Monday Night Raw – December 20, 1999: If You Don’t Like Stephanie And HHH, RUN AWAY VERY FAST!

Monday Night Raw
Date: December 20, 1999
Location: Compaq Center, Houston, Texas
Attendance: 12,063
Commentators: Jim Ross, Doc Hendrix

This is a Raw request which I don’t remember the reason for. We’re just past Armageddon 1999 and Big Show is world champion. We’re inching closer to the Rumble and I would have expected to do the January 3 show which is the one where HHH won the title from Show. I don’t remember anything specific about this show so let’s get to it.

HHH and Stephanie, who are currently in power, are in the back to open the show. The Mean Street Posse are around them. Stephanie was insanely hot at times back in the day. She says that tonight, they’re going to spread some holiday cheer around here. We’ll start with this.

Test vs. New Age Outlaws

Test jumps Billy during the entrance but Road Dogg jumps Test to take over. The Hardys/Edge/Christian are watching in the back. Roadie’s dropkick gets two on Test as the tall Canadian is in trouble. A double backdrop is countered into a double DDT from Test and the Outlaws are down. A big boot puts Billy down again as does a gutwrench powerbomb. The pumphandle to Roadie is broken up by a dropkick from Billy which gets two. Test’s nose mask is taken off and the Fameasser get the pin. This was about what you would expect it to be.

HHH and Stephanie are pleased. Edge/Christian and the Hardys come in because they’re tired of fighting each other. HHH says ok then, let’s have Edge/Matt vs. Jeff/Christian.

Post break the relatively new Kurt Angle comes in to see the bosses and HHH makes Angle vs. Viscera, which doesn’t please his wife.

Edge/Matt Hardy vs. Christian/Jeff Hardy

The Hardys come out together as do the Canadians. Edge and Matt jump the other guys to start before it’s Edge vs. Jeff to get us going officially. They head to the floor and Christian dives on Edge while Jeff slides back in and dives on Matt. Back in and Edge slams Jeff off the top while Matt hits a Razor’s Edge Bomb for two on Christian. Off to Matt vs. Jeff with the black haired one firmly in control.

Back to Edge with a snap suplex for two. The fans chant for Terri as Jeff finally gets the tag to Christian. He cleans house but hits Jeff out of instinct. In an interesting bit, everyone hits their finishers on their regular partners for two. Edge and Matt can’t quite hit Poetry in Motion, allowing Christian to hit the Unprettier on Matt followed by a 450 from Jeff for the pin.

Rating: C+. The match itself was fun but I’m not sure if the idea behind it was all that interesting. The fans weren’t all that into it because I think they just wanted to see these four have their usual awesome matches. Instead we got a pretty good match which wasn’t incredibly interesting. Still though, points for trying at least.

Moolah and Mae come in to see HHH and Stephanie. HHH makes jokes about their age before offering Mae some alcohol. He changes his mind though and says tonight there’s going to be a triple threat tag match: the Acolytes vs. the Dudleys vs. Moolah/Mae. Oh dear.

After a break here are HHH and Stephanie in the arena, apparently to give JR his Christmas gift. JR is brought into the ring and Stephanie yells at him for something in Entertainment Weekly where Vince and Rock were praised for making WWF so entertaining. HHH says he and Stephanie were the ones that made this place entertaining so let’s decorate the place accordingly. On the mini-trons next to the main screen, HHH and Stephanie’s pictures replace the Raw logo. Subtle.

Stephanie talks about how fun it was to slap JR last week but says this is going to feel even better. HHH gets behind JR as Stephanie shoves him down, sending JR to the mat. Cue Mankind who says he can’t stand anymore of this. You can tell he’s serious because he quotes Popeye. He tells HHH to pick on him instead of JR and says the McMahon-Helmsley Era kind of sucks.

Stephanie’s Santa hat gives Santa a bad name because Stephanie is a ho. Steph has to hold HHH back but HHH lets up. He says he has an idea but it takes him forever to get it out. Mankind will have a Boiler Room match tonight but it won’t be with HHH. Stephanie slaps Mankind and says Merry Christmas.

Kurt Angle vs. Viscera

This is during Kurt’s goofy period which was hilarious. Before the match he talks about the Three I’s: Intensity, integrity and intelligence. The goofy look on his face is great. Angle starts by trying to go behind Viscera but is easily bulldogged down. Viscera easily overpowers him and hits a Samoan Drop for no cover. Angle comes back with some dropkicks including one off the top. Steve Blackman, who has been having issues with Angle lately, comes out and blasts Viscera with a kendo stick for no apparent reason, allowing Kurt to hit the not yet named Angle Slam for the quick pin.

Stephanie thinks Angle is cute.

Moolah and Mae are ready.

So are the Dudleys.

The Acolytes are too.

Fabulous Moolah/Mae Young vs. Acolytes vs. Dudley Boys

The Dudleys are brand new and insane here while the Acolytes are big evil guys. D-Von tells the ladies the Dudley Commandments: Thou shall not steal, thou shall not kill, and thou shall not mess with the Dudleys. That was a good catchphrase back in the day. They rush the ring and beat the women down before the Acolytes get here. The Acolytes take their sweet time getting here before beating up the Dudleys. Moolah and Mae hit a held Bubba but he escapes and PUNCHES THEM IN THE FACE. Mae Young gets What’s Up for the pin. This was insane but perversely entertaining.

Mark Henry comes out for the save post match.

HHH gives Stephanie a present: a Santa Claus. That’s Mankind’s opponent tonight apparently. Oh dear.

Mankind vs. Santa Claus

This is in the boiler room. Mankind isn’t sure how his kids are going to handle this. The Posse shows up and jumps Mankind before he goes in and now the real fight begins. Mankind: “Did I just get beaten up by the Mean Street Posse???? That’s embarrassing!” Santa is in the boiler room and Mankind explains the rules to him but says Santa can walk out and win. Three more Santas run in and beat up Mankind but he fights them off with a trashcan.

There are two more Santas in front of the door but they’re pretty quickly dispatched. Oh those two are the Outlaws. There’s a cookie sheet in the boiler room for no apparent reason. Mankind sings some carols but another Santa pops up to hit Mankind with his sack. The final one is HHH. JR: “I’d know that nose anywhere.” Santa wins. File this one under “what are the writers on, because I want some of it.”

Al Snow wants a match with Rock and since it’s Christmas time, he gets it. This was during Snow’s odd heel period. Oh and it’s a Brahma Bull Rope match.

Intercontinental Title: Godfather vs. Chris Jericho

Jericho is defending. The Ho’s look good tonight. Sweet goodness Godfather was over. Godfather goes off on Jericho to start and punches him down. This is pretty soon after Jericho debuted so he’s still a jerk. Jericho low bridges Godfather to send him to the floor followed by a springboard dropkick to send Godfather back to the floor again. An attempted powerbomb on the floor is countered and Godfather makes his comeback. He slams Jericho down and kicks him into the corner as Chyna comes down. With the Ho’s distracting the referee for no apparent reason, Chyna hits Godfather low so Jericho can retain. Another short match.

Terri and BB (a big chested chick) are told they’re in a Top Rope Topless Match. Basically it’s a match between two guys and when the respective guy is thrown over the top, his respective chick loses an article of clothing. The winning guy gets a shot at Jericho on Smackdown.

European Title: Val Venis vs. Hardcore Holly

Venis is defending and this is the topless thing. BB is with Val and Terri is with Holly. Apparently this isn’t for Val’s European Title so scratch the first part of the line. Before the match, Val compares women to Christmas trees: they’re pretty at first but they look great when he plugs it in. Apparently this is for the title. Ok then. HHH comes out to host this and get a better view.

Feeling out process to start but Val’s powerbomb is countered into a rana over the top, meaning both girls have to strip. They take the dresses off and we’re back to the men fighting. Holly hits the signature dropkick and sends Val over the top rope and eventually to the floor, making him the winner but not champion despite him being called the challenger more than once. As usual, since this was barely wrestling I’m not rating it.

Terri leaves and BB takes her top off but only HHH gets to see.

We get a clip from Smackdown with Rock costing Al Snow a match against Mankind due to some trickery.

Al Snow vs. The Rock

This is a Brahma Bullrope match, which means they’re tied up but it’s pin/submission to win. The place goes bonkers for Rock. Before the match, Rock says he has two choices. He can walk up the ramp and let Snow win, or he can beat Snow all over Houston. Rock starts beating Snow up before the rope is even tied up. They’re tied now and Snow is sent into the post and clotheslined down on the floor. Back inside and Snow gets a shot with the bell to the head of Rock for two.

Snow stomps on Rock as the fans are already chanting for Rock. For the life of me I don’t get why they would turn Snow heel. If there has ever been a guy who is just a bad fit as a heel, it’s Snow. Snow chokes with the rope and even tries to hang him. The announcers try to call this Rock’s signature match, even though this is one of only two or three I remember him being in.

A Samoan Drop gets two for Rock and here come the punches. Snow hits the referee low followed by a bell shot to Rock. Snow gets a chair but Rock counters into a DDT. Cue the Outlaws who are quickly dispatched. Rock loads up the Elbow but Road Dogg hits him with a chair, giving Snow a two count. Billy comes in with a Fameasser to Rock, giving Snow the unlikely pin.

Rating: D+. Considering this was a bullrope match and they were only attached for about 3 minutes, there wasn’t much in the way of the gimmick. I’m assuming the Outlaws came out because Rock is on HHH’s hit list but it’s not really clear. This wasn’t a horrible match but it was pretty overdone considering what they had to work with. The rope didn’t need to be a part of this at all.

The Posse spills stuff on Stephanie and HHH so they get a match tonight against two members of Too Cool.

Post break Tori comes in and yells about something so HHH gives Kane, Tori’s boyfriend, a world title match tonight. If he loses though, Tori has to spend the holidays with X-Pac, Kane’s current foe.

Too Cool/Rikishi vs. Mean Street Posse

For no apparent reason this is now a six man. Too Cool cleans house to start before we get down to Scotty vs. Pete (Pete Gas, Rodney and Joey Abs comprise the Posse). Some nefarious maneuvers get Scotty down, including a belly to back suplex. That gets two and it’s all downhill for the Posse from here. There’s the hot tag to Rikishi, right hand, Samoan Drop, Banzai Drop to Joey and we’re done. This was nothing.

It’s time to dance.

HHH and Stephanie talk about the main event.

WWF World Title: Kane vs. Big Show

Show is defending in case that wasn’t clear. This was when Show still had long hair and was relatively slim. HHH comes out to watch again. Kane fires away to start and hits a boot to the face. The champion comes back with a Russian legsweep for two. Stephanie is sitting on HHH’s lap in a recliner on the stage. Kane’s boot to the ribs is caught but he hits an enziguri to the face to send Show to the floor. A big clothesline off the top takes Show down but he picks Kane up and drops him on the barricade. That’s scary strength.

Show hits Kane in the back with a chair for a DQ but HHH says keep things going because it’s no DQ. Show loads up a chokeslam so Kane kicks him in the balls to escape. Kane gets thrown into the crowd for a countout but if you’re paying attention, you know what Stephanie says. HHH makes it falls count anywhere too. Kane gets launched into the barricade but comes back with a backdrop over the barricade and back to ringside for two.

They slug it out again and Show hits a belly to back suplex for a delayed two. Another slug out results in Kane being sent into the steps. Show picks up the steps but Kane dropkicks them back into Show’s face. Cue the Outlaws as Kane picks Show up for a slam, only to have to chase the Outlaws away from Tori. Show powerbombs Kane through the announce table to retain the title.

Rating: B. That’s probably high but this is by far and away the best Big Show vs. Kane match I’ve ever seen. Apparently the formula for these two to have a good wrestling match is to take the wrestling out. Battles of the giants are more fun when you have the two of them beating each other all over the place and having them break a lot of stuff. For a TV main event, this was very fun.

HHH and Stephanie gloat to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was around the time that the Attitude Era was starting to slow down a lot after 1999 was the high point of the insanity. You could see HHH vs. Rock on the horizon as the feud that sent this company to levels no one believed were possible, along with other big stars ready to go. The Radicalz would arrive in about a month for a bunch of new blood and things couldn’t be much better. This show though was going too fast for its own good but you could tell they were clearly trying which is more than you get a lot of the time anymore. Good show.

If you’re interested, I’ve done the Raw from the next week as well:

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