comeback like no one ever could and HHH was clicking tonight. Legacy looked great and would actually beat DX in the next month’s match. I was surprised by how well the rookies looked here and DX actually had to sweat a bit here. I wouldn’t say they were in jeopardy but it wasn’t an easy win by any stretch.

ECW Title: Christian vs. William Regal

Christian is defending. Remember Matt Hardy vs. Mark Henry going 32 seconds last week? This is a quarter of that as Christian grabs the Killswitch as Regal is taking his robe off for the pin to retain.

Post match Regal’s heavies Vladimir Kozlov and Ezekiel Jackson lay out Christian so Regal can put on the Regal Stretch.

Video on the Summerslam festivities in Los Angeles.

We recap Orton vs. Cena. Orton has dominated the year and Cena is the latest guy to try to take the title. Not much here but do these two really need a backstory?

Raw World Title: John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Orton is defending. Cena takes him down with a front facelock but Orton counters into a hammerlock. Randy takes him into the corner and kicks at the ribs a bit, cuing a Cena comeback with rights and lefts. Orton comes back with an elbow to the face and his VERY slow stomping. This is the main criticism of Orton around this time: he wrestled in slow motion and it makes for very dull matches. The big knee drop to the chest gets two.

Cena comes back with some right hands but walks into the backbreaker for two. We hit the chinlock and the dueling chants begin. Cena finally powers up and initiates his finishing sequence. The Shuffle connects but Orton escapes the FU into the powerslam (NOT A SCOOP SLAM COLE, YOU STUPID STUPID MAN!) for two. Orton misses a knee drop but Cena’s shoulder block only hits air, sending him out to the floor. The Elevated DDT is good for two as Orton keeps things slow.

Cena gets in another shot and pops up top for the Fameasser, good for two. Orton grabs the ropes to block the FU and a double clothesline puts them both down. They slug it out with Cena taking over and speeding things up, but Orton shoves the referee for the LAME DQ. To be fair though it was the first fast paced thing he did all match.

Lillian, Rhodes Scholar that she is, calls Cena the new champion before saying Vince gave her word that the match restarts and if Orton gets DQ’d again he loses the title. This would be an entirely pointless bit that stopped the match cold. Back in and Orton takes over before whipping Cena into the steps. Orton slams him down and goes to get the title and walk out. We get the same announcement and the match continues again.

Back in and the STF, RKO and FU are all countered and Orton grabs a rollup with his feet on the ropes for the pin. As you might expect, we’re STILL not done as a second referee comes out and tells the first what happened. So on the third restart Cena puts on the STF but a “fan” runs in for a distraction, stopping things cold again. Cena walks around with his hands on his hips but Orton comes in and hits an RKO to retain the title. For real this time.

Rating: D. On top of the INSANE overbooking, the match was really boring with Orton being his usual slow self. These two would feud forever and trade the title back and forth. The matches would get better but people were sick of seeing them fight at the end. This match was a great example of how overthinking can screw up a match. Brett DiBiase was the fan but that was never acknowledged on TV and I don’t think it was ever addressed again.

We recap the main event. This is a pure culture clash with Jeff Hardy being the free spirit and Punk being the serious straightedge guy who lives a very strict life. Punk cashed in MITB against Hardy at Extreme Rules but Jeff won the title back two months later. This gets the music video treatment with a song featuring lyrics of “I don’t want to be like you.” Nice touch.

Smackdown World Title: Jeff Hardy vs. CM Punk

TLC match here. They fight over a lockup to start until Punk takes him into the corner for some knees to the chest. He stomps Hardy down and throws him to the floor before grabbing the first chair. A shot to the ribs and back allows Punk to go up but Hardy makes a quick save. Hardy stomps him down in the corner and hits the slingshot dropkick before going up. This time it’s Punk making the save but Hardy sends him into the ladder to put both guys down.

Back up and Hardy loads up Poetry in Motion but Punk drops him onto the open chair to take over. A series of ladder shots to the back have Hardy in big trouble. Punk sends him to the floor and hits a suicide dive but misses a chair shot. Hardy sends him into the post and gets in a chair shot to the elbow to take over. This is a slower paced match so far which is usually the best way to go about TLC matches. Now Poetry In Motion hits against the barricade and Punk is in trouble.

Hardy puts him on a table but Punk moves before Hardy can splash him through it, sending Hardy down in a big crash. We get another ladder in the ring as JR calls this a carcinogenic match. Punk goes up but Jeff literally jumps over him to go after it himself, only to get caught in an electric chair, only to counter that into a sunset bomb to put both guys down. The champion goes up first but Punk shoves him onto the corner in a SCARY landing with Jeff’s leg hitting the rope.

Punk says on him with a superplex onto the ladder in another cringe inducing landing. Somehow Jeff snaps off a quick Twist of Fate but the Swanton hits knees. Punk hits the running knee in the corner but the bulldog is countered by Hardy throwing Punk over the top and through a table. Jeff starts to climb but Punk is back up to dropkick Hardy off the ladder. They head outside with Punk’s knees being sent into the steps, allowing Hardy to go NUTS on Punk with a chair.

Hardy loads up a table next to the ring and this Punk in the head with part of the announce table and a monitor. A chair shot puts Punk down again as Hardy is in full control. Jeff sets up the big ladder and hits an INSANE Swanton Bomb through Punk through the announce table. That looked NUTS but the crash was great. Both guys are checked on as the stretcher is brought out. Hardy is taken out but Punk is crawling towards the ladder. Jeff gets off the stretcher and goes after Punk, only to be kicked off the ladder in another big crash, giving Punk the title.

Rating: A-. This was an excellent war with a great story being told: Punk played it safe while Hardy lived for the moment and lost the title as a result. The Swanton spot looked amazing and it was the last straw for Hardy as he just couldn’t keep getting up from all these crashes. Awesome match here and a great bit of storytelling.

Punk stands over Hardy with the title in the air and the lights go off. A gong strikes and the lights come up with Undertaker in Hardy’s place. He hits a huge chokeslam on Punk and poses on the stage to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. There’s some bad stuff on here but the good stuff far outweighs it. Its biggest problem is the Orton vs. Cena match which was slow and dull leading up to the STUPID ending. The other big matches delivered though and the opener is excellent. The show is worth watching, but pop in the Cena vs. Orton match from Breaking Point instead. Good show here that could have been a classic with a better Raw Title match.

Ratings Comparison

Dolph Ziggler vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: A-

Redo: B+

Jack Swagger vs. MVP

Original: C

Redo: D

Chris Jericho/Big Show vs. Cryme Tyme

Original: D+

Redo: C-

Kane vs. Great Khali

Original: D+

Redo: D-

D-Generation X vs. Legacy

Original: A

Redo: B+

William Regal vs. Christian

Original: N/A

Redo: N/A

John Cena vs. Randy Orton

Original: B-

Redo: D

CM Punk vs. Jeff Hardy

Original: A

Redo: A-

Overall Rating

Original: A-

Redo: B

The Cena vs. Orton match carries or sinks this show depending on how you look at it.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/08/12/history-of-summerslam-count-up-2009-punk-in-another-main-event-3/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/07/23/new-book-kbs-complete-2003-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6