Today is a personal favorite: Hillbilly Jim.

After wrestling for years in Memphis, Jim was brought into the WWF as his most famous character. His introduction story saw him as a fan who wanted to wrestle and had a choice between Hulk Hogan and Roddy Piper to train him. He chose Hogan, cementing his status as a hero. We’ll start things up with one of his first matches in December 1984.

Terry Gibbs vs. Hillbilly Jim

Our first match starts in progress almost 12 minutes into the tape. Hogan is at ringside with him. Jim uses very basic stuff like stand there and let the smaller guy run into you. Basic offense from Gibbs who is a career jobber. Jim slams him and the bear hug ends it in less than two minutes. Yeah it’s one of those tapes.

His first major match was at the War to Settle the Score.

Hillbilly Jim vs. Rene Goulet

BIG pop for Jim. Andy Warhol is here as is Danny DeVito. Since this was shown later on the syndicated show, those cameos are awesome. Jim is wearing Hogan’s boots. Good thing they were the same size. Jim chases him away to start as we’re into stalling mode. Long headlock by Goulet which gets him nowhere. Jim does that chest out pose of his which is always fun. He’s a character that always would work because he wasn’t ever treated seriously. He would probably get over today if he was treated the same. Big old headlock by Jim as Goulet has nothing but that’s his job as a jobber.

Basically this is a long squash as Goulet can’t do much at all but gets in jobber offense to take some control. He bites Jim which just ticks the big old boy off. Very basic offense with the biggest move being a headbutt sets up the bearhug for the easy submission. Post match Goulet goes after some fan at ringside. That fan’s name: Mr. T. Guess how that goes for the jobber.

Rating: D. Like I said this was a very long squash at nearly eight minutes. The fans loved Jim though as he was just big and fun. What more can you ask of him than that really? The match was bad but the fans were way into it and that’s all that matters at the end of the day.

One of his first big feuds was with Jesse Ventura, including this match on Saturday Night’s Main Event IV.

Jesse Ventura/Roddy Piper/Bob Orton vs. Cousin Luke/Uncle Elmer/Hillbilly Jim

Jim is the most talented of the face hillbilly team. What does that tell you? Piper and Orton say funny things about the hillbillies. He was a total master on the mic in this era. The hillbillies say generic hillbilly stuff. The mat is dark gray and the ropes are mixed up, as in they go blue, red then white. It’s weirder than it sounds. Also, the ring looks TINY. Uncle Elmer and Ventura start. Elmer is REALLY fat.

Wow it’s odd hearing Heenan from this era. It really is. He’s a totally different commentator. He’s still his usual jerky self, but his voice sounds different to put it mildly. Luke…sucks. That’s all there is to it. I mean he sucks HARD. Naturally he gets beaten down for the majority of the match. Piper was still moving in the ring at this time and was far better at wrestling than he was given credit for.

Jesse’s wrestling was underrated. He knew how to sell and could work a crowd really well. Luke gets his head handed to him for a good while. We get the classic ref doesn’t see the tag spot which is one of the easiest ways in the world to get heat on someone. Piper beats up Uncle Elmer, who is like 6’7 and close to 500lbs on his own. It’s rather amusing. We get a melee and after a cast shot to Luke, Piper puts him to sleep to end a glorified squash.

Rating: D. Weak stuff here but like I said, I’d expect a lot of that. There was heat from the crowd, but when the third best in ring guy is Hillbilly Jim, it’s a bad sign. This just didn’t work and felt weak. Thankfully this ended the story between these guys as it really didn’t work all that well.

Time to team with Hulk on April 22, 1986.

Hillbilly Jim/Hulk Hogan vs. King Kong Bundy/Big John Studd

Studd and Jim to start. Is Hogan the smallest guy in this? Jim is recently back from a leg injury. This would be just after Mania 2 if the dates I can find are correct. Studd is still doing the $15,000 slam thing. Studd slams him instead and says he wants Hulk. Hogan is in white here which is odd indeed. Here’s Hogan and he gets his ass kicked with relative ease. This clearly should have been the Big John Studd set.

Hogan fights back and slams Studd and then Bundy with relative ease. Something tells me he won’t get his money. Everything breaks down and the good guys clean house with Hogan drilling Heenan. Hayes says Hogan is the first man to slam Studd. I give up. Things settle down and it’s Hogan vs. Studd. Off to Bundy who has some better success.

Ladd wants to talk about football and is completely ignored in a funny bit. Studd and Bundy work Hogan over and it’s a bearhug by Studd. Off to Bundy who is immovable apparently. If so, how is he moving? An elbow misses and it’s off to Jim again. He crushes Jim and we’re right where we were a minute ago but with more denim and Deliverance references this time

Gorilla says Hogan should come in to break up the chinlock but Al says Hogan won’t break the rules. And people make Superman jokes about Cena? Off to a bearhug by Studd to Jim which is relatively easily broken. Hot tag to Hogan, house is cleaned, a leg is dropped, but it’s broken up by Bundy and everything is thrown out for a big double DQ.

Rating: D+. Eh this was ok I guess but it’s the same thing you would see at any given house show in this era. That being said, the fans ate it up which is exactly the right idea since this was likely the main event. Nothing terrible, but nothing we haven’t seen a million times. Granted it was a simpler time.

Time for comedy, starting on November 24, 1986.

Don Muraco vs. Hillbilly Jim

Muraco is dressed like Piper and Fuji is with him in a tux. Remember that. Muraco is wrestling in the kilt. Jim rips it off quickly and the beating begins. Muraco is sent to the floor and Fuji’s hat got crushed. Muraco hides in the corner and Jim works on the arm. A headbutt puts Don on the floor. Muraco takes him down and it’s off to a nerve hold. Jim comes back and hits a big boot. Bear hug (called a full nelson by Monsoon for some reason) draws in Fuji for the DQ.

Rating: D. Jim was a fun character and this was designed to set up the next match and that’s all. Muraco was definitely on the downside of his career at this point but he still had a few more years on the top level to go. Fuji interfering directly sets up the next match on the tape which is always cool to see.

Fuji tears Jim’s overalls and hits him in the ribs with the cane a bunch of times. Jim challenges Fuji to a tuxedo match next month.

Hillbilly Jim vs. Mr. Fuji

This is a tuxedo match. It’s an evening gown match but for men. Jim rips the hat off immediately. I wouldn’t bet on this lasting long. They fight over tearing jackets off and Jim gets his shirt ripped. Jim tears out the pocket of Fuji’s jacket as does Fuji to Jim’s. Fuji steals the jacket and Jim is mad. Fuji’s jacket gets ripped so he kicks Jim low. Jim is topless now and as I type that Fuji is as well. And there go Fuji’s pants to end it. I’m not rating it because it’s not really much of a match but it was all in good fun.

Off to Toronto on March 15, 1987.

Hillbilly Jim vs. Dino Bravo

Both guys aren’t anything special but Jim was Hogan’s buddy so he’s of course over as all hell. I wouldn’t go messing with a country boy. He had been around about a year and a half at this point and his biggest feuds were behind him. That sums things up rather well for him. Oh and Bravo has brown hair and is wearing the same tights that Spivey was wearing earlier. Hart mentions his accomplishments in music including the tour with the Beach Boys. He really was a huge asset to Vince.

We’re almost four minutes in and I don’t think anything past a headlock has happened. Ah here we go as Bravo is actually doing some stuff. It’s boring as hell but he’s doing something at least. And there goes the referee. That’s good enough for the DQ. Scratch that. It’s bad enough for the DQ. Nothing good about this match.

Rating: F. Again, this is pure filler and it was bad filler at that. I want this show to end like NOW.

Here’s Jim’s most famous match at Wrestlemania III.

Hillbilly Jim/Little Beaver/Haiti Kid vs. King Kong Bundy/Lord Littlebrook/Little Tokyo

Beaver would be 52 and Littlebrook would be 58 at this point. Uecker jumps in on commentary. Haiti and Tokyo start before we get a four way crisscross. The good small guys hook a stupid looking hold called the rowboat on their evil counterparts and the crowd doesn’t seem interested. Off to Beaver as Uecker seems really happy to be here. Jesse wants to see Bundy crush one of these guys because that’s the kind of guy he is.

Littlebrook vs. Beaver at the moment but it’s quickly off to Bundy. Beaver and Haiti annoy him a bit until it’s off to Hillbilly for a nice ovation. Bundy gets dropped by a clothesline and an elbow drop allows Jim and company to pile on for a two. Jim gets caught in a front facelock but Beaver comes in and blasts Bundy in the face to get on his nerves again. Bundy finally grabs Beaver and crushes him with a slam and an elbow drop, drawing a DQ.

Rating: D+. This is another of those matches where you have to consider what they were going for. You’ve got two giants and four midgets out there with Hillbilly Jim picking up a 52 year old man so he can pull on Jim’s beard. How tough can I be on a match like this? Unfortunately Beaver’s back was hurt by Bundy in this and he had to retire.

Off to Philadelphia on December 5, 1987.

Hillbilly Jim vs. Dino Bravo

Frenchy Martin is Bravo’s new manager here. The fans actually tolerate Hillbilly at first before the boring chants start a minute or so in. Bravo hammers away but gets caught by a big boot and a headbutt to send him to the floor. Stalling results in a request for a test of strength. Hillbilly’s limited offense works away but he walks into a bad atomic drop to change the momentum again.

Bravo isn’t exactly a master of the repertoire either so this isn’t much of a match at the moment. Off to a chinlock as this power vs. power game continues. Crowd is dead as can be here. Bravo hammers away with his great variety of stomps. There’s Bravo’s side suplex which is usually his finisher but an elbow drop misses. Jim comes back and uses even more basic stuff, but goes after Frenchy. A knee to the back from Bravo ends it.

Rating: D-. Terrible match here so of course it got about 10 minutes. Who thought that was a good idea? They should be made to watch this match over and over again. Jim was a guy that was good for kids. Who thought he was a good idea to put in a match in PHILADELPHIA??? Terrible match and incredibly boring.

Time for the required Survivor Series match in 1988.

Team Mega Powers vs. Team Twin Towers

Hulk Hogan, Randy Savage, Koko B. Ware, Hillbilly Jim, Hercules

Big Bossman, Akeem, Ted DiBiase, Red Rooster, Haku

Savage is world champion and this is based on a tag team feud which would be blown off in a huge live match on February 3. Hogan comes out to his own theme music after his partners all used Savage’s. This is actually a plot point as the Mega Powers would explode because Savage thought Hogan was taking his spotlight. It’s a Wrestlemania rematch with Savage vs. DiBiase to start things off.

They knock each other down with DiBaise taking over in the corner. The champ comes back with right hands and a clothesline. Off to Hercules who is feuding with DiBiase as Ted had called Hercules a slave, prompting a face turn. Instead Herc gets the Red Rooster who doesn’t do well at all, which is the idea. Heenan said he could take anyone, even Rooster, to the top. Off to Koko who gets in a shot to Ware and it’s off to Akeem (One Man Gang).

Haku comes in with a chop but misses a legdrop and it’s back to Herc. I’m not sure why when you have Hogan and Savage on the apron but whatever. Now it’s off to Hogan and the place erupts. He takes Haku down and drops some elbows before bringing Hillbilly in for a quick main event opportunity. Akeem comes in and runs Jim over before bringing Rooster in. Even Gorilla found that stupid. Jim doesn’t do much to Rooster so here’s Koko instead.

Rooster rams Koko’s head into the buckle, but see, Koko is black so it doesn’t hurt. A missile dropkick gets two on Red and it’s off to Hogan. The big boot sets up Savage’s elbow and it’s 5-4. Hogan’s team has a massive in ring celebration while Bossman’s team hits the floor. Heenan rips into Rooster as we get Savage vs. Haku. Haku chokes on the ropes but Hogan makes a blind tag and, brace yourselves, actually loses a slugout!

Haku hits a nice dropkick but gets slammed down and it’s off to Herc. A suplex puts Hercules down and it’s off to Akeem. A splash misses and it’s off to Hillbilly who fires away with all he’s got. Jim’s big boot doesn’t take Akeem down and a clothesline floors Jim. The 747 (big splash) gets the pin and we’re tied up. Koko comes in and dropkicks Akeem in the back before wisely bringing in Hogan to do the heavy lifting.

Back to the world champ with a double ax to the head but they can’t knock Akeem down. Hercules pounds away a bit as does Koko with a dropkick only sending Akeem into the corner. Akeem shrugs it off and hits Koko once to take over. Off to Boss Man who hits his namesake slam to make it 4-3. It’s Hogan in now and this is the match everyone has been wanting to see.

Hogan pounds him into the corner and everyone left on Hogan’s team (Hogan, Savage, Hercules vs. Bossman, Akeem, DiBiase, Haku) gets in a shot. Hogan easily slams the then bigger Boss Man but he charges into a spinebuster. That looked really good too. Back to Akeem and the big men hit a double elbow to take Hulk down. Off to Haku who gets in some shots to the neck before tagging in Boss Man. I wonder why they’ve gone so long since having DiBiase in there.

Naturally as I say that he comes in and clotheslines Hogan down. A falling punch gets two but Hogan Hulks Up. Off to Hercules for some revenge and some hard clotheslines and punches. Virgil trips him up though and a school boy eliminates Hercules. It’s now 4-2 but Savage charges in and rolls up DiBiase to pin him within about ten seconds.

Haku comes in again but misses a headbutt, allowing Hogan to get the tag. Something like a superkick takes Hulk down and it’s back to Boss Man for some headbutts tot he back. Akeem comes in for his usual shots before it’s back to Haku again, who suplexes Hulk for two. It’s nerve hold time followed by the Boss Man Slam for no cover. Instead Boss Man goes up and misses a splash.

The hot tag brings in Savage who cleans house. Slick trips Randy up and things slow down again. Boss Man puts on a bearhug as Slick goes after Liz, grabbing her by the arm. Hulk makes the save and DRILLS Slick with a right hand. The Towers go to handcuff Hogan to the rope but Boss Man gets counted out in the process. Boss Man beats on Hogan with the nightstick and then goes to beat on Savage. Akeem helps with that, drawing a DQ for himself and getting us down to Hogan and Savage vs. Haku.

Hogan is still cuffed to the rope though so it’s basically a one on one match. Haku beats on Savage as the camera is on the Towers leaving. Slick has the keys and is taunting Hogan with them. Savage holds the rope and avoids a kick but there’s no Hogan to tag. Haku accidentally superkicks Slick and Liz raids his pocket to get the key. Hogan is freed and Haku hits a top rope splash for two. Hot tag to Hogan and since it’s 1988, you can fill in the ending for yourself.

Rating: C+. While not great, this was better than the previous match to be sure. This would be part of the Mega Powers Exploding, as Savage would be jealous of Hogan for getting the glory and not being there for him earlier in the match. It’s no classic or anything, but 80s Hogan is always fun.

Here’s a tag match from May 29, 1989.

Hillbilly Jim/Blue Blazer vs. Bad News Brown/Brooklyn Brawler

Those are quite the teams. Jim and the Blazer dance after the opening bell so we get a second bell for some reason. Blazer and Brawler get things going with Brawl actually taking Blazer (Owen Hart) to the mat. Back up and Blazer scores with a hiptoss and hammers away at the head. That’s not very heroic. Off to Jim who gets choked on the ropes but comes back with a bearhug to make Brawler squeal.

Brown comes in and hammers away with a headbutt putting Jim down. Back to Brawler for more choking but Jim cartwheels away from a backdrop attempt. A hot tag brings in Blazer, who is slammed down almost immediately. Brawler gets two off a backbreaker but walks into a quick belly to belly. Brown glares at his partner before tagging in and sidesteps a missile dropkick, setting up the Ghetto Blaster (enziguri) for the pin.

Rating: D+. Just a basic heroes vs. villains match with the villains actually getting the clean pin. Blazer wouldn’t do all that much around this time but was athletic enough to make his matches fun. Brown was a guy that would have been a huge star if he came around about ten years later.

Here’s one of Jim’s biggest matches ever at the Nassau Coliseum on June 10, 1989.

Andre the Giant vs. Hillbilly Jim

Jim lunges at Andre and scares him backwards, sending Andre into the ropes. He doesn’t follow up though and Andre chokes him down. Jim bails to the floor and gets his lucky horseshoe but it’s quickly taken away. The distraction works well enough that he can ax handle the Giant to his knees but a single chop freezes Jim in his tracks. A headbutt puts him down and it’s back to the choking. There’s a knee to the ribs for the same effect and we hit the bearhug. Jim whacks the ears to escape but the hold goes right back on.

The fans correctly describe this match as boring so Andre just crushes Jim in the corner. He drives in some shoulders but Hillbilly raises a knee. Haku comes out for support and gets in a few shots until Jim Duggan comes out for the save. Back in and Andre chokes a lot but Duggan nails him with the board. Hillbilly covers for two but Haku comes in for the DQ. I think he came in late actually as the kickout wasn’t shown and seemed late.

Rating: D. The fans were right that this was boring but again, why in the world would you put Hillbilly Jim at a show like this in New York? They actually might have lynched him if he had pinned Andre so the DQ was the smarter move. It’s not good or anything but these battles of the big men rarely are.

One more big match from SNME XXVI.

illbilly Jim vs. Earthquake

First of all, let it be known that Jim’s music is freaking amazing on all levels. Jim wasn’t much in the ring, but he wasn’t supposed to be. He was a gimmick character that worked as well as any ever has. Can you think of a single time that he didn’t get a pop and a half? He was just so ridiculously over because of nothing more than the clapping thing he would do.

Like I’ve said before, he found something that worked and he ran with it. I would almost guarantee that if he came back today as a guest host, he would get the roof blown off almost any arena in the country. The key thing to him was that he was never taken seriously. He wasn’t shoved down our throats as a major player ever and because of that we never got sick of him.

Look at Eugene. He was originally an awesome character that a lot of people marked out for. Then they put him in an 18 minute match with HHH at Summerslam, and to the shock of no one, he got booed out of the building. The point is, keep the comedy characters in the right place.

As for the match, it’s a 90 second squash as Hart distracts Hillbilly and Quake hits a corner splash and two earthquakes to end this. That’s how it should have been. As usual, Quake’s opponent is taken out on a stretcher. That more or less was his gimmick which was fine.

Rating: N/A. It’s far too short to grade, but it did its job so this would have been a positive rating.

We’ll wrap it up there as I think that describes Jim as well as anything else I could have said. Jim was the definition of a fun kids’ character and he was never supposed to be anything else. Putting him with Hogan at the beginning was the best way to get him over and he stayed the same kind of character for his entire run. I still like the guy and he’s about as innocent of a guy as you’ll ever find in wrestling.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today is someone a lot smarter than you: Lanny Poffo.

Poffo got started in 1975 after being trained by his father Angelo. We’ll look at a match from the All Star Championship Wrestling promotion out of Knoxville in 1979.

Lanny Poffo vs. George McCrary

Poffo is billed as being from Amarillo, Texas here. This is VERY old school with bad lighting and maybe fifty people in the audience. Poffo flips out of a chinlock and cranks on the arm as the lighting get so bad that I can barely see what’s going on. Some headlocks put George back on the mat and Poffo cranks on a kind of abdominal stretch. George drops a knee but Lanny hammers away with right hands and a short arm scissors.

Back up and Lanny jumps without doing anything else but it’s enough to send George running into the corner. Another knee to the face has Poffo in trouble but McCrary misses an elbow drop. Lanny slams him down for a slingshot splash for two before a bad looking dropkick puts George down. Back up and a quick sleeper gives Poffo the win.

Rating: D. Time has not been kind to the match or the film it was shot on. The match wasn’t the best but Poffo was still way ahead of anyone else out there at this point. He still needed some polishing as there were some botches in there, but for 1979 in Tennessee this was insane stuff.

The Poffos, including brother Randy, would start up International Championship Wrestling around Kentucky and Indiana. Here’s a match from their promotion in 1980.

Lanny Poffo vs. Rick Zarda

They actually shake hands to start and Zarda grabs a quick headlock. Poffo gets slammed a few times before a big dropkick puts Zarda down. A slingshot splash out of the corner gives Lanny a quick pin.

Off to the WWF now and we’ll start things off on July 13, 1985.

Terry Funk vs. Lanny Poffo

At the Garden here. Dang Terry Funk vs. Randy Poffo sounds awesome beyond belief for the promos alone if nothing else. I think they did some stuff in Memphis. Funk stalls to start. He chases a ring attendant who filed a legit lawsuit over something with the company at some point and it was a big deal. Sweet goodness that was vague but it’s all I’ve got.

Funk is considered a great here which is just weird to hear as he’s a legend now rather than simply an all time great. Red hot crowd here. Poffo does a standing backflip which is insane in its own right. He was so far ahead of his time it’s unreal. Based on what I can find this is July 12, 1985 if you’re interested. Terry sees Lanny prancing around and you know he’s not a fan of it.

The brawling vs. speed/agility stuff here is actually working. Funk gets a sweet leverage move to send him over the top. His wrestling ability was and always will be underrated. He shouts PIG at Poffo. As long as he doesn’t want to make him squeal like one I think were’ ok. Funk gets sent to the floor off an awesome atomic drop. Funk pounds away but falls to the floor again for some reason.

Terry suplexes him to the floor and Lanny is more or less dead. This guy took some of the best beatings I can ever remember. He looks a bit like a short haired version of Gorgeous Jimmy Garvin although he has, you know, talent. The crowd is getting into this and I can’t blame them as this has been solid. Funk shoves the referee before hitting a nice reverse neckbreaker for two.

SWEET sunset flip by Poffo for two but they mess up and ring the bell anyway. Poffo takes over and does some sweet fast paced stuff. He busts out a freaking moonsault which was INSANE in 85. Funk goes back to that old left hand again but gets caught in a hurricanrana of all things for two. And then Funk throws on a choke/sleeper for the submission/cure for insomnia.

Rating: B. This was REALLY good and I never would have guessed that. Poffo got a chance to throw out his insane offense which blew people away back then. Funk was his usual old hateful self and the whole thing just worked really well. Solid match here and a really nice surprise the whole way around.

Poffo would somehow get a Tag Team Title shot on the second SNME.

Tag Titles: Tony Garea/Lanny Poffo vs. Dream Team

Beefcake and Valentine in case you’re a young gun. This is the standard dominating first title defense on SNME where there was no chance of the titles changing hands. Only once did a title ever switch on this show and it wasn’t until 1989 when the Brain Busters beat Demolition in a shocker. Poffo, more famous as the Genius, busts out a moonsault which is a huge spot back in the day. I think he debuted it in the company but I’m not sure.

Poffo was a jobber to the stars and Garea used to be a tag champion way back in the day. The crowd is kind of dead here as this has been a long show but then again there was rarely anything of note at the end of these shows. I usually can’t stand the ads everywhere but I really want a Coke given that sign up there. The US Express, the former champions, are in the front row. Figure Four ends this glorified squash.

Rating: D. Nothing at all of note here but to say they weren’t shooting for a classic is an understatement. This was short and relatively painless as it’s only about three and a half minutes long. Nothing terrible here but boring for the most part. I still don’t get how two random guys can be the #1 contenders like this.

From June 14, 1986.

Harley Race vs. Lanny Poffo

Race is the “newcomer” here, although they openly say he’s wrestled for twenty years. Clipped to Poffo taking something like a brainbuster on the floor. The fans are quiet but this is the old Race, as in the old school style of him. Top rope headbutt (which Race is credited with inventing) puts Poffo down and a regular one puts him on the floor. Poffo starts his comeback and hits a flying headscissors to bring Race over the top and back in. Race gets him in a fireman’s carry and drops him throat first across the top rope to break up the comeback though. Fisherman’s suplex ends this. Not enough to grade but Race was his usual great self, even though the match was dull.

Back to Saturdays with SNME VII.

Kamala vs. Lanny Poffo

Ok what are you expecting with three minutes left in the show? It’s a total 80s squash, making it AWESOME.

Rating: B+. All for being quick and Kamala scaring the heck out of me back in the day.

Time for some Superstars matches, starting on February 14, 1987.

Bob Orton/Don Muraco vs. Leo Strohein/Lanny Poffo

Poffo has a poem, where he talks about Andre for no apparent reason. He even swears a bit. Ok then. He gets a pop if nothing else. Jesse talks about his face being insured by Lloyd’s of London. And now let’s hear from Hillbilly Jim, who talks about Hogan vs. Andre. Ok then. A move that we would call the Tombstone ends it. No attention was paid to this at all.

Rating: N/A. Just a squash here to get the heels to look good. Nothing over a minute and a half at best.

And on February 28.

Brutus Beefcake/Greg Valentine/Adrian Adonis vs. Rick Martel/Tom Zenk/Lanny Poffo

The heels have Johnny V, Jimmy Hart and Dino Bravo with them. Poffo does a REALLY bad poem. This is actually a big time main event for this show. Adrian isn’t afraid of Piper. They go back and forth here with like seven minutes left in the show. Wow this is actually getting some time.

It’s not very good, but it’s such a rarity on this show that I can’t complain a bit. Adrian gets a pair of scissors and accidently cuts Beefcake’s hair. It makes sense in context. In his shock, Beefcake gets rolled up for the pin. Oddly enough the “replay” is comprised of just still shots.

Rating: D. Not a great match by any stretch, but it set up Adonis getting his hair cut at Mania. Having this stuff, that makes sense all of a sudden.

And one more on March 21, 1987.

Lanny Poffo vs. Honky Tonk Man

Poffo was more or less the Santino of this time, as he would win a match every now and then but was mostly a comedy character. It’s about a minute long with a few quick shots but the Shake Rattle and Roll ends it.

Rating: N/A. Poffo’s offense was WAY ahead of its time in America if nothing else as he even had a moonsault back then, which was unheard of in WWF.

One more TV match from Wrestling Challenge, September 13, 1987.

Lanny Poffo vs. Ted DiBiase

DiBiase doesn’t like the poem (he was called a Million Dollar Jerk) and charges at Poffo, only to get dropkicked out to the floor. Back in and Poffo goes face first into the buckle and dropped by a knee to the ribs. Ted drops some elbows for two but pulls Poffo up. Instead he put on a spinning toe hold for a quick submission.

Here he is at Wrestlefest 1988.

Jim Neidhart vs. Lanny Poffo

This was when Poffo was still a leaper and threw out Frisbees with his poetry on them. He was the king of jobbers at this point though so if nothing else he’s not bad. I think his brother would be up next. He uses a moonsault which misses but was a big spot back then as he was the first WWF guy to use it I believe. I think Jim is a heel here but it’s not entirely clear. The crowd is totally dead here. After just beating the tar out of Poffo a powerslam ends it.

Rating: N/A. Total squash here. I think they were toying with splitting up the Harts but that wouldn’t happen for nearly three more years, resulting in Bret breaking out on his own and then Neidhart kind of fading away, although doing so in a positive way. Thank goodness they picked Bret to push instead of Neidhart.

Poffo would be repackaged as the Genius and put with Mr. Perfect. Here he is in a big match at SNME XXIV.

WWF Title: Hulk Hogan vs. The Genius

Genius kind of prances around and this is definitely going to be a comedy match. He even uses a nip up which just wasn’t done back then. All Hogan here and Genius stops to write something on his scroll. He was incredibly athletic and skins the cat to get back in. And then Genius slaps Hogan in the face. Hogan gets tired of Genius doing his stuff and takes his head off with a clothesline.

Hogan is killing him now and then prances around the ring. Like him or not, the guy knew how to play to a crowd like no one else in history could. And here’s Mr. Perfect to mess everything up. He looks at the belt and says it’s not perfect and puts gum on it. Hogan gets posted and back in the ring a moonsault gets two. He Hulks Up and Genius goes to the floor. Perfect clocks Hogan with the belt and GENIUS WINS! THE GENIUS BEAT HOGAN! WITH THE TITLE ON THE LINE! Perfect runs away with the title in hand.

Rating: B-. Total comedy match that set up Hogan vs. Perfect for a few months if nothing else. This wasn’t supposed to be a serious match and you flat out can’t grade it as one. This was a hilarious match at times as someone for once tried to outsmart Hogan and it worked like a charm. This was perfectly played and while the match was nothing, the comedy and thinking was great. I liked this a lot but most people wouldn’t.

Time to fight Hogan’s buddy at Royal Rumble 1990.

The Genius vs. Brutus Beefcake

If you’re not familiar with Genius, think Damien Sandow if he read WWF themed poetry. Oh and he’s a jobber. And Macho Man’s real life brother. Genius offers a left-handed handshake but Brutus isn’t interested. Jesse gets on Tony about Genius beating Hogan via countout on SNME. Tony: “Well…..” Jesse: “WHO WON THE MATCH???” Genius heads to the floor for a cartwheel and we finally get the first lockup.

We get a clean break and Beefcake tells Genius what he can kiss. They lock up again and Genius goes to the eyes to get the first advantage. Beefcake comes out with an atomic drop and Genius gets to do his way overdone selling. I miss that. Back in and Genius fires off some shockingly good punches so Brutus comes back with an even bigger punch. Expect to hear the word punch a lot in this match.

Beefcake steps on Genius’ fingers like a total jerk and crotches Genius on the top rope. Half of Beefcake’s taunts would get him fired today for suggesting that Genius is effeminate. We go back to the standard story of the match: Genius gets in some strikes, Brutus hits him once to take over again. A dropkick gets two for Genius as does a rollup, but Brutus catches him coming off the middle rope with a punch to the ribs.

There’s the sleeper but Genius quickly escapes. Another sleeper attempt is quickly countered, but the Genius is knocked into the referee. Ref bumps weren’t cliched back in the 80s, so this is kind of a big development. Anyway the sleeper goes on again and Genius is going down quickly. Brutus puts him out and starts cutting his hair, but Genius’ buddy Mr. Perfect comes out for the save and the DQ.

Rating: D. This is one of those matches that was bad but it was energetic. For as much of a mess as Brutus would become in real life, the guy could get the fans fired up. That’s pretty impressive as he was almost all punching and a sleeper. This was pretty lame stuff but the fans loved it which is the right idea.

Here’s a big tag match from SNME XXV.

Genius/Mr. Perfect vs. Hulk Hogan/Ultimate Warrior

We get a shot of Warrior and Hogan colliding at the Rumble which indeed was an epic moment. Tony Schiavone talking about WWF wrestling is still odd as all all goodness. Heenan was at ringside here for no apparent reason. Never noticed that before. Warrior and Hogan say exactly what you would expect them to say before the match.

Perfect and Hogan start us out and Jesse breaks this down and compares it to the Super Bowl which makes a bit of sense. It’s all faces as you would expect at this point. Perfect always was a great bumper. Hogan starts beating the tar out of Perfect and Genius is writing a poem. Ok then.

Perfect gets the scroll and you know what’s coming. Hogan takes it in the head to take control for the heels. More or less this is Hogan getting beaten up by Perfect while Genius won’t stay in for more than 30 seconds.

He’s a gay character that they never said was gay. Perfect gets the Perfectplex and lets him up at two so Genius can get the pin. You know what’s coming next. Warrior cleans house and gets the press slam on Genius as Hogan tags himself in.

He messes up the leg drop as he uses the far leg over the throat, so it looked like Kofi’s Boom Drop. It gets the pin anyway though. Warrior beats up both heels but hits Hogan by mistake. The major showdown happens and we have Mania 6.

Rating: C-. Not great at all but it could have been far worse. This was all to set up the main event of Mania and that worked fine. Hogan and Perfect feuded a ton on the house show circuit but they never had the big match that they should have. Those Hogan/Warrior showdowns were amazing though.

One more big match before Genius became a manager. From February 19, 1990.

Hulk Hogan/Brutus Beefcake vs. The Genius/Mr. Perfect

Ok so at least we’re at the final of the tape. Naturally Hogan is world champion here but the Warrior was coming. MSG again here, likely the same show as it’s been all tape. The heels jump them as they come in. Heenan and Gorilla are on commentary here so we should get some funny lines.

Beefcake had cut Genius’ hair recently so his head is a comedy point. Hogan vs. Perfect to start us off. Heel shenanigans give Perfect the advantage but the powers of Hulkamania switches that around a bit. Off to Beefcake who beats up both guys with ease. Headknocker to Perfect and a right hand get two. The champion comes back in and the beating continues.

Lot of quick tags from Hogan and Beefcake. High knee gets two for Beefcake. It’s weird to see Perfect get beaten down this much. Perfect may be bleeding from the nose. Finally Perfect gets a shot from the scroll to the head of Hogan and Hulk is in trouble. Genius comes in and prances around a lot. The moonsault gets knees though and Hogan gets the tag.

Brutus hammers away on Perfect and gets the Sleeper. Hogan runs interference but when Hebener is trying to get him out of the ring Genius gets a shot with the scroll and runs away. Ah there he is again. Old school tag team tactics where the referee misses the hot tag are still awesome.

Genius and Perfect hammer away on Brutus with Genius getting in Hogan’s face. Perfectplex gets two since Hogan makes the save. Genius tries to make the stop but here’s Hogan. I think you know the drill as it’s Hogan in the 80s in MSG in the main event. What do you think is going to happen here? Genius is the victim if you’re curious. More hair is cut post match.

Rating: C-. Not much here but it would have been fine as the main event of a house show. Hogan vs. Perfect was a big and long running feud on the house show circuit at this time and would continue once Hogan lost the title. Nothing too bad here but it’s nothing that was unpredictable at all. Decent enough though.

Poffo is a guy who is overlooked because of his brother and that’s kind of a shame. Between the poetry and the outfits and wearing a suit of armor for a string of battle royals back in the 80s (seriously), the guy would try different stuff and get it over. Look at the intellectual version of Damien Sandow for a modern comparison. Don’t you just want to punch him in the face? That’s a good quality to have and the ability to do a moonsault didn’t hut either.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today we’re looking at the whipping boy of the Horsemen: Paul Roma.

Roma got started in 1985. We’ll pick things up on the first episode of Superstars, September 6, 1986.

Hart Foundation vs. Koko B. Ware/Paul Roma

This is Koko’s debut. It’s also Ventura’s first appearance since Wrestlemania too. Neidhart and Koko start things off and Koko armdrags him down. Off to Roma who doesn’t have as much luck because he isn’t that good. Bret, who is that good, comes in and pounds him down with ease. Ventura praises him and we get an inset promo from Koko who has nothing to say. While he’s talking the Hart Attack pins Roma. Vince calls it bad officiating but it seemed fine to me.

Roma was best known for his tag matches, including this one on June 14, 1987.

Jim Powers/Paul Roma vs. The Islanders

Powers/Roma would eventually get the name The Young Stallions and become more or less the face jobbing team. The Islanders are now heel as this is about three months later. Still in the Garden here. The beginning of this is clipped to Roma having an armbar on Tama. Oh and Heenan is managing the Islanders now. Haku’s athleticism is underrated badly. Headbutt misses and here comes Roma.

And never mind as Tama trips him from the floor and it’s back to the Islanders. Sunset flip gets Roma hit in the face for his troubles. Off to the nerve hold which Monsoon says is effective due to the martial arts background or something like that. Roma is destroyed for a good while here as we’re filling in time for the most part. Jumping back elbow by Tama gets two.

Superkick by Haku gets two as well. Roma gets a jawbreaker to break the momentum but can’t make the tag. Haku misses a front flip splash and there’s the tag finally. Powers cleans house but somehow messes up a backdrop. Tama landed on Powers’ feet if that makes sense. Anyway it breaks down again and a backbreaker by Haku sets up a top rope splash to end Powers.

Rating: D. Pretty weak match here with Powers being in there a minute combined. Granted the clipping likely had something to do with that. Anyway, weak match from two teams that never really were anything special. I’d like to see more of Tama, but that simply didn’t happen.

The Young Stallions would appear on Saturday Night’s Main Event XII.

Tag Titles: Young Stallions vs. Hart Foundation

The Stallions are Paul Roma and Jim Powers. They never really got above jobber status so there you are. This is a glorified squash and is mostly about Brain making fun of the Stallions and saying how they could be good with him as their manager but they suck otherwise.

Powers hits a leap frog and either gets hurt or is great at selling his back and I’m not sure which it is. I’m betting on selling. We get the “new champions momentarily” line which seals the retaining of the belts. And all of a sudden Roma takes the Hart Attack. I didn’t even seen how that happened. Literally 2 seconds later we’re talking to Hogan and Savage.

Rating: D. Just a very fast match to say there was a title defense. Strike Force would get the belts off the Harts in like 3 weeks and hold them until Mania. The Stallions never were worth much at all and this is a fine example of it. They were good for spots like this though and that’s a good role for them.

The team would be involved in the tag team Survivor Series match in 1987.

Team Hart Foundation vs. Team Strike Force

Hart Foundation, Bolsheviks, Demolition, Dream Team, Islanders

Strike Force, British Bulldogs, Killer Bees, Young Stallions, Fabulous Rougeaus

The rules here are that if one member of a team is eliminated, both members are out so it’s still just five eliminations needed. Strike Force recently stunned the Harts for the titles. I think you should know every team here. The Dream Team is Greg Valentine and Dino Bravo and the Stallions are Jim Powers and Paul Roma. I’m a big Strike Force fan so it’s good to see the fans pop loudly for them.

I’ve seen this show many times as it was one of my favorite tapes but I’ve never figured something out: for this and the main event, the lights are turned down. Why would that be the case? It’s clearly darker in the arena now and it’s not a dome with sunlight coming in or anything. I’ve never gotten that. Volkoff and Martel start things off. There are so many people on the apron that you can’t see most of the ring from a standard camera shot.

Volkoff powers him down to start before bringing in Zhukov. Since Zhukov is pretty much worthless, Martel beats him up and brings in Santana for the forearm out of nowhere for the quick pin. Santana’s reward for the pin: he gets to fight Ax. Ax does his pounding but knocks Tito into the corner and it’s off to Jacques Rougeau who speeds things up with a jumping back elbow to take over.

Dino Bravo comes in and the good guys start speeding up their tags. I’m sorry for all of the play by play in this but when you have 18 guys in a match there isn’t much room for analysis or anything else. After Bravo gets beaten up by about five different guys we wind up with Smash vs. Dynamite and the Bulldog (Dynamite) gets caught in the heel corner. Well actually it would be the heel side of the ring because they don’t all fit in one corner but corner sounds better.

Off to Haku and they chop it out before Dynamite tags in a Killer Bee who tags in the other Killer Bee. Neidhart comes in and gets his legs stretched by Brunzell and Roma. Back to Smash and then Ax who beat on the (somehow) future Horseman. I’m not listing a lot of the tags as there are probably five of them a minute and there’s no point in listing off stuff like “Ax comes in and hits Roma once before tagging back out.”

Roma tags in Powers who gets beaten down just as fast as Roma did, so it’s off to Jacques again. Not that it matters much as Jacques misses a cross body and Smash gets a quick pin. That’s good as we’re now down to sixteen guys left in the match. Off to Dynamite vs. Tama but Powers comes in, only to hesitate and gets his head taken off by a clothesline. Neidhart comes in and puts him in an over the shoulder powerbomb position as Haku drops a double ax (is there a single ax?) to the chest.

Off to Roman who gets beaten up by Ax and then Valentine. The Stallions are jobbers for all intents and purposes but they were great at selling so there was a point to having them around. Bravo comes in and hits a gutwrench suplex for two. Roma crawls over and brings in a Killer Bee who tags out to Dynamite almost immediately to face Smash. Smash fires off something similar to Sheamus’ ten forearms but shoves the referee, drawing the DQ to knock out Demolition. Notice that they kept Demolition VERY strong here and didn’t let them get pinned.

Bret immediately comes in and piledrives Dynamite for only two. Jesse immediately starts singing Bret’s praises as he was known to do. Bret misses a charge and hits the post shoulder first and it’s off to Powers again to face Tama. Tama misses a Vader Bomb and there’s the tag to Martel. Rick cleans house but when he puts the Boston Crab on he’s too close to the ropes and Neidhart gets a tag.

Rick gets away enough to bring in Santana who hits the forearm almost immediately for two. The saving shot to the back of Santana’s head by Bret is enough for Neidhart to get a pin and eliminate the champions. To recap, we have the Harts, the Dream Team and the Islanders vs. the Bulldogs, the Stallions and the Bees. At least now things can slow down a lot. Haku hits a HIGH dropkick on Powers as Jesse talks about his great great grandfather coming over on the Mayflower.

Valentine comes in and does Arn Anderson’s jump in the air and get crotched spot. Anvil (Neidhart for you schmucks out there) comes in and hot shots Powers followed by a superkick from Haku. Off to Valentine who has his suplex countered but still blocks the tag by bringing in Hitman. Bret suplexes Powers but Roma is still able to get the tag somehow. Back to Valentine who comes off the middle rope with a shot to the back for two.

In something you rarely see, Bret whips Roma into the ropes and knocks Valentine off the apron. Bret misses a dropkick and there’s the tag to Dynamite. A belly to back gets two for the Kid and it’s off to Roma which is a pretty questionable move given the beating he’s taken. Off to Haku vs. Blair as Roma was only in for a few seconds. Davey comes in and it’s power vs. power. Make that power vs. Powers but Jim misses a corner charge and Haku tags Anvil.

Powers dives away from Bret and it’s time for Davey Boy vs. Bret in a Summerslam 92 preview. Davey uses a perfect gorilla press on Hart and hits the powerslam for two on Haku. Dynamite tries a middle rope headbutt (notice all the similarities between Dynamite and Benoit. Benoit basically cloned himself after Dynamite) on Haku but knocks himself silly, allowing Haku to superkick him for the elimination.

It’s 3-2 now and Roma immediately charges in with a dropkick for two. Off to Bravo who misses an elbow and it’s off to Powers. Why won’t they tag the Bees already? Valentine Hammers away on Powers as do both Harts. Valentine comes in for a second before handing it off to Bravo again. Dino hits his side suplex but tags off to Valentine for the Figure Four, which is countered by a kick to the back. Off to Roma who sunset flips Valentine off the top to make it 2-2 (Stallions/Bees vs. Islanders/Harts).

The Bees double team Anvil in a match that by their own words probably happened 300 times over the years. Brunzell hits a high knee to the face for two and it’s off to Bret who does about as well. Tama comes in and takes out Roma and it’s off to Haku. Haku misses a legdrop and it’s back to Brunzell. Brunzell hiptosses him into the heel corner for some reason and Bret comes back in. Roma gets two off a middle rope fist but Hart comes right back with a belly to back suplex.

The Islanders hit a double headbutt and this referee counts SLOW. Haku pounds on Roma and hits a dropkick which is rather impressive for a guy his size. It’s not quite as impressive as Anvil doing a dropkick of his own (literally 2 seconds after Monsoon says he’d like to see Neidhart try one) though. Bret comes back in and Roma slides between Bret’s legs and tags in Brunzell.

Brunzell tries to slam Hart but Tama dropkicks Bret’s back. Brunzell rolls through and gets a fast pin to eliminate the Harts and get us down to 2-1. Tama hooks a nerve hold on Brunzell followed by a shoulderbreaker from Haku. That gets two so Haku puts on a nerve hold of his own. Now Tama puts on ANOTHER nerve hold. To be fair we’re over half an hour into this so the guys are likely getting tired.

Brunzell tries a sunset flip but there’s no strength in it at all and he only gets two. He FINALLY gets a tag off to Powers who tags in Roma for a powerslam for two. Things start to break down a bit and the Bees being in the ring allow the Islanders to double team Roma a bit. Roma escapes enough to tag Blair but Tama kicks him before Blair can even get in. Tama misses an elbow and it’s off to Brunzell again for some reason. He can barely get Tama over for a backdrop but the signature dropkick gets two. Everything breaks down and Blair puts on his mask (it was a thing the Bees did to cheat) and sunset flips Tama for the pin.

Rating: C-. This match just kept going on and on and it was kind of exhausting to sit through. It runs nearly forty minutes and by the end there were no combinations we hadn’t seen already. You could easily cut out fifteen minutes of this match and it would have improved greatly. If you like tag wrestling, find a copy of this NOW but otherwise be ready to fast forward a lot. It’s not a bad match or anything but man alive is it long.

They would main event the first Royal Rumble.

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Another 2/3 falls match here just to fill in the final part of the show. The Islanders have recently kidnapped Matilda and are recently back off suspension for returning the dog. Tama and Powers (It’s Haku/Tama vs. Jim Powers/Paul Roma) start things off and no one can get a real advantage in the early going. The Stallions beat on Tama a bit, with shots to the head for some reason, before it’s Haku in off the tag.

A cross body gets two for Roma and the Stallions work on the arm for awhile. Off to Tama who gets in like one shot before we cut to a camera angle from over the announcers shoulders. That’s a new one. Powers gets caught by a double headbutt and Haku hammers away on him some more. This continues to go nowhere so I think out of boredom it’s off to Roma vs. Tama.

Roma dropkicks Tama down but Haku low bridges Roma, sending him to the floor and injuring the knee. That’s good enough for a countout for the first fall and the Stallions take Roma to the dressing room to get his knee looked at. In other words, we need a reason to show the contract signing again and let Andre talk a bit. Just like Hogan, Andre doesn’t have much to say but it hypes up the Main Event.

Back to the match after the promo, the recap and a pair of breaks and it’s basically Powers in a handicap match now. You can see big gaps of seats where fans have left. For this one, I can’t say I blame them. Powers dropkicks him down and we hear about Giant-A-Mania from Jesse. Off to Tama who pounds away even more and kicks out of a small package at two. Tama’s jumping back elbow takes Powers down and it’s a little Samoan trash talk for good measure. Haku’s dropkick gets two and there’s a gutwrench suplex for two more.

It’s off to an abdominal stretch but Powers finally hiptosses out of it to get a breather. Haku misses a splash and things slow down again, but there’s no one for Powers to tag because of Roma’s knee injury. Roma finally tags himself in and Haku casually kicks the leg out to take over. Jesse wishes that was Vince’s knee because that’s the kind of guy he is. Tama puts on a half crab and the referee stops it.

Rating: D. This match is a victim of its spot on the card. The problem here is that everything else is done and this was the textbook definition of filler. It’s hard to care about something like this when there’s no story and no interest in this match, and on top of that it wasn’t even anything decent. This is one of those matches though where you can’t blame a lot of the problems on the wrestlers.

Another one off match on November 12, 1988.

Brain Busters vs. Young Stallions

In Toronto here I think. You could always tell as the camera was always off to the side a bit. There’s no Heenan here, although Gorilla says he might be in the upper deck in drag. That wouldn’t shock me actually. Arn and I think Powers start us off here and it’s a big brawl, won by the Stallions. Back to Tully vs. Powers and Blanchard isn’t sure what to do with him. Nice dropkick by Roma puts him down.

Off to Anderson who should be in the Hall of Fame. Roma (a future Horseman for some reason) snaps off some dropkicks and the Stallions rule the ring again. Blanchard tries to speed things up and that goes as well as anything else he’s tried. The Stallions work on Tully’s leg as this has been one sided so far. Anderson finally realizes he’s a Horseman and comes in with some double teaming to take over.

There’s a spinebuster which didn’t have a name yet. Roma gets beaten down like he’s a glorified jobber and Gorilla complains about the lack of perfection in the abdominal stretch. We get into a standard tag match with Roma being beaten down for awhile. Arn does his “test of strength on the mat and jump onto the other guys’ feet to crotch myself” spot. Blanchard gets taken down also and there’s the double tag. Everything breaks down and during the insanity, Tully cheats (atta boy!) and gets an illegal pin via a sunset flip on Powers.

Rating: C+. Fine match here and the 80s style never fails. It’s not a great match or anything but for a house show match that got about 12 minutes, it’s hard to complain about something like this. The Busters would get the titles later that year and would hold them until Tully got a little bit too high one day.

Roma had a worthless singles run in 1989 so it was off to another tag team with Hercules as Power and Glory. From Summerslam 1990.

Rockers vs. Power and Glory

Power and Glory (Hercules and Paul Roma) get a jobber entrance. The camera immediately goes wide during the opening brawl so you don’t see Shawn’s knee get grazed by Hercules’ chain. His knee was REALLY badly hurt at this time so he’s just here for an appearance, making this a handicap match for all intents and purposes. Marty hits a quick dropkick to both guys and gets a small package on Roma but Slick has the referee.

Vince is freaking out over the referee missing stuff as Marty clotheslines Herc to the outside. We officially start with Roma vs. Jannetty and Roma tagging his way out of a sunset flip. Shawn is still on the floor as Hercules pounds away and slams Marty down. Roma plants Jannetty with a backbreaker for two but Marty comes back with a powerslam. The top rope fist connects with Paul’s head but Hercules breaks up the pin. Roma sends Jannetty into a clothesline from Herc as Shawn is screaming in pain. The superplex/top rope splash combo is enough to finish the massacre of Jannetty.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t too bad all things considered. The crowd is white hot here and they carried the match to a higher level than it could have reached on their own. It’s kind of a shame that Marty had to be Shawn’s partner as his own skills were overlooked by his far more talented partner.

Here’s a singles match from September 21, 1990.

Marty Jannetty vs. Paul Roma

So it’s a drug addict vs. a guy that is a running joke in wrestling. Oh dear. Back at MSG again. This is a result of an injury angel where Power and Glory, Roma’s team, injured Shawn who had a legit knee problem. Marty is sent to the floor in a leverage move and may have hurt his wrist. This is in MSG. Roma takes over to start and sends Jannetty to the floor. Hercules keeps distracting Marty to let Roma take over.

Back in Marty can’t quite get a sunset flip as Roma tries a punch which also misses. They’re moving pretty quickly out there. Roma takes over and slows it down, hitting two backbreakers and a powerslam for no cover. This referee, Joey Marella (the son of Gorilla and whose last name was the inspiration for Santino’s last name) counts very slow. Off to the chinlock as some fans think this is boring.

Hayes has decided that Roma is going to win, more or less handing the win over to Jannetty already. Jannetty tries to do an inside out twist off a clothesline but he can’t quite get there. Off to another chinlock as I wonder how Roma got to be a Horsemen. I mean really dude? Was Virgil not available? He was a more interesting character to be sure and probably better in the ring.

Apparently before this match Power and Glory flipped a coin to decide who would face Jannetty here. Is there a reason we didn’t see that? Oh ok we needed more Sean Mooney plane jokes! Roma works on the back a bit and we’re back to the chinlock for the third time in this match. Anyone else thing it was a bad idea to have Roma get this much time?

Marty fights back and gets a suplex. They slug it out and Marty speeds things up a bit. Jannetty gets some basic offense in and adds a head grab/bulldog from the middle rope (think the bulldog Jericho uses to set up the Lionsault) which Roma flips forward with for some reason. Top rope punch looks to finish but Hercules interferes. Somehow that isn’t a DQ so Roma gets the pin with Herc helping him.

Rating: D. Weak match here that went WAY too long. Roma isn’t a guy that I want to see wrestle as he’s not bad but just boring beyond belief. I’d be annoyed if I were there live and had to sit through that. Weak match from a feud that never really got any kind of blowoff of note.

Roma would be in the 1990 Survivor Series.

The Vipers vs. The Visionaries

Jake Roberts, Rockers, Jimmy Snuka

Rick Martel, Warlord, Power and Glory

Power and Glroy are Hercules and Paul Roma. This is built around Martel vs. Roberts, which is based on Martel blinding Jake with cologne and Jake not having full vision yet. This was a BIG feud which they screwed up with a horrible match at Wrestlemania. It wasn’t that the wrestling was bad, but that it was a blindfold match and they spent about 2 minutes in contact with each other.

Marty and Warlord start as Piper is singing I Am The Walrus. Warlord powers Marty around but misses a charge in the corner. For those of you unfamiliar with Warlord, imagine Chris Masters but paler, bald, and even dumber. Both Rockers try to outmaneuver him but it just results in bringing in Martel. Shawn handles him with ease and brings in Jake, causing Martel to scamper away.

It’s Roma instead and Jake picks him apart like he’s not even there. He works on Roma’s arm and brings in Snuka to keep it up, but the afro apparently weighs down Snuka’s brain to the point where he can’t maintain a wristlock. Off to Hercules who gets chopped down so it’s off to Warlord instead. Snuka tries his stuff but when that gets nowhere it’s off to Marty. Jannetty tries his speed stuff but jumps into a great looking powerslam for the pin.

Off to Shawn whose leapfrog is caught but he ranas Warlord down instead. Jake comes in and the fans wants a DDT. A bunch of clotheslines take Warlord down and it’s back to Shawn. Roma comes in with an elbow drop to the back of the head as Gorilla talks anatomy. Warlord comes in and backdrops Shawn before tagging out to Herc. Martel comes in just as fast and drops a knee for two. Roma sends Shawn into the corner and Shawn of course sells it like he’s dead. Martel’s shoulder hits the post and here’s Snuka again.

A flying headbutt to the standing Martel gets two, but Rick grabs a small package for the pin out of nowhere. Jake comes in again and Martel immediately runs and brings in Hercules. Roberts is getting frustrated because he can’t get his hands on Martel, but he still manages a knee lift and a failed DDT attempt. Jake starts pounding away on Herc and Martel clotheslines him down out of nowhere.

Roma comes in for some stomping but he misses a middle rope punch. There’s the hot tag to Shawn who suplexes Roma down and hits a middle rope elbow for two. Shawn does what he can but Hercules comes in off a blind tag and pounds away even more. Power and Glory hook up the Powerplex (superplex from Herc immediately followed by a top rope splash from Roma) eliminates Shawn and it’s 4-1. It’s Hercules in first but Jake is in trouble. Warlord comes in with a bearhug but Jake escapes and DDTs him out of nowhere. Jake says screw it and gets the snake out. He chases Martel to the back for the countout loss.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t much to see here but other than Jake vs. Martel, there was nothing here at all. To the best of my knowledge, Warlord and Snuka never interacted at all before or after this so they were just tacked on. The Rockers and Power and Glory had fought at Summerslam but that’s about it. The Visionaries are the first ever team to survive intact.

Here they are against the most dominant tag team ever at Wrestlemania VII.

Power and Glory vs. Legion of Doom

Hercules is sent to the floor and it’s a Doomsday Device to end Roma in less than a minute. They were clearly coming for the belts very soon.

One more WWF match at Summerslam 1991.

Ricky Steamboat/British Bulldog/Texas Tornado vs. Warlord/Power and Glory

Steamboat is just The Dragon here, complete with what looks like a lizard man costume and breathing fire. The heels get the jobber entrance and have Slick with them. Steamboat and Roma get things going as Gorilla is listing off the rest of the card. Roma slams him down and mostly misses a dropkick before posing. Paul goes to the middle rope but dives into the armdrag and Steamboat cranks on the arm even more. Ricky hits a much better dropkick to put Roma in the corner for a tag to Hercules who gets caught in some armdrags of his own.

Off to Tornado and the fans go nuts as he rams Herc’s head into the buckle. Ten right hands to the head in the corner have Hercules in even more trouble but it’s off to Warlord vs. Bulldog which was a decent power feud. Bulldog hits the suplex for two and it’s off to Steamboat for a top rope chop to the head. Warlord blocks a monkey flip though and it’s back to Roma with a suplex of his own for two. Three straight backbreakers have Steamboat in even more trouble before it’s back to Hercules for a gorilla press.

Steamboat starts fighting back but gets caught in a big hotshot to put him down. Here’s Warlord again but he dives into two feet from Steamboat, allowing for the tag off to Tornado. The Texan cleans house but makes a blind tag to Bulldog who hits a cross body. That plus the Tornado Punch to Warlord is good for two as everything breaks down. Bulldog powerslams Roma down and Ssteamboat adds the high cross body for the pin.

Rating: C+. Nothing wrong with this as it was a basic six man tag to fire up the crowd. Everyone looked fine and the crowd was WAY into the smark god known as Ricky Steamboat. The heels were all about to be gone from the company with only Warlord making it to 1992.

Roma would head to WCW in 1993, somehow becoming a Horsemen. Here he is with Arn Anderson at Beach Blast 1993.

WCW Tag Titles: Hollywood Blondes vs. Paul Roma/Arn Anderson

Oh dang it it’s Paul Roma. This is your really long wrestling match that isn’t as good as it’s made out to be but is still pretty good but needs about 10 minutes cut off to really make it good match of the night. The Blondes, the heels here, stall to start. The Horsemen are of course the over team as they’re in the Deep South. Good night could Roma be more outclassed?

We have perhaps the best wrestler to never win a world title, the best American cruiserweight ever, and the second biggest star of all time. Then we have Paul Roma. There’s something amusing about that. How in the world did he get a spot in the freaking HORSEMEN??? Pillman kisses Austin on the cheek after Roma punches him. That’s just amusing.

Ventura makes a line about Pillman adjusting himself and Tony nearly loses it. After about five minutes we finally get something substantial going. Ventura asks why Anderson has had so many tag partners which is a good question. To be fair though he won titles with just about all of them. It’s freaking weird though seeing Anderson as a face. Roma is sloppy as a wet track but of course is told that he’s awesome for no apparent reason.

Since he’s great apparently, Roma is in there for about the first ten minutes of the match. Ok make that 8 out of ten but whatever. Thankfully just as I say that Arn comes back in. Pillman does his old standard Blondes thing of just faking a knee injury. It worked every time yet for some reason no one ever got that. It’s like when Bret plays possum.

You don’t think that even though he’s done it a million times he’s not doing it here again? Pillman’s tights are riding up so more or less he’s wearing a half thong. Roma just simply isn’t popular at all and it’s showing badly as the fans are really restless. He can’t even do a dropkick properly. This is pathetic. Anderson gets the tag and the crowd…does nothing at all really.

This is just boring and a great example of a match that needs some time cut off. Either that or a different partner for Anderson so it’s not so freaking boring. Austin finally comes in and then we hit the floor immediately. That was rather pointless. I wonder why Anderson is so freaking tired after not being in that long. My guess would be it’s from carrying Roma. It’s getting better now which is a good sign.

The middle hurt it a lot though. Anderson suplexes Austin over the ropes and Jesse wants a DQ. Roma gets the tag and no one really cares again. This crowd more or less sucks by the way. Roma rolls up Austin but Pillman hits a clothesline to reverse it and Austin hooks the tights for the pin. Tony talking about how stunning that is makes me chuckle.

Rating: C+. The ending was better and the drama was there, but Roma was just annoying as all goodness. I’ve never heard a deader crowd either. The wrestling was pretty there but not great. This is right in the middle for me, but I could see it going either way for a lot of people.

Here’s another title match at Clash of the Champions XXIV.

Unified Tag Team Titles: Steve Austin/Steven Regal vs. Arn Anderson/Paul Roma

Anderson and Roma are challenging. Austin and Anderson get things going and shove each other to a stand still. Austin takes over with a clothesline and some knees to the back but Arn trips the leg and hammers away with left hands to the head. A catapult sends Austin over the top but Austin skins the cat to get back inside. Instead Anderson backdrops him over the top to the floor which should have been a DQ.

Off to Regal vs. Roma with Paul coming in off the top to work on the shoulder. Regal knocks him over with a shoulder but Roma comes right back with a dropkick. Austin rips Paul up from the apron and the champions take over. Pillman gets in some choking from the floor like a good villain should. Back in and Regal breaks up a sunset flip and hits a running forward roll splash for two. Austin gets the tag and Roma hammers away but gets sent into the corner to stop a comeback attempt.

Regal drives some knees into the ribs and throws some left hands in the corner. Austin comes in again and hits some forearms to the back of Roma’s head but gets caught in his own Stun Gun. Regal comes in for the save and the referee puts him out, meaning he misses the hot tag to Anderson. Regal catches Roma’s kick but Paul jumps up for a dropkick in a nice looking move. Now the hot tag brings in Anderson to clean house and the butler Sir William accidentally hits Austin with his umbrella, giving the Horsemen the belts.

Rating: C-. This was already better than any match on the previous Clash. There wasn’t much to see here though as the match wasn’t really in doubt given the substitute partner. Roma wasn’t exactly great in the ring though and it was Arn doing most of the heavy lifting out there.

The Horsemen wouldn’t last long and it was off to Pretty Wonderful with Paul Orndorff. Here they are at Starrcade 1993.

Paul Orndorff/Paul Roma vs. 2 Cold Scorpio/Marcus Bagwell

Roma and Orndorff would eventually become a regular team known as Pretty (Roma) Wonderful (Orndorff). Both guys are from the WWF and both have seen far better days at this point. Bagwell teamed with a long list of partners over the years with Scorpio being his current teammate. They also have Teddy Long as their manager, who receives an award for being Manager of the Year. The Pauls have the masked Assassin as their manager to counter.

It’s a brawl to start with Marcus and Scorpio clearing the ring with a pair of double dropkicks. Bagwell and Roma finally get things going with Roma pounding him down, only to be caught by a crossbody for two. Bagwell cranks on the arm before it’s off to Scorpio for more of the same. A middle rope punch to Roma’s shoulder keeps Bagwell in control and it’s off to a short arm scissors. Roma finally takes him down to escape and brings in Orndorff.

The other Paul (called Paula by the fans) charges in and gets caught by a wristlock from Scorpio. A few flying headscissors puts Orndorff down and it’s off to an armbar. Off to Bagwell for a splash for two. Back to Roma who is caught in an armbar of his own followed by an atomic drop. The good guys double team Roma with a quick drop toehold from Bagwell, setting up a badly botched splash from Scorpio. Roma was sitting up (presumably making it his fault) so Scorpio landed on the back of Roma’s neck in a scary looking move.

Thankfully Roma isn’t paralyzed and can scream about Scorpio hurting his arm. We’re over seven minutes into this thing and the vast majority has been spent on armbars. Back to Bagwell as Orndorff FINALLY gets in a few shots to take over. The commentary goes out for awhile, presumably due to boredom. Roma hits a few backbreakers and stops to check his hair.

Back to Orndorff for a Saito Suplex (modified belly to back) for two. Roma comes back in and misses a top rope splash, allowing for the tag off to Scorpio. Bagwell and Roma fight on the floor as 2 Cold hits a top rope fist to Orndorff. A spinwheel kick takes Orndorff down as the Assassin puts something in his hood before headbutting Scorpio, allowing Orndorff to get the easy pin.

Rating: D-. This was about as boring as you can get without falling sound asleep. The Paul’s were a very basic tag team who gave you nothing at all of interest. Bagwell and Scorpio could have been any two guy as they added nothing whatsoever. This was a very

And again, this time for the titles, at Fall Brawl 1994.

Tag Titles: Pretty Wonderful vs. Stars N Stripes

We see Barry Darsow AGAIN but this time he’s being thrown out. Seriously, Paul Orndorff and Paul Roma are the tag champions and it’s 1994. Let that sink in for a bit. Bagwell shakes hands with Penzer. I kind of like that for some reason. It’s nice if nothing else. What the heck happened to this kid? He became the biggest dick I’ve ever seen, and I’ve seen my share of big dicks. Oh just leave it alone.

The Patriot apparently changed houses between this and Halloween Havoc as he’s billed as from DC here and South Carolina next time. Roma and Orndorff are reminding me of Billy and Chuck. They actually call the previous sham a match. I’ve heard it all now. Other than Admin KB, but I think that could come this year. Stars N Stripes beat the champions in a non title match to set this up. They make fun of the WWF and say these are wrestlers and not bodybuilders.

Keep in mind that Bagwell would become Buff Bagwell in a few years and Orndorff was Mr. Wonderful for his muscles. And yeah you guessed it, the match sucks. Nothing at all of note goes on here as it’s just four guys with no heat having a tag team match. Thankfully it’s shorter than their rematch next month.

Yes, Orndorff and Roma got to fight on PPV again, but as challengers where they won the belts again. Anyway, this is just boring stuff for the most part. Orndorff dumps a cooler with soda and ice onto Bagwell for no apparent reason and miscommunication between the faces ends this.

Rating: D+. Now remember, Regal and Austin lost their titles tonight, but Roma and Orndorff keep theirs. Let that sink in a bit. To further the pure stupidity of this company, these teams fought again SIX DAYS LATER and the faces won the belts, which they held until October, only to lose them back to Paul and Paul, before Stars N Stripes won them AGAIN, before losing them to Harlem Heat for their first reign. Did Orndorff save Hogan from drowning in cocaine or something once?

After quickly losing the titles, they would have another chance to get them back at Halloween Havoc 1994.

Tag Titles: Stars N Stripes vs. Pretty Wonderful

Pretty Wonderful are the former champions here as Stars N Stripes beat them about a month earlier. Good night do those teams sound generic. Pretty Wonderful is made up of Pretty Paul Roma and Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff. Stars N Stripes are Bagwell and the Patriot. I really am not looking forward to this. This just sounds like a bad match on an indy show or something like that.

Heenan suggests that the Patriot is Al Gore. Something tells me that Bobby is going to be all that gets me through this match and show. Bagwell was a five time champion with four different partners. That either says he’s a great tag wrestler or he has no direction so they kept throwing him in random tag teams because he had a big contract and they had nothing else to do with him.

You can tell the announcers are just bored to death as they’re arguing over what a tag is and then there’s something about Dennis Rodman. This is just BORING. They actually say this is the last night Hogan will face Flair. That’s just hilarious. They wrestled 15 years later and likely will in TNA also. They discuss the Lions’ Super Bowl chances. This is just amusing. Nothing at all is going on in the match.

They say that Tiger Stadium and Yankee Stadium are the last great ballparks. The real last great ballparks are the ones still in use today: Fenway and Wrigley. Heenan says that once all of the matches are over, no one is going to take a shower because they’ll all be watching the cage match.

Ok, number one, why does Heenan know the showering habits of the wrestlers and why would no one take a shower after their match when they have about an hour and a half before the main event? How clean do they like to get? The fans are more or less dead for this by the way. Bagwell hits the suplex and Wonderful hits an elbow on him to get the titles. This was somehow worse than the previous match.

Rating: D-. I have never cared less about a match than I did here. I’ve always thought Bagwell was hot and there’s a former Horseman in there though so it’s not a failure. The announcers were bored too as this was just bland as all goodness. Changing the titles over and over again got very dull but it was a way of life in WCW around this time.

We’ll wrap it up with one more singles match at SuperBrawl V.

Paul Roma vs. Alex Wright

GO BACK TO THE VIDEO PACKAGES!!! This match is kind of infamous as it got Roma fired from the company for the way he acted in it. More or less Roma was sent out there to put Wright over and nothing else. Roma, thinking for some reason that he’s worth more than Wright and for some reason that he’s simply not going to get in trouble for what he’s about to pull, more or less just made Wright look terrible and embarrassed him to no end.

Naturally he was gone and hasn’t been seen on a major show since. Roma is completely dominating so far although to be fair we’re a minute into this. Wright keeps trying to take over but Roma keeps fighting back which he shouldn’t do at all here. OH MAN Heenan is gone. You can barely understand him half the time. Orndorff, Roma’s tag partner, comes down to ringside. Roma I guess allows Wright to get an armbar to control a bit.

He’s showing off again though with a lot of power moves as Wright has done more or less nothing so far. Basically Roma is controlling the whole thing and is making sure Wright gets nothing. Even on a backslide he won’t let Wright get him down easily, fighting him the whole way before kicking out at one to make it look even weaker. Roma is a jobber to the stars at this point so this should be a glorified squash for Wright who was getting a pretty decent push around this time.

See, Wright starts a comeback and Roma avoids a dropkick. A SWEET top rope elbow from Roma connects. Note again, that’s going to be the biggest and most memorable spot in the match, as in Roma is the one getting remembered. Roma won’t even let him do a hiptoss, more or less intentionally botching it. You have to feel bad for Wright here. He’s 18 years old and he’s got one of the biggest matches of his career at a major PPV against a former Horseman.

He’s told that it’ll more or less be a dominating performance by Wright, or at worst pretty even and the guy out there isn’t cooperating whatsoever. That’s ridiculous on all levels to make a kid like Wright have to work on the fly like this. Wright hits one of his big moves, a spin wheel kick, and Roma gets up at one again. Roma talks to Paul and it lets Wright get a dropkick to the back and a rollup. Roma AGAIN kicks out but Randy Anderson the referee is just like screw it and calls for the bell.

Rating: D. To make something clear here: Alex Wright is in ZERO way responsible for this match being bad. Roma completely screwed this up by being 100% unprofessional out there and in the process destroyed both of their careers. Wright, while still undefeated, looks completely weak here as he can’t beat a guy like Roma without a total fluke so his push more or less died and Roma was out in a few days. This was totally uncalled for and bogus on top of that. Roma, grow up. You need to.

Paul Roma just wasn’t very good and is definitely the black sheep of the Horsemen. He was almost always a tag wrestler and not a very good one at that. Roma had a good look and was easy to hate but at the end of the day he had to have a good match now and then. The guy isn’t memorable for the most part and was only there for his looks most of the time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today we’re looking at the forgotten member of a trio: Gangrel.

Gangrel got his start back in 1988 and we’ll pick things up on April 22, 1989 on WCW Pro under his real name of David Heath.

David Heath vs. Iron Sheik

Sheik nails him from behind with the Iranian flag and drops Heath with a clothesline. A backdrop sets up chops and choking as we’re in full squash territory here. Sheik suplexes him down and the camel clutch is good for the submission.

From the same day on another syndicated program called World Wide.

David Heath vs. Great Muta

Muta poses a lot and blows mist into the air to start. Some chops put Heath down and some power drive elbows have him reeling early. We hit the chinlock for about two seconds before it’s time to crank on the arm. Muta works on a wristlock and shoulder claw for a long time (well, long for a squash match at least)…..and it actually gets a submission. That’s a surprise but a good way to make Muta look even more dangerous.

He would head to the WWF as the Black Phantom to job a bit. From Superstars in February 1993.

Razor Ramon vs. Black Phantom

Razor is Intercontinental Champion and this is non-title. A wristlock takes Phantom to the mat but he comes back with a middle rope DDT for two. The Phantom gets dropped by a chokeslam and the belly to back superplex followed by the Razor’s Edge for the easy win.

Off to Raw on January 23, 1993.

British Bulldog vs. Black Phantom

Shawn is on commentary so Bulldog has to yell a bit before we get going. Phantom uses the distraction to snap Davey’s throat across the top rope and a jumping DDT gets two. Bulldog comes back with a suplex and chinlock. The masked man slams Davey down but misses a middle rope splash, setting up the powerslam for the pin.

He would have a few stops in ECW, including this match on July 28, 1995.

Steiner Brothers vs. Vampire Warrior/Dudley Dudley

Vampire Warrior is more famous as Gangrel. Scott and Dudley get things going with the guy you’ve probably heard of throwing Dudley around with ease twice in a row. A butterfly powerbomb sends Dudley running for the corner and it’s off to the Warrior and Rick. The Steiners are WAY over here. The Warrior gets in some chops to start but walks into a BIG powerslam to stop him cold.

Some double teaming slows Rick down for a bit and it’s back to Dudley for some lame shots to the back and a neckbreaker for two. More double teaming ensues but Dudley jumps into Rick’s boot. Hot tag brings in Scott and house is immediately cleaned as Scott busts out a bunch of suplexes. The Steiner bulldog ends the Warrior with ease.

Rating: D+. We’ll file this one under “what else were you expecting?” The Steiners were still an awesome team at this point and two of the guys that could hang with anyone in the ring. Back when he was on his game, there wasn’t much more fun to watch than Scott Steiner throwing people around like they were nothing.

Heath would get a few shots in WCW in their big run, including this match on World Wide on June 14, 1997.

Rey Mysterio Jr. vs. Vampire Warrior

Rey hammers away to start but gets dropped by a hard shoulder block. Mysterio flips to the apron but his springboard cross body is caught in midair. Warrior throws him out to the floor before a spinning vertical suplex gets two. A catapult into the bottom rope gets the same and we hit the chinlock. Rey is sent into the corner but crotches Warrior on the top to turn things around. A top rope hurricanrana is enough to give Mysterio the pin.

Rating: C-. Mysterio was sharp at this point and got to sell like only he can here. Warrior got in some offense of his own, even though it wasn’t going to get him anywhere. I was surprised by how much he got to show off though and it made the match a bit better. Mysterio isn’t the kind of guy that can dominate a match and then win with ease so there wasn’t much else they could do here.

It was off to the WWF after this under the Gangrel name. We’ll start things off on Raw, August 17, 1998.

Brian Christopher vs. Gangrel

This is Gangrel’s Raw debut after he won last night on Heat with an Impaler. Edge is chilling in the crowd watching Gangrel. Brian jumps him to start and hits a middle rope bulldog to take over. Gangrel hits a tiger driver and the Impaler to end this quick.

From Raw, November 2, 1998.

D-Generation X vs. The Brood

This would be the Outlaws and X-Pac. This is being written the day after Raw 1000 so they’re pretty fresh in my mind. The Brood is Edge, Christian and the leader Gangrel. They may have picked the wrong guy to be in charge. Pac and Edge get us going and you know how fast that’s going to go. Pac kicks Edge’s head off for two but Edge comes back with a spinebuster.

Off to Christian who is in a long sleeve shirt for some reason which is really loose on him. It’s a pretty odd look but he hits a gutbuster to take over. Hot tag brings in Road Dogg for some shaking punches and it’s back to Edge. He DDTs Road Dogg and everything breaks down. The lights go out and it’s Kane time. He clears the ring and we’ll say it’s thrown out too soon to rate. There was nothing to see here.

Gangrel would be on one of the European PPVs called Capital Carnage.

Gangrel vs. Al Snow

Well this is an interesting place to start. This is during the time the Brood was relatively new and no one knew what in the world to make of them. That music is still awesome. The announcers say nothing at all during his entrance which is odd to me. Snow has Head with him and is therefore ridiculously popular.

He does the dance which is always amusing for some reason. Ross and King are back all of a sudden. Well ok then. This is the JOB Squad era which really is a good idea in theory. I think it’s just the tape but the audio is REALLY bad here. Oh look it’s a British fan with an airhorn. You know I was waiting on that.

Snow starts by hitting all of his standard stuff, meaning that the in ring stuff is overshadowed by the insanity of his character which is a shame. The fans always do the We Want Head thing which gets a bit annoying but is always funny. Edge and Christian hit the ring after about 4 minutes or so which was of course expected. With Christian distracting the referee, Snow gets a shot with Head but Edge hits a missile dropkick from the top for the pin.

Rating: C. Eh it was to get the Brood over so that’s fine. Snow was by far the more talented guy and since he made the match coherent, that means it’s good. You can’t expect much out of Gangrel due to a high level of suck. Oh that was funny. Anyway, this was fine for an opener I guess as Snow got the fans awake, which is exactly what he was supposed to do, and since he’s in the JOB Squad, no one expected him to win anyway.

Time for another six man at In Your House XXVI.

Brood vs. J.O.B. Squad

The brood is Gangrel, Edge and Christian while the J.O.B. Squash is Bob Holly, Scorpio and Al Snow, who have united together after getting sick of constantly losing to bigger stars. Edge pounds on Holly to start but walks into a powerslam and a falcon’s arrow for two. A clothesline puts Holly down and it’s off to Christian, who lost the Light Heavyweight Title to J.O.B. Squad member Duane Gill with help from Snow.

Scorpio comes in to kick Christian in the face and get a two count off a middle rope flipping legdrop. Off to the Squad’s leader Al Snow for some headbutts to the chest but getting caught in a reverse DDT. Gangrel gets the tag and pounds away in the corner before clotheslining Snow down. They’re not exactly getting out of first gear here. Snow comes back with a wheelbarrow suplex but Gangrel DDTs him down and brings in Edge. Off to a chinlock on Snow but he quickly fights up and a double clothesline drops both guys.

Scorpio and Christian come in to speed things up but everything quickly breaks down. Holly and Christian are left in the ring with Christian being dropped long enough to allow Snow to blast him with Head. Scorpio hits a moonsault legdrop for two as Edge makes the save. Edge follows that up by diving over the top to take out Holly and Snow before Christian hits what would become the Unprettier and then the Killswitch for the pin on Scorpio.

Rating: D. This really didn’t do much for me as it was a very dull match with a wild ending. Also, this makes the heels 0-4 on the show tonight which isn’t the right way to get the crowd into things. The Brood would get better in the future while the J.O.B. Squad would never amount to anything, meaning they’re living up to their name.

Gangrel actually got a title match at Royal Rumble 1999.

European Title: Gangrel vs. X-Pac

The vampire is challenging. This is another of those matches that is there so they can have another title match on the card, meaning there’s no story that I can think of. Road Dogg might have gotten a blood bath recently but that’s about it. They hit the ropes very quickly to start with Pac grabbing an armdrag to take over. Gangrel grabs a headlock but they speed things up almost immediately again.

Pac hits a quick legdrop but misses a kick in the corner to shift momentum again. We hit the chinlock to give the guys an earned breather. The champ fights up and gets thrown into the air for two. Gangrel misses a top rope elbow and Pac gets two off his jumping clothesline. A big spinwheel kick takes Gangrel down again and X-Pac hits the Bronco Buster.

The third spinwheel kick in about four minutes takes Gangrel down, but Pac gets crotched on the top, continuing a theme tonight. Pac tries a cross body but Gangrel rolls him through for a botched near fall by referee Teddy Long (he countered three but Pac’s shoulder was up). Not that it matters as the X Factor retains the title a few seconds later.

Rating: C+. Referee’s botch aside, this was a nice surprise. Gangrel is hardly known for his in ring abilities but he looked pretty good out there tonight. Pac was better here against a smaller guy as usual, and we got a good match out of it. After the two longer and not great matches earlier, this was a nice pick up.

Gangrel would be in a Survivor Series match in 1999.

Team Val Venis vs. Team British Bulldog

Val Venis, Mark Henry, Gangrel, Steve Blackman

British Bulldog, Mean Street Posse

Even JR says that Val’s team has nothing in common at all. The Posse is a group of three guys from Greenwich, Connecticut who wear sweater vests and never won a match that wasn’t a hardcore match that they won by mistake. I have no idea why this match exists but my guess is “we have no idea what else to do with these fifteen minutes.” Bulldog is European Champion here which is likely a title Val wants.

The captains start things off and after some quick offense from both, it’s off to Pete Gas (the Posse was Rodney, Pete Gas and Joey Abs). Pete is scared to death of having to actually wrestle so it’s back to Bulldog. Once Venis is down it’s off to Pete who hits a slingshot to send Val chest first into the buckle. A belly to back suplex gets two for Pete as Jerry asks where JR would get nice clothes in Oklahoma. JR: “Arkansas.” Off to Blackman for the only thing he could do: martial arts. A bicycle kick gets the quick elimination for Blackman.

Off to Rodney who has even less luck against Blackman, immediately getting taken down. Gangrel comes in who gets caught in a crucifix for two before Gangrel realizes he’s fighting Rodney. He pounds on the Posse dude, shrugs off a cheap shot from Joey, and plants Rodney with the implant DDT (Edgecution) for the elimination. Joey, by far the best of the three Posse members, comes in and gets to face Mark Henry. Joey actually hits a hot shot on Henry but crotches himself on the middle rope. Mark does about what you would expect him to and splashes him for the pin.

So it’s 4-1 now and Bulldog comes in to fight Henry. Mark runs Bulldog over with ease and it’s off to Gangrel. Gangrel goes up top and is immediately crotched and superplexed down to make it 3-1. Blackman is in next but he misses a middle rope headbutt. He argues with the referee and gets caught in a fisherman’s suplex to make it Henry/Val vs. Bulldog. Val gets to start but it’s quickly a double team. Jerry: “Hey what’s this?” JR: “Well it looks like Mark Henry and Val Venis double teaming the Bulldog King.” Val gets sent to the floor but Henry splashes Bulldog, allowing Val to come in off the top with the Money Shot for the pin.

Rating: D-. This was as worthless as it was advertised. The Posse is one of those groups that is funny in retrospect but at the time they were wasting PPV time when there had to have been better options for this spot. Venis would have been a bigger deal a year ago so I’m not quite sure why he was in this spot either. Little trivia note: this is the shortest four on four Survivor Series match ever, breaking the record set about 20 minutes ago.

Gangrel actually made it all the way to 2000, including this match on Smackdown, February 3, 2000.

Intercontinental Title: Chris Jericho vs. Gangrel

Chris is defending. Jericho hammers away in the corner to start and drops Gangrel with a spinwheel kick. Gangrel sends him out to the floor where the seconds, Chyna and Luna Vachon respectfully, stare at each other. Back in and an elbow drop gets two on Chris but he sends Gangrel out to the floor. Gangrel scores with a Russian legsweep but tries a top rope sunset flip, only to get rolled through into the Walls to retain Chris’ title.

Gangrel would head to the WWA promotion for their Inception PPV.

Luna Vachon vs. Vampire Warrior

This is a Black Wedding Match, which I think means hardcore but I have no idea for sure. Luna slaps him and Gangrel won’t fight back because it’s his wife. Gangrel finally kind of slams her down and we head outside. There’s wedding themed stuff on the floor and Gangrel takes a cake to the face. Luna gets tongs and grabs Gangrel’s balls with them. We get a pumpkin shot in and you can connect the dots on this one yourself I think. Luna throws down her wedding ring and spits at him, earning her an inverted DDT for the pin. Nothing here at all but ANOTHER comedy match.

Time for the required TNA appearance, from Weekly PPV #57 on August 13, 2014.

3 Live Kru vs. Devon Storm/Sinn/Vampire Warrior

That would be Konnan/BG James/Ron Killings vs. Crowbar/Kizarny/Gangrel. Konnan and Storm get things going as Don West hypes up the Kru’s growing popularity. Feeling out process to start with Storm being sent over the top but skinning the cat back in. Konnan goes to the old school idea of grabbing the arm before bringing in James to work it over even more.

Storm gets two off a northern lights suplex before suplexing Sinn into a moonsault. Warrior comes in for some elbow drops for two but James gets up for a double collision. Cue the Harris Brothers to watch the match as Killings comes in off the tag. An ax kick puts Warrior on the floor as everything breaks down. Konnan dropkicks Sinn for two and Killings hits a kind of Poetry in Motion. James pumphandle slams him for the pin.

Rating: D. This was a messy tag match and a bit much for just five minutes. The Kru actually would become a pretty big deal in TNA over the next few years and one of the few acts they had that mattered in the early days. Sinn was nothing at this point other than a guy in furry red pants.

We’ll jump ahead about eleven years for one more match at Tommy Dreamer’s House of Hardcore on June 14, 2014.

Gangrel/Matt Striker vs. X-Pac/Rikishi

Striker and Rikishi get things going with Matt stopping for some pushups. Rikishi does the I say US you say O deal and they finally lock up. Striker fires off some right hands and hurts his hand on Rikishi’s hand in a funny bit. Instead he steps on Rikishi’s foot but the sight of Rikishi bent over scares him away. Seriously. A slam attempt goes as well as you would think and the threat of a Stinkface sends Striker over for a tag.

X-Pac comes in to chants of 1-2-3 and Syxx. A big spinwheel kick sends Gangrel outside and Pac follows him out with a plancha. Striker tries to get in a cheap shot but eats a Bronco Buster for his efforts. Back to Matt legally for a hard back elbow to the jaw. Pac fights back against Gangrel but he walks into a belly to belly for two.

Gangrel charges into a boot and the real hot tag brings in Rikishi. House (of Hardcore) is cleaned but Gangrel low blows his way out of a Stinkface. It earns him an X-Factor but Striker makes the save and takes the real Stinkface. Gangrel shoves him for some reason and it’s a chokeslam and fat Samoan sitdown splash for the pin.

Rating: D+. For four guys that wrestle on the indies or special events only, I’ve seen far worse. This was about 80% comedy and that’s all you can really expect from someone like Rikishi anymore. Gangrel was just kind of there as a name you might remember and nothing more, which is a fine way to get a paycheck.

Gangrel is a guy who basically got by on his gimmick alone. To his credit though, it was quite the awesome gimmick. Vampires are always going to get people’s attention and that cocky smile made him even better. The big problem for Gangrel is associating with two future World Champions as it gives you some almost impossible expectations to overcome.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today we’re looking at the most important thing you can have going into a match.That thing is doubt.  Let’s look at the most famous wrestler of all time: Hulk Hogan.

 

Here’s the Hogan formula in a nutshell: a monster beats a bunch of jobbers and then a midcard guy, then he says he wants Hogan.  This sets up a big showdown in a major arena with the fans buying tickets because this conversation was taking place in school cafeterias all over the country:

“Studd can beat anybody.”

“He can’t beat Hogan……can he?”

“Man I don’t know.  We have to go to the show!”

 

Then Hogan would lose the first big match by countout or DQ.  The fans would be stunned because there was no way Hogan could lose and then there would be a rematch where Hogan would win.  A third match was needed to break the tie and you have three months of big house shows for the feud.  The key to the whole thing is doubt.  As soon as the fans say “can he?” there’s a reason to buy a ticket, because you have to see if Hogan can pull it off one more time.

 

The same is true for every big match.  You have someone you want to see win, but in a good story there’s a reason to believe they can’t do it.  You can buy it on PPV or watch it on TV or if you’re lucky actually go to the show, but you have to see if your guy can pull it off.  That’s the key to storytelling and making you want to see the match

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

.

 

 

It’s my favorite moment ever in wrestling and the loudest pop you’ll ever hear.On January 4, 1999, WCW had Kevin Nash lose the WCW World Title to Hulk Hogan via the Fingerpoke of Doom.  Over on Raw, the WWF Title was changing hands as well, which WCW decided to tell their audience.  Here’s what the hundreds of thousands of fans that changed the channel saw.

 

 

 

 

WWF Title: Mankind vs. The Rock

This is No DQ remember. This is the match that Tony Schiavone gave the ending away to on their show, shifting the ratings for the night because of it. DX comes out to back up Foley, because they couldn’t go to the hospital with Shawn or help defend him right? Rock of course has the Corporation with him.

Rock jumps him immediately and knocks him to the floor. He won’t let the Corporation beat them up because he wants to do it himself. How noble of our heel champion. Foley does his first sick bump of the match as he goes knee first into the steps and flies over them in a painful looking shot. These two always had mad chemistry together, which is something that could be said about most guys with Rock actually.

Rock does commentary during the match, which always cracked me up. He talks a bit too much though so Foley takes over. Foley does a promo of his own and we cut to a shot of Vince and Shane, but we hear a bell ring. Foley is down and Rock has the bell. Subtle. Rock Bottom through a table and Foley is in trouble. This has all taken less than three minutes so I’m not leaving much out at all.

To play up the spontaneous nature here Rock is in street clothes, as in the kind you would work out in. Corporate Elbow (debuted 5 minutes from my house) hits for two as this is ALL Rock. Foley with a spinning neckbreaker out of nowhere to get both guys down. Bossman throws the belt in and a shot to the head (sounded SICK) gets two as well. Double arm DDT onto the belt and Rock is in big trouble.

There’s Mr. Socko as the crowd has lost it. Mandible Claw goes on but Shamrock pops Foley with a chair. Billy Gunn takes him down and the brawl begins. Everything goes crazy and CUE GLASS SHATTER! Austin comes out and everyone loses it. He caves Rock’s head in with a chair and pulls Mick on top for the pin and the world title as the roof is blown off the arena.

Rating: A+. This was about a shocking moment and excitement and a feel good story and they NAILED it. This is very personal bias heavy, but they’re my reviews so who cares?

DX puts Foley on their shoulders as the Corporation carries Rock out. Cole gets in the famous line of “Mick Foley has achieved his dream and the dream of everyone else who has been told you can’t do it!” This is one of the best feel good moment in WWF history as Foley was considered one of the best to never be world champion as he worked as hard as anyone else but was never given a serious shot at it.

He got the shot tonight and he won the title. Road Dogg does the big announcement of Mankind being the new champion to a HUGE ovation. Foley dedicates the win to his kids and takes a lap around the ring with the belt to end the show. This is my favorite moment in wrestling history, bar none.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today is the clueless putz himself Steven Richards.

Richards started in ECW in 1992, even having the first match at the ECW Arena. We’ll pick things up in the same promotion (well the same letters at least) on February 4, 1995 at Double Tables.

Stevie Richards vs. Tommy Dreamer

Richards is Raven’s main lackey and helping in the war with Dreamer. They shove each other up against the ropes to start with Richards cowering like you would expect him to. To the floor now with Richards nailing him in the face and taking Dreamer’s shirt. Back in and Dreamer hammers away before planting Richards with a swinging neckbreaker.

Richards is tossed back to the floor and whipped into the barricade as this is getting violent. Back inside with a low blow to Stevie with a frying pan but Stevie pops back up with a backdrop. The DDT catches Richards out of nowhere but Raven grabs Dreamer. Stevie gets back up for a superkick and Tommy is in trouble. Another superkick is blocked with a low blow and Dreamer grabs the rollup pin.

Rating: D. Richards wasn’t much to see in the ring and that was very apparent here. The match wasn’t any good and was just there for Raven to interfere. The perk of a feud like Dreamer and Raven is they could have a bunch of matches with other guys to keep their big showdowns fresh.

We’re going to look at what is considered ECW’s best match by a variety of reviewers. This is from Gangstas’ Paradise and it’s double dog collar, 2/3 falls.

Tag Team Titles: Pitbulls vs. Raven/Stevie Richards

The Pitbulls are challenging and they’re done if they lose. There’s no Richards in sight to start so Raven looks to be going it alone. Beaulah says Richards broke his arm last night so we should make this 2/3 falls. The Pitbulls agree and Raven ties himself up to #2. The brawl is on and #2 starts choking Raven over the ropes as #1 runs to the back. A chair to the head has Raven in even more trouble as #1 drags Richards (with both arms looking fine) out with the collar attaching them.

Richards gets beaten up with a chair as Raven piledrives #2 through the table for a fast pin. The second fall begins with #1 taking a double DDT for two as #2 makes the save. Another table is brought in as #1 beats on Richards even more. With Raven down, a Super Bomb through the table is enough to tie things up as we get down to the real stuff with the third fall.

We take a quick break to look at both falls and come back to see Richards a bloody mess. #1 takes Richards into the crowd where Richards nails him with a chair. Raven and #2 fight in the aisle until #2 sends in another table. The referee goes down (like it matters) and here are the Dudleys (Dances With Dudley and Dudley Dudley) to beat up the Pitbulls. The champions hit Super Bombs but the Pitbulls pop right back up. A double DDT takes down all four villains and both Dudleys take Super Bombs of their own.

We get another table brought in but #2 leaves a Super Bomb on Raven short, driving the back of his head into the edge of the table. The referee wakes up and counts a VERY slow two so Raven busts out some ether to knock out #2 (Joey: “TAKE THAT CRAP TO SMOKY MOUNTAIN!” Yes it was a jab at Cornette’s booking.).

Raven sends #2 through two tables but is too spent to follow up. #2 is taken to the back as Richards gets crotched on the top and suplexed through a table. An unhooked Raven comes in for the save as Francine comes in to go after Richards and gets in a catfight with Beaulah, only to have Raven DDT her down. This brings out Dreamer to chain himself to Raven and lay him out with a DDT….and the pin?

We’re still not done yet though as heel referee Bill Alfonso (heel because he follows the rules) comes out to reverse the decision. Since Dreamer wasn’t in the match, the pin doesn’t count so he still hasn’t officially beaten Raven and the match continues. This brings out Commissioner Tod Gordon to yell at Alfonso but Bill nails him in the face.

Big Dick Dudley is here to chokeslam Dreamer, which Alfonso has to unban as Alfonso had made it illegal to protect himself from the chokeslamming machine 911 who had been wanting to chokeslam Alfonso for months. This immediately brings out 911 to plant Alfonso with a chokeslam for a standing ovation. The Pitbulls get back in to Super Bomb Raven for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B. It’s a good brawl, but the impressive part is all the intricate booking coming together to make the whole thing work. They were juggling about five stories at once here and everything was hitting to perfection. It’s not a masterpiece due to the match itself being nothing great, but the storytelling was really good.

Here’s a quick match at November to Remember 1995.

El Puerto Ricano vs. Stevie Richards

Richards is a goofy putz (Joey’s words) here and is Raven’s (top heel here) lackey. Richards gets a gift from the unnamed Blue Meanie who comes over the guardrail with a shirt that says Blue Meanie. The gift is a Flock of Seagulls half shirt. The non Clueless Putz (never did anything of note) jumps Richards and we’re off.

Ricano hits a missile dropkick and dives on Meanie to take care of him. He goes up too many times though and Richards slams him down to take over. Flock of Seagulls dude hits a powerbomb and the other guy (you type Ricano over and over again) is in trouble. He gets draped over the top and takes another Stevie Bomb. Blue Meanie comes in and misses a moonsault. Richards hits a superkick to end this. More or less just a squash.

We’ll jump ahead to House Party 1996 for a match with a hardcore legend.

Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

Richards slips getting into the ring and falls on his face. He also has a bad arm coming into this. Richards runs to start and throws in a chair. Yeah, throw a chair to Sabu. Joey agrees with me, saying that it’s like handing a chainsaw to Leatherface. Sabu has enough of the standing around so he hits a suicide dive to take over. Back inside and Sabu hooks a chinlock but Stevie powerbombs him out of the corner to take over.

Sabu will have none of that and comes back with a slingshot flipping legdrop. Off to an armbar of all things but it only lasts a few seconds. Richards is placed on the top rope and with the help of a chair, Sabu “hits” Air Sabu to knock him to the floor. Sabu slams him to the floor and both guys are down. Richards gets sent into the railing and Sabu sets up a table. Blue Meanie saves Stevie and we head back inside.

Sabu gets caught in an electric chair position but he rolls Richards over the top and out to the floor. This show needs to hurry up and end because it’s REALLY dragging badly now. Richards head fakes Sabu and the crazy one goes through the table. That would be the crazy one Sabu in case you were confused. Meanie gets in a kick on Sabu and they head inside again. Stevie drops a top rope punch for two as we see that he’s not the best on offense.

A Frankensteiner gets two for Sabu and both guys are spent. Richards is sent to the floor and Sabu finally dives over the top with a slingshot rana onto Meanie. Richards gets a horribly botched one of his own from Sabu and the guy in the bright yellow pants takes over again. Richards is placed on a table but Meanie makes the save.

Paul E of all people comes out to beat up Meanie and Sabu hits a dive through Richards through the table. Back inside and that only gets two as this match just keeps going. Richards rolls him up for two and hits the Stevie Kick for another two. A Sabu DDT gets the same and it’s chair time again. Sabu goes up and hits the Atomic Arabian Facebuster (flip leg drop with the chair) to get a pretty anti-climactic pin.

Rating: C-. This just kept going and going and it was only decent to begin with. Sabu would be pushed much harder over the next few months as he would feud with Taz while Richards would somehow get into the world title #1 contenders match at Barely Legal. This wasn’t awful but it dragged a lot which really hurt it.

Another match with another hardcore guy from Cyberslam 1997.

Balls Mahoney vs. Stevie Richards

Mahoney likes leather it seems. Uh…yeah. Use your imagination here people. It’s BWO Stevie here. A little trivia here is that Rob Feinstein, as in the RF in RF Video and a former owner of ROH is playing the Syxx (X-Pac) parody of 7-11 here. Balls has short hair here. He must trim them. The fans aren’t sure who they like here but it seems to be Stevie. I think the BWO is face here but it’s kind of hard to tell in the ECW Arena.

Stevie uses speed to take over, likely just offering Balls some to get him down. Off to an armbar now as the arena flashes his chest to the fans. Oh dear. Fujiwara Armbar now by Stevie (named after Mr. Fuji if you’ve been curious as to that for some odd reason). Balls pounds away for a bit and then it’s right back to Stevie’s armbar. Ten punches in the corner and then Stevie climbs the ropes backwards and rubs his tiguts in Balls’ face. So he wants Balls around his….never mind.

Another clothesline by Balls gets two. Balls has next to no offense outside of clotheslines and punches. He tries a spinwheel kick with Richards on the apron and yet he hits the floor before Richards. As in like 5 seconds before Richards. Stevie chills on the floor for a minute or so until Balls drags him back in. Middle rope elbow has Stevie in trouble.

This is boring if you couldn’t tell as we’re at about 8:30 so far. Yes, these two get eight and a half minutes. Balls gets a modified atomic drop (more like an elevated punch to the balls, thereby making Stevie’s voice elevated) and makes fun of the BWO. Top rope leg drop misses and it’s a Stunner by Stevie to give him control for all of half a second. Powerbomb and a superkick miss so Stevie kicks him in the balls and then the chin to end this.

Rating: D-. See, this is where the problems came from for ECW. In short, the matches aren’t that good. The characters are ok and the stories are more developed, but at the end of the day the wrestling just wasn’t there for the most part. They had some good talent, but a lot of the time it was a guy that punched a lot and had a finisher and that’s about it. They knew no basic stuff and it was glaringly obvious at times. Also, this getting nearly 13 minutes is a bit much.

Richards would start up the BWO and jump up the card, somehow getting into a #1 contenders match at Barely Legal.

Stevie Richards vs. Sandman vs. Terry Funk

This is under elimination rules and the winner gets Raven later in the night for the World Title. Richards is the leader of the BWO but he’s starting to be taken a bit more seriously as a main event guy. He used to be Raven’s lackey but has now struck out on his own. Sandman, known for drinking and smoking on the way to the ring, busts himself open with a beer can on the way to the ring. He and Raven have a long history as well so he would make sense as a challenger too. Funk is the grizzled veteran looking for one more hurrah and is taking Dreamer’s place tonight as Dreamer wanted his mentor to get the title.

Sandman downs another beer and spits it in Stevie’s face while still holding his Singapore cane. All three guys circle each other until Terry and Richards lock up. Sandman breaks it up and chops Stevie in the corner, only to get in a fight with Funk. An early spinning toehold is broken up by Richards and Terry takes a bunch of elbow drops from both guys. Sandman and Richards get into it so Terry hits four straight neckbreakers on Stevie for two.

With no real provocation, Sandman throws in a ladder which blasts Funk in the back of the head. He suplexes the ladder down onto Richards and hits Terry in the head again for two. Terry and Sandman climb the ladder in the corner but Funk moonsaults down onto a standing Stevie instead. Still on the ropes, Sandman picks up the ladder and drops it down onto Richards’ back for two.

Stevie superkicks the ladder into Sandman’s face for two before both of them climb the ladder for no apparent reason. Funk falls into them to knock everything over and all three guys are down. With Stevie down, Sandman and Terry take turns ramming each other face first into the ladder. Richards gets back up and catapults the ladder into the others’ faces and everyone is down again. The Stevie Kick nails Sandman for two and Terry takes one for the same.

Sandman throws both of them plus the ladder out to the floor and dives over the top, knocking the ladder into Richards’ face. Back in and Terry suplexes Stevie but Sandman throws in a trashcan, nailing Terry square in the head. Funk doesn’t seem to mind and even helps Sandman with a spike piledriver on Stevie. Sandman crushes him under the ladder but Terry can only get two.

Terry nails Sandman in the face with the ladder to send him to the floor as Dreamer rants about Raven getting to face the winner while fresh. A double powerbomb is enough to pin Richards and get us down to one on one, sucking some life out of the crowd. Sandman and Terry shake hands then punch each other in the face, only to have Terry backdrop him out to the floor and onto Stevie.

We get barbed wire brought in but Terry wraps Sandman’s shirt around his face and hammers away. The barbed wire is whipped over Sandman’s back to cut him open, but Sandman wraps it around himself and drops a top rope legdrop for two. Stevie is still here for some reason as the trashcan is put over Sandman’s head, setting up a superkick to knock Sandman silly. Terry adds a moonsault for the pin and the title shot.

Rating: C-. This was the hardcore mess that you have to expect with ECW. Sandman wasn’t much of a wrestler in the technical sense but the fans were way into him and he could throw a solid punch. Funk winning was the best option with Dreamer not being an option, but the fans were WAY behind Stevie here and an upset wouldn’t have been a terrible idea.

Richards would jump to WCW for a few matches, including this one on Nitro, August 18, 1997.

Stevie Richards vs. Scotty Riggs

Richards charges to the ring like a maniac. Riggs grabs the wrist to start before nearly botching a monkey flip. A dropkick puts Richards on the floor but he rams Scotty’s shoulder into the post to take over. Back in and a sitout spinebuster gets two for Stevie but Scotty comes back with some clotheslines. Richards loses his half shirt and gets caught in a side slam for two. Raven jumps the railing as Stevie hits the Stevie Kick for the pin.

Rating: D. I guess this was to set up future stuff but that didn’t make this any easier to get through. Riggs is just not that good and Richards is a comedy character which doesn’t make for an interesting or good match at all. Not much to see here but that would be the case for a lot of Nitro matches.

After a year or so doing nothing of note, it was off to the WWF with one of Richards first matches taking place on Smackdown, October 14, 1999.

Stevie Richards vs. Val Venis

Richards comes out as Dude Love because he’s a bit out there. Val counters a monkey flip with a hot shot but walks into a superkick for two. Back up and Venis slams him down and hits the Money Shot for the pin in just over a minute.

Richards would become Steven Richards and lead the Right to Censor as a parody of the PTC. Here he is at Summerslam 2000.

Right to Censor vs. Too Cool/Rikishi

Too Cool and Rikishi are WAY over at this point and even won the tag titles over the summer. The RTC is Richards/Goodfather/Bull Buchanan at this point. Some of Goodfather’s former women come out with Rikishi, one of which would become known as Victoria. It’s a big brawl to start until we get Scotty pounding on Buchanan. Hotty backflips over Buchanan and pulls him down before getting two off a high cross body. Off to Sexay for a double suplex before Goodfather comes in and falls to the floor. He shoves Victoria down before punching Sexay in the face to take over.

Buchanan gets in some shots of his own and it’s off to Richards for his cheap shots. A powerbomb gets two and JR sounds stunned. Steven gets crotched on top and superplexed down allowing for the hot tag to Rikishi. The fat man cleans house and Victoria throws Richards back in the ring. The RTC is sent into the corner with Too Cool being launched into all of them at once, but Bull gets in a quick ax kick to take the Samoan down. Scotty loads up the Worm but Steven kicks his head off for the pin.

Rating: C. Basic six man tag here to get the crowd going. A fast paced act like Too Cool and Rikishi is always a great choice to start up a show as the crowd gets fired up for the entrance and hopefully stays hot for the rest of the show. The RTC was a fine choice for a heel stable as they took away what the fans wanted to see and the people were glad to see them get beaten up.

Another match from No Mercy 2000.

Val Venis/Steven Richards vs. Billy Gunn/Chyna

Steven refers to Gunn as rectally obsessed. That somehow fits. Who came up with the stupid name? They need to be drug out into the street and shot. Val and Rikishi start us off which is as riveting as it sounds. Val punches Chyna on the floor and goes into the steps for his troubles. This is going nowhere fast. I hate that expression but it fits here.

Chyna spins Richards around by the tie. She goes off on him and the heels are in trouble. Val goes after the arm of Billy as this is setting new standards for boring. Chyna gets a very weak tag for the beatdown. Handspring elbow to Val as Billy helps to beat him up. Pedigree attempt but Eddie comes down to hit her with the loaded flowers and Val gets the pin.

Rating: F. Sweet GOODNESS this was boring. I get the injury thing but at the same time this had nothing at all to it. Get on to the next match please.

The RTC would start going downhill but they had one more decent night at No Way Out 2001.

Jerry Lawler vs. Steven Richards

Tazz does commentary in Lawler’s place. He’s still a wrestler so this is a new thing for him. He’s a bit like his normal commentating self but not all the way yet. Lawler makes a full entrance despite being at the commentary desk not 2 minutes ago. We see a clip of the RTC stopping the (XFL’s) Las Vegas Outlaws cheerleaders last night. RTC was a parody of the Parents Television Council who got on Vince every 9 seconds for something he did.

This is the walking definition of a catch your breath match as the fans need something worthless to bridge the gap from the war they just saw to the last two matches. Lawler expands his offense from just punches by adding in rapid fire punches. This is why it’s great to have someone like Lawler around: you can throw him in there for something like this and you know he’s going to at least be passable, especially since he only wrestles like twice a year so his expectations are very low.

Kat and Ivory go at it for a bit but the distraction allows Richards to take over. Richards misses a splash in the corner and Lawler takes over for a bit. Apparently if he wins Kat gets to lose her clothes. Ivory comes in and Teddy Long takes FOREVER to get rid of her. Kat tries to hit Richards with Ivory’s belt but she nails Lawler by mistake for the pin. Kat has to join RTC now, but she was released in like two weeks, resulting in Lawler quitting. They were married at the time.

Rating: D. This was pretty weak but at the same time it was about as good as it was going to get. It was on the level of a pretty bad TV match but like I said this was designed to just fill in about 10 minutes so that the fans could breathe a bit. Nothing special at all but it did its job I guess.

Richards would become his old self around this time and win 21 Hardcore Titles. We’ll skip past that as there’s almost nothing to talk about most of the time. Here he is on Raw, January 13, 2003.

Steven Richards vs. Hurricane

Set up earlier, meaning Trish and Victoria are with the guys here. Steven’s suplex is countered and Hurricane takes him down with a clothesline. Hurricane hits the Blockbuster (minus most of the flip) and the Eye of the Hurricane for the pin in less than 90 seconds.

From Raw, September 8, 2003.

Scott Steiner vs. Steven Richards

Somehow Steiner has a job at this point. He also has Stacy who is his girlfriend/head freak at this point, which would change very soon. This is angle advancement for Steiner vs. Test, the latter of which is at ringside here. Richards tries to jump Steiner to start and gets pounded down in the corner as a result. There’s a clothesline for Richards and it’s push-up time. Richards gets a boot up in the corner but walks into a Downward Spiral for the pin. Nothing match here.

One more Raw match on May 3, 2004.

Kane vs. Steven Richards

Chokeslam, pin, 37 seconds.

So it’s pretty clear that a change is in order and thankfully that came in the form of JBL being a jerk and attacking Blue Meanie for real at One Night Stand 2005. The result was the BWO getting a PPV match at Great American Bash 2005.

Mexicools vs. BWO

Oh where do I begin. Ok so the Mexicools are Juvy, Psicosis and Super Crazy as really stereotypocal Mexicans (ride lawnmowers, carry rakes etc). The BWO is here because at One Night Stand, JBL legitimately beat up Blue Meanie. WWE gave Meanie a job for like two months so he didn’t sue them. This is their only match of note. The BWO comes out on big wheels for absolutely no apparent reason. American Chopper joke maybe?

Juvy vs. Nova starts us off. Things break down and the BWO takes over. Psicosis finally hits a corkscrew plancha to take over on Nova. Back to Juvy as Nova gets beaten down. He Hulks Up (NWO parody remember…..in 2005) and Cole messes up the BWO’s names. Hot tag brings in Richards who cleans house. Side slam gets two on Psicosis. Everything breaks down and Crazy hits a moonsault onto Richards followed by a guillotine legdrop by Psicosis for the pin.

Rating: F. This was on PPV. Once you get that through your heads, you’ll get why this was a failure.

Richards would be part of the new ECW, including this match on SNME XXXIII.

Sabu vs. Stevie Richards

And here’s your token ECW match that no one will care about. This is an extreme rules match thank goodness. Richards is talented if nothing else. He doesn’t get an entrance though so there we are. Sabu kind of hits a triple jump moonsault but kind of doesn’t which is a good result for him. It’s table time and an Arabian Facebuster later we’re done.

Rating: N/A. Sabu would be gone in a few weeks as Van Dam and he had gotten caught in the car with the pot and the kettle and the dinette set.

Here’s a slightly more competitive match on ECW on Sci-Fi, May 15, 2007.

CM Punk vs. Stevie Richards

Richards is very fired up here and Punk has taped up ribs. Punk fires off some kicks and nails a t-bone suplex for two. Stevie comes back with a knee to the ribs and rips off the tape to kick at the ribs even more. Off to a bow and arrow but Punk floats over and gets two off a jackknife cover. A double stomp to the rips gets two on Punk and we hit the abdominal stretch. Richards misses a charge in the corner and Punk fires off his usual kicks and knees but to the back. A neckbreaker out of the corner gets two and the GTS is good for the pin.

Rating: C. I liked this more than I thought I would as Richards was thinking out there by going after the injured body part. You would be surprised how many wrestlers would ignore the big taped up ribs and go after an arm or a leg. It’s such a basic idea and that’s all you need to do a lot of the time.

Richards would jump to TNA as a doctor (don’t ask), starting at Victory Road 2009.

Abyss vs. Stevie Richards

I’m in awe of how stupid this angle and character is but whatever. Abyss has just started wearing his current entrance attire that makes him look like a homeless man. Stevie has some kind of pipe or something and beats on Abyss with it. They continue to confuse me by calling him Stevie Richards and acknowledge his background in wrestling.

I’m not even going to rant about how stupid that is but whatever. Again we’re told how great Abyss can be. And again we ignore that he’s a former world champion. Are they ashamed of that or something? They say AJ is a former world champion here even though he had only won NWA Titles at this point. I really hate that clapping Abyss does.

It’s stupid when Christian does it but it’s just freaking idiotic when Abyss does it. We head into the crowd so we can kill off some time to go along with the brain cells. Seriously, what is the appeal of the monster being all child-like? Is that supposed to be interesting or funny or something? I’d assume it’s based off of being ironic or something but in order for irony to work it needs to be interesting which this just flat out isn’t.

Since it’s TNA, of course Stevie starts bleeding. That’s a real problem with TNA today: they think blood makes a match better. Blood can help a match, but only when it’s done both in moderation as well as properly. TNA has a real issue with it as they do it so often that it loses all effectiveness. The fans are insane and rather annoying here, wanting Stevie to get hurt more and more.

Somewhere a man named Lee is crying. And now it’s chair time because we need to kill off more time in this match. Just like the previous match, this is a glorified squash. He pulls Stevie up after two from Shock Treatment. Daffney brings Stevie a stun gun that he’s used lately. Instead he runs into a Black Hole Slam. He uses the tazer on him and smoke comes out of it. There’s the pin and I need a stiff drink.

Rating: D. This was even worse than the previous match as this one was even more of a squash. It was about 95% Abyss dominance which isn’t interesting at all. Then again neither of these guys are interesting characters so that likely has a lot to do with it. Richards as a doctor never quite worked.

Time for an ECW reunion show at Hardcore Justice 2010.

PJ Polaco vs. Stevie Richards

Richards has the BWO with them despite not being Big Stevie Cool here. The fans chant Polaco’s name (Justin Credible which I’ll be referring to him as) and then Stevie Richards. The fans want blood and an hour (almost) into it we haven’t had any. Justin hits a jumping spinning DDT which was one of his signature moves back in the day at least.

The fake Meanie is one of the Phi Delta Slam guys if anyone remembers them. He’s a security guard at times too. The matches here aren’t completely awful but this comes off as so low rent that it just can’t be taken seriously. And remember, this is TNA’s PPV offering this month. It’s not like the real PPV is next week or anything. This is it for August.

And That’s Incredible ends….nothing as Nova jumps up. Stevie Kick ends this in something that would NEVER have happened in the original company. The lights go out and Sandman is here to no music at all. White Russian Leg Sweep and Justin is back up before like a second. Cane shots put him down again.

Rating: D+. Not too bad here but the booking was just bad. I know Justin is crap but he was world champion for five months in the old days while Stevie was billed as a clueless putz. This didn’t work that well but it could have been FAR worse. Keep in mind that these grades are on an adjusted scale here as most of these would be fails or worse.

One final match at Bound For Glory 2010 with Richards as part of EV 2.0.

Fourtune vs. EV 2.0

This is a one ring WarGames match. A man from each team starts and after a set amount of time (5 minutes I think) there’s a coin toss and another guy comes in from the winning team. That goes on for two minutes then a guy from the losing team comes in. Two more minutes of that and then the winning team gets the advantage again. Alternate until all 8 are in and then we lower the roof, complete with weapons. No pins or submissions until everyone is in.

EV has Dreamer, Sabu, Rhyno, Richards and Raven. Yeah ten people in there great. Foley is with them. Flair brings out AJ, Storm, Roode, Kaz and Morgan. Fourtune has the advantage so screw the coin flip idea. Flair is in an undershirt. Oh dear.

The old guys go at it before the match starts and we try to figure out who starts the match. Kaz and Richards to start. Again Taz wants to say ECW and can’t do it. Kaz beats the heck out of him to start. And he continues doing so. Well that’s what you get for sending in Richards as your leadoff man.

Stevie gets a Downward Spiral into a modified Koji Clutch but AJ comes in seconds later to make it 2-1. Richards is of course in WAY over his head and gets destroyed. Figure four on Richards and he’s almost dead. Dreamer is in next. How in the world is this guy feuding with AJ Styles?

Dreamer spits mist or something at AJ as Richards gets back into it. All of Fourtune is in blue which is a cool idea I guess. Roode goes in third as this is going to take awhile to just get everyone in. Flair punches Dreamer through the camera hole. I love that thing as it gives you far better shots.

Sabu comes in and hooks a seated crossface chickenwing on AJ which we’ll call a camel clutch for fun I guess. This is REALLY slow now with EV controlling. Dreamer is bleeding fairly badly. Storm is in so it’ll be Morgan and Raven or Rhyno in last. Storm turns the tide and we get BEER MONEY!

With nothing left in the other minute here’s Raven who looks stupid with blonde hair. He cleans some house and shoves a snot rag in someone’s face. Ah ok it was Roode. Dreamer gets his crotch stepped on for fun. Dude seriously, Raven is your hot tag in essence? Roode is busted open.

Sabu is busted too. Morgan comes in as the final member of Fourtune. He drills Richards and drills Sabu back first into the cage. Dreamer takes the elbows in the corner as the advantage does the same thing it’s done the whole time so far. Raven is bleeding too so every member of EV who is in the match is busted.

Big Gore to Storm and here comes the roof. This is where the advantage is supposed to come for EV I guess. Flair and Foley get into it of course as is their custom. EV takes over and there are bigger weapons on top of the cage such as a table, a ladder and something else that I can’t make out.

Raven and Morgan beat the tar out of each other as EV is mostly in control. Morgan goes for the Carbon Footprint and misses, hitting the door which doesn’t move at all. Kaz gets drilled into the door and there it goes. Richards and Kaz go up and we set up the ladder up there. This always scared the living heck out of me.

Sabu dives through the door to take out Morgan and maybe Storm. Richards sets up the table on top of the cage and Kaz goes up the ladder and here’s Kendrick on top of the cage too. Kaz goes through the table and Kendrick appears to be meditating or something. In the ring Dreamer drills AJ in the leg and drops him on a chair, winning the match. Yes, EV won the match and everything seems to be fine with it. WELL OF COURSE THEY ARE.

Rating: D+. Not much here as there were a lot of very slow spots. Also the Kendrick thing just did nothing for it. The weapons were ok but the ending felt kind of tacked on. This never got to the level that they wanted it to get to and that hurt it a lot. This was one of the weaker matches they’ve done with this gimmick and I think a lot of that is due to the participants. Oh yeah. DID I MENTION EV 2.0 JUST FREAKING BEAT FOURTUNE and that TOMMY DREAMER PINNED AJ FREAKING STYLES??? And people wonder why this company can’t be taken seriously.

I’m going to wrap it up there because I don’t think I can manage to sit through Stevie Richards as champion of an ECW tribute promotion. Richards is a guy whose athletic abilities are underrated but his comedy stuff more than makes up for it. He’s a talented guy and found his niche as a goofy lackey to someone like Raven. The guy is good and nailed the role he was given most of the time.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today is a guy that found a character and ran with it for his entire career: Curtis Hughes.

Hughes got started in 1988 in the indies before making it to WCW as the generic monster Big Cat. We’ll pick things up at Clash of the Champions XIII.

Big Cat vs. Brad Armstrong

Big Cat is a large muscular man who would eventually become a bodyguard named Mr. Hughes. He wants Lex Luger in the near future. Cat runs Armstrong over with a shoulder and Brad isn’t sure what to do with him. Brad scores with a quick dropkick but runs into a backbreaker with two more thrown in as a bonus. Another hard shoulder block puts Brad on the mat and we hit the bearhug. That goes nowhere so Cat picks Brad up in Luger’s Torture Rack for the win via referee stoppage.

Rating: D+. Just a squash here to set up the Big Cat vs. Luger match. Cat had a good look and a lot of power but he felt like a monster of the month for Luger or Sting to vanquish down the line. It wasn’t a bad match and it did its job well enough, but there’s only so much quality you can pack into a four minute squash.

Hughes and his buddy Motor City Madman made the mistake of ticking off Sid Vicious. Here’s his punishment at Starrcade 1990.

Motor City Madman/Big Cat vs. Skyscrapers

The Skyscrapers are Sid Vicious, a Horseman at the moment, and Dan Spivey, who are two monsters who liked to destroy people. The Madman and Big Cat went after Sid on a recent Clash of the Champions, so tonight it’s a reunion with Spivey to hurt the annoying guys. It’s a big brawl to start with the Madman being sent to the apron. A double backdrop puts Cat down and a double powerbomb ends the Madman after about a minute. Total and complete domination here.

He would get a shot at the meaningless Six Man Tag Team Titles at WrestleWar 1991.

Six Man Tag Titles: Junkyard Dog/Ricky Morton/Tommy Rich vs. Stage Patrol/Big Cat

Where do I even start? Ok so odds are you haven’t heard of these titles before, and there’s a good reason for that: they were only around for less than nine months. The titles were first won seven days before this show at a live event. Now one might ask why they didn’t have the first champions crowned here on PPV. It’s WCW in 1991. There’s your answer and it’ll answer most of your questions. The State Patrol is Sgt. Buddy Lee Parker and Lt. James Earl Wright, who is most famous for being one half of the State Patrol. Big Cat is Mr. Hughes and he’s one of the challengers here.

Cat and Dog start things off. I think you can see JYD’s gut expanding from here. He hits Cat with some headbutts and it’s off to Morton and Wright. Morton speeds things up with armdrags and it’s off to Rich. Rich slams him down and hooks an armdrag followed by an armbar. Off to Parker who gets the exact same treatment. Back to Morton for some atomic drops and then back to the same armbar again.

The Dog comes back in to crank up the fat levels of this match. Big Cat comes in again and wants a test of strength. That goes nowhere so it’s back to Morton to face the State Patrol on his own. The numbers catch up with him and it’s time for Morton to start selling. Parker drop toeholds him down and Cat hits an elbow for two. Dropkick gets two. Morton slugs back against Parker but gets powerslammed down for two.

The State Patrol keeps up the double teaming, hitting a bulldog for two. Back to Parker as I’m seeing why this team never went anywhere. Cat comes back in for a big old backbreaker for two. Parker misses a charge and there’s the hot tag to JYD. He hits the Thump (powerslam) but Cat makes the save. In a smart move, Morton immediately dives on Parker and gets the pin to retain.

Rating: D. Technically this was barely passable but what in the world was the point to this match? On second thought what was the point to these titles? The match wasn’t any good as it was in essence just a bad TV main event, which doesn’t exactly fire me up for the rest of the show. This was an odd choice all around.

Around this time Big Cat would become Big Cat Hughes and start wrestling in a nice shirt, suspenders and sunglasses. His character was a bodyguard, which he would stick with for the rest of his career. We’ll start things off in Japan at the WCW/New Japan Supershow I.

Big Cat Hughes vs. El Gigante

This is out of order for some reason as this is supposed to be the Steiners tag match. Hughes is for once not the bodyguard character. Gigante is more commonly known as Giant Gonzalez and is about 3-4 inches taller than Khali. He also has about 1/3 of the talent. To give you an idea of his size, when he’s on the floor his head is over the top rope. When he’s in the ring his tights (half shorts) nearly go above the top rope. Where the top turnbuckle would be is the height of his crotch, as in about the chest/shoulders of a guy the height of Cena.

Fonzie of ECW fame is the referee. This is more or less a squash as Hughes is about 315lbs and Gigante slams him with one arm after holding him up for awhile. He sets for a suplex and literally, as in I timed it, holds him in a front facelock while playing to the crowd for 34 seconds before doing anything. Hughes couldn’t step on his foot or something in 34 seconds? Really? A jumping boot sets up the Claw Hold to end it.

Back to America for a Lethal Lottery tag match at Starrcade 1991.

Big Van Vader/Mr. Hughes vs. Rick Steiner/Nightstalker

Nightstalker is a big man who did nothing of note for years until he became Adam Bomb in the WWF. He’s also subbing for the injured Diamond Stud here. Hughes is Big Cat from last year and now a big security guard in a suit. Vader is a monster, weighing 400lbs and running through everyone he ever faces. Rick and Vader start which is probably the best solution for everyone. Vader pounds him upside the head and clotheslines Steiner down before running him over with ease.

Rick gets back up and pounds away with right hands and a Steiner Line to send Vader to the floor. Back in and Steiner somehow manages to suplex Vader down but hurts himself. Hughes, the smaller man on the team at 6’8 and 375lbs, gets the tag. Steiner easily backdrops him down but is hesitant to tag in Nightstalker. A belly to back suplex puts Hughes down but Nightstalker reaches over and tags himself in. He doesn’t pay attention to Vader and is run over by a clothesline. Rick doesn’t realize he was tagged and Vader splashes Nightstalker for the pin.

Rating: D+. I’m a sucker for the Steiners throwing big people around and that’s what we got here. The match was nothing of note, but it was more along the lines of setting up a match between the Steiners and Hughes/Vader, which I don’t remember ever actually happening. Nightstalker was clearly in over his head here, but to be fair he was a replacement.

Here’s that same formula on steroids at Clash of the Champions XVIII.

Steiner Brothers vs. Mr. Hughes/Big Van Vader

Vader makes his Clash in ring debut here and looks like a total monster. He’s about 6’4 and weighs over 400lbs, making Mr. Hughes the smaller member of the team. Scott and Hughes get things going with Hughes wrestling in a suit and suspenders. Hughes is easily taken down twice in a row but gets in a shot to the ribs to take over. He runs Scott over with a shoulder block but Scott comes back with a great looking overhead belly to belly suplex, sending Hughes out to the floor.

Vader comes in and easily throws the Steiners to the floor, so the Brothers come back in with a double clothesline from the same corner to fire the crowd up all over again. Off to Rick with a headlock on Vader but the monster easily slams him down. A quick suplex drops Rick again and Vader just pummels him in the face. Vader easily picks him up for a gorilla press but Rick comes out of the corner with the Steiner Line and a belly to belly suplex.

Another Steiner Line puts Vader on the floor, only to have him come back in with a hard clothesline of his own. Vader goes up top but Rick nails him with a right hand and a belly to belly superplex to bring Vader down. Back to Scott for a German suplex as the crowd is just amazed by these throws. Vader catches a charging Scott in a powerslam before sitting on his chest to break up a sunset flip attempt.

Hughes comes in again but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Rick to come back in off the tag. One of the highest backdrops you’ll ever see puts Hughes down again and everything breaks down. Vader accidentally nails Hughes with a clothesline and Rick hits the top rope bulldog for the pin.

Rating: B. The Steiners continue to do things that should not be humanly possible with those suplexes. Seeing Scott easily throw Vader and Hughes around like that is something that almost has to be seen to be believed and Rick’s were hardly anything to look down on. Awesome stuff here and a great way to wake up the crowd early on.

One more WCW match at WrestleWar 1992.

Mr. Hughes/Cactus Jack vs. Ron Simmons/Junkyard Dog

No idea why Hughes is there instead of Abdullah but whatever. Cactus jumps JYD on the way to the ring and beats the living tar out of him. And people wonder why I love Foley. Being this insane wasn’t done back in the day so Jack was definitely a scary character back then. Simmons was a hot thing back then and would be world champion in the fall. JYD gets taken off so this more or less becomes a singles match.

Mr. Hughes vs. Ron Simmons

Officially isn’t a handicap but Jack is acting like a manager here. You could really tell they were getting the idea of how useful Foley could be around this time and it worked. Simmons beats them both up and I’m sure this had nothing to do with the racial issues going on behind the scenes at this point. I always liked him back then though as he was kind of a Rock like character as he was a beast athletically but not much on the mic at all.

We get a Bill Watts reference but I don’t think he had taken over yet. Hughes was a guy that I never got the appeal of but he did his job very well as a big monster that anyone could bring in for a quick feud with a face. This is a glorified squash for Simmons as there was no way he was going to lose here. Simmons hits a spinebuster and after Cactus comes in a shot to the knee ends it. Kind of weird.

Rating: D+. Nothing that special here but it was a way to get Simmons over which was the idea here. It was also less than six minutes long which was a good thing for them here as Hughes was never really that good. Jack vs. Simmons would turn out to be a decent little match and feud but it never went anywhere due to Watts and the NWA screwing it up.

Hughes would sign with the WWF as the monster bodyguard in 1993. Here’s one of his first Raw matches on May 31, 1993.

Mr. Hughes vs. Bert Centeno

Hughes throws Bert around with ease before hammering away at his back. A big boot gets two with Hughes pulling him up at two. Mr. chokes on the mat and finishes with a Boss Man Slam. Total squash.

Off to the 1993 King of the Ring.

First Round: Mr. Hughes vs. Mr. Perfect

Perfect gets a very nice pop. Heenan being sick of Perfect is great too. Savage keeps referring to this as the finals for some reason. Hughes beat Kamala and Perfect had to beat Doink three times to get here. Heenan goes on a rant about how he made perfect and Ross just says wrong. That was great. Hughes is of course dominating but he’s just not that good at all.

He’s very limited in the ring but to be fair for someone his size there’s only so much he even has to do. Perfect bumps on a level that is usually only reserved for Shawn and Flair. Bret is shown in an inset about who he’d rather face and he actually gives an answer, saying he would rather fight Perfect.

That’s not something you hear that often. Perfect makes his comeback and actually hits a backdrop on Hughes. It kind of sucked but there we are. In a very stupid ending, Hughes just grabs the urn and blasts Perfect with it. Well ok then that’s one way to end it. That was dumb.

Rating: D+. This was just bad. Hughes just flat out wasn’t interesting at all as he was such an incredibly bland character. I mean seriously, he’s a bodyguard for hire. At least with Diesel they weren’t mercenaries but were characterized as the main guy’s friends. Hughes was the main guy and that’s just a failure. Perfect did everything he could out there, but he can’t make a good match out of nothing, and that’s what he was asked to do here.

Hughes wouldn’t last long in the WWF as he would head to ECW soon after as Shane Douglas’ bodyguard. Here’s a match from some point in 1994.

911 vs. Curtis Hughes

They stare each other down and talk a lot of trash to start before a collision goes nowhere. Hughes hammers away to take over before hitting a pretty good chokeslam for two. 911 Hulks Up but a low blow puts him right back down. Curtis Hughes loads up the Boss Man Slam but 911 just stops him cold. A HUGE chokeslam (and remember that Hughes is probably about 400lbs) gives 911 the pin.

Rating: D+. That chokeslam at the end brought this way up. This was basically a battle of the bodyguards so the match was only going to be so good. It’s also a good thing that they kept this really short instead of letting them bore everyone to death. 911 wasn’t much to see but when he started beating people up, he could be very fun.

After several years on the indies (and some time as HHH’s bodyguard where he didn’t wrestle on TV), Hughes would return to the WWF in 1999. Here he on Raw, September 13, 1999.

Chris Jericho vs. Gotch Gracie

Gotch is in a mask. Jericho has only been around for about two weeks at this point. He’s feuding with Ken Shamrock to start, so this is inside a cage against a Gracie. You MMA fans will get the joke. Jericho quickly takes him down to start and cranks on the leg to make Gracie tap. That’s not enough for Jericho though so he puts on an abdominal stretch and lets it go before Gracie can tap. A brainbuster gets the posing cover for two before the Liontamer gets the real submission. Total joke of course but I chuckled.

Gracie would unmask as Mr. Hughes, setting up this match on Smackdown, September 16, 1999.

Curtis Hughes vs. Ken Shamrock

Hughes now wrestles in a shiny blue shirt with no sleeves. Jericho brings out El Dopo to referee, which may or may not be Jericholic Howard Finkel under a mask. Shamrock charges the ring to double leg Hughes and hammer away. Hughes backdrops him out to the floor and sends him into the barricade.

It doesn’t have a ton of effect though as Shamrock throws him into the post and steps. He makes the mistake of chasing Jericho though, allowing Hughes to take over. Jericho chokes with a rope as Dopo watches on. Back in and Hughes drops an elbow but gets caught in the ankle lock. Curtis grabs the ropes and Dopo DQ’s Shamrock after about half a second.

Rating: D. More angle advancement here with Jericho ticking Shamrock off before their showdown at Unforgiven. There wasn’t much to the match but there wasn’t supposed to be. Hughes did his thing here and there’s nothing wrong with a guy there for one single idea, especially when he looks as tough as Curtis.

Jericho and Hughes would team up on Heat, October 10, 1999.

Dudley Boys vs. Chris Jericho/Curtis Hughes

The Dudleys are brand new here as well. D-Von and Hughes get things going with the Dudley nailing a big shoulder block. Hughes comes back with a clothesline and brings in Jericho to face Bubba. Chris hammers him down and hits the Lionsault for no cover. Back to Hughes who walks into a sidewalk slam for two as the announcers talk about some mud wrestling from Raw. Hughes runs over D-Von until Bubba trips him up to take over. Jericho calls Hughes an idiot and I don’t see this ending well for him. Curtis goes over for a tag and Chris walks out. The 3D ends this quick.

Rating: D+. This was the beginning of the end for Hughes but it’s not like he was going to last long either way. That’s the kind of character he has: someone you bring in for a few weeks to advance a character and then let him go. The Dudleys were still getting things together in the WWF but they would take off soon.

From the next night on Raw.

Headbangers vs. Curtis Hughes/Chris Jericho

Mosh launches Jericho into a hotshot to start before throwing him into the Tree of Woe. Off to Thrasher who gets caught in a butterfly backbreaker before Hughes comes in for a headlock. The Headbangers take him into the corner for some stomping but Hughes comes back with a clothesline to Mosh. Back to Jericho who grabs the Walls but Thrasher makes the save. A double flapjack plants Jericho and Hughes tries to make a save, only to hit his partner. Jericho decks Hughes and walks out again, setting up the worst Stage Dive (powerbomb/legdrop combo) I’ve ever seen for the pin.

Rating: D. I think we’ve covered this already.

Here’s the blowoff on Smackdown, October 14, 1999.

Chris Jericho vs. Curtis Hughes

They slug it out in the aisle to start with Jericho sending him into the steps before the bell. A missile dropkick gets two but Hughes hammers away in the corner. Jericholic Howard Finkel slides in a chair and offers a distraction so Jericho can blast Hughes in the head for the pin.

As I said, Hughes is a guy that took a very basic character and ran with it for years. He’s still on the indies (minus about 150lbs) as the same character and it’s going to work until he retires. It’s such a basic character that you can work it into a ton of stories and that’s something very good to fall back on. His matches weren’t great but he played his role very well and looked intimidating.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today is your Olympic hero and mine, Kurt Angle.

No timeline today as it’s just a bunch of awesome Kurt matches.

We’ll start things off with one heck of a tag team match from No Mercy 2002.

Smackdown Tag Titles: Rey Mysterio/Edge vs. Chris Benoit/Kurt Angle

This was the undisputed match of the year so this more or less has to be awesome. Edge is about as hot as possible here and Rey is pretty new here. Yeah he had been around only three months or so here. Edge is just straight up awesome here and the whole thing is just greatness. Angle vs. Rey to start us off. We have what, about 25 world titles in there? Angle takes him to the mat and slaps him in the back of the head to be a jerk.

Kurt is really the only heel in this match. He literally throws Rey into his own corner because he wants a grownup apparently. Rey won’t tag out though because he wants Angle. They had a great opener at Summerslam so this works for me. Rey can’t get out of much of anything so he steps on Kurt’s foot and hits him with what can only be called an FU.

He busts out the speed and slaps Angle in the back of the head just like Kurt did earlier. The announce table being in pieces is funny for some reason. Here’s Edge to a big old pop. This is before Edge hurt his neck so he’s a totally different worker here. Off to Benoit now. Expect a LOT of play by play here as if the reviews I’ve heard are any indication there isn’t going to be much to make fun of.

The Canadians do a much more technical sequence and it’s a lot more entertaining than you would think a side headlock should be. Edge gets a knee to Benoit’s ribs and focuses on them for a while. Flapjack and a rollup get two. And there’s a knee from Kurt as Edge hits the ropes to give Benoit an advantage. They try the same thing again but Edge spears him this time.

Benoit and Angle double team Edge in a very nice sequence. Back to Angle now. The fans are all over him which is always good to hear. Better for them to be making noise at all than to be bored. Rear naked choke to Edge and Rey is getting antsy. Tazz adds in something by saying Angle is making sure Edge is facing his partner to mess with his head. Nicely done Mr. suplex machine.

Edge gets a big boot but walks into a belly to belly for two and here’s Chris again. Here are the rolling Germans as Edge is getting the tar beaten out of him. Benoit goes a little heel by drilling Rey to keep him from making the save. Benoit goes up for the headbutt and down he comes off a big old superplex.

There’s the big tag to Rey and he cranks things WAY up. The good thing is that he’s in there against two guys that can do the same thing. He sets Benoit for a Bronco Buster but goes with a running dropkick instead. HUH-FREAKING-ZAH! Rey and Benoit crank things up ever more but Benoit gets a counter and hooks up the Crossface until Edge finally saves.

Edge vs. Angle on the floor along with Benoit and Rey in the ring. 619 is blocked by Benoit but Edge hits a missile dropkick to drive Rey onto Benoit for a long two. This is all happening at a very fast pace. Rey goes up but Angle JUMPS from the mat to the top for the HUGE belly to belly off the top for another long two. Benoit’s face is like WHAT at that.

Angle in now vs. Rey as things slow down a bit. Rey starts a bit of a comeback but gets caught in a quick suplex and crashes for two. Back to the short and crazy Canadian now. After more of a beating Rey gets a headscissors to send Benoit into the post and we get double tags to bring in Edge vs. Kurt. Edge-O-Matic gets two and everyone is back in again.

Spear in the corner to Benoit and there’s the Bronco Buster. I withdraw my former HUZZAH! Spear in the corner again to Angle and Edge sits him on the middle rope. Rey runs at Edge who throws him into the air for a big old rana. Benoit looks to save with the diving headbutt but it crushes Angle and only gets two. Angle busts out a German from nowhere for two. He shouts at Edge to go to the middle which Edge does.

In a VERY nice spot, Rey runs at Edge who belly to bellies him into Angle to take down the bald one. That’s what he gets for calling spots that loudly. Benoit saves the spear and grabs the Crossface and Edge is in trouble but he gets a rope. He won’t let go so Rey hits a 619 out of somewhere. Angle Slam takes out Rey and Angle locks on the ankle lock.

Edge kicks off and grabs a small package for two. Spear gets two as Benoit saves and Rey takes out Benoit. Rey gets a running start at Edge again and Edge catches him and gives him a very nice launch into a moonsault to take out Benoit. SICK counter out of the Edgecution by Angle into the ankle lock. Edge counters that into an ankle lock of his own but Angle is all like OH NO YOU DIDN’T and counters into an ankle lock for the tap out and the titles. Sweet goodness as Cole says he’s going to applaud them for it.

Rating: A+. OH YES. Now this is what you get when you have two teams out there that are young and moving as fast as they can to make something look awesome. Smackdown was supposed to be the wrestling show back then and it certainly was. This would be part of a series of matches that made Smackdown completely awesome around this time and it was a treat to watch.

Angle had one of the best triple threats ever at Vengeance 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Big Show vs. Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar

Ok so if Show is knocked out for most of this it should be good. This was around the time where Brock was completely awesome and could do no wrong. This is no DQ also. When has a triple threat not been no DQ? Show is in the singlet and shorts now which are perfectly acceptable. Angle and Lesnar work together but Lesnar takes a chokeslam a minute in. Angle was at the point here where he could get a good match out of anyone and he’s showing why here.

Angle busts out some garbage can lids and they beat the heck out of Big Show with them. All three of these guys are just SCARY strong. They manage a double chokeslam. Ok, that was cool. And there’s an F5 to Angle. And there’s one for Show. That never ceases to amaze me, and that doesn’t happen often. Angle gets beaten down on the floor and we get Brock vs. Show. Brock looks more awesome with the elbow pads. Brock gets a running powerbomb out of the corner. WOW.

Angle comes back in and pops the tar out of Brock with a chair. Angle is getting into that zone. Oh and he’s bleeding. It’s table time and Taz makes me laugh by saying about the Spanish announcers “You would think they’d be used to it by now.” That was good. Angle Slam through the table. The announcers point out that it might have been stupid to knock him out on the floor though which is very true. Brock is bleeding now and we have him vs. Angle. This works.

Other than Benoit, Lesnar brings out the best in Angle and that’s saying a lot. After a little bit of them beating the heck out of each other, Brock locks in a body scissors and a chokeout similar to a Tazmission actually. Even Taz points that out. Show comes in for a double chokeslam and actually gets Lesnar with the left arm higher than Angle with the right arm. Since that doesn’t work, Angle comes back with Angle Slams for both and gets the pin on Brock. Very good match to close the show.

Rating: A-. I’m not big on triple threats but this was great. Brock and Angle are just freaking fun to see beat the tar out of each other since Brock could keep up with Angle on the mat and Angle could match Brock’s strength for the most part. Big Show was solid here too which made this just a great match all around. Very fun match and well worth seeing.

We better get a World Title on him. From No Mercy 2000.

WWF Title: The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

This is announced as No DQ as Kurt comes to the ring which is a new development. Stephanie distracts Rock and Angle gets a quick advantage to start. Angle gets a chair shot on the floor and Rock is in trouble. Back in the ring a Samoan Drop gets two for the champion. Angle tries to leave for some reason but Rock makes the stop. Rock throws him through the set as this is a big brawl.

Ross says that Angle is challenging for the richest prize in the Game. Is this suddenly a match taking place inside of HHH? Is the belt his pancreas or something? Stephanie chokes Rock behind the referee’s back as Ross says she’s legally breaking the rules. If it’s legal, how is she still breaking the rules? Rock gets a chair shot to his ankle. This was before the ankle lock I think.

Dragon screw leg whip sets up the Sharpshooter and he taps out as Stephanie has the referee. Angle is continuously selling the knee having it start off as a big hindrance and moving on to a slightly weaker one which is very impressive. He gets a long chinlock to kill some time but winds up on the floor and we’re back outside again.

Angle tries to get a belt shot while Stephanie gets the referee. I don’t get the whole thinking here but they’re trying at least. Angle misses the perfect moonsault and we slug it out. Rock punches the tar out of him and takes over again. Again might be a stretch but you get the idea. A spinebuster sets for the Elbow but Stephanie makes the save. Rock Bottom for her but Angle stops the elbow.

And cue HHH who destroys….Kurt. Ah there’s the Pedigree for the Rock too. That’s more like it. HHH carries Stephanie out as Angle covers for two and a big pop on the kickout. Rock gets a DDT for two as you can feel us getting to the ending. He sends Angle to the floor, walks around the ring with him and throws him back in. Even Rock can have an odd moment I guess.

Here’s Rikishi too as they continue trying to force this push down our throats no matter how hard it fails. He beats on Angle a bit as apparently he’s helping out his Samoan brethren. Rock Bottom out of nowhere but Rock can’t cover. The fat Samoan gets in and accidently nails Rock in the corner and accidently superkicks him. Both guys get Olympic Slams to give Angle his first of 9 (not 12 idiotic TNA) world titles to date.

Rating: B. This was of course solid as you would expect for these two. Angle was still kind of in over his head at this point as he hadn’t locked in that total insanity thing yet. The Rikishi interference was annoying but I get the HHH aspect at least. Amusingly enough Angle won the title once Stephanie left rather than while she was there. Solid match but their rematch in February where Rock would get the title back would be better.

So there was a pay per view five days after September 11 and Angle was in his hometown and challenging for the WWF Title. Has there ever been a more perfect set up? From Unforgiven 2001.

WWF World Title: Kurt Angle vs. Steve Austin

Angle gets the hometown boy pop and Fink milks it perfectly. “From PITTSBURGH PENNSYLVANIA!” Angle meets him on the ramp and here we go. Austin is hammered down and Angle is all fired up. The champ is all afraid to try the Stunner because either it won’t work or the kick to set it up could result in an ankle lock. Angle hits a Thesz Press and hammers away in the corner.

We head to the floor and Austin is reeling. Austin blocks a superplex but Kurt is like oh yes you are going and hits it on the second attempt. Austin grabs a sleeper but gets countered by a jawbreaker. He tries to leave with the title but Angle catches up to him and throws Austin off the ramp just like Austin did to him a few weeks ago. Angle puts him against the railing and pounds him down with punches and chops.

Kurt picks Austin up and carries him back to the ring, ramming him into the post. We’re seven minutes into this and it’s been 95% Angle. He stops to peel back the mats and Austin gets a knee to the back to take over. Piledriver on the floor doesn’t work and Austin is cut above the eye. Angle chops away and tries an Olympic piledriver but is backdropped as well.

Angle tries a suplex out there but Austin reverses and drops him onto the table. He does it again and the table is sturdy. Here’s a third try and it STILL doesn’t break. That’s a good table! Austin drives knees to the neck back inside. He talks trash to Kurt’s family in the front row which is why he’s a great heel: he knows how to get a crowd riled up which so few people today know how to do.

Off to the chinlock and I’m cool with that as they’ve been going hard for almost 15 minutes. Austin pounds on the back but gets caught in the Germans. It’s just three this time but Kurt is holding his neck. Austin tries a super belly to back but Kurt reverses into a bad looking cross body for two.

Release spinebuster puts Angle down and Austin kicks him in the little Olympians. The referee is shoved so Angle kicks Austin low to even things up. A DDT sends Austin to the floor and we’re running out of time. This has been pretty good but it’s certainly no classic. Back in Angle stuns Austin for two. Austin hits a belly to back suplex called the Angle Slam. I mean he didn’t even try to change it. A piledriver gets a close two and Austin is getting mad. He loads up the Stunner but Angle grabs the boot and the ankle lock gives Angle the title.

Rating: B. The match was certainly good but it’s not on the level I think they were hoping for. It never quite hit that level of intensity and violence and Angle’s neck injury didn’t quite live up to the amount of intensity that I think it was supposed to. Definitely good though, just not a classic.

Undertaker vs. The Rock vs. Kurt Angle

Taker wants to fight Rock but is afraid to actually do anything about it. Angle shoves both guys and wants to fight which earns him a double beatdown. Rock clotheslines him out to the floor, leaving himself all alone with Undertaker. Taker pounds Rock in the corner but Rock makes a quick comeback with right hands of his own. Angle is knocked off the apron and out to the floor but he pulls the champion out with him, sending Taker into the steps.

It’s Rock vs. Angle now and there’s a belly to belly for the Brahma Bull. Angle chops away in the corner and drops Rock with another suplex. A DDT gets two for Rock and Angle rolls to the floor. Rock goes out as well leaving only the referee in the ring. Undertaker pops up and takes Angle’s head off with a clothesline and heads back inside to pound on Rock. Angle is punched off the apron by Undertaker but the champion walks into a chokeslam from Rock (you read that right) for two.

Angle is back in now but gets taken down and put in the ankle lock by the other challenger. Kurt pops up and Rock Bottoms the Rock for two as Undertaker makes the save. Angle tries the Slam on Undertaker but Taker escapes and hits the Angle Slam on Kurt. Rock nips up and sends Angle to the floor before hitting the spinebuster and People’s Elbow on Taker. Kurt pulls Rock out of the ring again and gets two on Taker, only to be launched into the corner and pounded on by the champ.

Kurt fights back but misses a charge, going shoulder first into the post, sending him out to the floor. Undertaker sends him face first into the post for good measure but here’s Rock with a spit of water into Taker’s face to slow him down. The champ throws Rock over the announcer’s table but here’s a busted open Kurt to keep things moving. Taker slugs him down again though and drops a leg on the apron before heading back inside. Old School puts Angle down but Rock makes another save.

Rock still can’t get any extended offense on Undertaker though as the champion hits a running DDT for two. Angle grabs a chair but Taker punches him down. Kurt gets ping ponged back and forth between the other guy guys, only to have Rock hit Undertaker low to put him down. That plus a chair shot to the head put Undertaker down and Angle lays out Rock with the Slam as well. A slightly damaged referee counts two on each guy for Angle but there’s the Sharpshooter from Rock to Kurt.

Taker makes a quick save with a big boot to Rock’s face and hits the Last Ride powerbomb but Kurt breaks up the cover with the ankle lock. Undertaker finally rolls through to counter and we get the same sequence from the July 4^th show with Angle countering the powerbomb into the choke. Angle gets his shoulder up and even another powerbomb can’t break the hold.

Undertaker doesn’t tap but his arm is lifted and dropped twice in a row. Rock makes the save but gets caught in the ankle lock but Rock rolls Angle up for two. There’s the chokeslam to Angle but Taker gets a Rock Bottom for two. Angle hits the Slam on Undertaker and takes down the straps but walks into the Rock Bottom for the pin and the title.

Rating: B. Sometimes the solution to the problems a wrestling company is having is to have a good wrestling match. Instead of the old and slow guys in the world title scene, this had two young guys who could move very well out there to bounce off Undertaker’s power moves. This is easily the best PPV title match so far this year other than maybe Rock vs. Jericho.

We’ll jump back to the midcard for a bit at Wrestlemania XVI.

Intercontinental Title/European Title: Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit vs. Chris Jericho

This is an interesting idea. Angle holds both titles coming in and there are going to be two falls here. The first is for the Intercontinental Title and the second is for the European Title, so basically we’re getting back to back triple threats. Jericho guarantees to walk out of this match as the Ayatollah of Rock and Rollah while the other two will walk out with a shirt that complains about how lousy the shirt is as well as how bad the beating from Jericho was.

Benoit jumps Angle before the bell before heading inside for a clothesline from his fellow Canadian. All three are in now and Benoit chops Jericho, only to have his belly to back suplex escaped. Benoit breaks up a springboard dropkick by Jericho before fighting with Angle on the apron. Jericho hits the previously broken up dropkick to send both guys out to the floor. He joins them immediately, only to be sent into the steps by Kurt. Back in and a belly to belly suplex gets two for Angle on Jericho.

Jericho hits a backbreaker on Angle but Benoit shoves Jericho off the top and into the announce table for good measure. Benoit covers Angle for two before suplexing him down for the same. Jericho is back in for a dropkick to his fellow Canadian but Benoit comes right back with a clothesline for two more. Jericho bulldogs Angle down but Benoit comes back with chops of his own on the other Chris. Angle suplexes Benoit down but Jericho makes the save. Very back and forth action so far.

Jericho camel clutches Benoit but has to break it up to stop a charging Kurt. Angle hits a big suplex on Jericho for two as Benoit makes another save. Benoit rolls up Jericho in the corner but Angle dropkicks his head face first into the middle buckle to break it up. Jericho loads up a double arm suplex on Angle but gets countered into a crossface chickenwing. Benoit comes back in and dropkicks Angle before sending him to the floor and into the barricade. Back in and the Swan Dive to Jericho gives Benoit the first fall and the Intercontinental Title.

Very wisely Benoit immediately covers Jericho for an attempt at the European Title but it only gets two as Kurt dives in for the save. Angle suplexes Benoit down for two but takes too long on the moonsault attempt, allowing Jericho to break it up. Jericho loads up a belly to back superplex but Benoit supelxes Chris down, allowing Angle to miss the moonsault on Benoit. All three guys are down now until Angle covers Benoit for two. Jericho gets back into it with a Walls attempt on Angle, only to have the other Chris break it up.

Everyone gets back up and it’s Jericho with a spinwheel kick to take Benoit to the floor. The double powerbomb puts Angle down but Benoit comes back in for the Rolling Germans on Jericho. Benoit goes old school with a Dragon Supelx on Angle for two. Jericho hits the forearm on the referee by mistake, only to be put in the Crossface by the new IC Champion.

It gets an unseen tapout but Benoit releases, allowing Jericho to put Benoit in the Walls. Angle hits Jericho with a title belt but Benoit makes the save as the referee is awake again. Benoit suplexes Angle down again but misses the Swan Dive. Jericho slides in for the Lionsault on Benoit for the European Title to end things.

Rating: B+. Awesome match here which would have been match of the year when this style dominated in 2003. All three guys were the future generation of the company once we shifted to the technical style over on Smackdown in a few years, but here it’s just awesome instead of a match of the times. This is one of the only things that people remember from this show and with good reason: it was awesome.

The next year later Angle had a one on one match with Benoit that had people drooling.

Kurt Angle vs. Chris Benoit

On his way to the ring, Angle rips on Texas for various reasons, primarily the lone star flag. Oh and cowboy hats are stupid. This match was made on Raw because neither guy had anything to do for Wrestlemania. It’s as simple as it sounds, but do you need anything more than that for this pairing? Angle still insists that he didn’t tap out to Benoit on Raw. Heyman: “This is as excited as a man can get with his clothes on.”

Angle takes it to the mat to start which is fine with Benoit as the struggle begins. Benoit sits out and it’s a standoff, drawing a nice ovation from the crowd. It worked so well before that they do it again, drawing a bigger ovation this time. Angle hits a kind of suplex to take it to the mat for a third time but Benoit sits out again as they fight for position. They roll into the ropes for another break and the fans are pleased yet again.

Benoit takes it to the mat again and tries the Crossface, sending Angle into the safety of the ropes. Kurt bails to the floor for a breather as he isn’t sure what to do with Benoit here. Back in and Angle has to get to a rope to escape another Crossface attempt. Angle blasts Benoit with a right hand to shift the style and momentum here as they head outside. Benoit goes first into the announce table and shoulder first into the steps to keep Kurt in control.

Back in and Angle gets two off a belly to back suplex. A belly to belly gets no cover by Kurt and neither does the second one Angle hits in a row. Benoit comes back with a clothesline as the only advantage of the match so far is gone. Benoit starts slugging away in the corner before hitting a knee to Angle’s ribs. A back elbow to Angle’s face gets two as does a snap suplex ala Dynamite Kid. Benoit follows up with a superplex and holds his neck afterwards. He would be about three months from neck surgery that put him out for over a year.

Speaking of neck injuring suplexes, Benoit rolls some Germans but Angle rolls through the third one into the ankle lock. Benoit escapes that into an ankle lock of his own for good measure. The stealing finishers was one of Angle’s major deals so this shouldn’t be a surprise. Benoit tries the Crossface but Angle blocks it from going on full. Angle puts Benoit in the Crossface for good measure but Benoit gets a foot on the ropes.

Angle accidentally charges into the referee, just before Benoit puts Angle in the Crossface for an unseen tap out. Benoit releases the hold and gets caught in the Angle Slam for two. Angle’s moonsault hits Benoit’s knees, allowing Benoit to go up for the Swan Dive. That gets two, but Angle rolls through and hooks the tights for the win.

Rating: B+. It’s Angle vs. Benoit at Wrestlemania. Did you expect this to be anything less than awesome? This wasn’t as good as their masterpiece at the 2003 Rumble, but it would be a match of the year candidate on any other show. That’s what you expect from these two though, and this is an excellent match that is overshaddowed by the rematches they would have later.

Time to open the other best show ever. From Summerslam 2002.

Kurt Angle vs. Rey Mysterio

Rey beat Angle in a tag match and has been an annoyance for him lately. This is right after Mysterio debuted as part of probably the best year for new talent in company history. In 2002 WWE got Mysterio, Brock Lesnar, Batista, Randy Orton and a guy named Cena. This is when Rey’s knees weren’t held together by glue so it should be awesome. Rey comes in from behind and takes Angle down with a quick springboard dropkick but he has to go to the ropes to escape the ankle lock. An early 619 attempt misses and Angle pulls him to the floor. Very fast start.

Angle kicks at the leg as they come back in. An uppercut staggers Rey and a wheelbarrow suplex puts him down. Rey grabs the rope to avoid a German and gets a quick two off a rollup. Kurt gets two off a backbreaker and bends Rey’s back around the ropes. The fans are all over Angle but he shrugs off some forearms and catches a headscissors into a side slam for two.

Off to a wicked half crab on Rey but he somehow sneaks out and gets two off a rollup. Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline, only to get caught in a jawbreaker. Rey tries to speed things up but walks into the overhead belly to belly. There go the straps but Rey armdrags out of the Angle Slam and sends Angle to the floor. Rey loads up a dive but the referee stops him, drawing the most heat of the night. Mysterio will have none of that and dives OVER THE REFEREE to take Angle out.

Back in and a springboard legdrop gets two as the crowd is on fire. Rey tries a victory roll but gets caught in the ankle lock. Mysterio rolls out and send Angle to the ropes for the 619. The West Coast Pop gets a VERY close two and a spinwheel kick puts Angle down again. Mysterio goes up top but Angle runs the ropes for the suplex, only to have Rey flip over him but he tweaks the ankle on the landing. He’s fine enough to pop back up and dropkick Angle on the corner though and he loads up a hurricanrana. Angle falls forward on it though and the ankle lock is good for the submission.

Rating: A-. EXCELLENT opener here with Mysterio showing he could hang with anyone in the company. He really was amazing to watch when he wasn’t banged up and bloated like he is today and this might be his best match ever. This was a great choice for an opener and both guys looked amazing.

So a dancing Samoan, a Cerebral Assassin, a beer drinking redneck, an undead biker and a brahma bull walk into Hell in a Cell. Who else could possibly survive this but Kurt Angle? From Armageddon 2000.

WWF Title: HHH vs. The Rock vs. Undertaker vs. Steve Austin vs. Rikishi vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is champion here. I remember the buildup for this and the question being who would take the huge bump. It more or less came down to Rock or HHH as Taker was too big, Rikishi was too big and Austin/Angle both had far too bad necks to take the risk. Rikishi is just so freaking worthless that it’s amazing. Angle comes out third which is kind of weird.

If I remember right Chyna made fun of his attire here as he complained about his package looking too small. Rikishi is mad at Angle for beating him up on Smackdown due to that alliance being broken. I think this is the debut of Rollin as Taker’s theme song. Rock walks straight in as Angle is staying outside for awhile. There are like 6 referees in there keeping people from fighting each other before the match starts. Austin gets a HUGE pop since we’re in the deep south. He throws Angle in and we’re on.

The match has to end in the cage. I’ll do what I can to keep track of what’s going on here but don’t count on much. Angle vs. Taker, Samoan violence and Austin vs. HHH if you’re curious. Lawler evaluates the talent in there at a billion dollars. And people wonder why the USWA went out of business. Leaping knee takes Austin down. We’re just standing around at the moment as we wait on the big thing to happen, likely involving vince. Rock beats on Angle in the ring while the other four fight on the floor.

And now there’s no one in the ring. Ok then. Ah make that Angle/Rock again. This really would have been perfect for the Chamber if it had existed at the time. They overhype everything here as it’s decent but really just a lot of punching so far. HHH gets rubbed into the cage by Austin. Lawler: Don’t rip his nose off! This really isn’t that interesting at all. A bloody HHH hits the Pedigree on Rikishi and Rock saves. I think that’s the first cover of the match.

Finishers a go-go in the ring and everyone saves. After some more basic stuff, Vince and the Stooges come down with a freaking hay truck and says he’s going to tear the cage down. There goes the door and you know what’s coming now. Foley comes down and runs the three guys off, saying the match is going to happen. HHH is outside and Austin follows him.

They fight up by the cars and everyone else comes up there too. Austin hits him with a boom camera and winds up going through a window to bust him open. Pedigree on Rock onto a car. Isn’t the point of a Cell match for the to stay in the Cell? Rock is bleeding….kind of. Ah that’s more like it. Ross oversells everything here, making it sound like it’s the best match ever or something like that. HHH takes a slingshot into a car in a cool looking spot.

Taker and Angle go back to the ring area and it’s all Taker. A chair shot busts him open as HHH and Austin climb the cage. They fight on top and HHH teases the big drop. Angle comes up too to get away from Taker. Stunner on the roof and Taker is up there now too. Rock and Rikishi are the only two not up there at this point. Angle is bleeding now and HHH climbs down to HUGE booing. Austin follows which makes sense.

And here come the Samoans. Taker gets a chair on top somehow and hits a SICK shot to Angle’s head. The fat man hits Taker though and stands tall. It’s just hard take him seriously in that thong though. Rock is on the floor as I don’t think he was ever up top. Angle gets down and it’s the two big men left. They slug it out near the edge over the truck and in the words of Mark Madden: FLY FATBOY FLY! Austin stops dead to see what the thud was, as does Rock. Austin’s face is the most interesting part here actually.

The roof goes off as Austin and Rock slug it out. You knew that was Mania right there. What we didn’t know was that it would top off the best PPV of all time. Rock actually wins the fight and sets for the elbow. Cue HHH for the save as I wonder how we never got the triple threat with these three guys. Rock Bottom to Angle but Austin saves. Stunner to Rock and we get a back flip, but HHH takes out Austin with a neckbreaker, allowing Kurt to put his hand on Rock to retain and shock everyone kind of, ending the show.

Rating: B. This was good but a far cry from the other Cell matches. Like I said, this was perfect for the Chamber but this was still a big match. The first half or so is really weak until we get to all the finishers, but even then we were waiting on it to turn into the big war. Vince and the truck did that and once that happened it really took off and was the match I think they were shooing for. It’s good but it’s not a classic. Meltzer allegedly said it was a match of the year candidate. Must have been a very weak class that year if that’s the case.

We haven’t been to TNA yet. From Genesis 2006 in Angle’s first important match.

Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

Joe has been undefeated for eighteen months in TNA. Angle has a big bandage on his head after a match with Abyss. Kurt grabs a single leg to start but Joe is immediately in the ropes. Some kicks to the ribs set up Angle’s overhead belly to belly and a clothesline puts Joe on the floor. That’s fine with the Samoan as he grabs Angle by the legs and pulls him to the floor, swinging him into the barricade. Quite the counter.

Back in and Angle misses a charge into the post and falls back out to the floor. The suicide elbow drops Kurt again and Joe rams him face first into the steps for good measure. They’re actually nailing the big match feel so far. Kurt’s head is busted open as the bandage has come off. Joe of course kicks at the cut and digs away with his fingers. That’s quite the savage as he rubs Angle’s blood over his chest.

A powerslam puts Angle down for two and a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets the same as Joe is in full control. He tries the MuscleBuster too early though and Angle counters with a tornado DDT for two. Joe misses a charge into the corner though and it’s time to roll some Germans. They both the release though and Joe is dropped (thankfully not on his head) for two.

The Angle Slam is countered into an armdrag and Joe nails a running knee in the corner. An enziguri sets up the MuscleBuster for a close two and both guys are down. Angle rolls out of the Koquina Clutch and grabs the Slam for two. The fans want someone to make the other tap and Angle takes down the straps.

Kurt hooks the ankle lock but Joe finally rolls over and pulls Kurt down into the Clutch. Angle counters that into the ankle lock and Joe is in trouble. He rolls through to send Angle into the corner but misses a charge, setting up the Slam. Angle does a favorite of mine by putting the straps back up so he can take them down agani, setting up the ankle lock with a grapevine to make Joe tap out.

Rating: B-. It’s good but this didn’t hit the levels they were shooting for. The fact that it was only thirteen and a half minutes hurt it a bit as they needed some extra time to make this a big better. It’s good, but having this match so soon in Angle’s run but it wasn’t the worst decision in the world.

We need more Benoit! From Backlash 2001.

Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

30 minute time limit, most submissions win. Angle says Chicago is full of fat sweaty pigs and needs winners. He makes fun of the city which is kind of funny. There’s a thirty second rest period between falls. After some feeling out stuff to start, Angle takes it to the mat and Benoit is all cool with that. Ankle lock doesn’t work so Kurt hits the floor to think for a bit.

This is going to be a long one as the clock is on the screen the entire time. Back in the ring and Angle takes Benoit down which gets him nowhere. Back to the mat again and this time to the floor. Benoit gets the Crossface out there and Angle taps but they’re outside so it doesn’t count. Five minutes in and no falls yet. Angle tries to bring in a chair as we stall a bit. With half an hour I can understand that though.

Back in and Angle is holding his shoulder a lot. And never mind as he was faking since he charges straight in and grabs the ankle lock for the quick tap. You could argue Benoit tapped early to prevent further damage but it still looks kind of weak by Benoit. Angle works on the ankle/knee but charges into a Crossface attempt. That doesn’t work so Benoit shifts to a cross armbreaker to tie us up.

Benoit rams Angle’s shoulder into the post and there’s the armbreaker again but Kurt leans forward to avoid a lot of the pressure before making the rope. Shoulder breaker by Benoit and he goes after Kurt, only to take out the referee at the ten minute mark. Angle gets a chair shot to the head and the ankle lock makes it 2-1. Angle jumps him during the rest period and you can’t really DQ him I guess.

Angle puts on a Crossface seconds later to make it 3-1. Maybe 10 seconds between the end of the rest period and the tap. Kurt hammers him some more and rams his face into the announce table. Benoit backdrops Angle to the floor but doesn’t take the time to breathe. Kurt’s shoulder goes into the post but Benoit’s everything goes into the steps. Ankle lock goes on but it’s still on the floor, meaning Benoit tapping doesn’t mean anything.

We go back in with fifteen minutes left and a 3-1 lead for Kurt. Benoit avoids a cross armbreaker by Kurt which wastes some time. Off to an abdominal stretch which Benoit counters into another cross armbreaker attempt but he can’t get the tap. Out of almost nowhere Benoit gets a Sharpshooter, only for Kurt to make the ropes again. A German is countered into a half Liontamer by Benoit (he used it before Jericho in WCW) for the tap to make it 3-2.

Kurt heads to the floor and it’s time to play defense. Benoit catches him pretty easily and sends him into the steps. Kurt tries to run again and the fans aren’t thrilled at all. With ten minutes to go Angle catches Benoit coming in and they slug it out a bit. Benoit can’t get back in for a bit and Kurt stomps him when he does. Angle hits a snap suplex back inside and keeps trying for the ankle lock.

Out to the floor again and they chop it out. Back in and Benoit gets a dragon screw but can’t hook the ankle. Benoit misses a dropkick and Angle locks in some freaky looking hold before going to a chinlock. Five minutes left as Benoit gets his arm up before a third drop. With four minutes left Benoit breaks the hold with a jawbreaker. And never mind as Kurt takes his head off with a clothesline.

Belly to belly by Kurt which is scary considering how long they’ve been out there. Another hits with three minutes left. Benoit manages to grab some Germans but gets reversed into an ankle lock which he reverses into an ankle lock of his own to tie it up at 3 with just over two minutes to go. The clock keeps running during the thirty second rest. Chop block by Benoit with 1:20 to go. Minute left and it’s German time again. Low blow by Kurt breaks that up but the ankle lock is broken quickly. Ankle lock goes on fill with 8 seconds left and we’re done. Benoit taps after the bell ends in a draw.

Just like in 96 though with Shawn and Bret, it’s time for some overtime, first submission wins it. If it continued though, why wouldn’t the tap just after the bell have ended it? Angle hammers him and the fans aren’t thrilled with him. They go to the mat and Angle grabs an abdominal stretch down there. There’s a Crossface out of nowhere and Angle taps for the ending. Like Benoit was losing in sudden death.

Rating: B. It was entertaining, but the main idea of Benoit vs. Angle is all about having them go back and forth with insane counters until one of them finally gets caught in something. That was taken away here and it brings the match down a lot. To be fair it’s still good but by comparison it’s definitely not as good.

Time for a war. From King of the Ring 2001.

Shane McMahon vs. Kurt Angle

It should be noted that this is one of my favorite matches ever so I’ll be biased in it. Wait, they’re my reviews so I’m biased towards myself, so it’s fine. Angle throws his medals down on the way to the ring so you know this is serious. Again, JR says that after I typed it so I win again. Angle is just beating the heck out of Shane to start here. And just as I say that Shane starts throwing lefts and fights back.

With Shane on the floor, Angle gets on all fours and wants to go amateur, which is more popular that pro in certain areas other than wrestling. Naturally Angle easily gets out and beats on Shane even more. In a nice looking move, Angle hits a gutwrench but it’s overhead instead of to the side. It looked cool. Angle is just throwing Shane everywhere. It looks like a squash but don’t worry. It’ll get better. Shane has had three punches and an armdrag.

He offers Shane another amateur attempt but this time Shane just punts him in the ribs. That’s followed by a jumping back elbow making him awesome. On the floor now, Shane gets on the railing behind JR and Heyman and jumps over both them and the table to hit Kurt with a clothesline in a sweet spot. The guy was athletic and no one can ever argue that.

It’s certainly more entertaining than seeing Vince out there making a fool out of himself. And we have a kendo stick which Shane can swing really well. He actually breaks it over Angle’s back which has to hurt bad. Shane uses armdrags on the floor to send Angle into the railing which is a nice spot. Shane goes for a cover and Angle bridges out of it. Think of the Matrix move.

Shane does the smart thing and just hits him in the stomach. Angle does this three times, showing off his stupidity. It’s weapons time now and Shane is dominating. Ankle lock by Shane and Kurt just kicks him in the face. Nothing wrong with that. We get a Sharpshooter attempt and Shane botches it but gets it eventually. It looks bad but it’s ok I guess. Granted almost no one gets it right so it’s fine.

Shane is just beating the tar out of Angle here. He puts a trash can on his stomach and goes to the top for a shooting star press which misses but looked solid. The fans get a holy censored chant going as they’re impressed here. We hit the floor again and Shane hits a suplex, which breaks Kurt’s tailbone. He’s legit hurt which makes the rest of the match even more impressive. His solution to Shane fighting back: slam Shane’s head into a wall. I like the simple ideas.

In the sickest bump you’ll see in years, Angle suplexes Shane over his head into one of the glass walls with KOR (what, no love for the?) on them. The problem is that it doesn’t break and Shane lands on his head which goes THUD. It sounded and looked SICK. Shane is more or less out of it.

Angle, ticked off that it didn’t work, picks him up and does it AGAIN, this time having it work, drawing another holy censored chant. Angle’s arm is bleeding. We’re under the stage now and Angle suplexes him again and AGAIN it doesn’t break. Shane is busted. Angle goes for another suplex and it doesn’t break. In essence, Shane is being thrown into a wall. Kurt is livid and just picks him up and launches him through a glass wall.

Shane looks like he’s been beaten by an army and raped by a bear while being run over by a train. Angle is spent too. Everyone is just bleeding like something that bleeds a lot. Angle gets an anvil case and puts Shane on it to wheel him back to the ring. That’s a good idea as he’s just dead weight at this point. We’re back in the ring and Angle covers Shane. For two. The place pops like a freaking teenage girl for that. We get a replay where we can see Kurt’s face and he looks like he wants to cry.

A low blow connects and Shane isn’t dead yet. He gets a trash can lid and just pops the tar out of Angle and hits an Olympic Slam for two. Both guys are just freaking spent. Shane gets catapulted into the corner where he just kind of collapses. Angle gets a board from somewhere and just beats Shane about the back and shoulder with it. There’s something awesome about that.

He sets it up on the copes and climbs to the top where he this the Olympic Slam from the top rope. I would say Shane lands in the middle of the ring with a thud, but as they said in Con Air, “the word ain’t land. It’s crash.” They show a bunch a replays and the slam looks cooler and cooler ever time. I mean Shane just explodes on the mat and it looks amazing. Shane’s best match ever by about 1000 miles. They carry him out and he’s just gone. The Slam off the top got the pin if that wasn’t clear.

Rating: A. This was just freaking brutal. It’s a great street fight where you never really believed Shane was completely out of it. That’s a great thing to be able to say, but Shane took the best beating I can recall anyone taking in a long time. Find a copy of this match as it’s right up there with any beating I’ve ever seen.

Back to TNA for a showdown at Lockdown 2010.

Kurt Angle vs. Ken Anderson

This is standard rules but Anderson has the key. Not sure I get the point to that aspect as it’s bound be thrown around sometime. Also, I’d prefer a regular cage match but this is fine I suppose. Anderson has the key around his neck. Ok he has a chain around his neck with the key around it but you get the idea. Anderson goes for the door like 30 seconds in and like an idiot, he forgets about Angle.

Anderson accidentally leaves the key in the lock so there goes the point of the ladder match entirely. Angle is bleeding BAD already. Tenay says it was bound to happen at some point. At some point? I think every match has had that so far. This is one of the feuds that I’ve really liked for the majority of it. Angle is WORKING in there man. He’s still one of the best in the world when he works at it.

There is blood everywhere. Ok not really but it sounds good. Angle hits his run up the ropes and hit a belly to belly. Love that. Anderson uses his wrist tape to choke Angle out which is rather brilliant. Solid match so far. Angle gets his Germans. He hits about 6 or 7 of them and Anderson is just about out of it.

Angle goes for the door but stops. Dang it Kurt don’t be stupid. Ankle Lock is on but you can’t win by tap out. And there’s the Mic Check. Yeah I’m stunned too. Anderson gets the lock open but Angle gets the Slam. And Angle locks the cage again. Ok then. And he throws the key away. Anderson freaks, even though there’s no roof on the cage.

Anderson tries to get out but Angle gets a German OFF THE TOP ROPE! SICK spot. Angle sets him for the moonsault but goes TO THE TOP OF THE CAGE! And he hits it. Yeah Angle still has it. Angle gets a key from….somewhere, but Anderson flips the double bird and is able to get a Mic Check.

We’re getting close to overkill here. Angle catches him with the ankle lock though and Anderson taps again. I smell a broken ankle. Anderson reverses but STILL can’t get out. Angel finds a chain or the Warrior Medal and chokes Anderson out with it in a reference to Anderson choking him out in the ladder match on Impact before walking out. GREAT match.

Rating: A+. Yeah I said it. Great match all around and the ending made sense given the way Anderson won the ladder match. This has been a great show and it needed a great match to get it over the hump. It just got that. Angle is still one of the best in the world and he can bring it.

We’ll jump to TV now for an Iron Man match on Smackdown, September 18, 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Kurt Angle

Angle is champion coming in. This is an iron man match with a sixty minute time limit. There’s a 15 second rest period after each fall. The challenger is the heel. Lesnar jumps him to start and we have a big old clock in the corner. Brock beats him down to start but Angle fires back with some clotheslines. Angle gets a shot to the knee and Brock chills on the floor.

He stays out there until about 8 and the knee isn’t right. Brock asks for time but he was just channeling his inner Bret Hart as he plays possum. Angle doesn’t mind and hits a set of armdrags to send Brock out to the floor. Lesnar grabs the steps but tosses them back instead of using them. He slides in at 9 and goes right back out to break the count. Well it’s not like they don’t have a lot of time to kill.

Brock breaks the count again and make it three times. Four times now. Angle is getting ticked which might be Lesnar’s plan. We’re five minutes into the clock now and we haven’t really gotten anything going but they have plenty of time. Angle goes for the knee and Brock hits the floor AGAIN. Angle charges at him and Brock nails him to finally take over. Angle snaps off a suplex and clotheslines Brock to the floor where he holds the knee again.

Lesnar is down and holding the knee but this time Angle goes after him. He rams Brock into the steps head first and they slug it out. Brock gets the better of that and rams Kurt into the post back first. He goes to grab a chair and pops Angle in the head with it for a DQ at about nine minutes. Brock lays Angle out with the chair a bunch of times but it’s in the rest period so it doesn’t count.

Brock grabs some water at ringside. Does that mean there’s a conspiracy against him? Angle is barely able to stand so Brock drills him with an F5 to tie it up at 49:38 to go. Brock kicks him in the ribs and asks Angle if he wants to tap. Lesnar puts the ankle lock on Kurt and he taps to make it 2-1 at 47:21. We take a break and come back at 44 minutes left with Lesnar breaking an Angle rally with a knee to the ribs.

During the break Brock hit an Angle Slam for two. Brock charges but his shoulder goes into the post. Angle gets a forearm smash and it’s German time. Angle comes at Brock but gets sent back outside. Brock whips him into the railing HARD and this an F5 on the floor for the countout to go up 3-1 at 20 minutes in.

We take a break and come back with Angle in control after hitting some suplexes during the break. Lesnar knocks Kurt to the floor with an elbow and takes over soon thereafter. We’re at 35 minutes left now as Brock gets two off an elbow drop. Angle reverses an Irish whip into the Angle Slam and it’s 3-2 at 34 minutes to go. We’re told that if this goes to a tie we’ll have overtime.

Kurt pounds away but the Angle Slam is countered into an F5 attempt which is countered into the ankle lock. Brock rolls through and Angle manages to avoid the referee. Brock however drills him in the head with a clothesline so when Angle hits the Angle Slam, there’s no referee. Brock hits Angle low and grabs the title. A shot to the head of Angle puts him down and the referee wakes up to make it 4-2 Brock at 29:30 to go.

We take a break and come back with Angle on the floor with 25 minutes to go. Angle pulls him to the floor and hammers away, sending Brock into the steps. With Brock on the outside, Angle goes back in and up top to hit a double axe to Brock’s back. That only gets two back inside though. Kurt goes up again and hits the missile dropkick for a close two. The moonsault that hits once a decade doesn’t hit here and both guys are down.

Angle grabs a rollup for two so Brock takes his head off with a clothesline. Brock gets all ticked off and throws Angle over his head without leaving his own feet. Well that was awesome. It only gets two though and both guys are down. Kurt reverses another belly to belly into the ankle lock but Brock rolls through to send Angle to the floor. Angle goes into the steps again and back to the ring we go.

That only gets two in the ring as we have 20 minutes left with with score 4-2 Brock. Lesnar unhinges some steps but Angle hits a baseball slide to send them into Brock’s face. Kurt looks like his shoulder is hurt from going into the steps. Angle gets an elbow for two as we take a break. Back and it’s 5-2 as Brock hit a superplex for a fall during the break.

We have 14 minuets to go and it’s 5-2 Brock. Brock takes him outside and tries to F5 Angle into the post but Angle reverses to give Brock an F5 into the post with the bad knee hitting the steel. Back inside and Angle throws on a half crab which is very smart. Brock makes the ropes so Angle throws on the ankle lock. Lesnar STILL doesn’t tap so Kurt stomps away at the leg/ankle.

Kurt charges in at Brock but gets caught in an F5. Brock can’t counter though and can only get a delayed two. Lesnar goes up top but Angle pops up for the running belly to belly and it’s 5-3 with 9:50 to go. Angle wins a slugout and pounds Brock down in the corner. Angle puts the straps back up which is a new one for him. He tries to load up the Angle Slam but Brock grabs a DDT for two.

Kurt misses a right hand and Lesnar hits a German. Make that two Germans. Would you believe three Germans? He tries a fourth (there has been a lot of laying around between them so about 90 seconds passed for all those Germans) but Angle counters into two Germans of his own. Angle rolls through something into the ankle lock and in more or less the same ending at Summerslam, Brock can’t find a rope and taps with 4:11 to go.

Four minutes left and both guys are down. Brock still leads 5-4. They’re still down with 3:30 left. Kurt grabs the hold again but Brock rolls through to escape. They’re both down again but Kurt is up and stomping away with three minutes left. Bow and arrow hold, which is like a side version of the STF, goes on to eat up some time. Brock wisely heads to the floor with two minutes left.

Smart strategy there as Lesnar only has to play defense and run the clock out to win the title. Kurt puts the ankle lock on Brock outside but back inside we go. Brock runs again so Kurt rams him into the steps. Angle hits some rolling Germans back in the ring and we hit a minute to go. He hits four Germans but this is taking way too long. Brock kicks him low with 30 seconds left but it’s not seen. Ankle lock with the grapevine is on with 15 seconds left but Lesnar hangs on to win the title and end the show.

Rating: B. This match runs into the exact same problem that is more or less unavoidable for these matches: you can more or less skip the first 55 minutes and you still see the exciting parts. An hour is too long, even when the guys are having an entertaining match. This was good, but like I said the vast majority of it is just waiting for Angle to make his big comeback. However it does fly by as taking out commercials it runs about 46-48 minutes. Good match, but not a good idea for TV.

Time for some Shawn Michaels, from Wrestlemania XXI.

Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle

This was when Angle was the wrestling machine so this should be awesome. Kurt takes in the YOU SUCK chants because that’s how awesome he is. I should mention the set as it has the Hollywood sign on one side and a movie marquee on the other side which says Now Playing and then the match, making it feel all the more special. They stare it down to start until Shawn slaps him in the face.

Angle takes it to the mat and rides Shawn to frustrate him. Shawn gets to a rope and gives Kurt a look like “o………..k then time for a new plan.” Michaels grabs a headlock takeover to slow things down but the fans are behind Kurt. Kurt fights up but can’t escape the hold without using the ropes. Nice storytelling there with Shawn gladly going to the ropes but Angle going to them out of frustration.

Off to a short arm scissors by Shawn for a bit but Angle uses raw power to lift Shawn up into the air. However, since Shawn had that move used on him back in 1992 by British Bulldog, he knows how to roll through into a sunset flip for two. See, THAT is how you play to older fans with some awesome psychology. Back to the headlock as Angle is getting frustrated by Michaels dominating the mat.

Angle takes it into the corner to brawl with Shawn but Shawn ties him up instead. This is also a callback to Wrestlemania XII where Shawn used the exact same strategy on Bret. Angle grabs a quick ankle lock but Shawn rolls through and a Cactus Clothesline puts them both on the floor. Angle loads up the announce table but opts to pick up Shawn in the Angle Slam and ram Shawn back first into the post to take over again.

Back in and Angle gets two off a suplex before putting on a body vice with a chinlock. The fans are split here but Shawn fights up with some chops to take over. Kurt will have none of that though and suplexes Shawn down to stop the comeback bid. Another belly to belly gets two and it’s off to a chinlock with a knee in Shawn’s back. Michaels gets up again and they slug it out with Angle taking Shawn down with a hard clothesline.

Shawn blocks a superplex attempt but Kurt rolls away from the top rope elbow. There go Angle’s straps but Shawn counters the Angle Slam and backdrops Kurt to the floor. Shawn goes up and half dives/half falls onto Angle with a cross body. As they get back in, Angle tries his German suplex off the apron but Shawn kicks him low like a good former villain. With Angle on the announce table, Shawn hits a gorgeous springboard spinning cross body to send Angle onto the floor as the table doesn’t break.

Both guys make it in on different sides of the ring at nine. Angle is bleeding from the mouth. They slug it out again with Shawn taking over. There’s the forearm and nip-up as Shawn’s back is perfectly fine all of a sudden. Now the big elbow hits but the superkick is countered into the ankle lock but Shawn FINALLY makes the rope. The Angle Slam is rolled through but Angle counters into the ankle lock but Shawn counters into a rollup for two. Another superkick is caught and there’s the Angle Slam for two.

To show how angry Kurt is, he puts his straps up just so he can take them down all over again. In a scary spot, Angle tries the moonsault but Shawn doesn’t roll away far enough, sending Angle’s face into Shawn’s side. Shawn goes up again but Angle runs up the corner for the belly to belly off the top. Somehow that only gets two and Angle yells at Shawn, talking about how Michaels’ days are done. Shawn shoves him back and superkicks Angle down but he can’t follow up.

The cover eventually gets two and Shawn isn’t sure what to do now. He slowly stands up but Angle grabs the ankle lock again. Shawn tries to kick Angle off but Kurt won’t let go. They’re in the middle of the ring with Shawn writhing in pain. Angle puts on the grapevine and Shawn is all but dead. He hangs on for as long as he can before FINALLY tapping out to give Angle the win.

Rating: A+. Angle and Shawn at Wrestlemania having a masterpiece. Who would have ever seen that coming? The match was excellent all around and the match never stopped being great. They would have another masterpiece at Summerslam which again shouldn’t surprise anyone. Great match here and definitely worth seeing if you haven’t before.

Angle had to win the TNA Title at some point so why not Slammiversary 2007?

TNA World Title: Chris Harris vs. Kurt Angle vs. AJ Styles vs. Samoa Joe vs. Christian Cage

Title is vacant coming in. The rules here are a bit complicated. It’s a reverse ladder match as you have to hang the title above the ring to win. Before you can do that though, you have to become eligible by getting a pinfall or submission on someone else. If you get pinned or submit, you have to go to a penalty box at ringside for two minutes. Officially Angle has never won the title coming in, even though he won last month. Harris is a surprise entrant. After full entrances for everyone and Big Match Intros we’re finally ready to go.

It’s a huge brawl to start with Cage and goofy Styles (horrible time for him) double teaming Harris. AJ tries to lay down so Christian can be eligible but Angle makes the save. Instead it’s the great AJ dropkick to put Harris down as Angle and Joe fight on the floor. Styles tries a rollup on Christian for two and Christian is livid. Joe breaks up AJ’s moonsault attempt and sends him hard into the barricade.

Back in and Joe nails a running boot to Christian’s chest to put him down but Harris throws Joe through the ropes and onto Angle. Harris can’t hit the Catatonic on Christian but settles for a full nelson slam. AJ tries a tornado DDT but gets caught in the Catatonic to make Harris eligible and send Styles to the box. Joe throws a ladder over the top rope to take out Christian and Harris, giving us Angle vs. Joe. Again.

Joe tries the Facewash on Angle but gets caught in Rolling Germans for his efforts. Christian comes back in and gets caught in the ankle lock and the Clutch at the same time. AJ gets out of the box to make the save as Harris comes back in as well for a big brawl. Christian tries to suplex Harris onto the ladder but gets crotched instead, followed by AJ’s moonsault into a reverse DDT on Harris for two. Styles cleans house but the Clash to Angle is countered into the ankle lock. AJ nips up into a hurricanrana before sending Harris throws AJ over the top onto Chrisitian on the ladder in a big crash.

Harris tries to climb up and hang the belt but Angle brings him down with the Slam for the pin to be eligible. Joe catches Christian in the release Rock Bottom out of the corner and an Island Driver (modified White Noise) takes AJ down. The MuscleBuster gets two as Angle makes the save and there goes the referee. Angle taps out to the Clutch and thankfully Joe doesn’t break the hold. Christian breaks it up with the ladder and steals the pin. Harris is out of the box, Angle goes in and Christian is now eligible.

Joe and Christian go up the ladder with the Samoan taking him down with a huge Diamond Cutter onto the title. Harris goes up the ladder instead but he has to knock Joe down with a belt shot. The same thing happens to Christian but AJ springboard dropkicks the ladder over for the save. Angle is out of the box. Joe and AJ climb on top of the box (just above the top rope) with AJ low blowing out of the Clutch. Joe flips AJ over and through a table on the floor for a HUGE crash.

Now it’s Harris vs. Christian on the cage with Harris getting the better of it. He dives off the cage to take Angle down with a clothesline but has to beat people up before climbing the ladder. Ladder shots put Christian and Kurt down but Christian is up for the save. Christian goes up top but Angle puts on the ankle lock on the ladder. That doesn’t last long as they fight up top until Harris spears Christian down. Angle is all alone and hangs the belt for the win and the title.

Rating: B. It’s a total mess but it’s TNA’s total mess. I can’t imagine people would complain about Angle winning the title as he’s the biggest star in the company and had to really win the title eventually. The fact that Joe wasn’t even eligible for the title is kind of a downgrade for him but he’d have his day eventually.

One more World Title, from Hardcore Justice 2011.

TNA World Title: Sting vs. Kurt Angle

Big match intros fill in some time. Sting is in gray which is a weird look on him. Sting grabs the arm to start as this seems like it’s going to be a feeling out process to start. I think they’re going for the big epic match but that’s just not going to happen here. Angle grabs a headlock which gets him nowhere. The dueling chants are already going and Sting’s paint is like 1/3 off less than two minutes in.

Now Angle works on the arm. The gray isn’t working for Sting as it looks like he’s dusty. Sting escapes and works on the leg to set up for the Scorpion. Angle fights back and hammers away. The champ backdrops him over the top and out to the floor as things slow down a bit. Out to the floor for the usual railing stuff. Back inside and Angle grabs a Samoan Drop for two.

There’s a seated reverse chinlock as Angle works on the back a lot. Off to a slightly modified version of the same chinlock after a few quick covers. Sting pops out of the corner with a clothesline and both guys are down. DDT gets two for the champ. Angle pops off the belly to belly for the same. Sting grabs the Death Drop and you would think Tenay was ordering lunch. Actually scratch that as picking the chicken salad would be more emphatic than that.

Rolling Germans by Angle get two. Tenay sounds like he doesn’t care at all about these covers and near falls. Moonsault misses so Sting hits an Angle Slam for two. There’s the Scorpion which isn’t sat down on at all. He finally makes a rope but Sting hits the Splash but the second one misses. Angle Slam hits for two and no reaction from anyone. Kurt charges at Sting in the corner but his shoulder hits the post.

Sting throws on the ankle lock and they speed things up a bit. Angle puts on the Scorpion Deathlock because that’s how Angle matches roll. Here are some more rolling Germans and Kurt grabs the ankle lock. Sting rolls through for two. And there goes the referee due to a misses enziguri by Kurt. Well it IS a TNA main event. Heeee’re Hulk with a chair. He gets the best reaction of the night and sets to pop Sting with the chair. Angle grabs it from him and Hogan leaves. Kurt blasts Sting with the chair and the Angle Slam gives him the world title.

Rating: C+. Good match overall but the crowd did not care for the most part and neither did Tenay. Not a horrible match but they didn’t get going like I think they wanted to. The finishers were never going to finish it and we were just waiting on the ref bump for the screwy ending. Good enough match but Kurt has had better matches in his sleep.

Angle did something that had never been done before. From King of the Ring 2002.

Kurt Angle vs. Hulk Hogan

This show just kind of sucks and I have a freaking hour to go in it. We fight over technical stuff to start. What I mean by that is Angle does and Hogan just does power stuff. Hogan keeps taking control despite not actually doing anything. Hogan goes for the hair piece and gets a shot in the red and yellow balls. I guess there’s one of each.

Ross says Hogan is as American as apple pie. That’s true. He’s overrated, strange looking, he’s stayed too long, he doesn’t do anything, he gets on people’s nerves, he lies, he cheats, he steals, he cheats on his wife and he tries to be too young. He’s a REAL AMERICAN! Hogan, apparently tired after the work from throwing punches and putting his hand to his ear, is put into a chinlock. Hogan HULKS UP and hits the big boot but instead of the legdrop he pulls the wig off.

After Angle runs, Hogan goes for the legdrop but Angle catches it into the ankle lock. Hogan actually taps and the fans are stunned. That helps the match about a full letter. Ross tries to save Hogan by saying that he held on as long as humanly possible, which is apparently about 15 seconds. Ross can’t remember Hogan ever tapping. That’s just amusing.

Rating: C-. Angle carried this thing completely. Hogan is just a waste here, but to his credit, he tapped. Had he not, this would have ended any chance this show has. Him tapping was right though and it made Angle look much stronger. I mean, can you imagine Hogan tapping out in 1987? Probably not because tapping out wasn’t a thing yet but you get the idea.

You know what sounds awesome? The Olympic Hero vs. the MMA Cowboy of Death. From No Way Out 2006.

Smackdown World Title: Kurt Angle vs. The Undertaker

It’s the remix for Angle’s music here which I never liked. That title just looks AWESOME on him. He was a guy that was incredibly valuable to have on the roster for instances such as this. Batista was hurt and so they needed a credible champion. Angle is someone they could throw the title on and have it be completely realistic. That’s always a great thing and it worked perfectly here.

Taker literally takes four minutes for his entrance. Think he’s taking long enough? Cole’s voice sounds like it’s giving out. Angle tries to get a hold on him early on and Taker goes to the ropes. That’s a bit odd to see I’d think. Angle hits the floor when nothing works. Cole says neither of them have ever tapped. What the heck has he been watching for the seven years Angle has been in the company? He’s lost an Ultimate Submission match and Jericho made him tap on Raw once. Also Benoit made him tap multiple times. Yeah that’s nonsense.

Taker works a headlock which is odd to see him using. Off to the arm and a short arm scissors which gets him nowhere. They’re going back and forth here and it’s working for the most part. Definitely a slow build as we have nearly half an hour to go and no more matches. Old School connects and Taker busts out a Downward Spiral of all things for two.

Snake Eyes hit but Angle hits a SWEET release German for one. The dueling chants begin which makes sense as these are both faces. There’s some chick at ringside that screams louder than Melina. Taker gets knocked off the apron and into the railing. Angle dives at him and is caught before being rammed into the post. The apron legdrop is VINTAGE! Back in and Angle blocks a chokeslam with some kicks so Taker just hits him in the face to put him back down.

Angle goes for the knee and gets the post figure four. Solid stuff here so I apologize for the lack of humor. There’s nothing to make fun of. Patrick gives this big lecture to Angle about keeping it in the ring and Angle nods at it. Patrick turns around and Angle is right back out there which was rather funny. They’re building very slowly here but Angle is picking it up a bit.

Back to the floor again with Taker drilling him with knees. Taker’s knee is messed up a bit and this time he’s selling so we’ve got that going for once. It’s noticeable how much more swearing there is here. Angle grabs the legdrop on the apron this time and gets the ankle lock. Angle holds him on the floor against the ten count, breaking at seven and then breaking the count before going right back to the ankle. That’s sweet stuff there.

We hit the ring again and Taker is caught in another leg lock for a bit. More dueling chants start up. Taker counters mounted punching with a triangle choke and Angle is in trouble. Amazing that Fedor can’t last 10 seconds in one but Angle can last like 30 in it. We hit the floor again and Angle is in trouble. They’ve broken the count like 10 times so far which isn’t something you see that often. It adds some realism to the match as they’re not ignoring rules for the sake of convenience.

Taker clears off the announce table and then rolls in to break the count again, even though I’m not sure one was going on. Angle grabs Taker and puts him through the other announce table with the Angle Slam out of nowhere. Angle stops the count at 9 including some F Bombs. Back to the floor again with Angle pounding away. Taker wouldn’t have beat the count back in. He reverses Angle and sends him into the steps. GREAT match if you can’t tell that.

Taker goes up but gets caught and takes some punches. Angle sets for a suplex but Taker knocks him back. Angle is all like boy I said I’m suplexing you so I’m suplexing you and runs up the corner to throw Taker down in a belly to belly. Somehow that only gets two. Fans are way into this. Angle throws more punches so Taker kicks him in the face. Sometimes you can’t beat the simple stuff.

Chokeslam is countered into the ankle lock and Taker is reeling. Taker can’t shove him off so he pulls him in, grabs the head and locks on the triangle choke again. Angle reverses that and hooks the ankle lock one more time. Taker rolls through and finally gets out of it. Chokeslam mostly hits but Taker kind of dropped him which might have been intentional due to the ankle. That gets two as I’m loving this stuff.

Last Ride is reversed into a sunset flip and Angle grabs the ankle lock AGAIN for like what, the fifth time? Yeah two in the previous sequence and two on the floor. Dang man. Taker can’t get the ropes so he kicks Angle off AGAIN. Angle Slam connects for TWO. Sweet merciful crap this is awesome. Angle pulls down the straps as Taker sits up in a great visual.

They slug it out and Taker sends him in and grabs the Tombstone. Angle reverses and Taker reverses and ANGLE reverses into the SIXTH Ankle lock, this time with the grapevine attached. Taker raises his hand to tap and he’s in the middle of the ring. Taker rolls them over and kicks Angle in the face again to become the ONLY person I’ve ever seen to survive the grapevine ankle lock.

Angle slips up behind Taker as he gets up and hits ANOTHER Angle Slam (NINE freaking finishers from Angle if you’re keeping track) and Angle rolls him up but Taker busts out (and perhaps debuts) the Hell’s Gate (not called that yet and still called a triangle choke here. Thank you martial arts master Tazz) and Angle is in big trouble. Angle is almost out and after the second arm drop he pops up and jumps over into a cradle while the choke is still on and gets the three! Taker thinks he’s won and Angle is DONE. Post match Taker says he has Angle’s number. I guess he’ll text the rematch request.

Rating: A+. Screw Meltzer and his love of Japanese guys and his cruiserweight nonsense. THIS is your match of the year. These two beat the tar out of each other and it was nothing but awesome the whole way. For some reason (Angle leaving for TNA) they never had the big rematch. THIS should have been the main event of Mania rather than a 9 minute triple threat with Angle dropping the belt to that pest Rey so that Eddie could have his second moment at Mania.

Both guys looked awesome out there and they threw everything they had at each other and then the ending worked perfectly. Both guys more or less lost and it lets Taker keep his credibility. Much like the Benoit match at the 03 Rumble, Taker didn’t get beat so much as he got caught. That’s a very key thing and it helps a lot here. Excellent match and well worth going out to see.

Is there anything else we could wrap this up with? I’ve talked about it enough. From Royal Rumble 2003.

Smackdown World Title: Chris Benoit vs. Kurt Angle

Team Angle is immediately ejected to make sure it’s one on one. Benoit grabs a headlock to start before trying the Sharpshooter to send Angle to the floor. Back in and Angle goes for the ankle but gets dropkicked away. Benoit grabs a kind up reverse Figure Four but Angle grabs the rope. This is all holds/counter holds so far. Benoit gets sent shoulder first into the post followed by an Angle suplex for two.

They chop it out with Benoit taking over and hitting a reverse clothesline to take Angle down. Angle drops Benoit across the top rope but gets guillotined down by the Canadian. They head to the apron with Benoit DDTing him down onto the side of the ring. The champion has a busted nose now. Back in and the Swan Dive misses but Benoit rolls out of the Angle Slam. There’s the Sharpshooter to Angle who eventually gets to a rope. A belly to back suplex gets two for Chris but Angle snaps off an overhead belly to belly (just one so far).

Back to the floor where Benoit gets dropped onto the barricade to further mess with his head. Off to a rear naked choke back inside so Kurt can overly loudly call some spots. Angle catches Benoit in another belly to belly followed by a belly to back for two. Back to the chinlock for a bit until a double clothesline puts both guys down. Benoit rolls some Germans but so does Angle. And people wonder why their necks were held together by tape.

Benoit gets the final German but Angle runs the ropes to hit the belly to belly off the top to put both guys down. That gets two but the Angle Slam is countered into the Crossface. Angle gets the rope, so Benoit shifts to an ankle lock. Angle reverses into one of his own and now Benoit is in trouble. Benoit goes to kick off but instead grabs another Crossface. Kurt counters into a rollup but Benoit put the Crossface on the other (right) arm this time. Angle stands up and hits the Angle Slam but can’t immediately cover.

Angle takes the straps down but another German attempt is countered into a rollup for two. They trade HARD Germans until Benoit hooks a release German to put both guys down. Before anyone asks, the difference between this and the previous match with the suplexes is how hard these are. Steiner looked like he was at a dance recital but here they look like they’re trying to kill one another. Not to mention there’s OTHER STUFF in between the suplexes.

Benoit hits the longest diving headbutt you’ll EVER see, but he can’t cover because of his head getting jarred like that. Angle counters the Crossface into a reverse powerbomb onto the buckle. The Angle Slam gets a VERY close two as the crowd is losing their minds. Back to the Crossface but Angle rolls through into the ankle lock. Benoit rolls over but can’t break the hold. He kicks Kurt off but Angle goes right back to the hold. Benoit keeps trying to kick him off but Angle hooks the grapevine and Benoit has to tap.

Rating: A+. That’s your match of the year right there people. Oh wait according to Meltzer there was some match in Japan that no one but him ever saw and that has to be better than this right? Anyway, these two DESTROYED each other with some absolutely amazing counters and awesome sequences out there while suplexing the tar out of each other. This both guy’s best match ever, and that’s saying A LOT.

Angle didn’t have as many masterpieces as some people probably think he did, but the guy is going to give you one of the best matches of the night no matter what show it’s on. There are a lot of great matches I could have put on here but you have to cut it off somewhere. He can go with anyone and at the end of the day you don’t argue with a gold medal. The fact that he can talk with the best of them makes him even greater. If you’ve never seen it, find some of his promos from 2000. They’re pure greatness.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of 1997 WCW Monday Nitro Reviews at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Today we have a giant killer: Spike Dudley.

Spike got his start in 1993 and made it to ECW in late 1996. We’ll pick things up at Cyberslam 1997.

Axl Rotten vs. Spike Dudley

Spike takes some laps around the ring so Rotten sneaks to the floor and drills him to start. Basically Spike’s gimmick was that he was a stoner that would get beaten up for about 99% of the match and occasionally hit an Acid Drop (running Diamond Cutter up the corner) for the shocking pin, usually against a giant. Into the ring for more beatings until Spike hits a few basic moves to get some offense in along with some dives. He blocks a bulldog and gets one of his own as Bubba and D-Von come out. Their distraction lets Axl hit a Dominator to end it. Hey look: it’s another boring match.

Rating: F+. Dude, give me SOMETHING of note. The opener was decent at best and since then it’s been pointless singles matches that aren’t any good. Spike was pretty worthless until he got a cult following (as in a portion of the cult following ECW had) who made him as famous as he got. This wasn’t interesting at all as Spike more or less got squashed here but by a guy I have zero interest in watching.

Off to Born to Be Wired for a match that made Spike’s career.

Spike Dudley vs. Bam Bam Bigelow

This is before the Giant Killer phase for Spike. Spike beats up a chair before the match due to reasons of drugs. We’re eight days from Hardcore Heaven and we’re told that we’ll learn Bigelow’s opponent later in the hour. Bigelow asks the fans what section he should throw Spike into. Spike grabs a leg which gets him nowhere at all. Well scratch that as it gets him launched halfway across the ring and through the air.

Bigelow picks Spike up again and teases the fans about throwing him into the crowd but just drops him down instead. A BIG suplex puts Spike down and Dudley sells like only he can. The guy can’t do much because of his size but he’s great at looking like a rag doll. Spike gets posted and he’s busted open. Bigelow splashes him in the corner but the moonsault misses. Spike fires away with a bunch of forearms which finally drop Bigelow for two. The Acid Drop is blocked as Bigelow launches Spike to the mat. Spike hits Bigelow low and hooks a victory roll for the shocking upset.

Rating: D+. This is Heyman 101: when a guy is a huge underdog, he’ll get slaughtered for almost all of the match and then hit one move out of nowhere for the pin. Watch ECW and see how many times you get that exact ending. Spike would wind up as a kind of a cult favorite (inside the cult that was ECW) and he would be the opponent at Hardcore Heaven, where Bigelow MASSACRED him.

To Hardcore Heaven 1997 for said massacre.

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Spike Dudley

Spike is 5’7 and 155lbs but recently defeated the 6’3, 360lb Bigelow, setting up this showdown. Dudley’s full name is Little Spike Dudley and he wears tye dye and talks about seeing colors. His finishing move is called the Acid Drop if the idea isn’t clear enough. Bigelow is a huge bald man who has been a monster for over ten years now. He’s also Brian Lee’s replacement in the Triple Threat, joining Candido and Douglas.

Spike hammers away to start but is LAUNCHED across the ring with ease. A running splash crushes Spike and Bigelow does a little dance. Dudley comes back with a bulldog out of the corner but his hurricanrana is countered into the biggest powerbomb I’ve seen in years. Bigelow picks him up and slams Spike onto the turnbuckle, busting him open badly. Back in, Bigelow gorilla presses him up and throwing him from the ring into about the third row. He would do that again in the ECW Arena in a clip that was on ECW highlight reels for years. Back in and Bigelow hits an over the shoulder piledriver followed by the moonsault for the pin.

Rating: D. This was literally a squash but entertaining despite its low quality. Spike would regularly beat giants in ECW, only to get crushed like this later on. Bigelow was capable of looking great while destroying people and making the fans hate him, giving us a very good pairing between these two. Nothing match but the bumps looked awesome.

Spike would spend a lot of time fighting his brothers, such as here at Heat Wave 1998.

Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Tommy Dreamer/Sandman

The match is billed as a street fight, which usually applies to most ECW matches. The Dudleys take their sweet time getting to the ring. They now have Jeff Jones in their camp as well. This is Bubba Ray/D-Von/Big Dick if that wasn’t clear. Bubba challenges anyone in the WWF or WCW to a fight before moving on to challenge fans. Joel gets the mic and describes himself as hotter than a heat wave and harder than Chinese algebra.

Jones is announced as a referee with hair and is carrying a doll made to look up like Beaulah. Sign Guy has a knee injury but is introduced as the Innovator of Silence (as opposed to Dreamer being the Innovator of Violence). The Dudleys are the Intergalactic Six Man Champions. The entrances are funny but take nearly fifteen minutes. Their opponents all come out carrying ladders which are set up on the ramp. Sandman’s entrance is shorter at only about four minutes.

There will be tags, at least to start, with D-Von trading slaps with Dreamer. A few pinfalls attempts get two each but the fans get distracted by something in the crowd. Bubba comes in and the fans want Spike, who gets the tag and is promptly thrown all over the place. He’s able to get out of a gorilla press and nails Bubba with some forearms followed by right hands in the corner. Bubba responds with a running layout powerbomb to crush Spike.

A hard lariat drops Spike so Dreamer tries to start a Spike chant. Bubba misses a splash and Spike counters a powerbomb with a hurricanrana. The tag brings in Big Dick and he gets to face Sandman so the brawl can get started. They quickly get to the floor and everything breaks down. All six pair off and they fight into the crowd with Spike hammering away on D-Von and Dreamer sending Big Dick into the barricade.

Bubba crotches Dreamer on the barricade as Sandman brings a ladder into the ring. A bloody Spike climbs the ladder and dives on all three Dudleys. D-Von is thrown back inside and crushed under a swanton from Sandman. Bubba’s middle rope backsplash onto the ladder onto Dreamer has Tommy rolling around in agony. Spike comes back with an Acid Drop for two as the fans don’t seem to care all that much. Everyone but Dreamer is bleeding now.

The Dudleys all get tied into Trees of Woe and Dreamer puts Sign Guy’s bad leg in a Figure Four. Jeff Jones makes the save and piledrives the doll, earning him a piledriver from Dreamer. Gertner gets tied in a Tree of Woe as well and all four get chairs put in front of the face. Referee John Finnegan helps the good guys as they all hit dropkicks to drive the chairs into a Dudley’s face. Big Dick is up and chokebombs Dreamer before throwing Spike over the top and through a table. Sandman takes Big Dick down but Bubba lays him out. Bubba misses a splash to Dreamer and gets DDTed on the ladder for the pin.

Rating: D. This was the usual ECW brawl but the wrestling at the beginning brought it down. The problem with guys like Sandman and Big Dick is that they’re only good at brawling, making it almost painful to watch them try to do a technical sequence. The other issue is no one believes this isn’t going to break down into a brawl, so why waste time on the wrestling stuff, especially when it’s supposed to be a street fight?

And again at Guilty As Charged 1999.

Dudley Boys vs. New Jack/Spike Dudley

Spike is dressed like a gangsta to match New Jack. The weapons are brought in and the fight is quickly on with the Boys in early trouble. Jack bites D-Von and Spike hits Bubba low a few times. D-Von and New Jack head to the floor as Spike hurricanranas Bubba out of the corner for two. Bubba comes back with a LOUD cookie sheet shot to Spike’s face. D-Von unloads on New Jack with right hands as Bubba channels Bam Bam Bigelow by throwing Spike over the top and into the crowd.

Bubba goes back to pick Spike up and throws him over the barricade for another big crash. Jack sends D-Von into the barricade before hitting him in the head with the ring bell. Spike is somehow still alive and ripping at Bubba’s eyes. Jack and Spike get in the ring and both guys get guitars. The Dudleys have chairs but quickly bail. Big Dick goes down after two guitar shots but the Dudleys come back with the chairs to take over. Jack is thrown to the apron and Bubba hits a middle rope sitout powerbomb to break Spike in half.

Instead of covering, Bubba goes after Jack on the ramp and gets hit in the face with a cookie sheet. D-Von takes it away and nails Bubba by mistake, but is still able to hit a mostly botched 3D (Bubba’s arms were around Jack’s chest instead of his head). Back in the ring Spike hits an Acid Drop on Big Dick and one on both Dudleys. He tries a second on Big Dick but gets thrown off, setting up a much better 3D for the pin.

Rating: C-. Again, they kept this short and the match worked far better as a result. It also didn’t turn into the brawl around the arena which really takes away from what they’re doing most of the time. It’s still not good, but keeping these things somewhat under control helps them out a lot.

For the Tag Team Titles at Hardcore Heaven 1999.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Balls Mahoney/???

Mahoney fights them off on his own to start and actually takes Bubba down, only to slip on a top rope elbow attempt and hit Bubba’s leg instead of his chest. D-Von is back in now but walks into a belly to belly suplex. Mahoney gets slammed off the top as Spike Dudley’s music starts, bringing the match to a standstill. They’re waiting at the ramp but Spike comes through the crowd with a double low blow (which clearly didn’t make contact with D-Von).

Balls throws Spike onto Gertner and Sign Guy but the Dudleys jump Mahoney from behind. Balls then throws Spike at the Dudleys but they catch him in mid air and throw him out to the floor. D-Von hits a flying headbutt to Balls’ head and they fall outside. Spike limps back into the ring but walks into a big Samoan drop from Bubba. A table is set up and Spike gets kicked in the face. He comes back with a low blow but Bubba counters his hurricanrana with a huge sitout powerbomb through the table.

Balls breaks up the cover but gets caught by a reverse DDT from D-Von. 3D looks to finish Spike but Balls cleans house with the chair. Gertner nails Balls with a chair to no effect. He tries to light a fireball but winds up just throwing the matches in a funny bit. Joel dances in the corner as Balls pulls out a bottle of lighter fluid and sprays it with his mouth. He picks up a match and blows fire at Gertner, only to walk into 3D for the pin.

Rating: D. Where do I even start? First of all, this is the third straight pay per view where the Dudleys have issued an open challenge and Spike has answered with a different partner. Second, we’re twenty minutes into this show and two title matches are already done. This is what I was getting at when I said ECW could go nuts at any given moment. Third, the match wasn’t even any good as it was basically Bubba vs. Spike with D-Von and Balls running interference.

Then again, with Balls Mahoney against the Dudleys for the Tag Team Titles. Some of you may be noticing a pattern emerging here. From Heat Wave 1999.

Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Balls Mahoney

Balls and Spike are challenging and Mahoney makes this a street fight where falls count anywhere in the building. Spike is quickly thrown onto the ramp and D-Von goes after him, leaving Balls to hammer on Bubba in the ring. A HARD chair shots drops Mahoney but Spike avoids a similar shot. Spike grabs a bulldog to send Bubba onto the ramp as D-Von sends Mahoney into the barricade. Spike runs down the ramp but gets backdropped into the ring.

The partners switch off again and D-Von hits Spike in the head with the bell. Mahoney hits Bubba in the head with a beer as a bloody Spike hurricanranas D-Von out to the floor. Bubba nails Spike in the head with a sign that says Dudley Street before carving up Mahoney’s head with a cheese grater. Now Balls is bleeding and Joey sounds like he’s going to be sick. Mahoney comes back with a superkick and nails Bubba in the head with the cheese grater.

Spike and D-Von are brawling in the crowd with both guys now bleeding. The cameras can’t keep up with them but they do see Bubba and Mahoney fighting in the crowd. They head up to a tunnel that leads to the concourse but Spike dives off a balcony to take them both down. Balls pulls D-Von back towards the ring and hits him in the head with a soda.

D-Von stomps away back inside but gets superkicked in the face. Bubba and Spike are back in as well with Bubba going up, only to get hit low. The challengers hammer away in opposite corners until the Dudleys take them down with stereo sitout powerbombs. Bubba and D-Von hammer away while ripping at the cuts on their opponents’ heads.

Balls and Spike duck right hands and nail neckbreakers at the same time for two each. An Acid Drop gets two on D-Von before a low blow and another Acid Drop gets two on Bubba. Sign Guy has to make the save so Balls rips Gertner’s mask off (revealing that he looks fine). The Dudleys hammer away, but a double rollup is good for the pin to give us new champion.

Rating: D-. This stuff is getting old in a hurry. As mentioned, this is the fourth show in a row where Spike has fought the Dudley Boys and the second in a row where he was teaming with Balls Mahoney. As for the match itself, you could barely follow anything because it was another wild brawl with everyone bleeding and a bunch of weapons. The teams doing the same moves at the same time makes the match look really scripted and hurts whatever good they have going on. Horrible match here which again wouldn’t mean anything as the teams would trade the titles twice more each, with no reign lasting over a month.

Somehow this got Spike a World Title program with Mike Awesome, starting at Guilty As Charged 2000.

ECW World Title: Spike Dudley vs. Mike Awesome

Awesome is defending. Spike puts out tables before Mike comes to the ring, including two in a stack. He jumps Awesome as the champion gets into the ring but Awesome throws him through a table less than twenty seconds in. Back in and Awesome throws Spike through the stack of two tables and Dudley is barely moving. Awesome gets two off a slingshot splash back inside and the champion isn’t happy.

Spike fights out of an Awesome Bomb and sends Mike to the floor, followed by a running shoulder off the apron. An Acid Drop over the barricade has Mike in trouble and Spike nails him with a few chair shots. Back in and Spike catches his foot on a suicide dive attempt, so the fans are of course merciless. Spike still counters an Awesome Splash with a top rope hurricanrana and hits a quick double stomp out of the corner. A spear puts both guys through the ropes but Mike kicks a chair into Spike’s face.

Awesome moves the barricade forward and throws Dudley into the crowd. He nails Spike with a not great looking chair shot but makes up with it off a huge springboard dive into the crowd. Awesome slips on the landing though and is holding his elbow. It doesn’t seem to be bad though as he and Jones set up another table, only to have Spike nail an Acid Drop through the table on the floor.

Spike is busted open but nails Awesome with a top rope chair shot. Back in and Awesome counters another Acid Drop by tossing Spike over the top and through a table. Mike brings in another table, blocks another Acid Drop and hits the same clothesline he used on Spike’s girlfriend. A super Awesome Bomb through the table retains the title.

Rating: D. Stick this about four slots earlier on the card and cut off about ten minutes from the match and it’s way better. There’s no real reason to have this as the main event, especially with some of the other stuff they had on this card. Awesome got to dominate, but there was never any doubt as to who was going to win here.

And a rematch from ECW on TNN on January 28, 2000.

ECW World Title: Mike Awesome vs. Little Spike Dudley

Spike jumps Awesome to start and is immediately slammed down to the floor. Spike fires back but gets whipped into the barricade to keep the champion in control. After a quick brawl in the crowd we head back inside for Awesome to charge into a boot to the face. The champion hits a release German suplex for two and a lifting powerbomb for the same. A table is set up on the floor but Spike manages to bulldog Awesome through it instead.

Spike hits a top rope chair shot to Awesome but the champion is down on the floor. The Acid Drop is countered so Spike hits Awesome in the head with a chair instead. The fourth chair shot to the head in a row gets two but Awesome gets his foot up in the corner to block a charge. A BIG Awesome Bomb puts Spike down but the Awesome Splash gets two. Another table is set up in the corner and a running Awesome Bomb through said table retains the title.

Rating: D+. There was some drama here with the near falls but man alive could you have Spike do ONE SINGLE WRESTLING MOVE? I know he can do them because I’ve seen them use them before, but instead it was nothing but chair shots here. That’s a major reason I don’t like ECW: they thought swinging a chair in a wrestling ring meant wrestling.

Spike would miss most of 2000 with a bad leg but would come back for a TV Title shot at Massacre on 34^th Street.

TV Title: Rhino vs. Spike Dudley

Rhino is defending and Spike is out for revenge for Rhino breaking Spike’s leg. The fight is on fast but Rhino breaks up an Acid Drop thirty seconds in. Spike Gores Rhino and goes after the big man’s leg but they quickly head to the floor. Rhino sends him into the barricade a few times but Spike gets a boot up to stop a charge. The challenger throws a chair in but Rhino pulls him off the apron to send him face first into a table. A chair to the head busts Spike open and they head back inside where the beating continues.

Rhino sends him face first into an open chair but stops to jaw with the fans, allowing Spike to throw a chair at the champion’s face. Another chair shot to Rhino’s head puts both guys on the floor and they head into the crowd. Spike quickly climbs a balcony and hits a dive to take Rhino down. A chair to the back of Rhino’s head has him in big trouble and they head back inside.

Rhino avoids a charge to send Spike face first into a buckle before countering the Acid Drop by sending Spike over the top and out through a table. Back in and Rhino nails the Gore but Spike bails to the floor. He’s quickly up though and nails Rhino in the knee with a chair. Spike tapes the leg to the ropes but Rhino breaks free and chokes Spike out for the win.

Rating: C-. They did what they could here but Spike’s quests for revenge rarely go very well. The size difference is too much to overcome and it would be too much to have Spike actually beat Rhino. He was able to do damage though and that’s about as far as they could go. Not a great match or anything but it could only be so good.

Off to the WWF now, starting on Raw, April 9, 2001.

Dudley Boys vs. X-Factor

Six man tag here. They start brawling in the aisle until we start with Justin vs. Bubba in the ring. Off to Spike as the Dudleys control early. Heel miscommunication puts Albert down but Spike dives on him which of course fails. Paul: “Not over here! We’re not Spanish!” Pac vs. Spike now. Spike gets beaten down a bit more until it’s hot tag to D-Von. This doesn’t last long as the bigger Dudleys put Albert on the floor and a 3D ends Credible. More or less a nothing match.

Spike would get a Tag Team Title shot at King of the Ring 2001.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike and ???

So we needed the interview to bridge the gap of 45 seconds? Well alright then. The Dudleys just won the titles three days before this by beating Benoit and Jericho thanks to Austin hitting Benoit with the title belt. And the mystery partner is Kane of all people. He’s IC Champion here and the pop is great. I’m loving this crowd. No Molly though which is a shame as she was freaking beautiful around this time.

In a cool spot, Kane and Bubba throw Spike back and forth like a ball until Bubba finally goes to the ground. This was one of the few periods when Spike was bearable. He’s still annoying, but not as much as. He’s like X-Pac. When he was against guys that were average size like D-Von he could put on a passable match, but with guys like Bubba who are bigger, there’s just no validating him having a chance at all.

The fans, to the shock of no one, want tables. That’s something that’s simply never going to die. Heyman goes into one of his legendary anti-women rants that never get old. He’ll never top the Medusa one though. Spike is of course getting the tar beaten out of him. At least some things never change. He goes for a rana and gets the living tar powerbombed out of him. He takes that move better than anyone I can ever remember.

D-Von is so far ahead of Bubba that it’s scary. He’s actually a decent worker and has had better characters over the years. He got rid of all the stupid Dudleys in ECW if nothing else. Kane comes in and hits a sweet sounding punch to D-Von. Bubba actually jumps into a sidewalk slam which looks really bad as Kane can’t get him all the way up.

He makes it up with a nice powerslam but they botch the living tar out of it as D-Von misses his cue to make the save so Long has to just stop his count at a long two while Bubba isn’t moving at all. The fans boo the heck out of it as no one is fooled at all. Spike gets thrown over the ropes in a reenactment of the Bigelow throw. With both Dudleys on the floor, Kane gets on the top on the opposite side of the ring.

He’s never been that smart. Acid Drop hits Bubba but this time D-Von gets the timing right. I types this time D-Von at the exact same time that Ross said it. Kane takes What’s Up, which according to past storylines meant nothing. Spike takes a 3D (for no apparent reason called a DDT by Ross. Heyman corrects him and Ross wakes up) for the pin. They set up a table but Kane stops them, hitting a diving powerbomb of all things on D-Von and Bubba goes through it. Well that was kind of pointless.

Rating: D+. Eh this was about as safe of a match as you could have asked for. That botch on the count was the worst I’ve ever seen though and it’s why this isn’t a C or so. I mean it completely made things look fake. No one expected new champions here and that’s fine and I’m glad they didn’t make the stupid switch. The match was ok at best but it filled in ten minutes, so that’s all well and good I suppose.

Spike got a Hardcore Title shot on Raw, December 10, 2001.

Hardcore Title: Spike Dudley vs. Undertaker

Taker won the title last night and Spike sits on his bike on the way to the ring. Pain ensues. Taker puts him in the Tree of Woe but Spike gets in a low blow and some weapon shots but they get shrugged off. A HUGE Last Ride onto a trashcan ends this quick. Taker is still insanely over because he’s still the same character he was before his heel turn.

And another Tag Title shot on Raw, January 7, 2002.

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz

This is hardcore for no apparent reason and Stacy is with the Dudleys. It’s a brawl to start with Spike being sent into the steps. Bubba sprays him with a fire extinguisher as the fans want tables. Spike tries a sunset flip on Bubba, only to get blasted with the extinguisher again. A HARD trashcan lid to the face puts Tazz down and What’s Up Tazz? Bubba wants tables but whispers it because he’s evil right now.

Tazz is almost put through but Spike makes the save with a stop sign. There’s a Tazmission to D-Von but Tazz has to let it go to move a table. Stacy flashes Tazz to distract him but Bubba gets the view instead, allowing for a suplex onto a table. Spike puts him through the table with a Dudley Dog for the upset and the titles.

Rating: D+. The match was fast paced but not all that great. The problem here was that at the end of the day, does anyone buy Spike and Tazz as a long term championship team? It was clear that they were transitional champions, which is ok, but it doesn’t do much overall. The live crowd loved this though and there was a match before this to set it up, so it was far better than some other angles I’ve seen that tried to do the same thing.

Here’s a defense at No Way Out 2002.

Tag Titles: Booker T/Test vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz

The big guys are the challengers here. There are only one set of belts at this point so for some reason they decided that these two are the best choice for the titles. That’s just bizarre but whatever. Their combined weight is 398lbs. That’s just amusing. Test and Tazz fight as do the others. Test and Booker were champions back in the Alliance days I believe. Spike comes in with a missile dropkick off the top to take care of Test.

We get kind of a Hart Attack from the challengers but with a side kick instead. Tazz of course stands there and watches it happen instead of making a save or even attempting a save. Why save your tiny partner I guess? Spike as usual takes a beating which is what he is made for it seems. Axe Kick kills him pretty much and we get a spinarooni.

VERY weak hot tag to Taz who puts Booker on the floor. Test goes for a cover but yells at the referee when it’s two and walks into the Tazmission for the tap out. For the life of me I don’t get the point in putting the titles on these guys and then keeping them with these two for so long. A more traditional team would win them soon afterwards with Billy and Chuck.

Rating: D+. Pretty weak Raw level match here that didn’t have much at all going for it. Again Taz and Spike were nice for awhile but in matches like this it was just stupid. I mean really, beating Booker and Test clean? Would anyone buy that at all? I certainly didn’t and thankfully they would lose the belts soon after this.

Spike and Taz would lose the titles a few days later so we’ll jump ahead to Raw on April 8, 2002.

European Title: Spike Dudley vs. William Regal

Regal is defending, Spike steals the brass knuckles and knocks him out and we have a new champion in 5 seconds.

Time to reform the Dudleys! At Survivor Series 2002.

Dudley Boys/Jeff Hardy vs. 3 Minute Warning/Rico

This is an elimination tables match. Oh and that’s Bubba and Spike, not D-Von. Spike and Bubba got put through the same table on Raw Monday to set this up. The Dudleys and Jeff clear the ring to start and Spike is thrown into the arms of the Samoans. It’s Bubba vs. Rico in the ring at the moment, because putting Spike and Jeff against Umaga and Rosey is a great idea right? Bubba chops Rico HARD in the corner before things settle down.

What’s Up hits Jamal and we get to the tagging section of the match before everything breaks down again. Bubba tells Jeff to get the tables but Rosey runs over Bubba after Bubba sets up a table in the corner. A BIG backdrop puts Jeff on the floor and Rosey rams Spike’s head into a table. Rosey misses a charge and drives himself through a table in the corner but that doesn’t count because it wasn’t someone else putting him through.

Jeff tries a top rope dive at Rosey but literally bounces off. Rico brings in another table and gets caught in a Dudley Dog, but 3 Minute Warning catches him in a double powerbomb to put Spike through the table instead. Jeff and Bubba get slammed down but Bubba knocks Rosey off the top and Jeff sends Rico flying into a cameraman. Bubba pounds away but Rico hits a spinwheel kick to take his head off. Rico could go in the ring make no mistake.

Rosey and Jeff go out into the crowd and there’s a table out there with them. Jeff is put on said table as Bubba gets kicked in the face by Rico. Jamal misses a splash and crushes Rico, allowing Bubba to Bubba Bomb Jamal and go to save Jeff. With Bubba’s help, Jeff goes up to the top of an entrance and hits a BIG Swanton through Rosey through the table to make it 2-2.

Back in the ring Jamal has Bubba on a table ready for a Rico moonsault, but he looks hesitant to launch. He looks over his shoulder, shouts “C’MON JEFF!” before staggering. THEN Jeff shakes the ropes and Rico crotches himself. Not the best response but that’s on Jeff more than Rico. Bubba tries a belly to back superplex through the table but Jamal moves it away. Jeff hits Whisper in the Wind to Jamal and follows it with a dropkick.

Hardy goes to the floor to get another table which he throws at Jamal. Jeff tries to run the railing but Jamal throws the table at Jeff, who goes flying through it. That doesn’t count which I can kind of agree with. Jamal puts Jeff on another table and hits a HUGE splash off the top to eliminate Jeff. That looks awesome. Bubba beats on Rico in the ring but Jamal saves his sideburned buddy. Jamal goes up to try a top rope rana (I guess) on Bubba, only to get caught in a HUGE powerbomb through the table to get us down to one on one.

It’s Rico vs. Bubba with the former pounding away and pulling in another table. Rosey comes back in but Bubba pounds away on him too. Now Jamal is in there too and it’s D-VON to the rescue! He’s on Smackdown at this point so this is a big deal. 3D puts Rico through the table to end this.

Rating: B-. That’s likely high but this was what you want to open a show. It helps a lot that this was a fifteen minute match instead of like six minutes like they are on Raw. This was fun and the pop for the reunion of the Dudleys (which would be permanent) was a feel good moment. Good stuff here and a good choice to open things up, especially in New York City.

Spike would get the European Title back and defend it at Insurrextion 2003.

Rodney Mack/Christopher Nowitski/Teddy Long vs. Dudley Boyz

Nowitski has a mask on because of a face injury. He was an imbecile in WWE but given the work he’s doing today you can overlook that I think. D-Von and Mack start us off and nothing of note is going on here. You really can tell here how little thought has been put into this. Why are these teams feuding again? Well of course we’re not going to be told.

Spike gets thrown over the top onto the heels as we’re just waiting on the Teddy beatdown. Bubba and Chris do the test of strength dancing spot which makes me shake my head violently. Spike comes in to waste a bit of our time. Nowitski is in the minority team because a Harvard education makes him a minority. Well that’s better than nothing I guess.

Mack was a pretty decent tough guy but nothing ever came of him. Teddy does the Bobby Heenan thing, beating on Spike and then running at the first sign of trouble. Five minutes have passed and not a thing of note has happened. Mack accidently clotheslines Teddy, D-Von takes down Mack, Spike pins Long. There you go and we’re done.

Rating: D-. This was on PPV in the third spot on a card. But hey, Vince says these individual brand shows are a good idea so they must be right? There’s no need to have Benoit or Angle or Lesnar on the card when we can have these matches right? Just get on to the next match on this tour of fun please.

Spike won a triple threat match to earn a Cruiserweight Title shot on Smackdown, July 29, 2004.

Cruiserweight Title: Rey Mysterio vs. Spike Dudley

They shake hands to start in a little sportsmanship. Feeling out process to start with both guys running the ropes and diving into a standoff. Rey grabs a hammerlock and Spike fires off some hard elbows to escape, much to Rey’s annoyance. They head outside with Spike choking away. Back in and Rey gets two off a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker before cranking on both of Spike’s arms.

Spike fights back with a headbutt to the ribs and a hard clothesline for two. A headscissors sends Rey face first into the buckle but he’s able to crotch Spike to prevent what looked to be a double stomp. Dudley’s sunset bomb is countered and Rey nails a low dropkick to the face. Mysterio misses a Lionsault press and gets bulldogged for a very close two. Cue D-Von for a distraction, allowing Bubba to nail Rey from behind. A Dudley Dog off the ropes gives Spike the title.

Rating: C. This wasn’t bad but it led to Spike turning heel and bossing the Dudleys around in one of the most bizarre booking decisions that I can ever remember. Spike was fine as a Crusierweight Champion even though he never did much as champion. The match was fine with Spike getting more and more violent before finally using the Dudleys to help when his own efforts didn’t work.

Spike would defend at Survivor Series 2004.

Cruiserweight Title: Spike Dudley vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Chavo Guerrero vs. Billy Kidman

Spike is defending and is a heel here. This is one fall to a finish. Kidman hurt Chavo on a Shooting Star Press and seemed to be proud of it, which resulted in a heel turn for him. The other good thing here is that they don’t have to tag. That’s always a waste of time in these things as you just wait for things to break down. Kidman and Spike form a quick alliance, only to have Kidman dropkick the champ out to the floor.

Rey sends Kidman to the floor and it’s off to Rey vs. Chavo who are apparently friends at this point. Oh please, like these two could EVER get along. Rey spins Chavo around with a headscissors before Spike sends Rey into the corner and stomps away while screaming. Chavo comes back in and a double clothesline puts himself and Spike down. With Kidman on the apron, Rey hits a rana to send him out to the floor in a cool looking spot.

Back in and Rey tries the sitout bulldog on Chavo but Guerrero throws him onto Kidman in a seated senton. Chavo dives on both of them, leaving Spike standing ta….short actually. Anyway the champ dives on all of them but they step aside to let him crash. Chavo finally gets his hands on Billy back in the ring but Spike comes back in to break up a pinfall attempt.

Rey misses a moonsault over Spike’s head and gets thrown to the floor as a result. We get a Tower of Doom with everyone minus Rey involved, so Rey comes in and tries to steal a pin. Rey charges at Kidman but gets caught in a BK Bomb (Sky High) for two but Chavo breaks up the Shooting Star. Spike hits a running headbutt to Rey’s ribs but the Dudley Dog is broken up. 619 hits Spike but Billy breaks up the West Coast Pop. Chavo hits the Gory Bomb on Spike but Kidman hits a slingshot legdrop on Chavo. Rey takes out Kidman and Spike steals the pin on Chavo to retain.

Rating: B-. Not a great match or anything here but it was fine for an opener. Rey was insanely popular still but Spike keeping the title was a great way to tick off the fans. There’s nothing wrong with a heel winning, as long as the opener fires up the crowd, which this did. Good choice.

After losing the title, Spike would drop through the floor in WWE before leaving in 2005. He would show up in TNA for a brief run as Brother Runt, including this match at Bound For Glory 2006.

Samoa Joe vs. Brother Runt vs. Raven vs. Abyss

This is Monster’s Ball which basically means hardcore. Jake Roberts is guest referee. This is also the third match in a row that isn’t a simple one on one or tag match. Everyone jumps Joe to start and knock him to the floor. Raven and Runt team up on Abyss with Runt being knocked to the outside. Runt brings in a chair and Raven hits his drop toehold on Abyss into the chair but Joe comes back in to make people care. Joe hits the Facewash on Raven but walks into a chokeslam.

Abyss runs over the ECW guys and throws Runt into the crowd from the ring to emulate Bigelow’s famous spot. Raven clotheslines Abyss to the floor and dives on him, which Abyss shrugs off without even leaving his feet. Joe hits a BIG corkscrew dive onto all three to put them all down while landing on his feet. Raven pops up and hits Joe with a Silence of the Lambs style mask of his.

They go up the ramp and Joe is knocked through a table off the ramp. Runt and Abyss climb up part of the set and Runt is chokeslammed onto a platform which doesn’t have much give at all. Something happens which results in Abyss landing on Runt but the camera is zoomed in on Roberts. The replay shows that it was kind of an elbow drop. Nice production work there guys.

Raven throws Joe through another table in a vain attempt to make us believe he won’t win. Is there a point to Roberts being referee at all here? He hasn’t done anything. Abyss gets two on Runt but Raven saves. Abyss drops an Earthquake splash down for two on Raven. Joe comes in to break up Shock Treatment by pounding on Abyss. He misses the backsplash but kicks Abyss low instead.

Powerslam onto a chair gets two. Raven drop toeholds Joe to the floor but Abyss knocks him down and loads up the tacks. Jake pulls out his bag but Raven jumps him and loads up a DDT on Jake. Abyss pours out the tacks but Joe pulls down the ropes to prevent Raven from going into the tacks via the Black Hole Slam. Joe knocks Abyss to his knees and hits the senton backsplash to put Abyss’ face into the tacks. Raven breaks up the choke but Jake DDTs him so that the MuscleBuster can give Joe the pin.

Rating: D. I know this is a sweeping statement, but this might be the most questionable choice in TNA history. Why in the world was Joe in this match? Jake added NOTHING here. He counted slow and I guess he didn’t hurt anything, but what difference did it make to have a guest referee? The match was your usual garbage but no one bought anyone but Joe having a chance here. Also did Runt fall into the same hole the James Gang and AMW fell into in the previous match?

Spike would head back to the indies and into retirement before returning for One Night Only: Hardcore Justice II.

Team 3D vs. Brother Runt/???

Tables match of course. It’s surprising to see Bully as an Ace when that turn wasn’t until months after this was taped. D-Von corners So Cal Val in the corner but doesn’t shove his crotch in her face at least. Bully Ray cuts a long and dull promo before the match about the awesomeness of Tea 3D while insulting a bunch of fans. Ray takes some jabs at Holly for no apparent reason before talking about using Runt as a pawn during the wedding to Brooke. He makes the same jokes about Dreamer and Sandman while saying Runt has no partner. Runt comes out and has a partner: Jeff Hardy.

The Dudleys send Jeff to the floor before Bubba drives Runt’s glasses into his forehead. D-Von beats on Runt with basic power stuff but Runt blocks a suplex, only to be taken down by a clothesline. Off to Ray for a wishbone split before yelling at Earl Hebner in the corner. Ray blocks the Dudley Dog and breaks up a sunset flip attempt but D-Von misses a middle rope headbutt, allowing Runt to make the hot tag.

Jeff cleans house with a low dropkick on D-Von as things break down. Bully kicks Jeff down but the Dudleys can’t hit What’s Up. Instead it’s Runt hitting one on D-Von before calling for the tables. Jeff brings in a table but Team 3D takes over again. A double suplex to Runt misses the table and Jeff hits a Twisting Stunner on D-Von. Runt adds the Dog to put D-Von on the table but Ray makes the save. Jeff and Runt take over again and Hardy splashes D-Von through a table (barely) for the win. It’s as lame of a build as it sounds.

Rating: D. This was nothing to see again with and felt like a bad house show main event. I get the idea of Brother Runt having history with the Dudleys, but we’ve seen this match so many times that it’s almost impossible to care about anymore. Jeff getting the win to end the show is the right idea to send the fans home happy but man it was dull getting there.

Spike is a guy that had some severe physical limitations but managed to turn it into a very nice little career. The giant killer stuff was the logical character for him but he was only able to do so much. The stuff when he stopped being all insane was the best time of his career and he and Molly were about as cute of a couple as there has ever been. The guy wasn’t great but given his size he was pretty solid.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of on the History of ECW Pay Per Views at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00NPPH0WI

And check out my Amazon author page with wrestling books for under $4 at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6