Royal Rumble 1989
Date: January 15, 1989
Location: The Summit, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 19,000
Commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse Ventura

This is the first PPV version of the show and things have changed a lot. Tonight, everyone is in the match and they’re focusing more on the idea of every man being for himself. The match wouldn’t be worth anything for a few more years but things should be a little bit stronger tonight as they have a better idea what they’re doing. Let’s get to it.

We start off with a listing of presumably everyone in the Rumble tonight. If not then it’s at least most of them.

Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus vs. Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation

2/3 falls here. Anvil vs. Bravo gets things going and they collide a few times with no one going anywhere. Both guys miss elbows and it’s off to Duggan for a BIG reaction. Ray Rougeau comes in and is immediately slammed down and hit by a knee drop. Hart comes in to a small but audible reaction and gets two each off a small package and a sunset flip. Jacques comes in and things break down a bit with all three heels being caught in one corner where Anvil drives shoulders into them, crushing Ray against the corner under two other guys.

Ray FINALLY gets something in by low bridging Bret to send him to the floor. At the end of the day, when you need someone to sell something you call on Bret. Dino’s side suplex puts Bret down and The Rougeau Bomb gets the first fall. Bret and Ray start things off in the second fall with Hart in big trouble. Jacques comes in and sends Bret into the corner for the traditional chest first bump in the corner which gives Dino two.

Bravo puts on a bear hug for a bit before it’s back to Jacques. A sunset flip gives Bret a quick breather but he’s immediately put in a camel clutch. Anvil makes the save but as he’s being put back in the corner, Ray comes in and puts the same hold back on. That’s good stuff there. The heels take turns working over Bret until Jacques puts on a Boston Crab. Gorilla wants Duggan or Neidhart to come in and break the hold up, because you’ve got five seconds. I love the hypocrisy you would get from him at times.

Bret breaks the hold and tags in Anvil but the referee didn’t see it. That’s such a basic spot but you don’t see it much anymore. Ray puts on an abdominal stretch before it’s off to Jacques for the exact same hold. Bret FINALLY hits an atomic drop to break up the momentum and there’s the white hot tag to Duggan. Anvil hits a slingshot shoulder on Ray and a Duggan elbow drop ties the match up at a fall apiece.

Duggan pounds on Ray to start before going to the wrong corner to try to beat up both guys. Bravo hammers away a bit but rams Duggan’s head into the buckle for no effect at all. Duggan gets punched over into the corner and there’s the tag to Hart. Everything breaks down and Duggan hits Bravo with the board to give Hart the pin.

Rating: C. This was fine but Duggan’s reactions are amazing. The guy was probably the third most over guy in the company at this point, which is covering a lot of ground given how over some of the guys were in 1989. This was fine for an opener but the ending was never quite in doubt, which is ok.

We get a clip of some people pulling their numbers earlier. DiBiase isn’t thrilled at all and immediately goes to find Slick to work out a deal of some kind. These segments need to come back, if nothing else to try to make us believe the numbers are random. The Bushwhackers are happy with their numbers but they trade anyway. Honky is mad about his number. Bad News says his is good news. Demolition seems annoyed. Jake….you can’t tell emotion from him anyway. The Rockers don’t seem to hate theirs.

It’s time for the Super Posedown, which is exactly that: Ultimate Warrior and Rick Rude posing against each other to further their feud. Warrior is IC Champion here and man alive if this happened on a PPV today the fans would likely riot. Well not riot but boo heavily at least. Heenan actually sucks up to the fans because it’s decided by fan vote. Again, the ending here isn’t exactly in doubt. This goes on WAY too long, as it’s just posing and people booing/cheering depending on who is posing. Rude finally attacks Warrior with a bar and bails. Warrior chases after him and that’s it. This somehow took nearly fifteen minutes.

Womens’ Title: Judy Martin vs. Rockin Robin

Robin is defending and is Jake Roberts’ real life half sister. Sherri is in the ring and wants the title shot at the winner of this. Martin misses a charge and Sherri sits in on commentary. They pound on each other and it’s clear that they’re not incredibly skilled in the ring. Martin slams her down and blocks a sunset flip with a punch to the head. Robin puts on a Boston Crab as this is going nowhere.

Martin blocks an O’Connor Roll as Sherri complains about not getting a rematch yet. Gorilla talks about the process you have to go through to get a rematch, which is a nice sounding idea when you think about all the automatic title rematches you get today. Imagine that: EARNING a title match. Something resembling a DDT gets two on Martin but Robin misses an elbow drop. Martin misses one also but a backslide gets two for Judy. Robin kicks her in the face for two and gets the same off a small package. Sherri: “Come on somebody win.” Robin goes to the middle rope, fakes Martin out, and cross bodies her to retain.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here but the ending wasn’t bad. The Women’s Title would be retired about 13 months later and wouldn’t be restored until about 1993. At the end of the day, no one cares about womens wrestling other than for how small their outfits are. Robin and Martin aren’t exactly eye candy either, so this didn’t do much for anyone. At least it was short though.

Slick says the Twin Towers (Boss Man and Akeem) are probably winners of the Rumble but denies knowing anything about shenanigans with DiBiase. Sean Mooney has footage (the original Vickie Guerrer) of Slick and DiBiase together and suddenly Slick realizes he misunderstood Mooney the first time. He has no comment though.

Rude runs his mouth a bit about beating Warrior. This must be intermission.

Yep, it’s intermission as we get promos from a few managers, saying their guys are going to win. Nothing to see here but we hear from Fuji (representing the Powers of Pain), Liz (Mega Powers) and Jimmy Hart (Honky Tonk Man and Greg Valentine). Like I said, nothing to see here.

Jesse is sitting on the throne that will go to either Haku or Race. He thinks he might just run for King because the chair is comfortable.

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Race was King but got hurt and the crown went to Haku. This is his chance to get it back in a one time only return to the ring. Harley shoves over Haku’s throne to start and the brawl is on. You know Race is going to be the brawler in this. Back in and Race pounds away before suplexing Haku down for two. Heenan manages both guys here but Race is kind of the face by default.

They head to the floor again with Race being sent into the post and chopped a few times. Haku sends him back to the floor after a few seconds in the ring as we stall for a few moments. More chops have Race in trouble as Jesse talks about Hogan injuring Race, which is only kind of true. Race no sells a headbutt and gets two off a piledriver. They collide again and Race falls to the floor as Heenan plays both sides, saying he’s for both guys when the other is out of earshot.

Back in and Race punches some more before getting two off a suplex. Haku gets sent to the floor again as it’s pretty clear there’s not much to this match. Race tries to piledrive Haku on the floor but gets backdropped as is the usual. A second attempt at a piledriver works but not incredibly well. Back in and a clothesline puts Haku down for two but Haku comes back and misses a top rope headbutt. Race misses a headbutt of his own and charges into the superkick from Haku (looked GREAT) for the pin to keep the crown in Tonga or wherever he’s from.

Rating: D+. This wasn’t terrible and the ending kick looked awesome, but other than that there wasn’t much to see here. Race was clearly old and banged up and he didn’t have a lot to work with in the form of Haku. The crown was mostly a minor title that was only somewhat official. Nothing to see here, but no one cares about anything but the Rumble tonight anyway.

Time for more Rumble promos, with Beefcake, Greg Valentine (both of whom say they just need their fists), the Powers of Pain (Fuji does the talking for them), Big John Studd (freshly back in the company), Mr. Perfect (pretty new at this point) and Savage (insane of course).

DiBiase is much happier about his number now.

Heenan says the Family (Brainbusters and Andre) is ready and Andre says he’ll thrown them out if he has to. Arn whispers to Tully when Andre isn’t looking because Arn Anderson is more awesome than you.

Hogan gives his usual promo with the focus on Boss Man and Akeem this time.

Royal Rumble

The entrants are every two minutes, allegedly. #1 is Ax and #2 is Smash, beginning a tradition of having partners fight at the beginning of these matches. They immediately pound on each other and amazingly enough, they actually sell the offense. It’s a bunch of clotheslines and punches, but the key to Demolition has always been how HARD they hit each other, which is what you get a lot of here. In at #3 is Andre, which gives us one heck of a handicap match.

Demolition immediately hits a double clothesline on Andre and start demolishing him to a BIG pop. Andre is way past being past his prime here but this is still cool to see. Here’s Mr. Perfect at #4 and he strolls down the aisle, which is pretty wise for him. Andre starts fighting Demolition off and for some reason this turns into a tag match. Andre easily throws out Smash, resulting in a 2-1 attack on Andre.

The Giant fights them off and Perfect sells a headbutt as only Mr. Perfect can. Here’s Ronnie Garvin at #5 and they get Andre tied up in the ropes. The Giant breaks free and beats up Ax while Garvin and Hennig fight a bit. Andre shifts over to beat up Perfect, giving us some more awesome overselling. Greg Valentine is in at #6 to make it 4-1 against Andre. AGAIN Andre is all like BRING IT ON and knocks them away, eliminating Garvin in the process.

Andre chokes Valentine in the corner while Ax and Perfect continue their rather uninteresting fight. Andre starts choking Ax and the look on his face is eerie. Jake Roberts is #7 and Andre immediately pounds him down. Nothing of note happens for two minutes so here’s Ron Bass at #8 as Jake gets eliminated by Andre. Shawn Michaels is in at #9, giving us Ax, Perfect, Andre, Bass, Valentine and Michaels. As I type that, Perfect knocks out Ax.

Perfect throws Shawn over the top rope but some skinning the cat brings him back in. Shawn dropkicks Perfect to the apron as we get into a sell-off. #10 is Butch who gets a big pop of his own. As Butch gets in, here’s Jake Roberts again with the snake to scare Andre out of the match. The fans look at something, presumably Jake and Andre in the aisle, as things settle down a lot. It’s Honky Tonk Man at #11 as things are in that annoying slow period of most Rumbles.

Tito Santana is in at #12 to finally balance the heel/face ratio out a bit. There’s almost nothing going on here other than the energy burst you get from the new guys coming in. Bass hits a good backdrop on Michaels as Santana barely survives an attack from Valentine. Bad News Brown is #13 and Butch and Santana (there’s a pairing for you) dump Honky. Butch gets beaten up and Shawn goes up top to jump on Bad News and Bass. Marty Jannetty is #14 and the Rockers double dropkick Bass out.

Tito kills Valentine with the forearm and world champion Randy Savage is #15. NOW the place wakes up as he hammers away on Bad News. Perfect and Savage go at it in a match that would have the purists drooling. Speaking of making purists drool, Arn Anderson is #16. Savage dumps Valentine as Shawn fights Arn. Savage….saves Anderson and eliminates Shawn? Now there’s one I didn’t expect. To recap, we’ve got Marty, Anderson, Butch, Brown, Savage, Santana and Perfect in there at the moment. That’s quite the lineup for the most part.

Tully Blanchard makes the lineup even stronger at #17. Just to be clear, that’s two tag teams getting back to back numbers. Gee, what are the odds? The Brainbusters double team Marty as we’re just waiting for Hogan at this point. And here he is at #18. There goes Perfect, giving him the new Iron Man record at just under 28:00. Off camera, Savage and the Busters put Santana out as Hulk beats up Brown. Hogan fights off all three heels as Savage beats on Butch. Nice partner, especially after Hogan saved Savage when he got to the ring.

Here’s Luke at #19 as things slow down again. Butch gets thrown out after a remarkable 18 minutes. Hogan hot shots Blanchard but has to beat up Luke instead of eliminating Tully. After a brief lull, here’s Koko B. Ware at #20. After more of that epic Hulk vs. Luke showdown, Arn goes up top and is immediately slammed down by Hogan. Dude, you’re best friends with RIC FLAIR. Why would you think that’s smart? Hogan dumps Koko and Luke but gets double teamed by the Busters.

Warlord is #20 and Hogan clotheslines both Busters out at the same time. Warlord poses on the apron, gets in, and is clotheslined out in 2 seconds flat, setting a record that would last 20 years. Hogan also dumps Bad News, but it takes out Savage in the process which adds even more fuel to the Mega Powers Exploding in less than a month. Liz comes in to play peacemaker and the Powers shake hands.

Now we get the big showdown of the match as Big Boss Man is #21 and gets to face Hogan one on one. This is when Boss Man weighed like 400lbs and was just freaking fat. Hulk slams Boss Man down and pounds away in the corner but falls victim to a splash. A piledriver puts Hulk down and Boss Man stands tall. Gorilla says Hogan has been out there for half an hour (it’s been about 8 or 9 minutes) and Jesse is hilarious in freaking out.

To give us the third team back to back in this Rumble, #22 is Akeem. Hogan rams them together and slams Akeem but the numbers catch up with Hogan. After a brief comeback, a double splash crushes Hogan and he’s easily tossed. Hogan, ever the jerk, pulls Boss Man out and beats on him, which is apparently an elimination. Beefcake is #23, which means we just missed what could have been a good house show tag match.

Hogan and Boss Man brawl to the back as we get to the pretty dull third act of the Rumble. Red Rooster is #24 and helps double team Akeem a bit. They try to dump Akeem but Barbarian comes in at #25 and breaks it up. Gorilla: “That was kind of stupid.” Taylor and Akeem pair off, as do Barbarian and Beefcake and the heels take over. Akeem crushes the Rooster (Terry Taylor in case you’re some young kid) and here’s Big John Studd at #27.

Nothing of note happens there so here’s Hercules at #28. Again nothing happens so Rick Martel is #29. He goes right for Akeem but Studd shoves him away because Akeem is his big piece of chicken tonight. DiBiase is of course #30, giving us DiBiase, Akeem, Hercules, Beefcake, Studd, Barbarian, Rooster and Martel. Jesse and Gorilla have a debate about what a manager is as DiBiase throws out the Rooster to get us down to seven.

DiBiase and Barbarian team up to put out Hercules and Beefcake, leaving us with five. This last part isn’t quite death for the match but it’s certainly a bad sickness. Martel puts out the Barbarian to give us a final four. Akeem misses a splash on Martel in the corner and Rick fires off some dropkicks to no avail.

A cross body is caught and Akeem dumps Martel to get us down to Studd, Akeem and DiBiase. Akeem pounds on Studd as DiBiase gives instructions. Studd pulls Ted in front of a splash and dumps Akeem to get us down to two. DiBiase offers money but Studd shakes a finger at him. Studd actually fires off some suplexes to the shock of Monsoon. The elimination is academic and Studd wins.

Rating: C-. The last third REALLY hurts this. It’s not that it’s bad but after Hogan leaves you could almost hear a pin fall. Ha I made a wrestling joke. Also, John Studd? Really? They’ve got all those guys in there and they pick Studd to win? After Wrestlemania the guy was pretty much gone and I don’t think there was ever a clear reason for Studd winning given, other than they thought he was going to be a big deal. It’s just an odd pick and one that hindsight doesn’t look kindly on. Anyway not a terrible match but the booking hurts it.

Savage reassures himself that he’s still great. You can hear the paranoia and see the heel turn coming if you look hard enough.

Jesse and Gorilla wrap things up.

Overall Rating: D+. I can’t say this was a bad show because nothing on here is truly terrible, but it’s certainly not good either. This is very characteristic of the late 80s as other than Hogan and Savage, the stories were very limited at best. They were trying though and that’s something you can’t fake. Not a terrible show, but it’s nothing more than a moment \for the most part.

Ratings Comparison

Jim Duggan/Hart Foundation vs. Dino Bravo/Fabulous Rougeaus

Original: C+

Redo: C

Rockin’ Robin vs. Judy Martin

Original: C-

Redo: D

King Haku vs. Harley Race

Original: C

Redo: D+

Royal Rumble

Original: C+

Redo: C-

Overall Rating

Original: C-

Redo: D+

About the same again. That’s interesting compared to what happened with the Survivor Series Redos.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/08/royal-rumble-count-up-1989/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

So back in late 1987, the NWA was going to start airing PPVs of their own with the first one being Starrcade on Thanksgiving night. Vince, ever the ball buster, decided to air his own show on that night called the Survivor Series, saying that whoever didn’t air his show wouldn’t get to air Wrestlemania. Most of the cable companies bailed on Crockett (NWA owner for all intents and purposes) and aired Survivor Series, but they told Vince to NEVER do that again.

This is where Vince got crafty: he couldn’t air a PPV on the night that Crockett was running his next PPV (Bunkhouse Stampede, which is one of the DUMBEST and most screwed up shows ever for a ton of reasons, including not even being able to get the freaking start time right), but he could run a free TV show on that night. Therefore, he got an idea from one Pat Patterson about a battle royal with timed entrances and a card around it. The idea is the Royal Rumble, and there have been twenty five of them so far. Let’s get to it.

Royal Rumble 1988
Date: January 24, 1988
Location: Copps Coliseum, Hamilton, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 18,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

So as I said, this is the first of the Rumbles and it aired on live TV instead of on Pay Per View. The battle royal tonight is twenty men instead of thirty and we also have three other matches on the card on top of that. We also get a bench press demonstration from Dino Bravo (just go with it) and the contract signing for Hogan vs. Andre II at the first live Main Event which would happen in twelve days. In a KB related story, I would happen in about ten days. Let’s get to it.

Vince does the intro over what I thought was Rude’s music. Oh it was Rude’s music. No wonder they sounded alike.

Rick Rude vs. Ricky Steamboat

This should work well with a career face vs. a career heel. That’s another thing you never get anymore: matches for the sake of having a match. You know what? It could work today too. For the sake of simplicity, Rick will only be used for Rude and Ricky will only be used for Steamboat. Rude pounds away to start but Steamboat fires off chops in retaliation. Rude throws him over the top because he’s still new at this WWF thing. Steamboat skins the cat back in and throws Rude to the floor.

Steamboat does Rude’s pose and Rude complains of a pull of the tights. Back in and Rude wants a test of strength and Dragon, ever the slow one, accepts. Down goes Ricky but he finally hits a knee to the hand to break the grip, followed by a wicked spin out to take Rude to the mat. Steamboat cranks on the arm and does so for a good while. The crowd is pretty much quiet here, so we can hear the individual shouts from fans which give Vince and Jesse something to talk about.

Rude escapes but Steamboat chops him right back down and armdrags him down as only Ricky can do. An elbow puts Ricky down for a bit and Rick pounds away some more. Steamboat comes back with chops and another armdrag into an armbar. More slugging out occurs with chops vs. punches dominating the action. In something you don’t often see, Steamboat seems to botch a spot, resulting in him backing into a knee from Rude and falling (intentionally) to the floor.

Rick sends Steamboat back first into the apron and slams him down as Steamboat is in trouble. There’s a camel clutch by Rude as he finally has a body part to work on. Steamboat taps but that wouldn’t mean anything else for about six years. The referee checks the arm and they make a BIG error as Ricky lets his arm fall three times before stopping it on the fourth drop. Jesse FREAKS as only he can but the match just keeps going. Gotta love that live TV thing right?

Anyway Steamboat stands up and drops Rude on his back to put both guys down. It’s Steamboat up first but a splash hits knees. Back to the chinlock but Ricky makes the ropes and sends Rude into the buckle ten times. A chop to the face gets two and we hit the mat for some technical stuff and a pinfall reversal sequence. By that I mean about five pin attempts each and the crowd is waking up now. Ricky suplexes Rude down but Rude pulls the referee in the way of the cross body. Rude puts on the over the shoulder backbreaker (his move before the Rude Awakening) but it’s a DQ win for Steamboat.

Rating: C. The main issue here was the length. This runs about eighteen minutes and a lame ending didn’t help things either. At least you had two talented guys in there to make the match work a bit better. Still though, cut about five minutes off of this one and it’s WAY better all of a sudden. Steamboat would be gone in just a few months.

It’s time for the bench press lift record attempt. Dino Bravo is doing the lifting (in wrestling gear) and Jesse is spotting. Frenchy Martin, Dino’s manager, is here too. Dino presses 415 to start but first demands complete and utter silence. The 415lbs are easily lifted ten times. We’re going for over 700 by the end so this may take awhile. Next up is 505, which I believe is what Yokozuna weighed when he debuted. That one only goes up eight times as we’re at six minutes spent on this so far.

This time it’s going to be 555. Great this is going to take even more time now. Dino stops to yell at the fans a bit first and now we’re going to the lifting. This one gets about seven reps as this continues to take time. Now it’s 595. They keep talking about a world record, even though there’s no official there to confirm this is happening or anything like that. Wait let’s yell at the fans some more before he lifts it three times. We’re at ten minutes now.

Jesse yells at McMahon a bit and Bravo takes forever to do 655. Gene doing the used car salesman selling of this segment helps a bit due to how over the top and ridiculous it is. Now they go for 715, but the record would be unofficial because the bar will have to be weighed later. We stop to yell at the fans of course first though and storms off. As Bravo goes to finish, Ventura reaches down and pulls the bar up. Yep, that’s the actual payoff of over fifteen minutes of this nonsense.

Women’s Tag Titles: Jumping Bomb Angels vs. Glamour Girls

These are real titles (held by the Glamour Girls at this point) which have perhaps the most confusing history ever, as the belts were literally bought and sold between two wrestling companies. Anyway, they’re here now and the Angels (Tateno and Yamazaki) beat the Glamour Girls (Judy Martin and Lelani Kai) in the finals of the Survivor Series match which basically set this up. This is also 2/3 falls.

I’m not entirely sure which is which on both teams but Vince doesn’t even know the names of the Angels at all until someone tells him later on. The Angels immediately charge at the Girls and hit stereo dropkicks to take over. For those of you unfamiliar with the Angels, basically imagine the Hardys before they became poster children for what drugs can do to you but with long hair and wearing one piece female swimsuits.

We start with Kai vs. Yamazaki (the one in pink. Got it) and a knee to the back from Martin gives the Girls control. Yamazaki Matrixes out of a cover and rolls Kai up for two. Off to Tateno for a kind of suplex out of a piledriver position for one. Jesse asks Vince the names of the Bomb Angels and Vince has NO idea. He suggests calling them pink and red. Yamazaki tries a cross body but it literally bounces off the shall we say rotund Martin.

Off to Kai again so Yamazaki knees her down before bring Tateno back in. Both Angels fire off forearms to take Kai down and there’s an Octopus Hold (a freaky kind of abdominal stretch from Japan) from Tateno. The Angels put on stereo figure fours before it gets down to just Tateno on Kai. There’s a legdrop between the legs ala Jeff Hardy but instead Tateno spreads her own legs to spread Kai’s into the splits as well.

Yamazaki hooks something like a Sharpshooter while being off to the side of Kai. That’s incredibly painful looking and I don’t think I’ve ever seen it otherwise. The Angels get in a tug of war over Kai with Martin losing the war. Martin makes a tag but it doesn’t count because her feet weren’t on the apron. There’s a rule you never see enforced. Not that it matters as there’s the regular tag anyway. Martin comes in and beats on Tateno a bit before hitting a falling backwards facedrop out of a powerbomb position for the first fall. Big Show called that the Alley Oop if it wasn’t clear.

Martin pounds on Tateno after the break but Tateno bridges out in the Matrix move from the mat. Martin misses a splash and there’s Yamazaki again. A middle rope clothesline puts Martin down for two as Vince knows the Angels’ names now. The Angels cause some heel miscommunication but Martin loads up the same move that won her the first fall. In a classic example of PSYCHOLOGY, Tateno rolls through it into a sunset flip for the second fall this time. See? She LEARNED over the course of the match. That shows thinking, which is psychology! It’s not that hard! She slipped a bit on the flip but I’ll forgive it this time.

The third fall begins with a double clothesline from the Angels for two on Kai but Lelani pounds away on her in retaliation. Off to Martin who blocks a fisherman’s suplex and escapes a backslide out of the corner. A slingshot sends Yamazaki into the wrong corner and double teaming gets two on her.

Off to Tateno who is thrown around even more than Yamazaki was. Tateno comes back with a pair of release atomic drops minus the knees and it’s off to Yamazaki for a top rope knee for two. A double underhook suplex gets two on Kai but a senton backsplash misses for Tateno. With Kai trying to get in, the Angels hit stereo missile dropkicks on Martin for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B. For the late 80s and women’s wrestling, this was off the charts. The Angels are every bit as good as any male cruiserweight not named Mysterio you’ll ever see and when they’re against people like the Girls, their skills are shown off even better. This was beyond state of the art for this time period and is still amazing today. Check these chicks out and you won’t be disappointed.

We recap Hogan vs. Andre at Wrestlemania by getting the opening minute or so which saw Hogan trying the slam and Andre getting a “controversial” two count. Andre wants a rematch and has been sold to DiBiase, who wants to buy the world title. Andre showed how evil he was by attacking Hogan on SNME and easily choking him down, setting up the rematch in about two weeks and a match which drew an INSANE 15 rating on LIVE national TV on NBC. Today Vince would lose his mind at a 5 on cable, so this was unthinkable back then.

Oh and now we get the contract signing between Andre and Hogan on tonight’s show for the match on February 5 in Indianapolis. DiBiase is here too as Jesse points out how stupid the fans are for cheering for a song called Real American here in Canada. Even Jack Tunney is here. For those of you unfamiliar, picture Johnny Ace if he wasn’t dripping with charisma.

Gene actually calls Andre Mr. Roussimoff here, which you NEVER hear on WWF TV. Andre won’t sit down and then he won’t sign. Hogan signs but Andre wants to read the whole thing first. One thing to note: Gene has probably said the date of the match about ten times. It’s so simple yet so effective. Andre signs and beats up Hogan for fun to end this after a LONG time.

Jesse and Vince talk about the Rumble and say that if you go over the top, it doesn’t matter where your feet touch because you’re out. I’m assuming that means you have to hit the floor but it’s not exactly clear.

Royal Rumble

Okerlund explains the rules and the intervals are every two minutes here. If you don’t know the Rumble rules, you have no business reading this. It’s a battle royal, people come in every two minutes, there are 20 people in it (this year only) last man standing wins. #1 is Bret Hart and #2 is Tito Santana, and wouldn’t you know it their tag teams are feuding right now. I mean what are the odds?

They slug it out to start with no one having any kind of advantage. Bret finally takes him down and heads towards the rope as Butch Reed comes in at #3. This is a different kind of Rumble as heels don’t fight heels and faces don’t fight faces yet. They just kind of work together as you would expect them to. Tito is almost thrown out by Reed but he escapes and beats on both heels for a bit.

It’s Neidhart in at #4 as not a ton is happening so far in this match. This leaves Santana more or less down 3-1 and everyone pounds away on him. The clock is pretty lenient so far as there’s no way they’re going two minutes between each of these entrants. We get some slow triple teaming and after a choke on the ropes, here’s Jake Roberts in at #5 to quickly toss out Reed. We’ve got Roberts/Santana vs. the Hart Foundation which is quite the tag match when you think about it.

The Harts get beaten down and then thrown into each other but Neidhart breaks up the DDT. Bret piledrives Santana down and Harley Race is in at #6. The crowd is staying way into this which is a good sign for the future. Things kind of slow down a bit as the faces and heels beat on each other for a little while. Here’s Jim Brunzell at #7 to make it a six man tag for all intents and purposes.

Roberts goes EVIL by pulling on Neidhart’s beard. Only Reed has been eliminated so far. The good guys are in control at the moment with Race almost being thrown out. Here’s Sam Houston, Jake’s real life half brother, coming in at #8 to beat on everyone in sight. Well every heel at least. The Harts finally get together and throw out Santana to get us down to six people in the ring.

After about 90 seconds, here’s Danny Davis at #9. To be fair he’s barely a jobber so it’s not like this is going to give the heels any significant advantage. Oh wait he’s fighting Sam Houston so yeah, the heels are in control. Race gets caught in the ropes and Jake keeps knocking him back and forth in a funny bit. Davis tries to kick Jake and gets his leg caught, followed by a suplex from Roberts.

Danny escapes a DDT as we get Boris Zhukov at #10, maybe 80 seconds after Davis came in. Things continue to go slow as we’re trying to build up to a regular battle royal. Race goes after Boris in the first instance of heel vs. heel in this match. Race and Hart double team Brunzell for a bit as this continues to be slow. Don Muraco comes out as #11 but Nikolai Volkoff follows him out, apparently thinking he’s #11. Now there’s a story you don’t see that often but which could work.

Brunzell puts out Zhukov and apparently Nikolai is going to be #12 in a few moments. After way too long of nothing happening, Nikolai is officially #12. Brunzell is put to the apron but gets back in just as Race is eliminated by Muraco. We’ve got eight in there at the moment, which would be Hart, Neidhart, Roberts, Brunzell, Houston, Davis, Muraco and Volkoff. Race won’t leave ringside so as Duggan comes out at #13, he beats Race up on the way. This would lead to one of those so ridiculous it’s hilarious moments at the Slammys.

Duggan goes right after Neidhart because HE wants to be the Jim in this match. The place is way into him too so the crowd reaction is good. After maybe a minute here’s Ron Bass at #14. Volkoff dumps Brunzell as Jake and Neidhart collide. The clock gets even shorter as B. Brian Blair is #15. There are way too many people in the ring now. Everyone fights everyone as Hillbilly Jim is #16, and the fourth person in this match named Jim. He also dumps out Jim Neidhart to empty the ring a tiny bit.

Dino Bravo is #17 as Bass dumps Houston. Back to slow motion mode with everyone pounding on people near the ropes without really doing much. Ultimate Warrior (doesn’t mean anything yet) is #18 and Bret is FINALLY put out by Don Muraco. I timed this next one, and the One Man Gang comes out at #19, 53 seconds after Warrior. They’re not even trying here. Gang immediately pounds on Roberts so Warrior jumps on the big man’s back. This is WAY before he would have been able to slam him anyway.

Gang dumps Blair and Roberts in about ten seconds, which is the best thing that could happen in this match. The Junkyard Dog is #20, giving us a final group of Davis, Volkoff, Muraco, Bass, Hillbilly Jim, Dino Bravo, Ultimate Warrior, Gang, Duggan and Dog. Hillbilly and Gang hammer on each other as Duggan puts Volkoff out. Gang tosses Hillbilly as Bravo and Davis double team Duggan. This ends badly for Davis as Duggan dumps him to a BIG pop.

Bravo and Gang dump the Warrior as we’re down to six pretty quickly. Bass jumps the Dog and tosses him to get us down to five. Muraco dumps Bass and we have a final four of Muraco, Gang, Duggan and Bravo. Gang splashes Duggan in the corner, leaving Muraco to have to fight off both guys. He even takes Frenchy Martin down with a dropkick, only to have Gang clothesline him out to get us down to three.

Jim gets double teamed for awhile and Bravo drops an elbow on him. The same clothesline sequence the heels tried earlier backfires and Bravo gets clotheslined out. Duggan pounds on Gang in a Mid-South reunion but a single shot from Gang takes him down. Gang beats on him next to the ropes, so Duggan low bridges him to win the first Royal Rumble.

Rating: C+. This is one of those matches where the words “well, they tried” come to mind. That’s the best way to put this match: they didn’t really know what they were doing yet, but they tried. The lack of star power hurt this one as only Duggan and maybe Dog were big names here. It wouldn’t be until next year when the star power came into this and it became a main event thing. Still though, it’s certainly not a bad match and they would get better as time went on.

We recap (see? It even happened back then) the contract signing from earlier tonight.

Hogan is in the arena (in jeans, which is a weird image for some reason) and says that he wants Andre. Standard hype interview for a big match but it’s Hogan in the late 80s so you know it’s awesome.

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Another 2/3 falls match here just to fill in the final part of the show. The Islanders have recently kidnapped Matilda and are recently back off suspension for returning the dog. Tama and Powers (It’s Haku/Tama vs. Jim Powers/Paul Roma) start things off and no one can get a real advantage in the early going. The Stallions beat on Tama a bit, with shots to the head for some reason, before it’s Haku in off the tag.

A cross body gets two for Roma and the Stallions work on the arm for awhile. Off to Tama who gets in like one shot before we cut to a camera angle from over the announcers shoulders. That’s a new one. Powers gets caught by a double headbutt and Haku hammers away on him some more. This continues to go nowhere so I think out of boredom it’s off to Roma vs. Tama.

Roma dropkicks Tama down but Haku low bridges Roma, sending him to the floor and injuring the knee. That’s good enough for a countout for the first fall and the Stallions take Roma to the dressing room to get his knee looked at. In other words, we need a reason to show the contract signing again and let Andre talk a bit. Just like Hogan, Andre doesn’t have much to say but it hypes up the Main Event.

Back to the match after the promo, the recap and a pair of breaks and it’s basically Powers in a handicap match now. You can see big gaps of seats where fans have left. For this one, I can’t say I blame them. Powers dropkicks him down and we hear about Giant-A-Mania from Jesse. Off to Tama who pounds away even more and kicks out of a small package at two. Tama’s jumping back elbow takes Powers down and it’s a little Samoan trash talk for good measure. Haku’s dropkick gets two and there’s a gutwrench suplex for two more.

It’s off to an abdominal stretch but Powers finally hiptosses out of it to get a breather. Haku misses a splash and things slow down again, but there’s no one for Powers to tag because of Roma’s knee injury. Roma finally tags himself in and Haku casually kicks the leg out to take over. Jesse wishes that was Vince’s knee because that’s the kind of guy he is. Tama puts on a half crab and the referee stops it.

Rating: D. This match is a victim of its spot on the card. The problem here is that everything else is done and this was the textbook definition of filler. It’s hard to care about something like this when there’s no story and no interest in this match, and on top of that it wasn’t even anything decent. This is one of those matches though where you can’t blame a lot of the problems on the wrestlers.

Jesse and Vince chat a bit about what we saw to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There’s one major thing to keep in mind about this show: it was on free TV. On PPV, this would have been bad, but to be fair they had no idea what they were going for here so anything good, which a lot of stuff on here was, was a surprise. This was a decent entry into the show, but they did WAY better next year when they had an idea what they were doing. Good first effort though.

As I did with the last series of reviews, I’ll be comparing the new ratings to the original ones and posting a link to the original review.

Ratings Comparison

Ricky Steamboat vs. Rick Rude

Original: C+

Redo: C

Jumping Bomb Angels vs. Glamour Girls

Original: B-

Redo: B

Royal Rumble

Original: C-

Redo: C+

Islanders vs. Young Stallions

Original: C-

Redo: D

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: C+

This show hasn’t changed much other than a few tweaks here and there.

Here’s the original review:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/01/08/royal-rumble-count-up-1988/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 25, 2000
Location: McKenzie Arena, Chattanooga, Tennessee
Attendance: 7,223
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

This is another request due to it being Christmas recently. One night late in WCW’s dying days, Raw has a show on Christmas night. If I remember right, Nitro didn’t air and I don’t think many people noticed. This is a few weeks after Armageddon and the 6 man Cell match so we’re rolling towards New Orleans and the Rumble which was very good. Let’s get to it.

And no this isn’t live of course. It was taped the Saturday before.

Here’s Stephanie to open the show. You know, the implants with a McMahon attached. She looks great though. The McMahons are celebrating Christmas at the moment, with Vince volunteering at a soup kitchen in Greenwich and HHH sending Steph here. Even Stephanie is getting into it, making something that reminds her of her mother: a fruitcake. We get a clip from the end of Smackdown, which is Rock and Undertaker arguing over something. Therefore tonight it’s Rock vs. Taker.

She brings out Edge and Christian with Angle as well. Angle is in his first reign as world champion while the Canadians are tag champions. Edge wishes Stephanie a Merry Christmas but they’re sorry that Foley isn’t here due to being fired last week. Christian insults Chattanooga for a bit and talks about Smackdown, which we see a clip from showing Edge pinning Rock to win the tag titles.

Angle does the same but with his own brand of humor. He’s given himself a Christmas gift and has flown out his family. Here’s an army of people that all look like Kurt. He introduces all of his family and all of their accomplishments. He talks about hitting Foley with a chair so the fans chant for Foley. Stephanie reminds us that he’s fired and the fans boo Kurt’s family. They sing Walkin In A Winter Wonderland until Jericho FINALLY cuts them off.

He tells Angle to shut up. Jericho liked the singing but instead it should have been the Twelve Days of Christmas. We have six Angles who will never be a laying, two valley girls and Stephanie, who gets all of her usual insults, in a a pear tree. For Christmas, Jericho wants the world title, and he wants it tonight. Angle yells but Stephanie cuts him off. The title shot is denied but instead it’s a six man: Angle/Canadians vs. Jericho/whatever team Chris wants. Jericho says that’s nice but he didn’t get anything for Stepahanie. What do you get for someone who’s had everyone? Jericho implies the Dudleys will be his partners.

Kurt gives his family a tour of the arena and runs into K-Kwik (R-Truth) and that’s about it.

Hardy Boys vs. Dean Malenko/Chris Benoit

Benoit is IC Champion and Dean is Light Heavyweight Champion. In the back, Matt tells Lita to stay in the back because she’ll get hurt. Lita goes anyway. Big brawl to start and Malenko pulls Benoit to the floor. Jeff is like cool man and hits a huge Poetry in Motion to the floor. That looked awesome. Benoit SNAPS off a dragon screw on Jeff’s leg to take over. That looked sick. Malenko works on the knee a bit as well but Jeff gets a SWEET spinning leg sweep cradle for two. A double dropkick puts the Radicalz down and it’s off to Matt. Everything breaks down and Lita hits Dean low. Top rope legdrop ends this.

Rating: C-. Nothing great here but the knee stuff was great. By that I mean one move but you get the idea. This would lead to Dean getting a date with Lita which wound up in a hotel room and Lita in some very nice lingerie. Anyway, not much to see here but it was nice to get the Hardys away from the Dudleys and Canadians.

Post match Matt gets put in the Texas Cloverleaf and Lita in the Crossface.

Post break Lita is being checked on when Benoit jumps Matt again.

Rock arrives and doesn’t care to hear about his match with Taker.

Debra is still Lieutenant Commissioner but it’s not fun without Foley anymore. She makes a triple threat Hardcore Title match with Raven, Blackman and Holly.

Vince calls Stephanie on voicemail and likes the match. He says he has to do something real quick at the soup kitchen but Trish’s voice is heard giggling.

We get a clip of Austin getting chokeslammed by Kane and then Austin demanding a match with him, which he gets tonight. Austin says he’ll beat Kane up tonight.

Hardcore Title: Hardcore Holly vs. Raven vs. Steve Blackman

Blackman is champion. Raven and Holly get into it before Steve gets there. I’m not sure what you want me to say here as it’s your usual one guy gets knocked down, the other two fight, the third makes the save. The challengers fight into the crowd but Blackman beats them both down out there. They go under the stage and into the back where Raven beats up what appears to be some stagehands. They go outside and Raven is thrown down some stairs. Holly finds a random 2×4 and swings at Blackman. He misses though and Blackman hits a German onto the hood of a car to retain.

Rating: D+. As I’ve said before, once you’ve seen one of these matches, you’ve seen them all. It’s just basic brawling with weapons that goes nowhere and then they have the ending. They had beaten this so far into the ground but by keeping it down to like three minutes per match, I think it’s ok.

Blackman is walking back to the locker room but Raven hits him with a board and steals the title.

The XFL is coming. OH YEAH!

Here’s Regal who is European Champion. Little trivia for you: he’s one of only two Europeans to hold that title. He blasts Americans for awhile until Kane comes out for his match. Ok then.

Kane vs. Steve Austin

Brawl to start with Austin hammering him into the corner. Regal is on commentary. A clothesline puts Kane down and another puts him on the floor. Austin gets pulled out there and Kane takes over. Regal gets up for some reason and Austin takes him down as well. Austin stomps on both of them as this is a total brawl. Back in the ring a big boot puts Austin down and they slow down.

A second boot is blocked and Austin goes for the knee. Kane fights back and wraps Austin’s leg around the post. Lawler says Kane is the official first entrant in the Rumble. Back in the top rope clothesline gets two. After a suplex gets two it’s a bearhug. Austin comes back with the Thesz Press and the elbow. Chokeslam, Stunner and Tombstone are countered until a Stunner hits. Regal pops up on the apron and Kane gets up. Regal finally gets in for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was fine. It was just a brawl that ran about seven and a half minutes and that’s all it really needed to be. The interesting thing is you could easily compare this to a lot of Cena’s matches on Raw today. There wasn’t anything to it for the most part and there wasn’t supposed to be. However Cena gets blasted for it and Austin is one of the most popular stars ever. Go figure.

Regal tries to bring in a chair but Austin clocks both guys with it instead.

Taker says he isn’t surprised by having to fight Rock later. He says Rock has the bark but he has the bite. Taker is still face here.

Cue The Kat in a robe. She has a gift with her. She gets in front of the announce table and grabs a mic. The gift is for JR and it’s the latest Divas video. As for King, Kat gets on the table and pulls the robe open to reveal some red lingerie. She shows the crowd too. Jerry gets a kiss also.

Stephanie barges in on T&A who says Trish isn’t here. She leaves and they imply Trish is with Vince.

Angle calls his parents as his brothers/cousin watch. Well that was pointless.

Too Cool vs. T&A

Grandmaster vs. Test to start. Stephanie comes out to watch, probably because of the jokes T&A made after she left. Sexay hits a middle rope dropkick and it’s off to Scotty so he can get beaten up for awhile. Albert comes in and Scott can’t do anything. Baldo (Albert) Bomb gets two as Grandmaster makes the save. Scotty gets in some kicks and a forearm to set up a double tag. Everything breaks down and Scotty sets for the Worm. Test kicks Scotty’s head off after it hits. He sets for the ending but Stephanie distracts him, allowing Grandmaster to roll up Test for the win.

Rating: D. Didn’t like this one at all. This whole show has felt like it’s just a labor to get through and that’s not good. To be fair though it’s Christmas night so it’s not like anyone is watching. Stephanie came in to mess with them, presumably to cost Trish’s team, but this went nowhere.

Post break, Albert comes in to talk with Stephanie. He offers his services to Stephanie for whatever she needs.

Chris Jericho/Dudley Boys vs. Kurt Angle/Edge/Christian

Jericho and Christian start things off. The fans want tables and Jericho tries a quick Walls attempt but settles for a slingshot into a rollup for two instead. D-Von and Edge come in and things speed up. Bubba comes in and does his always funny yelling. What’s Up to Edge. It’s Table Time already and everything breaks down on the outside. Edge hammers on Bubba but it’s quickly off to Christian.

The beating goes on for about 20 seconds before it’s off to Jericho and Angle. Jericho gets in a fight with Angle’s family who is all in the front row. The Dudleys put one of them through a table. The Dudleys and the Canadians fight up the ramp and Jericho hits a missile dropkick for no cover but the Lionsault eats knees. Angle Slam (and a good one too) beats Jericho.

Rating: C. This was going on so fast that it was hard to tell if it was good or bad. It certainly wasn’t boring and the big stuff looked pretty good. I liked it for the most part but much like the rest of this show and the show overall, it came and went and that’s all there really is to say about it.

The Angle family beats him down but the Dudleys make the save.

Edge and Christian say they’ll get the Dudleys for what they did.

Right to Censor vs. APA

It’s Buchanan/Godfather this time. Buchanan gives a very southern promo, talking about how evil the Dudleys are. Bradshaw starts with Godfather and the beating begins. Farrooq and Buchanan come in and the bald one takes a spinebuster. Bradshaw comes in and runs people over, including a top rope shoulder. Ivory interferes and Jackie runs her over. They get in the ring because Jackie has to get on my nerves at least once a year. Val Venis uses the distraction to run in and DDT Bradshaw. A Buchanan legdrop ends this. The match was nothing.

We get a video of Chyna taking a spike piledriver and injuring her neck. She had an MRI so we get a sitdown interview with her. Short version: I’m hurt, I’m sad, I’m successful outside the ring, I don’t like RTC, I’ll be back but not against men. Somehow that took six minutes.

Rock is in the back and cuts Kevin Kelly off because they are chanting his name. He gives his version of Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer and sings to Undertaker a bit too.

Undertaker vs. The Rock

I’ve never really seen these two have a good match so maybe this is the exception. Taker pounds him down and knocks Rock to the floor with one punch. Rock gets dropped onto the barricade and the table as JR is running out of room to run. Back in the ring Rock fires off a few rights and the jumping clothesline to take over. Swinging neckbreaker gets no cover but a Russian legsweep gets two.

Taker gets in a big boot and pounds away on the back. They mess up something so Taker hits a side slam for two. DDT by Rock gets two. More back work by Taker and this match isn’t breaking the streak these two have. Oh joy: it’s a bearhug. Rock fights out and now Taker hits a DDT of his own for two. Chokeslam and Rock Bottom are countered but a chokeslam hits. No cover though because he wants a Last Ride. And here’s Rikishi to interfere. Spinebuster to Taker but Rikishi pulls the top rope down and Rock wins by REALLY LAME DQ.

Rating: D-. What a boring match. They walked around, punched each other a lot, and that’s about it. The really bad ending didn’t help anything at all but hey, Rikishi is a top heel right? They don’t really give a reason or a thought as to whether or not it would work, but he was the next guy to feud with Rock I believe. Give me a break.

Rikishi stands tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: F+. OH MAN thank goodness it’s over. This was one of the least interesting shows I’ve seen in longer than I can remember. Nothing happened here, no one cared, no one wanted to be on the show it seemed, and nothing here would have seemed to have mattered. That being said, it’s unlikely anyone watched it but if one person did, it beat Nitro that night. Horrible show though.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

No Way Out of Texas: In Your House #20
Date: February 15, 1998
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 16,110
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

Since we have the main event already set for Wrestlemania, tonight’s main event is a way to develop the world title feud while also tying in the other main feuds. The main event is an eight man tag between Austin/Owen Hart/Cactus Jack/Chainsaw Charlie (Terry Funk) vs. Shawn Michaels/HHH/New Age Outlaws. However since Shawn is injured, a replacement will be announced during the show. Let’s get to it.

Marc Mero/The Artist Formerly Known As Goldust vs. Headbangers

Goldust is still desperate for attention and is in this tag team which won’t bring him much attention whatsoever. Mero’s entrance gets a huge pop due to Sable coming with him. Goldust’s manager Luna hates Sable so we might get a catfight sometime tonight. Mero tells Sable to get out of the ring and the arena because there’s only room for one beautiful lady. Goldust is dressed (I think) like Marilyn Manson tonight to keep the levels of strange up high.

Mosh and Mero get us going with Marc pounding away in the corner and dropping Mosh with a back elbow to the jaw. More body shots put Mosh down but he comes back with a hard clothesline to put Mero on the floor. Back in and Thrasher scores with a middle rope clothesline before it’s off to Goldust who is loudly booed. Thrasher stomps away at Goldust and brings in Mosh for a backdrop. In a nice double team, Thrasher goes to the middle rope to lift Mosh up and drop him down on Goldust for two.

Mero comes in off a blind tag and scores with a knee lift to take over on Thrasher. The fans chant for Sable to tick Marc off and it’s back to Thrasher for some running shoulder blocks. Goldust pulls Thrasher to the floor though and sends him into the steps to put the Headbangers on defense again. Back to Goldust for some slow fist drops and a running clothesline for two. Thrasher is bleeding from the back of his head but it doesn’t look that bad.

Mero pounds away and puts on a chinlock as the blood starts flowing much worse. The fans get all over Mero to mess with his head again so it’s back to Goldust. Thrasher comes back with a quick cross body for two but Goldust makes a tag to Mero who takes Thrasher down again. A choke with some wrist tape makes Thrasher scream even more and a sitout powerbomb gets two for Marc.

The TKO (Mero’s fireman’s carry into a spinning Diamond Cutter) is countered into a DDT and it’s finally off to Mosh. Everything breaks down and Luna crotches Mosh to break up the powerbomb/legdrop combo. This brings out Sable (in less clothing than earlier) to go after Luna, but the distraction lets the Headbangers switch places, allowing Thrasher to roll up Mero for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match was pretty dull stuff but opening with Sable was a good idea. The fans absolutely loved her and she would get the crowd fired up every time she was on screen. Sable was probably the most financially successful Diva of all time as she drew insane money and ratings for the company around this time, which is unheard of for a woman in wrestling.

Luna tries to go after Sable but the guys break it up. Sable yells at Mero and slaps him down, furthering the split between the pair.

Jackyl, a semi-religious prophet character who did interviews and occasional commentary at this time, predicts that the mystery partner will lead DX and the Outlaws to victory tonight.

Owen doesn’t care who the mystery partner is but thinks things will be fine if Austin stays out of his way.

Light Heavyweight Title: Pantera vs. Taka Michinoku

Sunny is the guest ring announcer. Pantera, the challenger, is another guy who has had success in Mexico but isn’t known by about 99% of the American audience at any point in history. Brian Christopher comes out to do commentary as both guys speed things up to start. Taka slides to the floor and Pantera hits a nice dive but the camera is on Lawler and Christopher. Back inside and Pantera gets taken down by a nice headscissors to the floor, allowing Taka to hit his signature huge dive to wipe Pantera out.

Back in and Pantera is sent to the apron but he comes back with a top rope headscissors to the floor. The camera misses a suicide dive because of Lawler and Christopher again but thankfully replay shows us what we missed. Back in again and Pantera hits a butterfly backbreaker to set up a camel clutch. Off to a surfboard submission, complete with Pantera pulling on Taka’s neck for added leverage. Taka gets out and fires back with some strikes to the face but gets backdropped out to the floor.

Pantera hits a great looking dive over the top, landing head first on Taka’s back to keep the pressure on. A backbreaker sets up a top rope elbow to the back as Christopher talks about eating tacos with chopsticks. Taka gets in a shot to the ribs and goes up top, only to be caught in a top rope hurricanrana. Pantera gets two off a moonsault but misses a second attempt, allowing Taka to hit a top rope knee to the back of the head. Pantera comes back with a quick majistral cradle and a powerbomb for two each but misses a missile dropkick. The Michinoku Driver retains the title a few seconds later.

Rating: C+. Nice match here even though the fans didn’t care at all. The WWF was trying with this division but it never clicked with the audience. Taka was fine for what he was but he never became a big deal at all for the most part. Pantera was fine out there but the WWF never had a Mike Tenay (WCW commentator) to fill us in on the details and history of all these guys.

Post match Christopher tries to go after Taka but Lawler stops him, allowing Taka to dive on both of them to show them up.

Cactus Jack and Chainsaw Charlie don’t care who the mystery partner is. Tonight is all about revenge for them though so they’ve been coming up with some evil ways to hurt the Outlaws.

Godwinns vs. Quebecers

The Quebecers (Jacques and Pierre) were a glorified comedy tag team from 1993 who came back for a few weeks in 1998. No one is really sure why as they were nothing special and a very random team to bring back. It didn’t help that they lost their signature Mountie outfits and are now just generic guys. Henry and Jacques get us going with the fans booing both heel teams. After a minute of stalling it’s Henry grabbing a headlock but Jacques suplexes him down.

Off to Pierre to trade some wristlocks until Henry grabs an armbar. Back to Jacques who gets clotheslined down and screams a lot during a wristlock. This match is already boring and it doesn’t help after the fans haven’t been interested in anything tonight. The Godwinns double team Jacques as Lawler implies he wants Bill Clinton shot. Jacques gets a quick two off a sunset flip to Phineas but it’s back to Henry to keep control with a chinlock.

Phineas comes in to headbutt Jacques in the ribs but Jacques comes back with an elbow to the jaw. The ice cold tag brings in Pierre as things break down. A bad looking piledriver puts Phineas down and the Cannonball (assisted top rope flip splash from Pierre) gets two with Henry making the save. Not that it matters as Henry clotheslines Pierre from the apron to give Phineas the pin.

Rating: D-. It was long, it was boring, and the fans didn’t react to anything in the entire match. I’m not sure why the Quebecers were hired again but it never worked for the most part. The tag division still isn’t great from top to bottom but the Outlaws have definitely helped things out a lot.

The Godwinns lay out the Quebecers with the buckets post match.

The Outlaws say they don’t know who their partner will be.

Jim Cornette and Jeff Jarrett say they’re ready for Bradshaw. This is part of the NWA storyline, where the WWF brought in some old guys to be the NWA representatives and basically humiliate the NWA as a whole. Jarrett is going to go after the leg that the NWA guys hurt recently.

NWA North American Title: Bradshaw vs. Jeff Jarrett

Bradshaw, the native Texan and challenger, chases the NWA (Cornette, Jarrett, Rock N Roll Express and Barry Windham, Bradshaw’s former tag partner) to the floor to start. The NWA save for Cornette is quickly ejected to make this as fair as possible. Bradshaw throws Jarrett back inside and whips him with his chaps to start before chopping Jarrett down over and over. A big boot to the face staggers Jarrett and a clothesline sends him to the floor.

Bradshaw makes the mistake of going after Cornette though and Jeff gets in some kicks to the chest to take over. There’s a middle rope dropkick from Jeff for two and Cornette gets in some choking of his own. The choking only ticks Bradshaw off and he rolls up Jarrett for two. The referee yells at Jarrett though, allowing Cornette to blast Bradshaw in the bad knee with his tennis racket.

Jeff goes after the knee but gets crotched on the top rope. Bradshaw’s superplex is blocked but he catches Jeff in a fallaway slam to put both guys down. There’s the powerbomb to Jeff but Bradshaw pulls Cornette into the ring, allowing Jeff to hit Bradshaw in the chest with the tennis racket for the DQ.

Rating: D+. Not as bad of a match as some of them and the Texas man helped get the fans interested but this still didn’t do much for me. The NWA angle was little more than a way for Vince to make fun of the organization and make them look like nitwits. The match was nothing special either with a basic knee story which went nowhere.

Post match the NWA jumps Bradshaw until the LOD makes the save.

HHH and Chyna won’t say who the mystery partner is either but there’s a long list of people wanting the spot with DX because they’re the new train in wrestling. However, there’s no one that can replace Shawn so tonight it’s a handicap match.

Faarooq says the Nation is ready for war while Rock makes funny faces.

Nation of Domination vs. Ken Shamrock/Ahmed Johnson/Disciples of Apocalypse

This is a ten man tag with the Nation comprised of Faarooq, Rock, Kama, D’Lo Brown and the now heel Mark Henry. The match has been billed as a war of attrition which would imply survival and elimination rules, but this is one fall to a finish. Skull starts with D’Lo and Brown goes to the eyes for an early advantage. An atomic drop slows D’Lo down though and it’s off to Shamrock for a back elbow to the jaw. A double tag brings in Kama and Chainz with Mustafa pounding away in the corner.

Some quick elbows have Kama in trouble so he tags off to Mark for some raw power. Henry wants Ahmed though and the fans till care about Johnson at this point. Johnson wins a slugout and slams Henry down, only to have the Nation come in with some cheap shots to take over. D’Lo hits a spinebuster to put Ahmed down and a long distance frog splash gets no cover. Instead it’s off to Faarooq who walks into a spinebuster from Ahmed but Rock breaks up the Pearl River Plunge.

8-Ball gets the tag and powerslams Faarooq down for two as the good guys start speeding things up. It’s off to Rock vs. Shamrock which is one of the matchups that people have wanted to see. Rock scores with a quick DDT and stomps away in the corner before bringing in Kama to miss a charge. Skull and 8-Ball take turns on Kama as we get some o the original twin magic. Kama will have none of that though and takes Skull into the Nation corner for a beating.

Rock comes in with the yet to be named People’s Elbow for two and it’s back to Faarooq to punch Skull in the jaw a few times. Skull comes back with a faceplant but Rock breaks up a hot tag attempt. Henry comes in to pound on Skull for about ten seconds before it’s back to Kama for a chinlock. D’Lo gets a tag but misses a moonsault, finally allowing for the hot tag off to Shamrock. Everything breaks down and the ring is cleared except for Shamrock to ankle lock the Rock for the win.

Rating: C-. It’s not a great match or anything and the elimination rules would have helped things a lot, but it was certainly better than some of the other stuff tonight. Above all else though the fans CARED about this. It wasn’t some dull filler match that was there to make sure a card was complete but rather a match with characters and a story we’ve been given reason to care about. That’s a big step up from a lot of this show.

Post match Rock and Faarooq are about to fight but they eventually make up.

Austin doesn’t care who the mystery partner is.

We recap Kane vs. Vader. There isn’t much here other than Kane attacking Vader because Kane is evil and Vader wanting a fight as a result.

Kane vs. Vader

JR says Vader has won titles on more continents than he can count. That says a lot about the Oklahoma school system. Kane gets a BIG pop during his entrance. The brawl is on to start with Kane taking Vader down via a clothesline. They head outside with Kane still in control, even though the fans chant for Vader. Back in and Vader kicking away at the leg before dumping Kane out to the floor for a whip into the post.

They head back inside again with Kane hitting his top rope clothesline before pounding Vader down into the corner. A nice looking suplex puts Vader down and a top rope forearm to the back does the same. The slow pace continues until Kane clotheslines Vader down yet again. We hit the nerve hold for a bit until Kane slugs Vader down to stop another comeback bid.

Vader finally scores with some right hands in the corner and a low blow to break up a chokeslam attempt. The moonsault mostly connects but Kane pops up, only to be clotheslined out to the floor. Vader is sent into the steps but comes back with a fire extinguisher to blind Kane. Vader’s powerbomb is no sold and it’s a chokeslam and tombstone to give Kane the win.

Rating: C-. This wasn’t terrible but it’s another case where the ending was obvious. Everyone knew that Kane was destined to face Undertaker and that Undertaker was the only person capable of defeating him. Vader was nothing more than a jobber to the stars at this point and his time was coming to a close in the company.

Post match Kane grabs a wrench from under the ring and blasts Vader in the face with it to put him on the shelf for a few months.

We recap the main event which is really three feuds combined into one. The Outlaws put Cactus and Chainsaw into a dumpster and dumped them off the stage a few weeks back. Owen is feuding with HHH since Michaels wouldn’t do it. Austin would be feuding with Michaels but he’s injured, necessitating the mystery partner.

New Age Outlaws/HHH/??? vs. Steve Austin/Chainsaw Charlie/Cactus Jack/Owen Hart

This is one fall to a finish and anything goes. Billy Gunn brings a table with him just in case. The mystery partner is…..Savio Vega, who is a pretty big disappointment, but to be fair there was no one who wouldn’t have been a downgrade. At least he does have a history with Austin, but Rock would have been a much better choice. Cactus brings a small dumpster full of weapons to make sure this is as violent as possible. Austin comes out to a roar and the fight is on fast.

Austin blasts Billy in the head with a trashcan lid but Billy bails from a Stunner attempt. The bad guys all bail to the floor as Austin and Charlie rule the ring. Everyone heads to the floor now with Austin choking HHH with I think a broom. Back in the ring and it’s Cactus working over Road Dogg while Austin pounds on the back of HHH’s head. The table is brought in as Charlie hits Dogg in the head with something in a bag. Dogg is sent into but not through a table in the corner as the carnage continues. This is one of those matches where it’s practically impossible to call most of the stuff.

Gunn is powerslammed through the table and Vega is sent knees first into the steps. HHH has to break up a Sharpshooter on Gunn and DX actually makes a comeback. Austin gets pounded down with a trashcan lid and HHH powerbombs Owen for two. HHH blasts Charlie in the head five or six times with a trashcan but it takes a DDT to put him down for two. Owen comes back with a spinebuster to HHH and a quick Sharpshooter but Road Dogg breaks it up.

The referee actually tries to get people on the aprons for a tag match but they’ll have none of it. Road Dogg hits Charlie low and the Outlaws double powerbomb him through a pair of chairs. We actually get some of the people on the apron and start (seven minutes after the bell) with Billy pounding Charlie down until it’s off to HHH for more of the same. Dogg suplexes Charlie onto a trashcan lid for two as Cactus makes the save.

Austin comes in without a tag and throws a trashcan at Gunn’s head but it’s HHH with an atomic drop on Charlie before Austin can do any more damage. Owen gets the tag but the referee was busy with Road Dogg so it doesn’t count. You know for a match where anything goes, it certainly seems like there are a lot of rules being enforced. Charlie runs Road Dogg over and makes the hot tag off to Cactus to clean house. He puts Road Dogg under part of a table in the corner and throws Gunn into the same corner to crush Dogg even worse.

A double Mandible Claw slows the Outlaws down but HHH hits Cactus low to break up the hold. The fans demand Austin but get Cactus and Billy fighting to the floor instead. Gunn crushes Cactus with the steps and we head back inside for a two count from HHH. Savio comes in to wrap barbed wire around Cactus’ head before kicking him in the ribs. Owen FINALLY comes in to break it up despite the lack of a tag but Vega blasts Cactus in the head (still wrapped in wire) with a chair.

Cactus ducks a Gunn chair shot which blasts Dogg in the head and Jack has an opening. The hot tag brings in Austin to the pop of the night and house is cleaned. Austin destroys everything in sight and sends Road Dogg to the floor. He stomps away on Gunn in the corner before Dogg comes back in for the Stunner from Austin and the pin.

Rating: B. This was a nice tag match with the wild carnage part at the beginning and the perfect ending. There was no way this didn’t end with Austin getting the pin and standing tall which is exactly what we got. The fans went NUTS for Austin and he’s got all the momentum rolling into Wrestlemania. It’s the exactly right ending and it was done very well.

Post match Chyna gets in Austin’s face and gets a Stunner for her troubles to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The main event was exactly what it should have been but the rest of the show wasn’t much to look at. This was nothing more than a breather before the biggest show of the year which is all it was supposed to be. Austin is on top of the world at this point but he still needs to make it official next month in Boston.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 1997 Monday Night Raw Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/11/20/new-paperback-complete-1997-monday-night-raw-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

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Saturday Night’s Main Event #10
Date: March 14, 1987
Location: Joe Louis Arena, Detroit, Michigan
Attendance: 21,000
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jesse Ventura

This show is all about Hogan vs. Andre and everything else is just kind of going on in the background. The company is rolling right now though and it’s all going to pay off in the Silverdome soon after this. It’s very interesting that they’re running this show basically in the same city as Wrestlemania just about a month before the big show. Let’s get to it.

Hogan has no friends in the battle royal but knows he’s in there himself. All he wants to do is get even with Andre the Giant and that’s the only reason he’s in this match. It’s going to be just the two of them and Hogan will get what he wants.

Heenan says Andre is the best.

Elizabeth explains the stipulations for Savage vs. Steele: the winner gets the title and her.

The Hart Foundation say it’s their first defense on this show but it’s going to be Santana and Spivey’s last time period.

Jake Roberts and Damien will be feasting on 400lbs of King Kong Bundy.

Opening sequence.

Jesse says Vince looks like the Penguin from Batman.

Hogan says he lives in the danger zone and he’ll face Andre anyplace anytime. It doesn’t matter if every member of the Heenan Family comes after him at once, he’s getting his hands on Andre.

We recap Savage vs. Steele, which we covered last time. Steele loves Elizabeth but it’s really just a background story for Savage vs. Steamboat. Of note here, the wrestlers now have customized graphics, such as Savage’s saying Macho Man underneath a picture of his signature sunglasses.

Elizabeth says she’s scared but Savage says he’ll win. Okerlund says Elizabeth has to go out last due to some rules. Savage: “Well rules are made to be broken. LIKE YOUR NECK!”

After Savage’s entrance, Steele comes up to Elizabeth and says “George! Manager! BYE BYE!”

Intercontinental Title: George Steele vs. Randy Savage

Winner take all. Before we get the bell, we get our fourth separate segment with Elizabeth in the first ten minutes, with Gene wishing her luck. Elizabeth is sitting in a chair at ringside like a lifeguard. George goes over to her but Savage jumps him from behind to get things going. He immediately tries to take Elizabeth to the back but Steamboat is waiting on him.

The distraction lets George get in a shot from behind as the match really gets going. Savage goes face first into the buckle and takes a blind swing at the referee. Naturally Steele stops to eat a turnbuckle. The champ uses the distraction to knee Steele in the back and nail the top rope ax handle. Steele just bites the arm and chokes Savage in the air but again goes for a turnbuckle. This time he shoves the stuffing in Randy’s face, only to go outside and look at Elizabeth. Savage sends him into the barricade and knocks Elizabeth’s chair onto the Animal for the countout win.

Rating: D. I’m sick of these two fighting as they had a ridiculous three matches on the first ten episodes of this series. Thankfully this would be it for these two as Savage would go after Steamboat full time after this. Steele would have been easier to sit through if he mixed things up every now and then but it was always the same thing.

Steele takes the title belt and finds a poster of Elizabeth as a consolation prize.

Hogan is warming up and keeps saying the name of someone in the battle royal with every other name being Andre.

Heenan and Andre say the Giant will win.

Battle Royal

Hillbilly Jim, Ron Bass, Sika, Haku, Tama, Lanny Poffo, Hercules, Butch Reed, Paul Orndorff, Billy Jack Haynes, Koko B. Ware, Nikolai Volkoff, Blackjack Mulligan, Ax, Smash, Honky Tonk Man, Jim Brunzell, B. Brian Blair, Andre the Giant, Hulk Hogan

You should know most of these people. Sika’s sons are Rosey and Roman Reigns. Haku and Tama, collectively known as the Islanders, are actually faces here. Reed is a power guy who was around for a few years but never really did much. Billy Jack Hayes was around even less time and accomplished even less. Demolition and Honky Tonk Man are both newcomers. The announcers make no secret of the fact that this is all about Hogan vs. Andre.

Everyone gangs up on Hogan to start but some guys go after Andre instead. Hogan fights back and dumps Honky Tonk Man before Andre does the same to Sika. Andre dumps Sika before hitting a massive headbutt on Poffo to bust him open, followed by a quick elimination. Hogan fights back as Poffo is taken out on a stretcher with pools of blood underneath him. Things settle down a bit as the ring has cleared out a little. Bass gets eliminated by Hogan and Andre does the same to Mulligan.

Hogan dumps Volkoff as we’re just waiting for the clash of the titans. Andre gets rid of Blair before stepping on Koko’s face. Orndorff and Hercules (now minus the Hernandez) whip Hogan across the ring and HERE WE GO. Hogan runs right into Andre and the fight is on. A few right hands stagger Andre but Orndorff and Demolition come over to break it up. Hogan dumps Orndorff but a single headbutt from Andre is enough to knock Hogan out and stun the crowd. We stop for a slow motion replay with a focus on Andre’s sneer at Hogan on the floor.

After a break we come back with Hogan still leaving. Andre tells him to come back for more and literally swats Koko away without even looking at him. Brunzell quickly gets tossed but everyone left gets together and dumps Andre. Hercules dumps Tama and Ax is gone a second later. Smash tosses Jim out and we’re down to Smash, Hercules, Koko, Reed and Haynes. Koko dropkicks Reed out, setting up their Wrestlemania III match.

Haynes goes after Smash and Hercules stomps Ware down in the corner. Pure power dumps Koko and we’re down to three. A double clothesline puts Haynes down but he nails a clothesline of his own to eliminate Smash. Heenan gets on the apron for a distraction and Hercules puts Billy Jack out for the win.

Rating: D+. There wasn’t much good here but it’s rare to hear a crowd come to life like they did when Hogan and Andre went at it. It was clear that that match was going to be huge but I don’t think anyone realized just how big. Hercules winning is more of a footnote than anything else as the interest just died after the two big names were gone. To be fair though they wrapped it up in a hurry after Andre was eliminated.

Andre says it took eight men to eliminate him but it took one giant to get rid of Hogan. Heenan comes in and brags about Andre’s success before declaring him the next Heavyweight Champion of the World. Bobby never mentioned Hercules whatsoever.

Jake says he and Damien will always be at the top of the food chain.

Jake Roberts vs. King Kong Bundy

Roberts tries to work on the arm to start and Bundy runs from the snake bag. Things settle back down with Bundy going to a standing armbar but Jake kicks the knee out to escape. Bundy goes to a test of strength and easily takes the Snake down for some near falls, only to have Jake go right back to the knee to get out again. A front facelock has a more lasting effect on Roberts but Jake slithers out and drills Bundy with a knee lift.

Jake goes for the bag, only to have Bundy drag him back to the middle of the ring and Heenan steals the bag. We take a break and come back with Roberts walking down the aisle with the snake bag, making Heenan’s actions fairly pointless. Jake sidesteps a big charge and Bundy hits the buckle hard. Some right hands and clotheslines put Bundy down but the referee stops Jake from going for the bag, earning a knee to the ribs for the DQ.

Rating: C. This was much better than I was expecting until the fairly lame ending. Jake was so smart in the ring and even acted like a snake, right down to the slithering around. I was surprised by how good the chemistry was here, especially when the match was looking like a filler.

Jake plants Bundy with the DDT and tries to get the snake, only to be tackled by the referee. Vince: “Put the snake on the referee!” That’s exactly what Jake does because he listens to his boss.

We see crooked referee Danny Davis costing the British Bulldogs the Tag Team Titles back in January.

The Hart Foundation introduces Danny Davis as their official ringside observer, whatever that means.

Tag Team Titles: Hart Foundation vs. Dan Spivey/Tito Santana

The Harts are defending and Davis cost Santana his Intercontinental Title over a year ago in another questionable decision. Spivey is a tall guy who looks a lot like Barry Windham (so much that he replaced Windham when he left the US Express). He takes Neidhart down with a headlock to start but a big clothesline drops Spivey right back. Off to Bret vs. Santana, which should be awesome.

Unfortunately it only lasts a few seconds before Spivey comes back in for a shoulder. The Harts take over on Dan though with Neidhart dropping him throat first across the top rope. Bret chokes against the rope and gets two off a middle rope elbow. Off to a front facelock from Bret, of course drawing in Neidhart so the referee misses Spivey’s tag to Santana.

Bret misses a charge into Neidhart, allowing Tito to come in off the real hot tag. Santana cleans house with his flying forearm to both Harts before putting Bret in the Figure Four. The other two are still fighting though, allowing Davis to nail Santana with the megaphone to give Bret the pin.

Rating: D+. This was decent while it lasted but there was no way we were getting new champions here. Spivey wasn’t much of a partner as he couldn’t even neutralize the likes of Danny Davis. The tag division was about to take off and once the Harts started getting some better competition, they never looked back.

Ricky Steamboat says his fire is getting hotter and hotter, even if people go after his injured throat.

Iron Sheik vs. Ricky Steamboat

Savage comes out to yell at Steamboat before sitting in on commentary. Sheik uses the distraction to hammer Ricky down but the Dragon skins the cat and suplexes Sheik down. As Ricky slaps on a front facelock, Savage stays on a rant about how none of this would work on him because he’s the best in the world. A suplex puts Ricky down and Savage swears he would have gotten a pin right there. Sheik puts on an abdominal stretch but Steamboat hiptosses out and nails a top rope chop for the pin.

Rating: D+. The match didn’t have a ton of time but Savage’s commentary carried the whole thing. They’ve done a great job of keeping these two apart before they finally get to destroy each other in about two weeks. Savage’s commentary was great here as he can say all these things but we know he’s capable of backing them up. Fun match but not very good if that makes sense.

Savage and Steamboat yell at each other.

Hogan is distraught about the loss and says Andre cheated. He doesn’t actually say how but he swears it happened. Hogan thinks Andre must have cheated in every win of fifteen years, apparently because Hogan has never watched an Andre match. He has the big man upstairs in his corner and there’s no way Andre can beat him at Wrestlemania III.

Roddy Piper is retiring after Wrestlemania III and is humbled by having a tribute video made for him. Wrestling kept him out of jail when he was a kid, but he’s going to Hollywood to give it all he’s got. We see the tribute video, set to Frank Sinatra’s My Way, which really is an appropriate song.

The standard recap ends the show.

Overall Rating: D. This was one of the weaker shows in the series, but it’s only there to set up Wrestlemania III, which was already set in stone by this point. Piper’s tribute is good stuff, even though at least half the clips were from the previous Saturday Night’s Main Events. The company is about to explode even more than it already has and the next few months and years will be outstanding stuff.

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 28, 1994
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Jim Cornette

We’re still in the aftermath of Wrestlemania X and things almost have to be better this time around than they were last week. Granted I’ve said that before but it hasn’t been the case yet. The big match for the week is Lex Luger vs. Rick Martel so my hopes aren’t exactly at their highest. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Earlier today, Ted DiBiase bought some front row seats from fans for $100 each. Not the worst deal in the world when you’re a third of the way through the tapings.

Opening sequence.

Rick Martel vs. Lex Luger

Cornette goes into a rant about his microphone not working, somehow making that entertaining as well. Martel starts by hiding in the corner with Cornette saying that Luger is such a typical American. The threat of a right hand sends Martel running again (Dude, not in the face!) so Liger goes with a hiptoss instead, this time with Martel bailing to the floor. We look at the commentary table and it turns out that DiBiase is sitting behind them, counting his money of course. That’s the kind of thing that made him work so well and still does all these years later.

Lex’s headlock takeover as Cornette goes into a rant about how awesome the University of Louisville basketball team is this year. Well to be fair he’s supposed to be a heel. Martel fights up and is almost immediately headlocked right back down. Back up again and Martel gets knocked outside as we take a break. We come back with Martel getting in some kicks to the ribs in the corner and scoring off a clothesline.

The chinlock goes on because we haven’t spent enough time in a hold on the mat. Thankfully it doesn’t last as long….and Martel puts it right back on. Well of course he does. A snap off the ropes sets up the third chinlock as Vince says Cornette should have been the guest referee at Wrestlemania. That might have been even more perfect, just for the comedy alone.

Martel finally goes up but dives into a shot to the ribs. Luger tries a dropkick (!) but Martel grabs the rope and Luger crashes, mainly because HE HAS NO BUSINESS TRYING A DROPKICK. A suplex doesn’t get Luger very far due to his back so he goes with the right hands instead. The powerslam sets up the Rack to finish Martel.

Rating: D-. I know older wrestlers say there’s too much action today but then you have matches like this, with nearly half of the action on TV being spent in headlocks and chinlocks. You can call it psychology or whatever you want, but that’s not interesting to see or advancing any kind of a story. It’s laying on the mat and acting like it’s worthwhile. Once every now and then is fine but over and over is ridiculous.

Owen Hart says he can beat anyone.

Owen Hart vs. Mike Freeman

Yeah I’d say he’s included on that anyone list. The fans want Bret but we cut to DiBiase saying everyone has a price. Tonight he bought these three seats, but he’s got some surprises coming in the next few weeks. Back in the ring, Owen finally chokes Freeman on the ropes a bit and throws him down by the hair. That’s rather heelish of him.

Vince compares Wrestlemania to the Super Bowl and the boxing pay per views (ok fair enough in some cases) and Owen takes him down by the arm. A dropkick keeps Freeman in trouble as they’re taking their time with the squash here. Freeman charges into a boot in the corner and the Sharpshooter finishes him off.

Rating: D. A bit longer than it needed to be but the point was getting Owen on the show, which is the right idea after he beat Bret so recently. Just keeping him on TV makes sense, as you can tell he’s going to be in the World Title picture rather soon. Freeman was a pretty lame jobber though, as he was just kind of there without putting up even a token opposition. At least put in some effort.

Doink the Clown vs. Eric Cody

Doink squirts DiBiase with a flower on his way to the ring for a funny reaction. Cody is sent outside to start as this whole wrestling things seems to frustrate him. Cornette goes on an anti-New York rant as Vince wishes Reba McIntyre a happy birthday. Somehow they talk about her singing a song about Wrestlemania but don’t mention her singing America the Beautiful back at Wrestlemania VIII.

Doink pulls Cody down by the arm and Dink runs in to step on Cody’s chest. Cornette: “I can whip any midget and anyone under the age of 12!” Cody isn’t happy (as he shouldn’t be, as most clowns aren’t funny) so Doink takes the unhappy man down into an armbar. The Whoopee Cushion puts him out of his misery.

Rating: D. Face Doink was just such a mess as they went with the comedy instead of something interesting. To be fair though, you kind of knew that was where they were going at some point. Cornette was hilarious here though, with him going into the ranting and raving as only he could do. Well he and Bobby Heenan but that goes without saying.

Cornette brings in the Quebecers and Johnny Polo for a chat. Last week they were challenged by Captain Lou Albano….and here he is pretty soon after the champs arrive. Jacques: “What do you want Captain Crunch?” The challenge is accepted and Albano has a team. He leaves and comes back with the Headshrinkers and Afa, sending Johnny into a frenzy. Johnny: “Not those guys! They could beat us!”

The Quebecers were thinking more along the line of Men on a Mission or the Bushwhackers and Albano threatens them with the wrath of Jack Tunney if they don’t accept. More on this later, but the Headshrinkers are a good team so this should be fine. If nothing else, I’d pay to hear Polo and Albano yell at each other for ten minutes a week.

1-2-3 Kid vs. Black Phantom

The Phantom is masked and would be better known as Gangrel. Kid works a headlock to start but gets hiptossed for a break. The announcers talk about Rush Limbaugh’s salary as Kid snapmares him down for the running legdrop. The spinwheel kick gets two and the top rope spinning crossbody finishes the Phantom in a hurry.

Crush vs. Ray Hudson

Nikolai Volkoff is in the front row in his brown suit. Cornette spends the time quoting the Rolling Stones as Crush slowly chops away. A neck snap and a superkick allow Crush to strike some martial arts poses. There’s a gorilla press and a knee drop for the pin. For Crush that is.

Rating: D. Another boring squash in a series of them after Wrestlemania. Crush’s martial arts poses were the most entertaining things about the match, assuming you don’t include the Stones stuff. After the Savage loss, there wasn’t much left for Crush to do as he was really just a big lackey.

A highlight package takes us out. Did something just go short?

Overall Rating: D-. Egads they’re in a bad funk as the only good thing to be seen was Owen winning to continue his momentum. In theory they’re just waiting for the big stuff to happen but that doesn’t seem to be the case anytime soon. I’m guess Shawn Michaels and Razor Ramon are just getting a night off after the big ladder match, but you can really feel their absences.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 21, 1994
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage

It’s the night after Wrestlemania X and that means Bret Hart is the WWF World Champion again but his brother Owen is waiting on him. Owen pinned Bret completely clean last night, setting him up as the almost automatic #1 contender to the title. That could make for a very fun spring and summer so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Vince and Randy run down some of the card, including a Bret appearance. As it should be on the night after Wrestlemania.

Quebecers vs. Bushwhackers

Non-title and the first match after Wrestlemania. You know, because reasons. The Bushwhackers jump them while Johnny Polo is still conducting the theme song, giving us the required funny face. There’s a little too much whacking going on though as the Quebecers jump them from behind, only to have the Bushwhackers bite them on the pants. A pair of double clotheslines puts Jacques on the floor and Pierre down as we’re still waiting on any kind of tag match to break out.

Butch hits Luke by mistake as Vince apologizes for the ten man tag being cut due to time last night. Pierre hits Polo by mistake as well as things finally start to settle down to Butch headlocking Jacques. Luke comes in to do the same and it’s off to a quickly broken chinlock. A tag brings in Pierre, who gets pulled down in all of a few seconds so we take a break.

Back with Luke in trouble with Jacques slamming Pierre onto him for two. That means some trash talk from Jacques, who backdrops Pierre onto Luke for another near fall. Now why can Jacques throw Pierre around better than either Bushwhacker? Maybe he’s on the wrong team. Luke gets in…I think an armdrag to take Pierre down and the hot tag lets Butch come in for some house cleaning. The Battering Ram drops both Quebecers so Luke hobbles after Polo, allowing Pierre to knee Butch in the back for the pin.

Rating: D-. I was a big Bushwhackers fan back in the day but my goodness this was a chore to sit through. It’s kind of hard to get interested in one of their matches in 1994, especially against the Tag Team Champions. The ending wasn’t even anything special and it felt like it went on forever. The tag division was such a mess at this point and the Bushwhackers being the best option is all the proof you need.

Post match Polo says they can beat anyone so Captain Lou Albano comes out to issue a challenge for the titles from a mystery team. Sure, why not. Oh come on Johnny, act as smart as you are.

IRS gives us some reasons why people are tax cheats, such as they like to watch the national debt rise.

Tatanka vs. Chris Hamrick

Hamrick is semi-famous from the last few months of ECW. The announcers waste no time on getting into the news jokes of the week. Tatanka backdrops Hamrick to start and sends him into the corner for some chops. Hamrick gets sent outside for a crash and then gets pulled back in. Make up your mind Tatanka.

A suplex and powerslam connect as Vince talks about Michael Jordan playing baseball. Tatanka works on the arm because this just hasn’t gone on long enough yet. Some right hands give Hamrick some hope until he misses a charge in the corner, meaning it’s time to hit the warpath. The Papoose To Go finally finishes Hamrick.

Rating: D. Well, at least it was a little bit shorter. Tatanka seems to be ready for a push around this point, which is a little surprising after he already lost his undefeated streak last year. This was a pretty dull match and the commentators’ jokes didn’t exactly make things any better. But what else were they supposed to talk about?

Wrestlemania Report, again looking at the celebrities and the upcoming reairing.

Diesel vs. Ken Lucia

Joined in progress with Diesel hitting a flying clothesline (a big spot for him) and putting on a neck crank. The good looking side slam plants Lucia and it’s a Jackknife for the pin with one foot on the chest. Total squash, as it should have been.

Next week: Lex Luger vs. Rick Martel. Egads it’s almost hard to watch how far Luger fell.

Here’s Bret Hart for his first chat as champion. Vince recaps how he won the title and Bret admits that things didn’t start well yesterday but they certainly ended great. He’ll fight anyone, anywhere anytime, including Yokozuna. Ever the buzzkill, Vince brings up the loss to Owen but Bret has no excuses. It was just one match but Owen won it fair and square. Things are a bit different now because Bret has the title, which sounds like he’s up for a rematch.

Jeff Jarrett vs. Koko B. Ware

Normally I’d make fun of this for being the post Wrestlemania main event but they’re both in the Hall of Fame. An early hiptoss puts Koko down and Jeff is able to have a rest on the top. The fear of Koko flapping his arms (like a bird you see) sends Jeff bailing out to the floor. Back in and Jeff is smart enough (he is known to point at his head) to avoid a charge in the corner and a dropkick has Koko in more trouble. A suplex and clothesline drop Koko again but he avoids a middle rope elbow and starts the comeback. Koko hits an elbow for two and is almost immediately DDT’d for the pin.

Rating: D. Well what else were you expecting? Jarrett was hardly interesting in the first place and now you put him in there against Koko B. Ware? The country music thing wasn’t working and I think everyone knew it but that didn’t stop them from running with the exact same idea for YEARS. Oddly enough, it never actually worked. Who would have seen that coming?

Post match Jarrett gets in Jarrett’s face and it’s almost time to fight, complete with Savage waving his fists around like an 1890s boxing parody. Randy grabs for his foot and then gets inside for some right hands, sending Jeff running. Koko’s music plays and it’s so odd to see Randy celebrating to that song.

Ads for WWF Greetings On Call, where a wrestler can call and say something like Happy Birthday, Get Well or something similar. A video version of that could make a rather tidy sum today.

A quick preview of next week’s show wraps us up.

Overall Rating: F+. So the best things about this were…..I guess Diesel’s squash and Bret’s promo? If that’s all you have going for you on what should be on a pretty eventful show, you’re kind of in trouble. I know the Raw after Wrestlemania wasn’t quite the big thing that it would become but egads man. Could you give us something other than the Bushwhackers, Koko B. Ware and Michael Jordan jokes?

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: March 7, 1994
Location: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Ted DiBiase

We’re coming up on Wrestlemania X and that means things are starting to come together. The Hart Brothers are still at it but Bret and Lex Luger are both after the WWF World Title. It’s one of the best pay per views ever so it should be interesting to see to see how we get there. Let’s get to it.

We open with a quick recap of Randy Savage vs. Crush, the latter of whom teams up with Owen Hart to face the Smoking Gunns.

Opening sequence.

Ted DiBiase comes out for commentary and we run down the card.

Smoking Gunns vs. Crush/Owen Hart

They’re starting big this week. The fans are all over the villains here, so at least they’re doing their jobs. Nikolai Volkoff is in the front row as part of a story that would get rather dumb, mainly because it involves Volkoff in 1994. Owen goes outside to break some Bret Hart glasses and we’re ready to go. Bart and Owen exchange shoves and a hiptoss takes Hart down. It’s already off to Crush, who is greeted by the USA chants because the fans aren’t that bright.

Some shots to the back just send Bart up top for a spinning high crossbody and the tag brings in Billy. Crush, likely annoyed at….whatever is likely annoying him at the moment, throws Billy into the corner and hands it off to Owen. Just like earlier, this doesn’t go quite so well until a cheap shot from the apron lets him get in a suplex. The fans want Bret (I thought they were all about the USA) but have to settle for Crush hammering away at Billy in the corner as he ignores a tag request from Owen.

A side slam gets two and now it’s off to Owen for the always good looking missile dropkick as we take a break. Back with the hot tag bringing Bart back in for the backdrop on Owen and a right hand on Crush. Bart’s powerslam gets two as everything breaks down. Crush chop blocks Bart to break up what looks like a powerbomb and Owens slaps on the Sharpshooter for the win.

Rating: C. Not a bad match at all here as two of the biggest heels in the company at the moment get to beat a good team to really make them look better. The Gunns were scheduled for a ten man tag at Wrestlemania but really, it’s not like the match was going to mean anything in the first place. This was fine for what it needed to accomplish

Post match Owen asks Crush to save a little piece of Bret during their match at Sunday’s March to Wrestlemania. Crush says okey dokey.

It’s time for the Wrestlemania Report with Todd Pettengill with a focus on the celebrities. The matches get some attention as well, though I’m not sure why Todd thinks the mixed tag is mysterious.

Virgil vs. Jeff Jarrett

DiBiase isn’t exactly happy to see Virgil, who chases Jarrett into the ropes to start. A shoulder works a bit better for Jarrett but he gets taken down into a hammerlock. An armdrag sets up another hammerlock as the announcers make fun of the White House communications director. Virgil hits an atomic drop, which Vince calls a reverse piledriver. As I try to figure that out, Jeff grabs a DDT for the sudden pin.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here, though listening to DiBiase rip on Virgil three years after their split is still funny. Jarrett was still figuring things out at the moment in the WWF, which he never really pulled off. Virgil has to be about done with the company, though who would notice if he was gone?

Jeff Jarrett is on the cover of a country music magazine so Vince accuses DiBiase and Jarrett of being involved in fraud. Ok then.

The President of the Hair Club for Men is the official Wrestlemania hair consultant so we see what Mr. Fuji would look like with hair. Clara Peller was a better celebrity than this.

Doink the Clown vs. Mike Sharpe

Sharpe chases after Dink to start and gets kicked down. A shoulder lets Sharpe point at his head so Doink dropkicks him to scramble said huge brains. Some choking on the ropes slow Dink down as Vince manages to go on with one sentence about Wrestlemania for about a minute straight. The Whoopee Cushion (top rope seated senton) finishes Sharpe.

Chief Jay Strongbow and Chief Wahoo McDaniel and an actual Native American chief are in the ring to present Tatanka with an actual headdress. It’s kind of a cool moment and Tatanka gives a nice speech about respecting his ancestors and the men next to him. Strongbow says he’s proud of him and McDaniel (not McDaniels) says full steam ahead as Tatanka is actually crying as he has the headdress put on.

IRS vs. Mark Thomas

Before the match, IRS says Tatanka owes a gift tax on that headdress. Thomas has been around here before and is jacked. Vince takes this opportunity to talk about Cincinnati Reds owner Marge Schott and various other baseball stories. I don’t know if Vince wants to be a talk show host or what but this is really stupid. IRS takes him down with a snapmare but misses a charge into the corner so Thomas can roll him up for two.

That’s about it for Thomas’ offense as IRS slaps on an abdominal stretch. DiBiase: “I taught him everything I know.” IRS grabs the ropes, making DiBiase affirm that he did in fact teach IRS everything he knows. Now it’s time to work on the leg for a bit, followed by the jumping clothesline to finish Thomas. IRS is drenched in sweat after the match, likely because he wrestles in business attire.

Rating: D-. What else were you expecting here? IRS just wasn’t that good in the ring (fine, but not good) and watching him work a squash isn’t the most interesting thing in the world. At least they didn’t stay out there that long and beating someone who looked like Thomas was better than the usual schlubs that served as jobbers a lot of the time.

Jim Cornette and the Heavenly Bodies come out to rant about how Japanese cars are better than American cars to hype up Jimmy Del Ray vs. Lex Luger at the March to Wrestlemania. Speaking of Wrestlemania, Luger is only going to wrestle once at Wrestlemania and he’s losing to Yokozuna. As for Sunday and Del Ray, Cornette: “Luger, he’s going to hit you from so many different directions that you’re going to think you’re in a pinball machine and he just got an extra ball.” WHERE DOES HE COME UP WITH THIS STUFF???

Overall Rating: C-. The featured match being watchable is about as good as you can get around here and the rest of the show was only somewhat bad. Wrestlemania X is a special show and the build to it feels a little different as well. This wasn’t a great show and could have used more Bret, but at least what we got was pretty acceptable.

I’m not doing March to Wrestlemania and there’s no show on March 14 so the next episode is March 21.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Monday Night Raw
Date: July 12, 1999
Location: Freedom Hall, Louisville, Kentucky
Attendance: 14,573
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler

We’re coming up on Fully Loaded and that means we need a card, though I’d settle for things slowing down a bit so I can keep track of what’s going on around here. The shows are at their usual breakneck pace and that means very little can make an impact. Undertaker vs. Steve Austin is rolling along, though the battle over DX doesn’t have quite the same steam. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Austin to open things up with a contract in his pocket. His attorneys (Austin shouldn’t have attorneys) have drawn up a contract for a first blood match at Fully Loaded so Vince can come out here and sign it. Here’s Vince in a wheelchair, after having been in a car wreck on the Fourth of July. As you might expect, WWE doesn’t explain why he was fine last week on the fifth of July. Vince is hesitant to sign as he needs to pull out his glasses first. There’s something fishy here though so Austin has to sign it first.

That’s fine with Austin, though he wants back a certain piece of property: the Smoking Skull belt. Vince doesn’t seem to know what to do so violence is threatened. Before anything happens, Kane’s music goes off and Austin looks at the entrance, only to have Undertaker come up from behind with the Smoking Skull belt to the head. You can see Austin blading so the blood is flowing in a hurry. Vince pulls out a pen and has Undertaker fill it with Austin’s blood so the contract can be signed. Cool visual, if not a little over the top.

Post break Austin tells the medics to hurry up because he has stuff to do tonight.

Edge vs. Gangrel

Gangrel tries a cheap shot but gets punched down for his efforts. Some more right hands in the corner have Gangrel in more trouble so he bails to the floor, only to get caught with a baseball slide. Back in and Edge’s top rope hurricanrana is countered into a sitout powerbomb in a good looking landing. Gangrel hammers away as JR is doing a very solid job of pushing this as a battle of two people who actually matter. You don’t get that enough in modern times as the wrestlers are often ignored for the sake of anything else the announcers can do to waste time.

Gangrel gets two off a DDT and we hit the chinlock. That doesn’t last long as Gangrel goes up top so Edge catches him with a neckbreaker back down. A spear connects for no cover as Gangrel heads up the ramp, where the circle of fire is still on the stage. Gangrel actually wins the slugout and knocks Edge through the hole and that’s the match.

Rating: C-. This was actually a perfectly fine little match until the lame ending. My guess is this is going to set up some bad gimmick match involving fire and blood, but it’s a good sign that they’ve figured out to push Edge as the star of the team. The fans have taken to him and it’s a smart move to break up the trio and go with what is almost guaranteed to work.

Austin tells the doctor to get him fixed up because he has violence to tend to tonight.

Jesse Ventura will be at Summerslam.

DX’s music plays but we cut to the back where Road Dogg and X-Pac tar and feather the Fink for turning them into the cops last week. X-Pac talks about Billy Gunn and Chyna wanting the rights to DX, so they can come try to take it at Fully Loaded. Road Dogg isn’t happy either but here’s Kane (actually here this time) to cut them off. X-Pac gets straight to the point and wants to know what Kane’s deal is.

He’s letting Undertaker manipulate him again and if Kane is having anything to do with Undertaker, X-Pac is out. Cue HHH, Chyna and Billy Gunn to beat them down, drawing in Undertaker for the save. Undertaker gets in Kane’s face and says he’d never ask his brother to change. X-Pac isn’t sure what to think as Undertaker leaves. Kane walks halfway to Undertaker but stops without making his intentions clear. For this era, that’s putting the brakes on for a change and taking their time.

Godfather/Val Venis vs. Hardy Boyz

Godfather and Venis are challenging after costing the Hardys a match last night on Heat. Before the match, Venis says he’s like Mick Foley: hard to beat and never wanting to stay down. Val gets driven into the corner to start and Jeff takes his shirt off for his own hip swiveling. An atomic drop gets Val out of trouble and it’s off to Godfather for a Death Valley Driver into the Money Shot, drawing in Michael Hayes with a belt shot to the back for the DQ.

The Hardys pose on the ramp and get jumped by the Acolytes with Venis and Godfather making the save for no logical reason.

HHH, Chyna and Gunn say they’re the real DX and they own everything associated with the team. A six person tag is set up for tonight.

Tori video, featuring her disrobed on a bed with words like Passion written on her. Ok then.

Here are Jeff Jarrett and Debra for a chat. Jeff wants more respect from the fans or Debra and the puppies are staying in his doghouse. This brings out Austin, with a huge bandage wrapped around his head, for a Stunner to get rid of Jeff. Austin wants Undertaker tonight with no rules and no referee with anything going. Instead he gets Big Show, who says if Austin wants Undertaker, he’ll have to face Kane as well. Since that’s the case, Show might as well team up with Austin to fight the monsters. Austin seems cool with the idea and goes to leave so Jarrett gets back up, only to take another Stunner.

HHH/Chyna/Billy Gunn vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac/Kane

Actually hang on as there’s no Kane. HHH offers to let them walk right now if they give up the rights to DX but X-Pac isn’t going there. Instead, here’s a replacement.

HHH/Chyna/Billy Gunn vs. Road Dogg/X-Pac/The Rock

Well that works for a tag partner. Rock hammers away on HHH in the corner to start and runs him over with the clothesline. The jumping knee to the face cuts Rock off and HHH hammers away in the corner. Rock’s swinging neckbreaker gets him out of trouble so Gunn makes a save and knocks Rock outside. That means a beating for Rock on the floor because they’ve done enough wrestling here so far.

Back in and Gunn hammers away on Rock but the Stinger Splash misses. The beating continues, which is quite the odd idea as you would expect Rock to be the one on the apron for the hot tag. HHH comes back in for the sleeper and takes it to the mat to slow things down. Back up and Rock Samoan drops his way to freedom and it’s the hot tag to Dogg (kind of an odd choice) for snap jabs to everyone.

The pumphandle slam (with the hip thrusts that would get Dogg fired today) hits Gunn and Chyna gets punched in the jaw as everything breaks down. The X-Factor gets two on Gunn and the saving HHH is knocked to the floor. Rock is fine enough to hit the People’s Elbow for the pin on Gunn.

Rating: D+. Somehow that’s one of the best matches the show has had in a little while, mainly because of the (slightly) extended time the match received. It also helps having the bigger stars in there, but I can’t shake the feeling of barely knowing what’s going on. Everything moves so fast around here that even the bigger matches like this feel like they just come and go. That’s not good and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better anytime soon.

Droz is ready for an evening gown match, but first he has to wax his bikini line.

Undertaker is talking to Kane in the back.

Droz vs. Al Snow

Non-title and an Evening Gown match because that’s funny. Actually hang on as Snow wants this to be a HARDCORE Evening Gown match. How an Evening Gown match has DQ’s and countouts in the first place isn’t clear but neither is the sanity in this whole thing. Droz hits him in the head with some piece of metal and it’s already time for the table. The powder to the face gets Snow out of trouble….and there’s a breast lock. I’ll let you figure that one out as Snow finds tongs. One grab to Droz is enough for Snow to strip him for the win. I think this speaks for itself.

Post match, Snow caves his head in with a chair shot and then puts Droz through the table. We’re not done yet though as Prince Albert comes out with a hammer and drives a railroad spike into Head.

Earlier today, a very country sounding doctor tells Mark Henry that his blood pressure is 190/120.

Here are the Acolytes, who are scheduled to face Henry and D’Lo Brown, to call Henry and Brown cowards. They want replacements for a fight RIGHT NOW…and here’s Hardcore Holly. He says he’s the Big Shot as a fan tells them to “kiss and make love”. Holly slaps Bradshaw and the beatdown is on. The Acolytes destroy him with ease until Holly kicks the steps into Faarooq’s face. Cue the Big Show for a save and to carry Holly to the back, even though Holly says he had them.

On GTV, Joey Abs hits on Stephanie McMahon but gets shut down.

Test vs. Mean Street Posse

Gauntlet match. Test beats them up before the bell and drops an elbow on Pete Gas for the pin in what I’d presume is a hurry. Gas gets in a low blow before he leaves so Rodney comes in and gets powerbombed. The big boot and pumphandle powerslam finish Rodney so Joey is the last man in. Some shots in the corner are shrugged off and Test hits a powerslam, drawing in Shane for the brawl. Now it’s Steve Blackman coming to the ring to take Test apart as the match is thrown out somewhere in there, though it was much more a segment than anything else.

Ken Shamrock comes in to go after Blackman, who runs into the crowd. The Posse gets back up and wrap a chair around Test’s ankle. Stephanie runs in as well to go after Shane, who elbows her in the face by mistake. Shane panics and carries her to the back like Superman carrying Supergirl. You know that’s how they think of each other.

Back from a break and we look at Shane elbowing Stephanie, making it seem like she got shot.

Shamrock and Blackman fought even more during the break.

Undertaker says he and Kane are together again because blood is thicker than water. Speaking of blood, he’s busting Austin open and might even drink from the cut. Kane had his back to the camera and never said anything.

In something I’ve been waiting on, the COUNTDOWN TO THE MILLENNIUM clock appears. I would say it’s a big deal if you’re not familiar with it….but does anyone not know what that is?

Undertaker/Kane vs. Big Show/Steve Austin

The fight is on before Austin is here so you can imagine the chants. My guess would be WE WANT FISH but the glass shatters before I can be sure. Austin, who looks so strange with his head bandaged, chokes Undertaker on the ramp while the other two giants fight at ringside. As JR is in awe of Show’s hands, Undertaker throws Austin off the stage in a bump we don’t see. But did you know Show’s hands are like typewriters???

Austin gets backdropped on the floor and Undertaker hits him in the ribs with a lighting structure. Some choking puts Undertaker down but Austin takes him to the ring for the Thesz press. With Kane and Show nowhere to be seen (and they’re hard to miss), Austin unhooks a turnbuckle pad and hammers away with right hands in the corner. Everyone is back now and it’s Undertaker and Austin brawling on the floor all over again.

Show chokeslams Kane as Austin and Undertaker get inside as well with Undertaker breaking up a cover. Yes a cover, because they’re pretending this is a wrestling match. Kane pops back up with a wrench to Show’s back and it’s time for some double choking on Austin. There’s a chokeslam on Austin and the bandage comes off in the process.

That’s good for two with Show making the save so Undertaker chokes Austin some more. A chair shot misses though and Austin drops Undertaker but Kane beats him up in the corner. Austin is busted open again but snaps off a Stunner to put Kane away as Undertaker watches from the ramp.

Rating: C. I don’t know what this was as a match but it was an entertaining brawl and that’s what they were going for. Or given how insane this show has been for a long time now, you never can quite tell. The violence was good and they did a good job with Undertaker vs. Austin, though Show and Kane were just kind of there on the side. To be fair though, that’s the point of a tag match like this.

Overall Rating: D. I know this is the dark period you have to get through before you get to the great stuff next year but egads these shows are just hard to watch. It’s not so much that the shows are terrible (though they’re not great) but they’re just so all over the place with some dumb, dumb stuff (Droz vs. Snow jumps off the page) and stuff that feels like it’s just filler (Show helping Holly and then teaming with Austin?) that it’s hard to defend the things. They’re not the worst, but my goodness these things are such messes.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Survivor Series 2001
Date: November 18, 2001
Location: Greensboro Coliseum, Greensboro, North Carolina
Attendance: 10,142
Commentators: Jim Ross, Paul Heyman

While there’s a full card to go with the Survivor Series match, none of it matters compared to the main event. Some of the WCW and WWF Titles will be unified as well, which was a major problem at the time. There were so many belts floating around at the time that it didn’t matter when one would change hands. Thankfully a lot of those problems will be wrapped up tonight. Let’s get to it.

The opening video is a cool concept as it shows all of the old logos for the WWF over the years and a bunch of great moments in company history, set to a song called The End Is Here.

European Title: Christian vs. Al Snow

Christian is in the Alliance and defending. He greets his fans in South Carolina (that’s what he said) and calls himself awesome. Snow comes out to the Tough Enough (reality competition series where Snow was head trainer) theme which was quite a catchy tune. Snow takes him down to the mat to frustrates the champ. Christian comes back with a foot on Snow’s face in the corner followed by a Russian legsweep for two. We hit the chinlock as the match slows down.

Al fights up and hits his headbutts but Christian hits a tiger driver backbreaker for two. Snow gets rammed into the buckle and things slow down again. The trapping headbutts stop Christian again and Snow escapes the reverse DDT into a neckbreaker for two. Heyman schills for the Alliance guys in an always funny bit.

A sitout powerbomb gets two for Snow and now Christian’s reverse DDT scores for no cover. Instead Christian talks a lot of trash and gets rolled up for two. A top rope cross body is rolled through by Snow and the Snow Plow gets two. There’s the Unprettier out of nowhere to keep the title in the Alliance. That was quick.

Rating: C-. This is one of those shows where anything but the main event means nothing, which makes the first hour and a half of the show pretty uninteresting to sit through. That’s exactly the case here. This match was fine but it could have been on Smackdown on any given week. Snow and Christian are both good hands so a good match is really nothing too shocking.

Austin arrives and yells at the Alliance because he doesn’t like being accused of being a traitor to his team. This would be a lot better if Stephanie had more acting ability than say, a carrot. Austin yells at everyone on the team and says stop being paranoid.

Vince and Linda arrive with Vince brimming with confidence. Cole comes up and says this might be their last night in business but Vince doesn’t want to hear talk like that. Vince talks about taking calculated risks and being confident because someone is jumping to the WWF. Regal comes up and says he doesn’t buy the idea that Austin is jumping back to the WWF.

William Regal vs. Tajiri

These two are former friends. Regal hurt Tajiri’s (Japanese wrestler with a lot of fast kicks) girlfriend Torrie (not the same person with the same name but different spelling from years ago) on Smackdown to set this up. Tajiri is Cruiserweight Champion and was supposed to face X-Pac in a title for title match, but according to Commissioner Mick Foley, “No one cared about X-Pac or the Light Heavyweight Title anyway”. Tajiri fires off a kick but gets suplexed right back down.

The knee trembler takes Tajiri down but Tajiri goes after Regal’s knee with the kicks. There’s the Tarantula and Regal is bleeding from the nose. A handspring elbow gets two for Tajiri but Regal ties his head up in the ropes to stop the momentum dead. Regal tries a powerbomb but gets countered by another kick to the head. The Buzzsaw Kick misses and there’s the Tiger Bomb from Regal for the pin. Too short to rate but it was fine.

Regal powerbombs him again post match. Torrie (looking GREAT in a purple top and leather pants) comes out to check on Tajiri, only to get powerbombed as well.

We recap Edge vs. Test. These two are both midcard champions after the seemingly dozens of never ending midcard title changes going on at this point. Edge is US Champion, Test is Intercontinental Champion, tonight only one belt survives.

Test complains about the makeup lady not rubbing in the oil well enough on him. Stacy (his future girlfriend) comes up and agrees with Test. Test hits on her and she’ll think about it if he wins.

Edge compares himself to Test and says that there are a lot of similarities between them. The difference is that Edge hasn’t been dumped by every chick on the planet. Edge makes fun of Test for sounding wooden and that’s about it.

Intercontinental Title/US Title: Edge vs. Test

They fight over control to start with Edge taking over via a series of forearms to the head. Test powers him down and goes after the ribs with a wide ranging selection of stomps. We head to the floor with Edge being dropped across the barricade to further the attack on the ribs. Back in and Edge hits a dropkick to take over before we head outside again. They’re quickly back inside and a swinging neckbreaker gets two for Edge.

Test drops Edge onto the top rope ribs first to reinjure him and the taller of the blond Canadian champions takes over again. Test puts on a chinlock as the match slows down again. Edge fights up and avoids a corner charge before hitting a middle rope missile dropkick for two. A middle rope cross body misses though and Test puts him on the top rope.

Edge blocks a superplex with some CANADIAN right hands to the ribs but a sunset bomb doesn’t work. Test dives off the top but jumps right into a dropkick to put him down. The problem with this match is neither guy has been able to build up any kind of a run with the title as both have changed hands four times since the Invasion began about four months ago. How can you get behind either guy as a big time champion in that little bit of time? On top of that, Edge has been champion for six days and Test for thirteen. That’s not exactly Honky Tonk Man unifying with Luger in the late 80s.

Both guys are down now but it’s Edge up first with some clotheslines and a spinwheel kick. Test’s pumphandle slam is countered into the Edge-O-Matic for two. Test spears Edge down for two but the big boot misses. There’s the pumphandle for two but Test’s powerbomb is countered into a hurricanrana. Edge’s spear gets a close two but he can’t hit the Edgecution. Test tries a full nelson slam but Edge rolls through for the pin and both titles.

Rating: C+. This started pretty slow but it got going once Edge was able to start countering Test’s power stuff. In other words, Edge did the work to make Test’s generic big man offense look decent. This was probably the match of the night so far, which isn’t surprising given how hot Edge got in the next year.

Angle comes up to see a stressed out Stephanie. My goodness her acting is bad. I know I say that a lot, but IT’S FREAKING TERRIBLE. She says if the Alliance loses tonight, she’ll have to buy her own groceries and wash her own car. She can’t be a…..a…..a REGULAR PERSON!!! Angle reminds her that she’s special and doesn’t think Austin will jump.

A cage is lowered.

Jeff Hardy and Lita are talking about Matt Hardy being different lately. Matt comes up and yells at them for acting strange and not being focused enough. It turns into a rallying speech and things seem ok. The guys leave and Trish comes out of the same locker room Matt came out of earlier. Keep in mind that Matt is dating Lita at this point.

WCW Tag Team Titles/WWF Tag Team Titles: Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

In a cage. The Dudleys are WCW Tag Team Champions and the Hardys are the WWF Tag Team Champions and Stacy is STUNNING at this point as the Dudleys’ manager. All four belts get laid out between the guys in the ring and it’s time to go. You can win by pin/submission/both members escaping. There are tags required here and it’s Matt vs. Bubba to start. Matt can’t get anywhere so it’s off to Jeff who walks into a Boss Man Slam for two.

D-Von comes in as Heyman talks about Big Daddy Dudley, which JR could not care less about. Back to Matt who rolls D-Von up for two but walks into a reverse inverted DDT for two. Bubba comes in again and drops a bunch of elbows for two. The Dudleys tag in and out a lot and it’s back to Bubba for more punching to Matt’s ribs. Bubba tries to ram Matt into the cage but gets countered into a reverse DDT.

Off to Jeff who cleans house as everything breaks down. Poetry in Motion hits Bubba and Matt climbs but D-Von makes the save. There’s a Bubba Bomb to Jeff which should likely hurt Bubba as well. Bubba goes up again but Matt slams him down for two. Matt gets rammed into the cage but when the Dudleys try to do the same to Jeff, he grabs the cage and tries to climb out, only to get caught in a Doomsday Device (Paul: “WHAT A RUSH!”).

Matt gets crushed against the cage and Bubba whips D-Von into him for good measure. Bubba splashes him as well and the Dudleys are in full control. Jeff gets in a shot and Matt hits a top rope double clothesline to shift the momentum just as fast though. A DDT puts Bubba down for two and Jeff hits the legdrop between D-Von’s legs. A double backdrop takes Ray down again and the Hardys go up.

Matt hits a legdrop and Jeff hits a splash off the top at the same time for two on Bubba. Matt makes a climb but gets pulled down with one leg still stuck in the cage. What’s Up to Jeff and Bubba asks Stacy for a table. Stacy hits on Nick Patrick and picks the key out of his pocket. There’s a table in the ring now but Matt breaks up the 3D by jumping Bubba. Why D-Von didn’t flapjack Jeff through the table is anyone’s guess.

Bubba and Matt go tot he top and pound away at each other until Bubba is knocked down. Matt climbs down to escape but he’s left alone against the Dudleys. D-Von is rammed into the cage a few times and Jeff goes up as D-Von climbs onto the table for no apparent reason. Jeff looks down and sees D-Von there before diving off the top of the cage, but the Swanton misses. Bubba covers the table and therefore Jeff as well for the pin and the titles.

Rating: B-. This was the usual good brawl between these teams and it furthers the Hardys’ issues, but at the end of the day this feud was played out at this point. There was nothing left for these two teams to do and at this point it was being dragged out way too far. Still though, good match and a good way to I believe finally end this nearly two year long feud.

Jeff is taken out on a stretcher.

Mick Foley is at WWF New York and admits that his job (WWF Commissioner) means nothing.

Scotty 2 Hotty is about to be in the Immunity Battle Royal but Test beats him up to take his spot.

Immunity Battle Royal

Test, Billy Gunn, Bradshaw, Faarooq, Lance Storm, Billy Kidman, Diamond Dallas Page, Albert, Tazz, Perry Saturn, Raven, Chuck Palumbo, Crash Holly, Justin Credible, Shawn Stasiak, Steven Richards, Tommy Dreamer, The Hurricane, Spike Dudley, Hugh Morrus, Chavo Guerrero Jr., Funaki

I won’t bother explaining who all of these people are as most of them won’t be around again after this show. Some are from the Alliance and some are from the WWF but no matter who wins the main event tonight, the winner of this is guaranteed a job for a year. Stasiak is thrown to the floor before the bell rings and is apparently out. Test drops to the floor to hide as Tazz comes in late. Since it’s a battle royal there’s really not much to talk about here. Everyone punches everyone and no one is put out for awhile. Heyman freaks out about Tazz because Tazz choked him out on Smackdown.

Hurricane dives at Faarooq and is clotheslined out by Bradshaw. Albert throws Saturn out and Test, who is back in now, dumps Faarooq. Page is put out by someone we can’t see and Storm superkicks Palumbo out. Morrus and Chavo run in as wildcards because they tried to jump from the Alliance to the WWF on Raw but got fired as a result. Billy dumps Chavo as Morrus is eliminated as well. Tazz dumps Dreamer and Crash as Storm low bridges Spike out. Bradshaw’s clothesline kills Richards and he’s gone.

Tazz stops to run his mouth to Heyman and gets dumped by Billy. Test and Kidman put Albert out. We’re down to Bradshaw, Kidman, Gunn, Test and Storm. I’ve missed a bunch of eliminations but most of them weren’t shown. The fall away slam puts Kidman out and we’re down to four. Bradshaw kicks Storm down and might have hurt his ankle. Things slow way down as Billy and Bradshaw hang on for dear life. Storm and Test team up to put Bradshaw out but Test dumps Storm as well. A big boot eliminates Gunn and Test wins immunity.

Rating: C-. Not bad here but at the end of the day, it’s a battle royal so what are you expecting to get? Test would fall through the floor in the next year with no one caring about him at all. This was a pretty big batch of jobbers in there though and that doesn’t really make for an interesting match. Then again, neither do most battle royals.

Sacrifice video by Creed. This was a promotional campaign at the time, with highlight videos set to My Sacrifice by Creed.

Booker is worried about Austin jumping. Shane says it’s ok and stick with it.

Women’s Title: Trish Stratus vs. Ivory vs. Lita vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jacqueline vs. Jazz

Chyna relinquished the title earlier in the year without being pinned and then disappeared so this is the best we’ve got to pick from for the new champion. This is Jazz’s debut and the fans don’t seem to care. Why does no one care? Because Jazz meant nothing in ECW and was a face there but is a heel here. Mighty Molly is Molly Holly as a superhero. Jazz and Lita start things off with Jazz pounding away. Off to Jackie vs. Molly off some blind tags and somehow even fewer people care about Jackie.

Jackie dropkicks Molly down and it’s off to Ivory who gets caught in a sunset flip for two. This is one fall to a finish. Ivory slingshots Jackie into the ropes and it’s off to Trish for some forearms. Lita gets knocked to the floor and the three Alliance chicks (Ivory, Jazz, Molly) triple team Trish for a bit. Jackie double crosses Lita on Poetry in Motion and everyone hits their finishers on everyone else. The Litasault gets two on Ivory as Jazz saves. Lita gets backdropped to the floor and it’s Ivory vs. Trish left. Stratusfaction gives Trish her first title.

Rating: D. It was short, the match wasn’t any good, Trish looked great in the skin tight barely there pink shorts, Lita looked good as usual, and that’s all I’ve got here. As usual with situations like this, when the previous champion doesn’t lose the title, the new champion comes in at a big disadvantage.

Vince looks at Team WWF and gives them a pep talk, bringing up names like Dr. Jerry Graham, Peter Maivia, Gorilla Monsoon (pop) and Andre the Giant (BIG pop). He understands he might be looking at a group of losers, and if that happens no one will ever forgive them. After listening to that speech, I want to go fight three WWF guys and one guy each from ECW and WCW!

We recap the main event which has been summed up pretty well already. Vince was originally on the team but replaced by Big Show and Rock and Jericho are having major issues. Rock is WCW champion and Austin is WWF Champion. This really does feel like a huge match. The video is set to Control by Puddle of Mudd which fits really well.

Basically Vince said that he was tired of all of the Invasion (as were a lot of fans at this point) and offered one winner take all match with the losing organization going out of business. Angle joined the Alliance after the announcement but Vince says Austin is coming back to the WWF, giving the Alliance reason to be concerned. Austin stunned Angle on TV recently to further that idea.

Team WWF vs. Team Alliance

WWF: The Rock, Chris Jericho, Big Show, Undertaker, Kane

Alliance: Steve Austin, Kurt Angle, Booker T, Rob Van Dam, Shane McMahon

Everyone gets individual entrances so it takes forever to get to the start of the match. As those are going on, a few things to notice here: Team Alliance has one of the biggest WWF superstars ever, a guy that at this point had only wrestled in the WWF, a WCW guy, an ECW guy, and the then heir to the WWF throne.

Also, as goes the stereotype for the WWF, most of their guys are big and strong instead of the more athletic styles of the Alliance team. One other thing: JR keeps up one of the annoying inaccuracies in wrestling by saying that Undertaker won the World Title in his WWF debut. It was a year later, which you should know if you’ve read this far.

Rock and Austin start fighting before the bell and you know the early advantage doesn’t mean a thing in this one. Austin hits the Thesz Press and the middle rope elbow for a very early two. Rock comes back with a middle finger elbow of his own and dares Shane to get in. Off to Booker who gets clotheslined down for two as Shane makes the save. Expect to hear that line quite a bit. Off to Jericho as Heyman blames Vince for the end of ECW.

Van Dam and Jericho have a nice fast paced sequence with Jericho hitting a spinwheel kick for no cover. Jericho chops away but misses a dropkick, allowing Rob to hit the cartwheel into a moonsault for two. For reasons likely related to high levels of drug use, Van Dam tries a standing hurricanrana on Jericho, only to be countered into the Walls. Shane makes the third save of the match already and it’s off to Angle vs. Kane.

Angle gets thrown around but eventually slips behind Kane and hits a German Suplex for two. Kane comes back with a side slam and the top rope clothesline for two of his own as Shane saves again. Off to the Dead Man who pounds away but misses a charge into the corner, allowing Booker to get the tag. Undertaker immediately drops Booker and hits a legdrop, but Shane breaks up his fifth near fall of the match.

There’s Old School to Booker followed by that lifting wristlock which always looks painful. Off to a short armed scissors followed by a clothesline for two, resulting in ANOTHER save from Shane. Austin comes in to pound on Undertaker (and causing Heyman to say WHAT after everything JR says) but he gets caught in Old School. Say it with me: Shane makes the save. Undertaker gets caught in the wrong corner and quintuple teamed.

Angle is in next and tries to slug it out with the Dead Man for some reason. Undertaker escapes a German and DDTs Angle down. There’s the tag to Big Show and JR almost immediately bashes him, saying Show can make a huge difference, or he can make some huge mistakes. Show throws around RVD and Angle before clearing off the entire Alliance corner. Angle gets underneath Show and there’s the Slam followed by an Ax kick from Booker (and a Spinarooni) and a Five Star and a top rope elbow from Shane for the first elimination.

Shane dances around in celebration before turning around to meet The Rock who beats the living tar out of Shane with right hands in the corner. Off to Kane for a chokeslam, then a tombstone from Undertaker and a Lionsault from Jericho to tie it up. That’s the best way to go as Show and Shane were the weak links on both teams. Angle vs. Jericho now with Jericho hitting the forearm to start. A double underhook backbreaker puts Angle down but Austin saves.

Angle uses an amateur takedown and brings in Booker to slam Chris a few times. RVD gets a tag but one of his shoulders in the corner is countered into a sunset flip for two. Off to Kane who catches a punch from RVD. Van Dam’s comeback? Kick the guy in the head. Kane pulls Booker in and kicks him in the face too but the numbers game allows Van Dam to take Kane down and hit the Five Star. Rob takes too long to cover though and gets caught in a chokeslam, but Booker kicks Kane. Everything breaks down and Rob kicks Kane from the top for the pin to make it 4-3.

Undertaer pounds on Van Dam in the corner while everyone else is fighting on the floor. Austin and Angle get in as well and Undertaker has to fight all four guys at once. He gets them all in a corner and keeps charging at all of them with clotheslines in a cool sequence. Snake Eyes and a big boot take Angle down and there’s a Last Ride for him as well. Booker comes in with a chair but Undertaker boots him down, leaving himself open to a Stunner from Austin and the pin by Angle. That leaves us with Austin/Angle/Booker/RVD vs. Rock/Jericho.

Booker stomps on Rock but Rocky comes back with right hands. A side kick takes Rock right back down but Rock does the same with a DDT for two. Booker charges into a Samoan Drop for two as Austin makes the save. Rock whips Booker into Angle and grabs a rollup to eliminate Mr. T, making it 3-2.

Rob is in next but as he goes up, Rock kind of powerbombs him off the top for two. Jericho gets the tag and hits a running neckbreaker for two before chopping away in the corner. Van Dam avoids the Lionsault and kicks Chris’ head off, followed by the split legged moonsault for no cover. Jericho pops up and hits a Breakdown (Skull Crushing Finale) out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to tie it up at two each.

Austin slingshots Rock into the post on the floor while Angle and Jericho fight in the ring. Angle picks Jericho’s ankle and stomps away on him as Heyman thinks the Alliance can find a place for the Rock. Back to Austin to pound away on Chris and hit a superplex for two. Austin hits a kind of northern lights/belly to belly suplex for two and here’s Angle again. Jericho puts Kurt in the ankle lock but Kurt quickly escapes and hits a clothesline to take over.

It’s back to Austin for a suplex and an elbow to the face. Angle comes in and stomps away before it’s back to Austin who stomps away as well. We hit one of the few chinlocks in this match as Jericho is in trouble. Jericho fights up and it’s a double tag to bring in Rock vs. Angle with the Great One quickly hooking a Sharpshooter on Kurt for an even faster tap. Heyman LOSES IT in a great moment.

Off to Austin vs. Jericho with Chris trying the Walls but Austin rakes the eyes to escape. Austin can’t put Jericho in the Boston crab either but he gets the knees up to block the Lionsault. Steve loads up a superplex but gets shoved down, followed by a missile dropkick for Jericho for two. Austin counters a rollup out of nowhere for the pin and the elimination to get us down to Rock vs. Austin.

Rock hits a bad spinebuster but Jericho hits a Breakdown on Rock to take him down in a double cross. It’s not joining the Alliance, but rather just personal hatred. That gets two for Austin andUndertaker comes out to stalk Jericho to the back. Austin pounds away before launching Rock over the top and out to the floor. They fight on the floor with Austin being laid on the table and slapped in the chest over and over.

Austin comes back but gets sent over the announce table and punched in the face by Rock. Back in Rock chops away but gets caught in the whip spinebuster from Austin. Austin puts on a bad Sharpshooter and there’s your Montreal reference. Rock finally makes the rope so Austin grabs the WWF Title. Rock ducks the swing and puts Austin the Sharpshooter but he’s afraid to let go of the belt for some reason. I guess realizing he has a job no matter what, he grabs the rope instead.

Back up and Austin’s Stunner is countered into a Stunner from Rock. Why that puts Rock down after Rock had been in control for awhile is beyond me but whatever. Rock covers but here’s Nick Patrick to pull Hebner out. A Rock Bottom to Patrick is broken up and Austin Rock Bottoms Rock for two. Austin drills Patrick and pulls Hebner back in, only to be sent into him again as Rock counters the Stunner. There’s the Stunner to Rock but there’s no referee. Angle runs in and nails Austin with the title, letting Rock hit the Rock Bottom for the pin and the death of the Alliance. JR to Heyman: “You’re out of work! AGAIN!”

Rating: A. This felt like a main event and was very entertaining too. It runs forty five minutes bell to bell and feels like about half of that. At the end of the day, it was pretty clear what was going to happen but that doesn’t make it a bad match. Rock vs. Austin was pretty much done for a long time after this match, which is the right call as they had run it a lot this year. Great stuff here though.

Everyone celebrates and Vince comes out for the big dramatic pose, because this whole storyline was all about Vince and his kids.

Overall Rating: B+. Like I said, as goes the main event, so goes the show. The rest of the show isn’t bad but the main event is over an hour counting buildup video and entrances and all that jazz. The rest of the show isn’t bad at all with a good cage match and nothing truly bad that didn’t involve Trish looking great, so I can’t complain much here. Also, it gets rid of the Alliance which makes things better already.

As for the Invasion, I could go on at great length, but in short form: it was the biggest waste of time, money, and potential that there ever could be in wrestling. This was the biggest storyline you could possibly ask for and they BLEW IT. There are multiple options you could go with here. One idea is have no mention on TV of the WWF buying WCW and just keep it going with WWF guys in charge behind the scenes. Think a network might have been interested with it being under the direction of the biggest wrestling company ever?

Another option: have the Alliance win. At the end of the day any money they’ve got goes into the WWF’s pocket as they own EVERYTHING, so what difference does it make? Granted that was never going to happen with Vince’s ego, but why let money get in the way of Vince feeling good about himself? The Invasion could have been so much more but it wound up running about five months with the WWF dominating the whole way through. Such a shame and a loss for wrestling fans who had waited for so many years for a chance to have this happen.

Ratings Comparison

Christian vs. Al Snow

Original: C+

Redo: C-

William Regal vs. Tajiri

Original: C

Redo: N/A

Edge vs. Test

Original: B-

Redo: C+

Dudley Boys vs. Hardy Boys

Original: B+

Redo: B-

Battle Royal

Original: N/A

Redo: C-

Trish Stratus vs. Lita vs. Jacqueline vs. Ivory vs. Mighty Molly vs. Jazz

Original: D+

Redo: D

Team WWF vs. Team Alliance

Original: B

Redo: A

Overall Rating

Original: C+

Redo: B+

Like I said, as the main event goes, so goes the show. That’s apparently the case here as I liked both better the second time around.

Here’s the original review if you’re interested:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2011/11/10/history-of-survivor-series-count-up-2001-the-end-of-the-alliance-thank-goodness/

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the paperback edition of KB’s Complete 2003 Smackdown Reviews (also available as an e-book) from Amazon. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2018/09/07/new-book-kbs-complete-smackdown-2003-reviews/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6