Smackdown – October 19, 2012: This Show Is Broken

Smackdown
Date: October 19, 2012
Location: FedEx Forum, Memphis, Tennessee
Commentators: Josh Matthews, John Bradshaw Layfield

Back to the blue show after things have taken a fresh turn on Raw. We’re closing in on the Cell where apparently Show vs. Sheamus isn’t in the Cell, likely leaving them open for a rematch next month. I’m enjoying this story way better than I likely should but having a clash of two titans like this is always fun. Hopefully things pick up a bit on here. Let’s get to it.

Do You Know Your Enemy? Mine is a barn that my uncle fell off yesterday.

Here’s the now non-Intercontinental Champion Miz for MizTV. He has a NASTY looking gash above his eye from where Kofi kicked him on Monday. He’s cashing in his rematch clause and he’ll prove why he’s must see. No date is given but presumably it’s at the PPV. His guests tonight are HELL NO. Yeah the match is officially at the PPV. Miz says if they were a real tag team, they would come out together. Bryan offers to separate Miz’s teeth from his mouth. Miz makes fun of the Goat Face and says the lack of continuity is going to cost them the championships.

Kane says that he’s won tag titles with giants, psychopaths with multiple personalities and a dead man so Bryan is no problem. Bryan says that he’s the reason they’ll keep the titles because he’s the world’s toughest vegan. Kane says that’s like being the world’s tallest dwarf, but Bryan has that covered too. Miz: “Can I say something here?” Kane and Bryan: “NO!”

The champions argue again with Bryan mentioning the MITB cash in over Big Show, drawing out the big man for a rebuttal. Show says he has no issue with Kane (even though they’re fighting on Monday) but he has one with Bryan. He doesn’t want to hear about Bryan beating him in 45 seconds again or he’s going to knock Bryan out. He says he’ll knock Bryan out now but Kane gets in Show’s way, saying they don’t have to wait for Monday. This brings out….Dolph Ziggler?

Ziggler talks about how talking about Bryan and MITB is so last year and he should be the focus because he’s cashing in on either Sheamus or Big Show. Ziggler says if Bryan can do it to Big Show, how hard can it be? An argument breaks out and Booker comes out but Miz says that Booker can save his time because he knows what’s coming. Instead Booker makes HELL NO vs. Show/Ziggler and Miz vs. a surprise. When they have this huge tag division all of a sudden, do we need to have these one night only tag teams to fight them? Here’s Miz’s surprise.

The Miz vs. Randy Orton

Orton is looking a bit more like he did in 2004. I think it’s the not being orange and having a bit more hair. This is joined in progress after a break with Randy clotheslining Miz down and stomping away. Del Rio and Ricardo are watching from a sky box. Miz pounds away in the corner but Orton comes right back and pounds away as well. A belly to back suplex gets two for Orton but Miz comes back and knocks Randy off the apron and into the barricade as we take a break.

Back with Orton in a chinlock which Miz follows up with a Reality Check for two. Striker is in the sky box to talk to Ricardo and Alberto. For all we know, right now Miz and Orton are doing the Charleston. Del Rio says he’s the new Apex Predator in the WWE and that’s about it. Back in the ring Miz hits the corner clothesline but Orton crotches him on the top. Orton superplexes Miz down for two and a clothesline puts Miz on the floor.

Back in and Orton glares at Del Rio before dropkicking Miz down for two. Miz comes back with the short DDT for two of his own. Orton comes back with a quick elevated DDT before going insane and loading up the RKO. Miz avoids it and tries the Finale but Orton rolls away and hits the RKO for the pin at 7:30 shown of 11:00.

Rating: C. Well at least Miz isn’t a champion anymore. The match wasn’t anything great but these two have never had the best chemistry. Miz seems to be the latest victim of of writers being bored syndrome as he came back, got a quick push, and then the push just stopped for the sake of someone else getting a push. It’s stuff like that which causes no one to be over or credible anymore.

Del Rio says they’re going to do this on his terms at HIAC.

Sheamus runs into Teddy in the back and the champ wants Barrett tonight. Teddy says he’ll talk to Booker about it and he’ll try to make it a lumberjack match. Sheamus: “I feel you playa.” Eve is lurking in the background.

Rhodes Scholars vs. Tyson Kidd/Justin Gabriel

Gabriel and Cody start but it’s off to Tyson very fast with a kick to the back for two. Cody and Sandow head to the floor with Gabriel taking Damien out with a dive. Cody gets in a cheap shot and we head back into the ring for some heel beating. Sandow takes him down and drops the windup elbow for two. Gabriel gets in a kick to the face to take Rhodes down and it’s off to Kidd. He cleans a few rooms of the house with a dropkick to the side of Sandow’s head but as he puts Damien in the Sharpshooter, Cody gets a blind tag and hits the Disaster Kick for the pin at 3:20.

Rating: C-. Nothing much to see here as it’s just another Rhodes Scholars squash to set up the tournament final on Raw. This was a squash but it was nothing interesting. Also, we have another case of the back and forth booking as Kidd and Gabriel had good competitive matches with Cesaro but here’s they’re jobbers for a tag team. Either push the guys as good, tough opponents or make them full on jobbers.

Eve is sucking up to Booker in the back when Teddy comes in to pitch the lumberjack match idea to Booker. Eve says she’s been talking about that for weeks and Teddy stole his idea. Since apparently Booker doesn’t watch the show and no one with a brain in wrestling ever WATCHES THE TAPE FROM EARLIER WHICH THEY KNOW EXISTS BECAUSE THERE WAS A CAMERA RIGHT THERE, Teddy has no defense. Instead he looks at an iPad after the other two leave.

HELL NO vs. Dolph Ziggler/Big Show

No entrances for either team. Bryan and Ziggler start things off with Bryan being taken to the mat in a bit of a surprise. A dropkick puts Daniel down and it’s off to Big Show. The other monster gets the tag and they slug it out with Show spearing Kane down. Show pounds away in the corner but misses a charge, allowing Kane to bring in Bryan for the NO kicks. The big kick to the head is blocked though and Show gorilla presses Bryan to the floor.

We take a break and come back with Ziggler ramming Bryan’s face into Show’s boot for one. Off to Show but Bryan avoids the chop in the corner. He tries to dive for Kane but Show easily throws him down. The chokeslam is countered into the DDT but Ziggler breaks up another tag with a neckbreaker on Bryan. Ziggler drops a bunch of elbows including a jumping version which gets two. Back to Show who punches Bryan in the ribs and puts on a stomach claw.

Off to Ziggler but he misses a Stinger Splash in the corner and there’s the hot tag to Kane. The Fameasser misses Kane but a big boot gets two on Ziggler. Bryan tags himself in of course, and hits a running clothesline on Dolph, followed by a running dropkick in the corner. Bryan dives at Big Show and gets shoved down as everything breaks down. Kane takes Show down and the NO Lock submits Ziggler at 10:02 shown of 13:32.

Rating: C. Dolph tapping out was the only way they could go here. I mean, he didn’t get beaten on Monday and by law he absolutely must job once a week so that his cash in will be as shocking as possible, and by shocking I mean really freaking obvious. Also I could go without having these random teams facing HELL NO every week.

The champs argue on the stage when Rhodes Scholars jump them. They’re not even pretending that the tournament is up for grabs anymore.

We recap the end of Barrett vs. Sheamus from Raw.

Antonio Cesaro vs. Ted DiBiase

Before the match we get a vignette of Cesaro at Sun Studio (where Elvis recorded a lot of his stuff) and criticizing country music. These kind of things are way better than seeing the people in the back all the time. Ted starts with a dropkick but gets sent to the floor almost immediately. Antonio drops Ted face first on the apron and we’re entering squash mode. Cesaro hits the gutwrench suplex and puts on a cravate. DiBiase makes a quick comeback with a clothesline and sitout spinebuster, but he jumps into the uppercut to stop him cold. There’s the Neutralizer for the pin at 2:39.

Raw ReBound is about the end of the show with the contract signing and Ryback killing Punk.

Heath Slater vs. Brodus Clay

The Band continues to look hilariously stupid. Slater jumps Brodus in the corner to start but the big man will have none of that. A suplex puts Slater down but Brodus charges into a boot in the corner. A middle rope missile dropkick staggers Clay but Slater gets killed by the overhead suplex. Clay has to chase off the Band and Slater hits that falling cutter of his for the pin at 1:55. It was nice looking at your girls Brodus. Sorry you had to die this badly.

Barrett isn’t sure Sheamus is a tough guy but he’s certainly stupid. Why fight Barrett tonight when you have to defend against Big Show? Wade hopes that Show remembers the beatdown tonight and wants the favor repaid once Show wins the title.

Layla vs. Natalya

They head to the mat and then the floor almost immediately with Nattie taking over. Eve continues to talk about the attack on Kaitlyn because that’s still a thing for some reason. Natalya hooks a modified abdominal stretch which is quickly escapes and a kick to the face gets Layla the pin at 1:55. It’s really hard to take Layla seriously when her song is about not being able to get enough sex and her video is of her dancing.

Teddy is with Kaitlyn and the iPad apparently belongs to Eve. Apparently there’s information on there that proves Eve is evil and needs to be stopped. Gee, who would have seen that coming? Kaitlyn takes a picture of the iPad screen. She says keep this quiet for now. You know, BECAUSE DOING THIS IN FRONT OF A CAMERA ON NATIONAL TELEVISION IS GOING TO KEEP THIS A SECRET!

Here are the lumberjacks for the main event.

Wade Barrett vs. Sheamus

Non-title of course and Show is a lumberjack. Barrett pounds away in the corner but the champion slugs right back. Barrett comes back with a kick to the ribs and a pumphandle slam for two. Sheamus gets sat on the ropes for the big boot, knocking the champion to the outside. Back in that gets two as Big Show is just standing there watching. Sheamus is sent chest first into the buckle as the dominance continues. Matthews says it’s a stalemate. I’d hate to see a beating then.

We take a break and come back with Sheamus making a comeback and hitting a Regal Roll for no cover. There are the ten forearms in the ropes followed by White Noise. Sheamus loads up the Brogue Kick but the 3MB pulls Barret to the floor. The champ dives on all of them to take them out but Barrett hits a running back elbow and a big boot for two back inside.

Wasteland is escaped and the Brogue Kick misses too. Barrett clotheslines Sheamus to the floor and it’s time for the big lumberjack brawl. Back in and Wade charges into the Irish Curse….and here’s HELL NO to get the Rhodes Scholars. Brogue Kick ends Barrett at 7:24 shown of 10:54.

Rating: C+. I usually love the brawls these two have but this was the short and not that great version. The focus was on the lumberjacks and while Sheamus got beaten up, it never felt like he was in any real danger. That made the main event more about waiting for the ending rather than being an interesting match. That’s not good but the match still wasn’t bad.

Post match Ziggler knocks Sheamus down and tries to cash in but Big Show knocks Ziggler out cold with the punch. Show says he’s taking the title at the PPV.

Overall Rating: D+. This show didn’t do anything for me. Aside from how uninteresting the Eve stuff is, now it’s just getting stupid as they have the evidence they need to prove she’s lying on tape and they won’t use it, and then they do something in front of a camera and say keep this secret. On top of that, the tournament final on Monday looks like a waste of time given what we saw here. Smackdown is just worthless at this point and I don’t see that changing anytime soon.

Results

Randy Orton b. The Miz – RKO

Rhodes Scholars b. Tyson Kidd/Justin Gabriel – Disaster Kick to Kidd

HELL NO b. Dolph Ziggler/Big Show – NO Lock to Ziggler

Antonio Cesaro b. Ted DiBiase – Neutralizer

Heath Slater b. Brodus Clay – Falling Cutter

Layla b. Natalya – Kick to the head

Sheamus b. Wade Barrett – Brogue Kick

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