Impact Wrestling – August 25, 2016: Bound For Bad Wrestling

Impact Wrestling
Date: August 25, 2016
Location: Impact Zone, Orlando, Florida
Commentators: Josh Matthews, D’Angelo Dinero

We’re down to six weeks before Bound For Glory and you can start to see some of the card taking shape. Tonight’s main event has World Title implications as we have Ethan Carter III vs. Drew Galloway for the #1 contendership with Aron Rex as the guest referee. It should also be interesting to see where they go with the midcard titles. Let’s get to it.

Ethan Carter III and Drew Galloway meet on the roof of a very tall building with a pool nearby. They sit down for some whiskey and a chat which we’ll probably see later.

We recap Ethan maybe or maybe not causing Drew several World Title matches.

Battle Royal

Robbie E., Jesse Godderz, Eli Drake, Basille Baraka, Baron Dax, Grado, Mahabali Shera, Mike Bennett, Moose, Eddie Edwards

Winner gets a World Title shot and Lashley is on commentary. There are only ten people in an open invitation battle royal for a World Title shot? Josh says this show is being called a turning point. Wait is this Turning Point 2016? Or is that just Josh running his mouth like the goon that he is?

Baraka eliminates Dax to get us down to nine and to make me happy that I don’t have to remember which of those two is which. Moose dumps Shera and we take a break. Back with all eight still in before Baraka gets rid of Robbie. Moose tosses Baraka a few seconds later, followed by Eli getting rid of Grado. Lashley keeps talking about how everyone can just leave now because they’re not winning the title shot. At least he’s sounding cocky like a monster heel should.

Eddie throws Drake out and we’re down to four. Jesse springboards back in to clothesline both heels but Moose tosses him out with ease. So it’s Eddie, Moose and Bennett to go and the double teaming begins, only to have Eddie grab Moose in a hurricanrana but Mike dumps them both out for the win at 17:10.

Rating: D. Well that happened. Bennett was one of the only options to win here and that’s the problem with having ten people in a battle royal. Shouldn’t most of the roster be in this if it’s for a shot at the World Title? Where are all the X-Division guys who were talking about how they wanted to fight Lashley? Matt and Jeff aren’t interested in being World Champion? That’s not the best thinking and it made for a bad battle royal with everyone waiting to get down to the three or so potential winners.

Ethan and Drew down their first whiskey and Ethan asks what they’re talking about. Isn’t that clear based on all of Drew’s talking of late?

After a break, Moose yells at Bennett as Maria tells the camera to get out of here.

Here’s Matt Hardy with the contract for the Tag Team Title shot. The titles are decaying and must be saved by his brilliance. This brings out Jeff who sings/speaks the lyrics to his obsolete theme. Matt isn’t sure why Jeff is here so Jeff mentions wrestling for the creatures. Now it’s Rosemary coming out to say they have the titles and won’t be giving them up. Abyss says the destruction of the Hardys will be beautiful and Crazzy Steve shows up to say about the same. Matt promises revenge for Decay stealing Maxill in his vision and vows to eat all of them. Jeff can fight any of them right now and Abyss volunteers.

Jeff Hardy vs. Abyss

After the break six seconds into the match, we come back to see Abyss in control and Matt telling Jeff to delete him. Instead of taking Abyss to field and something about a Spanish speaking gardener, Jeff forearms him in the head and drops the leg between the legs for two. A Twist of Fate looks to set up the Swanton but Matt says he has to stop being a spot monkey.

Jeff flips Matt off and dives onto Steve, who doesn’t really catch him. Steve comes in and gets clotheslined right back to the floor, allowing Jeff to kick Abyss low and hit him with a chain for two. Abyss better win after that near fall. There’s the chokeslam but Steve mists Abyss by mistake, setting up another Twist of Fate for another two. Matt bites Steve for being in his premonition as the Black Hole Slam puts Jeff away at 11:09.

Rating: D+. Totally overbooked here and the two false finishes were at least one too many. In addition to that (And the stupid break six seconds in. Just come back for the opening bell.), this Matt stuff is annoying. I get that he’s supposed to be all crazy and broken or whatever, but it’s gone so far away from the original idea that it’s just Matt being annoying now instead of being funny or interesting.

Post match Matt says the Decay’s deletion is soon. Jeff, a grasshopper, has many things to learn.

Maria yells at Allie for not knowing that Sienna has a title match as ordered by Billy Corgan. Billy comes in and implies there’s more than one opponent.

Lashley comes up to Mike Bennett, who says he won’t be intimidated. Bennett says Lashley is looking forward to Bound For Glory but needs to be worried about next week.

Knockouts Title: Sienna vs. Marti Bell vs. Madison Rayne vs. Allie vs. Jade

Sienna is defending and Allie tries to help her friend out early on, much to Sienna’s annoyance. Jade and Marti are sent outside as Maria comes out. Marti gets back in and gets stomped down with a stunned look whenever Allie tries something. Maria keeps Madison from getting back in as Sienna yells at Allie for trying to help. Allie actually gets in some offense on Marti before we hit a quick finisher parade. A package piledriver knocks Madison out but Allie accidentally hits Sienna with Marti’s baton. Marti hits Allie with it as well, knocking her right onto Sienna for the pin and the title at 4:28.

Rating: D. Why do I have a feeling that this is a way to get the title on Maria so Gail can take it away from her at Bound For Glory? I only ask because that would be one of the least interesting things they can do and would manage to make four straight Knockouts Champions that mean nothing other than a way to get the title back on Gail. Jade was ignored for Gail, Sienna barely defended the thing and Allie isn’t a wrestler. But you know who is? Gail Kim!

The fans chant for Allie.

Aron Rex guarantees that someone will be bound for glory tonight.

Tyrus is a fixer.

Back on the rooftop, Ethan asks Drew why he’s angry. Drew says it’s because Ethan interfered when Drew specifically asked him not to. Ethan thinks that’s on Drew for just not winning so Drew says he’ll hit extra hard next time. They drink a final toast and shake hands but Drew shoves him into the pool.

Moose is leaving when he runs into Lashley driving away. Lashley suggests that Bennett is pulling his strings and tells him where he’ll be having dinner tonight. Moose nods as Lashley drives away.

It’s time for Fact of Life with the X-Division guys as guests. Drake says whoever thought of that battle royal was a dummy but gets to the question of who has no chance to become the next X-Division Champion. Spud says Sutter won’t be it because he’s just a good story. Sutter points out Spud’s braces so Spud goes on a rant against Mandrews for being short, British and having bad hair. DJZ says he’s going to beat Lashley at some point but Drake cuts him off to hit the dummy button a lot. A brawl breaks out and a string of dives leaves DJZ as the only one standing.

So to recap: Lashley destroyed the X-Division Champion then beat DJZ in the match DJZ wanted. Now there’s going to be a big mess of a match (Ultimate X I’d assume) for the title where one of these goons will come out as champion. Lashley doesn’t lose the title, the new champion will be the best of a bunch of losers with no character, and they probably won’t even have to get a pin to become champion. And people wonder why the X-Division is worthless.

The X-Division Title will be decided in an Ultimate X gauntlet match. So just Ultimate X match after Ultimate X match? Or people being added one at a time and the first person to pull down the title wins? Either way, no pinning involved because that might imply someone gets over the others.

Drew Galloway vs. Ethan Carter III

The winner gets the title shot at Lashley and Aron Rex is guest referee. Feeling out process to start with both guys shoving the other away. A double collision puts them both down and we take a break. Back with Drew being knocked to the floor but stopping a dive with a forearm. A Celtic Cross onto the steps makes things worse for Carter and it’s off to a cravate.

Rex hasn’t been a factor so far, making me think that either he turns on someone or one of the guys (probably Drew) turns on him after counting a clean fall. Ethan gets in a Russian legsweep to send Galloway into the buckle and gets two off a powerbomb out of the corner. Drew gets in a Claymore and a powerbomb of his own for two before they chop it out.

The 1%er is broken up and another Claymore gets two more near falls for Drew. Still nothing from Rex. Carter ramps it up with a super 1%er for two but Galloway muscles him up for a Tombstone. Back up and the Futureshock is countered into a jackknife cover to give Carter the pin at 17:26.

Rating: B-. Nothing spectacular here but the ending was clean, as it should be to send someone to the pay per view main event. Galloway’s fall is an interesting story and sets him up as a potentially big time heel down the line. Carter going to the World Title match makes sense and should make for a good main event but it’s nothing we haven’t seen before.

Post match Drew beats Rex down and sends him into the steps for a heel turn.

Overall Rating: C-. The wrestling mostly sucked tonight and while this certainly didn’t need to be a “special” (which they only referred to it as once or twice with no special graphics etc.), it did feel like they were starting the build towards Bound For Glory. Unfortunately that means it’s a very hit and miss card as TNA’s creative isn’t the strongest at the moment. It’s a watchable show but this was much more about the future than anything on the card tonight.

Results

Mike Bennett won a battle royal last eliminating Moose and Eddie Edwards

Abyss b. Jeff Hardy – Black Hole Slam

Allie b. Sienna, Marti Bell, Madison Rayne and Jade – Allie fell on Rayne

Ethan Carter III b. Drew Galloway – Jackknife cover

 

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1 comment

  1. Jay H (the real one) says:

    This was the first Impact in a several weeks where ive watched from start to finish. Was it me or did Josh Matthews sound like he was asleep for most of it? He just sounded so uninterested,he and Pope are just awful. I too am over the whole Broken Matt Hardy stuff now, it was funny the first few weeks but now it’s jumped the shark. Oh and yay another multi-person X-Division Title Match to make us think they care about the Belt again.