ECW On Sci Fi
Date: September 4, 2007
Location: US Bank Arena, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

It’s time for a big showdown as CM Punk is getting his latest title shot against John Morrison for the ECW World Title. This almost has to be the title change, because there is no reason for Punk to lose again. Throw in the fact that there really isn’t anyone else for Morrison to defend against and they almost have to pull the trigger here. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look at CM Punk becoming #1 contender last week.

Opening sequence.

Boogeyman vs. Matt Striker

Big Daddy V is here with Striker, who describes him as omnipotent. Boogeyman is foaming at the mouth to start so V gets on the apron for a quick distraction. Striker bails to the floor, comes back, and gets knocked right back to the floor. Back in and Boogeyman hits a corner splash before giving chase on the floor….where V clotheslines Boogeyman for the fast DQ.

Post match V crushes Boogeyman to leave him laying.

Armando Estrada tells CM Punk that this is his last chance for the ECW World Title. Estrada says good luck, but Punk says that’s for losers.

We see a clip of Balls Mahoney on Who Wants To Be A Superhero. Of course this is missing from the Peacock version.

Balls Mahoney vs. Miz

Extreme Expose is here with Miz but Kelly Kelly doesn’t seem thrilled with everything. Mahoney starts fast with the left hands in the corner but Miz takes him down, earning some applause from Extreme Expose (Kelly again isn’t impressed). Miz grabs the cravate but Mahoney is right back up with the snap jabs (Kelly approves). Not that it matters as Miz hits the Reality Check for the fast pin.

Post match Miz declares Mahoney the loser of the match so Kelly checks on him. That earns her a stern lecture and she leaves with Miz and the girls.

John Morrison is sick of CM Punk because he is a loser. Punk picks his tattoos out of a coloring books and looks like a Blink 182 groupie who cried himself to sleep when he couldn’t sneak backstage.

Long video on the McMahon Family drama this week on Raw. Next week, Vince’s illegitimate son is revealed.

Kevin Thorn/Elijah Burke vs. Stevie Richards/Tommy Dreamer

Thorn pounds Richards into the corner to start but Richards kicks his way to freedom. It’s off to Dreamer, who gets slammed down to put him in trouble for a change. Burke comes in and, after a cheap shot from Thorn, hits an STO to put Dreamer down again. Thorn pulls Dreamer into a chinlock which doesn’t last very long as Dreamer sends him into a turnbuckle. The hot tag brings in Richards to take over on Burke as the pace picks up. Burke sends him shoulder first into the corner though, leaving Thorn and Dreamer to fight to the floor. The Elijah Express finishes for Burke.

Rating: C-. It was nice to have a flashback to the New Breed vs. ECW Originals feud here and right now, that might not be the worst way to go. At the end of the day, there isn’t much going on with the rest of the roster so this is about as good of an idea as they have with these people. Not a good match, but it was passable enough that it could have worked with a few more minutes.

Video on CM Punk vs. John Morrison.

ECW World Title: CM Punk vs. John Morrison

Punk is challenging in his final shot. They go technical to start with an exchange of front facelocks and rollups for two each. Punk gets a delayed one off a hip toss of all things but Morrison takes him down and stomps away as we hear a bit about the history of the ECW World Title.

A springboard dropkick gets two on Morrison and Punk starts kicking him in the chest. Morrison sends him throat first into the ropes though and Punk is sent to the apron. That means the powerbomb to the floor has to be blocked, leaving Punk to dive onto Morrison as we take a break.

Back with Morrison slamming Punk off the top for two and then blasting him with a kick to the face. We hit the chinlock for a few seconds before Morrison goes with a running knee to the face for two. Now it’s a reverse chinlock (with Punk looking like he is tapping, likely by accident) before Morrison goes up top. You don’t do that in a match this big, as Punk is right there with a superplex to bring him back down.

Punk’s leg lariat gets two and the running knee in the corner/bulldog gets the same. Back up and Morrison catches him with a Pele kick in the corner but has to elbow his way out of the GTS. A rollup with trunks and rope gets caught (thank goodness) so Punk rolls him up for two of his own. Morrison misses the springboard kick to the face though and it’s the GTS to give Punk the pin and the title.

Rating: B. They had built this up so hard that it had to be the title change and they did just that. Punk kept getting closer and closer to the win and FINALLY pulled it off, which is all you could ask for. They even had some hot near falls near the end, but this was either Punk wins the title or goes into another feud that they don’t have here at the moment. Good match and the only decision they could have made.

Punk celebrates to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Not a great show here but the main event is the only thing that matters. While that is kind of a microcosm of all of ECW at the moment, I’ll take what I can get with the title change though, as that is all that it needed to be here. ECW needs some fresh stars, but at least they have Punk to fight some of their current roster for a few weeks/months now. Good main event and the rest was passable enough, even if it isn’t that inspiring.

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Smackdown
Date: February 11, 2022
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Corey Graves, Michael Cole

We have less than ten days before Elimination Chamber and the only big thing on the Smackdown side is Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns. That might not sound too appealing, but that’s what the people paying for Elimination Chamber want to see. Other than that, we have the fallout from Ronda Rousey destroying Sonya Deville and choosing to face Charlotte at Wrestlemania. Let’s get to it.

Here is Smackdown if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Ronda Rousey picking Charlotte for Wrestlemania and also taking out Sonya Deville for a bonus.

Here is Sonya Deville, with her arm in a sling, to say she is tired of people disrespecting her. There will be consequences for the actions of people like Ronda Rousey and Naomi. Therefore, she has requested that Rousey be fined $100,000 and suspended indefinitely. Cue Adam Pearce to say Vince McMahon has responded to her request via email.

Said email says that Vince doesn’t like someone abusing their authority, so not only is the request denied, but if Sonya gets involved in Naomi vs. Charlotte, her job will be….IN SERIOUS JEOPARDY. Cue Naomi to say that Sonya can’t touch her, but Naomi can do this. A loud slap drops Sonya, who is not happy.

Here’s what’s coming tonight.

We look back at Kofi Kingston/Big E. taking out Los Lotharios in a pretty good match last week.

Big E./Kofi Kingston vs. Los Lotharios

After a quick chat in the back about how great Los Lotharios are and the Los Lotharios Kiss Cam, we’re ready to go. Big E. cranks on a headlock to Angel before Kofi comes in with a splash for two. It’s off to Angel, who takes Kofi into the corner for some crossface shots to the jaw. Humberto adds some forearms to the back but Kingston sweeps his leg out. That’s enough to set up Big E.’s apron splash and there’s the big dive to take Los Lotharios out at the same time.

We come back from a break with Angel pounding on Big E. and TAKING OFF HIS (own) PANTS. Big E. gets up and brings in Kofi as everything breaks down. A top rope double stomp/powerbomb combination gets two on Humberto with Angel making the save. Angel hits a Backstabber and sends Big E. outside for a moonsault (with his leg smacking Big E. in the head). Another moonsault press gives Humberto two on Kofi but he’s back up with Trouble in Paradise. Kofi tries a tornado DDT out of the corner but Garza slips off and stacks Kofi up for the clean pin at 10:24.

Rating: B-. Remember last week when New Day beat Los Lotharios? Well this is the same thing but the opposite, because WWE loves doing this kind of thing. The good thing is that the match worked a little better than their usual efforts, as WWE has a bad tendency to run nothing matches back in a trilogy for some weird reason. Odds are this gets a third try, as the tag division continues to spin its wheels.

The Usos jump the Viking Raiders and leave them laying.

We look back at Goldberg returning and challenging Roman Reigns for Elimination Chamber.

We get a sitdown interview with Roman Reigns and Paul Heyman. Neither of them seem overly worried about Goldberg, with Reigns saying that if he was in WCW when Goldberg had his winning streak, WCW would still be in business. After a clip of Goldberg squashing Brock Lesnar at Survivor Series 2016, Reigns laughs them off as old news. Reigns doesn’t think much of the idea that he and Goldberg were supposed to fight two years ago at Wrestlemania. He wants to slap Goldberg in the face and get him out of here again. Preach it brother.

Recap of Aliyah vs. Natalya, with Aliyah beating her three times in a row.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Pinfall or submission only. Natalya shoulders her down to start and they dive over each other a few times. A Michinoku Driver gives Natalya two but Aliyah is back with a Thesz press. Natalya shrugs that off and puts on the Sharpshooter, sending Aliyah to the ropes. That has no impact though as there are no disqualifications, meaning Aliyah has to tap at 2:40. So Aliyah beat her and beat her and beat her and then lost. Got it.

Post match Natalya stays on her but Xia Li runs in for the save.

We get a Rock narrated video on Rocky Johnson for Black History Month.

It’s time for InZayn, but first we see Johnny Knoxville wrecking a bunch of Sami Zayn merchandise earlier today. Sami says he’s on to bigger things like getting his Intercontinental Title back, which doesn’t go over so well with the crowd. The booing doesn’t work on a podcast so Zayn promises then vegan creole recipes for later. That brings out his guests, Rick Boogs and Shinsuke Nakamura, with Sami promising to take the title last week.

Nakamura asks if Sami saw the movie, meaning Jackass Defeated, which comes out next week. Sami doesn’t think much of Boogs, who can lift all the weights he wants. Boogs reaches for the microphone….and gets electrocuted, sending him down into the corner. Nakamura goes to check on him and gets jumped by Sami, who leaves them both laying. After that live electrocution, we’re ready to move on.

We look back at Drew McIntyre taking out Madcap Moss last week.

Madcap Moss, with a black eye, says he can’t be in Happy Corbin’s corner this week.

Happy Corbin vs. Cesaro

Corbin takes him into the corner to start and starts the pounding. Deep Six cuts off the Cesaro comeback but he sends Corbin into the corner as well. That means the slide under the ropes but they fight to the floor, with Cesaro hitting a running uppercut. Back in and Cesaro hits the springboard corkscrew uppercut for two but Corbin grabs the End of Days at 3:58.

Rating: C. This was a match where they didn’t have a chance to do much and Cesaro was there to make Corbin look good. You need to keep Corbin strong for the Wrestlemania match with Drew McIntyre, because that’s what we’ll be seeing for some reason. Corbin is better without Madcap Moss, but egads I could go for something other than Corbin for McIntyre.

We go to Madcap Moss getting his eye looked at when Drew McIntyre comes in. He knows Moss’ eye is ok, which is why their match at Elimination Chamber is now Falls Count Anywhere.

Charlotte is ready to retain the Women’s Title.

We get a sitdown interview with Goldberg and Michael Cole, who Goldberg says he loves like a brother. Goldberg promises that this is a comeback that will bring back the old him. It’s two years in the making, ten years in the making or fifteen years in the making. Reigns has promised to “Goldberg Goldberg”, but Goldberg promises to make Reigns acknowledge him.

Here’s the opening segment again.

Sheamus was the honorary starter at a NASCAR race.

Smackdown Women’s Title: Charlotte vs. Naomi

Naomi is challenging and Sonya Deville can’t get involved. Charlotte runs her over to start but Naomi is back up with a whip into the corner. An enziguri sends Charlotte outside and there’s a slingshot corkscrew dive to send us to a break. Back with Naomi in trouble but managing to catch her with a high crossbody for two. The Figure Four necklock is broken up so Charlotte chops away instead. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gives Charlotte two more and she bends Naomi’s back around the post.

Back in and Naomi manages some kicks to the head, setting up a Blockbuster for two more. They head outside with Charlotte sending her into the steps for a crash as we take another break. Back again with Naomi fighting out of a chinlock and hitting another springboard spinning kick to the face. A bulldog drives Charlotte face first into the middle turnbuckle but Charlotte plants her with a powerbomb for two of her own.

The double moonsault hits raised knees though and Naomi hits the Rear View for a very close two. Naomi loads up the split legged moonsault but hits raised knees as well to give Charlotte two more. A (not great) rollup gives Naomi another near fall and she plants Charlotte with a headscissors driver. Now the split legged moonsault connects for two, as the fans are WAY into these near falls. Some forearms have Charlotte in trouble and a kick to the head staggers her again. Another Rear View misses though and the Natural Selection retains the title at 19:50.

Rating: B. This took some time to get going but they were rolling by the end, especially after the second break. They had some great near falls with Naomi getting so close to the title before falling short. One of the good things about Charlotte losing her title over and over is that there is a chance she could lose the title here and then get it back to set up the Wrestlemania title match all over again. Heck of a match here and worth a look.

Post match Sonya Deville is here to go after Naomi, with Charlotte coming back in to kick Naomi in the face. The beatdown is on until Ronda Rousey runs in for the save.

Overall Rating: B. They had some good stuff here, with the wrestling being solid for the most part, including a pretty awesome main event. The setback here was the focus on Goldberg vs. Roman Reigns, which isn’t exactly enthralling. At least they kept the Goldberg segment short, because talking really isn’t his thing. The main event really pulled this up, though the bad things kept the show from hitting that much higher level.

Results
Los Lotharios b. Kofi Kingston/Big E. – Rollup to Kingston
Natalya b. Aliyah – Sharpshooter
Happy Corbin b. Cesaro – End of Days
Charlotte b. Naomi – Natural Selection

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205 Live
Date: February 4, 2022
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Sudu Shah, Nigel McGuinness

It isn’t saying much when the biggest moment on a show is the introduction of a new announcer but that is about all we got last week. So far it seems that the idea of dropping the 205 Live name is already over, which shouldn’t be that big of a surprise. Odds are most important people in WWE have not thought of this show in a long time, so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Bodhi Hayward vs. Brooks Jensen

Andre Chase and Josh Briggs are here too. Feeling out process to start with the fans very behind Bodhi. A wristlock doesn’t get Jensen very far so he takes Hayward down and puts a knee on his head. Back up and Bodhi grabs a hiptoss, setting up the up/down splashes. Jensen goes right back to the arm and the chinlock goes on. That’s broken up (twice) and Nigel is way behind Bodhi. Some three point charges take Jensen down again but a third is cut off by a knee to the face to give Jensen the pin at 6:04.

Rating: C-. Every time I see Chase and Hayward, I am more and more amazed by the fact that they are making this work. It’s a goofy gimmick with little future but they put everything into it to make the thing work. Briggs and Jensen have fallen a decent way and that’s not good for their future, but there is always a place for some big cowboys on a WWE show.

Kacy Catanzaro/Kayden Carter vs. Fallon Henley/Lash Legend

Brooks and Jensen are here to watch Catanzaro and Carter. Legend is the only one here who doesn’t like to dance. Carter takes Henley down to start and walks over her back, much to the fans’ delight. It’s off to Catanzaro, who gets launched for a seated senton on Henley for an early near fall. Legend comes in and throws Catanzaro down, which leaves Catanzaro smiling a bit.

A gorilla press doesn’t work so it’s Carter coming in to help with some double teaming. That doesn’t work either as Legend sends Carter into the corner for a hard chop and a tag to Henley. For some reason Legend is right back in for a powerslam before Henley adds an X Factor for two. Carter gets over to the corner without much trouble and the hot tag brings Catanzaro back in. Everything breaks down and the 450/neckbreaker combination finishes Legend at 6:13.

Rating: C. It’s kind of amazing how much easier Legend is to watch without her doing the most annoying talk show in recorded history. She has the size and athleticism to be something around here, but this is the highest level she should be at right now. Henley could have something, but putting her in a team where Legend is going to overshadow her isn’t the best way to see what she can do.

Kushida vs. Damon Kemp

Kemp wrestles him down with no trouble to start and mocks Kushida’s time obsession. Kushida dropkicks the arm but the much bigger Kemp shoves him away without much trouble. An overhead belly to belly sends Kushida flying (Shah: “There you see that Pedigree.”) but Kushida scores with the handspring elbow. Kemp shrugs him off and tries a fireman’s carry, only to get reversed into a cross armbreaker for the tap at 3:50.

Rating: C. You can absolutely see that they want Kemp to be something and he seems to have the skills to do so. The amateur abilities will always work and this felt like he got caught instead of defeated. Kushida gave him about as much as he could in a less than four minute loss and it felt like the biggest thing on the show by a few miles.

Overall Rating: C. This was a better showing than most weeks around here as the main event was good and the other two matches showcased some people well enough. The show still has very little reason to exist other than to warm up the NXT crowd, but I still wonder how much WWE expects these wrestlers to get out of a match that lasts around five minutes. Either way, the main event wasn’t too bad and I’ll take that over most weeks.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: September 3, 2007
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re actually taped this week as WWE is on its way to an international tour next week. Unforgiven is coming up later this month and we need a card, but there are going to be a few people missing. Late last week, a group of wrestlers were suspended for thirty days over connections with Signature Pharmacy, which had been linked to performance enhancing drugs.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

As a result, after this week, Charlie Haas, Edge, Gregory Helms, John Morrison, William Regal, Ken Kennedy, Umaga, Sho Funaki, Chris Masters, and Chavo Guerrero Jr. are going to be gone until next month. Booker T. was so adamant that he didn’t do anything that he gave notice and is gone. Eugene is gone as well, after not having a prescription for painkillers. In an unrelated note, Cryme Tyme is gone as well, albeit over issues with Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch and yelling at a referee. Things could be rather different for the next few weeks so let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Randy Orton attacking a variety of people, including John Cena’s dad to end last week’s show. In case it wasn’t clear in the first place, of course you know this means war.

Opening sequence.

Intercontinental Title: Jeff Hardy vs. Umaga

Umaga is defending and punches Hardy down to start fast. A kick to the face and a headbutt both drop Hardy again and there’s a chest first whip into the corner. Umaga superkicks him off the apron and we take a break. Back with Umaga grabbing the nerve hold and then nailing a Samoan drop.

The middle rope headbutt misses though and Hardy gets a much needed breather. Hardy forearms away and gets two off a baseball slide dropkick. The Whisper in the Wind gets two but Umaga is back with the swinging Rock Bottom for two of his own. Umaga goes up top but Hardy crotches him down….and gets the very fast pin for the title. Even Hardy is stunned as Umaga kicks him off and out to the floor.

Rating: C. Most of this match was a house show fight until the shock ending. They did a good job of making this feel like a squash until the underdog won off a fluke, giving it almost a Bret Hart vs. Yokozuna Wrestlemania X vibe. Umaga feels like he got caught slipping on a banana peel instead of taking a defeat, which lets him come back as a monster in a month. Hardy getting the title is always a fine way to go though and this was about as logical of a way out as they had.

Post match, Umaga breaks a lot of stuff.

Vince McMahon has a bunch of attorneys with him to deal with his families’ attorneys. Carlito, with a slightly less stupid looking (though still stupid looking) haircut, comes in and gets his singles match with HHH turned into a handicap match with Umaga on his side.

Maria is a bit worried about her match with Beth Phoenix, as set up by Santino Marella. Santino tells her not to worry, because he has something to get off his chest. Oh and he’ll protect her too. Maria doesn’t seem convinced.

William Regal tells a production assistant to send John Cena to him when Cena arrives. Melina pops up and whispers something to Regal about her, ahem, meeting with Vince McMahon. Regal calls her kinky and says she should be ashamed of herself. Stephanie and Linda McMahon show up to glare at Melina. Linda gets in a slap in slow motion and here is Ron Simmons for the catchphrase.

Maria vs. Beth Phoenix

Hold on though as first, Santino Marella says that he is going to beat up Ron Simmons as soon as his arm is better. He also calls the city a disgusting dump, but here is Sandman to interrupt. Santino says Sandman is jealous because Santino gets to make love to Maria, while Sandman only has his stick. Sandman canes him in the head and they go up the ramp, leaving Maria alone. This is completely edited off Peacock for whatever reason. As for the match, Beth throws Maria around with no trouble and finishes with a cradle suplex in less than a minute.

Post match, Beth says she is getting her Women’s Title shot at Unforgiven. Candice Michelle has never seen anything like her before and she beats up Maria again for a preview. Cue Candice for the save.

We see the aftermath of Randy Orton attacking John Cena’s father, including a nasty black eye.

Here is William Regal to recap Randy Orton attacking John Cena’s last week. As a result, Regal has given Orton the night off, but Orton is here via satellite. Orton makes it clear: Cena did this to himself and his father’s blood is on his hands. All Cena had to do was give Orton his rematch for the WWE Title, so does Cena want it now? Want it or not, Regal makes the match for Unforgiven.

Orton hopes Cena’s dad never forgives his son but here is Cena to no music. Cena comes to the ring and promptly beats the daylights out of Regal, including knocking him over the announcers’ table and putting him in the STFU. Referees finally make a late save but Regal is done.

Paul London/Brian Kendrick vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

The winners get a Tag Team Title shot against Lance Cade/Trevor Murdoch, on commentary, at Unforgiven. Kendrick and Haas start things off with Kendrick being in trouble on the technical side. A wristlock works a bit better and it’s London coming in to stay on Haas’ arm. Benjamin comes in for a gorilla press gutbuster to take over on London though and we hit the neck crank. Back up and London rams heads with Haas, allowing the crawling tag over to Kendrick. The fans get into things as Kendrick hits back to back dives on Haas and Benjamin. With Benjamin and London on the floor, Sliced Bread gives Kendrick the fast pin.

Rating: C+. London and Kendrick are valuable people to have on the roster as they can have a good match with anyone while getting the fans behind them. That should set them up as good #1 contenders and the match should be good enough. Haas and Benjamin continue to be fine opponents for anyone, as the tag division is starting to grow again. That being said, I do wonder if London and Kendrick were supposed to be Cryme Tyme.

Post match Cade and Murdoch get in the ring for what seems like some false sportsmanship.

William Regal is in an ambulance as Shane McMahon walks by.

Video on CM Punk, who is challenging for the ECW World Title tomorrow night.

Carlito tries to fire up Umaga by telling him that HHH was laughing at him for losing the Intercontinental Title.

Vince McMahon meets with his lawyers and asks about his money being secure. After seemingly making Coach GM in place of the injured William Regal, Vince fires a lawyer for suggesting he use a defensive strategy.

Here are Jillian Hall and Daivari, with the former saying she isn’t supposed to sing due having her wisdom teeth cut out but she’ll do it anyway! We get some Summer Lovin before it’s time for a tag match. This is also missing from Peacock.

Cody Rhodes/Mickie James vs. Daivari/Jillian Hall

The women start things off, with Jillian telling Mickie to avoid the teeth. Instead Mickie kicks her in the ribs and then in the face so it’s off to the men. Cody armdrags Daivari down into a few armbars but has to fight out of a chinlock. Daivari drops some elbows for two instead and the chinlock goes right back on. That’s broken up as well so Cody puts on a spinning toehold. Jillian tries a save but Mickie cuts her off, leaving Cody to hit a DDT for the pin.

Rating: C-. As has been the case since Cody’s push began, it isn’t about the match itself but rather Cody getting to establish himself. The good thing is that they have mixed it up a little bit, as he may be beating Daivari over and over, at least they are having it in different forms. It isn’t a huge push, but they’re going about it in a smart way.

Carlito/Umaga vs. HHH

Carlito throws the lefts at HHH to start but gets punched down for his efforts. HHH throws him down by the hair and then goes for Umaga but Carlito comes back in. Some double teaming is enough for the quick DQ.

Post match the big beatdown is on but Carlito grabs a chair, which HHH takes away and wrecks both of them (including several shots to Umaga’s head). The sledgehammer is brought in and HHH blasts Umaga in the head to bust him open. A big sledgehammer shot to the back of the head knocks Umaga cold and I’d assume it’ll take about thirty days for him to recover.

Unforgiven rundown.

Here are Vince McMahon and his attorneys to deal with the rest of the family. Vince knows this whole thing is about the money and everyone here wants a handout. Cue Linda McMahon, sans attorneys, to say she is the CEO of WWE so she has her own money. Thanks to Coach bringing all of those women out here to explain that Vince has had so many affairs, she can take him for everything he has. Vince tries to calm things down but here is Stephanie McMahon to interrupt.

Vince knows she’s the volatile one but they’ve had some great times together. He has a video for her looking at A Father’s Love (this could go so many different ways from Vince), which is him pummeling Linda and Stephanie over the years. Vince panics because it’s the wrong video, but HHH pops up on screen. HHH swears he had NOTHING to do with that. HHH: “Hi Steph.” That gets a smile from Stephanie, who thinks Vince should step down from his position as Chairman of the Board.

Now it’s Shane McMahon coming out to ask if he’s talking to Vince McMahon his father, or an arm swinging, death faking, egomaniacal lunatic. Shane thinks Vince needs to change in some way because this could all work out. Shane: “I always wanted a brother!” That gets a glare from Stephanie, but Vince says he never had any affairs. He was saying all of those things to make himself feel better and he only cheated on Linda ONE TIME. That was the woman who gave birth to the illegitimate son and Vince feels terrible about it. He gets on his knee to apologize but here is Mr. Kennedy to interrupt.

Kennedy says there are a lot of coincidences between himself and Vince and it just so happens that the son will be revealed next week in his hometown of Green Bay, Wisconsin. Kennedy flat out says he is Vince’s son, which Stephanie doesn’t buy. Hold on though, as Kennedy credits Vince for turning him into a WWE Superstar and then says his name loudly, with the MCMAHON at the end.

Vince hugs him, but here is a guy in a suit to say that he represents the mother of Vince’s illegitimate son. It is NOT Mr. Kennedy (darn that stupid pharmacy), but he does have a clue as to the son’s identity: Things Are Looking Up. Vince wants to know what that means to end the show.

Overall Rating: D+. This was a really weird show as the biggest issue came from having to deal with having to wrap up so many people all at once. The Kennedy deal was the big one, as not only is he gone, but now he has lost the spot in what was probably the biggest angle of his career. The rest of the show wasn’t very good either, but I would wonder how many things had to be changed late because of all of the suspensions. Not a good show, though there were some rather unique circumstances.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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NXT
Date: February 8, 2022
Location: Capitol Wrestling Center, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Vic Joseph, Wade Barrett

We are a week away from Vengeance Day but there is another title match to get through first. This week will see Mandy Rose defending the Women’s Title against Kay Lee Ray in a match that seems likely to have some shenanigans. Other than that, we continue the men’s Dusty Classic while trying to find a field for the women’s version. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap

The opening video features Mandy Rose talking about all of her success and demands to be taken serious.

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Semifinals: Grizzled Young veterans vs. Creed Brothers

The Creeds break up the Veterans’ trash talking entrance and start the fight fast. That means Gibson gets beaten down inside as the brothers get to take turns on him. Brutus suplexes Julius onto Gibson but a cheap shot allows the tag to Drake. Julius runs Drake over without much trouble and isn’t fooled as Gibson comes in off a blind tag. Some alternating Creed knees to Gibson’s ribs set up a gutwrench suplex so Drake tags himself back in.

The Veterans get in a double team on Brutus on the floor though and it’s a catapult to send him throat first into the ring structure. Back in and the chinlock stays on the throat but Brutus manages to muscle Gibson up for a suplex. Drake cuts off the hot tag attempt with a sleeper though and Brutus is cut off again. That’s broken up though and the hot tag brings in Julius to power Drake around.

A suplex gets him out of a front facelock and everything breaks down. Drake hits a heck of a suicide dive to take out Julius on the floor, setting up a Doomsday Device for two back inside. It’s back to Brutus to clean house with the power but more double teaming takes him down. What looks like a 450 is loaded up but Julius runs in to run the ropes and superplex Drake for a huge crash. The basement lariat finishes Gibson at 12:03.

Rating: B. There was a story here with the Veterans having experience but being taken down by the power and ability. The fans were WAY into the Creeds and that is something that has been lacking from this version of NXT. This was a high intensity match though and the Creeds finally getting their shot at Imperium (assuming we don’t get a surprise) sounds good.

We look at Raquel Gonzalez beating Cora Jade and Gonzalez agreeing to team with her.

Jade is happy but Yulisa Leon/Valentina Feroz come in to mock her in Spanish. Gonzalez pops in to out-insult them. Leon and Feroz leave, with Gonzalez saying only she can call Jade that. Jade: “Wait, what did they call me?”

Last week, Wendy Choo and Amari Miller stole Tiffany Stratton’s credit card.

This week, Choo and Miller celebrate credit card fraud/theft/whatever illegal activity that was.

Wendy Choo vs. Tiffany Stratton

Choo works on the arm to start and frustrates Stratton by dodging some kicks. A one footed dropkick sends Stratton into the corner, setting up a running elbow (with Choo putting her hands under her head like she’s asleep). Now it’s a chinlock with a similar motion but Stratton (who seems to have broken a nail) fights up. Choo gets knocked into the corner and kicked down, setting up a corkscrew Vader Bomb to finish Choo at 3:01.

Rating: C-. There might be some hope here, as while Stratton isn’t much of an original idea, she’s a lot better than Oops I Feel Asleep. The credit card story is stupid but this should be the end of it, at least for now. They need some new stars in the women’s division and Stratton could be a little something if she is given the chance.

Draco Anthony is disappointed with his lost but Joe Gacy and Harland come in for a pep talk.

Pete Dunne is ready to crush Tony D’Angelo in a cage next week. Anthony comes in to offer him good luck before their match tonight but Dunne would rather snap his fingers.

Draco Anthony vs. Pete Dunne

Joined in progress with Anthony hitting a suplex but Dunne goes for the singers to cut that off. More finger twisting ensues, followed by a Kimura that is broken up pretty quickly. A suplex sends Dunne outside, where he has to deal with an interfering Tony D’Angelo. Back in and the Bitter End finishes Anthony at 4:42.

Rating: C. Anthony got to do some stuff here before falling to Dunne, as he should have. What surprised me here was the fact that Dunne had to deal with the interference but didn’t lose as a result. It was nice to see a change from the expected result, as WWE has a bad tendency to stick with the same tired formulas.

Post match Dunne goes after D’Angelo and busts out a bunch of weapons. D’Angelo declares the guy “Looney Tunes” and Dunne says let’s take all of these weapons and attach them to the cage. Sure why not.

Zoey Stark says Io Shirai needs a new partner for the Dusty Classic. She needs to be someone hard hitting and just as crazy as Shirai, so Shirai says she’s in.

Dakota Kai finds Wendy Choo’s shopping bags (which she and Amari Miller just left there) and says they won’t make her happy.

LA Knight vs. Sanga

Grayson Waller is here with Sanga. Knight comes to the ring and instantly feels like a star. He looks like he has been there before and has charisma instead of being the same assembly line style person with some gimmick that defines him. It’s such a notable difference. Knight slugs away at Sanga (with the amazing mustache) to start but gets knocked outside with a single shot.

Sanga gets posted (that sounded hard) but is still able to block BFT. Knight is right back up with a springboard dropkick for two, with Sanga kicking him off. Waller takes off a turnbuckle pad, but the distracted referee misses Knight raking Sanga’s eyes. Sanga misses a charge into the exposed buckle though and it’s a jumping neckbreaker to give Knight the pin at 3:11.

Rating: D+. It wasn’t exactly good but I’ll take this over building Sanga up as the next monster with little chance of becoming a star. Knight vs. Waller isn’t quite a mega feud but it’s something for Knight to do before he (presumably) gets called up to the main roster. Sanga looks intimidating but he wasn’t exactly looking great here, which probably won’t stop him around here.

Post match Knight jumps Waller and beats him down but has to bail from Sanga.

Duke Hudson isn’t worried about Dante Chen….and he wants Indi Hartwell to win the Women’s Tag Team Titles.

It’s time for a Championship Summit between Bron Breakker and Santos Escobar. Breakker is ready to fight and says let’s just flip the table over right now. Escobar calls him naive and says he is pulling all the strings. Breakker still wants to fight….and here is Dolph Ziggler, who has been arguing with Breakker on Youtube and Twitter. Ziggler has a seat at the table and puts his feet up before saying Breakker is doing well enough on Twitter, but who is he? Breakker: “I’M THE NEXT CHAMPION PAL!” He offers Ziggler the next shot after Escobar, but Ziggler calls that a rookie mistake.

Ziggler lists off his accomplishments and says that even though he has lost 99/100 matches or so, Breakker knows what he can do. Cue Tommaso Ciampa to cut Ziggler off (while calling him kid) and say he likes the idea of getting the title back. Escobar cuts them both off and says he’s going to win the title and then deal with Ziggler and Ciampa. That’s not cool with Ciampa, who says he’s next in line, if that’s ok with Kid.

Ziggler laughs off the idea of Ciampa fighting in the same place in front of the same people and wants to know when the gloves come off. Ciampa kicks him in the face and they fight tot he floor, leaving Legado del Fantasma to jump Breakker from behind. Breakker fights back but gets put through the table to leave him laying.

This was a nice surprise as Ziggler is the kind of person who could do a lot of good around here. We get one of his best promos in a LONG time as he was getting to do something different than the same stuff he has been doing for about ten years now on the main roster. Ziggler vs. Ciampa to set up Ziggler vs. Breakker works, as NXT gets some star power from someone who could be useful around here. Good stuff and better thinking.

Kay Lee Ray breaks a bunch of stuff with her bat.

Grayson Waller says LA Knight just broke his restraining order and next week, he’s going to jail.

Dakota Kai vs. Sarray

Joined in progress with Sarray missing the Sunray dropkick and getting caught with some running kicks to the face in the corner. A missile dropkick gives Sarray two but Kai hits a Scorpion kick (on the second try) for two of her own. Back up and Kai misses her kick in the corner, setting up a kick from Sarray. The Sunray dropkick sets up the high collar suplex for the pin on Kai at 4:11.

Rating: C. I’m not sure what is going on with Kai but she has gone from someone who felt ready to break into the main event scene to cannon fodder for the Sarray rebuilding project. This was a competitive match but it was over in four minutes with Sarray hitting her scary finisher for the win. Kai seems in a downward spiral and that’s kind of weird given how much more she has been appearing with her new persona.

Carmelo Hayes and Trick Williams are at the barber shop and convince everyone that Hayes is the favorite against Cameron Grimes next week. As usual, Hayes is one of the best things about this show as he feels like he’s being an amped up version of himself rather than a character.

Toxic Attraction and Indi Hartwell/Persia Pirotta talk trash about their Tag Team Title match. A photo of Hartwell/Duke Hudson is pulled out though and the fight is on.

WWE celebrates Black History Month with a look at Jackie Joyner-Kersee.

Nikkita Lyons knows how to sing and how to fight.

Brooks Jensen and Josh Briggs try to ask out Kayden Carter and Kacy Catanzaro for Valentine’s Day but it winds up being more of a group thing. Jensen even offers to pay Briggs to take one of them away at a movie but doesn’t have much money.

Dusty Rhodes Tag Team Classic Semifinals: MSK vs. Malik Blade/Edris Enofe

MSK takes over on Blade to start and a Bronco Buster gets an early one. Enofe comes in and gets kicked down as well, meaning it’s back to Blade, who gets kicked down again. We take a break with MSK in full control and come back with Enofe getting suplexed down. Blade comes back in for a rollup on Lee and a gordbuster/cutter combination gets two. Carter comes back in for a save though and Blade is sent to the floor. A corner dropkick sets up the Doomsday Blockbuster to send MSK to the finals at 9:30.

Rating: C+. They had a tricky path to walk here as MSK felt like major favorites who then had to make you believe that Blade and Enofe had a chance. That didn’t really happen, but I like Blade and Enofe together. At the same time though, MSK needed to win here as the Creeds beating Blade and Enofe wasn’t going to mean a thing.

Cameron Grimes is in Cameron, North Carolina and talks about his humble beginnings. Now he is a self made man and has everything he wants…except some gold.

Wendy Choo mocks Dakota Kai for losing her match and leaves in a huff.

Indi Hartwell/Persia Pirotta jump Toxic Attraction on the way to the ring but Mandy Rose, who wasn’t really hurt, has to defend the title anyway.

Women’s Title: Mandy Rose vs. Kay Lee Ray

Rose is defending and gets chopped so hard that her choker is knocked off. Rose gets in a few shots of her own but is quickly knocked outside, setting up the dive from Ray. Back in and Rose sends her head first into the middle buckle and then does it over and over for a bonus. The bodyscissors goes on and we get an audio update on Toxic Attraction and Hartwell/Pirotta being escorted from the building.

Ray gets her face slammed into the mat and it’s off to an abdominal stretch with an elbow in the ribs. That’s broken up and Ray pulls her into a Koji Clutch but Rose is out pretty fast. The KLR Bomb is countered into a sunset flip to give Rose two but Ray superkicks her down. Ray goes up….and Toxic Attraction is here anyway to distract the referee/shove Ray off the top. Rose’s running knee retains the title at 8:02.

Rating: C-. After having watched Ray for a long time in NXT UK, it is sad to see her being toned down like this so Rose can keep up. I don’t think it’s any secret that Rose isn’t the best in the ring, but she is wrestling/acting EXACTLY as she should be. It wouldn’t make sense for Rose to be out there tearing the house down when she openly brags about how her looks get her everywhere. She wrestles a safe, basic style that gets her where she needs to go and I’ll take that over a lot of the other people you see doing the same match over and over. That being said, the ending sucked the life out of this and that’s never good.

Post match Toxic Attraction loads up the bat but Io Shirai runs in for the save. Toxic Attraction is cleared out and we have another Dusty Classic team to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. I almost never have any idea what to make of this show anymore and that was the case again here. It’s a bunch of stuff happening and while there are good parts, there are also a lot of things that are just flat out dumb. They try to rush through too many things and it leaves you with a lot of “get this over with” feelings. The good stuff does work and there was a lot of it tonight, but then you see one of WWE’s bad ideas and you know it’s only going to get worse.

Results
Creed Brothers b. Grizzled Young Veterans – Basement lariat to Gibson
Tiffany Stratton b. Wendy Choo – Twisting Vader Bomb
Pete Dunne b. Draco Anthony – Bitter End
LA Knight b. Sanga – Jumping neckbreaker
Sarray b. Dakota Kai – Sunray dropkick
MSK b. Malik Blade/Edris Enofe – Doomsday Blockbuster to Enofe
Mandy Rose b. Kay Lee Ray – Running knee

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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AND

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Monday Night Raw
Date: February 7, 2022
Location: Ball Arena, Denver, Colorado
Commentators: Jim Smith, Byron Saxton, Corey Graves

We have less than two weeks to go before Elimination Chamber and a lot of the big matches are set. Since this is Raw, we have two Elimination Chamber matches set up, plus Becky Lynch vs. Lita, as Smackdown doesn’t seem all that important this month. Tonight is a special show since we are on SyFy due to the Winter Olympics, so we have NO COMMERCIALS in the first hour. I’m thrilled too. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open big with the final round of the Academic Challenge between RKBro and the Alpha Academy. This time around, it’s a Quiz Bowl competition and after looking at the spelling bee/scooter race being split, we’re ready to go. Chad Gable explains the rules: it’s one point per question and if you get it wrong, the other team gets to steal. One point per answer, first to give points wins.

Alpha Academy gets the history question (who was the first President with a college degree) right but Riddle evens it up in biology (how many hearts does an octopus have). They trade Greek Mythology (who flew too close to the sun) and Cartoons (which Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle used nunchucks) and it’s tied at two. Otis knows that Texas is the biggest of the 48 continental states but Riddle doesn’t know whose father-in-law Justin Bieber is. Randy guesses Alec Baldwin (of the four Baldwin choices) and gets it wrong, only for Gable to steal the point (with Stephen Baldwin) and goes up 4-2.

Film And Literature doesn’t go so well as Gable thinks Romeo and Juliet has been made into more films than Hamlet. Riddle knows it though and it’s 4-3. Orton picks Sports and gets a question about the Denver Broncos, which the fans help him get right. With the score tied at 4-4, Gable insults the fans and gets the final category of Metric Conversions. Gable doesn’t know how many grams are in an ounce, but Orton gets it right for the win. Gable goes into a huge rant and keeps getting buzzed. Cue the Street Profits to say Alpha Academy owes RKBro a title shot, but Gable wants a match right now.

Alpha Academy vs. Street Profits

Non-title. Ford strikes away at Gable to start and everything breaks down early on. Gable kicks Ford out to the apron for a breather and it’s Otis coming in to slow it down a bit. The big splash crushes Ford and it’s off to the neck crank to make it worse. A running splash in the corner connects but Ford avoids a second to send Otis into the post.

The double tag brings in Dawkins to slug away at Gable. Dawkins hits a running splash in the corner and grabs a t-bone suplex for a bonus. Otis has to make a save so Ford hits a big running flip dive to take him down on the floor. That leaves Gable to pull Dawkins into the ankle lock and the counter gives Gable the pin at 5:37.

Rating: C+. Both teams looked good here and the counter into the clean pin was a nice way to go. Gable and Otis get some extra momentum on the way to whenever they have to defend their titles against RKBro. Good for a fast TV match though and I’ll take what I can get from something like that on Raw.

Video on Lita.

MVP brings out Bobby Lashley, complete with his own Paul Heyman style intro. Hometown boy Lashley gets the kind of reception that you would expect and MVP talks about how Lashley took the title from Brock Lesnar. Then Lesnar won the Royal Rumble and has earned another shot at Wrestlemania. Well done, but now he wants in the Elimination Chamber as well, which is pure fantasy.

Lesnar is in the match but taking the title from Lashley is pure fantasy. Lashley says THE CHAMP LIVES HERE before talking about how Lesnar disrespected him. Last week Lesnar came to the show and said he wanted to get into the chamber. What Lesnar doesn’t realize is that he’ll be locked inside with Lashley. After the Elimination Chamber, Lashley is going to Wrestlemania with his title. Pretty simple and to the point promo here.

We look at Alexa Bliss getting her (replica) Lily doll last week.

This week, Bliss seems to love the doll but hands it over to the therapist, leaving her in tears.

Damian Priest vs. AJ Styles

Non-title. Styles ducks some shots in the corner and chops away before getting dropped with a jumping elbow to the jaw. Priest is sent outside for a slingshot forearm but comes right back with a running clothesline inside. Styles slips out of a superplex and has to escape the Reckoning.

The Styles Clash is broken up as well so Styles hits a fireman’s carry backbreaker for two. A kick to the head staggers Styles though and a bulldog driver gets two. Another exchange of strikes to the head goes to Styles…but Priest falls on top of him for two anyway. That was a bit odd but Priest is fine enough to break up the Phenomenal Forearm. AJ is right back with the Phenomenal Forearm for the pin at 4:55.

Rating: B-. For those of you keeping track, that is Priest’s third straight singles loss and fifth out of six singles matches. I would really like to believe that WWE isn’t cooling off on him but that seems to be the situation at the moment. Other than that, we had a good match here with Styles getting a win before he moves on to a bigger match. I’m sure the only way to build him up was a win over the United States Champion too.

Smackdown Breakdown.

Seth Rollins mocks Kevin Owens for not making it into the Elimination Chamber but Owens thinks he might be lying. That’s a negative from Rollins, who laughs a lot.

It’s time for MizTV with Maryse here with Miz. They waste no time in bringing out the Mysterios as this week’s guests (with Miz and Maryse dancing during the entrance). Miz mocks Dominik for losing last week and puts his hand up to silence the crowd. Of course Miz didn’t cheat to win last week, unlike Edge and Beth Phoenix at the Royal Rumble.

Miz talks about how he used the Money in the Bank contract to become WWE Champion last year but the fans still think he is a cheater. Somehow though, Rey Mysterio is on the cover of WWE2K22 instead of the Miz. What does Rey have that Miz or Maryse doesn’t? Maryse thinks she was great at the Rumble and thinks Rey should call himself Rey Marysesterio. Dominik gets in Miz’s face and the rematch is on. Miz likes the guts, and thinks Dominik is Eddie Guerrero’s son.

Dominik Mysterio vs. Miz

Dominik starts fast by taking Miz down but Maryse breaks up the 619. That’s enough for an ejection, but Miz kicks Dominik in the face anyway. The referee gets rid of Maryse so Rey trips Miz, allowing Dominik to grab the pin at 1:40.

Post match Dominik does the Eddie Guerrero dance to celebrate.

Nikki Ash vs. Bianca Belair

Belair, whose hair is a bit more down this week, runs her over to start and does her dance. The delay lets Nikki tie Belair’s leg up in the ropes and put on a half crab. That’s broke up and Belair hits a fall away slam into some slams, albeit with some limping. Some rolling suplexes get two on Nikki but she’s back with a tornado DDT; Belair catches her with a kick in the corner though and it’s the KOD to finish Nikki at 3:57.

Rating: C. The selling was pretty good, though maybe Belair stopping to dance while selling the leg wasn’t the best look. Belair is great at the athleticism but she goes with that dance WAY too much. Other than that, Nikki’s crash continues, but at least she got in some offense here. She is just going to be cannon fodder in the chamber, but this could have been more of a squash.

The 24/7 chase continues, with Dana Brooke saying Reggie is such a sweet guy. She kisses him on the cheek, but says they’re really good friends. They hug, with Reggie teasing a regular kiss before the 24/7 goons chase them off.

Kevin Owens vs. Austin Theory

Theory goes intense to start and stomps him down in the corner, followed by a hard whip into another corner. Back up and Owens sends him into the corner, setting up a trip to the floor. A flip dive off the steps crushes Theory and we take a break. Back with Owens hitting a Cannonball to send Theory outside.

The frog splash off the apron crushes Theory for two back inside but they trade finisher escapes. Owens’ spinning superplex is broken up so he settles for a super Regal Roll. The Swanton only hits raised knees but Owens blocks a rolling something with a superkick. Owens Stuns him for the pin at 9:00.

Rating: C+. They were packing in a good bit of action here, which is partially due to Owens dropping some weight in recent months. He has been moving better as a result and the matches have improved as well. Theory losing again is likely to make Vince McMahon angry, which could make for another step forward. Given McMahon’s interactions, it would seem that Theory has a perfectly fine future and that’s nice to see.

Randy Orton gives Riddle a pep talk/advice for the Elimination Chamber but tells him to focus on Seth Rollins tonight. Riddle is grateful and even invites Orton to a celebratory toga party next week. Orton seems ready to shake his head.

Veer Mahaan is still coming.

Here is Lita for a chat. She was fired up to get to be in the Royal Rumble with some of the biggest stars today. Then she showed up on Raw to challenge Becky Lynch, because she has been wanting that match for a long time. Cue Lynch to say how much that means to her. She has wanted to be Lita for so long but now that she is the champ, there is need for Lita.

Lynch is the star around here and now Lita shows up around the most important time of the year asking for a title shot? Lita talks about how she was some punk rock kid who chased her dreams. The people made her a four time Women’s Champion, but Lynch says Lita can keep the people. The fight is on with Becky getting the better of things but making the mistake of going back. That means a Twist of Fate into the Litasault to leave Becky laying. Lita still isn’t a great talker, but they both got the point across here.

Kevin Owens comes up to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about taking Austin Theory’s place in the Elimination Chamber. That isn’t happening, because last week’s qualifying matches were final. Owens wants to go to Wrestlemania as WWE Champion and talks about how much Texas means to him. He basically begs but nothing is said.

Liv Morgan vs. Doudrop

Doudrop goes with the power to start so Morgan tries the eternally bad idea of trying a choke. Morgan gets driven into the corner though and we take a break. Back with Doudrop hitting the backsplash but Morgan manages to fight up. A series of strikes rock Doudrop and the springboard spinning Codebreaker gets two. Morgan’s hurricanrana is countered into an electric chair faceplant for a near fall, followed by the Vader Bomb to crush Morgan for the pin at 8:09.

Rating: C-. Call it a hunch, but the fact that Morgan is clearly on the downside of her big push made it clear that she was losing here. The fact that Doudrop has already lost her title shot doesn’t matter. Morgan’s time near the title is over and that is kind of a shame, as the fans seemed ready to go with her, but that doesn’t seem to be happening anytime soon.

We look at Alexa Bliss’ therapy earlier.

And now, more of Bliss’ therapy. She has been trying to control her anger but might have beaten up a woman (who looked like Lily) at the grocery store. The therapist thinks they have more work to do.

Seth Rollins has done everything but headline Wrestlemania as WWE Champion so he’ll have to win the title in the Elimination Chamber.

Seth Rollins vs. Riddle

Rollins throws him down to start but Riddle grabs an early armbar. With that broken up, Rollins takes it outside for a buckle bomb against the barricade and we take a break. Back with Riddle fighting out of a chinlock but getting caught with an Alberto top rope double stomp instead. Riddle blocks a clothesline with a kick to the head though and the forearms in the corner rock Rollins again. Riddle sends him outside for the apron kick to the chest and a springboard Floating Bro. Cue Kevin Owens to jump Riddle for the DQ at 7:49.

Rating: C. This was starting to get going before the ending, which was a good way to protect both of them. I’m not sure how much sense it makes to have either of the people in a World Title match so this could have been a lot worse. That being said, I think you can guess what is coming in the rest of the show.

Post match the beatdown is on until Randy Orton runs in for the save and let’s do that tag match thing.

RKBro vs. Kevin Owens/Seth Rollins

Joined in progress with Orton working on Rollins and taking him outside for a drop onto the announcers’ table. Back in and it’s off to Riddle but Owens comes in off a blind tag and takes over. The backsplash gets two on Riddle and Owens mocks Orton a bit for a bonus. Rollins adds a top rope ax handle and an elbow to the jaw cuts off the comeback bid.

A double stomp gives Owens two and there’s a heck of a chop in the corner. Rollins misses the big frog splash and Riddle’s jumping knee drops Owens. There’s the hot tag to Orton to start cleaning house but Rollins blocks the RKO. It’s back to Riddle, who gets caught with a rolling elbow to the face. Another one to the back of the head sets up the Stomp for the pin at 8:05.

Rating: C+. There are your #1 contenders, who managed to get a title shot and then lose a match in the span of about two and a half hours. I know the Tag Team Titles don’t mean anything but could they at least pretend like they matter? Rollins getting a win means more and his story is more important, though you would think they might have a better idea on how to do this.

Post match Orton hits Owens with an RKO to blow off some steam and end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The word “bleh” comes to mind with this one, as it felt like a bunch of filling in time before we get to the important stuff next Saturday. That makes for a really dull three hours, with the extra fifteen minutes without commercials in the first hour making it worse. There was good action here, but it was more 50/50 booking and people not getting much of anywhere. I want to see how Elimination Chamber goes but they aren’t making the build to it all that thrilling.

Results
Alpha Academy b. Street Profits – Rollup to Dawkins
AJ Styles b. Damian Priest – Phenomenal Forearm
Dominik Mysterio b. Miz – Rollup
Bianca Belair b. Nikki Ash – KOD
Kevin Owens b. Austin Theory – Stunner
Doudrop b. Liv Morgan -Vader Bomb
Riddle b. Seth Rollins via DQ when Kevin Owens interfered
Seth Rollins/Kevin Owens b. RKBro – Stomp to Riddle

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

Remember to check out Wrestlingrumors.net for all of your wrestling headline needs.

Smackdown
Date: August 31, 2007
Location: Times Union Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We’re done with Summerslam and that means it is time to start getting ready for Unforgiven. While a series of vignettes has already said that Undertaker will be back, likely to face Mark Henry, we are also likely getting another Batista vs. Great Khali match for the World Title. It wasn’t pretty the first time, but Khali got himself disqualified to set up a likely rematch. Happy day to us. Let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

Rey Mysterio is back tonight.

Teddy Long is in the ring with the Great Khali and Runjin Singh. Long gets straight to the point: tonight it’s a Championship Competition to crown a new #1 contender. First up, it’s Finlay vs. Kane, with the winner facing the winner of the winner of Rey Mysterio vs. Batista for the Unforgiven title shot. Back in my day we called that a tournament but that doesn’t have alliteration.

Championship Competition First Round: Kane vs. Finlay

Kane doesn’t have his ribs taped this time. Finlay puts the Shillelagh down in the corner so Kane picks it up to change things a bit. The referee makes him drop it, allowing Hornswoggle to pop up and take it away. Kane knocks Finlay down and hits a basement dropkick, which has JBL talking about a pot of neckbone.

They head outside with Kane being sent into the steps to bang up the ribs again. Back in and Finlay hits his own basement dropkick but Kane kicks him away for a breather. Kane goes with a simple strategy of hit Finlay in the face, setting up the side slam. The chokeslam connects but Kane loads up the Tombstone (which he hasn’t used in a long time). Finlay slips out and it’s a Hornswoggle distraction so the Shillelagh can knock Kane cold for the pin.

Rating: C. These two know how to have a hard hitting fight and that ‘s what they did here, albeit with a few shenanigans thrown in. Finlay getting the win is a bit of a surprise, but it isn’t a big enough upset that it is unbelievable. Kane even gets protected thanks to the Shillelagh. They kept to the point here and while it wasn’t as good as the Summerslam match, it was nice to see them do it again.

We look at Deuce N Domino breaking up Matt Hardy and MVP’s game of basketball to help set up this week’s Tag Team Title match.

Jesse and Festus talk about going back to school. Festus did all of the advance learning and learned Latin and advanced trigonometry.

Tag Team Titles: MVP/Matt Hardy vs. Deuce N Domino

Deuce N Domino are challenging and have Cherry in their corner. Matt isn’t wasting time and jumps the champs before the bell. That lets MVP grab some early rollups for two each on Domino but Matt tags himself in, much to MVP’s annoyance. The bulldog out of the corner gets two on Domino and a double clothesline takes the champs down. Now it’s MVP tagging himself in, allowing Matt to take his shirt off.

Matt is right back in, as MVP doesn’t seem like he is allowed to do much yet. Domino uses one of the distractions to get in a shot of his own to take over as we take a break. Back with Matt still in trouble in the corner, including Deuce dropping a leg for two. The chinlock goes on and then goes on again after Matt’s comeback is cut off.

Some knees to the face get two on Matt but he fights his way out of the corner for a breather. Domino is sent into Deuce and gets taken down by the Side Effect, allowing the tag off to MVP. Granted it’s in the form of a slap to the face, but Matt hits the Twist of Fate on Domino so MVP can steal the pin and the titles.

Rating: C. They didn’t have many options here as MVP was limited to rollups and covers due to his health issues. There is some good opportunity for some trash talk between the two of them though and the story does have some legs. As for Deuce N Domino, they held the titles for a long time, but there is only so much that can be done when you have no teams to face and have nothing to do most weeks. Maybe Matt and MVP can do better, but there isn’t much of a division to speak of at the moment.

MVP posts with all three titles and Matt is stunned.

Batista comes in to see Vince McMahon, who is rather impressed by Batista’s physique. Vince talks about their various similarities and thinks Batista might be his son. Batista does think there are some similarities, but talks about how he was raised by a single mother who could barely keep food on the table. If Vince was his father and didn’t contribute a dime to anything, violence would ensue. Come to think of it, Vince doesn’t believe they look that much alike.

Teddy Long and Kristal are getting married in three weeks.

Eugene is here with a t-shirt gun but Mark Henry comes out to…well I think you get the idea. Henry says that the Undertaker is coming back at Unforgiven (the Undertaker videos saying UNFORGIVEN might have given it away) so here’s another Undertaker video, with Undertaker’s hand popping out of the ground.

Championship Competition First Round: Batista vs. Rey Mysterio

They shake hands and hug to start before Batista powers him into the corner. After a clean break, Batista does it again to prove his point. Rey gets smart by trying the speed and spins around Batista, who blasts him with a clothesline. Batista doesn’t seem happy as he sends Rey outside and then runs him over for two back inside.

The chinlock with a bodyscissors goes on for a fairly good while until Rey fights up. A dropkick cuts off Batista’s knee but he hits Rey in the face again. That still doesn’t sit well with Batista, allowing Rey to hit a springboard seated senton for two. Batista plants him with the spinebuster but here is Finlay with a chair. That’s cut off and Batista grabs the chair but shoves the referee does for the DQ by mistake.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t exactly a great match but at least they gave Batista a reason not to crush Rey. It was nice to have something other than destruction and it ties into their history together for a change. The setup of Rey vs. Finlay for the title match is interesting, but it doesn’t leave much for Batista to do.

We take a long look at Vince McMahon on Carlito’s Cabana on Raw, resulting in HHH bringing out a bunch of women from Vince’s past. Hilarity did not ensue.

Ashley is going to be on the next season of Survivor.

Here are Vince McMahon and Coach for a chat. Vince talks about HHH bringing out a bunch of “freaks” on Monday, but he only has relations with beautiful women. Vince: “They have all felt my rock hard…..body.” Coach wants to prove that Vince has great taste in women by bringing out some women that Vince has, ahem, known over the years. First up is a woman from New York in 1983, who still remembers the unbridled passion.

Next up is New Year’s Eve 1977, which apparently is the first time he met Howard Finkel. Vince doesn’t like that memory so Coach brings out the three women from the same night. That means some details from Vince, with Coach having to cut him off. They’re all happy to remember ringing in the new year with a bang, with Vince seeming pleased.

Finally, we have Mary Katherine…who is now a nun. This has Vince freaked out but she talks about how that one night in 1981 at the Cape Cod Coliseum made her realize that only God could be better than him. Coach: “She was second to none.” Coach laughs at the pun and Vince wants new memories with them together. The women leave so Vince talks about his family showing up this week. Vince can’t stand the attorneys they’re bringing in, but he wants his son to see what family is really like. I don’t see that going well, but it almost has to be better than this stupid thing.

It’s time for Chuck Palumbo to take the Masterlock Challenge. Masters jumps him instead of putting the hold on but gets cleared out.

Raw Rebound.

Jamie Noble is obsessed with taking out Hornswoggle next week. Shannon Moore wishes him luck by putting an “I Heart Leprechauns” sign on his back.

Rey Mysterio vs. Finlay

The winner gets a title shot at Great Khali at Unforgiven. Finlay goes after Rey’s bad back to start but gets low bridged to the floor. That means a Hornswoggle distraction so Finlay can sit on Rey’s back as we take a break. Back with Finlay running Rey over and hitting a slam to keep the target simple. The half crab goes on until Rey fights up and hits an enziguri. The 619 to the back of the head sets up a springboard sunset flip to give Rey the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C. This was short and another not great match as they were moving pretty fast. The whole thing couldn’t have been nine minutes, which isn’t that long when you have a commercial in the middle. It doesn’t help that we have seen Rey vs. Khali before and it was pretty terrible all things considered. Maybe they can come up with something better this time, but this could bode badly.

Post match Great Khali comes out and goes after Rey but Batista makes the save. Cole and JBL talk about how this is like David vs. Goliath, meaning Rey is going to need a slingshot and God to survive.

Overall Rating: C-. The show had a point and a focus, but that doesn’t mean it was all that interesting. The one night mini tournament was a good way to go, though it would have been nice to have a match that I actually liked watching. They did what they needed to do here, but they did it in about as boring of a way possible. On the bright side, MVP and Matt Hardy as champions could be good, so at least there is something here.

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ECW on Sci Fi
Date: August 28, 2007
Location: Times Union Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

Summerslam has come and gone and since ECW doesn’t mean much in the grand scheme of WWE, there is only one match of note. In this case, that would be John Morrison retaining his ECW World Title over CM Punk (again). That means Morrison needs a new challenger and we’re getting another #1 contenders match. Let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here is John Morrison (in slow motion) to brag about retaining the ECW World Title. At Summerslam, he united the people and created CM Punk’s new reality when he beat Punk again. Since there is a four way tonight to crown a new #1 contender, let’s look at the four men who want to join the Palace of Wisdom. There is the Boogeyman, who is coming to get him, but Morrison is beyond good and evil and it takes more than worms to scare him.

Then we have the Miz, who says he is a chick magnet, but actions speak louder than words. Hoorah. Third is Big Daddy V, and let’s hope he doesn’t win for the sake of humanity. Finally there is CM Punk, and come on already. Let’s take a look at his straightedge lifestyle. Punk doesn’t do anything, which seems to include winning titles. Oh but he does get tattoos. Imagine if he got a tattoo for every time Morrison beat him! None of the four are going to beat Morrison anyway so it doesn’t matter.

Stevie Richards vs. Kevin Thorn

Richards has had Thorn’s number as of late and Thorn is about to snap. Thorn pounds on Richards to start and stomps him down in the corner as the anger comes out. A beal sends Richards flying again and a comeback is cut off with a drop across the corner. Richards’ throat is dropped across the ropes and Thorn drives him hard into the barricade. The Razor’s Edge is countered so Thorn clotheslines him down to stay on the throat. Richards starts kicking away for two of his own and a rollup is good for the same. That’s enough for Thorn, who hits a torture rack backbreaker and the Original Sin finishes Richards off.

Rating: C-. This was little more than a squash, but it was also disappointing. Richards had gotten a small push in the last few weeks and then he just loses here. Thorn isn’t exactly an exciting option for a heel and I’m not sure how far he is going to be able to go even with this story over. Richards didn’t have the brightest future, but I was more interested in his winning streak than anything Thorn is probably doing.

Video on the Boogeyman.

Balls Mahoney runs into the Miz and Extreme Expose. Miz was shocked Mahoney won last week, but Kelly Kelly doesn’t seem thrilled. They even cut her off from saying anything, leaving Brook and Layla to call Mahoney a loser. The four of them go to leave, with Kelly wishing Mahoney luck.

John Morrison is in Armando Estrada’s office to find out who is going to be the new #1 contender. CM Punk pops in, with Morrison saying he wants another title shot handed to him. Punk says he’ll earn it, without having to put his feet on the ropes like Morrison did at Summerslam. Violence is teased, but Punk eats cantaloupe instead. Morrison: “That guy has got some serious daddy issues.”

Balls Mahoney vs. Elijah Burke

Miz and Extreme Expose are at ringside. Burke jumps Mahoney to start, earning himself some shots to the face. The comeback has Kelly Kelly up and cheering, which doesn’t sit well with everyone else. Some more shots to the face put Mahoney down for two but the fans are behind him anyway.

The headstand elbow in the corner sets up a front facelock as Kelly continues to play cheerleader. An STO plants Mahoney to cut off a comeback and the chinlock is on. That’s the trigger to a comeback (of course) and Mahoney hits the Nutcracker Suite for two. Burke catches him up top with a superplex though and the Elijah Express is good for the pin.

Rating: C-. Much like the previous match, someone who won a match to start a little something loses to the bigger star, cutting off almost any interest there might have been. It also isn’t the best sign for Miz’s chances tonight if he’s involved with Mahoney here. The Kelly deal is kind of interesting, but it would be better if she hadn’t done the same thing with CM Punk last year.

Post match Miz laughs at Mahoney’s loss but Kelly Kelly checks on him before leaving.

Miz vs. CM Punk vs. Big Daddy V vs. Boogeyman

One fall to a finish and the winner gets a future ECW World Title shot. Miz is in the ring when we come back from a break, despite going to the back before the break. Matt Striker is here with V as a bonus. Everyone goes after V to start and get knocked away without much effort. V starts splashing people in the corner, with Miz being knocked outside. Boogeyman starts the comeback but gets pulled to the floor instead. Punk is thrown to the floor but V would rather chop Miz.

There’s a chop to Punk to keep things even as the pain continues. V misses a charge and falls over the barricade, leaving Miz to knee Boogeyman down. Back in and Miz hits the running clothesline for two on Punk, who comes back with a slam. The legdrop misses though and Miz grabs a fairly illogical chinlock. Punk breaks that up without much trouble and hits a running knee. The springboard clothesline gives Punk two and the GTS finishes Miz for the title shot.

Rating: D+. What a weird match. Miz vs. Punk was perfectly fine, but this wasn’t a Miz vs. Punk match. Boogeyman and V disappeared for most of the match, which wasn’t that long in the first place. I’m not sure what happened to Boogeyman there, but at least there was a reason for V to be gone. Weird match, though at least they didn’t waste time with anything but the only real choice for a winner.

Post match V slams Boogeyman on the floor and stares at Punk, who gets out before he being crushed.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t their strongest showing, as it was more about getting things back to normal, which meant cutting the legs off from some people who were making some headway. Punk vs. Morrison again might be boring, but who else is there to go after the title? This needs to be Punk’s big win though, as he can only take so many losses. Not a good show this week though, and that isn’t the greatest surprise given the show’s issues with lack of talent depth.

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Monday Night Raw
Date: August 27, 2007
Location: TD Banknorth Garden, Boston, Massachusetts
Attendance: 15,135
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with Summerslam and the big story is that John Cena defeated Randy Orton to retain the Raw World Title. That isn’t something I would have bet on and the ending so clean was even more of a surprise. Usually that would mean the end of a feud but that isn’t how things tend to work in WWE. Let’s get to it.

Here is Summerslam if you need a recap.

We look at John Cena retaining the Raw World Title over Randy Orton in the Summerslam main event.

Here is Orton to get things going. Orton can’t believe that Cena retained the title at Summerslam but now he wants a rematch. The next time will be different because he is demanding another shot against Cena. Cue Cena, who pauses to hug his dad (uh oh) in the front row. Cena talks about how Orton is making excuses but lost last night. Orton wanted to make a statement, but now Cena has a statement of his own: THE CHAMP IS HERE!

Last night, Orton lost and Cena thinks there is someone who made his return and deserves a shot. While he can’t make matches, Cena likes the idea of defending against HHH tonight. Cue William Regal to say Cena won’t be facing either HHH or Orton, because he’ll be facing an imperial man: King Booker. Cue Booker, so Orton tries a quick RKO on Cena but gets shoved away. Orton seethes and leaves after we got to the point more quickly than usual.

Mr. Kennedy vs. Jeff Hardy

Feeling out process to start with Kennedy taking him into the corner but getting slapped in the face. Hardy claps the fans into things and gets pummeled in the corner for his efforts. Some knees to the ribs and shots to the back of the head put Hardy down again but he fires off right hands in the corner of his own. A clothesline sends Kennedy outside and Hardy hits the big dive as we take a break.

Back with Kennedy working on a bodyscissors before sending Hardy ribs first into the post. The logic continues with an abdominal stretch before Kennedy drives him back first into the corner. That’s broken up and Hardy hits a quick Whisper in the Wind for a breather. A rollup gets two and there’s the slingshot dropkick in the corner to rock Kennedy again. The Swanton only hits knees though….and here is Umaga to chase Kennedy off and superkick Hardy for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This was oddly more about punching and kicking than you might expect, which isn’t usually Hardy’s style. They were getting into more of the rhythm that these two might have been expected to have before Umaga came in to kick Hardy’s head off. That should set up the next title feud and Hardy vs. the monster is something that could work very well. I’m not sure what is next for Kennedy, but he could use something else to do.

We see some clips of HHH returning to beat King Booker last night, with JR’s mic being a bit messed up.

Vince McMahon is on his way to the ring for an announcement on Carlito’s Cabana. Mr. Kennedy comes up and Vince compliments him on his match and says watch out for that Umaga. Kennedy wishes Vince a belated birthday and Vince points out that his middle name is Kennedy as well. This seems to leave Kennedy intrigued.

It’s time for Carlito’s Cabana with Vince McMahon as the special guest. Vince comes out and pleasantries are exchanged, with Vince saying he is now fifty years old (plus twelve more) and ordering everyone here to answer to him. Cue HHH to interrupt, with the fans going rather coconuts. HHH says Vince is now seventy and needs to worry about going senile.

Worry not though, because HHH is here and he has done some extensive research. He has narrowed the mother of Vince’s son down to four women so here they are. First up we have a woman from Wrestlemania III, who a drunken Vince thought was Aretha Franklin. That would be a rather large woman named Mary, with Vince saying she sang like Aretha that night. Then it’s One Eyed Wendy, who lost her sight in one eye due to Vince, ahem, missing. HHH: “Looks like a hole in one.”

Third is….Carlito’s sister! Vince tells Carlito that they thought he was asleep, but HHH wants to know why the sister (who basically looks like a female Carlito) isn’t spitting. Finally there is someone Vince knew as Frankie but now it’s Frank. Hold on though as Frank is out due to having the wrong physical attributes.

Vince throws them all out and HHH talks about Vince being accused of running an illegal cockfighting ring. This leads to Vince listing the animals he loves, capped off by saying he loves co…and he cuts himself off. Vince leaves so Carlito yells at HHH, including spitting the apple in his face. Destruction ensues and HHH has a seat in the chair. The gag wasn’t that great, but HHH being back and being less serious is a good thing.

The Condemned is on DVD.

World’s Greatest Tag Team/Daivari vs. Paul London/Brian Kendrick/Cody Rhodes

London armbars Daivari to start and hands it off to Kendrick. That doesn’t go as well as it’s off to Haas, who gets caught in Haas’ overhead belly to belly suplex. The now blond Shelton Benjamin (that looks stupid) comes in to suplex Kendrick as well but Daivari misses an elbow. That’s enough to bring in Cody for a powerslam but Haas and Benjamin make the save. Everything breaks down and a high crossbody to Daivari gives Cody the fast pin.

Rating: C. Pretty by the book six man match here but what matters is continuing with Cody’s push. He isn’t getting any major wins or setting the world on fire but he is showing up and winning matches, which is how you make someone feel like a bigger deal. The other five guys just happened to be there, but it is better than having the same match over and over.

Post break Daivari is still in the ring but here is Cryme Tyme to interrupt his usual rant. They steal his head scarf (his “Durka Durka” according to JTG) and want $5 but Lance Cade and Trevor Murdoch cut him off this time. Instead, JTG steals Cade’s hat and Cryme Tyme runs off. The hat is tossed into the crowd and chants of MONEY MONEY, YEAH YEAH are on.

Randy Orton storms into Vince McMahon’s office and demands a rematch with John Cena. Vince says not so fast, because Orton has to earn it. Orton storm off.

Maria vs. Beth Phoenix

Or not as Beth jumps her during the entrance and the big beatdown is on. Maria can’t go so no match.

Candice Michelle isn’t scared of Beth Phoenix and will face any challenge. She also isn’t scared of Snitsky, who pops up behind her. Snitsky says it is a challenge for him to limit his destruction.

Vince McMahon is ready to find out his son and thinks he’ll learn the identity next week. William Regal comes in with some information but wants Coach gone before he’ll say anything. Vince says say what it is, with Regal saying that Shane, Stephanie and Linda will be here next weeks, with attorneys. Silent glaring ensues.

King Booker vs. John Cena

Non-title and Queen Sharmell is here too. Cena backs him into the corner to start but Booker comes back with some kicks tot he face. The fisherman’s suplex drops Booker back down and the armbar goes on. Booker has to bail to the ropes to get out of the STFU and we take a break.

Back with Cena making a comeback but Booker hits a spinwheel kick to take him down. Cena has to power out of a chinlock and grabs a spinebuster to plant Booker again. The side slam gives Booker two and he puts on a top wristlock. Cena comes up again so it’s a superkick to give Booker two more. Another comeback is loaded up but Randy Orton runs in to take Cena out for the DQ.

Rating: C. This didn’t have the most drama as it was a match built around waiting on Orton to come in and jump Cena. They didn’t exactly hide what they were going for earlier today and that isn’t a bad thing. I’m not entirely wild on having Cena face Orton against after beating him clean, but it’s not like the two of them have fought forever and ever or anything.

Post match Orton and Booker beat Cena down. Orton gets all serious and rolls outside, where he grabs Cena’s dad. The Punt leaves Cena Sr. laying to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. They had a bit of a weird show here, as it wasn’t so much about the show they were running but rather the shows that they were setting up. Next week will see all of the McMahons here and that should be the sign for a big step forward in the search for Vince’s son. Other than that, we’re on the way to Unforgiven and that should be a sold Summerslam rematch show. Overall, not a great show here, but the bigger stuff seems to have been officially put on standby.

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Smackdown
Date: February 4, 2022
Location: Paycom Center, Oklahoma City, Oklahoma
Commentators: Pat McAfee, Michael Cole

We’re done with the Royal Rumble and it’s time to get going on the Road to Wrestlemania. That is going to get going on this show with a pair of big talking points. First up, Paul Heyman will be explaining why he sided with Roman Reigns and Ronda Rousey might be announcing her Wrestlemania opponent. Let’s get to it.

Here is the Royal Rumble if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Brock Lesnar getting screwed out of the WWE Title at the Royal Rumble but then coming back to win the Royal Rumble later in the night. Then he announced that he will be challenging Roman Reigns for the Universal Title at Wrestlemania.

Here is the Bloodline to get things going, complete with a look at Reigns retaining the Universal Title over Seth Rollins at the Royal Rumble. Paul Heyman talks about how there was no plot or plan, because he made a huge mistake by telling Reigns what he thought. He felt that Reigns needed to be protected and he made a mistake. The Coronavirus picked the wrong human to infect and Heyman got Lesnar the WWE Title match. It would leave everyone where they needed to be…except for Heyman when it comes to Reigns.

On Lesnar’s first night as champion, he came to Smackdown and challenged Reigns to a title for title match at Wrestlemania. Heyman says Lesnar was as stupid as he looked because he was stuck with a happy Saskatchewan farmer who wants to take everyone to Suplex City. Then we got to the Royal Rumble, where the Goat slayed the Beast to save Heyman from having to say the same things over and over.

Heyman starts saying the catchphrase but says you will never hear it again. He now realizes the truth: Lesnar needs to be protected from Reigns. Then Reigns offered him the hand of the Bloodline, which is why Heyman handed over the title to smash Lesnar in the face with it. Now there will be no title for title match because Lesnar will acknowledge Roman Reigns, which Heyman demonstrates.

Heyman tells the fans to acknowledge the Tribal Chief…..and it’s Goldberg time. Goldberg comes to the ring and gets straight to the point with the challenge for Elimination Chamber. For the love of all things good and holy, PLEASE DO THE MATCH ALREADY! WWE has been threatening us with this stupid match for two years now so let them do it already and get it out of their system.

Ridge Holland vs. Ricochet

Sheamus and Cesaro are here too. Holland shoulders him down to start but Ricochet flips over him. Another dodge sends Holland outside but he avoids a charge and drops Ricochet face first onto the apron. Holland stops to say something to Sheamus though and it’s a Codebreaker to give Ricochet the pin at 1:50.

Cesaro/Ricochet vs. Ridge Holland/Sheamus

Joined in progress after a break (thankfully without needing to show someone coming out and making the match) with Sheamus hitting the forearms to Cesaro’s chest and then clotheslining him back in. Pat McAfee is holding the Shillelagh as Cesaro fights out of a chinlock and hands it back to Ricochet to pick up the pace.

A springboard forearm sets up a Lionsault for two as everything breaks down. Cesaro rolls Sheamus up for two but charges into a boot in the corner. A dropkick catches Sheamus with a dropkick on top but Holland tags himself in as Sheamus gets superplexed. Northern Grit finishes Cesaro at 2:54 to get his heat back after all of five minutes later.

Jimmy Uso vs. Erik

Preview of the Tag Team Title match at Elimination Chamber because this is how WWE hypes up tag team matches. Erik slips out of a fireman’s carry to start and blasts Jimmy with a knee to the face. Ivar and Jey get into it on the floor, leaving Jimmy to superkick Erik down. The Superfly Splash (with the We The Ones pose in the air) finishes for Jimmy at 1:14 to continue the fast matches and weird booking choices.

We look at Aliyah beating Natalya in three seconds a few weeks ago. Then Natalya beat her up for a DQ in a rematch.

Aliyah vs. Natalya

Aliyah brags about the 3:17 record winning time but gets picked up without much effort. Back up and Aliyah gets in a takedown for some right hands of her own. A Rey Mysterio sitout bulldog gets two, meaning it’s a shocked near fall face. Natalya hits the discus lariat and they head outside. This time Natalya beats her down for a good while, only to get sent into the barricade to give Aliyah the countout win at 2:22.

Here is the returning Drew McIntyre to say he is back. Before he can get very far, here is Happy Corbin for a distraction, but McIntyre pulls the sword out to stop a charging Madcap Moss. McIntyre wants to hear a funny joke about himself, with Moss saying that Wrestlemania is like a criminal who beats the charges: they both get off Scot-free. That earns him a Claymore (McIntyre: “Idiot.”) and McIntyre promises to make Corbin’s life h***.

Sami Zayn crashed the Jackass Forever premiere and got taken out by security. Johnny Knoxville even stabs him with an electric stick.

Zayn complains to Adam Pearce and Sonya Deville about letting that air on television. To calm him down, he gets his Intercontinental Title match in two weeks. Pearce: “Should we invite Johnny Knoxville?” Zayn leaves and it’s Natalya coming in, saying she wants Aliyah next week, pinfall or submission only, Dungeon Style. Deal.

Shinsuke Nakamura vs. Jinder Mahal

Championship Contenders match and Rick Boogs’ guitar doesn’t work so McAfee dances to the entrance music instead. Boogs and Shanky are here too and here is Sami Zayn to join commentary. Nakamura starts fast with the sliding German suplex but Kinshasa is countered into a fireman’s carry gutbuster for two. Mahal punches him down and we hit the chinlock. The Khallas is broken up and Nakamura kicks him in the face. Kinshasa finishes for Nakamura at 3:14.

Rating: C-. At least they seem to have dropped the idea of Mahal as a thing, which is good news for everyone. Zayn has a good chance of winning the title in two weeks, which will end one of the most under the radar six months reigns since Nakamura’s last under the radar six months reigns. This was your usually dull Mahal match, but that shouldn’t be a surprise these days.

We look at Sonya Deville eliminating Naomi from the Royal Rumble.

Naomi wants Sonya to face her in the ring in five minutes. Sonya says she’s busy so Naomi wants to do it next week. That won’t work either, because Naomi is getting a Smackdown Women’s Title match next week. Naomi doesn’t buy it but Adam Pearce says it’s for real.

Video on Goldberg.

Natalya goes to explain what Dungeon Style means to the bosses (which she couldn’t do when she was in the room with them earlier). Xia Li walks out of the office instead though and Natalya decides to do this later.

New Day vs. Los Lotharios

This is the result of New Day interrupting Los Lotharios’ Valentine’s Day photo shoot. Kofi sends Humberto into the corner to start and rolls him up for two. An Angel distraction lets Humberto get in a cheap shot from behind though and everything breaks down. Kofi gets kicked down and we take a break.

Back with Garza TAKING OFF HIS PANTS and kicking Kingston in the ribs. Angel gets two off a belly to back suplex but Kofi kicks a moonsault out of the air. The hot tag brings in Big E. to clean house, setting up a wheelbarrow suplex into a top rope bulldog from Kofi….for two as Humberto makes the save. Big E. misses the spear to the floor and gets moonsaulted from the top, setting up a Doomsday dropkick for two on Kofi. The Wing Clipper is broken up and it’s back to Big E. for the Midnight Hour and the pin at 9:43.

Rating: B-. This was a weird one as they did a big false finish which seemed to confuse commentary as well. If nothing else, it’s weird to debut a big move like that and then have it get two, but it was indeed a surprise twist. That being said, it would be nice if WWE did something new with New Day, as you can almost feel the Usos showdown coming.

Here are Charlotte and Sonya Deville for the Ronda Rousey Wrestlemania announcement. Deville says Rousey has picked Becky Lynch for Wrestlemania so Charlotte gets to pick her opponent. Charlotte mocks the idea of facing Ronda, who hasn’t done anything since she lost the title. So pick anyone for Wrestlemania because it doesn’t matter. She’ll pick Sasha Banks, who isn’t even here tonight.

Charlotte wishes Banks was here tonight because Wrestlemania will be the best and worst day of her life. She can come sign the contract….and here is Rousey to interrupt. Rousey won the Rumble and says she gets to pick who she faces at Wrestlemania. She didn’t fly into an ice storm with her baby for a chat though and now Charlotte gets to learn the family business of a beating.

Charlotte isn’t special, but she is first. Rousey will see her at Wrestlemania, so the match is on. Charlotte says the title is her baby and prettier than Rousey’s. The jacket comes off so Sonya tries to break it up and gets caught in the piper’s Pit. Rousey snaps the arm for a bonus. So the Becky vs. Rousey thing was a lie and Charlotte vs. Banks isn’t happening? Why bother mentioning them in the first place then?

Overall Rating: C-. The short wrestling was a bit weird this week but they are clearly starting to move towards Wrestlemania. Elimination Chamber still needs to get done as well though, and that makes for a bit of a weird schedule. I’m rather glad that they’re getting Goldberg vs. Reigns out of the way already, but it could make for a long two weeks on the way there. The rest of the show wasn’t great with very little in the way of quality wrestling, but now we should be cranking it up in the coming weeks.

Results
Ricochet b. Ridge Holland – Codebreaker
Ridge Holland/Sheamus b. Cesaro/Ricochet – Northern Grit to Cesaro
Jimmy Uso b. Erik – Superfly Splash
Aliyah b. Natalya via countout
Shinsuke Nakamura b. Jinder Mahal – Kinshasa
New Day b. Los Lotharios – Midnight Hour to Angel

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

AND

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