TLC 2011 Preview

It’s the end of the year and I’m really not looking forward to this.I’ve made no secret out of the fact that I think this show looks weak.  I thought it might be fun to compare last year’s card to this year’s.

 

IC Title: last year we had Ziggler vs. Swagger vs. Kofi in a three way ladder match which was rather entertaining and had a creative ending.  This year, it’s Cody defending against an announcer in a non-ladder match.  Advantage: 2010.

 

US Title: last year it was defended in a dark match.  This year it should be Ryder finally getting the title he’s chased for four months.  Advantage: 2011.

 

Divas: last year it was a tag team tables match, this year they’re not on the card.  Advantage: push.  Seriously, the Divas not being on the card is a GOOD thing in 2011.

 

Featured ladder match: last year it was Sheamus vs. Morrison in what I thought was the best match of the night.  This year it’s HHH vs. Nash in a match that SUCKED in 2003 and now it’s 8 years later.  Advantage: you do the math.

 

Featured tables match: last year it was Miz vs. Orton for the title.  This year it’s Orton vs. Barrett in a pretty well built grudge match.  Advantage: 2011.  That match last year sucked.

 

TLC Match: last year it was a fatal fourway with Kane defending against Edge, Del Rio and Mysterio in what I thoguht was a good match.  This year it’s a triple threat with practically no heat.  Advantage: 2010.

 

Featured chairs match: last year it was Cena vs. Barrett and a definitive ending to the Cena vs. Nexus feud.  This year it’s Show vs. Henry for the Smackdown Title.  Advantage: 2010, but not in a total runaway as Show vs. Henry has been a decent feud.

 

John Cena: last year, in the main event.  This year, not on the card.  Game, set and match – 2010.

 

I just don’t care about this show.  It hasn’t been built up that well at all and I’m not sure what the main event actually is.  You would assume the TLC match due to it being the namesake, but that wasn’t the case last year.  I REALLY don’t want HHH vs. Nash going on last due to black hole levels of suck.  The Raw Title could go last but I’m not interested in that match at all.  Show vs. Henry just isn’t a PPV ending match.  In short, there isn’t a big time match this year and that’s really hurting the show.

 

As for predictions, I’ll take Punk, Henry, HHH (but I have a hunch on Nash), Cody and Ryder.

 

Your thoughts/predictions?




Smackdown – December 16, 2011 – Pretty Basic Go Home Show

Smackdown
Date: December 16, 2011
Location: RBC Center, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Booker T, Josh Matthews

It’s the final show before TLC and I’m only kind of looking forward to the show. I don’t know if it’s the lack of anything resembling an awesome heel or what, but I can’t get fired up for this show at all. It’s not just me as I’ve heard that WWE is expecting it to do awful business. Either way, this should be an ok show as Smackdown is almost guaranteed to be anymore. Let’s get to it.

Do you know your enemy? Mine is the global warming due to it being in the fifties in the middle of December.

Big Show faces Jack Swagger tonight. Is there a reason for that? Was Long mad at Henry or something? Also Barrett/Ziggler vs. Ryder/Orton.

We open with Booker T being brought out to be interviewed by Josh. Booker asks the fans if he looks ready. He was ready to become a commentator but Cody had to make things physical. Booker refuses to become a legitimizer for Cody. He hasn’t thought about returning to the ring full time, but he’ll cross that bridge when he wins the title. Cue Cody who says that on Sunday we might see some nostalgia and maybe even a rush of offense that makes people say Booker is back.

If it was a movie, Booker would win and Cody would leave in disgrace. But this isn’t a movie. What’s going to happen when Booker’s legs give out and Booker falls to Cody? Booker wants to know how Cody feels about the reality of him beating Cody up right now. Cody is facing Bryan tonight and if Booker interferes again, he’ll lose his title match and Cody will work to get him suspended. Booker needs to get out of the ring so Cody can show him how legitimate he already is, sucka. Great promo from Cody.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes

Booker gets in on commentary and Bryan still has bad ribs. Booker even apologizes for interfering in the previous two matches. Bryan goes for a quick LeBell Lock but Cody hits the floor. We take a break and come back with Bryan holding a headlock. Here’s a surfboard attempt but Bryan just rams Cody’s knees into the mat instead. To the apron and Cody suplexes Bryan to the floor in a good looking bump.

Cody works on the bad ribs as Cole runs down Booker. Booker says he’ll defend the title if he wins it, implying he’ll be back full time. Bryan gets in some kicks but Cody takes him down again for two. Bryan gets some rollups for some far falls. He hits something for two but we had the camera on Booker instead of the ring so I have no idea what he used.

Here are the kicks in the corner but Cody gets a foot up to break up the charge. Bryan tries a belly to back superplex but Cody floats on top for two. The ribs on Bryan are starting to take their toll on his offense as they exchange rollups into the Cross Rhodes for the pin for Cody at 5:46 shown of 9:16.

Rating: C+. These two have decent chemistry together and this was another example of it. Having Cole and Booker argue the whole time was annoying and took away from the match, but at least they were talking about the feud at hand and not something stupid like Twitter or whatever else they can waste their time with. Good match but it needed more time to really become something special.

Alicia Fox vs. Natalya

Nattie brings out the tissues which isn’t working as well as the screaming CRY at other Divas. Josh tells us that Kelly, Eve and Alicia will be blogging for Perez Hilton. I’m trying to care even less than I do and it’s just not working. Natalya works on the ribs but Alicia gets a small package for the pin at 1:01. Correction: I’ve found something I care about even less than the Hilton thing.

Alicia pulled some of the extensions out of Natalya’s hair. Alicia says she just got out foxed. Oh geez. Natalya charges in post match so Alicia tries a spinning legdrop, hitting Natalya right on the forehead. And she’s going to get pushed isn’t she?

We look at the video of the nominees for Pipe Bomb of the Year. At least this was funny.

Swagger says he’ll win tonight. Henry comes up and says if Swagger hurts Big Show, he’ll get a title shot. Swagger says he’ll hurt Big Show, but for himself, not for Henry. He says Henry is losing on Sunday and that he’ll win the title in the future. He really is sounding more like a face every week, which would be the best thing that could happen to him.

Usos vs. Primo/Epico

When I say the Usos should be on TV more, I don’t mean jobbing to the latest Hispanic team. At least I get my Siva Tao and to look at Rosa Mendes. So is Hunico gone? The Usos take over on Epico to start and Booker says the Usos remind him of Harlem Heat. Off to Primo who hammers on I believe Jey. After a chinlock he fights back and Booker says he’s not in his own Fave Five. Everything breaks down and Jey hits a superkick to Primo. He loads up the splash but Rosa distracts him, allowing a Backstabber to get the pin at 2:59. This was fine.

To hype up Swagger vs. Show, they show a clip of a match from July of 2010. Seriously?

Jack Swagger vs. Big Show

Swagger even does the push-ups so you know he’s serious. Almost immediately Henry comes out with a chair in hand. Swagger tries to jump Big Show but it doesn’t work that well for him. Jack takes out the leg but it doesn’t exactly last that long. After a brief beating on the floor, Show chops away in the corner. Henry is sitting in the aisle in the chair.

All Big Show here as this is more of an exhibition for Henry than anything else. Notice something Big Show does here: the telling the crowd to be silent for the chops. The chop gets a big pop for that and a part of that is due to him talking to the crowd. Think back to guys like Hogan, Sting, Austin, Rock, Flair etc. They all got huge reactions and they all directly talked to the crowd, be it through shouting at them, talking to fans in the front row, asking their approval for something etc. It’s an old standard and it still works today. Fans like being involved in the show, even in tiny ways like that.

Swagger gets in a shoulder to the knee and the Vader Bomb gets no cover. The second one gets two but Show fires him off like he’s nothing. Show starts his comeback despite barely being in trouble. Swagger rolls through the chokeslam into the ankle lock and Show is in trouble. After being in the hold over 30 seconds, Show kicks him off, pops up and kills Swagger dead with the WMD at 5:47.

Rating: C+. This was way better than I was expecting at all. Swagger got in some offense here and the match was actually somewhat competitive. He needs to turn face soon though because he’s floundered so much for the past year and a half. There’s no personality to him and that could be said for most of the heels on the roster. A turn and a Kurt Angle style character for him could work very well.

Henry blasts Swagger and a production guy with the chair post match.

Ryder comes up to Orton in the back and wants to know if they’re on the same page. Orton says no. Same book? Maybe. Ryder is very happy for that and fist pumps. He leaves and Orton almost looks disturbed. Funny segment and it only lasted like 20 seconds.

Ted DiBiase vs. Heath Slater

Cole rants about the DiBiase Posse stuff before the match. I’d go to one of those if there was a show in Lexington. Slater slaps him in the face and DiBiase goes off, sending him to the floor and hammering away. Slater takes over back in the ring and hits a forearm off the top for two. He comes off the middle rope and jumps into an atomic drop. The following clothesline leads to Dream Street for the pin at 3:09.

Rating: D+. DiBiase is getting a nice little push lately but I’d kind of like for it to go somewhere. He’s done the same stuff for weeks now and I’d certainly hope the Mahal feud isn’t the highlight of his push. The Posse thing is a decent idea and it gives him something to do. Not a horrible match and Slater gets to job even more which is really all he’s good at anymore.

Mahal comes in and beats down DiBiase post match. Since he’s Indian he uses a camel clutch. Teddy comes out and says break it up. If Mahal wants a match, he can fight Sheamus.

Jinder Mahal vs. Sheamus

Very nice pop for Sheamus. Sheamus works on the arm to start until Mahal pounds away on him a bit. Sheamus is like screw that and hits a big elbow to put Jinder back down. The forearms to the chest don’t work and we get a chase scene on the floor. Now the forearms hit but with Sheamus on the apron instead of in the ring. Slingshot shoulder gets two. Cole says Mahal kind of floats. Odd description but ok then. A swinging neckbreaker gets two for Mahal and he hooks a chinlock. Sheamus wakes up and hits his signature stuff and the Brogue Kick is good for the win at 3:50.

Rating: C. Pretty much just an extended squash here. Mahal got in some offense for a change but it’s not like Sheamus was ever in any real danger. Jinder hasn’t done anything since he and Khali split and Sheamus is kind of just waiting around to be the next guy to challenge Henry once Show gets done with him I’d assume. Not a bad match here but really just a way to get Sheamus on the show.

Video on the Slammys eat up some time. Cole won another from WWE.com for Most Regrettable Ring Attire for when he dressed as HHH.

Video on HHH vs. Nash which is happening for some reason that we’re still waiting on. I know the storyline but why is this match happening period? Nash isn’t going to be anything full time (for the love of all things good and holy I hope not at least) and HHH is probably going to face Taker at Mania given what he said on Monday, so I don’t get the point in these two having a featured match on Sunday. I guess it’s because he’s HHH.

Randy Orton/Zack Ryder vs. Dolph Ziggler/Wade Barrett

No complaints about putting two feuds together into one match. A second coming video interrupts Orton’s entrance. I’ve heard a few answers for this and one is more interesting than the other. It’ll likely be Jericho though. Ziggler vs. Ryder starts us off. Ryder takes over with punches and a flapjack. Off to Orton who slows things way down and does the Garvin Stomp.

Back to Ryder who Ziggler beats up so he can’t tag in Orton again to bore us to tears. Now Barrett comes in to beat up Ryder for awhile. Orton gets a tag so Barrett bails quickly. We’re waiting on the big showdown between them here. Orton focuses on Barrett too much though and Ziggler gets in a shot to take over. The backbreaker is broken up so Ryder comes in to send Ziggler to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Orton pounding Ziggler in the corner. The jumping knee drop gets two. Ziggler gets in a single shot and falls into the corner so Barrett can come in. A big boot puts Barrett down and Orton is in trouble. Ziggler hammers on him and gets two. Orton gets a belly to back suplex on Barrett and there’s the moderately hot tag to Ryder. Ryder gets the knee up in the corner and the Broski Boot (BIG pop for the fist pump) but Ziggler breaks up the Rough Ryder.

Ziggler kicks out of a rollup and hooks a half crab on Ryder. Back to Barrett for a chinlock. They’re going through the motions very badly here. It’s not a bad match but it’s as basic of a tag match as it could possibly be. Wasteland is countered into a DDT to put both guys down. There’s the real hot tag to Orton who cleans house. Snap powerslam puts Ziggy down as does the over the shoulder neckbreaker. Ryder and Barrett go to the floor and Ziggler misses the Fameasser so the RKO can end him at 11:53 shown of 15:23.

Rating: C. Average is the perfect thing to call this match. It wasn’t a bad match or anything and I’d have been fine with this being the main event of a house show. They advanced both feuds which is the right idea but I would have liked to see something between Orton vs. Barrett. Decent main event but it’s absolutely nothing special at all.

Overall Rating: C. Not a terrible show and they plugged the majority of TLC”s matches just fine, but at the same time I wasn’t exactly thrilled by watching it. I think the problem is that TLC is just a dull looking show overall. It feels like a show that is there with a bunch of gimmick matches on it because the calendar says that it’s time for a show with a bunch of gimmick matches on it. There’s no real heat on most of the matches and it’ll probably end with a show that is fine but not particularly interesting at the same time.

Results
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan – Cross Rhodes
Alicia Fox b. Natalya – Small Package
Epico/Primo b. Usos – Backstabber to Jey
Big Show b. Jack Swagger – WMD
Ted DiBiase b. Heath Slater – Dream Street
Sheamus b. Jinder Mahal – Brogue Kick
Randy Orton/Zack Ryder b. Wade Barrett/Dolph Ziggler – RKO to Ziggler

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NXT – December 14, 2011 – The Love Triangle Continues

NXT
Date: December 14, 2011
Location: RBC Center, Raleigh, North Carolina
Commentators: Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

We’re almost to the end of the year and we’re in the ninth month of this show. This show could have been a whole pregnancy by this point. After last week, it appears we have a second good guy rookie in the form of Derrick Bateman. Given that he’s been one of the most worthless characters in recent memory, that can’t really be a bad thing. Let’s get to it.

If this show is the search for the next breakout star, how dim is this star that it’s taken them this long to find it?

Tyler Reks/Curt Hawkins vs. Trent Barretta/Yoshi Tatsu

Reks says the two of them aren’t rookies and they’ll never beg for support from dirty North Carolinians. Trent calls them grumpy and Yoshi tells Reks to wash his hair. That’s the latest chant and according to Striker, it’ll be trending. Just….no. Tyler gets double teamed to start but Yoshi takes too much time on the top and is slammed down. Yoshi gets beaten down by both guys as Striker tries to get Hawkins nickname over as “And 1”.

Not very hot tag brings in Trent who beats on Hawkins and hits a top rope cross body for two. Barretta doesn’t get to be on TV much and has a pretty basic cruiserweight style, but he’s very smooth out there. Speaking of smooth, Trent spins out of what looked like a slam attempt into a rollup on Hawkins for the pin at 4:00.

Rating: C-. Not bad but I’m over Reks and Hawkins. They’re not interesting at all and they keep showing up and talking about how great they used to be. They’re about as low on the heel totem pole as you can get and that’s not a place that I’m interested in watching. I would however like to see more of Barretta. He’s just fun to watch for some reason.

Percy Watson has a talk show now. Let’s get this over with. The subject is the saga of Bateman/Curtis/Maxine. We get a LONG video on the whole thing, concluding with Maxine ending the engagement last week. Here’s Bateman and Percy asks him if there’s anything going on between Bateman and Maxine’s mama. Bateman says that’s insane, just like all women.

Cue Curtis who shows a still of Derrick kissing the finger of Maxine’s mom as it’s against his lips. Curtis talks about how JTG said that he and Maxine left together and that wasn’t true. Cue JTG and Watson asked why he said that. JTG says Curtis paid him to do it. Curtis denies this and JTG leaves. Cue Maxine now who says she’s tired of all this stuff. Bateman: “That girl is so crazy, how can you not want to spend the rest of your life with her?” Curtis: “She doesn’t like you man.” Bateman drops Curtis and leaves. Watson laughs and Curtis goes after him. Striker makes the match for later.

Jey Uso vs. JTG

No Siva Tao which makes me sad. Basic back and forth start as Striker seems to agree with Bateman’s statement that all women are crazy. Josh: “You’re still single right?” Absolutely nothing to talk about in the first few minutes of this. JTG controls with his usual really basic stuff. He’s just not effective as a heel, mainly because he’s nothing special at all as far as a character or from a looks perspective. Jey comes back and hits a superkick for the pin at 3:34.

Rating: D. I love the Usos but man this storyline is dull. JTG is perhaps the least interesting character this side of Derrick Bateman on NXT. That’s the problem with this show. Ok one of many problems with this show: outside of the Usos and at times Titus, no one is anybody I have any interest in watching and rarely are their matches good. The guys that do regularly have good matches (Kidd, Tatsu, Barretta) are rarely on here. This match was boring though and JTG controlled all but like 15 seconds.

Earlier today in Striker’s office (he has an office???) Titus came in to apologize but the challenge to Young is still on. I don’t know why this segment existed.

Slammys recap eats up some time.

Bateman goes up to talk to Maxine and says that before the show is over, he’ll marry her. Curtis comes up after Bateman leaves and kisses her. She tries to slap him but says they’ll get physical after the match.

Percy Watson vs. Johnny Curtis

STRIKER STOLE MY BABY JOKE!!! He said we could have a baby by the end of the season. So Matt Striker thinks like me? I’m not sure I like that. Watson takes over to start and drops a leg for two. Curtis fights back with a single arm suplex for two. Curtis works on the arm a bit and then Percy hits a dropkick to break that up. There’s another and make it three. Jumping clothesline hits but he hurts his arm on it. Never mind though as he hits an overhead belly to belly release. Flipping splash gets two. Curtis gets up and hits a Falcon’s Arrow for the pin at 4:10.

Rating: D. This was another boring match, mainly due to Johnny Curtis being completely uninteresting. He’s done his same uninteresting thing for like a year now and once they got something different about him, the word play thing, they got rid of it as fast as they could so that they could make him as bland as possible again. That’s why I’m so bored by WWE heels anymore: as soon as they get something going, it must be killed before they get over at all.

Titus comes out for his showdown with Young. You know, their at least 8th fight this season. He’s in a suit for this one so maybe this isn’t a match? He apologizes to his sons for not being perfect and losing his cool last week. Young cuts him off, also in street clothes. Titus says he doesn’t have Young’s resume but he’s out here working every week.

Young says he’s just an ex-football player. Titus says this has nothing to do with that and runs down a list of a bunch of ex-football players, like DiBiase Senior, Ron Simmons or Rock. Titus says he’s going to leave and this is done. Young calls him a failure and shoves him. A brawl ends the show. Titus leaves him laying and isn’t happy about it.

Overall Rating: D+. Not one of their better episodes here as the whole thing was about Maxine and Bateman and Curtis and then the showdown was just a talking segment where Titus beats Young down. Hopefully this ends in a loser leaves NXT match and we actually get closer to ending this never ending show. This wasn’t their worst show ever, but it was really quite dull indeed.

Results
Trent Barretta/Yoshi Tatsu b. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks – Rollup to Hawkins
Jey Uso b. JTG – Superkick
Johnny Curtis b. Percy Watson – Falcon’s Arrow

 

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Tribute to the Troops 2011 – Not Too Bad

Tribute to the Troops 2011
Date: December 13, 2011
Location: Fort Bragg, North Carolina
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

This is the show that is now a tradition and is still pretty awesome. We’re still stateside for this and it’s probably a lot easier that way. The matches here don’t mean anything and that’s fine. This is about the people in the audience and that’s fine. This was taped Sunday night so don’t expect any references to last night. Let’s get to it.

We’re in an arena this year.

The President gives his usual message about this show.

Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett

Pretty big match to start things off with. Orton takes over to start and we get a Slammys reference. Maybe the commentary was recorded later? Barrett pounds him down to take over and a big boot puts Randy on the apron and gets two back in the ring. Pumphandle slam gets two. Barrett goes up and Orton gets in a set of punches and a superplex for two. Here’s the comeback and it starts with the powerslam. Elevated DDT is countered and they go to the outside. The DDT on the floor is countered and they brawl to a double countout at 5:57.

Rating: C-. I’m going to be a lot lighter on the ratings tonight because the winning and losing isn’t the point. This is about the fans having a good time and they couldn’t have one guy go over cleanly here. They didn’t have a lot of options so there’s nothing wrong with what they did here. Decent match too.

Barrett beats Orton up post match and loads up a table. Orton gets in a dropkick and sets up the table. Otunga of all people runs out for the save and he beats on Randy for a bit. There’s an RKO for him and he goes through the table via a big powerbomb.

Nicole Kidman loves the troops. My goodness she’s beautiful.

Jake Gyllenhall loves the troops.

Barrett says he has the psychological advantage over Orton. The only voice Orton will hear is a table breaking in half.

Nickelback performs Burn it the the Ground. Awesome song live.

A group of superstars jump out of a plane, which is what the specialty unit at Fort Bragg does.

Jack Swagger vs. Zack Ryder

Ryder brings out Sgt. Slaughter to counteract Ziggler. Ryder hits a middle rope dropkick for two. Swagger comes back with a powerslam for two but Zack pops off some punches. This isn’t going to last long. There’s the Broski Boot but the Rough Ryder is countered. Ryder is sent to the floor and Ziggler gets in a shot. Slaughter hits the Slaughter Cannon to put him over the announce table. Swagger beats down Sarge and steals the Ryder headband he was wearing. Back inside the Vader Bomb misses and the Rough Ryder ends this at 3:45.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but Slaughter being brought in was the right idea. He’s a character that it’s impossible to not like a little bit and for a patriotic show, you really can’t go wrong with him. This was short and there’s not much wrong with that. Although I’d question an AMERICAN character being a heel here.

Slaughter puts on the Cobra Clutch post match.

Hugh Jackman loves the troops.

The Bellas visit West Point.

Bella Twins/Natalya/Beth Phoenix vs. Eve Torres/Kelly Kelly/Alicia Fox/Maria Menounos

Maria is the host of I think Extra. She was a guest host of Raw a few years ago. Eve vs. a Bella starts us off but it’s off to Maria quickly. Off to Eve with the other Bella quickly and the standing moonsault gets two. Beth comes in but gets caught by an enziguri. Kelly comes in and everything breaks down with one from each side having the upper hand for about 3 seconds. Maria comes in against Beth and gets a pin off a sunset flip. This was what it was.

The Muppets love the troops and show more personality than other celebrities combined.

Celine Dion loves the troops.

George Wallace, a comedian, does a brief routine.

Video on Nash vs. HHH.

Booker joins in on commentary.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes

Bryan’s ribs are still taped. Rhodes goes straight for them, dropping the ribs onto the corner and taking over quickly. Off to a surfboard and Rhodes stomps him down in the corner. The commentary is all about Booker and Cole, which is a bit more understandable due to Booker facing Rhodes on Sunday. A clothesline puts Cody on the floor but Bryan jumps into a kick to the ribs. Booker checks on Bryan and pops Cody in the jaw, allowing Bryan to get a rollup in the ring for the pin at 4:35.

Rating: C-. Intense match while it lasted and it sets up Booker vs. Cody even better for Sunday. I’m actually looking forward to that match which really surprises me. I don’t think Booker will win the title but it should be an entertaining match at least as Booker is almost always watchable. This was just for the ending and that’s fine.

Booker beats on Cody a bit post match and there’s a Spinarooni

Carson Daly loves the troops.

Mary J. Blige performs.

Air Boom runs into Miss USA and does the Boom Boom Boom.

Robin Williams loves the troops.

The Dancing with the Stars winner, a veteran, says the troops are cool. He judges some of the wrestlers dancing. They’re videos of guys in the past and Eve gets the high score despite having nothing on Layla. Granted she didn’t have a video in this.

Hornswoggle does the announcing for this.

Air Boom vs. Primo/Epico

Rosa is with the non-champions and she’s still gorgeous. Kofi vs. Epico to get us started. Epico and Primo are real life cousins. Off to Bourne very quickly and he does his usual high flying stuff to fire the crowd up. Epico takes over and works on the back of Kofi but there’s a tag to Bourne who comes in with a rana. Everything breaks down and a Backstabber by Epico ends Bourne at 2:59. I guess there are your next champions.

Matthew McConaughey loves the troops.

Nickelback performs again. This time it’s a new song called When We Stand Together.

Christina Aguliera loves the troops.

Here’s Christian looking like he fell out of a building. He’s in agony but is here to celebrate the Canadian Army. Cue Sheamus to glare at him.

Sheamus vs. Drew McIntyre

Drew actually comes out second and gets a full entrance. Sheamus beats him up but can’t get the Celtic Cross. Drew gets in a few shots but Sheamus remembers he’s Sheamus and he’s fighting Drew McIntyre so he takes Drew down and a Brogue Kick ends this at 2:15.

Jimmy Fallon loves the troops.

Regis Philbin loves the troops.

Mary J. Blige performs again.

Bradley Cooper loves the troops.

Alberto Del Rio/The Miz/Mark Henry vs. John Cena/CM Punk/Big Show

Punk vs. Miz to start us off. Off to Cena who gets a bit reaction. He and Punk do some nice double team stuff and Punk messes up a bit and covers Miz at the same time Cena does. I think he legit forgot he wasn’t legal. Not a big deal but kind of funny. Off to Show who hits one of the hardest sounding chops I’ve ever heard. Del Rio comes in very slowly. Henry comes in about four seconds later and here’s the big showdown.

Henry gets the better of it and slams Show for two. The heels take turns beating on Show and Henry comes back in for a bearhug. Show fights out of it and hits a superkick. Double clothesline and both guys are down. Off to Miz vs. Punk with the champion taking over. Punk and Show do the Snuka/Andre move for the elbow to set up the Anaconda Vice but Del Rio comes in for the save.

Punk fights off Henry and here’s your real hot tag to Cena. He hits the suplex on Henry and I guess it must be the camo that makes no one able to see him. Everything breaks down and we get the usual ending to this show where all of the faces hit their finishers for the pin, with Cena hitting the AA on Henry to officially end it at 9:20.

Rating: C. This is the standard finish for this show and that’s just fine. This is about giving the troops something cool to end things and they did that just fine. Cena, the military themed guy, ending things with a huge power move is perfectly acceptable. This was about exactly what you would have expected and that’s all it needed to be. Fine ending.

Cena thanks the roster (which is all on the stage) and all of the troops for what they do. Nothing wrong with that.

Overall Rating: C+. I didn’t get into this one as much as I have in previous years. It just didn’t feel the same as it does when it’s outdoors. This felt more like a big commercial for TLC, which is understandable, but it didn’t quite click like most of the shows usually do. Still though, it’s fine for what it was and it’s not supposed to be anything serious. Not bad, but they’ve done it better.

Results
Randy Orton vs. Wade Barrett went to a double countout
Zack Ryder b. Jack Swagger – Rough Ryder
Maria Menounos/Eve Torres/Kelly Kelly/Alicia Fox b. Bella Twins/Natalya/Beth Phoenix – Sunset flip to Phoenix
Daniel Bryan b. Cody Rhodes – Rollup
Epico/Primo b. Air Boom – Backstabber to Bourne
Sheamus b. Drew McIntyre – Brogue Kick
John Cena/CM Punk/Big Show b. Alberto Del Rio/The Miz/Mark Henry – AA to Henry

 

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Kane’s Return with the Mask

What do you think about this?

 

I’m not sure how to take this yet.  Kane is one of my favorites, but I’m really not sure what the point is in having him (seemingly) come back as a heel.  It’s too early to tell obviously but this could be kind of stupid.  It gives Cena something else to do until probably the Rumble, but after that I’m not sure.

 

As for the mask…..why?  He had his greatest run without it and his second best run with the original.  This one now is like the one he had in 02-03, when he had his worst results (no world title).  Also, WE KNOW WHAT HE LOOKS LIKE.  There’s my mystery to it at this point.

 

As for the talk of Kane vs. Taker III at Mania…..no.  ANYTHING but that.

 

Your thoughts?




Monday Night Raw – December 12, 2011 – Gold Dudes and Men In Two Masks

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 12, 2011
Location: Norfolk Scope Arena, Norfolk, Virginia
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler

It’s the Slammys! I used to love these things when I was a kid and they were so campy and entertaining. Now they’re just kind of here and they’re usually a way to have some minor stories set up for the next few weeks/months. The main event tonight is Cena vs. Henry, which somehow is a pretty big showdown. It’s also the go home show for TLC, which is kind of a minor aspect given the three hour nature of this. Let’s get to it.

We open with a Slammy presentation. This is for the Tell Me I Did Not Just See That Moment of the Year. Booker presents it…along with Horny. Horny has an afro wig and keeps doing chest bumps with Booker.

The nominees are:

JR dancing
Santino almost winning the Royal Rumble
A fan throws water at R-Truth
Miz impersonates Rock

It’s JR dancing. I can live with that as that was pretty awesome. JR comes out…and here’s Cole to cut him off because that’s what Cole does. Cole says JR is fat and Booker calls him a loser. Strap in people: Cole vs. Booker can go on for HOURS. Booker says JR can beat Cole in a rap off. Cole’s is awful and I think everyone expected that. JR says he doesn’t need music. His actually has something resembling a rhythm to it and there’s music to it anyway. And then he stops rhyming all together. Guess who the fans say win. This very well may have been the worst opening in the history of professional wrestling.

Oh and JR does a Spinarooni. Ok more like he looks like he has a heart attack and convulses on the mat for a bit.

Here are Foley and Ted DiBiase Senior to present the Holy Censored Moment of the Year. This pairing is about as awesome as anything in the history of, ahem, Mankind. They try to figure out why they’re paired together. DiBiase says that he is an ordained minister. Foley: “So if that makes you the holy, then I guess that makes me the…..” DiBise: *EVIL LAUGH*

The nominees are:

Sheamus powerbombs Sin Cara through a ladder
The RKO to a leaping Christian onto the steps
The ring breaking
Evan Bourne’s shooting star off the ladder

Gee I wonder what’s going to win. If you can’t figure this out, you fail. Show comes out to accept and thanks the Sports Entertainment Academy of Arts and Sports. He thinks the World Heavyweight Championship would look good next to the Slammy. Nice little promo for the match on Sunday and for his match which is next.

Big Show vs. Wade Barrett

Barrett says what he’ll do to Orton at TLC will earn him that award Big Show just won. Then again that award is for something unexpected and everyone knows what he’s going to do to Orton. After a break we’re joined in progress with Barrett on the floor trying to get up. There’s a table set up at ringside now. There’s also a chair and a ladder. Barrett avoids going through the table and hits a big boot to put Show’s head on the table.

Show gets up as Barrett is ready to jump and then the bald man breaks the table. With Barrett on the apron on the outside, Show chops him in the chest and knocks him into the ring. Barrett goes to the floor and brings in a chair. Show knocks it out of his hands….and wins by DQ at 1:38? It’s going to be one of those nights isn’t it?

Of all people, the Road Dogg is doing this one. Yes, that Road Dogg. He’s in a DX shirt and is doing the Pipe Bomb of the year, which I think is the weird moment of the year.

There aren’t any real nominees but more along the lines of a bunch of R-Truth moments plus a hand full of others. This is just a big comedy montage for all intents and purposes, which is a great reminder of some stuff, namely Punk and Truth. The winner is…..CM Punk. Ok I can live with that.

Punk comes out with….a mannequin? It’s got a blonde wig and a t-shirt that says…..OH MY GOODNESS IT’S A DYNAMIC DUDES SHIRT!!!!! Punk says that he wants to talk about something tonight that is a special cause. This person works behind the scenes and is incredibly boring, just like this mannequin. Naturally it’s Johnny Ace and Punk has a tribute video. It’s set to a song that I’ve heard before but can’t place. We get Dynamic Dudes clips in there too which makes this worth a smile. After the video Punk is trying not to crack up. He accepts the award on Punk’s behalf and does a decent impression of him.

Lita is here to present the Divalicious Moment of the Year. Yep she’s still hot. I don’t think half the people know who she is.

The nominees are:

natalya putting the Sharpshooter on Eve and I think Alicia.
Kelly winning the Divas Title.
Kharma destroying Michelle.
Beth’s top rope Glam Slam to Eve.

Of course it goes to Kelly because she’s supposed to be some kind of female hero or something. Beth comes out to take the award from her and gets slapped.

Santino presents the OMG Moment of the Year. The Bellas are with him and they look good in those red dresses. After an argument over whether it’s o-m-g or OMG (pronounced like a word), here are the nominees.

HHH tombstones the Undertaker.
Rock Bottom to Cena at Mania.
The Walk Out.
Punk Leaves With The Title.

HHH wins. Are you freaking kidding me? He makes his big return with the hammer…and walks to the ring without his award. HHH says the real OMG moment was having Taker carried out for the first time in his career. He says the Undertaker is no more. HHH takes credit for ending the Streak. Are you kidding me? We get the video of Nash hitting him with the hammer a few months ago.

He says that maybe their 16 year relationship was based on lies and this Sunday all the lies and deceptions end. On Sunday he’ll show the world that he’s right and that Nash is simply done. Well he was done 13 years ago. Do we really need a match for that? HHH leaves and implies he’ll hit Santino with the hammer but lets him run instead.

Otunga and Tony Atlas are here for the Trending Superstar of the Year. Tony does the laugh as Otunga tries to be serious. The award goes to whichever superstar listed is trending on Twitter the fastest. Get this over with. They’ll be in a fatal fourway with the winner of the match meaning nothing but the first to be trending winning the Slammy.

Cody Rhodes vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Zack Ryder

Or is the winner of the match the winner of the award? Do they have any idea what’s going on here? Ryder and Bryan send the champs to the floor and hit stereo dives as we take a break. Back with Ryder and Bryan squaring off and they change the rules AGAIN, saying that it’s whoever trends first. THEN WHY HAVE THE MATCH??? Bryan and Ryder have a decent back and forth segment with them hitting cross bodies to put them both down.

Rhodes and Ziggler tease a staredown but think better of it so they can stomp the good guys. They get in a shoving match and Bryan tries to steal a pin. Rhodes and Bryan have a LONG pinfall reversal sequence but Bryan is sent to the floor. Ryder follows him and Ziggler tries to roll up Rhodes. Alabama Slam to Dolph gets two. They take a second break with Cody standing tall.

Back with Rhodes having Ryder in a Figure Four which doesn’t last long. Rhodes charges into some knees in the corner but Dolph breaks up the Broski Boot. Everyone is in the ring and everyone goes down. Beautiful Disaster hits Ziggler for two and Bryan goes off with the rapid fire kicks to Cody. Bryan goes up but gets crotched. Ziggler gets drilled by Ryder but stops Ryder as he goes up. Both heels hit superplexes and everyone is down again. Rough Ryder to Ziggler, Cross Rhodes to Ryder, LeBell Lock to Rhodes, Sleeper to Bryan, Zig Zag to Bryan and that gets the pin at 15:22.

Rating: B-. Fun match but as Lawler said, the match wasn’t important. What was important was trending on Twitter. That right there sums up almost everything that is wrong with Raw anymore. They’re so obsessed with getting people to notice them and accept them because they’re trending on Twitter 50 times a night and they have to tell us they’re trending on Twitter 50 times a night and it drives people crazy. And they wonder why no one buys their PPVs and why no one is watching their shows.

Ryder wins the award, because the match was pointless. He gets a Zig Zag for his efforts.

Christian returns to present Game Changer of the Year. He gives himself courageous moment of the year first of all. This is for one moment that changes everything. Here are the nominees.

HHH telling Vince and the pink jacket that he’s relieved of his duties.
Edge’s retirement speech.
Kevin Nash returns.
Rock and Cena making the main event of Mania a year early.

Cena and Rock win, as they probably should. Cena says he should only get half of the credit for this and introduces Rock. Oh wait this is a live show so he’s not here. “But he said he’d never leave!” We do have a satellite clip though. Oh wait no we don’t because he didn’t have time for that either. “This is worse than JR’s rap.” He apologizes for Team Bring It for not bringing it. However, this makes the award mean more because Rock is going to see this soon and hopefully it fires him up even more. This award is for changing the game for a year, but at Mania they change the game forever.

Alberto Del Rio/The Miz vs. CM Punk/Randy Orton

Punk vs. Miz starts us off. Off to Del Rio vs. Orton quickly and the Viper gets beaten down by both heels. We’re in standard tag formula mode quickly tonight. Punk gets a hot tag quickly and cleans house but the GTS is broken up, allowing Miz to guillotine Punk on the ropes as we take a break. Back with Punk backsliding Miz for two. Del Rio comes in and works over the arm a lot.

This is your usual main event style tag match: it’s the same formula with one guy getting beaten down for a long time until the other big face comes in off a hot tag and cleans house to set up the ending. The Finale and the GTS are countered but Punk’s kick to the head of Miz can’t get the tag. Barrett runs in through the crowd to take out Orton. Miz can’t hit the corner clothesline but he counters the GTS into the Finale for the clean pin on Punk at 12:42. Forget what I said about the formula I guess.

Rating: C-. The ending was a VERY nice surprise and it gives some heat to the main event on Sunday, which is certainly a good thing. Not a horrible match but Del Rio and Miz are pretty weak in the ring. Del Rio is boring all around but that goes without saying. It helped to push the title match though so that made it a lot better.

Miz and Del Rio beat up Punk post match and he gets put in the armbreaker using the ladder.

Vickie presents A-Lister of the Year. And here’s Goldust to present with her. He says she wears more makeup than she does.

The nominees are:

The Muppets
Hugh Jackman
Snooki
Cee-Lo Green

And it goes to Snooki because the WWE is stupid. She gives a pre-recorded message.

Mark Henry says he’ll do more to Big Show Sunday than he has already.

Here’s Sheamus but he’s interrupted by Jinder Mahal. Ok then. He rambles for awhile and gets his head kicked off. That’s it. There’s a referee there but there was no bell and no cover or anything.

Rey Mysterio comes out to present Superstar of the Year. The nominees are:

Orton
Miz
Henry
Punk
Del Rio
Cena

Ace comes out and accepts for him because he’s banged up.

Second Coming video. The word control flashes on the screen to end this.

We hear a story about a soldier in Afghanistan that hugged Vince when she saw him and opened her phone to show him her son with a WWE Title belt. Her son and husband are in the front row. That’s cool.

Mark Henry vs. John Cena

This is due to Cena costing Henry a win last week over Ryder. The bell rang at 1055 so this isn’t going to last long. We go to a break less than a minute in. Back with Henry in control,. Cena tries a slam but falls backwards. Off to a neck vice but Cena suplexes his way out of it. He hits the Shuffle but collapses on an AA attempt which gets two for Mark. Henry calls Cena Mr. USA I think.

Cena avoids a powerslam and hammers away but the shoulders don’t put Henry down. Instead Cena jumps into a bearhug and he’s in trouble. He escapes for a few seconds and hits the Slam but falls down afterwards. Then some fire goes off and KANE is back. He has a modified version of the old music and looks like he’s wearing a metal mask. He chokeslams Cena and I guess it’s thrown out at we’ll say 9 minutes. The mask looks ridiculous, but he takes it off post chokeslam to reveal a more traditional one. There’s Cena’s match for Sunday I guess.

Rating: D+. Nothing to see here but the end was the whole point of it. Kane was someone that needed to return, if nothing else to give Cena something to do on Sunday. The mask being back….why? His video has the shot of him not in a mask, but he’s wearing one here. I don’t get it, but that sums up most of WWE at this point for me.

Overall Rating: D+. This show didn’t do it for me. I mean it really didn’t do it for me. The awards were pretty weak and while there were a few nice surprises, they didn’t really help get the show going, at least not for me. It wasn’t bad and I’ve definitely seen worse stuff, but this didn’t do much. The crowd didn’t care but I think that’s due to the nature of the show more than anything else. Too much talking too and not a good show overall, but it had its spots. Nice surprise at the end too.

Results
Big Show b. Wade Barrett via DQ when Barrett used a chair
Dolph Ziggler b. Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes and Zach Ryder – Zig Zag to Bryan
The Miz/Alberto Del Rio b. Randy Orton/CM Punk – Skull Crushing Finale to Punk
John Cena vs. Mark Henry went to a no contest when Kane interfered

Here’s TLC if you’re interested:

 




Best of the WWF Volume 7 – Put Hogan vs. Savage on Last and This is a Classic

Best of the WWF Volume 7
Host: Gene Okerlund
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura, Vince McMahon

We’re back to this again and this is the second time I’ve had to do the first half because I screwed something up and I’m an idiot. Anyway this is from mid 86 which isn’t a good time for the WWF other than this new guy named Savage who is kind of awesome. Other than that there isn’t much to it. Let’s get to it.

Dig that Coliseum Video opening! And yes I know I say that every time but it’s still awesome.

Gene welcomes us to the tape and runs down the card.

Pedro Morales vs. Terry Funk

We’re in Boston here in I’d guess early 86. Gene tells us about Morales holding what we would now call the Triple Crown. Morales is at the end of his career here but he was still big enough of a draw to be brought into the big New England crowds. Morales hammers away and Funk is all messed up early on. Then again he might just be Terry Funk. Funk comes back in and throws Pedro onto the announce table.

Morales may have injured a hamstring on the fall. Funk hammers him in the head and does a little Ali Shuffle. He keeps peppering Morales and they go out onto the table again. Funk actually pulls the headset off of Gorilla who implies a showdown later on. That could actually be worth seeing. Or maybe that was Jimmy Hart. Pedro goes shoulder first into the post and this has been totally one sided so far.

Funk pulls some tape out of his tights and chokes away. Morales gets it though and here comes the firey Latin temper that he was famous for. He knocks Terry around as Jimmy is freaking out on the floor. Funk gets knocked to the floor and the steps get turned over. He goes head first into them and hides under them like a true cowardly heel. Pedro teases jumping off the top but settles for drilling Funk upside the head. Funk does a perfect Flair Flop off the apron to the floor.

I don’t think I’ve seen anything other than punches in this match so far and that’s made it awesome. Funk is all over the place, looking either drunk or old. In other words, he’s perfectly fine. Back to the floor again and Terry finds a wooden chair under the ring but it doesn’t get used. Instead Pedro punches him some more and kicks him in the back. Funk gets his trunks pulled down and that’s an image I really didn’t need to see twice in one night. Jimmy slips Funk the Megaphone and a shot to the head ends this.

Rating: B-. This was a great old school brawl from two great old school brawlers. Funny how something like that works isn’t it? Pedro was more or less done after this and it’s not like Funk ever did much in his run in the WWF. At least after this he went back to the NWA where he was much more successful.

WWF World Title: Hulk Hogan vs. Randy Savage

This was the hottest feud on the planet back then and Savage jumps him as soon as Hogan hits the ring. He destroys Hogan for about three minutes with the robe and shades still on. And that is why Randy Savage is better than you: he can make a robe, sunglasses and purple underwear look awesome. A bunch of belt shots, including one off the top are all cool with the referee.

Liz gets on the apron for dramatic convenience and Hogan takes over with his big rights. Now he has the shades on and he chokes away with the headband. We head to the floor and Savage goes into the post, busting him open badly. Hulk peppers him with some shots to the open cut. What a strategic American hero.

We get our first non-punch move of the match: a choke by Hogan. The fans are WAY into this as Liz gets up on the apron again. Savage gets a shot in and sends Hogan to the floor. There’s the double axe to the outside and another one on the inside for two. Savage goes up and there’s the big elbow, but Hogan does the superhero kickout at one. It’s Hulk Up time and I think you know where this is going.

Hogan goes off on him and there is blood everywhere. There’s the big boot and Savage keeps trying to run. Back to the floor and Hogan sets to ram him into the post but Liz stops him. Savage gets down and rams Hogan into the post. We have a bell for some reason and I guess we’re done? There are spots of blood on Hogan’s trunks.

Rating: B. This is one of those matches where there wasn’t any kind of a story to it and it was just a big brawl from bell to bell. Due to that, the fans LOVED this and never stopped freaking out the entire time. These two did this same match almost every night on the house shows and it never stopped working. Once they teamed up in 88 they were almost unstoppable and it’s why the matches they had after they Exploded were so awesome.

Post match Hogan goes nuts, throwing on a bear hug. It takes a bunch of the roster to break it up. It’s cool to see that from Hogan (who is getting cheered harder than almost anyone else I’ve ever heard in the Garden) who rarely shows much anger. It’s a countout win for Savage if you’re interested, which was Hogan’s second straight loss to Savage in MSG. There’s huge heat on Savage being announced as the winner.

Lou Albano vs. Arnold Skaaland

This is a battle of the managers from 77, which I believe was a HUGE feud if I remember right. They’re both old but the fans are all over this. Skaaland drills him after the bell and Albano almost immediately runs. I think I’ve seen this before. I mean before I erased the review earlier tonight. Albano goes old school on the heel style with a foreign object that isn’t really there. Do that about four or five times and you’re going to need a police escort out of the place, at least back in the day.

The beating goes on for awhile and it’s more or less all Albano just popping him in the head with the object. Seriously that’s all the match is but if I know my MSG crowds, the pop for the comeback is going to be oh yeah there it is. Skaaland gets the object and drills Albano with it a few times to blow the roof off the place. Albano bails and it’s a countout win for Arnold.

Rating: B-. I know that’s way too high for four and a half minutes of nothing but punches, but dang the fans ate this up. They’re two old managers but that’s all this needed to be: a beating by Albano and then a big comeback win for Skaaland, which is all the fans wanted to see. This is a walking definition of less being more.

Tag Titles: Toru Tanaka/Mr. Fuji vs. Haystacks Calhoun/Tony Garea

The non-Japanese guys are champions here. This is a rematch from when the country boy and Garea, the guy from New Zealand won the titles earlier in the year. It’s also 2/3 falls. Calhoun is about 600lbs and was the biggest guy in the company’s history until some French giant arrived. Tanaka throws the salt that is always thrown by Japanese guys for some reason and some little old ladies keep sweeping it up. Ok then.

We’re almost immediately clipped to Garea and Tanaka starting us off. Garea hooks a headlock and is really bland looking while doing so. Calhoun is really happy and jolly. He’s a hillbilly character the size of Yokozuna if that gives you a visual. He comes in too celebrate because his partner hooks a chinlock. See what I’m dealing with here? The heels cheat to take over and it’s off to Fuji. It’s so weird to see him in shape.

Garea fights back, hitting what Tito Santana used called a head knocker. Clipped again to Garea backdropping Tanaka and it’s off to the fat man. He does a few comedy spots but also some simple ones like sitting on Tanaka’s chest instead of dropping onto him. The second time he does it, Garea stands on Haystacks’ back. Calhoun takes some salt to the eye but he gets out easily. A few shoulders get two on Tanaka. And there’s a spin kick to the stomach for the first fall for Tanaka.

Clipped to the start of the second fall with Tony pounding away on Tanaka some more. He hooks a front facelock which is ruled a choke in a rare thing to see for a face’s move. We get the most obvious clipping I’ve ever seen as all of a sudden Fuji is in the hold instead of Tanaka. I know they’re sneaky but come on now. Everything breaks down and the heels double team Calhoun enough for a DQ to tie things up.

Third fall begins with Calhoun all messed up but that’s normal for him as he was always kind of played up as a simpleton. Garea starts of course and Tanaka wants a handshake. They do some lame brawling and Garea hammers away even more. Off to the country boy again and the big splash keeps the titles on Calhoun and Garea.

Rating: D+. This was really pretty boring. I’ve seen some old school matches that are good but this was nothing to see at all. Calhoun was a big old school draw but he didn’t do much for me. The match was nothing to see and was mainly Garea doing the whole thing and boring me to death the entire time. The Japanese team would get the titles back later in the year.

Calhoun splashes Tanaka again because he can.

This next one is from Showdown at Shea so it’s pasting time. Monsoon does commentary on the tape but I’m not watching this again.

Intercontinental Title: Ken Patera vs. Tony Atlas

This is pre-jail for Patera so he’s blonde and still kind of awesome. Atlas is Mr. USA and a generic strongman. Surprisingly good reaction for Atlas. This sums up Patera very well: before Mark Henry, there was Ken Patera. Just with a lower level of suck that is. Atlas is RIPPED with a body that makes John Cena look like Yokozuna. He throws Patera through the ropes on a kickout. Keep in mind Patera weighs about 270.

Foley goes into this insane story about how he remembers the Atlas/Johnson title win and how a strange set of circumstances that night led to him being world champion. Cole is ON IT tonight, talking about how the guys are doing everything in much more dramatic fashion because there’s no video or anything like that so the view you have from the stands is all you have. That’s something I wouldn’t have thought of but it’s very true.

We then get something I’d bet you will hear on a maximum of three other WWE produced shows ever: Foley says a lot of the matches aren’t that good. How many times can you remember someone that flat out saying a show has been bad for the most part? Vince would call the worst matches ever “extraordinary” or something like that while Foley is sitting here saying this show hasn’t been very good. He’s absolutely right which is very nice to hear for a change, especially from someone that knows what it’s like to be out there.

Full nelson goes on but Atlas gets the ropes. The announcers don’t talk about the matches at all and are just telling stories about how their memories of these guys which is really fun to hear. It’s nice to hear guys that love this stuff just sit around and talk about wrestling rather than put things over. We get an interesting issue as the fans chant USA for Mr. USA Tony Atlas. Keep in mind Patera was a legitimate Olympian.

Cross body gets two for Atlas as Cole runs down the history of Shea Stadium. We hit the floor for some brawling and Patera is in trouble. This is a big brawl for the most part and we get a bell as Patera stays outside too long. Foley calls the finish unsatisfying. Atlas gets on the mic and wants more but the champion runs.

Rating: C-. Not very good but fun. Power vs. power is easy to do and this worked fine. Both guys oversold everything which is the idea here and it worked rather well. Not great or anything but fun which is what the idea is supposed to be here. Atlas was pretty decent actually.

Now we get to one of the theme parts of the tape: The Slammies! This was for the original broadcast, which is so far beyond campy it reaches the city again. Gene goes up to some fans and annoys them. All he does is ask who is winning tonight, without asking about categories or nominees. This goes on way too long and he doesn’t seem to stop asking decent looking women. One guy wisely walks away from him. I really hope these guys are plants. This is in Baltimore. The only interesting thing here: Gene says the words jabrino and kayfabe. This goes on WAY too long.

Jesse talks to Piper while Piper is in the bathroom.

Now we get to the main part of the awards. Vince and Gorilla are hosting and Gorilla has to zip up. The first award is for Most Ignominious and it was voted up by the WWF Academy of Arts and Sciences. The winner (and only nominee) is Nikolai Volkoff. Sheik and Volkoff (in wrestling gear and a cheap suit respectively) come out to accept the award but Sheik falls on his face. Volkoff thinks it’s a singing award. He doesn’t know what ignominious means and when he finds out he isn’t pleased. Nikolai says he shouldn’t be the Most Ignominious. He should be the SECOND Most Ignominious.

Roddy Piper wins the award for best performance in the Land of 1000 Dances video. He has what appears to be a broom with him for some reason. The trophy breaks as soon as he picks it up. He says that’s typical of MTV: Music to Vomit by. Oh that Roddy. He’s so crazy. Like MTV has anything to do with music.

Hart Foundation vs. British Bulldogs

If this isn’t awesome, they’re having an off night. Bret and Dynamite start us off and things are in high gear already. Bret bails and we’re clipped. YOU AIR TEN MINUTES OF GENE ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS AND YOU CLIP THIS??? Bret gets sent outside again and it’s off to Davey. It’s power vs. power now as Anvil comes in. They trade slams and Davey does it with just one arm. Show-off.

Davey makes Anvil look stupid (a far stretch to be sure) and it’s off to Bret. The Harts take over on Davey and work him over in their corner. This is Foundation 101 and to be fair it’s 80s tagging 101. They’re in the black and blue which I always like a little better than the pink. Smith gets the tag to Dynamite but Bret pops him in the back as he’s hitting the ropes. Now the REAL beating begins. Anvil sends him to the floor where Bret slams him on the concrete.

The heels do some old school cheating like switching without tagging and other such nefarious means. Dynamite takes the Bret chest first to the buckle bump. The Harts work over the ribs and back for the most part. There’s some heel miscommunication as Bret holds Dynamite’s arms back but Anvil has a boot up in the corner to ram Dynamite’s head into. You don’t often see that from the Harts.

Davey finally freaks out and chases Bret around the ring which just allows choking by Anvil. They continue the tag cheating ways by having Dynamite make the tag but Bret distracts to keep the tag from counting. I love stuff like that. Dynamite tries to spin out of a backbreaker like a tilt-a-whirl but I think they botch it to a degree. Backslide gets two for the Kid.

Dynamite gets tied up in the ropes but escapes just in time to avoid a flying Hitman who crashes into the ropes. Hot tag FINALLY brings in Davey to clean house. There’s the press slam to Bret. The numbers catch up with him and he takes a Hart Attack. Bret covers him, only to have Dynamite fly off the top with a swan dive (he was Benoit’s idol) and makes the illegal pin.

Rating: B. Oh come on it’s the Bulldogs vs. the Harts. This would be good if none of them had any limbs on their bodies. This is probably the best pairing of any WWF teams in this era, and when you consider how totally stacked the division was in this era, I can’t really think of any higher praise.

Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Moon Dogs

The lighting is horrible here so I’m assuming this is in a non-American city. I’m right as it’s from an unnamed city in Australia. The Rougeaus are brand new here. This incarnation of the Moon Dogs are Rex and Spot, probably the most successful pair. The Rougeaus take turns beating up on Rex, who is returning it seems. The brothers aren’t even in matching tights so this must be very early in their run in the company. Further research says this is their first month there.

Spot comes in but the beard doesn’t work its usual magic as he’s rolled up for two. We’re in Sydney if you’re particularly interested. According to Hayes this is the Rougeaus’ debut. The newcomers work over Spot but we’re clipped to him holding Raymond in a bearhug. Hot tag brings in Jacques who cleans house and hits a cross body for the pin on Rex.

Rating: C-. Pretty much a nothing tag match here but that wasn’t the point. This was the team’s debut and they needed a win over an established team to get anywhere. Also it’s just a house show match for a country that didn’t get much mainstream wrestling, so it’s not like this was supposed to be anything of note.

Dream Team vs. Iron Sheik vs. Nikolai Volkoff

Both teams here have lost the tag titles at Mania so they have that in common. Also this is the rare heel vs. heel pairing. This might be in Philly but I’m not 100% sure. Oh ok this is before Mania 2 so the Dream Team (Beefcake/Valentine) are the champions. Off to Beefcake who gets caught in the other evil corner. Nikolai hammers away on him and wins a brief power struggle.

I think the champs are the de facto faces here. Valentine has a little bit better luck against the Russian so it’s off to Sheik. He hooks an abdominal stretch and Gorilla still finds something to complain about with it. The Sheik goes aerial with a dropkick of all things and gets two. Brutus gets the tag and this match is boring me to death. The not yet Barber misses a middle rope fist to Volkoff and it’s time for a bearhug to waste more time. Camel Clutch by Sheik is broken up and Valentine comes in, as does everyone else. And there’s the lame double DQ. At least it’s over.

Rating: D-. This was one of the lamest matches I’ve seen in years. Just boring all around and the whole thing didn’t work at all. The Dream Team was straight up boring but would be together until Mania 3 because the fans hadn’t suffered enough I guess. Just a horrible match and terribly boring.

Overall Rating: B-. The last match really drains this because aside from that, I really didn’t have anything to complain about. Everything works really well and you get an hour and a half of great stuff until the last match on the tape just kills this thing deader than Coliseum Video. If they had put Hogan vs. Savage on last, this goes WAY up in value. Still good stuff though, which is rare in this series.

 

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Smackdown – December 9, 2011 – Off A Step Tonight

Smackdown
Date: December 9, 2011
Location: Jacksonville Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Michael Cole, Josh Matthews

We’re back to Fridays again after what I thought was a very good holiday show. It seems I was in the minority on that but that tends to be the case most of the time with this show. It should be another decent one as we close in on both TLC as well as the end of the year. I don’t remember any matches being announced but that’s not to abnormal. Let’s get to it.

We open with Booker T down near the entrance. Cody Rhodes is standing near him and we get a clip from before the show went on the air of Booker getting beaten down by Cody. I guess we’ll be having a two man commentary team tonight.

Lillian Garcia is back and I think I’d rather look at her than Chimmel. Cody cuts her off and says no one cares that she’s back and no one noticed that she left. It matches the departure of one Booker T. He hopes that he made his message clear tonight. Cody is going to take Booker’s place tonight (Cody: “Who else is going to talk about a Fave Five with eleven people in it?”).

There are tables, ladders and chairs all around ringside. I mean in addition to the usual chairs that are around ringside in the audience that is.

Tonight there’s going to be a Beat the Clock Challenge between Barrett and Orton. The idea is both of them will have a match and both will be timed. Whoever wins their match in the fastest time will get to pick the kind of match they have at TLC: tables, ladders or chairs.

Wade Barrett vs. Ezekiel Jackson

If Jackson wins here then all Orton has to do is win his match later. He takes over to start as Cody talks about how awesome he is. Barrett hits a front legged chopblock and sends Jackson shoulder first into the post. His hair is all wild again so you know he means business. Cole and Cody suck each other off a bit as Barrett takes over with his usual stuff like the pumphandle.

We take a break and come back with Barrett holding a chinlock. It’s nice having that clock there to keep time for me. Jackson breaks the hold and fires back with clotheslines in the corner and Barrett is covering up. Here come the slams but Barrett escapes the Rack. Wasteland can’t hit but the Bossman Slam ends this at 7:53. That was refreshing to see: a secondary move ending a match.

Rating: C-. Not a great match or anything but I almost always enjoy Barrett’s in ring work. He uses some stuff that isn’t very common but it’s nothing that makes him look too over the top. More people could easily do this and I have no idea why they don’t. Jackson is a guy I don’t see being around that often as he’s pretty just just a jobber to the stars anymore, which is about where you would expect him.

Barrett says Orton is the only thing standing in his way of the world title, and that doesn’t mean anything as he’s inside Orton’s head as opposed to Orton being in everyone else’s head. The voice in Barrett’s head is saying Orton is out of time.

Show vs. Henry is officially a chairs match, which is the only match that really makes sense for them.

Otunga complains about being in the street fight last week because he’s part of the Raw roster. Otunga tells Teddy that the loss should be expunged from his record. Teddy agrees but says that Otunga is subject to the whim of the authority figure. Since Otunga is here tonight, he’s going to compete against someone Teddy has been looking for an opponent for: Sheamus.

Josh is in the ring and brings out Daniel Bryan. His ribs are taped up due to the cage match last week. He says he’s very sore but what hurt worse was the disappointment of letting everyone down. Everything he had ever wanted was right in front of him and he let it slip away. Cole cuts him off as he starts to tell a story about his dad and goes on a rant about how Bryan never earned anything. Bryan points at Cody and says he made him tap to earn his shot. Cole says Bryan should go away so here comes Bryan after Cole. Cody blasts Bryan and referees break it up. Cole working with Cody? I’m not sure how I feel about that.

After a break, Cody vs. Bryan is announced for later.

Zack Ryder vs. Heath Slater

Remember the bad reaction Ryder got Monday? It’s made up for here. No entrance for Slater. Ok so a lot of that is canned but there was definitely a reaction for him. Slater takes him down for a few seconds but the Broski Boot and Rough Ryder end this at 1:25.

Ted DiBiase vs. Jinder Mahal

Thank goodness this isn’t on PPV. Cole freaks out over the DiBiase Posse thing. Mahal dominates to start and there’s no Cody anymore on commentary which I forgot to mention. You can always tell when the crowd doesn’t care because you can hear the referee talking. The jingoistic fans chant USA while Cole doesn’t want to talk because he’s mad at Matthews for some reason or another. Mahal hits some jumping knees to the face and then gets rolled up for the pin at 2:54. This was REALLY bad.

We get a clip from some music awards where Big Show chokeslammed country singer Trace Adkins through a table.

After a break Big Show is in the ring. He talks about how nine years ago, he beat Brock Lesnar in Madison Square Garden for the WWE Title. People said that was impossible but he did it. He thinks nine years is long enough time for him to do the impossible again and beat Mark Henry for the title. With all the chairs they’ll have around the ring and the people in there, the physics say it has to get mean and nasty. At TLC, the Hall of Pain gets closed.

Here’s Henry who says he’s half hurt. His ankle is still hurt but he didn’t tape it so he’s not looking for a fight. He yells at a fan to shut up so the fans chant at him to shut up. Henry wants to say something to Show’s face but wants a promise that Show won’t put his hands on him. Show thinks about it really hard and says no. Henry seems to be trying to get out of the match by saying that it won’t mean anything if Show beats an injured man. He asks for the courtesy of Show not putting his hands on him if he gets in. Show finally relents and Henry gets in.

Henry gets in and says he’s the champion. In two weeks at TLC he should be 100%. Then why did he bring up the beating an injured man thing earlier? Henry says people will talk about this fight for decades. Mark asks to let bygones be bygones and may the best man win. He extends his hand which Show shakes reluctantly. Henry goes to leave but stops. He says Show thinks he’s (Show) a monster. Show just thinks it, but Henry really is and the fight is on. Show drops an elbow on the leg and Henry bails so Show goes after him. He gets a chair and cracks Henry in the back and leg with it.

Sheamus vs. David Otunga

Hornswoggle is the guest ring announcer. Josh asks a great question: if Otunga is so smart, why does he keep coming here and talking himself into situations he can’t get out of? I love stupid heels. Otunga is officially Johnny Ace’s assistant. Otunga tries to take him down early and Sheamus is like “no boyo.” He powers David around and hits the ten forearms to the chest. Otunga gets in the required jobber offense and Sheamus does the freaky eyed smile. Powerslam and Brogue Kick end this at 2:57. Just a squash.

Horny and Sheamus celebrate and we cut to the Second Coming video.

Daniel Bryan vs. Cody Rhodes

The video is ignored again. Bryan fires off kicks to start but Cody breaks it up with an elbow to the ribs. A release gordbuster gets two. Why is it so hard for people to focus on an injured body part? If you were in a real fight and you saw someone with a bunch of bandages around a body part, where would you aim? Cole goes on another rant and again it makes me roll my eyes.

Bryan gets knocked to the floor into the barricade as we take a break. Back with Cody holding Bryan in an abdominal stretch. Cody starts ripping the tape off and Cole talks about fearing for his personal safety earlier. Bryan sends him to the floor and tries the suicide dive, which really is just him shoving Cody out of the way. Bryan crashes into the barricade again with much more impact than Cody’s landing had. Cole, correctly this time, calls Rhodes an idiot.

Rhodes gets back in but Bryan is getting fired up on the floor. Here come the kicks. Why would you get on your knees in a match with Daniel Bryan? It’s just not going to end well for you no matter what you do. A running dropkick in the corner sets up a top rope splash attempt but Rhodes moves, sending the bad ribs into the mat again. And here’s Booker for the DQ at 5:56 shown of 9:26.

Rating: C. This was getting good by the end and I wanted to see where it was going. The ending makes sense but it’s kind of a disappointment. However, it was the right way to go as Bryan is getting pushed hard now and you don’t want the IC Champion to lose either, so having it go this way is the right call. Decent match, disappointing (though understandable) ending.

Booker gets the better of the brawl and Cody runs.

Aksana and Teddy are in the back when Cody interferes. He wants a match with Booker so Teddy makes it for TLC for the title. It’s about time he defended the thing. Aksana stares at Cody as he leaves.

Orton says if you want to know his thoughts, ask Barrett. He’s thinking that Barrett did Ziggler (Orton’s opponent tonight) a favor because Orton won’t be able to make the suffering last as long as he usually does. He says he has Barrett exactly where he wants him.

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

This is strange. I read the spoilers for this show and there was a Divas tag taped for it and there’s no sign of it anywhere here. The show is about as long as it usually is and there’s nothing to indicate that anything is missing. I had heard that the Australian broadcast of the show had the post match angle of it cut but the entire match is missing here. Strange indeed. Then again they’re the Divas so who cares?

Randy Orton vs. Dolph Ziggler

Orton has to win in under 7:53. No Swagger with Dolph here. Orton hits a pair of dropkicks and gets three near falls in the first thirty seconds. Dolph stomps away in the corner but Randy stops him cold, hitting the knee drop for two. Six minutes left. Ziggler kicks him in the knee and hits a Fameasser for two. Off to something like a cobra clutch with five minutes left.

A DDT gets two as Dolph is going slowly here, which is perfectly fine for the thinking of this match. Back to a chinlock with four minutes to go. Neckbreaker for two and the clock is running down. Ziggler takes forever getting up top and is crotched with three minutes left. A big superplex by Orton gets two. With a little over two minutes to go Orton starts his finishing sequence.

Two minutes left and Orton hits the backbreaker. Ziggler tries to run but gets caught in the Elevated DDT for two with 70 seconds left. Dolph rolls to the floor and Barrett slips behind Orton and sends him into the post with about 40 seconds left. Orton is outside with 15 seconds to go. And the RKO hits for the pin at 7:51 and two seconds left.

Rating: C-. Really didn’t like this one because of the time thing. It hurts a lot when you know the match isn’t going to break eight minutes and we’re all just waiting on the RKO to hit with about 8 seconds left. It’s not horrible but when you get used to these two stealing the show, this is really pretty disappointing by comparison.

Post match Barrett beats Orton down some more and says he has a suggestion for the match. He sets up Wasteland through a table but Orton escapes. Barrett runs and Orton makes it a table match. Ziggler goes through it instead.

Overall Rating: C. I really wasn’t feeling this one tonight. A lot got added to the PPV but it felt like they were doing this blindfolded. I can’t put my finger on it but things felt like they were off by a step all night. It’s not a bad show, but this is definitely one of their weaker entries in a very long time. Like I said though, a lot was added to the PPV and that’s what counts. I just wish getting there had been a little better.

Results
Wade Barrett b. Ezekiel Jackson – Bossman Slam
Zack Ryder b. Heath Slater – Rough Ryder
Ted DiBiase b. Jinder Mahal – Small Package
Sheamus b. David Otunga – Brogue Kick
Cody Rhodes b. Daniel Bryan via disqualification when Booker T interfered
Randy Orton b. Dolph Ziggler – RKO

 

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I Want To Talk A Little Bit About Rock vs. Cena’s Buildup

I’m a huge Star Wars fan. I love the characters, I love the stories, I love the themes, I love everything about it. When I was a kid I went to my uncle’s house one day and he was watching Empire Strikes Back. This was my first introduction to the series and I was immediately wanting more. It turned out that the reason the movie was on TV that day was because the films were being re-released into theaters. I was very lucky because the first time I saw the original three movies was on the big screen.

Then a few years passed and I heard about the Star Wars prequels. These would be three movies set before the original trilogy that told how we reached the events of the first three movies. My friends that were Star Wars fans were so excited they could barely contain themselves. My immediate reaction: why would I want to see a bunch of movies when I already know what happens after them?

That’s the problem I have with any prequel movie: we know that Anakin Skywalker goes to the Dark Side and becomes Darth Vader. We know that he’s the father of Luke and Leia. We know that Yoda goes into hiding. We know that eventually Vader turns back to good. In other words, we know the endings, so why in the world am I supposed to get interested in what else happens? At the end of the third prequel there’s a huge duel between Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin. I know neither of them is going to die, because they’re in the next movies. Yeah the scene is really cool and it’s a great fight, but I’m not going to be on the edge of my seat, because I know no one dies.

Now what does this have to do with John Cena vs. The Rock at Wrestlemania 28? The answer is simple: why should I care about what happens to John Cena from the night the match is made until the bell rings at Wrestlemania 28? His ending is already set in stone. We know where his road leads and no matter what happens to him, he’s going to be in the main event in Miami on April 1, 2012. Why should I as a fan care about all these lesser matches and feuds that he’s in?

Now don’t get me wrong: his feud with Punk was very entertaining and I got into it big time. But at the end of the day, it’s really just giving Cena stuff to fill his time for the next year. This matches his matches really uninteresting unless you get something special like his feud with Punk. Cena could lose every match he’s in and he’s still going to be in the main event. There’s no way that’s going to change barring Cena having every bone ripped out of his body, burning the flesh and muscle that remains, and feeding the charred pieces to a little boy in Idaho.

There are other ramifications to this as well and we’ll start with CM Punk. Ignoring the fact that ratings haven’t done jack with Punk on top (it’s reality. Get over it internet fanboys), what incentive does Punk have to work hard this year? He’s not going to be in the main event of Wrestlemania, which is the point of any wrestler lacing up a pair of boots. There’s no point to having a big angle wasted on him, because he’s going to be playing probably fourth fiddle to Rock, Taker, and whatever Orton is doing. Want proof this is reality?

Back in the 80s and 90s WCW held their TV tapings about three months in advance. You would have shows taped passed the next PPV in the can on a regular basis. There were at least two instances that I know of where a title change was already booked before the champions that were taped losing the titles won them in the first place. Let’s say you’re one of those teams. What incentive is there for you to put on good matches and work on your craft if you’re destined to lose the titles on so and so date no matter what happens?

Another possible outcome of doing things this far in advance: what if something major happens that you have no control over? Again, look to the WCW tapings. The main event of Starrcade 93 was to be Sid vs. Vader for the title with Sid winning the belt. They taped weeks of stuff in advance of Sid with the title (yes they gave away the ending to the biggest show of the year months in advance. And people wonder why they went out of business), but a funny thing happened on the way to Charlotte: Sid never won the title.

Instead he took a pair of scissors and stabbed Arn Anderson with them, getting himself fired and basically thrown out of any major company for about two and a half years. That’s why Flair was thrown into the main event at the last minute. All of the material shot with Sid as champion was officially worthless so they had to just throw it away and start over, eating all of the costs. See how this could become a problem?

Imagine if the unthinkable happens and Cena or Rock is injured. After we pull Vince off every rooftop in the country, they would have to call in order, Austin, Shawn and HHH to come in and fill in the spot. All of those would be huge, but they wouldn’t be in the same league as Rock vs. Cena. That match has been built up for over a year by the time Mania rolls around and while it would be big, it would feel like a letdown. That brings me to my next point: guys like Austin.

People keep wanting to see Austin have one more match and they want it to be at Mania 28 against Punk or whomever. People that say this can keep dreaming, because there’s no way that he’s going to have his one last (yeah right) match on the same night that Rock makes his big epic return to face the biggest star of this generation in a showdown almost 15 months in the making. Austin is a smart man, and he’s too smart to try something like that.

The same goes for HHH. Do you think he’s going to have a big marquee match at Mania? Do you think it was a coincidence that he was gone for almost the entire build to Survivor Series? HHH is still viewed as a special attraction and he’s not going to go out there and waste one of the handful of big matches he has left when Rock is going to get 10,000% of the attention? Again, HHH is a smart man and he’s too smart to try something like that.

In summation, I’d think it was a bad idea to build up Rock vs. Cena for a year in advance. It’s going to draw a hue buyrate for Mania, but it would have done that anyway. It’s not like Rock has been around every week for the buildup or anything like that, so I really think that all the negatives I listed above outweigh the good things that a build like this brings with it.

 

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NXT – December 7, 2011 – Bateman’s Face Turn?

NXT
Date: December 7, 2011
Location: Jacksonville Memorial Coliseum, Jacksonville, Florida
Commentators: Matt Striker, Josh Matthews

Into December we go with more NXT nonsense. After last week’s shocking, yes SHOCKING I say, ending with Maxine leaving with Johnny Curtis, I think we have a theme for the week. Hopefully we get more Usos and less Bateman this time as I can only take so much of that curly haired lunkhead. Let’s get to it.

The Usos open us up with the Siva Tao. That would be so awesome at a high school football game. They’re here for a match but first do the “We say Us, you say O” deal with the audience and again it gets a solid response. However before we get to the popular tag team that puts on good matches, here’s Bateman to talk about Maxine. The Usos say Tamina lied last week and Bateman runs off.

Usos vs. Tyler Reks/Curt Hawkins

Hawkins vs. Jimmy to start us off and we’re told that Striker and Hawkins are from the same neighborhood. Off to Reks and he has about as much success as Hawkins. We’re told that the Usos both played college football at the University of Hawaii. Stereo clotheslines put the non-relatives on the floor. Reks takes over on I think Jey and knocks him to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Hawkins grabbing a chinlock. Jey fights off as Josh makes fun of Matt’s commentary. A spinning forearm takes down Curt and it’s off to Jimmy. The momentum shifts (or the pendulum has swung for you Monsoon enthusiasts) and Jimmy takes over on Reks. The Umaga corner shot gets two. Reks hits a clothesline and puts on a Torture Rack, but Jimmy comes out with a bulldog for two. The Usos beat down both guys with kicks and a top rope splash pins Reks at 8:35.

Rating: B-. I liked this and if it had a few more minutes it could have been something really good. The Usos are just so far and away better than anyone else in the tag ranks right now and they’re better than most of them on the main shows too. I have no idea why they’re stuck on NXT but that’s WWE for you: keep popular teams away because WWE hasn’t decided we should cheer for them yet.

Bateman is looking for Maxine and runs into Maxine’s mom. She flirts with him and Curtis comes up. Mama Maxine slaps Bateman and implies that he started it. She leaves and Curtis said he didn’t try anything with Maxine. He was with Bateman’s mom last week though. That makes Bateman yell and charge like an idiot but he gets stopped before the beatdown. Does ANYONE care about Derrick Bateman? Seriously?

Tyler Reks/Percy Watson vs. JTG/Darren Young

My goodness this looks boring. Watson vs. JTG to get us going as Striker makes jokes about Maxine’s mama, whose name is “first name” Portia Perez. Now they’re stealing SHIMMER names. Watson and JTG exchange some basic stuff and it’s off to Young, who hits a belly to back suplex on the apron. Back to Jimmy the Gimmick who grabs an odd neckbreaker for two.

JTG slaps on a seated abdominal stretch for awhile and then it’s a chinlock. What a variety. Watson fires off a dropkick to a jumping JTG and Titus finally gets into this after about five and a half minutes. He beats up both guys and hits a shoulderbreaker for two on Young. Tamina gets on the apron as a distraction and Young gets a rollup pin at 6:40. That ending came out of nowhere and was pretty bad.

Rating: D+. Total polar opposite of the opening match with there being nothing interesting here at all. Titus is being wasted in this tag team. They could easily just put him into a Goldberg style character but instead we have to have Darren Young out there to bore everyone out of their minds. I do not get this show at all.

Titus is upset about the loss and talks about the show running for 39 weeks. He said Young doesn’t care about the people and gets booed for it. Titus is booed for it I mean. He issues a challenge for next week against Young, saying it’s about being a man, not Redemption. Here’s the problem: as it stands, there’s nothing on the line about this match/fight. If one of them wins so what? If the other one of them wins so what? That’s the problem with this show.

Video on the WWE Network. I need to look into getting that.

Derrick Bateman vs. Johnny Curtis

We have about 9 minutes for this show. We could be in trouble here people. There’s no Maxine in sight. Bateman is all mad so he gets clotheslined down quickly. Bateman hammers him down in the corner and might be bleeding from the nose a bit. They go to the floor and Bateman misses a dropkick off the apron. He’s holding his arm and I think I heard someone say they were getting the doctor. They go to a break so maybe there’s something to that.

Back with Curtis working on the arm and we’re told that the medics were out checking on Bateman during the break. That’s probably due to the bloody nose though. Curtis works on the arm even more and shouts that he loves all the fans. Bateman fights back and allegedly it’s him showing fire. By fire, they mean a clothesline and a backslide. The fans are openly booing now. Thankfully they pick up on it and Bateman hits his awful falling bulldog for the pin at 7:13.

Rating: D-. Oh just no. I have no idea if this was supposed to be a face turn for Bateman or what, but it didn’t work at all here. The people just do not care at all about these two and their love triangle or whatever shape it is. This was an awful match because the wrestling was horrible and the angle sucked. Turning Bateman face would help him tremendously, but he’ll need more than that.

Maxine comes out post match and yells, asking how he could do that with her mother. The engagement is off. Now the face stuff makes more sense.

Overall Rating: C. This show started off pretty good but the love triangle thing just sucked the life out of it. Bateman turning face out of it is a good thing, but they couldn’t find anyone less dull than Johnny Curtis? That’s a running problem in WWE at the moment: heels suck. Other than on Smackdown where you have Barrett and Henry (who is rapidly losing steam), most of the heels are just dull. Oh and Ziggler is good. Other than that, there’s not much and it’s showing badly. Better show than usual, but nothing to write about.

Results
Usos b. Curt Hawkins/Tyler Reks – Top rope splash to Reks
JTG/Darren Young b. Percy Watson/Titus O’Neil – Rollup to O’Neil
Derrick Bateman b. Johnny Curtis – Falling Bulldog

 

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