Vengeance 2003
Date: July 27, 2003
Location: Pepsi Center, Denver, Colorado
Attendance: 9,500
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

This is the first ever Smackdown exclusive pay per view and for once I’m actually looking forward to it. They’ve done a much better job than usual of setting things up and there are multiple matches that could do quite well. The main event is Big Show vs. Kurt Angle vs. Brock Lesnar for Brock’s Smackdown World Title, but there’s also some major focus on Vince McMahon vs. Zach Gowen for reasons of testing my patience. Let’s get to it.

We open with people talking about working their whole lives to get here. Big names too, like Kurt Angle, Brock Lesnar, and Stephanie McMahon. Vince then narrates a video, ranting about how this is his company and no one is going to get the better of him. I’d rather hear more about how hard Stephanie had it as a kid and how much she had to fight through to get here.

US Title: Eddie Guerrero vs. Chris Benoit

Tournament final to crown the inaugural champion. The referee actually brings them to the middle and explains the rules, which is about as rare of a sight today as Stephanie not running her mouth. Benoit’s eyes seem to be fine after the whole attempt at blinding him a few days ago. Eddie hides in the corner to start until Benoit hits a heck of a shoulder, sending Eddie bailing to the floor.

Back in and Benoit starts in on the arm before winning a test of strength. Eddie slips out and spins around Benoit into a legsweep so smooth that I could barely tell what he did. A pinfall reversal sequence gets some near falls on Benoit, sending him outside for a bit of swearing. Back in and Eddie headlocks him down but gets caught in a shoulder breaker. Benoit still can’t get the Crossface as Eddie gets to the ropes just in time.

Eddie bails to the floor but Benoit is right there with a dive to put both guys down. Back in and Eddie gets caught in a half nelson of all things (leave it to Benoit to make something like that look painful) before going with a hard chop instead. Eddie is right back up with a hurricanrana out of the corner to take over again. The announcers talk about some technical difficulty but it’s been cleaned up on the Network version.

We hit an armbar on Benoit before Eddie pokes him in the eye, which Cole calls a slap. Benoit’s eyes are fine enough to take Eddie up top for a belly to back superplex. The rolling German suplexes set up the Crossface but Eddie gets a boot onto the ropes. Eddie is right back up with Three Amigos, followed by a top rope superplex to put both guys down again. The frog splash only kind of misses as Eddie’s arm hits Benoit as he rolls away, meaning both guys are down again.

Eddie throws the belt onto Benoit and lays down. Now, this might be a fine idea in theory but considering an errant forearm put the referee down for about two minutes, we could be waiting until the Rumble for him to get up again. Benoit pops up and grabs the Crossface to make Eddie tap but of course there’s no one to see it. A German suplex drops Eddie and Benoit tries the Swan Dive, only to have Eddie pull the referee in the way. Cue Rhyno to Gore Benoit in the big screwjob, allowing Eddie to hit the frog splash for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. They were on the way to a masterpiece here when they messed it up with all of the overbooking. You could have completely eliminated at least one of the belt/ref bump things and gotten to Rhyno sooner and the match would have felt tighter. On the more positive side though, this match ran over twenty two minutes and felt like it was about half of that. It never dragged once and that’s one of the hardest things to accomplish in wrestling. Great match and a forgotten classic of an opener.

Stephanie (in a t-shirt for a very rare visual) comes in to see Vince, who is smelling flowers. Bickering ensues and Stephanie DOES NOT want to talk about Linda. Vince is going to Raw to confront Kane. It turns out the flowers are for Stephanie, who calls them nice in a rather aggressive way. Actually the roses are for Sable, but the small bouquet of dried out daises are for Stephanie.

We recap Billy Gunn vs. Jamie Noble, which REALLY doesn’t warrant a recap video. If nothing else, they should be showing more shots of Torrie rather than Jamie. Basically Noble wants to sleep with Torrie and has offered her thousands of dollars. Torrie finally agreed to sleep with him if he can beat Billy tonight.

Billy Gunn vs. Jamie Noble

Jamie brings a briefcase of everything he’ll need for a great night with Torrie. Billy kicks it into his face before opening it up to reveal….I’m going to leave that to your imaginations actually. Billy takes him inside for a wheelbarrow faceplant but misses a splash in the corner. Jamie tries a dive to the floor but gets caught, only to have Billy’s knee give out. Cue Nidia as Jamie cranks on the bad knee.

Billy jumps over a kick to the leg and hits a heck of a cobra clutch slam (take that Jinder) to put both guys down. The Fameasser misses so Billy settles for a cutter for two. Jamie gets in a super DDT but Nidia puts Billy’s foot on the ropes. Torrie comes over for some reason and gets kissed, causing Noble to get slapped back and forth. Back up and Billy gets rammed into Torrie, setting up a rollup with Jamie’s hands on the tights (I saw no pulling) for the pin.

Rating: D. They kept it short and while that made it feel like a TV match, this was much more about getting in and out and moving on. Gunn continues to feel way out of place on these shows while Jamie is doing what he can with a pretty stupid character. You can tell this story is going to continue and while it’s not thrilling, it’s better than letting Billy do anything more important.

The APA isn’t happy with Brooklyn Brawler beating them down on Thursday but invite Funaki anyway. Funaki: “What should I wear?” Bradshaw: “Come as a Japanese reporter who wrestlers part time.” The Easter Bunny walks up (I believe bunnies are supposed to HOP!) and Bradshaw thinks this is going to be fun.

APA Invitational Bar Room Brawl

Faarooq, Bradshaw, Brooklyn Brawler, Chuck Palumbo, Brother Love, Chris Kanyon, Conquistador Dos, Conquistador Uno, Danny Basham, Doink the Clown, Doug Basham, Easter Bunny, Funaki, John Hennigan, Johnny Stamboli, Shannon Moore, Nunzio, Matt Cappatelli, Matt Hardy, Orlando Jordan, Sean O’Haire, Spanky

The Conquistadors are Rob Conway and Johnny Jeter (of the Spirit Squad), Doink is Nick Dinsmore and the Easter Bunny is Aaron Stevens (Damien Sandow). There’s a big bar set up, complete with bottles, some tables, a big saloon sign and a lamp. Everyone is handed a beer as they come in, including Hardy, who hates barfights. The last man drinking wins here because Bradshaw wants to test their livers.

Before we get going though, Love wants a benediction. After he’s done insulting the APA and asking forgiveness, he breaks a stool over the Conquistadors’ backs. Welcome to the main roster guys. Most people are standing around drinking but some are beating the heck out of the Bunny. The Brawler throws Doink through a window as Funaki sits at the bar. O’Haire grabs some pool cues and breaks them over the APA’s heads.

Moore dives off the stage to take O’Haire out but Love breaks a mirror over his head. The Bunny goes through another window and Matt drives a Basham and Kanyon through a table (on the second try). Bradshaw bottles Love in the head and that’s finally it, despite Faarooq standing next to him.

Rating: N/A. This wasn’t wrestling in any way and was little more than a joke that got old in a hurry. They did at least keep it short, but was there a point to this other than filling time? You have these people who have been getting pushed in recent months (Hardy and O’Haire at least) and they’re stuck in this mess designed to keep the APA over? Come on already.

Noble is enjoying a very worn copy of Torrie’s Playboy (with the camera catching a rather clear shot of one of the pictures, which isn’t censored whatsoever on the Network) and brags to a backstage worker. The guy asks about Nidia and is told to mind his own business.

Tag Team Titles: Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. World’s Greatest Tag Team

Charlie Haas and Shelton Benjamin are defending. Shelton takes Rey down to start before they seem to botch a headscissors. The second attempt works a bit better and it’s off to Kidman, who takes a hard knee to the ribs. Something like a Bubba Bomb gets two on Rey and a powerslam gets the same.

We’re already in the chinlock, which hopefully isn’t a sign of this match being short. Shelton’s powerbomb is reversed and the hot tag brings in Kidman. A BK Bomb gives Kidman two and Rey is fast enough to break up the dive onto Kidman’s back. The 619 is broken up as well so Rey settles for a springboard seated senton to the floor to drop Benjamin.

Kidman one ups him with a shooting star to the floor as things have picked WAY up in a hurry. Thankfully the fans seem to appreciate it as well, which is a great sign after the previous match/segment seemed to kill them off a good bit. Shelton posts Kidman though and the champs take over again. Kidman slips out of a surfboard and sends Charlie outside but you know they’re not doing the second hot tag that easily. The tag connects but Shelton had the referee, drawing some very nice heat from the crowd.

A second attempt works a bit better and it’s Rey coming in with an enziguri to Shelton. The 619 into the springboard seated senton looks to finish but the referee is with Kidman, allowing Shelton to make the save. Kidman launches Rey up for a super hurricanrana and a VERY near fall on Haas. Rey’s shocked face and the big reaction from the crowd push things even further as the fans don’t buy that it was only two. Rey loads up a victory roll on Haas but Benjamin makes a blind tag and springboards into a clothesline as Haas powerbombs him down to retain.

Rating: B+. I know the Cruiserweight Title is taking a hit by having the champ do this other stuff but sweet goodness this was a fun match. They seemed to just tell the wrestlers to go nuts for fifteen minutes and there’s nothing wrong with that, especially when you have four people who are capable of something like this. Really fun match here with the champs being more than capable of having with the fast paced challengers.

We recap Stephanie ripping Sable’s top off, including all the screeching.

Sable vs. Stephanie McMahon

No countout here for some reason. Stephanie’s top is rather low cut because that’s at least half the point of this match. Cole has the nerve to say this should be good because they’re both former Women’s Champions. I’m so glad we’re done with that era and have moved on to something a little more respectable.

The catfight is on with the chase going through the crowd, mainly focusing on shots of Sable’s shorts. Back in with Sable talking trash and slowly stomping in the corner. We hit the Grind over Stephanie, who grabs a rollup for a fast two. Sable gets in a good slap but Cole says we haven’t seen Stephanie’s yet. Stephanie gets in an elbow in the corner, followed by punches that make Shane McMahon’s look great.

They head outside again with the referee having to take a chair away from Stephanie. Back in and Stephanie hits the slap before mounting Sable for the horrible slaps. Sable’s face is rubbed into the mat and a Hennig necksnap takes her down again. Back up and Sable’s top is ripped apart so the referee gives her his shirt. Cue the A-Train to run Stephanie down, giving Sable the pin.

Rating: D+. That’s on a very sliding scale and they certainly tried. They were running around as fast as they could and didn’t bother trying to have anything resembling a match. That’s the right call here and given that it was relatively short, this was much more inoffensive than I was expecting. It’s certainly not good or anything but given what kind of a disaster this had the potential to be, I’ll take what I can get. I’m not sure what the point of no countout was though as it’s not like they’re going to get counted while running in the crowd (which wasn’t long in the first place).

Stephanie has to get helped out and for some reason gets an ovation.

We recap John Cena vs. Undertaker. Cena is on a roll (despite not really winning any major matches) and wanted a big match for his one year anniversary. He went on to beat up Orlando Jordan, who got the big sign of respect from Undertaker after the match. Cena started calling himself the real legend of WWE and you just don’t do that. Undertaker wasn’t happy and here we are.

John Cena vs. Undertaker

My goodness what that could have meant under different circumstances. Cena’s pre-match rap basically says Undertaker is old and Cena is awesome. The motorcycle seems to stall as Undertaker keeps fiddling with the key and the camera switches to Cena standing in the ring for a good while. Undertaker eventually walks down to the ring with the bike still on the stage, which is certainly better than the Hulk Hogan fiasco last year.

Undertaker drives him into the corner to start and Cena actually slaps him in the face. That earns him one heck of a toss and the beating is on early. They head outside with Cena getting tossed into the barricade but grabbing a drink of water to spit in Undertaker’s face. Amazingly enough that has no effect and Cena gets posted again. All Undertaker in the early going and the apron legdrop makes things even worse.

Back in and Undertaker drives some knees into the ribs as Cole says Undertaker has been doing this for eleven years. I mean, it’s closer to thirteen but Cole it’s better than the Women’s Title line from earlier. Old School and a chokeslam get two as Undertaker pulls Cena up. Cena escapes the Last Ride though and grabs a DDT for a much needed breather. With Undertaker down, Cena pulls off a turnbuckle pad, making me wonder why the referee isn’t watching Cena at the moment.

Back up and Undertaker elbows him in the face but charges into the exposed buckle. Cena knocks him off the apron and into the barricade for a thud and Undertaker is spitting up blood. They head back inside with Undertaker missing a jumping boot of all things but settling for two off a neckbreaker. Cena knees him in the back to cut Undertaker off again but Undertaker slips out of the FU.

A big boot and legdrop give Undertaker two and he switches to a choke on the mat in the corner. That seems like some major spot calling or just an awkward spot for some reason. Cena uses the distraction to hit him in the ribs with the chain, setting up the FU for two. There is really no logical reason for that not being the pin. Like really, none at all and it hurts the FU when it’s just becoming a big time finisher. Cena does the always stupid right hands in the corner and it’s the Last Ride for the pin.

Rating: B. They were getting somewhere but my goodness Undertaker shouldn’t have gone over. This should have been Cena’s chance to be launched into the main event but instead it’s just Undertaker pinning him after a ton of offense. If Cena can’t beat him while cheating and hitting his finisher, why would I want to see him fight again? Completely wrong ending to an otherwise good match.

We recap Vince McMahon vs. Zach Gowen, which seems to be a David vs. Goliath story but I’m still not sure what Vince gets out of this. It’s something about Vince wanting to screw Stephanie over but the story of Stephanie wanting to protect Gowen from Vince for the sake of Stephanie’s childhood innocent didn’t make sense. Anyway, Stephanie and Gowen one upped Vince and earned Zach a contract so Vince is giving him his first singles match because he wants real athletes and not half men in his company.

Vince McMahon vs. Zach Gowen

Vince casually backs him into the corner to start before wrestling him down and rolling around Gowen’s back. Some shots in the corner have Gowen in more trouble until he backdrops Vince over the top. An Asai moonsault and a middle rope Fameasser gives Gowen two, despite neither having much impact whatsoever.

Vince starts in on the good leg and Cole is RIGHT THERE to explain how much of a problem this could be for Zach. Never let it be said that WWE left you alone to figure something out on your own. The leg is wrapped around the post as Cole tries to explain the story behind the whole thing. We hit the half crab (not a leg hold but nice try) until Gowen makes the rope and scores with a dropkick.

Now it’s Vince’s getting crotched against the post and having his leg wrapped around the post. Cole: “Now the playing field is even!”. Not quite nimrod, but we’ll move on. Gowen hits a top rope bulldog and a middle rope dropkick. The moonsault gets two and now we’re just waiting on Gowen losing. Vince grabs a chair but gets it dropkicked into his face to draw a heck of a cut. Gowen misses the second moonsault though and Vince gets the easy pin.

Rating: D. They were trying as hard as they could here but there’s really not much you can do with this concept. Gowen has one leg and does a lot of impressive things for someone in his condition. I’ve seen it for a few weeks now and this time I saw him do it in long form against Vince. Then he doesn’t even win the thing? This is pretty much it for Gowen meaning anything and I have no idea what we’re supposed to care about him doing going forward as you can only watch this so many times. Yeah it’s an inspirational story, but it’s an inspirational story once, not four or five times now.

Gowen gets the big standing ovation and it’s lackluster at best. Tazz: “How many people get to say they’ve busted Vince McMahon wide open?” Uh, a fairly good amount actually?

Eddie says a victory is a victory and what happened to Benoit is his own fault.

We recap the World Title match. Brock Lesnar beat Kurt Angle to win the title at Wrestlemania in Angle’s last match for several months. Lesnar then feuded with Big Show for months but Angle is back and now Brock’s best friend. A three way feud ensued and it’s time for a triple threat. This gets the music video treatment.

Smackdown World Title: Brock Lesnar vs. Big Show vs. Kurt Angle

Brock is defending, there are no disqualifications and it’s one fall to a finish. Show has to clothesline the new best friends down and it’s a chokeslam for an early two on Lesnar. Angle can’t German suplex the giant but he can pick the ankle for the ankle lock. That’s kicked away though and a superkick drops Angle again. Lesnar dives in for a save before hitting a middle rope back elbow to Show’s jaw.

It’s Kurt bringing in the first weapons with some garbage can lids and a series of shots finally put Show down. He’s right back up with a double suplex though, only to have Angle and Lesnar chokeslam him down. Tazz: “So Big Show suplexes the guys who suplex and they chokeslam the guy who chokeslams???”. Score one for the Red Hook school system.

Angle gets knocked outside and the F5 on Show gets a delayed two with Angle pulling the referee to the floor. A shot to Angle’s head busts him open, leaving Show to load Brock up for a superplex. That’s countered into a good looking running powerbomb but Angle makes another save with a chair. Angle chairs both of them out to the floor but gets it kicked back into his face.

While a bleeding Lesnar is stuck on the other side of the ring, an Angle Slam puts Show through the announcers’ table. That leaves Angle and Lesnar in the ring for the big showdown with Lesnar throwing him over the top in a hurry. Brock gets whipped into the steps though and Angle is cut on the back of his head. Back in and Angle tosses Brock with a release German suplex, sending Brock onto his stomach for a great looking flip.

The Angle Slam is countered into a spinebuster for two but Angle slaps on a choke. Show comes back in for the save and covers both guys at once for two. A double chokeslam gets another pair of near falls but Lesnar kicks the monster low. Kurt grabs the ankle again, only to let go of Brock and Angle Slam Show. Another Angle Slam to Lesnar is enough for the pin and the title.

Rating: B+. This was a very well booked match as it felt like it took the two superheroes to deal with Big Show, leaving them to fight it out later. That’s exactly how you want something like this to go and they made it work quite well. Angle winning sets up another big match with Brock down the line and you can throw Show in there if you absolutely have to. Really strong match here and again, I get why Show was in there for a change as you don’t want to waste Angle vs. Lesnar II on Vengeance.

Overall Rating: B+. This is a heck of a show and if they had cut out some of the weaker stuff (like about eight minutes of Vince vs. Zach and the whole Billy vs. Jamie match), it could be an all time classic. The big stuff is very good, but the bad stuff (including some of the choices, mainly Undertaker winning) really holds it back. That being said, this show made Smackdown feel like what it used to be: the wrestling show, which is exactly the kind of thing it needs to be to feel different from Raw. Excellent show here and something that gives me a lot of confidence in Smackdown going forward.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

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Smackdown
Date: July 24, 2003
Location: Selland Arena, Fresno, California
Commentators: Tazz, Michael Cole

It’s the go home show for Vengeance and hopefully the improvements continue around here. The big story continues to be the McMahon family drama but the World Title scene is starting to heat up. There are a few other good things going on around here and I’m actually looking forward to the pay per view. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of last week’s handicap match with Kurt Angle defeating Big Show and the World’s Greatest Tag Team (albeit with some assistance from Zach Gowen).

Opening sequence.

Here’s Stephanie McMahon to get things going. She’s had a rough week but tonight she’s taking Smackdown back. Tonight’s main event will be Big Show/World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. Kurt Angle/Zach Gowen/Brock Lesnar. After some threats to Sable, here’s John Cena to interrupt. Cena had a dream about Stephanie last night and it had him standing at attention. He makes a bunch of jokes about her chest and gives Stephanie $20 to rip Sable’s top off. Cena: “I got this little fetish with nipples.”

What he’d really like to do is give her a spank though and Stephanie actually lets him, complete with bending over to help him out. Cena does in fact spank her but here’s Sable to interrupt, ending this week’s edition of “Stephanie is a sex symbol and we’re going to know about it”. She shows us a clip from last week’s messy brawl before bringing up Linda being attacked on Monday. Stephanie can worry about Linda though because Sable can take care of Vince. Chase is given and we take a break.

Back with Stephanie screeching about Sable and being told she’s in the parking lot.

Rey Mysterio/Billy Kidman vs. Matt Hardy/Shannon Moore

I wonder what Matt, who is considered sacred in Japan and defeated Mysterio and Kidman on consecutive pay per views, thinks of Stephanie’s spankability. Mysterio headlocks Matt to start before stopping a charge in the corner. Kidman adds a slingshot legdrop for two and it’s off to Shannon, who lured Kidman into a cheap shot from Matt.

For some reason the announcers debate whether Kamala was from the Himalayas until Matt gets two off a neckbreaker. The double teaming continues with Matt adding another forearm from the apron. We hit the double arm crank with Hardy’s boot in Kidman’s back. That’s broken up without much effort and the hot tag brings Mysterio back in. Things speed up in a hurry with Rey hitting the sitout bulldog.

Matt breaks up the 619, allowing Shannon to kick Rey in the chest to take him down. A sitout powerbomb plants Rey again to give Shannon two but Kidman is back in with a high crossbody. Matt breaks that up with a top rope legdrop but Rey hurricanranas him out to the floor. The 619 takes Shannon down and it’s the shooting star for the pin.

Rating: B. This took its time to get going but the last few minutes were excellent fast paced stuff. Mysterio and Kidman should be awesome as challengers to Haas and Benjamin on Sunday and if it’s given enough time, we could be in for a show stealer. I don’t think the titles are changing hands but at least it’s going to be fun while it lasts. That being said, the fact that I completely forgot Mysterio was Cruiserweight Champion until later in the show is a bad sign. Just don’t put the title on him if this is what you’re using him for.

Stephanie chases Sable, who was just standing there while Stephanie came running up. Of course Stephanie WON’T STOP SCREECHING, even as she rips Sable’s top off. Sable gets in the limo but Vince pops up to stop Stephanie from breaking the window. Vince won’t answer why he’s not at home taking care of Linda. They really aren’t hiding what they’re doing with Sable and Stephanie and it’s not working. Stephanie as the vicious fighter is rather laughable and they’re all but advertising that someone is losing clothes on Sunday. The screeching is ruining almost any positives about the whole thing though and that’s a problem.

Jamie Noble vs. Billy Gunn

Well at least it’s not at the pay per view. Nidia isn’t here tonight but it has NOTHING to do with Jamie offering Torrie money for sleeping with him. Billy charges in and hammers away before hitting his hiptoss into a neckbreaker (cool move). They head outside with Jamie sending him into the barricade. A Torrie distraction lets Billy grab a slam into a swinging Rock Bottom for the very fast pin. Now let this stupid thing be over.

Post match Jamie says he’s better than Billy in every way, including in bed. Torrie grabs the mic and says they can have a rematch at Vengeance and if Jamie beats him, she’ll sleep with Jamie. Right here on Smackdown next week.

Video on the Asia tour.

We see Torrie’s proposal again.

The A-Train comes in to see the APA, who invite him to the Bar Room Brawl. Brother Love, the Conquistadors, Tough Enough guys and the EASTER BUNNY will be there. A-Train: “Where I come from, we HATE the Easter Bunny.” A-Train doesn’t want Bradshaw’s new book and leaves. Cue the Brooklyn Brawler, who wants in so he can beat Doink up for whatever reason. Brawler has to prove himself tonight.

Cena is standing in a flaming pentagram and cuts a rather religious promo about how evil he’ll be on Sunday. This show is all over the place tonight.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for a chat. Before getting in the ring, Eddie polishes the low rider’s chrome for a bit (drawing the face pop of the night). In spite of the rest of this show, that’s not a euphemism for anything else. Eddie talks about being ready to face his best friend Chris Benoit on Sunday so here’s Benoit to interrupt. Benoit laughs off the idea of them being best friends because Eddie hasn’t called him in months. How many best friends does Eddie have?

Eddie laughs off the idea but it’s ok because he was just lying. After seeming to forget his lines, Eddie says he can’t stand Benoit and we go over their history together. Eddie is sick of being the second in command to someone like Benoit. That’s why he’s winning the US Title on Sunday. Benoit is ready to fight right now but Eddie uses the “on my time” excuse. Eddie tries a cheap shot but settles for blinding Benoit with the car polish, drawing a loud EDDIE chant. Rhyno comes out for the save and it’s time for a challenge. Eddie ignores him and plays with the polish bottle in a glorious moment. The match is finally made.

Eddie Guerrero vs. Rhyno

Joined in progress with Rhyno pounding on Eddie and cutting off a charge with a raised boot. A powerbomb into Snake Eyes gives Rhyno two and we’re off to an early chinlock. Rhyno slams him down and grabs the same hold. Eddie fights up and grabs a northern lights suplex for two but Rhyno comes back with a Crossface. It’s very odd seeing Rhyno wrestle as the heel here, just a few minutes after Eddie TRIED TO BLIND Benoit.

Eddie sends him outside for a slingshot dive to take over for the first time, much to the crowd’s delight. Back in and Eddie stands on Rhyno’s hair before soaking in the cheers. Rhyno is back up with a shoulder block for two, followed by a spinebuster for a very delayed near fall. Eddie is right back up with a super hurricanrana but has to avoid the Gore. That means a low blow to Rhyno with Eddie being smart enough to claim that he took one instead. The confused referee doesn’t seem to mind and counts the pin on Rhyno (with Eddie’s feet on the ropes just because).

Rating: B. Eddie is a national treasure and the company is smart enough to not even really try to push him as a full on heel. It says a lot when he’s so talented at being a villain that the fans can’t help but cheer him even more. This is some of the best stuff he’s ever done and it’s becoming more and more of a treat to see him every single week.

The APA visited the troops this week and invited Saddam Hussein to the Bar Room Brawl.

APA vs. FBI

Heel miscommunication leads to the Clothesline ending Palumbo in about thirty seconds.

Nunzio gets beaten up as well so here’s the Brawler to chair the APA down. The Bashams, the A-Train and Sean O’Haire come in to join on the beating.

Vince comes in to see Gowen but Lesnar and Angle make the save. You know, because the would-be hero needs to be saved from Vince.

Pay per view run down. This isn’t on the Network version, likely due to a music issue.

Big Show/World’s Greatest Tag Team vs. Kurt Angle/Brock Lesnar/Zach Gowen

Angle grabs a front facelock on Shelton before getting shouldered down. That’s enough of this wrestling stuff so Angle tosses Shelton with a suplex. Haas comes in and gets armbarred as well before Brock comes in for some hard shoulders in the corner. Lesnar tosses Gowen onto Haas and Benjamin, again making me wonder why I’m supposed to care about a glorified mascot.

Show tosses Gowen around and it’s back to Angle as everything breaks down. Cue Vince to chair Gowen in the good leg, leaving Angle and Lesnar to suplex/spinebuster Haas and Benjamin. Gowen is taken to the back and we go to a break. Back with Angle hammering on Show until Shelton makes a save. The jump over Haas onto Angle’s back gets two and it’s off to Big Show for a half crab.

Shelton’s superkick gets two but Angle throws Charlie down, allowing the hot tag off to Lesnar. More house is cleaned until Big Show kicks him in the face to slow things right back down. Everything breaks down again and the Angle Slam into the ankle lock has Show in trouble. Lesnar F5’s Charlie but breaks the hold by mistake, leaving Show to grab the chokeslam for the pin.

Rating: C. The match was starting to drag but thank goodness they got rid of Gowen so soon. It seems that they’re already realizing that there’s nothing there and it’s a big waste of time to pretend otherwise. The World Title feud has been well built, but have either Haas/Benjamin or Mysterio/Kidman mentioned that they’re fighting each other on Sunday? I don’t think either seem to realize it.

Lesnar mauls all three villains post match but gets in a fight with Angle. The distraction lets Show hit a double chokeslam to end the show.

Overall Rating: B. Vengeance is getting one of the oddest builds I’ve ever seen. The World Title match is perfectly fine, but the rest is this weird combination of stuff that makes me want to gouge my ears off (anything McMahon related) and outstanding stuff (anything Eddie does at the moment). Above all else though, there’s a ton of good stuff to look forward to on Sunday but at the same time, there’s a lot of stuff that feels like an excuse to torture us. The show was good though and I’m more interested in seeing the pay per view than I was, which is all this was supposed to accomplish.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6

Smackdown
Date: July 10, 2003
Location: Air Canada Centre, Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Attendance: 10,000
Commentators: Michael Cole, Tazz

We’re on the road to Vengeance and that means it’s time to start setting up a few things. We already have a triple threat main event for the World Title but I’m worried about what might be coming with the McMahons and Zach Gowen, especially now that Hogan is gone. Actually that could be an improvement, depending on what they do to replace him. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Gowen getting a contract last week. I’m sure nothing but good things will come of this.

Opening sequence.

Here’s Kurt Angle to open the show but Cole won’t stop talking about Gowen. Angle recaps the World Title picture and the triple threat at Vengeance. He’d love to get his title back and tells Big Show and Brock Lesnar to bring it on. Instead it’s John Cena answering to make gay jokes about Lesnar and Angle. He thinks his match with Undertaker is the real main event for the pay per view and Angle is just a joke. They’re like Terminator 3 and Angle is like a Legally Blonde sequel (I saw that in theaters and it wasn’t that bad).

Angle: “I didn’t think it was possible, but I think I’ve found someone in the company even whiter than I am.” Kurt talks about his wrestling skills and says he knows both versions. He’s great as an amateur, but sometimes he likes to kick it freestyle. Angle steals Cena’s hat and I think you know what’s coming. Tazz: “Oh no.” Cena laughs it off and says there’s no way he’s losing to a wannabe Kojak. Angle: “Ok I don’t even know what you just said.”

Kurt has Brian Hebner do the beat boxing and the rap talks about moving on up like the Jeffersons. Word. Cena: “THAT WAS FOUL!” The fans are rather pleased with Angle, even as Cena steals his hat back. Kurt hugs him because he majored in huganomics. Are we sure he’s not really Bayley’s dad? Angle and Cena go nose to nose but here’s Big Show to interrupt. The distraction lets Cena jump him from behind and hit an FU, followed by a chokeslam from Big Show. Angle as the goofy dork is always hilarious stuff.

FBI vs. Basham Brothers vs. Billy Kidman/Rey Mysterio vs. APA

#1 contenders match and one fall to a finish. The Bashams and FBI don’t even get entrances. Simmons (no longer Faarooq) and Palumbo start things off with Ron getting two off an early powerslam. Danny comes in and gets double teamed by the APA but Kidman tags himself in for a smart move.

Bradshaw decks Kidman for bothering him so Rey has to springboard in with a seated senton for a save. We actually hear about Mysterio and Kidman being former WCW Tag Team Champions, which isn’t a reign you often hear brought up. The APA and the FBI brawl to the back, making me wonder why this wasn’t an elimination match in the first place. Everything breaks down with the cruiserweights hitting double flip dives.

Back from a break with Danny holding Rey in a chinlock as we see the other teams brawling backstage. Mysterio gets a bulldog on Danny and the hot tag (minus the fans caring) brings in Kidman. In one of the most impressive feats of nonsense Cole has ever pulled off, he says that the Bashams beating this rookie team would be a huge upset.

So a team that won Tag Team Titles years ago are rookies and the Bashams, who are in a #1 contenders match, are so worthless that a win over some rookies would be an upset? I feel like I need a color coordinated chart to make sense of that. Kidman reverses Doug’s powerbomb but Shaniqua breaks up the shooting star press. The second attempt connects, but this time Danny makes a save. Rey tags himself in for the 619 and Drops the Time for the pin, albeit one kind of stolen from Kidman.

Rating: C. Not bad at all here with an ending that plants seeds for a likely Kidman heel turn. The other two teams didn’t really need to be there in the first place but I can understand the idea of not having the Bashams, who are already perennial losers, in a #1 contenders match on their own. That being said, what does it say when your four top contenders for the titles are a team who have never teamed together in this company, losers like the FBI, a team with three matches together and the reunited APA?

Angle is getting iced down when Brock Lesnar comes in. Kurt wants to know where Brock was but Lesnar says he just got here. Bickering ensues.

Here’s the full main event from last week, because this Zach Gowen/Stephanie McMahon combination is sweeping the nation.

It’s time for Gowen’s contract signing, with Stephanie, in a rather small and non-professional black outfit, coming out with said contract over her head like a boxing round card. Stephanie introduces Gowen and puts more energy into it than when Mr. America debuted. Gowen talks about how this is his lifelong dream and he has to thank Stephanie, Angle and Lesnar for their help. Above all else though, he needs to thank the fans for their love and support.

Gowen signs and here are Vince and Sable less than a second later. Vince mockingly praises Gowen before making Lesnar Big Show/Charlie Haas/Shelton Benjamin for later. As for Vengeance, it’s Vince vs. Gowen because this story deserves that kind of attention for whatever reason. Sable knocks Stephanie out with the clipboard (with a shot that wouldn’t have knocked down a five year old) to wrap things up.

Post break Sable and Vince celebrate in the back but Stephanie charges in and spears her over a couch, screeching about how much she hates Sable. Thankfully Vince cuts off that horrible ANGRY Stephanie voice to make Sable vs. Stephanie at Vengeance.

Matt Hardy/Shannon Moore vs. Chris Benoit/Rhyno

Matt, who lost his virginity at 17 and has never had earrings, gets punched in the jaw to start with Rhyno taking over on his own. Shannon gets in a shot to the back though and the villains take over. A Side Effect gets two and Shannon comes in for something like a cobra clutch. Rhyno fights up and hits a hot shot, setting up the hot tag to Benoit. That means German suplexes and a Swan Dive to Shannon but Matt grabs a quick Twist of Fate to cut him off. Rhyno Gores Matt down, leaving Benoit to grab the Crossface and make Shannon tap.

Rating: D+. Just a short match here as we continue the US Title tournament build. I’m still wondering when they’re going to have Benoit and Rhyno split for real as they teased it for a few weeks and then just forgot it. At least Benoit is doing something with the tournament though, which is better than being stuck in a low level tag team.

Angle tells Lesnar he has his back tonight so Lesnar will be ready for Vengeance.

Here’s Eddie Guerrero for a US Title tournament match. Before said match, Eddie wishes Tajiri a very sincere get well soon. Sometimes he loses his temper, which is what happened last week when they lost the titles and his car got banged up. That would be like touching his mamacita, which you just do not do. The fans cheer for Eddie, who says it’s time to look out for himself.

US Title Tournament First Round: Eddie Guerrero vs. Ultimo Dragon

This should be good. Dragon rolls him up to start and snaps off the rapid fire kicks to send Eddie outside. Back in and Eddie’s belly to belly gets two but Dragon kicks him outside, nearly banging the car up again. The car is fine though and Eddie comes back in, only to get hurricanranaed. He’s right back up though as Dragon tries a moonsault press, which is reversed into a small package (with a handful of tights) to give Eddie the pin.

Rating: D+. This needed another….oh I’d say ten minutes or so given the potential they had. I really don’t get the usage of Dragon either as he was brought in as a big deal, had a not great match with Shannon Moore, and then loses to Eddie in a three minute match. I’d hope they haven’t given up on him already but this isn’t a good sign.

Billy Gunn and Torrie Wilson almost get caught in the back by Earl Hebner. Torrie giggles it off in more bad acting.

Billy Gunn/Torrie Wilson vs. Nidia/Jamie Noble

Nidia tries to jump on Billy to start and gets flipped down. It’s off to Torrie for the catfight with Tazz being very interested in Torrie throwing chops. Cole has figured something out: both of these teams are dating. Tazz: “You’re a genius!” Torrie ends Nidia in short order with a DDT.

Post match Jamie offers $10,000 to sleep with him, earning a quick beatdown. Nidia tries for a save and loses her shorts.

Vince wants to see Angle in his office right now, meaning Kurt can’t accompany Brock to the ring.

Vengeance run down. Aside from the McMahons nonsense, it’s actually a good looking show.

Big Show/Shelton Benjamin/Charlie Haas vs. Brock Lesnar

This is also falls count anywhere. Before the match, Haas and Benjamin officially dub themselves the World’s Greatest Tag Team. I’ve heard worse names. We’re joined in progress with Brock throwing Haas and Benjamin around but Charlie breaks up an F5 on the floor. Big Show is nowhere to be seen as Brock takes Charlie inside and drives him into the corner.

Shelton offers a hand with a low bridge, allowing Show to pop back up with a chair shot for two on Lesnar. Things settle down a bit with Show working over Brock’s ribs and dropping a huge leg. Shelton comes in to jump over Charlie and onto Lesnar’s back for two more. We hit a waistlock for a big before Show comes back in for a bearhug.

Lesnar slips out and manages a belly to belly as everything breaks down. Show gets posted, an F5 drops Charlie and Shelton gets a belly to belly on the floor. Brock loads up the announcers’ table but Show saves Shelton from an F5 through said table. Instead it’s a chokeslam through the table to give Show the pin.

Rating: D. WAY longer than it needed to be here with Brock’s hope spots only working so well. The falls count anywhere thing didn’t add much to it either, save for the ending spot, which didn’t really need to be there. Show getting a pin gives him a little momentum heading into the pay per view, assuming they don’t waste it before we get there.

Overall Rating: D+. The problem here is the McMahon story, which isn’t interesting and is dragging the rest of the show down with it. I have no idea why they think Gowen is the be all and end all of interest, but hopefully it’s from a lack of anything else to do there. Mr. America might not have been good but at least he had some charisma. Gowen looks like he’s about fifteen years old, can’t talk and is little more than a novelty act yet he’s suddenly the big focal point of the top story on the show. Maybe the Hogan exit changed things but my goodness this isn’t doing much good.

The main event is more understandable as they’re pretty clearly setting up Lesnar vs. Angle for Summerslam and you don’t want to waste that big of a match at Vengeance. Putting Big Show in there is kind of annoying but in this case I understand why he’s there. He has history with both guys and I’d rather suffer through him again than waste someone young in a match they have no chance of either winning or getting to show off in.

Overall, this feels like the rough period we need to get through before we can move on to something interesting. Eddie turning heel and some of the singles pushes look good, plus Lesnar vs. Angle II should be fun. If they can tone down and scale back a lot of the McMahon drama, this show is a lot better in a hurry. As it is though, there’s only so much you can do with such a big mess in the middle.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up the Monday Nitro and Thunder Reviews Volume VI: July – December 1999 in e-book or paperback. Check out the information here:

http://kbwrestlingreviews.com/2017/11/22/new-book-kbs-monday-nitro-and-thunder-reviews-volume-vi/

And check out my Amazon author page with cheap wrestling books at:

http://www.amazon.com/Thomas-Hall/e/B00E6282W6