Smackdown
Date: August 2, 2013
Location: Toyota Center, Houston, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, Alex Riley

After the mess that was Raw on Monday hopefully things pick up tonight. Last week’s show was very interesting with the focus on everything but the main event matches. That’s the kind of show Smackdown needs to be: something completely different from Raw and not a rehash of everything we sit through for three hours. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Del Rio to announce his Summerslam opponent. Alberto says when he was champion before the fans didn’t support him so he has nothing to thank them for. Now he’s champion again and there’s nothing they can do about it. He does however want to thank Vickie Guerrero for allowing her to pick his Summerslam opponent.

Del Rio says Cena picked the troll Daniel Bryan to hide from Del Rio, so maybe Alberto should pick the beast Brock Lesnar. Well he’s taken already so maybe it should be Houston’s own Booker T. That won’t work either because everything that comes out of Houston is worthless. That’s the best insult he can come up with? Then Del Rio came up with the perfect opponent to grant a first ever world title shot: Ricardo Rodriguez.

This brings out Vickie who says Del Rio is trying to disrespect him. She speaks some Spanish and calls Ricardo a jiggly little manchild. Alberto says he wasn’t trying to disrespect her and he’ll pick Brooklyn Brawler instead. Vickie says Vince wouldn’t like that pick so Del Rio will face the winner of RVD vs. Orton vs. Christian tonight.

This is a good example of why GM’s are a waste of time. The whole segment took over ten minutes and could have easily been accomplished by saying “tonight there’s a triple threat match for the #1 contendership.” Instead we have to bring out Vickie and listen to Alberto when we could have used this time for anything else. It develops Del Rio as a cowardly heel a little bit, but the same thing could have been accomplished in a backstage segment with him recommending Ricardo or the Brawler as his opponents.

Kaitlyn vs. AJ for the title later.

We recap Cody stealing the briefcase last week and throwing it in the Gulf of Mexico.

Cody Rhodes vs. Jack Swagger

Colter doesn’t start talking until Cody is already on the apron. Rhodes doesn’t want to listen so he decks Swagger to get us going. Cody hits a quick uppercut and a knee to the side of the head for two. Swagger comes back with his powerslam/belly to belly and a clothesline for two. Cody fights up but the Disaster Kick is knocked out of the air and a Vader Bomb gets two. The gutwrench powerbomb is countered into a sunset flip for the pin for Cody at 1:57.

Post break Cody goes on a rant against Sandow for being so stuck up and bragging about himself. Cody compares throwing the briefcase into the Gulf to the Deep Water Horizon oil spill. “That was a joke.” Sandow comes in and beats him down for the bad line.

Sin Cara vs. Big E. Langston

Langston runs over Cara as the lights go orange. Cara mostly hits what was supposed to be a dropkick for two as Ziggler is watching from the back. Big E. takes him down with a headlock and drives an elbow in the chest. Langston goes old school with an abdominal stretch and even gets caught holding the ropes. Riley: “Only illegal if you get caught.” Cole: “He did get caught. That’s why the referee was counting.” Cara springboards into the Big Ending but slips down the back and fires off some kicks. A standing Lionsault is caught in the Big Ending for the pin at 2:52. It was longer than I was expecting but Langston dominated.

Wyatt Family promo focusing on their issues with Kane.

Layla and Kaitlyn are in the back with the Brit saying she’ll support Kaitlyn in her match tonight. Kaitlyn’s idea for AJ: “Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice you’re going to get speared.” Layla says she’s been around a long time and Kaitlyn is the real deal. They hug and Layla smiles a lot.

Del Rio yells at Vickie for going back on her word about letting him pick his opponent. She accuses him of being afraid when Brad Maddox comes in. Apparently Del Rio will be on Raw and under his jurisdiction. Isn’t he there every week?

Fandango vs. CM Punk

This is a result of Fandango interrupting Punk last week. Fandango dances around so Punk kicks him in the legs to take over. Punk fires off strikes but gets caught in a headlock from the dancer. A spinning kick to the ribs and a high elbow take Fandango down for two but he sends Punk into the corner to take over again. A GTS attempt is escaped and we take a break.

Back with Fandango coming around Summer to send Punk into the steps. Punk slides back in at the last second and Fandango starts in on the arm. He drives knees and elbows into Punk’s face before we hit the chinlock. So much for the arm stuff. Fandango cranks on the chinlock and wraps his leg around Punk for extra leverage.

Punk fights up but a hard elbow to the face gets two. Fandango misses a splash and Punk hits the running knee in the corner. Fandango rolls to the apron and gets in a kick to the head and a falcon’s arrow for two. The top rope legdrop is countered and a superplex sets up the Anaconda Vice to make Fandango tap at 9:40 shown of 12:00.

Rating: C+. Nice match here as Fandango got to show off here. This is the kind of match that can do midcarders a lot of good. Punk gets a competitive win and Fandango gets to look good as well, but he doesn’t lose anything because he has no business beating the star. Good booking here and it gives Punk something to do for a week.

We recap the opening of the show.

RVD says Christian and Orton aren’t pushovers but they’re not Rob Van Dam. Christian comes in and says he deserves one more match. Orton comes in and says he’s fine with winning the World Heavyweight Champion while still holding the briefcase. Van Dam says he’s here to win titles, not to stroll down memory lane.

Divas Title: Kaitlyn vs. AJ

AJ is defending and Kaitlyn, the hometown girl, has Layla with her. Kaitlyn takes her straight into the corner to start but AJ comes back with a quick sleeper. She wraps Kaitlyn up on the mat as Layla plays cheerleader. Kaitlyn gets up and rams the champion into the corner but AJ trips her up and dances around the ring. The blonde comes back with a gutbuster to send AJ to the floor but Layla gets in the way of the spear and smiles. AJ gets in a cheap shot and the Black Widow gets the submission at 3:02.

Rating: D. This falls under the category of turns that surprised no one and that no one cares about. It’s a good way to shift away from AJ vs. Kaitlyn though as that story has been played out for months now. Layla works better as a heel but hopefully she doesn’t ditch the shorts. Match was nothing.

The Raw ReBound recaps the Vince/Bryan situation and the double main event from Monday.

Randy Orton vs. Christian vs. Rob Van Dam

The winner gets Del Rio at Summerslam, but the booking makes little sense. Cole says Orton and Christian are here because they pinned the champion. Van Dam lost to the same guy clean in less than three minutes but he gets the same reward as guys who got clean pinfalls? The champion comes out and says he’ll be watching the three stooges beat the guacamole out of each other. One of them will be tapping out at Summerslam and does anyone really believe him?

Orton is sent to the floor and Van Dam kicks Christian down but Randy trips up Rolling Thunder. Van Dam sends Orton into the steps and puts him on the barricade followed by the spin kick to the back. Van Dam celebrates but gets caught by a spear from Christian as we take a break. Back with Christian getting two on Van Dam off a tornado DDT. Rob rolls to the floor and Orton pounds away on the Canadian. Randy hits a superplex for a delayed two and Rob is back with the kicks all around. A monkey flip (which isn’t unique Cole) sends Christian flying and the split legged moonsault gets two on Orton.

Van Dam charges into Orton’s knee but Christian counters Randy’s Elevated DDT. Rob is sent to the floor as well and Christian joins them. Rob slams Christian down and goes back in for a BIG flip dive to take everyone out as we take another break. Back with Orton and Christian slugging it out and Van Dam on the floor. Orton catches Christian’s middle rope dropkick and starts a pinfall reversal sequence. Christian takes over and knocks Van Dam off the apron but the spear misses. The middle rope back elbow puts Orton down but Rob kicks Orton down before the Killswitch.

Another kick puts Christian down and the Five Star connects for a delayed two, allowing Orton to make the save. Van Dam hangs on to avoid the powerslam but Orton pops up to catch Rolling Thunder in the powerslam in a cool move. Rob fights out of the Elevated DDT but Orton dropkicks him to block a springboard. The Elevated DDT lays Christian out but Orton has to hit the RKO on a charging Van Dam. The distraction allows Christian to backslide Orton for the pin and the title shot at 10:20 shown of 15:50.

Rating: B. Very good triple threat here with the crowd loving Van Dam, Orton being the likely winner and Christian being the man in the middle who steals the win at the end. They didn’t really get to near falls until the end which made the match flow much better. Good stuff here and nice to see Christian getting a shot at a major show. And he got it with a backslide!

Post match Orton teases turning on Christian but shakes his hand instead. Rob shakes his hand too. Christian is about to say something but Del Rio jumps him from behind to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was a pretty solid episode as we’re finally getting somewhere with the Del Rio losses. The main event was good and the Punk match was fine, giving us two good matches in two hours. Only the Divas match was bad but at only three minutes long there isn’t much to complain about. It’s a good show as Summerslam finally has more than two matches with about two weeks left before the show.

Results

Cody Rhodes b. Jack Swagger – Sunset Flip

Big E. Langston b. Sin Cara – Big Ending

CM Punk b. Fandango – Anaconda Vice

AJ b. Kaitlyn – Black Widow

Christian b. Randy Orton and Rob Van Dam – Backslide to Orton

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 1, 2011
Location: Conseco Fieldhouse, Indianapolis, Indianapolis
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Tonight we continue the road to Summerslam with the first public statement from the champ (I think) CM Punk. HHH is still in charge and in theory JR will he here as well. We’ll probably start the building to the PPV as there are only two Raws left before the show, which has really snuck up on us. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of what got us to have two champions. I still don’t see why Vince didn’t strip Punk of the title as MITB went off the air or book him in a “champion can lose the title by countout” match with anyone he could find.

Here’s Punk, still with the new song, to open the show. He holds up the belt to a solid reaction and declares that THE CHAMP IS HERE. He has a story to tell us. Punk says he knew for about a year that his contract was going to be up. He loves working in WWE but not the bosses. He spoke his mind and we managed to get some change out of it. Vince has been relieved of his duties and that’s change.

Punk takes some credit but the fans are to be thanked also. Punk is here to make this fun again but he couldn’t do that from his couch in Chicago. He made the call to come back and the timing couldn’t be better. Cena may have a belt but what Punk has is a championship title. This title means that he’s the best wrestler in the world.

Cue HHH who says he brought back Punk because it was good for business. That’s why he brought back JR and Morrison (again, when was he actually gone other than to injury?): business. Personally though, HHH thinks Punk is smug, overrated and believes his own hype too much. Punk says it’s like looking in a mirror.

The champion talks about how Vince has let guys go that are main event level talent: guys like Batista, Foley, Jericho and Lesnar. HHH says if you want to tell the truth, why not do it about why you re-signed? Punk isn’t sure about this but HHH says it’s because he wanted to hear his own voice. Punk has called the microphone a pipe bomb, but what happens if no one is around to hear a pipe bomb? He needs the WWE Universe for the platform.

Punk calls that a 50/50 shot, but the truth is that he’s the WWE Champion. HHH says that’s true but so is Cena. HHH says he’ll fix that tonight and his music plays him out. Punk says cut the music, even though he loves Motorhead. He says he’s just getting warmed up. Punk isn’t going to shut up just because he signed a contract. If Hunter Hearst Helmsley (Punk’s words) wants to talk about egos, let’s talk about HHH’s.

We get references to HHH using his power backstage that he got from sleeping with the boss’ daughter and how he held everyone down. That’s true to a degree but that’s a big debate for later. HHH says because he’s the boss, he can’t break certain rules, even though he wants to take Punk’s head off. “Can you do that, or do you need to go ask your wife first?” Punk leaves HHH who is kind of smiling.

Rey has a tag match later and Morrison dives over him. They get Miz/Truth later.

Oh great there’s a Divas battle royal next.

Divas Battle Royal

Picture every Diva who isn’t champion and they’re in this. Kelly is on commentary here. They’re going out incredibly fast. We’re down to Alicia, Beth, Natalya, Eve and the Bellas. Scratch Nattie from that. This match actually takes a break. Really? Back with more boring Divas action. Alicia is out. There’s nothing to talk about here because they’re just trying to put each other out. Even looks good in pink though. Eve is out and landed pretty badly. Beth puts both Bellas out (one on each shoulder) to win at 7:18.

Rating: D. So? It’s the same stuff as always and it never was very interesting at all. There’s nothing else to say here as most of the match was either rapid eliminations or the commercial. It was what it was and that’s about all there is to say about it. At least Beth can destroy her now.

Post match Kelly goes in to hug her like an idiot and Beth turns heel and kills her, thank goodness.

Truth comes up to Miz and says they’re a lot alike. Miz disagrees so Truth says that having two WWE champions is bad. It’s horrible. It’s…..”A conspiracy?” Miz doesn’t like this and tells Truth to leave. Truth wants to know why HHH had them in a tournament if he was just going to bring back Punk. I guess we’re ignoring Vince making that tournament now.

Cena says his focus tonight is HHH because there are two WWE Champions. The decision is tonight so Cena will be there for it.

The Miz/R-Truth vs. John Morrison/Rey Mysterio

Miz vs. Morrison starts us off. John keeps going after Truth which lets Miz get a shot in. Suplex gets two. Nice leg sweep puts Miz down and it’s off to Rey. Seated Senton off the top gets two. Miz is sent to the floor as is truth. Rey hits a seated senton off the apron to take Truth down and John dives over the top with a corkscrew dive to mostly hit Miz and we take a break.

Back with Truth holding Rey in a camel clutch. During the break the evildoers actually didn’t cheat to take over. Nice to see for a change. Truth continues his old school offense with an abdominal stretch. Rey fires off but it’s off to Miz who gets a seated boot for two and we hit the chinlock. Enziguri puts Miz down but he keeps the tag from being made. Back to the chinlock, this time by Truth.

Big spinning forearm gets two on Mysterio. Rey dives again for the ropes but Miz makes the save again. Nice little story there for the match. Miz hits his corner clothesline but goes up and dives into a dropkick. There’s the hot tag to Morrison who gets a solid pop. See what happens when you build something up?

He cleans house and hits the C4 to Truth for two. He loads up Starship Pain but Miz pulls Truth out of the way. Back inside an axe kick misses and a Pele kick sends Truth into the 619 position. Miz makes the save and sends him into the crowd. Moonlight Drive hits Miz but Morrison walks into that jumping downward spiral for the pin at 11:03.

Rating: B. See, THIS I can get into. They built up the hot tag all match and the payoff for it was a solid reaction from the crowd. Things can be so simple and yet can still work very well. I liked it rather well here and Morrison’s mistakes were played up well by Miz and Truth, who caught him in his mistakes. Nice to see and it’s called psychology. Makes me all tingly.

Post match Truth hits Morrison with a bottle of water and Morrison takes the Finale.

HHH says nothing of note.

Summerslam Recall is Warrior taking the title from Honky in probably the best Summerslam moment for the vast majority of the series.

Here are Dolph and Vickie. I’m still not sure on the song. Vickie says her catchphrase a lot and wants to know why Dolph hasn’t been getting enough attention. Dolph says he’s more of a man than anyone in the arena and anyone in the back. Cue…..Alex Riley? I think I can work with this. Riley wants to know when Ziggler is going to accomplish something without Vickie. Dolph has Vickie step aside….and leaves.

Santino Marella/Zack Ryder vs. David Otunga/Michael McGillicutty

This is non-title and the Nexus name has been dropped it seems. King mentioned Ryder’s show before the breaHe gets the hot tag to a ROAR but gets beaten down after a brief flurry. Santino is sent to the floor and Ryder misses the Rough Ryder. He gets caught in something like a Demolition Decapitator at 2:22. This was fine.

We get some of the earlier exchange between the Game and Punk.

Punk says he’s the champ.

Alberto Del Rio vs. Evan Bourne

Bourne runs into a boot to start and the beating begins. Del Rio’s arm work is great as the psychology of the match is perfect for him. His finisher is an arm hold so why would he work on anything but the arm? That’s basic psychology for you: why would you do something to say Bourne’s back if you’re going to work on the arm to end it? Bourne makes a brief comeback and the armbreaker ends this at 2:30.

Post match he puts the hold on again and Kofi comes out for the save.

Here’s HHH for the big announcement on who should be champion. He’s about to say it but John Lauranitis (you try to spell it) comes out and says executive VP and in charge of signing talent. HHH doesn’t look happy here. Johnny Ace (see why he got that name?) says Vince would want Cena stripped of the title. That brings out Cena who says that Ace never thinks and is the yes man that Punk was talking about.

Cena says that he’s not going to strip the title because it would devalue the title. He talks about how he wants to hit Ace again because that was his favorite part about Money in the Bank. HHH: “I don’t have any problem with that.” Ace leaves and HHH says he’s not stripping the title. Punk only came back to WWE when Cena was pinning Rey and said to hit his music. HHH again says he won’t strip the title and that brings out the other champion.

Punk doesn’t like the idea that HHH is going to strip him of the title which he has a legit claim to also. HHH says that’s not what he was going to do and tells them to quit whining. Also to Cena, it’s not Hunter. He’s Cena’s boss. At Summerslam it’s the rematch for one undisputed champion. Kind of lackluster the way he said it but it’s the only way they can do it.

HHH leaves and they stare each other down. Punk holds up his title and his music plays us out. Scratch that as Cena holds his up and that music plays us off. Punk goes onto the ropes and now HIS song plays. This is kind of awesome. Now Cena does the same but Punk’s is the last one heard after it changes like 8 times total.

Overall Rating: B. This was a hit and miss show. The HHH and Punk stuff was good and the tag match was good, but the rest of the show was building to other shows later in the future, which is ok but a little boring for a TV show. Summerslam is looking better now though as you can see a lot of the matches coming into focus. Good sign and a good building show here, but not great due to the wrestling being subpar.

Results

Beth Phoenix won a Divas Battle Royal

The Miz/R-Truth b. John Morrison/Rey Mysterio – What’s Up to Morrison

Michael McGillicutty/David Otunga b. Zack Ryder/Santino Marella – Middle rope elbow/backbreaker combination to Ryder

Alberto Del Rio b. Evan Bourne – Cross Armbreaker

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NXT
Date: July 31, 2013
Location: Full Sail University, Winter Park, Florida
Commentators: Tony Dawson, William Regal

This is an odd show for NXT as there isn’t anything planned coming into this episode. Last week saw Paige become the first Women’s Champion in a good match and Sheamus defeating Luke Harper in a stand alone match. That doesn’t leave much to build on this week but I’m sure NXT will pull something off. Let’s get to it.

Welcome Home.

We open with Enzo Amore and Colin Cassidy running their mouths. Colin brags about being undefeated as a team and not being soft (“S-a-w-f-t!”). Enzo says he sees NXT as a dance floor and they’re going to dance all over it. Cue Tons of Funk to chase them off in an obvious cameo. Cassidy and Amore talk trash from the floor but here’s Mason Ryan to chase them into the ring. Tons of Funk beat up the annoying ones and we have a referee but no bell. Ryan comes in and plants Amore with a cobra clutch slam before dancing with the fat guys to the only pop of his career.

Dusty is in the back with Emma and Paige when Summer Rae comes in to complain. She wants the title right now but Paige offers to break Summer’s teeth. Emma says she beat Summer fair and that Summer’s dancing sucks. Dusty calls the idea ridiculous but he likes it so the idea is on.

Charlotte vs. Sasha Banks

Sasha hooks a headlock to start but Charlotte rolls away. A dropkick puts Charlotte down for two and it’s off to an armbar. Charlotte fights up and backflips out of the corner before wrapping up Sasha’s legs for a sweet rollup, getting two. A chop (of course) staggers Banks but she easily takes Charlotte down and puts on a camel clutch. Back up and a running knee in the corner has Charlotte in trouble but she comes back with a clothesline. That front flip into a facejam/cutter (like Cena’s Throwback) is good for the pin at 3:19.

Rating: C-. Charlotte isn’t polished yet but it’s clear she’s got a good foundation to start with. I liked this better than her last match as she looked a lot more confident out there this week. It was a good idea to have Sasha control most of the match and just let Charlotte do her gymnastics stuff. Charlotte has a good future it would seem.

Tyler Breeze looks at himself a lot and talks about being breathtaking, magnificent and gorgeous. Someone with long hair is behind him making faces, getting a good reaction from the crowd.

Wyatt Family promo, set to Mary Had a Little Lamb.

Mickey Keegan/Aiden English vs. Wyatt Family

The Family has their full Raw intro now. The fans are going NUTS for the Wyatts which is strange to hear. Luke and Erick clean house and the discus lariat sets up the splash from Rowan for the pin on English at 26 seconds.

Post match bray talks about how there are men that try and fail but then there are men who change the landscape of this world. He’s the second kind of man and now he wants to know what the people around here are like. Today is the day that Bray Wyatt has decided to change the world.

Today is the day when pigs fly because Wyatt has told Mr. Fear that he is a liar. Go and tell all the world leaders because Bray Wyatt is coming to bring down the machine. Today the Wyatts say goodbye to NXT for now, but if you need to find Bray Wyatt, follow the buzzards. He throws in a little Time Is On My Side and drops the mic to chants of THANK YOU BRAY. This was WAY more intense than anything Wyatt has done and it worked very well.

Adrian Neville comes in to say he’s got Corey Graves’ back tonight in case the Wyatt Family interferes. Graves says if the Wyatt Family thinks they’ve seen a war, maybe the new champions should show them what war is.

Corey Graves vs. Scott Dawson

Graves misses a charge into the corner to start but the fans are entirely behind him. Dawson hits an elbow to the jaw for two and he does it again for the same result. Graves comes back with a kick to the jaw and a chop block to set up Lucky 13 for the tap at 2:00. This was nothing.

Post match Corey celebrates with Neville but here’s the Shield to interrupt. Rollins says Graves remembers the Shield for laying him out last time they were here. Graves and Neville are almost like Reigns and Rollins….but not quite. Ambrose says Neville is carrying around a belt because he slid into Kassius’ Ohno’s spot.

That makes him a thief, and that is an injustice. He offers Adrian a shot at greatness in a match but Neville wants the US Title on the line and to do it RIGHT NOW. Dean says Adrian isn’t talking to some NXT chump but rather the US Champion. The title match is on for next week, and Neville says justice is served next week.

Leo Kruger/Antonio Cesaro vs. Bo Dallas/Sami Zayn

Kruger vs. Dallas for the title next week. Something I’ve touched on tonight has been the crowd who will cheer everyone from the bayou religious cult to the paramilitary group to the white supremacist. Bo Dallas comes out and is BOOED OUT OF THE BUILDING. A loud No More Bo chant breaks out as Zayn and Kruger get things going. There’s an Ole chant and Zayn sends Leo across the ring out of a wristlock. Zayn jumps over Kruger in the corner and three straight armdrags set up an armbar on Leo.

Bo tags himself in and you can feel the crowd die. Off to Cesaro as the fans chant WE THE PEOPLE. Dallas snaps off some armdrags of his own but he takes too much time to tag, allowing Cesaro to kick him in the ribs to take over. A big boot puts Zayn on the floor but Dallas dropkicks Antonio down. Zayn gets the tag and Cesaro runs to the corner to tag Kruger who runs Sami over with a right hand.

We take a break and come back with Kruger getting two off a snap suplex to Zayn. Cesaro comes in with a European uppercut for two before putting on the standing chinlock. Back to Kruger who gets two off a headbutt and a double stomp. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Sami fights up and gets two off a sunset flip. Cesaro comes back in before the hot tag can be made and gets two of his own off a powerbomb.

Off to a regular chinlock from Antonio but Sami fights up and kicks him in the face to escape. Bo gets the tag and is booed out of the arena again which I don’t remember hearing on a hot tag before. Everything breaks down and it’s Kruger vs. Dallas in the ring. Bo hits a quick powerslam to send Kruger to the floor but back inside the Slice (running clothesline) is enough to put Dallas down for the pin (and an ERUPTION) at 10:40 shown of 13:10.

Rating: C+. The match was a basic tag team formula to set up the title match next week. The interesting thing again though was the reaction to Dallas. I haven’t seen consistent hatred for a guy like this since probably X-Pac. No matter what the guy does he gets booed out of the building but is still pushed as a face. There aren’t any shades of gray with his character. He’s a face through and through and for the life of me I don’t know why.

Overall Rating: B. Another good show this week for all the same reasons: a lot of stories were covered and those matches were the most important thing on the show at the time. It’s a good sign that this show can come up with a good hour of TV while having nothing set up in advance. Can you imagine Raw trying to be spontaneous like this? Good show this week like almost always, with NXT being the highlight of my wrestling week.

Results

Charlotte b. Sasha Banks – Front flip facejam

Wyatt Family b. Mickey Keegan/Aiden English – Splash to English

Corey Graves b. Scott Dawson – Lucky 13

Leo Kruger/Antonio Cesaro b. Sami Zayn/Bo Dallas – Slice to Dallas

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews for just $5 from Amazon at:

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There’s a lot of data here.First up is the always important PPV data:

WrestleMania 29 – 1,039,000 buys

Extreme Rules – 231,000 buys

Payback – 186,000 buys

These numbers are all slightly down a bit from last year, but Wrestlemania was more expensive this year and there were more HD buys which make up the difference.  Overall the quarter is down from last year, but there was a fourth PPV in the second quarter last year as well which explains the loss.

Television revenue, another huge money market for the company, was up $5.6 million (17%) from last year due to the extra hour of Raw and Main Event.

Live event/merchandise revenue were up as well.

Digital media (WWE.com) was up 27%.

Even WWE Studios made a profit.

All in all, this is an excellent report for WWE as the company continues to rake in money hand over fist.

It’s that time again as I’ve put together a new book with reviews of every episode of Monday Night Raw from 2001 for just $5. The book covers everything from the road to Wrestlemania XVII through the Invasion through the Undisputed Title to close out the year. It runs over 270 pages and contains 52 episodes of Raw.
 

The book is available worldwide and can be picked up in America here

In the UK here

And in Canada here.

If you live somewhere else and want to pick it up, just search “KB’s Complete 2001 Monday Night Raw Reviews” on your Amazon site and it should be there.

It’s an e-book format, but if you don’t have a Kindle or any other kind of e-reader, there are free Apps which can let you read it on your computer, phone or whatever else you prefer. You can find those free apps here:

Apps

Anyway, I hope you like it and enjoy.

KB

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 29, 2013
Location: Laredo Energy Arena, Laredo, Texas
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole

This is a rare taped episode of the show as the main guys are off in Australia at the moment for an international tour. We’re only a few weeks away from Summerslam and the main event matches are set, so most of the next few weeks will be about firming things up for the big show. We also have Cena vs. Ryback in a tables match and Bryan vs. Kane in a double main event. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Bryan running the gauntlet last week and Cena saving him from Ryback to close the show.

Here are Vince and Maddox to open the show. Brad apologizes for allowing Cena to pick his Summerslam opponent. Vince talks about Brad calling Bryan a psychologically disturbed troll who doesn’t have the aura of being a WWE Champion. Before Maddox can say how he REALLY feels about Bryan, here’s Goat face himself. Daniel says the words might have come out of Maddox’s mouth but they were dictated by Vince. McMahon says Bryan interrupted him and that’s disrespectful.

Bryan says that he’s worked hard for Vince over the years and hasn’t gotten a bit of respect in return. The fans keep chanting and Vince can’t get them to shut up. McMahon asks if Bryan respects Cena and Bryan says he does, but Vince thinks Cena is lying. Vince calls Cena a master manipulator and says Bryan is falling for the whole thing. Bryan is lacking the ruthless aggression to launch him to the top, but Cena doesn’t have it anymore either.

Vince says Cena walks around like he owns the place and Vince can’t stand it. He doesn’t want Cena to win at Summerslam either, but rather that both spontaneously combust, making Vince the winner at Summerslam. Bryan says it doesn’t matter what Vince thinks but rather what the people think. The people want a new champion named Daniel Bryan and a HUGE YES chant strikes up as Bryan leaves.

Mark Henry/Usos vs. Shield

Ambrose starts with Henry but Dean is easily thrown around. Rolins gets the same treatment so here’s Reigns to try his luck. Mark offers a test of strength but kicks Roman in the ribs to take over instead. Henry takes him into the corner and it’s off to Jey for some speed. Reigns easily takes him down and it’s time to start the Shield attack in the corner. Jey escapes and makes the hot tag to Jimmy who cleans a few rooms of the house before tagging in Henry.

A running elbow misses Ambrose and Dean goes crazy on the big man. Henry easily blocks a double suplex and sends Shield to the floor for a double suicide dive by the brothers. Back from a break with Roman holding Jey in an armbar. Ambrose comes in to work on Jey as well but a jawbreaker gets Jey out of trouble. Dean misses a charge into the post but Rollins breaks up the hot tag.

As usual the hot tag comes a few seconds later with Henry cleaning house. Ambrose gets tossed around but Reigns spears Mark down to stop him cold. Jimmy tags himself in and gets two off a high cross body to Dean. A Samoan drop looks to set up the Superfly Splash but Ambrose gets the knees up. Bulldog driver to Jimmy is good for the pin at 12:22.

Rating: C-. This was pretty pedestrian stuff but it picked up a bit at the end. I’m guessing the Usos were a transition from one feud to another for Shield which is fine. If nothing else we got a good match out of them at MITB. Anyway nothing to see here but they kept Henry strong which is the right idea.

Henry clears the ring post match.

We get a clip of Ryback bullying a backstage guy at catering. He keeps talking trash and throws the guy through a table. THIS is how you get him over as a heel.

Video on the Wyatts.

Kane wants the Wyatts but Maddox says they’re not here yet. If Kane wants to send a message to them, go beat Daniel Bryan.

Rob Van Dam vs. Fandango

Feeling out process to start until Van Dam kicks Fandango out to the floor. A moonsault from the apron takes the dancer our and the fans LOVE them some Van Dam. Fandango snaps the neck across the top rope to take over and it’s off to the chinlock. A kick to Van Dam’s head gets two but Rob comes back with more kicks of his own and Rolling Thunder gets two. Van Dam hits the springboard kick to the face and loads up the Five Star but Fandango bails for the countout at 4:09.

Rating: D. We really need to protect Fandango from a former world champion? The match was nothing but Van Dam’s return continues to get a strong reaction for not much substance. I don’t get the point in protecting the dancer though given that there’s nothing to him at the moment anyway.

AJ freaks out about fighting Kaitlyn again because Langston doesn’t help her. She accuses Big E. of liking him and Langston feels uncomfortable but AJ laughs and skips off.

Kaitlyn vs. AJ Lee

Non-title. AJ takes over to start and has that insane look on her face the entire time. Katilyn throws her off and loads up the spear but a running knee to the head puts her back down. An armbar doesn’t get AJ anywhere as Kaitlyn comes back with a backbreaker. AJ comes back with another armbar as we hear about Tweets from Vickie. Kaitlyn fights up and hits the spear out of nowhere for the pin at 4:51.

Rating: D. You remember those matches between these two that had a ton of heat and were awesome? This is the total opposite at it was just there to fill in a few minutes and set up yet another rematch. They took out all the good parts of this feud and turned it into the same exact thing that plagued the division for years.

Post match AJ freaks out and here’s Ziggler to stir the pot. He suggests AJ sleep with Langston later because Ziggler wants Big E. RIGHT NOW.

Big E. Langston vs. Dolph Ziggler

I would have thought this was a Summerslam match. Langston runs Ziggler over to start and talks a lot of trash. He throws Dolph around even more and throws on a bearhug to work on the ribs a bit as a good power man would. We hit the chinlock with a knee in Ziggler’s back as the fans aren’t all that interested so far. Langston talks even more trash about how it’s his time (isn’t that infringing on Cena’s gimmick?) before missing a charge into the post. Ziggler dropkicks him to the floor but AJ runs in for the DQ at 5:29.

Rating: D+. ANOTHER dull match tonight with the ending being as obvious as you could ask it to be. I’m guessing the guys are tired from the accelerated schedule but this show has almost no energy tonight at all. This match screamed Summerslam rematch to me which is probably the right idea.

Langston takes a Zig Zag post match.

Bryan comes in to see Cena and asks if what Vince said is true. Cena says Vince is trying to sell tickets and wants to know if Bryan is calling him a liar. Bryan says nothing and Cena leaves.

Christian vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title again. Del Rio takes Christian to the mat with a headlock before they both what looked to be a jumping clothesline from Christian. Del Rio stomps him down in the corner and hits a snap suplex for two. Christian sends him into the middle rope and hits the uppercut, only to charge into a superkick to the ribs. Del Rio charges into the corner but gets backdropped to the floor. Christian charges at Del Rio but hits the steps, allowing Del Rio to hit a running dropkick to send the arm into the steps.

Back with Del Rio stomping on the arm and jumping from the second rope for another shot. Christian is put in the Tree of Woe but manages to fight out of the reverse superplex. A middle rope missile dropkick puts the champion down but Christian misses a charge and sends the bad arm into the post again. Del Rio pounds away for another two count and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets the same. Alberto misses a middle rope backsplash but runs away from a spear. Back in and the low superkick gets two but the armbreaker is countered into a rollup for the pin for Christian at 13:46.

Rating: C+. The match wasn’t bad but it’s in the middle of a very boring show. Here’s the flaw with Del Rio: a win here doesn’t mean much for Christian as Del Rio already lost ten days ago to Orton, so it’s not like him losing is a huge surprise. Christian getting the title shot would be fine, but it’s not like he’s got a chance at the title or anything.

We recap Bryan’s gauntlet match last week.

Cody Rhodes vs. Wade Barrett

Before the match we get a recap of Cody stealing Sandow’s briefcase and throwing it in the Gulf of Mexico. Cody attacks to start but gets sent to the floor. Barrett rams him into the barricade and gets two off a backbreaker. Wade sends Cody chest first into the corner and hits a slingshot backbreaker for two more. We hit the chinlock for a bit before Cody starts his comeback. He mostly misses the moonsault press but hits a running knee to the jaw for two. The Disaster Kick misses but Barrett’s pumphandle is countered into Cross Rhodes for the pin at 4:26.

Rating: D+. Notice something here: Cody is winning matches and his push is starting to work. Seriously, the solution to getting someone over is to have them win matches. I know that’s completely against WWE’s booking philosophy lately, but it’s true: if you have someone win matches, they’re more likely to get over.

Post match here’s Sandow to talk about how he was the intellect of the Rhodes Scholars. “I saves the unwashed masses and you grew a mustache.” Sandow says he’s from a family of scholars and Cody is from a family of clowns and he doesn’t associate with carny folk.

Kane vs. Daniel Bryan

Kane kicks him down to start but gets caught in a half crab to stop the momentum. The big man easily kicks him off and kicks a charging Bryan’s head off. A suplex gets two for Kane and it’s off to a neck crank. The low dropkick gets two more as the fans try to wake up a bit. Back to the crank but Bryan fights up with strikes. The running clothesline can’t drop Kane but Bryan escapes the chokeslam. He sends Kane to the floor for the knee off the apron as we take a break.

Back with Bryan escaping a chinlock and firing off some kicks in the corner. A dropkick gets two and Bryan fires off the running dropkicks in the corner. Kane comes back with the side slam for two and there’s the top rope clothesline. Bryan escapes the chokeslam and fires off more kicks, only to have Kane grab another chokeslam. Bryan rolls him up into a small package for the pin, like he did to Cesaro last week, at 12:46.

Rating: C. Not bad again here but not much to see. I’m kind of glad this happened on Raw instead of at a big PPV which is what everyone was thinking would happen. That would have been a little too by the book for me which would have hurt the match. Either way, at least Bryan gets another win.

Post match Kane chokeslams Bryan anyway but here come the Wyatts. Kane is surrounded by the monsters but he hits the floor to go right after Bray. The numbers catch up to him though as Wyatt looks on. Harper’s discus lariat puts Kane down and here’s Wyatt in the ring. Sister Abigail lays Kane out and Bray grabs the mic. He’s heard that Kane calls himself the devil’s favorite demon. Kane isn’t a demon though and he needs to watch who he says those things in front of. Follow the buzzards.

Natalya vs. Brie Bella

Natalya hits a quick snap suplex for two but Brie grabs her in a chinlock. That goes nowhere and a slam puts Brie down. Brie charges into a boot in the corner and a discus lariat puts Brie down for two. Natalya loads up a Boston crab but here’s Nikki with a duck call. The distraction lets Brie get the pin at 4:18.

Rating: D-. Next. That is all.

Curtis Axel vs. R-Truth

Non-title again. Before the match Heyman talks about how aweoms Axel is like only he can. Axel pounds way but Truth hits the release front suplex. The ax kick misses and Axel stays on Truth. The cutter into the neckbreaker looks to end things but here’s Punk to throw the match out at about 2:45.

Post match Heyman runs away as the other guys fight.

Vince tells HHH he’s using reverse psychology on Bryan because he wants someone like HHH to beat Cena. Vince makes jokes about HHH’s age but Stephanie comes in to cool things down. She recommends a corporate makeover. Oh joy.

Ryback vs. John Cena

Tables match. This has been the house show main event for months. Ryback pounds on him to start but Cena clotheslines him out to the floor. The first table is pulled out but Ryback gets in a quick shot to stop Cena. He tries to ram the table into Cena against the post but John moves out of the way. We take a really abrupt break and come back with Ryback in control. Cena escapes the powerbomb on the floor but Ryback rams him into the post to keep momentum.

Ryback sets up the steps and bridges a table between them and the ring. Cena gets in a shot and tries to put Ryback through the table but gets caught in a snap suplex on the floor. Back in and Cena grabs a quick STF but Ryback pulls himself into the ropes, literally forcing a break. Cena throws a table out to the floor but Ryback hides under the ring. He pops out the other side and spears Cena down before setting up an identicle table to steps bridge. One of them is shoved over but Cena can’t get the AA.

Instead Ryback pounds Cena down and tries a gorilla press but Cena slides to the other side of the table. Ryback crushes the table with the steps so Cena picks up a set of his own. They throw the steps at each other and amazingly enough they bounce off each other. Back inside and the ProtoBomb onto the steps puts Ryback down. There’s the Shuffle but Ryback stops him from setting up a table with the over the shoulder Stunner. The table is set up in the corner and the Meat Hook puts Cena down. Ryback loads up another but Cena catches him in the AA through the table for the win at 16:30.

Rating: C+. Match of the night here but that’s not saying much at all. The good thing about having the same match so many times on house shows is you can have a good version of it by muscle memory alone, so the result here was pretty good. A ticked off and violent Ryback works as a villain (assuming he actually wins something one day) so the result was pretty good.

Post match here’s Bryan to take the belt but Cena snatches it back, saying Bryan has to earn this. A YES chant ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. This show never once got interesting. I’m guessing it’s due to the show being taped, but there was nothing on here to get fired up about at all. It’s like they threw three hours of TV out there and hoped people would get into it at some point. This was very dull and felt like it was eight hours long instead of three.

Results

Shield b. Mark Henry/Usos – Bulldog Driver to Jimmy

Rob Van Dam b. Fandango via countout

Kaitly b. AJ Lee – Spear

Dolph Ziggler b. Big E. Langston via DQ when AJ interfered

Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Small Package

Brie Bella b. Natayla – Rollup

John Cena b. Ryback – AA through a table

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my author page at Amazon with wrestling books as low as $4 at:

The Wrestlemania edition.So for those of you that remember, Wrestlemania 27 featured Edge successfully defending the World Heavyweight Championship against Alberto Del Rio.  This would mark his last match due to a previously known neck injury.  Soon after this on Raw, Edge retired and vacated the world title.  Here’s what I wonder:

What makes Edge so special?  Why does he get to win his last match at Wrestlemania?  Let’s look at some others who had their last (or presumably their last) match at Wrestlemania:

Steve Austin at Wrestlemania 19 – Pinned by Rock

Rock at Wrestlemania 20 (last match for eight years) – On the losing team

Ric Flair at Wrestlemania 24 – Pinned by Shawn Michaels

Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania 26 – Pinned by Undertaker

What makes Edge so special that he gets to win?  His career was over and he knew it, but they gave him the win anyway.  Del Rio took months if not years to recover (arguably he never did) and it was all about Edge for the next several weeks.

Why does Edge get this special treatment?

If you can, make sure to catch the replay of this.  It’s one of the funniest shows I’ve seen in years and is far more of a train wreck than the previews made it out to be.  Find a copy of it and kick back for an hour because it’s the funniest thing a wrestling fan has seen in a long time.

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 26, 2004
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

So last night I spent four hours downloading a copy of this show. Then I found it all on Youtube. Anyway this is another request and it’s because the main event is an Iron Man match for the title between HHH and Benoit. The only other match on the card is a battle royal for the shot at Benoit at Summerslam. Let’s get to it.

We see the Diva Search girls in the back. Of the ten, five would wind up with jobs unless I’m forgetting some of them. Some blonde named Julia is gone. Michelle, Christy, Amy Webber, Joy Giovanni and Carmella are still in there. Oh and Maria so it’s 6/10. Tonight, the 9 remaining ones have to verbally seduce a former WWE star.

Clip of Benoit winning the Rumble then winning the title at Mania. HHH says the games are ending and tonight it’s the two of them for the title.

Theme song opens us up.

We go to the ring and it’s almost full. A few more come out though. Edge is one of the few to get entrances. He’s the IC Champion here. Matt gets one as well. The announcers don’t know what this is. Jericho comes out to a big pop. Kane comes out as well as JR and King are at a loss for words. Evolution (minus HHH) are in this also. Eric comes out and says it’s a twenty man battle royal and the winner gets the title shot at Summerslam.

Battle Royal

Regal is put out first. Jericho and Flair chop it out before Jericho and Edge team up to put Tomko out. Edge spears Palumbo down and the Canadians throw him out. RKO to Jericho but Edge saves him from Evolution. Flair hits Edge low and we take a break. Back with JR being way too excited. Kane eliminated Val Venis and Matt Hardy during the break. Matt came back in and beat on Kane but didn’t eliminate him.

Hurricane is out as are Rodney Mack, Rosey and a guy I didn’t recognize. I think it was Steven Richards. Tajiri puts Rob Conway out and Grenier is out as well. We have about eight left. Tajiri tries the Tarantula on Kane and is tossed out. We have the three members of Evolution, Kane, Jericho, Edge, Rhyno and Maven for our final eight. Flair goes up top for no logically explained reason. Edge slams him back into the ring for no logically explained reason.

Jericho hooks Flair in the Walls but Batista makes the save. Edge spears Kane down but he sits up. We take a break and come back with all eight still in it. Edge almost got eliminated during the break but low blowed his way out of it. Flair tries to chop Kane which goes as well as you would expect. Kane very carefully chokeslams him and it’s time for the battle of the bulls.

Batista and Kane slug it out (I remember watching this live) and Big Dave spinebusters him down but walks into a Gore to a BIG pop. Why is Maven still in there? Why is he getting to throw Flair into the corner for the (failed) Flair Flip? WHY IS HE CLOTHESLINING FLAIR OUT??? Rhyno Gores Maven and Batista throws Rhyno out. The Canadians go after Kane and everyone gangs up on him to get him out.

So we have Orton, Batista, Maven, Jericho and Edge left. Maven sends Orton to the apron but he hangs on. Orton manages to suplex Maven onto the top rope and then dump him to get us to the final four and a PPV level tag match. Jericho and Edge manage to get rid of Batista and Jericho turns on Edge to get us down to two. Slugout is won by Orton and he hits something like a spinebuster to take over.

In a smart move he tries a slingshot but Jericho hooks the rope. He pulls himself back in and grabs Orton into a fireman’s carry but Orton escapes as well. Jericho gets thrown again but he skins the cat. Orton clotheslines him to the apron again but he holds on with one arm. They do the Big Show/Benoit sequence but Orton lands on the apron. They’re both on the apron now and they slug it out. Both guys get knocked down but they hang on. Orton slides back in and hits an RKO (kind of) onto the middle rope then kicks Jericho out to go to Summerslam.

Rating: B-. I was enjoying this a lot more than most regular battle royals. These matches are always hard to rate because other than the Rumble, if you’ve seen one battle royal, you’ve seen almost all of them. This had star power and drama in it though which made this better than most. Good match and it gave us a mostly surprising winner.

Time for the Divas nonsense. What this has to do with getting a contract to be a female wrestler is beyond me but whatever. All nine of them have 20 seconds to verbally seduce a former WWE Superstar. Michelle starts first and it’s Kamala. She does the whole sexy teacher thing and yeah I’m not going to comment on most of this. Christy looks good in blue though. This goes nowhere and isn’t funny or anything like that. I get how it could be funny once or so but this happens NINE TIMES. This eats up like 8 minutes.

Smackdown recap.

Smackdown Your Vote at the Democratic National Convention. You’ll NEVER see this today. To be fair they went to the GOP National Convention as well and this was non-partisan.

Here are the Diva Search chicks in bikinis and numbers to call to vote for them. This went on OVER TWO MONTHS.

HHH comes in to see Evolution and Orton says it’ll be an honor to face him at Summerslam. He wishes HHH good luck but HHH says he doesn’t need it.

Raw World Title: HHH vs. Chris Benoit

HHH is challenging and it’s an Iron Man match. They do the referee instructions and they say if there’s a tie, it’s sudden death. Slugout to start but it turns into more of a feeling out process. Benoit takes it to the mat with a headlock and into a top wristlock with Benoit bridging out of it very nicely. Crossface is attempted but HHH rolls out. Back in the Pedigree is easily escaped and it’s a standoff.

HHH tries to take it to the mat but Benoit gets the advantage. Five minutes in and HHH rolls to the floor to escape the Crossface attempt again. After a quick trip to the floor, Benoit goes after the knee. Benoit slams him at eight minutes in and stays on the knee. Chris runs into a boot in the corner and a DDT takes him down. Benoit comes back with chops but walks into the Facebuster. Pedigree is countered into a Sharpshooter attempt but that’s countered too. He hooks a Crossface out of nowhere though but HHH rolls out, but Benoit rolls him up for the first fall with about 49:30 to go.

We take a break and come back with 46:15 to go and HHH in a chinlock. Snap suplex gets two. Off to an abdominal stretch as this has been almost all Benoit. HHH manages to send him over the top and Benoit hits his back on the apron. The Game rams him into the apron and starts working it over. Benoit tries a charge but gets kicked in the face, busting his mouth open.

Benoit tries to whip him in but falls down. That’s either good selling of the back or a rare botch. They try it again and HHH gets whipped over the top to the floor. Benoit tries a suicide dive but hits mostly the barricade. Both guys are down as we hear about the Pegasus Kid. We’re about twenty minutes in now. We take a break with both guys down.

Back with HHH still down and thirty seven minutes to go. During the break HHH went into the steps and might have a bad shoulder now. Benoit tries a Sharpshooter (in a rare misstep of psychology) but HHH escapes. Off to a freaky modified Indian Deathlock with thirty six minutes to go. Chris stays on the leg with a Figure Four and a decent one at that. HHH makes the rope so Benoit pounds away in the corner.

HHH hot shots him out for two with thirty three minutes left. Benoit is like CANADA POWER and hits rolling Germans to take HHH down. Here’s the Swan Dive but HHH rolls away. HHH sends him into the buckle chest first, which is apparently an injury from a few weeks ago. Pedigree ties us up at about halfway through.

Benoit rolls to the floor but HHH knocks him down again and front suplexes him onto the steps for a countout to make it 2-1. We take another break and come back with 25:30 to go and HHH whipping Benoit into the corner for two. Release suplex lands on the chest again and gets two. Another whip into the corner gets two. 23:20 to go. HHH starts working on the back for some reason but Benoit hammers him in the face with a forearm to put both guys down. A spinebuster out of nowhere makes it 3-1 HHH with just under 22:00 to go.

There’s another break and we come back with Benoit hiptossing him at 18:30 to go. HHH loads up a Pedigree but Benoit dead weights him and goes for a Sharpshooter but HHH counters again. Pedigree attempt #2 is countered into the Sharpshooter which this time is hooked. HHH is in big trouble as Benoit keeps pulling him back from the ropes. He FINALLY (not meant as a bad thing) taps out to make it 3-2 with 15:30 to go.

15:00 to go and HHH falls to the floor. Benoit follows him out and pounds away but HHH runs back into the ring. Back in Benoit charges into a foot but HHH jumps into the Crossface. He eventually gets his foot to the rope but Benoit immediately hooks it again and HHH taps out to tie things up with 12:00 to go.

Here come Batista and Flair and we take a break. Back with about 8:30 to go and Benoit getting sent to the outside. Eight minutes left and HHH blocks a sunset flip to send Benoit back outside. Batista sends Benoit into the post and the champ is busted open. That gets two with 6:30 to go. HHH pounds him down in the corner with 6:00 to go. Benoit ducks a punch and comes back with rolling Germans. The referee gets clotheslined and Benoit grabs the Crossface.

Batista distracts Benoit and Flair throws in a chair with 5:00 to go. Flair gets knocked off and HHH caves in the back of Benoit’s head with the chair. He covers but there’s no referee. Bischoff sends out another referee who counts two. Four minutes left and HHH clocks the other referee. Evolution beats on Benoit but someone comes through the crowd.

Of all people, it’s EUGENE, who is still one of the most popular acts in years at this point. He cleans house, beating up Evolution all by himself. Stunner to Flair and a Rock Bottom to HHH. Bischoff gets a right hand as well and HHH gets killed with the chair. Eugene had been beaten down by Evolution two weeks before if you’re wondering why he’s here. Benoit comes back in with 1:20 to go. Eugene throws the referee back in for the pin on HHH with six seconds left and Benoit retains with a final score of 4-3.

Rating: B-. The match is certainly good, but I see no reason at all here for this to be an Iron Man match. This easily could have been cut down to about thirty or even forty minutes and nothing would have been lost. The ending is ridiculous with there being nothing resembling a regular match for the last five minutes. Good match and it set up Summerslam, but absolutely no reason for it to be an Iron Man match.

Overall Rating: B. Good show with an interesting twist by having basically two angles the entire show plus the Divas nonsense. At the end of the day though, you can only complain so much about good looking women in swimsuits though. Fun show but it’s not something that would work every time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my author page at Amazon with wrestling books as low as $4 at:

Smackdown
Date: July 26, 2013
Location: American Bank Center, Corpus Christi, Texas
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re closing in on Summerslam and the main story on Smackdown is we have no #1 contender to the title. Orton beat Del Rio clean last week but wasn’t even on Raw to acknowledge the win. Alberto doesn’t have any feud going right now and is just kind of floating around having random match after random match. Odds are tonight will be spent building up the Raw matches for the PPV. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence gets things going.

Randy Orton vs. Damien Sandow

Sandow is glad the fans have taken the time off from watching the bug zapper to be here tonight. He’s the uncrowned world champion and we’re welcome for that. Randy elbows him down to start but Sandow grabs a headlock to slow things down. Some shoulders into the ribs have Orton in trouble but he sends Sandow into the corner and fires off right hands to take over. A suplex gets two and Randy stomps on Sandow’s fingers. Damien comes back with a shot to the knee but Orton throws him out to the floor.

A drop onto the barricade gets two for Randy but Sandow fires off shoulder in the corner to get a breather. Orton punches out of the corner and knocks Sandow to the apron. The Elevated DDT is countered with a guillotine on the top rope for two as we take a break. Back with Orton pounding down right hands in the corner but Sandow drapes him over the top rope for two. We hit a bodyscissors on Orton as we get an awkward audio edit. The fans sounded like they were chanting We Want Cody but it almost immediately turned into a Randy chant, only to go back to the Cody chant a few moments later.

Sandow hits the Russian legsweep and the Wind-Up Elbow for two before going back to the bodyscissors. Orton punches his way out and hits the powerslam but here’s Cody for a distraction before the Elevated DDT can connect. Rhodes picks up the briefcase and walks away with it, allowing Orton to hit the RKO for the pin at 11:26 shown of 14:26.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing special because there was no reason to think Sandow was going to win. It’s the flaw with how WWE books Money in the Bank: they think it’s some magic pill that makes up for months of losses for a guy like Sandow, but people realize the guy never wins anything. I did some quick research on this and Sandow has won a total of two matches on Raw or Smackdown this year. People aren’t going to buy him as a world title contender because he beat Brodus and R-Truth but lost every other match on the main shows. Why WWE thinks this works is beyond me but we’re stuck with it.

Cody takes the briefcase with him.

Here’s Punk to an eruption with something to say. Punk says he got what he wanted with the Best vs. the Beast. Heyman taught him a lot about being the dirtiest player in the game, including how to go after your opponent’s weak spot and that’s exactly what he’s going to do to Lesnar at Summerslam. Lesnar’s greatest weakness is trusting Paul Heyman which is what Punk did for so many years. Paul did help Punk get to the WWE but it was all for himself.

Heyman knew that Punk was going to be successful so he put a stamp of approval on Punk to look like he did something. Paul always wanted Punk vs. Lesnar but he wanted to be in both corners. At Summerslam, Punk is going to take everything Heyman has ever wanted and then he’s going to kick Lesnar in the face over and over until there’s nothing left of him. Then there’s only going to be Heyman left……and here’s Fandango. He dances to the ring but the beating is on before anything can be said. Punk puts Fandango to sleep and is left alone in the ring.

1-800-Fella ad. It’s amusing but can we please give Sheamus something interesting to do? The guy is talented and over but he gets these horrible feuds where he’s treated like he’s invincible which doesn’t do anything for anyone.

Prime Time Players/Wade Barrett vs. Mark Henry/Usos

So Henry is a face again just a month after they told us how horrible he was for lying about his retirement. Such is life in wrestling. Jey cranks on Darren’s arm to start before it’s off to Jimmy for some right hands. Titus breaks up the offense with a cheap shot and it’s off to Barrett for some forearms in the corner.

The announcers keep us up to date with Royal Family news because that’s what people watch wrestling to hear. Titus comes in for a chinlock followed by a fall away slam to send Jimmy flying. The Uso comes back with a kick to the head and it’s hot tag to Henry. Everything breaks down and the World’s Strongest Slam ends Titus at 3:29.

Rating: D+. Quick tag team formula here with Henry playing the role of house cleaner perfectly. Shield vs. Henry/Usos should be good stuff if they’re given enough time on Monday but something tells me they’ll have to rush through everything which brings things down. On an unrelated note, why Darren Young still has a job eludes me.

Alberto comes in to see Vickie and suggests Vickie should let him pick his opponent for Summerslam. Vickie gives him a week to think about it but RVD, Alberto’s opponent tonight, comes in to offer himself as an opponent.

Sandow is looking for the briefcase and finds Sin Cara, who doesn’t look to be nearly as muscular as I remember him being. Real or imposter, Cara can’t help Damien and the search continues.

Rob Van Dam vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title. RVD fires off right hands to start but Del Rio bails to the floor to break the momentum. He stays on the floor for a long time as Cole makes fun of JBL’s title reign. “You held the title for a very long time without ever winning a match.” JBL: “Watch it.” Back in and RVD pounds away in the corner but the referee pulls him back with Del Rio shouting NO MAS. Rob goes after him again but gets caught by a superkick for the pin at 2:11. Of that 2:11, they made contact for maybe 40 seconds.

Sandow is still looking for the case. He comes up on Mark Henry who steps aside to reveal Booker T. Booker is a big man but Henry literally blocked him out. Neither will say where Cody is but they agree he’s a thief. Sandow says Booker used to be GM and Henry has to talk Mr. T. down.

Here’s AJ for the state of her mind address. Before she gets started we get a clip of Langston nearly kissing her last week. AJ says she’s here to clear the air: she isn’t just a nudge away from a breakdown because of the issues with Kaitlyn and Dolph, although she goes on for a good while about how horrible Ziggler is. She’s just fine because she’s the Divas Champion and will be forever. Just to show you how fine she is, here are the keys to Ziggler’s house. She planned to use them to break in and burn the place down but here’s Ziggler to interrupt her.

Dolph says he’s passed out thousands of those keys before and the locks have been changed a few times since her. AJ smiles and has Langston pull out Dolph’s suitcase. Ziggler says everything in the ring right now is replaceable so AJ pulls out Dolph’s wallet. She has a pair of scissors for some reason but Ziggler says a day at the DMV is a picnic compared to any time with AJ.

She cuts up his passport but Dolph says there’s a passport agency two blocks from his house and the girl there owes him a favor because of something that isn’t PG. AJ gets angrier and angrier and throws out Ziggler’s cash. There goes the Visa as the fans tell AJ she’s a psycho. AJ insists she’s fine and starts throwing around Dolph’s clothes, only to break down when she sees one of her old shirts.

Dolph keeps shrugging this off as AJ freaks out more and more. She goes to the floor and slaps the apron, only to walk into a spear from Kaitlyn. Langston goes to check on her and gets a Fameasser on the floor. This was different but I liked it for the most part. Ziggler shrugging off all the losses made sense given how replaceable all that stuff was.

Raw ReBound talks about Bryan’s gauntlet match and Cena making the save post match.

Wyatt Family vs. Tons of Funk

Bray is in the rocking chair so this is Luke Harper/Erick Rowan doing the work. Harper goes right after Tensai to start but everything quickly breaks down. Brodus is sent to the floor so Rowan can drag Tensai across the ring by the chin. Harper hits his discus lariat on Tensai and a splash from Rowan is good for the pin at 1:03.

Post match Bray says this isn’t Tensai’s fault and hits Sister Abigail (spinning downward spiral). Bray says he suspects Kane will be looking for him but he’s not too hard to find. If you need him, he’ll be right here with all his friends. They’ve been waiting for Kane and always have been. Still good stuff.

Sandow comes in to see Vickie but she doesn’t know about the case. She says give it time but Sandow wants it back tonight and storms off.

Christian vs. Jack Swagger

Before the match, Colter asks if we’re in Texas or north Mexico. The border agent didn’t bother to check Colter’s car though because Colter is a Real American. Swagger takes him to the mat and does push-ups on Christian’s back while shouting WE THE PEOPLE. Back up and Christian slaps him in the face before firing off right hands in the corner. Christian backdrops him to the floor and follows up with a pretty lame plancha. Back in and Swagger runs the ropes for a belly to belly and we go to a break.

Back with Christian hitting a middle rope missile dropkick and an uppercut to the jaw. A high cross misses Swagger but the gutwrench powerbomb is countered into a failed Killswitch bid. Another powerbomb attempt is countered into the reverse DDT for two but Swagger comes back with a kind of belly to belly for two. The Vader Bomb hits knees and Christian’s sunset flip out of the corner gets two. Swagger misses a charge into the post and the Killswitch is good for the pin at 4:46 shown of 7:46.

Rating: C-. Nothing to see here. Swagger has wrestled the same match for years now and this was about the same thing you would have expected from him. Christian was his usual smooth self out there but there’s nothing new to see here at all. It wasn’t a bad match or anything but it just came and went.

Before Christian can leave, here’s an irate Sandow to continue the search for his briefcase. As soon as the authorities get here, there’s going to be a warrant issued for Cody’s arrest. Vickie needs to fire Cody for being a thief but before Sandow can keep ranting, Cody pops up on screen with the case. He’s not in the arena but rather in front of the Gulf of Mexico. If Sandow wants his case back, he can come get it.

Damien storms out and goes outside as we take a break. Sandow goes after Cody but Rhodes threatens to throw the case in the water. Sandow keeps coming but Cody gets ready to throw it. Damien admits that Cody is smarter and carried the Scholars. He even has better facial hair. Cody says Damien has earned this and throws the case in the water. Damien shrieks and stops dead as Cody leaves. Damien can’t swim so he can’t go after the case, but he dives in anyway. He can’t get to it and comes back to land where he cries to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Well that was different. I’ll give them points for focusing on something different to build the show around, but at the end of the day there’s so little interest in Sandow or the title he can cash in on that it’s hard to get excited. Cody vs. Sandow should be a fun feud but it’s not going anywhere unless Cody wins the case or Del Rio drops the title.

The rest of the show was entertaining and it was very nice to see the focus off the traditional stuff. Using Smackdown to develop these other characters and stories is a great use of the time and far more interesting than a Raw supplement. Good stuff this week and a different kind of show.

Results

Randy Orton b. Damien Sandow – RKO

Mark Henry/Usos b. Prime Time Players/Wade Barrett – World’s Strongest Slam to O’Neil

Alberto Del Rio b. Rob Van Dam – Superkick

Wyatt Family b. Tons of Funk – Splash to Tensai

Christian b. Jack Swagger – Killswitch

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