Impact Wrestling – May 17, 2012: A Two Hour Trailer

Impact Wrestling
Date: May 17, 2012
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the first show after Sacrifice and Roode is still champion, which isn’t something that should surprise you. Other than that, not a lot changed at the PPV. The only real change is that we have new tag team champions in the form of Daniels and Kazarian. We should begin building up for Slammiversary too. Let’s get to it.

Here’s Roode to open the show. Gee I wonder what he’s going to be saying. It’s the same promo you’ve always heard from him with him talking about how he’s the best and no one can stop him. Next week he’s going to have The It Factor’s Celebration Of Domination, which is a party of some kind. First of all though, he needs Hogan out here. Cue the guy who is somehow still the NEW GM, about six weeks after getting the job.

Roode has demands for Hogan for next week. He wants a redecorated dressing room and five bottles of chilled champagne plus only green M and M’s. Also he wants gold confetti flown in from Canada. Hogan takes the list and talks about some great champions. He talks about how Roode brought stability to the show, but he hasn’t broken the record yet. Next week is Open Fight Night, and the world title will be on the line.

Hogan talks about taking a poll in the back of people that might want a shot next week. The locker room empties out and apparently they all want a shot next week. Hogan says we need to get this down to four men, so tonight there will be four singles matches. The winners will advance to some kind of competition next week and the winner will get a title match later next week. The matches are Ray vs. RVD, Hardy vs. Anderson (nice job on screwing the PPV fans again guys), Angle vs. Joe, and a battle royal.

We get a clip of Abyss saying Joseph is getting too close to the fire.

Rob Van Dam vs. Bully Ray

Rob is very banged up from the ladder match and Ray goes after the bad arm. Van Dam kicks his way out of it as usual and Rolling Thunder gets two. Ray goes after the knee but Rob kicks away again. He goes up top and tries the top rope kick, but hurts his knee in the process. Bubba Cutter (called a 3D by Tenay) gets the pin at 3:22.

Rating: C-. This was a short match and it felt even shorter. That being said it wasn’t really that bad as the leg injury from the PPV played in here, which is a good thing. Ray moving on is a good thing as I find him more interesting than Rob, who is more or less just there because of his past work. Ray using the Cutter is a good thing.

Post break Bully Ray rants about……the Kardashians? Apparently they’re about anti-bullying now and he wants to fight them. Joseph Park comes in and apologizes for interfering on Sunday. He thinks Ray is the fire that Abyss was talking about. Ray says stay away.

We see a segment from MMA Uncensored of King Mo, an MMA fighter, announcing that he’s signing with TNA and fighting for Bellator at the same time. There’s some MMA analyst and Dixie Carter there too. Not much is said.

Gail rants to Madison about having to be in a triple threat match tonight. Madison says there’s no guy she likes, even though she admitted to there being one recently. Brooke and Velvet come up after Madison leaves to fix her hair. They make fun of Gail for cheating and say one of them will win the title.

Battle Royal

This is a qualifying match as well. Aries gets an entrance pre-break. After a break AJ, ODB and Eric Young get entrances as well. Also in there are guys like Magnus, D-Von, Crimson, Garrett Bischoff and others. ODB and Eric hit a double clothesline on Crimson and all three go out. The Rob’s and Gunner are in there too. I think that’s everyone. There are eight more I think. Magnus goes to the apron and Aries dropkicks him out. Madison is watching from the apron and is all smiley but we’re not sure at whom.

After a few minutes of nothing going on, Robbie E puts out Robbie T. T is annoyed but D-Von puts out E anyway. So it’s Gunner, Garrett, D-Von, AJ and Aries as we take a break. Back with all five still in. AJ and Aries work together on Gunner and D-Von kills Garrett with a shoulder. Garrett low bridges D-Von to eliminate him, probably getting a title match later.

AJ Peles the tar out of Garrett and eliminates him. Gunner gets dropkicked down (not eliminated) and it’s AJ vs. Aries in a showdown. Aries hits a spinning forearm and it’s time for counters. A Superman forearm staggers Aries and AJ goes to the apron, but Aries charges. That lets Gunner knock Aries to the floor but AJ dumps Gunner to advance at 10:56.

Rating: C+. Fun stuff here and AJ is the perfect placeholder or even a potential winner for next week’s fourway. The Garrett push is likely to continue with a TV Title shot next week. The stuff at the end was good too as they treated AJ vs. Aries as a big deal, which to be fair it kind of is. Aries still needs to drop the title soon though.

We recap the AJ/Dixie photos stuff from the last few weeks.

Back with AJ in the ring. He says he’ll win the title next week but now it’s time to discuss the pictures. Nothing happened and they’re just business partners. They’re both married but it’s not like that. Things aren’t as they seem, but here are Daniels and Kaz. They imply that AJ has slept his way to the top and have video to prove it. They pull out an iPad and show AJ and Dixie going into a hotel room together.

We get a video from Genesis 2006 and Joe’s first loss, which was to Angle.

Joe comes up to Angle and they talk about the past. Angle slaps Joe and it’s on in the back with Angle getting a beating. Other wrestlers break it up.

Anderson looks at a video and thinks Jeff kicked out.

Moment #7 in TNA history is the Unbreakable triple threat.

Mr. Anderson vs. Jeff Hardy

Slow feeling out process to start until Jeff sends him to the floor. Jeff tries a dive of some kind but Anderson grabs the feet and slams him into the mat. Jeff comes back with a slingshot clothesline for two. Anderson hits his neckbreaker for the same. Anderson tries a kick to the head but Jeff chop blocks him to slow things down. A rollup by Jeff is countered into one by Anderson for two. Whisper in the Wind gets two. Anderson hits the Regal Roll but Jeff rolls back on him for the pin at 6:04.

Rating: C-. Not a terrible match here but these two just aren’t interesting at all together. Anderson is possibly moving towards a heel turn but it’s still nothing that’s going to make me care about him. This was better than their PPV match, but the chemistry was still severely lacking.

Video on Joe winning the world title from Angle at Lockdown 08.

Knockouts Title: Gail Kim vs. Brooke Tessmacher vs. Velvet Sky

Gail keeps trying to escape but gets double teamed and sent to the floor. The good girls trade small packages and that’s about it. Gail comes back in for a Boston Crab on Brooke but Velvet hooks a dragon sleeper at the same time on Gail. Gail tries an Octopus hold on Brooke but Velvet rolls her up for two. Kim doesn’t let go and rolls Brooke up for two. A top rope missile dropkick by the champ puts all three girls down. In Yo Face to Brooke but Gail throws Velvet to the floor and pins Brooke with a rollup at 4:42.

Rating: C. They tried some new stuff here and for the most part it worked, but at the end of the day it’s still the same girls that are only ok in the ring and Gail is still boring as champion. This was entertaining enough though and that’s the whole point. And they’re still better than the Divas.

Slammiversary video.

Kurt Angle vs. Samoa Joe

Joe knocks him to the floor but Angle double legs him down easily. Joe speeds things up and hits his usual strikes and drops his knee for two. The Facewash keeps Angle down in the corner as Roode comes out to do commentary. We take a break and come back with Angle in control. He knocks Joe down for two and hooks a chinlock.

Joe comes back with the powerslam but walks into the Germans to give Kurt control again. The Slam is countered into the Clutch which is countered into the ankle lock which is countered by Joe sending Angle into the corner. Angle hits the Slam for two, which really shouldn’t surprise anyone at this point. There’s the ankle lock again but Joe sends him into the corner. They go to the corner and Angle headbutts him away. A sunset flip into a rollup off the top gets the pin for Angle at 12:26.

Rating: B-. Good match but not quite as good as most of their matches. By not quite, I mean not even close. Joe is a guy you can throw into a place like this and it’s good to see him getting wins and being in big spots again, but he’s still nothing compared to what he used to be. Still though, this was built up as a big match and it mostly delivered.

The four challengers surround Roode to end the show.

Overall Rating: B-. Pretty good show here tonight but they’re using the single angle idea again here, which isn’t something I’m usually a fan of. In other words, this was almost all about next week and if that’s not your thing, too bad because this wasn’t a show for you. Still though the wrestling here worked and that’s all that matters for the most part. We have a big match set for next week’s Open Fight Night, which hopefully is better than the first. Good show.

Bully Ray b. Rob Van Dam – Bully Cutter
AJ Styles won a battle royal last eliminating Gunner
Jeff Hardy b. Mr. Anderson – Crucifix
Gail Kim b. Brooke Tessmacher and Velvet Sky – Rollup to Tessmacher
Kurt Angle b. Samoa Joe – Rollup

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1 comment

  1. Jay says:

    You forgot to mention Taz calling the Battle Royal the Greatest Battle Royal he’s ever seen. I about burst out laughing when he said that.