Impact Wrestling – November 14, 2013: They’re Alive But In Name Only

Impact Wrestling
Date: November 14, 2013
Location: Cincinnati Gardens, Cincinnati, Ohio
Commentators: Mike Tenay, Tazz

It’s the final show on the road before they head back to Orlando which seems to be the best idea they could have at the moment. We’re also a week away from the next Clash of the Champions style show called Turning Point which will likely be a lot of tournament matches and a few other things thrown in on the side. Tonight’s main event is Angle vs. Aries in a submission match which isn’t the most interesting match in the world. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of Dixie announcing the tournament and Hardy vs. Sabin in the first match last week.

Here are Aces and 8’s to open the show with Brooke shaking her hips and Ray laughing at Tenay for falling for the ruse last week. Ray asks if the fans know who he is and says this club is about quality. He doesn’t need to be world champion to be the most talked about guy in TNA because everyone knows he’s the be all and end all. Ray accepts the challenge for a match with Anderson at Turning Point but promises to piledrive him through the stage next week.

This brings out Anderson who says that everyone here in Cincinnati is sick and tired of the Aces and 8’s. Therefore, how about if he beats Ray next week, Aces and 8’s are done in TNA, never to ride again? Ray doesn’t see the appeal so he turns it down, so Anderson sweetens the pot: if he loses, he’s gone for good. That’s cool with him too, because his wife is pregnant with twins.

Ray is all cool with that but thinks Anderson is crazy for agreeing to this match. Anderson says that’s right and goes after Ray, only to be beaten down by Knux and Bischoff. Ray gets a chair but Anderson kicks him away and cleans house. Anderson says he’s feeling frisky and wants one of the bikers right now. It looks like it’ll be Knux after the break.

Mr. Anderson vs. Knux

Anderson, in street clothes, pounds away in the corner to start and scores with some right hands. Knux comes back with a cross body for two and they head outside. Anderson is whipped into the steps and apron before Knux suplexes him back inside. Anderson can’t slam him down and gets splashed in the corner. A side slam gets two for Knux but after more slow pounding, Anderson grabs the Mic Check out of nowhere for the pin at 4:50.

Rating: D+. Just a basic warmup match before next week and there’s nothing wrong with that. The match showed how basic Knux is though and that’s the problem with Aces and 8’s. Other than Bully, there hasn’t been anyone not named Anderson worth anything at all. The team has needed to go away for months now and hopefully that happens next week.

We get an Impact365 video from Joseph Park, challenging Daniels to a singles match tonight.

Daniels accepts the challenge in another video where he talks about the medical benefits of appletinis with Kazarian. Daniels runs into Roode walking down the hall and t-shirts are schilled.

Video on Aries vs. Angle for later tonight, focusing on Aries’ submission skills.

Christopher Daniels vs. Joseph Park

Park scores with a quick hiptoss and a right hand to put Daniels down. He doesn’t fall for a Daniels’ handshake and pulls him into a clothesline before Christopher scores with some right hands and a half nelson rollup for two. Park misses an Earthquake splash and Daniels hooks a chinlock. Joseph fights up with a Samoan drop and a side slam for two more. Daniels rolls away before Park can try a middle rope splash but a running splash in the corner connects instead. The referee yells so Daniels kicks Park low for the pin at 5:24.

Rating: D. Well, this happened. There really isn’t much else to say about it either and that’s not a good sign. It’s also very indicative of a major TNA problem: so much of their stuff feels like filler, but we never get to the shows that we’re supposed to be filling time until. In theory it’s Turning Point or Genesis, but Turning Point is mainly tournament matches which is just filler until we get to the winner of the tournament vs. AJ. That’s not good when it feels like everything is just filler until BFG time. In case you couldn’t tell, there wasn’t much to this match.

Ray promises to beat Anderson next week.

Norv Fernum/Dewey Barnes vs. Ethan Carter III

Carter is now 7-0 after winning on some house shows this weekend. The jobbers work on the arm to start until Carter takes Barnes’ head off with a clothesline out of the corner. A snap suplex sets up a belly to back suplex on Dewey before the tag is off to Fernum for some top rope dropkicks. Norv gets two off a tornado DDT but Carter hits 1 Percenters on both guys for the double pin at 3:29.

Rating: D+. Carter is still working for me as a character but they need to do more for him soon before he gets boring. I still think he winds up in the title scene sooner rather than later and shockingly enough, that doesn’t sound too bad. He’s definitely playing the character well but he needs a few decent wins for credibility.

We see another AJ in Mexico video, with Styles saying he’s an awesome wrestler.

Dixie freaks out on the production team for letting that video air.

Jeff Hardy talks about his injuries in the match last week but saying it’s just step one to winning the title.

Here’s Dixie to proclaim how great she is. Sometimes it feels great to say how amazing you are, such as when she kicked AJ off the show and raised the quality of the show. It also proves her point that no one is irreplaceable. AJ left in her car with her title but in a few weeks we’ll have a new champion to replace Styles. Dixie talks about the tournament being all gimmicky and calls out the four people in the matches next week: Bobby Roode, James Storm, Magnus and Samoa Joe.

She spun the Wheel of Dixie earlier and it’s Roode vs. Storm in a bullrope match, with Dixie picking Roode to win. Dixie talks about Storm not doing anything for her lately, so Storm talks about being a cowboy and says his catchphrase. On the other hand, Joe vs. Magnus is going to be falls count anywhere. Joe says the only reason this tournament is going on is to cover for her inability to sign AJ to a new deal. Once he runs through the tournament, AJ gets the first title shot whether it’s here or anywhere else in the world. Magnus cuts Joe off and says he’ll win, but Dixie says this is all about finding her one true champion. Nice segment.

Anderson beats up Bischoff in the back and handcuffs him to a metal cart.

Video on Angle’s submission skills.

Gail Kim vs. Hannah Blossom

This is the Gail Kim open challenge to anyone from outside of the company. If Hannah wins, she gets a title shot down the line. Gail kicks her in the head to start and rams Hannah into a buckle. More kicks put Blossom down and there’s the Figure Four around the post for good measure. Hannah makes the jobber comeback but misses a charge and Eats Defeat for the pin at 3:28.

Rating: D. Nothing to see here as usual with Kim. She’s decent in the ring but I just do not care about her at all and haven’t in years. It’s another case of something we’ve seen so many times that there’s no reason to get interested in it at all. At least we’re getting some fresh Knockouts for the time being though.

Joseph Park comes out again and talks about how he doesn’t know where Abyss is. All he knows is that Abyss is a future TNA Hall of Famer and issues an open challenge to Abyss for next week. That should be interesting.

Anderson carries Bischoff away on his shoulders.

TNA World Title Tournament First Round: Kurt Angle vs. Austin Aries

Submission match. Feeling out process to start with Angle taking it to the mat and putting on a headscissors. Aries rolls out of the ankle lock but Kurt bails to the floor to avoid the Last Chancery. Back in and Aries grabs a quick STF but Angle is in the ropes even faster. Angle comes back with a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker but Roode comes out with a chair to watch from the stage. Kurt gets distracted, allowing Aries to dive off the top, only to be caught in a belly to belly. Aries dropkicks him to the floor and we take a break.

Back with Aries in control and going after the neck, only to wake Angle up in the process. Angle rolls some Germans but Aries armdrags Angle out to the floor. A big top rope ax handle to the floor puts Kurt down again but Aries hurts his ankle in the process. Aries comes back in with a missile dropkick but Angle grabs the ankle lock in midair to take over.

Aries counters by rolling Angle into the corner but Angle catches the running dropkick in another ankle lock. Austin rolls through again to send Angle outside but it’s quickly back inside so Aries can hit the missile dropkick. The corner dropkick sets up the brainbuster and the Last Chancery but of course Angle doesn’t tap.

Aries lets go of the hold and Angle snaps off another suplex, only to have Aries get up top. He throws Angle off to block a running suplex but Aries’ 450 only hits mat and hurts the ankle again. The Angle Slam is countered twice but Aries misses a charge into the post and Angle Crossfaces him for the win at 16:45.

Rating: B-. I liked the match but it felt like it was just waiting until we got to the inevitable. That’s a major problem for so much of TNA’s stuff anymore as you can call most of what they’re going to do anymore. Aries was trying but it was a lot of the same stuff we always see from him. Still way better than anything else tonight though.

Anderson drags Bischoff out to piledrive him on the stage to end the show.

Overall Rating: C-. The show wasn’t bad tonight but it’s clear that they’ve only got two stories at the moment. Luckily for them the stories aren’t bad, but that’s going to catch up to them in the long run, as it always does. The matches were rather bad for the most part though with mainly a night of squashes to set up the big show next week. The main event helped but Angle winning was somewhat obvious. Again, the show has no soul though and it’s showing more and more every week.


Mr. Anderson b. Knux – Mic Check

Christopher Daniels b. Joseph Park – Low blow

Ethan Carter III b. Norv Fernum/Dewey Barnes – Double pin after 1 Perfecters to both men

Gail Kim b. Hannah Blossom – Eat Defeat

Kurt Angle b. Austin Aries – Crossface


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  1. dmxfury says:

    The Gardens? Yikes, just played hockey there Monday (no I’m not in any sort of professional league)

  2. Jay H. (the real one) says:

    Is it bad that every Match in the Tournament has been a Gimmick? Remember when TNA said Wrestling Matters.