ECW on Sci-Fi – October 10, 2006: Naked Women Are Annoying

ECW on Sci-Fi
Date: October 10, 2006
Location: Kansas Coliseum, Topeka, Kansas
Commentators: Joey Styles, Tazz

We’re past No Mercy and ECW had no involvement with it at all. We’re heading up to Cyber Sunday now where the ECW Champion would have a match but he wouldn’t defend his title. Tonight the main event is a six man tag with the major names on the show fighting the other major names. Things won’t really change around here for about two more months so we’re going to be in the same place for awhile. Oh and there’s Extreme Strip Poker tonight. Let’s get to it.

Balls Mahoney is the dealer for the poker game. We have Trinity, Kelly, Maria, Candice, Ashley and Krystal. Oh and it’s lowest card loses, not even poker. Ashley loses the first one and takes her shirt off. This is going to be a LONG show.

Theme song.

The announced main event is a six man tag, meaning I was looking at the wrong card earlier.

CM Punk vs. Rene Dupree

Punk dropkicks Dupree in the thigh to start and we cut to Kelly taking her shoes off. Dupress gets kicked in the face and pounded into the corner followed by a nearly botched backdrop. Punk heads to the apron and gets elbowed in the face as we head to the chinlock from Rene. Trinity loses her top. The guys in the ring slug it out and Punk blocks an O’Connor roll. Punk takes over and hits the knee/bulldog combo for two. There’s a powerslam for Punk and he floats over into the Anaconda Vice for the submission.

Rating: C-. This was a squash and one with a bunch of annoying distractions. They’re a waste of time as while the girls do look good, you’re never going to see anything, so it’s a constant set of teases without any actual payoff. Also at least do the segments between the matches instead of cutting back to showing a girl taking off her freaking shoes. Hopefully Dupree leaves soon as the guy is just a waste of space.

Candice and Maria tie so they both take something off. Maria takes off her garters and Candice takes off her skirt.

After a break, it’s Dealer’s Choice, meaning Balls gets to pick the article the loser has to take off. Krystal has to take her skirt off. Ok the thong is a nice touch.

Kevin Thorn vs. Tommy Dreamer

Dreamer pounds him into the corner to start but a charge sends his shoulder into the post. Ashley takes her shoes off and Thorn cranks on Dreamer’s arm. Candice loses her corset and dances a bit. Thorn misses a headbutt and Dreamer fires off right hands. A suplex puts Thorn down as does a Sky High powerbomb. Dreamer has to go after Ariel on the floor and Thorn gets in a shot to the back. Tommy tries an elbow drop but crashes, letting Thorn hit a sitout Rock Bottom for two. Dreamer hits a reverse guillotine across the top rope and the DDT pins Thorn for the first time in ECW.

Rating: D+. Why would you have Dreamer win here? Thorn was one of the hot young heels they had on this show and they have him lose to the ultimate ECW jobber? Other than that there wasn’t anything here as it didn’t even last four minutes, so it’s not like they could get anywhere with it. Also, it’s Tommy Dreamer vs. Kevin Thorn. What are you expecting from it?

Krystal loses her shoes and Balls has an erection.

We recap Hardcore Holly getting his back sliced open and then getting taken out by Test before Holly could kill Heyman.

The girls talk about how hot Cena is. This transitions into a promo for the Marine. Maria loves ponies. END THIS FREAKING NONSENSE ALREADY!!! Now they like Batista and Punk. They deal another round and Kelly dances before taking her skirt off. She takes her top off because she wants to. The bra comes off and we take a break with her back to the camera.


Rob Van Dam/Sabu/Sandman vs. Test/Matt Striker/Big Show

During the entrances, Ashley loses her skirt and Krystal loses her top. Van Dam and Test get us going with Test pounding Van Dam down into the corner. Rob comes out of the corner with a spinning crossbody for two and it’s a standoff. The step over kick takes Test down and there’s Rolling Thunder at the same time Sabu hits a slingshot legdrop. Sabu adds a springboard leg lariat and it’s off to Sandy.

Striker does the coward heel thing of getting in his shots while Sandman is in trouble. Maria takes her skirt off. Sandman wants Big Show with the big man chopping away as Trinity takes her skirt off. Sabu comes in to fire away on Show but Test pops him in the back to take over. This match is going nowhere. Sabu pounds on Test and we take a break.

Back with Test hitting some backbreakers on Sabu for two. Striker comes in and pokes Sabu in the eyes before hitting a neckbreaker for two. Off to a chinlock to make sure this match doesn’t get interesting at all. Back to Big Show with a chokebomb as Sabu is reeling. Show does the RVD finger point and runs over Sabu again. Maria loses her corset. This would be more appealing if she hadn’t been in Playboy.

Sabu counters a chokeslam into a DDT for two and it’s off to Test. Off to a bearhug followed by Striker coming in and getting punched in the face. There’s a hot tag to Van Dam and the fans really aren’t that interested at this point. Van Dam’s top rope kick takes Striker down and a superkick does the same to Test. Air Sabu hits test in the corner and everything breaks down. The Five Star hits Striker but Sandman gets to come in and beat up Striker for the pin.

Rating: D. This match was terribly boring. It was almost like the match was here to fill in time before we got to the rest of the card stuff. The feuds being combined was a fine idea, but other than that there’s nothing to see here. Sandman pinning Striker doesn’t mean anything and Van Dam and Big Show had all of four seconds of action. Nothing to see here.

Candice claims the game is rigged and gets in an argument with Maria. Tops come off, everything is blurred, you can see the straps of the skin colored underwear, a big catfight ends the show.

Overall Rating: F+. I hated this show. I get it: this was to tease 13 year olds, but that doesn’t make it any less dull. This was from 2006, a year where the internet and access to naked women was certainly in full swing. Yeah the girls look good here, but when they keep cutting into the matches for the “poker”, it gets really old really fast. Nothing to see here and I can’t stand shows like this one.

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