Smackdown – May 23, 2014: A Tale of Two Zigglers

Smackdown
Date: May 23, 2014
Location: 02 Arena, London, England
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the second straight show in this building as we wrap up the European tour. As is usually the case with Smackdown, this is just a holding show until we get back to America to find out what happens to Bryan and the title. Other than that we’re likely to get a bit more on the Shield vs. Evolution match as we’re closing in on their showdown at Payback. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with Jimmy Hart, introducing Hogan to a WWE ring in England for the first time in over 20 years. Hogan says it’s great to be back here like in the old days. Speaking of the old days, Hogan talks about Jimmy not being the same since he started living in the Legends House. Hogan explains the show and lists off the bigger names in the cast. That’s about the past though and Hogan wants to look towards the future. The WWE Network is coming to the UK….at some point in the future. We’re already on the road to Wrestlemania XXXI and that’s about it.

We look at Shield vs. Evolution over the last few months.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Batista

No DQ after Batista hit Ziggler low last week. Ziggler nails a dropkick to start and chokes Batista on the apron. Big Dave comes back with a huge spinebuster for two and Ziggler is already in trouble. The first weapon is brought in as Batista gets a chair but Ziggler takes it away. That’s fine with Batista as he sends Dolph into the announce table and apron. Dolph sidesteps a charging Animal to send him into the barricade before clotheslining Batista into the timekeeper’s area.

We take a break and come back with Batista hitting the post with a chair. Dolph picks up the chair and blasts Dave in the back a few times to take over. Batista tries to walk away but gets forearmed in the back of the head and sent into the steps. Good brawl so far. Back in and Ziggler hammers away in the corner, making sure to wrap Batista’s arm around the ropes so he can’t hit Dolph low like he did last week. Nice job with the continuity.

Ziggler rolls through the spinebuster into a sunset flip and the Fameasser gets two. A baseball slide knocks Batista over the announce table and the announcers get knocked out. JBL: “Michael quit loafing on the job! Just because you got hit by everything!” Batista reverses a whip into the steps and slams Ziggler down onto the steps. Ziggler uses a low blow of his own to counter a Batista Bomb onto the steps but misses a running Fameasser off the apron onto the steps. Dolph’s knee is hurt so Batista throws him back in and nails the spear for the pin at 12:00.

Rating: B+. This was really good stuff with Ziggler being more than game against Batista. It’s amazing how different Ziggler is on the two shows. On Raw he can barely survive five minutes against Mark Henry but here he’s going toe to toe with Batista for a long TV match. The psychology was good here too and the power vs. speed formula was solid. I’ve always liked these two together and this was no exception.

Batista powerbombs Ziggler post match.

Bolieve! Tonight.

Nikki Bella/Eva Marie vs. Funkadactyls

Summer Rae is guest referee for the Total Divas special and is looking very good in the outfit. Nikki takes Naomi down with an armdrag to start as Cole tries to explain the stories on Total Divas. A facebuster puts Naomi down but Summer won’t count at all. The Funkadactyls hit a double suplex and a double split legdrop before Cameron is in on her own to no reaction. Off to Eva whose outfit matches her partner. Summer still won’t count, allowing Cameron to roll Eva up for a count that would make evil Teddy Long jealous and the pin at 1:58.

Eva glares at Summer post match.

Clip from the breast cancer rally with John Cena in attendance.

Bo Dallas vs. Sin Cara

Bo kneels in prayer before the match which JBL makes sure to point out. Before the match he talks about how we can all achieve our dreams if we just Bolieve. A quick armdrag puts Cara down and he jumps around in a circle to celebrate. They trade arm work with Dallas’ armbar being quickly broken. Dallas drives a knee into Cara’s face and a second one into the ribs. Sin Cara comes back with a flying headbutt and a springboard middle rope cross body. A Tajiri elbow gets two on Bo and a kick to the face drops him as well. Dallas avoids the Swanton and walks the corner for a bulldog and the pin at 3:35.

Rating: D+. Dallas isn’t great in the ring but he’s all mic work and character anyway. If they let him do stuff like he did in NXT and cut those WAY over the top promos he’ll have people booing him out of the building (in a good way) by the end of the summer. Good debut here but the promos are the key to his character.

Post match Bo helps Sin Cara up. “Keep trying. Maybe someday you can be like ME!”

We’ve got Wyatts in the ring. Bray says he’s seen the ups and downs of our world such as poverty and disease. When he closes his eyes he can hear us calling out to him. Most of us never have to see those horrible things, or only from our homes as we eat a bowl of cereal. Evil is real, even though we live in a bubble that is meant to be our home. We have become prisoners to society because that is what they want.

As soon as eyebrows are raised, someone like John Cena is sent in to be our hope and tell us that everything is going to be afraid. It’s our home and not a prison he says. Bray thinks Cena has lied to our children long enough. That’s why he’s been put here. Come gather around children and let’s have a look. We see a clip of the Family destroying Cena to end Raw. Back live and Bray says the Cenation has infected us like the Plague.

A simple ten count will get rid of everything Cena stands for and that’s why Cena has recruited the Usos to be his new pawns. They’ll be thrown on the front lines so Cena’s crown doesn’t get too dirty. Tonight Bray’s brothers will show the Usos that a beast that does not fear cannot be tamed. There are worse things in the world than dying. When your city burned, Bray was there. When your lives crumble, Bray was there. And when John Cena falls, Bray will be there. Bray says he’s always been and starts speaking in tongues. He drops to his knees and starts singing the song.

Sheamus vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title with Cesaro and Heyman on commentary. The bell rings and Cesaro offers to shake Sheamus’ hand, allowing Del Rio to get in a cheap shot from behind. Heyman and Cole argue over what language Cesaro should speak on commentary as Sheamus hammers away in the corner. Del Rio comes back with a snapmare and low dropkick for one. Cesaro speaks all of his other languages as Sheamus comes back with a knee drop for a near fall of his own.

The rolling fireman’s carry and a clothesline put Del Rio on the floor as the announcers are talking about Jack Benny. Del Rio comes back with a wicked running enziguri on the floor to take over. Back from a break with Del Rio being sent to the apron but snapping Sheamus’ throat across the top rope. Sheamus comes back with a knee in the corner but a Backstabber gets two for Del Rio.

The Irish Curse gets the same for Sheamus but both guys miss their finishers. A low superkick gets two on the champion but Del Rio misses a charge and gets caught by the ten forearms to the chest. Back in and Alberto grabs the armbreaker but Sheamus gets his feet in the ropes. Cesaro goes after Sheamus and gets kicked in the face. He interferes again and that’s a DQ at 9:31.

Rating: C. I really don’t get why Del Rio couldn’t take a fall here. The match was fine for the most part and one of their better matches, likely due to it not having as much time. There was also a chance that Del Rio could win a non-title match as opposed to beating Sheamus to become World Champion.

Cesaro Neutralizes Sheamus on the floor. Heyman claims self-defense.

We look back at Raw to see Stephanie demand that Bryan vacate the title next week.

Here’s Vickie Guerrero with something to say. She says people only know one side of her because she has great personal skills and is straight up gorgeous. She can also party with the best of them, so please welcome Adam Rose. JBL: “DON’T DO IT VICKIE! We need Glenn Close to get rid of that bunny!”

Vickie snaps her fingers to the music and smiles a lot. Rose has a very important question for Vickie: is she a lemon or a rosebud? The fans think Vickie is a lemon and a YES chant starts up to confirm it. Vickie tells him to get out but Rose tries to give her his lollipop. Rose scares her enough that she falls off the apron and is carried off by the party.

The Usos talk about Adam Rose for a bit before saying unlike the Wyatts, they’re a real family, back to when they were baby Usos playing in the sandbox. They bring in their brother from another mother, John Cena. Cena sounds like he’s imitating various people’s promos, such as Hawk (WELLLLL) and Hogan (“Let you tell me something brother”. Yes I meant to type it that way) and is a bit off at the same time.

He has some things he needs to put on his chest and he knows who makes the pants around here. Listen to him when he’s watching you because it’s time to put the dinner to bed and go hunting for babies. Jey: “We have no idea what you’re talking about.” Cena: “Maybe I do or maybe I do.” The point is anyone can talk but actions speak louder than words. They do that weird chest pounding thing as they walk away.

Usos vs. Wyatt Family

Non-title with Cena and Bray as seconds. Harper stands there with the blank look on his face so Jey shouts at him. Luke takes him into the corner but the Usos make a blind tag, allowing Jey to kick Harper into a sunset flip for two. Rowan comes in but gets chopped up against the ropes. The Usos make more tags to double team Rowan and Jey cross bodies him out to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Jimmy dropkicking Rowan down and stomping away but Erick easily fights back and brings in Harper. Luke gets kicked in the ribs but sidesteps a charging Jimmy to send him throat first into the middle rope. Back to Rowan for the knuckle skull crush as the fans are singing the song. Harper comes in again as the announcers argue over whether Bray said he was evil or not.

A superplex attempt is countered and Jimmy nails a Whisper in the Wind, allowing for the hot tag to Jey. Everything breaks down and Jey hits the running Umaga attack in the corner but gets kicked in the face by Harper. Harper goes to the floor and gets taken down by the suicide dive. Jey dives over the post to take out his brother and Harper at the same time. Back in and Jey loads up the Superfly Splash but Bray shoves him off the top for the DQ at 10:05.

Rating: C-. The match wasn’t bad but the DQ endings are getting annoying in a hurry. This does leave the door open for a rematch though and the titles can be on the line. It’s a power vs. speed match so I can’t complain all that much. I can’t imagine the rematch doesn’t take place at Payback.

Cena gives Rowan an AA and stares down Wyatt. Bray teases getting in but backs off to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This was the night of long matches but unfortunately two of them had weak finishes. The tag match I can excuse as it’s there to set up a rematch, but I see no reason why Del Rio couldn’t take a fall and have Cesaro do the same stuff after the match. Other than that the show wasn’t bad and advanced the stories for Payback. As awesome as it is, it’s kind of nice to get a breather from the Shield vs. Evolution feud for a night too.

Results
Batista b. Dolph Ziggler – Spear
Funkadactyls b. Nikki Bella/Eva Marie – Rollup to Eva
Bo Dallas b. Sin Cara – Corner bulldog
Sheamus b. Alberto Del Rio via disqualification when Cesaro interfered
Usos b. Wyatt Family via DQ when Bray Wyatt interfered

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: May 19, 2014

The show was in England this week and believe it or not, it actually made me want to see Payback.

Bray Wyatt opened Raw with another awesome promo, talking about how he’s going to end Cena’s fairy tale at Payback. He also went on about how a teacher told him he was evil but having the whole world in his hands is his redemption. His payback if you will. Cena ran out and hit a quick AA on Wyatt after outsmarting the Family. This was fine as Cena went at Wyatt physically instead of mocking him, which works far better.

I love Bray’s promos where he talks about his past and childhood because they’re just creepy and cryptic enough to make you wonder what in the world he’s talking about. It isn’t really clear and that’s why they work as well as they do. Bray isn’t the kind of character that should have his whole story fleshed out and it wouldn’t work at all if he did.

Cesaro beat Sheamus in a match that got on my nerves too much for two guys I like. At the end of the day, it’s the same story: have a guy beat a champion to set up a title match, because Cesaro beating up everyone on the roster isn’t a good enough setup or something like that. Think about it. Cesaro: “I’ve beaten up so many people lately that I’ve run out of people to fight.” Sheamus: “I’ll fight him.” No instead let’s have another champion lose to set it up instead.

The Beat the Clock Challenge was nothing special but I like it better than having someone beat Barrett. The matches were nothing to see because of time but RVD is an acceptable choice. The fans wanted Ziggler but Dolph losing to Barrett would have made them roll their eyes even harder so Van Dam was probably the best option out of the six.

Summer Rae returned (looking GREAT) to go after Layla for stealing Fandango. Again, giving the Divas stories is a good thing and we haven’t had women fighting over a man in awhile now.

Stephanie saying the title isn’t vacated but that Bryan will have to surrender it isn’t the worst idea in the world. You knew it wasn’t going to happen on a taped show when you thought it about of course. I don’t know how they’re going to fit a title match onto Payback with Monday being the last Raw, but Shield vs. Evolution would be a better main event anyway. Stephanie is AWESOME when she’s just being an evil jerk by the way. Her face when the fans chanted NO was great.

Rusev beating up 3MB was fine. Lana continues to be the real star of the act though.

Cena and the Usos pounding their chests was apparently from Wolf of Wall Street. I haven’t seen that yet so this was totally bizarre. The explanation doesn’t really help, but I’d prefer that over everyone pointing and pounding into my head that it’s from Wolf of Wall Street.

Speaking of Evolution vs. Shield, Rollins looked awesome against Batista. I’ve said it many times before, but power vs. speed is the best combination you can have in a match. Again, the key to this whole thing is Shield looks like equals against one of the biggest and most dominant factions ever. Having HHH interfere was a good idea as you don’t want either team jobbing before the big showdown.

Making the six man an elimination match is a good idea as well as it gives Evolution a chance to show that they’re better individually while keeping Shield looking strong. At the end of the day, any member of Shield losing to any member of Evolution isn’t a knock on them as losing to a former World Champion isn’t a step down for the most part. Making it no holds barred is even more awesome as it leaves the door open for a big showdown at the third show.

The Divas Champion lost as well because we need to push Alicia Fox all of a sudden. Why I have no idea, because AJ vs. Paige is coming soon enough. That was a really bad way to have Paige lose her first match, as Fox is a former champion but not a memorable one. It’s hard to put into words but there’s a difference between someone like AJ being a former champion and Fox being a former champion if that makes sense. It’s like saying Paul Orndorff and Hulk Hogan are both in the Hall of Fame. In that sense they’re equal, but being realistic it’s not even close.

The Adam Rose segment was awesome as the fans were way into his character. Him beating Swagger is better than running through 3MB or whatever he was going to do. I don’t get why WWE allegedly looks at him as a failure, as I’ve liked him since he debuted.

Harper vs. Cena was the usual good match between these two. WWE has done something very good with Wyatt vs. Cena: they have a match where neither guy could conceivably lose. I can’t picture either guy staying down for a count of ten, meaning (as long as it’s not a draw) that we’re in for a surprise at Payback. I could have done without the cliched knockout and count to ten ending though.

Overall Raw was a good show as they focused on other stuff to make us forget that there isn’t an active World Champion at the moment. Shield vs. Evolution is a very hot feud and Bray vs. Cena can be if they play their cards right. The PPV has a chance of being awesome if they don’t screw things up, which I’m somewhat optimistic that they won’t. Good but not great show this week.

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Smackdown – May 9, 2014: The Hangover Edition

Smackdown
Date: May 9, 2014
Location: First Niagara Center, Buffalo, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

After Monday dealt with the fallout from Extreme Rules, which was fallout from Wrestlemania, we get to deal with the fallout from the fallout here on Smackdown. The main story at the moment is Evolution laying out Shield to end the show, meaning we’re likely setting up Evolution vs. Shield II at Payback. Also Daniel Bryan has gone from a monster at Wrestlemania to Laurie Strode about a month later. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the battle royal where Sheamus won the US Title, last eliminating reigning champion Dean Ambrose. This transitions into a recap of the main event where Evolution helped the Wyatts defeat Shield and beat down the Hounds of Justice post match.

US Title: Sheamus vs. Dean Ambrose

No Rollins and Reigns outside this time. Dean is favoring his ribs or arm coming in but takes Sheamus down to start. The champion counters into a headlock takeover followed by a running shoulder. Cole is already playing up Sheamus getting the title through less than fair measures, even though he won the match though totally fair and legal means. Sheamus cranks on the arm but Dean fights back with that kind of running Thesz Press of his.

They head outside with Sheamus ramming Ambrose into the announce table but getting suplexed onto the floor. Sheamus comes back with a rolling fireman’s carry as we take a break. Back with Dean fighting out of a full nelson and hammering away at Sheamus’ head. Sheamus goes shoulder first into the post and out to the floor, setting up a great looking suicide dive from Dean. Back in and we hit the Figure Four, which is some pretty lame psychology after Sheamus’ shoulder hit the post and barricade about twenty seconds ago.

The champ gets to a rope and comes back with the Irish Curse and a Cloverleaf. Another rope is grabbed and Dean heads to the apron, setting up the ten forearms to the chest. A big kick to the chest sends Dean into the ropes but he explodes out with a clothesline to put both guys down. Back up and the Brogue Kick out of nowhere sends Ambrose to the floor. Ambrose dives back in at nine, only to take a second Brogue Kick for the pin at 8:19 shown of 11:49.

Rating: C+. Again, I don’t see why this is supposed to be the start of a heel turn for Sheamus. He won the title in a match that is about everyone being in the ring at the same time where the announcers talk about how you have to watch your back. Then he beats the former champion clean with his finishing move. That sounds like one man being better than the other, not one man cheating to win. If that’s where they’re going, then hopefully Sheamus starts doing some heelish stuff instead of the turn being forced because the script says that’s what happens.

Rob Van Dam/Big E. vs. Bad News Barrett/Cesaro

Van Dam has a big black eye and Heyman is on commentary. The Bad News for the week is that climate change is coming and soon people like Big E. are going to be forgotten pieces of history. Barrett hammers on Van Dam to start but gets caught by the springboard kick to the face. Bad News puts on a chinlock as Heyman talks about Brock beating Undertaker. Another kick puts Barrett down and it’s a double tag to Big E. and Cesaro. Big E. takes over with the usual and gets two off the splash. A Rock Bottom out of the corner gets the same but Van Dam accidentally kicks Big E., setting up the Neutralizer for the pin at 2:38.

We look at stills of Bryan vs. Kane from the PPV.

Rusev vs. Kofi Kingston

Just Rusev now. We get another pro-Putin rant from Lana before the match, saying he should win the Nobel Peace Prize. Kofi fires off some kicks to start but gets crushed by a jumping kick to the face. A dropkick staggers Rusev and Kofi hammers away with right hands in the corner, only to have his sunset flip countered by a choke. The cross body gets two on Rusev but Kofi slams him down and hooks the Accolade for the win at 2:06.

The Wyatts come on screen with Bray talking about how the world must crumble because we’re all just slaves to judgment. Judgment tells him he must adapt and it is judgment that says he must bow to Cena. But where we’re going, no one ever comes back.

Bolieve!

Layla/Fandango vs. Santino Marella/Emma

Santino takes Fandango down with a headlock to start but the dancer slams him down. He takes too long dancing on the middle rope though and misses a knee drop, allowing for a double tag to the girls. There’s the Dilemma to Layla and everything breaks down. Emma loads up the pink Cobra but the guys fighting allows Layla to roll her up for the pin at 2:06.

Fandango and Layla kiss on stage.

Roman Reigns vs. Mark Henry

We get an inset interview from Henry saying this is about revenge for Shield attacking him 3-1 a few months ago. Points for continuity. Henry throws Reigns into the corner a few times before winning a slugout by going for Roman’s bad ribs. Mark talks a bunch of trash about how Reigns is by himself tonight and you can hear JBL cover up a laugh. He bends Reigns’ bad ribs around the post as this is one sided so far.

As I say that, Reigns comes back with the jumping clothesline to put Henry down for the first time. Roman tries another charge but runs into a clothesline from Mark. Henry loads up what appeared to be a Vader Bomb but Reigns lifts him onto his shoulders and plants Mark with a Samoan drop. The spear is enough for the pin at 3:45.

Rating: C-. This was a nice mini story with Reigns fighting through adversity and going into Beast Mode to win in the end. That’s the kind of win that makes Reigns look like a monster who isn’t going to be stopped and that’s exactly what he needs at this point. It’s not a masterpiece and was just a quick match but it was nice to see.

3MB vs. Los Matadores/El Torito

It’s Slater/McIntyre for 3MB here along with Horny. McIntyre clotheslines Fernando down for two to start before stomping away. Off to Slater as the big guys start tagging in and out to work over Fernando. JBL drops a Bastian Booger birthday greeting of all things as Horny comes in for some shots of his own. 3MB keeps up the tags until Fernando scores with a dropkick to put both guys down.

Horny: “TAG ME IN! I WANT TO RIP HIS FACE OFF!” Both small guys get tags and Torito starts biting, only to get punched in the jaw for his efforts. The Gore puts Horny on the floor but only seems to tick him off. Slater won’t tag in for some reason but does break up a pin attempt off a splash. Heath comes in legally but misses a charge, allowing Torito to hit a moonsault press for the pin at 4:23.

Rating: D+. The match was nothing to see but that’s become the standard for this feud. Speaking of nothing to see, did Los Matadores fall into a hole for the second half of the match? I’d assume they were fighting with the other full sized guys but the camera didn’t catch much of it if they were. This feud has run out of steam though.

Long recap of Bryan vs. Kane on Monday.

Mr. T. wishes us a Happy Mother’s Day.

Batista vs. Seth Rollins

This has potential. Rollins is banged up as well with a bad arm and misses a charge into the corner to start. Another missed charge sends Rollins to the floor and Batista ties him up in the ring skirt for a beating. The fans tell Batista he can’t wrestle before he pulls Rollins away from the ropes for a big crash to the mat. Back outside already with Seth going into the steps.

We hit the chinlock for a few moments before Batista goes after the bad arm by wrapping it around the post. Batista tries to pull Rollins out of the corner again but Seth backflips (mostly) to his feet. Big Dave misses a charge of his own and goes shoulder first into the post, allowing Rollins to hit some running forearms in the corner. A running sleeper slam from Rollins sets up the standing Sliced Bread #2 but Batista gets away.

Seth scores with an enziguri from the apron but misses the top rope knee to the head, only to run into the spinebuster. The Batista Bomb is countered and now the running knee sends Batista down to the floor. Seth goes up top for a dive, only to be sent face first into the announce table for the countout at 8:55.

Rating: C+. Give this another five minutes and it’s a far better match. This was another good sign for the Shield as Rollins can clearly hang in there with a big star in a longer match. He reminds me of a Jeff Hardy in the ring with all of the dives and it’s easy to get behind his comebacks.

Post match Batista lays Rollins out with a Batista Bomb.

Wyatt Family vs. Usos/John Cena

Cena runs over Rowan to start and scores with a quick release fisherman’s suplex. Harper comes in for one of those freaky looks of his so Cena takes him down with a bulldog. Off to Jey for some shots to the face before Jimmy comes in for some running shots in the corner. Luke comes back with a right hand of his own and it’s off to Rowan who walks into a Jimmy punch. Harper comes back in to take over on Jey with catapult into the middle rope for two.

Bray is legal for the first time and chokes even more as this isn’t the most energetic match in the world. Wyatt does the Spider Walk out of the corner but Jey kicks his arm away in a nice counter. A low bridge puts Bray on the floor but Harper breaks up a tag attempt. There’s the Gator Roll followed by a chinlock before it’s back to Erick for a headlock.

Jey shoves him into the corner and avoids a splash, finally allowing for the hot tag to Jimmy to face Bray. Cena gets in a cheap shot from the apron as Jimmy superkicks Harper down for two. Bray and Rowan double team Cena but Jimmy dives on all three of them. He goes back inside though and eats the discus lariat from Harper for the pin at 8:18.

Rating: D+. The match was fine from a technical standpoint but there was no energy to this at all. It felt like a dark match or the main event of a house show at the end of a long tour. Most of it was just punching and variations of chinlocks with no real big saves and almost nothing from Cena at all. I expected more from this one but it does advance the Family vs. Usos down the line.

Overall Rating: D+. This wasn’t much of a show as it’s really just a supplement to Raw, which wasn’t a great show in the first place. It’s cool to see the Shield wrestling on their own and they didn’t perform horribly, but the rest of the show really didn’t do anything for me at all. It’s really just a long set of matches that don’t change anything and won’t matter by the time Monday comes around.
 

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Monday Night Raw – May 5, 2014: Just Play The Halloween Theme Already

Monday Night Raw
Date: May 5, 2014
Location: Times Union Center, Albany, New York
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Extreme Rules has come and gone and most of the stories have advanced. First and foremost, Bryan kept the title away from Kane in a brawl reminiscent of the Attitude Era but it looks like a rematch is imminent. Other than that Shield defeated Evolution in a war and Bray Wyatt escaped the cage to beat Cena. The main stories tonight are a twenty man battle royal for the US Title and Adam Rose debuting. Let’s get to it.

US Title: Battle Royal

Dean Ambrose, Goldust, Cody Rhodes, Mark Henry, Titus O’Neal, R-Truth, Kofi Kingston, R-Truth, Heath Slater, Sheamus, Curtis Axel, Ryback, Dolph Ziggler, Big Show, Sin Cara, Santino Marella, Fandango, Zack Ryder, Jack Swagger, Damien Sandow

Ambrose is defending and all of his challengers come to the ring at the same time. It’s the traditional big mess to start with Show throwing out Woods and Henry dumping Ryder. Truth is thrown out by someone we didn’t see as everyone else is just having random brawls. Ziggler finally loses his shirt but makes the mistake of hammering on Big Show. Santino slides back into the ring and fails to help Sin Cara eliminates Titus. Big Show dumps Titus with ease and does the same to Sin Cara with the masked man landing on all of the other eliminated guys. Why they were still at ringside isn’t explained.

Fandango gets Dolph over the top but not out to the floor as the brawling continues. Sheamus does the ten forearms to Sandow for an elimination and we take a break. Back with Big Show and Mark Henry being ganged up on in opposite corners. Heath Slater appears to be the only elimination during the break. Henry and Show shrug everyone off and have a showdown ending with a chokeslam to Henry. A Brogue Kick staggers Big Show though and everyone comebines to dump him out. They do the same to Henry and both giants are gone.

Kofi is sent to the apron but jumps back in, only to be kicked out by Ambrose. Dean gets Fandango as well but has to deal with Swagger. Ryback and Axel dump Cody and Goldust to get us down to seven: Ambrose, Santino, Sheamus, Ryback, Axel, Swagger and Ziggler. Scratch Dolph actually as Santino Cobras him out but is quickly dumped by Ryback and Axel, leaving us with five. Sheamus starts cleaning house but runs into a spinebuster from Ryback. The Goldberg chants start up and Ryback has blood on his teeth.

Axel and Ryback take control but can’t toss Dean out. The fans chant for Punk for no apparent reason as Dean backdrops Axel to the floor and wins a slugout with Ryback on the apron to get us down to three. Swagger tries for a cheap shot but Dean slides back in. Ambrose gets behind him and dumps Jack but turns around for the Brogue Kick. The elimination is academic and Sheamus is champion at 15:49.

Rating: C. This was probably the best way to get the title off Ambrose save for the cliched triple threat or fourway match. He’s got the record for longest reign by a WWE US Champion so it’s not like he didn’t get to do anything with the belt. Also this is something for Sheamus to do once he’s back so it’s good for everyone all around. It also didn’t come off as any sort of a heel turn which it wasn’t supposed to be.

Rollins tries to calm Ambrose down by saying it wasn’t fair but here’s HHH to interrupt. He talks about how lucky Shield got last night before announcing a six man tag with Shield vs. the Wyatts later tonight.

After a break Sheamus says he’s been spinning his wheels since he came back. They say every stopped clock is right twice a day and tonight was the perfect time for the Celtic Warrior to step back into glory. Renee asks him if he has a message for Dean Ambrose. Sheamus says no hard feelings.

We get stills from Bryan vs. Kane last night.

Daniel is with Brie in the back when Stephanie comes in. All Daniel did last night was anger Kane and make him capable of unspeakable acts of violence. Therefore, Bryan has to stay in this locker room until his match later tonight. She shuts the door and Kane’s mask is on the back.

Rob Van Dam vs. Cesaro

Feeling out process to start with Van Dam taking over with a quick armdrag. A headlock slows RVD down and a back elbow to the jaw gets two. Rob comes back with a quick kick to the face and Rolling Thunder sends Cesaro to the floor. Back in and Cesaro gets in a few more shots but another kick sends him outside for a big old flip dive.

A moonsault off the apron sets up a slingshot legdrop for two back inside. The fans think this is boring thirty seconds after all the high spots from Van Dam because wrestling crowds have the attention span of drunken gnats. Now it’s a CM Punk chant as Cesaro hammers away and sends Van Dam to the floor with a clothesline. We come back from a break with Van Dam fighting out of a chinlock and the fans chanting for him for a change.

A sunset flip gets two for Van Dam but he gets caught by a jumping double stomp of all things. Van Dam gets another two off a small package and rollup but he dives off the top into an uppercut for a pair of near falls. Cesaro nails him with an awesome looking running uppercut in the corner followed by some rolling gutwrench suplexes for two. Back up and Van Dam can’t hook a monkey flip out of the corner but runs into an elbow to the jaw. He goes up top but gets caught in a one legged tree of woe. Cesaro goes to the floor to hammer away at Van Dam’s head but does it too long for a DQ at 12:00.

Rating: C+. The match was fun and I actually like the ending. Van Dam was getting dominated so it doesn’t make Cesaro look bad and shows a more aggressive side to his character. Those rolling gutwrench suplexes are just awesome and his match against a big name is going to rock.

Cesaro hammers away even more until Heyman pulls him off. Van Dam looks totally out of it.

Bray Wyatt says that Abigail told him that he was born to lead and would change the world one day. This world we live in has an evil about it and everyone refers to him as a piece of trash or a nobody. Those people have made it a glorious day because last night, Bray Wyatt became somebody. Last night Cena’s fear was personified by a singing child and we get a clip showing just that. Bray talks about how a child has personified Cena’s fear. John thinks that Bray is spreading nothing but lies and just wants to watch the world burn.

The second part is right because he wants a new world to be reborn in his image. Wyatt is doing this for the homeless man sitting on the side of the street, for the teenage girl who woke up crying because she was called too ugly to be the prom queen and for every fan sitting in this arena. From this day forward, John Cena stands alone and alone he shall fall. The children shall stand will Bray Wyatt and they’ll never be alone again. He’ll be remembered for what he truly is: a god.

Ryback vs. Cody Rhodes

We see a clip from the battle royal that shows Cody accidentally eliminating Goldust. Cody starts fast and sends Ryback to the outside before hammering away in the corner. Ryback takes over with a hot shot before choking on the ropes to keep Cody in trouble. A delayed vertical suplex gets two on Cody and a hard whip into the corner puts him down again.

We hit the chinlock for a bit until Ryback misses a splash. Cody takes out the knee and hits a running knee to the chest for two. The Disaster Kick looks AWESOME, followed by a good looking springboard missile dropkick. Goldust goes after Axel but the distraction lets Ryback pull Cody off the top into Shell Shock for the pin at 6:00.

Rating: D. This was a really dull match as the always annoying “let’s have two guys lose every match they’re in and then wonder why no one cares about them at all after it’s over” trope continues. This match just kept going and I was really bored after about two minutes, especially when the ending was obvious.

The lights go out in Brie and Bryan’s locker room. A small fire lights up with Kane’s mask over it. The newlyweds leave and run into Stephanie, who offers to have Brie’s car brought up. I’m sure this won’t end badly at all.

It’s time for a Cinco De Mayo celebration with Los Matadores and Torito. They have your usual Mexican decorations and Torito throws out candy to the fans until 3MB interrupts. They want a truth but demand that only English is spoken. Drew threatens violence if the truce isn’t accepted and a brawl breaks out. Slater gets left alone and shouts OLE, only to be thrown to the floor. Torito puts Horny in an airplane spin as JBL shouts out boxing references.

Bolieve!

Kofi Kingston vs. Alexander Rusev

Before the match, Lana praises Vladimir Putin and Edward Snowden, saying America’s secrets are safe with them. Rusev runs Kofi over to start and tosses him down with an overhead belly to belly suplex. Kingston comes back with a dropkick and spinning crossbody for two but misses a kick to the chest, allowing Rusev to load up the fall away slam. Kingston lands on his feet though and tries the springboard cross body, only to be caught in mid air. Now the fall away connects and the Accolade makes Kofi submit at 2:50.

The Network is now available on XBOX One.

Brie gets into the car as Bryan looks around. He gets in to leave and of course there’s a camera in the backseat. Stephanie knocks on the window to scare both of them and says Bryan’s match is right now. If he doesn’t wrestle tonight, he’s stripped of the title. Thankfully Daniel has a brain and has Brie come with him to the ring.

Daniel Bryan vs. Alberto Del Rio

Non-title. Daniel fires off kicks in the corner to start before opting for some right hands to the face. He charges into the tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two though and Del Rio takes over. Another USA chant starts up as Bryan fires the kicks in the corner. He backflips over Del Rio and actually slips on the landing. Thankfully JBL is paying attention and says it’s because he’s worried Kane might attack him. The YES Kicks have Del Rio in trouble but he grabs a Backstabber for two. Daniel heads outside and gets sent into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Bryan fighting out of a chinlock but walking into a German suplex for two. Alberto starts goinga fter the arm and mocks the YES post, only to dive into a forearm for two. They head outside with Bryan being dropped face first onto the barricade. Back in and Del Rio lowers the knee pad for the superkick (not sure what sense that makes) but Bryan ducks and lands a hard kick of his own.

A drop toehold sends Alberto into the middle buckle and they trade kicks with Del Rio taking over. Bryan gets dropped with a big old kick but headbutts out of a superplex. The Swan Dive gets two and the running dropkicks knock Del Rio to the floor. FLYING GOAT sends Del Rio halfway into the stands but he comes back with an enziguri for two. The armbreaker is esily countered though and Bryan uses something like La Mistica to set up the YES Lock for the win at 15:32.

Rating: B-. This is the kind of stuff they should use to main event shows like Payback or another low level show. Instead of using the same matches over and over again, just let Bryan tear it up with some upper midcarder for about 25 minutes a month. Good match here with Del Rio going kick for kick with the champion.

Post match Kane’s pyro goes off so they run to the back. Brie and Daniel get in the car but it won’t start. Daniel checks the engine and plugs a wire back in. He shuts the hood and of course Kane is in the back of the car. Bryan fights Kane and tries to leave again but Kane gets on the back of the car. Daniel floors it to drop Kane on the concrete (off camera of course) but stops and looks back. Kane sits up so Bryan gets back in and drives off.

Intercontinental Title: Big E. vs. Bad News Barrett

Barrett is defending, having beaten Big E. for the title last night. Before the match, Bad News says the fans are going to need some cosmetic surgery for their new champion. Big E. runs him over to start and the fight is quickly on the floor. Barrett is rammed into the apron and a spear puts him into the steps before they just beat the count back inside. The champion goes right back to the floor but avoids a charge to send Big E. shoulder first into the post.

Back with Barrett still in control and getting two off Winds of Change. A hard knee to the face puts Big E. down again and here comes the Bull Hammer. You know it’s not working that quickly though so Big E. runs him over to put him in the ropes. The spear through the ropes puts both guys on the floor and it’s Big E. up first. The Big Ending is countered though and Bad News rakes the eyes. Bull Hammer retains the title at 10:48.

Rating: D+. Not much to see here as it was just the required win in the rematch to establish that Barrett is the better man and get rid of Big E. for awhile. It wasn’t a very good match though as Big E. started doing stuff he didn’t do while champion and it makes it easier to beat him, as is tradition in wrestling.

Cena will respond to Bray Wyatt on Main Event.

We look at the battle royal earlier.

Here’s a special Mother’s Day message from Mr. T. which is comprised of remixed clips of his Hall of Fame speech and Brodus Clay’s dancing bridge club from Wrestlemania XXVIII.

Swagger and Colter come out with a sign saying Zeb’s Deportation List. Colter says today isn’t Cinco De Mayo because it’s May 5. He doesn’t like all the foreigners coming into WWE and has a list of all the people he wants gone. It’s only a partial list: Cesaro, Heyman, Emma, Santino, Paige and Sheamus. Colter does the Emma dance and says it’s poisoning the youth of America. They’re interrupted by the Adam Rose party, complete with BUNNY. The entire party is here to carry Rose to the ring just like in NXT. The fans are singing the tune of his song too so it’s working.

Rose has a sucker in his mouth and holds it out to Colter. Zeb holds up a hand but Adam grabs him by the moustache. “Don’t be a lemon. BE A ROSEBUD!” Swagger runs at him but gets kicked in the face and backdropped to the floor. The party gets back in the ring and Zeb looks terrified before running off.

Wyatt Family vs. Shield

It’s a big fight to start and the bell rings with everyone on the floor. Ambrose and Rowan get things going with Dean taking over in the corner. Off to Rollins who gets thrown out of the corner, allowing for the tag off to Harper. Dean makes a blind tag to help Rollins with a double suplex and two on Luke. Roman comes in and hammers away before it’s quickly back to Rollins for a top rope shot to the arm.

Harper takes Seth into the corner to take over again and it’s off to Bray for some hard right hands to the head. Rowan can’t slam Rollins down and gets caught with an enziguri, allowing for the tag off to Dean. Ambrose hammers away and nails a cross body, allowing him to get even more hard shots. Dean cleans house and takes Rowan down with a shoulder before slapping on a Figure Four. He lets it go so we can have a standoff and take a break.

Back with Harper holding Ambrose in a chinlock. Dean fights up with a jawbreaker but it’s off to Rowan to whip Dean from corner to corner. Rowan is sent to the floor and the now legal Harper gets the same treatment. Seth hits a running dive to take them both out but stops to go after Bray, allowing Harper to shove him to the floor in a scary crash. Harper follows it up with a suicide dive, sending Rollins over the table.

Back in and things settle down again before it’s off to Bray for a running splash in the corner. Harper slams Rollins down for two more as everything breaks down. Rowan and Wyatt throw Dean onto the announce table before leaving him alone. Rollins knocks Harper off the top rope and hits the top rope knee to put both guys down. A double tag brings in Reigns to hammer on Wyatt and hit a series of the running clotheslines.

 

The Family breaks up the Superman Punch and it’s double dive time to send Harper and Rowan onto the table. Now the Punch connects and it’s Triple Bomb time but here’s Evolution. That’s fine with Shield as they kick the Wyatts onto Evolution and hit more double dives, only to have Bray run Roman over and hit Sister Abigail for the pin at 18:04.

Rating: B-. It’s a good match but it has to compare to the match these guys had at Elimination Chamber. The ending gives us a reason for Shield to keep fighting Evolution, hopefully in some singles matches instead of another six man. It’s a good main event but more about the stories than the match.

Evolution goes after Shield post match and this time their comeback is stopped. A string of finishers ends the show, including a Triple Bomb to Reigns.

Overall Rating: C. The more I think about it, the more seeing Bryan vs. Kane again makes me want to pound a rusty spike into my eye. If it’s going to mean another month of really bad segments like this one then I’m very glad I have the Network to give me something entertaining to watch instead of this nonsense. We get it: Kane is a monster who is going to lose in the blowoff match because that’s what he’s done for like 15 years now. The rest of the show was solid but that segment gets stupider and stupider every time I think about it.

Results
Sheamus won a battle royal last eliminating Dean Ambrose
Rob Van Dam b. Cesaro via DQ when Cesaro wouldn’t stop attacking Van Dam in the ropes
Ryback b. Cody Rhodes – Shell Shock
Alexander Rusev b. Kofi Kingston – Accolade
Daniel Bryan b. Kane – Yes Lock
Bad News Barrett – Big E. – Bull Hammer
Wyatt Family b. Shield – Sister Abigail to Reigns

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Smackdown – May 2, 2014: An Honest To Goodness US Title Match!

Smackdown
Date: May 2, 2014
Location: Sprint Center, Kansas City, Missouri
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

We’re two days away from Extreme Rules and everything is set up. WWE has been doing a good job of getting things ready for the show and making me care about the matches, which is something they should have been doing for years when the shows weren’t ten bucks a month but that’s a different story. Anyway, the main event tonight is Ambrose defending in a 3-1 handicap match against Del Rio, Ryback and Axel so let’s get to it.

 

The opening video talks shows HHH taking credit for Shield’s rise to the top but maybe he gave them a bit too much power. This transitions into a clip of their brawl that ended the show with Shield standing tall. The match on Sunday should rock.

The handicap match is now a fourway.

Sheamus/Usos vs. Wyatt Family

This has potential. Sheamus is here after losing to Bray on Main Event thanks to the Family. The Usos made the save so here’s a six man to continue the story. Jey starts with Harper and gets two off a quick shoulder before it’s off to Sheamus for power vs. power. They slug it out with Sheamus taking over until it’s off to Rowan who rams Sheamus into the corner. Back to Luke for another slugout with Sheamus taking over via the rolling fireman’s carry. A knee drop gets two on Harper but Harper comes back with a hard shot to the jaw.

Rowan comes in but misses a charge, allowing Sheamus to nail a knee lift. A cross body of all things puts Rowan and Sheamus on the floor and a staredown takes us to a break. Back with Bray getting the tag to work over Sheamus in the corner. Wyatt runs Sheamus over and crawls along the mat in the eerie way that only he can. Back to Erick for a knee drop followed by a good looking superkick from Luke for two.

Harper knocks an Uso off the apron but walks into the Irish Curse to put both big guys down. A hot tag brings in Jimmy to speed things up and Harper takes a Samoan drop. Jimmy nails an enziguri to Harper and some shots to the face put Rowan and Wyatt on the floor. The Whisper in the Wind misses though and Harper nails a Michinoku Driver for two. Everything breaks down and Sheamus lays out Rowan with the Brogue Kick. In all the confusion, Bray makes a blind tag and plants Jimmy with Sister Abigail for the pin at 7:44 shown of 11:14.

Rating: C. Nothing wrong with this as the Family gets a win and the Usos are pinned in a six man rather than the usual tag match. I’d assume this sets up Harper/Rowan vs. Usos, potentially at Extreme Rules, which would be an acceptable title match given how weak the division is for the most part anymore. Nice opener here.

Post match the Usos dive on the Family but Bray lays them out. Sheamus tries to fight all three monsters but the numbers catch up with him. The Irishman is thrown into the steps and taken down by Luke’s discus lariat.

Adam Rose is coming on Monday. “Next stop, Monday Night Raw! Come along! I HAVE BUNNIES!”

It’s time for the contract signing for Torito vs. Hornswoggle with Vickie running things. 3MB and Los Matadores are here as well and Slater says Horny has some demands. First off, he wants 300 mini green M&Ms and 3MB’s greatest hits playing for his training sessions plus 10 copies of Rudy on Blu-Ray. Torito interrupts him and yells in Spanish with Diego translating: “If you mess with the bull, you get the horns.” Vickie says she wants to keep this night and short and cackles at her joke. Horny signs but Torito doesn’t have hands.

Instead they put ink on his hoof and slam it down onto the contract. Horny says he’ll prove he’s the bigger man and moves his chair up a bit. Torito cranks his even higher so Hornswoggle gets a booster seat. They both get on the table and shove each other before a pose off begins. The brawl is finally on and Horny gets gored down onto Mahal. Los Matadores clear the ring and Torito uses the table as a launch pad to dive onto the Band. Yeah this went long, but at least they’re playing it as totally goofy which helps a ton.

Jack Swagger vs. Rob Van Dam

The triple threat on Sunday is now an elimination match. Before the match Cesaro comes out with his new music that sounds like the start of Attitude Era Raw. Swagger uses the distraction to go after Van Dam as Heyman jumps in on commentary. An early Vader Bomb gets two for Jack and a belly to belly gets the same. Van Dam is sent to the floor and gets kicked in the face by Swagger but Cesaro grabs Jack’s foot, allowing Rob to hit a quick kick and the Five Star for the pin at 1:52.

Post match Cesaro Neutralizes Van Dam.

Bolieve!

Alexander Rusev vs. R-Truth

Lana has her hair down for a change as she rants about America invoking sanctions against Mother Russia. Rusev takes Truth into the corner and fires off a series of kicks to the ribs before getting caught with a side kick to the face. Rusev falls to the floor but is able to punch Woods out. Truth dives over the top but gets caught in the air and thrown back inside. Woods comes in for the DQ at 1:04. This was the second time the match took place for what was likely a reshoot.

Truth and Woods clear out Rusev a few times post match.

Here’s Daniel Bryan in the neck brace with something to say. Thankfully he’s brought the titles with him this week. Daniel says he’s the same as all the fans right here in Kansas City. They come together and overcome obstacles every day. They also take care of their families and that’s everyone’s number one priority. This Sunday, with a lot of faith, determination and heart, he’s going to walk into the Extreme Rules as champion and he’s going to walk out as Champion.

Kane put him in this neck brace and put him in pain but none of that matters because Kane put his hands on Daniel’s wife. This is more than personal now because it’s a war. On Sunday Bryan will send Kane home by any means necessary and if that means Bryan goes out with him then so be it.

Kane comes on screen in the mask and says Daniel is making that sounds like a bad thing. When he and Bryan arrive in the devil’s home together, he’ll give Bryan a tour. We get a preview of it in the form of a Kane highlight video, showing him injuring Bryan over the last few weeks. Kane promises to show Daniel the depths of his depravity and gives an evil laugh.

Bolieve!

Dolph Ziggler vs. Damien Sandow

Damien is still dressed like Magneto. Cole asks JBL to tell us about Magneto and we get a somewhat in depth character biography. Sandow even has the helmet (hood) on as Ziggler takes him down with an armdrag. A Stinger Splash in the corner sets up a neckbreaker on Sandow followed by an elbow drop for two. Damien comes back with a flipping neckbreaker for two and an armbar that Cole calls the Magnet. The Wind-Up elbow connects but Ziggler hammers away. We stop for Magneto to use powers but since there’s no metal on Ziggler, he nails a dropkick and Zig Zag for the pin at 3:23.

Rating: D+. Sandow was destined to become a comedy character so I can live with this for the most part. Thankfully Dolph didn’t sell the magnetic powers stuff, putting him one step ahead of anyone who ever solid Little Jimmy. It’s almost hard to believe that Sandow was Mr. Money in the Bank less than a year ago.

Video on Paige vs. Tamina.

Big E. vs. Titus O’Neal

Non-title. Big E. muscles him to the mat before leapfrogging over Titus. He runs O’Neal over with ease and kicks him to the floor with one foot. Titus LAUNCHES Big E. over the announce table and then throws him on top of it for good measure. Back in and Titus hammers away in the corner before putting Big E. over his shoulder for a kneeling backbreaker. O’Neal chokes away and that’s a DQ at 2:16. Great way to make me believe in Big E. going into Sunday.

Post match Big E. destroys Titus and whips him into the announce table a few times. He stands over Titus in the ring which I think is supposed to make us think he’s ready for Sunday.

Video on Wyatt vs. Cena, including clips of the Wrestlemania match and the segment on Monday.

A record is playing the children singing on Monday and Bray calls it beautiful music. Those children pulls Cena’s soul out of his body and handed it over to Bray. He believes that the children are the future and they trust him more than Cena. When Bray climbs out of the cage on Sunday, he’s taking the children with him. That’s going to leave him an old bitter man all alone. Follow the buzzards.

US Title: Dean Ambrose vs. Alberto Del Rio vs. Ryback vs. Curtis Axel

One fall to a finish with Dean defending and Shield banned from ringside. The challengers all go after Dean to start but he jumps on Axel with no reservations. A 3-1 beatdown puts Dean on the mat with ease though and Curtis asks where Dean’s buddies are. Dean’s comeback is easily stopped and he’s thrown to the floor, allowing Axel to grab a rollup on Alberto for two. Ryback and Axel get in an argument and Dean comes back in to hammer on Axel. Ambrose is thrown back to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Ryback and Axel hammering on Alberto in the corner. Del Rio’s Backstabber gets two on Ryback but Axel makes a quick save. The fans are behind Ambrose as he saves a cover by Axel on Del Rio. Ryback and Dean go to the floor so Axel can dropkick Alberto down for two. A bad looking tilt-a-whirl backbreaker gets two on Curtis but Dean is back in to break it up and go after Ryback. Ambrose hammers on Del Rio and BLASTS Ryback in the face before low bridging him out to the floor.

The running dropkick puts Alberto down but Axel gets in a cheap shot to take the champion down. A Perfectplex is countered and Dean comes back with a hard clothesline for two of his own. Ambrose is sent to the floor and the Perfectplex gets two on Del Rio. Del Rio ties Axel up in the ropes for a top rope double stomp for a VERY close two and Ryback takes Curtis down with the Meat Hook by mistake. The armbreaker goes onto Ryback but he lifts Alberto into the air for the Shell Shock. Axel saves that pin but Dean slides in for a cradle on Curtis for the retaining pin at 10:04 shown of 13:34.

Rating: B. Take four guys and let them go for a lot of fast pins for a good while. This is one of the formulas that is hard to screw up and it worked well here too. Making it a fourway was a good call as it’s really hard to buy that Ambrose could win in a handicap match here. I can’t imagine he keeps the belt much longer though as he’s already got the WWE record with the thing.

It’s a triple team post match but Reigns and Rollins come in for the save and stand tall to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. There were some issues in there but this was a good Smackdown for the most part. We got focus on everything with Evolution vs. Shield getting the least focus, which is the right idea after it was the top story on Monday. Bryan vs. Kane is looking better and better every week and some of the false finishes could be very good. Solid show this week and Extreme Rules is looking solid.

Results
Wyatt Family b. Usos/Sheamus – Sister Abigail to Jimmy Uso
Rob Van Dam b. Jack Swagger – Five Star Frog Splash
Alexander Rusev b. R-Truth via DQ when Xavier Woods interfered
Dolph Ziggler b. Damien Sandow – Zig Zag
Big E. b. Titus O’Neal via DQ when Titus wouldn’t stop choking
Dean Ambrose b. Alberto Del Rio, Curtis Axel and Ryback – Cradle to Axel

 

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Smackdown – April 25, 2014: Marvel Wishes Their Shield Was This Awesome

Smackdown
Date: April 25, 2014
Location: Giant Center, Hershey, Pennsylvania
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield

Things have started to pick up for Extreme Rules with Kane attacking Daniel Bryan on Monday and Shield throwing down the gauntlet to Evolution. Other than that we have a lot of the card set or obvious as we head into whatever they’re calling PPVs now. Hopefully something actually happens tonight. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Vickie Guerrero to open things up. She says the Authority has the night off and will be giving the Shield a match against eleven people tonight. We’ll get to that later though because it’s now time for the great debate between Paul Heyman and Zeb Colter, accompanied by their respective clients. Zeb goes first and thanks everyone for allowing this to happen but wants to talk about the night after Wrestlemania when these two men attacked him with a change of plans. He says no one knew Cesaro’s name ten months ago when he came to Colter for help. Time runs out as Colter talks about everything he did for Cesaro.

Heyman’s response mainly consists of talking about Brock Lesnar breaking the Streak. He goes on about 15 times with the same statement and the crowd eats it up. Colter: “SHUT UP!” Heyman: “I can’t shut up because if I do, you might not know that my client Brock Lesnar conquered the Streak at Wrestlemania.” When Paul’s time is up, Colter talks about Heyman lying all the time and owing everyone money.

Colter: “Why did you steal Cesaro?” Heyman: “Because I’m the 1 behind the 1 in 21-1 when Brock Lesnar conquered the Streak.” Heyman says Cesaro was already a Paul Heyman Guy when he won the Andre battle royal, which he repeats about 10 times as well. Colter says that’s a lie and turns over his podium. This is between the two of them and Colter wants Heyman to be a man. “I’d be happy to look at you like a man but we’re one man short grandpa.” The managers are about to go at it and are split up as we take a break.

Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger

I’m surprised this wasn’t saved for the PPV. Cesaro shoves him around to start and hits a running uppercut in the corner followed by another to drop Swagger in the corner. Jack sends him out to the floor, only to have Cesaro ram him into the barricade to take over. Swagger fights out of a chinlock and grabs a belly to belly suplex followed by a double arm trap. Cesaro easily powers up and hits a spinning springboard European uppercut to wake up the crowd a little bit.

Jack will have none of that and slams Cesaro down, setting up the Vader Bomb for two. Both guys fall out to the floor and we take a break. Back with Swagger trying to run the corner but getting knocked down for a top rope European uppercut and two. Jack comes right back and tries the Vader Bomb but has to settle for the Patriot Lock when Cesaro raises a boot. Cesaro is quickly out but gets caught in a slam for two. A tiger bomb puts Swagger down and the fans want the Swing. They get what they want and the Neutralizer is good for the pin on Swagger at 8:44 shown of 12:14.

Rating: C. This was better than I was expecting it to be with Swagger continuing to be decent in the ring while working his formula but getting beaten in the end. Cesaro getting a clean win isn’t a bad thing at all, especially when it’s what should be the big blowoff to the story. I’m not sure what Cesaro does at Extreme Rules now though, unless it’s a rematch which isn’t something we really need to see.

Post match we have….Shield? Cesaro leaves as the trio circles the fallen Swagger and the beatdown is on. Swagger takes the Triple Bomb and Ambrose says HHH told them to adapt or perish. Apparently Jack Swagger failed to evolve. Reigns says they’re just getting started.

We look at Bryan being taken out of the arena on Monday. Cole says Bryan had a neck contusion and is already getting better. Bryan will be on Raw Monday.

The same video about Paige from Raw is shown again.

Tamina Snuka vs. Natalya

Natalya easily takes her down into a leg lock to start and hits a bad looking dropkick. Tamina comes back with a kick to the chest to knock Nattie outside and an elbow to the back gets two. The Samoan drop gets a big pop but Natalya rolls away before the splash. Tamina kicks away from a Sharpshooter but gets caught by a discus lariat for two. Natalya springs up from the mat and gets kicked in the throat for the pin at 4:05.

Rating: C-. Better match than I was expecting here until the kick at the end was botched. Tamina is decent enough in the ring to be a first victim for Paige on Sunday and hopefully Paige can have a better match than the messes she’s had over the last few weeks against people like Aksana.

We recap Evolution vs. Shield.

Shield lays out 3MB in the back.

Vickie is on the phone with presumably HHH and is told to take the night off to be replaced by Brad Maddox.

Curtis Axel vs. Jey Uso

Nothing wrong with the singles matches to set up the Tag Team Title match. A quick elbow drops Jey but Axel gets caught in an early chinlock. Curtis shoves him throat first into the ropes and hits a running knee to the face to knock Jey into the corner. Axel drops a running elbow for two but misses a charge into the corner. Jey comes back with some quick strikes until Axel rams him face first into the buckle a few times. The neckbreaker into a cutter is good for the pin on Jey at 3:40.

Rating: D. Very basic match here but it was only kind of interesting. The problem here is Axel and Ryback have won like two tag matches and are now the #1 contenders because they’ve cleaned out most of the division in that winning streak. It amazes me how the division can go from hot to this in a matter of months, but it’s what happens when you have teams beat each other at random and don’t let two teams get built up.

Video on the Saudi Arabia trip.

Bolieve video.

Here are the Wyatts with something to say. The spotlight shows a cage around the ring and Bray starts talking about how love determines the power you have. Love is a wildfire with beautiful flames and a fine wine that brings warmth to those who drink it. You have to live it and feel it to know it’s real. Cena needs to get the people to love him so they’ll do anything for him and that’s exactly what he’s done.

Now he’s lost their love though and Bray loves his style. On Monday Cena’s people put him in a three on one handicap match like a piece of meat being thrown to the wolves. Bray’s words are razor blades and they’re working just like he planned for them to. He and Cena have a date with destiny at Extreme Rules and the cage will define their world.

All the blood, sweat and tears Cena has shed to fight for the people has led them here, trapped in a box like a rat with a snake. Bray lays on the middle rope and says Cena’s nightmares have become Bray’s dreams come true. One by one the fans will all follow Wyatt, who says he can see them from the top of the cage. Bray starts singing and the fans join in to complete the awesome segment.

Wyatt Family vs. Cody Rhodes/Goldust

Cody starts by dropkicking Luke’s leg out before it’s off to Goldust to hammer on Rowan. A bulldog drops Erick again and it’s back to Cody as the brothers start working on the arm. Rowan slams him into the mat and Bray gets on the mic to ask if the fans are impressed by what they see. Harper catapults Cody’s throat into the middle rope before it’s back to Rowan to crank on the neck.

Bray is yelling at the fans as Harper puts Cody in the Gator Roll. Rhodes finally fights up and hits the Disaster Kick to bring in Goldust off the hot tag. Goldust dives on both Wyatts as everything breaks down. Harper rolls Goldie up for two but gets caught in a powerslam for another two. Cody goes up top but Luke sends Goldust into the corner to knock Cody to the floor. The discus lariat is good for the pin on Goldust at 5:07.

Rating: D+. It’s nice to see the Wyatts getting back to what made them awesome and I’m ok with the Rhodes Brothers wrapping up their run as a team. There’s nothing left for them to do, but it does make me think the Outlaws’ reign was completely worthless and the titles should have gone from the Brothers to the Usos.

Shield takes out Brad Maddox.

Santino Marella/Emma vs. Fandango/Layla

No match as Shield jumps Fandango and gives him the Triple Bomb off the stage through some tables. That should write him off TV for awhile.

Adam Rose is coming.

We look at Bryan getting injured on Monday.

Shield vs. Alberto Del Rio/Ryback/Titus O’Neal/Damien Sandow/Bad News Barrett

Axel has been attacked in the back as well so it’s 5-3. Ryback takes Rollins down with a headlock but a dropkick puts Ryback down, allowing Shield to start making their fast tags. Ryback catches Rollins diving off the top for a slam and it’s off to Titus for more power. He misses an elbow drop though and it’s off to Ambrose for some knees to the face. Reigns gets two off a clothesline before Dean comes in again. Titus drives him into the corner as the announcers actually hype up the PPV six man. Everything breaks down for a few seconds and Shield clears the ring as we take a break.

Back with Barrett putting Ambrose in a chinlock before getting two off a big boot. Del Rio comes in for a quickly broken chinlock followed by the enziguri for two. Dean is sent to the floor before being thrown back in so Ryback can splash him for two. We hit another chinlock followed by a spinebuster for two as Rollins makes the save. Dean avoids a charge in the corner and makes the tag to Reigns to clean house.

Everything breaks down with the Shield in control and Reigns hitting the running boot to the apron on Sandow. Del Rio and Barrett look to charge Roman but Rollins gets on the apron and they bail. Rollins dives on Ryback and both he and Ambrose dive on Titus and Sandow. Reigns nails the Superman Punch to Del Rio on the stage and it’s Sandow being sent back into the ring. A dropkick from Ambrose sets up the spear for the pin at 10:20 shown of 13:50.

Rating: C+. Now THIS is what the Shield needs to do before the match against Evolution. They may have had some issues for part of the match but by the end it was a decimation of five names with a former World Champion in the mix. This was a team dominating to set up a showdown with another team that could dominate anyone they face. Want to find out what happens? Watch Extreme Rules. It’s that simple and they made it work here.

Titus and Ryback get speared as well and the latter takes the Triple Bomb to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This was all about setting up the PPV and it worked very well. I’m fired up for the six man and I want to see the other matches even more now. The wrestling wasn’t all that great but it wasn’t that kind of a show. Shield taking over is something that hasn’t gotten old yet and that’s the big story for the night. It’s an entertaining show that set up future stuff which is a good use for Smackdown.

Results
Cesaro b. Jack Swagger – Neutralizer
Tamina Snuka b. Natalya – Superkick
Curtis Axel b. Jey Uso – Neckbreaker into a cutter
Wyatt Family b. Cody Rhodes/Goldust – Discus lariat to Goldust
Shield b. Ryback/Alberto Del Rio/Titus O’Neal/Bad News Barrett/Damien Sandow – Spear to Sandow

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: April 21, 2014

This week was the heavy lifting show as we head towards Extreme Rules. We got the big angles taken care of and the World Title match is set with a great push angle on Raw. Other than that it was a lot of big time promos to get us ready for the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

The big segment opened the show as we had Daniel Bryan and Brie Bella celebrating the title win together for one of their few appearances together in the ring. It didn’t last long though as Stephanie and her horrible music interrupted things. This eventually led to Kane coming out and destroying Bryan with three tombstones, including one on the floor, steps and announce table, all while Stephanie’s bad acting reminded us that she was there.

This was the angle that they needed for multiple reasons. First and foremost, it makes Kane look like a monster heading into the title match. No he isn’t going to win of course, but this was the Ivan Drago vs. Apollo Creed moment that Bryan needed for motivation (except it’s Bryan instead of his friend of course). It also plays up Kane as the monster in the mask again which we haven’t seen in awhile now. Third it also lets Bryan get off TV so he can deal with the real life passing of his father, which is what really matters.

One more thing: Stephanie McMahon may look good in a red dress, but DEAR GOODNESS she can be annoying. It wasn’t even in the way it was supposed to be, as Stephanie is supposed to be her telling Kane to tone it down but it came off as her just whining and being condescending. That gets really old in a hurry and took away from the segment, which happens far too often with her.

Barrett beat Sheamus in the tournament in a surprise. That more or less cements Barrett as the tournament winner and I like the idea quite a bit. He’s been on fire since he got back in the ring and has been wiping people out with that Bull Hammer.

Hugh Jackman is guest hosting again next week. I’m cool with that as Jackman actually seems to love being out there which is all you can ask for from one of these things.

The Wyatts continue their creepy promos against Cena. Wyatt absolutely has to win in the cage and I think he’s going to. The thing is I’m not sure where we go after that, but I’m really interested in where it’s going given all those promos.

El Torito vs. Hornswoggle happened. Yeah there were others involved, but that’s the pairing that mattered. I can’t even begin to think of the people we can’t get on Raw, but these guys get their time of course, to hype a movie that has been mentioned I think once. Such is life in WWE.

The Shield vs. Evolution promo was awesome as well with Rollins in particular shining on the mic. It’s reminding me of Cactus vs. HHH to a degree with HHH being backed into a corner and forced to fight against people chomping at the bit to get their hands on him. There really isn’t much to say about this other than I’m far more excited about the match than I was before.

The Rhodes Brothers started their split while we’re getting ready for Ryback/Axel vs. Usos at Extreme Rules. I’m fine with both actually as Cody works better on his own and the magic of Goldust’s return was going to fall apart at some point.

Emma, Layla, Cobras, stupid.

RVD beat Cesaro to advance as well thanks to Jack Swagger. No real shock here as they had to get to this match somehow. The wrestling was better than I expected too. We also got a very nice post match segment where RVD planted some seeds of doubt in Cesaro’s mind regarding Heyman. I have a feeling this will be revisited in the future.

Paige beat Aksana in another not great match. At the end of the day though, I can’t blame Paige for a lot of these issues. We know she can go in the ring, but she’s no miracle worker that can drag a good match out of Aksana. It also doesn’t help that there’s the stigma of her being the best developmental Diva in forever so there’s a big standard to look up to. The finishing move looks awesome though.

Rusev squashed Sin Cara in a match that was more competitive than I was expecting. I kind of like that people are getting in offense on him but he’s just shrugging it off and winning fast. Lana’s legs continue to be mesmerizing.

Cena somehow beat the Wyatts in a 3-1 handicap match as chosen by the fans. I’m not sure why the Wyatts didn’t get the win here but it’s not the biggest problem in the world. The DQ ending made sense but it wasn’t the right choice overall. The post match stuff with Bray hugging an unconscious Cena and singing even more is creepy, but they need to follow up on it.

Overall Raw was entertaining this week but it was all about setting up the future. I’m genuinely curious as to where some of this stuff is going, but at the same time I’m really not sure they can pull off some of the stuff they’re setting up. Bray vs. Cena has potential if they’ll take some chances (no I’m not saying turn Cena) and the Shield rocket push is going strong. There’s hope at the moment but I need to see more before making a real judgment.

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Monday Night Raw – April 22, 2014: The Honeymoon Is Over

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 21, 2014
Location: Baltimore Arena, Baltimore, Maryland
Commentators: Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Jerry Lawler

Things should pick up a bit before Extreme Rules tonight as the roster is back from Saudi Arabia and Daniel Bryan is back from his honeymoon. The interesting question now is what happens with the World Title situation as Evolution vs. Shield is taking over the main event scene and leaving Bryan in the dust. This rings of Chris Benoit back in 2004 but Benoit was nowhere near as over as Bryan is now. It’s going to be a great test either way though. Let’s get to it.

Here’s the champ to open the show and for once, Brie Bellaelson is in the ring for a YES chant. Well she’s certainly a better looking cheerleader than Bryan. They chant together until Stephanie and her horrible song interrupts. Stephanie congratulates Bryan on winning the title at Wrestlemania and getting married in the same week. The newlyweds talk about how amazing and simple their ceremony was but Stephanie has a present for them: a title defense against Kane at Extreme Rules.

Stephanie recommends that Brie get out of the ring because here comes the Big Fried Freak. Or at least his music as there’s no Kane. Bryan slowly backs Brie to the floor and Kane pops up to choke Daniel. Stephanie says that’s enough as Kane stalks Brie. Bryan tries to fight back and sends Kane into the steps but the monster rams him into the barricade.

We actually get a tombstone on the floor and here are EMTs to save Bryan. As usual this is a bad idea with Kane around as he breaks up the stretcher and tombstones Bryan on the steps in a SICK landing. Bryan is put on the stretcher again but Kane picks him up and gives him a third tombstone onto the table which DOESN’T BREAK. Bryan is DONE as we go to a break.

Back from a break and Daniel is being taken out of the ring on a stretcher as Stephanie offers her condolences and holds up the titles. Those replays make things look even more sick.

Intercontinental Title #1 Contenders Tournament Semi-Finals: Bad News Barrett vs. Sheamus

Barrett does his usual schtick before the match. Sheamus gets pounded into the corner to start but comes back with forearms of his own followed by the rolling fireman’s carry. Some more foreams put Barrett on the floor and Sheamus DIVES off the top with a cross body in a cool looking spot. Back in and Barrett fights out of the ten forearms before kicking
Sheamus off the apron as we take a break.

We come back with the guys still brawling and Sheamus hitting the ten forearms and top rope shoulder for two. Irish Curse gets the same but Barrett grabs the Winds of Change for two of his own. Barrett loads up the Bull Hammer but Sheamus ducks under and hits White Noise for an even closer near fall. They slug it out and a Cactus Clothesline puts both guys down on the floor. Barrett gets back in and Sheamus gives chase, only to charge into the Bull Hammer for the pin at 10:32.

Rating: C+. Take two big strong guys and let them beat the tar out of each other for ten minutes at a time. That’s a BIG win for Barrett as well, who is amazingly getting over with a strong character and a good finisher on top of that. Sheamus is going to be fine no matter what happens to him, arguably making him far more valuable than he was as World Heavyweight Champion.

Bo Dallas vignette.

Hugh Jackman is guest hosting Raw next week so we look at him helping Zack Ryder helping beat Dolph Ziggler in September 2011.

Pick Cena’s opponent tonight: Luke Harper, Luke Harper/Erick Rowan, Luke Harper/Erick Rowan/Bray Wyatt.

We’ve got Wyatts. Bray says he remembers the first time he was struck with truth. It tasted bitter but he loved the intensity of how real it was. Free will has become man’s biggest illusion. It’s promised to you just in time to take it away again. What has it given you? Nothing but a nation full of sheep led by wolves and owned by pigs. Tonight would be a wonderful night for change though because the power is in the fans’ hands. Tonight free will does exist and John Cena will learn the truth.

The truth is they stand against him, whether it be either of the brothers, in a steel cage, or inside your own mind. At Extreme Rules, two monsters will enter but on this night it will not matter which one has the sharpest teeth or the sharpest claws. One thing will remain the same: they do not love Cena anymore because Bray is taking them with him every single time they cross paths. Bray leads the fans in He’s Got The Whole Worlds In His Hands and tells the brothers to sing. Awesome moment.

Los Matadores/El Torito vs. 3MB

It’s Hornswoggle/Mahal/McIntyre here. McIntyre and Diego get things going but it’s quickly off to the little guys to continue this horribly pointless feud. They slug it out until Torito takes him down with a headscissors followed by a spinning springboard headbutt. Drew breaks up the pin and wants a piece of Torito but it’s Slater taking a gore between the legs for his efforts. Torito gets picked up but kicks Drew low, allowing the masked men to pick him up for a double belly to back suplex plus a seated senton from Torito for the pin at 2:50. For the love of all things good and holy, not at Extreme Rules.

We look back at Evolution beating up Shield last week.

Evolution arrives.

Here’s Evolution with something to say. HHH can barely talk due to what sounds like a bad sore throat so it’s quickly off to Orton to brag about how awesome Evolution is. We get a video on Evolution with a few shots of Flair thrown in for history’s sake. Batista brags about the number of titles the three of them have and says Shield has nothing to brag about. Cue the Hounds of Justice but Evolution immediately bails.

Ambrose says that they’ve lost fights before and they’re not humbled this week. He says there’s a reason HHH hired them to protect HHH and Orton. They are the meanest, nastiest, dirtiest animals in this industry. These dogs are hungry and ready to fight. Rollins says they have every right to be angry after what happened when Evolution had twelve other guys around them. In two weeks at Extreme Rules it’s Evolution vs. the Hounds of Justice in an all out war.

Then there’s nowhere for them to run and all three members of Evolution is going to be looking out for themselves. At Extreme Rules, Evolution is ripped to pieces and the reunion comes to an abrupt halt. HHH put a nail in his own coffin and the Shield is the hammer that drives it home.

Reigns says last week Evolution gave them an ultimatum. This week they have one for Evolution. In a few seconds he’s dropping this mic and coming up the stage for a fight. Evolution can try to fight like men, or they can cower away and hide. Here comes the Shield and here’s the midcard to stand in front of Evolution. HHH says it’s option three: adapt or perish.

We look at the opening segment again.

New Adam Rose vignette.

Network plug.

Usos vs. Rhodes Brothers

Non-title with Ryback/Axel on commentary. Jey and Goldust get things going with a feeling out process and the golden one getting taken down. Off to Cody tho gets taken down as well while Ryback tells a story about his dad tending bar for Curt Hennig and Razor Ramon back in the AWA days. Totally random but interesting.

Back to Goldust who takes over on the arm and rams it into the mat for some control. Ryback talks about how he’s been watching Goldust for nineteen years now which is a totally fair argument against him. In a very sudden ending, a superkick takes down Goldust and another is good for the pin on Cody at 3:10.

Rating: D+. This was much more of a story than a match and it looks like the Rhodes Brothers are wrapping up as a team now. To be fair it’s not like they’ve done anything in a few months now so they might as well be split up with the division actually having some depth now. Ryback was interesting on commentary to say the least.

Cody and Goldust shove each other post match and here comes the split. Ryback/Axel jump the Usos as well.

Emma vs. Layla

A distraction from the guys lets Layla take over quickly and she stomps Emma down in the corner. Layla cranks on both of Emma’s arms and mocks the dance a bit as Fandango leads cheers. Emma takes Layla down as Santino lays out Fandango with the Cobra. Emma pulls out a cobra of her own and layls out Layla for the pin at 2:20. Again, NO MORE OF THIS.

The cobras want each other post match.

The announcers talk about Legends House.

John Cena says it’s up to the WWE Universe tonight. We get the dueling chants and he thinks Bray might have everyone in his hands.

Intercontinental Title #1 Contender Tournament Semi-Finals: Cesaro vs. Rob Van Dam

Before the match we see Heyman talking about his clients and going on about Lesnar conquering the Streak. We take a break and come back with him still ranting about it until RVD’s music cuts him off. Feeling out process to start with Van Dam’s kicks being caught into a big slam for two as the announcers debate how great a manager Heyman really is. A middle rope kick to the face drops Cesaro but he comes back with a nice suplex for two. Rob misses a charge into the post and Cesaro kicks him even further into the post as we take another break.

Back with Van Dam’s sunset flip being countered by a jumping stomp to the chest for two. We hit the chinlock for a bit but Rob comes back and kicks Cesaro in the head to escape. A hard clothesline and kick to the face set up Rolling Thunder for two. The Five Star is broken up by a STIFF uppercut but another kick to the head sets up the split legged moonsault from Rob for another near fall. Yet another spinning kick misses and Cesaro hits a running uppercut to the back of the head and rolls Rob to the mat.

They slug it out and a rolling cradle gets two for Van Dam, only to have Cesaro nail a tiger bomb for an even closer two. Cesaro loads up the Swing but here are Swagger and Colter for a distraction. Van Dam gets in another kick to send Cesaro outside and Swagger comes for a closer look. Rob tries to dive at them but jumps into a sweet uppercut to the jaw from Cesaro. Rob is thrown back inside as Swagger posts Cesaro, allowing for the countout to send RVD to the finals at 13:19.

Rating: B-. Good stuff here with the styles working together perfectly here. The ending was somewhat predictable as you already had Barrett waiting in the finals for the winner. At least the match was good getting there and Barrett should be a lock to win next week. Good match here and far better than I was expecting.

Post match Cesaro goes to swing Colter but has to settle for Swagger instead.

We look at Bryan getting destroyed again.

Cesaro and Heyman come up to RVD in the back and say Colter and Swagger won that match for Van Dam. Rob suggests Cesaro stay as far away from Heyman as possible.

Paige vs. Aksana

Non-title again. The announcers immediately start hyping up Tamina as a tough Diva as Paige throws Aksana across the ring by the hair a few times. Aksana comes back with some choking and throws Paige down as the announcers make fun of Aksana’s very notable tan. She crawls around on the mat but Paige slams her into the mat over and over again to take over. A series of clotheslines has Aksana in trouble but she comes back with a throw, apparently supposed to be a spinebuster. Paige comes back with a guillotine choke and some knees to the head, setting up the Scorpion Cross Lock for the submission at 4:42.

Rating: D+. I’m feeling sorry for Paige as they keep putting her in there with this chick. Aksana is gorgeous and looks great with the dark hair, but at the end of the day she just can’t do it in the ring. The crawling around stuff looks stupid and the whole thing isn’t working at all. Therefore, let’s use HER to get Paige over because that’s playing to Paige’s strengths right?

Alexander Rusev vs. Sin Cara

Truth/Woods vs. Rusev at the PPV which should cement the ending here. Cara fires off his chops but gets caught in mid air, setting up the knees against the ropes and fall away slam to the masked man. Some jumping knees in the corner drop Sin Cara as Lana is very pleased. Sin Cara actually gets two off a sunset flip and staggers the Bulgarian with a Tajiri elbow. A kick to the head and missile dropkick put Rusev in the corner but Alexander just runs him over. An overhead suplex drops Sin Cara and the Accolade gets the submission at 2:59.

The 3-1 handicap match wins the poll with 53%. Harper on his own got a very surprising 39% with the 2-1 getting less than 10%.

John Cena vs. Wyatt Family

The Wyatts surround the ring to start before all three charge the ring at the same time. Cena is down so Bray calls them off as the bell rings. Harper gets us going and drives elbows into the back of Cena’s head to keep control. Off to Rowan who whips Cena into the corner but gets caught in a fallaway slam and it’s off to Bray. The leader of the Family dances with Cena for a bit before screaming loudly.

Back to Harper who gets caught by a Stinger Splash but runs John over with a hard elbow to the jaw. Cena muscles Harper over with a German suplex but Luke tags Rowan back in for more stomping. Harper quickly gets another tag but is almost caught in an STF. Rowan makes a fast save and Harper stays in to send Cena hard into the steps. Bray looks down and we take a break.

We come back to see Cena missing a cross body and falling out to the floor. John comes back in and runs over Harper but Bray easily counters a tornado DDT by PLANTING him with a release Rock Bottom. He hammers away and sends Cena shoulder first into the post. A headbutt rams Cena’s head into the steel again before Rowan comes back in to crush Cena’s skull a bit more.

John fights back but it’s back to Bray who loads up the spider walk. Thankfully Cena realizes how easy this is and runs him over with a clothesline to start his comeback. Cena starts his finishing sequence and hits the AA on Bray, only to have the Family come in for the DQ at 14:00.

Rating: C. The match was going fine ubt you knew there was no way this was having a clean finish. I’m not sure why you don’t have Cena take the loss here as it’s not like losing a handicap match here is a big deal. Bray needs to get the big win over Cena and hopefully that comes at Extreme Rules. Not bad but I don’t like the ending.

Post match the Wyatts beat Cena down and Bray hits Sister Abigail. He says in time, all things come to light before singing a bit more with his hand on Cena’s face to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. Some stuff got done tonight but the main event has more problems caused by real life. Daniel Bryan being written off TV again to deal with the sudden passing of his father (legitimate story and certainly worth missing some time) hurts things as he’s starting to lose some of the awesome heat he put together with Wrestlemania. That being said, the Shield vs. Evolution match is looking AWESOME and everything is going well there. The midcard scene was solid tonight as well so we’ll go with a good show that has some worrying issues.

Results
Bad News Barrett b. Sheamus – Bull Hammer
Los Matadores/El Torito b. 3MB – Double belly to back suplex/Top rope seated senton to McIntyre
Usos b. Cody Rhodes/Goldust – Superkick to Rhodes
Emma b. Layla – Cobra
Rob Van Dam b. Cesaro via countout
Alexander Rusev b. Sin Cara – Accolade
Paige b. Aksana – Scorpion Cross Lock
John Cena b. Wyatt Family via DQ when all three members were in the ring at the same time

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Monday Night Raw – April 7, 2014: Playing To The Crowd

Monday Night Raw
Date: April 7, 2014
Location: Smoothie King Center, New Orleans, Louisiana
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield

It’s the night after one of the best show in years and the big question is where do they go from here? For the first time ever, Undertaker is coming off a loss at Wrestlemania in what very well may be his last match. Other than that we’ve got a new WWE World Heavyweight Champion in the form of a goat man. Tonight is usually one of the most fun shows of the year. Let’s get to it.

As you might have heard, I was in the arena for the show so this is my second viewing. It’s being written the Wednesday after so a lot of things have changed.

We open with the Monster video on Daniel Bryan’s career that aired at Wrestlemania. The song fits so perfectly. The video eats up nearly five minutes but it’s awesome.

The arena is filled with the YES chant and here’s Daniel Bryan to drive it them even harder. Bryan is wearing the World Heavyweight Championship and has the WWE Championship in his hand. I wish they would just get rid of one already. Even JBL admits that Daniel Bryan is an A+ player. The music stops and the DANIEL BRYAN chant begins. They go on so long that Bryan asks if the people ever get tired. The fans switch into the NO chant and Bryan says be careful that you don’t hit the people next to you.

The YES chant starts again and Bryan joins in but says after this his shoulders need a break. Daniel talks about starting the pose two years ago and now everyone in the WWE Universe is united under one word. He’s cut off again by a YOU DESERVE IT chant and you can see Daniel is getting overwhelmed by the reaction. He says he deserves it a little bit but the fans deserve the rest. The YES stuff isn’t about a movement or anything else, but about the power the fans have to make a change. It gave him the chance to stand up to the Authority and now he is the WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION.

The fans strike up the band one more time but here are HHH and Stephanie (in a very nice black dress) to interrupt. They stand on the apron and the fans aren’t pleased with HHH. Cole: “It’s going to be one of those nights.” HHH says he isn’t going to step into the ring because he doesn’t want to do something he’s going to regret. Bryan: “You’re not getting in the ring? Hang on a second.” Bryan gets right in his face and starts another YES chant in a great bit. The boss says enjoy this while you can, because tonight Bryan is defending against HHH himself. HHH throws the mic down so hard the cube falls off and we get a final chant.

After a break HHH and Stephanie are in the back and talking about how great tonight is going to be. Batista comes in and says he wants his rematch because it’s HHH’s fault that Bryan was in the main event. He says he earned a one on one shot at the title but Orton comes in and says he wants his rematch tonight. HHH says he himself is getting the shot but the other two will at some point. Stephanie gives them a Tag Team Title shot as a consolation prize. HHH reminds them that when they work together, things go their way.

Wyatt Family vs. Big E./John Cena/Sheamus

The fans clap along to the Wyatts’ song. The good guys come out after a break, during which a video aired about WWE’s issues with cars over the years. Seeing the Wyatts stand in the ring and watch was rather odd to see. Cena is of course absolutely LOATHED by the smarky crowd but he smirks it off. In something that is going to catch on fast, the fans chant JOHN CENA SUCKS in time to his music. It’s a brawl to start until we get down to Cena vs. Bray. A big right hand drops Cena and the fans go NUTS. Cena comes back and you would think he lit Santa Claus on fire.

Sheamus comes in off the tag and stomps away in the corner to a slightly less hateful reaction. The fans chant for Bryan before chanting for Erick Rowan who comes in off the tag. A running forearm drops Erick into the corner and he hammers away with right hands, only to be shoved down to the mat. Sheamus fights back with a knee to the side of the head and it’s off to Big E.

The champ picks up Rowan for three straight backbreakers, drawing the ONLY face pop of the match for his team. Off to Harper, who accidentally runs into Rowan to knock him off the apron. Cena comes back in for a quick Protobomb and the Shuffle (minus the run). An AA doesn’t work so Harper slams him face first into the mat for two. Bray gets the tag and we take a break.

Back with Cena fighting out of a Harper chinlock as the fans chant for the Family. He still can’t get the AA though and Harper drops him with a DDT for two. Rowan comes back in for a legdrop as the fans sing He’s Got The Whole World In His Hands. Wyatt stomps a mudhole until John fights up with a hard clothesline. You can actually hear a TINY Let’s Go Cena chant but the singing drowns it out again.

Bray headbutts him down and it’s back to Harper for some uppercuts. Cena fights up and makes the tag off to Sheamus to clean house. The rolling fireman’s carry puts Harper onto Rowan but a Wyatt distraction breaks up the Brogue. Back to Big E. as everything breaks down. Big E. loads up the Big Ending on Bray but Harper breaks it up with a nice looking superkick. Harper hits a suicide dive to take out Sheamus and the place goes NUTS. Bray spider walks out of the corner (Lawler: “CALL YOUR LOCAL EXORCIST!”) and gets a Wyatt’s Gonna Kill You chant, setting up Sister Abigail on Big E. for the pin at 10:30 shown at 13:14.

Rating: C+. This would fall into the category of fun rather than good and there’s nothing wrong with that. The crowd was awesome here because of one major reason: they chanted about stuff going on in the ring. Not the announcers, not wrestlers that haven’t been on the show in years, not Justin Roberts. They were chanting about the Wyatts and John Cena and the match felt like a much bigger deal as a result. The Wyatts looked great here too.

Slam City ad.

Bo Dallas vignette, with Dallas playing something like a motivational speaker. “It’s not pronounced impossible, but I’M POSSIBLE.” The fans liked the idea of this, even though it took awhile to get to the reveal of who it was.

Fandango/Summer Rae vs. Emma/Santino Marella

Summer looks great in blue. The guys get things going with a quick dance off but Fandango quickly runs from the Cobra. Off to the girls and Summer is quickly caught in the Dilemma followed by the Emmamite Sandwich (zero need to change the name) and the Emma Lock (bridging Indian Deathlock) for the submission at 1:30. This was just a way to showcase Emma.

Here are Lesnar and Heyman for the ultimate bragging session. Heyman bows down to Brock to just drive the crowd even crazier. JBL brings up the comparison to Bruno losing the title to Koloff and that’s really the only thing you can compare the Streak to. Paul introduces himself and says he’s glad to represent the conqueror of the Streak. Brock has a nasty looking black eye.

Heyman talks about the Streak lasting nearly a quarter of a century before being broken in three seconds. The fans are LIVID which Heyman says is a lack of intelligence. He hates to say we told you so, but WE TOLD YOU SO! How could anyone doubt Heyman’s mind or Brock’s physical attributes? Brock isn’t here to make people smile. Instead he’s here to shock the WWE Universe and put tears in the eyes of children.

If that’s not great enough, Heyman wants to shoot a bit. Five seconds after Undertaker walked through the curtain, Undertaker collapsed (apparently a true story). He was taken to the hospital and Vince McMahon went with him instead of staying for the main event of Wrestlemania. Undertaker is lucky that he was pinned so soon, because Brock wasn’t stopping until the Streak was dead.

What really gets to Heyman is that after the match was over, “John Bradshaw Layfield and those other two things called announcers, plus 80,000 other people in the Super Dome Hogan, not the Silver Dome, gave Undertaker a standing ovation.” However they should have been chanting the winner. That brings him to tonight. This is supposed to be the wildest crowd of the year and every member of this audience is just like the WWE locker room: they’re all wannabes.

Everyone back there wants to be Brock Lesnar but Brock doesn’t like anyone. “He barely tolerates me!” Brock isn’t going to suck up to a bunch of people that fly in once a year for Raw after Wrestlemania. A lot of people say they could have broken the Streak, but BROCK did it. A lot of people wanted to fight in the Octagon and be the UFC Champion but BROCK did it. A lot of people wanted to be the NCAA Heavyweight Champion but BROCK did it. Everyone else is a wannabe because BROCK LESNAR is the one.

A lot of people came up to Heyman last night and said they could have broken the Streak. “Yeah? Well why didn’t you?” BROCK did, and he’s the 1 in 21-1. Heyman hears a WHTA chant so he slows down and repeats the 1 in 21-1 line. There are legends, Superstars and Hall of Famers. All of them are plural though, and there’s just one BROCK LESNAR. This was one of the best promos ever and Heyman just owned the audience and the locker room. I kept waiting for someone to come out and confront him, but I’m glad no one did. This needed to be all about Brock for the night, not setting up anything else just yet.

Adam Rose and his party bus are coming. The fans ate this up with a spoon. It’s another example of a character that is different and the fans responded to it faster than another version of “cocky heel that is better than you” or “plucky face that just wants to compete.” It’s a character rather than a gimmick and that’s always going to work.

Tag Team Titles: Randy Orton/Batista vs. Usos

The twins are defending. Something that took a little getting used to this weekend: seeing the Usos just standing there during the previous entrance. I knew they were there due to how the entrances worked but it looks odd in person. Batista draws the YOU TAPPED OUT chants but easily takes Jimmy into the corner for a tag off to Randy. Jimmy fires back with some right hands but Orton headbutts him back. The fans are already bored and start a Y2J chant, followed by one for CM Punk, Justin Roberts and JBL. The Usos are sent to the floor and destroyed until it’s a double countout at 2:15.

Orton hits an Elevated DDT on the floor to Jimmy and Batista nails a LOUD Batista Bomb to Jey on the steps. They were smart to keep this one short before the fans took things over again. I would have preferred it wasn’t against the champions though.

Damien Sandow vs. Rob Van Dam

Van Dam got a nice reaction but it wasn’t deafening. A quick kick sends Sandow outside but he comes back in with some forearms to the back and shoulders in the corner. Another kick to the face puts Sandow on the apron and a third sends him to the floor. Sandow is draped over the barricade for the spinning kick to the back and the fans think Rob still has it. Back in and Rolling Thunder sets up the Five Star for the pin at 2:49. Just a return squash.

Rey Mysterio vs. Bad News Barrett

Barrett gets one of the loudest pops of the night for his first match since late last year. The fans chant for Barrett right after the bell and he grabs the mic for the catchphrase, only to get nailed by some forearms, making Rey a heel for the night. A headscissors sends Barrett to the floor and Rey hits the sliding splash under the bottom rope. Back in and Barrett counters a headscissors and kicks Rey in the stomach to take over.

An OLE chant starts and Barrett gets two off the Winds of Change. Barrett nails him with a running knee in the corner but Rey breaks up a superplex attempt. A headscissors doesn’t work for Rey but he nails a spinning DDT for two, followed by the 619. Rey goes up but gets crotched down, setting up the Bull Hammer for the pin at 3:50.

Rating: C-. The match was nothing but hopefully the company realizes they’ve got something here with Barrett. He looked good in the ring and the fans were WAY into him. See what happens when you have a talented guy wrestle instead of just making stupid jokes that no one remembers?

Video on Alexander Rusev.

Another Adam Rose video, taking him inside his bus. “This is my current ex-girlfriend, and this is my future ex-girlfriend.” He also says you need little people to have a big party and that he loves bunnies because they hop. This is going to get over in a hurry.

Alexander Rusev vs. Zack Ryder

Lana is officially named the Ravishing Russian. That won’t last but she looks good in the short skirts. This is exactly what you would expect (plus a nice jumping kick to the face) and ends in 1:19 after the Accolade (Camel clutch) with Ryder tapping very quickly.

Hall of Fame video.

And now for the part that is hard to watch. The Ultimate Warrior comes to the ring with a rather red face. He certainly looks to be in good spirits though. Warrior puts on a coat like he used to wear back in the day and does the rope shake a few times but already looks blown up. He says it’s been hard for him to find the words to say this evening so he pulls out a Warrior mask to get into old form.

Warrior tells Warrior (yes that’s right) to shut up and let him do the talking. He talks about no one becoming a legend on their own because everyone’s heart beats their last beat and they breathe their last breath. However, no one’s memory is ever forgotten because the storytellers will carry their spirit on forever. The fans are the legend makers of the Ultimate Warrior. He sees some in the back with the Warrior Spirit and they can make those people legends as well. The spirit of the Warrior will run forever. That’s absolutely chilling as he would be gone less than 24 hours later.

We get a cool video on all of the work and equipment that it takes to broadcast Raw. However, none of it would be possible without the fans. This drew a WE ARE AWESOME chant in the arena.

Here are AJ and Tamina with something to say. AJ talks about being the Divas Champion for 295 days, which is the longest reign ever. Several months back she tore the Divas a new one and no one has been able to prove them wrong. Last night she showed why she’s the hero of this story because it was AJ Lee vs. the world and she overcame the odds again. She was a poor girl in New Jersey to being the best Diva in the world.

AJ has to pause for a CM Punk chant before saying she is the Divas division…..and here’s the debuting Paige. The fans absolutely love her but AJ wants to know why she’s here. Paige says she’s here to do what no one else would: congratulate her for her win. AJ says every Diva should be doing that but she doesn’t need the congratulations. Paige needs to go running back to NXT because AJ doesn’t need to hear this. AJ calls her sweet and offers her a match right now. Paige says she isn’t ready and gets slapped in the face for her efforts. AJ says ring the bell and let’s make it a title match for fun.

Divas Title: AJ Lee vs. Paige

AJ jumps her to start and hammers away before parading around the ring. Paige powers out of the Black Widow (despite slapping AJ’s leg which looked a lot like tapping) and mostly botches the Paige Turner (kind of a snap reverse Angle Slam) but gets the pin and the title at 1:18. The place went NUTS at the pinfall and AJ has no idea what to do.

Another Bo Dallas vignette.

Here’s Hulk Hogan for the Andre trophy presentation. He gets the building name right to an approving reaction and talks about what a great Wrestlemania moment the battle royal was. Hogan knew Andre was smiling when Cesaro won and says the battle royal will keep going every year. Apparently there were 31 men in the battle royal last night and here’s the one that survived.

Cesaro comes out in a shiny jacket with Zeb Colter by his side. Hogan shakes his hand, congratulates Cesaro and actually leaves without saying anything else. Zeb takes the mic and says a real American should do the talking. He promises to give the mic back to Cesaro in a minute so Cesaro can “say what kind of a guy he really is.” Cesaro is a guy who was invited into the Real Americans fold ten months ago. He made Cesaro a Zeb Colter Guy but Cesaro takes the mic. “I’m sorry Zeb. I’m a Zeb Colter Guy. I’m a Paul Heyman Guy.” The fans take a second to realize what they heard and start up the YES chant.

Heyman comes out with a big smile on his face and says he’s now the advocate for the King of Swing, Cesaro. Colter is livid as Heyman shakes Cesaro’s hand. Heyman calls Zeb grandpa and says this is a shocking week for Paul Heyman Guys. Paul heads outside to tell the announcers (including another JBL and those other guys comment) how to address the King of Swing. The fans chant the new nickname as Swagger hits the ring to attack Cesaro and BREAK THE TROPHY. Cesaro goes after him and we go to a break.

During the break, Brad Maddox came out and said clean up the mess so we can have a match. The crew came in to clean things up and a guy with a broom swept out the ring. The fans gave him a “Let’s go sweeper!” chant and he even gave a fist pump when he was done. It was a little thing but gave us a nice moment nonetheless.

Cesaro vs. Jack Swagger

Back with Cesaro fighting up and hitting a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Heyman is holding the Andre statue, minus its right leg. Swagger tries to leave but gets kicked in the ribs and thrown back into the ring. Cesaro goes up top but Jack runs the corner and suplexes him down to take over.

Jack cranks on both arms for a bit but gets caught by some European uppercuts. A powerslam gets two on Cesaro but the Vader Bomb hits feet (Swagger landed one during the break). Cesaro nails the superplex from the apron and some running uppercuts in the corner. He loads up the Swing but Jack runs away for the countout at 5:15.

We recap the opening segment.

Stephanie is in the back with Shield and Kane. Her orders for the night are to make sure HHH leaves with the WWE Title because this was an injustice. Rollins says that’s fine but wants to know where the Outlaws are. Ambrose thinks they’re gone for good but Kane isn’t pleased. He goes on a rant about how expendable Shield is before running his mouth too much, revealing that HHH ordered the attack on them a few weeks ago. Stephanie goes back to the injustice line and says what HHH wants, he gets.

WWE World Heavyweight Title: HHH vs. Daniel Bryan

The title now has YES plates. Instead of HHH, here are Batista and Orton. They surround the ring and beat Bryan down with both guys hitting their finishers. Kane comes out to add a chokeslam and here’s HHH. He demands the bell ring but like any villain, he takes his time and the Shield is here for the save. Why HHH didn’t cover Bryan while they were heading to the ring is anyone’s guess. The “match” officially started but we’ll call it a no contest at about eight seconds.

Shield gets on one side of the ring while Orton/Kane/Batista are on the other. The fans chant HOUNDS OF JUSTICE while HHH says don’t do it. He says this isn’t going to be a war but walks into the spear and it’s on. Rollins and Ambrose lay out Orton and Batista with dives (Ambrose’s mostly missed) and HHH is all alone. Bryan is getting up and with the YES chant going through the roof, it’s a running knee to the boss to end the show.

The post show scene was excellent as well with Shield all saying the Believe line and Bryan giving a very emotional speech about how he’s living his dream because of all the fans. WWE played a video that was made by people you’ll never see in front of a camera, but he thanked the crowd personally, nearly breaking down in tears.

Overall Rating: A. Oh yeah this worked. First and foremost, they kept the crowd from getting too out of hand. Yeah they booed Cena but there’s really no way around that. This show was very fun and a great way to introduce several new characters (or return some that we haven’t seen in action in awhile). The matches were just there as a backdrop for all of the action and for a show like this, that’s the best decision possible.

Bryan vs. HHH is amping up and there are a few options for Extreme Rules. You could go with Bryan vs. HHH II in a gimmick match with Shield taking on the other three, or you could do an eight man war with the title on the line. The key thing though is there are options. We’ve been building to matches we’ve known for months now and a change of pace is very nice. WWE is white hot right now and they’re reloading for Extreme Rules. This was an incredible weekend and if they even keep up most of this momentum things are looking great for the next few months.

Results

Wyatt Family b. John Cena/Sheamus/Big E. – Sister Abigail to Big E.

Emma/Santino Marella b. Fandango/Summer Rae – Emma Lock to Summer

Usos vs. Randy Orton/Batista went to a double countout

Rob Van Dam b. Damien Sandow – Five Star Frog Splash

Bad News Barrett b. Rey Mysterio – Bull Hammer

Alexander Rusev b. Zack Ryder – Accolade

Paige b. AJ Lee – Paige Turner

Cesaro b. Jack Swagger via countout

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Reviewing the Review – Monday Night Raw: March 31, 2014

Last night’s show was something very special and a great example of how to do a go home show. It wasn’t supposed to be about the wrestling and that was to be expected. Let’s get to it.

 

First up was Undertaker showing down with Brock Lesnar and Brock finally getting in some offense on Undertaker. The main complaint that I saw people making was that it took too long to get to the brawling last night, to which all I can say is wrestling fans are impatient nowadays. Heaven forbid you have to wait maybe ninety seconds to see the guys fight. This is one of those moments that was built up for a few weeks and did what it was supposed to do. Every single time Brock has been leading up to a match he’s looked weak in advance, then he goes into Beast Mode in the actual match. Why does this continue to fool people?

 

Del Rio vs. Big E. was actually a solid match but I’m getting annoyed at the booking. Alberto has now beaten Big E. twice this month but there has been no significant mention of a title match coming up. Big E. never defends the thing anyway and while he beats up everyone except for Del Rio (nothing wrong with having a guy you can’t beat), Alberto seems to have no interest in the title. You don’t have to have him win it (though that would be fine), but at least have him look like he wants it. In other words, make a title look valuable and it will become valuable.

 

The Wyatts had another awesome promo. The thing that makes them work is how different they look when they’re talking. Notice that Bray is constantly moving around, changing the pitch of his voice, moving closer to the camera, and switching from serious to comedic. It’s unique and that makes people pay attention to him. The fact that he’s totally into his character and is so out there that it makes people want to see more makes it even better.

 

The Total Divas had a recap and a Summer vs. Natalya match. The match was bad but Summer looks great in her outfits so I can’t complain at all.

 

This brought us to the highlight of the night as the Authority came out to announce the end of the YES Movement. While the HHH and Stephanie bits mocking the pose were a bit annoying, the rest was perfect. HHH basically brought up every common insult against him and laughed them off, because showing an AWESOME video, narrated by Stephanie in a brilliant touch, listing off all of the flavors of the month that he’s destroyed over the years.

 

This is what HHH has been needing to do for a long time now. Don’t talk about his power or his authority, but talk about how he’s one of the best in ring performer of all time (which he is). People often forget how good he is and that’s a shame coming into what’s going to be an awesome match. Yeah HHH can get annoying on camera, but the guy can flat out go in the ring and will do exactly that on Sunday. The video was exactly what he needed to do and it worked like a charm. The fact that Stephanie looked great last night helped too.

 

Orton and Batista came out as well but they didn’t add too much. Batista pointing out that HHH has never beaten him continues to be all he needs to say, but HHH wanting Orton to be the Viper again is a very questionable move. It doesn’t make sense as he’s basically given up on Randy being the face of the company (thank goodness), but he still wants Orton at his peak? That’s not very logical for a heel.

 

The two tag matches didn’t do anything for me. The eight man tag was fine but it just didn’t interest me at all. Los Matadores are nothing interesting and the lack of El Torito made it even worse.

 

Bray Wyatt had a long squash over R-Truth, but the important part was after the match. John Cena wore Wyatt gear and snuck up on them in his first mind game of the feud. The interesting thing here was the pop from the crowd. They went NUTS for Cena in one of the loudest pops I can remember him getting in months. This brings us back to Wrestling 101.

 

John Cena vs. Bray Wyatt boils down to a very simple concept: good vs. evil. John Cena is the bright and colorful hero and Bray Wyatt is the dark and sinister monster. At the end of the day, people want to see John Cena, their hero even though they get tired of him once in awhile, rise up and kill the monster hiding in the fans’ closet. Cena has been afraid but is standing up to face his fears and using his mind and strength to fight for what he believes in.

 

That’s wrestling at its core: seeing larger than life characters doing things that fans wish they could do. It worked for Hogan standing up for America and it worked for Austin beating up his boss. Cena showing weakness and then rising above it (not necessarily winning mind you) is something interesting and the reaction from the crowd the last few weeks proves it.

 

The lumberjill match was nothing special. At the end of the day I wish they went with just a one on one match at Wrestlemania instead of some 14 Diva mess. There are girls out there capable of putting on an entertaining match, but for some reason they’re throwing Vickie, who apparently we’re now supposed to sympathize with, into the mix. I have a bad feeling AJ either wins on Sunday, or somehow Vickie walks out as champion. Neither interests me at all unless Paige debuts the next night on Raw.

 

Then we got one heck of a Cena promo. The guy can just turn on the goods whenever he needs to and that’s what we got last night. Telling people to run down to Wrestlemania or watch on the WWE Network was both a nice plug for the show (I miss those things) as well as a great way to make the event feel like it needed to be seen. You don’t get those anymore and Cena is the kind of guy who demands attention when he’s in serious mode. It just works and it did last night.

 

Kane vs. Reigns wasn’t the point of the Shield segment. The important part was Roman winning 80% of the fans’ votes. If those numbers are legit, the fans are buying into him as the star of the team and that’s exactly what WWE wants. The down side of it though was the Outlaws appearing. Just look at them walking down the ramp and then look at Shield. It just doesn’t work for me and I’m afraid Shield is going to have to tone things way down so the Outlaws can keep up with them. I still don’t get how anyone but the Outlaws benefit from this.

 

Piper’s Pit and the big brawl existed and that’s about all there is to say about it. Big Show is being pushed really hard as the winner of the battle royal, which gives me hope for a swerve. Him winning just isn’t interesting and he doesn’t need it. Sheamus is needing a big win and this would be perfect for him. Oh and Piper losing his mind over the people interrupting him was hilarious.

 

The main event was exactly what it should have been. I think WWE knew the fans would get restless if they had a regular match so they went with the wild brawl instead. Again this was about the moment rather than the match and that’s fine. You couldn’t have the go home show without Bryan making one last run in and that’s exactly what we got. It was a white hot way to end the show and take us into Wrestlemania on Sunday.

 

Overall last night was the exactly right formula for a go home show. The wrestling wasn’t great but it was just good enough to get us through to the important stuff. Every match got time and I’m more fired up to see the show than I was before. Excellent stuff last night with HHH and Cena stealing yet another show.

 

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