Lucha Underground – January 28, 2015: Faster Than Your Local Luchador

Lucha Underground
Date: January 28, 2015
Location: Lucha Underground Arena, Los Angeles, California
Commentators: Vampiro, Matt Striker

This is becoming a more interesting show by the week as there are things changing, even though it seems like it’s staying the same. Cueto now has his hired goons and gets to be Vince with a Spanish accent. Other than that we have Prince Puma having to fight off Cage, meaning we might be hearing from the champ tonight. Let’s get to it.

We open with a recap of the Crew turning on Ryck and joining Cueto last week.

Quick recap of Cage attacking Puma a few weeks back.

Cage is lifting weights in the back when Cueto comes up to praise him a bit. Cueto says Puma is defending his title tonight. Cage: “No. That means he’s losing it tonight.”

Mil Muertes vs. Fenix

The fans are way into Muertes. Granted they’re also way into Fenix. It’s almost like these fans are very easily entertained. Or they’re plants. This is a rematch from when Muertes beat Fenix to earn the last spot in Aztec Warfare. Fenix hits some running knees in the corner but Muertes just nails him with a right hand to the jaw.

An overhead suplex sends Fenix into the corner as the announcers get into an odd argument over how many moves Striker can call. Muertes keeps hammering away and throws Fenix off the top for two. Mil takes him up top for a superplex but Fenix interlocks their legs as they hit the mat and gets a VERY fast three count.

Rating: D+. I’m not a fan of that kind of booking and I never have been. Fenix was getting squashed here and then they have him get a quick pin for the surprise win. They did the same thing with Drago vs. Cuerno a few weeks back and I didn’t care for it then either. It’s also not a good sign that they’re already repeating finishes.

Video on Cage and how determined he is to destroy everyone around him. The video shows a bottle being broken over the back of his head and then punching a guy in the face. Oddly enough, this worked.

Argenis/Super Fly/Aerostar vs. Crenshaw Crew

Oh dear now I get to try to figure out who these people are. I believe Super Fly vs. Cortez gets us going. Not that I’d know because the commentators have to get in their backstories instead of talking about what’s in front of them. Either that or they don’t know either. Everything quickly breaks down and Super Fly dives on everyone. Striker’s first commentary about what’s in front of him: “WOW!” Come on we can’t even get WHAT A MANEUVER?

Cisco and I think Argenis come in (not that Striker seems to know his name) and things speed up again with Argenis getting two off a belly to back suplex. Cisco gets in a shot to the face and it’s back to Cortez who takes a hurricanrana, allowing for the tag to Aerostar, who climbs onto Argenis’ shoulders on the middle rope for a HUGE cross body. Since this is a lucha match though, Cortez is up in three seconds and kicking Aerostar in the face. Super Fly gets drawn in but the referee is fine with the faces double teaming. Cisco helps his partner to kick Aerostar down in the corner and send Fly to the floor as this is a big mess.

Cortez (gah or is it Cisco? Why do they have to wear the EXACT SAME CLOTHES?) stomps on Aerostar’s back before it’s off to Cisco for a bite to the mask. Bale gets two off a butterfly suplex and Cisco cranks on a chinlock. The fans get behind Aerostar as he fights up and climbs the ropes for a jumping back elbow to the jaw. Double tags bring in Bale and Argenis with the latter hitting a springboard hurricanrana and a sunset flip with Cortez and Bale having to break up the cover.

Cisco comes back in with a springboard double stomp for two as this match needs to end already. Argenis backdrops him down and makes the tag to Aerostar for a springboard splash. Everything breaks down and Argenis dives onto a bunch of people at ringside. Aerostar hurricanranas Cisco off the top onto the big pile before running inside for a springboard flip dive, drawing Striker’s third WOW of the match. Back in and the 3D into the Codebreaker is enough for Cortez to pin Aerostar.

Rating: C+. I’ve heard the criticism over the years that lucha libre has almost no psychology and it’s all about getting in your spots and doing the finish. I’ve never seen that criticism embodied more in a single match than this one. Yeah it was a fun match, but it was spot spot spot, pop up in four seconds, bunch of flips, finish. Oh and GET THE CREW DIFFERENT CLOTHES! I probably got every name wrong in the match, but at the end of the day, Cortez, Cisco and Bale are three versions of the same guy so it really doesn’t matter.

We get another sitdown interview with Vampiro talking to Konnan and Puma. Vampiro asks Puma how he’s feeling after winning the title but Konnan cuts him off to say Puma is mad after beating everyone and then getting jumped by Cage. Konnan, looking like he’s gained about 100lbs of neck fat since he left TNA, says Cage is going to the hospital. Vampiro is tired of Konnan answering for Puma and they get in each others faces. Vampiro looks ancient.

Lucha Underground Title: Prince Puma vs. Cage

Konnan is at ringside for the first time. Puma dives on Cage during the introductions and hits a nice middle rope hurricanrana to take Cage down. That’s fine with Cage who just runs him over with a clothesline and starts driving shoulders in the corner. Cage slaps on a half nelson with a chinlock and grabs a swinging neckbreaker for no cover. A victory roll gets two for Puma but a headscissors is countered into a sitout Alabama Slam for two.

Cage’s powerslam is countered into a tornado DDT but he just muscles Puma over into a butterfly suplex. Puma kicks out of a superplex attempt but dives into a Jackhammer (cool spot) for two. The big man busts out a middle rope moonsault, and a good one at that, for two of his own.

Back up and Puma hits some kicks but gets caught in a triple powerbomb, only to roll through the third and hit a basement dropkick before collapsing. They stagger up and Cage is launched face first into the middle buckle but comes back with a northern lights suplex into a snap suplex (minus the snap) for two. Puma loads up the 630 but Cage shoves the referee into the ropes and hits Puma low for the DQ.

Rating: B-. Good match but it was only there to set up a rematch. I liked the idea of Cage being the unusual power guy to the high flying champ and it will be a good win when Puma pins him to retain the title. It’s not a great match but it makes up for some weaker stuff earlier by actually having a story.

Cage hits him with a Downward Spiral as Konnan gets up on the apron. He breaks the cane over Cage’s back and takes the worst title shot I’ve ever seen. Cage rips the belt in half for the best move of the night. Seriously that thing was ugly.

The mystery woman from recent weeks shoves Cueto into his chair and says he’s looking for a man. Cueto tells her to question anyone she wants but she says something that sounds like “retonza.” He doesn’t know what it means and she disappears with a woosh sound effect to end the show.

Overall Rating: C+. This show was all over the place. You had some decent wrestling, some matches that felt like they went on forever, some storyline development, and some booking that made me want to rip my hair out. That being said, Lucha Underground is still really good at getting in a lot of stuff in the span of an hour. I’m also really liking the sitdown interviews. Yeah they’re short but they do a really good job of advancing stories in a hurry. I still wouldn’t mind Vampiro and Striker being replaced by drunken antelopes but you can’t have everything.

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