Smackdown
Date: May 19, 2016
Location: Bon Secours Wellness Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

It’s the final show before Extreme Rules and this past Monday wasn’t exactly the strongest episode of Raw in recent memory. The stories are starting to run out of steam and Sunday can’t get here soon enough. Odds are tonight is going to be about the Intercontinental and WWE World Title stories, which could go a few different ways each. Let’s get to it.

The opening recap focuses on Monday’s oddball tag match and makes sure to show Shane and Stephanie setting it up in case you’re stupid enough to think these matches are just happening.

Opening sequence.

Kevin Owens vs. Cesaro

Miz, Maryse and Sami Zayn are on commentary. Miz gets right to the point and says tonight’s MizTV is canceled. It never ceases to amaze me that they feel the need to change plans from Monday to Tuesday. They slug it out to start as Miz and Sami bicker about Miz constantly getting beaten up. Since this is WWE, the camera keeps cutting to the announcers’ table so we can see them arguing, completely defeating the point of them being on commentary.

Cesaro dropkicks him out to the floor, followed by some chops. Back inside and Cesaro stops for a quick Rumba. I mean of course that’s just a guess as I can’t see what he’s doing because we’re looking at the announcers’ table again but it’s my best guess. Owens bails from the threat of a European uppercut so Cesaro follows him out for the running version up against the barricade. Maryse offers a distraction and Owens knocks Cesaro into the table and then whips him into the steps for a bonus.

Owens mocks Miz’s flapping arms and drops a backsplash for two (Owens: “HOW IS MY CLOSEUP?”). Maryse yells at Sami in French, forgetting that he’s from Montreal. Another backsplash hits raised knees because you can’t hit the same spot twice (makes sense in theory, though Cesaro should have known that the first one was coming given how Owens uses it in every match) but Owens sends him into the corner for the Cannonball.

Back from a break with another shot of the commentary team showing Miz and Maryse kissing. Cesaro fires in an uppercut to break up the frog splash and grabbing a gutwrench superplex to put both guys down. A high cross body gets two for Cesaro as the wrestlers on commentary actually start paying attention and breaking down the match. The Swing doesn’t work though and Owens bails to the floor, only to have him blast Sami in the face.

Cesaro flips off the apron to take out Owens before punching Miz in the face. Back in and Cesaro’s eats a superkick for two but Sami comes in, only to have Cesaro punch him in the face, either over the Helluva Kick last week or to prevent a DQ. The distraction lets Owens get in a rollup with a handful of trunks for the pin at 14:48.

Rating: B-. I’m really digging the idea they’re going with here and it’s actually turned into a four way feud instead of two guys feuding and the other two just being there on the side. I’m actually not sure who walks out with the title on Sunday and it would seem that there are multiple ways to go after the match is over. That’s a hard thing to pull off but they’ve managed to do it with four talented guys doing what they’re supposed to do.

Post match Sami gives Cesaro the Helluva Kick but takes the Skull Crushing Finale.

Paige vs. Dana Brooke

Becky Lynch is on commentary and says her eye injury is the worst thing she’s ever had because the double vision means she has to see Dana twice. Paige knees her in the face to start as we hear about Becky fighting Paige’s mom over in the UK. Dana trips Paige up though and we hit a leg scissors back inside. Becky thinks she should be named Becky Balboa because she keeps getting up like Rocky. Some kicks and knees stagger Dana but she grabs a Samoan Driver for the upset pin at 3:16.

Rating: D+. Dana looked better here but that might be due to how short the match was, which always helps things out a little bit. Brooke has a great look and a lot of potential but she just needs more time in the ring, preferably down in developmental. She’s just been called up too early to be on her own, which to be fair wasn’t the plan until a few days ago. That being said, what the heck has happened to Paige? She’s gone from the top of the division to absolutely nothing in no time. I really don’t get it.

Lana, with that accent dying faster than Paige’s push, says Kalisto is hiding behind his mask and that Rusev is the greatest champion of all time. Rusev says the chant will be MACHKA MACHKA MACHKA.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Sheamus

It feels like we haven’t seen Sheamus in a long time. Ziggler is shoved around to start before coming back with knees and right hands in the corner. A hard ax handle to the face drops Ziggler though and we take a break. Back with another ax handle blasting Dolph in the face before his superkick is countered with an elbow to the knee.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before Ziggler fights up and gets in a Fameasser for a near fall. The neckbreaker is broken up though and Sheamus gets two off the Irish Curse. Back up and the Zig Zag is countered but Sheamus misses a charge, setting up a superkick to give Dolph the fluke pin at 10:48.

Rating: C-. Sheamus has just died since the League split up. I had forgotten that he was around for a bit as he was only in the battle royal recently and then hadn’t been seen since. Ziggler vs. Corbin isn’t much better though as I have no idea why they’re feuding, especially since Corbin should have won in the first place but we need to give Ziggler a fluke win instead.

Corbin comes out to say he’ll hurt Ziggler on Sunday.

The Asylum cage is lowered and here’s Chris Jericho for a chat. Jericho demands quiet by saying QUIET over and over before pointing out the cage hanging above us. Well to be fair no one noticed the cage hanging above the ring on Raw until Ambrose pointed it out so that was kind of necessary. Jericho lists off all of the matches that he’s been in over the years and admits that he’s never been in an Asylum match because there’s never been one. However that means Ambrose hasn’t been in one either, meaning Jericho has the advantage because he’s smarter and crazier.

Jericho asks that the cage be lowered as he talks about how he put Dean in the hospital with a twenty pound plant. Looking up, Jericho adds up the days he can put Dean in the hospital by using all of these weapons, which he sees as at least forty days. That’s not counting all the mental anguish that goes with it, but above all else, Dean is receiving the Gift of Jericho. As the crowd drinks it in, a production worker comes in and of course it’s Dean, who beats Jericho down with a kendo stick to send him running off. Guys in costumes are always an effective idea so this was fine.

And now, a life lesson with Bob Backlund. Bob talks about how Darren should be able to memorize these things and demands that he recite the Presidents of the United States in order. Young: “Coach no one can do that.” Backlund: “Washington, Adams, Jefferson….” Young swears a bit and Backlund LOSES IT, saying that no one needs that kind of language and demands 200 jumping jacks because Young needs to be great in the ring. These are really funny bits and I’m sure that Young in front of a blue background and Backlund in front of a red one is coincidental.

Big Cass/New Day vs. Dudley Boyz/Vaudevillains

The announcers are flat out saying that Cass has been doing better since Enzo has been gone. During the entrances, we see the Vaudevillains destroying the time machine, which messes up the announcers’ audio for some reason. D-Von and Big E. get things going with the latter getting two off a belly to belly. Byron’s audio is still barely audible as D-Von runs Kofi over and brings in Bubba, who misses a splash attempt. It’s time for the Unicorn Stampede before a big staredown takes us to a break.

Back with Woods hammering on Bubba in the corner until Ray clotheslines him down. Byron’s audio is back because we’re just that lucky. The Vaudevillains starts taking over now with Gotch snapmaring Woods so English can drop a knee for two. The Dudleyz don’t seem thrilled with their lack of ring time here as Bubba shouts at Gotch for tagging in English instead of D-Von.

Bubba comes in instead and punches away while shouting about Bootyo’s. Woods finally gets away and makes the hot tag off to Cass for the house cleaning. Everything breaks down and Big E. suplexes Gotch before throwing Kofi over the top onto English. A pretty horrible looking East River Crossing (mostly botched as Bubba is a bit too big) sets up the Empire Elbow to give Cass the pin at 10:38.

Rating: C. I’d be really surprised if they don’t give Cass a spot on Sunday’s card in an added match. They certainly seem to be pushing him at this point and it’s really cool to see someone this young and brand new on the roster getting such a shot. I don’t know if he has everything to make it work but at least he’s getting a good start.

John Cena is back on May 30.

Long video on Natalya vs. Charlotte on Sunday with Charlotte talking about how she’ll be twice as good as her dad because she uses the Figure Eight instead of the Figure Four.

Luke Gallows vs. Roman Reigns

Non-title. Usos vs. Anderson/Gallows in a Texas Tornado match is official for Sunday. Sweet goodness just stop already. Anderson/Styles/Usos, the latter again without the Siva Tau, are at ringside here. They trade elbows to start but only Reigns goes down. A second elbow knocks him outside so Reigns comes back inside where his Samoan drop gets two. We take a break and come back with Reigns firing off kicks to the ribs until Gallows takes his head off with a clothesline for a near fall of his own.

We hit the chinlock for a bit before a corner splash crushes Reigns again. That’s enough action so we hit the chinlock again. Roman gets up for a jumping clothesline but AJ’s distraction lets Gallows get in a rollup for two. There’s the Superman punch but AJ grabs Reigns’ foot to break up the spear. Everything breaks down on the floor with Reigns kicking AJ in the face, only to walk into the Gallows’ Pole (chokebomb) for a very close two. Anderson comes in and that’s a DQ at 11:50, despite him not touching anything.

Rating: C+. Not a bad power brawl but you knew the ending was going to be screwy. I have no idea why they couldn’t just wait until Anderson actually did something before getting to the DQ but anything that lets these six brawl more is the right idea in WWE’s eyes. That being said, it would be nice if Anderson and Gallows could actually, you know, WIN SOMETHING eventually.

Post match Anderson gives Reigns the Boot of Doom and the fight keeps going. AJ is the only man standing but he takes too long loading up the announcers’ table. Reigns gets in a few shots but everyone else gets back in it to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. Thank goodness it’s over. This wasn’t even a bad show or even a below average show. It was just incredibly boring for one simple reason: this is all padding instead of ANYTHING worthwhile (save for a decent Ambrose/Jericho segment). We’ve seen the opening match in various forms time after time, Dana doesn’t have a match on Sunday, Ziggler vs. Corbin has been done multiple times, Big Cass vs. New Day isn’t a match as far as I know and the main event stuff has been done to death.

I don’t remember the last time a company just ran out of steam like this the week before a pay per view but it’s been a rough two shows. Hopefully they don’t try to stretch these stories out through June as I don’t even want to imagine what we might have to sit through in that case. The quality was fine tonight but there’s just nothing interesting going on here.

Results

Kevin Owens b. Cesaro – Rollup with a handful of trunks

Dana Brooke b. Paige – Samoan Driver

Dolph Ziggler b. Sheamus – Superkick

Big Cass/New Day b. Dudley Boyz/Vaudevillains – Empire Elbow to Bubba Ray

Roman Reigns b. Luke Gallows via DQ when Karl Anderson interfered

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Looking at how gimmick matches can be done very, very badly.

http://wrestlingrumors.net/kbs-review-unlocking-the-gimmick-cage/

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 16, 2016
Location: Greensboro Coliseum Complex, Greensboro, Coliseum
Commentators; John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole, Byron Saxton

It’s the go home show for Extreme Rules 2016 and the only match announced for tonight is the Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows. For those of you not counting, this is the seventh time these teams have been in a match together since April 25, or once for ever Raw/Smackdown in that span. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s AJ Styles to open things up. AJ is tired of Roman Reigns lying about him and he shows us TWEETS to prove that Reigns is saying AJ is in league with Anderson and Gallows. Apparently this is getting to him because it’s a new era and he’s tired of the same old stuff. He didn’t need anyone’s help to get to the top spot in the Tokyo Dome in front of 60,000 people and he doesn’t need anyone’s help to get where he’ll be on Sunday. Cue Reigns to interrupt to say AJ is indeed phenomenal.

Reigns gets annoyed with a WE WANT ROLLINS chant and says he’ll be in the Usos’ corner tonight. AJ will be in his buddies’ corner and cuts Roman’s “the guy” speech off. Reigns is indeed the guy…..that AJ is going to beat on Sunday. Roman shrugs it off and says he can do everything he wants to on Sunday. That’s going to prove that the bloodline (might be the new name for Reigns and the Usos) is stronger than the Club. Cue Gallows and Anderson but the Usos run in as well, only to have Reigns blast AJ in the face to send the Club away.

Cesaro vs. Sami Zayn

Miz and Owens are on commentary for the always brilliant FIVE MAN BOOTH. This is the aftermath of Zayn accidentally kicking Cesaro, his partner at the time, in the face on Smackdown to cost them a match. Cesaro starts fast and powerslams Sami for two but gets sent to the floor, allowing Sami to tease the dive. Instead it’s the springboard moonsault back inside as Owens walks off commentary because he “doesn’t care about this match”. Instead Owens goes after Miz and walks off with the Intercontinental Title. Miz goes after Owens to start a brawl and they get inside to draw the no contest at 1:47.

Cue Shane to make it a tag match which they completely couldn’t have done in the first place. Oh wait we’re not done though as Stephanie comes out to say it would be more interesting if the teams were Miz/Cesaro vs. Sami/Owens and if Owens walks out, he’s not in the title match on Sunday.

Cesaro/Miz vs. Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens

Joined in progress with Cesaro escaping Kevin’s headlock and trying the Swing. Owens slaps Sami to bring him in to face Miz but Sami and Owens keep yelling at each other. One such argument results in Sami being knocked off the apron and into the barricade, which seems to bang up his shoulder as we take a break. Back with Miz hitting the running corner clothesline on Sami and bringing in Cesaro to pick the bones with a running clothesline of his own (not a splash Cole, you dingbat).

Miz comes back in and punches Sami into the corner for the tag off to Owens for the big face comeback. There is money in a face run from Owens with him destroying everyone in sight and being built up for a big match. Cesaro comes in for the running uppercuts as everything breaks down. Miz sends Cesaro out to the floor to try his own Swing, only to have Cesaro give Miz the Skull Crushing Finale. The Helluva Kick puts Miz away at 10:47.

Rating: C+. I liked this more than I was expecting to after we spent five minutes watching Stephanie and Shane have a board meeting to set up a match. The idea of the guys doing each others’ moves was a bit of a surprise and a different idea and you had Owens being amazing to carry the thing. Also I’m fine with the champion losing in a tag match, especially after his own partner turned on him.

Owens lays Sami out post match and insists that his hand be raised because he won too.

Chris Jericho is furious at Dean for destroying a jacket more iconic to the WWE than Andre the Giant. He should call the cops but he’ll deal with this himself.

Video on Apollo Crews.

Shining Stars vs. Scott Jackson/Brian Kennedy

The jobbers are Corey Hollis/John Skyler from NXT. The Shining Stars are Primo/Epico as wrestling travelogues from Puerto Rico. JBL: “THEY’RE FINALLY HERE!” Primo says the ring is their paradise and they welcome tourists like these people from right here in North Carolina. Primo grabs Jackson to start before it’s off to Epico for two suplexes into a brainbuster. A hard shot to the face drops Kennedy and a butterfly suplex into a gutbuster makes things even worse. The Shining Star (Total Elimination) puts Kennedy away at 1:35.

The Shining Stars invite us to Puerto Rico.

Here’s Dean Ambrose, sporting a black eye, to call out Jericho. Chris is right there to tell Dean to shut his mouth. Jericho demands an apology to go with fifteen grand but first Chris has to tell the fans to be quiet. The apology isn’t happening because Dean wants a match at Extreme Rules. Jericho: “Just as I expected.” The match is on but Dean doesn’t know if Jericho is up to getting extreme anymore.

Jericho lists off his resume and accepts, so Dean has a cage lowered. BOY, IT’S A GOOD THING THAT WAS READY AND COMPLETELY NOT NOTICED ALL NIGHT LONG. There are weapons attached to the cage (including a mop and a potted plant), which Dean has dubbed the Asylum. Dean gives a long speech about how violent this is going to be while the announcers act like there has never been a match like this before. Yeah a weapons cage match is such an insane idea, though to be fair I’d try to forget the Extreme Elimination Chamber as well.

We recap the opening sequence.

Dana Brooke insults some people for not being in good enough shape.

Dana Brooke vs. Becky Lynch

In case their match on Smackdown wasn’t bad enough for you. No Emma here as she’s legitimately injured, which the announcers actually acknowledge. Becky kicks her out to the floor but Dana sends her head first into the barricade. A modified seated abdominal stretch has Becky in trouble but she comes back with the Bexploder. Dana counters a sunset flip out of the corner and sits down for the pin at 3:45.

Rating: D+. Dana is in a very weird place right now as she was brought up to team with Emma but the injury has completely derailed that idea. The problem is that Dana isn’t anywhere near ready for this level on her own and needs a lot more time down in NXT. They would be smart to pull the plug on this and send her back down but WWE isn’t normally that smart.

We get the same Life Lesson with Bob Backlund from Smackdown with Backlund not understanding smartphones and telling Darren to put his desktop on the desk and his mail in the mailbox. In other words, there’s still no reason to watch Smackdown.

Shane and Stephanie are watching the Backlund ad when Stephanie gets annoyed at him for not bringing up the Asylum match. The Dudley Boyz come in to mention the Attitude Era, which gets one of them a match with Colin Cassady.

Video on Golden Truth FINALLY getting together after five months, capped off by this past Thursday when Fandango and Tyler Breeze turned on them.

Golden Truth vs. Breezango

Truth goes after Breeze to start but gets knocked down in the corner, allowing Fandango to come in and smash him in the face. A double clothesline puts both guys down so it’s off to Goldust vs. Breeze. Goldust starts cleaning house and everything breaks down, only to have Truth kick Goldust by mistake, allowing Breeze to get the pin at 1:58. For some reason the loss was very entertaining.

Post break Goldust doesn’t think the team has any future. Truth thinks they need to get the creative juices flowing and that they need to get their “fing shooie” in line. Everyone wants the Golden Truth but here are Breeze and Fandango to say the new era is passing them by. That’s enough to convince Goldust to stick with it.

Here’s New Day for a chat and there’s something under a curtain behind them. They’re not sure what’s up with the Vaudevillains being from a new era…..so Woods has built a time machine. Big E: “That’s clearly an old refrigerator box.” Woods: “IT’S THE NEW DAYLOREAN!” Big E. thinks the keyboard is from Woods’ parents house. Big E.: “WHY IS IT STICKY???”

They get inside and Kofi comes out to his SOS theme with a Jamaican accent. Woods pulls him back in, despite Kofi’s protests that 2009 was his best year. They come back out (after a lot of whirring noises and the camera going wonky) in black and white with a box of Derriere Squares and broken smart phones. Woods realizes this means there are no video games so Big E. shouts that they shouldn’t be here. Cue the Vaudevillains to beat them down, ending a hilarious segment WAY too early.

Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows

Reigns and AJ are at ringside. No Siva Tao for the Usos which is really odd to see. Jimmy superkicks Anderson to start and Gallows is knocked to the floor as well, giving us a meeting on the floor but not a break. Anderson takes over on Jimmy back inside, setting up a legdrop and chinlock for two. Something resembling a Whisper in the Wind puts Gallows down on the floor and Jimmy dives off the steps to drop him again. Anderson decks Jimmy and we get a lot of shouting to take us to a break.

Back with Luke crotching himself on the top rope and Anderson getting backdropped to the floor. Jey gets the tag and dives onto both of them, followed by the running Umaga Attack for two. Anderson breaks up a superplex attempt but charges into a spinebuster for two. Karl tries to run the ropes but eats a superkick with Gallows making the save. Gallows eats another superkick, followed by back to back double superkicks. The Superfly Splash ends Gallows at 12:48.

Rating: C+. I would say to never have them fight again but at this point they’ll probably have it again on Smackdown or at the pay per view. I’m really not sure why we needed the Usos to win here but I’m sure it’s something to do with teaching Gallows and Anderson their place in the company. It’s not like they can go anywhere else and be stars.

Post match the brawl keeps going with the tag teams being sent out to the floor. AJ picks up the chair but Reigns punches it out of his hands. Gallows and Anderson interfere but Roman drops them, allowing AJ to beat on Reigns with the chair, including a Styles Clash onto the chair.

Big Cass vs. D-Von Dudley

Before the match, Cass implies that D-Von is Steve Urkel. Bubba loads up an early table but gets on the apron for some near heel miscommunication. The East River Crossing puts D-Von away at 58 seconds.

Cass does S-A-W-F-T post match and you can see Enzo’s value deteriorating every second.

John Cena return video.

Kalisto vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title and Kalisto slips on the way to the ring. Del Rio goes after the mask to start before sending Kalisto outside. Kalisto comes back and tries a hurricanrana off the apron, only to get caught and swung into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Kalisto taking a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker so Del Rio can show off the biceps. We see Sin Cara watching in the back as Rusev blasts him in the back with a stick.

Del Rio forces Kalisto to watch the beating on the screen before going HARD into the post off a missed charge. Alberto takes way too long for the top rope double stomp though and Kalisto comes back with a top rope hurricanrana. Cue Rusev kicking Cara down the aisle as Kalisto springboards into a seated senton. The hurricanrana driver gets two but the Rusev distraction lets Del Rio get in a Backstabber for the pin at 11:12.

Rating: D. Another champion loses because that’s how you build a title match. I’m so glad we got this mini League of Nations reunion after all that time they spent tearing them apart. If there’s a reason that Kalisto is being destroyed like this it’s not being made clear enough and this loss really didn’t need to happen. I’m sure this is going to mean the world to Del Rio too, because a pin over a champion isn’t something that’s going to be forgotten a week later, right D-Von and Paige?

Rusev kicks Kalisto in the back of the head and gives him a PAINFUL look Accolade post match.

Here are Shane and Stephanie to moderate the Women’s Title contract signing in the closing segment. They introduce Charlotte but Ric Flair comes out for the big hyped up introduction. Charlotte thanks her dad for the speech and wants to sign but Shane brings out Natalya. Getting her history wrong, Natalya says Charlotte beat her before without Ric in her corner (Ric and Bret were at ringside for that match).

Charlotte goes on a rant about how this is her city and how everyone loves her because her last name is Flair. Ric starts WOOing but Charlotte actually cuts her off. The champ goes to sign the contract but there’s a clause saying that Charlotte forfeits the title if Ric takes one step down the aisle.

Cue security to drag Ric away and if he doesn’t leave, the title is forfeited right now. Ric yells at Stephanie and calls her the worst businesswoman of all time. It’s time to fight Shane and the fans go nuts, only to have Stephanie slap Ric instead. Now security takes him out but Natalya has to save Stephanie from Charlotte. The champ is put in the Sharpshooter and taps out to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was a long, hard show to sit through. It really feels like they ran out of ideas before we got to Extreme Rules and this was what we were stuck with instead. There’s very little that has my interest for Sunday and this show made that interest go down even further. I don’t know what they need to change at this point but a go home show with the Colons in a new gimmick and Breezango vs. Golden Truth really isn’t a good sign.

Results

Cesaro vs. Sami Zayn went to a no contest when Kevin Owens and Miz interfered

Sami Zayn/Kevin Owens b. Cesaro/The Miz – Helluva Kick to Miz

Shining Stars b. Scott Jackson/Brian Kennedy – Shining Star to Kennedy

Dana Brooke b. Becky Lynch – Rollup

Breezango b. Golden Truth – Breeze pinned Goldust after R-Truth accidentally kicked him

Usos b. Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson – Superfly Splash to Gallows

Alberto Del Rio b. Kalisto – Backstabber

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: May 12, 2016
Location: Wells Fargo Arena, Des Moines, Iowa
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Byron Saxton, Jerry Lawler

It’s kind of hard to say what to expect around here as the show has been bouncing back and forth between focusing on the Intercontinental Title feud and then the World Title situation. The former tends to be the more interesting and it should be a fun show tonight with all four people being thrown together in a tag match. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Dean Ambrose to get things going. Lawler thinks Jericho should press charges against Dean for destroying the jacket. Well, uh, YEAH probably but that’s the kind of thing that doesn’t happen in wrestling. Dean thinks they’re even now because Jericho smashed Mitch over the back of his head to try and take away everything he has. This ring is all that he’s got and as long as his heart is beating, no one is going to take it away. Now the question is what can Dean take away from Jericho and the first thing that comes to his mind is Jericho’s ego.

After Dean gets done with him, Jericho isn’t even going to be sure if wrestling is for him anymore. The lights go out and Jericho’s music comes on, only to have Jericho appear behind Dean and lay him out. That’s not it though as he pulls out a straitjacket to tie Dean down. Ambrose wakes up as Jericho shouts that Dean needs to get crazy while beating him in the head. A Codebreaker stops Dean’s comeback and a second one FINALLY has referees out here to break it up. Jericho does his Gift of Jericho pose on the announcers’ table.

Rusev vs. Sin Cara

Kalisto is on commentary and says helping Cara on Monday was just being a team. Rusev drops him with an early clothesline and stomps away as Kalisto stumbles over his battle plan for the pay per view. A kick to the chest puts Cara down again and we hear about Steph Curry for no good reason.

In your random insult of the week, Rusev has dubbed Kalisto the smelly boy who hides behind a mask. Cara starts kicking at the leg and scores with some right hands, followed by a top rope flip attack. As this is going on, Lana throws water on Kalisto for a distraction so Rusev can kick him in the head. Back in and the superkick sets up the Accolade to make Cara tap at 3:09.

Rating: D. SO WHAT WAS THE POINT OF MONDAY??? If you’re just going to have Rusev squash Cara like he always should, why have him lose in the first place? As usual it comes off like WWE has no idea what they’re doing from one show to another and just does stuff for the sake of doing it instead of with any kind of logical reasoning or planning behind it.

We look at Dana Brooke debuting and helping beat down Becky Lynch on Monday.

Emma introduces Dana, who is ready to destroy Becky tonight. People forget that Emma used to be on top of the NXT women’s division but Dana has never forgotten and knows what Emma can do. This needed more patting on the head.

Becky Lynch vs. Dana Brooke

Lynch forearms her to start and pats Dana on the head, only to be pulled down by the hair. Dana stomps her on the mat and cranks on an arm and leg at the same time. Becky starts her comeback with a clothesline and a leg lariat but Dana sends her throat first into the ropes so Emma can poke her in the eye. Dana grabs a jackknife cover for the pin at 2:52. This was really awkward, which I’m sure has nothing to do with Dana debuting in September 2014 and being injured for months but still being called up to the main roster anyway.

Video on the end of Monday’s six man tag and the post match showdown between Reigns and Styles.

AJ gives Anderson and Gallows a pep talk for tonight but says he’s banned from ringside. They seem to be officially going with The Club.

Here’s New Day for their weekly chat. Big E. nearly swears about what happened on Monday, which Woods says was the Vaudevillians Kanye Westing them. By that he doesn’t mean marrying someone who has a big……I think you get the idea. Actually Woods means getting involved in something that was none of his business. They’re stuck in the 1830s and at Extreme Rules they’ll be knocked into the DeLorean and sent back to the future. Cue the Vaudevillians to sing about how they’ll win the titles a week from Sunday. Soon the sun will set on the New Day and the night belongs to the Vaudevillians.

Aiden English vs. Kofi Kingston

Kofi dropkicks him at the bell and stomps the heck out of him in the corner. English gets sent outside but catches a sliding Kofi and sends him face first into the post to take over. Big E. holds up the cereal to bring Kofi back to life (needs more Lion King), which actually seems to work as Kofi kicks English in the face and gets two off a high cross body. A top rope splash to the back gets two but everyone else gets ejected. Things settle down and Kofi grabs a sunset flip, only to have English drop down and put his hand on the ropes for the big upset at 3:52.

Rating: C. English is better in the ring than he’s given credit for but it’s pretty difficult to have a bad match against someone like Kofi Kingston. I still don’t buy the Vaudevillians as taking the titles away from New Day as Anderson/Gallows should have that spot locked up but at least the build has been set up very well.

Reigns is also banned from ringside but he’s ready to come out and deal with Styles if necessary.

Luke Gallows/Karl Anderson vs. Usos

Reigns and Styles are banned from ringside. Karl and Jey get things going with Jey in control before it’s off to Jimmy for a running forearm. It’s Gallows pulling Jimmy down by the hair and coming in for a slam. Anderson pounds away in the corner even more as Ranallo mentions Karl teaming with Giant Bernard, who Lawler says he hasn’t heard from in a long time.

Anderson finally misses an elbow and it’s off to Jey as things speed up. There’s a powerslam to Karl but Gallows kicks Jey in the face and we take a break. Back with Anderson dropping a knee for two before it’s back to Gallows for a chinlock. With that going nowhere, Gallows opts to just punch Jey in the corner. A superkick gets Jey out of trouble and the diving tag brings in Jimmy for the real house cleaning. Another superkick drops Anderson and sets up the Superfly Splash, only to have Gallows pull Jimmy to the floor. Gallows throws him over the announcers’ table and that’s a DQ at 11:39.

Rating: C-. The match was fine (albeit a bit slow paced) but the problem here is I’m sick of seeing them fight. This is the sixth time in three weeks that they’ve been in the same match. They’re not bad or anything but it’s the same problem WWE has so often: eventually people get sick of them and it’s time for something fresh. Have the Hype Bros comes up from NXT get squashed by Anderson and Gotch or put the Social Outcasts against the Usos or something but stop just doing the same thing and then expecting us to care when you put this on pay per view (which you know they will).

The beating continues post match as Anderson kicks Jey in the face and the twins are beaten down with a chair. You know, the match is over so there’s nothing keeping Reigns from coming out for the save.

R-Truth waters his selfie stick and gets his phone wet.

Here’s our first Life Lesson With Coach Backlund. Bob asks Darren what time his watch says. Darren pulls out his phone to check the time but Backlund thinks he’s making a phone call. His advice is to not call the operator and waste her time about the time. Young says no one wears watches anymore and he has everything on his desktop on his smart phone. Backlund: “I don’t care if your phone is Einstein!” He wants the mail in a mailbox, a calendar on a wall and the desktop on top of a desk. Darren is told to do 200 squats and that’s just fine with him. Again they weren’t even in the same room, which makes this even better.

On a related sidenote: since when did wearing a watch become something so horrible? Yeah you can check your phone, or you can flick your eyes over to your wrist and see what time it is. You might even be able to do that without then needing to check 14 things on your phone and getting distracted by something. Since when did that become some arcane way of thinking?

Goldango vs. Gorgeous Truth

Breeze and Fandango open things up but it’s off to Goldust and Truth less than thirty seconds in. Neither of them want to fight though so Truth tags Breeze back in, only to have Tyler knock Truth off the apron. Fandango turns on Goldust as well and Breeze pins Goldust (off a single clothesline, the only move Goldust took all match) for the pin at 1:39.

The beatdown is on and Goldust tries to cover Truth. That’s a nice gesture but if I’m Truth, I’d try to find a partner who can survive a clothesline.

Greetings From Puerto Rico. Their new name is the Shining Stars.

We look at Ric Flair being escorted out of the building in the way too complicated segment on Monday.

Charlotte calls that a travesty because Ric Flair deserves better treatment than that. Ric guarantees that Charlotte will retain the title at Extreme Rules but Charlotte looks unsure. To recap, the idea here is that Charlotte is in trouble without Flair and Ric is the one who is confident. In other words: Flair looks good and Charlotte looks almost inept. As usual, advantage Flair.

Cesaro/Sami Zayn vs. The Miz/Kevin Owens

This should be good. During Miz’s entrance, Owens jumps on commentary to say he’s allowing Miz one last chance to be a good partner before he takes the title at Extreme Rules. Miz and Cesaro get things going with the latter grabbing a headlock. A backbreaker gets two on Miz so Owens shouts about how he can do better. That’s fine with Miz who brings Owens in, followed by Sami tagging himself in as well.

Zayn hammers away in the corner and Lawler correctly says the referee should be admonishing Sami for the punches. Miz comes in and bails to the floor but Owens won’t let him leave. The good guys hit some dives to take the villains down and we take a break. Back with Sami slamming Miz and low bridging him out to the floor. Owens gets in a cheap shot though and it’s time for Sami to be in trouble. A hard kick to the back sets up a camel clutch from Miz.

Owens to Byron: “YOU BETTER PRAISE ME!” The Reality Check gets two for Miz but Sami comes back with one of those clotheslines to drop the champ. There’s the Blue Thunder Bomb (whose name confuses Lawler) to finally allow the tag off to Cesaro. Owens gets to eat some uppercuts and Cesaro runs to the floor for the uppercut against the barricade on Miz. The high cross body gets two on Owens but Sami’s Helluva Kick hits Cesaro by mistake. Owens adds the frog splash for the pin on Cesaro at 12:45.

Rating: C+. Standard Smackdown main event tag with a nice bonus of having Sami and Cesaro screw up to add some tension there. They’re actually pulling off the four way feud here as everyone wants to beat everyone else but it’s all about the title (mostly) instead of personal feelings. Good match here though and the kind of thing you would expect on Smackdown.

Sami takes the Pop Up Powerbomb but Miz gives Owens the Skull Crushing Finale to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This is what you come to know and expect from Smackdown with the watchable wrestling and meaningless storyline development as almost none of this will be brought up on Raw. You really have to take this show on a week to week basis as it really is just about whether or not the show happens to be good that particular week. Nothing much to see here though and that’s Smackdown in a nutshell.

Results

Rusev b. Sin Cara – Accolade

Dana Brooke b. Becky Lynch – Jackknife rollup

Aiden English b. Kofi Kingston – Rollup while grabbing the rope

Usos b. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows via DQ when Gallows threw Jimmy over the table

Gorgeous Truth b. Goldango – Breeze pinned Goldust after a clothesline from Fandango

Miz/Kevin Owens b. Cesaro/Sami Zayn – Frog splash to Cesaro

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

For alleged domestic violence.

Oh yeah he’s done.

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 9, 2016
Location: CenturyLink Center Omaha, Omaha, Nebraska
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Byron Saxton

Things are still on a bit of a roll in WWE as we’re getting closer and closer to Extreme Rules in thirteen days. Last week saw Roman Reigns and the Usos trade six man tag team wins against AJ Styles/Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows but it’s not clear how closely affiliated Styles is with his New Japan buddies. Let’s get to it.

We open with a long recap of the six man tag and post match issues with Styles refusing to hit Reigns with a chair and getting powerbombed through the announcers’ table. The rematch on Smackdown isn’t mentioned whatsoever, as is usually the case.

Tonight we’ll see the same six man, albeit with elimination rules.

Here’s Chris Jericho to kick things off with the Highlight Reel. Dean Ambrose was supposed to be his guest but he’s still in the hospital. Jericho has a replacement though as he unveils the remains of Mitch the plant. They’re not all that dissimilar because they’re both in pieces and could be entertaining at times.

Jericho finds it amusing that the fans were more concerned about Mitch than Dean after last week. Ambrose has no value on his own but Jericho is the Haley’s comet of WWE: a once in a lifetime talent so drink him in. This brings out Colin Cassady of all people to say that if this is the gift of Jericho, you better give him the receipt with it. Cass talks about the new era and says Jericho is standing in his way.

Jericho thinks Cass should go visit his buddy Enzo Annoying in the hospital but that’s not cool with Cass, who wants to fight right now. Jericho tries to call himself the best in the world but Cass covers the microphone, leaving Jericho looking stunned. The jacket comes off but Jericho leaves. Cass calls him SAWFT to draw Jericho back in, earning himself a great looking boot to the face. This was a well done exchange, even though I can’t imagine Cass pinning Jericho in a match.

Post break Jericho goes to Stephanie to say Shane is trying to ruin this new era (that’s probably the eighth time they’ve used that word in about 22 minutes) but Stephanie likes everyone getting a new chance. Therefore tonight, Jericho is facing Big Cass (complete with Stephanie doing the catchphrases because this is the wacky, fun loving Stephanie) in the main event. Oh and Jericho should never, EVER, try to drive a wedge between Stephanie and her brother Shane again. I’m so glad she pointed out which brother it was in that totally natural way of speaking of hers.

Baron Corbin vs. Dolph Ziggler

Before the match, Corbin says he’s the force in this new era. They start brawling early with Ziggler sending him outside and into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Ziggler caught in a chinlock before Corbin just lays in with heavy right hands. Corbin ducks his head though and eats a Fameasser for two. The Zig Zag is countered into a big old Deep Six for two but Corbin stops to pose too much. Ziggler tries the same rollup he beat Corbin with the first time out but Corbin kicks out and plants him with the End of Days for the pin at 8:28.

Rating: C-. The match was fine but more importantly it’s the match that should have happened at Payback. However, why have Corbin destroy Ziggler on pay per view when you can have more 50/50 booking, likely setting up a third match? My guess is because Corbin needed to be taught some kind of lesson or whatever their latest reason is, or perhaps because the writers have no idea how to book new talent aside from trading wins with an established name.

We look back at Stephanie making Charlotte vs. Natalya at Extreme Rules in a submission match with Ric Flair banned from ringside.

Charlotte and Ric Flair come in to see Shane, who they think should reverse Stephanie’s decision. Shane thinks otherwise and bans Ric from ringside tonight as well.

Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows/AJ Styles regret not going after Reigns last week. Tonight the Club is back together.

Fandango vs. R-Truth

This is a preview match for Gorgeous Truth vs. Goldango on Smackdown. Of course it’s a danceoff to start with Truth (complete with gold hair tips) doing a spinning bunny hop. Fandango dropkicks him down and dances, drawing Goldust up to the apron for some swiveling of his own. Breeze gets up as well but gets knocked right back down, setting up the Lie Detector for the pin at 2:11. You know, this is a stupid feud but I’ll give them points for actually sticking with the thing. It’s harmless enough so let them get a story told.

Miz, Cesaro and Kevin Owens are with the McMahons and Stephanie makes a triple threat match for the Intercontinental Title at Extreme Rules. Sami Zayn comes in to ask about making it a triple threat. He wants to be involved but Shane says he has to earn it, which he can by beating Miz tonight. Otherwise, Sami goes to the back of the line.

Paige vs. Charlotte

Non-title with Natalya on commentary. Paige quickly takes it to the floor and starts slugging away with forearms as Natalya talks about it being a beautiful day in Omaha. A big boot gets two for Charlotte, followed by some knees to the chest. Paige kicks her in the head for two more, followed by a good looking superplex for the same. Charlotte gets out of the PTO and grabs a rollup with her feet on the ropes, only to have Natalya break it up. Cue Ric Flair, allowing Charlotte to get in a backbreaker…..and here’s Shane to interrupt. Referees get Flair out of there and Paige grabs a rollup for the pin at 7:45.

Rating: C+. Yet again WWE manages to overbook things. This could have been the exact same match with Paige winning off a regular rollup and Ric not being involved. It even gives you a better story with Charlotte not being able to win on her own. I mean, it’s not like this is going to lead anywhere for Paige so why not go with the simpler story?

We look back at Cass and Jericho earlier.

Sami Zayn vs. The Miz

Non-title. Sami gets in some rollups for two early and headscissors Miz out to the floor. Miz bails to avoid the suicide dive and drives Sami’s back into the barricade instead. The moonsault off the barricade takes Miz down, only to have Maryse yell a lot as we take a break. Back with Sami being sent hard into the steps and barely beating the count back in. Miz kicks him in the face and gets in the short DDT for two.

The Figure Four is broken up and Sami gets a near fall of his own off the Michinoku Driver. Now the Figure Four goes on but Sami dives over and makes the rope. A sunset flip is blocked as Miz grabs the ropes, only to have the referee break it up. The exploder suplex into the corner sets up the Helluva Kick for the most obvious pin in a long time to send Sami to Extreme Rules at 12:58.

Rating: B-. I liked the match as usual but you could see the ending coming a mile away. After all, the only thing better than having one champion get pinned is to have TWO champions get pinned back to back in the span of half an hour. Sami winning is a good thing, though I can’t imagine he gets the title at the pay per view.

Becky Lynch doesn’t believe that the eye poke last week was an accident. Emma comes up to tell her that she really needs eyes in the back of her head. Cue the debuting Dana Brooke to lay Becky out and tell her that playtime is over.

We see Darren Young asking Bob Backlund to be his coach. As usual, Smackdown means nothing.

The Up Up Down Down crew shills Pizza Hut.

Zack Ryder is telling Shane that he knows he belongs when Kevin Owens comes in. Owens sums up the whole thing by asking Ryder why he exists. Shane’s decision is to make Owens vs. Ryder for the spot in the Intercontinental Title match tonight.

Roman Reigns and the Usos are ready to get rid of Gallows/Anderson before Reigns takes Styles out on his own.

Sin Cara vs. Rusev

Rusev suplexes him down a few times, followed by a bearhug and a fall away slam. Cara’s quick comeback goes a bit better than you would expect with Cara getting in a moonsault to send Rusev outside. A suicide dive looks to set up the Swanton but Rusev blasts him with a superkick. Lana starts yelling for no apparent reason, allowing Kalisto to kick Rusev in the head. Cara grabs a rollup for the pin upset at 3:45.

Rating: D. Does this show want to make my head hurt? Their big idea to make me want to see Rusev vs. Kalisto is to have Sin Cara beat him? I mean I know he just had a title match at Wrestlemania but this is still a stretch. This is the third straight match where the booking has somehow gotten worse and I have no idea who thinks this is the right idea.

Greetings From Puerto Rico. I have no idea if this is ever going anywhere but it might be nice to do something with it already.

Roman Reigns/Usos vs. AJ Styles/Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows

Elimination rules. Jey smacks Karl in the face to start and it’s already off to Reigns, meaning the booing begins early. That goes nowhere so Jey powerslams Anderson for no cover, only to have Anderson get in an uppercut from the floor, allowing Anderson to roll Jey up with tights for the pin at 2:38. Now we get Reigns vs. Styles with a big shot sending AJ right back into the corner. It’s already off to Gallows to run over Jimmy, who rolls the legal Anderson up for the pin at 4:35 total.

Back from a break with just Jimmy having been eliminated during the break. Reigns wastes no time and Superman Punches Gallows for the elimination at 9:35. It’s down to one on one so AJ hits the strike rush and knocks Reigns out to the floor. That means it’s time to load up the announcers’ table but Reigns throws AJ across instead. This brings out Anderson with a chair to blast Reigns for the DQ at 11:43.

Rating: C+. The match was fine, albeit with your usually questionable eliminations ala a Survivor Series match. I do like the ending better than Reigns taking a fall, though I dread the eventual title match with the Usos and Club running in for twenty minutes before Reigns wins anyway.

Post break everyone but Reigns and Styles fight to the back, leaving AJ to load up a Styles Clash on the chair. Reigns backdrops him to the apron though, leaving them in a staredown with the chair between them. Roman picks it up and throws it to AJ’s feet. Styles tries the Forearm but Reigns grabs the chair, leaving AJ to bail to the floor.

Zack Ryder vs. Kevin Owens

The winner is in the Intercontinental Title match at Extreme Rules. Owens grabs a headlock to start (Owens: “NO ONE BREAKS MY HEADLOCK!”) before running Ryder over and dropping the backsplash. They head outside with Owens trying the apron powerbomb but getting backdropped instead. Back in and Owens blasts him in the back of the head with a clothesline but misses the Cannonball. Ryder takes him outside for the Broski Boot up against the barricade, followed by the top rope Elbro for two back inside. The Rough Ryder doesn’t work and it’s the Pop Up Powerbomb to end Ryder at 4:05.

Rating: D+. Yes yes, WWE. You’ve made it very clear that Ryder winning anything is nothing more than a pipe dream. You don’t have to pound it into our heads all over again like we’re stupid enough to believe it could actually go somewhere. I really don’t know why this needed to happen but Ryder getting beaten up every single week is almost more cruel than anything else at this point.

Big Cass says he’ll win tonight.

Here’s New Day for a chat, complete with Kofi twirling some unicorn horns like nunchucks. They’re not sure how to pronounce Vaudevillains but realize they’re the opponents at Extreme Rules for the WWE World Tag Team Championships. We get some bowing down to the last piece of BootyO’s before Big E. says the Vaudevillains are from an era that weren’t kind to people like them. Woods looks nervous but Big E. says he’s talking about smartphone users. Those are the kinds of phones you can use to call your Mammy and Pappy to tell them NEW DAY ROCKS.

New Day vs. Dudley Boyz

Non-title and joined in progress after a break with Bubba hammering on Kofi’s face. Bubba even dances a bit before it’s off to Big E. for a shoulder and the Warrior Splash. Kofi comes back in and eats D-Von’s spinning elbow for two, only to have Big E. launch him onto D-Von in the corner for two. Everything breaks down for a bit until D-Von gets caught in the Unicorn Stampede. Cue the Vaudevillains to go after Woods though, leaving D-Von to hit one heck of a clothesline for the pin on Kofi at 5:10.

Rating: D+. A champ just got pinned with a clothesline. You couldn’t have them get counted out while they chase the Vaudevillains off instead? Anyway, the match was watchable enough and set up some stuff going forward but it felt like they were just filling in time until Gotch and English ran out there.

Kofi gets the Whirling Dervish post match.

Chris Jericho vs. Colin Cassady

During Jericho’s entrance, someone attacks him and steals the jacket. For reasons of general stupidity, the announcers are stunned when it’s Dean Ambrose. Dean rips up the jacket and Jericho is so scared that he can’t come to the ring and save the thing. He finally charges now that the jacket is destroyed but gets beaten down for his efforts. Jericho gets in a shot to the face and grabs the jacket but runs into Cass on the floor. Cass feeds him into Dirty Deeds and Dean continues to destroy the jacket.

We’re still not done though as Shane and Stephanie…..have nothing to say.

Jericho yells a lot to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This show just kept going and felt like it would never die. Above all else though: three champions took falls tonight. Three of them. It should be a big deal when one of them gets pinned but instead we’re seeing it happen three times in one night. This show was a very long sit with a bunch of really questionable to flat out bad booking holding it back. I’m not sure where they need to go to fix a lot of these issues, but better choices in who wins what would be a great place to start. This was a really weak show and a big step back for WWE in recent weeks, which you kind of had to know was coming.

Results

Baron Corbin b. Dolph Ziggler – End of Days

R-Truth b. Fandango – Lie Detector

Paige b. Charlotte – Rollup

Sami Zayn b. The Miz – Helluva Kick

Sin Cara b. Rusev – Rollup

Roman Reigns/Usos b. AJ Styles/Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows via DQ when Anderson hit Reigns with a chair

Kevin Owens b. Zack Ryder – Pop Up Powerbomb

Dudley Boyz b. New Day – Clothesline to Kingston

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the History of the Intercontinental Title at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B01D4D3EGQ

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

https://www.wwe.com/article/damien-sandow-king-barrett-other-superstars-released

And they’re bigger names this time.Santino Marella – Basically retired at this point and never appears.  Not exactly a big loss but he’s certainly a name.

Wade Barrett – He was leaving in a few weeks/months anyway so this really means nothing.  He’s still one of the most mishandled names I can think of in years.

Damien Sandow – This one is all on WWE.  Sandow was over and had worked hard for years but hey, let’s have him get really close, get a huge pop, and then have him lose to Big Show so he can FINALLY win a (third) battle royal in WWE.  It’s a case of a guy getting popular and WWE saying “eh we’re good” and then going with what they felt like doing.  This has never sat right with me and I hope Sandow goes somewhere else and has a nice run.

That makes five (Hornswoggle, Alex Riley, Zeb Colter).

http://www.wwe.com/article/hornswoggle-alex-riley-released

I know Cameron posted that big rant about how she’s constantly bullied over the mistakes she’s made and I really didn’t have a ton of sympathy for her.  She did two stupid looking things and her character is based on being a self obsessed idiot which isn’t even touching on how annoying she comes across as on Total Divas.

Did anyone even notice that El Torito wasn’t on TV anymore?

These are always interesting days.Hornswoggle – Not exactly an important deal.  He’s a background/comedy character at best and hasn’t been around in forever.

Zeb Colter – Same, though he should have been brought back as someone’s manager.  The guy can still talk and has so much knowledge and experience.

Alex Riley – Arguably the biggest name gone but he hasn’t meant anything in years either.  It’s a shame too as he had so much potential after that Miz feud.

There could be more names later today so stick around.

Smackdown
Date: May 5, 2016
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Mauro Ranallo, Jerry Lawler, Byron Saxton

We’ve hit the ground running on the way to Extreme Rules with a fairly action packed Raw earlier this week. The big story continues to be AJ Styles vs. Roman Reigns but now we also have the Usos and Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows much more closely involved. It should be interesting to see what they can throw in here before the pay per view in two and a half weeks. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with the Highlight Reel but first we get a recap of the Ambrose Asylum being canceled and the ensuing brawl. Ranallo: “Payback is a Mitch!” Jericho brags about injuring Dean Ambrose and keeping him off the show tonight. That’s about it for Dean though as here’s Jericho’s guest: Sami Zayn.

Before anything is said, we look at a clip of Cesaro vs. Owens on Monday with Sami and Miz getting involved and likely setting up a fourway for the title. Jericho says Sami isn’t a decent human being for holding up the Intercontinental Title but Sami thinks the scarf makes Jericho look stupid. Sami certainly wasn’t trying to steal the title but here are Miz and Maryse to interrupt.

This is Miz’s Intercontinental Title so Sami better not lay a finger on her again, which is exactly what Sami does again. Jericho says he would freak out if anyone touched his $15,000 jacket like that. Sami: “You paid $15,000 to look like a walking Christmas tree?” That’s enough for Jericho who walks out so Miz threatens Zayn for trying to go after the biggest fish in WWE. Sami touches the title again and says he wants to go for a swim. Zayn wants to go right now but Miz bails to the floor.

Sami Zayn vs. The Miz

Non-title with the bell ringing after a break. Feeling out process to start as they fight over wristlocks and armbars. Sami grinds him down with a headlock. Back up and Sami gets in one of those kind of awkward looking clotheslines of his to send Miz to the floor. A moonsault off the barricade drops Miz again but here’s Kevin Owens for a distraction.

We take a break and come back with Owens on commentary and Miz dropping a top rope axhandle for no cover. Owens: “You should be very proud of yourself Miz. You jumped up to the top rope, jumped off the top and hit him with your fists. You’re an athlete!” Sami low bridges him to the floor for the big flip dive and a staredown with Owens. Kevin runs in for the DQ at 8:39.

Rating: C. Not much to this one but it was there for the angle instead of the wrestling. They’ve got something here with this four way feud with the title on the line and the match at Extreme Rules should be a lot of fun. There really isn’t a bad option for the title at this point and that’s a very rare situation to have.

Post match Sami gets double teamed until Cesaro runs down for the save, ripping his suit off on the way down the ramp. Cesaro cleans house but accidentally takes out Sami in the process. This time it’s Cesaro holding up the title.

We look back at the end of Raw with the big brawl between Styles/Gallows/Anderson and Reigns/Usos, capped off by Reigns powerbombing AJ through the table.

Anderson and Gallows are a bit disappointed in AJ for not blasting Reigns with the chair on Monday. AJ wanted to keep it clean though because he wants to win the title his own way. Anderson and Gallows respect that but Roman doesn’t respect AJ. Styles likes their suggestions of going extreme and thinks it’s time for a chat with Roman.

Greetings From Puerto Rico.

We look at Enzo Amore’s injury on Sunday.

Vaudevillains vs. Social Outcasts

Dallas/Axel here. Bo starts fast with a powerslam on English for two. Axel comes in to go after Gotch but gets backdropped out to the floor for the save. The Whirling Dervish ends Dallas at 1:51.

Post match Colin Cassady comes out to go after the Vaudevillains and cleans house before Axel gets in to call Gotch and English SAWFT. That earns him a much deserved East River Crossing and Cass shouts a lot.

We look back at Shane and Stephanie gaining power on Sunday and their first night of sharing power on Raw.

Natalya/Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte/Emma

Natalya headlocks Charlotte to the mat to start and it’s off to Becky with Lawler yelling about the cheating going on. This show has been so much easier to sit through with him as a heel like he always should be. It’s already back to Natalya who charges into a boot in the corner and Emma comes in for some stomping. Emma slams her face first into the mat and it’s Charlotte putting on a chinlock.

Natalya finally sends Charlotte into the corner and makes the hot tag to Becky for some armdrags and dropkicks. The comeback is shortlived though as Becky is sent to the floor for a crash, allowing Charlotte to do her headscissor faceplants. Back from a break with Becky getting two off a rollup until a big boot puts her down again.

We get the eternally painful standing on the hair before Charlotte drops a knee. An enziguri puts Emma down though and the hot tag brings in Natalya for the house cleaning. The stepover dropkick sets up the discus lariat (which Ranallo seems to dub Nattie By Nature) on Charlotte but Natalya gets sent into the corner for the Emma Sandwich. Emma takes too long though and it’s the Sharpshooter to make Emma tap at 13:48.

Rating: B. I had a really good time with this one as the division really has evolved to make the whole thing feel important. Perhaps above all else, one of the major reasons has been the ring time. Look at this mach. When is the last time you saw a women’s match get almost fifteen minutes on a random Smackdown? That being said, it also helps that things have been entertaining with a well done tag formula to make everything work. It also helps that the wrestlers are all skilled enough to make the match that much better. Everything is working at this point and that hasn’t been the case for years.

AJ comes in to see Roman Reigns and the Usos. He wants to know if Reigns will be at ringside tonight and Reigns says he’ll be wherever he wants because he’s the champ. In that case, AJ will be at ringside too.

Darren Young has asked Bob Backlund to be his life coach. That’s fine with Backlund, if Young will put everything he has into this.

Zack Ryder vs. Rusev

This has become WWE’s version of Goldberg vs. Jerry Flynn. Ryder gets in a few dropkicks before Rusev slams him down. The Accolade wraps it up at 1:15.

Rusev and Lana do the Kalisto dance until Kalisto runs in for a corkscrew cross body before running away.

Fandango teaches Goldust to dance when R-Truth and Tyler Breeze come in. Goldust is having some issues but Truth says Fandango is the one off beat. A danceoff ensues but Fandango would rather have a tag match next week.

Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows

AJ and Reigns are at ringside. Jey and Karl get things going with the former getting in an uppercut and crucifix for two. A dropkick puts Anderson down again but Karl knocks Jey out to the floor. Karl goes after Reigns though and it’s a DQ at 2:20.

They brawl to a break and I think you know what’s coming.

Roman Reigns/Usos vs. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows/AJ Styles

Thankfully we don’t miss anything during a break. I’m so glad that’s becoming more of a trend. Styles and Reigns get things going with the champ getting in a quick shoulder and drawing quite a few boos. Reigns powers out of a sunset flip into a fireman’s carry, followed by a hard uppercut for two. Anderson comes in for some right hands as we get those phantom dueling chants. A big boot to the face drops Karl with Ranallo’s name drop of the mafia confusing Jerry. Jey comes in to face Gallows and a kick to Luke’s face allows the tag off to Jimmy as the twins start taking over.

Gallows kicks Jey in the face and we get that awkward staredown in front of the ring. They actually don’t take a break though as it’s AJ coming in and taking a quick enziguri. Reigns comes in off the cold tag and starts cleaning house with a running clothesline to Anderson. The corner clotheslines set up the Superman punch but it takes Gallows off the apron, followed by a suicide dive from Jimmy. The second Superman punch hits Karl in the jaw but AJ takes Reigns out before the spear. Anderson’s spinebuster gets two, only to have the spear put Karl away 7:30.

Rating: C+. Fine main event tag match here though I could have gone with some more time. It’s good to have Reigns get a win to reestablish himself and the World Champion getting the pin on Anderson isn’t going to hurt Karl in the slightest. I’m liking this feud so far and the rematch should be a lot of fun too.

AJ points at the title to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a much more efficient show with everything working like it should have. They’re not even hiding the fact that Smackdown is meaningless anymore as wrestlers make the matches and Shane/Stephanie never acknowledge that this show exists. All you can ask for is some good wrestling and storyline supplements which is exactly what we had tonight. Fun, easy show here with the women having a really nice match.

Results

Sami Zayn b. The Miz via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered

Vaudevillains b. Social Outcasts – Whirling Dervish to Dallas

Natalya/Becky Lynch b. Charlotte/Emma – Sharpshooter to Emma

Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade

Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows b. Usos via DQ when Roman Reigns interfered

Roman Reigns/Usos b. Karl Anderson/Luke Gallows/AJ Styles – Spear to Anderson

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