Monday Night Raw – February 1, 2016: It Takes Talent To Be This Shortsighted

Monday Night Raw
Date: February 1, 2016
Location: Legacy Arena, Birmingham, Alabama
Commentators: Byron Saxton, John Bradshaw Layfield, Michael Cole

We have a main event set for Fastlane and Brock Lesnar is back tonight to give us all three in the same building tonight. Other than that you can see most of the card from here, but the important questions are what happens between now and Wrestlemania and whether or not new stories will start after the February pay per view. Let’s get to it.

Opening sequence.

We open with Brock and Heyman with the former in a new red Suplex City shirt. Heyman immediately talks about the Wyatts, whose plot to get rid of Brock from the Royal Rumble worked, but it isn’t keeping him out of the main event of Wrestlemania. Now Lesnar is in a triple threat at Fastlane and that means it’s time for Roman Reigns and Dean Ambrose to go to Suplex City. After that, Lesnar will conquer the billion dollar trophy husband to become the new WWE World Heavyweight Champion. Heyman goes back to the triple threat so here’s Ambrose to interrupt.

Dean gets right in Brock’s face and asks Heyman (or Porky) who he’s calling a nutjob. Ambrose isn’t stupid, crazy or scared right now because he respects Lesnar. That’s why he wants to stand in front of Brock and tell him how much he wants the title. He’s willing to fight his brother and Lesnar at the same time, even though he knows the beating that’s coming for him at Fastlane. It better be the best beating Lesnar has ever given though because Dean is going to do whatever it takes to go to Fastlane and take the title from HHH. Dean actually leaves with no violence and Lesnar smiles.

Kalisto vs. Rusev

Non-title and Alberto Del Rio is on commentary because he gets another title shot at Fastlane. Rusev (with Lana in his corner) shoves him around to start but Kalisto starts firing off the kicks that almost every small guy uses against a bigger opponent. A hurricanrana is blocked though, only to have Kalisto stay with it and take Rusev out to the floor. The champ’s dive is countered by a kick to the head though and we take a break.

Back with Kalisto charging into a shot in the corner as some of the fans in the front rows are doing the Lucha Dragons dance. A tornado DDT sends Rusev down but he plants Kalisto with a release Rock Bottom for two of his own. As you might expect, Kalisto pops right back up with a dropkick to the knee and the hurricanrana driver.

Rusev obeys the referee’s command to kick out but gets kicked to the floor. Kalisto’s dive is caught but he escapes what looks like a fall away slam and dropkicks Rusev into the steps. Another hurricanrana sends Rusev into the barricade and Kalisto dives back in for the countout win at 10:11. That was one of the slowest ten counts I’ve ever seen.

Rating: D+. Yeah yeah we get the idea: Kalisto goes through the League before getting to face Del Rio again. This would be so much easier to watch if we didn’t have to see five matches between the two of them in about two months. I’m just tired of seeing the two of them fight, even though the matches are watchable enough.

Stephanie and Reigns are in the back with the new HHH World Title belt when Ambrose comes in. Both guys are willing to do whatever it takes to get that title at Wrestlemania but Stephanie implies that they might turn on each other. She even says Ambrose is Reigns’ sidekick but Dean thinks it’s the other way around. That earns them a match against New Day in the main event. Nothing we haven’t seen on Smackdown a half dozen times, but WWE doesn’t care about Smackdown either.

We look at Nikki Bella’s neck surgery.

Brie Bella says her sister is in bed watching the WWE Network. Cue Charlotte and Ric to brag about beating Nikki for the Divas Title. Charlotte would be concerned about Nikki’s injuries if she had any reason to. Brie is left looking sad and good night they’re actually wanting to make me care about BRIE BELLA feeling bad? That’s the point we’ve reached?

Usos vs. Curtis Axel/Adam Rose

The Usos are announced as the Grammy Award winning Tag Team of the Year. They even re-air it after the break to make fun of Lillian’s flub. There’s no Bo Dallas due to his dad being in the hospital, so Slater says he’s in the studio after his battle with Flo Rida last week. Axel kicks Jey in the ribs to start and it’s off to Rose, who comes in with a top rope knee to the chest. The announcers go on about Stephanie suggesting that absolute power corrupts absolutely because they exist to push her stupid lines.

Axel’s chinlock keeps things slow and Rose’s makes it even worse until Jimmy enziguris him down. Jey comes in with a bunch of superkicks (including one where Axel telegraphed it worse than anything I’ve seen in years). At least four superkicks in a row set up a double superkick and the Superfly Splash for the pin on Rose at 5:11.

Rating: O. For obnoxious. Yeah Lillian screwed up a line so let’s spend the whole match going on and on because NO ONE IN WWE HAS EVER SCREWED UP A LINE BECAUSE THEY’RE TOTALLY PERFECT AND THE GREATEST THING EVER. It’s stuff like that which makes the whole company seem so stuck up that it drives me insane. Get over yourselves already and call the match instead of making fun of Garcia (a woman that people like Kevin Dunn, who I would almost bet was behind that whole thing, could never get) or talking about how insightful Stephanie’s stuff was. The match sucked by the way.

Back from a break with WWE bragging about being on American Airlines in-flight magazine. Yeah that gets ten seconds but Lillian’s flub gets a full match.

It’s time for MizTV with special guest AJ Styles. Miz gets right to the point by cutting off AJ before he can say a word to every question. He lists off AJ’s accomplishments such as being the smallest guy on the football team and coming from rural Georgia. AJ has gone all over the world and finally got to the WWE where he lasted nearly half an hour in the Royal Rumble. Then he defeated Chris Jericho in his debut match, which is a big reason why Miz sees a lot of Daniel Bryan in AJ.

Miz goes on another rant about how he fathered the YES Movement before telling the fans to be quiet. The fans think AJ (who hasn’t said a word yet) can make it in the WWE without Miz’s guidance but there’s no chance of that happening. That’s enough for AJ as he goes off on Miz in the corner and chases him off for the big hero moment. I get the idea here, but Miz actually gave AJ quite the introduction, which was probably the other intended purpose.

Brie Bella vs. Charlotte

Non-title, mainly because Brie never wins anything and therefore probably shouldn’t be in this story. Brie starts fast but the BRIE MODE knee is countered with Charlotte sending her to the floor. The figure four neck lock keeps Brie in trouble but she makes the required clothesline comeback. Now the BRIE MODE knee (minus the shouting of BRIE MODE) connects and it’s off to a sleeper, only to have Ric get up on the apron. Amazingly enough the powers of Alicia Fox aren’t enough to do anything, allowing Charlotte to use something like a Stunner to escape. Charlotte slaps on the Figure Four but gets rolled up for the pin at 4:45.

Rating: F. GAH THIS STUPID FREAKING COMPANY!!! So we already have the triple threat set up at Fastlane with the three NXT women but now we get the addition of BRIE BELLA so the spirit of Nikki can be upon us. I’m sure Brie will be fighting for her sister’s honor or some nonsense like that because Brie and Nikki are now faces after being heels for like ever because of reasons that aren’t important enough to explain. Didn’t they learn anything in the Divas Revolution when Brie was dragging down every freaking match she was in with the NXT women? And it was a clean pin. On the champion. Live on Raw. Just so much dumb.

We look back at Big Show saving Reigns and Ambrose from the Wyatts on Smackdown.

Erick Rowan vs. Big Show

Show grabs the stairs to hold off Strowman and the announcers somehow don’t bring up the stairs match these two had a few years back. Rowan can’t suplex Show (because he’s a big bad show tonight) and after spearing Strowman off the apron, the chokeslam puts Rowan away at 1:20.

Post match the Wyatts (minus Bray who is in Florida with his dad as well) beat Show down and slam him onto the steps.

Titus O’Neil vs. Tyler Breeze

At least Breeze has his full entrance back. Titus throws him into the corner to start but Breeze is smart enough to take out the knee, which is quickly wrapped around the post. We hit the half crab on Titus before he throws Tyler across the ring all the way from his back. A HUGE clothesline drops Breeze and the Clash of the Titus is good for the pin at 2:49.

HHH comes in to see Brock and asks why Dean was allowed to live. Brock says he’ll see HHH at Wrestlemania.

Dolph Ziggler vs. Kevin Owens

Owens won last week and that’s got me very worried here. It’s a brawl to start with Owens naturally getting the better of it. Ziggler gets thrown over the top and into the timekeeper’s area as we take a break. Back with Ziggler jawbreaking his way out of a chinlock but getting crushed by the Cannonball for two. A hard elbow drops Ziggler again but he avoids a charge in the corner and hits three straight Stinger Splashes.

Thankfully Kevin will have none of that and clotheslines Dolph’s head off, only to get dumped out to the floor. Back in and Owens superkicks Dolph’s head off for two but takes too long going up. Ziggler’s superplex is blocked though, allowing Owens to get him into the Tree of Woe. Another Cannonball connects (that looked great) and now the Pop Up Powerbomb is….countered into the Zig Zag for the pin at 10:35.

Rating: D+. That’s mostly for the ending because WWE is going out of their way to screw themselves over. Kevin Owens has the potential to be something fun and fresh as a heel but we need the 50/50 booking with DOLPH ZIGGLER. Owens could be a World Champion (and if there has EVER been a time when they need someone to step up and be a big deal, it might be before Wrestlemania with Rollins and Cena both hurt) by the end of the year but he’s losing here because of whatever stupid philosophy they have. This actually made me mad and what makes it even worse is that you knew it was coming the whole way.

Video on Mark Henry for Black History Month.

Here’s Sasha Banks for a match but first she has something to say. Sasha says she’s on her own and no one is going to stop her from winning the title. This brings out Naomi and Tamina because the world was waiting for the Team BAD blowoff. Naomi says she knew this was coming but Sasha wants them to still be friends. They do the UNITY pose and everything seems cool. Of course.

Becky Lynch vs. Sasha Banks

They trade rollups to start with Sasha getting the better of it and hitting the double knees in the corner. Becky gets knocked to the floor but Sasha doesn’t want Tamina and Naomi to help. She says she doesn’t need the help so Tamina and Naomi pull her to the floor for the DQ 3:40.

Rating: D+. No time of course because the NXT women never get a chance to do anything. I’d like to repeat though: no one cares about Tamina and Naomi and they’re clearly just doing this (possibly a tag feud for Fastlane) so we can get BRIE BELLA as a title contender. Yeah it’s a fill in challenger, but why not spend the extra time setting up your big Wrestlemania match instead of wasting your time on a nothing feud with no drama?

Post match Becky saves Sasha from the beatdown.

We get a clip of JBL interviewing Ron Simmons on the Network.

Chris Jericho says everyone has been talking about AJ Styles….except for him. Everything about their match last week was tremendous except for the outcome. AJ showed that he’s a tenacious pitbull and Jericho is going to be watching AJ’s match with Miz on Smackdown.

R-Truth goes into the bathroom and finds Goldust crouching on the toilet. Goldust still won’t take no for an answer on the team but Truth thinks Goldust is a weirdo. That means it’s time to bring up Little Jimmy, which seems to get to Truth a bit. Remember like eight days ago when Truth was still crazy and not the straight man in these vignettes?

New Day vs. Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose

Non-title because the champions need to lose again and Heyman is on commentary. Before the match, Woods talks about how the comments from Rock have Francesca so upset that she can’t sleep at night. Rocky needs to think of the children, like the one they point at in the front row doing the New Day dance. Tonight they’re taking care of Rock’s cousin and they’ll throw in Dean too.

Reigns and Kofi get things going with Kingston having to get out of a Samoan Drop, earning himself a right hand to the head. It’s off to Dean for a basement clothesline as Heyman is already frustrated with Cole’s talk about Ambrose staring Lesnar down earlier. The threat of the Superman Punch causes Woods and Big E. to pull Kofi to the floor as we take a break.

Back with Big E. missing the Apron Splash but Ambrose is kept in trouble with a whip into the steps. Kofi kicks him in the head for two as Woods jumps in on commentary to yell about how awesome they are. Ambrose stays in trouble and Big E. gets two off a splash. Heyman is trying to get in on this but there’s only so much you can do with Woods blasting that trombone.

We hit the abdominal stretch (Woods: “Stretch the abs!”) but Dean doesn’t like the spanking and bites Big E.’s nose. A suplex allows the hot tag to Reigns and it’s time for some corner clotheslines. The other hot tag brings in Ambrose as everything breaks down. The Superman Punch sets up Dirty Deeds on Big E. for the pin at 17:22.

Rating: D+. Hey look: champions lose again clean. This is how things work in WWE this time of year and they really don’t care how obvious they make it coming in. The match was fine but they made it clear that New Day was losing here for the sake of pushing Reigns and Ambrose. Pushing the two of them is fine, but it’s really sad that they had no one else to lose to Reigns and Ambrose. Can you imagine sitting through another League “showdown”?

Post match Brock comes out for the showdown but New Day attacks Reigns, allowing Brock to F5 Ambrose to end the show.

Overall Rating: D-. Oh man this one was rough. This was a show where they made it clear that they don’t care what’s going on until the night after Fastlane, which makes me wonder why I’m going to watch until then. We’re getting stuff like Brie Bella fighting for the spirit of her sister, whose goal in life is to get John Cena to marry and impregnate her. That’s my hero in the Divas division.

On top of that, there’s the nonsense with the 50/50 booking. Again: the roster is so depleted right now and tonight we saw Dolph Ziggler, the definition of career midcarder, is beating Kevin Owens clean. Why? Just because Owens won last week and we need to set up something at Fastlane. Instead of having Owens look like a killer and setting up something big at Wrestlemania, we need to see this nothing feud and story that is only taking place to fill in time before we get to Wrestlemania.

Then why have Fastlane? Why not just give us a ten week build to Wrestlemania? That’s where WWE loses me. It’s clear that they’re just having a filler show at Fastlane, so why should I bother paying attention for the next three weeks? They’re resetting again after the show and we’ve got a month before the biggest show of all time. Well done on making it feel special WWE. Really, it takes talent to be this shortsighted.

Results

Kalisto b. Rusev via countout

Usos b. Curtis Axel/Adam Rose – Superfly Splash to Rose

Brie Bella b. Charlotte – Small package

Big Show b. Erick Rowan – Chokeslam

Titus O’Neil b. Tyler Breeze – Clash of the Titus

Dolph Ziggler b. Kevin Owens – Zig Zag

Roman Reigns/Dean Ambrose b. New Day – Dirty Deeds to Big E.

Remember to follow me on Twitter @kbreviews and pick up my new book of the Complete Monday Nitro Reviews Volume IV at Amazon for just $3.99 at:

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36 Responses

  1. Mystery Man says:

    Point one: Fair enough. I just think it’s smarky to bring that up (even if it is true) when we are dealing with someone sticking up for their recovering sister. And let’s not forget that Brie is a former divas champion in her own right, and was in a big feud with Stephanie in 2014.

    Point two: What if making Owens that next big star isn’t in WWE’s plans? I agree they need more stars but Owens probably isn’t the answer.

    • Thomas Hall says:

      Let’s also not forget that she’s won one singles match on Raw since August. She’s horrible in the ring and I have no reason to care about her other than her sister. That’s really not good enough.

      In the words of Red from The Natural: “Well we sure need somebody.”

    • ted says:

      “Point one: Fair enough. I just think it’s smarky to bring that up (even if it is true) when we are dealing with someone sticking up for their recovering sister. ”

      Except it doesn’t work like that. Nikki bella was a heel for almost all of 2015. I’m supposed to cheer her because she got hurt and it’s courageous to come back? What about all the bad stuff she’s done? Is my memory only supposed to go back a couple weeks now?

      This is the thing I hate the most that the wwe does now. They meld real world events and wwe storyline. You can’t do this. The wwe shows do not exist in the real world. you have to suspend your disbelief. Nikki can not just come back and be a face. Brie cannot just decide to be a face one week. Your going to confuse your audience or worse they may end up not caring. Which is where most of them are at for the brie.

      “And let’s not forget that Brie is a former divas champion in her own right, and was in a big feud with Stephanie in 2014. ”

      Except she sucks. She is not treated as someone important or someone to pay attention to. Even when she was champion. Her big feud with stephanie was a bag of balls. Do not pretend it was important it wasn’t.

      “Point two: What if making Owens that next big star isn’t in WWE’s plans? I agree they need more stars but Owens probably isn’t the answer”

      Okay lets say it isn’t. That still doesn’t explain why you’d flatline him and everyone else. You have to elevate someone don’t you? Also how would you or the wwe know unless they try it?

      • Eric says:

        Except that this is almost always the case. Most famously, HHH tears a quad while being insanely evil, comes back 9 months later to one of the biggest pops ever. Yeah, WWE can expect their fans to have short term memories because they do. Heck, when we do a babyface turn, it’s generally one action of saving someone or doing a good thing and that means we can cheer a person while forgetting all the dastardly stuff they’ve done. It’s the nature of wrestling.

        • Thomas Hall says:

          True but that was a much more organic reaction. This is WWE saying “yeah you’re going to like this person.” Also it was nine months, not a few weeks like here.

  2. Dookie Blaster 4.0 says:

    doesn’t matter Jay H. he’s still right about some things

    • Jay H (the real one) says:

      Actually it does matter. I’m way past tired of his act. Though I guess you like him calling everyone here idiots.

      • Senor Ding Dong says:

        Who is he calling here specifically an idiot? Or do you feel that because he is pointing out the things that your favourite show does badly he is somehow insulting you? I mean that would explain why you’ve said you’re over him almost as many times as he’s said he’s going to stop watching.

      • Dookie Blaster 4.0 says:

        lol why does it matter? but, yes i love it. brings great joy to my heart.

  3. Dookie Blaster 4.0 says:

    i mean, dude is at least 95% right

    • Jay H (the real one) says:

      This coming from a guy who constantly threatens to quit watching. Yet the next week he’s right back here with his little rants. Im still waiting on him to leave especially a year ago he said after January 5th he would.

  4. Dragon says:

    They should bring back squash matches and jobbers…..save the showdowns for the big events. Like the Golden Era.

  5. Proph says:

    The bullet club shirts being shown on Raw during the New Day segment.

    Important to note or coincidence?

  6. Greg says:

    Minor correction on Bo and Bray, their grandpa is in the hospital not IRS.

    Miz. Holy crap, he did great. Haven’t seen something like that out of him in a long time. Shit show though.

  7. ted says:

    I agree, also it looks like the reigns experiment is coming to an end soon. I know I say that as he gets a title shot at fastlane. It just seems to me Lesnar and Ambrose are being featured more.

    • Thomas Hall says:

      I’m a bigger Reigns fan than you but yeah this attempt with him as the very top guy just is not working. They can get him over as a main event guy but not THE main event guy. At least not now and not like this.

  8. Thomas Hall says:

    Short one first: watch Total Divas. Every season has revolved around Nikki wanting Cena to marry her and give her babies.

    As for Owens, he’s the one who is happening at the moment. They have no Cena, Rollins and others but they’re going with the 50/50 stuff again. What does having Owens lose here do? What does having Ziggler win here? Make me want to see them fight again? They need to stop worrying about this…..whatever it is and realize that they need to make someone else a big deal in case they lose people due to injuries.

    • Jay H (the real one) says:

      I am going to predict though that KO will win MITB this year.

    • Heyo says:

      This is a big reason why I snapped. They continue to do their 50/50 booking, which is seemingly there to make sure nobody gets over, at a time when they need to make stars more than ever before.

  9. That guy from Germany says:

    It’s 5 a.m. here in Europe. I just woke up and I thought before I search the internet for raw, I should check the reviews for the show first. Amazing how much you can hate a show you didn’t actually see. (And never will see, because there’s no way I’m wasting time or energy on watching this. )
    Right now the card for Fastlane looks like this:

    Brie vs Charlotte (It’s like Bo Dallas getting world title shot)

    Sasha/Becky vs Tamina/Naomi (Anybody remember Sasha viciously attacking Becky and kicking her in the stomach just a couple of days ago?)

    Stowman squashing Big Show (Im okay with that. The match itself will suck bigtime)

    Owens vs Ziggler (Can’t wait to see that… for the 15th time )

    Kalisto vs Del Rio (Just like Owens/Ziggler: Good match nobody wants to see anymore)

    Reigns vs Lesnar vs Ambrose (That one’s actually interesting. I have a feeling they really pull the trigger on Ambrose. The only thing that is predictable in this match is Lesnar not winning because of the Wyatt’s)

  10. Mystery Man says:

    Your reviews are getting more and more smarky. Disappointing.

    • Thomas Hall says:

      I’d disagree in general but yeah this one was. This show felt like a really big punch to the face of fans who are wanting something new, which is annoying after a really solid Rumble.

      • ted says:

        Mystery Man says: Your reviews are getting more and more smarky. Disappointing.

        So your saying you prefer blind praise? even when the show is bad? That shit with Lillian was inexcusable. Unfunny and just plain spiteful and mean spirited.

        • Mystery Man says:

          I can agree with him there. But whining over Kevin Owens losing and saying that Nikki’s Goal in life is to be impregnated by john Cena is very smarky.

  11. I do believe there are incredibly unrealistic expectations at times with the WWE. They did give us a rocking Rumble – and the Raw after Rumble was just as great.

    I don’t believe I could do a better job with this roster; I doubt any on this forum can either. But…that said, I am petrified on what they are going to do with Styles.

    • ted says:

      Could be that your expectations are to low. The rumble in my opinion was fine at best. but even if it were great. Why does that excuse terrible raw?

      • maybe my expectations are low; or yours too high.

        I don’t discount the fact that this was an unimaginative raw. And I did agree with KB that the booking leaves me fretting for the outcome with AJ.

  12. Thadzo says:

    “February 1, 2016: It Takes Talent To Be This Shortsighted”

    Oh, I’m gonna love this review, aren’t I?

    Yes. Yesssss.

  13. beckett929 says:

    Can they just put Ziggler and ADR in the same angle so I can just ignore one segment each week with the two men on the roster I genuinely despise.

    Miz is great at what he does.

    Naomi and Tamina sold their turn on Sasha worse than John Stewart at Summerslam. They’re so awful.

    Yeah, this was a bad show and I’m a huge optimist.

  14. Heyo says:

    I’m convinced that Vince just doesn’t care at this point and he’s gone full senile. Why else would you go out of your way to 50/50 book everyone and refuse to make new stars, when you’re in the perfect position to do that with all the injuries?

    I mean, for God’s sake, he was pissed off at THE ROCK, who helped pop a rating with a great segment with the New Day, because the Rock didn’t do it “his way”. This is starting to resemble Vince’s opponents in the 80s, where it didn’t matter to them if fans hated what they had to show, because it was “their way” and that’s all that mattered to them.

    I’m seriously convinced that this company is doomed. Vince is doing things that make no sense to anyone but him, but in his mind, that’s all that matters. And that’s why you’re going to see more 50/50 booking, more NXT talent get buried because he doesn’t get it anymore, and more attempts to make Reigns the only guy worth anything that’s not named Cena. Or Steph, because God help us if Steph isn’t the most important woman in WWE.

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