Impact Wrestling – March 1, 2019: The Setup Show
Impact Wrestling
Date: March 1, 2019
Commentators: Don Callis, Josh Matthews
The Las Vegas swing continues as we continue to build towards Rebellion. The big story coming out of last week was LAX seemingly turning heel by attacking and unmasking the Lucha Bros, though LAX was provoked. Other than that it’s the same World Title scene we’ve had for months now as Brian Cage is chasing the title with Moose and Killer Kross running around too. Let’s get to it.
Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.
Standard opening recap, meaning it’s well done.
Opening sequence.
Willie Mack vs. Jake Crist
Dave Crist is in Jake’s corner. Mack isn’t wasting time and Thesz presses Jake for some right hands. A swinging slam gets two as the fans are behind Chocolate Thunder. Jake sends him outside for a suicide dive, a flip dive and a diving tornado DDT for a good looking trio. Back in and Jake’s high crossbody is countered into a Samoan drop with a standing moonsault getting two. The Codebreaker connects but Dave shoves Mack off the top for the DQ at 3:23.
Rating: C. It was exciting while it lasted but you can only get so much out of a three minute match that existed to set up an angle. There’s something so engaging about Mack and that was on display here. The Crists are both very talented as well and they got to show it off in the limited ring time here.
Post match Tommy Dreamer (egads) comes out, saying he’s spent thirty years trying to write the wrongs of pro wrestling (Fan: “THEN WHY ARE YOU STILL WRESTLING?”). The match is on after the break.
Tommy Dreamer/Willie Mack vs. Crist Brothers
Tommy goes straight to the food from the crowd as we head inside for the opening bell. Some double elbows and a jumping legdrop get two on Jake and it’s time to start in on the arm. A blind tag lets Dave come in and it’s a top rope backsplash to Dreamer’s eternally injured back. The chinlock lasts even shorter than usual so Dreamer fails at a sunset flip attempt to keep himself in trouble.
An enziguri gives Jake two and it’s off to another quickly broken chinlock. With the holds not working, Jake goes up and gets superplexed right back down. Mack comes in to pick up the pace and the Stunner sends Jake outside. That leaves Dave to take a Death Valley Driver into the frog splash from Mack for the pin at 6:46.
Rating: D+. Dreamer comes in, does his Dreamer thing, and leaves. I’m glad Mack got a win, though you would think there would be a better choice to pair him with than Dreamer. At least he didn’t pin one of the Crists, even if he’s someone who doesn’t exactly offer much in terms of value, mainly due to him always being around in so many promotions.
Johnny Impact doesn’t like the implication that he’s handing out title matches as favors. The only reason Brian cage hasn’t gotten a title shot is the interference from Killer Kross and Moose. Just get rid of them and the title match is there.
KM/Fallah Bahh vs. Reno Scum
I didn’t get Scum back then and I don’t get them now. Adam Thornstone tries to slam Bahh for some reason and the pain is on in a hurry. KM comes in for some elbows in the corner but gets taken into the other corner so the beating can begin. A standing legdrop gets KM out of trouble and it’s back to Bahh for a running crossbody. Back to back rolls crush Luster and it’s a Rocket Launcher into a Samoan drop to finish Thornstone at 4:36.
Rating: D. Yeah I still don’t get them. Scum are two guys with an uninteresting look who don’t do anything in the ring that sets them apart. I’m not a fan of KM and Bahh either but they’re certainly better than what Scum was doing. They’re not a good team and I’m not sure why Impact brought them back in.
Post match Scum beats them up to try and get some heat.
Glenn Gilbertti annoys Ethan Page and runs into producer D’Lo Brown. He finally gets into the creative office and thinks we should have an X-Division tournament. The unseen creative laughs at him instead and sends him off for coffee. Gilbertti: “I’ve booked with Vince before!” Voice: “Wrong Vince!” I get the joke and laughter isn’t coming.
KM and Bahh want revenge.
United We Stand rundown.
GWN Flashback Moment of the Week: LAX defends the Tag Team Titles against Killshot/The Mack at Impact vs. Lucha Underground from last April.
Eli Drake congratulates Eddie Edwards on his win but says he won too. It was Eli drawing out the old Eddie last week and Eddie got a win. They can win the Tag Team Titles together but Eddie is fine with Kenny as his partner.
Scarlett Bordeaux’s in-ring debut is next week.
Tessa Blanchard vs. Delilah Doom
Fallout from Tessa attacking Delilah last week. It’s a fight to start with Doom hammering away and hurricanranaing her down. A top rope armdrag does it again but Tessa counters another hurricanrana into a sitout powerbomb. Tessa’s Saito suplex gets a delayed two as she’s not exactly intimidated here. A running elbow to the back misses though and Doom scores with a 619. Doom gets two off a crucifix bomb but Tessa powers her up and gets the Buzzsaw DDT for the pin at 5:00.
Rating: C-. This was a nicely done story with Tessa breaking a bit of a sweat against the newcomer, who got to show off a little bit here. There wasn’t much of a doubt here but at least they tried to make you believe that Doom could pull off the upset. Tessa is gearing up for her big showdown with Gail Kim though, which may or may not be the best idea.
Tessa says she’s getting her rematch for the title or else.
Cage says he can team with Impact if the World Title is the prize.
Rosemary is excited about the challenge for the war and tells Kiera Hogan to stay out of it. Kiera isn’t happy with that suggestion so Rosemary agrees to let her fight. But once Allie is back, they’re done.
Ethan Page vs. Zachary Wentz
Wentz flips out of a very early wristlock and Page isn’t sure what to do with this kind of speed. A handspring elbow is countered into something close to an F5 and a tilt-a-whirl faceplant gives Page two. The chinlock goes on so Wentz comes back with an enziguri into a shooting star for two of his own. Wentz’s dive is countered into a butterfly backbreaker of all things but Page stops to yell at the NFL alumni and gets in a shoving match with one of them. With Page distracted, Wentz hits a big springboard dive, followed by a springboard cutter for the pin at 4:55.
Rating: C. Match of the night so far though that’s not saying much. Wentz and the rest of the Rascalz are a fun team to watch and can have entertaining matches with anyone. Page isn’t bad either as I’m digging his stuff more often than not and this was no exception. Doing something with the NFL people is fine for a short story and I can’t imagine it’s going to be more than that.
Gilbertti talks to Dreamer and says he was hired as the new suckup. They find the Anthem owl and Dreamer throws him into a room with the thing. Gilbertti comes out and spits feathers.
Ace Austin is coming next week.
We recap Rich Swann vs. Sami Callihan, who were friends back in the day but now Swann wants nothing to do with him, including joining OVE. That’s not cool with Sami, who wants to be paid back by corrupting Swann like he does to everyone else.
Moose and Kross agree to work together. How many times have we heard something like this? Moose: “Tick friggin tock.”
LAX says they treated the Lucha Bros like they would treat anyone else that disrespects them. Konnan freaks out and says that’s not what he wanted so next week he’ll handle things. LAX better not screw it up.
Preview of next week’s show.
Moose/Killer Kross vs. Johnny Impact/Brian Cage
Kross and Cage slug it out to start with Cage picking him up for a backbreaker. Impact slingshots in with a legdrop and punches Kross into a corner for the tag off to Moose. That goes badly for Moose as well as he gets sent into the corner for some running elbows. A superkick into a gutwrench suplex sends Kross flying and we take a break.
Back with Moose’s rake of the eyes allowing the tag to Kross, who gets kicked in the face. The apron superplex sets up Impact’s breakdancing legdrop but Johnny stays on the mat, holding his neck. He’s fine enough to crawl over to Cage for the tag and it’s a spinebuster to plant Kross. Cage fights away but gets kicked out to the floor and here are the referees to check on Impact.
It’s enough of a distraction for Kross to hit Cage with the belt to bust him open. Back in and Moose hammers on the cut before dropping the backsplash for no cover. The bloody Cage gets pulled back to the corner as Johnny is checked on the floor. Cage and Moose trade clotheslines and Cage manages an F5 to Kross. Cue Taya Valkyrie to check on her husband as the Krossjacket Choke with a spear are enough to knock Cage out at 14:50.
Rating: C+. Again more storytelling than wrestling here, but the problem is how late they’ve waited to get to something interesting in the story. This feels like an Impact heel turn as Cage trusted him when he shouldn’t have and it allows Impact to avoid facing Cage again. Not a bad match at all though and it advanced the story, which was the point.
Impact is carried out and Cage is unconscious to end the show.
Overall Rating: C. This ranged from pretty lame to fine and that’s about what I’ve grown to expect from the regular shows around here. Some of the stories are moderately interesting but there’s not enough to make me want to see the show week to week. I would say there’s been more good than bad though and the big bad hasn’t been there, so at least things are stable instead of all over the place. In this case, that’s a great relief.
Results
Willie Mack b. Jake Crist via DQ when Dave Crist interfered
Tommy Dreamer/Willie Mack b. Crist Brothers – Frog splash to Dave
KM/Fallah Bahh b. Reno Scum – Rocket Launcher into a Samoan drop to Thornstone
Tessa Blanchard b. Delilah Doom – Buzzsaw DDT
Zachary Wentz b. Ethan Page – Springboard cutter
Killer Kross/Moose b. Johnny Impact/Brian Cage – Krossjacket Choke to Cage
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