Monday Night Raw
Date: February 22, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Attendance: 1,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett, Randy Savage

This is going WAY back into the day, as in the show isn’t even two months old yet. This would be the seventh episode of the series and we’re coming up on Wrestlemania IX. The main story tonight though is that for the first time ever on Raw, Hulk Hogan will be live in the ring for one of the only times ever in the early days. It’s also Hogan’s first on screen appearance since around Wrestlemania of the previous year. Let’s get to it.

Rob Bartlett, a comedian who was on Raw in the early days (and has since admitted that he had no business there and knew he was terrible) says we’re live from New York for Monday Night Raw.

The announcers talk about the upcoming show for a bit and they do the “It’s uncut, uncooked and uncensored.” Again, why is it called Raw?

Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Scott Taylor

In a few years Taylor would change his last name to 2 Hotty. Bartlett: “Who is Bigelow fighting? Some guy they got off the street?” Taylor gets in a few shots to start but a BIG clothesline takes him right back down. An electric chair puts Bigelow down again as Savage has now started calling Hogan divine. He was a monster earlier and now he’s heavenly. A butterfly backbreaker sets up a pair of top rope headbutts to end the squash. Bigelow wins in case you’re some kind of schnook.

We get a pre recorded interview with Hogan where he says that the future for Hulkamania is really bright. Before he gets to that though, he talks about the past of Hulkamania where he is indeed a human being that has made mistakes. I think this is an admission of his steroid use but he never says those exact words. Granted he admitted it in the trial but that hadn’t happened yet.

Now Hogan talks about “tabloid terrorism” and goes onto a mini rant about how bad it is when someone says something and doesn’t back it up. I’m legitimately laughing out loud that HULK HOGAN is complaining about someone making false statements. Hogan issues a fifth demandment: Train, say your prayers, take your vitamins, believe in yourself and now, BELIEVE IN HULK HOGAN!

Nasty Boys/Tatanka vs. Shawn Michaels/Beverly Brothers

Shawn is IC Champion and feuding with Tatanka or about to be feuding with him. Apparently it’s the former. For clarity, the Beverlys are Beau and Blake and the Nastys are Jerry Sags and Brian Knobbs. It’s a big brawl to start until we get down to Sags vs. we’ll say Blake Beverly. It’s off to Knobbs and there’s a double Beverly Pit Stop (don’t ask). Tatanka vs. Shawn is official for Mania. Blake finally gets a boot up in the corner and it’s off to Shawn. The champ hits a jumping back elbow to take Knobbs down and the Brothers get in some cheating.

Knobbs escapes long enough to tag in Tatanka so Shawn goes running over to Beau for a tag. Tatanka hooks an armbar on Beau before it’s back to Sags for the same move. A shoulder breaker puts Beau down and it’s back to Tatanka for more cranking on the arm. Everything breaks down again and Beau keeps getting beaten up. Back to Brian for more beating in the corner and we take a break.

Back with Knobbs stomping away on Beau even more. Blake finally does something by low bridging Brian to give his brother control. Off to Blake legally now as Savage is talking about Boyz 2 Men. Shawn comes in but is only a decoy to allow the Brothers to do the Haas/Benjamin spot of one jumping over the other’s back to land on Brian’s back as he’s draped over the ropes. Off to Blake for a bearhug which goes nowhere so it’s off to Beau for some generic stomping.

Thankfully Shawn comes in to stop another tag or the match might have actually gotten interesting. That was a close call. Brian and Michaels clothesline each other and we get a tag off to Tatanka. A bit of house is cleaned and Tatanka gets two off a top rope chop. The Papoose To Go puts Shawn out but everything breaks down. We get down to Shawn vs. Tatanka and Shawn loads up the Teardrop Suplex but Tatanka reverses into a sunset flip for the upset pin.

Rating: D+. This match just kept going. I’m not sure if the Nastys and Beverlys were feuding at this point but they didn’t fight at Wrestlemania. Then again I’m surprised the Beverlys still had jobs at this point so it’s not a surprise that they’re filling in a spot in a six man tag here. WAY too long of a match here though and it wasn’t good enough to validate this amount of time.

Wrestlemania IX is coming to Caesar’s Palace in Las Vegas.

Speaking of people who shouldn’t have a job at this point, Sean Mooney is with the fans who are excited about Hogan being back.

BUY VARIOUS WWF MERCHANDISE!!!

Crush vs. Terry Taylor

It’s another squash as Crush gets to throw Taylor around for a bit. The interesting note during this match: Vince talks about Bill Clinton appointing Hulk to head up his physical fitness council. That’s all well and good, but we get a phone call from “Arnold Schwarzenegger” (Bartlett doing a decent impression), ranting about how he wants that position. Taylor hooks a chinlock and a jawbreaker before Crush throws him off. A few power moves set up the Headvice on Taylor for the submission.

Rating: D. Seriously, WHAT IS UP WITH THIS BARTLETT GUY??? I get that he’s a comedian, but that begs the question: if you want comedy, why is Bobby Heenan not doing this role? He’s a funny guy and actually knows what he’s talking about in wrestling. Bartlett is certainly trying but he’s just not in the right role here.

We recap Money Inc. smashing Beefcake’s already hurt face with a metal briefcase. This turned Jimmy Hart face and has brought Hogan back to avenge his friend.

Here’s Hogan for the first time on Monday Night Raw. He says he has a lot of stuff to talk about but first of all, it’s about Brutus Beefcake and his face injury. Hogan thanks God and Jimmy Hart for helping Brutus through this as apparently that’s enough to forgive Jimmy for about ten years of tormenting him. Hulk calls out Brutus, who looks pretty good for having his face crushed just a week or two ago.

Beefcake talks about how he was hurt last week but thankfully his face is now made of titanium so it didn’t do much damage. Well it broke his nose but that’s an acceptable loss. They bring out Jimmy Hart as their new manager and wouldn’t you know it: Jimmy has always wanted to manage Hulk. So is it like when you’re seven and you pick on the girls you like? Oh and they’re called the Mega Maniacs. Jimmy’s first assignment: get them matches with Money Inc., either singles or tag matches. This was another long segment with some stupid parts to it.

Wrestlemania is still happening at Caesar’s Palace. Nothing has changed in the last 20 minutes.

Hogan and Beefcake are still posing after the break.

Undertaker vs. Skinner

After the entrances we take a break with like two minutes left. Skinner clotheslines him to the floor but we have a G.I. Joe commercial to get through. Skinner pounds away on Undertaker and knocks him to the floor where Taker gets choked. Vince tells us that next week Bret is defending the world title against “one of the Headshrinkers.” Yeah they don’t even have an opponent yet. The show ends with the match still in progress.

Overall Rating: D. I know the shows were bad back in the day, but this was REALLY bad. Hogan and Beefcake teaming up with Hart was the focus of this show but it never clicked at all. Even when I was a kid (five at this point) I didn’t buy Jimmy Hart as Hogan’s friend. They were enemies and it didn’t work that all of a sudden they got along. Other than that the show was dull and didn’t have any good matches in sight. We’ll get back to 1993 eventually.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 28, 2002
Location: Richmond Coliseum, Richmond, Virginia
Attendance: 9,034
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re inching closer to No Way Out and I don’t think we have any matches announced for it yet. Granted it’s not like it matters as that’s just a stop before we get to HHH’s moment at Wrestlemania which I’m sure everyone is thrilled about. The main event tonight is Austin vs. Angle which sounds like a #1 contenders match to me. Oh and in case you were wondering what Vince’s announcement was, keep reading. Let’s get to it.

Kane vs. Big Show

We immediately open with a match and Big Show runs him over quickly. A clothesline puts Kane down again and an elbow drop gets two. Kane fights up and wins a brief slugout, only to get kicked in the face. That’s fine by Kane as he pops up and slams Show, only to go up and jump into the chokeslam for two. Show is STUNNED so he tries another chokeslam but Kane hits his version first for the fast pin. Not horrible actually.

Flair is in the office when the APA comes in. They yell about the people Vince is bringing in (I’m saving the reveal for later) and say these people are poison. Bradshaw wants a fight right now but the guys haven’t debuted yet.

Goldust quotes the Usual Suspects and talks about presumably Rock some more.

We get another clip from the Rumble of Maven eliminating Undertaker and the beating that followed. Since Maven was never eliminated from the Rumble, Maven gets a world title match tonight.

Jericho says he granted Maven the title match tonight because he’s a fighting champion. However, why are the people talking about Maven when Jericho got the biggest win of his career at the same Rumble? Tonight Jericho is going to watch Angle and Austin beat each other up and then at No Way Out, he’ll pick up the pieces.

Intercontinental Title: Rob Van Dam vs. William Regal

Regal is defending. Van Dam jumps Regal during the brass knuckles search and the fans go NUTS. Rob rams him into the steps before we head inside for the first time. There’s the stepover kick for two on Regal followed by the standing moonsault for the same. Not that it matters are Regal kicks Rob low for the LAME DQ.

Regal shoves the referee down and leaves with his belt. Rob goes after him though and pounds away but cue the Dudleys to beat down Van Dam. Edge makes the save for no apparent reason. I smell a tag match here. Regal comes back in and lays out Edge with the knuckles.

Stephanie comes in to yell at Flair for making HHH vs. Booker later tonight. Apparently it was Papa McMahon that made the match, not Flair. Ok then.

Lance Storm/Christian vs. Godfather/Diamond Dallas Page

Apparently Page is a client of Godfather’s escort service. Godfather and Storm start things off and a big back elbow puts Lance down. Christian pulls the rope down to stop Godfather and send him to the floor. Back inside a Storm dropkick gets two and Christian comes in to stomp away for a bit. A double Canadian suplex gets two and it’s back to Storm for a legdrop for two. Christian gets another two count but starts having a fit. Not hot tag brings in DDP who cleans part of the house. Christian goes up but gets crotched, allowing Godfather to hit the running splash, followed by a Diamond Cutter to Storm for the pin.

Rating: D. This came and went and was nothing of note. Godfather didn’t fit at all in the new WWF and it was very clear in a hurry. Page didn’t work in WWE either as there was no connection with the fans. Page grew up in WCW before the fans’ eyes, but here he’s a guy who used to be a big deal in WCW and that’s it. That isn’t going to work and never has before.

Vince is here and is almost in a trance. The limo was late to the show so the driver apologizes, but Vince just taps him on the arm and walks away. That’s not normal McMahon behavior to put it mildly.

Here’s Flair as we’re somehow in Flair Country again this week. He talks about beating Vince at the Rumble a few weeks ago, which led to Vince having a meltdown on Smackdown. The show saw Vince sitting in a chair for the entire show, talking about how he was going to destroy his own creation. At the end of the night, Vince spun around, revealing the letters N.W.O. on the back of his chair.

That’s who people have been worried about all night long and that’s who Flair wants to stop from coming. Therefore, Flair is going to appeal to Vince’s pride by showing a video he’s had made: The History of the WWF. Usually I don’t show videos in my reviews, but I can’t describe how good this is, as it covers EVERYTHING of note in company history. Check this out.

Flair asks Vince to come out and face him and here’s the (half) boss. Ric goes on a rant and a half about how Vince must be out of his mind to think of bringing those guys here. If Vince wants to beat up Flair, go right ahead if that keeps those guys out. If ANYONE in that video means anything to Vince, he shouldn’t do it.

Vince grabs the mic and says he wants 100% control of his company and he wants Flair out. If Flair sells Vince his stock back at the price Flair paid for it, no NWO. Vince gives him a few days to think about it, but if Flair says no then the poison of the NWO enters the WWF and destroys the company. Vince says that if his company is going down, everyone is going with him but he will be the last one to survive. AWESOME segment here and I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I want to see more of this stuff.

Nidia is at WWF New York and is excited about Maven’s title shot.

WWF World Title: Maven vs. Chris Jericho

Maven finally has some trunks. Jericho turns his back on Maven to start but gets jumped for his efforts. A decent dropkick gets two for the rookie and Jericho is STUNNED. They head to the floor where Maven gets his chest lit up by chops. Back inside and Jericho knocks him down before taking off a buckle pad. Maven escapes the Walls and launches Jericho into the exposed buckle for a VERY hot two. There’s a small package for the same and the fans are losing their minds here. Not that it matters though as the Walls are put on and Maven wisely taps out.

Rating: C+. Considering Maven debuted less than a year ago with NO seasoning, this was pretty awesome stuff. Those near falls were really close and the fans were totally into it. The one perk of having such a weak champion is that people buy into the idea that anyone can beat him, even someone like Maven. Not horrible by any account.

Post match heeeeeeeeere’s Taker for the big beatdown. He beats on Maven in the Tree of Woe and does the throat crush with a chair. Jericho is lounging back on commentary during the beating.

Taker threatens to make Coach’s teeth into a necklace if he says the name Maven in Taker’s presence again. The Dead Man goes on a rant about Maven and says that Maven is going to keep paying the price until it’s decided that the bill is paid up. As for Rock, it’s none of his business who eliminated Undertaker. Taker says he doesn’t sing and dance, and he won’t be disrespected by Rock.

Jazz finds Billy and Chuck “stretching”. Apparently groin stretches are next so Jazz leaves.

Stephanie yells about HHH’s match but HHH doesn’t seem to care who made the match with Booker. Oh and why did HHH take off his wedding ring for a match? HHH: “Because I’m wrestling.” Silly question, easy answer.

Trish Stratus/APA vs. Jazz/Billy and Chuck

The girls start and Jazz hits a big clothesline to take over. A dropkick sends Jazz out to the floor but she comes right back with a double chickenwing lift. Off to Chuck who shoves Trish down before it’s off to Bradshaw for a whooping. Chuck pounds away in the corner but Bradshaw shrugs it off and brings in Faarooq. A spinebuster puts Chuck down and everything breaks down. Trish tries a rana on Chuck but gets powerbombed down for two. Chuck made sure to not go chest to chest on her in a funny bit.

Rating: D. This went nowhere at all other than a funny comedy spot at the end. The tag division was dead at this point and I honestly can’t think of who the champions are here. Oh wait it’s a team that’s been together for all of six weeks and who won’t team together again after losing the titles. Nothing to see here.

Angle tells the fans WHAT: he’s going to No Way Out.

Booker T vs. HHH

They fight over a top wristlock to start and HHH takes him down to he mat where he can pound away. Now to mix it up, HHH pounds away in the corner, only to get dropped face first onto the buckle. Booker misses a spin kick and charges into a spinebuster to put both guys down. The jumping knee to the face staggers Booker and a neckbreaker gets two.

We head to the floor and HHH nails him with a clothesline before sending him back into the ring. Here’s Christian of all people to lay out HHH to give Booker a two count. There’s a facebuster to put Booker back down as Stephanie runs out to slap Christian in the face. HHH saves his wife but Booker rams them together, allowing him to roll up the Game and use a handful of trunks for the surprise pin.

Rating: D+. It’s pretty clear that new HHH isn’t nearly as good as the old one was. This was almost all punching and signature stuff before the screwy ending. Apparently Christian and HHH had some kind of interaction on Smackdown which is fine for a reason for the interference here. HHH would take a LONG time to get back into form.

HHH went OFF on Stephanie during the break and threw her out of the locker room.

Kurt Angle vs. Steve Austin

Winner gets the title shot at No Way Out. As is his custom, Austin starts pounding away on the floor before hitting a powerslam for two in the ring. There’s the Thesz Press and Angle is in trouble. Scratch that as Angle comes right back with a belly to belly overhead suplex for two. A hard whip sends Austin into the corner but he comes back with that whip spinebuster of his for a delayed two.

Angle comes back by rolling Germans but Austin comes back by sitting him on the top and chopping away. A top rope superplex takes Angle down for two and they head to the floor. Back in and a low blow puts Austin down. Angle slides in a chair but Austin intercepts it, only to hold his cool in a surprising turn of events.

Steve loads up the Stunner but gets shoved into the referee. Angle lays him out with the chair but only gets two when the referee is back up. There’s the ankle lock but Austin finally grabs the rope. The Angle Slam gets two as Austin gets his foot on the rope but Kurt of course things he won. The referee tells him what happened but he walks into a Stunner to send Austin to No Way Out.

Rating: B. Austin and Angle were guys that had great chemistry together and they showed it again here. As I’ve said before, Austin’s in ring abilities are often forgotten, which is a shame because he’s an excellent performer inside the ring. This worked very well and it made you believe Jericho was in real trouble when we get to the PPV.

Post match Jericho charges in but gets a Stunner of his own.

Overall Rating: B. This is a show where what was weak was quite weak but what was good was OUTSTANDING. The history video is as good as you will ever see and I’d love to see an updated one for the modern era. Either way, this is pretty easily the show of the year so far with some excellent stuff and mostly short bad stuff. That’s a great help to the show and it worked quite well.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

In Your House 6: Rage in the Cage
Date: February 18, 1996
Location: Louisville Gardens, Louisville, Kentucky
Attendance: 5.500
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler

This show took place an hour away from me, and somehow I never heard about it once. I didn’t know it was in Louisville until I rented the tape in May. That’s how great the advertising was. Anyway, this was the follow up show to the Royal Rumble and the build up for Wrestlemania 12. At the previous show, the winner of the Rumble was Shawn Michaels as he was finally launched into the main event scene which he has never really left.

Also on the card, Goldust got the IC Title from Razor in what was supposed to be culminated in a street fight at Mania in March, but Razor was suspended for drug issues. He was gone in May and 8 days after his last match he was on Nitro, officially beginning the NWO angle which changed wrestling forever.

The other big match was Taker vs. Hart for the world title, which Taker won by DQ when Diesel interfered at the end and was caught. Since Taker had his shot already, Diesel was named the new #1 contender, which is your main event tonight: Diesel vs. Bret in a cage match. Taker, for some reason, is YET AGAIN in the dark match, this time continuing his completely forgotten IC Title feud with Goldust.

However, he’s featured prominently in the recap video at the beginning, so him doing something in the main event is pretty much a given at this point. In what I am completely stunned by, we start with that age old struggle of good vs. evil: Razor Ramon vs. The 1-2-3 Kid!

Razor Ramon vs. 1-2-3 Kid

This is a crybaby match, meaning the loser is put in a diaper.  Ok, let me make sure I’ve got this straight. The Kid got his first win over Razor in May of 1993, and now, THREE YEARS LATER they’re still in the same program? My goodness this is absurd. You have one of the most over faces on the roster and you stick him with the exact same guy for this long? Seriously, no program goes that long. Even Austin and Vince had some time apart in their epic feud and I don’t think that went three years did it?

Good grief no wonder Razor bailed as soon as he could. In this brilliant idea, they have a standard match and the loser is put in a diaper. As I’m writing this review, I’ve got my eyes closed and am shaking my head. This is mind numbingly stupid. Did Razor light Stephanie’s dog on fire or something one day?

Fink is announcing tonight, so this show just went way up in value. They do us the favor of showing us the “in depth” history of these two, which apparently goes back 4 weeks instead of three years. Kid cost Razor the IC Title at the Rumble in case you were interested. The Kid brings out a stroller with a Razor teddy bear in it as my intelligence is withering away at this. Yes kids, the WWF can actually make you stupid.

Oh and Kid’s face and heel music are still the same, which is never a good idea. Are you listening Jericho? Change your freaking music already. Hokey soke the Kid used a springboard move. THAT’S WHAT HE SHOULD ALWAYS HAVE DONE! No one would buy the Kid, a guy that weighs about 210 being able to go toe to toe with anyone. Him using the ropes made sense, but I don’t ever remember him doing it other than right there, and so far he hasn’t done it again in this match. In a really dumb spot, DiBiase throws baby powder in Razor’s eyes. Ok, that makes sense.

However, the referee is looking RIGHT AT HIM when he does it and says nothing at all. Kid is slowly starting to incorporate the crotch chop. The awfulness of that gimmick was apparently long standing. Oh great, it’s a sleeper. Oh sweet he’s not in it long. They botch……something. Not sure what that was supposed to be, and they end up in yet another sleeper, this time with Kid on Razor’s back. Oh the symbolism in that.

The Kid, hanging on to Razor, forcing Razor to carry the Kid, yet at the same time cutting off Razor’s life and making him drowsy and boring. I’ve been watching WAY too much wrestling lately. Vince actually says Razor is going nighty night. My life is now complete. Eventually the powder trick backfires as the Kid takes it in the eyes, Razor’s Edge, 1, 2, Razor picks him up. I want to hurt that man severely.

What have I done to deserve such torment? Why does this have to continue? Another Edge, and that ends it……please? THANK GOODNESS. Post match….blast it, the Kid is put into a diaper and fed a bottle as I could go for a bottle myself, but I’d like something with massive amounts of either alcohol or drugs mixed in so I can hopefully forget this match happened.

Rating: D. The wrestling is ok I guess, but dear lord these guys have been either teaming or feuding for almost three full years. What’s the point anymore? No one wanted to see this match again. Razor would have drug issues soon thereafter and not get to have his blowoff match with Goldust at Mania. He would come back to job to Vader and he would be in WCW within a month. He’s a lucky man indeed.

HHH vs. Duke Droese

Droese is a wrestling garbage man. I wish I was making that up, and that’s all there really is to say about that. Duke says he’ll take HHH out like yesterday’s garbage. Duke’s nickname is the Dumpster. Who in the world thought that would be a good nickname? Anyway, this started because HHH cut Duke’s hair on Superstars a few weeks ago.

They had a one on one match before the Rumble with the winner getting the 30 spot and the loser getting the 1 spot. Duke of all people wound up getting the 30 spot and of course, he was gone in about a minute. This match is just hard to comment on as absolutely no one cares at all. The crowd is so dead that it’s pitiful. The biggest problem here is that no one, and I mean no one cares about Duke.

I mean really, a freaking garbage collector? He has his name across his shirt. Is that in case he gets lost or something? They keep cutting to a split screen with HHH’s date and Lawler. No one cares. The hype for the Superstar line is never ending. It was a thing where you could talk to the wrestlers in the previous matches. Cool idea, but it was a one in a million shot of getting through. Either that or it was likely prerecorded comments.

The crowd is so dead it’s pathetic. They were somewhat hot for the last match so it can’t be the crowd as a whole. This match is just awful in general. Duke hits his finisher but of course doesn’t cover. He instead goes and gets his garbage can, but the referee throws it out. HHH hits him with the lid and pins him.

Rating: C-. Simply put, no one wanted to watch this and it was obvious. You could see that there were big plans for HHH, but no one knew how big. I’ll get to what the full extent of those plans were as well as how they inadvertently saved the company in our next review. Also, the next woman that HHH had with him will be known as Sable, at Wrestlemania.

We see a recap of two weeks ago when Yoko turned face by attacking his manager Jim Cornette. That leads us to this match.

For the first time, Yoko cuts his own promo, with no Japanese accent at all. He says he’s tired of Cornette taking all the credit for the work he did. Makes sense actually. Michael Hayes being taller than Yoko makes me laugh. Hayes saying get ready for a train wreck makes me laugh even harder.

Yokozuna vs. British Bulldog

Oh this isn’t going to be pleasant at all. Yoko at this point was just too fat to do anything with. He was nearing seven hundred pounds and was on his last legs in the company as well as in his career. They figured that the best way to do anything with him would be to put him with a power guy so they put him with Bulldog. It is failing miserably. Yoko is dominating at the beginning but after that it’s just bad.

More or less Yoko destroys Smith and goes to set up for the Banzai but Cornette hits him in the back with the racket for the DQ. Post match Yoko stalks Cornette but Vader runs out to save him. He and Smith beat down Yoko after handcuffing him to the ropes. Suits and officials run in to break it up.

Rating: F. This was five minutes of clotheslines, punches and forearms. Total waste of time and just a way to get Vader to look dominant as he was being pushed as the monster heel. Yoko’s size is just sad to look at by this point.

We see a recap of Owen and Shawn’s rivalry, mainly focusing on Owen injuring Shawn to the point where he had to release the IC Title. Since then, Owen had been bragging about putting Shawn out of action etc. That brings us here, as Shawn had already won the Rumble and the guaranteed title shot. He puts it on the line for a chance at retribution with Owen.

Owen Hart vs. Shawn Michaels

As I’ve said many times, this should have been your main event at Royal Rumble 1998 instead of Shawn vs. Taker or whatever. Owen did the run in at the end of DX IYH, yet Shawn was afraid Owen would shoot on him and humiliate him, so instead we got Shawn vs. Taker where Shawn hurt his back.

Tell me Shawn vs. Owen after Montreal wouldn’t have been straight MONEY. A guy like Owen that could keep up with a guy like Shawn? How could that not just be sweet, factoring in the Montreal aspect? Oh well at least we get it one time. Here you are. Note the foreshadowing of the legendary WM 12 entrance by how he comes to the ring here.

Shawn says he’ll win tonight and that’s a guarantee. He comes in off the roof of the In Your House set which is kind of cool. Owen bails as we fill in even more time here. We get fireworks before the match starts. The ending is pretty clear here but that doesn’t mean we’re not going to have a good match. Can’t beat that.

Technical stuff to start which shouldn’t surprise anyone. Shawn is showboating already so at least he’s not wasting time in that regard. Owen heads to the floor and Shawn hits a huge dive to take him out. Nothing serious at all so far but it’s all Shawn. Both guys nip up and Shawn gets a Frankensteiner to continue his dominance.

Big old belly to belly catches Shawn and Owen takes over. Jerry begs Owen to kick him in the head. You can’t say he’s not violent. Camel clutch goes on as Shawn is in trouble. Shawn has a bad head and neck so Owen goes on his back. Jerry gives Owen credit for the camel clutch. As in saying Owen invented it.

After some brief comeback attempts by Shawn he gets a suplex over the ropes to the floor. There’s a different look here as it looks less professional which isn’t something you often have to say about a WWF show. And then Owen catches him in a powerslam from the apron to the floor which looked painful.

Back in the ring and Owen takes his head off with a running clothesline but doesn’t cover. Even Lawler thinks that’s a bad idea. Sharpshooter goes on but you can tell it’s not a Bret one as the bell hasn’t rung yet and we’ve had it on for more than 2 seconds. Ropes are grabbed shortly thereafter.

I forgot how annoying Vince’s “HE GOT HIM! NO HE DIDN’T” stuff was. The head killing enziguri hits and Shawn goes to the floor. This only gets two though and the fans are happy. Or maybe they found pennies. Forearm and nip up follow but oddly enough Owen gets up first. How often do you see that?

Big elbows hits and Shawn drills Cornette for general purposes. Enziguri #2 misses and Sweet Chin Music sends Shawn to Mania, which I’m sure he would have been at anyway but since that’s a common expression we’ll say it anyway. Solid match as you would expect. He dances with a little girl in the ring too.

Rating: A-. This match made the show. Up until now it was one of the worst shows I’d ever seen but then we get to this. While it’s not a classic or really anything close to it, this is nothing short of a breath of fresh air. You have two guys that could go in the ring, a good storyline, and while it was fairly obvious Shawn would win, it was fun to see. Good match and light years ahead of everything else so far tonight.

Next up we have an interview with the interim president of the company: Roddy Piper. At the time, Vince hadn’t been revealed as the owner of the company. He was just the commentator and nothing more than that. So, we had a guy that would be called the President. For years and years it was this guy named Jack Tunney (Santino referenced him before WM this year in case you were wondering where you had heard that name before).

Once Tunney retired, Gorilla Monsoon took over. However, the night after the Rumble, Vader beat the heck out of him, so while he’s on the shelf, Piper is in charge. His run ends at WM 12. He starts off by saying that HBK better be ready because he’ll be in for the fight of his life no matter what and there must be a winner, which is foreshadowing the overtime in the Iron Man Match.

He says he has no sympathy for Yoko getting beaten down earlier because Yoko is too big to be attacked like that. He insults Vader. Piper cracking jokes about Mr. T. is funny stuff. Piper makes Yoko vs. Vader for WM 12. That becomes a 6 man tag. Cornette and Vader interrupt but Piper shouts Cornette down which is just hilarious.

Ladies and Gentlemen, take notes: these are two of the greatest, if not the two greatest talkers of all time in this business. More or less, Cornette says that Vader will crush everyone. Piper says that there’s going to be a fight at Mania. COrnette and his lawyer argue as Piper leaves.

WWF Title: Diesel vs. Bret Hart

As we’ve already established, this is a cage match and the rematch from the Survivor Series. They’re using the old school blue cage so this should be good indeed. Bret’s always had good cage matches and this was when Nash was still solid in the ring. Pretty slow start but that’s fine here. Right now it’s just a match with walls around them. Not bad by any means though. Bret works on Diesel’s knee for most of the match for your psychology aspect.

This really is more of just a one on one match with the cage as a small element, which is workable. It’s been a good match thus far with a story to it. That story being that Bret is trying to incapacitate Diesel so his size can’t help him out of the cage. We also get some good false finishes as both get close to escape but the other makes a last second save. The way the commentators are talking, Bret is retiring after this match.

I especially love how they talk about what a great champion Bret has been, when he’s been world champion less than three months at this point. Based on that commentary alone and knowing the hidden messages that come from commentators, it was obvious that Bret was winning here. The crowd is really into this so it’s going well at least. After nearly twenty minutes, Diesel is crawling for the door and he kicks Bret off of him so he’s all alone.

As he’s about to get out, the mat splits open and the Undertaker rises through the hole, pulling Diesel down into it screaming. Smoke flies out of it as Bret climbs out of the cage to keep the title, setting up the famous Mania main event. Post match Diesel comes out of the hole and runs from Taker who climbs to the top of the cage to stare Diesel down as Paul Bearer arrives with a new urn.

Rating: B+. Very solid stuff here. No one really expected Diesel to win but they made it entertaining anyway. Everyone knew Taker was going to get involved, but these two managed to make us forget about that. That is great work as they got our attention away so the ending was surprising. Solid stuff here and by far the best main event in the series’ history.

In the back, Piper makes the obvious match for Mania: Diesel vs. Taker, to close the show.

Overall Rating: C. There are only 5 matches so we have very little to grade. The first three matches absolutely sucked. There’s no other way to describe them. They were boring, uninteresting and just a waste of time. The other two matches however, the ones used to set up Mania which was the point of the show, were both very good if not great.

It finished strong which was what it was supposed to do so it redeems a lot of the mistakes it made earlier. Not really recommended, but not recommended to avoid either.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 21, 2002
Location: BI-LO Center, Greenville, South Carolina
Attendance: 9,420
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re done with the Rumble now and the road is pointing to HHH vs. Chris Jericho at the Rumble. Other than that….there’s not much going on here. Basically it’s all about HHH for the next seven or eight weeks, but now we need to bring in Stephanie as well because what would Monday Night Raw be without her? Let’s get to it.

We open with the Martin Luther King Day video. What is Vince’s obsession with that holiday? Not that I’m complaining but he never misses that thing.

We recap the winners of the Rumbles over the years before getting to HHH’s win last night.

Rob Van Dam/Tazz/Spike Dudley vs. Booker T/Dudley Boys

Booker eliminated RVD last night to set this up. Spike is in a neck brace. Booker and RVD start things off by trading some forearms. Booker takes him down but stupidly tries to get into a kicking battle with Rob freaking Van Dam. Why in the world would you think that was a good idea? A dropkick and standing moonsault get two for Rob and it’s off to Tazz. Some Dudley interference lets Booker take over before it’s off to D-Von.

The jumping back elbow puts Tazz down and there’s a tag to Bubba who knocks Spike off the apron. There’s the ax kick from Booker but instead of the Spinarooni it’s back to D-Von for more pounding in the corner. A legdrop gets two on Tazz and D-Von throws him to the floor. After some cheating by Bubba we head back inside where Tazz hits a quick suplex on D-Von to put both guys down.

The hot tag brings in RVD and let the rolls and flips begin. Rob cleans house but gets caught in the reverse 3D for two. Everything breaks down and everyone hits something, including a 3D to Tazz. As Bubba is getting up though, Van Dam hits him with the Five Star for the surprise pin.

Rating: C. This was a nice little tag match and the surprise ending made it that much better. I’m still a big fan of combining feuds like this as it allows them to save time while giving us some fresh matchups at the same time. This lets both feuds continue as a combination of both were involved in the fall. Decent stuff here.

It’s Jericho time as he gets to gloat over keeping the title last night over the Rock. Jericho talks about how everyone knew Rock was going to win but he shocked the world. This is the kind of promo that Punk could have had after this year’s Rumble but they went with the logical booking instead, which was probably the right move. Jericho demands respect and appreciation for his accomplishments, which are indeed pretty awesome. He wants a standing ovation but here’s HHH instead.

The Game gives Jericho some applause and says Jericho has never beaten HHH. He talks about going to Wrestlemania to face Jericho, assuming Jericho keeps the title. In two months, Jericho has to be larger than life, because that’s what it’s going to take to face HHH at Wrestlemania. At Wrestlemania, it will be time for Jericho to play the Game.

This brings out Kurt Angle for his second interruption of HHH in three weeks. He yells at HHH for jumping him from behind to eliminate him in the Rumble last night. The brawl is on but Jericho hits HHH with the belt to stop it short. Jericho puts him in the Walls but Rock comes out to make the save.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. William Regal

Regal won the title last night with the aide of brass knuckles. Edge jumps him on the floor while the referee looks everywhere for the brass knucks. Regal is sent over the barricade and suplexed right back to ringside as Edge is on fire early on. There’s the bell as Edge comes in with a missile dropkick for two. A belly to back suplex gets two more and Regal bails to the outside.

They head to the floor for a bit and the champion sends him shoulder first into the post to take over. Regal fires off some knees tot he shoulder like a good villain before hooking a chinlock. That goes nowhere so the Canadian fights up and hits a cross body and a spinwheel kick to drop Willy. The Edge-O-Matic gets two so Edge goes up, allowing Regal to pull out the knuckles. Edge knocks them away though and decks Regal with the for….two as Patrick sees the knuckles and calls for the DQ.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t awful but it didn’t do much for me. Regal was only a short term champion anyway as he would lose the belt at Mania in the opening match. Edge would of course have the logical feud from here: fighting Booker T over a Japanese shampoo commercial. Don’t you see the connection?

Edge beats up some referees post match.

Post break Edge is taken out of the arena.

Kane and Big Show talk for a bit about Kane eliminating him from the Rumble last night. Show leaves and Billy and Chuck come in (instead of out). They offer Kane a spot on the team complete with his own headband. A two on one beatdown ensues when he says no. Ok then.

Mr. Perfect and Debra chat about Austin. This also goes nowhere.

Here’s Flair to liven things up a bit. He says we’re in Flair Country tonight and thanks the fans for supporting him for 25 years. In that time he left his family behind because he was blinded by ambition to be the best. The only thing he knew about his children was that he was there when they were born. He couldn’t be at their ball games or recitals because he had to be wrestling around the world. Flair doesn’t regret a bit of it because the fans became his family. Lawler: “Good to see he’s got his priorities in order.”

In recent years though, Flair has wanted to become a better father who his kids can look up to. That’s why when Vince started to screw with him and his family, Flair had to change his catchphrase to “to be the man, you’ve got to beat Vince McMahon.” Last night, Vince took a camera from Flair’s kids’ hands and took pictures of Flair’s bloody face. Then Flair’s daughter got the camera back and took a shot of Vince’s bloody face. We see the picture and WOW Vince’s eyes looked insane.

Anyway here’s a bandaged Vince to stare down Ric. Flair takes his jacket off but Vince leaves his on. He says people think he lost at the Rumble, but apparently Flair lost too. Vince says that after last night, Flair is going to do something bad. Something so bad that even Vince might regret it. Flair is going to see what it is and that’s it. That announcement would come on Smackdown.

Val Venis vs. Mr. Perfect

Both guys returned at the Rumble last night. Val does the Rick Rude thing, although instead of getting a kiss, she gets to remove his towel. He doesn’t even want to know her name so they don’t get too attached. Val kisses her anyway. Perfect takes him into the corner for some hard chops but Val comes back with some knees to the ribs. A clothesline puts Val down…and here’s Austin. He BLASTS Perfect in the head with a chair, presumably for something from the Rumble last night. The match is thrown out.

Val gets in Austin’s face and gets the Stunner he deserves. Austin has a story for us tonight: it’s about a man named Jed, a poor mountaineer who barely kept his family fed. Austin goes through the entire theme song (get some culture if you don’t know what I’m talking about) but says that’s not the story he’s here to tell us. Instead he wants to talk about Steve Austin going to the Royal Rumble.

He ate a bunch of Mexican food and drank a lot of alcohol but last night he was hoodwinked, bamboozled and flabbergasted by two guys from behind. He’s entering the 2003 Royal Rumble right now and is going to Wrestlemania this year to beat someone up. Austin gets into nearly a sermon, talking about how he’s going to bloody and torture someone at Wrestlemania. The direction for this seemed to be “Austin, go fill up five minutes because we have no idea what to do tonight.”

Big Show/Kane vs. Billy and Chuck

Big Show is a surprise partner and the brawl starts on the ramp. Kane gets Billy in the ring and launches fire from the posts. Chuck gets kicked in the face and it’s off to Big Show as he and Chuck are legal. Billy is pulled in as well as Show is beating up everything in sight. Kane goes up top but Show accidentally knocks him to the floor. Chuck takes Big Show’s leg out and the Fameasser is enough for the pin. Next.

HHH yells at Rock for saving him earlier, which makes Rock ask a very good question: why is HHH so mad all the time when he’s going to Wrestlemania? Rock recommends some ice cream and a ham and cheese sammich. Oh and he wasn’t saving HHH earlier. It was just a preview for Angle and Jericho.

We get a clip of Maven eliminating Undertaker in a legit shocking moment last night.

The APA is at WWF New York.

The newly legit Godfather is here, now owning an escort service instead of being a pimp. He says he’s in the Yellow Pages now and this needs to end already. It’s time to dance but here’s Lance Storm to complain. Storm: “This business is as legitimate as a three legged donkey….which is illegitimate as a donkey of course has four legs.” Storm tries to clear out the ring but Godfather hits the running splash in the corner to dispatch the Canadian.

Goldust says there’s a star that burns brighter than he does and Goldie is coming for him.

Stephanie yells at HHH for being Rock’s partner tonight. She tells him to go beat up Rock but HHH tells her everything doesn’t revolve around her. He finally tells her to shut up and walks out.

The Rock/HHH vs. Kurt Angle/Chris Jericho

Rock and Angle start things off but it’s quickly off to Jericho as the villains take over. Jericho shoulders him down but Rock nips up and hits a spear of all things to put the Canadian down. Off to HHH as the beating continues. Chris is slammed off the top and HHH hooks a running choke to keep the pressure on. Back to Rock for a release belly to belly suplex and a spinebuster to set up the Elbow, but Angle low bridges him to the floor.

Rock gets to play Ricky Morton for a bit as Jericho drops a bunch of elbows for two. Back to Angle who gets punched in the face and put in the Sharpshooter, only for Jericho to quickly break it up. A DDT puts Chris down and there’s the double tag to bring in HHH and Angle. The Game beats up both evildoers and catapults Jericho out to the floor. Angle gets speared as well and Jericho gets crotched.

There’s the Pedigree for Angle but Jericho dives off the top for the save. It’s off to Rock vs. Jericho with the champion getting punched over and over. Jericho is knocked to the floor and grabs the bell but hits his own partner before walking into the Rock Bottom to end things. Nice job of making the champion look strong going into Mania.

Rating: C. The match was a standard main event tag match which means it was just ok at best. Jericho getting pinned makes me roll my eyes more than anything else, but it’s not like HHH wasn’t clearly winning the title the second his return date was announced. The match was just ok but star power helped it a lot.

Overall Rating: C-. This show was more disappointing than anything else. The problem here was mainly the Attitude Era guys being brought back in but only being warmed over imitations of what they used to be. In 2002, I don’t care about Val Venis or Godfather or Goldust. On top of that, we’re coming up on the most obvious main event of Wrestlemania since 1998, but that’s going to be overshaddowed by what’s coming on Smackdown. Not that it’s a good thing mind you, but it’s big.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my Monday Night Raw 1998 Reviews ebook on Amazon at:

In Your House 13: Final Four
Date: February 16, 1997
Location: UTC Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee
Attendance: 6,399
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

Well we’re in between the Rumble and Mania and DANG if it’s not a weird time in the WWF. There is no world champion at the moment but we’ll get to that. To begin with let’s recap the Rumble which should explain a lot. Three things happened there: Vader beat Taker with help from Paul Bearer, Shawn got the WWF Title back from Sid, and most importantly Steve Austin won the Royal Rumble in a stunning shock.

OR DID HE???

Well yes but he shouldn’t have. Your final five men were Bret, Taker, Vader, Austin and the fake Diesel (Kane). Mankind and Terry Funk were fighting on the floor which had the attention of the referees. During this fight, Hart eliminated Austin but no referee saw it. Austin got back in, eliminated Vader and Taker just after Hart eliminated Diesel. Austin took out Hart and the referees turned around to see him alone in the ring.

Austin is declared the winner and therefore the #1 contender. HOWEVER, Gorilla Monsoon doesn’t like this so he makes a match for this PPV which he dubs Final Four. Austin, Hart, Taker and Vader, the final four men in the ring in the Rumble, would have a match at the PPV for the right to go to Mania. Ok, that’s all well and good. However, there was a special Thursday edition of Raw where Shawn forfeited the title, citing a knee injury and a lost smile.

That night he had been scheduled to face Sid in a title match, so instead of just naming Sid Champion, the four way match at the PPV was now for the title with the winner facing Sid the following night on Raw for the title. Did you get all that?

That leads us here. Also on the card we have Furnas and LaFon (don’t ask) challenging for the tag belts as well as Rocky Maivia defending the IC Title that he took from HHH on the same Thursday Raw against HHH in a rematch. This is your last PPV before WM 13, so it better rock. Let’s see if it rocks or just Flex Kavanas.

Marc Mero vs. Leif Cassidy

We open with this, as in just after the recap we hear Sable’s music begin. You can tell the camera people either don’t care about this match or are just really stupid as Mero is in the ring and his pyro is going off before we even see him for the first time.

Sable has got her classic look down now: long blonde hair, one piece black leather outfit, big earrings and sunglasses. Just…dang. Anyway, Cassidy is already in the ring so how good are you expecting this match to really be? I actually like Cassidy’s stuff better than Mero’s. Let that sink in for a bit. Your psychology for this match is Cassidy works on Mero’s knee. Mero is your face here…I think.

Actually it’s more like Sable is the face and Marc is hers but that’s neither here nor there. Snow really can carry a match when he’s allowed to. It’s not something anyone cares about though as it’s Leif Cassidy vs. Marc Mero but Snow (Cassidy in case you didn’t pick up on that) is handling this very well.

Everything he does makes sense and has a point to it. There’s no noticeably stupid moves anywhere which is a very nice break. He goes after Sable though and Mero rescues her. After this he hits like three moves and no sells the knee injury to hit his shooting star press to win it.

Rating: D. If I could split this up into two ratings it would be an F for Mero and an A for Cassidy. Mero was just awful out there. He was on defense for probably 80-85 percent of the match, slams Cassidy’s head twice, hits a bad Samoan drop and his finisher to win while no selling the whole point of the match. Snow on the other hand was crisp, solid, and logical. You’re facing a high flier, keep him on the mat.

That’s smart wrestling and something that makes sense to do. He even threw in a figure four, which to be fair was the absolute worst I’ve ever seen but he was at least trying. I was impressed with him but Mero was just awful. Sable of course was the highlight with her looks, but it was close.

Now we get a double shot of weirdness. To begin with, immediately after that match, Honky Tonk Man comes out. Now, that’s not incredibly weird because based on the reaction I would assume that he’d been around a bit lately as the announcers and the crowd don’t seem stunned by his appearance.

I know he had an angle coming up that had either already started or started tonight but we’ll cover that later. The really weird part comes when he’s about to get into the ring.

We cut to a video package recapping Shawn’s forfeiting the title which shows the entire speech, Gorilla’s announcement of the title being on the line in the Four Way, and then we go to an interview with Sid. Just comes from nowhere and while it would usually be fine, why have HTM come out and then show it? He didn’t even get to have his music end.

As for the speech, here’s my take on it: you can believe him or not, and I personally think that he was at least half telling the truth, but he’s made it clear that the knee was nowhere near as bad as he implied. He had a minor surgery that could have waited but he says he very well may be retiring because of it. All I know is this: for a long stretch in that interview you could hear a pin drop in the audience.

People were on the verge of tears because Shawn might have to go. You can like Shawn you can hate Shawn you can be indifferent to him as I am for the most part, but the people loved him and that simply cannot be denied. What I believe however is that he simply didn’t want to lose to Bret at Mania 13. It was very clear that was where they were going with things, but Shawn just didn’t want to do it so he backed out.

Anyway, Sid says he’s taking the title tomorrow.

Flash Funk/Bart Gunn/Goldust vs. Nation of Domination

Flash’s entrance takes a ridiculous amount of time as he and his ladies, who are sexy in an odd way, just have to have a full dance sequence in the ring. As his illustrious partners make their way to the ring, we get a recap to explain this “feud”. Apparently all three of our jobbers have been unfairly beaten by the NOD thanks to their gang mentality. The Nation makes their entrance and look like the NWO.

I kid you not, there are 9 people in this stable. A checklist: 2 white rappers, Clarence Mason, D’lo Brown, Farrooq, Crush, Savio Vega and two guys who were apparently actors hired to look like the NOD was bigger than it really was, which is actually a good idea. That’s a huge freaking stable and their coming through the crowd and rapping their own music was genius.

This match goes under 7 minutes so this is going to be a relatively short review. Basically here all that happens is a six man tag. It’s as simple as that. This is a basic 6 man tag match. It’s not great and it’s not bad. It’s just your standard run of the mill 6 man tag. Faces start strong, heel takes over, you get a face comeback and the heels win. There is however one sick spot in it. Funk is getting double teamed by Savio and Farrooq.

They send him into the ropes for a double clothesline but he grabs their arms and in one motion backflips over them to land a double clothesline of his own. I was very impressed by this move as it just looks sick. Finish comes when Crush drops a leg on Bart to let Farrooq pin him.

Rating: C-. Now stop me if you’re heard this one before: a cowboy, a pimp and a man that is of the homosexual persuasion walk into a bar. Seriously we have those three gimmicks against a group modeled on the Black Panthers. How over the top can you get? And Vince has the nerve to wonder why the NWO was kicking his head in in the ratings at the time? Give me a break.

In the back Doc is with Steve Austin. He talks about how Austin hasn’t beaten any of the three men he’s in the ring with. Austin says he did at the Rumble and there’s a conspiracy against him by everyone in the company with any kind of power.

IC Title: HHH vs. Rocky Maivia

This is the rematch from three days prior as Rocky shocked the world and took the IC title from HHH. Helmsley has gotten to the best heel music I can remember in a long time as he comes out to Beethoven’s Ode To Joy now. Dang that’s some sweet music for a heel. He’s also dropped the random woman valet which helps a lot as well in my eyes. He’s becoming much more deadly in the ring and the HHH character is coming soon.

HHH is a twig at this point, maybe cracking 245 soaking wet. Rocky was still a rookie at this point but you could see the star in him just begging to get out with a gimmick change. HHH was on the verge of stardom but not as naturally. Early on the botch a baseball slide spot but HHH does a great improvised spot where he turns it into a drop toehold. This is a pretty good match so far with some good one liners from the King.

HHH is so rich he takes taxis to drive in movies. You could see the chemistry that these two had even this young in their careers. They knew how to get the best out of one another and that’s not something that can be taught to you by anyone. The commentators do a comparison of the people that trained both men to kill some time. JR mistakenly says that was a nice slupex by HHH so you can see him starting to slip even 12 years ago.

HHH and Hebner do their usual thing of Earl not being willing to be intimidated by HHH. HHH hits a perfect jumping knee to the face which might be the best he’s ever done. This is a very good match as it’s hard hitting and has a lot of near falls. However, they of course ruin it with the finish. Goldust whom HHH was feuding with at the time comes and stands in the aisle allowing Maivia to hit a German suplex to get the pin.

Post match Marlena gets choked out by some big woman/man with black hair that would come to be known as Chyna. Goldust says “throw her in jail.” They did a decent job of implying she was just a fan but the replay of it kind of gives it away.

Rating: B+. This was a very good match and if it had a finish could have been great. These two just put on great matches together no matter what and this was no exception. Rocky would go on to have a nice little reign with the title while HHH would go on to do nothing over the Summer but would starting hanging out with Shawn Michaels and that creature that just interfered in a little thing that would come to be called DX.

Promo for Mania airs.

Kevin Kelly interviews Vader who says he’ll be taking down all three men tonight. Paul Bearer says the same thing.

Tag Titles: Furnas/LaFon vs. Owen/Bulldog

This was a strange match. The story is that the champions have been arguing a lot lately and at the same time they lost in a Survivor Series match to these same two guys, resulting in this tag match. Now I know nothing about the challengers at all but to be fair I really hadn’t seen much of them. These guys were actually good. They were great movers out there and had some great technical stuff.

The person that stood out the most though was the referee. He was just flat out bad here. He kept taking forever as he kept wanting people out of the ring etc. and while that’s fine to try to keep going, he took it way too far. Whenever there was a cover he’d check the two partners before he went to make the count. That’s a waste of time and looks bad. Also during the match the champions kept fighting, eventually seeing Bulldog intentionally clothesline Owen hard.

Now once that happens it’s like a new match starts. The second match is far superior to the first one. Once they change gears, things get very good very fast. There was a ton of near falls and I actually believed that there would be new champions on more than one occasion. I knew who was going to win and I still believed otherwise. That my friends is compelling wrestling. The champions get hit with everything but they keep getting up every time.

Finally the end comes and it is just strange. Bulldog gets one of the guys up for the powerslam and Owen hits the guy in the head with a Slammy right in front of the referee for the DQ. What in the world? Why would you do that when your partner was about to hit his finisher which people didn’t kick out of? They fight even more afterwards with Smith throwing down the title and then even breaking the Slammy. He finally leaves with his partners.

Rating: B-. Just like in the opening match this was a tale of two matches and two separate grades. The first half was just flat out bad. It wasn’t interesting and I was wanting to just fast forward through the match and get to the end. However once Owen and Bulldog got done fighting the thing turned into a great tag match.

The ending just made no sense at all and was just to further the Bulldog/Owen angle which mostly ended with the debut of the European Title later on that month in which these two faced each other for the title.

Doc is with the Deadman in that back who says he has rediscovered his edge which makes me expect the Rated R Superstar to pop up.

WWF Title: Undertaker vs. Vader vs. Steve Austin vs. Bret Hart

Lawler keeps asking what lucha libre means (the Spanish announcers keep saying it) and JR says rough wrestling for some reason. This is actually an over the top rope battle royal but you can also be eliminated by pin or submission, which is a very interesting twist. I’m not sure if I like it or not. It takes away Vader’s weight advantage but why would you try to pin someone when you can just knock them out of the ring?

Bret of course gets a prematch interview. He says nothing can stop him from taking the title tonight. Bret’s jacket really is cool. JR says that even Wrestlemania wasn’t this exciting. Suuuuuure. Starts off with both singles feuds being renewed. Very quickly Vader and Taker figure out that going through the ropes is legal. Everyone just beats on everyone with them trading partners which further supports my orgy theory from earlier.

Leaving the ring was critical here I think as it opens up a lot of alternative possibilities for these guys which is certainly a good thing. Vader gets cut BAD around his left eye. Like it looks as if it fell out and there’s just a hole there that’s shooting blood out of it. I finally found where it was and it’s not pretty. Within a few seconds he takes a chair to the face and he hits his eye on the stairs, right on the corner.

They fight all over the arena and all fight each other at least once and in some cases twice. That’s what makes this match work as well as it is: you can keep the fighting fresh. Austin even breaks out a top rope clothesline which never stops making my head shake given how bad his knees got later in his career. After that we cut to the floor where VADER HAS BRET IN A SHARPSHOOTER. What the heck???

Those things happen within a few seconds of each other. Dang I need my medicine after seeing that. Sadly enough it was a better one that the one Rock would use later in his career. We’re at 12 minutes and no one is out yet. That’s another thing that’s making this great is all four are in there for over half of the match so far. It’s more or less Bret wrestling Austin and Taker fighting Vader now.

Bret sets Austin for a belly to back suplex and Austin BACKFLIPS out of it. DANG Austin was awesome before he got hurt. Vader’s eye is freaking sick right now. This whole thing is absolutely brutal and it’s a great match so far. We’re at fifteen minutes and it’s still all four guys in there. Just as I finish typing that Austin is thrown out as Bret Hart uses what we would now call the FU to eliminate him. Bret Hart used an FU. Sly can never see this moment.

His orgasm would flood Missouri. Taker gets knocked to the floor so we continue our orgy match with Bret and Vader getting it on for awhile. I will now pause to attempt to erase such a mental picture. Ok I’m back now as Vader goes to the top in a dumb move. Why would you do that when being knocked to the floor eliminates you?

Bret stops him and lands a superplex from the top rope which is freaking insane given A) how long they’ve been going and B) the fact that Vader’s fat needs its own zip code. Taker breaks up the sharpshooter on Vader which makes no sense at all and even the announcers question it. Austin comes back out and beats up Hart some more to pretty much secure the fact that he’ll be winning this.

Vader again goes to the ropes for a Vader Bomb but Taker sits up and hits an uppercut to the little Vaders to eliminate him so we’re down to Bret vs. Taker. Austin is still around after a chokeslam and for some reason he stops the tombstone. Taker and Hart both go for Austin but Taker is too slow.

He turns around and is clotheslined out to make Bret the champion again. Sid comes out for the staredown after Taker storms off. Sid says let’s do it right now as we go off the air in the middle of the showdown. I like that ending as it leaves us on a cliffhanger for tomorrow’s show.

Rating: A. This was a very fun match and the key to it was you knew there was going to be a new champion at the end so you had to watch all of it. Another key was that no one was eliminated until over half of the match was gone. This kept things fresh and made you want to stay until the very end to see how everyone went out. The leaving the ring was key as well as it allowed three separate one on one matches to occur throughout the match. Great match indeed and very fun.

Overall Rating: B-. First two matches were pretty bad but the other three more than made up for them. By the middle of the main event I was hooked. The second half of the show was great with another solid Rock/HHH encounter, a solid and surprising tag match and a great main event. Overall this show started slowly but kicked it into high gear at the end. Not great but certainly fun, this is worth a watch someday but don’t make it a top priority.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my 1998 Monday Night Raw Review ebook on Amazon at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 14, 2002
Location: American Airlines Center, Dallas, Texas
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

We’re six days away from the Rumble and the main story is of course HHH returning last week. The Rumble is already looking stacked with names like Austin, HHH, Angle and Undertaker already signed up for the match. Other than that….there’s not much else to talk about. That’s perfectly normal for this time of year in the WWF though so I can’t complain about it. Well alright so I will but you know the drill by now I’m sure. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Austin vs. Angle from Smackdown which ended with Kane interfering for no apparent reason and chokeslamming both guys. A few other guys came out and the mini Rumble before the Rumble went down with HHH standing tall.

Here’s Flair to open the show. He praises Dallas and talks about facing Kerry Von Erich in Texas Stadium back in 1984. Lately though, Vince has humbled Flair and we get a clip of the beating from last week. We also get a clip from Smackdown where Vince says that destroying lives turns him on. Flair yells at the cameraman for following him around and makes the match on Sunday a street fight. There are some elbows on the microphone for good sake but he wants to fight Vince now. Flair wants to fight Vince, but here’s Jericho instead.

Jericho talks about how the show used to revolve around Flair, but now this is his show. He says he’ll beat Rock for the fifth time and thinks Flair can’t do it anymore. Jericho brags about how awesome he is and says he’s the anti-Texan. Now Jericho goes onto a rant about how Flair and President George W. Bush are a lot alike but doesn’t say why. Jericho says Flair is going to choke on Sunday and the fight is on.

Flair hits a few low blows and puts the Undisputed Champion in the Figure Four, but Vince runs out with the lead pipe for the save. They didn’t even try to protect Jericho at this point. Vince slaps him in the head a bit because Flair has a concussion but a kick between Flair’s legs is blocked. Jericho decks Flair and this segment FINALLY ends after about twenty minutes. All that to announce that it’s a street fight, and yet people still wonder why they can’t get people on the show at times.

Lance Storm and Christian praise Jericho. Bradshaw comes in to yell at them, saying George Bush has given Jericho his freedom. Without making this a political argument, 1. Jericho is Canadian, 2. What freedom did Bush give him? 3. Why is Bradshaw talking to the world champion? Apparently a match is made.

Bubba Ray Dudley vs. Spike Dudley

The evil Bubba pounds Spike into the corner to start and works over the ribs, only to miss a Vader Bomb in the corner. D-Von trips Spike up but the bigger Dudleys collide. The Dudley Dog is countered and the Dudleys load up What’s Up with Stacy providing the distraction. Tazz breaks that up and it’s a victory roll for the pin for Spike. Nothing here but they built the title match on Sunday.

Stephanie arrives and is already complaining. HHH is with her and doesn’t seem to care at all.

Tajiri/Hurricane vs. Billy and Chuck

This was set up on Heat and Billy was so upset that he and Chuck had to cancel their date with two WAY hot chicks. Hurricane doesn’t buy it either and we get a WHATSUPWITHDAT. He says Billy and Chuck are more like the Human Torch: flame on. Billy and Hurricane start and Chuck almost immediately cheats. Chuck comes in legally now and stomps away in the corner as the beating continues. A clothesline puts Chuck down and there’s the not hot tag to Tajiri. Kicks are fired, we get heel miscommunication, Billy distracts Tajiri and the superkick from Chuck gets the pin. Another nothing match.

Undertaker arrives.

Scotty and Albert are at WWF New York.

Angle says he’ll break Kane’s ankle tonight. We get Shakira lyrics and Olympic references in there too.

Debra and Stephanie argue over whose husband is better. They’re about to fight but since that could send wrestling back a few hundred years, referees break it up. Is there ANYTHING of note in the first half of this show?

Jazz vs. Jacqueline

That’s a big negative on the previous question. The winner gets a title shot at Trish on Sunday. Jackie is the hometown girl so I think you can tell where this is going. Jazz dominates to start but misses a splash. That means absolutely nothing as Jackie gets caught in a fisherman’s buster for the pin and the shot. This was barely a minute.

Kurt Angle vs. Kane

Kane no sells some right hands to start and is punched out to the floor. More punching occurs on the floor but Angle hits a fast dropkick as we head back in. Kane sends him into the corner and fires off some shoulders as there’s a ton of smoke in the arena from Kane’s entrance. The elbow drop misses Kurt so Angle pounds away. A one armed side slam puts Angle down as the match continues to drag.

Kane loads up the top rope clothesline but Angle runs the corner for the suplex. We needed that as hopefully the match can pick up a bit now. A quick ankle lock attempt is broken up and the enziguri puts Angle down. Kane throws Angle into the corner and pounds away before going up top, where he blocks another suplex attempt. The top rope clothesline gets two but the chokeslam is countered into the ankle lock.

This goes on for a LONG time before Kane gets to the rope. An Angle Slam gets two and Kane sits up before grabbing Angle for the chokeslam. Angle grabs the referee, so Kane chokeslams both of them. Kane puts Angle in the ankle lock and Kurt taps, but there’s no referee. Back to the ankle lock but Angle backs up and rolls Kane up for the pin with a handful of ropes.

Rating: C-. This was just ok and the lack of selling of the ankle was really annoying. These two would face off at Wrestlemania again in a match that wasn’t all that good. Other than that, Angle looked good running up the corner for the suplex, but other than that there wasn’t much at all. At least it was long enough to rate.

Stephanie manipulates HHH to go after Austin.

Big Show comes in to see the APA when Booker comes in as well. Booker vomited on Smackdown so here are some jokes about that for good measure. Apparently we’re getting a six man with the APA/someone vs. the Canadians. Also it’s Booker vs. Big Show. Riveting stuff people.

Edge/Rob Van Dam vs. William Regal/Test

It’s a brawl to start as Test tries to sneak in through the crowd. Van Dam and Test start things off with the Canadian taking over. Off to Regal for some forearms and stomps to keep control. Back to Test to choke in the corner for a bit as the uninspired stuff continues tonight. We hit the chinlock on RVD for a bit before he fights up and hits the spin kick to take Test down. Off to Edge vs. Regal with the Hall of Famer cleaning house. Regal loads up the brass knuckles and lays out Van Dam. After a melee he lays out Edge as well for the upset pin.

Rating: D. That word uninspired continues to fit perfectly here. The problem above all else here is that there’s no reason for me to care about this match. Basically we needed two guys to throw in there for the sake of preventing Edge vs. Regal from happening from before Sunday. Just another dull match here.

The APA gets Rikishi to be their partner.

Big Show vs. Booker T

Booker jumps him to start but gets caught in a powerslam. There’s a HARD chop in the corner by the big man but Booker low bridges him out to the floor. Show blocks a shot into the post and whips Booker into it instead as we head back inside. Booker takes out the knee and hits the ax kick for two. Show comes back with some basic stuff but Booker gets a middle buckle off somewhere in there and Show misses a charge into it, giving Booker the cheap pin. Again, NOTHING of note here and very short.

Time for Austin to eat up a LOT of time as he says he and HHH disagree. He goes into a story (complete with acting out each bit) about going to a bar last night and drinking beer, playing pool and darts, riding a mechanical bull (complete with all the ways he rode it), started a bar fight, answered a bartender’s question and trained for the Royal Rumble by throwing everyone out of the bar. That’s not all he did, but I need to split up this paragraph.

Austin talked about how great HHH looks, listed off all of the exercises HHH has been doing to get back into shape, explained his strategy of getting a bigger beer belly because it makes it harder to throw him over (that’s hilarious!), lists off everything he ate at What-A-Burger (real place) and talks about all the parts of HHH’s head he can talk trash to, including both sides and the back. This was LONG but hilarious, including talking about the training methods.

We recap Vince and Flair from earlier.

Chris Jericho/Lance Storm/Christian vs. APA/Rikishi

Jericho and Rikishi start things off but the Samoan has to fight off Storm as well. The double teaming allows for Lance to take over with a superkick before it’s back to Chris. There’s a belly to belly suplex for two and it’s off to Bradshaw. Christian and Jericho stomp away at Bradshaw in the corner but Christian charges into a boot in the corner. The not hot tag brings in Faarooq as everything breaks down. A missile dropkick puts Bradshaw down and Faarooq hits the spinebuster on Jericho, but a distraction lets Jericho pop up for the Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) on Faarooq for the pin.

Rating: D. ANOTHER match barely long enough to rate here. Here’s the biggest problem with this match: why in the world is Rikishi in this match instead of Jericho’s opponent on Sunday, as in the Rock? That would make sense here, but that’s not going to happen on this show as we’ve seen so far. Another lame match here.

HHH tells Stephanie he’s going to the ring alone.

Here’s the Game to close out the show. He talks about what a thrill it was to return last week, but it’s not complete until he wins the Rumble on Sunday. As usual, it takes nearly five minutes to get to that point. HHH says he’ll fight anyone and here’s Austin. The Game blocks Austin from going to the buckle and the fight is on. Austin blocks a Pedigree but Taker comes in to blast them both with a chair and stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: D. Well let’s see: other than in ads for the show, I have no idea who Jericho is defending against on Sunday, I don’t want to see the Rumble, and they couldn’t make it any clearer that HHH is winning the Rumble if they put up a big sign about it. This year is not off to a good start and it’s going to get even worse in the coming months. Nothing good to see here.

Here’s the Royal Rumble if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2013/01/16/royal-rumble-count-up-2013-redo-2002-hes-back-and-theres-not-a-thing-we-can-do-about-it/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 13, 1997
Location: Memorial Auditorium, Lowell, Massachusetts
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is another special Raw show called Thursday Raw Thursday. This was another special request and my first one through e-mail actually. Anyway the idea here is that there’s either tennis or the stupid dog show on Monday so Raw is on Thursday this week. Don’t ask me why they say the day twice but it’s Vince so I think that explains it. This is famous for two reasons: Rock vs. HHH in a LONG match (for the time frame) and this is where Shawn lost his smile. Let’s get to it.

We open with a video on Shawn who is vacating the title, meaning that the winner of the Final Four this Sunday will be the new champion. The opening video is about Sid vs. Shawn which was supposed to be the rubber match tonight. Naturally they say Thursday Raw Thursday about a million times in between this.

Intercontinental Title: Rocky Maivia vs. HHH

HHH is champion here and Rocky is a glorified rookie. Also tonight there’s Sid vs. Austin and Bret vs. Vader. For no apparent reason Undertaker is fighting Savio. This is live it seems. It’s still Hunter Hearst Helmsley here so there’s no HHH name yet. The curtseying future Game gets a hip block to start us off and is very confident. They do some nice mat stuff which I’ve never seen before. They have some leg locks and head scissors with impressive counters. Cool stuff.

Off to a chinlock by HHH here but Rocky fights out and hits a dropkick to send him to the floor. A charge misses and Rocky hits the post. Back inside with HHH working on the arm. Rocky fights up but HHH gets a single arm DDT for two. Some chops hit in the corner as we take a break. Back with HHH still in control and just going OFF on Rocky’s head with right hands.

Honky Tonk Man comes out for some reason. He was looking for a protégé or something like that. He wound up picking Billy Gunn who became Rock-A-Billy as one of the dumbest gimmicks of all time. HHH has dominated the vast majority of this with a jumping knee to the head and then a sleeper. Rocky tries to reverse into a sleeper of his own but gets rammed into the buckle.

Rocky starts his comeback with right hands (called a chop by Vince for no apparent reason). Top rope cross body, more or less Rocky’s finisher, is rolled through by HHH for two. Facebuster sets up a neckbreaker by HHH for a close two. HHH is getting frustrated. Piledriver gets two AGAIN as Vince and Jim can’t believe it. Superplex gets two and no one knows what to think.

HHH sets for the Pedigree but Rocky can’t stand up long enough for it to go on. Rocky falls flat on his face and is more or less dead. Honky shouts ROLL HIM OVER! HHH finally tries to do just that and gets rolled up by Rocky for the pin and the title in perhaps the biggest upset of all time up to that point.

Rating: B-. This was good but it’s really just Rocky hanging in there until the end for the one small package to win the title. That being said, the resilience thing with HHH being all stuck up and not going for the kill when he could have makes this work more than it should. Also it’s Rock vs. HHH so it’s hard not to like it at least a little bit.

Rocky cuts his best Boy Scout promo after the match, saying he’ll make his fans and family proud.

Ad for Final Four which was a great main event.

Here’s Sunny, poured into a little white dress. Ah she’s ring announcer.

Headbangers vs. Bob Holly/Aldo Montoya

Montoya is more famous as Justin Credible. We see some clips of some WWF guys on a country music show. Road Dogg got to sing his song on there and Hillbilly Jim played some guitar. Also there was a “match” with the Godwinns vs. Jarrett/the host. Who thought this was a good idea for a match? Mosh vs. Holly to start us off. Holly doesn’t so much do things well as much as he doesn’t do things well.

In case you can’t get it, this is a terribly boring match. It’s not that it’s bad but there’s no point to having it and yet it’s here anyway. We’re talking about Shawn Michaels anyway which is far more interesting so that helps. I mean really, does anyone want to watch these four guys have a match? The announcers aren’t paying a bit of attention to this which I can’t blame them for at all.

The Headbangers hit a double Gordbuster on Holly as they take over. Yeah I don’t care about this match at all either. The idea is that Shawn might have to have reconstructive surgery. In reality the knee was slightly injured but he could have gone without the surgery but that would have meant losing the title at Mania which he just wasn’t going to do.

We might have talked about this match for 20 seconds combined of four and a half minutes. Thrasher misses a moonsault and it’s off to Montoya. We’re talking about Brett Favre now. I can’t escape this guy. Finally the Headbangers win with a powerbomb/leg drop combination. Sunny says Mosh and Thrash just won. Even she wasn’t paying attention.

Rating: D. The match was ok I guess but at the same time this was one of those times where no one cared in the slightest and everyone knew it. WWF in 97 was just bad at some points and this is one of them. Who in the world thought this was something people would want to see? Bad match, but now let’s get to something that matters.

Vince introduces Gorilla Monsoon who is going to accept the WWF Title from Shawn Michaels. Shawn limps out and is very sad. Here’s the basic idea: Shawn was supposed to return the favor to Bret and lose the title to him at Mania 13. However Shawn didn’t really want to do that and “hurt his knee” and couldn’t do it. He claimed the doctors said it could be career ending when it was really minor. In short, Shawn didn’t want to lose so he forfeited the title and was back in the ring by May. This is the famous Lost My Smile speech and not a lot of the guys in the back bought it to put it mildly.

Shawn gets all teary eyed and talks about his body being beaten up and all that jazz. HUGE We Want Sid, the guy that might have been winning the title that night depending on who you ask. No one has had to endure the schedule that Shawn had over the years etc. This is rather sickening knowing what’s actually going on here. Do I think he was hurt? Yeah he was somewhat hurt but at the end of the day he was looking out for himself here far more than anyone else when Shawn as a heel could have worked very well but he was afraid of doing it.

He talks about how he’s not going to be around the title for a long time. The doctors aren’t sure where his knee is and he may be beyond reconstructive surgery at this point. Shawn talks about riding in leer jets and limousines as I have a feeling like I’ve heard this before. You also have to remember that the WWF was in real trouble at this point and had it not been for Austin they would have been dead. He hands the belt to Monsoon and says he’s going back home. Shawn says that somewhere along the line he lost his smile. Oh dear.

Overall my thought on this is Shawn knew what was really going on and he put his ego over the fans, the company, the title and the rest of his roster. He had no problem taking all the benefits of being champion but didn’t want to do the harder parts of it (like losing) and that to me isn’t right. The fans were mixed to put it mildly on this. This would have been fine at its time, but given that he would be back before the summer kills any sympathy this would have had.

Savio Vega vs. Undertaker

Savio turned heel recently and joined the Nation. Taker was feuding with them for lack of anything better to do. He would win the title at Mania so it seems like he got noticed. After a break we’re back with Taker destroying him. The announcers talk about Bret vs. Vader but it’s not as bad as it was in the tag match. Why in the world am I watching Savio Vega vs. the Undertaker? Who thought this was a good idea?

Taker hits a big boot and stumbles back from it. Leg drop gets two on Savio. Not yet Old School hits as this is one sided for the most part. There are still tickets available for the PPV in Chattanooga. Savio gets a low blow and a set of clotheslines to get two. The other members of the Nation interfere a bit as we’re waiting for Taker to end Savio.

The fans chant rest in peace. My goodness how nice does it sound to be able to take a nap and let someone else do this? Or just to not watch this at all? Savio gets a spinwheel kick to put Taker down for two. Since that’s his finisher the rest of the match is pretty predictable. Taker is finally bored with all this and hits a chokeslam to end it.

Rating: D-. Oh dang it all this was boring. Nothing at all was going on here and it never got interesting. It’s nearly NINE MINUTES LONG. Why in the world did this need nearly ten minutes? It’s Undertaker vs. Savio Vega for crying out loud. Boring match and one of the least interesting things I’ve seen in a good while.

Nation attacks, Ahmed saves, Nation lackeys are hurt.

Psycho Sid vs. Steve Austin

After Austin’s entrance, Gorilla says that the four guys have a golden opportunity on Sunday. Sid will get his title shot and will get it against the winner of the Final Four match this coming Monday. Sid would face Bret and win the title. Sid was mad over to say the least. Austin jumps Sid to start and the fight was on. Jerry picks Austin to win the title on Sunday.

Austin kicks Sid low and does Sid’s taunts as this is a total battle from the bell. Fans are TOTALLY behind Austin which is saying a lot considering how over Sid was at this point. Austin sends him into the post and takes him down in the ring with an elbow. This is pre-neck injury for Austin so he’s a completely different guy than the brawler he would become. Abdominal stretch by Austin but Sid gets a sleeper. And never mind as Austin suplexes him almost immediately.

Off to a front facelock so they can call some spots. JR says it’ll be Austin as well on Sunday while Vince says it’ll be Sid. You know, the guy that isn’t in the match Sunday? Sid hammers him down and misses a legdrop so Austin tries a failed Sharpshooter. Big boot takes Austin down and then Bret comes out to fight Austin and it’s a DQ win for Stone Cold.

Rating: C+. This was a brawl with the fans telling you a lot about what they wanted. You had a crazy dude in Sid and Austin being the anti-authority figure that everyone wanted to see. Thankfully Vince listened and everything turned out well in the end. This was a fun brawl and that’s all it needed to be.

Bret and Sid fight while Austin laughs.

Vader stumbles through an interview where he says he’s beaten everyone in the Final Four match recently.

Lawler talks about sending his mom money for Valentine’s Day. This is being written on the night Lawler faced Miz for the WWE Title at the Elimination Chamber where Lawler was talking about his mother passing away the previous week so that’s kind of sad to hear.

We replay part of the Shawn speech about losing his smile. Did you check under that copy of “How to Fake a Knee Injury?” When Vince hugs Shawn you can see him thinking “You bastard!!!”

Tag Titles: Farooq/Crush vs. British Bulldog/Owen Hart

Bulldog and Hart had the titles forever in one of the longest title reigns in history. No one since has had a longer WWF/E tag title reign that I can remember. That doesn’t count the Smackdown tag titles made in 2002 mind you. Owen vs. Crush to start and the Canadian gets a cross body for two. Over to Bulldog as Crush throws Owen around a bit.

We take a break just after Farooq tags in. Vince says that if anything significant happens while we’re gone it’ll be shown. Nothing is shown so that means nothing of note is happening during a title match. That sounds like blasphemy to Vince to me. Owen and Bulldog had been having issues lately and they do here as well, resulting in Bulldog being in trouble.

Bret is watching the match and says that what Shawn said was sad. We got split screen to do this of course so we can barely see the match. Bulldog is getting beaten down here if you’re curious. Bret says that there’s no way around Vader so Bret will have to do something different than he did last time when he lost. It’s Hitman Time, not Vader Time.

Ah hey it’s the full match rather than the split one. Owen starts a Bulldog chant even though the Bulldog is getting crushed out there. Hey that was funny and wasn’t even supposed to be! I kill myself sometimes. Crush gets a bodyscissors. Vince: “Speaking of body scissors, how would you like to be bodyscissored by La Femme Nikita, coming up next on USA!” That man is a natural salesman if there has ever been one.

The fans chant what sounds like Bulldog/Owen but it’s not really clear. Maybe if it was in a town bigger than Lowell, Massachusetts that would go a bit better. Bulldog reverses a bearhug with a belly to belly but can’t get a tag. Owen gets tagged but it’s not seen in a classic tag team move. Smith finally gets an enziguri to bring in Owen who cleans house. Missile dropkick to Crush gets two and it all breaks down. We hit the floor and Owen might have injured his knee. Injured or HBK-ified, it’s good enough for the count out to end this.

Rating: D+. I just wasn’t feeling this one at all. The idea was to plug the whole fighting amongst themselves champions and while that happened this felt rushed and a big forced. Not a terrible match but it just kind of came and went. The knee injury never went anywhere that I can remember.

The Nation beats down Bulldog post match while Owen tries to fix his knee. Bulldog helps him out but Owen limps back to get the belts. That’s nice subtle heel stuff.

Vader vs. Bret Hart

Main event time here. Before we get started though Taker comes out to watch. Oh and he’s got a loud mic. He hates to interrupt but Taker gets no respect anymore. This is a very un-Deadman like promo. He’s talking fast and sounds more like Biker Taker than Deadman Taker. Vader jumps Bret as Taker leaves and Hart is in trouble early on as we take a break.

Apparently just after they went to a break Austin came out and stomped on Bret some before being sent to the back. Vader goes up and Bret catches him in a POWERSLAM??? WHAT THE HECK??? Bret pounds away and gets a terrible looking Russian Leg Sweep for two. It might have helped if he actually, you know, swept the leg? BRET SLAMS VADER!!!! WHAT IN THE WORLD AM I WATCHING????? He picked him up like he was a cruiserweight and just turned him over for a slam like it was nothing. WHAT THE HECK?????

Bret can’t get the Sharpshooter. Well I guess he was in Power Bret mode or something. Dude Bret Hart slammed Vader. I can’t get over that. Why not a belly to back suplex too? Bret is throwing Vader around like he weighs 180. Bret low bridges Vader and there’s the Sharpshooter but Vader grabs a rope. Austin pops up in the balcony to yell at Bret and Vader drills the Canadian from behind. Vadersault misses and Bret gets the easy pin to end the show.

Rating: D+. Not bad but it was ok I guess. I really can’t get over that slam. Bret Hart just picked Vader up like he was picking up a Slurpie. This was just a match to set up the PPV for the most part with nothing special going on at all. Austin’s interference felt rushed as did Taker’s at the beginning. Either way the match at the PPV was great.

Overall Rating: C-. Well there’s certainly a lot of history here but the delivery isn’t that great. Shawn’s speech doesn’t really mean a lot anymore as he more or less just took a vacation. This wasn’t that bad though and considering the card had to be shuffled earlier in the week as did the PPV, this was pretty solid. Not great, but good enough for what it was.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

The year of 2001 is gone and we’re now into the year that might be even worse in 2002. At this point we’re getting close to the Brand Split that has dominated the company since it first started. On the Raw side, the year would be dominated by some surprising champions in the form of Undertaker and Hulk Hogan, but by the end of the ear we’ll be getting a DX reunion and a big feud over the newly created World Heavyweight Championship. This is the first full year when WWF had no competition so let’s get to it.

Monday Night Raw
Date: January 7, 2002
Location: Madison Square Garden, New York City, New York
Attendance: 13,978
Commentators: Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross

It’s the night of the loudest pop I’ve ever heard in wrestling as HHH is back from eight months of recovery from quadriceps surgery. To say there’s nothing else going on tonight is an understatement, but that’s going to be the case for a lot of these shows in the future. We’re coming up on the Rumble and if you can’t guess who is winning that, I can’t help you. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is set to Beautiful Day as HHH is back tonight.

Tonight we have a tag team contest “for the ages.” It’s Booker T/Big Boss Man vs. Rock/Austin. If those are the ages, then the ages are lost.

Here’s Vince to open things up with a blue box. This is during the time where he and Flair co-owned the company and Vince isn’t happy. We get a montage of Flair’s triumphs of the 80s and 90s, which would be much better if it wasn’t set to Cocky by Kid Rock. We also get a clip of Flair announcing himself as the new co-owner of the WWF. Then Flair challenged Vince to a match at the Rumble and punched Vince out at the same time. Vince goes to the box and pulls out….a Flair wig and robe. He does a Flair strut which finally brings out Naitch. Stupid sign of the night in the crowd: “Rick Flair is God.”

Flair talks all slow and respectful before going into a classic rant, talking about how McMahon will NEVER do this again no matter what. He says he’s Ric Flair and Vince is not so take the wig off RIGHT NOW. As Vince takes the robe off though, he blasts Flair in the head with a hidden pipe. Flair gets posted and stomped on for a bit as well.

Test vs. Rob Van Dam

The idea here is that Test can do whatever he wants because he has immunity from a battle royal win at Survivor Series. Test pounds away to start but Van Dam comes back with a spinwheel kick to take over. Another spin kick is caught in a kind of powerbomb and the Canadian pounds away on the head. A clothesline in the corner gets two and it’s off to the chinlock already. Rob fights up and escapes a suplex before kicking Test’s leg out.

Van Dam kicks Test down but Test kicks the referee into the ropes for the crotch. The referee and Test get in a shoving match which gives Van Dam two. Test misses the big boot so Van Dam kicks him to the floor where Test grabs a chair. The referee is shoved down again and it’s the Van Daminator to set up the Five Star for the pin.

Rating: D+. This was just ok for the most part. The Test storyline didn’t really go anywhere as at the end of the day, he’s just Test. He was a whiny guy that never did anything of note after the year 2000, so why should anyone care that he’s shoving referees around? Nothing to see here.

Angle is annoyed at HHH getting all the attention when he isn’t even here. He has a big announcement of his own, but he’ll save it for later.

Trish and Terri argue at WWF New York, resulting in a wet t-shirt contest later tonight. This was back when Trish was a blonde head of hair and a big rack and nothing more.

Billy and Chuck vs. Scotty 2 Hotty/Albert

Billy and Chuck aren’t entirely gay yet, but Billy does suggest that they should be in the wet t-shirt contest rather than the girls. Billy and Albert get things going and it’s Albert taking over on both of the guys in red. We get the COMEDY spot of Billy being sent into the corner and falling face first into Chuck’s crotch because that’s funny right? Scotty comes in with a neckbreaker for two on Chuck but Billy blasts him in the back to take over. The heels take over for a bit, but Scotty comes back with a DDT on Chuck to put both guys down.

There’s the hot tag to Albert as the fans are nearly comatose. A powerslam gets two on Chuck and there’s a splash in the corner to Billy. Chuck hits Billy by mistake and Scotty loads up the Worm. After a dancing accompaniment by Albert, the Worm gets two but Billy breaks it up. Chuck superkicks Albert down and the Fameasser is enough to pin Scotty.

Rating: D. This would be your second straight lame match that doesn’t accomplish anything and is really here just to fill in some time. I’d almost think that they were intentionally having a boring show so that HHH’s return looks all the more awesome, but they would NEVER do something like that right?

Jericho demands more respect and doesn’t want to face Rikishi, even in a non-title match. Oh and he sucks up to Vince for a bit.

Michael Cole is in a yellow shirt and is WAY too excited. Austin comes up and gives him the still fresh WHAT treatment. Austin says he saw HHH here in the back and he isn’t sure what to think of it. He knows what it’s like to come back from a nearly career ending injury. That being said, he didn’t want to say hi to HHH.

Tonight he’s here to enter the Royal Rumble, which is the match where you take a man and throw him over the top, then you take another (WHAT), then another (WHAT), repeat I kid you not 28 times. He actually said it that many times. Also tonight Austin is teaming up with the Rock, which prompts a bunch of WHAT’s. Austin is really into this at the moment and it’s working really well.

Lawler has a watergun and gets to emcee the t-shirt contest.

Intercontinental Title: Edge vs. Lance Storm

Edge is defending. Storm immediately jumps Edge and clotheslines him in the corner. They trade some fast rollups and Storm hooks the Canadian Maple Leaf (half crab). That goes nowhere so Edge elbows him in the face a few times and hits the Impaler to retain. This was barely a minute long.

William Regal jumps Edge as he leaves and it’s the Power of the Punch for the champion.

Buy the WWF Magazine to read EVEN MORE about HHH.

Angle complains to European Champion Christian about HHH returning. It was Angle that saved the company at Survivor Series and it’s Angle that brings happiness and joy to children every day. They make fun of Beautiful Day for a bit too before Angle gets in this gem: “I tore my quadricep this morning and I’m here tonight!” When Angle is on, he’s WAY on and he certainly was here.

Steve Austin/The Rock vs. Big Bossman/Booker T

Booker and Boss Man are Vince’s cronies and they’re fighting the heroes. It’s a big brawl to start of course with Rock vs. Booker on the floor and a Thesz Press to Boss Man back inside. They switch partners and it’s Austin vs. Booker to start things off. A hot shot puts Booker down as Boss Man is rammed into the table a few times. Austin throws Booker to the floor so Rock throws Boss Man inside.

It’s time to stomp a mudhole as the Super Best Friends are completely dominant so far. Another clothesline puts Boss Man down and it’s off to Rock. The big jumping clothesline gets two for Rocky but Boss Man hits a kind of running clothesline in the corner to take over. Off to Rock who gets his face slammed into the mat, only to come back and send Rock to the floor. Back in and Booker stomps away but Rock pops up for a quick slugout.

A spinebuster puts Booker down but Boss Man breaks up the People’s Elbow. There’s the Book End but Austin comes in to break up something that hadn’t started yet. Boss Man comes in to fire off a knee to Rock’s chest and Booker adds a superkick for two. Austin comes in to break things up again and this time it’s enough for the hot tag to the Rattlesnake. Boss Man seems to have issues with any spot where he has to be lifted into the air. Everything breaks down for a third time and the Stunner pins Boss Man.

Rating: D+. Tag match for the ages? This? This was two legends beating up a big name and a guy who was over the hill nine years before this. It was clear that Austin was losing steam at this point as there was no fire in him here at all. He wasn’t terrible looking or anything, but at the end of the day he’s beating up Big Boss Man. Can you blame him for bailing in a few months?

Beer is consumed.

Apparently Rikishi gave Test a Stinkface recently.

Rikishi vs. Chris Jericho

Non-title here. Rikishi shoves him around to start and loads up a quick Stinkface, only to have referee Nick Patrick block it for no apparent reason. We head to the floor where Jericho rips the padding off the barricade and whips the fat man into it to take over. Back inside we go and Jericho gets two off a missile dropkick. The Lionsault misses though and the fat man starts his comeback.

A kind of Alabama Slam puts Jericho down and there’s a Samoan Drop for no cover. Rikishi loads up the Banzai Drop but Patrick blocks it again. After shoving him away, Rikishi misses the Banzai and Jericho heads to the floor. He grabs one of the belts but the swing misses and Rikishi superkicks Jericho into Patrick. A Stinkface only hits the referee and it’s a belt shot to Rikishi’s non-stereotyped head for the pin.

Rating: D. Did we really need a crooked referee, a belt shot and a cheating win for Chris Jericho to beat Rikishi in less than four and a half minutes? The match was dull and mainly there for the chance of Rikishi hitting a Stinkface, which isn’t really all that interesting at the end of the day. Another nothing match.

Big Show, Torrie and Tajiri have an awkward moment talking about HHH until Angle comes in and accuses them of acting like teenagers at a Ricky Martin concert. Tajiri does a Martin impression. Next.

We recap the Vince/Flair thing earlier.

The Dudleys get in a confrontation with Tazz and Spike, who they defend against in a bit. Wouldn’t this be better suited for more than five minutes before the match?

Tag Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Spike Dudley/Tazz

This is hardcore for no apparent reason and Stacy is with the Dudleys. It’s a brawl to start with Spike being sent into the steps. Bubba sprays him with a fire extinguisher as the fans want tables. Spike tries a sunset flip on Bubba, only to get blasted with the extinguisher again. A HARD trashcan lid to the face puts Tazz down and What’s Up Tazz? Bubba wants tables but whispers it because he’s evil right now.

Tazz is almost put through but Spike makes the save with a stop sign. There’s a Tazmission to D-Von but Tazz has to let it go to move a table. Stacy flashes Tazz to distract him but Bubba gets the view instead, allowing for a suplex onto a table. Spike puts him through the table with a Dudley Dog for the upset and the titles.

Rating: D+. The match was fast paced but not all that great. The problem here was that at the end of the day, does anyone buy Spike and Tazz as a long term championship team? It was clear that they were transitional champions, which is ok, but it doesn’t do much overall. The live crowd loved this though and there was a match before this to set it up, so it was far better than some other angles I’ve seen that tried to do the same thing.

Undertaker says he’s winning the Rumble, and wishes HHH bad luck.

It’s time for the wet t-shirt contest now. Terri goes first and Jerry freaks out as you can see through her shirt. Trish leans against the ropes to get wetted down, but Jazz runs in to beat her down and end the contest. This was about what you would expect from it.

Here’s the reason this show exists: HHH makes his return to the absolutely loudest pop I have ever heard in MSG and likely the loudest I’ve ever heard anywhere. I mean the place EXPLODES. He poses for a good long while as the fans will not stop cheering. That’s very awesome when you think about it. HHH says he’s the Game and he’s back to another huge reaction. He officially enters the Rumble and here’s Angle to break it up. Kurt says that he too will be in the Rumble which is the big announcement he’s been talking about all night. The brawl is on and HHH of course gets the better of it, hitting a Pedigree to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. This show isn’t bad but it’s clear that all they’ve got to hope for at this point is HHH. His return was awesome, but they’re not going to have an MSG crowd to bail them out of a weak show week after week. Next week is the go home show for the Rumble though so we’ve got a lot of changes coming up which would be changed even more in a few months. Not a terrible show but it’s nothing worth seeing other than the end.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews

Saturday Night’s Main Event 30
Date: February 8, 1992
Location: Lubbock Municipal Coliseum, Lubbock, Texas
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Bobby Heenan

We’re on FOX now so the show is about as dead as you could ask for. This is the followup to the 92 Rumble where Flair won the world title and Hogan actually teased a heel attitude at the end and got booed almost out of the building for it. This was a good time for the company as you had Flair, Hogan, Savage, Undertaker and Roberts crossing paths to an extent and the results rocked. Let’s get to it.

Intercontinental Title: Mountie vs. Roddy Piper

This is the rematch from the Rumble where Mountie was given the title for two days since Bret was hurt. Piper wouldn’t win another WWF title for about 15 years. He’s staggering around a bit so he might be a bit intoxicated. Piper is wrestling with a t-shirt on. Keep that in mind for a bit later. Apparently the winner gets Bret at Mania.

An interview with Bret says he hopes it’s Piper but is happy either way. Piper changes control when he gets his knees up to block a splash. The referee gets bumped and Mountie pours water on Piper and gives him the shock stick that he was using. Naturally it has no effect and Mountie gets it, complete with ridiculous sound effects. Piper pulls off his shirt to reveal a vest saying Shock Proof in a rather infamous moment for some reason.

Rating: C. It was about the ending and to give Mountie his rematch. It worked fine so I can’t complain. There’s not much here but since the ending was effective I’m all fine and good with it.

We get a replay of the ending of the end of the Rumble with Sid getting robbed by Hogan and Gorilla having no issue with it of course. Heenan’s near orgasm is great. We see the Mania 8 “Press Conference” with Hogan being named the #1 contender for ZERO reason. I mean seriously, he came in third and got dumped fairly. What sense does that make even in kayfabe? Sid turns heel more or less in an interview there.

Sid Justice/Hulk Hogan vs. Ric Flair/Undertaker

The “faces” say that they’re united. Can you see it coming? If not you’re an idiot. Hogan comes out with Brutus Beefcake instead of his partner which makes him look even more heelish. Sid and Flair start us off. We get Hogan vs. Flair and since this isn’t WCW, Flair has a chance. Hogan is of course dominating because he has to by some law.

There have been about 5 tags inside of two minutes. The idea here is Hogan is trying to do everything and Sid is getting annoyed with it. He’s jumped in twice now already. The big guys are in there now. We’ve had all four in there more often than we’ve had just two. Hogan does the four sides ear thing and Sid isn’t happy as we go to commercial. Back with Taker beating up Sid.

Sid manages to fight the heels off and get the….hot I guess tag to Hogan. Flair shows intelligence by going for the knee. You can’t question Flair’s psychology 90% of the time. Figure Four is on and it’s called a submission hold. The name is never used which is odd. Sid won’t make a tag. Taker gets a SWEET leaping clothesline to take down Hogan.

Sid gets booed and of course Vince sucks on Hogan a bit for old time’s sake. They edit out a whole line about the WWF Champion (this was aired on 24/7) and Sid drops to the floor instead of tagging and walks out. There goes the referee for the DQ and Brutus gets in. This was around the time when his face had been messed up. Hogan makes the save.

Rating: B-. It was a main event tag match and was all about the angle. That’s all well and good and it came off fine. The Hogan vs. Sid match would of course happen at Mania in what was potentially Hogan’s last match. That’s just amusing.

Sid says he rules the world, completely turning heel.

After a commercial Hogan questions Sid’s morals and says he’s not a good person. That’s just amusing.

Sgt. Slaughter/Jim Duggan vs. Beverly Brothers

Anyone think this might be a squash? They’re a new team here and it’s an attempt to make Sarge a face again that loved America. The announcers argue over the logic of giving Hogan Flair at Mania and Heenan keeps picking Vince’s arguments apart. This doesn’t even last three minutes and of course the proud Americans win.

Rating: N/A. This was quick and nothing of note. Yep that’s about it.

We recap Savage vs. Roberts from the past few months, which more importantly about Roberts being heel of the millennium by punching Liz. Roberts says he’ll do it again.

Jake Roberts vs. Randy Savage

Savage says a lot of things in a big rant that must have been fueled by cocaine if I know anything about wrestling. Naturally this is a big freaking brawl in every sense of the words. They fight all over the ringside area with both guys beating on each other for a few minutes each. Savage takes a DDT but Jake lets him get up. The second doesn’t connect though and Savage goes airborne.

And there’s the big elbow to end it in like 5 minutes. Ok then. Savage beats him up ever more until the suits come down to break it up. Liz runs out for the big celebration. We see Jake waiting behind the curtain as the show ends. Later we would find out that he was going to hit Liz with a chair but Taker turned face and grabbed it away instead.

Rating: C+. This was too fast to really get much out of. It’s ok but nothing special at all. These two never got the big match that they needed and I think it hurt the feud in the end. Not terrible at all but far from great.

Overall Rating: C-. Total storybuilding show here as nothing is really settled in the ring, although that’s true for just about every SNME. There are some well known moments here so it’s worth a look I guess and at 45 minutes factoring out commercials it’s not like it’s going to take forever to watch. Check it out, why not.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up  my ebook of 1998 Monday Night Raw Reviews on Amazon at:

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 8, 1997
Location: Civic Center, Portland, Maine
Attendance: 6,510
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jerry Lawler, Kevin Kelly, Michael Cole

This is another request for reasons that I don’t remember. It’s the night after DX In Your House which means that Austin retained the IC Title and Shawn kept the WWF Title from Shamrock. It also means that Owen Hart ran in to attack Shawn after the match was over, revealing that he was still around after the Montreal Screwjob. I have no idea what to expect here. Let’s get to it.

We open with a stills package from last night of Austin vs. Rock. No mention of the world title match yet.

Here’s Vince to open things up. He talks about how Austin has been getting away with murder lately and that can’t keep going. Austin has been hitting WWF officials like announcers and referees which he did again last night. The big Austin chant is already beginning. Before there could be a DQ though, another referee came in and counted the pin on Austin to retain the title. Vince makes Austin vs. Rock tonight and cue the Rattlesnake.

Austin gets right in Vince’s face and says that he doesn’t care about the officials that are surrounding the ring. He doesn’t feel like defending the title but if he doesn’t, there will be consequences. Vince gets in Austin’s face and Austin is all like bring it on boy. Austin talks about defending the title already last night and doesn’t think he needs to do it again tonight. Someone is getting a beating tonight and Austin isn’t sure who it’s going to be yet.

Time to plug a sponsor! It’s Karate Fighters in this case which is kind of a Rock Em Sock Em Robots knockoff. Lawler beats Sunny to win a tournament but gets caught cheating, giving the chick the title.

We recap the not interesting stuff last night with the Outlaws, the Godwinns and the LOD.

Legion of Doom vs. Godwinns

The tag champion Outlaws (not yet named) are here with the Godwinns for no apparent reason. It’s a big brawl to start until we get down to Animal vs. Henry. They slug it out so here’s Hawk for some elbows. Animal comes back in with another elbow of his own before it’s off to Hawk vs. Phineas for some slow punching. Hawk hits his one wrestling move, the neckbreaker, only to miss his flying clothesline….and there go the lights. Cue Kane as the match is thrown out somewhere in there. Too short to rate but it was nothing to see at all.

Animal and the Godwinns brawl away as Kane is left alone with Hawk. A regular piledriver (huh?) is no sold by Hawk so there’s a chokeslam and tombstone to put him down. Kane leaves so the Outlaws come out for an attempted beatdown, only for Animal to make the save with a chair.

Post break the Outlaws sing a goodbye song to the “OLD”. Road Dogg issues an open challenge for anyone to face Billy, so here’s what we get.

Billy Gunn vs. Dude Love

The brawl starts on the floor and Roadie jumps in on commentary. Dude gets knocked into the announce table and Dogg gets to crack some jokes. Love comes back with right hands in the ring and a backslide for two, only to get taken down by a clothesline from Billy. Gunn misses a splash in the corner and Dude pounds away before sending Billy face first into the buckle a few times. Sweet Shin Music misses but a second attempt works a bit better, followed by the double arm DDT for the pin on Billy.

Rating: C-. For a four minute TV match between a comedy jobber and Mick Foley in his comedic persona, this was pretty decent stuff. The Outlaws would move on to feuding with Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie (Terry Funk) before joining DX. In other words, we have a match that actually accomplishes something in the WWF.

Post match Billy hits a guillotine legdrop onto Dude’s face with a belt in between.

JR teaches Taka Michinoku, who won the first Light Heavyweight Title last night, some English.

Here’s Jim Cornette with Taka, but Lawler interrupts Cornette before the first challenger can be announced. Lawler says that Taka stole the title from Brian Christopher and we get some anti-Japanese jokes. The first challenger is El Unico, which is clearly Brian Christopher under a mask. Lawler and Unico stomp down Taka and there goes the mask to shock no one.

We get a history of Shawn destroying the Hart Family over the last few months.

Kurrgan vs. Flash Funk

Jackyl is on commentary here and he talks about how tonight is the start of a revolution. This is the same kind of monster dominance that you would expect. Kurrgan pounds Funk down, Funk gets in a few shots, the Claw ends Funk quickly.

Post match Kurrgan won’t let go of the hold and the referee reverses the decision. The other members of the Truth Commission can’t get Kurrgan off Flash either.

Some stills explain the world title match last night.

Shamrock was mad last night.

Hour #2 begins.

Here’s DX to open the second half of the show. Remember at this point it’s just Shawn, HHH and Chyna. HHH talks about how last night Sgt. Slaughter thought he could chop down a guy like HHH but that just wasn’t going to happen. There’s a card table set up in the ring. Shawn talks about schooling Shamrock last night before shifting over to the Hart Family, who he refers to bodily waste. As many times as you try to flush it, a tiny piece keeps coming back up. Owen Hart is that small piece and Shawn is tired of having him around.

Shawn wants Owen to come out here, so DX is going to sit down and play a little game of strip poker until Owen Hart comes out here. He guarantees full nudity tonight no matter how long the game takes. They sit down for the game as DOA is riding to the ring for their match. This should be interesting, but it’s DOA so that isn’t likely.

Disciples of Apocalypse vs. Los Boricuas

The poker game has moved to the floor after a break. This is Skull/8-Ball vs. Perez/Estrada here I believe. Shawn has lost his shirt already. The Puerto Ricans are destroyed for awhile until they start double teaming to take I think Skull down. Skull takes Perez down but there’s no referee to count. The card game is still going on at ringside while the match is going on. Estrada beats on Skull as Shawn loses his shoes and socks. Skull hits a swinging neckbreaker to put Estrada down and it’s a double tag. Everything breaks down and Savio hits Skull in the back with a board for the pin.

Rating: F. This was so boring and I have no idea why these teams fought so many times. They feuded for the better part of a year and the bikers almost never won a single thing. The match wasn’t any good and the wrestlers in it were nothing interesting either. That sums up a good bit of 1997 on Raw actually.

The poker game has moved back to the ring and Chyna still hasn’t lost anything. There go Shawn’s pants and here come the Headbangers. DX destroys them on principle and Shawn brags a lot, but here’s Owen for the run in and run away.

Buy the PPV replay!

Jeff Jarrett vs. Vader

This is Jeff Jarrett to debut in the ring tonight after jumping back from WCW. Before the match starts though, here’s the Artist Formerly Known as Goldust to flash Vader. The chase is on and we have no match. Scratch that as Jeff wins by countout. Ok then.

Salvatore Sincere vs. Marc Mero

Mero almost got knocked out in a toughman contest fight last night by Butterbean but wound up hitting him with a stool for a DQ. Before the match, Mero calls Sincere a jobber with a stupid gimmick (JR: “Yeah and you’re a Badd Badd Man) and brings out his property, Sable. She’s in a potato sack but takes it off to reveal a barely there swimsuit. Sincere dropkicks him to the floor and I guess it’s another countout.

Here’s the Nation for the IC Title match tonight. Austin comes out in jeans because he still hasn’t said he’ll defend the title. Vince yells at him and threatens to strip Austin of the belt, but Austin says that’s cool because he wants the world title. He isn’t being stripped, but rather forfeiting the belt. Rock is officially the champion but there’s a Stunner for him to end the show. Austin tells Vince he’s coming for the title and there’s nothing Vince can do about it.

Overall Rating: C-. This wasn’t about wrestling but DANG was it fun. Austin is clearly way too big for the Intercontinental Title at this point and he’s more than ready to fight for the world title. Perhaps he could get there by say….winning the Royal Rumble? That’s coming up in a few weeks so why not? Oddly enough no Undertaker tonight but I think he’s gone due to Kane. Fun but not good show this week.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and check out my ebook of 1998 Monday Night Raw reviews at: