Even More Incredible Battle Royals
Commentators: Booker T., Josh Matthews, Michael Cole, Gorilla Monsoon, Gene Okerlund, Lord Alfred Hayes, Ron Trongard, Vince McMahon, Rob Bartlett, Randy Savage, Lee Marshall, Bill DeMott, Nigel Sherrod

Oddly enough, I’ve had a lot of fun with the previous two entries in this series, as they’re just fun to watch. The best part is that a lot of these haven’t been seen in a long time, so they’re not exactly famous. That leaves you with some surprise entries and winners, which hopefully is the case again here. Let’s get to it.

From Smackdown, July 3, 2012.

Battle Royal

Alberto Del Rio, Kane, Jack Swagger, John Cena, Tensai, Damien Sandow, Daniel Bryan, Heath Slater, CM Punk, Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, Brodus Clay, Great Khali, Big Show, Ezekiel Jackson, Zack Ryder, Christian, Santino Marella, Justin Gabriel, Cody Rhodes

Teddy Long introduces this one, as the winner will be GM next week and that is a stacked lineup. Gabriel is out in a hurry and Show dumps Clay out as well. Tensai gets rid of Jackson and a bunch of people get rid of Khali to clear out a lot of the ring. There goes Sandow and Marella is out as well. Show shoves out Rhodes and Kingston at the same time and we take a break.

We come back with Slater and Swagger put out during the break before Punk’s crossbody gets rid of Bryan…and himself as well. Kane starts wrecking people, including a chokeslam to Show but he doesn’t bother getting rid of anyone. A bunch of heels go after Cena, who fights back and gets rid of Del Rio. Tensai goes after Cena but gets tossed, with Show throwing Cena out instead.

Ryder goes after Show for some dumb reason and gets hit with a spear. Kane tosses Show and Ziggler at the same time, leaving us with Ryder vs. Kane, which fits as Kane ruined Ryder’s life late last year. Ryder slips off the shoulder but gets kicked in the face, only to come back with the Broski Boot. The Rough Ryder is cut off but Ryder low bridges him out for the win at 10:49.

Rating: C+. They had some star power here and that helped a lot, but it was nice to see Ryder actually winning something for a change. The good thing is that Ryder only had to pull the rope down to get some revenge but that’s better than nothing. The bigger names were pretty much cleared out without much of a second thought, but that’s one of the perks of a match like this. Nice enough job here.

From Madison Square Garden, October 20, 1986.

$50,000 Tag Team Battle Royal

Moondogs (Rex/Spot), Rougeau Brothers (Jacques Rougeau/Raymond Rougeau), Dream Team (Brutus Beefcake/Greg Valentine), The Indians (Steve Gatorwolf/Chief Jay Strongbow), Hart Foundation (Bret Hart/Jim Neidhart), Mike Rotundo/SD Jones, Islanders (Haku/Tama), Nikolai Volkoff/Iron Sheik, Killer Bees (Jim Brunzell/Brian Blair), Machines (Super Machine/Big Machine), British Bulldogs (Davey Boy Smith/Dynamite Kid), King Kong Bundy/Big John Studd

If one member of a team is eliminated, their partner is out as well. The Moondogs are out in about ten seconds and it’s already time to slow down for the weak elimination attempts. Sheik has to save himself from a fireman’s carry and Beefcake is sent to the apron but not out. Studd is almost out but Bundy cuts that off in a hurry.

Rotundo and Jones are out, as are the Indians (and yes, that’s what their graphic said) to clear the ring a bit. Sheik is backdropped out and the Harts/Bulldogs go out, naturally brawling on the floor as they leave. The Machines are almost out, though the Bees are entirely out as things are managing to slow down even more.

Studd backdrops Jacques out and Beefcake follows him, leaving us with the Machines, the Islanders and Bundy/Studd. Bundy and Studd get rid of the Machines though and we’re down to two. Well four but whatever. Tama gets crushed by the Avalanche, which leaves Haku fighting two monsters on his own (I feel sorry for them). Haku slugs away at Studd but Bundy misses a charge and hits his own partner to knock Studd out, giving the Islanders the win at 10:33.

Rating: C-. So the action here was the usual drek, but DANG it was nice to see some actual tag teams for a change. The 80s was just loaded with tag teams and some of these would go on to be among the best of their era. This would have been even better like a year later, but this was a fun one for the names alone. Not a good match for the most part save for the hot ending, but fine for a house show special attraction.

From the AWA. There’s no date given but this would likely be late 1982 (it’s definitely after October 9, 1982 as Otto Wanz is billed as a former World Champion).

$50,000 Battle Royal

Jerry Blackwell, Ken Patera, Buck Zumhoffe, Greg Gagne, Hulk Hogan, Andre The Giant, Baron von Raschke, Bobby Heenan, Kevin Johnson, Tom Lintz, Jim Brunzell, Jacques Goulet, Brad Rheingans, Rick Martel, Bobby Heenan, Adnan Al-Kaissie, Ray Stevens, Adrian Adonis, Bobby Duncum, Otto Wanz, Nick Bockwinkel

Hogan is listed at 335lbs, which is huge for him. Also, since everyone got an individual entrance, I had time to think about something. This is billed as a $50,000 battle royal, with 18 entrants. Commentary said that the participants had put up money for the big prize. But then there was a surprise, as it was now a twenty person battle royal. Now at 18 entrants, $50k breaks down to about $2,777 each. So did the last two entrants have to pay as well and the prize was really about $55k? Or did they get in free? Or did the AWA just pocket the extra entry fees? No wonder they didn’t last.

Commentary says the battle royal is underway, then a few seconds later the bell rings, then a few seconds later the ring announcer says it’s begun. Geez people we can see the concept. Hogan is in early trouble as Andre beats on Patera, who is on the floor but I don’t believe out. There are multiple people on the floor but commentary is not exactly great at telling us who is out.

We get the five minutes in call at less than four minutes as this company can’t get anything right. Adonis hits Andre in the back for some annoyance as we’re told everyone is still officially in. Stevens is finally the first one out and Lintz is out, though Heenan manages to save himself. Patera dumps Johnson as we’re told it’s ten minutes in before it’s even nine. Goulet is out and Adonis goes up top to forearm Raschke, which is quite the odd pairing. Raschke is out soon after and Zumhoffe joins him (good) as Gagne and Adonis fight on the floor without being eliminated.

Rheingans is out and Adonis goes up top again for some reason, with Andre slamming him down. Wanz is out, as is Adonis (billed as the Golden Boy, which is so bizarre given what he would become) and we get a bunch of people almost going out on the same rope before getting back in. Martel is out and things slow down again. We settle down to Heenan and company against the good guys, with Hogan and Andre picking up Gagne and Brunzell to kick various villains away (that’s a visual).

We’re told it’s fifteen minutes in (no) as Brunzell is tossed by Blackwell and Duncum. There goes Gagne and the villains split off to triple team Hogan and Andre in different corners. Hogan is sent through the ropes to the floor, where the beating continues. Andre fights out and gets rid of Blackwell and Al-Kaissie, plus Duncum.

Heenan comes off the top with an ax handle to save Bockwinkel and eliminates himself to avoid Andre… who goes over the top to eliminate himself as well. That leaves Patera and Bockwinkel to double team Hogan, who sends them into each other. Hogan backdrops both of them out to win (and jump up and down in celebration) at 19:52.

Rating: C. I’m not a big AWA guy for the most part, but they have a certain charm about them that was on display here. If nothing else, having Heenan running around trying to run things and then eliminating himself with quite the athletic jump was a great bonus. This had the usual share of standing around, but it’s fun to see such a different version of this kind of match from a promotion that doesn’t get a lot of attention.

From Monday Night Raw, February 15, 1993 (this was on the Invasion Of The Bodyslammers Coliseum Video, albeit with different commentary, so I’ve seen it far too many times).

Battle Royal

Owen Hart, Koko B. Ware, Kamala, Kim Chee, Shawn Michaels, Iron Mike Sharpe, Bob Backlund, Typhoon, Razor Ramon, Damien Demento, Berzerker, Terry Taylor, Skinner, Tito Santana, Tatanka

It’s a big brawl to start and for some reason almost everyone is on one side of the ring. Michaels backdrops Ware out (in a great bump) as commentary talks about Tatanka beating Michaels on Superstars (which I actually watched earlier tonight). Typhoon gets rid of Skinner and Demento is out as well as this is not exactly flying thus far. Berzerker gets rid of Hart but is tossed out by Backlund.

Chee helps Typhoon eliminate Kamala, which just seems like a bad idea. Indeed as Kamala goes back inside to chop Chee and chase him through the crowd and into the concourse as we take a break. We come back (it’s kind awesome that we get to see the stuff in the break on the Coliseum Video) with Kamala chasing Chee through the balcony. Back in the ring, Typhoon gets backdropped over the corner for the elimination and we’re down to Michaels, Ramon, Santana and Tatanka, which breaks down into one heck of a tag match.

Michaels unloads on Tatanka in the corner and Ramon seems to knee Santana low. Santana is back up with the flying forearm and Michaels hits Tatanka with a dropkick. Michaels is sent onto the corner and the good guys kick him out at the same time to get us down to three. And here’s the Giant Gonzalez to knock Ramon through the ropes and throw the other two over before leaving. Ramon climbs back in and wins at 13:32.

Rating: D+. I love the tape and I’ve seen it quite a few times, but yeah this isn’t very good. It’s a few stars with a bunch of filler names and then Gonzalez coming in to wreck everyone at the end. The Kamala chase was funny, but that’s about the only entertaining part. It’s not a terrible match, but it’s pretty boring (until the final four) and that’s worse.

From the AWA, Saint Paul, Minnesota, February 7, 1989.

AWA World Title: Battle Royal

Sgt. Slaughter, Larry Zbyszko, Tom Zenk, Ken Patera, Steve Ray, Greg Gagne, Colonel DeBeers, Ricky Rice, Wayne Bloom, Wahoo McDaniel, Pat Tanaka, Mike Enos, Manny Fernandez, Akio Sato, Derrick Dukes, Mike George, Paul Diamond, Tommy Jammer

For the vacant title. It’s the usual start and there are no entrances here so good luck figuring out who all is in this. This means a lot of choking and brawling near the ropes, with the only interesting note being Diamond Dallas Page on the floor as a manager for apparently three or four people. Jammer is out and Enos (with his very 80s jeans) is as well, followed by I believe George (commentary is useless).

Fernandez is knocked out and a running clothesline gets rid of….someone commentary doesn’t bother to name. Patera is out and Fernandez is back in, as commentary apparently doesn’t get the difference between IN and OUT. DeBeers can’t get rid of Slaughter but someone can get rid of Sato. Fernandez is actually out and a bunch of people are tossed at once. We’re down to Zbyszko, Zenk, Gagne, Tatanka, DeBeers and Slaughter, with Gagne going up top like a moron and missing a top rope stomp.

Gagne is thrown out shortly thereafter and Zenk is on the floor but not out. Slaughter gets rid of Tanaka and DeBeers but gets tossed by Zbyszko. So we’re down two Zenk and Zbyszko as DeBeers brawls with Slaughter. And apparently this is now a regular match, as Zenk hits an atomic drop for two. Zbyszko slams him for two but gets sent hard into the corner. The referee gets bumped (oh sweet goodness) and Zenk hits his dropkick for an incredibly delayed two. A suplex gets two more but Zenk’s crossbody is thrown over the top rope to give Zbyszko the title at 15:38.

Rating: D-. This was a perfect illustration of why the AWA was dying. You had a bunch of people who didn’t feel like stars having an awful battle royal with the ending not really making sense. There was nothing to see here and it was a total mess, which explains the AWA in a nutshell: yeah it existed, but why would you want to watch it?

From the Global Wrestling Federation (early 90s promotion in Dallas), sometime in 1992.

$2000 Bunkhouse Battle Royal

Alex Porteau, Stevie Ray, Booker T, Chaz, Johnny Mantel, Gary Young, Black Bart, Shawn Summers, Rod Price, Scott Putski, Steven Dane, Tug Taylor, Maniac, Dewey, Terry Sill

You can win by over the top or pinfall and….my goodness this place does not have the best looking roster. Price is thrown out and pulls Young with him to get us down to thirteen. Chaz and Dane are both out and Booker beats up Tug Taylor as the Maniac (he’s a bit off) eliminates himself. Booker pins Dewey (I think?) before Summers, Taylor and Putski are all out. Mantel chokes Ray in the corner until Booker makes the save as Bart eliminates Sill. Porteau is out and we’re down to four as we take a break.

We come back with Booker and Ray in stereo chinlocks (in a BATTLE ROYAL) but they fight up…and get pulled back down into the chinlocks. Those are broken up so Ray grabs his own chinlock as I’m amazed at how bad these people are at this stuff. Bart fights up and ties Ray in the ropes while Booker skins the cat to save himself. Ray is back up and tosses Bart and Mantel…meaning Ray and Booker both win at 10:14.

Rating: F. Chinlocks. Multiple chinlocks. In a battle royal. I have no idea how this is the best way they could go, but it offers a good illustration of why this promotion is not exactly remembered positively. This was absolutely nothing and I don’t even get the ending, which wasn’t explained in any way and made a bad match even worse.

From Deep South Wrestling, the disaster of a developmental territory which did produce some good WWE talent, likely in 2005.

Battle Royal

Mike Mizanin, Mike Knox, Mike Shane, Todd Shane, Freakin Deacon, Palmer Cannon, Eric Perez, Nick Mitchell, Roughhouse O’Reilly, Antonio Banks, Mack Johnson, Derek Neikirk, Damien Steele, Kid Kash, Ryan Reeves, Mike Taylor, Joe Slaughter, Johnny Slaughter, Ray Gordy, Tony Santarelli, ???

For a bye in the first round of the Deep South Title tournament and one of the twenty one entrants are never named. Everyone goes after the Regulators (Shane and Shane) to start as commentary is rather hard to understand. One Shane saves the other from a group elimination and Roughhouse O’Reilly (Konnor of the Ascension) has to save himself. Todd Shane is thrown out and Mike Shane follows him as we’re now able to focus on anything else.

The Deacon (Luke Gallows) gets in front of Cannon as everyone tries to charge, with the Deacon eliminating four people in a row. Cannon bails to the floor so Deacon dives onto a bunch of people at once. A bunch of people get rid of Deacon as Cannon is now hiding underneath the ring.

We take a break and come back with Cannon hiding on the floor again as the brawl continues inside. A man in green gets enziguried out but chases Cannon back inside rather than leaving like he should. Well no wonder Cannon ran from that rulebreaker. Everyone looks at Cannon, who dives over the top to eliminate/save himself. Banks (the future MVP) is out and we get down to a bunch of brawling on the ropes. Johnson and Mitchell are eliminated and we take another break.

We come back with nine entrants remaining and the fans behind Reeves (the future Ryback) as someone not important enough to name is tossed. Steele sends Kash to the apron, only for Kash to dump him out. Neikirk has to save himself from being very close to an elimination and O’Reilly is put on the apron. Neikirk and Kash get together to eliminate Reeves and O’Reilly and we’re down to five as we take another break.

We come back with Miz and Taylor staring down with Team Elite (Neikirk, Kash and Knox). Miz gets double teamed in the corner but Kash turns on Knox with a hurricanrana. That earns him a boot to the face from Knox, allowing Taylor and Miz to…not eliminate him. Knox is back up with one heck of a chop to Miz in the corner and they pair off again. Taylor’s hurricanrana takes Kash to the apron but not out, leaving Miz to DDT the other two at the same time.

Taylor and Kash hit a double clothesline and everyone is down. Miz and Taylor are back up to take over on the villains but Taylor misses a charge and gets booted out. That leaves Miz on his own against the three villains, who quickly sends him to the apron to start. Miz manages to pull Kash halfway down though and the other two toss Kash out to get us down to three. Kash grabs at Miz from the floor so here is Taylor to go after him as well. Knox and Neikirk double team Miz but he skins the cat and headscissors Neikirk out. Knox pump kicks Miz in the face for the win at 40:30.

Rating: B. Well DANG that came out of nowhere. I was expecting absolutely nothing here and they wound up having one heck of a match in the end. The last ten minutes or so with Miz and Taylor fighting against the monsters worked great and I wanted to see how they were getting out of it. The time made it work well too, as this had no reason to go this long but they made it work and did something rather good. Nice job here and FAR better than I was expecting.

Overall Rating: D+. Well the winning streak ends at two, as the Deep South match wasn’t enough to make this work. That stretch of the 1993 match, the AWA mess and the horrible Global match dragged this WAY down. There wasn’t much to see here, with the opener and finale being good but not worth your watch. Go and check out the other two entries in the series as they’re a good bit better.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Smackdown
Date: October 10, 2008
Location: Spokane Arena, Spokane, Washington
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

Things have gotten interesting around here as Jeff Hardy’s rise to the top has stalled again, this time after a loss to HHH in a heck of a title match at No Mercy. HHH isn’t getting a breath though as he is defending the title against Big Show this week. That makes sense as Big Show defeated the Undertaker at the pay per view so let’s get to it.

Here is No Mercy if you need a recap.

The opening video looks at Big Show wrecking Undertaker at No Mercy and beating him via KO. Undertaker’s eyes looked gone and that was quite the visual.

Opening sequence.

Vickie Guerrero, with Chavo Guerrero, is in the ring to get things going. She rants about how two weeks ago, she wasn’t wearing her neck brace until she was brutally and SAVAGELY attacked by the Undertaker. She can still hear the sounds of her vertebrae compressing and TO THIS DAY, she can feel the pain going down her spine (you can imagine the crowd’s reactions).

But then at No Mercy, Undertaker got his when he was dominated and humiliated by Big Show. That’s why Show is challenging HHH for the World Title tonight, which brings Show out to join us. Show has heard the fans cheering for the Undertaker and it meant nothing compared to his fist. We see what is either the same video from the opening or something close enough to it that it doesn’t matter before Show brags about knocking out a bunch of people.

As for tonight, HHH is going to know exactly what hits him and Show will be the new champion. Cue Vladimir Kozlov, who makes it clear that he’s coming for whomever leaves with the title. Show recommends against that due to the whole “I’m a giant” thing, plus he’s an AMERICAN (oh geez). And that’s how it ends, which is probably for the better.

Brie Bella vs. Natalya Neidhart

Victoria is here with Natalya. They go straight to the mat to start with Bella hammering away. Back up and Bella slips off the ropes but is right back up with a bunch of forearms in a nice recovery. Natalya blasts her with a heck of a discus clothesline but Bella gets in a quick two off a sunset flip.

That’s enough for Bella to try her dive underneath the ring, though Victoria cuts her off. Well she cuts her off for a bit, as Hornswoggle pops her up to chase Victoria away. Brie comes out from the other side of the ring but then goes back under, popping out from the other side faster than humanly possible. Natalya is so confused that she gets crucifixed for the fast pin.

Rating: C. Yeah we get it. They’re pretty much this close to revealing the thing with Bella and there’s not much point to keeping it a secret any longer. We get the idea now and while it’s clever, it isn’t something that feels like it has the longest shelf life. That being said, it might be nice to have something different in the division, which is still coming together.

We look at John Cena’s neck injury at Summerslam and his ensuing surgery.

Funaki is practicing his interviews when R-Truth comes in to say Funaki needs a microphone. R-Truth wants to get to know him a bit better, including his full name. As it turns out, Funaki’s middle name is Fu, his last name is Naki, and his first name is….Kung. R-Truth can go with that and sings a modified Kung Fu Fighting, complete with various rhymes about Funaki and Japan. Oh dear. Oh dear indeed. No, this isn’t on the Peacock version.

HHH is voting on the guest referee for Chris Jericho vs. Batista when Jeff Hardy comes in. Hardy thought they had an amazing match and praises HHH for retaining. He even wishes HHH luck tonight, but he’s coming for the winner either way.

R-Truth vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title and before the match, Benjamin says that in these rough economic times, you can still bet on gold. Yeah this gimmick is still horrid. Benjamin drives him into the corner to start, with some knees and forearms putting R-Truth down. They go outside to keep up the beating but R-Truth manages to fight back inside. One heck of a clothesline gives Benjamin a delayed two and we hit the chinlock. This one stays on for a good while until R-Truth suplexes his way to freedom for two of his own. R-Truth’s spinning forearm gets two more so Benjamin tries a tilt-a-whirl, which is reversed into a cradle to give R-Truth the fast pin.

Rating: C. I’m not big on the idea of a champion losing like this but it’s a fast way to make R-Truth feel like a bigger deal. That could take him somewhere sooner than later and it’s not like Benjamin’s title reign has meant much in the slightest. The match wasn’t much to see, though the ending was a nice surprise.

Jeff Hardy vs. MVP

During MVP’s entrance, Gregory Helms pops up, begging MVP to actually win a match. Apparently MVP gets a big bonus if he wins one more match, which is a logical enough incentive. They fight over a small package to start with MVP taking him down for some near falls. Hardy is back up with a knockdown but it’s way too early for the Swanton, with MVP bailing out to the floor as we take an early break.

We come back with MVP firing off some knees to the chest, followed by a knee drop for two. The seated abdominal stretch has Hardy in more trouble and a waistlock keeps him down. Hardy fights up but can’t break the hold, with MVP ramming him into the corner in a smart move. In traditional wrestling logic though, Hardy gets out even faster and hits the Whisper In The Wind for two of his own, followed by a dropkick into the corner. There’s the slingshot dropkick to the chest, followed by another to the back for a bit of a twist. The Swanton finishes MVP off.

Rating: C+. Well, this was about as good of a match as you were going to have when so much of it was spent with MVP working on the bad ribs. That’s a case where it made sense but might not have been the most interesting situation. Hardy does at least get a win back after Sunday, which he needs if he’s staying in the title picture. At the same time, MVP is not going to be thrilled by his loss, which could lead to a fun chase as he tries to get that last win.

Post match Vladimir Kozlov comes out and goes after Hardy, who is quickly headbutted out of the air.

Video on HHH.

We go to a carnival and meet Kizarny, who speaks carny and is coming to Smackdown. Ok then.

Jesse & Festus/Colons vs. Kenny Dykstra/Ryan Braddock/Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

This seems to exist as an excuse to get Maria, serving as guest ring announcer, on the show and….well it makes sense. Gregory Helms pops up to mock Dykstra’s team for not being the most intimidating. Festus clears the ring at the bell, as tends to be his custom but Carlito starts by springboard moonsaulting Hawkins for an early two.

Ryder comes in for a kick to the back and the villains start taking turns on Carlito. Dykstra’s middle rope ax handle gets two and some elbows to the neck set up a chinlock. Carlito fights out again and brings Festus in for the house cleaning, including a running seated senton to Dykstra. Everything breaks down and Braddock is sent outside, leaving Festus to hit the fireman’s carry flapjack for the pin on Dykstra.

Rating: D+. Again, there was no reason for this match to exist save for I’m guessing having Maria on TV. It’s not like these people (including the Tag Team Champions) have much going on at the moment and putting them in an eight man tag which barely ran three minutes isn’t going to do much to fix things. Just a quick match here and nothing important.

Post match Festus kind of stalks Maria, with Jesse getting him out of there.

We look at Big Show knocking out various people.

John Cena came to Smackdown the day of his surgery. In case you thought he was normal at any point.

Great Khali vs. ???/???/???

Before the match, Runjin Singh recaps Khali’s issues with Johnny Knoxville and kissing Lilian Garcia on Raw. Two of the three guys run away and the third is chopped for the pin in about fifteen seconds.

Post match Khali does the Kiss Cam again and kisses a woman who is a big bigger, with Singh asking for her weight but then dropping it. Khali eventually kisses her and poses.

Raw Rebound.

We look back at Jeff Hardy beating MVP but getting taken out by Vladimir Kozlov.

Kozlov is ready to destroy Hardy next week.

Smackdown World Title: HHH vs. Big Show

HHH is defending. We get the Big Match Intros until HHH ducks a shot in the corner and slugs away to no avail. Show sends him outside but misses a charge into the post to actually stagger him. Back in and the side slam plants HHH in a hurry and we take a break. We come back with HHH in a neck crank and getting cranked for a long time. The standing legdrop gives Show two but he misses a charge into the corner.

HHH jumps on his back for the sleeper, which still won’t put Show down. The facebuster doesn’t work either and the Pedigree is countered into an Air Raid Crash. The big right hand misses so Show goes with the chokeslam to drop HHH instead. Show loads up the punch again but the lights go out and the Undertaker is here to brawl with Show to the back. And that’s the match.

Rating: C. Well that was just kind of a way to keep Undertaker vs. Show going and that’s not the most thrilling way to go. If nothing else, it would be nice to have Undertaker sell the beating from No Mercy. Otherwise, it just makes the whole thing seem like an annoyance which didn’t do anything to Undertaker long term. It was a way out of the title match though, and at least Show didn’t lose his momentum so soon after looking dominant at the pay per view.

Post match Vladimir Kozlov comes out and brawls with HHH, even dropping him with a headbutt to the chest. Jeff Hardy runs in and helps HHH clear him out…and then drops HHH with the Twist Of Fate. A staredown with Kozlov ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. I wasn’t exactly feeling this one as the wrestling was just ok and it was much more about setting things up for later. Kozlov is one of the new big bads around here and I’m not sure how well that’s going. He’s not very interesting and Show going with the American thing isn’t a great sign. In other words, it feels like another roadblock to Hardy getting the title, which is what the fans want to see right now. The rest of the show wasn’t much to see and hopefully that gets better. I’m not exactly certain it will with Kozlov as a focus, but the power of Hardy is strong.

 

 

Remember to follow me on Twitter and Bluesky @kbreviews and head over to my Amazon author page with 30 different cheap wrestling books at:

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Royal Rumble 2012
Date: January 29, 2012
Location: Scottrade Center, St. Louis, Missouri
Attendance: 18,121
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Booker T

This is a show that I remember liking at the time but aside from the ending to the Rumble itself, almost nothing springs to mind about the show. I’m curious to see what that means as this was kind of a weaker time for the company. Hopefully they can make this work, as the Rumble can be all over the place. Let’s get to it.

The opening video features a bunch of people saying they want to win the Royal Rumble and a voiceover asking who is going to Wrestlemania.

Smackdown World Title: Daniel Bryan vs. Mark Henry vs. Big Show

Bryan is defending in a cage and Cole cannot stand him. Also Bryan is mad at Show for running over his girlfriend AJ Lee, though it isn’t clear if it was a setup. Bryan gets sent into the corner to start, leaving Show to splash Henry against the cage. For some reason Bryan tries to kick at Show, who throws him against the cage for his efforts. The WMD hits cage, with Bryan dropkicking the leg out to take over.

Bryan kicks away at Henry as well but it’s way too early to escape the cage. Henry: “CLOSE THAT DOOR!” Bryan gets slingshotted into the cage but Show is back up with a superkick. That leaves Show to go after Bryan, with the big slow shots in the corner keeping Bryan down. Henry is back up to go after both of them as commentary discusses Bryan and AJ’s relationship.

Henry misses a charge into the cage and gets speared by Show to give Bryan two. Bryan’s tornado DDT plants Show (which has Lawler far too impressed) and the LeBell Lock goes on. Henry breaks that up but gets caught with the WMD. Bryan tries to escape and gets over, but Show grabs his hand. Show basically does some curls with Bryan, who eventually falls down to retain the title at 9:08.

Rating: C+. This was a nice story with Bryan having to escape from the two monsters who were basically playing with him. Bryan was still trying to get everything together at this point, as he certainly had the skill but he was making his transition into being a main event star. That took some time, mainly due to winning the title via the Money In The Bank briefcase, but that has been an issue with the concept for a long time. The match was entertaining though, even with Bryan almost retaining by accident.

Video on John Cena, who won’t change who he is, even as we hear from some fans who are on either side. We also see a bunch of his promotional work for WWE and my goodness the build to his match vs. Rock was outstanding. It makes me want to watch it again, so they’re doing something right.

Beth Phoenix/Bella Twins/Natalya vs. Kelly Kelly/Eve Torres/Alicia Fox/Tamina

Natalya headlocks Tamina down to start but it’s off to Eve for a dancing moonsault. Phoenix comes in and gets clotheslined down so Brie can come in for a chinlock. This lets commentary compare Twitter followers until Eve gets up for the tag off to Fox. The chinlock goes on again but Eve fights out and hands it off to Kelly. The screaming headscissors ensues and everything breaks down. Kelly gets beaten down on the floor and everyone joins in, allowing Kelly to get up top for a big dive onto the pile. Back in and Brie kicks Kelly in the face, allowing the Glam Slam to finish Kelly at 5:28.

Rating: D+. It’s a bad sign that the best thing you can say about a match is “at least it was short” but that’s about all this one had. The women’s division was not in a good place at this point, with Phoenix being one of the few bright spot. There were talented people in this match, but it doesn’t matter if they don’t get to do anything.

We recap Kane vs. John Cena, which has seen Kane being the unstoppable monster and wrecking Zack Ryder, who has come off like a total loser in the whole thing. Kane has left him in a wheelchair as well as the US Title, likely because Ryder got over on his own.

Ryder, in a wheelchair and a neck brace, arrives with girlfriend Eve Torres joining him. Johnny Ace is here too and mocks both of them a bit, with neither being impressed.

Kane vs. John Cena

Kane fires off the uppercuts to start but Cena is back up with a running clothesline. That’s enough to send them outside, with Cena whipping him knees first into the steps. Kane slugs him right back down inside and sends him into the corner, setting up a chinlock. The comeback is cut off with another uppercut and a bulldog attempt is casually shoved away.

A neck snap across the top rope doesn’t get Cena very far either, as Kane drops him again. The smother hold is countered into an STF, which is countered into a side slam to drop Cena again. The top rope clothesline connects and a big boot gives Kane two, meaning it’s frustration time. Kane’s superplex is broken up and it’s a super Five Knuckle Shuffle but the AA is broken up as well. They fight outside and that’s enough for a rather lame double countout at 10:57.

Rating: C-. This was a bad time for Cena, as he had the biggest match of his career coming up in a few months, but that didn’t leave him with much to do on the way there. That was on full display here, as this feud with Kane went on for a long time and never felt important in any way. Throw in the ending being about setting up a rematch and it was even worse.

Post match they brawl into the back with Kane being sent into various things. Kane comes back with a chair and breaks into Zack Ryder’s private room, knocks Ryder out, and kidnaps him. They go into the arena, where Kane Tombstones him, even with Eve Torres watching. Cue Cena for the save but Kane gives him a chokeslam and leaves everyone laying.

Video on The Rock, who is one of the world’s biggest movie stars. And he’s handsome. And charismatic. And did I mention a star?

Brodus Clay vs. Drew McIntyre

Clay dances to start, gets clotheslined in the corner, suplexes McIntyre and What The Funk finishes at 1:04. Sweet goodness him getting away from WWE was the absolute best thing he could have gone.

We recap CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler for the former’s Raw World Title. This is more about Punk vs. Johnny Ace, who Punk can’t stand for being such a miserable failure at everything. Ace caused Ziggler to pin Punk to earn the title shot and made himself guest referee. He’s guaranteed that he’s going to screw Punk over, which has officially put him UNDER REVIEW, which has him backpedaling. Oh and Ziggler is here too. The last part of the video features Ziggler saying not to forget him. It’s not a great look but here we are.

Raw World Title: CM Punk vs. Dolph Ziggler

Ziggler, with Vickie Guerrero, is challenging and Johnny Ace is guest referee. Hold on though as Ace says he’ll be the outside referee with a regular referee in the ring. Actually hold on again as Ace tosses Vickie, which follows a previously established stipulation. The threat of a GTS has Ziggler worried to start so Punk knocks him into the corner. Punk grabs an abdominal stretch and hammers on the ribs before sending him outside.

The dive misses though and Ziggler takes over back inside, including the jumping elbows. The sleeper goes on for a bit before the running Fameasser is countered into a sitout powerbomb. Punk hits a running neckbreaker but Ziggler reverses a high crossbody into a rollup for two. The top rope elbow gets two more but the referee gets bumped, which you knew was coming.

Punk grabs the Anaconda Vice for the tap, though Ace is checking on the referee. A rollup gets the same treatment so Punk goes after Ace, only for Ziggler to knock Punk into Ace. The GTS connects but Ace still won’t count, saying Punk jumped him on purpose. Another GTS is countered into a Fameasser (that was great) for two and they’re both down. Back up and Punk hits a second GTS for the pin, with both referees counting the three at 14:32.

Rating: B-. These two worked well together, though Ace being boring and unfair was quite the negative. The whole feud was built around the idea that Ace wasn’t interesting and they made that quite clear here. It was a good match, which shouldn’t be a surprise, but just drop the Ace stuff already.

Rumble by the Numbers:

30 Superstars
1 winner
31 Hall of Famers in the Rumble
21 main events those Hall of Famers have been in at Wrestlemania
695 entrants who have been eliminated
39 entrants eliminated by Michaels, a record (Kane is second at 35)
13 consecutive Rumbles for Kane
11 eliminations for Kane in 2001
194,107lbs that have been in the Rumble, or over 97 tons, or 430 Big Show
421,883 people who have attended the Rumble
62:12 Rey Mysterio spent in the Rumble in 2006, a record
3 wins for Austin
1 second that Santino lasted in 2009
2 women who have competed in the Rumble
1, the entrant that has produced the same amount of winners as #30 at two each
27, the entrant with more winners than any other at four
55 percent of winners that have won the title at Wrestlemania

Royal Rumble

Two minute intervals. Miz is in at #1 and Alex Riley (Miz’s former goon) is in at #2. They stare at each other to start and Riley goes after him but misses a charge. Miz stomps him down to start and gets the pretty easy elimination. R-Truth is in at #3 and hammers away, including a kind of powerslam. That’s enough to throw Miz to the apron but not out as Cody Rhodes is in at #4.

A Beautiful Disaster hits R-Truth and the double teaming is on, with R-Truth getting knocked down into the corner. Justin Gabriel is in at #5 and goes after Rhodes as the four of them pair off. We get a pair of brawls in the corner until Primo is in at #6 to continue a not so star studded start. R-Truth hits the running forearm on Rhodes but gets tossed by Miz, who goes to the floor (under the bottom rope) to go after him. That means a Little Jimmy to drop Miz on the floor while the other three are still inside. Mick Foley is in at #7 and tosses Primo before continuing the brawling.

Ricardo Rodriguez is in at #8, complete with Alberto Del Rio’s music, gear, and…that’s about it, as he drives out in a banged up car (bad paint, ugly seat covers, trash bag for a window) and isn’t in the best condition. Naturally the fans love him, even as Foley drops him with a right hand. Foley and Rodriguez actually get together to eliminate Gabriel and it’s Santino Marella in #9. Marella starts in with his usual and gets rid of Rodriguez. That leaves Marella vs. Foley so yes we do indeed get the Cobra vs. Mr. Socko showdown, with the expected reaction of the crowd going bananas.

Epico is in at #10 and is quickly tossed, leaving us with Miz, Rhodes, Foley and Marella. Rhodes gets up to toss Marella so it’s Socko to Miz, only for Rhodes to toss Foley as well. Kofi Kingston is in at #11, giving us quite the talented three way. Kingston takes over and hits a double Boom Drop but the numbers catch up with him in a hurry. Jerry Lawler is in at #12 (Booker is shocked and Cole is stunned) and ducks Miz’s left hand, which hits Rhodes by mistake. Lawler gets in his usual offense and goes up, only for Rhodes to knock him out.

Ezekiel Jackson is in at #13 as Booker praises Lawler, who has returned to commentary. Jackson gets to clean house and it’s Jinder Mahal in at #14. The entrance takes forever as Mahal has to get out of his gear before going after Jackson. Great Khali is in at #15 and gets rid of Jackson and Mahal without much trouble. Hunico (with Camacho and the gold bicycle) is in at #16 and does about as much as you would expect.

Booker T. is in at #17 and Cole absolutely loses it (You know where this is going, though neither Cole nor Lawler noticed that Booker wasn’t wearing pants?) as the fans go nuts. Miz throws Kingston over the top but Kingston skins the cat to stay alive. Kingston gets shoved out anyway….but LANDS ON HIS HANDS AND WALKS BACKWARDS TO THE STEPS in one of the most ridiculously awesome saved you’ll ever see. Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero) is in at #18 as things start to slow down a bit.

Jim Duggan is in at #19 and the fans are rather happy to see him. As you might expect, Duggan certainly brings the energy as he throws those big right hands, only to get knocked out by Rhodes. Ziggler and Rhodes get rid of Booker and Khali at the same time and it’s Michael Cole in at #20 (you knew it was coming and the fan behind him freaking out makes it even better). His entrance takes forever and it’s the returning Kharma (Awesome Kong) in at #21 to immediately drop Cole (Booker and Lawler love it).

That’s enough to send Cole out to the apron, where Booker and Lawler pull him out for good. Kharma goes after Ziggler with a lifting Pedigree but has to stop for some yelling at Vickie. Hunico goes after Kharma but gets tossed, only for Ziggler to dump Kharma out. Sheamus is in at #22 as we have Sheamus, Miz, Rhodes, Kingston and Ziggler. Sheamus dumps Kingston and fires off the forearms to Miz and Rhodes.

Road Dogg is in at #23 and the fans go nuts all over again (even Cole is happy). Dogg gets in his usual dancing punches until things slow down and it’s Jey Uso in at #24. That means some dancing punches of his own until US Champion Jack Swagger is in at #25. The brawling continues on the ropes and it’s Wade Barrett in at #26. Barrett dumps Dogg to clear the ring a bit and it’s David Otunga in at #27 to clutter it right back up.

Randy Orton (hometown star) is in at #28 and goes right after Barrett, who put him on the shelf for a month. Uso is out and Rhodes and Ziggler get taken down with a double hanging DDT, followed by an RKO to Barrett for the elimination. Chris Jericho is in at #29 and tosses Otunga before things slow down a bit. Big Show is in at #30, giving us a final group of Miz, Rhodes, Ziggler, Sheamus, Swagger, Orton, Jericho and Show (not too shabby). Swagger is out before Show even gets in and gets WMD’d to make it even worse.

Show gets inside and tosses Miz, Rhodes and Ziggler in short order to get us down to four in a hurry. Jericho gets knocked down and it’s an RKO to Show, which doesn’t seem overly bright. Show gets up and Orton tosses him on his own, only to get dumped by Jericho to leave us with Jericho vs. Sheamus (quite the odd pairing). Jericho’s bulldog is countered but he’s right back with a dropkick.

Sheamus is sent out to the apron but hooks his leg around the ropes to survive. He’s able to get back inside, where Jericho catches him in a quick Walls. That’s broken up as well and Jericho gets sent to the apron, where he manages to get back inside as well. They both almost wind up crashing to the floor before getting inside just in time. A Codebreaker drops Sheamus, who is right back with a missed Brogue Kick. Jericho can’t hit the Codebreaker though and gets sent to the apron, where a Brogue Kick gives Sheamus the win at 55:25.

Rating: B. The ending alone here was rather good, with the drama of Jericho and Sheamus being worth a look. At the same time, this Rumble was heavy on the comedy, with the commentary entrances, plus Socko vs. the Cobra. It did have some good moments in between though and I had a good time watching this one back. I remembered liking it well enough back in the day and it was nice to see it live up to the hype.

Pyro and sign pointing take us out.

Overall Rating: B-. The Raw World Title and Rumble are the only things worth seeing here, unless you want to see Bryan in way over his head against some monsters. The problem here is the same as it always was around this time: with John Cena vs. the Rock looming at Wrestlemania, nothing else felt important. They do get some credit for trying something new with Sheamus though, as even though he was a former World Champion, winning the Rumble was a different level. Good enough show, but the Rumble carried the thing.

 

 

Head over to my website at kbwrestlingreviews.com with thousands of reviews from around the world and throughout wrestling history.

Smackdown
Date: September 26, 2008
Location: Nationwide Arena, Columbus, Ohio
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

We’re still dealing with undertaker trying to stalk Vickie Guerrero and La Familia, though he might need to have more than just his arm show up this week. The other big story is Jeff Hardy still chasing HHH and the World Title, with their showdown at No Mercy coming up in less than two weeks. Throw in the question of who gets wrapped in bubble wrap this week and we’ve got a heck of a show. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of Vladimir Kozlov deciding he wanted better competition and taking out Jeff Hardy and HHH last week.

Opening sequence.

Chavo Guerrero is in Vickie Guerrero’s office and is worried about the Undertaker choking him last week. Undertaker is coming for Vickie tonight so she sends him to get Big Show. Jeff Hardy pops in and says he wants Vladimir Kozlov but Vickie tells him to worry about No Mercy. Oh and their tag match tonight. Show comes in to put his arm around Vickie. This Undertaker hunts La Familia stuff is really not working.

HHH/Jeff Hardy vs. MVP/Brian Kendrick

HHH works on MVP’s arm to start and it’s off to Hardy for a top rope ax handle to the same arm. Kendrick comes in and gets headlocked but manages to take Hardy into the corner. That’s broken up rather quickly and MVP gets caught with the legdrop between the legs. HHH’s running clothesline sends MVP outside and Kendrick gets dropped onto him for the crash as we take a break.

We come back with HHH getting double teamed in the corner, followed by Kendrick hitting a dropkick for two. Kendrick misses a dive though and it’s Hardy coming in as JR calls this an “opening main event”. I’ll let you try to figure that out as Hardy misses a dive of his own for a rather delayed two, meaning MVP can come in. Some knees to the ribs slow Hardy down and Kendrick kicks him in the head for two.

MVP comes back in and slaps on a seated abdominal stretch, which is broken rather quickly. Kendrick hits a dropkick and the Whisper In The Wind, with the fans being VERY pleased. The big tag brings in HHH and everything breaks down. Hardy takes Kendrick out and MVP misses a big boot, leaving him to walk into the Pedigree for the pin.

Rating: B-. It definitely felt like a main event tag match and that’s a fine enough way to go. Hardy vs. HHH is already set for No Mercy and this was a way to move us towards the title match. The fans believe in Hardy and while it would have made more sense for him to get the pin, the result is what matters the most.

Video on the Great Khali, who is ready to face Vladimir Kozlov tonight.

Commentary thanks the fans for the CW for the last two years and the people who have worked with them over the years.

Classics On Demand: Sid/Ric Flair vs. Hogan/Piper at MSG. That sounds fun.

Here is Shelton Benjamin for a chat. He brags about being awesome in every way, which are as solid as the US Title on his shoulder. That’s why it bothers him to see R-Truth coming out here singing and dancing. What makes it even worse is the fans singing along with him…and here is R-Truth to interrupt. He asks Benjamin what’s up and Benjamin, with a bit of a quivering lip, walks out.

Brie Bella/Maria vs. Victoria/Natalya

Victoria shoves Maria down to start but she forearms her way out of trouble. Brie comes in and gets driven into the wrong corner, with Natalya wrestling her to the mat. A snap suplex gets two on Bella and Victoria comes back in for a full nelson. That’s broken up and Bella tries an anklescissors out of the corner but gets sent outside. Bella goes underneath the ring…and comes out from another side WAY too fast, apparently having grown to about eight feet tall and being incredibly flexible. Back in and Bella gets two off an X Factor before Maria’s high crossbody connects for the pin.

Rating: C. We’re getting pretty close to what is going on here and now it’s rather hard to hide the big twist. That’s what they’re showing here, which makes for an interesting future. It’s not like there is anything else going on here, but it’s nice to see some non-title feuds in the division for a change. The women can get a lot out of that kind of story, along with just offering some variety.

Video on Vladimir Kozlov.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. The Great Khali

Kozlov goes for the leg to start and gets forearmed in the back to cut that off. Instead Kozlov fires off the headbutts to the chest, only to get chopped in the head. A big boot sends Kozlov outside, where he avoids a headbutt into the post. Cue HHH to stare Kozlov down and Khali gets back inside, with HHH slugging at him. We’ll say the match was thrown out somewhere in there.

Post match the double beatdown is on until Jeff Hardy makes the save, with HHH grabbing a sledgehammer to chase the monsters away.

No Mercy rundown.

Chavo Guerrero warns Vickie Guerrero that Undertaker might get to her tonight but Big Show doesn’t want to hear this. We actually watch the video of Show beating Undertaker up, which played FOUR TIMES last week. Vickie sends Chavo to the ring for a match, which is quite the surprise.

Chavo Guerrero vs. Jimmy Wang Yang

During Guerrero’s entrance, Hurricane Helms pops up in an insert promo, telling him to run from the Undertaker. Yang dropkicks him to the floor to start but Guerrero is able to dropkick him out of the air. The armbar goes on before they go outside, where Guerrero stays on said arm. Back in and another armbar is broken up, with Yang scoring off a missile dropkick. The running spinwheel kick in the corner sets up a high crossbody for two but Yang misses the moonsault. Guerrero hits Three Amigos into a rolling Liger kick of all things for the pin.

Rating: C+. Yang is one of those valuable people who can go out there and make anyone look good. It’s kind of a shame that he’s stuck with a comedy gimmick and is little more than existing to help everyone else. You can do something else with him, maybe in a tag team, but that really doesn’t seem likely whatsoever.

Post match the lights go out and Guerrero panics.

Smackdown Tag Team Titles: Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder vs. Colons

The Colons are challenging. Primo and Hawkins start things off with Primo sending him into the ropes and grabbing a jumping anklescissors. Carlito comes in and hammers away but misses a charge into the post, allowing the champs to start in on the arm. A hammerlock and slam stay on the arm, with Carlito being knocked into the corner to cut off a comeback bid.

Ryder slaps on another armbar until Carlito fights up for a sunset flip, only for Ryder to bring Hawkins back in. Carlito is dumped out to the floor and we take a break. We come back with Carlito fighting out of a chinlock and sending the champions (with a loud CRACK) into each other. Primo comes back in to slug away but gets rolled up by Ryder for two. Carlito gets a blind tag though and hits a Backstabber for the fast pin and the titles.

Rating: C. The match wasn’t overly entertaining and I rewound the ending a few times as I kept thinking I was missing something. Carlito and Primo aren’t exactly a red hot team but it’s not like Hawkins and Ryder were doing anything impressive anyway. It’s a nice way to send things over to MyNetworkTV as a title change always feels at least somewhat important.

Minor note: when Carlito gets the pin, he celebrates a bit, which should be the case when you win something. Do that more often.

Post match Jesse and Festus come out with the moving van.

We cut to the back where Chavo Guerrero is panicking over the Undertaker. Vickie Guerrero and Big Show are going to the ring, with Guerrero agreeing to join them out of fear.

During the break, Jesse and Festus moved some stuff into their van, which had Ryan Braddock and Kenny Dykstra.

Here are Big Show and the Guerreros for a chat. After some EXCUSE ME’s, Vickie calls out Undertaker, who has physically and mentally obliterated Edge. We look back at Unforgiven (sweet goodness move on) and come back to the arena, where Show promises to destroy the Undertaker.

The lights go out and Chavo disappears…and then Undertaker is choking Guerrero backstage. Show gives chase and we see Undertaker destroying Chavo even more. The screen goes to static so Tazz tries to go interview Vickie, but the lights go out again. Tazz is instantly back on commentary and Undertaker is alone in the ring with Vickie. A Tombstone ends the show.

Overall Rating: C. The title change was a nice moment and Hardy vs. HHH is being set up well, but egads this Vickie/Undertaker stuff is not working. Unfortunately that’s one of the dominant stories on the show right now and it’s making for such a dull portion week after week. I liked parts of the show, but once HHH and Hardy were gone, the interest went sailing out the window.

 

 

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More Awesome Battle Royals
Commentators: Michael Cole, The Miz, Antonio Cesaro, Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Kaitlyn, Jerry Lawler, John Bradshaw Layfield, Gorilla Monsoon, Lord Alfred Hayes, Chris Cruise, Larry Zbyszko, Roddy Piper, Jim Ross, Les Thatcher

See there are battle royals, and then there are awesome battle royals, but these are the battle royals that were awesome, but not quite awesome enough to make the original batch. Yeah there isn’t much to say about a set like this, but that’s the case with most battle royals. I have no idea what they can do to fill in nearly two more hours of this stuff but let’s get to it.

From Main Event, December 26, 2012.

Battle Royal

Brodus Clay, Cody Rhodes, Damien Sandow, Darren Young, Drew McIntyre, Epico, Great Khali, Jey Uso, Jimmy Uso, Jinder Mahal, Justin Gabriel, Primo, Santino Marella, Ted DiBiase Jr., Titus O’Neil, Tyson Kidd, Wade Barrett, William Regal, Yoshi Tatsu, Zack Ryder

For a future US Title shot against Antonio Cesaro, on commentary. A bunch of people go after Khali to start so he tosses Tatsu without much trouble. Primo is tossed as commentary discusses battle royal strategy. The Prime Time Players go after Khali, which goes as well as you would expect. Cesaro and Miz argue about their accomplishments, with Miz listing off his rather impressive resume, which would only get bigger.

Things slow WAY down until McIntyre (a good 40lbs lighter than he would later become) is out, but he pulls Kidd out as well. Gabriel and Mahal are out too, triggering a brawl at ringside and a likely tag match. We take a break and come back with Jey Uso being tossed and Regal going out after him. Marella tries to hammer on Epico in the corner but gets sent to the apron. That just lets Marella skin the cat and pull Epico out, leaving Clay and Khali to slug it out. Khali kicks him in the head and tosses him out. Some big chops have O’Neil in trouble and Jimmy Uso is out as well.

More chops have more people in quite the agony as we take another break. We come back with the Prime Time Players circling Khali and they get him on the mat, which is a rather dumb idea in a battle royal, with Cesaro pointing out the idiocy. The Players finally annoy Khali too much so he dumps both of them, plus Rhodes (with a nasty chop) and Sandow.

We’re down to Marella, Ryder, Barrett and Khali, with Marella hitting the Cobra on Barrett. Ryder goes after Barrett but Marella tosses Ryder out. Barrett gets rid of Marella, leaving Barrett and Khali. A big boot puts Khali down and Barrett hammers away but Khali shrugs that and chops him out for the win at 18:16.

Rating: C+. Khali was oddly motivated here and put in more effort than I’ve seen from him…maybe ever really. I love seeing this kind of thing as it’s such a nothing, random battle royal that it made me wonder who was going to win. That’s a nice feeling to have and it didn’t feel anywhere near as long as it came off. Nice job.

From Saturday Night’s Main Event XXIX.

Battle Royal

Hulk Hogan, Jake Roberts, Tanaka, Shawn Michaels, Kato, Earthquake, Jimmy Snuka, Marty Jannetty, Warlord, Mr. Perfect, Haku, Greg Valentine, Tugboat, Jim Duggan, British Bulldog, Hercules, Paul Roma, Big Boss Man, Texas Tornado, Barbarian

It’s a brawl to start with Hogan choking Earthquake in the corner, with Roberts helping him out. Jannetty gets rid of Roman, who knocks Jannetty out as well. We settle down to a bunch of slow fighting, with Perfect being brave enough to go to the middle rope for a right hand to Boss Man. Hogan and Valentine take turns elbowing Perfect in the head as Bulldog is tossed out.

Kato is sent out and Roberts follows him, only to get the snake out and basically bring the match to a screeching halt. We take a break and come back with Tugboat and Hogan slugging out it, which is broken up by Warlord, earning him some praise from fans everywhere. Hogan dumps Warlord and Tornado is tossed as well. Earthquake gets rid of Duggan but gets tossed by Hogan. Kato is eliminated but Tugboat gets rid of Hogan in a surprise.

Hercules and Tugboat are tossed as well and it’s suddenly a midcard match. Boss Man slugs away at Perfect, who dropkicks him into a backdrop from Barbarian for the elimination. Michaels dropkicks Haku out and we’re down to Michaels, Perfect, Valentine and Barbarian. A dropkick staggers Perfect but Michaels is sent out, leaving us with three. Valentine manages to get rid of Barbarian and gives Perfect a heck of a chop. Some elbows let Valentine send Perfect to the apron but Perfect sends him out for the win at 12:31.

Rating: C. As was the case with the other Saturday Night’s Main Event battle royal, the match just DIES when Hogan is eliminated. It doesn’t help that Hogan was eliminated by Tugboat of all people, as that made for a rather pathetic moment. Perfect winning is fine, but this was disappointing to say the least.

From Monday Night Raw, April 22, 2013.

Divas Battle Royal

AJ Lee, Aksana, Naomi, Tamina Snuka, Layla

Yeah five women for a future Divas Title shot. AJ jumps into Tamina’s arms to start and gets kicked in the face for her efforts. Layla (who should be the crowd favorite as we’re in England but receives no reaction because…well look at the match) kicks Aksana out and Naomi/Layla hip attack Tamina. Naomi is out as Kaitlyn jokes about Layla’s gear being flag themed, with Cole trying to avoid various commentary. Layla kicks Tamina out and AJ is still out cold off the superkick. She picks the dead weight AJ up…and AJ tosses her out to win at 3:19.

Rating: D. If you only have five women for a battle royal, just don’t have the battle royal. This was in that weird period for the women where they had some people who were trying but it was still not exactly being taken seriously. Hence a five woman battle royal which lasted about three minutes and featured one of them being laid out for a good while.

From WCW Saturday Night, November 8, 1997.

Lucha Libre Battle Royal

Lizmark Jr., Super Calo, Villano IV, Villano V, Silver King, Hector Garza, El Dandy, Ciclope, La Parka, Halloween, Psychosis, Damien, Juventud Guerrera

Ok then. It’s a brawl to start and Dusty Rhodes is having WAY too much fun with this. Halloween is out and Damien misses a running dropkick in the corner. Lizmark moonsaults onto Damien and Rhodes is THRILLED with El Dandy being involved. The Villanos take over and Psychosis tosses Ciclope for a NASTY crash on the floor. Damien is out and Guerrera punches his way out of a powerbomb from Lizmark. Dandy tosses Lizmark (more like Lizmark tosses himself), sending Dusty into “ALL RIGHT! ALL RIGHT! EL DANDY IS STILL IN THERE!”.

The Villanos are both out at the same time (Rhodes: “They’re kin. They might as well go out together.”) and King is dropkicked out as well. Garza is backdropped out and Dandy gets rid of Calo, only to be kicked out by Parka (Rhodes: “Bless his heart. He did good!”). Guerrera monkey flips Parka and hits a heck of a springboard spinwheel kick. Psychosis gets Guerrera in an electric chair but Parka chairs Guerrera in the back and they’re both out, giving Parka the win at 7:00.

Rating: C+. Dusty Rhodes was the absolute star of this thing as he was having an absolute ball with the match. There are very few things as fun as listening to an energized Dusty Rhodes doing commentary when he gets to have fun and that was on full display here. The match was nothing, but dang the commentary was a blast.

From sometime in the mid to late 80s (possible December 1, 1986 in Fayetteville, North Carolina).

Bunkhouse Stampede

Ricky Morton, Bobby Eaton, Bill Dundee, Jimmy Garvin, Robert Gibson, Jimmy Valiant, Manny Fernandez, Italian Stallion, Krusher Khrushchev, Dennis Condrey, Arn Anderson, Rick Rude, Paul Ellering, Animal, Ivan Koloff, Tim Horner, Bobby Jaggers, Don Kernoodle, Barry Windham

I’m not even going to try to list everyone here as the audio isn’t great and the camera angles miss a bunch of the entrances anyway. It looks like we have about twenty in there but there is no commentary so it’s even more confusing. Some trashcan lids are brought in to make things even more violent though there are only so many elimination attempts. Fernandez and….someone go outside and seem to be out as Animal trashcan lids Koloff.

Horner (I think) is out as the ring is still way too full for much of note to go on. Jaggers is out and so is Khrushchev, who pulls someone with him. There goes Kernoodle as Anderson chokes Morton and Ron Garvin is out. Morton is tossed as the ring is finally clearing out a bit. Morton helps Gibson get rid of Rude, only for Gibson to be eliminated as well. Valiant is out and there goes Jimmy Garvin, followed by Ellering. We’re down to Anderson, Eaton, Animal, Condrey and…I think it’s Barry Windham.

Either way, Animal gets rid of Anderson and Condrey is tossed, followed by who I believe was Windham. That leaves Animal to hit Eaton with some kind of a whip plus a dropkick. Condrey gets in a cheap shot from the floor but Animal fights back and gets rid of Eaton for the win at 12:48.

Rating: C+. You can only get so much out of something like this as it’s just a wild brawl, but that’s the entire point. The idea was something like “come as you are” so a lot of them were in street clothes to make it feel more authentic. Then again there were also a bunch of trashcan lids involved so it could only be so serious. Good, fun brawl here though and a nice hidden surprise.

From Prime Time Wrestling, July 6, 1992.

Battle Royal

Beau Beverly, Blake Beverly, Virgil, Skinner, Koko B. Ware, Kato, Owen Hart, Brian Knobbs, Duane Gill, Jerry Sags, Tito Santana, Texas Tornado, Joe Mato, Tatanka, Jim Brunzell, Bret Hart, Barry Horowitz, Ron Starr, Sgt. Slaughter, Rick Martel, Ted DiBiase, IRS, Bret Johnson, Berzerker, JA Gooden, C. Martinez, Bob Bradley, Bob Knight, Bruce Mitchell, Gary Davis, Joe Holland, Jim Powers, Al Hunter, Scott Palantonio, Barry Hardy, Nick Ganger, British Bulldog

I got at least seven or eight of those jobbers’ names wrong, though they did at least get individual entrances. Berzerker is on the floor and pulls one of the jobbers out and beats him up, leaving Hayes to mock the guy for getting this kind of a match. Various jobbers are tossed out as commentary has no idea who these people are thus far. Berzerker finally gets inside as Powers is tossed out.

We take a break and come back with Martel and Gill being tossed out. Skinner dumps Tatanka and Santana does the same to DiBiase, followed by IRS going out. Owen and Virgil are gone too and the Beverlys and Bret are out as well. There goes Kato as the ring is suddenly FAR less full.

Sags is tossed and we’re down to Skinner, Bulldog, Berzerker, Santana, Ware and Tornado. Ware and Santana are tossed out rather quickly and Skinner actually gets Bulldog out. We’re down to Berzerker, Tornado and Skinner, which is one of the weirdest final groupings I’ve ever seen. Tornado slugs away at both of them but Berzerker comes back for the double elimination and the win at 9:58.

Rating: D+. Yeah not much to this one, with a good chunk of the entrants being jobbers who commentary couldn’t even identify. The idea here was to just have a spectacle of a match and that went well enough. They didn’t do anything special but again, the whole appeal was in having that many people involved at once, which went fine.

From New York City, New York, July 12, 1986.

Battle Royal

Junkyard Dog, Greg Valentine, King Tonga, Jimmy Hart, Billy Jack Haynes, Harley Race, Lanny Poffo, Iron Mike Sharpe, Pedro Morales, Brutus Beefcake, Tony Atlas, Moondog Spot, British Bulldog, Dynamite Kid, SD Jones, Johnny Valiant, Sivi Afi, Moondog Rex, Tony Garea, Big John Studd, Bobby Heenan, King Kong Bundy

A bunch of people go after Studd to get rid of him as Hart hides underneath the ring. Bundy is out as well, followed by Heenan (oh man seeing Heenan and Hart trying to have a match could have been great), who stops to yell on commentary for a bit. There goes Jones, followed by Sharpe and valiant.

Garea is tossed and Race is gone as well to get rid of the rest of the Heenan Family. There goes Afi and the Bulldogs dropkick the Moondogs out, leaving Dog and Haynes to lock up. Beefcake dumps Kid as Hart is still hiding underneath the ring. Morales is out and then Beefcake goes as well, leaving Valentine against five good guys.

Valentine manages to toss Hayes and Tonga, leaving Valentine, Dog, Bulldog, Poffo and Hart underneath the ring. Poffo and Bulldog are both tossed with Dog being sent through the ropes, where he finds Hart hiding. Dog throws Hart back inside and gets in a fight with Valentine. The two of them go over….and Hart wins at 12:57.

Rating: C. Call this one goofy fun, as it was a bunch of people doing their thing until Hart could come in and steal the win like a cowardly heel should. Hart would be able to brag about this for the better part of ever and that’s exactly how it should have been done. I had a good time with this, even if it was just a countdown to the obvious ending.

From WCW Pro, November 18, 1995.

Battle Royal

Dave Sullivan, Nasty Ned, Disco Inferno, Cobra, Mark Starr, Frankie Lancaster, Barrio Brother Ricky, Barrio Brother Fidel, Buddy Lee Parker, James Earl

Why? It’s a standard brawl to start and yes Disco wants to check his hair. They fight around the ropes until Lancaster is gone, followed by Cobra and Starr. A quick series of eliminations leaves us with Parker and Earl (regular partners) to beat on Disco, who fights up and tosses both of them for the win at 5:03. Disco is more annoyed at his hair getting messed up.

Rating: D+. The thing that interests me the most here is how many shows WCW had and kept running for YEARS. Pro went on until 1998 and was basically forgotten unless you happened to catch it at random. Case in point, any match where Disco Inferno is the biggest of the ten stars is not exactly a high level match, but it was a feature here.

From Superstars, February 16, 1991.

Tag Team Battle Royal

Nasty Boys, Power & Glory, Rockers, Legion Of Doom, Demolition, Bushwhackers, Orient Express

For the Wrestlemania Tag Team Title shot and only one member of a team has to be eliminated. They start the usual exchange of punching, with McMahon saying it’s too much action to call. Demolition loads up the Rockers in a double gorilla press but Marty pulls Shawn down in a smart move. A double superkick eliminates Smash and Demolition is out, followed by the Bushwhackers being thrown out.

Marty accidentally knocks Shawn out and we’re down to Power & Glory, the LOD, the Express and the Nasty Boys. Hawk dumps Kato to get rid of the Express and Animal gorilla presses Tanaka out for a bonus. Roma is sent through the ropes so Animal throws him back in (Piper: “No Animal! The other way!”). Hercules throws Roma at Animal, who pulls him out of the air and easily tosses him. We’re down to the Nastys and the LOD…but Roma crotches Hawk on top and dumps him out 6:19.

Rating: C. I’ve seen this one a few times before and it’s one of those ideas that works rather well. I’ll take it over some of the other ways to set up a title match and it was cool to see a bunch of teams getting to mix it up. The LOD were clearly the smashing machines here and it shouldn’t be a surprise that they would be champions in about six months.

From Smoky Mountain Wrestling TV, January 28, 1995.

Battle Royal

This seems to be more of a Royal Rumble with Robert Gibson in at #1 and New Jack in at #2. Jack kicks him in the face to start so Gibson grabs a small package, with commentary pointing out the instincts taking over. Chris Candido is in at #3 and teams up with Jack on Gibson with a string of elbows. Gibson manages to survive in the corner and it’s George South coming in at #4. The slow brawling ensues and it’s Boo Bradley (Balls Mahoney) in at #5 to go straight after Candido and toss him out. Buddy Landel is in at #6 and they start pairing off and Tommy Pitner is in at #7.

We take a break and the Dirty White Boy is in at #8 to chase Landel out and then go after him as well. So that’s two out, with Bryant Anderson in at #9. Anderson grabs an armbar on Bradley until Mustafa Saed (Jack’s partner) is in at #10. Saed and Jack collide for a double elimination as Bradley chills in the corner for a bit. The Wolfman is in at #11 and goes after Bradley, which doesn’t go well. D’Lo Brown is in at #12 and helps toss Gibson.

Scotty McKeever is in at #13 and Anderson is gone. Bradley and Brown are both out and it’s Unabomb (later known as Kane) is in at #14 for a bunch of powerbombs. Unabomb clears the ring and is left alone until Ricky Morton is in at #15. Morton strikes away as well as he can until Eddie Gilbert is in at #16. Gilbert wastes no time in throwing powder in Morton’s eyes for the elimination and apparently Gilbert and Unabomb both win (good for $5000) at 14:35.

Rating: C+. This was the Unabomb show and they clearly knew they had something special with him. He was huge, he could move, and he had a great look. Don’t bother trying to make it any more complicated than that and it should work. The rest of the match had some fun moments, but Unabomb stood out WAY above everyone else. And not just because he’s tall.

Overall Rating: C. Battle royals are hard to do in the first place, but I liked what they did here as it was a nice mixture of stuff. Rather than just having one battle royal after another, this featured different kinds of matches rather than the same wrestlers doing the same battle royals. It’s a set that was well set up and I’ll absolutely take that.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: September 12, 2008
Location: Bradley Center, Milwaukee, Wisconsin
Commentators: Tazz, Jim Ross

We’re done with Unforgiven and HHH is still the World Champion, being the only champion to survive the Championship Scramble. It’s clear that Jeff Hardy is coming for the title though and that should make for a big story to close out the year. The other big story saw Big Show attacking Undertaker on Vickie Guerrero’s behalf, which can’t go well. Let’s get to it.

Here is Unforgiven if you need a recap.

We open with a recap of the Championship Scramble.

Opening sequence.

Here is HHH to get things going. HHH says we need to see Unforgiven, even if it’s buying the DVD (and not just because he gets good residuals). He recaps the big events on the show, including Rey Mysterio’s crazy mohawk. Only one man walked in as champion and walked out as champion (aside from Cody Rhodes and Ted DiBiase I guess) and that was him. It was a difficult match but he found a way with one second left.

Cue Jeff Hardy to interrupt and say that HHH is awesome. The locker room, including Hardy, respects him because he’s a legend. HHH says he respects Hardy for being an individual who is always reaching for the brass ring, but he is just one step away. Hardy says maybe that’s true, or maybe he never had the right people, like the Kliq or DX or the family.

HHH doesn’t like that and brings up Jeff’s brother Matt. Yeah Jeff might be great, but Matt is the one who is a champion. Since they’ve been apart, Jeff hasn’t been able to keep his other activities from letting him get what he wants the most out of life. Tonight, Jeff is in a #1 contenders match for a shot at No Mercy and HHH hopes he wins so Jeff can prove him right.

Maryse/Natalya/Victoria vs. Maria/Michelle McCool/Brie Bella

McCool headlocks Natalya to start with McCool taking her into the corner so Maria can come in for la majistral. Bella starts in on the arm but Natalya drops her with a kind of step up backdrop. Maryse pounds on Bella on the mat and sends her outside, where Brie goes under the ring as usual. Back in and Brie gets a quick rollup for the pin on Victoria.

Rating: C-. The under the ring deal is fine, but it only has so much impact when Bella had only been in the ring for about a minute. Other than that, it’s easy to see why McCool was presented as a star, as she definitely has the athleticism and the look. The problem is they’re still in that weird period where the wrestling is being presented as serious (as it was here) but the Titantron videos are still showing off their appearances. It kind of has to be one or the other and that’s missing thus far.

R-Truth vs. Chavo Guerrero

Bam Neely is here with Guerrero. Truth takes him down with a hammerlock to start but gets kicked in the face for his efforts. Guerrero’s crossface chickenwing is broken up though and Truth hits a powerslam into a pump kick. Three Amigos connect and Guerrero loads up the frog splash. Truth cuts him off…and Neely shoves Truth down for the DQ.

Rating: C. They didn’t have time to do much here, though Neely getting involved was hardly a good way to go. As usual, Neely is about as uninteresting of a bodyguard as you can have as he’s someone who is just there and that doesn’t offer much in the way of value. Hopefully this isn’t part of a long feud for Truth either, as Guerrero isn’t the most thrilling opponent.

Post match Guerrero yells at Neely for the loss and gets shoved down. Truth drops both of them.

Shelton Benjamin hits on Eve Torres in the back when HHH interrupts. Torres leaves and, after opining about Torres being attractive, he says he doesn’t think Benjamin needs to be in the four way for the #1 contendership. Otherwise, Jeff Hardy is already coming for the title, but Benjamin says he’s reaching for a gold title, not a brass ring.

Festus vs. Kenny Dykstra

Jesse is here with Festus and they’re dressed as movers because Smackdown is moving to MyNetworkTV. Before the match, Dykstra brags about his potential and promises to take the garbage men out to the dumpster. He decks Festus before the bell and knocks Jesse down as well, only for Jesse to get in a show of his own.

Then Jesse rings the bell and Festus’ mauling begins. A fireman’s carry flapjack hits Dykstra…and Jesse and Festus hog tie him with duct tape. They put him on the moving cart and wrap him in plastic wrap to wheel him off. And that’s that, as the opening bell wasn’t official, so this was either not a match or a no contest due to kidnapping.

We recap Big Show getting yelled at by Vickie Guerrero at Unforgiven and then attacking Undertaker, seemingly on her behalf.

Here is Vickie Guerrero for an explanation. She talks about how Undertaker threatened to destroy her, but here she is. A lot of that is due to the Big Show, who comes out to shake her hand. Show talks about how Undertaker doesn’t follow the rules and how he needs to learn who is in charge. That’s when Show began to realize the benefits of a power alliance between himself and Vickie. She wants to be in charge and he wants to be WWE Champion and they’ll be working towards those goals. There isn’t much of a way around the fact that it’s still going to be Undertaker vs. Show again.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Scotty Goldman/Funaki

Total dominance, with a pair of headbutts finishing Funaki in less than a minute.

Post match Kozlov says give him competition or he’ll find it himself.

Ezekiel Jackson is reading WWE Magazine when HHH comes in. They have a staredown until The Brian Kendrick comes in to ask if anything is wrong. HHH talks about the four way and says that he was wanting Kendrick to win. Of all the losers in the Championship Scramble, Kendrick was the biggest.

Colons vs. Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins

Non-title and this is the Colons debut as a team. Carlito unloads on Hawkins in the corner before Primo tags himself in for a springboard dropkick. A powerbomb drops Carlito onto Ryder for two but Hawkins offers a distraction, meaning the Rough Ryder can connect. The chinlock, with a knee in Carlito’s back, goes on, with Ryder going major evil by using the hair to pull him back down.

Another chinlock doesn’t last as long but Hawkins is right there with a clothesline. The Hennig necksnap sets up a third chinlock but Carlito fights up. This time it’s actually enough for the tag off to Primo to clean house. Everything breaks down and a quick Backstabber gives Carlito the upset pin.

Rating: C+. As usual, I’m not wild on seeing champions lose clean, though it’s a fast way to boost up a new team. At the same time, it’s not like there are a bunch of teams going for the titles at the moment so throw them out there as fast as they can. It the match worked well enough, which shouldn’t be a surprise as the Colons have been teaming together for years.

HHH runs into MVP in the back and isn’t sure why he’s in the four way. The other three make sense but….MVP?

Classics On Demand: Flair vs. Race at Starrcade 1983.

MVP vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Jeff Hardy vs. The Brian Kendrick

Non-title and the winner gets a shot at HHH at No Mercy. Kendrick rolls outside to start, leaving Benjamin and Hardy to exchange rollups for two each. MVP breaks that up and stomps away at Hardy in the corner until Kendrick runs in to try and steal a pin. That earns him a trip back to the floor, leaving MVP to facebuster Benjamin. A quick Whisper In The Wind gives Hardy two and we take a break.

We come back with MVP chinlocking Benjamin until Kendrick makes the save. Kendrick camel clutches Benjamin as Ezekiel Jackson sends Hardy into the barricade. That’s broken up as well so MVP is back in for a basement dropkick to Benjamin. Hardy is sent back outside, leaving Benjamin to German suplex MVP for two. Benjamin clears Hardy and Kendrick out again, leaving them to fight on the floor while he gets a triangle choke on MVP.

That’s broken up as Hardy gets back in and drops Benjamin for two but the Swanton misses. Kendrick and MVP double team Hardy, which works as well as you would expect as MVP drops Kendrick with a clothesline. Back up and Hardy hits the Whisper In The Wind for two on MVP but Benjamin makes the save. Paydirt drops MVP again but Kendrick hits the Kendrick. Hardy Swantons in to break it up though and pins Kendrick for the win.

Rating: B. The result was the only one that made sense as Hardy has been treated as the next big thing, and certainly the next big challenger, so he should be getting the shot at HHH. The match was the usual fast paced fight with a lot of near falls and saved. It got a good deal of time though, which has me wondering how Hardy would get there, which worked for a main event.

Post match Hardy celebrates but Vladimir Kozlov comes in to lay him out to end the show.

Overall Rating: C. The main event was the big focus of the show and they did the right thing, with Hardy being the only one of the four who made sense. Unfortunately the other big story was the Show/Vickie deal, which is making me dread the next few weeks. Hardy going after the title is absolutely the biggest story taking place and the fans are more than into it, but the show needs something else beyond just that.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: August 29, 2008
Location: Mellon Arena, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Attendance: 6,500
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

We’re just over a week away from Unforgiven and as you might have guessed, the big story here is the Championship Scramble. That’s the kind of match that can open up a lot of possibilities and hopefully some of those are teased this week. We could also use some other things to help fill out the card so let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

Here is Undertaker to get things going, with La Familia watching in the back. Undertaker says Vickie Guerrero wants to be forgiven of her sins but he isn’t the forgiving kind. He will not forget what she did to him and is coming for her soul. Once he has taken it, she will burn.

In the back, La Familia leaves Vickie alone and she’s locked in her dressing room.

R-Truth talks about growing up the hard way and how you can never change your past. The truth is about building a better future every day and now he’s here full time and that’s the truth.

R-Truth vs. Kenny Dykstra

We get a promo from Dykstra, saying he should be getting the attention rather than a convict. Truth hits him in the face and gets two off a rollup but Dykstra drops him with a shot to the face. Back up and Dykstra blocks a suplex, setting up the double arm crank with a knee between the shoulders. That’s broken up and R-Truth hits the spinning forearm into the ax kick for the pin. Truth looked pretty good here, even in a short match.

Michelle McCool is doing a photo shoot when Maryse comes in to suggest she’ll be taking the Divas Title. McCool isn’t impressed and says Maryse will never have the title due to a lack of talent. Which one is the villain again?

Maria/Michelle McCool vs. Natalya/Maryse

Natalya grabs a headlock on McCool to start but gets Russian legsweeped down for two. Maria comes in and gets planted with a slam but avoids a legdrop. Natalya is right back up to bring Maryse in, with a DDT taking Maria out for the rather out of nowhere pin.

Post match the brawl is on between McCool and Maryse, with the two of them brawling to the floor, where Natalya helps Maryse take her out.

We recap Jeff Hardy vs. MVP. The two have been feuding for a few weeks now as Hardy wants to be WWE Champion while MVP doesn’t think much of Hardy’s lifestyle. This included bringing up Hardy’s house burning down, which was too far for Hardy. MVP then beat him at Summerslam, and now it’s time for a rematch.

Hardy calls MVP an obstacle on the way to being WWE Champion.

Vickie Guerrero is still stuck in her dressing room but finally realizes she has a phone….which doesn’t work and is thrown against the wall.

Jeff Hardy vs. MVP

They take their time to start until Hardy pulls him down with a headlock. MVP knocks him to the apron but Hardy is back with a right hand that has a frustrated MVP walking around ringside. Back in and another headlock has MVP frustrated a bit more as Ross suggests Hardy’s offense is surprising him here (because Ross knows how to tell a story on commentary).

Some armdrags into an armbar keeps MVP in trouble but he fights up and stops a charge with an elbow to the face. MVP tries to go after the leg but gets kicked into the post, with Hardy wrapping the arm around it a few times for a bonus. Hardy sends him outside for a running flip dive off the apron and we take a break.

Back with MVP sending him into the corner to get out of another armbar and getting a needed breather. Hardy gets sent into the barricade and we hit the seated abdominal stretch. That’s broken up fairly quickly and Hardy hits the slingshot dropkick in the corner. The Swanton hits raised knees though and a missed dropkick lets MVP bend Hardy’s back around the post.

MVP kicks him down and grabs the camel clutch, sending Hardy over to the ropes. The double arm crank goes on again so Hardy fights back up, earning himself something like a belly to belly. Hardy tries to run the corner but gets knocked down for a nasty crash and two. MVP’s belly to back superplex is countered into a crossbody for two, followed by the Whisper In The Wind. The Swanton finishes MVP off.

Rating: B. This turned into a fight as both guys were trying so hard to put the other away. Hardy getting the win is the right way to go to even the score and there is a good chance that they’ll run it back one more time. MVP is someone who can make anyone look better and Hardy is getting closer and closer to the top of the card in a hurry.

Post match Shelton Benjamin runs in to lay out Hardy…and them MVP as well.

Josh Matthews and Candice Michelle are still at the Democratic National Convention. Eh important enough.

Jesse & Festus vs. Curt Hawkins/Zack Ryder

Non-title. Festus clears the ring without much trouble to start…and here is the Big Show to jump Hawkins for the DQ in about a minute.

Post match Show wrecks everyone but the off mode Festus, Show says “hi” and promises to never be overlooked again. Last week he didn’t get a qualifying match for the Championship Scramble so he made a little oversight of his own like this one.

Vickie Guerrero is still trapped in her office.

Brie Bella vs. Victoria

This is Brie’s debut. Victoria takes her down with a headlock and isn’t having anything of a leg sweep. A rollup out of the corner gives Brie two and she grabs some flying mares. Back up and Victoria powers her into the corner, setting up a standing moonsault. Brie bails to the floor and climbs underneath the ring, where Victoria pulls her back out. They get inside again and the rather energized Brie gets a small package for the upset pin. Well that was a surprise.

Raw Rebound.

Brian Kendrick, reading a book, talks about how ridiculous it is to see two members of the Championship Scramble facing each other to prepare. Kendrick doesn’t see the point, which is why he is reading the Art Of War. Ezekiel Jackson on the other hand is enjoying something from Dr. Seuss, showing that he is the real genius.

Unforgiven rundown.

Shelton Benjamin talks about the importance of gold and he is the Gold Standard. Gah that really doesn’t work, especially with the golden hair.

HHH vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Benjamin wastes no time in snapping off some armdrags into an armbar and HHH is in early trouble. HHH fights up and takes over on the arm as well, allowing him to drive in some knees. Benjamin tries to get up and gets taken down by the arm again as HHH gets to stay on the arm. The threat of a Pedigree sends Benjamin bailing out to the floor and we take a break.

Back with HHH in trouble and Benjamin dropping him with a neckbreaker. A neck crank has HHH down again and Benjamin switches into a triangle choke. That’s reversed as well but Benjamin reverses a suplex into a neckbreaker, meaning it’s back to the neck crank as Benjamin certainly has a target.

HHH gets up again and avoids a Stinger Splash, setting up a hard clothesline. Benjamin goes up and dives into a powerslam, with HHH grabbing a DDT for two. Back up and Benjamin kicks him in the head for two but walks into a spinebuster. The facebuster connects but here is the Great Khali….who stands there as HHH hits the Pedigree for the win.

Rating: B-. This was a nice technical match with the ending making more sense than I would have expected. Khali showing up normally would make someone freeze but HHH finished the match off as fast as he could. That’s a good way to go and keeps HHH looking strong going into the title match. I could have gone without the US Champion taking a pin, but at least it was to someone higher up in the food chain.

Post match Benjamin hits HHH with the US Title and Khali gives HHH the chokebomb.

The lights go out in Vickie Guerrero’s locker room. She screams and the show ends. Yes, that’s all we got after this show long story.

Overall Rating: B-. This show was in a tough spot as the big title match is already set for the pay per view and there isn’t much that needs to be done. Thankfully the good action was there to help boost it up, but the only big thing all night was the Vickie Guerrero deal, which went absolutely nowhere. I liked the wrestling a good deal, but this was a show that was there because they needed to fill in a spot on the way to Unforgiven.

 

 

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Wrestlemania Dark Matches
Commentators: Jim Ross, Jerry Lawler, Michael Cole, John Bradshaw Layfield, Tazz, Todd Grisham, Matt Striker, Joey Styles, Josh Matthews

So this is pretty much as simple as you can get, with the WWE Vault releasing a collection of matches from before the full Wrestlemania cards begin. These matches are tasked with getting the show going and that can make for some interesting options. Some of these are going to be a lot better than others but they can be a lot of fun. Let’s get to it.

From Wrestlemania XVIII.

Mr. Perfect/Lance Storm/Test vs. Rikishi/Albert/Scotty 2 Hotty

Albert and Storm start things off and Jacqueline is the referee. A sitout press slam gives Albert two and it’s off to Scotty, who gets taken down with a leg lariat. Test comes in for a hard corner clothesline but Storm misses a middle rope elbow. Rikishi comes in for a Samoan drop on Perfect (who bounces off like a backdrop for a weird look) and Scotty Worms Storm to send him outside. The Albert Bomb (chokebomb) hits Test and it’s a Stinkface to Perfect, who is smart enough to pull up his towel just in time. Said towel gets stuck on Rikishi, who hits the Banzai Drop for the pin at 3:07.

Rating: C. Fast paced match but they didn’t have time to do much. You’re only going to get so much out of six people in just over three minutes but they managed to make it work well enough. If nothing else, points for not having one of the Canadians take the fall, which would have been such a WWF thing to do in Toronto.

Post match the winners and Jacqueline dance.

From Wrestlemania XXIII.

Ric Flair/Carlito vs. Gregory Helms/Chavo Guerrero

This is a lumberjack match and Guerrero is the “Cruiserweight of the World” because Lilian Garcia makes a lot of mistakes. To make things even weirder, there is a big curtain over the entrance as the set hasn’t been revealed yet. Helms backs Flair into the corner to start but gets hiptossed for his efforts. Carlito comes in and gets poked in the eye, allowing Chavo to come in and get dropped in a hurry. A dropkick sends Chavo outside so Snitsky throws him back inside without much trouble. Back in and Helms takes over with a chinlock on Carlito and it’s back to Chavo as Cole puts over the awesomeness of Detroit.

The slow beating continues as there is very little heat to the whole thing as it’s already running long. Carlito gets in a shot of his own and brings in Flair to chop away. Helms breaks up the Figure Four so Carlito comes in as everything breaks down. Chavo misses the frog splash though and it’s back to Carlito to clean house. Helms gets backdropped onto the lumberjacks and Carlito hits a quick Backstabber to pin Chavo (because OF COURSE the champion had to take the fall) at 6:38.

Rating: C-. The point here was to get Flair in the ring and to have a bunch of people get on the DVD as a lumerback. That doesn’t make for the most thrilling match though as they went a lot longer than they should have. It wasn’t an interesting match in the first place and then it went long, which is never a good combination.

From Wrestlemania XXII.

Battle Royal

Eugene, Viscera, Snitsky, Goldust, Lance Cade, Rob Conway, Tyson Tomko, Trevor Murdoch, Matt Striker, Super Crazy, Funaki, Steven Richards, Simon Dean, Joey Mercury, Johnny Nitro, Psicosis, Animal, William Regal

Officially this is Raw vs. Smackdown, but it’s also every man for themselves so the logic is kind of contradictory. Cole: “I guess we have to be impartial here.” Tazz: “Why?” Simon Dean tries to tell us to get in shape and is promptly eliminated first. Brawling on the ropes ensues and Conway is out, followed by Funaki. Cade (Cole: “Who’s that?”) is out and Richards takes too much time posing, meaning he’s eliminated as well.

There goes Striker (thankfully) and Regal gets hit with Shattered Dreams. Murdoch dumps Eugene as the ring is thankfully clearing out a bit. Psicosis gets rid of Goldust in an upset and Eugene stops for a reunion with Regal. Snitsky isn’t having the risk of that being his fault so he tosses Regal without much effort. MNM hits a Snapshot on Eugene to get rid of him as well and we settle down to the final four from each show getting into a staredown. Psicosis gets rid of Murdoch and then gets knocked out by Tomko to get us down to six.

Tomko and Snitsky beat up Animal and Viscera crushes MNM in various corners. MNM fight back (the Melina screams might be powering them on) and avoid a Viscera charge, only to make the mistake of trying a Snapshot. The double Visagra (if you don’t know, don’t ask) has Melina cringing before MNM is out. Snitsky accidentally knocks Tomko out and it’s Animal left with Viscera and Snitsky, as I’ll let you guess who the Chicago fans are behind. For some reason Animal is eliminated and Snitsky misses a charge so Viscera wins at 9:03 without touching him.

Rating: D+. Why would you put Animal this close to getting the win in a meaningless battle royal on the pre-show and then have him lose for the sake of Snitsky and Viscera? This was the second time I’ve seen this match in about a month and it still doesn’t make a ton of sense. Maybe Viscera couldn’t take a bump over the top, but egads this seemed like it could have been a fun moment and it wound up just being forgettable.

From Wrestlemania XXV.

Tag Team Titles: John Morrison/The Miz vs. Colons

This is a lumberjack match to unify both sets of Tag Team Titles, with commentary saying this kind of match has NEVER happened before, about ten minutes after we saw it in the same collection. Primo and Morrison start things off with Primo getting in a headstand in the corner, setting up a hurricanrana to send Morrison outside. The beating lets Primo get two and it’s Carlito coming in for a double slingshot drop. Carlito misses a shot of his own though and it’s off to Miz for his Wrestlemania in-ring debut.

This goes as badly as you would expect, with Carlito knocking him down and hitting a double springboard flip dive. Morrison grabs Carlito by the hair though and throws him outside, nearly triggering a brawl with the lumberjacks. Back in and Carlito gets caught in a double hot shot for two and Miz grabs a chinlock. Carlito fights up for a double knockdown and does it again with Morrison, which is enough to bring Primo back in to clean house.

Some flips set up a dropkick (as Miz might not have been in position in time) but Morrison is right back in with the Flying Chuck for two. Everything breaks down and Carlito spears Miz through the ropes, leaving Morrison to roll through Primo’s high crossbody for two more. Morrison tries a reverse suplex but Primo flips over into a Backstabber in a sweet counter for the pin and the titles at 8:22.

Rating: B-. This was a more traditional match as the lumberjacks were barely a factor. The Colons winning was a nice way to go as it’s a bit of a surprise and a fun surprise to start the night. If nothing else, the finish was more than good enough to make for a big ending. Good stuff here, and one of the better pre-show matches to date.

From Wrestlemania XXIV.

Battle Royal

Elijah Burke, The Miz, Chuck Palumbo, Snitsky, Deuce, Tommy Dreamer, Shannon Moore, Jamie Noble, Kofi Kingston, Festus, Cody Rhodes, Lance Cade, Hardcore Holly, Jesse, Stevie Richards, Trevor Murdoch, The Brian Kendrick, The Great Khali, Jimmy Wang Yang, Domino, Mark Henry, Val Venis, Kane, Jim Duggan

For an ECW Title shot on the main card. It’s a brawl to start and Deuce and Domino are both out in a hurry. Khali chops away at some people as Tazz recommends hiding in the corner. There goes Duggan and Burke knocks out Richards, only to get tossed by Kane. It’s time for the required Kane vs. Khali fight before Miz is eliminated. Henry dumps out Yang and Moore and Jesse follows them both. There goes Murdoch and Festus is out, followed by Kendrick in a big crash.

Henry easily throws Kingston out and Palumbo tosses Noble…who lands on Kingston and climbs back inside (so THAT’S where Kingston learned it). Then he’s tossed out again. A bunch of people get together to toss Khali and Snitsky gets rid of Holly. We’re down to Kane, Snitsky and Henry, with the fans getting WAY into this. Snitsky spends too much time glaring and gets knocked out by Henry, leaving us with two. Henry’s gorilla press is broken up and Kane kicks him out for the win and the title shot (he would win the title in about ten seconds) at 6:22.

Rating: C. The important thing here is they kept it moving rather than waiting around for a long time. These things are only going to have a small handful of realistic winners so clearing them out that fast is a good way to go. ECW needed some bigger stars and Kane certainly fits the bill so this was a nice cross between smart and efficient.

From Wrestlemania XXIX.

Intercontinental Title: The Miz vs. Wade Barrett

Miz is challenging and kicks away in the corner, only to get hit in the face to cut that off. Barrett hammers away, shouts about Miz’s lack of awesomeness, but can’t hit the Wasteland. Miz can’t get the Skull Crushing Finale either though and Barrett is back with a swinging Boss Man Slam for two. The Bull Hammer misses though and Miz gets the Figure Four, giving us a reminder that Ric Flair gave the hold to the Miz. In case you hadn’t praised Flair enough recently you see. Barrett makes the rope and hits the Wasteland for two, only to get caught in the Figure Four for the tap and the title at 4:08.

Rating: C. Nothing much to see here, but at least we got a nice tribute to Ric Flair, who has absolutely nothing to do with this match. The match was just there for the sake of a moment to fire the fans up to start, as Miz would lose the title back to Barrett the next night. I like the idea of a Miz face run, but it wasn’t exactly working here, with the Figure Four not helping things.

From Wrestlemania XXVI.

Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Beretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

The NXT rookies come out to watch from the stage and more than a few of them would go on to be bigger than a lot of the people int his match. Primo and J are both out in a hurry as there are too many people in there to be able to focus. Henry tosses Beretta and Croft, followed by Chavo. Khali chops Henry out and then a bunch of people get together to toss him out. Cryme Tyme gets rid of Gallows and then Shad tosses JTG in a funny moment. We slow way down until Masters, Kidd, Smith and Kozlov are thrown out in a row.

Funaki, Goldust, Regal, Gaspard and Regal all go out in a hurry and Santino Hulks Up, meaning it’s a sting of Cobras. Finlay cuts that off and tosses him out, followed by Yang and Archer going out as well. Hornswoggle comes in and helps Finlay hit various people with the shillelagh before Carlito is tossed. We’re down to Finlay, Knox, Ryder and Tatsu, with Ryder eliminating Knox and Finlay at once. Tatsu clotheslines Ryder to the apron and then kicks him out for the win at 8:31.

Rating: C. Nothing to the match, as you probably expected, but Tatsu is the kind of fun guy that you want winning something like this. If you don’t have someone local to win the match, let someone young and energetic like Tatsu take it instead. It didn’t exactly lead anywhere for him, but it also didn’t hurt anyone so go with something entertaining.

Sidenote: Tatsu’s music was so freaking catchy!

From Wrestlemania XIX.

Raw Tag Team Titles: Chief Morley/Lance Storm vs. Kane/Rob Van Dam

Morley/Storm are defending and have the Dudley Boyz in their corner, albeit the Dudleys are not here voluntarily. It’s a brawl to start with Kane and Van Dam clearing the ring without much trouble. Van Dam hits a big running flip dive to take the champs out and we take a break.

Back with Morley grabbing a chinlock on Van Dam before missing a middle rope elbow. Kane comes in to clean house, including the side slam and top rope clothesline to Storm. Van Dam kicks Morley down and the chokeslam plants Storm. The Five Star is broken up but the Dudleys give Storm a 3D…and deck Van Dam to give Storm the pin at 5:41.

Rating: C+. This could have been on any given episode of Raw and, believe it or not, Kane and Van Dam won the titles the next night in a three way match. Kane and Van Dam worked well together and it makes sense to see them getting in a spot like this. Nice match, albeit with an ending that could have been a lot happier given what was happening the next day.

Overall Rating: C. This is a weird thing to see as the matches aren’t supposed to be show stealers or anything close. They’re designed to be there for the sake of getting the crowd warm without spending a lot of time or burning through a big match. The battle royals were fun enough and that’s all this was supposed to be. It’s nothing mind blowing and nothing that hasn’t been seen before, but I’ve seen far worse historic flashbacks.

 

 

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Wrestlemania XXVI
Date: March 28, 2010
Location: University of Phoenix Stadium, Glendale, Arizona
Attendance: 72,219
Commentators: Michael Cole, Jerry Lawler, Matt Striker
America The Beautiful: Fantasia

So last year at Wrestlemania XXV, Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker had one of the best matches ever. That means it’s time for a rematch, with Michaels career on the line. That is more than big enough for a special match, to the point where it makes John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title feel that less important. Let’s get to it.

Pre-Show: Battle Royal

Mark Henry, Shad Gaspard, JTG, Goldust, Yoshi Tatsu, Santino Marella, Primo, Kung Fu Naki, Slam Master J., Jimmy Wang Yang, Chris Masters, Vladimir Kozlov, Great Khali, Finlay, William Regal, Luke Gallows, Carlito, Tyler Reks, Zack Ryder, Lance Archer, Mike Knox, Caylen Croft, Trent Beretta, Tyson Kidd, David Hart-Smith, Chavo Guerrero

Prime is out within seconds, followed by Beretta and Croft at the same time. Henry launches Chavo out but then gets tossed by Khali. A bunch of people get together to toss Khali before Cryme Tyme gets rid of Gallows. Then Shad tosses JTG because that’s how battle royals work. Regal and Finlay slug it out for old times’ sake before everyone breaks off for fights of their own.

Masters keeps putting people in the Masterlock and is eliminated for not being that bright. Kozlov eliminates Kidd and Hart-Smith before being tossed out as well. Funaki, Goldust, Regal and Shad are out in a row, with Reks following them. Santino starts using the Cobra and thankfully is tossed out by Finlay.

Archer gets rid of Yang and is quickly dropkicked out by Tatsu (Striker continues to try and get “The Poison Fist Of The Pacific Rim” over as a nickname for Tatsu. This is because Striker is really annoying.). Knox gets to clean house for a bit but cue Hornswoggle for a distraction, allowing Finlay to get in a shillelagh shot. The Tadpole Splash hits Knox and Finlay tosses Carlito. Ryder eliminates Finlay and Knox at the same time, leaving Tatsu to kick Ryder out at 8:43.

Rating: C. It’s a battle royal to get a bunch of people on the show. They didn’t waste time here and it gave the fans something to see during the pre-show, which is about all you can ask for here. Tatsu was someone who seemed like he was ready to move forward more than once but it just never came together. It’s not like this was some big win but he was as good of a winner as you could have had.

Fantasia sings America The Beautiful. Not well but she does sing it.

The opening video talks about what it means to be at Wrestlemania and how important it is to be here. This is the big chance and the stars will seize it.

The set has something of an ancient pyramid theme with another over the ring, both of which look cool. If nothing else, I’ve always liked I Made It.

Tag Team Titles: ShoMiz vs. R-Truth/John Morrison

ShoMiz is defending and there isn’t much of a story here, save for Truth and Morrison winning a triple threat match to get the title shot. Miz and Morrison start things off with Morrison getting the better of things. Truth comes in with a top rope legdrop for two into a WHAT’S UP. It’s off to Show, who sends Truth flying with a fall away slam. What looks to be a Vader Bomb is broken up via a Morrison kick to the head, followed by Morrison’s knee to Miz’s head. Show breaks up Starship Pain though, leaving Truth’s dive to Show to fail miserably. Back in and Show KO Punches Morrison for the pin to retain at 3:25.

Rating: C-. Not much to this one and it really would have been better off as a pre-show match. They didn’t even get four minutes and there is only so much you can do with the amount of time you might get on a regular TV show. ShoMiz was a fairly forgettable team and while it was nice to have the titles on the card, it’s not like this was anything remotely memorable.

Video on Wrestlemania Week, which always looks cool.

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Legacy implodes as Orton has had it with the two of them screwing up and turned on them, setting up this for some revenge. DiBiase and Rhodes go after him to start and it doesn’t go well early on. Orton gets smart by dividing and conquering but walks into a dropkick from DiBiase. The double teaming is on with both of them taking turns to punch Orton while the other holds him back. There’s a double suplex to put Orton down but he fights out of the corner (the fans approve).

The comeback doesn’t last long though as DiBiase hits a clothesline, setting up a High/Low to put Orton down again. Rhodes snaps off an Alabama Slam for two and the save from DiBiase means it’s time for the young hooligans to fight. Orton fights up and sends DiBiase to the floor, followed by a snap powerslam back inside. There’s the backbreaker to Rhodes but DiBiase pulls Orton outside. Rhodes’ dive only hits DiBiase so Orton hits the double hanging DDT. With DiBiase down on the floor, Orton Punts Rhodes and then RKO’s an invading DiBiase for the pin at 9:02.

Rating: C+. There wasn’t much in the way of drama here once DiBiase and Rhodes got in their offense. Orton looked like he was toying with them at the end, which was part of the reason why he was turning into a popular star all over again. This was about Orton smashing through his former lackeys and showing them who the real star was, which he did in quite the destruction by the end.

Vickie Guerrero and company are ready for their ten woman tag. Jillian Hall comes in for a song and whole thing turns into a Slim Jim commercial, with Santino Marella having a bite to change Jillian. First she’s Mae Young, then Gene Okerlund (yes in the same dress) and finally Melina. Wacky….I guess you could call it fun? This isn’t on the Network due to the music.

Money In The Bank

Christian, Dolph Ziggler, Drew McIntyre, Jack Swagger, Evan Bourne, Kane, Kofi Kingston, Matt Hardy, MVP, Shelton Benjamin

This is the last Wrestlemania MITB match before it would go on to get its own show this same year. It’s the usual melee to start with almost everyone going outside. The first ladder is sent inside about thirty seconds in but a bunch of people stop to go after McIntyre rather than climbing. Almost everyone tries to go up but gets stopped, with Kane chokeslamming Bourne over the top for a crash onto more people.

Swagger and Hardy get trapped behind a ladder in the corner and Christian monkey flips Kingston into the ladder onto them. Ziggler breaks it up and makes the climb but MVP pulls him right back down. Kingston hammers on Kane in the corner, earning himself a powerbomb onto a ladder. Benjamin goes up this time so it’s Swagger spearing him with another ladder to break it up.

Swagger gets caught under a ladder so Hardy and Christian hit him with a ladder each. One of the ladders is bridged into another, with Bourne kicking Christian off the bridged version. Air Bourne hits Christian and Bourne goes up, only to be cut off by Hardy. Swagger cuts Hardy off though and shoves him onto the bridged ladder for the huge crash. Shelton and MVP go up but come crashing down, leaving everyone on the floor for a bit.

Kane goes up but has to cut off Ziggler, including a chokeslam onto the ladder. With Kane distracted, Kofi comes back in to kick him in the head but the only ladder available is broken. Kofi gets crazy creative by using the pieces like stilts and jumping up the rungs, only to have McIntyre make the save.

McIntyre goes up but Hardy shoves the ladder over for the big crotching on top. It’s Matt going up this time until Christian is there as well but they both have to knock Kane down. That’s not enough for Christian, who hits the reverse DDT off the ladder to plant Matt again. Christian goes up again, only to have Swagger make the save and pull the case down for the win at 13:29.

Rating: B-. It was a wild match as usual but there is only so much you can do with ten people in a match trying to get in as much time as possible. The stilts spot was very unique and stood out more than anything else, though the rest was little more than the usual big spots and crashes. Swagger winning is a surprise, but WWE was trying something new and that’s often a good idea.

We look back at last night’s Hall Of Fame ceremony.

The Class of 2010 is introduced:

Stu Hart (represented by eight relatives)
Wendi Richter (seems very happy to be there)
Mad Dog Vachon (sadly in a wheelchair)
Antonio Inoki (not the strongest reaction)
Bob Uecker (nice reception)
Gorgeous George (represented by his former wife)
Ted DiBiase (by far the strongest reaction)

Sweet goodness that Hall of Fame theme is always awesome.

We recap HHH vs. Sheamus. After debuting on Raw and winning the WWE Title within a few weeks, Sheamus was knocked out of the Elimination Chamber by HHH, costing him the title. Sheamus then went on to talk about how much he loved watching HHH while growing up. Then Sheamus laid him out, which HHH liked because it’s what he did when he went after the Ultimate Warrior in 1996 (and yes they explained how badly it went). That plus a need for revenge makes for a Wrestlemania match.

HHH vs. Sheamus

HHH’s entrance goes on for a good while, as you might have expected. Sheamus drives him into the corner to start but HHH hits him in the face. It’s way too early for the Pedigree though as Sheamus bails out to the floor. Back in and a suplex drops Sheamus again, setting up the knee drop for one.

HHH goes old school (shocking I know) as we hit the Figure Four, with Sheamus going straight to the ropes. The fight goes outside with HHH being whipped into the steps, followed by the (yet to be named) Irish Curse back inside. An ax handle to the head cuts HHH off again and Sheamus grabs the armbar.

We’ll make that a chinlock but HHH suplexes his way to freedom, sending Striker into a FAR too long….whatever you call what he does. HHH grabs a DDT and they’re both down, followed by the expected slugout. There’s the running knee into the facebuster for two and a neckbreaker drops Sheamus for the same.

The yet to be named Brogue Kick misses so HHH tries the Pedigree, only to be reversed into the Brogue Kick for two. The fans are rather behind HHH, who fights out of the High Cross (Razor’s Edge) and gets two more off a spinebuster. Sheamus rolls out to the apron and manages another Brogue Kick…but takes too long and gets Pedigreed out of nowhere for the pin at 11:47.

Rating: B-. This is the type of match that will work almost every single time as you had two big strong guys beating the fire out of each other until the ending. That’s the kind of brawl that both of them know how to do (though Sheamus would get WAY better later on) and it worked here. That being said, Sheamus is the up and comer and loses to HHH, which seems to be a bit counterproductive, but this would hardly be the first time that happened.

We recap CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio. After Mysterio cost Punk a spot in Money In The Bank, Punk scared the heck out of Mysterio’s daughter Aliyah. They then traded various attacks before Punk creepily sang Happy Birthday to Aliyah, which was too far. Now it’s time for their fight, with Mysterio having to join the Straight Edge Society if he loses.

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Punk has the Straight Edge Society (Luke Gallows and Serena) with him and talks about how these 70,000 people here are going to drink or try pills to make their problems go away. He can be their savior and lead them to a better place because he chooses to be drug free and better than everyone here. Mysterio is one of the Na’vi from Avatar, which isn’t quite the same as the superhero gear he tends to use.

Gallows offers an early distraction and Punk gets to stomp away in the corner before tying Mysterio in the Tree of Woe. A missed charge results in a crotching against the post though and they head to the floor…where Punk drops him face first onto the steps. Back in and Punk hammers away for two and we’re already in the chinlock. Mysterio fights out like he’s a top star who was in a chinlock and hits the springboard seated senton.

Punk snaps off a powerslam for two before hitting one heck of a kick to the head for the same. Four more near falls have Punk rather frustrated until Mysterio is up with a springboard moonsault DDT for two of his own. Mysterio’s frog splash misses to give Punk two more, meaning it’s time for even more frustration. Back up and Mysterio loads him up for the 619 but has to take out the Society. Not that it matters as the 619 into the springboard splash finishes Punk at 6:30.

Rating: C+. Another match that was good but they didn’t have the time to do very much. It had the stakes and they work well together, but there is only so much they can do when they have less than seven minutes. It makes perfect sense to have the loudmouth holier than thou heel get what’s coming to him and who better to do that than one of the resident superheroes?

We recap Bret Hart vs. Vince McMahon. Hart returned after thirteen years of bitterness after the Montreal Screwjob and of course Vince McMahon couldn’t let it to. Hart wanted to fight Vince at Wrestlemania but got turned down, only to have his leg broken in a car wreck in the parking lot. Then Vince agreed to fight him….and then Hart revealed he was gold bricking, because that’s just what Hart does.

Vince McMahon vs. Bret Hart

No Holds Barred. Hold on though as Vince grabs a mic and says he’s hired a bunch of lumberjacks, in the form of various members of the Hart Family. As a bonus, Bret’s brother Bruce can be guest referee! Bret isn’t overly shocked and says what’s done is done. If there is one thing about the Harts though, it’s that they got paid up front and the money is already in the bank.

If there is one thing he’s learned from the Montreal Screwjob, it’s there’s nothing better than a good double cross. The Harts, including Bret, are united, and tonight is the night that Bret screws Vince. The bell rings and Bret punches him down and chokes in the corner, with Vince bailing to the floor. That means the Harts can make it even worse, including a slap from Natalya (Striker: “Best luck in your future endeavors Natalya.”).

The Hart Dynasty hits a top rope Hart Attack to the floor and it’s time to throw Vince back inside. Bret works on the leg, which sends Vince outside again. This time he comes back in with tire iron but Bret knocks it away again and takes it away. Bret hammers away with the tire iron…and then does it some more…and more, to the point where unless Bret has the strength of a two year old, Vince should be in a coma.

The Sharpshooter is teased but Bret lets it go so he can use the tire iron again. Some low blows have Vince down again and let’s get a chair in there too. Bret sits down and then hits some hard chair shots to Vince’s back. The chair is bent up so Bret finally (and I do mean finally) grabs the Sharpshooter for the win at 11:08.

Rating: C. Ok so I’ve called this an A+ before because I love what they did with Vince being absolutely destroyed and not getting in a single bit of offense. This was never supposed to be anything but a massacre until the Sharpshooter…but my goodness how long did they go with the tire iron/chair shots? The thing here is that this is really only a match in name only so I’m not going to call it bad, but Bret couldn’t have mixed it up with some different stuff other than hitting him over and over with the same stuff?

A big Hart celebration ensues.

Wrestlemania XXVII is coming to Atlanta, Georgia.

Official attendance: 72,219.

We recap Chris Jericho vs. Edge for the Smackdown World Title. They were partners last year but Edge tore his Achilles. Edge came back at the Royal Rumble (at #29 in a great surprise) and won, setting up his title shot here. For some reason the build for this match involved Edge saying “spear” over and over until it lost all meaning.

Smackdown World Title: Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending. They start slowly with Jericho grabbing a headlock (Jericho: “Ask him!”) but Edge is right back with some running shoulders. Jericho is back with some stompings in the corner before sending Edge outside. That’s good for a long count before Edge comes back in and gets chinlocked. Jericho slowly stomps and slaps away, which takes long enough that Edge manages to send him shoulder first into the post.

A running shoulder sends Jericho into the announcers’ table and there’s a clothesline off the apron. They head back inside and hopefully pick up the energy a bit here. Back in and Edge gets two off a super gordbuster, followed by a middle rope sunset flip for the same. Jericho goes simple by kicking him in the head but the Codebreaker is blocked. The spear is countered into a quick Walls but Edge slips out.

The Lionsault misses and Edge is right back up with the Edge O Matic for two. Jericho’s enziguri gets two more but so does the Impaler as things slow back down a bit. Jericho mixes things up a bit with a middle rope forearm to the back of the head (Edge was nice enough to look over his shoulder before Jericho jumped), only to have his own spear cut off by a big boot.

The real spear is countered into a Codebreaker for a rather delayed two. Jericho starts going after the ankle before switching to the Walls. We’ll make that a half Walls to stay on the bad ankle but the rope is grabbed. Edge’s rollup for two is also grabbed and they crash out to the floor for a breather. The frustrated Jericho grabs the belt and the referee gets distracted, allowing Jericho’s belt shot to get two. The Codebreaker to a limping Edge retains the title at 15:47.

Rating: B. This was good but it never hit that next level and it made things kind of disappointing. Edge only teased the spear once and never got a big near fall. I was expecting something a lot more epic than we got here and that just didn’t happen. There were some shenanigans due to the belt shot but this needed to be more intense and violent given what Edge was saying coming in.

Post match Jericho goes after Edge again but Edge hits a spear off the announcers’ table and through the barricade as the feud must continue.

We look at the pre-show battle royal.

Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse/Vickie Guerrero vs. Beth Phoenix/Eve Torres/Gail Kim/Kelly Kelly/Mickie James

Get the women on the show special. Vickie bumps Gail to start and turns around to pose, only to run into Phoenix. The non-Vickie team takes turns beating on Vickie in the corner, who asks if Kelly knows who she is. That earns Vickie a kick to the ribs with McCool making the save. Everything breaks down and we hit the parade of finishers, leaving Vickie crying in the corner as Beth comes up behind her. McCool makes another save and the Hog Splash (Cole’s name) finishes Kelly at 3:29.

Rating: D. Oh what else were you expecting here? A bunch of the people barely did anything, there were a bunch of Vickie fat jokes, Lawler drooled over most of them and Striker continues to try to make everything sound like the most important moment ever because it gets people paying attention to him. Terrible match and little more than a way for Vickie to keep her heat.

We recap John Cena challenging Batista for the Raw World Title. Cena got the title back in the Elimination Chamber but Vince McMahon allowed Batista an immediate title shot. Now it’s time for the fair rematch, with Batista talking about being tired of Cena being the star when they got big at the same time. You can pretty much ignore all of those details though and just go with “It’s John Cena vs. Batista for the WWE Title at Wrestlemania.”

Raw World Title: Batista vs. John Cena

Batista is defending and Cena’s big entrance is from the United States Air Force Honor Guard Drill Team. We get the Big Match Intros before they fight over a lockup. Batista grabs a headlock before running Cena over, only to have Cena come back with a headlock of his own. That’s broken up and Batista sends him hard into the corner for the running clothesline to the back of the head.

Some cranking on the neck has Cena down but he manages a release suplex (that didn’t look great) and the bulldog connects for two. It’s way too early for the AA though as Batista reverses into a DDT for two of his own. A chinlock with a bodyscissors keeps Cena down for a bit, only to have him power up and start slugging away. Batista sticks with what has been working by grabbing a neckbreaker for two more.

The front chancery keeps Cena in trouble until he powers up again. The STF goes on out of nowhere but Batista grabs the rope like a bad villain should. Batista is fine enough to hit a spear for two before loading Cena up top. The superplex attempt is blocked and Cena hits a super Five Knuckle Shuffle of all things.

Batista gets back up and hits his namesake Bomb for two, giving us a great shocked face. Back up Cena counters another Batista Bomb into the AA (toss variation) for two, leaving them both down. Cena goes up but dives into a spinebuster (how Batista injured Cena’s neck a few years ago), only to have the Batista Bomb reversed into the STF (with Cena giving him a LONG talk) for the tap at 13:29.

Rating: B. It’s good and they were getting to the big stuff but I was expecting longer than just shy of fourteen minutes. Cena getting the title back is the right way to go for him though as he can put someone else over rather soon. Batista was not quite what he used to be but these two instantly make for an epic feel. Not a classic match, though they didn’t do anything wrong with the setup and finish going rather well.

Cena poses with a guy in a WE HATE CENA shirt for a funny moment.

We recap Shawn Michaels vs. Undertaker. Shawn lost to him the previous year before, leaving Shawn obsessed with having to get the win. It is so big that Shawn is willing to put his career on the line against the Streak, saying he doesn’t have a career if he can’t beat the Undertaker. Not that it matters as this feels absolutely huge and you know it’s going to go well.

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

No DQ. The entrances are absolutely epic and you know that you’re about to see something special. They also take their sweet time getting to the ring and it builds up even more, with Shawn staring at Undertaker the entire way to the ring. Undertaker charges at him to start but Shawn is right there with the chops. Shawn gets flipped into the corner, setting up Snake Eyes into the big boot.

Old School connects but Undertaker comes up limping a bit. The chokeslam is loaded up but the knee gives out, with Shawn wisely kicking away at the leg. The Tombstone is broken up as well so Shawn starts in on the shoulder, which is a bit of an odd choice given UNDERTAKER IS LIMPING.

Undertaker slips out but has to block a quick superkick attempt as things reset a bit. The logic kicks in as Shawn starts going after the knee in the corner but Undertaker clotheslines him to the floor. The Taker Dive is loaded up but Shawn comes back in to take out the knee in a rather smart move. It’s too early for the Figure Four and they head outside, where Shawn is rammed back first into the post. The apron legdrop connects but Shawn goes after the leg again to take over.

Now the Figure Four goes on until Undertaker sits up. Shawn: “No.” And Undertaker goes back down. Well that was polite of him. Undertaker turns it over so Shawn wisely lets go and they take a breather. Back up and they strike it out until Undertaker grabs a quick chokeslam for two. The Tombstone is escaped again though and Shawn grabs the ankle lock, complete with a grapevine.

Undertaker finally uses the good leg to kick his way to freedom so Shawn sends him outside. A springboard spinning crossbody is pulled out of the air so Undertaker hit the Tombstone on the floor to knock Shawn silly. Medics come out to check on Shawn but Undertaker isn’t having that and throws him back inside for two, meaning frustration is setting in. This might have more of an impact if MATT STRIKER WOULD SHUT UP for once, but instead he needs to keep shouting what he thinks sound like highlight reel worthy lines.

The Last Ride is loaded up but Undertaker’s knee gives out and they crash down, with Shawn getting two off a faceplant. Shawn’s top rope elbow only hits raised knees, which have Undertaker in even more pain. Hell’s Gate goes on but Shawn flips over into a rollup for two. Shawn hits a quick Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere for two but another attempt is countered into a heck of a Last Ride for two more.

They go outside and it’s time to load up the announcers’ table. That takes too long though and it’s a superkick to knock Undertaker onto the table instead. In something that couldn’t possibly go wrong, Shawn goes up and moonsaults down onto Undertaker, mostly hitting his feet/lower legs, which does tie into everything so far. Shawn realizes he has a chance and throws Undertaker inside and hits a clean Sweet Chin Music (that has to be the fourth or fifth) for two, with Cole telegraphing the kickout by screaming that Streak was over.

Another superkick is countered into a chokeslam but Undertaker can barely move, let alone cover. Instead it’s a Tombstone (with tongue) for two and we get another stunned face. Shawn can’t get up so Undertaker loads up the throat slit….but stops. Undertaker tells him to stay down as Shawn pulls himself up and then slaps Undertaker in the face, admitting that he can’t do it and basically telling Undertaker to finish him off. The jumping Tombstone does just that at 24:00.

Rating: A+. What do you want me to say here? This is an absolute masterpiece and one of the best matches either of them have ever had if not their best ever. The leg stuff played a role throughout until Shawn gave it everything he had but just couldn’t do it in the end. It told an amazing story with some great action, including multiple near falls where you could buy it being over. It’s better than I remember it being and one of the best main events in Wrestlemania history.

Undertaker needs the ropes to get to his feet and Shawn finally gets up. Undertaker says something to him we can’t see and they hug before Undertaker leaves him alone in the ring. Shawn gets to soak in the THANK YOU SHAWN chants before doing the long walk up the ramp. Shawn: “I’m gonna drive my kids crazy in three weeks!” He looks back again and walks off to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. This is a weird show as there isn’t much that is Wrestlemania worthy. Edge vs. Jericho is just good, Money in the Bank is its usual ok self, HHH vs. Sheamus is a slightly above average power brawl and Batista vs. Cena wasn’t even fifteen minutes long. Those are the high points though, as the rest of the show is pretty much mediocre/forgettable to bad. That doesn’t make for a great Wrestlemania, but this show is usually pretty well remembered.

That’s because of the main event and my goodness does it deserve the praise it receives. I’ve seen it a few times now and it pulled me in again with how epic of a showdown they were having here. It felt like a Wrestlemania main event match and you do not get those very often. That match alone makes this Wrestlemania worth seeing, though I would definitely recommend fast forwarding a good bit of the midcard, as it was quite the miss in multiple places.

Ratings Comparison

Battle Royal

Original: N/A
2013 Redo: N/A
2015 Redo: D+
2024 Redo: C

Awesome Truth vs. ShoMiz

Original: D
2013 Redo: D+
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: C-

Randy Orton vs. Ted DiBiase vs. Cody Rhodes

Original: D+
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Christian vs. Matt Hardy vs. Kane vs. Jack Swagger vs. Kofi Kingston vs. Drew McIntyre vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. MVP vs. Evan Bourne

Original: B
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

HHH vs. Sheamus

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C+
2015 Redo: C+
2024 Redo: B-

CM Punk vs. Rey Mysterio

Original: B-
2013 Redo: C
2015 Redo: C
2024 Redo: C+

Mr. McMahon vs. Bret Hart

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: C

Edge vs. Chris Jericho

Original: A-
2013 Redo: B
2015 Redo: B-
2024 Redo: B

Beth Phoenix/Kevin Kelly/Mickie James/Gail Kim/Eve Torres vs. Vickie Guerrero/Alicia Fox/Laycool/Maryse

Original: F
2013 Redo: D
2015 Redo: D
2024 Redo: D

John Cena vs. Batista

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: B+
2024 Redo: B

Undertaker vs. Shawn Michaels

Original: A+
2013 Redo: A+
2015 Redo: A
2024 Redo: A+

Overall Rating

Original: A
2013 Redo: B+
2015 Redo: A-
2024 Redo: B-

That’s quite a drop for the overall rating but some of the lower matches just don’t hold up as well.

 

 

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Smackdown
Date: August 8, 2008
Location: Phillips Arena, Atlanta, Georgia
Commentators: Jim Ross, Tazz

We are just over a week away from Summerslam and Edge is hopefully getting back on track. That is something he has been needing for a bit and it might have happened last week. In another thing that needs to pick up the pace, we have HHH vs. Great Khali for the former’s World Title. Let’s get to it.

Here are last week’s results if you need a recap.

We open with a look back at Edge snapping on Mick Foley last week.

Opening sequence.

Tazz is filling in for the injured Mick Foley. Commentary runs down the card.

Maryse/Natalya/Victoria vs. Maria/Michelle McCool/Cherry

They’re all in various Olympic sports attire, though Maria picks skiing for the summer games. McCool (volleyball) and Natalya (equestrian) start things off with McCool gabbing a Russian legsweep. A middle rope wristdrag takes Natalya down but Maria tags herself in for a double shoulder. Natalya sends Maria outside but Cherry (boxing) comes in with a double arm DDT. It’s off to Victoria for the Widow’s Peak, only for McCool to kick her in the face. Everything breaks down and Natalya Sharpshooters Maria for the fast win. This was a mini theme match and you can pretty easily get the reason why.

Bam Neely has been attacked and there is a black rose near him.

Zack Ryder/Curt Hawkins vs. Shannon Moore/Jimmy Wang Yang

Non-title. Hawkins headlocks Yang to start but gets armdragged into an armbar. Back up and Hawkins fights out of the corner and hits a reverse clothesline, allowing Ryder to come in for a swinging neckbreaker. Hawkins comes in off a blind tag and breaks up a sunset flip, setting up a suplex for two on Yang. We hit the reverse chinlock but Yang slips out and hands it back to Moore to clean house. A high crossbody gets two on Ryder but the referee has to get rid of Yang, allowing a double inverted DDT to finish Moore.

Rating: C+. I’ve long since thought Yang and Moore could have been a bigger deal in the tag division as it isn’t like there was much competition. They had a nice match here and it made for a good use of a few minutes. If nothing else, it made the champions look good, which is always a nice move.

MVP wants to face Jeff Hardy at Summerslam. We see a clip of MVP costing Jeff Hardy a match against Edge on Saturday Night’s Main Event, but where is the footage of Hardy attacking MVP? Hardy is a product of his own actions.

Jeff Hardy vs. Shelton Benjamin

Non-title. Benjamin takes him down without much trouble and grabs an early chinlock. Hardy fights up and it’s an armdrag into an armbar as they already see to be filling time. That’s broken up and Benjamin stomps away in the corner before going back to the chinlock. This one doesn’t last as long as Hardy fights up and hits the mule kick out to the floor, where the slingshot dive connects. Back in and a quick Swanton attempt misses to give Benjamin two and we take a break.

We come back with Benjamin grabbing another chinlock, though at least his legs are facing another way to make it different. Back up and Hardy tries the Whisper In The Wind, only to get dropped hard onto the ropes for two. Benjamin starts in on the leg as Tazz talks about fatigue setting in. From what? Excessive chinlock usage? Benjamin starts cranking on the leg, including a half crab for a change.

That’s broken up so Benjamin puts it on again as we’re seeing quite the repetitive theme emerging. Hardy escapes again and they go outside, where Benjamin gets kicked out of the air. Back in and the Whisper In The Wind connects, only for Benjamin to reverse the slingshot dropkick into a powerslam for two. Paydirt is countered into the Twist Of Fate and Hardy hits the Swanton…but gets kicked in the face by MVP for the DQ.

Rating: C+. This got going near the end but they easily could have cut off about five minutes o the chinlocks and leg cranking. The latter wouldn’t have made much of a difference as Hardy’s leg looked fine when he was making his comeback. This wasn’t quite as bad as some of the recent dull matches, but it was definitely following a similar formula.

La Familia can’t find Zack Ryder and something might have happened to him.

And now, arm wrestling between HHH and Great Khali, with broken glass on the table for whichever hand goes down. Before we get going, Khali says something, which HHH says is a good point, even though he has no idea what Khali said. Runjin Singh says Khali told him to get out while he can because this is a different kind of challenge. HHH tells Singh to find a lamp to rub to put Khali back inside.

The reality is Khali has never been in the ring with someone like HHH, who is actually going to tell Khali his plans in advance. HHH is going to break Khali’s legs and there is nothing Singh or the jolly genie can do about it. With that out of the way, we’re ready to go and believe it or not, HHH is about to win when Khali attacks him. The head vice leaves HHH laying and commentary isn’t sure how he is going to survive at Summerslam. This was every step you would have expected, probably right down to the genie jokes.

Curt Hawkins has been attacked and there is another black rose.

We get another R-Truth video, talking about where he came from and showing him playing basketball with his friends. If you want to play the game, you have to get into it, and that is the truth.

Chavo Guerrero thinks he and Vickie Guerrero need Edge’s help to deal with this so he’s off to find him.

Vladimir Kozlov vs. Jesse

Jesse, with Festus, is the better competition that Kozlov requested. The bell rings so Kozlov bails from the crazed Festus before kicking Jesse down to take over. Headbutts and a suplex have Jesse in trouble but he gets in a shot of his own. Kozlov then headbutts him out of the air for the pin.

Raw Rebound.

Summerslam rundown.

Chavo Guerrero found Edge and he is willing to help with Undertaker’s attacks, but Vickie Guerrero has to be civil.

Brian Kendrick vs. Super Crazy

Before the match, Kendrick brags about his power and introduces his bodyguard, Ezekiel Jackson (now with a last name). Kendrick knocks him into the corner to start and a dropkick puts Crazy down again. Back up and Crazy misses a charge into the corner so another dropkick can connect for two.

The camel clutch goes on as Tazz makes insect comparisons. Kendrick kicks him down again and grabs something like a seated abdominal stretch. That’s broken up as Tazz wonders why Crazy, a Smackdown wrestler, is wearing an ECW shirt. A tilt-a-whirl backbreaker puts Kendrick down and a standing moonsault gets two. Jackson offers a distraction though, allowing Kendrick to hit the Kendrick for the pin.

Rating: C. Crazy was starting to fight back when he got cut off through the pretty stereotypical means. Kendrick continues to look and feel different while making me want to se more of what he’s doing. That’s a great sign and it was another fine performance, even if it didn’t have much time.

Post match Jackson torture racks Crazy.

Edge comes in to see the Guerreros and says he and Vickie can get by this. As the head of the family, Edge has a plan but it has to be his way. Vickie agrees so they head to the ring, where, after a break, Edge calls Undertaker out and even demands he use the powers. Edge then grabs a chair and cracks Chavo in the back, setting up a Conchairto. Edge turns Vickie’s wheelchair over and says he is who Vickie needs to worry about. Undertaker needs to worry about Edge taking him to h***, but he’s taking La Familia with him. Especially Vickie. Nice little twist there as Edge continues to be built back up before Summerslam.

Overall Rating: C. As has been the case lately, the wrestling wasn’t great but the other stuff didn’t bail it out here. The arm wrestling stuff went on forever and while the Edge surprise as the end was nice, it only got them so far. They need to get to Summerslam now, but they also need something better than HHH vs. Khali as a secondary match. Not the worst show, but Edge continues to carry this thing on his back.

 

 

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