Monday Night Raw – March 22, 1993 (2020 Redo): The New Low
Monday Night Raw
Date: March 22, 1993
Location: Manhattan Center, New York City, New York
Commentators: Vince McMahon, Randy Savage, Rob Bartlett
Please no more Bartlett impressions. I don’t think I can handle it again after the Elvis and Vince stuff, which was neither funny nor anything of value, but I can’t imagine Bartlett sticks around that much longer. Other than that we are less than two weeks off from Wrestlemania, meaning it’s time for whatever we can get in the form of a final push in 1993. Let’s get to it.
We open with a look at the WWF stars at something called the Michael Landon Awards. This is set to A Whole New World from Aladdin of all things. Apparently this is for children’s leukemia research and there is nothing wrong with that. Hulk Hogan gives a speech asking for leftovers for some reason before introducing a video about wrestlers’ charity work. This is feeling about as much like a fluff piece as you can get so far.
Now we get some clips from wrestlers telling us to not smoke or do drugs. Interestingly enough here, Vince is actually acknowledged as the president and CEO of the WWF for one of (if not the) first times ever. Back to the awards ceremony as Hogan talks about meeting a kid who died a few weeks later before introducing Vince who is receiving some award. Hogan sucks up to Vince for a bit, even calling him a hero.
Vince comes out to accept the award to a sped up version of Gonna Fly Now from Rocky. He talks about how great it is to make a kid feel good for just a few moments and how good it feels to give a dying kid a feeling like that and take their minds off their problems for just a few moments. Vince accepts the award on behalf of his superstars who really deserve it.
We are now a good chunk of the way into the show, with none of this being shown or mentioned on the Network due to the music.
Bushwhackers vs. Damien Demento/Repo Man
Was everyone else late getting to the show or something? The Bushwhackers comes through the crowd for reasons that aren’t exactly clear, nor do they seem to be known by the production team. Their entrance even takes them all the way through a break until it’s Demento vs. Butch to get things going. Demento drives him into the corner to start but everything breaks down in a hurry with the Bushwhackers biting both of them on the trunks.
That means a bunch of marching around the ring as the villains take a breather on the floor. Back in and Repo takes over on Luke, followed by Demento dropping a leg between the legs. Luke finally gets in a shot to the face and the hot tag (read as: no reaction in the slightest) brings in Butch to start cleaning house. Everything breaks down and Luke knocks Butch onto Demento. There’s no cover so Repo elbows Demento by mistake and it’s the Battering Ram to finish Repo at 5:27.
Rating: D-. Oh goodness no. The Bushwhackers were never the most serious team (and yes I know who the Sheepherders are before someone points it out) and this was bad even for them. It was a match that felt out of time and I still can’t fathom how long the team stayed around. Terrible stuff here, and an even worse choice to start the show.
Tatanka vs. Reno Riggins
Riggins jumps him to start but gets backdropped for his efforts. Back up and Riggins’ sleeper is quickly broken up so it’s an armdrag into an armbar. Riggins fights up and avoids a charge into the corner but a ram into the buckle sends Tatanka onto the war path. A powerslam into the Papoose To Go finishes Riggins at 3:31.
Rating: D+. I know Tatanka is one of the most stereotypical of all the stereotypical characters but he was good at what he did. It’s a good example of someone who took what he had and ran with it while managing to get it over. Tatanka would be quite the midcard star and while this wasn’t great, at least he did get a reaction.
There is going to be a WWF Hall Of Fame and we get one of the only choices for the first inductee with Andre The Giant. It’s always great to see some of these old clips.
Money Inc. vs. Scott Rich/Jeff Armstrong
Non-title. DiBiase starts with Rich, who looks like Lance Storm if he shrunk in the wash. A clothesline puts Rich on the floor in a hurry as Bartlett is flipping through the channels to see what else is on TV. For some reason I remember seeing that when it first aired and…yeah it’s kind of dumb. IRS comes in to take over on Armstrong and DiBiase elbows him in the face for a bonus. A powerslam from DiBiase sets up the Write Off (jumping clothesline) to finish Armstrong at 3:02.
Rating: D. The ‘watching the competition” deal was stupid but it’s not as bad as the impressions. What was kind of stupid was thinking that 1993 Ted DiBiase and IRS with the flying clothesline of pain was going to be enough to beat Hulk Hogan at Wrestlemania. It would have been a stretch five years ago and we’re supposed to buy it here?
It’s time for the Wrestlemania Report as the show is almost here. It’s a double main event if you don’t get that idea yet and everyone is going to be wearing togas. Gene says his is rather small and….well I’ve seen him in trunks before so that’s a disturbing idea.
Kamala vs. Doink The Clown
Doink’s hair is looking especially big here and Slick is with Kamala. Doink has a present for Kamala, which is a bit I’ve seen on Coliseum Video before. Kamala goes for the present and gets taken down into an armbar. The armbar is broken up and Kamala chops him into the corner for the splash. We take a break and come back with Doink being chopped to the floor…where Doink hands him the present. Kamala opens it up to find nothing inside and it’s a countout at 7:10.
Rating: D-. Somehow the horrible Coliseum Video match was better, which doesn’t exactly say much. Doink was someone who had something interesting to him with all of the mind games but what in the world were they expecting out of this? Kamala as a face was such a weird idea and it went as well as you would expect here.
Post match Kamala chases him underneath the ring so Doink whips out a chair, only to have Kamala come out from the other side and chase Doink through the crowd.
And now, Rob Bartlett has a fan club. They’re the older Raw Ring Girls and Savage and Vince are really, REALLY unimpressed. Rob kisses one of them and this is still not funny.
We get a preview for Sunday’s March To Wrestlemania special to wrap it up.
Overall Rating: F. Horrible indeed, as the best match on the show a Tatanka squash. Wrestlemania is up next thank goodness, though I can’t bring myself to care about it whatsoever. It’s a completely two match show and this show barely covered Bret vs. Yokozuna in the main event. Money Inc. vs. the Mega Maniacs is being treated as the biggest match on the show and I can’t bring myself to care about Hogan in a tag match at Wrestlemania. This was the new low benchmark for Raw at the moment though, both for how bad it was on its own and then how little it made me want to see the important show.
There is no March 29 Raw so the next show is on April 5. I have however done the March To Wrestlemania special and you can check it out right here if you’re interested:
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